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#and im not saying people who who go should feel obliged to do this
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Also also it's literally just the first two eps people are lucky enough to have seen early, no one can say what else happens or the ending so wanting to know some things from the first two to get even more excited seems reasonable and I'm bothered by the holier than thou who are getting at fans who are actually tagging spoilers correctly and asking privately for spoilers with no intention of deliberately ruining it for someone else, like let us live a little and if you are privileged enough to see these screenings (if I wasn't broke I could have got London tickets since I'm off work next week but alas I'm poor 😭) so maybe just don't say anything if you're not gonna give a morsel of a spoiler. The show and everyone have put themselves here by allowing people to see it early like what did they think would happen?! Of course people wanna know things and get more excited so ya just saying if I'd have gone I'd be telling anyone who wanted to know every single juicy detail.
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eyndr · 2 years
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Just ranting, ignore me
SO! Its been a fuckin hell of a year so far yet the misery continues!! Tried to move, went all the way across the country because thats where the opportunity was, living arrangements fell through. Moved all the way back, and now after a week of struggling to acquire health insurance i was finally able to call my trans doc and tell them 'hey i have insurance again please give me my boy patches' and let me tell you, i've been getting antsy because i ran out of patches almost 3 weeks ago and i've been taking it for long enough now that i'm not really supposed to stop, since it could have adverse health consequences. Which I've been warned about before because with my previous insurance I had to hound them every fucking month for a year and a half for my monthly refill and there were times when i went a few weeks without. Like i know its a controlled substance but they just wouldn't put my refill request through for weeks unless i called them daily about it, going back and forth between the insurance, the docs office, and the pharmacy.
Now of course i told the new insurance 'hey i have this medication i need, i need to be sure u cover it' and they went 'yep we sure do :) ' so i said great here's my money. Just got off the phone with the doc who says my new insurance wont cover my testosterone patches, and i'm about to flip my shit but then doc says they DO cover the injections. So uhhhh i guess i have to get over my fear of needles REAL quick because i'm gonna be sticking myself with em every two weeks now i guess
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ginkgo-phyta · 4 months
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heyy do you write for hotch? If yes can I request a fic with hotch falling asleep on reader's shoulder on the jet. like there are so many fics with reader sleeping on his shoulder and he's all soft about it and lets her. how would the bau react to see their tough boss just cuddle up with his girlfriend after a long case (it can be established relationship or before that too). thanku!
A/N: im screaming HAHA i LOVE THIS! i made this an established relationship hehe i hope you enjoy, my love! 
tagged spencer reid x reader because i want more people to see this teehee pls dont hate me i have spencer fics yall should read if you havent already but also you should still read this too
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fluff, BAU!reader, gender-neutral reader, mention of cannon type violence/hostage situation/nothing explicit or detailed, 1.8k words
“Hey, you okay?” Your tired eyes peered up at Aaron as he neared your seat on the jet, tie loosened and top button of his shirt undone. He had just gotten off the phone with the section chief, who, undoubtedly, scolded him as if he were a wayward adolescent. Although the smile he offered you in response was tight lipped and less-than-giving, his eyes told a different tale. They softened as they met yours, shedding their cold and hard façade to reveal a weary truth, littered with hints of desperation. 
This case had been long and grueling, tensions insurmountably higher than usual with Erin Strauss breathing down Hotch’s neck, scrutinizing every decision he and the rest of the team made. You barely got a chance to talk to Aaron about how he was doing, always being waved off by the older man with “We can talk later,” or “It doesn’t matter right now, let’s focus on the case,”. Begrudgingly, you obliged, understanding there was no point in pushing him. It would only add to his stress. Although the case was solved, the end was arduous. The unsub had taken a hostage and, with the rest of the BAU’s input, the negotiation tactics went a different way than what Erin deemed appropriate. 
A heavy sigh parted Aaron’s lips as he slumped into his seat, you could practically see steam of stress billowing off of him. “It’s fine, everything’s fine.” He spoke quietly, eyes closed, but you could tell he didn’t believe it to be true. 
“Strauss tear you a new one?” Rossi piqued from across the table. 
The unit chief huffed out a short laugh. “Nothing out of the ordinary.” Rossi just nodded at this, turning his attention back to his notepad. Hotch looked to the rest of his team as they settled into their desired spots, “Let’s all get some rest, alright?” 
Everyone wordlessly nodded, not having to be told twice. 
Aaron lazily turned his head to you with a book in your lap, “You, too, Agent.” He gave you a playfully pointed look.
You breathed out a quiet chuckle, “I will, don’t worry.” You shut the book and turned to give your beloved undivided attention, gazing into his suddenly undecipherable, deep hickory eyes. “You wanna talk about it?” 
He gently shook his head, eyelids feeling heavy as his blinks became slower and slower, “At home,” he whispered, your stomach doing a somersault at the notion. Aaron tried to fight sleep for just a few seconds longer, wanting to just stare at you for a bit.
You faced him, head leaned against the headrest, smile so warm and endearing. The way you chuckled at him was like getting a glimpse of heaven. He couldn’t wait to go home and have you all to yourself. The feeling of your arms wrapped around him was his life raft in the tumultuous storm of his emotions. It was hard for him to express what he was feeling all the time, but with you around his walls of reinforced concrete tumbled. Aaron gave you a small, sleepy smile.
Before he could say anything else, you spoke up. “Sleep,” it was a simple command, and the usually stubborn man melted into his seat at your word. 
You took a couple minutes longer to watch him immediately fall into a deep slumber, his breaths becoming deeper and longer, lips parted ever-so-slightly, eyebrows twitching here and there. With a breathy laugh, you fought the urge to reach up and caress his face and move the little stray strands of hair off of his forehead, still aware that your coworkers could witness such an intimate moment. The two of you had begun dating five months ago, but it wasn’t until three months later that you broke the news to the team. 
It had been a long time coming; for quite a while everyone knew about the feelings you harbored for your boss- even Hotch himself knew. You didn’t do a very good job of hiding it, taking every opportunity you could to blithely flirt with him. Some might just assume you did so in a similar way to how Penelope and Derek toy with each other, but the profilers knew in the back of their minds it wasn’t the case. Aaron fought you at first, pleading with you to stop calling him “handsome”, “big man”, or even “honey” in one case. You never gave in, though, buckling down on your efforts upon seeing the way he would chuckle caught off guard and almost blush in many instances. Slowly yet surely, he gave in to your teases. You burrowed your way into the stoic man’s heart, creating a place you would die before giving up. Aaron didn’t even realize it was happening until his world came crashing down on him one fateful evening. 
A routine questioning of a suspect had led to you getting held hostage, the man whose house you went to turning out to be the unsub. This had happened many times before in the history of the BAU, but for some reason Aaron was more on edge. There was no covert entrance into the home and the unsub refused to open up a line of communication with the agents, leaving everyone in the dark wondering what the state of your wellbeing was. Aaron had begun pacing back and forth in the tent they had set up outside the house you were being held in, hands held to his head. 
“Hotch, it’s going to be okay.” Derek stepped forward, trying to calm his superior’s nerves. 
“He’s right, Aaron.” Rossi piped in. “We’ve dealt with this before, we can fix this.”   
“No,” Hotch murmured back, “This isn’t the same. It’s not the same.” His pacing didn’t let up. “This is my fault, I should have told someone to go, too. I could have prevented this.”
The others held unspoken conversations within the glances they shared. 
“Hotch-” Emily tried to speak up, to convince him that wasn’t the case.
“NO!” He yelled suddenly, stopping in his tracks. “You don’t understand, I can’t lose them!” His voice was heavy with despair, eyes wide in anguish.
All eyes were trained on him, his coworkers at loss for words at the confession. 
“I can’t lose them…” Aaron mumbled this himself before roughly pushing out of the tent.
You smiled to yourself as you took a last glance towards the sleeping man next to you before turning back to your book. Safe to say, you were incredibly shocked when Aaron showed up on your doorstep in the dark of the night all those months ago, soaked in the rain, kissing you with a sense of urgency before you could even ask him what he was doing there. You bit your lip at the memory, but shook it out of your head to try and focus in on the jumbled words swimming in your lap. From the get-go, the two of you decided you would remain extremely professional around your coworkers, and you did just that. You stopped your teasing, for the most part at least, and made sure to never initiate physical contact on the job. Anyone that didn’t already know you were in a relationship would never have guessed. The most you allowed yourselves was sitting next to one another on the jet, just like you were doing now. 
An unintelligible murmur and huff sounding from your side drew your short-lived attention away from the delicate pages in front of you. Just as you were about to look over to Aaron and make sure he was okay, a heavy weight thumped onto your shoulder. His head. You were taken aback, a giggle slipping through your lips before you could help it. Your fingers flew up to your mouth, trying to keep yourself quiet as you noticed him shift a bit, making himself more comfortable. Sure, you’d accidentally fallen against Hotch’s shoulder in your sleep a couple times before the two of you entered a relationship, but never in a million years did you expect him to do the same to you. On the jet. In front of everyone. Of course, he couldn’t control his actions in his sleep, you reasoned. And maybe you should gently shrug him off to help retain his authority around the teasing profilers. But, this time, you fought off that thinking and gave in to your instinct. He had been so tense and strung out this entire case, you knew he needed this.
To hell with professionalism. You thought with a devilish grin, happy in your resolution. And so, you gently closed your book and slid it onto the table in front of you, trying your best to move as little as possible before leaning your head against his own and closing your eyes. With the gentle hum of the jet engines and the comforting sounds of Aaron’s breathing, you were lulled into a wonderful slumber in no time.
“Oh my God,” Emily breathed out, garnering the attention of Spencer who rested in the same group of seats as her. He looked up at her with one eye from where he was slumped over in his window seat, trying to get some shut-eye. 
“Huh?” the sleepy doctor grumbled, pushing himself a bit more upright when he noticed Emily looking at something on the other side of the jet, her face a mixture of shock and glee. 
The raven-haired agent began slapping Derek’s shoulder, who sat peacefully next to her with his eyes closed and headphones over his ears. His eyes flew open, looking over to Emily with annoyance as he took off his headphones, “What! What!”    
Immediately Emily shushed him, “Look!” she whispered, hand flying wildly in the air, eyes still unmoving. 
Derek followed her line of sight the scene before him pulling a laugh of disbelief from his lungs. “Well, well, well…” 
Emily’s hands covered her mouth in astonishment. “JJ!” she whispered over to the blonde who lay curled up on the sofa next to them. “Ugh,” she groaned quietly, unable to wake her coworker. 
“I can’t believe this,” she whispered mostly to herself, settling back in her seat, garnering a shake of Morgan’s head.
The view of their hard-headed unit chief sleeping peacefully on the shoulder of his subordinate, the latter’s head resting sweetly back on his was suddenly blacked by the side of Rossi’s body as he stuck his arm out, trying to get the best angle to immortalize this moment on camera.
“Good for them,” Morgan grinned, his voice proudly announcing his amusement as he put his headphones back over his head.
“Rossi, you better send me that!” Emily spoke up just a little bit louder, the old man looking back and motioning his phone towards her in acknowledgement.
“What? What!?” Spencer whisper-yelled, unsuccessfully craning his head above and between the seats to get a glimpse of what all the hubbub was about, “What are you guys looking at!?”    
“Penelope’s gonna flip,” Emily mumbled to herself, a teasing smile playing on her face as she looked down at the picture Rossi sent her. Without a second thought, she saved the photo onto her phone. They’re never gonna live this down.     
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A/N: i hope you liked this!! i had a fun time writing it ehehe hotch is such a dilf, like an ACTUAL dilf im not even attracted to fathers but hotch?? all day, every day, baby!
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alexa-fika · 3 months
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hi! Do you mind writing something with a 3y/o child reader and the white beard pirates? Like specifically everyone is celebrating something, and then child reader slips and gets hurt and starts sobbing really loud and all the pirates are panicking?
Parties and Falls (Whitebeard pirates x male!reader)
A/N here we go! And along with this being a request I also wanted to dedicate it to @henrioo since I saw you were feeling down because of the lack of male readers out there and I wanted to cheer you up, this is not one of my best works but im hoping I can make more pieces so that you and all the male readers out there can enjoy and feel included!
Reader here is replaced by Dokucha which means reader in japanese
Dividers by @/saradika
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With a Yonko as a captain and one such as infamous as Whitebeard, one who was able to fight on equal ground with the Pirate King Himself, people usually thought of the Whitebeard pirates as a fearsome foe, and although it was true that you would not want them as foe, behind all that lied a close knitted family who all enyoyed one thing, partirs
With a whole bunch of pirates who could drink whole barrels of alcohol, they are the kind of crew that would throw whole week-long parties with everyone involved, and that was the case right now
Dokucha was not the exception. He always had a grand time when all his brothers were brought together on such a happy occasion
He wiggled his way around his brothers to reach the bar where Ace was currently sitting, struggling slightly to climb the top of the stool.
“Ace-nii, can I drink some of that too?” The boy asked, pointing to one of the pints the flame user was currently downing
“Sorry, lighting bug, you can’t have this.”
He pouts, leaning his head on the counter
“But everyone is having it!”
He chuckles
“Sorry, Dokucha, tell you what, how about you ask Thatch to prepare you something? I'm sure he can whip up something delicious for you.”
The boy lights up at that
“Really?!” He beams, the grin on his face quickly returning
“Yes, really, and make sure to thank him. He should be on the kitchen.”
“Okay!” He exclaimed, excited at the promise of a beverage; however, it was in his excitement that he forgot he was on top of a stool; losing his balance, he fell to the ground, the sound of the chair hitting the wood below being drowned by the cries of the child, the crew quickly sobering up at the sound
The entire crew looked down at the small child who was now crying on the ground; some were already rushing to get to him
Izou was the first to reach the small boy, picking him up and giving him a hug, trying to calm him down
He wraps his hands around his brother, their cries still ringing around the Moby Dick
“H-Hey Dokucha, hey, hey, don’t cry, lighting bug, it’s okay. We’re going to take care of you,” Ace reassures him, gently patting the head of the boy
“It hurts!” He cries
“Where does it hurt?” Ace asks as Marco makes his way over to the two
Thatch follows behind, rushing over
He simply points to his hands, small scratches littering them from their fall to the floor
Marco sighs, igniting his flames and holding Dokucha’s hands, healing all the small scratches. However, this did not lessen the cries of the small boy as tears rolled down his cheeks, hiccups escaping him.
“Buttercup, you’re okay. Look, see, your hands are all better now,” Vista says, joining his brothers in trying to calm down their youngest frowning when he shook his head and dug his head deeper into Izou’s shoulder as he continued crying and screaming
Whitebeard, who so far had been watching the whole ordeal play out, stepped in, gesturing at Izou to hand him over, who obliged
Whitebeard smiled gently at the crying boy in his hand
“There, There was that scary?”
He nods
“Y-yeah, and it hurt.”
“Well, you are alright now; look at you; there isn’t a scratch on you now.”
He cries, looking at his hands, and just as he had told him, there were no marks on his hands
“Breath in and out for me, yes, just like that, see you are okay.”
He sniffles, rubbing his eyes dry
“It was really scary.”
“It was scary, huh?” he says with a soft smile
“You feel better now?”
He nods smiling
“Thank you, PaPaw”
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Again it’s not my best works but I really hope you enyoyed and @henrioo I really hope this was able to cheer you up a little, and I will try to write more male!reader from now on!
Taglist:
@imaginarydreams
@amethystviolin
@h0n3y-l3m0n05
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chrolloluvr · 4 months
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Hello! Can I ask for general relationship headcannons with Mammon from helluva? I know he's toxic but I just love this bastard and his australian accent lol.
General Mammon SFW Relationship Hcs pt.1
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Note: YESS TYSM FOR REQUESTING THIS!! I love this dude idc what anybody thinks, also i might do a pt2 if this gets enough traction!! This is also a Female!reader, but if you squint it can be Genderneutral!reader
Warnings: Some cussing, use of pet names, some creepy behavior 💀
Starting off, Mammon would probably love to show you off. At his clown pageants, royal meetings, and basically anywhere important. If he's going somewhere, you will most likely be there, with his hand on one of your hips, or carrying you on his shoulder. However he won't let anybody get to know you, or even get their grubby hands near your precious body. Most of his fans speculate that if they see you somewhere, Mammon is always somewhere near you, or he at least has his servants follow you. I also imagine he also brings you to interviews.
He just loves to talk his head off about you. When it comes to his little lady, he just can't keep his mouth shut. I swear this man will be talking to Beelzebub or one of his business partners, and be like “Yeah that's nice and all dickhead, but Y/N is better at that by a long shot.” HE WILL BRING YOU UP AT THE MOST RANDOM TIMES! He will also twist his words in a way that involves you.
Loves and lives to buy you things. He feels obligated to get you luxurious items, even if you don't want them or feel bad. He knows he's one of, if not the most wealthy man in hell, so just let him spoil you, because he won't take no for an answer. If you don't like something he buys you, he won't be mad at you, but the people who made it. You're his pride and joy, so anything he buys you is very luxurious and one of a kind. When you go out to events with him, the press and 666 news will go crazy over the latest new necklace he bought you. If you just look up at him with those big doe eyes of yours, he will move heaven and hell for you.
He knows your weakness is his boisterous voice. He notices every detail about you, including the way your knees lock and your demeanor softens when he does that deep, Australian accent. He likes to grab your cheeks, and say in a low husky voice how you're so cute babe, my perfect little woman. Or when he calls you or leaves voicemails, he will talk innocently about something, but you never fail to take his voice and imagine it in, well, other ways.
I feel like Mammon would give you nicknames all the time. He rarely calls you buy your real name, unless hes upset, but he is never truly upset with you. He will call you babe most of the time, misses, my little lady, sweetheart, princess, my queen, woman, babycakes, and my little money maker (sometimes). He will call you these things, but also when he wants something from you like a warm hug, or to rub his shoulders, or to bring him his morning breakfast. He doesnt call you by your real name often, because he thinks its too serious, and in his eyes, you arent serious,you are just his little innocent woman, oblivious to the dangerous underworld.
There is an obvious power imbalance between the two of you. There's Mammon, a powerful deadly sin, the king of greed, and loved by billions of demons. And then there's you, a lowly demon/sinner who in his eyes, can barely do anything by yourself, hell, you need him to open a nutella jar for christ sake. He thinks of himself as your big strong protector, and also your king who you should bow down to, who you should be thankful for, because millions and millions of girls would die to be in your position.
When you two date, he want complete control over your life. Your social media, friends, people you talk to, family, etc. He most likely implanted a tracker somewhere on your body while you were sleeping. He controls all your socials, and most likely put “Account ran by the handsome king of greed” im your Sinstagram bio 😭. He also deleted any hate comments. One time somebody put “Miss girl is getting that little dick every night” And he got so butthurt, so he blocked them and personally killed them. He also wants you to stay innocent.
He loves to touch you. whether it be groping you, or slowly dragging his gloved fingers over your skin. He does not care about your size too, whether you are chubby or skinny, he loves you for you and that only applies to you. It does not matter how big or small your boobs are, he will guaranteed grab them atleast twice every day randomly. His favorite part of your body is most likely your belly and your boobs. But he loves everything about you, dont get me wrong.
He will never, and I mean never, let you down. He wants to see your pretty smile. If your going on a flight? First class. A show? Front row. You two are staying at a hotel? Presidential suite. He has you covered. Hes the sin of greed for crying out loud. He uses his status to get you the best of the best. If he sees you upset, he is upset at the people around him, and throws a big temper tantrum. In his eyes, he always needs to be the person to make you happy. If he ever sees you laughing at another mans corny jokes, he makes a mental note to personally handle them, and show them that he is your man, not some low class, vile excuse of a man.
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captainzigo · 3 months
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Welcome to me blog
My kofi is https://ko-fi.com/captainzigo if you enjoy my art, consider leaving me a tip! this is otherwise entirely a labor of love so
**i still dont take commissions currently, but if you send a request with a donation, there’s a 99% chance i’ll do it. and that remaining 1% i’ll probably just ask you for a different request.
If you are a mutual, DM me for an invite to discord server and subsequently to minecraft server
if you aren’t a mutual, you can send DMs and asks to my sideblog @snapewife-divorce-lawyer
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that’s a bunch of pictures of my oc(/ponysona) Prickly Pear. she’s a cowgirl
FAQ below the break
**if you send me a request with a donation you are not sending me a commision. you are making a donation, and i might do you a favor as a result. you do not own the resulting art. and I am under no obligation to complete it or to do it in the way that you like. you do not need to make a donation in order to make a request. You can send asks and DM‘s to @snapewife-divorce-lawyer 
i do take requests. i do not currently take commissions, but don’t be shy about sending requests. i can always say no. or fuck it up really bad.
this is my art blog. you can send me asks and DMs at my other blog @snapewife-divorce-lawyer any asks you send me should be like Strongbad emails. one paragraph. no attachments. unless you are sending me refs.
i reblog most stuff at my other other blog: @3amgaypotion
you are fine to DM me, but remember i am not obligated to respond at all.
in any interactions, please keep in mind that i am a stranger on the internet and act accordingly
i am autistic. i say this because representation matters, but also because i would like to ask that you please be very frank with me. i don’t even really need your patience. just say what you mean and we will get along fine.
you most certainly can draw any of my ocs. i’d love that acually. tag me
you can redraw, dub or do whatever to my works with credit. i expect credit to include clickable links. also please try to keep the spirit of the original work. don’t add nsfw subtext for example. don’t redraw a ship art as a ship with an inappropriate age gap, and so on.
do not post my art on other platforms. do not repost my art period. I don’t really exist on other platforms since I deleted Twitter. So if you see my stuff on other platforms, it’s not me. 
i’m in my twenties. i keep my blog SFW as a strict rule. PG13 except i swear a lot more. i do not keep myself that way, and i have no aversion to that sort of content, but i keep all of my posts SFW.
in my opinion, all romance real or fictional should be between people who are not related, similar in age, doing age appropriate things, all with mutual consent. i am not interested in witnessing or interacting with anything outside of these parameters.
i am a trans woman. i am also bisexual. i am also poly and demi since im listing things. i am out online becasue i know how important it is to know that you aren’t alone.
if you follow me and you post art, regardless of frequency or perceived quality, i want to be mutuals. shoot me a message or something
do i take constructive criticism? NO 🖕👹🖕 FUCK YOU!!!!!!! GET BLOCKED IDIOT!! unless you are a marginalized person who feels i have unintentionally made you uncomfortable somehow with my art or otherwise. in that case i am sorry and you do me a great favor by calling me out. OTHERWISE FUCK YOU DUMBASS IF YOU DONT LIKE MY ART GO DRAW YOUR OWN 🖕🖕🖕🖕
i don’t have a DNI list, but i am pretty left politically so you can probably imagine what’s on there.
“i hate bronies” i don’t necessarily hate you if you self identify with that label. i like to make myself off-putting to keep creeps away. i talk about it more in this post
i don’t hold a lot of nostalgia for old brony stuff. infact it’s quite the opposite
i like all generations of mlp including the new stuff. gen 4 is just the one i grew up with
why is my header aurora, bori and alice from the best gift ever? well that would be because i hate them like a mother hates a child. like the sun hates the moon. like sickly victorian child hates the slightest morsel of bread.
i often draw stuff about cozy glow x flurry heart. this is with the understanding that cozy glow spends about a decade turned to stone. nullifying the age gap.
i am dyslexic. i spell stuff wrong all the time and i type weird. please don’t bother correcting me. wooptydoo your brain is wired normally. sending you a medal.
i’ve had the same username since i debuted on the internet. zigo is the name of an oc i made that i dont really talk about anymore. zigo is a fine enough nickname and at least one person calls me that irl
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okay. im going to post again and break my own promise because i also want to address another side of the argument.
people saying how they can’t watch part 2 now because luke manipulated the fans and they feel that the magic is ruined.
remember. we are talking about real people here. they are not the fictional characters they play on screen. let’s go over this one by one, i LOVE making numbered lists for arguments:
1. Luke and Nicola provided us with a fabulous tour. They owe us NOTHING.
It’s US who should be greatfull to them for doing hard work. A long press tour with that amount of promotion must have been absolutely exhausting no matter how much you love your job.
2. Luke isn’t obliged to fall in love with Nic and date Nic.
3. Nic isn’t obliged to fall in love with Luke and date Luke.
4. MULTIPLE times they addressed the fact that they are good friends. People were giddy making gifs saying “no, ur lying”.
Now imagine someone coming up to you and saying “You’re in love with me”. You answer “No i’m not”. They tell you “Nah, you’re lying”. It’s all in good fun until it grows into a straight up disrespectful delusion.
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5. The personal life of actors shouldn’t affect how you feel about fictional characters. ESPECIALLY if they did not a fucking thing wrong. I wish really creepy and predotary people in the industry got at least half of the shit Luke is going through right now because Luke dared to have a fucking relationship. Or a relationship not with Nic.
6. We should be thankful to Nic and Luke for being kind, professional and respectful. We should be in love with their beautiful friendship, and not push either of them to cater to desires of fans who cannot, will not, do not want to distinguish between show and real fucking life. They have no obligation to you to start dating because their onscreen counterparts did and you liked it.
7. Again, I do not want to speculate. I have no idea if it was their decision or if it was PR. If they were encouraged to hide their relationship during promotion (imagine waiting this fucking long), or if they were encouraged to show that they’re together right after the show dropped. I do not know AND IT DOES NOT MATTER. Even the idea of restraining your personal life due to PR is sad and makes me sick. I hope they’re just going with the flow, staying true to themselves and are being HAPPY.
“Was it a wrong PR decision?” does not fucking matter because it should be their fucking decision to begin with. The fact that PR is created for this exact reason - to do damage control when people lose their shit over something normal is bind-boggling. It is insane that we came to this fucking point in human history.
8. The phrase “Luke’s hard launch” disgusts me. Fans are talking about Antonia like she’s an object and not a real person. JUST STOP!
9. Try to be fucking kind and touch the fucking grass once in a while. Grass is lovely - take Penelope’s advice.
Seeing this makes me think that the comments are coming from two groups of people:
1. Toxic stan’s who want Nic with Luke and can’t grasp the idea that they are not their characters. “Luke is a lot like Colin” from interviews does not fucking equal “Luke is in love with Nic”. Following this delulu logic he should have fallen for Claudia then because they said multiple times that Claudia is a lot like Pen and Nic is a lot like Eloise. There is no fucking connection in these statements. Fucking none.
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2. People who loved the idea of Luke being single because it allows them to fantasize about Luke falling in love with them. It’s okay, we’ve all had celebrity crushes, but when it gets to the point of you throwing hate at the person, it becomes creepy and unhealthy.
To all the haters and “sympathizers” - get some help and get your shit together.
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angelstate · 1 year
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(Don't) Say You're Sorry, Please.
Pairing: Peter Parker x fem! reader
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending!
Warnings: harsh argument, cursing, mention of alcohol and reader getting drunk, explicit emotions, symptoms of mental illness.
Summary: you and peter were no longer happy, it took a big fight, harsh words and some time apart to realize how much love you felt for one another.
Words: 3k!
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you didn't know how it got to this point, when the calmness of a silly discussion turned into a heated argument and a silent competition of who could scream harder horrible things to the other.
It got to the point where you had been crying for so long it was hard to breath and your eyes sting every time you blinked, it felt as if your stuck in the middle of a panic attack and couldn't get out of it no matter what you tried to do.
You didn't even remember when everything went wrong and you ended up here, it was like all your memories had been swept away and now there was a recognizable emptiness that the both of you shared.
you knew everything but could remember nothing.
you didn't had what it took to fight like this with Peter. You didn't have the voice, the feelings or the calculated thoughts to defend yourself.
You threw weak attempts of calming the situation but nothing worked so you let the venom that was boiling in your chest spill over and make you say things you would regret.
The love was long forgotten.
"just shut the fuck up, peter! for once in your fucking life shut the fuck up. You aren't the voice of truth all the fucking time, sometimes you are in the wrong, get over it for fucks sake!" You screamed at him and pulled your hair in an attempt to let out some of the anger you felt.
"i should shut up?! You're the one who acts like a fucking bitch all the goddamn time. You are fucking insufferable, i swear to god sometimes i can't fucking understand why i even put up with your shit!" peter screamed back at you, he was pointing at you the entire time. blaming you for this.
"you put up with my shit?! I'm the one who has a fucking super hero for a boyfriend. If anyone is putting up with shit is fucking me!! You always get hurt and put yourself in danger. you run to saves stranger from small fucking crimes, but who takes care of me?! You love playing hero but always end up getting hurt, What is going to take for you to realize that you are not prepared to save anyone!!" You screamed as loud as you could everything that came to your mind.
You were so done with this shit, with the argument, with the super hero bullshit. It was draining, being there to help peter get healthy every time he got hurt stopped being out of love but obligation.
While he took care of the city you were left to take care of him, but who was making the time to take care of you? Nobody. Nobody was taking care of you.
"i'm not prepared?! I have saved the world more than once! I've gone through hell trying to keep everyone save!! Im more than capable of saving people from small shitty crimes!" peter said trough gritted teeth.
"then why, tell why the fuck you can never help me?! Why you can never save me?! Am i not worth your stupid help!!?" you felt tears starting to leave your eyes harder than ever.
You knew that there was no way you could ever recover from this fight and be like you were before; this was a breaking point that was long time coming in the relationship.
"i don't help you?! every second that I'm not being spiderman im by your side fucking teaching you to not fuck up like you always do!" Peter screamed and raised his hand, closed his fist before letting his arm fall back down.
"you are so full of shit" this time you didn't shouted, your voice was trembling and soft, your throat wasn't prepared for any more screaming.
"you are so full of shit, Parker. we are never together, if you're not being spiderman you're busy doing shit to get better at being a super hero. You are never here for me. Im sorry that when i see you after a long time i want to tell you how my life has been. Im so fucking sorry i want you to be here for me." Your eyes filled with tears again your vision was blurry because of it but you didn't let any more tears fall. This wasn't worth the pain.
"im full of shit for being a super hero? Im so sorry if I'm not here because im saving people's life. I have so much shit going on that the last thing i wanna hear is more problems you want me to fix. I am so fucking sorry i can't fix your fucking life, you won't believe how much bigger problems i have to deal with outside of this fucking room" peter spoke his voice was stern.
In that moment, you realized something. You weren't his first priority. You weren't even on the list of things he worried about.
Why were you still here with him? Why haven't you walked away from a place you clearly weren't wanted in?
You loved peter so much to the point you forgot that he should love you too to be together.
"i think we need a break from each other" you whispered and rubbed your eyes to get rid of the tears.
Silence.
Peter didn't said nothing, just stood in the middle of your room looking completely lost. his eyes for the first time tonight filled with tears and his lower lip quivered in what you could only describe as pure sorrow.
"you don't mean that" peter said and tried to get close to you but you took a step back and embraced yourself.
"it's for the best, peter." you reassured him. it was really for the best. This time it had gotten too far to not notice the two of you needed space.
"no no no, I'm sorry, ok? Im really sorry. Please don't break up with me" peter pleaded.
"don't say you're sorry, please. we just need some time alone." you hugged peter one last time.
"we'll fix this, right?" Peter whispered in your ear and tighten his hold on you. It was so hard to let go.
you couldn't respond, no didn't knew if this could be fixed.
peter just took in your silence and kissed you for the last time, just way to promise to not let the relationship die tonight.
___________
Three weeks had passed since the fight.
thinking back to that night felt like a dream, you could feel the guilt of everything you said weight heavier and heavier every day.
You regretted everything you said, every word you let out that night. you may have ruined one of the only good things in your life out of pure selfishness.
peter and you rarely talked, there was nothing to say, no. There was too much to say and that scared the both of you. what if one you had realized the relationship was going to be fixable?
The fear was ingrained in the both of your minds, both of you suffering because of the same fear.
"how is she?" Peter asked mj, who was concentrated eating her lunch.
"your ex girlfriend?" Mj said sarcastically and looked at peter with boredom.
"we didn't broke up" peter said quickly, the title of ex girlfriend made his heart clench in pain.
"she's sad and doesn't look good at all, Parker" she said honestly and looked at her food before continuing.
"if your dumbass checked on her you would know that" she said and took a bite of a mini carrot.
"we are taking some time apart" peter defend himself, it was true but that wasn't the reason he checked up on you. He was scared of seeing what the decision made to you.
He had shattered since that night, crying anytime he was left alone with his thoughts. He feared to see you in a worst condition than he was. Scared to see how his words bruised you.
"yeah? maybe try spend a life time apart because you don't want to see how you left her, Parker." Mj said in bitterness, you were her best friend and seeing you in pain because of him didn't sat right with her. She understood the situation but would always make the people that hurt you hurt too.
Peter just sat there, looking worried and sad.
You were feeling like shit, every inch of your mind was filled with sadness and your body reflected your state of mind so clearly it was embarrassing to go out looking like the human version of sadness.
right now, you were in one of the stalls of the girls bathroom, trying to eat your lunch but you had no appetite, you stopped feeling hungry two weeks ago.
You couldn't eat, so you took supplements like candy, trying to keep your body healthy but it didn't worked. You lost weight and looked pale.
But it didn't really mattered, nothing felt like it mattered. In your mind, you had no reason whatsoever to care about yourself or anything at all.
_____________
It was Friday night and you were drunk as fuck. not in a party, just in the solitude of your living room, lit cigarette in hand and a tall glass filled all the way with pure vodka.
the tv was on, the movie 'The perks of being a Wallflower' playing but the sound acting as a background noise because all your attention was on your phone, waiting for a message from him to pop up.
How much you wished you had the courage to message him first.
You took a big sip from the glass and felt the familiar warm spread in your chest, your empty stomach had been suffering all day and now was experiment the harshest treatment you had ever put it through.
Not even in your high school years you were careless enough to not eat anything before drinking strong alcohol.
"say you're sorry, please?" you whispered to yourself, trying to force yourself to call him, to admit your mistakes and beg for forgiveness.
You spend two hours staring at your phone, all the vodka in you glass had already disappeared and the entire bottle followed soon after; before you even realize it
"I'll say I'm sorry, please forgive me..." you whispered and pressed to call peter. you put the call on speaker and held your phone close to your mouth.
You had your knees to your chest and had wrapped a blanket around yourself, trying to stay calm and collected.
"hello?" Peter answered the call.
"hi...pete" you said, voice dripping evidence of your drunken state.
"how are you, y/n?" he asked and you heard how he sat on his bed from the way the springs made a uncomfortable sound.
"i'm.. I'm drunk" you admitted and laughed a little.
"I, I really wanted to talk to you, pete." you're voice broke, and your eyes glossed over with tears.
"I wanted to talk to you too, flower" the pet name made your heart clench.
"really?" you asked, your tone filled with the warm that the pet name created in your soul.
"yeah, i was thinking about you, i used my telepathic powers and you called" he joked and you giggled.
"thanks for using your powers, pete" you took a deep breath.
"i called because i want to tell you something" you said and heard how peter took a deep breath.
"tell me, flower. Im all ears" he spoke sweetly, so sweetly you felt your heart clench again.
"i just, i wanted to tell you that i'm sorry, i'm really sorry about everything i said when we were fighting." you took a pause and to stop the tears from falling.
"i don't 'up with you', i honestly don't even know why i said that. you are amazing to be around and i was wrong for saying differently. you're a great super hero and the fact that you put yourself in danger and get hurt just to save other people is admirable. You're more than prepared to be the biggest super hero the world has known" you let out a shaky breath, your eyes betrayed you and multiple tears fell from your eyes.
"and you're right, you do help me to not do stupid things. I just...i just feel like i'm not worth it enough of more attention than the one you give me to save me from my stupidity."
"and lastly, you're not full of shit. That's me, not you. I know you have bigger problems than giving me attention just because i feel like im entitled to your time. I feel really guilty for everything i said. Forgive me, please?" You finished speaking.
Peter was speechless, and his heart already broken heart, ended breaking completely when you bed for his forgiveness.
You beg him for forgiveness? how could you feel sorry for saying the things he needed to hear to wake up and realize he wasn't a good boyfriend? You opened his eyes when you spoke up about how abandoned you felt because of him never being there for you.
If anyone should apologize was him.
"flower..." Peter sighed.
"yes?" You responded, voice shaky and anxious.
"I'm sorry for everything i said too. I shouldn't have called you a bitch. You're not insufferable, your the sweetest and loveliest person i have ever met. i'm grateful that i have you in my life."
"and you're right about me never being there to give you anything other than help, i love you and i thought that just because you knew that i didn't have to remind you every day. you have all the right to tell me how you feel or what you're going through and i should always be there to hear you. I know that you don't want me to fix your life or your problems. You only wanted to be heard but i didn't care to listen at the time."
"thanks for believing I'm a great super hero and I'm sorry that I've been saving people without thinking about how me getting hurt so much and running to you to heal me affected you. I've been selfish in our relationship just because i wanted to be selfless and save people. Forgive me, please"
Peter asked and you took a deep breath.
"if i forgive you will you forgive me too?" you asked back, you also wanted to be forgiven.
"of course, flower" peter answered and your heart skipped a beat.
"then, i forgive you, pete." you said and felt a smile forming on your face.
"i forgive you too, flower." Peter smiled too.
All the weight you have been carrying on your shoulders was lifted just like the light on your soul, you could finally live again. No more sorrow and pain.
"I'll see you tomorrow, right?" You asked with hope.
"yeah, we'll see each other tomorrow" peter made the plan of showing up at your apartment tomorrow, make everything right and give you all the affection and time you deserved.
______________
(a few months later)
you were sleeping peacefully in your bed, wrapped up in blankets and softly breathing. It was spring break and you have spent all day cleaning so you were having your well deserved rest.
that was until you starting hearing something hitting your window, being a light sleeper you woke up almost immediately, you checked the time on you phone '01:23am'
Still being half asleep you didn't even thought about what who hitting against your window because it was obvious, you stood up, walked over to the window, opened it and turned around to lie down again in your bed.
"hi baby" you said when you were back in your bed, this time your back against the wall to give peter space to lay down with you.
"hi flower" peter pressed the spider in the middle of his suit making loose and fall of his body.
He picked up the hoodie that was on your desk and put it on before laying down beside you, almost instantly he hugged you and you wrapped one of your legs around his waist to bring him closer to you while one of your arms wrapped around his next. Your free hand started caressing his hair sofly.
"how was night patrol?" you asked, your eyelids already closing in tiredness.
"it was calm, i just helped a few drunk guys get home" peter said and rubbing your back, drawing random shapes with his fingers.
"that's good" you whispered.
"go to sleep, flower." peter whispered against your ear and tighten his hold on your waist making you be totally pressed against him, your face in the crook of his neck.
"goodnight spidey" was the last thing you said before falling asleep.
"goodnight flower, i love you" peter kissed the top of your head before falling asleep too.
The both of you finally being the happy couple you deserved to be. The love you felt for each other was no longer forgotten in the pain of misunderstood emotions, now it was more alive than ever, burning and keeping you warm and safe from all the sorrow you had to go through to be happy with peter again.
Everything was fixed and was better than the first time you started to love each other.
There was no longer pain, just peace and the comfortable bed of love the both of you slept in for the rest of your life.
How beautiful it was to love Peter, forever save in his arms.
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crippled-peeper · 2 months
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do you think people with “less severe” physical disabilities should clarify that on their cpunk blogs/not call themselvescpunk ? i say this because i am “less severe” than most ppl i see here, i use mobility aides but i am primarily ambulatory and most doctors look at me and say its not that bad bcz my conditions are all supposedly easily treatable despite none of the treatments working. im scared if i start a cpunk blog people are going to say im not disabled enough or im imposing myself into a space i dont belong in. i know the original coining says people of all physical disabilities can be cpunk, but i just dont know if the actual culture really believes that.
if this is way too much to ask of one person, really sorry! youre under no obligation to answer, i just dont really know how else to ask this question since im scared of creating a blog in the first place and ur a cpunk blogger that seems like you probably wouldn’t yell at me for asking :,)
It doesn’t really matter what other people behave like or say to you. Cpunk was always supposed to include people who are “less severely” or less “visibly” disabled. The only requirement there has ever been is that you consider yourself physically disabled.
Tai, the creator of cpunk, had fibromyalgia themselves and made many posts about it and about how it impacted their life. I think they would be displeased if they saw people going around saying “actually, you’re not bad enough off, you can’t talk about being physically disabled!” Because they themselves might have fallen into that category in the distant past.
I’m not the arbiter of who can talk in/use the Cripplepunk tag. I only go off what the person who created it said about it on their blog.
Unfortunately, we can’t ask them anymore since they are no longer with us, but I’m almost certain they would want you to blog about your experiences even if they don’t seem “that bad”, because a lot of people (even me sometimes) feel like they can never have it “bad enough” to feel valid.
this kind of concern is actually super common with people who are gaslit about their conditions
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jewishvitya · 7 months
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I just wanted to thank you so much for all of your insight and generosity with your perspective as an anti-zionist israeli, something you absolutely don't owe us but I feel immense amounts of respect and admiration for. from an American jew, it's been so valuable to know there are people like you out there, it's made everything feel much less hopeless despite all the hopelessness. I've felt very alone recently, surrounded by all the Jewish people in my life who are pro-israel and don't seem to grasp the gravity of the situation and my pro-palestine gentile friends, and I've felt very alone in my grief as I've only really started to unpack and dismantle my own biases very recently. reading your posts and your perspective on everything has just made me feel very seen as a jew in this situation, especially as I try to reconcile my feelings about everything going on with my own feelings about my faith and my identity.
you've probably seen that I've gone through a lot of your posts and that I've followed you. i just want you to know that I'm not necessarily following you just for that, I know you're just a fandom blog, it's just that after looking through your posts I feel like you're just a really nice person and seeing yoi on my dash from you would be endearing coming from you even though im not into it myself.
just. thank you again for sharing your story and continuing to share. you have no idea how much it's helped me.
I'm in tears. I've been crying way more than usual over the past couple of months, but it's nice for a change to have those tears to come from being touched instead of grief. I apologize if I'm going to ramble.
You say I didn't owe you all this, but I do feel responsible. I'm watching so much destruction and seeing how comfortable people around me are with the loss of life. This is why I've been talking about what we do and not as much about the impact of October 7 on me or people I know. I did a bit of that in the beginning, but pretending it was the start of everything to keep going back to that one day, after two months of horror, as if I can't count past 7... I didn't choose to be born where I am, I didn't choose to grow up in the most extremist community this place has to offer. But since I'm here, since I'm comfortable at the expense of Palestinians and violence is being done in my name and I have the tools to highlight issues within my society, I think it's a moral obligation.
I know how I talk about things here, and that's genuinely because I don't want to minimize the severity of the racism and the nationalism in Israel. And someone perceived my words as showing hatred for Israelis. But... I love my people. I don't expect those who see or experience our violence to feel the same or even understand me, but I do. It's my neighbors and my childhood friends and my family. It's children I see playing outside and getting excited when they see I have a cat, and the random people who stop me in the street and give me directions if they think I look lost.
Even growing up in the West Bank settlements, the people were very good to me. I needed years to internalize the fact that this kindness doesn't get extended to you if you're not part of the in-group. It broke my heart. It still does. Seeing people who I know are capable of kindness and compassion, hardening themselves against the pain of other human beings. Closing their eyes and telling themselves it isn't real. It's all an act.
I told a friend I feel like I'm betraying my mom, who was deeply bigoted, but also a wonderful mother. She taught me a lot of the principles that are guiding me now - I just took down the walls she put around who deserves to be considered. She'd be horrified with seeing the things I'm saying if she was still alive. But she taught me to care about people, I just decided it means all people.
Everyone should be prioritizing Palestinian liberation, and at the same time, I care about this too. I care about the morality of my people. I need us to be better than this. I want to dismantle the nationalism that teaches us hate and violence so we can start to heal and come to terms with what we did (and still do) here. I want us to fix what we can and hold ourselves accountable. I want us to reimagine safety in a way that doesn't cause harm, and build good relationships with the rest of humanity. Every marginalized community is experiencing bigotry in interactions with every other community, that's just how these things work. But I believe healing the world, and healing my society, is possible.
And it's hard, because so much of what we learn is rooted in truth. Antisemitism is real. Millennia of persecution are real. The trauma we carry is real. If the idea of an ethnostate makes us feel safe, and the idea of losing it makes us scared, how do we differentiate between fear as a natural reaction to antisemitic violence and fear that was taught to us for the sake of nationalism? Especially those of us living in Israel, immersed in the propaganda. It doesn't matter in practice, our feelings of safety or fear don't justify an ethnostate, especially not one built on top of another nation, but it matters for the conversations I have with people.
And I said that the violence I'm seeing feels like an attack on my identity. Seeing a giant hannukiyah in Gaza, when Hannukah tells the story of occupied people fighting off their oppressors. Seeing images that echo so much of the horrors that were done to us. The Magen David being used with hate and spite. It's all so painful. And I love this land, it's the only home I've known, so seeing us destroying nature and soaking it with blood and calling that connection?
Judaism does guide me here. The concept of tikkun olam. The idea of לא עליך המלאכה לגמור ולא אתה בין חורין לבטל ממנה - doing what I can, even if what I'm able to do isn't some decisive blow that entirely turns the tide. The idea that every human being is a whole entire world, to me it means that every single person alive is worth fighting for. So no matter how much death I see, there's still worlds more to save.
And Jewitches had this post that felt just healing to read. Nationalism hijacked our culture, and it will always leave a mark for centuries into the future. But I'm not letting go, and I'm not letting that create a rift between me and thousands of years full of history I can be proud of.
I feel your grief. And I'm grateful for the anti-zionist Jews I met by talking about this, because honestly, I need you people in my life. The pain and the anger are both easier to hold together.
So, thank you for following. I might follow back, just to see you around on my feed. And thank you for sending this. Feel free to message me anytime for any reason (I promise it won't result in a lecture every time).
Also, your url gave me pjo nostalgia
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pooplyface1423 · 4 months
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~Hidden Love~
YandareHuman Al x Reader
Warnings: none i think
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⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧
"Y/n i want you to meet Alastor hes going to be the newest Radio host aka hes going to take up Daniel's part so that means you'll be Al's new Assistant okay"
"Okay!"
"Well as you heard i'm alastor pleasure meeting you!" Said Al leaning down to kiss your hand
"Well thanks i'm Y/n"
After that you felt something different never knowing what it was..................... Al was always nice to you unlike to anybody else. But why?
⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧
The party was a success Daniel was happier than ever You got to dance with Al you (in your opinion is kinda cute). Afterwards you and everybody else was heading home. You were a good 20 minutes away from ur house. A very long way home ugh....
"You know a pretty lady shouldn't be walking home this late all alone right?you never know what can happen" Says Al walking up to you
"Oh hi Alastor yea i know but I'll be fine I've done this many time and i'm alive" you say being slightly sarcastic at the end
"Oh dear you never know what could happen and so I shall insist taking you home"
"Oh you don't need to i ca- "I insist dear imagen the guilt i would feel if something happens to you when you leave"
"Well fine if you insist"
"Wonderful!"
You both went on your way home everything was going well Al wanted to "chat" so he knows more about his new assistant's schedule and so on but they both knew he just wanted to know more about Her.
Until it started to rain you both quickly ran Alastor handing you his jacket so you don't get as wet as him.(wow such a gentlemen)
You both ran quicker once you told him you saw ur house come up.
Once at ur door step you let Al in mostly cuz hes soaking wet.
"Get in" "No need dear im going to head home thankfully its not far"
After Al says that a strong lightning strikes.
"Oh Well now you are getting in"
You quickly indicate where the shower in a guest room would be and say ur going to hand him some clothes.
After some digging in ur closet deep down you found a flimsy but formal shirt which looks slightly to big but who cares you find everything else and go into the guest room and knock on the bathroom door say the clothes are in the bed.
After a good 10 minutes Al comes out looking funny since the shirt fits him big
"why do you have a shirt this big?"
"Well it was my fathers"
"Oh well its an honor to wear the shirt of a proud father"
"haha yea thanks"
"Well i made some soup so you don't get sick come so you can eat it"
"No need dear I'll be fine"
you looked at him with a stern face and tell him to come and eat before it gets cold.
He obliged and sat down with you to eat and not get sick (ha lol)
When he took a bite he felt like he could marry you right then and there it tasted very similar to his mothers so good and full with love.
After the both of you finished you talked some more while you quickly washed the dishes.
"Well i should head out dear"
"No need its still raining and i have a spare bedroom u can use"
"Are you sure dear?"
"Yes i'm sure why else would i offer it?"
Then you both went to bed.
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After that your bond was very nice both of you had feeling for each other but didn't say for some reasons.
First Al didn't want you to find out he was a f'n serial killer.(what would you think of him?)
And you were just scared of what people would say to you like why date a radio host you can definitely score a hot rich man with all ur beauty.
But either way both of you were satisfied with being just friend/coworkers for now.
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Until you had suspicions he was the killer. you didn't have much proof but you confronted him
"hey Al? can i talk to you bout something"
"Sure thing! what is it?"
"Um well just wanted to know are you the killer that has been going around killing the innocent?
"Oh no dear no i'm not why would i be"
"oh well there was some staff saying it might be you"
"oh well who was it?"
"well a lot of the male staff was saying it like mike don and Sam"
"Well you don't need to worry ur little head about it I think i can handle it with them"
"Oh okay, then i'm going to head out for the day bye Al"
"Bye Y/n see you"
⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧⬧"
Hello finally finished part 1. Part 2 will hope fully come out Wednesday.
Hope ya'll liked it.
~Hidden Love~
Tag-list
@rl800
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carpedzem · 3 months
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hi
under the cut i want to talk a little bit, maybe overshare as well. ill try to keep it short (rereading nat here. i didnt). its a sad post, might make some of you angry but not for the reasons you think
i was staying away on purpose, but a few people asked about me so i wanted to let you know that hey, im lurking, im waiting to see what happens. maybe some things will change in the future but im putting it out here so its all in one place
i think i want to start with saying thank you again for sticking around, supporting my art and my thoughts and having discussions with me. i really opened up about myself and what I created here. im very anxious person and it influences my life on every level, so being heard, seeing people laughing at my jokes, loving my art has been so so important to me
about the situation, the gogcident if you will, i logged out as soon as i saw things going down and been getting updates though different source. and while situation is still on going and i dont know where it will go, as how it ends, theres two or three things im firm on that will always be true for me:
i really hate how believe all victims turns into believe everyone who speaks first, no matter what they say, no matter context, no matter proof. the first statement made in this case was untrue in a lot of important details and while i dont think caitis feeling are wrong or invalid i think her first statement made this situation into something it isnt. i think every victim should be heard but attacking everyone who was accused right away is not a solution
i do believe that everyone who was accused of anything has every right to defend themselves. the way its constantly taken away from dteam is not lost on me and its insane and upsetting
you can be traumatized by the events that werent in its core meant to be traumatizing. sometimes people act shitty and leave scars on you and sometimes you can do the same to other people
edited note bc i want this to be here as well: guilty until proven innocent is a crazy mindset and i cannot imagine situation that i would allow it. some idiots dont even realise how dangerous rhetoric that is. including accusers not being obligated to provide any proof of their claims
twt is the worst thing to deal with any discourse, misunderstanding or any delicate situation. i think no ones there cares for any victims period. i wish that place the worst
okay so what now. i havent decided yet. georges and dreams moves so far confirmed for me that no matter what happened it wasnt with malicious intentions. ill wait to see how this plays out and then ill decide about my next steps. one think i did for sure is i uninstalled twt from my phone (and that already bit my ass the moment dream started his space…) that part of fandom, both people who like (liked?) and hate dream is so damn self-destructive, toxic, manipulative and performative it wasnt worth it anymore. for here, i dont know yet. i dont hate dteam, i think this is very unfortunate and sad and complicated situation that left people very deeply hurt. and i wish it wasnt this way and im pretty sure dteam also wish that. but they cant change it and i cant change it even more
now this is something i dont really know how to tell you but let me try. i never mentioned this bc when i had those realizations, it was too late, everyone moved on and i felt stupid for dwelling on this. i feel stupid now, typing this. the thing is, drituation left me quite traumatized. fucking pathetic, i know. the sudden explosion of fandom left me really badly hurt. i lost a lot of people i genuinely believed to be friends with, and i miss them dearly. i felt, fuck it, still feel deeply betrayed by some of them. i dont want people guess who is who thats not the point, those people moved on long time ago. but that hurt has been really difficult to deal with, especially since realistically i know its quite stupid. crying over some people who were following me back for a few months? but i tried to let myself heal and grow love for this community again and i thought we will be okay. drituation felt like the end of the world but we got through it and I thought we are smarter. and well. im not trying to blame anyone or even a whole community, idk maybe i want to blame the universe for putting me here or society for working this way i dont know. but im hurting and i need to find a better way to deal with things going the wrong way. and it deeply upsets me but im afraid that i have to learn how to love you all less. and i honestly dont know yet what that means, how moving forward will look like. i dont have to make this decision now so i let myself stay away from social media for a while still and then go with presented situation the best i can. i dont try to make anyone responsible for my wellbeing i want to make this clear. im just trying to share my feelings and give you context for whatever happen in the nearest future. no matter what i need more healthy relationship not even with ccs but with community itself (and if you see me rebloging hazbin hotel fanarts. spare me...)
in this place i do want to state that no matter what i dont think dteam are bad people. im not closing myself at possibility of participating in the fandom, probably less though things i mentioned earlier. but if any of those things make you uncomfortable in any way, feel free to unfollow/softblock
im leaving my askbox open if anyone has anything to say, add, or idk, scream at me. not sure if i answer any tho. also if i delete this post in the next 10 minutes out of embarrassment then well, haha
on the final note i want once again thank you all for supporting me when i needed help for my cat. you all did something amazing, something i will never forget and i wish to hug everyone of you in person. thank you
see you around. one day. maybe tomorrow maybe in 10 days. idk
and if you are moving on in different direction, if we ever meet again, dont be a stranger
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vanderlesbian · 11 months
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rdr2 x autistic reader headcanons
saw someone else do this but i wanted to give my headcanons too! enjoy tehe... includes arthur, john, dutch, and charles!
gn!reader + no warnings / fluff
arthur morgan
arthur is so patient and understanding with you
from the moment you met him, you never felt the need to mask around him because he never questioned your behaviors or belittled you for them
if any problems ever arised, arthur would always be quick to come to your defense
hes very careful with you; he handles you like he's holding a butterly. not because he thinks youre fragile or incapable, but because he cares for you too much and never wants to hurt you
he also knows that youre sensitive to things and will take mental notes
if he sees that you cover your ears when something loud happens, he'll be sure to be quiet around you
if you express that you don't like how a certain food feels, he'll start bringing other options along to make sure you're eating
he's not very good at being upfront with his emotions, and you can't always catch onto his hints which ends up with you being confused
but he's trying to break that habit
all in all he's a very understanding partner who prioritizes you above all
john marston
lets be real john is also autistic
youre both very understanding of each others needs and its nice to be able to completely be yourself around your partner
in a relationship he can be very touchy sometimes, but he can recognize when you dont want to be touched. if hes unsure, he'll ask
he will wait or ask for permission to do pretty much anything
"can i kiss you?" "can i hug you?" "is it alright if we hold hands?"
hes definitely awkward but he just needs the confirmation
he is veryyy blunt but to you its a good thing
it makes me feel like neither of you have to worry about if the other is beating around the bush or something because both of you say whats on your mind LOL
both of you are trying to figure out this relationship thing together
from an outside perspective, people might think the two of you are moving really slow, but for both of you its a perfect pace
dutch van der linde
dutch is your biggest fan when you start infodumping
he will listen to you speak about whatever for days on end, and you'll do the same with him as he talks about whatever philosophical tangent he has for the day
hes so infatuated with you its crazy
you will finish your infodumping tangent and he will scoop you up in his arms and go,"you're so beautiful/handsome, you know that?"
like oookaaayyy huhehehehehhehhshsh
he will SPOIL you with things related to your special interest. anything he sees that he knows you'll like, he'll snatch it up so quick to give it to you
he'll definitely boast about you to the other members
"they're so INTELLIGENT and HARD WORKING...perhaps the rest of you should take a note or two"
he lets you fidget with his fingers because you like his rings
he makes sure that your shared tent is perfectly up to your standards
the feeling of the blanket overwhelms you? suddenly hes sending arthur out to fetch a new one
he definitely pampers you a lot and sometimes it might feel suffocating at times but not bc you dislike it, you just need a moment to recharge
you'll tell him you need a moment to yourself and he'll oblige
charles smith
the two of you love parallel play omg
you two will be completely silent while he makes arrows and you partake in one of your hobbies but its so comforting to both of you
charles will always be the first to notice when you start to get overstimulated, so he'll tell the others to quiet down, give you space, or whatever else you need to calm yourself
hes kind of overprotective of you, so sometimes you'll have to reassure him that youre fine
he just cares about you more than anything
now that im thinking about it charles is also probably autistic
he's usually very quiet but with you he'll never shut up because he knows that you'll listen and show genuine interest
he will craft things for you to fidget with omfg
he'll notice that youre very antsy with your hands or legs and one day you'll come back to your tent and see a small handmade doll sitting on your bed
"did you make this for me?"
"i noticed you play with your fingers a lot"
he's genuinely the sweetest ever and he will just have heart eyes for you all the time
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butchbenrey · 1 month
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listen to me. ive already talked about how ptsd haver gordie would struggle to be around the science team, but think about darnold. okay?
(this turned out longer than i thought it would so im sparing you the experience of scrolling past it. true darnold pepper heads will read on. i know this to be true)
think about her. she was like, one of the only people who ever really Helped rather than hindered gordie during canon, and she did it completely of her own goodwill. the bit of time where everyone met darnold was a distinct respite from the chaos of the rest of black mesa. at least, it was as calm as it could get with the whole crew there fucking around. and darnold, while eccentric and silly, is undeniably the most emotionally intelligent person gordie met that whole time. and she had some self-preservation instinct, causing her to stay behind, which i would say makes darnold way better for gordie to be around than any of the other characters. because darnold knows and understands to some extent what happened, she was there after all, but she's not so intimately connected to the events that it would make gordie uncomfortable.
i think darnolds narrative function as a respite in canon could carry over to post-canon stuff too... i think darnold is someone gordie could confide in and actually get some reasonable responses from. i know a lot of people put tommy in the role of like. designated gordie therapist post-canon but i really can't see that. tommy just does not share the same outwardly friendly and curious demeanor that darnold does, at least not to me. and i can't imagine him really giving a shit about anything gordie says 😭. sorry. but darnold is different to me! i can imagine a frazzled and traumatized gordie going through old work emails trying to find a way to contact darnold again, looking for closure she'll never get. i can imagine her contacting darnold, anxious out of her mind, but finding that, when they do eventually meet up for coffee and darnold does some wacky shit to her own drink for funsies, she can roll with this. this is nice, to her. i think she can be a lesbo about it to be quite honest with you.
i have this scene in my head of like. somebody— probably coomer— throwing some kind of party and of course gordie feels obligated to come despite knowing in her heart its a terrible idea. and of course, she ends up spending much of the party standing awkwardly in a corner trying not to freak the fuck out and jumping out of her skin when coomer gives her a friendly (hard as fuck) punch on the arm. darnold has been spending the whole party rummaging around the bar and making all kinds of beautiful and fucked up cocktails, and when she notices gordie shes like "dear god that poor thing." so she makes a special little drink just for her, approaches gordie, and offers it to her, saying: "you seem a little glum. this should cheer you up!" and gordie breaks down sobbing on the floor because its so nice and shes so overwhelmed and nobody has shown her that kind of kindness and generosity in so long.
darnold also internally freaks out a little bit, scared she fucked something up, but she reasons that regardless of why gordie's crying, it's probably a good idea to take her outside and away from all the lights and sounds. so she does; she helps gordie up, escorts her out to the porch, sits her down. and they talk. gordie apologizes profusely for ruining the party and being weird and whatever and darnold earnestly replies that she was only there for the drinks anyways, she doesn't quite care for parties in the first place. gordie chugs the cute lil drink darnold gave her, and its good, and she tells darnold as much. darnold is very thankful that its so dark out because she is so so so flustered and she hopes gordie can't tell. gordie leans on her, though darnold is well over a foot shorter than gordie, so really it's functionally gordie resting her head on top of darnold's.
gordie is very much a lightweight and she gets more drunk from that one little glass than someone whos like 6'2" should, so darnold offers to drive her home to her apartment. gordie agrees, and she's even more handsy with people when she's drunk, so she's all holding onto darnold for support and rubbing her thumbs into her shirt and getting distracted. it is not good for darnolds composure in the slightest but she is trying so very hard to be normal about it. they make it back to gordie's apartment.
as they make it inside, gordie, drunk on both alcohol and the overwhelming feeling of being cared for for the first time in ages, tries to kiss darnold. darnold is a hopeless romantic to me. she wants to accept so bad but she's responsible, so she laughs it off and tells gordie they should get her to bed. gordie agrees and within minutes she's out like a light.
darnold stays the night, hopeful for the morning.
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loserdiaz · 1 year
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wip wednesday
@ebdaydreamer @fatedbuddie @eddiesbleps thanks for the tags, loves!
here's a little snippet of a wip i started just... an hour ago lmao.
"I'm leaving the 118." Buck says the words and a sick feeling if deja vu passes through him. "Temporarily," he rushes to add before Eddie can yell at him or Hen can tell him what an idiot he's being, or Chim can make a sarcastic and not at all helpful comment to light up the bad mood surrounding them. "Just for a couple of months." "Buck." Eddie frowns, his lips pursed and an array of emotions swimming in those warm eyes of his that Buck is too tired, too lost to decipher them at that moment. "I've made up my mind, Eddie." Buck cuts him off. "You of all people should understand." "What are you going to do in the meantime? What's the plan, here?" Hen looks at him with so much concern and confusion that it breaks him a little inside. Buck takes a deep breath and then— "I signed up to help with the wildfires happening in Australia. They really could use the help. So… I'm going to help." And this is not a decision he has made lightly. He thought about it for weeks, thought about Dr. Salazar's words and about Maddie's too. Buck is spiraling, pushing everyone away and yeah, he feels so damn alone. And he knows he doesn't need to, he knows everyone is there for him. But they also have their own family units, they have their partners and their own things and Buck is a 30 year old failure that comes home to an empty, pathetic loft every night. He once thought maybe Eddie and him— But no. He just— He needs to leave. For a few months. Take a step back.
tagging some ppl (i know im so late so don't feel obligated to do it): @cowboy-buddie @buddierights @monsterrae1 @alyxmastershipper @comaboybuck @rogerzsteven @swiftiebuckleys @buddiefication @bigfootsmom @spaceprincessem @hippolotamus @shortsighted-owl @the-likesofus @honestlydarkprincess and anyone else who wants to do it!
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thequietkid-moonie · 1 year
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Hey could you do a Mikan with a reader who pampers a lot her?
S/O pampers her a lot
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[ HEADCANONS ] [ Mikan Tsumiki ]
[ Danganronpa 2 Goodbye Despair ]
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I started writing your request almost immediately after receiving it!! I love danganronpa and im in love with Mikan (seriously im down bad for her)
Thank u so much for requesting this!! I hope you like it as much as I did ❤️
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Being able to be in a relationship with Mikan has been a difficult and slowly process because it take her a long time to accept that you don't hate her, let alone that you love her
Mikan has been abused so much in her entire life that for her you being kind to her is already like heaven, and being in a relationship with a person that she loves, someone who loves and care for her make her wanting to cry of happiness
Almost all your demonstrations of love make her heart skip a beat and bring tears of joy to her eyes, it doesn't matter if you express your love by words, actions or even both, her reaction will be pretty much the same for a long time
Just like it take her a long time to fully accept that you love her it will take her a long time to get used to how much you pamper her. She doesn't know how to react or respond to such demonstrations of love and she may think that you are trying to win something from her (to which she will respond that you don't have to, if you want something from her you just have to ask)
Mikan is so used to all kind of physical abuse that when you come and hold her so gently and sweetly, or even excitedly it startle her at first, but when she realice that you aren't going to hurt her she accept it and even start crying (and apologizing for crying)
She doesn't take really well the surprises, if touch her without warning her first she will scream in surprise and even ask to please don't hurt her, specially at the start of the relasionship or when she is too stressed. Once Mikan gets used to physical affection she loves the most when you pet her head or give her a little kisses, it doesn't make her too nervous or shy and gives her a silent reasurance that you love her
If you cuddle her it would take her a while to be able to stay still for how nervous she is of ruin it, as well as scare of touching you and get comfortable because she doesn't know if she should, but soon she will end up loving cuddle you, it makes her feel safe for the first time in her life
Compliments and praises make her super flustered, she was only praised when she does dirty stuff (like imitating animals), and normally doesn't go further than saying that she did a good job or that they aren't mad or hate her, but with you is a completely different story, complimenting her for her qualities and beauty and not because she did something for you is completely new for her, so any time you praise her she quickly becomes a blushing mess and start stuttering incomprehensible words (what lead her to apologize for being an embarrasing mess or at least that is what she says)
If you want to give her gifts you have to explain that you are giving something to her as a way of showing you love for her and not because is something you don't want anymore or is usless (she hasn't recived an actual gift and people just used to throw their trash to her), and not matter how much time it pass she never get fully used to receiving gifts
However, receiving gifts makes her feel obligate to reciprocate the gesture (specially if is something that she likes a lot), so she will immediatly tell you that if there something she could do for you in exchange you just have to ask, she is willing to do everything for you no matter what it is, it would take her a long time to get used to the idea that you do it out of love and not because you want something in exchange
As well giving her something related to medicine is a really good idea because she really likes that kind of things (she loves alcohol), however, you better don't gift her something too big because it scare her
Also, something that will make her feel flattered and special is that you actually heard her, in the past everyone just ignore her or react bad whenever she tries to express herself, so if you directly ask her for her opinion is surprising for her, the first time she will just respond really shyly and will even apologize for get carry away with the conversation but at the time pass and you continue insisting that you want to hear her opinion she will start to get used to it and will start to speak her mind more often (still pretty shyly)
As well making her feel wanted and needed is enough to make her happy, one of the mainly reasons she becomes a nurse is because she loves that others need her and rely on her (in a not abusive way) so if you rely on her, let her take care of you from time to time or even express directly that you are happy with her by your side it makes her immensely happy
For how much love you pamper her just because you love her and want to it would give Mikan the opportunity to start letting behind that idea of letting other people abuse her in order of not being alone and start thinking that maybe she actually deserve to be respected and can be forgiven without having to let them use her (although this is going to be a long process, but still this is a start)
However, in the other hand Mikan loves how you treat her and she is finally to feel safe and even happines for once in her life, so she will grow pretty clingy and dependent of you
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