#and record even though your voice is getting weaker by the day

[everysongineverykey]

honestly it bugs me a little how 99% of the comments on the these are the days of our lives music video, one of my personal favorite queen mvs for pure aesthetics and mood, are people calling it "heartbreaking" and hand-wringing about how SICK and PALE and CLOSE TO DEATH freddie mercury looks. like. wooow the dying man looks like he's dying? really? well done, nancy drew! have a gold star! yes aids is an awful fucking disease and yes hiv positive people shouldn't be reduced to washed-out portraits of the words "inspirational" and "strong" by the media and they should have their pain acknowledged but guys. freddie, by all accounts, very much Did Not Want To Dwell On It. he told his friends he had aids and then immediately was like but i don't want to talk about it. i just want to spend the rest of my time making as much music as i can. and his bandmates accepted that and supported him! he wanted to spend the time he had doing what he loved with people he loved and who loved him and he did. he had, by all accounts, a great last year. that one person who took the days of our lives bts color footage and edited Sad Piano Music TM over the entire thing and intercut interviews with the rest of the band also with Sad Piano Music TM and made it so we could barely hear freddie even say anything... it makes my blood boil like he's literally just. like it's literally just footage of him walking and discussing a take with the director and standing waiting for the take to start like. normal video filming stuff. and all anyone can see is a tragedy because he's walking stiffly or whatever

[catnip-smuggler-radio]

Prompt #9 : Yawn

Rise of a Desert Stray Part 8 (Missed Prompt 8 cause of work but keeping the story going in order lol) Krick’s green eyes squinted at the chamber that yawned before him.  The glow of the blue lights stung his eyes and made them water as his pupils tried to narrow as they beheld true light for the first time in days.  He looked around, confused and unsure if this was real, the end, or another hellish challenge.* He was nearly naked now, most of his clothes having been torn off by monstrous talons or ripped to make bandages.  Dried blood covered his body and numerous wrappings covered his arms.  But as wild and damaged as his body looked, it was his mind that had taken the true beating.  The dark spells and curses he’d endured had pushed him to the very limits of his mental endurance.  He’d seen and experience things he didn’t totally understand inside that dark pit and only his ability to consume aether had saved him as he’d eater away at the curses and hexes like a hungry cannibal. He licked his lips and heard clapping. “Well done my boy!” *Crate came rushing up do him, dressed in grey robes now and looking clean and fresh.  Crate slapped Krick on the shoulder and Krick shoved Crate away as he pointed a knife at him. “Get away.  This is another trick!”  Krick pressed his back against the wall as as more figure entered the room.  The room itself was a simple square with gilded columns rising along the edges. In the middle was a massive, bronze bowl with a blue flame burning inside. “This is no trick.”  came a woman’s voice.  Krick watched a tall woman wearing a mirror-covered masked and flanked by a hyur and a lalafel enter the room.  The other figures bowed.  Even Crate bowed, though not as deeply as everyone else.  “You survived our trials and stand before us now as one ready to join our ranks.” “Join you?”  Krick blinked, his vision blurry from lack of sleep.  “I’m just here to learn power from Crate.” “And you will.”  the woman eyed Krick and there was amusement in her tone behind her mirrored mask. “But power and knowledge have a cost. And that cost is your service to our cause.  But we can discuss that later.  First.”  she turned and looked into the blue flames. “Crate brought to us this man.  Today that man has endured our trials, killed his fears, and become one of us.  Welcome your new brother in death.” “Long may he endure.”  said the members in unison.  Krick wilted his ears and narrowed his eyes at that.  Crate suddenly slapped Krick on the shoulder again and chuckled.  “Come, Krick.  You must be exhausted.” Krick shook his head, yawned, and then collapsed into Crate.  Crate grunted at the barbarian’s weight and struggled to keep the suddenly unconscious Krick upright.  “He could have at least waited till the ceremony was complete before passing out.  Maybe he’s weaker than you thought.”  the scathing words and tone came from Anon Nonnon, the lalafel woman eyeing Crate smugly from the Speaker of the Dead’s side.  Crate simply smiled back as he used magic to levitate Krick’s bulk and began pulling the sleeping man to his new room. “My -apprentice-”  there was almost pride in that word.  “Is simply tired.” “He took four days. The longest completion time on record.” Anon smirked.  “And yet he still completed it.”  Crate replied.  “Don’t worry Anon.  The finest wine takes times to create. But the wait is always worth it.  Don’t worry. I meant what I said. He will kill you and take your seat.” The gathered members of The Order of the Eclipse looked between the two awkwardly.  These two were among the strongest, if not the strongest, members of the order.  To see them bickering made everyone uneasy. “I look forward to spilling your wine.”  Anon cackled, waving a dismissive hand.  “Enough.” The Speaker of the Dead ordered.  “Crate, take your apprentice to his room and restore him.  Once he is well, bring him to me.” “Of course, my mistress.”  Crate bowed to the Speaker of the Dead and then dragged the floating Krick away.  As he walked, he grinned and congratulated himself. Krick had survived.  He had found someone worth making his apprentice.  Of course if Krick survived the learning process was something else but, it was a start.

[linsallyworld]

Uneven Odds (Lilith Clawthorne x reader fanfic)

Chapter 15

Chapter 14

Words:8.400

You had big plans for your university years. You wanted to get a job, move out of your parents' house, and rent an apartment. Then you would start thinking about your career plan. You thought that maybe you could write professionally, or even become a university professor. Dating was not in your plans, you didn't even like anyone. 

But do you know what else wasn't in your plans? Being kicked out of your home, falling into a world completely different from your own, being welcomed by the people of the Owl House, and then finding out that the person you were meant to be with was...Lilith Clawthorne. 

Falling into this world brought numerous surprises. You found out that you are good with spells, even though you are human. You found out that witch milkshakes could be surprisingly delicious. And you didn't have to worry due to the fact they didn't use milk.

Also, you discovered, when you fell into this world, that dating Lilith could be one of the most extraordinary things that ever happened to you.

She is a very peculiar kind of girlfriend, which you named soft-hot. She had these two spectrums inside her. She is that kind of girlfriend who will learn how to make hot chocolate the way you like it and give you a kiss on the forehead when she hands it to you while you read about deals in the demon realm on the living room couch. But also the kind of girlfriend who can easily push you into the nearest dark corner to steal a breathtaking kiss, sliding her thigh between your legs when she needed you and couldn't help herself. She noticed, quite clearly the effect her legs have on you, as well as her voice, her fingers. Well, Lilith is a very attentive girlfriend.

Soft-hot. You loved that combination with everything in you. And you were never going to complain, but it was a hard thing to deal with when you hadn't decided yet what to do with the information you had.

Another thing you discovered is that there were several books about mating bonds.

You and Lilith had spent the whole week studying about this. You had been getting books and books about old agreements in the demon realm from the library, as well as about relationships and bonds in general. Some were in different languages so that only Lilith could read. But most of the time you were able to help her with the research and it was particularly fascinating research if you were honest. The first records of mating bonds go back thousands of years, it's an extremely old bond and you have no idea how humans have just been ignoring it for millennia. 

Sure there are legends about soul mates since the world is a world. But nothing tangible, nothing like the boiling isles put together in complete volumes.

You got the information you needed from a fairly recent book, actually, that had more in-depth studies on magical covenants. Some pretty interesting pictures made you feel like a girl in sixth grade with her first anatomy book. The thread is something interesting, not everyone has it but it's something relatively common. Anyway, for the mating bond to be consummated, the mates must come together. If one of the mates makes the other come without themselves coming it won't make the bond consummate to pieces but the moment of consummation may be weaker. You regretted not letting go that day for sure.

There are stronger and weaker mating bonds. Only the mates can tell how connected they are to each other. You almost raised your eyebrows as Lilith read this part aloud. You hadn't even consummated the bond yet and you could feel her emotions perfectly, sometimes even hear her thoughts. It was pretty obvious that your bond wasn't poor in any way. Also, and this reminded you of that day at the Knee, other witches can tell the bond by the smell. Not exactly the perfume, but more like the natural smell of two mates becomes quite similar. 

In the end, you decided that quickies would not be an option. Lilith wanted the consummation to be perfect, and you couldn't deny that you wanted it too. It was an old bond, and as difficult as it was, you didn't want to waste it because of your sexual urges.

So you chose to wait. The perfect opportunity. Not the wedding, for the Titan's sake, you don't think you can hold out until next week.

"Please, Eda, pleeeeeaaaaaase. I swear, we won't make a mess, we'll sleep in the living room and no one will touch anything." You take your eyes off the fantasy novel about the human world you were reading, Luz's recommendation, to the scene unfolding in front of you. Luz had been begging all week for Eda to let the children come to the slumber party. The owl lady believed she would forget about it by the end of the week, which she didn't.

"Okay, fine. As long as their parents agree. I don't want Odalia Blight, in my house, announcing that I kidnapped her daughter. Okay?!" Luz nods with a small, soft smile. Odalia Blight...Considering her last name you believe she is Amity's mother. But it's not something you pay much attention to.

As soon as she is out of Eda's vision, Luz does a little dance of joy before running up the stairs, which makes you chuckle.

It's almost night, you figure the guys will be here soon.

"I'm going upstairs and have a shower. I'll be right back to help you with some snacks." Eda puts her hands together as if pretending a prayer when you get up from the couch.

"What would I be without you?" You chuckle as you squeeze the owl lady's shoulder.

"Probably a woman with five kids at home and no snacks." Eda twitches her lips in agreement. You close your book with the bookmark and then head toward the stairs. 

When you reach the second floor, you sense that Lilith is still in her room, probably studying. You should warn her that there will be three more teenagers in the house in a few hours. You say that this is the only reason to go knocking on her door, but internally you know that this is a lie. Any excuse to see her for a few minutes.

Lilith opens the door almost before you remove your fist from the wood. She has some red paint smeared on her cheek and is wearing classic pajamas with a Dragon Ball Z blouse. She's smiling, teeth and all, and you frown slightly, but don't even have time to ask before she grabs your wrist and pulls you inside. 

"I figured it out." Your eyebrows pronounce a little more as she bounces near her desk. She was in the soft mood now, soft and cheerful. You look at what she was doing. There are open books, on geography and relief, as well as some discarded glyph drawings, some papers with her elegant handwriting. But what catches your eye are the two papers placed perfectly in the center of the table. The drawing is pretty similar to the one you saw with Luz at the Knee, but complete. A circle, with a square in the middle and another smaller circle inside, and two lines cutting through it, one horizontally and one vertically. "Try it!" she asks, putting one of the papers in your hand. "But on the floor." She points to a recent scratch on her desk that wasn't there before. 

You kneel and look at her once more with that childlike excitement before you touch the glyph. The familiar tingle rises up your arm as the design rises in gold. And so the paper crumbles to make way for a massive ball of stone that weighs down on the floor.

"It worked!" Lilith bounces more behind you and you can't help but smile. It really did work, a stone glyph, Luz would be fascinated with it. Maybe not as much as Lilith was. You can almost feel her excitement in the air, and how happy she is to have finally figured it out.

She helps you to stand again and then she grabs the remaining paper, probably to run after her teacher and show her what she has discovered. But you hold her by the hand.

"Luz has invited Willow, Gus, and Amity to a slumber party." Lilith frowns slightly and then smiles.

"Can you make that cake again?" You shake your head in promise with a small smile spreading on your mouth. 

"Sure." And she grins so broadly at such a simple thing that it makes your heart swell in your chest. "I'm helping Eda with the snacks." Lilith nodded and leaned over to place a quick, warm kiss on your cheek.

"I'll show this to Luz!" You giggled as she came out in small steps and bounds into Luz's room. She could be extremely adorable when she wanted to be.

It's so hard to just not grab her and not let anyone else touch her. She is the sunshine that you didn't want anyone else to feel.

(...)

The kids arrived just as you and Eda were trying to figure out if you should bake fairy pies together with human cakes. You heard the sound of the door slamming and numerous voices at once, that's how you knew there were 5 kids in the house now.

"Hey, guys." You greet as you arrive in the living room. Gus waves energetically at you, Willow smiles with her eyes closed and Amity just grins with the corner of her mouth. You can't help but think that the way someone smiles says a lot about that person's personality.

"Do not destroy my house, thank you." It was Eda's greeting that made Luz slap her hand against her own face and you let out a low chuckle.

"Come on! You won't believe it." Luz takes Amity's hand lightheartedly as she pulls her and her friends into the main room. "Lilith discovered a stone glyph, which ultimately demonstrated how our trip to the Knee was not in vain." Amity went increasingly red as she was led into the house and you had to lower your face to laugh. 

They were adorable. Watching them interact would be one of your favorite things about that event.

"Sometimes I think I should try to give them a little push." Eda whispers beside you and you turn to her with frowning eyebrows and narrowed eyes.

"And didn't you think to give your sister a little push?" Eda rolls her eyes hard before starting her path to the kitchen, the sound of children starting some sort of game is quite evident.

"You guys are adults. I should have punched each of you to establish my dominance in the sisterhood." It's your turn to roll your eyes briefly before accompanying her into the kitchen. "You know, I never had a younger sister." She is grinning broadly as she looks at you now, wiggling her eyebrows rather suggestively. "I wonder what kind of pranks you would fall for. It was always so hard with Lilith. She's just too smart." You stand in your spot on the countertop to start making some sandwiches and give the owl lady a particularly disbelieving look. 

"Thank you for insulting my intelligence and threatening me in the same sentence. I already feel like part of the family." Eda laughs out loud before stroking your shoulder, amber eye glowing gold as she leans against the counter.

"It's actually incredibly nice to have you here." You smile, but find it breaking in the middle, because your heart seems to swell and break a little at the same time. You're not sure how long it's been since you've been truly wanted somewhere. "Well, I'll go find mattresses for the invaders. Can you handle the cooking by yourself?" You just wave your hand. Cooking also relieves the head and you don't mind, you enjoy.

Eda gives you a knowing pat on the shoulder before she leaves.

You smile when you hear laughter around the house. 

It's really nice to feel wanted. It feels really good to feel happy maybe for the first time in...who knows how long.

(...)

Cooking things specifically for witches was not your specialty, but it wasn't that bad. You had a recipe book and material to work with.

You are just finishing making some particularly healthy human sandwiches for you and Luz when Lilith enters the kitchen. You don't even see her. You feel when she enters the room as if the thread knew she was near, signaling where she was. You feel like a whale with sonar every time this happens. Her perfume comes to you next, stronger after the bath, warmer. It's refreshing and seems to calm your mind.

She hugs your waist just for a moment to kiss your cheek and then goes towards the refrigerator.

It's such a simple gesture and yet you can't stop your heart from beating a little faster. It's simple, but at the same time, it's almost involuntary. It's involuntary caring, it's routine.

"We should have made plans. I don't think I ever had that many teenagers in a house." You chuckle at this as she rolls her eyes rather dramatically. Considering the voices coming from the living room, you guess they are arguing about which type of magic is the best. Luz's response was the most obvious, "all together."

"Stop. Willow and Gus are great and I know you like Amity or you wouldn't have been her tutor." It's a good thing that Luz had talked so much about her crush because it granted you quite a bit of information about your girlfriend as well. 

Lilith leans against the counter and only then do your eyes go to her. She's wearing a black sweater and soft fabric pants that look so good on her legs. Her hair is tied up in a bun, the smaller strands framing her face, and she is sipping a glass of apple blood. Long fingers tapping their nails rhythmically against the wood.

When you look at her like that...It's hard not to think that choosing to wait for the perfect opportunity was a shitty move. You could just go up to the second floor now, lock yourselves in her room and consummate this bond. The possibility is very tempting. And she is too tempting. Oh how you were tempted every goddamn second by that most appraising look, by those black painted lips, by that long neck, by that too white skin that seemed to be asking to be marked, by her fingers, her voice, those legs that she knew how to hide so well.

 You don't know how you managed to supervise your self-control for so long.

"Stop staring at me." She says as she turns the rest of the red liquid in her mouth, without removing her eyes from you. You feel the hint of her smile as she washes the glass in the sink, even though you don't see it.

"Does it make you nervous when I stare?" You answer with a slightly raised eyebrow, humor dripping through your voice. She looks at you over the shoulder, her gray eye glinting silver in knowledge. You were playing with fire here, and you knew it.

She takes a breath and then reaches over casually to lean her hip against the side of where you are making the sandwiches. You watch as her eyes travel across your face, down your neck, across your torso, and down your legs. Shameless. You swallow hard as she stares at you like a prey she intends to eat on her nest. Her gaze lingers on your hips before she slowly returns to your face. Her eyes seem darker, pupils slightly dilated, but bright, like a night bird. She smiles, just softly, running her tongue along the corner of her mouth. You can't stop the shiver that runs down your spine.

"You look just about good enough to eat over that counter." You feel any witty response of yours get stuck in your throat. Oh. What an image she has just given you. Your ears are on fire and you have to lower your head because your whole face feels so hot. She, between your legs, against the rough wood, her mouth on you, the hair falling in her face, the smell of sweat. Uh. You have to stop yourself from squeezing your thighs together.

Your inner muscles tighten and you find your fingers trembling around the slices of bread.

Lilith lets out a graceful laugh before leaning over just enough to be in front of your face. She reaches out to lift your chin with the tip of her index finger.

"What's the matter, my darling? I thought you liked teasing." This is the first time she has used a possessive pronoun with you. Your whole body trembles. Her voice has a slight tone of amusement as her breath feels really warm against your own lips. You again watch her eyes play between your mouth and your own eyes.

Your heart could easily escape through your mouth. How does she manage this? She had barely touched you and your breathing was already failing.

"Lilith..." It was the middle of the kitchen. Anyone could enter, including one of the five kids who were currently in the house. It was not a safe place for that kind of interaction. But do you control your body or your mind at that moment? No. She surrounds you, she sinks her claws into you so difficult that it's extremely hard to have a coherent thought when she is close like that.

"Shh..." She whispers getting close enough to lean her mouth against yours "Let me kiss you." And when she speaks in that tone, with those glowing eyes you don't think you can stop yourself.

Her lips fall over yours and you dissolve around her. She seems like a mist, slowly penetrating around you until she has taken you completely inside her. 

You think you might as well be consumed. You don't care.

A weak sigh leaves your nose and you wrap your arms around her neck before kissing her back. It always feels more intense than the last time, and it always feels like you can never get enough of her. She thrusts herself against you, her nails sinking into the counter exactly beside your waist, but not touching you except with her mouth.

She's teasing you. You know it. You feel it.

You pull her by the shoulders, trying to feel more of her, trying to stop the pulse that is growing stronger against your skin. The shorter strands of hair rub against your knuckles.

Lilith lets out a giggle against your mouth before pulling your bottom lip between her teeth.

"It's my entertainment to watch your face turn so red." She whispers as she wraps her hand around your chin. You're trembling, aren't you? She has such an effect on you. You are so easily malleable around her it's ridiculous. "Is it good when I kiss you?" You find yourself choking, but the answer doesn't seem to come anyway. This woman. She knows what her voice does to your nerves, she knows perfectly well what her mouth on yours does. 

She is learning so well how to take you out of your ordinary state.

She is so aware of the power she has over you and she enjoys every second of it.

"Lilith..." It's just her name and she leans into the sound, breathing deeply against your face. Your thumbs trace her jawline, warm and firm, you want her mouth on yours again so badly it feels like it hurts under your skin. "Please..." She may want to tease you, but she seems to be as weak to your requests as you are to hers. Because in the next second she slams her mouth on yours again, her hands sinking to your hips. 

The world disappears. It's just her mouth, consuming yours. It's just her hair between your fingers. It's just her body so pressed to yours that you can feel her heartbeat, it's quite racing, as is her breath on your face, quite irregular. You feel her thrust her hips between your legs, almost pushing you to sit on the counter. You thrust forward to try to climb up.

"Hm-hm!" The intrusive sound makes you jump away from her, slamming your hips against the counter, hard enough to hurt. You almost whimper with the pain spreading through the sensible bone. It's a loud enough throat-clearing sound that makes your heart pound at the possibility of Luz or Amity or Gus or Willow...Oh Titan, don't let it be King.

But it's pure relief that takes your bones when you turn around, there is no kid. And you let out the breath you didn't even realize you were holding. It's Eda who is standing in the archway, with two sleeping bags under her arms.

"Get a room, you two. For the titan's sake and for my sake." She rolls her eyes and you lower your head, feeling your ears reasonably warm, you don't know if it's need or if it's shame. Maybe a little of both.

"Sorry." You mutter, and Lilith just lets out a mischievous giggle before turning away from you to grab a tray of the snacks you had already made.

"Let's take that before you burst with shame." You really want to finger-flick her on the head because she was the one who started it in the first place, but she is already too far away for you to reach so you just take the other tray of cakes and candies and follow her into the living room.

The kids have already made a real mess. There are books in a lot of places, plants that Willow seems to have grown to demonstrate something, board games, and lots of little clothes scattered about. You frown until you realize that they are playing dress-up games with King in different outfits. He was currently dressed like a supermodel on the red carpet, lipstick and all.

You let out a chuckle before placing the tray on the coffee table, taking a seat next to Lilith on the couch. She just gives you a little wink, to which you respond by pushing her shoulders slightly.

"So..." Eda begins, dropping the sleeping bags on the floor and rubbing her fingers across her forehead. She seemed to be having the time of her life. "One of you will have to sleep on the couch I only found two mattresses in my junk rooms." You frown slightly and you don't even see it when you speak.

"I sleep on the couch. You guys take mine, no problem." It's only one night and you really don't see a problem because you have slept in harsher places than Eda's couch. The bed in your grandmother's summer house looked like a board stretched out on springs and they are kids, they are growing up, they need a mattress more than you do.

Slumber parties are also more fun when you all sleep together. And you didn't want to run the risk of Amity sleeping on the couch and Luz missing the opportunity to stare into her eyes until sleep.

"You may sleep with me." And it's as if someone has simply silenced the room.

An embarrassing and extremely unannounced silence spreads through the room in a way that makes your whole body feel very warm and all your hair stands on end. Your ears feel a little numb as well.

Amity, Willow, Luz, Gus, and King stop whatever they are doing to look back at you and then at Lilith and what she just said. You hear Eda let out a not-so-discreet muffled laugh. 

If your face was red before, it burns now. Lilith just told you to sleep with her. Sleep with her. Oh. Your fingers look very interesting now.

"Willow and Guz take the remaining sleep bags, Luz with the one in her room, Amity with yours, and you with me." You bite your lips hard enough to draw blood, feeling your ears complain from how hot they are. Your heart begins to beat faster, a lot faster. Gosh, could anyone see it beating through your blouse?

More importantly. Could Lilith feel what you were feeling right now?

"Okay." You say even if you are panicking and your face is so hot right now that you think you might turn into a human tomato. 

Well, you were waiting for the perfect opportunity and it sort of...Happened? There was no reason for you to sneak into Lilith's room in the middle of the night and now...There is? The adrenaline seems to run pretty rapidly throughout your body now, your limbs are at the point for you to run out the front door.

"What is that cake made of?" It's Gus who cuts through this extremely awkward moment around you and you take a second to get back into this background to answer him.

"It's chocolate." You reply, more out of orbit than usual.

Titan. You're going to have a breakdown.

"Come pick a wine with me." Her voice sounds low, low enough so that even if everyone was around you, only you could hear. Your head moves affirmatively, but you are not sure if you really respond.

She grabs your fingers and you think that she sort of carries you back to the kitchen, while Eda throws herself on the couch, eyes following you with interest. She's probably wondering if you are going to desecrate her kitchen counter again.

You lean against the kitchen wall, trying to breathe as best you can, trying not to freak out. It's Lilith. It's just Lilith. She's not going to do anything you don't want her to do.

The problem is that you want to and you have no idea how to have sex with someone you really care about. Oh, your first time should have been like this, nervous, worried. 

You hear her rummaging through the small wine cellar that Eda has behind the cupboards. She really seems to be choosing. Anyway, her taste in drinks was better than yours, so you don't even think about interfering.

When she comes back to where you can see, she has a dark glass bottle and three glasses in her hands. Why are you panicking anyway? 

It's Lilith, for fuck's sake. It's your mate. Probably the person you've most trusted your whole life. You're not sure if you've ever trusted any friends, except for the people who lived in this house. And you certainly trust any of them more than you ever trusted your parents.

You trust her more than you trust yourself. Even in bestial form, you simply know that she won't hurt you. That doesn't stop the thread on your back from coiling, curling, and screaming under your skin. 

The witch opens the bottle on the table and then pours just one of the glasses with reddish liquid before approaching you again. Your fingers reach up almost on their own to hold the goblet. Lilith tilts her head then, just enough so that she can look into your eyes without having to lean in.

"You know I'm not insinuating anything, right?" Your eyes rise to her and her head returns to its normal angle. Your heart seems to swell a little in your chest just from looking at her and you're not sure why that happens. "I want you to sleep with me because I have a rather large nest and I don't want you sleeping on the couch." You swallow hard, feeling like you need to breathe properly again. Here she is, proving that she is everything and more. "I slept there while I was finishing my nest. It was a pretty slow torture." You smile a little at that, but that doesn't stop the chill from spreading through your belly at just the thought of sharing a bed, a nest with Lilith Clawthorne. It's not exactly panic now, it's anxiety.

She touches your chin with her fingertip, but this time it feels careful. Her touch feels a lot softer.

"But if you don't feel comfortable, then I'll sleep on the couch or with Eda and you sleep in my nest." Your shoulders fall, and you feel as if your own walls are falling in the same way. Her eyes are sincere, her smile is comforting, and her touch is simply sweet. She knows what you are feeling and she wants to reassure you.

Why did she have to be like this? Why did she have to be this lovely woman on so many levels that you couldn't help but feel any and all of your insecurities melt around her like warm butter?

She made you feel safe like no one ever did. She makes you want to just never leave her arms again.

She surrounds you. Body, soul and being.

If that thread in your back breaks from being so taut. To hell with that. It's only her that will be in your head.

"I'll sleep with you. No problem." She smiles wide now and it's so evident how happy she is...Because you trust her.

Yeah. You two were extremely similar on many levels.

You lean in to kiss the corner of her cheek and your heart pounds in your ears. Because that's the fragrance you'll smell all night long.

Maybe you never wanted to sleep alone again after that night.

(...)

It was easy to forget about the night's biggest event and the slight discomfort in your back because there was so much to occupy your mind.

You played a slightly different version of "double ditto". You had no cards from that game, so Luz suggested a new game, which is not surprising since she's probably the smartest person in the house. The premise is simple. You write categories on the top of the pad each of you has in hand, you all choose a letter of the alphabet, and you have two minutes to fill them all with words that start with that letter. If someone puts in matching words, it's 5 points, unique words are 10 points, and no words are 0 points.

Eda and Lilith got very competitive with this one in particular. You are almost afraid of the way they are writing fast and almost tearing the notepad.

In the end, it was Amity who won, with a 10 point advantage over Lilith. The pupil surpasses the master and they both seemed extremely proud of it. You saw the witch giving the girl a little wink and she smiling afterward.

There was also the blind man's bluff. You weren't too tempted to participate, because you, Eda, and Lilith had already had two whole bottles of wine, perfectly evident on the coffee table. But it was the game you had the most practice at. Even in your drunken state, you let them wrap a blindfold around your eyes and spin you around in the middle of the living room.

Thank goodness that the key to this game was your ears and not your focus.

You won that one, the easiest to find was Hooty who couldn't get out the door.

But after you went to hide near the stairs and the world turned a bit when you crouched down, you decided to sit down and give up the games that involved you walking around the house. Eda seemed to think the same, and you were almost asleep leaning against each other when they finished the last round. It was Gus who won, and you catch yourself wondering if he didn't take off his blindfold and build an illusion one because it was something you would definitely do if you had any focus to do an illusion spell now.

After that, you are just watching the kids' imitation game. Luz is imitating what reminds you a lot of a hot gas balloon, but it could be an elephant too.

Amity is particularly laughing a lot, her hand covering her mouth to avoid a louder sound. A laugh that makes a small smile appear on Lilith's face.

"She never laughed like that, before everything." She whispers to you, overall the noise the children are making.

Before everything...Before Luz.

Luz is the sunshine that basically made all the people in that room become friends. Maybe Willow and Gus and Eda and King were a case apart, but the rest...Nobody would even look each other in the face if it wasn't for Luz. She is an incredible girl. Everyone at the Owl House was an incredible person actually. They weren't just misfits, they were people with unique talents and impressive skills, exceptionally kind and you couldn't understand how that could be considered weird.

You're a little philosophical, aren't you? It's the alcohol stepping into your nerves, making you extremely silly and The Neighbourhood is playing constantly inside your head. Oh. You are so gay.

"I think it's a rat." Eda tries a guess and Luz makes a "what?" face. You wave your hand at the girl to ignore what the woman said, by the way her voice sounded, she was already a little philosophical too.

Your eyes stray to Lilith again. She's braiding Amity's hair, making it perfect for sleeping. You look at her now, and it might be the alcohol, but her hair looks so glamorous, so dark and shiny.  It's like the night itself.  Elizabeth Bishop had a poem about it, didn't she?

"The shooting stars in your black hair

in bright formation

are flocking where,

so straight, so soon?

- Come, let me wash it in this big tin basin,

battered and shiny like the moon."

Oh, that bitch was gay. Good for her.

"Thank you, Miss Lilith." Amity says as soon as she finishes the little braid by tying it with the hairband the girl used to hold the top of her hair. She smiles in a way that makes you tilt your head. She seems to have a rather motherly glow around her now.

"You should probably drop the Miss." She warns. Amity's eyes soften at the corners as she smiles more. So light.

Why do you get the feeling that this was not something she had much of? An adult who really wanted to give a little bit of affection and care around her?

Maybe it's something about kicked kids. You meet in the middle of the road, you can see the signs in each other.

"I promise I'll try." And she seems really sincere about it.

Lilith is simply relaxed as she leans her back against the couch, her hair brushing your thigh as she lays her head on the cushion.

"May I braid your hair?" Willow guesses Luz's impersonation. That was Principal Bump.

Her eyes go to you, they look softer too, but still bright, silver and green staring at you. Good thing you guys had stopped with the alcohol.

"I'm sorry?" She frowns, just slightly, just as if she really didn't understand the question.

"It's so long and beautiful." You trace your fingertips through her hair, it feels like silk between your fingers. "May I braid it?" She frowns again, but this time it's confusion. Why? She seems to want to ask but gives up when you just smile with a shrug. Lilith giggles next, probably at the immaturity of your request.

"Sure." And you have to remind yourself that jumping around is still a too 2000s teenage movie attitude for you to do.

You jump to the side of the couch and pat where you were previously sitting. Lilith has a small, disbelieving smile on her lips as she sits down with her back to you, facing Eda. She doesn't miss the opportunity to poke her sister with her foot, which makes Eda show her tongue.

Hooty realizes that he finally has a place to lie down and moves closer again to his place on Lilith's lap. She strokes his head in acknowledgement.

You kneel so that you can pull her hair from the front, forming a strand in your hands. She had quite a large amount of hair, it would be enough to play with. You start by braiding the top part, as was common for the French braid. Your fingers glide gently through the dark strands of hair, like the night sky itself. You believe that you can sprinkle her hair with stars and it will look just like the human night sky.

You catch yourself imagining what it would be like to braid her hair if it were still red and voluminous.

Once you finish the top part, you start taking the strands behind her ears, pulling them one by one to join the middle set, crossing over the middle strand. You keep repeating this, it's almost therapeutic. Her hair is reasonably long so it's simply relaxing to go strand by strand. Slow and therapeutic, you can feel your mind becoming more and more relaxed.

It's not until you get more than halfway through the hair that you are surprised by a very noticeable shudder on her part. Lilith's whole body trembles and your eyes widen.

You look at your own hands and realize that you have just taken the locks from the back of her head. The last strands to be placed in the middle strand. Oh. You had already been suspecting this, but now it's a clear confirmation.

"You have a sensitive nape. I'll keep that in mind." You say more to yourself than to her, a small mischievous smile rising on your mouth. You can almost see her rolling her eyes as you pull the last two strands to work with just the middle one. The way down is much quicker now and in less than a minute you manage to finish the braid, tying it off with a rubber band you found on the coffee table, probably holding the cards from some game.

"We also have very sensitive ears. Not that I should be hearing you. You're disgusting." Eda complained then as you placed the braid to fall delicately down Lilith's back. You looked at her curiously over the brunette's head.

"Sensitive ears?" Your eyebrows frown, pure interest coming out of your voice and the owl lady smiles in an almost wicked way. Lilith narrows her eyes in her direction, in a silent threat quite clear to your eyes.

"In the same way that we have keener hearing, we have a slightly more receptive cartilage, so to speak."  Oh. That was interesting. Sensitive cartilage where have you ever heard that?

"Oh." Your fingers almost itch to touch her ears. The moon earring shines, perfectly visible on the right now that there was no hair covering it.

"Don't you dare." Lilith replied with a little growl that made you laugh. She had to stop trying to be so grump if her face was red like that, it would never work.

"Please?" You pout as you look at her, resting your chin on her shoulder. She looks at you with the same narrowed eyes, but you know the effect your puppy eyes have on most people. Especially on her now.

She rolls her eyes hard before sighing.

"Fine. Just once." A rather silly grin appears on your mouth, pure excitement pumping through your veins. You raise your hand and trace the tip of the pointed ear between your thumb and forefinger delicately, it's really smoother than the human ear, thinner and even a little softer to the touch.

Lilith sighs, audibly, and it's surprising how she simply sinks between your legs with a soft shudder. Her back leaning against your chest as she closes her eyes and tilts her head toward your fingers, the contractions gone from her face, entirely. Just the slightly irregular breathing.

Her body feels quite warm and it takes everything in you not to wrap your free arm around her.

Certainly sensitive ears. Completely sensitive.

"Thre you go. You're welcome, Y/N." Eda murmurs as she closes her eyes with a giggle still on her lips.

You remove your fingers from her ear and Lilith immediately opens her eyes. Heat rises quickly up to her face, coloring her cheeks red and then the tips of her ears.

She was quite adorable when she was embarrassed.

"Lulu, why did you stop the petting?" She blinks several times before returning to this world and then sitting down again to continue petting Hooty's head. You think her fingers look a little shaky.

When the clock struck two in the morning. Eda decided that the adults should go to bed. It took you a second to remember that this also applied to you because you were currently in an extremely complex discussion with Luz about which was the best anime with girls as protagonists. She would choose Sailor Moon and you obviously Violet Evergarden. She also preferred Levi to Hange, which you thought was almost a crime.

Lilith caresses Amity's hair gently before she takes you by the hand and starts to pull you away from the living room, or else you would be all night proving that Hange Zoë was simply Daenerys from Attack on Titan.

Amity nods as you are heading toward the stairs and Lilith waves her free hand, a simple loving smile on her lips. You remember to think she would make a great mother someday. If she ever wanted to. Luz gives you a rather suggestive look that would have made you shake your head negatively if you had the time.

It's only when you reach the second floor that reality falls on your slightly drunk brain again. You would sleep with Lilith. The thread in your back tightens against your spine a little, but you push everything you are feeling to the back of your mind because Lilith was Lilith.

She wouldn't do anything you didn't want her to do. She was your mate. She holds your wrist with the greatest delicacy in the world.

"You have to get your toothbrush. About the pajamas, I can lend you one." You nod your head, your reasoning probably not understanding that she had her back turned and couldn't see. Let alone that you could just take one of your pajamas.

"I...I'll be right back." Her hand releases your wrist and you walk to the bathroom down the hall in search of your toothbrush.

You find yourself standing for long minutes... Simply standing in her bedroom doorway. Wondering whether you should go in or run out and slam your head against the nearest wall. The latter option was looking rather tempting.

You sigh deeply, trying to stop being a child, and knock on the door.

"Come in." You take a couple of deep breaths before doing as she asks.

Lilith is looking out the window as you enter the room. Arms crossed over the same sweater she had worn during the night, but the pants have changed to pajama pants, at least they weren't shorts. That's what you tell yourself. At least they are not shorts.

There is a pair of pants and another sweater on her desk chair. They look exceptionally soft when you pick them up and they smell like her, fresh and sweet.

Your eyes go to the large nest, it looked quite comfortable, far more comfortable than your bed, but that doesn't stop your spine from quivering at the prospect of sleeping side by side with Lilith Clawthorne.

You must have spent a few seconds staring at the nest because you don't notice when she approaches, a slight smile on her lips, delicate and warm.

"Go get changed, I'll make it comfortable." She touches your face, kisses your cheek, gently and softly.  And you have to stop yourself from sighing, her mist around you seems quite firm now. She doesn't need much.

You nod again, not trusting your voice to speak, and then force your legs until they work and lead you to her bathroom.

The bathroom in her room is exceptionally clean. Everything is in its perfect place and you change clothes quickly, getting rid of your jeans and shirt for the more comfortable clothes. You can smell her perfume as soon as the clothes settle on your body, it seems to permeate you now and you're not exactly complaining. The clothes are a little bigger too, considering she's taller, but you feel welcome.

This time you try not to stand in the doorway to go back to the room. Try to be a little more adult so to speak.

Lilith stands in front of the mirror as you get in. You frown slightly because she's running a cotton pad over her shoulders, apparently a small bottle of potion between her fingers on the other hand.

"I can't sleep with concealer on, even though I wish I could, it does a lot of damage if it stays on the skin for more than 24 hours." She says, without turning to you and you find your eyebrows pronouncing even more. Did she wear make-up? Besides eyeliner and black lipstick? Why did she apply makeup to her shoulders?

She still doesn't look at you when she returns the bottle to its place in the trunk. Does she look...embarrassed? That's what you feel at least, shame that exudes from her pores enough to reach you.

"Lilith?" And when you say her name out loud, she finally turns around. Your jaw drops almost in the same second.

She...She has freckles. Freckles that spread down her nose, up her cheeks, some across her forehead, and even above her lips. Some also spread to her shoulders and speckle the skin of her neck, you imagine they must extend up her arms, down her back, even up to her thighs. Which makes you imagine that even on the game day she applied that thing.

You remember thinking...They looked like grains of sand.

"Oh Gosh, you're beautiful." She opens her mouth, slightly pink now that there was no black lipstick, but then she closes it again, her ears completely red. "Why do you cover them?" You take a step closer and can't stop yourself from starting to count them, one, two, three, four. Oh, there were so many.

She is quiet for a moment as she shrugs as if it's no big deal. You think about the Coven again, did those shits really have the courage to look at that face and say she was too malleable? Too weak?

"When I was a kid a girl I liked and who I even dated for a while..." She begins as she crosses her arms under her chest in a protective gesture you already know well. "She...She said it made me look imbecile, some of her friends agreed and suddenly I was the 'scabies'." Your shoulders drop. It was easy to forget that Lilith Clawthorne, the sharp witch was once a nerd who suffered bullying. "But I didn't have the courage to remove them with a spell for perfect skin like some girls did. So I started using a concealer and the mockery stopped." You don't care who the girl is, you know you already hate her with all your heart. Who would have the courage to look at her like that and not say that she was simply beautiful? Simply perfect?

Who would have the courage to look at that cute little girl in that picture and say that she was anything but adorable?

You don't understand why your eyes are tearing up, you have to swallow as your instincts beg you to come closer. So you do.

There is only doubt in her eyes when you take her cheeks in both hands. She looks afraid of what you would say.

But you don't say immediately. You lean in so that you can kiss one cheek and then the other. Her eyes close with the contact of your mouth, her eyelashes fluttering slightly.

"You had a terrible taste in girls." You whisper next, which makes her genuinely laugh softly. "I think they're beautiful. You should let everyone see them." She looks with mild disbelief at you. "I mean that. They enhance your eyes and make your face look a lot less threatening." Your fingertips run through the little dots. Oh, you would spend a lifetime memorizing the place each one occupied on her face.

"Don't you think everyone will think it's weird?" You frown slightly at that.

"Think it's weird that you finally feel comfortable showing them who you really are?" She shrugs again, staring at the floor. "I think they will love it, Lilith, especially Eda. She'll love having her big sister back." A small smile begins to form on her mouth. It's a little odd to see her pink lips when you were so used to the black lipstick, but you love it. "I loved them if that's any encouragement." Lilith's smile widens and it's sheer surprise that takes your face when she simply wraps her arms around you, squeezing gently around your waist. She rests her face on your shoulder, completely leaning against you and you just frown slightly as you hold her by the shoulders.

"Thank you." She whispers then, her voice touching your cheek and making your whole body tremble.

You want to ask why. But you think you understand. 

You've seen all of her. The parts she liked, the parts she didn't. And you accepted every one of them. You were willing for each of them. You want to tell her that she really doesn't need to thank you for that.

Because that's what friends should do. That was just you being her friend. As a mate... As a mate, you intended to give her the world.

When did you think of that? Having someone who with one touch tears you apart, who with one word shatters you, who with a single different breath makes you reconsider what you're going to say.

It's just her. 

You sigh and stick your nose in her hair. 

No one will ever take you out of that embrace. No one will ever touch her again.

And when you promise yourself that, it feels like the thread finally loosens behind your back. 

You can breathe again, and you're sure of what you want.

Her.

You just want her.

Chapter 16

[meichenxi]

Hey, could I ask you how you do shadowing? Like the different ways you do it? You mentioned in your tag that shadowing is good and I'd love to hear how you do it! I do not attempt shadowing much so I don't really know what helps, etc. ToT (my studyblr is rigelmejo)

Hellooo! Thank you for the interesting question!

Tbh I think I do it fairly basically - I don’t use any particularly fancy software, but software like Language Learning with Netflix has certainly made it easier. There’s a whole video on how to get the most of it here: [on mobile, link didn't work - How to study Chinese with Netflix! by Chinese Zero To Hero] (I’d recommend checking out all of their videos actually, they’ve done a bunch of livestreams recently and they place a lot of emphasis on shadowing + the course they are trying to sell you is…actually phenomenally good)

(Also, I have to preface this by saying that I have been very lucky in terms of pronunciation: I learnt about 80% of my current vocabulary by ear without characters or pinyin. I have been in China for eight months in total, and while I didn’t speak Chinese for all of that, I was constantly soaking in info on natural sentence intonation. I still often don’t know officially what the tone of a vocabulary item is, especially if it changes tone like 教, 为 or 相, but I don’t get yelled at so I have definitely internalised a lot of those changes. I definitely would have more trouble with this if I hadn’t had that experience - my other areas are waaaay weaker because of this though- my reading SUCKS lmao and I can literally handwrite about ten characters)

Anyway. How I shadow:

1) Quite simply by playing the line, and repeating it with all the emotion it has!! I usually use Netflix or Viki for this. I try to do it as fast as possible, and if I can’t do the whole thing, I ‘chunk’ it: if I were doing the sentence 我们还不知道他会不会来, I would start from the end with 他会不会来, then 不知道他会不会来, and then the whole sentence. Notice that this isn’t breaking it down into words or even grammatical phrases, but intonational phrases: it would be perfectly sensible to just do 会不会来 without the 他 but realistically, since this is a question, it’s likely that a strong stress will be placed on the first 会, and you wouldn’t be able to replicate that without also included the more weakly stressed syllable before.

2) I locate (intentionally or subconsciously) the main locus of stress within the sentence, and I focus on that accordingly. Tones may become less extreme if they are not stressed, and may become more exaggerated if stressed. This is always a good exercise. I accompany this with physical actions - I throw my hands down, I sigh, I groan!

3) I put away the text, and don’t look at the tones or even my computer screen - more on this below.

4) Finally, when I think I’ve got it reasonably accurate, I’ll record them speaking the line into my phone with an appropriate pause for copying and play it back to myself at various points throughout the day.

5) I then go and find other words with the same tone contour to slot in, and copy it again. After that, I find words that are slightly different tonally and pop them in too.

6) I finally do fun things like hold a conversation with myself. This can be really simple phrases imbued with some kind of emotion - 这个女子到底是谁呀？为什么不认识我？应该是新手吧。You can do this either really informally, or very formally, or both - trying to speak in the latter way is very fun! So then it’d be idk something more like: 那位姑娘是何人，来自何处？This is fun because you can really slow down your speech and sound as elegant as you like!! (this will sound stilted if you do it for modern speech, but it’s a very fun exercise)

Choosing your media!!

1) Don’t use donghuas. Seriously. The voice actors usually speak at a ridiculous pace and not with the same range of ‘normal’ intonation

2) Your Chinese is definitely good enough to recognise when anyone is quoting poetry or speaking in a paricularly sexy literary way so, uh…don’t do that. That rules dramas like Nirvana in Fire OUT.

3) Modern dramas and reality TV shows CAN be great, but they can also be quite intimidatingly quick and almost too mushy at times. I’d recommend informal speech in guzhuang dramas more, because they have professional voice actors and extensive sound editing, meaning that although it might be fast and the vocabulary harder, it’s actually much more accessible and easier to copy. You don’t want to be stuck with the awfulness of 50% failed foreigner and 50% 12 year old boy who can’t enunciate properly!!

4) CHOOSE YOUR WEAPON WISELY. I try to find characters that speak in a dramatic, whiny or childish way. This is so important! There’s literally no use copying Lan Wangji unless you want to be able to have that particular cadence and tone of voice you get reciting poetry. Childish/whiny/dramatic characters on the other hand stress some words very strongly, and rush others together - this is great for hearing what actual real speech sounds like. Whininess wins. In The Untamed, characters like Wei Wuxian (not yllz!wwx but just…regular wwx), 一问三不知 Nie Huaisang, Jin Ling, and Jingyi are all great. Also Jiggy, who is just very extra constantly and speaks much slower as well, which really helps. In SHL characters like Gu Xiang are good.

5) CHOOSE YOUR VOICE WISELY! If you are really aiming to copy them 100% (which you should try at least sometimes), you want somebody with your pitch range to sound normal. I have a sort of party trick in Chinese that because I’ve spent so much time listening to women in guzhuang dramas I can change my voice and sound like a) a scheming concubine with honeyed words, or b) the voice of the Beijing metro. My teacher found it hysterically funny. But it’s not my natural voice, and if I speak like that for too long it hurts. The women usually are too high for me, and the big burly manly men too low - so I’d recommend finding a man with a higher voice, or an older woman (like some of the female characters in Nirvana in Fire). Again, sorry that this is mostly the Untamed (I’m just most familiar with it) but the voice actors for Wei Wuxian and some of the juniors (+jiggy) has a higher voice. Likewise Chengling in Word of Honour.

On intonation in general:

- The thing is that whilst shadowing is useful it requires prior ability in a whole bunch of other skills that you can train - it relies on your ability to accurately mimic pitch, emotion and other contrasts. Training this in ANY language, including your native one, will help your ability to do this in Chinese - so I’d recommend spending a fair amount of time practicing shadowing (or speaking just after somebody whilst listening to a string of text, like monolingual simultaneous interpreting) in your native language too. Any training copying accents or mimicking other people is going to similarly help, regardless of the language.

So, with that in mind, further tips:

1) Hum / try to copy the intonation without any words. What this does is force you to pay attention to what the intonation actually is, versus what you may think it should be.

2) Don’t look at the text! Do! Not! Look! At! The! Text! If you look at the characters or pinyin you’re telling yourself ‘ok this is a third tone here’ etc, but you want to override the part of your brain that has gotten into bad habits and is supremely self-confident in how you’re pronouncing the third tone, and actually just go straight back to mimicking.

3) Don’t be afraid to do it with vocabulary that is way beyond your level. Actually, I find this can sometimes be helpful, because you don’t have a prior idea about how a particular tone pair should be useful - and you don’t know which tone you should be producing.

4) Learn vocabulary by ear - listen to a vocab podcast or even make one yourself (I often do this; I record my daily Anki and listen back to it through headphones copying throughout the day - if you’re not confident in your pronunciation you can get Google Translate to do it). Similarly, pick unknown vocabulary out of a longer segment and remember it, trying to internalise the tones instead of figuring out which tone it is.

5) Find emotional sentences, and copy them with emotion. This is SO CRUCIAL!!! We remember things when we relate to them, and when we imbue them with emotion - and it also helps in hearing exactly how an angry second tone sounds, for instance.

6) When you’re copying, look up, and imagine you are having an actual conversation. Carry yourself with conviction and poise!! Really try to whine like wwx or slime like jgy. After a couple of turns copying them, try to turn off the audio and keep delivering it in the same manner.

7) Swap individual words out. Once you have a line properly figured out, swap a word or two that has a different tone pair, and focus on delivering it with the same pattern of stress.

8) Finally, practice doing this in your native language too!! It’s a skill that we don’t use often, and it can be trained. Some people are terrible at it at first go even in their native language, but you can work on it!

About intonation in general:

1) I think a lot of pronunciation problems with people sounding unnatural or stiff ultimately come down to a fundamental misunderstanding of what intonation looks like across different languages. In English we mark it by pitch: and we are so used to the rhetoric that Chinese has ‘tone’ and not ‘intonation’ that we try and focus on blindly copying every single word textbook perfect without listening to how it actually sounds.

2) Chinese does have intonation!!! Except that, unlike English, when you stress a word, the pitch doesn’t change, but the tone contour is exaggerated - basically the only time you will ever hear a full third tone is in isolated or very exaggerated speech. If you have a Chinese friend, get them to record a sentence like the English ‘I didn’t ask her to steal his rucksack’, and put stress on the different elements of it - I didn’t ask, I didn’t ask, I didn’t ask, and so on. Notice and copy how the tones change. When shadowing, you should always be paying attention to where the stress is in the sentence: when you speak by yourself, practicing saying a sentence neutrally, and then with stress on one component, the next, and so on. If it feels unnatural, it’s because you might not have practicised like this before - it’ll get better!

Hope that’s somewhat helpful / interesting!

- 梅晨曦

[dreamii-yume]

I've had an idea in my head for quite a while! What about Cater using you all he can for his birthday? You can't deny him either! You don't want to make the birthday boy sad, do you? He'd film everything as well! Threatening to upload it to Magicam if you don't do as he says.

- 🍑

Let’s start off with some spicy blackmail for our birthday boi~ (ง ื▿ ื)ว

“Oh~ That’s good pose, (Y/N)-chan! Look a little more to the right, here!”

Holding his phone in a horizontal manner, Cater tilted his upper body to get that perfect angle he wanted. You awkwardly shifted from your position, waiting for him to get a shot as you looked away in embarrassment. “Ah! Come on, don’t look away all shy like that~! It’s cute though, but it doesn’t feel right~” You flinched as you quickly went back to glance at the lens of his phone, your face blooming redder by the second.

“T-Take the shot already…” You barely mumbled out with your voice coming out a lot weaker than you would’ve wanted. You knew he was utilizing his time here, trying to savor the moment, but resulting in you becoming more and more humiliated by the second…I mean, how could you not? When this birthday boy just ordered you to go down on your knees right between his legs, and basically gave you the permission to jerk him off. It’s his own perverted way of a gift, yet you could only puff your cheeks at it.

Cater gave nothing but a chuckle. “Now, now…It takes time to get that perfection, Cupcake~” He taunted, his eyes sparkling at the sight of you through his phone screen. His responses seemed distracted, you figured it must be because he’s so lost on his own world right now. Well, of course he’s applying this much focus on you right now; The way you nervously hold his cock in your hands and letting it poke against your warm cheeks, it’s simply enticing. No matter which place he holds the camera at, each angle is just unbearably adorable that it’s just impossible to take one shot. “Hey, why don’t you stick out your tongue for me, Darling?”

You let out a slight whine, keeping your mouth shut into a straight line as a form of rejection, stubborn as you can be. Still, it wasn’t enough for Cater to rethink his choice, having your tongue out just above his cock would definitely increase your cuteness level! “Hm~? Is that a no?” He hummed in a mocking manner; it made your stomach churn in response. The feeling of regret bubbles in. “That’s too bad…I guess we can still go with a livestream then! What do you say? Let’s livestream this event on Magicam!”

You gulped. “I just can’t decide on a good shot, you see! Maybe if I let everyone see your current state, they’ll be able to help me? Cay-kun is quite popular, you see~!” He said with a cheerful smile, but his eyes look down on you with dark intentions, making you feel as if there’s a loaded gun right at the back of your skull. His fingers began to fiddle with his phone screen, filling you with dread especially when you can’t see which buttons he was pressing. What if he was already livestreaming all this time and you just haven’t realized…!? “Let’s title this with…”The Prefect of Night Raven College’s Adorable Birthday Gift to Cay-kun”! Then-“

With a huffing whimper and frustrated tears building up on the side of your eyes, you opened your quavering mouth and stuck out your tongue like he asked. Cater stopped with a victorious smirk on his face before laughing, you felt his cock twitched in your hand. “Aw, you poor thing~! Getting all flustered like that…” He said, reaching out to your face to wipe away those tiny tears, before studying your facial features. “Hm…So cute…”

He slipped his thumb on the side of your mouth, widening the gap before a truly smug smile followed right after. You widened your eyes with a squeak as he moved his cock right at the entrance “…Now, I want you to take this all in your mouth. All of it.” He smiled sweetly with a small giggle.

There’s nothing that you could really do here, your words are useless against him when he literally has the power to ruin you with a click of a button. Covering it up as a birthday gift didn’t really mean anything at all, he could’ve done this at a normal day and he’d still have that power. After much mental deliberation with yourself, you eventually moved to lean in closer and do as he say, opening your mouth wider to accommodate his girth. “Mm…That’s a good girl…” He said in a gentle whisper, moving his hand to pat your head as a form of motivation. His breath seems shaky, now that he’s feeling all sensitive with how warm you feel on the inside. “…You can move now.”

And so, you did, not having any other choice in the matter. Your actions were a bit clumsy, but you provided a warm and comforting feeling every time you bobbed your head to swallow him whole. The way your tongue would slide up and down his shaft, your saliva sticking to his skin like a protective layer. Cater couldn’t help but be amused as he noticed that you were actually learning fast, curiously exploring your options to deliver pleasure without even noticing it yourself. Cater was glad that he decided to secretly record this whole event, not to livestream or to post anywhere, but for himself to daydream again and again in the near future.

He let out a slight breathy chuckle and kept the fact for himself, however he would be lying if he said that he expected you to adapt this quickly. Honestly, your hands would automatically pump his dick slightly while you nibble and suck on his head, your hot breathing lingering against him was enough to stimulate him faster than he would’ve liked. Before Cater knew it, he just found himself to be the one moaning out loud as you fastened your pace. He mentally cursed as he just overestimated his endurance and his hand, which was sitting on top of your head, was beginning to add pressure to have you engulf him deeper and longer. “Nngh…(Y/N)-chan…You’re really good at this, huh…” He giggled, like an intoxicated individual, a drool slipped out on the side of his mouth in process. “More…Cay-kun wants more, (Y/N)-chan…!”

You heard him and to your surprise, your body was more than willing to grant his request as you felt a surge of motivation flowing in you and you began to suck him faster. Throwing his head back, Cater was unable to hold himself back anymore and with a euphoric smile, he gripped your head and pulled you out. His thick, white semen came bursting out of his slit like that of a firework and landing everywhere, mainly on you. You closed your eyes, feeling some liquid all over your face and mouth, eventually dripping down your cheeks like slime. “A-Ah…” You moaned slightly, slowly opening your eyes only to shut them off immediately as bright white flash suddenly slipped into your vision. Clearing your mind soon took the realization in you that after so long, Cater finally took that one perfect photo he wanted, and you weren’t even ready! You wondered how it look but seeing how your senior stares at his phone with that lovesick look on his face made you rethink otherwise.

Maybe that picture should really just be for his eyes.

“Aah~! This is perfect! It’s a completely stolen shot and you still look so cute!” He admired the photo, exhaustion doesn’t seem to have any effect on him even after his initial release, but trails of sweat drops down from his forehead. “Plus, my cum makes you look like you’re covered in whip cream instead! I guess pulling out was really the correct choice, good job me~!”

Squealing like a little girl, Cater finally took noticed of your pouting self and merely smiled brightly at you. “And good job to you too, (Y/N)-chan! You’re such a Sweetheart!” He said as leaned forward and pulled you into a bone-crushing hug. “You really made Cay-kun’s birthday so much fun! Thank you~!”

You averted your eyes to the side and gave him a twitching smile. “Uuh…Y-Yeah, whatever you say…” You said, paling at the thought that you actually wouldn’t have agreed to this if he hadn’t blackmailed you in the first place. The senior seemed to be too distracted with his own enthusiasm to notice your salty attitude, but you had an underlying that he does notice, he just doesn’t want to acknowledge it. You ended up sighing in depravity in the end whilst hugging him back, you quietly click your tongue as a plan to have your revenge later…When you’re sure that those pictures won’t accidentally fall to some shady website that is.

Cater melts a little long in your touch before forcing himself to pull away and flashed you a wide smile. “Well then, I’m expecting our date in that one super photogenic café this Saturday, yeah~?” He said as you looked back to him, blinking. “What kind of boyfriend would I be if I don’t take my girlfriend out somewhere nice?”

Then it hits you like a truck. “Wait…G-Girlfriend…!? Boyfriend!?”

With your panicking self, Cater tilted his head to the side, feigning innocence. “Hm~? That’s right. I mean, it’s just common sense for us to be in a proper relationship after doing that, you know?” He said with a shy blush, but still gave an evil smile in the end, making you gulp down a very bad feeling. Especially as proceeded he pulled out his phone with the recent picture of you covered in his seed, making you squeak in fear. “After all, you wouldn’t want this coming out so soon, right?”

“So, you better bet that we’re going to be stepping up a higher level than this, Sweetheart~!”

[dingdongitsbees]

BLACK-EYED SUSAN | LEVI X READER HUNGER GAMES AU

Chapter 13: Rinse and Repeat

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Tw: PTSD, implied suicidal ideation, alcoholism

WC: 5.4k Ao3 link Ask to be added to the taglist! It will be updated weekly on Saturdays

First person version can be found here

Master List

“Nothing ever ends poetically. It ends and we turn it into poetry. All that blood was never once beautiful, it was always just red.” – Kait Rokowski

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It had been a few years since your world had gotten simultaneously a million times better and also gone to shit. It hadn’t really hit you two until you had spent a few days back in the homes that had been provided for you. You each had your own house as per usual for victors, but you didn’t need a second. You had spent your life together in a borderline shack, it would feel weird to have the other sleep across the street. But it had been in that gifted house that it finally came crashing down.

All you could see was their faces, all you could feel was that knife in your hand, all you could hear was that goddamn canon. You were sitting on a velvet couch paid for in blood. Now having more than enough food on the table was exchanged for lives. Being able to still exist in the world meant twenty-two people had been ripped from the world.

Levi had been next to you, so he just held you, his shoulders shuddering just as bad as yours, and you cried. You just cried. There’s nothing you can do or say or think to make anything like that better. Only time can help, and to be honest it isn’t very good at its job.

The trip to each district took what was left out of you two. Combined you had killed tributes of five districts out of the other eleven. Almost fucking half. Most of their families just glared at you on their platforms as their child’s face was displayed behind them as you recited propaganda scripts.

District Ten was hard for you. They had surprised you to be honest, neither of Sasha’s nor Connie’s family looked at you with any disdain. All you could feel was pity radiating off of them, especially from Sasha’s father. She told you how he had taught her how to shoot, you almost deviated off script to say how you learnt vicariously through his daughter, how kind she and funny she was.

Connie’s siblings hurt to look at. They looked at you with such big eyes. They should have hated you, they really fucking should have. Their brother died in one of the most horrific ways possible yet they stared at you as if you were one of their sisters. The normal people in front of the stage only copied their looks, none of them hated you for taking away two souls. It didn’t make any fucking sense. It would have been better if they had just heckled you. Just yelled at you and screamed at you, taking the brunt of their words was the least you could do for exchanging your life for one their own.

District Eleven wasn’t so kind to Levi. Kaya’s family looked like they were two seconds from breaking on to the main stage and choking him to death right there. He might have let them. Niccolo’s family was confusing. There was obviously no forgiveness for how Levi killed their son, a wild animal in a spree of rage, but they didn’t look angry. Levi had told you he had just said a few words over Niccolo before coming back, maybe those words were enough remorse for them to not want his head on a spike.

However, the civilians in the crowd didn’t agree. They had to be restrained from climbing up, yelling threats and taunts, about how he could kill a little girl without a second glance, how he took pleasure in killing Niccolo. Levi kept his head down, his undercut blinding his view, but his hand shook in yours. You did the speech on behalf of the both of you.

The districts from Nine to Five didn’t give two shits about you, maybe only some had mild curiosity. Their glazed-over eyes just stared, clearly bored as you were from the fuckery spilling from your lips. Some of the families glared only because their child wasn’t standing up there instead of you, but you couldn’t blame them for that.

One was…weird to say the least. Neither of you had many interactions with either Annie or Bertolt, but you two lead them to their deaths. Levi may have killed Annie directly but Bertolt’s murder was just cruel, you knew that, but you had thrown that rock anyway. Both of their families just looked devoid of any emotion, the crowd didn’t seem to care, that’s One for you, but their parents just looked empty. The speech went smoothly.

Three was strange as well, you never met nor saw their girl, but Falco you certainly had, but you also hadn’t killed him, in reality your relationship him was positive. They didn’t seem to hate you, quite the opposite really, they seemed to be happy you were there. Three was no stranger to careers betraying and killing their tributes so they were probably just happy Reiner didn’t win and it had been because of your own hands. Still, it was strange. Falco’s older brother, the one you had seen in the reaping recording, had looked on the brink of tears but he stayed strong, his back straight and head up high. They probably wouldn’t have looked at you the same if Falco had gone with you. Someone would have needed to kill him at some point anyway, it just so happened it wasn’t you.

Two was painful. Instead of two separate families standing on their respective platforms it was just one. There was confliction in their eyes for sure, you were surprised they could even stand to be around each other, their sister or bother’s son killing their child. But they stood together. Staring at you with a mix of hate and affection. Levi had to do the speech that time.

Four was hard once again, but only because of one person, specifically Marcel’s younger brother. He flew daggers from his eyes, pure fury ran through his veins. He probably would have killed you both if he had the chance, probably would have been good at it too. You could only begin to imagine the anger he had stored up since you had sliced his brother’s throat.

You recognised him in the reaping for the next game.

He used his anger well.

At the end of the trip you had to go to the Capitol once again for the Presidents party. You nearly preferred the arena.

Floch was sweating buckets under Zeke’s gaze the entire time and drank himself into a stupor, avoiding you both at every turn which you were glad for. People reached for you like you were statues, brushing your hair and clothes and bodies like you were pets. Nick was the only thing stopping you from cursing everyone in the vicinity, Levi came close. Zeke watched from his balcony, eyes narrowed and sipping on champagne waiting for one of you to misstep so he could order a bullet into your heads.

When you got home you two didn’t know what to do. You both fucked around for a year, bought anything that caught your eyes at the hub no matter if it was an ugly piece of pottery or a toy. You bought a lot of liquor too and drank most in one go. The burning in your throats let you forget the inferno in your brains. A small price to pay for some peace and quiet between neurons.

You two were rarely sober for the first few months. You’d wake up and have whiskey for breakfast, you’d walk around town, maybe sneak through the fence, and have some gin, and if it was a particularly bad day you’d opt for tequila as your bedtime stories.

People in the streets knew to leave you alone, just to let you wallow a bit, they hadn’t seen many victors, but they could guess that starting up conversations with people on the knife’s edge was a good way to get punched. Hannes talked to you two occasionally, usually at the hub, cheering your bottles with his flask. He didn’t ask about the game, he saw enough anyway, he just pretended you were those troublemaker kids you had been when you left.

It was Hanji of all people that got you out of it, though she wasn’t one to talk when it came to the number of empty bottles in your living room, but she at least cut the number down a bit or swapped out the drinks for something weaker much to your slurred complaints.

The months after that were hard, letting the built-up trauma hit you like a train. You both started getting nightmares.

One of you would wake up already screaming or crying or be entirely frozen still and unable to move as their body quaked. The other would hold on to them until their tremors ceased and their breath evened again. Then you’d just rinse and repeat the next night.

Rinse and repeat.

Flinch at a raised voice, go numb at the sight of blood, start hyperventilating when you were sure you had seen another tribute in the crowd.

Try not to let yourself die.

Rinse and repeat.

Then the next game came around. You both offered to go as mentors, to let Hanji take a backseat from the role after her isolating years, she came to make sure you didn’t say something stupid, but she just got to hang around without much of a care.

The two kids that you got weren’t good. You knew the second that their names were called that they were goners. Wouldn’t make it in the bloodbath, and even if they ran, they probably wouldn’t live past the first day. You learnt to push their names away. It didn’t help any to hang on to them.

The kids weren’t dumb, they knew that too.

There was a little bit of hope when they looked at you however, a hope that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

Porco had sliced both of their throats open within the first minute. Porco won the title of victor in only three days with a kill count of eight. They never had a chance.

You think that was the last time you cried.

When mentors go to the Capitol and watch the feed, they sit in a room together connected to an ongoing party that never stops until the games do, infested with sponsors and government officials. Only mentors are allowed in that room, not even titan servants. You just needed a room to be in to be able to grieve only with people that understood.

They always looked after the new mentors, it didn’t matter the districts or even if their tribute killed yours, they’d hold you, get you a glass of water or usually something stronger, just let you get everything out and topped up makeup on your red rimmed eyes before you got ambushed by press outside the door. Sometimes the career districts were prickly, but only the ones that truly cared about the kids became mentors anyway, so they weren’t ones to give you shit.

It just sort of numbed you after that. You’re not sure if you could even remember all the kids you sent to their deaths. No, you definitely couldn’t, and you didn’t plan to.

Without fail every year they always got killed in the bloodbath, and every year without fail you’d drill into them to just run away, but they just wouldn’t listen, or the careers just didn’t let them leave. You both spent most of your time in the Capitol just flicking off the tops of third bottles and taking quiet bets on who was going to win or who’d kill who. Levi was always right.

It was actually Erwin’s idea to do something back at Twelve, to find something to pour yourselves into. So, after the 70th Hunger Games you went back and pushed your ludicrous amount of money to builders to create an orphanage. The one on your side of Twelve was shit and didn’t have the funding nor space, it was the reason you two had never gone to it yourselves, so you gave them some of your load too so they could get food on the table for once.

Kids started trickling in, you didn’t run the place yourselves, you didn’t have the emotional range to do something like that anymore and you’d probably do more harm than good as their caretakers, they didn’t need a pair of fucked up twenty-year-olds to lead them through life. But you visited, making sure everything was up to scratch and there was no complaints or concerns from the kids about the people you had employed or the quality of their beds and food or if they needed some more toys to play with.

Levi always made sure the place was meticulous, and it was kinda funny how he used cleaning as his way to bond with the kids. They always complained but they never said no when he asked for their help. You helped kids with schoolwork and funded whatever type of skill they wanted to learn.

“You wanna paint? Here’s an easel and some paints from the Capitol that my designer friend sent over.”

It was hard to smile but at least you could help them to.

One day, when you two had dropped in to visit before you went to stock up on vodka, a boy came up to you with big emerald eyes, with a black-haired girl trailing after him. He asked a question that got everyone surrounding you looking up from their sandwiches.

“Can you teach us how to fight?”

And so you did. Twelve had always been at a disadvantage, nothing in your district aided you for the Games, the closet you’d had was learning about mines and explosions or having the physical strength to lift a pickaxe but that was only available when you worked in the mineshafts at eighteen, the last year qualifying for the reaping, and eighteen-years-olds were never picked.

So usually any kid that went in was utterly fucked.

Unless you tried changing that.

You started small. Learning how to throw a proper punch or kick, things you had learnt on the streets stirring up trouble. How to balance yourself in a proper stance so a gust of wind or a shove from a career wouldn’t send you stumbling.

You taught them the things you learnt in the Capitol and in the training room; what foods were safe, how to set a trap, how to treat a wound, how to conduct an interview, how to form an alliance, who to avoid.

It was a long time before you held a blade again.

They had begged you for months to just teach them how to knife fight, but the idea still shook you. You hadn’t held a throwing knife in your hand for years, but it still melded uncomfortably comfortable into your palm. You could still throw it and hit it dead on centre. You knew if the throw was hard enough to go through someone’s skull. You knew how long it would take for their body to hit the ground if it were a clean shot, and how long it would take if it wasn’t. You knew how many milliseconds it would take for the canon to fire.

Picking up a knife again, only if to teach, was a torturous process, but you didn’t let them know that. You would just drink a little more that night.

“Eren keep your arms up! Try and copy Mikasa’s form!” you barked.

They all stood in a line, throwing knives into hay bales, some making it, most missing. Mikasa was unsurprisingly the former, Eren was unsurprisingly the latter. The two were always the hardest at work though it seemed it was usually driven by Eren’s ambition. The kid wasn’t gifted with natural talent but he was stubborn enough to try and make up for it. They had come to the orphanage after Mikasa’s parents were murdered over some debt they couldn’t pay and Eren lost his mum to a mine explosion and then his father caught something bad from his own patient.

It was always them begging you (well Eren at least, Mikasa would just ask nicely) for more lessons and whatever advice they could squeeze out of you. It frightened you a little, Eren’s enthusiasm, you had seen that face before.

It was an unspoken truth that they were your favourites of the bunch, the others didn’t take offence to it, it was just those two were always coming up to you two whenever they got the chance, though you were scared it was because they reminded you of an overconfident kid and the one trying to take care of them. You tried to pretend you didn’t see Gabi and Falco when you looked at them.

“I’m trying but my arm’s starting to feel heavy!” Eren said, not even bothering to turn his head.

“You brats don’t have time to get tired when you’re in there so just get used to it,” Levi replied.

He walked behind them, arms crossed as he analysed each of them, you tried not to make a joke that Eren and Mikasa were taller than him now. He muttered out tips to those who needed it, and compliments to those who deserved it, you had tried to get him to coddle them just a little bit but then he said overestimating yourself just gets your killed and you couldn’t say anything to that. When he got to the end of the line of kids, he wandered back over to you and you gave a crooked smile.

He bumped his shoulder into yours before turning around and standing next to you, you both falling into your usual silence as you just watched.

“There’s more of them than usual,” Levi noted and you nodded absentmindedly.

“It’s today, it makes them nervous.”

“Zeke never picks them though.”

That was true, when you had first started up the orphanage, you had expected Zeke to jump at the opportunity, there was no way he wasn’t privy to your every movement let alone something that required legal documents to be signed, so how he hadn’t rigged the reaping to pull one of your kids was honestly getting a little unnerving.

But each year a pair of kids were picked that you didn’t recognise, and you’d breathe a sigh of relief; it’s much easier to forget strangers.

You realised that the games were rigged at the 71st games, you had noticed that all the slips of paper you could see, even though they were folded in half, would all start with the same letter, it peeking out, and then the name called out would match. You asked Hanji afterwards, cause there was no way she hadn’t noticed, and she just laughed in your face.

“It’s a show, of course they choose their cast.”

You leant your head on his shoulder as you watched, he leant his head too. His arms untangled themselves from each other and he let one fall, letting his pinkie interlock with your waiting one. You both still being there was a constant surprise and an unspoken threat, because someday, when Zeke got tired, or you did something to piss him off, that fact might not be so true anymore.

But Levi’s there now, maybe not tomorrow, but today at least, and you could only hope that the trend remained.

“Cut it out dude!”

You both whipped your heads around, finding two kids wrestling on the ground. They panted as they tried to get the advantage, dust billowing around them as the other kids stared. Neither of you could be bothered to move. Eventually one straddled the other, pinning him to the dirt.

Levi’s pinkie tightened.

The boy on the ground whined while the other grinned in victory before joining his empty hands together and sending them down onto the boy’s chest.

Levi stiffened beneath you and alarm bells blared in your head.

The boy started pretending to stab him.

“Die! Die! Die!”

The kids around them laughed.

The boy beneath told him to stop.

Levi’s breath shortened.

You were at the kids in a second, pulling them off one another.

“That’s enough.”

They went silent, the boys looking down to the ground in shame, though they didn’t know why you were trying so hard not to glare.

“Time to pack up anyway, you guys need to get ready for the reaping,” you said, you were just greeted with whinges, “Put the knives in the tub you lot. Now.”

They instantly shut up, knowing that tone of yours was not to be messed with under any circumstances. They all shuffled off, throwing the knives in, you always counted them all in case one of them took one, but they were good kids.

Levi nodded at them as they filed back inside the building, jaw still tight. As soon as they were all gone, Eren and Mikasa waving goodbye at the end of the line, you sprinted back over, running your hands through his hair as you brought his face to your shoulder.

“Shh it’s okay it’s okay.”

A shudder whipped through him.

You kissed his temple. “You’re not in the arena, you’re in Twelve. I’m not about to die and neither are you. No one is dying and no one is going to. Just breathe, just focus on my voice and breathe.”

Eventually he stilled again, air flowing through his lungs like normal. It didn’t happen as much anymore, but it still happened. It probably didn’t help that he was about to meet two dead kids.

“Let’s go home, yeah?”

He nodded into your shoulder before finally raising his head, sliding over his façade again. You two of all people had to be the strong ones today, you couldn’t show fear, you weren’t allowed to anymore.

The walk home was silent, most people were inside or rushing home to get ready. You dropped past the hub quickly and you bought some bottles from your usual, Levi didn’t say a word, just stared into space. You passed the town square, the camera crews were nearly all set up, the barriers were getting placed. Hannes was testing the mic on the stage, he sent you a nod that you sent back.

The Victor’s village was always weird to see, after passing smog polluted houses with windows that are barely transparent anymore with walls that are starting to tilt, you come to a pristine gate. The separation pissed you off like it was saying you were better than them, but Nick would have your head if you even suggested taking it down. The houses were beautiful too. Maybe it was just an average house for a Capitol citizen, maybe a little nicer, but it looked like a goddamn king’s estate compared to everywhere else in Twelve.

People would say you deserved it, to have a nice home. It made you want to puke.

You could see Hanji through her window, lounging on a couch, bottle of whiskey in hand. Seemed like a plan.

You squeezed Levi’s hand as you unlocked the door and led him inside. You shed your jackets and shoes and put away your bottles, leaving one out. You glanced to him, he was still sort of out of it, he needed quietness, maybe a bath. Yeah a bath would do, those always calmed him down.

You trekked up the stairs, on the landing you let yourself take a little run up and slide across the wooden floorboards on your socks towards the bathroom door. Silly shit helped sometimes.

You reached out and grabbed the handle and turned it, pushing forward on the door. It let out an ungodly and far too familiar screech.

You gasped and slammed your back into the wall.

Fuck.

Your breath was getting quicker, not letting your lungs get enough oxygen before taking another gulp.

Fuck fuck fuck.

You crouched down, elbows on your knees as you pressed your palms into your eyes at a sad attempt to get your brain to stop.

You could only see him, or in more exact terms, you could only see his melted remains.

Fuck.

Rapid thumps came from the stairwell, you didn’t look up as arms enveloped you.

You let out a shaky breath. “I’m fine.”

He didn’t say anything, just kissed your head before holding you tighter. Your need to talk to communicate was even less than it used to be ever since the Games. There were things you two didn’t need to speak about, you just acted on, knowing exactly what to do.

Though there were moments you didn’t want to talk about, and you didn’t plan to talk about them either. He didn’t mention finding you sobbing on the bathroom floor surrounded by spilled sleeping pills and you didn’t mention waking up alone in bed and finding him completely out of it on the roof of the orphanage. You didn’t talk about it, but you held each other a little tighter just as you did both of those nights.

“I’ll get some oil for it when we get back,” Levi whispered.

You nodded into his chest.

“Bath?” he asked.

You nodded again.

.

Warm water has magical powers you swore, it really shouldn’t be able to make someone feel so good, to be able to relax and almost drift away forgetting about the possibility of drowning. What a lame way to go out, though it was much nicer than the ways you’d seen.

You laid on Levi’s chest as the water rippled around your little movements. He played with your pruned fingers, touching the fingertips with his own like it was an interactive museum exhibit. You watched, fascinated by his fascination, blinking slowly as the bath bled out all of your stress.

Moments like that were nice, but it had to be broken today. You couldn’t stay in that warm heaven forever, though it was quite tempting, you wouldn’t exactly be missing out on the adventure of a lifetime.

.

You ruffled the towel through your hair as you sipped the vodka. The burn and taste were barely noticeable, even the effect had begun to wear off or maybe you had just gotten better at being under the influence.

“Catch.”

You threw the bottle to Levi on the couch who caught it without a second glance, immediately taking a few gulps of it himself.

“Hello you two.”

You both looked to the door, sending tight smiles to your usual guest, though to be honest your home was hers and hers was yours at that point.

She walked behind Levi’s couch and took the bottle that he already had extended to her, taking a gulp before placing it on a side table.

“Ready to send children to die?”

.

The reaping went as usual. Hanji welcomed everyone to the 74th Hunger Games, two kids got reaped, one fifteen-year-old and one thirteen-year-old, you couldn’t remember which was which. You waited in the train, neither of them came up to talk to you and just ate up all the food they could before passing out on the nicest bed they would ever sleep in. You didn’t bother them, one look and you knew they were a lost cause.

The process went on.

Neither were that charismatic, they were only memorable because they were last and that was pushing it as is. They both got low scores, a four and a six. The thirteen-year-old cried himself to sleep the night before, or he might have, you wouldn’t know, you slept through it.

That morning you went up to the roof with them, got in the mentor’s hovercraft and just twiddled your thumbs, wondering who was going to win that year or what the arena was going to look like. You went in, sitting in the back of a cart, going through the maze of corridors beneath the grand stage, not bothering to focus in your eyes to see your surroundings. It was just grey walls anyway.

You yawned when you got to the centre, scratching the back of your neck as you tried to find your tributes amongst all of the shaking teenagers.

A finger tapped you on the shoulder. You spun around to see the girl from…Seven? She grinned, her eyes crinkling.

“I just wanted to say I think you’re really cool, I really admire what you and Levi did in your games.”

You blinked.

“Oh, is that so? Good luck then I guess.”

She smiled even wider before running off with a wave. You dragged a hand over your face before heading over to your tribute waiting for you.

It was a forest arena, nothing too special.

The games had long since started when you got back to main city of the Capitol and went into the sponsor party, both of you immediately beelined for the mentor room. You watched as replays showed one getting killed in the bloodbath the other getting hunted down by none other than the careers. You just stared at their slow-mo screaming faces and sighed.

You didn’t cry, you didn’t even blink. You did the first time but after that it’s just been shut away. Thankfully there was no new mentors that year, you didn’t have to deal with sobbing messes. You were too exhausted to care for someone anymore. Compassion doesn’t come cheap.

The mentor room was filled with pain as always, most were just trying to unlearn two names as quickly as possible, drowning their neurons in liquor so they could pretend that two faces weren’t burnt into their brains. It won’t be enough, it never is. You knew that too now.

Some of the others in the room weren’t mentors but they were victors all the same, having just grabbed a free trip to the Capitol so they could bum off some high-class booze. Couldn’t blame them. They were lucky though, the other districts, having more than three victors meant they had the option of just staying home and just ignoring the screen. They didn’t have to know the kids.

You two spent the rest of your time in silence, going back up to the penthouse to sleep before coming back, hoping the whole ordeal would be over soon.

The girl that talked to you before it started, a girl from Eight you had learned, was still alive though, and you couldn’t help but cheer for her a little bit. She started an alliance with a girl from Six, both doing well against the attempted threats on their lives by the careers. Soon they had made it to the last few with only a few scratches to show the world, much better than your leg to say the least. It still ached every once in a while.

But you were still surprised when her little duo alliance were the last ones left. Their mentors were on the edges of their seats, hands covering their noses and mouths like a prayer, eyes glued to the screen.

Then the girl from Eight did something fucking stupid, something that made everyone’s breath hitch around the country.

She brought out some poisonous berries. They had killed a career with them, not needing to get into a fight, but then they held grenades in the form of blueberries in their blood-stained hands.

They brought it to their mouths as the room cursed in unison, people rose from their seats, you could hear people yelling outside the door. They both hesitated for a second as they counted down but plopped them in their mouths anyway.

Two canons fired in quick succession.

The transmission was as silent as the room. No one knew what to do. You stared at the screen with two dead kids. There wasn’t going to be a victor. There wasn’t going to be a victor because they copied you.

“I really admire what you and Levi did in your games.”

Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck.

The room slowly turned to you two as your heart hammered in your chest, Levi’s hand fumbled for yours.

You were fucked. Completely and utterly fucked.

.

.

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a/n: sorry this chapter was late! this was mainly just summary but we’ll really get into it next chapter

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Taglist: (if you are bold i cannot tag you)

@queenofcurse @regalillegal @midaribaby @art-sparrow @lust-for-pan​ @hansolo1805​ @cloudy-island​ @uniquecookiealienshoe @captain-tch

[shepard-ram]

Let's go third ask of the day honestly plot bunnies are running rampant in my head today so let's do a second part to the Mulan ask.

Technoblade was starting to lose his patience how hard could it be to find the soldier that had won his affection? It turned out to be very hard since the nation in questions record keeping was appalling even months later he was no closer to finding them. If this continued the voices would drive him mad before he had even figured out what part of the army your armour even belonged to begin narrowing down his search which ya no he kind of had to do he couldn't just visit every single person on the conscription lists considering A he didn't actually see your face due to the standard issue helmet you had on and B you never spoke so he could even go off of Reginal accents. Seeing his eldests growing rage over this (and to be far he was starting to lose it as well since it's rather hard to fight wars without your best general or plan a wedding with one party missing) asked Wilbur to assist. Wilbur did arrive within the month but kept getting into arguments with his elder twin about why did they have to spend their time on this singular soldier even if they did injure Techno it's only when Techno quietly confesses the extent of his injuries and the fact that his piglin instincts had decided that you were the one to be his that Wilbur throw's his full weight behind solving the issue of finding this soldier (People often forget that they are twins by blood and that despite how human he looked and acted compared to his twin he had just as much piglin blood in him, he knew how much Techno's instincts declaring you as his mate really ment) and within a few weeks he had made more progress than Techno and the captive government did in the months that had being trying by using both the information on what part of the army the armour was from and cross-referencing that with information he had managed to get from Techno about the type sword that they used he had finally narrow down the search area enough so that Techno could find them in person. Wilbur had only just finished telling his brother this when he saw Techno rush of to the stable to grab both his horse Carl and his personal squad of soldiers on his quest to find you.

You were a hairs breath from a complete meltdown the Arctic Empire's bloodthirsty crown prince was going around the region fighting every soldier conscripted in the nations army to the death apparently he was looking for revenge against a soldier that injured him, who ever that was and there were only a few villages until he reached yours. You couldn't just grab your brother plus your friend and run not only was your brother to ill to make the journey but someone else had tried that and not only had the prince hunted down the runway soldier and kill him but he had wiped out the village as an example so no you couldn't run. A thought did enter you head you had beaten that general maybe you could pull off the same trick again no if you killed the prince they would just wipe your village off of the map in retaliation. As the days until the prince's arrival drew near you saw others saying goodbye to their loved ones and you saw your friend come to terms with their impending death you wanted to scream in rage at this prince's cruelty at his callousness towards a defeated people. You couldn't find your sword when the day came, your brother hobbled out of your house leaning heavily on his cane and your friend conversed with him while you searched for a sword to use in place of your own. Now however you could hear the names being read out, a pause, a clash, a scream and then repeat grabbing a training sword (better than nothing you supposed) after all your name would be soon. Stepping outside just as someone was cut down ( the bakers husband your mind supplied as you saw his corpse get dragged away by a soldier he had two small children you remembered you hoped that they hadn't witnessed their fathers death) sweat covered your palms as they worked their way down the list drawing ever closer to you name until they called your brother's name instead.

Why did they say your brother's name you were the one who went did they never update the conscription after you went in his place? You had to correct this,you had to stop them before they killed you brother due to a mistake you stepped forward to voice this only for a hand to quickly pull you back and cover your mouth preventing you from stopping your brother as he hobbled through the crowd with your sword in hand how,how long had he had that? You could hardly hear you friends apologies about how they and your brother refused to let you throw your life away when you had so much life left to live compared to them over your heartbeat echoing in your ears. Though when the prince loudly declared he would grant your brother a swift and painless death ( as if that was any comfort to those who loved him, to you) you thanked every god you could think of that your friend was physically weaker than you as you elbowed them in the gut and ripping your self free, charging through the crowd and raising your training sword to meet the blade about to crash down in your brother's head finally laying eyes on the prince only for you to recognise the general you left for dead instead.

Technoblade recognised the eyes currently meeting his with rage melting into fear once you recognised him in turn. He had finally found you after all this time, his eyes traveling over you face and body burning every detail into his mind. However one thought dominated his mind. Why did you charge out to face him now he had slew many unworthy opponents today? Why did this sickly mans imminent death cause you to stand and fight? What was he to you? It's only when your clash unfortunately ended him stumbling back as (for the first time he heard you voice after this it would never leave his head) you yelled at the man to run you called him brother, oh he couldn't kill him then, your loyalty to protecting those dear to you added to the list in his head of things that made you more than worthy as far as the voices and his instincts were concerned but also it was something he could now exploit. So he gave you an offer as you protectively stood in front of your brother come with him and nobody else has to die it was such a generous offer in his opinion after all if you refused he would have every villager killed and take you by force . He could see someone who had just pushed their way to the front of the crowd begging you not to ( the soldier that you had stopped him from cutting down when you first met the voices told him) but you looked at him trembling ( in fear or rage he couldn't tell) and told him that you accepted his offer. With barely contained joy he strode up to you as you discarded your weapon, and picked you up in a bridal carry as he went over to Carl and lifted you on to him before mounting up himself before riding out of the village his men falling into line behind him. That night as he held your sleeping for close in your shared tent (as if he would allow you to leave his sight now that he had finally found you) after sharing a meal with you ( though he had made sure to add a sleeping potion to your meal to help you sleep after such an eventful day) he just held you in his arms nuzzling the top of your head as he took in your scent burning it into his mind in a pure state of bliss as he finally had you and he could scarcely wait until you both returned to the capital to where his father had every ready for your wedding.

Ender-anon

This was not supposed to be this long my brain just took it and ran away with it before I could stop it.

He recognized you instantly, how could he not? Everything you do is so distinct, so perfect. You're so kind and bold and amazing- and now you're his, forever.

[justanotherlifeff]

Can I please have Iida with a reader who has a pass criminal record for assult even though it was self defense and the only reason she is at ua is because no other hero school wants her? She’s overall quiet and isn’t this “bad kid” people refer to her as , it was just a misunderstanding

Fickle threads

Warning: Mentions of bullying

Human emotions are like little threads that direct us like puppets. Or atleast, that's what you used to believe. The right pull of all emotions kept people going through their daily lives normally. The right amount of happiness, the right amount of fear and hatred. However, just a single thread snapping could turn your life outside down. It could change the course of the puppet and hence, the course of life. You of all people thought it won't happen to you but reality was always different from imagination.

Life was never fair to you. Being born with a so called "villaneous" quirk was bad enough already, however, the bullying that came with it made things far worse. You believed you could get through it all. That you could go to a hero school and become a hero to prove them all wrong. That your threads will last that long. However, years of being thrown around by your classmates, years of dreading to go to school every day made that seem more impossible each day. The threads weakened every time they threw dirt at your eyes or threw stones at you. Every time they cut your hair in the locker room or stole your clothes after gym class. One day, a few months before graduating middle school, a thread snapped.

The newspapers showed a girl who broke all the limbs of a fellow classmate. They didn't show the years of bullying that caused the sudden outburst. All your applications to hero schools got rejected due to your inability to follow rules and not use your quirk without legal permission. Yes, you had a criminal record now and your dreams were shattered infront of your eyes. Atleast until one application did not get rejected. Somehow, that application happened to be for the number 1 hero school in Japan, the only school that accepted you in their hero course despite your criminal record.

With your criminal record, came the rumours. Something that did not leave you alone even when you joined UA. Everywhere you went, you heard people talking about you in low voices. The threads you believed that you patched up were close to breaking yet again. What you did not expect was to be shown the kindness you always craved from a former bully, the type of people you hated the most.

It was your second year at UA when your life completely changed yet again. You were sitting in the cafeteria all alone as usual as you heard your classmates at class 2B talking behind your back. It was nothing new and you chose to ignore them till the new exchange student decided that bullying you would be a good idea. He stood up, walked up to you only to tell you that he knew what you did and you were an embarrassment to UA. Just as your threads were close to snapping, a harsh voice interjected, putting the bully in his place.

You looked up to see the person you least expected, the angry blonde from 2A, the one who used to openly bully Midoriya from his class. Before you were able to say anything, he grumbled, "Let's eat at the roof. These extras don't know what the fuck they are talking about." That day, an unlikely friendship formed, one between a bully turned good and a victim who lost control.

You learned later that he reached out his hand to help you because he was not able to do the same for Deku. Infact, he did the opposite. Like you, he was ridden with guilt, binded by the threads that made him more of a bad person than good. He understood you, the fact that you stood up for yourself and he believed that your bullies deserved what happened to them, that he deserved the same treatment. However, spending time with eachother made both of you realise that you were wrong to hurt someone that bad, even if they were a bully and that he had already atoned for his sins. You made eachother stronger while making those threads controlling you weaker.

With time, the friendship turned to love and with more time, you both broke free of the threads binding you. Bakugou accepted his past and finally had a decent relationship with Deku while you were accepted by people closer to him for your quirk and your past. You were not alone anymore. 'Humans are not puppets to be tied up and caged.' you believed now. You both were free to choose your lives.

[seancekitsch]

Powerplay: a Marko x Reader fic

part 3 of 3, previous part here

Warnings: harassment, vamp typical shit, cursing, death/killing, smut mentions, reference to the book

Marko was a good boyfriend, it turned out, except for when he wasn’t. You liked the sweet little kisses, the teasing way he snaps his jaw at you when you catch him staring, the way he holds you while you’re falling asleep even though he doesn’t have to.You like that he listens, more than your friends do. You rang another friend the other day, and were left waiting with the endless ringing again. You want to be upset, but they weren't as close as you were hoping they’d be. Your close friends were back in New York, three thousand miles and a year of working behind you. And they were Marko and his brothers now.

You love the way he keeps you safe, your protector being probably the deadliest thing you could encounter. You love the way he laughs, always joking and jovial. You always thought his smile hid a joke like some mystery, but now you're in on it too, and it's the funniest thing. There is no secret  joke, just Marko seeing the world with eyes full of humor. He sees the little things, and now he shows them to you. You love the way you can speak without speaking. Silence followed by heavy laughter, kisses, and understanding.

You even love that week you were on your period and every night he ate you out until you screamed yourself hoarse.

“Marko,” you’d say, “lets ride.”

And he would obey, letting you hop on the back of his bike, always after work, always too fast. You'd like to imagine him crashing as the wind whips your hair, stings your face. What that would be like, huh. It's what you assume he feels like when he flies, free and wild in the night. He caters to your every whim, makes you feel the happiest,  as long as the sun has set.

He was less a good boyfriend when he was hungry, brooding and refusing to get close to you. He would be irritable, pick fights, silent treatment. He would purposely leave you in silence, but he wouldn't ask for a taste, despite your offering. He respected you enough not to try that. Other times, he would make sure that you could hear every thought in his head. His thoughts sounded like shouts, always telling you to get the fuck away, always reminding you how vulnerable you were, how easy to kill you’d be. It's almost maddening. You never knew which nights he would be the silent ones, or which ones would be the loud ones.  

“Marko,” you’d say, “This is just temporary.”

You don't even have to think the words for him to know what you mean. Or those moments during the day when it's highlighted just how different he was, would always be. He would always be twenty and handsome and having fun, with a guaranteed group of friends. With a family he belonged with. You would always age, you would have to find something else to do eventually, and you would probably have to leave Santa Carla, because he wouldn't. You could always bore him, with Marko one day realizing you can't keep up anymore. You would always be weaker, and no matter how often Marko puts you first, he always holds the power. You’re only the decision maker because he lets you be. He could always take that power back. Find someone new when you get old and he stays the same age. He will always be this way, and you will always change.

It's those nights you think of pulling away from him, and you hope he never hears those thoughts. You love him, but he’ll always say it's not temporary. It's not true.

You love Marko today.

The jingling of the bell snaps you from your thoughts, head rising only to be face to face with one of the surf nazis. Huh, guess the boys didn’t clear all of them out. This one was tall, a skinhead with an upturned pug-like nose, wearing a lot of denim with eyes alight with mayhem in his agenda. Oh, please don’t fucking break anything.

“Hey Baby,” he sneers. God, his voice was even worse than his looks and his smell.

“Not your baby,” you deadpan, wishing desperately for him and his friends to leave without stealing or breaking anything forcing a sickeningly sweet customer service tone, “But what can I help with?”

Maybe good customer service will get them in-and-out quicker.

“That hot little body of yours could help me out,” his tone is outright mocking. God, is this how dudes like these think they can pull? You can’t even hide your grimace as you flinch at the words. If there was anyone else, just one other person working tonight, this wouldn’t be happening. You know this. Working nights alone practically invited this brand of harassment.

fuckfuckfuck. It’s way too early for Marko to be sniffing around, and if you can get them to leave the next four hours of your shift will be miserable. The man laughs, and it makes your blood run cold. He leans over the counter, past the little curtain of incense haze; breaching your only barrier of safety.

“I bet it could. Couldn’t it, baby?”

His large arms press against the glass of the counter and your eyes immediately flicker from them to the back room, where your knife is. He straightens up.

“Cat got your tongue?”

You frown, meeting his eyes now.

“Do you plan on buying anything we sell?” The Bauhaus record you have playing over the speaker skips, and you almost jump. It's just enough to break the tension, the rising bile in your throat clearing.

“I come in here for you, girlie,” and he affirms what you already know. Now that half of the surf nazis were gone, they were struggling to maintain their turf on the boardwalk. So harassment and torture at their hands were on the rise. Many people over the past few weeks had been dodging them in the stores around here, and now apparently they had caught wise to that. Done with it, you take a step back, leaning yourself against the back shelf to retreat further into the curtain of nag champa.

“You can fuck off,” you offer, gaining confidence as you realize the bong behind your head was more than affordable, and if you broke it over his head, you could cover it.

He opens his mouth to respond, but-

The bell on the door jingles again. A familiar smile fades into a scowl. Marko looks like one of those greek heroes tonight, maybe if only because his presence saves you from the gross comments (or anything worse) of the shaved head across the counter. He immediately distracts the surfer from you.

“Why don’t you get outta here, buddy? Me and the lady were just discussing me trying her out later,” the man spits, and you almost gag at the mental image of that.

Marko laughs, that high pitched full body laugh you love so much.

“That’s funny, buddy,” He throws the man’s nickname back at him, “Cause that’s my old lady right there.”

You loved and hated when he called you that. Technically, you are a year older than the year he turned. The first time you all realized that, Paul gave himself a stomach ache laughing over the ‘older woman’ Marko brought home. Tonight though, the nickname brings the biggest smile to your lips.

“Damn right I am,” you chime in, “and you couldn’t take the hint.”

Marko seals the deal by striding over to where you are and pulling you into a kiss over the counter. It doesn't take much more for the surf nazi to leave, the jingling of the door opening announcing his departure.

“I’m gonna make sure we kill the rest of them before the week is out.”

He waits the three hours it takes for you to be able to lock up behind the counter with you, loosely holding your hips and following you around, only moving away from you to pick out new records when one ends. 

Come over tonight, Marko thinks, and you know it isn't a suggestion. You kiss him hard on the mouth, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him to press against you. His arms automatically find themselves around your waist, squeezing you as he eagerly returns the kiss. This wouldn’t be your first time at their dilapidated hotel, with sprawling caves and chandeliers and beautiful spray painted murals on the walls. The first time you were there, he brought you there while the others were hunting. He fucked you on any surface not covered with knick knacks they'd collected or takeout containers, leaving you to sheepishly blush while he proudly talked to the others when they returned, deep red hickies and a bite mark on your collarbone you couldn't hide. The next time, the boys and Star and Laddie welcomed you in with booze and a feast and a fun night where you had to crawl out of the cave at dawn looking like a mess. Either way, he waits for you to agree before he leads you to his motorcycle.

“Star, Why don't you just become one of us already?” Paul whined, holding his half eaten eggroll like a cigar, “You're already living with us, Mama. We just want to be friends forever.”

She scrunches her nose, smoothing the long hair of Laddie’s head in her lap. The boy was tired, their unofficial little brother or not, he was still an eight year old.

“Or maybe,” David starts, dropping down from the rim of the check in counter of the hotel, “Star can just have some fun with them and we don’t even have to do what Max wants.”

The boys all laugh, Dwayne’s shoulders turning inward, while Paul smacks Marko in the chest behind you. Whoever Max was, he was someone that could give the boys orders; something you didnt think possible besides their own little group hierarchy. You'd figured out pretty quickly that David was the leader, Marko was his right hand, Dwayne was the left hand; with Marko enforcing, playful and impulsive, and Dwayne being the level head, logical and the one who often kept the boys from fighting and made them all remember why they loved each other so much. Paul was the baby. Both literally and figuratively. He was the messiest, the most likely to slip up;. He was also the one turned last. So when Star decides to be one of them, she’ll be the new baby. Then Laddie.

“No,” Star affirms, “No, I can’t do that to Michael.”

“Michael,” David tests the name on his lips, tongue darting out to lick them after he says it. The curly haired brunette on the boardwalk had a name. Then his eyes flick to you. There's a sharpness to them that feels so different from Marko’s. David is trying to stare through you, not to look inside of your head, to look past it, to see any weakness. A challenge.

“Who’s Max?” you speak up from your spot on Marko’s lap. You can feel him tense under you, but David smiles.

“You don't know about Max? Marko, you didn’t tell her about Max?”

Marko’s hand wraps around your wrist as David continues.

“Max knows all about you, y/n. There’s a reason you're here.”

Here as in, still alive in a vampire den, or here tonight specifically?

Mind thing? You think, and Marko leans his head down against your shoulder as he nods.

“So he knows Marko and I are X-men? Is he Professor X?”

You hear Dwayne and Paul chuckle from the other side of the circle, and Dwayne mutters, “Yeah something like that,” as he swats his hand at Paul’s mesh-covered chest.

“He sired us,” David clarifies.

“You feel it right?” changing the subject, “You feel like you need to be near Marko?”

Marko squeezes your wrist in encouragement, and you nod.

“He’s my boyfriend.”

“That's not what I mean.”

You know what he means. It's the way you feel Marko before you see him, the way you can never sneak up on him.

You nod again.

“That’s what Max wanted to know. Marko, do you wanna tell her, or should I?”

What does he mean? You think and the man below you perks up.

Come with me. His palms grip your hips and gently push you to stand, and he follows suit before taking the lead.

He leads you towards the mouth of the cave, where you enter and away from any listening ears.

“So you know how David is dating Star?” he asks, voice low and close to you in the shadows.

“If that’s what they’re doing,” you joke, and he laughs along with you.

“Well, he thought they had what we have, and that's why she’s with us.” He reaches for your hands to hold them, dropping any playfulness from before.

“I’m supposed to turn you, Max thinks. He’s a lot older than us, and he says some vampires have mates or something similar to that. Others they have some deep mental connection with. The guys… we can hear each other sometimes if we try hard, because we’re a pack. I don't have to try with you and that's why Max thinks it's different.”

Turn you? Like, capital T- Turn you? Into one of them? If he turned you, you’d never see the sun again; never feel its warmth. You’d have to drink blood, and human blood at that. You’d become a killer, and you’d have to keep killing. While you aren’t innocent, killing kind of seems like it would be a stretch for you. Some of their victims had to be innocent, but would your hunger corrupt your morals one day?

It's like he can see the wheels turning in your head, ability to hear your thoughts or not.

“Y/n, you don't have to. Fuck, this was dumb to bring up. David thought you were ready, but if you don't want to I won't make you…” He trails off, visibly a little more deflated.

But if you did, you would be on the same level as Marko. All of the insecurities you have about your relationship would just… stop existing. Your relationship’s expiration date would disappear, your fears about having to leave him or him leaving you would disappear. You'd have people and a place to belong and lover and guaranteed group of friends to be a new family.

“How does it work, Marko?” your voice surprises him, and in honesty, he brought you to the mouth of the cave to give you an out. If you wanted to leave here, leave him specifically, he was going to let you.

“You gotta drink, uh, vampire blood.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

You shrug.

“Are you sure? There's no take backs for this,” Marko’s voice is stern, unlike you ever heard it before.

Deadly sure, Marko.

He smiles, slowly like the moon rising in the night before it crescendos into the wide toothy grin you're so used to seeing.

Marko leads you back into the den of the cave where the others are hanging out.

Dwayne is the first to approach the two of you.

“Everything okay?”

You nod thankfully, offering him a smile.

Paul swoops in next.

“You better be tellin’ me you're joining the fam, chica!”

He tries to drape his arm around your shoulder, but Marko pushes him away playfully, both of the boys smiling.

“Let’s get this girl a drink!” Marko shouts, and the guys start up hollering and laughing.

Marko leads you back to where you had originally been sitting, his designated folding chair. He gestures to you to sit down, while he looks to David for something. Over his shoulder, you can see Star frowning as she watches on.

“Glad you got to talk it out,” David remarks as he hands a bottle of wine to Marko. Maybe you’ll be able to get used to his mannerisms in half a century. Marko hands off the bottle of wine to you, and your hands dip with the weight of it.

The wine bottle is bejeweled, another do it yourself project that the guys seem to love so much. It's heavy in your hands, dark and unseeing down the neck of it, but full. Marko crouches down between your legs, palms flat against your thighs as everyone waits with bated breath. You uncork the bottle, noticing the dark red staining on the cork, and knowing exactly what’s in it now. Two shaky hands bring the bottle to your lips, tilting your head back as you let the contents flow into your mouth, filling it. The ‘wine’ is thick, warm and salty but feels like it's already intoxicating you from just being in your mouth.

“That’s all Marko’s blood, you know,” David remarks, and you swallow deeply. All Marko. He drained his blood for you, weakened himself for you. Your eyes flicker to him, and he smiles up at you from his spot between your legs.

You smile back at him, widely, teeth stained with blood.

[demonicheadcanons]

What the Demon Brothers Are Like When Sick

AN: MC is gender-neutral as always. Some of these skirt the line between being platonic and romantic - I wasn’t sure if I wanted to keep things platonic so that more people could enjoy this, or if I should write as if you’re already in a relationship with the brothers, so its a bit of a mess. I hope you enjoy ^^

 Lucifer

If you’re not close, you won’t see him. He’s going to hole himself up in his room for a day to get better as quickly as possible. Also he feels like getting ill can be seen as a weakness, so he’d prefer for people not to see him whilst he’s in that state.

He gets sick often enough - he works hard for long hours and doesn’t get much sleep. However he’s also good at just, pretending he isn’t? His focus may be a little off, and he might be quiet or more lenient towards the other brothers because he doesn’t have the energy to scold them for hours on end, but these will be the only signs something isn’t right.

If you are close, he’ll still be wary about letting you know. Again, he doesn’t want to be seen as weak; it’d hurt his pride.

On top of this, he also worries that it might be contagious, and humans are much weaker than demons - if he’s struggling with something, it would absolutely outright kill a human. If its a disease that a human can get, his door is locked and you’re not getting near him no matter what.

Note: he is the only brother other than Satan that even considers this, and so if any of the brothers are sick in a way that could be contagious for humans, it’s him setting boundaries so that you won’t get sick.

When he does trust you enough, he’ll insist on laying with his head in your lap. He’ll tell you that having you run your fingers through his hair helps relieve the headache - it’s partially the truth, at least.

Enjoys being taken care of for once, instead of having to take care of others, but the chances of him admitting it are low. He’s self-sufficient and he doesn’t need anyone to look after him. But it’s still nice, and he’ll completely melt and stop putting up any defence if you kiss him, even if its on the cheek or forehead. He doesn’t feel like he has to fight things that make him happy right now.

Hold a glass of water or a cup of tea up for him and he’ll look straight at you as he sips at it, examining your expression and making sure you’re alright. If you seem to be stressed or upset, he’ll make you leave or cuddle up to him.

Won’t let you do any work for him - he’s a perfectionist and doesn’t trust anyone except Diavolo and maybe Barbatos to work to the same standards as him (*cough* and maybe Satan, if he’s really inspired). However, when he’s recovering and can work again, he’ll ask for your company; you can sit beside him, sit in his lap, even just lay in his bed whilst he works at his desk. Whatever you prefer. All that matters is that he has you nearby.

Will take you out to dinner or shopping as a thank you for helping him.

Mammon

If you’re not close (which, to be honest, would only happen if you don’t like him, because he likes anyone who’s nice to him) then you’ll see him complaining in the group chat and that’s... pretty much it. Sticks to his room until he’s better if he doesn’t feel like you’d take care of him.

If you are close, you can bet he’ll blow up your phone with calls and messages to come look after him for a bit, or to bring him this and that - water, painkillers, blankets, pillows, wipes so he feels less gross. Anything at all that can make him feel better, and that will make you have to stop by his room.

Mostly he just wants someone around because he feels lonely often anyway, but it gets unbearable when he’s ill. Before you were around, he’d push himself to keep going about his day so that he wouldn’t have to be alone.

Run a hand through his hair and help gently wipe his face and he’ll melt. He’s bright red and insistent that he doesn’t need some stupid human’s help, but he’ll shut up quickly if you continue to pat his head or hold his hand.

“Fine. Since you’re so desperate to be around The Great Mammon, I guess I’ll let you stay.” Yeah no, his grip is so tight on your hand that you’re not getting away anyway.

Recovers surprisingly quickly, and doesn’t get sick that often. However, he will insist that he’s better before he actually is, because he gets bored laying about doing nothing - he’s a busy guy, he has money to make and so on. You’ll have to force him to stay in bed for a bit longer even when he’s absolutely sure he’s better, because he really isn’t.

This will stop happening if you give him a lot of attention when he’s sick - he’s a sucker for affection. Cuddle up to him and he’ll stay in bed for as long as you think he should to get better. Honestly it isn’t even fully necessary - he hates seeing you upset or worried, so if you plead for him to take better care of himself he might actually consider trying.

Delirious rambling is common for him. He’ll be half asleep and look up at you and just tell you anything that comes to mind. This is as open as he gets about his feelings, and he might complain to you or tell you about this thing he saw when he was out that kind of reminded him of you, or about that one time when Lucifer did something embarrassing when they were still angels. Despite being too loose-lipped to keep short-term secrets, he’s not a gossip and so this is the only time he’ll tell you about any of the other brother’s personal matters. Please don’t tattle on him - he really was just out of it and didn’t mean to do anything bad.

He cries easily normally, and it gets worse when he’s sick - if you’re watching shows with him whilst he recovers, he’s going to be blubbering over anything even slightly sad or happy. Make sure you have a box of tissues and some treats that won’t make him feel too sick to cheer him up.

He’s going to ask for help with catching up on school work when he’s better, but he’ll repay you in any way you ask him so long as it doesn’t involve much grimm being spent. Maths tutoring is a big one - he hates doing work, but he’s really good at maths canonically. Essentially, if you’ll do his other subjects for him, he’ll do your maths homework for you. You’ll probably end up doing more work, but you get to spend even more time for him if that makes up for anything?

Additional note: Mammon is the only brother who Lucifer will give you time off school to take care of. This is because he knows Mammon won’t want to be alone and will probably stress out so much that he’ll end up worse off. It means he has a way of monitoring Mammon without having to be around him, and he doesn’t have to worry. This won’t be the reason he gives you - he’ll act like its a problem that you’re missing classes and will imply that he’s only just barely allowing it, but will give you permission at the end of the day because “well, it will keep him out of my hair at least.”

 Leviathan

Like Mammon, if you’re not close you just won’t hear from him. He can get quite irritable when he’s sick, and holes himself up in his room so he doesn’t have to deal with anyone. Honestly no one will know he’s sick unless he misses school and Lucifer orders someone to check up on him, because nothing much changes except that he messages the group chat less.

He acts a bit like Belphie when he’s sick, and sleeps through most of it cuddled up to his Ruri-Chan body pillow, with TSL on in the background as a grounding comfort.

He doesn’t get sick often. His immune system isn’t the best, because he never goes out. At the same time, because he tends to avoid people anyway, the likelihood of him catching anything is low.

If you are close, not much will be different - you’ll have to seek him out to notice he’s sick, or he’ll tell you in the context of asking you to set a show to record or go to a store for a special promotion involving something he’s interested in. He doesn’t really look for any comfort, but the closer you two are, the more upset he’ll be because now he knows what its like to be close to someone and it makes him miss it.

Won’t initiate anything, but he’s less flustered about physical affection because he’s just so tired. He still blushes when you so much as hug him, but he won’t protest or put himself down, he just holds on as tight as he can manage and nuzzles as close to you as possible. He likes sitting like that for as long as you’re comfortable.

He’s disturbingly quiet compared to when he’s healthy. He can tolerate headaches because he’s used to them from staring at screens constantly, but the second he has a fever or feels nauseous he’s silent. You can try to prompt him but he’ll get out a small amount of info and then just, pout and frown off into the distance because he doesn’t feel good and he hates it. He prefers for you to talk to him at these times, in a calm and level enough voice - especially if you talk about something that you’re very passionate about.

Levi is bad at taking care of himself at the best of times, but when he’s sick he’s surprisingly obedient. If you ask him to drink some water or try and eat something, he will. He needs the reminders but once they’re there he’ll follow them pretty well. Without them he’s going to spend the entire time in his bathtub bed. If he’s really, really sick, he’s going to take out all the pillows and fill it with water and he’ll sleep off the sickness in his demon form with his head underwater. He’ll only do this if left alone, though.

If you sit or lay beside him when he’s laying down, he’ll alternate between holding your hands and playing with them. He’s too tired to be nervous and it really calms him down. If you remind him when he’s better he’s going to turn bright red and stammer out something about how “of course you wouldn’t want a gross otaku like me to hold your hand.” However, the memories, as fuzzy as they may be, make him happy and if you two are napping together even when he’s not sick any more, he’ll still play with your hands once he believes you’re asleep.

Once he’s better, he’ll catch up on schoolwork quickly be himself - he wants to get it out of the way as soon as possible so that he can catch up on all the shows and games he missed. You won’t see him for a day or two as he catches up on everything unless you ask to spend time with him, and he gets really flustered and happy because you already spent a lot of time together and you still want to be around him?

Overall, he’s pretty self-sufficient compared to most of the other brothers, because he’s used to spending time by himself and being sick doesn’t completely uproot his life. Alongside Lucifer, he’s also the most likely to get you a gift to thank you for sticking by him. If you were looking for anything, he’ll have ordered it before starting to catch up on his school work.

Note: He’s silent almost the entire time he’s sick, but at least once a day for as long as it lasts he’ll open his eyes and stare up at you and groggily mumble about if you could please feed Henry, the fish flakes are over on his desk, thanks. Also, you’ll hear him all you by your actual name the most when he’s sick because he forgets to call you a normie.

 Satan

If you’re not close, like with the others you really just won’t hear from him. He’s going to be following whatever advice he found in books to get better as quickly as possible, or he’ll buy a potion if there’s one that will help. If nothing is helping, he’s going to be confined to his room because he’s in a constant bad mood and doesn’t have a good handle on his anger.

Even if you are close, he’ll ask to be left alone whilst he’s recovering because he knows he might snap and say or do something that he’ll regret. The only time he’ll willingly let you be around him is if he knows he isn’t contagious, and if he’s too weak to do anything. Its a rarity like no other, because it involves so much trust in both you and himself. If you force yourself into his room and insist on taking care of him anyway, he’s not going to say a word because he’ll be too focused on keeping himself under control.

He essentially becomes like a cat that is constantly fighting the urge to claw at your hands. Be slow and gentle around him, and keep your voice low. If you can get close enough to pat his head or let him curl up with his head in your lap, then you’re safe. However, if you’re loud or knock over his books he will quite literally growl at you, teeth-bared, and you’re going to want to get out of the room as soon as possible.

Once you manage to get close to him, keep a hand on his head and read quietly to him and he’ll pass out pretty quickly. He prefers for you to read fairy tales at times like this over anything else.

If you’re like this and another brother is loud outside of the room or bursts into the room he’s going to be furious. He’ll grip your wrist - possibly tight enough that it’ll leave a faint bruise - to keep you in place and glare at them until they back off, or just glare at the door until the noise stops. You’re pretty much trapped with him unless you can somehow figure out how to get up without waking him up, and if he wakes up and you’re gone you’re going to be hard-pressed trying to get him to let you get close again.

He’s going to be embarrassed once he recovers, and it really is best just to not bring any of it up again. After the first time he gets sick, he will seek you out if you were able to get close and you took good care of him - he’ll text you to bring water and painkillers to his room because he’s sick, and after that he’ll ask you to read to him again. He seems more normal each time, but make no mistake - if anyone else tries to be around him they won’t get away unscathed.

Satan really goes from one of the most reasonable brothers to acting very much like a demon, or like some kind of animal fighting to appear human.

When he’s better, he’ll thank you for helping him. If you don’t seem to be scared of him even after seeing him in that state, he’ll stick a little closer to you in future. He doesn’t try to repay you in any specific way, but he will help you out in little ways over time. If you don’t help him whilst he’s sick, he’s going to be understanding, but if you decided to help him and then ended up afraid of him he’ll be frustrated because he warned you and you ignored it.

 Asmodeus

Unless you really seem to not like him, he’s going to act similar whether you two are close or not; he’s complaining in the groupchat about being sick and about how awful his screen feels right now and so on. This will continue until you either take it upon yourself to go take care of him, or Lucifer sets up a rota where everyone has to go spend some time with him so Asmo will stop blowing up his phone.

Asmo doesn’t seem to change much when he’s sick, but he’ll have moments where he lays quietly and stares up at the ceiling because he’s overthinking something or he feels alone and hates it. He needs to be distracted constantly - paint his nails, or help him wash and moisturise his face, or tell him whatever silly stuff his brothers have been up to lately and he’ll brighten up a bit.

If he’s sweaty or feels like he looks even slightly less beautiful than normal, he’ll try to hide his face beneath a pillow at times because if you’re going to think about him, he’d rather not have you remember what he looks like right now, even if he’s still the most attractive person in the three realms. Enough compliments will draw him out but he may make a few inappropriate remarks in response.

Overall he acts similar to how he normally is, with a little more complaining and a slight cut down on his more suggestive comments. He’ll want to be pampered and taken care of and will make his wants known, but once you’re there with him he’s able to stay calm about the entire thing unless it goes on for too long and he feels like it’s going to take time and effort to get himself looking as good as he usually does again.

If you’re very close, and he’s realising that he has genuine feelings, then he’s going to have brief periods where he’s vert soft with you - he’ll ask you to lay down beside him and he’ll hold your face in his hands and whisper to you, being honest about how he feels and telling you what he likes about you, and asking you questions about yourself and about how you feel about him. He gets a little teary-eyed at these times because he’s really happy that you’re there with him even when he’s not in top shape.

The absolutely worst with food when he’s sick. He’s picky and he’ll turn his nose up at almost everything. If it has a smell it’s making him nauseous, but if it doesn’t have any taste at all he’s going to refuse to eat it because if he wanted his food to be bland he’d go ask Solomon to cook for him. Asmo is most at risk of making himself more sick by only eating sweeter foods because they’re all he can tolerate.

He’s a healthy person generally - he takes good care of himself, it’s a huge priority of his. He doesn’t get sick often but he takes longer to recover than most of the other brothers, and it really frustrates him.

Overall, just stay close to him and help him take care of himself in whatever way you can and he’ll be alright. This is probably the safest time to be around him, because he’s not in the mood to try anything when one of the participating parties is sick, whether it be you or him. When he gets better, though, he’s going to be very suggestive for a while because he insists he’s running on a deficit and needs attention.

He won’t necessarily reward you or thank you directly for helping him - I mean, you got to spend all that extra time around him, and that was a treat in and of itself even if he was sick the entire time - but he’ll invite you over for face masks and will paint your nails and offer to give you a nice massage. Essentially, whatever you’re down to do, he’s also down for once he’s better and is able to have a nice bath and fully wash away all traces of the illness.

 Beelzebub

If you’re not close, you’ll know he’s sick because there’s suddenly a lot more food around than there was before with him not around to eat it, and Belphie is complaining about how his stomach hurts because Beel is sick. Beel, himself, will stick to only complaining to Belphie in their room, or he’ll ask Lucifer to find a way to help him feel better. Whilst doctors will be called for all brothers if their condition seems serious, its incredibly likely that one will be called for Beel immediately no matter what.

If you are close, you’re going to be stuck by his side the entire time he’s unwell unless you really have something to do and Belphie agrees to spend the time with Beel instead. He really doesn’t want to be alone, and he’ll cling to anyone who comes near him. If you’re uncomfortable with physical affection you’d be best avoiding him whilst he’s sick.

Otherwise, Beel will wrap you up in his arms and cuddle with you, holding you as close as he can. He’s going to be wary of not hurting you, and he’s essentially a furnace when he’s not well so he’ll release his grip slightly if you seem to be overheating (Belphie sets up a fan so it stops being as much of a problem, thankfully). If he’s really sick and can’t focus, you’ll have to remind him if he’s holding you too tight or you’re starting to overheat because he won’t stop himself from holding you as close as physically possible and essentially wrapping himself around you like a koala bear.

Beel isn’t one for words irregardless of how he’s feeling, but you can hear him making a quiet whining noise in his throat every now and then if you listen carefully - when he’s really distressed, the sound is near constant and sounds like flies buzzing. Being sick is one of the worst things ever to him, and he can never get used to it because it’s such an uncommon state for him. He’s a healthy guy generally, as he’s sporty and active and takes good care of himself. He’s usually fairly immune to most illnesses.

Nothing really makes him feel that much better except for you to stay close by. He appreciates small gestures - gentle kisses on his cheeks or hands, words of comfort, and humming to him will calm him down enough that he might be able to sleep it off.

One good day of rest and he’ll be back on his feet, better than ever and ready to eat everything in the kitchen. If you cook for him or with him? He’s in love. Even if you don’t, he’s still going to insist that he has at least one arm around you at all times, and if you’re comfortable with it he’ll probably take to carrying you around with him half the time when he’s recovering - its his own way of saying thank you and that he appreciates what you do for him.

He won’t do anything special otherwise to thank you. However, because he and Belphie both tend to get sick at the same time, if you tend to both of them he’ll definitely try to repay you in some way. Usually this just involves giving you some kind of snack when he’s filling up again. If he knows there’s something you really like to eat, he’ll sneak out when you’re sleeping and get some for the two of you, as well as something for Belphie.

 Belphegor

If you’re not close you’ll still know he’s sick because he’ll be trying to help Beel feel better first before he focuses on himself, and he’ll be grumbling the whole time. He’s angry and he’s not going to put up with anything, and the second Beel’s asleep he’s not leaving their room, or he’s locking himself up in the attic and sleeping until he’s better. No one except Beel and Lucifer dares to go near him when he’s like this - even then, Lucifer only checks up on him if he really needs something, or to make sure Belphie is okay because he’s the youngest brother and Luci very occasionally babies him.

If you are close, much like Beel you’re going to have to avoid him if you don’t want to spend the next few days cuddled up with him. He tends to be sick for longer, and if you’re not careful he’ll try to get you to spend the entire time in the attic, wrapped up in his arms.

He’s the only one who will end up in his demon form for the majority of the time he’s ill even if you’re around, for a variety of reasons; he doesn’t have the energy to maintain his more human-like form, he’s too frustrated and doesn’t care enough, etc. Also he finds it comforting to wrap his tail around you in some way if you’re okay with it so you won’t leave when he’s napping.

Belphie won’t admit to it, but the worst thing you can do when he’s sick is leave and not be back before he wakes up. Similarly to Satan, it upsets him to the point where he’ll get angry and refuse to let you back into the room, but he can be convinced fairly easily or bribed with the offer of letting him sleep with his head in your lap, with you running your hands through his hair.

As mentioned before for Beel, the two often get sick at the same time. Belphegor will be less clingy if you’re also taking care of Beel, and ten times more grateful. He won’t let you go for anything, but the second you mention that you need to check up on Beel too he’s already released his grip and he’s grumbling about how you better come back as soon as possible.

When he gets better, he doesn’t really see a need to thank you or anything - not because he’s ungrateful, but because you two are close and he’d take care of you if you were sick too. He sees it as a normal and expected thing. If he was snappy with you, he’ll apologise indirectly, but otherwise he doesn’t say anything about it. If you did end up taking care of both him and Beel he’ll pat you on the head and probably offer to let you rest with your head in his lap for once.

AN: Thanks for reading! If its highly requested I’ll do this for the Undateables too. In the meantime, I plan to write about how the brothers take care of MC when they’re sick.

[sevlgi]

the special one

requested: yes

group: mamamoo

pairing: moonbyul x fem!reader

genre: fluff, angst

contents: vampire!moonbyul, bartender!reader

warnings: blood, weapons, vampires

synopsis: Moonbyul was always used to getting her way. So encountering an entire bar warned against her powers, and led by a surprisingly feisty human, wasn’t exactly on her bucket list.

a/n: lowkey wanted to wait for byul’s birthday to post this but i couldn’t wait :D enjoy!!

word count: 3.3k

As soon as she stepped into the bar, Byulyi could smell the thing she had been craving for the past month. Well, two things: blood, and some good alcohol.

She paid no mind to the hands grabbing at her as she slid through the crowd, skillfully evading being pulled into a dance circle by a group of admittedly pretty girls. Sure, they were easy targets for feeding, but there needed to be some alcohol in her system before she dealt with horny foreigners.

“A bottle of your finest soju, please.”

She smiled at the waiter who turned around, a girl probably barely 20 years old. A perfect target, then- someone who didn’t know the kinds of creatures that frequented the darker bars of Seoul.

It wasn’t even an egotistical thing to say that no one had been able to resist the allure of Byulyi’s gaze for centuries, and she never expected an almost teenaged girl to be the one to break that record. To her surprise, the kid looked down instantly, voice sounding odd as she polished the glass in her hands. “One second, ma’am.”

Pursing her crimson-stained lips, the vampire checked her clothing for the unlikely chance of bloodstains on the black fabric. Maybe it was the dark smeared eye makeup? But usually, all her looks did was draw more people in, even without using the power behind her eyes...

“Another one of you, eh?”

When her eyes shifted over to the staff door that the boy had entered, she found a defiant gaze, eyebrows cocked and hip jutting to one side. Unlike the earlier bartender, you stared right into her eyes without a change to your expression, no lust or euphoria seeping into cold irises. “I’m sorry, you are?” Byulyi asked, sending you a small smile. 

You remained unimpressed, flinging a dishrag onto the bar counter as you slammed your hands down onto the stone and leaned in closer. In close proximity, you were interestingly beautiful, the lack of sympathy attractive in some twisted way. “Y/N. Manager, and a strong hater of you vampires. See yourself out.”

The short-haired woman shrugged, leaning back in the barstool and crossing her arms. “I don’t think I will, manager. Tell me, did you train the kid how to recognize people like me?”

Taking a good look at the points of Byulyi’s nails and the glint to her teeth, you evidently decided not to fight her, gritting your teeth instead as you matched her stance. “Ryujin’s smart. She isn’t as strong as me, maybe, but she knows enough to not be caught in your trap.”

Every word spat out of your mouth sounds like a barbed and poisoned insult aimed right at the vampire’s heart, but they make no impact on stone skin. Still smiling, Byulyi waved a hand at the alcohol littering the bar. “Well, since you know not to fight me, how about that soju?”

You bristled at being ordered to do something, but set an ice-cold bottle of the soju down on the counter. “The most expensive in the house,” you hissed, shoving it over at her. “And you’re going to have to pay. No one else is coming to serve you tonight, now that I know what you are.”

“See you soon, manager,” she saluted, cracking the soju open with a simple flick of her wrist. Even if nothing else resulted from the night, she’d found another first.

You were going to be the first person that Byulyi won over by herself, without the influence of any powers whatsoever. And yes, she would win you over somehow. Eventually.

At first, Byulyi had been confused by the vendetta you seemed to have against vampires. It was true that she didn’t fit in with the clan system that most vampires in the city (or world) tended to adopt, but she didn’t think that anyone could be bad enough to make you quite so wary.

And it just so happened that the next time she dared to visit your bar, you were dealing with the difficult ones.

“I told you that we don’t allow vamps for a reason,” you scowled, eyes flicking between those of the five girls who stood with their arms crossed before you. “I may not be able to control you, but I sure as hell won’t let you feed on innocents.”

Irene exchanged a glance with Joy, who was just about to step forward when another voice interrupted the conversation. “Hey. Are you giving the manager trouble?”

You glared at Byulyi as well, though there wasn’t the venom that you directed at the clan. “Rogue. You’re going against us?” Seulgi asked, head cocked to a side. “Isn’t it in your best interest too to get rid of this... human?”

Strolling forward with her hands in the pockets of her pants, Byulyi sighed. “Look, manager here is stronger than you think. And if I want to remain in her best interests, be able to come to this bar sometimes, I’ll do what she asks. Including throwing you out.”

Despite the numbers of the clan, there was no possible way any of the five could match up to Byulyi’s sheer experience. She wasn’t violent compared to some, but she could certainly hold her own in a fight. You were silent behind the bar, but the stare you directed at the clan spoke volumes.

“Fine,” Yeri rolled her eyes, lips pinching together. “Come on. Survive another day, right?”

As they filed out of the bar, Byulyi’s eyes remained on them until the door swung shut. “You didn’t have to do that,” you said with your back turned, hands scrubbing at a bottle for no reason.

“Don’t worry, it was fun,” she grinned, sliding onto the barstool. “Is this why you dislike us vamps? Not all of us are like them, you know.”

You turned just to send her a half-hearted glare. “No, that’s not why. I always- I never liked you undead things, and being immune to your powers doesn’t help anything. But hoity-toity ones like them make it worse.”

The vampire leaned her chin on her hand, watching you work. The reddish glare of the bar’s lights only made the column of your throat look more inviting, but Byulyi wasn’t reckless enough to attack someone capable of resisting her. Besides, you were an interesting one. “I see. Well, if anyone tries to mess with you again, you call me,” she jested, smiling wider when you scoffed.

“Sure.” But contrasting your cold words, you slid a bottle of soju over to her, the same flavor that she’d liked best the last time. “On the house this time. But I don’t owe you anything after this,” you warned.

“Come on, a bottle of soju isn’t enough,” Byulyi pouted, laughing when you scrunched your nose. “You owe me a favor. I’m responsible, promise, I won’t ask for your blood or anything.”

You hesitated before agreeing, but finally allowed her to shake your hand. “Fine. A favor- geez, your hands are cold.”

She stared down at the pale skin once you had jerked away, a slight warmth from your human hands lingering. “I guess. I mean, I’m dead, what do you expect?”

“Dead, huh?” You almost look sympathetic for once, pouring out some soju for the both of you. “What’s that like?”

Byulyi raised an eyebrow as she clinked her glass against yours. “Being dead? Well, I don’t remember that. But now, it’s similar to being alive. My heart still beats, if that’s what you’re wondering. That’s what makes it hard for people to realize that we aren’t human too.”

“It still beats?” you frowned, scrunching your entire face at the taste of alcohol burning the back of your throat. “I always hear differently.”

She reached out for your hand, holding on loosely when you allowed her to hold it. “Come on, feel.”

You exhaled sharply when you felt the pounding at the pulsepoint of Byulyi’s neck, leaning in closer as if that’d allow you to hear it, too. When you looked down, though, you realized the position you were in. “If anyone looked at us, they’d think I was the vampire.”

“You’re right, aren’t you?” she smiled, only tilting her head more to expose her neck to you. “You could kill me right now.”

“Aren’t you already dead?” You bent down under the counter to hide the heat in your cheeks, your fingertips icy just from a couple seconds of contact. “How would I kill you?”

The vampire shrugged, “Wooden stake works on the weaker ones. Holy water, if you had any, but that one takes a lot to kill. For us older ones, the only thing that works is a sacred bullet; hard to come by for you humans, which is why you don’t know about it.”

Frowning, you looked over from the vault of good alcohol stored under the bar. “Huh. What else is fake?”

Byulyi scrunched her nose, looking remarkably like a cute and harmless hamster in a slightly bloodstained black outfit when she did. She was almost charming when she pondered your question, tapping blunt fingernails against her chin. “The mirror thing is, my friend Yongsun spends hours staring at herself. So’s the garlic allergy. I like garlic.”

“Good to know,” you chuckled when you stood up again. “Enjoy your soju, Byulyi  .”

She ghosted her own hands over your fingerprints marring the frosted glass of the alcohol bottle, bringing the entire thing to her lips. “I will.”

Seulgi’s grip was iron tight as she pulled your head back by your hair, your wrists straining against the duct tape holding them together as your scalp screamed. “I’ll ask you again. Where is she?”

Ryujin’s eyes were nothing short of terrified over the tape clamping over her mouth, but you remained firm with your chin jutting out. “I. Don’t. Know. I don’t serve vampires, and I don’t protect them.”

Scoffing, Irene scraped a fingernail against your cheek, the skin tearing under the serrated tip. “Don’t lie. She saved you from us last time, and Byulyi doesn’t risk her rogue status for just anyone.”

Glancing up at the ceiling, or the floor of your actual bar, Wendy mused, “I wonder if she’d hear you scream. If you mean so much to her, what would she give to save you?”

You sighed, going limp just to shake your head. “I told you. Byulyi protected me out of spite against you, not because she gives a shit about me. And I won’t scream. You can kill me in peace, as soon as you--”

Crashing into Wendy, the door to the basement slammed open with a kick from the very person you claimed to not give a shit about you. Byulyi finally looked like the vampire you feared her to be from the start, dark eyes ablaze with something that quite honestly frightened you. Her dark clothing swirled around her in the dusty air, pale brown hair glinting gold as her own nails cut the bonds holding Ryujin. “Go.”

She ran as told, too fast for Yeri’s claws to grasp onto the hem of her work jacket. “So it worked,” Joy smiled, cocking the slightly rusty pistol in her hand. Sacred bullet, you remembered, struggling more against your bonds when you realized what that bullet could do to the vampire glaring daggers at her opponents. “Stupid of you.”

In a sudden burst of strength, the duct tape ripped and you surged up, feeling at least a couple locks of hair remain in Seulgi’s fist. But in that rush, you tackled the tallest girl in the room, all breath knocked out of your lungs at the impact.

Scrambling for the gun, you screamed out at the feeling of sharp points sinking into your arm, hand faltering. “Let go--”

A harsh crack sounded by your ear when Byulyi’s foot stomped down on Joy’s ribs, her fangs pulling out just as your fingers closed around the gun. You panted as you twisted, blood dripping from your arm onto your face as you pressed the stone cold barrel into the girl’s pretty face. “Stand up,” you breathed, hands shaking as she eyed you. “Stand.”

The other four in her clan circled around you; despite the fact that you had no clue whatsoever about how to handle the weapon in your hands, you hoped that the fierce expression on your face was enough to convince them. Byulyi’s hand was surprisingly gentle on your shoulder, as was the expression on her face when she smiled at you. “Well. I believe you know what the blessed bullet in this gun does, and I’m sure you know better than to fight me on this.”

Irene hissed, fangs glistening under the dim lighting of the basement, “You don’t have Yongsun with you right now. What makes you think we can’t kill you, and your pretty human girlfriend too?”

Byulyi’s lips curved up in a smile as the cocking of another gun sounded by the basement door, Ryujin’s brow furrowed as she aimed. “Unlike this one, which I bet you only loaded one bullet into, that pistol over there has 4 bullets, straight from the hands of a priest,” the vampire explained with her hands behind her back. “More than enough to kill all of you, if I don’t get to you first.”

Yeri was already tugging at the wrist of Wendy, who stared futilely at the gun still pressed into Joy’s neck. Finally, Seulgi spoke up with a wavering voice, Irene not bothering to dispute as she asked, “What do you want? Money?”

“I want you to stay away from this bar, and with it, Y/N,” Byulyi gestured, deep voice smooth as she turned to you, sending a greasy wink that you rolled your eyes at. “And I’ll be telling all the other clans about this... incident. Sound fair?”

You breathed out a shallow sigh of relief when Irene nodded tentatively. “Good. Then get out, and don’t expect the pistol back,” you warned, waving Ryujin to get out of the stairway. “I don’t ever want to see your faces again.”

“I can’t thank you enough.”

Byulyi shrugged, clinking sojus with a grin on her face. She looked positively delighted, though she wasn’t the one with bite marks on her arm and a scrape on her cheekbone. “No need to. It was fun.”

“Fun?” you scoffed, downing the alcohol. “I wouldn’t call it that. But seriously, what do you want in return? That’s two favors I owe you now.”

“Is it?” she blinked. “I wasn’t keeping track.”

Looking out over the bar, you smiled at the sight of a vampire-free crowd, customers downing Ryujin’s specialty drinks as music boomed in LED speakers. “Yeah. Two favors. You better think fast, vampy.”

“There is one thing in mind.”

You raised an eyebrow and looked back over, head tilting when you realized that Byulyi wasn’t staring back like she usually did. “Yeah? What’s up?”

She cleared her throat suddenly, though you were sure that alcohol didn’t burn her like it did you. “I don’t want to use the favors for this, since I think that’d be immoral, but I... I want to be closer to you.”

Flicking your hand in the air between the two of you, you clarified, “What’s that mean? You wanna be friends? You wanna sit closer to me? Or sex--”

“No!” She held her hands out in front of her; to your satisfaction, you were sure that she’d be blushing if she was capable of it. “I may feel something for you. Not sexual, but something that I haven’t felt in a while. If I can, I’d like to use both my favors to call you my... girlfriend. Is that the term you use these days?”

“A girlfriend?” you laughed, shaking your head as you leaned forward in your chair. “That’s great and all, but you’ve barely known me for a month.”

Despite being a (not-so) human being, Byulyi visibly deflated. Without realizing it, your hand shot out and settled on her knee, thumb caressing the rough material of her jeans. “Okay. Then how about this: I will be your girlfriend. But it’ll be probational, like our alliance. As soon as you do something to piss me off, which I’m sure will be soon, I’ll decide if it’ll continue.”

She grinned, nose scrunching up as she offered you a toast. “Sounds perfect to me.”

The clink of the glass bottles was the chime of bells ringing in a new chapter, clear over the drunk energies of the night. Not wedding bells, of course- that wouldn’t happen for a good hundred more years. 

[maplecornia]

chapter 24

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 2.94K

𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: romance | slice of life | fluff | angst | bts x female!reader | ot7

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: things are getting heavyyy

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: cliffhangers | angst | fluff | slight mentions of self hatred | depression | mental health illness | self harm | occurs in the year 2024 | set in a timeline where BTS went to the military together | slight language

tags: @kookaine | @fangirl125reader | @kookiebbyxx | @taradevonne | @rae-bear |@mangminnie | @pixiekooo

If you're still enough, you can hear the inner whispers of your heart.

Have you noticed?

You're able to hear everything you have kept locked away. It tries to break through the cage, and you can feel the chains growing weaker and weaker with each passing moment. Each tick of the clock drawing closer and closer to the moment where you can no longer hold it in.

Where you finally break down.

Taehyung sighs and leans back in his chair, the meeting room now empty and dark. It's hard to believe that at the break of day it was filled with conflict and torn decisions.

-

"I'm against it."

At the sound of Yoongi's sharp dismissal, it's as though the room wakes up. Some in protest, some in shock. Suga raises his brow at the reaction, almost scoffing when he sees it.

"It's too much of a risk." He sighs almost in contempt. "If you want her so badly, why not sign her with Source or Pledis? They're our shareholders for a reason. Plus, since we're all under HYBE it will be exactly like she were a BigHit affiliation. Given the way this industry runs, however, she's probably best out of Kpop and should be signed under HYBE America. After all, she is a foreigner."

Though they are harsh, his words make sense. This would be the most logical approach rather than breaking their ban on female trainees. They made the ban for a reason, Yoongi doesn't understand why they would throw that away for someone who is slightly talented.

Besides, what about every other talented girl before her?

What reason should she have to achieve the dream which they were denied?

"I have to agree with Yoongi," Jin speaks up, his brow furrowed in concentration. "She has a unique and beautiful voice, that much is true. It'd be a shame to let it go, but if you think about it, we wouldn't be letting it go. Giving it to another company under HYBE might provide a better chance for her in the industry."

Taehyung bites his lip, not liking where this is going.

Jin glances around the table, hesitating before he says his next piece.

"We just got back, can we trust that they'll accept us if we do this? Next thing you know there'll be rumors of a scandal."

Though it was all on their minds, it still hurts to hear it out loud.

Can they trust ARMY to be there for them this time?

"It is a bit concerning. She'll be the only female trainee in an all-male company. Can you imagine the rumors? The field day Dispatch would have? She'd be hated before she even had a chance to show them her worth." Jhope murmurs under his breath, his eyes sparkling with deep worry.

They've all faced that. The fear of being hated for just being you. For existing without the mask.

"But I liked her," Jimin says, leaning forward. Though his words are simple, they are said with the most sincerity. "She's someone you hardly ever see, her voice stays with you, it doesn't leave. It's the kind that people can't get enough of. That's something special...shouldn't we take that into account?"

Biting his inner cheek, Taehyung glances up at BangPD, wondering if he knows. Did Jungkook tell him? He knew about Yen, why wouldn't he have found out about him as well?

If only he hadn't saved that recording. If only he hadn't been so careless, then none of this would have happened.

Somehow he feels as though those moments are being stolen from him.

"Jimin has a point, Yoongi. Did you hear her?" Jin speaks up, his gaze glazing over as though he were looking into the distance. Or recalling a long forgotten memory. Yoongi scoffs and smirks bitterly.

"Of course I did, I have ears."

"Are you sure?" Jin mutters in response, but it's almost as though Yoongi can't hear him.

"Think of this realistically, you have to know there's zero to no chance of her making it. Even if she's talented." There's a moment of uncomfortable silence at his words, words which no one wanted themselves to say. Sighing, Suga gestures towards Namjoon.

"Come on, Joon back me up here."

The room turns to Namjoon, waiting to hear his response.

He stays silent for a moment, his hand resting on his chin as he ponders the situation, his deep eyes calculating moves and countermoves. Possible situation and solutions.

All while trying to forget that the possible trainee is Yen.

Biting his bottom lip, he can't help but remember the way she was in the studio. How her eyes lit up with unimaginable love and devotion. A look only a fellow artist would be able to recognize. She was made for this, he can tell. She yearns to sing, to be lost in music, enveloped in a world of her own making. To be able to share that with others.

Looking over at BangPD, he narrows his eyes thoughtfully.

"What are you planning to do?"

Yoongi's eyes widen at Namjoon’s question, and he leans back, looking to BangPD's response. Bang Sihyuk smiles softly, almost as though he expected this.

For some reason, that look irks Taehyung.

Don’t think you can control us. We weren’t made for your chessboard.

"It will be on a purely trial basis. I am planning to sign her as a trainee, but the public will not know about it until I am sure that she will be a good addition." He looks towards Suga, pointedly directing his next statement towards him. "I understand your concerns for her. After all, she would be our first female trainee for a while."

Suga bites his inner cheek in protest, leaning back in his chair and brooding.

"However, I have been planning this for a while now." The room goes silent with the revelation as they turn to him, waiting for him to reveal more. "Ever since you've left for the military, I've been thinking of possible trainees to recruit for a new girl group. The first girl group to be officially under BigHit entertainment. They would be managed, produced, and signed underneath our label. Not through a loophole like BE:LIFT, Source Music, or Pledis. This would be ours and ours alone."

Jimin shakes his head in confusion. "Why now? What changed?"

BangPD sighs, his careful eyes scanning the room in a calm and collected manner.

"I don't know entirely myself." He rubs his face before continuing, playing with the portfolio of Yen. "I thought it was time to expand our horizons, to try something new...I guess you could say I was inspired."

He glances towards Namjoon, and Joon can't help but remember that day all those years ago.

The day when BangPD proposed a plan, an inspiration to him, not quite unlike this one.

Namjoon’s brow furrowed in concentration, he turns to your smiling photo, still spread across the table.

Was it you?

Were you the reason for this inspiration?

"In any case, before I moved any further, I wanted to see if things would work out with her. One trainee. I didn't want to make a mistake like last time, hence the trial period." Bang Sihyuk continues, swaying a bit in his chair.

"Who would train her?" Taehyung mutters underneath his breath, unable to look away from your photo this whole time. Turning to BangPD, his eyes are aflame with conviction. "If we have our normal staff take part in her training, we won't be able to control who else could find out. If her existence were to be completely secret, who could we trust?"

It's a valid question, but Taehyung doesn't like the glint Sihyuk gets in his eyes at the notion. Silently, he wishes he never spoke up. Maybe then he would've been able to stay under the radar, and BangPD would never have to suspect he had any affiliation with the girl.

With Yen.

"You would."

Two words is all it takes.

Two words and the room is in an uproar.

"What are you talking about?! We have enough on our plate with our comeback, and now you expect us to train a girl who shouldn't even be here in the first place?!" Yoongi is so outraged that he stands, his chair rolling back into the wall.

"Yoongi, calm down--" RM begins, but Suga isn't willing to listen to anyone at the moment.

"Do you have any idea how much pressure we're under? And now you want to add an inexperienced trainee to our list of burdens just because she can sing?!" he snarls, his lip curling in disgust, his eyes dark with anger.

"Yoongi-hyung, you heard her voice. You have to admit that we found something here." Jungkook speaks up, meekly. Taehyung narrows his eyes his way.

Just what does Jungkook get out of all this? Taehyung knows he has to be the one who gave BangPD the file of your voice. He was the only other one there, besides Taehyung. Taehyung himself couldn’t bring himself to give you the flash drive, but Jungkook didn’t even think to tell you. He went straight to BangPD as though this were his decision to make. Did he even think of asking you what you thought?

What’s your angle?

Yoongi rolls his eyes, gesturing to the portfolio on the table.

"Yeah, we found something. But not something worth risking everything we built over!"

"Don't you think you're being a dramatic? We aren't even sure if this will work out. It's just a trial, and it's the best option for us to train them given the situation." Namjoon murmurs, rationally. Suga's eyes flame with defiance at the rebuttal and slams his hand on the table.

"And what happens if word gets out before we're ready?"

The room goes silent with the ultimatum, and they all avoid his gaze.

"What happens when we're the cause of her downfall?"

Glancing at each other, they ponder the question. A question that has weighed heavily on them ever since they debuted, ever since they became the star in the public's eye. Ever since the world knew about the boy group...

BTS.

Scowling, Yoongi pulls away.

"I don't know about the rest of you, but I don't have time for this. I have work to do, work that has been waiting for us for 2 years! Or did you all forget our promise?" When they don't answer him, he scoffs, pulling his backpack on his shoulder and walking out the door. "I'll see you at practice."

There's a moment of silence as soon as Yoongi leaves, silence uncomfortable and pressing. Licking his lips in nervous anticipation, Hoseok looks at the rest of them, almost unsure.

"Is he going to be okay?"

BangPD leans forward, folding his hands on the table.

"Don't worry about Yoongi, I'll talk to him later. But what about the rest of you?"

His quick, analytical eyes scan the table, hovering over every one of them. Almost as if he were trying to predict what exactly they would say next.

"Do you agree?"

-

Now, Taehyung grits his teeth. His grip tightening around the water bottle he was playing with in his hands, he throws it across the wall. As he watches it crumble at the force, he finds the ruin in his mind easing. Water drips off of the wall, and he feels a sort of sadistic satisfaction at the sight of destruction.

Now he’s not the only one broken.

But once that fades, he's left once more with his memories and his regret.

"Dammit." He groans, dropping his face in his hands hopelessly.

-

Standing, Tae grabs Jungkook by the hand before he can follow the rest of them out. The door shuts behind them, leaving only him and Jungkook in the meeting room, an uneasy silence hanging over them. With words they need to say, questions waiting to be answered.

"Taeh--" Jungkook begins, but in his rush, Tae interrupts him.

"Were you there?"

The silence that blossoms between them grows to a deafening roar as Jungkook gently pulls away from Taehyung's firm hold. It creates a bitter but necessary distance between the two of them. It lets them know that they're different, that what happened back then was something that belonged to one as much as it did the other.

"You heard her too, didn't you?" Jungkook murmurs, his words turning Taehyung's blood cold. Smiling softly, Jungkook runs his hands through his hair. "I saw you as you were leaving, you were the one who recorded her, aren't you?"

Biting his bottom lip, Tae can't answer. Even though he knows that moment wasn't his, even though he knows that his ideas of fate and chance have been destroyed, he's unable to admit to it. He can't find it in him to voice the fact that he was there, that he gave birth to her chance, and he wanted it to be his and his alone.

Jungkook chuckles nervously at the silence before speaking once more.

"I wonder...why didn't you have the same idea as me?"

-

His hands tangled up in the locks of his hair, Taehyung stares at the slick wooden table, his heart in knots and his mind jumbled.

"Why didn't I?" he mutters to himself, a soft whisper that lingers empty on the air. "Why couldn't I say anything?"

Pulling away from the table, where Yen's future was decided this morning, he swallows hard. By the end of the day, he found himself lingering around this room, the studio, anyplace that reminded him of her.

Laughing bitterly, he rubs his forehead.

"Why..." He whispers, holding his phone tightly to his chest.

"Why can't I forget you?"

Biting his bottom lip, he quickly messages you, having the sudden urge to see you. Maybe then, would he realize what he can't find? Would he be able to create another memory, another moment in time? One that was yours and yours alone?

After a couple of moments, you don't answer.

Maybe...I was just afraid of letting go.

Standing almost decisively, he rushes out of the room, and down the hallways of the building.

I need to know.

As he rides the same elevator you rode yesterday down to the lobby, he holds his phone tighter in his hand.

If I don't find out now, I may never get another chance.

Desperate, he sends another message to you.

One more time.

Catching his face in the metallic walls of the elevator, he can't help but imagine yours smiling up at him. A face that makes everything seem alright again.

That's all I need.

What happens when that is taken away from him? What happens when he can no longer see the person who gives him courage? Biting his lip, he can feel the pain in his chest grow.

Just let me see you one more time.

He doesn't want to let you go.

As the elevator dings and he steps out, he pauses, seeing Namjoon right in front of him. Namjoon glances up, his eyes glazed over and tired, but when he sees Tae, they widen in recognition. Taehyung smiles inwardly to himself, he knows this look. A look lost in the wilderness of creativity and desolation.

"Oh, Taehyung!" he says, and Taehyung nods to him curtly before brushing past him and continuing to the front door. Namjoon, however, catches him by the wrist and Tae pauses, turning around.

"Namjoon?" His face is blank, but something in his eyes tells Tae to be wary. They are sort of dark, not really there, but urgent and anxious. Taehyung wonders how eyes can hold so many words, and yet tell you nothing at all.

"You knew, didn't you?"

At his words, Tae blinks, his heart pounding.

"I..."

"That's why you followed her, how you knew about her injury."

How does he know?

"When were you going to tell me?"

Biting his bottom lip, Taehyung can't help but feel a bit of aggravation towards his older friend. Why can't he keep anything to himself? Why is it a crime for him to live his own life, without everyone looking in? Yanking his arm out of Namjoon's grip, he scowls, turning on his heel.

"When it became your business."

Namjoon stands there, a bit in shock before rushing forward and taking Tae forcibly by the arm once more.

"Taehyung, wait!" At his touch, Tae tries to pull away, but Namjoon won't budge, his eyes desperate and wild. They unnerve Taehyung, make him want to escape, hide away until everything turns back to normal again. "If she's going to become an idol, any affiliation you have with her will only hurt her."

Tae's eyes widen at his words, snapping a hidden string he didn't know he had inside of him. RM doesn't notice, instead, his grip tightens around Tae until he feels as though he's suffocating from the inside out.

"You know that right?"

Gritting his teeth, Tae pulls away from Namjoon, staggering back until he's a good distance away. Raising his eyes to his hyung, Namjoon finds a look he's never seen in his younger friend before.

Loathing.

"Don't act as though you know everything." He spits before turning away and walking out of the door.

Namjoon sighs as he watches him leave before glancing over at the now empty lobby. The lobby where just a day ago, he met a sweet, cheerful girl. Someone who filled his mind with inspiration and wonder.

Smiling sadly, he rubs the back of his neck, looking up at the sky as though that will offer him the answers he seeks.

"Just who are you, Yen?"

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: this one was actually pretty hard to write, i'm ngl ;-;

chapter 25 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

[harringrooves]

Day 14. Shadow

When Billy comes back he brings a Shadow with him.

Not that thing that lines the scorching pavement behind you, but the shapeless form that peels itself away from your body with just a little bit of your soul.

It follows him everywhere. It whispers in his ear.

You took them. You killed them. You enjoyed it. You made yourself into it. It was easy for the monster, too easy. Neil saw it in you, all those years ago, that's why he did what he did. He was the real hero, protecting everyone else from you.

On his bravest days, Billy ignores it. On those days, he can smile and he can laugh, he can bat his eyes and flash his smile at the nurses at his physical therapist's office, he can skim his fingers down the bare skin of Steve's mole-spotted back, he can make himself big enough and loud enough to drown out the things he doesn't want to hear. It's an old trick, from even before all this possessed bullshit, but it works.

Mostly.

When he's feeling weaker, Billy whispers back. He tries to argue, uses logic and recycled arguments from Steve and Max and Mrs Byers (it's not your fault, you're just kid, you didn't know) and curls himself up in Steve's wardrobe, where he's boxed in safe and sound, cushioned by the heavy downing of winter coats and old jeans. He sits in the dark and he mumbles his rebuttals.

It's useless, though. Once it knows it's got his attention, the Shadow doesn't waste anytime. It digs it's tendrils into his skin like fishhooks made of frost bitten steel, and it latches on hard.

The Shadow always wins, always. It somehow knows the truth every time, no matter what Billy hisses back at it, and it delights in holding Billy's face up to it, forcing him to watch the blackened, grotesque knot of things he doesn't want to know as it grows and grows in his head like a tumour.

He has just enough left of himself on those days, though, to beat it down, shove the Shadow into one of Steve's many empty shoeboxes and lever himself out of the closet when he hears Steve banging around down in the kitchen ready to leave for work. He acts likes nothing's happened, but Steve can always tell and on those days he presses his chest to Billy's, arms in a purposefully loose circle around his shoulders, and rubs his cheek over the frizzy top of Billy's head.

The knot doesn't dissolve immediately, but it goes away eventually if he has enough good days in between his bad ones, enough time to rebuild the shaky frame he puts up around him, all shiny, big, bold colours with nothing inside to prop it up. And usually, he has enough time.

But there's some days where there's more Shadow than Billy, more dark and whispered truth than there is of his puffed up, airy bravado of a golden man reborn. It leaves him crashing in on himself, quietly and motionlessly, like an earthquake at the centre of the world.

Those days when Billy's at his weakest, laying as noiseless and unmoving as a corpse, it's Steve who whispers to him and drowns out the relentless gnawing voice of the Shadow. How brave Billy is, how strong, how beautiful, how gentle. He goes through endless lists of things he loves about Billy, never saying the things Billy expects him to. Steve doesn't talk about the mall, or high school. Instead, he talks about Billy dancing along to the Madonna records he swears he only tolerates for Steve, about Billy dropping by on the days Robin's not working to have lunch together because he knows eating alone reminds Steve of his years without his parents, about Billy climbing onto the roof to get a ball down for the neighbour's kid, about Billy teaching Max to throw a punch and line her lips so her gloss doesn't smudge over her chin, about Billy telling California stories of endless beach and lit up boardwalks to Mrs Byers as they sit and fold washing together on the couch.

It's an endless and ever-growing list, and there are bad bad days where Billy still hasn't so much as wriggled his toes even by the time the sun dips low on the horizon, and still Steve whispers until his voice is hoarse and cracking. And then, when he can't whisper anymore, Steve will crowd himself up against Billy's prone body and breathe slow and steady beside his ear, so that the only thing Billy can feel and hear and know is Steve alive and in love right beside him.

[alice-angel12x]

💔Gem!Deku x Gem!Reader

"You think this is the place?" Asked a rouge.

"Yep, that's what our sources tell us," Said another.

"You got the cages and rope ready," The leader asked.

"Yeah of course, but why did we bring this dead weight," A low Lackie asked kicking a tarp-covered cage.

"Because this dead weight is our bait. Those rocks have a soft spot for their own kind, especially the weaker and fragile ones," The leader said as he ripped the tarp away.

Revealing a bound Phosphophyllite gem with messy dark green hair and green eyes. His wrists and ankles were tied together, and a piece of cloth was wrapped around his mouth.

"You know the drill, right Deku," The leader smiled cruelly.

"MMhhm! NNmph!" Deku tried to scream.

The Trappers grabbed the helpless gem as they descended into the caves.

The Kessho people, or gem people many humans call them. Being made entirely of crystals of all kinds, they are highly sought after by humans. Because their entire body was made of pure and untainted crystals, many hunters seek these beauties. For things from jewelry to weapons, or just want a shiny servent, many reasons.

So the gems hide in many places of the world, from small islands to deep underground tunnels and caves. Anywhere out of human reach.

-------

Please. I don't want any part of this. Please let me go! I tried to cry out but I couldn't with the gag in the way. The memories of previous raids started resurfacing. They would use gems like me to lure others out of hiding, for what reason they help me varies. Some communities of gem had an elitist-like community, or even ones made up of one kind of gems. But when they got close they were ambushed and locked away in cages. They would after be turned into weapons and jewelry.

"Here, place him here," The leader Rato said.

They placed me down near a ledge and ripped away from my gag. Looking over I could see two gems walking by down below. I tried to stay as quiet and still as I could so they wouldn't notice me.

"Deku's too quiet," Rato growled.

He stomped on my hand shattering it. I could hold back the pain as I cried out, it echoed throughout the cave. Looking down at the gems below they quickly spotted me and ran away. Good at least they won't get caught.

-------------

Suddenly there was a rustle and a-

"SMASH!!" shouted a large gem.

The gem delivered a powerful punch knocking three of the rouges away. Deku stared in awe at the scene and the powerful gem with a brave smile on his face, but the wind was so strong that Deku was blown off the edge. Time seemed to slow as he watches the edge grow farther and farther away. Deku shut his eyes closed waiting for his painful end When an f/c blurr caught him.

"Are you alright?" Asked a kind voice.

Deku looked up to his hero to be meet E/c eyes with their hair the same color to match. His eyes sparkled as his hero's hair Glimmered beautifully in the moonlight. He looked down to see he was being held bridle style.

"Y-yes," Deku stuttered bashfully.

"Don't worry your safe now, as long as your under All Mights protection you have nothing to fear," The (gem type) smiled.

But Deku couldn't help but just stare at this new gem as an infatuation grew. His captures were long dealt with as the new group of gems escorted him back to their hidden home.

"u-um who are you?" Deku asked the mysterious G/t(gem type).

"Well my friends like to call me Y/n," they smiled as they untied Deku.

"I-I'm Deku," He said with a beet-red face.

"Pleasure to meet you Deku," Y/n greeted as they handed him over to other gems.

"Ochaco, Momo this is Deku. Please get him property clothed and make sure he feels welcomed," All Might a Yellow diamond smiled. (No not that one)

-------------

From that day on I have lived with these Gems for the past 300 years, and my feelings for Y/n only grew. They were so brave and confident, was also one of the greatest fighters in the village. One of the few gems trained under All Might. Sadly cause I only have a toughness scale of 3, so I wasn't suited for combat.

Though All Might noticed that I was very observant and good with notes, so he assigned me to the encyclopedia. My job is to take notes of the enemies we encounter and record events. Then there were some books about stuff I made up, humans would call them fantasies or stories. Though I didn't mind this being my job cause Y/n would come by and read my works. I couldn't help but feel lighter than air and embarrassed at the same time as they were reading my work.

Y/n would always come in after her patrol, come in and read, or more often just sit down and talk to me. Though most of the time it was just him listening to whatever good memories of the human world, or my memories of my original home.

I tried to keep my feeling to myself the best I could by just doodling in my private book, just for my eyes only, but I guess I wasn't secret enough.

"Wow dude, you really have a thing for Y/n," said a voice.

I gasped as I jumped back to see it was Denki, who quickly snatched my drawing book and speed through my embarrassing drawings.

"Wow, you've got it bad. All these drawings are of Y/n and you being lovey-dovey," He said out loud.

Attracting the attention of Iida the Topaz and Ochaco the pink diamond ( No not that one you SU fans). They quickly came over and looked through my book.

"Wow, looks like Touya has a love rival," Ochaco gasped.

Touya the padparadscha gem, was also one of the top fighters for the village and is always Y/n's patrol partner, who was also pinning after them too. There would be times he would just randomly jump into our conversation and steal their attention. But I couldn't hear what they were saying as I covered my ears in embarrassment.

"Oh no, Y/n forgot their other sword," Momo gasped.

"I'll take it to them!" I offered as I quickly grabbed the weapon and ran out of the library.

"Does he know  where Y/n and Touya are?" Momo asked.

"It even notes was Y/n patrols today," Denki said flipping through the pages not paying attention.

----------

Y/n and Touya stood guard at one of the cave entrances, as the warm sunlight funneled through. Y/n smiled as she felt the warm light on her powered covered surface.

"Hey Y/n, do you ever wonder what could be on the surface?" Touya asked.

"Ever since Deku came and told me stories of the surface, it only fueled my imagination," Y/n turned to her trusted partner.

"One day we'll be the ones on top, and I'll take you all over the surface. Just you and me," Touya said with confidence.

" That's an awfully big promise Touya," Y/n said as they sat next to him.

"I mean we can always just wait till the humans go extinct," Touya suggested.

"Haha, all right. I'll hold you to that promise," Y/n laughed as they gently held Touya's hand.

Deku watched from the side of a tunnel wall, as he sighed sadly and turned back into the tunnel. He wandered the cave tunnels as he hugged Y/n's sword close to him. As he turned the corner he bumped into something, something large.

------------

I felt lighter than air as I stared into Y/n's e/c eyes.

"AAAAHHHH!" Someone screamed.

"How did the enemy pass us?" Y/n gasped.

"No, maybe the other entrances were compromised," I suggested.

"You go check the next entrance over and see if anything is wrong, I'll go check up the tunnels," Y/n said as she ran down into the dark caves.

With a sigh, I ran to the next entrance that leads to the forests, which was supposed to be guarded by Katsuki and Shoto. Turning the corner he saw two humans picking up pieces of Shoto and Bakugou and stuffing them into potato sacks. Touya quickly drew his sword and cut down the intruders.

Touya to worried about his partner quickly stuffed the rest of Shoto and Bakugou into the bag, not caring he is mixing their pieces, and quickly ran to the village.

---------

"Looks like we caught a phosphophyllite, hold that rock tight Nomu," A light blue hair human smile.

The giant mutant humanoid figure Nomu nodded silently as it the poor gem in its giant hands. Deku's arms were broken off as he was restrained by Nomu's brute strength.

"What fine craftsmen ship, able to slice through rock," Said a tall human with dark back- purple hair.

"LET ME GO!" Deku screamed as he tried to break free from the Nomu.

"Nomu shut the pebble up before he alerts the others," The man growled.

"HEY!" Y/n shouted.

"Another one," The other human grumbled.

"Y/n," Deku smiled in relief.

"Let him go," Y/n said lowly.

"Nomu get it," Tomura pointed at the G/t.

Y/n ran towards the creature and sliced its head clean off, with the sharp edge of her arm. Deku stared with worried and sad eyes as he looked over their damaged form. The left section around her face was broken off, the elbow broke off their left arm, they were missing their right hand, and her right leg was horribly cracked, and it looked like it could fall apart at any moment.

Y/n moved swiftly and kicked the human hard in the face. Deku quickly got up as the two ran down the tunnel.

Deku looked back to see Y/n was having a bit of trouble keeping up with Deku.

"Y/n, are you okay?" Deku asked.

"Don't worry turn right and follow," Y/n said as she pushed forward.

As the two quickly turned the corner, the humans regained their composer and made chase after the two.  Y/n pushed a medium-sized boulder away from a tiny hole in the side of the cave wall. Deku hesitantly got in when suddenly Y/n started to close the opening.

"Y/n What are you doing?" Deku asked as the opening became too small for him to even squeeze out of.

"Hiding you, I'll come back for you. I have to lead them away from the village," Y/n explained as they backed away.

"No, Please don't do this. Don't leave me Y/n. I- I want to tell you something first,'' Deku said quickly.

Y/n smiled sadly as she turned to face Deku from the other side of the boulder. Deku could tell they were ready to throw their life away for everyone, for him.

"Y/n, I love-,"

Suddenly Y/n's head was sliced clean off by a thrown sword. Deku gasped in horror as he watched Y/n's body fall to the ground, he tried to reach out but he had no arm to hold out.

Deku wanted to scream and cry, but no sound came out of him. Y/n slowly turned their head towards Deku and mouthed.

'Please live for me, Deku," they mouthed as the humans quickly gathered her broken body.

They were in such a rush they left Y/n's head behind. Deku fell to his knees as he stared at his crush for so long. It felt like an eternity When All Might and Touya arrived, Their eyes widen with horror and sorrow as Touya fell to his knees and held Y/n's head. He put their foreheads together as he cried out in sorrow.

"NOO!" Touya cried.

All might soon notice Deku was trapped behind the boulder and quickly moved it aside with no effort.

"Let us go Young Deku, we need to evacuate the village before they bring more of them," All might said as he helped Deku to his feet.

-----------

(400 years later)

It has been a long time since Y/n's death, All Might changed in a way after his student's death. If he weren't needed, he would lock himself away, but for the most part, he was still the jolly smiling gem he was before. Touya, on the other hand, didn't take Y/n's death all that well, he did lose his love who was his partner for 800 years. He started to call himself Dabi and started to cover only parts of his face, giving him a patchwork look. It not only scared most humans but fellow gems too.

I was upgraded to a medic after Momo was taken about 200 years back, we some people over the years and gained new ones too. I helped piece gems back together, but my main goal is to bring Y/n back. The village moved up high into the mountain, so high it would be difficult for them to breathe, but Humans would risk their lives and come up anyways. Some came with Weapons and tools made of gems, and many times they were G/t so I slowly put Y/n back together piece by piece.

I Finished them for the most part, but there were still 3 large gaping holes in their torso. I tried to use other gem pieces that matched her Mohs scale. Yet it only worked sometimes, she would wake up for about three minutes. Yet when they do everyone who was watching my work quickly rushed in to tell them how much they missed them and update them on everything.

Even Tou- Dabi would come by. Y/n was weirded out at first but they got used to it quickly and I would never really get a chance to talk to them, but I will never forget the last time they woke up. As they said their goodnight to everyone, they turned to me as said.

"I'll miss you Deku, I can't wait to wake up to see you again," Y/n smiled as they fell back unconscious.

I'll bring you back Y/n so I can tell you how I feel.

[ibijau]

*chanting* sangxuan, sangxuan! because I’ve been reminded that I love that ship, have a continuation of that fic where jzx is a very repressed bi with a huge ass crush on nhs

It takes Nie Mingjue about a week to realise that there's something wrong with Nie Huaisang. The first day or two, he blames it on the shock it must be for his brother to have finally graduated from Lan Qiren's classes, and with unexpectedly high grades at that. That success must have given Nie Huaisang one of his sudden short bursts of motivation, and that's why he's suddenly attending sabre practice with the other disciple, and showing up on time for lessons. Those bursts are usually short lived, in Nie Mingjue's experience. Where the sabre is concerned, five consecutive days of hard work is his brother's record.

So on day eight, when Nie Huaisang is still showing up dutifully, still trying his best to get the movements right, Nie Mingjue becomes concerned. When the lesson is over, he asks his brother to follow him to his office so Nie Huaisang can learn how to help with something, as befits a young master of a prominent sect. Normally, this is the time of the day where Nie Huaisang likes to take time to play with his birds, something he's always particularly enthusiastic about right after returning from Gusu. But this time he follows Nie Mingjue with only the briefest of hesitations.

Slowly going from merely concerned to actively worried, Nie Mingjue decides to see how far he can push this before his brother starts acting like himself again. He gives Nie Huaisang a pile of letters to be sorted through by order of importance according to a number of criteria such as the nature of the problem, the rank of the writer, and their physical location. Night Hunting doesn't interest Nie Huaisang, so it is always a bother for him to think about creatures and remember how dangerous any of them might be. He also can't see the point of keeping track of whether a duke or a magistrate is supposed to be given more consideration. As for geography, Nie Huaisang could get lost inside his own bedroom.

And yet aside from a deep, heartfelt sigh upon being given that task, Nie Huaisang doesn't show any reaction. He just picks a chair, makes some space for himself on the side of his brother's desk, and gets to work. Nie Mingjue sits down as well, ostensibly to check some bills, but most of his attention is on his brother who is never this obedient and helpful.

“Alright, what have you done this time?” Nie Mingjue asks after a while.

Looking up from the letter he's studying, Nie Huaisang stares at him with confusion written all over his face. He could pass as perfectly innocent if Nie Mingjue didn't know him better than that.

“Did you get in trouble in Gusu before leaving?” he insists. “Or on the way home?”

“Why would you think I got in trouble?” Nie Huaisang gasps, the very picture of wounded virtue. Nie Mingjue only has to gesture at the pile of letters for his brother to drop the act. “Oh, that. Well. I've decided that I need to become a better person. I can't keep wasting my youth in frivolous pursuits. The young master of a sect must be proficient in martial arts, in cultivation, and know about running an estate. Isn't that what you're always telling me?”

“And you're never listening.”

Nie Huaisang grimaces slightly at the accusation, but nods.

“I have not always been all that I ought to be,” he sighs, rather dramatically. “But I am a changed man.”

“I'm not sure that you can call yourself a man when you're not even eighteen,”

“A changed person,” Nie Huaisang corrects without missing a beat, glaring at his brother. “I need to improve my public image, or else I'll never get to marry.”

Just like that, Nie Mingjue relaxes. Out of every reasons Nie Huaisang might have had to straighten his act, this is the least worrying one. He's the right age to start thinking about that sort of things after all, and he's apparently made a lot of friends this past year in Gusu.

“Do you have someone specific in mind?” Nie Mingjue asks, trying his best to hide his amusement.

“Maybe I do,” Nie Huaisang grumbles after just a moment of hesitation.

“Boy, girl?”

“Does it really matter? You'll let me have however I want, right?”

There's a surprising note of worry to Nie Huaisang's voice, which Nie Mingjue doesn't like in the least.

“I just ask because it'll take more work to convince the parents of your beloved if it's a boy,” he clarifies, and yet his brother doesn't relax at all. If anything, Nie Huaisang starts frowning and bites his lip. “So it's a boy, and the family is stupid about these things,” Nie Mingjue guesses.

Nie Huaisang sighs and flops over the desk, ruining his careful work with the letters.

“It's hopeless, his parents are stupid!”

“Don't badmouth your future in-laws, Huaisang.”

“It's fine, you'll agree with me when you know who it is, and how much they've messed him up.”

That's a worrying statement, but for now Nie Mingjue decides to treat it as a secondary problem. It's hardly the first time Huaisang develops a crush on someone. When he was eight, he wanted to marry Lan Xichen for a few weeks. At thirteen, he threatened to court Wen Qing who he'd seen once at a conference and to run off with her. Nie Huaisang is older and (allegedly) more mature now, but Nie Mingjue prefers to check how serious this is before calculating an auspicious date.

“Well, tell me about him then,” Nie Mingjue demands. “What unlucky bastard caught your eye this time?”

“Bastard no, definitely not,” Nie Huaisang snorts. “Unlucky... yeah. He's... well, first of all, he's handsome.”

“Goes without saying. You're too vain to settle for someone less than stunning.”

Nie Huaisang sticks out his tongue and sits back up so he can slap his brother's arm.

“Rude, very rude. Anyway, he's the most gorgeous person in the world, especially when he laughs. But he sadly doesn't laugh a lot. He's been trained out of it, I think.”

For a brief moment, Nie Mingjue wonders if his brother is in love with Lan Wangji... but no, Nie Huaisang wouldn't dare to call Lan Qiren stupid.

“He's also pretty nice, when you know him,” Nie Huaisang continues, smiling to himself. “He complains a lot, but he'd offer to study with me and he'd really try to help me. And he's serious and righteous. No matter how many times I offered to let him cheat on tests, he'd always refuse because he wanted to succeed through his own work.”

“You set the bar so low,” Nie Mingjue comments, though at least now he knows how his brother got such good grades. It's almost reassuring, in a twisted way. “Doesn't cheat on tests, somewhat nice to you... I'm not really sold on this.”

“I am,” Nie Huaisang retorts, his smile growing a little warmer. “When he looks at me, it's like he's looking at the moon and wondering how he could ever reach it. Like I'm the most incredible person in his life.”

That does sound like something that would appeal to Nie Huaisang's vanity, though Nie Mingjue wouldn't quite call it enough to get married.

“And what do you see when you look at him?”

For a moment, Nie Huaisang falls silent, his expression turning serious. Nie Mingjue is half getting scared that he's made his brother realise how shallow his feelings are, when Nie Huaisang speaks again.

“I see someone I want to make happy and to protect from everything bad,” he announces, a deep frown on his brow. “I see someone who has been hurt, and it makes me hurt as well, because he's so wonderful, and the people who hurt him are the ones who should have protected him, and it makes me so angry that something like that happened to him. I just... I just want to take him away from everyone who's ever made him feel bad about himself, and bring him somewhere safe, and hold him in my arms until he's never afraid again of what others will say about him. Is that... Is that weird?”

Coming from any other Nie, it would be normal, Nie Mingjue thinks. Their family tends to have a protective streak, even toward people who don't quite need it. It's a little odd to hear this coming from Nie Huaisang, but he is a Nie too, so it shouldn't be a surprise that he loves like one.

“So I'm guessing you want for him to marry into the family, rather than you joining theirs?” Nie Mingjue asks.

To his surprise, Nie Huaisang shakes his head.

“Won't work, his parents won't allow it. Damn, they won't be happy with it even like this. But it's... da-ge, I think I'm really in love with him,” Nie Huaisang sighs, blushing at his own confession. “I didn't mean too, it was supposed to just be a game, but I really love him. If there's got to be someone, I want it to be him.”

“Then you'll have him,” Nie Mingjue promises, like it's an evidence.

To him, it is. Their sect doesn't bother playing the game of alliances through marriages that others do. They're a little more like the Lan in that respect, even if they're not quite as ostentatious about it, and they don't bat an eye at second or even third marriages. So if Nie Huaisang has decided he wants this person, enough so that he's willing to put in effort to improve himself for over an entire week, Nie Mingjue will help him. He is weak to his brother's whims, and even weaker to his rare moments of determination.

“You don't even know who it is,” Nie Huaisang protests. “You have no idea how difficult it'll be... I really might have to run away with him and become a rogue cultivator with him, because his parents are so damn stupid! And also, I'm not sure you'd actually approve if you knew...”

“Is it one of Wen Ruohan's sons?”

The immediate grimace of disgust and betrayal on Nie Huaisang's face make it hard not to laugh.

“I told you he's handsome!” Nie Huaisang gasps. “I have taste, da-ge!”

“Aside from these two, you can marry whoever you like,” Nie Mingjue retorts. “Even other Wens if that's what you want,” he generously adds, knowing full well that there were none in Gusu, and so it's unlikely that his brother's beloved is from the sect that killed their father. Even if he were though, Nie Mingjue would do what's needed to make his brother happy, trusting him to find the one person from that sect who would have any value as a person.

Nie Huaisang is less than impressed by that statement.

“You promise?”

Maybe it really is a Wen, Nie Mingjue wonders. If so, it's too late to back off.

“I promise. Any person you want, any sect, if you say it's a decent person, if that's who you want to spend your life with, I'll do what it takes.”

“I'll hold you to that,” Nie Huaisang threatens with a cheerful smile. “I want to marry Jin Zixuan.”

Nie Mingjue stares at his brother, refusing to believe he's heard that correctly... but no, Nie Huaisang is grinning like he pulled the con of the century, that manipulative little shit. He did, in a way. However much Nie Mingjue hates Wen Ruohan and dreams of slaughtering him, at least that's someone he can somewhat respect. Jin Guangshan, on the other hand...

Nie Mingjue shivers in disgust.

Maybe a Wen would have been better after all.

[datawyrms]

Irresistible

For PhicPhight! On Ao3

“Earth to clueless one, walking through walls isn’t something you should be doing right now!” Sam’s hiss made him notice the fact something had grabbed his wrist.

“Right, sorry!” He said it without thinking, eyes flicking to Tucker. His other friend looked just as concerned, great. “I don’t think I got enough sleep.”

“When do you ever, dude? You didn’t even sneak out last night.” Still, his more technically inclined friend released his wrist. “Something your parents working on keeping you up?”

“You know we’re fine if you crash in our rooms.” Sam was a little less gentle. “So do that instead of whatever sleepwalking this is.”

“No! Like, I don’t remember not being able to sleep or anything?” Not that it helped, he felt like he’d been awake all night thanks to the weird dreams. “I swear I’m not being a tough guy or whatever.” He rubbed at his forehead, privately wishing his fingers could just push away the fog of exhaustion instead of just making him more aware of how sluggish he felt.

“Maybe you should crash with one of us anyway? You don’t look good.” Tucker’s frown only made the half ghost grumble. “‘Course you never look as good as me, but lately? You’re pulling the two thirds ghost look.”

“Harhar.” He shrugged the suggestion off, even if he was pretty tempted. There wasn’t anything weird in the house that he noticed, and his parents weren’t being any more anti-ghost then usual. He probably slept in a weird position or something. “I don’t think weird underwater dreams are a Fentonworks exclusive.”

“Underwater?” Sam just looked puzzled. “From what? I can’t even remember the last time any of us went swimming.”

“How should I know?” He couldn’t even say it was like flying, because it wasn’t like one of those dreams at all. Too sluggish, none of the freedom he normally felt. “I’ll just nap in math class…”

It had been a joke, really. He didn’t actually mean to sleep in math class, but his desk was cool and his head felt so heavy that he couldn’t resist nodding off. He just wished it had helped more, the bell ringing just made him want to sink into the floor and stay there. Which would probably freak everyone out. Not a good idea. At least the stern talking to he earned for ‘being disrespectful’ went right over his head with it so hazy.

“Dude. Just skip if you’re gonna sleep all day.” Tucker was poking him in the face with a fork. Rude.

“I’m not gonna sleep all day. Relax.” The tines were annoying, but doing more than blindly pushing it away from him was beyond him for the moment.

“Spacing out all day isn’t any better.” Sam’s voice wasn’t a surprise, but the fact she wasn't telling Tucker to stop poking him in the face was.

“I’m not.”

“Tucker’s been poking you for five minutes.”

“Oh.” Really? Hadn’t felt like that. Maybe he had like a ghost cold?

“Just go hide out in the attic, you obviously need it.” The poking stopped, Tucker’s voice low as if he’d leaned closer.

“Can’t miss even more stuff guys…you know that.” Even if he really, really wanted to take that offer right now.

“Well here you’ll just get the teachers angry by snoozing through class. We’ll try and see what’s messing with you after school.”

“Nothing’s messing with me! I think.” His objection wasn’t great, but Sam didn’t seem up to argue with him about it anyway.

Tucker adjusted his hat, avoiding his eyes. “Kinda hope something is, you’re kinda freaking us out.”

Well, that didn’t feel good. He scratched at the back of his head, trying to ignore how his friends kept looking at him like some kind of wounded kitten. He was fine, really! “Well uh. See you after school?” He didn’t give them time to answer before stumbling away from the table to find somewhere quiet to vanish from. He sort of hoped being in his ghost form would have shaken some of his muddled need for sleep, but being colder just made the throbbing behind his eyes feel worse. Not enough to keep him from keeping invisible and slipping into Tucker’s attic, but enough that becoming human again actually made him feel a little less ragged.

It shouldn’t be this easy to huddle in the musty old chair and drop off in the middle of the day. The guilt for doing so alone should make him twist and struggle to get comfortable, but sleep welcomed him eagerly. A part of him worried Nocturn was afoot, but it wasn’t enough to keep him awake.

“You think his parents made something that makes ghosts go dormant or something?”

“Or drain all their energy?

He kind of wanted to ignore the voices and keep sleeping, but shook himself awake. He didn’t need this much sleep, he was fine. If they were here he’d been sleeping for hours already!

“Sleeping beauty awakes.”

Danny rolled his eyes at Tucker’s attempt to pretend they hadn’t been talking about him. “You better not have kissed me.”

“If you kept sleeping for another hour he totally would have.” Sam smirk only grew when Tucker let out an offended squawk.

“Under duress!”

“The meat stench on your breath could wake the dead, so it had to be you.”

“Not dead yet, thanks…” Even if he’d been feeling tired enough to be a corpse today. “Anyone notice?”

“Told Lancer you were sick. He bought it.” Tucker shrugged, tossing a thermos between his hands. “You were really out of it huh?”

“Wait, was there an attack?”

“Nothing we couldn’t handle.” Sam snatched the thermos away, glaring at Tucker as she did so. “You stay here, we’ll check out your house.”

He’d just slept through a ghost attacking? Really? “No way, how would you explain why I’m not with you?”

“Easy. We’ll just say you are, they won’t notice.” The goth scoffed, already halfway to getting the attic door open. “If you can hide being a ghost, we can hide you not being there for an afternoon.”

She sort of had a point there. “Fine. You aren’t gonna find anything. If it was some new gadget I’d say so.”

He kind of hoped they’d prove him wrong, but the concerned and frustrated looks on their faces betrayed that there were no new plans or even an idea to what had gotten him ‘out of sorts’. It was probably just a one off thing anyway, he’d be fine. It wasn’t like his parents were bragging about a new discovery or anything. He probably wouldn’t be able to sleep since he spent so much of the day doing so, though he was still tired...he actually looked forward to dinner being over so he could snuggle under his blankets and look at the little glowing stick on stars of his ceiling before drifting off again.

Only the dream came back. A small, pitiful ghost underwater while something kept calling at him. It wasn’t warm or inviting, more like the command from someone respected. The wisp of a creature couldn’t really ignore it either, it was like a pulse that burrowed inside and thrummed until he responded. They weren’t asking for much. Just wanted him to go hunt ghosts. He always did that anyway, that part was easy.

He didn’t like how the commanding one grabbed him under the chin at his return, but couldn’t find it in him to struggle. They were stronger than he was, he was a subordinate not strong enough to challenge them. A pair, stronger and unknowable with how they’d speak in a language he didn’t understand. He could only watch, green eyes wide for any hint of anger, wanting to make himself smaller, but the creature was little more than a shadow to begin with. Hunt, bring them the prey they wanted, and they’d allow him to exist. A fair trade, really. His core trembled at the idea the clawed hands at his face could easily sink into his chest, he couldn’t risk angering them. Their red eyes saw everything, knew everything. He didn’t want to be around them, but that call was too strong. Those eyes lurked on every surface, a burning red that cut through the weight of the water that was everything as if it wasn’t even there. Their commands became a sort of second skin, but didn’t protect him from the beings deciding to come uncomfortably close, or clutch his thin limbs and take something before letting him slip back into undefined chaos again.

He preferred being told to hunt. Leaving other ghosts, the smaller ones, lesser than even the inkblot he was in the universe to be looked over and examined while he remained mostly untouched. Still wispy, mostly undefined outside of his eyes, unlike the remains of those who ‘earned’ the greater ones full attention. No time to rest, just going and going until they claimed he’d done enough.

Being dismissed wasn’t a free pass to do as he pleased though. It was still a command, something he had to obey lest they show him why they were in charge. To go in hiding, be unseen, do nothing until they wanted him to hunt again. That should be easy, simple, but it made his tail ache and his heart lurch. He didn’t only want to hunt, he wanted to do not-ghost things.

Yet the figures didn’t care what a weaker ghost wanted to do. They’d find out. He had to hide.

Danny just felt exhausted. As if the dream had made him as tired as the ghost he was in that nightmare. Which couldn’t be true, he didn’t care about stronger ghosts and what they wanted. He’d fought the king of ghosts! He had a track record of flipping off authority when it suited him better. It didn’t push away the heavy weight in his head that only begged him to go back to sleep. Maybe he really was just sick.

Sick enough to get sent right back to bed by his mom when he slumped down for breakfast, her concern nice, but also discomforting. She held her hand at his forehead for a touch too long, seemed to stare into his eyes enough to make him want to avert them. Her gentle nudging to get some more sleep nearly had him bolting up the stairs. Like he had to go that moment. Rubbing at his temples didn’t dissuade the feeling, but the pressure lifted somewhat when he was back in bed and covered in blankets. Some stupid leftover feeling from that dream or something. He wasn’t hiding.

“Danny? You okay under there?” Jazz’s question just felt like a nail to his skull, and he hoped she could see the displeasure in his eyes as he poked out from under the blankets to glare at her.

“I might be if someone didn’t wake me up.” The sunlight peeking in from the windows only soured his mood, he should have closed the blinds.

“Well, someone’s grumpy.” Either she didn’t see his annoyance, or she was deliberately ignoring it. “Mom said you don’t have a fever, but you run pretty cold...do you want something for it?”

“It’s just a headache.”

“Sure, mister ‘I ignored a bone fracture’ is crippled by a headache. Not buying it.”

“That was meant to be a secret, who snitched?” His frustration just made him feel uncomfortably warm, they knew he hated it when Jazz fussed over that stuff. Maybe he should ignore their calls for a bit.

“No one did, I actually pay attention when you start favouring your left hand.” Her frown just made him want to duck back out of sight. “You sure you don’t need anything? Anything mom and dad wouldn’t think you need?”

For a smart person, Jazz could be incredibly unsubtle. “No. I’m just worn out, or something.” He didn’t feel like coughing or sneezing, or even the gurgling discomfort of an upset stomach. It couldn’t be that serious. “You’ll be late if you keep standing there.”

“Let us know if you think of anything!” She was already halfway down the hall while saying that, not getting to see how her brother rolled his eyes and ducked back under the blankets. Her biggest weakness, other obligations. Not that it would help after school. He’d be fine by then, probably. Just some peace and quiet and he’d be back to normal. Just like he said yesterday. Only for real this time. Positive thinking, or whatever.

He did feel a bit better now that it was quiet. Still tired, but his head wasn’t pounding as much as it was whenever someone insisted on talking to him.

He figured he’d just sleep, maybe play Doomed once he was more awake. Step one, sleeping had been going well, but Mom and Dad had other plans jeopardizing that. Since when did they listen to music while they worked? With enough base that he could feel it rattling his bones no less. Covering his ears couldn’t do much about that. Trying to ignore it, or hope they were just messing with something for a minute and it would stop wasn’t getting anywhere either. So why was he just hesitating up here? They probably didn’t even notice it was so loud, or forgot he was home sick. He shook his legs to try and wake them up after he wobbled with his first steps to the door. Maybe he could- no, there wasn’t any reason to just wait.

When had they gotten so many stairs anyway? Danny found himself gripping the railing as if he was seven again, worried about slipping as if he didn’t run down them two at a time normally. He hesitated at the bottom, eyes scanning the ground floor for a sign of the scientists. The awful noise didn’t seem much louder, but he felt every beat of it as his heart seemed to slip into sync. He didn’t want to risk more stairs, he was imagining things. He opened his mouth to speak, coughing instead over how dry it felt. Sleeping with his mouth open, duh. His second attempt went better, but was not as much of a shout as he planned it to be. “Mom? Dad? Can you turn it down?”

He waited. Nothing. It must be too loud for them to hear him over the din of that deafening pulse. Keeping one ear covered the boy edged to the lab’s staircase, staring down them as if he was looking from a mountaintop, a deadly drop. He so didn’t want to go down there, to go closer to whatever the heck it was. “Dad? Mom?” He called again, trying to ignore how his voice cracked at the question. He wasn’t scared of a staircase! His heart kept pounding in his ears, knuckles going white as he kept his hands in anxious fists. Everything told him to get back, to stay away, but couldn’t stand the noise. Besides, what if it was hurting them? Maybe that’s why they didn’t answer? Worry for them helped push back the seaping cold, heading down to the lab faster than he’d managed to get down from his room.

It was brightly lit, normal but cold. He could see them, hunched over a work desk and unharmed. The glare made his eyes hurt, pausing to rub at them. They seemed blurry, even though he wasn’t that far away. “Uh, Mom, Dad? Can you turn down whatever you’re working on? I can’t sleep.” He asked, unable to convince his legs to step a bit closer, feeling too tired to make any extra effort.

“Turn down what sweetie?” She turned to face him, making his blood try to turn to ice in his veins. She sounded right, said the right thing-but he was already trying to back up the stairs. Was she taller? “Sweetie? You look pale.”

“T-The noise.” The answer sputtered from him unbidden as he tried desperately to figure out what was wrong with-with-his mom? The echoed pounding told him no, it wasn’t, but who else could it be. “I can hear it upstairs.”

She approached with a too long stride, his own legs slipping in his blind step upwards. Pain from his elbow slamming into the edge of the staircase managed to rip through him even while everything else felt slow. She only quickened towards him as he cursed, trying to crabwalk backwards from the mother-that-was-not.

“Danny! Are you okay? Let me help you.” She grabbed him around the shoulders and he froze, a rabbit being watched by a hawk. She was too real, too solid, she could easily rip through him. “Maybe we should get you to the doctor honey, there’s isn’t anything on down here.”

Should he squirm away? She was lying about the sound, it kept pounding against him like a tide and he had no way to ride the wave clutched as he was. “There is, the thing over there-” He didn’t know what it was, but he could feel it, that it was over with the other figure, the one who hadn’t come to snag an intruder.

The hand on his forehead burned, but he couldn’t flinch away. “Sweetie, I think I’d know if your Dad was playing it.” The eyes bore into him, scanning him for any slight movement. “Jack, can you start the RV? I think we should take Danny to emergency.”

The other figure moved, massive, larger than he could imagine. It might hurt him, it might hurt his mom! “S-Stay back!” He yelled, a spark of energy finding its way to him. He couldn’t let his mom get attacked by whatever this was- no wonder she seemed strange, this thing was doing it.

“Well I gotta get up the stairs Danno! You don’t look good, you just wait there.” It was speaking as it came closer, but all it did was make the bile rise in his throat as it pretended to be his father. He squirmed free to stumble forward and block this thing from his mom, eyes burning green as he tried to shove past the exhaustion and fight.

“I said STAY BACK!”

The figure paused at his shriek and wild eyed fury, face unreadable. “Danny?” His voice was low, booming in a way that started to drain all his prior hope to fight the thing off. “Madds? I don’t think emergency can fix what he’s got.”

Claws sunk into his back, his neck aching at the speed used to look back at his mother, too long fingers tight on his shoulders and keeping hims still as he stared up and felt even smaller. “You don’t think he’s possessed?” She wasn’t talking to him, and that was a relief even as his heart tried to run off without him with how fast it wanted to go.

“Y-You did something to my mom.” The accusation made it easier to keep on his feet, but didn’t lessen her grip or stop the giant from approaching. “Take your noisemaker and get out!” If it was gone, it’d be fine, they’d be safe, he was sure of it.

“Danny, that’s your dad sweetie. Not a monster.” The voice was gentle, but he could feel how the arms shook, how she  increased the strength of her grip so he couldn’t pull away again. “You keep doing your best to fight that ghost off Danny, dad will help you.”

The larger figure grabbed the horrible silver device, the red gems adorning the horn’s buttons making him feel empty and helpless. “S-Stop it, you can’t let it use that mom!” He pleaded, but she didn’t release him, just pulled him closer to the smothering warmth. “Please, listen to me!” Of course she didn’t, controlled by that thing, twisted into thinking it was Dad, that it was quiet. Becoming intangible let him slip free, but he only managed two steps before the behemoth blew a long sustained note that made his skin vibrate and eyes swim. He crumpled to the cool floor, staring up at the monster in a silent horror. He couldn’t fight this thing- he’d been a fool to try and the red eyes promised retribution for his behaviour.

“Get out of my son right now, ghost.” It snarled, pointing directly at his crumpled form so he could not pretend to misunderstand. Yet he’d given an order he couldn’t follow. His core screeched in terror as his heart pounded, he couldn’t get out. Yet he had to, or this thing would devour him, shred him to nothing with nothing but sound. He could only try the closest he could get to ‘out’ of his own skin, shuddering as flesh melted to ectoplasm, trying not to scream as suit replaced skin. Not his normal transformation, this one was too slow- too confused by the order he couldn’t follow to make it an instantaneous change. He had to show he wasn’t wearing his human skin, show how completely he changed. Dying slowly, bit by bit  to be someone else. Not ‘his son’. His enemy. Green eyes stared back at the red ones as he panted, unsure if the monster was pleased.

It was furious, stepping forward as he shrank back and pulled his ghostly tail around himself. “I told you to get out.”

“I can’t.” He whimpered, wanting to look away but unable to.

Another voice behind him, the mom that wasn’t spoke. Yet he didn’t understand a word of it, too terrified by the being in front of him to even process it as language.

“Don’t lie to me Phantom. Get out of my son before we tear you out.”

His name made him flinch, gloved hands clutching at his head as the impossibility of that tore at his mind. “I’m not, I swear, I can’t get out of myself!” How could he not be in his son when he was his son? He had to find a way, his slowed but still pounding heart offering some idea.

“Don’t you dare pretend to be my son, ghost.”

He wanted to explain he wasn’t pretending, that he wasn’t disobeying on purpose but the massive thing had him by the collar of his jumpsuit, leaving him busy trying to breathe enough to speak. If he wasn’t a hybrid, then maybe the monster would be satisfied? He didn’t get much time to wonder before getting tossed in a containment cell. “I’m not pretending- the accident…” he mumbled, trying to make himself look smaller as if he could hide from the hateful eyes that way. They stared at him, spoke gibberish to one another as the previous exhaustion came back with a vengeance. Keeping still felt like the best idea. When the bigger one locked eyes with him and ordered that he sleep, he did.

Dreaming and waking became one and the same. He stayed in his cage unless ordered out. They kept asking him the impossible, until he tried to rip out his heart to ‘separate’ through death. They didn’t want their son harmed- didn’t see how separating was harm, but did not destroy him for that blunder. He hunted, brought them what they wanted. They kept watching as if expecting him to disobey, to slip his leash even as he practically groveled when they approached. He hoped Mom was okay, wherever she was. Maybe Jazz could rescue her from the monster with the cornet on spring break. A ghost couldn’t. A ghost simply obeyed.

Prompt: Danny hasn't been feeling himself, blacking out and having strange dreams. Unbeknownst to him, Freakshow's staff was not the only artifact that could control ghosts. Even worse, Jack and Maddie are the ones who get their hands on that object.