#and the 'oldest' is from summer last year

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I asked my mom not to invite my sister on vacation with us?

(submitted 5/26/24)

I (22X) have a lot of anxiety about politics (namely the upcoming presidential election and its potential consequences regarding my access to healthcare, among many other things). It started in 2016 and then just kept getting worse and worse as the years went on. I know that if I try to go about my day as normal on election night, I’ll most likely end up obsessively refreshing polling results and worrying myself into a panic attack (or several). So, I did a lot of research and planned a week-long vacation on and a bit after election day. It’s at a nice cabin a short drive away that’s all about disconnecting from phones and technology and reconnecting with nature. I figured because everyone in my family votes absentee already, me and my mom (56F) could go up together while my dad and my oldest sister (63M and 25F) would stay home because of work obligations and take care of our pets. My mom was really enthusiastic about the idea (especially because I went on a vacation with my dad last year, and it’s been a long time since her and I have had a parent child bonding trip), and she helped me finalize the dates and pay for the cabin. I’m in college and haven’t been able to find a summer job, but I’m still trying to save money to help cover the cost of food/entertainment/gas for the trip.

When we were booking, she talked about potentially inviting my sister (24F) on vacation too, as a family bonding thing. She moved out a year and a bit ago and is living with a friend, so my mom doesn’t get to see her all that often. But I really don’t want my sister to come along. Me and her haven’t gotten along since elementary school, and now whenever she visits I’m on edge the whole time. Plus, she has a very old special needs dog that she would have to bring with her that needs constant supervision, and his energy wildly varies between “sleeps in a ball all day” and “blindly runs around screaming and peeing everywhere and getting stuck like a roomba all day”. Which again, that’s very stressful to me. In addition, whenever my sister is over at our house, she always finds a way to bring up politics and wants to talk about current events (never the good ones, only the bad ones). Thankfully we agree on the important things (even if she leans a tad more towards the center than I do), but still. The whole point of this trip is to avoid having to worry about politics, and she always finds a way to bring it up. Plus, I just genuinely think she’d go stir crazy being cooped up in a cabin with me and my mom and poor cell service. There’s not a lot to do in the surrounding area besides hiking (she’s got a heart condition), a small Main Street with some shops that’s a 15 minute drive away, and a diner. It’ll probably just be reading, board games, and cards for a week straight.

Why I think I’d be TA: my mom and her don’t spend a lot of time together, and my mom is the one paying for the vacation. Even though I think she wouldn’t like glamping with us, my sister could still want to be invited and want to come along.

Why I think I wouldn’t be TA: I don’t think my sister would like being in a cabin with me and my mom for a week straight with no TV and poor cell service. My oldest sister is also not going on vacation with us due to work obligations, so they could have some sisterly bonding time while we’re away. Plus, the entire point of the vacation is to have a few days where I don’t have to dread election results, and I know my sister is going to want to talk about election results as soon as they start coming in.

So, would I be the asshole if I asked my mom not to invite my sister on vacation with us?

[mirrorthoughts]

First & Last Lines

Rules: Post the first and last lines of the last 10 fics you posted. WIPs are welcome. Not super strict!!

I was tagged multiple times, so thanks to my lovely mutuals @thotpuppy and @lucky-bishop!!

Not All Soup Is Soup - Teen Wolf, Steter, 2,992 words "So you finally decided to tell us that you're together?" - "Sleep, Stiles. And tomorrow we're going through that book together."

Mushroom Soup - Teen Wolf, Steter, 2,570 words Stiles loved the quiet days. - "Fucking hell!"

Inn of the Multiverse - Teen Wolf, Post-Steter, 8,162 words Year 7, Day 104 Current World: 217, Day 4 of 4* * remind residents they need to leave if they want to stay in this world - Stiles hoped he would.

Once is Chance, twice is a Coincidence, three times is a Pattern - Teen Wolf, Steter, 2,805 words Peter noticed the cat for the first time during a grocery run. - Catniss purred, still content in the arms of her human's lover.

I Can See What Could Be And I Want It - Teen Wolf, Steter, 32,980 words The first thing he noticed when he left behind the darkness was the warmth engulfing him. - And their future looked beautiful.

Pre-Canon, Secret Rituals, Presents - Teen Wolf, gen, 1,282 words "Scotty, hey! Hey, Scotty!" - "Of course, Scott! I'm sure we'll be best friends forever!"

Plants, Time Loop, Public Transportation - Original Story, Post-OC/ OC, 1,704 words When Sascha stepped into the subway he didn't think much of it. - "132."

How to woo your Jester - @oblivionsdream Original Story, Jester/Knight, 596 words "You've already given me flowers yesterday." - More beautiful than even flowers.

The little things - Teen Wolf, Steter, WIP, 11,382 words Stiles felt his dad's eyes stare into his back as he walked up the stairs to his room, still shaken from what had happened at the high school. - "After all now that he has lost his sister it would only be normal to want his last surviving family close to him, even take care of him himself, don't you think?"

Dead On Time - Teen Wolf, Steter, 11,725 words "Uncle Peter, Mum wants you to send these letters to the other packs!" - After all, he had a bit of time until he’d be gone for good.

Ooof, what a list 😂 that did take me a bit to collect all this! Also, lots of Steter 😂😂😂

Low-pressure tags for: @aurevell, @raett97, @whimsicalmeerkat, @dear-massacre, @tkwritesdumbassassins, @bucky-boychik-barnes and everyone else who wants to do this!

I have no idea who hasn't done that yet 😂😂

[binary5tar]

Ugh parenting is hard.

[seosracha]

OUR SUMMER- jake sim x reader

SYNOPSIS- after 4 long years, this was the end. This was the last summer before everyone went off to university , and to fully honor it, you all decide to make a bucket list, completing every point through the entirety of summer while also discovering feelings that were hidden for so long.

PAIRING- jake sim x fem!reader

GENRE- teen romance, friends to lovers, summer fling?, fluff, highschool/college au, oneshot

WORDCOUNT- 8k

WARNINGS- sexual jokes, alcohol use, underage drinking, suggestive content (no smut tho)!

PERM TAGLIST (and normal taglist)- @bubblytaetae @qghosty @viagumi @strwberrydinosaur @enhacolor @rendezrei @shinsou-rii @notrosemary @tocupid

You knew this was the last summer. You knew because after 13 hard, long and excruciating years of education, Jake finally got accepted into his dream college, leaving you alone in this sad, miserable town. 

As he was about to move on, live a happy, fresh, new life at university, you were going to be left all alone with your feelings for him. 

It was sad. But while he was here, you tried to enjoy every moment spent together.  It was also extremely hard to not just fly into his arms and tell him how much in love you really are. But your brother was always watching. He was always there. 

Lee Heeseung, your brother who you swore you hated, was the reason you got to meet Jake in the first place. They met in freshman year, when Heeseung decided to take soccer more seriously and actually pursue that career path. He would notoriously make fun of Jake for having pictures of soccer players plastered all over his walls. That's when Heeseung, Jake, Jay and Sunghoon became an inseparable friend group, doing quite literally everything together. 

You remember everything so well. You still laugh about the time when they watched The Conjuring, and got so incredibly scared, they couldn't even go to the toilet alone. Heeseung, being the oldest, would be some sort of watcher, bodyguard, standing still in front of the bathroom doors, as all of them took turns using the toilet. As disgusting as it was, it's a fond memory for both you and them. 

Heeseung used to always complain about you tagging along with them since you were a year younger than all of them, constantly latching onto them, but he got used to it. Jake was the only one who would always invite you in the beginning, and fight with Heeseung whenever complaints started spewing from his mouth. That was probably the first thing that made you fall for him. 

Heeseung chose a college in town, deciding to do pedagogics on the side while he still pursued his soccer career. Jay and Sunghoon also chose a college nearby, only one town away, meaning the three of them would always be here. 

Jake on the other side had some sick ambitions. When he set his mind on UCLA, he did everything in his power to get in. There was nothing wrong in that, but how could he leave them? How could he leave you? 

"Let's make a bucket list" Jay said as all of you, plus your best friend, Yunjin, hogged the living room couch in Jake's house. 

Another reason you didn't want Jake to leave. That damn couch. Everything in the 4 years of your friendship probably happened or started on that couch. 

"We make one every summer" Heeseung said, shoving some popcorn into his mouth "And always end up freestyling it" he added unclearly, hence all the food in his mouth. 

"You're disgusting," Yunjin inquired, pointing out Heeseung's disgusting habit. 

He just mumbled a 'fuck you' in response and shoved another handful into his mouth. 

"But this summers different, '' Jay said, reminding you once again that this was the last truly youthful summer your friend group would share. 

You knew very well that everything would change when they went away to college. Obviously, they could come home for summer, but new friends, a buzzing, new, shiny social life were only a couple of reasons for them to not visit so often when summer comes around next year. The adult life they were about to step into was only gonna allow them to finally party all night long, go on road trips across the country and meet people who they would prefer to spend all their time with. So Jay was right, this summer was different, cause it was the last one. 

"I'm down" Jake said, grabbing a pen and paper from the drawer. He passed it to Jay, who wrote a big, and definitely sloppy, 'OUR SUMMER'. 

"Skydiving" Sunghoon said excitedly, pitching in the first idea. 

"You know damn well" Yunjin said "Let's make it a tiny bit more realistic" Sunghoon just furrowed his eyebrows and continued to put on his thinking face. 

"Let's do a sleepover. You know, like the ones we'd do in our childhood. Blanket fort and all'' you said, turning your face to Jay, as he was the designated leader for this bucket list making. 

"I like that," Jake said, giving you a cheeky smile. 

You'd rather he be rude towards you than give you all these weird signals. None of the guys would  be as nice to you as he was. What man would agree with you on everything, bring you anything you wanted at any time, give you rides at the latest hour, handpick flowers for you on a random Wednesday and buy you things just because they reminded him of you, if he didn't like you like that. Yet still, you were too slow to catch on. 

"Sleepover. Blanket fort and all" Jay mumbled as he wrote down the first point to your list. "How about we drive down to that lake, get some beer, talk and shit?" he asked after he finished writing. 

"With your wackass, dodgy looking fake ID, I'm guessing" Yunjin said, laughing. 

"Give me some credit, it works every fucking time" Jay answered, pulling it out from his pocket. 

"Okay James Blunderbuss, write it down" Heeseung, said examining the ID "Anton really did you wrong with that last name" 

"Blackout drunk at Hanbin's birthday party" Sunghoon pleaded, pushing Jay to quickly write that down. 

"Do you really need an excuse to get drunk that bad?" you asked, and Sunghoon hurriedly nodded his head. You laughed and told Jay to write it down. 

"Kiss at least 20 sexy ladies," Heeseung said, puckering his lips. 

"No way" Jake shaked his head "You can go be a slut on your own" 

"Write down kiss Heeseung’s sister for Jake, cause I know he wants to so bad" Sunghoon laughed, emphasizing the 'so' part. 

Jake playfully pushed him with his elbow, visibly getting red. You tried to laugh it off, but deep down you knew how bad you wanted it, unlike Jake, who took it as a funny joke. 

"Let's do an early Secret Santa" Yunjin said. 

"Yo, that's gonna be dope. I'm gonna get you that pink vibrator we saw at the store yesterday" Sunghoon said, turning to Heeseung. They honestly thought it was so hilarious. 

"Not sure that's how it works, but i'll write Secret Santa down" Jay said

You all brainstormed ideas for the next hour. Some were honestly pretty bad, but the time you spent coming up with the list, will always be a good memory to you. 

*** 

Near the end of May, in a room eloped in extreme heat, covered with sheets that clanged onto your skin, with a faulty air conditioner running that tried to keep up with the temperature, your phone buzzed. 

Pulling you out of a trance, you quickly grabbed it hoping it was your delivery man, yet Jake's name decorated your home screen. It was getting late, the night crawling closer and closer, so the notification surprised you. You unlocked your phone hurriedly, wanting to see his message as fast as possible. 

Jake: You wanna go on a drive in an hour? 

If your brother wasn't home you'd honestly scream. 

What had gotten into him? You've been trying to send him signals for the past four years, and suddenly after all that time he'd picked up on them? Or was he just trying to be friendly, knowing well he wouldn't be here next year. 

You quickly replied with a 'sure' and got up to get yourself looking as pretty for him as possible. Maybe it was a little sad, the fact you were trying so hard for a man who didn't care, but it made you happy. 

"What you getting all dolled up for?" Heeseung laughed as he stood in your doorway. 

"Going out with Yunjin" you mumbled, delicately applying your lip tint. 

"In a miniskirt and full beat on your face? You ain't slick young lady" he pointed out. 

"We're taking photos for Insta. And this really isn't a miniskirt" you came up with yet another lie. 

You honestly had no idea why you were lying to him. He probably wouldn't bat an eye if you just said you're going out with Jake. He's too dumb to even think twice about it. 

"Can you just get out?" you turned to him, motioning for him to leave your room. 

He put his hands up chuckling, and closed your door. 

Your phone buzzed once again, signaling it was time for you to leave. 

He parked his car just around the street. Heeseung called him earlier asking to hangout, but he already had plans. With you. 

Obviously he couldn't tell Heeseung that, afraid your brother would blow up at him. If only he knew how dumb Heeseung really was when it came to stuff like this. He'd probably think you two are getting a surprise gift for him. 

"You look pretty" Jake smiled, as he got out to open the door for you. 

A light rosy tint decorated your cheeks, as you quietly thanked him. 

"Didn't you want to hangout with Hoon and Hee? I saw them playing Fifa when I was leaving" you asked the boy next to you. 

You couldn't help but stare at his face. He was so perfect in every way, so perfect you couldn't even put it into a cohesive sentence if you wanted to. 

"I'd rather hang out with my favorite girl," he smiled, taking his eyes off the road for a moment to look at you. 

"Woah okay, what about Rei then?" you questioned sarcastically. 

"You will never let that go, will you?" Jake laughed, reminiscing about his freshman year crush. 

"Well you were the one that couldn't stop yapping about her freshman year" you said, and he just put a finger to your lips, begging for you to stop talking about that embarrassing time in his life. 

Rei was a senior, and honestly you envied her so much back then. Even though she was so incredibly nice, you couldn't help but blame her for 'stealing your man'. 

"If you wanna talk so bad, we can talk about Jungwon" he inquired, turning the table on you. 

Jungwon was like your own Rei. Except this time, he was younger than you. 

"We really don't need to though" you pouted playfully. 

"Oh I really think we do though" he did the same "I was so jealous of him back then" he added with a small smile. 

"You were? Why?" you asked curious why The Jake Sim would be jealous of some random guy. 

The street lamps illuminated his face, making him shine brighter than ever. It still didn't feel real to you. Alone in a car with your older brother's best friend turned crush. 

"He was the only thing you talked about. I guess I just didn't really like that" he answered, a fabricated confidence evident in his tone. 

"Did you cry?" you asked with a pout. 

"Obvi" he answered with a wide smile, looking at you. "You're so pretty Y/n, I hope you know that. And Jungwon is an asshole for rejecting such a gorgeous girl" 

You believed he only said that to make you feel better about yourself, but it still made your insides swarm with butterflies. 

He had looked at you differently that day. Not different in a 'you really need to let me go' way, but a 'i wish we were something more' way. His demeanor had changed for everyday going forward, and you would lie if you said you didn't like it. 

***

"Why did Heeseung call me to ask if I'm hanging out with you?" Yunjin asked over the phone. 

She called you just minutes after Jake dropped you off home. 

"He wanted to check if I didn’t go hook up with some random guy probably" you answered, thanking god for such an intelligent best-friend that knew when to cover for you. 

"Well, were you hooking up with some random guy? Oh my god, please tell me it was Ricky, that senior" she asked “Or Song Eunseok! He’s so fucking sexy, to be honest” 

Yunjin had some odd obsession with Shen Ricky and Son Eunseok, seniors at your high-school. She loved finding people that she could treat as celebrities. 

"I wish. Jake just wanted to hang out, and I guess I didn't feel like telling him the truth" you answered, painting your nails a dark red color. 

"Did you two kiss?" Yunjin asked excitedly. 

She was the only one that knew about your feelings for Jake. She was pretty awful at keeping secrets but this is something she swore she'd take to the grave with her, unless you two didn't work out. 

"God no Yunjin, we didn't kiss. We just talked and got some food, nothing special" you answered chuckling. 

If only she knew how much you actually wanted to kiss him. His lips, so plump and soft, begging to be kissed. 

"If you ask me, I'd tell you to make a move on him," Yunjin said, voice calm. 

"I know, you've already told me that a million times. But you know he's going away, and even if somehow he did want me, it wouldn't work out with him being so far away" you honestly didn't believe in long distance relationships. How could one fully trust their significant other knowing he's thousands of miles away from you? 

"If anyone could make it work, it would be you two. But I don't want to pressure you into anything, just saying" she replied and you could feel the honesty in her tone. 

*** 

On the 8th of June, Sunghoon decided that the group needs to start preparing for Hanbin's birthday party and execute the second point of your shared bucket list. He's the only one that didn't mind getting sloshed on a random Thursday. 

"Do I really have to sit in the trunk?" Sunghoon asked, examining Jay's dirty trunk. 

"Count the seats in this car, and you'll have your answer" Jay replied, stuffing the blankets into the trunk "I'm even making it more comfortable for you" 

"Wow, thanks so much" Sunghoon mumbled, and with an angry expression got into the trunk. 

"You look like an idiot in there" Jake said walking out of his house with a various arrangement of everyone's favorite snacks "And I'm pretty sure that's illegal" 

"It's illegal only if they catch you" you said and covered Sunghoon with a thin white blanket. 

"That makes it so much less obvious" Jake laughed and got into the backseat of Jay's car "How's my baby doing in the back there?" he asked, turning around to take a look at Sunghoon. 

"Shut the fuck up" Sunghoon mumbled from under his blanket, and sticked out his middle finger. 

"I'm calling shotgun, Heeseung" Yunjin glared at the purple haired boy, and quickly sat on her reserved seat. 

"Are you really making me sit next to thing one and thing two over there" Heeseung asked his hand resting on the hood of the car in front of Yunjin. 

Yunjin just shrugged and connected her phone to the aux. Thank god she was the dj for this trip cause you wouldn't physically and mentally be able to handle two hours listening to 'Heeseung's handpicked UK drill mix'. 

Unlike others you liked the middle seat. It felt the closest to everyone in the car with great access to the beautiful view in front of the windshield. 

"If only Heeseung wasn't next to you" Jake whispered, as you sat down next to him. You smiled and playfully nudged his shoulder. 

"I can hear you" you heard Sunghoon's annoying voice behind you. You could also hear him playing the watermelon game. Sunghoon's screen time was for the most part that stupid game he wasn't even good at anyway. 

"First we have to hit up my good friend Yeonjun at the gas station. Please call me James Blunderbuss for now, I really need to get in the role" Jay announced as everyone already got comfortable in their designated seats. 

"No ones calling you that," Heeseung declared. 'James Blunderbuss' couldn't even get past your lips if you tried to. "Plus Yeonjun goes to our school you fucking dumbass" 

*** 

The dazzling, hot sun sets on your skin, a soft wind blows in your face as Jay opens up a bottle of beer for everyone. The cold glass cools you down. 

Something about this landscape and the surroundings was so refreshing and inviting. You've been here before, but this felt like a first. 

"Drink up fast Heeseung, we're playing spin the bottle" Sunghoon declares and takes a long sip of his beer. 

"You're a freak if you want me to kiss my own sister," Heeseung said with disgust in his voice. 

"Then you're not playing. More chances for me to kiss the beautiful ladies in front of me" Sunghoon beamed, and chugged down the rest of his bottle. 

"Can you sit or something for like one minute?" Jake asked, glaring at Sunghoon. 

Sunghoon rolled his eyes playfully and turned to Jay next with a pleading look in his eyes. 

"You fucking champ, chugged that bottle down like a pro. Good thing it was your last one for the next hour" Jay pouted, and continued scrolling through his playlist. 

"First y'all make me sit in the trunk, and now I can't even drink some beer in peace" Sunghoon grumbles, and lays down on the soft material of his blanket. 

"You going for a swim?" Jake turns to you, voice low. 

He didn't know what was happening to him. Ever since the realization hit him that this is your last summer together, he wanted to spend everyday with you. Even if you were to sit in complete silence, it's the fact that you're together which made his heart feel fuzzy and warm. 

You smiled and nodded "You want my beer Hoonie?" you asked Sunghoon who had already given up on his alcoholic dreams. His face lit up as he grabbed the bottle from you. 

Jake grabbed your soft hand, and dragged you towards the glistening water.

 You didn't exactly catch the moment when you fell for him. When you first saw a scrawny, Australian boy in your house, you well remember thinking he was just another one of Heeseungs dumb friends. Some things as simple as that made you question everything about your friendship with Jake. 

"Is it cold?" you asked, covering your eyes with the palm of your hand. Jake had already gotten in, and you'd noticed a slight disappointment in his expression. 

"A little. But I'll keep you warm if needed" he smiled and gestured for you to get in. 

You took off your blouse and pants quickly striding towards his toned figure. The water was indeed freezing (which was odd taking in account the warmth of that day), but Jake didn't let you get used to the temperature change, pulling you into his embrace as soon as you got close enough to him. 

"Is it that bad?" he asked with a wide smile. 

"Yeah, it is," you answered, your body trying to adjust to the water's temperature. 

His eyes were shining, tanned skin glowing under the sun's warm embrace. He had the brightest smile plastered on his face, and you just couldn't help but stare. 

"I wish you didn't have to go away," you hummed. 

"You are always welcome to come visit me in LA. Alone, with Yunjin, Heeseung, just hit me up" he replied calmly. 

You wondered how he could be so unbothered by this. He was about to embark on an individual journey, all alone in a big city, yet managed to remain calm. Or did he just not want to ruin it for everyone? 

"If you pay for my transport, sure" you gave him a small smile, and slowly started pulling him towards the land. 

"Anything for you" he replied, and you almost start to descend in the golden hope of his words. 

In a matter of 10 minutes, bottles managed to surround everyone on the sheer blanket. Jay, who was supposed to refrain from drinking, was tipsy beyond repair. Yunjin and Heeseung looked fine, Sunghoon was the problem. His alcohol tolerance was so bad that two beers managed to take him out. You wondered how he was going to survive Hanbin's long awaited birthday party. 

"I guess you'll have to drive tonight my boy" Heeseung beamed, turning his head towards Jake, and patting him on his his shoulder 

Jake just laid down on the blanket letting the hot ground and sun burn into his skin. 

He knew these were the last moments that he'd get to spend with everyone where everything will still be normal. Yes, he'd come back, his whole family is here, but it'd just be awkward and weird next summer. Everyone would have a different life, without one another. Next time, all of you will be different people. 

… 

“Who knew completing this bucket list would be so tiring,” Sunghoon said, throwing himself on the couch. 

It was the 13th of June. Today was the day everyone, especially Sunghoon, has been waiting for. Sung Hanbin’s 18th birthday party. 

So far you’ve completed only one thing, well unless someone has actually kissed ‘20 sexy ladies’, which you highly doubted. 

“Are you taking a piss, we’ve only done one thing” Jay answered angrily, looking Sunghoon up and down “Well unless Jake has finally kissed Y/n” he added with a slight laugh, looking over at you and Jake. 

Jake just rolled his eyes, and stuck his middle finger right into Jay’s face. 

“Can we seriously not talk about them, they’re disgusting,” Heeseung pleaded, hating the sudden romantic interest between you and Jake. He didn’t really take it seriously though. 

It seemed like everyone noticed something you two didn’t. Even though you’ve liked Jake for a while, you were fine with the fact that he would never reciprocate. But maybe you’ve just gotten so used to it, you couldn’t see through his actions. 

“Hanbin asked if we’re pulling up today,” Yunjin announced. 

“Why the fuck is my brother, my boy, my bae texting you and not me” Sunghoon suddenly rose from his comfortable position on the couch. 

“It’s because they’re fucking on the low” Heeseung answered, completely unbothered, scrolling through Youtube shorts on his phone. 

You knew very well that Hanbin and Yunjin have been talking for some time now, and to be completely honest, you thought everyone knew. But at the end of the day, you couldn’t really expect much from Sunghoon. 

“That’s bullshit, he prefers pretty girls” Sunghoon said smiling widely at Yunjin 

“Oh isn’t someone just so jealous I stole their boyfriend?” she answered, frowning sarcastically. 

Sunghoon just rolled his eyes and returned to his previous position. Yunjin laughed and since no one disagreed, she replied to Hanbin with a quick confirmation. 

“I can drive if y'all don't have a ride” Jake said, sitting next to you on the edge of the couch. Deep down he hoped Yunjin hadn’t already offered you a ride. 

“No thanks, I am not sitting in the trunk again” Sunghoon said, reminiscing on the back pain he had to endure after the lake trip. 

“As if I wanted to take you anyway” Jake replied, and turned his head towards you “What about you?” he asked, giving you a small smile. 

“Yunjin is already driving me. But you can come with us if no one needs a ride” you smiled, and he was about to say yes until an annoying voice filled the room. 

“My boy, who’s gonna go with you if not me?” Heeseung said, crushing Jake’s dreams in a second. 

Even though it wouldn’t be the two of you alone, the mere thought of watching you get ready, and walking into Hanbin’s house with you like you're all his, made him excited. His mind was making up the wildest scenarios, and he would lie if he said he didn’t like it. Something inside him has changed, and Jake had a seemingly hard time figuring it out yet. 

“Yeah sure” he nodded towards Heeseung, who was happy to score yet another free ride with Jake. 

….

“So what, are you gonna finally talk to Ricky or Eunseok, or is your precious little crush on Jakey holding you back again?” Yunjin asked, as the two were getting ready in your bathroom. 

You loved the girl but her nagging was like a punishment from the devil himself. She’s been begging you to ask out Shen Ricky or Song Eunseok ever since they just slightly smiled at you, or asked for your help. You never took any of those things seriously, but she seemed to see the situation differently. 

“Yunjin honey, they are not interested in me. Plus, isn’t Eunseok dating Kazuha?” you asked, trying to turn the attention away from you knowing Yunjin loves gossip more than anything else, and she probably knew all about their breakup. 

“They broke up two weeks ago. She cheated on him or something” she answered “So he’s single and ready for you” she added with a cheeky smile. 

‘Yeah sure, sure. Well, I’m still waiting for Jake so it’s going to be a no” you responded, hoping she’d just let go of the whole Ricky Eunseok thing. 

“Y/n you’ve been waiting for him way too long. I think it’s time to move on, literally so many cuter boys have asked you out and you’ve turned them all down. I don’t want to say you’ve been missing out, but you kinda have been.” 

“I know, Yunjin. But something just tells me it’s not over yet. If he doesn’t ask me out this summer I promise I’ll hit up Eunseok, or Ricky, or Anton, whoever you want” you answered, another attempt to just end the topic all together. 

“God, not Anton. Isn’t he like a Con Artist or something?” 

…. 

As the long road came to an end, you had yourself double checking the address, cause no way in hell Sung Hanbin lived in an apartment complex so luxurious. Everything about it, from the bodyguard standing still in front of the large metal gates, or the tall, perfectly clean windows. 

“You sure this it?” you asked Yunjin. It was stupid, she’s probably been here more than anyone else in the past month. 

“Nah, I just drove all the way out here for fun” she chuckled, and unbuckled her seatbelt, stopping the car. 

Another car had just pulled up next to you, the radio turned up to a max, music spilling from it. You shook your head, expecting it to be Jake and the rest of your friends. 

“Wonbinnie!” Yunjin screamed, racing towards the black vehicle. 

Yunjin wasn’t the type of girl to commit to any relationships. She liked a quick hookup, or the feeling of having more than one boy pinning for her. In some way you envied her confidence and mindset. 

“Y/n!” you turned to see Eunseok’s gorgeous face yelling out to you. You smiled and quickly made your way towards him. 

You couldn’t lie and say you didn’t like Eunseok just a little bit. He was such a sweet and caring person. Sometimes you wished he wasn’t so nice and handsome at the same time. He gave you a short side hug, and a pretty smile. 

“How have you been? I heard you and Kazuha are through” you asked, hoping it wasn’t too early for those type of questions. 

You waved at Seunghan and Anton who were stood behind him. 

“Yeah, honestly I don’t really care” he laughed, and you could see it was genuine. You guessed they weren’t that serious after all “I see your date has left you already” he said, looking around the parking lot. 

You turned around to see that Yunjin, along with Wonbin, was completely gone. 

“Yeah, cause your fuckass friend took her. Doesn’t he know her and birthday boy have a thing going on?” you asked, pulling him towards the gates. 

“Everyone knows,” Seunghan inquired, walking right behind you. 

…

To be honest, you didn’t really know Hanbin. He was practically a stranger to you, never getting to really interact with him outside of school. Knowing Sunghoon and Jake, two of his best friends, made you feel at least a little closer to him. 

“Yoo, look who showed up” Hanbin cheered, holding a red solo cup in his hand, greeting Eunseok with the other “I hoped your annoying asses wouldn’t pull up” he laughed, his tone laced with alcohol. 

They just laughed and handed him a bottle of whiskey, you assumed that was their idea of a good gift. 

“Happy to finally meet you, Y/n” Hanbin smiled at you, and put his hands up, signaling you to hug him, since his hands were already full. “I thought you’d come with Jake. Kinda surprised to see you pull up with these weirdos” you two laughed, and you let go of him, handing him yet another gift bag. 

“Aren’t they here already?” you asked, looking around his place. 

“Nah, Sunghoon probably did some stupid shit already, and they’re running late again” you fully believed that was the reason, a flood of odd memories with Sunghoon coming back to you. 

“Yall can help yourself to anything, it’s all in the kitchen” Hanbin motioned all of you to the kitchen, a wide variety of beverages waiting to be digested. 

You decided to text the group chat, a little concerned as to where they all went. All you got in reply was a picture of Sunghoon sitting on the toilet, face red. 

“I’ll go look for Yunjin, see you guys around’ you turned to Eunseok, Seunghan and Anton smiling. 

“Y/n! Before you go, Jay told me you’d be interested in a fake ID, you know, for a pretty girl like you I can make it 30$. Just hit me up” he smiled, pulling out his own counterfeit document. 

‘Nicholas Flubbernoodle’ 

“Mhm, sure. I’ll text you” you smiled and left them in the kitchen. What was wrong with him, seriously. 

The dining room wasn’t so crowded, only a couple people keeping a conversation going while sipping on some liquor. Guess this was their escape from the lively living room. 

“Have you seen Yunjin anywhere?” you questioned the black haired boy who sat opposite from you.

“She was just here, I think,” Gunwook answered, not-so-helpfully “You want some?” he asked, pulling out a half empty bottle of Vodka. 

“Sure” you answered, tired from searching for the only person you fully knew here. 

“You’re with Jake, right? Yall cute or whatever” Gunwook said pouring you a cup of Vodka with cranberry juice. 

“Nah” you said taking a large sip “Not yet though” you added. 

“Damn you like him and shit? He don’t wanna ask you out though, huh?” he questioned. 

You laughed. It was such a simple concept yet Gunwook was finding it so hard to understand. Yet it did make your heart beat faster when he initially thought you and Jake were dating. You looked over at the already empty cup next to you on the wooden table.

“The king is finally here” a faint voice you knew very well screamed into the crowd next door. 

Sunghoon finally beat death in your house's bathroom, it seemed. 

“You finally came!” you beamed as Jake’s pretty face appeared in the door frame.

You pat down the stool next to you, and he happily sat down placing his cup next to yours. 

“I’ll leave you guys at it” Gunwook said, standing up from his seat, pulling the boy next to him with him “Good luck, Y/n” he added and left the room. 

“What the fuck did that mean” Jake asked as his eyes followed the two boys out of the room. 

“He’s drunk, that’s all” you smiled “Half an hour late, not cute Jake” you added quickly. 

He laughed and pulled out his phone. With a few swift clicks he showed you a video of Sunghoon begging for mercy on the toilet. By the way he’s screaming you’d think he was getting brutally tortured. 

“We gave him spicy noodles with a shit ton of lactose,” Jake laughed. 

“Isn’t he like intolerant” you laughed, replaying the video one more time. “He’s never gonna live this down” you added and handed the phone back to Jake. 

You spotted the juice and vodka Gunwook had left behind “You want some” you said pointing your head towards the bottles. 

Jake nodded and chugged down his drink to make space for something else. You reached over for the bottles, and poured it in his empty cup. 

“This is nice,” he said after taking a sip. The alcohol burned his throat a little bit, but he’s gotten used to it by now. 

“Well no duh. Made by a girl like me, so obviously it’s nice” you smiled and poured yourself another cup. 

“A hot girl, right?” he slurred, and looked at you “You look so good in that dress”

“You bought it for me after all” you smiled, trying to contain yourself from doing something you’d regret. 

“And you’re letting other guys see you like this? Should’ve kept it for me and only me” he moved closer to you. 

You knew it wasn't the alcohol making him act like this. He’s only had two drinks after all. 

“And why would I do that, mmh?” you asked, with a sly smile, riling him up just a tiny bit more. 

“Cause you're mine, yeah? All of this is mine” his eyes scanned you. 

You felt his breath down your neck, and that’s when the self restraint you had flew out the window, as you pressed your delicate lips against his plump ones. Your heart heaves uneasily as you give into his soft touch, hands pressed against your hips, as he pulls you closer to his chest. 

The kiss was lustfull, full of built up feelings that’ve been stored up in your hearts for ages. His lips were like a magnet; just when you thought it was over they pulled you back in for more. He tasted like vodka and cherry chapstick, and you just couldn’t resist him. 

“Fuck, no one can make you feel this good. Only me, remember that” he said breathlessly, holding you up against his chest. “Don’t tell anyone about this, yeah? It can be our little secret” he said, planting kisses down your neck. 

“Mmh” you answered out of breath, your nails digging into his back. 

“I guess another point of the bucket list completed for me” Jake muttered. 

“Vivienne Wooblegooble, what do you- What the fuck” Anton beamed, walking into the dining room. 

… 

It’s been two weeks since Hanbin’s birthday party. And you kept your promise. Apart from Anton who desperately wanted to sell you a fake ID, nobody knew. You were good at keeping promises and secrets. 

It didn't quite hit you when it happened. Maybe because some part deep inside you expected it to happen. Or maybe because you subconsciously we're preparing for that moment to finally come. No matter what it was, you didn't care. You could finally enjoy having Jake all to yourself. 

You found it fun, the fact no one knew. Your brother, Lee Heeseung, had a head of bricks, not even budging when he caught Jake leaving your room, alone, in the middle of the night. He just dapped him up, and asked if he wanted to play Fifa. 

But everyday you were getting closer to the start of the school year. That meant that not only everyone would leave, but most importantly, Jake was going to leave. 

“My boys, we gotta go hunting. Twenty sexy ladies won’t kiss themselves” Heeseung announced as all of you, alongside Hanbin and Anton, gathered to watch movies at your house. 

“This is exactly why you have never seen a woman naked” Yunjin commented, and once again averted her attention to the TV. 

“That’s lame as fuck. I’m not doing it” Jake said, focused on the movie playing in front of him. 

“Can someone tell me what’s gotten into him suddenly” Jay asked, a weird look on his face as he turned to Jake. 

Jake tried to laugh it off, hoping he can just make up a stupid excuse to not go ‘hunting’, but Jay persisted. It wasn’t the first time, since Hanbin's party, that Jake has been making up excuses to not go hang out with different girls. 

“I’m just trying to look for something serious. Plus I’m tired of hoeing around, Jay” Jake answered, and to be completely honest, it was the worst excuse you’ve ever heard. 

“Well you’re no fun” Heeseung said, picking up his keys “Boys, we have a mission to complete. Without his horse looking ass” he added, pointing to Jake. 

“Hanbin, you not coming?” Sunghoon asked, but quickly noticed Yunjins grasp on the boy's arm, “Oh, I see, you’ve become a kiss ass just like Jake” he laughed and took a zoned out Anton with him. Hanbin just muttered a quick ‘fuck off’, and continued to entertain your bestfriend. 

You heard the door shut, with that, loud screams coming from outside. 

“We’ll leave you guys alone maybe, no one’s coming anytime soon, so do whatever you want” you smiled at Hanbin and Yunjin, leaving to go upstairs with Jake. 

The staircase creaked under your feet, as you quickly pulled Jake to your room. You knew that your friends downstairs would easily entertain themselves alone. He smiled as you pulled him inside, he drew you closer to his body, heat radiating off him. 

“I’m impressed, they’re gonna flame you later for that, you know?” you said, sitting down on his lap, as he placed himself on the edge of your bed. 

“I really don’t care. All I need is this” he gave you a sly smile, eyeing you down. 

You smiled, and hugged him tightly, enjoying every second you got to spend with Sim Jake. Maybe this was gonna end up just like any other summer fling, but that didn’t matter. You had him now, and you weren’t gonna waste that. 

“God, I wish I told you earlier, maybe we’d have more time together” he said, his hands wandering on your back, as he tried to close any room between your bodies. 

“We don’t have to worry about that now” you said, removing yourself from the crook of his neck to look at him “You just have to promise to call me everyday. And visit whenever you can, okay?” you asked, and he happily nodded his head. 

… 

Keeping secrets from your brother was fun. You’d do it all the time. Seeing his reaction when he did actually find out, was the funniest thing ever. Although real, he'd have the wackiest reaction ever, expression close to the ones in fake 3am youtuber pranks calls. 

But this time it was different. 

Heeseung had come home early from soccer practice, you didn’t even hear him come in. He had wanted to surprise you with some sweet treats, knowing you were sick. But he had been welcomed with an even better surprise. 

Jake wanted to cheer you up knowing you weren’t feeling your best, and since no one was home, you invited him over. Heeseung wasn’t supposed to be home until late. 

So that’s when for the first time in your life, your brother had sat you down to have a serious talk. 

“How long has this been going on? Ever since you met him? How could I be so stupid to not notice? Oh my fucking god Y/n, why didn’t you tell me?” he asked thousands of questions at once, and you didn’t even know which one to answer first. 

“Heeseung stop freaking out. It’s only been a couple of weeks” you said, not even being able to look at him. You didn’t want to see an expression of disappointment on your brother's face, all because of you. 

“And I’m guessing no one knows?” he asked, and to your surprise his tone was calm. 

“Anton does, he caught us while trying to sell me a fake ID” you answered, as stupid as it sounded, you had to keep a serious face on. 

“That fucking wackass scammer. What name did he come up with for you?” Heeseung asked, and that’s when you finally had the confidence to look up at him. 

“Vanessa? Or Vivenne Wooblegooble. Something like that” you laughed slightly, and so did he. 

“God can’t he just come up with something normal for once. Mine was Ethan Flapdoodle, but he wanted me to pay 100$ for that shit” he laughed, and turned his whole body towards you “Look Y/n, I’m not one to decide what you do, you know? But I just hoped you’d tell me about something like this” he added, and gave you a small smile. 

“I know Hee, I’m sorry. I should’ve told you” you said. 

“Don’t be sorry. Jake is like for real, my best friend. Like you know, brother from another mother and shit. So I’m glad it’s him and not that knob Eunseok or something. Seunghan told me ya’ll we’re up to something” he voiced with a chuckle “I’m happy it’s Jake actually, he’s a really good fucking dude. Like for real, and you know that too” 

You smiled at his answer, and for the first time in a while, hugged your brother. He was surprised but hugged you back, tighter than ever. 

“How long have you liked him?” he asked, his voice muffled by the material of your sweatshirt. 

“Like four years” you answered, and he quickly pulled out of the hug, and that idiotic expression decorated his face. 

“Damn you’re loyal as fuck” he said, shocked. 

“Now tell me what’s wrong with Eunseok” you questioned, since all the signs so far pointed to Song Eunseok being a good match for anyone. 

“Yunjin probably told you that Kazuha cheated on him, right? Yeah that’s bullshit, Kazuha called him since he couldn’t find his phone, and saw herself saved as ‘Girl 4’. Turns out he had like 8 of them” he answered “And then that dumb fuck had the audacity to brag about it to us, saying some shit along the lines of ‘Oh I guess I gotta go find a replacement for Girl number 4’” he added, with a horrendous impression of Eunseok. 

You felt bad for believing the fabricated story everyone had passed on about Kazuha, making a mental note to tell Yunjin about the truth later. 

“Anyways, here’s some medicine and your favourite snacks, I hope you feel better so my little sister can smooch Jake again soon” he said, getting up from your bed. “Not thrilled to find out this way, but I’m happy for you two. I’m not gonna tell everyone else though, you should do it yourself” he said with a slight smile, stepping out of the room. 

That’s how your dumb brother found out. And honestly, it couldn’t have gone any better. 

… 

The summer had gone by in a blink of an eye. The memories you made were going to stay with you forever. 

You had eventually told everyone about you and Jake, and it shocked you to see that no one was really that surprised. Well expect Yunjin who stalled you on a phone call for three hours to ask you millions of questions. It was nice to know someone cared. And it was nice to know that people you treated like siblings supported you more than anyone. 

You had finished the bucket list a week before school started again, a week before everyone had to move out. 

Jake had already sent out most of his stuff to his new roommate in Los Angeles, leaving a couple things behind for you. 

Sunghoon and Jay had moved out a little earlier than you thought they would. The first time you had visited them in their new apartment, you were surprised by how ugly it was. But finding out Sunghoon picked it cleared everything up for you. 

Heeseung decided to stay home, since it made no sense for him to move out. You could lie and say you hated it, but in all honesty you were happy. At the end of the day he was your older brother. Your older brother who you loved more than you’d like to admit.  

Yunjin’s idea, Secret Santa, was probably the best thing on that bucket list. 

When you opened the box to find a jar of gherkins and used up lotion, you knew who picked the paper with your name. You had picked Jay, gifting him a Paris Saint-Germain jersey and a gift card. 

The blanket fort sleepover at Yunjin’s house turned out to be a disaster. No one could fall asleep in the neatly built fort, because Sunghoon’s snoring problem had everyone up till 6AM begging for it to stop. 

The bonfire Seunghan had hosted was also a shining memorie that you knew you’d look back on until next summer. You didn’t expect to get close with so many new people this season, but you guess the distance that was about to separate you actually brought all of you closer. 

Anton had begged you then to purchase the fake document since he had already made it, and you didn’t have the heart to say no to him,  the pleading look on his face pulling you into his scam gig. Guess this was his trick to get everyone involved in his illegal business. 

You spent the last week hanging out, having deep talks (which was honestly extremely rare), and looking back at old photos from past summers. It was sweet, seeing everyone so grown up. 

“Look at your uglyass outfit. You loved that shirt so much” you pointed out. 

You played with Jake’s hair as he lying down in between your thighs. It had grown a lot, and you honestly liked it more than you thought you would. 

“There is quite literally nothing wrong with it. All the ladies loved it” he protested, chuckling. 

It was horrendous. 

“Whatever you say. I’m just glad you stop wearing these tacky tie dye t-shirts” you said, scrolling through the album again. 

“Look at Yunjin! You called me ugly, but she looks like a virgin loser in this one” he called out and you slapped his arm for even having the audacity to offend your best friend like that. 

“At least someone had a glow up” you answered, and scrolled once again. 

“But you liked me. Even with the tie dye minion shirt” he smiled, and turned over to look at you. 

“And I still like you. But a little less without the minion shirts” you replied, a smile on your face. 

“So do you like them or nah? Cause I think I still have them” he questioned with a curious expression on his face. 

“If you like it then I like it too, I guess” you answered, and he moved up a little to be at level with your face. 

“Then I like you. More than anything else in this world. Even more than the minion t-shirt” he said, honesty lacing his tone, a pretty smile decorating his face. 

You grabbed his face, and placed a sweet kiss on his forehead. 

“Remember what you promised me?” you asked, as he lied back down, still facing you. 

“Enlighten me once again, please?” he said, nervous you wouldn’t like the fact that he forgot. But you just laughed. 

“You promised to call me everyday. And visit, anytime you could” you told him once again, and he smiled, the memory coming back to him. 

“You got it baby” 

And so he did. He called every day. He visited anytime he could. He was there every time you needed him. Cause he was yours. He was your Jake Sim, and that summer was yours truly. 

[ellecdc]

Soooo, I'm not the usual requester of the poly!moonwater x reader, but I fell I love with them and the way you write them!

With that being said, could I request Mia and Monty taking in Regulus and reader, saving them from their cruel families, and the holidays being absolutely hectic with everyone there.

Maybe some Mia and reader bonding?

If not that's fine! All my love,

🦕

*gasps* thank you lovely! I'm so glad you've loved moonwater enough to submit a request!!! sorry this took so long, I had this half finished and couldn't figure out for the life of me how to wrap it up happily, and then I was like "of course! Effie!" - not so much chaos but a lot of hurt/comfort and fluff

~please note: my requests are currently closed as I work through my older ones~

poly!moonwater x fem!reader

CW: toxic/abusive family dynamics, mentions and insinuations of abuse, your parents suck in this - I'm sorry, but just call me Euphemia Potter because you're all my children now

Remus had to admit that he was getting increasingly worried about you and Regulus the closer it got to the summer holidays. It seemed that no matter how much brighter the weather became outside, clouds were determined to follow the two of you around.

Remus only knew why Regulus would perhaps grow tense at the thought of returning to 12 Grimmauld Place on account of Remus’ years’ long friendship with Sirius. But the youngest Black, since reconciling with his older brother, has staunchly refused to discuss family life. Remus could accept that; he understood the gist.

But you, he was at a loss with. Though, he would admit that your occasional flinch at a raised hand or sudden quick movements by either Regulus or Remus spoke volumes on that end.

So here you all were (being Remus, you, Regulus, Sirius, James, Peter, and Lily) sitting by the Black Lake and enjoying the sun on one of the last few days of the school year, and you and Regulus were nearly comatose in your melancholy. 

Lily and Peter were doing their best to pretend they didn’t notice any tension in the group as they busied themselves with a game of wizarding chess, but James and Sirius had no such qualms and were staring hard between Remus and Regulus. 

“I told you that you could come with me, Reggie.” Sirius said surprisingly softly for the oldest Black. Regulus’ jaw twitched as he stole a fleeting glance at James.

“You told me that a year ago. I wasn’t smart enough to go then, I don’t see why I’d deserve that option now.” He muttered, sounding disturbingly more and more like the aristocratic Pureblood he was raised to be.

“It’s not about deserving, Reg.” Sirius said at the same time Remus said, “of course you do.”

“Honestly,” James interjected, “at this point, my mum would be pissed if you didn’t come live with us.”

Regulus’ face appeared to remain impassive, but Remus knew better; there were signs. His jaw tightened, there was a small movement in his left eyebrow and a subtle glossiness in his eyes.

Suddenly his gaze flit to Remus, his eyes almost begging him to understand something he hadn’t yet voiced. Remus held Regulus’ gaze until his eyes turned to something else; to you.

But it didn’t appear that you had heard any of the conversation going on around you; your eyes pointed to some unmarked point in the horizon, your mind far away.

“I can’t leave her.” Regulus whispered once he knew you wouldn’t hear.

“What’s the point of both of you suffering, Regulus? You can’t help her from Grimmauld Place.” Sirius argued. 

Regulus finally groaned, and Remus’ heart clenched knowing how close he was to frustrated tears. Remus felt just as close, feeling completely helpless in this situation. But his parents struggled enough supporting him alone. He knew that if he asked, his mum would have the two of you in a heartbeat, but the Potter’s had the space and funds to do it far more easily. 

“Y/N can come too.” James said plainly.

“Hm?” You hummed quietly, turning your attention back to the group at the sound of your name.

Regulus grimaced slightly but James, either ignorant to body language or choosing to ignore it carried on. “I was just thinking, we’re inviting Regulus to move in with us for the summer. Perhaps you could join us?”

You stared hard at James without breaking eye contact and Remus grew more and more tense the longer you stayed silent.

“It’s good that Regulus is staying with you.” You commented, sounding nearly robotic.

“You could-” Remus began, but you cut him off.

“Don’t, Remus.”

“Amour.” Regulus pleaded quietly.

“Leave it.” You ordered before standing and walking away. 

Regulus sighed and buried his face in his hands. Remus couldn’t stand it anymore and moved to sit beside him, rubbing soothing swipes up and down his spine.

“Your brother is right, love. You’ll be more help to her if you’re safe at Potter Manor. You need to be brave for the both of you right now.”

“She’s never told me either, you know?” Regulus spoke from inside his hands. “I have no idea what happens when she leaves here.”

Remus fought back the tears that threatened to infiltrate his eyes. “You’ll be more help to her from Potter Manor.” He repeated.

You’d been avoiding the boys, that much was certain. And even if you weren’t avoiding them, it was like you weren’t even there when you were sitting right next to them. Remus hated to think that this was the note you were all leaving on, knowing you’d not see each other again until September first. 

Regulus had agreed to stay with the Potters, though he refused to discuss with anyone what was said to his parents (or, perhaps more importantly, what his parents had said in return). 

So, they stood there in Central Hall with their bags and school trunks; James and Sirius arguing over what they were going to do first when they got to the Manor (in an attempt to hopefully lighten the mood for Reggie's sake) while Remus stared at Regulus’ face without pretending that he wasn’t, as his boyfriend stood painfully rigid.

You appeared then, the strap of your duffle bag thrown over your shoulder and your school trunk trailing behind you. Remus didn’t think he’d ever seen you look so forlorn.

It was like a switch was flipped in Regulus, and he went from a soldier standing at attention to cooing over your shorter frame.

“Let me get this, amour. Did you get everything packed okay?” He asked you softly, pulling your duffle bag gently from your shoulder to throw over his own. You barely nodded in acknowledgment, eyes staring at the ground unseeingly. Remus felt sick to his stomach.

“Okay.” Regulus murmured at you quietly, giving Remus a quick shake of his head as he went to move to you. Remus had this overwhelming urge to pick you up and huddle you under his arm, not letting go until you were all the way to Wales – where your family couldn’t get to you.

But Regulus perhaps understood your mindset better than he did.  

“Can Rem take your trunk for you?” Regulus asked, mostly as a means to invite Remus into the conversation and less trying to get him to be your pack mule.

“No.” You said as firmly as you could manage in this fragile state. “I’ve got it. Thank you, though.” You said, finally looking up to make eye contact with Remus and Regulus. 

Regulus, for his part, managed to smile sadly at you. Remus was sure his discontent was written all over his face.

“Ready to get this show on the road? Look at me, sounding all muggle.” Sirius called. One would think he sounded indifferent to what was going on, but Remus (and Regulus) could see this for what it truly was: distraction.

“No.” You whispered.

“What is it, lovie?” Remus asked, turning his attention quickly back to you.

“I’m not, I-” you took a few quick breaths, face scrunching up painfully as your eyes filled with tears. “I’m not ready, I can’t. I can’t go. I’m not...”

“Okay.” Regulus said softly.

“I can’t go back, I can’t - I’m not ready.”

“That’s alright.” Sirius offered just as softly. 

You were disturbingly close to hyperventilating – surveying your surroundings like you were looking for a place to run, looking for a way out. “I can’t do it anymore, I can’t.” You cried.

“Then don’t, love.” Remus pleaded. And you broke down into sobs. 

Something inside Remus snapped and he made for you, enveloping you in a hug that was probably far too tight, but you nuzzled impossibly further into his chest anyway as if he could perhaps hold your pieces together as you fell apart.

He’d find a way to do it for you if that’s what you truly needed.

As your gasping sobs ceased and your breathing evened into only the occasional hiccup, James let out a theatrical “Phew.”

“What?” Regulus asked, voice somewhat taut from both protectiveness and frayed nerves. 

“I sort of told my mum she was coming to live with us, anyway.”

Remus could have kissed the sod right on the mouth at that moment. He opted to kiss the top of your head instead. 

“I don’t want-”

“-to be in the way. You won’t be, amour.” Regulus interrupted your train of thought, voice far softer than the one he’d used with James.

“Yeah, Regulus is far more inconveniencing than you are, dollface.” Sirius snarked with a wink, earning him a quick stinging jinx from Regulus. 

If Remus had thought that the hard part was over in Central Hall, he was very wrong.

You had settled not too badly as you all rode the wagons to the train station holding onto Remus’ hand like a vice, and Regulus appeared to be far more comfortable now that he was less worried about you. Regulus undeniably had some abandonment issues, and the thought of going to the Potter’s without you left him with the sense that he would somehow be letting you down. Remus supposed that at least before, the two of you could commiserate together knowing that whatever you were going through, so was the other.

But as the group travelled on, some of your own tension returned the closer you got to Kings Cross Station. 

“You don’t have to say anything to them, you can just leave with us.” Sirius said plainly as Remus reached to grab your bags from the overhead compartment.

“That’d be considered kidnapping.” You responded quietly.

You hooked your duffle over your shoulder and stood, looking through the compartment as if you could somehow see your family through the sheets of metal separating you and Platform 9 ¾.

“Would...would you like us to come with you? Stand by your side? How would you like to do this, love?” Remus asked, leaning back slightly so he could see your face directly. 

You seemed to ponder that for a few moments before returning his gaze. “Maybe...maybe you guys could just, stay a little behind me? Not close enough to say anything or for them to say anything to you, just...”

“Close.” Regulus finished for you. You nodded in response.

“Consider it done, dove.” Remus said and pressed a kiss to your forehead. 

James and Sirius spotted the Potter’s quickly after exiting the train and brought your bags and trunks to them so that the Potter’s elves could bring them to the Manor. You watched as your trunk disappeared with a pop; there was no going back now. 

“Y/N.” An indifferent tone called, causing you to stand up straighter, though you didn’t seem ready to turn your gaze towards it yet.

“We’re right here, amour. We’re not leaving without you.” Regulus insisted. Remus wanted to touch you, grab your hand, kiss your cheek, but he knew he’d have to wait until you felt safe.

Safe.

Soon you’d be safe.

True to their words, Regulus and Remus followed you towards your parents who stood poised like models in a Victorian Era portrait, staring down at you over their noses, though the two boys paused a good distance away as you had asked them too.

“I hate this.” Regulus murmured as you said hello to your parents. Your mother turned to leave before you asked them to wait.

“We’ll be able to take her home after this.” Remus placated, but it did nothing to soothe his own nerves either. 

“You’re doing what?” He heard your mother ask derisively. 

You repeated yourself, albeit quieter and more meekly than you had before. Remus wanted to hex her for making you feel so small.

“Absolutely not. Get your things.” Your father barked.

You raised your hand carefully, pointing towards the Potter’s to explain that they’ve already brought your things to their house.

“You insolent little witch. How dare you undermine me like this.” Your father spat and took a menacing step towards you. You stepped back quickly with a full body flinch, and that was it for Remus.

“We’re done. Let’s go.” Remus said authoritatively. “Come on, dove.” 

You needn’t be told twice, allowing Reg to steer you towards the Potter’s as Remus cast a quick muffliato around you to spare you from any trailing remarks your parents made. 

Remus and Regulus exchanged a worried glance over your head as you kept your eyes glued to the floor, letting yourself be guided blindly through the platform.

“Ready to go, dearies?” Euphemia Potter asked kindly, softly, as she beamed at the five students in front of her with Fleamont at her side. Even Remus felt like he had whiplash at the difference of atmosphere on this end of the platform; he couldn’t imagine how you or Reg were managing. 

“Hello, cariad!” Remus heard his mother call before any of you could answer Effie’s question. He turned his gaze to see his parents, Hope and Lyall Lupin, move through the crowds towards them.

“Gangs all here now!” Lyall called, and you tightened your hand currently enclosed safely in Remus’. He gave your three quick squeezes in return: a silent promise of safety. 

“This must be Regulus and Y/N!” His mum cheered, looking awfully close to embracing both of you. However, Regulus’ aristocratic upbringing appeared to save the day as he quickly stepped in front of you and stuck his hand out, bowing politely to her.

“Mrs. Lupin, it’s very nice to finally meet you.” He said, posh accent on full display.

Remus gave a pleading look to his family, knowing his mother was the kind to say “oh, I’m really more of a hugger.”

But apparently, one thing motherly love was very good at was reading the room, and his mum accepted the handshake before his dad, Effie and Monty all got one of their own. You nodded politely and exchanged a quiet ‘hello’ but opted to stay glued to Remus’ side.

He couldn’t say he minded that option entirely. 

Euphemia Potter was no stranger to troubled children showing up at her doorstep, but she couldn’t help but admit how different this time was.

Last year, Sirius showed up battered, beaten, bloodied, and bruised, not to mention completely scared out of his mind. And underneath all of that was this horrible fear for his younger brother’s safety, as well as an overwhelming sense of guilt for leaving him behind.

Sirius never really recovered from feeling like a burden, not last summer at least. He remained entirely too polite for Effie’s tastes, full of “thank you, Mrs. Potter”’s or “that really isn’t necessary”’s right up until the day she sent them off to Hogwarts.

“Now boys.” She said, giving the two troublemakers as stern a face as one Euphemia Potter could muster. “Though I would certainly prefer no trouble at all, can we at least promise not to get quite as many detentions this year? And for the love of Merlin – no more broken bones! I like that when people ask me how my sons are, I can at least say ‘well, at least they’ve got their health!’”

Effie was certain that the pressure behind Sirius’ eyes from fighting the tears must have been excruciating, but he held out for as long as he could before he launched himself into her chest. 

“Thank you, Effie.” He finally whispered through tears.

“Please, Sirius.” She whispered as she stroked the boy’s hair. “Call me mum.”

If last year was full of guilt, grief, and fear, this summer seemed to be full of caution, hope, and love.

Where James spent last summer trying to keep Sirius in as high spirits as possible, this year he got to simply play the role of host. Where Sirius spent last summer trying to stay out of the way and convince himself and everyone around him that he was completely fine, this year he got to show his brother what real family looked like.

And though he saw a lot of Sirius in Regulus, there was so much that was so distinctly him.

Regulus’ trauma came out in impeccable table manners, speaking in a manner far more suited to a member of parliament than a teenaged boy at a casual meal, and assessing the atmosphere in the room with the efficacy of a social weather man. 

But his personality was completely contradictory. 

He made jokes and comments that he didn’t seem to realize were funny until people around him laughed, which caused him to blush but let out surprised laughter of his own. Where Sirius’ jokes were performative and always for the sake of amusing the people around him, Regulus’ humour came naturally and unbiddenly. Where Sirius showed his love and excitement as loudly as possible in order to make sure everyone around him got to share in it, Regulus dutifully handed out his love and excitement in carefully curated doses. 

She loved them both beyond measure.

And you...well, Effie could certainly see how you managed to win over not one but two of her favourite young men. Your trauma seemed to come out in the form of fading into the background. Everything you did, you did quietly. You never asked for anything, whether it be for seconds at dinner, something to drink during the day, or to go into town to shop for supplies.

But even though you were clearly struggling, Effie could see how much you cared for those boys both actively and passively. Your body language seemed to change the second either of them entered a room, their presence’s easing any discomfort you may have been feeling nearly immediately; you smiled brighter, made more eye contact, and even contributed to conversations when one of them was around. Right now they were your confidence, your safe space. Effie hoped to get the chance to see it for herself one day, but she felt unbelievably lucky to get to see it in this way too. 

You always showed up with bottles of water when the boys were outside playing quidditch, somehow knowing Regulus was the kind to completely miss any cues his body gave him of thirst and predicting his needs. And you always brought sunblock out unprompted when Remus would fall asleep with a book over his face, ensuring he wouldn’t burn in the sun. 

She loved you so much.

It had been about two weeks since summer holidays started, and Hope and Lyall Lupin were going to be leaving their mini holiday at Potter Manor in a few days when Effie felt that you had made enough progress to broach the subject. 

“Y/N, dearie. Do you have a moment?” She asked as you and the boys walked in the back door after spending some time down at the lake.

Effie noticed a flicker of concern cross your features, though you readily agreed nonetheless. Remus smiled while Regulus promptly stood at attention.

“Hope’s going to be leaving in a few days, and I was thinking perhaps we could get a shopping trip in before she does.”

At this Hope looked over with a beaming smile. “Oh! I’d so love to go shopping! The shops are not nearly as posh in Cardiff.” 

You looked between the two women uncertainly but began nodding your head. “Erm, yes, sure. What...what are we shopping for?”

“Well, I thought we could go shopping for some clothes.”

You looked absolutely horrified at this. “I have clothes! I brought everything I had from school.”

Effie smiled encouragingly at you. “Yes, and what you had packed for school was appropriate for a Scottish autumn and winter, not for a summer in London.”

Sirius, never one to leave very well alone, piped up at this. “I want to go shopping! Can I come?”

Hope chuckled and ruffled the boy’s long hair. “I think it’d be better just us ladies, hm?”

Sirius pouted at that, but Regulus took pity on his brother. “You can come with me and Fleamont, Sirius.”

Sirius stood abruptly and planted a smacking kiss to the younger boy’s cheek. “You’re officially my favourite sibling.” He declared, earning him an indignant ‘oi!’ from James. 

“Get off of me, you sod.” Regulus grumbled, leaning further into Remus’ side. 

You looked at your two boys then; Remus was smiling at you with a look so full of love and pride it nearly rivaled Effie’s, and Regulus was smiling encouragingly and so sweetly, Effie was certain her blood sugar levels spiked just at the sight.

“That...that would be very nice. Thank you, ladies.” You agreed quietly. You nodded your head in decision, mostly to encourage yourself but Effie was thankful for the effort.

It was hard to imagine a time nearly eighteen years ago that Effie and Monty were heartbroken and struggling to finally have a child of their own. If only they’d know that seventeen years later, their lovely, lovely boy would bring home four more for them to love.

She was simultaneously sad for you, Regulus, and Sirius that you had to grow up in homes that didn’t love you the way you ought to have been, but she was so beyond grateful she got the honour to love you properly, now and for the rest of her life.

As long as Euphemia Potter lived, none of you would ever spend a moment being anything but loved.

[mvltisstuff]

meet me at our spot - c.f

summary: after a text from conrad asking y/n to come over, she could never say no.

conrad fisher x reader

a/n: soooo i’m like a year late to the tsitp game… but i just finished it and i cried like a baby omfg and conrad’s #1 protector!!

conrad (10:45 PM)

come over, i’m on the dock

the second the notification popped up on her screen, she was out of bed. she was dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a tank top, laying in bed but not being able to sleep. she’d been the one to paint a smile on conrad’s face this summer, and susannah knew that. she was happy to have y/n over whenever she could, noticing oldest son’s face light up when she walked in.

y/n was conrad’s soldier. she fought battles for him when he felt like he was too weak to do it himself. he cried on her and his best days were spent with her. the second they kissed last summer, he knew they were in it for the long run. no one could point out a cause for conrad’s recent misery. all they wanted to do was find a light for him in this tunnel. y/n was well aware that he had been struggling. he wasn’t opening up, but she knew that just being there next to him in bed was enough for him. no one has ever gone through the trouble of loving him so much, instead of just reaching over for a condom. he felt trapped everywhere he went, and the dock is where he decompressed. y/n always found him there, the only person he really wanted there. belly and jeremiah had come out there, but something about y/n’s hand in his made his heart balance.

as much as he wishes to forget all his thoughts, he was so happy with her all the time. she was like an eraser to the spelling mistakes and a bandaid on the cuts. she was more than just a girlfriend to him, she was a lifesaver.

y/n decided to just walk over to the fisher’s beach house. she hadn’t driven, knowing he’d probably want her to stay the night as well. despite the sun being out of the sky, the air was still warm and wrapped you in like a hug. you could smell the salt of the ocean and the damp grass in their yard. the sky was clear, just the high crescent of the moon reflecting on the water. something about it was therapeutic, reminder her of the boy waiting for her in the backyard.

she shuffled through a few patches a grass before carefully making her way down the dock to meet conrad. she greeted him as he had a joint in between his lips, lighting it up before releasing the smoke. “hey,” y/n says, sitting down next to him.

“you came,” he replies, almost sounding surprised.

“of course i did,” she grins. she takes the joint and places it between her own lips, inhaling and then blowing out a puff. the dock smelt like weed, but it was no secret that they’d been smoking. besides, susannah did it with laurel all the time. “you ok?”

“yeah, just wanted to see you,” he looks into her eyes and smiles. “i couldn’t sleep.”

“explains the pot we’re smoking. i couldn’t sleep either.” she hands it back to conrad. “even if i was sleeping, you know i’d come to you whenever.”

“i know. i’m always just eager to see you in person.”

“why?” she questions, teasingly. she knows the answer, but wants him to do it for himself. he leans in, pulling the joint back and landing a passionate kiss on her lips.

“because i can’t kiss you like that over the phone.”

she blushes like a middle schooler when her crush just looks at her once. like they haven’t been seeing each other since last summer and like she isn’t the only thing getting him out of bed in the morning. she looks deep into his red eyes, admiring every thought and feeling inside his beautiful head. “i’m always here for you, conrad. winter, spring, summer, and fall, i’ll be there.”

his lips curl into another thrilling smile, wrapping his arm around her as they pass the joint around a few times. they sit there for a while, glaring at the calm ripples in the water. it was just before midnight when they checked his phone again, seeing the bright numbers illuminate their faces. he gives y/n a mischievous look. “are you hungry?”

she directs another look of confusion to him, “what are you saying, fisher?”

the two stumble inside, stoned as they walk into the kitchen to take out a box of mac & cheese from the cabinet. they look over to jeremiah and steven, both slumped on the couch with their controllers on their stomach and the TV on a screensaver. “don’t wake them up, they’re gonna want some!” conrad attempts a whisper, but his small giggles pass through instead.

“shut the fuck up, we’re trying to be quiet,” y/n replies. as soon as she opens the drawer to get out a pot, a few of them clatter around and steven shuffles in his sleep. they both crouch down on the floor in hysterics until they hear the light snores from steven again.

“don’t worry about jeremiah, he’s slept on the bench at six flags once,” conrad says, peeking over to the two sleeping teens on the couch. they slowly fill the pot up with water and wait for it to boil. they don’t turn the timer on, just calculate the times on their phone as the water almost boils over to edge.

“shit, i told you to watch the water,” conrad says, turning the burner down.

“no, we both agreed i was gonna look at the phone.”

“it’s whatever, baby, just pour that cheese in here,” conrad requests after straining the flavorless pasta out of the water. they both pour each others bowls before running upstairs to conrad’s room. “we fucking did it!”

“finally, oh my god,” y/n speaks, sitting down on his bed as she places her bowl on his nightstand. “wanna watch shitty reality tv?”

“what type of question is that? of course, i want to,” he says sarcastically, throwing his hands up in the air before laying down on his bed and pulling y/n into him. her head was on his chest as his arm wrapped around her. they watched some old reruns of the kardashians before they were both eventually knocked out on his bed.

the sun had finally risen, and everyone else was up and ready for the day. they’d been eating their breakfast, and the kids were asking where conrad was.

“i’ll go check on connie, i’ll be right back,” susannah says, sweetly as she walks up the stairs she walks in to conrad and y/n on the bed, their bowls abandoned on the floor as her head is on chest, and his arms were around her. susannah laughs and debates whether or not to shake them awake, but she just nudges conrad a bit as he stretches and opens his eyes. “hey, we’re making breakfast if you want to join us?”

“oh, yeah. i’ll be down in a minute. she was tired, i might let her sleep for a little longer,” he says, looking at y/n.

“of course, she’s always welcome, connie,” susannah leaves the door open a crack and goes back downstairs. if y/n made conrad happy, then y/n made susannah happy.

[letsgetrowdy43]

Little White Lies—

Quinn Hughes x reader

Request: Quinn bringing his gf to the golf course to tag along with him, his brothers, and their dad. His gf pretended to be bad at gold for his sake…lol until they told her maybe she should go get an ice tea at the country club. But she decided to give them a run for the money…the Hughes Bros vs Quinn Gf and Jim. Jim even said he will invite her out to golfing with his friends… lol Jack even offered to bring her against Trevor. Quinn’s Gf def hustled them.

Off-season was coming to an end, meaning that the Hughes family golf tournament was in full swing.

Quinn had invited his girlfriend out with them for the first time. She wasn't invited out the past two summers that she'd accompanied Quinn to Michigan for the summer season, so she was excited and ready to play some golf.

Quinn grinned as she stood on the grass, her little white lulelemon skirt accentuated her thighs, her tanned shoulders on displayed, and hair was pulled back into a loose bun making his breath a little jagged and his head dizzy.

"Have you ever played before?" Jim asked as she stood next to him on the grass. Y/n took a practice swing, her form perfect as she held her pointer finger up to her lips, motioning for him to keep it a secret, "Ahh I see." "He gets competitive, I don't wanna burst his ego," she shrugged and sat next to the older man on his cart, sipping a Long Island Iced Tea as she watched Luke, Jack, and Quinn approach the cart.

Jack grinned, "Last game of the year, this decides who the best golf in the fam is," he mused, arm wrapping around his oldest brothers neck as his smirk grew, "as we all know I won last year, I'm feeling a two-year streak coming on." Quinn rolled his eyes and dipped out from Jack's hold making the younger brother trip from not having something to support his weight anymore.

"Don't listen to him, I have a feeling the title is all yours babe," the girl smiled innocently as Quinn melted into her hold, arms wrapped around him as she placed a kiss on his cheek. Quinn turned his head and pecked her on the lips, "You taste like rum," he whispered as he kissed her again. "Booze is the only way I'm getting through this day, and the heat," she said with a smile.

Jack groaned, "Stop being in love and lets get going!" "Okay okay," Quinn said, watching the pout on her face grow before he kissed it away, "lets go," he whispered.

Seven holes in and Y/n was putting in the least effort she could, not only was she not wanting to mess with the Hughes family tourney, but also golf was so disinteresting to her.

Quinn smiled at her as they arrived at the eighth hole, his hand on her thigh as she stared out of their cart to his brothers who were arguing in the other one, Jim driving with the most annoyed look on his face as his competitive sons bickered amongst themselves.

"Are you bored, love?" her loving boyfriend asked as they parked. "Am I doing that bad?" she asked, feigning innocence as she finally looked at him, brows pulled together with concern as he made a face that told her the answer, she was horrid. "Let me play this hole, and if I'm bad, I'll just go the bar and sit the rest out," she said with a grin. "I'm not saying you have to stop playing, you just look bored." "I know," she kissed his cheek before hopping off of the cart and pulling out her preferred club.

She let Luke go first, then Jack, and then it was her turn. Y/n turned and looked at Jim, winking at him before taking a deep breath and placing her feet in a better position, "I feel I might be getting better," she mused, Jim held back a chuckle as she swung her club and hit the ball.

The golf ball landed perfectly on the green as she turned around with a grin to look at all of the Hughes boys, a devious look on her face, many jaws dropped. "What?" she asked, dropping the bimbo act. "Your form was perfect!" "You just- have you been fucking around with us?"

The girl looked at Jim who looked thoroughly impressed, Quinn's brows were furrowed, "I thought you hated golf?" "I do," she shrugged, "doesn't mean I'm not good at it, Dad put me in lessons when I was in highschool," she said before taking a sip of her drink. "I feel betrayed!" "You'll live." "I don't think I will! I could've had you as a partner in the tourney against Brady and Matty instead of Jack!"

His girlfriend shrugged, "Speaking of tourneys, I'm gonna need you to partner with me tomorrow when I play against Cole and Trev," Jack said as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, hugging her into his side as she groaned. "I should've stayed at the bar," She looked to Quinn to get him to help her get out of it, but instead he shrugged with a smirk and looked down to his feet, ignoring eye contact. "Help your brother-in-law out!"

Quinn's face filled with amusement as she agreed returning to her boyfriend's side, "Are you mad?" "Of course not," he smiled as his arm wrapped around her, watching as Jim started to line up his club with the ball, "I'll try to get you out of that game tomorrow." "No I deserve the karma for lying," she said with a laugh, looking up at Quinn's crooked smile, her face broken out into a blushing mess as she stood on her tiptoes and pecked his lips lovingly, once, twice, and a third time before she was cut off. "Enough!" Jack screeched.

-

-

-

[puckinghischier]

Tattoos Together

Nico Hischier x fem!reader

summary: based off of the song tattoos together by lauv

notes: this idea was way better in my head, but i still think it’s cute and turned out alright. i’m obsessed with this song and knew i just had to write a nico fic based off of it asap. also, i know the timeline is all over the place bc nico is captain in this, and holtzy and dawson are here, but it technically takes place after jack’s rookie season. the beauty of fiction is that literally nothing is real, so let’s just all pretend everything is normal and chronologically correct 😊. hope you enjoy!! :)

[2.7k]

~

Summer was your favorite season for a number of reasons. First of all, you loved the warm weather. Being able to sit outside and soak up the sunshine was something your body desperately craved during the bitter New Jersey winter. You also loved the overall happiness of the general population that seemed to radiate during the summer months. Your favorite reason, however, was the fact that your best friend was always available to do whatever you wanted him to, because hockey isn’t played in the summer.

You hated that the Devils didn’t make the playoffs this year. You were as devastated as they were during that last game of the season, but you can’t lie and say you weren’t also ecstatic. You knew, the moment they lost the game that eliminated them from any sort of play off position, you were going to get a summer full of sun and fun at the lake house.

You had decided to take the warm season off from any internships or courses, not wanting anything to come in-between you and nearly four, uninterrupted months with your boys at the lake. You had decided to transfer to a college in Jersey so you could spend more time with Jack, not so you could stay in a strange city while all of your friends go to your favorite place on earth.

This year was especially exciting, considering Jack had convinced a group of his teammates to join in on the summer antics. Your anticipation for the warmer weather to arrive was only heightened once you learned a certain hockey captain would also be in attendance at the lake house.

You had been drawn to Nico from the first moment you met him after Jack’s rookie debut. Jack was so eager to introduce the two of you. He had made quick friends with the Swiss player after his arrival in the garden state and he wanted nothing more than his oldest and newest friend to meet one another and hit it off. Nico gave short, but kind, responses when Jack called you over to speak to him outside of the locker room; you assumed he was just tired and wanted to get home, but once you had seen him leaning against the wall in a crowded bar a few hours later, you made it your mission to make a friend out of the quiet hockey player.

You found yourself enjoying his conversation a little too much, basically neglecting Jack on his big night. The two of you talked about anything and everything. Nico had been in the middle of a story about his siblings back home when you suddenly realized the danger you were in. You hadn’t even been around this man for more than a few hours, and you could feel yourself falling for him. His kind eyes, the deep dimples when he smiled, and the care and attention he showed every single person that came up to congratulate him on the win, while also never failing to listen to your stories and stay engaged in the conversation with you, was making you spiral in the best way.

You knew you couldn’t go there, though. He was a big shot hockey captain, and you were only here for school. With the team’s busy schedule, you didn’t know when you would see him again. As soon as the light feeling in your chest had appeared, you forced it to make its exit. You couldn’t fall for him. You wouldn’t let yourself fall for him.

Over the next few months, however, you found yourself in Nico’s presence more often than not. Any team event that Jack dragged you to, you always found your way to where Nico was, striking up innocent, friendly conversation. If you were attending a home game at the Prudential Center, you were always cheering for Nico anytime he made a particularly important or skillful play. When he would come over to yours and Jack’s shared apartment, you always had some excuse for needing to be in the kitchen when they were, or passing through the living room and then planting yourself on the couch between the two ‘out of boredom’.

Nico wasn’t making it easy for you, either. Anytime the captain would score on the ice, it was you he was pointing towards during his celebration (or sending a text to ask if you were watching as soon as he was in the locker room for intermission, if it was an away game). If he had plans with Jack he would always send you a message, inviting you to tag along. Nico had even memorized your class schedule and your coffee order, bringing you your caffeine fix on lecture mornings when he would pick Jack up for morning skate. You found yourself talking to Nico almost more than you spoke to Jack, finding it harder and harder to keep your promise to yourself.

Jack could sense the underlying feelings you had for his captain, being able to pick up on all of your tells from the many years of friendship. He saw the way your gaze would immediately start sweeping any room you entered until it settled on Nico. He pretended not to notice the way you would always come out of your room on the mornings Nico was coming by before practice, hair and make-up already done, sitting in the kitchen to ‘work on homework’ before your lectures. He noticed when you bought his captain’s jersey, alternating between the 13 and 86 jerseys every other game. He noticed the way you would instantly perk up at the mention of Nico’s name in any conversation.

Jack also noticed the way Nico tried, and failed, to hide the feelings he had for you, as well. He noticed the way Nico would skate out for warm-ups and look around the glass until he saw you, waiting a few minutes before he made his way over to the glass where you were standing, pretending to be surprised when he turned around and found you behind him. Jack noticed the way Nico suddenly wanted to always come over to his apartment instead of Jack going to what the team refers to as the ‘captain’s quarters’. He noticed the way Nico would always come back with your favorite cocktail in hand anytime you were with them on a night out.

The back and forth between you and Nico continued for months, neither one of you ever taking the next step to admit feelings for one another. Jack wished the two of you would just get it over with at this point, the inevitable apparent to everyone but yourselves. So, when Jack opened the lake house invitation to Nico, Alex, and Dawson this summer, he can’t lie and say he didn’t have some ulterior motives.

Now, as you and Nico walked ahead of everyone else, lost in your own little world, he knew he made the right decision.

You had just eaten dinner, Jack having made reservations at a local seafood place he was dying to take everyone to, when you announced you wanted ice cream. You had suggested the small ice cream shop a short walk from the restaurant, wanting to stay out in the small lake town a little bit longer. You had sat next to Nico at dinner, staying in your own conversation most of the meal, being brought into the larger conversation happening around you only if either of your names were mentioned. The conversation followed the two of you outside, talking about his upcoming trip home.

“So, when are you leaving this utopia?” You asked him, shoulders bumping as you walked on the sidewalk beside him, a car driving by, causing your sundress to ruffle and flow in the passing wind.

“Not until the end of the month. Why? Can’t wait to get rid of me?” he responds with a playful smile, putting his hand on your back, pushing you over to the inside of the sidewalk, placing himself closest to the active road beside of you.

“Not even close,” you link your pinky with his, a habit you’ve gotten into anytime you’re walking beside him. “Dreading the day, actually. This is your first summer here, and you don’t even get to experience the best part!”

“I thought the best part was that you were here?” he references the statement you made when trying to convince him to make the trip to Michigan for the summer.

“Well, the next best part,” you respond, waving off his words. “You’re going to miss the boat parade on the Fourth of July!”

“A…boat parade?” Nico questions.

“Yes! A boat parade! Everyone decorates their boats and then drives them around the lake. Everyone here goes crazy for it. People don’t spare a single expense when it comes to boat decorations. One family even paid those statue street performers to play Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty on their boat on year,” you explain, earning a laugh from Nico.

“Why do I have the feeling you would have done that if you thought of it first?” he asks in-between chuckles.

“Because I would’ve! I was so mad that I didn’t even think of it. The only year we haven’t won it. Well, other than the years we haven’t been able to make it up here,” you shrug, thinking of all the time you’ve missed out on in the past few years.

“Well, you’ll have to come up with something even crazier this year. To make up for all the lost time,” Nico squeezes your pinkies closer together, knowing how much you hate the summers you can’t come here. “Look, you could go get a tattoo of the American flag, or something. Decorate your body, not just your boat. Really commemorate the summer,” he points to the tattoo shop you’re walking past, laughing at the craziness of the idea.

Maybe it was the heat finally getting to you. Maybe it was all the lake water you had swallowed the past few weeks. Or maybe it was the build-up of the months worth of feelings you’ve had for the man in front of you, but something in you made you say “Let’s go do it.”

“What?” Nico stopped in his tracks, looking over at you like you had three heads.

“I said let’s do it,” you said again, a serious look on your face.

“As in let’s go let you get a tattoo of the American Flag?” he asked again, confirming the idea forming in your brain.

“Yes. Well, I mean no. But yes,” you start, letting go of his pinky you were still holding on to. “I mean, let’s go get tattoos to commemorate the summer, like you said.”

“Like…right now?”

“Yes, right now. Why not? It’ll be fun. At the very least it’ll be a story to tell one day,” you try to convince him, acting as if this isn’t the most out of character thing you could suggest.

“I mean, what would we even get?” Nico asks, the word ‘no’ never coming out of his mouth.

“I don’t know, whatever you want. It doesn’t have to be anything big. Or anywhere where everyone will see it. It can just be something we know we have, y’know?” you continue to try to convince him.

“Hey! Why’d you two stop? The ice cream shop is another block down.” Jack asks as the rest of the group approaches the two of you.

“Y/N is trying to convince me to go get a tattoo with her right now,” Nico tells everyone, earning a collection of shocked faces.

“You two? Getting matching tattoos?” Dawson asks, looking between the two of you.

“They don’t have to be completely matching. Just something to make us thinks of this moment. This summer,” you explain. “We could all get one, actually. As a group!”

“You’re out of your mind if you think any of us are getting tattoos right now,” Jack speaks up, not scared to call you out on your stupid ideas.

“I don’t think it’s that crazy of an idea. It could be fun,” Nico surprises everyone.

“Cap, are you serious? You’re thinking about going and getting a tattoo right now?” Alex questions.

“I’ve been thinking about getting another one for awhile now, so why not right now? Like she said, it’s a good summer memory, Holtzy” Nico shrugs, sounding like he’s made up his mind.

“Of course you would agree to get a matching tattoo with her. You guys are practically attached at the hip anyways,” Dawson says, causing both you and Nico to flush a light shade of pink. “You guys go have your fun, get matching tattoos, but we’ll be eating ice cream, loving the taste of no regrets,” Dawson gives up the fight.

“Just…don’t get each other’s names on your foreheads,” Jack says, shaking his head as he walks away.

Dawson and Alex follow Jack, grumbling about how they can’t believe you’re actually going to do this. Alex slides in a “at least ask her on a date first, cap” as he walks away, Nico praying you didn’t hear the comment.

You turn towards Nico, holding your hand out. “You ready?”

He takes your hand, letting you pull him into the tattoo shop’s open door. “Let’s go get tattoos together.”

An hour later, you and Nico walked out with two fresh wounds on your ankles.

Both of your tattoos were so small you truly had to look for them to notice them. You had ended up getting tattoos that were technically matching, but could have meaning on their own, too. The artist had laid out a bunch of stencils she had ready to go, letting you pick from the pile which ones you wanted. You had found a small heart with devil horns, pointing it out to Nico and jokingly suggested he get it to show his Devils heritage. At almost the exact same time, his eyes landed on a small heart with a halo over it, his eyes lighting up.

He had agreed to get the devil one only if you got the matching angel one. So, twenty minutes later, the stencils were placed and you both sat on the table as two different artists tattooed you simultaneously.

The rest of your small group teased the two of you about it for the rest of the summer. After Nico left at the end of that month, the conversation shifted from teasing about the tattoos, to teasing about when the two of you were finally going to admit your feelings to each other. You waved off their words, sticking to your explanation of you two being just friends, but they didn’t let you forget that, in their words, you ‘basically branded’ their captain.

When Nico arrived home, Nina immediately clocked the small tattoo on her brother’s leg, questioning him about it. He told her it was just a last-minute decision, something to do after the season was over, not wanting to hear any nagging about how irresponsible it was that he let a girl he was even dating talk him into getting a matching tattoo. But, when Nina saw your Instagram post at the end of the summer, the very last picture showcasing a small, familiar looking angel tattoo, she barged into Nico’s bedroom, demanding answers.

“Nico, you better explain to me what the hell is going on here, because last time we spoke you hadn’t even told her you have feelings for her yet,” Nina interrogated Nico in their native language.

“Yeah…well that hasn’t really changed. Just…haven’t found the chance yet,” he avoids talking about the tattoo, choosing to talk about the other half of her question.

“Well after this, what the hell are you waiting for?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. What if she doesn’t feel the same way? What if she moves back home after she graduates next year and just leaves me behind?” Nico voices his fears to his older sister.

“Nico, she asked you to get matching tattoos. There’s no way she doesn’t feel the same way as you. I haven’t even fully met the girl, only having talked to her on your facetime calls, and I can see that she’s head over heels for you,” Nina encourages Nico, causing a warm feeling in his chest at his sister’s words.

“Well, when you put it that way…” Nico trails off, thinking about the events of this summer in full. “You know what, you’re right. As soon as I get home, I’m telling her. What’s the harm? And if she doesn’t have feelings for me, well, at least we’ll always have tattoos together.”

[sebscore]

Hello! Same anon from the charles x sister ask (not the dentist one). I love the recent fic! I cant think of anything specific that I would love to read, maybe just some cute sibling fluff between charles and reader, if not all the siblings? Thanks, you’re doing great!!

A SILVERSTONE WEEKEND | LECLERC BROTHERS

pairings: charles leclerc x sister!reader / lorenzo leclerc x sister!reader / arthur leclerc x sister!reader / pierre gasly x leclerc!reader / ollie bearman x leclerc!reader / isa hernáez x leclerc!reader

warnings: reader is a teenager. mention of flying. swearing.

author's note: thanks for the leclerc!sister resurrection on my blog! I hope you enjoy this fic and let me know what you think of it!

• • • • • • •

Silverstone was the first race of the new racing season the youngest Leclerc sibling attended. Her summer break had just started and a small trip to England seemed the right way to celebrate the end of the school year.

Since her brothers were already in England, she had to travel on her own as her mother had to stay in Monaco for work. It had been an anxious experience, but Lorenzo would pick her up at the airport and right away they would drive to the circuit to watch Arthur's sprint race and Charles' qualifying.

''Did they take care of you on the plane?'' The eldest brother hadn't been too keen on his little sister traveling alone without any kind of chaperone to accompany her.

Y/N nodded her head, handing her suitcase to her brother. ''Yeah, they were very nice to me,'' she eased his worries, ''but can you tell Charles that I'm fine with flying coach? I was the only person sitting in first class, it was embarrassing sitting there all alone.'' She was grateful her brother had gotten her a great seat on the plane, but she found all the luxuries a bit unnecessary.

Lorenzo laughed at words, imagining his sister sitting all alone while stewardesses attend to her every need. ''He wanted to be sure you had people there to help you in case you needed it,'' his hand moved to hold his sister's, ''by the way, at first he wanted to put you on a private plane, so be grateful you got to fly commercial.''

They made their way out of the airport and into his car, on their way to Silverstone. It would take them about an hour to get there, maybe with some extra traffic. ''How did Arthur's qualifying go yesterday? I didn't check it.'' She asked him, after sending their mother a message that she had arrived safely.

''P2, so today he starts P11 and tomorrow he's on the front row.'' Lorenzo answered her, explaining Arthur's starting positions. ''That's great.''

''Have you eaten anything?''

Y/N shook her head. ''No, I woke up too late and didn't have time to eat breakfast, and I didn't eat anything on the plane, because I was scared everything would, uh, come back up again.''

''You still get sick on planes? How many times have you flown now.'' Lorenzo chuckled, surprised his sister still got motion sickness while on planes.

She shrugged her shoulders. ''It's not like I have control over it, Enzo.''

''We'll eat at the track then, they have a lot of good stuff there.''

Eventually, they arrived at the circuit and walked to the Ferrari hospitality. It was Y/N's first time at the British Grand Prix, so she attentively observed the F1 paddock. The oldest and youngest sibling ran into an old family friend, Pierre Gasly. ''Enzo and Little Leclerc.'' He greeted them, hugging Lorenzo and giving Y/N a peck on the cheek.

''It's been a while since I last saw you, Y/N!'' Pierre said, not even being able to recall when he last saw the young girl. ''I know, it's good to see you.''

She was quite close with the Frenchman as their families were. They had been on vacations together and of course she would see him when she came to support Charles. Her brother and the Alpha Tauri driver even used to be in charge of babysitting her when she was still a toddler, although that didn't always go as planned.

''She finally has a break from school.'' Lorenzo explained to him, his arm going around her shoulder. Pierre nodded, forgetting sometimes that the girl still went to school.

He ruffled her hair. ''I have to go, but root for me, alright? I'm still your favorite driver, I hope?'' Pierre joked, referring to the time Y/N had teased Charles by saying that Pierre was her favorite Formula 1 driver.

''Yeah, of course,'' she jokingly rolled her eyes, ''bye, Pierre!'' They bid him goodbye and wished him luck in the qualifying later.

After a few more minutes of walking, they made it to the Ferrari hospitality where they could already see Arthur, Joris, Andrea and Charles waiting for them at one of the tables. As soon as the latter saw his younger sister, he stood up and embraced her in a hug. ''You're finally here.'' Charles sighed.

She smiled up at him and walked around the table greeting everyone else. ''I for sure thought you would step on the wrong plane and get lost.'' Arthur teased her, ruffling her hair like Pierre did earlier.

Y/N took the seat in-between Charles and Arthur, wanting to sit near her brothers as the new environment and people made her a bit uneasy. ''Yeah, you wish I got lost.''

Lorenzo offered to get himself and his sister some food, to which she protested saying that she should at least help him with it. ''No, no! You catch up with everyone, it's no big deal.'' She hesitated, but ultimately gave up and let him go alone.

''Maman send us your grades, they were really good!'' Charles spoke up, the picture of her school results popping into his mind. Y/N nodded, proud of herself for the great results. ''Thank you.''

''She send them to everyone in her contact book.'' Arthur commented, getting a laugh out of everyone. ''I even got a message saying how you had the best results in your class.'' Andrea added, the youngest Leclerc's grades had been the topic of the week.

Charles sat up straight, suddenly remembering something. ''Oh, yeah! We got you something, to congratulate you!'' He rummaged through his bag, pulling out a crumpled white envelope.

He handed it over to his sister, letting his arm hang around the back of her chair. ''It's from your lovely brothers.'' The grins on Arthur and Charles' faces gave her some trust issues about this ''gift''.

''If it's another signed picture of Arthur, I don't want it.'' She pretended to hand the envelope over again. The brothers laughed but shook their heads, that joke had become outdated after the countless times the youngest brother had pulled it. ''It's not that! It's actually something serious this time.'' Arthur assured her, coming across as genuine.

Y/N hesitantly opened the envelope, revealing multiple gift cards for several luxury fashion brands like Chanel, Dior and Versace. She observed the cards with wide eyes, in disbelief her brothers would actually get her a useful gift.

''Oh, thank you so much!'' Her arms first went around Charles, giving him a kiss on the cheek and afterwards doing the same with Arthur.

Bright smiles appeared on the brother's faces, delighted that their baby sister liked their gift. ''You can go shopping with Maman or Charlotte when you're back home.'' Charles suggested. ''Or Carla?'' Arthur added, including his girlfriend.

Lorenzo made it back to their table, holding a plate of pasta for the young girl. ''Oh, you already got your gift! You like it, Chérie?'' It had been a last-minute kind of situation to get her the cards, having to wait whether her grades were good or not.

''Yeah, thank you so much, Enzo!'' Just like before with Charles and Arthur, she gave her oldest brother a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

''Eat up now!''

''Arthur Leclerc crossed the line to take the win!''

Y/N proudly watched her brother take the checkered flag, already making her way to the barricades with her siblings to congratulate him on the victory. Much to her surprise, the first person Arthur ran up to was his sister instead of his engineer or other two brothers.

Normally she would push his sweaty form away, but this time she reciprocated the firm grip he had on her. ''You looked so cool, Thur! It was awesome!'' She practically yelled, not sure how much he could actually hear of it.

Arthur was semi-relieved he had his helmet on, knowing his sister would have teased him for a long time if she had seen the big smile that appeared on his face. He felt a hint of pride in himself as it was the first time Arthur was called ''cool'' by his younger sibling, at least the first time he had heard the words come out of her own mouth.

''Can we get a picture with the four Leclercs?'' One of the photographers asked them, holding his camera up. The three brothers glanced at their sister, knowing she isn't used to getting her picture taken like the rest of them. Y/N slowly nods her head, putting her arm around Charles' waist.

Arthur took a step back, taking off his helmet and balaclava for the photo. ''Do I look fine?'' He asked no one in particular.

''No, but it will do.'' She teased him, resulting in a slap on the arm from him.

The Formula 3 champion of the day wiped some sweat from his face before reaching his arm over his sister's shoulder. The four of them smile for the camera and wait until the photographer gives them a thumbs up.

''Arthur, you stink.'' Y/N tried to take a step away from him, but he pulled her back into him and rubbed his sweaty face all over the top of her hair. ''Ew! Get away from me!'' She pushed him off of her, her disgusted expression amusing her brothers very much.

''Leclerc, get on the podium!''

Y/N couldn't help but take out her phone and film as her brother took the top step, proudly lifting his trophy in the air and spraying the champagne around. She sent the video to their mom, who couldn't have been more delighted for her son's first F3 win of the season.

''Oh, this bitch.'' Y/N mumbled to herself as Arthur was nowhere in sight.

Not too long after his podium ceremony, she had to use the bathroom. Arthur had suggested she used the one at the Prema hospitality as it was the closest one to them. Charles had to go get ready for his own race and Lorenzo joined him, telling the two youngest to meet them at his Ferrari garage.

Arthur said he would wait for her outside the bathroom and that they would go together, since the youngest Leclerc was unfamiliar with the space and their mother would kill the three brothers if they lost her. Yet, no Arthur in sight.

Y/N stood frozen in her place, not wanting to snoop around looking for her brother and potentially walk into the wrong room.

''You okay there?'' A thick British accent interrupted her internal panic, slightly flinching at the sudden appearance of someone.

She turned around and was met with a guy she guessed was around her age, and towered a bit over her. He looked familiar, she just couldn't seem to place him. ''Uh, yeah, uh, my brother- he was supposed to wait for me here and now he's gone…'' She managed to stutter out, feeling nervous under the young man's gaze.

''Arthur was called down by one of the team members to discuss the race, that can take while actually.'' He explained his absence, pointing at one of the rooms where Arthur seemed to be.

Y/N nodded, understanding. ''Ah, wait- you know my brother?'' She frowned, she didn't even tell him it was Arthur she was looking for.

The guy nervously chuckled, realizing she had no idea who he was. ''Yeah, we're teammates! I'm Ollie, Ollie Bearman.''

''Oh my god, of course! You were on the podium as well, congrats.'' Maybe she should start to pay more attention to the jobs of her brothers. ''Sorry, it's the first time I've been to a Grand Prix this year.'' She apologized.

''It's okay, really,'' Ollie brushed it off, ''you need to get somewhere or?''

She nodded her head. ''My brother is racing and I need to get to the Ferrari garage, but I have no idea how I'm supposed to get there.''

''Well if you want I can get you to the F1 paddock? I don't have a special pass, so I can't show you where the garage is, unfortunately.'' He suggested, a soft smile settled on his face.

His offer to help her brought a red blush to her cheeks. ''That would be really sweet, thank you so much.''

''Don't worry about it.'' The walk to the entrance of the F1 paddock hadn't been too long, but long enough so the young pair could get to know each other more.

In the beginning it was a little hard to get the conversation going as this was the first time the two ever met, but soon enough Ollie was sharing stories about his young karting days and his little sister's show jumping. ''My mum didn't want her to do karting.''

Y/N chuckled. ''Mine was the same! My dad always tried to persuade her, but it never worked.'' Pascale had seen the bruises her son's would come home with, there was no way she would let her daughter have the same.

''You've never karted then?''

''I've done it a few times with my brothers, but they always make it into a competition and it's not fun that way.'' She explained, recalling the few times she did go karting and ended up almost being pushed off the track by Charles and Arthur.

''I get that- oh, here we are.'' They had arrived at the entrance, both of them a bit disappointed that they had to part ways already. ''I don't think it should be too hard to find out where the garage is once you're inside.'' He assured her.

''Thanks, Ollie,'' she smiled at him, ''I really appreciate it.''

His face mirrored hers. ''No problem, uh, I'll see you around then?'' He hoped to see more of the Leclerc girl, she was very charming and unlike Arthur had claimed to him and Jak, she seemed greatly intelligent.

''Yes, I'll see you, bye!'' Y/N offered a small wave and turned around to make her way into the paddock, hoping that one way or another she would find her brother's garage.

Ollie's assurance that it wouldn't be too hard to find was the biggest lie she had heard all day. She already doesn't have the best sense of orientation and the large amount of people roaming the paddock, weren't making it any easier.

An idea popped into her head, one that she should have come up with from the beginning.

Phoning up her brothers.

Charles wasn't going to pick up, that was a given. So then she tried Lorenzo whose phone must have either died or put on silent since it didn't even go through. The last option was Arthur and like she thought, that man was never going to answer one of her calls ever. At least they couldn't say that she didn't try.

But someone must have listened to her prayers. ''Y/N?'' A voice next to her pulled her out of her thoughts, a hand laid on her shoulder. ''You okay?''

Y/N glimpsed to her side and saw Isa, Carlos' girlfriend, looking at her with concern in her eyes. ''Oh, I- I can't find my brothers.''

Isa's concerned expression changed to a relieved one, glad nothing too bad had happened to the young girl. ''I know where they are, come on.'' The older woman held out her hand, which Y/N immediately took.

''I haven't seen you since last year! How have you been?'' Her and Isa had met on a few other occasions ever since Carlos became Charles' teammate. She was very fond of her and the Spanish woman always complimented the girl.

''School just ended, so I'm doing really well.'' She nervously grinned, flustered about holding hands with her.

Isa laughed at her words. ''Oh, yeah! Charlotte said something about it, smartest girl of the class?'' She teased, quoting the words her friend had told her.

Turns out that the Ferrari garages hadn't been too far and she had been going the entirely wrong way as she and Isa were already making their way through the halls that would lead to Charles'.

''There you are!'' Lorenzo exclaimed upon noticing his sister walking in with Isa, running up to her and taking her into his arms. ''Thank you so much!'' He told Isa, who brushed it off and bid them goodbye to go support her boyfriend.

A guilty-looking Arthur appeared from behind Lorenzo. ''I'm so sorry! I wasn't away for that long, but when I got back you were already gone.'' He apologized, genuine regret audible in his voice.

''It's fine, Ollie helped me and I ran into Isa as well.'' She wasn't too mad about it, this was one of those things that she could blackmail him with for a long time.

''Ollie? My teammate? He helped you?'' The puzzled expression on Arthur's face caused a chuckle to escape.

Y/N nodded. ''Yeah, he brought me to the paddock! Very nice guy.'' The shy smile that played on her lips wasn't amusing to the youngest Leclerc brother.

''You made sure to thank him, right?'' Lorenzo didn't seem to mind that a young man her age had spent time with her, he was just relieved she had somehow found her way to them. ''Of course, Enzo.''

''What did you even talk about with him?'' Arthur continued asking, confused as to why his teammate wanted to help his sister in the first place.

His sister gave him a glare. ''One more question and I'm telling Maman you left me all alone, alright?'' The protective older brother act didn't suit Arthur at all.

''Let's focus on Charles now, okay? You two have had your moment to shine.'' Lorenzo interrupted.

''Hey! I could have been kidnapped or something!''

''Too bad you weren't- Auw! Enzo, she hit my arm!''

''You deserved it, Arthur.''

[signoferoda]

WATER BUG - HS

Summary- The styles family have a fun day at the beach where Novie learns how to catch the waves

The sun rose high in the sky, painting the sandy shores of the beach with hues of gold and orange. Novie, at three years old, bounced with excitement, her chubby cheeks flushed with anticipation as she clung to Harry's hand.

"Are we going to the beach, Daddy?" Novie asked, her eyes wide with excitement, she was unable to contain her happiness, jumping up and down, tugging on her father’s hand repeatedly.

Harry chuckled, ruffling her hair affectionately. "That's right, lovie! We're going to have a fun day at the beach!"

With a cooler packed full of snacks, beach toys, and sunscreen in tow, the Styles family made their way down to the shore. They were on their summer break from school so had escaped to Italy for their annual holiday, The salty breeze teased at their hair as they walked, and the sound of crashing waves filled the air with a sense of excitement.

As they reached the water's edge, Novie's eyes widened with wonder at the sight before her. The vast expanse of sand seemed to stretch on forever, meeting the sparkling sea in a perfect line on the horizon. "Wow!" she exclaimed, her tiny voice filled with awe. She was older now, having more understanding of the beach since her last visit.

Theo and Blake, the older brothers, were determined to make Novie's first proper beach day unforgettable. With boogie boards and surfboards in hand, they led Novie down to the water, their laughter mingling with the sound of crashing waves.

"Come on, Novie! Let's catch some waves!" Blake called out, his grin infectious as he waded into the surf. He was 13 years old and definitely the most crazy kid out of the four.

Theo nodded in agreement, his eyes sparkling with excitement. "Yeah, you'll love it!" he added, his voice brimming with enthusiasm. As the oldest at 15, he knew he had a big responsibility of making sure his baby sister was safe but also having the most fun.

However Y/N and Indi, known for their tendency to worry, couldn't shake off their concerns about potential dangers lurking beneath the water's surface. They stayed close, keeping a watchful eye on Novie as she wandered along the shore, her small feet sinking into the sandy ground.

"Be careful, lovebug," Y/N called out, her voice tinged with concern. "Watch out for any jellyfish!"

Indi nodded in agreement, his brow furrowed with worry. "And don't swallow too much saltwater, okay? Dad says It's not good for you."

But Novie was too caught up in the excitement of the moment to pay much attention to their warnings. With Theo and Blake by her side, her two protectors, she felt invincible, her laughter ringing out like music in the air as they splashed and played in the waves.

Theo and Blake couldn't contain their excitement as they rode the waves with Novie, their laughter echoing along the shoreline. Novie squealed with delight each time a wave lifted her boogie board, her tiny hands gripping onto the sides as she rode the surf alongside her brothers.

Y/N watched nervously from the shore, her heart fluttering with every splash and wave. "Be careful, Novie! Theo, make sure she doesn’t go too far out” she called out, her voice filled with motherly concern.

Indi, standing beside her, nodded in agreement. "Yeah, be careful please" he added, his eyes scanning the horizon for any sign of danger.

But Novie was totally in her element, her laughter ringing out like music in the air as she splashed and played with her brothers. With each wave that crashed against the shore, her confidence grew, and soon she was riding the waves like a pro, well as pro as a three year old could be.

While Theo, Blake, and Novie were caught up in the excitement of surfing, Indi found himself drawn to a different aspect of beach life. He stayed close to his parents, content to explore the shoreline at his own pace. Y/n encouraged him to collect seashells and driftwood, marveling at the intricate patterns and shapes they discovered along the shore.

"Look at this one, Mum!" Indi exclaimed, holding up a particularly beautiful conch shell for her inspection. "Isn't it so cool?"

Y/N smiled, her eyes sparkling with pride at her son's curiosity. "It's beautiful, Indi," she replied, her voice filled with warmth.

Harry, sensing Indi's interest, knelt down beside him, his gaze following the line of the horizon as he listened to the rhythmic sound of the waves. "Did you know that each shell has its own story to tell?" he asked, his voice soft and contemplative.

Indi shook his head, his eyes widening with curiosity. "Really? What kind of stories?"

Harry grinned, his eyes crinkling at the corners with fondness. "There are so many stories," he said, his voice filled with excitement. "Some shells have traveled long distances across the ocean, while others have been home to tiny creatures for years."

Indi listened intently as Harry shared stories of the sea, his imagination soaring as he imagined the adventures behind each shell.

As the afternoon wore on, the sun beat down relentlessly overhead, casting a warm glow over the beach. Harry watched with pride as Novie rode the waves, her smile lighting up the entire shoreline and as his youngest son collected different shells for each of his siblings.

But as the sun reached its peak, Harry noticed that Novie's cheeks were starting to flush with heat, and her movements were becoming sluggish. Concern gnawed at his heart as he approached her in the water.

"Hey there, little surfer," Harry said, his voice gentle as he lifted Novie out of the water and onto the shore. "I think it's time for a little break, don't you?"

Novie nodded sleepily, her eyelids drooping with exhaustion as she nestled into Harry's arms. "Nap time," she murmured, her voice soft and sleepy. She normally had naps earlier on in the day, but y/n let her play, they were on holiday after all.

With Novie cradled in his arms, Harry made his way back to where the rest of the family had set up camp beneath the shade of an umbrella. Y/N rushed forward to meet them, her eyes filled with concern.

"Is she okay?" Y/N asked, her voice tinged with worry as she brushed a gentle hand against Novie's forehead.

Harry nodded, his expression reassuring. "She's just a little tired and overheated," he explained. "Think a nap in the shade will do her good."

Y/N breathed a sigh of relief, feeling the tension melt away from her shoulders. "Thank goodness," she whispered, leaning in to plant a gentle kiss on Novie's forehead.

Indi, sensing his mother's relief, let out a sighs of his own. "I'm glad she's okay," Indi said, his voice soft with relief.

Theo nodded in agreement, his eyes filled with brotherly concern. They had followed their dad up to the shade. "Yeah, me too. We'll have to be more careful next time," he added, shooting a meaningful glance at Blake.

Blake's smile faltered, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "My bad, guys. I guess I got a bit too excited," he admitted, a touch of remorse in his voice.

But Harry shook his head, a smile playing at the corners of his lips. "No harm done," he said, his voice warm with affection. "We're just glad Novie's okay. You have to remember that she’s just a baby bud, she gets tired quicker." Harry spoke, earning a nod from his son.

Harry tucked Novie into a cozy beach towel under the shade of the umbrella, and took a seat with her, gently rocking her to sleep. Y/N nestled close, her arm around Novie, and Indi, Blake and Theo joined them, taking some drinks out the cooler, winding down from a long day.

"I still can't believe she rode those waves," Blake said, his voice filled with admiration as he glanced at Novie sleeping peacefully. "She's fearless."

Theo nodded in agreement, his gaze fixed on his little sister with a mixture of pride and protectiveness. "Yeah, she's something else," he said, a hint of awe in his voice.

“She’s our water bug” Indi smiled, moving to grab Novies small hand in his own. The image making Harry and y/n audibly awe and flash a quick picture of them.

Eventually, as the sun dipped below the horizon and the sky turned shades of pink and purple, Harry felt Novie stir in his arms. She blinked sleepily, rubbing her eyes with tiny fists before snuggling closer to her dad.

"Hey there, sleepyhead," Harry whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Did you have a good nap?"

Novie nodded, her eyes still heavy with sleep. "Mm-hmm," she murmured, a sleepy smile tugging at her lips.

Y/N leaned in, brushing a strand of hair away from Novie's face. "You did so well today, lovie," she said, her voice soft with love. "We're so proud of you."

Novie beamed, her eyes shining with happiness as she snuggled closer to her family. It was the best beach day.

[ovaova]

After a tiring day of hero work, all Katsuki wanted to do was take off his work uniform, take a shower, eat the delicious dinner he knows you’ve prepared for him, spend a little time with his kids, and hit the hay.

And if he was lucky, maybe you’ll let him get close to you too

He set his house/car keys in the bowl on the nearby table before making his way past the kitchen into the living room.

There he saw both his middle and youngest daughters watching tv. Of course he kisses them hello, one cheek each. It wasn’t till he noticed his oldest son missing

“Where’s your brother?”

“He’s in his room”

“Yeah but he’s been in his room for hours, it’s weird.”

Hours? That is pretty weird, but not the type of weird Katsuki felt like dealing with tonight.

“Okay, well don’t you two stay staring at that tv for hours, huh?”

Both girls peeked up before instantly trying to find something else to do

‘We really need to cut their screen time..’

Finally, Katsuki had made it to your shared bedroom. He could finally be at ease.

“Hey baby, I’m home. It smells good downstairs, what are you making?” Katsuki said kissed your forehead

“Just curry…Y’know, the usual..” You answered, not looking up from the book you’ve been reading.

Katsuki furrowed his eyebrows at your tone. Usually he wouldn’t dwell but he can’t do that when it comes to you and he knows somethings not right.

“Is everything okay? You alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine…you can take your shower, I’m done”

“Mm, okay-“

“Actually Katsuki-“

‘Finally, let it out’ he thought turning back to face you

I wanted to ask you about this..”

Katsuki eyes went wide as saucers as he saw what you were holding.

A pack of condoms, some missing signaling that they have been used.

“What..the hell..is…that..?”

“Hm, I don’t know Katsuki. All I know is that we have three kids, I’m on the pill, AND WE HAVENT USED A GODDMAN CONDOM IN FOUR FUCKING YEARS. SO I DON’T KNOW WHAT THE HELL IT IS KATSUKI, YOU TELL ME-“

“B-bABY I DONT KNOW? Where did you even find those???”

“DOES IT FUCKING MATTER WHERE I FOUND THEM??”

.

.

.

“God WHERE ARE THEY? I KNOW I just had them!? I swear this will be the last time I ever hold anything for Haruki”

For the past few hours, (sons name) has been searching for a missing…package that he was supposed to be holding for his friend who was at a summer camp

“Please man I can’t leave them at home! My mom will find them!”

“Please I won’t ask for anything ever again,”

Excuse after excuse after excuse, but of course (sons name) was gonna be a good friend…but if being a good friend leads him to loosing a pack of open condoms in his own house with his two sisters mom and dad, then he might want to change his juxtaposition.

It wasn’t until (son’s name) heard muffles arguing coming from his closed bedroom door.

There could only be one explanation…

“Oh…my…fuck.”

.

.

.

“ (Y/N) I PROMISE THOSE ARENT MINE, WHY WOULD I EVEN HAVE CONDOMS IN THE FIRST DANN PLACE??”

“WELL I DONT KNOW HOW ABOUT YOU TELL ME? THEY WERE IN OUR ROOM, UNDER OUR BED, ON YOUR SIDE.”

The couple continued arguing before heavy footsteps could be heard coming to their door, soon to reveal their son busting in.

“WAIT!”

Both parents glanced to their son who was out a breath trying to get out his statement.

“I-It’s mine!”

.

.

.

“WHAT?” Both parents shouted in disbelief At the same time.

“I CAN EXPLAIN! I CAN EXPLAIN! THEY’RE NOT MINE, THEY’RE A FRIENDS. HE ASKED ME IF I COULD HOLD THEM FOR HIM WHILE HE’S OUT OF TOWN…”

It went silent… no one knowing what to actually say.

Guess relaxing after work was gonna be out of the question for a while…

[weasleyreidstyles]

Serendipity; snippets of navigating fifth year with Fred Weasley

series masterlist

based on a request from ages ago. its a little choppy, but bare with me, ive just suffered the worst bout of writer's block ever😓 (i'm actually so sad that i've neglected serendipity so much but im back and i have so many wips to share with you all!!!!)

pairing(s): fred weasley x fem!reader, brief theodore nott x fem!reader (platonic)

Hogwarts doesn't feel the same anymore. The usual air of magic had been snuffed out with each imposing rule that was nailed to the Entrance Hall walls. There is no more laughter in the corridors, no more soft chatter from the figures inside the magical portraits; instead the repetitive notes of Professor Umbridge's sugary sweet tone rattle over deafening speakers.

All boys and girls must remain eight inches apart from eachother.

There will be no house fraternising during meal times.

Talk of any unauthorised groups will be met with adequate punishment.

Curfew must be met by every member of the student body.

That last one still haunts you in your peaceful moments.

It's the reason you sit on one of the uncomfortable plush seats in Professor Umbridge's office, a cursed black quill clenched in your harsh grip as you write out those very words, the familiar cursive of your own handwriting etching painfully into the skin of your non-dominant hand. She was smirking at you under the guise of sipping lengthily from her pink teacup, watching as the tears steadily building in your eyes finally spilled down over your cheeks, which were flushed red from the pain.

How had you found yourself in this predicament exactly?

You were made a prefect at the start of the year, alongside Hermione and Ron, which you'd found out when you got your letter detailing which books you would need for your fifth year. You remember the pride written across your parents' faces and how elated you had been to be given such a prestigious role, one that many Ravenclaw students in your year wanted just as badly as you. It was a revered spot after all. Everyone was elated for you, but none more so than the oldest Weasley twin.

"Are you going to give us unlimited leeway with pranks now that you hold such a position of authority, gorgeous?" Fred's husky voice joked in a whisper as the two of you sat at the dining table during the small party that Molly and your mother had set up in celebration for the three of you.

"Are you asking me to take advantage of my new position, Weasley?" You ask, a small smirk making its way on your face as you fight the blush threatening to paint your cheeks at his sudden closeness.

All summer, he had been flirting with you. At first you put it down to his lack of contact to the outside world and you laughed at his well-timed jokes and played into his flirtations with rebutting jokes of your own.

But then one night, when you flirted back daringly, he kissed you. He actually kissed you. It wasn't your first kiss. No, that went to Harry in a random game of truth or dare back in second year (something you both agreed was wrong on so many levels; it was never discussed by any of you again). But this kiss with Fred felt incredible and it cemented a closer bond with the older twin, whose brilliantly blue eyes sparkled with something more whenever he stared at you after that moment.

He'd rewarded your achievement later that same evening, after the party, behind the closed door of your temporary bedroom, leaving you smiling and giddy for the rest of summer. It's what prompted Ginny and Hermione's loose bet as to how long it would take for the pair of you to get together officially.

Your elation lasted until the very moment you stepped into the Prefects' Carriage and found out who you'd be partnered up with for the year.

Theodore Nott. Notorious for his aloof attitude as well as his surprising intellect that rivalled Hermione's. He was part of Riddle's group, one of the most popular groups in school, possibly trumping even the Golden Trio. But because he was part of Riddle's crew you had learned to hate him just a little – his teasing remarks towards your friends, especially Ron, always sent you into a spiral of brewing animosity.

So when Alicia Spinnet, who had been given the prestigious role of Head Girl, announced that she was pairing you with him, you cast her a look of utter betrayal, which she vehemently ignored.

You did not speak to Nott for the entire time you were meant to familiarise yourselves with eachother, and he made no effort either; grey eyes misted over as if he wasn't even part of the present conversation altogether. Gods how you despised him.

~∞~

Upon returning to your original compartment, following slowly behind Ron and Hermione, Fred had immediately seen your crestfallen look.

"What's up, gorgeous?" he asked from his seat by the window, ignoring Ron's faux gagging at the nickname. He'd also moved further into the corner to allow you the space to sit down.

You thanked him with a quiet smile before sitting down with a sigh.

"Alicia paired me with Nott for prefect rounds. How unfortunate is that?" You mumble, resting your head dejectedly against his burly shoulder.

"You're joking?!" He says with wide eyes. "What the hell was she thinking?"

"I assume it was because Davies paired Parkinson with your counterpart, so you got paired with Nott as a consequence." Hermione said from the opposite seat. "The Ravenclaws and Slytherins in sixth and seventh year were paired together as well."

Yes that was an overarching trend that had seemed to stick over the years.

"Maybe it won't be too bad." Ginny says and you all turn to her in synchronised disbelief. "What? I've never seen Nott speak. Maybe that'll be a good thing. A mute partner is better than a snarky one."

"Just the thought of being in his presence makes me uncomfortable. Mute or not." You say quietly, so only Fred can hear.

"If he does or says anything to you, let me know yeah?" He replied with equal secrecy and you nod your head imperceptibly in response.

He lets you use his shoulder as a makeshift pillow when you find your eyes closing drowsily, brushing the loose hair that falls into your face and ignoring George's knowing glances.

~∞~

The very first round of Prefect duties was utterly boring and painfully long. You and Nott had patrolled the Astronomy corridor with lacklustre precision, both eager to get away from eachother's presence.

It was like this for a while, a few months to be exact, until you both became accustomed to the silence, to the point where it was actually bareable. No longer were rounds a labourous activity; you and Nott began to partake in small talk, to the most minute extent – in no way did this make you aquainted and in the daylight, you returned to steely looks and barely contained snarls of discontent, which was mirrored by your friends, and his. You barely noticed the extra attention that Voldemort's son seemed to be giving you as your friendship with Theo progressed at a steadily growing pace.

At your budding friendship with the Slytherin Prefect, Fred began showing up at the end of your rounds to whisk you away, never sparing Theo a glance. The two of you would wander the desolate corridors, hands interlocked as you spoke quietly and unhurriedly. You noticed that Fred, always grinning and never unnecessarily angry, would grow agitated in Theo's presence and you never understood why.

Until one night, when Fred was loitering at the end of your last corridor to patrol, Theo had said something that made you burst into pearls of laughter; his face had lit up with a delighted smirk at the sound.

Fred's face was stoic and so unnaturally like his usual cadence that it took you completely by surprise.

"Of course you're waiting here, Weasley." Theo had mumbled, mostly to himself, but Fred had bristled from where he was leaning against the wall.

"You have a problem with that, Nott?" He had snarled and you'd looked at him with widened eyes at the edge in his voice.

Eager to defuse the tension, you took Fred's hand and gave Theo a look that read 'stop being an arsehole', before leading the ginger boy away.

Theo had gone back to his best friend to report that Mattheo's suspicions were indeed correct: you had been learning Legillimancy and had unknowingly spoken to Theo without so much as moving your lips.

And Fred had no idea.

~∞~

This routine continued for you and Fred, leaving you at the butt end of George and Lee's teasing. You came to expect him to be waiting at the end of your rounds, where you would part ways with Theo before spending at least an hour in Fred's presence.

On some occasions when it was far too cold to continue wandering the hallways at night, he would tell you to go straight to the Gryffindor common room, where there would be a fire in the hearth and plenty of blankets to snuggle into.

On such occasions, Theo offered to walk you there, despite him not wanting to be anywhere near the lions' den. It was during these times where your friendship with him became cemented as pure and real. Your friends were surprised when you actively sought eachother out during lessons.

Fred hated your budding friendship, but he said nothing about it; it wasn't his place to undermine your friendships.

But it became hard to hold his tongue when Professor Umbridge unveiled her new Inquisitorial Squad, which Theo and his friends had joined in quick succession.

The Inquisitorial Squad was a massive hindrance for Dumbledore's Army. The lot of you had to be more vigilant with your timings for the meet ups in the Room of Requirement, lest you get caught out by these glorified prefects. The Inquisitorial Squad is how you ended up in her office in the first place.

You had been patrolling with Theo, who was complaining about how frustrating having magicless lessons was becoming in the lead up to ypur OWL exams (you'd felt guilty about the DA not including any Slytherins all year, and this further cemented that feeling), when Adrian Pucey and Professor Umbridge came waltzing around the corner.

"Good evening Master Nott." the Professor says warmly, before her gaze sweeps over to you and her beady eyes catch onto the flashy Prefect badge pinned proudly tp your chest.

"Miss Meadow, why are you out past curfew?" She asks with faux concern, mouth twisting with a sadistic smirk.

"Uh-" You look at Theo, who looks just as startled as you. "We're just about to finish our rounds, Professor."

Umbridge lets out a heinous giggle that grates on your nerve.

"Oh my dear, didn't you see the newest decree?" She asks, her face alight with victory when you shake your head. "I have no need for Prefects anymore. I disproved them as a group."

"Wha- Why?" you ask, disbelief painted across your face. Pucey smirks as he looks from you to Theo.

"The Inquisitorial Squad has overtaken that job, Meadow." He spits your name like its dirt on the bottom of his shoe. You share a look of alarm with Theo.

I knew nothing of this Meadow, I promise you.

He looks sincere and you believe him, word for word.

"This sheer display of disobedience cannot go unpunished." Her harsh giggle is the only sound that fills the corridor.

She hands you a detention on a silver platter and you go into it blind. You didn't know that Harry had been trying to protect you, Ron and Hermione from the same fate as him.

~∞~

She dismissed you with a delighted giggle after an hour of writing the same line over and over again.

Curfew must be met by every member of the student body.

Your hand is throbbing from the pain, but all you feel is numb. You wander the hallways like a ghost, not bothering to pay mind to where you're walking, until you find yourself at the portrait of the Fat Lady leading to the Gryffindor common room.

"Password?!" Elizabeth says impatiently, as if she'd been repeating herself over and over.

"Gillyweed." You mumble and she finally takes in your appearance, completely forgetting to open the portrait hole.

"Oh my dear, are you alright?" She says, voice full of concern, and if she were able to, you're sure she'd reach a hand out and place it delicately onto your shoulder.

"'M fine, Elizabeth. Just need to sit down." You didn't realise how tired you were, but from the slurring of your words and the speed with which the portrait swings open, with no hesitation towards the blue and bronze tie donning your neck, you must be on the verge of collapsing.

Fred sees you first.

"Meadow? What are you doing here, gorgeous?" he asks, voice filled with concern.

"Don't know. But 'M really sleepy." You say and you grip at his arms with barely any strength, which he notes with wide, panicking eyes.

"Shit- okay, come on let's go upstairs."

He guides you slowly towards his dorm, ignoring his brothers and Hermione and Harry's looks of worry. He sees the blood dripping from your hand in the dim light of the room, which prompts him to usher you much faster.

He sits you on the marble of the ensuit bathroom, the cold of the tiles barely registers to you.

He's mumbling a series of healing charms against your hand, jaw clenching when the blood flow slows enough for him to see the culprit of your bloodlust.

"Did she do this to you?" He asks, his voice as low as a growl that has your thigh clenching at the tone.

"Technically," You start with a weak laugh, "I did this to myself. She told me what to write."

"It's not funny, gorgeous." He says with a frown that you manage to wipe away with a peck of your lips.

"It's fine, Freddie."

"No. It's not."

You can practically see the plans forming in his brain and the next day, a series of crazed birds are let loose in the Great Hall, all headed straight for the newly appointed Head Mistress, Fred's smirking face meeting her's with no hesitation.

His hand sports similar wounds to you by the end of the day and you patch him up in the same fashion that he did for you.

~∞~

You don't show up to your scheduled Prefect meetings for the rest of the year, and you avoid Theo in the corridors, much to your friends' delight.

His voice in your mind is the only point of contact that you have with your Italian friend, something you keep hidden from your friends, especially Fred.

You look sad, tesoro. He says from across the Great Hall, days after your first detention with Umbridge. You sit facing the Slytherin table beside Luna Lovegood, who looks between you, Fred and Theo imperceptibly.

I'm not sad. I'm bored.

Yes because I'm sure the Gryffindor table is just a delight to be seated at.

You scoff outwardly at his sarcasm.

"What're you scoffing about, gorgeous?" Fred's voice says from behind you. You sneak a look towards Theo, who seems to have engaged himself in a conversation with Riddle and Berkshire, not showing that he was just immersed in conversation with you mere seconds ago.

"Just thinking about all the ways I want to make Umbridge suffer." You say with an offhanded shrug. Luna giggles into the palm of her hand.

"I have plenty of ideas." He says with a smirk as he drags you from your seat and into the corridors beyond the Great Hall.

Professor Umbridge may have cast a cloud of sorrow over the magic of Hogwarts, but nothing could take away the fun you'd been having in the stolen moments with your best friend's brother.

Not even the fact that he was leaving prematurely. Certainly not after you convince yourself to share your growing feelings for him, to have that snuffed out by his secret declaration.

Your chance with him is taken from you as he and George sail away from Hogwarts with guffawing laughter at the sight of Umbridge's sour face. They're off to live their lifelong dream, taking your dreams with them.

The next time you see Fred is after you watch Sirius' body fall through the veil, mind and body too numb to process any and all of your feelings. You only reach out for Teddy in your mind, a comforting voice of reason for all you'd seen. Even the strangely beautiful sight of the thestrals, that were invisible only hours before, did not phase you.

You fell into Theo's comforting embrace the moment you were able to leave the Hospital Wing, Fred Weasley long forgotten at Ron's bedside.

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[kometqh]

𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐌𝐞 𝐍𝐨𝐭

Captain Rex x F!Jedi!Reader Pt.2 of Forget Me Not Rex has finally settled down on a faraway, isolated planet. Finally, he has found some semblance of peace from the ongoing war against the Empire. Finally, he can take the time to recover from losing you, but how long will that last? Word Count: 3007 Warnings: Swearing, making out, old injuries. A/N: This has been specifically requested, and can be thought of as either the continuation of the previous story or an alternative ending :) It was going to turn into a big fat smut but my brain couldn't handle posting that (I've never written or posted a full smut before!!)

Vast golden fields swayed gently in the warm, evening summer breeze. The golden sun illuminated the landscape, a warm glow settling over the hay and Rex's figure, who was relaxing on his porch, hands behind his head as he observed the sight before him.

How many times had he dreamt of such a sight? Of owning his own little farm, of owning a couple of banthas and chickens and goats? 

Too many times for his younger, prouder self to admit. 

Where his brothers used to loudly fantasise over their ideal futures, he was too busy playing the perfect soldier, sticking to his obligations, rules and limitations.

But now? Now he had that one small bundle of joy, held tightly within his iron-hard grasp. And he wasn't about to go exchanging it for anything else. Not in a million lifetimes.

The loud, content bellowing of a few banthas stripped him of his thoughts, his gaze looking for the one particular creature that always seemed to make the most noise. Far ahead, to his left, was one bantha, rolling its body in the hay, short tail wagging left to right, continuous hums and moos escaping its throat in ground-shaking vibrations.

A soft smile tugged at Rex's lips; that was his oldest, and his first ever Bantha.

He had spent the last four years nurturing and caring for the creature, leading it over stretches of land, until he was finally able to settle down in an abandoned farmhouse, far away from any civilization.

The farmhouse itself wasn't in such bad shape. Sure, it needed repairs here and there, but it wasn't anything a tough solider like Rex couldn't handle. He got to work pretty quick, with his handy tools and a shit ton of determination, he had refurnished and fixed the farmhouse within a year and a half, and now, all that was left was to renew the coat of paint that seemed to chip away any time it rained.

But Rex figured that could wait, after all, no one would be able to tell that the farmhouse was being used as long as it looked old and rusty, right?

With a soft sigh, he closed his eyes, basking in the warmth provided by the rays of the setting sun. He was tired. It was a long day of working on the farm, planting the appropriate crops for the upcoming, much colder, season, as well as milking the banthas to make different cheeses the next day.

He thought over his schedule, already feeling a headache rising in the back of his head. The following week he was supposed to be making his way over to the nearest town, to sell whatever he had managed to produce over the last two weeks. Going to the closest town over was his least favourite activity; he preferred to stay hidden away in his little farmhouse with his Banthas and Tooka.

He preferred to relax on his porch, to watch over his animals as they grazed happily across the long stretch of fields, to feel the warm sunrays kissing his skin, to watch the sun lazily disappear behind the horizon.

He let his tired eyes fall closed, the wrinkles on his skin seemingly fading away, a soft smile shining on his face at the soft hum of the summer breeze and grazing animals, an all too familiar weight lifting from his chest inch by inch. The gentle breeze passed his body, leaving a pleasant, cooling chill to run down his spine.

Darkness and warmth surrounded him like a weighted blanket, though his body felt light. He dreamt of nothing, his mind jumping to and from consciousness, his body twitching at a sudden shift in atmosphere. His ears almost twitched at the soft whir of a ship flying above, goose bumps rising over the expanse of his bare, muscular arms as a much stronger wind grazed past his body.

But his eyes snapped open to the sound of panicked tip-tapping of his banthas, their heaved breathing and confused whines reaching his ears. The warm honeyed glare of his eyes was gone, now replaced by a deep black as he looked around, the night sky pitch black.

He must have snoozed off or something, how many hours have passed?

The banthas continued to make noise, but this time the briefest whispers accompanied them. With a strong, heavy inhale, Rex slowly rose from his seat, eyes squinted as he tried to cover for his lack of vision.

Who were they? The Empire? 

Surely not.

Rex had made sure to cover all of his tracks, remaining classed as officially dead in the Empire's files. 

Did someone betray him? 

But who? 

And how? 

Only a very small number of people actually knew-

"Hey lady! Calm it!" A familiar voice said all too loudly, giving an affectionate pat to one of the banthas. The voice, it was so.. so like Rex's.

His eyes widened as the other figures shushed the man, and Rex couldn't help the relieved smile and sigh that escaped his chest. 

He knew those people. After all, they're the ones he rescued Echo with.

However, one by one, various emotions swirled around in his head. Happiness? Of course. He was happy to see his brothers after four gruelling, lonely years. Confusion? Hell yeah! What was so important that they had to break their no contact? Relief too, he could feel the way his heart rate had spiked just at the mere idea of danger, blood rushing into his head, loudly pounding against his eardrums.

Slowly, one foot moved, followed by the other, taking turns leading Rex down the porch, towards his brothers. Towards his family.

At the sight of Rex's moving figure, some men groaned, whereas Wrecker and Omega began running at full-speed towards the male, tackling him to the ground in a long awaited hug.

"Rex! We missed you!" Omega exclaimed, erupting into fits of laughter as Rex's strong arm wrapped around her and Wrecker.

"Alright alright! Now get off of me, I can feel my bones being crushed!" Rex exclaimed, though his hold on the two didn't ease, nor did his smile disappear.  Quickly scrambling off of him, the two couldn't contain their happy, yet seemingly mischievous smiles as Hunter extended a hand out to Rex.

"It's been a while, brother." Hunter nodded, pulling Rex in for a quick hug, patting his back. Hunter's body was stiff, his shoulders tense and breathing strained as he moved away, Rex noticed. That was unusual.

Though a smile remained on his face, Rex couldn't help but feel nervous at the strange tension surrounding the batch. As he looked around, one eyebrow quirked at the sight of Tech and Crosshair shielding Echo from view and.. someone else? Who were they?

"What's going on..?" He questioned, his eyes narrowing as he looked between the two.

Echo and the figure stood in the very far back, Echo's arm was wrapped tightly around their shoulders, holding them protectively close to his chest, his grip tight as if the figure would disappear into the darkness of the night if his hold let up even by an inch.

His eyes remained trained on Echo and the mysterious figure, though Rex's head tilted slightly to the right, in Hunter's direction.

"Hunter-" Rex started, but was quickly interrupted by the look on Echo's face. His ears strained, almost missing the soft, trembling whimper. The figure brought a hand up to their face, too late in stifling the sound.

As their hand lifted, Rex noticed that all-too familiar, cuffed sleeve hanging onto their hand. 

Time seemed to slow, his chest straining painfully at the sound. Rex could feel his heart drop, the air sucked from his body like a popped balloon.

His sight was stuck on that sleeve, visions plaguing his mind, replaying like a broken tape.

Memories, memories of her.

That voice.

His legs moved before his mind could even comprehend what was happening. Tech and Crosshair narrowly avoided being collided into, stepping to the side as Rex pushed through. 

His lips twisted into a pained frown, his teeth gritted together like metal bars.

That robe.. That Jedi robe.

How didn't he notice it right away?

The look on Echo's face told him everything he needed to know, his hold easing on her as Rex reached his arms out, gripping her shoulders tightly.

"Y/n.." Her name spilled from his lips so easily, so softly, as though he was cursed, spellbound to only repeat her name, only those few simple syllables for the rest of eternity. It lingered on his tongue like the sweetest of syrups, leaving a fiery, burning trail in his throat, scalding at his heart like a molten fist, twisting, turning and tearing.

"Rex," A shiver fell down his spine, his breath hitching in his throat. How long had it been since he last heard it? Tears brimmed at the corners of his eyes, his gut twisting into a familiar knot, adrenaline spreading like fire through his veins. His heart pumped blood so quickly, so fiercely through his body, it was like a thousand fireworks had gone off in that instant. Many people have said his name, of course, but only her voice had ever evoked such strong emotions in him.

From the way she'd command his attention during meetings, her gaze lingering a second longer than necessary, the way she'd whisper it when it was just the two of them, hiding in a faraway corner on one of the ships, or even the way it rolled off the tip of her tongue whilst-

It felt like the world around had been sucked into the background, leaving only the two of them, hearts beating wildly, minds melting over one another, even the cold night failing to gather their attention.

His hands, which had been previously on her shoulders, were now gently cradling her face, thumbs swishing back and forth in soft strokes. 

His whole focus was on her eyes- oh, those starry eyes.

How many times had he dreamed of them?

How many times had he cried at night, calling out for her in broken whispers and sobs?

Rex knew it was a few times too many, and yet at the same time, it wasn't enough.

A sob left his lips as he dropped the hood off her head, revealing the person behind the shadowy figure.

Something was different. Off.

Her face, although so familiar, was now so different. Bathed in aged lines, marks, grease and dirt, and worst of all.. A scar.

He hadn't noticed it under the shadow of her hood, but now, it was ever so prominent under the blaring moonlight.

A lone tear cascaded down his face, leaving a wet, salty trail from the midpoint of his eye, down the plush softness of his cheek, dripping off the edge of his jaw. Just like her scar. He let his thumb caress the rough, broken, damaged skin, his lips twisted in a pained frown, stunned to silence.

Her hand, one that used to be so soft and so gentle, was now gripping tightly at his wrist, a gentle shadow on her cheeks, on her scar, casted by her eyelashes. When did she get it? How did she get it?

Her head twisted to the side, making the most effort to hide that side of her face from his gaze.

"Don't.." Rex whispered, no, he warned, taking a hold of her chin, forcing her to turn his way, to face him. Lowering his face to hers, his voice was strained, rough, pleading. "I want to see you.. Let me see you, mesh'la." The word spilled from his lips with such ease, like a prayer, with so much delicacy, so much practice, as he brushed his nose against hers, his eyes fluttering shut. His lips hovered just an inch above hers, feeling the warmth of her breath against his skin.

He had dreamt of this day, every night, every day. For. So. Many. Years.

He had dreamt of lifting her into his arms, of kissing her, of crying with her, of pushing her against his bed, leaning on top of her, making love to her. 

For so many kriffing years.

She's alive.

"I missed you. So. Kriffing. Much." He muttered, his voice becoming more strained with each oncoming word, his eyes squeezed shut, his forehead flush against your own as he fought every fibre in his body against the awful, suffocating need to kiss you. Another pained whimper left your lips, unknowingly acting as a trigger for his next movements.

His lips crashed against your own, his hands keeping your face steady, making sure you wouldn't slip away like the hundreds, no, thousands of dreams he's had before.

Your lips were as soft as he remembered, your touch featherlight and rough. Your hands were shaking, he noted. You were afraid. Afraid of him? You wouldn't be kissing back if that was the case.

Your scent overwhelmed him, it was that faint smell of peach shampoo that he loved so much, it was making his knees weak. Where did you manage to get that from? From the state of you, he was sure you were dying for a hot, bubbly bath. Maybe it was just his imagination playing up. Kissing you, it was addicting. He was like a starved man, pushing his lips against your own, his tongue slipping past to dance with yours in a sweet Waltz, full of grief and hope and longing and all the years wasted away by your separation, by his fear of your light having been snuffed out, like a flickering flame.

You were his light in the dark, his oasis in a never-ending dessert, his midsummer night's dream. You had that spark in you - the one that attracted individuals to you like moths to light. Your laugh, so easily evoked, and your kind smiles, so easily graced upon anyone and everyone, shining down like sunshine on a dewy, autumn morning. You were a breath of fresh air, but also a crackling, comforting fire on a cold winters night.

But he had lost you just so quickly, on that day. Never knowing, for years, if you'd be back. If you were alive.

Your touch slowly grew from soft, dissipated like cotton-candy and falling snowflakes, to eager, pleading for more as your fingers found solace in his slightly outgrown blonde hair, encasing his head in your embrace, pulling him closer as you kissed feverishly, afraid he will disappear like dandelion seeds on a spring day.

You couldn't hear anything but his heartbeat, you couldn't smell anything but his scent, one that had creeped up on you and wrapped around you in an invisible embrace, the smell of freshly cut grass and smoky campfires entrapping you. You couldn't feel anything but him. His hands, always so much bigger than yours, had completely and utterly gotten control over your body, feeling and caressing your hair, gripping your chin and pulling you closer by your waist, his lips hot against your own, his breathing stuttering and yet so laboured as his teeth clashed against your own, his eyes scrunched shut - afraid you would disappear.

Being held in his arms was like a dream come true. You could spend an eternity with him, never losing your love and affection for the soldier standing before you. His warmth planted butterflies in your stomach, and his touch ignited them, making them burn wildly in your gut, scalding and yet patching over the old scars and wounds, gently embracing your heart in a healing bandage.

Only Rex could do such a thing. 

Only Rex could make your heart beat faster, only Rex could have adrenaline pumping through your veins just by a featherlight touch, or a sweet, candy-like, tooth-rotting whisper, or a longing, loving gaze of his golden irises and lush eyelashes.

So lost in each other, for so long, neither the two of you broke contact, until Hunter had to clear his throat awkwardly and speak up to make the two of you slowly, unwillingly, pull apart. 

Rex's forehead rested against yours, crows feet tugging at the outer corners of his eyes, his lips slightly agape as he tried to calm down the galloping of his heart. 

Slowly, eventually, his eyes opened again, the familiar warm colour of honey swirling around his pupils as he gazed into your eyes, a small, pained, and yet happy smile overtaking his features. His heart melted as that same smile reflected on your face, and tears brimmed in your eyes.

"Are you guys done yet?" Crosshair's voice called from a short distance, disgust and yet somehow a hint of endearment present in it.

"You lot go ahead, we'll catch up in a minute," Rex tossed the words over his shoulder with little to no care, rolling his eyes at the loud scoff that came from Crosshair. It was quickly followed by an audible smack, an 'Ouch', and the sound of retreating footsteps.

Your shoulders shook as a breathy laugh escaped you, and as you shut your eyes once more, tears began to escape one by one, sliding down the expanse of your cheek. Rex wasted no time in bringing a hand to gently wipe away at your tears, his own tears tickling at his waterline. 

He missed you so damn much.

And finally, you were here, with him, crying and smiling in his arms.

His throat felt tight, as if someone was strangling him, daring him to say anything. His chest felt heavy, and he was sure if he was stood up any longer, he would simply collapse. 

His thumb caressed the soft, and yet ragged, skin on your cheek, the corners of his lips twisted into a semi-frown, his heart hurting, blood pumping loudly in his ears.

His lips opened and closed, at a loss for words, but his voice found a way to come through.

"You have n-no idea," His voice was just above a mere whisper, afraid if he were to speak any louder, you'd crumble away under his touch, or he'd wake up. 

His thumb moved to trace the outline of your scar, a loving look present in the golden pool of his irises.

"You're as beautiful as the day I lost you.."

[musedblues]

FOREVER AND FOR REAL

(photo edits by @pitifulbaby_ on insta)

a/n: daisy jones eat your fucking heart out. i present yet another rockstar!eddie fic. this one features fem rockstar!reader, a fake marrige, a lot of reckless behavior and lovely little ending.

warnings: descriptions of sex, drugs, rock and roll, themes abt alcoholism/addiction, mentions of abusive ex partners, god-awful rom com tropes, fantastical bullshit. sorry not sorry for this yall know i love a good fake marriage 

30k

MINORS DNI

/// New York 1988 -

"So, how did it start with you and Eddie?" The woman from the Rolling Stone smiled as she quizzed you. Her voice was low, her demeanor was patient.

"He asked for my autograph." You revealed with a laugh.

///

Sunset Strip 1986 -

The rooftop party was in full swing. Your labels oldest and most endeared studio musician had announced his retirement and everyone who was anyone showed up to his celebratory send off.

Ozzy was stumbling from guest to guest. Prince was casting smug grins from his poolside perch. You were being reprimanded by you manager in the middle of the shindig.

"Go wish Terry a happy retirement and maybe go catch up with some other studio musicians while you're at it. You can't let your last guitarists new rumors ruin your reputation. We'll need to hire some of these people to record your next album, you know?" Kelsey snarled, his cigarette-stained smile repulsing you. He was a hard ass. That made him a damn successful manager. And a shitty fucking person.

You grumbled and spun to do what he said, trying to stay in favor with the musicians who worked under your label was a must. If only you would have known falling in love with your last guitarist would result in the messiest breakup of all time. If only he hadn't spread such vial rumors about you to his fellow studio musicians and the press.

But they were just rumors. And you had proven yourself to be one of the music's scenes most prominent figures in the past few years. You wouldn't let this hiccup be the one to topple over everything you worked so hard to achieve.

On your mission to save your name, you stopped by the rooftop bar. There were a cast of patrons who parted to let you ahead in line. That was a good sign. You still held an absurd amount of social import. After asking the man behind the counter for a vodka soda, a commotion turned everyone's gaze.

Out of thin air, was the illustrious Eddie Munson. In a flash he jumped behind the mini bar and proceeded to pour the drink you asked for. He was hammered, the drunkest of any attendee. He was smiling at you as you accepted the vodka... and then he introduced himself.

"I of course know who you are." Eddie smiled, ignoring the bartender who was frustratedly insisting the guitarist get out from behind the workspace. Eddie was leaned against the counter, watching you laugh and roll your eyes. Of course, he knew you. And of course, you knew him. He was the newest name attached to your shared label, but perhaps the most famous.

In the one year that Eddies band Corroded Coffin had appeared on the scene, their music and personage had taken over rock and roll. Their tours were selling out, their greenrooms were stuffed with groupies, their producers were booking studios so far out in advance your next session had to be postponed.

"I've known who you are since your first single became the soundtrack of the summer of '84. I've had your posters on my walls. Would it be impossibly tacky of me to ask for your autograph?" Eddie slurred, but past his inebriation lied a sparkle in his eye that you read as genuine.

"Our generations most admired guitar virtuoso is asking for my signature?" You snorted. "I should be asking for yours. Could sell it for millions." You grinned back, watching Eddie's wide smile faulter as the bartender had started swatting his shoulders, demanding he leave.

"Okay, okay. I'll go." The rockstar turned and submitted with a sigh, and a paused smirk. "But only after one more shot." Eddie spun to grab a bottle of whiskey, lifting the nozzle to hold over his opened mouth, draining more than a shot worth as the small crowd of party goers cheered him on. The bartender cursed Eddie, snatched the bottle back, and announced he was calling security. Eddie had heard enough, hoping over the bar, his boots shinning across your field of vision as he whizzed past you, landing stealthily, and grabbing your wrist on his sudden escape.

"That way!" You chuckled, just buzzed enough to let yourself enjoy the change of pace. Eddie darted in your demanded direction and found a pair of elevators around the rooftops pool, busied by party goers.

As the pair of you lunged into the lift, you reached for the buttons to shut the doors fast as possible. They slid together in slow motion as your fingers fumbled over the buttons, pressing a couple different floors by mistake as the ride descended. Eddie's laughter rang in your ear as he drunkenly bobbed to find footing. But soon as the pair of you were being lowered to freedom, your ride creaked eerily to a halt. The doors did not open. The ride did not move.

"Oh no." You called, racing to press more buttons but worrying that your initial doing so was what had stopped the ride. But surely the button meant to press for an emergency was safe, right?

"We stopped?" Eddie realized, his lithe grin faltering, sobriety bubbling into his gaze.

"Shit, I'm so sorry." You turned to face the rockstar, who was just realizing the gravity of your situation. Just then a crackly voice rang through the rides system, informing the pair of you that your alert was received and asking what had happened. A nice enough woman assured help was on the way and insisted the pair of you stay calm. You started to apologize to Eddie once more when he waved to dismiss you.

"No, it's my fault for dragging you away with me. I'm kind of a pro at causing so much trouble."

"There are worse rockers to be trapped in an elevator with." You chuckled, leaning back against one of the walls railings.

"Took the words outta my mouth... I do want your autograph. Heartbeaten was the only album I played the winter it came out."

"You're a very dangerous flirt, you know that?" You warned, looking the guitarist up and down. It was beyond flattering to hear your music complimented by a musician you admired all the same. It didn't hurt how easy it was to look at Eddie, either. Leather clad, hair a mess, eyes glazed over by the night's events. You'd forgotten for a moment that you were trapped.

"Is it getting hot in here? I'd say it's cause of you but I don't really like this..." Eddie tried to play off his worry but you watched his chest rise and fall and remembered you were trapped and suddenly everything became more realistically grim. You pressed the emergency button once more and the kind woman insisted the fire department was on their way up now.

"Just a couple more minutes." You nodded toward Eddie. "We'll be out of here before you know it."

"Thank God." Eddie noted. "But I might just miss you, ya know?"

All of a sudden it hit you. Everything you'd been through in the past year played like a montage through your mind, leading up to this moment. You realized you hadn't been trapped so much as given a golden opportunity to ask a very important question to what seemed like the exact right person.

"Eddie..."

"Yeah?"

"I'll sign my album for you if you do something for me?"

Just then a loud scraping against the metal entrance broke your collective focus on each other. A group of firemen pushed open the elevator doors by aid of some tools, informed the pair of you had been stuck on the 17th floor, and escorted you down the stairwell asking a few questions about how everything had gone down.

When you and Eddie reached the lobby, a woman you'd recognized from the label's office came hurrying toward the pair of you. She had to be Eddie's manager.

"I think it's time we go." The woman offered you a polite smile before turning a stern gaze to Eddie. "You've already pissed off three of the four bartenders here tonight. And I'm sure you've overstayed your welcome in her presence, Munson." She eye'd you.

"Actually, he was just agreeing to meet me in my studio over the weekend." You blurted. Eddie was the best player on the scene. He was your best and maybe only hope. Eddie beamed at you, realizing that this was your barter for giving your autograph to the rockstar.

"I'd love to work together." You spoke quickly enough to result in a blush of embarrassment. You were usually good at keeping your cool. But something about Eddie made you giddy and terrified and everything else all at once. You watched as Eddie's manager nodded in contemplation.

"I know Kelsey. I'll give him a call to set up the times." She dropped your managers name and yanked Eddie away in a hurry. The rocker didn't go without flashing you a smile and a wave before stumbling off through the lobby. After that, nothing was keeping you at the party any longer, either.

///

Century City L.A. 1986 -

When Eddie breezed into your recording booth the next weekend, he was refreshingly sober; and made sure you knew how grateful he was for the invitation. He slung his guitar around his back and shook your hand and listened intently to your vision for the music you were creating.

Eddie's presence was magnifying. But differently than you'd expected. You'd seen headlines and heard rumors float about from countless greenroom groupies and stagehands. Eddie Munson had gained quite the salacious reputation within the year fame had found him. He was no stranger to romantic quarrels and quandaries, legal battles, displays of public intoxication, the whole shebang. You knew he was going to captivate you, he already had. But he was not so unruly as the press made him out to be.

Eddie was respectful, desperate to fully understand your musical vison. Eddie was kind, complimenting your work and the tracks you'd scrapped together so far. Eddie was brilliant, adding licks and riffs right away that you'd never dreamed you'd be lucky enough to have featured throughout your music. He helped you write what you hadn't finished. He made you laugh in the middle of recording and apologized profusely when you had to start over and over again.

He said he could only stay for a couple of hours. But two hours turned into two days, turned into two weeks. When it was finished, your third album, Steel & Stone, had a healthy dose of Eddie's input sprinkled throughout. It was more a collaboration than a solo record. It was fucking Beautiful. Your producers thought so too. They said your sounds married well together.

That made Eddie laugh. And then it gave him an idea.

"The album cover should be a wedding! I've got it all figured out!" He excitedly sketched out his suggestions for your albums cover; and because he was so excited, you humored the guy by scheduling a photoshoot. A week later you were cutting up an old, thrifted wedding dress in Eddie's back garden. He'd hired a fake priest and invited some friends over to fill the background.

The pair of you looked fetching, Eddie in his size too small tux. loose tie, hair pulled back. You, in a ragged old dress, pearls hanging past your torso. The photos for the album cover came out killer, you and Eddie looked like a bride and groom out of a horror show. It was perfect.

The paparazzi thought so too. Somehow, someone with a camera and a lot of guts managed to snap a bevy of photos of your make-believe wedding over the hedges of Eddies back garden.

The photos were all over the tabloids the next day, and Hollywood went berserk at the news of your presumed wedding to the rock God. You found out when your phone clattered to life at 7am the next day. You answered the line to a frantic Eddie, who was less concerned about the rumor that you two had gotten legitimately married than the fact that his privacy was so easily invaded. So, you suggested he schedule a meeting with your real estate agent to find a safer, better shielded home. And because he was too frantic to take notes, you huffed and headed over to his humble abode to help the poor boy plan.

It wasn't even twenty-four hours later that rumors the pair of you were house hunting together sparked interest alongside the blurry wedding photos. News of your alleged link to Eddie traveled fast, but your management worked faster. Forty-two hours after the gossip spread, you and Eddie were called in to address the rumor mill.

///

"Sit, both of you, and listen to our pitch in completion before you voice opinions." Eddies manager, Brooke, was stood before an oak desk, she was a sharply dressed middle aged cunning sort of a woman you respected for rising to ranks men usually dominated in the industry.

You and Eddie gave each other a look as you settled in opposite armchairs. This was going to be interesting. Your manager was sat at the head of the desk, eager to have his turn of attention.

"In the past few months, both of you have been in a little trouble with the press, no?" Kelsey began, gazing over his tinted glasses to meet your eye.

"Try the past year." Eddie huffed a laugh, sitting back. The musician really had always been linked to some salacious headlines since his rise to stardom. You were rather new to the negative press, but had done a better job beating the allegations, you thought.

Brooke slid a trio of papers across an oak desk then. One showed a collage of tabloid write ups from the past few days. Every word gushed over the supposed connection you and Eddie shared. It was an overwhelming collection of rose-colored journalism. The other two papers looked like contracts.

"We think," Brooke breathed, glancing to Kelsey, "given the immense positive reaction to your supposed wedding, that you and Eddie staying allegedly betrothed is a divine PR opportunity to push alongside the new album you're each equal parts credited to have made."

"You want us to pretend to be married?" Eddie laughed. The kind of chuckle that burst from behind his teeth, like a kid in class that couldn't help but disrupt.

"Of course we do. Just for five months, till the start of next year. Besides being a brilliant PR move to promote Steel & Stone, it could save your ass, Munson."

"What's my ass got to do with anything?" Eddie quipped.

"Edward, now is a good time to inform you that your label is threatening to drop you if you don't get your shit together before this year ends. You don't want to pass the point of no return, do you?" The news hung in the air with, menacing finality. Eddie's carless behavior was catching up with him.

"Settling down in general is a good look for you. Settling down with this world famous takes no shit rock and roll chick is even better. You both get to remain reckless, except now with morals. America just creamed their pants. The tabloids have already begun rebranding Eddie, let see what was it..." She picked up a daily newsprint to quote...

"Ah yes, 'From Don Juan to I Do, can this wild rocker finally be tamed?' Cheesy but you get the gist. This positive spotlight might be your last before you're dubbed hopeless!" Brooke tossed the newsprint in Eddies lap. He grumbled back a "Hey!"

Then Kelsey spoke up...

"Of course you're not in such hot waters," He pointed your way, "but the sooner we clear up the mess you let your last guitarist make, the better off you'll be."

"I didn't let-"

"You will sign these contracts." Kelsey boomed, jabbing his finger on the dotted line of the paper in front of you. The room went quiet as his voice rattled the walls. "We'd hate for the premier of your new album to be delayed while you remain obstinate."

"You can't do that." You stated. You worried.

"We're going to talk about this." Eddie stretched from his seat and swatted your shoulder to meet him in the hall. You followed gladly, anxious to get out of the tension filled room.

A few steps closer toward the stairwell, Eddie slowed there. "Kelsey is a scary fucker, huh?"

"A lot of information just came at us at once. I think we should-" You tried to reason as you stalled at his side.

"I don't want to delay your album." Eddie blurted; brows pressed tightly together. "I don't want you to have to lug me around for five months either." He leaned against the wall, jamming a fist in one of his many leather pockets for a cigarette.

"I won't be lugging you around, doofus." You laughed, kicking his boots with your heel. "I dunno. You do need a bit of a boost in the social department. Every girl I know has a story about you, Edward Munson."

"Yeah, I know. Got outta control on tours. But you know I've been doing better, we talked in the studio about how big of an idiot I used to be. But I'm tryin'. Apologizin' and shit! I don't want you to feel like you gotta save me. I'm working on that myself!"

"I've witnessed the progress you've made! Lita called last week to gossip and she didn't curse your name once!" You noted, dropping the name of the mutual friend and one Eddie's many ex-lovers.

"See! You don't need to be fake married to me. I'm my own personally savior. Hey, that's a good lyric..."

"Listen. If we did this, it's mostly because I'm worried about the album's release being threatened. And only a little bit because I would want to help clean your social slate and save you from being dropped from the label. So..."

"Awe, you like me enough to clean up after me? Gives me reason to keep making messes..." Eddie sing songed, breathing out smoke and shooting you a wink that made your eyes roll. You had been given a small thrill when you helped Eddie escape disaster upon your first meeting. You wouldn't mind having to look out for him for a few more months in a row.

"Look, do you want my help or not? My offer is about to be swiftly redacted!" You'd been moved to this major act of charity after spending that week in the studio, learning about the guy behind the guitar. He was much more than all those famous songs and infamous rumors and those silly rambled in the broken elevator. He was funny and smart and you liked him enough by now to consider doing this insane fucking thing. But too, there was a pit opening in your stomach that warned if you didn't do exactly as Kelsey wished, he would fuck shit up for you worse than he originally threatened.

"Okay! It seems like we're doing this. But no lugging me, got it!" Eddie sighed past his smoke, decided all of the sudden. You barely had time to process what you'd both agreed to before agreeing, but there you were.

"No lugging!" You echoed, rounding your shoulders as you slinked back into the room with the papers. You didn't like your work being held over your head. But you didn't see much harm in letting the rumors go on a little longer. You were looking at the tabloid cover story about what a perfect couple you made. All very sanguine. Why fix something that wasn't broken?

The pair of you signed on the dotted line.

That same afternoon, you were sent to pick out wedding bands. You quite admired a tiger-eye stone; but before you could ask how much it would cost, Kelsey had picked out gaudy diamond studded rings for both you and Eddie. You then realized this wasn't your relationship at all. None of this was up to you. But you'd be expected to act as if it was.

///

The Beverly Hills Hotel 1986 -

"Tell us about the wedding! Did you write your own vows?" A voice called from a pit full of reporters, each one of them as sly and insatiable as the last.

You and Eddie were sat shoulder to shoulder at the press conference meant to discuss your collaboration album that hit shelves the midnight before. And too, Eddie was meant to announce his L.A residency and you were meant to announce your upcoming tour. But you both knew your alleged wedding would be the subject on the tip of every tongue. This was it. The real test.

"I wanted to sing my vows but apparently that was too theatrical." Eddie joked, charming the room, shooting winks and stretching out smiles. What a fucking bullshitter.

"You've always been a showoff." You glanced to the man out of the corner of your eye as you spoke into your mic on the table before you. He was eating this up.

"That's right. I'm my best self in the spotlight. So now I'd like to announce for the next two months I've accepted a residency at the Roxy. One show every weekend until November. Dates will be in Rolling Stone this Monday!"

Cameras clicked and voices muddled over one another as reporters clamored to ask a million things. Your manager picked one man with a notepad out of the mix. His question was for you.

"Will you be able to enjoy a honeymoon before your husband goes back to work?"

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes,

"I'll be going to work myself. I'm touring this summer, a few dates need decided before tickets go on sale next week. We've got to promote this new album. Any questions about Steel & Stone? Any at all?"

The crowd roared louder than before. Reporters demanded to know why you and Eddie would be spending so much time apart so soon after tying the knot. Questions about the strength of your love and were directed at you like shrapnel. They wanted to know how two musicians with separate demanding schedules could maintain a happy life as a couple. They wanted to know why a honeymoon had failed to be arranged.

"If you must know, we're spending the weekend in Hawaii. Then, my wife and I will get to work promoting this very well made new album that you should all buy and review warmly!"

Oh, this motherfucker. Eddie was concerned about you lugging him around given this arrangement? Well, he never warned you about the bullshit antics he was eager to pull first shot he got a chance. You should have known better than to sign up for anything with this wildcard of a man.

To your surprise, Eddie's little joke couldn't be left to rest. By the end of the press conference Kelsey had your meetings canceled and a flight booked for Honolulu Friday morning. Shit, this was about to be a really weird year.

On the way out of the conference hall, you let Eddie kiss you on the cheek where the cameras could see before hurrying into a shared limo.

"Are you sure you wanna spend two days and three nights in Hawaii together?" You wondered, settling into the ride as it started zooming off. "You might get so sick of me we blow this whole thing."

"Relax babe, we'll be so chill beach side that we won't worry about stuff like that. Plus, why not make the most of this thing? Enjoy it!" Eddie shrugged and looked at you with a softness in his gaze. You saw a reflection of exhaustion you recognized. You both worked hard. Maybe it was time to sit back while the ride whirled on, for now.

"Plus, I'd rather play it cool with you for five more months than get sued for breaking contract." Eddie winked at you and popped open the limos complementary bottle of Champaigne.

///

New York 1988 -

"I wrote my first album at eighteen years old. Sold out Madison Square Garden by 19. Made three platinum records by 20. But Eddie gifted me the song that made my third album the nation's best seller for three months in a row. He played guitar on that track because I asked him too. He squirmed his way onto four more tracks because he was that charming. He was that good. He was one of the best guitarists I knew."

You bragged to Rolling Stone, watching her take notes and nod along, grinning past her cigarette. As she scribbled away you thought back to that time with reverence.

That invitation to play on Steel & Stone was never meant to be more than just that. An invitation for Eddie to play in your studio for a couple hours. But that invitation morphed into a lasting connection no one could have seen coming. You didn't regret that it happened. But perhaps if you hadn't let your management teams concoct such a devious plan to pair the two of you up contractually, you and Eddie would have been spared a world of hurt.

Eddie was one year younger than you but perhaps somehow even more famous. Maybe because he was a man, but probably because he was more talented. You could write, you could sing. But so could Eddie. He wrote and sang and played guitar and bass and drums and was a wizard behind any sound booth. A musician's musician through and through. It's something you admired about him.

But Eddie, like yourself, was a rockstar. He was reckless and late and messy and incorrigible. When the pair of you really got going, you'd bicker like bitches. When you were forced to make appearances together, the bantering made the tabloids. And apparently, sold records too. You'd seen the numbers yourself. Associating with Eddie was good for your career, back then. And vice versa.

"Next question."

///

Hawaii 1986 -

Brooke handled booking your fake honeymoon, thank God. She actually asked where you'd like to stay, how you'd like to spend your false vacation. You fantasized about a tiny little bungalow with shops nearby enough to walk to and days free of any plans.

After your plane landed and your cab ride stopped, you were left standing before the cottage of your dreams. Behind a wooden picket fence was a green home with wide windows, cozy and inviting. You hurried up the porch steps, dragging your suitcase as fast as the heavy thing would follow.

Inside was warm and homey as you could have imagined, big comfy furniture cluttered around a fireplace. A square kitchen with walls full of cabinets, plants on the large stretched out windowsills, a staircase that led to just three bedrooms. The lack of extravagance made you realize you didn't feel at home at all in your ridiculous Hollywood estate. There was more space in that home than you could fill with money or good intention. But this quiet and calm seaside bungalow would break your heart to leave, you already knew.

"Look, they already stocked the fridge," Eddie laughed behind where you admired the homes decor. "Benefits of super stardom I suppose." You turned to meet him where he stood when something else caught your eye.

"Brooke left a note." You realized, finding her scrawl on the kitchen island.

'The next three days are mostly yours to do what you please. But you must be seen out together at least once a day, given the rules of your contract. There are a row of shops a few minutes west of here and there are dinner reservations at the cities most renowned restaurant on your last night. The details and address is at the bottom of this note.'

"Right." You laughed. "It's 'our time to do as we please,' so long as we follow their rules."

"And that's the drawback of super stardom." Eddie pointed, bending to pick up both of your bags, heading toward the stairs. He announced that he'd leave your stuff in the bigger room, assuming there would be one. You announced a thanks for his chivalry and roamed toward the patio doors that opened to a private pool. Past the little garden area was the most spectacular view of the ocean, the roar of the waves providing glorious white noise.

"So... what do we do now?" You called out to your weekend roommate who you lost amongst the floor plan. You thought he was still upstairs. But as you shut the patio doors, Eddie appeared in the doorway of the kitchen with a guitar case in hand.

"Wanna write?"

So with the sun setting and nothing better to do, you sat across from Eddie on opposite ends of the cozy living space and hummed along as he made up chords for what felt like forever. Neither of you spoke much, only letting your craft occupy the time.

How funny this was, in a weird sort of way. When you met Eddie, it wasn't like you were meeting at all. It was as if you'd always known each other. Banter wasn't just easy with him, it was natural. But now, once the pair of you had been left completely alone, the silence between the pair of you was full of tension. He'd look past his curly fringe every once in a while, to shoot you a grin when he liked a melody you came up with. And you'd ask him to show you a tab or two. What happened to the effortless chatter? Why was there a buzzing in your chest in his presence, all of a sudden? It was time to get up, it had to be dinner time now.

You expected the counter space to be full of liquor, as food and drink of all kinds had been stocked. But not a single adult beverage was in your line of sight. You opened a couple of cabinets until you finally found a single bottle of cabernet. Your favorite brand too, thank God.

"I'm making pasta and opening some wine. Do you want a glass?" You called out, knowing Eddie was still one room away.

"No, no." He sighed. "I really shouldn't."

"Shouldn't you? We're supposed to be relaxing and indulging!" You teased, still only getting one glass down from the open-faced cupboard.

"I kind of just got out of rehab." He called back. The news was a shock to you, since you'd met him blindingly drunk, and he hadn't left town since you'd made his acquaintance.

"Oh?"

You listened to the clatter of Eddie's instrument into its case as you found ingredients for your planned meal. His presence in the room was made soon after.

"Went to rehab. Two months. Told everyone I was recording, managed to put out Chains of Sorrow in a reasonable amount of time to make the fans believe I'd been in the studio all that time. I've been doing better." Eddie explained. The solo track he referenced came out four months before you'd met him. You asked if it bothered him that you were drinking now and he gave you a stern no.

"You've been doing better. But not always sober?" You daringly quizzed, Watching the man you fake married move from the far end of the kitchen, closer toward you.

"Recovering, not completely recovered." He grinned, leaning against the marble island. "Call it what you'd like. I've gotten good at only getting smashed at parties and saying no everything other time."

"And how many parties have you been to?" You smiled, casting the guy a suspicious glance.

"Can I help you with dinner?" He chuckled, shaking his head to your previous question. You considered the guy before you, his loosely buttoned cutoff flannel, the flutter of his eyes.

"Come, I'll show you how to make my special spaghetti sauce." You laughed. Eddie smiled in response but did not move per your request. He stood and took a hissing breath in before meeting your gaze to say,

"Before we stray too far from the topic... I have a terrible confession."

You stared at the guy, eyes flickering from his withheld grin to the tattoos on his arms.

"I don't remember meeting you at all. When my manager told me I planned to crash your studio I was so embarrassed. Did I make a complete fool of myself that night?"

"You would have if I didn't help you outrun an angry bartender. And you did ask for my autograph. Like three times. But I got us stuck in an elevator." You chuckled, handing Eddie a knife and placing a trio of tomatoes before him.

"Oh... my God."

"I promised to sign my first record, but you never brought it to the studio... I guess because you didn't remember." You pieced together, setting out other ingredients to add to your sauce as the pasta boiled on the stove. The realization that Eddie had blacked out during your first adventure together selfishly stung. You were left to carry the fond memory all alone. Left to wonder what else he may forget in the future, left to wonder why that might matter much at all to you.

"Alright, I'm going to be perfectly suave on this trip. No more being completely stupid." Eddie grinned and proceeded to follow your instructions on making dinner. The pair of you went on to laugh and cook and talk about Hollywood gossip until midnight.

When it was time for bed, Eddie followed you up the stairs. He went down one hall and you went down another, but not before casting a glance over your shoulder to find Eddie was looking back too.

///

The sun was especially warm the next morning, the rays soothing your skin from the window before the light opened your eyes.

You rose with an anxious glee, excited to find where the day would take you, but nervous all the same. Ever since ending up in this predicament with Eddie, his company made your heartbeat a little heavier. Your connection was an amusement ride, an adventure, an experience.

When you padded out into the main room, you found the patio doors wide open. Your eyes followed a set of footprints in the sand that belonged to Eddie, who was milling about the shore, looking for shells. You smiled to yourself and went about making some coffee, watching the man from the comfort of shelter.

After your morning cuppa and a little nourishment, Eddie popped his head in the doorway.

"Hey!" He called. His curls were dripping sea water onto the hardwood, his chest rising and falling quickly. Did he run up here?

"You're getting the doorway all wet!"

"Come out here with me! The waves are beautiful."

"The ocean freaks me out, Eddie!" You revealed. Would have sooner if his declaration about going to Hawaii wasn't so sudden and so public.

"Awe man!" He rang like a disgruntled grade schooler. "Well at least come walk the shore with me. We have to be seen together, remember?"

There were resorts and shops easily seen to the west of your private beach front. There were surly paps and press waiting nearby to score shots of you and Eddie after his announcement about coming to stay here.

"Ugh, okay." You huffed, declaring something about finding your bikini. You and Eddie had signed a contract. And there was one clear rule. Be seen together as much as possible.

You found Eddie on the shoreline again and trekked to meet him. He smiled at you and asked once more if you'd join him in the sea. The waves were roaring, and the vastness of the water sent a chill down your spine. Your hesitation was answer enough for Eddie, who shrugged and nodded and started walking along the sea's edge, holding out his hand for you to join him.

He let you keep hold of him as the pair of you meandered along the shore, a little closer toward the resorts in the distance. Your ever dancing nerves fell away as the pair of you talked about space and time and the existence of mythical creatures. And at the end of your fantastical conversation Eddie went quiet, letting his deep eyes search your face.

"Should I kiss you? Ya know, in case someone is watching?" He asked matter of factly, stalling in the sunlight that sparkled through his glittering sand sprinkled curls.

"What if no one is watching?" You countered, daring to reach out and loop one of your fingers around Eddies, holding on. The guy simply shrugged, keeping his eyes locked on yours. Considering the rules, you were meant to follow, you let a small nod tilt your chin. Eddie watched you come to a positive conclusion and took his sweet time leaning in. Eddie stalled for a moment, letting his breath fam across your lips, and you thought that was curious. For a kiss just meant for show, he was sure being timid.

"Eddie, you don't have to kiss me if you don't want too." You chuckled only to lighten the tension. He grinned in response, letting his dark eyes dart across your features.

"That's the problem, babe." He rose a brow. "I really want to. More than I ought to."

That made you pause and consider this whole crazy thing. You thought of how you got into this predicament and how Eddie was looking at you now, and the billions of things you wanted to say. In the time you stayed quiet and full of consideration for how to move on, Eddie became too antsy to let you say more at all.

"Should we go back in?"

"No," You shook your head. "No let's enjoy the weather." You assured, reaching a handout to brush Eddie' bicep as if to reassure him. So that's just what you did. You kicked about, dodged waves that came to close to the shore, and baked in the sun until it started to lower from its highest point in the sky.

After running in, washing up, and realizing there was still so much time left to waste, you talked Eddie into going out. You asked him to put on something nice and call a cab to drop the pair of you off at a local place by the sea.

Per the suggestion of the local driver, you and Eddie ended up at a quaint little outdoor eatery. The staff was so delighted by your surprise appearance that they invited you and Eddie to skip the line, sat you at their alleged best table, and poured you each a complimentary glass of champagne.

You tried to wave the waiter off, to dismiss them from giving Eddie the glass of sparkling wine.

"S'okay. Don't wanna be rude." Eddie insisted, taking a small sip out of obligation. You rose a brow and sat back and decided it was a night out. Eddie had said he was doing better. You chose to believe him and placed your order for the night.

"So," You spoke. "Should we come up with an elaborate backstory? Some swoon worthy anecdote about how you asked me to be your wife? A sickly sweet first date memory?"

"I think the story we have is suitable enough. You stopped me from making a fool of myself at a party, let me play on your badass new album, and I fell head over heels." Eddie laughed, but despite himself, it seemed. He breathed out a small sigh as he settled his elbows on the table. It seemed he was trying to say more.

"Everything okay, dear?" You emphasized the pet name to poke fun at your situation. You watched as the well-dressed man chewed his lip in contemplation.

"This whole thing... are you sure you're okay with it?" You knew what he meant.

"Yeah, I mean, it's not hurting us, is it? It's helping you out of the hole you're in with the label and it's selling our album. I never thought I'd be married for real but, this isn't so bad."

"What are you talking about? Everyone loves you. " He pointed, sitting up a little straighter.

"Everyone loves my persona." You pointed, lifting a finger as Eddie rose a brow. "Everyone loves my music. Loving me, is another story. Loving me is personal. I can't imagine letting anyone in that vulnerably, anymore."

"Oh, anymore?" Eddie quipped, sitting back as the waiter brought complimentary appetizers. You were going to refrain from drinking to make Eddie feel more comfortable, but at the turn of topics, you reached for the glass to calm the jitters.

"You know how I needed a someone to play guitar on my album?" You recalled. Eddie nodded, obviously. "Well, that's because I let my last guitarist get to know me a little too well."

You downed your champagne and was delighted when a staff member dropped another off right on cue.

"Go on, please..." Eddie motioned with a fork, taking a bite of food and staring at you with curious intensity.

"Well I'm sure you've heard the rumors." You shrugged.

"I have." Eddie carefully admitted. "But I always figured they were nothing more than just rumors. I do want to hear your side of the story..."

"My last guitarist and I had a fling. And right when I started to think I loved him... well it just didn't work out. So after the breakup, this motherfuker went around telling every studio musician that the only way they could play on my album was in exchange for sex. He said that was the price he had to pay. As if we hadn't been dating." You began with a scoff. "He took it further by telling the press I slept my way to the top. Probably because I wasn't giving him the time of day near then end and he was bitter that I'd been with so many others who are far more relevant than he'll ever be."

You reveled to Eddie some of the more horrific details of your last disastrous relationship and how it ended, because he asked. Eddie seemed to genuinely listen to the details you gave. Eddie took a few more sips of champagne.

"Fuck that dude to the moon and back. You didn't tell me I had the shoes of an asshole to fill!" Eddie grumbled past his mouth full of food.

"That's because I didn't want you filling his shoes. I like your shoes. I like you. And I'm grateful you played on my album and that crazy as it is, that we're in this fucked up situation together."

"This just... isn't how I wanted things to be with you."

"Oh?" You wondered, taking a hesitant bite of the dinner that had just been delivered.

"I mean... the whole thing with the contract and the lie. I thought I could ask you out for a nice dinner, like a normal date. I feel shitty about having trapped you in some kind of publicity stunt."

"You wanted to take me out for real?" You grinned, settling into your posture.

"I did. But now it's this whole circus and it's so disingenuous. I don't want you to think I'm getting to know you because I'm contractually obligated."

"You're a sweetheart, you know that?" You smiled. Eddie smiled back, and seemed to wait for you to speak further, but you had nothing more to say, you couldn't have any more to say. You planned to keep your heart on lock down. You planned to remain closed off. Being open and willing with others had only resulted in heartache in the past, in this industry. And you couldn't imagine that with Eddie. You wanted to enjoy your time with Eddie.

"I'm not willing to let my guard down for you, Eddie. But we can make the most of our circumstance, if you really want."

"What do you mean?" He puzzled, brow furrowed.

"Ask me again back at the house." You shrugged and smiled and sipped more champagne.

Dinner went on between bits of conversation that grew deeper each sentence. Eddie revealed childhood traumas. You voiced secrete fears about your career. The pair of you laughed hard over old jokes you'd heard on TV specials and picked four albums each you'd bring on deserted islands. You each finished one more glass of champagne.

Hawaii was stunning, even at night. You wondered if Eddie made the comment knowing how lovely it was here, if he needed such a rejuvenating get away. He seemed less at ease as the evening went on, however, chewing at his lip and wringing his hands the whole ride home. You hoped you plans for tonight would change that... but he had to ask you that question again.

///

Back at the house you stood, squinting to see the midnight waves from the patio doorway. Relishing their sounds, the crash of the ocean, the breeze through the windchimes near the pool. This was proving to be a very relaxing getaway indeed. You could get used to Eddies ideas. He was off up the stairs, getting ready to call it an evening you presumed. But then he appeared in his swim trunks, headed straight for the hot tub on the patio. He announced his intentions and halfheartedly invited you to join.

How curious, you thought, Eddie was so magnetic, but every time the pair of you became secluded in this home, he seemed to hide a bit of himself away all the same. You understood it, of course. Youd just admitted to doing the very same. But the pair of you had been more than open with each other by now. What had him so aloof here?

You shrugged, and spun to put on a record while concocting a plan. Of course you were banking on Eddie bringing up the question you once reminded him too, but a little nudge wouldn't hurt. After picking a Chet Baker album to spin, you decidedly flounced over toward the hot tub, watching Eddie rest there with his gaze locked on you.

"You're supposed to join me, remember?" He called, sinking a little lower beneath the bubbling waters. You watching his dark eyes fix on yours, and made your decision.

"If you insist." You smiled. The silky dress you'd worn to dinner would surely be ruined by the chemically enhanced waters. So, you slipped it off right there on the patio and hurried to the hot tub in undergarments that were just as good as any bikini.

"Happy now?" You rang, sinking so far below the water that only your eyes floated above the surface, locking on to Eddies still intensely held gaze.

"Delighted in the throes of post false marital bliss." Eddie laughed, a breathy sound he seemed to have to force a little. His eyes tore away from yours, looking for a distraction. "Shame they gave us the rings you don't like, though." He held a hand up from the bubbles to consider his diamond studded band. Yours matched because it had too.

"The rings are ugly. But we've made it work well so far I think. Haven't been this sure of a relationship since Steve Vai, you know?" It was a joke, but it was not. You'd loved your time with Steve. It was your most renowned relationship in the eyes of the press and all your friends to date. And though this time with Eddie was a sham, the connection you had to him felt frighteningly natural.

"Fuckin' Vai. Why'd you guys break up anyway? Seemed good together."

"Steve got back with his college girlfriend around the same time I opened for Metallica. Kirk swept me off my feet."

"You and Kirk? So that really happened." Eddie gapped at you with a grin. You'd kept that relationship on the down low, though a few good paparazzi photos tried to test the limits of the connection you'd had with the metal guitarist. He broke your fucking heart, ending things when that tour was said and done.

"I have a type, it seems. Dark haired dreamy eyed guitarists." The one before you now was the most intriguing of them all. And he knew it too. He had too. The way his eyes locked on yours changed. The way silence fell between the pair of you rang loud with anticipation, no matter who might speak next.

"What did you mean earlier?" Eddie finally wondered.

"When I said we could make the most of this, if you wanted?" You grinned, staying put for a beat longer in the spot you'd been floating. What you were about to suggest would either make or break the next five months you were meant to endure together. You sincerely hoped it would land well. You watched Eddie nod for you to continue.

"Well, I simply won't allow myself to fall in love with you." You prefaced, inching closer. It was easy to move through the water, stalling centimeters away from the man who shared the space with you. You could feel the heat radiating from Eddies form- even though the warmth of the bubbling water. "But I wouldn't mind enjoying the benefits of having a partner, even if we're just playing pretend." You dared to glide flush against the rockstar, resting each of your knees on either side of his lap with calculated caution. A set of his fingers brushed against your thigh in an instant, but that could have been a reflex. You needed a yes or no.

"Wanna have fun while this is meant to last?" You asked in a hush, your fingers resting gently on Eddies broad shoulders. His other hand came to rest on your hip. His faltered smirk gave you confidence to lean in for a kiss no one could see.

He kissed you back, lips timidly locked against yours, muscles tense under your fingers. But after a couple more careful pecks, his passion grew. Eddies lips parted against yours, and a sigh escaped his lips. You had him right where you wanted him. He grabbed you, nails dug into your hips, teeth piercing against your neck.

You had no fear raking your fingers through his curls to claw at the roots of his hair, maneuvering him to kiss your lips again. Eddie did so intensely, tongue jammed down your throat. His grip pulling you closer, his hips jutting up against yours. You couldn't wait much longer to go all the way, body language suggesting that's how far the pair of you would take this, it seemed.

Eddie whined a curse as your hand slipped below his waist band, kissing hard as ever. He let his fingers drift across your form until he reached the hem on your underwear, yanking them to the side. Before you knew it you were sliding into his lap as he pushed completely into you. Eddies fingers bruised against your hips and your nails dug into the back of his neck. You both rocked together, slack jawed and doe eyed, gazes fastened.

When your efforts were exhausted and passions simmered, Eddie moved your underwear back, and fixed his shorts all the same. He let his lips press against your forehead, leaving a couple gentle pecks there. He let his fingers brush against your face, cradling  your cheek as his eyes fluttered to land on yours.

"That was amazing." Eddie stressed all the right syllables. "But please... never fucking do that again."

You were too stunned to respond. Frozen now in complete confusion. Luckily, he had more to say.

"If you won't let me really love you, I can't do what we just did again. Because I'm already dangerously close to really loving you. And it would suck to have my feelings fucked around with. I understand if you aren't willing to open up. But please understand that's where we're very different." Eddie chose his words carefully and watched your eyes as he explained himself.

"O- okay." You managed to nod. "Yeah, I hear you." It was a reasonable explanation, an understandable stance. But you felt that familiar pit opened up inside you while he spoke. And it felt more empty and hollow than ever.

Despite that, you tried to cling to the fact that you'd just had the pleasure of shagging the guy, and how divine it was to feel him pull you closer the whole time. You reveled in Eddie's kindness as he helped you out of the hot tub. He guided you inside and upstairs and insisted you be the first to use the one shared bathroom. You knew this was going to be a weird year. But it kept getting weirder.

///

The next morning, you woke just before the sun. With quiet steps, you readied yourself in the loo and headed downstairs, out the door. Desperate for the freedom of normalcy, you started walking in the direction of the shops Brooke had left directions too. After a couple blocks, a variety of bodegas came into view. There were hardly any cars or bikes on the street, and only a few pedestrians popping from one shop to the next.

This was perfect. If there was any commotion over your presence here, it would likely be very minimal. A stall selling fresh fruit and veg was being opened by an older gentleman as you admired a cart full of flowers a foot away. Some store fronts were still closed as the early morning was still new. But the handful you slinked in and out of were open and occupied by people who were more or less unphased by you. A few whispers and pointed fingers among friends, and stares and smiles from clerks was perfectly tolerable. You offered them smiles and waves as you admired locally made clothes and lotions and oils.

But men with cameras waited outside, word spreading fast that you'd made your way into town. There weren't many photographers, thank God, maybe five. And they were respectful as could be, calling your name and welcoming you to the island. You gave them rushed acknowledgement and waved them off when they demanded to know where Eddie was. They didn't need to know he was sleeping soundly in the spare room of your shared bungalow. But they could watch as you decided to buy fresh produce from the little local man at the edge of the hamlet. A nice big breakfast sounded nice.

As you thanked the vendor and made your way to head home, the men with cameras began to follow your footsteps. You dreaded having to beg them away. But this time, you didn't have to. The vendor who'd sold you a canvas bag full of produce shouted ardently enough to get the paparazzi to stay back and let you be on your way. You knew you'd love it here. You knew it would be hard to go back to L.A. but you didn't have to yet. The only thing on your agenda was to make breakfast.

Eddie was already in the kitchen when you'd walked back. You could tell from the sound of a mug rattling against the counterspace and the drip of the coffee machine. He rolled his shoulders to adjust to the morning as you carried your fresh food into the little room.

"I popped to the shops! It was sort of nice. There were only a few paps out."

"Did they bother you?" Eddie seemed to worry, locking a puzzled gaze on you before peeking in on what groceries you brought home.

"Almost. But a nice older shop owner shooed them off from following me home. I really like it here." You lamented, not taking a single moment for granted. Soaking up the sights and sounds of the kitchen as you opened the white chipped cupboards, catching glances of the ocean out the window. You announced your intentions to make breakfast and Eddie hummed past his coffee. He stayed quiet afterward, lingering as you mucked about with pots and cutting boards.

The room was full of quiet tension again. Not like something ominous was near happening. Just the weight of the obvious being unspoken. You knew Eddie liked you more than he should. And you both knew you couldn't let yourself feel the same. Knowing all this, you went on slicing tomatoes. And turning on the radio. And switching stations when one of your songs came on.

The rest of the trip was spent in quiet; shared meals and movie marathons on one particular rainy afternoon. Small conversations and one last wordless jam session.

You were really going to miss it here.

///

L.A. 1986 -

It was Eddie's debuted at the Roxy, the first of a string of already sold-out shows. He asked you to perform with him to kick things off.

Backstage, you hesitantly watched his bandmates pour him several shots. You helped him decide what to wear and let him give you a sloppy kiss in front of a reporter. His tongue jammed toward your throat, his hands splayed against your hips, and he continued even after the snaps from the camera ended. Then, when the room got a little quieter, and when you were starting to lose feeling in your lips, Eddie pulled away and murmured something in your ear.

"Felt like a real kiss. Wish it was. Wish you'd really wanna be my girl." His words slurred. He was clearly already inebriated. But it wasn't like he was wasted. The words shot a thousand feelings from your heart into your nervous system, anger being the most immediately powerful. You shoved the man's shoulders to loosen his grasp on you, his face fell. The reporter's camera started clicking again.

"You're pushing your luck." You warned. He was trying to get a rise out of you, right? He was trying to get you to cause a scene for the photographer to capture, right? He was whiskey talking, right? He said your name and tried to reach for you as you blocked his advances.

"Go toward the stage." You demanded, turning the musician by the shoulders in the right direction. He protested for you to listen, but you couldn't do this right now. You couldn't imagine doing this ever. He knew you couldn't let yourself go there.

"Shut the hell up Eddie. You've got a show to put on. I'll meet you out there. Son of a bitch." You whined, shoving the musician toward the side stage as he tried to get you to wait up. But he was being introduced and the cheers from the crowd called the man to saunter toward the mic center stage.

Why the fuck did he say all that? You couldn't stop playing it over and over in your head. Why did it make your heart stop a little? You stole the bottle of whiskey from a stagehand and went to shake out your jitters in his dressing room. You had three songs until you would share the mic with Eddie. That gave you time for a drink and a half, a few vocal warmups, and a sudden costume change into suede platforms that made your toes a little less constricted.

Just as you stomped into your last boot, a stage hand came rushing over, stealing back the bottle of whiskey and pulling you toward the stage. You stormed into the spotlight where you met Eddie, playing a riff that a steady drumbeat accompanied. He started singing, staring right at you while you added harmonies you could barely hear over the cheers from the crowd. It was the single from Steel & Stone. It was a packed house, audience from stage to sidewalk outside the entry. An Eddie sized crowd. He deserved bigger yet, you thought.

The pair of you stared each other down throughout the next couple songs, and you danced next to the bass player when Eddie broke into a few guitar solos. When the last song you were meant to share ended, you bowed, thanking the people in the front row. But Eddie spoke into the mic.

"Baby, baby, wait don't leave." He sing-songed, stopping your exit with a breathy plea. "No, not yet. She's about to leave for three months ya'll." Eddie addressed the audience who awed in commiseration. The fuck was this about? A public display of sorrow so the nearest magazine reporter could write in that Eddie seemed to really adore his wife in the middle of the review for this show?

"Why don't you sing one more song. Just you. Just for me. Before you go." Eddie looked at you, his voice echoing from the stage to the back of the venue. The crowd applauded the idea and you paused in consideration. You rarely passed up the opportunity to preform, but this was Eddies' show. You decided since he was giving you puppy dog eyes, and a room full of a few hundred were chanting for you to do it, you would.

"Okay but it's gonna be one of your songs, got it? You gotta come see me on tour if you want one of mine." You took the mic, and as he stepped away Eddie smiled and said "Deal."

You picked your favorite Corroded Coffin number and the band behind you knew exactly where to jump in almost right away. Eddies music was heavy and hard to sing, but you'd gotten pretty good at it, putting on fake concerts on the patio of that little Hawaiian bungalow.

You sang your heart out, you sang for Eddie like he'd asked. He played toward the left of the stage, mesmerized by your every move. The number ended with the thrash of a few cymbals and the crowd going wild. As you backed away from the mic, Eddie came toward you. You met him halfway, planted a kiss on his lips for show, but also partly for revenge's sake. You hoped the gesture would leave him as frustratedly guessing as his left you.

///

LAX 1986 -

"We land in Ireland, I'll play two shows. Then it's Glasgow, Manchester, London, and then France. You're coming to Paris, right?" You listed off the first half of your European leg as Eddie matched the pace you set; a steady march down the tarmac of the airport. He had an arm tossed over your shoulder for show, and his head bent in to hear you better as you spoke up past the roar of the jet you approached. Beyond the aircraft were a roped off coral of press and fans who'd gathered to see you off. Their shouts didn't make conversation any easier. But their smiles when you offered a gentle wave settled the usual despair in the pit of your stomach.

"Yes, three weeks from today, I'll be seeing you again in the most romantic city of all." Eddie grinned as you stalled to face him. 

"I hope your Roxy gigs stay sold out. You can call me to brag about em if you'd like." You smiled up to the guy, admiring his hair that moved with the gentle morning breeze. You'd miss his companionship. You'd grown quite fond of having a friend nearby, despite being almost strictly business partners. That's all this was, you reminded yourself.

"I'll take you up on that offer. You better call me at least when you make it safely overseas. And anytime at all, if you want." Eddie grinned at the same time he let a hand smooth the back of your hair. His fingers settled loosely at the base of your neck to pull you close for a kiss to the forehead, for show, you reckoned. Eddie insisted on walking you onboard the flight and you took the time to introduce him to the band you'd be traveling with. 

Izzy, the bassist, had only ever played on Neil Young's tours. The guy was excited for a change of pace, touring with you. Ambrose the guitarist was new to the scene but a damn fine player. He'd seemed to keep almost totally to himself. Your drummer was called Zed. He asked Eddie for a spare cigarette and informed you he'd brought snacks for the plane ride. Everyone was nice enough, but your nerves stood on end when you realized you were about to be far from home with a bunch of practical strangers and your vile ass manager to boot.

"I'll call you right when we land." You nodded to Eddie, who lingered near the exit of the jet. But it was less because he'd asked you to call, and more now because you knew you'd be a little desperate to hear a familiar voice as soon as you'd be able too. But Eddie didn't need to know that. 

///

Ireland was beautiful. You hadn't quiet found a friend in any of your new band mates by then. But since Kelsey was busy managing a whole new team of people, his pressures never quiet landed on you, those first few days. You knew the steps to take around that maniac of a man. What to say and withhold to keep from setting the manager off. So, things seemed to be going well.

You told Eddie as much when you rang him the next three nights in a row, and laughed as he told you a story of his recent invitation to lunch with the Osbornes. Eddie had a newer, wilder story every night. And you swore you slept better when he wished you well at the end of every chat.

You were hopeful for this tour. The first few shows flew by with ease. You'd hardly had many kinks to work out with the new band. You were able to keep to yourself. You were treated like royalty by every villa foreman, wait staff member and venue manager.

But on the ride from Manchester to London, something shifted. You wanted to blame the dreary weather. You wanted to blame end of the fortnight fatigue. But a gnawing deep in the pit of your core warned you that something was simply not right. You mulled over telling Eddie. Calling him to ask if he thought you might be going crazy. If he believed in the power of premonitions. You didn't feel like you could ask that same question to Ambrose or Izzy. They'd hardly given you the time of day, off stage. Maybe you'd try with Zed, who'd offered you countless snacks and played a couple heated rounds of eye spy with you from city to city. But what if your desire for a deeper connection scared off the one potential friend you had in your drummer? What if asking Eddie if he thought you were going crazy made him realize you probably were, and he couldn't even pretend to be your friend anymore, let alone your lover? Why were you letting yourself care?

"Practicing telekinesis?" Zed interrupted your internal downward spiral by plopping down at your side on the aisle seat of the plane. "You've been staring a hole through this page of Rolling Stone for at least a half hour."

"Oh, hi." You huffed a laugh, shutting the magazine you'd forgotten was open in your lap. "Just thinking." You sighed, settling deeper into your chair. 

"Don't let Kelsey know." Zed scoffed. "It's his ideas or nothing around here isn't it? Why does he have to kill the vibe so bad?" 

"I hope he isn't starting his bullshit already. This tour has been fine! He just has this sick desire for things to go his way, whether they're going well or not."

"We're in for a looong tour, then, huh?" Zed rolled his eyes and stole the magazine you'd shut. Whether or not anyone around you believed in the power of intuition, you knew something bad was coming.

///

The phone line buzzed and buzzed. Almost to the same beat as a drip of rainwater from your balcony doorway. The streets of London sounded frenzied even from far off. You were about to let out your held breath and hang up when someone finally answered.

"Hellooooo?" A high pitched greeting came across the other line. Certainly not the tone you'd been expecting to hear. Another wave of trepidation dawned in your gut. But instead of admitting to yourself that much, you decided to match the girl's inflection. 

"Hiiii." You wickedly grinned, hoping what you said next would wash the girl over with the same unease. "This is Eddie's wife. I'm sure he has a minute to spare."

"Oh." The girls pitch shifted immediately as the receiver became muffled. Only seconds passed before the person you were calling finally picked up. 

"You just scared the shit out of her." Eddie chuckled. "It's not funny but it's... it's a little funny."

"I'm cracking up." You rolled your eyes. "Listen is there any way you can book a flight a day early for Paris?"

"Nice to hear from you too. Geeze, what's got you sounding so serious and scary?" 

"This tour!" You snapped, but followed with a groan. "I'm sorry I just- I need a night off or something." 

"I hear you." Eddie seemed to understand. "I'm sure I can catch a flight for tomorrow. What's the occasion?" 

"Kelsey is booking a couple press things and demanding I get you to be a part of some of them." You twisted the phone cord around your index finger and rolled your eyes again, imagining the girl that answered the phone throwing herself back into Eddie's bed. 

"Yeah, Brooke can make anything happen. I'll have her get me out there by tomorrow night. Plus the press keeps doing us wonders. You've seen last weeks write ups, calling you and me rock and roll royalty, right?" Eddie smiled; you could hear it in his voice.

"Yeah," You began. "And we've all seen this morning's Star headline. How is making out with three different girls in front of the entire Rainbow Room supposed to keep you and me a happy couple in the headlines? You gotta be more careful Eddie." You ranted, more pissed than you ought to have been about other women taking up Eddie's time and space. 

"Wait, last night- that's a headline?" Eddie's tone sounded grave. "Shit. I- I'm sorry. I was drinking and..."

"Forgot." You realized, finishing his sentence. "So should I call your babysitter Brooke instead? Should I expect you not to remember this conversation?"

"Listen I don't know what's got you so agitated over there. But can you not take it out on me? I will see you tomorrow. And I will figure out a way to convince the press there are no issues. I can clean up my own messes, remember?" 

"Got it. Sorry. Bye." You finalized, slamming the phone down with a heavy exhale. Right on cue, Kelsey was in your doorway, yelling about how you were going to be late to sound check if you weren't standing up and running toward the limo right then and there. You were thirty minutes ahead of schedule. But still somehow, your manager threatened to grab ahold of you if you weren't speed walking ahead of him in the next ten seconds.

Zed and Izzy appeared, rushing ahead of the rest of the band, cursing at Kelsey, demanding he lay off. But you're already hurrying to shut up his rage.

///

France 1986 -

After a break of dawn radio interview, Kelsey rushed you along to a high-end cafe where supposedly a reporter from Europe's most renowned pop culture magazine was waiting for a one on one with you. Your manager certainly knew his was around keeping you relevant but didn't seem to care if his efforts exhausted you or not. You blinked away thoughts of a nap, straightened the ripped-up suit jacket you wore over tights, and struggled not to stop in your tracks when you glanced up to a booth to find Eddie there.

He looked sleepy as you, hair all mused, ripped up Led Zeppelin tee straining against his fit figure. Eddie said he'd make it, you weren't shocked he had. But you were alarmed, more or less, by how he lit up when he saw you. And how at ease that made your entire being feel. Wishes of nap time and bubble bath breaks didn't seem as pressing any longer. You were relaxed in Eddies presence, and he hadn't even said hello. And that really freaked you out. You needed to get a fucking grip.

Brooke popped into frame too, walking up to great you with a smile and a hug. She complimented your makeup and turned to inform Kelsey the reporter was on her way inside. You gravitated toward the man waiting in the raised up booth, grinning as he smiled broadly your way. 

"I told you I'd make it in time." Eddie sing songed, holding out an arm as you slid in the booth at his side. The guy pressed his ring clad hand to one side of your head and his lips to the other.

"Thank you." You rose a brow and nodded his way. "We're being interviewed together it seems. I'm sure our managers arranged this for a reason. I'm sure they'll ask about those photos with the girls you were out with. Should we get our story straight?"

"I think I have the right words ready. Anyway, since this whole thing is based on a lie, I think it's best we stay as honest as possible about everything else... avoid digging ourselves into too deep a hole." Eddie reasoned. 

"Well, it's not totally based on a lie, it's not like-" You began to argue back, a little too desperate to mention that you liked Eddie enough to agree to this whole crazy thing with him. You couldn't have imagined being falsely married to anyone else. But Kelsey interrupted you, waving a warning that the reporter was walking in, alerting you to be on your best behavior. God he was becoming more unbearable as the days dragged on. 

The reporter was an older woman, dressed drabber than you would've expected. She chain smoked as you and Eddie shared a diet soda and answered her questions with easy smiles.

"How is the tour going for you?" She pointed, locking her tired eyes with yours while you droned on about the professionalism of your bandmates and the electricity of your fan base and how much more connected to them you felt on the road.

"It's so much easier to get to know people when I'm playing for them, watching them sing along, meeting them after each show." You said. 

"It seems that's a factor you reap the rewards of as well, Mr. Munson. You're aware that photos of you romancing a couple of fans have been spread across every major tabloid, no?"

Between the reporter's question, and Eddies deep breath in, you felt Kelsey's gaze like a dagger. And your mouth started moving before your brain stopped you otherwise. 

"Of course he's aware.  This is the lifestyle we each chose." You hurried to end this part of the conversation you'd been dreading.

"So, is that to say you've had these same sort of affairs?"

"That's to say that Eddie and I are happily married to each other. What happens with anyone else is irrelevant to us and should be irrelevant to the rest of the world as well."

You hoped your answer would put an end to this segment of questions as you firmly glanced to  Eddie, who sat clenching his jaw. He feigned a smile right on queue, when the next question targeted his way was about how his shows were going. The interview didn't last much longer before a photographer was introduced. The man led you and Eddie toward the back garden of the cafe where you posed for a shockingly small amount of photos for the magazines cover. Eddie kept his bejeweled fingers curled at your side as you settled in his lap. You gazed down at him and searched his dark eyes, hoping he was less mad at you than he obviously was just moments ago. If he was, he played it off well, planting a kiss on your cheek as you looked back toward the flashing camera. 

When the people from the magazine shook your hands and headed to leave, Kelsey bought lunch for you, Eddie and Brooke. When the managers when inside to order, Eddie pulled out a cigarette and slouched in the chair you rose from, suddenly desperate to get off his lap.

"Why did you speak for me? I was ready to own up to that shit. I was ready to say all the right things." Eddie waved a hand and let his head hang back as he breathed out smoke.

"And I'm sure you would have. But the world doesn't care about why a man cheats on his woman. They care about how the woman feels about it. And so long as they know I don't give a shit then we stay happily married. Isn't that the point of all of this? To stay happy and get this all over with as soon as possible?" You paced as you answered, stalling with a sigh at Eddies side. But you weren't done rambling...

"Can we just forget about it? That photoshoot is gonna be killer and the fact that we're being seen together after your little tryst is gonna change everyone's minds. We're doing the right things. Can we please just not worry about it anymore? I've got enough to worry about out here."

Eddie sat up and looked at you with what you hoped was concern but worried was something closer to appalment. But then he took another drag and started to nod.

"I guess I see where you're coming from." Eddie seemed to choose his words carefully. After a few more puffs he spoked once more, changing the subject. "Can I take you out after the show? Have a little fun? You're too wound up."

You looked to him and nodded, trying not to give away how much of a thrill it really was to you that he was asking this sort of thing. This tour had your emotions all frazzled and confused, damn it. You really did need a night out.

///

You put on a badass show that night. When you weren't signing to the front row, or screaming toward the sky, you were glancing to the side of the stage where Eddie stood watching. He was all smiles, clapping and mouthing encouragement you couldn't quite read but felt the well-meaning of from centre stage. Kelsey was even bearable, clapping your back when it was all said and done, finding someone else's throat to jump down for the evening. This made it easy for Eddie to sweep you away, out for a night of good old fashioned fun.

You wound up in some burlesque pub, accepting free shots and signing your autograph on dinner napkins for a dozen scantily clad dancers. 

"I'll have a rum and coke." Eddie shrugged to a waiter, as a crowd of strangers clamored closer to the booth you'd occupied with your alleged man. 

"Is that a good idea?" You asked, careful of your intonation. Worried only a little about Eddie finding annoyance in your question. Worried more by the idea of him with alcohol. 

"I promise to handle my liquor tonight. Only drinking to celebrate the kick ass show you just put on. Hard to come down from that high and I wasn't even on stage, babe!" Eddie excused his drinking, and made you feel valuable in one suave sentence. 

"Well thanks," You nodded decidedly, flagging down someone to mix you a mojito. "One drink." You hopped Eddie would echo your number, agree to the limit. But he changed the subject as if he hadn't even heard the past few words you spoke at all. 

"You sounded so fucking good tonight. What warm up's are you doing to keep your screams so effortless? I'm always exhausted halfway through a set. Would never be able to tell if you were or not." 

"You're full of compliments tonight." You rose a brow, speaking loud, you realized. Even though Eddie leaned in close the club was still pounding with bass and drum and crowd buzz. 

"Well, I mean them." Eddie smiled. He let his eyes fall across the features of your face. He ordered another drink. Another rum and coke. He said he was following your one drink rule by not ordering something different. You couldn't help but scoff a laugh and go with the flow, not wanting the night spent by his side to sour or end. Eddie drank and laughed his way through a story about his bandmates high school prom date. He asked you where you grew up. He listened while you yammered on all the same. 

And sometime between your fifth mojito, a foreigner was handing you a microphone. You didn't know quite how you wound up being dragged toward the little club stage to sing Don't Go Breaking My Heart with a man in a pristinely applied wig and bright make up. You never saw Eddie find his way toward the front of the venue either. But when you glanced out to find him laughing and cheering along in a little wicker chair, you'd felt something in your soul settle. You felt your smile grow. You felt a reason to keep singing.

When your surprise performance ended and your once in a lifetime duet partner sent you off the stage with a kiss on the cheek, Eddie stayed sat in his chair near the stage. But he'd held his arms out wide, and you didn't think twice about falling into his lap like you'd never belonged any place else.  Eddies lap was warm. His arms enclosed your waist securely. His lips pressed a couple of kisses to your shoulder as you leaned back into him. You needed this. You'd been longing for comfort. For a care. A very drunken part of you was even beginning to consider calling it love. But the other well trained half of your nervous system shut out that blossoming idea. 

Still, you let yourself enjoy whatever spell you were under in that little burlesque club. You sat in Eddie's lap and let him hold you while a few other performers came and went. And just before last call, Eddie nudged you from your perch and decided your night was over easily as he'd decided on making it happen for you all those hours ago.

"Thanks for that. It was fun to get out, break free from a schedule." You mentioned, walking alongside the guy. Your hotel was only two blocks away, and no one was out, with cameras or otherwise.

"Of course. I needed it too. Nothings is as fun with anyone but you these days." Eddie said, slinging an arm around your shoulder as he matched your pace along the pavement. 

"Easy now. Don't have to keep wooing me. No one is watching anymore." You teased, ignoring the sinking in your stomach. Ignoring those dangerous thoughts that had started to bubble in your mind back at the club. 

"I know." Eddie replied, softly yet surely. 

His arm stayed firm across your shoulder as he went on to joke about something that the waiter had said earlier. You laughed and rambled on down the block until your hotel came into view around a certain corner. In the glow that illuminated from inside out, stood a small gathering of your fans. Four or five friends who all danced a little at the sight of you approaching, waving your records and posters in their clutch. 

"Well hello everyone." You chuckled, moving with more intention, closer to the group and out of Eddies grasp. Without a second thought you started signing albums and listening to pairs of friends tell you how much your music meant to them. You relished being able to hear their stories, to be able to connect with people who gave a fuck about you for longer than a second outside busy airport gates and vip green room meet ups.

One of the meeker girls, to your surprise, caught the attention of the man who'd been hanging back, watching with a grin as you shone.

"Eddie, can I have your autograph too?"

"Ah, you don't want mine, do you? We'd all much rather have hers." Eddie sauntered closer to the group, eyes steady on your form, you realized, when you turned to smile at him. "In fact, I'm still waiting on one myself."

The pit that usually felt like a void in your gut seemed to fill with butterflies and ocean waves then. It was getting hard to ignore the fact that you liked this man more than a little. After saying pleasant goodnights and farewells to the small group of your admirers, Eddie walked you up to your room. He did not reach out an arm across your shoulder. He did not even brush his arm against yours the whole journey seventeen stories up. The absence of touch felt heavy and hurtful.

And when you stood lingering in the doorway of your room after asking if he would come inside, he shook his head. Funny how quickly agony replaced excitement. Funny how you'd only moments ago marveled over how close enough he was to touch. How you now despised the space between you entirely.

Eddie only shoved his closed fists into his leather pockets and let his unsteady focus bounce between either of your eye's.

"You know I want to. And you know why I won't." Eddie said.

"Well..." You tried like mad to get out what you wanted to say. But you weren't even sure how you were really feeling let alone able to express that much. Your pause was too long. Eddie pressed a divine kiss to your hairline, finally closing the space in between you, but tragically ending the time you'd got to spend with him. Eddie slinked off and around the corner, out of sight, hardly out of mind. 

The hall got quiet. Your heart felt loud. Must've meant bedtime.

///

A couple weeks passed by without hearing from Eddie at all. A couple weeks had passed since you'd heard from anyone but Kelsey, constantly screaming in your ear, waking you up, rushing you to sound checks, telling you to throw away breakfast because there was no time to eat it.

When the phone in your latest hotel room rang after a much-needed hour long bath, you ran to answer after its first clatter.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's Brooke. Do you have a minute?"

Oh, how curious. The pit in your stomach buzzed with worry as your brain collected a million reasons for Eddie's managers phone call.

"I should, yeah. How are you, Brooke?"

"I'm okay. Eddie isn't. Last night he caused a bit of a scene on stage at the Roxy, he was so drunk he could barely remember the words let alone sing them. This morning, I found him hanging out of the back of his limo, almost passed out on the side street of the Troubadour. He asked me to drive him back to rehab. He wanted you to know before you found out through the news."

You let out a long sigh. Frustrated. Worried. Confused. Brooke went on to leave you an address to write to, saying he'd asked you too.

So, after hanging up you didn't waste any time pulling out the hotel's free stationary, scribing one really long letter. You wrote about how the tour felt like hell and how you couldn't wait to be home. You wrote about how proud of Eddie you were for seeking help and taking time for himself. And you dreamed of doing the same, asking him to tell you any and everything he would be comfortable sharing.

That afternoon you left the letter in Kelsey's grasp, asking the manager to mail it. The next few days, a cycle was born. Wake up. Write Eddie, leave the letter with Kelsey, sing a bunch of songs.

Then your drummer came knocking on your door.

"Do you plan on writing Eddie anymore letters?" Zed wondered, curiously. You didn't think much of it, he'd probably seen you leaving the envelopes with your manager.

"Yeah." You shrugged.

"Well, I found a stack of them in Kelsey's room. He hasn't mailed any. So, I gave them to the front desk of the hotel to send out this morning. I hope that's okay?" Zed went on to explain that he'd figured you'd want them sent as soon as possible, hoping he hadn't crossed an odd boundary. The pit in your stomach threatened to swallow you hole. The thought of Eddie sitting in rehab, wondering if you were going to send letters like he asked, receiving nothing. You worried at the thought of letting him down, even though you'd never intended to.

"Fuck man. Thank you, Zed." You grumbled some curses against your manager and thanked your drummer a few dozen times for sending the post and letting you know what you should've known better about, you guessed. Like he'd sensed you talking shit, Kelsey slinked in the room soon after, asking you to get a move on. But you'd been ready to go. Moving faster to get the sorry excuse of a man away from your sight.

"See how much nicer things go when you don't piss me off?" Kelsey called across the hall. You begged to differ.

///

On the way to the next gig, you heard a familiar tune on the radio. Lyrics you'd written. A riff of your bass players on creation. Prince's vocals mysteriously added to the mix.

"Why is Prince singing my song?" You turned to your band who were all equally as befuddled as you, stammering different 'I don't know's.'

The from the edge of the limo came the voice you dreaded hearing most.

"Sold it. He heard it in the booth and offered you a few million for the rights. I said yes." Kelsey huffed past a cigar.

"You sold my song to-" You began to see red when the ride stopped and your manager interrupted you, pushing you to get out and onto the stage. Your band couldn't help. They were being corralled all the same. Was this life even yours anymore? It seemed every move you made was orchestrated and modified by the manager you'd mistakenly given too much power too.

By then, the refuge you found on stage began to feel like the same old trap. Kelsey started deciding your set lists. And the first night of three at Maddison square garden, your first stop of the USA leg of the tour; you changed up what had been written down on a whim. Because the crowd was chanting for a number from your very first album. And who were you to deny them that?

Apparently, according to your manager, the devil incarnate. 

Kelsey lost his shit on you in the limo on the way to CBGBS, all for changing the fucking setlist. Your fucking setlist. Zed, bless him, tried to speak up in defense of the situation. But his arguments were shut down soon as Kelsey could form a word.

Thank God the club was in sight.

///

CBGB's 1986 -

Lou Reed gave your drummer a little blue pill. Zed said he felt free for the first time maybe ever. You found this out after the guy stole another little blue pill for you. It went down well with whiskey. Then Kelsey started to kill your buzz, being all charming and nice in front of strangers. And that was the most upsetting part of all. Because he was such a dick. And you hated to see anyone believing otherwise.

And because he couldn't help but pick apart your every move, he tried to stop you from ordering a sixth vodka.

"You've made my life hell. This is the only way to cope." You pointed.

"I've made you rich and famous, dear, you may be drunk but you're not that stupid." Kelsey droned in that stupid fucking accent.

"You sold my song to fucking Prince! You didn't even tell me. God knows you'd never ask first but you didn't even mention it! Where is the money for that transaction, huh? Already snuffed up your nose?"

"Maybe." Kelsey boasted, snatching your vodka from your grasp.

"You change my set lists. You deny me meals. You force me to fall in love with a man to make the press happy, to keep your name fucking shinny!" You were seething as you yanked back the glass and chucked it to the ground, glass shattering at your feet. Kelsey only chuckled, a dark low rumble that opened the pit in your stomach where fear and rage lived.

"I only told you to stay married to him darlin', you didn't have to suck him off and pout as he left, that's your own idiocy." Your manager loomed over you, his smoke scented breath blowing in your face. You were jabbing a finger into his chest and calling him a bloodsucking cunt as his smile twisted into a snarl.

By that point Ambrose and Izzy were pulling you and Kelsey back from each other. You yelled for your bassist to let you go, to let you keep calling out your manager for all the shit he kept pulling.

"You know that's a really bad idea. Go find Zed. He's been looking for you." Izzy's hold on you was barely a grasp but you still yanked your arms away, pissed. You grumbled away from the tension filled situation and pushed passed the crowd cheering on Blondie to find your drummer leaned against the back wall, all buddy buddy with Lou Reed, by then.

"Perfect timing, Mrs. Munson. I was just going to invite you and your drummer here to the Chealsea." Your ears rang as Lou Reed waved you and Zed along. On your walk behind the bleach blonde songwriter, your drummer revealed he'd been gifted a whole giant bottle of those little blue pills for the pair of you to survive off of the rest of the tour. Anything to dull the ache.

///

Chealsea Hotel 1986 -

The clock on the dimly lit hallway wall read four in the morning. There was a faint yet ever-present ringing in your ear. There were people packed into every room on this floor, bodies were scattered through the halls, waiting their turn for entry to a room. Or impatiently having a go at each other between potted plants and elevator doors. Someone grabbed you, they were crying and saying they loved you. They were begging you to sing a song as you shrugged them off and told them maybe next time.

"Too many people." You suddenly realized, gripping onto your drummer's forearm. He stalled and turned back to understand what you were saying. Lou Reed was long gone, had been since you'd arrived here however long ago.

You announced that you were headed down to the lobby and began stepping through the maze of strangers, breathing in their smoke and wondering how time was moving so fast. Had thirty minutes really already passed on your journey through this weird gathering?

Down at the front desk, workers smiles were wide as you glided up to the counter. If anyone was ahead of you, you'd cut them. Maybe they had let you. They usually did.

"Do you have any available rooms?" You smiled hopefully. For you, surely they would. For you, they had too. You couldn't be sure you could get back to the place Kelsey had you staying at. And you were in desperate need of some space that didn't feel completely suffocated by responsibility. The women at the front desk told you there were opening but none of the more accommodating rooms for guests as elite as yourself were available. You assured her you didn't care if it was a closet with pillows for a bed so long as you had a place to crash. With in minutes you were being handed a room key.

On your way to the tenth floor, Zed appeared again, this time with company. Ambrose and Kelsey were having a spat, and your drummer was being cornered with his hands up. You saw your guitarist notice you and that was enough to send you sprinting past them to get to the room you booked. Your manager started to call after you, demanding you stop. But you were too quick. You locked yourself into a perfectly adequate room, with a bed, a balcony and a small additional bathroom. This was more than enough. But it wasn't long before your crew was pounding at the door.

"You can't stay here. I've got two entire floors of the Marriot booked just for you, your royal fucking highness." Kelsey spat on the other side of the wooden door.

"Stop fucking talking to me like that!" You hollered back, unzipping your boots and tossing them against the door. God you could really go for another one of those little blue pills.

"Come on, please let's just go." You heard Ambrose whine like an impatient kid brother.

"Fuck you too!" You called back, angry that everyone surrounding you went along with Kelsey's bullshit. You knew they had to, to survive. But you were ready to start fighting against it. You heard the men bickering beyond your seclusion, Kelsey yelling at Zed to have a go at demanding you leave the room. He argued back that he wasn't going to beat on the door like a maniac, but he would try and talk to you like a human being, if they so insisted. His knock was polite. He had more of those little blue pills. You let him in.

Your drummer eased into the room as you slammed the door in the other's faces. That didn't stop your manager from shouting still, demanding you and Zed leave right that moment. Demanding Zed better not be a fucking idiot and just drag you out of there. Your drummer only shook his head and rose a hand to nudge you away from the door you stood seething in front of. He guided you to the far corner of the bed closest to the balcony. He opened the doors, letting in fresh autumn air.

"Don't listen to them." He said in a hush, hunkering down at your side, hands clasped between his knees.

"Well, aren't you gonna try and talk me out of here?"

"No. I think if we stay quiet, they'll leave. And maybe we can have one night of fucking peace." Zed laughed hopelessly as one of them conditioned to pound on the locked door. You sat, biting back tears.

"You're the only one who has checked up on me this whole time. I know the others don't want to cross Kelsey. But none of the rest of the band has even like, said good morning to me. Or sat next to me at lunch. Izzy will share lyrics on plane rides. Ambrose will thank me for rolling up his joints. But then they fuck off to the green room or the dinning hall with all the groupies. I've never expected us all to be best fucking buddies. But I've never felt so alone Zed."

You vented, choking back the ever-growing lump in your throat. Your drummer unclasped his hand and placed his palm on your knee as he shook his low hung head.

"And," You went on, unable to stop now that your expression had started. "Eddie can't call. He's in rehab. Even if he wasn't it's not like we're really married."

"What?" Zed turned, confused.

"Eddie's getting sober somewhere in the middle of nowhere California. And our marriage is a lie. Kelsey made us sign a contract. We're not married. It's all for show. My whole fucking career is all for show at this point. I'm Kelsey's little puppet and every time I try to cut the strings, I just end up tangled up in them."

"He's such a fucking devil." Zed frowned. "Once this tour is over..." You watched your drummer search for his next words. "I don't even know. But none of us should let him keep this shit up."

The banging at the door started again. Zed held a finger to his lips, stopping you from speaking. After a moment in the faintest whisper, you could muster you asked your drummer for another one of those pills from Lou Reed.

He pulled the bottle from his brown leather coat, and portioned you out two. You started to reach for both when he quirked a brow.

"Sorry." You grinned, guilty. Zed took the other pill and his jacket off, tossing the garment and the bottle to the corner.

"So, is that why Eddie has been so sloppy with being seen with so many girls, last month? You two really aren't a thing at all?"

"I guess." You sighed. "I thought we were something. I think he's, bare minimum, a friend. But everything else is just for show." You realized, recalling the tabloids recent write up about Eddies much too public fling with a girl from the crowd of his latest concert. You couldn't pretend that didn't hurt.

"I feel like no one is on my side." You struggled to hide the tears that pooled in your eyes, desperate for what you took to kick in already.

"Well, I'm here, aren't I?" He seemed concerned about however you may answer. And you realized that he was here. And that he did care. And that despite being caught up in the same bullshit as you, he was giving you all the space and time to talk about it.

You leaned in, sniffling back your crocodile tears as that faint ringing in your ears began to grow a little miraculously louder. You hugged your drummer and thanked him for listening and sitting in here and for not talking you out of going anywhere else. He let a calloused hand pet back your hair and reminded you that he was hiding away all the same. Trauma bonding.

"Can I say something?" Zed asked as you pulled away. You nodded.

"I kind of want to kiss you. But not like out of love. I think it's the pills. And the pent-up stress. And the fact that you get it. And I trust you." He shrugged and you took in every word. "Do you want me to leave now? I know that's probably the last thing you-"

"No, it's okay." You insisted, reaching out to rest a hand on the guy's thigh. He let his brow push together. His silvery eyes studied yours. He wasn't your type at all. Shaggy blonde, too toned drummer. But he was a good friend. And that was more than you could ask for at this point. "Wanna blow off some steam?"

"Seeing as how you're not actually married, I'm okay with it." Zed laughed a little, letting you be the one to make the first move. You kissed him and blocked out every thought that popped up of Eddie, and every wish that you were desperate to be kissing him instead.

Zed was warm and patient and really good with his hands. He asked over and over if what you were doing was okay. He fucked you three times by the time the clock read six in the morning. Then he helped you get dressed and turned over to give you space to sleep beside him in the full-sized mattress.

Your early morning freedom was interrupted by lunch time when Kelsey boomed at the door. He gave the pair of you a scolding through his teeth as you passed through the Chealsea, and really reamed into the pair of you on the limo ride to the tour bus. You'd be traveling to New Jersey, down to North Carolina, then down to Georgia and Florida, back up and across most the states from there. It was a daunting schedule to look ahead to after traveling so much of Europe already. And to know you weren't able to enjoy any of it at all, being under such restrictive control.

///

The next four shows were a blur. You were taking a trio of those little blue pills before every sound check. Whatever your manager shouted in your ear went out the other until the next day. You let time pass you by as you left your heart and soul on stage, using each show as some kind of therapy, best you could. And somehow, without discussing it at all, you and Zed had made a habit out of sneaking into each other's rooms each night. You used each other's sex to pacify the horrors of the tour. And that much you discussed. It was mutually agreed that no feelings could be born from the habit, and if they were it would have to stop. Your hook ups were strictly medicinal. Zed was your supplier, after all.

Ambrose caught on, and so had the others, you were certain. But your guitarist had spotted you in Zeds room one late night when he'd come knocking in search of some cocaine.

"Really, you two? How does Mr. Munson feel about that?"

"I'm sure you'd like to know. Get the fuck out of here." Your drummer slammed the door in his face. But his question haunted you for days after he asked. How would Eddie feel? Would he care at all? Would he be glad you found someone to bone after trying to shag him a time or two to no avail? Would he be pissed you were being sloppy? Would he be pissed if you accused him of being sloppy too? Would he be pissed if he knew how much you missed him?

And God how you really missed Eddie. How you hated catching glimpses of your fake ass wedding ring. How you wished you'd never left Hawaii.

///

Chicago 1986 -

The crowd stretched for miles; the open green field packed with fans far as the eye could see. The wind was welcome as its chill cooled you from the heat of the stage lights. The show was going as well as it could. Your band was in sync. You didn't even mind how Kelsey had organized the set list. Something was bound to piss you off soon, since nothing had yet. You considered this as you ran off stage during Ambrose' guitar solo, reaching for a bottle of water and a shot of something stronger.

Then the unthinkable. It was like the first time you met. You looked up and Eddie Munson was standing before you, eyes a little clearer than ever, hair longer too.

"You're looking good out there!" He smiled and shouted past the music.

"Eddie?" You grinned, baffled by his very sudden and unexpected appearance. Before he could explain himself, Kelsey nudged his way between the pair of you.

"Good! You're here! How's about a song or two?" Your manager smiled to Eddie, whose face grew concerned.

"Oh, no. I'm just here to see my w-"

"When Ambrose runs back, he'll trade off with you. Just two songs. No better way to promote the new album!"

"This is their show, not mine. I really don't want-"

"Ambrose!" Kelsey waved as your guitarist skipped side stage after his solo. Izzy was sauntering on to take his turn in the spotlight now. "Eddie is gonna take your spot for the rest of the show."

"You said only two songs!" You rang with worry. Why was this evil Brit so dead set on causing such chaos? Kelsey looked to you with a glare, ripped the bottle of water from your hand and pushed you toward the stage before going on to force Ambrose custom flying V onto Eddie.

The ringing in your ear that those little blue pills brought on was beginning to fade away. The audiences' roars dulled your senses now. You waved at them as you hurried to tell Izzy there was a change of plans and you'd only be playing songs from the new album now. The first five tracks, then the hit single, you decided in a hurry, telling him to pass the info onto Zed.

"Okay Chicago!" You breathed into your mic. "You're about to be just as surprised as I am!"

Eddie's entrance toward center stage caused the crowd to react so loudly it felt as though an earthquake could have been coaxed from the ruckus. You caught a glimpse of Ambrose at the side of the stage, throwing a fit, before turning to cue Zed to start the next song. He'd been giving the right info, playing the beat to the song you decided. You clued Eddie in, too, before taking centre stage once more and doing the best you could to carry on this concert without having a mental break down.

It was good to see Eddie. But the pair of you had a lot left unsaid. It was a sick joke, being forced to sing the songs you wrote with him, into the same microphone now. To be looking right in his big brown eyes, to feel his exhales, to be stupidly intoxicated by his presence after months, after no contact, after feeling so abandoned and hurt, even if that wasn't entirely his fault.

The four of you played a decent show, and the sold-out festival crowd was in a frenzy by the encore. You sang with Eddie and looked right at him. He kissed your cheek as Zed dragged out the beats that ended the set. But your phantom husband had never felt further away.

There was no time to talk still as your band was corralled into separate interviews and congratulations from festival promoters. Eddie was the most sought-after entity, of course. Not only was his appearance on your set a surprise but it was the first time he'd been seen out in months since disappearing to rehab. You weren't sure what excuse he gave the press this time. You couldn't quiet hear the answers he was giving journalists now, as you rushed toward the green room showers.

You found Zed leaving there and asked him for more pills, as big a handful as he'd give you. He was hesitant, but you promised it was just so you wouldn't have to track him down for more later. The blonde was worn down, dumping a few into your palm as you hurried to get cleaned up.

You knew your time was limited in the green room's shower, and you knew the night ahead was a long one. There were three more official interviews with festival promoters to complete, and a VIP tent to make an appearance in, all while Iron Maiden played the final set of the evening. You realized, as you washed the sweat from your back, that you didn't know if Eddie would still be there when you came out of the room. Or if he'd be lingering close by the rest of the evening. Or if you two were going to have time for a real discussion. So, under stress from every angle, you broke your promise to Zed and downed the handful of pills at once.

And then you were off, dressed in a new silk slip and pre torn tights, sprinting down the hall to make it to the press tent in time. Outside, Kelsey was off in the distance, shmoozing some promoters. Izzy was flirting with Lita Ford by the craft table. And you were scurrying between tour busses as dusk started to set in. Iron Maiden hadn't yet started their set. And on the steps near your tour bus, you found the rest of your band, and Eddie, sharing beers. Oh how fucking lovely.

"You've got to be fucking joking." You stood before Eddie, seething, rage coursing through your nervous system. He knew exactly what you were on about, shifting his weight as his lithe expression turned pale. Eddie shifted his weight and kept the bottle in his grasp close to his chest. You almost couldn't believe he was choosing to be so dumb right now. Led by anger, you reached out to grab the beer from Eddie's grasp. He let you rip it from his fingers and avoided the way your eyes bore into his very being. 

The boys at his side were quiet until Ambrose let out a low whistle, mentioning that he would run and get Eddie a third drink. A third. Meaning he'd had another before now. Meaning that he was acting way dumber than you ever fathomed he was capable of.

Suddenly it was all too much. As each boy noticed watch you turn red from outrage, it was like every emotion you'd suppressed in the past handful of months broke past the seal and your world began to spin. Yeah... maybe you should have heeded Zed's worry.

"Shit." You groaned, feeling your chest tighten. You dropped the bottle, rushed past the group and grabbed at the door of your traveling home. Thank God, no one was inside. Your sprint to the loo was just in time as you began to vomit. You cried, and cursed, and got sick again and wondered why nothing felt good anymore. Even the shit that used to keep the bad feelings at bay was back firing now.

You heard the group of guys just outside the door you left swung open, wondering what just happened to you. Ambrose far off muffled voice was unmistakable, "Come on, Eddie. I'll get you more beer. Let Zed deal with her sorry ass. He's been pretty good at filling your shoes, ya know?"  

Nausea rushed over you, shutting off the rest of your senses. You stayed slumped on the little loo floor, the room was small enough that your feet stuck out into the hall. Then you heard the door shut. And the sound of heavy boots clucking toward you.

"Are you wasted?" Eddie wondered. You looked up to him, standing with his fists balled up, his fingers working nervously at each palm. His dark brows were furrowed, and his speech was ever so slightly slurred.

"Are you wasted?" You shot back, still so beyond pissed off at him.

"I told you I was a recovering fuck up. Not a fully rehabilitated one." The guy reminded with a small humorless laugh.

"Why are you here?" You whimpered, resting your head against the lid of the toilet, the latter half of your sentence, a mumble.

"I'm here to see you, why the fuck else would I be? I didn't want to play the last thirty minutes of your damn set. I wanted to see you! It's been months you know?" Eddie shot back. It had been a long set of days since you'd had the pleasure of hearing the guys voice. Why did his return have to leave you feeling so fucking awful? Why didn't you stop all this shit from playing out when you had the chance? Crumble up that dumb ass contract in front of Kelsey and everyone. If only you could've saved yourself this world of hurt.

"And whose fault is that?" You asked through a whine, feeling sick all over again.

"Don't you dare put all the blame on me. I know I fucked up. I'll own that. But you're the one who pushed me away from the beginning. You told me you didn't want a real connection with me. I was willing to actually fall in love with you. And newsflash. I am actually in love with you!" Eddie's voice was growing firmer with each word he spoke. "I'm in deep fucking disgusting love with you. And you told me you didn't want that. So, I kept my fucking distance."

"I find that hard to believe." You rang through your teeth, sitting up a little. "You told me you couldn't sleep with me again because you'd fall too much in love or whatever the fuck. That hasn't stopped you from sleeping with what, three, four groupies since I left for tour? In deep disgusting love with every single one of them, are ya?"

"Of course not." Eddie waved as if it were obvious. "Those were drunken flings. Based on lust. I was already head over heels with you when you shagged me in the hot tub. I knew I'd only fall more. And since you said you weren't looking for love I set a fucking boundary. To please you!"

"Well I do love you! I don't fucking want to, but I do! I don't want any of this shit. I don't want our bullshit marriage. I don't want to be on this fucked up tour. I want to quit this shitty fucking job, oh God-"

You caught a glimpse of Eddie's face before you started to lose your lunch all over again. His eyes were wide, his jaw was slacked, his head shook in disbelief. And then what felt like a life time passed as your body writhed in agony.

"What did you take?" Eddie demanded to know.

"I don't know." You lied.

"Bullshit! What did you fucking take?" Eddie raised his voice as you started to sob.

"Zed's pills. Please don't yell at me!" You responded past tears and waves of nausea.

"I'm sorry." Eddie heaved, and you could tell he meant it and that made you cry harder. You heard his boots stomp away as you lost your fucking mind between tears and sick. You heard the door swing open. You heard Eddie say, "Get a medic in here, you son of a bitch." And you just knew he was talking to Zed, and you imagined the poor drummer lingering worriedly near enough the bus door to be there when Eddie opened it. The dreamy eyed guitarist was back in the room and kneeling at your side to comfort you while you both waited for someone to come and help.

You started to apologize for what exactly you weren't sure yet. Eddie dismissed you and said you could talk more later tonight. And you realized that meant he was staying. And that made you feel the smallest bit better.

When the medic came, he assumed you'd already vomited up most of the pills, but insisted you to come to the emergency tent for a while. You worried instantly, knowing Kelsey would blow a gasket. The rest of the band could carry on perfectly suitable interviews without you, but you knew there'd be hell to pay. Eddie sat with you, listened to the medics with you, gave you his jacket as the night grew cold. Then he walked you toward the car that the doctors called for you, insisting you get to a bed and rest as long as you could. He slid in the other side of the cab and let you slump against his shoulder the whole ride to whatever hotel you were staying in that night.

///

As Eddie walked you toward the sanctuary that was this evening's quiet hotel suite, the elevator doors chimed down the hall.

"You fucked up tonight beyond your wildest imagination!" Your managers shouts were more irate than you'd ever heard them. But you were almost too exhausted to care. Only three steps away from your room. Stubborn still, you couldn't help but turn to fight back.

Kelsey was red faced and rambling so viciously that the assistant that had followed him up was taking a step back with apparent concern. Around this time, the elevator dinged again, revealing Izzy and a group of strangers hanging off his arm.

"This is coming out of your paycheck! Do you realize that? You can't just do whatever pleases you!" Your manager raved.

"Your threats are getting boring." You stated simply, lazy eyed, hoping your lackluster engagement to this man's tirade would sting his ego.

"It's not a threat, it's a fucking promise. Have you forgotten I control every aspect of your sorry little life?"

"Don't fucking talk to her like that man." Eddie snapped, unable to cope with this nonsense any longer.

"This conversation doesn't fucking concern you," Kelsey, red faced and practically foaming at the mouth, shoved a hand to your fake husband's chest. Eddies back hit the door of the room you'd been trying to enter with a thud. He stayed a bit stunned, letting a shocked grin grow under his furrowed brow. But your composure was lost by then. You couldn't help but to begin to lose your mind.

"You absolute twat!" You shouted; lunging toward your manager who was significantly taller and was holding a stance like a boxer who was prepared to demolish his opponent. All hell broke loose. You were barely able to land a swing to Kelsey's iron build when his assistant moved to block you from becoming more physical. Izzy had rushed to involve himself by then too, much to the shock of the friends he'd brought along- who stood at the end of the hall in awe.

"You're all bark and no bite, just like your pathetic excuse of a husband." Kelsey tried to squirm away from the way your coworkers were backing him up. Eddie was simultaneously placing the hotel room key you'd given him back in your hand and motioning you to unlock the door, distracting you from escalating the situation further.

"I know better than to swing back. We're done here." Eddie let out a huff of a humorless laugh and shrugged his shoulders back in place. You got the door open just in time and let Eddie nudge you into the room first. Kelsey's grumbled curses were drowned out when your pretend husband shut and locked the pair of you in; and a deafening silence surprised you when you were only minutes ago seeking out the refuge of quiet you knew would be here.

You stood in the middle of the room, trying to catch your breath from getting so worked up. But the adrenaline that coursed through your system raged on and the overwhelm that had dawned over you in the tour bus was still shading your every thought.

"I want to go home." You whimpered. But that's not what you really meant. You'd never felt at home in the house you'd lived in the past four years. The only place you'd ever really felt at ease was Hawaii. Was that one house. Was with Eddie. But you couldn't say all that now.

You realized you were crying again when the man on your mind was suddenly standing before you and pulling you too his chest for an embrace.

"I'm so sorry. You wrote in your letters that this tour was awful but now I see they're worse than that. We've gotta get you away from this crazy dude." Eddie soothed, letting his hand brush over the back of your hair while holding you closer with the other all the while. You sank into his embrace for a moment longer before pulling away to sniffle and speak more clearly.

"He- he has me wrapped up in so many contracts. Half of which I don't even know the full extent of because he's so tricky. I don't even know where to begin." You let out a shaky breath as Eddie listened. "He's slowly killing me. He sold my music to Prince. Did you know that? He writes my set lists. He times my meals. I'm supposed to be living the dream, but it feels much more like a nightmare." You groaned, hanging your head in your hands.

"He what?" Eddie asked, alarmed. You knew Kelsey was pulling fucked up shit, but in the midst of it all, it seemed all too impossible to retaliate against. The man you'd been missing was standing before you now, reaching out a hand to brush his fingers against your wrist. Eddie's hand stroked toward your shoulder as you wiped your eyes and took a deep breath in.

"He also threatened me into pretending to marry this really cool guy. Who I'm really in love with now. But I'm so scared this guy'll never want to really be with me. And when our contract is up, he'll be free to fall for someone without being obliged."

Eddie watched as you spoke, biting into a frown that drooped lower still.

"You're gonna make me cry." Eddie breathed a laugh through his nose as a sheen covered his big brown eyes, and his hands found either side of your face.

"Cryin' because you know I'm right? Or cryin' because you know I'm wrong?" You dared to ask, fearful all the while your heart really couldn't take it if he turned you down now.

"Are you crazy? What part of 'I've loved you since the Hawaiian hot tub' don't you understand?"

Bitting back a smile, you took a beat to look into Eddie's dark dreamy eyes. Your brain was almost to fogged by the chaos of the day to fully comprehend the conversation you were having right now. But your heart seemed to understand, as it settled and warmed within you.

"You sobered up fast, huh?" You joked, but not really, as your eyes focused back and forth between his.

"I don't know why it's so hard. Maybe I need longer than three months in rehab. God it's so embarrassing."

But you got it. This lifestyle wasn't for the tender soul. But a tender soul always made the best art. And self-medication was the quickest method to suppressing the madness.

"Hey," You shook your head, catching Eddies eye. "No more talking about all this shit tonight. We'll figure it out soon enough, won't we?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I hope so." Eddie nodded, sucking in a breath and drawing out its release. "Come on then... let me take care of you for once."

Eddie dragged you into the bathroom, filled up the tub and dimmed the lights. He joined you in the water and washed your hair and kissed your shoulders. He held you close enough to feel his heart beating. He dried you off and helped you slip into your pj's and joined you in bed for what you realized was the very first time. It was early by rockstar standards. Only ten. Still early enough to catch a special on the telly, the perfect white noise that sent you drifting off in Eddie's arms. And just before sleep, you felt the peace of belonging you'd wished for when you dreamed of home.

///

The next morning you were awoken by a cart of food being pulled in by the wild haired guitarist.

"Didn't mean to wake you, sorry love. Food can wait if you're still tired."

"Don't you have a show to play or an interview to film or anything? How are you still here?" You wondered, staying cocooned under the duvet.

"I've got nothing. I was actually going to ask if you minded me staying a few nights on tour with you. We are still contractually wed. But more importantly I really fucking missed you, ya know?"

"Do you really want to stay? It's no fun."

Just as Eddie started to answer, the door to your room that had been unlocked from Eddie's breakfast delivery, swung open. Kelsey barged in, rolled up papers in hand. You assumed they were the doctor's notes left from last night. They'd ordered you to a day of rest.

"You're one lucky fucker, you know that? You might get to be babied today but you're making up the interviews I had to cancel before we leave at six tomorrow morning."

"What are you gonna do Kelsey, drag me out of fucking bed?" You sat up and spat right at the guy. "I'm not some fucking pet you can leash up and show off. I'm a person! With a soul! I guess I can see why that's hard for you to comprehend, being the leach you are."

"You need to leave. Don't come back today. I will call security if you do." Eddie walked towards Kelsey, beginning to back him out of the room. The manager laughed lowly.

"Well aren't you two cute? Treacherous nobodies." Kelsey tossed the rolled-up papers at you before turned to leave.

"What a fucking prick." Eddie growled, picking up the papers that had floated each and every direction. He tossed them on the desk and moved to sit on the bed at your side.

"So what'll it be? Pancakes? Or back to resting?" The guy reached out a hand to brush a strand of hair from your face. Just as you grinned and opened your mouth to answer there was another persistent knock at the door.

"It never ends!" Eddie chimed.

"I told you it's no fun here." You shrugged pointedly. "Will you answer again?" You were gonna choose going back to sleep, if the fates would allow. Your body ached from its efforts of violent sick the night before. Your mind ached from exploding under the pressure of it all, last night.

"Oh, hi." Eddie opened the door to Zed. His hair was mused. He was clad in only a robe and boxers. And he held a paper in his hand.

"Was Kelsey just here?" The drummer looked anxiously from Eddie to you, back to Eddie.

"Yeah, why?" Eddie assured, seemingly worried.

"Did he leave you papers? Because it's our bank statements. And they're way fucking wrong, at least on my end." Zed held up his bluish tinted sheet that looked just like the one sitting on the table of your room. You didn't feel very tired anymore. You rushed to stand, grabbing the document and scanning the words and numbers on the page.

"There are hundreds missing. Maybe more. And it's all charged under 'miscellaneous funds.' What the fuck is this?" You waved the page before both boys, alarm bells whirring in your head. When Kelsey threatened to pull from your paycheck he wasn't kidding.

"We've had almost mirrored spending habits as the month before yet more is being taken out this time?" Zed shuffled documents until he reveled last month's invoice, pointing out the differences.

"My lawyers are Kelsey's lawyers. What should I do?"

"I'm gonna go to the lobby and call Brooke. I've just had an idea that should hopefully help you all." Eddie noted in a hurry. He nodded to you and brushed past Zed on a sudden mission.

"Fuck dude. It's like, never ending." You wanted to cry but were probably too dehydrated to produce tears at this point.

"I'm going to make sure the others know but..." Zed spoke, shifting his weight in the doorway. "Are you okay?"

"I will be, I think. I don't know. Probably no more little blue pills, yeah?"

"Oh, I already flushed em." Zed assured. "And I assume I won't be getting any more late-night visits either?" The drummer scratched the back of his head and looked to you like a sad little puppy. He wasn't in love with you. And you had nary a feeling for him. But the pair of you had found comfort in your routine hookups.

"I don't know. It's not like Eddie and I have anything officially going on. But I can promise you, you'll be the first to know when I've got my shit figured out, yeah?"

Zed nodded and told you to get back to bed, and thanked you for having a meltdown grand enough to allow everyone else a day off too. You shot him a middle finger and chuckled your way back under the hotel sheets.

///

Kansas 1986 -

Eddie hadn't left your side since Chicago. The last night you spent there he'd called Brooke and asked her to sneak into Kelsey's office in L.A. to go through his files. The brave soul did just that, and found a fax Kelsey had sent to himself of a new contract where he forged the bands signatures and decided to charge you each more monthly. Brooke called you in Detroit and set you up with some well renowned lawyers. You had big plans to fuck Kelsey's shit up after the tour. There were only seven shows left. And you weren't in the business of disappointing your fans.

Kansas was pretty beautiful, the sun shone, your plans were coming together, Eddie spent a lot of time sober and reading a paper back with his head in your lap. Your tour bus pulled into the finest hotel available. You were an entire day ahead of schedule. And there was nothing to do with it.

"Let's go to dinner some place nice, no late-night pub. Wanna?"  Eddie coaxed, crash landing to sit on the edge of this weekends bed. You watched him in his own amusement, grinning as the mattress continued to spring. 

"Sure, that sounds like a nice change of pace." It wasn't to say that you'd been starved of fine dining experiences on this tour. But the past few days had been nonstop with no time to relish or relax outside of the tour bus.

Before you knew it you were dressed to the nines, hanging off of Eddies arm as he escorted you out of the back of the resort where your limo waited. Unsure where exactly you headed, Eddie had taken care of asking the front desk for the nicest eatery nearby. 

A castle like building with French style cuisine it was. Skipping ahead of reservations and smiling politely to wait staff, you wound up settled comfortably in a leather booth, sipping a lemonade and staring at Eddie. He leaned both elbows on his side of the table and stared right back at you.  

"Thanks. For dinner. And for staying on the road with me. And for... well everything I guess."

"It's been truly the least I could do. You shouldn't be saying thanks at all. I should be saying sorry for how much of an embarrassment I've been to you, like, since the dawn of our meeting." Eddie spoke up, twirling the straw in his soda.

"Don't start that-" You tried to stop his groveling, shaking your head.

"I am sorry. We agreed to this marriage to help each other's image, more or less. And I've been parading around like a fool."

"Maybe. But you also got us a trip to Hawaii that changed my life a little. And you're here with me now. You've been better to me than you give yourself credit for." You grinned, searching Eddies deep wide eyes. He squinted as if to consider the weight of your words. He let the chatter of the atmosphere grow louder as silence settled in the space between you. One sip of your drink. Two. Three.

"So, what... how..." Eddie started, struggling to choose his words until he just came right out with it. "Do you really love me?"

"I really do." You nodded, letting your head bob more assuredly as you thought on your statement. "I'm not sure when it happened but I can promise you, you'll break my heart when you leave."

"Well, I don't want to leave." Eddie shook his head, seemingly worried, like he was about to be swept off into a void. "I don't want to leave you. I know I have to go back to L.A. soon but, that's not what we're talking about here."

"It's not." 

Just then, your kind waitress breezed by, offering refills and desserts. You declined both and decided to call it a night, hoping to get some proper beauty sleep in since you had a night free enough to do so. The pair of you breezed out of the restaurant, flashing smiles to the fans who'd gathered outside of the business after learning you were dining inside. You shouldered your way into the limo without too much fuss, and then turned to find Eddie settling at your side. 

And when he looked back at you, it was like the whole world made sense. It baffled you. Here in the middle of America, without a single prompt, it felt like your world just shifted on its axis all because of the smile that reached Eddie's eyes when they locked on yours. Maybe it was the effects of a proper meal settling in after probably too long without one. Or maybe the tour had finally driven you mad beyond comprehension.

But by the time you got back to the hotel, you weren't so naive. You realized that the wall you'd built up that guarded your heart from this man had finally crumbled, the last brick blown over after your conversation at dinner. 

"Eddie-"

Like a mind reader or a braver soul, the man in question spun around from locking the hotel door to grab your face and kiss you. And you got it then. You got why he couldn't have done this with you, if he'd been half as in love with you as you were with him right in this moment. You understood why it would have wrecked him. But you got to kiss him now, letting your soul settle as he kissed you back.

It was as if you'd never done this before. With Eddie or anyone. A carnal desperation washed over you, now that the waiting was over. Your hands traced the inside of Eddie's leather jacket, falling until they reached his belt. As your fingers started to undo the thing, Eddie pushed them away. Oh no, he was about to stop you again, wasn't he? 

"We have all night." Eddie explained, saving your heart from sinking to your stomach. "Slow?"

"Yeah, I like that idea." You smiled, letting Eddie gaze at you through hooded eyes, pressing his smile to your cheek for a kiss. He let his lips wander from your jaw to your neck as his hands trailed from your sides to your back. 

This was all you'd ever wanted from him. This was more than you'd ever let yourself have with him. His body firm against yours. His heart on the table. God, you'd nearly forgotten you were in the midst of a tour that made you nearly consider quitting this business entirely. You'd nearly forgotten you'd ever been hurt at all. 

You simply soaked up the way Eddie peeled off your layers one at a time, taking forever to do so. He laid you down and let you rip away his shirt. He smoothed his hands over your skin and let you tangle your fingers in his hair. 

Dusk cast through the curtains, coloring the room a dull purple. Eddie marveled at the beauty of the evening and moved his kisses down your stomach. Eventually his lips met the middle of you and his kisses were unrelenting. As tortuously slow as he'd taken his time to wind up between your legs, he made up for by working you up into a frenzy in the matter of seconds. And then he claimed he had only just begun; Eddie announced his plan to make you come undone as many times as he could muster before you were each too tired to go on.

He kept his word, sending stars into your vision over and over as the night turned black. You returned every favor, dragging out your efforts to drive Eddie wild until he absolutely couldn't stand it any longer. When it came time for the guy to press himself all the way into you, overwhelming peace filled your heart so full it frightened you. You were almost moved to tears by how in utter fucking love with Eddie Munson you were. Unsure how else to express those profound emotions in a time like now; you let your jaw slack and your breath catch as the weight of these intense feelings and realizations wracked your body and soul. 

Eddie's eyes were focusing on yours then, and with a smile he sighed, "I know." And somehow, you believed that he somehow truly did have an understanding of the exact feeling you struggled to articulate. Still, you barely got to relish the way his hips rocked into yours before he was losing composure. But still, it was beautiful to watch Eddie reach his peak, straining against you. Because of you.

Eddie was crashing at your side, spent and sleepy and so fucking beautiful. 

///

The next morning came too soon. You knew last night was a one off, for now. You knew there were days that waited just ahead that demanded attention you worried you didn't have patience for. You knew you needed to hold onto last night for all it was worth, when morning came.

Eddie woke up, slinging an arm surer around your middle, groaning about not wanting to ever get up. You chuckled and shifted your weight to sit up ever so slightly. You had time left to laze, but not much. So you knew your question needed to be asked right away. 

"Eddie." You whispered, grabbing the hand he left splayed across your stomach, bringing his knuckles to your lips. The guy lifted his mussed head of hair and let his dark eyes flutter to meet yours. He propped himself up on his elbows and pressed his own lips to your shoulder.

"Eddie... What are we doing? What happens now?"

"I want something real with you." Eddie lifted his face to find yours. He was smiling at first but it faltered before he spoke up again. "But I think we need to figure out our shit first. Let our dumbass contract end. Get you through this tour and away from Kelsey. Get myself off the fuckin' bottle. Then maybe we can live life together instead of just trying to survive it."

"I see." You mulled over his statement, still holding his knuckles in your grasp.

"All that to say I want to see you all the time. I want this with you all the time. But I don't want to make you promises I'm afraid I'll break. I meant what I said about staying in rehab longer than three months, this time."

"Is that why you're going back to L.A.?"

"I already asked Brooke to find me a residency." The announcement was a happy one. But it meant his leaving was soon and it meant his absence would be significant. It meant mornings in sheets and sunlight were further away than you'd recently hopped.

"Can I come visit you?"

"I don't think I could fully heal if you didn't."

///

Topeka wasn't the most glamourous city. But deep in the heart of the Midwest, the wildest shit seemed to be going down. Your green room was full of groupies, clowns, bikers, freaks of all kinds. There was probably nothing left to do in the middle of tornado alley than to go a little crazy.

Maybe that's why you weren't surprised when you found Eddie backstage. Maybe that's why you weren't disappointed. Maybe that's why you didn't stop Eddie when he let some pink haired punk rocker pour a shot down his throat. 

But then he saw you and he smiled. He fucking smiled. And you couldn't help but let outrage burst from your being at that point. Marching through the crowd, you plunged a hand out to grab Eddie's sleeve, yanking him away from the madness. All around you people were laughing and yammering and singing, lost in their own plots. Eddie wasn't laughing anymore. He wasn't smiling. He was protesting as you dragged him behind you, around the corner toward a row of backstage showers. Secluded in the tiled room, you let go and turned to face him, Eddie didn't even look like himself. His eyes were glassed over, his demeanor barely held together.

"What the fuck?" You yelled. "Just because you have a room booked at rehab doesn't mean you get a free bender. Stop trying to kill yourself!"

"I- thinking..." Eddie rose a finger, pointing your way before he huffed a small curse, losing his balance, staggering toward the wall.

"You're a fucking mess. I don't even know what to do." You wanted to cry, you wanted to yell at him until he sobered the fuck up and promised to stop this bullshit forever. For good. He stayed leaning against the wall, furrowing his brow, closing his eyes as a you shouted his way.

"You're not the only one this shit is hard for!" Eddie slurred back, opening his eyes and gesturing your way.

"What are you talking about Eddie?"

"This is too hard. I'm too-" He huffed a frustrated sigh, too drunk to possibly convey a proper expression. Still, to the best of his shitfaced ability, he tried. "I'm too fucked up for this job. I'm too fucked up for you. I think I'm always gonna be. So... so jut go back to Zed. Or something. I'm gonna fuck this up. I don't want to but-" His words slurred so close together it may have been impossible to understand him if you didn't know him so well. There were tears welling in his eye's as he rambled, and every word went straight to the pit in your stomach.

"Eddie, baby, listen-"

"No, you gotta go on stage!" He waved a hand for you to hurry away. It was true, but your concerns for him were increasing by the second. Stagehands poked their head in the locker area, calling your name, insisting you hurry. You called back to them to find Kelsey, God how you wished anyone else would be in charge enough to help. When your sleezy ass manager finally rushed in, you told him you refused to go on stage until you saw Eddie put into a cab and escorted back to your hotel. Because there were people watching, Kelsey did as you said.

You played that show with your heart in your throat. You sang with your brain turned off. You tried to remember how great last night was. But tonight scared you too bad.

///

You didn't get on the tour bus. You didn't let Kelsey threaten you to stay for the after party. You rushed to hail a cab and paid the driver far more than anyone ever should have to book it to the hotel.

The driver was brilliant. But the ride seemed to last forever- every second, a threat, in your mind. You worried almost to the point of getting sick. What if they hadn't dropped him off in the room like you demanded? What if he got out and went to a bar or got lost? What if something far worse happened?

You ran inside the fivestar lodge and sprinted to the elevator. You pressed the button to your floor a dozen time, willing it to move faster, muttering your will outloud. The elevator doors creaked shut as you pressed the button again and again, beyond desprate to get upstairs. The indicator passed the second floor. Then it passed the third. And then your ride screeched in an unfamiliar tone, stalling before the arrow could make it to the fourth floor. No.

"This is a sick fucking joke!" You cried out to no one, kicking the doors of the elevator that stalled between floors. You cried and cried and pressed the button again a dozen times before back up, accepting your fate, letting your shoulders hit the wall as you stood alone in tears. Maybe Eddie was right somehow. This was never going to work. Maybe you were destined to break each others hearts. You almost let the grim thought take over your mind. You almost let that conclusion be the finale one to make.

But then you remembered the look in Eddie's eyes last night, when he pinned you against the mattress. And the look in his eyes at dinner. And from the side stages and passenger seats and press junkets. Maybe it was destined to fall apart with Eddie. But you weren't gonna go down without a fight damn it. 

Pushing yourself from the wall, you cursed and pounded the button until the elevator screeched into motion again, rising passed the handful of floors it took until your destination. You practically pried the doors open when you got to where you needed to be, racing down the hall, fumbling your key from your pocket. 

Eddie was there, slumped halfway on the foot of the bed, like he couldn't make it the rest of the way. Empty cans a littered near the bin by the door. Kicking past them, you moved to shake Eddie's shoulders. He grumbled at your jostling him, but nothing you could understand. You cried and tried your best to move him to a more sensible position in the middle of the mattress. You cried and rolled over to kneel by the bedside telephone. It rang twice before she answered.

"Brooke, you need to come get him." You cried. 

"I'm on my way." She assured; without an ounce of hesitation or question or anything but allegiance.

You stayed up, checking Eddie's pulse that never faltered, sniffling back tears for this whole fucked up situation. You stayed up writing a letter to Eddie, promising him things with Zed weren't going to work out. Promising nothing would work out with anyone but him. Promising you'd come visit Eddie in rehab and that you actually loved him more than you knew you were capable of. That even though you were scared too, you were willing. Promising you were proud to call yourself his wife even if you were never actually married. Then you signed your name at the bottom, finally giving him that autograph he'd once asked for.

Brooke was there six hours later. Dressed to the nines, slipping in the room unsurprised by the scene, reaching out to hug you without asking. You let the woman hold you for a moment as you focused on taking deep breaths and convincing your nervous system help was here and happening.

"Thank you for giving a fuck about him. And helping him. For coming all this way." You shuddered a breath and looked to the woman with kind eyes and a killer fashion sense.

"I care about Eddie. I care about you too, you know?"

Brook went on to say that if you ever wanted to call her to talk, her line would always be open. And if you ever wanted to call her to replace Kelsey, she'd gladly represent you. She went on to curse the man in charge of your career, insisting you deserved better than the treatment he gave you. You struggled not to keep on crying as you thanked her a billion times more, and moved to deal with Eddie.

As you and his manager sat up the man, he seemed to wake up from his stupor. Still out of it enough to stay silent, but alert enough to help as you and Brooke dragged Eddie out of the room- and to another stupid fucking elevator and out of the back of the hotel. You had packed his things and stuck your letter in his bag. No doubting he'd receive it in a timely manner.

Outside, Brooke left you to bear all of Eddie's weight as she opened the limo door. In that time, Eddie tried his best to support himself more fully, grabbing at your shirt and yanking himself up to look at you. His eyes were brimmed with tears, still dark and beautiful. Still your favorite pair. 

"You promised." Eddie winced. "No lugging me around." You had a firm hold around his waist, and under his arm. You remembered the deal you made before signing the contracts. You remember what he referenced.

"Not lugging. Helping. That's what I promised." You sniffled, letting more tears fall as you brushed back Eddies hair. His eyes closed and his brow furrowed as you guided him toward the limo. Brook shut his door and promised to phone you. Then they were off. The car sputtered to start and turned down the alley and you stood there all alone again.

///

The next few nights went by in a blur. Texas was hot, Colorado was pretty, Oregon could have been fun, but it wasn't. You allowed yourself no time to think or feel or wonder. You focused solely on the music and getting off this God forsaken tour.

Kelsey went flying down the halls of a casino in Vegas when Ambrose tried to call him out for stealing money from you lot. It resulted in a physical altercation where the manager had your guitarist by the collar against a wall, but the staff security team broke it up and Ambrose slumped off to the lobby bar instead of responding when you asked if he was okay.

That night you stayed up late on the bus to Phoenix, staring at the screen of the telly mounted near the cabinets.

"You're doing that thing again." Zed appeared, looking down at you with tired eyes. "Where you stare a hole through whatever is in front of you."

"Yeah." You sighed. The drummer seemed to decide something, and moved to sit at your side- handing you the joint he'd been smoking. After a beat, he asked if you'd found any good lawyers. You mentioned that you in fact had. Sometime around Detroit, Brooke had phoned you with more information than you knew what to do with and a list of people rallied to help.

 Silence fell between the pair of you once more as a late-night show began to air. You halfheartedly listened to the host relay news updates while passing Zed's joint back and forth. And then a certain topic demanded your full-blown attention.

"Corroded Coffin announced a hiatus tonight, disappointing fans who'd recently been promised an upcoming tour." The late-night host made a joke about the metal groups fans being a bunch of softies. "Yeah, apparently, lead singer Eddie Munson checked himself into rehab for a whole year..." Whatever joke that crackled through the screen next was lost on you, as your eyes brimmed, full of pride and fear. Proud for how Eddie was being public now about his absence from the scene. And fearful for what was next to come. 

A lot could happen in a year. A lot needed to happen in a year. But what if it didn't go how, you all hoped? What if your attempt to hold Kelsey accountable backfired? What if you were never able to get free? What if Eddie found a nice girl down the hall from whatever room he booked and forgot all about how badly he said he wanted a real shot with you? 

"We'll still be friends, right?" Zed pipped up, taking the joint from your grasp and passing you a stray tissue instead. "Way less codependent? More morally supportive?" 

"I'd like that, yeah." You sniffled and smiled to the drummer whose presence had been a surprising safe place for you through this whole mess. You thanked him for being there and for understanding the time and place for your vice driven alliance had come to a close. But after a newly born secret hand shake it was decided that you'd still be glad to call each other a friend.

///

L.A. 1986 -

The holidays fast approached by the end of that tour. Your Christmas was shrouded by legal documents. Kelsey hadn't spoken to you since you'd served him those papers. He didn't even look your way in the court room. 

When the new year kicked in, you spent most weekends visiting Eddie in rehab. You'd play a round of cards and tell him how good he looked and listen as he spoke about how much better he felt too. You each dreamed of life after he got out. Movie dates and song writing sessions. You each parted ways with a well-meaning embrace and sometimes a small kiss or two. 

While awaiting the verdict to your case against Kelsey, you declined your labels deal for a new album. You phoned Brooke instead and asked her to book you a trip to Hawaii. You started packing that night, unsure when you'd leave or for how long. But your trust in Brooke's ability to work miracles remained steadfast. So when your phone clattered and you answered to the sound of her voice, you weren't surprised by the glee in her tone. 

"Do you want the good news or the bad news first?" She asked. Her question faltered your grin and opened the pit in your stomach. Hadn't she just said hello cheerfully as ever? 

"Uh-" 

"The bad news is that old house you wanted me to rent again is no longer available. I can't book it for you." Brooke interrupted, voice flat and tone descending.

"Oh, I see." You shrugged, not half as hopeless as you'd expected to be by her bad news. You expected much worse. But you were pretty bummed. That home was the only one you had in mind, the only space you imagined finding true peace in for your planned getaway. The only home on your mind since you'd left it. You and Eddie had so much fun there. Sure, there were moments filled with awkward silence and questionable decisions made there too. But that little Hawaiian home had your heart damn it.

"But the good news is, it's for sale. And I asked them to hold off on accepting offers until I called you." Brooke rushed to inform. Oh. Now this was very good news indeed. You asked a couple times if she was joking. You knew she wouldn't do that. But you just couldn't believe you had an opportunity much grander and more promising ahead of you. Potentially more than a suitcase to pack.

Without any hesitation you formed a plan. Two days later Brooke sat next to you on a plane, a bundle of hundreds in hand and every pair of fingers crossed. You rented a chic little motel room for one night, and abandon your things there soon as they hit the shelves. You had a house to go buy. 

It all happened so fast. You made an offer any relator would be a fool to refuse, cash in hand. In the matter of an hour and a half meeting, you were signing your name on a dotted line and being handed the keys to a door you'd opened a few times before. It was yours. It was all yours now.

Brooke took you to dinner to celebrate. You bought her desert and asked her what more you could do as thanks. She had done so much for you, more than she ought to have done. The stunning woman shook her head and smiled and reminded you friends didn't owe friends anything. All she cared to ask of you was to make this year better than the last. To see you happier would be enough thanks for Brooke.

The flight back to L.A. was surreal. You spent it planning paint colors and writing a list of movers to call and dates to settle. 

And as soon as your plans were solid and your bags were packed, another weekend rolled around. It was time to see Eddie again. You drove to the rehab in the middle of nowhere and felt something like melancholy weighing in your gut. Something bittersweet in the back of your throat. Things were never going to be the same. 

 The halls were bright white, sunlight making the tile floor shimmer. Residents you'd come to recognize pursed polite smiles your way as you turned corners to find Eddie. You knew where he would be. At the picnic tables in the garden. Maybe with a book in hand. Maybe with a pencil. 

Today, he was sitting amongst the sprawling green grounds alone, a magazine on the table before him. It was closed. As you approached you recognized the Rolling Stone font across the glossy page, looking up to find Eddie staring a hole through the cover. 

"You gotta turn the pages with your hands babe, won't open otherwise." You remarked, stepping through the grass to see Eddie grinning up at you. He was more despondent today than he had been your past few visits. He waited till you sat at his side, resting your head on his shoulder as an affectionate hello. 

"Apparently there is a pretty scathing write up about me in here. One of the first since I paused the band to come here." Eddie voiced, letting one of his big hands rest on your thigh. His rings were missing, and his other usual regalia too. The grey hoodie he wore suited him well, you thought, with his pulled back hair. He looked very clean, in every sense.

"You don't have to read it if you're not ready." You reminded, lifting your head to face the man at your side. He left his hand resting on your leg as he bit his lip and looked to you too. "Or I could read it to you?" 

Eddie shook his head.

"It's time I start facing some facts, ya know? Start doing the hard work of facing what I have to change now that I'm sober enough too." Eddie sighed. He'd spent the past few months getting well, letting his body and mind recover. The next step was to grow. To start molding himself into the version he came here seeking help to rebuild. It was time for the hard part. The part he never got to in rehab before.

"I messed a lot of shit up." Eddie nodded, letting his eyes fall away from yours. "I should have done a lot of things differently. Especially with you." 

"Babe, it's okay. You don't have to do this." You assured, reaching out to smooth your hand over his shoulder. You had never held anything that happened against him. 

"I know we both kind of got roped into a weird and shitty situation. But I could have handled it so much better. You deserved so much more respect than I gave you. And that last night. You never should have had to take care of me like that. I shouldn't have gone that far off the deep end," Eddie sighed, letting his eyes well with tears, sniffing them away as he apologized for it all. You brushed away a loose strand of his hair and shook your head. 

"S'okay, Eddie. We were both just taking those days as they came. We did what we thought we needed to, to get by. It's okay."

As you pulled the guy in for a hug, Eddie fell into your frame without hesitation, burying his head in your neck. You held him there for a moment muttering something about how proud you were that he was doing his best to be better.

"Can I tell you something, now?" You wondered, smoothing Eddies hair as he pulled away to lock his dark eyes with yours. He smiled, when he noticed you were already grinning. When he nodded, you drew in a breath and said,

"I asked Brooke to book me a trip to Hawaii. You know how stressful the past few months have been. Hell, the past year." You began. Eddie nodded along. "She found that same little place we stayed in for our honeymoon." You rose your fingers to curl into air quotes around the last word of  your sentence. Eddie huffed a laugh before speaking up. 

"You loved it there. So did I. So you're staying there again?" Eddie beamed. So did you. 

"It was no longer available to rent." You revealed, watching Eddie's brow furrow. "Because it was for sale. So I bought it. And I'm moving there. Like now. Like after I leave here." Your smile was so wide it nearly ached your cheeks. Eddie was shocked, brows shooting up, mouth hanging open, palms held out before you. You took his hands and nodded to assure you weren't fibbing. 

"Oh my God." Eddie gasped. "This is perfect. I'm so happy for you." He wrapped you in another embrace, planting his lips to your cheek as you started yammering about plans to paint and furniture to buy and an open door policy Eddie was allowed to mind at all times. Eddie watched as you rambled, his grin flattening a little, until his lips were bitten together and his brows pushed togeteher. 

"What is it..." You stopped listing plans and straightened your posture to watch as Eddie sucked in a deep breath. Seeming to choose his words, you tried to remain patient, ignoring the pit in your stomach threatening to grow.

"I can't have you read me this Rolling Stone article because I need to do it on my own." Eddie spoke decidedly. "I can't come visit you in Hawaii. I can't-" Eddie shuddered a breath. "I know we aren't really together. But I need to be really alone, for a while. I need to deal with my own shit, ya know?" Eddie's voice shook as he explained himself, bouncing his knee and moving his eyes from yours to his lap. The void in your stomach widened exponentially. 

You wanted to argue back, remind him what he said the night you slept together last. How he said he wanted to be with you. But you couldn't be so selfish. You unfortunately understood where he was coming from. You swallowed your despair and nodded.

"Okay. Yeah, I understand Ed."

"I'm sorry. I lo-" Eddie blinked up to the sky and shook his head. "I'm sorry."

A moment of heavy silence swirled between you, as you made the hard choice to be okay with this, at least in the moment. Then you looked up with a grimace of a smile. 

"Can I still write to you? I'd like to still write to you." You declared, watching Eddie work to find composure. 

"I'd like that too." He breathed, forcing a smile. "I'm still happy for you." He assured, his voice thick with emotion. 

"And I'm still proud of you." You smiled, and you meant it.

///

Hawaii 1987 -

Another holiday season was fast approaching. And this year you had every opportunity to celebrate. You bought a little faux tree and put it by the fireplace. You decorated the big kitchen windows with garland and let Christmas vinyl's spin from the record player in the guest room. 

The little Hawaiian home was clean and cozy and decorated just the way you liked. Since moving in, fresh paint brightened the walls. Old familiar photos hung there too. A few miscellaneous tour posters and three platinum records the only memorabilia you held on to from the past four years.

On the kitchen counter was an offer from your record label you were still mulling over. The year off and away from Hollywood was a refreshing and much needed break for your sanity. Creativity seemed to flow more freely all the while. You definitely had music in mind to record. You just weren't sure if you were ready.

You liked the life you had here. The mornings you spent milling about the markets down the block. The friends you made of your neighbors. The quiet. 

You missed your old life too, though. More than you thought you would have. You missed making music and singing for crowds. You missed dressing up and going out. The closest to a wild night out you had since moving here was when Brooke surprised you one summer weekend. She stayed at your insistence and took you to the finest restaurant on the Island and gossiped for two days and three nights straight. And when you asked about Eddie, she said he missed you. She said he kept your rarely exchanged letters on his coffee table. She said you should call him. But you couldn't. You wanted to respect his space. To allow him all the room he needed to grow into sobriety and into the new version of himself he was anxious to learn about.

But Brooke wouldn't answer when you asked if you should get back in the studio soon. She said only you could know the right answer to that question. So you mulled it over from then until now. Teetering closer to calling back your label every day, eager to agree to record something. 

And then it was Christmas time.

It would've felt lonely if you let it. But you'd worked too hard on finding hope in the dullness, this year. You worked too hard finding peace in the quiet, this year. You reminded yourself to relish the home you got to call your own. How you truly felt you belonged here. You marveled over how fate handed you these house keys. You smiled when you remembered how you'd come to fall in love here, in more ways than one. 

Then there was a knock at the door.

Mulling toward the front of your home, you expected a delivery or two. You'd ordered gifts for your neighbors this year, and some for yourself too of course. You were determined to have a happy fucking holiday.

But the man at your door was more of a gift than you'd asked for, this year. 

Eddie was there, grinning wide, wringing his hands. His hair was a little longer, the longest you'd ever seen it. His frame was toned, his face was full of warm color and his eyes were bright and clear. He was a vision. He was so damn beautiful.

"What's all this?" You smiled, letting a laugh of surprise escape your lips. 

"Surprise? I hope I'm not intruding." Eddie rose a hopeful brow, his dark deep eyes peering into yours for the first time in too damn long.

"Shut the fuck up and come inside you fool." You smiled and widened the doorway, stepping aside so Eddie could enter. Your heart hammered at the sight of him, your soul buzzed to life at the realization that he was here, he was really fucking here.

"Just like old times, aye?" Eddie grinned, letting his gaze float across the home he'd discovered with you, a year ago. 

"Hopefully not." You noted, crossing your fingers this visit led to a more positive and promising outcome than your last time together in this home. Eddie laughed and asked how you were liking it, complimenting the changes you'd made since last he saw.

You rambled for a bit about a particularly hard renovation and another story about how perfectly another came together. Then you asked if he was hungry. It was almost dinner time. 

Before you knew it, you were mixing up your famous pasta sauce to the tune of Eddie's story telling. He made you laugh so hard you cried, and nearly burnt yourself stumbling to catch your breath near the oven. He ate your dinner with gratitude and answered your questions about how his life had been going. Eddie spoke about a tiny apartment and a sparse kitchen and an empty schedule. Eddie admitted it had been hard, but that he was finally in a place he felt he had control over. Eddie helped you clean up and let you make some hot cocoa's because it was the damn season.

You led Eddie to the living room, warm mugs in hand, rambling back and forth about the year you'd spent apart. You spoke about making new friends and considering calling your label back. You mentioned how much you missed him, like a lot.

"You're not mad I'm here?" Eddie cautioned, setting his mug on the coffee table and turning to face you. He rested an elbow on the back of the sofa and his head in his hand.

"Why would I be mad, Eddie?" Your mind boggled, unable to consider feeling anything besides unbridled glee at the mere thought of the man's presence.

"Because last time I saw you, I said I couldn't come here. And now I've just invited myself over all of a sudden. I'll understand if-"

"No, I'm not mad. I didn't think you'd never show up. Maybe that's the hopeless romantic in me." You shrugged, smiled and dipped your chin toward your shoulder, trying to hide your embarrassed blush.

"Romanic, eh?" 

"I never stopped loving you, Eddie." Your voice was a whisper. Eddies eyes burned into yours. His gaze was full of desire you recalled rising up in him before. His gaze was full of adoration you remembered him expressing. His dark chestnut gaze was familiar and warm and so nice to stare back into after too damn long.

"Okay I'm gonna say something, then. You can kick me out after this. But I'm gonna say it, okay?" Eddie seemed to decide. 

"O-okay."

"In rehab I did a lot of thinking about the past. What I fucked up. What I lost. But when I got out, I started to realize I had forever in front of me. And there was so much I still had the opportunity to fix and change. And I realized there was no version of forever I want to spend without you. I know this is like... the third time we've come to this crossroad but..." 

Suddenly Eddie was sliding off the sofa and kneeling before you on one knee. Suddenly, he was reaching in his pocket. Suddenly you were staring at a ring. The stone was tigers eye and the band was gold. It was what you tried to pick out all that time ago.

"I'm a mess." Eddie proclaimed "I cannot promise to make your life better. but I can promise I want to be a part of your life. I want to marry you. Actually this time."

"For real?" You gasped a chuckle, sniffing away the spring of tears that clouded your vision from focusing on every little detail of this perfect fucking moment.

"Very much for real. No contracts. No reason besides the fact that I love you." 

You were nodding, holding out your left hand and struggling to suck in a breath before you could say yes a dozen times in a row. The space in your stomach where despair often bloomed was now only full of hope and assurance and calm. The space on your finger that had been left bare since your tossed that ugly diamond ring into the ocean was now perfectly fitted with the jewel of your dreams. The space in front of you was now taken up by Eddie. And he was finally all yours.

///

New York 1988-

"So after Kelsey went to prison and Eddie got out of rehab and moved to Hawaii with me, we got lawfully married, got a dog, helped each other rediscover music."

"The release of your new album suggests you and Eddie are a duo now. Do either of you plan on making solo records again?"

"I don't." Eddie chimed in, finally settling at your side in the booth with a fresh soda in hand. "I'm too unhinged without her around. Plus, she clearly makes music better. It's because of her touch we won album of the year. We probably lost to Paul Simon in 86' because there was too much of my misguided influence on Steel and Stone." Eddie laughed and you shook your head. 

"Don't discredit yourself."

"Will there be a coin toss to decide who gets to keep the Grammy?" Rolling Stone chuckled.

"We'll probably keep it on the mantel where we both can see."

After that interview ended, Brooke picked you both up from the lounge and let you stay in her loft until your flight back to the Island was due the next morning. You didn't wake her when the both of you got up and snuck off. But you left a letter on her counter, explaining that she deserved an award for putting up with the pair of you after all this time. So, you left the Grammy on her counter too. ///

Hawaii 1990- You opened the front door with one hand and balanced a bag of produce with the other. The man at that bodega at the edge of town was still selling veggies from his garden. Even though he walked with a cane now he'd manage his way to sell you produce for half price every weekend. 

You breezed through your home, toward the kitchen where you rested your bags on the counter next to a radio that had been left on. Right on cue, Eddie made his way in from out back, dripping ocean water on the rug you put down to protect the hardwood floors. 

"Wanna come out there with me while the waves are still calm?" He wondered, finding a towel and kissing your cheek as a morning greeting. You'd been brave enough recently to wade in the water a little deeper than ever before, with Eddie at your side, and only when the tide was calm. 

"I'm making breakfast now," You waved off your husbands offer, catching a glimpse of your tiger eye ring in the sun rays through the window curtains.

"Then I'll help." Eddie smiled, stealing the tomatoes you were in the process of washing clean. He took the food to begin prepping and turned up the radio on his way, a song you'd both written played. You watched as Eddie helped make your meal and listened as he sang to you and thanked God for the music that made it possible for your paths to cross and connect together. 

What you might write next together was just as an exciting thought as what the pair of you might watch on the telly later. Life was easy to find love within when Eddie really clearly loved the hell out of you. This house felt like a home with him in it. Eddie was finally home... and so were you.

///

[thatfandomslut]

Project Flowers

Gretchen Wieners x Reader

Word Count: 3k - I got very carried away with this one.

Trigger Warnings: insecurity, explicit language, tooth-rotting fluff

Request:

Hello, there! Do you write for Mean Girls? If so, I would like to request a Gretchen Wieners x reader fluff, please? Reader is new to school and has four brothers---the oldest used to date Regina. Regina and the brother, seeing Gretchen's growing crush on the reader, decides to play match-maker. One night, Regina convinces the reader to go with her to a "hang-out" where Gretchen is waiting with flowers.

Mean Girls requests are open.

"North Shore High is all about their cliques, which is why you're so lucky to have us." Lucas pulled on his varsity jacket, fixing his hair in the reflection of his car window. The action made (Y/n) roll her eyes with crossed arms as Michael slung his bag around his shoulders, nodding in agreement. As much as (Y/n) loved her brothers and begged to be able to attend public school, she was being reminded of how conceited and full of themselves her brothers truly were. It was the most amazing but unfortunate experience to have four older brothers while joining a new school where they were high on the social pyramid. "You will have to do a sport though. Maybe you'd like track?"

Daniel gently clapped his back to shut him up before gesturing towards the school. "Ready for your first day, (Y/n)? Sophomore year isn't all that bad. Plus, you're in AP English with James, so you'll at least have someone you know for a period." Daniel offered some comfort. He was the kinder of the four, Lucas being the more narcissistic of them. But she loved them all equally. "I think we all have to same lunch, too. So, hopefully, we'll see you then. Come on, guys, let's leave her be. Let's let her get some experience with normal school and get off her back." He tried to lead her brothers away.

"Don't talk to any of the horny douchebag boys here!" Called out Michael, pointing at her. Some passersby glanced her way, but she shrugged it off. She wasn't planning on talking to any boy if she could help it. If there was anything that her all-girls private school taught her, it was that girls were so much better. Still, she took heed of Michael's warning and attempted to steer clear of all of the boys who looked her over like she was a prize to be one throughout the hallway. Instead, she saw a different familiar face.

Regina George looked just as beautiful as she did when she last saw her. She had powerful red, pouty lips with eyeliner so sharp, it could cut someone. "(Y/n)," her voice cut through the hall, sounding more like a question as everyone stopped to see who she was talking to. Regina was never mean to her, and Regina's breakup with Lucas didn't end messy. Maybe that was because it was a summer fling, though. "I thought you went to North Shore All-Girls Academy?" She approached, two girls following her. One of the girls had dark brown hair with chocolate-colored eyes that had no thought behind them. The other girl, however; caused her breath to hitch in the back of her throat as she made eye contact with her. She had honey-blonde hair that fell in ringlets at the bottom of her hair, and her eyes were a soft amber.

"I wanted to come here with my brothers. It was a regretful idea saying as they want me to hang out with them during lunch." She hummed, a playful smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. Regina wasn't one to hug anyone, so when she hugged (Y/n), everyone was caught off guard. (Y/n) hugged back happily as she allowed the blonde to give her a gentle squeeze pulling away. The other two girls behind Regina stared at her due to how out-of-character Regina was being. However, neither of them said nothing. "Plus, since Lucas was too dumb, I don't get to see you as much."

Regina flipped her blonde hair over her shoulder as she began leading (Y/n) and the other girls away from the ogling crowd. (Y/n) was in a state of awe at how popular Regina seemed to be. It threw her off guard in a way. "This is Karen Shetty and Gretchen Wieners," she introduced the two, grabbing the schedule from (Y/n)'s hand. She seemed to be showing her where to go, so (Y/n) didn't protest the snatch. "And don't worry about spending your lunch with your brothers, you can eat with us. This is your homeroom. Your next class is upstairs, turn right, third door." Regina said simply, passing the schedule back before stopping at a classroom. (Y/n) thanked her before entering the class, many other sophomores staring widely at her. She didn't understand why, still not getting the gravity that hanging out with Regina held on the student body.

Around lunchtime, (Y/n) wandered the halls, and headed towards the cafeteria. It wasn't too hard to find. There were too many signs indicating where it was. Before she could enter, Regina, Gretchen, and Karen found her first. "Hello, (Y/n)," Gretchen waved, smiling brightly. The smile caused a slight flutter in (Y/n)'s chest, heat rising to her ears as she waved back. Normally, Regina would comment on not having the first word, but she noticed how flustered both Gretchen and (Y/n) were acting with each other. So, she said nothing as they went to the lunch line. "So, the rules are, you can't wear a tank top two days in a row, you can only wear a ponytail once a week, jeans and track pants can only be worn on Fridays, and on Wednesdays we wear pink. You have to follow these rules, or you're not allowed to sit with us." Gretchen told (Y/n) as she sat beside her. (Y/n) nodded at her words, Regina still eyeing them closely.

"I got you, then. Those rules aren't too hard to follow. Maybe I can get your number so you can remind me to wear pink on Wednesday?" (Y/n) asked, causing Gretchen to clumsily pull out her phone so they could exchange numbers. Regina smirked slightly, realizing how smooth it was (Y/n). After all, she had Regina's number, she could always have asked her to remind her. She had a feeling by all of Gretchen's questions on the way to homeroom, that it was because the girl was interested in her ex's little sister. "Thanks, I'll just text you tonight to make sure I got the rules down, if you don't mind."

Gretchen shook her head kindly, hoping her hair could hide the blush forming on her cheeks. At this final display, Regina stood up, causing Karen, Gretchen, and (Y/n) to look her way. "I'm going to go get cheese fries." She excused herself before finding Lucas and pulling him into the lunch line with her. "Your sister is flirting with my friend," Regina said, causing Lucas's eyes to practically bulge out of his head as he stared at her for a long moment. "I think they'd be cute together. You're going to help me get them together by Spring Fling, at least." Regina stated, and Lucas could only nod. He knew not to defy Regina, he was smarter than that. And that is how Project Flowers commenced. It was an opportunity, that through time would help Gretchen and (Y/n) get together. Because Regina knew them both, and she knew that they were going to need help. Specifically, they needed Regina's help.

Regina allowed herself a few of weeks in order to let the two develop their relationship as friends before dropping hints to the girls that they liked each other, or she would mention different outfits she knew the other would like. "You know Gretchen, that one crop top you wore to the mall when we took Cady shopping, I overheard (Y/n) telling Karen how good you looked in it." Regina would say as she talked to Gretchen. "(Y/n), Gretchen absolutely adores your smile." She would say to (Y/n). But she was getting relentless with the responses of 'Are you sure?' Of course, she was sure. She was never wrong about anything, and she was not wrong about their feelings. Lucas also played his part, telling Gretchen little things that (Y/n) enjoyed. He would also tell (Y/n) about how he and Regina were talking about things Gretchen liked. Which always confused (Y/n) on why they brought Gretchen up, but she ignored this fact and got everything that was mentioned for Gretchen.

She was getting annoyed at all the gushing and blushing that (Y/n) and Gretchen did with each other. Their inadvertent flirting and their obliviousness killed Regina. It almost made her want to throw up in annoyance. But what was worse was the fact that they would do little things, like touch the other's hand, and then they'd pull away from each other quickly. It made Regina want to take their hands and force their fingers to intertwine together. She never thought she'd care about a relationship other then her own until she saw how disgusting in love her friends were getting for each other.

"Here's the plan, Lucas, listen up. I know you have trouble listening, so please put your listening ears on." Regina spoke to him like a child, but he didn't mind. Instead, he just listened to the blonde as he sat at a desk in the empty classroom they were in. Shane was trailing after Regina like a lost puppy but had no clue what was going on. "Tonight, I'm going to talk to Gretchen, and you need to talk to (Y/n). Then, I am going to ask her to hang out, but I am not going to be there. It's going to be Gretchen. Understood? So, somehow find out what kind of flowers she likes. For Gretchen, of course."

Lucas nodded briefly, stuffing his hands in his pockets. Glancing over at Shane, he raised his brows momentarily. "Okay, sounds good." He stood up, getting ready to leave. After all, he was his siblings' ride, and they would get suspicious if he was any later to leave for the car. Still, he stopped before exiting. "Hey, Regina… You doing this for Gretchen and (Y/n)… It's nice to see you have a heart. But, also, just so you know, you deserve love, too. You and I both know Aaron and Shane are phases. Sorry, Shane." Regina narrowed her eyes at him as he smirked playfully before leaving. He knew she could kill him with that stare. However, he knew that Regina deserved love, too, and he saw the way she looked at Cady.

"Where were you?" (Y/n) questioned, still leaning on the car. Her question was directed at Lucas, but her eyes were on Gretchen talking animatedly to Karen in the distance. The ghost of a smile played on her lips and Daniel nudged her shoulder to let her know they were piling in. Since she was the shortest, she was required to sit in the middle so Lucas could see out of the back windshield. Forgetting her question, and forgetting that it never got answered, she got in. A small part of her wanted to look back at Gretchen, but she forced herself to get in and ignore that feeling of want that settled in the pit of her stomach. Especially because she knew Gretchen would never like her that way. Still, she got out her phone to send a quick text to the girl.

As they drove, Lucas looked back at (Y/n) using the mirror, who was still texting. The smile on her face let him know who she was talking to. Then, he remembered he needed to know her favorite flower. The good thing was that (Y/n) was in the social reject group of band nerds. How Regina ever let that slide was beyond Lucas. However, she had a concert that weekend and it was the perfect excuse to ask her what flowers she would like. "Hey, (Y/n), for your band concert this weekend," he got her attention, her eyes flickering up to look at him, even if his eyes were currently on the road. "What kind of flowers would you like us to bring you?" He inquired, delivering a quick glance before looking back at the road.

All of the boys, excluding Lucas, were now looking at (Y/n)- they were very supportive. Still, all of the eyes on her made her nervous. "Well, it's going to sound basic, but my favorite flowers are pink roses. So, I guess, if you all were to bring flowers, I would want those." She answered, hoping this would get their attention off of her. For one of the Plastics, she didn't like all of the attention. Not even from family. But that probably came with being the youngest girl in a family of four older brothers. There was constantly so much attention on her, that it was sometimes suffocating. With that said, when it came to Gretchen's attention, she wanted it. She wanted Gretchen to look at her. She loved it when Gretchen smiled at her. It was like she was Ken in the new Barbie movie.

A text pinged on her phone and she looked down, hoping it was from Gretchen, but instead, she saw it was from Regina. 'Hey, loser <3, meet me at the park at 7,' it read. Typing a quick confirmation, she got ready but before she could, she was stopped by Lucas who had a suspiciously caring smile on her face. She knew a big talk was coming and she dreaded getting elder brother advice from Lucas of all her older brothers.

"I just wanted to talk to you about Gretchen. I know, because I see how you look at her, and how you look at yourself, that you don't feel good enough." He said, causing surprise to grow on her face. How he knew how she was feeling was beyond her. But maybe she sold him out short. Maybe he did pay attention to more than just himself. "You are good enough for Gretchen. You are so kind and caring, (Y/n). And I can see it in Gretchen's face that she sees that in you. You need to go for it. You've got this."

A smile fell on her face as she embraced her brother. "Thank you," she whispered as he hugged back. He left her room as she changed into something more comfortable but still within Plastics standards. As she got ready for the park, she texted Gretchen and asked if she'd be at the park, too. After waiting a few moments, she tried not to pout at the lack of response before grabbing a jacket and making her way over to meet Regina. Maybe it was just a hangout with only Regina. She felt guilty all of a sudden, hoping she didn't make Gretchen feel left out. Then the overthinking came in, and she wondered if she should even go. On the other hand, Regina would be pissed if she didn't make it. Even if she was kinder to (Y/n) than most people, it didn't make her immune to Regina's quips now and again.

Making her way through the park, she was surprised to see Gretchen at the tree. Squinting slightly, (Y/n) could see that she was holding something. Looking around, she noticed that there was no sign of Regina, so she decided to make her way over. "Hey, Gretchen," she greeted, startling the honey-blonde girl. She finally noticed that in Gretchen's hands were her favorite flowers, and she was starting to realize what was going on. She was tricked into coming here to meet Gretchen by Regina and her brother. Her brother wasn't asking about the rose for the concert- though her brothers would still get her flowers. And Regina staged the hangout, and she must've convinced Gretchen to come out here.

"(Y/n), hey! I was waiting for you." Gretchen bit her lip nervously, extending the roses over to (Y/n). (Y/n) blinked before smiling slowly. Looking up at Gretchen with a wide smile, she started to see the confidence starting to circulate in her amber eyes. "I've been wanting to talk to you about something. So, Regina told me to meet you here and to tell you. So I'm going to go for it." Gretchen gave herself a moment, breathing in. (Y/n) wanted to kiss her right then and there, but she also wanted to hear what she wanted to say. "I really like you. You are so caring and kind. You're funny, smart, and creative. You mean everything to me, and I really want to go on a date with you. We could get coffee or boba together. But also, I really want to be your girlfriend."

(Y/n) gently took a step forward, and with one hand (the other was still clutching the flowers), she pulled Gretchen in. The two girls looked at each other for a moment before Gretchen nodded and (Y/n) completed the distance between them. Kissing her deeply, she felt Gretchen's hands cup the back of her neck. Everything felt complete, and (Y/n) had to stop smiling in the kiss. "I really want to be your girlfriend, too, Gretchen." (Y/n) whispered on her lips, causing Gretchen to kiss her again happily.

"About time," Regina said with her arms crossed, standing next to Lucas, who was looking away respectfully. He obviously didn't want to intrude on his little sister's first kiss. "I thought by the time you two got the balls to ask each other out, we'd be in an elderly home," Regina stated with a quick wink, the other two girls red in the face. "I hope you two have a good time at your picnic. Never say I didn't do something for you. Lucas, the basket, let's go."

The words confused the girls until they noticed Lucas holding the picnic basket in his hands, passing it to his sister. (Y/n) smiled shyly, thanking him before Regina and Lucas went their separate ways. Gretchen and (Y/n) laughed for a moment before going through the basket to find a mix of their favorite snacks. Setting up the area, the two stayed out until the night fell, creating their constellation, their hands connecting them like stars in the night sky, (Y/n) looked over at Gretchen, smiling when she turned over, too. (Y/n) noted in her mind that Gretchen was prettier than all the stars before placing a gentle kiss on Gretchen's lips, Gretchen reciprocating gently. Nothing could ever ruin this moment, (Y/n) decided as she pulled away, smiling widely at the girl. Gretchen turned her head once more and (Y/n) did, too, as they continued to stargaze.

[thealtoduck]

My Jolly Sailor Bold

Sam Winchester x Male Reader

Content: Old Timey Sailor AU? (Idk what to call it)

Warnings: Smut, Bottom!Reader, Top!Sam, age gap reader is 18 and Sam is 25, loss of virginity, anal sex, unprotected sex, fingering, spit as lube, missionary position…

Summary: During a walk you meet eyes with a handsome sailor and there is an instant connection…

(A/n: Honestly i’ve only seen like 6 episodes of Supernatural… like 2 years ago, so Sam might be very out of character… just so you know)

——

Your father was a merchant, a merchant who traveled and transported all sorts of goods across the sea to sell and bring home the money to his family. He had taken three of his sons to act as part of the crew of his ship only leaving the 2nd oldest and the youngest sons behind in their hometown.

He left Remus, the second oldest, in charge to take care of business and to care for his wife/Remus mother and the youngest son. And the youngest son is you Y/n L/n…

One summers morning you were walking through the shipping port, you had just seen off your father and your older brothers, they were going on another voyage on the dangerous ocean. Your mother had been crying seeing them leave again, as soon as they boarded she had gotten down on her knees praying for their safe return.

Your older brother Remus decided to escort her home, so he could comfort her over a cup of tea and some biscuits. But you wanted to see the ship leave port and decided to stay a bit longer.

As you walked you watched the different people, some were saying goodbye to loved ones as they were about board the ships, others were unloading the wares from far off places and even some kids just looking for a good spot to fish.

Then your eyes fell on a man, presumably a sailor, he had a very handsome face, he was looking out to the sea. The sailor’s attention had drifted from the sea… and on to you. Your eyes met his as you walked past and it felt as if your heart was pierced by cupid himself when he looked at you. You felt you would get odd glances by the crowds if you continued looking at each other for too long, so you broke eye contact and kept walking.

Once you reached the edge of the pier you sat down on the edge, legs hanging over the water. A while later you saw your father’s ship drift out of port slowly. But you noticed something, the sailor you had seen before was standing portside gazing longingly back at the dock.

Back at you…

You smiled at him, he smiled back.

You waved at him, he waved back.

Then another crew member seemed to call him over, he gave you one last smile and wave and then he turned around and left. And you watched as the ship traveled in to the distance before you left and went home.

A month later…

Your father’s ship should be returning today, so you, Remus and your mother once again traveled down to the port to greet your father and three brothers.

Though you weren’t only there for your father and brothers, their return would mean the unknown sailor would be returning along with them. Which meant you could finally meet him. The smile of the sailor had lingered in your head through the month there was something special about him.

Once you were at the pier you could see the merchant’s ship was approaching. As soon it had docked the gangway was lowered and the crew rushed off the ship to reunite with their loved ones.

Your father and three brothers stepped over the gangway together and greeted you, Remus and your mother lovingly. Your brothers immediately started telling you stories about the journey. But it was hard to keep up because all 3 of them were telling different stories at the same time.

Your father interrupted them saying ”Boys, boys, calm down there’s plenty of time for stories later”. He then turned to you, your mother and Remus and said ”First things first, we’ll have a guest for a couple of days, one of the sailors, he has no family or wife to go home to and i felt bad for the man, so i thought he could stay with us for a couple of days for some company”.

”See now where is he?” your father questioned looking around. ”Oh, there he is. Sam! Over here!” he called over the man. When you saw the sailor coming over it felt as if your breath was knocked out of your body.

It was the handsome sailor you had waved to when they left. He stopped in front of your family with a shy smile. ”This is Sam Winchester”. Your father introduced him first to your mother, then to Remus and lastly you.

”And this Sam, is my youngest son, Y/n” he introduced. You and Sam shook hands and you said ”It’s nice to meet you Mr Winchester”. ”Please, just Sam” he said with a nice smile. The eight of you then traveled back to your family home.

You spent the whole day listening to the never ending stories of your brothers adventures on the voyage. And it became a blessing when it was finally bedtime and you could finally escape them.

Though you couldn’t fall asleep that evening, it was just impossible. Your bed was either too warm or too cold, too soft or too hard, there was just no way to feel comfortable. You decided to get up and get a cup of tea and maybe read a bit.

Though when you walked down stairs in to the sitting room you were suprised to see Sam was up reading a book in candlelight. Sam looked towards you and said ”Oh sorry Y/n, did i wake you?”.

”No, don’t worry about it, i just couldn’t sleep” you explained and then questioned ”How about you?”. ”Couldn’t sleep either” he answered simply with a small smile. ”Would you like some tea?” you asked. ”I’d love some” Sam said.

You went in to the kitchen and lit some more candles for light and then started making some tea. You went back in the sitting room with a tea tray and sat down on the couch beside him.

You tried to think of conversation topics but Sam spoke up first saying ”You know, i remember you from the day the ship left, you were the only one who really saw me off and i wanted to thank you, it meant a lot, it kept me going on the raging sea as if i had someone to come back too”.

You smiled brightly at him. ”That means a lot to hear, i actually thought a lot about you, you seemed so mysterious… so i wondered who you were, what your name was and if i’d ever see you again” you told him, a warm look forming on his face.

”What were you reading?” you then asked looking at the book Sam had been reading. Sam looked at the book and said ”It’s an old tale about a sailor and what he sees during his travels, and at one point he believes he sees people of the sea, mermaids and mermen, he describes them as beautiful and graceful, pure of the sins of man and who’s echoing voices sounds like touching the softest silk”.

”In fact everytime i pictured them all i saw was you waving from that dock, from the way they’re described all i could see was your face” Sam revealed looking deeply in to your eyes. You were at a loss of words. Sam then caught himself saying ”Sorry, got a little-” he tried but you cut him off saying curiously ”Read me a passage, about the sea people”.

Sam smiled picking up the book, flipping a couple pages and read to you ”While passing the foreign lands, sitting on a rock close to the shore sat a young man of otherworldly beauty, the man was bare, his wet skin glistening in the sun. There was an ethereal esscense to him as he waved politely towards me”.

Sam moved closer to you as he countinued reading ”The man looked carefree and untouched by the sins of men, he was glowing as if he was untainted, sent from heaven. It made me want to get closer and touch him, to feel if his skin felt the same as mine, to feel his body pressed to mine to see if he remains as immaculate as when i first saw him”.

Sam finished and looked up from the book at you, meeting your gaze. He had put the book aside and put his hand on the side of your face, stroking it softly. ”That was beautiful” you said in an amazed whisper. ”I know, I was the one who wrote it… I wrote it about you” Sam said and pushed his lips to yours.

You had never been kissed before but Sam’s soft lips guided you. He took your hand in his squeezing it lightly. He then pulled away from the kiss saying ”Come with me” and he started leading you towards the guest room. He lead you inside and closed the door behind the two of you.

He then pulled you back in to a kiss, his arms around your waist pulling you closer to him, your clothed bodies pressed together. Sam led you to the bed making you sit down on it. ”Have you ever done something like this?” he asked in a kind tone.

You shook your head shyly. ”Do you want me to show you?” he asked, his hand lifting you chin ever so slightly. ”Yes” you told him. He then made you stand up again and started slowly undressing you.

You felt aroused as Sam lastly pulled off your night shirt leaving you naked in front of him. He looked you up and down as he stroked your hip trailing his fingers over your soft skin. ”You’re heavenly” he said feeling your body in his hands.

He then started undressing himself until he was fully unclothed too. ”Touch me” Sam instructed and guided your hand to his chiseled chest. You stroked his chest down to his to his belly button. He then took you hand and led it even lower, putting your hand on his manhood.

He squeezed his hand around yours making you stroke his manhood. ”Feel that, that’s what you do to me” he told you. He then led you back to the bed and made you lay down softly on your back and then layed down next to you and once kissing you.

He pulled back from you’re lips. ”You’re so pure, it makes me want to shelter you from all the evils of the world… but it also makes me want to be the one to stain your innocence and make you mine” he said letting his hands drift down to your crotch. His fingers grazing against your length making you let out soft excited moans.

”Make me yours” you told him as you took his hand and pressed it against your crotch. Sam gave you a light smile and moved from your side to towards the foot of the bed, he grabbed your ankles and parted them, speading your legs.

He then moved himself inbetween them, he leaned towards you and said ”Open your mouth”. You did as told and Sam put his middle and index finger in your mouth making you suck on them.

He then pulled them out and brought them to your untouched enterance trailing over it lightly. He then asked ”Ready?”, you nodded. Then you felt the strange feeling as his wet index finger started pushing in to you.

You gasped at the new feeling as he used his finger to pentrate you. It hurt a bit at first as he pushed in but then you started adjusting to him. Soon enough Sam pushed in his middle finger, streching you out even more, as that pain soon turned to pleasure Sam pulled out his fingers.

He then spit in his hand rubbed it over his manhood. Sam once more held your legs spread as he lined himself up with your enterance. He whispered gently ”Ready sweetheart?”. ”Yes” you answered and Sam slowly started pushing himself in to your tight virgin hole.

You threw your head back as you felt his thick length enter you, Sam covered your mouth as to not wake up your parents and have them find him deflowering their youngest son. ”Fuck” Sam swore as he felt your hole clench around his cock as it slowly sunk in to you.

Sam continued pushing all the way until his manhood was planted in you. ”You’re doing so well” Sam praised as he watched you breath deeply as you slowly adjusted to his size. Soon he noticed your pain was turning in to bliss. ”Sam” you moaned deeply.

Once your pained features had turned to ones pleasure Sam slowly started rolling his hips carefully, pushing his length in and out of you as gently as he could. Your arms were wrapped Sam’s back as the foreign sensation of his cock made you uncontrollably moan.

Sam placed kisses along your collarbone as his cock was kneaded by your warmth. ”You’re so beautiful” Sam told the virgin boy beneath him as he watched him be defiled by his manhood, it was a once in a lifetime sight.

Sweat started forming between the two of you and to Sam you looked just like described in his book, your damp skin really was glistening from the moonlight that entered the room. Sam started rolling his hips faster making you wrap your legs around his body.

The two of you had become a wet tangeled mess as Sam thrusted gently in to your ass giving you a sense of euphoria as he hit your prostate, giving you a feeling you could only ever dream off.

”Sam” you moaned as you felt a sudden new feeling as if you were about to erupt. Then your hard cock started shooting cum all over yours and Sam’s abdomens. This made Sam go feral and he shoved his face in the crook of your neck, planting deep kisses as he moaned.

His thrusts became rougher as he searched for his own release while saying animalistically ”I’m gonna fill you with my cum”. And with a last roll of his hip, his cock pushed deep inside you, he burst, filling you up with his seed. He then slowly pulled out of you, sitting on his kness between your legs.

He looked down on the beautiful young man he had deflowered, leaving him leaking with his load. Sam felt proud of himself. He laid down next to you with a gentle smile and said ”You were amazing” and planted a kiss on your lips.

You were close to falling asleep as you were all tuckered out from the experinence. Sam went and got up and got a rag to clean you up with, once he finished he helped you back in to your sleep wear. Then he carried you to your room putting you in bed saying ”Goodnight, beautiful” kissing your cheek one last time before you fell asleep.

Sam went back down to the sitting room and got his book, taking it back to the guest room placing it on the writing table, the next day he would write another chapter in it.