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eggcount · 9 months

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Who is Jessie Anyway!!?!?!?

January 9, 2024

So, on Saturday I got Covid. (I'm no longer a unicorn - so sad and so much for Gale's theory that the Gorcey genes are somehow protecting us. And I got it magically from Toby who is in St. Paul and I haven't seen since Thanksgiving. I don't know how that happened, but it's true. Here's how I know. Toby got Covid from his in-laws over Christmas. His symptoms were that he had a huge headache and was super tired. Being the father of at least one child who doesn't sleep through the night, he didn't give it much thought. But then, his mother-in-law tested positive, so he decided to test and yikes - there was the little purple line! So, on Saturday, I was dead tired, like "will someone put that baby to bed" tired, almost-face-planting-in-my-dinner tired. And it just popped in my head - I have Covid. Dave said "no you don't", I said "yes I do", Dave said "impossible", I said "I'm testing" and yep - I have Covid and Toby gave it to me. That's my story. If not for Toby, I would just be sick and not in quarantine for 5 days. And I would still be a Covid unicorn. oh well. What can you say, that's the risks of having children.) (btw, the true story of where I got it is from Dave, who also has Covid, but didn't think he did, so he didn't test when he got sick last week. It's his second annual New Year's Covid. He probably picked it up on New Year’s Eve at the Seldom Scene concert. He's out of the quarantine period and didn't get the Paxlovid because he passed the 5 days onset of symptoms when I got Covid and he got tested.)

But this is a big digression - the point is that I'm not quite well enough to do anything, despite the Paxlovid, but that's your gain. I can write Egg Counts!!! Everyone wins. I get to write Egg Counts, you get to read them. I'm a little less bored and you are hopefully a little entertained. I'm sure everyone is shivering with delight!

Back to the topic - who is Jessie anyway!!?!?

We lost a lot of chickens in 2022. And ended up getting four new ones in October 2022. Jessie was one of those girls. But before we get to that, I really need to catch you up on the year before we got Jessie. Fortunately, I still communicated with my kids about the chickens on WhatsApp and WhatsApp, as Maurie just informed me, is searchable. So, I have a lot of information - dates and even pictures! Get ready to be updated!

Of most interest to everyone will be Henrietta’s brush with death at the beginning of 2022 – dramatically called “Henrietta gets bumblefoot, nearly dies, but is ok now” or “How Greta brought Henrietta back to life.” Henrietta’s name should be familiar to everyone. She’s, well, she’s of blessed memory now, but back in January 2022, she was the last of the hand raised chicks that we got in April 2014. And she had bumblefoot which is horrible staph infections on the bottom of the foot which causes the hen to limp. You have to cut them out. Good thing for us, Greta is a pro at bumblefoot surgery. And also, Carolyn Preyer, our neighbor and vet, is OK at bumble surgery. But not so good a thing for us, is that we were leaving for St. Paul to attend a Kathan Clan gathering for Alice’s birthday leaving Andre to watch the chickens so the surgery had to be done NOW. We booked Greta with Carolyn coming over later to help if Greta had problems. (She also brought a lot of vet tape!). After a nice soak in the downstairs sink, the bumble was taken care of, but Henrietta was not ok. In fact, she was really not ok. Carolyn did an inspection, and discovered a giant puncture wound. It looks like she might have been attacked by a fox and now the wound was infected. Honestly, we all thought she would die She was that not ok.

Here’s the problem. We were leaving the next day. If she died that night, that would be sad, but ok. If she didn’t die that night, she would need nursing for the bumblefoot and for the wound. Daily soaking, and bandage changing. Greta was willing to do this, but not willing to take her home to die. Carolyn, although she was 100% convinced that Henrietta would die, was not willing to “do the deed”, as she doesn’t know how to humanely end a chicken’s life. That was super important to her. In her opinion, Henrietta was very comfortable in a box and surely would pass peacefully in the next couple of hours. Her breathing was shallow, her eyes were glazed, and she just had that end-of-life look. Greta agreed to come back the next day to get her in the unlikely event that she lived. I agreed to stand vigil over her and make sure that her passing was peaceful. Dave agreed to bury her before we left. So, we had a plan.

As it turned out, Henrietta had her own plan and after a few hours of looking like it was “the time”, opened her eyes, lifted her head, assessed the situation - the warm house, clean box - and decided not to die. She gave a little peaceful coo, and went back to sleep. What a roller coaster of emotions. Instead of burying her, she was off to Greta’s house for a week of healing. Greta set her up in the basement and hand fed her until she was strong enough to feed herself. Twice daily baths to soak the wounds were part of the prescribed treatment and Henrietta came to love floating around in the tub. Greta’s cats were jealous. We got daily updates and returned home to a glowing and ready to rule the roost Henrietta. I think she was a little disappointed not to have daily baths, but excited to see her sisters.

And now I am feeling better from the Covid, so you’ll have to wait for more updates!

btw, the huge hens are happy. They are not integrated into the flock yet, but follow us around and come when called. Daisy is a little skittish with Jessie, but she’s not even laying yet – still a pullet. I’m pretty sure when she comes into adulthood, she’ll realize that she could stomp all over Jessie and Jessie will – well, we’ll see how it goes. Annabelle has not had to engage Jessie again and takes good care of Daisy.

Love to everyone,

Sarah

#egg count

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indigo474 · 10 months

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Today's work load and other stuff

Today i basically had to just be there.. i didnt do much.. cleaned off my desk, caught up on emails. Drew gets on my very last nerve. Like dude.. focus on the mess you got going on in your department. one of my reps stops taking calls 5 minutes before shes due to log out. she also takes the most calls on my team and is a good worker.. but every time Drew works he focuses on her and her times.. i get an email with a screen shot saying remind me to discuss.. he bothers me. nothing i can do about it. I got fillers in my face and now my face hurts and its swollen and i can see why people over due it although its uncomfortable. Not something i ever thought i'd do.. but here i am. i feel like i live my karma every day. i was a shitty person.i understand why i acted the way i did.. as much as i can understand. I owe my kids an apology. sooner or later the truth comes out. who am i to say what people deserve or dont deserve. I think eventually the truth comes out and people have to face their own shit. who really knows. i do know i am looking forward to Thanksgiving in my new home. i'm looking forward to my first 5 k.. yikes.. i tried my best to run on the treadmill.. i didnt do too good. i have big feelings. about everything, all the time. at the same time, i don't really give a fuck about much. i do, but i dont. i don't understand why there isnt outrage over the fact that our food in genetically engineered and our water is poisoned. most people i come across have no sense of self awareness.. none. someone was telling me they got some sort of chicken that wasnt real chicken.. they saw something about it on the news.. everything is weird and i'm starting to think maybe i need to take a dose of mushrooms to process what is going on in the world. i don't even know what is going.. i haven't watched tv in 5 years so who knows what kind of crap is being pushed down peoples throats. I did see a Chris Christie for President commercial tonight at the gym. I despise the man. there is no way he will ever be President.. ever. why is he even wasting his time. enough of me and my big feelings.

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luminescentauthor · 4 years

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this is TOTALLY random but i’ve been procrastinating school and my inevitable death by homework by watching and reading jujutsu kaisen and i have two things to say:

One: it’s bloody fantastic, go watch it and/or read it. preferably both because the manga is amazing.

Two: I??? Have?? A desperate need for a fanfiction in which Sukuna accidentally fuckgin adopts Yuji and does not realize he’s accidentally done this for the longest-ass time bc he’s emotionally constipated, and then figures it out and goes “wAIT THAT’S MY BRAT THEY’RE TRYING TO KILL” and it basically goes:

Mahito: but he’s an annoying brat???

Sukuna: okay yes but have you considered: he’s my annoying brat and ur not allowed to kill him

Mahito: ...why?

Sukuna: Because I Said No.

Also consider:

Sukuna: oh wow what a dumbass kid

Sukuna:

Sukuna: WAIT that’s my dumbass kid-

Sukuna absolutely did not sign up for being an entire older brother/parental to a Whole Reckless Dumbass. He’s astoundingly grouchy about it. Gojou find it positively fucking hilarious, and frequently makes jokes about co-parenting Yuji with him. Sukuna is this close to trying to strangle him, but he is unfortunately still stuck in Yuji’s body. Nobara at one point makes a joke about her and Fushiguro’s grumpy uncle (read: Sukuna), and Gojou is very proud of her + laughing hysterically in the background while Sukuna groans in annoyance.

Bonus points if Gojou and Sukuna have the stupidest banter as co-parents!

Yikes this was supposed to be short. Whoops. A n y w a y if anyone knows about any fics with “grumpy reluctant parental who absolutely did not sign up to get emotionally attached to his vessel sukuna,” please do let me know because i need that! for - some reason. idk.

Fushiguro, dryly: you did it, Itadori. you accidentally domesticated the single most powerful curse in history by making him get sentimentally attached to you.

Sukuna: SHUT UP ALREADY-

Yuji, Gojou, and Nobara: *hysterical laughter*

Edit: note that i am FULLY aware that Sukuna is canonically batshit insane and a menace to humanity and Yuji’s sanity, but 40% of the reason i find this concept/AU hysterical is because of exactly that.

Edit 2: wow, I wasn’t expecting people to actually like my crazy braindump fanfiction idea! maybe if semester 2 is chiller than semester 1, I’ll write something for it...? Mostly plot with a healthy side of “very tired very much Yuuji’s older brother basically” Sukuna who will be getting his own body for shenanigans reasons (what do you mean I find the idea of him and Gojou having a petty prank war hysterical??? I have no idea what you’re talking about.) However with the ideas currently roaming in my head, I need to know if Best Girl is alive or dead before I can finalize any plot details. If she is, bringing her back via “oooo spooky magic sukuna voodoo” is gonna be a big element. If she isn’t, that’s obviously pointless. Anyway. Yeah! I’ve had my first day(s) off school work in months this Thanksgiving, so my brain is slowly rebooting.

#jujutsu kaisen #ryomen sukuna #sukuna #itadori yuji #fushiguro megumi #kugisaki nobara #gojou satoru

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sisterspooky1013 · 3 years

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Only One Choice, Part 2, Chapter 20

Read it here on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic

His apartment smells stale and dusty. His thrice weekly trips here to feed his fish are always quick and procedural; he hasn’t stopped to take in the state of the place in a while. A thick layer of dust covers most surfaces, his mattress is bare and there is no toilet paper in the bathroom. He sighs, frustrated and annoyed as he roots around in the closet for a set of sheets to make up the bed. He showers, remembering that his shower head is way too low for his tall frame, and misses Scully’s more luxurious setup.

He also, of course, misses Scully. He understands why she’s upset; he should have called, but the degree of her anger confuses him. When the X files reopened, he talked to her about the need to travel, and the potential for cases to disrupt their personal life. She said she understood, and they’ve worked through several hiccups already. So while he knew she’d be disappointed that he missed Thanksgiving and maybe even irritated at his lack of communication, he’d never anticipated being thrown out of her apartment.

He crawls into his bed, cold and lonely. They just both need a good night's sleep and this will blow over tomorrow, he’s sure. When he’s more well-rested, he’ll be able to explain, to help her understand.

In the morning, he feels a bit more clear-headed, but still decidedly off-balance; he needs to make things right with Scully. He packs up his things, feeds the fish, and drives back over to her apartment. He opens the door and finds the place quiet, the lights out. Something seems off, but he doesn’t immediately recognize what it is.

“Priscilla,” he calls, realizing that the cat hadn’t come to greet him at the door like she typically does.

He walks through to the bedroom, the bathroom, but there’s no sign of either of them. Back in the living room, he sees that the litter box is gone and his heart sinks. He goes back to the bedroom and throws open closets and drawers, checks the medicine cabinet. Scully’s overnight bag is gone, as is her toothbrush and the toiletries she uses daily. His heart starts racing, panic setting in at the idea that she’s left him, and taken his cat with her. This is worse than he’d initially thought, a lot worse.

He goes to the hallway and picks up the phone to try her cell, but it’s off. He tries her mother, who hasn’t spoken to her today. He tries Missy, who doesn’t answer. Not knowing what else to do, he calls Valerie.

“Hi, Will, good to hear from you,” she says, and he can hear the gurgle of her infant daughter in the background. Thankfully, he’d thought to call her a couple weeks ago and offer congratulations on her new arrival, so this phone call today won’t seem totally selfish.

“Hey, Val, I hope you and the baby are doing well,” he says, “I’m sorry to drop this on you, but I’m somewhat in need of advice.”

“Yikes, what’d you do?” she asks knowingly, and he hears her speak in hushed tones to her boyfriend as he takes the baby.

“I fucked up, Val. She’s gone,” he chokes out, tears constricting his throat.

Sitting heavily on the couch, he tells her about the X files reopening, about missing Thanksgiving, about Scully’s irrationally explosive reaction. She listens quietly, asking a few clarifying questions.

“I feel totally blindsided, Val. You and I were together when I was assigned to the X files before, and I had cases like this that took me away at odd times, but it wasn’t an issue. I don’t understand why it’s one now. I’m not sure which one of us is out of line here.”

“Wow, okay, where to start,” Valerie begins. “First of all, I think you’re both out of line. You are an epically huge asshole, Will, no question there, but taking your cat and disappearing is a bit much.”

He feels a pang of defensiveness for her saying something unflattering about Scully, but he pushes it down.

“Something else that strikes me,” she continues, “is your questionably accurate recollection of what our relationship was like when you were assigned to the X files.”

“What do you mean?” he asks, sitting up.

“Maybe I did a better job of hiding it than I thought, but I fucking hated that assignment, Will. I was relieved when it was shut down, but you were so upset I didn’t think it would be helpful for me to tell you as much at the time.”

“You hated it? Why? I always felt like you were supportive,” he asks, questioning his entire understanding of their relationship.

“I tried to be, but it sucked always coming second. I understood why it was so important to you in terms of trying to find out what happened to Samantha so I dealt with it, but it was kind of like the X files was the other woman in your life. I knew that if it came down to it and you had to choose, you’d choose her. It was really painful. I honestly think if they hadn’t been shut down, we probably would have broken up a lot sooner.”

He runs his free hand over his face. “Then what do I do? Quit the X files after I worked so hard to get them back? I haven’t felt this satisfied with work in years, I don’t want to have to do that.”

“I don’t think you need to quit, you just need to learn how to prioritize things differently. She needs to know she comes first.”

“That’s not how it works, Val, you know that. When a lead comes across my desk, I have to run it down. I have to go out, investigate. I have to find answers.”

“No, Will,” she says with a sympathetic sigh, “You don’t have to do that. You choose to. And you choose to do it at her expense. That’s exactly why she’s so upset. Even if in your mind it feels like you don’t have a choice, you do. That might mean missing out sometimes, passing on a case or not finding the answers. But you can’t have it both ways. You can put the X files first and be alone, or you can put her first and sometimes miss an opportunity to investigate the files.”

“Is it really that simple?” he asks flatly.

“It really is,” she answers. “The truth is, Will, that you may love those files, but they’ll never love you back. You’ll find yourself a lonely old man if you don’t get your priorities straight.”

He slumps down on the couch with a defeated sigh.

“Thanks, Val. I’m really grateful that I can talk to you about this,” he says earnestly.

“Happy to be of service,” she says lightly. “Let me tell you something else, Will,” she adds, “you better work this shit out before you have kids with her, because it gets twenty times harder.”

He chuffs a laugh, but the thought of having kids with Scully simultaneously makes him feel elated and terrified, because he’s not sure if he’s already messed it up too badly for that to be an option anymore.

———

She’s curled up on her side in the middle of Missy’s bed, Priscilla tucked against her belly and purring loudly.

Missy spends most of her time at John’s these days, so she offered her apartment as a place for Dana to crash, or hide out, or whatever it is that she’s doing. She’s honestly not sure, she just knows that she needs to be away from Mulder. To get space, to give it, to punish him, maybe all of those things. She wants him to hurt like she did, to not know where she is or when she’ll be back. She hopes that he fears she might be gone for good, though she knows she’s not. Taking Priscilla was just logical; having no idea when Mulder might come home she couldn’t very well leave her there to fend for herself. Knowing that it will add salt to the wound does give her some sick satisfaction, though.

The house phone rings and she lets it go, given that it’s not her apartment. The answering machine kicks on and Missy speaks to her as the message plays, telling her to pick up.

“Hello?” she answers, catching it just before Missy hangs up.

“Hey, Mulder is on his way over there,” Missy says breathlessly.

“What? Why?” she asks, not sure if she’s ready to see him.

“He showed up here, he’s been looking all over for you. He asked me if I knew where you were and I said no, but I’m a shitty liar, Sis.”

“Okay, I guess I have to talk to him sometime,” she answers, a sick feeling churning in her gut.

“Call me after, okay? Good luck.”

She relocates to the living room, not wanting this conversation to take place on Missy’s bed, and waits. The longer she waits, the more on edge she feels. When the knock finally comes, Priscilla startles and runs into the bathroom.

She stokes her own anger as she walks to the door, straightening her posture. She is mad, indignant, furious, ready to go into battle. That is, until she opens the door and sees his crumpled expression, his hooded eyes contrite and devastated. All the anger pours out through her heels, replaced by grief and fear. She feels her chin pucker, her nose burning as emotion wells in her throat.

“Scully,” he croaks out, and she steps forward, opening her arms to him. He folds against her like a rag doll, this big, strong man suddenly like putty. They make their way to the couch and he curls into her lap like a child, crying softly with a tortured grimace. She pets his hair, not offering any words of reassurance, but letting him know she’s there. He sits up a little, wrapping his arms around her rib cage and tucking his face into her neck.

“I’m so sorry,” he says in a harsh whisper, and her heart aches. She wants to forgive him, but sorry is not enough.

“I can’t live this way, Mulder,” she says against his shoulder, and he pulls back to look at her, not sure what she means. “I grew up watching my mother wait for my father to come home,” she explains. “Each time he didn’t write when he said he would, or call on a scheduled day, every time there was something about a navy ship in the news. We waited up, praying that he was okay, and it was torture. I swore that I would never put myself or my children in that position, and it’s a promise I intend to keep.”

His gaze drops away from her face and he nods sadly. “I didn’t understand, Scully, how to have both the X files and a relationship. I thought I was doing what had to be done, but I see now that I wasn’t putting you first, and I’m sorry. I’m going to do things differently, I promise. Please, give me another chance to get it right.”

He lifts his eyes to meet hers and she can see that he really means it, that he really understands. She nods, and he kisses her desperately; her lips, her cheeks, her ears, her hair. He kisses down her neck as he clings to her, his hands touching her back, her arms, her thighs.

“I was so scared, Scully,” he squeaks out between kisses. “I love you so much, and I was so afraid I ruined everything.”

He kisses the tears from her cheeks, finding her lips again as she grips the back of his neck, pushing her tongue into his mouth hungrily, needing him so much closer. He shifts to put his back against the couch, pulling her into his lap and gripping her hips, arching his pelvis up into her.

She’s overwhelmed with arousal, and love, and desperation. He pushes the hem of her shirt up and over her head, finding her braless, and sucks a nipple between his lips. She whimpers, slipping her hand down to rub her palm roughly over the bulge in his jeans and eliciting a deep moan from his throat. She stands suddenly, pulling down her cotton pants and panties, and he follows suit, standing just long enough to push his jeans and boxers down to his knees, sitting again as she climbs astride him. She impales herself on his erection, crying out in relief as they move together, foreheads resting against each other and their eyes locked as she flexes her hips forward and back, pleasure taking away all the hurt and pain.

When she closes her eyes to focus on the sensations, he brings his mouth to her ear, teasing at the lobe with his tongue and whispering to her, his thumb appearing against her clit and sending shockwaves down her legs.

“I love you so much. You’re the most important thing in the world to me, okay? You’re the only thing that matters.” His affirmations flood her with dopamine and she comes hard around him, the feeling extending to the tips of her fingers and turning her joints to jelly. He clutches her to him, finding his own release as he continues to make grand declarations of forever.

As they come down, he peppers her with kisses in the same way he’d started, desperation replaced with contentment. He pulls back a little to look at her.

“Will you come home?” he asks hopefully, and she nods with a soft smile.

“Don’t ever tell Missy we had sex on her couch,” she says, and they both laugh.

#the x files #txf #dana scully #fox mulder #gillovny #msr #sculder #x files fanfic #alternate universe

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palettes-and-prompts · 4 years

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25 Dialogue Prompts for Each Color of the Rainbow (Part 2)

Red 1) "How could anyone not like me? I'm perfect." 2) "Quick! They're coming, how do I look? Do I have anything in my teeth? Do I smell because I need to look perfect!" 3) "Wow, have you been working out, you look great!" 4) "Oh, this old thing? I just threw this on." 5) "You really think I'm beautiful?" 6) "I wasn't meant to be some little star. I was meant to be the sun." 7) "They haven't texted me since the date and it's been a week. What if they didn't like me? No, that's ridiculous, I'm wonderful. Something must've just happened to their phone." 8) "I'm going to die alone aren't I? Just me, some cats, and boxed wine. At least Real Housewives will always be there for me." 9) "They're obviously not looking for perfection because I'm right here." 10) "I'm not shopping at a thrift store, that's where poor people shop!" 11) "You had better change for the party because you're fucking high if you think I'm going to let you stand next to me while you wear that outfit." 12) "A gift? For me? Oh you shouldn't have! Oh...a book...wow...thanks. You, uh, really shouldn't have." 13) "Please be a loser somewhere else." 14) "I'm on a diet where I have to drink kale. If you value your life leave right now." 15) "I want this entire box of Kit Kats." "....the whole box." "NOW!" 16) "It's scary out there, I'm not coming with you to check out that noise." "Okay." "No! Wait, don't actually leave me alone." 17) "I am not a scaredy cat! I just don't like when things pop out at me or creep around in the dark or come within ten feet of me unless they're hot." 18) "I would never ever fall in love with you." "Okay, well, you're still holding onto me." "I just didn't want to get lost!" 19) "Wow, you're really strong. Like...really strong." "If you're that thirsty there's a water fountain right over there." 20) "God look at them. They look so good when they're sweaty. Oh fuck they're taking their jacket off." "You're drooling." 21) "Give me back the honey bun or I will scratch your eyes out." "You need to calm down." "You need to not tell me to calm down." 22) "Everyone keeps getting flowers and it's so annoying. Like, we have work to do, you shouldn't be worried about getting flowers. I hate flowers, I-" "I think there are some flowers on your desk." "Oh my god I love flowers! They're so pretty. Aww, I wonder who got them for me." " 23) "I think you're the most dramatic person I know." "That can't be true, I'm not dramatic." "You literally cried yesterday when no one noticed you got your hair trimmed like a centimeter." "It was a big difference from how it was!" "It was a centimeter!" 24) "My ideal home is one that's small but enough to have a family in." "They're such a fucking liar, their ideal home has to have mirrors everywhere, a double curved staircases so they can walk down dramatically, a maze in the backyard, a fountain in the front with a circular driveway, but then the road in is lined with trees because their dramatic and when you get to the gate it has their last initial on it." "Oh my god, you do listen to me!" "Unfortunately yes." 25) "Are you in love with me?" "What? No, I can't stand you." "You remember everything about me! You pay attention to everything I say and I can be very..." "Dramatic?" "Passionate about certain things. You hate it." "I don't hate it." "So you love it?" "We don't have to put a label on what I feel." "Yes we do. You love me!" "Fine, okay, I love you." "Really?" "Don't get all passionate right now." "I'm already planning our wedding in my mind."

Orange 1) "You're really cool, we should hang out sometime. Maybe you could watch me skateboard." 2) "You're always stressing yourself out, why don't you let me help you unwind?" 3) "It's just you, me, and this goat you told me not to get." 4) "You think hiding your snacks is gonna stop me from eating them? I'm like a bloodhound, I will sniff them out!" 5) "What do you think would happen if I snorted Cheeto dust?" 6) "Remember when you told me not to try to reach into the vending machine when my chips got stuck because my arm would get stuck in there. Well, the good news is I got my chips. Bad news is I wont be home for a while." 7) "You know how Gaston ate four dozen eggs every morning to help him get large? Okay, so that's bullshit because when I was a kid I tried to do that and I barely ate a dozen before I threw up." 8) "Oh, I'm an idiot? Because I think I'm fucking styling in these diamond studded crocs while I ride my razor scooter!" 9) "Oh, I always get a perfect score on any test I take. Everyone always thinks I'm cheating but the doctors say I've got something called an photographic memory where I only look at things once and I just remember it. Anyway, wanna see how many ants I can eat?" 10) "One time I got stung by a bee on the tongue because I wanted to see what it felt like." "Did it feel good?" "It did not." 11) "I used to think Bronchitis meant I was growing broccoli inside my lungs." "It doesn't mean that. When did you find out that it didn't mean that?" "Oh, um, like... a few days ago." "A FEW DAYS AGO?!" 12) "So, I did something." "What did you do?" "I should preface by saying I am not smart." "What. Did. You. Do?" 13) "Just shaved a cat to look like a lion with a mane." "That's so stupid, why would you do that?" "Why don't you look at the results first?" 14) "I beat all of Super Mario World and found every single secret." "When's the last time you slept?" "Last time I what?" 15) "Why are you all twitchy?" "I just mixed every energy drink from the gas station with pixie sticks." "Jesus, we're going to the hospital." 16) "I know eating cheese makes you constipated and everything, but like, how much cheese? I don't want to be constipated so what's the maximum amount I can eat without that happening." 17) "Don't freak out, but I'm in jail." "JAIL?!" "It's all a big misunderstanding!" 18) "Can I tell you something without you getting mad?" "You always ask me this and I always get mad." "Yeah, but like, maybe this time you could just...not get mad?" 19) "You are the human equivalent of the smiley face emoji." "Aww! Thank you." "It wasn't a compliment." 20) "You look like you eat sunshine and shit rainbows." "Actually I eat Lucky Charms. Well, just the charms actually with like a little bit of the lucky bit." "You're so positive it sickens me." 21) "I love Thanksgiving." "Yikes. Why?" "Because I get to have dinner with all my friends and family. There's no pressure to buy gifts or anything. We all just come together and appreciate each other." "I could put everything you've ever said on a Hallmark card." 22) "Do you know how much I love you?" "You send me every heart emoji before bed and end it with a kissy face with the words 'I love you' every night. I think I get it." "I'll start doing it every morning just to be sure." 23) "You know how in Inside Out there's all the different little people that represent each emotion?" "Yeah, I love that movie!" "Yeah, I think your Joy emotion person killed your Sad emotion person." "What? No! She wouldn't do that!" " 24) "You have to stop crying every time this scene in the movie comes up." "He thinks she doesn't love him!" "It's just Shrek. You've seen how it ends, you can quote it for fuck's sake!" "I know but he doesn't know right now!" "Oh my god." 25) "I swallowed the key to Person A's car." "Oh my god why would you do that?" "I thought it'd be funny but now I'm worried about it." "Oh now you're worried about it?"

Yellow 1) "I heard everyone survived, is that true?" "Yes, everyone's fine." "Pity." 2) "If being classy means being mean to everyone who's considered to be beneath you then I must be the classiest bitch in the whole fucking world." 3) "I don't think you're beneath me, I know you are." 4) "A piece of advice I'll give to you for free. Stay out of my way unless you'd like to be crushed under my foot." 5) "Hmm, I wonder which shoes I should wear to stomp on the dreams of others today." 6) "Don't cry on me, this jacket is worth more than your car!" 7) "Oh no, I won. Aww! And you wanted it so bad, didn't you?" 8) "You know, in duos it's usually one's the beauty and one's the brains but in our case I guess I really lucked out, didn't I?" 9) "Don't think for a second I'm interested in you, I'm only speaking to you because I have to." 10) "They took something that was mine. And now I have to kill them." 11) "I was scheduled to ruin someone's life today, but I guess I can save that for another time. Let's hang out!" 12) "I know that person, their significant other made my friend cry so I slept with their boyfriend/girlfriend and made them fall in love with me. I can't wait to be there when they tell them they're leaving them for me." 13) "You need good friends, people who will watch out for you and help you handle your problems." 14) "Listen here, you little shit, I've worked hard to get this perfect so if you fuck it up I will destroy everything you love." 15) "Oh, how cute! You think you're a threat to me." 16) "Next time you try to threaten me remember who you're dealing with. Because I don't do threats, I make promises. And when I promised I'd ruin your life I intended to keep that promise." 17) "Oh my god, here comes that insufferable bitc-Hi! Oh my god, I haven't seen you in forever, you look so good!" 18) "Oh, gag me with a fucking spoon. If I have to listen to you idiots try to talk and breathe at the same time I'm going to jump in front of a fucking bus." 19) "Move! I'll handle it just like I handle everything, with grace and vague threats." 20) "What do you mean they're in love with me? Did they say that word for word? Because you know I'm in love with them so if this is a trick it's not funny and I'll fucking kill you. Did they say that word for word?" 21) "I only have strengths I don't have weaknesses." 22) "They called me heartless? I'm not heartless! I'm nice. I'm so fucking nice. I'm going to prove how fucking nice I am and then they're going to look like an idiot for saying that!" 23) "Stop crying. You look fucking pathetic and you're not pathetic because I don't have pathetic friends. So keep your head up, bury your feelings, and act like the goddamn champion you are." 24) "Don't speak, you could make the town idiot feel like a genius." 25) "Stop acting like a loser or you're not allowed to stand next to me anymore."

Green 1) "Well, look at that, we're all alone. So, anything you wanna say to me? Anything you wanna do to me?" 2) "Of course I have sex for money, you think I'd just give all this away for free?" 3) "What do you mean I can't wear this to the funeral? It's my mourning crop top." 4) "How's my outfit?" "Hideous. You should shred it and then burn it just to be safe." 5) "Ew, what do you want?" 6) "I'm gonna need you to not stand next to me at this party, I don't want anyone thinking we came together." 7) "Does this make me look slutty?" "Not at all, it's very modest for you actually." "Ew, okay, I'm gonna go change." 8) "Why are you putting on glitter? We're going to a toddler's birthday party." "Look, if you wanna look like that that's your choice. I plan on looking like I hunt mythical creatures for a living." 9) "The robbers took everything in my house." "Yeah, but they left your clothes so what do you think that says about them?" 10) "I thought you hated the thrift store." "I did, I thought it was a very sad little place, but then I started designing my own outfit with all the decent things they sell and so now I love the thrift store." 11) "They broke up with you? You?! No, I don't think so. Come with me, we're going to fix you and you're going to show them what they're missing." 12) "They might have more money than me but I'm the one who has clear skin and the ability to not look like trash." 13) "A choker can be something that says it all. It can say 'I'm fun and I love hanging out with my friends' but it can also say 'I only have rough sex' you know?" 14) "You're not my type." "You haven't even turned around to see me." "Didn't need to. I could smell that cheap cologne/perfume from a mile away." "What is your type?" "Rich." 15) "What are you doing?" "Eating take out and watching porn." "What kind of porn?" "Bondage porn." "Oh, that kind of day, huh? Should I come over?" "No, I'll just try to sleep wit you." "You do that even when you're not sad." "Okay, you can come over." 16) "Where are you going with my keys?" "I've got to kill someone." "Okay, make sure you don't get blood on my seats." 17) "No, highlight yellow and highlighter orange are not real colors. Okay? Are you a hunter trying not to get shot or a construction worker? No, you're not. You're trying to seduce someone. So lets get rid of this monstrosity and find something that'll make your eyes look pretty." 18) "I love you very much and it's because I love you that I can say this. Please don't wear that outfit or you will embarrass me." 19) "You just kissed me." "Yeah, I did." "Why? Did I seem like I was drowning or that I needed mouth to mouth? Were you trying to kill a bug with your lips? Why would you kiss me?" "I like you. A lot." "Hahaha...wait, seriously?" "Why's that so hard to believe?" "Because I'm me, people don't like me, they just like looking at me." "Well, I like you. A lot. And if you like me maybe we could get some dinner later or something." "Okay!" 20) "Oh my god, is that a skort? I think I might vomit. Skorts are for children, not adults. Once you hit eighteen you are legally banned from wearing skorts unless you play tennis or something. Do you play tennis? No. I didn't think so. Burn that." 21) "Camo is disgusting and if I ever catch any of you wearing it we are no longer friends." 22) "Your shorts are a little too short." "Yeah? You like it?" "You're attracting a lot of attention." "But am I attracting your attention?" 23) "Oh, wow, that's a bright shade of yellow. Um, why don't we try a few different outfits for fun before we decide on that one, okay?" 24) "Hey, I came as fast as I could, where's the body?" "Actually, I called you for a--you came here prepared to hide a body with me?" "Of course I did, you're my best friend." "Aww!" 25) "I only have sex for free when I like someone, and for you, honey? It'll cost triple what I normally charge."

Blue 1) "I heard the pet store got new puppies and kittens, wanna go see them with me?" 2) "We should go ice skating!" 3) "I love having picnics with you, you always bring my favorite foods." 4) "I love spending time with you." 5) "I think I wanna spend the rest of my life with you." 6) "Are you cold? You can wear my jacket if you want!" 7) "I don't want any of that stuff. I just want you. I've always wanted you." 8) "I wonder what it's like to hug a cloud." "Your hands would go right through it." "Yeah, but I've always wanted to touch one." 9) "Is it okay if we stay a little longer?" "We can stay until close if you'd like." "I just really like looking at the fish." "I know." 10) "Could you hug me for like an hour?" "Yeah, okay, wanna watch a movie while we do that or?" 11) "We have to leave right now. The Easter Bunny is at the store up the road and they're doing pictures." "You're an adult." "Please!!!" "Fine. We can go sit on the employee dressed in a rabbit suit's lap." "Yay! Thank you!" 12) "You can't eat that much cotton candy, you'll make yourself sick." "But it's good!" "You'll get a cavity." 13) "Can we go to the fair?" "We're not riding the toddler rides again. People gave us so many dirty looks last year." "But what about the teacups?" "We can ride the teacups, but none of the other kid ones." 14) "Can we shoot fireworks this year?" "You hate the ones with loud noises." "Yeah, but I like looking at them." "I'll buy earmuffs for you." 15) "Can we paint the side room." "Sure, what color?" "I was thinking like maybe a purple or green. Maybe all the colors." "Like a rainbow room? Why would we do the whole room?" "It'd be fun, it'd be cute for a side room or an office, maybe a baby room." "Baby room?" "Maybe. I mean, if you like that idea." "I think it's a great idea." 16) "Can we get a dog?" "You're an adult, if you want a dog you don't have to ask me." "Yeah, but it's your house too so..." "Yes, we can get a dog. We can go to the shelter tomorrow." 17) "So, I was thinking maybe we could have our wedding during the spring or maybe the summer." "You have bad allergies during those times." "Yeah, but I was thinking we could get fake flowers and I could take some allergy medication and it could still look like a spring or a summer wedding." "I'll start looking at fake flowers." "I'll check venues." 18) "Why are you up so early?" "Look outside! It's snowing!!!" "And you woke me up so we could play in it?" "Uh huh." "One hour and then you let me go back to sleep." "I'll go get my gloves!!" 19) "We have to go to the zoo." "You hate the zoo, you said you don't like seeing animals in cages." "I know but the goats just gave birth to baby goats and they're finally letting them out to be pet today!" 20) "I dream about flying all the time but I never thought I'd actually get to do it." 21) "Thanks for tonight, I had a really great time with you. I hope we can do it again soon." 22) "We should move in together. I mean, if you want." 23) "I don't want to lose you, and it took me a while to realize but I know what I want now. Will you marry me?" 24) "I wouldn't trade you for all the gold, silver, gems, or all the most expensive things in the world." 25) "You really are the love of my life."

Indigo 1) "They're obnoxious and loud and stupid and I can't believe I'm in love with them." 2) "You may be a star but you'll never be as big a star as VY Canis Majoris." 3) "The most fucked up thing I ever learned was that Luna moths don't have mouths or a digestive tract because their sole purpose is to mate. So they live for a week and then die because they starve to death." 4) "I think you have more outfits than you have IQ points." 5) "Can you just stop doing...whatever it is you're doing for like ten minutes." 6) "God you're so annoying, just stop breathing. Please? Just stop." 7) "I wish I were a plant, I wouldn't have to talk or think or do all this shit. I'd just have to soak up sunlight, soak up rain, and take in carbon dioxide. Being a plant really is the fucking dream." 8) "Hey, I heard Person A broke up with you. That sucks. So, um, do you think I could get my Chemistry book?" 9) "Are you still upset about your break up with Person A? You shouldn't be, I've seen their family members, they don't age well. But, um, that neighbor of yours, the cute one, their family looks pretty good. And with your genes you two would have some above average looking children." "Thank you?" "You're welcome." 10) "You know, you're terrible at giving advice." "Yeah, well, I'm not used to being around other humans." "Maybe just say people. Calling other people humans is kind of...weird." "Noted." 11) "Do you want to come to a party with me tonight?" "To what? Drink, embarrass myself, have to listen to terrible music, and interact with people I don't even like?" "Yes." "Pass. I'd rather be here studying plants." 12) "Would you like to go out sometime, on like a date?" "Sure, I guess. You just set up the blind date and I'll do my best. Though, maybe you could find me someone who at least can carry on a conversation with me." "No, I mean would you want to go out on a date with me?" "With you? Why would you want to date me? Don't you have plenty of other options?" "I like you." "We wouldn't work out. You and I are too different. You are good looking and nice and deserve someone who's like you. You don't want someone like me anyways. Besides I'd bore you to death before the appetizers came out." 13) "I care about you." "You? Thought you didn't care about anyone." "I don't. Usually. But I think the reason I care so much is because I like you." "You like me?" "Yeah, it's um... it's a new feeling for sure." 14) "What they said back there. You're not a robot." "No, I am. They're right. It's hard for me to be like the others. I didn't grow up having friends so I didn't know what it was like to care about anything other than school or projects." "You care about me. You said you care about me. Is that true." "Of course it's true." "Then you're not a robot." 15) "You kissed me back there. Why did you do that?" "I was testing a hypothesis." "Oh yeah? What was your hypothesis." "You would kiss me back if I kissed you." "And the results?" "Well, if worked the first time. But a good scientists always checks their work to be sure, right?" "That's correct, yes." 16) "Have you ever kissed anyone?" "I've done a lot of things." "Have you had sex?" "Yes, but it was purely for research. I wanted to know what certain things felt like and what certain things would do for others." "Only you could manage to make sex sound so boring." 17) "Hey, I was--are you watching porn?" "I'm researching for an experiment." "What kind? You gonna see what happens when you put your hand down your pants to that?" "No, I was studying to see if I could tell the difference between a real orgasm and a fake one." "If you wanted to study that you could have just asked me." 18) "Do you think I should socialize more?" "Since when do you care what I think? You're the one with a billion degrees." "Well, you're better with people than I am." 19) "You're hugging me." "Yeah. It's what friends do, they hug." "It's, um, nice. I think." 20) "Yesterday I felt the urge to hug the mailman. Isn't that weird?" "Did you hug the mailman?" "No." "Then it's not that weird. Probably just your body telling you it needs to be touched physically, you know?" "What?" "You crave physical touch." 21) "I think I'm lonely." "Yeah, I think you are too." "Should I start dating?" "Do you want to date?" "Not particularly." "Then maybe just try getting friends." 22) "If I have to spend another evening with that idiot I might lose it." "Is this because they thought photosynthesis had to do with photography?" "Don't remind me." 23) "We're having dinner with my friends tonight." "They hate me." "They don't hate you, you're just smarter than all of them combined." 24) "I can't talk to Person A, they tried to ask me about plant cells and actually thought that I was talking about a cellphone made of plants." "They're not very good at Science, but they like you a lot an they're trying to find ways to talk to you. It's cute. You should give them a chance. Take them to a Science museum." "Like, the ones for kids?" "Yeah. They'll love it." "Fine, but if it starts to go bad I'm texting you to call me and say there's an emergency so I can get out of it." "As long as you give it a try." 25) "They're in love with you, you know? Why do you ruin all your chances at love?" "Because sometimes I'm not sure I'm capable of feeling it."

Violet 1) "You smell like desperation. That a new cologne/perfume or is that just you?" 2) "I'm not here to play nice, I'm here to protect your ass because you couldn't follow simple instructions!" 3) "God, you are so annoying. I can't believe I have to put up with you for six months." 4) "Get your shit, we're getting out of here. I'm not leaving you in this hellhole, alright? Pack your stuff, you're coming with me." 5) "Are we gonna be a family?" "Let's not call it that, let's call it I'm taking care of you for a while alright?" "For how long?" "For as long as you want me to." 6) "Are you gonna be my mom/dad?" "WOAH! No. Absolutely not. I'll be your guardian, okay? And it's only temporary." 7) "Goddamn it, kid, wake up! You can't annoy the shit out of me for months and make me care about you just so you can die like this. I'm not allowing it. Come on, get up, kid. If you get up I'll take you to that Funland place you wanted to go. Anywhere you wanna go. I'll be better to you. I'll...fuck! I'll take care of you for the rest of your life. I'll teach you how to ride a bike and be there for you when you do Science fairs and shit. I'll be your mom/dad." 8) "You're stupid trying to save me like that. You can't swim." "You never taught me how to." "Yeah, well, I'm gonna teach you when we get out of here." 9) "You're evil and manipulative and you're mean and I kinda love that about you, kid. You remind me of me. If you want a place to sleep and food you don't have to dig out of the trash you can stay with me as long as you want." 10) "Can I get a motorcycle?" "Absolutely not, kid. As long as I'm alive the only two wheel thing you'll be riding on is a fucking bicycle." "Well, can I get a bicycle?" "Yeah, we can steal you one later." 11) "You might be the most annoying person I've ever met in the world but I'd die for you." 12) "If you ever come near me or my family I'll fucking kill you. I will bury you in a shallow grave and leave you as food for the worms. Do you understand me?" 13) "You're not going to die here because I'm gonna protect you." 14) "Hey, you trust me don't you?" "Yeah." "Good, you're going to have to disguise yourself. And whatever you do keep your head down, don't talk, and don't let go of me, okay?" 15) "Hey short stack." "You came for me?" "Course I did, did you really think I'd leave you behind?" 16) "I'm coming with you." "You're not." "I am and you can't stop me." "I can handcuff you to that bench over there and leave Person A the keys." "...well I would appreciate if you didn't do that." 17) "Hey there, stranger, haven't seen you in a while." "What the fuck are you doing here?" "Is that really how you greet your best friend?" 18) "Out of my way." "You'll die if you go in there." "And you'll die if I don't go in there." 19) "I'm always gonna be here for you, you know that? 20) "Woah, what's wrong, why are you crying?" "You'll be leaving after this." "Come here, I'm not leaving you after this. I'm staying here with you. Did you really think I'd leave you here all alone? You can barely make toast." 21) "Hey, you can't run off like that again, do you hear me?" "Yeah, whatever-" "No! No, you don't get to whatever me about this. You could have fucking died out there. So you look me in the eye and you promise me you're never going to do that again!" "I-I promise I'll never do it again!" 22) "Look, I'm not your parent so I'm not going to tell you what to do, but that kid you're hanging around is bad news. I've seen their arrest record, you shouldn't be hanging around them. I know they're nice right now but people like that take advantage of nice. I would know. I used to be like them." 23) "I love you. More than anything in the world and that's why I train so hard. I have to train harder because now I have to be stronger. Because now I finally have something worth fighting for." 24) "You can't come with me. You're staying here." "I want to fight!" "You're sick. You need to stay here with Person A, take some medicine, and get some rest." 25) "Hey, watch your mouth, no one talks like that in front of my kid!"

#175 dialogue prompts #color prompts #25 prompts for each color #dialogue prompts #prompts #writer #write #writing prompts #fic prompts #fic inspiration #fic writing

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mrs-nate-humphrey · 3 years

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no-sleep 1x09rewatch ramble-essay (all content warnings for the episode apply here)

i was just like. oh i’ll watch a feel-good episode of gossip girl! s1 thanksgiving ep is great isn’t it! blairenate family feels!!! ruflyson love triangle drama!!! vdw siblings AND humphrey siblings hanging out!!! dan’s “see you later waldorf” *salutes & closes the cab door* !!!

& like. yes i DID remember serena’s whole not being sober on thanksgiving thing, and yes i DID remember blair’s ED relapse - which is heavy, but eating disorder content isn’t particularly triggering for me personally (i find it kind of cathartic, if we’re being honest) BUT . i somehow forgot. that THIS was the episode which has howard’s suicide attempt?? and now i have some of the most painful nate feels in the world.

blah blah blah, leight’s acting brought me to tears, which probably doesn’t sound like a very big deal but sort of is, for a variety of reasons (watching things doesn’t usually make me cry, it’s happened maybe a single-digit number of times before + also just my blair feels in general --> she’s a really interesting character but i don’t find her AS relatable as i do dan, or nate, or vanessa, or maybe even serena at times --> so i usually do have a bit of a disconnect re: watching her, which i really do not have for like. dan, for instance.)

i just cannot divorce that very cute outfit blair wears with her ED relapse - which brings me to the next point, which is that blair is maybe THE only character ever for whom her clothing choices and her plotlines are so interwoven in my head (lemon yellow shirt and funky little hat is her mean bridesmaids competitive game day, yellow-&-orange dress is her choose chuck over dan moment, genderqueer plaid skirt and grey shirt is her “dan loves me for me” moment, white shirt with the pink flowers is her get owned by nelly yuki moment, etc etc)... the only other time i noticed outfits is derena cotillion, but that’s just because i LOVE derena cotillion, and date matching shirts, but that’s because i am tuned into all things date and couldn’t possibly tell you what those outfits actually symbolise, with the exception of dan’s pink flannel shirt from when he’s holding milo. or any of the outfits from 2x06 because that is my episode hands down. oh hey would you look at that, i do actually form associations. but you gotta believe me on this, blair’s the one it happens most naturally for, which is very strange. i think it’s because her outfits are always Statements in a way that the other characters never do, except for jenny, who is a fashion designer, so it’s Different for her. what am i trying to say.

oh yeah another iconic outfit is serena’s golden jacket and bright blue pants to the morgue to identify what might be chuck’s corpse. she literally dressed like she was going clubbing and i respect her so much for that.

anyway. gosh. nate just - getting gaslit by his mom, getting reprimanded by his dad for telling his mom to stop being rude/petty... howard was like “don’t fight my fights for me” but nate wasn’t even doing that?? he was just asking his mom Not to be rude, and the fact that nate got told off at the end of that interaction... uh. it shows a lot about the archibald family unit in general and just. how nate is sort of treated as ... i don’t have the right word, but my brain is like “second class citizen”... which is absolutely NOT the right concept for nate but like. he is treated like he is Less a part of the family than his parents are....... RIGHT until one of them (or both of them!) fuck up in a big way and it’s down to nate to fix their mess. i haven’t read “adult children of emotionally immature parents” but from whatever i’ve heard about it, i think nate could do with reading it. or not. maybe it’d just make him sadder.

and fuck - nate’s whole talk with his dad and his dad telling nate that he doesn’t know how he can go on, etc etc... idk what to say or where to draw the line but i have really complicated howard & nate feelings. i really truly think anne was the worse parent (not like it’s a competition of course) and i sometimes seriously wonder if maybe howard archibald had a more supportive life partner, maybe he wouldn’t have ended up being ~like that~ to nate (doesn’t justify anything of course). anyway nate’s sitting by the hospital bed and his dad is denying his suicide attempt at first and nate’s just like, no, stop. this is also making me think now of nate sitting by serena’s hospital bed after tripp, and nate possibly sitting by blair’s hospital bed some point pre-series (eating disorders are serious and i really do think, esp with eleanor being eleanor, that it must’ve gotten pretty bad for blair before she got help - which. sorry. i know, it’s sad but i’m just putting together pre-existing implications.) all i’m saying is some point in the future i wouldn’t be surprised if nate’s just. uncomfortable in hospitals and unable to piece together why. oh yikes i just remembered blair’s miscarriage. at which point do hospitals become overly suffocating for natie, remind him of his own helplessness, etc... because i really think they would. anyway.

anne archibald chills me because she is such an accurate representation of a very specific kind of mother and. i hate it for nate obviously but i struggle to remember a time i’ve seen a tv mom who i can 100% relate to so hard. as in. fuck. worded that wrong. whose SON i can relate to so hard. ouch. this may be a moot point because i don’t watch much tv, but honestly anne & nate is just. a Lot. in a way that is significant to Me, specifically. this is part of my pet peeve (not enough to fight with anybody don’t worry) when people make edits about mothers & daughters, as if what was happening between nate & anne, somehow didn’t have the same complications - i honestly think there’s some solid eleanor & blair/ anne & nate parallels to be drawn. and we’ve been over this somewhere else, but lily & serena / rufus & dan / rufus & jenny definitely have a lot of the same specific issues (parent projecting on child, etc.) again - everyone engages w the show differently, im ready to admit that like... maybe 65% of my problems with the ‘mothers & daughters’ reading probably stem from gender dysphoria, lol. but whatever.

i have feelings about dan & alison, too... i really do think dan was closer to his mom than to his dad for majority of his childhood, and this ep really cements it. anyway. i don’t have any more words and i’m tired. and i might just watch derena cotillion episode because . derena cotillion episode my beloved...

wait wait before i forget. venn diagram of humphrey family & van der bilt family & playing american football. i know this has come up before but like. here we go i;m thinking about it again. both dan and nate have been competitively thrown in the grass by a family member in the name of sports. no wonder nate chose dan over chuck in 2x06 (i would put a tone indicator but even i can’t tell if this is /gen or /j)

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nickgerlich · 3 years

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Sign Of The Times

Imagine someone else’s name on your house. Or a giant Ford nameplate on your Chevy. Or you get to work only to discover the new employee’s name is also on your door.

That’s how Macy’s feels these days at its flagship New York City store, atop which Amazon wants to lease a billboard. So serious is the problem that Macy’s is now in a legal battle with its landlord. Can you even wrap your mind around the possibility of this year’s Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade with live television accidentally capturing views of that billboard? Yikes.

I get it. That would be a sucker punch. It would hurt especially badly going into the holiday shopping season. It would be like going to your local Best Buy and seeing an Amazon sign on its roof, suggesting that people can order online from their cars. Wait. I already do that.

But one of the big problems for retailers is that they often do not own their buildings. They lease them. And unless there are explicit agreements between landlord and tenant governing what either party can or cannot do, then bad things can happen.

In Macy’s case, it had a long-term lease on the billboard as well as the building, but this last August that billboard lease expired. Suddenly Amazon was there to try to get it.

Macy’s, though, argues that its landlord was already negotiating with Amazon before the billboard lease ended. And Macy’s is scared stiff that this might not work in their favor, going on record as saying there would be “immeasurable” harm to their business.

Their argument is based on hard-to-measure constructs such as image, good will, reputation, and brand equity. Nowhere did they mention the possible effect on sales and profits, but that too would be hard to quantify. There are simply too many other variables that could affect Macy’s, and their reaction over this shows how much it fears Amazon.

Rightfully so. Amazon, as we all know, is crushing the competition. The very mention of their name send chills up and down the spines of practically every retailer.

Macy’s really has no choice but to file suit, because to do nothing would signify they know they’re not all that competitive anymore, and are just willing to take it. But on the other hand, the fact that they are countering highlights their vulnerability. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

Regardless, Macy’s needs to be spending even more time figuring out how it is going to survive, not just this holiday season, but in the long run. It is vulnerable. Amazon knows it. We all know it. And Amazon is poking at what it knows is a weak foe that is struggling to stand up, much less run.

It’s going to take a herculean effort on behalf of Macy’s to regain any semblance of the fabled retailer it once was. Because if they cannot regain relevance through assortment, quality, and price, it doesn’t stand much chance of ever being relevant again.

And that is when the name of the parade will change.

Dr “Sign Here, Please“ Gerlich

Audio Blog

#marketing #Macy's #Amazon #billboard

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pantheracore · 3 years

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Story Time 1

I’ve decided I’m going to partially start using my blog as a well, actual blog. Starting with this 4am story time. (It is 4am as me writing this.) Special thank you to that one post about ‘would you help a cop in distress, share if you wouldn’t’ or however it is phrased. Also I don’t care if someone reads this or not, it’s just nice to actually talk about.

Okay so, I once dated a cop. Get your ‘yikes’ and ‘gross’ out now, because it becomes worse knowing he was a cishet and neurotypical cop and I’m transmasc and neurodivergent.

The story starts with a little bit of context in high school, I was going through a shit ton of trauma at the time, trying to cope in a dangerous home life and struggling not to be kicked out (which inevitably happened at the age of 14 six days before my birthday, sorry for another time though). I had been introduced to this guy through volunteering at the concessions during football games. We started texting and chatting a lot, one of the big topics was about Arctic Monkeys, which comes up again later.

So, skip forward a few weeks and I end up telling this guy that I really liked him. Of course I wasn’t having the best attachments at the time for reasons above, but I was able to open up a bit and had my first crush. Well, nothing comes of it, he dates someone else two weeks later, then I eventually get kicked out, move out of state and back a few times, before finally settling back in that town. As an adult now, I kind of minded my own business until out of the blue, he messages me again. Now, I still had a soft spot for him because yknow, he was my first real crush and person I liked. I could still remember the comfort while talking to him and dealing with all my personal life bullshit. We start talking and he ends up hanging out.

We would often go out to eat, him treating me, and when we would hang out at my house, he, like every other cishet guy I dated, pressured me into yknow, nsfw activities, knowing I was going by aroace at the time. After that started happening, we would end up talking like once every other week, or even once every three weeks. I didn’t care cause we weren’t in an official relationship yet.

I decided to end up telling him I kind of wanted to date, and invited him to Thanksgiving with my family. Now that whole thing is a story for a different time because it involves my heavily christian step-aunt who claims to know I had DID when I was in the 3rd grade and who gets ‘prophetic messages’ and just bleh. That’s a trip in of itself.

Everything goes well, my aunt pulls the ‘oh we all know he really cares about you, you can tell’ bullshit. Which it was. So not only am I being pressured into NSFW (non-maliciously tbh) but my family is now pressuring me into dating him and staying with him.

Well luckily for me, though I didn’t realize it at the time, he would keep coming over once every like 2 weeks. I would ask to hang out with him more and his friends (which he only took me to see once) and I even old him about availability in the apartment complex I lived in. So him and his friend moved in a building or so down. I was excited cause this meant he could come over more right?

Yeah no. That’s when he started to really ghost me and talk to me maybe once a month. He would sit there and make a plan to walk over and see me, but always cancel. After not hearing from him for 3 months I finally decided I was done being a side piece, cause guess what, I was apparently.

I found out he was dating someone else through a mutual friend later and they actually got engaged a few weeks ago. LMFAO. It’s fine I have a loving partner now.

Also this is like my most tame story about anyone I have ever dated. Others I might talk about later include a couple I dated where one of them took advantage of me while I was stupid drunk, then that time I dated a 21 year old when I was 17, oh and the person I almost bought a promise ring who left me because they let someone worm inside their brain and dated two people who made me extremely uncomfy one of which was 10 years older than them. :D

Also fuck cops, every single one I know is a piece of shit including one whose son did a lot of really bad things and he never did anything about it.

I swear my luck is fucking god tier. Anyways, I’ll tell a funny story next time.

#panthera story time.txt

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nostalthicc · 4 years

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Maybe a fanfic where you’ve been with Jeff for awhile and you decide to go home for the holidays and introduce him to your family. Includes your mom loving him, siblings not so sure but end up bonding, dad doesn’t like him at first, and then seeing Jeff interact with your nieces/nephews. Idk, something super fluffy and cute!

IMMMM SOOORYYY this is sooo bad :(((

“come on, jeff. you’ve already met my mom and she absolutely loved you- more than me i think,” you told your boyfriend, squeezing his hand in your own. you had been trying to ease his nerves for the entire road trip to your parent’s cabin, they had invited the two of you for the annual pre-thanksgiving trip this year. “they will love you just as much as i do if anything i think they’re more upset i haven’t taken you sooner.”

“yes but that was just your mom, now it’s your sibling and your dad- who i know for a fact he doesn’t like me because everyone was sending me his twitter post.” you rolled your eyes as jeff tried to justify his reasons to be nervous, you could understand where he was coming from; meeting his parents was terrifying but you didn’t want to lead him in there with an ounce of doubt. seems a little too late, though. “we should go back, say your sick of something.”

you giggled, matching jeff’s serious expression with a goofy smile. “jeff, my dad is a comedian, he did that to you on purpose, just to scare you a little bit but trust me when he meets you he’ll be taking you into his studio making you listen to him talk about how he built his career from nothing.” you couldn’t lie, having comedian/actor as a dad made bringing the boyfriends home a little hard because he couldn’t help but mess with them but your dad had too big of a heart to truly treat someone bad. “he does something like this to every boy i bring home.”

“wait, how many are we talking? just for future references?”

“you guys made it early!” your mom engulfed you in a warm hug, her vanilla lavender perfume causes a rush of nostalgia to plague your mind. “how was the trip?” she asked before switching her attention to jeff who happily accepted her embrace.

“long and boring but i’m so glad to see the cabin,” you handed jeff your bag as you took in the house, clearly your mother had made some changes; there used to be colorful handprints littered along the floorboard from you and your older brother. “mama, where’s nathan?”

she pointed out back before giving the two of you a big smile and heading back into the study. jeff looked as though he was going through a mid-life crisis causing you to giggle, grabbing his hand to lead him to the back door to meet your siblings, nathan and rose.

“y/n! you’re here!” rose shouted as she jumped off the lawn chair, running up to you. rose always had a fondness of you since she was a baby, you’d do anything for your baby sister. she snuggled into the crook of your neck before looking up at jeff who awkwardly waved. “oh my gad, y/n/n! you never said you were dating jeff l-like jeff, jeff.” you have your sister a confused look. “from vlog squad!”

you looked back at jeff. “oh, i’m dating jeff from vlog squad.”

“this is awesome! have you met david? is he funny? wait, can i meet everyone one day?”

“i will answer all your questions later and after you properly introduce yourself,” you replied, resting your hands on her shoulders. rose had ADD and when she didn’t have school she wouldn’t take her medicine so you understood why she was so excited but also was a little worried she would act like this the entire visit. rose nodded while pulling out of your hug, as jeff and your sister talked you made your way to your brother who was sitting on the dock was his son, ryan and your dad.

“the favorite child has arrived.” you joked, causing both men to turn around.

“you wish.” nathan said pulling you into a tight hug, he held onto you until ryan started wiggling between your bodies. you messed with the baby before turning to your dad, engulfing him in a hug as well. your family was big on hugs, clearly. you took the baby from your brother’s arms as jeff made his way to the dock.

you cheerfully smiled at your boyfriend who looked frightened, to say the least. “guys, i want you to meet jeff, my boyfriend jeff.” you lightly hip-bumped jeff closer to the boys, both your dad and nathan held unreadable expressions.

“nice you meet you, i’m nathan and this is my son, ryan.” your brother was the first to speak, pointing to the baby in your arms before shaking jeff’s hand. you rolled your eyes at his formalities, nathan was a goofy person in general and his ‘tough brother’ act didn’t fool you one bit. you just wanted all the unneeded tension to be over with and for everyone to get along. you were fueled to force the bonding process

“so, jay. can i call you jay?” your dad said, patting jeff on the back as he pulled him a little closer. “yes? perfect! how did you and my daughter meet?”

jeff swallowed thickly before shaking the man’s hand. “well, uh, we met at our friend’s david’s house, he was having a party and we exchanged numbers and stuff. she did a video for my channel and we just clicked, sir, mr. y/l/n, sir.”

“y/d/n is fine, you know what? i’m gonna go help your mother.” your dad said rudely, causing not only you but nathan to scowl as well. he was being unnecessarily nasty towards jeff and it was clear he was doing it on purpose as well. at least with your brother, it was obvious he was messing around.

“yikes.” nathan joked.

“yikes? w-what does that mean?” jeff asked franticly, looking between you and nathan. “y/n? what does yikes mean.”

a little while later, your parents were finishing up on dinner while the rest of the kids messed around until they were called. you were sitting with tara- your brother’s wife -watching jeff and nathan play with their kids, as they talk about cars. you never knew how good jeff was with kids, it made you feel something deep down, a nice warm feeling you’d never want to go away. having jeff here with your family made you feel a type of way- even though your dad was treating him badly- it was like another piece to an unknown puzzle.

“i know that look,” tara teased, bumping her side to bring you out of your trance. you looked at her quizzically, your eyebrows furrowed together. “baby fever! i looked at your aunt’s son like that and what do you know another baby was born.”

“i most definitely do not have baby fever, i’m just happy.”

tara gave you a pointed look. “come on y/n, you’ve been together for a long time, and you’re content in your relationship so you know, marriage or kids. but that’s just my take on things.”

“can i tell you a secret?” you asked the women. “i’m pregnant.”

#jeff wittek imagine #jeff wittek edit #jeff wittek au #jeff wittek x reader #vlog squad #vlog squad imagine #jefft wittek #david dobrik #jason nash #toddy smith #carly incontro #erin gilfoy #corinna kopf #zane hijazi #vlog squad au #natalie mariduena #scotty sire

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365days365movies · 3 years

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April 1, 2021: The Gold Rush (1925)

If I’m going to start anywhere, it’s right at the beginning.

There’s absolutely no way I can start this month off without jumping headlong into the slapstick-filled era of the 1920s-1930s, and that begins (and arguably ends) with the man, the myth, the legend: Charlie Chaplin. And Chaplin’s got an interesting and tragic backstory, that it’s worth looking into. And he won’t be the first film star I get into, but we’ll get there.

Born in London in 1889, Chaplin was essentially raised in the world of the theatre, as both of his parents were entertainers. Raised in immense hardship and poverty, Chaplin’s early life wasn’t easy. His father left the family, and his mother struggled to provide. Eventually, she ended up becoming committed to an asylum, which led Charlie and his brother to live with their alcoholic father, which didn’t last long. Yikes.

Eventually, both parents were out of the picture by the time that Charlie was 14, with his father head, and his mother generally unwell, physically and mentally. Additionally, his brother enrolled in the military, leaving him completely alone. He left school and went to work, eventually becoming embroiled in the theatre and stage, and in 1908, the 19-year old Charlie joined a major theatre troupe, alongside another young actor named Stan Laurel. And in 1912, the group toured in the United States, where he was found by the head of the now defunct Keystone Studios, who were looking for a new star.

The first movie, Making a Living, didn’t go great for Chaplin or critics. But they didn’t give up, and put Chaplin in a second film: Mabel’s Strange Predicament. Here, Chaplin decided on a new costume. He wanted baggy pants, a tight coat, small hat, large shoes, and a little moustache. And with that outfit came the birth Chaplin’s most iconic character: The Tramp.

And BAM: history’s made. Because this film is RIDICULOUSLY successful, and very popular. A hell of a lot of films come from this, and by 1915, Chaplin was the biggest star in Hollywood history at the time. By 30 years old, he had founded his own studio, was funding his own pictures, and was the most well-known man in the United States outside of the President. And this was before he made his first feature film, The Kid.

1921 was the year that film came out, and I was originally going for that one as my first review...but I decided against it, in favor of another of his most famous films, The Gold Rush, which came out in 1925. By this point, Chaplin had also become a director, alongside actor and producer. He also...had done some not amazing things by this point. Yeah, Chaplin wasn’t the best dude, but that’s another story. I’m here to talk about this film, not about his real shitty track record with women and abandoning his children. Chaplin is a dark man with a dark history, I’ll just say that much.

But enough of that (for now)! Let’s get into the man and his works! After all, Chaplain also pioneered visual comedy in film, so this is going to be an interesting film! Let’s get into The Gold Rush! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap

First things first, I’d like to make something clear: I’m watching the 1925 version, reconstructed using some footage from the 1942 re-release, which added narration to it. Because I’m interested in seeing the original, as meant to be seen by Chaplin back in the day, I’m not looking at the re-release at all. But if you’re interested (and have the subscription), BOTH are available on HBO Max!

We begin at the top of Chilkoot Pass in Alaska, a difficult terrain and a challenge to anyone looking to make it rich in the Klondike. Men are hiking up the mountain in hardship, to try get their riches. This takes place at some point between 1898 and 1899, by the way. One of these men is a Lone Prospector, AKA The Tramp (Charlie Chaplin), who walks along the narrow path while being pursued by a bear, but eventually escapes said bear, finding himself on the snowy mountainside.

Also here is fellow prospector Big Jim McKay (Mack Swain), who’s just struck it rich. But then, as both men are on the mountainside, a snowstorm hits. The Lone Prospector finds his way to a small cabin, in which the wanted criminal Black Larsen resides.

The Lone Prospector makes his way inside, where he finds and eats a partially eaten rack of meat. However, Larsen tells him to get out, opening the door, causing the wind to get in. In a humorous sequence, the wind is so strong that it prevents the Prospector from leaving, an blows Jim McKay literally though the building. But soon, all three are in the cabin.

Larsen now tries to get both of them out with the threat of violence. He fires a warning shot with a shotgun, leading to struggle between Jim and Larsen for the gun, with Jim gaining the upper hand and allowing the Prospector and Larsen to stay. The storm persists for three days, and the men grow hungrier and hungrier in the process. All the while, the shack becomes ever closer to just toppling over from the storm winds.

The Prospector ends up eating a candle with sat, he’s so desperate, and the men use a pack of cards to decide who’s going out into the storm to look for food. Larsen loses, and he heads out with his dog (who CLEARLY isn’t into this whole thing, by the way). But Larsen’s still running from the police, who are hunkered down in the storm. They find him, and another struggle ensues, leading to Larsen killing them both in the snow, and stealing their supplies. Meanwhile, in the cabin, then men are so hungry that they prepare one of the Prospector’s shoes. Delicious.

As these two dine on this Thanksgiving meal (which is shown in very funny detail, including eating the laces as spaghetti), Larsen actually stumbles upon Jim’s gold, and he hunkers down there through the storm. This leaves the men to starve in the cabin, and also leads to...a very ironic sequence, now that I think about it.

See, this film was mostly made in Truckee, California. And the most iconic thing about Truckee is that it’s the resting place of a group of travelers on the Oregon Trail. See, in 1846, a group of settlers took the wrong pathway on some bad advice, and wound up stranded in the snow as a result of one of the worst blizzards in California history. This party of travelers, known as the Donner Party (YUP), starved for WEEKS, trapped in essentially a snow pit. 87 settlers went in, and 48 came out. Most died of the cold or starvation. And some survived by, well...eating the dead. Yup. Cannibalism. Which is why this is so ironic.

For a hot second, Jim sees the Prospector as a delicious chicken, and ties to eat him, firing at him with a shot gun and driving him outside. Realizing his delirium, he quickly apologizes, and the two make tentative amends. However, in self-defense, the Prospector takes to sleeping with the shotgun. The next morning, the two struggle for the gun, and Big Jim nearly kills the Prospector, but is interrupted by the return of the bear!

The Prospector shoots the bear, and the two finally have food to eat. Soon after, the storm subsides, and the two head their separate ways, with Jim going back to claim his gold fortune, and the Prospector left in the snowy wilderness. By the way, EVERY SINGLE TIME I type “the Prospector”, I start typing “the Tramp” first, then correct myself. Despite this being the first Chaplin movie I’ve ever seen, it’s such an iconic character that I can’t help but think of him as the Tramp. I’ll probably slip up at some point later without catching it.

Big Jim returns to his camp, where Larsen ambushes him, knocking him out and stealing some of his gold. However, he’s pretty quickly killed by an avalanche, while Jim has completely lost his memory from the low of a shovel. The Prospector, meanwhile, makes his way to a nearby boomtown, built with the profits from the rush in the Gold Rush.

In this boomtown, we meet Georgia (Georgia Hale), a popular dancer that works in a local dance hall. One of Georgia’s fellow dancers has gone off with a wealthy benefactor, leaving her behind. At the hall, she’s being pursued by Jack Cameron (Malcolm Waite), an aggressive lout who’s pestering her for a dance. And just then, who should walk in?

Georgia pretty clearly wants out of the dance hall life, and is also looking for somebody to take her away from this place. However, that somebody is CLEARLY not the Prospector, whom she completely ignores. But when Jack comes back around to force her into a dance, she decides to dance with the most undesirable person in the place instead: the Prospector.

So, while this act is borne of pure spite for Jack, it’s still a dance. It’s interrupted by a nearby dog, but Georgia enjoys the dance quite a bit, to her surprise. Jack is still after her, and the Prospector actually comes to defend her, standing in his way when he tries to pursue her. This, predictably, leads to a fight between the two, during which Jack accidentally gets knocked out by a clock, which the Prospector takes as his own actions, strolling off in pride.

The next morning, the Prospector essentially tricks a man into bringing him inside his cabin to get a free breakfast. This is Hank Curtis (Henry Bergman), who welcomes him into his home for food, and to take care of the cabin in his stead. Curtis owns a mine with his partner, and they head there, leaving the Prospector in his home. All the while, Big Jim is wandering through the wilderness, trying to remember where his gold is.

Georgia is out and about as well, having some fun with friends away from the dance hall. They run around in the snow, throwing snowballs at each other. And as this is right outside of the cabin, of course the Prospector gets hit by one of them. Feeling penitent, Georgia goes into his cabin, after he invites the girls in for a warm fire. She finds a picture of her from the dance hall underneath the Prospector’s pillow, which the other girls mock. But Georgia is at least a little sympathetic.

This pleasant moment is interrupted by one of the girls’ cigarettes lighting the Prospector’s shoes on fire, causing all of them to rush out of the cabin. However, before they leave, the Prospector asks if Georgia would like to come to dinner, which she assumes refers to all of the girls. Still, she accepts, which overjoys the lovelorn Prospector.

But the Prospector, of course, doesn’t exactly have a lot of money; that’s why he’s out here in the first place. So, he goes around town and does some work for money, such as snow-shoveling. He also blocks the jail door with a giant pile of snow in the process, which doesn’t make them very happy. BUT STILL, he gets anough money, and by the time New Years’ comes around, he’s got enough money for a nice meal and a well-made dinner for him and Georgia, with whom he’s head-over-heels in love.

Shame that Georgia doesn’t share that feeling, and has COMPLETELY forgotten about the entire occasion. And so, the Prospector waits for her to arrive, while she’s at a party at the dance hall. He imagines that the dance hall girls, Georgia included, have arrived and are having dinner with him. In the process of this imaginary dinner, he puts two forks in rolls of bread...and creates one of the most iconic scenes of the Silent Era of film.

But alas, this is all in a dream. The Prospector wakes up, and midnight’s passed. At the dance hall, the revelers celebrate, with Georgia standing on the bar and firing guns into the air in the process. The Prospector is saddened, now wondering where Georgia’s been, and realizing that he’s been stood up. Auld Lang Syne plays in the score, and the partiers sing it together at the dance hall.

And it’s FINALLY AT THIS POINT that Georgia remembers that she and the girls were supposed to meet the Prospector. They head there, with Jack in tow. But the Tramp (told you I’d slip eventually) has headed to the party at the dance hall, looking for the girls that stood him up, and he sadly gazes through the window.

Meanwhile, at the Prospector’s cabin, Georgia discovers the loving meal and decorations put out, and realizes that the Prospector actually took this far more seriously than she’d thought. She realizes his feelings, and what she’s done, and feels sorrow about it. Jack tries to get her to forget it and kiss him, but she angrily rebukes him for it, slapping him in the face. They leave the cabin, with Georgia reflecting on the scene.

The next day, Big Jim McKay is trying to recall the location of his gold reserve. He goes to town, and resolves that he must find the cabin in the wilderness, and he should be able to find his way back from there. The Prospector walks right past him, still mourning his spurned love from the previous night. But said spurned love is writing him a letter, noting that she is sorry for what she did last night, and asks someone to give it...to Jack. Oh. What the fuck, Georgia? But Jack, being the dick that he is, sees the Prospector in the dance hall, and gives him the note instead, which leads him to try and find Georgia.

In the process, though, he runs into Big Jim, who needs the Prospector to lead him back to the cabin. He promises to make him a millionaire if he does, and the Prospector agrees, going up to Georgia on the balcony and kissing her, promising to make good and come back rich! The two head back to the cabin, where they stay for the night.

But that night, a vicious blizzard once again rears its ugly head as the two sleep, and literally blows the cabin to...well, to a rather precarious spot.

So, in blissful ignorance, the Prospector gets up first, and walks around the cabin, causing it to rock back and forth as the weight shifts. Big Jim also wakes up, and together, the two realize that the house is balanced on the cliff’s edge, and shifts position as the weight shifts within. That leads to a humorous sequence with a tilting set, and the Prospector looks outside a door on the side of the cliff, dangling off of it for a moment before coming back in.

Now realizing the situation, the two manage to secure a guy rope that ties the house to rocks on the cliff. However, the cabin is now tilted, making their escape even more difficult.

However, Big Jim manages to get out with some teamwork, overlaid by The Flight of the Bumblebee in the score, and he also helps the Prospector escape, just before the whole house falls off the cliff.

But lucky day! The cabin blew RIGHT to the spot where Big Jim found the gold, and the two are now multi-millionaires! The film cuts to one year later, with the two very wealthy men, and the Prospector’s been able to afford everything he’s ever wanted...except for Georgia, whom he never found. Yeah, she definitely wasn’t looking to be with him. Geez.

The Prospector gets in his old Tramp getup for a photograph taken by the Press, while on the ship heading back to the lower 48. But then...who should also be on that ship but Georgia. The two unite once again, but Georgia’s overheard that there was a stowaway on board the ship, and assumes that it’s the Prospector. She tries to defend him, but quickly learns that he’s become a multi-millionaire. With that, the two are reunited, and the photographer brings both of them up for a picture. He poses them in a way that brings them quite close...and the two kiss.

The end! That’s The Gold Rush, and I thought it was a surprisingly heartfelt film! Really, it was funny in some spots, but was a bit more sweet to me than funny. And I really liked it, in truth. I get why it’s considered one of his best! I’ll elaborate on my thoughts more thoroughly in the review, though. See you there!

#the gold rush #the gold rush 1925 #charlie chaplin #the tramp #the lone prospector #mack swain #tom murray #malcolm waite #georgia hale #henry bergman #comedy april #user365 #365 movie challenge #365 movies 365 days #365 Days 365 Movies #365days365movies #365 movies a year

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weaselbeaselpants · 4 years

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That Krispy Cat: A Warning, part 3

The last of the images cause I don’t want this bitch on my computer anymore.

Knowing tumblr I kept the images hidden JUUUUST in case no one reads the fine print and can’t tell I’m being critical of this and gets me in trouble.

VVV ((Just in case you thought the JewishGriffon piece assured everyone that Crispy couldn’t POSSIBLY hate people of color, some of her earliest Nazi art had her character Klaus beating up Amigo Bear. She also made Amigo into a liberal strawman. )) VVV

((Dialogue to one of her TROLLARIOUS pictures that featured Amigo:

Amigo Bear: *muttering* "Your leader was a !@#$% little #@%^!@$^*!, you fascist feather duster..." General Klaus: "Fräulein, Ich vant you to cover your ears und shut your eyes as tight as you can." Crispy: "How come, General?" General Klaus: "Klaus ist about to say und do very bad sings zhat he does not vant his little Edelweiß to see or hear." Crispy: "Alrighty!" General Klaus: "WHO SAID ZHAT ABOUT DER FÜHRER? WER DIE FICK GESAGT? WHO'S ZUH SCHLEIMIG LITTLE COMMUNIST-SCHEISS SCHWANZLUTSCHER DOWN ZHERE, WHO JUST SIGNED HIS OWN DEATH VARRANT? NIEMAND?! GOTTVERDAMMT STALIN SAID IT! HERVORRAGEND! VHICH VUN OF YOU VANTS TO BE ZUH FIRST TO FIND OUT ZUH HARD VAY VHY MEIN FEINDE CALLED MIR DER BUTCHER BIRD?" ))

^^^ ((BUTOPHERARTISGOODSOYOUCAN’TCOMPLAIN

also the disc. for this pic before it was deleted had a ‘joke’ about cooking Jews in ovens. Oh and yes, that IS Hitler she’s giving that ugly ass cupcake too.))

^^^ (( - Thanks dA I never would have known I had a notifications unless eclipse blah -

This is one of her rants about how #Triggered she is that Starlight be compared to the Nazis when she runs a communist cult. Because A) that’s the real problem here and B) I too get upset when people say my OC is based on Jeffrey Dahmer when he’s so CLEARLY based on Ed Gein, Bwwwaaaah D> D> D> !)) ^^^

VVV ((Ugly art of her friend’s awful OCs.)) ^^^

VVV ((Crispy showing off why no one wants to be a patriot in our country.)) VVV

((FYI, Crisp, that attitude will make the Hamilton fans stronger so just keep that SJW-flinging coming you little SJW.

WHAT?! Social Justice is a broad term and as Crispy’s plainly demonstrated, you can circle it around and make a majority-class sound like the real underprivledged if you have enough fancy frou frou know-how and furries. Also, if a Social Justice Warrior constitutes someone who takes their cause soooo seriously that they’re annoying/petting/cruel/stupid about it....idk I think Crispy qualified.))

^^^ ((Crispy and her friend muse about what other races occupy the world of MLP in her headcanon. This, more than any other dA disc. and picture shows you her brand of “Segregationist-Nationalism is OKAY” thinking, cuz the art of these different races isn’t super offensive or cruel and neither are the characters. BUT if you scratch under the surface you’ll find that Crispy really likes these different people staying in their place and not in “someone else’s” country.

THEN, this same kind of thinking is used to convince you any mix of cultures is just cultural appropriation, again acting like she and her Nazi-stans are the only ones standing up to actual bigotry.)) VVV

^^^ ((Crispy makes the world a worse place by bringing up actual decent points; like how Americans dress Thanksgiving up as progressive and for the natives when we all know that’s not true...all to better her worldview.

fyi, GET OUT whenever you see a selfproclaimed Nazi fawn over Native Americans, because: Nazi Germany had a deep fascination with American Indians and used their struggles about their land being taken away from them to justify their eugenic genocide.)) ^^^

^^^ (( Crispy laughing it up on Furaffinity how she couldn’t be banned from her Furaffinity and then mysteriously never using her site there wowie.)) ^^^

^^^ (( Crispy complaining about SOPA cause her freedom of speech and blahblahblah.

Freedom of Speech is important. Unfortunately what people like Crispy don’t understand or care for is there’s no freedom of consequence. )) vvv

VVV ((LOL Joseph Mengele was such a stinkah let’s tell blithe jokes about him. At least WE AREN’T LIKE HIM!!!)) VVVV

VVV ((Early onset eugenic BS from her Spyro stuff that would be easy to miss if you didn’t know what this woman was talking about)) VVV

((Crispy admitting she thinks gays are pointless cuz they don’t reproduce but apparently loves them anyway. Also big shock Crispy’s seen Hetalia.)) VVV

VVV ((Crispy probably wanting Weeaboos to attack her cuz aren’t Japan’s animations so laaaaaaazy?!!?!? GUUdd think’ I’m a naziaboo! Germany’s never made any shitty animation evah. You know what, I lied. She doesn’t deserve Hetalia. She just doesn’t.)) VVVV

VVV ((Crispy dragging Brazil down with her as the apparent “Best South American Country”. Yikes.)) VVV

VVV ((More “it’s trolling ergo it’s not harmful” shit. Bulgarians probably do deserve their own Care Bears, but they certainly don’t want yours Crispy.)) VVV

VVV ((Disc. for her Richard Spencer bear art)) VVV

------

I know, I know...this isn’t what you wanted to read today, guys. I know it’s offensive and I’m sorry if it made you ill. I also know I’m putting my own blog under fire by showing these images here but I think that should say something about dA’s bad policies that this art gets a filter slapped on it and nothing more when the artist is blatantly pro-fascist.

Crispy resonates with me so much - and no it’s not cause I DARED to be “triggered”.

It’s because, for one, she was talented. I MEAN I HAVE EYES! That’s some nicely drawn digital stuff I’m not gonna deny. She had some cool rewrites and sequel ideas that, had it come from someone else I would have eaten up and faved to hell and back onceupona2012. But I didn’t, where a ton of MLP and furry fans did because they undervalued their own talents and would say “well it’s pretty who cares about the message?”

Unlike so many commercial+published artists, it’s REALLY hard to separate the art from the artist here because the artist is so connected and a part of her art and storytelling. If you fav her art, even if you didn’t like her, that was telling Crispy she’d won. It’s so defeating to have other artists say their gonna ignore their gut for the sake of prettypretty-Don-Bluth style art. And yes, that stigma DOES affect my view on 2D purists btw.

Crispy was so holier than thou’, and that attitude also was appealing to dA folks, not to mention her knowledge of art history by the time she dropped off the radar. Crispy was the kind of person who’d make long, detailed, justified rants against the design and color choices in Hazbin Hotel and then a bunch of antis would eat her redesigns up only to learn the awful truth later and embarrass themselves cuz they were so taken up by the craft they didn’t know they were reblogging a fucking Nazi.

Not to underplay Viv’s wrongdoings of course, but I’m sorry; the two aren’t comparable on the problematic artist meter. THAT’S HOW BAD CRISPY WAS.

If this somehow was just a faze and she’s come to her senses or doesn’t really think this shite she preaches...I don’t care. She said some vile shit and fuck no I’m not forgiving her. It’s like KenDraw or Shadman. You’ve changed your life around and realized you’ve done/drawn nasty shit that’s done real harm? Cool....I’m still not talking or ever promoting you, ya dingbat. You ain’t no Roman Polanski or Doug Tennaple. You’re a singular internet artist and any support of the project has to go to you - and you suck!

ThisCrispyKat was a wakeup call that showed me these people not only still exist but will be allowed to get away with it. I was very touchy bout this kind of thing back in the day. Fuck, I STILL AM TOUCHY. The rabbit holes I found thanks to Crispy opened up to reveal communities where people think my hair color’s going extinct. People would detail how much they wanted to rape me - a natural blonde - and kill my friends and family for not looking like me. That they want to jerk off in my naturally curly hair and see me in glowy German princess gowns preparing them dinner.

Crispy and other Nazistans would look at me; a blond-haired blue eyed Polish/German American woman and think I need to be “fixed” because I DARE to repeat propaganda that the Nazis were bad. They’d call me a traitor for thinking that celebrating the Nazi party ISN’T German pride.

HOW DARE YOU TELL ME THAT’S GERMAN PRIDE! I’LL SHOW YOU GERMAN PRIDE YOU EGOSTROKING-LIMPDICKED ATTENTION WHORES.

People like Crispy make it 1000x harder to actually show interest in German things. Because I AM interested in German shit btw.

Like for real: it’s a country I’d love to visit one day (at least the black forest, which is where my mom’s fam comes from). I love German art and German fairytales slap. I really do want to explore my heritage through art and stuff.

But guess what? Much as Crispy would argue to the contrary I DO know my WWII history and beyond and FUCK YOU if you honestly think jerking it to cuddly Nazi-furs is empowering or just “showing your interest in history”. Take your own advice and read a god-damn book.

TL;DR: I DO NOT have to be proud of Nazis to enjoy German culture and if you think otherwise, FUCK YOU. It’s a slap in the face to everyone even if you are ‘just trolling’ and it in no way values actual German’s feeling on the matter. It’s annoying how people undervalue real people just for the sake of fan art.

The Nazis were evil. They were racist, eugenic-genocidal idiots who killed over six million Jewish people, Romani, Slavs, Jehovahs Witnesses, disabled people, Poles, homosexuals and prisoners of war. They would have killed my dad’s side of the family if they were in Poland at the time. They made bullshit tanks that killed the people making them and didn’t work on the battlefield. Their leader was a fat, farting one-testicaled bastard who preferred animals to people.

They ruined everything for everyone and then took the easy way out, leaving the Germans that were left in the hands of the also-genocidal Soviets and Americans. Germany is still paying their war debts and now, 70-80 years later everyone else wants to laugh off this dark period of history with memes and forget what they did, and as such, are forgetting the victims of the genocide.

I have 0 tolerance for Nazi things for the sake of HUMANITY, let alone the individual groups they target. I don’t have to have German ancestry or know a single Jewish person to tell you any of this. It’s fucking history.

Eat shit.

#tw: nazi #tw: neonazi #tw: swastika #tw: antisemitism #cultural appropriation #kimba the white lion #thiscrispykat #altright #classic spyro #My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic #balto #animals of farthing wood

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wanderingsoul · 4 years

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questions to ask yourself before the new year except its february and we’re in a pandemic

what is one small way you can become a better person? for others? for yourself?

i can become a better person by addressing the trauma that i carry, and addressing it, and learning to cope with it better. i can be a better friend, parter, daughter and sister by leaning into the parts of myself that are broken and taking the time to pursue healing in meaningful ways. i can become a better person by taking responsibility for my growth and healing and actively work towards a more healed, wholesome version of myself.

what are you holding onto currently that is no longer serving you? why are you holding on? what’s one small step you can take towards releasing it?

i am holding on to the idea that i can fix those around me. being in a partnership/friendship with someone that openly expresses brokenness pulls on the need inside of me to fix things, and fix her. except thats not how people work, and thats not how healthy relationships work. i am holding on to this because for a long time, and sometimes i think to this day, i have been the glue for so many people. i am the common denominator, i am the steady, i am the savior. and being with alexa is a challenge because i have to be fully present, and wanting to support, with the very present knowledge that i can do absolutely nothing to make her feel better, and i might get my feelings hurt if i try.

goal for the new year that excites me? goal that scares me?

the goal that excites me the most this year is buying a house. it feels like another piece in the puzzle of the ever-elusive “perfect life”. having a house, two cats and a garden is a dream that i am so desperately hoping becomes a reality this year.

a goal that scares me is getting a therapist. i put it on my new years goals and here we are, almost march and i am no closer to reaching that goal. there are lots of things about therapy that are scary, being vulnerable mostly. and also the fear that i am going to open a can of worms that i can’t put back. and at the same time, i am afraid i am going to do the same thing i did last time - convince my therapist i was completely healed and didn’t need her help anymore to make her feel like she did a good job. probably one of the most toxic people pleasing i have ever done.... yikes. so this year, i want to be vulnerable and open with a therapist- and truly learn from them.

what do you want to be a student of in the new year?

i want to be the student of self-love this year. i feel like i have so much to learn from her, and truly so much to gain. as i am on this journey of ~weight loss~ healthy living i want to learn how to truly love myself- in all the forms that i take. one of the childhood and teen traumas that i carry around is self-loathing for my physical body, and extreme uncomfortableness i feel inside of her. my body was different than i thought it should be, and i never felt thin or pretty enough. even though looking back i could not have been any thinner without blowing away. as i try and lose some weight to get back to a healthy range, its so tempting to chase that skinniness that seems closer than ever now. i don’t ever want to think about my body in a good or bad way again, the same with food. i want it all to be neutral and purposeful. i don’t want body positivity, i just want body neutrality. i want to be comfortable and unbothered. i want to take pictures and look for the joy and not be hyperfocused on the rolls.

a quote that i am taking with me on this journey -

“what if you wake up some day, and you’re 65, or 75, and you never got your memoir or novel written, or you didn’t go swimming in warm pools and oceans all those years because your things were jiggly and you had a nice big comfortable tummy; or you were just so strung out on perfectionism and people-pleasing that you forgot to have a big juice creative life of imagination and radical silliness and staring off into space like when you were a kid? it’s going to break your heart. don’t let this happen.” - author unknown

who in your life deserves the biggest thank you for this year?

i am thankful for karl because of his understanding of me. i am thankful for mikaela for being a rock in my life and a cheerleader. i am thankful for silka because she offers more love than i know what to do with. i am thankful for alexa because she pushes me to be a better person. i am thankful for my mom, and her patience with me as i grow. i am thankful for my dad, and the hands-off role he has taken in my life. i am thankful for the friends that were patient and kind with me this year as i stayed away from most of them.

what can you thank yourself for this year?

i am thankful for the resiliency and grit it took to get through this year. feeling extremely burnt-out, from the pandemic, from social work and from life. managed to get a new job which is furthering my career in the healthcare field, managing to save a little money to buy a house. making it through the panic attacks and crying in the car at the thought of the losses in my life. thankfulness for the home that i have in myself, and the peace and safety i offer myself to be who i am and to encourage growth.

what have you outgrown this year?

i have outgrown pointless complaining. life is what you make it (to some degree) and i am choosing joy where i can and peace towards things i cannot affect.

what is an important boundary to set in the new year?

it is important to me this year to set emotional boundaries this year and create language to protect myself when i find myself trying to fix my partner and getting into old negative habits.

what’s a memory from this past year that makes you smile just thinking about it?

now this one’s a bit challenging because of the pandemic and social tension of this year, but i am choosing to focus on the personal good that happened in my life.

january- three way kiss with mariah and alexa. iceskating in CVS field with dalton. getting naked in the woods at taylors falls.

february - tall heights concert. drinks at cowboys with emily, alexa, sarah and meghan. raincloud and strawberry tattoos.

march - up/down bar with jaden and silka-getting mexican at 3am. cuddles on the couch with hippo while everyone was gone over spring break. drinking wine and looking at art at bethel. christian living on our couch- hiking afton. our neighbor mark gets his dog ella.

april- doordashing with knute- danny davito picture. staying with karl and mikaela for 3 weeks. getting drunk with jimu // garage door beer challenge. getting to ride on todd’s motorcycle.

may- seeing juneau for the first time. knute’s “just friends” instagram post. biking along st. croix with john. fishing with jaden at rapidan dam. lilac bushes blooming at the ranch. alexa’s graduation surprise. rollerblading... canoeing lake iduhapi with callie, sam, alexa and knute and smearing ourselves in charcoal. eating chinese and drinking wine for alexa’s birthday.

june- watching the dad’s try and fit our couch into the house. GFS- nightwatches, curfews. birthday bagels on the balcony. celebration at camp iduhapi. biking in northfield with jen. adopting juneau! bringing her everywhere with me. fathers day with john eating tacos. breonna taylor march. getting drenched walking around bdemakaska.

july- bee’s knees tattoo. cabin trip to barnum lake with alexa and jen. celebrating anthony’s birthday with alexa and erin (moving the gravestone). duluth trip with sam, knute and lea - jumping into lake superior. trip to padre island with john-getting way too burnt to function. chic fil a drivethrough with juneau.

august- camping trip with mikaela -attempt to get into canada and immediatly denied. murder mystery at emily’s house. rain on the patio for emily’s birthday. golden retriever puppies. dinner date with emma downtown minneapolis. annual brule trip- flipped the canoe.

september - alexa and i take a fake trip to ny. celebrating john’s birthday. visiting jeff’s farm. celebrating jen’s birthday in northfield. shooting pumpkins with jen. another trip up to barnum lake with karl, mikaela and seth. minnehaha trip with emma. jack’s apple farm trip.

october- camp trip, reffing football. making apple crisp. murder mystery night for sarah’s birthday. thrifting outdoor outlet with emma and lea. hanging with ozzy the cat. photoshoot with alexa and hippo. halloween party at caitlin’s house- being velma and daphne with alexa.

november - start working at bluestone. dinner at pub in minneapolis with jen where we die laughing. winning monopoly with callie and tyler. hiawatha hike with alexa. thanksgiving at silka’s.

december - giving the cats a bath. accidentally breaking into a cemetery with alexa. muffin’s christmas photoshoot. christmas at jens. sea world with molly, kody and kids, seth, john, k&m -forcing ourselves to watch blackfish the next day. tattoos! hammocking by the river. almost running into the elementary school on jimu’s dirtbike.

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years

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Survey #305

“you want me to be yours, well then you’ve got to be mine, & if you want a good girl, then goodbye”

Do you call the ice cream topping "jimmies" or "sprinkles"? They're "sprinkles" down here. What music are you listening to? Ha, I just turned on music before starting this. "Sex Metal Barbie" by In This Moment is on rn. If you go to school (HS or college) does your school have a rival? N/A Have you been baptized in any religious tradition? Yeah; I was born in a Roman Catholic family. My mom's mom would've probably had a heart attack if us kids weren't. At family gatherings, are you more likely to hang out with the younger or older relatives? I mean, I'd go for those my age or older, generally. I'd hang out with kids though if they wanted me to. Considering you current health, how long do you think you will live? With my CURRENT health, probably not even 80. Do you have anything in your room that would be 'weird' to others? Posters, yeah. Have you ever done geocaching? No, but it'd be cool if my body could actually handle taking a single goddamn step. What was the last game you won? Maybe Uno with my niece? I generally let her win, but occasionally I'm "lucky" to TRY to be more convincing, lol. I think she knows I let her, though. Do you know any deaf people? If so, is it easy or difficult to have conversations with them? No. Do you enjoy playing Monopoly? Why or why not? No, because I don't like board games, especially any that involve math. Is there a doorknocker on your front door? No. Do 'laugh tracks' on TV shows annoy you? They're so normal that I don't even notice them, really. Do people often mistake you for other ethnicities? If so, what do you usually get? No, I'm pretty obviously white. Has anyone famous ever attended your school? Who? I won't say his name for the sake of not connecting dots, but a well-known football player attended my high school. Have you ever had to attend an event that occurred on your birthday? Ha, my 16th birthday landed on the Super Bowl... I was at Jason's that night, and just to be "part of the family," we watched it with everyone else that came over. I was so bored and uninterested, but that's my own fault, really. I could have said something, but this was only a month into our relationship so I was too uncomfortable to speak up. What do you think makes a girl a slut? Do you believe that label is thrown around far more often than it should be? And finally, do you think it's unfair that mostly only women receive that label? I don't give a flying fuck how many people a girl is sexually involved with so long as she is safe and open and honest with her partners. I'm not a fan of the word and don't think anyone should be called it. Do you think it's bad to have sex at 15 or younger? I don't think it's smart, really. It's just too young to risk pregnancy. Yes, abortion is an option, but like... a 15 y/o girl should never be faced with that dilemma. I'ma be real tho, I don't think it's a "good" idea until you're at least 18, aaaand I don't know any non-virgin who waited that long. Just try your best to wait, ig. Favorite love song at the moment? Love songs never sit well with me anymore. I mean I can enjoy them, absolutely, I just... have a lot of bitterness. Trying to pick a favorite when you feel like that is like trying to pick the best-looking rotten apple of the bunch. Ever wondered what it would be like dating the same gender as you? I've done that already, and it was great but also scary in a massively homophobic state. Ever paid for sex? No. During thunderstorms, how does your pet react? Neither have a unique reaction; they're unfazed. What internet browser do you use? Google Chrome. Do you like eggnog? Noooo no no. How often do you see your mother? Every day, because I live with her. Do you like croutons in your salad? No, I really don't like the texture difference. Who did you last play truth or dare with? I don't know. Have you ever brewed your own mead, wine, beer or soda? No. Have you had to make any changes in your life lately? If so, what kind of changes? ugh What's the earliest popular thing you can remember from your childhood? Ummm. I mean, probably like Barney or Elmo? Do you prefer practicality or fashionability when it comes to clothes? Well, really neither. I'm the type that wears tank tops in snow, flipflops year-round, sweatpants in summer... so I don't really dress with practicality. I don't care what's "fashionable," so. Comfort pretty much reigns over my wardrobe. Which kinds of berries grow in the wild where you live? There are these little red ones that grow in little groups and somewhat resemble raspberries. I can't remember if they're edible, though... Oh, and muscadine grapes (I had to look up if they were berries lmao) can be found here, too. They're yummy. Beautyberries are another. Have you ever made an article of clothing yourself? If so, what was it? No. Do you go to arcades? If so, what's your go-to game at one? Even before Covid, I never really went to them. I enjoy them, though. I guess my favorite is maybe air hockey? When's the last time you had an alcoholic beverage? What was it? At the Cheesecake Factory for my birthday. It was some kind of sangria... Maybe strawberry and peach? Idr, but it was good. What has been the most enjoyable job you've had? You assume I've had a job I actually enjoyed. How about the least enjoyable job? Well, I barely lasted two hours in a dairy, soooo... When's the last time you had to carefully plan how you used your time? You're asking the wroooong person, 'cuz my life is never busy enough for that. Who do you usually say hello or good morning to first? My snake Venus, usually. Well, that is if her head is peeking out of her hide or is just fully out. Do you ever chat about your favorite video games with your friends? I don't really have gamer friends anymore, so not really. What do you hope you grow out of? Being so goddamn dependent. What movie made you cry the most? I can't say for sure considering it's easy for movies to make me cry, lmao. Maybe Titanic. What was one of the happiest moments of your childhood? Seeing a container of dog food in the far back behind the Christmas tree one year. It's how I learned I was finally gettinga dog (Teddy). What brings you the most joy in life? Probably my cat lmao. What's a hobby you would like to try out? I wanna get back into video editing, I just. Don't have the motivation for it anymore. As with most things. What sort of a kiss do you count as the first kiss? On the lips and with mutual intention. What was the last event you attended? Thanksgiving dinner at my sister's, ig. How about the last event you organized? Me? Organizing an event? What's the biggest insect you've ever seen? In the wild, probably like... a rhinocerous beetle or something. NO NO WAIT. I remember at least once in my life seeing a fucking GINORMOUS moth on the ground one morning. I don't know what kind it was, but jc it was huge. How about the biggest spider? Oh yikes, I'll never forget this: an orb weaver wandering across the floor of our childhood van and under the passenger's seat. Never saw it again. I was afraid to let my feet stay on the floor for a looong time, haha. What's something you'd never ever dare to ask another person? I'd never ask certain "why" questions, like "why did you get an abortion?" or something like that. I can think of valid situations to ask most things, even controversial matters, but no one should ever have to justify something like that. "Why don't you have kids?" is another. That one gets to me. Having children is not an advancement or milestone in everyone's life, and hell, you never know if the woman's had like five miscarriages or something. What's something you've always wanted to ask someone but haven't dared? Why Mom didn't raise her eldest daughter, at least for her whole life. Katie's childhood is a big mystery to me, and I want to know more, but I know the topic is very upsetting to Mom, so I'm not about to make her explain it. What's the worst/best thing you've done without your parents knowing? Saying "worst/best" makes this question confusing... but I'm guessing you mean the best thing to me that they wouldn't have approved of? I really didn't do a lot of things that would fit that description. I can only think of a certain intimate occasion where things happened where they probably shouldn't have. If you wear earrings, what does your favorite pair look like? Ugh, I don't because of the holes being too stretched out from wearing heavy earrings too long. I still haven't gotten to putting proper gauges in so it looks less stupid. Have you ever won any money from a scratch card? Maybe like, $10 or something. How about a slot machine? I've never played one. Do like playing bingo? Sure, it's all right. What small, everyday thing makes you really happy? Cuddling with my cat. Do you enjoy puzzle games? If so, which one's your favorite? Yeah, I do. I can't really pick a favorite, though... Is there a substance you avoid at all costs? If so, what is it and why? I think in a past survey I mentioned my aversion to beer because of the association it has with my dad. I'd never be able to get a sip down. Not that I really want to anyway though, it stinks. What you would you absolutely hate living next door to? Any really busy location or travel hubs, like a train station. My childhood home was near a railroad track, and it sucked, so I can only imagine a station. What would you love to live next door to? A waterfall, uggghhhh. In the woods too to hear plenty of frogs and toads and crickets... What gives you nostalgia? It is very easy to make me nostalgic. The littlest things can do it. Hearing about/seeing/playing childhood video games, like Spyro, is a biggie. Which reminds me how damn badly I wanna play the Reignited trilogy, fuck. I just don't have the proper console. Which language do you think is the most complicated to learn? Well English is supposedly the hardest objectively, but as a native English speaker, I can't say anything about that. In my experience, Latin was like fucking impossible. Is there a place that you might call your second home? I guess Dad's house, but it's not like I'm there a lot. I feel comfortable there, though. How do you imagine your later life to look like? I DO NOT want to think about this. I fucking dread the thought. What is a job you would never in a million years want to do? A butcher. There is absolutely no motherfucking way I ever could do it, even if it kept me off the streets. What's the weirdest building in your city? *shrug* How do you keep in touch with friends usually? Facebook. Do you recognize friends'/family's vehicles by sound? Not anymore. Dad had an old car that was very easy to recognize with its shitty muffler, but he hasn't had that car in years upon years. I used to be able to recognize Jason's old car too because of sound, but primarily because he drove way too fast down our path that when I heard a car zooming over rocks, I knew it was him. What's something new you've just recently learned? It was actually a topic of recent discussion that I may have high-functioning Asperger's. Very, very unusual to learn later in life, but apparently Mom's seen the warning signs in some things since childhood, like my extreme pickiness with textures, my tendency to knead and play with my hands in situations of discomfort, my social ineptitude, hyperfixations, it actually running in our family (which I didn't know beforehand), among a lot of other things. We're not really digging into it though because it just doesn't matter; there's obviously no magic treatment for autism, and me being in therapy and having a psychiatrist to handle my meds is enough. If you were in Harry Potter, which house would you be in? Apparently I'm on the Hufflepuff/Gryffindor line when I took a survey a long time ago. Are you nagged about being on the computer too much? Not anymore, at least on the average day. Mom's accepted it by now. Dad's joked about it before though and I know others have certain opinions about it. Based on your personality, what animal do you think you'd be? Maybe a deer. Shy, reclusive, and always on alert. Have you ever been in a hot tub? Yeah. What song is stuck in your head at the moment? I have "my boy" by Billie Eilish on right now because it's stuck in my head. What's your father's middle name? John. What's the last movie you saw in theaters? Yikes, good question. I think it was The Lion King remake. Have you ever vandalized? No. What's a pet you've always wanted? Most pets I want I've had at some point or another... I guess I'll say a ferret, though I've really only wanted one in concept. I could never keep up with their maintenance, but by god they are the cutest fucking things ever. Do you like mice? I love mice! What's your favorite t-shirt? My "equal in our bones" Cloak shirt. :''') The design is so beautiful and just my style in general, plus I live to support anything Fischfuck takes part in. Did you/will you get a car for your 16th birthday? I'm 25 and still have never had my own car lmaoooo. What's your favorite tomato variety? I generally don't like tomatoes themselves, but rather products made with them, like ketchup. If I'm in the mood though, I do like tomato sandwiches with mayo and bacon; I only ever enjoyed them though if they were fresh right from an old friend's garden. Which well-known person's death shocked you the most, if any? I think Chester Bennington's was the biggest surprise. Rest easy, you legend. What's the craziest color you'd dye your hair? More like what crazy color WOULDN'T I dye it... What was the longest train ride you've been on? I've never been on one. What's the coolest hobby one of your friends has? uhhhhh idk Have you ever played in a stack of hay bales? No. If you could learn any skill, which would you like to learn? Ha, cooking. How do you like your steak? Medium well.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''my boy'' by billie eilish

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sea-salted-wolverine · 4 years

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Okay so last week was a shitkicker and was literally so bad I spent the better part of the week trying to delude myself into thinking it was a good day. Like, we're talking, "the sun is shining and I'm here to see it so today is a good day" and "I'm having a bad day- fuck me I am not haveing a bad day- I'm having a good day- I'm not having a bad day". Denial is a powerful tool for mental health, apply judiciously. I get that everyone on earth is kinda having a shitty year but it feels like things just kinda escalated in my little corner

The 7th had a huge snow storm that brought traffic to a stand still. No one could leave the house and university class was online anyway. Batshit customer demanded to pick up her gear anyway. I drove in because I was the only person with keys to the shop that could get to the building. It took me a solid 2 hours going 15mph on the highway. The snow in the parking lot was up past the fenders of my truck. Crazy lady gets 10 out of 18 of her survival suits back but the other 8 still have holes in them because our only repair tech is also the only one who answers the phone or runs the computer or handles customers or cleans or disinfects anything or stores gear. I'll give you one guess who that person is.

Did you guess me? Good for you. Fun fact this was not the case in October.

Crazy lady swans off through the snowed in parking lot and because she cant find the exit, blasts straight through the ditch and onto the road.

I say fuck it and leave. I've been at work for 2 hours. I have made 24 dollars for my trouble. It takes me another hour to get home.

The 8th is Saturday and I'm supposed to be at work. No one can drive. There was another 10 8nches of snow last night. I say fuck work and go to dig out the plow truck. The canopy over the plow truck collapses as I walk out to clear the snow of it.

I do not scream.

My partner and I get the truck running and go plow people out of their driveways and then go do the shop.

We come back home and the heater doesn't work. We just spent most of last week frantically trying to limp the thing along because no heat at -20°F is in a word fucking unpleasant. At least now its 40 degrees warmer because if the snowstorm. We take it apart again. The house smells like diesel. The house smells like exhaust. The house is not cold because the wood stove can keep up at 20 above zero but it won't keep us through the winter.

There is no saving the oil heater. We need a new one.

Its 730 and neither of us have eaten. I start rice in the pressure cooker so I can throw a tasty bite on top and call it dinner and that dies too. Explosively.

Dinner is half cooked rice and microwaved curry.

Sunday is spent finding a way to stretch our increasingly thin budget to buy a new heater. Between us we actually have 2275$ and we will still cover the mortgage. Somehow. All our Christmas gifts will be hand made this year. The next thing that breaks will stay broken.

Monday, power outages due to snow storm. No wifi, no zoom meetings. Another 8 inches of snow. This is now more snow than my city gets for the full year.

My boss calls sobbing. The dog died. Joey, an 11 year old, 130lb mastiff with a tumor the size of a football on his liver has been her constant companion for at least 8 years. The pandemic has confused the bejesus out of him because while he loves the lock down and going out to play every hour or so he doesnt really like the concept of strangers in masks. Hes a guard dog and doesnt understand that men in masks coming into the shop are not here to kill mom they're wearing masks so they don't kill mom.

Mondays the shop is closed anyway and I spend it installing the new heater. It doesn't quite fit in the space the old heater came out of but its warm.

Tuesday, I go to work, everyone cancels class, I once again gently explain to a regular that eugenics is bad. I would like to curse him out. I cant. He drops a grand on scuba gear and leaves, talking about how great his trip to Mexico will be.

I do not scream.

A friend calls to ask how I'm doing. Not great. Yea, her niether. She asks if I want to go out to the backcountry with her over the weekend. I explain that my leg physically does not move and I'm downing copious amounts of advil to remain upright. The doctor sent me in for an MRI but has not yet called back. Plus I'm supposed to go to Valdez for the weekend and actually go diving. That I can do with limited use of my leg.

She says yikes, take it easy, take care of yourself, I love you.

I say, yikes, I'm tired of taking it easy, I wanna play, I love you too.

Hit me up if your plans open up and we can do something gentle on your leg. She says.

God yes. The cold woods away from people sounds like paradise. I dont even care that it will cause me rending physical pain to get there. I need a break.

Its Wednesday. I go to school. I get pulled over. Miraculously I dont get a ticket. I'm white female and conventionaly attractive, maybe not so miraculous. I rolled through a stop sign but I'm pretty sure I couldn't afford a ticket.

I get a text in class. One of the instructors who works with the dive shop has tested positive for covid. I haven't seen the man in 2 months. I needed a spare instructor but he was nowhere to be found. But hey, evidently that's a good thing.

I go to work. I vacillate between doing the job a 4 people and having nothing to do.

I go to the grocery store because I misjudged my last monthly grocery run and even though I'm increasing my exposure I'm out of cheese and tea damnit.

The store is packed. Pandemic who?

My partner and I haven't had a date nite in a while and this week has been shitty. I want a nice dinner. I pick up a couple boxes of the carton sushi which isnt terrible and is about as nice as I can justify on the new budget. I grab a gallon of milk and a few other things. I forgot my wallet in the truck and the cashier is chill and sets my stuff aside while I grab it.

I pay and take my stuff home and realize I left one of my bags at the store. No cheese or tea for me.

Thursday. 10am my phone goes off with an emergency alert. The govoner has grown a spine in light of recent elections and is instituting a voluntary lock down. My state has 500 new cases a day. That might not sound like a lot but theres only 300,000 people in Alaska and we've got poor medical infrastructure.

Unfortunately Alaska is full of Alaskans and nobody can tell us what to do. Nothing changes. 7pm rolls around and I'm teaching scuba classes in the pool.

I load a few hundred pounds of scuba gear into the back of my truck. In a wet wetsuit. In the snow. In a fabric facemask. 6 feet apart. In the pool.

I dont get paid for pool time.

Over the summer we had 6 dive masters including me, all big burly dudes, much better suited to picking things up. Its November and I'm the only one.

The kids I'm teaching are going to Hawaii. They're 10 and 13 and so wildly excited about breathing underwater its beautiful to watch. And they're traveling to an island. In a pandemic.

Friday.

Unload scuba gear so it doesnt get stolen out of the back of my truck while I'm at class. Were doing a make up lab today. Hey of the five student in my class only one of us has covid so theres that.

My boss calls an let's me know that shes left for Valdez without me. If I'd like to make an 8 hour drive by myself in a snowstorm I'm welcome to follow.

I'm in class till an hour before shop closing. I'm not driving across town so I can run on the open sign for half an hour.

The shop stays closed on Friday.

Saturday.

I explained to everyone we had business with that the shop would be closed over the weekend and Friday. I planned on being in Valdez. Hell I canceled plans to be in Valdez.

I open the shop and immediately field calls about why we werent open. I start to explain about the Valdez trip and logistical difficulties and then I realize that shes not mad about that. The woman was here before I opened early this morning. We have never been open that early. The hours are on the door.

A regular comes in. Hes also confused as to why I'm here.

Sunday finds me curled up in bed, reluctant to leave. Getting out of bed has not played out well for me recently.

A friend comes over to chat with my partner about specialist rifle parts. This isnt that wierd, he works at a gun shop and they've been discussing upgrading my partners current rifle set up.

He is wearing a full Scottish kilt. Red tartan. Looks very lovely.

I make zucchini bread and my proportions are a little off because I have too much zucchini so it's a little over moist but it's good. I'm recovering from an asskicker of a week and next week will be better.

Monday morning:

Baby brother has covid

Dads getting the results of his rapid test tonight.

Mom isnt getting tested because she says she doesnt have symptoms but that's not the fucking point mom.

So, I'm not going home for thanksgiving. I'm not diving in Valdez. I'm not skiing backcountry.

I'm not sick. I'm not flat broke yet. I dont have a ticket. I have a job. I have people who care about me. Im managing my physical and mental health as best I can. Im just fucking exhausted.

#vent post #writing #holy fuuuuuck #2020

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