#and i am grateful! for living! for breathing and being! for having this beautiful chance to be human!

[mwebber]

frosh was also surprisingly pleasant idk i thought it’d be much more nervewracking but oh yeah. no yeah we’re gonna be just fine methinks

[yuujispinkhair]

CollegeBoy!Sukuna accidentally knocking you up – Part 2 B

-> Option B: "Let's have a baby!"

You can read Part 1 here.

I decided to write two different versions of Part 2 (both are comforting). Option A: The Reader has an abortion Option B: The Reader decides to have the baby(s).

Modern!Sukuna x Reader (female). Fluff + Smut. 18+. Light angst with a happy end. 7K words. Unplanned pregnancy, Reader decides to have the baby. There's a short moment of worry during the pregnancy, but nothing bad happens. Pregnancy sex, praise, slight lactation kink. All characters are of age. Minors don't interact. Divider@/plutism + dollsciples + benkeibear

The first night after finding out your college sweetheart accidentally knocked you up is a sleepless one for you. You're lying in Sukuna's arms, staring at the wall while your mind whirls, refusing to let you find any rest. You are grateful that Sukuna is here. At first, you had tried weakly to tell him that you wouldn't be mad if he needed some time to himself. But he just huffed and rolled his pretty eyes before pulling his t-shirt over his head and dropping it to the floor before his hands went to his jeans, unbuttoning them and pushing them down while telling you in that low, stern voice,

"You think I am going to leave you alone after this? Absolutely not. Now get your pretty ass into bed, princess. I am staying."

And now he is lying behind you, snoring softly against your neck after he, too, struggled to fall asleep for over an hour. And you can't help but snuggle against Sukuna's warm, muscular body. His presence is reassuring, and his strong body and soft breath on your neck stop you from spiraling, even though you still can't find any rest.

You are busy making a pro and con list in your mind. Could you really make it work if you decide to have the baby? Could you handle going to college and being a mom? Wouldn't an abortion be the more sensible thing to do? On the other hand, would you be ok with the what-ifs haunting you after deciding against the baby? It's the most challenging decision you've ever had to make.

But if you are honest with yourself, your heart already knows what it wants.

The idea of having your own little family with Sukuna makes you smile. The mental image of Sukuna going to class with your little one in a baby carrier won't leave your mind. And you tear up a little when you imagine how sweet a life like that could be.

But you try to give your head a chance, too. It's not hard to find reasons why you shouldn't have a baby at this stage of life. Yet, any argument that speaks against a baby also leads to an excuse as to why it can still work. And after all, you know you won't be alone. Because there is Sukuna. Sukuna, who didn't run when he found out he knocked you up. Sukuna who told you he will support you no matter what you decide. Sukuna, who told you he will make sure you and the baby have it good if you choose to have it.

And now, one of his large hands is resting on your belly, long fingers sprawling possessively and lovingly over it, and it's a touch that fills you with longing. It's a touch that makes you see a future in which you and Sukuna are young parents and live together in domestic bliss.

It's that thought that finally makes you drift off to sleep, too.

"Kuna?"

You gnaw on your lip nervously as you turn around in your boyfriend's arms and look at him, about to tell him your decision. Sleepy maroon eyes meet yours, and a lazy smirk spreads over Sukuna's tattooed face.

"Hmm?"

You always love how soft he looks right after waking up, with his pink hair ruffled and his voice even lower than usual, his gaze unguarded and warm. You reach down to take one of his large hands in yours, holding it with both of your smaller hands as you say the words that will change your and Sukuna's life forever,

"I think I want to have the baby."

It's, at the same time, the most terrifying and most beautiful thing you ever said. You gulp nervously, watching Sukuna's face carefully. He blinks, and the smirk vanishes from his face. Instead, he looks at you with a serious expression in his beautiful maroon eyes. He nods, never breaking eye contact as he says,

"Then we'll be a family from now on."

You still stare at him with wide eyes, clutching his hand tightly, and Sukuna laughs softly, leaning closer to nuzzle his nose against your forehead,

"Hey, don't look so worried, princess. I meant everything I said yesterday. Every word. I won't run. We'll make this work. You and our baby will have it good. I will make sure of that. I love you. I won't leave."

Your heart flutters at the reassurance, and when Sukuna wraps an arm around you, you snuggle against him gratefully, sighing softly as you push your face against his warm, buff chest. You can hear his too-fast heartbeat, which gives away how nervous Sukuna is, too. About the pregnancy and the prospect of being a dad at such a young age. But Sukuna doesn't show it. You know he is being strong for you, so he can be your safe place. It makes you press a tender kiss to one of the tattoos on his naked chest while mumbling a soft, "I love you, too."

You believe Sukuna when he says the two of you can make it work. You have a feeling that with Sukuna by your side, you can do anything.

You get an official pregnancy test done at your doctor's office only two days later, followed by the first ultrasound examination, which you come out of with ringing ears after your doctor beamed at you and congratulated you on a twin pregnancy.

You walk over to Sukuna, who is waiting for you in the waiting room and wordlessly press the ultrasound picture against his chest. You wait a few seconds, barely able to keep silent while Sukuna examines the small picture with narrowed eyes until he finally is like,

"What am I supposed to see here? Wait a moment...why are there two?"

And you burst out laughing, looking at him, unable to stop grinning as the realization settles over Sukuna's face, and the corners of his mouth twitch until he bursts out laughing too,

"I should have known! Of course, I knocked you up with twins!"

There's a certain pride in his voice, and it makes you laugh even more. The first shock of finding out that you will have not only one but two babies to look after is lessened by the humor of it all.

Sukuna brings the picture closer to his face,

"Those little peas are supposed to be my children? Did you see how fucking small they are? Well, little ones, you have a lot of growing to do if you want to be as big and strong as your daddy!"

You chuckle and hug him, overcome with emotions at hearing Sukuna talk like that, already so naturally slipping into the role of the soon-to-be daddy.

"I will probably not be able to move at all with your two huge, heavy babies in my belly. Why do you have to be so big, Kuna?"

Sukuna flashes you a proud grin while wrapping an arm around you and pulling you closer,

"Oh, don't act like you aren't crazily into it. And yeah, us Itadoris are big babies, so you better be prepared."

You open your mouth to whine, but Sukuna places a finger on your lips, smirking at you,

"Stop complaining, princess. You know that you have me. I'll make sure to feed you well when my brats make you hungry. And I'll get you everything you need. We both know that you won't have to lift a single finger."

You know he is right, and he already proves it to you when you get home again, and Sukuna gently pushes you onto the couch, telling you that you have to rest.

"I'm gonna make lunch now, and no, you aren't allowed to help! Be a good girl and just chill."

And so you sit there, with a hand lightly rubbing your belly, the ultrasound picture lying next to you, looking at the TV that is showing some game show. But you don't really register what is happening on the screen because you are too busy getting accustomed to the fact that you are really going to be a mom.

As the weeks pass, a small bump begins to show on your belly, and neither you nor Sukuna can stop touching it and staring at it in fascination. It still feels unreal that there are supposedly really two babies growing inside you. The little pea-sized spots you could see on the first ultrasound didn't look like little humans at all. But the small bulge tells you that there is truly something happening inside your belly.

You have several doctor's appointments, and Sukuna drives you to all of them. He always comes up with you to the waiting room and sits there, holding your hand, a reassuring presence by your side. He always lets you know he is there for you. That he isn't running from the responsibility.

Your doctor informs you that you can bring your partner with you to the next ultrasound so he can see the babies, too, if he wants, and when you tell Sukuna about it, he agrees immediately.

"Of course, I'm coming with you! I need to see what my brats are doing."

It makes your chest feel warm. Sukuna isn't just enduring all of this. He doesn't just play the dad because he feels like he has to. He is truly interested in your little family, which is growing in your belly.

You can tell that Sukuna is nervous on the day of the ultrasound. You catch him patting the pocket of his leather jacket as if to grab his cigarettes, only to let his hand drop again when he remembers that he threw all of his cigarettes away on the day you told him you wanted to have the babies.

It's cute to see your tall, muscular boyfriend with his piercings and intimidating-looking tattoos, sitting in the waiting room, playing nervously with his tongue piercing and grabbing your hand so tightly that it's a bit painful.

He is playing it cool in front of the doctor, though, his usual arrogant smirk perfectly in place. Joking around and oozing confidence. Until the screen fills with the ultrasound images, and Sukuna suddenly becomes completely silent.

The "peas" have grown quite a bit and they actually resemble tiny human beings with small arms and legs. Even though you can't feel it yet, they move around wildly, doing somersaults as if to show their daddy that they are just as athletic as he is.

You turn your head to look at Sukuna, and your heart clenches when you see the thunderstruck expression on his tattooed face. He stares at the screen in awe while his lips tremble ever so slightly.

You reach out to touch his arm, gently caressing his tattooed biceps, and Sukuna looks at you with his maroon eyes glittering suspiciously. Your bad boy who always acts so tough, but here he is fighting tears upon seeing his babies in action for the first time on a flickering ultrasound screen.

It makes tears well up in your eyes, too, your chest filling with almost overwhelming love. And suddenly, everything feels even more real. This is really happening! You are having Sukuna's babies! Sukuna and you will be parents!

And as if he read your mind, Sukuna's low voice is in your ear suddenly, sounding solemn and shocked and in complete awe,

"Those are our little brats."

You can only nod wildly in response as tears glitter in your eyes.

The two (or four) of you leave the doctor's office in a daze. Sukuna's arm is wrapped tightly around your waist, and you feel him pull you closer to his tall body anytime you walk past someone, protecting you from any possible danger. Sukuna even drives much slower than usual. It makes you smile to yourself, filled with love and gratitude for the man by your side.

The man who didn't run, the man who took responsibility, the man who turns to look at you at a red light with his eyes full of love.

Sukuna parks in front of your apartment and sprints to your side of the car to open the door for you and offer you a strong arm. He doesn't leave your side all the way to your apartment, making sure you won't fall on the stairs or slip in the hallway. And you can't help but grin to yourself. It makes your body buzz with excitement, knowing this tall, strong man is so protective over you and the babies that are growing in your belly. His babies.

Somehow, it makes Sukuna even more attractive, even though you never thought he could get any hotter than he already is. It makes you lean against him and smile toothily up at him once you enter your apartment. You put your hands on Sukuna's defined pecs, feeling him up through his thin t-shirt as you get on your tiptoes to kiss him sweetly. Murmuring against his lips,

"You're already such a good daddy."

Sukuna laughs and pulls you closer, smirking his sexy smirk against your lips before he pushes his tongue into your mouth, kissing you thoroughly before he carefully picks you up princess style to carry you to the bedroom and continue what you started.

"Oh my god, what!? I am going to be an uncle?"

You are convinced the whole dorm hears Yuuji's excited scream as he pulls his brother into a bone-crushing hug, and Sukuna's low laughter fills the room.

You smile as you watch the brothers high-fiving each other and grinning like two madmen. Sukuna announced the big news to Yuuji in his usually blunt manner. He pulled you against his side and put one large hand over your belly while smirking at his brother and telling him,

"You'll soon have serious competition for the title of Biggest Itadori Brat. We're pregnant with twins. Two boys, just like you and me."

By now, Yuuji has let go of his brother and comes over to you, smiling from ear to ear and telling you how happy he is for you and Sukuna. There is no sign of disapproval or judgment, only genuine joy. And it makes relief wash over you. You hope that more people will react nicely once your baby bump is big enough so you won't be able to hide your pregnancy anymore.

You once heard someone say that no pregnancy goes by without a big scare.

And you get your scare when you get up one morning to use the toilet only to discover a bloodstain in your panties.

"K... Kuna..."

You say his name instinctively, needing him by your side as the fear makes your pulse race. And Sukuna is by your side in lightspeed, running into the bathroom only wearing his boxer briefs, hair messy and ruffled from sleep, with wide eyes and worry written all over his handsome face.

"What's wrong, baby?"

Your voice trembles when you explain,

"There is... there is blood."

The first tears run down your cheeks as you press a hand over your mouth. You are scared out of your mind. Scared that this means you lost the babies. Scared that something went wrong, and now your happy little family will never be.

You almost scream at the irony. This pregnancy wasn't planned. Not so long ago, you contemplated getting an abortion. But now, the thought of losing your babies makes you spiral!

It's Sukuna's low voice that pulls you out of the panic attack.

"Don't worry too much, princess. It's not a lot of blood, ok? We'll get it checked. But I am sure it's nothing bad. Come here, sweetheart."

He gently pulls you into his arms, holding you tightly while his lips press little soothing kisses to your temple and cheek. So surprisingly soft for a guy with such a bad boy reputation.

You can tell by Sukuna's posture and the tenseness in his muscles that he is worried, too, but he stays strong for you, and that is exactly what you need at that moment. He is your big, strong boyfriend, someone you can lean on and who knows what to do because he always knows everything.

Sukuna is gentle with you. He helps you get dressed and carefully carries you down to his car. He talks to you on the whole drive to the hospital to distract you. He stays by your side when you are told to take a seat in the waiting area, holding your hand the whole time until a nurse picks you up and leads you to an examination room. The last thing you see before turning the corner is Sukuna's soft, reassuring smile, even while his wide gaze gives away how scared he is, too.

Ten minutes later, you return to Sukuna with a relieved smile on your lips. You can see the breath he lets out, the way the tenseness leaves his broad shoulders and the way his hands unclench.

"The babies are fine. They were as active as ever. The doctor said everything is as it should be. The bleeding could have been caused by all kinds of things, but it's nothing bad. I should just try to avoid stress and rest a bit more."

And Sukuna wraps you in his strong arms, hugging you a bit too tightly, clinging to you as you feel him exhale shakily.

"I'm glad the three of you are fine. Promise me you will really rest more."

"Of course I will. I want the babies, too, Kuna. I won't do anything that could put them at risk."

To your surprise, you feel Sukuna tense up again, and then he pulls away just enough to look at you with a scowl on his beautiful face and worry in his eyes,

"I am not just worried about the babies. I am worried about you, too. Always about you. Fuck, I love you. I need you to take good care of yourself. I can't lose you, princess!"

And you almost melt into a puddle right then and there, feeling tears well up in your eyes again, this time because you are so touched, and so relieved, and so in love with the boy in front of you.

"I love you too. Thank you for being there for me, baby."

"Always, princess."

Your belly is constantly growing, and by now, you aren't able to hide your pregnancy anymore. You get several curious glances on campus. Some people approach you directly. Others whisper when you walk past.

But those whispers stop the moment Sukuna joins your side, walking next to you like some bodyguard, one strong, tattooed arm casually thrown over your shoulder. He leans down to kiss your temple while his cat-like maroon eyes watch the people in the hallway, smirking his most dangerous smirk at them, daring them to make a mean comment and suffer the consequences.

Sukuna places one large hand on your swollen belly, sprawling his tattooed fingers possessively over it as he sneers at the group of girls who are known to be the biggest gossips of the whole campus,

"Those babies are mine. You can let everyone know that. And if anyone has a problem with it, they can come to me and say it to my face."

And you can't help but laugh and lift your head proudly, too, grinning from ear to ear, glad that you are dating the campus bad boy and won't have to endure any bullying because you managed to get knocked up by your college sweetheart. No one dares make any snide comments after finding out who the father of your babies is

You're sitting on the couch reading a book when there's a sudden movement in your belly. You gasp and stare at your baby bump.

"Oh my god, Kuna! Come quick!"

Your loud squeal is one of excitement this time, but there is still alarm written all over Sukuna's tattooed face when he hurries into the living room, cooking spoon still in his hand,

"Fuck! What's wrong?"

But you are quick to chase his worry away, meeting him halfway, walking toward him with a broad smile on your face and your hands cupping your swollen belly.

"It's the twins! I can feel them move! Come here so you can feel them, too!"

And Sukuna looks at you with wide eyes, dropping the spoon he was holding and rushing over to you. He stops in front of you, his gaze traveling down to your baby bump.

You laugh and grab his large hands, placing them firmly on your swollen belly. It takes barely a second, and then Sukuna's gaze snaps to yours,

"Our little brats are kicking me!"

You giggle and nod,

"Yeah, it's so cool, right? I just hope they won't get too wild."

And Sukuna grins and looks at you with an amused and super proud sparkle in his maroon eyes,

"Oh, I know they will be wild. Don't get your hopes up, princess. They are strong, just like their daddy. Right, my little gremlins?"

Sukuna's voice is amused but also tender, making your heart feel full. You know that he already loves his little ones. You can hear it in his voice and see it in the soft look on his face.

Sukuna drops to his knees right in front of you, hugging you and resting his head gently against your baby bump, a tender smile on his face.

A display of such pure devotion and love that it makes you tear up a bit. Sukuna grins as he pulls up your shirt, and then he presses two soft lingering kisses onto your swollen belly. You can feel his smile against your skin just a second before you feel another strong kick from one of the twins, or maybe both of them. As if they want to greet their daddy and show him how strong they already are.

Sukuna laughs, putting his hands on your belly again, grinning as he feels his sons move around,

"Hey, listen up, little brats. Daddy is proud of you for being such strong ones, but be nice to your mommy, ok? Don't kick her too much."

You chuckle and put a hand on Sukuna's head, gently petting his pink hair and running your fingers through the silky strands as you smile down at him. You are sure that you must have heart eyes because Sukuna looks so good kneeling before you, hugging you, and kissing your baby bump while talking to his babies in your belly.

Every last sliver of doubt you might have ever had about this pregnancy dissolves at that moment as you watch your man being so loving and cute. So excited about the development of your babies.

He grins up at you, that boyish grin that always gives you butterflies, and you catch yourself thinking that you really hope your little boys will have the same grin one day.

Of course, you heard about pregnancy cravings, but you couldn't imagine how intense that would be. Now you know it.

You're having a lazy evening on the couch, watching TV with Sukuna, when a commercial for a specific yogurt starts playing, and suddenly, it is all you can think about. You need that yogurt! Right now!

You whine about it like some five-year-old, and Sukuna laughs and pulls out his phone, filming you, telling you that he always wants to remember these epic moments of your pregnancy lunacy. And you huff dramatically and roll your eyes at him and hit his biceps playfully while pouting at him,

"But Kuna, please. You want your babies to become big and strong, right? I am sure they need dairy products right now, and that's why I crave that yogurt! It's them! It's your twins! They make me want that yogurt so bad! Please get it for me, baby, will you?"

You bat your lashes at him, and Sukuna grins at you, reaching out to cup your chin and gently press your cheeks together. His grin grows as he slowly leans closer.

"Stop it, princess. You already know full well that I will buy you that fucking yogurt. If my girl wants that yogurt, she will get that yogurt."

He presses a quick kiss to your pouty lips before he gets up from the couch and is on his way to the door. He looks over his broad shoulders, winking at you. And a second later, your boyfriend is already out the door on his mission to get you all the yogurt you crave.

He returns 20 minutes later, carrying a whole pallet of the desired yogurt, walking toward you with a proud expression on his handsome tattooed face.

"See, princess. You have me to get you everything you need. Now give me a kiss, and I will give you a yogurt."

Sukuna grins that beautiful boyish grin at you, his eyes filled with warmth and tenderness, and you laugh and grab his jaw, giving him a loud, wet smack on his tattooed cheek and then a sweet, slow kiss on his lips.

"Thank you, baby. You are the best."

And you feel him smile against your lips as his large hand cups the back of your head to hold you in place so he can kiss you some more before you can pull away to indulge in your newfound yogurt addiction.

You catch Sukuna standing in the twins' room in your new apartment, paintbrush in hand, his naked chest heaving, sweat mingling with the paint stains on his skin next to the tattoos adorning his muscular body. And it's one of the sexiest sights you have ever seen. Your man building a nest for your babies.

Money is tight, so you could only afford an old and rather shabby apartment. But Sukuna is very determined to turn it into a nice home for his little family. He told you that you don't need to hire any professional craftsmen. Sukuna will do it all by himself (and with the help of his brother). He will make sure you and your babies have a clean and pretty place to live in!

And he keeps his word.

Only a short time later, the apartment is ready to move into, and it looks amazing. A cozy little place for you and Sukuna and your little boys.

Living together with Sukuna feels incredibly nice. You have already been spending all your time together ever since you were pregnant, but knowing that you are actually living together now makes things feel different. Sweeter somehow. Domestic. Just like you dreamed it would be.

This is Sukuna's and your place. Your shared home. It is where you will raise your babies, where you will laugh and cry, eat together, make love, and celebrate the twins' birthdays.

Sukuna's favorite part of the apartment is the kitchen. He spends a lot of time in there, cooking and baking for you, claiming that he needs to feed you well so you get all the nutrients you need right now.

He is stern when it comes to your health, watching you with hawk eyes when you eat and shaking his head when you push some food to the side,

"Uh uh. I looked it up, princess. Those are essential during pregnancy. You will eat them."

As annoying as it can be, you can't be mad at Sukuna. He is just trying his best to take good care of you, after all. And in the end, you always hug him and kiss him and tell him he is the sweetest, which makes Sukuna look very pleased while he announces,

"My girl will always have it good with me."

He is right, and you are very happy about it. Sukuna is super protective of you, even more so now that you are pregnant with his babies. He doesn't let you lift a single finger, insisting that you aren't to carry anything heavy and that you shouldn't do the laundry or clean the apartment.

You laugh when you come home from class and find Sukuna and Yuuji deep cleaning the kitchen together, both sweaty and bitching at each other but motivated like hell to get everything shiny and clean.

"Brat, you missed a spot there! Get your lazy ass up and keep scrubbing my fucking sink! This is for your nephews, you little shit! You don't want them to get all kinds of infections, do you?"

"No, of course not! But Kuna! Grandpa never had a clean house, and you and I lived too! You are such an asshole, oh my god!"

You clap a hand over your mouth to stifle your laughter, feeling bad for Yuuji but also filled with love at seeing Sukuna so aggressively motivated about your domestic life. So eager to prepare everything for the twins.

Sukuna is a good man for you. Tough on the outside but caring on the inside. And you already know that he will be a wonderful father.

Your pregnancy progresses without any complications. But you are not immune to the emotional rollercoaster of the pregnancy hormones raging in your body. You cry more easily, sometimes without even really knowing why. You get anxious over the smallest things. And sometimes, everything is too much, and self-doubts fill your mind.

It's those moments that make you suddenly cry and hug yourself, unable to regulate your emotions, hiccuping from all the tears,

"I can't do this! I have no idea how any of this works! I suck at everything I do! I will be such a terrible mom!"

But Sukuna is there for you each and every time, catching you anytime you fall. He wraps you in his strong arms, comforts you, pulls you against his muscular body, and lets you use his broad chest as your pillow, not caring at all that your tears and snot soak his t-shirt. He strokes your hair soothingly, cuddles you, and talks to you in that low, velvety voice. All soft and sweet, murmuring reassurance to you while he pets your hair,

"Shhh, it's ok, baby. You can do it. You'll be an amazing mommy. And even on the days when you can't do it, there will still be me who can do it for you. I won't let you down, ever. You aren't alone in this, princess. You will always have me."

It makes you cry even more. But the tears turn into tears of joy, affection, and love. Sukuna is your rock. To everyone else, he may seem like a superficial troublemaker who only wants to have fun, but you know a different side of him. The accidental pregnancy showed you that Sukuna is so much more than meets the eye. You know you can always count on your bad boy with the face tattoos and the pink hair. You know he will keep his word.

You snuggle gratefully against him in those moments, crying until you fall asleep on his chest, feeling safe and loved and knowing that when you wake up a few hours later, things will look better again.

You talk to your doctor and schedule a planned c-section after seeing how big the twins are already at this point, making you freak out at the thought of trying a natural birth.

Your doctor laughs and tells you that it's no wonder they are big after seeing their daddy, and somehow, it gives you butterflies and makes you smile like an idiot, even as you nod and agree that, yes, Sukuna is really tall and big.

When you tell Sukuna the news, he is, on the one hand, proud that his brats are growing so healthily and seem to turn out just like him, but on the other hand, he is worried about you.

"I will be with you during the c-section. You better know that, princess."

"Of course, I know that, baby. But I am ok, really. I am not scared of the surgery. I am actually glad I don't have to try pressing those big boys out the natural way!"

You look at Sukuna, and his lips twitch, and then you both burst out laughing at the same time before he pulls you against him and hugs you loosely, careful not to squish your swollen belly too much.

Your baby bump is huge by now. You can't see your feet. You can't bend over. You can't move the way you want to. Your belly is heavy and in the way all the time now, and it's a bit annoying at this point.

But Sukuna always manages to make you feel better about it.

He constantly walks up to you, stands behind you, and reaches around you, cupping your swollen belly with both hands, joking about how it is exactly like the basketball he is used to from practice, only prettier.

And you laugh and complain playfully and turn around in his arms, kissing him while still smiling. And he smirks at you and informs you,

"I told you that you have me to take care of you, princess. Stop whining, and just come to me when you need help. It's really that easy."

He is right.

You tell Sukuna you are having trouble putting on your shoes, and Sukuna is instantly by your side. He makes you sit down again, takes your legs into his hands, puts your shoes on for you, and ties the shoelaces.

He is there when you need to pick up something. He is there to do the laundry for you and carry groceries and even your bag when he walks you to your classes. He is there to remind you that you should lie down and rest. And if you don't listen to him, Sukuna can still easily pick you up and just carry you to the bed or couch.

And as much as you are starting to get annoyed by your baby bump and your heavy breasts and swollen face and legs, Sukuna absolutely loves your pregnant body.

There are moments when you are close to tears and feel insecure about your new body shape, missing the way you used to look before, but Sukuna won't let you talk yourself down. He leaves no doubt about how attracted he is to you.

"Stop it, baby. You are so fucking sexy. You think you don't make my dick hard anymore? I'll show you how wrong you are about that, princess."

He walks up to you, making you gulp hard when you feel him stop behind you, his husky voice in your ear, hot breath on your neck sending shivers down your spine.

He presses his tall body against you while his large hands wander lovingly over your body, cupping your plump breasts, caressing your swollen belly, squeezing your squishy hips and thighs while hot, wet kisses trail up and down your neck and Sukuna rubs his rock-hard erection against your back, letting you feel how hard you still make him.

"If you weren't already round and swollen with my twins, I would fuck a baby into you right this second. But just because I can't knock you up again right now doesn't mean I can't fuck you."

Sukuna is careful to put you in positions that are comfortable for you and won't hurt the babies. And his thrusts are a bit gentler than usual, but his hips still roll against you with that perfect, sexy pace, dicking you down so good that it makes you sob his name and forget all about the insecurities you felt earlier.

You are lying on your side, and Sukuna is spooning you, fucking you from behind with those slow, deep strokes that make your head spin. His strong arms are wrapped tightly around your body, his hands squeezing your breasts, and he growls in your ear when a few droplets of milk already spill from your swollen tits.

You mewl when Sukuna doesn't wipe his hands on the sheets but licks your sticky milk off his fingers, groaning as if it's a sweet treat, telling you how good you taste.

He flicks his thumb over your puffy clit, making you scream with how good and intense everything feels with the pregnancy hormones and the increased blood flow in your body. Forgetting all about the insecurities you felt earlier as you give yourself to Sukuna and let him worship your pregnant body.

One of his hands is holding your swollen belly, while the other is between your thighs, spoiling your pussy with his loving caresses. And all the time, he praises you with that low, sexy voice, telling you how crazy you drive him.

You squeal loudly when your pleasure peaks, and you clench so hard around Sukuna's cock, that you take him with you over the edge, making him groan loudly against your neck while his large hands sprawl over your pregnant belly, holding it firmly as he ruts into you and spills his hot cum into you.

Sukuna is always sweet to you after sex, but even more so now that you are pregnant. You get cleaned, you get cuddled, you get praised, you get offered snacks, which makes you laugh softly and pull Sukuna into a deep kiss, telling him that the only snack you want right now is him.

All of this helps you accept the changes in your body and even appreciate them. Sukuna makes you feel desired and sexy, even when your legs and face are swollen, and your big baby bump makes it impossible for you to move the way you used to.

Sukuna loves your baby bump.

And not just during sex but all the time. He can't keep his hands off it. A large tattooed hand always rests on your swollen belly when you snuggle on the couch together, watching your favorite shows. Or at night, when you lie in bed, and Sukuna hugs you from behind. He even does it in public, proudly showing you and your baby bump off.

It makes you smile, thinking that just a few months ago, you and Sukuna were both freaking out about him accidentally knocking you up, but now you are both so at peace with how things are. Even happy and excited to share this new chapter of your life with each other.

You are standing in the baby room section of Ikea three weeks before your due date, a hand resting gently on your swollen belly, smiling when you feel your babies' occasional kicks.

Their daddy is busy picking out a changing table while looking completely out of place with his black clothes and intimidating-looking tattoos amidst all the white and pastel-colored furniture surrounding him.

He is sticking his tongue out in concentration, his tongue piercing glittering in the artificial light as he takes measurements with a measuring tape to determine which changing table fits better into the kid's room. And your chest fills with warmth as you watch him.

He is so focused, so invested. This is important to him. Your babies are important to him. You are important to him.

Before you even know it, you are standing behind Sukuna and wrap your arms around him, hugging him and snuggling against his broad back, at least as much as your huge baby bump allows.

Sukuna looks over his shoulder with that boyish grin on his tattooed face, looking so good that the sensation of your babies kicking you isn't the only fluttery feeling in your stomach.

"Do you want the blue changing mat or the yellow one, princess?"

You chuckle, unable to stop the broad smile spreading over your face,

"You are so sexy, daddy."

Sukuna's smirk grows bigger, and he lifts one eyebrow,

"You think this is sexy? Just wait until you see me giving our brats the bottle or changing their diapers."

"I'll probably faint from all the sexiness!"

You both start laughing at the same time. And Sukuna turns around to steal a few kisses before he wraps his strong arms around you and tells you about all the sexy dad things he will do when his brats are here.

And you both laugh as you stand there hugging and joking and flirting in the middle of Ikea, feeling as if you are in your own little bubble. And you kind of are, aren't you? This is your little family. Sukuna and you and the babies in your swollen belly.

And you realize that you can't wait for the little ones to finally be here. You can't wait to finally see Sukuna holding them, carrying them around in his tattooed arms, hearing him sing them to sleep with that sexy low voice, and seeing him be the proud daddy that you know he will be.

I WANT THAT SEXY DADDY IN MY LIFE AAAHHH 😭💗 This story became so much longer than I thought, but I just couldn't stop writing. I found so much comfort in this whole series. Our fave bad boy becoming all mature and responsible 💗

I hope you enjoyed Option B and that it could make you smile, too!! Thank you so much for all the sweet comments and tags on Part 1 and Option A. It was such a nice journey with y'all!!

Comments and reblogs would be very sweet 💗

[aringofsalt]

💗 for bucktommy!

💗 - slow/gentle kiss

this got away from me a little bit but it is SO CUTE i just made my own heart hurt

The garden was beautiful.

One year on, Maddie and Chimney had decided on a quiet, intimate anniversary party. Close friends and family only, none of the over-exaggerated pomp that the Buckleys had encouraged the year before. The evening was winding down, most of the adults sitting around in the garden, under a sky painted in pinks and purples and dotted with string lights. The gaggle of kids who had been underfoot the whole day were now mostly tucked away in the living room, entertaining themselves with video games and snacks.

There were still a few people dancing in the open section of the courtyard they’d set up, but Tommy and Evan were tucked away on a bench off to the side, wrapped around each other. Evan, already happy and emotional for his sister, had only gotten sappier as the night—and the drinks—wore on, constantly reminded that this day had been a bit of a turning point not just for his sister and her husband, but for him and Tommy as well. They’d put up with more than a few teasing comments about their appearance from last year—Maddie’s friend Josh had straight up asked why both their faces were clean this time—but it had all been good-natured, and they were both feeling the love regardless.

The music changed, a few slower notes ringing out, and Tommy was surprised to recognise Norah Jones’ voice, one of his favourite songs from his favourite movie. He hadn’t really pegged Maddie as a fan, but maybe Howie had added it. Regardless, Evan was standing and holding out his hand, a soft smile on his face, and he rarely said no to that face.

Evan pulled him into the center of the floor, joining the other couples that had migrated over. They swayed together for a moment, and Tommy tipped his head forward to lean their foreheads together, enjoying the feeling of Evan’s arms around his shoulders and his own hands on Evan’s waist.

“Have I told you recently how glad I am that you agreed to my ridiculous attempt at a second date?” Evan murmured.

“You know, I think you last said it about an hour ago, so not recently enough,” Tommy teased. “And, really, it was the most eventful second date I could’ve asked for.”

“Good thing we like eventful.”

Evan pulled back a little, grabbing Tommy’s hands and spinning him around a few times just to see him laugh. When they settled again, Evan was pressed up behind him, arms wrapped tightly around his waist.

“I love you so much.”

Tommy opened his mouth to respond, but paused when Evan pulled away. He turned, confused, then even more confused when Evan’s face wasn’t where he expected it to be.

And then he looked down.

To where his boyfriend was kneeling, smile as bright as the setting sun, with a little black velvet box open on his outstretched hand, a thin band of hammered silver sitting in the middle.

“I know it’s fast, and we only just moved in together,” he began, “but I also know that for the last year I’ve spent every day being grateful for you. That you let me figure myself out and still gave me a chance to love you the way you deserve.” He held out his free hand and Tommy took it gratefully, almost desperate for the lifeline. “I know I love you, and I know you love me,” Evan continued, his smile dropping into a more serious expression. “And I want to love you for the rest of my life, if you’ll have me.”

“Evan,” Tommy breathed, “of course.”

Evan’s smile returned, almost blinding, and he all but threw the box to the ground in his haste to slide the ring onto Tommy’s finger. Their friends were cheering and clapping around them, but Tommy barely heard them, focused on the way Evan pressed a slow, gentle kiss to each of his knuckles before rising to his feet. He was barely upright before Tommy was taking his face in his hands and kissing him deeply. They broke apart to the sounds of wolf whistles, and it was then he realised that everyone was now gathered around them.

“Told you he’d say yes,” Evan gloated to Eddie and Hen, who both rolled their eyes at him.

“Nobody doubted that for a second, asshole,” Eddie said fondly.

“Sorry for stealing your thunder, again,” Tommy told Maddie with a rueful smile as she hugged him.

“Oh, are you kidding? I told him he had to do this as soon as he told me he was thinking about asking you,” she said with a laugh. “I told him he had to invite you to the wedding, too. I’m taking like, seventy-five percent of the credit for your relationship, by the way. He needs a kick in the ass sometimes.”

“Hey!”

—

Later that evening, once the congratulations were done and they’d had one last celebratory glass of champagne, Tommy had a sleepy Evan tucked under his arm as they waited for their Uber home.

“So, uh, is now a good time to tell you I have something for you hidden in the back of my tea drawer?”

—

this is the song they dance to btw! i have never seen love actually but i wanted to use a song from the soundtrack and i think this one is pretty sweet. buck absolutely asked maddie to put this on their little party playlist for him when they planned this.

[spookyghostbunny]

Spspspsp come get your lee!Caine

It's not surprising that the circus performers occasionally have their off days. Even Caine, the usually lively ringmaster, had them

However, those days were far and few between.

Today just so happens to be one of those days.

Caine didn't understand why he felt so blue. The sun was shining, the stars were sparkling, and the digital flowers were in full bloom. There was even a gentle breeze that passed through THE GROUNDS, making it a perfect day to be outside.

Despite the beautiful day outside, inside THE TENT was a different story. The circus performers quickly noticed their ringmaster's unusual behavior. They were all frantically telling jokes and performing tricks, trying to bring Caine's frown back to its signature smile.

Everything they tried had failed.

Caine sighs as he floats back to his room. He was grateful for his performers trying to help, but now he just wanted to be alone. He couldn't shake this weird feeling. Overwhelmed? Is that the right word? He sighed again and sat down on his bed, staring off at the wall in thought.

Will he ever feel better?

"What's got ya so down in the dumps, boss?" Caine jumps at hearing the familiar voice of his assistant.

Bubble floated in front of him, looking curious. It's not every day his friend looks this upset.

"I'm not quite sure, dear Bubble. I believe I am experiencing one of those days that Ragatha refers to as 'bad days.' I wasn't sure what that meant, but now I'm starting to understand," Caine explains, unconsciously fidgeting with his hands.

Bubble cooed in sympathy. He was feeling a little useless in this situation. He wanted to help his friend, but he was only a sphere with eyes and a mouth. What could he do?

The sentient bubble drifted towards Caine, attempting a few affectionate nuzzles.

What happened next was something Bubble would never let Caine live down.

The ringmaster let out a soft gasp before being consumed by giggles.

The two were equally taken back by Caine's strange reaction. "What was that?" Bubble asked, lifting an eyebrow.

Caine stuttered, appearing uncharacteristically flustered. "N-Nothing!"

It didn't take long for Bubble to realize what had happened. A mischievous smirk formed on his toothy mouth.

He figured out a way to help his friend.

Caine rapidly leaps off the bed and backs away from Bubble. "N-now, Bubble! Don't you try any funny business! I- um- feel better already! Yeah! Hey, I think I heard Pomni calling me! I should-"

Before Caine has the chance to retreat, Bubble unleashes his attack, aiming at Caine's tummy.

Caine squeals, bursting into goofy laughter from the ticklish nuzzles. "Buhuhubble!"

"I didn't know you were ticklish, Caine! This is such great news!" Bubble chirps, not realizing that his talking made the tickly feeling worse.

Caine squeals again, attempting to push away his assistant.

For a bubble, Bubble was surprisingly strong.

It was a funny sight for sure! The floating mouth's jaw almost touched the floor from how hard he was laughing, and he was wiggling this way and that! If only Bubble had a camera with him.

As Caine grew weaker, he gradually descended to the floor. "Hahaha St-stohohop thihis! Yohohou parasite!!"

Bubble gasps in fake offense. "You're in for it now," he growls.

Caine instantly knew he [insert silly noise here] up.

Bubble took a deep breath (it was mostly for show since he didn't need to breathe) and blew a raspberry on Caine's poor stomach.

Caine shrieked, attempting to curl up and escape the madding tingles that rippled through his body. This is so weird! He has never been on the receiving end of a raspberry before! This must be what the others felt when he gave them one.

It was kind of fun!

"IHIHI'M S-SOHOHORRHEHEHE!"

"Hmm... I don't know. You don't look sorry to me!" Bubble teased, having to hold back his own laughter. He was having a blast! He took another mock deep breath, delivering a raspberry to Caine's side.

This went on until Bubble saw that Caine was close to his limit. He stops and moves so he was sitting beside Caine. "Feelin any better, boss?" Bubble asks, hoping he didn't take it too far.

Caine took a minute to calm down. His digital nerves still felt the tingles shooting through them. When the phantom tickles finally went away, he shoots back up into the air and does a dramatic twirl.

"Yep! I'm feeling like my old self again! In fact..." He glaces at the door, his voice taking on a playfully darker tone. "I would like to repay our guests for their help."

"SCATTER!" They heard Jax yell outside the door. They both chuckle as they hear the performers take off in different directions.

Bubble was ready for round two.

[doing-swell]

hello, my name's swellie 💖✨🌈 aka: new pinned post! new pinned post! read all abt it!

welcome to my blog! I started on here almost exactly a year ago, and since then I've learned not only so much about my pregnancy kink, but also about myself. being here has been formative for my kink exploration journey, and it's helped me deconstruct years of catholic school girl trauma (s/o to catholic guilt!).

This is a pregnancy and birth fetish vlog. This is an 18+ only environment. DO NOT INTERACT IF 18 OR YOUNGER. I am a 27 year old white cis woman with brown hair. I identify as a neurodivergent bisexual woman on the ace-spectrum. I live in the US - New England specifically!

I've had a pregnancy kink since I was a kid. I even got in trouble for google image searching "pregnat" on my childhood computer lol (it was 2006 folks, what else was i supposed to do?) I created this blog to share the beautiful side of this kink. I hope you enjoy! <3

Keep reading below!

As a queer person I will absolutely not condone any form of homophobia, transphobia, racism, misogyny, etc etc. I am an open and tolerant person, and please do not try to take advantage of me because of this. I mostly only follow back people whose content I enjoy seeing.

When I interact with kink content here, I mostly imagine myself as the pregnant carrier. I mostly get off to picturing myself in some sort of pain (i.e. labor) or I like to picture myself with a pregnant person.

Things I really enjoy:

Wearing a fake pregnant belly

Pregnant bellies (specifically, large pregnant bellies, smaller bellies, those with stretch marks, red bellies, moving bellies)

Breeding <3

Impregnation <3

Poking pregnant bellies, rubbing them etc

Stirrups, medical torture stuff, etc (FANTASY ONLY. I CANNOT REPEAT THAT ENOUGH. DO NOT INTERACT WITH ME IF YOU FEEL OTHERWISE)

Birth, birth denial, labor and contractions

Pregnant lesbians (because duh,,, I’m fucking gay)

Historical pregnancies or pregnancies set in the past

Clothes not being able to fit/spilling out of old clothes

Giant swollen boobs (especially with veins 🙈)

Giant bellies in laps <3

Waddling and being out of breathe, struggling to sit up, contractions, unable to get up from sitting, etc

Curves🤤🤤

I’m not into:

Anime/ drawings

Monster fucking, slime, pups/litter talk, etc

Mpreg

Beastiality, aliens, monsters, anything sci fi

Eggs or pushing out objects

Feederism, feedies, or stuffing (in very very specific circumstances I tolerate this)

Anything to do with fatphobia or shaming folks for their size/weight

Swollen feet

It gets weird when it gets misogonistic in a "I would actually vote to overturn roe v wade if I had the chance" kind of thing -- if it's fantasy/pure imagination, I'm all ears. But when I think you would actually hate crime me IRL..... that's when I [not-so] politely decline ❤️🫶🏻

Other disclaimers:

I am in a relationship right now and she knows about this blog and my kink. She is so supportive and I love her very much. We are very open to exploring ourselves sexually, but never, and I mean never, would I risk my relationship because of something on here. If you cross a line, I will immediately tell you. Please do not assume I want to fuck you or be in a relationship with you in real life, this is purely for kink purposes. I think of you as my friends! If I talk to you, or respond to your DM's or like your content occasionally, that means I'm grateful to have you in my life and you make my life better by being in it. Xoxo, thank you for understanding!

Please send me asks, tell me about your fantasies, ask me questions about my fetish. I want to learn more about you as well! I’m an open book when it comes to most things, I promise I won’t judge you 🙈

I don’t want to tell you my real name, where I live, or anything about me in real life. You won’t ever see my face. It’s what I’m comfortable with, full stop. If you do get my name or anything from me, it’s for you only. Do not share that without my consent. For purposes of this blog, you can call me Swellie 🤪

I love interacting with mutuals through tags and captions 💋 it’s my way of flirting and will swoon if you do the same

Happy swelling, babies 🫡

[eatmangoesnekkid]

Forgive yourself for the rough relationship you have had with your body over the years. The relationship we had with our bodies growing up is the prime reason it takes a lot for us to learn to trust ourselves again. There is so much unlearning we have to be willing to do. When I was younger, I loved to read and prided myself off being a good thinker. If I could have bypassed my body into enlightenment in high school, I would have done it because the last thing I cared about doing was feeling--deeply feeling and hated being called a “cry baby” when I was much younger. I had a sharp analytical mind and was on the math and debate teams in middle and high school and graduated with 3 Bachelor degrees-accounting, biology, and chemistry. I couldn't decide what subject I liked the most and decided to major in them all over a 6 year period. I am grateful that I came across this path of love and way of beauty and opening/expansion in my late 20s because it is truly the purest form of energy. I am thankful that I could reclaim the lost parts of me that brought me back to my soul, alongside strength and flexibility, and is aging me well. It's often the very subtle violence and abuse we normalize with our female bodies, like living mostly in our heads, that creates the most harm overtime. Doctors won't tell us that because they honestly do not know the deeper mysteries or practicalities of being female. We know the obvious ways we harm ourselves (our cells), like when being intimate with the wrong people or drinking too much, but we often miss the more subtle, culturally-acceptable ways encouraged by society and how we learn to socialize together. Sugar used to be my baby, my drug of choice. I used to keep cookies and candy near my bed at night and snack while watching television. I would sweetened everything-toast, cereals, teas, and enjoyed plenty of cakes, pies, and other sugary items. I loved pretty, well-made, high-quality, sugary pasteries from the fancy artisanal bakery as well. But after some years, too much sugar ages you faster than what is necessary. Because sugar, refined sugar, even too much sugar alternatives like agave or coconut sugar, processes as a stimulant or drug to the body. Even white carbohydrate foods like potatoes, rice, white bread, etc. turn into sugar once digested. And most people eat a load of carbs and dessert afterwards on a regular basis, which increases their chance of chronic pain, especially as they get older. Too many carbs or sugar actually represses your body and decreases your female libido. There are a few exceptions to people who can eat more carbs, such as long-distance runners, high-intensity athletes or very thin people with high metabolic rates, and the like. Think about how your body feels after you have had incredible sex with a lover. Mm. The very act of healthy lovemaking is deeply warming, grounding, and relaxing. It is extremely embodying to center this feeling and impulse, this grounded rooted core, in your life, even when you are not making love. If you practice this, it will positively impact every area of your life. Reclaim the beauty of your body just for your own love and care, and not simply for the public gaze and consumption. Breathe life back into your body by limiting or greatly reducing your sugar consumption and get into autophagy, which cleanses your cells and tissues and radiates your light. Move your energy out of your head a little more often and discover ways to stay in your body from the neck down. And witness the differences in how you feel and emanate overtime. You will find yourself becoming a new you! Ask me how I know. --India Ame'ye, The Melody Of Love

[tulip-fiction]

Dang it. I was actually doing better about not obsessing over Begins ≠ Youth, but then I was listening to Angel pt. 2 (over and over again on repeat because that’s what I do when I get a song stuck in my head) and the lyrics kept making me think about Cein and Jeha. I didn’t want to write another sad scene inspired by Begins ≠ Youth, but I couldn’t help it. These freaking characters and their tragic stories just won’t let me go.

Fan Fiction

Content warning: Begins ≠ Youth damage, if you know you know, if you don’t, don’t read.

Breaking Beautiful Things - Begins ≠ Youth

Cein placed the last photo into the fire. He watched it all burn away to nothing. It seemed fitting to burn it all here, in the home he had once shared with his mother. He would let it all go. Maybe leaving was exactly what he needed. Maybe his wounds could heal if he stopped picking at this scab.

Cein sat there until the flames had died and the ashes cooled. It was time to say goodbye. Goodbye to this place and all the pain it held for him.

The floor creaked and Cein spun to find Jeha entering. “Hyung, I finally found you.”

Cein turned his back to Jeha. “Leave,” he commanded sternly.

“You wouldn’t answer my calls or messages,” Jeha continued, ignoring Cein’s order.

“Then I will leave,” Cein turned toward the door.

Jeha stepped between Cein and the door. “You would leave without saying goodbye?” Jeha asked, the pain clear in his voice. But Cein would not meet his eyes and just stepped around him.

“Wait!” Jeha pleaded, falling to his knees and resting his forehead against the charred floor in a bow, words flooding from his mouth, “I know you are angry with me. It’s all my fault that you are being transferred. But please,” Jeha begged, “give me a chance fix this. I’ll tell them what really happened.”

“What really happened?” Cein repeated bitterly, spinning to face Jeha. “What really happened Jeha? I hit you. With a brick. That’s what really happened.”

“But it was my fault,” Jeha protested, raising his head to look up at Cein, tears streaming down his cheeks. “It was my fault you were here. My fault Mingook went after you.”

“I hit you Jeha! That blood,” Cein yelled, pointing at the stain they both refused to look at, “that is there because of me!”

“But you didn’t mean to hit me! That was my fault too! Not yours! You were going to hit Mingook, but I got in the way. He thinks I did it to protect him. Thinks I care for him and he’s indebted to me,” Jeha laughed hysterically, tears blurring his vision. “But the joke is on him because I didn’t do it for him, I did it for you Hyung. You’d be in prison right now if you had hit Mingook and I couldn’t let that happen. Not because of me.”

“And you think that somehow makes it better?” Cein snapped, the edge in his voice sharp and resentful. “Am I supposed to be grateful Jeha? How am I supposed to feel knowing you did this to protect me? I’d rather be in prison than have to live knowing that I hurt you. Now I can’t look at you without seeing you crumpled on the floor, bleeding.”

They both stayed motionless, Jeha’s quiet weeping and Cein’s heavy breathing the only sounds in the stillness. “I can still fix this,” Jeha said weakly, staring down at his hands that hadn’t left the floor.

Cein spoke softer, the anger dissolved into pain. “Stop protecting me and focus on protecting yourself.”

Cein turned once more to leave, but a timid hand reached out to feebly grasp his pant leg. “Please, don’t leave me,” Jeha whispered shakily. “I love you Hyung.”

“Don’t love me,” Cein replied coldly, masking the shattering he felt inside. “People that love me break.”

Cein pulled his leg free and took another step toward the door. He couldn’t let Jeha see the tears that had escaped his eyes.

“I need you,” Jeha called desperately, his crying intensifying with panic, but unable to move from where he knelt on the floor.

Cein clenched his fists, fighting the urge to scoop up this broken boy in his arms. To tell him he love him too. But he knew if he allowed himself to do that, he’d never be able to let go. And he had already done enough damage. He had to get Jeha away from him before he ruined someone else.

“You are confusing what you need with what you want. You don’t need me. You need to take care of yourself. You need to study. To make your mother and step father happy. You need to protect yourself from being hurt. By me, Mingook, even yourself. You need to live Jeha.”

“I can’t say goodbye,” Jeha choked.

“I can,” Cein said, telling himself as much as Jeha. “Goodbye Jeha. Take care of yourself. Eat well. Live happily.”

At that, Cein left, without allowing himself one last glance back at his misguided protector. The little brother that wanted to be the hyung. He feared seeing the pain in Jeha’s eyes would risk cracking his resolve and he couldn’t afford to let that happen. He knew he had hurt Jeha just now, but this was a wound he could forgive himself for inflicting.

Cein would never forgive himself for hitting Jeha, intentional or not. And Jeha’s confession had only made Cein hate himself more for being the reason Jeha had put himself in harms way. Cein should have kept Jeha at arms length. He had been a fool for thinking they could be each other’s family.

Cein knew the damage family could do to each other and still he had used Jeha’s love as a bandage for his own wounds. But he wouldn’t be selfish any more. Even if he would never say it out loud, Cein loved Jeha. That was why he'd cut Jeha free before there was no hope of healing from the wounds. He wouldn’t scar Jeha the way his mother had scarred him.

Cein would walk away from this life. From Jeha. He deserved far worse than being alone. Still, Cein could take comfort in the fact that Jeha’s life would be better now. His step father was finally giving Jeha the acceptance he desperately needed, even if he tried to convince himself he didn’t. And Mingook wouldn’t dare to hurt Jeha ever again. Jeha would finally have the family he had given up on. Jeha’s wounds would heal and he would live. That was enough for Cein.

——

Jeha cried until numbness replaced the pain. His face was streaked with black ash where he had wiped away countless tears. His entire body felt heavy with exhaustion. Or maybe it was resolve. Hyung had left. He was gone. And Jeha had no more tears. All that was left was a key Cein had discarded the same way he had Jeha.

[notinthislife50]

Chapter 13

Previous Chapter

Next Chapter

You found yourself wandering the tower late one night, though it wasn’t the first time you had and you were pretty sure it wouldn’t be the last. But it was times like this you needed the quiet when your mind was so loud.

Thoughts of Hydra,  John, and where the hell was Phil suffocated your brain. You had hoped all this hiding,  all the running would be over.  You just wanted to live,  just breathe.

As you slowly strolled around the bar area you heard a loud rumble and shortly after saw a flash of light. You smiled wide and ran down the corridor, barging into the lab you couldn't contain your excitement. You knew he would be up, you had both acknowledged,  laughed,  sighed, and shared a drink on some of the nights you found each other wandering.

“You okay?” Tony asked.

“Yes,” you smiled "Come on,” you grabbed his arm leading him back up to the bar and over to the window.

He stood for a minute looking confused and when the thunder and lightning hit again he looked at you. Just as he was about to say something sarcastic, he saw the smile and awe on your face.

He broke free of your arm and walked away.

You looked at him sadly “I’m sorry I didn't mean..” but he cut you off.

“I’m just getting us a drink so we can enjoy the show” he smiled back at you.

As you both sat in the seats he had placed at the window just for you he looked at you and asked,

“So, have you never seen a thunderstorm?” he asked.

“Of course, I have” You laughed I was on the run for over a year, I just haven't seen one from this view” and your eyes widened as the lightning hit the world below you.

You looked at Tony and smiled sadly “I never properly thanked you for putting these chairs here for me, but please know,  this is the most amazing thing anyone has ever done for me.”

“I'm pretty sure when you get out of this tower Bert and Ernie will have you showered in gifts” he laughed.

"Believe me,  I don't doubt that for a second, but I just wanted you to know how grateful I am” You smiled looking out at the storm and the rain smashing against the glass.

“I know it's weird and silly being so obsessed with a view” you tried to explain “I've just never had the chance to experience the world from above when I was on the run, I was hiding from the world and before that, I was kept from it,” you whispered.

Tony took your glass and filled it up “You don't have to explain, I get it.”

You both sat and watched the end of the storm, Tony squeezed your hand “I know you don't think this, but I don't think you're leaving any time soon, pretty sure Coulson will recruit you.”

You laughed loudly. " We will see, now go get back to the beautiful wife of yours.”

You gently crawled back into bed trying not to walk the boys up.  

You turned onto your side and saw Steve smiling gently at you.

“Sorry I didn't mean to wake you," you whispered.

"I have been awake since you left the bed” he smiled “You know we get it?” he softly continued.

“Get what?” you asked.

“We get that sometimes you need your time, you never have to hide that from us.” he tried to convince you.

As you felt the tears well in your eyes you scooted towards him and curled your body around his.

“We love you Y/n” he whispered into your hair.

Your heart stopped and your eyes widened.. Love you, surely no one could love you but John.

@kandis-mom @silverfire475 @fraidoftedark

[inventedfangirling]

Nanon + Khao in 55:15 Never Too Late appreciation post

I had been wanting to watch "55:15 never too late" for the LONGEST time. For several reasons not least among them was that it featured two of my most favourite thai actors - nanon & khaotung. And pls the premise of five 55 year olds returning to their younger 15 yr old bodies in order to make some changes to their past selves and the hijinks that ensue is interesting enough. But ofc the prime reason i was there was to watch the acting masterclass that i knew nanon and khaotung would deliver. I'm only 3 episodes in but im already bowled over.

Nanon especially. I don't know if there is any role that he can't do. he just becomes the role he is doing. It's virtually impossible to see nanon in the role he is playing.

This scene where he is hiding from prim. What shook me was just how much of childishness nanon was able to convey in this scene. He's playing a 15 year old after all. And he does an excellent job of it. Not at all in a forced caricature sorta way. In fact he was so convincing i had to replay several scenes multiple times. It was so very impressive.

And look at that. That's pining personified and you cant even see his face. He is just THAAAT good.

His body language, his micro-expressions, the delivery of dialogues, everything is just pure perfection.

Look at him absolutely nail the look of a lost hurt child who doesn't know who or what to turn to. He really has no business being this good!?!

I was in a bad mood when i was watching that episode. But Nanon is just so good at his job that by sheer force of his acting brilliance he turned my mood around.

His dimples helped for sure. of course.

i mean LOOK AT THEM.

This scene was especially fantastic. Really fun to watch.

But i meant something much more intangible.

You know that feeling when you feel better just by seeing certain works of art, a painting or a sketch, or if you're looking at the sky, or listening to a piece of music, just knowing that such beauty exists in the world by itself enough to lift you up?

Watching Nanon do his thing in this episode felt more or less like that!

Especially this scene that took my breath away.

How was he just 20 when he did this??? it's so mind blowing!

I'll never not be beyond grateful that i decided to watch bad buddy, cos 1. it gave me patpran and 2. it gave me nanon! one of the finest actors i have seen in my entire life. EVER. And he's just 22? I really can't wait to see what all he does over the course of his acting career!

Episode 3 follows the adventures of Khaotung's character "Songpol". I loved his story the most out of all 5 of them. No surprises here. How it's about an adult closeted gay man decides to stop suppressing his identity and live out a life he had denied himself all along. How he has known that he was gay for decades but because he hid that part, he still remains a sorta baby gay at the age of 55, and how this time/body reversal situation gives him a second chance at a more free life.

And while there were fewer opportunities for moments of acting brilliance, he did amazingly well in whatever there was.

And more importantly there wasn't a single second where he was on screen where my heart wasn't brimming with affection.

I especially am LOVING this gay uncle and supportive niece dynamic. We usually see it the other way around so loving this twist on the usual trope. Also khaotung does SO well in this scene where he is occupying his 15 yr old body but his facial expressions reveal the maturity of a 55 year old uncle of his niece who he is talking to.

Also LOVING the way he fanboys over "Jaya".

His devotion is so visible. It's unbelievably endearing. I would make a home for him in my pocket if i could.

Like that's MY baby. A whole cutie patootie.

And also he is SO so handsome i could just watch him just existing for hours.

Gorgeousness🤌

I'm so excited for him to be living out his happy dream gay life. He deserves it so much. Pining for decades and then finally going to confess and then finding out he has found somebody else yet again, just next level of pain. He needs his happy ending. And he better be getting it. I am really looking forward to it.

What i'm not looking forward to is how the multiple love triangles the show has already set up is going to blow up in everyone's faces. It's such an annoying trope. But ANYTHING for a show featuring Nanon and Khao. And for the most parts i am LOVING this show, hopefully i will love it till the end :')

[thisdreamplace]

hiii!! dream hruu💗 hope ur having wonderful times and happy days☆I deeply apologize that isn’t an ask! but you helped me so so much so I wanted to share all of this with you so👯‍♀️

I’m not sure if this is even considered a success story and I read one of ur posts in this master list doc and I will qoute some of the things that changed me completely💗

( so I apologize if this is extremely long :P hahaha I never expected to be at this place ) I hope if some where in the same spot as me , maybe this can help some others♥️♥️)

When I first started I was very afraid , going through terrible times, low self worth, feeling like life was being done to me , losing friends and feeling like I wasn’t enough for anyone and they’re right for leaving me. constantly dominated by fear , anger and desire and despair. I felt like things are just a loop and I will never get through this bc “I don’t deserve it.” “do I deserve to even live in peace and harmony or even able to get through this or am I a terrible terrible person & forever will be… and how so”

until I stumbled upon ur page and others . Seeing others show how to help and care and things about intrusive thoughts, negative emotions etc. made me feel so less alone💌I felt so relieved and I decided to read I promised myself

“ I will never ever ignore myself ever again” “

your post indiff \ doing nothing helped me forever my gratefulness goes miles for you💗💗 when I first saw it was like “ DOING NOTHING WHAT!!!” lowkey terrified and scared bc in the face of the ego it’s a terrifying feeling. I was so hesitant to do it at first feeling like , am I just accepting that terrible thoughts and things will forever happen to me , always fighting every single thought I had. you wrote

“but what if, we actually did nothing ? just sat with it, and let it be ? well now what ? does that thing actually hold any power anymore ? nope. indifference starves the old way of being” - @/thisdreamplace

something inside me said “ give it a chance” so I decided to just do nothing allowing anything to come and go not holding onto anything just laying down and being. Not labeling anything but letting it flow. letting myself breathe and feel whatever I needed to getting it all out with time and love , as uncomfortable and as many tears ran down my face I decided that I’m not gonna hold onto this anymore. Letting emotions / feelings / thoughts rise and fall and rise again not arguing not running away, comforting myself and reassuring myself like you said “ I do care but not enough to do anything about it” and I felt so light and some days not still felt heavy as ever but I let go💗without forcing to let go or even wallowing, I let it stay as long as it needs to and then let it free beacuse it doesn’t have power over me it’s meaningless , but I’ll welcome it with love 💗💗♥️

kinda like sitting on a beach wave and letting the waves hit me no matter how hard the waves are I’ll continue to sit down 🌊🌊and enjoy the view

letting go and letting god. I struggled with this concept so much. “ WHAT?? LET GO?? NU UH….WHAT IF I CANT TRUST THAT.” “But what if it goes so well💗” letting go? what will happen to me… what will happen. but out of love I decided to let go little by little

“. i mainly do this all by allowing myself to surrender to whatever comes up, whether its in the 3d or within me. it doesn't matter. whether its beautiful or ugly, i surrender to it and know god will handle it, because god is on my side. i am on my own side. i definitely let go and let god — i practice trust in this way.”--@/thisdreamplace

this helped me , beacuse I was going through so much feeling deviated feeling like I was taking hit by hit. Heartbroken time from time or even the happiest I could ever be all I reminded my self regardless “ I am in the right place ♥️I am where I supposed to be “ or even “ I know god will handle i beacuse god is on my side “ or even just “everything will be ok” and walked on into my day💗 I choose things that made me so happy , so loved so sentimental , when faced with things or situations I let myself feel through it and comforted myself beacuse I deserve love at all times no matter what is the situation or even if it’s considered negative💗I didn’t give the negative emotions hate , I starved them from any negativity even as bad the thought , I fought it with love and patience and gave it the time it needed until I could move into the state I prefer.

one thing I used to do is I knew all of this and acted on it but, I was always in my room , never going out or even just doing nothing. Just isolated from the world beacuse I used to think that was right . I was always dealing with emotions and thoughts it happened all the time, I was so distraught I knew what to do but I’m so tired. Until I read this by you( it quite literally changed my life)

“i started to push myself out of my comfort zone and go do things in real life, rather than sitting in my room telling myself "i dont have to lift a finger ! if i just sit in here in my mind it will surely happen" (i got tired of telling myself that after 2 years of a rather stagnant-feeling life) so i said fuck it and started doing things. which only snowballed because then i got comfortable doing things. and now ive had so much fucking fun in my life in just the past couple months. i only say that because it still blows my mind n i am beyond thankful for my experiences this year !” - @/thisdreamplace

“take it step by step, little things that are out of your norm and you will see the way life responds to you so beautifully”-@/thisdreamplace

I was like so confused at first but then , I had this strong urge within me to just take a walk, something that was irregular I mean it’s freezing cold why would I? But it was so strong I was like yk frick it!! I took a walk expecting nothing but honestly just a good walk. I felt so much better or even some days the same but I started doing things that where considered “ out of nowhere” “irregular “ like taking a nice walk watching a movie , going outside and having fun, eating a new place and it has changed me 💗💗

( omg sorry if this already so long but these are some quotes that honestly changed my perspective)💗💗

“nothing that is in front of you at this moment, is an obstacle or something you need to pretend isnt there.”-@/thisdreamplace

“take what you have and let it be part of what guides you. make that your goal. feeling complete. (or whatever you want, really) when that is your goal, instead of your desire, you wake up everyday and make decisions based on your true self. not that egotistic urge for results.””-@/thisdreamplace

“life responds to you perfectly when youre just busy loving yourself and making the most out of each day. :') things just happen with ease and so beautifully. <3”-@/thisdreamplace

there’s so many more posts that helped me but this so SO LONG OMG, so I will end it off here. There’s are some others that helped tho :). “How can I feel like I’m god?” “Going back and forth” “no effort “ “for those who struggle” etc.

bless you dream you’ve changed my perspective and I will continue to follow this all. my gratefulness cannot be put into words. I’m beyond grateful 💗💗thank you so so very much my dear dream. I am wishing you forever and ever happy days , happy everything and lovely lovely experiences/dreams♥️have a great life 💗♥️♥️♥️♥️🫂- anon who types too much LOL

hiiii <3 i'm doing vvvv well, and i hope you are too ! sorry it took me a while to reply to this message, but omg. you are THE CUTEST. it seriously made my day opening this app and seeing this message from you !! it's so thought out and extremely touching. i appreciate you taking your time to write this to me. 🥹💓

first of all, i'm inspired by you ! i love reading how much you have overcome on your own, allowing yourself to feel those difficult things and not wavering for yourself, keeping moving forward despite it all. and i really love this bit, "kinda like sitting on a beach wave and letting the waves hit me no matter how hard the waves are I’ll continue to sit down 🌊🌊and enjoy the view" super real, and true. just letting ourselves flow along with the river of life... and enjoying the sights along the way :')

I LOVE YOU ANON WHO TYPES TOO MUCH 🥰 lmfao fkdjkfdk no but seriously, you have no idea what this messages means to me and how warm i felt reading it. you are so beautiful, and truly so deserving of all of the lovely things you're allowing yourself to experience now and to come. continue being open, continue waking up everyday and choosing to do things out of love. and once again, thank you so much for this message. it's truly so beautiful and uplifting. i hope you continue to have the happiest days <3

🫧🕊

[nescamonster]

Not terrible moment

So I am in love with @asterbae 's amazing Fic "Perfect Slaughter" on Ao3. Unfortunately I was not blessed with the artistic streak, all I can do is offer up is a non cannon, fanfiction of Their fanfiction to give the Boys a tiny sliver of a not terrible moment in their eternal lives cause boy does Tyrus and Astarion got it rough and i love it but also wanna let them take a breath.

Any who hope I didn't butcher the characters too badly, Don't judge on my work, check out Perfect slaughter for yourselves! (Though beware dead dove, definitely take in the tags before you read)

It had taken 87 years, but finally, the stars aligned.

Tyrus couldn't let the chance pass them by, as he didnt know when another perfect night would arrive. Cazador so rarely let Tyrus bring in prey, and rarer still on the same night as Astarion.

"Come, darling, I'll help you find a mark." Astarion called to Tryus as the spawns started dispersing after receiving orders.

"Surely he doesn't need his hand held anymore astarion." Violet teased, her sharp eyes going between them wonderingly.

"It's about not being punished. Do you think the master will stop at tyrus' incompetence or would he then look to the one who trained him?" Astarion gave a sarcastic tap against his temple, "i know you rarely use it darling, but if you don't stretch those mental muscles they will degrade you know."

Violet hissed, showing her fangs but she left without another word. No doubt fearing standing there arguing was eating into her hunting time.

Astarion flashed a victorious smile then looked more softly at Tyrus who happily fell into step beside the older vampire spawn. This was what he wanted after all.

"Lets try the elfsong for you I think." Astarion mused aloud only to raise a brow when Tryus shook his head, "oh? You've something else in mind?"

Tyrus had felt ill when he made this plan, but he knew now after so many years that there was no enjoyment without pain. His, astarions, someones. There had to be suffering to equal the scales.

"Homeless twins. Near the wyrms rock last I saw them." Tyrus wanted this part over as quickly as possible, "they run a scam where they pretend to be the same human, but their blood scent betrays them."

Astarions eyes lit up with interest and his step increased, "I guess we could spare an hour to look…"

Tyrus kept the pace, his eyes down and Astarion noticed, slowing slightly and clearing his throat to have the younger drow look up at him.

"Any particular reason why you've waited until now to speak of such prey?" A warning tone entered his honeyed voice, "you weren't attempting to spare-"

Tyrus couldn't help the burst of bitter laughter that spilt from his lips at the thought.

"This is the most selfish thing I have ever done." He admitted, "I saved them for when we could hunt together. I knew you would do better at securing them quickly."

"Well a night in our bunks is preferable too-"

"No." Tyrus was firm with his denial. He didn't do this, offering up innocent siblings so they could lay in the dark and wait for the next atrocity. Astarions step faltered but he caught himself and they kept moving at a quick pace through the city.

As Astarion stayed quiet, Tyrus knew he was waiting for an explanation.

"I-I wanted at least an hour… to-to show you something." Why were the words so hard to say? Why did astarions guarded look cut him to the core?

Tyrus was not well fed enough to blush, but he kept his eyes on the road they walked and pushed through, "i would like if we could secure our offering then- take a, a moment, before…"

No doubt astarion was burning with curiosity but tyrus was thankful he asked no more. Instead he had the drow direct them to these homeless vagabonds.

The twins were comely, by no means beautiful but their identical faces made for an interesting gimmick that was sure to please Cazador. Astarion took the lead, for which Tyrus was grateful.

He didn't need to do more than smile and wrap his arms around one woman's waist before her sister was drugged and asleep. She squirmed as she saw this, but Tyrus knew better than to let her go. He just held her still as Astarion force fed her the drugged wine and helped his fellow spawn stow them both in a secure location they could return to in an hour.

Astarion brushed off his doublet and smiled at Tyrus when the drow used his cantrip to clean the dirt desperate fingers had left on him. They were taking a risk not immediatly returning but Astarion said nothing of that, instead cocking his head at Tyrus.

"So, where too now?" He asked.

Tyrus lead the way, checking homes as they found one that didn't prevent them entry. An abandoned home filled with dirt and vermin that Astarion eyed with distaste and thirst warring in his face.

"You cannot be thinking of sneaking a drink." Astarion in an unbelieving tone, "you cannot be that dense even after all these years."

Tyrus was cleaning up a small amount of space, using the weave to clear the dirt and scare away the rats, "no,no. I would never." He shuddered, remembering with vivid detail the consequences of taking blood from anywhere but cazadors' hands.

Instead he sat down in the cleared space and pet the floor next to him. Astarion was cautious but less so than any of their siblings. He lowered himself with grace and looked about warily.

"A nice little hovel. I can see why you just had to show me."

Tyrus gave a shaky breath and smiled at the Spawn who had made the years just slightly less terrible then they could have been. He pulled from his pocket some fleece and reached into the weave as he spoke.

"Close your eyes for a moment, they might take a bit of time to adjust…" then he spoke the incantation, pulling the impossible through to the possible.

Astarion hadnt closed his eyes so it was with a fearful shout that he slammed his shoulders back against the wall as the major image illusion unfolded around them.

Grass sprung up, earsing the floorboards, as the world expanded, grey skies and dark trees filling a twenty foot space. Tyrus held onto his concentration even as Asatrion swore, gazing up a stormy sky just before the rain broke, sunlight diluted by the clouds but clearly day in a forest clearing.

They could smell the ozone, the scent of wet foliage strong in the air. A light breeze tingled their skin but no illusion could ruffle their clothes which stayed static in this moment. They could hear the soft rumble of the thunder and the rustle of the leaves. Tyrus turned to look fully at his companion once the spell was fully cast and was horrified to see tears starting to spill.

Astarion lifted a shaky hand to clasp over his mouth as his eyes were blown wide, taking in the sight. He had only shed two tears but as starved as they were kept, he may as well have been sobbing.

"Oh, I'm sorry! This-this was meant to be- i-i'll cancel it, hold on." Tyrus prepared to drop it, but astarions hand shot out, grasping his forearm.

"Don't you dare!" He hissed, "don't you give me this just to take it away!"

Tyrus stopped, then carefully and slowly placed his hands over astarions, nodding his agreement, "I won't. We can stay here for as long as… well twenty minutes or so anyway."

Astarion paid no heed to the time limit, instead taking in the view, seemingly trying to imprint it into his mind. He didn't move his grip, so Tyrus settled for petting Astarions hand gently and looking around himself.

"I don't remember… where this is." Tyrus felt he owed Astarion an explanation but it was difficult. So much was gone, so many important things.

"I think I had a family? And, and we were… i've no idea why i was here, or when… but i remember the storm" they both looked at it now, rolling lazily towards them, "i remember thinking it was beautiful."

"It is…" Astarion suddenly gave a choked laugh, "we can never speak of this."

"I know." Of course Tyrus knew that. Cazador was strict with how much access his spawn had to the weave. He'd be furious they had experienced even a second of sunlight, illusioned and storm dimmed as it was.

Tyrus looked down as Astarion moved his hand from forearm to clasp with Tyrus' fingers. The High elf looked him in the eye as he gentle brought the drows hand to his lips, a chaste kiss planted on his knuckles, featherlight but filled with emotion.

"Thank you… Tyrus…" Astarion sounded breathless, his voice hushed as another roll of thunder broke, "I will never forget this… thank you."

The image faded around them, a silence falling as reality reasserted itself. Astarion still had his hand and Tyrus realized that neither of them were breathing.

Astarion closed his eyes then took a shuddering breath before opening them, his face a mask of mischievous once more. He kindly returned tyrus' hand to its owner and stood in one graceful movment.

"We should be off"

"I-i have one more-" Tyrus stuttered, trying to offer another casting. He didn't want the moment to be over, did not want to return to their lives so soon.

Astarions smile was sad but kind as he offered a hand to the drow, "best not live in dreams darling, magnificent as they are."

Tyrus squeezed his eyes shut, feeling the burn of tears unshed for a long moment before he too let go of the dream. They had a single moment where they were not spawn, but free under an untamed sky. A moment that was as illusionary as the spell itself.

He took Astarions hand, standing and nodding. It was time to return to what was real for no amount of trickery would stop cazador from finding them if they didn't return themselves.

Their hands fell apart, palms still carrying the warmth of the other. Then the two left the hovel and went to collect their offering to their cruel master.

Above the city, a storm crackled, beginning to roll across the night sky…

[exuding-sunlight]

Only four days time until I see you my darling love, I cannot wait. My soul awaits your ever sweet embrace.

My mind is a beautiful concoction of everything that we are together, you have redesigned my way of thinking and being, of existing, of breathing. Every breath I take - I dedicate it to you. I am yours just as you are mine. All mine.

No other can love you the way I do. I will continue to love you so fully and deeply, for the rest of our lives I am your servant, your knight, your bleeding heart.

For giving me the chance to know you, I am forever changed.

For giving me the chance to learn your touch, I am bewildered at the thought.

For giving me the pleasure of your very presence, I am eternally grateful.

[majesticwren]

A/N: This happened. I am not sorry. It's 10k of which more than 7k are filthy smut. It took me the longest fucking time to complete. It's polyamory, what can I say, I love writing this stuff. ✨ I hope you'll like it. It is supposed to be a stand-alone, but since I've imagined another 4/5 chapters to make it a complete small story, more might be coming. It takes place some years after Top Gun: Maverick movie events. I don't use reader or Y/N, but the OFC is not physically described. Tumblr fucked the pic definition :(

Words: 10k Trigger Warnings: swearing, smut, smut, smut, no plot only filth, polyamory, threesome, fluff, VERY brief mention of anxiety, did I say smut?

Part 1 - In The Middle Of The Night

She sat on the kitchen counter, looking out the window, enjoying the silence and the darkness surrounding her. The room was lit only by the pale moonlight seeping through the window while the entire house was covered by a layer of slumber for which she was quite grateful.

She loved her family to bits. She would have given her life for her kids in a heartbeat and her husband was the love and light of her life. But there were moments she also loved to have some time and space to herself. The freedom to be able to sit on the kitchen counter, stretching her legs on it, eating ice cream straight out of the tub, without having to be concerned about risking teaching her kids some bad habits, was a blessed privilege.

Though, she didn’t mind her life at all. If someone asked her what she would have changed in her life she would have said “nothing” and if someone gave her the chance to go back in time, she would have done everything all over again.

Emily was a content woman. She had about everything one could desire and more. She had the unconditional love of a charming, warm, extremely talented, extremely gorgeous man, father of their two beautiful children. And they were happy. Disgustingly happy.

She didn’t mind the messy house constantly filled with buzzing energy. She didn’t mind the smudged tiny handprints that were left with paint on the living room wall one time. She didn’t mind the accidents and broken things. She didn’t mind being woken at ungodly hours of the morning by small, giggly voices requiring attention. She didn’t mind the music often playing in the background and the obligatory parties and dance-offs always happening around her. So was the curse of being married to a man who loved music and dancing and who spent every breathing second transmitting such passion to his sons. She didn’t mind that her husband's career brought her to be a stay-at-home wife and full-time mum. She didn’t mind the idea that their family would have only grown.

She didn’t mind at all, actually, Emily considered herself extremely lucky with her happy, loving, simple life.

A sigh left her chest as she relaxed her back against the window frame, savouring some of her ice cream. There was something she minded though, and that was when her husband’s career took him away from her. He was a decorated Top Gun pilot. Lieutenant Bradley Bradshaw, known among his peers as Rooster. Which meant that his duty to the Navy always came first.

She wasn’t sure what she hated the most: the interminable weeks she spent waiting for him to return home safe, always battling against the cold loneliness and the overwhelming anxiety given by the constant fear of losing him; or knowing that a call could have arrived any time, breaking through the time they had together.

“What are you doing up? It’s late, Mrs Bradshaw.”

Startled by the intruder’s voice, Emily gazed over to the kitchen door, suddenly feeling uneased. She knew it was only a friendly, innocent interruption, yet she felt like she had just been exposed. She even tried to hide the tub of ice cream in an immediate muscle reaction.

It only lasted a second, though. Emily immediately recognised him, and a warm smile melted her features as she relaxed. “I could ask you the same thing, Jake.”

Her family and she weren’t living alone. For the past six months, they shared their house with Lieutenant Jake “Hangman” Seresin. He had been personally called to be stationed at the local naval base working with Bradley on a project supervised by Maverick. Clearly, now that Pete had been grounded, he wanted only the best pilots working for him.

She didn’t have a problem with that. Too warm and welcoming by nature to oppose helping someone, Emily was the first who suggested offering their guest room to Jake. But he wasn’t only one of her husband’s colleagues, he was the man that flew side by side with her husband, he was the only person she trusted to bring her Bradley back home to her safe, every time. He wasn’t only a roommate; he was part of the family. He was Bradley’s best friend, after all. He had been his best man at their wedding, and he was their first son's godfather. So, it came without saying that they were more like a unit, by now.

He helped around the house and with the kids, and he watched over Bradley’s shoulder while they were at work. It was more than enough for her to gladly ignore his sardonic side or the character flaws he sometimes had.

Emily dug her spoon into the tub of salted caramel ice cream, gathering a big mouthful of it, making sure to pick as many raisins as she possibly could, as she looked outside the window. Her eyes wandered to the dark edges of the trees. She didn’t pay too much attention to Jake’s moving around the room, she was way too acquainted with him and his presence by now. Even as he got close enough they could easily touch, it didn’t bother her. Not at all, not ever.

She looked back at him, her lazy gaze cruising on his attractive features as she leaned her head against the wall. He was so close she could feel the warmth his body gave off on her naked legs. 

There was only one real problem in that entire happy family, perfect life scenario she lived into. And it was quite a simple one. She liked Jake. Not only as a friend, not only as a person, and surely not only as part of the family. Emily liked him as a man. Improperly and unashamedly.

There were many things they did that weren’t proper, especially between a married woman who loved her husband dearly, and a man who lived under their roof and who was said husband’s best friend.

She looked at him with the intention of seeing him. If he was in the same room, she couldn’t take her attention away from Jake, nor she really tried. She always justified herself with the excuse that he was simply too good-looking. And in time it just became harder and harder for her not to notice every little detail about him. To the point that now she was so acquainted to the way his body language responded to situations, he sometimes didn’t need to speak for her to know what he was thinking. She knew where to find many of the scars that signed his skin. And she could have drawn out of memory the lines of solid muscles on his sculpted body.

Possibly even worsening their situation, though, there was the fact that she knew Jake did the same with her. He looked at her all the time. And she liked it. God, if she liked to have his eyes on her. When she dressed to impress, or better to charm, she didn’t do it only to catch her husband's attention. What a thrill when both the men noticed her naked skin or curves showing from under her clothes. The only difference was Bradley was vocative and physical about it, while Jake only gave her extremely evocative looks.

Once, as Bradley and she seized a moment of quiet and gave in to their passion, making love on the sofa, she caught Jake spying on them. And she didn’t stop her husband from giving her pleasure. At the time, it felt dangerous, prohibited and electrifying, only after she started to realise how wrong that whole situation was.

Because it wasn’t only physical anymore. It wasn’t only catching a glimpse of an attractive man or the thrill of being desired. Now there were feelings involved. Her tummy went all tingly when she watched Jake playing with her kids. Well, she did, in fact, often have the butterflies when he was around. It was the same with Bradley. Except he was her husband and father of her children, so everything of the matter with him was appropriate.

Every day, when Bradley and Jake had to leave for work, she had to kiss them both. Her husband on the lips, Jake on the cheek. It started as a joke, but now it was a habit. And if for some reason, it didn’t happen exactly that way, if she didn’t get the chance to kiss both of them goodbye, then her day was ruined.

“What are you having?” He asked giving a curious look at the tub, distracting her from her thoughts.

“Well, I wanted to be healthy and have only raisins, you know? Nature snack. But the tub of ice cream was calling my name.” She didn’t miss his lips curling in a grin as she spoke. “Is that so?” He chuckled, “can I have some?”

She simply offered him the tub of ice cream watching as he used her same spoon to eat some.

“So, why are you up?” She wondered trying her best to ignore the shiver it gave her to look at him right in the eye as he licked the spoon clean.

“I only recently came home, actually.”

“Oh, yeah, the date! How did it go?”

“It wasn’t a date. And good, ended up at her place and fucked her so great if you ask me.”

Ah, yes, the never-ending stream of one-night-stand conquests Jake would accomplish. He had the emotional maturity of a frat boy. She liked to think it wasn’t something that bothered her; it couldn’t be, because it wasn’t her business. And yet. there was something about it that still slid under her skin.

She kept justifying herself with the simple excuse that she hated for him to be alone and that she wanted to fix him with someone because she cared about him. He was the kind of man who’d appear all prickly at first, but underneath, he was warm and soft, melting at the first sight of affection. At least, that’s how she knew him to be. And she wanted him to have love and warm arms waiting for him to come home to. That had nothing to do with the fact that if he found someone, it would have finally broken whatever spell was imprisoning them in that weird situation they had going on.

“Gonna call her back?” She wondered taking back her tub of ice cream and proceeding to eat some from the same spoon with absolutely no disgust. Actually, unashamedly looking forward to putting her mouth where he was, just a second ago.

“Nah-” He smiled, shaking his shoulders, “not my type.”

He leaned on the counter next to her and, acting naturally as if he wasn’t even thinking about it, he gently slid his hands around her naked ankle, fluidly pulling it up so she could lean her foot on his solid abdomen as he massaged her tired joint.

Emily should have squirmed. She should have kicked off that kind of touch. She should have thought that it was way too intimate to be a suitable showing of affection between friends. But she didn’t. She let him touch her, and the warmth of his hands, mixed with the pleasureful motion of his fingers helping her muscles relax only made her sigh gratefully.

“And what is your type?” She wondered, licking ice cream off the spoon. No reason to lie, she did it just to see Jake’s pale eyes fall on her mouth. Was he holding his breath? “I think you know.”

“No, I don’t.” She challenged him.

“You know, the married kind of woman.” His look was so intense as he gazed upon her that she felt completely naked under his eyes. She knew exactly what he meant and still, his words ripped her breath off her lungs. She shook her head, and, with intention, she pushed her foot in the middle of his stomach, making him take a step back. “No, Jake. This – this is not ok.”

“You started the conversation. And don’t tell me you don’t know exactly what I’m talking about. I know you’re smarter than that, Mrs Bradshaw.”

“Bradley is asleep on the sofa just in the other room. And my kids are asleep upstairs. I can’t be flirting with you like this –”

“Why? It has never been a problem on any other occasion.”

“Jake-” she breathed his name in a silent request to not go there because she couldn’t bare it. Not because it would feel dirty and not because she had anything to hide, Bradley knew everything. She never kept anything a secret from her husband and one of those things was how Jake started to make her feel. Yet, somehow, one thing seemed to be talking about it with her husband, whispering between the bedsheets telling secrets, and one thing is openly deciding to play with fire.

“Don’t tell me you don’t want it to, because I know it would be a lie. Do you really think I don’t know that you beg your husband to fuck you hard every time I bring a girl home because it turns you on to hear me fuck someone else?”

Naked. She was naked underneath his gaze. Body and spirit. Fuck, he wasn’t wrong. Not at all. And yet, she wasn’t willing to give in, her point was standing pretty firmly.

She lifted her chin, proudly. “Oh, yeah? Fuck you. As if it doesn’t turn you on to sit around my table, being served the food I’ve cooked for my husband and kids. As if you don’t get all grumpy if a day, I don’t kiss you on the cheek before you guys leave.”

Jake pushed himself against her foot, getting as close as he could to her. “Woman, you do not know the half of it,” he dared to push his hands higher on her leg, following her calf up to her knee in a caress that gave her goosebumps, “it drives me insane to hear you sing under the shower, or to hear you giggle with Bradley, or to hear the muffled noises of you two having sex. Fuck, that is the worse, because I know he is giving you pleasure and not being there - not being there for any of it is fucking maddening.”

“Jake-” She could have cried by then. Because everything she wanted to do was to lean forward to grab him and hold him tight. Sliding her legs around his waist and her arms around his shoulders, pushing her face against his neck or even kissing him would have been so easy. Yet, she couldn’t.

Maybe it was time to call a family meeting and sit her husband and Jake down for a good talk.

“Just kiss already.” They both gasped as their attention got abruptly distracted towards the door. Bradley stood there; arms crossed to his chest, comfortably leaning against the door frame just as Jake did a few minutes ago.

“Bradley,” she whispered as Jake turned towards him, shaking his head. “Man, listen, I-”

“No. I am being serious,” he gave himself a push and moved through the room, getting closer to them. His tone was soft and warm as ever. “I know you both want it.”

She exchanged a brief look with Jake and then turned to Bradley. God, with both that close, Jake still standing there holding her leg and Bradley rolling an arm around her waist, making it impossible for her to breathe or think straight.

Bradley wrapped his free hand around her jaw, bringing her to look up at him. His dark gaze cruised on her face, stopping on her mouth. The way he licked his own lips gave her a shiver. He offered an encouraging smile. “You want to, don’t you, darling?” He pressed his thumb on her lips.

She couldn’t hold it in any longer. Something twitched inside of her and everything she had forbidden herself from desiring spilt out. “Yes.”

“Yes, what, my love?” Bradley encouraged her to continue with a nod, caressing her lips. “Yes, Lieutenant, I want to kiss him.”

Bradley’s satisfaction and pride glimmered through his eyes. “That’s my girl.” He smiled first at her and then at Jake. “You gotta respect what my wife desires, Hangman.”

Jake didn’t hesitate one second and as soon as Bradley left him space, offering him access to his wife’s mouth, he was on her.

Emily lost her ability to think straight as soon as Jake wrapped gently his hands around her face, pulling her towards him. His scent filled her lungs, fogging her thoughts. His touch was warm, solid but surprisingly soft and God if she was starving for it. He hesitated only one second, before brushing his lips against hers. At first, he even appeared shy, but then they both lost every form of control over their hunger.

Their kiss became quickly unashamed making out, as Jake slid his hands between her hair, pulling her head backwards to give him better access to her mouth. She let him, arching her back, pushing her chest against his. Her legs had already slid over his hips and with an arm she held onto his shoulders, while with her other hand she clutched on Bradley's tank top, making sure to keep her husband close.

Jake’s flavour on her tongue was better than any fantasy she had ever had. It was like ambrosia. It went straight to her head, like a drug. To the point that even if it was only a kiss, a soft moan left her throat. Both men around her grunted in approval.

Emily pushed a hand between Jake’s blonde hair, giving him a strong pull, breaking their kiss. Without even thinking about it, driven by a wild desire she had never experienced before, she turned towards Bradley and pulled him in for a kiss. She didn’t need to breathe as much as she suddenly felt the need to taste the flavour of her husband mixed with Jake’s on her tongue.

God, that thought gave her a shiver, taking her mind to unspeakable, dirty but ravaging desires.

Since her mouth was busy, Jake still didn’t leave her any space. He pressed his face on her neck socket, kissing, licking, and biting her soft, sensitive skin. And she didn’t push him away. Her fingers lingered between his hair in a praising caress, much like she mirrored with her husband, sliding her other hand around his throat.

She started to rub herself against Jake, trying to ease the pressure that was already building between her legs. God, she was already so wet she could feel her skin being soaked, but that time she had no intention to hide her desire.

Emily gave both men a push, without finding any resistance. They moved to her rhythm. She tried her best to catch her breath, but looking up at them both, seeing them as breathless, with their tumid, wet lips and devoted, glimmery eyes full of plain and simple desire, made it all so much more difficult.

“I want you. Both. Right now.” She managed to express herself without even knowing if her words made sense at all.

Jake's immediate response was puffing up his chest, as Bradley smiled. They exchanged a look, but their attention was lifted from her only for a second. As soon as they looked back at her, she knew she was done.

Jake slid his hands over her legs and thighs, unapologetically lifting the helm of her short nightgown, looking at her skin getting uncovered. A proud smirk appeared on his lips. “Both of us at the same time, baby?”

She let her head fall backwards, releasing a sigh as soon as she heard him call her by that pet name. At that point, she wasn’t trying anymore to pretend she wasn’t completely and utterly devoured by her desire for that man. The fact that her husband was present, looking at her arching and rubbing herself against another man only increased her lust.

“Yes,” she hissed, “fuck, yes.”

“Are you sure, baby? Because I don’t know about your husband here, but I want to do everything in my power to give you as much pleasure as I can.”

“Oh, don’t worry Hangman, she knows my only priority is her satisfaction.”

They exchanged another complicit look, from which Jake’s slid away only to melt into her eyes. His hands were now solidly wrapped around her hips. “Do you know what that means, honey?” She couldn’t breathe. Emily dug her teeth into her lower lip to stop herself from releasing a sigh. She was already in shambles and none of them even started to touch her. “Do you think you can take all of that?”

“I can take everything you have to give, fellas.” She sent them both a challenging look, enjoying seeing them both tremble.

Bradley softly pushed his hand under her chin, trapping her look. He pushed his thumb over her mouth and, this time, he didn’t stop, pushing his digit between her lips so she could suck on it. And she did, not taking her eyes off her husband, knowing Jake was looking at her. “Shall we show the Lieutenant how good you can be, darling?”

She nodded, wrapping her tongue around his thumb, sending a playful look towards Jake. Emily felt his fingers grip tighten around her hips, grabbing her skin and flesh, giving her a shiver. She so wanted to see him snap.

He slid his hands higher under the soft material of her gown. Only when his hands reached for her ribs, Jake choked. “You aren’t wearing any underwear-”

A grin curled Bradley’s lips. “She never does. So fucking cheeky. Right, darling?”

Emily nodded, looking at them both, only pretending to smile innocently. “It gets me what I want.”

She didn’t even know how it started. If it was because she liked to be woken up by Bradley pleasuring her, or because she loved instances where his attentions started only as a lazy caress, and she just wanted to give him easier access. Or if he did all of that especially because she often slept almost naked. In all honesty, it didn’t even matter when it just helped their sex life.

“Fuck, baby,” Jake rubbed his hand on his lips and chin, “you should have said something.”

“Why, when the surprise on your face is so much better?” She had no dignity. No shame. Who needed that when she had just openly asked those two men to fuck her?

Jake sent a surprising look to Bradley, and then he was the one who snatched her chin, pulling her face closer to his, making her look right into his eyes. “Mrs Bradshaw, you don’t know what you’re doing to me.”

“Then show it to me, Lieutenant.” She knew he would have liked to be called by his title. Bradley did. It turned him on, especially if she was using it to command him to do something specific to her. The shiver that crossed Jake let her know how right she was.

He turned towards Bradley, his eyes seemed crazed, feverish, as he looked for the other man's attention. “Give me permission to touch her, Rooster.”

Bradley offered him an encouraging smile and then he lifted his chin, looking at his wife. So much pride and desire were flowing between them. “You will do whatever my wife will tell you to do, Hangman. If it pleases her, it pleases me.”

That was the precise moment Jake snapped. As he turned to her, Emily was already nodding.

He didn’t need more than that. Jake was on her in a second. Sliding his arm around her waist, he hooked a hand under her ass, lifting her slightly off the counter, only to give himself more space and to grant her more comfort.

God, how many women did he fuck on counters to know how to handle their bodies so well?

She moulded between his arms and welcomed the roll of his fingers on her core with a pleasureful sigh. “Fuck-” he choked again, giving her a devoted look, and then looking at Bradley. “Your wife is so wet.”

Jake pushed his fingers between her folds in a caress that was both attentive and famished. She rolled her eyes and let her head fall backwards, lost feeling his fingers on her. He knew exactly what he was doing and how to touch a woman, which shouldn’t have come as a surprise. But God, she also thought that was a curse. He started off slowly and didn’t appear to be much interested in doing more but closely studying the pleasure growing on her.

Emily looked at Bradley, not ashamed to show him how much she liked to be touched by Jake. Her lips were parted as she left heavy sighs slid out of her chest. The fact that he clearly liked what he was seeing gave her a shiver.

Jake stopped caressing her and brought his fingers to his mouth, sucking on them. She looked at his nostrils flaring as he closed his eyes, releasing a soft moan. “And you taste so good.”

Bradley moved quickly. He slid a hand around her throat, bringing her to look at him. “Do you want the Lieutenant to eat your sweet pussy, darling?”

At first, the only noise she could express was a tiny whimper. It took her all her control to be able to articulate words. “Yes.”

“Then tell him.” Bradley softly kissed her lips, and then the corner of her mouth, and then traced a trail with his lips along her jaw, pushing her to look back at Jake. He was looking at them like a hungry predator. His pale green eyes glimmered as a grin full of expectation grew on his mouth.

Damn, how could he be so astonishingly beautiful?

“Please, Jake-” She was ready to beg him some more, or to order him if it needed to be, but he didn’t let her finish. His lips sealed hers in a moment. Her stomach trembled as her lower abdomen vibrated under the painful pressure of arousal growing, as both the men she was deeply attracted to were giving her attention.

“Is that how you want me to give you your first orgasm, honey?” The look he gave her was pure devotion as both he and Bradley looked over her. Emily nodded. No hesitation. “Yes, Lieutenant.”

Jake nodded with the determination only a military man would have and, as he lowered himself, kneeling on the floor in front of her, Bradley guided her legs on his shoulders. He lingered kissing her inner thigh. It lasted only a second, enough to make her hiss a moment before he dived into her.

As soon as he pressed his flat tongue against her most sensitive, exposed skin, sliding it through her folds, a violent lash of pleasure washed over her. Her husband, knowing exactly what was coming, was ready to seal her louder moans with a kiss, silencing her.

She grabbed onto Bradley’s body, trying her best to find an edge to hold on, not to slip into the deepest waters of pleasure in a second. God, Jake’s mouth was heaven. And her husband’s mouth on hers was even hotter. She dug her nails into his skin. Neck, shoulders, or arms, whatever it was that she could touch, she scratched, kissing him as if her life depended on it.

The air was filled with the obscene noises they were making. Her moans were suffocated by sloppy kisses, accompanied by the even messier noises Jake’s mouth did as he ate her out. And the two men moaned. God, they were both so deeply satisfied by her pleasure. It was all music to her ears.

Suddenly devoured by her need to give back some of the pleasure she was receiving, she slid a hand over Bradley’s chest and down on his abdomen, following the edges of his muscles under the thin material of his tank top. She pushed her fingers over the edge of his joggers and easily found his erection. She had felt it pressing on her side and she couldn’t resist anymore. She wasn’t a selfish lover. She rolled her palm around his shaft, starting to slowly massage him.

Bradley hissed at her touch at first, breaking the kiss, but then, almost immediately he melted in a whimper, pressing his forehead against hers.

Jake pushed a hand up on her torso, sliding his palm right on the centre of her chest. His movement attracted her attention to him. God, she hadn’t had any time to notice how gorgeous he was, on his knees, between her legs. He responded to their eyes locking, sucking her flesh into her mouth, intentionally ripping from her a louder moan.

Held by their arms, Emily let herself go as her pleasure took over, growing through her, tensing her muscles as shivers crawled on her skin. Jake skilfully guided her through her pleasure, following the movement of her hips and the quickness of her breath to know when she got close to reaching her orgasm and then, he gave her exactly what she wanted, exactly what she needed, accompanying her through her release.

She unravelled against the two men, her body shaking uncontrollably between their arms, as Bradley suffocated her moans again with a kiss, sealing her lips with his, not that that stopped her from whining into his mouth, which only caused the two men to grown in response.

Soon, Jake was back on his feet. He quickly rubbed his palm on his lips and chin, attempting to clean himself off. Bradley moved, leaving him room, granting them the possibility to kiss. She wrapped her hand around Jake’s throat, demanding his closeness, passing her tongue on his lips, needing to taste herself on his mouth.

Then, she gave them both a push, just enough so she could untangle from their embrace and jump off the counter, willingly and cheekily breaking that moment just because she wanted to see them moving, reacting to her like magnets, unable to distance themselves from her. She wanted them to chase after her. She wanted to play with the power those two men just gave her.

She made sure to fix her nightgown on her legs, as she moved back towards the door. “So, are you taking me to bed or what?”

Jake and Bradley exchanged another complicit look with each other, before bolting towards her. They clearly didn’t need to be asked twice.

Everyone knew to behave on their way up the stairs. The house was so quiet she suspected even a soft giggle or stepping too heavily on the steps would have woken one of the children. Waking one meant waking both. And they didn’t want that.

Emily guided both men to the master bedroom holding their hands.

She didn’t want to think about the consequences and what would have waited for them the next day. She had no time to think about what it would mean to share her bed with both Bradley and Jake and, frankly, it didn’t matter. Desire made her extremely short-sighted and somewhat selfish. All she needed to know was that Bradley was on board and, by then, he seemed more than willing to share her and their bed.

Welcoming Jake into their bedroom for the first time gave her a shiver. She enjoyed seeing the initial hesitation on his face as he took a step through the door. He looked around the room, studying their most private space. It felt weird to see him roaming through her most personal belongings – and at the same time, she didn’t think there was sight more right than having both those men by her bed.

She closed the door behind her back, locking it. Leaning against it, she sent both Bradley and Jake a playful look. “The room is soundproof.” She casually said not even attempting to hide her grin.

Bradley smirked to her words, slowly walking closer to her. “So bold,” he pushed a hand on the door next to her head, leaning closer to her, “why are you telling him this?” He brushed his lips over hers, teasing her with a kiss that never came.

Bradley sent a side glance over to Jake as he too moved closer to them. They both smirked.

She gasped, trying to breathe and keep her cool at their closeness, already struggling to think straight as it was.

She answered her husband with a quick shrug, pretending to be naïve, giving him an innocent look, but Bradley wasn’t so easily fooled. He slowly shook his head, grabbing her chin and bringing her to raise her head to look at him directly. “No. You must let us know now, my love. I am curious. Hangman? Are you not curious?”

“So fucking curious.”

She bit her lower lip, looking right into her husband’s dark eyes. The scorching hot desire that melted through his gaze gave her a shiver. “You know why.”

“Do I? Oh- my darling,” Bradley slid his hands lower on her body. His widened palms caressed her thighs, softly sliding over her nightgown as he followed her body all the way up to her hips and ribs and chest, only brushing his fingers on her breasts, not giving her the satisfaction to fill his palms with them, “is it, maybe, because you want to inform the Lieutenant that he can make you scream, in here?” He hooked his fingers on the thin nightgown straps, pushing them over her shoulders. “Or is it because you want us to do exactly that to you?”

A strong, electrical shiver crossed her. “Bradley-” she gasped, desperately looking for air, looking right into his eyes as he pulled the loose, thin material of her nightgown over her body, letting it pool on the floor. “What, my sweet?” He wondered, scooping her face up in his palms. “Shall we show Jake?”

As soon as he called the other man out, her eyes rolled on him. She purred, stretching against her husband as he pressed his hands on her naked skin, while she enjoyed watching Jake studying her body. His green eyes were captivated by her. She loved to see that look on him, especially while his lips were slightly departed, his cheeks reddened, and his hair ruffled. God, she didn’t know if she would have survived that night.

She turned back to Bradley, silently nodding, she knew that she was giving him permission to pleasure her and, God, there was nothing she desired more. Bradley didn’t appear to be waiting for anything else either. He was on her in a second.

He leaned in for a heated kiss, rolling an arm around her waist, bringing her to pull her hips closer to him, only to grant him access to his free hand. He didn’t fiddle around, his only purpose was to give her pleasure and, to let Jake know exactly what was happening, he let go of her mouth, lowering himself to assault her neck instead.

Emily rolled her arms around his solid, wide shoulders, grasping on his figure, unable to balance herself on her own legs as he brushed skilfully his fingers through her dripping wet, hot folds, knowing exactly how and where his wife liked to be touched. She rubbed her nose on the side of his face, through his short sideburn, inhaling deeply a full breath of his scent, willingly releasing a whimper to his ear, enjoying feeling him tremble under her hold.

Then her eyes lazily moved to Jake. A shiver crossed her back as their eyes crossed. He was standing close enough but didn’t dare to interfere with them. Though, his gaze was crazed. She liked to think it was because he wanted to touch her too. She let him see her expression marked by pleasure, departed lips, reddened cheeks, and frowned eyebrows.

Emily welcomed her husband pushing two fingers inside of her with a loud gasp, immediately melting into a moan, as soon as he started rolling his thumb on her clit syncing with his fingers, hitting her exactly where she needed to unravel.

She came again. That second time she didn’t hold back, not afraid to be heard and risk waking her kids, she cried her husband's name as her orgasm washed over her. Though, all the way through the waves of her highest pleasure, she never broke eye contact with Jake. She wanted him to be part of it and she wanted to see his expression as he watched her come.

As soon as her orgasm dissipated, while her legs still trembled and her breath was still broken, Bradley turned her around. He held her with her back against his chest, letting Jake look directly at her naked body.

“Isn’t she beautiful?” He wondered proudly.

She let her head fall backwards on his shoulders, looking over at Jake with heavy eyelids as the man studied every inch of her naked skin. His eyes feasted on every soft curve of her body, indulging on her breasts, hips and thighs. “She is perfect,” he breathed, “you are a lucky bastard, Rooster.”

“Now do you understand why I can’t have enough of her?” A shiver crossed her back as the two men sent each other a complicit look. God, she couldn’t breathe.

Bradley pressed his proud smile on her temple in a soft kiss, brushing his fingertips on her neck and Emily too smiled, offering Jake a satisfied smirk, leaning against her husband. “Do you want to fuck me, Jake?”

“Oh, honey-” he choked on his own breath, now finally moving closer to them. As soon as the hands of both men were on her, she lost her mind. Jake responded to her question stealing her lips in a famished kiss. He wrapped his hands around her hips, pulling her away from Bradley’s hold and against his own chest. Which she didn’t mind at all. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and, even if she wasn’t done, she bit on his lower lips, breaking their kiss. “Take off your clothes, Lieutenant.” She commanded him with an encouraging nod.

Looking back at her husband, Emily slid a hand across his chest in an affectionate caress. “You too.”

That said, she slid off their arms and walked towards the bed, a hundred per cent intentioned in enjoying the show. She climbed on the bed and kneeled in its centre, knowing the two men’s attention was on her. Looking back at them, she offered a smile, waiting.

Jake glanced at Bradley, offering him one of those sharp, cocky grins that always took her breath away, even when he was being an asshole. “I never realised how bossy your wife could be, Rooster.”

Bradley’s eyes never lifted from her, though to the other’s words he too pulled out his infamous side smirk able to make her head spin.

God, how were they that gorgeous? And how did she end up there?

“That’s my girl,” he winked proudly at her, “I hope that is not a problem, Hangman.”

“Are you joking?” Now Jake’s gaze was back on her too, his grin became even sharper, like the one of a shark. “It’s a turn-on.”

She had to bite her tongue not to shout at them to hurry up and get in there.

She had a better idea.

She stretched, only because she wanted them both to look at her move. “You are both still dressed.” She reminded them, sliding her own hands on her body. She pressed her palms on her abdomen and hips and up, cupping her own breasts, releasing a sigh. “You don’t want me to be alone for too long, do you?”

That was enough of an incentive for them both. She watched them strip with a hungry smirk printed on her face.

Her eyes lazily studied her husband’s body, crossing every inch of his golden skin and the edge of his muscles. Her body reacted to him instantly. She could never be tired of him. He was a big man, tall and large, and she was made to be held by his arms. Her warm gaze slid over his torso and abdomen, as she unashamedly followed the dark, happy trail under his belly button to his erection. God, her husband’s cock had the power to make her drool. A shiver crossed her. Only thinking about having him inside of her made her core ache with desire.

Bradley moved slowly, enjoying having her attention. He climbed the bed next to her and met her with a soft kiss. For a moment, that specific moment, she forgot they weren’t alone. She threw her arms around his neck, sliding a hand through his dark hair, deepening their kiss. As their tongue met, she welcomed his flavour with a pleasureful sigh, as if she had never tasted it before.

Though, tucking at her hips, giving her a soft pull, Bradley broke their kiss, stopping her from climbing over his figure taking what she most needed. She hissed, disagreeing, but he was ready to soothe her, scooping her cheeks between his hands. “It would be so selfish of me to distract you from poor Hangman, don’t you think.”

“Yeah. A very low hit, Rooster.” As soon as Jake spoke, she sent him a quick look. She bit her lip but didn’t dare to look further than his face. Not yet. Even if she was dying to explore his body.

How long had it been since she started secretly fantasizing about that specific moment?

Bradley offered her a grin, encouraging her to move to Jake with a nod. “I know you want to.” He whispered, laying back on the mattress as if he was getting ready to enjoy the view.

Holding her breath, she finally turned towards Jake and moved towards the edge of the bed, meeting him. Their eyes locked and her heart flattered.

“Are you blushing, Mrs Bradshaw?” He asked softly, pushing his index under her chin, to inspect her expression. She could barely hide her smile, suddenly feeling shy and seen. “Maybe,” she hesitated, looking up at him, “are you sure this is what you want?”

“What of my behaviour made you believe I am nothing but ready, honey?”

“I am a married woman.” She reminded him and Jake sent a playful look over her shoulder, offering a challenging smirk to Bradley. “Oh, do not let me ever forget that Rooster got to you first, baby.”

She still didn’t dare to touch him, for a moment, seriousness crossed her. “You know what I mean, Jake.”

He nodded; his grin didn’t disappear. “I want you,” he looked over her shoulder once more, “if that means sharing you with your husband, then baby count me in.”

That was it. She took his words as seriously as she would a signature on a binding contract. Bradley’s compliant about her displayed affection towards another man was everything she needed to know about how he felt on the topic.

There was chemistry sparking in the air and she couldn’t fight the magnetic force connecting her to him. She slid her hands across his naked chest, hesitating only a second before touching his skin, siding her fingers through his chest hair. She studied his edges following the movements of her own fingertips across his torso, shoulders and arms.

His skin was warm, his body solid, covered in defined muscles, he was slightly shorter than Bradley but bigger. She slid her hand across his throat, softly caressing his skin, rolling her eyes on his face, studying his features as her fingers followed across the strong line of his square jaw and chin, over his thin lips. Jake’s grip on her chin became firmer as he pulled her in a famished kiss, sliding an arm around her waist, clearly unable to wait any longer.

As their bodies collided, Emily wrapped her arms around his shoulders, grabbing on his figure, pulling him close, as he did to her. One of his large hands cruised across her back, feeling her stretching under his palm, while the other grabbed her ass. It was a rude clutch on her soft flesh that made her purr.

Feeling his erection proudly pressing on her abdomen, her stomach growled and her soaked core ached. He was big and heavy. No, she wouldn’t have survived that night. Between him and her husband, she knew she would have gotten fucked so much that she would have struggled to walk straight the next day.

God, one could only hope.

“I need you, Jake.” She pleaded, whispering on his lips. Jake’s response was a sharp, cocky, extremely confident smile. “Do you, honey? What is it that you need?”

“I need you to fuck me, Hangman. Now.”

He listed his chin to her determined look, she saw his pale eyes glimmer as if that was exactly what he wanted to hear. He gave her a push and then turned over between his arms, now having her back pressed against his chest. “You are such a little devil, aren’t you, baby?” He pushed his face into her neck socket, smirking against her ear. “You are not a good girl, are you? You are very, very bad.” He wrapped one of his strong arms around her hips, pulling her towards him, rubbing himself against her ass. “You want me to fuck you while your husband watches, so fucking naughty.”

“S-shit, Jake,” she sighed, her eyes rolling on Bradley as he laid on his side, his hand wrapped around his cock as he slowly massaged himself. She choked. “Bradley.”

Calling for her husband only prompted Jake to give her a push, bending her in front of him. He slid his hands across her thighs, first the outside and then, his fingers teased her, following her most sensitive skin on the inside, encouraging her. “Yeah, baby, spread those legs for me.”

She was blinded by desire by then. Her mind was fogged, everything she could think about was the cold feeling of air hitting her exposed skin and her aching, empty loins waiting to be filled.

As she arched her back, in an automatic response, Jake sighed in approval, rewarding her with a playful slap on her ass. Then he dug his fingers through her folds, grunting in approval finding her still so hot and wet. “Oh, your husband did such a good job, preparing you for me.”

“Please, Jake-” as she begged him, her hands opened on the mattress, her arms already shaking under the pressure, her look got lost in the vision of Bradley pleasuring himself looking at her devotedly. She licked her lips.

He didn’t give her a warning, but he did give her exactly what she wanted. Jake positioned himself and slid inside of her in one, sharp, thrust. He stretched her completely, taking her breath away. She had been so wet and ready for so long that her body easily welcomed his size. They both moaned as she melted in a victorious smile. “F-fucking finally.”

“Shit, you are so fucking perfect, honey.” Jake moved his hips, giving her the chance to adapt to him, grabbing on her hips. “Your wife has such a sweet pussy.”

She only saw Bradley’s proud smile, as he nodded to Jake, but she suspected the man behind her was pulling the cockiest smirk. “Yes, she does, Hangman. Now,” Bradley shuffled closer to her, “be a gentleman and give her exactly what she asked for.”

Following Bradley’s blessing, Jake pushed his hips against her. He started slowly, teasing her, sliding all the way out and back in but his thrusts soon quickened.

Every one of his pushes made her pleasure grow, bringing her to unashamedly moan for him, as the pressure of a new, rising orgasm nested across her stomach.

Jake’s hands were solidly holding onto her hips as he fucked her from behind, guiding her to slide upon his cock. He was holding her so tightly it almost hurt, almost, because her pleasure was much greater, enough for her to forget about discomfort.

Plus, she was hoping his clutch would leave bruises on her skin. There was something so profound, so intimate, about being marked during sex, and she loved to have her skin bearing the traces of passion.

Bradley kneeled in front of her and softly wrapped his hand around her chin, bringing her to look up at him. For a few moments, he only watched as the pleasure given by another man bent her features, but then he slid his thumb across her departed lips. “Do you think I could fuck your sweet mouth while he fucks you, darling?”

She nodded giving him a grateful, desiring look. She couldn’t formulate words but God if she wanted that. To choke on her husband’s dick as Jake fucked her brains out? It was such a taboo thought she felt dirty – but only for a moment.

Bradley positioned himself, sliding a hand through her hair in a praising caress, as with the other he held her chin up, helping her balance herself. She leaned in, sliding her tongue across his shaft, from base to tip, enjoying hearing his sigh of approval. She closed her lips around the tip of his cock, sucking on it and playing with it with her tongue, and then she pulled him deeper into the back of her throat. Bradley grabbed her hair. And Jake clutched on the soft edges of her hips, digging his cock deeper inside of her. So much she thought she felt his hit in her stomach.

They all moaned.

She had never felt so filled up and she loved it. It made her skin shiver and her stomach tremble as pleasure buzzed through her entire being, making her arms and legs shake. She savoured the feeling of both their hands on her, as the warmth of both their bodies seeped through her skin. So lost in the pleasure Jake was giving her and in the devotion, she was determined to show her husband as he fucked her throat, she didn’t even recognize the waves of an orgasm growing on her. To the point that, when she came, it was a surprise.

“Fuck, baby, yes. Come for me. Such a good girl.” As Jake praised her, guiding her through her orgasm with unforgiving thrusts, Bradley pulled back, granting her the possibility to voice her pleasure. He scooped her face up, making her look at him. “Are you coming, darling?”

She was only able to roll her eyes, nodding, unable to speak if not for convulsed whimpers.

Jake didn’t stop. His thrusts kept coming through her trembling flesh. He guided her through her high and then right into overstimulation. Unforgiving and perfect. As her strength left her, he was ready to grab her a moment before she folded on the mattress. Jake pulled her up, so her shoulders were pressed against his chest. He held her tight with an arm around her waist and a hand wrapped around her throat. “Oh, we are not done, honey.” His whisper sounded so sweet and yet so threatening.

She looked up at him, helpless, only able to whimper as her tired flesh was changing up again for more pleasure she didn’t even know she had. She felt like she could break under such pressure. Jake’s fingers slid around her jaw, holding her as he nodded proudly. “C’mon, baby, give me another, I know you have it in you.” He then pulled her chin, turning her towards Bradley, “Let your husband see you coming on my cock again.”

Jake slid his free hand between her thighs, easily finding her clit that he proceeded to massage, still pounding inside of her, breaking her breath with every hit. She grabbed his arm, digging her nails through his skin, doing her best to find something to hold onto as a new wave of pleasure washed over her. This second orgasm was so powerful that it blinded her for a moment. She cried out loud, calling for Jake’s name multiple times, as he guided her through her pleasure, this time properly, granting her the chance to catch her breath, indulging her satisfied body, supporting her. He whispered sweet praises to her ear, welcoming her pleasure with pure satisfaction.

As soon as he loosened his hold around her, Emily thought she could fall, but Bradley was there to catch her. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders as her husband took her away from Jake’s arms and laid her on the mattress. He caressed and kissed her sweaty skin, praising her, granting her the possibility to rest her quivering body for a moment.

He softly pecked kisses on her lips, cheeks and jaw. “Are you ok, my love?”

She was only able to nod, fatigued, short of breath, maybe even tired, but not at all satisfied, besides the fact that her belly still vibrated with the echoes of the deep pleasure Jake just gave her. Bradley softly kissed her chin as she looked for Jake with a grateful look.

He was still standing by the edge of the bed, catching his breath, looking at her as her arms and legs now wrapped around her husband’s body. She pulled a hand towards him, sliding it on the messy sheets. “Come here.” She whispered, inviting him.

Jake obeyed, but not before looking for Bradley’s approval as well. He climbed onto the bed and laid next to her as she lazily caressed his chest with a hand and her husband’s back with the other.

She looked at them both, before leaning in to kiss Bradley first and Jake after.

“I hope you don’t think this is it,” she whispered, now turning towards Bradley directly. She followed his jawline with her fingertips, offering him a cheeky smile. “I want more.”

“More, uhm?” Bradley leaned in on her neck, tracing a trail with his lips only to stop on her collarbones, nibbling on them. “You are insatiable.”

She giggled softly, sliding a hand through his hair. “That’s right, Mr Bradshaw,” she turned towards Jake, sending him a cheeky look. “I want to show him how I can ride my husband’s cock.” She winked at Jake, rolling on top of Bradley.

Bradley welcomed her words with a giggle helping her straddle him, placing his hands around her hips. She enjoyed the view, looking down at her husband first, pushing her hands on his chest, and Jake after. Her gaze indulged on his glorious body and still erected cock. She bit her lower lip, leaning closer to him. “Can you touch yourself for me, as I fuck him?”

Jake let his head fall backwards, releasing a sigh, a moment before jumping up and grabbing her throat, pulling her into a kiss. Bradley didn’t intervene. He only slid his hands across her torso, around her ribs, keeping her in position. “Only for you.” Jake whispered against her lips.

Then, she pushed him away and as he fell back on the mattress, she turned her attention to Bradley. She leaned forward, brushing her lips against his. “Did you like seeing another man fuck your wife?” She teased him sliding her nails across his chest.

Bradley gulped loudly and then he nodded, his hands moving across her back, all the way down around her ass, as he grabbed her, pressing her against his hips. “I did.” Hissing, she rubbed her wet core on Bradley’s erection. “Do you want to fuck me, now?”

“I do.” He pushed himself slightly up, only enough to catch her lips in a famished, desperate kiss.

She didn’t wait much longer. Pushing a hand between their bodies she positioned him to her entrance and slid above him, taking every inch of his length. She pulled herself up, pushing on his chest and let her head fall backwards, welcoming his size with a moan. “Fuck, Lieutenant, you feel so good.”

She admired him as he welcomed her tight hold with departed lips and glimmering eyes fogged by desire.

The second she started moving her hips against his, he grabbed at her waist, digging his fingers deep into her soft flesh. She rolled her eyes, hissing away her hidden, animalistic desire for him to leave marks where Jake’s fingers had signed her already.

Pleasure immediately started to build inside of her, firing up her nerves, and gathering pressure around her stomach. The more she was given, the more she desired, it was like a sweet curse. And she started to doubt she could really reach satisfaction.

She looked over at Jake, willingly rolling her hips on Bradley’s cock only to see him mirroring her movement with his hand clutched around his erection. God, those two men, lost in their pleasure, laying underneath her, were gorgeous. The two most beautiful men she had ever laid eyes upon. Both were hers at that specific moment.

She stretched, with absolutely no patience or desire to take it easy. She moved her hips up and down Bradley’s cock at a voracious pace and he let her choose the rhythm she desired, giving her everything she wanted. Understanding her need to get off once more, and being more than supportive of her desires, Bradley placed his hand on her lower abdomen, rubbing her clit with his thumb.

She came again. This time, as violent as the one before. Blinded by pleasure, her strength leaving her the second her body came undone, she abandoned herself between her husband’s arms, crying out his name. Bradley sat up, catching her, offering her his chest to rest upon, as he guided her hips to ride out the waves of her orgasm.

Emily held tightly on his shoulders, sliding the other hand between his hair as she pushed her lips close to his ear. “I love you.” She whispered softly, calming down, feeling so safe and warm between his arms, all the while looking into Jake’s eyes.

A distant thud brought her back to consciousness with a gasp.

Emily laid still for a long second, before even realising she was actually awake, and that she could stretch. As soon as she moved her entire body ached. Muscles she didn’t even know she had were sore as the memories of the past night came back to her. Jake. Bradley. And the sex. And all the pleasure. God, she had never known it was humanly possible to come as many times as she did.

Both Jake and Bradley had no mercy for her. Or indulged her too much in her never-ending appetite. Now, she wasn’t sure she would have been able to walk. A placid smile still melted on her lips.

Just then, she realised she was tangled in a hug between the two men she fell asleep with. Her smile only widened. Her husband had no reason to leave her side, but she was truly happy to see that Jake stayed. As she lazily traced a caress with her fingers across Jake’s back, laying on one of her sides, Bradley tuck her closer to him, squeezing her between his arms against his chest.

He pressed a sleepy kiss on her temple. “Good morning, my love.”

She ran her hands across his arms wrapped around her naked body, releasing a sigh, snuggling against him. “Hello, darling.”

She turned just enough to brush her lips under his chin, and then she pulled herself closer to Jake, brushing a soft kiss on his shoulder. He twitched, reacting to her immediately, lazily rolling closer, pressing his face against her chest. He only mumbled words that didn’t make any sense as she kissed his forehead.

Then that peaceful picture was suddenly disturbed by tiny giggles, followed by small footsteps running all around the corridor.

Emily gasped, but Bradley was quicker to react. As soon as he recognised it was the kids, he was immediately on his feet. “I’ll take care of it,” he fondly kissed the top of her head, “you sleep some more.”

“Don’t I get a kiss?” Jake chuckled wrapping her figure between his arms, taking over what Bradley had left. Receiving only a burst of sardonic laughter from the other, Jake lifted his head, looking at her. “Guess not.” She giggled, shaking her head, giving him a small push, as he tried to kiss her.

“How about I come and help?” He offered himself sending a quick look to Bradley, “so you, honey, can take some time to chill.”

“That would be great, Hangman.” Bradley agreed, becoming slightly agitated as they heard the kids singing a little song, calling for them from the corridor. It didn’t take long for the door to be tackled by small hands.

Jake kissed the tip of her nose a second before rolling out of bed. “If you get the kids, I’ll cook breakfast.”

“Oh, look at you,” Bradley sent him a quick side look, “you fuck my wife one night and now you think you are the king of the castle.” Jake laughed at his words, nodding. “What can I say, Rooster, I am that good.”

[popbloganddropit]

Bleachers - Bleachers

Initial Thoughts: The album feels deeply introspective. I need to sit with lyrics and vibe to fully form an opinion. No immediate standouts.

1. I Am Right On Time- a solid opening thesis statement. This a Bleachers album, there will be nostalgic references and it will be vaguely (or as of late, more and more overtly) New Jersian. “My mind is mirrors, don’t know what is and what’s reflection. The future’s past and I am right on time,” left an imprint on me. I like the evolution of the band becoming more and more involved in the records. This is a standard Bleachers track, not lacking, but nothing exceptional. 3.5/5

2. Modern Girl- I’m a such a sucker for a saxophone, and it’s responsible for the energy in this song along with the We Didn’t Start the Fire-esque shouty list verses. Would shake my ass to it a bit, guess I’m a Modem Girl. 4/5

3. Jesus Is Dead- The cadence this song is chanted in is not pleasing to my ears. This and the lyrics give off the air of a bad Weezer impression (a poor impression of Weezer or an impression of Weezer when they make bad music? You decide). There’s tiny glimmers of good (“Jesus is dead and so’s New York, I built a place right down the shore. It’s nice”.) and I would bet this song is fun live, but it’s a skip for me. 1.5/5

4. Me Before You- the songwriting reminds me of a classic Bleachers hit even though it’s slower and quieter. Antonoff sings in a breathless manner that fits the yearning lyrics. And I enjoyed the jaunty little outro to take us out. 4.5/5

5. Alma Mater- This was my favorite of the songs released before the album. Love the surprise Lana vocals and there are points that flirt with being Bon Iver falsetto-esque. I don’t really get why we’re screaming “fuck Balenciaga”. It takes me out of the mood of the rest of the song and doesn’t fit. 4/5

6. Tiny Moves - Jack enters his“I Love My Wife” era with this cute little number. It’s not generic, but is missing a really hard hitting lyric or something else to really take it over the top for me. 4/5

7. Isimo - I’m also a sucker for a good “shalala,” which is tastefully tucked in to the sentimental (boulder) lyrics that sound like Jack is rooting just for you. 4.5/5

8. Woke Up Today- A simple love song with some real humdinger lyrics. “Woke up today and I was right, my winning ticket in her eyes”. “But if faith is a chance, then I can believe I would deserve every breath I see you breathe”. Oof, the man is in love. Missing something to really take it over the top for me, but a beautiful little romance. 4/5

9. Self Respect- a sad boy anthem for the ages, with an assist from the always welcome Florence Welch. A boy boygenius-esque depressed wallower. And sometimes I am tired of having self respect. I don’t know if I love the Kobe/Kendall lines but I’ve certainly heard worse things. The random modern references just really snap me out of the mostly nostalgic vibes Jack likes to invoke. 4/5

10. Hey Joe- An Aaron Dessner collab, with Claud vocal! I like this upbeat, but contemplative song. 4/5

11. Call Me After Midnight- I don’t get anything out of this song. It sounds a bit like a The 1975 reject that didn’t need to be on their record or this one. It’s fine enough, it just doesn’t have a moment that hits hard enough to justify its existence. 2.5/5

12. We’re Gonna Know Each Other Forever- this track has a beautiful, captivating instrumental and pleading, pensive words. The narrator feels frozen and helpless and the screams at the end really punctuate the conversation. 4/5

13. Ordinary Heaven- This sounds like a closing track to me, but there’s still one more song left. The vocal layering is well done, but the song is a bit repetitive and long for me and the spoken sample doesn’t add what it needs to add. 2.5/5

14. The Waiter- I find the autotune effect too grating to enjoy anything else about this track. Going to be a skip for me every time, and an unfortunate way to end an album I would overall say I enjoyed. 1/5

Final Thoughts:

I think one of the album’s biggest flaws is that it lacks energy, an abnormal complaint for a Bleachers record. Some artists kill a slow, sentimental ballad (and there are several Antonoff-produced simple piano ballads I’d list as favorites of all time), but Bleachers’ strength for me has always been scream in your car with the windows down anthems (“Don’t Take the Money” isn’t even particularly fast, but I feel it in my soul more than this collection of songs). Releasing both“Tiny Moves” and “Modern Girl” before album release was a misstep when those are the highest the energy reaches on the album and neither of those. There was such a nice run of songs I enjoyed in the last half of the record that was really brought back down by the ending few. There are some songs I will return to, but probably not this record as a whole. The average score was 3.32 and I will keep it there rather than round up or down because I think rounding down is too harsh, but there’s not enough for me to round up. 3.3/5

Top 3:

Me Before You, Isimo, Woke Up Today

What’s Next?

I’m definitely interested in the bonus tracks from this album once they are released on streaming. Hoping to get Deeper Well out quickly so we can fully enter our Cowboy Carter era 🤠. There are a couple deluxe/EP’s that got released last week (Olivia Rodrigo, Hozier, possibly Tyla’s album?👀) that I’d like to get to as well. Next Friday, Orville Peck will be releasing an album as well, so please keep your cowboy hats and fringe securely fastened.

Let me know your thoughts about Bleachers and what upcoming releases you’re excited for!

[xspilltheteapleasex]

Life Is In The Souls of Birds

A Poem by xspilltheteapleasex

My Main Masterlist

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶

My Poetry & Art Masterlist

A day as ordinary as any other can be full of beautiful and curious little things,

Moments that bring joy and peace like this one can be remembered for a lifetime,

But it only takes a second for things to change and fade away, no matter how hard you cling,

Everything will have its chance at life and its chance to pass at the right time.

Anyone can do anything, and anyone can take away the chance for something,

Maybe the chance at blossoming into a beautiful flower or the chance for dedication to commit,

Taking away a moment of joy and peace leading to destroying the beauty of life like a bombing,

So I think it would be best, yes, very much so,

It would be best if you put that back where you found it.

A little birdie with its black feathers sleek and smooth,

Glistening under the sun with little sparkles every time it turns his head,

The knight in shining armor adorning a vibrant red splotch with meaning of sleuth,

Jumping along the many tree branches of his mighty kingdom bred.

Birdies that twitter and flutter about with a song in their mouths,

All of this can be taking away if you steal their wings and souls,

No care in the world, they didn't ask for this, can you at least put them in the ground,

You shouldn’t be in charge of what jewels your body, for only God is at the controls.

Those many tree branches belong to a fortress of solitude,

A tree who upholds the very breath of every living thing we call life,

Weaving roots throughout the earth that no one can allude,

Whom some call home, a place to escape the fear of strife.

Billions upon billions of fortresses are destroyed each year,

No one gives another thought to saving their much needed lives,

Am I the only one seeing how our situation is this horrific and severe,

Can we not just follow the will our God gave us to abide?

Geese fly overhead of all the forest and under the misty clouds,

Loud as can be to announce their grateful presence,

They never break formation and they never stop making sound,

One day they will leave again, but I know they will once again show their luminescence.

Pillows are what I use to lower my head and have magnificent dreams of love,

Cushioning cotton or memory foam will do just fine for me to close my eyes,

So why do we need the best pillow that leave geese in cold blood,

God made these noble creatures for our kind to take care of with our hearts.

The wondrous lake is where the geese lay the wings and take a rest,

Making ever so little creases in this body of water and leaving behind traces of beautiful down,

Basking in the vigorous fountain of never ending droplets which it has expressed,

Our beautiful lake is my queen with a solid rim atop her head as a glorious crown.

Water is the something that every living thing needs in his temple of a body,

It provides an oasis for creatures and plants alike,

Yet we still feel the need to dump our garbage into the sea and turn it snotty,

Polluting the quality, which makes for a great realization of your throat being hit with a spike.

A rim holds place for little children to rest their little feet and have some fun and play,

Pitter-patter on the rim of rocks holding the foundation for centuries,

Just an excuse needed only for me to gaze upon such beauty of life, whom am I to say,

Rocks can be eroded with time, but etched forever are our wonderful memories.

Smoke and ashes rise above our children heads and strikes fear into their eyes,

Take care of your children and hold them tight as can be,

Your neighbor just started a fire that grows and grows as implied,

It started from his mouth but spread into the size of the northern sea.

My gaze is interrupted by an alarming siren warning of swiftness,

Quick must the siren's owner reach the fearful destination,

Praying with my hand and in my heart, with hope this lifts us,

God, oh please, please God, please help those of your own creation.

Taking the wings and soul of a little birdie is taking a life,

Chopping billions of trees is destroying the earth's fortress,

Starting fires in your mouths and littering them to the ground is the same as a thousand knives,

Can't you just stop for once, leave it, and support us?

Anyone can do anything, and anyone can take away the chance for something,

Maybe the chance at blossoming into a beautiful flower or the chance for dedication to commit,

Taking away a moment of joy and peace leading to destroying the beauty of life like a bombing,

So I think it would be best, yes, very much so,

It would be best if you put that back where you found it.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶

[kedsandtubesocks]

ERIKA PLEASE WE LIVE FOR THE SIMPLE MOMENTS WHERE THE WORLD IS KINDER!!!

it could be worse..... willow and i could have chosen Violence...

AND I AM GRATEFUL AND LOVE YOU BOTH OF THAT!!

But..because I’m a gremlin 👀

I’LL PICK VIOLENCE FOR ALL OF US 🔪

-˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖-

“I wish I could just…tell you everything.” He begins.

The weather is beautiful. There’s a warm breeze tickling in between you and him. You turn around with a curious look on your face the soft shade of the trees paints you in a dreamy type way.

“Tell me everything about what?” You ask.

Everything. And he means it.

How this lonely life of his is now illuminated from the inside out because of you. How you make feel weaker and stronger than ever.

And…

About how if he was another man, a normal man -

He would come home from work after teaching, a normal teaching job, and complain about how his students can’t be any more perfect because he is just that good of a teacher. He would steal bites from the secret cookie stash you try hiding from him as you prepare dinner. You’d catch him of course and scold him for being so childish.

You and him would stay up watching a new series you got him hooked on. He’d probably fight with a cat you so desperately begged him to get that has now taken over his time of cuddling you before bed. He’d go to sleep in your arms, smelling your shampoo and basking in your glorious warmth.

It would be simple. That life.

Simple and pure like waking up and breathing in the morning air after a storm that came the night before to only find peace in the morning rays.

Satoru can almost grasp it, feel it so real under his hands, like a dream he can remember on the tip of his tongue.

But, the words he wants to say to you clog his throat in a way that makes him feel as if he’s underwater.

He’s drowning among you and he doesn’t see a life raft in sight. But he’s okay with that. The strongest sorcerer has to be reminded of how human he is after all.

“Gojo?” You ask now furrowing your brows so cute and concerned.

Satoru thinks in that other world, one where the monsters under children’s beds aren’t real and the weight of the world doesn’t digs into his bones, he would have married you in the spring.

He can only imagine how sublime you would look cloaked in love under the spring blossoming cherry trees as you and him became one. Under the blooms his life would have been judicially tied to yours, as if that even matters though because he is so irrevocably tie to you now married or not. But to have a ring on his finger, to see you wearing his, that is what the springtime would have given him.

The flowers, the lovely weather, the chance to enjoy the time outside with you, he would give it all for you.

A gust of wind suddenly flutters and brings in some fallen petals. They scatter and bombarded him and you.

And as you laugh at the sudden surprise intrusion-

Gojo wakes up alone in his quiet bedroom.

It’s dark and the light of the moon illuminates his room as his only witness to remind him that no, he is not normal. And that other life? It’s just a crystalized dream breaking away. And besides, Satoru knows the spring and dreams are not meant to last long for men burdened with curses.

Because if you are his spring, then he is your winter and his bed has never felt colder, lonelier, than it does now.