#and i also feel like crying and suppress it so maybe the amount of effort it takes me to shed a single tear tires me enough to take a nap

[darkacademicfrom2021]

I just realized that just as smokers get upset and want to smoke, or sugar addicts want doughnuts; when I'm upset I want to take a nap.

[animeomegas]

Who is the most needy while in heat?

I decided to write for a few characters for different categories: Clingiest, Horniest, Territorial and Requires Support. Enjoy~

Who is the clingiest:

1.     Itachi – Itachi has only ever had soft heats in his life(heats that are not sexually, but instead emotionally charged). He didn’t have his first heat until he was already part of the Akatsuki and didn’t feel safe enough for a proper heat. His health also isn’t the best, so his body knows to have soft heats rather than normal heats. Because he only has these types of heats, they are very strong. He feels a constant urge to be by your side, ideally with you touching him at all times. He can’t take suppressants because they mess with his illness, so he can’t minimise the effects. He spends the two days holed up in his room, the door locked and sealed shut. He won’t let you leave his nest much, growling and whining if you try. His instincts are screaming at him that he has to protect you and that you have to protect him. He can get a little addled and confused because the impulses are too strong. He’s extremely clingy in heat and he hates it. He always feels embarrassed afterwards.

2.     Izuku – Izuku is prone to crying and feeling very rejected if you neglect him during his preheat or heat. He feels the sting of rejection very strongly and feeling abandoned during a heat is… not good for omegas to put it lightly. It can make them sick if it’s serious enough. So, Izuku will definitely try and keep you in his nest as much as possible, asking wordlessly to be carried with you if you need to leave for a moment. Going to work or leaving the house during his heats (even when he’s on suppressants) is a no-no for him. He will do anything to get you to stay with him, including but not limited to hiding your keys, seducing you, and begging.

3.     Mammon – From the second he’s in preheat, he literally will not leave you alone. He’s very attention starved, but his slight tsundere tendencies keep him from acting on his need for affection. His heat and preheat remove the tsundere tendencies and make him even more desperate for attention. He’s hanging off of his Alpha constantly, following them around and sleeping in their room. He enjoys laying on top of them while they stroke his hair or rub his back. Will growl away anyone who tries to take you from him. If the growling doesn’t work, he’ll whine at you to stay with him because he knows you can’t refuse him when he’s like that.

4.     Kaoru – He doesn’t like how clingy he is, but it’s very uncomfortable for an omega to ignore their heat urges, so he doesn’t bother trying to resist it. He’s very prone to loneliness when he’s in heat or preheat, so he likes it if you’re with him as much as possible. He will spend most the time sitting on your lap, innocently and not so innocently.

5.     L – He isn’t particularly fussed about constant physical affection, but he wants you to be in the same room as him at all times. He constantly turns away from his work to make sure you’re still sitting in the room with him, and in the evenings, he likes if he can sit on your lap while he works. His heats are reduced from suppressants, and his libido is very low generally, but he still likes to make sure his alpha is safe and with him during his heat and be surrounded by his alpha’s scent.

Who is the most territorial during heat:

1.     Sasuke – Will straight up growl at anyone who gets too close to you both, and it won’t end well if someone shows up at his house when he’s in heat. Sasuke immediately views whoever it is as a threat and would likely try and attack them, especially if they were a stranger or someone he didn’t like. He is a lot less stressed during this time if you both just hole up at home for his preheat and heat. One of the reasons he makes his nest in a walk in wardrobe is because it’s an easily defendable place.

2.     Shikamaru – He has to have an arm around you or vice versa at all times. He makes sure you always smell like him during his preheats, just as a warning to other omegas. In heat, he gets very intense and caught up in the feelings, so interruptions from outsiders will be jarring and he’s likely to react aggressively.

3.     Shinsou – Is very paranoid when in heat and preheat. He gets nervous about people coming to try and hurt him and his mate while he’s weak, so he doesn’t like anyone he doesn’t know around you or him. Shinsou is fiercely protective of his family and his alpha. When he’s actually in heat, he would probably try to attack anyone who got too close.

4.     Belphie – Likes to just lay down and sleep with you when he’s in preheat, and whenever any of his brothers (or anyone else) try and get you to move, he growls them away, wrapping his arms around your chest to stop you from going anywhere. Would definitely bite someone if they were brave enough to try and remove him from you by force. When he’s in heat, he uses compulsion charms to keep people away from the attic where he likes to spend his heat with you.

5.     Diavolo – He can’t keep his hands or lips off of his alpha during preheat, but not just in a horny way, mainly in a ‘they’re mine’ kind of way. He likes to show off his relationship to others as a warning to stay away. He is delightfully smug if you return the treatment.

6.     Kusuo – He pretends he isn’t being territorial when he’s in preheat, but whenever you end up in conversation with someone, Kusuo is just suddenly standing next to you, I wonder how that happened? He also makes a way greater effort to ditch anyone who might interrupt his alone time with you. He turns his friends away if they show up at his door when he’s in preheat. When in heat, he gets off on the ‘you’re mine and I’m yours’ aspect.

7.     Light – This boy in greedy for your attention when he’s in preheat, and very bitter if he doesn’t get enough of it. He directs most of his anger at anyone who he perceives as taking you away from him. He will lie and manipulate others away from you both during this time with zero hesitation or regret. Would be possessive if you gave too much attention to a book while he’s in heat.

Who needs the most support:

1.     Alois – I headcanon that Alois has some specific heat related trauma, that I’m not going to get into right now, that impacts him greatly. His alpha is his protection. He only feels safe during his heat if you’re there with him. If you leave him alone, even just for a minute, he will panic, fear mixing with his already heat addled brain. For that reason, he needs a great deal of support, he needs a gentle touch and a constant presence.

2.     Shouto – His father paid to have him on illegal grade suppressant without him knowing just after Shouto’s quirk came in. Endeavour got the quirk he wanted, but not the dynamic he wanted, so he tried to change that. He experiences similar heats to Neji when he first comes off of suppressants. He’s so sensitive everywhere that it hurts. He wants to be touched so badly, but it hurts him. His alpha needs to work with him slowly to help him overcome the sensitivity.

3.     Neji – I mentioned before that due to the suppressant abuse that was inflicted on Neji as a child, his heats can be very painful, especially at first, much like Shouto. For a more in-depth analysis, I have headcanons on Neji’s suppressant abuse listed on my pinned masterlist.

4.     Keigo (Hawks) – He suffers from really bad paranoia during his heats. At first, it’s unclear what’s triggering the paranoia, but eventually it becomes clear that his treatment in the hands of the Commission have left him some nasty mental scars. When Keigo is in heat, he needs to have the door locked and bolted, the windows lock and covered with thick curtains and blinds, he needs to be rid of all technology or anything a person could use to contact him, and he needs all supplies to be in his nest with him so that neither you nor him have to leave that one room. It’s why the room he nests in must have an ensuite. He tends to have soft heats (emotionally charge rather than sexually charged) because his paranoia makes his body think he’s in too much danger to have a proper heat. It’s lucky that his heats normally only last for a day.

 (N-sfw under cut~)

Who is the horniest:

1.     Sebastian – He barely manages to keep it together during the day when he has to serve Ciel, but at night? You better be fucking him so well that he can’t stay coherent. He needs a full eight hours of sex before the heat withdraws enough for him to focus. A demon’s heat is very intensive after all.

2.     Kakashi – Every little thing sets him off when he’s in heat. Maybe you knotted him and the heat is subsiding a little, but then you bit your lip or stretch in a certain way, and immediately he’s consumed by his heat again. He struggles to keep it in his trousers long enough to hydrate and sleep. Sometimes he needs to cockwarm his alpha just to be able to calm his instincts enough to sleep.

3.     Tamaki A – He gets so horny at the peaks of his heat that any and all nervousness completely vanishes. He will beg his alpha shamelessly to get what he needs. He cannot control his voice at all, so you better hope your neighbours are forgiving, because Amajiki shouts some filthy things when he feels really good.

4.     Asmo – No one is surprised that he is completely and overwhelmingly horny for his entire heat. Most omegas have down moments for resting and hydrating while their heat isn’t so bad. Not Asmo. His heat lasts for three days (a maximum amount) and is intense for all of it. You have to make him to eat and drink something while he begs and writhes on your lap for you to fuck him.

5.     Kiba – Has a very high sex drive in general, even when he’s not in heat, so it’s no surprise that he’s basically insatiable when he’s in heat. He jumps his alpha five times a day when he’s in preheat, and every hour when he’s in heat. If you can’t provide for him as often as he needs, he will absolutely buy a knotted dildo and use it while he’s on top of you. Most of the time that convinces his alpha to help him get off.

[yesimwriting]

Hi!!! I was wondering if you could do like a short story post or something I wonder how Our General Kirigan would react to a shy reader? Would he tease her? Be frustrated with her? And how would she react? Idk maybe just a thought 😅 I asked you because i really like your writing and I feel like you would really do a good job and I like the way you portray the General. 😊

a/n i have been crying/feeling shitty for the past two days for no reason!! so i thought it might make me feel better to try writing headcanons! i have SO MANY half done requests/fics but as of recently i hate everything that i write!! so i thought i'd work on this request that lends itself to headcanons

also im glad you like my writing :))

--

General Kirigan with a shy! reader headcanons:

- First things first, I think how he interacts with someone shy that he sees as a (potential) romantic interest varies per situation. Like generally, he finds the timidness kind of soft which is so different from what he's used to that he finds that aspect kind of endearing.

- He'd never admit that at the beginning, but the more time you spend with him the clearer it becomes to you because of how he acts when you're alone together

- At first, he'd hold onto his usual stoic disposition, but after realizing that at the end of the day your shyness is genuine and not an attempt to seem meek in order to trick people/him he'd begin to tease you about it when you two are alone.

- The first time he makes a comment that's just a little,, kinda-almost suggestive (a comment about how he wonders what it'd be like to be a Heartrender so that he could hear the change in your heartbeat every time you shied away from something) you're too confused to be embarrassed for like two seconds.

- You're basically that meme that's like did I hear that shit righttt??

- So you meet his gaze, and there's absolutely nothing but warm confidence there and you realize that he had in fact,,, said that.

- You hold his gaze for a moment out of protest (which is an incredible feat) and then you have to drop your eyes to the floor. You mumble some comment about how his ability to summon shadows isn't exactly a boring skill.

- Your reaction is so soft,, Kirigan can't help but be endeared even further. Something he wasn't exactly expecting and isn't too thrilled about. He doesn't think being shy makes you weak,, but he's extremely wary about how you're perceived and how people may treat you because of it.

- He doesn't doubt his ability to protect you, but he doesn't want to be distracted,, not with all he has to do.

- Still, he can't help mumble comments whenever there's a brief pause and you two are alone

- Meanwhile, you're starting to notice that now more situations keep coming up when you're left alone with Kirigan?? like he's always in the library when you are, he's always walking in to assess training when you're training and he just so happens to linger until you leave and then he just so happens needs to walk in the same hallway.

- It's a little strange at first,, but you're more horrified by the fact that you're not mad about it than the fact that it's happening. Especially since you know how much joy he gets from getting you flustered. You can see that in that slightly cocky uptilt to his lips whenever you're left gaping at him.

- Why doesn't it bother you?? You try to rationalize it and the only conclusion you can come to is the fact that he's attractive and powerful and even though your face gets hot whenever he talks to you,, there's appeal in those qualities. There's appeal in getting the infamous General to smile.

- Even if it costs you the bit of pride you have.

- You don't get why you're the one he seems to be going out of his way to speak to (maybe when your life is as stressful as his is,, at the end of the day you just want something easy and if he's in the mood to be flirty, you're easy) but you're not mad. You just have to constantly remind yourself to not be foolish enough to think you're the only one he goes out of his way to talk to.

- And as time progresses, you get a little more comfortable with his banter. You stop shying away completely,, which only encourages him to get bolder with his comments.

- Nothing insane,, not yet, just a little more direct.

- It kind of becomes a little game to him,, to see how flustered he can get you with the minimal amount of effort. Every once in awhile, you manage to act normally, but he's quick to shut that down by upping his game just slightly.

- After awhile, it starts to become a game for you too, to see how much of your instincts you can suppress just to take away some of his satisfaction. Only when he's getting a little too smug.

- But that's when y'all are alone...

- When you're surrounded by others, sometimes it feels like you don't even exist to each other. Sometimes that's a lonely feeling for both of you, but each of you is convinced that they're the only one that feels the absence.

- In your defense, you're much more entitled to those feelings because he can literally do whatever he wants. You can't just walk up to the General and do what?? ask him why he hasn't made any suggestive comment in the last couple of hours??

- please that embarrassing!! even if you weren't shy, that would be out of POCKET

- Meanwhile Kirigan is just like being angsty and debating the implications of seeking you out in an environment with so many important people. He could probably manage a minute or two by your side without making anyone suspicious, but the danger in that is that he won't be able to bring himself to leave after those minutes pass him.

- Worse,, he may even find an excuse for both of you to step out into the hall so that he can make his comments and take in your reactions in private.

- It's especially difficult when you have that one strand of hair just slightly out of place,, presenting the perfect excuse for him to just fix it and then drop his hand slowly so that his fingertips can brush the side of your cheek.

- And you're growing tired of the crowds of people you're not comfortable with and you're starting to feel more and more stupid for letting something that was so clearly just a playful distraction mean anything to you.

- But before either of you can succumb to your angsty pinning (cough, cough,, simps) his eyes will find yours from across the room and that's EVERYTHING

- At first, you want to be stiff and look away because it's probably not intentional, but then he gives you that little smirk. And then you feel stupid for ever doubting that you two at least have some kind of friendship. (maybe more,, but you're too scared to let yourself think that,, ;))

- And then you give him this shy smile,, and that's it. He's done--that one look undoes him entirely.

- So he starts shifting towards you as casually as possible, because if he can't be with you right now, surely being near you is good enough for now.

- You're unaware of this,, and when the moment ends you find yourself longing for more, but relatively satisfied. You don't expect anything from him, he's important and you're you.

- And being around people drains you because you genuinely want to stay out of any situation that would have too much attention on you at once. So once Kirigan moves and you can't find him in the crowd, you decide now is as good a time as any to step out and get some air, especially since no one currently needs you for anything.

- So you disappear into the corridor, planning to be gone only for a few minutes. But the second you're about two steps into the hallway, you hear another's footsteps.

- The hopeful part of you is like 'maybe it's him!!' but you don't really think that. There's something about the atmosphere that feels too tense,, too wrong for you to believe it's him.

- A moment later, your suspicions are confirmed. A grisha known for his impulsiveness is calling out to you, asking you where you're going.

- You explain that you just wanted to get some air and that you'd be returning in a minute. You try to sound dismissive, clearly establishing that you'd like your minute to yourself.

- It's clear that he understands the hint, but he doesn't move. He just keeps asking you questions.

- Your answers get shorter and shorter, the nerves your feeling tensing with each word as he begins to venture from falsely casual conversation to more flirtatious words. Being shy can leave you speaking too much, spluttering out words in hopes of saying the right thing to let you escape, but this is a different type of nervousness. Something feels wrong.

- And he just keeps saying things, things that even Kirigan wouldn't be able to get away with.

- All the while, you're desperate to escape, but they're persistent.

- And just when you're losing hope, and his advances get so bold he has you literally backed into a corner--a familiar voice comes to you like a lifeline.

- Kirigan, with all the authority of the general, questions what's going on. The guy that was so relentlessly hitting on you moves back like suddenly you're fire and begins to back away. He tries to explain himself but Kirigan is not having it.

- As soon as the stranger leaves, you feel like you can breathe again, but your nerves are still on edge. Kirigan's looking at you in a way you've never seen before. Sharp and almost--almost angry?

- You try to mumble a quick thanks, intending to disappear back to where you're supposed to be, but Kirigan's gaze keeps you planted against the wall.

- His gaze is so intense you ask him if he's alright.

- The question cracks something in him because of course you'd ask him if he's okay after something happened to you. His expression softens slightly, which you think is a good thing but then he speaks,, and his voice is not calm at all

- He's mad at the person that did that and the irrational part of him makes it seem like he's a little mad at you for letting that situation happen, but it's only because he's worried about what would have happened if he hadn't gotten there in time.

- And you're kind of confused because like?? what does he want from you? you made it clear you were uncomfortable and you were trying to get away?

- But after a quick snap and the fact that you're okay settles in,, he does feel a little bad. So he comes close to apologizing,, but that's basically just him saying he's glad that you're okay.

- You don't really ease, so he decides to make a partial joke about how maybe he needs to be around you more,, just to be safe,, you know

- And you smile slightly, and you're like 'y'know i'm not completely helpless.'

- and he's like 'pity,, i would've liked the excuse'

- your face instantly feels extremely warm and you're not sure what you could even, plausibly say to that. But you can't let him have the last word,, not like that. So you're overcompensating, rambling, but then at the end...you say something about how he doesn't really need an excuse to stay near you.

- When you realize what you've said, fight or flight kicks in,, but you can't move. And there's no casual way to escape, so you decide that maybe you'll cut your losses for today because that might have been your most significant reply to him ever, and you feel like an idiot because he was probably joking. And you just had to say that and make it weird.

- So you allow exactly one second of unfortunate silence, your eyes glued to the ground. And then you make some excuse about needing to get back to where you were.

- But Kirigan stops you, and you think about how you can't avoid looking him in the eyes forever, so you just kind of barely dare to glance upwards.

- And he's smiling broader than usual, the look is so warm it melts away all the bad feelings from earlier. You have absolutely no idea what it means, but you know it's not...bad.

- And then he shifts slightly, and that's when you realize he's never been this close before.

- He then asks if you're sure, voice much lower than earlier.

- You can't speak,, too trapped on a line you don't understand.

- But as he leans forward, the only answer he needs is the instinctual part of your lips as his warm breath reaches your cheek.

- And with that he turns his head just a fraction of an inch,, and his lips meet yours.

- It's just a quick brush of lips,, a soft test. And when you don't protest, he moves to let the contact be a little more assured, yet still teasing.

- Something in you grows impatient, and you move a little in hopes that he'll take the hint.

- But that's all it takes for him to pull away, expression bright and teasing before playfully chiding you for being so eager.

- He then turns, leaving you more flustered than ever.

[thefanficmonster]

Just thought about this as a story or headcanons, maybe the lords in re8 have a child, which is the reader and they are somewhere around 7 in the beginning. You can do them all separately, like first part would be Heisenberg, then Dimitrescu, Beneviento, and then Moreau, so the reader would accidentally do something and they are scared that the lord that is their parent would be super mad and they run away and the lords reactions to their child being gone and maybe the reader goes back to the village older, maybe 14 or 15 and the lords are emotional when they finally reunite with the reader. Maybe at first they don't recognize the reader at first, thinking they are just an outsider until they see something that they gave the reader as a birthday present and they recognize them. And it's just full fluff in the end? This has also been bugging my mind for a while 🤣 sorry if this ask was complicated to read

Heyy ~ lovely idea as always hun! I changed it up a bit, hope you don't mind and still enjoy reading it nonetheless 💗

Alcina Dimitrescu

- Being the youngest Dimitrescu, you were expected to be a bit of a spoiled brat since our mother and sisters looked after you like the most precious and rarest gem in this world - Surprisingly though, you were a very well behaved child - A shy, quiet, well-mannered kid that followed their mother's rules like they were the law - But even you weren't immune to that childish curiosity that every kid possesses - So you had to go on and break a rule or two eventually - However, the biggest one you broke, the one that had you sweating nervously, was sneaking down into the basement where the wine your mother and sisters were so proud of was kept - With trembling hands you picked up one of the bottles, the one with the most interesting pattern on the bottle, and began to expect it - That’s when a noise suddenly echoed throughout the basement, causing you to drop the bottle which broke as soon as it the ground, sending the red liquid splashing everywhere - You were mortified - You were only six at the time, you couldn’t think of a strategy to fix the mess you had made - So instead, you chose to run and hide, convinced you’d get in A LOT of trouble when your mother would find out - The place you chose to hide in was a run down part of the courtyard where you were least likely to be spotted by anyone or anything - Your plan started backfiring only about an hour after you settled in your hiding spot - The cold was starting to be painful on your skin but you refused to go back in - Before you knew it you had passed out, deleting any memory of what was to happen afterwards - Upon waking up, you found yourself in your room, changed in a new set of clothes and void of the chill you were suffering from before you lost consciousness - It didn’t take you long to notice your mother sitting in a chair next to the bed, struggling not to drift of to sleep, her face looking like she had aged about ten years in the span of a few hours out of worry   - “Mom?” You spoke up weakly, startling the woman who was on her feet and crouching down closer to you within a second - “Y/N, darling, why’d you do that? You had me worried sick.” Alcina said, her hand gently caressing your hair, none of that sternness she was known for left in her - “I’m sorry, mama. For scaring you and for the wine bottle. I didn’t mean to...” You tried saying but got choked up by your tears - “The wine be damned. Nothing is as important to me as you are sweetie.” She said, planting a soft kiss on your forehead before climbing in bed with you and wrapping her arms around you, her embrace so warm and comforting - You never doubted your mother’s love for you, but that moment only made you more sure in it and made you love her triple the amount you already loved her

Donna Beneviento

- Donna had always been generous with the amount of dolls she allowed you to have and play with - Although, the ones she gave you were not infected with her Cadou and couldn’t move or speak on their own as to not scare you - However, you were still allowed to play and talk with Angie who you were raised to see as a sister - And just like sisters, you and Angie also fought every now and then - But, this one time, she really angered you and with all the strength of a six year old that you possessed you threw her across the room - She hit a wall hard enough to loosen one of her arms and it fell off - That’s when you knew you were practically dead in trouble and ran to hide under your bed - As you were climbing up the stairs though, you could still hear Angie’s screaming and crying from downstairs and Donna could no doubt hear it as well - So as to avoid running into her, instead of hiding upstairs, you went into the basement - Where you had never been in, by the way - Meaning you had no idea what horrors awaited you there - Mannequins, doll parts, terrifying dolls which moved on their own - In your eyes it was a pure nightmare - Seeing the dolls turning their heads to follow your movement, some even raising an arm as if to greet you almost made you scream several times but you didn’t want to give away your hiding spot - And that’s when the laid out mannequin on the table, one you were already terrified of, turned it’s head to look at you, opened its eyes and mouth - The radio on the other table turned on simultaneously, all of it being too much of a scare for you to be able to suppress the scream you let out - That’s when you felt a hand on your shoulder and screamed even louder, even beginning to cry - The hand turned you around and you were suddenly facing your mom who looked scared and concerned, a little paler than usual too - You took no notice of that though, seeing as how you ran right into her, hiding your face in her hip - “I’m sorry mommy! I didn’t mean to hurt Angie! Just please don’t let them scare me anymore!” You cried, your tiny hands balled up in fists, clutching to Donna’s dress as if for dear life - The woman was relieved to see you were safe although still a little confused as to why you had even run down to the basement in the first place - And then she thought a bit more about what you had said - “Oh dear, you thought you were in trouble? Angie’s perfectly fine, Y/N. Her limbs come off loosely all the time. You didn’t even actually hurt her.“ - Seeing that your distress was showing no sign of decreasing, Donna picked you up and proceeded to carry you up to where Angie was so she could apologize for making you feel guilty in the first place

Salvatore Moreau

- Being a young kid, the Reservoir was a rather dangerous place for you to wander around in unsupervised - Usually you’d stick to the safest area, aka the one furthest away from the water, and would only be allowed to see the rest of your dad’s property with him by your side, holding your hand to make sure you wouldn’t fall - But one day, as you were sitting in at the entrance of the Reservoir, in the small body of water by your feet you saw a golden fish - Mesmerized, you foolishly ducked down to try and touch it but it, of course, swam away - Oh but you were far from prepared to let it go - So you chased after it, watching its glimmering skin rush under the surface of the water, going further into the dangerous parts of the property - You were mindless to the fact you were entering a territory that was originally forbidden to you - That is until a wooden board on the dock broke under you, causing you to fall in the water - And being only barely six years old, you didn’t know how to swim so before the panic had even worn off completely, you started screaming for help, praying your father would hear you - And boy were you in luck - A giant fish emerged from the water from underneath you, carrying you on its back to the dock you had fallen from - You scrambled to get to the safe half of it and sat on the ledge - By the time you were able to look around with clear vision instead of the blurred with tears one you had been struggling with seconds prior, the monster fish was gone - And your dad was standing on the dock next to you - “You see no why you aren’t allowed here, child?” - You nod, sniffling and running to hug him, relieved to be in your dad’s safe embrace - Despite the efforts to be stern, Moreau crumbles back to his usual loving and caring self, being the best father in the world in your eyes  - He carried you, piggy-back style back to the safe space of the Reservoir

Karl Heisenberg

- It goes without say that, growing up in a factory as dangerous as Heisenberg’s, there’s certain amount of rules you have to respect for yours and your father’s safety as well as the successfulness of his experiments - But there was no force that was able to keep you away from this one machine that looked far too interesting for you to overlook - You couldn’t help but go up to it every now and then to look at the blinking lights and the tempting colorful buttons - And then there was one day when just looking didn’t satisfy you - So you went on to press a few buttons, in the order of your favorite colors - It didn’t take long for you to realize how poor that decision was - When sparks started flying from the machine was when you finally decided to back away and that satisfying your curiosity wasn’t worth it - But it was already too late  - The whole process had stopped, the conveyer belt of murder machines pausing mid-movement suggesting the whole operation was hindered - “Y/N? What on Earth are you doing?” - Your dad’s voice had never terrified you so much - All excuses and apologies you wanted to say died down in your throat at the sight of your mildly agitated father standing behind you with an unimpressed look on his face - He wasn’t angry by any means but your vision was too blurred by tears for you to be able to see that - “Dad, I’m so sorry!” You cried, running to hug him, back turned to the malfunctioning machine you believed you damaged beyond repair - Wrapping his arms around you, he gave you a quick hug before stepping around you and approaching the machine, fixing it with the press of a few buttons - “Hope that teaches you a valuable lesson not to break the rules kid.” He said with a crooked smile, ruffling your hair while you still stared at machine in disbelief

[nafeary]

Napoleon, Theodorus, and le Comte’s Reaction to MC saying “I love you” first

Anon asked:

Hey there! I really like all the stuff on your blog, so could you do the suitors reactions to you saying I love you for the first time (like, if the route plots didn’t really happen). If all of them are too much, maybe just Napoleon, Theo and Comte. Maybe also include a little scenario? Thanks in advance.

✧✎ A/N: Heya, sweetest anon! Thank you so much for this request (and for including three of the daddy line), this was really fun to do~

Theo’s got... slightly longer than the others (almost a whole scenario by itself whoops). Don’t worry Napoleon. I have a WIP of yours. Thanks @juminly and @delicateikemenmemes for helping me out with Theo, and @marie-quentin for giving me a quick crash course in French. Drink water, y’all :))))

Warnings: slight suggestiveness, and implied sexual activities.

Napoleon Bonaparte

Pardon? Could you run that by him again?

It had been a morning like any other, welcoming the culprit who’d come to wake him up with his wonted kisses

However, this time around, he hadn’t met an interfering hand—which was by far his favored option. The other ones entailed pillows, fists, and even a certain someone’s foil

So when he met lips, molding together with his like a familiar imprint, he immediately shook off his fatigue, surprised to see his lover before him

His astonishment didn’t stem from the kiss itself (as you’ve done way more than just that), but you’ve never indulged in his habit before

Not only that, but it felt so much more...

Intimate. Passionate. Amorous...

Romantic. Purely romantic.

Your hands rose to his cheeks, cupping them in an ever so gentle embrace. Feeling almost weightless within your gentle expression, he sighed in the intimate comfort only one’s other half could provide.

“‘Leon?” The most idyllic melody made his eyes open, blinking a few times to adjust to the sun’s flaxen rays. He had to halt a few moments, for as his eyes managed to adjust, the golden glow hugging your form truly made you appear out of this world.

“Yes, nunuche?” Your loving and tender gaze almost made him melt, and it was a miracle that his question sounded as nonchalant as he was hoping for it to be.

“I love you.”

Napoleon couldn’t help the pounding of his heart. In all his years, no one had ever managed to make him feel so precious. Of course, he’s had his previous lovers, but as you stood before him like an angel of fortune, holding his head up in a pretense of it being the most wondrous diamond...

He couldn’t help the laughter spilling from his lips. At your affronted expression, he pulled you to his side, your cheek squished against his neck. Closing your eyes against his laughter’s shock waves—tens on the Richter scale—you couldn’t prevent the pout from conquering face.

Napoleon halted his laughter, although not completely, and his arms cocooned your midriff to lean in. Your toes curled as his lips brushed your ear.

“Je t’adore, nunuche.”

Theodorus Van Gogh

You might have to bring him to Isaac or Leonardo to fix, because you’ve completely broken this guy

He always expected to say it first, so he’s kinda mad??? But also really touched??? Fix him, please

It was no secret that Theodorus Van Gogh considered himself to be very domineering

Not because he wants the other person to feel save and protected... it was simply due to convenience pssst don’t tell him

Of course, he found it more than endearing when his girlfriend took the leash from time to time, and he genuinely enjoys her initiations of affection

Everyday, it took Theo all the self control he could muster up not to break into a smile at the sight of you, not to pick you up and whirl you around, not to throw you over his shoulder to carry you to his room...

Anyway, if you were to tell him the famous three words first, he’d be pure molasses in your hands

“Do you need more syrup, Theo?”

While the amount of liquid gold suggested the attendance of the entire mansion, it was only himself and his lover at breakfast. You had risen later than usual (due to certain nightly activities), and Sebastian was so kind as to allow you a day off.

“We’ll see,” he murmured, nevertheless thanking you when you brought him more with a disbelieving snort.

As you ate breakfast in the kitchen, not wanting to bother yourselves with setting everything up in the dining hall, he did not let your “inconspicuous” array of glances go unnoticed. Whenever he caught your eyes, you’d quickly avert your own, a faint blush dusting your skin. Perplexity marred his mind at your bashful actions.

Just when you stood up to do the dishes, he grabbed your arm, turning you around to trap you successfully underneath his form. Bewildered, you squirmed in his grasp, but that only made him pin your wrists in place. While this might not be your first time in this particular position, you could still only huff at his stern expression. “What did I do now? Do you always have to—“

“Quit your yapping, Hondje. Is there something on my face, or why do you keep on staring at me?” he spoke, as blunt and stoic as ever.

You chastised yourself— should have been aware that nothing could escape his detail-oriented eyes. Nonetheless, there was something... disparate about this morning: the hushed words of devotion, the warmth of nonchalant pecks—dare you say, it was almost domestic. It caused feelings of joy and felicity to ignite in your chest, and a certain sentence to cross your mind.

“...I love you, Theo.”

It was apparent that he’d been caught off-guard, a hand flying up to cover a short fit of coughing. And as his grip on you faltered, you flung your arms around his neck, urged by both embarrassment and closure.

“Y—you. Gadver...”

“Have I rendered the great Theodorus Van Gogh speechless?” You couldn’t help the teasing remark; eager to see his flushed expression, you peeled yourself out of the embrace. However, just as swift as he had faltered, his iron grip on you toughened once again, this time around closing the proximity to an intimate distance.

“Have you finally lost what little sense you had before?” His tone’s giddiness betrayed the harshness of his words, despite his best attempts to suppress that. As you tried to focus on anything apart from his breath caressing your neck, you espied the brilliant blush raging on his cheeks.

Deciding not to comment on his obvious joy, you pressed a kiss to his collarbone. “Don’t you have to punish me, then? I wouldn’t want to steal your thunder.”

When you pulled back to look at you love, you were met with his wild cerulean orbs. You’ve heard of people comparing them to ice, but you likened them to the tropic’s water; it might look trifling at most, but once you dive in, it would tell tales of colourful facets. Just like a big misunderstanding, crying out to be revealed.

You couldn’t care less that you were in the kitchen, that anyone could walk in on you, as he pulled you closer to himself, your legs finding their way around his waist.

Comte de Saint-Germain

He’d definitely be shocked at first, widening his eyes at your forthcoming admittance

After all, these three words might seem minuscule to a lot, but they held enough power to truly cement a relationship

Whenever he looked at his chérie, he felt the need to tell them to you 24/7, but he reconsidered that it was only right to give you more time to grow accustomed to him (and his period)

After a few months of living together, and a solitary trip back to the past (which proved itself vain as his offer was declined once again), he resolved to tell her these fateful words

He heard his amour before he saw her, the sound of your steps hurrying down the staircase growing more and more pronounced. Ere he was able to turn around to greet you, you practically pounched onto him, fingers clasping by his waist as you embraced him from behind. You squeezed his middle section gently in an effort to breathe in his scent.

Shock subsiding, he enbosomed your hands with his own, having missed your warmth—your devotion—as it crowned him with more than the sun could ever wish to.

“I have something—“

“—to tell you.”

Both of you spoke up at the same time, prompting you to smile in delight. Hearing composed, albeit joyful, laughter spilling from your lover’s lips, followed by the incessant remark of ladies-first, you uttered the words you have been longing to say, “I love you.”

The gentle rising of his torso came to a sudden halt, and he twisted around to face you. He might not have been gone for too long, but you’d missed each other regardless.

You knew the feeling was mutual as his golden eyes burned with desire, his walls coming down bit by bit, exposing a rare sight of the count’s vulnerability. With his hands inching just above your lower hip, the not so innocent innuendo of their barely proper distance to your butt was duly noted.

“I’ve been hoping to tell you these words myself, ma moitié.” His mouth traced the shell of your ear, and you felt him smile against your skin—as gentle as flower petals, yet just as seductive. “Perhaps we could arrange my reciprocation in private?”

Tag list: @juminly, @kisara-16 (I totally forgot that you asked me to be tagged quite a while ago... I’m sorry (*´Д｀*))

[silverflame2724]

Within the 13 years since WWX's death, JC begun to have wet dreams of him. As the days go by, the dreams escalate instead of stopping. It was then JC had realized he had fallen in love with WWX. WWX returns and chooses to be with LWJ over him, unaware of the fact that JC is in love with him.

It's up to you if you want this prompt to have a happy or sad ending

Unfortunately, I’m not feeling a happy ending So sad ending! Or rather, bittersweet ending!

Also, due to the nature of this prompt it’s a little NSFW at the beginning, so be warned!!

_____________

Despite Jiang Cheng’s status as a very much single man, it is not like he doesn’t have desires. He very much took care of any arousal even he had been a little to exhausted and distracted to pay attention these days. 

Tonight was one such night he had all to himself so he decided to take himself in hand and use his imagination to try and get himself off. Normally, he would imagine a woman with not quite a defined face doing the things he saw in spring books but tonight.....was different somehow. 

The scene started off normally enough but as he was nearing his climax, Wei Wuxian’s face turned up for some reason, calling his name and the next thing he knew, Jiang Cheng had spilled over his fist.

His exhausted mind had a moment to think, What the fuck? before he promptly passed out. Contrary to what he might think though, the erotic image of Wei Wuxian did not disappear from his mind.

He couldn’t the amount of times Wei Wuxian appeared in his dreams and he couldn’t help but fantasize about fucking him. More than once, Jiang Cheng had dreamed of marching to the Burial Mounds and taking Wei Wuxian home, protests be damned and screwing him into his bed until he protests no more. Sometimes, Jiang Cheng would have sweet, domestic dreams of Wei Wuxian helping him run the sect, perhaps finding a talisman to allow him to get pregnant, taking care of their children and of course, sex.

Weeks passed by in a similar fashion and Jiang Cheng takes a moment to think about why he’s having these thoughts now. The he comes to the realization that he’s in love with Wei Wuxian. That he loved him, was jealous of him paying attention others than him and caring more for others that weren’t him. But Wei Wuxian had only loved Jiang Cheng as a brother so Jiang Cheng felt like he had no choice but to love him as a brother as well.

But now.....Wei Wuxian was gone and those suppressed feelings started releasing from him like a damn, haunting him in his dreams.

.............

The dreams progressed for years on end until Jiang Cheng had a thought one day: Next time I find him.......I won’t ever let him go again.

In his mind, he cooked up a fantasy that he’ll take Wei Wuxian back with him when he returns - because he will return. Wei Wuxian will always find a way - and Wei Wuxian will be safe and happy with him.

..............................

The reality is a stark difference thirteen years later as Jiang Cheng watches who he knows is Wei Wuxian get taken away by Lan Wangji. And how dare Lan Wangji do that?! Wei Wuxian is his!

His next chance to bring Wei Wuxian back home comes soon. When he sees Wei Wuxian help out Jin Ling, their nephew, and take the curse onto his own body, Jiang Cheng knows he needs to help solve that curse. But first, he needs to capture Wei Wuxian.

When he succeeds in this, he’s a little offput by the fear and apprehension in Wei Wuxian’s gaze.

I just have to explain my intentions. Jiang Cheng thinks. But Wei Wuxian doesn’t seem to understand Jiang Cheng as he did before and that makes Jiang Cheng angry at that. His fantasies never prepared him for this possibility!

He’s at a loss as to what to do until Jin Ling says he saw Wen Ning. If I bring Wen Ning to Wei Wuxian, maybe he’ll understand that I don’t mean him harm? With this in mind and ignoring his anger at Wen Ning’s involvement in Jin Zixuan’s death, he goes out to look for Wen Ning, only find no one.

Jin Ling tricked him!

Jiang Cheng rushes back to the inn, only to find Wei Wuxian gone.

.................................

He doesn’t see Wei Wuxian again despite his best efforts. Not until the Discussion Conference at Koi Tower. But there’s no chance to take Wei Wuxian with him and Jiang Cheng is helpless but to watch Jin Ling stab Wei Wuxian through. 

He wants to rush over and take Wei Wuxian with him but Lan Wangji has already whisked him away. Jiang Cheng curses his luck.

.

.

.

The next time he sees Wei Wuxian, it’s at Burial Mounds and Jiang Cheng watches the resigned sadness in Wei Wuxian’s eyes as Jiang Cheng stands with the others. he wants to scream out differently. That no! He’s different now! But the words are stuck in his throat.

....

Truths are revealed and Jiang Cheng watches Wei Wuxian sacrifice himself for the sake of others who are unworthy of that. They return to Lotus Pier after that and as much as Jiang Cheng is happy to see him there, Wei Wuxian sticks to Lan Wangji’s side, much to his annoyance.

More truths and lies are set down but Jiang Cheng’s attention is on Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji who wander the market and explore all the trees. Jiang Cheng seethes with envy at Wei Wuxian’s soft expression. 

Then. Then they happen upon one specific tree. The one which caused Jiang Cheng to promise to protect Wei Wuxian from all dogs. He watches Wei Wuxian fall and wants to catch him.

But Lan Wangji does it instead, embracing Wei Wuxian tightly.

And. Jiang Cheng sees the softness on Lan Wangji’s face and thinks: Oh. Lan Wangji is in love with Wei Wuxian.

The two of them go to the ancestral hall next and Jiang Cheng sees them bow, sees the love on Wei Wuxian’s face and just. snaps. 

Everything is blur until Wen Ning appears, confessing the truth of his core. And Jiang Cheng feels like crying. Because Wei Wuxian had loved him all this time and he.....he threw it all away.

....................................

Later.......much later, Jiang Cheng watches Wei Wuxian leaving the Guanyin temple with Lan Wangji, their hands clasped tightly together. And he hopes that Lan Wangji will make Wei Wuxian happy. 

The way Jiang Cheng had never done. 

_______________________

Hmm, not too sure if this is a good way to end it, but oh well! Hope you enjoyed it!

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Victor’s Colours of Rain Date (Eng Translation)

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

This date is dedicated to anyone who’s had a tough and tiring week in school or at work 🥰

The date begins with MC heading to the office at the ungodly hour of 6am, right after landing at the airport.

She’s tired but has to sit through a sudden and lengthy meeting with Yuelai Entertainment (“Yuelai”).

Yuelai is a reputable company which suddenly changed its mind regarding establishing a long-term partnership with MC’s company.

The representative from Yuelai bears bad news, saying that a partnership is unlikely due to budget constraints. MC asks for another chance to redo the proposal, but Yuelai gives her a vague response and leaves.

MC feels downcast because her staff members have been working very hard on the proposal, and all their efforts seem to have gone to waste. Anna tells her to rest, but MC wants to create a new proposal to change Yuelai’s mind.

She heads to Victor’s office later in the morning to present her weekly report. She starts dozing off.

A fountain pen taps my forehead. My eyes snap open in shock, and I am faced with an expressionless Victor.

Victor: Don’t get distracted during the meeting.

MC: Only the two of us are here…

I mutter under my breath, letting out a yawn.

Victor: Stayed up late again?

MC: I had a late flight, so I spent most of the night in the airport. And there was a sudden meeting at the office this morning…

I rub my tired eyes, feeling dejected as I recall the bad news from this morning.

Victor stops flipping through the material in his hands, raising his head to look at me.

Victor: Have you been feeling tired recently?

MC: Not really.

I deny instantly. Victor pauses, frowning slightly.

Victor: Just look at your eyebags. Even the pandas in the zoo recognize you as their relative.

MC: It’s just that everything is packed together so I’m busier than usual. I’ll be fine after getting through this period!

Victor: You’re really doing fine?

I nod without hesitation.

MC: Mm, I can handle it!

Goldman showed me Victor’s schedule for these two weeks, and the extent that it is filled to the brim is shocking. Compared to him, my workload is not worth mentioning.

Victor: Do you have any work this afternoon?

MC: Why do you ask?

Victor: I’ve read through your proposal and there aren’t any big issues. Go back and get a good rest. You’re not allowed to stay up late over the next few days.

I pause for a moment, look at the pile of work on Victor’s desk, and take out my laptop.

MC: I’ll stay here with you. Being able to stay with you is my best form of relaxation.

Victor: …up to you.

Victor lets out a sigh, a smile slipping onto his face.

Victor: How’s the deal with Yuelai Entertainment?

MC: This… I’m still not sure about their final decision.

I avert my eyes, even more determined to create a perfect proposal for Yuelai Entertainment.

MC is just about to ask Victor for advice when she receives a call. She has to return to the office to deal with a difficult guest on their talk show.

After that, MC finds one of her staff crying from stress

Thinking of how to comfort her, MC recalls the many trials she faced since Ch 1 of the main storyline, and how she plowed through them all

After that:

I finally have a short break and I rub my sore temples, the fatigue built up over the past few days overwhelming me.

The weather is fine and the leaves are swaying in the breeze. I stare at the clouds and find myself suddenly missing Victor. The time spent with him this morning was probably the only time I felt relaxed in days.

Someone from Yuelai calls MC. While MC’s company crafted a very unique proposal, Yuelai sees no future in having a long-term partnership with a small company like MC’s. Yuelai hangs up on her before she can even negotiate.

Depressed, she decides to walk home because the next bus would only arrive in an hour. To make things worse, it suddenly starts pouring.

The rain is so heavy that the bag she uses to cover her head slips out of her hands, her items falling all over the ground. Her neatly arranged documents get drenched too.

I want to escape from the spotlight. I don’t want to face tomorrow. I want to find an empty corner and just burst into tears. 

The phone lying in the water vibrates, signaling an incoming call. I rub my swollen eyes and reach for my drenched phone.

MC: Hello?

Victor: Where are you?

My voice is lodged in my throat. It never crossed my mind that Victor would call me at this very moment. I take a deep breath and pretend to answer in a relaxed manner. I didn’t want him to hear that I was about to cry.

MC: Why are you calling me at this time? I’ll be home soon, what about you?

Victor: …I see you.

MC: What did you say?

Victor: Turn around.

I follow what he says and am met with blinding headlights.

The car stops. Someone steps out of the car, opens an umbrella, and walks towards me.

Under the amber streetlights, his silhouette becomes clearer in the rain.

I stare dazedly at Victor, thinking that I’m hallucinating. The tears I had been suppressing threaten to overflow.

Victor frowns and looks at me, letting out a sigh.

Victor: How long do you want to stay in the rain? Come here.

I rub my eyes. Not caring how embarrassing I look, I rush into his arms.

The feeling of acid that has been accumulating in my heart finally escape. I bury my head in his chest and burst into tears.

The umbrella is tossed aside. He places his outercoat over me, and the residual warmth disperses the cold.

Victor: You’re crying so badly. Seems like you’ve suffered a lot.

MC: I’ve already worked so hard… I’ve tried everything… I don’t know what to do… so that I can be even better…

I speak and pause through my tears. Victor pats my back gently, his actions slow and tender.

Victor: I know. You’ve already done very well. I can see that.

His voice is impossibly gentle in the gradually lightening rain.

After some time, the rain finally stops.

I look up at him with my reddened eyes. The Victor standing in front of me still doesn’t seem real.

Water droplets from the trees above pelt onto his shoulder. Even the front of his shirt has a large patch from absorbing my tears.

MC: This isn’t a dream right… you… why are you here?

Victor doesn’t answer. He gently wipes a tearstain off my face.

Victor: To fetch a dummy home.

In the car, MC realizes that she has lost her house keys in the rain so she’s unable to return home.

Victor: We’re heading to my home anyway.

MC: Y-your home?

I suddenly think about the sight of me sobbing my heart out earlier.

MC: Victor…

Victor: What is it?

MC: Can you forget about my whole bawling incident just now?

Victor: Don’t worry, I’ll get my outercoat sent to the dry cleaners tomorrow.

MC: …

Victor: What happened today?

Faced with this sudden question, I don’t know where to begin. Maybe it was the sudden meeting with Yuelai Entertainment this morning, maybe it was dealing with the difficult guest, maybe it was the heavy rain…

Maybe the culmination of all these things left me helpless and made it clear that I am not as strong as I thought.

MC: I realized that I’m not as capable as I thought… the more ambitious I am, the more helpless and small I feel when met with failure… I feel like a good-for-nothing…

Victor: You really are stupid.

MC: Why are we on the topic of my stupidity again.

I mutter softly, but turn to look at him curiously.

MC: You look like you’ve never lost control of your emotions before.

Victor: I have.

In the tranquil evening, his voice becomes quieter.

Victor: I’m no different from you. There are many things I cannot do or force to make happen. It’s okay to not be strong, it’s okay to not do well. You don’t have to bottle up your emotions.

I stare at his side profile, recalling what he had once said to me—

Victor is also an ordinary person.

[Note] She’s making reference to Victor’s Understanding the Human World date

Victor: I won’t tell you to keep holding on no matter what difficulties you face. That isn’t realistic. There will come a time when you will become an even better version of yourself who will have enough courage and experience to deal with all of this.

I suddenly have a realisation.

MC: You are an ordinary Victor, I am a mediocre MC. Everyone will definitely experience joys and sorrows in life. It’s just that people have different thresholds of endurance.

He laughs lightly, not denying my words.

Under the gentle streetlights, he pauses. It is as though an inordinate amount of time passes before his voice reaches my ears, but every word is crystal clear.

Victor: But before that, I hope you can learn to rely on me. At least with me, you always have the right to be vulnerable.

After they reach Victor’s house, he towels her hair dry and covers her with a quilt. Victor prepares to take a shower and asks MC to get him a change of clothes. 

When MC enters the bathroom, Victor is in a state of undress – his shirt is half-open and his tie hangs loosely off his neck.

MC places the clean clothes down, but slips on her way out because - I kid you not - she keeps thinking about how she can see Victor’s abs through his shirt lol

Victor: Be careful!

Victor’s warning comes too late. I lose control of my body, falling against Victor. I hear a pain-filled groan from behind me.

Feeling something warm, I have a bad feeling as I lift up my head.

Under the bright lights, Victor pushes himself off the ground with his palm, leaning his back against the white tiles. His fringe is messy, beads of water on the tips of his hair.

His wet, half-translucent shirt sticks to his skin, revealing a sculpted abdomen that is usually covered and hidden.

The shower hose is at the side, and the sound of water continues to resound.

My line of sight trails from his leg upwards and finally settle on his handsome face. I feel slightly dazed.

Victor: Seen enough?

MC: No…

I bite my tongue before the words leave my mouth, trembling as I remove the hand that is still on his chest.

MC: One misfortune after another, haha…

Victor: Stand up. How long do you intend to sit on the floor?

Victor stands first before pulling me up. He then retrieves a towel to wipe off the water droplets on me.

Victor: There really isn’t a single moment when I don’t have to worry.

After this, MC chills on the sofa in the living room and looks around.

She sees her proposal on the table. Wondering what criticisms Victor has in store for her, she decides to flip through it:

Unexpectedly, every page is filled with more comments than usual.

“Not bad”

“There’s some improvement”

“Worthy of commendation”

Not only are there praises that I don’t normally see, but there are also extremely detailed examples and analysis.

A CEO who has a thousand things to do each day is so detailed and meticulous?

I can’t help but let out silly laughter, my fingers trembling lightly. I gently touch the handwriting that belongs to him.

In my most fatigued and embarrassing moment, Victor was the one who came to me with a hug.

He is the only island that I, a little boat which has drifted off course, can rely on.

Victor: Why haven’t you gone to sleep?

MC: …I can’t sleep. I was waiting for you.

Victor has stepped out of the bathroom and is now standing behind me.

He wipes his damp hair with a towel, water vapour faintly surrounding him. He looks at me, his line of sight following my actions to the proposal on the table. He looks surprised.

MC: I promise I’m not working. I was just looking around… and saw this.

I nod towards the red-coloured comments and cast him a smile that says: “I understand everything”.

Victor: I was just curious to see whether a silly technique of encouragement would be beneficial to you.

I’m not surprised that he isn’t speaking from the heart…

MC: It’s not silly at all, and it’s extremely effective! I recommend that you use it very often!

He ignores my teasing, walks around the sofa, and sits beside me.

I look at Victor, whose profile has been caged in a halo. Only the sounds of our breathing echo in the quiet air.

Victor: Your eyes are still swollen.

I subconsciously touch my eyelids.

MC: D-does it look ugly?

Victor: Mm, very ugly.

There is a smile in his voice.

MC: …then stop looking!

I lower my head dispiritedly, pulling the quilt over my head.

Victor: You dummy.

He looks even more deeply into my eyes. The breathing that falls on my ear is very gentle, very steady, and very long.

Victor: From now onwards, I’m the only one who can see your crying face.

💧

Phone Calls: First // Second

[fuckthefireflys]

𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓

SUMMARY: there’s a knock at the door, you think it’s your boyfriend back from panama, but to your suprise you see your father, and he doesn’t have good news

SONG RECOMMENDATION: all i want by kodaline

CHARACTERS: mainly reader x father!sully, mentions of sam, nate and rafe.

WORD COUNT: 1370 words

WARNINGS: swearing, death, emotional, spoilers for uncharted 4.

A/N: please excuse any spelling or grammar mistakes, i am dyslexic as fuck lol. also the italic paragraphs are the letter

﹋ ﹋ ﹋ ﹋

You stared down at your phone, debating on whether or not to call your boyfriend for a seventh time in the past fifty minutes. He was in Panama, with his brother and Rafe, trying to find get into an old jail tower that once held Henry Avery, hoping to find something that would help navigate Averys treasure. You were in on the plan too, but seeing as it was a highly dangerous all male prison, the boys decided it was best you stay home.

Thoughts started spilling into your brain, the bad outweighing the good. You ran your hands through your hair, your leg bouncing up and down as you sat on the couch. The apartment grew darker as the sun went down, the main source of light being from your phone, which was now calling once more, only to hear Sam’s voicemail.

17 missed calls and 21 unread text messages.

You stood up, pacing around the coffee table, hugging Sam’s shirt close to your body and glancing out the window, seeing darkness filling the sky. All you wanted was to have him home.

A knock at the door startled you and dragged you out of your thoughts. You let out a sigh of relief, heading towards the door ready to either hug Sam or shout at him for worrying you so much. You took a deep breathe before opening the door, a small smile creeping on your face, ready to see your boyfriend.

However, your smile dropped when you saw your father there instead. It’s not that you weren’t happy to see him, you were always happy to see him, but right now you just wanted Sam.

“Hey, kid.”

He stood there, a sad smile on his face, which he tried to hide, but failed miserably to do. He tried to avoid eye contact with you, either looking at your face or down at the letter he held tightly in his hands. Something was wrong.

“Hi, Dad, come in. Hey, have you heard from Sam? Or even Nate? He should’ve been out ages ago but I can’t seem to get a hold of him.”

Sully sighed in defeat, dread filling him up. He knew he had to tell you and he knew he had to be the one to do it, but he didn’t know how. He didn’t want to tell his little girl that her boyfriend was dead.

“That’s, uh, that’s why I’m here. Listen Y/N...”

You watched your dad hesitate and stumble over his words, trying to find the right thing to say. As you watched him, you became more and more scared, waiting for him to say what he needed to. Deep down, you knew exactly what he was going to say, but you tried to bury that negativity down.

“Dad. Where is Sam?”

Your eyes grew watery, as sadness took over your fathers face, his emotions pretty much confirming your thoughts. You tried to suppress the tears that threatened to spill out of your eyes, but they won, slowly falling down. Your words began to stutter and stumble.

“Dad...where..where is he? Please.”

“He, uh... Sam he’s..”

“Dad, you need to tell me. You need to say it. Please. I need to hear you say it.”

He looked at the letter once again, gripping it tightly, before looking up at you. His heart broke as he watched you slowly begin to crumble.

“Sam died, Y/N. He got shot as they tried to escape the prison. I’m sorry.”

You stood there, sorrow filling your body. Your Sam was dead.

“Fuck.... How? The plan was simple, they just.. he.. Vargos was suppose to let them go.. I dont understand..”

Sully took a step closer to you, tears now falling from his eyes.

“I know, kid. Nate didn’t tell me many details, but from what I could gather, Rafe got pissed, messed the whole plan up.”

“Oh, of course. Of course it was Rafe. I swear to God when I see him I’m gonna fucking kill him!”

Your father now stood in front of you, placing his hands around your arms.

“No you won’t you-“

“He got Sam killed! He got my Sam....is he really gone?”

“I’m sorry, sweetie.”

You let out a sob, falling into your dad, feeling his arms wrap around you, another stroking your hair in an effort to comfort you, though he knew no amount of comfort would calm you down. He mumbled “sorrys” and “it’s gonna be okay”, though you didn’t pay any attention.

All you could think about was Sam.

It was now around 3 AM, you sat curled up on the sofa, holding Sam’s shirt tightly to you, Sully hadn’t left your side since. Your eyes hurt from all the crying, your nose was red and your cheeks were puffy. You had calmed down slightly, mostly from exhaustion.

A yawn was heard from your dad, making you look at the time, suddenly feeling bad that you had kept your father here for so long.

“You, uh. You should go home. Get some sleep.”

“No. No way, I’m not leaving you.”

“Dad, it’s fine. You need to sleep. Besides, I kind of want to be alone right now.”

“Are you sure?”

You nodded, shooting him a hint of a smile, he shot one back, hesitantly getting up and walking over to you, planting a small kiss to your head.

“It’s going to be okay. Not yet, but eventually.”

He placed the letter he had been holding on the couch next to you, before grabbing his coat.

“What’s this?”

“Oh, uh, Sam gave it to me when you two first got together, said to give it to you if anything ever happened to him.”

“Oh.”, was all you could say, picking up the letter, taking a deep breathe before opening it. You heard the front door close, leaving you alone in the dimly lit apartment. Your eyes closed for a brief second as you unfolded the paper, immediately teary as you saw your boyfriends writing.

Dear Y/N,

If you’re reading this, then I’m sorry. I’m most likely dead, or maybe kidnapped by pirates, hopefully it’s the second one. It was bound to happen some day, you know what I’m like, always getting myself into shit. And I know what you’re like, always saving me from said shit. And I know you’re probably sitting at home, right now, reading this, blaming yourself. Whatever happened, it’s wasn’t your fault. Okay? None of it.

There was just a few things I wanted you to know, that I’ve never really told you. You know I’m not good at talking, but hopefully I can write it. You are the love of my life. Simple as that. From the moment we first met, I knew I was going to fall in love with you, and honestly it terrified me. But you made every single second worth it. You are literally the most amazing thing to happen to me and at times, you were the only one that kept me going. I wish I would’ve told you that more, shown you more, cause I really do love you. More than anything.

I want you to be happy. I don’t want you to spend the rest of your life mourning over me and being sad. You deserve to be happy. So I want you to know it’s okay to move on, though be warned I will come and haunt the shit out of both of you. I’m gonna miss you.

I’ll be waiting for you on the other side. I love you so fucking much.

Your Sam

P,S. look after nate, make sure he doesn’t get himself killed too

Despite the tears streaming down your cheeks, you chuckled. Sam always knew how to make you laugh, even in the worst of times, that was one of the reasons you loved him so much.

You read the letter over and over again, crying more and more each time until you couldn’t any more. You loved Sam more than anything, and now he was gone. And even with his ‘permission’ you knew you would never be able to move on.

You would never be able to love anyone more than you loved Samuel Drake.

A/N: i’m thinking of writing another imagine like this one, where the reader is in love with sam and instead of sully giving her the letter nate does, and it’s actually Sams love confession to the reader and i could do a part 2 where they reunite and talk about the letter. let me know what you think!

[timextoxhajima]

Grounded: Level 3

Level 2 | Level 4

Member: Minho (Lee Know)

Genre: idol minho x idol trainee reader

Taglist: @jaehyvnsvalentine​​ @licorice526 @lolwhatameme @felixn-recs​​

[D E C E M B E R 2 0 1 8]

“Do you need me to g-”

“No, please stay.”

Yeonjun turns to look at you, eyebrows furrowing because he can hear the fear in your voice. By now, he’s probably figured out how one-sided you’re feeling about your friendship with Minho. He knows you’re suppressing a backhanded anger for Minho - as much as you’re aware he cannot consistently keep up with your life, it wouldn’t have been difficult for him to drop you a text every now and then. 

“Are you sure?” Yeonjun looks up at the person you’re staring at, the distance slowly shrinking as Minho makes up his mind to walk towards the two of you. “I don’t want to be interrupting something important.”

“But he’s not the one who’s been helping me in a time I really need someone,” The thought being verbalised after such a long time leaves a disgusting linger on your tongue. 

“Wait, y/n, what does that mean-”

“It means I want him to choose.”

Yeonjun’s frown is now deeper into his forehead. Minho is about twenty metres from you. 

“Choose? You can’t expect him to choose between you and his career-”

“Why can’t I?” You are just a few notes lower than actually shouting. He’s about ten metres away now. “It’s been a year and it’s like he doesn’t remember I exist anymore.”

Yeonjun’s dark orbs are faltering as Minho closes in. Then he chooses to say something that deals a last blow to your logic. 

“If he’s forgotten about your existence then he wouldn’t be walking here right now.”

The whiplash in your neck shoots bolts into your skull when you suddenly turn to Yeonjun, your breathing becoming labored as Minho stops just about a metre away from you. 

“Can we talk?”

The way his voice manages to overwhelm the noise from the crowd is stunning. Then again, you haven’t heard him actually speak to you in about a year; it makes your heart want to stick itself through your chest like the Alien. 

“I’m surprised you’re even allowed to walk around in public without bodyguards.”

From the corner of your eye, you note Yeonjun turning his head away in slight frustration or disapproval. Minho shuts his eyes for a moment, like he’s guilty and he’s mustering up the courage to continue. 

“Contrary to popular belief, Stray Kids has a long way to go.”

The awkwardness in the air stings your nerves like water through dry, cracked skin. 

“Can we please... talk? I just... I know that I haven’t been around, especially when you needed help with training.”

“There’s nothing to worry about. I have Yeonjun to help me.”

Using Yeonjun as a shield doesn’t make you feel any better though. Instead, it hurts you more when you notice the hurt that’s beginning to brew in Minho’s face, despite half his face being covered by his mask. 

“And I’m happy for you,” Minho glances at Yeonjun, whose face was slightly contorted with a mixture of frustration and disapproval. He’s going to kill you when you get back to BigHit, but not in front of a debuted idol; not in front of a crowd. “But... I just wish we could go back to the way we were-”

Minho’s voice falters, and it’s a heavy blow on your angry stance in his presence. Starting to hear your heart in your left eye socket, the eyelid starts to twitch, and you can feel your nerves beginning to pull you backwards - away from Minho. 

The conflict within you crushes you faster than you expected - if you were even prepared for it at all. 

I hate it that I was the one who pushed you for it. I hate it that I was the one who told you to keep going. I hate it that I was the one who got so happy when you finally reached your dream. I hate it that I was the one who got mad when you prioritised your career. I hate it that I was the one who understood why you did it. I hate it that I was the one who chose to press and pull and pinch this friendship until it’s hurting me. 

I hate it that it looks like it’s hurting you... more than it’s hurting me.

“I won’t be where I am without you. I wouldn’t be standing here, worried about people figuring out who I am... Had you not given me the strength to go back.”

But you’ve always been the one who’s given me strength, not me to you. 

“I just wish we had more time,” He’s shaking his head ever so slightly, eyes finally travelling down when he realises he cannot maintain his disintegrating pride. “Please... I can’t- I can’t lose you. You’re one my best friends and I just... I can’t meet up with you as often as I do with my male friends because we’d both be screwed by the public-”

“And so... You forget that texting is a thing? Calling, maybe?”

Yeonjun sucks in a deep breath and intervenes, unable to contain his discontent with the way the conversation was developing. “y/n, he’s busy. He’s got a bunch of schedules to handle when he’s not vlogging his own private life. Give him a break.”

“A break?” It hurts on your heart because you were no longer sure where this anger was coming from. “Yeah, damn right he got a big break.”

“y/n!” Yeonjun snaps angrily, finally grabbing on your arm and nearly manhandling you backwards, away from Minho, like you were a feral dog. 

Minho’s eyes are set on the way Yeonjun’s staring at you, while your tear-glazed eyes are flitting from Yeonjun to your best friend - or at least, who was once your best friend. 

You don’t realise it until Yeonjun’s grip on your arm is holding you still - your arm was already trembling from the sheer amount of emotions ripping through you in the face of Minho. 

“If you have nothing better to say, then have this conversation another day. Right now, you’re being an ass and I would’ve slapped you if we were related.”

Aggressively yanking your arm out of Yeonjun’s hold, you shift backwards and glare at Minho. Angry that he’s not spared the minimum effort to reach out to you, you turn before he can see the first tear fall from your eyes. 

From afar, you can hear Minho say something to Yeonjun, but his voice is washed out by the swarming crowd as you rush through it in a bid to run back to your safe haven - right back to somewhere you’ve been emotionally condemning Minho for going to. 

How ironic. 

Once out along the streets and a safe distance away from the night market, the cold, almost-freezing air is threatening to solidify your tears on your cheeks. The bus stop is desolate, one of those stops that nobody waits at: that was how far you had run from where the night market was. 

The familiar pattern of shoes rustling and shuffling against the floor rushes nearby, then finally slows down to a stop next to you. Your gloves are stained with the tears had stained your face when you recklessly wipe them away, not bothering about how people probably already recognise you as a BigHit trainee. 

Yeonjun’s breathing calms from running after you, and you can feel his gaze tear through you, though in a different way than what Minho did.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

A sniffle clogs your nose. “No.”

“He cares, you know,” A pause. The tears run. “But what you said to him back there...”

Out of the corner of your eye, you see him look down at his feet and shake his head, his slightly tousled hair from the rushing bobbing up and down. 

“It wasn’t fair to him.”

Yeonjun’s comment weighed a billion tons your heart, for you know in the deepest crevices in your chest that it, in fact, was not fair.

A wince prowls over your face as you provide some kind of effort into hiding the sudden contortion when the need to cry overwhelms you. It takes you awhile to notice that the gleams in your eyes were no longer just the tears but also the snow that’s landing on the floor around your feet. 

Eyebrows furrowed and eyes finally clenched shut, your lips part to suck in the deepest, coldest breath you’ve ever taken. It feels like you’ve single-handedly destroyed the most important friendship in your life and there’s nothing you could do about it.

The breath exhaled is a thick, almost cotton-like cloud as your head hangs lower and lower until you feel a heavy scarf come around your neck. Yeonjun’s questionable boots come before yours as he wraps his scarf around you, gently patting you on the crown of your head.

“I know you have feelings for him. It’s the only reason why you’re reacting like this.”

In attempt to hide your frustration, you shove your hands into your pockets and clench your fists under the thick layer of the gloves. 

“But like I said before, y/n... If you’re doing this for him and not for yourself, then this isn’t an option,” He finally releases the scarf and takes a small step back. “You sign that contract and you’ll need to go through Hell just to get out of it.”

Relentless now, the tears. The snot’s that’s running down your philtrum’s staining his scarf too but- he probably can’t care less. You can’t care less. He’s seen right through you like glass and Minho- of all people- can’t see through you the same way Yeonjun does. 

The sound of cars whizzing past and people walking by was strangely comforting, albeit the storms and thunder claps in your head and heart. You’ve just flushed your friendship with Minho down the toilet bowl, and there was probably nothing that could atone for it. 

“Come on,” He starts, just loud enough for you to hear. “Let’s head back. The members are around, your trainees too- Hey, I heard the Bangtan hyungs are coming back tonight to celebrate the New Year with us.”

Great, another reminder. 

“Right,” You sniffle loudly and carelessly wipe away your mucus and tears, forcing a smile out through all that tainted happiness. “Haven’t seen them in awhile.”

Yeonjun looks back at you with eyes that know how you’re feeling, and he offers you one of his arms for you to slide under so he could protect you from all the ache in your chest.

[F E B R U A R Y 2 0 1 9]

스트레이키즈 현진 졸업식, '막내 아이엔이랑 왔어요'(Stray Kids, SOPA Graduation)

A scoff runs dry your lips, eyes travelling from the pixelated screen to the boy sitting next to you, swinging his legs childishly while sitting atop the railings. 

It’s fascinating, the way the school structured it’s pick up system. Idols or idol trainees could wait in a designated area for their respective vehicles or cars to come pick them up from the pick-up point - you were just lucky enough to know enough of these people to wait with them. 

“What?” Hyunjin whines, lips twisted downwards like those ‘colon and bracket’ sad faces. “It’s not my fault you watch so much Stray Kids’ content.”

Jeongin was fiddling with his sleeve when he finally looks up at you, and the boy decides to slap you across the face with words that you would’ve otherwise slapped him for.

“But don’t you only watch Lee Know hyung’s stuff?”

Hyunjin’s eyes dart to the younger, sucking his lips between in his teeth in a bid to hide his cheeky smirk. 

“Man’s got a point.”

“You two have a death wish.”

“Bye, Stray Kids!” You turn to see Daehwi and Woojin rushing for a black van. “Bye, y/n! I hope to see you on stage soon!”

“I’ll think about it!” Waving back aggressively, Daehwi giggles as he gets into the car after Woojin. 

Hyunjin, Jeongin and you wave at the passengers of the van as they drive off. Hyunjin was holding a bag full of bouquets whilst you were holding just two, one that Yeonjun and TXT had delivered and another from your fellow trainees. 

“You’re still thinking about that contract?”

“You make it sound like I’m thinking of buying a piece of clothing.”

“It’s just... you’ve gone so far. You’ve been training for- what? 2 years now? Stopping now would render your two years of training useless.”

“Look, I just need more time to... decide.”

Both boys turn to look at you, one obviously more aware of the situation than the other. Hyunjin’s brows are slightly furrowed when he can hear the weight in your voice.

His lips are parted just before he can say something, but a honk beeps him out of his train of thought.

“Oh! He’s here!” Jeongin hops off the railings and rushes to the side of the pavement. 

Hyunjin jumps off and turns to you first, eyes calming scanning your face that’s struggling to hide any hint of emotion.

“I think you should talk to him. He’s as upset and bothered about it as you are.”

Their pick-up stops right before Jeongin, who pulls open the door and climbs in first. 

Unable to set down your pride, you choose to look away, not noticing Hyunjin leaning into the car to get something before he climbs in himself.

“This,” He holds out a bouquet of roses and baby breaths wrapped in white and blue. 

For me?

“This is his apology. I think you have a part to play in this too.”

“Hyunjin-ah, time to go,” The manager calls out from inside, greeting you with a small wave from the drivers’ seat. Your smile is weak with the flowers in your hands, and Hyunjin gives you a gentle pat on the shoulder before he gets in the car again. 

Waving to Jeongin who was waving to you through the back window of the car, you can feel the weight of the flowers in your arm. After the car is out of sight, you look down and inspect the gift, picking out a small card with Minho’s handwriting on it. 

Happy Graduation! I hope you’re doing alright, and that you’re taking care of yourself well. I heard you’re still training at BigHit, and Yeonjun told Changbin that he’s debuting soon... which means he’s not around much to help you so, if you ever need help, you know who to look for.

Love, Minho 

Another horn blares you out of your raging calm - it’s your pick-up. Clutching the flowers tightly, there’s a growing desire to get to the point where he inspired you to work towards. 

[M A R C H 2 0 1 9]

Surprise 모두 기립 박수

Suicide squad 현실판에

Frightening Let’s get burning now

The adrenaline is rushing through you a thousand miles per hour, any more and you could probably phase through a wall or something. It looks satisfying in the mirror, probably later when you monitor your progress but right now, all you were worried about were your arm angles and how your head isn’t moving according to the be--

Click

Two familiar heads of brown locks strut into the practise room, completely not fazing your lonesome performance in the sickening room. 

“Wow, ATEEZ?” Soobin chuckles as he walks in after Yeonjun. 

“I- It’s a- It’s a good song to practise my- stamina-” This last San bit is a pain in the ass.

“But an ATEEZ song?” Yeonjun winces at you through the reflection in the mirror as he watches you thud to the floor at the end of the performance. The music comes to a halt, slightly echoing in the studio. “It’s like you’re practising for a marathon.”

 “Well,” There is an apparent struggle to catch your breath while you remain on the floor, eyes looking up at the two boys. “Let’s just say if it’s one thing I’m getting an A for tomorrow at my evaluation, it’s going to be dancing, so...”

“That sounds like you,” Soobin nudges Yeonjun as he stretches a palm out for you to take. 

“Whoa,” Strutting over to your bottle by the mirror, you pull the cap off and raise a teasing brow at Soobin. “I don’t think you can ever compare me with the top trainee of BigHit.”

Soobin giggles at Yeonjun rolling his eyes in the mirror, just short of hurling something at you before he tackles you over and messes up your sweaty hair. But TXT was so well-received in their debut, it almost hurt to believe that you could be debuting as their first sister group. 

“How are your vocals and rapping? Didn’t you say they’ll only make you do monthly evaluations after you sign the contract?” The plastic bag that you didn’t notice from before gets taken away by Soobin, and he fishes out some bottles of energy drinks and some sandwiches.

“I could be better at singing... I assume... Yeah, no- I... I asked for the monthly evaluations.”

“What?” Soobin’s eyes are adorably enlarged, twice their original size. “Are you nuts? Just what have you gotten yourself into? My God, you’re even dumber than I thought.”

“I would second that,” Yeonjun points to you after pointing to Soobin with his thumb over his shoulder. “But, it’s a great way to maintain your progress.”

Then he goes over to sit down next to Soobin near the sound system. “Got anything you need help with?”

“Uh...” Running your fingers through your greasy hair, you rest your free hand on your hip, running the songs through your head like an archive. 

“Are you performing 3 songs for each category or- You’re not singing, rapping and dancing to ATEEZ, are you?!”

“The Hell- No!” You chuckle and wave the nonsensical conclusion off. 

“Oh, thank God,” Yeonjun clutches his chest. “Else, you could probably pack up and move out of your dorms by tomorrow evening.”

“If it’s one thing I’m getting that A for, it’s dancing. So... I could get all the help I could get.”

Yeonjun strolls towards the sound system where the player was, scrolling through the list of songs that were most commonly played. 

And so, Yeonjun and Soobin watch you slide across the floor while performing an EXO song, sing a song from HONNE, and completely forgo the rap section. Soobin’s tears of laughter stained the floorboards as Yeonjun rushes after you in a bid to tackle you and ruffle your already messy hair, because how dare you forget that rapping is a thing!

When they leave for their own training, the coolness of the studio finally sinks in after another long day. Your earbuds are finally useful now, after hours and hours of nothing but loud blasting so you can deafen and annoy yourself with the same songs over and over. 

난 알고 있어도 날 볼 수가 없어

답답해 제발 딱 한 번만

The studio lights are still finding some way to seep through your lids despite them being shut, and his voice feels like you’ve been pulled through Hell just to reach Heaven. But the lyrics have etched itself into your brain like carvings into stone, and it keeps you awake at night. 

Maybe you were overthinking, feeling all his emotions in those two lines he got in that song. But you heard something, even if it was just in your head, it was something.

He looks different now. The way he’s on stage, the way his nerves shift along with the beat, the way his voice comes out louder but still quieter than his heart and the thoughts in his head. He was never one to actually vocalise his feelings until he hits his tipping point... so, it’s a new kind of sour or bitter or all the tastes you dislike that lingers on your tongue. 

Lee Minho, you are one of a kind. 

Tiredness gets the better of you when you are aware you’re slowly drifting off to sleep. Your muscles have ached to the point where you no longer feel the pain; they just feel numb. The world starts to feel lighter, even if its the tiniest bit, as the exhausting slumber claims you...

Thus, it’s a startling surprise when you are jolted out of your sleep by someone tapping on your shoulders, and you are sure your eyes are bloodshot. 

“Oh, y/n!” It’s Jung Hoseok, J-Hope of BTS. “My God, did you sleepover?!” 

“Oh- I-” You pull your phone out of your pocket, realising it’s dead. “I guess I did... What time is it?” 

Hoseok immediately helps you up to your feet when he sees you struggling to get up, hair messy and smelling disgusting, probably. “Um, it’s 11am.”

“WHAT-” Hoseok hops back in surprise when you nearly yell in his face, and you fumble around to collect your things to return to the dorms to wash up, only for you to come back and continue before you were royally screwed over by the judging panel. “11?! I have an evaluation at 2pm!” 

“Wait, y/n! Didn’t you ask for this evaluation yourself? There isn’t a need to worry if you can’t make it for an unofficial one-”

“No, but I- I worked hard for this-” Grabbing your speaker and phone and charger and earpiece and earbuds and clothes and knee guards, you can feel the stress building up like Jenga in your stomach. “I can’t not get that A for dance at least-”

Then you are one feet out of the studio before you abruptly run into someone, nearly smashing your shoulder into the unknown stranger. 

That is, until you look up in a bid to apologise out of politeness.

But then there it is again, those dark brown feline eyes. It’s like you’ll never escape them; it’s like you’d always run into them when you least expect to. 

“Minho.”

He blinks, obviously surprised.

“y/n,” He glances above your head, possibly looking at J-Hope, before looking back down at you. “Are you... okay? You look like-”

“Shit?”

Minho purses his lips, unable to contain the little smirk that surfaces in the corner of his mouth before he panics and covers the bottom half of his face. Even you weren’t sure if you were making a joke about yourself, or that you were genuinely trying to rub it in his face that your friendship was as good as gone. 

“I was... going to say exhausted. But I assume you already know that?”

Tired, you run your hand through your slightly greasy hair, your bag slung messily over your shoulder. “Yes, I’m aware. And I have an evaluation to worry about in three hours so... I gotta bolt.”

It feels like you’re trying to shift mountains, looking at him in the eye. He isn’t that much taller but there’s definitely something different about him. Not to say that he was looking down on you, but he now walks with confidence on his shoulders and pride in his heart, and no matter how much you detested him for forgetting that you existed, you were happy for him. 

But of course, you’re prideful yourself, so you choose to look down and walk away from him. 

It’s time to worry about myself. 

[the-silentium]

The Lost Future Pt. 2

Masterlist Part 3

Pairing: soulmate!Five Hargreeves x Reader

Summary: Soulmate AU where the soulmates share their wounds. || Along with your brother, you are transported into the 1960's with a bunch of kids you don't know. Turns out they are trying to stop the 2019 apocalypse and you are playing a key part of it.

Words: 3500 words

Warnings: Violence, swears, angst, fluff. FRENCH WORDS Y'all have to bear with my French Canadian ass.

A/N: Yay part 2 is out! We are almost at the best part :3 I love comments and feedback 💜 The French words are translated so no need to go on google translate and have a bad traduction. Also, I anyone want to be tagged in the next part, feel free to ask. Enjoy!

After everyone had calmed down and the two slashed hands were taken care of, the food was shared and people scattered to different places in the house and bunker. Andrew hasn't left your side until 11, asking non-stop how you were feeling and catching you up about what happened into his life while you were away. 

"So yeah. Oh and I got a puppy." You squealed in excitation. You loved dogs and puppies were the best. You already knew what breed Roo's companion was, you both had wanted one for years but you would never deny your old Mountain Bernese, Berrick, all the love and attention he deserved. 

"You got a Samoyed?" Oh how you wanted to shower this little ball of white fur in cuddles and kisses. 

"Ya. Named him Yukon. He's the happiest puppy of the world but damn! He loves mud better than his food! I swear, he starts dancing when it rains and the second we open the door, he rolls into the closest puddle of mud." You laugh wholeheartedly, the image clear in your mind. Your joy was short-lived when you caught the sight of a certain blue-eyed boy. Your soulmate. 

The thought felt weird but incredibly right. Deep inside you, a primal desire was burning for you to dive right into the newfound relationship without any back thought and see what would happen next. Unfortunately, you knew what would happen next. It was inevitable. 

So maybe you could save Five from a major heartbreak and just reject him. It would hurt every party involved, but it was the best option. You couldn't lead him on, make him love you, and then break his heart. From what you learned while being around Five today, is that he has walls around his heart. So tall. So thick. You were sure any trauma that would leave someone else broken in thousands of pieces would not even bother him. But your link with him gave you a secret passage through these defenses making you one of the few things that could hurt him. 

"Do you really want to do this to you? Deny yourself to be happy?" Damn him and his perfect reading of you. 

"You know what I'm going back to when we go back in 2019." 

"I do. That's why I say that you should enjoy it while it lasts. You deserve it." 

You scoffed at his comment. "It would be selfish. He would suffer because of me." 

Andrew sighed, he would never change your mind and he knew it. He softly patted the back of your hand before getting up. "All I say is you have your last chance." He made his way in another room, where his not so comfortable bed was waiting for him to try and sleep as much as he could before another day began. 

You harshly wiped the fresh tears for your eyes, but your throat was constricting despite your best efforts. At least, you managed to keep your sobs in, the only telltale of your predicament being the regular shakes of your body. 

You froze when you felt fingers stroking your arm in a reassuring manner. You didn't dare to breathe, in fear of letting a sob escape your lips. No one else could know.

"I'll kill him if he hurt you." Your ragged breath caused the pressure on your arm to increase slightly. You really tried to resist. You tried. But you needed the comfort. Just once. You would allow it just this once. 

"That's what brothers do. You should know that." Five hummed before moving closer. You didn't know how your body knew that Five was going to get onto your bed and sit so that your head would be on his lap, but it did. Your desire to cry came back full force when you realize how heavenly the feeling was. His hand in your hair, his fingers tracing lines on your arm, his patience when waiting for your shaking form to calm down. You felt so dirty to enjoy his presence while knowing that you were digging the grave of his happiness. 

"I'm definitely killing him." You laughed, tapping his legs in a playful manner. His chuckles sounded like music to your ears and you knew right then that you signed your fate. You needed to hear it again and maybe if you were lucky enough, you could hear his laugh before everything ended. 

"Sooo…" You turned on your back so you could try to discern his handsome features in the dark. "Why does Klaus call you old bastard? We are all born on the same day, right?" 

"Yes. But when I jumped into the apocalypse, I got stuck there for 45 years, meaning that my mind is 58 years old." The three lasts words were so low that you almost missed them. Almost. "Deal breaker?" Your bandaged hand reached for his, testing the water. 

"No. Never." You closed your eyes the second his fingers interlaced with yours. You tried to engrave this perfect moment, your first intimate time with your new-found soulmate in your memory.  

"I'm sorry." Five's whispered. His fingers were tracing the border of the bandages covering your hand. 

"For what? You didn't hurt me." You admired his hair, contemplating how soft they would feel under your fingers. 

"Yes I did. I was a hitman. I got stabbed, I barely survived an explosion, I hurt myself in the apocalypse so many times that I'm surprised I didn't die from an infection-" Your furrowed brow made him ponder. "You never got hurt because of me?" 

"Nope. Never. Did you?" He shook his head. His fingers slowed their motions on your hand, telltale of his mind working at light speed. You couldn't stop yourself this time and reached for his dark strands, combing your fingers through their softness. For a tiny second, Five tensed, stopping his ministrations simultaneously but soon relaxed and leaned into your hand. You smiled and massaged his scalp just like your mother did to you when you weren't well. "Maybe our bond couldn't link us through the timelines." He sighed before a tired smile stretched his lips. "I'm glad." 

You giggled, trying to suppress the yawn building in your throat, but failing miserably. A kiss fell on your uninjured hand followed by a stroke on the cheek. "Get some sleep." Your whine got a chuckle from him. "We'll have plenty of time after we stop the apocalypse." A last kiss landed on your forehead and Five moved to get up.  "Good night, mon âme soeur." 

You smiled at his flawless use of French. "Bonne nuit, my soulmate" 

…………………………….

Just after breakfast (read here the rest of yesterday's diner) everyone gathered in the bunker to assess yours and your brother's powers. 

"So, Roo can kinda dematerialize himself? I don't know how to explain it." The Hargreeves were all sat on couches, watching them intently. Vanya had woken up and was briefed of the recent events. 

"Just show us." Diego played with a knife, obviously bored. 

Andrew placed himself in the middle of the room while you joined Five and sit on the ground between his legs. Andrew pointed to Klaus who was fiddling with a controller. "Throw it at me." 

The surprised cough of Klaus made you giggle. His left hand went to his chest dramatically, his eyes wide. "Me? Throw an innocent controller at you?" Letting go of the act, Klaus' eyes returned to normal, a smile on his face. "Fine." 

The throw was messy and weak, hitting its target on the chest nonetheless before falling to the ground and a back piece of it broke. Your twin lifted his arms as to say "see?" He then pointed to Diego, shiny knife still in hands. "Throw it at me. Don't hold back and don't deviate." 

The room stopped breathing. "Sorry, what?" Diego was incredulous, just like everyone else, minus you. 

Confident, Andrew nodded. "You heard me. Bring it on." 

Allison and Vanya tried to dissuade their brother, clearly afraid that someone would be gravely hurt in this process. "You asked for it." You weren't surprised by the amount of force Diego put behind his throw. The knife flew at an incredible speed, passing right through Andrew leaving no hole, no blood, nothing. On the other side, the wall wasn't as lucky. 

"What?!" Diego was on his feet in a second, quickly getting to his knife to inspect it while your brother flashed a smug grin. "Things pass through you?" His eyes went from the broken controller at their feet to the weapon, trying to figure out what really happened. 

"When I want them to." Hands digging in his pants pockets, Andrew swung himself on his heels and toes. "It comes very handy in fights."

You had indeed witnessed a fight between Roo and 3 bigger tugs, the outcome hasn't surprised you, but seeing it was very impressive. He had to time his punches so his body would be fully materialized when the punch landed all the while taking care that his body was dematerialized for any punch threw at him. His power had no secret for him and he mastered it completely. Unlike you, who lacked practice. 

Andrew then sit on the floor, his eyes not leaving yours. It was your turn. You nodded. Your nervosity was making your hands shake a bit. It has been a while since you last used your power and you were scared that you would embarrass yourself in front of the perfectly trained Hargreeves. A deep breath entered your lungs before you concentrated on visualizing Roo's soul. 

You could see it neatly, a pale ivory flame softly floating within Andrew's seated form. You projected your own soul forward, reaching for the silky edges of your brother's and pushed him into the back seat. You took control of his body, slight nausea hitting you in the first seconds. You blinked quickly, adjusting to your new vessel and assessed the scene before your new eyes. 

Your real body was laid down on the floor with a panicking Five leaning over it. He slowly shook its shoulders, your name falling from his lips in an urgent tone. Allison and Vanya scurried to help him, Klaus and Diego watched seemingly paralyzed and Luther was the one to slap the back of your current head. 

"What's happening to her?" 

"I'm fine. I told you, my body just shut down when I project myself." A furious Five raised his head to meet your eyes and you suddenly felt very small despite Andrew being taller than the blue-eyed boy. 

"Y/N? It's you in Andrew's body?" You nodded, unsure of what you just got into. "You didn't tell us shit!" His harsh tone caused a lump to form in your throat, blocking almost completely your airways. You knew you'd screw something up. Andrew's soul became agitated, its pure ivory slightly turning grey on the edges. You could feel his anger at the back of your mind, his need to punch something. I don't care that this midget is your soulmate. He better watch how he talks to you. You cringed at Andrew's thoughts. 

"Sorry." You muttered. You quickly projected yourself back into your body to try and appease everyone. You pondered if leaving the room was a good idea, fleeing from the trouble you had just created and more importantly, trying to forget Five's anger directed at you. The ex-assassin was thinking ahead of you, because even before you could set up your mind, a hand caught yours keeping you in place. He helped you get into a seated position and positioned himself right behind you, encasing you with his legs on each side of yours. 

Five's muscles on your back softened only slightly. Allison stayed close by despite everyone else regaining their initial place. "Now can you explain?" You didn't want to meet their eyes in fear of what you would see, so you kept your eyes low. 

"I can project myself into someone else's body. It’s like I take the wheel of their body and they are in the backseat. They can still see and hear what’s happening and when I get out, they remember everything. They just don’t know it was me.” You paused, trying to see if you missed anything. “Oh, and I can hear their thoughts and access their memories too. That’s pretty much it.”

“So you can possess anyone?” Andrew obviously didn’t like Diego’s tone despite it being a legitimate question. 

“As far as I know, yes. But I’ve not used my power much and I would never use my power on you guys. I’m not dumb.” 

Diego lifted his hands in the air in surrender even though his face clearly showed that he didn’t believe you. Klaus' way of watching you, elbows on his knees, eyes reduced to slits, a hand under his chin, set off alarms in your head. A stupid comment was coming your way. “Sooo. How is it to have, ya know, an extra appendage?” You nearly choked on your saliva at the pretty forward inquiry and your brain went blank for a second. You should have known. It was written in the sky that Klaus would get stuck at THAT fact. 

“Seriously Klaus?” Allison wasn’t impressed. Like. At all. 

You shivered at the memory of the first time you tried your power. You didn’t know what it was at the time, so you let Andrew persuade you to try it on him. The trick was, you two were kids back then and Andrew had a very tiny bladder. To top it all, you didn’t know how to get out of his body yet. “Eeeeh. J’essaye de pas y penser? Parce que c’est inconfortable pis troublant en criss.” “I try not to think about it? Because it’s really uncomfortable and fucking disturbing.” The reboot of your brain apparently forgot to change the default language from Canadian French to English, causing a chorus of what? in the room. A very familiar laugh followed suit, annoying and embarrassing at the same time. Your only comfort was found in the shape of Five’s arms wrapping around your waist.

“How long can you last into someone else’s body?” Five’s hot breath in your ear made you shiver for a totally new reason. You would have loved it if the moment hasn’t been broken.

“That’s what she said!” You were very, very close to hit someone, them being Roo or Klaus, you had no preference. Back at home, you weren’t known for your patience, quite the opposite. Your nickname wasn’t Panda for nothing. You liked to pick fights, even if it meant some black eyes at the end of the day. You tried to get up, escape the grip keeping you on your butt, with no big results. 

“I need an answer.” The serious look on his face made you stop squirming. 

“So far? An hour? A bit more? Why?”

Five nodded, a content smile on his perfect lips. His head tilted a bit to the side and he watched you like it was the first time he ever saw you. “You can stop the apocalypse.”

Andrew’s unstoppable laugh abruptly came to an end at those words. “I’m sorry. She what now?”

…………………………….

The plan was brilliant, not that you expected anything less from Five. The only issue was that you would need to take over someone’s body for way, way longer than an hour. The only way for you to do just that was to practice. And boy, did you practice. The Hargreeves way. 

You panted, the return to your original body was brutal and spontaneous. Every muscle in your body was screaming in pain, your lungs were burning and your heart was a movement away from exploding. You laid on the couch, staying as steady as possible to appease your aching frame. If it wasn’t enough, even your mind felt on fire. The multiple jumps from body to another was getting its toll on your mind and to help your cause, the ones you possessed were instructed to fight you back as much as they could. 

The Hargreeves and Andrew rotated between themselves to be your target. Undoubtedly, Diego was against it, but after some persuasion Five’s-style, he soon joined the training and damn did he fight you whenever his turn came.  

Each day you made progress, but as soon as you hit the pillow at the end of the day, you were gone for a good 14 hours to be able to function again. On the good side, you were now able to stay in a calm host for more than a day and managed to keep a hostile one for a good 10 hours. At one point, Five had instructed you to jump from a host to another one. You had shown him the middle finger as quickly as your suffering muscles allowed you, indulging to his demands nonetheless. Jumping from a person to another was difficult to say the least. You often lose focus while transferring, catapulting yourself back into your own body or the second host would immediately put you K.O. the moment you tried to push them in the back seat. 

It was safe to say that you hated these trainings. Each time you had to remind yourself why you were doing it and in the end, you made it. It took 2 whole days, but you made it. And today you mastered it.

“You last 9 hours in Luther and 7 in Klaus. That’s more than enough.” Five appeared at your side and took your hand in his, stroking the back of it slowly. You noticed said boys exiting the room to give you both some alone time. 

“No more training?” Your hoarse voice made Five frown. He leaned over you to grab something on the coffee table and as carefully as he could, he bring the water bottle to your lips. You make a last effort to take the bottle yourself, not surprised when your hands don’t move an inch. 

“No more training. Now you need to rest.” His hands slipped under your shoulders and knees and he lifted you like you weighed nothing. You so desperately wanted to stay awake, enjoy being in his arms before the last lap to stop the apocalypse began so you fought the exhaustion as much as you could. 

"You're so beautiful." His comment just above a whisper made you hide your face in the crook of his neck in self-consciousness. You were never one to like receiving compliments, always waving them off or at least say it back. The latter would have been a good option if you weren't scared of where that led you. 

"Five?" He hummed, waiting for you to continue. "What if I screw everything up?" 

Five finally reached your attributed bed, carefully setting you down on the covers before joining you. He stayed at an acceptable distance from you, so if a certain male was to pass, there shouldn't be any blood spilled. His hand went to your waist, slowly caressing the skin exposed by your misplaced shirt. 

"You won't. We trained you for this and I know you can do it. You're my soulmate after all." His signature smirk was back on his lips. His confidence relieved some of the anxiety that was slowly expanding at the back of your mind and you started to think that maybe you could do it. You could really save the world. "What do you miss the most to do? In 2019 I mean."

You furrowed in brow, deep in thoughts. You missed doing a lot of things.

"When I was a kid, once a year my parents would take us to a drive-in movie theatre. I've not done that in a long time." Five found himself reciprocating your dreamy smile. 

"It's a date then."

"What?" 

"It's a date." He repeated. "The first thing we'll do when we get back is go to that drive-in theatre, then I thought we could go stargazing at one of my favorite place." 

It was so unexpected, tears formed into your eyes in a flash despite your best efforts at repressing them. It didn't take long for Five to notice the water rolling down your cheeks, worry tainting his sharp features. 

"Shit. Is it too soon?" 

"No." The speed of your shaking head almost made you dizzy. "I'd love to go there with you." Even the radiant smile on your face couldn't stop the flow of tears cascading from your eyes, leading Five to see them as happy tears. He smiled in return, reducing the distance between your two bodies to none as he cradled you into his chest, his face buried in your hair. 

Your mind wanted to scream at the universe. Yell for the unfairness of your predicament and for how much pain your selfishness would inevitably create. 

The events of the day got to you, your mind getting foggier and your breath steadier. As you were about to fall asleep, three little words flew to your ears, soft, almost indiscernible but pretty clear. 

"I love you."

Part 3

[anakin-danvers]

to love again

not my gif!

Anakin Skywalker x Jedi!reader

reader is fem!

Request: “I loved them more than anything in this world, and they’re dead because of me.” With Anakin Skywalker please? Your last one was *chefs kiss*

Word count: ~2.8k

Warnings: mentions of death, angst, crying, feelings of guilt. 

A/N: Sorry for the delay my dear anon! I got busy with summer classes, but I wanted to get it out by today as a little birthday present for myself (wooo happy birthday to me!). I’m glad you enjoyed the last one, and I hope you enjoy this one! As always, please let me know what you all think, your comments always make me so happy! Also, requests are open :)

—

Keep breathing. Empty your mind. Just focus on the feeling of the Force within you, around you...just breathe. In, out, in again, out again....is that...is someone walking outside?

You open your left eye. Your right eye follows suit, your concentration broken. A sigh escapes your mouth, and you give up on your futile efforts of meditating. Uncrossing your legs, you get up from the floor of your quarters. It’s late and you should be sleeping. But you aren’t. You can’t. 

Every moment your eyes close, you see them. Their faces, their fear. 

You shake your head, trying in a way to shake the thoughts from your mind. Don’t think about it. The more you think about it, the harder it is. 

The cool floor press against your feet as you walk over to the washroom. There, you turn on the faucet, putting your hands under the running water and bringing it onto your face in an attempt to clear your mind. You dry off and make your way back to your bed, sitting on the edge and taking a look at the room before you. 

As a Jedi, you were taught not to have possessions, to live a simple life, and your quarters reflected that. The room was filled with the minimum, only little parts of it showing your personality. The bags of your favorite Naboo tea by the small kitchen. Your saber on its place in the table next to your bed. Some nice rocks you had kept from your missions to distant planets. Your favorite cup gifted to you by your former master during your padawan days. The colorful, handmade blanket on your bed–

The blanket they had given you. 

You shake your head again, a useless attempt to stop the images of the destruction, of their faces, from filling your mind once again. Defeat washes over you as the realization that you won’t be sleeping anytime soon becomes clear. So instead of wasting your time trying to sleep, you slip on your night slippers, put on your usual Jedi robe, and make your way out of your quarters. You decide to leave your saber behind, this being one of the rare moments you can actually leave it behind. 

The halls of the Jedi temple are quiet. It seems everyone else is doing what you can’t: sleep. You make your way down the halls with light steps to avoid making any noise. Your feet lead you to a nearby balcony, where you hope you’ll be able to clear your mind while surrounded by the night. 

As you approach the balcony, you realize you were wrong in assuming everyone in the temple was asleep. No, you are not the only one awake. Standing there, looking up at the night sky as you’d planned on doing is no other than Anakin Skywalker. 

Your feet stop. The point of leaving your quarters was to have some time to clear your head. Could you do that with someone present?

It doesn’t hurt to try. You two could just stand there in silence. Plus, the next balcony is on the other side of the floor you are on. 

With your mind made up, you continue to walk towards the balcony, hoping to not interrupt Anakin who seems to be lost in his own train of thought. 

As you reach the opening of the balcony, Anakin turns, a curious look on his face. You smile at him, your hand coming up to give a small wave. 

“Hi Anakin. I don’t mean to intrude, I just need some air,” you say. He nods and you make your way to the other side of the balcony, putting a good amount of distance between you two to try to give him his space. 

You know Anakin as well as you know most of your Jedi colleagues, at a distance and mostly formal. The interactions between you two have been limited thus far, mainly consisting of greetings around the temple with the occasional meeting on the battlefield. However, you’ve always wanted to get to know him. Your longing to know him better soon developed into something more, something that causes you to go red in the face whenever your interactions are more than just your routine greetings. But you try to suppress the feelings; Jedi are not allowed to have attachments. 

Attachments. Funny how you know you’re not supposed to have them, yet you do. Or at least, you did. 

You close your eyes as you take a deep breath to try to calm the emotions threatening to come back to you. The night breeze grazes your face, calming you more than your quarters had. You open your eyes, looking down at the bustling city of Coruscant below you. 

“You’d think that for a city that’s so loud, nobody would be able to sleep.”

You turn to look at Anakin, where you find him looking at you, his body facing you. His face is easier to see now, and you see how tired he looks, the lack of sleep evident on his face. 

“I guess nobody can blame us for being up, then,” you say. 

The corner of Anakin’s mouth lifts up slightly, and he looks down at his hands. You take that as a sign that he’s done talking, so you move to face the night sky again. 

“Do you mind if I join you?”

You find yourself looking at him again, and he looks almost sheepish as he waits for your response. You nod, your lips tugging up to a smile of reassurance. He makes his way to stand next to you, the heat creeping its way up your face clashing with the coolness of the breeze. Soon, he’s standing next to you, not too close to invade your personal space, but close enough that it was clear you two are here together. 

“I would ask you if you’re having trouble sleeping, but I think we’ve covered that already.”

“Yeah,” you say, a small sigh escaping your lips. “It’s been a rough few nights.”

“I understand. I’m going through a rough patch myself,” Anakin says, his voice growing quieter towards the end. 

“Well, I’m sure we are both out here to clear our minds, so we should try to do that.” You turn to face him, a sudden sense of confidence running through you. You ignore the way your stomach feels as Anakin turns to face you better, the ghost of a smile playing in his lips. 

“If you have any ideas on how to achieve that, I’m all ears.”

Your eyes look at the city below you, thinking of how you two can clear your troubled minds. With the feeling of Anakin’s eyes on you, your eyes dance around the different city structures, the speeders, the life around you. Then it hits you. 

“I know what we can do.” You don’t realize how excited you sound until you see one of Anakin’s eyebrows rising, the ghost of a smile manifesting itself into the real thing. 

“We’re surrounded by so much life right now. We can clear our minds by living through them in a way, imagining what their lives might be like.” At Anakin’s continued gaze on you, your confidence begins to shake a bit. “If-if you like, of course. If not, we can just enjoy the night in silence—“ You stop the beginning of your rambling as Anakin shakes his head.

“No, no, I like your idea. Living through them.” 

And so you begin to imagine the lives of the beings all around you. You take turns in the beginning, each thinking of a name for the driver of a speeder that passes by. Soon, you are both coming up with life stories together, adding unnecessary details that bring smiles and laughs to you both. 

“He owns a loth-cat named Obi? You can be a bit more creative with your names, Anakin.” At your words, the Jedi shakes with laughter, a fully-rounded laugh that lights a warm feeling in your chest. 

“What can I say? I admire my Master very much.”

Now it’s your turn to laugh. Your hand flies to cover your mouth, the sudden laugh surprising you. It seems to surprise Anakin as well. 

“Is that so hard to believe?”

“No, it’s not that,” you rush to say while also trying to regain your breath from your laughter. “It’s just, you two always seem to bicker when together.”

A fond smile appears on Anakin’s face. “I guess it’s just the relationship we have. He’s almost like a brother to me.”

The honesty in his voice makes your laughter disappear. Instead, you find yourself smiling as well. You can see it, to be honest. Obi-Wan’s padawan years were cut short at the sudden death of his master Qui-Gon Jinn, so taking Anakin as his padawan right away meant they had to grow up together. 

“I can tell he feels the same about you.” Your words cause him to look timid for a second, his smile shy on his face. He looks at the city below him again, his face growing slightly more serious. 

“You know, for how much we’ve been told that emotions should be kept at bay, I believe my emotions are what have made me the Jedi I am today. Attachments...I know we’re supposed to reject them, but who would I be today if I did?” He shakes his head, his hands coming up to cover his face. 

He seems so vulnerable like this. It’s something you didn’t expect to be seeing when you decided to leave your quarters earlier. But here you are, and you feel almost honored that he’s showing this side of himself to you. 

“I understand, Anakin,” you say, placing a hand lightly on his arm. And maybe it’s the way the lights contrast with the night sky, or the lack of sleep you’ve had the past few days, or the way your heart seems to clench at the sight of Anakin before you, but something prompts you to keep speaking. “I...I’ve loved before.”

It was the first time you called it that. Love. You always knew that’s what you felt for them, but you were always too afraid to face the truth. Your confession makes Anakin turn to look at you. His face looks troubled but somewhat hopeful. 

“You have?” he asks, his voice just above a whisper. 

You nod, not being able to form the simple ‘yes’ you wanted to. The beating of your heart quickens as the images of their faces come to your mind once more. 

“I reconnected with family some time ago while on a mission.” It’s you who’s vulnerable now, your palms growing sweaty as you want to both stay quiet and spill everything you’ve been burying inside for the past weeks. Anakin catches on to your hesitation, moving so that he’s fully facing you, giving you his attention. 

“The mission took us to Tora, a small planet on the outer rim. It’s usually uncharted, so small that some consider it insignificant. It’s where I’m from originally. 

I was there with Master Plo Koon and the 104th. Commander Wolffe was talking to two locals, when one of them recognized me. Wolffe called me over; it turns out the woman who recognized me was my mother’s childhood friend. That’s how she knew who I was, she said I look just like my mother. Her and her husband knew my mother and father well, and they knew me. They were there when Master Windu found me all those years ago, and they were there when my parents sent me with Master Windu here to the Jedi Order. 

That night, I found my way to their home. There was this part of me that needed to know. About my parents. About what my life would’ve been if I hadn’t been Force sensitive. They indulged me in answering all my questions. They informed me that my parents had passed, my mother of an illness, my father of a machinery accident in his place of work. They comforted me as I cried.” 

At the memory, your voice wavers. You hadn’t expected the news of your parents to affect you, your memories of them distant. But it had, and they were there to comfort you through it all. 

Anakin takes hold of one of your hands, giving it a comforting squeeze. You look at him and he gives you a comforting smile, prompting you to continue. 

“We formed a bond that night. I visited any chance I could while on the mission. Even afterwards, I’d visit Tora whenever I found myself near. I was always welcome with open arms by them.  They’d have food waiting for me, and in one visit I found they’d made a blanket for me so that I could rest in between my missions.” You smile, they’re words replaying in your mind. 

“And I loved them. I know Jedi are not supposed to form attachments, are not supposed to love, but I loved them. I loved them more than anything in this world, and they’re dead because of me.”

They’d been among the casualties of a Separatist attack. The Separatists had wanted to take control of the region, thinking its lack of popularity would make for a great place to hide developments of any battle tactics against the Republic. 

Confusion falls on Anakin’s face, quickly followed by understanding. He shakes his head, his hands moving to hold your arms. 

“You can’t blame yourself, Y/N,” he says right as a few of the tears you’d been holding back make their way down your face. His hand comes up to wipe them away, the warmth of it bringing comfort to your broken heart. 

“I could have saved them, Anakin. I could have arrived sooner.”  More tears fall down your cheeks and Anakin continues to wipe them away. “I had to take their bodies out of the rubble. I keep seeing the look on their faces. The fear that was still there.”

Anakin’s arms come around you, bringing you to his chest. The embrace breaks your wall, the tears flowing freely now. His gloved hand comes up to lightly rub the back of your head. He doesn’t try to stop your crying, no, he lets you cry, lets you unbury all the emotions that have been eating at you from inside. 

Your crying slows enough that he pulls slightly back. He once again goes to wipe away the tears left on your face. 

“It’s hard, Y/N, I know. But you cannot blame yourself. You just can’t. It won’t let you sleep, it won’t let you eat, it won’t let you live. You need to be strong, for them, for their memory.” 

You nod, his words doing more for you than the sleepless nights wandering around the temple ever had. 

“Thank you for this, Anakin. I’m sorry for dumping all of this on you, it’s just been eating at me for longer than I would like to admit.”

The look of understanding returns to his face. “I get that. I lost someone very close, someone I loved, some time back. I too blamed myself, admittedly I still do. I’m working on not doing that anymore. There’s some nights I’m less successful than others, such as tonight.”

Realization hits you. The both of you had loved. And the both of you had lost those you loved. Now you two are working on it, but not alone. Not anymore. You are finding comfort, finding support in one another. 

“Anakin, I...” you stop talking, knowing there’s no words that can express what you want to convey to him. So instead you embrace him this time, your arms enveloping his waist as your face connects with his chest. He doesn’t hesitate on returning your hug, his arms circling you and his face burying itself in your shoulder. You hug him tighter, hoping you can express to him everything he needs to feel the support he’s giving you this night. 

After a few moments, the two of you pull back. 

“I cannot thank you enough for this, Anakin,” you say. He once again shakes his head, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. 

“If you need to thank anyone, thank the stars for having us walk onto the same balcony tonight.”

The warmth in your chest is sparked again, spreading until you feel warm all around. Not an uncomfortable warmth, but rather a warmth that makes you feel alive. 

You smile, a genuine smile that is mirrored on Anakin’s face. “Well then thank the stars.”

You look at one another for a bit, your smiles unfaltering, before Anakin speaks again. 

“Come now. I’ll walk you to your quarters. I think we will both be getting some much needed sleep,” Anakin says. You nod again, following him as he begins to move towards the temple. 

And as you walk side by side down the hallway to your quarters, both of your smiles still on each other’s faces, you believe that maybe, just maybe, you can love again.

[nonbinarybrainstorm]

Lemon Shots

Brainstorm and a few others decide it’s a fun idea to try flaming transfluid shots... Perceptor disapproves...

content: alcohol, handjob, cum eating, fire

“I can’t believe I’m letting this happen in my bar…” Swerve covers his heated face but leaves gaps between his fingers so he can watch everything that’s currently going down.

Trailcutter pants as Brainstorm’s hand works his spike, fingers curling to play between the ridges of his spike and the expressive yellow biolights that are flashing wildly. A bead of transfluid escapes his slit and Brainstorm dips his helm down to lap it up with a slow lick of his glossa, his optics flashing with excitement. Trailcutter grips the edge of the bar until the metal creaks under his fingers, trying not to be too loud even though he knows practically everyone’s optics are on him. Brainstorm squeezes the base of Trailcutter’s spike and he can’t keep the soft cry from escaping his intake.

“Give it to me all in one go, yeah?” Brainstorm urges with delight edging his breathy voice, clearly no less turned on by this than Trailcutter.

Trailcutter nods frantically, not trusting himself not to just moan anything he would or could say to that and shuts his optics as Brainstorm’s grip becomes tighter and movements faster. Brainstorm takes the head of Trailcutter’s spike into his mouth and sucks hard, pulling back slowly as he continues to stroke Trailcutter’s spike. Trailcutter’s optics snap back open to watch as Brainstorm’s lips slide off his spike, the faintest part of it visible through the gaps in Brainstorm’s cheeks before he pulls off with a pop. With a soft grunt, Trailcutter overloads and Brainstorm is there ready with a glass to catch all but the few drops that manage to land on his face, stroking Trailcutter through his overload until he collapses back, spent. As Trailcutter pants while slumped back onto the bar, cooling down after his overload, Brainstorm pops up back onto his pedes to accept a cloth from First Aid to wipe off the transfluid on his face and to set the glass full of bright pink transfluid on the bar in front of Swerve. Swerve stares at the viscous fluid with a bit of trepidation but prepares the cocktail anyway, pouring the dangerous-looking green engex into shot glasses. Then, he hesitates to add the final component.

Seeing this, Brainstorm sighs and picks up the glass and swirls around the transfluid casually while saying, “Come on, Swerve, why the cold pedes? It’d be a waste to not use this transfluid that Trailcutter so kindly offered us. You don’t have to drink any yourself, you know but there are those of us eager to try it.”

Off to the side, Trailcutter finishes tucking in his spike and looks away with no small amount of embarrassment and coughs awkwardly. Swerve’s optics flicker between Trailcutter and the ominous glass before him to settle on the glass before taking it from Brainstorm’s precarious hold. Rodimus stifles a snicker on one side as he patiently watches the entire scene go down. With care, Swerve pours small measures of the transfluid over a bar spoon into the five shots and sets aside the glass that still holds a reasonable amount of transfluid. Then, with a practiced hand, he sets each shot ablaze. After waiting just a moment to let it burn, Brainstorm picks up a shot to blow it out and down the engex in one go, savoring the salty-sweet tang of the engex mixed with the familiar burn of triple-filtered. First Aid is the next to try it and to Trailcutter’s great dismay, makes a show of it by licking his lips afterward and even winking at Trailcutter. More to get over with it than anything, Trailcutter takes his and downs it quickly, so quickly he coughs at the burn of the engex. Swerve bites his lip as he lifts the glass hesitantly and nervously blows out the flame before also downing it in one go before looking away with his face bright with shame mixed with other feelings that are vibrant in his field. Without hesitation, Rodimus lifts the glass pours the shot, still burning bright into his mouth and holds it there for a few moments before swallowing it down. He opens his mouth to let the built-up smoke escape past his lips in gentle curls then smirks at their dumbstruck expressions.

A tap on Brainstorm’s shoulder brings his attention away from the scene and his smile falters somewhat when faced with the abrasive, cold stare that has been practically perfected by his lab partner. Perceptor’s unimpressed expression almost dampens Brainstorm’s good mood but with effort and a significant amount of practice, he manages to not even look phased.

“Oh, hey, Percy,” Brainstorm greets him with glee, “Come to join in on the fun?”

“How in any way is this something you consider to be appropriate behavior? And in public of all places?” Perceptor snaps and Brainstorm has to suppress the urge to roll his optics.

Rodimus steps in and tries to assuage Perceptor’s feelings with a friendly, “Come on, Percy. We were just-”

He’s cut off by Perceptor’s cold gaze being shot towards him, so, Rodimus decides to put his hands up and back out of the situation altogether. Brainstorm does appreciate the effort though and with First Aid suggesting other “cocktails” to Trailcutter who stays very quiet and Swerve who is very pointedly cleaning glasses, it doesn’t look like he’d get much help otherwise. Perceptor waits for his explanation as his optics wander to the others before landing back Perceptor and a particularly devious idea comes to his mind.

“What is it, Percy?” Brainstorm coos mockingly as he puts the empty shot glass back to his lips with his optics locked with Perceptor’s, “Jealous it wasn’t yours?”

Perceptor stiffens with surprise then settles on scowling and is about to undoubtedly tell Brainstorm off but then Brainstorm is licking the dregs of the shot in a purposefully provocative way that has Perceptor speechless. Setting the shot glass aside, Brainstorm grins cheekily as Perceptor scoffs, anything he could have said dying on his glossa and Brainstorm grins cheekily with a victory on his servos, however petty and underhanded it is. Of course, never one to know when to stop playing with fire, Brainstorm leans on the bar and waves over to Swerve to catch his attention, making him flinch and almost drop the glass he’d been drying.

“Y-yeah, Brainstorm?” Swerve sets the glass aside and his optics flicker for a moment to Perceptor.

“Could you make one more of those shots?”

“Uh,” Swerve stalls and glances at Perceptor again then sighs and shrugs, “Sure, why not?”

In no time at all, Swerve puts another flaming shot in Brainstorm’s hand who offers it to Perceptor. Looking at it with open disgust, Percpetor’s glare only grows darker but Brainstorm is determined to get Perceptor to drop his guard, to dip a little into the depraved. He’s always wondered what kinds of things Perceptor would be willing to do, what it would be like to do those things with him…

“Here,” Brainstorm dangles the shot between, and with the precarious til of his hand, he realizes that maybe the engex is getting to him, “It’s all been consensual. No one’s done anything they didn’t want to do. So, try it. We’re scientists, aren’t we? It doesn’t hurt to be curious even if it verges on the side of morbidly curious.”

“Your strange fascination for the unnerving and nonsensical is not universal,” Perceptor puts firmly, holding up a hand to create a slight barrier between him and the flaming drink.

Brainstorm does roll his optics this time and sighs with no small amount of sarcasm, “Weren’t you a Wrecker? You must have seen and gotten up to things far more wild and depraved than this. Whatever happened to that Perceptor? Did he ever really exist?”

Perceptor grits his denta, going quiet and Brainstorm knows he’s struck a neurotransmitter, however small it might be and decides to really dig in his heals knowing full well that this could be one of his worse ideas. When has he ever let that stop him?

“You don’t have to drink of course,” Brainstorm sets the shot to the side and waves it all off, “but you can’t come in here and call me a degenerate when everyone knows your record.”

For a moment, everything is still and Brainstorm feels very full of himself as Perceptor stays quiet, knowing he can’t argue with Brainstorm but then Perceptor picks up the shot. Perceptor blows it out while looking Brainstorm right in the optic and pours it into his mouth. Not expecting that, Brainstorm doesn’t move, doesn’t even think to as Perceptor cups his face and kisses Brainstorm fully. Their lips mesh together and the warm burn of engex fills Brainstorm’s mouth as the drink pools out from Perceptor’s and his glossa slides past Brainstorm’s lips. He tastes the drink on Brainstorm’s glossa, holding his face firmly as he kisses the breath from Brainstorm. Brainstorm’s intake works as he drinks down the shot, intoxicated more by the taste of Perceptor than the engex itself. Then Perceptor is pulling away and Brainstorm doesn’t know what to do except hold tight onto the places on Perceptor’s frame he’d instinctively grabbed. Perceptor wipes away the trail of engex at the corner of Brainstorm’s mouth with his thumb and leans in close once more.

“The difference between you and me, Brainstorm,” Perceptor whispers so his vent brush Brainstorm’s lips, making him shiver, “is I know when to be depraved and when not to continue to procrastinate on my latest job.”

With that Perceptor, pulls away from Brainstorm and walks out of the bar, leaving a stunned Brainstorm in his wake. First Aid comes up beside him with a low whistle.

“I guess he really did have it in him, huh?”

Brainstorm nods and brings up his hand to touch his lips that still tingle with the sensation of Perceptor’s lips.

[cutiepisenpai]

Gifted part 7

Spencer Reid x F!Reader

Warnings: Angst, fluff, happier ending.

“Do I know you?” Y/N asks Spencer. “You don’t remember me?” Spencer asks in return. “I’m sorry no, should I?” A doctor walks in and gestures to Spencer. He steps out of the room taking one last look at Y/N. “I’m sorry Dr. Reid I wanted to speak to you before.” The doctor says. “She has amnesia?” Spencer phrases it as a question but he already knows the answer. “Yes she is missing time. When we asked her some questions about what she thinks happened she doesn’t remember getting shot, she actually thinks it’s nearly two years ago.” Spencer is devastated, he doesn’t know what he should do now, he feels a hand on his shoulder. “There is always the possibility that the memories will come back eventually, it has only been a few hours and she is still recovering.” The doctor says before leaving. Spencer stands there feeling lost. He knows the person he loves is in there somewhere but can he handle her not remembering  the BAU or the time they have shared or him. He takes a deep breath before walking back into the room trying his best to fake a smile. He walks in and immediately makes eye contact with her eyebrows scrunch and she squints having already come to conclusion. “You shouldn’t smile if you aren’t happy.” At her comment his face falls, disappointment apparent. “I take it that we do know each other. The doctors won't tell me anything but I can tell something is wrong. I’m missing time but the head injury is the most likely reason for that.” Y/N says pointing at the bandage on her head covering the stitches. She pokes at the bandage wincing at the feeling, Spencer reacts before he realizes what he is doing. “You should probably leave that alone.” He says grabbing her hand and pulling it away from the wound. To his surprise she doesn’t pull away simply looking confused but interested. “Um, how do we know each other?” She asks. Should he tell her the truth he ponders. “We um we work together at the BAU.” He answers. “The BAU? Why would I be at the BAU?” She questions irritation obvious in her voice. He did not understand why being at the BAU would be a bad thing, she always seemed happy at the BAU. “So we work together? Is that all?” She asked. And he just nods in response but he knows her face and he knows she isn’t convinced. A doctor came in to tell Spencer that Y/N needed to rest and if he wanted he could come back the next day to visit. He told her he would try to be back the next day if he could before he left. 

Y/N sat in the hospital room and she felt lost. The man who came to visit her earlier, there was nothing familiar about him but his presence was comforting. The nurses and doctors had all been keeping their distance only coming in to ask questions and poke at her with needles. She hadn’t even seen her mother and based on the band on her wrist she should be around here somewhere of course she could also be at home. Except that Y/N’s entire childhood consisted of her and her brother always being in the care of their nanny she had her doubts about that. So she sits here trying to remember what happened before. They told her she had been shot multiple times but that doesn’t make sense to her. In her line of work the chances of actually getting shot are slim; she is rarely in the field and in the few instances that she is, she is so always well concealed and has never had a bullet ever fly in her direction before. The BAU of course He had mentioned that she ponders how that came to be. What was the last she remembers? No one thing really stands out, was it spring, maybe sunny days warming the city. Are people picnicking in the park or are they hiding under their umbrellas and coats staying out of the rain? She truly had no idea. Y/N was tempted to go and ask the nurses for a pencil and a piece of paper so she could attempt at recreating a timeline but they had already warned her about how getting up and moving around should be limited, that even crossing the room could feel like running a mile. Would they even give her the supplies a nurse has already come in four times to tell her she needs to sleep to get some rest but that is the last thing she wants right now. Right now she needs answers. 

When Spencer was leaving the hospital he called Hotch to inform him of where he had gone, he also asked if he could have the rest of the day off not explaining why. The doctors would let Hotch know about Y/N and Hotch would tell the rest of the team. He just couldn’t will himself to go back into work right now. When he steps in his apartment he regrets being there. When he looked around he saw reminders of her everywhere. The unfinished chess game they had started, books she brought over for him to read, the blanket that sat on his couch from her apartment. She was everywhere and nowhere at all. All of the emotions he had suppressed over the weeks came rushing forward and hitting him like a massive wave. He doesn’t know how he got on the ground, sitting here back against the door tears streaming down his face. He was crying so hard he could feel his throat tighten making it hard to swallow. He thought of the way she looked at him, like he was a complete stranger because that was what he was to her now, a stranger. 

Weeks had passed but Spencer never went back to the hospital despite the entire team trying to convince him, it was just too much to bear. Y/N had declined seeing anyone else from the team she hadn’t shown back up to work either, they weren’t sure if she would ever return. Spencer’s life had become unbearable every night he laid awake kicking himself that he never went to see her. He knew that she was also adjusting to the new normal that it was. After the first week he packed her things that were at his apartment and hid them in the back of his closet but it didn’t help. He spent too many days laying in his bed unmotivated to do anything. He knew there were things he needed to be doing but he just couldn’t get up. Everything was too much he would get in the shower and just stand there as the water poured over his body, his already poor eating habits became worse only eating occasionally but even then he usually just picked at the food before him. He even tried reading but the words on the pages were meaningless. Spencer did keep up with work, he showed up on time and put in a great amount of effort to help solve their cases the team however were still worried about him. After the fourth week Hotch intervened telling Spencer to take some time to himself, just a few days to get his mind in the right place.

Spencer returned to work after taking his mandatory leave, he hadn’t slept much he would lie in bed awake hoping for slumber that never came and it showed. The amount of coffee he was now consuming was concerning. He had already had two cups before coming into work and now here he was in the kitchenette getting another cup. “Spence, you really need to rest.” JJ tell him. “I’m fine JJ.” He says walking back to his desk and putting his head down. He lifts his head when the room becomes frighteningly silent. He turns his head to see Y/N walking into the bullpen. When Gracia sees her she runs up to her to pull her into a hug but Y/N flinches back startled. Spencer can see the disappointment on Garcia’s face, “Oh I’m sorry I guess you don’t remember me.” Garcia says. Y/N pulls her lips into a tight line. “No sorry” She extends her hand out to Garcia, “I’m Y/N” Garcia takes her hand with a smile, “Penelope Garcia” Right then Rossi walks up and Y/N eyes shine bright in familiarity, “Oh hey Agent Rossi. It’s good to see you again.” “It’s good to see you as well. Hotch is waiting if you’re ready.” He says. She walks away with him heading in the direction of Hotch’s office. “What do you think is happening?” Prentiss asks. “She’s here that has to be a good sign. Right? Maybe some of her memories already came back.” Garcia says words filled with hope. Spencer did not want to have false hope. She had just been standing no more than five feet away from here but she could have practically been on the other side of the world. 

It turned out that so far none of Y/N’s memory had returned but she was in fact returning to work. She wouldn’t be working in the field she would be working from Quantico assisting Garcia. Spencer was nervous he wanted nothing more than to be near her but he also despised the memories that flooded forward when she was near. When she sat at her desk fiddling with the knick knacks she had received from Garcia and then he saw her pick up the photo of him and her that sat on her desk. He had forgotten it was there, she examined it closely and then turned making direct eye contact. Spencer felt like he was being interrogated but she said nothing, he got up and walked away to Garcia’s office just to not sit there like a fool. Luckily for him not long after the team got a case and he had an escape from her. 

Y/N was in Garcia’s Batcave offering her assistance. “I’m sorry about this morning.” Y/N says. “Oh it’s okay really. I’m sorry I was just so happy to see you I forgot about the memory loss thing.” Her comment makes Y/N laugh, “What?” Garcia asks. “Sorry stupid joke in my own head. You forgot about the memory loss. I know it’s not very funny but it is to me.” Y/N explains and then Garcia chuckles with her. With the two of them working together they have a lot of time when the team doesn’t need them. Y/N may not have her memory of the cases they have worked together, she may not remember the teams members or the bonds that they share, but she is still a genius and works just as fast as Garcia on a computer. While they are waiting to hear back from the team she decides to ask Garcia some questions, “Hey Garcia, how well would you say that you knew me or know me?” “I would say that I know you pretty well, we’re besties.” Y/N nods along listening to her as she tells stories about when they first met, the cases they have worked, and their time together outside of work. She is happy that Garcia is so forthcoming with information; when her mother finally did show up at the hospital she wouldn’t tell her anything at first and once she finally did Y/N couldn’t believe how much time she was missing. Nearly two years of her life gone in an instant, when she tried asking her mom about her life she didn’t have any answers which wasn’t surprising their family wasn’t close she only saw her parents on holidays if even then. She didn’t really have friends, acquaintances were made over the years, in her youth her peers were not her age and nineteen year old college students did not want to hang out with some kid. And then there was her work with the DoD, she detested it and because of that she never made close bonds with anyone. People would describe her as a recluse, but here she apparently made friends, close friends, she had only observed them for a short time but she could tell the team was like a family. And then there is Dr. Reid, he had been avoiding her and she wasn’t sure why based on the photo she found on her desk it would appear they are good friends so why was he hiding from her. “What’s my relationship with Dr. Reid like?” Y/N asks. Garcia is unsure of how to answer, she knows that she’ll find out the truth eventually but would telling her now make things better or worse for Y/N and Reid. Garcia wants nothing more than to see the two young geniuses happy and in love again, “You two are a close as can be. I think it’s the genius thing you almost have your own language.” Garcia says. That wasn’t what Y/N meant but she thought it best not to press the subject for now. She knew there was more than what anyone was willing to tell her. When she was released from the hospital and went home things were different. She found things that didn’t belong to her and from what she has seen so far she was sure those items belonged to him. But the question constantly racking her brain is there more to their relationship than everyone is letting on or is she misreading the situation. 

Two more weeks had passed and it seemed like things were returning to normal. Y/N had gotten into a good rhythm with the rest of the team even with being in confined to the BAU offices. She had gotten closest with Penelope but that accounted to them working side by side in her office. She had spoken with Spencer a few times only getting out niceties before he would flee. She had tried calling him to discuss the case in place of Garcia once and he rushed her off the phone. This was Y/N first case back in the field with the team, finally having been medically cleared. Y/N was in the kitchenette talking with Garcia and Prentiss, “Come on it’s just one night you’ll have fun.” Garcia pleads they are trying to convince her to join them for girl’s night. “I don’t think I will. I can’t drink with the medication I’m on” She explains. They let it go for now, Spencer walks in looking completely exhausted Prentiss and Garcia greet him but Y/N doesn’t, tired of him blatantly ignoring her if the discussion is not about work. When she sees him pouring nearly an entire cup of sugar into the mug of coffee she comments, “You keep pouring sugar in like that and it will turn to molasses.” When the words come out she stops feeling like this has happened before but she shakes the idea from her head walking to her desk. Spencer is not lost on the comment, he could remember the date, the time, he can even remember what she was wearing when she said that to him before. When Spencer gets to his desk he sees a bag of trail mix waiting for him, he doesn’t need to ask who left it here he already knows and he is grateful. 

Working their current case Spencer’s gaze stays on Y/N after the conversation that morning. It is the smallest glimpse of hope but he holds onto it. Even though she is cleared to work in the field Hotch had Y/N working at the precinct with Spencer. He had been avoiding her for so long it was awkward to be near her again almost like when they first met again. Y/N was working on the geographic profile with him she was trying to set a pin but the point was to high on the board, Spencer walks up behind her and to help her put the pin in the correct spot but he got too close with no warning and when he placed his hand on her, her elbow shot back shoving into his abdomen and he falls to the floor. “Shit! I’m sorry I didn’t mean to do that.” She says leaning down to check on him, “Are you okay?” He looks at her and her eyebrows are scrunched in frustration as she looks down at him. “I’m alright.” he groans, getting up from the ground. She is lifting the bottom of his shirt frantically and he is trying to push her hands away, “What are you doing?” His voice comes out as a squeak. “I’m making sure I didn’t hurt you. Internal bleeding can lead to organ failure, coma, and even death.” He laughs at her explanation. “I doubt you elbowed me hard enough to cause internal bleeding.” “Do you have a medical degree?” She asks condescendingly. “No and neither do you.” He says. The rest of the team has just gotten back and walked in to hear this argument, they are happy to see something familiar between the two. The team after successfully finding and arresting the unsub is on the jet heading back home. Spencer decided to challenge Y/N to a game of chess, “Check in 5.” He tells her, she moves a piece, “Checkmate in 3” She says with a smirk. He had already lost 4 games to her and with each win she became increasingly unbearable her superior attitude becoming more prevalent. They were sitting alone thankfully being unbothered by anyone on the team. “Do you have any plans for tomorrow?” Spencer asks. “I have a date.” She answers, not looking up still examining the board. Spencer’s ray of hope was snuffed out. “A date?” He asks. “Mhm, Garcia suggested it. And someone I see at the coffee shop by my house asked. So what’s the harm?” Y/N shrugs. Garcia suggested it was where Spencer’s brain was stuck. Why would she do that? It made no sense. When the plane landed almost everyone rushed to cars to head home, Hotch of course had paperwork to do and Spencer needed to talk to Garcia. “Hey boy wonder, what are you doing here?” “Did you tell Y/N she should go on a date?” “Yes, oh did you ask her? Did she say yes?” She asks excitedly. “She is going on a date with someone else? Why would you tell her to do that?” “I didn't. I told her to consider going on a date so that I could convince you to ask her on a date. I didn’t think she would agree to go with someone else. That wasn’t a part of the plan. Spencer is mad and storms out her office. He spends his weekend trying not to think of Y/N or her date. 

On Monday, Spencer got to work extra early not being able to sleep much. The only other person there so far was Hotch already working away in his office. When Y/N walks into the office she quietly walks over and sits at her desk and then she turns around and Spencer sees the large bruise on her face and he rushes over to her. “What happened?! Did this happen on your date?!” He asks frantically, grabbing a hold of her face and when he does his thumb grazes the bruise and she winces, “Ow! ow! Ow! Let go!” She yells, shoving his hand away. “No this did not happen on my date that guy was a total bore. This happened while boxing this morning.” “You should really have someone take a look at that.” He says, “I can go down to medical with you.” “I’m fine really. I don’t need to go anywhere.” “You had a traumatic brain injury before you need a medical professional to look at that. I can just go tell Hotch you know.” “Really? How old are you? You’re going to tell on me if I don’t go have my face examined.” “Yes.” “Ugh fine. Let’s go” She grumbles as the head to the elevator. In the elevator it’s silent, “Did you know that there are six elevator related deaths per year.” Spencer says. Y/N has heard that before it's so familiar yet so distant. “You chose now to bring that up.” The nurse checks out the injury and says it looks fun but gives her an icepack and some ibuprofen, but Spencer insists that they check more thoroughly. “Would you leave them alone. They said I am fine just like I told you they would. Can we get back to work now.” Spencer is muttering about  how unbelievably stubborn she can be. She gets to the door holding it open, “Let’s go, honeybee.” Did he hear that right? “What did you say?” “I said let’s go.” When they get back upstairs Morgan sees them and rushes over, “What the hell happened? Who’s ass do I have to kick?” Y/N laughs, “No one. Relax I missed a block while boxing this morning. Dr. Know-it-all already made me go down to medical. They said I’m fine.” She says gesturing to Spencer. “How did you miss the block?” Morgan asks. “I got distracted and as you can see I learned from it.” What she didn’t tell them is that what distracted her was a fragment of a memory, they had been happening for a while but just fragments nothing was clear it was like trying to see through a shattered mirror. She would catch glimpses of her life, the life she can’t fully grasp and it was also causing her to develop sporadic headaches. They didn’t have a case so they were working out of the office today. Half way through the day Y/N lays her head down on the table, headache intensifying, she figured the blow to the head this morning was causing the added effect. Spencer comes over to check on her and when he sees her eyes watering and her wincing at the light he insists she goes to see a real doctor. Spencer drives her to the doctor and waits with her. She lays her head on his shoulder falling asleep while waiting. It is comfortable to most normal Spencer has felt in months. When they finally call her name he doesn’t want to let her go alone but it is also a private exam, “Are you coming?” She asks. “You want me in there with you?” “Yep, let’s go Doogie Howser” “Who?” He asks, trailing behind her. “Really? You don’t know who that is?” “No, Why would I” “Oh my god. Genius, eidetic memory, child prodigy, any of that sound familiar.” She asks while they sit in the exam room. “I mean that could describe me.” “Yes it can but it also describes the main character of the show. You have to watch that. We can have a movie night and binge watch it.” The wait isn’t too long before the doctor walks in, “Oh Dr. Y/L/N is everything alright. That’s quite the bruise you’ve got there.” The doctor says reaching for her face but she pulls away leaning out of reach. “My face is fine. The headaches…” She looks over to Spencer before continuing, “they are getting worse.” “Are you still remembering things in fragments?” The doctor asks. “Your memory is coming back.” Spencer interrupts. “Yes but it’s still not clear.” she answers. “Unfortunately the headaches are most likely caused by the returning memories and unless it was worse before today getting hit in the head this morning only aggravated that. I can prescribe something for the pain but can not do anything to prevent them.” The doctor explains. “No, I will just deal with it.” She says before getting up to leave. Now her and Spencer were sitting in the car he wasn’t ready to move just yet. “Why haven’t you told anyone that your memory is returning?” He asks. “There is no use in giving everyone false hope. The bits that I get don’t make sense.” She sighs, “You ever look through one of those kaleidoscopes when you were a kid?” Spencer nods. “That’s what it’s like there is a lot of information but not one single memory has come through clearly. It’s frustrating.” He doesn’t know what she is going through. He doesn’t know how she feels but he can still be a pillar of support. He wraps his hand around hers squeezing lightly, “So you have a show I need to watch?” 

[audiblesmirking]

erratic heartbeats ~chapter 6: you gotta love them over-affectionate characters~

Legend: "English unless stated otherwise" --- 'Thoughts' --- "Telepathically speaking" --- [Authors' Note]

"what are you saying, mother...?" Azumi's eyes glistened with the tears she's been suppressing. "you had other intentions...?"

Akina sighed exasperatingly, raising a hand to rub her temple, trying to ease the growing headache. "... This wasn't the right time to tell you."

"Well, when were you planning to tell me?! Years later after I've mastered my psychic abilities?!"

"Yes." Aiken answered bluntly, looking straight at his daughter's eyes as it darts from his to his wife's. The look of betrayal was prominent on Azumi's face; with eyes the widest they have ever been since she was a child, and eyebrows furrowed in denial. She refused to comment on her father's brutally honest reply. Not like she could anyway; a lump had already formed in her throat, preventing her from speaking clearly without her voice cracking midsentence. As if a rope of thorns are wrapped around her neck, occasional sharp pains pricked her throat.

"There was no other options to choose from so quickly. We feared your powers would be too much too soon, so we went with the best decision we thought." Aiken explained, maintaining eye contact as Azumi takes unconscious small steps back until her calves bumped the sofa. At the unexpected impact, she almost lost balance and, fortunately, didn't fall on her butt on the couch. It would have been embarrassing to argue after just falling.

"This issue involves me! Why didn't you consult to me first?!" She was now yelling, the dam in her tear ducts breaking and sending rivers down her cheeks. "If you thought lying to save you the trouble of talking to me would be best, you were wrong!"

"But I suppose you're too busy with other things to care about—" Azumi cut her sentence short went she silently choked on her saliva. Usually, she'd be embarrassed, but she was too deep in emotion to be feeling only a specific one for a moderate amount of time.

"What does that supposed to imply?!" Akina joined her daughter in standing, seemingly understanding her words despite it being abruptly cut. "We're doing this for you! For when you've given up all your powers you've had your whole life to your child! When you turn into an ordinary person, atleast you'll live in comfort. In luxury!" Azumi was irritated at her mother's assumption of procreating. How dare she, she doesn't get to decide on that. Whether she decides on an offspring is up to Azumi.

"I don't need luxury if it means I have to be neglected by my own parents! Parents who could always spare time for their lonely daughter, who spent all her life trying to achieve all her parents' expectations hoping to be rewarded with praise and attention." Azumi tried not to sniffle too loud, not bothering to wipe her tears. "and receiving nothing after all those years." Azumi walked away, the first time she's done that to her parents, and she felt a new sense of freedom by doing so.

"Azumi—!" Aiken was already by his wife's side, shutting her up.

"It's fine. Let her be alone for the remainder of the evening. We'll discuss about this again some other time..." He looked at his wife in the eyes as he held her in place, knowing she'll follow their daughter to her room demanding an explanation for her deplorable behavior. "We're also at fault here, Akina."

——————————

The next day, Azumi woke up all puffy and blotchy after crying so hard last night. She intended to wake up just after Aiken and Akina left for work, so she could prevent running into them in breakfast and in departing. Not like they ever encounter everyday in the morning, anyway.

.

.

.

Azumi arrived at school early, so she decided to take a detour from her usual walk straight to her classroom. She headed to the side of the school, where very few people would choose to walk through, and sat down on the concrete bench surrounding one of the trees. It was a windy morning, mild gusts of air blowing from the east, providing Azumi with the coolness she needs to feel as comfortable as possible. She was content on simply watching the leaves sway and fall from the wind until the morning bell chimes, but she was interrupted.

"Huh? Little buddy?"

Azumi turned to see Nendou approaching her. 'I didn't pin Nendou to be one of the early birds.' She gave a small wave, before redirecting her attention to the sky. 'But maybe it's just for today that he arrived here early, I do remember him mentioning about some early morning try-outs.'

"What are you doing here? Let's go to our classroom!" He beamed, before shifting his expressions to a more playful one. "Or did you forget where to go? Don't worry, little buddy, I'll show you the way!"

Azumi smiled at this. "No, I didn't forget. I just thought of clearing my head before school starts." She watched as he walked closer to her to listen more clearly to what she was saying, before another gust of wind blew the trees and drew her attention back to them.

Nendou decided to sit down next to her, planting each of his palms on the concrete beside his thighs and leaning back, using his arms for support. "Eh? Clear your head? Where will your brain go then?"

She lightly laughed, sparing her friend a glance. "It's not that type of clearing. I just want to forget about what happened to me last night."

"Huh, something happened to you last night?"

"Say, Nendou, how is your relationship with your parents?" Azumi realized her confession, and attempted to change the subject before her companion pries too much.

"I only have my mom. My dad died before I was born..."

"I–I'm sorry to have brought it up." Azumi felt bad for being so insensitive, she intertwined her fingers together and broke eye contact with Nendou. "How is your relationship with your mom, then?"

"Oh, we're doing fine!" His drastic change in expressions is questionable. "She got a new job at this company that she says pays more. I'm really happy about that, because my mom says she can buy me new shoes now! Though, last night she made me clean my room because I came home late and made her worry... Oh yeah! What happend to you last night? You hadn't told me that yet"

'To think that he came back to the topic after my distraction.'

"A–Ah, that..." Azumi hesitated, 'I guess telling him would be fine. I mean, he's not one to judge the lives of his friends, right? I'll just leave out the whole psychic powers thing.' She sighed.

"... I had a fight with my parents..."

•°●•°●•°●

"I feel like a kid who got beat up by a delinquent on their first day at a new school."

Azumi wanted to talk to Saiki about what she found out from her parents last night. She wished to tell him, most likely out of spite from being lied to, but also because it involves him as well. Just after she rounded a corner, she was surprised to see an unfamiliar student walking next to Saiki as she was heading to her classroom. She raised a hand to fiddle with her ear cuff, curious to know what his relationship was with the new student.

"I don't get why you want to hide it. Psychic powers would get you all sorts of attention." The new student was being too loud with his words in their sort of environment.

Azumi raised her eyebrows at the thoughts incoming behind her and hid in an empty classroom. She felt Teruhashi about to walk by and pass the two boys walking ahead of her.

"That's what I don't want."

A few seconds and a gasp later... 'Looks like the new transfer student fell for me, too.' Kokomi cheered in her head as she leaves the hallway, bringing Azumi out of her hiding spot. She furrowed her brows at what Teruhashi had done, confused on why she would actively search through the school looking for the transfer student only to receive a mere gasp for her efforts. She can always wait for him to hear about her and watch as he finds her. Atleast in that way, she can just sit pretty.

"Wh–Who is that beautiful girl?!"

"That's Teruhashi-san. She passed by us on purpose. You should be thankful."

Toritsuka Reita reacted loudly, shaking the shoulders of Saiki, before quickly being flocked by girls. All of which are curious about the news that spread about his psychic abilities.

"Saiki-san..." Toritsuka began, seemingly shocked by the crowd, but easily recovering. He smiled and gave a thumbs up in Saiki's direction. "Maybe I can settle for this."

'It'll die down, soon enough' Azumi thought, taking the chance to stand beside Saiki as if she had just arrived. She kept her hands in her pockets as the two psychics witness Toritsuka do his job in impressing the girls before him. "Who is he?" Azumi feigned ignorance of the situation, turning her head to look at the friend beside her.

Saiki shortly glanced at her in masked skepticism, before looking back at the gathering people around the spirit medium. "Toritsuka Reita." Azumi nodded in response, turning as well to watch the commotion in front of her.

Takahashi and his friends insisted Toritsuka tell their spirit guardians after initially being ignored, which inconvenienced the spirit medium in his quest to woo every girl that are around him. "Okay, let's see..." Toritsuka deadpanned, sparing them only a quick look. "Geezer, hag, hag, and hag. Okay, it's done."

Azumi got overwhelmed by the growing number of people gathered in the hallway, she sought solitude. In her attempt to walk away, she drew the attention of Toritsuka. "W–Wait—! You there, don't you want to know your guardian spirit?!" He gaped as she ignored him and left to go to her classroom. Toritsuka turned to the psychic he knows. "Saiki-san, do you know her?!"

"Ah, that was Kanasawa-san. She was new here on the first day."

"She's got a crazy powerful guardian spirit. Maybe even a psychic...?" He whispered to Saiki, to which his words piqued his interest.

He was about to repsond, when Kaidou came and interjected. "Guardian spirits? What nonsense." He acted uninterested, despite his thoughts telling otherwise. "Still, I'd suppose it would be rude not to hear you out. So tell me what my guardian spirit, or whatever, is."

Toritsuka was about to deadpan at him as well, but his guardian spirit was too interesting to not comment on. "Huh? Your guardian spirit is quite abnormal."

'Seriously?! 'Quite abnormal'?! Is it a demon?! A sealed monster?! A dark spirit?!'  "I-I see. So what is it? Tell me." Kaidou had an obvious blush on his face, but despite his excitement, he lowered his voice to maintain his appearance of uninterest.

"It's a chihuahua."

"Ch-Chihuahua?!" Kaidou exclaimed as the students around started laughing. Looking down on his clenched fist, he started mumbling to himself. "How dare he?! I bet he's a fraud!"

Toritsuka faced Saiki. "Introduce me to her so I can tell her about her guardian spirit." His favor sounded friendly, but adding in his expressions and his true thoughts, it became too friendly and borderline perversion. 'Cute, cute, cute, cute, cute, cute, cute. She looked so cute...' Not like he wasn't a pervert, anyway.

"What was that about, Kanasawa-sensei? Are you feeling alright?"

"Quit repeating 'cute' in your head...!"  Saiki directed his thoughts to only the spirit medium, irritated at his noisy mind.

——————————

Aiken looked up from his desk, seeing the faces of two of his co-workers. "Hmm? What do you mean, Kinji-san?" He addressed the hospital resident who was with him in the OR, lowering the pen he was holding.

"In the surgery a while ago..." Kinji started.

"Why, what about it? Did I cut something wrong in any way?" Aiken knit his eyebrows, worry bubbling within him.

"No, it's not that. You did everything perfectly."

"So what's the problem here?"

"The problem is, you did everything. It was as if there was no one there to assist you in the surgery." The other doctor, Taiji, replied. He was there to confront Aiken after having been approached by Kinji. 'I appointed a number of residents under Kanasawa-san, because he was the best of the best, but how can they learn from him if he doesn't give them a chance?'

"Yes, is there something bothering you? This normally isn't the case." Kinji held on the backrest of the chair on the other side of Kanasawa's desk, contemplating if he should sit down or not.

Aiken sighed, leaning back on his chair. "It's a family issue. I apologize. I promise it will be ameliorated by tomorrow."

.

.

.

"Kanasawa-sama, the new managers of the marketing department have arrived. We are waiting for you to teach them the ropes." A petite young woman entered Akina's office after notifying her presence with a knock.

Akina looked up from her documents, she had finished little in the span of the morning, and the executive secretary took notice of this. "Is that so?" She turned back to the papers on her desk, lifting her pen to scribble in her signature. "Call in one of the presidents to lead on the managers. Whoever you choose that best fit the role will be my substitute." She spoke after a moment of silence.

"Are you not feeling well, Kanasawa-sama?"

"Yes, and so I entrust the decision to you, May-san." Akina looked at the young psychic in the eyes, an aura of superiority radiating off of the CEO. "Good luck."

"Come on, Saiki-san..." Toritsuka pestered Kusuo after he followed him around the whole day, through lunch and even now as they were walking out of the campus.

"As you wish, Kanasawa-sama" She bowed before leaving the room. May heard the sigh coming from her supervisor right before she fully shut the door.

——————————

Toritsuka mistakenly thought Nendou was a ghost a while ago, having swung his bag at him, and were now on their way to his home at the temple to explain his reason for assault.

"Just tell me more about Kanasawa-san!" He whined like a child that was denied from eating candy. "The ghosts avoid me like the plague when I ask about her from them."

"They do?" The new information grabbed Saiki's attention, but he didn't turn to look at his companion. "Well, they should."

"Is she a psychic like you? Because I think her guardian spirit might be an ancestor of hers. They look alike..." Toritsuka gave up on his begging, knowing that Saiki will not let out information even if he cried all night. Toritsuka leaned his head back on his interlocked fingers, before his saliva was practically drooling from the corner of his mouth. "But if she is someone with psychic powers, then I should've come to her instead."

Saiki smacked the back of his head with his psychokinesis, glaring at him from the corners of his eyes. "Hey! Don't go changing your mind after annoying me last night."

"Ow—! That hurt you kno—" Toritsuka cut off his own sentence when something in him clicked, as if the slap urged the gears in his brain to work. "Kanasawa... Does Kanasawa-san live next to you?!" He held the shoulders of the psychic beside him.

Saiki frowned at his personal question and invasion of personal space. "Why would you want to know?"

"Last night, while I was walking to your house, I passed by this huge house that was beside yours. It had 'Kanasawa' written in the gate's plaque." Saiki raised an eyebrow, having already known the information, but Toritsuka continued. "It was strange, because there were no ghosts hanging around and in the lot. There are a lot of ghosts that prefer to hang out in mansions, so it came as a surprise when I saw absolute zero ghosts when I passed by."

Saiki hummed in response, before throwing off Reita's hands from his shoulders using his powers. He contemplated with the new information he received, continuing with his walk. 'Her family is a mystery, even with the help of ghosts. As I thought, there is no other way to figure them out without getting close to them.'

"We're here. Okay, could you touch me while using your psychometry?" Toritsuka said after they stopped infront of his house, making Saiki push the topic of the Kanasawa's some other time. "I think you'll know why I made the mistake I made a while ago."

As Saiki stared at him suspiciously, he held his shoulders and activated his psychometry. "This is..."

Kusuo trailed off as he saw a Nendou lookalike sleeping on the ground while leaning on the stairs "Let me introduce you. This is my guardian spirit" Toritsuka looked ashamed, and didn't even look at Saiki in the eyes when he talked.

"You really do have it tough"

•°●•°●•°●

Azumi dreaded to enter her house, standing in front of the double doors and contemplating whether to enter or to retreat to a nearby park. 'No, I shouldn't postpone this any longer. It is bound to happen, anyway.'  With gathered confidence, she pushed opened the door and walked in.

'They're either waiting in the main living room, my room, or the dining room.' Azumi hoped they were in the dining room, but the call she heard after being halfway in walking past the main living room, proved otherwise. 'Living room it is...'

She silently entered and sat in the exact spot she was the other night, feeling the gazes of Akina and Aiken as she does.

A heavy silence hanged in their air, each member of the family waiting for the other to speak up. Aiken chose to start. "It has come to our attention that you have been feeling neglected and ignored by your mother and I... and, we wish to amend the mistake we made and be given another chance to become proper parents to you." He spoke slowly, thinking over his words before it would be said, so as not to offend anyone. "I hope our talk today will enlighten all three of us of the hardships we each have encountered, and discuss a proper solution to help."

"There should be no raising of voices. We are here to talk and to listen." Aiken finished, looking at the expressions of his wife and daughter to see if they understand and agree or not. The two nodded, making Aiken nod as well.

The Kanasawa couple met gazes, and Aiken prompted his wife to talk. "I... have come to realize that I oftentimes cut you off... Zumi-chan. I didn't know it would have a greater effect on you than waiting for you to finish what you're saying. I'm sorry. This is more on a problem of self, so I don't wish for you to change because of what I've done."

Azumi stared at her mother, harboring mixed feelings on the apology she received. She looked down, thinking over of what to say. "An apology is the first step to redemption... and so, I accept your apology." She took notice of the wistful look on her father. 'Ah, I guess he has nothing to talk about, because we almost never talk—or do anything, really—alone.' Despite Azumi thinking her father had nothing to share, she was surprised to hear his voice.

"I apologize for not spending any of my time with you, Zumi-chan." He looked down, with his eyebrows low, he refused to look at his daughter. "I will make it up to you over time. We'll be bonding together atleast once a week, now."

Azumi furrowed her eyebrows at his words. "But your work..."

"I can always have a number of leaves a month. Since I'm a talented volunteer, they treasure me enough to let me manage my own schedule."

"And I can always reschedule." Akina added in. "You were right. No amount of money can ever replace the love from your parents." Akina genuinely smiled at Azumi, who slowly returned the smile. "I'm sorry it took so long for us to realize."

"it's okay, as long as you both won't forget." Azumi weakly said, afraid to hear her voice crack as a lump formed in her throat just as what happened last time.

"Ah, before I forget. About what you said of being well-rounded yesterday." Aiken raised his head.

"A–Ah, that. You can just put it off as me blabbering because of anger. I wasn't thinking straight last night."

"No, what you say matters." Azumi locked eyes with her mother. Her eyes widened by a fraction at the words she never expected to hear from Akina. "I cared too much about you being powerless, I pushed you to be perfect in every aspect. I hoped that even without psychic abilities, you can live your life whatever you wish, and pursue your dream job, as if you had them. I was obviously wrong."

"I'm sorry, as well, that I made you master various martial arts. I was simply concerned for when you encounter immoral people, and had no other way to protect yourself. By the time your powers awakened, you've already achieved all the highest honor of belts." It was Aiken's turn to lock eyes with his daughter. "I'm very proud of you."

"I pushed you to perfect every instrument, sport and hobby I give you. And I truly am sorry for everything I have put you through." Akina said after her husband finished. "I am very proud of you as well, Zumi."

Everything was going too fast and is overlapping with each other in Azumi's mind. She heard an apology and words of praise from both her mother and her father, so why isn't she satisfied? Was she too stuck up to genuinely accept their words? If so, she's feeling very horrible right now. Nevertheless, she forced a smile and wordlessly nodded. She didn't know what to think of right now, and ought to think it through the night.

"We'll be holding something similar to this every week, so we can improve our communication with each other." Aiken concluded, standing up from his seat, his family following suit. "Now, let's have dinner. I'm famished."

——————————

It was Saturday, and Azumi woke up pretty early; that is, if you can count 10:15 am as early. She had a sports lesson with Furushima Yumi, the volleyball captain she met during 'chapter iii.', and ought to prepare before their agreed time of 11:30 am.

She finished everything, from changing into her sports attire to packing water and towels in one of her bags, after almost an hour. 'Alright, 15 minutes is probably enough time for me to arrive at the school. But only if I run... Should I take the car?' While she was contemplating whilst headed for the stairs that lead down to the ground floor, she saw, from the corner of her eye, a frantic boy in front of her gate. 'Toritsuka-san?'

Azumi watched as he shouted at seemingly nothing, elaborating huge gestures as he does. 'What in the world is he going on about?'  She was curious to know what has gotten him so worked up. 'Kusuo-san's house is over there, anyway.' With her heightened hearing, without touching her power limiter, she listened in on what the spirit medium has been talking about with the air.

"Come on, it'll only take a few seconds to peek inside..." Toritsuka dragged on, slouching his back and hanging his arms, slowly getting tired of all the ruckus he's been creating. "What's so terrifying about that mansion, anyway...?"

He stayed silent for a moment, most likely listening to the ghost he's conversing's explanation. "Eh? Is that so?" He looked at the front door of Azumi's house, before sighing. "I guess I'll wait for Kanasawa-san to come out. Oh, I bet she'll be super cute today, too~!"

Azumi grimaced in disgust at his last words. 'Yeah, I should take the car.'

.

.

.

"Azumi-san—!" Furushima took notice of the approaching figure of Kanasawa, placing down her water bottle and excitedly jogging towards the girl. "You're here!" She beamed, eyes creasing in delight and arms open to hug.

Azumi slowed her walking at the gesture the volleyball captain was showing, hesitating on whether or not she was comfortable enough to accept the hug.

In the end, she awkwardly wrapped her arms around Furushima, choosing to be polite and accept the gesture of affection.

After the first few volleyball lessons that happened between the two, Azumi thought they were close enough to be called by each other's names. "ah-hah... Did I make you wait, Yumi-senpai?" She let out a short nervous laugh before stating her question.

Furushima released herself from the hug, but let her hands rest on Azumi's forearms, smile unfaltering. "Not at all. But I have missed you since our last meeting." Before the psychic could respond, the volleyball captain was already ushering her towards the court, a hand gently guiding her back. "I thought you were ready to play with a team, so I invited a few of my friends, if you don't mind."

"No, it's fine. It's a fundamental part of playing volleyball, after all."

As if Furushima's smile couldn't possibly get any bigger, it just did. "You look pretty as usual today, Azumi-san..." Once again, Kanasawa was unable to reply when one of Yumi's friends yelled their greeting once they saw them walking towards the court.

==========

A/N

discuss plot holes of "erratic heartbeats" with us! @ the link in my bio.

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Best Friend (18)**

Jason Momoa x Reader

Warning: Slow Burn, Plot, Cursing, Angst, The Burn Ends, NSFW, SMUT

Word Count: 6.3k

Summary: Inspired by “Best Friend” by Tweet & Bilal. Jason is your best friend, and you are his. End of summary. 😊 ❤❤️

Note: Italic text is a flashback memory. So we’ve come to the end of this road. Look at me finishing shit and not leaving them open. Ayyyye! 💃🏾💃🏾 At least, I think this is the end. We’ll see.

**Loosely Proofread/Edited**

**Interactive**

Thank you guys for reading, I appreciate it. If you enjoyed this please LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG. ❤❤️

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“How long will you make him suffer?”

 Spinning around you saw Jordan leaning on the wall of your office with his arms crossed. You knew that he and Dre had bitten their tongue this entire time. They were close to Jason and you were sure he told them what was going on and what happened. They hadn’t cornered you or treated you differently. They kept silent and let you do you. You wondered when they would approach you, when your time would run out. Guess it was today, six weeks since all the drama went down.

 “Make who suffer?”

 “Don’t play dumb, Y/N. We all know you’re smart as hell, so dumb doesn’t look cute on you.” You snorted and laughed to yourself. You didn’t stop moving though. You kept doing what you were doing. You had an hour to finish up your paperwork for the day. You were in need of some alcohol therapy.

 “Ignoring me now?”

 “Jordan, my god. What do you want?”

 “The question is what do you want?” Jordan walked in and sat at the edge of your desk. You didn’t respond.

 “I’ll wait. You can only ignore things for so long, right?”

Sighing you put down the papers and leaned back in your chair and looked at him. “I want to finish this so I can get a drink.”

 “Look he’s been my friend since we were like eighteen. He’s my boy, I’d do anything for him. I know he’s difficult, and he comes with a lot. I know it’s hard to get close to him, but you know better than anyone how to handle him. I’ve wondered for years how long it would take for the two of you to get together. Y’all never made it easy, but y’all never were like this. I know how you feel about him, and I know how he feels about you. I get he was an asshole and he fucked up, but from where I’m sitting you did too.” You looked down at the desk and thought about his words. He was right you both fucked up.

 “Is it really worth letting everything go, friendship and everything? Can you live letting everything go and walking away?”

 “Jordan--,” you began before he interrupted you.

 “Answer the question. Are you okay just moving on and the two of you going your separate ways?”

 “It’s not that easy.”

 “Of course it is. If the answer is no, then make it right give in. if the answer is yes, then dead it and move on. Simple,” Jordan explained. You rolled your eyes. He made it seem like breathing.

 “I need time.” Again, Jordan interrupted you.

 “You’ve had six weeks. Forty-two days.”

 “So there should be a time limit on the amount of time I need?”

 “No, definitely not Y/N. At some point the question becomes not if you need time, but if you are using needing time as a crutch for your fears? A crutch that will keep everything and everyone paused causing more harm than good.”

 Your jaw dropped for many reasons. One, because Jordan had just dropped the mother of all philosophical proverbs. Two, in dropping that mother of all philosophical proverbs he rendered you speechless without a single word to speak in defense or defiance. Three, he made sense. The look of shock must have been a severe one. Jordan’s laugh filled the room.

 “You don’t gotta look so surprised. I can be deep.”

 You smiled and nodded in agreement. He could be deep. Neither of you spoke for a few moments. You still didn’t know what to say. Thankfully, he took initiative with continuing the conversation.

 “I’m not on anyone’s side except the side of love. You love him, he loves you. The rest—can be worked out. Love, Y/N. It matters.” With those last words, he turned and walked right back out of the office, leaving you to sit behind the desk replaying his words.

 He was right. You were using time as a crutch. You were allowing the chasm of time to do whatever it chose to your relationship—friendship or otherwise. You were doing this because you were terrified. Unlike your other boyfriends, with Jason, you were in real danger of falling so completely and fully that where you ended, and another began would cease to be determinable. You knew without a doubt that Jason was the other side of your coin, your yin to your yang, your twin flame. With something that was meant to be so intense, so encompassing something that flamed so hot and so bright it was destined not to last. Everything in history proved it to be true. You were afraid to begin because you were afraid of the end. You knew you wouldn’t survive it—survive him.

 It wasn’t fair. You’d come to see it a few nights after the gala. You saw it the first night you dared to join your friends Jason included for drinks. You felt his eyes on you ninety-eight percent of the time and the remaining two percent he spent shooting down every advance the women around made. He also made sure to stay clear of you while somehow letting you know what his intentions were, where his heart was. You felt it, it was impossible to ignore. It wasn’t fair.

 When you made it home that evening, you were already late to join everyone at Ziao. Despite your best efforts to hurry in getting ready you kept getting distracted by memories, by his scent. It had been weeks since he was here, but his scent still lingered. You could still feel him everywhere. You missed him more today than you had when you first walked away from him on that cliff. The weight of that made your movements sluggish.

An hour late was when you made it to Ziao. When you got there, it was close to eight and the night crowd was now filling up the area. you tried to ignore the overlapping conversation and search around for your friends. You unintentionally locked eyes with a tall man with short curly hair and a strong jaw. He was attractive. Though it was just a momentary pause he had enough time to wink at you and smile. As you looked away barely registering him he gave you a once over just before you found your friends.

 As you approached them, Jason was the first to see you. He paused his movement as his hand rose to his lips for a sip from his glass and locked eyes with you. God, you thought. Every time your eyes met it felt like the most intense electric surge. As quickly as you could, you looked away. You knew if you held his gaze for too long you may say or do something provocative.

 “Finally, my god. We said seven,” Cassie said as she briefly hugged you.

 “Hi. I know. I’m sorry.” You hugged everyone else but Jason. The disappointment on his face was evident and nearly broke your heart.

“I’m here now. What did I miss?”

 “Four drinks,” Toya blurted out as she waved a waiter over.

 “We’ll have another round, but this one will have five of what we all just had.”

 “Five? Toya, maybe ease me into it,” you rose.

 “Nope. Tardy for the party you gotta catch up.”

 You could see what kind of night this was going to be. The five of them talked and laughed as they always did. Everyone always got along so well. You sat back and listened to the conversation but had no input. You were working too hard to keep your eyes off of Jason and to suppress the rising urge to throw yourself onto him.

 When the waiter returned with a platter full of drinks your eyes widened. She put five shot glasses before you which had Toya and Cassie clapping their hands in excitement. You were not excited.

 “Bottoms up, titties down!” You snorted hearing Toya’s pre-drink cry.

 Wasting no time with protest you downed the first two glasses within seconds of the other. You took a breath to cool your taste buds and jumped into the next two. After four drinks your belly was on fire, it was a fire that was slowly coursing through your veins.

 “Come on, one more,” Dre encouraged. Rolling your eyes, you took the last glass which was bigger than the four before it and knocked it back. Instantly you knew this was a Jason drink. It was strong, intense and rapidly killing all your brain cells.

 “Fuck! That was strong!” The four of them cheered out loud leaving Jason quiet with a placated smirk across his face.

 “I love Fridays!”

 What happened after that was inevitable. The six of you danced up a storm in the sea of bodies that had come out for the same reasons, to get drunk, cut loose and maybe leave with someone who wanted to continue the party elsewhere. As you danced with Cassie and Toya using their bodies as women usually did when dancing together you felt the worries you’d had hours before melting away. You didn’t care right now. All you cared about was the steady flow of drinks and the music booming around you.

 You didn’t care that for that you could feel Jason in the same room, no matter how full it was and no matter how many guys approached trying to distract you from that matter. You didn’t care that half the time you caught a glimpse of Jason he was sitting at your booth nursing a drink with his shoulders slumped as if he’d lost his best friend. Maybe he had. It didn’t matter right now, you intentionally pressed ignore on your mental capabilities surrounding that. You even tried to press ignore whenever you saw him on the dancefloor around Dre and Jordan and a pretty young thing approached trying to secure a partner to have some fun with. Each of these women he shot down. It was like when he said no to one, they tagged in someone else to then be rejected. It was amusing but it made you feel good.

 By the time midnight rolled around, you’d had too much to drink, your feet hurt, and exhaustion was claiming you. Breaking away from your friends you made your way through the crowd to the bar and ordered two drinks. As you waited you closed your eyes and tried to push off the effects of the alcohol and music. You weren’t drunk, but you’d drank way more than you intended.

 “Who does he think he is?”

 Your head spun to the burnett beside you who was leaning against the bar looking out over the crowd.

 “Uh—excuse me?”

 “That guy. Who does he think he is?”

You looked to where she was looking but you couldn’t tell who she was talking about. There were a lot of guys in the building tonight.

 “Um, I don’t know who you’re talking about.”

 “That one, long hair, hot as an asteroid from outer space, with intense eyes right in the middle,” she explained. You looked around and zeroed in on who she was talking about—Jason. You almost snorted.

 “What about him?”

 “He refuses to dance with anyone. Every girl that tries he rejects. It’s like he thinks he’s some hot piece of ass. I mean I agree he is a hot piece of ass. God, he looks like he could break me in half. Is it strange to be attracted to that? To want to be broken in half?”

 You couldn’t stop your laughter this time. It escaped you before you could clamp your hand over your mouth.

 “I just said that out loud. I’m sorry,” the brunette admitted.

 “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have laughed. It just popped out.”

 “It’s fine. I regret nothing. It was all true,” she added. You looked to Jason and slowly looked over him. She was right, he was hot.

 “You’re right though, he is hot.”

 “I know, but he doesn’t want any of us. I’ve watched all night, and no one has gotten any play.”

 Again, you smiled. “Maybe he’s in a relationship.”

 “Maybe. If so, whoever she is, is one lucky woman. He probably breaks her in half every night.”

 Again, you laughed but this time it was very loud. When you looked back to the crows Jason was looking at you with concern on his face. He was probably wondering if you’d hit your alcohol limit. Always the protector, you thought before you downed both of your drinks.

 “He definitely looks like he has it in him.” You walked past her and back into the crowd toward your friends. As you walked to them, you saw Jason walk away toward an exit and disappear within the crowd. Once you joined them again Cassie threw her arm around you.

 “These drinks are so good.”

 “They’re strong too,” you added.

 “Are you drunk?”

 “No, but in order to not get drunk I’m calling it,” you shouted competing with the music. Toya and Cassie both whined in protest.

 “Nooo, come on. It’s Friday we have five more hours until the sun comes up. Let’s enjoy them.”

 “Oh my god, that sounds exhausting. All I want is to take these shoes off, strip and get into bed. I’m done.” You hugged them together and patted their backs. You knew they wouldn’t be getting in until the sun was coming up.

 “All right be careful.”

 “We got em’ Y/N,” Dre assured. You nodded knowing it as a fact, they would protect them no matter what. You sometimes wondered if Dre and Jordan had underlining feelings for Cassie and Toya, feelings they had yet to admit to. It was possible you missed it being so wrapped up in your drama. You made a note to bring it up over the weekend. Maybe your friend group could turn into something more.

 You kissed each of their cheeks before you pushed through the crowd to the exit. Once outside you took several deep breaths of the cool night air. Inside was stuffy, almost suffocating but out here gave you the freedom to breathe. Leaning on the wall you took out your phone and opened the Lyft app. It was probably a fifteen-minute walk back to your place, but your feet were killing you too badly to walk there. The other option was to cut through the beach using the sand as a cushion for your aching feet.

 It took seconds for you to make the choice. After rushing across the busy street, you leaned against a palm tree and caught your breath. When you opened your eyes there was Jason across the street in front of the club with his eyes glued to you. You didn’t move instead you stood there as he slowly walked across the street to you. With each of his steps, you found your heart beating faster and faster. When Jason was before you he raked his fingers through his hair showing off every angle of his gorgeousness.

“Going home?”

 All you could muster was a nod.

 “Can I walk you home?” Again, you nodded. He looked surprised but all he did was nod in return.

 The two of you took a few steps before you stopped again and bent down to unbuckle your heels. Once free from them you dug your toes into the sand, sighed then groaned. The coolness of the sand was helping with the pain. You were in no rush to move.

 “Piggyback ride?”

 Looking at him, it sounded tempting. It was something that was normal for the two of you. He’d often give you piggyback rides and never broke a sweat while doing it.

 “Sounds so tempting but, I’m okay for now.”

 You fell into step beside him again. For several long minutes neither of you spoke, you just walked with the sound of the waves and the beats from passing cars or clubs mingling in the air. Normally silence between the two of you never gave you anxiety. The two of you had the ability to be around each other and not feel the need to fill each passing moment with words and it would remain as comfortable as a Sherpa blanket. Now, you could feel the uneasiness between you.

 Every so often you snuck peeks at him. Every time you did he always looked to be so far away, as if he were not actually there with you. You wondered what he was thinking, wondered if he missed you as much as you missed him, you wondered how he was doing. Slowly you roamed his body for any signs he may not be taking care of himself. Every time you saw him his exhausted demeanor was always on your mind. From the look of him, he wasn’t sleeping. You wanted to say something, but you didn’t know where to even begin.

 Before you knew it you’d made it to the complex. All you had to do was cross the street and go inside. Looking back at him you felt your nerves overtake you which stopped any of the words you wanted to say.

 “Thanks.”

 “Anytime,” Jason replied. You nodded then walked across the street still holding your heels in one hand and your clutch in the other. As you were about to go inside you hesitated. Everything inside of you was reaching out for him, all you had to do was give him one sign. When you turned back he was still there.

 “Wanna come up?”

 “Do you want me to come up?” You took a few moments to think about it then nodded. Jason walked across the street to you. Once he was in front of you he closed the gap leaving a few inches between you all the while never looking from your eyes. The urge to just grab him and stick your tongue down his throat was overwhelming, but you resisted.

 “To talk.” The look in his eyes changed from hopeful and flirtatious to fearful. Slowly he nodded as if he’d just been given a death sentence.

 You turned and walked inside leading him to the elevator bank. Once Jason pressed the call button the two of you stepped inside and took a silent ride up to your floor. He kept his hands stuffed in his jeans and his eyes glued to the dial as the numbers increased. The ride up gave you some time to formulate the words you wanted to say in some order. You’d never been in this situation and you didn’t want to ever be in this situation ever again.

 As the doors opened both of you remained where you were for a few moments. Only when the doors began to close did Jason reach his hand out to stop them and give you the opportunity to go out first. Once you unlocked the door you held it open for him. Jason took one step in and paused. You could see him take a deep breath in. When he opened his eyes you recognized the look all too well. You were going to need alcohol.

 By the time Jason walked inside the apartment you already had two bottles and two glasses down and were setting up in the living room. He didn’t sit, he stood by the wall closest to his bedroom. Part of you was glad he didn’t go in. If he did he would see his sheets a mess because you slept in his bed from time to time all to be closer to him. You would have to explain it and you weren’t sure how.

 “Rum still your drink of choice?”

 “I think you know that’ll never change about me,” he responded. You poured a half glass, held it out to him and waited for him to come and get it. Jason didn’t move right away, instead, he looked at the glass then to your face and back again.

 “I think one of us should keep a clear head right now.”

 You studied him and knew what he meant. Shrugging you drank down the Rum yourself then sat on the couch. You sat there and allowed the burn of the Rum to flow through you. You loved that intense burn in your gut, the burn that spread like a fanned flame and gave you a hum as well as a glow of warmth. You’d drank enough to know it was the beginning of a buzz. You poured another half glass and guzzled it closing your eyes for a few moments to allow it to take over. Liquid courage. You knew now why it was called that.

 “How’ve you been?” Your voice was quiet and small, almost like a whisper.

 “Good.” You spun around to look at him.

 “Really?” Jason clenched his jaw, took a deep breath and looked down at the floor. Shaking his head, he rubbed his bearded jaw then scoffed.

 “No. I’ve been terrible.”

 “You don’t look like you’ve slept.”

 “I barely do. Some nights it’s okay, I’m okay, but others—I just can’t. so, I keep busy, work, working out, therapy, working out and do it again.”

 “Is—is therapy helping?”

 He studied you before he spoke. “Yeah, it helps a lot actually. I’ve been able to pinpoint patterns and work through a lot of things, things I didn’t even realize I’d been carrying,” Jason explained.

 “Good. I’m glad that it’s helping. I’m glad that you’re still going.”

 “Yeah, I meant what I said Y/N. I want to do better; I want to be a better man.” The two of you stared at each other and spoke sonnets with just your eyes. Words didn’t seem necessary, but you knew they had to be said.

 “Come sit with me?

 Again, Jason looked terrified. He remained where he was for almost a full minute before he slowly moved to the couch where you were. He sat next to you with enough space for someone else to sit between you. You didn’t know if it was an intentional move or subconscious. You wanted him to be closer, so you made the move. Tucking your legs underneath you on the couch you crawled the distance to him and only left a few inches.

 “You are—my best friend in the whole world, Jason.” Without even knowing it tears rolled down your cheeks. Jason sighed out as if he held the weight of the world on his chest.

 “You’re mine,” he confirmed. Dabbing at your eyes you looked up to meet his eyes only he wasn’t looking at you, his eyes were glued to the floor.

 “You mean everything to me. I’ve had time to think about so many things. I’ve gone over and over our entire story. Do you remember the day we met? I remember watching you on the waves, the way you easily glided through the water and commanded it like you owned it spoke volumes to me. It spoke about not only your convergence with the water but your spirit. You are strength. Everything you do showcases that strength.” Jason met your eyes for a few moments then dipped back down.

 “From day one, you’ve been my knight in shining armor. From day one, you’ve been my protector, my friend, the one person I trusted with everything. I don’t know if I ever thanked you for what you did on the beach that first night. Without you—thank you.”

 “You never have to thank me for anything Y/N. I would do anything for you—anything.”

 You felt it to be true. You reached out, took his hand and held on for dear life.

 “I love you; God knows I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone, more than I ever thought I could. Please tell me you know that.”

 Jason nodded, you could see the emotion behind his eyes, the emotion he was desperately trying to hold on to. You didn’t know if he really wanted to unbind himself or if he wanted to continue being restrained. You took a deep breath and fiddled with his fingers sliding yours along each of his before swirling a lazy pattern on the back of his hand.

 “I miss you.” It was another whisper, but he heard it. In seconds Jason faced you completely and cupped your cheeks in his massive hands.

 “I miss you too so fucking much. I go to call you at least thirty times a day. I still expect to see you around the corner wherever I am. I dream of you. I’m going insane. I miss my best friend.”

 You nodded because you knew just what he meant. You felt the same. The two of you just sat there filled with so many emotions but not speaking on any of them. You just gazed into each other’s eyes.

 “I’m scared.”

 “Of me?”

 “No. Never of you. I’m scared of this—of us.” Jason looked confused and you knew you had to explain it for him.

 “I’ve never loved like this before. there have been boyfriends before you, and situations but none of them are like you—are like us. I love you completely, I love you fully, I love you in a way that scares me, a way that says--.”

 “Soul mate,” Jason filled in while grazing his thumb across your cheekbone in a loving way. “Ulana,” Jason finished. You understood that word, the Hawaiian word for soulmate.

 “I feel it too, Y/N.”

 “I’m scared to lose you, to lose us, I know if that happens I won’t survive it. I won’t be able to just shake it off and move on—not from you Jason. We are such a hot and intense burn that it’s inevitable that we’ll burn out.”

 “I feel it too. I’ve never loved anyone; I can honestly say that to you right now. You are my first and I don’t ever want to lose you. Yes, we burn hot, yes we burn intense, yes we’re intense and it’s insane a little sometimes, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. You don’t have to survive me Y/N. I won’t ever hurt you again, I won’t ever be anything less than you deserve.”

 His words were pretty, you believed them. You believed them because you chose to, you believed them because the love you felt for him was stronger than your fear. You raised your hand to his cheek and softly caressed his bearded jaw.

 “I’m sorry I took so long. I thought it if I don’t make a choice in anything then it wouldn’t impact anything, that we could just go back.”

 “Is that what you want—to go back?” His eyes again filled with fear.

 “No. we couldn’t go back even if we tried. There would always be this pull between us. That won’t ever go away.”

 “I want to be with you Y/N. You and me.”

 More tears rolled down your cheek, “I want that too.” Jason released a relieved sigh then he pulled you into his arms into a strong but loving embrace, one that had you feeling every ounce of his love. The two of you just held each other and relished this moment, this first moment of togetherness.

 After several long minutes, the two of you pulled apart and rested your foreheads together.

 “I swear to you I will never—” You crushed your lips to his and allowed all your pent-up desires and feelings to come to the surface. The kiss was not a brief one, nor was it a chaste one. Your lips moved of their own accord with their own motive and right now it was to feel.

 Long minutes passed with the two of you wrestling for control, nibbling each other lips, rolling your tongues together and inching each of you closer and closer to the edge, closer to the point of no return. Your moans melded and competed, but it wasn’t a vicious competition it was a sensual one. Before long you’d reached your limit. You swung your leg over him and sat on his lap. Jason’s moan was the only welcome you needed.

 “Wait, wait,” Jason muttered as he pulled his lips from yours.

 “Why am I waiting? We’ve waited long enough—forty-two days.” You didn’t let the interruption stop you from kissing him or on him. Your lips connected with his neck and he groaned out his appreciation for the attention.

 “Are you sure? I don’t want you to rush this. Maybe we should--.”

 You were getting tired of his words. You wanted his mouth to be doing much better things. Pushing him back against the couch you took control once again expertly kissing him hoping to show him just how sure you were. When you kissed him, you tasted so much hope, so much love. You tasted everything you’d wanted for so long. It was all yours for the taking and you intended to take it all.

 You pulled his shirt higher than finally over his head to reveal his beautiful skin. After biting his bottom lip more forcefully than you intended you brought your lips lower to his neck and then across his collarbone. When you made it to his nipple you decided to tease him mercilessly. Slowly you swirled your tongue around it then nibbled. Like a moth to a flame, the reaction was instantaneous.

 “Jesus.” You forced back a smile and moved to his other nipple and mirrored the same actions. His hiss was more encouragement you were on the right path.

 As you continued your path down his body you slid to your knees before him. The look on his face screamed vulnerability.

 “I love you.” You smiled then quickly began undressing him, trying to free him. It had been way too long. Your hands moved quickly pulling at buttons and yanking down his stuck zipper. Your struggle had him joining in, in a collective effort to get him naked.

 The air around you immediately changed to a playfulness that you missed between you. When he’d gotten the zipper down and his jeans half off his hips he pulled you back to him and kissed you. Your lips danced and your tongues teased all the while he stood taking you with him. Jason’s big hands fell to your ass and cupped it fully filling them with the part of the female anatomy you knew he loved. Your moans melted into his mouth as he lifted you to wrap your legs around him. When your ankles locked you felt the sand that still clung to you.

 “Wait, wait.”

 “What? Do you want me to stop?”

 “Never. Just maybe we should take this somewhere else—somewhere a lot wetter.” At your suggestion, Jason’s eyebrows rose to give you a sultry look. Your smile widened and you nudged your head toward the bathroom.

 The two of you kissed your way to the bathroom all the while stripping off each piece of your clothes. What should have been a quick thirty-second trip went on much longer. Every time Jason squeezed your ass it triggered a moan and a reaction. A reaction that had you gripping him tighter with your legs and biting onto his lip. Every time you did that, he’d slam you into a wall pressing his growing hardness onto you. It was a repetitive cycle that only heightened the passion and arousal between the two of you.

 Jason was the first to get into the shower. You got lost just watching the water pour down onto him and over every slope of hardened muscle. He was built like a water God and you couldn’t wait to worship him.

 “Don’t just stand there, come here.”

 You didn’t need another invitation. Foreplay was Jason’s specialty. It was obvious. He was exceptionally good at it. If it wasn’t the way he touched you, it was the way he spoke to you. Words weren’t just words with him, it was poetry—love haikus. Every pet name, every whisper of love, every promise of devotion and faithfulness it all worked with how his body connected with yours. None of it was linear, he wasn’t linear. The duration of the fifteen-minute shower he’d barely done anything to your body that warned climax, but he’d still ripped four from you.

By the time Jason gently laid you onto his already tangled sheets both of you were more than ready for a reunion of epic proportions. You saw the question in his eyes as to why his room was in such a state of disarray. You’d give him the answer one day, you’d give him the answer to everything he wanted to know. You couldn’t run from what you felt for him any longer. It was pointless. You couldn’t suppress it or wish it away. It was here to stay, and you wanted to embrace it, wrap yourself in it completely and see where it led.

 “Make love to me Jason.”

 As soon as the words came out you felt the intrusion of his length slowly glide through you, connecting your bodies not for the first time but for the best time. The times before now didn’t matter because you were in unchartered territory. Everything from this coupling felt like the first time. As Jason rocked his hips to and fro you felt the steady tremors of an oncoming earthquake, an earthquake only he could unleash, an earthquake you both had denied yourselves for months.

 “I love you so fucking much, Y/N.” Your name was grunted out gruffly. His tightening clench on your hip signaled how close to losing control he was. You didn’t mind. You were his and he was yours.

 “Show me,” was your only response. It was all Jason needed. His hips snapped forward delivering a brutal thrust that had you shrieking out and digging your nails into his back. He didn’t wait for you to catch your breath, instead, he repeated the action over and over. Each thrust was more bruising than the last. Each thrust threatened to disrupt any balance within you. A disruption you welcomed.

 “Fuck me!” Jason pinned your hands to the bed and went to work. The words of the woman from the club earlier echoed back to you.

 “Whoever she is, is one lucky woman. He probably breaks her in half every night.”

 Unable to laugh through your moans of pleasure you squeezed his hand as your eyes rolled to the back of your head.

 “Mmm, yes Jason.”

 Jason’s lips met yours and there is where they remained. It felt like he was sucking the life from you while breathing a new one into you with one intent—to break you in two and weld you back together any way he deemed fit. You felt the earthquake break free and just like that your orgasm was the most powerful thing you;’d felt in months. Your body quivered as you came down but he was not finished with you.

 Jason splayed your legs apart and pressed them back to the mattress revealing you to his eyes and pinning you to perfect submission. It was a power move to show he was in control of not only your body but your pleasure and pain.

 “Do you love me?”

 “Yes,” you replied without hesitation. As a reward, Jason sunk his entire length into your heat. A loud gasp escaped you tempting you to break eye contact. When you did he withdrew from your body. Confusion riddled your features.

 “Keep those beautiful eyes on me.” As a tiny reward, he circled his hips allowing the tip of his need to circle your opening. He was teasing you.

 “Do you want me?”

 “Always.” He sank a few inches deeper then stopped.

 “Do you trust me?”

 “Without question.” An enamored look washed over him before he snapped his hips forward again filling you completely.

 “Oh my god.”

 The pressure was sublime, so sublime you came again. As you rode that wave Jason alternated the pace and depth of which he penetrated you. You were a whimpering, moaning mess. Everything he did felt incredible and everything you did only set him off more. When you gripped his beard and pulled him to you to bit onto his lips he ground his hips into you doing complete circles inside of you nudging every wall. That was when you came again. His grunts and groans became louder and more uncontrolled—he was close. You gripped him tightly and like clockwork, he collapsed over your body while trying to bury himself deeper and deeper.

 Jason’s movements became erratic as did his thrusts. His climax was steadily approaching, and he was bringing you with him. After a few thrusts, you both came together in a fury of shouts. You knew any neighbors you had probably hated you right now. You didn’t care.

 Slowly the two of you came down from your postcoital cocoon and everything felt new and different. Everything felt like a new beginning was right there for the taking, all the two of you had to do was reach out, pluck it and claim it for yourselves.

 “Y/N--,” Jason began.

 “Mmm.” The patterns he was tracing into your skin was working magic and quickly lulling you to sleep.

 “I promise you I will never hurt you again. I will love you as long as you let me, just be prepared it’s forever. There is no one else for me.” You rose your head to look at him. Everything in his eyes that spoke to you said he meant it with everything in him.

 “My love is forever, it is unconditional, I will never hurt you, or abandon you, you are my home and if you want I can be yours,” you whispered while never breaking eye contact. The emotion in him was clear.

 “You give me reason--,” Jason began.

 “For another day,” you finished.

 You felt it and you knew he felt it too. These words were as binding to the two of you as vows before a priest. They meant everything. They were promises to each other, for each other, with only each other as witnesses. They were meant only for your love.

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[jeranasblog]

You and me, forever

I can’t believe that this is my last Bingo OS. TY for all the feedback <3

Summary: Tony and Peter bond.

Rating: E

Notes: This story is my 15th @starkercestevent​ contribution and it’s better to read the other parts first. Kink for the 15th story: A/B/O. Click here for the Bingo Masterlist.

Warnings: Disgustingly fluffy; Adoptive Father/Adoptive Son, don’t like it, don’t read it; for further warnings check out Ao3

Read on Ao3

When Peter woke up the following morning, the memories came back slowly. He was equally excited and scared, excited that today was the day his Daddy would finally bond him, but also scared that he couldn’t leave the situation with Pierce behind. During the whole day when he had been kidnapped, Peter had been composed, looking for solutions and focusing on his Alpha. However, when the door of their bedroom had closed behind them, Peter had cried for hours, safely tugged in his Daddy’s arms. They had talked until dawn, Peter about how scared he had been and Tony about his guilt. In the end, the Omega had promised his Daddy to go to a therapist together, even if he thought he didn’t need it. His Daddy had called a specialist, considerate as he was, and next Monday, they would go to their first session. But before, they wanted to finally bond. 

 Tony was already awake when Peter finally opened his eyes, the bed empty but still warm. Peter smiled and closed his eyes again for a few seconds. He loved the domestic feeling, their bed still warm from Tony’s body heat and he could hear the Alpha rummaging around in the kitchen. This was what he had always wanted, and even though people had tried to take it away from him, Pierce and the media, today would finally be the day when his dream came true. 

 With a sigh, Peter pulled back the blanket and left the bed. He was dressed in nothing more but his Daddy’s boxers which he had thrown on yesterday at night. They were a little loose on his hips, showing off his hip bones and the curve of his ass. His hair was tousled, and he rubbed his eyes while he walked barefoot into the kitchen.

 Tony stood in front of the oven, wearing nothing but comfortable sweats and a tight t-shirt. He made pancakes; a huge pile was already done. Peter couldn’t stop himself from watching his Daddy’s muscular arms that were flexing with every move the Alpha made. He could feel how his mouth watered, partly from the delicious smell of the pancakes and partly because of his Daddy. He was the luckiest Omega in the entire world. 

 “Morning Daddy,” Peter nuzzled against his Alpha’s side and suppressed a whimper when his Daddy wrapped one of his strong arms around the Omega’s middle. Tony was the most handsome Alpha Peter had ever seen. 

 “Morning, baby.” Tony pressed a kiss on his forehead. “I’ve made pancakes. Grab two plates and coffee. I’ll take the rest.”

 Peter smiled at him and did as he was told. The table was already set otherwise, silverware, and a huge bouquet of roses in the middle. The Omega blushed. His Daddy was always spoiling him with little gifts, jewelry, clothes, or flowers, but he couldn’t get used to it. Every single gift made him feel special and he was grateful to belong to the Alpha.

 “I love you,” Peter said when his Daddy came in, carrying the pancakes. “More than anything in the world.” The smile he got in return was worth all the trouble he had endured during the last weeks. It felt right and when the Alpha said the three words back, Peter was sure he had never cherished what they had more than in this moment. 

 The pancakes weren’t that good. Sure, Peter had eaten one, but it had been too sweet, and he was afraid he would die of sugar-rush. Tony had spat his bite out, apologized three times and even though Peter had offered to make new ones, the Alpha refused and ordered delivery breakfast that arrived not even twenty minutes later. Money could really get you anything. 

 After breakfast, Peter tried to convince his Alpha to stay in bed. He had stripped off Tony’s boxers and presented enticingly, but everything he got out of it was his Daddy’s tongue in his dripping hole. No knot, and no mating bite. 

 “Later,” Tony promised with a sulking Peter on his lap. “I wanna make this special, baby.” After these words, Peter couldn’t even stay mad, so he pulled out some of his nicest clothes, tight jeans that emphasized the swell of his ass and a velvety crop top, and got ready to leave for whatever Tony had planned. 

 Tony took him out to the cinema first, although it wasn’t even noon. He had bought the entire cinema for the day, of course he had, so they could sit wherever they wanted, talk as loud as they wanted, and Peter even caught Tony throwing popcorn him. Sweet popcorn obviously. Tony had gotten his hands on a superhero movie that wasn’t even officially out yet and Peter spent two hours cuddling with his Alpha and sucking up every scene. He could be quite a nerd sometimes. 

 Later Tony took him out to lunch, a small restaurant that served real Italian pizza, Peter’s favorite. They spent the time laughing together and after one of the most delicious meals ever, they went for a little walk in Central Park until it started to get dark. Peter was thankful for every single moment and the feelings for his Alpha overwhelmed him, making him almost cry multiple times during the day.

 “That wasn’t everything, baby,” Tony promised after they had quietly walked through New York for half an hour. Peter was holding his hand, their fingers intertwined and the feeling of bubbling happiness in his stomach didn’t stop. “I have a last surprise for you.”

 Peter whimpered; a high-pitched Omega sound and he couldn’t say a single word. He followed his Daddy while his thoughts were spinning, overwhelmed by the day and his Alpha’s feelings.

 Tony led him to a tall office building that was already dark, a rare sight in the middle of New York City. The lobby was empty, so was every single floor they passed. His Daddy pressed the button of the elevator and to Peter’s surprise, JARVIS voice was answering and welcoming them in the building. 

 “JARVIS, top floor,” Tony commanded, and the elevator started to move. 

 “Have you bought the building?” Peter asked, curious about what his Alpha had planned.

 Tony laughed. “No, I’ve rented it, but I’ve got the permission to install JARVIS in the security system for the day.” Peter was impressed. What couldn’t his Daddy achieve?

 When the elevator stopped, Tony pulled him closer to his side, one arm wrapped around Peter’s shoulders. He felt protected and cared for, a fuzzy feeling that made him smile. The Alpha led him to a door opposite the elevator, and a cold breeze made Peter shiver when his Daddy opened the door. 

 “After you,” Tony held the door open like a real gentleman and Peter could feel a slight pull in his guts. The Alpha was perfect, and his Omega instincts made him preen under the attention. 

  If Peter had thought his Daddy had already put effort into planning the trip to the cinema and the lunch, it was nothing compared to this. They were standing in the middle of a roof, the lights of New York City all around them. Peter felt as if he was in a movie, discovering a secret place with his Alpha. 

 The entire rooftop was decorated with fairy lights and in the middle was a tiny pavilion with a see-through ceiling. Underneath, Tony had stacked blankets and pillows, building a blanket fort Peter has always dreamed about. It was decorated with lights as well and they were dancing around, almost looking like fireflies in the wilderness. 

 “It’s amazing,” Peter was awestruck and couldn’t do more than press himself against his Daddy. He could feel the first tear slip from his eyes and he buried his face against his Daddy’s chest. It was too much, too perfect, and couldn’t believe that this was his life. 

 “Come with me, baby,” Tony untangled Peter’s face from his shirt and placed one arm under Peter’s ass, before he lifted the Omega, forcing him to wrap his legs around the Alpha’s middle. Tony carried him over to the blanket fort while he whispered in his ear how much he loved him, what a perfect Omega he was. 

 Peter clutched to his Alpha, unwilling to ever let him go. He enjoyed being carried around, loved that his Alpha was so much stronger than him, that he could protect him and hold him down. Tony had shown just yesterday what a good Alpha he was, rescuing Peter within minutes. 

 When Tony lowered him onto the mattress that was hidden under the overwhelming amount of pillows, Peter whimpered a little. He wanted to be close to the Alpha, didn’t want him to pull back. But Tony chuckled slightly, turning on a heater on the other end of the pavilion. 

 “I don’t want you to get cold,” Tony explained and pulled back the blanket Peter was buried under to get closer to his Omega. “I love you, baby, and I want this day to be special.”

 “It is special already,” Peter assured him before he cuddled closer against his Daddy’s chest. It was perfect, lying here, surrounded by the scent of his Alpha. He had never known so certain that he wanted this forever, that he wanted Tony’s love and maybe someday even his kids. 

 They enjoyed the moment in silence, basking in each other’s presence, and savoring the quietness after the trouble of the last few weeks. Both of them deserved to relax and being on their own on a rooftop in New York City without anyone threatening them was everything Peter needed right now. 

 After some time had passed, Tony sat up again, leaving Peter for a few seconds to get some things. “Champaign?” Peter nodded and Tony offered him a glass. This was perfect, and the more Tony gave him, the better Peter knew that it was just his Daddy that he truly needed. 

 “I have another gift for you,” Tony confessed and pulled a small package out of his jacket. Peter smiled at his Alpha, taking the gift and started to unwrap it. 

 “I don’t have words for how much I love you, Daddy,” Peter said while his fingers were busy removing the wrapping paper. He could hear how his Alpha cleared his throat, touched by Peter’s words. When the Omega finally got rid of the wrapping paper, he held a small black box in his hand. His fingers trembled as he opened the lid, already guessing what was inside. 

 The box contained a ring, simple silver with a clear stone in the middle. Peter swallowed, tear running down his face and he looked up in his Alpha’s face. Tony looked nervous, his hands trembling as much as Peter’s, and the Omega could see how much courage it took for his Daddy to speak up.

 “Peter, you’re everything for me. My son, my love, my Omega. I want to get old with you by my side, as my husband, as my lover. I want to build a house with you, want to live the domestic dream with little kids around us. There’s no way I’ll ever deserve you, you’re so perfect and beautiful, but I promise I’ll try for my entire life. It doesn’t matter what others think, it doesn’t matter if I lose everything. The only important thing in my life is you, baby. Peter Stark, will you do me the honor and marry me.”

 Peter couldn’t do more than nod, he was full force sobbing by now. He had always wanted this, bonded and married, and Tony made both dreams come true in one night. His Daddy was smiling at him when he put the ring on the Omega’s finger and Peter had never seen him happier before. The Alpha pressed his lips against the Omega’s and Peter could taste champaign and a little salt from his tears. 

 They stayed quiet for a while, Peter sobbing in Tony’s arms, while he tried to get his feelings back under control. All his dreams were coming true in one day and his mind was flooded with love for his Daddy. Without the Alpha holding him right now, he would fall apart. 

 There shouldn’t be a way for Tony to top this, but once Peter had calmed down a little, he heard a whiz that was followed by a huge bang. He turned around in Tony’s arms, never once leaving the embrace, and looked up into the night. New York was brightened by a million lights, red, blue, green, dancing in the sky. 

 “Daddy, did you organize the fireworks?” Peter was turning his head to look the Alpha into the eyes again. Tony only smiled and nodded. 

 Suddenly, Peter felt a surge of heat bubbling in his body, a mixture of gratefulness, love, and arousal. The feelings were so intense that he pressed a hard kiss against his Daddy’s lips, their teeth clunking together before Peter calmed down a little and the kiss became softer.

 “You’re everything to me, Daddy,” Peter said while firework after firework was exploding behind them, lightening Tony’s face in all different colors. “There’s no way I’m ever going to leave you. I’d die for you, I’ll do everything to make you happy. I wanna be your Omega forever. Please, Alpha. Please, bond me.”

 Tony growled, wrapped his arms around Peter’s middle, and shifted them until Peter was lying on his back. The Alpha was towering over him, caging him in, a sign that he would protect Peter from everything. 

 “I still ask you for the last time, baby. Do you really want this?” The Alpha’s voice was already hoarse, but he held back, determined to make this perfect. 

 “Yes, Daddy. I want this. I want you to bond me and I want you to marry me.” The smile on Peter’s face was bright and so absolutely happy that the Alpha started smiling himself. 

 Peter laid back on the mattress and bared his throat for the Alpha to claim. It was thrilling and arousing to surrender the control to his Daddy, ready to be a part of the other man. Tony growled his usual possessive sound, but it was deeper today, filled with love and the knowledge that he would claim Peter for real. The Alpha came closer, his lips grazing his jaw, wandering lower until they were pressed against his claiming glands. But instead of the expected bite, Peter could only feel a soft suckle, that made his arousal spike. 

 Surge after surge of hot pleasure buzzed inside of him, making him squirm and whimper. He arched his back and pressed himself closer against his Daddy’s body. “Please, Daddy. Please, I need it. I need you.”

 Usually, Tony would answer with a chuckle. He would tease Peter even further, call him a needy slut and humiliate him until the Omega wouldn’t even know his own name anymore. But today, everything was softer, less of a game and more of a need for them to be together. 

 Tony stripped him with a fondness. He took off his clothes, admired the special set of red lingerie Peter had picked for today before he pulled it down as well. Then, he got rid of his own clothes until they were both naked, firm muscles pressed against soft skin. They were lying naked and newly engaged on a rooftop in New York, firework exploding around them and now his Daddy would finally claim him.

 The first finger that was pressed inside of him made Peter burn and he squirmed on the sheets. He could feel himself tearing up, desperate for what was about to come. Knowing that his Daddy would be so close soon, buried in his body and his heart, made him want a second finger immediately, but his Daddy controlled the pace. 

 Peter’s body slicked up, his hole dripping around the finger, and he ruined the mattress they were lying on. He became impatient, impatient for his Daddy’s cock, and his Daddy’s bite, but he didn’t want to ruin the moment with his neediness, so he forced himself to stay quiet. Thankfully, the Alpha had mercy and pushed a second finger inside. 

 Being filed up slowly was one of the best sensations and Peter savored the burn as much as the pleasure. Whimpers, begs and little cries left his lips, filling the pavilion and urging the Alpha on to take what the Omega offered. Tony was losing it as well, his carefully controlled pleasure taken over by the need to claim. The Alpha’s eyes sparkled, an expression so hungry that Peter’s eyes rolled back, and he bared his throat even further for the bite. 

 “Take me, Daddy,” Peter begged. “I wanna feel the stretch. I wanna feel you tomorrow.”

 It was a sign of how far gone the Alpha was that he didn’t protest. Instead, he placed the tip of his cock against Peter’s hole and pressed inside. The fit was tight, Peter’s body wasn't stretched enough to take his Daddy like this outside of a heat, but after a few seconds, he let him in, giving way inch by inch. 

 Even though it burned, Peter didn’t realize it anymore. His mind was filled with love, his body was filled with his Daddy and he knew it was only a matter of minutes until he would finally belong to Tony Stark, most eligible Alpha in the entire country. 

 “I love you so much, Daddy,” Peter sobbed when Tony had bottomed out, his entire body burning from the Alpha inside. He had never felt so close to his Daddy before, so close to his body and his mind. 

 The first thrusts didn’t even hurt anymore. Peter could feel the cock rubbing against his wall, grazing the sweet spot inside of him and making him see stars. Tony didn’t give him any time, he was already taking him as if he owned Peter, owned the Omega’s pleasure. The fast pace was a relief because there was no way Peter could wait for the bite much longer.

 They were trapped in their own world, a world in which only the two of them existed. Peter didn’t notice the fairy lights anymore, he didn’t even notice that the firework had stopped. He was caught up in his Daddy and each time his Daddy’s cock thrust against his sweet spot, Peter could feel himself coming closer to the edge. 

 “Now Daddy,” Peter begged, and he looked into his Daddy’s eyes. They were clouded, just like the Omega’s, and he could see all the love, all the adoration on Tony’s face.

 “Okay, baby,” Tony smiled at him and lowered his head until his lips were pressed against his glands again. “I love you. You’re mine. Forever.” And then he bit down. 

 It was nothing like Peter had expected. There was no pain, even though he could feel that his Daddy had drawn blood. Instead, it felt like floating. He had read about out-of-body experiences before and it felt exactly how people had described it online. His mind was leaving his body, entwining with Tony’s until Peter truly thought they were one. He could feel his Daddy, his love, and his arousal and before Tony even had the time to thrust again, Peter was coming. 

 He took Tony over the edge as well. Two orgasms buzzed through his body, both at the same time, and Peter sobbed to endure the feelings. His mind was filled with emotions that weren’t his, an overwhelming possessiveness, and a satisfied need to claim. Peter knew they were coming from his Daddy, but it didn’t change that he experienced them as his. 

  It took him a while until he was coming back to himself, his Daddy still linked to his mind, but it was bearable now. He could distinguish between his Daddy’s and his own feelings again, the overwhelming thought of owning someone only lingered in the back of his mind. The love of his Daddy dominated everything, and Peter finally knew for certain that his feelings were reciprocated in the same intensity. He wanted to tell his Daddy how much he loved him, how much he needed him, so he tried to press a part of his feelings towards the lingering presence in the back of his mind. 

 Tony, who was still caging him in, teared up suddenly, something Peter had never seen before. “This was right,” the Alpha decided, and the words made Peter feel warm inside. Tony had doubted them so much after the media blamed him for corrupting Peter and knowing that he didn’t regret their permanent bond was everything Peter had ever wanted. 

 Carefully, Tony turned them around until Peter was lying on his chest, his cock still buried inside of Peter. The Omega noticed during the movement that his Daddy had knotted him. He had been so overwhelmed that the pressure inside of him had been pushed into the back of his mind, but now that they had calmed down, he could savor the fullness again.

 “Let’s marry soon,” Tony said impulsively. “I don’t want to wait for years, and I don’t want to invite too many people. What do you think about Steve, Bucky, Pepper, Ned, and MJ?”

 Peter smiled at his lover, no, his fiancé and pressed a small kiss against his lips. “I’d love it, Daddy. People will judge anyway; I don’t want them to meddle with our relationship on our wedding day.”

 The Alpha chuckled in response and his hands wandered to Peter’s back. He held his Omega close, although they were still knotted, although they couldn’t part anyway. “We could have a small ceremony in a few weeks and fly somewhere warm after.”

 Peter’s eyes sparkled when he heard the suggestion. “Yes, Daddy. Please. I wanna go to the beach.”

 “Everything for you, baby. My Omega.” Peter preened under the words, knowing for certain they’re it for each other until death. 

 They stayed silent after the words, each of them thinking about their wedding day. The lights of New York were still dancing around them, and Peter observed the light of an airplane while he drowned in thoughts. 

 After a few minutes of content silence, Peter finally spoke up. “Daddy, what do you think about me not taking birth control anymore?”

 He had expected pondering or at least some concerns, but the only answer he got was a huge smile. “I’d love that, baby.” And suddenly the dream of marrying the perfect Alpha, finishing his studies and getting kids was closer than ever.