#and of course Sam wanted to respect Cas’s wishes he knows what it’s like to have your choices be disregarded

[wrenwinchester]

When Lucifer killed Cas, and Mary sacrificed herself for Sam and Dean, both of them were heartbroken.

Sam reacted how Cas would have wanted him to (he wanted Jack to get a chance to save the world), Dean reacted how Dean always reacts, emotionally and defensively.

[girlwithonegoal]

sorry but the only reason destiel even works is because wincest did it first and also better

i've been thinking a LOT about this and want to get it all out so here it is. if dean was truly in love with cas, he would not have hesitated to tell him so when he literally knew cas was about to DIE. we don't see that. we see shock, grief, disbelief (an angel loves me!), we see him trying desperately to process his best friend is leaving him but nowhere does dean say, or imply, with his eyes, or words, that he's in love with cas. of course he loves cas - cas is family - and cas is not exactly his brother, (closest is brother-in-arms), despite his insistence in an earlier episode - but he's not in the kind of soul-crushing love that cas is with him. he's not in love with cas, and can't be, because he's already in love with sam.

when dean dies, he gets as close as he possibly can to confessing to sam he's in love with him without actually crossing the line. he would never to that to sam - he would never do to sam what cas did to him - because he would NEVER do anything to make sam lose his agency (sidebar: not that cas doesn't respect dean. but his love confession is almost wish fulfillment - i'm going to confess to dean i love him and go out in a blaze of glory and then leave without dean ever even having to reciprocate because i know he doesn't love me back. and he's absolutely right).

dean has already had years and years of not having his own agency from john his whole fucking life! john did whatever he wanted to dean and dean took it because like hell was he going to subject sam to that bullshit. which brings us to sam and dean's childhood - not much is known of their early years before sam went to stanford and that's fully on purpose. we can almost see dean as not only a brother figure to sam but also a father figure. john leaving for weeks maybe even months at a time - how the hell did dean and sam manage to survive? by dean doing whatever he had to do. emphasis on whatever.

you see, john absolutely knows that dean is beautiful. whether you read their relationship as purely abusive or abusive with a sexual component - dean definitely did questionable things to get food on the table for sam, an aspect that's more in fanon that canon but reads true to the heart of the show. sam doesn't know because dean wanted a normal childhood for him. and dean would rather die and go to hell for 800 years than force sam to make a choice, make any choice, of a romantic and/or sexual nature related to him.

back to dean's death. this is again the closest thing to a love confession that dean can make - my baby brother - take out the word brother and it would be not only romantic but stunningly true - he raised sam, this child who grew up to be a man, this child who loves him - waiting outside sam's dorm for hours - can you picture him pacing in the snow, waiting for the one thing he wants but can't have??? why does that sound familiar? oh, right, because that's what cas said but in dean and sam's case it would be actually true. how cruel and unbelievably insane it is to find your soulmate in your brother, the one person you have that you love unconditionally, not just because they are your family but because you are in love with them, and you can never have them as long as you live.

re: american gothic and soulmatism. very different from crimson peak where thomas fully realizes the unhealthiness of the codependent incestuous relationship with his sister and wants to be free and happy with edith. but sam and dean don't want to be free. in their minds, they already are free as long as they have each other and only each other. not getting in all the other romantic relationships that the brothers have with other people bc it would take too long, but they already fulfill that need for each other and don't need anyone else...like i'm sorry i love my sister but i want to get married one day to someone else. if you read their relationship as purely platonic, it doesn't work at ALL.

the kripke early seasons fully leaned into the gothic horror aspect of it all and incest is definitely a part of that...dean and sam literally cannot live without each other. they can't do it! sam dies in dean's arms and dean can't even wait five fucking minutes without making a deal with a demon lmao. he can't eat. he can't sleep. their love is a perpetual resurrection; they keep killing each other and bringing each other back to life. because they don't know how to stop. they are a singular mangled fucked up entity. i read a fic once where the author described sam as hating his own body because it was separate from dean's and dean's whole presence was a phantom pain. and yeah. just yeah. they can't live without each other because they ARE each other.

seasons 1-3 to me are spn at its soul. that's it. cas only works as a side character, if he's a brother (like, purely platonically) to both sam and dean or just unrequited romantic love for dean. the trope of an angel falling in love with a faithless man who can't pray only works if dean hasn't been in love with sam the whole time.

[ice-sculptures]

it's been a long, long time 🛡️❄️

I’m very intrigued about this one 👀

hi sandy!! so as you probably already know, i'm a huge fan of steve & bucky, and when i first started shipping byler i couldn't help but notice how many similarities their story shared with stevebucky, and the little goblin in my brain encouraged me to start writing a retelling of CA: TWS (movie of all time) but with the ST characters, starring:

mike as steve (the paladin, knight in shining armor)

will as bucky (possession arc & brainwashing arc)

max as natasha

lucas as sam

the first half of the fic will be centered around the friendship between mike and max (and later lucas) and the second will be more focused on mike and will, like the original film. of course, it wouldn't follow the plot exactly, since i do want to incorporate henry, brenner, and hawkins lab into the story, as well as add a few more scenes to explore mike's mental state once he comes out of the ice and adjusts to modern life, but most of the major beats of the movie will stay the same and most importantly, will and mike's emotional bond will be given the respect it deserves 😤 (and a happy ending ofc)

i also wanted to switch things up a bit and give peggy's role in the story to nancy (non-romantically, obviously 😅) since peggy's conflict about not being taken seriously as a woman in her workplace is very similar to what nancy faced in s3, and i think it would be more impactful for mike to have a platonic, familial bond from the past.

i wish i could give you a snippet, since i actually have the iconic 'who the hell is bucky will' scene fully written, but it's on my other laptop, which is currently being repaired 😭 but i do have this little concept that i wrote a while ago, if you're interested in reading it :')

[mittensmorgul]

hello!

note-taking anon here! life was busy (in a mostly good way) so spn watching was not happening. However. I have now watched 15x07 and 15x08.

Last Call was a lot of fun. It's really neat to explore dean through other characters, but especially someone like lee. The implications. It's so interesting to see another side of the coin. A what if.

It's also so fun to bring a character from before canon. Lee knows nothing of the only dean we know. But yet he still knows him. And it's also a testament to see how dean's grown. The conversation about john aches brilliantly.

Christian kane is always a lot of fun and he's great here. The lighting is obviously excellent, as are the metaphors and parallels. A really great episode on deans side.

Im also so partial to all the eileen scenes. She's such a great character. Full of charisma and charm, while also being very distinct. Her and sam are a lot of fun.

The shots in this ep are also really nice. Lots of creative camera work and editing. There's character to it.

15x08 really feels like a buckleming ep at times. One of their strengths is exploring characters that arent sam and dean. So writing for adam/michael actually worked really well. I think it was clever to bring them back, and not in the typical 'over the top' clever that buckleming can often go for. Jabel is fantastic. All the right beats. The anger. The relief. The comedy. The shifts between michael and adam. Really good.

It was nice to see cas get to be clever again. The show sometimes forgets he's smart. I also thought the moments between dean and adam were well done. I wish we had more of sam and adam, but alas.

I enjoyed seeing more of sam and eileen's relationship and communication. I like that eileen's not afraid to be like dude. Too much. And sam respects that and is trying. Plus, dean's reaction to sam being happy. It's very sweet. Honestly, one of my favourite moments in the show probably ever. We don't see enough of the boys being actual siblings.

The directing in this, from speight, is also fantastic. Theres so many shots where the tension and chasm between dean and cas is so evident. It hurts to watch. In a good way. It screams wrong which is what it's supposed to.

The only thing i dont get is the portal shenanigans at the very end. Michael could've waited for them to gather things and prep before opening it. Now, maybe he's overwhelmed with emotions sure. But dude you kinda need them to succeed. And of course, i question why only 12 hours open. But we're never getting a reason, it just simply is 😂

Ultimately, some really good episodes leading into one that i know is excellent.

I hope you are well!

hi hi! It's so good to hear from you again! And yeah, you're about to tip over into the end run, so much angst!

And yeah, the portal opening, with a time limit, is... for tension purposes lol :'D

I wish I had more time to reply more thoroughly, but I didn't want to leave this sitting in my inbox any longer and forget to post it at all, but let's just say I'm vibrating with excitement for you to get to the next episode :D

[self-loathing-angel-of-thursday2]

Beautiful Spouse’s Thoughts SPN 06x18

Frontierland

“Gankity gank”

“Is this the same set during the psychic kids episode?”

“It’s high noon”

Since Spouse doesn’t want any background info, I can’t tell him about Jensen’s cowboy kink

“Oh.my.god” to the Western themed title card

“Misha Collins” idk why he said the name

“This is a weird choice of music for searching the library”

“Wouldn’t they know better by now that all the myths are real?”

Dean really is a nerd for knowing the Star Trek movies

“Does Cas have a secretary now?”

Rachel really doesn’t like the boys

Laughed at aim lower from Bobby

Zippers were invented in 1851 so I guess they wouldn’t be too out of place 

“Of course Dean isn’t kidding about the saloon girls”

“Oh my god. That’s so bad” to the Clint Eastwood and Walker Texas Ranger jokes 

Funny that Jared is now playing Walker 

“Dean is so fucking happy to be in the Old West.”

Laughed at Dean spitting out the whiskey

“The Judge was pretty old”

“Oh my god” to the posse joke

“Dean’s fucking face, dude”

“Looks like Sam’s never been on a horse in his fucking life. Yup. Never been on a horse”

“That was a stunt man” the overhead shot

“That was a neat effect they did with the Phoenix kill”

“All the biblical names hurt” to the angel names

“She almost ended Cas there”

Poor Cas. He’s making some bad decisions lately.

Cas went to Bobby’s house when he got hurt. He didn’t go back to Heaven.

“Is Cas making a banishment signal?”

“I have a feeling that this trip is going to last longer than 24hrs”

“Is Dean going to find a pretty barmaid now?”

“Of course the badge and spurs survived the burn”

“Dean’s probably corrupt enough to be a sheriff”

“Is that actor Clint Eastwood? They should have gotten him for this role”

“What a shitty time to be alive. Everyone is walking around paranoid with guns”

Laughed at the howdy pilgrim. I ain’t a pilgrim. 

“What’s gank?” Then laughed

Spouse is enjoying this episode and its stupid jokes. He’s going to like the Levi season with all the dick jokes

“Way to spring all that info on him, Sam”

“Cas is so literal” then laughed

Laughed at I need you to let me touch it 

I wish we had more Bobby/Cas interactions overall. They seem to respect each other pretty well, and they seem to understand each other.

“Is Cas going to bring them home too soon?”

“Dean is living out a childhood dream, Sam. Get over it”

“Looks like some kinky shit with Bobby and Cas”

“Go get them ashes, bud”

“Saw that coming”

“Didn’t see the package thing coming”

“There would be more baling wire and twine”

“Where’s the Colt?”

“A soul-onoscopy?” Hahaha

“That was so fucking ridiculous.”

[clairenatural]

i had a dream that sam and dean took cas to an art museum and showed him all these paintings of angels and it was like that scene in vincent and the doctor and cas said these paintings are beautiful because they depict the angels as human when a true angel could never be described as anything but monstrous and i woke up crying

anon i love this SO much. i love it so much i had to write it. this is 1.4k, destiel, human!cas

They’re making their way out of the city, monster killed and day saved, when Castiel sees a poster, pasted up on the side of the plywood wall of a construction site. It’s an angel—he doesn’t recognize the artist, but he’d guess late 19th century. Be Not Afraid: a History of Angels in Art, it proclaims, the logo of the city’s largest art gallery tucked into the corner.

Castiel stares at it. The angel on the poster stares back, wings spread and staff raised. Valiant. Something in his heart twitches, but it’s hard to place. He still has his blade, tucked safely into the trunk with the rest of their frequently used weapons, and he never had wings like that; even the shadows, the ones they showed to humans, were simply the closest representation to the real thing possible in this dimension (his back aches anyway, dimly, his human body reacting to the loss as if they were real severed appendages. He ignores it).

Dean notices, because of course he does. He stops, because of course he does, and flags Sam down before his long legs can carry him too far ahead. “Hey. You good?”

Castiel isn’t sure how long he’s been staring at the poster, but it’s long enough that Dean is obviously concerned. “Hm? Oh. Yes, I’m—I’m fine.”

Dean nods but doesn’t move. He considers the poster. “Art gallery, huh?” he asks, avoiding the obvious elephant. Castiel appreciates it. He nods back.

“I’ve never been to one,” he offers, as explanation. It seems odd—he can remember the painting of the Sistine Chapel, he remembers watching with fascination as humans began collecting the smaller paintings into collections and museums, but he’d never been inside one. It hadn’t seemed necessary. Humans collect art in large boxes to remember their history, but Castiel has seen it all.

Dean seems surprised by this. “Seriously?” Castiel nods, and there’s a pause, and he’s about to turn and keep heading towards the car, and Kansas, and home, when Dean claps him on the shoulder and turns to call over his own.

“Sammy! How do you feel about seeing some art?”

“You want to go to an art gallery?” Sam sounds incredulous, and is closer behind him than Cas expected. He hadn’t noticed him retreat the half-block he’d managed to gain on them.

“Yeah, why not? Come on. What happened to ‘a little culture wouldn’t hurt, Dean?’”

"What happened to ‘I’ve got plenty of culture, eat your damn burger?’”

“It’ll be fun, Sam,” Dean counters. Something in his tone has changed. Cas doesn’t think too hard about it.

There’s a long pause, and Cas knows there’s some sort of communication happening he can’t hear or see. “…Okay,” Sam concedes. “Okay, sure. Yeah. Let’s go.”

So they do.

Dean makes a comment about “haven’t been in one of these since I was a kid,” before they all fall into the hushed silence of the museum floor. It’s nice—nicer than Castiel had expected. Not in aesthetics; the building is sleek, and modern, and the art is obviously beautiful. But it’s nice to be there. It feels almost Holy—humans, funny creatures they are, with their habit of treating their own culture with the respect of something divine. Creating houses of worship out of museums and libraries and living rooms. 

He wanders through the various exhibits but doesn’t really pay attention until he ends up in the exhibit from the poster. He’d managed to lose the Winchesters halfway through the photography exhibit, when both the brothers had gotten distracted. Castiel had continued onward anyway, on a mission, and by the time he finds himself walking into the angel exhibit he’s on his own.

He comes to a stop in front of one of the largest paintings in the room. It’s not the same angel as the poster. It’s several, actually, looking over what appears to be Mary and a baby Jesus. The angels are beautiful—smooth, flawless skin. They have long hair that looks soft, even in paint. They’re wearing white robes, and their wings are white and dove-like. None of these angels have several heads, rotating bands of fire, or thousands of eyes. They’re beautiful, but they aren’t angels. The human who painted this didn’t know that, of course—none of them did. Humanity was faced with the concept of divinity and conceptualized it as a version of itself.

“The real things ain’t as cuddly, huh?”

Dean’s voice startles him, which he hates, both because he hates being startled and because he’s still adjusting to Dean being able to sneak up on him.

“I was just thinking,” he starts, pretending he’d known Dean was there the whole time, “you paint us like we’re human.” Not ‘us’ anymore, he reminds himself, but he brushes that thought off. Not now.

Beside him, Dean snorts. “Yeah, well. If you’d told any of those Renaissance guys that the real angels are dickhead balls of celestial intent, they’d’ve arrested you for heresy.”

Castiel shakes his head. “No.” he pauses. “Well, yes. But that’s—” he turns to face Dean for the first time. He notices Sam over Dean’s shoulder, focusing intently on a painting a few feet away and obviously pretending not to listen.

“My father—God—Chuck,” he cycles through, which will never not be weird, “created us first, but not in his image. We weren’t worthy of that. Only you were. Humans, his perfect creation, modeled after their creator. But then—” he turns back to the painting and gestures to it. “You created us in your image. You thought about divinity and you couldn’t conceive anything more Holy than yourselves.”

Dean shifts. He tries for a laugh, but it comes out short. “Well, damn, Cas. Way to make a guy feel self-centered.”

Castiel turns back to him. He blinks. He frowns. That’s not what he means. “Most of my siblings thought so,” he agrees. “But I always thought it was an honor. Look,” He turns again and reaches out for the painting, only remembering a few inches from its surface to not touch it.  “This one has a lyre. You always paint us playing music. But music, art….these are human things, Dean.” He lets his hand fall, but keeps his eyes forward.  “We’re soldiers. They don’t teach us to play the harp in Heaven, they train us to fight. But these angels are…soft. Kind. Angels you trust to protect. The kind of angels people pray to, build churches to.” He looks back at Dean, who is staring at him with a frown. He holds his gaze, steady, and takes a deep breath before finishing. “I wish I was—that any of us were—worthy of being depicted this way. I wish we were the angels you paint us as.”

There’s a long pause while Dean searches his face, obviously trying to decide on the right reaction. If they were at home, Cas thinks Dean might reach out and hug him. Instead, Dean reaches out to clap a hand on his shoulder—he lets it linger there, and Cas knows what it means, so that’s okay, too. “For what it’s worth,” he starts, and his voice is softer than the last time he spoke. “You’re the closest thing to those angels that I’ve ever seen.”

It’s a nice sentiment, but Cas smiles sadly as he turns back to the painting. “I’m not any kind of angel anymore,” he points out, and tries his hardest to keep his voice neutral.

Dean squeezes his shoulder and tilts his head, trying to recapture Castiel’s gaze. “Hey. Look at me.” Reluctantly, he looks back over. “Your wings weren’t what made you a good angel, alright?” he brings his other hand up to poke into Castiel’s chest. “That was all in here.”

He sounds like he’s quoting the Wizard of Oz, and Cas wants to make a joke about that, but he’s also never wanted to kiss Dean more. He doesn’t, because they’re in a museum, and they’re still working up to that, but he makes a note to do it later. Instead, he reaches up and pulls Dean’s hand away from his chest, links it in his own, and squeezes.

“Thank you,” he says, and it’s earnest, and it’s for everything.

Dean smiles. He understands. He squeezes back.

[magickastiel]

✨ B&B’S CHRISTMAS ADVENT CALENDAR ✨

14th December - blanket

I am, once again, attempting to write one story through different prompts. I really enjoyed it last time so let’s see if I can do it through December!

check out the other days | now on ao3

Summary: Just a month after defeating Chuck, Sam & Dean are faced with their first real Christmas. Eileen, Jody, Donna, Claire & Kaia descend on the Bunker for a Christmas celebration like no other. But for Dean, Castiel’s confession still weighs heavy. It might be easier to deal with if Cas was actually around to talk to but he and Jack are busy in Heaven. Surely they don’t have time to come home for Christmas…do they?

🔭

They smuggle the gifts back into the Bunker with relative ease.

Dean has to shoo off Claire and Jack who are competing to make the funniest video for their respective TikTok accounts. Sam rolls his eyes when Dean asks what the hell TikTok is.

Sam scurries off to his room to hide Eileen’s necklace and, undoubtedly, go searching for Eileen herself.

Dean is wandering back to the kitchen, intent on carrying on with his cooking, when he hears soft voices coming from the library. Curious, he pokes his head around the corner and sees Cas and Kaia sitting on the steps beneath the telescope.

They’re still both in their pyjamas and, to Dean’s surprise, are both sharing a teal crochet blanket.

“- just wish I had more control.” Kaia says, brow furrowed. “I’ve been trying to train myself but it’s so hard. And I wake up even more tired than before I went to sleep.”

Dean turns away, not wanting to intrude, but Cas’ says,

“It’s ok, Dean. You can come in.”

He approaches cautiously, feeling too loud and clumsy to be around the two quietest people of the group.

Kaia offers him a small smile. “I was just telling Cas that my dreamwalking is…getting to be an issue again.”

“But we are not to tell Claire.” Cas says, very serious.

“She’ll get so caught up worrying about me she’ll forget to look after herself and that won’t do any of us any good.”

That does sound like Claire. And, he squirms discomfort, someone else. “I wonder what that's like, Dean.” Cas says to him, the smallest hint of a smile tugging at his lips.

Dean huffs and crosses his arms, choosing to ignore him. “You said it’s an issue again? Did it stop a while ago?”

“Yes.” But Kaia doesn’t look happy about it. “When Chuck destroyed all those other worlds it…my dreams all went dark. Like someone had turned off a light switch. And I started sleeping properly for the first time in…forever!” Her lip trembles. “But it felt all wrong. Like someone had sliced a part of my brain out.”

Dean winces. Cas hums, still listening and considering. Without looking, he picks up one end of the blanket and taps the ground beneath it.

Dean swallows.

There’s absolutely no way he’s getting under that blanket with Cas and his kid’s girlfriend to talk about their supernatural problems. Absolutely no way -

His feet are moving and before he realises what’s happened, his leg is pressing against Cas’ and he’s face to face with Kaia.

Right. Great. No need to freak out. Just…being supportive.

“And now,” Kaia trundles on, oblivious to Dean’s breakdown. “I can dreamwalk again but my body had gotten used to the sleep.”

“Our thinking is,” Cas explains, turning to Dean and almost giving him a heart attack with how close they are. “If Kaia can gain more control, she may be able to positively affect her surroundings. Perhaps even pick which world she sees.”

“Ri-right.” Dean wants to help, he really does. But Cas is so damn warm and he’s only just realising how cold he is. He’s been out in the cold too long and he hadn’t even known it. But now he knows and, god, he really wants to be warm. Under this blanket with Cas -

“Dean?” Oh, and Kaia. “What do you think?”

He clears his throat. “Uh, sure. Why not? I dunno, I’m probably not the person to ask.”

“You have nightmares.” Cas says very matter-of-factly.

“Well…yeah. Every hunter has nightmares.”

“Of course. But yours are worse than most.” Cas speaks with such surety Dean starts to wonder if he’s somehow seen them. “I…” Cas trails off, looking unusually uncomfortable.

“What?”

“I have, in the past…softened those nightmares with relative success.”

It feels like his breath leaves his body at once. “You…” He curls his fingers into the blanket, holding it higher up his chest like a child. “You what? You can’t just…how?”

“It’s a matter of calming the limbic system - the emotional section in the brain. If the limbic system is calmed, dreams often shift away from horror to mundane.” Cas still looks guilty as his eyes flit to him. “I…I haven’t done that in a long time. I know now that you would most likely consider that an unwelcome intrusion and I wouldn’t do it without your permission.”

“Right. Yeah.” Dean nods, conflicting emotions raging inside him. “Good.”

But is it good? Yeah, it’s weird to think of Cas messing with his brain but the fact that he cared enough to do it in the first place is crazy. With a sinking horror, he realises now why his nightmares were always far worse when Cas was away. He remembers barely sleeping when he lived with Lisa, when Cas lost his grace, when Cas had been stabbed through the heart.

“I am sorry, Dean.” Cas places a hand on Dean’s blanket covered knee and he suddenly feels hot all over.

“No worries, man.” Dean says, forcing a smile as he cringes at himself. “It’s all good.”

“Do you think that could help me?” Kaia asks, leaning forward a little and getting the conversation back on track.

“Perhaps.” Cas tilts his head again and exposes Dean to far more stubble and neck than he thinks is decent. “But I suspect it may be a case of strengthening your prefrontal cortex.”

“Her what now?”

“It’s the area of the brain that allows humans to make decisions and recall memories.” Cas sits forward too, giving Dean an obscene view of his dark ruffled hair and broad shoulders. Not that he’s looking. “It is thought that people with a stronger prefrontal cortex are much more likely to have lucid dreams.”

“You mean ones you can control?”

“Exactly. If I strengthen that area, it may allow you to walk your own path in the worlds you visit.”

Kaia looks excited. “Do it!”

Cas hesitates. “Are you sure? I would have to probe your brain with my grace. It will most likely be painful.”

She swallows but nods. “I’m sure.”

Cas nods in return and gently places both hands either side of her temple. He hesitates, glancing over his shoulder at Dean. But before Dean can say any word of encouragement, Kaia rests one of her small hands over his.

“It’s ok.” She stares into his eyes. “I trust you.”

Cas almost melts at her words but steels himself just in time. His eyes glow blue and Kaia gasps, body going rigid. Dean watches in fascination as Cas’ grace lights up every nerve on her face and bursts from her eyes. For one horrific moment, Dean worries Cas has accidentally smited her but then it’s all over and Kaia is gasping and leaning back heavily against the wall.

“Kaia? Kaia, are you alright? I’m sorry, I didn’t want to - ”

“It’s ok!” She waves away Cas’ fussing. “Really, it’s fine. Just a very weird feeling.” She gets her breath back and even smiles a little. “Well, I don’t feel any different so you can’t have done anything too awful.”

“That’s…not reassuring.”

She grins and slips out from under the blanket. “Even if it doesn’t work, thanks for trying, Cas. Seriously. It means a lot.”

“Of course. I hope it helps.” Cas holds up his end of the teal blanket. “Are you sure I can keep this?”

“Yeah.” She smiles warmly. “I got loads. When I can’t sleep, I crochet. Besides,” She looks between them. “It suits both of you.”

Dean feels the blood drain from his head like a game over screen.

“Oh.” Cas says quietly, holding the blanket tighter. “Thank you, Kaia.”

She wanders off, slipping around the corner and out of sight. Dean’s mind is still blank.

“Did she - does she think we’re…” He trails off, unable to finish. If he finishes that sentence then he might have to give an opinion on that sentence and he really can’t.

“I suspect she was teasing.” Cas says but he sounds on edge, like he’s ready to spring away at a moment’s notice.

“Yeah. Yeah, she probably was.”

There’s a heavy pause. Dean’s mind whirrs with images of running away and never coming back, of laughing it off and clapping Cas on the back. Of grabbing Cas’ face and planting a desperate kiss on those lips.

“Dean, we haven’t really had a chance to - ”

“Kitchen.” Dean half-shouts, standing up so quickly the blanket falls to the floor. “I gotta, uh, get to the kitchen.”

“Oh.” He tries to ignore the slightly hurt expression on Cas’ face. “Of course, Dean. You must have a lot to do.”

“Yeah!” Dean tries to push through the awkwardness with enthusiasm. “Got stuff to peel. Gotta make a tart for Sam! Forgot about that. Yeah, I’m making him a vegetarian tart. Don’t tell him though, it’s a surprise!”

Cas stands slowly, carefully draping the blanket over his arm. “I’m sure he will appreciate that.”

“Yeah.” Dean’s mouth is dry as he tries to mentally convince himself he’s not an asshole. “Yeah, I hope so ‘cause it’s taken a lot of work!”

“I’m sure.”

Cas looks at him, blue eyes like midnight in the dimming light. Dean knows he should be fleeing but he feels pinned, held in place by his own wonderment. It only gets worse when Cas reaches up and rests a hand on Dean’s left shoulder.

“You always do so much for everyone, Dean. You work so hard for all of us.” Cas squeezes his arm. “We are very grateful. But remember to make time for yourself too. And to ask for help if you need it.”

Dean’s tongue feels too big for his mouth and his heart feels too big for his chest. “Ok.”

With that, Cas drifts away, footsteps as soft as a feather on the breeze.

Dean stares after him and aches to follow.

Instead, Dean’s sensible feet take him back to the kitchen.

[castiel-left-his-mark-on-me]

Hi, Ary, very inactive ex-mutual(i think???) here. Good to see you thriving! ♥ It's been a while since I've dipped my head into cockles stuff. Could I perchance maybe ask uuuuum tf is going on??? lol I see Mish apparently confirmed he used to stay over at Jensen's in Van, and heard newbs were apparently freaking out about it and getting a bit messy, which I get that, business as usual. But I'm also seeing shit about spin-offs? And Jared getting in a twitter fight with Jensen, causing/resulting in stans to going feral and sending hate?? I know you're not as big a fan of Jar, but that's part of why I figured I'd ask you, you usually have a really level head about this kinda stuff. If you don't wanna answer publically, or at all, that's totally chill!

Hey, Rhi! We're still mutuals! Of course we're still mutuals! When I saw the notification of your ask, I was like "Hey! I haven't seen you in a while!" and my husband was like "???" and I said "Tumblr" and he said "Oh."

It was a wild time haha.

In any case, welcome back to the dumpster fire! We are obviously still a mess. So to catch you up, I guess I will start by summarizing both before and after the finale (not sure where you left off so this might be redundant for you) ... basically, it became obvious as the end of the show neared that Jensen was not on board with the plan for the finale; although Jared never stopped singing its praises.

We got confirmation of this during a zoom interview where Jensen said that he actually went into the writers room as well as called Kripke to basically voice how he didn't agree with the direction the final season was going, but he was shot down on all fronts. In another interview, he was asked "What would you tell your younger self going into this career?" And Jensen responded with: "I would tell myself to just keep your head down and do the work" meaning, "Don't try to change things because you can't." I also think that this whole situation is what he wrote "Let Me Be" about for his first Radio Company album, but that is just my own speculation. All of his reluctance, even though he always followed it up with "But I eventually saw the value in the script" or "I came around in the end" (which never sounded sincere, and I don't think he was really trying to sound sincere) made us all very nervous about what was to come for 15x20; and of course, when the last two episodes aired, we saw just how badly they fucked it up.

After the awful finale, the entire fandom became aware of the CW's heavy handed role in the thing, basically squeezing all the life out of SPN to shape it into a ramp from which Walker could launch itself. They not only erased all the love and joy and representation that Cas's love confession gave us, they also tore apart the things that made sense about the bond between Sam and Dean, making it really just about Sam-- and therefore Jared, which of course, Jared seemed to be fine with ... even though no one else was. Misha barely said anything during the finale, and a few of the other actors talked about the show ending in various posts, but Jared tweeted up a storm ... and Jensen? Jensen just sat in sexy-silent resentment of the whole thing. He didn't tweet, he didn't post, he didn't say a word once he no longer had to, and I think that's because he was already going full-steam-ahead on his plans for redemption.

Which brings us to Chaos Machine-- Jensen and Danneel's new production company that is being run by a queer creative director and has a mantra of inclusivity and representation woven throughout it's fabric; and apparently, the first story that Jensen wanted to tell through this new platform is the origin story of Sam and Dean's parents; so last week (?) he announced the upcoming production of "The Winchesters" -- the untold love story of John and Mary. Obviously, John is not the most likable character from the show, so the idea was met with a lot of resentment when it was first announced, but Jensen has gone on to say that he is excited to take on the task of telling the "true" story behind these characters-- the one that makes sense with the pre-established canon and doesn't reject it. So, given that, the idea is being mulled over with a bit more optimism from the fandom.

Who isn't being optimistic though?

Jared Padalecki.

When Jensen made this announcement on Twitter, many of his friends and coworkers congratulated him, but not Jared. Jared responded with a passive aggressive: "I'm happy for you, man, but I wish I didn't hear about it through Twitter." This of course, sent all the die-hard Jared fans into a tizzy and they immediately began asking him if he was serious (hoping it was just a joke-- we all hoped it was because there would be fallout no matter what one's opinion on Jared is). Instead of leaving it there though or just deleting that tweet, Jared went on to tweet some more, saying that he was being serious that he didn't know about the plans for the prequel, and that he was "gutted" that Sam apparenlty wouldn't be included (mind you, this a prequel to SPN... meaning BEFORE Sam and Dean were even born, so how could Sam be included? But Dean is apparently narrating this story so maybe Jared thought Sam should be helping to narrate it? I don't know). But Jared being Jared couldn't just leave that there, he then went on to tweet at Robbie Thompson who was announced as a writer for "The Winchesters" so then Jared went off on him too, calling him "Brutus" and a "coward" acting like Robbie betrayed him (speculation is-- Robbie refused to write for Walker, so Jared is pissed that he essentially chose Jensen over him). He did fairly quickly, remove that tweet attacking Robbie, but of course the damage was done at that point. And it truly only took his first tweet calling out Jensen for some people to be like "Jared-- that sucks if you didn't know but why are you saying any of this publicly?"

As you might know, Jared has had issues in the past with posting hurtful things on social media, and has even used it as a tool for attack before-- calling out customer service agents and public workers that he felt have wronged him, which is bad enough ... but for him to then do the same thing to his best friend of well over a decade? Many people who had once liked him or at least gave him the benefit of the doubt (I used to ...) stopped after this latest twitter tantrum.

However, some people have suspected for some time that J2 had a falling out either shortly before the finale or just after. Their public/social media interactions have seemed awkward, stilted or even non-existent in moments that they normally wouldn't be. In the past year, when Walker premiered, Jensen didn't say much about his friend's new venture other than a "Congrats. buddy" here and there. Later, we learned that Jensen refused to work on the show ... Jared said he make him do it, drag Jensen to the set "kicking and screaming" which made many fans quirk up an eyebrow because, why would Jensen put up a fight unless the two weren't as close as they used to be? And then Jensen moved his family to Colorado (either permanently or for an extended period at least) which is notable considering how he moved to Texas seemingly to be closer to Jared, even buying a house that was near his. All this was just speculation though; but it wasn't until Jared's tweet complaining about not knowing about the prequel that the theories behind them falling out, became less theory and more fact.

The day after his twitter tantrum, Jared tweeted again-- not retracting his statements or apologizing, but instead saying that he and Jensen "talked" and were "all good". Jensen then tweeted too, parroting this statement to some degree, which only made the whole thing even more sour in the mouths of the fans. The fact that Jared didn't apologize for his outburst and throwing his friend under the bus, and also the fact that Jensen-- Mr. Sexy Silence, Mr. Never Tweets, Mr. Tech-Ignorant-and-Proud, actually had to POST SOMETHING saying that he and Jared made up, it just screamed OPTICS. It was obviously the work of agents and PR firms and lots of people going "Look, if you two keep beefing, that will mean the death of both of your projects. Even more people will stop watching Walker, and this SPN prequel will never get picked up due to the scandal." So, the two "made nice" publicly to quell the chaos, but in my opinion, it's all too little too late. Jared started a storm that he can't contain now with a little tweet, and it seems like he knows that too because before he talked about him and Jensen making up, he asked that people "not send threats". He could have just as easily said that he shouldn't have made this a public issue and that he's sorry, but instead, he continued to play the victim and stoke the flames by alerting us all to the damage he's done.

Now, like I said before-- I used to give him the benefit of the doubt. I don't think he's an awful human or that he deserves to be attacked or anything, but he is an adult man with very poor judgment and an obvious selfish-streak a mile wide. He should know better, and he should have more respect for his so-called "friends" and "brothers" than to make them targets to public ridicule. I have a hard time believing that Jensen still sees Jared the way he used to, and I wouldn't blame him a bit for wanting to pull away-- especially when he's moving on to so many new and exciting things. Jared certainly deserves happiness just as much as anyone else, but he went on twitter and basically asked for a scandal, and he got one.

The question is now-- was there a motive behind it? Was just looking for a reason to bring his and Jensen's falling out to light-- while making himself looking like the victim in the process? Or did he genuinely not know about the prequel and just decided to go about "not knowing" in the most toxic and hurtful way he could manage?

In any case, that is the drama ... that is the J2 insanity in a rather lengthy nutshell ... that is the tea ... and I hope it all makes sense.

But the good news out of all of this is, Cockles is thriving-- they are happy and in love and Jensen calls Misha "Babe" and Misha misses waking up to see Jensen in the morning, and they are just as cute and wonderful as can be.

So, I will end that there. I am so glad to see you back, and I hope I answered all your questions in a way that made sense ... I tried anyway!

💖💖💖

[wormstacheangel]

reminder I am watching The Nanny and I can't help but write scenes as destiel. So here is my second one. I think this one is a bit more sitcom, especially towards the end :) This is for episode 1x11.

wc: 1.7k

The kids have been having a hard time with the one night they don’t have Dean to tuck them in. Whatever Cas did, the kids would correct him and tell him Dean did it this way or did it that way. He simply couldn’t get it right. Even Claire was missing Dean, showing her fear of losing the one person who finally got her to be less angry at the world.

After finally getting the kids to bed, Cas walks into the kitchen to find Balthazar lounging around in his robe with a drink in one hand and scrolling through movie reviews with the other. Cas stands over his shoulder, trying to read it, but his eyes gaze over, not caring enough but still, he sighs.

“Would you like a drink, sir?” Balthazar sounded exasperated with him already, even if he has only been in the room for less than a minute.

“Please.” Cas fetches a cup and holds it out for Balthazar to pour some whiskey into it. He has been feeling restless all night but can’t pinpoint the reason why. “You know, Mr. Winchester would have loved talking about horrible movies with you.”

“Yes. I know.”

“I wonder how he is.”

“I’m sure he is enjoying his date, sir.” Balthazar takes a sip of his drink as he keeps his eyes on the screen in front of him.

Cas walks over to stand by the kitchen island. He already undid his tie, undid his top four buttons, and he can’t imagine how his hair looked after pacing the living room for a good 20 minutes.

He swirled his drink before downing the whole thing in one gulp.

“Or he can be having a miserable time, sir. The man was a mortician, after all. I don’t think that would fit Mr. Winchester’s happy-go-lucky attitude very well.”

Cas perks up at that, feeling his chest warm-up — probably because of the drink actually— as he stands up straighter with a hopeful grin. “You think so?”

“Have I ever wronged you, sir?”

“You’re right, Balthazar! He would never like that-that depressing man.” Cas smile grows. “Cause you know, the kids, they would miss him very much if he left.”

Balthazar shuts his laptop as he rolls his eyes, “For god’s sake, sir! It’s only the first-!” He looks at Cas’s stunned expression before slowly falling back in his chair, a cheeky smile on his face. “I mean, with all due respect, sir.”

“Yes.” Cas sighs, ignoring the outburst. “I think you’re right. I’m getting ahead of myself, aren’t I?”

“Maybe a tad bit, sir.”

A chuckle came out of his mouth as Cas opens the trash can and plucks out the bag to throw it outside. He walks towards the back door as he says, “I didn’t see anything between them anyways. I’m sure it’ll be fine!”

Cas pulls the back door open only to find Dean and his date making out. Leaving Cas standing there stunned and fumbling, not knowing if he should break them apart or close the door.

“I don’t see anything between them either, sir.” Balthazar joked as they both watched Dean press closer to his date. Unaware of their audience. Balthazar was the one to finally close the door, taking the bag of trash away from Cas, as he leads him towards the stairs. “I believe it’s time for you to go to bed, Mr. Novak.”

“Yes. Yes. You’re probably right.” Cas shook his head, hoping to erase that image away like an etch a sketch, but he still saw Dean’s mouth being sucked on. “Goodnight.”

“Night, sir.”

(More Under The Cut)

In the morning, Cas somehow convinced himself—Balthazar was only half-listening to his words anyways— to talk to Dean about the rules of the house. It had to be done. He didn’t want Dean to bring home strange people to his home, where his children lived. He didn’t want to see—or better yet— he didn’t want his kids to see Dean bring people into his room.

What kind of example will that present to them? Not a very good one.

He knocks at the door and quickly gets an answer to come in; Dean never hesitates to have any of the kids in his room. Cas would usually find them all curled up in Dean’s bed watching cartoons on a Sunday morning.

“Good morning, Mr. Winchester.” Cas poked his head into the room first, and that enough stopped him short. Dean looked like he was getting ready to go out.

Dean is dressed in a comfortable-looking robe, no shirt, and he’s assuming no pants by the fact that he can see a peek of his thighs from the slit in the front.

“Morning, Mr. Novak. What can I do for you?” Dean turned back to the mirror, a small smile stretched across his lips as he continued to fix his hair.

“I just wanted to talk about your um—You know we have rules in this house, and I just wanted to make sure you know them.”

“Oh, I think you have me confused with Claire. She’s two doors down.” Dean teased.

“No. No, this is about your date. About you having dates. And-And having…dates.” Cas sighed the last word, unable to get the word he wants out without his whole body warming up. “Anyways,” He cleared his throat. “The rules of the house with me-”

“Oh, with you? Gosh, maybe I should have read the fine print better.” Dean teased, winking at him through his reflection as he ran his hands through his growing hair.

“No. Not like that!”

“Let me get this straight.” Dean turns to face Cas before practically strutting over to Cas, half-dressed in a semi-open robe. Cas eyes struggle not to travel on the man before him. “We are talking about having sex in my room.”

“Well, not-not us. Not we.” Cas nervous gestures between them, noticing his hand hit Dean’s bare chest in the process because they were standing so damn close.

“We already covered that.” Dean winks at him again, making Cas’s heart race. “Don’t worry, Mr. Novak, I won’t do anything to show a bad example for the children.”

“Good.” Cas stuffs his hands in his pockets as he rocks on his heels. “Yes. Good. Okay!”

“Okay.” Dean turns back to the mirror.

“Where are you going anyways?” That sounded way too demanding. “If I may ask?”

“Well, if you must know. I got another date. We’re meeting for lunch.”

“Again?”

“Yeah. Well, I gotta eat.”

“Of course. Well, have fun, Mr. Winchester.”

“Thank you, Mr. Novak. Nice chat.”

Cas makes his way out of the room, bumping on furniture as he went.

Cas walks into the kitchen that same afternoon to find Dean sitting on the kitchen counter, shoveling ice cream into his mouth. Cas quickly rushes over to take the spoon away from him.

“Mr. Winchester! You are lactose intolerant!”

“Well, I deserve a little bit of ice cream after the crap day I had, and the coconut milk one you got me is still frozen solid!”

“Oh,” Cas puts the ice cream away before walking back to him. “Date didn’t go so well this time? Was it the whole creepy mortician life?”

“No,” Dean sighs, watching as Cas runs the Dean-friendly fudge brownie ice cream under some hot water. “Weirdly enough, I was getting used to the idea.”

“Then, what was wrong with him?” Cas hands Dean a spoon, and they both dig into the still hard ice cream, but they can still scape a few bits off. Cas tried not to follow the way Dean’s tongue pokes out and licks at the spoon.

“He was a clown.” Dean sighs, spinning the spoon in his hand before aggressively digging at the pint of ice cream.

“In what way?”

“In a clown way.”

“What-?”

“Red nose! Big shoes! You want me to google it for you?” Cas looks stunned by the outburst. But it clicks; he means an actual fucken clown. He tried not to laugh as Dean let out a defeated sigh. “Sorry. I just thought…I just thought I finally found someone. You know? I’m 30. I should have found someone already.”

“I’m sorry, Dean. But I’m sure you will. You’ll find someone special who won’t honk their nose at you.” Cas bops Dean’s nose, it’s awkward, but Dean still chuckles when he pushes Cas’s hand away.

The atmosphere around them was warm and comforting, something he wishes to drown in. But in a respectable boss-and-employee-who-lives-with-him kind of way. The smile they share fades a little as they look away, and then Dean jumps off the counter with a yawn.

“I’m gonna head to bed now. Goodnight, Mr. Novak.”

“Goodnight, Mr. Winchester.”

And just like that, they are back to professionals.

The following day, Dean is in the room talking to Sam about his dating life.

“You just think the perfect person is gonna knock at your door yelling out ‘there you are! I found you!’”

“Oh, there you are.” Cas walks in, neither Sam nor Dean notices the coincidence, holding out two different ties. “What tie should I wear? Blue or yellow?”

“Blue. Goes great with your eyes.” Dean turns around to tie the tie nicely around Cas’s neck. Sam gave them no attention as it was an action that happens regularly.

When he was done, he fixes Cas’s collar and pats his shoulder before telling him he looks good.

“Thank you, Mr. Winchester.”

Cas walks out of the room while Dean continues to get ready as he talks. “I just want a person who actually respects and values my opinions, not just my pretty face.”

“Ah, sorry to bother you again, Mr. Winchester,” Cas walks back in. “but I do value your opinion. Should I wear the gold cufflinks or the silver?”

“Gold is a classic. But make sure it’s those nice ones Claire picked out for you. She’ll love to see them.”

“Oh, yes. Thank you! That would be great.” Cas walks out of the room with a grateful smile.

Sam is still flipping through Dean’s magazine collection as he sighs, “Yeah, Dean, that’s never going to happen. You should have just dated the damn clown,”

“And what? Never see you again cause you’ll be scared my boyfriend is in full makeup? No, thank you. Now let’s go before we’re late to the damn game.”

[loserchildhotpants]

Another destiel prompt from Twitter; say they’re dancing together, still trying to hide their feelings for each other, and because of that, avoiding eye-contract, the best the can, to ensure that the other character doesn’t notice how attracted they are to them (from this prompt list)

“Did you just turn her down?” Dean asks incredulously; Sam is busy sipping champagne next to him, but his eyebrows convey that he would also like clarification on whatever social interaction it is that Cas just had.

They’re all dressed to the nines, stuck at a posh wedding service until they solve this rogue Cupid case; it’s a low-risk case, but a case is a case, and they’ve got it well in hand.

Dean’s not been this dressed up since Bela stuffed him in a monkey suit, and he’d wager the same applies to Sam, but this is certainly the first either of them have ever seen Cas in anything other than his cubicle-life uniform.

Cas’ suit is sharp, pressed, striking, and he’s wearing a cerulean blue tie that has everyone meeting eyes with him coming up short. Predictably, he doesn’t know what to do with the attention, so he mostly apologizes awkwardly for those he seems to startle and thanks the handsy old ladies that liken him to long dead husbands.

With two flutes of bubbly meant for Dean and himself, Cas crossed the great hall, seemed to be stopped by a gorgeous young woman with dark hair, in a low-cut dress and a very promising smirk, but whatever exchange happened left her dejected.

“She asked me to dance,” Castiel tells Dean, passing him his flute, “I regretfully informed her that I don’t know how.”

“You can’t manage a simple little box-step for that hot piece? She was practically drooling, lookin’ at you!”

“We’re on a case,” he says, as though it’s a valid excuse.

“Nuh-unh,” Dean answers, shaking his head and putting his drink down on a nearby table, “That’s - that was a travesty, what I just witnessed. Babes are fuckin’ wasted on you, Cas.”

“She’s a fully grown woman, Dean,” Castiel corrects him, eyebrows scrunched in confusion as he brings his glass to his lips, “Besides, I’d only be wasting her time. I cannot dance, and I’d not be amenable to having relations with her, so it’s better I -”

“Not amenable?” Dean chokes out disbelievingly, “Who the fuck are you holdin’ out for?! Angelina Jolie?”

“I don’t know who that is.”

“It’s a shame you don’t know how to dance, though,” Sam interjects, seeing by the vein throbbing in his forehead that Dean is about to start shouting about beautiful women and Cas’ ineptitudes, “I could teach you, if you want.”

Castiel slants his mouth at Sam, and Sam smiles gently back at him, “I know it doesn’t sound like fun, but, honestly? It’s a good skill to have, and worst case scenario is that you brighten someone’s evening.”

Appealing to his kind nature is the right call; Cas can’t argue that point, so he puts his champagne down and walks up to Sam.

“Very well. Where do we begin?”

“Oh - we’ll probably wanna go somewhere more private, so we can move a little more freely.”

At Sam’s behest, Dean and Cas follow him across the great hall, out onto a spacious balcony, out of the way of most everyone. Double glass doors lead out to it, and flowers line stone railing; no moon is visible from where they are in the mansion, but the sky is bright with stars, and that’s light enough.

While Sam does a fine job of teaching Castiel, and Castiel is a very quick study, they struggle with their height difference while Dean tells them about their height difference, unhelpfully and repeatedly.

Eventually, Sam turns to Dean, and says, “you should step in, man.”

“What? I’m not short,” Dean pouts grumpily.

“No, but you’re at least shorter than me - it’ll make leading a little easier for him.”

Rolling his eyes as though he’s actually put out, Dean peels himself from the French window he’d been leaning on, and takes Sam’s place.

Even and paced, Castiel and Dean take a few turns around the balcony, and Sam is impressed, informing Castiel that it took him a full week of practice to stop tripping over his own feet.

“To be fair, you were still growing into them at the time” Dean jokes.

In a rare moment of familial levity between them, Sam laughs, and Dean smiles at him - all of that makes Cas smile too, and then Sam’s phone rings.

“Oh - it’s Natalie,” Sam lets them know, “She wants eyes on the dance floor for a minute - I’ll take care of it - Cas, you’re doing great, don’t stop practicing!”

To both Dean and Cas’ surprise and humor, Sam appears genuinely bereft to leave the lesson. They both seem inclined to respect Sam’s wishes, though, so they take another turn.

“You gotta stop glancing down,” Dean commands.

Flashing his eyes back up at Dean, Cas mutters, “it’s reflexive. I apologize.”

“Nah, it’s fine, man. You’ve got it,” Dean assures him, “Now that you know how to, you gonna ask that girl to dance?”

“Perhaps,” Cas tries to shrug, determinedly keeping his eyes up, “I feel certain she has moved on in her pursuits, but if I pass her again, I will offer a dance.”

“You know how?”

“Now, yes.”

“No, I mean do you know how to ask a girl to dance?”

“Is there a particular ritual involved?”

Exhaling a laugh, Dean brings them to a stop, and explains, “okay - I’m gonna show you how it’s done, alright? Then I’ll lead.”

“Understood,” Cas tells him with serious conviction, studious and militant.

Dean steps back and away, and they wait for the band’s dreamy rendition of The Way You Look Tonight to end before proceeding.

As The Book of Love begins, the live orchestra swells from inside the hall, Dean bows just a little at the waist, with his right arm crossing his chest, but his head up, and he inquires politely, “Castiel, may I have this dance?”

Tilting his head curiously, Castiel needlessly replies, “yes, Dean, of course.”

Smiling his most winning smile, Dean straightens up, offers his hand, and nods approvingly when Castiel all but glides into step with him.

He keeps the tempo slow, but incorporates making circles, turning them ‘round and ‘round the stone and marble balcony, up and down it’s length; Cas follows him easily, trusting Dean’s direction, and always operating on a similar wavelength - Dean thinks that maybe they dance together well because they fight together well.

“This is nice, Dean,” Castiel remarks softly.

A dusting of rosiness rises up in Dean’s face; he pulls Cas a little closer to better obscure his face from scrutiny, clears his throat and makes some noncommittal noise that could be agreement or indifference.

“You’re the one who taught Sam to waltz,” Castiel surmises conversationally.

“Yeah,” Dean answers.

“How is it that you came to learn it?”

“Eh, you’d be surprised what you learn on the job,” Dean replies easily, pulling away enough to spin Cas, and then move close in again.

“... you just spun me.”

“Yeah, I was there,” Dean jokes, smirking proudly down at Cas; “Don’t worry, when you get to be a seasoned pro like me, you can snazzy up your waltz too. Maybe next you can learn to salsa or tango.”

In a moment of silence between them, Dean follows Cas’ eyes to their clasped hands; Dean’s not sure what Cas is seeing, but whatever it is, it’s making Dean nervous.

“See now what that lovely lady wanted? Feel bad yet?” Dean prompts.

Castiel’s electric eyes refocus on him, startling him with their intensity just as they had the wedding guests that were strangers to Cas, “I do understand now. However, perhaps it’s the soldier in me, but I find I much prefer following than leading.”

“Ah, that’s just ‘cause I’m a great lead,” Dean teases playfully.

“Yes, you are,” Castiel reinforces, eyes flickering between Dean’s, “You do know I would follow your lead anywhere, don’t you?”

“Christ, Cas,” Dean swears, trying to politely move his too-warm face out of view.

“Really, Dean,” Castiel adds, squeezing Dean’s hand where they’re clasped; when that doesn’t work immediately, he takes advantage of a circling turn to near their faces - their noses almost bump, and Dean has no choice but to look into Castiel’s eyes, “I want you to know. You do know, don’t you?”

Swallowing roughly, feeling possibly feverish, Dean down, then away, “... you gotta stop saying shit like that, Cas.”

“Why?” he wonders, “It’s only the truth.”

Clearing his throat again - a nervous tic he didn’t realize he had until right then - he mumbles back, “yeah, well… I talk big, but I’m flyin’ blind, so maybe don’t follow me everywhere.”

“I’m a soldier, Dean. A Commander, actually. When I delivered you to the convent where Sam and Ruby were against the wishes of Heaven, I chose you. I pledged my allegiance to an Earthly King over an absent God, and I knew what I was doing when I did,” their steps slow down as Dean takes that in, “All I knew was that… I had faith in you.”

At that, Dean stops moving altogether, his hand slides down from Cas’ shoulder blade to the cinch of his waist, and he allows their joined hands to wilt a bit lower, but he doesn’t let go.

It seems then that Cas is the one having trouble keeping Dean’s gaze.

He looks to some faraway place over Dean’s shoulder, and rasps, “I still do. So, yes, Dean. I will follow you everywhere you lead, for however long you allow me to. I don’t mind flying blind if I’m flying with you.”

“Cas…”

With difficulty, Castiel looks back into Dean’s eyes, and Dean feels his heart thud in his ears. He wonders to himself if Cas can hear it, or feel it, but all Cas does is stare intently back at him, maybe waiting for Dean to confirm or deny something.

“Guys!”

Dean practically jumps away from Cas, frightened as if he’s been caught doing something untoward, but Cas is unbothered.

“I think I found our guy,” Sam announces, none the wiser, “And I think he brought a friend.”

“Yeah,” Dean affirms gruffly, “Got it.”

Sam turns back around first, through the glass doors, back into the busy hall, and Dean starts after him, a hand already twitching toward his holster, sparing Cas a look from over his shoulder.

The Angel is standing there alone, unmistakably ethereal with a backdrop of twinkling stars and lazy fireflies illuminating him; he’s examining his hand as though Dean may have left a mark or a message on him somehow.

“You comin’, Swayze?”

Cas’ eyes snap to attention again, and his forehead wrinkles, “... I don’t understand that reference,” but he follows after Dean anyway.

He doesn’t seem to notice how Dean clenches and unclenches his corresponding hand, but Dean wouldn’t be able to explain it if he did.

[thesleepy1]

Written Before I Knew

A/N: I got a request for a Jack Kline x Winchester sister fic. This is one of my first requests besides the ones from friends or mutual so I hope I do it justice. Also sorry that this was so late. I had a lot going on and I wanted to actually try and not rush this. Unbeta’d as always. I’m so, so, so sorry. This was written before I learned of what happened between Destiel. I wish you all the best of luck. I’m sorry. @head-over-heart

 “Could do something with the reader being Sam and Dean's little sister, and Jack is always trying to do things to please her, and make her proud of him, so Dean is jealous of his big brother.”

 Pairings: Jack Kline x Reader, Jack Kline x Winchester reader 

 Summary: Jack tries his best to please you, Dean takes notice. 

 Word count: 790 

 Warnings: None that I know of besides the fact that we are all aware of.

 When you go hunting with the boys no one believes that you’re their sister. They always think you’re Sam and Dean’s daughter, or wife, or girlfriend, or something completely wrong. The wife thing was far too common an occurrence for your liking. 

 So after a certain point you couldn’t help but get used to it. At times you even played into it, posing as Sam and Dean’s little girl who they just couldn’t leave at home. It was fun even, teasingly calling your older brothers Dad and Papa. And everyone you’ve ever worked with bought it from the beginning. And you were okay with that until Jack entered your life.

 The two of you just clinked from the start. Dean would jokingly call you childish all the time and though it hurts being around Jack made you feel normal. He is so new to the world and is still learning. You just can’t help it but want to join him along the way.

 “Like this?” Jack held up his work of crochet, a half finished jellyfish head. 

 “Yeah, you’re a natural at this,” you praised, looking over his handiwork. He really was talented. “Do you want to use another color?” you added, grinning as his cheerful nod.

 “What are you two doing?” Dean poked his head into your corner of the library that you and Jack turned into a pillow fort. There were string lights hung up and cushions thrown all around the place. Blankets and sheets were taken from your respective bedrooms and were used as well. 

 “Nothing.”

 “Making friends.”

 “Making friends?” You silently curse out the golden retriever that is your friend, hoping to convey all of that through a single glare. 

 “Well, not really but-”

 “Look what I made!” Jack held up his jellyfish head for Dean to see. The older man raised his eyebrows, pursing his lips, and looking like the confused older brother that he was. 

 “That just looked like a butch of yarn.” 

 There was also that time in the kitchen. The Bunker had just been attacked and everyone was just trying to calm down. Live in the few moments of peace that you were allowed and everything. So you decided to make everyone pancakes. Jack for whatever reason was also up at the ungodly hour and wanted to help. 

 Making pancakes is not as easy as it sounds.

 “What’s going on?!” Dean coughed, waving away the smoke as he stumbled into the kitchen.

 “We’re making pancakes,” Jack replied, waving his spatchal over the only salvageable pancake. It was a little too dark and burnt at the edges. But some people linked crispy pancakes, at least that's what you were telling yourself.

 “No, you’re starting a fire.” Dean pointed to the flame that had caught your apron. 

 “Argh!” you begin screaming, throwing the arpon off of yourself and onto the ground. Before the whole Bunker could be set on fire Dean puts out the flame with the fire extinguisher. 

 “You okay?” Dean asked, waving through the smoke. 

 “Y-yeah,” you stumbled, suddenly realizing where you were. Jack’s arms were around you putting his body in front of yours. You were the same height but it didn’t matter as you stared at his beautiful eyes. They were slightly teary from the smoke but they just looked stunning.

 “Are you going to make out or clean up?” 

 “What’s make out?”

 “C-clean up, of course,” you rushed, running to the storage closet to get the broom.

 And that wasn’t even taking into account of the rain day.

 “I think that piece goes there,” you motion towards the section of the puzzle with the same color and texture. 

 “Oh you’re right,” Jack smirks, putting the piece into place. You were staring at his charming smile and he just so happened to look up at the same time. Getting caught off guard was one thing but getting caught off guard by that face was game over. You were swooning before you even realized it.

 “Alright alright, six feet apart. I don’t want to deal with any grandkids,” came Dean’s gravelly voice.

 “Dean!” you shouted, embarrassed out of your mind and trying to hide your face within your arms. 

 “What does he mean-”

“I mean unless you plan on marrying my sister, stay away from her,” Dean explained threateningly.

 “Why?” Jack tilted his head like a puppy.

 “Because I want her attention too, and with you around I barely get the time of day from her. Can you imagine how much she would talk to me with a little kid running around? Actually don’t.” 

 “Little kid?”

 “Argh! Dean, go flirt with Cas or something,” you begin the dull process of shoving your brother out the door. “Leave us alone.” 

 “Cas doesn-”

[achillestiel]

the parent trap only works if you’re identical | part two

based on this post by @destiel-is-canon-i-guess which now lives rent free in my brain | Part One 

Dean looked out across the sea of faces for the familiar sight of Claire. After four weeks he had to admit that he’d missed her like crazy. All he wanted to do was get back home and hear all about her summer over some burgers. 

“Hey Dad!” A kid around Claire’s age called out as he raced over to Dean. Dean looked over his shoulder, guessing that there was another parent near him. No. Just Dean. He looked back as the kid stopped at his feet. 

“Think you got me confused for someone else kid. I’m looking for Claire Winchester, you seen her?”

“Dad, it’s obviously me. Claire.” The kid said with a grin. Dean loved kids, especially his own, but sometimes they were freaking annoying. 

"Kid, I've been driving since yesterday morning and I'm pretty beat. Can you grab Claire for me?"

"That might be difficult...she's not here." The kid said as he chewed on his bottom lip. Dean just closed his eyes and let out a long sigh because of course, this wasn't going to be easy when his damn kid was involved.

"That girl, I swear. Send to camp for the summer Dean, she won't get into trouble in Maine Dean. Last time I listen to Sam. Ok kid, where's Claire? Is this gonna be a job for her dad, the sheriff or the FBI?" Dean asked and for what felt like the millionth time he wished that parenting, especially parenting Claire, was easy. 

"That depends...she’s on a train...to meet her dad so I could meet mine..." The kid said, once again worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. For a second Dean was transported to fifteen years before, watching another person bite on his bottom lip as he did the Sunday crossword.  

"She what?" Dean asked and that was finally when Dean looked at the kid. Really looked at him. “Wait...Jack? Jack, is that you?” Dean asked looking down at the kid. The kid’s face broke out into a nervous looking smile. “Oh, holy shit.” Dean gasped out because of all the people he was expecting to see today, Jack was not one of them.

“Hi Dad.” Jack said as Dean pulled him into a fierce hug. “Ok, this is nice.” Jack said into Dean's chest as he hugged Dean back tightly. 

“Damn kid you grew up." Dean said with a laugh. The last time he'd seen Jack, the kid had only been six months old. Now here he was in the flesh looking every inch the miniature Cas clone. "How...what...ok, start from the very beginning. How did any of this happen?" 

"Well, Claire started it."

"She normally does." Dean said with a roll of his eyes. “Ok kid, get the car. I got a call to make.” he added with a sigh. This was going to be...interesting to say the least.

Cas Novak bobbed on the spot as he looked out for Jack. The train station was packed with people and none of them so far has been Jack. Cas looked over the train schedule to make sure that Jack’s train had definitely come in. He looked around once again and nearly jumped a mile when a blonde teenage girl strolled right up to him, grinning from ear to ear. 

“Sup, it’s your boy Jack” the blonde girl said, grinning at Cas like he hung the moon. Cas stared back at her in confusion as his phone began to ring. He pulled it out of his pocket and just stared at the name on the screen. Why on earth was Dean of all people calling him? 

“Hello? Dean, is that you?” Cas asked. The blonde girl groaned and hid her face in her hand. “This is odd, why exactly are you calling me?”

“Hey there Cas. Long time. So listen, our kids are freaking morons.” Dean said over the phone. Cas tried to ignore how much his stomach flipped at the sound of Dean's voice. He was staggered to find that after all these years Dean still had an effect on him. "Um yeah kiddo, you're a moron. Did you two geniuses think this was actually gonna work?" Dean said to someone. 

“Our kids? Dean, is Jack with you?” Cas asked looking back at the blonde girl.  

“Yep, the kid is sat in the car right next to me.” Dean said. “And he won’t stop bugging me to change the channel. At least Claire had some respect for Led Zeppelin.” 

“Wait, so that would make the blonde girl standing next to me...”

“Goddamn, that kid is going to be the death of me. Put Claire on the phone.”

“This is Claire?” Cas asked as he stared at the blonde girl. "You're Claire?" He asked the girl. She nodded her head, suddenly looking nervous and Cas’ heart just gave out completely. He’d last seen his daughter when she was barely six months old and now here she was. All grown up in beat up boots and a flannel shirt that looked like it was really Dean’s. "Oh my god." Cas said, pulling Claire in for a tight hug. 

"Not that this isn’t nice but...dude, you're kinda crushing me." Claire said. 

"I'm sorry." Cas said as he pulled away and just stared. Long gone was the tiny blonde baby, and now here was a teenage girl who seemed to be oozing in Winchester confidence. From the way she stood to the amused look on her face, Cas could see every ounce of Dean Winchester influence. 

"Hey Cas, once you're done with the hugging, put Tweedledum on the phone." Dean said loudly over the phone. Cas sighed and switched his phone over to loudspeaker. 

"Claire is here Dean, she can hear you." 

“Hey, Lindsey Lohan. You know The Parent Trap only works if you’re identical twins...and maybe of the same gender?” Dean said over the loudspeaker. 

"Yeah and the parents in that film sucked so why did you two do the exact same thing huh?" Claire shot back and God, did she remind Cas of Gabriel at that moment. “You call me and Jack morons but-”

"Claire Mary Winchester don’t think about finishing that sentence. You get your annoying butt back home to Kansas before I ground you-"

"Hey dad, am I on speaker?" Claire said, interrupting what Cas knew was going to be one of Dean’s long speeches. 

"You're not on speaker...no, Jack I'm not putting your sister...kid, don’t give me the eyes...stop it, you look way too much like your dad when you do that...ok fine...yes, you're on speakerphone."

"Hi Jack! I don't think our plan worked." Claire said with a shrug. 

"Yeah, me neither. Hi dad!" Jack called out to Cas. Cas let out yet another long sigh and shook his head. 

"Hello Jack. You're grounded." 

"Dang it." Jack said. 

"Claire enough messing around, where are you?" Dean said, sounding more and more exasperated. 

"At a train station with my dad." Claire shot back, still grinning. "And I'm not coming back. You're just gonna have to come and get me."

"Goddamn kid, I swear she gets this stubbornness from you Cas.” Dean said. What surprised Cas the most was that despite how exasperated Dean sounded there was still some affection in his tone “Whereabouts are you guys? I'll bring Tweedledee back to you and drag Tweedledum back to Kansas with me."

"We're in Washington DC, I'll send my you address and we can sort this all out." Cas said.  

"Great. Jack, do up your seat belt and stop trying to change the station. Claire...just don't do anything stupid."

"Scouts honour Dad. Bye!" Claire said, leaning over to end the call. Once she’d hung up she turned to Cas with a giant grin on her face. "So...what now dad?”

Tag List (If you wanna be tagged in parts just lemme know):

@littlerachelbee @imthedoctorlove

[amwritingmeta]

15x20 and human!Cas...

I’m losing my mind a little over the fact that Jensen talked about how Cas’ celestial heritage stood in the way of Dean actually internalising that ‘I love you’ in the moment, and I’m losing my mind a little because Cas’ celestial heritage has always been hinted at acting as a soft obstacle to how these two relate themselves to one another: for Cas in his learning to not fear his emotions and to dare to feel things fully, and for Dean in his absolute belief in his unworthiness of love making him feel crazy for even thinking, let alone ever daring to hope, that Cas might ever feel anything like that for him.

So for Jensen to even mention it... *head exploding*

Guess when in the narrative this obstacle wasn’t present? Actually, it felt like it was glaringly non-present. 

Yeah, during the human!Cas arc. When Dean was already beginning to quietly enjoy Cas talking about the shower pressure and about having had sex (I mean, I cannot see that offered revelation as anything but provocative on Cas’ part) and Cas wanting a burrito, only for the cock-blocker that is Gadreel to, out of pure narrative necessity, to immediately demand Cas get asked to leave the bunker. 

And Dean’s face... “The bunker is safe!!!” But nope. Dean’s left no choice.

And so Cas goes.

And then Dean goes to see “Steve” at that Gas-n-Sip and Dean is apologetic, of course, and trying to make sure that Cas will forgive him for asking him to leave, but he’s also eager to get Cas back on a case, to work together, to remind Cas of who he truly is. And he does. Cas tells him that he’s scared of dying, still grappling with what his humanity and mortality means, and Dean understands -- why wouldn’t Cas want out of the life? -- and Dean respects Cas enough to not push or continue to cajole Cas into where Dean wants Cas to be: still in the life so he can still be in Dean’s life. But the interaction serves it’s purpose. “Steve” is nothing but an armour of pretence, because being human doesn’t necessitate giving up protecting innocent life -- only Cas’ fear of dying necessitated that, and Cas sheds the pretence, and goes to join the brothers on a case, using the fact that it’s to do with the fallen angels as a very sound excuse for him to be “back in town”.

And we get the most openly flirtatious moment ever between these two in that bar, at that table, with the beer and the “every hookup can’t be perfect” and there’s this gentle moving into something different for them, only then we get Cas learning that Sam needs help, and there seems to be a war coming, and Cas decided that he can only be useful to the fight, he can only be helpful if he’s powered up, so he swallow’s Theo’s grace.

And we get one of the most tense phone conversations between Dean and Cas ever. Dean looks so shocked that Cas is an angel again. Is Cas sure this is what he wants?? And Cas is. If there’s a war coming, he has to be ready.

And so that gentle moving into something different for them grinds to a halt, because Cas not being human again slams all of the walls back down. Dean just cannot believe that Cas won’t just break apart of he tries to care, he cannot see Cas Angel of the Lord and Warrior of Heaven as a being that would ever fall in love, not in the same way a human would. 

That’s not to say that this is the truth.

We now know that it isn’t the truth at all. 

What I’m getting it as that I’m curious what we’re getting in 15x20 because if Castiel is dead (long live Castiel), then what we’re getting back might be something different. Of course, he’ll be something just the same because the humanisation of Cas culminated in that “I love you”, but you know what I mean. 

If we get Cas back human, then this might actually mean that Dean has to readjust again... Because what was the “love” that Castiel talked about? Will Cas as a human still be feeling it? How does it work? 

I’d most likely fall apart completely if we get Dean being happy, so damn happy, to have Cas back and yet so damn self-conscious and not necessarily insecure, but nervous. Like Dean’s trying to suss out where they stand etc. and exactly how he can broach the subject or try to hint to Cas that hey, he’s felt the same way for the longest time, but he never even dared hope that Cas would ever love him. And Dean is all: he said he loves me, but that was before, and this is now, so does he still...?

Anyway. Hopes and wishes. I just love the human!Cas arc so damn much and to have them interact that way again would be ambrosia for the brain. 

*is it thursday yet?*

I almost hope we get Cas just showing up. The way he’s just shown up all the other times Dean has had faith he would. You know? 5x01 is perhaps the exception, but then again, it was all so new then. 13x04 was the first time we were brought in to witness Cas’ return, because it was important for his arc. His arc is complete -- apart from the reward -- so it would be kind of funny of Cas calls again or just knocks on the door of the bunker and is like... I’m back. 

And then it’s revealed that he’s back because Dean fucking prayed, every night Dean’s prayed, and it woke Cas in the Empty and he did his thing and got himself back... *muahahhaha I wish and hope*

[soupyboysforlife]

Suits/Rainbows

Day 2/3 of Ink/Suptober

Dean pulled at the itchy fabric, mumbling under his breath about hating the feeling. His face gave him away. A smile pulled at his mouth and his eyes shone with excitement. “Dean, it’s not even for one day. Cut the crap,” Sammy said, adjusting his tie, “It’s your wedding day.”

“You’re right, no more whining. Today is going to be great,” he said, taking a nervous breath.

“It will be,” Sam reassured him, patting him on the shoulder. He brought his wrist up, checking the time on his watch, “Cas should be here soon. Are you gonna see each other before it starts?”

“Isn’t that bad luck or something?” Dean asked, “Or is that just for a bride?”

“Huh, I didn’t think about it like that.”

Just then, the door opened. Charlie peeked her head in, “He’s here,” she said, her face lighting up when she saw Dean and Sam, “Awe, you two look amazing!” Dean flushed at the praise. He looked at himself in the mirror. Despite how uncomfortable the suit was, it fit him perfectly. “Oh, I have something for you,” Charlie said, stepping into the room. She shut the door behind her, Something was clutched in her hand. Once she was in the room she held it up. Dean laughed when he saw the tiny bisexual pride flag in her hands. The silky material shone in the light. “It’s a pocket square, for your suit. I gave one to Cas too,” She smiled, handing it to Dean.

Dean accepted it gratefully. Something on the corner of the cloth caught his eye. His breath hitched when he saw the letters embroidered into it. ‘CW’ and ‘DW’ intertwined in swirly gold lettering. He traced his fingers over them as tears started to well up in his eyes. This was happening. Really happening.

“Dean? You okay?” Sam asked, looking at him worried.

“Yeah,” Dean answered, hoping his voice sounded steady. He reached up, whipping away some of the tears that had spilled over. “Yeah,” he said again more confidently, “Thanks, Charlie. I love it.” He pulled her into a tight hug.

“Anything for you guys, you helped me so much, it's the least I could do,” she said into his shoulder. “I’d better change,” she pulled out of the hug. “Your groom awaits you,” she said with a bow before heading out the door.

Dean watched her go, turning back to the mirror once the door shut. He folded the napkin up and put it in his pocket, making sure every color was visible. It added a nice contrast to the black suit and tie. He smiled at the reflection. “I’m ready,” he said, adjusting the tie one more time before looking over towards Sam.

Sam smiled at him, “Let’s go.”

Dean followed him out into the hall. Cas was at the end of it, talking to Charlie. She looked over at them when they walked out. She tapped Cas’s shoulder, cuing him to turn. His smile softened when he met Dean’s eyes. He was wearing a white suit and tie with a black shirt, the inverse of Dean. A rainbow-striped pocket square poked out of his pocket. Charlie probably gave it to him.

“Hi,” he murmured once Dean made his way down the hall.

“Hi,” Dean said back.

“You look,” Cas started, gesturing with his hands when he couldn’t think of a word.

“You too,” Dean smiled, not bothering to finish the sentence. He pulled Cas into a gentle kiss, not able to wait any longer.

“Wait,” Cas said, pulling back, “Isn’t this bad luck?”

“We decided that only applies to brides. Neither of us are brides so I’m pretty sure we’ll be okay,” Dean reasoned. Cas shrugged, leaning back into the kiss.

Sam cleared his throat. Dean pulled out of the kiss, shooting him an annoyed look. He tapped his watch in response. Dean rolled his eyes, pecking Cas on the lips once more. “You look amazing, by the way,” he said, turning to Charlie.

“Yes,” Cas agreed.

“Thank you,” she smiled, smoothing down the jacket of her suit.

Bobby greeted them when they went outside. The courtyard was decked out. A large arch stood at one end. White flowers hung off of it in intervals. Rows of white, fold-up chairs surrounded the aisle leading up to it, connected by a rainbow lace rope. String lights were hung from poles staggered around the yard.

“It’s beautiful, Bobby,” Charlie breathed, admiring the scene.

“It is,” Dean agreed, smiling at him, “Thank you.”

“It was nothing,” Bobby smiled back.

“And thank you for agreeing to officiate, too,” Cas cut in.

“Someone needed to do it,” Bobby said.

“We should go back inside,” Dean said, “everyone will be here soon.”

“Yes, we should,” Cas agreed, his arm wrapped around Dean’s waist.

They watched as guests started filling in the seats. Time seemed to be moving too fast and yet all too slow as the seconds ticked closer to the wedding. Jack had shown up a few minutes after they had headed inside again. Dean paced the room.

“It’ll be okay,” Cas comforted, walking over to where Dean had stopped to peek out the window again. He hugged Dean from the back, his chin resting on his shoulder. Dean leaned back a little into Cas at the touch. Their cheeks pressed together.

“I know,” he hummed. He watched Sam lead Ellen, Jo, and Ash to their seats.

“Dean, look at me,” Cas said, pulling his head off Dean’s shoulder. Dean turned in his arms, “I love you. No matter what. If you don’t want this-”

“I do,” Dean interrupted.

“Okay, but if you don’t. We’ll call it off,” Cas said.

Dean knew he was trying to comfort him but his stomach sank, “Do you?” he asked, hurt creeping into his voice.

“Of course,” Cas said. Dean searched his eyes for any sign of doubt. He sighed, feeling better when he found none. “Let’s save the ‘I Do’s’ for the altar though,” he said, making Dean chuckle. He leaned up, planting a kiss on Cas’s forehead.

“It’s almost time,” Sam said, leading Charlie in through the door. Dean pulled out of Cas’s arms, meeting Sam at the door. “Are you ready?” he asked.

“As I’ll ever be,” he muttered back nervously.

“Let’s do this thing, bitches,” Charlie exclaimed.

Jack stood in front of the door, holding a small pillow with two rings on it. Sam and Dean took their place behind him, followed by Charlie and Cas. They listened closely as the muffled noise outside the door grew quiet. It was soon replaced by the sound of an orchestra playing an instrumental version of Turning Page by Sleeping At Last.

Jack opened the door at the cue, starting the procession out. Sam offered his arm. Dean took it, taking one final deep breath before stepping forward. “You’re gonna do great,” Sam reassured him, “You got your vows?”

“Yeah,” Dean said, his eyes flicked over the familiar faces smiling at him, fixing on the arch in front of him. Bobby stood there, dressed in a black suit. A bowtie was strung around his neck. If Dean wasn’t so nervous, he would have laughed.

Sam pulled him into a tight hug when they reached the front. “Good luck, Jerk,” He whispered to Dean.

“Bitch,” Dean chuckled back. They separated, going to their places. Dean situated himself to the right of where Bobby was standing, turning towards the door he’d just come out of. On cue, Cas and Charlie stepped out of the doorway. Heads turned and green eyes met blue as the pair strolled slowly down the aisle. They mirrored Sam and Dean when they reached the front. Cas came to stand to the left of Bobby in front of Dean.

“Hi again,” Dean whispered.

“Hi again,” Cas copied.

The music came to a stop and Bobby started talking. Dean barely registered what he was saying, focused on the man in front of him. His soon-to-be husband.

“You all know me, and if you don’t the name’s Bobby, and I have the privilege of performing the ceremony today. First off I’d like to welcome and thank you on behalf of Dean and Castiel for sharing this special day with them. By attending you celebrate with them the love they have discovered in each other and you support their decision to commit themselves to one another for the rest of their lives. Today we celebrate love. We come together to witness and proclaim the joining together of these two persons in marriage. This is the union of two individuals in heart, body, mind, and spirit, Therefore, marriage is not to be entered into lightly, but reverently, honestly, and deliberately. And it is into this union that Dean and Castiel come now to be joined.

Dean, you were more of a Son to me than anything I could have hoped for. I’m glad that you trust me enough to do this for you. Seeing you happy and in love is everything I could have wished for and more. I’m proud of you, son. Now I will admit I am a sentimental old fool so let’s get this started before I start crying,” the crowd chuckled.

“Dean, you have chosen Castiel to be your life partner. Will you love and respect him? Will you be honest with him always? Will you stand by him through whatever may come?” Bobby asked.

“I will,” Dean answered, smiling softly at Cas.

“And you Castiel, you have chosen Dean to be your life partner. Will you love and respect him? Will you be honest with him always? Will you stand by him through whatever may come?” Bobby asked again.

“I will,” Cas answered, smiling back at Dean.

“And do you both promise to make the necessary adjustments in your personal lives so that you may live in a harmonious relationship together?”

“We do,” they answered in unison.

“Now in the spirit of joy and affirmation, I want to ask your families and friends a question. Do you, the families and friends of Dean and Cas, give them your blessing and support this day, wishing them a wonderful life together?” Bobby addressed the crowd.

“We do,” they murmured in response.

“Dean and Cas, now we come to your vows. May I remind you that saying your vows are one thing but nothing is more challenging than living them day by day. What you promise today must be renewed tomorrow and each day that stretches out before you. You wrote your own so I’ll hand this off to you, Dean,” Bobby said, gesturing to him.

He took a deep breath, pulling out the piece of paper he’d scribbled his vows on, “Cas,” he started, glancing up at him nervously, “Before we met, I didn’t think I could love someone like this. I spent almost my whole life on the road, it was my past, present, and future. You changed all of that. You brought something into my life that I never thought I could have. You threw my life off course in the best, most unexpected way. We’ve been through so much, we were torn apart more times than I can count, but we always found our way back to each other. No matter what. I would be honored to spend my life with you. I love you, Cas.”

“Thank you, Dean,” Bobby said, turning to Cas, “Your turn.”

Cas smiled at him, wiping away the tears that had gathered in the corner of his eyes. He fished in his pocket, pulling out a paper that matched Dean’s, “Dean, ever since we met, knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about the whole world because of you. Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. You're the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know. You have taught me so much. You showed me what true happiness and love feel like. You mean the world to me and more. There’s no one in the world I’d rather share this and every moment for the rest of my life with. I love you so much, Dean.”

At this point, sniffs were ringing from everywhere. Bobby cleared his throat, “Thank you, Cas. May I have the rings now?” Jack stepped forward, holding the pillow in his hands. Cas took one and Dean took the other. “Dean,” Bobby prompted him.

Dean cleared his throat, “Cas, I give you this ring, that you may wear it, as a symbol of the vows we have made this day. I pledge you my love and respect, my laughter and my tears. With all that I am, I honor you,” he said, taking Cas’s hand and slipping the gold ring on. He gave it a little squeeze before letting go.

“Dean, I give you this ring, that you may wear it, as a symbol of the vows we have made this day. I pledge you my love and respect, my laughter and my tears. With all that I am, I honor you,” Cas repeated, his voice thick. Dean held out his hand and Cas slipped on the ring.

“Now may those who wear these rings live in love all their days. Now may the love, which has brought you together, continue to grow and enrich your lives. May you continue to meet with courage any problems, which may arise to challenge you. May your relationship always be one of love and trust. May the happiness you share today be with you always. And may everything you have said and done here today become a living truth in your lives.

“Dean and Castiel, we have heard your promise to share your lives in marriage. We recognize and respect the covenant you have made here this day before each one of us as witnesses. Therefore in the honesty and sincerity of what you have said and done here today and by the power vested in me by the internet, it is my honor and delight to declare you married and partners in life...for life.

“You may seal your vows with a kiss,” Bobby finished, smiling. Dean lunged forward, meeting Cas halfway. He heard people cheering and clapping in the background but couldn’t find it in himself to care. He was married. To Cas. And it was the best feeling in the world.

Bangs rang from either side of them, startling them out of the kiss. Rainbow confetti was falling around them. Charlie winked at him from over Cas’s shoulder, she had a confetti gun in her hand. Dean let out a full-body laugh which was promptly cut short when Cas pulled him in for another kiss.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34298860

[im-some-lionheart]

Dean Winchester is bisexual as fuck headcanons:

Dean has always known he's bisexual. He probably didn't even know bisexuality was A Thing until he was in his 30s though.

And he probably hated putting a label on it. But he knew he liked boys as well as girls since forever.

When he was younger, he probably thought everyone else liked everyone too because "people are hot. why wouldn't you like people?" (13 yo dean, probably)

Teen!Dean cuffed his jeans. I don't have neither proofs nor doubts about this one.

He learned about and internalized homophobia later in his teens. Probably at school, or from John's and other hunters' remarks and jokes. Or both.

He probably thought to himself "well, at least I like girls too, so it's not as bad, I'm not actually queer." and proceeded to suppress his feelings for boys and over compensate because he didn't want to be outed as something that he wasn't. He wasn't gay. He was just him. And people were hot. So he liked people.

Of course, he eventually dated guys in school, but it was always in secrecy, always as friends, always while publicly making out with a cheerleader (a bonus in immature dean's brain). It was the 90s in Middle America. It couldn't have been otherwise.

In some schools though, word caught on, and it was hell for him. He learned soon to keep that side of him hidden from privy eyes if he wanted to be left alone.

John caught him making out with a guy at least once. He might have punched Dean, give the guy time to gather his clothes and run for his live, and gone for a drink. Or. He might have stood there, staring at his son, ask the kid to leave please, and walked out of the room without saying another word. (or it happened twice and he did both)

Either way, he told Sam and Dean to pack their stuff and moved them to another city the very next day, giving Dean no chance to say goodbye.

Dean bi!panicked and tried to explain, but John refused to listen. Refused to even acknowledge what had happened. Every time Dean started "dad, about what you saw...", John would cut him off and remind him of his mission: watch out for Sammy.

He made sure next time his father came home, he found him with a girl instead. John didn't say a word to him either way, but he was polite to the girls.

Dean eventually mastered the art of flirting subtly, walking perfectly that line between figuring out if a guy was into him and outing himself into being beaten senseless.

He walked that line masterfully for years hunting with John and then, later on, with Sam. Neither noticed when he'd come home late after they'd interrogated a particularly handsome suspect.

He always made sure they noticed when he'd come home late, when the suspect was a particularly beautiful girl.

He may or may not have learned to walk that line by being beaten senseless a couple of times.

When he saw Lisa again, he couldn't believe she was still as beautiful as he remembered her.

He cried when he told Lisa he was bi. He kept thinking "she needs to know" and made a whole deal of telling her, dragging the words for half an hour. She just smiled and kissed him and held him as he cried. That was the first night he thought he loved her.

A part of him wished he was actually Ben's father. A large part of him always regretted not being able to have or truly enjoy that apple-pie life.

He knew Jo was bi too since the moment he saw her. They bonded over it. They may or may not have made out once.

He absolutely 100% had A Thing™ with Benny in Purgatory

He absolutely 100% had a threesome with himself and Cas from 2014.

He absolutely 100% had orgies with Crowley when he was a demon

There's a 50% chance he had 1on1 sex with Crowley.

He always thought Jimmy Novak was hot but he didn't begin to fall for Cas until around s6-7

His subtle brand of flirting didn't work with Cas immediately like it had worked with Anna, Benny, and so many other people and creatures he'd met throughout his life, so he just dropped it.

Dean's flirting didn't work because the angel was really bad at social interactions not because he didn't like Dean back, but he wasn't sure so he never dared do anything more than just flirt, out of both trauma and fear of being rejected by his best friend.

He jerks off while smelling the trenchcoat in s8 at least once. He, of course, cries immediately afterwards.

He sees the world around him become increasingly more progressive and he loves it. He'd never come out or go to a parade or get married but he loves that other people can have those options.

He never tells Sam how he feels about men/Cas in particular because why would he risk losing his brother's love and respect like that?

A part of him knows Sam won't care, he's still his brother. But the other part never left that motel room where John caught him making out with his friend.

He's convinced himself he doesn't need to tell anybody because it's his life and who gives a shit. He doesn't need to prove anything.

He eventually gets used to his and Cas' relationship. He loves the dynamic they have, and though he sometimes wishes he could just ravage the angel, he knows it's not an option. So he accepts it and learns to enjoy their relationship for what it is: strictly platonic. So he stops flirting and accepts Cas as his best friend. Nothing more.

This means, he's furious when Cas confesses to him. Of course you'd do this when it's already too late you son of a bitch.

In the middle of the tears and the anger and the regret, he manages to say "and I you, Cas" and his heart breaks when the portal opens, which means those words brought Cas true happiness.

He tries to move on without the angel but it isn't easy. He eventually finds an excuse to die quickly. Some dumb hunt his daddy never finished. Sure, that'll do.

When he finally hears the words "Hello, Dean" once again, he knows himself the happiest man on Earth Heaven.

[touchstarvedsam]

I was really gonna ignore that "superior"natural thing but I saw that they seem to have some talented artists. So I thought maybe they are doing something interesting (even if it's destiel) so I checked out their Google doc and omg I'm HOWLING! Eileen calls Sam moosie, Cas calls Dean squirrel. Dean calls Cas kitten, Sam calls Eileen otter. They say it's just a incollection of ideas that might not make it into the project, but you get a sense of what you're dealing with there. And this is from1/?

A brief perusal to see how much attention Sam gets compared to Dean & Cas (a word search gave 27/87/100 results for each respectively, so not too much attention to Sam. But sure, Sam is the favorite character of some of their writers). I'm sure a deeper reading will unearth more (like, Dean saying you are home to Cas, who says we're not at the bunker, Dean replies but you are home. That sounds like something Dean would say. And Dean wishes a tulpa into existence 'cause he misses Cas too much)2/?

They say they want to eliminate plot holes but it seems what's a plot hole depends on whether it serves their ship: purgatory stays (we know they love that arc) even if it makes no sense for Crowley and Cas to go through that much in S6 when apparently there are many ways in and out. Cas, the guy who failed at almost everything he's done, is a "master strategist". Every other retcon of later seasons stays as long as it serves ship purposes. Sam gets his fair share of attention but Dean is the3/?

One who teaches Cas about being human including the textures of food (Sam and Cas pbj moment erasure) and Cas should be the one to teach Jack about his powers (no mention of Sam and Jack's relationship). Other ooc things: Cas rides a bike and when Dean asks says it reminds him of flying. After Cain, Dean takes Cas to the farm for bees (?). Cas and Dean snuggle. Knowing Cas is alive gives demon Dean strength to fight to be cured? Dean speaks enochian to Cas. Cas making a mixtape for Dean. 4/?

Cas being in regarding Dean. "Baby jack walking around in cas’s trench coat going “I’m an angel”." Home alone type ep with Jack. Dean kissing cas's forehead when he's dead in 13.01. Crowley is Jack's godfather and gets him a hellhound pet. Sam has a pet fish? Dean sings you're my sunshine to Cas as he sleeps. "Uncle Gabe". Apparently John dropped Sam and Dean off at Bobby's all the time? I don't think this is canon? Keep 15.18 but change 19&20 (of course). There's no drama or angst like 5/?

Kevin's death or Crowley's death or anything that might add tension to the story. Unless of course it serves the ship so plenty of trauma for Cas including darkness (from the empty) and sharp objects (from Naomi). A small mention of Sam's trauma with Lucifer, thank God, but it's interesting that they have so little Sam. They can say they'll flesh out more arcs for Sam but it's clear he's not a priority from how he's not present where he should be. For example, Dean will explain everything 6/?

To Mary and break her out of her brainwashing. But where's Sam? She's his mother too. Other than Eileen Sam's most meaningful relationship seems to be with his pet fish (still confused about that). Even if this project gets better in the future, which I doubt, it's clear what the direction here is. It baffles me that they think this is superior to the show we have, as problematic as the show is. I wish them best of luck but I don't have any high hopes for this. Thanks for the laughs though. 7/7

Sorry for that long ass rant in your inbox. It's in the middle of the night but I'm cackling after reading their doc and I had to share it with someone. I thought you might find it amusing as well. Hopefully all my asks go through. On the one hand, I feel bad hating on a fan project. But the way they've positioned it ("superior"), the blatant disrespect to Sam, and all the shit their side has pulled since the finale (and long before that) has really irked me. Again, sorry.

I just- this whole thing was a whirlwind of nonsense, it took me a whole week to process it. I don’t even know where to start here, or if I want to just yeet my laptop out my bedroom window into the snow. They really consider their ideas superior to the original show? More like Inferiornatural, to be honest. Superinferiornatural? They can’t even seem to characterize them correctly, let alone come up with a decent plotline or idea.

So we’ll start with the nicknames, since that is where you started. The whole thing is painfully out of character, but the worst (and funniest) of them all is Dean calling Cas “kitten,” I might actually laugh myself into an early grave with that one. Dean gives nicknames to shorten people’s names (besides Sam; Sammy is the only person who gets an extended nickname). He’s not going to give someone a longer nickname than the original nickname he uses for them! And Cas wouldn’t actually give nicknames, especially not giving Dean the nickname Crowley gave him??? Otter?! Moosie?!  W H A T. Can we move on from grade school kiddie crush nicknames?

I’m currently manifesting Dean saying “kitten” in his gruff voice with that lip curl he does sometimes and I’m cracking up about it. Thanks for the amusement, heIIers.

Of course Sam would only be mentioned 27 times to Cas’ 100 because Sam means nothing to them. He’s only ever either been in their way or a cheerleader for that horribly characterized ship of theirs. I just love how, in order to make DestieI, they have to butcher the characters so irreparably that they’re unrecognizable. Good for them, they can’t even have fanfiction of their ship where the characters keep their canon personalities. 10/10 would laugh at again.

I love the Sam erasure. It’s true to the heIIers’ character at least. They’re a one-trick pony. I’m so used to it by now that I’m totally desensitized to their bullshit. But Dean speaking Enochian? What? When and how did he learn that? I can’t see Dean in his 30s sitting there willingly to learn the language of the angels. Not even if his “kitten” is the one to teach him. Dean doesn’t give a fuck about that. If any of them is going to learn Enochian, it’ll be Sam, and they can fight me on that. I will kick anyone’s ass that argues.

I hope the mixtape Cas makes for Dean is just 4 hours of that Spaghetti song by The Wiggles because Cas sucks at doing human things.

I’d love to see the Sam erasure in the Regarding Dean one. Just swap Sam out for Cas? So Cas is the only one Dean recognizes? Hmm. Where would Sam go? A smoothie place? Yeah, as if Dean would remember the angel who he’d barely known for 8 years at that time over Sam who he’d known since he was 4 years old, lol. Sure, Jan.

The entire 5th ask is WILD, nonnie. A pet fish? Dean singing you are my sunshine? Dean kissing Cas’ forehead? LMFAO. Crowley is Jack’s godfather. The KING OF HELL is Jack’s GODfather. I’m- hgfjdksl I’m sure Dean who was ripped apart by hellhounds would love for Jack to have a pet hellhound. Yeah. Absolutely. “Uncle Gabe” yeah, fuck that guy in particular. Honestly, I’m surprised they haven’t erased Eileen to make SabrieI endgame in their fic. SabrieI is the Sam version of DestieI. It’s just as nasty and abusive :) which was why the heIIers ship it. They’re into abuse. It’s their shtick.

I do wonder what the point of the fish is... Sam has always loved and wanted a dog... you’d think they’d give Sam a dog... but I forgot they don’t pay attention to the show unless the episode has Mushy in the credits. I literally saw a heIIer say they skipped episodes if Mushy wasn’t in the credits... so they don’t know how to characterize Sam or Dean, but from this message they don’t even know how to characterize Cas who seems to be their precious uwu baby angel so I’m not surprised. I can’t wait for them to start releasing this shitshow. It makes for good fodder to make fun of them all over again. They really watched a grand total of 146 out of 327 episodes and thought, “Yeah, my opinion about the show definitely matters,” and I think that’s fucking hilarious.

Sorry for taking so long to respond! Hope I did a good job, nonnie. <3