#and let black lesbians have something to ourselves

[princessefemmelesbian]

Me when an article says that “stud” is for “Black and Latinx(sic) lesbians”: 

[cator99]

I was so weird about lesbian sex for a long time because when I was 14 I hooked up with an older girl at bible camp and suddenly got my period during it and I was so embarassed but she didn't care so we kept going and then I suddenly got a severe nosebleed for no reason while I was on top of her kissing her and you can imagine how that went so there was my blood everywhere all over both of us and this sounds like I'm making shit up but it was insane and k i was panicking but she was like all about it so we just kept going and like it was too late, there was already blood on both of us! Like all over us. and I thought it was kind of powerful. so I let myself get blood all over the cabin. we were feverish. At first I just let my nosebleed drip on the floor and we both laughed like fuck this place yeah lets get blood everywhere. And we did. This is just what makes us girls. We had this cabin entirely to ourselves too for 3 whole nights!! They didn't check on us in there even once!!! Not even the counselors wanted to be near us- we had wanted to be alone and not participate in the religious activities so we told everyone we were sick, however the absolutely insane family who single-handedly ran the camp (the mom was rarely seen of course but the dad was this freaky cult-leader type preacher named Greg, and they had ummmm I think 15 kids or something, most of whom were adults, so they had no issue running this camp on an acreage they owned with very little outsider involvement) genuinely thought we were just posessed by demons, and in response they gave us our own cabin in order to ensure that we were kept away from the other kids there. Major oversight on their part and also sounds illegal but I could tell they were scared shitless of me (weird hair I cut and dyed myself, 3 lip piercings, septum ring, mid kandi kid phase so I had rainbow bracelets up past my elbows) and the girl (who had a jugalette tattoo and was the only black girl at the camp, I think ever)... I ended up getting banned from bible camp for other reasons... lesbian sex blood rituals aside....... (a kid saw me smoking something in a pipe and snitched, and they thought it was weed but it was so obviously just mint tea...) yeah after that I was like "was god punishing me for being a lesbian by making me bleed everywhere during sex oh god I'm going to hell forever and ever waaah" because even though I didn't believe in that shit in any real way at all I still had raging paranoia about being punished for being gay... regardless I came to the conclusion that if all that bloodshed was the price of homosexuality then I'd just have to learn to enjoy it. And I was so right for that . But yeah when I did have sex again after that I was like Ok hellooooo God where is the blood are u there God...???

[blacksapphhicmaddonna]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH, ALPHABET MAFIA

just a few reminders:

- first pride was a riot

- black & BIPOC queer people are the foundation of our entire nation and the global culture

- we owe most of our rights and progress to BIPOC trans women/femmes and different communities of lesbians, trans/gnc folks and elders.

- trans people have always existed, they are ancient and indigenous to many cultures and places and are SACRED.

- I’m glad you’re here and there is community out there for you, waiting with open arms. Don’t give up just yet, please.

- rainbow capitalism isn’t liberation

- we are all we have, be fucking better to each other

- lesbians have done so much for lgbtqia+ people and should maybe idk stop being erased for no reason

- biphobia is real and just bc your ex cheated on you doesn’t make it bi folks fault, you’re projecting babe

- being queer doesn’t dissolve white privilege, pls touch grass

- be safe at pride. they’re coming for us all and we need to protect ourselves.

- not everyone wants to use the word queer/dyke/fag etc. I’m glad you reclaimed the slurs used against you, me too, but not everyone wants to and you need to respect that. LGBTQIA+* exists for a reason.

- the black and brown belong on the flag.

- the A is for asexual/romantic or agender, not ally.

- get some pussy (or whatever you do (or don’t do)) and make space for joy! because black/queer joy is revolutionary and fucking righteous just as much as our anger is, too

- Juneteenth coming up too, issa parade in my city fr

- asexuals/aromantics belong at pride. Period. Full stop.

- safe sex is the best sex

- get tested!

- it’s okay to not watch the news. america is hell, go take a nap

- people 100% know themselves better than you ever will, people are who they say they are and you don’t get to decide that for them. respect pronouns, identity, etc. or argue w ya mama/god/someone else cause it ain’t finna be me ❤️

- you deserve relationships that feel safe and actually are safe. Don’t settle.

- learn your queer history. they won’t teach us. they took our elders from us.

- Black LGBTQIA+* history IS Black History.

- we all need to be thankful to the house mothers and the ballroom scene and those who gave us what we have now, regardless of who you are.

- don’t call yourself a stud if you’re not BLACK. wit a capital B and at least one BLACK parent.

- not everyone is out. happiest of pride month to y’all. you’re still gang and we love you just as much. 💗

- our collective liberation lies in the fact that we are all tied to each other. if you’re down for the gays but not the theys, you’re not as decolonized as you think you are.

- shout out to fanfiction writers who have been single-handedly providing queer art/content/representation for years while the industry continues to make a mockery of us or intentionally leave us out. one thing we gonna do is help someone find their queer awakening, and get that story right. love us 🤪 go team

- your life means something. it’s important beyond comprehension. you look good. your ass is fat (if you want it to be). get the mullet as a lil treat.

- LGBTQIA+* people across the board have ALWAYS existed in literally every culture and every continent (and Antarctica counts if you count the cute lil gay penguins😌). Don’t let them tell you different. We are not a “mInOrItY”, we have been MINORITIZED. we are not small, we are great and mighty and have ALWAYS been here. And we always will. We exist in the future just as we have existed in the past. We stand on the shoulders of MASSIVE collective ancestors. If that’s not an indication to keep going, keep fighting, keep laughing, dancing, voguing, and keep showing up authentically - then I don’t know what is.

- it’s gonna be ok baby. pinkie promise.

[wolfangst]

The Postal dude hates everyone equally!

Hello, all Postal fans, I'm with you! I love the "scissor running studio", I've played through all of their games, some several times. I attend almost all of Vince Desi's interviews and support his work, like many of you.

I wanted to write this post because I have been in the Postal community for quite a long time and have seen a lot of people, a lot of conflicts, one of which appeared literally "recently". Dude hates transgender people? The situation is funny - some person made a post in the style: “Your favorite character *insert sentence*”, where the Postal Dude was added with the inscription: “The Postal Dude is transphobic” - the developers, on behalf of the Twitter account, said that this was not:

Later, the next day, the developers released a post in which the Dude was introduced to us as a misanthrope - a person who hates everyone equally. Which was pretty obvious even without this, because people who play the Postal series of games could repeatedly hear this line from him: “I hate everyone equally” or something like that - this was obvious back in 2003.

So what could such an act on the part of the developers mean, what did they want to say by first “supporting” transgender people with their words, and then releasing this post as if they had renounced their words? This means that he hates everyone: whites, blacks, Jews, gays, lesbians, transgender people and other completely ordinary people who live their lives. Not because he hates anyone in particular, but because he hates all humanity - read the meaning of misanthropy on the Internet.

The dude is an asshole and you're ready for this conversation!

Please remember that the Postal Dude is a bad person. He is a terrorist who kills innocent people - going back to the first Postal, the original, he wanted to kill even children and he was not ashamed. He is not the kind of person who will support someone simply because of their oppression in society - he is deeply indifferent to the problems of modern society, such as: the oppression of black people, sexism towards women, unfair mistreatment towards LGBTQ+ people, etc.

He hates everyone, regardless of lifestyle, sexual orientation or anything else - deal with it, he is not a good guy, but a sick person with a thirst for blood. Postal is the wrong game, Dude is the wrong character - and that's the whole point of the franchise we love so much. The game makes fun of a lot of things, it was made based on a real-life case of terrorism by a postal worker and the proposed idea of ​​creating a "just a cruel person who kills for no reason" appealed to Vince Desi - that's why we have a person as cruel and controversial as the Dude in game. Let's remember that in addition to the fact that the Dude has repeatedly expressed in his remarks that it is best to kill women and national minorities first, he also kills men, women, kids and animals without a twinge of conscience - and can even kick his beloved dog. We are talking about a character about whom the developers themselves speak as someone who is a terrible person at his core - so why do many of us try to humanize him, to find something good in him, some advantages or support for others?

Have you forgotten that in the Postal 2 before the update with multiplayer, there was a mini-game called: “F*ag Hunter”, the essence of which was that the Dude needed to kill 20 LGBTQ+ Representatives, and if he killed a heterosexual NPC, then he was forced go through again?

We are all people, we are all different. There are many different people within our community: gays, lesbians, transgender people, people of different nationalities and views on life - and this is wonderful. It’s wonderful that we are all so different and live in a world where we can be ourselves. But please remember that the Dude would hate us no matter who we are, simply because we are part of a society he despises - and you have to live with that. Yes, this is bad, it’s very offensive, but you are part of a game community where the main character is a terrorist who uses hard drugs and dismembers kittens.

If you want to feel support and love in your direction, then Paradise is definitely not for you. And don't try to argue with it - the Dude can't be fixed. Thank you for your attention, I love and respect everyone - after all, I’m not the Dude from Postal!

I also want to add that you can have any headcanons, ship the Dude with your characters or create your own Dudes - this is very cool. This post was written as an appeal to people who forget about which game community they are in - there was a lot of negativity on Twitter under sub-posts from the developers simply because such a misunderstanding arose, which seemed to me simply stupid and to some extent funny. This is the internet guys, do what you want, just please don't romanticize or think the things The Dude does are normal or laudable

[tommykinard6]

I don't mean to pile onto your bad day but I've been seeing a lot of creators on tiktok complain/compare the bucktommy and henren tags/fic count on ao3 because there's almost more bucktommy fics then there are henren fics. The number one claim is always that bucktommy writers are racist because we don't write for henren. But like, that's not correct at all? People can write fanfiction for whatever they want to. If they want to see more henren stuff then they can write it on their own.

We can coexist without fighting each other. I'm just tired of people screaming about how bucktommy is anti this or anti that, when we're just vibing by ourselves and don't want the drama but the drama finds us anyway because Sucky People are loud and get heard the most.

You’re good, anon. It actually gave me something to think about during work.

As a quick disclaimer, before we begin, I’m not a POC. I am not speaking for anyone in the Black community and am not attempting to speak over them. My following thoughts are as a queer woman-ish who is also a writer.

I think it must be noted that Hen and Karen have been overlooked since day one. The fact that Buck coming out made it the “gay firefighter show” when we’ve had a beautiful canonical lesbian couple since the very beginning? Is only proof. Is this proof of racism in the fandom? Maybe. Quite possibly. I would argue that it comes from a misogynistic point as well.

If you look in any fandom, regardless of the color of their skin, any wlw ship is horribly overlooked. I’ve done some tag searching on ao3. Straight and mlm ships battle for dominance while there are canonical and fanonical wlw ships that have a drastic difference in numbers. This isn’t a good thing. But it’s an experience that spans fandoms.

I find it sad that BuckTommy has almost more fics, with only two episodes under their belt, than Henren with 7 seasons. However, this isn’t a reason to hate on BuckTommy. The ship didn’t do anything wrong. Comparison is the thief of joy and it’s also rage bait. I think that some creators simply are using anything they can to hate on BuckTommy. Which that makes it sadder, that they aren’t concerned about Henren other than pushing their own agenda.

This isn’t to say all creators who are speaking about this are doing this, but I guarantee some are.

Now, let me speak as a writer.

As someone with 62 published fics on ao3, I write almost exclusively mlm ships. This isn’t because I hate women. And as a queer woman-ish, don’t even start about homophobia. But for some reason, I find it so much easier to write men than I do to write women. This is true for straight and wlw ships and also just in general. I love Henren, but I don’t have the faintest idea about how to write them.

It’s hard enough to write as it is and I’m already writing on ships that are easy for me. I try to write women and it just hasn’t come out right. I want to challenge myself, branch out, and maybe I’ll write for Henren to do that. But I say all this to point out that for some people like me, writing some ships and demographics of ships are just a little more difficult.

That leads me into something else.

I, as a white person, worry about accidentally writing non-white characters wrong. And this was reinforced not too long ago when we had that whole thing on ao3 with deliberate racism in 9-1-1 fics. If anyone has resources or advice for writing non-white characters, I would love to hear that! The last thing I want to do is cause any harm.

I feel like I’ve spoken a lot about me, but that’s because I can’t really speak for anyone else. I can only speak from my experience.

We already have a ship war between BuckTommy and Buddie. We don’t need to pit more people against each other. I think we can love BuckTommy while agreeing that Henren needs to be seen and appreciated and treated equally.

End note to say: I tried to speak as delicately and as sensitively as I could, but if anything came out wrong, please feel free to point it out (kindly). Again, I speak for no one but my very little section of the world. I’m interested to hear what people of other backgrounds have to add!

[vampireistic]

“annoying gays” aren’t the problem.

the problem with “straight” self-entitlement

the anime/gaming community isn’t known for being very lgbt friendly (the amount of times i’ve been threatened with SA because i’ve called a character zesty is actually psychotic) and to be fair, posting something like this to a website known for being infested with us gay critters seems silly, but i think it’s something worth a discussion.

overall, i want to go over a couple fandoms that i’m deeply engrained in that i’ve personally experienced the shittiest takes with: honkai star rail, genshin impact, jujutsu kaisen.

────────────────────────

“i hate ___ fandom”, do you? or do you hate the fact black and gay people exist in the same space as you? “oh it’s the shippers! they’re weird”, yeah i won’t deny a minuscule percentage are, but do you really think that overshadows the fact the CN part of the genshin community KILLED kittens because they hated scaramouche, the creepypasta fandom saw the emergence of several murderers that varied in concerning age, not to even mention the amount of l*li art that gets made using the excuse that the character is “akshually 500+!” — believe me, these are more egregious sins than simply: “they ship boy and boy so i don’t like.”

“FANON” VS “CANON”

some of you can’t differentiate between: “this makes me uncomfortable” and “this is wrong”.

“headcanons are losing their meaning”, “i miss when headcanons didn’t make sexualities their entire character” — what is it with people being upset that others are finding comfort in portraying themselves in a character they enjoy? “it ruins the character!”, “you’re belittling them and ignoring their backstory!”, how come these are the responses only queer people get?

it’s ok to not like it but you also have to acknowledge that it’s completely harmless and in the grand scheme of things, doesn’t matter. “you’re making it all about sexualities”, “you can’t make everything gay” etc etc — those are just basic homophobic rhetorics. gay people have been demonised in media excessively, of course we want to MAKE representation for ourselves if we aren’t going to get any canonically.

queer people shouldn’t have to be digestible to you and what you like for you to not have a hissy fit that they merely headcanoned a fun character as having xenopronouns. using the excuse that: “oh well, i’m also queer!”, is ridiculous, being part of the community doesn’t absolve you from any type of lgbtphobia. do you really think the straights are gonna come accept you with tears in their eyes because you’re not like those other fags?

────────────────────────

“SHIPPING CULTURE”

getting mad at queer people for not liking straight ships should be a form of comedy. throughout all those decades of entertainment, queer people have been given mere crumbs of what straight people have — why is it expected that we need to absolutely suck up and also enjoy something that we’ve already been force fed our entire lives? this sort of idea is a little predatory, in my experience at least, this rhetoric is the reason i used to HATE even entertaining the idea i could be a lesbian just because it was so disconnected from other sexualities where most revolved around some sort of attraction to men; i feel like this isn’t necessarily that uncommon of a situation either.

this sort of conversation surrounding the concept of “heterophobia” just sparks immediate homophobic rhetoric that intends to make queer people like some villainous group that’s goal is to gayify every straight ship in existence. no-one actually cares, you’re just upset because gay ships tend to get more talked about in fandoms because they’re well liked.

let queer people enjoy solely mlm/wlw media or pairings without making them feel othered or like a “fujoshi” for something normal. if i have to sit here and listen to why you think god should personally make mitsuri and obanai real so they can have a real wedding then you can handle me just stating “idk i think satosugu is good”. i can’t tell you the amount of times my own friends have made me feel weird or icky for watching things that relate to me because i specify i won’t read or watch romance stories with a hetero pairing — like i trusted y’all once with violet evergarden and look where that ended up…

“you’d like ___ if it was gay” / “you only hate ___ because it’s straight” … yeah, because i’m gay dumbass. why the fuck should i pour my energy into a straight pairing i can’t at least resonate with somewhat. there are some exemptions to this rule and i will forever be a hanako kun and nene lover — but that’s purely because they’re a straight ship written for gay people. and it’s actually quite easy to discern the difference between “straight pairing that’s intended for large audience” vs “straight pairing that’s intended to appease fans / soothe the lonely lowlifes who have never touched a woman”

the former being: hanako kun x nene, quite literally any pairing from disney movies, loid x yor, haruhi x tamaki… okay i’m out — and the latter being ANYTHING from the following animes: darling in the franxx, bunny girl senpai, my dress up darling, toradora etc.

also to add onto the whole “you’d like so and so if they were gay”, y’all would absolutely believe ships like satosugu, beigguang, acheswan, eimiko etc were canon if they were m/f pairings.

“QUEER CODING / IMPLICATION”

i don’t understand why this specific topic is so heavily discussed in such a negative manner — if there’s specific references to queer things in relation to a character, it’s obviously intentional. what’s the issue? that it’s gay?

queer coding has long been a subtle yet powerful tool in media, particularly in anime and video games. it involves the inclusion of characters whose traits, behaviours, or relationships suggest a queer identity without explicitly stating it. this coding allows for nuanced representations of lgbtq+ identities in contexts where direct representation might be risky or censored. two franchises where queer coding is evident are genshin impact and jujutsu kaisen.

however, the appreciation of this representation often gets lost in a quagmire of "canon versus fanon" discourse, particularly among straight fans, who degrade these characters and their relationships to fucking “shipping debates.”

“they’re just friends — have you never interacted with a friend before?” / “not everything has to be romantic / gay”

i don’t remember the last time i longingly gazed at my friend after receiving a compliment and smirking while stating: “only a true treasure captures the eyes of __, seems like i’ve struck gold.” homosexual undertones exist!! i don’t understand how this is something controversial or scary to discuss — just because a character isn’t DIRECTLY stated to be queer, doesn’t suddenly mean all the hinting doesn’t mean anything.

heterosexuality isn’t the “default”, why do you have to assume every character is straight? i don’t remember them staring down at the camera lense to specify.

you can’t be so disingenuous and media literacy constipated that you don’t know how to interpret very simple things like yae miko writing a sapphic book where the main two characters resemble her and ei, the fact kaveh and alhaitham’s introductory quest line is titled “pride and prejudice”, the entire story of xiao and venti meeting, and even something as seemingly dumb and simple as ajax being gifted chopsticks by zhongli. repetitive nuances aren’t there for the sake of silly dynamics, they’re there to get past censorship. believe me if they could they would’ve made yae and ei make out by now.

another gentle reminder: wriothesley is based off henry wriothesley, a homosexual man known for having gay relationships who had a close intimacy with william shakespeare. clorinde is based off a historical feminist and bisexual named julie d'aubigny with navia being based off of julie d'aubigny's lover, who was a lesbian. and if you’re going to argue semantics and say that these are either incidental and don’t mean anything — then neither does the argument that nahida was supposed to be based off the hindu moon goddess.

the weird anger that procures whenever gay ships are more popular is so baffling. yaeyato quite literally come along as a reactionary ship to eimiko because…they hated lesbians, straight ghuizhong and zhongli shippers have conjured up this rainbow demon that every zhongchi shipper hates them (despite the fact a large majority of guizhong shippers…are also zhongchi shippers).

similarly, jujutsu kaisen has characters whose relationships and characteristics are imbued with queer coding. the dynamic between gojo and geto, for example, is often highlighted as more than just a rivalry or friendship. their relationship is filled with an intensity that transcends typical "bromance," and the narrative hints at a deep emotional connection that resonates with many queer experiences of longing and betrayal. they’re made to be the exact mirrors of each other, pieces of a puzzle that when put together perfectly balance into a piece of art.

“my six eyes tell me you’re suguru geto. but my soul knows otherwise!”

some of you wouldn’t even have your own mother recognise you in such a manner let alone your best-friend who you haven’t seen in years. don’t remember the last time i purred and groaned my friend’s name while we’re on call and i don’t think i could ever bother staring at them lovingly while propping my cheek up with my hand. geto had this man nearly on his hands and knees in front of a public sidewalk near a non copyrighted kfc because he was afraid of him leaving.

what i find also particularly funny is how these same people will view labelling a character as something that somehow dirties them and then will turn around and ship something like anya and that ugly kid (i’m sorry but i don’t remember his name LMAO) — you don’t care about “pushing sexualities onto a character”, you give a shit because it’s queer.

────────────────────────

here’s some resources i found that managed to vocalise my thoughts rather perfectly:

annoying gays are not the problem

“i’m not one of those gays” - shut up.

a deep dive into the queer coding of genshin impact

is honkai star rail actually queer coded?

homophobia in the honkai star rail community

[pillarsalt]

if this seems like a weird question feel free to ignore it! but.. if youve felt it, how do you deal with the guilt of "waking up" from transition and the narratives around it right now? i know logically in my mind that the current state of gender as a concept is a rehash/rebranding of old regressive standards, i know its not logical to do surgeries on young mentally ill and neurodivergent people who are in distress, i know that something cant be a social construct and biologically innate at the same time, and i know that the idea of "passing" or "transitioning to a woman" is misogynistic as hell, but i still feel bad for voicing or even thinking of any of it as wrong.

the majority of my friends are socially drowning in these concepts, and i cant even find any real lesbian friends, let alone someone who i might wanna date someday. i love them, but almost all of the same sex attracted women in my life hate themselves to some degree for being born women and try to seperate themselves from what they think womanhood is. it makes me feel hopeless as a detransitioned lesbian. any advice is appreciated :/

this got long so here's a cut:

I'm not a detransitioner myself, but I know there are many women on here and detrans lesbians specifically who would understand what you're going through. Anyone who'd like to reach out to anon in the notes is welcome to do so.

I do totally get what you mean about feeling guilty, even though your views are logically reasonable and feminist. Unfortunately that's by design: emotional manipulation and groupthink is how trans activism keeps people entrenched. No debate, anything that isn't immediately and entirely validating is simply evil, it's all black or white to them. There's no room for grey when just a little bit of poking and prodding can make your entire movement collapse in on itself.

I think it's quite common, I've heard it from many women, and myself included, that even after realizing the harms of gender ideology, we tend to examine ourselves and our beliefs over and over again because what if we really are evil fascists like they say we are? But every time, it turns out that no, we just care about women's rights to legal recognition and protection and equal opportunity, and patients' (especially children's) rights to responsible and ethical healthcare. Remember that when you feel you must be wrong because your opinion is currently in the minority. What's right is right, no matter how many or how few people believe it.

The other thing is, I've been watching this issue evolve for years now. I genuinely believe the tide is turning and people are seeing the misogyny inherent to this ideology. Most

In my personal life, most of my friends buy into gender ideology. A couple of them identify as nonbinary, although I'm not as close with them. It is a hard tightrope to walk. Honestly I don't get too emotionally attached, as much as I can help it, because I'm ready to lose them as friends if it comes to that. If they directly asked me my opinions I would share them, and I've always been prepared to. They never ask. I have a feeling most of them know I disagree with their views on gender but don't want to "have to" cancel/ostracize me, so the subject never comes up. Funnily enough, the friends with whom I do talk about my views openly are men. I think women, generally being socialized to care deeply about others' feelings and wellbeing, are more likely to have these feelings of guilt when going against the societally ~nice, kind, polite~ thing to do, so are more likely to stay close to the groupthink mentality of "we're good, they're bad, continue doing what we say is good and you can keep being good too". And when you see what happens socially to women who speak out against genderism, yeah it's terrifying to face that yourself.

All that to say, I get what you're feeling. It's lonely and isolating to think differently from the people around you but not feel safe to express it. Especially so for lesbians and bi women who want to date women but find that dating women now comes with the extra exhausting step of avoiding believers of gender nonsense everywhere you turn. But you are far, FAR from the only one. There are a ton of other women in your situation, they're looking for women like you. Don't give up. It's hard but it's worth it. I don't have experience with it myself, but I know of quite a few women who met on tumblr and ended up in long term irl relationships. There are also quite a few rad-related discord groups, some specifically for lesbians as well. Seriously, tumblr has become a great resource for connecting with other feminists. And even offline, there are far more women around you who think like you but are also too afraid of the backlash to speak out. Keep looking, don't give up.

[artemis-fowl-incident-report]

Here is my contribution for Fowl Fest day 2 (should I make this a full story?)

Diary of André Price, 16 years old, Portland Oregon (aka the Baby from the wrestling match in the Atlantis Complex)

Dear Diary

Okay, brain very loud right now, need to vent.

Kind of a lot happened today. New guy finally arrived, you know the one everyone was convinced must be some juvie reject because he was being transferred in from out of state. Turns out no, his dads in the military, and new guy’s been dealing with long covid. His names Jayden, he’s really cute. I give him an 8, no 9, no… 9.5/10 (still not quite up there with Jacob, but got just a little more rizz than Liam).

Not the point, moving on.

When we were let out to lunch, Em was waiting for me outside class (she never does this, since it’s embarrassing enough to be my sister, let alone people seeing us together, but I digress) said she had to talk to me. Something weird happened this morning when she was getting on the bus (I drove in today, so I missed this). She spotted all these guys in big SUV’s scoping around the woods near the river. They apparently didn’t look like the normal military we get around here, and they had these devices in like a backpack thing and were scanning around the area. She looked really freaked out, because apparently they were scanning the area where I usually go to practice.

Em is the only person who knows about my powers. Thank God it wasn’t Sophie. That 10 year old little weasel would have ratted me out to Mom faster then I could have bribed her. Downside, Em has been treating me like her own personal science experiment ever since (perks of having the local town mathlete/spelling bee/science fair champion around, while you are but a smooth brained gay little lizard) but I guess it’s not all that bad. I know way more about my powers now then I did at the start of the year. I’ve gone from lighting little fires when I look at twigs hard enough to being able to jumpstart my car with electricity.

But maybe that’s not such a good thing.

After school Em and I drove out to investigate. We decided not to get too close, giving ourselves an excuse to be there by picking up Mr Hernández’s dog Chika (still the most adorable Pitbull I’ve ever seen, and a total wimp) and taking her for a walk since he’s still recovering from surgery.

Em was right, a whole swarm of men in black vans with the word A.C.R.O.N.Y.M, stitched onto their uniforms (none of them were even slightly attractive! Total let down). But they were scanning around the old well, exactly where I’ve been practicing for months. That must mean they’re looking for me.

We must have made a noise or something, because one of the men pointed and shouted in our direction. We ran, they ran after us, but they didn’t catch us. I think someone on the team, someone who likes to believe they have sense, must have told them to let us go. After all, we were just kids being curious (shows what they know).

Instead of going home, Em suggested we pick up Dairy Queen and hang out for a few hours. She said it was to throw off suspicion in case these A.C.R.O.N.Y.M guys decided to keep an eye on us. I think she just wanted to get me to pay for Dairy Queen, since I’m not reckless with my money like she is. We got Chika a puppuccino from Starbucks (such a spoiled puppy, but she deserved it after our fright in the woods). While we were there, we saw flyers being put up for a wrestling event that’s coming to town next week. Apparently the Jade princess is gonna be there (you’d think our family’s collective obsession with wrestling would have died down somewhat since that accident when I was a baby. Nope.) so we'll probably all being going.

We were just about to head home when I saw something else weird. Four people parked up outside the general store arguing. There was this tall, bald muscle guy (a 10/10), a tall blonde who looked like tall guys sister (Em informed me she was a 10/10. She was totally having a case of lesbian-itus), this small child in an oversized hoodie (Very loud, could hear them over the entire parking lot), and a dark haired guy in a suit (a 100/10, are you kidding me??? Edward Cullen wishes he looked like this dude!!!). I only took notice of them because I heard the kid in the hoodie shouting something about “magic” and “human babies”. I mean… that’s me! I was a human baby (Shocking I know) and I do have powers (maybe magic???). It felt like too much of a coincidence for both the A.C.R.O.N.Y.M guys, and the hottie bunch (+small child) to all be here on the same day.

All this, and I still have algebra homework to do.

Update.

Hot vampire guy is downstairs with muscle man and blonde lady. They’re asking for me!

[trivial-writing]

Ever since watching voltron, my bf and I have been having our little neurodivergent rants about it. Like, for example, the queer baiting. Shiro was gay. What do you mean? Give us sustenance people. Give us food. Shiro married a blank slate. How about you don’t kill off Adam. Hm? How about you don’t make Shiro marry a blank ass slate. Like, seriously, who was Curtis? Making Shiro gay isn’t representation to me. That’s lying to your audience and virtue signaling. You make Adam such a big deal, but he dies thirty seconds after. That’s terrible representation..

My boyfriend and I both agree that Shieo should’ve been asexual instead. I mean the black lion uses purple. So much so that I call it the purple lion instead. And, as aces ourselves, we think that would be excellent lgbtq+ representation.

I’m not done with my lgbtq+ representation thoguh. We, as the audience, got baited into Klance. I’m pretty sure there were some tweets talking about how they, the creators, knew Klance would be popular. They give us gay-coded scenes, but they aren’t gay enough. That’s the problem. The creators play it too safe. They shouldn’t care about what other people think. Pushing against stupid “criticism” is the first step to being a good writer. (Also, they give us two dead lesbians. Why?)

We also talked about the lions. The lions don’t show how the Paladins fit them. Allura just says, “oh, you fit because pfft.” Awakening Blue was amazing because of the setup. The rest weren’t given the same amount of gravitas Blue had. Pidge literally jumped in the vines, and that’s it. She pilots the Green Lion now. Hunk gets sort of the same gravitas as Lance, but still, it kinda sucks. Why doesn’t Blue go to the other Lions, then go to the other Lions? Why am I the only one who thought of this? Oh wait, my boyfriend made a fanfic about it nvm.

My boyfriend had a fanfic idea that was just a fix-it fic. If he wants to, I’ll post it. I think his ideas were really good. If you want to read some of his ideas, let me know.

My bf really liked the setup for Lotor, and I did too. He liked the fact that Lotor wanted a different way to expand the Galra Empire. He was like Azula and Zuko mixed together. If you look at one of my older posts, you’ll see my little mini rant about Lotor’s redemption arc. I want Lotor to be a Zuko-like. He’s an interesting character who deserves a redemption arc. Btw, my boyfriend wanted the fem!Keith member of Lotor’s group to be Krolia’s(am I spelling her name right?) daughter. We both wanted Lotor’s team to be redeemed too. More me because I actually watched Avatar, and I want an Azula redemption arc badly.

So… I didn’t know where season three ended and season four started. I just watched. The whole switching the Lions was weird. If the Lions choose certain characteristics for their pilots, then how come Lance got the Red Lion? Lance didn’t develop into a Keith-like person. If Red is stubborn and hard to tame (or something like that), how come Red doesn’t show that. You can’t say something and do nothing to affirm what was just said. SHOW Keith having trouble controlling Red, and Red disagreeing with him. SHOW Hunk being reliable. SHOW Pidge’s requirements for Green.

I felt the introduction to Zarkon was weird. I like how Avatar set up Ozai. Avatar showed Zuko being a bad person. Zuko was just the Banished Prince. Then Azula showed up. My boyfriend exclaimed, “This is Azula!? She’s only his daughter?! Wtf, Zhing?” Give us two or three seasons with Zendak, then have Shiro die, then fight Zarkon, then fight Lotor, then fight Zarkon again. This way better. How come no one thought about this? Oh, wait, my bf wrote a fix it fic.

Anyways, that’s enough writing for me. This is a long post. I’m gonna sleep.

[ot3]

I looked over what I could find of your thoughts on asexuality, and I THINK I understand your core argument—it’s hard to say because a lot of the posts I found kind of talked around the ideas, and I can’t exactly search “ace” on an ace attorney fanblog and see success haha

But if I pieced things together correctly, it centers around kind of … using the same narrative as other queer identities to [I couldn’t find a conclusion from your posts, just the premises saying this did the ace identity a disservice as well as grossly undercut the gay/trans narratives they pull from].

I’m not sure there’s room for asexuality in the queer narrative, if that’s the problem. If, because everyone experiences sexual violence and shaming unless they’re a part of a small minority, the oppression/pain narrative doesn’t fit.

Every June, people celebrate pride and the exclusion of ace identities immediately follows, usually because those who are ace haven’t suffered in the ways other queers have. The gate is kept for those who think queerness is defined by oppression first and foremost. The gate will continue to be kept regardless of any argument of suffering, no matter if it’s original or ripped—primarily, I assume, because the argument isn’t that aces haven’t suffered enough, but because people genuinely think they aren’t queer, and they’ve picked the one point ace individuals might have a hard time navigating around (because as you said, all sexual expression or non-expression is punished if it is not part of a small celebrated minority), and if they DO argue that they’ve experienced sexual violence, it’s easy to reject.

I’d like to hear your thoughts, if you can spare them, on whether aces are queer—and what queerness is, in the case that it excludes them.

Because once we get into suffering politics, I feel like we inevitably find ourselves in radfem territory. One queer experience is often going to be drastically different from another. A white lesbian knows not the struggles of a trans black woman, but both of them are queer.

So yes, let’s say the ace community is erroneously using language that is disingenuous to everyone’s experiences. The queer community is demanding pain from them in order to be valid. The pain is not exclusive but nearly universal, but oddly never enough. What changes? Are the aces not queer? Or is queerness as an exclusive pain narrative the core of its identity?

Perhaps I missed something in what I read and you aren’t using pain narratives—the concept of transforming queer narratives for acceptance and therefore discrediting all identities involved read as protective, which raised some flags. What I can see of your argument I don’t even necessarily disagree with.

But if the argument is that everyone suffers sexual violence if they’re not part of the celebrated sexual minority, doesn’t that neuter the whole sexual spectrum? That’s bunching everyone into a massive subgroup of not cishet white male. The aces are saying they experience a different sexual violence from straight cis Carla and gay Jerry. Or, not using a pain lens, the aces are saying they experience a different sexual identity from others. Is that not queerness?

Maybe that’s what you’re asking for. But if we’re excluding sexual violence from the narrative because it’s too general a premise, then that HAS to be excluded from your definition of queer.

i have been so, so, so, so clear, over and over again, that i do not care who wants to use the word queer for themselves. i'm not sure how much clearer i can be on the subject and i don't see a point in trying to explain anything beyond that when no one will even listen to that much. i am not going to have these discussions with tumblr anons anymore, it is a waste of my time. if anyone is really pressed to know my opinions they are free to talk to me by literally any method other than anonymous tumblr asks.

[iwanthermidnightz]

Shattering stereotypes is part of this journey, particularly harmful ones that members of this community are transphobic. "I think that it's been really hard to break those stereotypes and stigmas that society has just placed on so many people that have been unwarranted and unwelcome, she says. So we're getting rid of those, hopefully, as more people learn to love themselves and exist and change the way others see one another."

"I think being a lesbian has been such a journey, and I've always known I was a lesbian since I was 5,” she adds. “So I've really grown a wonderful relationship with that word, knowing that being a lesbian is powerful, being a lesbian is beautiful, being a lesbian looks many ways. And it's been exciting to reclaim that word and what that means to me and what it means to the world, truly."

In recent years, the number of other pop artists who are sending the same empowering message has grown exponentially. It used to be that just a few artists among them, Kiyoko, Janelle Monáe, Kehlani, Halsey, and Tegan and Sara — were singing about sapphic love on pop playlists. Today, dozens of singers and bands like Muna, Fletcher, Zolita, Carlie Hanson, Rina Sawayama, Chloe Moriondo, Rebecca Black, the Aces, Sarah Barrios, King Princess, and Dove Cameron are making music that revels in the joy of being queer and loving women.

“It’s been incredible. I think that it’s long overdue. And I’m so grateful that we are normalizing our queerness in mainstream and in pop music,” Kiyoko says. “Growing up, I never could have imagined I’d have the opportunity to sing about women so boldly and still chase my dreams of being a pop star and to be mainstream. And it’s been an incredible journey and ride. And a win for one is a win for us all in just moving the needle forward in representation.”

Kiyoko sees this joyful tone as a welcome shift from the sadder lesbian songs of yesteryear. “It seems as though there is more space for us to celebrate our wins and our joy and our happiness,” she says. She points out that queer artists have always written about joy; it just wasn’t always accepted by the mainstream. “A lot of times in the media, it’s focused on our trauma and how challenging it is to exist. And so it’s finding the happy balance of validating both of those experiences,” she says. “I think we have a long way to go in Hollywood and television and film. But in the music space, I feel like we are able to listen to songs where we can just celebrate ourselves for who we are and celebrate finding love.”

Now that Kiyoko has helped create this freer music landscape, Lesbian Jesus is planning on expanding her queer kingdom. Fans of Kiyoko’s work in projects like Disney Channel’s Lemonade Mouth or The Fosters should know that she’s not giving up on acting. The former softball player even has one show in particular she’d love to be on.

“I watched A League of Their Own on tour, which was so fun,” she says of the new Amazon Prime Video show inspired by the classic 1992 sports film by Penny Marshall. “And that was really exciting to see queer narratives at the forefront…. I feel like that was something that we don’t really get to see.”

To remedy that, Kiyoko is also focusing on directing. She’s already directed most of her music videos and now wants to expand to feature films and television in order to tell queer narratives. The road isn’t easy. “It’s been really interesting to navigate that space as well and how challenging it is for [queer creators],” she observes. “There’s a reason why we don’t get to see a lot of queer narratives in shows because it’s just so hard to get them made.”

She also recently announced that she has written her first novel, a coming-of-age romance based on her breakthrough song “Girls Like Girls.” The novel of the same name is set to come out May 30, 2023 from Wednesday Books. She also has said that her “biggest dream” would be to adapt the novel into a series or movie. Let’s pray to Lesbian Jesus that that happens.

As an artist, Kiyoko says she always has “4,000 things” going on in her head at a time, and that she’s excited to show as many of them to fans as she can. Even as she’s wrapping up her current tour, she’s planning headlining one where she hopes to get to perform every song from Panorama. Lesbian Jesus has worked hard to build her message of self-love and queer joy, and she’s going to spread this gospel as far as she can.

(LINK)

[americascomic]

My first year of transition, I really refused to engage in any trans literature, whatever theory, non-fiction or fiction. The exception is I read Andrea Long Chu's essay "On Liking Women" within days of coming out and I think I was still so close to just that raw rush of realizing that I am trans that it earnestly hurt to read and I had not nearly enough distance to really look at with a healthy perspective.

The trans community I first landed into at the time was this very urbane, overly white sorta vague Bushwick transbians types who engaged with trans authors as this sorta fixation on trans media - it felt very competitive and made me feel insecure and I couldn't keep up. Detransition, Baby was big at the time and everyone read it, everyone had a hot take on it and I was just getting footing with my queerness. I think this was sorta emboldened by a lotta of the girls around me "always knew they were trans" and were studying up on the issues beforehand it made me feel like I was coming into school mid-semester.

I think it was actually very much high school, and a lot of the girls (we kinda found ourselves and started transitioning at the same time, and at the same age - in our mid-to-late 30s) were insecure and I think wanted to look more confident going into this scary new world then they wanted to let on.

The books were really scary for me. Especially Whipping Girl and Detransition, Baby. I was terrified of my lived experience being talked over and feeling flattened and isolated and alientated.

Additionally, I experienced a lot of transmisogny in my first year of transition from other non-femme queer people and I sorta created this reflex for myself to be ashamed of self-advoacy and maybe even shame for my trans-femminity. And I retreated in something that I think is understandable, which is to focus on the racial aspect of queer liberation and read books on anti-racism and Black history. (I should say I'm white here)

Then, about a year and a half into transition I had family members do something incredibly painful to me. Like, it was such a shock from people that I thought I could trust and I would describe the experience as psychedelic in just how much it opened my eyes. Seeing that level of cruelty was just sobering and it made me come to terms with a lot of stuff in my transition that I was in denial about. It made me (somehow) admit to myself I was a lesbian. And it made me finally wake up and realize that I experience transmisogny, and that there is bigotry that is directed squarely at me and that I'm not somehow this proxy war for other intersecting battles, or that I need to give defrence to those who suffer more than me as some sort of token in order to speak on my own discomfort.

I told a non-binary friend about this, about how I basically "you know, I'm starting to think transmisogny is a thing I experience" and they put their hand on my hand and was basically like "this is why you should be doing the homework."

I don't know if Whipping Girl was right to have read right when I came out. Those self-protection measures were in part there in the reason. And I despise - especially as a trans woman - playing in games of woulda couldas. I just am happy that I am finally doing the homework and the book is opening me up to further revelations. Like taking ownership that i'm femme for femme. And that I'm a high femme and I should be proud of that, and take ownership that I am a high femme for it's own good and not as some consesion to a larger society.

I still have some contempt and nervousness over "trans homework assignments" but I read so much, and books ultimately are about letting another voice in your head and I deserve to have a trans woman in my head.

[max--phillips]

genuine question but if being heterosexual or homosexual has nothing to do with genitals then what are those of us exclusively attracted to one sex or another supposed to do or call ourselves...

I’m going to do my best to respond to this in good faith, but you’ll have to excuse me if I get a little snippy because I am not the only person who has addressed this and trans people are, rightfully, kind of tired of having this conversation. That said, this is probably going to get long.

The short answer is: why do you feel the need to differentiate yourselves? You just keep using whatever label makes you happy.

The long answer has several parts. It has to do with division, medicalization, communication, and, of course, attraction.

First: division. This is a slightly longer version of my short answer. If you identify as a lesbian, and you truly are only interested in having sex with people with vulvas, you’re still a lesbian. There’s no need for you to differentiate yourself from the rest of the community. I’ll expand a little on that with communication.

TERFs reeeeaaaaaaaally want lesbians to be their own little island within the LGBT community, as if we don’t have a long, rich history that overlaps with bi women, trans women, trans men, and nonbinary folks. Bi women face similar discrimination. Trans women have always been a part of our community because they are women. It isn’t unheard of for a trans man to refer to themself as a butch lesbian, or vice versa, and for that to be completely valid (and there is a ton of overlap in our experiences otherwise!) Nonbinary people have always been a part of our community, too. While labels are important to many people, we need them to stay labels and not become boxes. The world is not black and white, and neither is gender and sexuality.

Second: medicalization. I realize that the terms homosexual and transsexual are being actively reclaimed by our community, but I do not know very many folks who choose to label themselves as “homosexual.” (Not that you can’t, of course, it’s a perfectly valid label to choose!) The reason they’re being reclaimed is because they came from the field of psychiatry to pathologize our lived experienced because they were seen as wrong or deviant or abnormal. But, words change meaning over time. In the context of the LGBT community, “homosexual” just means gay or lesbian. It no longer means its biological definition, which is two animals of the same sex engaging in sexual activity. Therefore, someone who uses the label homosexual is typically not implying that they are strictly attracted to someone of the same sex, but rather as someone who is attracted to the same gender.

We need to learn, as a society, that yes, gender is a construct, but so is sex. It is two arbitrary categories for people with “typical” genitalia and other secondary sex characteristics. Yet, many people fall outside of those categories, and may not even realize it their whole life; many DSDs/intersex conditions are wholly undetectable unless specific medical tests are run. Sex is just as complicated a subject as gender, and once again, folks (especially TERFs) want so desperately for everything to be black and white that they ignore this fact when having this conversation.

I’m going to mess with the order here a little bit. Third: attraction. I’m going to say something that is going to make you defensive, but I ask that you hear me out. You are not attracted to a specific sex. Let me explain. Let’s say you see someone on the street. You know absolutely nothing about this person, but you find them sexually attractive. Given the opportunity, you’d gladly have sex with them. But, you still don’t know anything about their chromosome makeup, or their genitalia, or anything other than the outward facing secondary sex characteristics you can see. This may give you an assumption as to their sex, but it does not guarantee anything either way. You don’t know anything about their biological sex until you get into their pants or ask—and even then you STILL might not know.

There are trans women with vulvas. There are trans men with penises. Yet, technically, only the orientation of their genitalia was changed, not what sex they were determined to be by their DNA—be that peri- or intersex. Yes, bottom surgery used to be referred to as a sex change, but the language has evolved to be gender affirmation surgery (which also includes other procedures, such as top surgery and FFS.) Ultimately, at the end of the day, you are not attracted to a specific sex. You are attracted to a specific gender, and you have a genital preference. Which is fine! And leads to my last point.

Finally: communication. Look, I know that there was a pretty strong camp a while back that was like “if you have a genital preference you’re transphobic” and while I will always encourage people to examine why they have a genital preference (is it trauma? Is it genuinely just preference? Or is it internalized transphobia?) I don’t think that having those preferences is inherently transphobic. That said, there is a correct way to go about communicating that preference.

Just be fucking polite. If you’re flirting with someone and think you might get busy, you just tell them, “hey, I think you’re really cool, but I just want to let you know I’m really only comfortable with this specific genital situation. Is that going to pose an issue?” And if they say like, sorry but I don’t have that situation, you say “bummer, but no worries! You’re cool though, I’d still like to hang out/be friends/whatever.” And if they say no issues here, steal me away, then y’all go do whatever you wanna do.

Key takeaways: you put the onus of the genital preference on yourself, not on the other person. No “what’s in your pants,” no “so have you had bottom surgery,” none of that. And you also don’t react negatively when and if they tell you one way or the other. This is not an invitation for you to lash out at them or be violent or anything crazy like that.

Ultimately. Stop trying to force the world into pure black and white categories and realize that everything has overlap and complexities that you cannot and will not root out. Separation only makes us easier to conquer. And they won’t stop conquering with the minority du jour. They will come for you, too.

[mogwai-movie-house]

The White Lotus (Season 2, 2022)

Just finished the second season of Mike White's wondrous black dramedy The White Lotus, a tale of dead bodies and affluent Americans abroad, with each season set in a different branch of the same exclusive holiday resort, this one in Sicily.

One of the things I most like about White's work is his nuanced depiction of women and subtle, closely-observed dynamics between the sexes: it's very noticeable in his film The Good Girl and his previous show Enlightened. One of the older characters in this one sums up White's philosophy on humanity when he tells his young male feminist grandson "Women aren't all saints: they're just like us". Because of this we get interesting, 3-dimensional, multilayered performances from every actress, all of whom are uniformly excellent.

This time round we have a rich, dumb, over-the-hill heiress, oblivious to everything but her own whims, a closeted lesbian hotel manager sexually harassing her staff, greedy local girls trading their bodies for money, and three other young women making bad decisions and avoiding examining why or refusing to take responsibility for them. It's hard to imagine these characters being depicted in such an unflinching but compassionate, humanizing way in almost any other show being made in the 2020's, holding them up to the same standards as the men. And none of the characters - women or men - are particularly admirable, likeable or 'good', but none of them are far enough away from ourselves to be considered 'evil', either.

There are no small parts: every character, all the way down to the one-line, bit part player, is unique and memorable, and their words - or even more often silent reactions - add valuable depth and meaning to the story throughout; most often showing us how these characters' delusions and rudeness are appearing to the less-wealthy people outside of their self-involved bubble. Every character behaves in a consistent, believable manner throughout, so the changes in their behaviour feel real, organic and meaningful, and every plot development leads plausibly to the next. This attention to detail and firm grasp of the story elements really isn't something we get to see even in "Oscar-winning™" filmmaking anymore, let alone TV shows, with the occasional exception of something like Better Call Saul, so a show like this is something to be treasured and celebrated wherever it is found.

★★★★★★★★☆☆

[friendofhayley]

Friendofhayley's Top Books of 2022 Pt. 1 LGBTQIA+ Fiction

This Book Rec is on LGBTQ+ books (realistic fiction edition). It includes 5 books. Let's go!!

"There are so many forms of Asian-parent tough love, where parents say and do mean things only because they want the best for us. Is all of that “tough love” abusive? What distinguishes tough-love parenting from abuse? After all, Mom did say she’s afraid of what other people might say about me. Even though she is mostly afraid that people might think she’s a bad parent, isn’t the fact that she’s worried about me a good thing?"

I'll Be the One by Lyla Lee | F/M both bisexual!!

This book follows Skye, a Korean-American bisexual girl in high school who wants to be the next K-Pop star. Her dancing is incredible but the biggest barrier to everyone else is her body. As someone is half-Korean and considered plus-size in that culture, this book definitely felt like something I've always wanted. It hurt but I definitely understood every character's intentions and I loved every second of it. (Even the painful parts. Do we all have mommy issues??) I will definitely read this again whenever I'm feeling down after hearing another Ajumma comment on my body.

Lies We Tell Ourselves by Robin Talley | Sapphic Relationship

This book follows 2 girls: the daughter of the head Civil Rights leader in town and the daughter of his rival. Sarah is the leader of the small group of black students to start integration at Jefferson High. This story was ambitious and carried itself well which is mainly why it's a top book for me. Intersectionality is so important and this author emphasized race but also heavily included the LGBTQIA+ struggles as well in that lens. However, the author is white, so take it with a grain of salt.

"What if this—this rule that says what I did in the back room that day is a terrible sin—what if that’s just a rule some old white man made up, too?"

Juliet Takes a Breath by Gabby Rivera | Latinx Lesbians

Juliet goes on an internship to peek outside the closet by studying under a white cis feminist. She discovers the communities she belongs to and the drama they have, along with finding herself. I loved the queer joy in this book and the warm acceptance Juliet found everywhere in every pocket of the BIPOC community in all the corners of America. You can tell I love intersectionality.

"My God is Black. It’s queer. It’s a symphony of masculine and feminine. It’s Audre Lorde and Sleater-Kinney. My God and my understanding of God are centered on who I am as a person and what I need to continue my connection to the divine,” Maxine explained. She took a long breath. “It’s everyone’s job to come up with a theodicy. One that has room for every inch of who they are and the person they evolve into.”

The Black Flamingo by Dean Atta | biracial gay man

This book is a metaphor for a biracial gay boy growing up while feeling like an outsider in two different worlds. The story is told in prose, yet it cuts you to the core. I absolutely loved this book and how it told this story. It's hard to even put into words how amazing it was. The characters were real and incredible, especially the drag queens.

"If you’re happy in the closet for the time being, play dress-up until you find the right outfit."

The Essential Dykes to Watch Out For by Alison Bechdel | dykes & co

This book was an absolute delight. It has all the comic strips of this story showing the life of dykes (and their chosen families) from 1983 to 2003. It was literally queer joy seeing these characters grow from post-grad to settling down (or definitely not), finding themselves, and supporting each other.

[sick-sad-world-revolution-now]

Hi. I don't want to be trans, but currently the only thing I feel like makes sense for me to identify as is a TIF. I can't find any advice on getting rid of dysphoria except for transition, and I just wish I could be comfortable being a woman. If you are wanting to answer this, that would be super rad.

Hi ! For the first time since I first joined this website I've been off Tumblr for about 8 months, without even realising it was that long, I only logged back today, so excuse my late answer. My advice to you is immerse yourself in the radfem community here as you will see posts on healing from dysphoria.

There's a lot of us with a history of dysphoria, some stronger than others, that didn't require transitioning. Some of us still have it but managed to make it very low compared to how it was before, this being a combination of growing up (puberty and teenage years are really increasing our negative perception of ourselves, our body being our worst enemy, and our mental health is often at an all-time low) and being in contact with the right messages, the right people. Feminism plays a huge role in that and it's something that's greatly missing in gender activism precisely because these two activism oppose (feminism is critical of gender and its inherent sexism whereas gender/trans activism puts gender on a pedestal while pretending the contrary in words). I used to have chest dysphoria and this is something that I can say I nearly got rid of today.

For me this was about letting myself grow as an adult who's just leaning more masculine. As a teenager I was very uncomfortable with it, just the vision of my chest in the mirror created a sense of alienation from my own body, I now only wear sport bras, it's very common among lesbians anyway. With that I wear shirts that are often black (I love this colour so, it helps) and which don't make my curves visible. I don't have big boobs (thank fuck) but to anyone who does and is in this situation bigger shirts are the way to go. There's really many ways to alleviate that discomfort of seeing your chest not being flat when looking in the mirror. But here's where it gets interesting : I don't have any problem with it now when I'm topless. I've learned to first tolerate them, and then fully accept them, I won't talk in much details about it but basically this change is linked to my attraction to women. Self love is a process and it's important to know that we can heal, that feeling terrible at one point doesn't mean we're doomed to feel this way forever. I see plenty of women talk about their former dysphoria, how they deal with it now if they still have it to a low level, so yes, follow radical feminists blogs and it will definitely help you being more comfortable with the fact that you're a woman.