#and in that episode where she waited for him but ultimately sacrificed herself so that he could be happy with younger her

[i-looove-dillydallying]

11th doctor era spoiler alert!!!

I think an interesting part of Amy and Rory’s dynamic is that she consistently chooses to die for him whereas he chooses to live for her

[zukosdualdao]

i've been seeing the take recently that what aang is actually encouraging katara to do is to forgive herself and that he’s not explicitly encouraging or expecting her to forgive yon rha.

the ironic thing is that i do think part of what katara needed from the experience of confronting yon rha was to let go of the guilt she held for her mother sacrificing herself for katara. i find this especially evident in the scene where she recounts the story to zuko and remarks that she's "not the helpless little girl" she was when they came, and how enraged she becomes when yon rha asks who kya was protecting. but though she ultimately chooses not to take revenge, katara facing yon rha and realizing what he did is about him and what kind of person he is and was never her fault is ultimately a good thing. it’s not an easy or fun experience, but i do think it was a very necessary one.

i might be somewhat less critical of aang in this episode if that actually was what he was saying (though if he went about it in the exact same way, i would still find it condescending and not a productive way of reaching out to her.)

but that’s just… literally not what he’s saying.

Zuko: Sokka told me the story of what happened. I know who did it and I know how to find him. Aang: Um ... and what exactly do you think this will accomplish? Katara [Shakes her head in dismay.] Ugh, I knew you wouldn't understand. [Begins to walk away.] Aang: Wait! Stop! I do understand. You're feeling unbelievable pain and rage. How do you think I felt about the sandbenders when they stole Appa? How do you think I felt about the Fire Nation when I found out what happened to my people? Zuko: She needs this, Aang. This is about getting closure and justice. Aang: I don't think so. I think it's about getting revenge. Katara [Angrily.] Fine, maybe it is! Maybe that's what I need! Maybe that's what he deserves! Aang: Katara, you sound like Jet.

i think this is the one interaction between aang and katara in which you could maybe argue that he wants her to forgive herself, as he brings up something he's expressed guilt about before, in the storm, (running away before the fire nation killed the air nomads), and she comforted him there and encouraged him not to feel guilty.

but the thing is, he doesn't say anything about how she shouldn't feel guilty. he tries to acknowledge what she's feeling, which is good, but if he was honestly trying to encourage her to forgive herself, i think he would remind her of how she comforted him when he expressed his own guilt. i'm not even totally sure how in tune he is with her guilt. it's not something he mentions when expressing he knows how she feels. (and this isn't me saying he's awful to not know that; it's not something he can necessarily know unless she's expressed it to him, which we haven't seen. but we have seen her try to connect with him over her mother’s death to empathize with him in the southern air temple, and he doesn’t really acknowledge it. so, i do think it shows he has an overly simplistic understanding of her emotions, and that he's not thinking about this in the framework of forgiving oneself.)

if the writers wanted to showcase him encouraging her to forgive herself, they could have had aang say something like, "i know how badly losing your mother must have hurt, but it wasn't your fault, and i'm worried that confronting the man who killed her won't help you."

instead, he immediately makes an argument about moral corruption - he thinks it is about revenge and expresses she sounds like jet because of it. that... is not encouraging her to forgive herself. it's a judgment based on morality. you can argue about whether aang's right or not (i, personally, find his stance reductive in context, but to each their own), but he is absolutely being judgmental here.

this is when the concept of forgiveness comes up:

Katara: Now that I know he's out there ... now that I know we can find him, I feel like I have no choice. Aang: Katara, you do have a choice: forgiveness. Zuko: That's the same as doing nothing! Aang: No, it's not. It's easy to do nothing, but it's hard to forgive. Katara: It's not just hard, it's impossible. [Cuts to overhead shot of the field as she walks away, Zuko following behind.]

in it, aang encourages forgiveness directly after katara expresses she feels she has no choice but to confront her mother’s killer. even if aang does mean forgiveness for herself, katara does not hear it that way, as is made evident by the fact she insists forgiveness would be impossible here, and if he does mean forgiveness for herself, i don't know why he wouldn't try to correct that misunderstanding.

Aang: So you were just gonna take Appa anyway? Katara: Yes. Aang: It's okay, because I forgive you. [Pauses.] That give you any ideas?

this might actually be my least favorite part of the episode. while it is generally not nice to take a friend's sky bison without permission, it is so genuinely condescending and a false equivalence to even try to compare that to the murder of her mother, particularly because of how smug aang is about his example of forgiving her for it.

also, aang is trying to "give [her] ideas" about what she should do, and it's clear he doesn't blame himself for katara taking appa. he is not forgiving himself here and telling her that’s what she should do. his point is that he's forgiving her and thinks she should do the same. (for the man. who murdered. her mother. and, while we're at it, would have murdered katara herself if he knew the truth. it is just... not the same situation at all.)

Katara: Don't try to stop us. Aang: I wasn't planning to. This is a journey you need to take. You need to face this man. [Katara situates herself on Appa's head.] But when you do, please don't choose revenge. Let your anger out, and then let it go. Forgive him.

aaaand there we have it.

aang 100% wants and tells katara to forgive her mother's killer. even if you think he also wants her to find healing (which i actually agree he does want for her, but i don't think he expresses it well/in a way that is likely to reach her, and the show acts like he is wise for this regardless) and forgive herself (if he does realize katara needs this, it's not something he expresses), he also very much does absolutely tell katara to forgive her mother's murderer, and that she won't find healing without doing so.

you can agree or disagree with his stance, but that is absolutely the argument he is making, and it’s weird to try to act like it’s not.

and, as i said before, i personally find it reductive. there are things in this world that we should be angry at. there are things people find impossible to forgive. those things may be different for everyone, but they do exist, and that's completely morally neutral. i find the idea that katara has to forgive the man who killed her mother in an act of imperalist violence in order to find healing and inner peace disturbing. no, actually, she doesn't!

this ideology is also very commonly weaponized against abuse survivors in particular, which is a big part of why it is significant that zuko goes with katara on this journey and defends her right not to forgive yon rha, even as he later also respects her decision not to kill him, which shatters the whole false dichotomy of forgiveness vs revenge being presented by aang’s role in the episode.

we don't actually see the talk in which zuko tells aang about what happened, but based on his perspective the whole episode, i very much doubt he framed it as "katara decided to forgive yon rha."

Aang: Zuko told me what you did. Or what you didn't do, I guess. I'm proud of you. Katara: I wanted to do it. I wanted to take out all my anger at him, but I couldn't. I don't know if it's because I'm too weak to do it or because I'm strong enough not to. Aang: You did the right thing. Forgiveness is the first step you have to take to begin healing. Katara [Rises from boardwalk.]: But I didn't forgive him. I'll never forgive him.

aang hears about what happened and assumes that because katara didn't kill yon rha, she forgave him, and katara corrects him. she (quite angrily) tells aang that she didn’t forgive yon rha, and she never will. katara knows exactly what aang was telling her to do, and even at the end of the episode, it’s clear she resents it and resents aang being “proud of her” for his assumption.

[ideal-girl]

Remember Sam’s story, where she got pregnant and ended up with Mandy? What is your Headcanons as to how the first bouts of intimacy she had with Mandy turned out; given the last time it really turned her life on a downward spiral?

Sam will lack faith and trust in others because of what she went through with her pretend friends, ex, and mother. They taught her that love is either conditional or completely non-existent. She will probably regain or maintain her innocence (or naivety) because that is her character, but she will become pessimistic and struggle with self-resentment. That innocence will allow her to be open to Mandy initially, but her worldview will disadvantage the both of them as their relationship grows and they become intimate. 

Mandy is genuine in her treatment of Sam. This is what she's been wanting to do for a very long time. Sam might doubt that because Mandy was the popular, mean girl back in high school, and the father of Sam's daughter was a manipulative jock who pretended to love her. He did it so that Sam would be intimate with him, and he left the minute she got pregnant. What if Mandy does the same thing? What if Mandy leaves the moment things get tough? Sam fears physical intimacy, even if she desires it, because the last time she had intercourse with someone she got pregnant and lost everything. 

Her relationship with Mandy is not like the relationship she had with her ex. I think that Sam would ultimately trust Mandy and believe in her, but she will still think that something will go wrong after they have intercourse. That's just her mindset. She thinks that a sinkhole will form and swallow everything, just because she had physical contact with someone she loved. She doesn't understand that her previous relationship turned out so terribly because the guy was a liar and a user, not just because she slept with him.

I think that Sam will know the difference between intercourse with a user and intercourse with a woman who has been waiting for her for years. It's a totally difference experience, and what intimacy should have always been for her. Sam will feel like she's in a real relationship with someone who truly loves her, and then the pessimism and self-resentment will surface.

Sam doesn't deserve to be happy. She's a terrible daughter and an even worse mother, and it's all her fault. How could she have been so stupid?! She sacrificed her studies to sleep with some guy, became pregnant because she was irresponsible, and her daughter had to suffer through poverty because of her stupid decisions. She even ran down Mandy with the car, and here she is making her life better despite being injured. Does Sam really deserve a happy ending, after every thing she's done wrong to other people? 

There are a few episodes that show how willing Sam is to sacrifice herself for the sake of justice. She spoke out against hyper-materialism ("Evil Heiress Much?") and the use of automation to displace workers ("I, Dude"). She also discovered a way to make fuel out of the make-up clogging the sewer system, which could be used to power jets. She really wants to make the world a better place, but she doesn't seem to understand that other people's lives are not really up to her.

Mandy chose to be in her life out of love. She's not doing charity work. She's not being coerced. This is what she always wanted to do with Sam, and she finally can. It would be really unfortunate if Sam were to push Mandy way out of this odd sense of justice, but it could happen if Sam doesn't develop a more accurate worldview. 

I'm thinking that Mandy could help her with that. She can help Sam forgive herself for her own mistakes, and recognize that she's not responsible for her pretend friends and her ex's decisions, nor is she is responsible for her mother choosing to disown her. Sam will probably become a lot more hopeful and optimistic again in her relationship, and you know, things will turn out fine. Or at least, I'd like for them to. 

I probably could have written this better, but I'm pretty content with how I feel about Sam being intimate with Mandy after everything that happened to her. She's still overly optimistic in a sense, but will become hesitant in some aspects of the relationship. That will take some soul-searching and self-acceptance, and it's possible for a true happy ending to be achieved through that.

[powerbottomblake]

the P in Penny stands for (V8′s) Protagonist

So Monstra! Interesting name! Reminiscent of Monstro, the name of the whale from Disney’s Pinocchio (1940).

This confirms that the whale is indeed, here to complete Penny’s Pinocchio allusion. In other terms, Penny is the protagonist of this volume. The main conflict is her conflict; taking down the whale is her endgame and her turning point.

More undercut because apparently I am cursed with not knowing how to make brief and to the point meta

We know that RWBY uses the narrative beats of the original allusions (with some decisive tweaks that align with its overall hopepunk vision and themes), going as far as having direct visual parallels to the source material (Adam vs Bees fight/the original Beast vs Gaston fight anyone?). 

In the original Pinocchio movie, Pinocchio is tested three times before finally achieving becoming a little boy, and I think, likewise, Penny faces three tests before becoming a fully flledged huntress and maiden:

- Setback n°1: Pinocchio, still new to the world, the very concept of morality but eager to “do good” and willing to listen to Jiminy Cricket’s guidance, is tricked by a duo of conmen; in the movie, it’s into captivity, but the original story takes a much darker turn where the evil cat and fox - one pretending to be blind (Emerald and her perception bending Semblance) and one pretending to be a cripple (Mercury) - actually cause Pinocchio’s “death” through hanging (the author abhorred naughty children and was very...extreme about it). This is V3 Penny in a nutshell, discovering friendship and bonds and values through her own Jiminy, which is Ruby, but being set up by Mercury and Emerald to fight a losing battle that ends in her apparent “death”.

- Setback n°2: Pinocchio is embarked on a trip to Pleasure Island, an apparent playground especially catered for everyone to be happy! and have fun! but oh wait they’re actually being turned into jackasses geared for labor or sold to the Dust I mean the salt mines! You’ve guessed it, this is Penny’s V7 arc. Atlas Academy is Penny’s Pleasure Island, masquerading as a safe place where  but the veneer of Ironwood’s civility and apparent conflicted utilitarianism finally cracks to reveal how it’s ultimately a place of indoctrination, producing no actual people-serving Hunters but perfect soldiers concerned more with following orders than doing right, and where the disadvantaged and the poor are ostracized, taken advantage of and ultimately sacrificed. Pinocchio escapes Pleasure Island with Jiminy’s help, but not unscathed, having grown donkey ears and a tail. Likewise, with Ruby’s help and constant strong supportive presence, Penny proves herself fit to receive the maiden powers and escapes Atlas, but she’s still not completely free of Ironwood’s hold, still having to grapple with his and the AceOps’ manipulation tactics, still not sure what her role, who she is and how she fits really are. Which bring us to the third and last test:

- Setback n°3: the Whale. In the original movie, Gepetto gets swallowed by the whale when he tries to follow Pinocchio to Pleasure Island to save him. Pinocchio then dives in, saves Gepetto and, in the process, apparently “dies”, before finally earning his existence as a “real” little boy after that show of bravery and self-sacrifice. And I think these are the beats to look for in Penny’s V8 storyline. As of Episode 3, Penny is about to join Pietro and Maria, and there have been strong hints (and by that I mean we were basically hammered over the head) that she’s about to be “hacked” by Watts. How do the original narrative beats play out? Here’s how I think it fits:

Gepetto is swallowed by Monstro: After Penny is effectively “hacked” and by that I mean that while her soul and spirit remain unchanged, Watts hacks into the mainframe and forces her to surrender control over her body the same way we’ve seen her do (but willingly) for Pietro. Penny essentially ends up trapped inside her own body as it follows Watts’ commands. I suspect Watts will force her to take Pietro and Maria (who’s of interest to Salem by being one of the last remaining SEW, and I strongly suspect her soul/aura could be used to make more of whatever the Hound is, but this is a whole other matter to delve into in a separate post) to Salem.

Pinocchio dives in to save his father and takes down the whale: I think Pietro and/or Ruby will appeal to Penny/be in enough danger that she will snap out of Watts control on her own, effectively reclaiming her bodily autonomy on her own and then creating a mayhem big and terrible enough with her powers that will take down the whale and give everyone else enough time to escape. This will be Penny’s heroic moment and her stand. Right now, everyone is making the mistake of having people protect the maiden powers. Penny realizes what makes her a maiden is to use those powers to protect the people; it’s a decision she makes on her own that cements her as a true Maiden and a hero of the people.

Pinocchio “apparently dies” but is then granted his wish and becomes a “real” little boy: Here I think Penny takes down the whale but goes down with it. We don’t see her die again onscreen (I think it would be overkill to show her “corpse” a second time and would cheapen her dying at all. In general I am wary of the resurrection trope being overdone or coming without a cost because it severely undercuts the emotional payoff of a death), but I think by the end of V8 she’s MIA (which would make her the second person Ruby loses that way, but also the first to return to her so). I think Penny uses her powers to stall Monstra, and I’m willing to bet good money that whatever Penny does next has to do with the Gravity dust that keeps Monstra afloat. The thing with Gravity dust is that, it does push things off the ground, but it can also pull things towards it. I think whatever number Penny pulls on the gravitational field ends up pulling her down in that sillage as well.

I know the popular theory is that Penny “dies” again and Pietro sacrifices his life to resurrect her one last time, and I can see it happening, but here’s the thing: RWBY subverts popular tropes, exploring new (and more hopeful!) paths. Just look at Qrow: RWBY said, oh the mentor figure, scarred and haunted by his past? is not just another stepping stone whose death cements the hero on his journey, but becomes a character with a drive of their own, and an arc of their own, and who gets to pass the torch and live to see it burn well and bright and to the end. Gepetto lives and mourns the apparent death of his son but is there to welcome him home when, rewarded for courage and abnegation, Pinocchio earns the right to become a human boy. I think Pietro, too, will live, and get to welcome a Penny that has finally earned the right to call herself Mantle’s Protector, no longer Ironwood’s puppet (heh) nor an extension of her father but an actual established hero of the people, around whom Mantle can rally and who can work with the right people (Robyn and the Happy Huntresses) for the right reasons and outcomes, people and reasons she herself chooses and decisions she herself makes and a power she’s reclaimed and accepted and knows how to use. 

Penny’s quest has always been one of identity, slowly transforming from getting her bearings and realizing what makes her humanity is her soul, her ability to develop and deepen and protect her bonds to people and her natural empathy and kindness (V3′s ”am I worthy of calling myself human, too?”); to navigating morality, the nuances of doing good and the need to make her own calls and judgement of what is right and wrong (V7′s “who should I protect? what should I follow?”); to now, having established that she’s worthy of being one, Penny still has to find how to be a maiden, what that role entails for her and how she can finally fit as herself and into this new role, 100% reclaiming herself, her body (even from Pietro!!), her title and her mission. V8 (and maybe onwards) is the culmination of Penny’s identity journey, and I see it playing very much as an Iron Giant moment.

“You are who you choose to be,” says RWBY (and Ruby!) to Penny.

“Superman A human, and a hero, and a maiden” will be her answer.

And just like the Iron Giant, Penny saves the world, and rises again.

[worryinglyinnocent]

Fic: Not Quite Right

Summary: Edward and Alphonse Elric succeed in achieving the impossible, committing the ultimate taboo to bring their mother back via human transmutation. Trisha Elric is returned to life, and everything seems to be well in their world. 

It’s subtle at first. The faint smell of decay that hangs around the house. Trisha looking a little bit pale and blue-tinged. The fact she sometimes blacks out and can’t remember what happened or why she’s woken up with the taste of blood in her mouth. 

As much as they try to hide it, they can’t deny that Trisha has come back just a little bit… wrong. 

Written for the WriYe Zombie July challenge.

Rated: M

Content Warning: Mild gore and body horror. Zombies. 

Not Quite Right

Trisha isn’t quite sure what’s going on. All she knows is that something isn’t quite right. She had been in a nice place: a nice, calm, peaceful place where she could wait for Van to eventually join her. She was warm and comfortable, and she wasn’t in any pain. She had been quite happy where she was. 

Then there had been a searing flash of light, and now Trisha doesn’t know where she is, but everything hurts and everything’s cold and everything’s hard, and something really isn’t quite right. 

“Mom!”

That’s Ed’s voice. Why is Ed here? Ed shouldn’t be here, it’s far too soon for Ed to be here. What’s happened?

“Mom! Wake up!”

That’s Al’s voice. Al shouldn’t be here either. 

I can’t wake up, darlings. I’m dead. I’ve been dead for years now. I’ve moved on. What are you doing here?

“Mom!”

Trisha opens her eyes to darkness and cold and a dull ache spreading through every limb. It almost feels like she’s never used her body before. 

“Mom!”

Ed and Al’s voices are no longer so far away. They’re right beside her, and their arms around her are almost scalding in their heat. 

“Ed? Al? What’s going on?”

“It worked! We brought you back!”

Trisha’s eyes get used to the darkness and she realises where she is. She’s in the basement, where Van used to store all of the junk he’d accumulated over his long, long life. The suit of armour is still standing stoic in the corner, watching over them as the boys cling to her for dear life. It’s freezing down here, and Trisha’s not wearing anything, but the boys have wrapped her in a blanket. 

She was dead. She was very definitely dead. 

She looks around at the chalk on the floor, the remains of the intricate transmutation circle that they are all in the middle of. 

“Oh boys… What did you do?”

Trisha is no expert when it comes to alchemy, but she knows that human transmutation is the one thing that they should never attempt, the one taboo that they should never break. Even Van, with his vast, unknowable skill in it, would never try this. The cost, the equivalent exchange… Trisha dreads to think what would have happened if something had gone wrong and there had been a rebound. 

She pushes it to the back of her mind as Ed and Al help her off the floor. She’s back. It’s been a long time; she can see how much the boys have grown and she wonders just how much time has passed, but it doesn’t matter. She has a second chance now. She can keep her promise to Van, and more importantly, more immediately, she has more time with her precious babies. 

Something still doesn’t feel quite right, but she chooses not to dwell on it too much as the feeling of ravenous hunger starts to overwhelm everything else. 

X

It quickly becomes clear that when they decided to bring Mom back, they really didn’t think through all of the implications that doing so would bring if they were successful. 

Human transmutation is forbidden, and they said that they would keep it their secret. The trouble is, they can’t exactly keep Mom a secret now that she’s back. If it had only been a couple of weeks, perhaps, but it’s been six years since she died. She was buried, people came to her funeral, her death is registered at the registry in Resembool and copied down on record in Eastern City. 

Her suddenly appearing in the world again is going to raise a few questions. Still, it’s nothing that Ed can’t handle. They live far enough away from the village that they’re not likely to get people finding her in passing, and all they have to do is make sure she doesn’t leave the house. Mom understands implicitly without questioning them. She knows as well as they do that what they have done is forbidden, but she doesn’t chastise them for it. She’s grateful to be back with them. 

Pinako sums it up best when she comes over to check on them like she always does, regular as clockwork, and although Ed does his best to head her off at the pass with hasty excuses of ‘we’re fine, we’re fine, there’s no need to worry’, he knows that’s the worst way of making someone not worry ever, and Pinako simply sidesteps past him on the lane and continues to march up the path and into the house. Ed rushes after her, and she stops in the doorway of the kitchen, looking at Trisha. 

“Hello, Pinako.”

“Oh boys,” Pinako says softly. “Oh, what have you done, you idiots?”

Still, she doesn’t shout at them. Pinako’s never been shy of telling them exactly what she thinks of all their madcap schemes whenever they have them, but she doesn’t tell them off for this. This is something so big, and something that’s done and over and can’t and won’t be repeated. There’s no point in it. They just have to live with it now, and so Pinako and Winry are let in on their massive secret, and work to help keep it as secret as possible. 

The other problem that Ed cannot deny is that despite their best efforts, it’s clear that something must have gone wrong during the transmutation. He knows that Al can see it too. There’s something about Mom that’s just not quite right. Her skin is always so very cold, as cold as it was when she was dying, and she always exclaims that they are very hot to the touch. It’s a cruel irony in a way. They brought her back because they wanted to hug her again and feel her arms around them, but it’s not the same as it was before, not when she’s so horribly, deathly cold. 

Then there’s the strange smell. It’s almost like decay, the faint odour of rot that permeates the house now. Ed knows that they built Mom a brand new body, transmuting it from base chemicals. This isn’t her original body rotting under the ground in the cemetery, so why is that smell hanging around? 

The final clue that something went wrong is the moments where Mom isn’t really… Mom. She’ll just vanish, her eyes going blank as if there’s no soul behind them. It’s frightening. 

It’s only a couple of weeks after they first get Mom back that it happens, the irrefutable proof that there’s a part of her that isn’t really Mom anymore. Farmer Anderson, whose fields back onto the Elric land, comes over first thing in the morning asking if they heard anything last night because two of his sheep were attacked and killed in the night, by something with too much strength to be a stray dog. 

Perplexed, Ed disclaims all knowledge, but then Al is shouting for him from the basement and he has to rush away.

Mom is in the basement with Al. She’s covered in blood and tufts of wool, and the horror in her eyes is heartbreaking. 

“Boys, what’s happening to me?”

“I’m sorry, Mom.” Ed hugs her. “I’m sorry. We brought you back wrong.”

“It’s ok. It’s ok, my darlings. I’m just scared that I’ll hurt you two.”

Ed thinks of those moments where she’s blank and not there, and suddenly, he’s scared too. He pulls his mind away from those thoughts. 

“You won’t,” he says decisively. “We’ll make sure you won’t.”

X

It’s a very strange routine that they settle into after that, but it’s a routine nonetheless. 

Mom’s ‘episodes’, as Ed euphemistically refers to them, eventually start to become more frequent, and Al dreads to think how many of Farmer Anderson’s sheep have been sacrificed to Mom’s inhuman hunger. She never hurts them, perhaps she retains enough of herself in her primal state to recognise them even when she’s not all there, but it’s been touch and go with her trying to attack Pinako sometimes, to the point where she apologetically forbids Winry from coming over to the Elric house anymore, just in case. 

The smell of decay is a constant presence in the house now, so much so that Al no longer notices it, and it’s only when he finds Mom in the kitchen staring down at the two rotten fingers that have just fallen off her hand that he realises what it really means. 

Still, they’re able to fix her up with medical alchemy whenever bits of her do start to die off, and life continues as it did before. For the most part, they’re content. Mom is herself for most of the time, even if she is cold and decaying slightly, and they can handle her when she’s not herself. She generally knows when she’s ‘fading out’ as she calls it, with about thirty seconds’ warning, and as much as it breaks his heart to do it, Al locks her in the closet under the stairs until she’s back to normal. 

One evening, when Mom is sleeping off one of her raging, inhuman hunger fits, Al voices a thought to Ed. It’s four years since that fateful day when they brought her back, and the question has been eating at him for all that time. 

“Ed… Do you think we did the right thing?”

For a long time, Ed just stares into the middle distance.

“I don’t know,” he admits eventually. “I really don’t know.”

X

It’s a perfectly ordinary day when Trisha sees an extraordinary sight out of the kitchen window where she’s washing the dishes.

“Van.”

“What?” Ed startles up out of his seat and rushes over to the window, but Trisha ignores Al and Pinako telling her to stay where she is, and she rushes out of the kitchen, throwing the front door open and hurrying down the path towards Van. He asked her to wait, and wait she did. Not even death could stop her. 

Ok, it stopped her for a while, and she’s still not quite right, but she’s here, and he’s here, and everything’s going to be ok now. 

Van was never much of a smiler, but he’s positively grinning as he puts his suitcase down and opens his arms for her.

“Trisha.”

He’s so warm, hotter than everyone else is to the point where holding him is almost uncomfortable, but Trisha doesn’t want to let go of him. He’s back, despite everyone’s cynicism. He’s back at last.

“Trisha, you’re freezing. Are you all right?”

She nods against his neck. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine now you’re here.”

“Are you sure?” He pulls back a fraction, his brow furrowed, golden eyes worried behind his glasses. “Trisha, something’s wrong, sweetheart, what is it?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” Trisha says firmly, but she can tell from the little wrinkle of his nose that he’s caught the smell of decay that follows her around almost constantly now. 

Speaking of smells though… Did Van always smell this good? On the face of it, Trisha knows that he shouldn’t smell good. She can smell the travel on him, smell that he hasn’t bathed for a few days. But there’s something else. Something wholly delicious. She cuddles in close again, breathing him in, and he strokes her hair. 

“Oh Trisha,” he whispers. “What happened to you?”

He smells so, so good…

X

“What. Did. You. Do.”

Al never thought that he would ever be in this situation, but then again, it’s a very specific situation so he thinks he can be forgiven for not being prepared. It’s not every day you have to pull your resurrected mother off your ten-years-vanished-and-only-just-returned father when she tries to tear his throat out with her teeth because she’s peckish and only living flesh will do, and now you’re watching your extremely angry father and even angrier brother have an argument whilst standing guard outside the cupboard that your mother is locked in. 

And that’s not even taking into account the fact that the weird stories your mother’s been telling you about your father being a living Philosopher’s Stone and functionally immortal are all true, because despite the blood soaking the front of his shirt, Dad is completely fine for having a large chunk of his neck taken out. 

“We did what we had to do!” Ed yells. “Mom died! She was dead, and you were who knows where, so we did what any half-orphaned, half-abandoned kids would do and we brought her back!”

“There’s a reason it’s forbidden, Edward.”

“Well, maybe if you’d been here, you could have told us that at the time! You left us alone! You have no right to lecture us about breaking the taboo! You do not have the moral high ground here!”

Dad doesn’t reply for a long time. 

“I’m sorry,” he says eventually, and Ed actually takes a step back in surprise, having been ready to launch into another tirade and clearly not expecting the apology. “I’m sorry that you were alone for so long and that this was the only solace you had, and I’m sorry that Trisha never got the chance to tell you what was going on and why I left before she died. I can’t change what’s done, but perhaps I can try to begin making things better now.”

Ed is breathing heavily, about to explode from the emotion, and since Mom is quiet in the cupboard now, Al chances to take a couple of steps forward to get between the two of them in case Ed decides to just resort to punching Dad in the face, which Al is pretty sure he would have done already if it wasn’t for the ravenous Mom and profuse bleeding and alchemical healing going on before he had the chance. 

“We don’t need your help,” Ed growls eventually, hands balled up into fists but showing no signs of actually swinging. “We got on perfectly fine without you for ten years, so just go back wherever you’ve been hiding and don’t bother us again.”

“No, you probably don’t need me,” Dad agrees quietly. “I know I don’t have much right to try and insert myself back into your lives as if I’d never left. I don’t expect to. But it’s not just you two. I came back for Trisha as well.”

They’ve been talking about her as if she’s not there, but she’s only a few steps away behind the cupboard door, and Al can see the guilt in Ed’s eyes as he glances over. They can’t leave Mom out of this. They’ve had to make a lot of decisions on her behalf over the last few years, but this isn’t one of them. Mom has always believed in Dad. She’s always waited for him and she’s always known that he was coming back, and in the end, he kept that promise to her. It took a long time, but he did come back, just as he told her he would. 

And as much as they have always tried to deny it and pretend that everything’s good, because a not-quite-right Mom was better than no Mom at all, the fact remains that when they brought Mom back, they brought her back wrong, and maybe Dad, with his centuries of knowledge and Philosopher’s Stone’s worth of power, can make her right again. 

X

“Her soul hasn’t bound to her body properly. That’s what’s making her black out and resort to a primal state, and it’s why her body is rotting. The body will decay without a soul in it. Her soul is still partially trapped beyond the gate, and it’s trying to get back there.”

Mom is tucked up in bed, still asleep from her last episode. Hohenheim has just fixed up the latest patch of decay on her chest. 

Ed notes the lack of blame in Hohenheim’s words. It would have been easy for him to say you didn’t bind her soul properly, but he doesn’t. 

“Can we fix it?” Al asks. 

“No.” The single word is sharp and blunt. “No. There’s nothing you and Ed can do. There’s a huge price to pay. The equivalent exchange for a human life is too much for either of you to bear and I won’t lose you. I can try and fix it.”

“What do you mean, try?” Ed hates how small and young his voice sounds. “Can you fix it or not?”

Hohenheim dodges the question. “When you first brought her back, what did you use for the exchange?”

Ed reels off the chemical components of the human body; he’s had them down rote for years now.

“And a drop of blood from both of us to anchor the soul,” Al adds once he’s done. 

Hohenheim nods, his eyes still on Mom. 

“It wasn’t enough,” he says. “Human transmutation requires a much greater sacrifice. A life for a life, a soul for a soul. Sometimes more than that. Often, not even that is enough and the transmutation will fail no matter what is sacrificed.”

Having heard the story of his immortality now, Ed has to give him that, and not even grudgingly. All things considered, he and Al got off extremely lightly, and the guilt that Mom is suffering now as a result eats away at him a little bit more.

“Can you fix it?” he asks again. 

“I can try. I should be able to provide the exchange with the souls, and they’re willing to make that sacrifice for Trisha.” He smiles. “They always loved her. She won them all over in the end.”

“But…” Ed prompts. That makes it sound way too easy. 

“But ultimately, it’s up to Trisha whether her soul returns or stays beyond the gate. You can’t force someone to come back to life if they don’t want to.”

Ed hadn’t thought about it like that. He had always assumed that Mom would want to come back. She died before her time and now they’ve given her more time with her family, they’ve allowed her to be there for when Hohenheim got back, just as she promised she would be. But then again, he’s never thought about what happens after death, beyond the gate as Hohenheim called it. Her soul had been somewhere, and if all the accounts of heaven and the afterlife are to be believed, then it was a nice, peaceful place that perhaps she might not have wanted to leave after all. 

He doesn’t want to think about it. 

X

Trisha can taste blood in her mouth again when she wakes up. The boys are always so good about cleaning her up when she has one of her episodes, but they can’t really brush her teeth easily when she’s out of it. 

“Hey, Trisha.” 

A gentle hand strokes her hair and she looks to the side to see Van lying on the bed beside her. 

“Did I hurt you?”

Van shakes his head. “No damage done.” He presses a kiss to her forehead and Trisha is reminded once again of the blood in her mouth, getting up to brush her teeth. She looks at herself in the mirror above the sink, taking in her blue-ish tinted skin and lips, and her eyes several shades darker than they always used to be back when she’d been alive the first time. She’s amazed that Van can even recognise her now, but he’s still looking at her as if she’s the sun and the moon and the stars all rolled into one. He doesn’t care that she’s a little bit wrong, but at the same time, it breaks her heart just a bit. 

She returns to the bedroom, hovering in the doorway. 

“Van?”

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry I’m not… fully me. I wanted to be here when you got back, but I don’t think that all of me is here.”

“I know.” Van comes over and takes her in his arms, and Trisha wishes she could stay there forever and not have to worry about anything else. “I know. I think I can make you whole again. I think I know how to give you the chance to fix yourself.”

Trisha nods. “Thank you.” There’s a long pause. “You’re going to use the souls, aren’t you?”

“Yes. They’ve talked it through. They’re happy to help make you whole.”

“Thank you.” She whispers against his chest, hoping that the souls can hear her. “Thank you, all of you.”

“They say you’re welcome.”

Trisha closes her eyes, trying to lose herself in his embrace. 

“Will it hurt?”

“No, my love. I promise.” He holds her a little tighter before letting go. “Come on. Let’s get you fixed.”

Van takes her down into the basement. The boys are there too, drawing out a complex circle on the floor in chalk. Trisha shivers. She doesn’t like it down here, it brings back too many bad memories of waking up after a black out episode with no memory of what she did or who she might have hurt, the taste of blood in her mouth making her feel sick. Nonetheless, she accepts that what Van is about to do is not something that should be done anywhere that people might witness it by accident. 

Van gives the circle a onceover and proclaims it perfect with soft pride in his voice. Trisha knows that human transmutation is the one thing he would never do, and whilst he might be mad at the boys for doing what they did, he can’t help but admire their craftsmanship when they did it.

She steps into the centre of the circle with him.

“Van, I’m scared.”

“It’s ok, love. I’m right here. It’ll all be ok.”

He takes her in his arms and she closes her eyes, burying her face in against his shoulder. Even then, she can still see the flash of red alchemic lightning race around the edge of the circle. 

Everything is bright white and jumbled, her mind feeling like it’s tearing itself apart and putting itself back together again over and over at the speed of light. It doesn’t hurt, just as Van promised, but it’s disorientating and frightening and it makes her feel dizzy. She can still feel Van’s arms around her but she feels totally alone and adrift at the same time. 

Finally the sensation stops. Everything is still bright white, but Van is definitely real and solid and her mind has reordered itself again. 

Trisha chances to open her eyes. Everything is very white, apart from the ominous looming gate floating in front of them. 

Although she doesn’t remember ever seeing it before, Trisha knows that she’s been here before. She’s been beyond that gate. She remembers that nebulous time before the boys brought her back. It was calm, and warm, and peaceful, and she was enjoying it. She didn’t have to worry about anything. She could just wait for Van and the boys to join her, however long that took, and she knew that everything would be all right in the end. 

Trisha is incredibly grateful for the extra time she’s had with her sons but now that she’s back here, within touching distance of that wonderfully peaceful afterlife with nothing to worry about, she realises just how much she missed it. 

“Trisha. You’re back again already? And you too, Hohenheim. We didn’t really get a chance to speak the last time you were here. You were screaming a bit too much.”

Trisha turns to the source of the voice. It’s just an outline, a silhouette, strange and amorphous and shifting, sometimes appearing female, sometimes male, mirroring first her and then Van as if it can’t make its mind up. 

“I’ve come to pay the toll for Trisha’s soul,” Van says levelly. 

“Of course, the living Philosopher’s Stone.” The outline smiles, unnerving teeth in the middle of a featureless face. “Well, if you’re willing to sacrifice those souls, I’ll take them. It’s not your choice to make though. It’s Trisha’s soul you want to anchor, after all.”

The thing turns to Trisha. 

“It’s up to you. Where would you like to stay?”

X

The lightning is still blazing around the circle, the powerful red lightning of a Philosopher’s Stone, something unlike Ed and Al have ever seen, and Al is starting to get just a little bit worried. It didn’t take this long when they brought Mom back the first time. It feels like Mom and Dad have been gone forever. He looks over at Ed.

“Something’s wrong. It’s taking too long.”

Ed shakes his head, but his expression looks just as worried as Al feels.

“It’ll be ok. Mom has to make the decision after all. It’s a pretty big one.”

Al supposes he has to accept that, but at the same time, he can’t help wondering what will happen if Mom decides not to come back. 

She’s always been happy to be back with them, to have more time with them and the potential for more time with Dad. But Al can’t deny that her second life hasn’t been easy for any of them, and even if she comes back complete with her soul fully bonded and she won’t be affected by her primal hunger anymore, it’s still not going to be easy. It’s still not going to be much of a life, stuck in the house all day because no one else can know what they did. And what if Dad’s internal Stone doesn’t have enough power to bring her back after all? What if they lose both of them?

Suddenly, the alchemic light is gone, the electric lightbulb is blown out from the power, and Al can’t see a thing. He hears a rather ominous thud though. 

“Mom? Dad?” 

X

“Hey Mom.” 

Ed pats her headstone and sets the flowers down in front of it. It took him a long time to come to terms with what happened and to accept her decision. He still remembers the flood of bitter recriminations that had come out of his mouth when they’d realised that Dad had come back from the gate without Mom, and he remembers Dad not taking any of it in because he’d only had Mom back for a few hours before he lost her again.

“She said that she was sorry not to come back and have more time with you, but that this is the best way for everyone. She wants you to be able to move on from it all. She’ll see us all when we get there. She loves you both so much. So, so much.”

“We’re ok.” He settles on the ground in front of the stone. “Dad and his motley crew of tame alchemists managed to save the world. I like to think they couldn’t have done it without us though.” In the back of his mind, he hears Mom’s laughter. “And we think he’s mortal again; he’s started going grey. We don’t know if he’s actually noticed that or not.”

There’s a long pause. 

“I understand why you did it,” Ed says eventually. “I didn’t, for a long time. I was so angry. I thought that you’d abandoned us like Dad did. Except that was more complicated than we always thought, and I know that your choice was more complicated too. You would always have been a reminder that we broke the taboo, and even though I know you never complained about it, I know it must have been hard for you to have to be kept secret all the time. None of us had any idea if it would have worked properly.  It wasn’t worth that risk. It wasn’t worth that pain. I’m sure that you’re happy wherever you are.”

He gives the stone a final pat. “I love you, Mom.”

X

In the quiet peace beyond the gate, Trisha Elric smiles.

“I love you too, Ed.”

[lizacstuff]

Hello, Liza! I hope you are doing well. Passing by because I (and everyone else I think) would like to know your thoughts about episode 25. I watch this show trying my best to avoid spoilers but today somehow I ended up seeing everything. Twitter was and still is mad about the episode and I thought I was going to have the same reaction as them. Surprise, surprise, I didn't which left me speechless. I feel like you might have the same reaction as me so I would love to know your thoughts! xo

Hello! I have a lot of asks and rather than flooding my dash, I think I’ll put them all in one place, so this is going to get very long.  I have mixed feelings. I didn’t hate it, but it was a hard episode to watch.

I wish I had seen the reaction before I watched, then I would have adjusted my expectations. The whole time I was waiting for a twist at the end that didn’t come. Partly because of my own speculation, but partly because I’d watch the live with Hande and Kerem and from the translations, Kerem said there was a shock at the end and called the ending beautiful. Never trust Kerem! LMAO. Not because he would ever intentionally mislead, but boyfriend never remembers anything that happens in any episode. Though he was right about the shock, just not about it being beautiful. (Prince be crazy!) Anyway I kept hoping for the twist of them working together and fooling everyone and it didn’t come. 

So I was disappointed at the end, but with adjusted expectations the episode, taken for what it is, is actually decent and I can definitely get onboard with Eda sacrificing everything to save him. That’s very romantic and they did a great job of setting up how devastated she was and how serious the threat is from Babaanne. Eda did not crumble in the face of a couple of idle threats. No, every moment that Eda waited to break up with him, Babaanne introduced some very real and catastrophic consequence to Serkan or his family. Shit got real and Eda was pushed into a no-win corner and needed to act fast. I’ll talk about that more, but first, I’ll mention a couple of thoughts about the writing and the new writers:

(more under the cut)

Good

Structure - The structure of the episode was a lot better than last week.  Scenes actually made sense one after the other, the emotions of the characters were consistent and it all flowed. 

Plot - I’m not necessarily praising what happened in the episode, more that there was one. And it’s one that will not be forgotten in the next episode and it feels like this plot could sustain a number of episodes which his necessary if the show is to continue.

Characterizations  - The characters felt true to what we’ve watched the last 20+ episodes. As I said above, work went into showing us both Eda and Serkan’s mindset and how that led to the ultimate outcome. It’s impressive that they put together one of the most heartbreaking breakup scenes I’ve seen, and the characters weren’t actually even together. 

Not-so-good

Proposal dream - I’m not a big fan of fooling the audience like this, and I’m really not a big fan of putting it in a teaser or promo. That is a bait and switch, and I think it’s a cheap trick for the production company to have featured it in the fragman. Badly done.  In next week’s fragman we see Serkan “punching” the Prince, I fear that is not real, possibly Serkan’s fantasy, and I’m really hoping that “fake scenes” are not going to be the go-to for these new writers. We’ve already spent 50+ hours with Eda and Serkan, we don’t need to see imaginary things, we need real scenes. No fake outs at this juncture. 

Humor and ‘sparkle’ - I think this is what’s going to be missing from the new writer’s scripts. They tried really hard with the game night at the newlywed’s house and Chef Alexander love triangle, (Team Aydan all the way, Ayfer can fuck off. If she doesn’t care about her niece’s happiness, then she shouldn’t get any herself) but it just didn’t get there comedy wise. Ayse really had a way of pulling together very funny scenarios and making everything sparkle, and I’ll miss that. 

Lack of Edser - This is their show, they are the ONLY reason most people watch. You can’t build a plot that separates them. When Serkan broke up with Eda they were able to build a scenario where they were still thrown together all of the time, and kept finding excuses to be with the other. Their screen time didn’t suffer that much. I’m not sure this scenario will allow the same with him being at risk if Babaanne spots them together.  However, for this episode I’m willing to give the benefit of the doubt as @jan31​ brought up to me, Kerem and Hande were very busy last week with rehearsals and then shooting The Voice, so that might have contributed to why there was so much focus on the other characters this ep, they needed to release the leads for other commitments. 

hawaiigirl84 said: So I'm on a SCK Facebook group looking at a lot of irate fans. If you haven't seen the episode yet, I think you're going to have to gird your loins for this one.

@hawaiigirl84 Haha. I wish I’d seen this ask so I could have adjusted expectations. I went on twitter last night and then backed away slowly. Lots of dramatic rending of garments and gnashing of teeth.  You know the fan reaction is bad when both the producer Asena and Nesliyan (Aydan) tweeted out reassurances about the journey to love and then this morning the production company twitter account released video of Eda kissing Serkan in the jail. Trying to feed the fans who were out for blood, I’d guess. 

Anonymous said: Okay so the latest episode of SCK had to be the show creating a very low point for Eda & Serkan in order to build them back up, right? My thought after the episode ended was that things honestly could not get worse. That episode was just disappointing. While I get why Eda did what she did I still absolutely hated it and was pissed the writers could not come up with something better. And how heartbreaking was it to realize the proposal scene was a dream 😭. And now they released a clip showing Eda did kiss Serkan in the jail cell but they decided to cut it out? I get that the show has to create drama but the promotion of the episode as being super romantic was certainly a gut punch. The fragman has me hopefully that Eda & Serkan might finally work together to bring down Grandma or at least Eda will let him in on her plan. I will say even though that episode hurt the actors were absolutely killing it.

Are we the same person?? I think I went through all of these thoughts/emotions since watching, lmao.  

And 100% they are taking Eda and Serkan to their low point before building them back up. Also, think about it, after this they will both have a much better understanding of one another. Eda will understand how he could have made the decision to breakup rather than confide in her, and Serkan will understand why doing what he did hurt her so much and why it wasn’t easy for her to get over it. They’ll both have experienced the situation from all sides.  Ultimately, this will make them stronger.

Honestly, Eda has a LOT better reason to do what she’s doing than Serkan did. As I said above, Evil!Granny is not playing. She is deadly serious and seems to be capable of anything. In the course of 48 hours she had manufactured charges against Serkan that were serious and landed him in jail, she caused him to lose the tender they’d won which would have huge ripple affects for the business, and she was able to set up Alptekin and get him thrown in jail. At this point I could see her ordering a hit! Eda needed to call her off and get her to stop or who the heck knows would have happened to Serkan, Aydan and the business in the next 24 hours. Eda needed to move fast and she needed to be convincing. 

Right now I think Eda is just buying time, so Serkan is safe while she tries to fight her grandmother.  No way she’s rolling over. Not Eda. I’m still very hopeful that Serkan will figure out what she’s up to sooner rather than later and they will start to work together. 

Also, YES, to the performances. The actors were stellar. Hande and Kerem both brought it. I physically felt their pain.

Anonymous said: I'm completely convinced that the writers' room for this last episode wrote it without any knowledge of ep 24 except for the fact that it ended with Serkan getting arrested on NYE. Like I still wouldn't like it, but if we had gone from ep 23 to ep 25, it would make more sense. But not after ep 24. Did Ayse just say "fuck it" while writing that episode and gave the fans everything she could knowing full well what the other writers' plans were? Talk about some severe whiplash.

I don’t know what the background is on the writer change, but I don’t think this is fair.  I got whiplash from the fragman (proposal) to the episode, but not from ep 24 to this one. When watching ep 24 didn’t you think it was just a matter of time before the other shoe dropped? I thought that it was obvious that a dark cloud was gathering, just as Eda was willing to start fresh with him. Babaanne directly threatened Serkan several times to Eda. She told Eda she would destroy Serkan if she found they were together.  Episode 24 was Eda being defiant and letting herself be with Serkan and this episode was the consequences of that.  

There are things to criticize, but I completely disagree with you that this is one.

Anonymous said: I think Eda didn't say ily at that time because she must have already thought about maybe accepting what her grandmother had asked for. It would have been weird if she told him I love you and then broke up with him right afterwards. It wasn't the right time, I think the writers are saving it for a big confession like in episode 11. At least for now we could hear her say it in her dream.

Agreed on the timing, and you’re right about the dream. While I am annoyed they put it in the trailer, in the narrative it did serve to tell us exactly where Eda’s head is at in regards to their relationship.  She loves Serkan, she wants to marry Serkan.  So we know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that none of her actions are because of any lingering “confusion,” right now she is acting out of pure love for him. That’s beautiful. (maybe that’s what Kerem meant by the ending being beautiful, lmao) 

Anonymous said: Eda really breaking him by called what they had a mistake and threwing him the parents death in his face like it was his fault, he doesn’t deserve all this. At least im happy serkan walked away first! although he loves her with all his being, he's fed up with Eda behaviour... if she really wants him, she has to fight for him.

Oh boy. 

You understand that Eda didn’t mean anything she said, right?  That the only way for her to convince Serkan she was serious was to bring out the big guns, and that she only did it to save him?

Yes, that was hard to watch. My heart absolutely breaks for Serkan. Actually, it breaks for both of them.  But it’s supposed to, they are in love, and Babaanne is tearing them apart. Did you watch Eda all episode? She was devastated the entire time. That’s one of the reasons this ep was hard to watch. It’s hard to see a beloved character be at that low of a point for 2 straight hours.  

This storyline will be easier for you to watch if you reframe this from applauding Serkan for being “fed up” at Eda, to Eda loving him so much that she is going to do whatever is necessary to save him.  She sacrificed and now she’s going to risk it all fighting Babaanne, and all of it is for LOVE. 

Anonymous said: The ending is so ridiculous, and let's not even talk about the fragman of the next episode I really don't know if I want to continue watching

Okay, you’ve just hit my pet peeve. DO NOT come into my inbox with flounce threats. I don’t care if you watch or not. If you’re done, fine, move on, no need to announce it on anon or add it to any of my posts. Because why even talk about something you’re not going to watch? If you’re not serious, but just saying that cause you’re throwing a temper tantrum and think that you can bring about change that way or think you’re making a point by threatening to withhold your support, I’m not going to validate you. You’re being manipulative and all you’re doing is trying to make other people feel bad.  Anyone else who does this will be blocked.  

Anonymous said:  The new writers are really destroying the series. Eda blamed serkan for not telling her the truth and now she did exactly the same. They're ruining eda's character by doing that. Eda wouldn’t have ever, nor left herself be defeated like this by babaanne, nor used the words she did with Serkan, it was beyond mean, and unnecessary for this plot, im so upset

Dude, pull yourself together. It’s not that bad. The new writers are definitely evolving the series, if feels like it’s going to be more plot driven, than situational, but I think that had to happen if they were going to continue making episodes. Maybe you believe they should just end it, and that’s a fine opinion to have, but if it’s to continue, and I personally want it to, there needs to be a plot, there needs to be a big obstacle and this is what these writers’ have chosen.   

Out of all the thing they could have done, it’s actually a good direction to go. Once again, they’ve chosen to separate them, not because one betrayed the other. Not because of some third-party love interest. Not because one is uncertain about their feelings. Not because one of them made a bad choice that hurt the other. They’re separated because of something that happened when they were children, something completely out of their control.  And Eda made the decision she did, because she loves him more than anything. 

For drama in a romantic story its about as good as you can hope for. Because despite your knee-jerk, overly emotional take, the reality is there is nothing here that taints either character or their love for one another. 

They are NOT ruining Eda’s character.  Eda was pushed into a corner and she made a hasty decision to save the man she loves. Babaanne was watching her constantly, she was having her followed. Eda did what was necessary to get Serkan out of jail and then to stop Babaanne’s relentless, and successful, attacks against him.  She said what she said, because that’s the only thing that would have convinced him she was for real. Anything else he wouldn’t have believed, and if he didn’t believe it then Babaanne wouldn’t have stopped. Also, Eda hasn’t let herself be defeated. She did what she needed to do, so she can keep Serkan safe while she fights. This is just one battle, Babaanne won’t win the war. 

They’ll get to the point when they’re fighting her together, but we’re getting this part first. The part that will give both of them greater insight into the other, and the perspective they both need to truly understand how each felt during the first break up. And it will give us angst and longing and pining and jealousy and all sorts of things. 

Also, curious, why is it okay for Serkan to break her heart because he was afraid of her reaction to the truth of the past, but it’s not okay for Eda to break his heart to save him from huge and real threats to his safety, livelihood, freedom and family?

Anonymous said: I am so sad for serkan he doesn't deserve this. Eda ended up abandoning him like everyone else who comes into his life. The worst thing about it is that he knew it was going to happen and he was afraid it would happen and it did happen 😭

It’s definitely gut-wrenching. Serkan doesn’t deserve this, but neither did Eda. And Eda didn’t abandon him because she wanted to, she did it because very bad things were happening and she had to act quickly.

However, think about what you just said: he knew it was going to happen. It’s also not like the consequences of going against Babaanne are unknown to him.  He knows he was thrown in jail, he knows his dad is in jail, he knows there were serious threats to his business. So what that means is that it won’t take Serkan long to figure out that Babaanne is behind everything and Eda is 100% acting out of love for him.  

He will just need to shake off the sting of her words, and the haze of heartbreak and he’ll see that she did it for him. 

[flightfoot]

Scarlet Fever Analysis 2: Salt Fighting

AO3

Note: this contains spoilers for all of Scarlet Fever

Scarlet Fever addresses and shuts down salt in many ways, showing where it might have a point, but fighting back when that point is taken too far.

This is usually done through two particular mouthpieces - Master Fu and Princess Justice, though other characters do bring up salt arguments and scenarios as well.

Master Fu’s main problems stem from not trusting Adrien enough, from having so little faith in him, treating him like an afterthought, a sidekick. He largely represents the Adrien salters who think he’s incompetent and unworthy of attention, that he’s useless without Ladybug and only exists to be her bodyguard - and that since that’s his role, he deserves no accolades for fulfilling it.

From the beginning, Master Fu has some misgivings about Adrien being Paris’s main protector, without Marinette around to help.

Tikki floated forward to respond but Master Fu held out his palm to stop her. "The last time you used the Ladybug Miraculous you had her help!"

Adrien looked down. "I know... That's why we need her back." He looked up in determination as he put on the earrings. "If I had so much trouble with them then we can't just choose anyone else and we can't wait." (Chapter 2)

Master Fu is doubtful here that Adrien’s up to the task, since he wasn’t quite up to it last time. Which… fair. Adrien struggled in Reflekdoll, with Marinette ultimately telling him how to use his Lucky Charm.

But Adrien’s counterargument is also important. It shifts the conversation from the implication that “Adrien is incompetent as Ladybug” to “Marinette is the best at being Ladybug, but failing that, Adrien is the second best choice since he has some experience as Ladybug and a lot as a Miraculous Wielder more generally”.

Credit to Master Fu, he doesn’t argue with Adrien on this front, doesn’t try to stop him. Adrien IS the best option available to wield the Ladybug Miraculous.

There’s some salt about Adrien being dumb and unable to use the Ladybug effectively, but Scarlet Fever shuts that down. Yes, it’s not as natural a fit for Adrien as it is for Marinette, but that’s because of how uniquely suited Marinette is for the Ladybug, not because Adrien is especially bad at using it - and when push comes to shove, he can use it very effectively.

That’s only the beginning of Master Fu’s doubt in Adrien and skepticism of his choices, however. He isn’t especially happy when Adrien brings Sabine back to their base.

"He also said you were the one to ask about Marinette," Sabine continued.

Master Fu stumbled in shock and turned his head from Sabine to Adrien and back again. "The situation is... complicated."

"She deserves to know, Master," Adrien insisted, he'd wrapped the tarp around himself like a shawl, revealing his eyes but keeping his face covered.

"It is not the time!" Master Fu chastised. "With Papillon Écarlate gaining strength we must focus on- Are you listening to me?" (Chapter 3)

This passage parallels one of the arguments about Syren, one of the conflicts. In that episode, there was an undertone of Adrien having the right to know some of the Miraculous-related stuff, enough to know what was going on with Ladybug at least, and Fu delaying because it supposedly wasn’t the right time. It’s fitting to see that argument rear up again, especially since Adrien’s “right to know” stuff comes up so often, with how he’s left out of the loop so much and how that hurts.

Fu’s resistant to trusting Adrien’s instincts in general, not even wanting to let him decide who to give a Miraculous to, wanting to wait until Ladybug’s freed so SHE can decide. It takes an outside authority - the Lucky Charm - to persuade Fu, rather than having some faith in Adrien’s choices.

"We can still free Ladybug," Master Fu insisted. "Then she can decide who to bestow with a Miraculous."

Adrien shook his head. "My Lucky Charm said I needed Kagami."

"... The Lucky Charm said to give Kagami the Black Cat?"

"... Yes! I don't know if it's to bring My Lady back to us or some other reason but I know that we need Kagami! And I know I need to hurry!"

Master Fu stared at his Chosen intently. "If that is our best course of action," he conceded. (Chapter 3)

The complete reliance on Marinette to fulfill the auxiliary duties of a Miraculous Wielder, the unwillingness to consider that Adrien may also be able to perform some of the same roles well, like choosing wielders, is something I’ve seen crop up in salt repeatedly.

It comes to a head with Sabine and Fu arguing, Fu claiming that Adrien isn’t good enough while Sabine counters, defending Adrien.

"I had to train Marinette! I could not stop simply to scold Chat Noir every time he erred! Adrien has made too many mistakes!"

"Isn't it a teacher's job to correct his students? Maybe you should have trained Adrien too instead of expecting my daughter to do everything herself!" Sabine challenged.

"It was too dangerous!" Master Fu retorted. "Marinette proved herself! I couldn't let Adrien in when he did not earn it!

Sabine stared at this man older than her father and realized he knew nothing of adolescents. "... Trading his wellbeing for my daughter's may not make him trustworthy in your eyes," she stressed. "But it does in mine." (Chapter 6)

One of the salt arguments I’ve heard is that Adrien hasn’t “proven” himself worthy of having more information, more of a role in the process, of having the same sort of information and authority as Marinette. Him just fulfilling his role as a superhero, protecting Paris and protecting Ladybug so she can restore everything, even at the cost of his own life, isn’t seen as enough (and is sometimes even seen as him manipulating her somehow).

But Sabine’s the voice of reason, fighting back. She doesn’t have the same sort of unreasonable, unmanageable expectations that Fu does - if she did Marinette would probably be joining Adrien in the “awful parent” club.

Instead, she holds Adrien to the same sort of standard that she would Marinette. He’s trying to help, has sacrificed himself again and again for Marinette’s sake, for Paris’s sake. He is a Hero of Paris. That’s all he needs to be. He’s more than proved his trustworthiness, shown that he should be given the same sort of respect that Marinette gets.

Princess Justice is not so easily reasoned with.

She represents a specific character in saltfics, the most important one by design - the one the world’s warped around.

Saltinette.

It’s pretty apparent in her accusations against the heroes, in the accusations against others more generally.

"What of Papillon's Judgment!" Maneki-neko demanded as they sped towards the Seine. She held tight to the struggling villain as she attempted to get through to Marinette. "Will you absolve him of his crimes against Paris! Against your friends!"

"What friends!?" Princess Justice roared. She opened her bag and spun. The dust engulfed them, entering Kagami's eyes and distracting her long enough for the villain to break free.

Princess Justice struck at the hero, Maneki-neko barely deflecting her attacks. Every sentence punctuated by the crack of her whip. "They abandoned me! They chose that liar over me! They will all suffer like I have! They will all feel my pain! Every! Last! ONE!" (Chapter 5)

Saltfics frequently exaggerate the “sins” of Marinette’s friends and family, from merely having some doubt in her (based on both accusations and actual evidence, albeit planted evidence) into actively shunning her - something that doesn’t happen in the show for more than a few minutes at best, and which Alya doesn’t even entertain.

But the part that’s most telling? Her desire to inflict pain on them in return. Not merely to persuade them that Lila’s wrong, but to actively want them to suffer for the impertinence of being conned.

The revenge plot is a staple of saltfics, often focusing on punishing the people Lila fooled even above punishing Lila. On inflicting pain on the people who “failed” Marinette when they should have believed her and followed what she said unquestioningly, no matter what evidence or accusations were thrown her way, without a hint of doubt or consideration for Lila’s words.

Marinette notably does NOT do this. Even in Silencer she wants justice because of Bob stealing her design and Kitty Section’s music, but emphatically does NOT pursue revenge, trying to get Silencer to back down because anything he did to Bob WOULD be vengeance, not justice. She even tells Chat as much when he suggests letting Silencer MAKE Bob confess the truth.

If she isn’t willing to let that happen to Bob, someone who did indeed knowingly wrong her and her friends without remorse, she CERTAINLY wouldn’t want to inflict vengeance on people whose main crime was being tricked, something that Mister Bug calls Princess Justice out on.

"You've always been forgiving!" Mister Bug reminded her desperately. "Always the one to point out what's unjust! You said that we should strive for Justice not Revenge! This! All of this! Is Revenge!" (Chapter 5)

Of course, she isn’t exactly in a headspace where she’s able to listen to him.

Instead she fights him, accusing him of common salt complaints against him.

"Chat Noir!" She slammed them into the side of a building, gratified to hear his cries. "You are accused!"

Adrien felt his heart pounding in fear. He knew what the verdict would be.

"Accused of being Unworthy!"

"Plagg disagrees." The throbbing impact of the bench on his head hurt less than the impact of her words on his heart. (Chapter 5)

Adrien frequently has the Black Cat Miraculous taken from him in saltfics for one reason or another, declared unworthy of possessing it. Canonically of course none of the heroes would even consider that (except Adrien himself, funnily enough), and the one whose opinion on his “worthiness” matters most - Plagg - has declared Adrien to be the best Chat Noir he ever had, both thinking he’s a good hero AND also caring about him deeply, helping to cheer him up whenever Adrien’s hurt.

"Accused of holding Ladybug back!" She ground him on the underside of a bridge as they flew past.

His chest tightened and he forced air into his lungs. The friction of stones on his back burned less than her barbs. "First I've heard of it." (Chapter 5)

Chat Noir’s also accused of being useless a lot, of Ladybug being better off without him. Something that has been shown to not be the case time and time again. Furthermore she’d never WANT to be without him - that was shown in the NY special. That she didn’t know she could even fight without him by her side.

"Accused of treating the lives of Paris like some game!"

His eyes widened. "Never!" (Chapter 5)

This salt mostly stems from Syren, though it crops up more generally with Chat Noir cracking jokes during akuma battles. But while he jokes or gets upset, it never distracts him from fighting the akuma for long, if at all. Plus, it’s a way of coping with the situation. Getting too bogged down and not having any fun along the way can lead to MORE mistakes, as Gamer 2.0 demonstrated.

"Accused of getting in her way! Of always expecting her to save you without regard for how getting brainwashed affects her!" She ricocheted between two trees before she had to evade his companions.

"I was protecting you!" He jerked them away from the lamppost she was about to crush his back against. "You think I want to fight you!? I hate being brainwashed! I'm terrified of it!" (Chapter 5)

Yep, this is, for some reason, an actual salt accusation towards Chat to show how he’s a horrible person: that he gets hurt and brainwashed for her sake too often and doesn’t think about how she feels about needing to save him, making him a horrible person.

"I had to ask you to help me before you did anything!" Princess Justice launched herself at him with a kick.

"... What?" Mister Bug was snapped out of his thoughts by her words. He grabbed her foot and used her momentum to spin her away, head over heel.

She righted herself, the butterfly mark flaring back up, and charged again. "Right before Damocles expelled me, you said nothing until I asked you to!"

He used his forearms to block her strikes as a familiar rage started burning through his veins. "You're... angry because I helped you? When you asked for it!?" He ducked under her blow and brought his fist into an uppercut.

"I shouldn't have to ask!" She barely twisted out of the way in time as she failed in her attempt to knee him in the face. "You are Unworthy!" Princess Justice accused. (Chapter 9)

Yep, this is an actual accusation that’s thrown at Adrien for the events of “Ladybug”; that after Marinette opens the locker and Lila’s necklace falls out, he processes for a few seconds and intervenes once Marinette asks him for help. It takes 15 seconds from the time Lila picks the necklace up to Adrien intervening (with most of that time taken up by Marinette talking), but a quarter of a minute is an unforgivable delay for salters.

As for not helping until she asked for it (though Adrien didn’t have much of a window in which to intervene before she requested assistance)... that’s not always a bad thing. It’s not what MARINETTE does, but that doesn’t always work out. Often it IS a good idea to wait until someone gives an indication that they want the help before intervening, because that intervention may end up only making things worse. Adrien knows that well enough when it comes to his father - Nino wasn’t able to persuade him to allow Adrien to have a birthday party, and was subsequently barred from the house as a “bad influence”. Worse may have happened if he pushed further, ESPECIALLY to Adrien, whom Gabriel has authority to punish.

Adrien can only take so much of this, so much of being slandered, of having every potential fault magnified a thousandfold while his own feelings and views of the situations are completely disregarded before he SNAPS.

"I was betrayed!" She swung a right hook at him. "My whole world crashed down around me!" And a left. "Who are you to Judge me, oh Chat Blanc!" The villain sneered.

And Mister Bug's control snapped.

"So sorry grieving over my dead mother isn't good enough to get AKUMATIZED OVER!" (Chapter 9)

Marinette has issues that she’s dealing with, emotional turmoil that she’s going through. But so do others, ESPECIALLY Adrien. She’s not the only one whose feelings matter.

“I forgot! Marinette is the only one whose burdens count!" He stopped suddenly and yanked on his yo-yo.

"What would you know about it!?" She copied him and jerked her whip towards her, the tangled cords beginning to pull free.

"They kept touching ME!" His disgust and shame roared through him and their weapons separated with a snap.

"Then you should have said something instead of letting them walk all over you!" She lashed out with her whip, intending to put an end to this. (Chapter 9)

Adrien’s sneered at for being a spineless doormat, for “letting” people touch him when he’s very clearly trying to get away without just outright telling them to back off. It is something that he needs to work on, but it’s certainly not something to BLAME him for. Especially since it’s doubtful that making a fuss about that sort of thing would’ve been well-received in most of his life. His father would be unlikely to take it well if he objected to a photoshoot on those grounds, for instance.

But he’s not the only one who needs to learn when to confess that something bad has happened to them.

"You're one to talk!" He deflected every strike with his yo-yo, mirrored her every move.

"You're the one who told me not to SAY anything!" Her whip came a hairsbreadth from his ear.

"You never said she threatened you!" His yo-yo barely grazed her bag.

"What difference does it make!?" She charged at him.

"It makes all the difference!" He rose to meet her. (Chapter 9)

This is a key point of contention in a lot of the Chameleon salt that’s directed at Adrien. Often he’s blamed for his advice to Marinette not to continue going after Lila, that it won’t help anything. That so long as he and Marinette knew she was lying, it didn’t really matter.

But that advice was based on the premise that Lila wasn’t an active threat, a danger. That it was merely galling to see her lying, but that she wasn’t causing any active harm by doing so. And while it was theorized that her lies about her status may lead to her making false promises to people, causing them to forgo real opportunities in pursuit of a lie, by the end of season 3 that does not appear to be the case.

Her actively threatening Marinette changes things. If she didn’t pose an actual danger, then it would be irritating to have to listen to her lie, but it doesn’t actually change anything. But with her desire to isolate Marinette? That’s different. Just leaving her be under those circumstances leaves Marinette in peril.

But Adrien DID NOT KNOW ABOUT THAT, and that is not his fault. He could only make decisions and recommendations off of information he possesses. He is not to blame for not being psychic.

Marinette would NOT blame Adrien for these things. Would not try to inflict pain on her friends.

Princess Justice is not Marinette.

Saltinette is not Marinette.

Something that Adrien realizes.

Adrien looked at Princess Justice. Really looked at her. The sneer of her lips, the sadistic gleam in her eyes, the ferocity of her advance. This... This was not Marinette.

The anger made way as Adrien's determination and love rose to merge with it. He broke through her assault and zipped away. The villain giving chase.

Princess Justice was all pain and rage and desire.

The villains on the ground took notice of their approach.

But Marinette was not defined by these things.

Glaciator fired a barrage of ice cream as he moved too close.

Marinette was joy and compassion and longing.(Chapter 9)

Marinette can have negative emotions and make bad decisions like anyone else. But fundamentally she is kind and caring, brings light to those around her, makes their lives better. She doesn’t try to make them miserable and beat every ounce of happiness out of their existence. She values people besides herself, besides what they can do for her, and cares about what they think and feel.

And SHE truly cares about justice.

Princess Justice does not deserve the name. Although she declares herself just, serves as judge, jury, and executioner, she does not keep herself to the standard she holds others too.

Kagami's tail stiffened. "Liar!" Maneki-neko let the villain's whip wrap around her staff and yanked her in. "You're a liar!" Her fist connected with the akumatized supervillain.

Throwing her own punch Princess Justice's eyes narrowed. "Justice doesn't lie!"

Stumbling back, Maneki-neko threw herself forward. "You're not Justice!" She tackled the villain, and they went over the edge of the roof. "You're immune to your own dust! You've been lying since the beginning!" (Chapter 12)

It’s poetic really. For the representation of Saltinette to be an evilized Marinette, one who rains down judgement on others but protects herself from being judged similarly, not even realizing that she’s doing it. Saltinette isn’t Marinette. She’s a twisted version, bereft of reason and her best qualities.

If Saltinette was judging herself the way she judges everyone else? She would be even more furious at Marinette for not doing more to take Lila down, since she knows she’s an active threat and is well-positioned to let people know that she’s lying about being her friend, than she is at Adrien. There would probably be a host of other things she’d judge herself for as well, but what exactly would depend on what space Saltinette occupied in that dynamic. For the only thing that matters to Saltinette is whether something or someone benefits her or whether they cause her any difficulty, nothing else.

Indignation. Princess Justice whirled to face him as her blue eyes narrowed. "You'd turn against me, too? Just like everyone else!? You all turned against me!"

Righteous Fury rumbled in displeasure at its master's agitation, exoskeleton glowing faintly under their feet.

"Disagreeing with you doesn't mean I've turned against you, my Lady," Adrien reasoned. (Chapter 13)

This is key. It’s possible to have fics, to have circumstances where Marinette conflicts with Adrien, Alya, or many others, without anyone being treated as being a horrible person. Sometimes people just disagree, sometimes for good reasons, due to perspective, mindset, or differences in knowledge, for instance. It doesn’t always mean they’ve turned against the other person.

Approaching cautiously, Roi Bug kept a hand close to his yo-yo in case she tried to attack him in earnest. "Revenge isn't Justice. You know that. Remember?"

"... I do." She looked down as another building was hit. "I remember letting the Guilty hurt the Innocent! Letting people who have never shown an ounce of remorse get away scot-free! Showing mercy to people who don't deserve it! Who haven't earned it!" Her gaze turned to him with frustration and anger in her eyes. "That is what I remember!"

He let her rage wash past him. "Mercy is never earned. That's why it's Mercy. Because you don't deserve it. Forgiveness-"

Princess Justice laughed. "Oh, forgiveness! You're really good at that, aren't you? But I'm done forgiving! From now on everyone gets exactly. What. They. Deserve!"

Temper flaring, Adrien shot his hand out toward a girl barely younger than them as she floated past. Face frozen mid-scream. Dark glow proclaiming: Self-righteous. "Is this what they deserve!?"

No, yes, no, yes, no- "Silence!" Princess Justice's whip flew at him again. This time Roi Bug whirled his yo-yo as a shield to deflect it. (Chapter 13)

Forgiveness and mercy can go too far. That is true. But there’s a reason they exist, why they’re generally considered good. Punishment can go too far, can cause more harm than good, especially when taken to insane extremes for minor slights, as Princess Justice and Saltinette do. A LOT of Disproportionate Retribution gets thrown around.

And if merely causing someone some strife was worthy of insane punishment? Few people would pass. Marinette among them.

"I've never harmed an Innocent person in my life!" She slashed her whip in a wide arc.

Bringing out the Monkey's staff and the baseball bat Lucky Charm, he used both weapons to deflect her attack. "Of course, you have! You're human aren't you!?"

"They were all Guilty!" She insisted, agitation causing the sentimonster to rumble as she struck. "They all deserved it!"

Adrien's eyes narrowed. "Did Luka 'deserve' it?"

Flinching, her whip missed its target.

"Or Kagami?" He pressed. "Did she 'deserve' the way you treated her?"

Regret, determination, shame.

"She should know what she's done to you," he whispered.

"... She does."

"No- I- Quiet! Be quiet!" She held her head between her hands as a drum pounded in her skull. "Justice! I am Justice!" (Chapter 13)

Marinette’s inflicted pain on others who have not done something to earn it, Kagami being one of the chief examples, what with her actions towards her in Animaestro and Ikari Gozen. But while what Marinette did those times were WRONG, they do not define her as a person, and do not justify an insane level of disproportionate retribution against her, do not justify writing Marinette off as a human being.

That same courtesy should apply to others as well.

Marinette is different from Princess Justice, from Saltinette, something she aptly demonstrates when she talks to Adrien after being deakumatized.

I-I said some... terrible things to you and I..." Marinette curled her arms around herself. "I didn't mean it." (Chapter 14)

Marinette also fights back against the accusations Princess Justice made, things that Marinette didn’t mean, does not believe, and would never say if she’d been herself.

"You saved me countless times!" His eyes watered as her's did the same. "You saved Paris countless times!" Yellow smoke intruded into his thoughts, helpless to stop the cycle no matter how many Second Chances he got. "It-" Shame choked his throat and he swallowed it back, averting his eyes. "It's about time I started pulling my weight..."

Frowning, Marinette placed her hands over his. "Who... said you weren't pulling your weight?" His silence was answer enough and the guilt cut at her.

Piecing Adrien and Chat Noir together was surprisingly easy when she let herself consider it. Virtues and flaws that made a terrible sort of sense together. Once Marinette understood that he felt just as alone as she did. And Princess Justice threw it all in his face.

"Well, she was wrong!" Marinette snapped. Gripping Adrien's hands firmly as they trembled. (Chapter 14)

Marinette would never say that Chat wasn’t pulling his weight, that he wasn’t good enough. Wouldn’t believe it and would fight back against anyone who hurt her partner that way. She reassures him that he is enough, that he did well, even while he assures her that he doesn’t blame her for what happened and nor would anyone else. That she’s human, and having a moment of emotional weakness, of distress, does not make her bad or unworthy or irresponsible.

Both of them reassuring each other that they don’t need to be perfect. That they are enough. To be kind and forgiving towards themselves.

[love-sapphirerose]

Yashahime: Princess Half-Demon Episode 24

https://www.animenewsnetwork.com/review/yashahime-princess-half-demon/episode-24/.170860

Look, there was never even the slightest chance that Yashahime's 24th episode would end up functioning as a proper series finale. I knew that. You knew that. We all knew that. Over the last six months, Yashahime has rambled, meandered, bungled, and straight tumbled ass-over-elbows in its vain attempts at telling a coherent and engaging story, but never has it managed to establish so much plot and character motivation that anyone would mistakenly think that it would be a one-and-done. I was a fool for ever dreaming of a world where Yashahime might have the decency to end here and now. Still, you can't blame a guy for hoping right?

Except, we've also learned what happens to hope when Yashahime comes calling, haven't we?

In a certain sense, you'd think a part of me would be happy to find out that “Sesshomaru's Daughter” was never meant to function as a complete conclusion to this story, because that could only mean that this season finale has less responsibilities to juggle, in the long run. In spite of every attempt on Yashahime's part to sabotage itself, that last couple of episodes managed to lay the groundwork for something that at least kind of resembles a conflict for this final chapter of the season: Zero has been revived by Sesshomaru's Tenseiga, and now she's got some Rainbow Pearl-fueled demonic wrath to bring down on our heroines; Kirinmaru has also descended from the sky to do…something, which can only mean double trouble for the girls!

Haha, no. That would be far too reasonable a direction to take the story, so instead Yashahime decides to spit right in its audience's face with more of The Usual Yashahime Bullshit™, starting mere seconds after Sesshomaru revives Zero with the Tenseiga. For some reason, Sesshomaru reveals that he is no longer concerned about her mortal link with Rin, and vows to do…something to her that involves a thorough stabbing. The logical assumption is that he wants to kill her, but that makes a negative amount of sense given that she was literally just dead, so I'm just going to pretend that Yashahime is trying to trick us, and that Sesshomaru's plans are more complicated than that. Is there even a scrap of proof to that effect? Hell no, but we're only a couple of minutes into this thing, and our collective sanity can only withstand so much of this malarkey.

Meanwhile, in Spooky Tree World: Jaken notices that Rin is crying. Later on, he manages to hitch a ride with Totosai and his cow thing, claiming that he needs to fix Rin's sadness. How does he plan on doing this? What purpose does this mission serve? I sure as hell don't know, and it never comes up again. Next scene.

Before Zero has the chance to do a single thing with her twice-recovered Rainbow Pearls, Kirinmaru lashes out and magically poofs them out across the corners of the land. Yes, after spending an entire season building up the Rainbow Pearls as the ultimate artifacts of unlimited power or whatever, they served no purpose whatsoever before the script re-scattered them like the knockoff Shikon Jewels they've always been. The most reaction that anyone musters is when Moroha says, "Oh damn. There they go." Cool, show. Cool.

As for Zero? She disowns her brother and then magically yeets herself away by thwipping her spider-web onto the thin air. Then, Riku stabs Kirinmaru, which does absolutely nothing, before he flicks his little earring and poofs away too. Then , Sesshomaru goes after Zero and explains that Kirinmaru should fight his daughters as a “rite of courage and cowardice.” He then also just zips off into the sky. No, we never see Zero or Riku again. Their entire involvement in this scheme was – you guessed it – absolutely pointless!

Around this point in the episode is where you might be asking: “Wait a minute. Why does Kirinmaru tell the girls he would have let them run away if they asked? Why does he seem concerned over Sesshomaru abandoning his children? Why did he turn on his sister; does he still want to kill the girls because of that one prophecy about getting murdered by a half-demon? What does any of this have to do with the big evil comet that is going to strike the Earth in the future?” Oh, you sweet summer child. Yashahime doesn't give a shit about your questions! And no, before you even think about it again, the future comet and the Mr. Kirin subplot are not ever mentioned again, either.

With all of that out of the way, the only thing left is the big showdown between Kirinmaru and the three girls, all of whom decide to stay and fight the guy who has already handily kicked their asses without so much as breaking a sweat because…they think he's lying about being strong? And Setsuna doesn't want to back down from the rite of passage she only just learned about thirty seconds beforehand? Sure. Fine. Let's go with that. Who cares?

Now, I do want to say at least one nice thing about this episode. Even though most of the episode looks embarrassingly sloppy and rushed, the visuals really turn themselves around for this last fight, especially right at the beginning. Each of the three girls gets a delightfully-animated action cut to show off their moves, and kudos to the artists in charge of those sequences. If anything, the sequence might look a little too good, as it clashes mightily with the butt-ugly visuals that the show usually sports and serves as a bittersweet reminder of the series that Yashahime could have been.

There. That was technically a compliment, right? I hope so, because the pretty visuals can't save the back-half of "Sesshomaru's Daughter" from being almost awe-inspiring in its lameness. For one, fricking Moroha just gets whooshed out of the fight after landing maybe one or two hits. Again. Then, in order to deprive us of even the barest shred of dramatic tension, Kirinmaru loudly announces that he is going to threaten Setsuna's life in order to draw out Towa's latent power. Unsurprisingly, this leads to him murdering the hell out of Setsuna after she nicks his cheek with that Blood Blade of hers. Or rather, he slashes her from her heels to her head with his magic blade thingy, and then she falls down perfectly intact, and slowly slips away into her first “sleep” in years. Do you get it? Because Dream Butterfly.

One final almost-good thing happens when Moroha comes back with her Beniyasha face on, and she finally gets to help Towa land a major blow against Kirinmaru (it sure is a good thing that nobody ever pointlessly sacrificed their life to try and teach Moroha about the dangers of using her incredibly useful Beniyasha powers, right?). For her part, the raged-out Towa gets her own demony glow-up, and she ends up looking like a little silver-haired Super Saiyan 3 (Super Sesshy 3?). Two giant super-power blasts later, and…a slightly winded Kirinmaru admits his respect for Towa, and then flies away of his own volition. Then Sesshomaru comes back from wherever he was and offers his broken Tenseiga to Towa to help bring Setsuna back to life, finally winning that Father of the Year award he has been vying for all this time.

That's it. No, seriously, that's the end of the season. No mention of Kagome or Inuyasha whatsoever, no clues as to what any of the villains' true motivations are; we don't even get a proper explanation for whatever the hell an “Aruku's Pinwheel” is! Instead, Yashahime's first season ended as we all should have expected it would: As a slow-motion train wreck of gobsmackingly stupid writing, lame action, and a veritable mountain of wasted potential. So sure, maybe some of the series' gravest failings can get ironed out in another year or two. Lord knows that I would be ecstatic to learn that future iterations of this show ended up being halfway decent.

However, that would never change the fact that this first season was one of the most exhausting, frustrating, and disappointing anime that I've ever seen. So, with no small amount of relief, I bid adieu to our three half-demon princesses. I wish I could say that I'll miss you, but I most definitely will not. Except maybe for Moroha, who always has and always will deserve better than Yashahime. For the rest of the knuckleheads that have been leeching away at our time and our patience these last six months, there is only one rating they could ever deserve...

[lailarain]

WARNING: SPOILERS FOR DANGANRONPA 3

This is a continuation of this post.

I'm watching Danganronpa 3: The End of Hope's Peak High School Future Arc for the first time.

Episode 6:

Makoto, you fucking genius. Then again, can't Monokuma just make that a new rule if he wants to🤨

LMAO MONACA THINKING SHE WAS CAUGHT🤣🤣🤣

BYAKUYA! I missed u🥰

WAIT WHY THE FUCK IS HE BRITISH ALL OF A SUDDEN💀

Wait Geko Gahara is what now😀

KOMARU AND TOKO YES I MISSED YOUUUU

YES OUR FAVORITE ULTRA DESPAIR LESBIANS ARE BACK AT IT AGAIN😎😎😎😎

HAJIME YES MY NON-SHAPE-KNOWING BRO

Wait....Izuru🤨?

Episode 7:

Monaca, Junko killed HERSELF. Makoto didn't do shit🤨

THE TITLE IS ULTRA DESPAIR GIRLS YEAH BABY

THE WARRIORS OF HOPE ARE ALIVE AND HELPING OUT THE UDGs YES

It's so nostalgic to watch my favorite dynamic duo fight monokumas with the megaphone again🥺🥺🥺

The way she says "neutralizing demonic teddy bears" like it's normal😭

"Unless you like it rough😏"

Okay wtf is up with Toko's voice

Toko's fantasies are WAY more awkward when animated. Whatever they pay Byakuya's VA clearly isn't enough

IS THAT ACTUALLY HOW SHE SEES KOMARU LMAOOOO

BYAKUYA SENSED HER BEING WEIRD LMAOOO

Can Monaca just stfu🙄

HOLY FUCK YES THE LESBIANS ARE HOLDING HANDS I REPEAT THE LESBIANS ARE HOLDING HANDS

"Don't you see? I was HOPEING to defeat you. I R O N Y."

YES NAGITO

"Leave me alone. G O O G L E I T."

Who's gonna tell Monaca that she'll automatically suffocate the moment she breaks the atmosphere?

Istg those two are SO gay for each other

Komaru and Makoto are such wholesome siblings😭

KYOKO BETTER NOT BE THE ONE TO DIE I SWEAR I-

Episode 8:

Wait did he just say the name I think he said😀

I don't even know what to say about this episode title💀

NO MAKOTO SWEETIE IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT😭

Yo why tf does the blonde bitch look like that🤨

NO THAT MOTHER EFFER BETTER GET AWAY FROM KYOKO😤

Did that peach-haired asshole just-

HOLY FUCK POTHEAD GUY NO

POTHEAD GUY KNEW KYOKO AND HER DAD

What the fuck was in that chocolate😀

The bitch killed the love of her life? That's fucked up, man.

Kyoko, we're in a pandemic. Don't lick saliva, he could've had COVID🙄

Kyoko tricked them? Man, what a badass.

Episode 9:

Wait, so if that wasn't an actual exit, does that mean she killed her love for no reason?

The building is underwater? This game keeps on coming up with insane scenarios, I swear

Okay, blonde bitch has officially LOST HIS MARBLES.

Makoto please don't blame yourself🥺🥺🥺

DID THIS BLONDE BITCH JUST-

Wait....SO SHE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO KILL HIM?

AND HE STILL KISSED HER WTF

Aoi and Makoto's friendship is so cute🥰

Kyoko's gonna die, isn't she?😟

KYOKO NO SHE SACRIFICED HERSELF KNOWING SHE WAS GONNA DIE AGGGGGGGHHHHHHH

BLONDE BITCH SHUT THE FUCK UP HE JUST LOST KYOKO THIS ISN'T ABOUT HOPE

(No joke I am genuinely about to cry now. She better not be dead)

Episode 10:

Awwww I remember this is when she rescued him🥺

Kyoko really is with Atua now😔😇

"She died protecting me from myself" that line HURT, man

Awww poor Makoto is crying🥺🥺

Blonde bitch looking like he be POSSESSED or some shit

Wait what's that on Kyoko's body

how DARE this blonde ass motherfucker make Makoto bleed. Breathing the same oxygen as him was rude enough🙄

Bullying a girl Makoto? Not cool, Hajime Blonde Bitch

IT HIT HIM IN THE BACK OF THE NECK LMAOOO

Did he.....is Makoto....

Ohhhh He's keeping Makoto alive because he'll be trapped. For a second, I thought this was a redemption arc lol😂

Istg this guy is SO aggressive for no reason🙄✋

THE FACT THAT MAKOTO ISN'T ATTACKING YOU AND TRYING TO TALK IT OUT WHILE YOU BEAT HIM UP IS LITERAL PROOF THAT HE IS ON THE SIDE OF HOPE YOU FUCKING DUMBASS🤦‍♀️

WAIT SO EVERYBODY IS AN ATTACKER!?!?

Okay that's it this blonde bitch and me bouta throw hands for punching Naegi👊

Okay I know this scene is sentimental and all but how the fuck is Naegi still standing😀

Okay I wasn't expecting blonde bitch to cry this is actually pretty sad

WAIT SO WHO'S THE ATTACKER?!?!?

Episode 11:

I was wondering how they reacted to the outside world so this is cool

Wait why is ponytail girl smiling evilly😀

Suicide? Idk sounds unlikely to me🤔

Makoto is such a marder it's actually insane

MAKOTO PLEASE DON'T DIE PLEASE DON'T DIE PLEASE DON'T DIE PLEASE DON'T DIE PLEASE DON'T DIE PLEASE DON'T DIE PLEASE DON'T DIE

Okay who in the literal fuck is the attacker tho

What the fuck is that video and where is Makoto I'm so confused rn

ARE THOSE THE VICTIMS?!?!?

WAIT WHAT'S HAPPENING TO MAKOTO WAS HE TRIGGERED WHAT'S GOING ON

NAEGI HOLY FUCK DON'T DO IT

WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIS EYES HE LOOKS LIKE NAGITO WHEN HE'S RANTING ABOUT HOPE WHAT THE FUCK

BUFF GUY IS ALIVE HOLY SHITBALLS

WAIT SO IT REALLY WAS SUICIDE?!?!?

NO BUFF DUDE DON'T GIVE IN TO DESPAIR STAY ALIVE

YES BUFF DUDE STAY ALIVE AND SAVE THEM DONT DIE

YES BLONDE BITCH GO SAFE YOUR BRO AND TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL

NOOOOOOOOOO BUFF BROOOOOOOO

Wait IS TENGAN ALIVE?!?!?!?

(sorry about all the capitals)

Episode 12:

FINAL EPISODE BABY LET'S GO

Wait so is the video that forced the reserve course students to commit suicide and the one that made Makoto go batshit crazy one in the same?

Heh heh spiral eyes go brrr

Shy guy why are you freaking out what did you do

"You need to know the truth. I've liked anime for as long as I can remember" wow what a shock that the ultimate animator likes animation😀

"You're the exception to the rule and you damn well know it" damn shy guy

wait shy guy what are you doing

SHY GUY NO-

WAIT HE COULDN'T USE HIS TALENT

Did he just say eliminate😀

Shy guy what in the ever-loving fuck are you doing

BLONDE BITCH YES

Okay this is such an elaborate plot twist wtf

AWWW BLONDE BITCH🥺🥺🥺🥺

ASAHINA NO

SHY GUY DON'T YOU DARE PRESS YES

Thank god there's a timer😅

TOKO KOMARU NOOOOOO

WAIT MONACA TOO? SHE'S ALIVE!?!?!?!?

This isn't looking too good for Makoto and Blonde Bitch

WAIT JUNKO IS ALIVE?!?!?!?!?!

JUNKO CALLED OLD GUY OLD AND CRUSTY LMAOOO

Why do I like Junko so much

"Get over it, slut. We're dead😋"

WAIT THAT'S IT!??!?! IT'S OVER?!?!? WHAT HAPPENED?

Am I supposed to watch Despair Arc Now?

Okay I think it's over.

Next, it's time for the only reason I decided to watch the anime: to watch the despair arc for more NAGITO.

[noethicalconsumptionunderdisney]

Hogwarts Sorting Profile: Alex Russo

Alex Russo is the quintessential Disney Channel Anti-Heroine of my generation, and a fascinating character to look into, so who better to start this series?  Here I’ll be using the SortingHatChats system so I can really dive deep into how characters think and act.

I’m gonna start with Alex’s Secondary for this one, because it’s the easiest to argue for, it’s something she wears on her sleeve very proudly, and something a lot of viewers pick up on pretty easily.  Alex Russo is a Slytherin Secondary par excellence.  

It’s not so much the fact that she’s good at talking circles around people, manipulating them, and “winging it” in general, it’s the fact that she revels in it.  She’s in her element when she does it, and you can tell she’s a natural at it.  For a few brief examples, she tricks the dragon-seller into taking the wrong case in “Curb Your Dragon,” she talks her dad into letting her learn to fly the magic carpet, and she convinces Justin to let her be an understudy in the school play by twisting him taking their dad’s advice into “Dad’s making all your decisions for you,” and that’s just in the first few seasons.

But Alex doesn’t see herself as duplicitous or immoral for this.  When Brad, another Slytherin Secondary, might get to go to the World Summit instead of him, Justin calls Brad a kiss-up and a schmoozer, but Alex sees it a little differently:

“He’s not a kiss-up, he’s just good at getting what he wants.  That’s one of the things we have in common.”

For her, it’s about knowing what you want and knowing how to get it, nothing more and nothing less.  Saying whatever you have to say is just what you do.

Another, big way this manifests is a preference for improvisation over preparation, specifically when it comes to magic.  Knowing the right spells certainly helps, but Alex doesn’t see the value in reading or studying, often preferring to throw herself into a situation and use whatever spell she can think of to get out of it.  When she thinks Uncle Kelbo is offering to be her teacher, she jumps at the opportunity, and when her dad is upset, they have the following exchange:

“Dad’s great with Justin and Max, but I don’t think I’m reaching my full potential with him.”

“Well!  I don’t wanna stand in the way of your full potential.  Maybe Kelbo should teach you!  Maybe you’ll actually show up on time for his lessons!”

“I will, Dad, because you know what I was thinking, is that I learn more by doing than I do by learning!”

Of course, Kelbo doesn’t want to do it, and Jerry is a better wizard than him, but I don’t think Alex was wrong for wanting to try a new approach.  After all, in The Finale, she takes all the points in the round dedicated to solutions to situations she’s had to get out of, and she’s the one who ultimately thinks of a way to defeat the griffin when they are thrown into a bad situation to save Harper and Zeke earlier in the episode (more on that later).  “Not thinking” works for her— that is, thinking on her feet rather than thinking ahead.  Alex isn’t about to waste her time untangling a complex knot, when cutting it will achieve the same result.

So anyone whose single-house sorting for her is Slytherin, I understand.  She’s definitely adaptable enough, and certainly cunning enough, to qualify for it. 

However.

Alex Russo is NOT a Slytherin Primary, and I will fight you on this.

Sure, she is definitely self-serving a lot of the time, and has loyalty to her loved ones in spades as well.  In many lower-stakes situations, you can see her taking the “easy way out” instead of doing the responsible thing, and she certainly has little use for rules a lot of the time.  But in high-stakes situations, she sacrifices her own well-being with very little thought to what consequences she’ll have to face later… or even when she knows she’ll be punished.  Hell, sometimes her schemes go so terribly wrong that after finally setting them right, she’s relieved when she gets a scolding, grateful that the balance has been restored… and that the world is just again.

(Now, I personally don’t believe the Wizards of Waverly Place world is a particularly just one, but Alex trusts the world she lives in more than I do, so I’ll save my own thoughts and feelings about that for another post.)

Not only is she not a Slytherin Primary, she has a fundamental issue with people doing “good” because they’re expecting a reward for it.  Good is something you do for its own sake, not because there’s a ribbon waiting for you on the other side.  The speech she gives the Happy Helpers in “Alex Does Good” says it all, really:

“You guys think you’re helping the community, but you’re hardly doing anything.  And you do it for selfish reasons.  Now, I know I can be a little selfish too because I don’t help a lot of people.  But I know when I do.  I do more than this, and I don’t expect anything in return.  I don’t even do it to make myself feel better.  I do it to make the other person feel better.”

So where does this selfless streak come from?  For Maggie in that episode, or her friends, her family, or love interest, you could still argue there’s a Slytherin loyalty at play.  But many instances of her saving the world contradict this.  In “Wizards Unleashed/Alex Saves Mason,” she tells Justin, within earshot of the country wizards, that there’s nothing she won’t sacrifice for Mason… but it’s a ruse.  She doesn’t sacrifice her family’s portal; instead, she finds a way to bring Mason back without sacrificing anything, her cunning Slytherin Secondary coming in handy once again.

We see another, even clearer example of the same phenomenon in “The Good, The Bad, And The Alex.”  I have a lot of issues with this episode, as I’ve expressed previously and will probably express in the future, but it does, IMO, firmly establish Alex Russo as an Idealist at heart, cutting off a close friend when she “realizes she’s evil” in a way that is literally ice-cold. (And no, I do not apologize for that pun.  Lbr, if y’all are watching Disney Channel, you’ve heard worse.)

Which leads us away from the question of what Alex isn’t, and back to what she is.  I would argue that while self-preservation and self-interest are not necessarily the core of her morality system, her morality is based from her inner self: her thoughts, feelings, and moral impulses.  Deep down, often buried intentionally under a “devil-may-care” persona, Alex is a Gryffindor Primary who believes that when the world needs her to, she has an obligation to do the right thing no matter what the cost.

“Alex Tells The World” is the perfect example of this.  She’s led to believe that the government has captured countless wizards, and she is told to lie low and do nothing by her family.  But this bothers her too much, and unable to leave the fate of the wizard world to chance, she defies the rules and the people around her and exposes magic, believing it’s the only way to save everyone.  

Her Gryffindor Primary is far from unblemished or naïve— she often doubts herself, internalizes the criticism from those around her, or believes that other people are better examples than herself of “The Right Kind Of Person To Be” (namely, Justin).  Why not consider her Burned then?  

The thing with Burned Primaries is they tend to act differently, change their behavior based on those doubts.   Alex doesn’t.  So while she may be a little charred, possibly teetering on the edge of burning at times, she never quite does it, because she still goes with her gut when the chips are down, even if she’s a bit more hesitant than some of her counterparts.  

And while Justin may often try to convince Alex to follow the rules, there’s also been plenty of instances where Alex is the one trying to convince Justin to do what’s right — the Rosie arc, The Movie when he forgets her, The Finale when their friends are in danger — and all self-doubt and comparisons aside, she’s still not afraid to disagree with him when she knows in her heart what’s right and she wants him to do it.  He may be someone she looks up to, looks to for guidance oftentimes, but he’s not the basis of her morality— that still comes down to her.

One last thing I want to touch on: Alex has a saving-people thing.

Now, a lot of the time the thing Alex is saving people from is something she caused in the first place. But I’m not getting into that because we’d be here all day.  Thing is, though, even when it’s not something she was responsible for, she still feels a moral obligation to set things right.  

When Jenny Majorheely begs her to help undo a curse TJ caused in “Art Teacher,” Alex isn’t even supposed to let her know magic exists, and yet she still dumps “undo” dust onto her just in case her story is true (which, of course, it is, leaving her without an art teacher and causing the conflict for the rest of the episode).

When Alex has done everything she can in “Wizards vs. Angels” to save her brother and stop Gorog’s plan, Rosie convinces her to come back by saying, “There’s still good in you.”  Alex reluctantly agrees that there is, and can’t ignore it, coming in guns blazing with a pair of rental wings and a hard landing, and even battling her brother, all to get the world’s Moral Compass back where it should be.

Nothing shows this better than The Finale, though.  While Alex is warned that she could risk her spot in the Wizard Competition, all she can think about is getting Harper and Zeke back safe.  Justin and Max are more reluctant to risk their powers, but Alex’s certainty sways them.  Not only that, she distracts the griffin by taunting it to attack her, before cuing her family to tie it up together and defeat it.  Later, when the competition is back on, Alex helps Justin out of a tree root instead of running through the finish line and tells him, “I don’t wanna win this way,” once again choosing heroism over self-interest.  Far from expecting anything for it, she tries to stop Justin from telling everyone what happened.  I don’t believe it’s because she doesn’t care about the Wizard Competition, though.  It’s because other things matter more to her (and possibly, on a subconscious level, she’s internalized the idea that he “deserves it more,” but this is getting pretty long, so I’ll save that for another post).

And while “Alex vs. Alex,” aka the Epilogue, is another example of her fixing her own mistakes, she fixes that mistake by wishing away her wizard powers, cancelling out the existence of her evil self.  Although she comes to the crystals later fully expecting her powers to be reinstated, in the moment, she’s only thinking of stopping evil.  In the words of Steve Rogers, she “makes the sacrifice play” when there’s no metaphorical wire to cut, or when that wire-cutting requires great personal sacrifice in order to happen.

Conclusion:

Alex Russo is a Gryffindor Primary and a Slytherin Secondary.

Her Slytherin Secondary, “the end will no doubt justify the means” method of resourcefulness, quick wit, improvisation, and yes, deception and manipulation, is what she thrives on, relies on, and what gets her out of (and into) most situations. 

Her Gryffindor Primary is her moral core and what drives her towards her more selfless and heroic endeavors, and what reins in her more selfish tendencies, even if choosing what feels right over what others tell her gets her in trouble sometimes.

In an earlier (I think now deleted) post on sortinghatchats’ tumblr, they talked about the “volume” of Primaries vs. Secondaries having an impact on characters as well.  I think this absolutely applies to Alex.

Her Slytherin Secondary is extremely loud, and comes across in pretty much everything she does.  Her Gryffindor Primary is a small, quiet ember burning inside her at all times, covered up by ten layers of irony, sarcasm, and selfishness, occasionally flaring up into a full-on inferno when there’s been great injustice or when people are in danger and need help, and then quieting down back to that little flame again, to be covered up and put back in her (metaphorical) pocket until she needs it again.  One side may be easier to spot than the other, but both are equally important to understanding who she is.  She may be unapologetic about her own self-interests, but when the chips are down, those interests come second to her sense of right and wrong and she’ll drop everything — her powers, her life, and sometimes even a friend — in service of the Greater Good.

(Justin, on the other hand…)

[callioope]

The Stakes of Star Wars: whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal

As a writer, I frequently struggle with plot. Is it believable? Is it surprising? Is it exciting? Sometimes, it feels like plot is supposed to be what makes a story interesting. What makes for a cool adventure? The prevailing mindset seems to be: how high can you raise the stakes?

But I think over the last few years of writing, I’ve learned something important about the kinds of stories I want to read, and therefore write.

The stakes are important, but only for what they mean to the character.

It has to be personal.

The original trilogy is personal. 

Episode 4 follows a boy on the precipice of adulthood, torn between his desire to make something of himself, his dislike of the Empire, and his own familial obligations. Luke waits around on a desert planet until it’s too late. The people who raised him are killed. He hesitated, and he lost, and now he’s going to see the fight to the end. And yeah, he’s going to recruit Han Solo to the cause, too. The fight against the Empire is personal.

In Episode 5, he grows up. He faces his enemy, but he also faces himself. The stakes are the lives of his friends, his own life, and ultimately his own integrity. And in the final chapter, he finishes what he started. He saves Han. He faces Vader, as both an adversary and family. He saves himself. He will not fall.

The stakes are not: 

a planet-killing weapon

outnumbered pilots in a space battle

impossible lightsaber duels

shocking parentage

a second planet-killing weapon

an impossible space battle

The stakes are:

Can Luke trust in his abilities?

Will Han commit to the cause?

Should Luke still try even in the imminent possibility of defeat?

What does Luke risk of himself -- not just physically but spiritually?

What will Luke do when two of his core dreams clash? (his longing for his father and his desire to protect his friends and uphold the moral good)

Can Luke reconcile the darkness within himself?

What is the power of our faith in others?

Palpatine literally tells Luke that his faith in his friends is his weakness, but Palpatine is a liar blinded by the Dark Side. His power in the Force does not ultimately protect him; and the power of the Force is not how our heroes triumph over evil. 

Faith in others is the greatest power in this series: Lando’s faith in Han and Leia to get those shields down. Leia and Han’s faith in and love for each other. Luke’s faith in Han, Leia, and Anakin. Luke’s faith in himself. 

Because those are the stakes that have meaning to us:

Can I trust in my abilities?

Should I - can I -- will I -- commit to this greater cause? Commit to mankind over the self?

How far should we challenge ourselves?

Where is our moral center? Where is our moral line? 

What am I willing and unwilling to sacrifice for myself? And why?

What does integrity mean to us?

What does our community -- friends and family -- mean to us?

The peripheral story is this battle for the galaxy, but in many ways that’s a backdrop, a container, a vehicle for something larger and more intimate: our relationships with each other, how we treat each other, what we expect from each other. Our faith in others. Our faith in ourselves.

And the only way to craft a story with the right kind of stakes, with the kind of challenges and emotions that carve into us and shape us, is to build plot from character. 

The problem with the sequel trilogy is that there is no vision of character here. They wrote The Force Awakens around the shadow that Luke cast. He was too big of a character to use, so they invented a way to remove him from the chess board for some time. Every other element of the story unravels from there. Why isn’t Luke around? Where did he go? Why did he go where he went? Who is looking for him? Why are they looking for him? How will our heroes find him? 

Every character is working to an end demanded by the appearance of a beloved fan favorite, and this is backwards from how it ought to be. They have to scramble to justify this void and they lose sight of everything important to other characters to do so. This sets the tone for the rest the trilogy and limits its potential.

We know Rey is waiting for her family. We know at some point she bonds with Finn, and their bond becomes a new motivation for both of them. We know she learns she can use the Force and that Maz seems to think it’s her destiny. But we don’t know why. When Obi-Wan tells Luke that training in the Force is his destiny, we know that Luke longed for his father, that Luke wanted to leave Tatooine and get involved but his familiar obligations were holding him back. It’s a destiny that already jives with what he has wanted.

But why does Rey care about the Force? Why does she care about a person she barely knows, she just met, who has only been cruel to her and her friends? We’re never told this, and this is why for the rest of the trilogy, she seems to be buffeted by the demands of plot rather than propelled by her own desires. Her character arc culminates in her becoming powerful enough in the Force to call on the power of all the Jedi that preceded her so that she can destroy the greatest evil the galaxy has known. Yes, this is very basic, black and white, good vs. evil, and I don’t question that Rey wouldn’t generally want to save the galaxy. But her connection to the Jedi isn’t personal and there are no personal stakes for her. She might as well be an avatar. She may sport the surname Palpatine, but in practice she really is a nobody, sacrificing her ambitions for the greater good. Maybe that isn’t inherently a bad story, but we never see enough of her personal desires to appreciate the weight of that sacrifice.

Who is Rey? What did she want? What did the Force mean to her? What does being a Palpatine mean to her? How does that revelation impact her? What, if anything, does it change about how she feels about herself and what she wants? What place does she carve out for herself in the story? Why does she make the choices she makes?

I love that Rey is powerful, I love that she’s strong, and determined, and the glimpses we are allowed to see regarding how she cares about her friends. I think Daisy Ridley did a phenomenal job with what she was given. But the managing producers and writers on this story failed her and failed the story.

I won’t pretend there weren’t things I didn’t enjoy about the sequel trilogy. The new cast performed well and their chemistry is great. Of course I enjoyed hearing Kanan and Ahsoka and Anakin in that final moment. 

But it’s not enough to offer only superficial fan service, without considering what we really truly loved about Star Wars to begin with: a human story

Notes: 

the subtitle, “whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal” is a quote from Nora Ephron’s You’ve Got Mail

[mistbornthefinal]

Madoka Magica Aniversary Analysis: Part 8

Song of Sayaka

We begin the episode where the last one ended with Sayaka hacking away at the Witch. As the labyrinth fades we se glimpses of Sayaka’s injuries but her magic quickly erases them. With the witch defeated Sayaka gives Kyouko a very unnerving dose of the Shaft Head Tilt.

The she throws Kyouko Else Maria’s Grief Seed telling Kyouko that she doesn’t want to owe her anything. As she releases her transformation though she nearly collapses and has to leave the scene heavily supported by Madoka. (cue connect)

Rain falls on Mitakihara, Madoka and Sayaka have taken shelter in a bus stop. Madoka asks Sayaka not to keep fighting the way she did against Else Maria, recognizing it as being more self-harm than battle-strategy. Sayaka says that she couldn’t have won otherwise. Madoka says that even if she wins that way it won’t help her in the end (which is true a battle strategy built around dehumanizing yourself and taking punishment is going to hold out over the long term. Not when you’re a meguca and thus have a very fragile critical hit location and a fatal allergy to despair)

Sayaka brandishes her soul gem. “Now that I’ve been turned into this thing how can anything help me?” She continues this line saying that she’s just a rock that pretends to be alive by puppeting a corpse. Madoka says she just wants Sayaka to be happy again, and Sayaka attempts to guilt Madoka into making a contract. Madoka says she can’t but is unable to articulate why. Sayaka indicts Madoka for remaining on the sidelines when she could be all powerful and storms off into the rain telling Madoka not to follow her. As she runs she calls herself an idiot and says that she can not be save now.

As the scene transitions we get a shot of Sayaka’s Soul Gem and the curse growing inside it.

We then get our first glimpse of the Homu-home which is Magia Record anime levels of cursed architecture. Kyouko and Homura are having a meeting and as always Kyouko is chowing down. Homura indicates a location on a map and says that Walpurgisnact will appear in this area. Kyouko asks how she knows that Homura replies “statistics.” Kyouko is knowledgeable enough to realize that is a non-answer but before she can inquire further they are interrupted by an unwelcome guest. 

(seriously why is this place like this Homura was in the hospital less than a month ago)

Kyubey has stopped by to inform them that “there is a curse growing within Miki Sayaka”. When Kyouko asks for clarification Kyubey passes the buck onto Homura saying that she already knows the answer. When Homura does not dispute it Kyubey wonders where she got that particular piece of info. Homura dismisses him, he leaves, and Kyouko wonders why she just let him go. Homura replies that killing him would be pointless. 

At school the next day Sayaka is once again absent with Madoka regretting not following her the previous night. We then cut to Hitomi walking alongside Kyousuke as the sun sets, Kyousuke being neutronium dense only just realizes that Hitomi house isn’t this direction. Back with Madoka we find out that Sayaka didn’t come home the pervious night. We see that Sayaka is behind a pillar looking on while Hitomi and Kyousuke talk, though we don’t get to hear the conversation.

Regardless we see Sakaya drift through a dark blue background before we cut to her venting her emotions on a gaggle of Familiars. Homura steps from the shadows to confront her saying that she can’t afford to waste any more magic. She tosses Sayaka a Grief Seed saying that she must purify her Gem but Sayaka kicks it away. Sayaka makes it clear that what she’s doing, recklessly rushing into battle and refusing Grief Seeds is a suicide attempt. She intends to burn up all her magic fighting and expects to die when it is exhausted. 

Homura ask why Sayaka won’t accept her help Saying all she wants it to save her. Why won’t can’t she believe her? Sayaka says that she can’t trust Homura because her words fell empty to her and it’s clear from her eyes that she’s given up on everything. Homura showing her yandere side claims that she only cares about Sayaka in so far as her suffering causes Madoka to suffer. And then says the if she keeps causing Madoka pain she intends to

Given how long she takes to make her move and how little she resists when Kyouko grabs her from behind I’m not sure how committed to that course of action she was. Kyouko notes that Homura’s “weird technique” can’t be used if she’s being grappled. Homura responds by pulling a flashbang grenade which dissuades Kyouko enough for her to make an escape. 

We find Sayaka listlessly riding a train and sharing a car with a pair of assholes boasting about how they abuse their girlfriends. Needless to say this is exactly what she didn’t need right now. She feels like she’s tried to do the right thing only to be used and abused and now she has to hear these shitheels gloat about how they treat the women in their life. She confronts them and doesn’t so much talk too them as at them. She openly wonders if the world is even worth fighting for and then a labyrinth-like texture over takes her body and scenes cuts implying but not showing some serious violence.

Meanwhile Madoka is wandering the city trying to find her friend when Kyubey steps from the shadows. He asks if Madoka hates him as well. “If I said yes would you turn Sayaka back?” Madoka asks in turn. Kyubey claims that such a thing is beyond his abilities. Madoka then asks that if she accepted Kyubeys offer would Sayaka still have become a magical girl. Kyubey says that was Sayaka’s own decision. That said Kyubey reiterates that Madoka has enormous potential something that confuses her as much as him, if she wished for it even the laws of the universe could bend she could be an all-powerful god. Madoka asks if she could do what Kyubey couldn’t and return Sayaka to normal. Kyubey says that this would be childs play for her and as Madoka is about to accept the contract... 

It’s interrupted by Homura filling the bunnycat with lead. Initially Madoka is shocked by Kyubey’s death but as distress becomes evident that come to occupy her focus. Homura’s façade finally breaks and she grabs Madoka by the shoulders with tears in her eyes. 

“Why are you always sacrificing yourself? Don’t demean yourself by saying that you can’t help anyone of that you’re useless. Think about all the people who care about you! Just cut it out! Why don’t you understand that there are people who would grieve if you died?! Why don’t you consider the people who try so hard to protect you?!”

Homura’s tearful plea seems to trigger some kind of timeless recollection in Madoka but ultimately she rushes off to look for Sayaka, despite Homura’s pleas.

“You knew that was pointless but you did it anyway”

Another of Kyubey’s bodies is perched on a nearby fence. It hops down to the bench and eats his corpse. He notes that this is the second time Homura has killed him, but he’s starting to understand how Homura fights. Homura’s power is time manipulation and she is not from this timeline. Homura fires back that she knows what he is and his true plan. The Incubator asks if she is that determined to change Madoka’s fate

We find Sayaka experiencing that post murder depression when Kyouko finally catches up to her. Kyouko asks how long Sayaka is going to sulk and Sayaka simply apologizes for wasting her time. Sayaka has given up she can’t even remeber what was so important to her what she was protecting. She reveals her Gem.

It’s almost completely dark. Sayaka repeats Kyouko’s line that the balance of hope and despair always zeros out.

“Sure I managed to save a few people but in exchange hatred and jealousy filled my heart. I even hurt my best friend. Whenever we prey for someone else’s happiness someone else must be cursed in exchange. Turns out that’s how we magical girls work.”

As her teardrop hit’s the Soul Gem it releases a wave of force that throws Kyouko back and then it shatters becoming a Grief Seed. Just like that the last secret if revealed and a sketchy Oktavia rises from the dark blue depths.

In the last scene Kyubey seems to address the audience. In the world women who are not yet fully grown are called “girls”(”shoujo”). Thus should those who will become Witches (”Majou”) not be called Magical Girls (”Mahou Shoujo”)

This episode is one of the big episodes of Madoka Magic we get the two revelations that we’ve been building up too for most of the show, and the culmination of one of it’s longer character arcs of Sayaka’s fall. Though we get to see Homura’s backstory in full in EP 10 the core details are pretty much laid out in this one. Homura has gone back in time to try to save Madoka from contracting. We also learn the dark truth of magical girls and witches, just as a Soul Gem is born from a girls wish and hopes a Grief Seed and it’s Witch are born when that Gem is overtaken by her curses and despair. It’s clear now the “protecting humanity” is not the goal of Kyubey’s system though we’ll have to wait for the next episode to find out what it actually is.

[coinofstone]

2x11 The Witch's Quickening

Hey Arthur, remember last time you were on a manhunt in Camelot and it led you to Morgana's chambers, and she talked you out of searching them and later admitted that she'd been hiding a fugitive in there? Have you learned NOTHING

And Merlin too, he doesn't like, double back and confront Morgana or suggest Arthur do that?

Why is Arthur yelling at Merlin so much in this? Who wrote this episode.

::Coin watch the show instead of playing on her phone challenge::

Morgana being manipulated by a nine year old

Why is Arthur insulting the food as if Merlin cooked it himself? Every other meal he brings up is from the palace kitchens but on this occasion Merlin cooked himself? Ok.

Even the fkin dragon is OOC in this ep

Morgana is so much more intelligent than this.

Gaius needs to bring this to Uther in the throne room like a member of the public? He couldn't get a private audience with the king? Ok.

I really don't remember this episode being so terrible, maybe I'm in a bad mood.

You know, not for nothing, but from Mordred's perspective Merlin is being an absolute dick, not only siding with the oppressor but actively working to sabotage their plans and hurt their people. As we, the audience, are privy to the reasons behind this, WE don't necessarily questions Merlin's actions, WE know he's after the crystal because he's trying to prevent Mordred and Morgana from teaming up and bringing harm to Arthur - that's all good and well but like... Merlin could never bring himself to kill Mordred because he's just a boy, but yet he's allowed the boy to go off and become somewhat radicalized (I say 'somewhat' because honestly, it's not all that radical to plot to overthrow the king that has been waging a genocidal war against your people for twenty fucking years) without ever trying to bring him into the fold. If Merlin had explained his and Arthur's destinies to the boy, made an argument for waiting out Uther's reign in the hope that Arthur's reign will bring peace and magic back to Camelot, but which may not happen if he sees his father killed by sorcerers, and explained his reasons for hiding who he is from Morgana, regardless of Mordred's ultimate destiny to be Arthur's doom, Merlin would've at least had a shot at cultivating an alliance or at very least an understanding between them. Instead, all Mordred sees is this supremely powerful sorcerer who isn't even a druid, serving the very people that would bring an end to their entire race if they could. Although, it seems as tho Mordred has forgotten who exactly snuck him out of the castle and back to the druid camp in three first place. Makes you wonder if Morgana never explained to him that she was believed to have been kidnapped when they found her with the druids last time, and that she went along with that lie for her own safety.

Tl;dr: communication is important kids!

Do I even need to point out how much sense Morgana's little tiff with Uther did not make? Or her sudden distrust of Gwen? If anything she should think Gwen would be an ally considering a) her father was killed by Uther, as an innocent victim of Uther's war on magic, b) Gwen was party to Morgana's previous involvement in aiding and abetting a druid fugitive, c) Gwen L-I-T-E-R-A-L-L-Y sacrificed herself to save Morgana from Hengist's men, the is zero reason to question Guinevere's loyalty to Morgana, and d) Gwen has never said a WORD against sorcery or hinted at any kind of prejudice against druids or anyone with magic.

I looked up the writing credit for this, it's Jake Michie who is also credited with some fantastic episodes like Lancelot, Beauty and the beast, and the Lamia to name a few. It was directed by Alice Troughton who has also done some good eps, including other eps written by Jake Michie, so like I really don't understand what went wrong here.

Oh God there's a commentary track on this episode. I don't wannnnnaaaaaa but maybe I'll learn something, like why it turned out the way it did.

Commentary by Julian Murphy, Alice Troughton, and Katie. I do not have high hopes.

Katie right off the bat explaining shit that's important to note, God I love her on these tracks. Apparently, this was one of the last things to be shot (Merlin films everything out of order and films several episodes concurrently, depending on filming location.) and it was being shot while three other episodes were being wrapped up - so they had FOUR episodes filming concurrently and a lot of THIS episode was directed by Julian Murphy, and Jeremy shot some of it as well. This COULD explain a lot of the inconsistency, but I question how much since Julian seems to be involved in filming lots of scenes in lots of episodes. But I guess it's possible that just that on top of the rush to finish and the pressure of so many spinning plates in the air right at the end. They've just said that for this episode they had the least amount of days to shoot it out of all the episodes they've done, which is partly why they had so much going at once. It's as good a reason as any to explain it being so off, but I don't really see that explaining the wildly off characterization.

Katie going on the whole thing about Alvarr-as-revolutionary and Alice picks up on Morgana's sort of desire to be in that position and they're having a quite meaningful discussion then Julian:I think she just thinks he's hot 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Katie says the script changed a lot even as it was filming, and that things were being changed as it was filmed so I'm kind of thinking for whatever reason this entire thing was a mess and that's why it came across looking so disjointed to me.

At least Julian realize the soup scene was terrible.

Idk why they're ganging up on Katie over the chemistry between her and Alvarr. She says she wasn't playing it that way and that she wasn't feeling it and they're just like "yea uh huh sure."

They're talking about having two units filming like a few feet away from each other in the forest, while there is another two units going in France.

Julian says they had added Alvarr's girlfriend in because they wanted to dramatize his charisma and calculation... but it's not manipulation - ?????????? Someone get the man a dictionary. 'We added a random blonde in four him to kiss so that the audience knows he's got a girl already, who sees him working his charm on Morgana and comments on it 'you played her well', but Alvarr isn't actually manipulative' ??????????

They've just pointed out two entire significant beats within a sequence that was constructed on set and off script. Arthur's confrontation with Alvarr in the forest and Merlin's slow motion tracking the crystal to show its got a powerful draw. The more they describe the specifics of filming the more it sounds like an utter disaster which kind of makes me feel bad for being so harsh on the episode.

I keep having to rewind to focus on what they're saying and I feel like I've been watching this episode for about 4 hours.

Awkward bit of prop-exposure there. Trying to work out what LK could even stand for.

Idk everyone's really happy with this scene between Morgana and Uther and I'm still sitting here thinking the dialogue was utterly ridiculous.

They talked about changing that final scene, where Uther clearly knows/suspects it was Morgana who helped Alvarr escape, so that it doesn't prematurely push the story too far ahead. They cut a look Morgana gives Merlin which, rightfully so, because it would've been too much too soon. The ending to this episode still feels wholly unsatisfying to me. I understand the little tag with the dragon yelling for Merlin to release him, I don't mean that, but the ending to the main story where Alvarr just escapes and Uther not only accepts that but also accepts that Morgana must've helped him. Overall Uther's been entirely sort of neutered throughout this episode, which I understand that partially has to do with it being Morgana, but like, in previous episodes when she's been so defiant against him, he's had her by the throat and locked her in a dungeon overnight. So I just doubt understand him being so subdued here, especially since he directly threatened her when he found pr Mordred escaped, and now another druid's escaped and he essentially knows she was involved given how she spoke to him, yet he doesn't do anything? Just wildly inconsistent behavior.

Anyway apologies for overanalyzing this episode, I realize I tore it apart pretty thoroughly during the commentary and the post became quite long. I wish there was a way to add a cut on mobile but there isn't. I'll have the S2 finale post up in a few hours - I might hold off on posting until I've watched the extras, I didn't do that for S1 but then I felt the extras didn't quite warrant a whole post on their own, so I might just tack on any thoughts I have to the 2x12 post. We'll see.

[hellyeahomeland]

[This is our last Director’s Chair post and the final post of “regular” coverage for the finale. Compiling this all now, almost a month later, has brought back a surge of conflicting emotions for me: pride, catharsis, relief, anxiety, sadness, emptiness. We love to put these posts together and we’re so grateful you all have enjoyed reading them. Thank you. --Sara]

“Prisoners of War” | Directed by Lesli Linka Glatter, Cinematography by David Klein

Sara: It was not scripted that Brody’s infamous tape would open the episode as Carrie drives back from the meeting where Yevgeny told her to kill Saul. And yet it works. All season they’ve charted Carrie on a similar path to Brody. Finally, the subtext becomes text. 

In more ways than one, we end at the beginning. Not only did Brody’s tape open the finale of the show’s first season, but this opening scene of the episode was the last shot of the series. 

Ashley: I wasn’t aware that it wasn’t scripted, but I wasn’t surprised to see it. We knew for a long time prior to season eight that Carrie was following a path echoing Brody’s; it was interesting for me that it was never explicitly referenced or referred to. Until right now.

Gail: Brody filmed this video before he put on the suicide vest but with all of the intentions of putting it on and going through with the ultimate betrayal of his country. The audience doesn’t know it at the time, but Carrie has already put a plan in place for the betrayal of her country and Saul with all of the intentions of going through with it. As we hear Brody speak, we get a sense (and foreshadowing) of Carrie’s mindset. She knows people will say she was broken, she was brainwashed, people will say that she was turned and taught to hate her country. But like Brody, she loves her country and swore an oath to defend the United States of America against enemies both foreign and domestic. For Carrie in this moment, she is looking straight ahead because there is no turning back for her now.

Sara: I love this slow push on Carrie as she arrives at Saul’s empty house. There is an air of defiance to her expression--the refusal both to do what Yevgeny’s asked of her and also to believe she’s in this position to begin with. It adds context to her admission later that she blames Yevgeny. Though he was pushing her along, every decision that Carrie made was hers and hers alone. 

Gail: I agree, and I also sense her relief. The weight of her plans is bearing down on her. Saul trusts her so implicitly that he has invited her to stay in his home and receive his full protection. Here she is, letting herself into his house with a key he surely gave her. I’m not sure betrayal is a strong enough word for what Carrie is about to do to him.

Ashley: I remember laughing over Max’s very Max statement that the black box was actually orange. I don’t think I ever considered how important that information was; he risked his life, over and over again for it, and it’s all entirely distinctive.

Gail: When I first watched this scene, I had hopes that somehow Anna could steal the flight recorder or download the information from it. Even on rewatch, I’m struck by how many different ways the outcome could’ve been different. This whole season has been shaped by a series of misconceptions. It’s a scary proposition that truth isn’t truth anymore.

Sara: Chekhov’s flight recorder returns! I have to eat my words on this one. About midway through the season I was rather dejected thinking about how the last half of the show’s final season would be about … what? This stupid flight recorder? But they did it. Who knew the quest for an inanimate object could be so compelling? I mean, I guess JRR Tolkien and plenty of other people but still.

Gail: It is no coincidence that Anna is wearing similar colors to Carrie, and my guess is that their likeness that Sara pointed out in the last Director’s Chair isn’t either. These are the two most important women in Saul’s career (life?) and both have sacrificed so much for what they believe in.

Sara: I love Tatyana Mukha as Anna. What a weighty, pivotal role in the last two episodes and she totally nailed the feigned devotion. Outside, she’s robotic and emotionless; inside, a warrior. 

Ashley: How interesting for her to be a translator — her job literally was to take information from one person and convey it to another. That’s what she did always. Her role as Saul’s asset was just an extension of it.

Sara: Gail, here’s your red/white/blue shot. I’ll note too that Charlotte, in addition to the royal blue suit, is wearing the white pearls and red lipstick and also that the colors of Russia’s flag are… red, white, and blue. 

Gail: Thanks Sara! I spoke about this on part one of our finale podcast, but the red, white and blue imagery here while Carrie’s plan is set in motion to betray Saul and her country are striking.

Ashley: God, what a smarmy little shit.

Gail: Hugh Dancy’s weirdo evil beard deserves an Emmy of its own.

Sara: This twisted little smile from Hugh Dancy emanates filth. What a despicable character John Zabel is. There must be twenty of him walking around the real-life West Wing today.

Sara: That said, his repeated trolling of Saul was wonderful to watch. This petulant shrug here is a mood. 

Ashley: This shot is great. Zabel and Saul are literally arms-length apart from one another in this cavernous office. 

Gail: It says so much about what kind of President that Hayes has become that his chair sits empty during this very important meeting (in the Oval Office FFS!) with his National Security Advisor and an escalating nuclear war looming.

Sara: I loved that Carrie and Saul’s sisters both showed up in this episode. While neither really understand their sibling, they both ultimately respect their wishes. Their appearance feels especially significant in an episode where Carrie and Saul--each other’s found family--are “cleaved apart” (Gansa’s words).

Gail: I think Maggie respects Saul, but I also think it must have taken a lot for Maggie to go to Saul’s house in search of Carrie. Maggie has made no secret of her feelings toward the situations that she feels Saul has put Carrie in. Maggie doesn’t call Saul, she goes to his house to see for herself. Carrie isn’t the only Mathison sister with agency. Maggie has quite a bit of it herself. As the two people who know Carrie best, it’s fitting that Maggie’s appearance at Saul’s house confirms what Saul must already suspect about Carrie’s involvement in the price for the flight recorder. It’s also a reminder of what Carrie stands to lose. Carrie isn’t just betraying Saul and her country, she is betraying Maggie and Franny, turning her back on all of them.

Ashley: It felt important to me that Maggie met Saul. These people are Carrie’s ONLY family, and she is never going to talk to them again.

Sara: Love the stock footage of Maggie’s home from earlier seasons! And the American flag flying in the breeze. 

Gail: The Brody family home had a flag flying too... the irony of a typical American home with a tyranny of secrets inside is quite the metaphor.

Ashley: I love that Carrie has a go bag stashed with thousands of dollars (at minimum) and she’s still probably got that wicked credit card debt. 

Gail: Pills, passports, and a plethora of unmarked bills in a variety of currencies put Saul’s go bag of diamonds to shame.

Sara: Oh my GOD I looked at this picture the wrong way for a second and thought the fuzzy pink pillow was Carrie’s WRINKLY HAND and I had a momentary freakout. Anyway, my point about this is that I love all the go bags we’ve seen from Carrie over the years.

Ashley: At what point do you think they’ll take that photo of Carrie off Franny’s dresser? She is never going to see her mother. Why remind her of that?

Gail: It’s heartbreaking that the only picture of Carrie in a frame in Franny’s room is of Carrie alone. Franny probably doesn’t have many memories of Carrie being with her on a daily basis, which is even more heartwrenching to think about. Is Homeland trying to tell us they are better off apart by showing us a happy Franny and a happy Carrie separately? The “Franny of it all” absolutely breaks my heart.

Sara: The way they incorporated Franny into this episode is very clever. We never see her but her presence--or, really, lack thereof--in Carrie’s life punctures every moment. 

Sara: Carrie slowly making her way up Saul’s house, lit from inside, is such an outstanding shot. It’s like she’s walking into the lion’s den. This show doesn’t use non-scored music all that often, so the Mozart that plays over this part is especially distinctive. It’s so very Saul, and I love how it contrasts to Carrie’s jazz at the end of the episode. Saul remains old school, traditional, classic. 

Gail: Saul’s house looks so warm and inviting. His street looks like every other suburban street after dinner--minus the Russian kill team waiting for Carrie’s signal.

Ashley: Saul left the porch light on for her. :(

Sara: I love how Saul stays seated while Carrie hovers over him. It gives the impression of Carrie having the power or “high ground” in the situation when it’s the complete opposite.

Ashley: This is such Carrie posture, her face is tense, she knows this will be the end. Look how wide her fingers are spread — she is desperately hoping he’ll throw her a rope and let her off the hook and mixed metaphors, mixed metaphors, poor Carrie. 

Gail: Saul’s ability to stay calm and play his cards close to the vest has always been impressive, but never more so than during this scene with Carrie. He may be sitting casually, shirt unbuttoned and having a drink, but there is nothing casual about his demeanor. In their typical relationship fashion, Saul knows more than he says and Carrie isn’t playing by the rules. The only difference is that for the first time in the series, they are no longer on the same team.

Sara: Saul finally rises to look Carrie square on. This scene is the culmination of eight seasons of their relationship. Lesli Linka Glatter has said many times that the quintessential Homeland scene is one where two characters are having an argument and expressing completely different viewpoints and they’re both right. This scene between Carrie and Saul, as they argue not just about the likelihood of war but the morality of it, is simply perfect. They’re both right and wrong at the same time. After so many years of it being Carrie and Saul versus the world, it was only fitting that the show concludes with it being Carrie versus Saul. 

Ashley: Is Saul standing in front of his shelf of red books? Physically and figuratively protecting his asset? I literally can’t tell. 

Gail: Saul isn’t standing in front of his red books, Carrie is. The only thing standing between him and protecting his asset is Carrie. Literally.

Ashley: The books Carrie is standing in front of don’t look red????

Gail: There is another shelf behind her at a different angle we can’t see here.

Sara: The shelf of red books is parallel to the bar setup. So actually neither of them are standing in front of them.

Sara: It’s really interesting that the focus in this frame stays on Carrie, eyes wide, nearly in disbelief at what she’s just done. 

Gail: Neither can believe what she’s just done.

Sara: Again, Carrie stays above Saul. But this shot and the way it uses point of view really reminds me of the bathtub scene in “Trylon and Perisphere.” Both scenes center Carrie in the frame in the midst of a potentially life-altering, life-ruining decision. I’ve quoted this analysis from Libby Hill countless times over the years, and it is strangely fitting even now:

“Actions that seem only selfish can often look selfless from the other side, no matter how warped that viewpoint is. Consider this: Homeland rarely utilizes point-of-view filmmaking, meant to place us literally inside a character’s head. But it does here. Carrie looks down at her baby. What would it be to be the mother of this child? And, then, as her daughter slips beneath the water, we switch to the infant’s point of view. What would it be to be the child of this mother? Homeland is all but daring us to identify with Carrie’s decision, to push our empathy so far it nearly snaps. And then it reminds us of the horrors present in her choice, lets us see how she might consider she is doing to be somehow merciful.”

Gail: I still can’t believe she called the hunky Russian kill team. Before this episode aired, if you would’ve seen this screenshot, you would’ve thought Saul had a stroke or something and Carrie had just found him. And you would have thought that because, like Saul, we trust Carrie implicitly, to a fault. (P.S. Where can I get that floor lamp?)

Sara: Carrie is literally on hands and knees pleading with Saul, begging him to tell her his asset’s name. We can feel all her urgency, her desperation, her exasperation. And Saul, in stunning contrast, is still as ever. 

Sara: Again, Carrie hovers over him. I love that Saul is forced to look at her. 

Gail: In season four when Carrie goes to get Saul in the prisoner exchange, she gives him back his glasses to put on, which in essence gives his power back to him. Without his glasses throughout the series, Saul has found himself powerless, just like he is here. A prisoner in his own home in his most private space.

Gail: Carrie’s last card to play with Saul isn’t an empty threat, it is a plea. With the only power he has left, she needs him to speak the name of his asset. But the bridge has already been burned and his last words to her solidify it.

Sara: The last thing Saul ever says to Carrie on Homeland is “go fuck yourself,” and that hits deep. Mandy Patinkin is exquisite here. He’s unable to move his face or body; all his emotion and feeling are funneled through his eyes. The look in his eyes here is haunting. It is pure betrayal.  

Ashley: The “go fuck yourself” hits doubly hard, because he hasn’t said a word to her since the serum kicked in. Carrie made it a point to ask whether he’d be able to speak after she dosed him — this is all he said.

Sara: While Saul stares her down, she can’t even look at him. I thought Claire played this so perfectly. She has to cycle through a half dozen emotions--disappointment, shame, denial, to name a few--in a matter of seconds. She makes it look easy. God, it’s been such a gift to see these two act on our screens weekly for the last eight years. 

Gail: Carrie isn’t just turning away from Saul here, she’s turning away from life as she knew it. And like Sara said, the range of emotions that we see Carrie cycle through in a matter of seconds is a master class in acting by Claire Danes.

Sara: And now Carrie goes to see Saul’s sister, a mirror of the scene with Maggie earlier in the episode. It was so unexpected to bring back Dorit for the final episode, and it totally works. Really inspired writing. 

Ashley: I’m kind of disappointed that Saul and Dorit were together in the flash-forward. I would have liked for Dorit’s only interaction to be with Carrie, as Maggie’s was with Saul.

Gail: I’m not disappointed that Saul was reunited with Dorit. I find it fitting. Life has moved on. Saul was given an opportunity to repair his fractured relationship with his sister and he took it. Carrie made choices that will forever keep her from repairing her relationship with Maggie. It’s another reminder of the price Carrie paid and will continue to pay for as long as she lives.

Ashley: Okay, good point.

Sara: I’m fucked up about this all over again. 

Sara: The brilliant irony of the entire second act of the episode is that while Carrie does have to literally pretend Saul is dead, in a very real and true way he has died for her. Again, the best lies are 95% true. Her relationship with Saul at that point, having crossed the line she did the previous night, is potentially destroyed forever. She grieves for him here in a very real way. 

Sara: I only included this because the woman young Saul Berenson is holding is Mandy Patinkin’s actual wife, Kathryn Grody. If you haven’t checked out their quarantine content, get on that. 

Sara: I love how an envelope with Carrie’s name on it has played such a pivotal role in three of this show’s eight season finales. 

Gail: We need a side-by-side of this envelope and Quinn’s letter. The similarities aren’t only between the way her name is written and the handwriting itself. They also contain intensely personal messages for Carrie, who Saul and Quinn both trusted with their lives and cared for dearly. There is probably also a parallel to the ways in which they both saw her and in the ways she betrayed them both (real or imagined).

Sara: Someone’s gonna request that gifset in 3, 2, 1... 

Gail: Dorit is the last person Carrie sees from her “old” life. I think Carrie is grieving that as much as she is grieving Saul here.

Sara: In this moment, Dorit is Carrie’s last link to Saul. There is hesitation here when she hugs her, and then she just gives in and lets the grief of losing Saul wash over her. 

Sara: IJLTP.

Ashley: I like the shot of her creeping in, face only half-visible… it feels like a 24 (drink!) type shot, not a Homeland shot, and the contrast of her coming in to this beautiful bright room from a drab hallway is great.

Gail: Carrie holds all of the power and this time, she doesn’t put the gun down or drop her guard. No needles to the neck this time, Yevgeny!

Sara: I love the complete contrast to the way Carrie approaches Yevgeny in this act versus what we saw from her in the middle third of the season.

Gail: Saul didn’t speak Anna’s name and neither did Carrie. Maybe she couldn’t bring herself to do it. But standing in front of Dorit’s door reiterates just how much choice and power Carrie had. She wasn’t backed into a corner. She didn’t have to give up the asset. She chose to. 

Sara: This is such an excellent shot. Yevgeny’s stance! The gun pointed straight at him. The piece of paper with Anna’s name crumpled on the floor between them. 

Ashley: The paper crumpled on the floor between them is interesting, because this is so important to him — Carrie blew up her entire world to get this name — and it’s just tossed on the floor like a piece of trash.

Sara: Similar to the video call with Yevgeny last week, the camera pushes closer on Saul as the video progresses. And it finally goes to a close-up when he reveals that Anna has been “risking everything for us, everyday.” His words, dripping with irony, are like daggers. 

Gail: The close-ups have been used as a way to see what the character is genuinely thinking or feeling at any moment. This close-up of Saul (with glasses!) shows us just how much he trusted Carrie, and based on the timeline, it was relatively early in their relationship.

Sara: And, again, Carrie can hardly look him in the eye. He’s not physically present, but she still can’t face him. There are a lot of profile shots of Carrie in the second act. I’m not sure if there is symbolic significance to that, maybe that she’s literally been split in two by this ground-shifting decision she’s made. She’s pulled between her patriotism and sense of duty for her country and her loyalty to Saul.

Gail: Carrie feels like there is a gun to her head and puts a metaphorical gun to Saul’s head, and yet Anna is the only one with an actual gun to her head. Everyone feels like they don’t have a choice. The two most important people in Saul’s career seem to have many things in common, including taking matters into their own hands.

Ashley: And look at that dated hardware! She’s surrounded by things that have outlived their usefulness.

Sara: The entire sequence where Anna and Scott Ryan temporarily escape the GRU team is excruciating to watch. Anna is shot here from behind the fence in the basement room. It’s overt and literal imagery illustrating how trapped she is. And yet, despite that, she finds a way to be free, to end the mission on her own terms. We can understand here why Saul wants to protect her so badly. 

Gail: Saul is still without his glasses and without the power to protect Anna.

Sara: Sometimes I forget that in these phone call scenes, someone off-camera is literally just reading the other character’s lines. Mandy and Claire are both tremendous phone call (and green screen) actors. Saul jumping and wincing in pain when he hears the gunshot is heartbreaking. 

Sara: And here, this silent cry. In the span of less than 24 hours he’s lost the two people most important in his life. It gets a little lost in the shuffle of the (admittedly exhilarating) last act of the episode, but there is so much loss peppered throughout this episode. 

Ashley: This moment reminds me of the instant Haqqani shoots Aayan and Carrie jumps. You’re never prepared for that moment, whether you know it’s coming or not.

Gail: The red books are blurry in the background and just out of reach.

Sara: Another profile shot of Carrie. Here, as she watches the fruits of her labor all season long. It’s bittersweet of course. She did “stop a war,” as she earlier claimed she was trying to do. But, in the process, she lost her last remaining “ballasts,” as Claire would say: Saul, and her country. She can never go home again.

Sara: Lots of people turning off TVs this week. Earlier in the episode Carrie turns off the TV in Saul’s kitchen. We don’t need to explain the ~symbolism~ of that. 

Gail: Full disclosure: I did a deep dive on the painting on the mantle. I narrowed it down to something from the medieval times and was feeling discouraged when I took another look at this still from the finale. The menorah, just off to the right of the painting, looks fully lit. The menorah symbolizes light over darkness, something that feels fitting to the end of Carrie’s journey and complements the stained glass religious symbolism of Saul’s house.

Sara: The show has been pulling a Carrie/Brody parallel thread with Carrie and Yevgeny all season long and this scene here really reminds me of Carrie and Brody’s fight in the safe house in “The Star.” Of course, Carrie is now in Brody’s shoes. Just as Carrie couldn’t understand that you can’t redeem one murder by committing another, Yevgeny doesn’t grasp the monumental loss that Carrie is facing now that her relationship with Saul is destroyed. Carrie’s words echo here: 

Carrie: You were asked to do a mission on behalf of your country and you did it? Brody: Is that what you tell yourself? Carrie: That’s what I believe!

Gail: Carrie has done the once-unthinkable: she gave up her daughter so children like this could grow up in a world that isn’t ravaged by nuclear war. Watching them play as if nothing has happened also illustrates that the world still goes round, whether Carrie stops a war or not.

Sara: Carrie watching the young boys play soccer in the street is reminiscent of Carrie watching the two young girls in Kabul in “Designated Driver.” The effect is the same: she’s done it for them, so that they may not grow up in a world decimated by war. But what loss she faces in the process. 

Ashley: Also a reference to Issa playing soccer with Brody; Carrie has given herself mostly over to the… I guess “enemy” is the right word, but I don’t like it. 

Sara: Another profile shot. The single tear dripping from Carrie’s lip reminds me of this quote from James Poniewozik on Claire in “Q&A” (y’all I’m just pulling out ALL the quotes this time):

“As for Danes, she has the less showy part here, but it’s impressively complicated. She demonstrates Carrie in control (her shutting off the cameras shows both sympathy and power), leading Brody through his cover story, taking it apart and then bringing down the hammer—Dana—before walking him to a place where it’s OK for him to confess, telling him that she knows he’s a good man. At the same time, she shows Carrie’s delicate state in the moment, drawing on the feelings for Brody that she has, or at least once had. If she’s fooling Brody with her sympathy now, she’s fooling me too. There’s an almost sexual intimacy to the way these one-time lovers work through the confession: one tear rolling down Brody’s face, a drip of moisture from Carrie’s nose—her nose!—as Brody lies down like he wants to sleep forever.”

Sara: Another TV being turned off!

Sara: Hugh Dancy was so deliciously evil as Zabel, who was a real weasel. His expression here is one of true disappointment that he wasn’t able to wage more war in the Middle East. We don’t see Zabel in the “two years later” coda, but I’m sure he’s a lead contributor at Fox News. 

Gail: Oh for sure, and currently writing his second tell-all book. Maybe he’ll finally bump into Carrie on their book tours.

Sara: I would like to see it.

Sara: I will never this slow pan across Carrie in “two years later” land to reveal her applying mascara. Just… *chef’s kiss*

Sara: First, Yevgeny is leaning, just as always. Second, this apartment! Holy shit! It’s what she deserves dot gif. 

Gail: Hell yes! It’s also what we deserve!

Sara: There is an obvious parallel here to Lynne Reed in season one. Lynne also received a necklace from her ~beau. The irony, of course, is that Lynne was a true victim, and Carrie refuses to be. 

Gail: The first indicator for me that there was something else going on here was this look from Carrie as Yevgeny put the necklace on her. My tin foil hat was DANCING with all of the Lynne Reed parallels!

Ashley: Let’s not consider that parallel, given that Lynne’s necklace was also given to her in good faith by her paramour, and somebody else killed her for it. FOR TERRORISM.

Sara: I really can’t get over how unexpected it is for Carrie to be happy in this moment. The ultimate fakeout. Claire wished for relief for Carrie for years and she finally fucking got it. We all did.

Ashley: I know, and the look on Carrie’s face is so genuine and she might as well have heart eyes.

Gail: I still can’t believe it and it’s almost been a month since the finale aired.

Gail: What a view. So many windows reiterating just how out in the open her life with Yevgeny really is. You know what they say about people in glass houses...

Sara: Look at all the edible food on the countertops! I spy some vinegars, apples, oranges, salt and pepper. Yevgeny probably cooks for Carrie every night. Also, of course, the apartment is stunning. Gotta love that GRU money. I wonder how much Carrie’s book advance was. 

Ashley: Sara, just write the fic already.

Sara: I love the Franny photo showing up again. We know Alex Gansa loves symmetry and this is one of the better moments of symmetry in the series. It is heartbreaking, though. This was Carrie’s daily reminder as she was writing in her office of why she was doing it. 

We also need to note the books on Carrie’s desk, which are all actually Alex Gansa’s and were used throughout the series’ run for research.

Gail: I love that Carrie’s curtains are open and you can see the outside from her office. The skyline looks busy and beautiful. Her work is no longer hidden in closets or illegally in her living room. She is letting the world in on her secrets, but not quite into her office. All of the seats but hers are filled with her work. If this office is a sneak peek at her mindset, she is thriving (she has PLANTS--PLURAL!), she is organized, and she is most certainly keeping herself busy. Front and center on her desk is Franny, who I’m sure is always at the forefront of her mind.

Sara: The production design in this office is incredible. First, it looks like an office Carrie would have. All the papers and books scattered about, and yet somehow organized (everything is in mostly neat piles). 

I love the Russian doll at the far right of Carrie’s desk. It is a perfect metaphor for Carrie. A person inside a person inside a person inside a person. 

Ashley: It would have been criminal not to see one more Carrie wall. I would have sued.

Gail: This is the CIA wall where Carrie was finally able to get Brody the recognition she felt he deserved. Quinn too. Carrie has spent the last four seasons trying to answer for all of the blood on her hands, and in writing her book, maybe she can finally atone for some of it.

Sara: This is a searing, unforgettable image. The black ghost on the poster that reads “LEGACY OF TORTURE” stands out among the ocean of white paper. And what a legacy Carrie confronts here. The wall itself is filled with ghosts of all kinds: Warner, Brody, Dante, Quinn, Keane. And then there’s her real-life counterpart Ed Snowden, rendered in the ironically patriotic colors of America’s flag (or, again, is it Russia’s?) staring right back at her. 

Sara: So many details. Thanks to Lesli Linka Glatter, we know that the post-its on the window are the chapter titles of Carrie’s book and actual episode titles throughout the series. All the attention to detail here is mesmerizing. 

Gail: Sara gets her pretty, happy Carrie and I get my Spy Carrie. The post-it notes and easter eggs are the cherry on top of an already amazing series finale. Carrie taking a moment to look around the room at her old life while her new one is literally right outside her door waiting is so poignant.

Sara: We had it on the bingo card and it finally happened! The closing score from “The Star” plays over this scene, and if there’s one piece of music in Homeland that can easily conjure the emotions of loss, it’s this. At the end of “The Star,” Carrie is forced to pay tribute to Brody in her own private way. Now, she’s about to tell her own story to the entire world. 

Gail: By the end of “The Star” Brody had lost everything, including his life, and by the end of “Prisoners of War,” so has Carrie, albeit only metaphorically. When she drew Brody’s star on the wall at the CIA it was an act of defiance, of doing what she felt was right in her heart. Here she is again, defying the CIA and doing what she feels is right. The symmetry of it is breathtaking, especially with that gorgeous score from Sean Callery playing throughout.

Sara: One final Saul over-the-shoulder shot of the season (I mean series... sob)!

Sara: I love the little moments in the last act that give meaning and color to their life together. Her raised-eyebrow look at him as he’s grooving to the jazz is perfect. Carrie finally found a man who loves jazz as much as she does and that’s beautiful. 

Gail: Sharing her love of jazz music with Yevgeny seems symbolic of how much she’s let him into her life and into who she really is.

Sara: Never in 400,000 years would I think Homeland would feature a live musical performance on its show. Kamasi Washington was incredible. It’s such a perfect callback and tribute to the bones and DNA of the show. 

Gail: Russian hearts are breaking all over Moscow tonight.

Sara: Legendaric. 

Sara: The way the light hits Carrie here is gorgeous. There is symbolism to the fact that Yevgeny is completely in the dark. She looks at him, searching. 

Ashley: This shot is just really really really really really really (really to the power of infinity) beautiful.

Gail: “Somewhere down there, there’s a tiny sliver of green just taking its time. This is how everything works. You wait. You lay low. And then you come to life.”

Sara: GAIL.

Sara: This was probably unintentional, but I was struck by the symmetry of Carrie ascending and descending the staircase in the theater just as she did in the first act of the episode, repeatedly, in Saul’s house. It feels very fitting to me. In the beginning, she’s destroying her relationship with Saul. Now, she’s attempting to rebuild it. 

Gail: Carrie beginning to rebuild her relationship with Saul in a place like this, surrounded by religious symbolism, feels right. She leaves the shadows of her place in the audience and steps into the light.

Gail: The last time we saw Carrie look into a mirror she didn’t have time to shower or put any effort into her appearance. Now Carrie seems to have all the time in the world because girlfriend looks AMAZING.

Sara: More Lynne Reed parallels, this time with the purse swap, which bears a striking resemblance to the compact swap in “Grace.” I love that both Carrie and Saul have consistent means of communication with their assets. Saul’s is so perfectly him and Carrie’s is so perfectly her. 

Sara: This image of Carrie is haunting and arresting. The camerawork is brilliant here; Saul angles the book slightly upward, and we’re looking over Saul’s shoulder. The effect is that Carrie is staring straight back at Saul and straight back at the audience, piercing us. This is me, this is my story, her face seems to say.

Gail: I’m sure they were going for a similar look to Snowden’s book, but I love the black and white image of Carrie that they used, stripped of all color and (seemingly) of all allegiance.

Sara: The title, of course, is perfection. That they came up with the idea of this book in a day is quite miraculous as it seems so fitting and right for it to have been this. The subtitle “Why I Had to Betray My Country” is biting and direct and exactly Carrie. You can totally picture this in a bookstore (in the bestseller section, natch).

Sara: This dedication to Franny is simple but gutting. Above all else, it tells us that Carrie’s book and the story told within are real. She extends a hand to Saul with the note in the spine. And she extends a hand to her daughter with this short sentiment. I’m struck by how much of this show has been about Carrie’s struggle to be understood, to be believed. It’s heartbreaking that at the end she has to fight for this from her own child. This is one of the real tragedies of her story, but it makes her “finishing” feel all the more cathartic. This is Carrie’s truth.

Sara: The book is both the mechanism by which Carrie delivers her first piece of intelligence to Saul and a vehicle for her to tell her story, which includes betraying him. The irony and contradiction in that is Homelandian as hell, and completely fitting. So many things in this episode just make sense. They feel exactly as they should. What a rare gift they gave us. 

Gail: When Carrie and Saul get gifts, so do we!

Gail: I love that while everything was packed and emptied, his secret spy gear was still hidden inside his desk drawer.

Sara: Saul’s hand shaking as he reads the message is a specific detail that I really love.

Sara: Carrie’s final words to Saul, and to the audience, are “Stay tuned.” It’s masterful. 

Gail: “Hopeful-ish.”

Sara: Magic.

Gail: Pure magic.

Gail: Finally, a smile on Homeland where everything doesn’t immediately go to shit after!

Sara: In this moment the notes of jazz are repeating over and over, in higher and higher pitches. There is a sense of being trapped or repeating old patterns. Then the saxophone stutters. It wails, finally free. Carrie can’t help but smile. A secret only she knows. 

Sara: Saul grins, exhilarated. Somehow, improbably, Carrie has found a way to surprise him one final time. Earlier in this episode, Carrie’s burned it all down. Now, the light comes in. The white light streaming in from the windows, illuminating Saul from behind, gives this moment a feeling of near-religious importance. How extraordinary to believe again. 

Sara: Carrie’s contented sigh here reminds me of other moments she’s had that, like Saul’s, seem almost religious in nature. Bathed in the soft blue light and ensconced in the warmth of her music, we feel her sense of true belonging. We feel her catharsis, her relief. This is exactly where she should be.

Gail: I spoke about this in the finale podcast, but there is something to be said about watching a television series every week over eight seasons. There is an intimacy to television that builds week-to-week as the show is watched in people’s homes. We’ve gotten to know these characters, and for better or worse, we have taken a piece of ownership over them. In order for a television show to really work, that transference needs to happen and it needs to be authentic. The trick is for that balance to stay intact. Very few shows have achieved that balance long-term and even fewer have maintained it through their conclusions. Homeland didn’t kill off characters for the sake of doing so but instead gave us an ending that stayed true to the show and the characters we have come to love--an ending that was filled with loss but somehow still gave us hope. It was pure magic. It’s something I’ll never forget and something I will forever use to compare all other shows to. 

This last image of Carrie, bathed in the light of a new beginning, is a new beginning for us as viewers too. In ending the show, they didn’t take Carrie away from us, they gave her to us. Beautiful and as whole as she’s ever been. And like Sara said... what a thing it is to believe again... Thank you, Homeland. Ashley: This was a good television show.

Sara: The most shocking thing this show ever did was not killing off a half dozen beloved characters but centering its protagonist and heroine in its final moments in a moment of, dare we say, happiness and hope. Despite the utter unexpectedness of that decision, it never feels anything but honest and true. Carrie fought, she struggled, she stumbled, she lost. She lost so, so much. 

She smiles here, on the other side of it, able to finally see it all. The saxophones and keys and drums and voices drown out everything, they whir into an unmistakable commotion. And we feel this, her final, confounding truth... 

In the chaos, her peace. 

[abriaashley]

I can't do this without you. I'm not fully here, a part of me is still in that ambulance

Dr. Max Goodwin to his soulmate Dr. Helen Sharpe.

After watching this scene for the 30th time, It really struck me that Helen’s mere presence is probably the only thing other than Luna’s existence that is keeping Max together. The reason I say her presence is because at this time he and Helen are not communicating like they used to. Notice she said “you won’t talk to me,”.  She’s not lying. He’s avoiding her, most likely for a myriad of reasons.

My top three theories are that; 1. he knows that if he’s around her long enough he’s going to really grieve and ultimately let Georgia go, which would open the door to possibly forming a romantic relationship with Helen, because let’s face it at this point Max already knows he loves her, deeply.  This leads to my next theory.

2. Max feels guilty. Notice in episode 2x01 he left Georgia’s side to look for Helen and when he came back she was already dead and on top of all of that Max and Helen had already begun an emotional affair of some sort. They were both sharing things that were way too intimate for “just friends” and colleagues to share with each other. They shared their hopes, dreams, and their fears with each other. Granted, it was not intentional and both, particularly Helen, had tried to avoid and deny it, but the love they share is so deeply rooted in their spiritual beings it was almost as if they had been waiting their entire lives to find each other, so like a runaway train it could not be stopped. Again, Max knows he loves Helen, but he is still grieving Georgia.  So he’s not ready to fully admit that to himself or her but he feels guilty because his wife died unexpectedly during a time when he was unintentionally and unequivocally falling in love with another woman.

My third point comes from Max himself; he wanted to spare Helen. Go with me on this y’all. I think Max and Helen’s connection is so strong and seamless that their emotions feed off of each others’ and blend in a way. He doesn’t share his current feelings with her because he doesn’t want to expose her to his pain which would in turn cause her pain.  Knowing that she has already experienced losing a loved one, he doesn’t want to hurt her all over again, even if that means sacrificing his own healing process by suffering alone. 

He told her “I don’t want you to feel this, I don’t want you to experience this.” 

Max acknowledges that its not fair because Helen didn’t do anything to deserve his coldness.  But, similarly to how she decided to triage their relationship last season in episode 17 without his permission, I think he decided to compartmentalize his grief so she won’t be negatively affected by it. Problem is that meant shutting Helen out, which won’t last. 

I said all that to say this. Even though Max is battling his grief and seems determined to do it alone, the fear of potentially losing Helen being at that hospital with this whole toxic hip replacement situation scared the mess out of him to the point where he was forced to confront her and peel back some of the layers he had been shielding himself in for the previous two episodes. 

Because Helen knows him oh so well, she called him out on emotionally manipulating her when he finally showed some genuine emotions after being closed off to her for a while.  Which in a sense I believe he was, but only because he was desperate and panicking at the thought of not having her presence on a daily basis. 

So, I’m glad that Helen stuck up for herself and her patient despite Max’s pleas, one thing about our girl is she will check someone that needs to be checked. But I’m even happier that she expressed to Max that whenever he was ready she would be there for him for ALL OF IT, meaning the good, the bad, the ugly, the highs and lows, ebbs and flows, low-key sounds like wedding vows if you ask me. 

Did y’all see how relieved and proud Max was while watching Helen’s interview?

If the show continues on this trajectory, I predict that the Sharpwin fandom is in for a beautiful, honest, timeless love story, I cannot wait! 

This episode was so good and had me all in my Sharpwin feelings, so I just wanted to share my thoughts. 

[msbeccieboo]

Arrow 8x09 Brain Dump

It was...not all bad. I really want to like this. I love Mia, William and FTA. I want to enjoy BS like I did in S7. I want to see Dinah written consistently with any kind of actual character. Well, at least my love for FTA is still intact 😂😂

Mia

Kat was brilliant in this episode. Her leading lady really jumped out 😂😂 Her emotional moments hit the mark, and I think she juggled her post-Crisis new life with her old memories brilliantly.

We opened on her waking up in the Queen mansion(!), with a very yummy Diggle Jr in her bed, only it’s JJ not Connor 😱😱 She’s also surrounded by adorable family photos, showing that Oliver got his wish of her and William growing up together (and confirmation that the Olicity Love Cabin still existed!) Basically, she’s living the best life that Oliver could have wished for her, without him in it, of course 😭

Probably the most notable change in ‘new Mia’ (other than her being infinitely happier and living in a crime-free city) was her social poise. She’s been brought up in Oliver Queen’s old world, and is quite the socialite, only without any of the haughty frivolity that one might expect (I imagine we have Felicity for that 😍). She loves her life and her friends, and she defends them, especially in the face of Laurel, who seemingly does nothing but scoff at her lifestyle for the whole episode 😒 I loved her addressing the press!! That was pure Queen! Maybe the influence of a certain Aunt Thea?

Source: feilcityqueen

More below the cut…

Basically this Mia is smart and loving and happy, and Oliver gave her a warm and otherwise full life, save for finding her true purpose (which is gonna be vigilanteing, of course). So of course BS and Dinah rock up and upend it all 😂 I really liked how they made the returning of Mia’s memories a source of conflict, as well they should. It was so brutal to just return them with no preamble, to destroy what happiness Oliver had given back to her, just because, what? BS couldn’t complete her own fucking mission? (More of that later lol) Then Mia standing up to BS when she went as far as to mock Mia’s new world, just gave me life!!!

Anyway, with her memories restored, and bad guys to track down, of course Mia couldn’t resist her heroic calling and suited up, then proceeded to be the epic badass that we have grown to love.

Source: kathmcnamara

I loved seeing her struggle with her memories returning, and the guilt that they brought with them of not living up to Oliver’s legacy. At the same time, she appreciates what Oliver did for her, that all he wanted for his family and the city was to be safe and happy. She ultimately decides to remain the Green Arrow, taking up the guard of her city in her father’s memory, to protect the new world that he sacrificed himself to create.

Source: felicityqueen

We’d seen she’d developed her ‘street smarts’ in the flash-forwards, so I think she’ll end up bringing these together with her new social skills, and badass moves, and be an unstoppable force!! Hopefully that will include her old FTA team as well, and not just the two feathered ones 🙄

FTA/JJ

God this needed more FTA.

We got a small amount of William, more of JJ, what with him being Mia’s fiance (!!), and little more than fleeting glances of Zoe (!) and Connor. The disrespect!! 😂

William (who even knows his surname in this new life?) continues to hold my whole heart in his hands 😍😍

Source: oliverxfelicity

LOOK AT HIM!!!!💗💗💗

He seems to have been least affected in terms of his character, post-crisis. It’s implied that he’s running Smoak Tech, and that he and Mia grew up together and are basically each others’ ride-or-dies 😭😍😭 

I truly hope if the show is picked up, that they increase the William content by a solid 1000% 😂 He brings so much heart and a certain humour and lightness, just like Felicity brought to Arrow, and Ben is such an amazing actor. The new show will need a William. BADLY. He really seems to have his shit together (in the very limited time we have seen him of course 😒), but I’m hoping that that doesn’t lead to Mia keeping her memories from him for long (although remembering who their Dad is, I’m guessing she could take a while 😂😂).

So JJ proposes to Mia at the beginning of the episode!!!! Apparently they are the love of each others lives here. Dig clearly learned from what Connor told him, and steered JJ away from becoming a murdering gangster...YAY! Although it seems that in doing so, our darling boy Connor ran into a few issues of his own 😫😫 It looks like there is no love lost between him and Mia, that he has been in and out of rehab, and is now somewhat of a bad boy 😏😏 But when they first lock eyes there is still definite history and heat there and, just HJJHDFVGDFK 🔥 BACKSTORY IS NEEDED!! Then at the end, JJ has his memories restored by scary-dude-in-cloak (who I was totally hoping would be Dig or Oliver tbh 😂), so I’m super interested to see how he copes with his dual memories!! So now Mia loves JJ, but knows he was evil and killed Zoe, and she hated Connor, but now remembers they had feelings for each other and that he is a beautiful soul, and all the shit is gonna hit the fan!!! I usually hate love triangles, but this is so exciting, with the good boy/bad boy switch up, and then the opposite memories being returned...YAAAAASSSS!! Although I’d like to make it clear that, whilst I’m going to enjoy the drama getting there, I am firmly in the SmoaknHawke end game camp!! 

And as excited as I just got, all of this took up just about 5 mins of screen time 😫😫 It reminds me of what Arrow was lacking in its early episodes...heart and hope. They lucked into it with Felicity/Emily, but they have it here, ready and waiting, and are so far not using it.

Kat knows what’s what. This is the show we deserve. 

Birds

There was a lot of bird action. Apparently in shaping a perfect future, Oliver saw fit that Mia never met BS or Dinah...this is why we stan 😂😂 Dinah has also seemingly been erased from the history books 😬, waking up after Oliver’s funeral (😒😭) 20 years in the future, so naturally becomes a bohemian, opens a bar and sings a lot. Cool, I’d probably do the same 😂😂 Laurel, it seems, went off to spend time with Sara, and has apparently become a solo time-traveller, trying to stop 2041 from becoming a really bad year. Righto. 

Dinah was actually ok in this episode, if not hugely out of character, but that in itself has been inconsistent throughout the show, so here’s hoping that the zen-filled peacemaker that she was in this episode continues! Dinah’s new-found peace and bearability seemingly comes at the cost of Laurel being utterly awful. She rocked up in the future like Billy Big Bollocks with a huge chip on her shoulder, just sneering her way through the episode. She had such bitterness, disdain and anger directed towards Mia (and Dinah, at times) for no apparent reason, when they seemed to have somewhat bonded previously?! She spent the majority of the episode sauntering around looking down on everyone, portraying a bitchy-tomboy type, deeming anything vaguely typically feminine or not hard-moody-’badass’ as beneath her. This is not #girlpower. Fuck off.

Then we have that clusterfuck of a scene at the exhibition 🙈🙈 where BS tries to tell Mia that she used to date her Dad, before quickly correcting herself to “some version of him, anyway”, as if they were one and the same 🙄 Laurel’s continual need to imply that she knows, or has history with our Oliver is infuriating as hell. E2 Oliver died on the Gambit in his early 20s. Even if he was similar in character to E1 Oliver up until then, that person bears no likeness to the man he became. Her past with her ‘Ollie’ is entirely irrelevant to the man that was Mia’s father, who she barely even got to know at all save for a couple of episodes in S8. And not only the implication that she knew him, but then to actually try to trash him as well, to his kid?! All to push her idea that all versions of people are the same (which was refuted when JJ doesn’t even turn out to be behind the Deathstroke mask anyhow)? NO! At least Dinah and Mia were cringing along with us 😂

It’s just astounding, the turnaround they’ve managed with Laurel/BS. They already did the unthinkable in S7 and got a lot of people from this side of the fandom to empathise and warm to her, without pissing off her existing fans. I really did grow to like her in S7 (check my reviews, I still can’t believe it 😂), she was snarky, but not bitchy, and showed some heart and vulnerability. So it’s mind-blowing how they took all that growth and just obliterated it this season, and then even more so in this episode where she is just plain nasty and unlikeable. 

I do think, however, that giving BS and Mia a tempestuous relationship from the off was a good idea, cos let’s face it, you can tell there is no love lost between them. But they could have made them clash in a better way than BS just being an arsehole to Mia for most of the episode. My best guess is her anger comes from Mia coming out of Crisis with a life untouched by violence, whilst her earth was still lost? (Was it? I can’t actually remember if E2 came back.) She can’t complete her self-appointed mission on her own and knows she needs Mia’s help to do it?? I don’t know. She had a lot to say about JJ supposedly being a ‘homicidal manic’...pot, kettle much?! She also seemed to find the notion of Mia initially wanting to just appreciate the peaceful life she had been given and not becoming a vigilante reprehensible, but why? BS is the one that needs to atone for past sins. Mia does not. 

Stray thoughts

That cliffhanger!!! WHO TOOK OUR WILLIAM?!?!?!

The music was...not good. Especially during the fight scenes. Arrow was always so on-point with its score. I don’t understand how this can be so bad?! I did like hearing Mia’s theme in there, though, that was a nice tie-in the old flash-forwards.

Who is this Kevin that cheated on William? He must be destroyed!😡

Some of that future make-up was really something 😬😬 2040 is all about the severe/dead and unblended looks, apparently. The fashion was fabulous though!

The dialogue in the action scenes was soooo hammy.

Who is the mysterious, villainous “she”???

“Frack you!” and “I’m not interested in joining your Canary club” YAASS MIA 😂

William and Mia’s “pet rock” talk was super cute 😍 

Oliver’s statue!! 😭😭😭

Hopes for the future, if series gets picked up:

Increased focus on Mia/FTA. We have such a fresh, interesting, diverse cast, with intertwined back stories ready to go for this show here already, waiting to be used. USE THEM.

A deadly outbreak of avian flu 😂🙊

Failing said outbreak...keep the birds in the background or MAKE THEM LIKEABLE. This is a chance for a clean slate!

I wanna see Papa Dig so bad. David had said we’d get to see 2040 Dig in Arrow, but looks like that isn’t going to happen now, and I’d just love to see how he is. I can also imagine David being entirely done, and not wanting to be a part of this, however, but a cheeky little cameo would be amazing 😂

SmoaknHawke to RISE 🔥🔥🔥

As it stands, I’ll watch if it goes to series, but for how long remains in question. I just know I cannot get on board with the faux feminist “heart/vulnerability/girly is ‘weak’! Let’s be hard/edgy/angry badasses and fight men and show the world we’re strong pow pow pow” narrative that BS in particular, but also the general tone of the show overall, is trying to portray. I really think that if the show is picked up that they should look to see what is working and what is falling flat on its arse. It’s in dire need of more heart and fewer birds imo, but we can have both, if they’d just write them as better people.

Thank you to the beautiful gif-makers 😘 Any uncredited gifs are mine.

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