#and ive never been with a black woman i didnt own

[skin-slave]

Rip to the founding fathers. They would've loved Doritos.

[4pfsukuna]

Enemies to f⭐️cking lover Toji

Ok so ive been thinking about releasing a 3-5 part enemies to lovers(or something along those lines) for toji although i know the most common works on here is one shot smut. Trust smut will be involved… its toji

You used to be an american spy but japan pays nearly tripple. The jobs were quick easy taking 2 days at max. You had climbed the interest ladder for your ability to get things done in a quick and neat fashion with minimal mess and uproar increasing your salary from 4 figures to six in only a couple of months. Unfortunately theres another assasin whos getting in your way and hes the exact opposite of everything you stand for. 

Not only does he not wear a mask to cover his identity, he lets his targets know exactly who he his just so they can have his name as their last thought before death.

Toji fushiguro.

The biggest jackass youve ever met.

This wasnt your typical one sided beef where youd get mad at him and hed flirt no he had beef with the number one assassin who was stealing his target which means his money. It truly grinded his gears and yours when they made you split a salary.

“Might as well go home princess” you hear his raspy voice though princess was said in a derogatory way hes made it clear several times he hated the way you did things. Why be so… clean. Death is death.

“Fuck off pretty boy go back and crawl into whatever shitty little backroom of a laundry mat and return to horse betting” you seethe having done your research on him. Its not like he needed the money for anything important unlike you who wanted it for taking care of responsibilities back home.

This mission had been one of your biggest yet and you did not need to blow your hiding spot nor cover by arguing with his big ass over nothing.

You're grabbed from the crouching position your in and slammed against the brick wall not hard enough to hurt but it does press into your all black outfit.

“You can do whatever research you want on me but you dont fucking know me… you dont know shit.” he snarls lip on his scar stretching further yet you shove him off. “And im not a pretty boy”

“Please youre not the threat you think you are” you scoff attempting to bruise his ego and the way he steps forward lets you know you did but you never let your guard down to your surroundings and youre quick to pull out your gun aiming in his direction.

He chuckles crossing his arms over his broad chest and you may be uninterested but youre not blind to how his compression tee squeezes him in a way thats… satisfactory to the eye.

“Going to shoot me princess? I thought you were too good to get your hands dirty. Squeemish at blood even” he pokes until you release six shots shooting the men slowly approaching that he failed to notice.

“You fucking shot me!” He growls touching the tiny drip of blood from where the bullet grazed the tip of his ear just enough to break skin not cause any definite damage. 

Taking a bow you smirk before making eye contact with him the only gap in your mask being the slot for your eyes.

“Oh sorry about that pretty boy, ill do you a solid and let you tell shiu you got this one all on your own.” you tease knowing his pride wouldn't let him take the credit for something he wouldn’t do. 

“No i don’t want your pity kill” he seethes looking as if he’s ready to throw a tantrum yet you can only smile knowing you won this battle.

“Great more money for me” you grin running past him the location no longer serving you any purpose. It was time to cash in and Shiu didnt stay up past 2am.

Toji grabs your arm stopping you from escaping though before he could speak the faint sound of sirens in the distance growing closer.

“What? You goin’ to hold me here until the cops get here with these other dead bodies how do you think that’s going to look? A big, strong and muscular giant holding a petite young woman like myself” you victimize yourself and you watch the frustration grow in his eyes knowing he has to let you go.

“Its not fucking over” he hisses releasing you with a slight push making your smile grow even wider.

“Great more chances for me to teach a pup like you what not to do” you tease tearing off a piece of his shirt and pressing it to his ear. “Wouldn’t want your blood at a crime scene would we fushiguru”

And youre dissapearing into the darkness of night and he watches your silhouette slip down an alley until he no longer can. 

You may have thought you had the last laugh but he was best friends with Shiu. So when you near you third week of no assignment you figure its time to reach out to the former and see what the issue is. Learning that Toji somehow convinced him you wanted a break you decided it was time to cut your ties temporarily with the man and find a new “project manager”

The next assignment is the most you’ve ever been offered so high in the six digits it’s close to seven and for a simple retreival mission.

So when youre standing surrounded

“Toj

Waking up with a throbbing headache youre confused when you meet the eyes of a spikey haired 5 year old who is playing with a toy truck a black puppy not to far behind. He must feel you stairing since he turns to face you and gives you a toothy grin.

“My dad must like you, he doesnt let us wear hats in the house but let you keep your mask on” he stutters slightly and you reach up feeling the mask

[femmefatalevibe]

hello! ive gone through some of your posts and i gotta say, you give pretty solid advice. i hope your own life is also going as smoothly as the advice giving! ❤

i was wondering if i could ask your opinion, as much as you can offer it to a stranger from the internet.... i know its not easy to give meaningful advice on complicated matters to total strangers.

im 29, i have a very good degree and a decent job, i am not more insane or annoying than an average person and i look just fine. i do however have a problem finding a long term partner. ive been working very hard at uni/later as an intern so it didnt leave much time for a rich social life and lot of dating. i also had the misfortune of spending several years in a very unhealthy relationship when i was about 20, young and stupid. several years of determined singleness followed immediatelly after that.

so now that im old and less stupid, ive tried dating apps, ive tried going out for drinks with acquaintances but never more than 2 or 3 times with the same guy. i do have high standards... and im a smart independent woman which im told is not extremely popular with men. anyway.

i recently met a guy 1 year younger than me who works in the same profession but is only just starting, in contrast to me being a bit of a bitter old veteran. ive been kind to him as one is to new people, and hes been slightly smitten with me as a result, if i dare guess so. we went out for drinks a few times, he seems sweet, kind and doesnt harbor any extremist political beliefs (its important to me not to date fascist-sympathisers). thats all very nice but unfortunately he doesnt exactly look very attractive to me. i feel good around him bc he is kind and lovely but i think i have too much edge and that he couldnt handle my darker sides (lots of cynism, LOTS) bc he is sich a sweet summer child. and i also feel that i havent yet lived wildly and slept around and experienced all the instant gratification options life has to offer, definitelly not enough to just drop everything and consider a serious relationship with someone who doesnt feel like ive won the dating lottery (its bc of certain personal problems hes told me of having, and its bc of the looks. im an impossibly visually-oriented person. and shallow.)

so i am very tempted to slowly explore this and the options it could offer (for example a serious relationship) but i also feel like i might be setting myself up for failure and him for a lot of heartbreak. whatever should i do?

until now ive only ever continued dating people i was really attracted to... sometimes despite their dubious political beliefs. so actually this might be the new strategy that would yield positive results, dating someone for their impeccable moral standards and kindness rather than a pronounced jawline. (am i, deep down, really that shallow?)

this got long and tedious, i wont blame you if you chuck it in the bin instead of reading and answering. maybe all i needed was to write it out. might need to use my journal bit more often.

thank you for your time and efforts in any case. take care!💕

Hi love! Thanks for your kind words and support. Firstly, from how you describe yourself, I could totally see us being friends – we seem to have similar beliefs, values, and priorities when it dating comes to dating (no fascists allowed, career-oriented, endless cynicism, and making a pronounced jawline a top criterion of a date night lol).

Here's my take – given the information you so kindly and vulnerably shared with me:

If you're still single, there's no reason to make the prospect of dating (generally or casually dating a specific person) into a black-and-white experience. You can casually date as many people as you would like until you mutually decide to be exclusive with someone. Think of dating as a networking experience: It's a chance to meet and connect with various types of people. They can become (business or pleasure, in this case) partners, friends, acquaintances, or connectors to others who will soon become members of your close inner circle (maybe even a further partner or spouse – who knows!).

You can decide to date different people for different reasons. Sometimes, you just want good conversation and decide later that you're better off as friends. Exploring the emotional intimacy aspect of a relationship with someone of the gender you're attracted to can teach you a lot about yourself and the type of partner you ultimately want to end up with – even if you don't ever kiss, let alone sleep together. Just make sure, in this case, to share that you only have a platonic connection with him before he gets too invested. Being selfish when dating is essential, but never be cruel and lead people on.

Suppose you want to see where this connection goes, without commitment. In that case, you can always indulge in casual sex with others you are physically attracted to and only go on dates with this man in a more casual dating/companionship way.

I don't think it is shallow to not want to date someone you're not physically/sexually attracted to. Unfortunately, in our current society, you wouldn't even need to question this if you were a man. There are plenty of people we really like and are emotionally attracted to in this life but have no sexual feelings towards – we call them friends.

While it could take some time to find a partner with who you're compatible in every major area, consider how much longer this process would take if you settle with men you have no true interest in before you inevitably break up with them because you're unhappy in the relationship? Staying single until your values align and mutually want rip each others' clothes off every time you see each other in the beginning stages of dating is the best strategy – in my opinion at least. It is better to be technically alone than lonely in a committed relationship. You deserve nothing but the best. Never settle for less. Keep your standards high to maintain your most valuable assets: Your happiness, success, and peace of mind.

Hope this helps xx

[ddontyyoukknow]

I am so confised and dazed i dont know what tondo and doing what i want to do is not good enough i am so activated and triggered right now. I feel worthless and i feel stupid i feel incapable i feel like i moght as well not do or try anything i might as well die right now therebis. Kothing else fornme to do simple pleasiree seems so incipid to me indont know what i have to live for nothing is good enougb nothing will fill this void in my chest. I am a black hole i am fucking empty and i know that there is nothing in rhe wrold big enough to fill that void i am a scared little girl stuck in a bathroom i am acne ridden and im scared but its manofesting as anger hopeless anger anger i could never actually show and my world is collapsing around me. What would it be like to be apart of a community again my walls are caving in and are threateneing to crush me i probably already died im just here ready to fuck up my entire life becaise this is a fake life the life i wanted is gone i am gone this is my phantom life that my soul is being forced to live out. I am not real o am nothing he has crushed me into such fine bits and then i disappeared i am fucking vanished i was never important enough for ajyone to reccognize i was being lolled bit by bit remark by remark i left my body. The only people who could treat me thos way are phantoms themselves. They hurt me intil inwas a shell of my former self noore excitment s no more ambitions no more connection they literally beat me until i was a pulp and there was nothing left of my to try and corrupt. I kid myself to be safe from them to be away from them. I fled so they didnt kell all of me i meeded to sirvive my soul needed to sirvive. And it meant i would end ip alone but at least alive do you lnow how hard its been waking myself up again whole being bombsrded by everything they taught me this is not me i am not limp i am not scared i am not timid i am free i am high and nright i am special and i am me i am creative i am prompt i am loving and i love why and who had the right to corrupt me so and leave me to rebuild all by muself in my own cage of a body who is terrified of everything ive dont so mich but i can not bare being frozen anymore i want to live i crave so much to live my life and to make my desires realities and not continue to be stuck in my mediocrity formed by my fear i am so mych more than freeze eating and dissociativly watching my phone i want to connect to me you. Cant abandon me to i wont abandon you anymore its all i was taught - how to leave lyself down how to not be there for myself how to not trust myseld how to systematically break myself in two a scared terrified sulken frozen crying person crouched in the corner of the room on her phone or an active fun beight loving appreciating woman who is smart and strong and who makes decisions out of love and who connects with herself everyday! She has hope she know it will all be alright she has promise and she will reconnect she will learn to reconnect. She will take care of me i know it i feel so low and small and scared ans hopeless right now bit i mnow smthat she will xl ome in and take care of mw i font have to cewl along ahe is here for me invqj. Feel it i know whe woll jeher let me sown she is oll never let lenrqll whenjqw qlwqyw jI will knuer nrotke qjebwu lI quw is opp hebwienpoheebkebwjejeu nwoplnpidoio I he peoeve wheioo mqkeb heirjokrnxokwb iwninvqj iwy hI have onkqkeb ono n h and he bonkeerno hbto be healed lahain. I will be whole again and i can trist that she will take me there . I will be ok. I woll be ok i know she is taking care of me she will never let me down she will bathe me and groom me and clean me and feed me and clean my house and she will help me make art and she will help me express myself ans she will help me dance help me love help me grow help me love and help me cry and help me process. She will lay me down and liss me on the forehead and tell me everything will be alright. She had my back andni can trust her. I dont have to do anything my heart is sacred and it is bakuqble just envaise

[bunnypopgal]

Hello. It's been a few years since i made this blog and made my first post. I now deleted my first post bc i found it to be cringe and honestly really painful. i have grown a lot in these past years and have seemingly beat my hallucinations for now. i know that will most likely come back prob once i become a mother one day but i feel more prepared to beat them again.

Other than that i dumped and got dump by two partners, made and lost almost all my friends besides one. dont judge by like im sure many of us are im a sucker for the friends turned lovers trope and well ive been dating my best friend for almost going 2 years now. he has been super accepting, a wonderful partner and my biggest support thru it all so far. hes my only support system honestly.

i am deeply scared to make friends again after what my last friend did to me.. for years and i just let her. i cant really blame it on having low self worth either since i honestly really like myself and who i am but more so i didnt know HOW to be treated by others. let me be clear NOT how I treat others, no-no but HOW others SHOULD treat ME. isnt that nuts? you think that would be something we just have inside of us as humans (or otherwise) that we would just KNOW that. i dont FEEL like a doormat either but maybe i am. not with everyone, mind you. just like people ive grown to have developed a trusting bond in with respect packed in there like a mozzie stick, yum, ya know? i love em like chosen family and youre gonna body shame me for not being short for a woman, like what? you think i wouldve picked it out asap that chick SCREAMED pick me but i also saw her good qualities too which is why i wanted to be friends with her... i trusted her a lot. Oh well tho.

As much as it still hurts sometimes the fear is still there. i, as a woman also fear other woman. i know, i know. there is so many other wonderful women out there who would never treat me so badly but my brain is gone broken from so many traumatizing events over and over again. it irrational, i know it. its also isolating. i dont go out much at all but honestly blame the economy for that. i plan to be getting a part time job soon which you can also blame the economy for haha but also i want to meet people and have some kinda structure in my life again. hoping for friends right now is something im maybe not ready for honestly i think ill just start with talking to people again and let that be that. i hope to get some kind of a cleaning job so it will be a little to no talking to people depending on where im set up.

im just kinda scared to open myself up again to other people. online of course is different mainly besides the usual explanation but also for me, the internet is a black hole where NO ONE see the crap i shit out which includes my art i make sadly. i dont really try all like hard to make people see it anyways. i am still scared of people after all.

anyways today i have plans to hang out with my partner before he has to go to work. im hoping we can play palworld together again hehe. Other than that its house chores and back to drawing for me today. i just came out of another depressive episode recently so i have a few great messes to clean up. its a good thing i like cleaning, ya know when i dont feel like i wanna disappear. what can i say, its genetic. thanks, dad haha.

im planning to get back into my old hobbies too like live streaming. ive been live streaming all over the internet off and on since i was maybe 14. im 23 now so 10 years!!! WOWIE!! when i was growing up my family would joke around saying i need my own reality show haha. i do have a huge personality, ig but thats something im very comfortable and like about myself. bold and funny, i think!! streaming is a super relaxing thing to me. i talk to myself anyways and i always have. you dont stay this "sane" without talking to yourself to fight off the loneliness haha.

that reminds me recently my partner told me he found me to be a "increaser of morale, an inspiring person, you're motivating and you make being emotionally positive SO EASY." im still so stunned and very very VERY flattered he told me that! even if its not true im glad he feels that way bc thats a nice way to be. hes very very sweet to me.

well i could write forever right now honestly but i should probably go drink enough water to take out a house fire so i dont die of dehydration.

oh, if only. (JOKING)

[closhelby]

HER. - Thomas Shelby

Smut

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Warning: it’s peaky blinders, with smut

Word Count: 2472

AN: this is my first time writing smut, please give me any tips pls, it’s appreciate. It’s probably shite.

::::::

She always was on his mind. The woman, that always read between the lines, always two steps ahead of him, and had an incredible eye for business. She had left him years prior, leaving for a top business school in London. they never had a title, a label on their relationship, but it wasn’t exactly a secret that they always, somehow, gravitated back to one another. Often people, especially Polly, would say that there was no way two people would be so alike, strong headed but only rarely clashed. 

However y/n’s degree had finished and she was coming back to Small Heath for a period of time before she was going to figure out what exactly what she wanted to do. Y/n was actually great friends with the Shelby family, since growing up with them, living just down the road, they practically lived together. Y/n was actually younger than Tommy, she was ages with Ada and John. They were in the same class throughout school, Ada and y/n regularly wrote to each other, updating each other on Ada’s eventful life as a Shelby still in Small Heath and y/n’s very exciting studying life in London. 

They had actually planned to meet up, for a nice and quiet drink at the Garrison on her return. The thoughts swirled in y/n’s mind as she approached the Garrison, it had just gone 6pm, and she knew as it was a Friday, she did have a possibly of bumping into her first, arguably her only love.  Pushing the thoughts to the back of her head, she pushed open the door to see a fairly crowded Garrison. 

“Ah, y/n, how was London?” Harry shouted, from behind the bar. Y/n smiled at him, walking over to Ada sitting in the back corner. “It was good Harry, nice to be back in this clear Birmingham air”. He chuckled slightly, “Whiskey coming up love”. 

Y/n nodded, taking a seat next to Ada, giving her a cuddle, “Unsure if ive missed this place or not” y/n laughed slightly, eyes scanning the pub, looking for the one man she questioned if she did want to bump into. The pair was throwing back drinks like it was going out of fashion, knowing they would both regret this in the morning. Apparently, Ada wasn't allowing y/n to go back home, and in fact y/n didn't have a home yet and wasn't willing to go back to her parents, so Ada was insisting that she stayed at hers until y/n found a suitable place. Y/n didnt put up a fight, despite them both being hot heads, and taking absolutely no shit from anyone, men or woman, y/n didn't argue. She was actually really thankful for her. 

They eventually stumbled into the house in the early hours of the morning, their laughs echoing throughout the silent house. 

::::

The sun caught y/n directly in the eyes, quickly awoke y/n from her sleep. Her head felt as though someone had been hitting her head against the floor multiple times. Y/n continued to lay there, turning away from the sun, trying to keep the contents of her stomach from getting sprayed all over her and the sleeping Ada. She made an attempt at moving, sat with her head in her hands as she was trying to give herself words of encouragement to get up and make herself something to eat. 

“Fuck sake, why do we do this to ourselves?” Ada moaned from behind her. Y/n scoffed, “ Your bloody idea”.

Quickly standing up, in hope she could get it over with quickly. The room continuing to spin, as she attempted to walk to the door. Ada following closely behind. 

They both sat slumped over the dining room table, as they attempted to sober up and embrace the oncoming hangover. John now present, laughing at the two dying woman in front of him. 

“Good night?”

“Always.” Ada grumbled.

Pol placed a plate in front of them, toast with jam, “Does Tommy know your back? 

Eyes falling onto y/n from every person in their, “No.” answering quietly. 

Attempting to change the subject, “Told myself I would start looking for a new job today, since I shall be staying here for a decent period of time.”

John raised his eyebrow, “Tommy’s looking for a new secretary.” A slight smile on his face, “You've got a good background, business and that”.

“hm, I don't think so Johny boy”.    

“Don’t say no too soon, your a good asset to the business.” Pol added. No one was ever in y/n’s corner more than Pol, they would bang heads sometimes, as neither of them would back down. But she accepted y/n was the only one that had the best interest for Tommy.

The front door closed, and there he stood, the room turning to face Tommy, silence filling the room, then he broke it, “Heard you were back.”

“Yeah,” she replied quietly.

“Well, you know where I am if you need that job, I’m sure you’ve already been told,” he spoke, cigarette hanging from his mouth, as he walked away from them and into his office.

Y/n let out a breath, as though she hadn’t been breathing the whole time he was there. Ada smiled at her, placing her hand onto y/n’s, “I’m just going to get ready for the day love,” and off she went upstairs. The boys getting on with their day, and Pol following suit.

Y/n sat collecting her thoughts while trying to tell herself to face her ex lover, who she was still so deeply in love with. She tapped on the door slightly, opening it before opening it, “hi”, seeing his eyes flutter onto her shot tingles throughout her body, his eyes quickly looking away

“You can start tomorrow if you wish, I need a few papers signed and sent tomorrow. I can get your contract drawn up tonight.” He spoke, his eyes still not lifting from the paper in front of him.

“Yes, that’s fine 8am?”

“8.45, shop doesn’t open until 9. And there are others to set it up, that’s not your job.”

Nodding, “I heard you have a new woman.”

At this point he did look up at her, “I heard you had plenty men in London,”

She laughed slightly, nodding before heading to the door, “none were ever a patch on you,” closing the door, leaving a smirk on Thomas Shelbys face.

The following day came around, as y/n got ready for the day. Putting on a formal black tightly fitted dress, flats and pin curled hair. A slight tint of red lippy, remembering it used to be Tom’s favourite. Assuming Tommy wouldn’t be at the shop at this time, she took a whiskey with her placing it on the desk infront of Tommy’s office. The place was silent, despite there being other employees now starting to arrive, something calming about the place, almost the calm before the storm, she thought.

The hour was now around ten thirty, and there was still no sign of Tommy. She had already finished the papers he had left for her on her desk. It wasn’t the usual small Heath lady, she was educated, and to a very high level. y/n was sat twiddling her thumbs, awaiting Tommy’s arrival to get other things done.

“Y/n. My office please,” his voice low, as he stood behind her. She stood up quickly, following him into the private room.

“There’s your contract, if you wish to have a read over it. I see you’ve finished the work I gave given you for the day.”

Y/n took the contract into her hands, scanning for any mistakes or anything to question. But he actually was paying her nearly double the rate of other staff, and just over that the London rate was, “you’ve done your research eh. More than London rates, impressive. The peaky’s are stepping up in the world” Y/n smiled at him, as she placed the documents on the desk, picking up his pen, and signing it. Y/n Y/l/n. Followed with today’s date. That was now it, she was a Shelby Co Ltd employee.

...

The days turned into weeks, spending time with tommy while no one else was looking was becoming a regular thing. She now had her own place, just doors down from the shop. He would regularly call her into the office, and discuss things that he would usually never utter a word about. It had always been that way with them, since they were little, he would confine in her, telling her all the issue and problems he was facing, both in his mind and with others. But it was also coming to her attention that he was still seeing Grace.

Later on in the day, the clock chimes 11pm, as y/n sat listening to the music that takes her back to a child, while sipping a whiskey. The knock of her front door bringing her out of her daydream, she picked up her handgun that she kept on her at all times. Growing up with The Shelby’s, she had to protect herself in someway. She kept it behind her, out of view for anyone who was in front of her, slowly creeping up to answer the door. She swung it open, gun clocked and pointed directly in the face of Thomas Shelby. Not wasted, but defiantly had a few.

“Ah, can never change a Shelby girl eh” He spoke, laughing slightly as she lowered the gun and he stepped inside. 

“Although, I’ve never been a Shelby girl, have I Tom?”

“Depends who you ask.”

She sighed, stepping in to the fire lit living room, “Drink?”

He nodded in response, and y/n began to pour him a whiskey, topping up hers and handing a full glass over to him. “Why are you here?”

He stepped over to her, the closest they had been together since before she left for London. He placed a hand on her back, pulling her head into touch his, their foreheads touching. The sensation ran through her body like the first time they had ever touched. He placed his hand on around the back of her neck, pulling her into him, his lips crashing onto hers. Their tongues intertwining with each others as the kiss started to deepen.  Y/n reached for his jacket, pulling it off his back, before making her way on to unbuttoning his shirt. Tommy pulled the bottom of her nightdress up, y/n only allowing the kiss to be broken to allow it to come over her head. 

Their lips syncing with each other once again as tommy took his now unbuttoned shirt off, moving onto unbuckling his trousers revealing his already hard length. He began to push her back onto the couch, untangling her lace thongs from around her legs. His fingers trailing over her already wet pussy, “Do it” y/n whispered as she pulled his face back up to kiss hers. 

He didn't even wait as he shoved his length into her. Their bodies rocked in sync together, “Tommy...” Y/n moaned, her fingers trailing down his shirtless torso. The stars were starting to align, the room was warm, full of love. It felt as though it was five minutes but in reality it was around fifteen all in.

Their breath shortened as y/n’s back started to arch as she came close to climax, “cum for me”. He spoke, looking at her directly in the eyes as he rocked her world. The love, chemistry, love and lust, all so very present just as it was back how they were before. Both of them moaning in pleasure, as they both came at the same time. The deep breaths and steamy windows showing the passion that had just unfolded. 

::::::::::::::::::::

It was a Friday evening, a week following the night of sin that taken place between Tommy and Y/n. They had still had the talks in private in the office, and on another occasion she was fucked bent over his desk after closing time. Y/n wasn't one to hide her feelings, it would always be present on her face so when it came to facing Grace in the Garrison, it wasn't hard to tell how y/n’s feelings were over her.  

Pol chuckled softly, clocking the glare Grace was on the opposite end of, “If looks could kill” Ada joining in on the hilarity. 

“She would've been killed 8 times over” Y/n replied, turning back to face the women. Whiskey in hand. 

“Feelings still there for him then?” Ada asked. 

“No, I wouldnt say so” y/n lied. 

“Cant lie to a gypsy woman love” Pol laughed, y/n begining to laugh with her when the doors open to reveal Tommy and his two bothers. Tommy’s icy blue eyes scanning the room, a slight smile shooting over to Y/n before approching the bar where Grace was, where he stood there for a good twenty minutes chatting away to her. 

“I cant take this anymore.” y/n looked over to Ada, who was rising her eyebrow while taking a sip of her drink. She was fairly close to them, and y/n being y/n liked to have a slight stir up now and again. She stood up, smile showing on her face as Pol and Ada laughed, watching her approach them both. 

“So, hows your little fling going?” she spok loud enough that Pol, Ada, Arthur and John could hear her. 

“Y/n” Tommy warned. 

“Who are you?” Grace questioned. 

“Y/N,” she responded, leaning herself against the bar, “The woman he has fucked behind your back multiple times this week.”

Pol snorted, almost chocking on her drink, “ I fucking knew it. Gypsy senses never lie.” 

“To be honest with you Grace, you had absolutely no chance when Y/N came back” Ada added. 

At this point, Tommy had moved y/n away from the bar, into the small room, “what are you doing?”

“You cant take the piss out of me, fucking me but then fucking her thinking youll get away with it.” she was pissed, and he could see it in her face. They had never spoke on their feelings toward each other. Everyone knew that it was always each other but there was nothing that compared to them, they always seemed to go back.

“I have always loved you but you left to go to London, I had people follow you. I knew what you were up to so I assumed you would stay down there, I assumed you had moved on.” He spoke, almost showing vulnerability.

“Oh I know. I can remember faces Tom. I think you forget I can see right through you,” she seethed, through her teeth, “what are you going to do about this?”

Tommy cupped her face, pulling her into kiss her.

“I love you.” He mumbled, feeling her smile into their kiss.

“I love you Tom,”

[mitts2002]

Aight’ Bet

Hi this is my first time posting on here so I hope whoever is reading this enjoys!! This is a noritoshi kamo x reader where the nori and (Y/N) need a little push from their wonderful Gojo sensei to finally confess~

"Dont you think (Y/N) and noritoshi would make the cutest couple!?" Gojo screamed over the phone to Utahime who sighed in response.

"I can't help but disagree Gojo, Noritoshi doesn't seem ready for a relationship plus is the only reason you rang me really to discuss our students non existent love lives?" Utahime retorted knowing that the couple would in fact be adorable yet refusing to accept that Gojo could actually be right about something.

"No Utahime! I bet if them two were able to spend a few hours together the tension would build up so high that one of them would burst and BAM a couple would be born" the blue eyed male replied, the volume of his voice increasing with each word trying to convince her that they were the highschool sweethearts the jujustu world needed.

“How could you even say that!? I get that its cute whenever they glance at each other and shy away with cute little blushing cheeks but i bet it would take more than a few hours for a whole relationship to-” “OH you bet“ Gojo interrupted an obvious smirk on his face knowing Utahime wouldn’t back down from his advances.

“you know what i meant idiot i wasn’t actually trying to make a bet with you especially after what happened last time” the black haired woman scoffed after hearing a chuckle through the phone.

“Aight’ bet! tomorrow ill bring my second years to kyoto for some training and then lets see if something happens between our precious students“ Gojo proposed excitedly as if he were a child in a sweet shop.

“you know what fine! and im only agreeing cause i know nothings gonna happen tomorrow between them i mean noritoshi is too stiff and (Y/N) always backs out last minute” utahime exclaimed not wanting to prove Gojo right. “GREAT! if i win then you will have to be my slave for 2 whole days and if you win ill be your-” “wait i never agreed to that!” “see ya tomorrow then!” Gojo had quickly rushed his farewells before hanging up relieved he avoided Utahime’s lecture.

"Alright class!" Gojo sensei yelled excitingly as he burst through the doors. This overgrown man child always had something new, it could never be a regular class where his students actually learn then were let out for a break. No Gojo Satorou had to be the most extra male on this earth and for the first time ever it worked in his second year student (Y/N)'s favour.

"What it is now?" Maki groaned with an annoyed expression on her face. No one could blame her though after all the blindfolded man put his beloved students through. "Don't be so sour maki! Be like me a sweet little mochi~ Oh and before I forget I wanted to let you all know that we will meeting with our lovely sister school for some training. Isnt that great!?" Gojo sensei had announced clapping his hands and smiling brightly.

'I wonder if training is all this is' (Y/N) thought to herself realising how sus this situation was before speaking out "wait Gojo sensei weren't we meant to learn a super secret technique today? You said that you were gonna show it us yesterday and that nothing could stop you" (Y/N) questioned as Inumaki gave a little "shake" for support.

"Well my dear (Y/N) something VERY important has come up and we must go to kyoto immediately. You have no right to deny and we will be leaving in 30 minutes so go grab whatever you kids need" Gojo sensei had practically sung before skipping out the door. What an odd man everyone collectively thought before getting up to grab whatever they needed.

30 minutes has passed and in that time panda had gathered his and maki's weapons while you and toge stocked up on cough medicine and basic medical equipment. The journey was short since Gojo had practically teleported you all there and all that was left was to approach the students.

A few figures from the distance were slowly coming into view and (Y/N) could vaguely make out that only utahime, miwa, mai, momo and noritoshi had attended this last minute joint training.

Despite the others reaching and gathering around your small group of second years giving their greetings the only thing your eyes could focus on was noritoshi’s thick black hair as it gently swayed in the breeze. Honestly it was as if the man was in a L'Oréal advert or something.

"(Y/N) stop staring we all know you both have this weird thing going on but we're here to train not flirt dumbass" Maki had whispered into your ear but little did she know that you were in fact here to flirt and not train due to a certain bet between two teachers.

“alright kids listen up! me and the wonderful Utahime sensei have set up this last minute training as its always good to train with new people and techniques. Everyone will be working in pairs“ Gojo announced before Utahime continued.

“The teams we decided on today will be Maki and Miwa, Momo and Imumaki, Panda and Mai then (Y/N) and Noritoshi. Eveyones free to do whatever they want in their sparring matches just don’t severely injure each other, me and Gojo will be watching over the matches and determine the winners“ Utahime informed all the students before they scurried off to in different spaced out areas.

"So Noritoshi how are you? Its been a while since we've last seen eachother" (Y/N) said trying not to let her nervousness show.

"I'm alright just studying and training to be honest. Although I recently started to practice cursive and can even write my own name now" he responded with pride and a small nice.

You laughed causing Noritoshi to cock his head to the side in confusion. "Is there something wrong with cursive?" His deep voice asked with clear offense.

"No no it's just that's so freaking cute and you look so happy about it too" (Y/N) teased with more laughter and ruffled his hair

"Oi don't touch my hair do you know how long it takes to do these wrap bang things?"

"Well how would I know I've never done them nori"

"Well one day I could teach you if you'd like" Noritoshi offered looking to the side trying to hide his red cheeks.

"Aww I'd love that I'm awful at doing hair to be honest so learning some new styles would be great but first we gotta get this dumb sparring match over and done with" (Y/N) moaned as she got into position.

_______________________________

An hour had flew by and the students were taking a break from their matches happily chatting away while the teachers spoke in private about their progress. “come on look at the way they look at eachother OH (Y/N) touched his shoulder SHES FLIRTIN-” “GOJO SHUT THE FUCK UP YOUR SO DAMN LOUD” “sorry but loooook they in love” Gojo cried out with fake tears in his cerulean eyes

“Alright lets just observe look theyre going to the vending machine to get some drinks like FRIENDS DO“ Utahime emphasised on the friends worried she might lose and become this awful mans slave for 2 days.

_______________________________

“Nori im gonna go get a drink from the vending machine do you want one?” “Actually ill just come with you if you dont mind” “OH sure thats fine does anyone else want anything!?” (Y/N) yelled to the whole group receiving a choir of get me this please or get me that and the single tuna mayo.

The walk to the vending machine was quiet but a comfortable silence had fallen upon the pair. It was always like this when you were around Noritoshi Kamo. Peaceful. She didnt feel the need to go the extra mile to entertain him or ensure he wasn’t bored in your presence as your playful banter and sarcastic remarks towards one another was enough for the both of you. 

“(Y/N) is it me or have Gojo and Utahime sensei been staring at us more than the others?“ Noritoshi questioned unable to shake off the feeling of being watched. “Um i’m not too sure i havent been really paying attention to anything other than yo-“ Embarrasment washed over (Y/N) as the words flew out of her mouth before she could stop herself.

“Is that so?“ Nori smirked slightly as you swore you could drop dead right here in this moment. “No i just meant that” “Meant what?“ Noritoshi interrupted leaning closer as you fumbled through your words

“OH LOOK the vending machine is right there better get those drinks“ You quickly said and scrambled away before Noritoshi could get any closer.

“SEE Nori was too intimidating and (Y/N) ran off despite clearly wanting him! its never gonna happen today“ Utahime whispered to Gojo benhind the bushes as he shook his head. “Trust me i have faith in my wonderful (Y/N) I AINT RAISED NO BITCH“ He exclaimed in response while Utahime facepalmed.

The two young adults had collected all the drinks they needed and were ready to walk back to the group. ‘come on (Y/N) you’ve liked this man forever now and everyone knows he must like you back ITS NOW OR NEVER HOE’ (Y/N) screamed words of encouragement to herself before grabbing Noritoshi’s sleeve.

“Is everything alright (Y/N)?” “I have something ive been meaning to tell you Nori, I um like you a lot and i’d like to take you out if you dont mind” (Y/N) had practically yelled at the poor boy because of her stupid nerves and adrenaline.

The silence was broken by an angelic laughter coming from none other than Noritoshi Kamo. “Well i would’ve liked to be the one to take you out but i guess sometimes its alright for traditions and stereotypes to be broken by the younger generation” Nori responded as he walked closer to (Y/N) wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into a sweet kiss. The kiss was messy and clearly new to the both but filled with much love and passion that was finally being expressed by the pair.

As their lips eventually pulled away never wanting this to end, heavy breaths filled the air and cheeks flushed but all that was interrupted by a white haired male clapping in the background screaming “YES I WIN” while the other teacher crouched to the ground tears in her eyes.

[gayspock]

OK assorted black sails thoughts bc i didnt wanna make a billion individual posts

- first of all i find starz funny bc for real i swear ive never freaking heard of it before, except for torchwood: miracle day which.... literally i never finished but thats a whole ramble for another time (bc despite torchwood being VERY bumpy, i found a lot of value in it, but miracle day was just. give us nothing! to me...help)

- the women on the show are kind of a shame i mean. im not fuming its more of a (dejected sighhhh) lies back do you know what i mean bc its hardly worse than anything else but help... theyre all gorgeous models thus far do you know what i mean. i dont know. i think its just odd sometimes to look at it when the men are all fucking foul looking, mucky type of guys (<3!) and then the girlies are just like hiii<3 like okay LOL. max is rlly pretty tho (as is the lass in the hat- whose name i didnt atch..) so i shant be mad but its also likehelp... even just an OLDER? woman. not even one? sniffy sniffy? okayyy i'll settle

- the gentleman do have some wonderful haircuts i will say. rackham's stoner transmasc that hangs about in unique trousers round the back of spoons.... i mentioned it already but help. your rat tail... and flints pathetic and limp little ponytail. shrimptastic it is.... and johnny silver. (twirls his hair for him)

- INTRO ALSO FUCKS LIKE MAD BTW.

- i love a woman with daddy issues. i cant relate to any of them. not to eleanor, or to shiv or helena or any of the fine women with father problems despite having many of my own. but its very fun to watch them. like girlies (twirls my hair) just give him a slap.... who cares<3

- btw im screaming... john is sooo funny. what a silly little guy. i think hes going to get himself killed he is like a looney tunes character who should have been dead 5 scenes ago but he keeps defying all sense and falling pianos. the very definition of a rapscallion. he is a problem to us all

- whent hey just state their names and theit ships at each other. okay so cute girlies i bet you'd write that in your tinder bios huh<3?

- also i know i keep mocking and also fawning over flints stupid little ponytail but i think he for real deserves long gorgeous beautiful hair. like it would only make sense.

- theres so many guys in here from other things but only a little bit. i know i mentioned billy bones (SO FUNNY STILL) who keeeepsss following me but everyone else is sorta recogniseable. charles was in the 100 ik this. but like hi eeryone hii LOL

- "however what?" "however let me tell you a story. about a spaniard named vazquez." I THINK FLINT LITERALLY SAYS THIS HENEVER ANYHTING AWKWARD HAPPENS TO HIM. I THINK HE LITERALLY DROPS AND SMASHES A PLATE IN IKEA AND THEY COME OVER TO HIM AND HE JUST SAYS LET ME TELL YOU A STORY. I THINK THEY CATCH HIM NICKING 5P BAGS FROM TESCO AND HES LIKE HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT A GENTLEMAN VAZQUEZ. I THINK, PERHAPS, FLINT WOUL HIT SOMEONE WITH A CAR UNDER THE INFLUENCE. AND SIMPLY SAY THE URCA DE LIMA.............. IT WILL PAY FOR YOUR INSURANCE. GOD.

- also i dont know treausre island that well . do you guys think itd be worth a read at some point. not even wrt the show here just idk ik these guys are those guys <3

- i will say also tho btw. u know that reminds me of. i love it when ppl get rlly mad abt, like, funny re-imaginings of old stories, myth and folklore like this. SORRY. JUST SAYING. i remember of all the issues there were bbc merlin, ppl fucking fuming bc it disgraces arthurian legend. girlie i dont think colin morgan made patheitc little fuck me eyes for 5 seasons for authenticity.

- speaking of. sir percival billy bones is so funny. its like theyre keeping him around just to take the piss of their big strapping guy arent they.

- i also love gates. one like to slap his bald head

- ANNE? IS THAT HER NAME? I WANT HER CREEPY CRAWLY PUSSY SO BADLY. i realise thats her name. i think. shes also like... insanely fucking hot. im like obsessed with her a bit. its the hat. and the voice. i would not give a shit otherwise- i do admit.

- ALSO: THE SEX WORKERS AT THIS PORT ARE LITERALLY THE ONLY PEOPLE WITH ANY FUCKING COMPETENCE.

- I KNOW I KEEP GOINGON ABTO HIS HAIR BUT T. THE VERY DEFINITION OF T BOY SWAG I TBHINK IM ABOUT TO PUKE

- NO WAY NO WAYYYY HE STINKS OF WEED SO BAD

- RIGHT UH- this is one of the issues of just putting uncollected thoughts into a post like this, ehrm. im approaching the scene i was warned about

- i had a feeling.... with vane. i was worried he was going to force himself on eleanor after the warnings- because certainly, his character is portrayed in a particular way thus far, to the point where it was like... well had i not been warned, i wouldnt think it, but yeah. ehrm. i guessed.. him - or at least, he would have sth to do with it, as he has here- but god. i forgot about max and i was just thinking: they wouldnt let her go, surely that makes no sense with how early we are into the show, unless its one of THOSE shows where characters are brought in and out like theres a fucking rotating door, with no rhyme or reason- but no ehrm.. yeah. :(

- and now jesus. eleanor girlie i know he ha slong hair but jesus dont just mount him cmon... cmon!!

- sighhh... ok!! end of ep 3. really sombre way to end but <3 there we go... I'LL drop this now. idk if i'll watch more tonight orrrr wht! :3 love and light

[tomdiddlyumptious]

T.H| the cliché coffee shop

Summary: tom owns a coffee shop, and then you walk in?

Warnings: love and first sight?

Im actually just emptying my drafts

Tom smiled, holding the news paper in his hands as he sat at the small black table, the radio playing and he connected his foot with the ground a few times with the beat, a coffee mug with the avengers on it, hes such a big fan.

Tom had always been a cheerful person, a calm and collective person, all he really wants in his life is a kid honestly, a little boys hair to ruffle and a little girl’s armpits to tickle. But he was waiting for the right one, for the right one to notice him and ask him how his day is going, no he isnt a virgin, he just wants the actual wake up feel, this is the one feel.

So when he heard the bell ring for the front door, an immediate smile came on his face, looking at the woman who was clutching her purse, her hair flat ironed at its own length and a yellow and white poke-a-dot dress, a white sharp collar and white pumps, a nice smile on her red colored lips from her matte lipstick.

“Hello” he said, setting down the newspaper, his eyes meeting the females as she gently waved “hi! I just wanted a cup of coffee”

“Well come on!” He chuckled, standing up and walking behind his stance, putting on a pink apron making you smile.

“Pink?” “Ehh my daughter chose it for me” he smiled, “thats cute!” You both laughed, usually any other woman or man would ask how old he is and hes pretty young to have a child, so a gentle smile stayed on his face when he noticed you know how to keep boundaries.

“How do you like your coffee?” You shrugged at his words “ive never drank coffee before” his mouth dropped at your words “never?” “Never” you giggled. “Im gonna make you the best coffee youve ever had, just sit over there” he smiled, pointing at the table he was at and you nodded your head, walking over and sittting down.

You bobbed your head a bit to the tunes, humming with a smile on your face, tom turned back to you while he was running the espresso machine “your a nice singer” and you jumped with that, looking over at him while your eyebrows furrowed.”i hummed?” “you know what i meant!” he groaned making you both laugh. he continued to make it and decided to make you some fancy bread with some chocolate dip on a small white glass before sitting across from you, “carefull, its hot” he chuckled, placing it infront of you with a wide smile on his face. “thank youuu” you smiled, before a small human came in through the door, the bell ringing “princesss!” tom said, holding out his arms “Daddyyy!” a small high pitched voice yelled, jumping in toms lap and hugging him tightly, you smiled watching as you waited for the coffee to cool down. 

“hiii darling? how are you?” he said, looking down at the girl. “im good! hazzy took me shopping!” she cheered, lifting the small bag. “shes cute” you smiled, the little girl looked at you before waving with her eyes closed and her mouth open with a wide smile, her two front teeth missing making you coo “aww”

she has long hair, just below her small shoulders, hair golden brown, her nose like her fathers, just if it wasnt broken, she didnt have the same eye color though, its blue, her bottom lip bigger then the top one. “i know, shes such a sweetheart” tom said, watching as his daughter took the bread and chocolate “hey! thats our guests bread!” tom said, she let out a small sorry as her bottom lip quivered. “its okay, you can have it” you smiled at her, before lifting the coffee to sip, but instead you accidently spit it out, his daughter laughed while toms eyebrows furrowed in panic, you looked up at him with a crooked smile “its hot”

tom let out a sigh of relief, holding his heart with his empty hand “thank god, i thought you were thinking it tasted bad” “never!” you smiled, the small princess grabbed hopped out of toms lap to grab the brown napkins as you made conversation with tom. “shes a sweetheart” “ehh i do my best” he shrugged, looking at you with a side smile. “my names tom by the way” he offered a hand over the table “my names y/n” you placed your hand in his with a smile. 

“my names Cameron!” she picked in, handing you the napkins “nice to meet you cameron!” you smiled, taking the napkins trying to clean up the mess before tom grabbed your wrist “oh-” “sorry, you know you dont have to do that” he smiled at you, unconsciously hanving his hand ontop of yours. “i-its fine! i want to” you smiled at him, “you sure?” “yeah” you nodded, cameron turning on the radio. Smiling when her favorite song came on, no it wasnt the song now-a-days it was the song in cinderella.

So this is love?

Cameron danced around the shop while tom watched you finish, you felt his eyes burning into your soul so you looked up at him, a smile on your face as you shyed away, he grabbed the napkin away from you to throw it away. “You and y/n should dance to this song!” Cameron said, smiling at her dad while his face turned a shade red.

“I dont think y/n would like that” he chuckled, looking at you while you shrugged “it doesn’t matter to me” a light chuckle left your lips. And with that Cameron raced to grab your hand, tugging you to her father and pushing you into him “oh!-“ you fell in his chest and he held you, you looked up at him and he had a faded smile on his face.

“You know how to dance, right?” She asked you, and you nodded “i think we both know daddy cant dance” she said making you and tom laugh, Cameron took his dads hands, placing them on her hips “hold on them tight!” She ordered.

So this is what makes life, divine?

Your hands came onto his shoulders, smiling at him. “Alright! Sway sway!” She ordered, you and tom started to do the classical dance, just slower. Making eye contact and searching in them for any kind of answer, Cameron smiled and ate the bread while she watched.

And then he got a cold chill. Are you the one?

No, that wasn’t possible. You only met today and your both dancing to a childish disney song, his hands are on your hips....your noses basically touching...is this love?

You on the other hand werent really worried about it, you already knew you had a small thing for him after he put on his pink apron with a smile on his face, such a charming one.

Tom dipped you making you panic a little, before coming back up a little to fast making your lips touch, tom didnt know if it was on purpose but he took the chance, he kissed you, his hand on the back of your head while your eyes widened before you closed them, kissing him back and holding onto the back of his neck. His lips soft, feeling like clouds.

Soooo this issss loveeeee~

Loud claps were heard in the background, some childish laughs leaving the girls lips as tom slowly pulled back, opening his eyes and looking at you. “I-uh sorry-“ “nono...I enjoyed it” you patted his chest, dusting off the apron he still had on, “more then the coffee?” Laughs left both of your lips. “Wanna-wanna go on a date sometime?” “Heyyy! Im still here!” Cameron waved. “With Cameron of course” he smiled, and you nodded. “Yeah- why not?”

[echoalyssa]

Used | JJ Maybank

gif by @anakin-skywalker

WARNING : There IS heavy mentions of rape in this. Please proceed with caution and don’t force yourself to read it if you can’t. If this is a trigger to you, DO NOT read this. I love all of you and please don’t ever hesitate to come to me if you are ever struggling or need someone to talk to.

The fire crackles warmly ahead of you, the Pogues had decided to camp out around a fire on the beach tonight and of course you joined. Plus it was probably mandatory. With how many Kooks there were, the Pogues would have to show up to hold their ground.

You’re leaning back against a warm chest, his button up shirt was never actuall buttoned. He has an arm over your shoulder, tangling his long fingers with your own, his head resting atop yours because of the height difference. He laughs at something that John B had said and you smile, solely because of how comforting the laugh of him had become. As well as the soft rise and fall of his chest and the fact that if you turned your head and pushed against him, there you would find the soft rhythmic thrum of his heartbeat nestled in his chest.

His other hand is holding a beer but occasionally he’ll release the bottle with a couple of his fingers and brush them across your hair. Today it fell loose around your shoulders, wavy from the time you had spent in the water with little braids scattered throughout. When you first began braiding your hair this way you would add little silver rings in the braids to make the look fancier but had quickly abandoned the idea with how fast they would fall out and get lost during your excursions with the Pogues.

Kiara says something and John B swats at her but you’re not entirely sure what she had said. You’re too lost in the way that JJ’s fingers are dragging down your wrist and playing with the different string and twine bracelets around your wrist. One of which JJ had made for you, it was probably the worst, design wise, that was on your wrist but it meant the most to you and it held up.

JJ takes another swig of his beer and then groans when he finds it empty. You giggle at his exasperation and push yourself up from your spot on the ground. You rotate to one side, your body having locked up and become stiff, and then the other.

You pluck the beer can from his fingers and then bend and press your lips to his. His fingers slide into your hair and he pulls you in, his tongue sliding into your mouth as he deepens the kiss for just a second before turning you around in the direction of the drinks. His hands linger on your hips and you know that he’s admiring his view before you knock his hands off your hips and stick your tongue out at him.

“Beautiful” He throws in your direction and you flush.

You pick your way across the sand in the direction of the cooler, suddenly feeling the urge to get a drink for yourself as well as your boyfriend. A cooler breeze blows though your hair and swirls around your body. Goosebumps immediately show up after the path that the breeze had taken. You’re wearing a black crop top and denim festival shorts, a bandana around the wrist opposite from the bracelets.

You’ll have to steal your boyfriends shirt, knowing he’d give it to you without a mind. Being that he was so warm all the time, he wouldn’t notice the cool breeze.

When you get to the table there’s a Kook boy there.

“Hey baby!” He quips.

You wince, clearly he didn’t know about your relationship with JJ... or maybe he did and that’s why he was trying to use a nickname like that.

“Just two beers” You say, as politely as possible, trying not to cause any problems with any kooks.

He glances around, trying to figure out where you had come from.

“Are you new here?” He asks and you shake your head.

He reaches below the table and grabs two beers then pops open one and hands it to you. “Want to come hang out with me and my friends?”

And if he didnt have such a douche bag personality he may have been a decent looking boy. You smile at him again politely, “I’ve got to get back to my boyfriend”

A muscle in his cheek twitches and reaches for you bottle, grasps it for a fraction of a second and then pulls back and hands you the second beer. “Okay okay, I get it. See you around?”

You nod and quickly head back to your boyfriend, settling back into his arms. You hand him his beer and then raise yours to your lips. The strangeness of the previous situation is weighing on you and you down the beer in almost two sessions. John B is ogling you, very confused as to why you have suddenly decided to chug your drink and JJ is laughing and cheering you on.

Normally you can hold your alcohol pretty well, but today the world is already spinning. You feel fuzzy and giggly and you suddenly have to pee. “Ive gotta peeeeeee” You say, turning your head and literally licking JJ’s cheek. He swats at you and pushes you in the direction of the woods. Normally he offers to come with you but today he’s engrossed in his conversation with Pope and just lets you go.

You stumble into the trees, giggling and running your fingertips across the bark. You’re stumbling farther into the woods than normal. Normally you just go in far enough to squat and pee where nobody can see you but you’re so entranced with the way the world is spinning, it’s just so pretty.

“Hi again pretty girl.” You spin, confused. And see the boy that had given you the beer. You should be suspicious but you’re just giggling, bent over at the waist.

He moves closer, and then you feel his hand in your hair. You try to jerk upwards but the world is slowing now, it shouldn’t be. You had only had one beer, something doesn’t add up here but you can’t think, your brain is moving too slowly and you’re sinking to the ground and he’s getting so close. And then... the world blacks out.

~~~

When you come to you aren’t sure where you are. It’s cold, freezing actually, and you can hear a voice yelling your name.

“Y/N! Where are you?!”

The voice belongs to your boyfriend, you would know that voice anywhere despite how slow your brain is working.

The edges of your vision is blurred and then you hear your name again and JJ is running towards you.

There’s a look of horror on his face but you’re drifting back out of consciousness again and he’s gone.

~~~

JJ runs toward his girlfriend, his mind racing. He can see her lying on the ground, she’s not conscious and he can see that. But he can also see the bruises that have appeared on her skin, he can see that her shorts are gone and she’s lying bare. He knows this isn’t her doing but he can’t bring together the words to his mind of what this is. He knows she’s been drugged and used. But he doesn’t want to believe it. He wants to pretend this is a nightmare, where he can just wake up.

He’s used to being knocked down, he’s used to the abuse and the horribleness of life but he’d always been able to protect you, up until now.

She’s been... she’s been raped. And he knows it. He rushes to you, tries to cover you as best as possible before he’s running back to the pogues, yelling for their help.

~~~

You wake up again in JJ’s bed. It’s familiar and warm, but the effects of the alcohol have worn off now and your brain is finally working and you’re sewing together the pieces of what had happened.

It comes rushing back in a flash, you don’t remember it actually happening but you remember getting the beer from the Kook, you know that he had grabbed your drink unnecessarily. You remember heading into the trees to pee, and then losing consciousness. And then you remember JJ calling for you, seeing him run to you and you remember the feelings of your body and it clicks in you.

And you let out a rough sob. Bending over the side of the bed and dry heaving as the realization hits you like a ton of bricks.

The door flies open and your boyfriend emerges in the doorway and you sob again, scrambling away from him. He’s your boyfriend and you love him but you can’t be around him, not with how violated you feel. Not with the way you can’t even look at him, hear his breathing, see the way his body is moving.

This Kook had ruined you, and left you to pick up the pieces. No man or woman should ever do such a thing as this. You’d just never thought that it could ever happen to you.

[hitoshisbabygirl]

Author's Notes ♡: Hello hello! Here’s my POCuties collab piece for Valentine’s Day. Even though today sometimes makes me feel unloved please know everyone is deserving of love and even if you don’t have someone this year, you can have me! I love you and so do your favs okay? (✿◠‿◠) ~ bunny ❥

Warnings : none! Just very sweet (a bit of the reader feeling like a burden to tamaki so a touch of sadness here and there)

Word count : 2.1k

Paring(s) : Tamaki Amajiki x F! Reader (fem pronouns)

Enjoy ♡

———————————————————————

Forever // T. Amajiki

Being with Tamaki for a few years taught his lover a lot. She saw more sides of him than most, and it made her heart swell to see the usually quiet boy happy and determined when he accomplished something he was trying for or when he was down she knew just how to cheer him up.

As the day drew on she realised just how much she loved him and how much she wished for him to be home, to give him a big kiss as he came through the door, knowing that his day was long, plagued with paperwork and patrols. Hearing the door open she saw her tall boyfriend enter, hood over his eyes as he let out a sigh, stretching as he felt his body being encased by his girlfriend “Hello butterfly how was your day” His low voice spoke out as she gave him a bright smile “It was nice heaving the day off but i missed you Tama” she pouted as he gave her a chuckle, kissing her forehead “I missed you too, the office was a bore without my adorable secretary” Moving into their shared apartment Tamaki saw food already laid out in front of him “I ran you some bath water too” [ ] called out as she rounded the wall separating the kitchen and living room “Y-you didn't have to do that love im-” A finger silenced his pleas “Let me take care of you okay? You need your rest and i didnt want you to worry about anything coming home except relaxing and cuddling with me okay?” [ ] said as she stood on her tippy toes, kissing the top of his cheek “Tamaki Amajiki we have been doing this for years, won't you please let me love you without trying to outdo me ; you deserve it, you're a wonderful hero, you're my hero and eventually...you'll be our family hero..once we have one..” She trailed off as he stared at her, watching a sadden face appear over her features. Shaking it off as soon as it had appeared she gave him another smile “Its alright. There's no rush, i'm here for the long haul , me and you okay?” she said as she let his face go , heading to the couch “Now go go, hurry up before the food gets cold.” She teased as he gave her a soft look, coming over to kiss her cheek “Okay i wont argue butterfly”

These little things stuck with him, her caring ways, cooking for him, cleaning his office while hed be gone, even doing some of his paperwork while he was on parole. He loved her so much and enjoyed all of the little things here and there she did for him. He ddi the same, and each time made her cry, not out of being upset but for how caring he was to her. Bringing her roses, making sure she didnt have to cook if he could help it, spa days and doing more crafts and bonding with her whenever they could. But he realized while she helped him with so much he felt like he struggled. She struggled with her own issues too, similar to his. Sometimes she felt like she wasnt enough, she had her own anxieties and could get in a sup when she felt inadequate, unlovable and unwanted. But to him, to tamaki he loved everything about her, and she was one of the strongest people he knew. He felt motivated and glad to have her as the one he wished to marry , to have kids with, to start a family. But that also broke his heart when the topic came up she did usually didnt talk much about it, happily making plans but going back on them by saying ‘if i was a good mother’ She didnt want to dissapoint their future kids, didnt want to be a lacking mother or wife. As usual Tamaki came home, but htis time he went past the wonderful smelling food in the kitchen and to their bedroom, his cute girlfriend wrapped up in a blanket “How are you feeling butterfly?” He asked as she gave him a smile, reaching over to hug him “Im oaky! Just a bit overwhelmed is all, im sorry i passed out during the meeting..” She said as she gave him a hurt look before continuing “I shouldve tried harder to stay and present with you i-” Before she could finish he gave her a kiss, stopping her words “You needed rest. Im still surprised you got up to cook, did you at least take a nap love?” He asked as she shook her head , causing him to smile “Good. i love you butterfly and i woudnt change that for the world” he said as she smiled, giving him a hug “I’d hope so” She giggled as he pouted “Never doubt my love for you [ ], no matter what im gonna be here, i promise okay?” he said as she nuzzled the boy, kissing his nose “ And i for you Tamaki”

February came in , the happy couple had started up to take more time off to do more things and enjoy eachothers presence in the month of love. As the days went by Tamaki noticed [ ] was having odd days. From sleeping long hours of the day to just crying randomly, he knee something was wrong. Coming from the store he heard sobbing from their bathroom. Terrified , he tried to enter only feeling the door being locked “[ ] baby whats wrong? Can i come in?” with no response he nervously knocked again. “[ ] please...whats wrong” He pleaded as the door unclicked, showing his still beautiful but tear stained cheeked girl. “T-tama..” She cried as she just jumped into his arms, scaring the indigo haired boy “Baby are you okay?” he asked as she took in a breath before smiling sadly “Y-yeah i am..” She said as he picked her up, taking them into the living room. “I love you..and whatever is making you feel like this..if i can help let me okay?” Tamaki said as [ ] shook her head, placing it into his shoulder as they fell asleep.

Every day from her breakdown Tamaki came to her office with a rose, ate lunch with her and made sure she was hydrated and well. Once the week of valentines day came up, he had his plan set in motion. He had their schedules fixed, the week off for themselves as they did different things. A spa day the first day, a picnic the next, shopping at an expensive store for clothes. Then an art day where they drew (or tried to ) eachother and made art fro and about the other. Once the day of Valentines came however, it was different. It started with them taking a shower together, Tamaki cooking breakfast in bead for [ ] as they talked through the morning. Tamaki told her the outfits they ha gotten the days prior was for tonight which gave [ ] the jitters. She was excited for what her pro hero boyfriend had instore for them. Once they got to the restaurant all eys were on them. [ ]’s long black dress falttereed tamakis white suit and black bow tie. The two of them sat and started to eat, coversating with some fans who so happend to be around thwm. One was a small girl with wide hopeful eyes. She came to the couple with her mom in toe “Im so sorry to interrupt you two, my daughter wouldnt let mt husband and me rest until she came over to you guys” the wmoan laughed, causing bothe members to smile “Hello there how are you?” Tamaki asked the girl as she stepped from behind her mother “ H-hi my name is Shiemi a-and i really like you suneater!” The small girl said , causing [ ] , Tamaki and her mom to smile “Why thank you Shiemi, i hope im a good hero for you” Tamaki responded as the little girl shook her head “The best! Youre so cool. A-and your wife is pretty like mama! I like you dress miss suneater” The girl said , causing [ ] to stutter as she sipped her water “O-oh why thank you Shiemi but Im-” before she could continue she saw her boyfriend give the woman and her daughter a wide smile “She is, inst she?” He said as he turned to [ ] , moving from his chair “Tama what are you-” [ ] asked again as he leaned to the little girls ear , then to the mothers as they both gave him a smile, the woman happily shaking her head as her daughter followed the hero. Confused, [ ] watched as he picked the little girl up, putting her atop of the bar table “Hey everyone! Suneater has an announcement!” she yelled as most people turned around or to the table in the middle of the room, watching and smiling at the energetic child and pro hero “In fact I do, [ ] would you mind standing?” Tamaki asked as she gave him a wide eyed look, standing as he gave her a smile, extending and hand to her as she joined his side

“H-hey guys , as you know um..this si my lovely girlfriend and partner [ ]” He started as she gave everyone in the room a wary smile, her face feeling hot as he continued “ Ive known her for years, and weve been dating for some of those, she's seen me through thick and thin, helped me out in a pinch and made me feel like the strongest man alive, well next to almight…” he whispered as some of the people laughed, more paying them attention “And through all of this….i could think of a more beautiful and right person to spend the rest of my life with” And with the the young child handed the now kneeling man a ring as some whooped and hollered, others recording as both [ ] and the girls mother had tears in their eyes “[ ] [ ], the love of my life, my butterfly, i couldnt think of a more beautiful person inside and out to be with, will you give me the honor and make me the happiest man on this earth to be my wife?” He asked as the ring was revealed, diamond glistening as his own tear filled eyes looked to hers. Thinking her voice would fail her she shook her head yes, causing the room to yell as she had her ring put on her finger , jumping to hug her standing fiance as they hugged and cried, video of the engagement spreading as he thought to himself ‘I can now have my family, my endless love with you my dear butterfly’

As their wedding came , all of their friends and family came, including the new found friends of the young Shiemi and her parents. The ceremony went though flawlessly, Shiemi being their flower girl as the newlyweds ran down the easel , heading for their limo as they herded for the reception. The family spoke on how happy they were from their marriage, friends giving their comments on how they knew the couple would get married as the couple laughed at some stories and comments about their relationship. The night ended with so much love and joy for the new couple, startint their life together\

Two years went by before valentines day came again, three years to the day he had proposed arrived. Happily and ready to celebrate Tamaki woke up to his wife missing, hearing her fumble in the bathroom. Heading to the room he was shocked to she her in a disarray , eyes foggy as she met his “Tama...i have a surprised” She said as her teras fell down her face. Confused and still a bit tired , he gave her a look as she handed him a blue and while stick. The word pregnant snapped him awake as more tears started to fall, handing him two and three more all with the same small but powerful word “Im..gonna be a dad?” He asked as she smiled, shaking her head as she hugged the trembling girl “T-tama i'm gonna be a mom..what if i'm not good enough…” She sobbed as he cooed her, kissing her lips as his tears fell with hers “You're gonna be great Butterfly, i promise, you're gonna be so so great” He said as his heart swelled feeling her lips against his ‘This...This is forever , a love i wished for...and i couldn't have asked for more of a way to live my life...i love you butterfly’

[blarrghe]

Hi! I'm going to go for a dramatic one for the cliché prompts: "You’re in a coma and I confess all my feelings only for you to wake up" for Fenders (or whoever you prefer) if that works for you <3

I’m on a bit of a Dorianders kick and can’t seem to stop, so thank you very much for the prompt but I went a bit off book with it... hope that’s alright w you.

I altered this a little to “Dorian’s father is asleep on his deathbed and he confesses all his pent up feelings only for Anders to walk in”

So that’s um, how modern au Resident!Anders and Politician!Dorian met. It got a bit long and is very very angsty.

Summary: Anders is a resident working rough hours at a hospital (in Tevinter?? look this is just going to be a series of ficlets I have not worked out the details yet), struggling with his medical debts and work-related sleep deprivation. Dorian is an idealistic politician working his way out of his recently deceased father's shadow. They meet when Anders is attending to his father on his death bed, and things go from there, I guess.

--

Anders took a deep breath. With it, the something hissing over his heart settled down to a whisper. The hospital always beset him with inner whispers; not a good feeling, but one that compelled him on, nevertheless. Pediatrics hit the hardest, the injustice of it all, but being there also kept his mind steady. Doing something. Critical Care was different. There wasn't usually a lot he could do, in the Critical Care wing. And his rounds today had him facing that patient, the one for whom there was nothing to be done, and who set his obsessively helpful spirit into split ends, because he was also an absolute asshole. When Anders was in a room with him, under steely eyes and the cracking whip of his tongue, the disease in him felt deserved, and some part of Anders burned like blue fire, so hot it took biting his cheek bloody to restrain his bedside manner from bad attitudes. The disease is never deserved, he reminded himself and the licks of flame that still remembered the patient's rude barkings from last time. Even in rich men who in life had been given much more than they ever did deserve, a death like this one was still a hard death, and people who are dying are allowed to die angry. So he took another deep breath, because dealing with some patients just needed that much more breathing, but he could still do his job. And that was the job; to be there, at the end, for anyone.

He was getting worse, sleeping more. It wouldn't be long now, and Anders tried not to be relieved. He checked his charts, his monitors, the IVs still barely holding him up. Increased the morphine, for his pain, and finished without saying a word. For a moment, he almost missed it; at least when the man was swearing at him and ranting in indecipherably bigoted tirades, he was lively. He sighed, staying the extra moment to offer the man's sallow cheeks a sympathetic glance. Death was a natural part of life, and he was old, and an asshole, and maybe he didn't deserve it but... soon the bed would be free again, and that would be alright.

When he turned to leave, there was a dark figure sitting on the bench in the hall outside. He was reading a magazine but not flipping the pages, one leg crossed over the other in the stiff posture of someone who is uncomfortably waiting for uncomfortable news. One of the family. Anders took another deep breath. He hadn't had dealings with the wife, but he'd overheard them well enough. An unpleasant woman for an unpleasant man, trying to buy off death and then trying to kick the whole hospital down with her complaining when she couldn't. If the man waiting outside now took after either of them, his shift was about to get a whole lot worse.

He stepped out into the hall, and the man looked up from his magazine. His features were striking, sculpted. Skin the deep, radiant bronze that Anders was sure his father's would have been, back in his youth before misery and disease stole its colour. And he was, unmistakably now, his asshole patient's son; same steely grey eyes, right down to the faint creases beside them, and just as unfeeling.

"Are you his doctor?"

Usually, that question, asked at this point in the process of losing someone, was croaked out. But the son didn't croak, he asked his question with a continued lack of feeling, and a bit of impatience.

"Not his attending, only a resident. I can page the doctor, if you'd like,"

"No, that's fine. Can you just tell me how long?" The man stood up, tall. Much taller than the way people usually stood in hospital corridors; poised and proud in his posture — not actually taller than Anders, but he felt it. Still a little stiff maybe, but anything uncomfortable was covered up by how well he fit into his suit; smooth and black and clinging to his body like it was made to hold him. Anders blinked, "how long he has," the son clarified unnecessarily, still coolly impatient, "I have places to be, you see."

His eyes wandered past Anders, hesitating over the window to the room where his father lay dying, then snapping back again. Not entirely unfeeling after all, but the sadness in them was troubled by something else, still indecipherable. Anders wondered what kind of relationship a son could have with a father — a father like that — for so many secrets to be buried in that glance.

Anders swallowed. No he didn't, he decided, but the thing that whispered care into his heart was wondering, catching onto the well-hidden glimpse of feeling in the man, craving already to comfort the rest.

"A few days, maybe." He answered, gentle with the news. The son nodded once. "You should say your goodbyes."

The son was looking past him again, back through the window at the sleeping form of his father, more unhappy secrets set into his jaw. Anders watched the jaw tense, and stay there.

"In a few days, maybe." Replied the man, though he barely moved his tense jaw to say it. "He's awake."

Anders turned to follow the man's eyes, landing his own gaze on a twitching hand and barely moving bedsheets. He didnt look back again before darting into the room to offer his patient care.

"Dorian?" Croaked the patient, steely grey eyes opening to scan his face, and then closing in apparent disappointment.

"Your son? He's right outside, I'll —" but he wasn't. The tall, statuesque man was gone, the magazine left lying open on the bench outside in an empty white hallway. "I'm sure he'll be back soon." Anders amended, attempting to offer a bright spot of hope. His patient grunted.

Anders took a step away from the bedside, but as he did a thin, wrinkled hand shot out, and grabbed him by the wrist. The cold, unfeeling eyes opened, except now they were sad. "A word of advice, if you don’t want to be disappointed in life, don't have children." Even breathy and hoarse, he managed to give his voice bite. Then his asshole patient's gaze fell on the little gold earring hanging from Anders’ ear, and he coughed. Anders took a deep breath in preparation for another insult, and to help him recover from the bit of unfriendly advice. "You're lucky they don't let you people have them."

Anders tried not to sigh. The dying are allowed to die angry. "I'm sure he'll be back." He said again.

----

Dorian. The name stuck to him almost as well as his tight black trousers, and Anders couldn't help but turn it over a few times in his mouth after he left the room. He made the rest of his rounds, and checked back in on father-of-the-year Pavus a few more times, lying to himself about what he was hoping to find. Dorian. He never did come back though, not during visiting hours of that day, nor the day after. On the third day things weren't looking well, and Bride of Asshole Pavus had alerted everyone on staff to the fact that it was their fault, even the poor janitors. The bed would probably be free again by the end of his shift.

He made his rounds, thinking as little about that particular patient and his particularly unpleasant wife as he could, trying to tell his inner whisperings that it wasn't worth being sad over, even if the son never said goodbye. Maybe he didn't deserve one, how could Anders judge? (Everyone deserves one). Under his breath, Anders told himself to shush. (If not for the father's sake, then for his own). Again, shush. Then, through the too-thin walls and slightly ajar door as he made his way down the glaringly white hallway, Anders heard muttering. Sad, broken, angry muttering. He stopped.

" —I don't want it." the phrase was repeated a few times, some utterings angry, others sad, all of them broken. "I don't want your life. I don't want to be you. I don't —" Dorian. Dorian choking on a sob. Anders took a step back, careful about the squeak of his shoes. "I don't even know why I —" he tried not to listen in (no you didn't), but the door was ajar. "Everything. I could become everything you ever asked of me and it would still never be enough, so I don't know why I— I —" there was another heartwrenching choke to a stop, then a gutteral sound of frustration that Anders could feel in his own gut. "Just once. You couldn't say it just once?" It sounded like the kind of question he wouldn't be getting an answer to even if the man were conscious. "I'm sorry." Anders felt that in his gut too, and the thing he was trying to keep quiet inside him wondered if the words were from Dorian to his father, or the ones Dorian was begging his unconscious body for, or both.

In hospital rooms, the sound of beeping monitors disappeared into the fray. Wheels on stretchers trundling down the halls, squeaking shoes on linoleum, ventilators whirring and monitors beeping. They only sounded like anything when they stopped, and let out that one long note to signify the end. Dorian choked out his apology several more times, once sad, once angry, always desperate, and then the monitor stopped beeping, drowning out his gasps for air with its ending, and Anders had to do his job. He walked in.

Dorian shot up. Hands swiping at his red eyes and posture somehow rising without even a hint of hunch, and Anders pretended poorly not to see any of it. The attending came, procedures were followed, and Dorian disappeared into the waiting room like he was supposed to, without a look back.

The wife was gone by the time Anders poked his head into the waiting room. It wasn't his job to tell the family, and the news had long been shared, but something told him to peek in anyway. He took another deep breath when he saw him — this family really seemed bent on messing with his breathing — sitting, one long leg crossed over the other, staring down a terrible cup of coffee, not drinking it. He sat straight, his skin shone, his suit fit him like a glove and not a hair on his head was out of place, but he looked tired. Dorian. Anders approached cautiously. It would be a while before the family could take the body, and he should go home, rest. He told him as much, to a response of slow nods. Then Dorian looked up from his coffee, eyes emotionless except for the fact that they were lined in watery red.

"I'm just waiting for my mother to finish hounding her lawyers," he said, and despite himself Anders looked about nervously, "she's not here, don't worry. She left for home an hour ago. If I wait another, she'll have tired herself out and passed out under a bottle of wine." He sighed heavily, "could use one myself, but to be honest with you I don't quite feel like going home." His eyes flicked up into Anders' with a dim light of mischief, and Anders wondered what his looks could do for him on a good day. Things Anders could never hope to achieve, no doubt.

Anders offered him the carefully crafted soft smile he reserved for these kinds of things, and said “sorry for your loss” with just a touch more feeling than most patients’ families received, since the man looked like he needed it. 

“Can’t say the same to you I suppose,” Dorian replied, shaking his head, “though I am sorry.”

Anders opened his mouth, struggled to find anything to do with it, and then closed it again. 

“For my mother,” Dorian explained as he put the coffee cup he was still holding down on the low table in front of the chair he was decorating, apparently giving up any semblance of drinking it, “I’m sure his care was better than he deserved, but she doesn’t do well in situations she can’t control. It won’t come to anything.” 

Anders nodded slowly. Better than he deserved? A phrase Anders might have thought himself, over the past few weeks of dealing with the irate patient as he approached death’s door, but now that he’d gone through it, something about the sentiment irked him.

“Everyone deserves compassionate care,” he corrected with another careful smile, “the best chance we can give, and comfort when that’s spent. No less.” 

The response did something odd to Dorian’s face; first a sigh, then it transmuted itself into a strangled sort of laugh, while he shook his head and regarded Anders with still-dull eyes. “Well, it can’t have been easy,” he muttered, eyes landing on Anders’ soft smile, which he hoped was still there. “Thank you.” 

Anders left him then, offering one more nod and smile before turning away to finish the rest of his shift. Two hours later, changed out of his scrubs and into his tattered old jacket over his tattered old t-shirt and jeans, he walked by the waiting room again, on his way out. Dorian was still there, still staring down that same cup of undrunk coffee. 

“Mr. Pavus, ser?” 

Dorian started at the sound, and looked up from the coffee with an almost angry light in his icy eyes. “Please, Maker, call me anything but that.” 

Anders swallowed. “It’s — it’s Dorian, isn’t it?” Dorian nodded, “Dorian,” saying his name to his face felt wrong, somehow, “it’s getting rather late, is there someone I should call for you?” 

Dorian shook his head. “No,” he sighed. “Are there any bars nearby? A really terrible one, preferably.” 

Anders frowned, but there was a pretty terrible bar just across the street, stuck into a hole in the wall of an alley, with grimy old barstools and floors littered in peanut shells, so he told him so. Dorian stood, always so tall. 

“Thank you, Doctor…” 

“Anders,” he attempted a smile, but there was a good deal too much worry in it, he was sure, “just Anders; I’m off duty.” 

Dorian turned from him, then suddenly turned back. “Would you care for a drink, Anders?” 

Anders blinked. “I uh —” 

“You’ve seen the last of what was undoubtedly your worst patient today, haven’t you? Don’t tell me you didn’t plan to celebrate.” 

His brows creased unhappily, all on their own, and something inside him whispered back the memory of that broken bedside apology. “I wouldn’t —” 

“You should. I aim to. On me?” There was that light of mischief again, a little brighter, coupled with what could almost be a smirk. Maker, was he flirting? 

“I don’t drink.” 

Dorian frowned, and Anders almost wished he did. “A bowl of peanuts on me, then.” Dorian amended his offer with a shrug. And for some unknown reason, Anders nodded. 

“Alright.” 

[quinnfebrey]

I accept Mias apology wholeheartedly and honestly think it was really genuine and well considered.

The context of the situation was clear and it was made clear in the apology.

I believe in second chances and believe people should be able to learn from their behaviours and moderate them.

Forgiveness is a great thing.

almost every post Ive seen on the situation contains an absolute.. a huge assumption etc.... like Mia 100% new Azelia Banks was problematic (but what If she didn’t)? and Mia needed to challenge her friends behaviour publically (what if she didn’t feel she could as a white woman, what if she thought her Asian and black friends new better?!)

Jumping to conclusions about a persons behaviour and intentions is exhausting and the lack of ability to forgive people for making mistakes is just sad. We need to forgive our allies. Our allies are the people who also stand up for us when many people don’t!

How do we make the world better if we don’t teach people with compassion and love?

It’s clear Mia is a decent human with a lot of love for different minority groups. She seems genuinely kind, genuinely decent.

Why not just forgive her and focus more energy into people who actually mean to cause hurt, people who are deliberately racist.

I’m Asian by the way and I know I don’t speak for everyone but i genuinely believe she meant no harm and apologised beautifully.

not sure why you’re considering at an apology. i didn’t see the words “i’m sorry” anywhere. i didnt see any acknowledgment of why we were upset. i didn’t see any validation of that. if you haven’t, my full thoughts are here

i’m glad you were able to come to peace with what she said, and i would never try and convince you otherwise, but acting as though i’m a bad person for not accepting a cop-out statement from a racist apologist who did not stand up for us is bullshit and not welcome here. the way you choose to process it is your own. don’t project onto me

the asian community has taken a lot of shit from fandom and celebrities over the years, and it’s been swept under the rug because we allow it, and because we brush it off as micro aggressions that aren’t in the grand scheme of things a big deal. well, that attitude is how weve gotten to the point where racism against asians has been so normalized that we have violent hate crimes happening every day and nobody cares. so yeah, i’m done accepting the absolute bare minimum because they probably have good intentions

[is-that-another-soulmate-au]

Alrught so Modern soulmate AU bending is still a thing because I want it to be, sit down.

Soulmate AU: lock and key.

Everyone is born with either a lock or a key somewhere on them. The most common placements are the neck or the wrist. Some can be on their thigh, ankle, or even their waist.

Sokka has a key around both wrists

Suki has a key around her left wrist and a lock on her right

And Zuko has two locks on a single chain around his waist just above his hip bones.

Modern AU: looking for roommates.

Zuko put some 'looking for roommates' posters around town and gets a call from two people Sokka and Suki. He decides to meet up with them at his Uncle's tea shop (which I'm calling 'Dragon Insomniac' because I want it to be a 24hr teashop).

Now, onto the story:

"Zuko, you told them to meet up at 4 , its still 3" his Uncle said as he set down his nephew's cup of tea.

"I kno that Uncle, I just wanted to be ready for them" he fidgeted in his seat for a moment and readjusted the sleeves on his shirt out of habit.

"An extra hour of preparation before discussing roommates?" Iroh chuckled when Zuko nodded "alright, enjoy the tea, I'll show them to your table when they get here"

Zuko hummed a response as his Uncle walked off. Taking a drink of his tea he went over what he planned on saying to the duo when they managed to get to the shop.

Lost in thought he didnt even notice it had been a half an hour already, and only managed to resurface when he heard the little bell go off and two people walk in, a tall man with an undercut and his hair pulled back into a ponytail and a woman with shoulder length hair with the top half pulled back into a braid going down the back of her head. The man had a blue jacket on while the girl simply wore a green turtleneck sweater.

"Didn't expect us to come in at the same time, wonder which one he is" the man said while looking around

"Lets ask the man at the counter, I think he said his uncle owned the place" the woman pointed out

Ah, thats them. Interesting. Zuko let out a sigh and tried to swallow his sudden anxiety. He watched as his uncle directed the duo over to him and they both kind of stared at him for a second, turned to look st eachother and then back at him. Most people have that reaction due to his scar so he didnt find it unusual. He made a small wave and took a sip of his tea.

The two walked over and took their seats "Zuko?" The man asked as he sat down

"The one and only" he smirked a little "Suki and Sokka I presume?"

They nodded "yeah, so uhm, we actually know eachother from high-school" Suki motioned between her and Sokka

"Oh?" That was a little unexpected

"Yeah, I didnt know you meant this Suki when you told me her name, we haven't seen eachother in years!" Sokka chimed in

"Is the fact you two have a past together a deal breaker with being roommates?" Zuko rose his brow

"Oh not at all! It's a pleasant surprise to be honest" Suki chirped "we were two of the very few non-benders in the school"

"Oh? That's a relief to be honest. Last time I roomed with another bender they broke my gaming console" Zuko laughed

After they went over the agreements and signed some papers they all hopped into their cars and the duo followed Zuko to the apartment complex. Zuko gave them a mini tour and showed them his animals, that being a bearded dragon named Druk and two cats named Mushi and Lee

Before the end of the day Zuko handed them both keys to the apartment and sent them on their way to pack up, telling them he'd have their rooms ready by the next morning.

And he did, he had the rooms ready and organized with beds made (he totally went out and bought them both really nice bedsets in the colors they wore that day.) Laundry hampers, little bedside tables and a desk in both rooms, knowing through text conversations that Suki blogged and Sokka drew and carved.

Sokka was the first to arrive, having spent most of the night meticulously packing his items into boxes. "Wow, this is different than yesterday? Did you have this packed away?"

Zuko let out a snort "no, I went out and got the blankets and hampers after you two left, my Uncle had the rest of it in storage, I steamed the beds though so you don't have to worry about any dust or what have you."

Sokka raised a brow "you went all out huh?"

"Just being hospitable, I hope you like the bed set, I'll go start lunch, you down for burgers?"

"Hell yeah I'm down for burgers"

Zuko chuckled "alright, Ill get them started, when Suki gets here let me know."

Later on Suki arrived and she was just in time for lunch. Walking in and slipping off her shoes to set them on the small shoe rack Zuko set up, she sniffed the air "oooohhh whats that smell!"

"Zuko! Suki's here!" Sokka called

"Yeah! I could here that! Thank you though!" And with that said Zuko rounded the corner and made a little wave "Im making Burgers, do you want wheat buns, white buns or Brioche buns?"

"Brioche please, I like the apron" she giggled

He flushed "it was a gift from my uncle" the apron simply read 'look at these hot buns on the chef' and Zuko didnt want to get a new apron because he was afraid of hurting his Uncle's feelings

"He sure has a good sense of humor" she laughed

The rest of the day went smoothly and they all eventually went to bed around 11 that night. The next two weeks Zuko was busy working doubles at the teashop, Suki was busy working as a bouncer at Kyoshi Rise and Sokka was busy doing commissions and working at his dads flower shop, so it was kind of a blur.

The Saturday after the busy two weeks they all had off. Suki and Sokka were sleeping in while Zuko was taking the time to do some morning yoga, donning a pair of black yoga shorts and a red crop top as he did his stretches. The soul chain and locks hanging around his waist now visible to anyone who might see him. Though he was sure his roommates wouldn't be waking up any time soon.

Little did he know Sokka was leaned against the doorway to the kitchen watching his flexible roommate do yoga while sipping on a mug of coffee. "So thats where your soulmate thing is?"

"Ack!" Zuko lost his balance and collapsed on his mat "you twat! You could have waited until I was in a more stable stretch! Ow that really hurt" he rubbed his backside "and yeah, thats where my soul locks are"

"Locks? As in plural? I have two keys, Suki has a lock and key"

"Oh? Thats uh... interesting?"

"Whats interesting and what was that bang?" Suki yawned as she walked out of her bedroom

"Oh just the fact that we all happen to have two soulmates" Zuko said in a grumpy tone "and that bang was me falling because this jerk scared me while I was doing yo-"

"Woah, you're kinda hot" Suki blurted and turned red "sorry, ive just never seen you in a crop top. You're uh, well built" she cleared her throat awkwardly

Zuko froze and turned beet red "uh, thank you? I kick box and do yoga and that's about it" he then stood and stretched his arms above his head "anyways, do you guys want waffles for- agh! What are you doing?" He jumped back when Suki reached out to one of his locks

"Shush, one of your locks has a similar pattern my key I wanna try something" She brought her left wrist up to the lock "hey, what'd'y'know, it actually matches" she smiled but brought her hand back to her side "I guess I'm one of your soulmates huh?"

Zuko blinked at her and then looked to Sokka and then back to Suki "why didn't you unlock it then?"

She laughed "well if you have multiple soulmates you have to have both unlock at the same time, thats why me and Sokka lost touch after sch- Sokka come here real quick"

"Oh my gods" Zuko mumbled under his breath as Sokka came closer and brought his right hand up and smirked

"Would you look at that, weve been under the same rook for a total of two weeks and never noticed." The duo then looked at Zuko "would you be okay with us unlocking them?"

He nodded and watched them unlock his soul locks simultaneously and watched sokka unlock Suki's. His face was probably the same shade as his shirt when the chain sealed around his waist as a sort of tattoo instead of an actual chain.

"Well, this has been an interesting morning. But I have to restate my question, who wants waffles for breakfast?"

>should I continue this? I'm tempted, but im gonna end it here for now<

[themeed]

damn allowed myself to want things for a day and all i want is a van to live in, knowledge, freedom, weight loss, and a bass guitar.

im. happy with that i think. im proud of me, no jokes. im proud of being able to want things and care about them and vibrate towards them with longing. im... pleased with that. its fulfilling in a way Not Wanting For Anything isnt, because thats... kinda hollow. empty. in a vacant, lonely, yearning and grieving and SAD way. maybe because i Couldnt Want then. i Couldnt Desire or it would be used against me or taken away. that sucks. that sucked.

and now. im free to want again. and comparatively???? i think im very much never going to aim for buddhism or that weird Not Desiring Not Attached Nirvana mindset. like good for u but been there out of trauma and its not fun theres no reason to truly Live. u just float endlessly and experience and it aches so badly!!!! it hurts to want to want and not be able to. and i guess that is different from not wanting at all but... its not different enough for me to justify ever going back to that. or going forward to that. i just got this back and screw enlightenment if it means i have to give up on my passions i dont think life is worth living without it.

and anybody who looks down on that from a spiritual tower has yet to examine their own pride and how empty they feel without it.

anybody who looks down and smiles and wishes me luck on my journey? good for them. im glad theyre living their best life, on their journey as they see fit.

and i feel the need to protect myself because ive been hurt by the pride- the arrogance of others before. a lot of my hurts and traumas stem from my mother being too prideful to recognize that she can be wrong and someone under her power could be correct over her. and it was an uncomfortable truth. so she denied it was one at all and hurt me. i know the reason could be elaborated on. she didnt want to confront her own internal logic. or trauma. or even doublethink. that doesnt excuse her hurting a child for the sake of her sense of pride, of comfort, of self-worth. a child under her power, that she claimed to be parent of. teacher of.

not owing anyone anything is not the same as not hurting anyone. i havent reconciled that yet. oppressors should be held accountable for their mistakes, and give reparations if the harm is physical at LEAST. and i think that applies to politics, yes. privately though? if i beat up a nazi, i dont want to pay for his hospital bills. my personal philosophy struggles between equating people and ideas as a worth measurement, and realizing that that line of thinking is... similar to oppressors. but. its based on something people can change. the question is, do i think "if given the opportunity" is a good enough reason to stop and question a racist that runs their mouth? and do i think pre-emptive violence is okay? if say, a nazi walks into a bar and doesnt say anything but is wearing all the red flags and bells and whistles. i dont think that justifies a beatdown. being asked to leave, sure, but the beatdown doesnt start til the first remark flies.

once the intent is given OR the action is taken, the line is drawn. doesnt matter if they Havent Had The Chance. if theyre starting shit outside of debate spaces like that, and not, say, asking questions, theyre not looking for new perspectives, and it is NOT my job to educate people. its not my job to Show People The Light. a quick fucking google search could tell them why theyre wrong. if they havent put even the most basic energy into questioning their beliefs, thats on them.

it sounds like im trying to absolve myself of blame here. largely because. i think i should go out and help educate people because theyre inherently complacent if theyre, yknow, in a position of power. aka white folk and men and rich folk and cis folk and on and on and on. these people dont live my reality. they dont live the reality of a gay black man in the south, or a genderqueer lesbian in the west, or an indigenous woman whose nation is being targeted, or a muslim woman who cannot wear her headcoverings in the face of danger of death, or an asian immigrant who cant get a job because of COVD age discrimination resurging. we will never live each others realities, but we can become aware of them.

they wont come into awareness without someone asking or telling, and then doing something to change them.

we shouldnt need to go running to people in power for them to be aware of problems in the populace, govt is supposed to help and solve issues like this. like. actively. thats the whole point, make life better for the countrys citizens. and individuals in a position of social power...

are individuals who didnt take on a responsibility to protect and serve or otherwise care for the populace of a nation. i personally think they SHOULD care, but they are not obligated to. i cant make them care about others.

and honestly, on some of them, it would be a waste of time. there are people who want to change or question things and yknow what? they seek out answers. in people or places or online usually. stats and stories.

so like. i dont think someones Potential as a person matters when theres a throwdown about to happen. it really isnt my responsibility to save people from themselves or try to change their sides against their will. if they want to chat about it they can ask questions first.

not throw insults or punches or hatred.

what people have been taught is worth analyzing and trying to correct IN SOCIETY but i cant fix every broken white boy that comes to me. PSAs, fliers, outreach, online videos, debate spaces. those are things i already have access to and can be a part of if i really want to go around changing minds. or yknow. get involved in legislation and be myself around others to change their perceptions of whats socially acceptable or normal. maybe protest, maybe call congressfolk, etc.

but not every comment has to be analyzed or a learning opportunity. im allowed to shut it down, and people can respect that or stop talking to me. this isnt my parents house where i had to justify everything that i said or did when scrutinized, and doubly justify any criticism i had of mother, or any joke i frowned at instead of smiling.

these people dont have that power over me. they arent my mother. they arent my boss, and if they are i can fuck off and get a new job if necessary. they dont have financial control over my living space and food and schooling and physical control of where i can go and with who and for how long. I CONTROL THAT. I do.

Huh. maybe thats why i want a van so bad. i mean... when this lease ends if nobody is gonna end up living with me...

i could just... live in my car and shower at truck stops. get a storage unit for my stuff. save by driving jobs. like 40 to 60 a day. tear out my cars back, insulate it, and install my mattress pad there. water on the floor, cooler next to it, wooden cutting coard, knife, single camping plateware set, and another little shelf for spices. maybe a hot plate i can hook up to the car battery? get a long enough usb and it might be doable. i could go camping and open the trunk to just... vibe.

because yeah, honestly? i dont plan on having a solid apartment for a bit. like a long bit. and i still have like 70000 miles on my car before itll want to go. and by that point, even at like 100 miles a day, thats like 2 years, less if i go cross country in that vehicle. i could save up SO MUCH for a better vehicle, or like. college. live on campus, get some credit, continue working after i figure out want i want to do.

i think thats a solid plan, even if i dont get another apartment and put everything in storage. work as i need to instead of all the time for rent, really only paying for gas, car repairs, car ins, food, and phone data/hotspot internet... that would bring my monthly expenses down to like 500 a month max instead of like 1400. id only need to make some 1000 a month doing contract stuff to save for taxes and stuff. anything extra would be just that: extra for savings and things. holy shit.

depending on how this next month goes for my friends, holy s h i t.

i. i might do this. legitimately.

i. dont think i can yet. i need proof of address to get my license im pretty sure? but hey, thatll be my 21st this year, so. once i have that i wont need a new address for a While. i dont know if ill want one, really.

i could always just ask a friend or family member if i could use theirs for mail that cant go to a PO box.

anyway. yeah. wow.

[shhh-no-ones-home]

for the road (2/2) steve clark x reader

+++++++++

part 1 part 2

sorry this took so long, like i had mentioned in the other post, our internet cable was cut and it took a few days for it to get fixed. on top of that i had a few essay finals to finish and just didnt have time to get back to this. it is here now though and i hope you all like it!

she edited for the most part but if i missed anything, sorry, lol.

again i dont usually add songs from the artists to their own chapters but i think this one works pretty good with the story so youre getting it anyways lol

Song: stagefright by def leppard

tag list: @cynic-spirit @lifeisabitchandsoareyou

+++++++++

as soon as i turned around from locking the shop there was a taxi outside, parked on the curb with a woman leaning against it. she offered me a smile.

"are you y/n?"

she asked and i nodded.

"the band is waiting for you."

she said opening the door for me. i politely thanked her before sliding in and buckling the seat belt. the car smelled like apples, making me feel much less nervous than before. the ride to the venue was pretty silent though and i watched out the window as we passed by the tall city buildings. as the venue came into view my eyes got wide, i had never actually been to this part of town before. I looked at the venue in awe, it was much larger than the places I usually attended concerts at. the metal gates opened in front of us and she drove in, straight to the back doors. a large man in all black was waiting there with his arms held together in front of him. i was definitely back to being nervous again. he opened the door and peered down at me.

"You here for Steve?"

He asked and I nodded, pulling the ticket out of my pocket and showing it to him.

"yeah uh, he gave me this."

he looked over it before helping me out of the cab.

"Right this way."

He said, hand moving to be placed gently at my back as we walked inside the venue. I was a little unnerved at first, being alone with the man and all but marched along anyways. the halls were brightly lit as we walked, the white concrete shining against the floor tiles. i watched as roadies and crew members walked around us, gaining my attention as the man kept pushing me forward. When he reached a door at the end of the hall I smiled, seeing Steve sat against the couch's arm rest with his guitar in his hand.

"Here we are."

The man said, dropping his hand from my back and standing firmly beside the door. He never looked back at me as I stepped into the room shyly. I waved to the guys before Steve noticed me.

"Y/n!"

He said excitedly, standing and offering me a hug. I gladly took it before he escorted me to sit at the couch.

"Was the ride here alright?"

He asked and I nodded.

"Yeah, for the most part. Thanks again for inviting me. I'm excited to see you guys play!"

I said, wide smile on my face.

"I'm happy to hear that, i really hope you like it. we've been working on something new for the set."

i made an impressed face.

"sounds exciting."

then i heard one of them laugh.

"you say that like shes seen our other sets."

he had darker curly hair.

"so?"

steve said sitting a little closer to me, his arm falling behind my back to rest on the couch.

"im sav."

the man offered his hand and i shook it.

"y/n."

steve cleared his throat.

"right, thats rick savage he plays bass, my partner in crime phill collen, plays guitar, rick allen who is our man behind the kit, and of course you already met and talked to joe elliot our lead singer."

they all offered hellos around the room as steve introduced them.

"its nice to officially meet you all, i appreciate you guys coming into the shop earlier. i put the record in the window after you left and six people stopped in to buy a copy."

i joked, making steve laugh lightly.

"happy to help."

sav said. then a man with a clip board and mic around his neck stepped in looking rushed.

"alright guys its time to mic up, its almost show time."

they all nodded before leaving the room one by one to follow the man.

"hey ive gotta go but ill be back right before the show starts so you can come with us to the side of the stage okay?"

i nodded as he stood.

"okay."

he touched my shoulder lightly before walking off. i sighed to myself for a second before getting up and walking around the room. it was super neat. the painted bricks were covered in signatures from all sorts of rock stars. they were littered about in varying colors of permanent marker, some of them with small messages and dates next to them. part of me wondered how long it would take to fill before they had to paint over it or start on a new set of walls. then i heard a knock at the door, it was steve with a guitar now around his neck.

"hey, you ready for the show?"

he asked with a wide smile.

"lead the way."

i said stepping out of the room and following him back down the hallway.

"so i know this isnt exactly date material but how are you so far?"

i let out a short laugh.

"im doing great, this is all fantastic."

he seemed content with that answer as we stepped up to the side of the stage.

"im glad to hear that. if you arent busy afterward would you maybe wanna go get something to eat? before we have to head out?"

i twisted my body a little in excitement, holding my hands in front of me, smiling like an idiot.

"id love that."

he touched my arm gently.

"great!"

i leaned forward and kissed his cheek lightly, making him blush.

"alright guys, showtime."

the man who had called them out earlier was back, ushering them into a line.

"ill be here when youre done."

i said, earning a nod from him. i watched as they all ran out one by one, the crowd screaming as the backtrack blared through the speakers. they all just lit up as they began playing, joe speaking into the microphone and asking how the crowd was feeling. it made be giggle, not being to contain my excitement anymore.

°°°°°°°°°

when the set was done steve was quick to get offstage and into a new set of clothes. he was all sweaty under the stage lights during the show so i could understand why. he had grabbed my hand and practically ran with me down the hall and out the back door, making me laugh. when we were in the cab i had arrived in he calmly told the woman where to take us, his arm making its way behind me to hold me around my waist. the drive to the late-night restaurant was filled with small conversation and light smiles, he really was an interesting person. when we pulled up he helped me out of the cab and walked with me on his arm inside.

"two?"

the waitress asked, him nodding and following her to a booth across the diner.

"so, what can i get you two to drink?"

she said, setting the menus down. i looked at her and smiled.

"coffee please."

she nodded and looked to steve who look at me a little curiously.

"two coffees i suppose."

he let out a short laugh before she walked away.

"its a little late for coffee dont you think?"

he asked, looking over the menu. i sent him a look.

"says the person who ordered one as well."

he laughed and shook his head.

"i guess we all have our vices huh?"

i smiled at him, looking over the menu.

"hey, ive been meaning to ask you-"

"you two ready or do you need some more time?"

i looked from steve to her.

"cheese fries please."

i said, handing her the menu as she wrote it down.

"same."

he said with a smile, handing her his menu too. she nodded before walking away.

"now, what was it that you wanted to ask?"

he folded his hands together and leaned into the table, giving me his full attention.

"well i was wondering what the rest of tonight would look like."

i laughed light heartedly.

"its not exactly like you guys are staying here. i know you said it was a date, and i really like you but i dont necessarily wanna have too much fun, ya know?"

he nodded slowly, the waitress bring us our food and us thanking her.

"ive kinda been thinking about that too. and i really like you too and would love for this to happen."

he motioned between the two of us.

"but i dont want to make you wait for me."

i laughed a little bit as i ate.

"i dont think id mind too much. waiting that is, ive been single this long its not like it would be much different."

i joked, making him smile at me as he took a drink.

"so, what? we do this? for real? keep in contact until tour is over and then what?"

i shrugged.

"we make it work."

i said matter-of-factly. he studied my face for a second.

"okay, so we're really doing this."

he said with a wide smile. i nodded.

"i guess we are."

then it hit me.

"oh, here!"

i grabbed one of the survey cards out of the napkin holder and began writing.

"heres the numbers you can reach me at. the top is my house and the bottom is the shop. if you need me ill be at either of those places."

he looked over it before folding it and stuffing it into his pocket.

"hopefully you dont get too tired of me before tour is over."

we both laughed.

"i dont think i will, if you wanna call everyday be my guest. id love to hear about the places you visit. makes my small corner of the world a little bit bigger."

he sent me a genuine, heart melting smile.

"then i will absolutely do that for you y/n."

we both finished our drinks and got up, taking the ticket to the register and him paying the waitress. we said our thanks before climbing back into the cab out front. the drive back to the venue was full of cuddles and soft touches, talking back and forth about what he would be doing and where he would be going in the next couple weeks. it all sounded so interesting and i wished i could go with him. when the cab came to a stop at the back door we both got out, his hands making their way to my waist as i leaned into the car.

"ill be looking forward to seeing you next month."

he said softly, pushing my hair out of my face.

"likewise."

i said back, looking over his face. he seemed so soft. his thumb grazed my cheek before he leaned down and kissed me gently. the moment our lips met i knew that was it. the wait would be worth it for sure. when he pulled away we both sighed as he rested his forehead against mine.

"ill for sure be looking forward to another one of those."

he joked, both of us smiling at each other like a couple of teenagers.

"well then, before we both have to go, heres one for the road."

i said before pushing forward quickly, kissing him again. it was deeper than before as he pulled me into him. i wanted to feel that forever. when the back door creaked open we both pulled away, it drawing his attention as the body guard stood there sternly.

"i guess thats my queue."

he grabbed my hands as he backed up, dropping them as he got further away. i watched him walk to the door, waving back to me before he was ushered inside. i covered my mouth for a second before bouncing up and down with excitement. i could wait a month, if that was the hardest part of this then surely i could handle it. and now i had tour adventure stories to look forward to. i smiled like an idiot as i slid back into the cab, telling her where to take me. i couldnt stop smiling the entire car ride. i couldnt wait for the month to be up.