#and i know it's not what he meant | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

novelconcepts · 4 months

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I Saw the TV Glow is such a uniquely, devastatingly queer story. Two queer kids trapped in suburbia. Both of them sensing something isn’t quite right with their lives. Both of them knowing that wrongness could kill them. One of them getting out, trying on new names, new places, new ways of being. Trying to claw her way to fully understanding herself, trying to grasp the true reality of her existence. Succeeding. Going back to help the other, to try so desperately to rescue an old friend, to show the path forward. Being called crazy. Because, to someone who hasn’t gotten out, even trying seems crazy. Feels crazy. Looks, on the surface, like dying.

And to have that other queer kid be so terrified of the internal revolution that is accepting himself that he inadvertently stays buried. Stays in a situation that will suffocate him. Choke the life out of him. Choke the joy out of him. Have him so terrified of possibly being crazy that he, instead, lives with a repression so extreme, it quite literally is killing him. And still, still, he apologizes for it. Apologizes over and over and over, to people who don’t see him. Who never have. Who never will. Because it’s better than being crazy. Because it’s safer than digging his way out. Killing the image everyone sees to rise again as something free and true and authentic. My god. My god, this movie. It shattered me.

#i saw the tv glow #I saw the tv glow spoilers #it is SUCH a queer story #the disassociation. the hiding in fiction to feel alive.#the horror of watching time tick by and knowing you’re not who you’re meant to be #the unique paralysis of staying put in hell because it’s safer than what might be over the horizon #the tragedy of trying to help someone who isn’t ready to be helped #god it’s so much. god. rarely do I walk out of a film and just stare soundlessly into space #anyway. please see this movie. although I sort of hope if you’re reading this post it’s cuz you already have #eta: I used he because the main character never quite vocalizes another pronoun #but this is SUCH a trans story. suuuuch a trans story. it is not even a little subtle #it’s so good and so so painful

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vicariouseyes · 1 year

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#i know its the RSD and the fact that my meds have most likely worn off for the day #and i know it's not what he meant #but when i show my partner one of those what color do i give off style memes with personality traits #and he says none of them fully fit but one of them is closest #like #i asked which trait of the three listed under the one he picked didn't fit #the three listed for that color were gentle supportive and sensitive #his stance was that he didn't think of supportive as being a personality trait but based on a series of actions #i can see his point of view #but like #supportive is absolutely a thing a person can be in general my dude #now I'm just laying here thinking he doesn't think I'm supportive #which hurts if true because I've been nothing BUT supportive of him the entire time we've been together #but i know it's the RSD talking and his possible/probable autism being purely analytical and direct in that moment #and I'll clear it up with him tomorrow #just sucks to go to bed feeling out of sorts #he already went to bed though #and it's his birthday so i don't wanna get into a whole insecure semantic discussion rn anyway #idk why he has to be like that though #he's always so supportive and patient and kind normally #and highly intelligent and emotionally literate #but sometimes he just doesn't understand seemingly basic shit and puts his foot in his mouth #like bro #you could just have said 'uhhh i think this one is closest' and left it at that #it didn't have to turn into a whole thing #now my feelings are hurt for no real reason because i understand where he was trying to go even though i disagree #but if i tell him my feelings are hurt he's gonna feel like shit #I'mma tell him anyway #just sucks to have a miscommunication that leads to insecurity

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turndecassette2 · 8 months

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#watercolour #art #tolkien #elf #feanor #or it was meant to be feanor but I was too lazy to google what hair colour he was supposed to have & I know some ppl care deeply about #those sorts of things #I need to re-read this book #just remember it being good tragedy #& the author cares about trees in a way I find strangely moving & sweet

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 2 days

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...Turns out gay sex actually was the solution.

(This is basically a redraw, come read the real deal over at Tiger Tiger)

#tiger tiger #jamis arlesi #arno #I like to think Arno meant that as an inside thought but it came out as an outside thought. He's rolling with it though.#He did cause a Catastrophic Yaoi event though.#Jamis my beloved. You have the heart of a maiden. The body of an Ox. The brain of a loyal dog.#This is a guy who's okay being attracted to another man but *NOT* aware he's in love or that he's bisexual.#We love him for this. My god. This man is crafted so perfectly. I need you all to at least give Tigers a chance for *him*.#I'm tricking you a little bit because you will actually also fall for Ludo and Luck and Remy and Honeyfoot and-#okay you get the point. There are so many amazing characters in this comic.#I just.. my joke comic of 'gay sex is the solution' feels so ominous now knowing a few weeks later that was going to be canon.#I feel like a jester and a prophet. I don't know if I should tell anymore jokes in fear of what I may predict.#I am putting my hands together for Ludo to get a good smooch in with [redacted] in dragon form.#Also predicting something very spooky is going to go down with the diving bell. We shall see!

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delicourse · 8 months

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i miss them a little if im gonna be honest

#mp100 #mob psycho 100 #kageyama shigeo #kageyama ritsu #hanazawa teruki #tome kurata #tsubomi takane #shou suzuki #deliart #i meant for the image to be like. after the end but i also didnt think about the hairstyle changes. sorry......#also i know i was like shou 100% has dwarf hamsters since he got 2 but u know what i dont care. golden hamster stan for life #im planning on getting one i've been checking out breeders near me so i can get a proper healthy one. there are so many good ones here too #i already am thinking on what color im gonna go for..getting picky even. something like offwhite.. silver pearl.. silver dove.. silver mink #jurys still out on wether im gonna get another female or not #i do love how big ladies get and their intense energy and work ethic. truly the most passionate creatures i've ever come across. inspiring.#but a lazy fluffy guy that just sits around and washes his balls all day does seem easier. less likely to climb my curtains.#i got distracted i love hamsters so much. look at my mop drawing now everyone

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goldensunset · 3 months

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when people refer to canon story-relevant kingdom hearts games as ‘spinoffs’ it makes me sad not only for the obvious reasons i always say but also bc like man i WISH this series had spinoffs. imagine what they could do if they had permission from nomura to truly go off the rails and ignore the greater canon for a second and just do some fun whimsical plotless thing in an alternate universe. imagine a fishing/boating game on destiny islands. kh fighting game. it is an injustice that we have been deprived of kingdom karts. can anyone hear me

#in terms of alternate gameplay and lack of reliance on plot #i feel like melody of memory is the closest thing kh has actually had to a spinoff #but even that is important in its own way in the end #union cross to a certain degree as well what with being an online multiplayer gacha type game #its original concept i would definitely classify as a spinoff game #bc it was set in a totally different world and time period and was supposed to be about customization and fun with friends #and nomura or someone said it wasn’t meant to be connected to the plot #but then like. he did very much go and give it a plot. like he went back on that almost immediately #and even then. given that the game is still very much combat and exploration #even from the beginning can it really be called a spinoff? it’s just kh in a different format #i’m talking like a game in which the objective is something totally different.#racing game or cooking game or fighting game or (another) rhythm game #ace attorney style detective game. dancing game. dude i don’t know #there are so many different flavors they could go with here #alas nomura is allergic to genuine whimsy which is hilarious given that this is a disney series #like he apparently was like ‘ohhh should we really let sora in smash? would it make sense in the story?’#my brother in christ surely we’re not supposed to interpret this as canon to kh right? right????#i guess it’s just that the kh franchise has a very specific pristine vibe he wants to maintain #which is disney shenanigans as a seasoning on top of a main dish of Stone Cold Serious Anime Plot #kingdom hearts #kh #mine: kh

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bluebugjay · 4 months

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I'm looking too far into it as always but Monty being a regular crow and then getting violently turned into a human without his permission for his owner's revenge plot, gaining human levels of emotion and intelligence and then having it all violently ripped away again without warning, assumably losing all of that human emotion and stuff is genuine psychological horror to me, especially when you factor in the whole being in a coma thing being a metaphor for his time as a crow with Esther like, is he ok?

#honestly if i think about it too hard it really freaks me out lol #cause like he wouldnt even have the capacity to mourn what he lost - he wouldnt even know what it meant to him #i hope hes ok #monty the crow #monty finch #dead boy detective agency #dead boy detectives #dbda

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bluebeetle · 8 months

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I saw someone say Astarion bg3 is "the most queer coded man ever" and yeah. Its. Its because hes queer. He has canonically slept with men. He will date women, men, and nonbinary folks. "Queer coding" you mean the literal text they coded into the fucking game?

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #astarion #astarion ancunin #i mean we know what they really meant which is #“i think he acts Too Gay so he cant into women or anything and also i dont respect Bisexuals as queer ppl obvs”#but like. cmon.#txt #q slur #hall of fame

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fence-time · 6 months

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*Placing this down and scuttling away*

#fence posts #hermitblr #I . I don’t even know if I wanna tag anything else ikm too scared. this was meant to be a safe place AWAY from the cc’s ..#WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE MIGHT SEE THIS.#impulsesv #(<scared but I need to keep these darn tags organised… sigh..)#this is targeted btw #you know who you are.

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zivazivc · 9 months

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this came to me in a dream

Floyd's emo ass and a techno troll could make scene kids...! Do you see my vision??? . . . Ravin is Happy Hardcore and Eddy M is Synth-Pop, that's how troll genetics work, right?

anyway...

i don't think floyd leads a proud life

#this is meant as crack but you know he booked from there like no tomorrow #just being honest #trolls #dreamworks trolls #trolls 3 #trolls band together #trolls floyd #techno trolls #my art #trolls oc #ravin #eddy m #someone pat me on the back because of the names #scene #scenecore #the only acceptable way for scene trolls to be conceived is with the help of drugs lmao #i completely redid ravin's hair like 4 times to get it right...#anyway #you can't convince me that floyd left to go peruse a solo career at the age of what 13? and didn't get at least a little fucked up #you can't tell me a kid musician traveling alone with his gay little earring wouldn't attract people with bad intentions #anyway.#eye strain #neon colors #happy hardcore #S3RL #synth-pop #Breathe Carolina #i feel like i should tag this mpreg... but i don't wanna #ex bandmates

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hinamie · 2 months

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binding vow

#my art #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #megumi fushiguro #fushiguro megumi #megumi #fanart #jjk fanart #done....collapses #up until 3am last night n sitting fr another 8 hours today to finish....#g o d #the things i do fr him.....#let it no longer b said that i only do elaborate paintings rife with symbolism tht feature gojo. megu my one true muse #as is Correct and Just #real talk tho i was just sketching th things i wanted to include without giving much thought to the Themes #w the exception being the spider lilies lmao I Know What Those Mean #but i ended up with a REALLY good life/death/marriage/loyalty thing going on????#w the lotus/spider lily being purity+rebirth/death #((not 2 mention 'far from the one he loves' like HELLO?????))#also w the temari balls being associated w femininity but having him dressed in groom's attire #like???? 90% unplanned but i ended up both cooking And eating #also happy 2 report that betta fish were kinder 2 me than the koi were :) no trouble from these lil guys #in fact everything abt this piece kind of came easily beyond the initial colour swatch??#thank u fr being an easy subject megu ilysm im sorry abt all the death imagery i dont mean it pls focus instead on th Life imagery :((((#i put a ring on it so u gotta wake up.....cant leave yuuji @ th altar ....#SPEAKING OF THE RING IK ITS ON THE RIGHT HAND we've been over this and its Okay #if i read a single comment .........#sorry 2 that one person who was like 'the next binding vow better be at itfs' wedding' ik this probably wasnt what u meant #but it did inspire me smile :)#anyway i need 2 stop looking at this its been over 24 hours

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technically-human · 1 day

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Can you draw something with Doom Patrol!Edwin and Netflix!Edwin?

Maybe something about Dp!Edwin talking about his feelings for Charles with N!Edwin?

It's just something I've been thinking of, make it a little angsty?<3

Glad you asked

ko-fi

#ask ask ask #dead boy detectives #dbda #payneland #edwin x charles #doom patrol #dead patrol #cw homophobia #i know there are a couple of people who enjoy my rambly tags so these are for u #first of all anon i'm sorry i used your request to continue my story lol #most of my comics are meant to be standalones BUT #the doom patrol and dead girl detectives are all happening in the same universe #and there is indeed series of events here!#this particular one is happening after dp!edwin's feelings were exposed but before they met the girls #with that out of the way #i know this is not as funny as most of my stuff #but dp!edwin's internalized homophobia is an important thign that can't just go away because his charles loves him back #and he does love him back! in this verse #dp!charles is the only one not struggling with his feelings for his partner #dbd!charles and charlotte still have ways to go #also dbd!edwin is in no way an expert in self-acceptance but he has learned some things #i considered having him mention simon but i decided it wasn't his place to out him #(even though he's dead u know)#so yeah what he says here isn't... great #he's still putting himself down and he's still not sure if his feelings for charles are actually a good thing #but he knows HE is glad he feels this way #because fuck it it's not like he'll go to hell for it #and even if he did... he would crawl his way out

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whoslaurapalmer · 2 months

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so in the book of bill there's a part where he gets a bunch of old ladies to make like, precious moments-style figurines of him called The Tri Angels Collection by PudgyLilDarlins, and I was immediately super amused and charmed by this one --