#and none of the people on this show kill their abusers; their abusers die by their own hands--'you reap what you sow'

[razzle-n-dazzle]

hello, friend!! i saw your adam hcs and i loveddd themmm!! i was hoping to request smth if that’s okay? could we get lucifer with a reader who also struggles with depression like he does (it’s mentioned in episode five if you didn’t know!!) and maybe reader had a practically rough week and gets home from work and just breaks down in tears, and luci find a way to cheer them up? either fem! or gn! reader if that’s chill, tysm for taking your time to consider this even if you don’t get to it!!

— 🪽anon

ᯓ★ "Give Your Corpse Some Smile Lines." Lucifer / Reader | Oneshot TW! Read at your own risk and comfortability! | talks about depression, suicidal topics/actions, overdosing topics/actions, reader breaking down, hurt to comfort, self destruction, abuse

ᯓ There are days and weeks, sometimes months and years, that prolonged like time, made it appear like it no longer moved and served a purpose. Like time was nothing but a feign idea that was made to torture everyone and anyone who dared think about it, who dared to calculate how it traveled and how long it took to pass a minute. And some days it made people want to break, and some day it made people want to kill other people, and some days it made people overjoyed, and some days it made people excited, and some days it made people nervous, and some days. . . It made you want to die.

ᯓ To be killed in the most brutal fashion known to man, to explode in a death either as silent as taking your own life in your own home or as bright and fantastic as the explosion of fire works. Time for you was never a friend and it continued to taunt you after you had died, overdosing on the pain medication you were prescribed after a horrible accident. Horrific! You had heard people call you, friends and family, after they saw the state of your decaying body after being rammed by a truck who lost control. Monstrous! None of them chose to stay around, none chose to help you when you were at your weakest and worst, when you could barely help yourself. And all you had done back then was help them! Was care for them! Be there for them at any time of the day whenever they needed, whenever they wanted, whenever they asked or called or texted or shouted or pleaded or-

ᯓ And it was a coward move, you were sure. Weak, many would call it, blasphemous and you were sure it was why you never got into Heaven despite having done everything in your power to be okay, to be the perfect person everyone wanted, to be good. But one night, when everything was moving too slow and no one seemed to blink twice at your presence, you would take your own life in silence. To overdose on your own pills, both praying it wouldn't work but gain the attention of someone yet also praying it would kill you and finally let you live in peace. In a world of black nights where you didn't have to open your eyes no longer, where time wouldn't be creeping over your shoulder, where nothing would hurt anymore because dammit. . . everything hurt.

ᯓ IT ALL FUCKING HURT.

ᯓ And then you ended in hell, and then you realized this would be your life . . . and then you realized you were still stuck with your worst enemy of all: Time. Forever stuck in an eternity after life, forever stuck here by yourself, forever being another face in the crowd or another person on the street for people to pass by and not think about twice. Someone. Just someone! Not even someone, no one. Just a shell, just a person decaying on the streets, decaying for all to see. A pitiful show.

ᯓ You could hardly remember when you met Lucifer; Maybe you were down on your luck one day and was eating cold Ramen out of the streets and he took pity to sit by you, to talk to you. Maybe it was when you were at a bar, downing another drink to forget the fact that you were chained down here, chained to your enemy, chained to your eternity of a never ending moment of the hands of time. Maybe you were working your minimum wage job to barely survive, or maybe you bumped into him. You memory hadn't always been good, party due to your own mental health and a constant flight or fight response, yet you had always knew life to be so bleak before you had met him. And then one day, everything was slightly a bit more okay. And slowly everything was a little more barrable; Even just slightly.

ᯓ And maybe a life can be handled in eternity, and you didn't have to be alone anymore . . .

ᯓ Yet, no matter how much anyone wished, love cannot fix all problems. Love can teach you how to heal, love can teach you how to live, love can teach you how to handle everything inside of you in a better manner than self destruction. But love cannot instantly fix everything wrong with you; You should have realized that sooner.

ᯓ You lived a life nothing short of a fairy tale for the last few months, living life alongside a partner who you could share the weight of the world with. Who felt comfortable enough to share the weight of the world with you. Where in the days you both laughed and played, pushing and pulling each other, peppering kissing on skin and longing ones on the lips. And at night you cuddled against each other, both with the fear of losing, both with longing, both just enjoying the company you now had, that you could now share. You've already shared tears, concerns, worries, troubles. You've both been vulnerable under the other's eyes, staining shirts under the other's careful and cradling hug, broken down and rushed out apologies. You've already both taken care of each other, took your time and held patience with each other and you both tried to heal the broken pieces of one another. Most would call it a disaster, a tragedy, yet for you both . . . it was like some sort of twisted hope, knowing you were no longer alone in your self deprecation. Knowing that even if either of you tried to self destruct everything around you, tried to gain that control that's slipping away, tried to push the other away, they would understand and be there. That in the end of the day you had someone to crawl to.

ᯓ Yet even with constant oxygen and wood, a fire can still grow dim in it's own silence and try to snuff itself out.

ᯓ This week had been long, it had dragged you by the heels and you could no longer put the energy to fight against it's slowing seconds. Working a minimum wage job, even after Lucifer had told you that you never had to again (yet you continued to do so for some sort of feeling of schedule and stability), that you hated and wished you could quite for a paycheck that wasn't even that high to withstand the abuse you had to. Lucifer constantly worried about you, about how the job affected you both physically and mentally. You often came home either drained or hurt, as costumers tended to get rather violent down in Hell. It was common to be stabbed during a shift and having to endure it until your shift was over. Effectively causing you to bleed out while still having to rep a costumer service smile. And the stabbing might not even be the worst part of everything; As you had to try many times to bite back any sort of emotion, ire and frustration and sorrow, as costumers yelled, screamed, tossed shit your way for a mistake you didn't even make. And yet it was your fault. It was always your fault and you couldn't do anything but stand there and take it, as your job would be on the line if you did anything other than stand there and take the anger and take the frustrations and the yelling and the stabbing; Being everyone's personal punching bag without any sort of composition.

ᯓ What was the point of it?

ᯓ The thought had came to you one day after you came home, slugging your shoes off your feet and tossing your keys onto the counter. Lucifer wasn't home, he usually was, yet you guessed he had something better to do than hear your sorrows of the day. You would want to do anything than hear about your sorrows as well, you couldn't blame him for trying to avoid you. So you dragged yourself to the bathroom, heavily sitting down upon the close lid of the toilet before sinking down some. A hand rested upon your stomach, the knife that pierced through your side slid in between your fingers like it didn't draw your blood out. Like it wasn't causing you pain; not even the worst pain in your life, just pain that poked and pricked and brought tears to the eyes, but you were no stranger to tears or to blood. You were no stranger to the bruises that covered your body from angry costumers, from the blisters that grew from harsher treatment, from the blood that seeped and stained. And maybe you should take care of that wound, but it was best to keep a knife into the wound than take it out; It stopped bleeding and you hadn't stained that much, you didn't think, and you were oh so tired so maybe. . .just a nap would help. It didn't have to be a long one, yet something in the back of your mind hoped it would be, and you leaned your head back against the back of the toilet. The light above gave out a buzz, showing it was working, sounding that it was on and here.

ᯓ Yet a nap sounded nice.

ᯓ "Honey! I'm home!" Lucifer shout, a cheerful laugh followed and a careful grin was stretched on his face as he tried to balance the bags of groceries that were in his arms; Trying to make his one round of bringing groceries in to work. He didn't want to drop a single one of them, "I'm sorry I took so long, yet I went to the store and wow! There were a lot of options for things that I was sure I would never make it out of there! Did you know that there's like. . ." Lucifer would pause to count his fingers, having successfully delivered the bags onto the counter without breaking anything, ". . .15 different brands of milk?! And they had like this Milk called Almond milk, where they apparently milk the almond and I don't know how they do that but-" Lucifer's voice fell flat as soon as he noticed you weren't around, at least, not around as usual. By now you would have sprung from the couch, or yelled at him from the bathroom that you were doing your business, or came from the bedroom to wrap him in a hug. Yet your presence was absent and it didn't allude Lucifer, at least, not many more. "H . . . honey?" He would call out again, this time with a more shaken voice and frowned eyebrows; His smile no longer held the confidence of a man who managed to do one round of bringing groceries in with 13 bags.

ᯓ And yet you didn't respond to his call, how could you when your own breath was so shallow your heart was speeding up, stressing, just to pump blood through your body; And Lucifer grew worried. It would triple upon seeing the mess you had left, a mess that hadn't caught his eye until now. . . Your shoes left lazily by the door, your keys stained with blood. Blood that streaked like a hand across the counter top and traveled inward, towards the bathroom and it's door that lingered tauntingly open. And instantly, Lucifer felt his mouth run dry and his feet speed towards the bathroom with nothing but horrible thoughts piling up in his head. You were hurt and you weren't answering his calls. You were hurt and you weren't doing anything to signal to him that you were okay. Are you okay? Are you dead? Oh god he hoped he didn't get to that bathroom door and see your dead body there, all stained and pale. Please don't be dead, please please please. . . "OH MY GOD!-" Lucifer hated to admit the way his body froze in horror by the doorway, one hand clinging onto the frame and the other shot up to cover his mouth. He hated the way his feet stuck to the ground like they were rooted, forcing him to look at your bleeding and barely breathing figure on the floor.

ᯓ And no, he didn't miss the way your blood was smeared on the toilet. He could never miss such a detail when your blood was the last thing he ever wanted to see seep out of your body and pool and stain everything around you.

ᯓ "Oh fuck! Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck!" The words fell out of his lips, fell onto deaf ears, as he ripped his rooted feet off the ground and rushed over to you, to your body. He felt dazed, confused, unsure of himself all of a sudden. What was he supposed to do? What could he do? "Hey, don't be dead come on!-" He didn't realize he was rambling to himself as he kneeled down next to you, not minding the way your blood seeped and stained his white clothes. He shuffled around, looking for your wound, looking for something he could fix to help you! He was so panicked, and had to stich up your wounds so often, that the thought of calling a doctor didn't cross his mind. Lucifer was hesitant to touch you, but didn't want to hurt you, "Wound, wound wound! Where the fuck is your wound?!" He asked before spotting the knife that was jagging out your side. It was mostly covered by your body, as he had happened to kneel down on the opposite side of where your wound pierced in. "Oh fucking duh, it's where the knife is. Nice job Lucifer can't spot a fucking knife when your lover is bleeding out on the floor!- Shit wait I need to actually take care of that. Fuck! Where the hell is the first aid kit?!"

ᯓ To say Lucifer was freaking out during the whole process of taking out the knife, tossing it to the side to be picked up later, disinfecting your wound, trying to stitch it up with shaking hands, and wrapping you up. . . would be an understatement. He was terrified to hold you, afraid he might make the wound worse or he might put you in more pain, yet somehow managed to move you from the bathroom floor to the couch in the living room. He would have put you to bed, at least provided your body a little more comfort, yet he was afraid to leave your side. Afraid that if he took his eyes off of you that something might happen, that you might roll onto the wound and break the sticking, that you might just stop breathing as a whole and leave him alone.

ᯓ He tried calling Charlie to help, yet physicked himself out right before he was going to press the call button. He needed some sort of help, he couldn't go through this alone, yet he didn't want to put his daughter through this either. All he could really do was find himself sitting in front of the couch, head resting upon the cushion, watching your chest rise and fall with heavy eyes; Just to reassure himself you were still here, that you were still alive and you could wake up. Maybe tomorrow? Hopefully. Maybe he should bring you to a hospital. Either way he was here, waiting, hoping.

ᯓ Fuck . . . He didn't know what he would do if you didn't wake up. But you did! By some grace of god you had happened to wake up in the middle of the night, the day after Lucifer had found you. He hadn't been awake, and you were barely moving due to the pain that jabbed at your side. Though you noticed the weight that indented the couch by the edge, slightly turning your head to see Lucifer's crossed arms and nuzzled head into it; He was sleeping, leaning against the couch while sitting on the floor. Drowsy, tired, you glanced over at the couch, wondering why he was sitting down there instead of up here with you. When did you even get to the couch? And then you noticed how you were wearing some of his clothes, with the shirt pulled up to expose your wrapped chest, the bandages still a stained a little crimson red. And you frowned, eyes heavy, looking down at the wound and realizing, at least to some sort of extent, why he wasn't up here. You had scared him . . . A heavy sigh left your lips as you reached a hand out, shaking, as you leaned down into the cushions. Gently, you placed your hand on top of Lucifer's, trying to intertwin your fingers without waking him. If anything, by the way he looked, you were sure he just managed to fall asleep . . . and most likely passed out from exhaustion rather than willingly succumbing to slumber.

ᯓ Though feeling the sudden warmth on his hands, and being half-awake and half-asleep in general, Lucifer's eyes fluttered open despite being rather heavy. He felt heavy, he felt tired . . . yet his hand felt warm, causing his eyes to glance down and notice your hand on top of his. Your hand, your thumb rubbing against his. "Love?. . ." He would mumble out, hoping this wasn't a dream, as he gently raised his head. You noticed the way his eyes sagged a little, his eyelids clearly heavy with eyebags starting to form under his eyes. The frown that had been on his face, tugged down out of pain, began, sluggishly, to tug into a warm smile. "You're awake. . . how are you feeling, do you need anything?" The way his voice croaked, clearly tired and clearly worn from tired and sobbing. His disheveled look, the way his hair was more frazzled than normal and the way his clothes were stained. It all made you upset; Not at him, no, you could never be upset at Lucifer. You were upset at yourself. For causing him so much pain, for making him probably so worried and panicked with the crawling thoughts of your death if he dared to ever take his eyes off of you.

ᯓ Lucifer, waiting for your answer, would gently bring your hand up to his cheek. He had missed your warmth, you had been so cold when he touched you last to move you from the tile of the bathroom floor to the plush cushions of the couch. He was glad that the warmth had returned to body, that he was able to watch your eyes sparkle in the dim lights that flooded in from the kitchen stove hood.

ᯓ His eyes were so gentle, his smile was so genuine, and all you managed to weakly croak out was a, "I'm sorry." And you felt bad feeling the warm tears starting to clump up in your eyes again and spill over. And you felt horrible as Lucifer shot awake, seeing your tears through the light of the kitchen, and rushed to bring his free hand up to your cheek to wipe away your tears. "I'm so sorry Lucifer I. . ." You would choked out, unsure what else to say. How else could you apologize to Lucifer when you knew that you had laid there, on the toilet, with the intention to hopefully die. And you didn't know how to tell Lucifer that to his face, especially when you've never had to tell anyone who's gotten as close to you as Lucifer has that you've thought about killing yourself. That you tried to plan it out in your shared home. Where you knew they would find you. Where you knew. . . "Hey, hey, it's okay. You're-" Lucifer paused for a second, glancing down at the side of your stomach. He had to reassure himself that you were alright before trying to comfort you, "-okay. You're okay now!" Lucifer grinned towards you, a little nervous at first before it fused out into more worry. "You're awake and you're not dying and it's okay! We can. . . talk about it all later okay? Just focus on getting better."

ᯓ You both would sit there in a comfortable, slightly-comfortable, silence as Lucifer stared up at you, and you stared back down at him. His hand, after having cleared your tears, hand reached up to play with your hair, trying to coax you back to sleep. Even when you knew he needed sleep himself, with the way his heavy eyes closed for long periods of time before opening again to meet mine. "Come here. . ." You would mumble, trying to reach for Lucifer, wanting to feel his warmth against yours. He was hesitant to do so, you could tell by the way his eyebrows scrunched upward and the frown that tugged on his lips. It took a while to coax him onto the couch, where even then he gingerly laid on his side and wrapped his arms cautiously a safe place above your bandages and nuzzled his head between the crook of your neck. You were able to play with his hair this time, give him a soft peck on the forehead. A silent apology for all the pain he had to endure because of you without you there to help, without the support he had shown you countless of times without fail.

ᯓ "I. . ." Lucifer's voice warily mumbled out, ". . .thought I was going to lose you." And the way his voice cracked broke your heart into a million pieces. And the only pathetic response you could muster back to him was a soft, shaken, "I'm sorry." As tears silently began to fall down your cheeks, and you could feel the silent tears that fell from Lucifer's eyes stain your neck. "I'm. . . so, so sorry. . ." "It's okay. . ." Lucifer would hug you a little tighter, "We'll work through it together, you're not going to lose me that easily, even if-" He would pause, choking out a bit of laughter between his tears, "-you try yourself."

ᯓ Oh. . . he knew. . .

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ᯓ★ All posts/fanfictions posted under this blog is owned by @razzle-n-dazzle. Please do not steal, copy, or plagiarize the works! Likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated.

[lazycats-stuff]

hi I love your posts and I wanted to ask if you could do batfamily x newest batbro who was created to be a weapon and when bruce saves him and makes him have a childhood he couldn't make choices like the demon slayer kanao please

Hi! I'm glad you like my posts. I would like to state that I have never watched Demon Slayer, but I went on Demon Slayer wiki to get some info, so if there are some incorrect details, my apologies.

Summary: (Y/N) never had a choice. Bruce decides to change that.

Warnings: pure abuse, (Y/N) is a weapon for his father, Bruce and the boys are giving (Y/N) a new childhood, (Y/N) is slowly getting accustomed to his new life, (Y/N) trying new things...

In life, you often don't have a choice where you end up and who your parents are. You often don't have a choice. (Y/N) didn't have a choice. A life full of violence and overall dear and submission. Even the slightest sound of fear or pain could get you in trouble.

He has been training with the others ever since he could remember. As far as he knew, he was in a program that created weapons. Human weapons to be more precise. The program's enemy?

The Justice League.

He is the only survivor of the program's regime and training. There were kids with him too, but they were just weak. (Y/N) remembered one morning where they were all blue and just cold to the touch. (Y/N) had no reaction to it.

Why would he?

And reaction will get him beaten and maybe drowned as a form of punishment. Well, not a maybe, it's a sure for drowning. (Y/N) often thought to himself that they had a list full of punishments. He wouldn't be surprised.

He rarely got punished, because he has learnt what will happen when he decided to fight back. He shuddered every time he has remembered the punishment he got the first time he tried to fight back.

It's better if he doesn't remember.

That punishment broke him. Whatever he was before that punishment, he wasn't anymore. He became a shell of himself, allowing them to break him in and build him back up again, just like they all wanted.

Who was behind the project, he didn't know. But did it matter anyway? He is going to stay in the program for the rest of his life or rather until he is alive.

There was time when he thought he was going to die. Oddly enough, he didn't hope to die that day. (Y/N) never thought about killing himself.

They broke his spirit and soul and yet again put him back together.

Now that was something that only truly bad people can do. (Y/N) accepted it. He couldn't do anything else, could he? If he escaped they would have tracked him down and he would be dead for sure. (Y/N) accepted his fate, not knowing that the Justice League caught wind of this program and were ready to just take them all down.

On a mission gone wrong (Y/N) was caught by Batman and for the first time ever, (Y/N) became afraid. He didn't show any type fear, but deep down he wanted to hide.

He heard stories about Batman and how he works. Not to mention his kids... Especially Robin. (Y/N) knew who Ra's al Ghul was and how ruthless his assassins are. Robin is no different.

(Y/N) remembers waking up in a cell, a warm blanket over him. He doesn't remember having a blanket back in the program. A sheet would be pure mercy and some sort of heating?

A pure miracle.

(Y/N) remembers sitting up, confused as to why his enemies are treating him better than his own handlers. But that could be a ploy to get him to talk. Instead of torturing, he would get treated nicely.

Not happening.

(Y/N) rubbed his eyes as he stood up, moving closer to the glass panels. Well, they seemed like glass, but they are strong. (Y/N) looked for a way out, but had none.

(Y/N) sighed quietly as he sat back down. Oh this is just great. There is no way out and he is going to get tortured. He closed his eyes as he mentally prepared himself.

He opened them when he heard somebody coming. It was Batman himself, standing in all of his glory.

" I'm not going to talk. " (Y/N) declared and Batman simply took a chair and sat down.

" You don't have to (Y/N). I have all the information that I need my other heroes are going after the person running it. In a few hours the program will be gone and forgotten in history. " Batman declared and (Y/N) was shocked to say the least.

" What? " (Y/N) asked as he couldn't contain his surprise.

" Yes. Soon enough no one will remember the program. After knowing what they do to children, I am more than satisfied. Now there is a question as to what to do with you. " Batman said and (Y/N)'s interest got peaked.

What is that supposed to mean?

" You won't be able to function if you are let in the real life. Now, the other course of action is for you to live with someone. I have decided to take you in. " Batman said and (Y/N) was shocked.

" No. " (Y/N) said quickly. Not happening.

" Yes. You will have to stay here for a few more days until a few things are clarified and set. " Batman said as he stood up. (Y/N) watched him leave.

Oh God.

(Y/N) had to sit back down. He really did. The program will be dead in just a few hours...

Is this what freedom tastes and feels like?

And to stay with Batman, one of the people who made the League, his enemy... (Y/N) shook his head as he laid down. This few minutes are a rollercoaster of emotions and it's just something that (Y/N) didn't feel in a very long time.

(Y/N) is usually a few steps ahead of his targets and there was nothing that could surprise him. But now? He wasn't in control anymore, not that he was anyway, but when he was in the field, he had a certain degree of control.

Now he was stripped from any type of control and any sense of comfort was gone. Having control, a little degree, was comforting enough to (Y/N).

But now, everything was gone. The life he knew was gone.

(Y/N) came to live in the manor a few days later, the boys knowing exactly who he was and what has happened with him. Bruce told them to be nice and tone down everything until he got comfortable. Alfred agreed, knowing that (Y/N) had to be afraid of the change.

Now, Bruce and Alfred had agreed on one thing. And that was something called a choice. Alfred and Bruce gave him his first choice when he was allowed to choose his room. (Y/N) was confused as to how he could choose.

It's just a room, why would it matter? Although, (Y/N) did choose in the end a view with the front of the house. The reason was of strategic reasons, (Y/N) has said and Bruce and Alfred are just fine with that.

It's a step in the right direction.

Jason came by a little bit later, helping him choose some of Jason's old clothing. That was a temporary solution. When (Y/N) slowly got accustomed to the new life, they would go to buy some more clothes.

(Y/N) was slowly slow in picking, but Jason didn't mind. He waited patiently, even offering some of his own advice. Which color is good for his eyes, what would be comfortable to wear around the house... Everything he could think off.

(Y/N) was still suspicious and didn't trust anyone in the house. He didn't like how everyone was pretending to be nice to him. Just be pissed at him and what not. That would make (Y/N) feel better.

Not this.

Dick often asked him if he wanted to learn something about gymnastics, showing him what he could do. (Y/N) was impressed, but has said that those just your average moves in gymnastics. For the record, those weren't any type of average moves. Those were just some of the most awesome moves that (Y/N) has ever seen.

Of course, (Y/N) would never admit it, but still. He can think to himself that is cool. Since that he wasn't really trained in gymnastics, he wanted to do it. It looked like flying and like a test of strength.

Tim was just there helping him with TV shows. Every now and them, he would just take a break from working on cases and working overall and that was broken by watching different TV shows or cartoons, depending on what he finds. That break thing was put there by Bruce and Alfred enforced it.

You don't want to piss Alfred off.

(Y/N) found himself in the living room by accident and was interested by the fact that Tim was watching cartoons. Tim invited him and (Y/N) sat down on the far end of the couch. Tim started the original Snow White from the beginning and and (Y/N) was in love with the cartoons.

Of course he told Tim it was stupid and a waste of time. Tim didn't say anything, instead quietly gathered them on an USB when they were done and when Tim was in his room, simply leaving the USB in (Y/N)'s room subtly.

(Y/N) and Tim never spoke of it again.

Damian has started showing (Y/N) his favorite books, saying that he is the only one who is intelligent in this household. Of course, Alfred is an exemption to that rule. (Y/N) had to unwillingly admit that he didn't read any books when he was growing up.

Damian already knew the answer, but didn't push it or show the signs of knowing. He just got a stack from the library and showed him a couch where he could lay and read. (Y/N) took the books and started reading it.

It has become a nightly thing for both of them, just reading in silence, normally drinking something during it. The two don't really speak about it, they just hang out and that is just about it. It brought them together silently.

Alfred was teaching him how to cook. He started with some simple recipes and slowly moved on to more complex recipes. Alfred saw that he was a fast learner and the two were often found together cooking and just experimenting in the kitchen.

And Bruce?

He helped him with just socializing outside of the house. It has started with just other superheroes and it soon turned into full on sessions to speak. (Y/N) was slowly getting more comfortable and Black Canary was helping him out with therapy. He was against it at first, but has decided to confront his demons.

Slowly but surely, he is getting more and more comfortable and slowly started discovering his personality. Black Canary has even given a green light for (Y/N) to go to school with his peers and Bruce was all for it too. (Y/N) was nervous with the sheer suggestion and they understood.

After a few days of just thinking about it, (Y/N) has decided to go to school. It was a breath of fresh air for him, but slightly overwhelming. His eyes, trained to over analyze everything that could be a possible threat, were analyzing everything and everyone. He met a few people and Bruce was happy to hear it.

Bruce has hoped that one day he would get friends, but hey, one step at the time. Soon, (Y/N) was comfortable with physical affection such as hugs. He liked to receive hugs, especially from Bruce. Although, he is still shy about saying it outright.

Bruce didn't mind, he could see it when he wanted it and just gave him a hug. He always asked him beforehand of course. (Y/N) always had a choice and Bruce would always make sure he knew that. Always.

Soon, (Y/N) became a new vigilante, under a new name, under a new symbol. Bruce was more than proud of his son. Yes, his son. He officially adopted him and waited until his birthday to show him the adoption papers. (Y/N) cried that time in front of everyone. It was from pure happiness of course and he hugged his father, brothers and grandfather by default.

Of course, (Y/N) raised the question of how to call him. Dad? Bruce? Or just plain B?

Bruce said that everything is fine. He didn't expect that he would get called dad. Everyone shared a group hug, showing that (Y/N) he finally has a family that he could rely on. It was an emotional moment for everyone, especially for (Y/N).

After it was said and done, the cheesecake was shared amongst everyone and the celebration went well into the night. Considering that they had no neighbors so there was no complaints on that part. (Y/N) was finally happy in his life.

He finally had choices. People he could rely on. A place he could call home. But more importantly, he is happy. For the first time ever.

[safely-in-vhagars-belly]

''Fight and Die'' Slightly darkAemond x AFAB Reader

Aemond x fem oc/reader

Tags: Show setting, abusive brother (but its not aemond) mentioned of forced marriages and duels, mentions of parental loss.

🔷Summary: Your ancestors once betrayed the Targaryens and paid a high price. Now you are back at court with your brother, who hopes to sell you in exchange for his freedom.

🔷Author's note: It might still be a little darkish but not as dark as usual. I think this is the closest to show aemond I ever got. So he still is not a unicorn yall but he is at least imo he is decent and nice.

🔷Wordcount :3934

You never set foot in King’s Landing before.

Not before the exile of your family almost a century ago.

The Marthryralys were once the most trusted advisors of the Targaryens. 

Until your ancestor, Daeyor Marthyralys sided with the false king, King Maegor. He had been burned after Maegor had died, and your family was banished out of King’s Landing, and the Seven Kingdoms. 

For years you lived across the narrow sea, in a small village in Pentos together with your brother and the heir of your house, Prince Fryand Marthyralys. He has everything you can expect in a trueborn Valyrian prince. Silver hair, bright eyes in a shade almost close to violet and a temper befitting a god, not an exiled prince.

‘’Chin up, sister.’’ He tells you with a smirk as you pass by several nobles and guards, servants and maids alike who all stare at you with judgment. They likely heard stories about your family. Stories of their treason and kinslaying murder and pillaging. ‘’Remember what I told you earlier this morning. Today is the day our family’s legacy will be reborn.’’ That is what he hopes. You hope your brother achieves this alliance. For as long as you can recall he wanted this.

Fyrand sighs before perfecting your hair, putting a loose lock behind your ears. “You be quiet unless I allow it. If you ruin this for me, the consequences could be dire. For both of us, but especially for you.” The glare he gives you says enough. You give an absent nod, staring at your own bitten down fingernails. Fyrand follows your gaze, scoffing with a deep sigh. ‘’And quit that. I didn’t keep you alive all these years so you can fuck this up.’’

The grant doors to the throne room are opened by guards and someone announces to you both as you hesitantly follow your brother. ‘’Lord Fyrand of House Marthyralys, and his sister, Lady Revaera of House Marthyralys.’’ It is one of the few times you hear yourself being called a lady, or even your first name. Fyrand does not bother with kindness and ceremony. He calls you whatever he likes, especially when he is drunk and in a bad mood.

By the throne, several people with silver hair wait. Yet you can easily divide them into two groups. One group wears subtle or not so subtle green accessories. And the other group wears about any other color but green. The Princess's party and the Queen's party. You know this from what Fyrand briefly told you about the Targaryens. The two parties do not like each other very much. Details are vague to you, as Fyrand didn’t want ‘’to corrupt your moral compass with nonsense that is none of your business anyway’’.

You know they are the royal family of Westeros. The Targaryens. Once close friends of your family, now look at you both. You do not know these people and they do not know you. They stare at you with the same confusion and questions you have deep down. You see it mirrored in their eyes and their hearts they carry on their sleeves. You keep your eyes on your soft slippers and faithfully remain close to your brother, afraid of these strange people. They killed your parents. They killed your ancestors. They killed your dragons. ‘’Your grace.’’ Fyrand speaks, full of servitude as he bows down for the silver haired corpse like man that sits the throne.

Or rather the throne sits him. The throne is a monstrosity in the worst way of the word. It does not look like a comfortable chair to you. Perhaps that is what it symbolizes. That ruling is no comfortable chair. It is not easy. It requires sacrifice, usually the worst kind. The kind where lives are lost and doomed.

The smell of poppy is heavy near the king and you assume he uses it regularly to dull his pain. He hangs half defeated, half consumed by the Stranger on his throne, his glare growing every minute that passes when you both are here. You continue ripping your nails subtly. 

‘’We let traitors in now?’’ A man comments, near who you assume can only be the Princess Rhaenyra. She is described as the most fashionable woman in Westeros, with silver, pale locks she often carries in Targaryen fashion. Her gown symbolizes a dragon, with her house colors, red and black. It has nice details and you take them all in. The man itself has shorter hair than his wife, although Fyrand would say it would still be too long for a male. He carries a sword around his hips, and wears a black armor as well. You guess by his age that this can only be Prince Daemon Targaryen, the King’s brother, the Princess’s her uncle as well as her husband. ‘’These two should be hanged outside and for the birds to peck out their eyes.’’

While you feel fear rise Fyrand laughs it off, as a joke.  The king is not so quick to judge you as his brother. He even smiles at you. ‘’You are the spitting image of your ancestor, Grysalda the Bold.’’ Out of both of you, he chose you to compliment.

Your brother boils in his skin next to you, yet fakes a smile and peacefulness.  ‘’Both fierce and stunning.’’ The King finishes. Grysalda was indeed both fierce and bold. She had a total of five husbands and flew the dragon Gravemaker. There was nothing she couldn't do if she didn't set her mind to it. She was said to be a great beauty. Men fought wars to lay eyes on her, Men conquered towns in her name and men would murder everyone that dared to oppose her. She was an interesting woman, although it is disputed whether or not she was a good one.

You make a small curtsy, swayed by the words yet wary of their meaning. Grysalda was a threat to the Targaryens. Is this a compliment or a very twisted warning? But to not acknowledge such a compliment would be rude. ‘’Thank you, your grace-’’ 

‘’Be quiet, sister.’’ Fyrand interrupts almost mumbling so the others won't hear. You close your mouth right away and let him speak instead. ‘’I have come with an offer for House Targaryen and House Velyaron.” He folds his hands on his back. You wonder if his offer is good enough for an alliance. You know what he will offer. You. He will offer you to one of the Princes of either party and he hopes that in return they will allow him to stay in Westeros.

Prior to this offer, no interest was shown by both parties. This changes instantly. Princess Rhaenyra turns into a woman dressed in Velyaron colors. Princess Rhaenys, you assume. Her granddaughters look on as well and even the Greens on the Queens side are surprised.

King Viserys sits up as straight as his sickness allows him. “You are bold.” You hear your brother laugh. You do not join him, your eyes constantly wandering to the interesting people around you. The princes and the princesses, the Queen and the King and their children.

‘’It is in our blood, I’ve been told by my lovely servants.’’ You think back of all the servants that nurtured you and Fryand when you were safely in Pentos and beyond. You are thankful for them, but there was only so much they could do to protect you from Fyrand. ‘’Since you ordered the death of my parents all those years ago.” Fryand smirks hiding the pain very well. The light in his eyes has died a long time ago. Nothing can bring it back.

The only sound that can be heard is Otto Hightower clearing his throat. “Are you here to dig up the past? I seem to recall your parents were planning my death.’’ The king is right. They were. You were almost a baby when the treason was committed but it was committed nonetheless. Your own mother died in childbirth and your father remarried quickly almost the day after.

You have known your brother for a long time. He is a dramatic man. He enjoys having power and enjoys playing with people. He will not tell them right away. He will toy with them first. ‘’I’m here for no such thing.’’ 

The Princess looks at you, as if you know more of this masterplan. You do, but you do not dare to speak again. ‘’I am here to ally my house with House Targaryen.’’ And with that, he hopes to restore your family’s legacy. All those years of planning in exile, all those years on the run all come down to this crucial moment. Was it enough? Or will you both hang before the sun sets?

‘’And why would we ally you?’’ The King asks, which is reasonable. They have dragons. You do not. They have a kingdom. You do not. You only have a freshly gathered army with questionable loyalties as they fight for gold and power.

Fyrand grins. ‘’It’s quite simple. I have built quite the legendary army, across the Narrow sea, in the Stepstones and far far beyond. Men are calling me Aegon reborn.’’ He grins at Prince Aegon, taunting him with this accomplishment. Aegon does not care, judging by his empty eyes and smile. 

You glance at your brother, giving him a clear look that warns him of the path he is rolling down from. He should not forget you two are both hostages until you can prove you are worthy of this alliance. To make him sound like their beloved ancestor is a mistake, you just know so. 

The king agrees with that as well, sitting up straighter and putting his crown back on his head when it slips. ‘’So you have come to threaten us?’’ 

You pull your nails faster, running out of your left hand. Fyrand chuckles but you can hear he has become nervous too. ‘’Your grace, no! Most certainly not. I came to a conclusion. I could destroy you all, but the chance you all yet survive because of your dragons is …too big for my liking. Why not forget about the past, why not let bygones be bygones. We should ally.’’ He says. 

‘’Bygones be bygones.’’ Viserys repeats after your brother. ‘’And how will I know I can trust your word, if you already have began expanding your army?’’ Even more wary grows and dread fills your stomach. You can already see yourself hanging.

Fyrand gives you a small nod and you step forward, your hands neatly folded on one another as you look around the court for any kind face. But everyone looks at you like you are a traitor. It doesn't matter to anyone that you were a baby when the assassination attempts happened. They think you are just as guilty. ‘’I have brought my sister with me. My pure blooded Valyrian sister. She can stay here as a hostage, perhaps even marry one of your sons or grandsons. There is no need to have her wither away.’’ 

The king rubs at his forehead as if a great pain plagues him. ‘’I do not have time for this.’’ He speaks. You and Fyrand both freeze. He is not even considering your offer. ‘’Escort them to the dungeons.’’ He adds. Fyrand is surrounded within mere moments. 

At first he couldn't believe it. ‘’What?’’ He can’t believe his plan didn’t work. And then the rage you know so well returns. He glares at you as if this is somehow your fault. 

You understand you must act fast. So you do. ‘’Y-Your grace! Wait. One moment…’’ You search in the basket one of your servants brought with you. Fyrand glares, at first annoyed that you search your sewing basket. A few men chuckle as well. 

‘’Is she going to knit her way out of this?’’

You put the wool and spools on the ground, searching deeper in the basket until you feel something cold, something hard and something ancient. You lift it from the basket, presenting it to all witnesses in court. In your hands is a familiar dragon egg. The king blinks with his eyes.

‘’Please, do not harm him. He has all I have left.’’ You add with a soft whisper.

‘’We found a chest full of dragon eggs in Pentos.’’ You hope you do not regret this. Fyrand makes a strangled little sound, briefly causing most heads to snap to him, back to the egg in your hands.

Prince Daemon draws his sword. ‘’Likely dead.’’ They might be. Most might be. Some eggs are centuries old, stolen during the time of Maelor.

You are facing certain death and so is your brother. You do not need this now. ‘’We did not have the resources to try to hatch them. We are no Targaryens.’’ You snap at him. ‘’We were lucky if we could find shelter for the night.’’ 

‘’How many eggs do you speak of?’’ The king asks. You did hope he would be interested. He is interested in dragon eggs. What fool wouldn’t be? You glance at your brother. He shakes his head rapidly.

Yet you go through with your plan. You must.

‘’At least seven and twenty.’’

Several gasps can be heard in the room.

Queen Alicent looks at the egg. ‘’’How did they even got there?’’ She wonders out loud.

A shout sends shivers down your spine. It belongs to your brother.

‘’I warn you, Revaera!’’ He thinks he is the only one who can make sacrifices. You will show him. 

You can either lie and be executed or tell the truth and meet your gods with a true soul.

‘’They were stolen from the cradles of Targaryen babies.’’ You reveal, your head hung in shame with the crimes of your ancestors. Queen Alicent instantly turns her head to a young man on her side, wearing an eyepatch. Even from where you stand you can make out the scars that he likely tries to hide. Princess Rhaenyra, although she may hide it, also glances at the young man, her face full of regret and what could have been.

It is true. For centuries your family stole eggs from the Targaryens, replacing well working eggs with eggs that aren’t working eggs at all. Just stone and clay. You walk to the iron throne, presenting the egg to the king. ‘’This egg, I brought for you, my King. It was stolen a few years ago. It was said to belong to Prince Baelon.’’ You know he died shortly after birth but it is clear that the king has never forgotten his first born son.

His eyes light up in ways you never saw before, as you hand the egg over.

‘’This is impossible. The egg is still here. It is in my room.’’ The Queen lets out a soft but painful sigh as if she tried for years to close a door that is now pushed open wildly. You speak. ‘’No, your grace. They were switched. You have likely fake ones.’’ 

‘’After everything I did for you! You dare betray our family?!’’ Fyrand shouts and this time they need to restrain him from attacking you. You back away, terrified of your brother.

‘’They deserve to know! We were robbing babies.’’ You feel like you are betraying your family. But this might be your only chance at survival. You feel tired, alone, terrified and like this can all end in a moment. You have nothing left to do but break into tears.

‘’They are the reason we grew up without parents, without titles, without dragons!’’

You know he is right. And you wish you could do both but you clearly can not. 

From the crowds, a brown haired young man steps forward, carrying the Velyaron colors. The colors of the sea. ‘’Grandsire, may I speak?’’ That must be Jacaerys Velyaron, the Princess’s ‘trueborn’ son with her lover, Harwin Strong.

The king smiles kindly at his grandson, proud that Jacaerys makes the effort.

‘’You already do so, Jacaerys.’’ He subtly looks at his other two sons, who stand by with rage written in their eyes, both green of envy and red of hatred.

Prince Jacaerys looks at your basket, your gown and the silver diadem in your hairs.

‘’We should ally with them.’’ He says. Hope fills your chest as you carefully start to smile.

Although the King loves his grandchildren very much, he will not let them affect his rule.

‘’Interesting. Explain.’’ He says instead, using this as a lesson. Again you notice his other two sons hide their displeasedness but it's so obvious to you.

The heir of the throne continues.

‘’House Targaryen needs more dragons. We can’t risk it that House Marthryralys will search for other allies. Dragons made us kings. Dragons made us strong. We cannot risk for the dragons falling into other hands.’’ You highly doubt that anyone aside a Targaryen could fly with dragons but with the blood thinning over several bloodlines it has become a risk to them.

‘’That is true.’’ The king admits despite the fact that he does not like you or your brother. He can see reason. That is rare for a king. Especially for a Targaryen king if what you heard from your brother is correct.

Prince Jacaerys becomes bashful, blushing a bit when trying to avoid staring too long at you. ‘’And, I think Lady Revaera has proven herself more than loyal to us, providing this information and the dragon egg. In fact, I was hoping you’d let us marry.’’ Marry? You feel new dread fill your chest as the King considers this offer. Even Fyrand has become awfully quiet. You need to turn your head to see if they didn’t knock him out. But no. He is still awake and awfully quiet.

‘’Not so fast.’’ A voice booms, as a shadow brushes past you, making his way to the Iron throne. The one eyed man stands in front of you. You feel threatened right away and gulp. The way he is dressed in all black is intimidating to you. ‘’I have done my fair bit of research into your family, my Lady.’’ You hear your heart beat only louder.

‘’You have?’’ You manage to ask, forcing your hands to stop trembling.

There is a silence in the throne room as everyone listens to what he has to say.

‘’Quite. You have an interesting story. I like interesting stories.’’ What is so interesting, you wouldn’t know. Your story is a tragedy. Perhaps he likes that. Perhaps his own story is a tragedy as well.

He turns to his father, and you briefly admire his long luscious looking silver pure locks that Jace clearly lacks. ‘’There is an old tradition, Grandsire. If an outsider wants to wed a member of the Marthryralys, he must duel a family member of the Lady to prove his worth.’’ That is true, in theory. But Your only family member is Fyrand. They won’t let their heir fight Fyrand.

And so, the king also speaks.

‘’I will not have Jacaerys fight that deranged man.’’ 

Aemond folds his hands on his back, his grin growing ever bigger. ‘’There is also another rule. If the Lady has multiple suitors, her suitors shall also fight for her and prove their worth. The victor shall become her Lord Husband.’’ You become uncomfortable, as you find it a bit of a silly rule, as well as concerning that he knows a awful lot about your family. 

‘’Why is that needed? I want to marry her.’’ Jace bluntly says, laughing a bit to prove how silly he finds these traditions that your house honored for centuries.

Aemond looks at Jacaerys so he can see his face before he reveals what he was planning all along. ‘’Because I am also quite interested in her, Prince Jacaerys.’’ That sends shivers down your spine.

The King is confused. As are you.

‘’You are?’’ 

Instead of addressing his father and his king, he turns to you to give you a kind, almost the ghost of a smile as if he can hear you think and read your confusion that is written across your face. ‘’Hm. A lady as beautiful as you, I’d fight or die for you anyday.’’ Despite these words he almost seems confident he will win this match. 

–

You visit Fyrand later in the dungeons.

‘’So.’’ He speaks as you have removed your hood. ‘’The Princes both seemed quite taken with you. Job well done.’’ He says, sitting up straighter, talking to you in high Valyrian so the guards won’t hear.

‘’They are eager for wives. It’s their age, I think.’’ Boys and men of that age become that way.

Fyrand chuckles as if you said something funny. He knows more about this than you ever will. ‘’Their age has nothing to do with it. They saw the way you played that fossil with that silly little egg of yours. They know their house is a dying one. The dragons become smaller and smaller still.’’ You heard the same, from your spies.

‘’You were clever, to think of it. To tell them the truth about the eggs.’’ You praise your brother, although you were scared in the moments where you acted out his plan. You had to turn off your emotions and believe that Fyrand would face certain death. 

He bows his head in fake humbleness that does not become him in the slightest.

‘’Certainly. I have my moments. I nearly saw Prince Aemond drool when you presented that egg to that corpse.’’ You bet he did.

You become uneasy as you think of the one-eyed prince.

‘’He scares me.’’ You hope it is enough to call off the wedding part of the alliance.

But instead of that your brother’s smile only grows.

‘’Hm. He should. He is much to be scared of, little sister.’’

He leans in closer, his face close to the bars. ‘’There are rumors he tried to kill his own nephew. He is quick to anger, slow to forgive and has the biggest deadliest dragon in the entire world.’’ You hope he is lying. He has to be. He is describing a true monster.

‘’Aemond will win this duel.’’ He adds, as if it's clear.

‘’How are you certain?’’ Perhaps because Aemond is taller or older or something else you do not see?

He laughs as if you again ask a silly question.

‘’Because I saw both him and Jace fight. It won’t be to death, but just so you know: You will become Aemond’s bride.’’

A terrifying prospect. You did not agree to that.

‘’I thought we would pull the plan before that would happen?’’ You ask, your voice scared.

‘’No, little sister no. This is a long time plan. You just focus on keeping and making Aemond a very happy husband, yes?’’ You feel your air cut off at his horrible description. You see Aemond’s hands on your body and his lips near your neck, slightly brushing it when whispering dirty things in your ear. 

Despite that, your body betrays you lie. ‘’Fyr, I’m scared. I do not wish to-’’ You wet your lips, speechless.

Your brother dryly gestures with the stomp that once had a hand attached to it.

‘’We all must make our sacrifices.’’ He says. You feel guilty. He lost his hand trying to get you to safety. He lost it defending the eggs.  He smiles as you silently cry, accepting your fate. ‘’Now go. I bet they are itching to spill each other’s blood.’’

As always with a new story let me know what you thought of it. Comments reblogs likes are welcome but not required. But they do make me smile:)

[deathmetalunicorn1]

Can I ask for human teen! warrior reader who’s title is “scariest woman in the country/world”

She basically kills people who commit horrible crimes ex: abusers, people who killed for malicious reasons, etc. Like a Vigilante

They’re expecting a horrifying older woman but surprised to see a pissed off young teenager who goes the extra mile for justice.

-Tales told of a woman who was regarded as the Scariest in the World, one who carried out great acts of violence, but like others, the violence was never against the innocents, it was against those who would do them harm.

-Nobody knew the identity of this mystery woman, only that to many she was a hero, a vigilante, carrying out justice, while to her enemies, she was seen as not only a threat, but as a dark omen, as there would be no survivors, she wouldn’t leave any, showing no mercy, just as they had shown no mercy.

-Many believe she fell in her last raid, killing a whole organization, burning their headquarters down with her in it, to make sure she took every one of the bastards with her, because after that, she wouldn’t come to the aid, but due to her willingness to fight, others rose up, fighting back against their oppressors.

-Only very few in Valhalla knew of the identity of this mystery woman, and it wasn’t one they had been expecting, as the Valkyries all knew, as they had seen what she had been doing.

-You were only a teenager, a child in their eyes, fighting battles none should have to fight, and to see you so ruthless despite being so young, it was rather terrifying.

-You lived in peace in Valhalla, having no reason to fight, and so you lived happily, growing a large garden, playing with children, and just living life how you wanted to live when you were on earth.

-When you heard of the god’s decision to wipe out humanity, you felt an itch you hadn’t felt in a while and you immediately sought out the Valkyries, and told Brunnhilde that you were fighting, not giving her a chance to argue otherwise.

-You went first, as the gods picked a lower end god, just to test the waters of humanity, and you were going to show them that humanity wasn’t to be fucked with.

-As Heimdall spoke, the arena was alight with both curiosity and fear, as your legend was well known, “She is known as the Scariest Woman in the World- who made those who would do others harm tremble in fear- leaving no survivors- showing no mercy!! It’s Y/N!!”

-Jaws dropped and eyes shot out of everyone’s head as you walked out, seeing a teenager of all people, a hand on your hip and a scowl on your lips.

-Instantly the mood shifted, seeing that this wasn’t an older, vengeful woman, this was a teenager- one who was willing to fight for humanity, to fight for others, and it was terrifying how brutal you were.

-Zeus halted the fight, demanding to know why Brunnhilde was sending a child to fight, but you were the one to answer, “Adults didn’t fight when thousands were being tortured and slaughtered. You gods didn’t help when we begged for your help. I’m willing to fight- why couldn’t all of you?”

-Your words were brutally harsh, calling them out, and many were quick to anger, but they couldn’t bite back, as it was true, the gods hadn’t responded to humanity in who knows how many years.

-You puffed up your chest, continuing, “I fight because I know I can fight- I fight back against those who would do me harm, who would do others harm! And I will continue to fight as long as there is a threat, even ones that are easy to avoid!”

-You drew your weapon of choice, a pair of daggers, preparing to fight, showing your determination, your fire and your opponent, who was cocky, felt a unwavering sense of fear, he knew if he fought you, he would die, even if he was a god.

-Being called out like this by a child was pretty jarring and many gods were quick to side with you, agreeing with your words and way of thinking and soon many were requesting another vote, as they all realized they needed to be the gods they claim to be to humanity, their creations.

-You were a little bummed the fight was called off, as you had been feeling rather antsy, but you couldn’t help but smirk, seeing the gods getting their heads out of their asses.

-Your fellow human warriors were impressed, you won the tournament for humanity, and you didn’t even fight! They were quick to congratulate you, thanking you for your hard work.

-You then pouted lightly, looking a bit more your age, “I still wanted to fight though.” Lu Bu was quick to step forward, giving you a grin that would have normally scared others, but you weren’t bothered, offering to spar with you.

-The gods were also impressed with you, seeing your maturity and your willingness to fight for others. If the world had more people like you- it would be a way better place. It seemed they had their work cut out for them.

[ivys-garden]

I, like many of yall, have noticed a vocal minority of people showing there support for Wilbursoot, going as far as to attack shubble and her supporters. In this post I'll go through the main points I've seen them argue with and explain why I believe that they are all wrong.

“Shubble was the real abuser” - No. If she was, William would have spoken up. There is no evidence for this, well, that isn't faked or saying one thing is another (like the guy saying a pic of will crying was because of shubble or the guy trying to pass a stream of a completely different girl of as shubble abusing will… live. On stream. Yah, think we would have heard of that before now.)

“She has no proof” - genuinely fuck of. In domestic abuse cases there won't always be hard proof, that's one of the reasons the police struggle to do anything about it. If a wife is struck by a husband and it leaves no mark that doesn't mean it didn't happen “why didn't she show the bruises” have you guys ever been bruised? Bruises heal quickly, and she doesn't have any to show since the allegations came out after their break up, all the bruises would have healed. “Why didn't she take photos at the time?” Look at it this way, if I punch you across the face you will have a lot of thoughts, none of them will be “I should take a photo of this so people belive me what I say it happened”

(Also don't pretend that people wouldn't just say the evidence was fake if she did have pictures)

Oh and she does have evidence, the fact William admitted to it.

“She just did it for attention” - bitch, shubble doesn't need attention she was doing great. Just because you never heard of her didn't mean she was some underground indie youtuber, she didn't need to lie to get attention. Also lying about domestic abuse is not a good way to do this since it's really easy to disprove. The other party would come out instantly to tell everyone the truth. William didn't do that because shubble WAS telling the truth.

“Her story changed” - no. It didn't. Even the idea that she changed whether or not wilbur bruised with the bites or made her bled (both of which are still bad, btw) is made up, she never said that, as was clarified by shubble herself

“She encouraged death threats” - She openly decouraged death threats. Saying she was like: “everyone go and tell people to kill themselves” is literally putting words in her mouth

Also, this by no means goes for everyone, but arguing about death threats while, wilbur hasn't told his supports not to send death threats and that wilburs supporters have been saiding threats to shubble and her fans while condemning the few shubble fans who sent death threats, is kinda stupid

(Also this is by no means the main point but I have seen people who support wilbur literally begging for death threats, soooooooo)

(Oh aslo I was mistaken in the early version where I said shubble had implied that she didn't belive wilbur could change, that was another misconception and I'm sorry for spreading it. Shubble does belive that people can change IF they put in the work to do so)

Also remember, William has not been shown to actually change yet. He still hasn't even given shubble an apology that takes proper accountability, when he does that, apologies to everyone else he's wronged, and puts in the effort to actually be better moving forward, then we can forgive him. But at the moment he has not shown that.

So until then: support shubble. Belive victims. Raise awareness for these issues in the gaming space (this has been going on for a long time). And don't engage with people who make up evidence to support there parasocial relationships, don't send death threats (obviously, because that's wrong) but also don't engage in any other way. This will be my last post on this subject. Move on from William and the support for him will die down when they realise there's no one to disagree with, and then William, Shubble and all of us can move past this and into the future as a (hopefully) better space

[the-derpy-duck]

Ok here’s my long ass post about Earthspark Starscream.

None of this is even getting into the final episode of season one because I can’t right now. This show really did body horror and I love it so much.

I love him so so much. I love that the show doesn’t make an excuse for the way Megatron treated him and I like that he was nice. He does bad things and is selfish but also he’s not at the same time? Like horrible friend no doubt but when he was trying to escape he helped his seekers. He lead a jailbreak and he cares at least a bit about the other seekers.

He puts himself first always but also Skywarp was angry at him for not helping. Which would almost imply that at some point he used to help. He shoved her out of his way but he also pushes her out of the way do the energon monster. Was it intentional? Idk. But he did do it. And later in the episode he proves that he can be selfless. He responds well to people showing him kindness. He’s willing to work with the Maltos and follows there plans. He doesn’t even attack them at the end.

Also the fact that no one is like “yeah but you did shitty things so you deserved to be abused” is nice. ‘We’ll obviously no one would say it like that’ have you ever read a transformers YT video comment section? People like finding a way to justify the abuse others go through if they are attempting to fight back and this show says ‘no we aren’t gonna do that. Megaton was wrong to treat his subordinates the way he did.’ Starscream is a bad person, but honestly Megatron is too. His advice to bumblebee on teaching was to use fear because that’s what he did. Optimus tells him ‘don’t use unnecessary force with Starscream’ and guess what he does! I mean you could argue that he technically wasn’t using excessive force but the fact that OP felt the need to tell him not to do that shows something. Like I love this Megatron so much but he still was the leader of a glorified terrorist group. He had good intentions, but it still ended with him leading a group of terrorists.

And the bit where Megatron says he’ll take Starscream somewhere that’s safe and Starscream says ‘no where is safe with you’ is the most thing ever. I love that bit so much. Even if he’s wrong he’s still right because how could he ever feel safe near Megatron or if he knew where he was? The fact that he also automatically assumes the worst in others and is so surprised when Hashtag believed him is so sad to me. Like he’s awful and terrible but he’s also a person who has been hurt by someone who is, from his point of view, helping lock up himself and his subordinates. Starscream is a selfish traitor but Megatron has also betrayed him, his cause (typically, not that applicable to this Megatron), and his people. Also Starscream is telling Megaton to fuck off which I love.

He has the ability to emphasize with Hashtag and he doesn’t want the others to die but he’s spent so much time in an environment that fosters betrayal and constant lying that he can’t just go back for them even if he wanted to. I don’t think he cares either way, but Starscream’s backstabbing nature probably only got as bad as it did BECAUSE he was forced into situations where he could either throw someone else under the bus or be run over. He doesn’t respond as warmly to Skywarp or Novastrom when they showed up (compared to Hashtag) but he had a response. He’s almost apathetic to them but he relaxes slightly and has an almost positive reaction.

Hashtag telling Starscream that bad things happen and it isn’t always their fault was just— AHGHH! I love this episode so much. It’s looking you in the face and saying “hey. that thing you do, where you say this person deserved the abuse they got? Yeah that’s messed up and wrong.” Because people DONT deserve to be abused and no one ever does. ‘Starscream tried to kill Megatron multiple times’ then just imprison, exile, or kill him. And I know that it’s not that simple but if you try to simplify Starscream’s actions then I’m gonna simply Megatron’s possible responses. They both did bad things, we don’t see them doing the bad things in this episode so making an actual judgement is kind of hard but the episode is strongly implying that Megatron abused SS or otherwise unfairly hurt him. I mean SS kind of says it.

Starscream manages to be a really nuanced and complex character without taking away from the others around him. Like Hashtag telling Megatron to leave Starscream alone and Megatron almost shooting Starscream gives all of them more character. Megatron isn’t really WRONG for attacking SS IN THE CAVE. Because if I was Megatron I would assume he would attack the terrains. Hashtag is also a character I didn’t think I’d like as much as I do (her fake evil bit was fun). She cares so much about the people around her and is able to feel empathy for people she shouldn’t and that probably sucks a lot. It’s not a good feeling to feel bad for people and Hashtag is empathetic.

I hope he (SS) will show up more in season two as a neutral force almost like TFP. Because I don’t see him going after the terrains just because they sided with Megatron but he’s also not gonna just join the Maltos. Also Thundercracker pls pls pls. Even if he’s just like ‘fuck this noise’ and then leaves and never shows up again. Just put the Blue guy in.

Twitch trying to recruit more decepticons to Megatron is funny I love her so much.

[messrsbyler]

here comes a rant about billy so if that's not your cup of tea keep scrolling...

it's crazy to me that a piece of shit like billy hargrove is more liked than jonathan.

if you are one of billy's fans, i don't mean this in a sarcastic or jokingly way, you seriously disgust me. people be out there saying they love max but they also love billy. they love lucas but they also love billy. get. a. fucking. grip.

i'm all about letting people enjoy what they enjoy, but when you idolize a fictional character that's an abuser and a racist, that's just not it. and it's not about "oh i like morally gray characters", because billy's fans don't even acknowledge he is a bad person.

all it took was a five minute scene showing his tragic past and you were okay with everything he did? you know who also had a sucky past? el. and still, she remains a good person. also jonathan byers, with his abusive father and emotionally dependent mother, growing up as his little brother's father figure. both these characters decided to break the cycle of abuse.

having a traumatic past doesn't make you entitled to being an abuser. being a white dude in the 80's doesn't make it okay to being racist. i mean, billy literally threatened max with killing three of her new friends by running them over. he was about to fight and commit a hate crime on a black kid. it was hinted that he physically abused max by the way he grabbed her in the car and how scared max looked. max hated him so much she wished he would die. and yet some people in this fandom love him and have him as their favorite character? tell me you didn't understand shit about the show's theme without telling me you didn't understand shit about the show's theme.

all billy has going for himself is his basic white boy looks and y'all are quick to forgive him and pretend he had his redemption in s3 lmao. him giving his life wasn't a fucking redemption. it doesn't work like that. billy fans really turn a blind eye to everything he did but then go against characters like jonathan for taking those pictures in season one, even when he apologised for it and then showed us he regretted it through actions.

so, yeah. to any billy fans, you really disgust me. i'm sure you don't care about my opinion and that none of this will make it through your thick delusional skull, but if you are the type of people to excuse racism and abuse in fiction, you are only a step away of doing the same in real life.

anyhow. billy sucks.

needless to say, if you like billy in any amount unfollow me right now. i have no interest in having any type of interaction with you.

[goodluckclove]

Tell me about your suffering is art stance. I wish to know. Please and thank you. <3

Man you know I never thought I would openly talk about this part of my life because it was a nosedive that took me literal YEARS to recover from. But I'm seeing a close friend of mine go down the same path despite watching me almost sink into the void, so apparently this isn't universal information.

Storytime, dear ones. And it starts here. TW for mania, derealization, substance abuse, kind of parental abuse, and ultimately suicide related stuff.

This is an issue of Content magazine from 2016. It's a popular arts magazine from the Bay Area of California. Flip through it, it's neat! The arts scene in San Jose and around that area is small, but very dedicated.

Now go to page 56-57. The headline for the interview is "Miranda and the Young Outlaws". I did not choose the headline. I did not decide to have my photo be the only one in color. I was, at one point, Miranda, and at the time of that photo I am 19 years old.

I've been a novelist since 12, but at 16 I got into playwriting. It was instant validation. People thought I was good at it, and I was - though good in a way I don't believe applies anymore. Google my full dead name and you'll see some short plays of mine. Some short stories. I don't really mind putting my full dead name out there, mostly because I worked hard for all of that and would rather not let it die forever. So have at it.

If you read this interview you'd probably be impressed. Maybe envious at the depiction of independent creativity being validated at such a young age. A few notes from my present self:

- when Miranda referenced the rehearsal on the street outside the coffee shop, she neglected to include how once her actors finished the final scene, she laid down on the dirty sidewalk with no warning and began to weep from exhaustion. The cast, her friends from high school, most of them still IN highschool, gathered around her and struggled to calm her down.

- when she describes her "house of recovery" she doesn't mention that her "recovering addict" parents got her hooked on medical cannabis to stop her nightly, hyperventilating panic attacks. Not everyone who smokes weed is addicted. Miranda was for three years.

- "when you're young and you find an art form you're really passionate about it helps you emotionally..." The reporter misquoted Miranda here. It HURTS you. That's what she said. It. Hurts. You.

- I considered the other people in that group photo the most important people in my life. None of them talk to me anymore. I get it, though.

The Young Outlaws was my legacy at the time. We did The Muses, and it was one of the most profound experiences of my life. Then after that I had a complete, screaming mental breakdown the night before our Halloween show.

I was working five jobs at the time. I dropped out of school to focus on theater. I didn't eat much, and every other weekend I wrote a new full-length script in the span of less than two days. I was insane and miserable constantly, but that's what an artist is, isn't it? Someone who suffers? Isn't that what it means to put in effort?

It's crazy, but that brainwashing runs so strong that as I write this it's hard not to think that I was somehow STRONGER back then.

I didn't stop so my body stopped for me. I shut everything down over a video on the Facebook group for my troupe that I filmed while lying on the couch, and then I just kept lying on the couch for days. Then weeks. I have a memory of lying on the patio at dusk, looking up at the clouds pass and wishing desperately that I had enough energy to kill myself.

I didn't write. I didn't write for a long time.

But that's what an artist is...right?

It got better when I stopped smoking weed. As I kept going to therapy and adjusted my medication. Then my foundation broke again and I walked out of the show in Santa Cruz I was emceeing for and made an attempt that landed me in the psych ward for a week.

I did write a play there in the notebook they gave us. A friend I made in the unit gave me the title. If I ever make a Patreon or something I'll put it up there because it's good but it's too painful to ever hear aloud.

Listen. Please listen. Lean in close like we're children sharing a secret.

Suffering isn't cool. It is not helpful. It. Will. Not. Help. You. Not in relationships, not in life, especially not in art. Do not make an identity out of pain that you can get ease or erase entirely. If you are an artist with ANY sort of neurodivergence, you do not have the luxury to be the picture of the Tortured Artist.

Mania shows through artistic pursuit. Same with depression. Same with anger and delusion. But people expect artists to be weird and a little unstable and edgy, so what's the problem?

The problem is I'm dying. The problem is that I could've died. The problem is that so many other artists have.

Writing can still be hard. You can write something that's painful. But if your writing is always hard, always painful, always lonely and doubtful and you never walk away feeling proud of yourself - something is wrong. You need to reframe the way you think about yourself in relationship to your art. This is not an option. The alternatives are that you either don't make art, or you make a few works that some people might find so amazing that they talk about how much of a shame it was that you died early.

A few brave people have shared their writing with me and I've been thrilled and impressed. I'm seeing things that should be on bookshelves. I'm looking up short story journals and practically begging them to submit. To them, to you, to me, and to Miranda, I say this:

Your craft is your heart. It can feel, but it doesn't have to break to be worthy. People don't study the tragic greats because they were drunk and high and mean, they study them because they had a beautiful heart and it is an immense loss that it was shattered so soon. Please don't become another tragedy. Please find a way to listen to your craft and your body with sympathy and tenderness.

Please? For me?

[ankhbian]

Theory: Anthy and the personification of Dios are the same person (transgender allegory)

I'll start off saying that this is only a theory and that none of these things mean it's canon. I personally love the headcanon of transfemenine Anthy himemiya but y'all are free to have your own opinions! ^^

WARNING: Mentions of abuse (physical, sexual and psychological) as well as mentions and criticism of internalized and structural transphobia, misogyny and transmisogyny. TMA people i strongly encourage you to tell me if I said something wrong or odd.

Points i think would have another explanation from this theory:

•the scene of her in her childhood with the prince is actually her with Dios and not with Akio, it's her watching her former self, made by people's expectations about her gender, die in her arms

•before getting impaled in the swords of hatred, Prince Dios last words were Anthy's name, which makes it actually more powerful. It's the name she choose herself, it's her saying her name outloud while the personification of the people's expectations dies.

•"Dios is no longer here" line, knowing damn well Dios is a personification of princehood, hits different within this theory. Dios is no longer there because Anthy has rejected princehood, Because she never was a prince, people forced a part of herself to be one. Once she confronted the people with her real self, they're furious, they blame Anthy of killing Dios when he wasn't even real, he was a mere illusion. The only real person there was Anthy, but in disbelief people decided to hit Anthy with all of their hatred.

•Dios after Anthy grows up exists only as a concept, a ghost that appears to push utena to do the impossible, and that feels oddly similar to Anthy. An idealized "man" that never existed ("princes aren't real") who actively tries to help girls (a thing that you shouldn't do, since "all women are like the rose bride, in some way or another" aka all of them are doomed to suffer). Meaning that Dios was the first one to stand up and go against these established structure, inspiring Utena to change the world

•This actually gives Utena a whole other twist: the reason she thought Akio was her prince was because she met Anthy when she was still Dios. The prince, as former Anthy self, showed Utena Anthy's true self, which was shut down by hatred and gender normatives.

•Dios saying that Anthy killed a prince could be interpreted as Anthy still struggling with self acceptance. She's still blaming herself for her identity, seeing it as some sort of betrayal towards society. This means that the person who saved Utena, the person who made the first contact when she was a child and showed her how much Anthy was suffering was no other than Anthy herself. Or, well, Dios, her former self.

•Anthy then is pushed towards conformity within the femenine rose bride role. She knows the most small mistake she makes will put her life in the line. That's why she accepted every order and still got a lot of backlash from everyone. She's seen as the lowest and some sort of witch people are allowed to abuse because she had the prince role in her hands and actively rejected it. For everyone, whether it's Akio or the rose crest, it doesn't matter if her identity didn't fit within princehood, she should have been the prince, but since she decided not to, she deserves to be shamed and abused because of it.

•The sword symbolism plays a strong role within this theory because Anthy is the carrier of "the sword of Dios". A sword that is supposed to belong to a prince with pure heart and Anthy does have a pure heart but it's not a prince. I honestly have been seeing people say that the sword of Dios is Akio's sword but honestly it doesn't make a lot of sense to me because the one who carries it is Anthy, the only who releases it is Anthy. And when Akio takes the sword of Dios, it just breaks, showing that the sword does not belong to him.

•In the black rose arc, the whole arc is led by Mamiya and Mikage. Mamiya, who is later revealed to be Anthy, dressed as a man who looks oddly similar to the personification of Dios/illusion of Dios, and successfully deceiving Mikage and everyone else with that stolen identity, might be a key piece of Anthy being an androgynous person, which by itself doesn't mean she's trans (trans people can or cannot be androgynous) but it's an important point too;

Tbh i might be wrong, or i might have said something dumb since i haven't rewatched RGU in a while, but this is all I can recall

[thelunarfairy]

Só queria compartilhar meus pensamentos mesmo! Um abraço do Brasil! 😚💞

I really like TBHK because none of the characters are moralists. The main theme of the whole manga is "wishes", and we see the characters going to extremes to get what they want.

Yashiro literally delves into the occult to make Teru fall in love with her. Kou is willing to let a cannibal spirit (likely responsible for killing several students) roam the school. Hanako wants Yashiro to live and even killed her best friend to achieve that. Mitsuba admitted wanting everyone to die just so he wouldn't feel alone. And, to top it off, Sakura wants to destroy the entire planet just to be free.

But, ironically, what I least like about TBHK is definitely the development of these themes. I wish we could delve much more into what the characters think and feel. Despite going through absurd events, everyone just return to their normal life as if nothing happened. (Kou, in particular, bothers me. His brother said terrible things, the Red House messed with his head, and Mitsuba asked to be killed by him, but Kou never properly expresses his feelings.)

TBHK explores allegories between cannibalism and sex, delves into physical and emotional abuse, and even touches on suicidal tendencies. They're all children, and the whole situation is absurd, however, the characters always behave in the most childish way, as if nothing ever fazes them. The series has become overly infantilized over time, much like the art style.

Sometimes it's hard for me to connect with the characters or even believe that certain events would happen in the story due to all the absurdities the characters are exposed to.

I really miss the time when the biggest problem was a tree making people fall in love.

Ahhhh, obrigado por compartilhar seus pensamentos comigo 💞 Hahaha Outro abraço do Brasil para o Brasil XDD 😚

Could we blame the fingers that weave the story of JSHK? What did Aidairo choose to show us first? The mystery we have to unravel little by little, so that we can slowly appreciate it.

We start with a fun story and end up with an intensely emotional and tragic story. And here's what bothers me, I share this sentence with you:

"Despite going through absurd events, everyone just returns to their normal life as if nothing happened."

The silence between them and the events is intensely irritating. "No problem, we won't talk about it, let's pretend nothing happened."

We spend an entire arc watching a new situation arise, develop and conclude, so that at the beginning of another arc, they just let it all go.

JSHK has many themes and subplots, each of which must be developed simultaneously or at a specific time. Now is the time to find out about number seven's past, he wouldn't hide it from us if it was something good, am I wrong?

But as you said, the allegories, the forbidden or taboo themes. The story was shaped to attract and deceive. It's just a light and fun anime that turns into pain in most ways possible.

The story of two children who chose to die for some reason. Heavy theme, cute art style, oh, it's not the first time I've been fooled by this combination.

I believe the trend is getting worse, it's as if there is no going back. And yes, I hope we get to see character development, not just in self, but in relationships as well.

We could spend hours giving examples, but this is not the case. Like you, I hope this development happens for all of them.

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Hey, can we talk about how Weiss is the luckiest Member of RWBYJNPR?

Just real Quick?

Like no one should compare traumas, it's not a competition. But. like.

Weiss has suffered the least of them all? But was somehow also the worst of them in the beginning?

Because She had

Abusive father

absent, alcoholic mother

threat of being attacked because of her name

Has a scar over one eye, doesn't show signs of impairment

And then she got better as a person and personally suffered

Forced 'home' by evil father

getting kidnapped

getting stabbed with a spear

...

Home literally falls into the water

Watched her team fall into the void.

Ever After shenaningans?

That's it.

That's all her own personal suffering, and for a lot of that she had friends and family, like Klein or Winter, or RWBY! She even left WHitley alone when she was young, clinging to winter!

Compared to;

Ruby

Mom presumed dead

Dad was depressed

uncle was alcoholic

Raised mostly by sister

entered into a combat school early (This one IS negative for her)

Jumped into and active cannon

hunted for her eyes

watched a friend die in front of her. Like. Four times, even if one was a mouse and the other was an illusion

Watched Yang Take a hit and Fall into the coid, assumed she was dead.

a friend that came back to life died to another friend

feels the weight of the world is on her shoulders

LITERALLY ATTEMPTED SUICIDE

Yang

abandoned by mother

step mom presumed dead

father was horribly depressed

uncle was an alcolholic

had to raise sister

lost arm

abandoned by partner and sister.

Had to kill to survive

Self sacrificial tendencies.

Watched Sister she had raised attempt to Commit suicide

so yeah she's got abandonment issues

Blake

Is a minority, suffers from peoples racism.

Abusive, genocidal ex-boyfriend

Said Ex attempted to murder her and Yang, forcing them to kill him instead.

More Racism

Watched the woman she loved sacrifice herself.

AND JNPR

Jaune

His parents actively kept him from pursuing his dream

Criminally negligent, literally didn't know the basics of Hunting

Given Terrible romantic advice by dad

bullied, blackmailed, beat down on.

constantly belittled and denied by his crush (I don't blame weiss for saying no, but it still hurt him)

First person to believe in him Kissed him, Didn't believe in him, ran off to her death.

Suffered severe imposter syndrome and survivors guilt, along with depression and suicidal thoughts

never felt good enough

Nearly got Weiss killed because of Cinder

Took anger out on oscar, Regretted it

Nearly got his team killed because they agreed with his plan to steal an airship

Neo beat up his team! Stole the Relic of Knowledge!

Watched so many of his Friends fall into the Void

had to assist in a Friend's suicide

Family Sword (And therefore legacy) Broke

LEFT BEHIND BY WINTER, WHO COULD HAVE VERY EASILY SAVED HIM.

Lost in a Goddamn fairytale world for a decade or two, alone. on a beach. ALONE.

Drank poison because that's what the story said to do. Couldn't even fucking die right.

The Paper pleasers. Just everything with the paper pleasers

His friends, once reunited with him, thought he had gone insane (He kinda had lost it, but really who wouldn't have?) and They didn't believe him. That hurt.

Pyrrha and Penny Illusion by NeoCat

Damn Jaune really is the Spider-man of RWBY, isn't he. His story is fucking sorrowful.

Pyrrha

Put on a pedestal above her Peers, very lonely

Object of affection focused on someone else

Given a nonchoice to protect people.

Fucking Died. Has remained dead. haunts the narrative.

Ren

parents died

lived on the road most of his life

His power is literally emotional repression

only had Nora

Lost his new family in the Void.

Nora

presumably never had a dad

abandoned by Mother

Lived on the road

only had Ren

That Shock-Force-Field thing in Atlas, left with permanent scarring.

Family Fell into the Void.

So, like. Can Weiss spread the wealth a little bit? In terms of luck?

The rest of them could probably really use it.

OF COURSE

None of this is to say Weiss Hasn't Suffered, she really has suffered in her own ways.

But like.

Not as much as any one other individual in her group.

[zeta-in-de-walls]

Hey guys, I’m afraid I’m going to continue critiquing the DSMP finale. 

So, with the first two streams I don’t think there were any major issues. I dislike the Dream and Punz friendship personally as staged disc finale was my least favourite plot twist so seeing that actually cropping up in canon isn’t fun. Another arc where Tommy and Tubbo decide to go and kill Dream is a little dull too but theyre good at making it feel fresh enough. 

It’s with the third stream that issues really start making themselves known. Dream and Punz’s plan is not all that good or interesting, certainly not when none of these are going to be explored at all given that it’s the penultimate stream. Like, what does people’s limbos being determined on how they die mean? What did it matter? It doesn’t even fit with past canon! And why did the revive book allow Dream to mind control Ranboo? What even...? 

More importantly though, Tommy is forced to give up all his possessions in his enderchest. Then he has to sacrifice his discs. I am incensed by this plot point. It’s once again reminding us that Tommy’s made to lose everything again and again thanks to Dream and these sacrifices are portrayed as a positive thing? Loving things isn’t a problem and he shouldn’t have to learn again and again to give up all he has without being seen as selfish. Its not fun seeing this character beaten down again and again. I was hoping that the finale would subvert this idea once more and remind us that it was cruel and wrong and that Tommy deserves to be happy and live. 

Going into the final stream, I again hated that Tommy’s plan involved killing himself. Tommy’s character has low self-worth and has had suicidal thoughts so this is not a good plot! He should learn he has worth, not the opposite. He shouldn’t need to die for his friends and he certainly shouldn’t apologise for existing. His story was all about how it’s okay to be yourself. It was always thrilling to see him standing up and moving forward unafraid to stand for what he believes him no matter how much he was crushed. 

Sadly the finale exceeded my expectations for how bad it could be. 

All those ideas I mentioned? Discarded. Tommy plans to die... and does die. Tubbo dies as well, so the sacrifice meant nothing in the end. Everything was lost. All the memories and stuff that made the Dream SMP the special place that it was, gone in an instant. None of it mattered in the end. No one stepped in this time to save anyone. 

And yet, that’s not the worst thing. Because this stream doesn’t really focus on Tommy. It’s Dream’s story. Tommy in the prison realises that Dream is just a person in the end, who had reasons for what he was doing. His reasons were his friends except Tommy joining the server got in the way of that. According to Dream’s narrative, Tommy provoked him into becoming what he was and Dream has always secretly longed for those simpler times. 

Tommy finds understanding when he sees a memory of Dream before Tommy had joined being happy. And this causes Dream to have doubt and he makes it clear that he wants those times back, that he might give up on all his evil plans just like that. Tommy apologises to Dream for hurting him that first day and that’s apparently a sign of Tommy’s growth in finally learning to see the other perspective.

This plot is rancid. Dream makes no attempt to understand Tommy, not even a little. Despite Tommy repeatedly pointing out how much it all hurt and how much he’d suffered, Dream doesn’t show the slightest sympathy. Yet the narrative paints Tommy trying to understand him as this special thing? Like it was the solution all along. Dream can abuse people and cause immense suffering but its up to his victims to try and understand him? Why is the story telling us Tommy, an incredibly thoughtful character anyway, needed to learn understanding? Why is it hinting that Tommy and Dream were not so different and their stories mirrored each other, both secretly desiring the same things? 

Dreams motives are so flimsy and it makes so little sense that he’d question his plan now. Yet he asks whether its too late and you can see Tommy’s regret for the nuke plan. His whole sacrifice thing, is everyone’s doom. How cruel. Dream can ruin everyone’s happiness but the question we should be asking is ‘what about Dream’s happiness?’ apparently. 

And finally, we end u with the characters on a new world with amnesia. Though they’ve forgotten everything, we still see Tommy and Dream becoming friends and this is some sort of triumph, implying with what came before that yes Dream and Tommy could’ve been friends had Tommy not ruined Dream’s world by causing trouble on that first day. 

Annoyingly, so many of these points don’t even make much sense. Tommy has tried to understand Dream before. He visited in the prison for instance. Tommy wanting to kill Dream is framed as a bad thing, like it was wrong to have this fixation but this fails to recall how dangerous Dream is to Tommy and how he’s promised to kill him repeatedly in the past. Tommy had been living alone drinking invisibility potions in fear! 

Each element taken on their own is a problem, but the whole is so much worse than the sum of its parts. The bigger picture is that Tommy dies learning that his abuser was a person with feelings too that he screwed up and he ought to have been more understanding but his plan got himself and everyone he cared about killed. He is the monster that killed the server and everyone he loved.

[friends-to-lovers-tournament]

Friends to Lovers Tournament: Round 2, Side B, Match 7

propaganda under the cut!

Hidekane:

"Submission 1 Let me tell you, when I say they should have been canon, they should have been canon! Let's start from the beginning, shall we? (Major spoilers for the whole series lmao)

Hide and Kaneki met as children, around the ages of 7-10. Kaneki has always been a big bookworm while Hide has always been a big extrovert. Unbeknown to anyone yet, Hide had recently lost his father and was just adopted and was having a hard time adjusting and fitting in at this new school despite his cheerful personality. He kinda just walked up to Kaneki and asked to be his friend and he said yes.

They grew up together, Hide being Kaneki's only salvation in the world as he lost his mother and was stuck in a neglectful, nearly abusive situation living with his aunt. They usually just talked about stupid stuff, but Hide's friendship meant everything to Kaneki. Eventually, they began attending the same university, Kamii. Kaneki took literature while Hide studied foreign languages, majoring in English. They were only in their first year when Kaneki was involved in an accident. In this world, creatures known as ghouls exist among humans, look and act just like them, but they eat human flesh. It's the only thing their bodies can digest, everything else tastes disgusting and makes them sick.

Kaneki went out with a girl, but found out she was actually a ghoul when she tried to eat him. He ran away into a construction zone where steel beams fell on the girl and he passed out. He was rushed to the hospital and needed a kidney transplant, but the hospital had none and so they used the girl's, or so the doctor said. In reality, the doctor transplanted the girl's kakuho, an organ unique to ghouls, into him. Slowly, Kaneki began to notice changes to his body. Food tasted gross and people started to sound appetizing (this all sounds off topic but trust me it's necessary to understand the depths of Kaneki and Hide's relationship).

While dealing with this revalation, Kaneki skipped out on quite a few days of class. Once he retuned, Hide immediately hugged him, saying that he's been lonely and that rabbits die of loneliness. Later in the day, Hide is attacked by a ghoul and knocked unconscious while Kaneki tries to fight the ghoul off. Kaneki is very weak at this point and can't do much, but tries to defend his friend until the bitter end. When it really looks like Hide is about to die and be eaten, Kaneki is able to unleash his kagune (a hunting limb/organ thing ghouls use to fight) to fight off the ghoul and save Hide. The two of them are saved and cared for, and Kaneki talks to another ghoul about how he's no longer human in the same room Hide is sleeping in but little does he know that Hide is actually awake.

They started drifting away because of this, with Kaneki wanting to keep Hide out of danger. At one point, Kaneki is kidnapped and goes missing and so Hide spends his time looking for him, tailing shady people, and joining the CCG (Comission of Counter Ghoul, aka the ghoul cops) as an intern to look for files on him. Eventually a few months later, they find each other again. Kaneki has changed a lot, having been tortured and been through a lot of other stuff. The CCG is on a mission called the Owl Execution Operation to locate and kill an extremely powerful ghoul known as the Owl with Kaneki fighting on the side of the ghouls and Hide (technically) with the CCG. Kaneki is beginning to lose his mind while struggling to regenerate a severe wound when Hide shows up. Kaneki freaks out because he doesn't want Hide to know that he's a ghoul, but Hide just pats him on the shoulder and says ""I knew all along man!"" There's a very strong CCG fighter blocking the only exit to the area and Kaneki needs to be at full strength to have a chance at winning so Hide tells Kaneki to eat him. Kaneki gives Hide one hell of a kiss, eating his lips and part of his cheek and neck.

Flash forward three/four years later, Kaneki had amnesia but regained his memories at this point. Kaneki is fighting an extremely strong adversary and is losing horribly. He is about to drown when Hide appears in his dreams. They talk about the situation, joking around a bit too. Kaneki cries, saying how much he misses him, with Hide responding ""what are you, a rabbit?"" Hide convinces Kaneki to keep fighting and not to throw his life away, saying ""it may not be stylish, but live."

Meanwhile, the real Hide has dedicated his life to finding help for Kaneki these last few years. After some really big stuff that I can't even begin to explain happens, Hide comes out from the shadows and takes the lead in helping Kaneki out of this shitshow of a situation. When one person asks ""why go this far for Ken Kaneki?"", Hide simply responds ""Because I love him.""

Submission 2

They're lifelong friends. Kaneki has a bad family history and Hide looks like a sunflower and has the personality of a golden retriever. When Kaneki gets turned into a ghoul, Hide figures it out pretty much immediately and doesn't say anything, because he's waiting for Kaneki to feel comfortable enough to confess. Even as Kaneki drifts away, Hide gets more and more involved in the world of ghouls so he can continue looking after him. At the end of the first series, Kaneki ends up starved for human flesh and on the brink of being captured. Hide, who has joined the enemy side because it's the only way to stay close, finds him in the sewers and offers himself to be eaten. Fade to black.

In the second series, when Kaneki regains his memories, he wants to die in style, like he thinks Hide did, protecting the people he loves. His hallucinations of Hide talk him out of this. He gets ghoul-married to another ghoul by leaving non-fatal bites on each other. This is relevant because Hide isn't dead; just heavily scarred (his jaw and throat are just gone, like a makeout session gone very badly), and he's been going around in disguise as a scarecrow for the past several years, manipulating things so that Kaneki will be as safe as possible.

Percabeth:

Submission 1

they are the cutest thing ever with 5 books of slow burn

Submission 2

HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THEM?? THEY ARE THE BEST OTP! THEY START OFF WITH UNCERTAINTIES BUT ANNABETH CHOOSES TO BE HIS FRIEND, HER FIRST INDEPENDENT STEP TO NOT CONSIDER THE OLYMPIAN'S WISHES WHEN MAKING CHOICES. SHE IGNORED HER MOM'S OPINION GUYS, THAT IS BIG! AND HE DOESNT REALLY HAVE FRIENDS UNTIL THE SUMMER HE TURNS 13 AND SHE IS ONE OF THEM. SHE AND HIM ARE ALWAYS BY EACHOTHER'S SIDES (METAPHORICALLY AT LEAST). THEY WORK TOGETHER ON QUESTS SOO WELL BECAUSE THEY KNOW EACH OTHER THAT WELL. AND SHE KISSED THEM DURING THE LABYRINTH QUEST AND HE KINDA IGNORED IT FOR LIKE A YEAR. AND SHE WAS HIS ANCHOR TO THE MORTAL WORLD. AND HE TOLD HER ABOUT HIS ACHILLES HEEL. AND SHE BACKS HIM UP ALL THE TIME. AND IT WAS THE GREATEST UNDERWATER KISS OF ALL TIME. AND WHEN HE WENT MISSING SHE DID NOT SLEEP. AND SHE WAS ALL HE REMEMBERED WHEN HERA TRIED HER SHENANIGANS. AND THEY FELL TOGETHER. AND THEY ARE EACH OTHERS BEST FRIENDS (sorry grover, but you get it) AND I LOVE THEM TOGETHER SO MUCH. THEY EMAILED EACH OTHER AT 13 BECAUSE CELL PHONES WERE A BIG N O! AND HE KEPT A PICTURE OF HER IN HIS BINDER. AND SHE WANTS TO BUILD SOMETHING PERMANENT WITH HIM.

[magnorious]

Percy Jackson and Why the Best Villains are Right

Spoilers for Percy Jackson and the Olympians books 1-5!

Disney isn’t known for fantastic twist villains, and with the upcoming PJO show on Disney+, it’s high time we show some appreciation for a fantastic twist villain, before Disney (potentially) ruins him.

For those who haven’t read the books in a while, Luke Castellan is a son of Hermes, the god of many things whose cabin at Camp Half-Blood also takes in all the demigods who haven’t been claimed by their godly parent, and who might never be. At first, Luke seems like a great guy, nothing seems off about him until the twist and all these little seeds you didn’t see earlier start to sprout.

Spoilers for the entire first series: Luke is seventeen in TLT. He spends the next four books a full-blown villain raising monster armies and turning other demigods to the side of Kronos, a titan who wants to rise and destroy the gods. Percy and the other good guys don’t understand why Luke and these other demigods would join forces with the dark side. They’re going to have to fight their friends, help murder their parents, and probably help destroy the world.

The easy way out would be just to paint these kids like Rowling did with Slytherin and make them all delinquent bastards. Riordan didn’t do that. As the books go on there’s an undercurrent, sometimes blatantly obvious, of godly neglect. The gods go around sleeping with mortals on a whim to have demigods around to do their bidding, leading often to tragically short lives, violent deaths, and scarred mortal parents. The number of unclaimed kids in the Hermes cabin keeps rising and while Protagonist Percy’s dad Poseidon is pretty decent, he’s not exactly deadbeat father of the year.

If anyone’s godly dad of the year it’s Hades but that’s not important right now. So the books progress and we get all these little nuggets of doubt sprouting against the gods. Kids that get sent on quests and don’t come back, gods who take an eye for an eye literally, who very much only see these kids as tools and a means to an end.

Luke, meanwhile, ends up allowing himself to become the host body for Kronos’ spirit. This desperate seventeen year old looking for guidance where he has none, joins the *bad crowd* for recognition and acceptance and praise, because he’s spent his life bitter and unloved by all-powerful gods who don’t understand or care that they’re still supposed to be parents to their kids.

All five books have been leading up to this climactic Great Prophecy that goes as follows:

“A halfblood of the eldest gods shall reach sixteen against all odds And see the world in endless sleep the hero’s soul, cursed blade shall reap A single choice shall end his days Olympus to preserve or raze.”

Naturally Percy and the audience assume that the prophecy obviously means that Percy’s going to get his soul reaped by a cursed blade to decide the fate of olympus.

But that’s not what happens.

The prophecy is actually talking about two different people. The first half is unmistakably Percy, he’s the only halfblood of the eldest gods eligible. But the second half, the owner of the “hero’s soul” is actually Luke. We just don’t realize that until the page where Luke stabs himself with the knife he gave to Annabeth, cursed because he betrayed his promise to her and destroyed their friendship.

Luke dies a hero, stabbing himself and killing Kronos’ host body before Kronos can attain full power and become unstoppable. He dies a hero because he was never the villain. Yes we’re responsible for our own actions and actions have consequences but Luke did die to right his wrongs.

All he wants, as he’s dying in front of Percy, is for Percy to make sure that every unclaimed and unloved kid in his cabin and beyond is shown the respect they deserve. It’s all he’s wanted the entire series and has just been groomed and manipulated by an equally abusive entity to satisfy their own ends.

So in the end, when Olympus is saved and Percy’s staring down the barrel of a wish for literally anything, immortality and godhood included, he says no. He says Kronos happened because of them. Luke happened because of them. They were neglectful parents, so their unloved kids came to resent them enough to not care if the world got destroyed if it meant justice was served.

Luke, in the end, was right. So the gods agree to do better (whether they actually do kinda gets sidetracked by the plot of books six through ten but that’s not the point here).

Children’s media, and adult media, should really take a page out of the Percy Jackson books on how to write a villain. It would not have been the same beloved story it is today had Luke just become irredeemably pure evil and Kronos been more than a phantom voice for 90% of the story. If the gods were awesome attentive parents and Luke came along whining about not getting even more attention, he’d be seen as a selfish, entitled brat.

But he’s not. This story does what a thousand other YA and children’s books do and that’s make world-saving heroes out of children. But these books are in the minority by recognizing how tragic it is to force twelve, thirteen, fourteen year olds into fighting for their lives and dying for a god who can’t be bothered to remember who they are. It’s based on Greek mythology. It wouldn’t be faithful to the source material without a fat dose of tragedy.

Yeah, it’s cool to be a special demigod with water powers and flight and necromancy, but no one wants to be a Hermes kid for a very tragic reason.

[neoncolorblocks]

you should totally share your 2012 tmnt opinions bc i already know your based af

I don’t know how based my opinions really are but I’ll share some for you. My opinions are based off my experiences as a kid when I watched it so I’m kinda biased to certain things. I’m currently doing a rewatch of 2012 so some of these might change for me later. Some of them are opinions and others are based off my own headcannons. I’ll make two lists.

My opinions

None of the brothers are abusive to eachother I will die on this hill.

Seriously tho Mikey’s older bros like him they just get annoyed sometimes, it’s not even just Mikey every bro got annoyed with eachother at some point.

The show sometimes has a ‘ew feelings’ vibe when emotional development could’ve fixed some of the problems in the show

Splinter tried his best, he messed up but I don’t think he was abusive to the turtles. But overall he dealt with the cards he got the best he can despite losing a child and then gaining 4 more on accident.

The pressure put on Leo to be a leader and eventual caretaker for his family isolated him from his brothers and detrimentally affected him as a teen.

Watching him talk to a hologram of his only adult figure while his 3 same aged bros were outside broke me dude. Probably an older sibling thing but going to people you’ve been taught to look after for your emotional grief is almost impossible tbh

Raph and Donnie in true middle sibling fashion get sidelined when it comes to development sometimes.

Raph obviously struggles with feeling misunderstood and feels isolated, it causes him to lash out. His position as the team defender naturally makes him more inclined to value his bros over himself and it took a toll on his self worth and identity. Slash and Destroy kinda hurts man.

Leo got saddled with eldest daughter syndrome and ascended from big bro to mom. He’s jealous of Karai because she wasn’t shouldered with the responsibility he has but he also wouldn’t trade it for anything either.

Setting the romance arc aside, Karai’s a fun character to watch. Sometimes I’m like “Go girl! Kill them!”

Idk why people don’t love 2012 Casey more, he’s one of the only charming teenage troublemakers I’ve seen written well. Dudes hilarious

2012 April is not that bad, I was fine with the weird admiration triangle thing she Casey and Donnie had. Girl really loved the turtles and Splinter even without the romance subplot.

Leo killing Shredder was justified, it was an act of vengeance and revenge.

Raph, Donnie, and Mikey could’ve also been good leaders but they trust Leo to keep them safe more than the others.

Mikey’s high adaptive ability is overlooked but is a really good trait for a martial artist. Treating Mikey as a defenseless little kid makes little to no sense when he is the most adaptable physically and emotionally and the most intuitive bro. Mikey could take all of his bros if he needed to imo

Donnie’s sass has a body count

I think people forget that the bros are the same age, it’s such a big deal that they’re technically the same age. Like with Rise, we all know Raph’s the oldest and he acts and is treated as the oldest but in 2012 it feels much more like Leo was chosen to be the oldest. Splinter treats Leo as the oldest but the turtles see Leo as the same age and equal to them. It’s so uniquely jarring to have Splinter set Leo aside and tell him he has this responsibility and he has to be a parental figure to people who are the same age as him. And then having his brothers and teammates treat him like he’s a kid like them and openly challenge the principles hammered into him by his dad is too relatable to me lol. Like the power imbalance exists but at the same time it doesn’t, I have so many thoughts about Leo send help

The “rong” scene is possibly one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.

Leo’s leg should’ve been a reoccurring thing, when a joint is dislocated it’s very easy to dislocate it again. One of my sibs dislocated their shoulder fighting, dislocated it again on accident and will need surgery someday to fully repair it.

I enjoyed the farmhouse arc and how it gave the characters more internal conflict and interpersonal conflict. Their dynamics shined in some of those episodes

If Leo wasn’t the leader he’d be the inside man and team medic.

The team is split as such: Leo-leader and strategist, Raph-brawler and defender, Donnie-tech specialist and medic, Mikey- wildcard and team morale maintainer

My headcannons that make the series better for only me

Leo and Raph are the twins ever

Mikey’s actually the most naturally talented martial artist but is too busy having fun to train seriously.

Donatello’s mutagen medicine was faulty because he wasn’t the team medic and never made something like medicine before. Leo was the medic and since Donatello was able to learn med procedures fast and knows their biology he opted to be the temp medic. He’s really well suited to it too despite the pressure and anxiety. He became the official team medic after the farmhouse arc.

Splinter didn’t want his sons to get too attached to him because turtles obviously out live rats by a wide margin and he knew he would only be in a small fraction of their lives. That’s a big reason why he was distant from them.

The other reason being losing Karai and thinking she was dead for 15 years.

Raph and Mikey are smart and reasonable like Leo and Donnie but like annoying their bros with chaos.

Donnie’s not actually a caffeine addict, the anxiety just powers him through anything.

Someone finally sat Leo down and made him understand that the team dynamic in Star Trek is what led to success on the show. Not just the captain.

Getting badly injured by Shredder ramped Leo’s mom protective instinct and self sacrifice to a solid 13. Going through the kind of pain your siblings could’ve went through does things to a sibling. Unfortunately for him, getting hurt so bad ramped up his siblings’ protective antics and now he has to deal with his own antics happening to him.

Donatello could build super villain weaponry but stopped when Mikey kept referring to his rocket launcher as the turtle-gun.

Donnie will definitely develop resentment to splinter later in life. Not because he hates Splinter but because Donatello is one of the more observant and intelligent turtles. When he gets more mature he’s going to realize that things were messed up far more than they ever needed to be.

Raph had a little mob of birds, rats, and cats follow him around in the city for food and pets.

Raph paints as one of his anger management techniques but had to stop when Mikey kept taking his paints.

If he had more confidence in himself Raph would make a decent leader

Leo’s strong moral code is what gave him the ability to kill shredder, earlier in the series he’s very against killing henchmen. Completely shutting it down. But after Shredder had betrayed Splinter, killed his mom, separated his sister from them and abused her, killed Splinter, almost killed his bros and himself multiple times and tried to destroy his home over and over again. Leo finally killed him. He made that choice after all he went through because he had to or it would never end. Of course the other kills aren’t as relevant but shredders kill is so important to the story and the characters. imo of course

I will have more things to say when I’m done refreshing myself on TMNT 2012 canon. Please remember that these are my opinions and headcannons. I’m not out to change anyone’s opinions on the show or cannon. These are just my own thoughts and that’s it.

Thanks for asking anon!

[ystrike1]

You Are My Devil - By 김빠 (6.5/10)

Wasted potential is always sad. The webtoon adaptation for this is cheap, because the ending is bad. Multiple reviews of the original novel implied that the author rushed the ending, and the spoilers I read are barely sub-par. This isn't enemies to lovers. It's about an unexplained obsession, and two characters who give up on their main goals for no reason.

Heina is princess of Constance. The land of flowers and plenty. Her people are not war folk. They grew complacent, so they were quickly overthrown by the desert empire of Nicke.

Heina watches her fiance die during a duel with the fourth prince of Nicke, Yuri. Yuri takes her as a prize for winning, and her parents are powerless to stop the prince. The Emperor of Nicke is a shrewd general, and Yuri is known as the best solider in the world.

Heina tries to kill herself and she tries to escape seven times. She is tormented by Yuri's odd behavior. He seems obsessed with her

...but he isn't??? He leaves her alone for long periods of time, and the Emperor plans to sacrifice her during the rain ceremony. Which is a ceremony only the Nicke family can perform. Yuri doesn't want to kill her, but he doesn’t actually try to help for a long time. Heina lives as his prisoner knowing her days are numbered.

Yuri threatens to destroy Constance and her family if she kills herself. He doesn't even want her to cut her hair without his permission. His character design is also good.

Prince Yuri sleeps by her side when he isn't busy killing. He kisses her hair. He seems to adore her, but he doesn't care about her feelings. He is feared because a prophecy stated he will end Nicke. I THOUGHT this maybe meant he would abandon his abusive family that branded him a bad omen. To, you know, wed the woman he is obsessed with and rule over Constance with her. After annexing Nicke with his epic army powers....but noooooo.

We get one good scene where Yuri tries to show her how beautiful the desert can be. The problem is he killed her fiance. She actually loved her fiance, Argen. One speech about the moon doesn't win her heart.

Shocker.

But wait...

This is the Emperor of Nicke. He has three sons. Yuri is a fake. An orphan from the desert destined to become a powerful warrior. Emperor Genius here took him in, to use him as a rival figure for his sons. It's actually kind of a good idea. Introduce a brilliant and strong rival...that isn't actually a threat. Yuri can never summon rain for Nicke, so he's a decent punching bag for the real sons to use.

Oops. One true son is blind and he can't rule. Camille is also on Yuri's side, because Yuri is the best potential Emperor. His magical soldier skills are exactly what a violent nation like Nicke needs.

The current true heir, Pecsis, is a wimp. His mommy put him in line for the throne. He plays with poisons and he's crap at fighting. The Emperor is now in a pickle. The best heir isn't his son. The third son is already prime Minister, and unable to do Emperor things.

Shot yourself in the foot there, huh idiot?

The plot twists are shocking...ly bad. Argen is alive. A body double died in the duel. He returns with an army to reclaim his beloved princess. She rejects him by the time he arrives to save her, because she falls for Yuri. No. There is no real reason. Then, Yuri loses against Argen on purpose. He wants Heina to be a happy Empress, and eventually he figures out that he isn't a real prince. Which is why he was always disposable and sent to war. Heina probably falls for him because he saves her from being sacrificed...and because she pities him. That's not love...the ending is just sad. Heina and Yuri choose to live in the desert together. Their daughter returns from the sands alone, to become the true heir of Nicke and Constance.

Um.

You skipped the good parts???? Literally all of the good parts????

Yuri had Heina imprisoned for a year, and none of that is shown. We don't see WHY he is obsessed with her. Why he was willing to throw down his helmet and let her be happy with Argen??? It just doesn't make sense. Heina is an extremely prideful princess too, who LOVES her people. She doesn't commit suicide to protect them from Yuri's wrath. Her...leaving??? To live in a HOLE??? In the desert??? When she loves her homeland and family so much is a joke. Yuri SHOULD HAVE sacrificed his family to bring prosperity to Constance. THAT WOULD HAVE MADE SENSE. Since their gods said he was destined to destroy Nicke ANYWAY???? lame.