#and it's about two characters i have STRUGGLED with getting down

[pit-and-the-pen]

You Found Me

Summary:A mission gone wrong. Can Azriel get to you in time to save you? 

Warnings: Wing cutting, gore, descriptions of pain, near character death, angsty angst, one singular use of y/n 

Disclaimer: This is a dark one so please use caution when reading and please let me know if there is any warning I need to add.

WC: ~3k

Walking into that house, you instantly knew something was wrong. Every part of your body was screaming at you to turn around and leave, calling for one of the male to come and help you. But that small prideful part of you, remembering that small joke that Cassian made the other day, you’d be lost without us sweetheart, kept you from doing exactly that. Needing to prove that you didn't always need the Illyrian soldiers to come clean up your messes. 

So you pushed down that little voice in your head and gripped your sword a little tighter, wings flaring out behind you at the unease in your stomach. Taking a step past the doorway, you held your breath, ears scanning the room for any sound other than your racing heart. You forced yourself to take a deep breath, attempting to calm yourself down. It didn’t work in the slightest. 

Your hands were trembling on the grip you had on the hilt of your sword and you mentally cursed yourself. Get it together. All you had to do was look for some notebook Azriel had gained some information about. Just a notebook and you could leave. 

Taking one more step, you almost missed it. The soft click of a trap locking into place. Your breathing all but stopped, eyes flickering around the room trying to glean any information about what just happened. Nothing. Listening even harder you could vaguely hear the sound of someone else’s breathing and that was enough to send a jolt of fear through you. You were truly trapped. Thinking only a second longer than necessary, you moved your foot off the loose floorboard. Deciding that the trap would be better than whoever else you heard in the room. 

The dart that shot out from the wall across from you was easy enough to dodge but the net that swept you off your feet took you by complete surprise. Your sword had slipped from your hand in your shock and you started to struggle against the rope cage. Something sharp dug into your arm and you cried out. The room instantly seemed to tilt on its head as your eyes fell shut. 

Your head was pounding when your eyes finally opened. Shooting up as the events from before caught up with you again. 

When your eyes finally opened again, you were unsure of how much time had passed. Only aware of the sting in your shoulders from where they were pinned above your head. Willing your eyes to focus you made out two figures standing in front of you. 

“Well good morning.” The shorter female said to you. “Thought I’d heard someone sniffing around. Didn’t think it would be anyone other than those two bastards.” She chuckled and you tried to pull against the chains. The pain that shot through you only made you cry out again. 

“I think we better let them know what happens when they poke their noses in other courts' business.” 

You didn’t have a chance to feel relief from being let out of those chains. You were pushed onto a blood splattered table. The female coming up behind you. She pulled the long blade from her side and waved it in front of your face. 

“Such a shame.” She muttered mostly to herself. You went to leap at her before two strong sets of hands pinned you back down. The cold metal trailed over your shoulders and sheer terror ripped through you. 

It was agony. The blade is far too dull to be making contact with anything let alone your delicate wings. You were thrashing around, the hands of your captors barely able to pin you down. Screams were flowing freely from your mouth, tangling with curses. Blood was caked under your nails, both yours and from the few good swipes you have managed to get in as their grip tightened on you. You tried to block out the pain, tried to ignore the way your entire body was drowning in it. Breathing hurts. The sickening thud against the floor told you all you needed to know. Your wings were gone. Your screams continued as the pain still coursed through every nerve. The blood would not stop. That slightly herbal smell in the air told you what was on those blades, faebane. A new wave of panic coursed through you. With the faebane you wouldn’t heal. You would bleed out before it wore off. You were going to bleed out in the middle of this gods damned house and no one would know until it was too late. 

Calm down. Think. You tried to tell yourself but as your vision started to darken around the edges you couldn’t stop the panic that was threatening to take you under. 

So you did the only thing you could think of. You stopped thrashing. Stopped screaming. Tucked that pain into a little part of you to make it seem like you had passed out. It wasn’t far off from how you felt. The pain threatened to pull you under. But you willed yourself to Stay awake even as you close your eyes. Rhys would have been able to tell something was off. 

Your captors said something you couldn’t quite fully make out but the slamming of a door mixed with their sickening laughter fading let you know they were no longer in the house. Forcing your eyes back open, you gathered the strength to reach a hand to your mangled back. Shaky hand reaching to inspect the full scope of damage. The damage that the faesbane was preventing from healing. When you pulled your hand away from your back you knew it wasn’t going to be that easy. They came away sticky and red and you had to force your vision to stop swirling. 

The house was eerily quiet. Until a flurry of grunts and cries reached your ears. You knew that voice. Azriel. At least you could see him one last time. It might even be worth it just to see his face before it all faded away. 

“y/n” He all but screamed into the room. You let out a meek response and you heard his unusually heavy footsteps freeze. A cry was pulled from his lips and you forced your eyes to focus on him.

“I knew you would find me” Your eyes were so heavy. 

“No. Stay awake,” You could barely register the sob that broke through his body. “You have to stay awake for me sweet girl.”

You tried your best but you could feel your eyelids screaming in protest. Begging you to just go to sleep. His shadows were wrapping around you, trying to keep pressure on your wounds. 

“Rhys and Cassian are going to be here any second now. You have to be awake when they get here.” Not good enough. You could almost hear the gears in his brain as he searched for the next thing to say. 

“I remember the first time I ever saw you.” His voice so much closer now, close enough that he took your hand in his. The pressure makes your eyes widen a little bit. He swam in and out of your vision, black spots beginning to take over. 

“You had just gotten into a fight. I didn’t see what started it, just came running when Rhys told me he saw it happening.” You blinked unfocused up at him. Trying your  best to remember. “We were all ready to jump in and protect you but you had the assholes on the ground by the time we all got there.” He laughed. The sound warming your body, when had it gotten so cold? “You managed to put three full grown Illyrian soldiers on their ass in a matter of minutes. Managed to smile at us as we showed up.” He paused 

“Wanna be next?” You rasped out. You could make out his smile through the haze. 

“The first thing you ever said to me was you seeing if you should kick our asses too. You weren’t scared of us, you weren’t, aren’t, scared of anything.” 

“That’s not true.” It was a fight to get the words out. Your voice sounded far away. “Azriel, I have to tell you something.” 

“No.” He all but growled. “You’ll tell me when we get back home.” 

You used the little bit of strength you had left to raise your arm to his face. He didn’t flinch at the blood left there. “I love you. I’ve loved you for years now.” There. You had finally said it. Your eyes had gotten too heavy to keep them open any longer. 

“Please. Just a little longer, sweetheart.” You couldn’t honor the request. Couldn’t fight the screaming muscles as your eyes flickered closed. Everything faded away as you drifted off to sleep. 

It felt like flying. Soaring high above everyone and everything. The pain that had been running through your body didn’t stop the moment my eyes closed, but even a little bit of reprieve was better than nothing. You would have let out a sigh of relief if you could have, but it didn’t seem like you had any control over your lungs at the moment. It was too confusing to try to figure out exactly why. 

Closing your eyes, you could almost feel a thread slipping over you. It was warm and letting go of it seemed so wrong. Your mind tried to grab onto it, hold it tighter but it was no use. Like trying to catch a bar of soap in the shower. Slipping out of your mind the harder you held on. It faded away and the screaming building in my throat got stuck as the last bit of feeling slipped away into nothingness. 

✦✦✦

The next moments were some of the worst of his life. Azriel watched your eyes flicker shut. Screaming at Rhys to hurry up. Begging the gods, anyone that would listen, to keep your heart beating. A heart he still heard the faint rhythm of. That was the hope he had to cling to. Not the ribbons carved out of your back. Not the way you felt so much lighter in his hold. No he could only focus on the fact that you were still alive in his arms. 

So he counted each heartbeat. The words echoing around his head. I love you. He hadn't even gotten the chance to say it back. He would scream it from the highest mountain if it would keep you here with him. Almost there. Rhys’ voice rang through his head. She doesn’t have a lot of time. Please. Azriel sent the scene in front of him and he heard the frantic buzz in Rhys’ mind, speeding up to get to her. Azriel was already tearing through the house to get you to where he could winnow but the damned wards were surrounding the house farther than he could get you to and he was afraid to fly with you in your current condition. He would need Rhys here to break the wards. 

Azriel was too caught up in his thoughts to see the minor wounds on you starting to heal. Fading to nothing but pink marks. The larger ones were finally starting to clot. But he was too caught up in the flood of grief that was circling him, he could have drowned in it but he had to hold out. He had to hope that she was coming back. Azriel didn’t think he would survive her being gone. 

The commotion outside let him know his brothers had finally arrived. He almost let out a sigh of relief. Almost. If it didn’t feel like his heart was outside of his body right now. Still listening to the faint sound in your chest. Still beating. It was the only thing holding him back from losing it completely. 

Rhys and Cassian caught up with him and he fought the urge to bite Rhys’ head off as he slipped your unconscious form into his arms. He couldn’t help but wince at the way you looked so frail covered in your own blood. He had never seen either of his brothers so pale before. He thanked whatever gods that he hadn't already cursed when Rhys was finally able to winnow you all back to Velaris. 

Madja had to all but throw him out of the room when she started to get to work. “I can’t heal anything with your shadows flying all over the place.” the old healer barked at him. He was about to argue back before he caught Rhys’ eyes, the small shake of his brother's head left him storming out of the room. He didn’t go further than the door frame. Unable to look away as  he watched Madja’s deft hands attempt to fix your back. He spent hours outside in the hallway. Practically wearing a path in the floorboards from his pacing. His wings were flared out beside him. He tried his hardest to reign them in. Their weight felt wrong against his back, the same way you had felt so wrong in his arms from your lack of wings. How he wishes he could have gotten to you sooner. How he wishes he could have spent more time carving up the monsters that did this to you. He doesn’t regret getting you out of there, the exact opposite. Madja had said that even a few minutes more and the blood loss would have been too great. His heart ached in a way he never imagined at the thought of what could have happened. 

Cassian finally walked out of the room. Shoulders hunched and wings dangerously close to sweeping across the ground. He looked as exhausted as Azriel felt. 

“You should go in. She’s not waking up anytime soon but you should be the first one she sees.” Was all Cassian said as he passed Azriel. He didn’t hesitate before he walked back into the room and the relief he felt at seeing you was instantaneous. Someone had thought to clean you up. The blood that covered your skin gone, the metallic scent being the only reminder it was even there in the first place. 

----------------

Your eyes shot open. A yelp left your lips and you shot up off the surface you were laying on. Warm hands wrapped around your arm and you tried to push them off. 

“I’m here. You’re safe. It’s just me.” Azriel’s voice soothed your rising panic. Safe. You let your surroundings sink in then. The soft mattress underneath you. The familiar feeling of your blankets against your skin. Your body relaxed slightly until your memories started flooding back to you. Instinctually, you went to flex your wings. Your whole body screams in protest and it really begins to dawn on you. 

“So it wasn’t a bad dream.” You sniffled, wanting nothing more than to disappear from those intense hazel eyes. Eyes that held nothing but pain and guilt as they looked at you. 

“I’m so sorry… we should have never let you go by yourself.” He tried to pull you against his chest and released you like you had burned him when you flinched at the contact. 

“I want to see.” He froze at your words. No further explanation was needed. A small rational part of your mind knows that you should focus on healing, focus on the fact that you had lived. But you needed to see with your own two eyes that your wings were no longer there. 

Azriel opened his mouth like he was going to protest but quickly shut it. Instead, he held out a hand for you to grab. You did so and rose on wobbly legs. 

He led you to the floor length mirror across the room. His hand not leaving yours as you took in your appearance. 

White hot shame filled your body. Your wings had been one of the biggest testaments to your strength. The fact that you could still fly as even a half-illyrian female was one of your biggest sources of pride. Proof that you had survived. Now, as you turned to get a better look at your back, you balked at the angry marks that took up over half of your back. The stitches still holding the angry looking skin together. The sob left your body before you could even stop it. Azriel’s hand in yours was the only thing keeping you upright. Legs refusing to hold you up anymore.

When Azriel turned to face you, you found yourself unable to look him in the eyes. Your own lingering on the floor. A gentle finger under your chin tipped your face up to meet his. 

“Talk to me, pretty girl? What’s going on in that head of yours.” You could only shake your head. Unable to find the words. Your brain is so distracted that you didn’t even fully process the name he just called you. 

“Do you want to go lay back down?” Nodding, he helped you walk over to your bed again. But this time he crawled in behind you. 

“Is this okay?” He asked before he got any closer. 

“Please don’t go.” Was all you could respond with. Not caring how desperate it might have made you sound.” 

“Of course not. I’ll stay right here until you tell me otherwise.” He sat right next to you and you let out a heavy sigh before you laid your head on his lap. 

“Why did you stay? I don’t see any of the others.” You questioned after a few minutes of silence. Your eyes were starting to get heavy again but you wanted to talk to him more. 

“We all decided that it should be me here when you woke up. Not like I left the room anyways.” He said softly. 

“Why?” Was the only thing you could think to say. 

“Because I love you too,” His hand had started to brush over your hair, fingers combing through the knots. “And you love me.” You couldn’t think of anything else to say to that. He continue on,

“You seemed so…so calm when I got to you” His voice was barely above a whisper now, my ears struggling to hear him. 

“Because I knew you would find me.” You said as you allowed yourself to drift into a peaceful sleep. 

[laroserie]

— Various x-men characters dating a non-mutant!reader

— characters ; Scott Summers, Peter Maximoff, Kurt Wagner, Hank McCoy

— version with others characters ; not out yet

— warning ; no particular tw. talk about self estimee and doubt. (as always author has not started reading the comics and their knowledge come from the different xmen cartoon and my hazy memories of the film <3) ( also no cartoon gif for peter because i couldn't find any ... is he even in any of the xmen cartoons ), author decided that Peter has self-confidence issues, also Peter part kinda slide tracked and has more about Peter and his struggle than him dating reader whose a human ... sorry! (his part is also a bit short ...)

— Scott Summers

Scott has no particular qualm around you being a regular human, he loves you just as you are, and nothing can change that. That said, Scott cannot help himself but be, patronising at time. In his mind, you being a human just make you be at risks, you can't defend yourself if you get attacked, by others humans or mutants. He doesn't view you as weak, but, he know how fleeting life is. He isn't the greatest at expressing his feelings, and notably his worry for you.

He will also be more protective than if he was with a mutant. And it show in him being at first very against you befriending any others x-men, he very much care for most of them and he loves you very much, but he doesn't want to have those two part of his life mix up. He doesn't want you to get in dangers because of his job, but he also doesn't want you to possibly endanger one of his mission, he wasn't capable of choosing between you and one of his mission. Not to say, you are as or more important than his mission, but he was responsibilities as a X-Men and he cannot forget about them. But that said, with enough asking and pleading, making him crack and let you meet his friends and fellow X-Men.

Talking about you interacting with mutants, Scott will not let any remarks about you - well not being one - slide. He knows and understand why his friends may feel wary of humans, he get it, but you are different. You are quite literally dating him - a mutant, it couldn't make any sense for you to be against them. Scott may let it slide the first time actually, but anymore than that, and he's making them do extra session in danger room - or they aren't allowed in it, depending on who.

In general, there isn't that much of a different between how he treat his mutant or non-mutant partner, he just will be more protective and worried for them. He doesn't feel particularly insecure in your relationship - because of his mutation or your lack of mutation.

Again, he doesn't have any problems with you not being a mutant - he more so has problem being a mutant, not in general of course, but in your relationship yes. Peter can't really give an answer as to why, but if he had to guess it was probably due to this father, and the fact that he didn't want to do anything like his father did, to you. The worst is, he know damn well he isn't anything like him but he can't help but think that way.

He feels like he's going to mess your relationship up, because of what he is. He try to play it off as if it was nothing, but it's a feeling that lingers in the back of his mind often. He never truly wished to be a regular human before, and he still doesn't, but he just want your relationship to be more normal. Which isn't really possible. Peter knows that, he also knows that you don't care, about that kind of thing.

He can mask his doubts and awful self-confidence with his quirky attitude, he can fool most people pretty easily - expect you. At some point, it get to point, where you have to sit down with Peter and try to have a conversation about it, at first he will just act dumb and pretend he doesn't get what you are talking about, but his facade cracks relatively fast.

You listen, his fears and doubts. You comfort him, and assure him, that everything is fine, you reassure him that weither your relationship is 'normal' or not it's the last of your problem. You love him, he loves you and that all that matter in your eyes.

Now, Kurt could be the one that has the most difficulty dating someone that is not a mutant. He could be scared to hurt you more than anything. He's stressing out about doing or saying the worst thing, that will just break everything. One of the reason why he is friend, with his friends is because they share at least one thing - they can all relate on one crucial part of their identity - them being mutant, it's one thing that link them all together and make it at least a little bit easier to connect. You lacking that, make it hard for him. He still loves you all the same of course, but he feels like not being able to share something so crucial is sad.

So he desperately try to make it up in some way, he looks everything he can about your interests to be able to share that with you, everytime you share something about your interests Kurt will make mental note of it. And he will share a lot about what interest him in return. If you speak an another language that he doesn't know, he'll try to learn it, after all what is better than learning the language of your lover! Kurt can even teach you some german if you want to!

He wants something to link the two of you together even more. It's something he heavily crave. To be linked to you, by more than just, your love for each others.

Kurt may feel insecure at time, that you may leave him for well, a regular human, that isn't blue, has five fingers on each hands - he will try to keep it to himself, but he isn't really good at that. His insecurity just overflow and he end up offhandedly asking you while you are hanging out, if you could prefer to be dating a human rather than him. Obviously, you tell him that you don't, and ask where did this idea came from. He feels reluctant to admit as to why he asked. He feels, ashamed ? After seeing your reaction, he feels a bit silly, and even more when you comfort him and tell him that you very much prefer and could always choose to date him more than anyone else just because they are human.

On a more happy note Kurt loves seeing how amazed you are by his mutation, you never really were around mutants before - there isn't actually a ton of opportunity to meet mutants and to know that they are mutants, even if antis mutant politicians like to make people believe the contrary - most humans he met, weren't exactly thrilled by his, but you are the exactly opposite. Even after being together for a while and getting used to his mutation, there is still this curiosity and shine in your eyes when he teleport for example.

He is by far, the most chill about your relationship and you not being a mutant while he is. Well, that is if we are talking about Hank, after he accepted his entire mutation and all, which we are, Hank pre-self acceptance is different deal.

But once, Hank is settled as a scientific and has member of the X-Men, and has fully accepted his mutation, he doesn't personally really care. But sadly, a lot of people seemingly do and that's one thing that annoy him. The worst is it come from both fellow mutants, even his friends and colleagues sometime! And from regular humans. He doesn't really get why people care about him dating a non-mutant or you dating him - a mutant.

He personally try to not let it get to him, and if it does he will do everything but make you suffer because of it. It most often will result in him shutting himself in his lab for a bit of time, to calm down.

And like others, he feels like he needs to protect you because, you are so ... weak in his eyes, not in a bad way of course ! But in comparison to him you are so small and fragile. This cause Hank to usually like putting his arms around you, around you waist or on your back, to show you that he is there, and to show people around that you are his, and that they shouldn't try to hurt you in anyway.

[lesbianphan]

The Myth of Sisyphus and PHILosophy (lol) - a brief essay on two nerds playing a game that might not be that deep but hey who's gonna stop me from pushing this boulder up the hill of writing this?

Disclaimer: it's finally my turn to use my useless degree that included a lot of literary analysis for something extremely important to society: analyzing Dan and Phil content!!! yay!!! This is about to be incredibly nerdy and waffly, but like what else are you doing with your time anyway on phannie tumblr?? (pls read it, I just reread Camus for this for the first time in years okay I'm dedicated to my craft)

"The struggle itself towards the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy." Albert Camus

As a part of Camus' essays on absurdist philosophy, The Myth of Sisyphus deals with the pointlessness of existence, through retelling the story of the greek myth about the titular character who, as a punishment for defying Death, was condemned to spend eternity pushing a boulder up a hill just to watch it fall back down. That may sound bleak, such is the futile nature of getting up every day and doing tasks, after all.

However, that's not really what the essay conveys. As the quotation provided in the beginning shows, Camus' takeaway about the myth of Sisyphus isn't about how easy it would be to take the option of not engaging at all with the repetitive tasks that make life what it is, or even focusing on how disappointing this pointlessness is. It's about how the journey of getting up everyday and motivating yourself to hit the peak of the hill is all there is to life, really. The absurd conclusion is, ultimately, that pushing the boulder up the hill everyday is what true revolt against the senselessness of the universe is. If there is no reason, we make the reason by climbing up with our rock everyday.

We choose to be happy every day and appreciate our rock, our hill, our existence as a whole. We choose to believe Sisyphus is happy, and, as disappointing at it may sound at first, it's worth it to live your existence, as long as you decide to appreciate your present more than your future (the destination, that elusive peak of the hill).

In Dan's words, you decide to have "just one good night" together every night on tour, you appreciate the journey of climbing out of that mental health hole again. You climb up that hill again and again, because it's worth it, and there are things - bigger than yourself or your personal boulder or even your destination, - that are worth fighting for every day. You embrace the void, and have the courage to exist today, not tomorrow atop the hill.

As Camus' Myth of Sisyphus was, admitedly, one of the inspirations behind We're All Doomed (and it shows!), it makes it even more intriguing to inquire about how much of their reactions to that particular game about Sisyphus informs their perspectives on the world and their personal philosophies.

As a disclaimer, I must add: I don't claim to know Dan and Phil personally, and I only have acess to the parts of them they decide to share, the performing side of them. So, quite obviously, I can be fully off the mark on this one. Still I think it's interesting to dive into, if not for accuracy, at least for better understanding of the personas they portray online, and how their worldviews bleed into it.

The first big point a lot of people brought to the table is the shift in Dan's philosophy ever since writing and performing We're All Doomed and (most likely) a lot of therapy and work on himself over the years. Gone are the days of existential crises being treated as a joke, or mental health in general being discussed without care for what the audience may take from it. During the video, it's quite apparent that he tries very hard to mantain that voice of reason (sometimes breaking it out of frustration, which is fair!), to somehow guide us into an understanding of what this philosophy means to him personally and to his self-proclaimed magum opus WAD.

This is relevant, of course, insofar as this becomes the thesis of the video, silly gameplay and jokes aside. So I couldn't not mention it here, as it's extremely noticeable and commendable of him to now have a different kind of perspective towards the topic of mental health, in this more mature era of their content. You can tell it's relevant to him to try to get the point of the myth across, in a way that tells his audience, as much as it tells himself, that giving up isn't a choice. You must keep pushing that boulder and you must believe that Sisyphus is happy, and so will you be during that journey up the hill. Even when it falls down again and you meet frustration, you pick yourself back up and keep trying to enjoy the present once again.

Secondly, regarding Dan's behavior during the gameplay, it's notable that he gets extremely frustrated when the boulder falls down (who wouldn't?). However, he always tries to catch it and put it back in the path upwards, instead of throwing his hands and giving up like Phil seems to do. This shows, very loosely, how he handles frustration in his own life: trying to fix things and get them right on path again. It's sometimes the most difficult choice to make, but it's extremely corageous to just keep trying in face of extreme frustration. We've seen it all over gaming videos, but also on his own personal projects getting shut down, and Dan still insisting on carrying on creating things that are personal to him, even in face of rejection.

Phil, however, seemed to give up out of frustration extremely easily, so much so that Dan kept pointing it out how he'd let go of the controls and let it happen. It might not mean much, but since he himself claims he gives up on things that are too difficult, it might just be an aspect of his personality to literally let go in face of things he perceives as impossible to achieve.

It is also notable that when he made a mistake, no matter how competitive they usually are on the surface, Phil decided to ask Dan for help, or try to tag out entirely and hand it over. This may not only be related to frustration, but also to knowing how to ask for help, and also a belief that Dan is "the strongest one out of both of us" and he will be there always to help (quite adorable). Dan's tenacity in front of difficult situations is a great complement to Phil's anxious eagerness to hand over the controls when things get overwhelming.

It's interesting to point out how their personal worldview influenced their gameplay as well. Dan was focused, sharp, driven to get to the top of the mountain by keeping in complete control of the boulder at all times. He held on tight to the challenges and kept going, and he wasn't afraid to run back and catch himself enough to try again. Phil's style showed something very interesting about him that is notable in gaming videos in particular: Phil's propensity for making little goals and celebrating the little things in the path to a goal.

Getting through one obstacle that was once difficult is enough to make Phil seem content with his progress. He celebrates every little step of the journey and, in that way, it's easier for him to appreciate it naturally. He's focused on the little tasks more than the big picture, and that makes the experience more enjoyable. His goals shift, of course, as they progress through the level, and the difficulty ramps up. Even so, he's still more likely to point out that's the farthest they've gotten and, hey look at this ramp, let's get through this ramp and then we've won, because that's my goal right now, and that's enough to make me happy in the present.

This counterbalances Dan's more bleak outlook wonderfully as well. While Dan is focused on making it to the top of the hill, and gets extremely discouraged seeing there's a lot more ahead they'll never get to experience, Phil's view is that they got through that one challenge and, surely, next time they'll get through one more, and so on and so forth. Focusing on smaller things is, ultimately, a good way of finding happiness in the process of pushing up that boulder.

Moreover, Phil's brief comment about how you could "make up little stories in your head" is also extremely telling of the kind of person he is. As Camus' philosophy claims: the only way to live with an absurd world is by living through it and learning what it means to be happy in a world that doesn't make sense. In Phil's mind, a bearable way to get through the harrowing experience of every day existence is making up stories, which matches up with his creative mind. Art and creation are indeed things that can make life worth living, and it seems that even subconsciously, that's the path he'd choose against the pointlessness of repetition. The joy of creation is, certainly, and extremely human and beautiful way to find meaning in life.

The most interesting point I'd like to raise, though, is how they got through that game together: as much as Dan accused Phil of distracting him, it was interesting to see that he didn't notice that's entirely the point. The boulder falling down is nothing compared to the stories we share, the conversations we make. What is important is the journey you take, and hearing about your best friend's weird school inter-sports anecdotes, even if you have to start over because you got distracted.

And that's entirely the point I'd like to leave this of with: pushing up that boulder is only worth it if you learn to live, if you learn to love, if you learn to enjoy the present moment, instead of focusing on that ever elusive destination. Therefore, what makes not only the video interesting, but also the game bearable at all, is their interaction with each other. Much like in life as partners, Dan and Phil would, obviously, climb that hill together. They would find the joy in the little moments together, laugh, yell, get frustrated, pick each other back up again in moments of frustration, and keep going up that hill together.

The only way to live is if one imagines Sisyphus happy. The only way to exist is if you decide that, no matter what, you'll create your own meaning. The only way is to find joy in the now instead of later. The only way to make those grueling day to day tasks happy and fun, is by choosing hapiness. Dan and Phil have, in every sense, decided to keep climbing up that hill of existence together. It may be slow and clumsy and loud at times, but it's their own experience. Ultimately, the only way to experience that gaming content is by imagining Dan and Phil are happy to make it for us, and that we can all share a little bit of our hill in moments of laughter and community. That's what makes life worth it in the end.

A/N: this may be the weirdest thing I've ever done, pls accept me for who I am, thank!

[paradiseprincesss]

Ooo I have been loving ALL your fics and your robert fischer one gave me an idea… the reader is a call girl who grew up poor, he hires us and after a while slowly falls in love with her and feels guilty and happy ending for both of my sad babies🥹

pov - robert fischer x reader

hi anon! I'M SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG but i love this - robert fischer will always be a soft character in my mind, i feel like he's just...like that. i just feel like he's a sad and lonely guy with the sweetest heart - i need a robert fischer in my life fr.

summary: as a call girl, your life was chaotic. ever since you were a little girl you had struggled with both self acceptance and self love, but you suddenly meet a client who changes your perspective of everything you thought you knew.

warnings: smut 18+ minors dni!!, oral (fem!receiving), p in v, kissing, swearing, mentions of toxic household, daddy issues, mentions of escorting/prostitution lol

…to be loved is to be changed.

you never know when you'll meet the one that changes everything - fate is funny that way. you don't know when they'll show up in your life, maybe you already know them, maybe you don't.

"god, you have no idea what it's like for me! i was struggling to pay my tuition. i'm doing what i have to do to get by, mom!" you scream, tears streaming down your face.

"then go get a job," she yelled back at you, "being some old mans escort is not a real job!"

"i'm- jesus, i'm a call girl it's- it's just different, okay? and it pays well. i can't continue to pay for college if i don't do this. you know a regular job doesn't pay shit." you say, your hands trembling as you argued with your mom.

the one figure in your life that was supposed to show you unconditional love wasn't there for you; but you didn't hold any animosity towards her. she was struggling as much as you were. did.

not anymore.

you hated this - fighting and arguing with her. it hurt you deeply. but, you did what you had to do to get by. your father wasn't in the picture, and your mother worked two jobs but that was barely enough to make ends meet.

your whole childhood was tumultuous, you grew up in a home with a single parent, the other one gone without a trace. you didn't know love growing up, and honestly, it fucked up your perception of the world - of the word love.

you put your all into school; it was the only thing that distracted you from your home life, and you were good at it. you managed to get pretty good grades in high school, no less than an A- in any subject you took, and post-graduation, you got into a pretty good college in your area.

you had moved out the day you turned eighteen, eager and excited to go out and blossom in life; but reality hit you, hard.

rent was expensive, and paying for college? god, that was a struggle in itself. you worked the odd job here and there, whether it was a cashier job or waitressing job, but neither paid enough. you did a little online research and came across escorting. the only thing that really enticed you was the paycheque - and my goodness was it a hefty one.

you kept this life of yours a secret - but you told your mom the truth earlier when she came by to visit you. she was surprised to see the apartment you were living in; decked out and lavish. she'd asked you where you had gotten the money to pay for this from, and you told her what you were doing.

turns out your mother wasn't too happy about her daughter being a glorified escort, and after arguing with you, she slammed the door in your face, which left you a sobbing mess.

but at least you had money now, right?

after scoring a position with a lucrative company which you couldn't disclose for...certain reasons, you received your first job. then you booked another, and another, and soon, you were a top money maker there.

with a face like that and the body you had - you were not short on cash, let's just say that. you were getting paid thousands just to make appearances with rich men - and getting paid tens of thousands to sleep with them.

as much as you loved the cash, you were miserable on the inside. money got boring after a while, it was just another part of your unexciting, depressing, melancholy life.

diamonds and designer bags couldn't fix the hole in your heart, they couldn't fix the emptiness that lingered within you.

if there was someone who understood this feeling better than anyone else - it was robert fischer.

sure, he never grew up poor or struggled to have money, but he knew damn well that money couldn't solve all your problems. in fact, having a lot of money came with more problems, he thought.

robert didn't know love - it was unfamiliar to him. none of his ex-girlfriends loved him, they just loved his money. they didn't care about him, they just cared about cashing in.

and every time he broke it off with them, they would tell him "don't leave, i miss you" - but he knew better than that. they didn't miss shit but the money, designer bags, and the lavish lifestyle.

after a particularly agonizing day at work, robert came home to his penthouse; head clouded with stress. honestly, it had been months since he had sex - been forever since he just felt loved or had any form of intimacy.

he craved it real bad.

so, he sighed as he dialled the number on his phone, waiting as the line rung quietly. quickly, someone answered and he put in his request - "i'll give you fifteen grand to send over your best girl," was all he said over the phone, quickly giving his address over afterwards.

and that is the story of how you ended up as robert fischers personal call girl - but that was just the beginning.

when you first met robert, you were pleasantly surprised. usually, your clientele consisted of old, rich men who were (at least in your opinion) disgusting. however, robert on the other hand was handsome, young, kind and rich on top of all that.

he was your best client thus far, and you were his favourite girl - not that he had any other girls, anyway. he paid you way more than any other man did, and he tipped generously on top of that.

soon enough, you were only seeing robert - exclusively. for work reasons of course. and he tried to tell himself that, too. that this was just sex. it didn't mean anything, right?

wrong.

he pushed you down onto the bed gently, running his hands all over your body while his lips caught yours in a deep kiss. today, you were waiting for him in his penthouse wearing a baby pink, lacy babydoll with matching pink panties and some stockings.

robert damn near lost his mind when he saw you in your lingerie, his cock was straining against his pants the second he laid eyes on you - sprawled out on his bed, biting your lip teasingly.

"fuck, i love you in pink." he groaned against your lips - but what he was really trying to tell you was "i love you."

he positioned you so that you were now sat up against the headboard of his bed, propped up against the plush pillows looking like a princess. slowly, he took his hand up to your thigh, blue eyes still locked with yours, and teasingly started to take your stockings off. he did it excruciatingly slow with the other one, too.

once your stockings were off, he looked at you with admiration. he truly thought you were the prettiest thing he had ever seen. ethereal. "can i?" he asked softly, his hands now trailing down your inner thighs, dangerously close to your clothed heat.

"m-mhm." you hum with a small nod, trying not to lose your mind. keeping your composure around him was proving to become more and more difficult every time.

he hooked his finger into the waistband of the tiny, lacy, pink thong and pulled it down your legs, groaning softly at the sight of your cunt all soaked for him.

"you're soaked. i can see it." he said lowly, and it takes every fucking ounce of self restraint you have in your body not to moan at the way he says it.

"y-yeah. s'cause of you, robbie." you say softly as he spreads your legs open, his mouth watering at the sight. he peppered kisses onto the insides of your thighs, teasingly kissing everywhere except where you so desperately needed him to kiss you.

"please." you whisper, and that was all he needed to hear before he was lapping up your pretty pussy. he licked a stripe up your cunt and you let out a desperate moan at the feeling of his mouth on you.

he continued to eat you out as if it was the last thing he'd ever do, making your head spin. you were moaning his name over and over, begging him to let you cum on his face as he sucked on your clit.

he took one of his fingers and slowly started to pump it in and out of your soaking hole. "oh fuck, i-i need you inside of me." you pleaded, feeling yourself getting closer and closer to release.

"only if you cum on my tongue, baby." he says between your legs, and you started to gasp and moan as you felt your orgasm approach you at full speed.

"i'm- gonna cum!" you desperately cry, feeling yourself cream all over his face as he took every last drop of it.

he sat up wiping his mouth and chin, glistening with your slick, and smiled at you dopily - he was in heaven.

“lay back on the bed for me, princess.” he commanded softly, and you oblige immediately. as you find comfort within the huge, king-sized bed and soft pillows, he unbuttoned his white dress shirt and undid his tie, taking it off while you watched like a predator stalking its prey.

next came his slacks, which he was rushing to get out of. as his cock sprung free from his boxers, your body felt like it was going into overdrive. robert got between your legs and took hold of your hips before lining his cock up with your drooling entrance.

slowly, he pushed in and the both of you let out sinful sounds. sex never had any meaning for you - it was just your profession, you didn’t know any different. but when he was inside you, when you let him into you - things felt...different.

robert was in way too deep to get out now (both figuratively and literally), and he slowly started to thrust himself in and out of you at a slow pace. one thing you noticed about robert, especially when you guys were fucking, was that he never broke eye contact.

nobody had ever fucked you so sensually before, let alone with such care. he fucked into you gently, the both of you moaning and breathing heavily, and he got lost in your pretty eyes.

he loved you - and he knew it was wrong.

it was the one thing you shouldn’t do when hiring a call girl - fall in love with her. he knew he shouldn’t fall in love with a woman who’s literal job was to pretend that she loved you and fuck you right, but he couldn’t help it.

robert - like you - didn’t know what love was until he felt you. until he knew you.

“f-fuck, faster robbie.” you whispered, breathless and feeling almost out of touch with reality with how good he felt inside you - it was like he was made for you.

“god, you’re so fucking tight. you- ugh, you feel so good, baby.” robert moaned, and you could almost hear the desperation in his voice. “i’m already about to cum, jesus-“ he stammered, voice strained.

“then cum, ah-.” you urged, wrapping your arms around him in a way that was a little too intimate for it to just be part of your job.

“how much extra do you want, ten grand?” he panted as he fucked your pretty pussy, feeling you tighten up around his hard cock.

“wha- robbie, what?” you try to talk properly through the pleasure he was bringing you; it was overwhelming. you weren’t sure why he was bringing up payments and money now of all times, this had been discussed already at the beginning of…whatever this agreement was.

“how much to make you mine? please - i love you.” he said, losing himself in the feeling of you.

you felt your mouth go dry as the words fell from his lips, and in a panic you struggle from underneath him, trying your hardest to push him away.

“wait- wait, stop-“ you say all flustered and panicked. this wasn’t supposed to happen - this should never happen between you and your clients.

he stops as soon as you say the word, and you backup into the the headboard of the bed anxiously, grabbing the blankets to cover yourself up as soon as he had pulled out.

you had never known love before, so when you heard those words, it sent you into an abysmal spiral.

“i-i’m sorry, i just-“ he stammered, the two of you looking each other awkwardly, and robert felt his heart break in two silently.

“don’t apologize, it’s my fault.” you sigh, looking down.

“no, cmon- i shouldn’t have said that.” he said back, and you glanced at him for a second - he looked like he was hurting. like it physically hurt him to tell hear you turn him down in a sense.

you felt a tear run down your cheek, and you wiped it away, already embarrassed enough. this had never happened in front of a client before.

was robert just a client, though?

before you had a chance to answer your own question, robert answered it for you. he took his hand out, gentle and soft, and wiped the tears away from your cheek.

“what’s going on?” he spoke softly, and you just shook your head, avoiding all eye contact.

“i- please, i’m so embarrassed. i’m sorry. you don’t need to pay me for today.” you whisper.

he shakes his head, and grabs a robe that he had draped over the ottoman in front of his bed, and quickly threw it on. you stayed with the covers pulled up over your chest and the rest of your body, watching him carefully.

he approaches you cautiously, and without another word he pulls you into his embrace - warm and inviting, just like him.

it felt like the missing piece in your chaotic, incomplete puzzle that you called your life.

words failed you in that moment, but it felt foreign. the feeling of being loved, being comforted, being vulnerable was new to you. you didn’t know such feelings could exist - at least, you grew up thinking that anyway.

"i'm really sorry, i shouldn't have said that." he said softly, petting your hair gently. "no, it's- fine. i-i don't know why i reacted like that." you reassured him, not quite knowing the reason behind your erratic behaviour.

"we don't have to continue, okay?" he reassures you in a soothing tone, and you let yourself fall into the feeling of his touch and embrace for a moment too long, before coming to your senses.

"t-thank you," you mumble, "i just don't think i'm in a good head space right now."

"and that's okay." he reassures you once again - he was really good at that. "why don't we just end todays session and i'll see you again next week, same time?"

"yeah, okay. i'm sorry, robbie." you murmur, and robert could feel his heart beating rapidly as you said his name like that - the name you called him.

after that, you had left in a rush (and felt super unprofessional about it), profusely apologizing for what had happened but he kept telling you that it was okay.

once you got back to your place, you ran a hot shower for yourself to collect your thoughts and calm yourself down. after that, you got into bed and fell asleep quickly, exhausted from the day you had.

the next morning, you woke up feeling groggy, and frankly - still super embarrassed from yesterday. cringing at your own actions, you felt like you just wanted to curl up into a ball and never show your face again.

why did you react like that? why did you have to make a scene? why did robert's confession throw you off so badly?

deep down, you knew the answers to these questions.

you reacted like that because you grew up around constant chaos and poverty, you didn't know what it was like to be cared for, to be loved. you made a scene because for someone who's never known love, facing the unknown was terrifying.

but why did robert's confession throw you off? why?

you sat there in bed, wondering. wondering to yourself why he would want you of all people - some call girl he ordered because he was bored. why wasn't he with some other girl who had come from money like him? come from class? why would he chose you?

in that moment, it went right over your head, but his confession threw you off because you didn't feel worthy. you didn't know how to trust - you couldn't see yourself the way robert saw you, after all.

suddenly, you heard your phone buzz beside you. looking a the notification, you found yourself shocked. you had received an e-transfer from robert of double the normal amount he was paying you.

your jaw dropped and you had to re-read the numbers in your account to really make sure this was real. in a state of shock, you look through your contacts and give him a call in the spur of the moment.

"hello?" his slightly raspy morning voice answered, and you felt your heart do a little flip at the sound of it - but you pushed it aside.

"hey, robert, it's me," you say, taking in a breath, "i...you didn't have to pay me, i told you."

he sighed on the other line, "no, i shouldn't have...told you what i did. i'm sorry, i...i've been thinking about it."

you stayed silent, unsure of what to say next, but he continued talking regardless. "can we talk? i'll pay you for your time."

"you don't have to do that, robert. and yes, yeah let's, um, talk." you say to him, and the two of you arrange to meet at his at three.

you get yourself ready, doing your hair in your favourite hair style and your makeup all glamorous, throwing on your favourite saint laurent heels with a matching satin mini dress.

you rush out the door, and hopped into your car, speeding off to his place. usually, he would send a driver out to yours, but you were off the clock. he insisted over the phone, but you urged him that you could drive and it was fine.

as soon as you got to the building of his penthouse, he buzzed you in and you made your way up the elevator. after knocking on the door, he opened it with a small smile on his face. he was wearing the usual - suit and tie, of course.

as he welcomed you in, he told you about the meeting he had at his office earlier that day - hence the whole suit and tie getup.

"anyways, i'm sure i'm boring you with the details about my work meeting." he says, laughing softly and you smile. "not at all, it's refreshing to hear you talk about other parts of your life besides...you know, the usual stuff we talk about."

he smiled back at you, but it seemed he was having trouble getting his words out - he didn't know how to tell you what he wanted to tell you.

"er, please know that, fuck- i just, i didn't mean to scare you away with what i said." he stammered, clearly flustered.

"...what did you mean, robert?" you ask meekly, avoiding eye contact. he slowly steps a little closer, closing the gap between the two of you.

"i have feelings for you." he says, voice strained out of sheer nervousness.

"don't say that," you sigh, "this- us, it isn't real. it's just like, playing pretend."

you so desperately wanted to say, "me too, i fell for you too," but your insecurities stopped you. even though you worked in a profession where you were paid to be pretty, paid to look good as arm candy, you felt inadequate all the time. you didn't feel pretty - you felt indifferent. sometimes, you didn't even know who you were.

there was a lot of baggage that came with you, but it was nothing that would ever scare robert off.

"i know what it's like to 'play pretend,'" he said, emphasizing his words with air quotations, "i've done that for the last ten years of my life - with every woman i've ever dated. they pretended to like me for me and not my money, and i pretended that i didn't see what they were really doing."

"you're literally paying me to sleep with you, robert. this is transactional." you say, trying to convince yourself into thinking that was the truth.

"god- it's not. it's not, you know it, i know it. we both know it." he exasperates, and you look away again as he continues. "i can feel it in the way you touch me, the way you look at me, the way you say my name, i can tell. and i know you can tell by the way i hold you, talk to you - the way i don't want anyone else but you."

as he confessed, you felt your cheeks go pink. you didn't realize that he was this much of a romantic - it was kinda cute. it was obvious that he was so serious about this, but you on the other hand...

you weren't too convinced. you had never received such attention, such care or such...love before.

"why are you lying to yourself?" his voice snapped you out of your anxious thoughts, and you finally found the courage to meet his gaze.

trying your hardest not to get lost in his ocean eyes, you manage to get a response out. "i-i don't know. i guess i just don't understand it. i don't understand how you could like, fall in love with someone who does...what i do."

he sighed softly, tilting your chin up with his finger, forcing you to meet his gaze once again. "let me help you understand, then."

one second you were trying to deny every lovey-dovey feeling you had for him - and the next his lips were on yours. it just happened so naturally.

in that moment, you could feel every insecurity, every anxious thought, every piece of pent up trauma and trust issues subside with him.

he wrapped his arms around your waist lovingly, holding you in his embrace as he kissed you softly.

you were off the clock, and so was he. neither of you were your personas anymore. you weren't just some call girl anymore (not that he ever saw you as just that), and he wasn't robert fischer of fischer morrow right now - he was just yours.

you were the first to pull away from the kiss, and you looked up at him with a small smile, which he returned.

"you have no idea how much i care about you." he whispered softly, "i wish you could see yourself in the way that i see you."

his words struck a chord for sure, and you felt yourself getting teary eyed again. "jesus, robert - stop making me cry." you laugh softly, trying to hold back the tears.

"i want to know who you are - not the usual work stuff. tell me about your life." he said softly, keeping you close.

and so you did - you did exactly that. that evening, you had spent the whole time getting to really know each other. from childhood memories to what you ate for breakfast that day - no parts left out. he told you about himself too, and finally, you felt safe.

you finally felt like the years of walls you had built up were gradually coming down, and all the baggage you accumulated over the years was slowly fading.

you looked over the terrace of your suite in your lace slip, taking in the beauty of the eiffel tower which you could see from your luxurious hotel room.

"s'pretty, just like you." robert says, wrapping his arms around you from behind, placing a soft kiss behind your ear. "good morning, mrs. fischer."

ah, that's right.

you were mrs. fischer now - newly married and happier than ever. after that fateful night in roberts penthouse, the two of you just clicked. it was fate, no - destiny. it was like something you had never known before, the pull between you two was on a metaphysical level, and for once, you didn't fight the fall.

now, nearly three years later, you were taking in the gorgeous view of paris in the early morning on your honeymoon.

your wedding was beautiful - private and intimate - but beautiful. it was just the way you imagined it would be; everything you dreamed of. robert had proposed to you a week after you graduated from your program in college, and the two of you were happily in love - still happily in love, and always would be happily in love.

you decided to quit your call girl job, as there was no longer a need to work anymore at all. robert covered all of your finances, never once did you ever pick up the bill with him. he supported you in everything that you did, always being there for you and showing up for you when you most needed him.

he never judged you, never belittled you, never made you doubt how much he loved you. it was like he had superpowers with the way he was able to permeate through all the past trauma you had. it didn't matter to him if you were working in the escort business before he came along; he simply didn't care.

your past is in the past for a reason, that wasn't you anymore. you were a different woman now. softer and no longer had her guard up constantly. sometimes, you felt like he knew you better than you knew yourself.

because he loved you for you. he taught you how to be grateful for yourself, to show up for yourself, to love yourself the way he loved you.

"i love you so much, honey. god, i love everything about you." he said softly, kissing down your neck, making you giggle.

"mm, i'd love to see me from your point of view." you say, taking in the breathtaking view of paris, and your new life.

[rougecreator1]

Hi ! m a little shy so sorry for talking in anon 😊I was wondering, after I saw you opend reneé request. If you would want to write about ReneéReader (fem, obviously)where Reneé ADHD and anxiety are a little too much and Reader comforts then

Swirling Thoughts ||

|| Renée Rapp x fem!reader

|| Warnings: reader & Renée getting drunk, Renée struggling with anxiety, first time writing for Renée, short drabble (no part 2), light swearing, slight homophobia

|| Summary: Renée's meeting reader's parents for the first time, safe to say she's nervous as shit. Reader helps her through it.

Requests open!

Started: May 12th

Finished: May 13th

~~~

You and Renée have been together for a few months now, the public didn't know and neither did either of your parents. You had kept your relationship pretty secretive. Knowing the kind of chaos that could come with revealing it. You had kept it so secret that no one even knew the two of you were associated with each other until you were ready for them to know.

You were famous for your own works, such as the various shows you'd acted in and the two songs you had released. Music wasn't your main focus, but after a single scene of you singing for a show aired... people begged for more. For you it was more of an extra cash grab that accidentally went more viral than you planned for; which was how you had caught the attention of Renée Rapp.

The two of you were currently laid entangled with each other on the couch, watching a movie in your apartment. Renée had suggested watching one of your older movies and every time you appeared on screen, the two of you would take a shot. So that's what you'd been doing for the last hour an a half.

By this point, you were drunkenly giggling. Head on Renée's shoulder as you looked into her eyes. She wasn't quite as drunk as you, but she was definitely there.

"What, baby?" She asked in a soft tone when she noticed your eyes on hers.

"Nothing~ you're just really pretty." You whispered, a faint pink hue formed on her cheeks when she heard you. She'd never get tired of hearing you compliment her.

"Mm? If I'm pretty what does that make you?" Renée flirts back, hand coming up to your cheek and giving it a gentle rub.

You simply shrugged at her question, not finding an answer to it which made Renée raise an eyebrow.

"Baby, you're fucking stunning." She tells you, now you were the one blushing. Then a thought came across your mind, you wanted to know what she would think of it but you didn't know if you guys were at that stage yet.

She noticed you were in thought but waited to see if you would continue it on your own. When you didn't she gave you a playful nudge, pulling you closer into her arms," What're you thinking about?"

You hesitate, taking another drink despite the fact that your character hadn't been on screen. Leading Renée to realize this was definitely a more serious conversation.

"Do you think we're ready to meet each other's parents?" You asked, you could see Renée's breath hitch as she also took another drink.

"Hell yeah, let's do it." She gives your shoulder a squeeze, though it was the alcohol confidence that lead her to agree.

You guys spent the rest of the night discussing it, talking about the dates for meeting everyone and how you would go about it. You made sure to write everything down in your notes app; not wanting to forget the conversation in the morning.

You and Renée had come to the decision that this coming Sunday, the two of you would have dinner at your parents house. You texted your mom about it, being slightly vague with who exactly you were bringing over but letting her know it was your girlfriend. She was on edge about it. Your parents knew you were gay, your mom took it better than your dad but she still had her complaints.

Mom: Girlfriend?? You're dating again? Honey, you should've told me! There's a nice man that moved in next door.

Your mom texted, you sighed deeply as you read the text. Sunday night was definitely going to be... interesting. To say the least.

You: No mom, I'm happy in my current relationship. Thank you, though.

You weren't going to be rude about it, she was your mother after all. So you let it slide and hoped it would be just the one time comment.

While you were dealing with all of this, Renée was in the kitchen. Pacing back and forth as she fidgeted with her rings. She had gotten in her head and was overthinking everything. Maybe she shouldn't have agreed. Maybe they should wait longer. Was she ready for this?

Her eyes flicked to yours when she saw your figure step into the kitchen doorway. Your expression soft as you walked over, pulling Renée into your arms to slow her pacing. "What's wrong?" You could tell Renée was overthinking, you knew her well enough by now to be able to catch all the little signs.

"I..." Renée paused, taking a breath and allowing herself to melt further into your arms. You gave her side a soft squeeze as you felt her do this," I don't know if I'm ready."

You frowned slightly, having thought that might have been the case." I get it, baby. I'm scared too. How about this.." You quickly came up with a compromise, Renée's eyes on yours as she listened to you," We wait and see how the rest of this week goes. Then make a finale decision Saturday night, if you're not up for it you're not up for it and that's okay."

You could feel her shoulders relax as she gave a gentle nod. Yeah, okay. That sounded fine. She would at least still be making an effort as opposed to quitting as soon as possible.

"Yeah... okay." Renée replied, you gave her forehead a soft kiss and kept her close in your arms. Hoping you at least eased her mind a little.

And you had, she was grateful for you.

[halloweenbitch2764]

I am not sure if there is a limited number of characters. If so, just do the bachelors. If not, do both bachelors and bachelorettes.

If you do reactions/headcanons, a reaction to finding out how strong the farmer is would be amazing. I love the idea of the farmer from Stardew Valley being inhumane strong, but most of the towns people doesn't know it.

I will do my best! Also, you're dating in these just FYI. Heart event spoilers!!

Alex

You were hanging out with Alex outside of his house as you tended to

You had finished all your chores for the day already

"Want to take Dusty for a walk?" Alex offered since you two really weren't doing much else

You nodded, and Alex got Dusty's collar and leash from inside

When he came back out, you had already coaxed Dusty to the edge of the fenced-in area.

"Don't worry about getting him out, I got it." Alex stated but you were already leaning down

You supported Dusty as you picked him up and set him down outside of the fenced-in area

It didn't take much effort

Alex stared in amazement, collar and leash grasped in hand

"What?" You asked as you pet Dusty

"You're, like, super strong!"

You couldn't help but laugh at his reaction

Sam

Sam had decided to come visit you while you were working on your farm

You still had some chores to finish up

Sam watched curiously as you did your chores

Feeding the animals, milking the cows, collecting eggs, etc.

A bale of hay sat in the corner of your barn

You decided to move it and hoisted it onto your shoulder, balancing it and carrying it somewhere new

It was just taking up space in the barn anyways

You didn't notice Sam who was watching intently

He didn't know how much the bale weighed but he could tell it wasn't something to scoff at

"Woah." He murmured to himself

Shane

You, Shane, and Jas were hanging out as you tended to do

It was a warm sunny day and you had finished most of the work on your farm

Jas had mostly been playing while you and Shane conversed

Jas had seemingly become bored and wanted some attention

You would have never assumed she liked attention as much as she did before you got to know her

She did seem like the quiet type

"Hold me!" She playfully demanded

And who were you to deny her?

"She's kind of-" Shane started

You picked her up with ease, hoisting her to your shoulders and balancing her

"-heavy..." Shane trailed off

He couldn't believe how easily you picked Jas up, much less tossed her around playfully

Even he struggled sometimes

You giggled at his reaction, and Jas giggled from the attention

"She seems pretty light to me." You teased, which caused Shane to blush

Harvey

You were hanging out with Harvey in the clinic while he finished up some work

He looked over at a piece of equipment and sighed

"What's wrong?" You questioned

"I just need to move that machine over a ways."

"I got it!" You volunteered, hopping up from the chair and going to the machine

"No, it's okay-"

"Don't worry about it Harvey, I'll be careful."

You knew he was worried about your well-being as per usual

He sat back down in his chair

"Just tell me where you want it."

You moved the equipment with ease, putting it where instructed

Harvey had a blush on his face, seemingly enarmoured by your strength

"What?" You questioned

"Just glad to see you're in good physical health." He waved his hand a bit

You internally giggled

Elliot

Elliot had decided to rearrange his furniture while you were over one day

He was struggling to push his piano over to the new spot

"Let me try!" You offered cheerfully

He seemed hesitant but nodded and stepped aside

You took your position and moved the piano to the new spot easily

It seemed effortless to Elliot

He was speechless

You saw the expression on his face and quirked your eyebrow

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing. Just didn't think you'd be able to move that so easily. That was quite impressive!"

You smiled, blushing slightly from the praise before waving your hand

"It was nothing."

Sebastian

You were hanging out with Sebastian at his house when Robin called for you

"I'm sorry to bother you, but can you help me move some of this wood?" Robin asked

You nodded happily and Sebastian followed you two, knowing he could help if needed

Not that he was particularly strong but he assumed it would be better than nothing

You easily lifted the wood (which was heavier than it looked) and moved it to the small pile that had been started

When you were done Robin offered to compensate you for your work but you told her it was okay

Sebastian was speechless

He knew you were strong, but you were stronger than he thought

"You're stronger than I thought you were." He complimented

You blushed and smiled

"Guess it's from working on the farm."

[kitkatopinions]

Gonna do a quick headcount of things that SHOULD happen before the end of RWBY. No I will not be leaving out things that would be consequences for stuff from seasons ago, just because it'd feel awkward and clunky at this point doesn't mean it still isn't important because it never WAS addressed. And also note that some of these are obviously more important than others, but they all still should happen.

Ruby and Blake should have preferably more than one moment focused on building their friendship.

Members of RWBYJNROQ who don't have established dynamics need at least small relationship building such as Qrow and Blake, Ren and Weiss, Weiss and Oscar, etcetera.

What happened with Pietro and Maria in V8 needs addressed.

Someone needs to talk to Pietro about Penny.

Blake and Yang need to have a conversation where Blake opens up about her past, they address what happened when Blake left, and they talk about Yang's hesitancy to be apart.

Blake and Sun need to have a conversation (if only in passing) about her being with Yang and establishing that they're still friends.

Nora and Ren need time apart and then need to figure out where their relationship is going.

Nora needs a strong character arc outside of Ren.

Emerald needs more work done in her redemption and needs to face some of what she's done and the people she should logically be emotional about leaving behind.

We need to establish the fallout of Atlas going down and the logically-must-be-there distrust that would sprout up around Hunters, the Military, etcetera.

We need to know what will happen to the Schnees and how they're adjusting to things.

Consequences of revealing the Maidens and magic to the general public.

Someone outside of Ruby and freaking Jaune should grieve Penny such as Winter and the Ace Ops.

Weiss needs to be concerned with helping and/or connecting with Whitley.

Oscar and Ozpin's merge needs to be addressed and talked about and potentially happen or they need to find a work around.

Team RWBY + J should tell their friends what happened in the Ever After.

We need to address the Ruby stuff in V9, Ruby's recovery cannot be super quick, WBY and Jaune especially should step up and admit their part in it.

We need to address what's been happening in Vale.

We need to find out where the last two Relics are and the group needs to work to protect them from Salem.

We need to get the Relics in Salem's hands out of her hands.

We need to know who the Summer Maiden is.

We need to have the group realize that Raven is the Spring Maiden and address Yang's lie.

God knows I hate when he gets focus, but we need Jaune to deal with what happened to him and specifically give some focus to him reuniting with his team and them reacting to him mentally being like forty.

We need to deal with the whole 'once the Relics are united, the gods will come back and wipe out humanity if it isn’t perfect' thing.

People still need to learn to be sympathetic to Oz and not treat him like an enemy.

We need to learn about and deal with whatever Mercury and Tyrian are doing in Vacuo.

We need to establish what's happening with the Ace Ops and Happy Huntresses.

We need to figure out what's happening with Qrow and deal with how he handled Ruby and Yang supposedly 'dying.'

We need to establish what life is like for the Atlas/Mantle refugees and what Vacuo is doing for them.

We need to establish Theodore as a character and why we the audience should trust or like him.

We still need members of Oz's inner circle to emotionally deal with what happened with Ironwood.

We need characters that should by all rights be a bit more important to get brought back in and be at least a little involved such as Glynda, Taiyang, Ilia, and Sun and Neptune.

We need to know what really happened to Summer and deal with the fallout of whatever it is.

Yang and Ruby need something to heal the rift between them.

We need people to figure out a way to defeat Salem.

We need to have people struggling to get people together to fight Salem and deal with possible conflicts surrounding that (considering the fact that having an army was considered a sign of pure evil when it was Ironwood)

We need to defeat Salem.

If CRWBY intends to bring in the Crown from the ATF/BTD books, they need to be established and dealt with as well.

This is all just off the top of my head! Yes, some of these things seem like they're going to be (badly) addressed in passing from the little promo that was originally supposed to end V9, but we don’t know how much of that will change and I personally am unsatisfied with almost everything in it and still think we need further exploring for all that stuff. (And no, I'm not considering Justice League or RWBY Beyond to be good enough if the main series doesn't make sense or have emotional payoff.)

My point here is... There is so much left to do in RWBY (arguably that should've been done AGES ago,) that I'm having a really hard believing much of it will be done. And I fear that whatever they do try to deal with will just be jam packed into the next season at the speed of light with no real payoff and it'll wind up badly done or unsatisfying because of it. Especially if they try to introduce loads more in V10 the way they did in V9.

RWBY is for sure the show with good concepts, because while I was writing out that list, I was sitting here thinking about how some of it could be pretty good and impactful in the hands of good writers. But it's also the show of no emotional payoff, and I seriously doubt that this next season is gonna deliver.

[beesmygod]

today is webcomics day. i am bea and i make "A Ghost Story" - part 3: sketch 1

ed note from the future: this got long. its going mostly under a readmore for everyone's sake. and i didnt even finish sketching, just trying to explain what is going through my mind while trying to sketch. look, if i write down my process in exhausting detail people will realize im completely insane. this is a net benefit to anyone trying to interact with me in the future who thinks i can be reasoned with. community service. thank you for allowing me to post this shit lol

hmmm. giving up on the first few panels for right now. here's what i'm thinking about as i sketch this:

too many of my panels were talking heads or constantly relied on one point perspective. i have been trying to work against this for a while with mixed results. sometimes the result is so bad i have to scrap what i did and start over but sometimes it's "good enough for TV"* and i hit publish on it. no risks, no reward after all. can't get better if you don't try.

in this first panel, i have two people having a back and forth conversation through a weird magic hole in the floor/wall. maxine is laying on a couch with hole right above her head. homestar runner will demonstrate what i mean:

however, there are logistical problems with maxine that homestar runner doesnt have. maxine's right shoulder is dislocated, so she can't lay on that side, or any side that would put pressure on the joint. im realizing i don't actually know what position would be most comfortable in her situation or how she would instinctually arrange her body to avoid pain. i start looking up videos from physical therapists on how they recommend patients sleep for some ideas.

also i start looking up what women look like sleeping on couches. how does the human body fold up. because this isn't it.

anyway, this was my first effort with the first panels.

for reference, the last page ends like this:

the top left of the sketch would have been the hopi clown back on the shelf with the "camera" tilting above it to reveal maxine. while this keeps the relevant object from the previous page in frame as a piece of connective tissue between updates....i'm struggling to fit the second character in. the one talking from the hole. maybe there's still hope for this? it's not terrible. initially i nuked it but maybe i can make this work.

fuck! she needs a pillow or two to make this work. this video is right, that DOES look naturally comfortable compared to the standard fetal position that would pull the affected shoulder inward. i didn't draw any pillows into the stupid establishing shot of the office bc its not the kind of couch you are expected to sleep on!!! this is a man's business office!!! i thought i was so smart!!

basically every couch comes with decorative pillows though, and the shot of the room didn't include the wall the "camera" was up against. my 2-point perspective failure might have paid off here lol. if i can establish that the second character is talking through the hole, he can use his rayman hands to reach across the room and get the pillow for her. it can be part of his personal campaign to show maxine he means her no immediate harm. the pillows were just out of frame. lurking. ok let's try it again. uhhhh after i eat some lunch

---

*my friend kelly had an anecdote from working in animation that im going to retell badly from memory. her boss would take the work she labored over to meet by deadline and would laugh at it, saying "ah, its terrible! but good enough for TV". and while extremely mean, he had a salient point: it never has to be perfect. it just needs to be good enough to be seen. sometimes i seriously think about this anecdote when im dissatisfied with my own art. it's bad. but it's good enough for tv.

[wexhappyxfew]

It is my first time writing anything to anyone, and I’m a bit nervous. I’ve been reading super bullets non-stop. It is just too good. I saw your prompt list and I thought that I needed to know more about the characters. Could you please write about Judy and Rosie?

P.S. Sorry if it’s a long list, I got too excited! Love you 😍

1st prompt list Touch

2.running fingers through hair

16. massaging them

34. washing the other’s body( me trying to be naughty 😆)

22. falling asleep on the other’s shoulder

2nd prompt list OTP

20. “Why do you insist on misunderstanding me?”

24. “Don’t say that to me. That’s not fair.”

30. “Leave me alone.” 

“Is that really what you want?” 

21. “Then take me with you.”

3rd prompt list Subtle Love

21.sharing their food with the other

7.giving the other their space, knowing they need it

8.enjoying the sound of the other's voice

9. distracting the other when they see they're distressed and close to freaking out

HEY ANON!!! thanks so much for sending this in! and apologizes for the time it took to get to it! finals week was stressful and now that i finally have time, i was excited to get to this! thank you for the variety of prompts you sent!!! it gave me a ton of options (which truly thank you, your excitement made my day to see!) i went with 8. enjoying the sound of the other's voice, which i found to work best!! i truly hope you enjoy! <3 (and as a first time, you did lovely! thank you more than anything for stopping by <3)

through the war

(a/n): a look into the early days of judy x rosie for those who want to get more flak house rosie and judy hehe!!! this is an idea i've had for some time and i think it finally fit here!!! :D i really loved this prompt and the way the writing went, more subtle at times, but really showing rosie and judy's connection in a way i loved! thank you and enjoy!

Sun-kissed and water-soaked skin were the highlight of the late morning as Carrie hung over the front side of the boat, absolutely losing her mind on Pappy in the other wooden excuse for a canoe, who was leaned back, splashing water over towards her as they cruised by one another.

"Fighters 12:00, Pauli!" Carrie yelled from the front of the boat, looking back over her shoulder towards both Paulina, in the back of the boat and Judy in the middle, "Get 'em good!" Laughter ensued as the three of them passed the boat from Rosie's Riveters, Pappy Lewis in the back splashing with all his might at them, and Paulina splashing back.

"Get 'em, girls!" cheers from the bank called, a few of the other women from Silver Bullets enjoying the friendly competition between the two B-17 groups that had gotten reprieve at the flak house. Carrie maneuvered the boat around a bit and looked back at the two women. Judy caught her gaze with a grin and watched as Carrie shifted her weight, leaning the boat a hard right as it spun.

"We're gonna hit 'em where it hurts, got that?" Carrie said, and Paulina mocked a salute as Judy let out a delighted cheer, a 'whoop-whoop' following, "Pappy Lewis we're coming for your head!"

"Not as long as I'm here!" Bailey yelled back at them, the boat nearing, splashing ensuing - only to end in the hard rock of Rosie's Riveters against Silver Bullets, enough for the boat to flop sideways and the three girls to go crashing into the water. Judy's body struggled a bit beneath the harsh suffocation of the cool river water, but she pushed herself to the surface, coming into an atmosphere of laughter, light and cheers. A smile crossed her face as she squinted her eyes open and found Carrie and Paulina in her field of view, Rosie's Riveters in the back, making way towards them.

"We'll get them next time," Carrie said with a laugh, running a wet hand down her face as she blew air from her cheeks and grinned, cheeks glowing red from laughter, "you have my permission to go as deranged as you please, Judy."

"On it." Judy said with a chuckle as the boat came over towards them and Bailey, Milburn and Lewis were offering their hands forward to pull them up.

"Got you there, Bergie," Bailey said as he and Milburn pulled up Carrie first, before reaching down for Judy.

"If I didn't have Pappy in my ear earlier making bets, then maybe we woulda won, asshole." Carrie said as Judy grabbed hold of Bailey and Milburn's hands and they pulled her up and out of the water and into the boat, laughing. Paulina was pulled up and let out a chuckle as she collapsed on the seat beside Bailey.

"I call rematch!" Paulina yelled as the boat burst into laughter.

Judy slowly glanced over her shoulder and up the embankment a bit, past where Annie was lounged up, aviators on, snoozing with Frank, the orange cat, by her side, and Marianne laughing with Margie and Kennedy by her side, and focused instead on Rosie Rosenthal. Her heart warmed the slightest bit at the gentle look of him - the loose blue button-up, the book in his hands, how relaxed he looked, sitting there up with the dazzling haze of the morning-blue sky and the glowing green of the trees and the grass around him. Suddenly, she wanted to be sitting right there next to him.

"Hey, you guys go on for another round, I'll sit this one out," Judy said, wringing some water from her hair with a graceful smile to the group, "might head in for lunch soon."

"You sure, Rybinski?" Pappy asked, "We could switch up the teams, I'll make you team lead?" Judy smiled and shook her head.

"It's all good, you guys have fun," she said, reaching the edge of the boat and flipping herself into the water and dunking herself under, the coolness of the water soaking her warmed skin. Coming up above the water, she looked up at the group and grinned.

"Carrie and Pauli? Make 'em pay, alright?" Judy said as she began swimming away, hearing the 'rah-rah' cheers from Carrie and Paulina, splashes following. Judy swam to the shoreline and then pulled herself from the water before heading over to the group on the grass.

"Looking great out there, Jude," Margie said with a smile, "I'd hate to be on the opposite side of that." Judy let out a laugh as Kennedy passed her a towel to which she wrapped quickly around herself and smiled, wiping water from her eyes.

"Well, I think Carrie and Pauli are gonna get 'em back pretty well off, so," she said looking at the group there, "you're all in for a treat."

"Where you going?" Marianne asked Judy as she wrapped the towel closer and stepped towards the hill. Judy's cheeks flushed and she bit back her lip.

"Saying hi to Lieutenant Rosenthal." Judy said quickly, "He finally looks relaxed, ya know?"

"He was asking where you were earlier, Judy," Annie said from her place on the towel, a smile on her face, where her hand was lazily petting Frank, "he'll be happy to see you."

"Have fun, Judy!" a few calls came as Judy smiled to them and headed up towards Rosie. Her heart began to pound a little bit more, the cool, late morning breeze making goosebumps run up over her skin, to the point where she realized she was in nothing but skin-slick shorts and a tank top, with a towel overtop going up to Lieutenant Rosenthal. Her cheeks heated as she looked up, watching him reading and looking near-picturesque against the backdrop of beauty that was the world around them.

"Hey."

Judy tossed herself from her reverie and found Rosie looking up from his book, squinting a bit in the sunlight, a small smile on his face. Her cheeks heated further as she stood there, hair tangled and wet, her cheeks red, the towel covering what she could and her eyes on his.

"Hi." she said quickly - slightly breathlessly at that, "Was wondering what you were up to." Rosie smiled that grin that got her heart pounding and then closed his book and watched her with those soft, baby-blue eyes.

"Figured I'd do a bit of light reading while I had the time," Rosie said, and she didn't miss the look he seemed to give her - admittedly trying to avoid looking at her more-than-bare-legs, his own cheeks dusting a glorious pink as he met her gaze again, "you? Or I could well….guess instead." And he nodded to her with that towel wrapped around as closely to her body as she could get it. She let out a laugh and instinctively went to cover her mouth and looked at him from behind the towel. They watched each other and Judy was sure he could see every inch of her the way he watched her, enough to make her warm all over.

"Your boys sure know how to have some fun," she said quietly, unable to control her smile towards him as she showed him her grin again, "and it reminds me of home. The creek, the water, the sun." You, she wanted to say, but that silent thought got bogged down by everything else around her. Rosie watched her, his smile growing on his lips like the setting sun.

"That they do," he said, his own voice sounding slightly constrained - breathless a bit like her, "would you like to sit?" With me?, seemed to be the silent question on his lips, but he didn't even need to ask. She would've given any time of day.

"Yeah, thank you." she said, with another smile towards him, before stepping forward, the grass itching her feet, as she turned and settled beside him on the towel he had rolled out. Judy pulled the towel tighter as she did crisscross-applesauce, and then glanced over at Rosie on her left side and smiled at his already persistent and present gaze on her.

"Whatcha reading?" she asked him softly, the pleasant noise of life and joy in the background of their quiet bubble there, side by side, her eyes finding his again as she leaned closer to his warm form.

"Of Mice and Men." Rosie said, holding up the book and showing her the cover, "Definitely a heavier read than some other things I've read, but it's good. You might like it. Listen, when I finish up, I'll lend it to you." Judy looked at him and smiled.

"Thanks, Rosie," she said softly, the instant his name left her lips, the corners of his lips perked upwards in a glorious display of his smile and his crinkly eyes when he grinned, "how are you liking it here?" Rosie watched her for a moment, and then looked down, before glancing towards the water where another round was ensuing of this game they had been playing - back and forth, splashing, laughter, freedom.

"Sometimes I just wish I was getting into that cockpit again," Rosie said, looking back over at her, "I don't know, just…it was simple, straightforward. It was mission, after mission, day after day. I was in a flow. A rhythm." Judy watched as he ran a hand over his face and dropped his rather broad shoulders a bit.

"But then I look at the men." Rosie said with a nod, and then glanced at her, "They need this." Judy watched him, his face a golden-honey hue, his eyes so deep and dark and distant all at once, and she nodded.

"They do," she said quietly, "we all do. You do, too."

Rosie was an enigma to her in a way other people had never been; so quiet at times, selfless, someone who wanted to get the job done, but didn't give himself time to rest. And in an opportunity like this, where that was the only option, he was mulling on thoughts of flying again. Despite not knowing him long, he was someone she found herself looking to a lot more often these days. And the selfless need to worry over him was something to follow.

He watched her for a moment, as if trying to believe her that yes, he and his boys needed rest just like the rest of them and yes, this all wasn't normal, but maybe for a second they could act like it and yes, for once they can focus on one another instead of a war in the sky. Rosie watched her for a moment and then smiled at her, and her cheeks bloomed red in a way she knew she couldn't stop.

"Plus," she said quietly, offering him another grin, "this is a good look for you." Rosie broke out in a bit of laughter at her mix between a joke and a compliment, but he took it all the same and nodded.

"You too." he said, but then they both seemed to freeze at his words, the casual phrase you normally said back after a compliment - the realization of what she was wearing seemed to strike both of them at the same time as a jumble of words left both their mouths, ending in nervous laughter and eye-catching gazes.

"What I meant to say was," he said, leaning an elbow on his upbent knee and a hand to his cheek as he looked at her again, "this. Being here. It looks normal for you. It looks good on you." Well if that didn't make her blush like a tomato she wasn't sure what would. But she nodded, and smiled a bit up at him.

"I practically grew up outside. When I was a kid, I mean. All of us, we were always outside. In the creek, with the animals on the farm, climbing trees, hiking," Judy said, "in a way, it reminds me of home being here. Being away from the war for a bit." She nodded. "Can't sleep well, but I guess for the time being that's okay, because I'm not in a ball turret and getting shot at." Rosie's face had grown serious and he watched her like the most delicate thing in the world was in front of him. He always looked so serious back at base that to see that same look cross his features nearly shot her back to that ball turret on the last mission.

"I haven't been sleeping too well either, if I'm being honest," he said quietly to her, then laughed a bit, "it sounds childish, but, I don't know. My mind's just running circles." Judy stared at him. She felt like for once, someone was experiencing what she felt nearly all the time. Constant running. Never-ending.

"Do you ever think it's like you're in some dream and that you'll wake up from it all one day?" she asked him, watching as he slowly nodded and turned to her.

"Sometimes." he said, "But then I go back and think, and I wonder how different things would be if all this wasn't going on. If, uh….well." Rosie looked to her and smiled slightly.

"To say the least, I wouldn't have met some of the people I've met here and I don't know if I'd be okay with that in whatever other world that would be." he said with a laugh and she smiled at him, "And if we're going to get back to any sort of semblance of life again, outside of this, like this, then we have to keep fighting back in this world, to keep it."

Judy looked up at him, and couldn't help but let her eyes traverse his face; eyes catching on how beautiful his long lashes were and how lively yet soft his eyes appeared underneath them, his solid cheekbones and jaw line, the slope of his neck dipping beneath his shirt, his hands and….Judy had to blink herself out of her wandering thoughts and instead ran a hand through her slowly drying hair that was sure to be a tangled mess and looked to him.

"One day we'll get the world back to that," Judy said, "and hey, maybe we can….I don't know, I can sit in the cockpit for once and experience what it's like? I can….be eye level with the birds instead of sticking out of the belly of the plane. Enjoy the sunset without knowing we're dropping bombs."

"I'll take you up on that." Rosie said, coming into her peripheral and leaning into her side a bit, his hand finding it's way to her shoulder half covered by a towel and half not, "Flying. You and me. When this whole thing is over and there's nothing left for us in England. I'll fly you home. You can be my co-pilot." Judy watched him, her heart pounding in her ears as her eyes searched his.

"You're too kind, Rosie, you don't have to…."

"No, no, I'll take you up on it. My promise to…I don't know, get us through the war." Us, Judy thought quietly.

Us through the war.

Judy stared at him fully this time, her entire mind consumed by him sitting there beside her, saying these things and making her feel all kinds of ways. Listening to his voice and expecting to act like it was nothing that he was talking as sweetly as he was to her. It was almost too much; these feelings, these emotions, someone felt nearly aligned with in life, yet the bulge of war was smack-dab in the center of it all. Judy brought the towel up to rub down her face and then sighed again.

"You okay?" Rosie asked her, placing his…very equally comforting and warm hand on her back, above the towel, "You went a little quiet." Judy looked at him, her heart pounding - even a simple acknowledgment of her quietness and she was spinning. Her mind scattered.

"Yes," she said quickly, a smile darting out, "all good, all good, just….." Mind, think, please, "thinking about lunch. Yes. Heard they were having a roast. Reminds me of home." With that, Judy stood to her feet and turned to Rosie, shivering slightly still, face and lips most definitely red, her hair a mess, her legs…..there.

Exposed.

And Rosie.

There.

Staring up at her.

"I don't want to bother your reading anymore, so," Judy said, "I'll see you around, Rosie." She turned and looked over her shoulder, and with a burst of boldness.

"Come and look for me if you ever want to talk!" Judy's face was beat red the entire rest of the way down the hill.

And Rosie was left - stunned. And smiling.

[thatsmzbitchtoyou]

My Queen Chapter 2

Steve Rogers is the newly inherited Duke of Brooklyn, struggling to fix the mistakes of his parents while enduring an overbearing, matchmaking mother.  He has no intention of anything romantic in his future, but will a forced love connection with the Queen change his mind?

Warnings: smut, slight domestic violence, minor character death

Friday came and Steve was fuming.  His mother was constantly hovering nearby, fussing with his collar as he left his room and chattering at him about royal protocol as he walked towards the front door.  “You’ve grown so much since you last went to an event, you’re so handsome!  I’m sure she’ll love you–”

“Ma,” Steve said warningly.  

Sarah put her hands up in surrender.  “Okay okay.  Well good luck my dear,” she said as he walked to the car pulling up for him.  The driver quickly opened the door and he settled into the seat.  He thanked the driver and nodded to his mother as the door shut then sighed heavily when they took off towards the palace.  He had not been to any royal events in years, due to his embarrassment.  His mother was right, he had grown physically over the years, so he was sure Queen Y/N wouldn’t even recognize him from the last time she saw him.  He probably wouldn’t recognize her either.  They had barely become adults the last he saw her, and it wasn’t like they were ever properly friends, just acquaintances.

When they pulled up to the palace the door was opened for him again and he was led inside and through some hallways until they reached a large sunroom with a table prepared with two places settings.  Steve marveled at the almost fully-windowed room.  There were sun catchers placed in the awnings above him, little iridescent mobiles tinkling against each other from the breeze of an opened window and casting rainbow prisms along the adjacent wall and floor.  There were scores of plants lining the long window sill with a section in one corner covered by a long cushion and a blanket folded up next to it with a book sat atop.  He was left to wait for her and in the silence he strode up to the window seat and picked up the book.  Steve didn’t recognize the title, “Beauty” by Robin McKinley, but read the synopsis and thought it interesting.  A fantasy reader, he mused.  He set the book down and walked along the window inspecting the plants.

“Rogers,” a voice gruffed behind him.

Steve turned and then smiled.  “Wilson.”

Sam laughed and approached him, giving him a long hug.  “It’s been a while.”

“It has, how are you?” Steve asked as he clapped Sam’s shoulder.

“Well, thank you.  I’m sorry to hear about your father.  I would have come to the funeral–”

“Please, I know you were out of the country with Her Majesty.  It’s fine,” Steve waved away his concern.  “We got her card.  All is well.”

“Hm.  So…your mother…” Sam raised an eyebrow at him.

Steve sighed again, hanging his head.  “I know, don’t get me started.”

Sam laughed again.  “It’s alright, Her Majesty is well aware of how Sarah is.  You have nothing to be worried about.”  Steve gave him a small appreciative smile.  “Speaking of, she’ll be here in just a moment.  I just wanted to come say hello before I’m dismissed.”

“And now you’re free to go,” Y/N walked through the door just then, her lady’s maids following behind and distracting her so her eyes were turned away looking at the fabric they were showing her.

“Ah, excuse me,” Sam gave Steve a head bow then turned to Y/N and bowed to her.  

“Oh, shoo, all of you!” Y/N snapped, pushing away the fabric and waving Sam away, who quickly pushed the lady’s maids out the door and closed it behind him.  “Ugh, I’m sorry, Your Grace, I–” Y/N finally looked at him and paused, her eyes slightly widening.

“Your Majesty,” Steve walked forward, bowing to her.  Y/N automatically gave him a small curtsy and gave him her hand which he took and kissed her knuckles lightly before releasing it and standing straight.  “Thank you for your card.  We were most appreciative of your condolences.”

“Of course,” Y/N said, giving him a polite smile.  She tried not to ogle him.  Steve had grown over a foot, gained a lot of muscle and had become incredibly handsome since she’d last seen him.  He was no longer the scrawny, sickly boy she’d met years before.  He sported a slightly longer haircut and a clean cut full beard, making him look rugged but put together.  “Shall we?” she gestured to the table.

“Yes,” Steve said and held out a chair for her.  She thanked him as she sat and he walked around the small table to the other chair facing her.  Once he was sat Y/N picked up a small bell and rang it, resulting in a few maids and footmen bringing out plates of food and drinks.  As they placed it all down in front of them she thanked each of them with a smile before dismissing them.

“So, long time no see,” Y/N ventured starting the conversation as she put her napkin in her lap.

Steve huffed a laugh as he did the same.  “Yeah, I uh…” Y/N watched him as she piled her plate with food from the dishes in front of her.  He snorted as he looked away.  “I know I should apologize for not being social, but I won’t.”

Y/N smiled widely.  “You have nothing to apologize for.  Being antisocial is not a crime.”

“Tell that to my mother,” Steve mumbled.  Y/N laughed at his deadpan tone.  Steve seemed surprised at her laughter and a wider smile lit up his face.  

“Yes, she is…tenacious,” Y/N said, hiding her mirthful smile behind her teacup while she took a sip, giving him a playful glance.

Steve smirked.  “I feel like I need to apologize for her, though.  I do not condone such behavior,” the crease between his eyebrows returned.  Y/N wanted to run her finger down that crease to help him relax.  “My parents sent you letters asking for increases.  That was not acceptable and you were right to deny them.”

Y/N felt for him.  His embarrassment was palpable, and she could tell he didn’t particularly want to be at this lunch date.  She sighed, setting her cutlery down as she leaned back in her chair.  Steve was surprised again at her change in demeanor.

“May I speak frankly with you, Steve?”  Y/N cocked an eyebrow at him.  Steve nodded warily.  “As your mother may have told you, I’m looking for a husband.” Steve’s eyes narrowed at her.  “But I’m not.  My advisors are.  I’m turning 33 this year and they have decided that means I’m becoming an old spinster.  They’re threatening a Parliamentary takeover if I do not secure a partner to help me create an heir soon.  And since our Parliament is full of imbeciles, I’m afraid of what that could mean for our country.” She looked away from him and out the window, watching the hummingbirds at the feeder outside.  “I do not need a husband to rule.  This is the 21st century, for fuck’s sake.”  

Steve couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up his throat at her cursing.  Y/N laughed with him, shaking her head.  “I can tell you are embarrassed by your parents’ behaviors, believe me I know what that’s like, and now you have quite a load on your shoulders to bear when it comes to securing you and your mother’s futures.  A union with me would be highly advantageous to you.”  She leaned up against the table with her arms, looking at him conspiratorially.  “The suitors my advisors have been finding for me have been as idiotic as they are.”  Steve snorted at her candor.  “So when Sam said you were coming for lunch, I knew it was the work of your mother, but I thought it would be interesting to see how it goes, since I remembered you as a kind but quiet boy.  Now you’ve grown into a full-fledged man, and strikingly handsome if I do say so myself,” she smirked at him.  Steve blushed at her compliment.  “I don’t like playing games and I don’t like wasting my time.  If you do not wish to pursue anything romantic of any kind with me, please say so now, so I may know how to proceed with this lunch.”

Steve gawked at her.  Y/N had grown into quite the impressive woman, not just because she was the Queen, but also because of her tenacity and passion in governing the country.  She had made leaps and bounds beyond what her predecessors had been able to accomplish within just 15 years of her reign and made a reputation for herself as a blunt but fair ruler.  She was very attractive, he’d always thought so, but even more so now as she aged and grew into herself and her own personality.  He found her incredibly alluring and loved that she was straight forward with him.  

“To be honest, no, I wasn’t planning to pursue anything romantic,” Steve decided to be honest.  

Y/N nodded but didn’t look hurt or embarrassed.  “I appreciate your honesty.”

“Not because of anything to do with you personally!  Just because I have not wanted the same relationship I’ve seen my parents or others in nobility with arranged or advantageous marriages have,” he paused, trying to find the right words.  She nodded.  “But I do find you…quite charming.”

Y/N giggled at him.  “Charming?  I don’t think I’ve ever been called charming before.”

“Really?” Steve said, genuinely surprised.  

“Perhaps some polite euphemisms that refer to my blunt nature…sometimes intimidating,” she trailed off.

“That’s what makes you charming,” Steve then copied her stance and leaned forward on the table.  “Alluring.”

“Alluring?” Y/N’s eyebrows raised high.  “My goodness Steve, are you trying to make me blush?”

“Maybe,” Steve smirked at her.  He felt himself getting more comfortable with flirting.  “It does bring such a pretty color to your face.”

Y/N’s eyes widened as she did blush that time.  She couldn’t hold his gaze and quickly looked down at her food.  “Thank you,” she muttered, giving him a quick glance.

“Are you not used to receiving compliments, Your Majesty?” Steve teased her.

“Y/N, please.  And I receive plenty of compliments, but they're usually from people trying to get something from me,” Y/N answered honestly.  “They're also not usually coming from such a pretty face.”

Steve blushed deeply, having to look away from her this time and fight the smile on his face.  “Pretty, am I?” he laughed.

“Ridiculously,” Y/N laughed with him.  They stared at each other for another moment.

“Would you like to go on a date with me?” Steve said hopefully.

Y/N gave him a lopsided smile.  “Yes.”

The rest of lunch was them eating and getting to know each other better.  By the time they had finished their plates and the conversation began to wind down, the sun had moved in the sky, casting shadows into the sunroom as the afternoon wore on.  A knock came at the door, interrupting Y/N in a story about Sam, who walked through the door.

“Speak of the devil,” Steve laughed.

Sam gave them both a disapproving look then turned to Y/N.  “Your Majesty, your meeting with the Prime Minister?”

“Ugh,” Y/N rolled her eyes dramatically, wiping her hands and her mouth on her napkin then standing.  Steve quickly stood with her.  “I’m sorry to cut this short, Steve–”

“Short?  You’ve been talking for three hours!” Sam said incredulously.  Y/N’s eyebrows raised at him and he shut his mouth and looked down.  Steve chuckled.

“As I was saying, thank you for coming to lunch, Steve,” Y/N turned back to him and lifted her hand.  He quickly took it and kissed her knuckles again.  Instead of dropping her hand he decided to be bold and pulled her hand, making her step towards him.  He then dipped his head and kissed her cheek, making her inhale sharply, her fingers grasping his hand tightly.

“It was my pleasure, Y/N,” Steve said quietly next to her ear.  She looked up at him with wide eyes, her mouth slightly open.  “I’ll call you about that date.”

“I look forward to it,” Y/N said politely, but there was a hunger in her eyes.

Steve smiled and bowed to her before walking toward the door, Sam staring at him wide-eyed as he followed him out.  Once they were out of earshot Sam pushed him, making him trip forward a bit.  “What the hell?” Steve scoffed at him.

“What was that?” Sam chastised him.  “You can’t kiss her face!  Or call her by her first name!” 

“Well I just did,” Steve smiled.  “We have a date.”

“A date?” Sam whisper-yelled at him.  “How?  She hasn’t wanted to date anyone…ever!”

“Guess I’m a pretty good flirt,” Steve shrugged.  Sam led him back to the front doors, the car already waiting for him.  “Hey, what’s her favorite flower?”

Sam gave him an unimpressed look.  “Sunflowers.  Why?”

“Just checking,” Steve said, clapping Sam’s shoulder before getting in the car.  His mother would never let him live this down.

[zukkaoru]

🌱 alive & free (look at me!) 🌱

The man is wrapped in a blanket that was likely white at one point but is now smeared with dirt and grass stains. His hair, too, is dirty. Like he’s been sleeping on the ground for more than just one night. Kenji tiptoes over to him. He rolls his shoulder, then kneels down beside the man and pokes him. “Um, sir, are you okay?” The man doesn’t respond. Kenji pokes him harder, putting a little extra strength into it with the help of his ability. The man rolls from his side over onto his stomach, groaning. Kenji breathes out a sigh of relief. That means he’s not dead, at least. “Are you—” he whistles. “Are you hurt?” “Twelve seconds,” the man responds, still facedown in the dirt. “Then, I’m going kill you.”

after the decay of angels incident, kenji makes a new friend and nikolai starts to heal

🌱 22.4k words || kenji & nikolai || post-doa arc 🌱 written for corey @that-was-anticlimactic <3

[the-knife-consumer]

"Yona was just added bc Nintendo wants people to stop shipping sidlink!" Literally what the hell are you talking about

[hella1975]

‘you’re all i got, cousin’ crying over richie of all people. can this day get any worse

[celestial-toys]

been laying here listening to Lucky by Dermot Kennedy on loop for half an hour while thinking about Everything Stays and crying

[butwhatifidothis]

Sorry if you've already posted something like this before, but how well do you think Claude's routes tackle the subject of dismantling prejudice and racism? Because I've seen some recent discourse that's caused some controversy and it was about how Azure Moon/gleam character's and Dimitri handle that theme better with Duscar. And how Claude is a bit redundant as a character in FE3H as the golden deer routes overall don't end up contributing too much to the overall story rather than lore. My personal opinion is that I do see what they were trying to do with Claude and racism because it was there but because of how undeveloped the writing in both of his routes were the message doesn't come off as strong or a bit naive for Claude. (I do have like 3 more chapters in VW I need to catch up on.)

The outright tackling of it, in the base route itself? Somewhat poorly, negl. But the concept of him doing so itself would not be redundant, imo. The two of them tackle the same core issue - trying to dismantle prejudice and allow for peace to fall between differing people - in two very distinct, different ways.

Dimitri, when all is said and done, has the power and the means to achieve this with the power he has as king of Faerghus. Duscur is a land that, while separate from it culturally, still resides in Faerghus, and it is a relatively small land at that. And Faerghus has been its direct oppressor for years - it has direct power over Duscur. So Dimitri taking up the reigns of king gives him a far more direct means of amending that - it's not a "blink and it's over" sort of thing, but he is ultimately the one with the most power in this situation to be able to fix it. And, as seen by AG, him doing so leads to a lot of progress being able to be made. There's still a lot to fix, but to say he's been king for, what, 2 years max? There's a lot he's been able to do.

Claude, however, is not in that sort of position. For starters, he's not even guaranteed to become king, unlike Dimitri who always would once he became of age (as Rufus was only a regent in place of king until Dimitri was old enough to be coronated). He has to deal with the struggle of attaining the power to be able to make change at all, unlike Dimitri who had to fight Rufus to keep his already attained right to the throne, which immediately differentiates the two stories by a fairly large degree. But aside from that, Claude is trying to amend the relationship between two entire continents worth of people. As king of Almyra, he would not have power over Fodlan - Almyra isn't oppressing Fodlan, like Faerghus was with Duscur, nor does Fodlan physically reside within Almyra. Therefore he has far less direct access to change than Dimitri does - he has to rely on his connections to Fodlan's people-in-charge far more than Dimitri does (who, mind, still does do that, but it wouldn't be to the necessary degrees Claude would have to go to).

The relationship between Faerghus and Duscur and Fodlan and Almyra are fundamentally different, therefore Dimitri and Claude's approaches to the issues of them would similarly be different at their cores. Dimitri has more direct power to change things, but the things that need changing are horrific and involve giving power back to a people who've had theirs stolen from them. Claude doesn't have to deal with a history of oppression per se, but he has to deal with a long-standing feud between two fairly-equally powered continents that he can only potentially have direct power over one of. The stories of how these two fix these relationships - as in, achieving their goals that are, at the end of the day, somewhat similar - wouldn't be redundant because of the important differences they do have.

HOWEVER. That's mostly conceptually. In practice, Dimitri does achieve his goals (or gets far closer to them) than Claude ever does, in either games, because both games cared more to give Dimitri a character-driven story. All Claude was ever given was a bootlegged BE route in both games, with Hopes going further and making Claude himself a bootleg of Edelgard. Not much of a chance for Claude to do much, given those facts lmao.

As well as that, the writers only cared to have any story centered around Fodlan and not much else - Duscur gets a pass for, again, physically residing in Fodlan, but as we can see anything else gets The Boot. Almyra is barely talked about, Brigid is barely talked about, Dagda is barely talked about, Sreng is barely talked about; despite having characters that come from those places (or in Sreng's case, having characters otherwise connected to it somehow), they have almost no information given about them at all, and they have pretty much no narrative focus. Which is somehow better than Albinea or Morphis, who both get pretty much nothing at all.

And not to be a bringer of wild and wacky news or anything, but centering a main character around a place that you deliberately give no information about save for the smallest crumbs... isn't going to lend itself to a good story if you try to make that character's story have much to do with that place. Which is Claude's biggest problem in that aspect of his writing. Duscur is allowed to have an important role in both Dimitri's story (and other characters' stories) as well as the plot of 3H itself (as it's connected to the reason Lambert is dead and thus Faerghus is weakened as much as it is, which makes Edelgard's invasion of it easier) - Almyra is not. Almyra, at its core, is only really allowed to set up Claude's character, but doing anything more with it - directly interacting with Almyra the same way that Duscur is directly interacted with? Not... really. It says a lot that the writers decided to make Claude's paralogue centered around Fodlan and not Almyra in 3H - and Hopes, technically, though for once it is slightly better there by having Almyra at least be involved somehow.

I'll say this, end of the day: Claude was never going to be able to focus any attention on amending Fodlan and Almyra's relationship in 3H in any sort of similar way that Dimitri was able to focus any attention to amending Faerghus and Duscur's relationship given the nature of 3H's narrative priority to Fodlan's issues. And while he did have a really good opportunity to do so in Hopes, that was impossible because for the majority of the game it's his dumbass evil Edelgard-wannabe twin Clyde that's in the game at all. While Claude ultimately is fairly redundant against Dimitri in execution regarding their goals, it didn't have to be on a conceptual level - hope that makes sense lmao

[musical-chick-13]

Is the guy in question you hate denji? Tough luck out there, there are a lot of people who actually consider such a character a good protagonist 💀

No, it's not Denji. I actually really like Denji a lot! (Which surprised me as much as I'm sure it will surprise you.) I'm...currently waiting for my meds to kick in so I can go to sleep, so I am not in a position to fully unpack why, but it ultimately boils down to how I think he showcases the power (haha, pun not intended) of human connection in the form of the friendships he makes (Power, Aki, Pochita, etc.), exemplifies how hard it can be to untangle the importance society places on sex/sexual contact from other types of relationships and physical intimacy, and, probably most crucially, I never felt like any of the female characters he interacted with were in danger from him. He's...a lot. But he mostly just seems like an average teenage boy to me. And he occupies this space where I don't think he can be fully put in a box. He's selfish in many aspects, but he's not a heartless character. He's very girl-obsessed/sex-obsessed, but the strongest and most plot-significant, genuine connections he makes are platonic. He can be incredibly effective at what he does, but he's also...not the brightest or most forward-thinking guy in the world. For all of his faults, he feels like a real person, and ultimately I want him to be okay.

Anyway, the character I hate more than anyone else is--*I am sniped from 70 feet away*