#and how its basically a v v subtle fuck you to Light

[nightmare-foundation]

You said few months ago to aks your thoughts: what exactly do you mean by "Ozpin has long since given up on his task"?

I agree but don't have any coherent thoughts, except I also kind of think Oscar might've returned a spark to him ("You saved us," Ozpin also fighting the merge in the V9 Epilogue storyboard.)

Honestly this is a bit hard to explain bc I haven't touched RWBY in months (I'm neck deep in a batfamily hyperfixation), so my thoughts on this are VERY scattered, but I'll do my best to explain. I might come back and add any additional thoughts I might have.

Essentially, Ozpin doesn't really act like he's actively working towards his God-given task. Even if he is, I think he's doing the absolute bare minimum required of it. He's clearly tried before- if The Infinite Man is a 100% true story- but he labels that attempt as a mistake several times over. On top of that, he hasn't done... anything with the Relics after The Great War. The world was described as being in a time of 'unprecedented peace'- but Ozpin didn't DO anything with that.

I also think it's safe to assume that doing Lights task probably requires- essentially a cult dedicated to him. This is seen in The Infinite Man, since the woman Oz talks to mentions a 'final judgement', and the antagonist towards the end says that Oz's mere existence makes him a target. So it's safe to assume that pretty much everyone knew about his task at this time, and people didn't like the idea of it. I'm pretty sure it's also stated that this is the closest he's gotten to completing it. But as Ozpin recounts this, he repeatedly says that this was a mistake, and clearly regrets his actions here. He had good intentions, but it didn't matter in the end; the Circle was a mistake and he's asking for forgiveness.

On top of that, he says "Some people worship God's, while others insist we must be our own salvation. But the world doesn't work in absolutes, so why can't it be both?" This coupled with The Gift of the Moon and The Man Who Stared at the Sun as well as The Two Brothers heavily imply Oz believes that Light, or both of the Gods but especially Light, is selfish, petty, and that appeasing him not only requires heavy sacrifice, but hurts everyone else, and that humanity can replace the Gods; they don't need them.

The Academies themselves imply this too- they're safe Havens, Beacons of hope, keeping the world raised to shield them from destruction and providing Shade from the unforgiving sun (Light). They're symbolic, representing Oz's core values/beliefs, and one of those is that humanity needs to be shielded from Light. He very much also supports individuality, if the Great War is anything to go by plus the creation of the Academies. Something that, honestly, I don't think Light very much appreciates.

Also, Oz's inner circle doesn't really seem like Light followers to me. They follow Oz, and they believed his story of "The Gods cursed me for failing to stop Salem"- something that doesn't exactly paint them in a good light. The Gods don't seem to matter at all to them, just that they... exist. They also weren't aware of Oz's task, just that Oz wanted to keep things peaceful; not necessarily united, but peaceful. I also wouldn't call Oz's circle a cult either, since imo they really don't fit the bill to me, and it wouldn't make sense if they fit the cult BITE model since it'd hinder more than help, though the group IS dysfunctional.

Also, Oz knows how impossible the task is, knows it's just not possible to appease Light.

I do think he USED to work towards the task, but likely hasn't in a long time. I believe he's trying to keep Salem from the Relics because he believes that a second rebellion would never go well, and Remnant is free enough as is, even if he's essentially still chained via his immortality. Salem sees the Relics as a sort of Sword of Damocles- a constant threat looming over the world. And they are- but I think Ozpin also sees them as tools that could help the world.

Basically I think Oz has come to the conclusion that the world is free enough as is, and that rebelling against the Gods again will end very badly (as it had for Salem), while Salem believes that the world is still in chains. Oz's fears definitely aren't unfounded- after all, the Gods pretty much played with him like a toy by repeatedly reviving and then killing him.

Oz has pretty much completely lost faith in the Gods, if he had much to begin with, and the only reason I believe he followed his task initially was likely due to fear and believing Salem hates him, rather than out of any real devotion.

Oh and, I almost forgot- the tale of the two brothers is widely regarded as a fairytale on Remnant, and the main characters had to be TOLD about them, so it's safe to assume they're not nearly as widely known anymore, and we haven't seen any evidence of anything religious surrounding them yet. So there likely isn't any widespread religion about the Brothers, and if there is a religion, it certainly isn't large. There's definitely no mention of any in-universe backlash of including a supposedly widespread religion in a book of fairytales (and I say this because I've seen people say that it's a widespread religion like Christianity, when there's nothing implying that it currently is. During the time of The Infinite Man? Yeah, but not in the modern day).

Soo, there's my analysis on Oz and if he's still working towards his task and what his thoughts on the Gods are.

[syubub]

How to Comfort Them

Woop woop! A disclaimer: this is for entertainment purposes only and not to be taken as fact! This is my interpretation of the cards!

Hell yeah. How do they receive comfort best when they need it? I took this specifically as them having a shitty day or week or something along those lines

Seokjin

Lol

Let him wallow

You comfort Seokjin by affirming his right to feel his feelings and let him deal with it on his own time

He can be a bit dramatic but its short lived

Why does this feel like a roast?

Its not I promise

Seokjin just needs to feel and let it go. He doesn't hold on the things for long but trying to force him to talk anything out is a big no thanks

I think being alone really comforts him most but if he's close to someone I think he'd be down to be alone together

He feels comfort by people staying by his side. He might be the type to have a really shitty day and just wants to sit on the couch and watch TV and not talk about it

When he does want to talk about it though, its best to give him honest advice even if it brutally honest

Jinnie has no time for bullshit and he doesn't want sugar coated shit. If he wants an opinion he'll ask for it and be very aware of what he's asking for.

Another way to comfort Jin is possibly distraction. Again its not an always answer but fun nonsense can help him shake off the blues for sure!

Maybe give him a blanket and and some jellies

I also think he'd really not like anyone seeing him cry?

I think if you stumbled upon a crying Jin that needs comfort the best thing you could do is ask if he needs anything and let him know that you're there?

Also maybe if this is like sad sad sad and he's crying in the bathroom or something it might be helpful to sit on the other side of the door and talk to him if he wants to? and get him water?

Idk I think jin can be pretty guarded especially like this so this would probably never happen

Its more likely that he'll flop down on his bed or couch and just hang out

Yoongi

Oki yoobi

Hold his fucking hand

I'm kidding (kinda)

For yoongi, I think he's similar to Jin in that he doesn't want to be told that everything is sunshine and rainbows and he also doesn't want to be treated like a child

For yoobi I think that he'd feel comforted by talking about what/why he feels like shit

Its like he wants to know that he isn't alone but he also doesn't like to seek out comfort bc he doesn't think he's worth it

He'd probably feel a lot of comfort laying in a dark room with calming repetitive sounds

Smack a pair of noise canceling headphones on him with nothing playing

I think that a great way to comfort yoongi if he was having a bad day is by softly showing support and letting him know that he's being thought of?

Things like letters and stuff are really good

I also think distracting him from bad habits that he used to comfort himself is a v good idea

You see him nomming down his nails to tiny nubs? Offer him something to hold (or slap his hand if you're feeling sassy)

But really though comfort for yoongi is something he'd want to be subtle and ever-present so he can access it when its needed most and he'd definitely want to seek out on his own.

I was thinking too, like if he had a panic attack or anxiety attack DO NOT TOUCH HIM I feel strongly about this. Let him seek out physical comfort and 1,000% ask if he wants to be touched

He just seems skittish in this way and I think that he'd respond a lot better if he gets to seek physical comfort out on his own

You hear that people that will meet Yoongi?

BUT if yoongi was really really close with his s.o I could see him searching and asking for cuddles. Two kinds. Smol curled up yoongi would want to be curled around (kinda like nigiri) if things are pretty bad and serious or him laying in between his s.os legs with his head on their stomach specifically so he can have his hair played with.

Hoseok

Show up for him

Remind him that he is loved and sweet and perfect

Definitely ignite his passions again

Take him dancing

Watch a movie that reminds him of a good memory

You'll have to kinda sus out what exactly is bothering him though

Maybe buy him something sweet like a teddy bear or dinner or take him somewhere

Just don't let him wallow. He needs time to process and stuff but getting him up and out of his funk is great!

Take him to an arcade or even just out for a long drive

I think hobi is the type to need stimulation in a thoughtful way so you'd have to assess the situation and see what's appropriate

Bc hobi might also just want to chill

I think he'd also be really big on physical comfort

Hugs

Cuddles

Sharing a bed

Massage even

Yes I'm gonna say it

(18+) he'd enjoy a nice frick frack or a boot knocking if you will

Maybe run him a nice bath and wine and dine him tbh

Namjoon

Comfort joonie by letting him know that he doesn't have to know everything or have a solution for it

I think kinda taking over his role of inspiring speech giver would help him bc he has so much wisdom and advice but can also have a blind spot when it comes to himself

Let him not be logical

Let him impulse buy 43 new plants all named after the kind of plant they are

I think a nice bear hug and some wise words will be comforting to him

Also the words "you're doing a great job, you got this" and "It's okay to feel this way. Let yourself feel what you feel"

Home boi wouldn't mind if, say, he had a shitty day and you bought him an orchid and named it Orca

Really though I think a gentle reminder that he is human and some basic grounding would really help.

I think too with a significant other I could 100% see him finding immense comfort in feeling the other persons heartbeat? Like if he was in bad shape and his s.o needed to calm him down they could just grab his hand and put it over their heart? Cute shit.

I think rubbing comforting circles on his back when in the proper situation.

Also forehead-pressing?

Jimin

Chim chim gets comfort by love in every form

By him a gift

Give him words of affirmation

Cuddles

Make him food so he doesn't have to

Just be there for him

Write him letters

Really though. Affection of any kind is often welcomed from him

He'd also feel especially comforted if he didn't have to do anything? Like if you could take away responsibility from him for a little that would be awesome

Jimin is a very love/affection forward guy and I think that he'd really really really enjoy a nice top of the head smooch

Sometimes he'd just want to be hugged while he cries

Or sometimes he needs genuine advice and help working through what bothers him

Jimin is a mixed bag and I think its situational but he'd definitely be down for a good ole hug

Maybe too if you suggest things to him. Maybe advice or maybe ways to cheer him up!

Taehyung

This is also very much how Tae comforts army

Cheer him on

Let him know that you love him and that even if things are shit that you're there for him

He'd respond very well to comforting actions and words

I think he needs to cry and feel and do what he does but he feels most comforted when he's reminded that he means something to someone

Positivity and passion go a long way for comforting him

I think if you can also remind him of something that he's done for you, something positive that he's done in you're life that might help him feel a little better

If you can relate to him without making it about you

I think also recognizing his good qualities when he can't

Definitely put him in the sunshine

Give him a nice bevy and sit him in the sunshine

Playing a card game or a board game? Idk why

take him to get waffles at 2am or something new and out of the ordinary

Mostly though snuggles and hugs do the trick.

He's a very feely human and I think having something solid is helpful

ESPECIALLY for his s.o

if Taes future/current s.o is reading... you probably get held a lot. For a long time. Homie is like a little cephalopod

I think he'd also enjoy a nice comfort nap

Jungkook

Oki oki oki

Love him

But not too much

When he's down he tends to have clouded vision

Its like he can't see infront of him and can't see anything that he's done and he feels like he's never accomplished anything ever

He feels loss of control

That's no good

A good way to help that is to help him find clarity

Help him to see the light at the end of the tunnel

He also probably has nighmares/can't sleep when things get really bad so either something like buying him a new sleepy tea or being there for him when he can't sleep

Help sooth his anxiety

He needs that

I definitely think he gets frustrated with himself easily and if you can help him not take it out on himself or turn it inwards then that's really good

He'd benefit from a movie night and a fort

He'd probably be the type to benefit from a talk about what's bothering him but only sitting side by side so you aren't looking into his eyes

Maybe even like on the swings at a park or something

I just think opening up for him is hard so meeting him where he's comfortable is good

That could be texting back and forth even if you're in the same room or on the swings or over street food

I think he'd like it if he had a weighted blanket

Quiet comfort is good for him so he has something grounding him

Maybe if things are not great take him to a rage room or to go kick boxing.

Some semi productive way to channel his energy

Drive him out of the city to go scream into the æther

Idk but being with him while giving him space is good

I think with a s.o he'd maybe seek physical comfort but idk

Maybe

[jenoismydad]

can you do a nsfw a to z for jeno please?

this was really fun to write! took me a while though

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Once you’re done fucking he’ll treat you like a princess. Helps you clean up and gets you a fresh pair of warm and comfortable clothes. Lets you snuggle up into him and fall asleep in his arms. Whispers gentle apologies in your ear while you doze off. The next day he’ll massage your thighs for you if they hurt too much (but honestly you’re so used to his brutality so they don’t hurt that often)

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Jeno likes your tummy. He likes how smooth and soft the skin is. Never forgets to place a trail of kisses down the skin and suck dark marks into it for him to admire later. Even when you’re not having sex, his hand is always slipping under your shirt to rest on your tummy. For him, he takes pride in his arms. Mostly because you like them. Loves how you tightly grasp onto them while he’s ruthlessly pounding into you.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically)

When it comes cumming, there’s two things that Jeno likes. Firstly, cumming inside of you. Sometimes he gets so lost in the feeling of your walls engulfing his walls that he doesn’t even realise he’s close until its too late. Buries his cum deep inside of you and sits back to watch it drip out of you. Other than that, Jeno likes cumming on your tummy. It’s his favourite part of your body and he likes how its slowly cascades down the expanse of your abdomen. Also likes how filthy you look with his cum all over you.

D = Dirty Secret (A dirty secret of theirs)

Jeno pockets your panties and keeps them as trophies. He keeps them hidden under his own underwear. Whenever you’re away from each other, he’ll pull one out and start reminiscing the sex you had that day. Like he associates each one of your panties with the sex you had the day you wore them. Usually gets him really horny so he ends up jerking off while replaying the sex in his head. You still don’t know where most of your underwear goes, so he makes sure to buy you new laces from time to time.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Whatever experience Jeno has, he’s gained from fucking you. Boy didn’t even know how to make out before he did it with you. As a teenager he’s jerked off to a lot of porn so he’d always try to replicate what he saw in that when you guys would initially fuck. But now he’s just so familiar with your body and how it reacts to him so he knows exactly how he needs to treat you.

F = Favourite Position (What positions you tend to use the most)

Basically anything where he’s doing most of the work. Something where he gets to pound into you without any obstructions. So that means either missionary or doggy. Pretty basic but he knows how to make the most of it. Doesn’t really let you ride him that much because its harder to fuck into you that way and you usually don’t scream when you’re on top.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Jeno is very serious. Sex is not a joke to him and the only sign of amusement he’s ever show is when you’re begging him to fuck you while he’s teasing the life out of you. Finds it cute when you’re being needy but he’d never tell you that. He’s just super commanding during sex and like i’ve said in other posts, he’s not evil, he’s charismatic.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they)

Clean shaven lmao. He just doesn’t like to keep hair down there because he finds it annoying to maintain. Doesn’t mind if his partner has hair though. Just finds it more convenient when he has no hair. Shaves it regularly so that there’s no ‘stubble’ (idk what you’d call it sry)

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Very intimate. Even though he’s drilling into you, he’s doing it to show you how good he wants to make you feel. Eye contact is a very crucial thing to him although sometimes he’ll let you off the hook because he knows its hard to keep your eyes open when he’s fucking you so good. You guys do make love, in the morning mostly because the mood’s all lovey dovey, but he ends up finding it kinda hard to control himself and ends up slamming into you.

J = Jack Off (How often do they tend to masturbate)

Before he met you, every single day. Don’t judge him. He was a horny teenager. But now that he has you, whenever he’s horny he just asks you to either suck him off or let him fuck you, which you always comply because you can’t resist. Only jerks off when there’s no possible way for you both to get together.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Choking, overstimulation and slight visual sensory deprivation. All giving though. In terms of receiving he has a very subtle pain kink. very subtle.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

The bed. Again, this boy hates any sort of obstacle or interruption while he’s having his dirty time so he likes to take it to the bedroom. Even if it starts outside of the bedroom, he’ll always find a way to get there. But for the few instances that he’s too riled up to make it to the bed, he doesn’t mind fucking you senseless right then and there. You guys do it in the kitchen occasionally though, mostly when you’re sure that it's just you two.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

You wearing revealing clothes. Its dumb and immature, he knows. But whenever you’re showing a bit too much skin or your dress rides up, something like that, Jeno can’t seem to hold it in. Also when you both are arguing. Jeno just thinks you look really hot when you’re mad because you get really bitchy, different from your usual self and it riles him up. He can’t help put pin you to the wall and set you straight.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Spanking, exhibitionism, voyeurism, and anything that has to do with inflicting pain on you. Jeno’s is very uncomfortable with people watching him have sex or do anything sexually pleasing to him. That’s why he makes your sex life very private. Also he’s just very scared to hurt you so chocking is farthest he’d go. Nothing beyond that.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Loves fingering you. Prefers it over eating you out because he gets to see your face screw up in pleasure. When he’s eating you out all he can see is the rise and fall of your chest, that why he isn’t so keen on doing it, but he will if you want him to. Isn’t too big on receiving because he’s just so fixed on pleasing you. But he doesn’t mind when you ask to give him head. Just not all the time or only when he can’t fuck you and he’s in the mood.

P = Pace (How fast do they go)

Pretty fast but likes to go more hard than quick. That’s why he likes ‘pounding’ into you. Is very rough with it, almost animalistic. It doesn’t matter if you start out nice and slow with a fluffy mood because he always gets fed up with the lack of pleasure and ends up slamming into you. Whenever he’s fucking you it feels like he’s always trying to chase both your highs but you don’t mind because you enjoy the roughness more than you’ll admit.

Q = Quickie (Do they prefer proper sex over quickies and how often does it happen)

Not that rare actually. Sometimes Jeno will just be in the mood but too lazy to fuck properly so he’ll pull you to the side, pull your pants down and fuck you till he came. Don’t worry, he never lets you hanging. In case you don’t cum before he does, he’ll always finger you till you finish. Of course he prefers proper sex but some days he’s just way too horny to do it all.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Unless you want to try something, Jeno isn’t that outgoing in bed. He knows what you like and don’t like as well as what your limits are and he’d only ever push around the borders.You once told Jeno you wanted him to fuck you in the shower and he did but it never happened again because he hated the way his top priority had to be preventing you from slipping instead of making you cum.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Has a life long supply of stamina and can usually go two rounds without feeling overly sensitive. But he’ll usually only go as long as you can manage to go since he doesn’t think there’s a point in going on with you half dead. Lasts a pretty long time as well. Even if he starts before you he usually cuts after you or with you.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He doesn’t own any toys. I mean, why should he when he has you? Finds toys awkward and just can’t see himself using them. He knows that you own a vibrator though and he knows you use it sometimes but he’d never use it while you both are having sex.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

It depends from time to time. Somedays it’s more than the other. Mostly teases you when you’re the one to initiate the sex. Likes it when you beg for him to touch you and fuck you so he’ll only rile you up till you’re on breaking point before giving in to your pleads. Teases you a lot verbally while he’s fucking you. “Do you want me to go slower. I think you’re really liking it slow. No? Faster? Sorry but you’re gonna have to beg for it.” Things like that.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Raspy grunts and low groans when he’s close otherwise he’s silent. Since he spends most of his time dirty talking, teasing you and getting reactions out of you, he chooses not to be too loud. It’s not that he finds his moans embarrassing or anything. He’ll occasionally let one out while your riding him or giving him head to let you know that you’re doing good. Hot is the only way to describe his moans.

W = Wild Card (something random)

One day you woke up super early cause Jeno’s morning wood was poking your thigh and so you sucked him off and rode him. Ever since then Jeno’s aways wanted to fuck you in your sleep but the problem is that you’re a very light sleeper.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

His dick isn’t be big or thick, but more or so on the long side. Like Jeno’s body isn’t really that bulky, its more slender and sculpted and so his dick would also kinda be the same. Has some nice views running through it though.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

It’s decreased over the years but it’s still pretty up there. Jeno gets horny pretty quick by the most basic things. You guys fuck probably every two to three days or so. Just a lot of sex.

Z = ZZZ (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

You guys don’t always fuck in the night so sex generally doesn’t tire him out as much as it tires you out. (Probably because he’s not the one getting fucked dumb.) But he’ll usually fall asleep after you do, a good 15 to 30 minutes after you’ve fucked.

[potionsclasss]

hiiiii!!! can i get a ship plz?

about me: my name is alexandra; 5’7”; size 2; green eyes; pansy parkinson haircut (short, dark, bangs); i survive on coffee; i love style (ive been into dark/light academia for a few years now); classy i guess???; like very, very slytherin; intj; smart with good grades, but i’m not a goody-goody or a swot or whatever; bisexual asf; kinky asf; kinda toxic lol; i’m a ballerina and a runner; my favorite “hobby” is traveling; i’m super sarcastic and my sense of humor is being an absolute asshole; i get told that i’m intimidating like all the time; super polítical; i have a lot of trust issues bc all of my exes were terrible and my mom is abusive lol; emotionally, i’m v closed off; i’m mentally ill but with a ✨god complex✨and; i’m such a draco girl it’s actually stupid

thanks!!!!

Who your ideal partner is and why

Pansy Parkinson, DEFINITELY. She’s basically the female version of Draco; aggressive, patronizing, toxic, and kinky, in other words, perfect in every way. You two would hit it off in every facet, from the compatible hot dark-haired bisexual vibes to being an opinionated independent Slytherin woman. You would be equally patient with each other's signs of love and mental health, knowing you both have major trust issues.

How you met

Making Fun of Draco in the common room. You were friends for years, taking many of the same classes and running in many of the same circles, and seemed to bond over your love for taunting the blonde until he practically burst. It would be a bleak winter day outside, the icy serenade and coolness bringing out the warmth within. You would be sitting across from Draco, with her pressed comfortably and familiarly into your side, the both of you teasing him over his shamefully lost quittage match, enjoying the rosy blush that flushed his face. When he drifted out of the common room and the two of you were alone, you would have to expend all your energy focusing your eyes on the fire in its iron bed, in order to keep your eyes and mind off the heat radiating through you, from Pansy’s skirt-clad thigh pressed softly against yours.

First Date

Picnic under the whomping willow. Pansy would cast a surrounding spell that allowed the willow to become calm for a few hours, allowing just enough time for the two of you to eat and watch the stars. You would be dressed in plaid fitted pants with a tall white turtleneck, and her in an olive-colored blouse and black trousers. The two of you would hold hands, hers encapsulated in yours while she twisted one of your golden rings around your middle finger. There was a tangible beauty in the quietness of the picnic, and your surroundings elevated the simple subtle moment. The jams and candies were sweet, but not half as sweet as Pansy’s company under the richest blues of the evening sky.

Little things about the two of you:)

-Admiring her green eyes, which were the hue of the new spring growth, bright and soft all at once. There were flecks of strength, of the kind of green that comes only as summer advances.

-Her being so patient and loving with you in every aspect, completely nurturing you.

-Study dates in the library that turn into Pansy’s hand rubbing your thigh.

-Making love to soft angsty bedroom pop.

-Traveling around Europe together, kissing softly under sunset skies, like blossoms upon the clouds as sweet wild clover blooms.

A song that reminds me of your relationship: Go Fuck Yourself by Two Feet

@alexandramalfoy

[teenitinygod]

→_→ can I get some of that nsfw alphabet but for Chuuya. Please and thank you very much my dear fren (ㆁωㆁ)

ofc I love you bby! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nsfw alphabet for Chuuya!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

If he can manage staying awake, he’ll get you a cup of water, help you change the sheets, take a bath with you, but that’s IF he can stay awake.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He likes his hair, he keeps that shit on point. Washes it, styles it, moisturizes it, he’s never had a bad hair day.

On you it's your ass, can you blame him? He’s an ass/thigh man. Doesn’t matter the size, he just likes your ass. Loves how it fits in his hands and the slight red tint that covers the swell of your ass when he slaps it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He loves coming on you, on your face, on your breasts. On your ass when he’s hitting it from behind, most definitely. Will cum down your throat, you on your knees taking every inch of him down your throat, he just can’t help it. It's not long before he’s forcing you to take all of him while he fills the back of your throat. 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He has two. He once masturbated using your underwear, not necessarily proud but not ashamed either. If you ever found out he’d just shrug it off. His deepest darkest dirty secret is that in a drunken stupor, he allowed Dazai to fuck him in his office. He will never, ever, ever, talk about it, so don’t ask.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s pretty experienced, he’s been with a few people sexually before, and he definitely knows what he’s doing.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Chuuya loves doggy style, how your ass bounces with every thrust, how easily he can slap it from that angle and how he can pull you hair. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Not goofy, unless he’s drunk. Drunk sex with Chuuya is cute. His altered state makes him more giggly, it usually ends in playful sex where he cracks jokes and slowly fucks you. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) Chuuya keeps himself groomed. A bit of a ginger patch but it's neatly kept, like I said, never a bad hair day.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Chuuya is balanced, there is a healthy amount of romantic sex, angry sex, goofy sex, and soft sex. When sensual sex happens, its like an overload of emotions, another side of Chuuya comes out that you don’t normally see everyday. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He does masturbate, usually its late at night, when he’s horny or when he’s frustrating. Sometimes in his office if he feels the need to. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Whew child- Ok so Chuuya has a spanking kink, he will spank you till you're crying and as horny as ever. He likes being called daddy, whisper it to him in public and he’s dragging you to a secluded place to fuck your brains out. Will and has choked you, it goes both ways for him. Likes to hair pull, especially when he’s tappin that ass from behind. He adores face fucking, he’s ruthless, pushing his cock deep into your throat until you choke. 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He likes the comfort of your homes, but loves the thrill of doing it in his office. He can and will pull you aside anywhere though.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

The subtle things like you biting your lips, or when your shirt rises a bit when you stretch. His thoughts do betray him, sometimes during meetings or when you both are hanging out, images of lewd acts pop in his head, and his jeans feel a bit tighter. Loves the sight in you in nothing, your naked, raw beauty, really gets him going. 

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He’s not going to use corruption on you. He’s scared of what he might do when in that state. It's a hard no from him.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He prefers receiving but let me tell y’all, this man is an expert with his mouth. He knows the right places to suck and kiss, he’ll have you cumming and squirming within no time.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Chuuya's pace is erratic and fast but it's calculated, he knows the places that make your eyes roll back, so he’s aiming for that. When he’s frustrated or upset, it's rough and relentless, he’s chasing his relief this time. When he’s drunk or making it up to you its slower, but deep and intentional, somehow sex is different and fulfilling when he slows his thrusts to hit lovingly inside of you. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He’s all for quickies, they happen about the same amount as regular sex. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He’s down for anything as long as he’s not using corruption or putting you both in direct danger. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Chuuya can go about 3-4 rounds without needing a break, he could go all night if you push the right buttons.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He owns a few for himself. none for you unless it's handcuffs or something for you. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Chuuya’s a total tease but it doesn’t last long, he caves in because of the desire to fuck you.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He can get pretty loud, especially when he is deep inside you. He’s a moaner and has no shame about it.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

It would take a lot of begging, and when I say a lot, I mean a lot of begging but he wouldn’t be opposed to having a threesome with you and Dazai. Not that he’d ever admit it.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Baby boy is packing. He’s a good 7.5 inches, and often goes commando, just cause.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He has a pretty high sex drive, would be willing to do it 4-5 days out of the week.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

As much as Chuuya wants to stay up and cuddle you, engage in pillow talk, watch you fall asleep. He’s out like a light almost as soon as he pulls out of you. You wear him out and after a long day of working he’s pretty spent.

[heauxplesslydevoted]

Cat & Mouse

Summary: A re-imaging of the restaurant scene in chapter 2.

A/N: OH2 is supplying us with such good content. The fic ideas that have popped into my head are just *chef’s kiss*

Warning: Just a teensy bit naughty

Tags: @ao719 @x-kyne-x @paulfwesley @ramseyandrys @choicesobsessedd @a-i-n-a-a-s-h @sparklinglilac  @cream-ray @perriewinklenerdie @barricades-of-freedom @dr-brianna-casey-valentine @doroshi-desu @aworldoffandoms @thatcatlady0716 @drakewalker04 @canknot @lapisreviewsstuff @akacalliope @senseofduties @badchoicesposts @ethandaddyramsey @the-soot-sprite @chasingrobbie @zodiacsign1 @choices-lurker @miyakokurono @trappedinfandoms

~v~

The restaurant Governor Rivera picked is amazing, Naomi can’t deny it. Everything at Chez Pierre feels luxurious, pleasing her senses. The view is spectacular, the Boston skyline lit up beautifully this time of night, the drinks are great—Naomi has never had such an amazing raspberry margarita before—and the food is unlike anything she’s ever had.

The conversation is flowing freely, as well as the drinks. The governor smiles warmly at her, but the older woman’s gaze is intense. “So Naomi, what does Edenbrook’s bright future look like to you?”

Naomi gulps. She wasn’t expecting to be put on the spot like that. 

But she squares her shoulders and looks the governor head on. “I think it lies in our community.” She glances around the table, making eye contact with her fellow doctors. “That’s why we got into this line of work. To help people. Those same patients go back into the community and help others. That’s how a town like Boston grows and prospers. By taking care of its own.”

The governor smiles at her words. “How touching! I should have you write my re-election ads.”

Naomi chuckles good-naturedly at the compliment. She silently thanks her parents. If it weren’t for them dragging her to various parties, galas, and fundraisers growing up, she’d be completely lost in the presence of such a powerful politician. “You’re too kind, Governor.”

She locks eyes with Naveen across the table with, who winks at her, approving the answer. She winks back, as if they’re two co-conspirators in a scheme.

But she feels Ethan’s knee brush against hers and she freezes, her spine going erect and a chill coursing through her a the simple touch. He pulls his knee away before she can fully revel in his touch again. She turns to look at him, but he doesn’t look back, keeping his eyes fixed straight ahead.

Did she just imagine that? He did touch her, right?

What happened to him wanting to have boundaries? What happened to keeping things strictly professional?

She smirks to herself. Fine. If Ethan wants to play games, she can play them just as well. And win.

She slides away from him slightly so she’s able to move a bit more freely. Out of the corner of her eye she sees Ethan lift his wine glass to his lips. As soon as he takes a sip, Naomi curls her leg around his, sliding her heeled foot along his calf. Ethan chokes at the contact, spitting his Cabernet back into the glass.

Naveen frowns, looking at Ethan with concerned eyes. “Ethan, are you alright?”

Ethan nods furiously, a bit too enthusiastic to seem realistic. “Y-yes. The wine just went down the wrong way.”

“I know it’s delicious, but please don’t hurt yourself,” the governor teases. “Slow down.”

Naomi’s foot doesn’t leave his leg. She continues to lazily run it up and down the back of his leg and Ethan sucks in a large breath to stay calm. “Yes ma’am.”

When everyone resumes their conversation, Ethan shoots Naomi a glare. She gives him a coy smile in return, feigning innocence.

A few courses pass and they’re finally into the thick of their meal, with the server coming out to serve everyone filet mignon and garlic potatoes.

“So Naomi,” Governor Rivera starts, “tell me a bit about yourself.”

“What do you want to know?”

“Let’s start with the basics. Are you a Boston native?”

“No, I’m a transplant. I’m from DC, actually.”

“Interesting. So what made you choose Edenbrook for your residency?”

“It’s one of, if not the best hospital in the country. I wanted to learn from the best and become the best.”

“How’s that gone for you so far?”

“Excellent. I performed an emergency surgery with one of the greatest surgeons of this generation,” Naomi says smiling at Harper. “And I get the privilege of working under Dr. Ramsey, who is absolutely amazing at what he does, and he learned from Dr. Banerji. It’s a literal dream come true. I can’t imagine working at a different hospital with different people.”

“And what about you, Ethan?” Governor Rivera asks. “Where are you from?”

“New York. I went to Columbia for undergrad and medical school, but I’ve been in Boston ever since.”

“How long has that been?”

“11 years now.” He feels Naomi’s hand settle on his knee. A few seconds pass, and she doesn’t move a muscle. Instead of bringing attention to it, Ethan continues talking. “But it feels like forever. Boston is my home, even though I wasn’t born here.”

“It’s amazing to hear just how much Boston means to those who weren’t even born here. I’d love to be able to quote one of you guys on that.”

Naomi’s hand leaves Ethan’s knee and travels north. She starts tracing a nonsensical pattern on his thigh, but again, she doesn’t give anything away. Ethan watches as she just smiles politely at the Governor. “Oh now, you can quote me only if we get something in return.”

The governor laughs. “Naomi, you are an absolute delight! I wish more young people had your wit and charm.”

“It’s a gift not everyone has,” Naomi says. Her hand venters up even higher, her delicate hand gently palming Ethan through his trousers. “But I’m willing to shoulder the burden.”

Ethan coughs loudly, and looks down at his lap. He can feel himself turning beet red due to Naomi’s ministrations.

“Son, are you alright?” Naveen asks. “Do you need some water?”

Ethan shakes his head, and coughs again, trying to disguise a moan.  Jesus Christ, is this woman really going to give him a handjob at the fucking dinner table? “I’m fine.” The words come out gruff and shaky, and Ethan barely believes them himself.

Deciding enough is enough, Ethan grabs Naomi’s hand, rougher than he intended, and she instantly stills. Seconds later, she recovers and switches gears, lacing their fingers together. Now Ethan is 100 percent sure his face is bright red, holding her hand feeling much more intimate than whatever it was they were just doing.

Ever so subtly, Naomi knocks her fork off of her table. “God, I’m so clumsy.” She reaches down to retrieve it, but Ethan beats her to it.

While they’re both crouched down on the floor, pretending to grab the utensil, Ethan takes the opportunity to talk to her. “Whatever game you’re playing, Rookie, you need to stop it.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Dr. Ramsey,” Naomi replies, innocently. She sits back up in her seat, leaving him dumbfounded.

Naomi - 1, Ethan - 0.

So is this the game they’re about to play? Ethan nods silently to himself. Fine. If Naomi wants to play with fire, he is willing to light the match with her.

He sits up, and adjusts the napkin in his lap. Another course is placed in front of them, a charcuterie board covered in cheeses, salamis, and crackers and various spreads. Naomi and Harper marvel at all of the options in front of them.

Ethan decides that it’s the perfect opportunity to exact his revenge. He glances down and zeroes in on the high slit of Naomi’s forest green dress. Jackpot. While she’s talking to Harper about some sort of jam that’s on the board, Ethan slowly slides one of his fingers up and down her leg. The contact catches her by surprise, her breath hitching slightly, but she doesn’t do anything else, nothing to alert the other guests at the table to what they’re doing.

His hand goes further, curling over until it’s fully squeezing her thigh. Naomi doesn’t move a muscle, happily chatting with Harper as if nothing is going on. Ethan is impressed. He didn’t expect her to have such a strong poker face. So he ups the ante. His nails dig into the soft flesh of her inner thigh, scraping along the skin. He can feel the goosebumps popping up on the disturbed skin, and Naomi squirms a bit in her seat, but again, he’s the only one who notices.

He frowns slightly to himself. She’s good. Too good. And his competitive streak has been triggered now, Ethan won’t be able to rest until she breaks. 

Ethan’s hand travels higher until he reaches the thin lace of her underwear. He absentmindedly toys with the fabric for a while before pushing it aside. He watches as Naomi rocks herself side to side, her elbows pressed on top of the table. But Ethan doesn’t take it any further, rather he de-escalates the situation, placing his hand back on her knee. His thumb runs across the skin in a soothing manner.

This was only supposed to be about her, but Ethan realizes just how much he’s missed touching the younger woman. As quickly as the thought crossed his mind does he push it away. This was supposed to be about torturing Naomi. She’s supposed to be the loser, not him.

Naomi rests her cheek on her open palm and leans forward, pretending to be interested in whatever story the governor is telling them. A few well placed nods and polite chuckles buy her time, but all Naomi can think about is Ethan’s hand. His big, strong hand that is currently touching her. When she kicked this thing up, she wasn’t expecting him to actually play along.

She needs to get away from him, and the table. There’s only so much more “subtle” writhing she can do in her seat before she starts looking like a crazy person.

So Naomi clears her throat, getting everyone’s attention. Grabbing her small clutch, she stands up. “If you’ll all excuse me for a second.”

They lock eyes and Ethan watches her form retreat from their table and head towards the back of the restaurant where the restrooms are.

He silently gloats. Ethan – 1, Naomi – 1.

A minute later, his phone dings in his pocket. He discretely pulls it out and checks his notifications. He has a new text message from Naomi, with just a single word.

Dr. Naomi Valentine: Bathroom. 

All of the blood rushes from his head upon reading the message. She seriously wants to do this, now? While they’re at a dinner being hosted by the governor? Ethan waits a few more seconds before getting out of his seat as well. “I apologize, but I have to make a phone call.”

“Is everything okay?” The governor asks.

“My neighbor is watching my dog,” Ethan lies casually. “He keeps sending me texts, so I should definitely call and check in.”

“Of course, of course. Go right ahead.”

Ethan smiles, grateful that the lie worked. “Thank you.” He excuses himself from the table, and when no one is looking, he weaves through the tables of the restaurant, making his way towards the back.

He looks around to make sure no one is paying attention to him. They’re not, everyone so caught up in their own dinners and conversations. He slips into the bathroom, unnoticed and locks the door behind him.

The bathroom is cozy, dimly lit and smells like ocean salt and fresh flowers. At the sound of the lock clicking into place, Naomi looks up and locks eyes with Ethan in the bathroom mirror. She doesn’t move in inch, challenging him to make the first move.

“Naomi Valentine, you are an absolute temptress.” Ethan says, slowly moving closer to the younger woman.

“You don’t expect me to believe that little knee touch earlier was innocent, do you?” Naomi shoots back. “You started it, Ramsey. I merely kicked things up a notch.”

Ethan keeps moving closer to her until he’s crowding her space, trapping her between the counter and his body. He buries his face in the crook of her neck, inhaling the jasmine scent of her perfume before placing a delicate kiss on the spot.

“You’ve spent most of the night teasing me,” Ethan murmurs. “Now that I have you all to myself, I don’t know if I want to tease you senseless or absolutely devour you.”

Naomi can’t help but visibly react to that, her entire body shuddering. Fuck, was he always so good at dirty talk?

“You can do whatever you want,” Naomi replies breathlessly. She’ll probably regret the desperation once the fog clears, but right now, she doesn’t care.

That’s all he needed to hear. Ethan spins Naomi around and effortlessly lifts her onto the countertop, the bottom of her dress bunching at her waist. Before she can react, he crashes his lips onto hers, kissing her.

It’s unlike the one they shared at Donahue’s the night before. That was tentative and chaste, with Naomi having to do all of the work. But this is different. This is all consuming and it stokes the flames growing in the pit of Naomi’s stomach. Naomi can feel the kiss from the crown of her head to the tips of her toes, electricity coursing through her veins.

Naomi grabs Ethan by the lapels of his green jacket and pulls him closer to deepen the kiss. One of his hands flies to her hair, pulling, getting tangled up in the mass of soft curls. She moans into the kiss. She always was a sucker for a bit of hair pulling.

Ethan takes advantage of the moan, his tongue sliding into her mouth. It curls against hers, fighting for dominance that he knows she won’t give him so easily.

His lips move across her jaw and down her neck, his beard tickling the path he created. Her head falls back, giving him more access and Ethan kisses along the side of her neck, before sinking his teeth in.

“Fuck, Ethan–” the words die on her throat as he drops to his knees in front of her. His fingers hook into the waistband of her black lace thong, and he yanks it down hurriedly, ridding her body of the material. He throws one of her legs over his shoulder and bites the soft skin of her inner thigh.

She isn’t sure where her will power is coming from, but despite everything single cell in her body dying to cry out at the sensation, Naomi manages to keep it together as best as she can.  She grabs a fistful of his hair and holds him there. Ethan pulls back and runs a long swipe of his tongue against the mark, attempting to soothe the bruise. She curses quietly to herself as heat pools in her belly.

Ethan spreads her thighs apart further. A please growl escapes the back of his throat at the sight of her. “Look at how wet you are,” he murmurs. “How wet you get for me.”

She whimpers at his words. God, she just wants him to touch her already.

“What do you want me to do to you, Rookie?” Ethan asks.

“Please…”

He’s amused by her eagerness, her desperation. He huffs, not quite laughing and his warm breath on her thigh makes her squirm. “Please, what? Use your big girl words, Naomi.”

“Just fucking touch me already!” Naomi snaps, her patience nonexistent at this point.

Ethan chuckles. “Good girl.” He drops her leg and pulls himself up. “You want me to fuck you?”

“Yes.”

Ethan takes a step back and coolly appraises Naomi. Her hair is tousled, her eyes hooded, lips swollen. He’s never seen something more beautiful.

“No.”

Naomi’s eyes snap up and she looks at Ethan, confused. What did he just say to her? “What?”

“You heard me. N. O. No.”

“But–”

“You think you can tease me all night and I’d let you get away with it?” His blue eyes sparkle with mischief and Naomi doesn’t know if she wants to yell at him or cry in frustration. “Absolutely not.”

Naomi shakes her head, trying to sober herself up. Is he really saying no to her? He came all the way to the bathroom just to tease her?

She hops off the counter and fixes her dress, ignoring her weak knees and wobbly feet. “Are you fucking kidding me, Ethan?”

“Come on, you know I don’t kid around.” Ethan leans forward and presses one more chaste kiss onto the corner of Naomi’s mouth. He chuckles at the dazed look on her face. “We should head back. I don’t want it to look suspicious that we’ve been gone for so long.”

Ethan doesn’t spare Naomi another glance or give her a chance to respond, turning on his heel and walking out of the restroom.

It takes her a minute to recover from the shock of the situation. After fixing her hair and reapplying her lipstick, Naomi exits the bathroom. But before she returns to the table, she stops a passing waiter and lets them know that it’s Harper’s birthday. Naomi might as well fully commit to the lie and use it as her excuse for being gone for so long.

Naomi walks back to the table, a waiter carrying an ice cream sundae covered cookie trailing her. She sings happy birthday with the rest of the table to a very flustered Harper, and casually slips back into her seat, avoiding eye contact with Ethan.

It isn’t until they’re on the 7th course of their meal does Naomi remember that Ethan never gave her panties back.

Ethan - 2, Naomi - 1

[dontshootmespence]

A Good Business Transaction

Summary: Desperate for money after getting into trouble, Y/N enters into a ‘business transaction’ of sorts with resident Thrombey asshole, Ransom.

Pairing: Ransom x Reader

Word Count: 2,368

Warning: Gambling problems, paying for sex, p in v, blow jobs and gagging, fingering, squirting, name-calling, biting, creampies, canon divergent. I really went all out on this one. See below.

A/N: You can all blame my horny-for-Chris gf @heycasbutt​ for this.

You have money - not Thrombey money - but you have it. While waiting for Meg to finish with the will reading, you step outside the palatial Thrombey mansion to light up a cigarette, hoping it will quiet your nerves. Unfortunately, you probably have to smoke the entire pack in ten minutes and subsequently die to feel like you aren’t on edge anymore, but hey, that’s life. 

With shaky hands, you tap the lighter and watch the flame ignite, hoping that maybe you’ll spontaneously combust and not have to deal with your looming money problems.

“You know that shit’ll kill ya, right?” 

There goes the cigarette taking the edge off. “Eat shit, Drysdale.” Taking a drag, you let the smoke go into the subtle breeze making its way past the mansion. “What happened with the reading?”

“Family business,” he replies as the corner of his lips turns upward. “You can ask Meg. We’re all fucked.” Something on his face doesn’t read like he’s fucked - like he has something up his sleeve.

Meg’s been your best friend for years, despite you being a few years older, so you were hoping that she might be able to help you with your money issue, but if the whole family is fucked, you assume the entirety of Harlan’s money went to his caretaker Marta. “Well, fuck.”

You put out the half-finished cigarette on the side of the house and pull another one from the pack, quickly lighting it up as you try to wipe away a tear. Last thing you want to be doing is crying in front of Ransom Drysdale. Meg is the only reason you’ve ever met him. He’s sexy as hell but all the looks and money in the world can’t stop Ransom from being the world’s biggest asshole. 

“What’s wrong?” He asks, the smallest note of caring entering his voice before he continues with his usual self. “Can’t milk Meg for all the money she’s not getting?”

“Fuck off, Ransom. Meg’s my best friend. I don’t do that kind of shit to people.”

“Everyone does when money’s involved,” he said confidently. “You got money problems?”

“I’m into it with a bookie, alright?”

“How much?”

“Fifty large, and my dad’s basically cut me off because he’s got a new whore he spends all his money on. The child he never wanted from the now dead mother isn’t his priority anymore.”

“What a cocksucker.” Ransom seems genuine for one of the first times in his life. “I can help you out.”

The red ember of the cigarette draws your attention for a moment. You know what he wants. He’s made no secret over the years. “With what money, Drysdale? You just said you’re all fucked.”

“I’ve got my ways.” The glint in his eyes said he was about to fuck his whole family in the ass, including Meg, but you had bookies on your ass and if he was about to come into some money, you needed it. 

You take a step toward him and take another drag. “I don’t what you’re about to do, but you really mean that? You’d keep the bookies from killing me? Because I’m headed six feet under if I don’t pay up by the end of the week.”

“Yea, I’m not completely heartless. My family can eat shit and die, but you-”

“You don’t want me to die when you haven’t had the chance to sleep with me yet.”

“Your words, not mine.”

“When do you expect to come into this money?” Despite Meg being your best friend your need for self-preservation trumps all. You’re about to fuck Meg over and yet you can’t bring yourself to care. 

“Few days. A week tops.”

“How about I give you a hint of what’s to come if you get me out of this?”

A raised eyebrow tells you that you’ve got him on the hook. He could be bullshitting about money, but your gut says he isn’t. “Any good business transaction needs some good faith, right?”

What an asshole. Grabbing him by the coat, you guide him behind the house. With his family losing their minds inside, no one will notice if you indulge Ransom’s dirty mind. You back yourself into the wall and slide down, feeling your hair catch in the roughness of the reddish brick.

“You think about this a lot?” He asks. “You got down on your knees pretty quickly.”

You glare at him through hooded eyes - the ‘eat shit’ implied. As you fumble with his belt, you hear him chuckle. God, you hate him. You pull him free of his boxers and run your tongue along the tip, catching the little drop of pre-cum that sits there. Despite his cocksure attitude, he shivers and slips his hand into your hair. “You gonna suck my cock, little girl?”

“I’m going to gag on your cock, Drysdale. Let you fuck it like it’s my pretty little cunt.”

Groaning, he grasps either side of your head and braces his forearms against the brick wall. “Open.”

You do as he says, sticking your tongue. “Fuck my mouth, Drysdale. And if you come through for me, you’ll get so much more. After I get paid of course.”

“Of course,” he says suredly. 

Reaching out, you grasp his balls with your dominant hand and guide him into your mouth, wrapping your lips around the velvety smooth skin. You moan around him and watch his jaw drop. This is gonna be the best head he’s ever gotten, if only to ensure that he pays up when the time comes. While his family fights somewhere in the distance, you take him over and over again, making a point not to swallow. If Ransom is anything, it’s dirty, nasty and messy.

A trail of spit drops onto your shirt. “Look at me,” he demands. “Stay still. It’s my turn.”

He places a hand behind your head. At first, you think it’s the act of a gentlemen, but then you realize it’s just Ransom ensuring that if he fucks your brains out he won’t actually fuck your brains out against the brick wall. It’ll be hard to get his money if he’s a convicted murderer. Ransom steps closer to the wall and guides his cock into your mouth again, unrelenting when he feels you gag. Your reflex forces him out and you laugh. Against your better judgement you have thought about his cock in your mouth more times than you care to admit. 

Arousal pools between your legs. If it weren’t for the fact that you need money, and the fact that Ransom would 100 percent fuck you senseless and then go back on his promise, you’d be him to fuck you right here, right now. As he thrusts in and out of your mouth, his cock heavy on your tongue, you hollow your cheeks and try to look up at him. You want to watch the cocky bastard lose his damn mind. 

When he sees your unfaltering gaze, he picks up the pace, his cock getting harder and harder with each pass. “I’m going to come down that pretty little throat.”

You swallow him down and grab his ass, anchoring him there as he pulses down your throat. You hate how turned on you are, shaking as you come. His right hand slinks around your neck so he can feel himself in your throat. “Little slut likes getting her throat fucked?”

“I do,” you reply, swallowing the last of his come as you rise to your feet. “Come through for me next week and I’ll give you whatever you want.”

As you walk away, you wipe the remnants of your ‘business transaction’ from your lips, confident that he’ll deliver.

                                                            ----

Meg’s been crying to you all week. Marta had the inheritance for all of a couple of days when she was found to have killed Harlan. She didn’t. You knew it. Something to do with Ransom you’re sure. But with your deadline to your bookies looming, you can’t bring yourself to care. 

As you knock on Ransom’s front door, you glance around, hoping that no one sees you, especially Meg. She knows about your money problems, so if she sees you’re still alive after walking into Ransom’s place she’ll put it together. She’s a smart girl.

“Come in,” he says, swinging the door open unceremoniously. “You got the account you need it routed to?”

“Yea,” you say, handing over the paper.

He says something about routing the money through various accounts so it’s safer, safer for him obviously; he wants to make sure your bookies can’t come after ‘his’ money. “Alright, call your guy and make sure the debt is paid.”

With shaky hands, you dial the number and wait for him to pick up. “Got my payment?”

“Close call, girl. Don’t let it happen again.” The disembodied voice responds. 

“It won’t.” Because you don’t plan on being here much longer than you have to. You’re going to pay your debt to Ransom, because he’s hot so why not, and then you’re planning on stealing what you can from your father and bouncing before he can do anything about it. Shouldn’t be a problem considering he doesn’t pay attention to anyone but his new whore. “Done,” you say, turning toward Ransom. “I appreciate it. I’ll be out of your hair soon. But I am ready to pay my debt if you’re so inclined.”

“You wear the type of lingerie I asked for?”

Unbuttoning your top, you show him a peek of the nude, see-through lace bra you’re wearing. “Panties match, too.”

“Good girl.” There’s a glint in his eyes that makes you weak in the knees. You’ve had plenty of sex in your life, but something about Ransom’s brash demeanor, give no fucks attitude and search for his own pleasure and his alone gets to you in the best way possible. You have no misgivings about your relationship with Ransom. It’s a business transaction. Money for sex. You got your money and you like sex, so why not follow through? “Strip. Leave the lingerie on though. I plan on destroying it.”

His red gaze remains fixed on you as you let the shirt drop to the floor and your jeans pool around your ankles. “Best 50k I’ve ever spent.”

“Bastard.”

“You like it,” he says as he begins to circle you.

Behind you, he pulls off his light blue sweater and throws it who knows where. All you hear is its soft thud on the ground before he spins you around and pushes you back toward the couch. You fall into it and watch him reach for what appears to be condoms. “Don’t,” you say. “I’m on the pill and I was just tested. I want you to come in my tight little cunt.”

“You are a little slut.” Happily, he throws the box to the side and drops to his knees in front of the couch, pulling the lace to the side so he can lap at your arousal. “I’m going to make you squirt. Scream my name. I plan on ruining you for every man that comes after me.” 

His tongue slides up and down your slit a few times before he slips two fingers inside. With his other hand, he rips the panties to shreds and discards the material on the floor next to him. You grab his head and silently beg for more - faster, harder - anything. When you clench your legs around his head, he starts to fuck you with his tongue, his hands clasping your thighs like his life depends on it. 

Pulling away, he leaves you wanting as he rough fucks your pussy with his fingers. “Squirt for me, slut.”

Your orgasm crests in an instant and then you’re doing what you haven’t before, crying out his name as you squirt. He laps it up like a man starved as you shake, his fingers still inside you. “You’ll never find another woman like me either, Hugh. Every woman you fuck until the end of time. You’ll wish she were me.”

He says nothing. You use his real name, knowing it’ll anger him, but he’s speechless. You’re right and he hates that. Pushing his pants down, he kicks them off and spreads your thighs with his roughened palms, bearing all his weight on you. 

With no ceremony whatsoever, he plunges into your wet heat, groaning at the fit. “God, your pussy is perfect.” Each slam of his cock makes you cry out, back arching into the couch, nipples taut against the thin, but confining fabric of your bra. Whether he senses your frustration or just wants to see all of you, you don’t know, and you don’t care, because he pushes the lace above your breasts. 

As he pounds into you, he bends down to take one of your nipples between his teeth. “Fill my pussy up Ransom. I want it.” You wrap your legs around his waist and use your heels to push him into you harder and harder. 

His sweat-slick skin meets yours as he bends down to take your mouth in a searing kiss. It’s filled with lust and hatred and leaves your head spinning as another orgasm threatens to turn you to jelly. 

Each groan and growl says he isn’t far from coming himself. He grasps your inner thighs and scratches at the skin, pulling out all the way before pumping back in. When he comes, you cry out, “Ransom!” You rub your clit and arch up, muscles spasming as his cock twitches inside you, hot thick ropes of come pooling inside you. 

“Fuckin hell,” he breathes. “I’ll be thinking about this pussy for a long time.”

You dip your finger into your pussy and feel his come, bringing it to your mouth for a taste. You make a point of not breaking his gaze. Sure you’re leaving, but you want to make a lasting impression on the asshole. “Take a picture, Ransom, it’ll last longer.”

Reaching into the pocket of his jeans, he finds his phone and replies, “You know what? I think I will. For posterity’s sake.” He smirks.

Blissed out and filled with come, you smile for the camera. “Eat shit, Drysdale.”

[ashestoashesjc]

Bad Witches (0.3)

Some towns sleep more than they’d care to admit. They claim to be the town that never does, but they sleep. They bustle until the wee hours when even the traffic lights must catch shut eye. (This is the leading cause of late night car accidents, in fact). But not in Riverwake. No matter the hour, Riverwake is alive and in motion. At the peak of dawn, the rumble of mechanized street cleaners is something of an alarm: A new day is here. The only challenge is survival. The road is now adequately shiny.

On a day this beautiful, a person would be mad to waste even a second of it inside. This is why when the coven meets at their favorite restaurant, Giorgio's, for cocktails and gossip, they ask for outdoor seating, beneath a veil of dark gray umbrellas.

After the waiter brings around the first tray of flutes, Bev flags him down and whispers in his ear. When he returns, he has a pitcher filled to the brim with a hazy, dim yellow. He places it at the center of the table and walks off to attend to other diners.

Shrugging, Bev says, "Save him some trips."

During a third round of mimosas, Kate off-handedly mentions her father-in-law and his rocky relationship with his son, but that he thinks gifting Dan membership to their familial country club is effective enough as tension relief. Dan's typically too busy to take advantage of it, she says.

"But you still want to," says Bev, drinking from her orange-tinted glass.

"I didn't say that," says Kate.

"You didn't have to," Bev says, swatting at the air, "Does anyone else hear that buzzing? What is that? Do you think a WASP snuck in?" The other witches attempt to stifle their giggles.

Turning bright red, Kate leans back into her seat, clutching at her glass and bringing it closer to her face so as to slightly cloud the next words she mutters, "I can invite guests, by the by."

The witches' ears perk up.

"You know, I don't think I've ever been to a country club," Matt says, "The wealthy have historically neglected basic hand-washing techniques. Seems like a petri dish, but in a higher tax bracket.”

"I'm from the country. And I've been to a club. Does that count?" Haley asks, still nursing her first mimosa.

"What should we wear?" Bev asks.

Kate sets her glass down to refill it from the orange pitcher, "Dress for spring."

So, they do. The next morning, they are all casual shorts and solid-colored polos and white visors. Only, it's a month away from the dead of winter and it's the middle of Massachusetts. Bev, Matt, and Haley stand outside of the given address and, with their miserable shaking, resemble a group of very posh street urchins.

Kate arrives in a cozy-looking fur-lined parka and upon seeing the other witches' bewildered expressions, snuggles affectionately into the mink hood, "Teach you to mock me."

The other witches follow Kate into the almost intimidatingly large, red-bricked building. What are presumably wings stretch nearly a kilometer in each direction.

"One of you couldn't have ch-checked the weather before leaving the house?" Bev admonishes, one shiver away from legally qualifying as an icicle.

"T-throwing a lot of stones in that g-glass igloo, aren't you?" Haley asks.

The combination of central circulated heating and at least two fireplaces (one in the den closest to the club's entrance; one in the more formal of the two dining areas) nearly melts the witches as they linger with Kate at the front desk.

"Okay, we're approved," Kate says, shaking hands with the attendant behind the desk, "Just don't touch anything."

"Damn. There goes my Grand Theft Itinerary," says Bev.

Looking at her sternly, Kate says, "Don't even joke about that. They will absolutely kick us out."

The witches huddle at the end of the entrance hall, dissecting the list of offered activities. Bev is interested in exactly none of them, but does wish to examine their stock of spirits. Matt begins spraying himself with hand sanitizer the moment he notices how many of the items have a "Group Activity" label.

A woman in a calf-length Houndstooth coat walks past the group but stops to gaze at Kate's jacket, fawning over its charm and subtle glamour. She asks if Kate also bought her coat from Nordstrom. She then asks if Kate plans to play in a tennis match later.

Kate happily confirms that, yes, she will be playing. They chat for a little longer and Kate is still smiling when the woman bids her farewell and walks further into the club's interior.

"How are you going to play?" Matt asks, pointing to the tennis poster pinned to the cork bulletin board at the lobby entrance, "It's Doubles and three of us will likely solidify if we venture outside."

"Oh, we're still playing tennis. Do you know how much I had to bribe the babysitter to come on such short notice?" asks Kate, "They have a heated indoor court," she says, taking off her coat to reveal a sensible, pale beige skirt and thin, rust red pullover.

"Oh, they're fancy fancy," says Haley.

Kate finds the sports center in the left wing, guided by the rambunctious sound of middle aged aerobics. It is a vast gymnasium filled with varied exercise equipment and a bounty of helpful regimens: elliptical trainers, stair masters, Homeless Person Avoidance Training, medicine balls, etc. There's even a rock climbing wall mounted in the back. There are no cables attached to it for fear that people may actually wish to use it, but it has its scenic benefits. She then sees the tennis court, a green square girded with a chain link fence. She spies the sign-up sheet on a plastic folding table at the entrance and begins scrawling her name.

As she flourishes the Barston-ending 'n' and admires her penmanship, an unexpected voice takes her by surprise.

"You're in the way," says the voice and Kate notices that it belongs to the robust, older gentleman looming behind her. He is accompanied by a smaller, leaner fellow and together they look like a before and after advert for malnutrition.

Kate nearly leaps out of the man's direction when she notices her folly. "Sorry! I wasn't paying attention."

"Never seen you here before," says the shorter, wheat blond man.

"Yes, I'm a new--" begins Kate, holding out her hand in anticipation of a handshake.

"Who's your husband?" interrupts the other man, a gray halo of hair situated on the perimeter of his scalp.

"I'm not sure how--" starts Kate, slowly lowering her hand.

"That's how you got in, right?" he asks as he bends down to add his own name to the roster, "Bring the 'Girls' for a 'Fun Weekend' at the country club and then fuck off to whichever Wellness Spa you crawled out of?"

"That's--" Kate tries to interject.

"We promise not to beat you too badly later, okay?" the blond interrupts as he saunters off, followed shortly by his friend.

She is left standing alone at the front of the sports center, not entirely sure she has correctly interpreted the preceding events. In her mind, she loops through their meeting again and again, wondering what she did wrong. When she does realize that she, in fact, ‘Just Got Dunked On’, grim is not the right word to describe the aura she emanates. It's pretty close, though.

Kate staggers into the common area and, seeing the rest of her coven lying haphazardly across an island of recliners, plops into one of the vacant chairs. Her entire demeanor is a haggard sigh.

Trading concerned looks, the witches aren't sure who should handle this. They play "Rock, Paper, Sigils" while Kate slumps further into the padded leather. The agreed upon worst candidate for helping someone through distress is also apparently really bad at games of chance because when she loses, Bev swears under her breath.

Bev very tepidly strokes Kate's back and whispers, "Now, now. Emotions are..." she gulps, "Perfectly normal. I have them all the time." She retches.

Taking Kate's hand, Matt asks, "What happened?"

A full body sigh later and Kate appears to have summoned the drive to retell the tale. By the time she's through, the witches bear the expressions of those personally wronged. How dare anyone make fun of Kate? And not even behind her back like a decent person. WASPS have feelings, too.

"You should've led with that," says Bev, cracking her knuckles, "I'll kill them."

Matt nods, "I don't know about getting someone else's blood on me, but yes, murder seems in order."

Haley can't believe what she just heard. She really can't. She stopped listening halfway through to stare at someone she thought might be her Little League coach. But why would they be here, ten states away in this country club common area? It just doesn't make sen-- Oh, no, that's someone else, nevermind. Oh, god, now everyone's looking at her. Make something up, make something up.

"Like a flock of crows in V-formation," says Haley. Nailed it.

"You guys... you have no idea how much this means to me," says Kate, a welling in her eyes, "I know with you by my side, Bev, we can--"

"Oh, yeah, no, I don't want to play," Bev corrects.

Clearly disappointed, Kate's face sobers a little, but she looks to Matt with hope.

"Sorry, me either. I didn't mean to mislead you," says Matt, sincerely apologetic.

Kate feels as though the dinghy she just acquired footing in has capsized beneath her.

Haley smiles.

Kate looks to her nervously, but the smile only widens. "Have... you ever actually played tennis?" Kate asks.

"Sure, I played a little at home," Haley says. Kate sighs.

"Of course, we had wooden rackets and the strings were made from goat guts, but how different could it be?" Haley asks. Kate sighs again and internally resigns to her fate, but still intends on having a very fun, very non-competitive time.

On the court, shortly before their starting match, Haley tests the weight of the carbon fiber racket. She tosses it from hand to hand and gives a few practice swats. Once, she sends the racket flying, leaving her to run to the middle of the court and retrieve it.

Their first few matches - one with a couple from Denver and the other with the woman they encountered in the lobby and her "chiropractor" who is definitely only half her age because it helps to be young and limber in his profession. Definitely - are nothing to write home about. Haley's home, in particular, is where you should not be writing to. Because they would not be very impressed with her performance. But after getting used to how light this inferior plastic racket is, the aerodynamics of its slender frame, the whistle of its whip through the air, she feels a touch more comfortable.

This comfort is promptly squished like a windshield mosquito when their next opponents enter the fence. Kate's heart falls when she recognizes the sheen of one man's head and the smarm on the other's lips, but her face is unflinching steel.

"Didn't think you'd still be here," the blond says, his eyes a sneer.

The walking comb over assumes his place across the court and, beginning to stretch, says, "They wanted to lose to real men. I don't blame 'em."

Haley exhales. The match begins.

For the first set, the court is a frenzy of movement. Rhythmic thwacking echoes across the gymnasium. The squeaking of sneakers, the breathy grunts upon each impact, the flicked beads of sweat as they dart to strike the racket. All four are giving it their all.

But Kate and Haley are just too accurate. Too fast. Too relentless in their fury.

Nearing the end of their third set, Kate and Haley have dominated the game, easily leading over their opponents' hefty score of one. What was only meant to be a playful diversion sees the girls one favoring play away from taking the whole kit 'n' caboodle. Reigning victorious. But, like, in a fun, non-competitive way.

This is what it all comes down to.

"They would be good at this," huffs the gray-haired man to his partner, "Chicks and tennis." He serves the ball, and Haley, in her distraction, swings and misses. A green blur zips by her head.

The gray-haired man chuckles, "I think that's our point."

"One of them even looks like Serena," his blond partner wheezes hoarsely. They burst into ill-concealed snickers.

"One more round?" Kate asks, bouncing a tennis ball.

"One more round," Haley concurs.

They trade the tennis ball back and forth with their opponents, the net flapping with every pass. For a few tosses, they are very light swings, measured and contained. But in one of her connections with the ball, Kate applies a considerable amount more force to the racket. The tennis ball responds with equal vigor, shooting from her racket's wired face and careening toward the other side of the court.

But it never hits either of the men's rackets. Or makes contact with the ground. It simply floats and whirls at a standstill just past the net.

No one moves a muscle.

The silent stillness of the moment is broken when the blond man appears to muster the confidence to approach the green rotation. He seems to have descended from glaciers with the time it takes him to close the gap. Mere inches away, he stares up at the tennis ball in the exact way that you're not supposed to stare at the sun.

He lifts his hand and reaches slowly upward with an extended finger.

The ball, still in a rapid spin, yet frozen in mid-air, comes undone and pelts the blond directly between the eyes. He goes to the ground and rolls onto his back, his scream slightly muffled by the hands now covering his face.

Exclaiming his name, the gray-haired man runs over to kneel and assist his partner.

Focused on tending to his friend, he is blissfully unaware when, under Haley's intense stare, his shoestrings loosen and then intertwine, lacing together.

"I think that's our point," says Haley.

The man clambers to a stand and starts off toward her with a warning, huffy "Why, you little..." before tripping and spilling to the ground like a freshly slingshotted Goliath.

The blond, a red burn at the center of his face, goes to help him, but his shorts sink quickly to his feet and he falls in a tangle to the green mat.

"That's set," says Kate.

"And match," says Haley.

They grasp hands in a high five and make their way to the fenced door.

As they exit the court, Haley shouts back to the groaning men, "And I would love to look like Serena! She's a goddamn Amazon!" Even after they've exited, Haley can still be heard shouting, "An Amazon!"

They've made it halfway into the main house when they run into Matt just outside of the kitchen, wearing a black apron, stamped with the country club's logo.

"Why are you--?" Haley begins before Matt raises a hand and cuts her off with a sharp breath.

"I went to the restaurant to sample their Chateaubriand," he says, pulling the apron strings over his head, "But someone mistook me for a waiter and one thing led to another, and I report for duty at 9 am."

Slinking down the hall to join them, Bev says, "That's really going to confuse your students."

"Where have you been?" Kate asks.

"That's what I wanted to talk to you guys about," she says.

Occasionally looking over her shoulder to ensure she's not being followed by any of the club's staff, Bev leads the coven to the rear section of the expansive building. Despite the recently watered ficuses, it doesn't appear as though this area of the club receives much visitation.

Taking another cursory look, Bev waves the witches into a room and closes the door behind her. Once she flicks the light on, an old ballroom comes into focus. The dusty, white grand piano, tucked in the room's corner, has uneven keys. The floor is cedar coated in a thoroughly scuffed varnish.

At the center of the room is a freshly painted and ornamented circle, surrounded in thick, off-white candles.

"You've been busy," Kate says.

"Since we got here, I've sensed a mass of souls, trapped just beneath the floorboards," says Bev.

"I felt it, too," says Matt, "I suspected it was just the unease that comes with being in a country club."

"There's that, too," Bev says.

Bev stomps on the floor and a chorus of weak groans ekes up, "That's at least 30? Maybe 40 unhappy ghosts." She locks eyes with Kate, hesitates for a moment, and says, "We have to do something." 

Kate, all out of sighs for the day, brings her hands together and lets them go with a deep breath. "Okay," she says, "What do we do?"

There's no boom box available to blast "Wannabe" while they work, so their preparation lacks a distinct Spice, but they each have their jobs and they each complete them with an expected diminished enthusiasm.

Once Kate's finished lighting the candles, Haley flips the light switch and they take their positions.

Because it was her idea, Bev heads the ritual, and thus initiates the throaty, guttural chanting. As she nears the end, like a musical round, another witch starts from the beginning. And the cycle continues until, thrumming like a locust swarm, the coven is in overlapping cacophony.

As their chanting increases in volume and an impossible wind whips their hair to and fro, the candle flames grow into angry blazes. And in an instant, they extinguish.

And the room goes dark.

Then, suddenly, light returns as a host of faint, blue-white specters encircle the witches. As a few seconds pass and they regain more human forms, a great variety of age among them, the "Leader" of the group, a weathered man in an eagle feather-adorned headdress, nods to the coven. One by one, their forms dissipate. Soon, they've all faded, leaving one little girl, clutching a small toy bunny. She waves at the witches and too disappears.

The candles flicker back to life.

"So good of you to release them," Kate says, laying her hand on Bev's shoulder, "The afterlife will be kind to them."

"Right. Release," Bev says, tapping Kate's hand.

From outside of the ballroom there comes a scream. Looking a smirking Bev in the eyes, Kate pulls her hand away and makes for the door.

The chaos encapsulating the country club can be heard in its full intensity the moment Kate cracks the door open.

It's difficult to decipher exactly what is transpiring: a typhoon of well-clothed, well-fed patrons bounds in every direction. They wail and beg and stumble over each other, flown after by a roaring cavalcade of translucent figures.

The witches watch as the little girl who thanked them earlier flies through the bottom of a couple's table and into their roasted duck, chasing them with scornful, flailing drumettes as they scream for mercy.

Kate's face gets in the way of her palm.

"You know, I saw a hand sanitizer dispenser in the bathroom," says Matt, "Maybe this place isn't so bad after all."

[imagine-myhero]

hello, love! could i please request smth like katsuki having a crush on the reader and basically the whole class knows except for the (v oblivious) reader and one day they just come up to katsukis desk and are like 'i know your secret, bakugo!!! you have an all might fanpage!!!!' and then idk. haha i just find the idea really cute. if you dont want to do it its fine too~ thank u~

Author’s Note: I hope you like this! Thanks for being my first Tumblr request <3 

Pairing: Bakugo Katsuki x Reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Humiliating.

That’s all Bakugo can think as every single one of his classmates’ heads turn to look at him knowingly, some with teasing smiles, when you walk into the classroom that morning. 

Fucking humiliating. 

He grits his teeth and tried to hold back from exploding on everyone because that’ll just make it worse. And way more obvious, too. 

“Hey Katsuki.” You greet cheerfully, setting your bag down and sitting in the desk behind him. Bakugo just grunts in acknowledgement, keeping his attention and deadliest of glares on Kaminari, who had begun making kissy faces at him with Ashido snickering from beside him. 

“Katsukiiii, don’t just grunt at me like that. Say hi~!” You scold him playfully, poking the back of his shoulder. The soft whine of his name makes Katsuki’s ears hot and hands sweaty. His reaction only beckons louder snickers from the god damn loser’s corner over there that— fuck, the laughter has spread all over the classroom now. Great.

You don’t seem to notice and only smile sweetly at him, patiently awaiting a proper greeting. 

How he came to develop feelings for someone as jovial and sugary sweet as you is a complete mystery to him, and infuriating too. The class has a pretty much limitless arsenal of jokes against Bakugo thanks to your flirtatious and playful displays of affection that prompt strange responses from him. 

The worst part? You don’t even mean to come across as flirty. Being cute as fuck is just sort of who you are. Bakugo is all but certain you’re just being nice, and wouldn’t date a raging hothead like him if he were the last person on earth. That’s why he’s trying to hold himself back around you, so you don’t get put off even more by his total lack of empathy. 

“Kacchan? You okay?” You ask him when he doesn’t answer, using that damned nickname you learned from that damned Deku, and he’s unfortunate enough to catch a glance at the worried pout on your pretty lips.

He looks away quickly, only to see Kirishima giving him an encouraging smile and nod from his desk with an enthusiastic thumbs up that’s not nearly even a little bit subtle. 

Katsuki sinks into his chair, wanting nothing more than to blow up everyone in this class including himself, and clenches his fists in his pockets. He is totally convinced he can’t hold it in any longer if even just one more extra—.

“Yeah, you okay, lover boy?” Mineta mocks from his desk behind you with a heavily misplaced sense of confidence from the classroom’s atmosphere. 

That’s it. 

With only the loud screeching of his chair to warn anyone, Bakugo is at Mineta’s desk in an instant holding the boy midair by his face. Mineta is thrashing around, sobbing hysterically, and begging profusely for mercy. 

“Hm? ‘Lover boy’?” You repeat with a confused expression, looking up at him. Bakugo’s hand tightens impossibly on the purple-haired boy’s face, making him shriek. Yep, he’s gonna kill this ball-haired bitch. 

“Sit. Down.” Aizawa demands with a glowing red glare as he enters the classroom. Katsuki almost doesn’t listen, but when he hears the unraveling of Aizawa’s capture weapon he relents. He drops the weeping boy on the ground and stalks back to his desk, crossing his arms and glaring out the window. 

He spends the rest of the class daydreaming of ways to beat the shit out of his classmates. In fact, he doesn’t even notice the lunch bell ring and the rest of the class filing out of the room for their break.  

“Psst.” You whisper, poking him in the back with your pencil. Katsuki snaps out of it when he feels the prodding. He sees that the classroom is empty, save for the two of you. He looks back at you and is reminded of the hell that had been his morning, but his fantasies of violence has helped him calm down a bit and he no longer is on the verge of a rampage anymore.

“I was thinking of what Mineta said earlier,” You began.

 Oh no.  Katsuki feels all the rage he felt before rushing back to him, but this time he also felt… a little scared. 

A wide smile spreads across your face as you stand up and walk around his desk to fully face him. Katsuki doesn’t know what to feel because no he definitely was not scared— no goddamn way. Still, he holds his breath when you open your mouth to speak. 

“You have an All Might fanpage, don’t you?!” You declare, pointing your finger at him, “He’s pretty much the only person you look up to, and I saw how passionate you were during the final exams when you were up against him. You totally have one, don’t you? That’s gotta be it.” You explain with a look of proud accomplishment on your face.

Katsuki stares wide-eyed back at you. He thinks he tastes blood in his mouth, probably from the ulcer that just formed in his stomach and ruptured with shock all in the last 60 seconds. Katsuki feels such a rush of emotions: relief, amusement, exasperation, and of course anger. 

“What?! Do I fucking look like Deku or something to you?!” He growls at you, doing everything to hold back from shouting like he usually would, and a part of him wonders why he didn’t just roll with it to avoid what he knew would come next. 

“Huh? Well then... what did he mean?” You ask curiously, tilting your head. Katsuki grits his teeth. This is torture, he decides. Fuck holding back. Fuck this suffering in silence bullshit. Fuck the whole class giving him shit for secretly liking you. He is the best, damn it. He’s gonna be the number one hero in the world someday, he can ask a damn person out!

“Go out with me.” Katsuki demands, standing up from his chair because he felt way too closed in under your kind and gentle gaze. Well, so much for the asking part. 

“Huh? But...it’s raining outside.” You respond, looking reluctantly out the window where a light drizzle had begun to fall. Katsuki isn’t sure if you’re trying to let him down nicely or you’re just that fucking dumb. 

“On a date, idiot.” He snaps. Not a great way to word it, but seriously, only someone who has absolutely zero interest would be this damn oblivious anyway. At this point, he’s just doing this to get it over with and get the rest of the class off his back once they see you avoiding the shit out of him after this for at least the rest of the year. His mangled ego will take the hit if it means this will finally be over. 

Love or whatever it is fucking sucks. 

“I’d love to…” You answer uncharacteristically quietly. Katsuki almost doesn’t hear you, but the furious blush on your face confirms it. 

You would?

Katsuki stares at you for a moment, before breaking out into a wide smirk. 

Of course you would. He’s damn amazing. The best actually. And the best only deserves the best. He should have done this sooner. 

Wait, why are you looking at him like that? Shit, what is he supposed to do now? Fuck, what’s a good date idea? A sparring match? No, idiot. The gym? No! Shit. 

“The weather is supposed to be nice this weekend. Want to go for a hike?” You suggest, stammering a little at first and still blushing. Katsuki stares at you in surprise. He didn’t expect that idea from you. He loves it. Climbing real mountains is sure as hell a lot better than the figurative one he’s been climbing all this time. Especially if it’s with you. 

“Yeah. Yeah, that sounds… good.” He agrees lamely. 

“Great!” You say excitedly, plopping into the desk in front of him and pulling out your cellphone and a notebook. “I’ll look up some hiking trails! I’ll pack snacks and you can bring the water. Is it okay if I bring my dog? Oh, maybe we should…”

Katsuki listens to you ramble, amused and relieved that you’re back to your normal, bubbly self and glad that the awkward exchanges are finally over. He sits back down in his desk and listens to you talk his ear off, adding his input here and there, and lunch completely forgotten by the both of you.

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas: Power Transfer

Also on AO3!

TL;DR: 

One for all is a power that has been passed down for generations. Turns out the most recent generation can afford to be a whole lot more liberal with his sharing. Also turns out sharing quirks runs in the family.

An AU where Izuku can share OFA full cowling with multiple people at once.

shared power ofa,

izuku giving aizawa 5% of one for all durring the usj or izuku giving toshinori 99% of OFA durring the last fight

cause consider the world never finding out about small might, all might retires but izuku knows

the rescue team all having the max amount of ofa they can use, which is around 2% each, cause a lil sparking team of heroes

izuku using kirishima to give bakugo some too n them using it to get away

izuku having two quirks is my favourite goddamn thing bc him being able to share his quirk but not having anything to share is great

he gives bits to allmight, like a constant 1% so he can teach classes and do press stuff

some rando wants to do an "all might" where is he now segment and it spans a good few months so izuku is continuously in the background just

conspiracy theory starts that izuku is a villain or allmights son

a villain and all might's son

izuku has no double toe joint but the doc cant find any evidence of a quirk? so he tells them izuku is either quirkless or has an invisible quirk. something subtle, or specific enough to have not activated by now

bakugo kinda,, is chill with izuku. he was waiting for izuku to develop a quirk till he judged him, but he never did so he kinda withheld judgement long enough for them to become decent friends

anyway, izuku likes to ramble about different things his quirk could technically be, bakugo likes to join in. they can go at this for h o u r s cackling about stupid hypotheticals

they workout together, they both do boxing and try out random moves they see on the internet on each other. they have a pile of gym mats in the woods like the weirdos they are

bakugo is like,, convinced izuku's quirk is actually an intellect up but he just shrugs

izuku has to grab something before he heads home so he takes the underpass and we get basically episode 1 from there. all might says no, the villain gets away, attacks Bakugo. izuku runs in, throws dust in the villain's eyes and pulls at bakugo's hands. all might jumps in, saves the day yada yada

some background for u about all might bc his past is a touch different here. during the battle with afo, afo was distracted. all might sustained the same injures but won more easily.

night eye never looks into his future because "my purpose is done, nighteye. let's live like everyone else, no fate of the world on our shoulders" he never looks into all mights future again at his request

they stay together

so instead of the big argument they go get ramen and get drunk because they don't have to be superhuman anymore, they can relax now

back to the main timeline-

so izuku is already fit, cleans the beach in 8 months, nighteye supervises

all might gives izuku the quirk 2 months before the entrance exam, nighteye is there to "oversee" (he wants to see izuku choke on a hair and laugh at this kid hes become pretty fond of)

also mirio! is izuku's bro because i love he

izuku eats the hair and gets the quirk like, instantly which?? is confusing nighteye and all might. nighteye has like,,, hidden behind a car because hes the only person with self-preservation

allmight touches izuku and the lightning climbs up his arm and he just pOofs out into swolmight. hes ShooK, so is izuku

anyway, he manages to turn it off and izuku is just standing there like "oh my god what the fuck"

"izuku,, what,, happened there"

",,,, one for all??? leaked out??? into allmight????"

...

"nighteye come over here."

"izukU nO"

"STAND STILL NIGHTEYE I JUST NEED TO TRY SOMETHING"

nighteye is forcibly given a little of ofa and regrets a lot of stuff

anyway, izuku breaks an arm trying to use ofa and hes muttering trying to work out how to use it, nighteye basically says "well, think back to how ofa came about" and izuku is like ",,, what"

and nighteye screams because TOSHI YOU DIDNT TELL HIM?????? and allmight ",,, o o p s"

so izuku gets to hear the story of all for one while hes being driven to UA for recovery girl hes,,, really quiet for a second

"when did you fight him?"

"six years ago, april?"

",,, this has to be a coincidence"

hisashi went out on a "business trip" 6 years ago and they haven't seen him since. he calls, but hes never visited and izuku has this terrible feeling

because izuku cant calm down and because nighteye thinks this kid might be on to something they call tsukauchi and he agrees to meet them at UA

izuku gets treated, naomasa is in v quickly afterwards before he calls his dad he turns to nighteye, allmight and Naomasa

"i've never been able to lie to my dad. i thought he was just really good at reading me but,,"

"if hes afo he might have a quirk"

"yeah. so i'll just twist the truth. im good at that, but thats all i'll be able to do"

anyway, he calls up his dad and slaps this big grin on his face. the phone is on speaker

"hey dad!!!!" "izuku! is something wrong?"

"oi, cant i call my dad for no reason?"

"you, willingly calling someone? dont make me laugh"

izuku giggles despite himself

"anyway, you'll never guess!!"

"did youuuu,,,, hmmmm, meet all might?"

they freeze but izuku just laughs

"yeah,, but thats not the most exciting thing!!! my quirk came in finally"

"oh?"

"yeah! imagine the worlds most basic power enhancer, but i can share the energy! you have any idea where that could have come from?"

"no! i can't think of anyone in our family with a quirk like that! sounds crazy!"

naomasa looks grin, and mouths "liar"

izuku pales but keeps his smile

"do you think you could visit, id love to show you!! oh, maybe we could test it together! you always had the best ideas for my quirk notes"

"id love to izuku, but im stuck in america for the near future, you know it is. i'll see what i can do tho, ok champ?"

naomasa shakes his head again "lying" izuku looks like hes going to be sick. nighteye is pale, all might looks stunned. izuku grits his teeth but his voice is still light and happy

"i'm gonna make it into UA so you can watch me kick butt from america! you better cheer me on!"

"im looking forward to it. say hi to your mother from me."

naomasa nods. hes telling the truth. that makes nighteye feel the sickest

"love you izuku"

",,, love you too dad"

izuku hangs up the phone and retches into the bin. nighteye is shaking. all might storms out. naomasa punches the wall

izuku looks up with tears in his eyes

",,, does my mum know?"

nighteye wants to cry

"i dont know kid"

izuku tells katuski that his quirk finally came in! but,,, in the worlds biggest mess of a way

basically hes lying in bed, trying to work out why he can't use it without breaking bones but the people he shares it with can, he bolts upright

"POWER MODULATION OH MY GOD"

he runs out his door all the way to bakugos house and climbs in through his window, grabbing a sleeping bakugo by the shoulders

"KACCHAN ITS POWER MODULATION"

"IZuKU whAt tHE fuCK"

"my quirk!!! i was breaking bones because i wasnt modulating it!!!"

",,,,q QUiRK/???/?"

",,,, oh yeah oops"

mitsuki runs in with a frying pan ready to murder a villain but its just izuku

"carry on"

izuku doesnt tell him its ofa but he explains his quirk has finally showed up, bakugo asks him if hes registered it yet

",,,noooooo"

"wait what? you, breaking the law? mister "i cant kill an ant because all might himself will call me a villain""

izuku, w the most shit-eating grin, explains that you only legaly have to register your quirk when it shows up, or after you are tested when you are five, whichever happens first so, legally, he doesnt need to register because it would be seen as voluntary updating

cut to the enterance exam

aizawa is holding the papers for the kids hes observing right then

"quirkless? that kid doesn't look quirkless"

and yagi sighs

"of course he didnt,,,"

"all might? do you know him?"

"NO NO IDEA WHO MID- THAT YOUNG CHILD IS"

",,,, r i g h t"

“aizawa listen i have never seen young midoriya in my life ever”

basically, izuku is hiding the "transfer" part of his power from most people bc hes stubborn and thinks it could be useful

also,,, in this au shinso makes it in on hero points thanks

bakugo is about to rush the 0 pointer but shinso can see its going to fall on him shinsou yells

"HEY FUCK FACE"

"HA-"

"MOVE MOVE MOVE GET OVER HERE BEFORE YOU FUCKING DIE OH MY GOD MOVE I DONT WANT TO SEE SOMEONE DIE TODAY"

shinsou and bakugou are the type of friends that flat out have no love for each other but would punch anyone who says anything bad abt the other. like shinsou walks into school and bakugou s just

“dammit i thought u fucking died smh”

“i wish i did then i wouldn’t have to look at ur ugly ass”

in this au shinso and izuku bond when they are standing outside they door bc izuku looks like hes gonna fucking cry hes so scared and shinsou is like "wow big mood"

shinso is not shinson in this au! bc izuku is gonna do a soft

basically, quirk test? shinsou is s w e a t i n g bakugo looks a little worried for his new friend but no one would notice if they weren’t izuku

shinsou turns to him like "my quirk is mental im going to fa I L"

izuku grabs his hand and he feels this rush of energy, you can almost see it dancing along his skin. izuku grins

"i think you'll find you do just fine"

(izuku gave him like,, less than a full 1% but hes like doubled in strength and speed and hes??? shook?? bc whats happening)

aizawa is lost bc shinso has a mental quirk he shouldnt be doing this well, so he tries to cancel it

nothing happens and aizawa is so lost??? bc shinsou is kinda reedy and not super fit but hes placing solidly in the middle

and he noticing that shinso’s eyes seem to be glowing and so are they eyes of the kid coming in second and gives a big "hm,mmmm"

anyway, ball pitch, he cancels izukus quirk and turns to look at shinso, his eyes are dim. izuku looks sheepish but also like hes ready to throw down and its an interesting look

aizawa just sighs "you know what? just throw the ball."

izuku g r i n s and yeets it into next year using more of his quirk than he like,, really should have? to prove a point (his finger is bruised, not broken. he used 25%)

anyway aizawa shows the results, shinso is in the middle, izuku second, hagakure is last and sadly shes not getting expelled bc plot reasons – im sorry I have a thing against her shes perfectly valid probably im just still convinced shes the traitor even tho its totally a teacher

he calls izuku out on it but does admit he didnt say you couldnt help eachother, so its kind on him. shinso looks like hes going to pass out with relief

Hagekure is the traitor in this au though, 100%

during the camp she is at the pick up zone, hiding. izuku pulls bakugo out of the way, they all seem safe

but

she pushes izuku in through the portal as it closes

fyi afo takes her quirk and leaves her braindead in the nomu factory bc shes not useful anymore. also because now he needs to have a really awkward conversation with his son he was hoping to avoid

also usj? is really melodramatic

he gives aizawa 4% which is the max nighteye could hold without it hurting

aizawa takes a hit from the nomu and he reaches out his hand

izuku cries as he gives him an extra 4% and aizawa gets free but he can see bruises forming with every step his teacher takes

[inspector-montoya-fox]

let’s talk about the themes of the Sly games

Sly Cooper and the Thievius Raccoonus (2002):

Paris: this might not be the game’s main theme but it’s the theme that is most omnipresent. Paris is the glue that connects everything together. it immediately has such an impact on the player, even though it’s just the tutorial and the gang’s base of operations. Sly being a thief but also living in Paris just sounds so right, like it’s the way it should be. it fits. 

The Thievius Raccoonus: this is the main theme and what provides the game with its premise. it’s the book that needs to be glued back together and its importance is highlighted throughout. almost every level has a page included so we’re constantly reminded of its significance. the skills we earn by retrieving the main ancestors’ pages elevate the gameplay and force the player to respect it. other than that it’s a clever way to spotlight the ancestors and establish that Sly does come from a long line of thieves.

Family: this doesn’t need much explaining but i’ll do it anyway. we start off with Sly’s parents getting killed and him landing at an orphanage where he creates a new family for himself with Bentley and Murray. you’ve got 3 different types of family: (A) Connor and Sly’s mom getting murdered and Sly’s aim to avenge them, (B) Bentley and Murray being true brothers when Sly was left with no one (i’m tearing up), and (C) the ancestors, which are explored more in-depth through the theme of The Thievius Raccoonus. Family as a theme explores Sly’s motivations and drive, even though Connor’s role is minor, especially in comparison to his role in Sly 3

Morality: Sly 1 is rudimental in its gameplay. it was a little game with a big promise at the time it was released, hoping to serve Sony and the Playstation 2 with a worthy mascot and an even worthier title. but right off the bat the player is bombarded with a shit-ton of lore about the world Sly lives in and how he operates. we immediately find out he’s an antihero, an honourable thief who has a code of conduct. this comes into stark contrast with the game’s villains who are basically filthy crooks. thief takes down thieves and the theme of Morality is SP’s attempt to make the player distinguish between good criminal and bad criminal. Morality as a theme is spotlighted immensely in Cold Heart of Hate when Sly saves Carmelita because he truly is the good guy, but also when it’s revealed that what’s been keeping Clockwerk alive all these years is the lack of morals and the hatred. the game establishes Morality as the outlining theme of the entire series, placing Sly on a pedestal because he’s honourable. morals trump hatred, so fuck off Clockwerk (even though ‘perfection has no age’ might be one of the coolest lines in the game lol)

Sly 2: Band of Thieves (2004):

Paris: this is the theme from the first game but on steroids. like make it x10. when you take the plot of Sly 2 and boil down to its core, it turns out to be a full-on race against time to save Paris. it provides both a nod to the first game and a sense of closure at the end: the game begins in Paris and ends in Paris. It’s both a setting and a catalyst, and it is absolutely brilliant in the game. you spend most of the game globetrotting, away from home but as soon as you find out ClockLa is on her way to unleash her psychotic brain waves and turn the city evil, you find yourself at the edge of your seat, caring more about Paris than anything else. it’s omnipresent and powerful and i don’t know why but i love it.

Spice: if you wanna be my lover. here’s an amazing replacement for drug trafficking as a plot device in a children’s game: spice. the spice trail is what pushes the narrative forward but also gives the gang something to face before the pieces fall into place and the larger scale of things is revealed. before ClockLa steals the show, spice is the main antagonist in the game. it brings the villains together, leads the gang from one location to another, provides some memorable missions and obstacles (Spice in the Sky and a raged, spice-infused Murray). but it’s not to say that it fades away in the long-run. Spice is actually the subtle thread that connects the episodes together but also is significant to the final master plan of hypnotising Paris.

Deception: obvious one here. Neyla pretending to be an ally is the major example. we’ve got the Contessa pretending to be loyal to Interpol, we’ve got Arpeggio seemingly being the mastermind behind everything (which he kinda was until he wasn’t), we’ve got the whole evil plot reveal on the spice, we’ve got Neyla ripping off Arpeggio on her journey to become the most well-written villain in video-game history. lots going on here. overall great theme. on a wider scale (and i’ve touched on this before in some recent posts) we’ve got SP deceiving the player into thinking the plot is all laid out at Rajan’s ball until it all turns to shit and nothing goes as expected. Appearance V Reality is a sub-theme that pops up when Bentley fights Jean Bison and Bison constantly underestimates Bentley until the turtle fucking blows his lights out. it’s not an instance of Deception per se, but it’s worth mentioning

The Past: Clockwerk’s return makes this a theme instead of a motif. before ‘saving Paris’ becomes the main objective, it’s Sly’s determination to prevent Clockwerk’s revamping that kicks off the game’s events. the events of Sly 1 play a pivotal role here as they lay the groundwork for the plot of Sly 2. it’s not just Sly 2: The Sequel. with its own set of characters and an intricate story it becomes its very own thing. but Clockwerk is the link that connects everything.

Morality: this one sneaks up on you in the game’s second half and just bites you right in the ass when you least expect it. Contessa, who until her boss-fight seems to be just another selfish spider bitch witch, manifests into this advocate for Sly’s inner demons through simple dialogue. fucking brilliant. ‘You’re an ignorant child playing dress-up in his father’s legacy’ (in my opinion, the best line in the entire series) kicks it all off. and then the theme becomes obviously present throughout. it explores the fine line that Sly walks between robin hood and scumbag thief, it shows how the villains are down-right criminals who want to benefit from their crimes, it cracks black and white into a million pieces because in a single game there are like a million layers of good and evil: Barkley at the very top as the authoritarian white, Carmelita as a sympathetic cop who tries to grasp onto her own code of ethics while occasionally running with the thieves, Sly and the gang as antiheroes, the villains as... villains, and Neyla as the embodiment of satan. it’s a scale and the game spotlights this. i had a different bullet point for Justice but i think it falls under Morality. basically, Carmelita’s story arc in Sly 2 deals with blurring her views a bit and re-defining justice

Sly 3: Honour Among Thieves (2005):

Ancestry (Cooper Vault): this is what the game is all about, or at least the premise. after stitching the cottdamn book back together by the end of the first game, Sly 2 doesn’t give any attention to the Thievius Raccoonus. in fact, Sly 2 exists on a completely different plane, using its amazing plot to elevate itself away from the lore of the first game. ancestry is rarely mentioned. flashforward to Sly 3, where SP takes us back to the mythos for a new caper involving a new reveal: the Cooper Vault. what we thought we knew about the ancestors is thrown out the window to pave the way for this mystical place where the Coopers buried their secrets and their loot. i’d like to point out that the theme of Ancestry is great and all but SP does a shitty job in spreading it throughout the game. whilst recruiting the new gang members we often forget why we’re doing so and it’s not until the last episode of the game that we get the fulfilment of the theme’s promise. it’s also worth mentioning that the theme pops up in A Cold Alliance when Tsao is comparing himself to Sly and he speaks of his ancestors but we somehow get the feeling that his ancestors were all colossal jerks like him and had absolutely 0 honour

Family: this is not the same as Ancestry. the new gang members could have very well been distant with each other if not for the adventures that made them bond. Bentley’s fascination with the Guru, Murray being the Guru’s apprentice, Bentley falling for Penelope, Penelope and Panda King helping Murray with the van, Panda King and Sly working alongside each other to kill vampire mantises and the Crusher. these are all moments that helped sell the ‘group of thieves’ aspect of the game. but Family also explores the bond of the original trio and how, even when they face their differences (Bentley and Murray living in the shadow of Sly), they can still make it through, even stronger than before. other references here might include: Panda King and Jing King, Dimitri and the Lousteau diving legacy, Dr. M and McSweeney being Conner’s “sidekicks”

Honour: this replaces the theme of Morality from the previous two games as the situations the characters face allude to honour (doing what’s right for the greater good) rather than morality (black and white, good vs evil). what i mean by that is SP making an effort to distinguish why Sly is a different thief and ultimately an antihero. this was sorta explored in the previous games by having Sly put an end to the villains’ various operations but the overall plot overshadowed those instances. Sly 3 on the other hand fully explores the theme of Honour by including the word in the title and having the gang save the day in every episode. stopping harm to the environment (polluting the Venice canals, destroying the Australian outback), helping Penelope come to terms with her inner demons by encouraging her to drop the facade of the Black Baron, saving Jing King from forced marriage, etc. the theme also ties into the theme of Redemption (below) but what i’d really like to point out is that Carmelita gets in on it as well. i can’t think of a more honourable moment than when she finally, after 3 games, puts the petty cop bullshit aside and comes to Kaine Island with her squad to save Sly from Dr. M. she makes Sly’s battle her own and doesn’t give up, showing up at the very end to save him from Dr. M’s horrific boss-fight (ugh)

Deception: although not as major as in Sly 2, i’ve said this time and time again: Flight of Fancy perfectly encapsulates the theme of Deception. Penelope dressing up as the Black Baron is not the only instance of deception. you’ve got Bentley and Penelope blowing their online avatars out of proportion, you’ve got Dimitri who was initially a villain finally turning sides, you’ve got an episode card full of sunshine and bright blue and gold fonts for a hub that’s all gloomy rainclouds. beyond Flight of Fancy, i can think of a few more instances: some Shakespearian shenanigans when Carmelita disguises herself as Jing King, or when the gang doesn’t reveal their Dead Men Tell No Tales plan to the player and we’re left thinking that Sly is going to get eaten by sharks

Redemption (Choices): speaks for itself, really. this one ties in with Honour and is a sub-theme, maybe a motif. we’ve got Murray’s desire to redeem himself for feeling guilty over Bentley’s accident. we’ve got Dimitri and the Panda King joining the gang after previously being villains in the series, and eventually redeeming themselves through helping with the heist. we’ve got Penelope redeeming herself as the Black Baron by joining the gang. i also named it Choices because these characters chose to redeem themselves. Choices are all over the game, whether its the lack of free will or the sacrifice characters make: Jing King isn’t in a position to choose whether or not she gets married during her capture, Sly sacrifices his cane at the very beginning of the game to save Bentley and then jumps in front of Dr. M’s shot to save Carmelita (!!!)

Closure: or the lack of, smh. SP’s trilogy comes to a close and therefore the theme has to exist even if the game doesn’t provide the player with mass satisfaction. Sly finally gets together with Carmelita, Bentley finally gets over his fear and self-doubt and lives the good life (with Penelope), Murray kicks off his racing career, and we get happy-ever-afters for the rest of the gang as well

[zenosanalytic]

People What Aint From Round Here Is The Problem...

So I just watched Once Upon a Time... In Hollywood and I have THOUGHTS:

Ive read a few reviews&ruminations on this film at this point and I can’t believe that none of them got(or at least, mentioned explicitly) the primary thesis of this movie, spcl given that Tarentino flatly states it out the mouth of his primary protagonist within, like, the first 15-20mins of the film: “...most important thing in this town is when you’re making money you buy a house in town. You don’t rent... Hollywood real estate means you live here. You’re not just visiting, not just passing through. You fuckin live here.” i.e., the most important thing in Hollywood, to Hollywood, is the people FROM Hollywood; Everyone else is just a filthy, trouble-making tourist or profiteer who is “Passing Through” and “Doesnt Get It” and  “Is Fucking It Up”(It being the film industry), and probably “Secretly Hates Movies”. There are places and aspects of this movie that are basically a Nativist Angeleno rant, written by a life-long Angeleno film-nerd-turned-film-maker, against Hollywood’s critics(and his critics which he just totally conflates with the former), and probably non-Angelenos(and non-Californians?) in general.

There are two ways to read this thesis: Straight and Subverted/Satirized.

The evidence for reading it straight is pretty plentiful. Lots of reviews have puzzled at where the line connecting the constant hippie-bashing, the weird focus on knocking Polanski’s Polishness & preference for shooting in London, and the inexplicable pot-shot at Bruce Lee is, and I think this is it. “The Hippies” are repeatedly presented as a corrupting force: digging through trash, living in squalourous filth at the Spahn Ranch dragging members of “Old Hollywood” like its owner into it with them, selling drugs, and using sex to “control” men. And attached to this is presenting “The Hippies” as foreign; not only from another place, but refusing to assimilate with the LA way of life and hostile to it. The Manson family are the only explicitly identified “Hippies” in the film(other than, possibly, the one who sells Cliff an acid cig). The only “positive” portrayals of Bruce Lee in the film are silent ones of him teaching anglos kung fu, which has some fairly obvs and well-understood Implications.

But there’s also good evidence for reading it as subverted and satirized. Both Tate and Dalton are NOT from California, let alone LA, and Booth’s origins are left unclear. Dalton’s the only one of them explicitly id’d as being from elsewhere(Missouri), but Tate’s easy to google and she was a military kid who grew up all over the place. When Dalton returns from Italy, that sequence and his look in it are VERY reminiscent of the scenes introducing Polanski at the beginning of the film. The side-characters around Tate, perennially shown in a positive light, are also non-Angelenos. Doing Spaghetti Westerns revitalizes Dalton’s career, despite his disdain for Italian cinema. Tate and her crew, while not explicitly ID’d as “Hippies” and often shown in Mod and other fashion styles, are also presented in “Hippie” fashion, shown listening to “Hippie” music, smoking the “Hippie” Reefer(Im sorry, but Comedy Demanded this phrasing and I am Devout u_u), and implied to be living a polyamorous “Hippie” life.

It really is difficult for me to say which predominates. On the one entirely metaphorical hand, the ways in which Dalton’s Angeleno chauvinism are subverted and mocked are fairly obvs, but on the other emh, the film is FILLED with LITERALLY GLOWING nostalgia for this pre-Hippy, pre-Lefty, pre-70s, Conservative and Republican California&Los Angeles. Dalton’s focus on property-ownership&the film industry in the opening thesis could easily be seen as resolving these subversive contradictions to allow for a straight read(ie: Tate, Booth, and Dalton are “Hollywood People” who’ve both bought real-estate in LA, and who’ve grown up in film or film-adjacent fields and choose to center their adult lives in the film industry). So much, in fact, that I kinda started to wonder abt QT’s politics while watching it. And, if it WAS satirical, then what’s the point of the knock to Bruce Lee and focusing criticisms of Polanski on his Polishness and shooting in London? Is that just meant to characterize Dalton and Booth as nativists and racists?

It really cannot be said enough that there are REALLY MORE APPROPRIATE CRITICISMS to make of Polanski than 1)begin Polish, 2)possessing boyish effeminacy, and 3)preferring to shoot movies in London instead of LA. Which are this movie’s only problems with him(though it also takes the time to show him bitchily smoking a cigarette in an evening gown while being rude to a dog). Obvsl I dont object to villainizing an ACTUAL REAL LIFE VILLAIN like this shitstain, but I DO object to being asked(albeit gently) to participate in this film’s understated nationalist bigotry.

It’s possible that Cliff’s turning Pussycat down during the drive to the ranch was intended to be this but I highly doubt it. And if it was it’d be misrepresenting Polanski’s misdeeds enormously, considering that Pussycat, the too-young girl, is the sexual instigator in this film. Polanski liked to manipulate, drug, and rape underaged girls(he pulled the same shit with models in Europe before getting busted for it in LA, btw, then continued doing it after fleeing back to Europe); really not the same situation.

There’s another irony in that, while the film goes out of its way to call Polanski “boyish” and imply that makes him feminine and that this is Bad, there’s also a subtle under-current that... Tarentino sees himself in his youth the same way? He’s certainly never been short like Polanski and Jay Sebring are/were, QT’s 6 1, but the actors he cast to play them and the description made of the pair in-film are more than a bit reminiscent of how Tarentino looked&was discussed in the press back in the 90s when he was starting out. AAAaaand the film explicitly calls that Tate’s “Type”; leaving me with the question: would Tarentino be able to stop himself from implying a dead starlet would have been attracted to him? I leave the answer to your imaginations, Dear Readers u_u

Having said all that it IS a really good film, which I liked, I dont think it’d be very hard to set aside this political stuff while watching, the driving sequences are especially emotive&exhilarating, and there’s some seriously great acting in it. IDK if I’d say I liked it more than the recent Emma movie, tho.

I feel like each of the trio, Tate, Dalton, and Booth, were meant to symbolically Embody LA/Hollywood/California? Like Pitt especially seemed to be channeling movie characters and CJ from GTA: San Andreas throughout his performance, while I couldnt help but think of Ronald Reagan watching DiCaprio(spcl given the character’s likely politics). So there’s this sense in which the film is a fantasy of “Old Hollywood”, embodied by these three, Vanquishing its “Enemies”, represented by The Hippies(moralizing, pretentious, gross leftist) and potentially Polanski&Lee(foreign film ppl who refuse to integrate into the LA scene). Again, given the political history of Cali after this era, this embodiment raises some questions for me abt the film and QT’s politics(particularly in re: misogyny and feminism).

Also DiCaprio is totally going to get pitched a Reagan biopic off of this role and I sincerely hope he has the good sense to turn that shit the fuck down.

Circling back to the ranting at his critics, this movie was definitely and consciously a response to them. Like: up until the last 5-15 minutes of the film, and aside from a handful of too-lingering too fetishistic too on-the-nose creep shots of the female cast that Tarentino simply could not stop himself from making, OUATiH is precisely the sort of “Serious” film Tarentino’s critics have been saying he should make for decades now(of course he did Jackie Brown, which was that and which he blew Completely out of the park). And then there’s that bloody, gross-out, exploitation-movie ending. I dont actually think it was as bad as many critics were saying it was? For some reason I was thinking there was gonna be a massacre of the ENTIRE Manson family, which would have been totally out of left-field. But it WAS clearly a stinger of a major tone-shift thrown in as a Fuck You to the ppl who’ve called out his violent and exploitative preferences throughout the years. As for me I generally like his movies and think he’s a great filmmaker but he absolutely does go too far sometimes.

Rick Dalton, in an evening-gown, with a mixer full of iced-margarita in one hand, getting all up in the face of the driver of a loud exhaust-spewing jalope in his PRIVATE STREET was TOTALLY Tarentino himself :| By which I mean NOT ONLY that That’s ABSOLUTELY the sort of cameo he would have given himself 30 years ago and if it made any sort of sense at all in the film(which here it wouldnt have, obvsl), BUT ALSO that I feel 94% confident that Tarentino has actually done that at least once in his lifetime :| :|

I think the monologue&interactions T gives Bruce Lee leading up to the fight were probably more insulting to him than the fight itself. Contrary to popular discussion, it isn’t Pitt’s character totally trashing Lee, he gets in one good throw after Lee repeats a successful attack at his request(which I doubt Lee would have ever done from what little I know about him; not being predictable in a fight was his whole Deal), but rather an even duel between them(most of the fight is just the two blocking each others’ attacks). I dont think the film was trying to say “Lee was full of hot-air”, if it wanted to say that it’d have shown him getting trounced instead of showing him knock Booth down then trade him blow for blow, but more “Lee was pretty arrogant and a bit pretentious”.

OK, that’s abt all that I can think of right now: thanks for reading ^v^

[docmurph12]

Ok review time. And remember, there is no war in Ba Sing Se.

My next request comes from my very good friend. The last time he and I sat down and tried to watch this was after we cleared through every episode of the animated series this movie was based on. We didnt get through ten minutes. So this was a fun, frustrating challenge. For those noticing, yes this is a retroactive review, instead of a "live" one. Reason for this is that as a fan it would be really difficult to be as objective as possible (given I already know this thing to be really bad) if I was distracted.

So what I know going in is that Shyamalan had a couple big flops and that he picked out this series to be his resurrection, thinking going the large scale epic route would be beneficial to his career. What happened was a ruthlessly infamous flop that resulted in nearly 6 years of silence, jokes, and memes prior to "Split" bringing Shyamalan back to relevance again.

First of all, this film could literally have been directed by anyone. Looking back at my review for Aladdin, I recall saying that I was shocked to find out it was directed by Guy Richey, because all of his hallmark signatures were missing. Same story here; The Last Airbender feels like a basic level cookie cutter epic filmmaking school project. Everything that makes a Shyamalan film is gone, which is crazy because the levity that makes ATLA (the acronym I'll use for the show going forward) is gone too. I have always said that as a director your job is to take what is written (which in this case was written by Shyamalan as well) and use your style to create a visual aspect that compliments the story told by the dialogue and events. Think of this writer/director relationship like one in comics between the writer and the artist. The artist is selected because stylistically he matches what is needed for the story. Great example of a good match is Sin City (picked because of loudness of its specific style). That story doesnt get told the same way or with the same impact with different color palettes, camera work, or actor direction. The Last Airbender is missing everything that gives a person a reason to select a specific director, especially one known for work in small scale supernatural thrillers.

The writing is.....super bad. There are a couple simple tools I like to use to identify if a film has scripting issues as opposed to anything else. First, is the dialogue done in a way that feels contextually natural? Do real people talk this way or is it written like shlockey, overly dramatic stage dialogue (think the Star Wars prequel trilogy)? Second, how easy is the story to follow? Are there gaping plot holes? Is it subtle with a good surprise? Does it hit you in the face with a story shovel with a handle made of heavy handed expositional dialogue?

Lastly, how hard are the actors trying to act around your script? Is it a good film where great performances outweigh poor to middling dialogue (Batman V Superman), or is it Bloodrayne? I've said enough on that, you get the point. That said, I am not sure the actors could have been saved by a better script. The cast was very poorly selected. Insensitive at worst (though I genuinely think the brown dude that insisted on the specific and coincidentally white folk he picked probably DIDN'T have a whitewashing agenda given what he said prior to release), out of touch with the source material at best, picking the virtual unknowns that he did really didnt pan out for him. The kid cast as Aang (pronounced AAng, goddamnit, not ONG, more on that later) got the role because he looks like the character, kind of, and only had a week of acting school worth of experience prior to filming the movie. Let's just say it definitely showed.

I am not sure TOTALLY crucifying the cast is entirely fair, so let's move the witch hunt to almost everything else. There is some good though, I promise so hang in there.

I really hope the editor got sent back to school. The purpose of editing is to make a cut that not only maintains but heightens interest in what you are watching. Cutting the fat in order to get to the point while not giving the movie away. Sometimes that means giving more than a 90 minute cut (which Shyamalan has taken at least partial responsibility for in this case) in order to preserve the story. There are scenes where the continuity from one cut to the next doesnt match up. Like consecutive cuts in one scene with massive distances traveled between cuts and even in at least one case a partial or complete costume change. It's extremely jarring. Something else about cuts--generally you cut to another angle or scene because the film requires you to in order to display more information that you wouldn't get in one single long cut. Usually a film has choppy cuts in it because the scene requires an character to do something the actor can't, or because the director or editor are bad at their job. The story, or sometimes in lucky cases just one scene, suffers as a result of bad or needless cuts. This is the case here. The strange thing is there are truly WONDERFUL long cuts of fight scenes that really suck you in, but the wierd juxtaposition between great non-editing and strange and bad editing really kicks you in the head. Enough on that. On to the next.

I did NOT see this movie in 3d. I understand that the conversion was really bad, but that said what I CAN speak to is the VFX. This film, with the exception of the lighting, was pretty well put together in terms of effects. There were really only a couple issues that were glaring in terms of VFX, but by and large it wasnt awful. There are definitely newer films that look worse. In standard. I dont know about 3d.

I think the thing that makes this film more frustrating than anything is that there are things about this movie I love. They are few and far between, but I really do love them. The intro was a really neat callback to the series intro to each episode. Then the movie happens. Then, the flying bison appears!! Then more movie. Then, a scene where Aang (not Awng) uses the glider in his staff. Then more movie. Then, all the practical martial arts, then, yet more movie. It's like this the entire way. Best comparison here? Green Lantern. It's like the Shyamalan said, "Hey, I like this and need a career boost.", then proceeded to cherry pick things from a beloved series and then ham and egged a movie with a confusing plot that absolutely requires you to be super familiar with the source material. There are a lot of assumptions made by characters in the movie that made sense given background provided by the show, but make absolutely none if you are going in blind. "Those are air bending tattoos, and I think he might be the avatar, despite he fact that I havent seen him bend anything and airbenders havent even been seen in over 100 years! Before my time!" Fucking come on. Throw the newcomers here a bone man.

The long story short here is I guess in spite of the casting decisions, editing, and direction, a good script could have made at least a fun movie. This movie should not have made it past script in the form we all saw it though, and it makes one wonder how much pressure was on everyone involved (almost all of it internally applied, Shyamalan did this project almost entirely on his own volition and cast a bunch of almost unknowns with the exception of maybe Cliff Curtis, so of course they said yes) to join in and take part in this without asking questions. Its upsetting to know the original showrunners were as ostracized as they were on this thing.

I dont see myself going back. Yes there were things that made me smile a little, but the film as a whole is so overwhelmingly bad in the face of those things it is just not worth it. I AM however going to go and rewatch the series with my wife and the kids for their first time, and maybe as a result of having to sit through this war crime of a film adaptation.

Final Verdict? I give it a D-. Purely out of respect for the very small handful of things I did appreciate. Next up?? The Lobster. Really looking forward to that one.

[goshilovemyfos]

I wanna hear some headcanons about your f/os!!

Aaaaaa yes! Thank you! 

Charun

* Charun’s skin is a few shades darker than the light grey you normally see on trolls - they’re a bit closer to granite than anything else, and they have freckles e v e r y w h e r e !! Mostly concentrated on their shoulders and cheeks.

* Their hands are rough from callouses and firm, and warm bc of their blood color. Their hands are also very nice to hold, 10/10.

* Charun is at least 6′4 and laughs when i gotta reach up on my tiptoes to kiss them - thankfully they aren’t mean and do bend down to meet me.

* Doesn’t understand memes but likes the “Oh worm?” one and tolerates my usage of them constantly.

Charun: Repots a plant

Me: Fucking superb you funky little enby

Charun, used to this sort of thing and therefore unfazed: Thanks

Lanque

* He loves jewelry and always pairs a few bracelets/necklaces with his outfits. It also means that he gets me a lot too, though its plainer than his bc I’m not one for flashy things. Anything I get him is treasured and something I bought is always incorporated into an outfit.

* A real romantic. He always wants to go all out on dates (candlelit dinner, dancing in the twilight, fairs, etc) and is a serial flirt. Like,

Lanque: I believe I’ve seen you in a dream before. Could it be that our meeting here is fate?

Me: Lanque this is our kitchen. We’ve been dating for two years

* Actually reeeeeaallly likes his hair to be played with and will lay his head in my lap for me to do so. His hair is really soft and fluffy despite the product he uses, and it curls slightly in humidity.

Shouta and Yamada

* First thing to know is that we are diasters, so jot that down. Thankfully our personalities make for enough balance to create one (1) Functional person. This is totally fine.

* Hero work is sometimes really draining on the three of us. Most times its a guessing game as to who’ll be home first; that person is the one who cooks for the others. A lot of date nights are spent on the couch, cuddling/napping with a movie on in the background, nothing too big.

- Actual, planned dates are quite often to those animal cafes that litter Japan - I like the puppy cafes, Shouta likes the cat cafes, and Yamada likes the owl cafes. 

* Yamada isn’t shy about PDA, and loves to hold our hands and kiss us and is generally like “omg look at my amazing partners I LOVE YOU TWO!!!”

- I’m a little more subtle abt how I show them affection. I generally squeeze their hands or nudge/nuzzle them for a quick second.

- Shouta isn’t big on giving us affection in public, and thats alright! Yamada and I can give enough for the three of us. When at home, Shouta is usually the one to initiate a snuggle session or peck our foreheads gently.

* Our laundry is such a mess just like our fashion tastes like. It’s so funny.

- Yamada’s got that street fashion thing going on when he gets out of his Hero uniform so we have everything from parachute pants to crop tops and jumpsuits and. Somehow he pulls it all off?

- Shouta has the same shirt/pants times twenty so pulling the clothes from the dryer is just a mass of black fabric almost every time.

- I wear a lot of neutral t-shirts and blue jeans so I basically have to label my stuff or it’ll all be stolen by Yamada. I’ve found him unknowingly (and knowingly) wearing one of my shirts countless times.

Me: hey Yama you’re wearing one of my shirts

Yamada, grinning: Like it? It was a steal.

[choisgirls]

Aight fam. What if MC had just...(clenches fist)...fucking sweet, Grade-A natural titties and had a fondness for keyhole sweaters? AND ON TOP OF THAT GOODNESS, what if they had an absolutely adorable little dusting of freckles along that yummy bit of skin that showed whenever they wore something to compliment their kick-ass cleavage? (Looooove y'all, btw. ❤)

A/N: When I got thisrequest I laughed my ass off at “Grade-A natural titties” and I’mstill laughing oh my gOD, weewooweewoo ur under arrest?? for BEST TITTIES,,,,

This might be shortbecause;;; smh who doesn’t love that?????? I also don’t know if this is NSFW?So LIGHT NSFW i suppose?? Idk i mean its talking about tiTTIES so you decide

*YOOSUNG:

               A blushing mess. Every time he’stalking to you and just so happens to glance down, bam, there it is- the heatin his face. 10/10 he can’t help but stare. Once he sees you in a low-cut shirtand he gets glance, his eyes are glued to them. You asked a question? He’sstuttering but never breaks eye contact with them. Keyhole sweaters? The poorboy’s eyes might as well be physically /on/ your chest because he’s alwaysleaning in close to look further down them. Tries to count all of yourfreckles. What a p er v

*ZEN:

               Biting his knuckles, taking in asharp breath, tears of joy in his eyes and a blush across his face. That’s hisdefault look when he sees you in sweaters like that because BOY OH BOY you arehis PRINCESS and he swears to god you’re doing it on purpose to test his beast.You wear it out, sure, fine! Someone else is looking at your cleavage? They’regetting a beAT DOWN because NO. Don’t you DARE ogle his loves breasts, that is/his/ job. He will kiss each and every freckle he finds on them don’t test him.

*JAEHEE:

               Weewooweewoo in the best tittiesclub. The both of you are wearing matching keyhole sweaters sometimes and dearlord /neither/ of you can look away. It’s a straight contest for both of yourchests. When the both of you are out in public it’s a mess because others liketo notice too. She politely tells them to knock it off, of course, but still-the two of you have a great time just owning your bodies and loving each otherjust the way you are. She’s also constantly finding herself clearing her throatand feeling suffocated when she see’s your freckles.

*JUMIN:

               Frantically buying you keyholesweaters, dresses, shirts- starts cutting holes into your normal shirts toountil you stop him. He can’t help it, there’s just something so… sexy, andmature about it. Is he always staring at your chest? Of course not, but he willbe very protective of them, like he is with the rest of you. Someone glancesdown a little too long in his presence he’ll place himself in front of you,doesn’t even make it subtle. And if you ever think badly about those freckleshe will make a whole powerpoint presentation on how you are so very wrong.

*SAEYOUNG:

               "MAKE WAY FOR THE OWNER OFB ES T TI TTIES" Saeyoung, nO. Literally he loves them so much. He’llsneak glances when in public but at home he is all hands. And head- he shoveshis head through the hole of your sweater just to get close to them. Sometimeshe claims his hands are cold and needs to warm them up on your heaters and it’susually a lie just to hold your boobs. Sometimes he isn’t kidding and his handsare frozen. Those freckles on your chest though? He’s kissing them, callingthem his stars, or he’s playing connect the dots with a marker there is no inbetween.

*DADDV:

               His WEAKNESS. He tries not toshow it on his face but he’s usually very happy when you’re wearing anythingwith a keyhole. “Oh I was just looking at your necklace MC, it looks great,”he says as he’s looking down your shirt. You ever stop to wonder why in theworld he’s always taking more pictures of you when you’re wearing your sweater?It’s because he thinks you’re absolutely gorgeous and loves that you’recompletely owning your chest like that. You go MC, that’s his MC. Oh and don’tworry your freckles are basically the focal point of some of his picturesbecause they? Are? Adorable?

*SAERAN:

               HE’S NOT LOOKING. HE SWEARS. Nobut really he is and a lot of the time he doesn’t even hide it. “Are youlooking at my chest?” “Yeah.” like, OKAY THANKS. He actuallygets really cute and sweet when you’re wearing a keyhole sweater. He tells youhow beautiful you look and how much he loves you- so long as no one else canhear him tell you all of these things. Anyone besides him looking at yourchest? They’re gonna catch these hands because you, and your chest are h i s.Your freckles just give him an excuse to run his finger along your chestlightly so he can touch each and every one of them so they don’t feel left out.

Masterlist

[bloomngloom]

Guess Who Saw Les Mis and wrote down all the crazy shit to share with you?

Boy oh boy was that An Experience. I can’t even right now (never thought I would say that unironically). Ok so all the longer shit I’ll bullet here and then other little things will be under the cut. Please keep in mind that this was my first live Les Mis and I do not know what is normal and what is unique to what I saw. Here goes:

Gav shows up about ½ through A Little Fall of Rain. She doesn’t see him. Grantaire eventually follow, and puts a hand on his shoulder. When she finally dies Gav whips around and wraps himself around R. Eventually, after they take her body away, only her hat and- a few feet away- Marius remain. Gav picks up her hat and hands it to Marius.

In Drink With Me, R starts out like your usual drunkard, absurdly. He smiles a bit, joking grabs some woman’s ass (keep in mind Enj is staring intensely from the top of the barricade). Then he riles up the crowd in a different way. His tone turns bitter. You can see he is visibly shaking up the people. By this point, Enj has climbed down the barricade. He reaches for R (I thought at first he was going in for a hug, but he was more likely reaching to touch his shoulder) and R steps away. He then wanders to the sewer/door/exit to stage left (drinking all the way) and makes as if to leave but Gav stops him. They spend almost the whole song hugging, then take a nap together.

[If you read below the cut before reading this- boy oh boy] When Gav goes to get the ammunition, you can’t see him. I had a feeling that that is normal, but it was unsettling all the while. Especially in the silence after the first shot. Then he starts singing again. Eventually you see him climbing over the top of the barricade. Even I thought he was gonna pull through. Then he stops for half a second- then he falls limply into Enjolras’ arms. Enj turns, cradling him to his chest, and steps slowly down the barricade, til he gets to the 2nd lowest point. R stands on the ground. There is a long pause- perhaps the 2nd longest in the show. They stare at each other. Eventually, almost reluctantly, Enj hands Gav over to R. R makes it to center stage and holds Gav and just… looks at him. I thought he was going to scream in agony. Perhaps that would have been kinder than the silence we were left with. Then they move to the direct right of center stage. Things go on, but R grieves for a long time.

Once another person dies (by falling off the barricade next to Gav and R) Enj finally comes down. R moves from Gav to this dead man. They straighten him out together. There is a subtle pause as they look at each other. Something happens. Maybe they touched each others faces. Maybe they touched foreheads. Maybe they kissed. I couldn’t tell, and will forever regret that. Enj goes back up the barricade. The story goes on.

You know how Enjolras is iconically the last Barricade Boy to die whilst holding the flag? How he usually falls and hangs backward off the barricade? Not this time. I know for sure that this is A Way to do this scene. 

Once the bullets really start flying, things happen fast. First, there he is with the flag. But he is shot, and the flag falls off the barricade. He tries to straighten up, fist held aloft in the air. He falls limply face first off the barricade. He is perhaps the second or third of the men remaining to die. After that it is chaos, but one thing is clear in my mind. As the fall of the barricade winds down, two men attempt to climb from the ground to the top, to their deaths. One barely makes it halfway. The other reaches where Enj stood, but can’t even pull himself to his feet before he is killed. He raises his hand high. Instead of the blood red flag, or simply darkness, the last image of the rebellion is a green glass wine bottle, illuminated by two spotlights. Everything else fades to black. For a half a heartbeat, the bottle is burned into your mind. 

The longest pause of the show happens just before Javert’s Suicide. He climbs out and over the barricade and sees all the dead students. He then goes to the stage left sewer entrance as if he knows Valjean is down there. The barricade goes away and it is just Javert and Gav’s dead body, the only body he hasn’t seen (kind of). You think he is going over there, but no. No, at that moment two men come on with a giant cart. They whip it around and there, finally in that iconic pose, flag clutched in one hand other hanging limp, is Enjolras. There is something startling about seeing him like that without the grandeur of the barricade or the power of the window. He seems smaller, realer. Javert raise his torch above him but you could hardly tell because at that moment the two most brilliant of spotlights hits him and he glows. He is bathed in the purest light. You can barely see anyone else on stage except for perhaps, Gav. Everything is frozen like that for a long time. You are hardly aware of time at all. It’s how Hugo would have wanted it.

Turning was a funeral. There was a little girl. The women leave candles out and Marius joins them. They leave. He is alone, surrounded by candle light for most of Empty Chairs. Then, as he sings “the very words that they-” and out come the boys. They each stand behind a candle. He doesn’t notice them until “Phantom faces at the window!” That line has never seemed so loud. The boys hold their candles up as if toasting him, and by the time their candles return to their hearts they are out. Eventually, all but Enj leave. Marius sings the rest of his song facing away from us- to Enj. When E leaves and Marius turns, his lit candle is all you can really see.

When Gav says Larmarque is dead he is standing on the table. Before he sings Enj gently picks him up and puts him back on the ground. It feels v parent like.

When Ep enters a man grabs her from behind Lovely Ladies style. She like, elbows him in the dick and pulls his knife out of his pocket, threatens him with it, and then graciously hand it back to him. This is only the first time in the show this happens.

When Ep screams and is punched to the ground by Thenadier as he leaves, Cosette is the first to help her up and comfort her. Marius basically drags Ep away and honestly seemed like an asshole

Mdme. Thenadier was psychotic??? When she sang “but there’s not much there” she rips off the tip of a baguette and spends the rest of her part hacking it violently with a knife??? 

The Thenadiers grind up some blind guys canary lmao

Mdme T trying to seduce Valjean is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.

When Valjean gives Cosette the doll and then swings her around in the air I actually felt my heart melting

When Enj says “Marius you’re no longer a child” he doesn’t even sing it its so motherly he’s like scolding him its iconic

Almost all of Patron-Minette was there and they made sure we knew by having Thenadier do role call every single fucking time they showed up thank god it was only like twice

There were women holding guns on the barricade but left before they got to shoot them.

When Javert is singing “And I am Javert! Do not forget my name.. do not forget me..” another guard is holding Valjean’s face, forcing him to look Javert in the eyes. Its so clear that this moment will define these two men’s lives and Valjean literally cannot look away. it was a v nice touch

the part where the Bishop tells VJ that his soul is God’s now actually made me shiver?? I usually find it so unremarkable

I have heard a LOT of Bring Him Homes. That was the best.

Enj was Enj. Tall, higher voice than you would think. Not to mention his hair. The most luscious golden locks.

During the end of Red and Black and the beginning of Do You Hear Enj is standing on a large pile of boxes (mini barricade?) in the Musain. The others are crowded around him, except for Grantaire who clearly stands apart. He is paying just as much attention as the rest, but you can tell for different reasons. He pulls Gav away from the throng of people and holds him to his cheast. 

During Red and Black when R sings his Don Juan line, he holds his ever present wine bottle to his crotch and violently mimes jacking off

WOAH this is long! Sorry! Tagging @r-we-taire-yet cause you mentioned you hadn’t seen it and I felt you might appreciate a thought dump.