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#and it utterly kills the vibe
deer-with-a-stick · 6 months
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I think someone should just throw all of the BG3 companions into Dungeon of the Mad Mage. Just take the post-canon generally considered "good" endings and throw em in there.
Why? Because it would be hilarious to me and also that's like the one official module that goes up to level 20.
I won't lie and say the only thing I can think of is the team trying to kill an angry mechanical purple worm while screeching at Gale because "what do you mean we're in Waterdeep and you know the bastard who owns this death trap?? I was perfectly alright in the damn Underdark thank you very much I did not sign up for this"
#my vampire companion has been dead for possibly over 200 years#and we would like to revive him please#sometimes i think of the fact that gale knows halaster blackcloak personally and cackle to myself#you know what's also a fun thing to think about#cleric capstone is basically you've got a deity speed-dial for your needs#to not mention true resurrection in GENERAL#or WISH#gale realizing that he's fairly close to the power level of a chosen of mystra now like :0#karlach is probably like “HELL YEAH I CAN HIT MORE THINGS” while being extra stronk#i thought the idea of monster hunter ranger wyll or something along those lines was compelling so he gets to speed run his level ups#lae'zel angrily hacking away at enemies like “FUCKING DAMN IT I HAVE A REVOLUTION TO GET BACK TO GET OUT OF MY WAY”#tara mysteriously being utterly unhampered by the teleportation restrictions like “quite a kerfuffle you've found yourself in mr. dekarios”#halsin gets to live as a bear 24/7 with druid capstone#astarion would like to make sure his gaggle of vampire spawn don't kill anyone but also the promise of Stab and Feral are highly compelling#if minthara's here she's just vibing. blood guts and gore. her favorite. now stop wasting her time and let her kill you#someone should give lae'zel a gun even if so she can reenact that 200+ damage in one round event with percy de rolo#lae'zel deserves a gun#so does shadowheart and karlach#if i gave gale wyll and astarion a gun i think the recoil would kill them actually#str 8 gang lmfao#baldur's gate 3#bg3#baldur's gate three#bg3 spoilers#gale of waterdeep#bg3 gale#astarion#bg3 wyll#wyll ravengard#karlach bg3
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dutybcrne · 5 days
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Honestly, I love imagining that Kae behind the bar would make cocktails a la TipsyBartender as a bit, but then get genuinely invested in what limits he could push his own ( and especially Venti's ) alcohol tolerance and what flavors he could end up mixing up. That menu, however, is off-limits for everyone except himself, Venti, Albedo, and Dainsleif.
#//Or sb like an adeptus or Archon; for instance. But Kae'd be going on instinct/vibes alone to clock 'em#//Or any other being he figures is like them who could have a supernatural/extreme alcohol tolerance#//And then test them with a Creation once he's sure & they ask for one. I smile; thinking of what FACES Xiao would make jdfbgfg#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#hc; kaeya#//Kae being given full reins of the bar like AIGHT; LET'S MAKE A DRINK WITH THE MOST UNHINGED OF ALCOHOL MIXES & UNHOLY OF FLAVORS#//It's like when you made 'magic potions' as a kid; except now he can make his ideal BOOZE. And NO ONE CAN STOP HIM#//Except if Luc suddenly senses a Disturbance in the Force & HIGHTAILS IT TO ANGEL SHARE (Charles in near tears sent for him to stop Kae)#//Near every concoction; Kae ends up spitting the drinks tf out half the time bc sometimes it BURNS and sometimes it tastes GOD AWFUL#//To which he would IMMEDIATELY challenge Venti to a drink off and see who chickens tf out first kdjbgf#//Dude rolls up after coming back from Sumeru w some shit like the Purple Dragon drink or smth#//Charles can only look on in horror as Kae ASSASINATES his own tastebuds & that of any unfortunate victim he ropes into trying it jdfbfg#//He got Luc to try smth he made ONCE; and the man ended up passed out IMMEDIATELY#//Due to the alcohol or how utterly ABHORRENT the taste was; Kae still does not know#//He looks back on it and LAUGHS; bc of Luc's reaction every time he brings it up; but in the moment DEFFO panicked; thinking he killed him#//Mans can be & IS a spectacular bartender; second to none (read: Diluc). But BOY OH BOY; can he be unhinged with it when he gets the Urge
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unproduciblesmackdown · 8 months
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billions(tm): it's incredible how we just provide a little snippet of material designed to be "guy we all want to push down the stairs immediately somehow" and through this amazing acting alchemy it becomes gold. electric. magnificent. we can't get enough so we will just keep writing this loser character and the actor will somehow keep bringing the dazzling transmutation through his ability
actor will roland: [is aware autistic people are real]
#this is at least half humorous in several ways lmao but also like fr...#winston billions#will roland has pretty much said he is aware that autistic people real. and not [ppl's utterly off the walls assumptions abt what Defines#Autism or what an Autistic Person is like and how you would Know]#i don't think that Billions(tm) would be very much better at that than re: say; taylor's being nonbinary (surprisingly alright yet. u kno)#quant kid 2 could've been anyone but writing Winston is like so certainly the common deal of the inadvertently autistic character#drawing from all the autistic people allistic ppl encounter all thee time without being aware & deciding they're annoying / jerks / too#weird to live too pathetic to die / grating nerds / Funnily Odd in a way you deign to merely raise an eyebrow or scrunch your face at....#so on so forth. ''oh you know Those People we all know who are just Like That''#and deciding they must be ''just like that'' b/c they're either too arrogantly rude &/or clueless / Unaware to be neurotypically superior#also do not get me wrong lmao big old proponent of Did You Know That? Actors Act. Now You Know#so of course yes will's acting is off the shits i mean here i am am i right. and he is using it when he is acting.#the acting talent Is off the shits. the tiniest moments they give him & he CRUSHES KILLS it really is amazing i'm not waving it off at all#cue twitter randos so betrayed when kelly aucoin is not dollar bill & is like ''yes in my acting job i'm playing this fuckin asshole''#meanwhile i'm still following the interviewer who a) asked will anything abt billions b) talked abt the immediate striking intro of will's#as quant kid 2 And the immediate draw of / effervescent dynamic between winston & taylor. Someone Who Gets It#anyway it's like will can fathom that actually the people who are Always ''acting wrong'' w/their bad grating vibes no matter what they do#are not always Those People(tm) who We all know & loathe right....thee magic of knowing winston can be someone fully earnest#and of course always actually trying; & having perfectly comprehensible wants & needs. damn how's he doing that#bringing a certain je ne sais quoi to this Insufferable Loser Nerd material! so we don't mess with the process.#i.e. we will only ever let his role get dunked on forever b/c sure can't fathom anything else anyways. our Correct characters could never..#only tuk; adjacent in wrong nerd loserdom; can be his friend. rian who is correct but zany with it can be his abusive friend
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theauras · 2 years
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My mans got such an upgrade in the drip department
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owari-no-suffering · 1 year
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y'know. if someone had told me that there were seven hundred episodes of naruto to get through . . . probably would have re-evaluated my decision.
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comradekatara · 1 month
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one thing that pisses me off is when people supposedly love sokka but then say things that just don’t make sense. like that post that’s like “sokka was so charismatic he was charming everyone” no that was aang. aang is the one being charming and charismatic and friendly and beloved by everyone everywhere he goes. meanwhile many people straight up found sokka offputting due to his being a miserable little hater. neurotic freak. paranoid sleep-deprived and kills people without remorse. like he straight up gives off bad vibes a lot of the time. yes he does pull bitches and father figures, but that’s because cute girls and fatherly adult men are the only two demographics of people he actually makes an effort to be nice to. i’m all here for people appreciating sokka, but we need to stop acting like what his makes him great is the fact that he’s some extroverted life of the party when a) he isn’t b) aang, however, very much is and c) he’s literally so depressed that he makes it everyone else’s problem just by standing in the same room as them with his utterly miserable vibes. get it right
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nellasbookplanet · 2 months
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Book recs: black science fiction
As february and black history month nears its end, if you're a reader let's not forget to read and appreciate books by black authors the rest of the year as well! If you're a sci-fi fan like me, perhaps this list can help find some good books to sink your teeth into.
Bleak dystopias, high tech space adventures, alien monsters, alternate dimensions, mash-ups of sci-fi and fantasy - this list features a little bit of everything for genre fiction fans!
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For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!
If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!
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Lagoon by Nnedi Okorafor
Something massive and alien crashes into the ocean off the coast of Nigeria. Three people, a marine biologist, a rapper, and a soldier, find themselves at the center of this presence, attempting to shepherd an alien ambassador as chaos spreads in the city. A strange novel that mixes the supernatural with the alien, shifts between many different POVs, and gives a one of a kind look at a possible first contact.
Nubia: The Awakening (Nubia series) by Omar Epps & Clarence A. Hayes
Young adult. Three teens living in the slums of an enviromentally ravaged New York find that something powerful is awakening within them. They’re all children of refugees of Nubia, a utopian African island nation that sank as the climate worsened, and realize now that their parents have been hiding aspects of their heritage from them. But as they come into their own, someone seeks to use their abilities to his own ends, against their own people.
The Scourge Between Stars by Ness Brown
Novella. After having failed at establishing a new colony, starship Calypso fights to make it back to Earth. Acting captain Jacklyn Albright is already struggling against the threats of interstellar space and impending starvation when the ship throws her a new danger: something is hiding on the ship, picking off her crew one by one in bloody, gruesome ways. A quick, excellent read if you want some good Alien vibes.
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Dawn (Xenogenesis trilogy) by Octavia E. Butler*
After a devestating war leaves humanity on the brink of extinction, survivor Lilith finds herself waking up naked and alone in a strange room. She’s been rescued by the Oankali, who have arrived just in time to save the human race. But there’s a price to survival, and it might be humanity itself. Absolutely fucked up I love it I once had to drop the book mid read to stare at the ceiling and exclaim in horror at what was going on. Includes darker examinations of agency and consent, so enter with caution.
Midnight Robber by Nalo Hopkinson*
Utterly unique in world-building, story, and prose, Midnight Robber follows young Tan-Tan and her father, inhabitants of the Carribean-colonized planet of Toussaint. When her father commits a terrible crime, he’s exiled to a parallel version of the same planet, home to strange aliens and other human exiles. Tan-Tan, not wanting to lose her father, follows with him. Trapped on this new planet, he becomes her worst nightmare. Enter this book with caution, as it contains graphic child sexual abuse.
Rosewater (The Wormwood trilogy) by Tade Thompson
In Nigeria lies Rosewater, a city bordering on a strange, alien biodome. Its motives are unknown, but it’s having an undeniable effect on the surrounding life. Kaaro, former criminal and current psychic agent for the government, is one of the people changed by it. When other psychics like him begin getting killed, Kaaro must take it upon himself to find out the truth about the biodome and its intentions.
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Do You Dream of Terra-Two? by Temi Oh
Young adult. A century ago, an astronomer discovered a possibly Earth-like planet. Now, a team of veteran astronauts and carefully chosen teenagers are preparing to embark on a twenty-three year trip to get there. But space is dangerous, and the team has no one to rely on but each other if - or when - something goes wrong. An introspective slowburn of a story, this focuses more on character work than action.
The Best of All Possible Worlds by Karen Lord
After the planet Sadira is left uninhabitable, its few survivors are forced to move to a new world. On Cygnus Beta, they work to rebuild their society alongside their distant relatives of the planet, while trying to preserve what remains of their culture. Focused less on hard science or action, The Best of All Possible Worlds is more about culture, romance and the ethics and practicalities of telepathy.
Mirage (Mirage duology) by Somaiya Daud
Young adult. Eighteen-year-old Amani lives on an isolated moon under the oppressive occupation of the Valthek empire. When Amani is abducted, she finds herself someplace wholly unexpected: the royal palace. As it turns out, she's nearly identical to the half-Valthek, and widely hated, princess Maram, who is in need of a body double. If Amani ever wants to make it back home or see her people freed from oppression, she will have to play her role as princess perfectly. While sci-fi, this one more has the vibe of a fantasy.
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An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon
Life on the lower decks of the generation ship HSS Matilda is hard for Aster, an outcast even among outcasts, trying to survive in a system not dissimilar to the old antebellum South. The ship’s leaders have imposed harsh restrictions on their darker skinned people, using them as an oppressed work force as they travel toward their supposed Promised Land. But as Aster finds a link between the death of the ship’s sovereign and the suicide of her own mother, she realizes there may be a way off the ship.
Where It Rains in Color by Denise Crittendon
The planet Swazembi is a utopia of color and beauty, the most beautiful of all its citizens being the Rare Indigo. Lileala was just named Rare Indigo, but her strict yet pampered life gets upended when her beautiful skin is struck by a mysterious sickness, leaving it covered in scars and scabs. Meanwhile, voices start to whisper in Lileala's mind, bringing to the surface a past long forgotten involving her entire society.
Eacaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus duology) by Nicky Drayden
Seske is the heir to the leader of a clan living inside a gigantic, spacefaring beast, of which they frequently need to catch a new one to reside in as their presence slowly kills the beast from the inside. While I found the ending rushed with regards to plot and character, the worldbuilding is very fresh and the overall plot of survival and class struggle an interesting one. It’s also sapphic!
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Chain-Gang All-Stars by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah*
In a near future America, inmates on death row or with life sentences in private prisons can choose to participate in death matches for entertainment. If they survive long enough - a rare case indeed - they regain their freedom. Among these prisoners are Loretta Thurwar and Hamara "Hurricane Staxxx" Stacker, partners behind the scenes and close to the deadline of a possible release - if only they can survive for long enough. As the game continues to be stacked against them and protests mount outside, two women fight for love, freedom, and their own humanity. Chain-Gang All-Stars is bleak and unflinching as well as genuinely hopeful in its portrayal of a dark but all to real possible future.
Parable of the Sower (Earthseed duology) by Octavia E. Butler*
In a bleak future, Lauren Olamina lives with her family in a gated community, one of few still safe places in a time of chaos. When her community falls, Lauren is forced on the run. As she makes her way toward possible safety, she picks up a following of other refugees, and sows the seeds of a new ideology which may one day be the saviour of mankind. Very bleak and scarily realistic, Parable of the Sower will make you both fear for mankind and regain your hope for humanity.
Binti (Binti trilogy) by Nnedi Okorafor
Young adult novella. Binti is the first of the Himba people to be accepted into the prestigious Oomza University, the finest place of higher learning in all the galaxy. But as she embarks on her interstellar journey, the unthinkable happens: her ship is attacked by the terrifying Meduse, an alien race at war with Oomza University.
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War Girls (War Girls duology) by Tochi Onyebuchi
In an enviromentally fraught future, the Nigerian civil war has flared back up, utilizing cybernetics and mechs to enhance its soldiers. Two sisters, by bond if not by blood, are separated and end up on differing sides of the struggle. Brutal and dark, with themes of dehumanization of soldiers through cybernetics that turn them into weapons, and the effect and trauma this has on them.
The Space Between Worlds (The Space Between Worlds duology) by Micaiah Johnson
Multiverse travel is finally possible, but there’s a catch: No one can visit a world where their counterpart is still alive. Enter Cara, whose parallel selves happen to be exceptionally good at dying. As such she has a very special job in traveling to these worlds, hoping to keep her position long enough to gain citizenship in the walled-off Wiley City, away from the wastes where she grew up. But her job is dangerous, especially when she gets on the tracks of a secret that threatens the entire multiverse. Really cool worldbuilding and characters, also featuring a sapphic lead!
The Fifth Season (The Broken Eart trilogy) by N.K. Jemisin*
In a world regularly torn apart by natural disasters, a big one finally strikes and society as we know it falls, leaving people floundering to survive in a post apocalyptic world, its secrets and past to be slowly revealed. We get to follow a mother as she races through this world to find and save her missing daughter. While mostly fantasy in genre, this series does have some sci-fi flavor, and is genuinely some of the best books I've ever read, please read them.
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The Women Could Fly by Megan Giddings*
In an alternate version of our present, the witch hunt never ended. Women are constantly watched and expected to marry young so their husbands can keep an eye on them. When she was fourteen, Josephine's mother disappeared, leveling suspicions at both mother and daughter of possible witchcraft. Now, nearly a decade and a half later, Jo, in trying to finally accept her missing mother as dead, decides to follow up on a set of seemingly nonsensical instructions left in her will. Features a bisexual lead!
The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden
South African-set scifi featuring gods ancient and new, robots finding sentience, dik-diks, and a gay teen with mind control abilities. An ancient goddess seeks to return to her true power no matter how many humans she has to sacrifice to get there. A little bit all over the place but very creative and fresh.
The Summer Prince by Alaya Dawn Johnson*
Young adult. Young artist June Costa lives in Palmares Tres, a beautiful, matriarchal city relying heavily on tradition, one of which is the Summer King. The most recent Summer King is Enki, a bold boy and fellow artist. With him at her side, June seeks to finally find fame and recognition through her art, breaking through the generational divide of her home. But growing close to Enki is dangerous, because he, like all Summer Kings, is destined to die.
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The Blood Trials (The Blood Gifted duology) by N.E. Davenport
After Ikenna's grandfather is assasinated, she is convinced that only a member of the Praetorian guard, elite soldiers, could’ve killed him. Seeking to uncover his killer, Ikenna enrolls in a dangerous trial to join the Praetorians which only a quarter of applicants survive. For Ikenna, the stakes are even higher, as she's hiding forbidden blood magic which could cost her her life. Mix of fantasy and sci-fi. While I didn’t super vibe with this one, I suspect fans of action packed romantasy will enjoy it.
Babel-17 by Samuel R. Delany
1960s classic. Rydra Wong is a space captain, linguist and poet who is set on learning to understand Babel-17, a language which is humanity's only clue at the enemy in an interstaller war. But Babel-17 is more than just a language, and studying it may change Rydra forever.
Pet (Pet duology) by Akwaeke Emezi
Young adult novella. Jam lives in a utopian future that has been freed of monsters and the systems which created and upheld them. But then she meets Pet, a dangerous creature claiming to be hunting a monster still among them, prepared to stop at nothing to find them. While I personally found the word-building in Pet lacking, it deftly handles dark subjects of what makes a human a monster.
Bonus AKA I haven’t read these yet but they seem really cool
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Lion's Blood by Steven Barnes
Alternate history in which Africans colonized South America while vikings colonized the North. The vikings sell abducted Celts and Franks as slaves to the South, one of which is eleven-years-old Irish boy Aidan O'Dere, who was just bought by a Southern plantation owner.
The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow
Young adult dystopia. Ellie lives in a future where humanity is under the control of the alien Ilori. All art is forbidden, but Ellie keeps a secret library; when one of her books disappears, she fears discovery and execution. M0Rr1S, born in a lab and raised to be emotionless, finds her library, and though he should deliver her for execution, he finds himself obsessed with human music. Together the two embark on a roadtrip which may save humanity.
Womb City by Tlotlo Tsamaase
Lelah lives in future Botswana, but despite money and fame she finds herself in an unhappy marriage, her body controlled via microchip by her husband. After burying the body of an accidental hit and run, Lelah's life gets worse when the ghost of her victim returns to enact bloody vengeance.
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Orleans by Sherri L. Smith
Young adult. Fen de la Guerre, living in a quarantined Gulf Coast left devestated by storms and sickness, is forced on the run with a newborn after her tribe is attacked. Hoping to get the child to safety, Fen seeks to get to the other side of the wall, she teams up with a scientist from the outside the quarantine zone.
Everfair by Nisi Shawl
A neo-victorian alternate history, in which a part of Congo was kept safe from colonisation, becoming Everfair, a safe haven for both the people of Congo and former slaves returning from America. Here they must struggle to keep this home safe for them all.
The Splinter in the Sky by Kemi Ashing-Giwa
Space opera. Enitan just wants to live a quiet life in the aftermath of a failed war of conquest, but when her lover is killed and her sister kidnapped, she's forced to leave her plans behind to save her sister.
Honorary mentions AKA these didn't really work for me but maybe you guys will like them: The City We Became (Great Cities duology) by N.K. Jemisin, The Lesson by Cadwell Turnbull, The A.I. Who Loved Me by Alyssa Cole
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megaderping · 3 days
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I feel like when people compare Akechi to Light Yagami, they fundamentally misunderstand his character. Their similarities really end at their designs, and Light is the kind of person Akechi would despise. Light Yagami lives a pretty privileged life at the start of Death Note. He has a stable home, with two parents and a sister who care about him. He's a successful student. There isn't really inherent tragedy to his life. The whole reason he starts using the Death Note is a mix of curiosity and a jaded worldview, and when it works it empowers him, very quickly goes to his head, as he believes he is one who can be a god of a "new world" once the shock of his initial kills wears off. While his first kill was to help someone, that altruism didn't last. He is in charge of his choices, while Ryuk mostly vibes and maybe eggs him on a little. Fundamentally, Light has something Akechi lacks: agency, and a comfortable life he took for granted. Meanwhile, Akechi is someone who lived on the bottom rung of Japanese society. His very existence is shameful there, between his mother being a sex worker, his status as an illegitimate/"throw away" child, and his mother's suicide. Years languishing in a foster system that is notoriously inhumane, in a country where 90% of the adoptions are grown men for inheritance and patriarchal reasons, while very few children in the system find permanent homes. When Akechi awakens his power, he approaches Shido not because he wants to kill people but for a stupid revenge plan cooked up by a traumatized child who's been nudged along by a malevolent god. He wants to build Shido up so that at the height of his power, he can expose him for the monster he really is, while another part of him genuinely wants to be useful to Shido, as Cogkechi later calls out. His feelings are a mess of contradictions, and so it's no surprise that Shido was able to mold him into his assassin at only 15 years old. It's also worth noting that Akechi only approaches Shido with his ability to cause psychotic breakdowns. Shido is the one who teaches and instructs him to do shutdowns. He's still complicit, very sunk cost with his revenge plan, but as I spoke of here, even if he wanted to quit, he couldn't alone. Shido's cleaner and control of the law and ability to effortlessly turn him in would render the Metaverse his only safe haven. I think people look at 11/20 Akechi and Akechi in the early parts of the engine room and assume that's just his "true self," when in reality it's another mask. Royal makes it very clear because in Rank 7, he outright warns Joker of what's to come via a pool metaphor and offers an out (though he's MUCH happier if you don't take it/stick to your principles), and in Rank 8, he goes on that big "I hate you" speech... while Sunset Bridge is playing. Y'know, the song that plays at the end of most confidants to reaffirm bonds. So when he smiles as he shoots what he assumes to be Joker, that doesn't mean he's genuinely happy. More likely, he's an emotional clusterfuck, given he also is disoriented enough to namedrop "Shido-san" over the phone, and in the subsequent meeting with Shido, tells him not to kill the Phantom Thieves and that Morgana is "just a cat." Yes, he says they'll make them fear for the rest of their lives, but remember, he's talking to Shido. The things he says are likely all incredibly calculated to sound appealing to Shido. And when you consider that he planned to utterly destroy Shido's reputation after the election, the "delay" makes even more sense.
Later, Akechi goes on about how the people he induced shutdowns on were deserving of their fates, but I don't think he believes it so much as it's the only way he could convince himself that it was worth it, and given how much society failed him, and given how many of the people he targeted were likely rivals/competitors or rich fucks, I think he'd be less inclined to assume good faith. Kunikazu Okumura was not an innocent little victim, after all. He was one of the people who requested breakdowns and shutdowns the most. I think Akechi enjoyed killing him not because of how it'd hurt Haru, but because of catharsis. Because Okumura is just as monstrous as Shido, so why should he feel remorse? However, I don't believe he feels the same about Wakaba, as when he discusses her with Shido, he mentions how her fate was because she refused to willingly work for him. It's another justification, but I personally think Wakaba's death was the most painful for him because he was effectively making Futaba just like him. That's why I think his reaction to Sae threatening Sojiro's custody was genuine. Anyway, evil grinning Akechi is just another mask, as I said. Keep in mind, this is someone who laments not meeting Joker years ago, someone who Morgana outright points out is lying about his hatred. And that's the thing. Light Yagami, while a really fascinating character, is not someone who had all this childhood suffering or lack of agency. He does not regret his actions in the slightest and goes down due to his own hubris in both the anime and the manga. While you can argue that Ryuk set him up by dropping the Death Note, Light was the one who picked it up and chose to use it. Any nudging from Ryuk didn't coerce Light into doing it because Light seized the opportunity. No, if Light Yagami is like anyone in Persona 5, it's Masayoshi Shido, not Goro Akechi. Both believe they are god/god's chosen, that they are the ones who will reshape the world to their ideals, and to be frank, both use and abuse women to serve their own purposes. Goro Akechi goes down sacrificing himself for the Thieves and pleading with them to stop his father and again in Maruki's reality when he refuses to let Joker accept a gilded prison of a world for his sake when he knows better than anyone what it's like to have no true freedom. If you max his confidant, you see him in the postcredits, leaving his survival entirely possible, and I think it works because at the end of the day, Akechi was meant to be a victim and a foil. Light is a villain protagonist and a cautionary tale. Though its his POV we follow, he isn't someone we're meant to root for, but I definitely don't think enjoying the character is a bad thing at all. He's really interesting! I just think that a lot of the Akechi and Light comparisons are surface level at best.
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joonipertree · 2 months
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Sano Manjiro, the most frustrating man to have a crush on
You learnt that Mikey punched a guy who asked you out. Mikey refuses to explain why. Both of you are dumbasses.
Tags: fluff, stupid shit, getting together, friends to lovers, fem bodied reader, smut at the end, it's him just eating you out sjsns, slight Dom/sub undertones because I can't help myself
  Mikey was a dumbass. 
In every sense of the word, he was a short fucking dumbass with a deep melodic voice and great hair. The biggest dumbass in the world. You wanted to punch him in the face and kiss him at the same time. Genuinely, you couldn’t stand that man. In no way could you imagine him ever being a good boyfriend. He’d suck at it-----
“Oi, Sano Manjiro.” 
The man in question turned, face dead and eyebrow twitching. 
“What?”
“Did you beat up the guy? 
“I beat up a lot of guys.”
“The guy who asked me out.”
Mikey sat back with his palms on the ground and Toman jacket secured on his back. His hair had gotten long, a bit too long for his liking and he still hadn’t decided how to cut it. You’d already taken the liberty over the last few weeks to tie them in pigtails and braid them to your heart’s content. He’d just walk around like that without batting an eye. 
“Yeah, he went out with one hit. You could do better.”
“Do you know who you are? The fuck. That could have killed him.”
“He isn’t in the hospital or anything.”
You turned around, not being able to take a look at your friend anymore than you needed to. Everyone around you stared with either pity or annoyance. Sanzu, Emma and Ken-chin were utterly done with Mikey’s dumbassery and Chifuyu was done with yours. Baji and Kazutora were done with both of you. They just always choose the stupid people as friends. 
“You weren’t gonna say ‘yes’ were you?”
And you weren’t. The boy had very bravely confessed his feelings for you (unlike some people) and before you could even tell him your answer, he’d told you to think about it at least. You’d appreciated it and left at that, already planning on saying no. 
“Maybe I was, what’s it to you?”
“Oh my god,” Emma muttered out in agony. 
"Maybe you should nurse him back to health then." 
"Yeah I was already planning on it." 
No you were not.
You left with an emphasis on your steps, back straight and eyes hard because you were stubborn. You didn't care if Mikey won at being the most stubborn person in the block, you would beat him at his own game.
"You know he likes you. He has for years. He knows you like him. Just fuck already." Chifuyu moaned out, having gotten over the shoujo vibes very quickly after seeing the slow burn drag out. 
"I dunno what you're talking about." 
You wanted to deny it. Not deny that you were in love with Mikey but deny he was in love with you. Because admitting it meant hoping for something to happen and false hope got you hurt. People got close, they saw you in your humanity and ran away. The only people you trusted not to leave were your friends, Mikey included. 
"Oh come on. I have given you a powerpoint presentation and a whole binder worth of evidence that Mikey likes you. I nearly got wiped out by Draken for taking one too many pictures." 
You snorted. Chifuyu being a romantic buffoon with an overeager imagination made it harder for you to accept it. But you did acknowledge, not with the binder full of pictures and 'receipts', that Mikey had a soft spot for you. 
You got close at 17, Mikey being an extroverted loud mouth and you being a shy but curious introvert. He took you on bike rides, talked to you while making eye contact, held your hand and pulled you next to him and you fed him bites of your food and let him sleep on your lap. 
But you wanted to argue that….Mikey was just friendly like that. 
It had been a few years before you noticed that Mikey rarely made eye contact with people while talking but always asked for your attention. You both were hopeless and were just waiting for the other one to confess. It was getting painful. 
Chifuyu's eyes shifting to the side made you alert because he wasn't good at acting. And when he got up and ran, you knew who came inside. 
"Hi, Captain! Bye, Captain!" 
Mikey sat in front of you, dark bottomless eyes staring into your soul. You looked back at him, still pissed that he punched a perfectly nice guy. He then eyed your sundae and you immediately pulled it closer to you. He needed to learn that actions had consequences and that you weren't weak for him.
  With a pout, Mikey placed his chin on his arms, splayed out on the table. It made you aware how broad he was, fingers nimble and boney and angular.
 Pretty. Always so pretty. 
"How's your boyfriend doing?" 
Your teeth clicked and with a roll of your eyes, you established that Mikey needed to get pushed off a cliff somewhere. 
"So you aren't gonna tell me?" 
"Tell you what?" Mikey drawled out, looking up at you through his eyelashes. 
"Why you punched an innocent dude."
"He pissed me off." 
"Why?" 
"Did you say yes?" 
"Answer me first." 
"I did." 
You glared, taking a petty bite of your ice cream in retaliation. Mikey glared back harder, only changing when he looked out the corner of his eyes. You were about to turn your head before he spoke up again. 
"It was an accident." 
Your snort was loud and unattractive, hiding your face to try and compose yourself. When you looked up,Mikey's face had softened. 
"I don't believe you." 
"It's the truth. Answer my question." 
You debated your options. Because maybe saying that 'yeah I want to date him' would be going too far considering it would be a lie. But admitting that you didn't meant even more probing questions. Like why you were annoyed at Mikey for punching someone you didn't wanna date.
"Why do you care?" You retaliated like a dumbass.
"You're pissing me off." 
"Good." 
There was another pause. Mikey's hand moving to steal your bowl. You swerve it away from him with no chance of winning with his reflexes and the limited space. So your hand went to grab his wrist. 
Your heart raced at immediate contact. You became all too aware of him. Aware of his delicate wrist, the muscle, the bone that jutted out, the blue veins against pale skin. You became aware of his reddened and bruised knuckles, his calluses and ripped cuticles. They were hands of a delinquent, that liked to grip things too tight and didn't mind rough surfaces and reveled in strenuous activity. They were big too, too big against your own hand and too rough for your soft skin. 
And they were warm, soaking into you to leave a lasting impression. 
Mikey let go of the bowl in favor of holding your arm, gentle and all encompassing. His thumb rubbed against your skin, causing goosebumps to form and a shiver to run down your spine. 
"I was fighting with Takemitchy. The dude got caught in the crossfire. My hand landed on his face by accident. I can show you Mitchy as proof. He still looks run down. Even I took a few hits." 
You saw. Saw the scratches on his face and the redness of his jaw. It made you want to chide him for not bandaging himself. But he always liked it when you did it. Your eyes couldn't meet his, staring at your fingers wrapped around his wrist and his thumb rubbing your skin. 
"You need to stop fighting in public settings." 
"It wasn't that bad. A tire or two got thrown around but that's about it." 
"Where did you--- not gonna ask." 
Mikey giggled, soft and gravelly. You were reminded that the years changed his voice in a way that was still his. There was a pause and you realised the question eating away at you wouldn't go away until you asked it. The secret you kept wouldn't help being hidden away. You were tired and just wanted him. 
"You know……I talked to the guy today. Went to meet him." 
Mikey's eyes instantly hardened, looking away with a click of his tongue. 
"Ah, did he tell you I knocked his brains out? You shouldn't date a liar." 
"No," you tried to keep your voice casual, "he told me that it hurt but you weren't even looking at him when it happened. He just got too close." 
"Then why did you ask---" 
"He apologised though, said he didn't know I had a boyfriend." 
Mikey’s lips tugged upwards, turning his head to the side so he could catch his composure. And you were ready to slap the shit out of him. 
“Huh, I don’t know what gave him that impression. We must look good together.”
“I feel like you saying ‘that’s for asking my girl out’ after you hit him might’ve done the trick.”
Mikey held his hands up in surrender, knees knocking against yours almost to tease. 
"I didn't hit him, I just repurposed the accident. Didn't want it to go to waste." 
"Manjiro." 
"What?"
"I'm not yours." 
"Since when?" 
"Since always!!" 
His eyebrows furrowed, leaning back with a huge frown like you'd just told him his house burnt down. 
"What the fuck?"
"You can't just make me yours without asking me first, asshat." 
"Everyone knows you're mine."
"I dont." 
Mikey took your hand, lips on the back of it as if it was a normal part of his day. But your breath hitched and you froze. Because oh---
"I found you first." 
Your palms slammed against the table.
"If you wanna kiss me so bad then do it on my mouth, you coward---"
And within the next second, Manjiro’s mouth crashed into yours. It nearly knocked you back, if it wasn’t for his hand at the back of your head, curling into your hair. You whimpered against him, his lips tugging into a satisfied smirk. 
Chifuyu had yelled out, “Fucking finally!!”
The sound of your lips parting away from each other was enough to make you want to lean back in. Your lips weren’t willing to move even an inch away from him. He tasted good. Like vanilla. And he had trouble keeping himself away from you as well, leaving chaste kisses on the corners of your mouth, fingers keeping your chin lifted up. 
A throat was cleared, your cheeks instantly burned with the realisation of where you were. Mikey glared at the waiter who just let him know that it was time to leave. And with fingers interlocked, Mikey pulled you away from the diner, sticking out his tongue to Ken-chin who sighed in relief and leaned against Emma.
You got on his bike without question, heart racing because oh god--
The door to his room slammed open and he barely paid attention to anything with his arm around you. You giggled as he lifted you up and swirled you inside with a flourish. Once the door was shut, his laughter was loud and warm as his lips crashed into you, hungry for more. And you let him lead you, combing your hand through his hair causing him to shiver. 
Mikey hugged you close, gentle in his touch and you let him swallow you whole and envelop you. When his tongue prodded against your lip, you parted them easily as if he didn’t even have to ask. And oh, he felt good.
 But Mikey will spend the rest of your lives telling you that you were the best feeling in the world. 
“Mine.” Manjiro murmured out, sucking on your lower lip so harshly that your whole body did a visceral shudder. 
You were breathing hard when you parted, eyes hazy but daring as you looked your best friend in the eye. 
“You still haven’t asked me, asshat.”
Manjiro growled, eyes narrowed and twitching. Your head and body threw itself back as you burst out laughing, feeling free because you knew Mikey’s arm would never let you fall. That led your neck to be exposed to the littering kisses Manjiro gave out of vengeance.
 You squealed as it tickled and felt your knees give out against the bed beneath you. He’d backed you up, without you noticing, like a predator cornering its prey for a meal well earned. 
You felt yourself sink into the soft mattress, hand reached out to tug his shirt down towards you. Manjiro just stared at you, eyes gleaming with an emotion you didn’t understand and a grin so wide you could see all his teeth. 
“Mine, in every timeline.” Mikey whispered. 
And your breath hitched, speaking out without a second thought. 
“Yours, in every universe.” 
Manjiro’s eyes watered and he finally enveloped you, body a welcomed weight as he kissed you in slow languid bliss. 
“Good baby,” he whispered and you whined out. 
You pawed at him, liking the praise a little too much. Manjiro’s kisses left a wet hot trail as he went from your chin to your cheek. A wet sound heard every time his lips disconnected from you. You let him have his way, feeling his hand pat the side of your head. 
You wanted to kiss him back but every time you tried, he clicked his tongue in disapproval and you just laid there as he poured his love into you. You had begun to tear up because Manjiro's love was overwhelming and it was for you.
Your eyes closed as his lips met your eyelids, tasting the salty tears and pulling back to inspect your face. You mewled at the lost contact, opening your eyes and pouting.
Oh, how dare he 
He hushed you, hand patting your head again, lips continuing their venture on your face. 
 Your legs wrapped themselves around his waist. And both of you became aware of the effect the intimacy had on you.
 Manjiro pressed into you, hips solid and confident. And you felt his bulge against your pussy, only his pants and your underwear in the way. it was enough to drive you insane. 
You yearned and yearned and begged with pretty fluttery eyes that had him breathless. 
“Yeah? You wan’ me, honey?”
And despite the embarrassment, you nodded with the biggest pout you could muster. And Manjiro melted just at that, ready to burn the world for you if you asked him to. In another timeline, he probably had. 
“Haven’t even been dating for a minute and you're already so needy.”
He didn’t even let you blubber out a complaint before your underwear was exposed to him. And you craved him so badly that your legs made space for only Manjiro. He appreciated it, boney fingers squeezing your hips before imprinting the memory of the wet patch into his mind. 
Oh you were so sweet. A type of pliable that was only given to those you trusted. 
“Not allowed to hide anything, okay?”
And with that, his nose traced the outline of your pussy, tongue peaking out for a taste that just wasn’t enough for you. Your thighs squished against his cheeks and he groaned, pressing his full mouth onto you. Your hips jutted upwards, a cry weak and wobbly escaping your lips. And with effort, you spoke.
“Stop teasing, jerk.”
The warmth was too much, you could feel him right there but the cotton was in the way. Despite your protest, he lapped you up out of greed. And your hands clutched onto his hair. 
“If there’s nothing between us, I won’t be sane.” You heard him say and it just made you needier. 
“Don’ want you to be. Please.”
And with that, his hand ripped your panties out of the way. Manjiro took a second to stare in awe at your pretty pussy. It was so wet, begging him to eat it out, practically drooling. Many thoughts went through his head.
How it would feel to be inside you, how warm it would be, if he could last long in the tightness? If he'd ever be able to survive without the taste of your pussy after this moment? If he gave your cunt a smack, would you like it?
Manjiro decided that keeping you waiting was the worst thing he could possibly do. 
Mikey was a lot more hungry than he thought he was. Your pussy was engulfed in his mouth.
 The direct contact was enough to make him moan. Your own got stuck in your throat, not realising how overwhelming it would be. When his tongue prodded inside, you let him guide your legs against your chest so that he could have more access. And then it plunged inside and you let out a warbled moan that felt too loud in your own ears. With a hand covering your mouth, you tried to suppress the little sounds tumbling out of you.
Manjiro’s middle finger tapped against the plush of your thigh and he pulled away with effort to say:
“No hiding. Be good.”
You cried out, flexing your fingers in his hair as he went back to the task at hand. And you let yourself voice out the feeling, soft “ah, ah, ah”s filling the air and causing you to tear up in embarrassment. 
“Wan’ to be-be good for you.”
“Mhmmm,” He answered with the vibration of his hum shooting through your pussy and into your back that arched almost painfully. 
The orgasm came out of nowhere, crashing into you the second Manjiro’s mouth wrapped around your clit and sucked. 
You didn’t even care how loud you were being, brain wiping out everything it had as your body arched and twitched. Manjiro only stopped lapping your cum when you flinched away, kissing your inner thigh before moving to you for a kiss. 
You let him inside your mouth easily, whimpering and pawing at his shoulder as you held him close. You shook in his embrace, muttering out weak and tiny ‘thank you’s that had him chuckling at you. 
“Did your Manjiro make you feel good, bubba?” 
“Uh-huh.” You nodded, kissing the corner of his lips in appreciation. 
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crushedsweets · 9 months
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FANTASY AU
ok basically. janes next in line for the crown, but shes 17 and has forever until her parents die, so she's just doing her princessly duties (receiving love letters from one of her maids and looking pretty). until jeff and his barbarian army completely and utterly raid her kingdom and set fire to most of it . both her parents died in the attack and suddenly, jane has the crown and has to rebuild her broken kingdom at a very young age. very sad !
jeff is a pretty shitty leader of his own army.. its not a kingdom by any means and he just likes the power, but he has a certain magical lady in his corner(ninaaaa) keeping anybody from overthrowing/disobeying him .
bens a fairy/elf (i dunno yet) that got stuck in the reflection of an enchanted lake bc he got trolled by another fae. sallys a little peasant girl that got killed for practicing magic, so now she's a sorta witch-ghost-girl. she ends up finding ben stuck in the lake and tries to get him out.. but she only gets him from the reflection of the lake, to the reflection of a mirror. LOL. eventually she actually gets him out to the real world.
ben and sally end up under janes good grace and gets toby to protect them. ill do proxy + ej +nina stuff in a diff post . i dunno if ill even include slenderman/the operator but if i do itll prob just be like. them being gods that ppl worship or smth
i might make like actual refs for designs or smth later with better explanations.. there are some actual species and stuff that i wanna assign them cuz i was chatting with it about someone who actually knows dnd terms BUT ill actually like 'finalize' that stuff if i do refs. otherwise its just general vibes LOL
none of this is set in stone obv im just um Yeah .
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yea-baiyi · 10 months
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hualian are so camp if you think about it. you have one utterly ripped cis man who nevertheless is so pretty he repeatedly passes as a women even without makeup. and who walks around the house roleplaying a sitcom 1950s housewife burning down the kitchen and making inedible food. and his wife, a 7 foot tall assless trans dude who is actually a demon/ghoul/ghost king with the vibe of a 17 year old highschool mean girl. “eyeliner so sharp you could kill a man” and all that. they were both virgins for 800 years. they were each others gay awakening, centuries apart. they moved in together the same day they met. elderly gay men who are lesbians, actually
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things in IWTV season 2 i'd lose my mind if it actually happens (or when. because some of those things will happen.). sorry for the mistakes btw
1. Claudeleine romantic relationship
Claudia finally having a vampire lover she can be herself with. the romantic & sexual tension. the heart to heart Louis and Claudia would have before changing Madeleine. the yearning. the tragic ending. the change of dynamics in the De Pointe du Lac family. the disruption of it all.
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2. an exploration of Armand's relationship to religion, faith and God
specially in 2022. past religious crisis. how he articulates his vampire nature, his faith and his despair. lots of hints of TVA. God and art. religion, Armand and Louis. his religion (conversion from being christian to being muslim in this universe? if so, why?). "i serve, a God," would you mind to develop?
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3. dramatic irony about Daniel's past and Devil's Minion
the rent boy. Daniel actually realising he had been a dick about that. "oh." after understanding the irony of it all. Armand talking in riddles and hinting at something Daniel is totally ignorant of. young Daniel's life and messy, loving and weird relationship with Armand. some activism. 2022 Daniel getting old, sicker and sicker. laughs. angst. tension. yearning. longing stares. petty remarks. revelations.
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4. Loumand complex relationship
the love and the suffering. how they are both deeply attached to each other. how they show their care. the place Lestat holds right in the middle. how they deal with Claudia's death. what Louis really thinks about it. the tension. the yearning. how their relationship actually developed. the extent of Louis' memory alteration and how it plays a role into their dynamics. the after: how Armand helped Louis. messy divorce vibes. petty moves. to what extent their relationship is doomed. how one person can love several persons and in different ways, and how complex and delicate it is.
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5. The Groan™
what is that. a metaphor for sexual arousal? Lestat scratching the walls? Rashid trapped? some clues. what the fuck.
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6. Antoinette alive and kicking
and coming back right on time for the trial, because it would be 1) so fucking funny 2) utterly tragic, considering Claudia would be killed for killing nobody.
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7. amazing outfits
amazing outfits
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8. lots of french
i'm french
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9. Claudia and Armand's relationship
Claudia being protective of Louis. Armand dealing with it. some sort of bond rivalry. both of them aware that something's wrong with the other. Armand and Claudia's similarities being acknowledged (age, killing a human they loved — Charlie, Ricardo — and complex situation regarding their maker), even a possibility for some kind of understanding and compassion (making the end more tragic). Armand seeing a some of Lestat in Claudia. Claudia seeing Armand's love for Lestat. a common love for theater and spectacular shows. that awful experience before Claudia's death.
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10. Louis and memories
the photos he takes (where are they in 2022? will they clash with Louis' tale?). the metatextual dimension of themes such as: unreliable narration, memories and perspective, autofiction. Daniel calling out Louis' avoiding strategies. Louis calling out Daniel's rudeness and biais. how Louis really sees his relationship with Claudia? the gap between Louis' and Armand's recalling. a deeper exploration of his superimposed identities (black, queer, american man; in 1940, 1973, 2022). learning how to trust someone new after being abused. the rain metaphors. Louis saying the most poetic and heartbreaking thing you'll ever heard. his relationship to vampirism as he joins Armand's coven. grief and loss of a family member. hallucinations and how they are filmed / manifesting. guilt. loving Claudia and Armand. loving Lestat, still. etc.
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tysm for coming to my tedtalk. it was very self-indulgent but very much pleasant. i won't be mad if it doesn't happen (obviously!), or not like i imagine. still, it's fun to imagine and put that here on tumblr. no shame on lestat, i just have no special things i'm waiting for about him, and will be very happy indeed to see him again. salut
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liesmyth · 1 year
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locked tomb characters ranked by how cringe they are
because this post by @wifegideonnav reminded me that they’re all losers, but some are even more losers than the others
Hot Sauce: 1/10. This girl is cool in all possible ways and definitely future lead researcher material. No cringe, zero notes.
Pyrrha: 2/10. By far the least cringe of The Olds. Yes her nicknames for Nona have dad joke energy but she’s very earnest about it and it’s cute.
Juno Zeta: 2/10. Total MILF. Very smart and should know better than to get flirty with We Suffer, but I get it.
Marta Dyas: 3/10. A complete badass with a very sensible outlook on avoiding unnecessary forms. Call me Judith because I would also make a pass at her at the first possible chance.
Commander Wake: 3/10. She made Pyrrha fall in love with her, seduced ever-loyal G1deon into hatefucking and galvanized a dying resistance movement. She was genuinely nice to Gideon those 3 seconds they interacted in passing! Then she had to go and hide under the bed of a mentally ill teenager.
Dulcinea: 4/10. Her horniness for revenge is epic. Let down Pal as nicely as she could and managed to outwit Cytherea when it mattered. Not cringe at all.
Camilla: 4/10. Yes, she could kill you in seconds but she did once sell cigarettes, her most liquid asset, for about a third of their market value.
Alecto: 4/10. Scary eldritch woman-shaped creature with a sword, comes highly recommended by Pyrrha Dve. Loses points for confusing Middle English and thinking John was the best possible Sailor Earth when he was clearly the worst.
G1deon: 5/10. Utterly willing to burn for what he believes in. Yes, he probably needs some perspective but he made sure the baby had enough air before kicking Wake out of the airlock and Matthias Nonius thinks he’s an okay dude.
Pash: 5/10. She has that freedom fighter swag and the cool hair but she is a terrible bodyguard coasting on nepotism, sorry to say.
Palamedes: 6/10. He didn’t clock the serial killer pretending to be his ex because he was too busy going to painfully extreme lengths to avoid interacting with her.
Naberius: 6/10. My controversial opinion is that Babs is the least cringe of the Third House throuple. Yes he looks and acts like a peacock but he puts up with Corona snacking on him for no reason and is still nice to her, and gives Ianthe solid romantic advice.  
Nona: 6/10. Cringe in the unselfconscious way of a young teenager, and put this ability to use making Pal fess up to his nurse kink. She will never be cool but it’s part of her appeal.
Mercymorn: 7/10. Speaks in onomatopoeias. She knows she is insufferable so she’s gonna do her best to make sure to be the most insufferable person in every room. Once called John Gaius “the best man I who ever lived” to his smug face and not even blowing him up later makes up for that.
Ianthe: 7/10. Looks like a wet rat. Hopelessly dramatic but she pulls it off. Declares her love for Harrow at every turn in the most transparent possible way then pretends she’s just being snarky. Some cool points for actually getting shit done
Coronabeth: 7/10. Terrible taste in love interests. Her freedom fighter era was hot but she thinks pompadour hair is a good look? Also, the way she spent her whole life lying about necromancy speaks of extreme conflict avoidance. Cringe move.
Judith: 7/10. She deserved to suffer and has suffered more than she deserves. It’s cringe how she clings to her imperialist brainwashing but she gets a point for rightfully understanding she should be wary of Corona, something Ianthe still can’t even grasp.
Ortus: 7/10. Yes he quotes his own epic poetry WIP at people but he also had to grow up on the Ninth with nothing better to do. Genuinely a very nice guy.
Cytherea: 8/10. Her unhinged vibes are very hot but she killed a couple of nerds and two teenagers instead of anyone who was actually dangerous. Cringe of her!
Silas: 8/10. Smarmy cloud-looking motherfucker. He is a child Pope and I guess he can’t help the inherent cringe of the Eight. But that’s still no excuse for bringing a portrait of John all the way to Canaan House just to hang it in your bedroom, dude.
Gideon: 8/10. Babygirl is a horny virgin with the vocabulary of a nerd. Harrow is bones over tit in love with her and she fails to notice after living in Harrow’s brain for eight months. Gets points for managing to maintain impressive biceps on a diet with no protein.
Augustine: 9/10. Extremely cringe because of how hard he tries to pretend he’s not cringe. Cigarettes on a space station and effectively performing swag don’t make up for how much he clearly wants to suck John’s dick. Which he did at least twice.
Harrow: 10/10. Spent most of her life being mean to Gideon because she was too hot to deal with and lobotomized a coffee shop AU into existence. Thinks Ianthe Tridentarius is beautiful. Once built a bone cocoon to sleep in after not drinking water for two days. Should’ve told God months ago that she just didn’t want to eat his fucking biscuits and stop offering.
John: 10/10. Unfortunately, this scale only goes up to 10 but we all know it’s not enough. Deeply cringe in a myriad of ways, chiefly among them the way he inflicts his barely veiled incest kink on all his friends. That one dad joke was gold, though.
This was getting too long but for the record: Aiglamene is cool and so is Abigail Pent. Magnus is not cool but he’s a fun time. The Terrible Teens are exempt from judgement on account of being 14.
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aemnd · 3 months
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⎯⎯ TEAR U APART [sneak peek] ┆ gif credit. ౨ৎ
༊*·˚ 𝒗𝒆𝒏𝒖𝒔’𝒔 𝒍𝒊𝒍 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆, hello, lil loves. ♡! this is just a lil sneak peek of my new & first full oneshot on this blog − i hope y’all enjoy reading this lil snippet & i cannot wait to share the rest of it with u all. sending y’all sm love, xoxo. !!! (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)
꒰ p.s. ꒱ this oneshot that i’m writing is completely based on this song linked here − if u wanna listen to it to set the vibe (if u’re an american horror story girlie, you’ll get it) + if u wanna talk & gossip abt this lil sneak peek, pls feel free to msg me, my loves. ♡ྀི
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IT’S ONLY JUST A CRUSH, IT’LL GO AWAY − that’s what aemond targaryen keeps telling himself as he brutally, without mercy, fucks into the whore underneath him, hearing her whiny, annoying little cries as he abuses her loose cunt by shoving his well-endowed cock in and out, in and out, in and out.
allison? allie? alys? what was her name?
aemond couldn’t remember, nor could he give less of a fuck.
it simply does not matter right now, not when aemond is balls deep inside of this random woman, using her cunt to chase his high as he pleases, imagining that it is you − always you.
aemond cannot think straight, not when all he can focus on right now is chasing his own release, thinking of your beautiful face as it flashes in his mind − your innocent doe eyes, your luscious hair, that little charm bracelet that you always wear that jingles every time you move, your gorgeous, feminine figure, your perky breasts which he can only imagine burying his face into to kiss and suckle on your little nipples, your soft, heavenly skin which always smells of vanilla and something floral and just utterly you.
and gods, he can just imagine your glossy, pouty lips wrapped around his cock, letting him fuck your throat until he’s shooting his load down your abused throat, raw from him making you deep throat him − and oh, fuck, he’s coming now.
with only three more ruthless thrusts, aemond releases a low, deep groan as he finally spurts his hot cum into the condom, feeling the woman beneath him moaning louder and louder as she rubs her clit in quick, tight little circles, her release hitting her just as his had.
aemond wishes that she would shut the fuck up, but he isn't worried − soon, she won't be able to utter another word.
nasty fucking whore, aemond thinks.
in the woman’s state of pure, delirious ecstasy, she doesn’t even notice when aemond slyly slips out the small, sharp pocketknife of his (that’s made out of valyrian steel) out of the back of his pants − too fucked out by aemond to truly notice anything, her mind too fuzzy with her orgasmic bliss.
and no, aemond doesn’t fully undress while fucking the random women that he picks up at a bar or wherever, he never has.
aemond doesn't want any of the whores women that he picks up and sleeps with, then violently kills them to see him completely bare, they don't deserve it − the only beautiful, doe-like eyes that are meant to see him naked and bare is you and only you.
with that being said, aemond forcefully (and painfully) covers her mouth with one of his massive, masculine hands, rough and calloused, watching with amusement as he slits her throat with a heavy-lidded eye, his one-eye crazed and dilated, filled with bloodlust − not just from his post orgasm, but from the crimson blood squirting from the dumb whore’s throat.
aemond smirks, leaning down, getting blood on himself, making his cock harden once again − before he is whispering darkly into her ear as she tries to clutch the deep slit on her throat, gasping desperately for breath, choking on her own blood.
aemond cannot help but release a little, breathless chuckle, watching as the life slowly fades away from her.
“you’re nothing but a nasty, little fucking whore,” he purrs into her ear, pressing his face into the deep slit on her throat, licking a stripe of the oozing blood, softly humming at the taste as he muffles the gurgling noises she makes with his hand once more − until eventually, she stops breathing.
truthfully, even while all of this mess is happening right before his eye, all aemond can think about is you, and the taste of the sharp, metallic taste of that whore’s blood, so tart and whorish − and fuck, aemond can only imagine what your sweet blood tastes like.
however, aemond isn’t too worried, he can be patient − besides, soon enough, he’ll get to taste your sweetness, and then, you’ll be his… forever.
∘ ∘ ∘ cont,
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bemusedlybespectacled · 3 months
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since we're all sharing the whackiest S2 Izzy Hands takes we've seen: I don't even remember who originally had this take and it really shouldn't keep bothering me but it is just so absolutely bugnuts that it does indeed live in my head rent free, SO, my nominee:
"awww, clearly Ed doesn't want to hurt the crew, that's why he's only pointing the gun at them but not shooting it! he only wants to hurt Izzy, who deserves to be shot because of how badly he treated Edward!"
which is such an utterly bananacrackers interpretation of that scene that I keep second-guessing myself and thinking, "there's no way someone actually saw that scene and then had those thoughts and then wrote them out and then proofread them and thought 'yeah, that's something I need to share with the world!' and then posted them on the fucking internet. maybe I just had a weird dream about the Izcourse and hallucinated the whole thing."
like, for all the talk about Izzy enjoyers being abuse apologists, that is swinging dangerously close to actual abuse apologia. pointing a gun at someone is not proof that the wielder is trying to avoid harm: it is violence with the threat of increasing that violence should that person not comply with your demands.
Ed asks everyone if the vibes are poisonous with a gun to their fucking heads. everyone says "no" because they understandably don't want to get shot. Izzy is shot because he is the only one to contradict Ed, and the crew knows that's going to happen if he does: all of them pause when Izzy shouts at Ed, and Frenchie even subtly tries to get him to back down. Ed's threat to kill people if they say the atmosphere is fucked isn't an empty one, and the crew knows it.
the irony that this spawned from the same pool as "Izzy telling Ed that he'd better watch his step was a death threat, which justifies everything about how he treats Izzy from that point forward" is not lost on me.
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shalotttower · 19 days
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To Make a Home Out of Bones
Title: To Make a Home Out of Bones
Fandom: BTD2 (Boyfriend to Death 2)
Characters: Ren Hana x Reader (female)
Summary: You were free. Free for real, and you couldn't believe that, staring at the open door. And then, by some twisted scenario, decided to keep him. It's tragic, really.
Word count: 2300+
Notes: yandere!Ren Hana, captivity (past Reader and finally in present not Reader :D) Reader is sensible though and there's nothing crazy going on on her part apart from the captivity scenario, mostly tired vibes/attempts to process what happened, unhealthy coping mechanisms, past torture, past manipulation, possessiveness, past dubious consent, past non-con, Reader doesn't know about Strade.
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You don't talk. You never talk nowadays and it feels almost liberating, not having to converse. Ren doesn't look as intimidating as he used to. Maybe it's because of the collar, or maybe it's because he doesn't wear that damned jacket anymore, the one which seems to change his whole being into something unhinged and cheerfully vicious whenever he puts it on.
Is this what he felt, watching you tied to a pole?
No, hardly.
There was a very tangible sense of power in your captivity.
You, however, don't feel powerful at all.
You feel like an old tree: splinters, rotten wood, and bark waiting for the storm to come and snap the trunk in the middle.
Freedom is strangely anticlimactic.
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You don't know how long you've been here, stopped checking a wile ago because it didn't matter ─ to be dragged back from the basement on Wednesday or on Saturday. Days became a sequence of events, not dates, once you realized Ren planned to keep you indefinitely.
Have breakfast, tell him it was good. Do the laundry. Watch TV, let Ren cuddle up to you, ignore the presence of another in the same room. Smile every time he says something nice and expects to hear it back. Let your eyes glaze over during sex, try to remember what it felt like to have someone touch you without making you bleed. Wake up to a sleepy fox curled up on top of you. When Ren dreams his ears twitch.
It takes approximately five minutes for him to settle for sleep, tangled limbs and pointy nose buried in the crook of your neck, and he's surprisingly light for a grown man. With how tough Ren seems (or wants to), there's some sort of innate clinginess about him that contrasts so much with the image in your head: smiling through bloodied teeth while nailing your leg. At first you thought being nice was a way out of this, but kindness is a double-edged sword here: soon you realized how utterly you misjudged him ─ and how truly screwed you were.
Because Ren, while cooking you tasty meals for "being good" and letting you watch TV, likes kisses and hand-holding, and cute things. But Ren also likes the way you sob no less, and that's where the miscalculation happened. Being nice only guaranteed with some unsteady sense of security that he wouldn't kill you yet. That was all. He's sweet, snuggly, affectionate until he isn't, and no amount of good behavior or praise will stop him from breaking your fingers if he feels like it.
Your routine had been simple for months. Easy. Unbearable.
And now all the world which was limited to one single house for god knows how long expands again, but you don't really feel it, even after reaching the small front gate.
You could leave him there, you think. In the basement, and no one would ever know. Lose the key, never come back, just-
Not go back. And all of this will be behind you. You'll never have to see him again, never have to smile for him, never have to hear that shaky sound he makes when he cums, or witness his face turn from carefree to confused, and then to understanding, then to annoyed.
A death like this seems fitting for him. Cold concrete and silence; starvation is an awful, terrifying way to go. You noticed that Ren doesn't really like to be alone, and there's almost poetic justice in leaving him in the basement to slowly rot away.
Your fingers curl around the iron handle and with something akin to astonishment let go of it, then fall limply to your side. You're free, yet you stay rooted to the spot, because frankly speaking where does one go from here? Your rent must be long overdue, and your face is probably everywhere, plastered on missing person posters.
'Hey guys, I'm not missing anymore', you imagine saying to your co-workers, 'sorry for disappearing, I guess. Do you still need that Excel sheet done?'
Your employment contract had probably been terminated. The bank account should be fine, Ren took you right before the paycheck, and there's mom's house to crash at until everything goes back to normal, but that surely means cops getting involved, and lawyers, and media. Just the thought is exhausting.
'How did Mr Hana treat you? Were you intimate? Yes or no? Please, tell us more, miss. How do you feel? What about Mr Oleander, did you know him?'
The wind picks up, blowing leaves and ruffling your hair.
Ren will go to jail. Obviously — kidnapping and killing people equals prison time. The problem is that it doesn't bring you any kind of satisfaction. You don't want Ren here, but you also don't want him peacefully living his sentence while you pick up the pieces of your old life. There's no closure in that, but again...can there be any?
You sit down on the porch; cold wooden boards creak under your weight. Ren has a nice little suburban house.
What now? You have no fucking idea, just vague notions of an unclear future, and nothing substantial.
What now indeed.
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He fed you regularly, that's true; you stand at the basement door and watch him eat.
Ren allowed you free roaming within the house premises, an access to TV, books, hygiene products. Reading manga together felt almost domestic, yet...you keep him there. In the basement.
It's strange, seeing him like this, but he doesn't look surprised at the new turn of events, he looks almost resigned. A mirror of yourself in a sense, you think with a finger hovering over the button. Ren's ears are flattened, tail tucked between his legs, a submissive, harmless thing. You could let him out, allow him roam the house freely just the way he did. But you don't.
It sounds straight off foolish, and what's more important ─ scary. There're so many possibilities. That the remote won't work, that you'll be too slow to react, that he'll sneak into your room at night. Ren can be very quiet when he wants to. So you keep him there, and avoid him like plague unless necessary — feeding duty twice per day plus bathroom visits.
No chatter, minimal contact overall, but Ren starts talking anyways.
"You look tired," he says cautiously in between the bites.
He does it a lot, tries to gauge where you two stand every day or what's on your mind, and you suspect it's the result of past experiences, something that's hard to unlearn. Something connected with that body in the freezer. Upon finding it you initially assumed (not without a reason) that the corpse was his doing, but when Ren undressed before you for the first time, realized that it might not be entirely true.
The cuts, the burns, the marks and deep, jagged lines formed a familiar pattern. Someone had put a lot of time and effort into giving him those.
"I could make coffee. Or tea."
And that's another thing. He doesn't fight you, or attempt to lash out. Instead he makes those little offers here and there whenever you come down the stairs — dinner, help cleaning the dishes, washing clothes. He has been compliant and eager to please to the point of it being almost unnerving.
You don't reply, and that seems to bother him, judging by his expression. Understandable: silence is normally a bad omen, especially in situations such as this one.
"Are you going to-" he starts again, but you cut him off.
"Push the tray over."
Ren's ears twitch at the command and you briefly wonder if he expected something different to happen. The tray makes a metallic screech over the concrete floor, stopping right in front of your feet.
"Thank you," he says.
'Thank you for breakfast, thank you for lunch, thank you for dessert.' 'Thank you for the nail gun, thank you for holding my hand while I screamed, thank you for fucking me after.' You hate the words now, the way they used to roll off your tongue (thank you, Ren, thank you), because they never meant gratitude at all and felt bitter, like a moldy fruit.
Ren's eyes are trained on your face. There it is again: the strange uneasiness which settles in your chest whenever he stares with focus sharp enough to burn holes through flesh itself. His gaze travels lower to your arms exposed by rolled up hoodie sleeves. You had no clothes here except for cutsey underwear and pajamas which Ren insisted you wear, but those are long thrown away somewhere in the trash, so the only things available are his. There's also...other stuff you found in the locked bedroom on the second floor: cargo pants, combat boots, tank tops, all neatly folded. Far too big for you both.
"Is it mine?" Ren asks and leans forward.
"Is there a problem?" you ask back, then regret it.
Questions mean opening a door to unwanted dialogue. His cheeks turn a little pink.
"No. It looks good on you."
Your stomach churns in discomfort at the compliment and the carefully concealed delight Ren won't voice out loud, but drops indirectly from time to time. Not only this, but the familiarity, the implied "you're used to wearing my things by now" which, in essence, is true. It's either that or walking around naked. Ren must notice your reaction, because he quickly averts his eyes to the floor. Silence settles over the basement like a thick, heavy blanket of snow.
Stop feeding me with submissive bullshit, you want to say. I know what you'd do if not for the collar, I've seen it from the first row. Stop pretending to be harmless when we both know you aren't.
Ren fiddles with the hem of his shirt. The change is so drastic. He was a little scary at first when you met, then downright terrifying, and now...now he's just a whole another person.
You pick up the tray without a word and leave. Ren's ears droop once he realizes the conversation for today ended before it even started. But there will be tomorrow. And the next one after, and the next one, and the next one. He'll keep trying to talk, and you'll keep ignoring him until he finally stops.
You don't know what to do with him. You don't know what to do with yourself either.
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There's no distance wide or far enough to allow you proper sleep. You toss and turn under the covers despite exhaustion pulling at your eyelids and eventually settle for a late night movie or two. Ren's DVD collection is...well, to put it bluntly, weird for someone like him. Cheesy and romantic movies take around thirty percent of his library, while the remaining seventy is filled with horror flicks and anime. You go through the titles: Sailor Moon, Cardcaptor Sakura, Tokyo Mew Mew. Some of those you watched together, curled up on the sofa, others Ren had recommended enthusiastically whenever he caught your glances.
'It's really good! I think you'd like it.'
'This is my favorite.'
He remembered the details about each series, all the names, plot twists. A die-hard fan to the point you wondered why didn't he try cosplaying himself instead of dressing you up. He'd pass as some sort of a fox/cat character easily. Maybe he did cosplay before, who knows? It wouldn't surprise you.
The clock ticks 2 AM. Your mind goes back to the basement door and what lays behind it.
Ren knows that you sleep terribly. You know he does too ─ that's one more trait you two share except for the scars.
You click on the first episode of "Arcane Moon Whispers". The opening plays through the old speakers — happy, cheerful music; you wonder if he can hear it downstairs. The basement is soundproofed, but Ren has sharp hearing. It became clear early on, in the way his ears would twitch towards the noise of your footsteps when you still wore the collar.
The plot unfolds in front of your eyes: a magical team fighting evil with the power of friendship, love, and hope.
'They have an entire arc dedicated to time travel,' Ren explained while showing you the box sets, 'it gets a bit confusing halfway through but it's fun!'
It's been three weeks now. Three weeks since your freedom began and yet Ren lingers in your head as strongly as ever, like a ghost haunting your dreams and waking hours alike. It's frustrating to say the least: having him locked away yet seeing him everywhere — in the kitchen cabinets full of sweets he likes, in the bookshelf full of manga he read out loud sometimes until you couldn't bear it anymore and had to tune his voice out, and in the drawer you pull open every morning.
Ren is like a stain.
It makes you sick, actually. It makes your chest ache with something that feels dangerously close to guilt but can't be it. You're not guilty for what you've done, keeping him there is reasonable, understandable, and Ren...he deserves everything after what he put you through first.
You tried so hard to be nice to him.
You were nice.
But nice isn't enough when someone wants you hurt. Isn't enough to stop a knife. Nice is a useless commodity.
A few more episodes later you're still wide awake.
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