#and have to mentally remove yourself from what you are eating and what it means

[novelconcepts]

This show is incredible, and has so many scenes that are just haunting.

[cursingtoji]

listening to ghost and soap infamous “are you ugly?” conversation and not being able to stop thinking about what ghost meant by “quite the opposite”

you’re used to having him wearing his mask even whenever you two escape to blow off some steam, but since that day you’ve been building up some courage to ask the same thing soap tried to.

“take it off” you murmur with your lips inches away from his mask while setting a pace riding him.

Ghost, who was spread out on the couch raised his head, “y’r gettin’ spoiled, brat. last week was a kiss now you want my whole face?” he gives your ass a mean slap.

“’s not fair” you pout, whilst you are completely naked every time, simon only removes his shirt when you beg, maybe lowers his pants down to his ankles instead of just enough to let out his cock, but that’s it.

“Aight, want me to lose the mask?” he takes your black shirt, folding it sloppily until it’s narrow then he puts around your eyes tying on the back of your head.

“simon! no!” you raise your hands to undo it, he’s faster though, taking both your wrists and holding in the air. you hear some fumbling and suddenly your palms are being tickled by a stubble, you gasp realizing under your hands is ghost’s uncovered face.

“keep ridin’” he demands, adjusting his body to lay lower and thrusting you from bellow as a reminder he’s still inside.

you bite your lips, needing to put a hand on his chest as support, your other hand explores his face trying to paint a mental image of him.

his jawline is sharp, a few uneven parts along his skin, probably scars, there’s more hair on his chin than the rest of his jaw and to imagine simon with a blond goatee make you clench.

“shit” he curses tightening the grip on your hips, “what’re you so excited ‘bout, private? huh?” he pinches your nipple. you run your fingertips on his bottom lip, it’s thin and he could use some lip balm, but the excitement about touching him in such a intimate way gives you hope to one day convince him to let you apply lip balm on his lips, “behave” he growls.

“‘m behaving, sir” you smile sheepishly forgetting he can actually see your face. ghost takes your hand, making you close it and leaving just your index up. under the improvised blindfold you frown, next his lips are wrapping around your finger and his tongue is under your digit.

your clit throbs, not expecting this from your lieutenant.

“fuck, Lt.” you arch your back, approaching your orgasm.

“faster” both his hands are gripping your ass, he groans and you feel the vibration on your finger. you obey as one does, slapping your ass on his mighty thighs, as he sucks your finger, even letting some saliva run down your palm.

“si-mon ‘m close” you lose yourself on the sensation, seeing nothing makes you more aware of the stretch his cock gives you, not to mention the sounds your lieutenant is trying to hold. with one last suck he removes your finger, moving it to your own clit, where he presses it on your bud.

“cum then” you’re so close, but that’s one thing you still want.

“can i kiss you?” you edge yourself waiting for his answer, he sighs and you take it as a negative response, but his other hand leaves your ass as he guides your face to his where his lips awaited yours, he immediately pushes his tongue in, that’s merely your second kiss and you’re already coming.

“louder, i think the terrorists haven’t heard ya” he teases when you moan a high pitched note.

“fuck you, sir” you’re still riding him intensely, knowing he’s close too. he bites your lip, forcing your hips up and down faster and groaning as he fills your insides.

by the time you remove the blindfold, his mask is back on and you sigh in defeat, moving away from his lap and getting one last spank.

“goatee” you whisper in soap’s ear as he is about to eat his morning scrambled eggs.

“wut?” he turns to you.

“he has a goatee” you wink and leave to get your own breakfast. poor johnny is still processing what was said when ghost enters the room, later than usual.

soap drops his fork.

[tootiecakes234]

I just know you would receive “gifts” from Katsuki all the time. They’d be little things to make your life easier that you didn’t even know you needed.

You like to read at night to unwind, but sometimes it’ll be a really good book so you want to stay up reading it. The thing is you don’t wanna bother Katsuki cuz you know he has a strict bedtime. This means often times you’ll stay a little longer in the living room reading as to not bother him.

One night you’re getting ready for bed when you see a box next to your bed.

“Hey Kat, is this yours?”, you say loud enough for him to hear you in the bathroom.

He peaks his head out the door and says, “No, I ordered it for you.” And then goes back to what he was doing.

You sit on the edge of the bed and open it up. It’s a reading light with a dampener so you can adjust the brightness.

He comes dragging his little slippered feet towards his side of the bed.

“Now you can keep your ass in bed. Tired of waking up and you being asleep on the couch. I’m an old man, I can’t keep carrying you to bed.”

You look at him with a bright smile on your face.

“You know you can just say, you like me being in the bed with you while you’re sleeping. You know, because I’m your big bad protector and I make you feel safe.”

“There is no talking to you sometimes you know that?”

It’s winter time and you always have your gloves on because you HATE your fingers being cold. The only problem is of course you have to remove said gloves to use your phone when you’re out and that SUCKS.

You’re out with him one day and you’ve been texting back and forth with Mina because her and her girlfriend are in an argument and she of course comes to you about it.

You are always there for your friend so you’ve been removing and putting on your gloves over and over again until Katsuki can’t stand it anymore.

You’re outside on a bench waiting for him while he runs into some shop when he comes back out he snatches your phone out of your hand.

“What the hell? I’m usin-“ you start shouting at him.

“ give me those shitty gloves and put these on. I’m sick of watching you struggle.”

When you look down you see a pair of gloves in your favorite color.

“How are these any different from the ones I have now, Mr. Know-it-all”

He smirks at you, “These gloves are thicker than those thin ones you use AND they work on smart phones.. so yea. I do know it all.”

“Oh…. Well thanks I guess” you murmur lowly.

“Now you can talk Racoon eyes through her mental breakdowns without getting frost bite in your fingers.”he says then hands you back your phone. “She deserve better than that idiot anyways. Don’t why she keeps putting up with it.”

Katsuki is leaving for a mission today and you’ve been so gloomy. He gonna be gone at least 3 days, maybe even the whole week.

You’re been wrapped around him like ivy since you woke up this morning.

“Listen woman, I have to go. You do this every time.”he says with his arms wrapped around you waist pulling you even more flush against him.

“You should clone yourself or something. Who am I gonna cuddle with now?? And who is gonna cook for me?? I’ll die of starvation before you get back. Is that what you want. To come home to a dead girlfriend???”

“You are so damn dramatic. Cuddle with the damn plethor of plushies you have in my goddamn bed. And as far as food… you won’t starve. You’ll just eat out everyday and I’ll come back to you complaining you’ve gained weight when you look the exact same.”

“I do not.”, you start to object.

“Yes you do. Which is why I made a few meals and froze them.” He says all smug, cuz he knows that would surprise you.

“You what??” You ask looking up at him with wide eyes.

“There’s a pot pie and dumplings. I even stored a lasagna in there.” Then his phone buzzes letting him know his ride is downstairs.

“Ok I gotta go. I love you.” And he bends down to give you a deep kiss. “Be safe. Call Eiji if you need anything and try not to burn the house down before I get back.”

“I love you too. Come back to me in one piece please.”

He smiles at you, “always”

He kisses you one more time and then heads to the car.

You go directly to the fridge to see the frozen meals he left you. And not only are the packages all neatly but he’s left the heating instructions on top for you.

To say there were tears shed would be an understatement.

Katsuki Masterlist

Tags: @dreamcastgirl99 @xxvendettaxx @justbepeace @moonpieshawdy @theloveofnagiseishiroslife @mintsbubbletea @darkstarlight82 @anon-mouse223 @b134ch-m4h-ey3z @i-literally-cant-with-this @flowerbedbaby @kit-katsukii @blaize-hewwo @sweetblueworm @tippy-toes @superlegend216

Let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list in the comments💕

[marriedtobigfoot]

Part two of this story, where Robin discovers Steve’s type. A lot of people seemed interested in more, so here you go! 

The conversation doesn’t go quite the way Robin is expecting it. She’s fully prepared for Steve to launch into saying how confused he is because he’s feeling weird pants feelings for Eddie, but how does that work because he likes girls? She’s been mentally preparing herself for that exact discussion since she watched Eddie Munson call her best friend ‘Big Boy’ in the middle of committing grand theft auto. So when Steve starts talking, curled up on the gross linoleum tile of Family Video, she’s taken by surprise. She doesn’t even get the chance to answer his question before he’s throwing her prepared speech out the metaphorical window. 

“That’s stupid, you already told me that. Sharon Parker in the 5th grade, holding hands for Red Rover, blah blah blah, I know that. But like…Have you ever acted different around a girl, and then one day, you realize it’s because you like her? Like, you had a crush on a girl without even realizing it? Does that make any sense?” 

It takes Robin a second to reboot, but the second she manages, Steve throws her even further off track. 

“It’s just, Tommy H came by the other day, and he said some stuff that really has me thinking and-” 

Robin can’t stop herself. As soon as she hears a name other than Eddie Munson, she has a hand out covering Steve’s mouth. He gives her a look, surprised and confused. Maybe a little annoyed. She valiantly ignores him because what he just said has her head spinning, and she needs to put a stop to it right now. 

“Steve. My best friend in the whole universe. I’m here for whatever you need and whatever you might be figuring out about yourself. You know I’m going to support you 100% no matter what happens but…Please. PLEASE tell me that you didn’t just discover you have a crush on TOMMY H! He isn’t even your type, Steve! He isn’t even in the ballpark of your type! He’s so far off it’s honestly kind of laughable and-” 

Now it’s Steve who puts a hand over her mouth. 

“Jesus, Robin! First of all, gross. I’m not into Tommy, okay? Never gonna happen, not in a million years. And second, what the hell do you mean ‘my type?’ What the hell would you know about my type?” 

Robin carefully removes his hand from her face and shakes her head. She has absolutely no clue where this conversation is going, but there’s still a chance it can work its way somewhere good. Somewhere Munson-related. And she owes it to Steve to listen to his crisis properly. 

“Nevermind, forget that. What happened with Tommy?” 

“Okay well, he came over, like I said. He was super wasted, and I guess he and Carol broke up? And he started talking about when we were friends, and how he always used to try and get closer to me. He said he almost asked me if I wanted to practice kissing once? And he talked about like, trying to touch me all the time, trying to make me laugh? Basically saying he had a crush on me, which was super weird.” 

Robin nodded, because really, she had no idea what to say to that. 

“And then he kissed me. Which was kind of gross because he tasted like whisky and he was being all sloppy, like he wanted to eat my face. But…” 

“But?” 

“It wasn’t as gross as I would have expected I guess.” 

“I thought you said you didn’t like him!” 

“I don’t! It just, wasn’t a totally horrible kiss okay? Only a little horrible.” 

Robin sighed and let her head tip back against the wall. 

“Okay, I’m not seeing your dilemma yet. Tommy liking you and kissing you is kind of weird sure, but it doesn’t change anything about you.” 

Steve’s eyebrows furrowed, and he let out a puff of air. He looked small in this bathroom, scared in a way that Robin hated. They had faced down monsters, torture, long shifts with Keith. A conversation with his best friend should never have Steve looking that afraid, ever. 

She reached out and took his hand in her, giving it a gentle squeeze. 

“Hey, it’s okay Steve. Tell me what’s going on in that head.” 

“It’s just…Some of what Tommy said. About how he tried to get closer to me, to touch me and make me laugh and shit? I guess I realized that I’m doing that stuff. With somebody else. And if Tommy did it because he liked me then…” 

“You think it might mean you like this person. This…guy?” 

“Yeah. This guy.” 

There it was, the Eddie Munson of it all. Because Robin only knew of one guy that Steve spent his time with and would be trying to be touchy and close with. She had watched it happen with her own eyes, the way Steve would look for reasons to lean past Eddie, to put a hand on his shoulder, his back, once getting brave and putting a hand on his waist. She’d watched Eddie do the exact same things around Steve, too.

Part of her almost just comes out and tells Steve, that she knows who he’s talking about. Except he still looks unsure. He looks like he wants to throw up a little, and Robin has to fix that. 

“You know it’s okay right? For you to like this guy?” 

“I know. It’s just weird, to realize I might like him that way. Normally I can figure out when I’m into someone.” 

“Well, normally you aren’t friends with the people you’re into first. That makes it confusing.” 

“And I’m normally into people with boobies.” 

“That too.” 

Steve lets out a tiny laugh, and it makes Robin beam. Something about Steve is lighter now, like somethings been lifted off his chest, something that’s been there for a really long time without him knowing. She wants to tell him how much she’s loves him. How much she cares about him and supports him. She wants to tell him about all her research, and fully explain to him her findings when it comes to ‘his type.’ 

She wants to tell him that she knows the guy he likes is Eddie. That she thinks Eddie might like him too. 

The ‘ring for service’ bell ruins her chance at saying any of it. 

She and Steve both clamber off the floor, adjusting their vests before exiting the bathroom to greet whoever keeps ringing the stupid bell over and over again. Robin can’t decide if it’s the best luck in the world, or the worst, when it’s Eddie Munson himself standing at the counter. 

She leans towards best luck when she sees the way Steve’s cheeks go red.

A few people asked to be tagged if I did a part 2, so hopefully I do that right! I’ve got a few more parts planned, so if anybody else wants to be tagged let me know and I’ll do my best!

@kaiscove​ @wolfstarlights​  @awkwardgravity1​ @anonymousbandgirl​  @f1ct1onwh0re

[snghnlvr]

𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞. / park sunghoon

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫! (bff!jake makes an appearance!) • read part two !

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: you just wish you have the guts to say what you want, what you feel to your crush, park sunghoon.

𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐬 : 1.3k words | one sided crush | fluff at first then boom angst :0 | kind of made me sad actually | yn and sunghoon are friends!! | but hoon is a bit mean :< | this drabble was inspired by the song by niki :p

likes, comments and reposts are very much appreciated! <3

[below the cut]

you stared at the tall, handsome boy across the room. the room was twinkling whenever his cheek dimple appears when laughing, classmates’ eyes diverted whenever his eyes turn into crescent room, and classmates become temporary silent to hear his laughs.

ever since he stepped foot into your classroom from two years ago when he became a transferee, he grabbed the attention of female students and even staff board members. boys would gaze upon him whenever they pass by sunghoon with jealously visible in their faces.

i mean, who wouldn’t ?

you can’t deny either, he’s the most attractive person ever. in the classroom. in the school. in the world wide world.

his eyes would sometimes glance upon yours. when you both make eye contact, it would not last for even two seconds as you immediately look away. blush would run across your cheeks just by thinking about his gorgeous eyes looking at yours. you would nibble your bottom lip out of nervousness and overthink about your physical appearance.

did i look like an idiot? why is my lips so chapped? was my mascara smeared?

you questioned yourself multiple times in your head after walking home from school, how is he sculpted like the gods? why is he so handsome? why is he that perfect?

argh, just by thinking about it, unconsciously made your lips curl and heart beating like a rollercoaster. you shake your head to remove your thoughts about him and go home.

even though you’ve classmates with him for two years, you wanted to be closer. but you didn’t have the guts to do something. talk to him? pass him the notes the next day after being absent to take his ice skating lessons? buy him something? start a conversation? it’s too confusing.

you sighed infront of a locker. staring at it as if it would reply to you. well, you needed a quick response from whatever what you were doing. a wake up call.

you mentally marked it in your head.

locker #143 letter #12

god what were you doing?

writing letters to someone who barely notices you? how pathetic. you don’t even know what he thinks about you. does he know your name?

you were turning your body, ready to take off and think about sunghoon for the rest of the night. but before you take a step forward, you hear a familiar shout.

“y/n!”

you turned around and you see two figures, you recognized that one of them is your best friend, jake.

“oh hey jake!” you beamed at jake’s big smile towards you as he jogs towards you. your eyes then moved towards the figure behind him and your mind immediately blacked out.

it was sunghoon following behind jake. he saw you and smiled before going towards you as well.

“we were gonna eat tteokbokki at the restaurant across the street but we saw you~ it’s sooo cold so we wanted to eat something warm!” you can hear jake’s excitement through his tone as you saw him bundled up with his jacket and gloves. you noticed sunghoon’s attire. it was a simple hoodie with his fluffy jacket but yet he looked so cozy.

“wanna come with us?” jake invited. he stared at you with expectation.

“oh..” you mumbled under your breath. the sudden invitation made you hesitant because sunghoon will be there and you didn’t know how to act around him.

currently your heartbeat is echoing in your ears and you suddenly got cold sweat on your back despite it being winter.

you glanced to sunghoon behind jake as his hands were inside. he gently smiled at you as if he knew that you were wondering whether or not you’ll be a bother with them. he gave you a reassuring nod, mouthing, “don’t mind it”.

you swore your heart with jumping jackets. you swore sunghoon’s cheek dimple appeared when he smiled at you. you swore that sunghoon wanted you to be there with him.

“sure.” you breathe out. the heavy feeling on your chest disappeared with that one look of sunghoon’s eyes that spoke comfort and gentleness.

“yes!” jake jumped in excitement in his place. “we’re gonna go after sunghoon gets his scarf from his locket.” jake’s eyes moved towards sunghoon’s locker which was literally right next to you.

once again, your mind immediately blacked out. you panicked internally. not only sunghoon but your best friend will see your letter. you were the only one that knows that you like sunghoon. and you were scared that it might be obvious with how you’re acting.

you eyes looked over sunghoon’s hand unlocking his locker. you wanted to run away. you wanted to hide. you wanted to take back off the letters that you wrote in the past about him and forget everything. you can imagine yourself slapping yourself with your pillow.

but at the same time you were curious. will this be an opportunity to know what sunghoon thinks of you? does he likes the letters? does he know that it’s yours?

sunghoon huffed loudly which cut out of your thoughts.

“another one?” laced with disappointment.

your heart dropped at his reaction. you looked at jake beside you, his lips pursed in awkwardness.

you saw sunghoon stretch out his hand to grab the brown envelope. “hey y/n..” sunghoon turned to you.

your eyes widened, in fear if he knows. you gulped before responding to him. but your heart thumped that he said your name for the first time. that was a first for you.

“do you know this person?” he asked emotionless. eyes hoping that you know. you stared at the mini orange you’ve drew in the corner of the letter because you know he likes them; the drawing is humiliating you.

“no….” you tried to play if off cool, acting like you were thinking. sunghoon nodded when you responded.

“alright.”

jake bumped his elbow onto your shoulder. “sunghoon has been receiving love letters from the same person for the past month.”

“and it’s annoying.” sunghoon examined the brown envelope as if it was a disease. you can see the scowl on his face.

your heart swelled up at the contrast of his voice from earlier and his expression. his twisted eyebrows and puckered lips showed his frustration while looking at his name in the center of the envelope.

“it’s annoying?” you suddenly spoke, genuinely wondering why he would think of that but sunghoon nodded once again.

“tired of the same nonsense anyways. i won’t like someone who acts like this. i read the letters and laugh to myself because, how can someone be this delusional?” he snickered to himself as jake nodded, agreeing with him.

tears swelled up to your eyes as sunghoon looked down at the envelope, playing with it like a toy.

“acting like this? it’s a burdensome.”

did sunghoon indirectly called you a burden?

“if i meet this person, i won’t ever like them because i hate people like this.”

ouch.

that really did it.

“hey!” you suddenly made your voice loud, startling both of the boys.

jake panicked upon looking at you, your cheeks are pink, eyes watering and your lips were quivering.

sunghoon was alarmed with you. he was confused yet worried upon seeing your teary eyes. he was questioning what happened. he was gonna ask but you beat him to it.

you chuckled. “i forgot i-i have to help my mom with something. you guys can go without me-“ you cursed at yourself for your stuttering. “i’ll go! uh bye!” you smiled specifically at sunghoon with your teary eyes before dashing off.

idiot.

idiot.

idiot.

what sunghoon doesn’t know is that you like him.

what you don’t know is that sunghoon likes you as well. he was the one that initiated eating tteokbokki with you.

(jake would leave midway as apart of sunghoon’s plan)

-

this is my first tumblr post! i have a lot of drabbles in my notes app but i decided to post this one first because it’s completely done. what did you guys think? do you think sunghoon will know yn’s likeness towards him? will yn stop with the letters? i don’t know if i have a part two in mind but please let me know if you want! 😼 thank you for reading <3

[aiizenn]

his spark. eren jeager.

ₓ˚. ୭ cw: physical therapist fem!reader, mmafighter!eren, somewhat mean!eren, nsfw, p in v, rough intercourse, slight fingering, pet names, cussing, use of word daddy once, tiny aftercare at the end

૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა thought about this after reading the manhwa jinx for the umpth time. mma fighter eren makes me feel some type of way.

eren: locker room at 8:45 exact. don’t be late.

of course he’s texting you minutes right before a match, it’s always been like this. you gather your equipment from the passengers side as you get out your car. he could’ve at least texted an hour ago, not fifteen minutes before the time he demanded. his locker room is a good twenty minute walk, he’s going to pissed.

8:52 pm

you’re in-front of his door, mentally and somewhat physically preparing yourself. you barely get the chance to knock as eren swings the door open and drags you inside.

“you’re seven minutes late, doll face.”

oh, he’s angry.

“yeah, well maybe if you’d texted me in advance i wouldn’t be late” you bark at him. yeah, you accepted to be his spark, drug, boost, or motivation before every one of his matches but you had things to do and places to be. and he knew that, but he didn’t care. the moment he needs you, you must drop everything and attend him, that was the “deal”.

“watch your tone, pretty girl. don’t get feisty with me now, you are in no position.” he says in a low voice, and you scoff in response turning your head away. he grabs your chin and makes you face him. he leans in close and whispers, “shall we put that mouth to better use?” not seconds later he puts his lips on yours, devouring you like a starved man. one hand on your neck pulling you in, whilst the other roams around the hem of your uniform top. slowly, he slides his hand under your top until he reaches your breasts.

“hmm, no bra tonight?” smirking in between kisses. “why wear one when it’ll just end up on the floor, right?” you say, all breathy. “panties?” “all wet just for you” fuckkk, he’s loosing it. he removes your top, taking you in. shit, you’re breathtaking. his lips head straight to your neck, and starts sucking…hard. that’s definitely leaving a mark. his head dips lower to your collarbone and bites the area. aaagh. he heads back to kissing your lips, while placing his knee between your thighs.

“hmm, yes doll face, they’re wet indeed. and all jus’ for me.” he moans. “so fuckin’ pretty, such a good slut for me”

you whimpered at that, needing more, you start to move against his knee. “aw, you want more? brats don’t get what they want…you have to deserve it” he starts pinching your nipples. he looks at you, enjoying every second of your reaction. he removes one hand from your breast and moves it up to your mouth. “suck” he demands, and you do. you sucked on them like your life depended on it. “such a good brat” he says as he removes your bottom uniform.

a clear, big wet spot right in the middle of the material. he smirks, proud of himself and you. eren removes his fingers from your mouth and wipes your lips. then places them on top of your wet spot, making small circles. the pace of his movements were pure torture. you whimper, asking for more. a playful laugh escapes his lips as he removes your panties. exposing your pussy completely to the cold air.

“you look just about good enough to eat.” you get turned on more by his statement. “but we’ll leave that for some other time” he says while palming himself. he inserts the fingers you sucked on without warning, and you feel pure bliss. “look at that, all loose and ready.” he plays a bit, fingering you, hard. once done he takes out his cock. god, he’s big. you still can’t understand how that fits inside you. he strokes his cock before placing the tip to your entry. seconds pass before he rams into you. you place your arms around him, digging your nails into his broad back.

“this is what you wanted” he groaned. slamming in and out of you, the sound of skin slapping filling the room. he picks you up while he’s inside, you get tighter with the movements. your pussy wrapping around him, sucking him in so nicely making him go feral. he wants to make a mess out of you. he thrusts in and out so hard, making you see stars.

“yess, just like that” you moaned. your breathy moans encourage eren to go faster and harder. loud whimpers and moans left your lips, causing eren to groan. “gotta keep it down, pretty girl. don’t want the others to hear how dirty of a cum slut you are, right?” you can’t think straight. you want to kiss him. you move your hands up from his shoulders to his neck, pulling him closer for a kiss. and he kisses you. “eren, i-i cant…tis too much please.” “you can take it, you’ve done it before, cmon. be a good girl” “just a little more.” soon after he pushes you against a cold wall, adding more pleasure.

“em close…fuckk eren so close” you scream. “beg for it” he demands as he sucks on your neck. “please, p-please, daddy lemme cum, i’ve been a good slut.” “fuckk pretty girl, where do you want it?” “mouth, please” he places you gently on the bench and slides out of you, stroking himself as he lets out his hot, thick cum. with your mouth wide open, you get every drop.

“swallow. all of it.” and you do. he grabs your chin and kisses your lips, tasting himself on you. “you did so well.” he praises you. “that felt more like a reward than a punishment to me” you say out of breath. he smirks and he cleans himself….just wait until after the match, he thought. he grabs a warm towel and cleans you up, the famous cold beast—eren jeager—can be soft, feeling happy that only you know this side of him. the soft yet mean looking man gets up and checks the time.

9:10 pm

“looks like we finished right on time, pretty girl. sticking around for the match?”

“of course, wouldn’t want to miss my hard work.” you said with a smug look on your face. he scoffs as he dips down enough to kiss your forehead. “you mean our hard work” eren says as he winks at you. “mine” you reply with a toothy grin. eren shakes his head with a smile on his face. at that, he leaves the room with confidence, ready to win the match and certainly, he does, paying off your hard work.

[star-hoon]

VERSION OF ME — (p. sunghoon)

"CAN YOU LOVE THE VERSION OF ME, I DON'T LET ANYBODY ELSE SEE?"

— MASTERLIST

pairing: sunghoon x fem reader (oneshot)

includes/warnings (16+):  comfort/healing from dark past! au — fluff, angst, profanity, comfort, implied reader has scars, mentions of food/eating  (let me know if i missed anything!)

word count: 1.8k [not proofread]

synopsis: you and sunghoon have been dating for a few months now and he is the definition of your prince charming. but you are finally forced to uncover what you've been hiding from him, and it makes you fear you’ll lose him.

DISCLAIMER: this fic does mention/imply reader has SH scars. it is mentioned without detail and sunghoon is comforting reader about them. *as someone who used to SH, i would never ever mean to trigger anyone. so if this could potentially trigger you, do not read/please proceed with caution.*

author’s note: omg thank you to everyone who read my 'obsessed' & 'intermission' AND for over 110 followers!

i hope you're all okay with this fic idea even its a little on the darker side. but i promise its fluffy n hoon is a sweetie. this one is dedicated to all of you out there who have overcome hardships in the past or dealing with hardships right now, with physical or mental scars. you are so strong, beautiful, and loved!! <3

VERSION OF ME SOUNDTRACK

it was yet the end of another long and arduous day at work. you dragged your feet into the doorway of your apartment, hanging up your bag on the hook in the entry way and removing your shoes that you could feel were forming blisters on your heels.

sighing, you make a beeline to your bedroom. nothing sounded better than a hot shower to change into some comfy clothes. well, maybe one thing sounded better.

cuddling with your boyfriend sunghoon. and his deep voice and hearty laugh. and his silly puns and dad jokes. and him getting so excited talking about film cameras. just—him.

you had never been one to be very clingy nor dependent with your boyfriends. you just valued your own time and pursuing your own goals, but that doesn't mean you care about them any less.

that's why when you and sunghoon started dating 4 months ago, you felt something click in that regard. he fully understood your introverted ways and wouldn't be like the previous guys and complain about feeling 'neglected' or that you were too cold because he knew exactly how it felt to need alone time/your own space and he respected it.

but even still, when you are together he treats you like an absolute princess. carrying your purse for you when you go shopping, opening the car door for you, standing on the side of the sidewalk that faces the street. he also emotionally cared for you, listening to you rant about things big and small and always reassuring you the day before you have a big presentation at work. you felt so deeply cared for and understood, it made your affection for him blossom even more every day.

today was a day that both you and sunghoon had busy schedules so you weren't going to see each other. but you missed him and wanted nothing more than his comforting presence to fill your currently empty apartment.

you made your way to the bathroom, removing your uncomfortable work clothes. as you stood there uncovered you caught sight of yourself in the mirror. you stared down at your arms, the dark marks that littered your skin. you knew you couldn't hide this from him forever.

before you could let any more negative thoughts consume you, you hopped into the shower hoping the hot water can wash away your stress and worries.

after your shower that probably lasted a little too long in some water that was probably a little too hot, you heard a knock at your front door. you peeked to the corner of your phone amidst the tik tok scrolling 10:38 pm.

considering how late it was you were suspicious so you tiptoed to the front door, glancing through the peep hole. it was sunghoon. even though you should feel giddy and excited at the sight of your boyfriend, a twinge of panic arose. you were just wearing a tshirt so your arms were fully exposed, not expecting company. you ran and grabbed the first hoodie you could find. it happened to be one of his.

you opened the front door and there sunghoon stood as handsome as ever, with a bouquet of flowers and a takeout bag. you pouted at the sight in front of you—you were the luckiest girl alive. this was exactly what you needed after a day like today.

"hi hoonie" you softly greeted him, gently hugging him and he leaned down to give you a peck on the cheek. "...what's all this?"

he spoke as he took off his shoes and made his way into the kitchen. "sorry for dropping by so suddenly, i knew weren't planning on seeing each other today but i knew you had a long day and you were gonna be home late so i thought you would want some food. it's your favorite from the restaurant downtown." you nearly started crying, how could be so sweet?

"don't be sorry. thank you, you are seriously the best hoon i missed you a lot today."

"i missed you too. just sit and relax baby, i'll plate everything up for you" sunghoon always insisted on plating food even if it was takeout. he believed it made it taste better, the notion always made you laugh.

despite offering to split the meal with him, he insisted he didn't want any saying he ate dinner earlier. but as you two sat at the dining table chatting about your day, you fed him forkful after forkful anyways.

after finishing the meal you convinced sunghoon to let you wash the dishes. he eventually complied, standing next to you at the sink drying the 3 total dishes you had to wash.

no matter how small the gesture sunghoon was willing to do anything and everything to make it easier for you. you were convinced he came straight out of a fairytale—but your fantasy was going to come crashing down.

"y/n...why do you never roll up your sleeves when you wash the dishes? they're gonna get all wet!" his tone playful.

"i-its fine hoon, these are just a few dishes anyways" you try force a small laugh as a chill runs down your spine.

"come on sweetheart lemme roll 'em up for you..."

"i said it fine-"

his hand reaches towards your sleeves, pulling them up your arm slightly. you reflexively move away from him, your mind went into overdrive.

"SUNGHOON STOP! I SAID IT'S FINE!" your arm harshly shoved his body away from yours, the glass you were holding flying out of your hand. the sound of the glass shattering on the kitchen floor seemed to echo in the room.

silence fell between you two. your eyes wide and brimming with tears, your chest heaving from your heavy breathing. all you could was cup your hands over your mouth, your eyes looking at the broken glass a few feet away from you and then to your boyfriend. his expression made you sick. he has never looked at you this way. you couldn't tell if he was scared, angry, sad. it didn't matter.

"hoon i-i'm so so sorry, i didn't mean to push you. fu-fuck the glass i'm sorry i'll clean it up" large streams of tears flowed down your cheeks and you managed to get the sentence out in between sobs.

you felt yourself spiraling. you dropped to your knees and crawled towards the broken glass. the sight of the the pieces blurry from your tears and you picked up the pieces with your hands and putting the shards in your palm.

sunghoon was more confused than angry at you, it all happened so fast he barely had time to react. but seeing you pick up the shards of glass with your bare hands snapped him back to reality. he dropped down in front of you on the floor.

"baby stop! what're you doing?! you'll hurt yourself" his voiced laced with concern. he put a hand on your arm and cupped the side of your face with his other hand, wiping the tears away with him thumbs.

you couldn't stop the tears from escaping you. you couldn't believe what you just did. sunghoon was just trying to do a sweet, innocent gesture for you and in the end you hurt him. you didn't deserve him. you knew you couldn't hide it from him forever but you didn't think it would all end like this.

he leaned his forehead to yours, searching to meet your eyes. you just couldn't look at him.

"please y/n, what's going on?" his eyes wide and he pleaded for an answer. catching your breath after what felt like countless sobs, you gently placed the shards back on the floor.

"i need to tell you something hoon."

you followed sunghoon's order to meet in your room as he swept up the broken glass. you sat on your bed as you prepared how you were going to explain all of this.

you didn't want to lose him. he was the best thing that has ever happened to you. all you could imagine was his mortified or disgusted face when he sees your arms. the thought made all your tears resurface. sunghoon sat down next to you on your bed.

"i'm sorry for pushing you hoon. i shouldn't have done that." you took a deep breath before continuing.

"i-i've been hiding something from you since we met. i knew i couldn't h-hide it forever, but i never knew how or when to tell you." you didn't know what else to say to explain. you silently pulled up the sleeves of his hoodie you were wearing.

your arms illuminated by the lamp on your bedside table. silent tears ran down your face as you exposed yourself to him. you have never felt so vulnerable, bare, and scared in your entire life.

"sunghoon i-" before you could say anything else, he pulled you into a silent embrace. one hand pushing your waist to be flush against him, and the other to the nape of your neck.

you eventually muster up the courage to pull away to look up at him. silent tears flowed down sunghoon's cheeks. your eyes widened, sunghoon never cried. your lip quivered at the sight. it was your turn to wipe the tears from his cheek as he did for you earlier.

"um i don't really know what else to say but this explains why i've always covered up my arms around you, why i never was intimate with you...even though i really really wanted to..." you let out a chuckle through your cries trying to lighten the mood.

"...i-i'm sorry i'm such a mess. i know you probably didn't want this going into the relationship. i just- i'm so sorry hoon... i get it if this too much for you."

"you don't have anything to be sorry for y/n..." he grabbed your hand to lace it together with his.

"...this is definitely not an easy thing to share. it just breaks my heart to see someone so kind, smart, and beautiful could do this to herself" he kissed your lips, one of his salty tears landed on your lips.

he used your currently intertwined hands to lift up your arms, placing gentle yet tender kisses to each mark on your arms, your breath hitching at his every touch. this was the first time anyone has been so close, seen you at the most vulnerable. and yet he is treating you like you are made of porcelain.

"this isn't too much y/n. i still think you are the most beautiful person i've ever met—inside and out. this is just a reminder or how strong you are and you overcame whatever you faced in the past. i hope one day you can open up and confide in me because i'm here for you baby. through the good and the bad, especially the bad. because i love you."

your heart melted at his comforting and sincere words, now shedding tears of joy.

"i-i love you too hoon, thank you"

taglist (open!): @laylasbunbunny @blackberryrains

ramblings: this made me so soft and healed my past self 🥺 would you guys like to see more full fics/series or oneshots like this?

thank you so much for reading, please let me know what you think <3

reblogs, likes, & comments are always appreciated!!

[candy69gurl]

Drink Dalliance

‎

Shiu Kong x f!reader

18+, dark, dub/con, use of alcohol, age gap, clit rubbing, pussy eating, raw sex Collab with @prashanddash

“Pretty lady, can I get you a drink?” Shiu chuckled

You bit your lower lip before replying, "I mean, if you want."

He noticed the lip bite and raised an eyebrow. He’s used to women wanting to gain something from him using their bodies, so he gave her a once-over.

“I think you want more than just a drink.”

You raised an eyebrow at him and said, "Hmm?"

He grinned. He’s seen this look before; it’s as if she’s trying to act innocent while being the opposite.

“I know what you want; you think that because I look serious and uptight, it would make you the dominant one in this situation.”

You laughed, trying to lighten up the situation.

With a wave of his hand, he would snap his fingers to get the bartender’s attention. “A drink for my lovely lady; she prefers it to be something on the fruity side, I’m assuming?" He chuckled before turning back to you.

"Yes, I'd like that,"  you said, resting your head on one arm on the counter.

A simple wave to the bartender is all he needed to get the drink ordered for her.

When the drink eventually arrived, he handed it to her, watching her as he blew some smoke to his side.

“So, what’s a beautiful lady such as yourself doing here today?”

"I am so bored with life." 

Seeing her bored puts a smile on his face. This is right in his ballpark; he’s dealt with much harder situations and people; this is a cake walk.

He took another drag off his cigarette.

“A pretty girl is bored? No boyfriend around?” He said it in a mock-surprised tone.

"Not really"

He let out a small chuckle; he knew that answer was coming.

“Well, it must be really hard being single, especially for someone as young and beautiful as yourself.”

"I know right."  You took a few sips.

He let out a grunt of amusement. She's taking the drink and conversation just exactly how he thought she would. The ball is in his court, and he'll only let it go if he wants it too.

He smoked his cigarette casually, his gaze following her as she took her sips.

“You must have plenty of guys that would try and hit on you every day, right?”

"What do you think?"

“It's either they are just too shy, or maybe they just don’t think they have a shot?”

"I don't know, I am so tired," you sighed, resting your head on the counter.

He let out a small hum as he watched you rest your head. He kept up his calm demeanour, but inside, it’s as if he knew he had you at his mercy.

He then leaned back on his stool and kept watching.

“Tired, huh?”

He’s quiet for a short moment.

“So, are you out for a night out drinking alone? Or did you come here with friends?”

"Alone"

“Oh, so you actually decided to head out and drink by yourself? It's quite brave of you, don’t you think? You’re a pretty girl, and you come out alone to a bar. It’s like you want to get hit on.”

He said it definitely feels like he’s teasing you at this point. He leaned towards you, removing strands of hair from your face.

Your breathing stopped for a moment as you observed his hand movements. "And why are you here?"

“Me?” He said it with slight amusement. “I just came out to get a drink and look who caught my eye.”

He chuckled as he leaned back on his stool, still keeping a firm gaze on you.

“So, are you going to tell me your name? Or let me guess it.”

"Y/N,"  you replied instantly without letting him finish the full sentence.

“Pretty name,” he said, giving a smile before quickly catching himself.

“You can call me Shiu, by the way.”

"Shiu.. mhm"

He was looking at you, taking in your features. He’s definitely noticing everything about you, trying to mentally put the pieces together behind your looks.

“Hey. Are you alright? It looks like alcohol has gotten into your cerebellum, huh?”

You nodded, looking at him with a hazy gaze.

“You’re so quiet, aren’t you? I bet you like when others take control, huh?”

He smirked. He’s got you figured out already, or at least this is what he’s letting on.

"Depends on my mood,"  you replied in a teasing tone.

“Hm. And what kind of mood are you in right now?” He asked, leaning forward slightly. He knew exactly how to push your buttons; he'd seen girls like you before.

You smiled, blushing, still resting your head on the counter. "You're feisty, aren't you?"

He gave you a smirk as he watched you blush. He's so close to what he wanted; he just needs to make a few more moves, and the game is his.

"A little bit," he says back, keeping a smug look on his face.

You get up to regain your original position. "I like it."

"Oh, you do?” He said, grinning, watching her move. He’s keeping his cool, but inside he’s getting a bit more worked up. He’s seen this game played, and he’s confident that soon he’ll have her in the palm of his hands.

“So, would you like to get another drink?” His voice has a bit of a seductive quality to it now, and he’s definitely turning that flirtiness up to a higher level.

"Mhm, I'd like a martini,"  you replied, licking your bottom lip.

Without saying a word, he waved his hand, getting the bartender’s attention. He ordered the martini, which got delivered pretty fast.

He then slid the drink over to her when it arrived; he did so with a smirk, and it looked as if he'd been trying to read her expression the whole time.

“You are already so drunk. You should not drink anymore,” he added, his smirk never leaving his face as he kept teasing his prey.

"You keep offering me, and who's going to turn down some free shots?"

He gave you another grin as he watched you bite your lip.

"Oh, of course, I too can't turn down free shots," he said mockingly, his smirk never leaving his face as he leaned up. "But I also don't think someone like you should be getting any more drunk than you are right now," he added. He's playing this to the very end.

"And why do you think that?"

"If you get any more drunk, I may end up taking you home with me," he said, that smirk still never leaving his face.

"Take me,"  you replied, pouting and tilting your head to the side.

He let out a scoff at how easy she was playing into his hands.

"Both ways?" he asked smugly.

You smiled sheepishly and said, "Yes."

He leaned up slightly and offered his hand.

"Well, then, shall we head out?"

"Then follow me," he said as he got up from his stool and headed out of the bar. He grabbed her hand and helped her off her stool, keeping a tight grip before nodding to the bartender, and he lead her out of the bar, a light smirk on his lips as he watched her. He's getting everything he wanted.

You both stumbled out of the club, hands urgently exploring each other's bodies as yall made your way to his apartment. The anticipation hung thick in the air, a heady mix of need and longing that threatened to consume them both. Once inside, you both wasted no time, clothes discarded in a frenzy of desire.

Shiu pushed you against his appartment wall, his hands roaming greedily over your curves. You moaned softly, arching into his touch as he teased your sensitive skin. And then, his fingers brushed against the smooth, bare skin of your thighs, then to your clad clit

A moan escaped your lips as you grinned wickedly, your eyes smoldering with desire. He took no time to take off your panties. He teased your clit and your entrance which was which was already glistening due to wetness.

"Fuck," Shiu groaned, his desire spiking at the sight of your bare and ready for him. Without hesitation, he dropped to his knees, his lips trailing hot, wet kisses up your inner thighs. You gasped, your fingers tangling in his hair as he teased your, his tongue flicking lightly against your throbbing clit.

You were dripping with need, your body trembling with anticipation as he finally buried his face between your legs. You cried out, your back arching off the wall as he lapped at your hungrily, his mouth hot and insistent against your sensitive flesh.

"Please," you begged, your voice a desperate plea as you rocked your hips against his mouth, needing more, needing him inside you.

Your hands tried to take off your dress as his tongue plunged into your hole. As you were near, he leaned back and stood up, towering over you.

"Not gonna let you cum now", he kissed you letting you taste yourself on his tongue, his hand easily slided off your dress, freeing your breasts and your nipples got hard immediately. He grabbed your hair tilting your head, exposing your neck to his gaze. He sucked your neck hard, enough to leave marks, your continuous moans song to his ear as he his tongue brushed down your neck to your breasts, latching on to your breast while one of his hand squeezed the other nipple and his other hand reached your clamping folds.

He inserted his finger, your body shook through his invasion.

"Please I want- I have to cum."

"Don't worry baby, you get to cum on my cock"

And he scooped you in his arms and took you to his bedroom, laying you on the bed, he lined himself up with your entrance.

With a primal growl, Shiu thrusted into your, the exquisite sensation of being filled to the brim making your cry out in ecstasy. He moved in a wild, frenzied rhythm, the sound of your moans mingling with the slap of skin on skin. You were close, so close, your body on the edge of oblivion as he pounded into your relentlessly. And then, with a cry of your name on his lips, you shattered around him, your walls clenching tight around him as you rode out your orgasm.

Shiu slowed his thrusting, grunting by the way your pussy milked him. His orgasm followed soon after, hips jerking erratically as he spilled himself inside your, your bodies locked togetyour in a passionate embrace. He clung to each you, as you tremble. The aftershocks of your and his climax rippled through.

Breathless and sated, he sank to the bed next to you in a tangled heap of limbs and desire, your bodies still humming with the echoes of their passion.

"Gon' make you my wife", he planted a small kiss on your temple as you passed out on his bed.

[hollyhomburg]

Before I Leave You (Pt. 56)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: In the wake of Namjoon’s rut you and Hobi try to get yourself back on even footing, if only his co workers weren’t so...creepy towards you. 

Tags: Depression, anxiety, ptsd, hurt/comfort, fluff, excessive babying, courting, omegaspace, mommy kink, Mommy! Tae, nipple play, m/c sucks on tae’s tits for mental health reasons, Non-detailed sexual content, mentioned omegaspace sex, discussions of past abuse, discussions of mental health issues, eating disorder recovery, implied self-harm

W/c: 9.7k

A/N: LISTEN, i know the nipple play stuff might not be everyone’s cup of tea, but it reads very comforting if you’re willing to give it a chance. That being said it may go further into the realm of mommy kink than some of you are willing to go and toes the line into extreme kink as it highly sexualizes Tae’s brests and the m/c in omegaspace. It's not really nursing per say cuz there isn’t any milk involved, but the m/c does suck on tae’s breasts to soothe herself.  

I tried to make it as ‘skippable’ as possible it’s under the section ‘Tae, sometime at night’  I firmly encourage you to skip it if you feel the need too.

Previous Chapter - Masterlist

(16 days post rut. The day after Halloween, Yoongi)

Yoongi lets out an inhuman screech. 

He’s holding his sweater in his hands, nude from the waist up interrupted by his changing. Staring at you open-mouthed while Jungkook rolls in the remnants of your nest. Remnants- because you honestly hadn't put it together much after Namjoon's rut. 

You’ve been spending the last few weeks slowly bringing everything upstairs, alternating between sleeping spots, not a single one of them still feels right.  The pack had kept their mattress in the living room, but yours they'd moved back. Last night you spent your first night upstairs with Jimin, Jungkook, and Tae. Four pups all cute and nesty with the rest of the Halloween candy between the three of you in multicolored bowls. 

Yoongi had gotten to watch as you all giggled and completely abused the projector he’d installed for a movie night of the Addams family and some horror movie that you'd changed in the first 15 minutes. 

There are more and more moments where he gets to appreciate his hard work these days and he savors them whenever he can. He’d been a little worried that the bed would be too big or too small but it looks just the right size. Just enough space for the others. 

After you’d fallen asleep, he’d carefully tiptoed around you and removed the bowls of candy, kissing each of your heads like a special spell to guard your dreams against monsters and cousin it. 

Now Jungkook grins up from the last little bit of the nest that’s still down here, hugging a pillow to his chest, “I knew something happened.” It’s not often Yoongi squeaks, like a cat suddenly picked up, heart all in a tizzy just thinking about it.

“What do you mean you and Hobi kissed? And you didn’t tell me!?”

You go red ear to ear, “It wasn’t-I don’t even think he meant to do it- it wasn’t like a kiss kiss-“

“Ahh,” Jungkook drags out the syllable. Reaching for your hand and tugging you to sit. Closer, because Jungkook’s wandering fingers have half a mind of their own. You look so good- have been honestly glowing a bit since Namjoon’s rut, something about the health of you that makes him want to touch more and more. 

His fingers dig into the meat of your thighs appreciatively and you squirm away, “Heat of-the-moment kisses are so hot- not to mention first kisses.”

Yoongi sits on the edge of the bed. Knees pulled together. “Tell me everything.”

Yoongi has always been terribly involved in your dating life in the beginning you'd gushed to him about every new kiss. The ones with Jk, a memory now as he drags his mouth up your waist, resting his cheek against the curve of your hips and smiling up at you. The one with Tae in that dressing room, your first soft moments with Jin and Namjoon. Everything. The fact that he hadn't heard about this one immediately after the fact stings only a little,

The rest is clouded over with excitement.  

Hobi had initiated kisses. He’d been the one to break first.  

Yoongi remembers how their relationship began with coyly phrased jabs said over dusty records not long after he'd broken up with his last pack and moved in. When they’d gone from best friends to sort of roommates and started spending almost every minute together. 

Yoongi liked Hoseok. Just liked him. Liked seeing him smile. Heart skipping beats and saving them for him. Spending hours standing just far enough apart with some sleazy jazz playing over the loudspeakers and Hobi’s lips all mischievous. Their first kiss hanging there, on the edge, just where Yoongi could see it but not have it just yet. Teasing him endlessly. 

"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were flirting with me Hoseok," 

"You'll know when I'm flirting hyung." 

Hobi had turned off the jazz and turned on Yoongi’s favorite music instead and Yoongi had been substantially wooed just by that. 

Hobi had been shy with the rest of the pack. Freer with Yoongi he said, because he always knew where he stood with him. Not like with the other alphas where Hobi had to worry about showing his throat or not- or Jungkook and Jin- where he had to worry if he has too dominant or not dominant enough. Their firsts had felt truly new, untied of expectations. Just loving. None of the other stuff. 

Sometimes, Hobi still feels this way. 

Now Yoongi watches you and knows how it feels, the way your eyelashes flutter as you look down and away, flopping back against the nest scent going sweet with the memory of it. "I bet it was so hot-" Koo chimes kicking his feet when he rolls onto his tummy and continues to pinch at your thighs, hand sliding up gradually under your baggy pajama shorts. Tickling the hairs there.

 "Hobi’s such a good kisser too-“ The omega swoons and your belly swoops at the sound. 

Yoongi licks his lips, trying not to think of it.

"It wasn't hot, it wasn't anything-" But the blush on your cheeks tells a different story. You groan, hiding your face in your hands. "I shouldn't have said anything." Yoongi gently pries your hands away from your face. His heart is racing a mile a minute like it's his first kiss and not yours. 

"Even if it was something, I’d still be happy sweetheart.” 

You bite your cheek; I just want to know if he regrets it. “I can’t ask him about it or I’ll make it weird.” You whine.

Jungkook’s fingers press into your chin, he looks awfully devilish, hair damp from a shower, his classes for the day passed. “You’ve been thinking about it a lot. That’s why you’ve been so quiet.”

You flush, but not for the reason he thinks. 

The truth is you’ve been spending a lot more time on your own these days, painting the back-room space and finding excuses to head upstairs when everyone’s home, or downstairs when everyone goes up. There’s no reason. You tell yourself there’s no reason but-

Sometimes it’s hard, being sad without a cause. A gnawing emptiness like there's no point in enjoying anything anyways when sooner or later the rug will be yanked out from underneath you. A sense of a foreshortened future. An end that is simultaneously ridiculous to consider and yet nearby like a shadow in the corner of your eye that isn't there- not really. 

Maybe it would be easier if you and Yoongi weren’t mated yet, and you’d have had that to look forward to. You’ve been thinking about mating marks a lot recently. Spending long hours looking at yours in the mirror, fingers hovering over the glass when you pull back blocking out parts of it with your fingertips. The parts that Geumjae left that you’ll never be able to quite get rid of. 

You asked Jin about his and Namjoon’s the other day- but the omega had only sighed and told you not to worry about it.  

You eagerly snap up the excuse handed to you now. It's better having them assume than explaining the real reason to them. For the most part, they believe you. Like there isn’t that taught line of something running through you like the very essence of you wants to snap. A discomfort at being happy.

A feeling like maybe, you don't deserve it.

If there is anything you deserve it’s certainly not Hobi’s smile when he comes home and asks you if you’ll help him move a few more plants in from outside. “You’ve got a good eye” he tells you. “I swear without you and Tae this place would look like a bachelor pad”

Hobi hasn’t been avoiding you since the rut but maybe it would be easier if he was.

He’s no less likely to ask you for late-night car rides, no less likely to bump shoulders with you playfully over dishes or offer you his headphone when he found you dozing two nights ago on the outdoor furniture. Your big blue blanket wrapped tight around your shoulders to keep out the fall chill. 

He’d even accepted you when you held back the edge for him to get under. The warmth from his body trapped by it and transferred to yours as you talked. Mostly about Hobi’s job; his plans to leave early and help manage a specialty order from the city; nearly three thousand burgundy roses for a fall wedding. 

“How do you even fit that many into a car?”

“Very, very carefully”  

Last night as the pack had handed out Halloween candy, He’d been giggly and close. Eager to pick your favorite candy out of the bowl of bulk-bought candy bars and set them aside for you. He’d even given you a pair of little devil ears, similar to the halo on Tae’s head, a vision in a light pink dress that she’d been just itching to wear. The only one truly dressed up, the only one with the energy to go all out.

The fabric was soft and silky with cutouts for her body, which had you looping your hands around her waist at every available opportunity and maybe kissing places hidden when you’d helped her undress later, hands sneaking underneath the fabric just to touch. 

No one had time to plan their outfits or decorate the house because of Namjoon’s rut. You improvised with eyeliner lined and drawn whiskers on Yoongi’s cheeks, grumbling half-heartedly as Tae dotted his nose with bright pink blush and attached a pair of cat ears to his head. 

The one person who hadn’t escaped Hobi’s costumes was Noddle, hissy in his little black and yellow bee costume, you’d given him tuna as a special treat. The neighborhood kids had ooohd and ahhed at him in the window, grumpily guarding your house from any intruders. 

It’s funny, noodle only hisses at the people dressed up as other cats. 

Independent from your musings, your packmates hover on the edge of the bed. “who says you can’t ask him? Just talk to him-“ Yoongi tries to convince you.

"We can ask him for you!" Both of them pop up, their eyes all wide, matching black heads all fuzzy, your mate bobs his head, the picture of polite eagerness.

"Oh fuck no- You'll do no such thing-" 

“Come on, let us play matchmaker with you."

A loud ring interrupts your conversation, coming from deep within the confines of your nest. It’s Yoongi's phone- discarded. Jungkook grins as he answers for him, smirking all the while. 

"Hyung! We were just talking about you- No it's fine, Joonie forgot his lunch too-" Jungkook playfully shoves away Yoongi’s hand reaching for his phone. He pauses as Hobi says something on the other line. 

Jungkook’s grin is nothing if not scheming. 

"Yoongi's busy right now," he licks his lips, eyes on you. Yoongi is certainly not busy, the only thing he had planned for today was bringing Namjoon his lunch, another stop is hardly too much.  

"But Y/n's free, I’ll have her drop it off. Bye, hyung. Love you too hyung."  

~-~

Hobi is drawn to the front room of the flower shop because it’s his break time, someone forgot the last box of roses out back, and also because one of his coworkers is shouting again. 

It's a semi-normal occurrence by any standard of measurement, but still, the sound of his shrill voice shouting in protest is just as grating as the feeling of dirt under Hobi’s fingernails. 

They're sensitive and pricked too, he's spent the better part of the morning prepping the red roses, bundles, and bundles of them. The last one 

He pauses, ignoring the commotion for as long as he can to take a sip of water, The cold drips down his throat, soothing the heat there.  It might be cold at night but the lot out back is still unforgiving in the autumn sunlight, the occasional breeze telling stories of knit blankets and cozy sweatpants that Hobi will need within the month. He can’t wait for it to get colder. 

The flower shop is structured in layers. The breakroom with the cubbies, a dilapidated old fridge, and a small table directly off the lot. A narrow hallway connects it first to the stock room and then to the counter and the retail space out front. The commotion comes from the stock room. The sound of a box falling over with a loud clang and then the softer sound of people arguing in hushed tones. 

Three of his coworkers- two of which are the same ones who don't like him- shove each other to get through the door. One holding around the other middle.

"No, I've got this one-" Hobi stoops to pick up a roll of orange-red ribbon, half unrolled on the dusty floor. 

"Come on- I took the granny for you this morning you owe me-"

"You're an omega, Felix."

"So? Like being a horndog is a uniquely alpha affliction?"

"Too late!" The third one darts through the door. Unencumbered by the other's scuffle. Tossing a kiss over his shoulder at the other two. Their frustrated groans resounding a hissed whisper. "Chan! You've already got an omega you don't need two-”

At his appearance, both of his coworkers straighten up. "What’s all the fuss about?" he asks with a tired sigh. Not that he really wants to make conversation with them about what client they're thirsting over this week. Hobi has never joined in with them, their near-running commentary on who comes into the shop. 

“A pretty client.” It's nothing new, but what is new is the way that Hyunjin rolls his eyes and scoffs.

"Pretty is not a word reserved for the hottest omega I’ve seen this year- she looks like Kate Moss and Zendaya had a love child with an angel-" he swoons, Hobi sighs and pushes through them to put the ribbon back on its holder. They probably knocked it off in their scuffle, his two coworkers practically fall through the door after him.

Hobi blinks.

It's just you, standing in the doorway looking at the hanging epiphytes and other little suncatchers that hand in the flower shop windows. You’re wearing one of Tae's big sweaters that fall to your upper thigh and a pair of semi-translucent leggings. When your hands go up to touch a suncatcher Hobi can tell you’re wearing shorts underneath, but the implication that you might be not is still there. There’s A little bit of flour on your front from whatever you were baking today. 

The first thing he notices is a band-aid on your finger. 

His sleazy coworker lays it on thick, leaning over your shoulder, grinning from ear to ear. You don’t seem to realize that he’s snuck up on you. Hobi watches as you flinch and step back, clutching a small pink package to your chest. Turning around quick. 

Hobi swallows back a growl. Instincts grating.

"Can I help you find anything beautiful?” he drawls, casting you a dazzling grin that Hobi's sure has gotten him many first date. 

"I was just-" Hobi drops a bouquet of roses into a nearby bucket with a loud thud. Your eyes shoot up, and Hobi sees the visceral way your shoulders relax, the way you instantly brighten.

"Hey! I got your lunch." 

Hobi's coworkers splutter. Gazes darting between you and Hobi like they can’t make sense of it. “What?!" One of them hits him on the shoulder playfully like they're friends and Hobi's jaw ticks. "Yeah, Hobi what the fuck-" 

Hobi's fingers are still on the roses as he looks at you, he doesn't tear his eyes away for a second, "She's my newest packmate," they've got a good sense to be embarrassed to try and recoup the situation.

“Oh- we didn't think Hobi could have such pretty packmates."

Oh, you don't like that one bit. 

Your switch flips, Hobi sees you make the conscious decision to turn on the part of yourself that can be very charming, that makes his alpha ask ‘how high?’ if you even think about asking him to jump. You're very good at playing this game, encouraging their instincts out in just a few words. 

You step closer looping your arm through Hobi's (He swears he won't be thinking about it later, how you push your body up against his just so, the faint warmth of your chest surrounding his upper arm, your fingers weakly tangling through his) You tilt your mating mark into the light so that they see it. tucking your hair behind your ear like you’re shy.  your sleeve falls down, leaving your scent gland open to the bear air. 

"You've obviously never met Jin then.” You pout up at him in mock distress, making it as cute as possible. “but- I would have thought he'd have told you all about me what with the car I gave him." 

Hobi doesn’t believe your sudden sniffle for a second even though his face heats. And renewed incredulity hits their faces, near devastation that their written-off coworker has a packmate like this. 

You blink back faux tears, “Did you not like it?” there is nothing cuter than a pretty pouty omega near crying because they think they've disappointed their alpha. Nothing that tugs on their instincts quite like this. 

The men blink dumbly. This creature- is surely representative of another life, one that they hadn’t imagined for their coworker. Surely when they called Hobi a sugar baby, this isn’t what they had in mind.

"He talks about it so much!"

"I swear everyone slows down when they see it which is why the boss lets him park it out front." 

"It's a really pretty car like really pretty," Felix says, eyes definitely not on your face but oh well.

Hobi grasps his little lunchbox hard, wrapped up in one of Tae's pink patterned silk scarves. Too intimidated to respond. You have them wrapped around your fingers in just a few words.

"Show me the flowers?" you offer, clearly done conversing with them, Hobi takes the easy out without a look in his coworkers’ direction.

The slick of the refrigerator doors slides close, blocking out the three of them clearly peering in. Your closeness is disguised by the condensation on the glass. Let them think something more of the way you stand close. 

The mask falls in a second and where one moment you’d looked forcefully cute, the next, you just look tired. 

"You're a menace." 

You huff, wrapping your arms around your waist. "Only when I need to be"

"You didn't have to do that." He says because he doesn't know exactly what to say. How to express that he’s thankful without making it weird. Now that you've stepped away from the others there’s something vaguely wilted about you, something still. He’s noticed the last few days, since Namjoon’s rut if he’s being honest. 

The truth is, nothing's been normal after Namjoon's rut. 

The first day after Namjoon’s rut you’d avoided each other's company like the plague, fielding Namjoon’s numerous apologies and in general clingy behavior. But after a day or two you'd reached an unspoken agreement to just forget everything that had happened just like Jimin and Tae. 

(That's a lie. Jimin and Tae have slept on opposite sides of every bed they've slept in in the last week.)

Hobi’s not sure why he thinks that there's something wrong, why he finds himself watching you and waiting. Measuring your plate at dinner for maybe the first time in weeks. Watching you when you cook, just…. keeping an eye on you in a way he might not have before. 

Is it just him, or have you seemed less interested in cuddling and nesting as usual? There's something in you that just wants to get the nest in the upstairs over and done with and back to normal. Hobi had watched while he'd helped bring the countless blankets up there, every one of your movements rehearsed and perfunctory. 

And yesterday, he’d walked into your room (your old room he should call it) And found you and Yoongi deep in conversation, sitting on the edge of your bed. And when Hobi had asked Yoongi had just said, “We’re gonna keep the nest in here for a few more days.” You'd ended up turning your bed around and tucking it into the wall by your dresser, making room for Tae's makeup desk. 

At first, He thought that maybe he’d hurt you with his leaving. That you took it as an ultimate rejection of not only your friendship but your presence in the pack. But it seems like you’re as determined as he is to keep things as they were before. To act as though your relationship is just as it was. Just this. packmates that bring each other lunch and give each other cars and definitely step closer to make Hobi's nosey coworkers a little jealous. 

Strange. All of it feels strange like deja vu. There’s a familiar stillness that he hasn’t seen in you in months really, not since late spring. Since before you started talking again only this time he's seeing the process in reverse. 

You tap the lunch box with your fingertips, a faint flush coming to your cheeks, “Yoongi made it for you, not me.” 

“Does it matter?” you flush harder, skin heating under his raised eyebrow, 

“Yes.”

Hobi thinks your hands might be shaking a little bit when you gesture to the shelves piled high with flowers and buckets. "Which ones are your favorite anyway?" you ask, classic misdirection. 

A few weeks ago Hobi had convinced his boss to order the flowers by color and not type to make arranging and picking out designs easier. Granted, Hobi is her most talented employee and the one she trusts most to handle their big-budget items like weddings and funerals so it was a relatively short argument. 

This refrigerator is a mess of cream pinks, whites, and yellows. The big dinner plate-sized sunflowers hovering around your knees, and the dusty roses at the ceiling. 

He points at the simple daisies, is it just his imagination, or do you make your giggle just a little bit louder, leaning into his arm. Hobi swears one of his coworkers is going to burst a blood vessel with how hard he's trying to contain his screech of indignation. You just grin and roll your eyes. 

“Are you trying to make my life easier or harder?” He can’t stop his smile though, no matter how much he wants to. 

“A bit of both probably.” You lean in close, the way an omega would to an alpha they were flirting with. Let them wonder what we’re saying, let them wonder what I mean by this. Your fingers dance over a nearby bucket, skimming the velvet soft blooms, “I would have pinned you for a Lily type of guy." 

Hobi fingers one of the long stems, playing with it too. "Nah, these are Jungkook’s favorite, not mine." Hobi's shy when it comes to you, but still, he musters up the courage to take a spare bloom of daisy and tuck it behind your ear.

"As a thank you, for my lunch. Jungkook shouldn’t have made you come all the way here." 

You shrug, "It’s no big deal. I- ugh- i put a few chocolates in there, the coconut ones." You might have noticed Hobi grabbing some last night, and he gravitated toward those in the big bowl of Halloween candy. Seeking out the little blue packages. 

"I like those," he says, but you already know that.

There’s a loud crash, and when you look back Hobi’s coworkers have knocked one of the dysplays over in their quest for a better vantage point. they scramble to put it back together and look busy like they weren’t watching you.

Chan gives him a thumbs up and Hobi scoffs. 

“I’m sorry for them.” He says, “They’re kind of always like this,” his jaw ticks. Some alphas have no manners. 

You shrug, “It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before. Are those the same ones that say shit about you behind your back?” 

“Yes.” 

You hesitate for a moment, standing toe to toe with him. “We should give them something else to talk about then.” Hobi’s hands are hard on the lunch box. 

You step closer. Your worn boots brushing his sneakers as you lean up on your tippy toes. The scent mark looks more intimate that it is as you lightly drag your cheek down Hobi's neck. You know how to make it look sensual. 

His caramel scent and your baked one together smell like flan or maybe something vaguely that belongs in the family of a Snickers bar, sparking hot and heady. Filling the refrigerator with it and the smell of flowers. He catches your waist, alarmed but not entirely displeased.

It has the desired effect.

Hobi sees the other alphas, the way their egos deflate. Tail tucked between their legs. Immediately looking dejected. Hobi barely has time to process your hand threading through the hair at the back of his neck, the way you sway closer before you're darting away. 

He catches you just before you pass back through the refrigerator doors (you should know better than to run from an alpha, there's hardly anything more exciting than the prospect of a chase). A real giggle fills the small space making the other 3 perk up. Hobi can’t stop himself from smiling even if he feels a little dizzy. 

He catches your hand, tugging you a little bit back. “Hang out with me? Later?”

The stillness in you eases just a little, and your smile is twice as bright as the sunflowers. “Sure.”

He lets your hand go even though he doesn't want to, even though you could eat together. He imagines it; sitting in his car, Yoongi’s parked out front, you in his passenger seat having a few of those chocolates. But you have no reason to stay and keep him company through his lunch break.’

Hobi is too shy to ask. 

Before you pass through the door you pause, looking at the suncatchers that hang by the windows again. Reaching out a finger to touch one so that rainbows swirl through the room. The sun's light misdirected to spill and swirl in a dizzying display of color. The door clangs closed with a faint jingle. 

He sets his hand over the back of his hot neck. Heart thundering, something in his instincts relaxes by having you out the door and away from his other...competitors. They instantly descend on him, badgering him with countless questions. 

“I didn’t know you could pull like that hyung," "How did you even meet?" does she have a sister?" "Does she have a favorite type of nesting supplies?” 

Hobi shoots that last one a glare. "I think she's got everything she needs in that department." he says tightly. 

He’d have thought your mating mark would be enough of a deterrent. The fact that it isn’t makes him even more annoyed if that's possible. They don’t get a single answer out of him- just the freezer door closed and locked in their faces. He sits there to eat his lunch, glaring at them through the foggy doors. 

When he opens his lunchbox, he sees that you've shoved 7 chocolates into a space that should only logically fit 5. Rows of sliced meat and a dollop of sauce over rice in the shape of a heart. A sandwich just the way he likes it, cut-up fruit too, probably a whole pint of Strawberries cut into little hearts. 

(The other alphas don't stand a chance.) 

~-~

(Tae, Some time later) 

Autumn brings with it lazy nights and the need for more blankets. You often find yourself curled up on the couch in Tae's room. Alternating between watching the autumn rain drip from the eves, going on tic-tock, napping, and watching Tae work at her desk. Sometimes on work nights, she's got her hair set into little pin curls, or a face mask on.

It's kind of silly that you can spend just hours watching her but you are that in love.

Her typing is gentle, a companion to the pitter-patter of the rain and the tv in the other room. Someone talking, someone showering, the faint thump thump thump of your heart, noodle meowing to be let in from outside, homey domestic and Awfully lonely.

It’s silly, you shouldn’t feel alone with Tae right there.

You stir sometimes, stretching your feet out and yawning. Cheek resting on the pillow.  "I can shut the light if you want" Tae says, recognizing the feeling like she's being watched. She doesn’t turn because she knows it's you.

"No, I'm not tired" but the slow rising of your chest says something different. You've let the blanket slip off of you a little bit, folding your body onto her small couch fitting just barely. She rolls herself over to you to fix it and tuck it around your feet. Then goes back to writing.

"You've been typing one thing for a long time now”

Tae hums, agreeing. Pausing for a second and going back to delete one sentence and replacing it with another before her cursor moves on stepping in time with the clack of her fingers. She's gone with a shorter manicure this time to make typing easier, smooth little almonds that flash like fish scales. Pretty and pearlescent.

“You were writing the same thing yesterday and the day before that too. Is it a story?" you ask. Tae likes how you always ask that first, is it a story or a poem, by stanza or by prose. Which part of your soul are you working on today? is it more comfort or a bit of hurt?

Her fingers hesitate, "it is." She admits. “I’ve got like, maybe 30,000 words of it written already but yeah, it’s a story.”

“You don't write stories often."

she tips her head in agreement. "What could I add to the world you know? there are so many good books out there," she sighs heavily, "But-" she trails off, eyes full of faraway faces and a love that maybe feels a little bit like yours and Hobi’s. She always was better at catharizing her emotions about their relationships by comparing them to others. Namjoon and Jin are all Claire and Jamie. Yoongi and Hobi Westley and Buttercup.

But You and Hobi are something different. Maybe she took hobi's advice and found another outlet for her feelings about you two rather than get involved. then again, the main male character is actually a lot more like jungkook sometimes when he speaks. 

Bits and pieces of Tae’s loves and muses are all over the story, but the main character? She’s all you. 

"What's different about this one?" You ask, hair spilling over your shoulders in an uninterrupted tangle that has Tae itching for a brush. You'd tried her pin curls out a few nights ago but had complained about the pinching so Tae quiets the part of herself that wants to use you as her own mini dress-up doll.

"Usually my emotions are brief, but" she presses her palm to her chest, "I have all this pain here. All of this pain and all of these thoughts and I don't think I know what to do with it besides write it down." You pull yourself up and closer to her, phone slipping out of your lap and sliding onto the carpeted floor. But Tae’s smile is already comforting even if it is a little sad.

She wheels herself over again and presses her lips to yours, your needy fingers almost instantly find her waist, the way you grab at her when you want to cuddle. Tae knows your body language so well.

"It’s not something you can make better darling," she says, and she means it, the way she looks at you means she means it. "But I think- I think giving it to other people might make it better, a little."

You lean your cheek into her palm, sleepily sighing. "What’s it about?"

Tae launches into the beginning, and the rest is history. She talks about her own story the same way that she talks about the books she reads. Fast and excited, like it's right there in front of her eyes on a movie screen.

“It starts with a library- only it’s not like a normal library. This library is kind of magic-”

~-~

(Namjoon, 7 days after rut) 

In the wake of Namjoon's rut, all of the alphas have been feeling their instincts a little more keenly; this has expressed itself in only one behavior one that you didn't think you'd see the return of after it had sort of calmed down at the beginning of your relationship. 

You don’t know how to feel about the fresh return of the courting presents. 

But with the nest upstairs, you suppose that you don't mind the veritable collection of new nesting pillows, blankets, and specially made Egyptian cotton sheets for your Alaskan king-sized mattress- courtesy of Jimin. In a variety of colors of course; black for his preference, and pink for Tae’s. 

Namjoon doesn't like being one-upped by anyone. Although his gift takes several more days to arrive and set up. (Yoongi stayed up the night before with Namjoon to help set it up because Namjoon is notoriously bad about any sort of home improvement let alone when there's an Allen wrench and six pages of instructions involved)

You giggle as Namjoon's fingers tamp over your eyes. He almost steps on the back of your heels with how close you're walking. "Here, there's a wall" You reach out and help him lead you so that the surprise isn't spoiled.  Bright shafts of light slip through his fingers. 

"Joonie-"

"Here, step down- there you go pup. Here-"

Namjoon takes his hands from your eyes and resists the urge to bounce up and down, your wide blinks, your suddenly sweet scent all of it, soothing to the cloying discomfort of instincts not expressed in his chest. Lips parted into a cute little oh. 

You're in the backroom, the last coat of paint was finished yesterday and the pack has gone to work putting it together with the new velvet green couch and many of Hobi's plants. But what you don't expect is the item just left of the door. 

The nesting couch, or more correctly nesting pod has high walls that peak at the top somewhat like an onion. The interior of it is upholstered with smooth non-irritating fabric and a thick cushion at the base and up part of the walls. a soft little bowl almost like a human-sized dog bed (a pup bed). 

A small dark soft space, perfect for nesting. With a little curtain that you can zip closed, that should enswathe you entirely in darkness. The interior of it is Piled high with a new duvet and more than a dozen new pillows (all freshly scented) like a bowl of colorful candies. Some of them are vaguely stuffed animal shaped and a few actually are stuffed animals.

You blink down at the croissant and the cake, the disembodied blueberry. 

“Jungkook might have helped me pick them out, he went a little over the top.” Namjoon rubs at the back of his neck. “It’s rut or a” he coughs, “first knotting present, I guess. As a thank you and an I’m sorry for biting you present.” Namjoon shifts back and forth, feeling vaguely nauseous but in a love-sick sort of way. “Do you like it?”

Nesting nooks are expensive gifts, this one alone must have been several thousand dollars. Although Namjoon's anxiety ticks higher as you continue to not say anything. Staring at it and blinking like you can’t believe it’s there. “I thought you could maybe, use a bit of space because of the upstairs, I know you’re used to nesting on your own.” Yoongi had told him about your need to keep your downstairs nest still set up. You know the second the sentence slips past his lips that they've talked about it, that Namjoon’s worried. 

It's nothing personal you just, you feel like you might need a little spot, like Tae does for her library room, a little spot that's just yours. A spot for you to be quiet

And Namjoon's just given you it. 

Your mouth twists and Namjoon tilts your jaw up to his so that he can duck in close and nose along your hairline. "Hey I didn't mean-" 

You take the nearest cushion and crush it to your chest, this one the shape of a graham cracker. "I love it." Your gaze darts away, heart in your throat. "Can I? Try it out?" 

Namjoon steps aside hastily, watching as you ease inside it. Pulling yourself into the dark cavern. it’s soft and comfy. protected in a way that has you instantly feeling hazy. Quiet and mostly scentless, the noises from outside Dampened, the feeling of everything butter soft beneath your fingers. 

It's so safe here. 

You start to knead a pillow, softly, the way that noodle might. Flopping over onto your side. Back against the cushion wall. Rolling a little in it. And a slow purring slowly fills the room, soft and first, and then stronger. You rub your scent across the border, making it smell like yours. 

Namjoon drops to his knees and watches you. when he sticks out his hand you nuzzle into it, cheeks pink, scent omegaspace sweet. you chirp happily and he smiles down at you. 

“There you go pup.”

~-~

(Tae, sometime at night)

(Content warning)

Namjoon isn’t the only one who's gotten you courting gifts recently. 

Tae presents yours to you with pink cheeks, the small rectangle pretty when you unwrap it, green warn fabric, and embroidery on the cover.

It’s a copy of Alice and Wonderland, delicately illustrated with watercolor splotches of characters on every other page. It smells like vanilla the way that Jimin smells like vanilla, the musk of it soft and smooth. 

The next time you get small and pupish Tae reads to you, her soft voice lulling you into a softer, smaller headspace. So fuzzy that you can’t feel your toes, mind dumbly repeating ‘mommy, mommy mommy’ with little else on your mind. 

Page after page of pictures that your wide eyes follow without so much as a word, small whines when Tae pauses to see if you’ve fallen asleep yet tell her everything she needs to know about if it had been a good decision or not. the right gift. 

Tae is the only alpha in the pack that can give you this, who can trigger omegaspace in you with as little as a raised eyebrow. 

She has a fantastic reading voice. She and makes the voices of the white rabbit and the mad hare just funny enough to have you huffing soft giggly purrs. 

It's not the last book she gets you. Far from it, over the next few weeks, you quickly fall into a routine: after dinner, she’ll find you in the nesting nook, in your room, or in the bathroom washing up. And she’ll pull you in the direction of the library room and produce another wrapped volume. Some of them illustrated and some not.

You’ll curl up together on the couch, one ear pressed to her heartbeat, another that inches to hear her words and a soft croons. Her hair tickling your forehead where it lingers, just around her shoulders. Grown out now and faster since she started to use a fancy hair serum. 

There are other, slightly more scandalous times, when you squirm at certain parts, unable to find a properly soothed position. When you turn to nuzzle into her shoulder. Nosing along her collarbones and searching for something that makes Tae’s chest tight in all the best ways. Bright eyes glassy, too shy to ask for what you wanted.

What you needed.

The first time you’d face planted into her chest into her barely there but steadily growing tits. She’d laughed, the skin there new feeling and vaguely sensitive. Little white stretch marks shine like a silver lining over the hem of her lace top. 

“You looking for something pup?” she’d teased, she wasn’t necessarily surprised after all, you hadn’t been looking at the book for a few minutes, watching her soft inhale and exhale. The faint imprint of her nipples under the shirt. 

“Can- can I” you’d stuttered, words too hard for you to string together, looking down at Tae’s chest, fingers bunching up the fabric of her dove-colored night dress.  

Being in omegaspace is easier than being totally up these days. Tae knows you need this, without saying why, something is going on in your head that seems too big for it, something that makes you listless and quiet when no one’s around. There’s a reason- there has to be. 

her hand cups your cheek and directs your gaze to her face and not her chest, and you blush, having been caught looking. “Good pups use their words, honey, even if they’re feeling small and needy.”

You struggle when you pull back, sorting through your pupils brain is a difficult task when preoccupied with Tae, mommy, want, pretty, mommy alpha smells so nice, looks so safe. 

“Can I- can I put my mouth on Mommy?” heat laces down her chest, a fire like none other that has her body growing warm everywhere you touch, the smooth line of your inner thigh pressed to hers, your stomach as you inhale to whine. You squirm away from the embarrassment of asking for something so taboo. 

Her hand grips your waist, and you know you aren’t going anywhere. 

“Take what you need pup.” 

Her spaghetti straps are down around her shoulders before you can blink, dress rucked down to her rib cage. Her chest has swelled so prettily from the hormones her nipples little puffy peaks. She’s maybe a b cup at best but your mouth waters, a whine slipping from your lips without you trying to summon it.  

Tae guides you to them with her hand threaded through the hair on the back of your head. Fingers rubbing soothingly against your scalp and oh 

With Tae so close, you can smell all of her. It’s so natural when your mouth guides into a suck, Hot and gentle where she’s sensitive. Your nose nudges against her skin taking deep lungfuls of her scent, greedy in the way that you curl around her body. Your brain is truly quiet for the first time in months. Resting your head in the crook of her elbow. 

Tae sighs and stretches out while you settle. It’s not exactly not sexual but intimate, the attention at her chest isn’t something that makes arousal stir in her stomach, not when it's like this. Sucking softly, never too hard, with the same pressure that you might mouth at a soft blackberry, lips teasing but only just teasing.

She picks back up the book and keeps reading, ignoring the way her breath hitches with every harder suck. 

There is something about tucking your face close, hands tangling in her dress, that feels like the most natural expression of your dynamic. The way she pets over your shoulders and reads to you while you set down your heavy worries. Clinging to her until your fingers go slack and your sucking slows. Lips parting to let out soft sleepy breaths across her sensitive skin and Tae knows you’ve fallen asleep. 

Tae is the only alpha who can give you this.

After the first time, all bets are off. 

Tae often finds you tugging at her top at dinner time, fingers curious and needy on her ribcage, unwilling to touch where you need to under the gaze of so many other. 

Bending under the need, the haze of omegaspace tugging at you, begging for the couch and her in the green room. It’s especially bad if she wears anything low-cut. You’re squirmy in her lap during movie nights, a little breathless any time she hugs you (she might be a little mean and tug you up so that you're face to face with the object of your desire)

You're more than a little nervous around the rest of the pack. 

But she agrees this is a secret. A habit that should be just yours. Tae never would have said there would be anything too intimate to share with them after coming out but maybe this is. 

One time and one time only does Jimin accidentally walk in on you, 

Namjoon is close behind, she isn’t sure what their reasons are. Luckily your head is blocked by a blanket and Tae only has to hiss a “get out” for them to turn tail and run. Thankfully, they hadn’t prodded that much about it later.  

It’s not always so innocent, sometimes Tae’s thigh presses up between your own guiding you into a slow grind or her fingers wander, gently parting your thighs and pressing up and under your sleep shorts. fingers curiously exoloring  between your thighs insistent to taste your pleasure in the air and hear your needy moans. 

But every time you stop sucking, she stops touching. leaves her fingers just there tugging on your clit or just around them. Caught between a rock and a hard place, as you keep going, looking up at her, hips jerking against her fingers. Your sucking near frantic as you cum and Tae's wicked smile and mean laugh above you as you gush and drip around her fingers. rubbing gently over your clit at the same rhythm which you suck.

Worse are the times that she says, “Mommy’s turn” with a smile on her face. Switching your positions entirely. Holding your wrists so that you can’t try and cover yourself as she licks and sucks with abandon. Rubbing your frustrated tears away with her thumbs as she sucks at your nipples until they’re bitten and sensitive. So sensitive that you feel them every time they rub against your shirt, constantly distracting you and reminding you of her touch. 

There is something about you needy and squirmy in omegaspace, dripping messy all over her nightdress, upset and tearful at being teased for so long that makes Tae’s alpha purr, makes her almost addicted. Those moments usually end with her cumming over your tummy and you grinding one out against her face or her thigh and once, her tits.

She’s cum on yours before, had you hold up her skirt like a good girl, standing there with your nipples wet from her mouth to let her jack off all over you. listening to you babble about how pretty her cock looks, how beautiful she is, it never takes her long.

The walk of shame to the bathroom had drawn the stares of quite a few of your packmates, Jimin had nearly walked into a wall as Tae led you upstairs for a shower. 

It's intoxicating being needed, being the bearer of your needy whines and these delicate moments. When one nipple gets too sensitive and Tae transfers you to another, cheeks pink, lips wet and kissable, tasting like Tae's skin when she leans down. fussy, unwilling to be parted from her for even a second. 

Tae looks and feels her most beautiful with her chest sucked pink,  nipples glossy from your mouth when you inevitably fall asleep like that. And Tae has to pull up her dress and call for one of the alphas to help carry you to the nest like you weren't just doing something so salacious

When you’re alone, and your fingers instantly gravitate towards the buttons on her blouse, needy whines mean only one thing as you struggle to unfasten the buttons. Fingers clumsy from your wanting.

"My sweet little pup, so cute and needy for mommy that you can't even wait for a second, what am I going to do with you?"

~-~

(Hobi, the same day as before) 

Not many people use the beach this late in the season. The businesses on the boardwalk are half-boarded up now that the tourist rush is over and half of the lights are empty and vacant of their usual neon splendor.

But maybe if Yoongi were here, he’d say that this is the way that you and Hobi flirt. With jabs back and forth like crashing waves. Jests of Are you tired yet? and not at all as you run and giggle, splashing through the dark waves. Happy and zoomy in the way that dogs get when you give them wide open spaces to run. Until the late hour drags your bones down and exhaustion makes you giggly and innocent. The way you and Hobi maybe never get to be when you’re not alone with each other.

But you can trust him, with your sensitive parts and your darkness too.

The beach is quiet at night, the hem of your pajama pants soaked 3 inches up from the cold water. Your shoes sit discarded in the sand and the cold salt air tickles your forehead and your bare toes. A pair of headphones between the two of you tangle in the sand like a string of fate. You bob your head to Hobi’s most recent favorite song and shiver.

Hobi notices and starts to shuck off his jacket, thick sweatshirt balmy underneath. You make a noise in protest but he doesn’t listen. His next words a mess in the middle of so much base, “I’ve got more meat on my bones than you do.”

You take his headphone out of your ear. “You sure?”

“Yeah,”

You ease into the warmth like it’s what you’ve been waiting for, and Hobi pulls himself closer to you to block the wind. You know you'll smell like him tomorrow morning, that the others will hover and breathe deep, appreciating your combined scents.

The moon is bright tonight, casting everything in shimmery pools of silver. You can see him in near-perfect blue-grey detail. It’s what drew you out tonight, the promise of an extra high tide and the glittering splendor of the ocean on a full moon. The drag of waves has the same tempo as Hobi’s soul, the tide higher than usual.

You fold the sleeves over your hands in the semi-darkness and it strikes him as oddly fragile, the way you curl in on yourself. One second happy and zoomy, and the next almost conservative. Like you think you won’t have enough joy for later. Your happiness reseeding like a tide.

Hobi turns his knees to the side. "You've been acting different since the rut." Was it me? Was I the one who made you look a little smaller, a little sadder than you were yesterday? You deflate at his words and Hobi struggles. “Not weird! It’s not bad I’m just-” worried- so fucking worried.

“Was it the alphas today?” he trails off, unsure of what he's asking.

You turn towards him, shoulders resting against the sand. All rocks made small, and time and energy that's made boulders movable. The sand curves to the shape of your body. Your cradle and your grave.

"No- your coworkers were fine just-" You shrivel your nose at the stars, maybe fate is taking notes. "Alphas, you know?" 

"Hey, I’m an alpha too." He pushes at your shoulder playfully, trying to make the mood lighter so that you’re more likely to tell him what's really wrong. There’s sand in your hair when you turn away hiding your small smile like the sliver of a crescent moon. He feels like he should have anticipated that and brought a blanket or at least a towel for you to lie on, if not to make you warmer than to at least make sure you didn’t get sand in your hair. 

"Yeah, but you're one of the good ones." 

He settles back against the sand, faintly warm from the sunshine still. At odds with the cold wind that whips at the two of you. “I’m okay, you don’t have to worry about me, I’m just-“ your face twists with melancholy. “Tired.”

Tired. Hobi had found you dozing in the nesting nook tonight. Why had you slept there and not upstairs? You could have waited for him in either place- so why did you choose the one that made you alone? Why deny yourself the comfort at your fingertips?

Hobi swallows, “do you want to head back?”

Your eyelashes flutter whisper soft against your cheek, your voice thick like you might be about to cry. But you can tell Hobi these things, the restless half-exhaustion of not knowing when it will get easier, the exhaustion of having to try so hard for so long and still feel like you haven't gotten anywhere.

“I don’t think it’s the kind of tired that sleep can fix Hobi.” 

Hobi blinks back the tightening in his chest like someone has stretched a rubber band around his lungs, pulling himself up so that you’ve got to look at him and see the sincerity in his face. 

"You don't have to be okay you know. You don't have to, it would be okay if you weren't. We'd make it okay." 

You swallow and it takes you a long time to answer, long enough that Hobi gets a little worried. You pick up the sand and let it fall through your hand. Dry, movable, changing. When the words come, they’re like a flood.

"It didn't fix me.”

You look like you don’t want to admit it, but the truth is so hard to contend with sometimes when expectations are proven false. 

“The rut- being with Namjoon- Proving I could handle it. It didn't fix what was broken with me. I think I wanted it to like- make me feel whole, make me feel normal. It's what an omega in my position should be doing. Helping their alpha. Being good.”

Your breath hitches, and you know that there are so many many ways to be good. Being good for Geumjae meant starving yourself and staying quiet. You thought that maybe being good for Namjoon would be easier, that taking care of yourself would become easy because he wanted that for you. 

But maybe it's not the alphas you're with that are the problem. 

You liked the rut, you would swear on your mating mark that nothing happened during it that you didn't consent to and fully anticipate. So why do you still feel so fragile? Like you should be apologetic for it, like somehow- you didn't live up to their expectations.

He rolls back onto his ass letting you sit away from him because distance feels like what you might need. 

"Good, I didn't want you to choose that." 

As much as Hobi and the others are loathed to admit it, regardless of the bite mark now yellowing against your thigh, you being there actually did help during Namjoon's rut. Usually, at least one of them is left looking gaunt and in need of a few days’ rest. Jungkook didn’t even have a seizure this time. And to everyone's surprise, the pack had gone mostly back to normal sort of instantly. 

Everyone had been able to walk just fine the following evening, they'd take it slow, but maybe they hadn't needed to. Hobi would have never called them unbalanced before but it's clear now how much their pack benefits from having a third omega.

But none of that would matter if you decided that you'd taken that step too quickly. 

Your hand tangles with his, tangles with the sand. His fingers are strong and birdlike in yours, warm and rough.

He waits for a few long breaths "Was it bad that I said that?" Double checking, because you're both allowed to double-check when you need to. Both you and Hobi struggle to trust your internal narrative because you know how easy it is to twist it. 

You take turns like this often, being vulnerable, being the one to break apart. Your laugh is something jagged, tearing up bits of yourself that you don’t want to keep, don’t want to hold onto, you swear. 

How is it so easy to be hurt and yet so difficult to let the things that hurt you go? 

"Yes," your laugh is sadder than he likes, you tuck your face back into the crook of his shoulder. “No. It’s fair. I think I’m just overwhelmed a little, I just wish I knew how to hope like you do. Every time I’m sad it feels like it’s like it’s the saddest I’ve ever been. Like there’s no coming back from it. It's exhausting always trying to be hopeful. How do you do it?" 

Hobi likes thinking about it like that; hoping as a learned skill and not as an affliction. He gets cynical every time he gets sad and You know this best. He wonders when exactly you became the person he goes to with all of his contradictions. He doesn't know when he became this person for you either but he likes it.

He likes it. 

He pulls himself a little bit closer to you. Nudging your shoulder with his and leaning. Rubbing quick up and down your calves to warm you up. The flannel of your pajama bottoms are rough against his fingers, he thinks they might be Yoongi's. 

"I don't know, guess just I have to hope the healing adds up one day. When I'm not sad I don't know what else to do but hope." 

You sit like that in silence for a good long while, the headphones buzzing on the sand between the two of you, quietly watching the ocean.  

“I think you might be my best friend.” You admit quietly. Hobi’s smile makes the moon shine just a little brighter. 

“I think you might be my best friend too.” 

You sit like that, your body pressed up against his for a long time watching the ocean. Long enough that Hobi thinks you both might turn into statues, turned to marble pearly ness underneath the moons light, like it's trying to keep you here in this moment for as long as possible. 

Hobi thinks you might have fallen asleep but then You stiffen and freeze. It's not him you're looking at when he turns. Your eyes have lost their glassiness, squinting into the ocean at something in the distance. Bobbing too close to be a buoy and too hard-shaped to be a patch of seaweed. 

"Hobi, I think there's something out there in the water."

~-~

Please Like, Comment, and Reblog <3 every word helps motivate me to write the next chapter!

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Come tell me what you liked about this chapter!

 ~-~

Extra’s: Tae’s angel halloween dress + the nesting nook

[parad-ice-lostandfound]

Prompt: "Stop trying to get me to walk under the mistletoe.” “You break the tradition and you end up being cursed for life. Is that what you want?” “…Are you blackmailing me right now?”

Pairing: Floyd Leech x GN!Reader

Genre: Fluff

TW: Reader is not Yuu, Reader is implied to be human and an Octavinelle student, Jade is a menace who let's his brother get away with everything.

AN: Day 3 and it's Floyd! His was the first fic that I completed so I have a special spot for this in my heart. I love how this turned out honestly. Also this prompt was the one that gave me the idea to do this event in the first place lol. I tried my best to keep Floyd in character as much as I could, but if he feels ooc I'm sorry hehe. Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

You could feel Floyd staring holes into your head as you served the customers in the Mostro Lounge.

The Lounge was busier than usual. With the steady arrival of the holidays, even the gruelling exams the staff had set for the student body couldn't dampen their spirits, which meant celebrating in advance at the Lounge with friends. And with business booming your house warden was in even higher spirits. Of course, the growing rush of patrons for the Lounge meant that nearly all of Octavinelle was roped in to help out, serving dishes and working in the kitchen.

A little extra pocket money never hurt anyone, plus Azul had assured that everyone who would work a certain amount of hours at the lounge would be getting a considerable bonus, so you didn't mind having to work long hours scrubbing dishes or smiling at customers as you helped them pick out what to eat and drink. It was a welcome distraction from poring over your books till your brain turned to mush and driving yourself up the wall overthinking about the results of your exams (that you knew you did well at; it's just irrational fears doing what they do best).

What you did mind, however, was the fact that somehow, you had managed to catch the attention of one of the most unpredictable students at Night Raven College, Floyd Leech.

No, scratch that. Catching his attention was... fine, but holding it for more than two days?

That was terrifying.

You mentally cursed out the idiot who had attached sprigs of mistletoe to all the doorways in the Octavinelle dorm. While it had led to many funny and embarrassing moments for others in the dorm, it had quickly become tiresome to monitor yourself while entering or exiting a room. Especially when the mistletoe couldn't be removed with normal and magical means, much like a heterochromatic eel merman who just wouldn't let you be ever since you explained the silly tradition behind them to him.

"Heeyy flying fishie~"

The familiar drawl of his voice made you freeze momentarily. You held the empty server tray close to your chest as if the round piece of metal could somehow protect you from the tall eel who had taken an interest in you. "Yes, Floyd?"

Floyd gave you a lazy smirk, swinging an arm around your neck and leaning against you. You struggled a bit to hold yourself up with his added weight. You watched your vice-house warden and the twin brother of this menace turn a blind eye to your predicament, and resisted the urge to throw the tray at Jade's head as you caught a glimpse of a smirk on his lips.

"Say, why'd you run away from me yesterday, hm? Did ya wanna get squeezed that badly?" Floyd giggled, and you couldn't figure out whether your heart was cartwheeling inside your chest out of fear or because of how unbelievably adorable that sound was.

"I just- I needed to study."

"Ehhh? Study?" Floyd narrowed his eyes at you, and you prayed you had not flipped the switch on his mood from happy to angry.

"Studying's boooring. I wanna play with flying fishie~" Floyd hummed, a mysterious glint in his eyes as he pulled you towards the kitchen. One that went unnoticed as your eyes caught sight of the one plant you had started dreading seeing.

"Why is there mistletoe on the door to the kitchen?" You asked, but your question came too late. Floyd had already opened the door and pulled you in. Another sprig of mistletoe was stuck on the inside, the white berries looking down on the two of you through flecks of green. It felt like the tiny parasitic plant was mocking you for finally falling into its trap.

"Ohh, we're under mistletoe~ Just like a few days ago, isn't that right flying fishie~" he smirked, crowding you till you had your back against the door.

You looked past him to see.... no one?

Where did everyone go? Service wasn't over yet, so why was the kitchen empty?

"Flying fishie~ Where's my kiss~" he hummed, eyes carefully assessing you as his fingers pinched your cheek. You tried to act stern, but your words came out in a tired tone.

"Floyd, stop trying to get me to walk under the mistletoe with you."

“You break the tradition and you end up being cursed for life. That's what you told me. Is that what you want?” he said, his face turning sombre, as if he hadn't been smiling at you all this while.

"Are- Are you seriously blackmailing me right now?!” you sputtered, your heart beating fast as you looked at him. Floyd leaned forward, smiling innocently.

"Maybe~"

You weighed your options, eyes carefully watching the other, much to his amusement. You were well and truly trapped between the door and this absolute wall of an eel with no way out. Atleast, none that didn't involve you giving in to the tradition some way.

Huffing, you finally decided on a course of action. You held his smug face and turned it to the side, quickly planting a kiss on his cheek. The shock and surprise of this unexpected kiss loosened his hold on you, and you quickly slipped out the door.

Speed-walking past a chuckling Jade and a confused Azul, you tried to control the heat you could feel in your cheeks and at the back of your neck by sheer force of will. A quick glance at the clock showed that your shift for the day was over.

You had never left the Lounge quicker.

Jade entered the kitchen, a smile on his face as he saw Floyd leaning against the wall with a surprised look.

"Flying fishie kissed me," he mumbled, and Jade had to force back the amused laugh that threatened to break free. "I suppose the mistletoe worked its magic. Humans sure do have funny rituals."

Jade's words seemed to bring back the spark in Floyd, who gave his twin a blinding smile. "I'm gonna go ask them for more!" he said as he rushed past him, and Jade shook his head in amusement as he called out to his twin.

"Remember to confess this time, Floyd."

Back to Masterlist...

[blakeswritingimagines]

Yandere Aemond Who's Obsessed With The Lady-In-Waiting

This kind of obsessive and controlling behavior would likely lead to a descent into madness, and he would likely start to make decisions that are not only unhealthy but also dangerous. He would not be able to think clearly, and he would likely become violent and irrational. He would not stop at anything to keep you with him, even if it meant hurting himself or others.

He would likely develop an unhealthy attachment to you and would become obsessively possessive, not wanting you to be with anyone else. He would become paranoid, fearing you would fall in love with someone else. He would likely become physically violent towards anyone who got too close to you and would try to isolate you from your friends to keep you all to himself. He would be driven to insanity by his obsession, and would likely go to any length to keep you, regardless of the consequences. This kind of behavior would likely end in tragedy and would result in pain and misery for all involved.

He would likely also start to try and control every aspect of your life and would seek to control every aspect of your existence. He would try and monitor all of your behaviors and interactions and would try to control who you speak to, what you eat, what clothes you wear, how you do your hair, and every other aspect of your existence. He would try and take control of your life, and would not let you make any decisions for yourself. He would become a controlling and dominating force in your life and would try and remove all your personal agency.

When his betrothed comes to realize how obsessed he is over her lady-in-waiting, she would likely be shocked, and appalled by his jealous and obsessive behavior. She would likely be disgusted by his possessiveness over you, and would probably try to stop him from his actions, fearing for the safety and well-being of her lady-in-waiting. She would likely find his obsessive and delusional behavior to be unhinged and would try to get him to see reason and make him realize the error of his ways.

He would likely resort to violence if anyone were to try and take you from him. He would protect you from anyone he saw as a threat, and would not stop short of killing anyone if they were to take you away. He would become obsessed and violent, even if he did not want to. His obsession would make him do whatever he could to keep you with him. He would not care about consequences or morality, he would only care about keeping his fiancée and her lady-in-waiting together.

He would probably go to extremes and even criminal lengths to ensure your devotion and loyalty to him. He would likely do whatever it took to keep you with him, and he would stop at nothing to keep you as his. This could mean threatening your family and your friends and even holding you against your will. He would likely do any and all of this, even if it would harm you or make you unhappy. He would likely become a psychotic and dangerously jealous person and would become obsessed with having you all to himself.

Such an extreme level of devotion and obsession is likely to be met with great concern, if not outright horror, from his family. They would likely be concerned about his mental health and would want him to seek help for his issues. They would also likely be concerned about the safety of his fiancée and you her lady-in-waiting. They would likely encourage him to seek help or to get away from the situation. They would not want him to harm anyone or do anything terrible because of his extreme devotion to someone.

He would spend all his waking moments staring at you, watching you, admiring you. He would learn every single detail about you. He would become obsessed with you the more he learned about you. His life would revolve around you and you alone. If necessary, he would even kill to make sure you were only his. He would make you the only thing he cared about and the only thing he loved.

He would do everything in his power to ensure your safety and happiness. He would make you feel special and loved. He would make it so that you were always with him, always by his side. He would make you feel like the most important person in the world even though you are not the one he's meant to marry. You would know that you were the only one he would ever need. You would become his entire world, and he would do whatever it took to protect you and keep you safe. He would never let you go.

He would show you the strength of his devotion to you in all manner of ways. He would protect you, he would worship you, he would do anything you asked. He would become a slave to you, and he would do anything to make you happy. He would go to any lengths for you. He would make your life his sole purpose in life.

He would become increasingly paranoid and suspicious. He would start to see hidden meanings in anything you do or say, looking for confirmation that you feel the same way about him. He would start monitoring your every move and trying to keep you all to himself. But if you showed even the slightest bit of interest in someone else, he would become enraged and jealous and would try to isolate you and forbid you from seeing or speaking to that person. He would become unhinged and unpredictable, unable to control his emotions or behavior. And he would do anything for his love.

He would use manipulation tactics to try to turn you against your own mistress or whoever would try to pull you away from him. He would do everything in his power to get you to spend more time with him. He would not stop until he is assured of your love and devotion. He would become a dangerous man, blinded by his obsessive rage. But in the end, he would do anything to see your smile. Even at the expense of others.

He would do anything to be with you. Anything. He would take any risk. He would make any sacrifice. He would give up everything he has to be with you and to win your love. He would become entirely obsessed with you, and nothing else would matter. You would become his reason for breathing, and he would give up everything for you. He would sacrifice himself for you if it meant keeping you safe and happy. He would kill for you, without batting an eyelid. He would let you walk all over him and he will do anything to please you. Anything. He would be lost without you.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Monopolizing turds

Update 31 May 2023: an earlier edition of this article identified the price of Rebyota as $20,000; this was the rumored price prior to Rebyota’s release in December  2022, when Stephen Skolnick wrote the article I referenced. When Rebyota was actually released in 2023, the average wholesale price (AWP) was $10,800. Thanks to Benjamin Jolley for catching this error, and to Stephen Skolnick for getting to the bottom of it.

It’s been ten years — to the day! — since I first started writing about the bizarre, amazing world of turd transplants, in which a sick person receives a microbiotic infusion in the form of some processed poop from a healthy person:

https://web.archive.org/web/20130608030455/http://blogs.plos.org/publichealth/2013/05/29/why-diy-fecal-transplants-are-a-thing-and-the-fda-is-only-part-of-the-reason/

Gut biomes are one of those understudied, poorly understood medical areas that are both very promising and also full of sketchy medical claims from “supplement” companies, influencers, quacks and grifters. But in the decade since I first started tracking turd transplants (formally called “Fecal Microbiota Transplants” or FMTs), a growing body of sound science has emerged on the subject.

One thing that’s increasingly undeniable is that the composition of your microbial nation is related in significant ways to both your physical and mental health. What’s more, as antibiotic resistant “super bugs” proliferate, FMTs are becoming increasingly central to treating dangerous gut infections that otherwise stand a high chance of killing you.

“Eat Shit and Prosper” is Stephen Skolnick’s delightfully named newsletter about poop and health science. Skolnick is a physicist by training, but has a long history of collaboration with Openbiome, a nonprofit that coordinates between doctors, patients and donors to provide safe FMTs:

https://stephenskolnick.substack.com/

In an edition of Eat Shit from last December, Skolnick recounts the amazing history and dismaying future of FMTs. In 2013, the FDA announced it would regulate FMTs as “Investigational New Drugs,” which could only be administered as part of a registered clinical trial:

https://stephenskolnick.substack.com/p/a-monopoly-on-poop

At that point, FMTs were already in widespread use by docs to treat otherwise untreatable cases of Clostridioides difficile (C. diff), an antibiotic resistant bacterial infection that literally makes you shit yourself to death. These doctors were in no position to run registered clinical trials, which meant that they would have to stop using the most effective therapy they had for a potentially lethal infection.

Doctors and patients kicked up a fuss, and the FDA walked back its guidance, announcing that it would exercise “discretion” in enforcing its Investigational New Drug rule, giving a pass to docs who were treating C. diff with FMTs:

https://www.federalregister.gov/documents/2013/07/18/2013-17223/guidance-for-industry-enforcement-policy-regarding-investigational-new-drug-requirements-for-use-of

That’s where things have stood for the past decade or so. The “discretion” rule means that patients could still get FMTs, but their insurance wouldn’t cover it. But even if you had cash to pay for an FMT, your doc probably wouldn’t administer it for anything except a C. diff infection, despite the promising signs that FMT can help treat other conditions, and despite the generally safe nature of FMTs.

If your doc did give you an FMT, chances are good that they sourced their poop from Openbiome. Openbiome recruits very healthy people, gets them to poop in a bag, then processes the poop — removing nonbacterial solids, testing it for pathogens, freezing it, portioning it, and sending it to docs. All this is done at cost, and it’s not cheap: $1–2k/treatment, mostly due to cold-chain logistics (the poop is shipped at -80C).

Despite the cost, and despite the limitations on treatment, the Openbiome method has proved very reliable. Indeed, FMTs as a whole are pretty darned safe, with the most common side-effects being transient gas and bloating. In the past decade, there’ve been a total of six “adverse effects” associated with Openbiome’s 5,000+ procedures, all in severely immunocompromised people, and none conclusively linked to the treatment:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0016508522003511/pdf

A decade into this system, the FDA has taken the next step forward — only it’s actually a step backwards.

During this intervening decade, a pharma company called Ferring has conducted clinical trials on FMTs and received approval for an FMT product called Rebyota. The process for making Rebyota is effectively identical to the process used by Openbiome: collect poop, remove solids, test for pathogens, add glycerol, freeze and ship.

The main difference between Rebyota and Openbiome’s poop is price. While Openbiome charges $1–2k per treatment, Rebyota charges $10,800

That’s some expensive shit!

Fine. Getting Rebyota through clinical trials means that insurers might start covering it, and perhaps some patients will prefer brand-name poop to open-source poop. But as part of the FDA’s approval of Rebyota, the agency also rescinded its “discretionary enforcement” guidance, making it illegal for docs to source their poop from Openbiome:

https://www.fda.gov/regulatory-information/search-fda-guidance-documents/enforcement-policy-regarding-investigational-new-drug-requirements-use-fecal-microbiota

For Ferring, this is a monopoly on shit, one that lets them charge patients $10.8k for poop that costs $1–2k to process. The FDA does not claim that this is being done in the name of safety. Instead, an FDA official told Skonick that the goal was to “incentivize innovation without creating an access crisis.”

That is, the FDA changed its guidance and put nonprofit stool banks out of business because it wants to incentivize pharma companies to perform expensive clinical trials, and it believes that these companies won’t pay for trials if they have to compete with the likes of Openbiome, which would make it impossible to charge 900% markups on poop.

Trials are important! Evidence-based medicine is important! But Ferring’s clinical trials didn’t tell us anything we didn’t already know. FMTs were already the best therapy we had for C. diff. Testing Rebyota against a placebo didn’t tell us anything new — unlike testing Rebyota against the existing therapies, e.g. product from open stool banks.

Such a trial might have given rise to a very different regulatory outcome, because the cure rate reported by Rebyota is much lower than the cure rate from Openbiome’s own interventions:

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s40265-022-01797-x

That is, using the $1k poop from Openbiome seems to be much more effective than using the $10.8k poop from Ferring. But Openbiome, a nonprofit, hasn’t been able to perform the kind of rigorous — and expensive — clinical trial that Ferring funded.

This points to a significant problem with the FDA’s model. The agency wants good clinical data for the medicines it regulates, as it should, It presumes that the only way to get that data is through granting commercial exclusivity to a for-profit, which ends up costing patients vast sums, and locking many patients out altogether.

This creates all kinds of new dangers. 150,000 people/year in the US contract Recurrent Clostridium difficile Infection (RCdI). FMT increases the cure rate by 20% relative to antibiotics alone. That means that if everyone with RCdI gets a poop transplant, 30,000 extra people will get better. That’s a big number!

For well insured people, Rebyota probably represents a cash-savings — if your insurance covers the $10,800 procedure, you might pay $500 out of pocket, which is far less than the $1–2K you’d pay to get an Openbiome poop transplant. But if you’re uninsured or underinsured, the FDA’s new enforcement rules mean that you’re now on the hook for $10,800.

The FDA did carve out a loophole: if your doc or their hospital are willing to prepare the poop transplant themselves, they can administer that. On the one hand, preparing a poop transplant isn’t that hard — some people do them at home, on their own:

https://web.archive.org/web/20211015060558/https://thepowerofpoop.com/epatients/fecal-transplant-instructions/

But on the other hand, there’s been exactly one death conclusively linked to FMT, and it was from one of these hospital-prepared transplants (the patient had just had a marrow transplant for cancer that wiped out their immune system, and the donor had a novel pathogen that the hospital failed to test for).

So the FDA has created a situation where, if you can’t afford a $10,800 proprietary formulation, your only option is to convince your doc or hospital to prepare their own poop transplant, which will cost less than the $10.8k for Rebyota, but more than the $1–2k from Openbiome, which has all kinds of economies of scale. And if you do manage it, you’ll be getting a procedure that has a much worse safety track-record than the Openbiome process that the FDA just killed.

The FDA has an important role to play here, but as with so many policy questions, how the FDA plays that role depends on things that are far upstream from the agency and its decisions. The choice to fund medical trials through the promise of exclusivity — and with it, extremely high margins — puts the FDA in the position of choosing winners in the marketplace: Ferring wins, Openbiome loses.

Ironically, this is the thing that exclusivity is supposed to prevent. By using profit to incentivize medical research, the FDA is supposed to be recruiting the Invisible Hand as its partner in regulation. But exclusivity is incompatible with the idea of medicine as a public good. The tens (hundreds) of millions that Americans will pay for $10.8k poop transplants from Ferring will add up to far more than it would cost to underwrite clinical trials for an open process like Openbiome’s.

The result: both Americans’ wallets and Americans’ guts suffer.

Catch me on tour with Red Team Blues in Hay-on-Wye, Oxford, Manchester, Nottingham, London, and Berlin!

If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/29/oh-shit/#rebyota

[Image ID: A poop emoji wearing a top hat and a monocle, posed against a backdrop of e coli bacteria seen through a high-resolution microscope.]

[anti-romantico]

[too complicated] stray kids bangchan

warnings: unprotected sex (tomatoes tomatoes tomatoes), kitchen sex, oral (f recieving), cum swallowing, teasing, tension, let me know if i missed something

words: 1464

A/N: I've been trying to write for bangchan for a while now, not likig anything, but my friend recommended me this scenario and i love it! so i hope you guys also like it <3

You two were tipsy, not drunk. You knew what was happening, so did he. But god, his tongue fighting against yours, his hands not being able to control themselves. But both mentally thanked Jisung when he called you because no one in the party seemed to know where you were. He didn’t see anything, though, and at least you wished he did, because you needed someone to talk to. A best friend? Well, that was the funny part, Chris was your best friend, and he has been avoiding you since the kiss. And the best (worst) part was that you lived together, so it was really hard for you to forget what happened when the whole place smelled like him.

9 in the morning and you were done with your breakfast. It was Saturday so none of you needed to be anywhere, but you still looked at his door, ready to scold him for being late. And maybe you stared too hard because his door opened, showing a very tired Chris. He froze when he found you already looking, but he didn’t say anything, not even a good morning. He just walked around you to the kitchen counter and grabbed a bowl and his box of cereal.

— Are you seriously going to ignore me? Not even pretend? — You asked annoyed, turning your body to look at him. Or his back at least.

— Don’t know what you’re talking about. — He caressly said, walking to the fridge to grab the milk.

— Oh, suddenly you’re 15 again? — And Chris tried his best to now turn around, he just shrugged his shoulders. — You know what, fine. Enjoy your cereal.

He let you throw everything back to their place and slam your door. It was when he finally turned around and looked at your, now empty, seat. He didn’t know what to do.

You both successfully avoided each other for the rest of the day, literally waiting for the other’s door to get closed to go out and eat. It wasn’t until the next morning you met again, this time he was the one having his breakfast when you got out of your room.

You debeated yourself if you should be as childish as him and ignore him, but you were better than that. — Good morning. — You said in a robotic voice. He didn’t answer. You rolled your eyes and, shamelessly, imitated what he did yesterday. —  Did you sleep well? — You said, making your coffee. 

Chris was confused, and he even turned around, only to find your back facing him. — Uh… Kind of. — He answered, knowing what you were doing.

— Why? Hard night? — You poured the hot water on your cup and grabbed the granulated coffee.

— You can say that… Listen, I’m sorry for yesterday, I…

— What happened yesterday? I don’t remember. — He bit his tongue, hating that you interrupted him. You knew that.

— I was an asshole. — And contrary to what anyone could think, he knew when he was wrong and wasn’t scared to admit it.

— Really? Why? — You turned around and found him already standing up and walking to you.

— Please don’t do this… I know I did it, but that doesn’t mean you have to. — He kept his distance, still having flashbacks of that night.

— Don’t know what you’re talking about. — He had enough. Chris took another two steps and removed the cup from your hands, putting it away.

— I don’t know what you want me to say. “I didn’t mean to”? I did. I kissed you and I don’t regret it.

— Then why did you ignore me AND avoided me for almost a week? 

— Because I’m a coward.

— Yeah, no shit, Christopher.

You two stayed silent for a couple of minutes, the coffee and soggy cereal long forgotten. 

— Now what? — You asked, crossing your arms over your chest.

— I wish I knew… — He looked away.

— Why did you have to ignore me like that, then? You’re acting as if we fucked. — And you said those words. And you hated that you knew what his silence meant. — If you’re not going to answer, I'll walk to my room and pack my things. I don’t want this to be more complicated. 

— No! — He grabbed your arms to stop you, even though you didn’t even move. He slowly let you go, afraid you would leave. — Let’s… forget it, please. 

— It’s easy for you. — You answered, disappointed.

— It’s not, but I prefer that over losing my best friend.

— It’s easier than admitting there was something there? Maybe more? — You only use that tone of voice with the guys you flirted with, and Chris knew that.

— Please don’t do this to me. — His hands weren’t obeying his thought, caressing your hair.

— Don’t know what… — You repeated, but his finger around your neck stopped you.

— Stop saying that. — His voice turned deep, making you smirk.

— Or what?

— You know I’m holding back from fucking you over this counter, don’t push your luck. 

— It’s not like Jisung is going to interrupt us again, Chris. We’re alone.

Something in Chris’ head snapped, tightening the fingers around your neck to pull you and kiss you hard, making both of you moan. It felt like a big relief to finally kiss after ignoring each other for a week.

You were sucking on his tongue when you hand traveled down and got inside his pajama pants, immediately getting contact with his cock. He slept naked, the pajamas were only to not walk naked around you.

He hissed over your mouth. — Just like that, baby. Tighten a little. — The deep voice was gone, he was at your mercy, enjoying your skillful hand. — Use your other hand, please, grab my balls. Yes, like that, stroke me faster. — His hands pulled down his pants to give you more access and just let you stroke him. His moans were loud. You were so wet by his sounds. The feeling of his wet cock from his precum making everything a mess wasn’t helping either.

He didn’t last long, cumming on your hands and spilling a little on your pajama shirt. You licked his cum from your hands while staring at his eye, sending him to his knees. He pulled down your shorts and underwear, throwing them behind him. You spread your legs a little and let him lick the life out of you. 

Not only he was tongue fucking you, his finger were teasing your butthole just to add a little more of pleasure without making you uncomfortable. But he didn’t let you cum. You whined and pulled his hair, hearing him laugh.

He stood up and kissed you, making you taste yourself. His hands carried you from your butt, sitting you on the counter. And you were about to protest that you made food on it, when he thrusted in you with just one move. The feeling was different, the whole act felt different. Wet sounds filled the whole apartment, you two were too immerse in the fucking to even moan.

He was going slow, not wanting this to finish. Your eyes were on him until you couldn’t keep them open anymore. You threw your head back when the tip of his cock touched too deep. And the moan you let out was like an invitation for Chris to move faster.

The cereal boxes were digging into your back, but you didn’t want to switch positions, the angle was sending you into oblivion. He grabbed your neck again to kiss you. You weren’t complaining, it felt so good. He finally took off your shirt and attacked your nipples without stopping his hips.

You know your landlord was going to hear about this, but you would worry about that later. You felt like you ran out of hair, pulling Chris’ hair to let him know you were cumming. And this time, he helped you, massaging your clit with his middle finger until you finally cummed. 

He pulled out and started to stroke his cock fast. You pushed him back, got on your knees and replaced his hand with your mouth. It didn’t take him too long, the warm feeling of your mouth sending him to paradise and back. You swallowed him and got up to kiss him, this time making him taste himself. 

You kissed for a while until you felt his cock twitch against your stomach. You giggled.

— Does this mean you forgive me? — Chris innocently asked. 

— How can you act so cute after I just swallowed you cum?

— Don’t talk like that. — He kissed you again. — So?

— Maybe you need to apologize again. — You joked, brushing his hair back with your fingers.

He kissed you one more time and grabbed your legs, making you round his waist and carry you. — We have plenty of surfaces to fuck on, baby.

[inkblot22]

Play Hard Games, Win Soft Prizes

Gonna be absolutely so real with you, I have no idea what that title means. Maybe it'll make sense to someone. This is a request from @whenwewhereyounger. If you'd like me to remove that tag, I can do so, just let me know. Like I do for Leona fics where Farena and his canonically unnamed wife show up, I made up a name for Ruggie's grammy, just like her appearance.

Shoutout to my girlfriend for helping me with a concept that I was struggling with in this fic! Woohoo! I did so much freaking research for this one, scarred myself for life tbh, but hey, I found out a lot. So much. Also: does Ruggie's UM focused on physical or mental control, and, depending on which one, does it matter if the subject(s) are alive? Dividers by @/cafekitsune

This fic is for: Anyone who can handle it! The reader does have hair, but the length is never specified. Reader is Yuu/MC, like usual in my fics, but it is mostly implied more than anything else.

TW for: DEAD DOVE, DO NOT EAT, straight up murder and stalking in this one, everyone. Non-sexual nudity, blood and explicit gore, questionable usage of magic. Also so many words. There are 8763 words in this fic.

Ruggie is a mite conniving. You’d be lying if you said that most of Savanaclaw wasn’t, but Ruggie specifically is a calculating little bastard.

That’s rude. You know that’s rude. Ruggie does what he needs to do in order to survive. It’s something that has been drilled into him from the moment he saw the world, but you just wish he wouldn’t have invited you out here since he knows this area isn’t the safest.

Grim decided to hang out with the Octavinelle guys and you went with Ruggie for spring break. It was kind of nice, the trip there. The Afterglow is beautiful. You enjoyed yourself, it was fun and Ruggie has a wonderful sense of humor, or perhaps his laughter is just contagious. That and the sun on your skin as you traveled made for a wonderful time, actually.

No, your problems started when you got to his hometown. About as soon as you entered, something already felt off, like there were a hundred eyes watching you, waiting for something. Perhaps it was the odd shadow that seemed to be laying over the entire place, or maybe it was the occasional snicker or whisper that you thought you could hear in the eerie breeze. Whatever it was, you kind of felt like an asshole for judging his hometown so swiftly. He was sharing something deeply personal with you by even bringing you here. Ruggie is very emotionally intelligent, though, despite him being a piece of shit, so when he noticed your trepidation, he reached out and squeezed your hand.

“Are you nervous? Shyeheeheehee, don’t worry. I’m right here.” And he smiled, and you felt sort of relaxed. His smile always made you feel relaxed.

Nothing could be as relaxing when he showed you to his little home. It was nice, the walls made of dirt and a few very beautiful rugs on the inside, from what you could see. The roof was thatched, but beyond the light being streamed in by the afternoon sun, you couldn’t see very well inside the place after Ruggie opened the door. He poked his head in and pressed a hand against your belly, a silent “back up.”

You took a step back and sharply turned your head to the sound of a twig snapping. There wasn’t anything there, but you also couldn’t see the twig. For a place called the Afterglow, this area was honestly kind of shadowy. It was pretty unsettling, like a blanket that had a spider hidden in it somewhere, but you didn’t know where. You stared out into the dim distance and a gentle touch on your arm scared you out of your skin.

Ruggie’s hand retracted as he looked at you as though you'd lost it, “What’s wrong?”

“I- Sorry, I thought I heard something.”

“You did? I didn’t hear anything.”

You gave him a wide-eyed stare and he gave you one of those big grins that makes you feel like everything is going to be okay. His hand rested on your arm and he gave your bicep a gentle squeeze.

“Relax, okay? I’m right here.” With that, he led you inside and snapped his fingers, a few lights flickering on, “Grammy doesn’t seem to be home, which means you get to help me with dinner.”

“H-huh?”

“You can cook, I’ve tasted your food before, shyeheehee. C’mon.” He looped his fingers through yours again, leading you deeper into the house. As you walked, the lights behind you turned off so the ones in front of you could turn on. You belatedly realized that the electricity is reacting to Ruggie.

“No, I just- I don’t know what I would make. I mean, what does your grandmother even like?”

Ruggie gave you a sort of odd look and showed you to a kitchen, a basket with some fresh vegetables sitting on the counter. Ruggie opened the fridge and you stiffly approached the veggies.

“Hmmm, oh… Looks like we’re making pasta today. That sound good?” He asked you.

You nodded, still feeling a bit out of your element. Ruggie pointed to the veggies and smiled kindly.

“Do me a favor and start washing those? I can do most of the rest until Grammy shows up.”

You calmly looked around the kitchen for a large bowl and some baking soda, glancing back at Ruggie as he retrieved a pan and a few seasonings, clearly planning to brown the… honestly somewhat suspicious-looking slab of meat on the counter. He carefully cut the striped fur and underlying skin off of the steak and rubbed some seasonings into the meat itself, his ear twitching as he glanced back at you.

You fill your bowl with cool water, salt, and baking soda, then start washing the vegetables, “So… where is your grandmother?”

Ruggie snickers under his breath, “I’m not all-knowing.”

“Well… yeah, but I just figured she would have told you?”

“Nah. She’ll probably be back soon. Make sure you wash that celery twice, okay?”

You nod obediently and diligently tackle your task, only pausing as Ruggie plops the meat into a pan and leans back on his heels, whistling as his arms rest behind his head. He looks way more casual than usual, which is especially funny to you since his uniform is usually in some form of disarray because he moves around so much. You smile to yourself and re-wash the celery, then rinse all of the vegetables.

Ruggie’s whistling cuts off abruptly and his head jerks towards the direction of the entrance. You turn off the water, your blood chilling as you hear soft footsteps headed towards the kitchen. In other words, there was someone walking towards you. Ruggie went back to his lazy grin as he watched the meat, flipping it over a bit as a large, sinewy woman steps into view. 

She looks incredibly serious, and there’s a scar lining her face, from her jaw, straight across her nose and splitting the start of her left eyebrow. She has a pair of fuzzy, round ears, similarly to Ruggie, and freckles along her forearms. In her hair, there’s streaks of gray, but other than that, her hair is a soft, mousy brown. Just like Ruggie, she has those pretty crystal gray eyes, like the sky just after a nice rain. 

She curled her lip in a grin and pinched Ruggie’s side. He yelped, even though it didn’t look that harsh, but it must have surprised him.

Her voice is brusque, like she might smoke or she’s a lot older than she looks, “You didn’t tell me you were bringing your cute buddy along, whelp!” If you didn’t know any better, you’d say you saw Ruggie’s tail wiggle. From what you’ve understood, that tends to be a sign that he wants to remove himself from a situation. The lady, who is very obviously Ruggie’s grandmother, approached you and jerked out a very firm looking hand as Ruggie awkwardly turned back to his cooking meat.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Vittoria Bucchi, though most folks around here call me Vita or Grammy. And you are?”

You stuttered out your name, tentatively grasping Vita’s hand in a handshake. She’s kind of a mountain of a woman. She’s a good handful of inches taller than Ruggie, and if she’s taller than Ruggie, she’s definitely taller than you. She’s got to at least be 6 feet tall.

Vita’s grin grew wider and she turned back to her grandson, scooping him up in what appeared to be a bone-crushing hug and kissing him on the cheek before she placed a small paper sack on the counter and took a step back. Her eyes narrowed as she took in the sight of the two of you, and then she let out a sigh and put her hands on her hips.

“Well done, you two, but you both stink. Ruggie, darling, why don’t you take your little friend out to the showers? Grammy can take over from here.”

Ruggie seemed grateful for the out. If you didn’t know any better, you’d say he was blushing. He grabbed your hand and gave you a very unconvincing grin. Of course you followed him.

As soon as you’re in what you assume is the bedroom (there only seems to be one of those) he let out a little sigh and chuckled, “Uh… heh, sorry. I forgot to warn you that Grammy is kinda…”

“Energetic?” You offered, then shook your head as you watched Ruggie pick out some clothing, “I don’t mind. She seems really sweet. I was pretty scared when she just walked in and stared at me for a moment, but she’s very cool…”

There’s a moment as Ruggie doesn’t say anything. You felt the horrible need to fill the silence, so you continued speaking.

“Uh, I can… I can see where you get it from.” Your voice came out as more of a mumble, but you know Ruggie heard you. He has good ears.

He stood up and grinned, rubbing the back of his neck with two towels and some clothes rolled up inside of them, “Oh, you think so? Shyheehee, my cute underclassman thinks I’m cool!” He was teasing you, but the butterflies in your stomach didn’t account for that. Your mouth went dry and he nudged you with the back of his hand, guiding you to follow him.

The neighborhood kind of grows on you. Several kids ran up to Ruggie, all of them sporting the too-big ears that you often see on wild hyena pups and very shaggy hair. They cheer and dance around him and he takes it in stride, waving them off with the same thing his grandmother told you two, that he stinks and needs to take a shower. The kids all intermittently say that the water is probably going to be cold by now, but Ruggie shrugs.

You’re not mad about that. It’s honestly fine. Ruggie pulls you into a somewhat creepy, kind of large stall, and you can see a rather frightening-looking dead moth underneath the dividing wall. There’s no way that the water reaches all the way to the opposite wall, but it kind of makes sense, since there’s only tile just in front of the two shower heads before it transitions to the same wood that the stall walls are made of. There’s hooks on the wall opposite the shower heads, with nice little baskets underneath them. The heavy wooden stall door is locked securely. It’s a little strange that the wall with the door is a full-length wall, but the walls adjacent to it, other than the shower wall itself, only come down part way. There’s no roof.

When you turn back to Ruggie, he’s already hung up the towels, put the new clothing down, and is buck ass naked and fiddling with the shower controls. You stifle a gasp and his ear swivels towards you.

“Everything okay?” He asks, ever so innocently.

You are the one being weird. What’s a shower with your close friend? Nothing is going to happen. So you stripped down as well, stepping towards Ruggie as the water turned on. 

As soon as the water touched you, you squealed. It was, quite literally, a jet of freezing cold water on your bare ass. Ruggie bursts into raucous laughter and lathers his hair like the cold water doesn’t even bother him.

It took you a moment to get acclimated. There was a rattling at the stall door and Ruggie didn’t even bother turning around as he rinsed his hair, his hands keeping the water out of his ears, “Ocupado!”

Whoever was on the other side didn’t move until Ruggie walked over to get his towel, a kind of unimpressed look on his face aimed towards the door. The shadow under the door retreats and you bring your shower to an end and dry off as well. Ruggie leaned against the door, clad in a pair of loose shorts and a kind of baggy shirt, waiting on you. He’s been very long suffering with you, thus far, but he’s very easygoing, so you’re unsure if you can do much to change that. Not that you want to.

He’s offered you some of his own clothing, to borrow. Most of his stuff is a bit… the wrong size? So you can wear it comfortably enough. He’s not bulked up or incredibly tall like Jack, so it’s a nice, cool change to your school uniform that fits you well enough.

He smiled as you approached him, sighing airily as he grabbed your hand, “Ah, I feel so refreshed after that! Usually I get water in my ears, but I guess you’re my lucky charm today, shyeheehee!”

“I bet that’s even less pleasant when your hearing is so good.” You supplemented, politely making conversation.

Ruggie shrugged, lifting his arm to rest his hand in his wet hair, “Eh, it’s not that bad. Now, a bug flying in there is a completely different story.”

“Oh, I bet. I wish I could wiggle my ears like you can.” You’ve always admired Ruggie’s ears, but not really because you wanted to have your own look like that. You just thought they were a friendly shape. Ruggie’s honestly very cute.

He gave you a pleasant, closed-lipped smirk and opened the door to his home. It smelled amazing in there. Ruggie wandered to the bedroom and you followed the smell. Vita grinned at you as you entered. She’s got a gap in her front teeth, and cute little fangs like Ruggie has.

“You’re just in time, kiddo! Ruggie come back with you?”

“Uh… yes?”

She giggles, much like her grandson, and plates up the creamy-looking pasta, “Well, you better go get ‘em.”

You had no idea where to look, but you obediently went looking regardless. Your search through a dark house was not particularly fruitful. The lights didn’t turn on for you, as you have zero magical ability, so you crept through the house. This house is not particularly large, and as you walked, you made a mental map, of sorts. The main hallway opens into the living area, which is attached to the kitchen. The kitchen has two entrances, one that goes into the hallway and the other that is attached to the living area. In the hallway, there is at least one door. As you feel around for the second one, you stumble blindly into a dark room because there was no door. Your toes hurt from the way you stumbled. You regained your balance, and after taking a step, you heard a soft click, which made your blood freeze. You went stiff, waiting for a second click or some other noise, and then something touched your back and you shrieked.

Ruggie took a couple steps away from you, raising his hands as you shot him a nasty look.

“Where were you?” You frowned.

He simply laughed and grabbed your hand, guiding you back to the kitchen. Vita was waiting, patient as can be. She smiled and took a seat. Ruggie followed suit, and you followed Ruggie.

As you ate- which, by the way, was amazing even though you were certain the meat came from a zebra because it tasted gamey- you listened in on the conversation that Vita and Ruggie shared. You felt like a bystander, but a welcome one. This was a pocket of domesticity, despite how unusual it felt to be here.

“So, how’s school going, whelp?” Vita asks between bites.

Ruggie swallows and tilts his head so he can look at his grammy as he shovels food into his mouth, “It’s going okay. No trouble.”

“Mmm. You’re getting good grades?”

“Of course.”

You quietly ate as Vita’s eyes turned to you. Her eyes narrowed as she smiled, flicking between you and her grandson, “And you scored yourself a nice partner. They’re so polite!”

Ruggie coughed, then sat up a lot straighter than you’ve ever seen him sit up, “Uh, heh- Grammy, we aren’t dating.”

“You aren’t? What a shame. Maybe things’ll change soon.”

It was your turn to cough. You choked and a noodle came out of your nose. Ruggie and Vita just stared as you intensely wished to be anywhere but your seat at the table, and then Ruggie, very gently, incredibly gingerly, pulled the noodle out of your nose. It burned, but not as bad as the embarrassment, but Vita and Ruggie went back to eating as though that didn’t happen at all.

After dinner is over, Ruggie washed the dishes and you dried them. He kept laughing to himself. 

“What’s so funny?” As soon as the words left your mouth, you wished you could take them back.

Ruggie glanced up at you, those pretty sky-after-rain eyes narrowed in mirth, and then he did not mention the noodle incident at all, instead pointing at the little knob of bone that was inside the zebra steak earlier on a single plate. It’s fully cooked.

“Grammy left it out, ‘cause you’re human. I just thought it was funny.”

“I- I mean, I guess I could have eaten the marrow?” You placed the dishes in their places and Ruggie shrugged.

“Do you want the marrow?” Ruggie asked, a sort of sardonic tone to his voice.

“Not really.”

He nodded, then picked the little bone chunk up and popped it in his mouth. He casually grabbed the plate it was on and washed it. For a moment, you thought he was just sucking the marrow out of the bone, but then a horrible crunch resounded from his jaw and you just stared for a moment.

“Are… you okay?” You asked quietly.

Ruggie politely finished chewing, handing off the now-clean plate to you, and turned around so his back was to the counter, “Yeah.”

Okay. So he just… crunched on a bone. Wonderful. You silently made a note to never put your hand in his mouth and put the final plate away.

There was a comfortable silence as Ruggie stared out the window, and then he broke it, “So typically, Grammy takes one cot while I take the other. Do you want your own cot?”

“What?”

“To sleep on.” His lips quirked into a smile and you blinked a couple times.

“I don’t need my own cot. I usually sleep with Grim on my head anyway.”

Ruggie nodded and covered his chin with his knuckles as he snickers, “Shyeheeheehee! Well, I’m not as cute or compact as Grim, but if you want, we can share a cot.”

The two of you already shared a shower. Sharing a cot is honestly something of a step down, “That’s fine.”

Ruggie gives you that soothing grin and grabs your hand, “Promise I’m not a sleep fighter like Grammy. Let’s get to bed. Tomorrow I wanna give you the grand tour.”

So, of course you found yourself lying against Ruggie as he quietly snored. His grammy doesn’t snore, but you actually couldn’t tell if she was asleep or not. Before the two of you laid down to go to sleep, it was mutually and silently agreed that neither of you wanted to be a spoon, so you decided to lie shoulder to shoulder, but Ruggie is apparently a bit of a sleep cuddler, since as soon as he fell asleep, you were bundled against his chest. 

You weren’t really complaining. Ruggie is a piece of shit and emotionally intelligent, so you harbor the belief that he knows. You weren’t really subtle about your affection for him, but you weren’t overt either. You would share your lunch with him. You would forage on your down time, just hoping to catch a glimpse of him but often bumping into Jade. Whenever Crewel decided to have a shadowing class, where you had to look at what your upperclassmen were doing, you’d go to Ruggie’s side as soon as humanly possible. And now, here you were, having decided to stay the whole week of spring break with a guy who probably saw you as some kind of younger sibling.

Oh well. You closed your eyes and heard that clicking noise again. You sat up and Ruggie’s eyes opened, but you didn’t really think he was awake, since they closed after a moment of him staring through where you were. It was that thing that you’ve seen so many animals do. Grim did that too. It’s that protective thing that animals do when something slightly disturbs their rest. You had the thin hope that you didn’t fully wake him up as you stared into the darkness near the doorway. There was nothing there, and you’re not stupid enough to go wandering into the dark and chasing a noise. You laid back down, shutting your eyes as your head rested on Ruggie’s arm and shoulder.

Sleep didn’t come easy. It hadn’t ever since you ended up in Twisted Wonderland. You attributed this to the stress, honestly. You dreamt about the darkness, spreading like ink through cloth. It bleeds into the world around you and you see it crawling up your feet and ankles, as though you’re a ragdoll, something soft and made of cloth and being tainted. When it reaches your elbows, you felt something heavy in your stomach, bringing you to your knees. The ink crawled up your shoulders, to your neck, and your mouth opened, darkness spewing out of the depths of your very being. As you looked up into the dark sky, you had a resounding, loud thought within your dream, “Is this what overblotting feels like?”

You woke up to the sound of sniffling and someone shushing someone else, as well as a soft, rolling massage against the base of your ear. As you woke a bit more, you realize that you were the one crying, and Ruggie’s hand is massaging your neck as he shushed you like he was talking to a distraught child. 

“Shh, shh… It’s okay, you’re alright.” He whispers.

You rolled onto your back and looked up at the sunlight coming through the window, then back at Ruggie’s soft smile. Your head hurt, “What…?”

“You were crying in your sleep. Are you okay?”

“Oh. Yeah. I’m good.”

Ruggie very obviously didn’t believe you, but he moved back and Vita appeared in the doorway, holding a steaming cup. She smiled and passed it down to Ruggie, who passed it to you.

It’s just hot water, but it’s relaxing and your headache eased as you sipped it, offering a sheepish grin to Ruggie and Vita, “Sorry. The… The crying doesn’t usually happen.”

Ruggie tilted his head and Vita’s ears flicked as she sighed. Both of them are wearing different clothing, Vita was wearing a sleeveless shirt and a pair of loose khaki shorts and Ruggie was wearing a sports jersey and a pair of basketball pants. 

Vita mumbled something about getting to work and left the room, and Ruggie placed a hand on your wrist. His hands were warm and he tilted his head, his voice soft, not even above a whisper as he gently squeezed your arm.

“You’re safe. With me, you’re safe.” He let go and stood up, stretching with a little whoop on his tongue, “Well, lemme find you something to wear. We gotta go soon!”

You stood up as well, far more comfortable in the house now that the shadows clung strictly to the corners of the walls and behind the doors, and took your still-warm, empty cup to the kitchen sink. You washed it, drying and putting it away before you returned and Ruggie promptly passed off a bundle of clothing to you and tweaked your nose.

“I’ll be right outside, okay? Shyeheeheehee, don’t have a heart attack without me.” He slumps out of the room.

Ruggie is a chronic sloucher. You thought it was kind of funny, really. He’d look a lot taller if he stood straight, but it was kind of cute. He doesn’t walk, he lopes. It’s cute.

You paused your fuzzy thoughts as you pulled the sweatpant shorts up your legs to shoot a look at the window. You could have sworn that you saw something from the corner of your eye. You stared at the window a moment longer, then quickly finished dressing, putting on the old tank top that Ruggie lent you.

You left the room in a bit of a haste, slamming into Ruggie. The impact knocked both of you down and Ruggie shot back up to help you up.

“Hey, what’s the matter? Are you okay?”

“I, uh, I saw something in the window?” It sounded stupid when you said it. You swallowed and shook your head, “Nevermind, I- it’s stupid, I’m just… seeing things.”

“It’s not stupid.” Ruggie reassured you, a smile on his face as he grabbed your arm to steady you, “You’ve got to trust your eyes and ears, right? What’d you see?”

You shook your head, “I didn’t get a good look.”

Ruggie nodded so understandingly that you almost burst into tears, his hand snaking down your arm so he could grasp your hand, “Alright. That’s fine. C’mon, I gotta show you around. You’re gonna feel something today, shyeheeheehee!”

You followed him around as he showed you the neighborhood. It’s actually rather large, considering. He explained that this section was mostly hyena beastmen, which might have been why you felt so freaked out at first. A lot of the littler neighbors, the kids, were more or less nocturnal. It’s a thing they grow out of as they adjust their schedules to tasks that usually operate during the day. The dim haze in the area persists, despite it being broad daylight out. 

Ruggie showed you to the showers again, then to the somewhat sparse community garden, where Vita happened to be. She waved and Ruggie squeezed your hand as the two of you waved back. A lot of these houses were falling apart, plenty of the neighbors wandering around looking overworked and overtired. You noticed some older kids, the human one looking kind of familiar with shaggy blond hair and green eyes while the other has black-streaked brown hair and hyena features and wide brown eyes, getting into a fist fight. You took a step forward to stop them and Ruggie stopped you with a hand on your belly.

“It’s fine. They’ll figure it out themselves. C’mon.” He led you away.

That didn’t sit well in your stomach, but this was Ruggie’s turf. Who knew? Maybe you’d have gotten stabbed by one of those kids. Anything can happen.

A chill runs up your back and you look around, noticing a man leaning against the shower stalls. You furrowed your brow and Ruggie turned to look at whatever had caught your eye.

“What is it?” He asked.

You shook your head. It wasn’t worth making a big fuss about some dude just minding his business. Ruggie showed you some kind of herb shed next? It was kind of hard to explain, but top to bottom, it was drying racks for herbs and mushrooms. And almost everything else is either houses or someone else’s property.

“What do you think?” He asked you with a kind of lopsided grin. 

“It’s not what I was expecting,” You admitted. This place was a part of Ruggie, of course it was, and even though this place wasn’t perfect, you don’t imagine the guy you have a crush on would be who he is without it, so you tack on, “It’s very home-like. People working together for the community. Plus, those were some really bomb herbs.”

Ruggie’s grin turns into a beaming smile and he tilts his head, his fist coming up to his chin as his shoulders jerk and he contains his giggle, “Shyeheehee, that’s big, coming from you. Well, since we’re up, we better get moving. There’s a nice little spot over there and I’d bet that there’s something worth foraging there.”

“I can forage!” The words spilled out of your mouth, making your cheeks burn, but Ruggie laughed it off, tweaking your nose again.

“I know that. C’mon.”

Ruggie walked off, and you followed him, that prickle on the back of your neck fading as you entered what seemed like an oasis in the middle of the desolate land that everyone lived in. There were a couple little kids napping in the two trees, two to a branch. You didn’t think he had seen them at first, but as he scanned the ground, Ruggie called up to them.

“Your parents wouldn’t be too happy if any of you fell.” He said, his tone rather neutral. 

The kids groaned but filed down the trunks regardless. There were eight of them, six girls and two boys. They’re all skinny and dirty, and a couple of them are tugging on their ears, a couple others sucking on their thumbs, some of them doing both. They’re the cutest little things you’ve ever seen. 

Ruggie spread his hands, “Not in the mood to play today, guys? Shyeheehee, I would think a bunch of active kids like you would be running around like crazy!”

All of the kids shook their heads, one of them, a sort of tall girl with her hair cropped short, spoke up, leaning back and forth with her arms limp in a dramatic display of exasperation, “No. It’s too hot today, Ruggie.”

“Too hot?” Ruggie said, sort of exaggeratedly.

You piped in, “Well, this area doesn’t have any scary crocodiles or whatever. How about hide and seek? Ruggie and I will look while we’re foraging, and you guys can go hide.”

Ruggie shot you an alarmingly pleased smile and nodded, “Shyeheehee, of course. But if we find you, you gotta help us find the rest of you… and help us forage.”

The kids didn’t seem very impressed. You smiled, “It beats doing nothing, doesn’t it?”

They seemed to concede, more or less, and you turned around to face one of the trees and started counting while Ruggie started looking for good forage. 

Once you got to twenty, all of the kids were gone. You walked over to Ruggie, who stood up, holding what appeared to be some kind of onion or leek, and nudged you with a dirt-covered hand. “Quick thinking.”

“Not really.”

Ruggie smirks and hunches back down, “Well, if you wanna go look for kids while I grab these onions, you can go ahead.”

Ruggie didn’t correct you when you said that this area wasn’t dangerous, so you chose to believe the implication. You wandered casually around the bushes, spotting four of the littler kids almost immediately. One of the boys fashioned a sort of breathing tube from a chunk of dried reed, but he seemed to forget that water is see-through, so when you reached in he jumped out of the pond and stomped his foot, shaking the water from his ears as he pouted. 

So, now that you had a troupe of five kids following you like ducklings, you wander towards the edge of the oasis. From where you stood, you could see that one of the boys and another girl had gotten bored and decided to help Ruggie dig up onions, but were mostly just making mud castles, which left just the big girl.

There weren’t really many places for a gangly kid to hide, but you looked up and, sure enough, you spotted her. You grin and point up at her.

“Alright, found you! But you won!”

The big girl doesn’t respond at all. She was staring away from you, into the brush and bramble. She just stares into it, flinching as the sound of a twig snapping crackles through the silent and still air. She quickly dropped down and cowered against your side. Children are familiar little creatures and can make friends as easily as breathing, so you weren’t entirely shocked by that, but her tail wagged once and the other five kids rushed towards where Ruggie was. You hold her as close as you can with mobility and rushed back toward Ruggie again.

Once you’re near Ruggie once more, you bent down and looked into the kid’s eyes, “What’s the matter?”

She looked up at you, her right ear twitching towards the direction she was staring in, and very solemnly whispered, “I heard someone in the leaves, new friend.”

You nodded, just as seriously, and squatted down so you could get more on her level, “I believe you. But I bet it was just someone looking for something good to eat later, like us. Are you still feeling hot?”

She nodded slowly and swiveled her torso side to side.

You smiled at her and tilted your head towards the gaggle of other kids all playing in the mud, “Your family might make you clean up before you go inside, but I bet that mud is nice and cold… And it makes some really nice castles.”

She gave you a sort of blank look and a soft little smile lit her face before she went over to bury her hands in the mud as well. You watched her go, Ruggie’s eyes catching yours in the corner of your vision. Was he watching you?

By the time the sun was high in the sky, Ruggie seemed satisfied with all the forage that you had collected, and the kids were sleepy and ready to go back to their respective homes. Whatever the big girl had seen in the bushes never showed itself.

That didn’t change the uneasiness that settled in your gut as you looked back towards the oasis. The kids ran ahead with Ruggie, who laughed and dodged their filthy little hands, and you cast one last look at the oasis.

You didn’t see anything. It was all greenery against the dim sky, nothing but green and the murky blue of the sky.

The sound of your name pulled you out of your staring, and you turned to see Ruggie standing a little ways away. He gave you a very sweet, concerned look, his eyes wide and ears pointed towards you. 

You shook your head and walked towards him. He was using his shirt as a makeshift basket, humming to himself as he led you back to the neighborhood.

Once the two of you got back, he put you on veggie-washing duty again while he made a quick roux. 

“Ahhh, what a good haul! I told those kids to come by later to get some soup. This is gonna be so good!” Ruggie sighed, very obviously pleased with himself.

“Oh? This is a lot of onions.”

“Yeah. We’re making onion soup. Don’t worry, it won’t be too pungent, shyeheehee!”

You heard the end of your sentence before you managed to register what you said, “Well, just don’t kiss me after you eat this.”

As soon as the sentence is punctuated, you paused, your movements halted entirely as your muscles locked and you glanced at Ruggie from the corner of your eye. The discomfort of stretching your eyes in that direction without turning your head made the whole thing more embarrassing. 

You let out a stilted laugh, “Uh, well, haha, I don’t- I mean-”

“Do you want me to kiss you?” There had to have been a shit eating grin on Ruggie’s face. You weren’t looking at him, but you can hear it in his voice, “Shyeheeheehee, my cute underclassman wants me to kiss them?”

That had you turning to face him, just in time for him to lean up on his toes and plant a kiss on your forehead. And then he laughed and turned back to his roux.

You liked Ruggie. He was a piece of shit, but he was emotionally intelligent, so you were certain he knew. As you carefully chopped up the wild onions and Ruggie stirred in some kind of broth and the other already chopped foraged vegetables, you thought about how you could still feel his lips on your forehead despite him standing several feet away from you. Being around him made you feel like a total space-case, your head floating up in the stars and the clouds, looking at the way the world glitters. Your feet were on the ground, of course, but you felt lighter when you were near him. 

These thoughts carry you as you took a seat next to Ruggie after the soup was done. You sat on a blanket that one of the kids brought over. One of the other kids managed to convince their mom to let them bring some bread out to enjoy the soup with, so in the center of your circle sat a chipped old porcelain plate with a small stack of sliced, white bread on it. The kids all chattered between themselves and Ruggie, but you were stuck, thinking about how soft his lips were on your forehead and how nice he always was to you. Perhaps it was just a habit for him to always be polite, but politeness didn’t usually consist of someone inviting you to stay spring break in their hometown. 

You tapped your fingertips on your forehead and the big girl from earlier tugged on your elbow.

“Friend, can you go get me just a little, itty bitty piece of sage? Please?” She asked, her bottom lip poking out.

You glanced at Ruggie, who shrugged and nodded, so you ruffled her hair and smiled, “Yeah, okay.”

The herb shed isn’t that far away. It’s out of sight of the picnic blanket, which did kind of frighten you, but you weren’t as freaked out as you were the first night. You opened the shed and jumped in fright as someone cleared their throat behind you. 

It’s that guy who you noticed earlier during Ruggie’s tour. He gave you a broad smile, the dim sunlight shining off of his bald head. He’s more ape than hyena. You offered him a polite smile and stepped to the side, holding a shriveled up sage leaf. The man didn’t enter the shed, simply looking at you.

“Hard out here for us.” He said.

You didn’t know what that meant. The way the man’s kind-looking eyes stared through you was disturbing, so you laughed awkwardly, “Uh… yeah. I’ll get out of your way.”

He nodded and you returned to the blanket. You couldn’t see the shed from where you were sitting, but you could almost still feel the strange man’s eyes on you.

You finished eating and helped clean up. You nearly dropped a bowl and Ruggie looked kind of concerned, but didn’t say anything about it. As you just stood there after putting away the last of the dishes and the kids all ran off, Ruggie rested his knuckles on your forehead.

“You’re kind of warm. C’mon, let’s hit the showers.”

“Oh, okay.”

Just like the first night but far more comfortable, you showered with Ruggie. The water was lukewarm this time, so it was a lot nicer, and after you got out, you did feel a lot cooler. The sun was low in the sky, just resting on the horizon. Ruggie grabbed your hand, squeezing it as the two of you walked back to his home.

Vita was back by now, but she had a few other ladies in the living area playing a card game. You stood by, idly, listening as they talked about Ruggie with him right there, asking him about sports but not listening to his answers, really. Vita’s eyes laser-focused on your hand in his and she shot you a grin before going back to scowling at her deck of cards.

About as soon as you got back to the bedroom, you noticed that you forgot your borrowed shorts.

“Ruggie, I forgot something.” You said, stowing the rest of the clothes.

Ruggie gave you a wide-eyed look and turned back to dressing up the cot, “Alright. You should hurry and go get them then. Grammy’s gonna be out tonight, so it’ll just be us.”

You were a bit curious, but you went back out to the showers. The sky was that same pitch black that it was on the first night, and as you walked, you felt those prickles on the back of your neck, like you were being followed. You looked behind you as you got to the showers. The single, weak lamp in front of the stall felt useless in the dark like this. You grabbed the balled-up shorts and stepped out of the safety of the light and into the inky blackness of the night.

Almost immediately, you felt like you were suffocating. It was like your nightmare. You could see a little bit in front of you, the moon affording you just the outline of the buildings. You tripped over your own feet as you stumbled into a run and returned to find Ruggie’s home completely dark.

You took a deep breath and reassured yourself that he had just decided to go to bed before you got back. Your hand presses against the wall as you walk, the only way for you to tell where you’re headed. Something in that room made a soft clicking noise. You froze for a moment.

When your blood stopped roaring in your ears, you whispered, “Ruggie?”

There was no response. A pressure against your back, like a weighted blanket and a harsh grip on your chin prevented you from trying to call out for Ruggie again. Your silent assailant swiveled and turned you so you’re facing the now open door.

You recognized the silhouette, the friendly shaped ears and messy hair, the sort of gangly build with the skinny limbs, but it’s his eyes that made your heart beat faster.

You didn’t know he had these. Tapetum lucidum, the lining in the back of his eyes that gives him a biologic advantage over stupid creatures that can’t see in the dark. It made for an eerie sight, though. He was a shadow standing in the door with two bright green, glowing dots for eyes. You wondered if this is what prey animals felt like when they saw wild dogs. He raised his hands up to put them behind his head, just a shadow in movement, and let out a big sigh.

“Grammy’s gonna be real mad if you get blood and whatever all over her floors. Let’s take this outside.”

The calm tone of Ruggie’s voice paired with his rather jarring appearance set a pit in your stomach. You couldn’t stop the sob that punched out of your chest.

You sounded as betrayed as you felt. “Ruggie? What’s-”

The man holding you clubbed you with something harder than a fist and dragged you out of the house, following Ruggie.

You cried the whole time. You didn’t even know where they were taking you, but this felt worse than a usual betrayal. You thrashed and sobbed and begged, only getting a quiet, “Knock it off,” from Ruggie’s direction.

You knew. You knew Ruggie was a duplicitous little snotbag and that he would eventually crush your heart in one way or another, but this is not the way you wanted. You wanted him to hurt you in a way that meant you could still be friends, where he told you that he didn’t see you the same way, where he tweaked your nose and watched as you cried. Not like this, not being dragged off by some stranger to who knows where. Your bawling was cut short by Ruggie clicking on a light and you being unceremoniously dumped on the floor.

You rolled over and shot the individuals looming above you the dirtiest look you could manage. Of course, one of them is Ruggie, staring down at you with the light above his head almost mockingly making him appear like a heavenly being. One of his eyes looks like it usually does, only a bit more dim, while the other only has that reflective lining in the back of the pupil visible, that eerie green glow pinned onto your face. The other individual is the bald man from earlier. You appeared to be in a sort of shed-like building. There was a shelf, casting the absence of light over you, as though you’d been covered in paint and left to rot.

Two shadowed figures and shadows below. It’s similar enough to your dream, the one where the darkness swallowed you whole.

Ruggie nudged the man with his elbow and held out his palm, his fingers waving back until the man dropped a stack of cash in it.

Your heart pumped so hard you could feel it in your throat and stomach simultaneously, “You sold me?”

“No.” Ruggie responded, flicking through the wad of money, “Just your organs.”

As if it wasn’t crushing enough. Your lips parted and your eyes were dry, but you felt as though a bucket of ice had just been dumped over your head. The bald man’s grin looked silver in this light as he angled his hand to reveal a standard kitchen knife, glinting in the shitty light of this shed and primed to slice into you.

You couldn’t take your eyes off of Ruggie as the man squatted down to sit on your stomach, couldn’t look away as the man crushed your windpipe with his giant hand.

You couldn’t stop looking at Ruggie as he leaned against the wall to watch for a moment, then cleared his throat and stood up straight, as though he was putting on a show for you in your final moments. Your vision was spotting out, considering that the bald guy was strangling you, but Ruggie spread his arms and grinned.

His voice was startlingly loud, overshadowing the sound of your own pulse as you struggled to breathe, “Both kings and hyenas are my friends! Laugh With Me!”

The man on top of you stiffened, then his hand on your neck relaxed as he sat up, his free hand joining the one on his knife as he raised the blade above his head.

As you stared up at the stranger, the creases in his jacket creating splotches of shadow that hid more of his face from your view, you tried to quickly come up with a way to brace yourself for the pain you would soon experience. Betrayal and heartbreak are not the same as getting your ribcage cracked open, not that you had extensive experience with one or the other. You squirmed, trying to get your arms out from under the man atop you, your eyes glued to the light streaked along the knife. The looming figure of the man atop you is stiff, and… you saw Ruggie doing much of the same from the corner of your eye.

For a moment, you thought that this is maybe what you deserve. You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes. You grow a festering affection for someone without integrity, he sells your organs and kills you so he doesn’t have to watch the guy supposed to be doing the job choke you to death. You let another powerful sob punch out of your chest and writhe, shutting your eyes so you don’t get tears in your ears from crying on your back.

You heard a dull noise. Kind of like a slab of meat getting cut, or someone putting their hand into a bag of pudding. Maybe the two of those noises combined. You waited for the pain, because you could feel something warm spreading along the base of your ribs. Maybe it just didn’t really hurt when you got stabbed. You’d be willing to accept that.

There was a moment before you opened your eyes. The first thing you saw was the terror in the bald man’s eyes as he sat on top of you. He sputtered and blood sprayed over your face. It cools on your face as you gape up at him. His knife is buried in his own gut.

In the still moment, you heard a quiet little laugh. It bounced off the walls until you couldn’t hear anything but the laughter. You turned your head and noticed Ruggie, his hands pressed fist to fist to abdomen, his face stretched in a hellish grin as he cackled. You can still only see one of his eyes clearly, the other still that little dot of reflection, a glowing green facet, looking right at you. His laughter calmed as he looked at you, a serene smile replacing the maddened grin he was wearing moments before. He made a quick jerking motion, pulling his hands up so his hands rested at the base of his own ribs, still holding an invisible knife. 

The man atop you spluttered again, pitching forward a bit as his blood gushed over you. It got in your eyes and nose, covered your mouth and ears, tainting your perception with a bitter copper coating. 

Ruggie theatrically threw his invisible knife to one side and tilted to the other. You weren’t sure if it was the motion Ruggie started or if it was the man just being dead, but you attacker hit the ground hard, the knife skittering to a stop on the other side.

The human body is fascinating. It always has been. You, having had a degree of understanding, thanks to being born into such a form, weren’t prepared at all to have a man disembowel himself while sitting on top of you. The sight set you into a hysteria. 

You could hear your own breathing, the reedy gasps for air you sucked in as you stared at the bald man’s organs and blood spreading across the floor. In all the scientific diagrams, they looked so different. The lungs were red, the heart was pink, the intestines were orange and purple. The diagrams lied to you, or perhaps you were too stupid to realize that the very simple vector diagrams that you’d always seen were color coded for your ease. The slick sacks of flesh spilling onto the ground before you with their sheen of blood were all varying shades of flesh. No bright colors, just peaches and reds and pinks, a thick, puss-looking yellow being tainted on the sides of the gash. Adipose resembles lemon curd, sort of. You could hear soft footsteps coming towards you. You had nearly forgotten Ruggie was here, even though he was the very maker of this nightmare. You felt one of his hands turning you over, rolling you so you were looking up at him.

The smile on his face was so sweet and kind, the type of smile you’d expect to see on a kid who had just gotten a kitten for their birthday. He brushed a hand along your hairline, his eyebrows furrowing. It made him look concerned. 

“Did you really think I’d trade you for money?” His smile took on an uncanny, eerie edge, and his eyes narrowed, “Shyeehee, maybe I should become an actor.”

You didn’t respond, staring up at him as he helped you sit up. He pressed a hand against your collarbone, sighing at the sanguine dampness left on his hand afterwards.

“Aw, that guy made such a mess. Don’t worry, we can take another shower.” Ruggie curled one of his arms around your shoulders, the opposite hand tilting your chin so he could look at your face. “I bet you’re pretty mad, huh?”

“Wh-What… why did you…?”

“I didn’t. The man who paid me for your organs has had his sights on you since we got here. Guess he got cursed or something and needed a fresh human heart.” Ruggie wrinkled his nose before smiling at you again, his fangs looking even sharper in this low light, “Grammy even noticed him. So yesterday morning, before you woke up, I tracked him down and made a little deal. He gets you, but I wanted to watch. Of course I was gonna just bleed him dry, shyeheeheehee!”

You had no idea what to say to that. You stared at Ruggie and he leaned close, his lips brushing against yours for a moment. The blood transferred from you to him resembled a kind of sick, clumpy lipgloss. Knowing that it’s blood makes it all far worse.

Ruggie sighed and leaned against you, still crouched beside you as you lay partially sprawled on the dusty floor, trying not to think about the dead body less than a foot away from you. His cheek pressed against your forehead, and he sighed again.

“Of course I couldn’t go through with it.” He almost sounded like he was more so talking to himself than to you, “You’ll always be safe with me.”

[tricoufamily]

🔪rogues gallery legacy challenge 🔪

i'm misleading you most of them aren't even criminals

ok!!! so i made this challenge for myself because i can't commit to any save, but i'll definitely want to play with these sims it's got autism sprinkled all over it. some of you might also like it as well so i'll share it!

this is a ten generation legacy challenge, with every generation loosely based on a different batman villain, but you don't have to be a batman fan to do it.

general rules

start with the default amount of money you get straight out of cas. no money cheats!

heirs can be any gender with any appearance. i think it'd be fun to dress them inspired by the character, but you don't have to. you probably don't want to make the actual character, honestly (what, ivy marries harley, then a few generations later there's just another harley? no)

choose your own succession laws

if you don’t have the pack for the requirement, replace it with whatever is a logical replacement. or just do something else instead, i’m not gonna come through your computer

i have provided alternate requirements when necessary for people who don’t want to play with occult sims

when stated that the sim goes to university, i recommend turning off aging until they graduate. sims without a university requirement can still attend!

if you end up doing this, please tag me in your posts 💜 or at least tell me how it's going in an ask lol

1: poison ivy 🌱

people say you’re a bit intense about the environment, but you say people are too stupid to see what’s right in front of them. the world clearly needs your help, but no one understands you. people quickly disappoint you when you get close to them. they voted against the clean energy production n.a.p.—why shouldn’t their spouse find out about that secret date you had?

stats:

traits: green fiend, hot-headed, loves outdoors aspiration: villainous valentine career: gardener (botanist branch) max skills: gardening, herbalism, flower arranging

requirements:

live in any world but strangerville (it doesn’t have an eco footprint!). make every neighborhood in the world have a green eco footprint—this means you’ll have to live in all of them at some point. big worlds recommended.

get the super green thumb bonus trait from the aspiration rewards store.

leave someone at the altar.

eventually end up with your best friend who’s already in a relationship.

have 3 cowplants. if one of them dies, remove 1000 simoleons as punishment and replace it. what you do with them is your business.

2: scarecrow 👻

between moving constantly, being terrified of the man-eating plants outside your window, and your parent's reputation preceding them, you fantasize about the control you’ve lacked your whole life. you loved creating monstrosities with your chemistry set as a child, and when you finally escape your town for college, your mind leads you to dark places. you evade consequences until your scheming backfires, and you’re haunted for the rest of your life by a terrifying specter your family can’t see.

stats:

traits: paranoid, genius, ambitious aspiration: purveyor of potions (non-occult alternative: academic) career: education (professor branch)/scientist (for non-occult route) max skills: mental skill, mixology skill, cooking skill

requirements:

gain and conquer every adult fear.

go to the university of britechester and major in psychology. join a secret society.

become a spellcaster. feed hexed potions to 5 sims and use negative spells on 10 sims. non-occult alternative: instead of becoming a professor, join the scientist career, and with the sim ray, use the mind control: panic upgrade on all coworkers.

after college, move to another world than where your parent lives.

become cursed with the curse of the night wraith (you may cheat for it if you can’t get it). live 3 days with it then you can de-curse yourself, but not before adding the night wraith to your household (requires cheats). obviously you can’t stop your family from interacting with it autonomously, but never initiate an interaction yourself while playing as another family member. non-occult alternative: use a ghost instead and you can pretend it’s just a figment of your sim’s imagination.

3: riddler 🧩

with your parent who hasn’t slept in days claiming your house is cursed, you drown it out with the internet and video games. your social skills might not be up to par because of it, but you’re a genius the likes of which has never been seen before. according to you, at least. you aren’t easy to get along with, but neither is one of your exes, whose path you just can’t stop crossing. try as you might, you can’t stay away from each other for very long.

stats:

traits: geek, socially awkward, self-absorbed aspiration: chief of mischief career: tech guru (start-up entrepreneur branch) max skills: mischief, robotics, logic

requirements:

as a teen, be in the streamer part-time career. have at least 500 followers on social media.

have a sim you’re dating die.

your “forever partner” has the hot-headed and mean trait. break up and get back together with them 4 times.

successfully hack supercomputer 3 times.

woohoo a servo. at least once

4: harley quinn ♦

you might never be a fully mature person, but that’s okay! you’re a free spirit—a bit unpredictable and fickle, but you’re fun! your parent’s dream is for you to go to foxbury, but one night out drinking with your roommates, you fall head over heels for a mysterious, charismatic stranger at the bar. you very quickly decide to follow them to the city, only to realize that they aren’t who you thought they were, and maybe you’re not who you thought you were, either. you end the relationship and truly find yourself.

stats:

traits: goofball, childish, romantic aspiration: leader of the pack career: doctor max skills: mischief, comedy

requirements:

start a club with your two best friends.

have an equal number of friends and enemies

briefly live on the foxbury campus, majoring in biology. fall in love with a criminal sim with all negative traits, drop out of college, and move in with them in a needs tlc apartment.

work a number of odd jobs and part-time careers while your relationship deteriorates.

break up with your partner, move out on your own, and go back to college. do not live on campus this time—continue working a part-time job while living at home. become a doctor.

5: clayface 🎭

your parent never took life very seriously, but you couldn’t be more different. not only are you fiercely competitive, you have to be liked by everyone. you’re a social chameleon who dreams of the stage. you’re only a high-maintenance, jealous, hothead—fame certainly won’t go to your head…

stats:

traits: high-maintenance, hot-headed, jealous aspiration: master actor career: actor max skills: acting, charisma

requirements:

live in del sol valley.

have a good reputation until becoming a proper celebrity, then earn a bad reputation.

marry and divorce (at least) 2 actors.

fist-fight 5 costars.

after completing the master actor aspiration, gradually lose all fame.

6: penguin ☂

there’s a lot you can say about your childhood, but you can’t say it wasn’t comfortable. with all the trust fund and nepotism you could ask for, what’s there to lose? oh. oh, wait, this trust fund isn’t bottomless, actually. uh oh. better pick up a couple side hustles to keep the lights on.

stats:

traits: snob, mean, materialistic aspiration: mansion baron career: business career (investor branch) max skills: nectar making, fishing

requirements:

never work a job until young adulthood.

spend all or almost all of your inheritance immediately after moving out (have <1500 simoleons).

start selling nectar and fish on the side.

adopt or have 1 solo science baby. be enemies with all of your neighbors but have a max relationship with your child.

have 5 on-and-off woohoo partners but never a real relationship. once you reach mid-adulthood (not young adulthood), you may marry one of your woohoo partners who’s always secretly been in love with you.

7: mr. freeze 🧊

your eccentric parent doted on you, but school was miserable. at least you had one friend, your best friend. as you got older, you got shy about your developing feelings for them—little did you know, they in love with you too. you got married and everything was perfect. and then they died. you’ll dedicate your entire life to bringing them back, no matter the cost.

stats:

traits: gloomy, perfectionist, family-oriented aspiration: soulmate career: scientist max skills: all skills associated with making ambrosia

requirements:

be disliked by at least 3 classmates as a child/teen and have only 1 friend.

become soulmates with the friend, get married, and move to mt. komorebi. when at least 1 of your children ages up into a child, your spouse dies.

you quit your job to focus solely on making ambrosia to bring your spouse back. you can rejoin the scientist career when this is complete. if you need money, start selling household items.

you become increasingly distant with your child(ren), too focused on your goal. your relationship with them suffers greatly.

you cannot have any romantic relationship with another sim ever. even if your revived spouse can’t forgive you…

8: joker 🤡

when you watch your parent sob while baking ten cakes in a row, saying it’ll bring your other parent back from the dead, the best way to cope is turning it into a stand-up routine, right? you’ve used comedy to mask the darkness in you your whole life. might as well try to profit off it. also, your vampire obsession is kind of off-putting.

stats:

traits: goofball, evil, hates children aspiration: joke star career: entertainer (comedian branch) max skills: comedy, mischief, vampire lore

requirements:

as a child, get a’s in school and be in the drama club. have a forgotten birthday when becoming a teen, the final straw. quit the drama club, become disliked/enemies with all of your friends, and become a d student.

move to san myshuno.

reach a two-star celebrity level from comedy.

never marry and have an accidental child with a fan. all children you have must be accidental. like your parent before you, you cannot connect with your children and have a difficult dynamic with all of them.

have a -100 relationship with a vampire. have a negative interaction at least once a week. non-occult alternative: make it a human goth sim. lmao.

9: two-face 🌗

despite absent parenting, you were voted most likely to succeed in high school and graduated at the top of your class. your goals are simple and attainable: become leader of the free world. but your promising political career is nipped in the bud when your entire life is ruined. disgraced, secluded, and battling two sides of yourself, you turn to other career options.

stats:

traits: self-assured, erratic, overachiever aspiration: goal oriented, public enemy career: politics (politician branch), criminal career (boss branch) max skills: charisma, research & debate

requirements:

as a child, receive a future cube as a gift from a parent. every major decision you make besides the requirements have to be made with the future cube. no takesies backsies.

make all a’s in elementary and high school and win prom royalty.

marry your teenage sweetheart straight out of high school. have only 1 child.

reach level 5 of the politics career, then your sim is turned into either a werewolf or vampire (player’s choice—or flip a coin!) against their will (you’ll have to pretend). non-occult alternative: you’re caught in a cheating scandal that ruins your career.

you’re forced to quit your job, get divorced, move to a non-city world with your child, and join the criminal career.

10: catwoman 🐈

your parent was not an easy person to live with. they may have not minded your habit of stealing from school, but you couldn’t take it anymore. you return to the city with a plan to get rich quick, but you’re no crime boss. you’re doing this on your own terms, playing for nobody’s team but your own. even if someone keeps trying to poke their nose in your family’s business.

stats:

traits: kleptomaniac, cat lover, adventurous aspiration: fabulously wealthy career: retail employee, thief max skills: rock climbing, knitting

requirements:

your non-criminal parent dies before you reach teenhood.

have a gloomy childhood friend you lose touch with in your teen years. as young adults, the friend has become a secret agent investigating your family. they are enemies with your criminal parent. you and the friend also become enemies.

you’re working as a retail employee, but where you’re really getting your money is robbery. initiate 2 romantic relationships with rich sims to rob their house.

eventually become lovers with your friend-turned-enemy.

adopt 3 stray cats.

[tyuninthemirror]

— she looks so perfect: k.th

— pairing: idol!taehyun x model fem!reader — genre: fluff — word count: 1065 — disclaimers: mentions of insecurities, mentions of food. taehyun being too pure for this world. — synopsis: taehyun wasn't biased or anything, but you were the kindest and most beautiful person he has ever met. your insecurities were spiraling out of control and he knew he had to put an end to it. — series masterlist

— author's note: this is by far my most favorite work. i hope you all love it as much as i did ♡

'I am beautiful. I am beautiful.' you repeat over and over in your head as you reach your front door.

Today was a bad day. It was weigh-in, and you got scolded in front of everyone for being a bit bloaty since it was almost your period. Your manager nearly removed you from the line-up for the GENTLE MONSTER BOLD Collection photo shoot, and you overheard one of your 'friends' laughing behind your back in the changing room about your bloating.

You remove the little cooling pack you held under your eyes, sliding them into your pocket and checking your reflection for any apparent signs of crying for the last time before walking into your shared apartment with Taehyun.

"Taehyun-ah, I'm home," you called out, trying to sound as cheerful as possible.

"Welcome home," Taehyun responded, peaking his head from the kitchen. "Dinner is almost ready!"

You're Y/N, a runway model, and though many think you embody perfection, you can't help but be insecure about yourself. There are days like today when you absolutely hate how you look, especially when you're surrounded by models that seem to have it all together, but you try your best to hide it from Taehyun.

"What's up, Y/N? Are you okay?" he asked, concern in his voice as you both sat down to eat the food he had prepared. You don't want to burden him with your problems, so you try to brush it off.

"I'm fine. Just tired from work, that's all," you say with a weak smile.

"Okay," Taehyun said reluctantly. No matter how much you tried to get rid of your puffy eyes, Taehyun could tell you cried a lot. Neither did he miss the way you pretended to eat. He could tell you were pretending to eat for his sake.

Taehyun remembered the first time he met you. When TXT had just debuted, they were invited to Seoul Fashion Week, and you walked for Nike as a newbie model. Beomgyu teased Taehyun endlessly about gaping when he laid his eyes on you. After scoring your number after he snuck backstage, the rest was history. You got together, and Taehyun watched your career grow from a newbie to walking for Anderson Bell in Milan.

The one thing he could never understand was that as your career grew, your insecurity also grew. He watched as you slowly became a shell of the cheerful Y/N you once were, and it broke his heart.

Taehyun had attempted to talk to you several times about your mental health, but you constantly assured him you were okay. He was busy enough as it is. You didn't need him worrying about you.

The last straw for Taehyun was a week later when he walked into the apartment to be met with the sounds of your sobbing.

"Y/N…? What's wrong?" he asked as he placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. You turned around and wrapped your arms around Taehyun, sobbing into his chest. His heart clenched at the sound as he rubbed your back in comfort.

"They're taking me off the Jimmy Choo collection because my pinky toe keeps sticking out of the heels," you managed to say between sobs after a while of Taehyun comforting you.

"Oh no, baby, I'm sorry," Taehyun mumbles, holding you even tighter.

"Why do I have such ugly feet?" you sobbed louder. "No wonder Janey keeps booking shows. She's two sizes smaller than me in everything."

Taehyun's expression softens as he pulls back and cups your face, looking into your eyes. "Y/N, how could you think that? You are absolutely beautiful, and you always have been. I mean, I've seen you in that garbage bag for that weird raincoat collection, and even then, you were stunning."

You can feel the heat rising in your cheeks from embarrassment, but knowing that Taehyun genuinely thinks that about you is a comfort.

"I know you don't think you're ugly or fat. I know you better than that," Taehyun continued as he used his thumb to wipe your tears away. "So don't let other people tell you otherwise. Only your opinion matters."

"Taehyun, it's not that easy," you say, barely above a whisper. "I'm surrounded by these people all the time, and I feel like I'm not good enough."

Taehyun pulls you into his arms again as he feels his eyes stinging, tears threatening to show, your words utterly breaking his heart. You can feel his heart beating against your chest as he tries to hide his tears. "Y/N, you deserve so much better than this. You don't have to put yourself through this kind of stress all the time. You don't have to keep modeling if it's making you feel this way. You deserve to be happy."

You're too stunned to speak. You thought about changing companies or working exclusively for one company but never considered not modeling again.

"But what would I do if I stopped modeling?" you whispered in his ears. You found comfort in how he held you and realized how lucky you are to have Taehyun in your life.

"You could study again? Didn't you say you wanted to take up digital marketing? Or becoming a news anchor? I know how much you like talking about the weather," Taehyun began suggesting. "How about voice acting? I thought you did great voicing that character in the Trolls movie."

"Babe, it was two lines," you chuckled.

"Exactly! And you nailed it," Taehyun defended with so much enthusiasm in his voice that you couldn't hold back your laughter.

"Or…" Taehyun started. "I could buy us plane tickets to Hawaii right now, and we could hide out there for a few days. Sip coconuts on the beach? What do you say?"

"How lucky am I to have someone like you in my life," you sighed, pulling away to look at Taehyun, studying the face of the man you're proud to call your boyfriend.

"You're lucky? Then I must have saved lives in my previous life to be blessed with someone like you."

Taehyun's words make you realize that maybe he's right. Maybe it's time for a change in your life and to distance yourself from the superficial people you've been around lately.

As you lean into his embrace once more, you're grateful to have someone who loves and cares for you, flaws and all.

"I love you, Kang Taehyun."