#and the interactions between Matt and Frank were good

[twilight-deviant]

But why was the writing so bad?

[feelmyskinonyourskin]

Judex, Judicum, Infantem - Chapter 3

(Eventual)Reader x Matt Murdock x Frank Castle

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gif by me (tumblr is making gifs that i upload extra potato quality lately and I'm not happy about it at all)

summary: You're feeling lighter and freer now that you and Matt are seeing each other, only to have it all come crashing down when Frank strolls back into your life. When you go to tell him you're pregnant, it doesn't go as planned.

warnings: SMUT/18+ (don’t interact if your age is not in your bio or I will block you!) AFAB Reader. No use of Y/N. Mention of pregnancy. Fingering, unprotected P in V. Pet names. Angst.

a/n: This is gonna be the last chapter with the flashback parts, so thanks for sticking through it if that style was confusing!

w/c: 2,940

Still a few weeks earlier

It was far too comfortable in your bed to even think of opening your eyes, let alone getting up and starting your day. The glow of the light streaming in from the morning sun was warm against your skin and encouraged you to burrow further under your plush duvet. The way Matt’s fingers also sleepily danced at the waistband of your panties while he lazily kissed at your neck and pressed his body against your back didn’t help you to fight the urge to stay in this blissful state of near slumber all day.

“Come on sweetheart, let me in. Just a little bit before I have to go.”

His voice was husky. Still shaking off the sleep as he cooed in your ear between haphazardly placed presses of his lips to the skin where your collar bone met your neck.

You couldn’t help but grin, rolling your leg so that your knee bent towards the ceiling, allowing his gentle hands to easily access you.

“Matty.” you cooed in a whispered plea

“Shhh”

You arched your back as he finally swiped a finger through your already drenched core, still leaking the mix of yours and his fluids left from just hours before.

In the few days since you and Matt had gone out, things heated up quickly. You’d woken up with him in your bed three nights this week and any notions of keeping things casual and taking it slowly had gone out the window. At least sexually, that was. You still were holding him at an arm's length emotionally and you were sure he’d complain about it if he weren’t so busy spending so much time between your legs making you both feel good.

Preening at his touch, you softly whined when he inserted two fingers into your heat, loving the way they scissored and explored inside you.

Fuck, he was so good at this. Using his heightened senses to read every clue your body gave and bring you to levels of pleasure you couldn’t have fathomed were possible.

It was a slow climb this morning, each of you allowing hands to explore sleepily for a long time. Eventually, he had you flat on your back, nestled comfortably between your thighs as he gingerly pumped into you. He moved as if there was no rush, no world outside that needed your attention, despite the impending threat of each of your morning alarms and the responsibilities of the day that awaited. Just the two of you and the warm glow of morning.

It was pure ecstasy when you reached your peak, shuddering under the weight of him as your heat contracted in slow steady pulses in a drawn out orgasm. He moaned into your mouth as he felt you clench around him, so wishing this could be the only way he needed to spend his day, but also chasing his own release, spilling inside you unable to resist giving into how good you felt fully anymore.

A satisfied hum escaped his lips as he collapsed on top of you, nestling into the crook of your neck while you stroked his back.

You were so content in the moment. Happy to hold him close and revel in the bliss of it all.

Until his phone beeped out, his morning alarm cutting through the rosy haze you were both in.

Still, the two of you remained snuggly as you prepared for the day, unwilling to be away from each other’s touch for too long.

“You know, we could try that Indonesian place down in Chelsea that Mahoney always raves about.” Matt said, sipping at his coffee while you packed up your bag for the day

“I can’t tonight Matty, I have the gala, remember?”

“Oh shoot, that’s right.”

You didn’t think it was possible for him to be any more handsome, but his still kiss bitten lips cracking into a groggy smile as he stood in the morning glow in your kitchen certainly had you considering calling off for the day and dragging him back to bed.

“You know, I could go with you. As your date? I shouldn’t be in court past five tonight if you want some help charming those donors.”

“Thank you for the offer Matt, but I think showing up with you to a work event when we’ve been going out for less than a week feels very much like putting a label on this. Which I thought we were trying to avoid.”

You could tell from the way Matt ran his tongue along his teeth that he was not thrilled with your continued stance on the state of your relationship. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to be seen in public with him, actually quite the opposite. God, how you’d love to know what it was like to be his truly and fully; to show up to the gala and let the world know that someone thought you were special. Worthy of being with. Not just someone but Matt. You could feel yourself already falling faster and harder than you’d ever planned. In fact most days, Frank was just a whisper of a name that echoed in the back of your thoughts. But you knew if you let yourself jump head first into this, whatever was still lingering in your heart about Frank would inevitably bubble up to the surface and ruin things. Plus, you expected Matt to eventually grow bored of you, a handsome and successful lawyer like himself had plenty of options. You were sure he’d find someone better than you eventually. Best not to let yourself fall too hard and end up hurt again.

You also couldn’t deny the disappointment you felt at losing the opportunity to see Matt all dressed up for a black tie event; knowing he’d probably spend the entire evening schmoozing and charming you and showing off.

“If it makes you feel any better,” you deflected, trying to defuse his mood “I also really do not want to hear it from Colleen if I show up with you on my arm. She tries to set me up with every even moderately hot dude we see because she thinks I’m too lonely or something and I just do not want her to even have a smidgen of notion that she’s right.

“Fair. Honestly, I don’t want to hear it from her either.”

Matt put his coffee mug in your sink before making his way to you and giving you a quick kiss.

“Maybe you can make it up to me though, let me cook for you at my place on Friday?”

“Mmm you cook?”

“I do.”

“You any good?”

Matt scoffed at your question, letting his eyes roll as he playfully smirked and drew you into his arms.

“I haven’t ever heard any complaints.”

“Yeah? What are you gonna make for me?”

“I have a shrimp scampi recipe that’s my go to. You’re gonna love it, sweetheart.”

“I like shrimp scampi.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. It’s a date.”

The gala was a great time, even without Matt’s presence. You were exhausted though when you finally walked through the door of your apartment shortly after midnight. Wasting no time, you kicked off your shoes and changed into something comfortable. Just as you were about to shut off all the lights and head to bed, you heard a thud come from your fire escape.

You had joked with Matt earlier about Daredevil one day maybe making an appearance late in the night, but with him being vague about his stance as a vigilante lately, you didn’t think he’d actually commit to the joke.

With a roll of your eyes, you made your way to the window, unlocking it and tugging it open.

You weren’t expecting to see Frank standing there instead.

“Jesus! Frank, what are you doing here?”

“Sorry sweetheart, didn’t mean to scare you.”

The tender way his eyes scanned you nearly had you crumpling to your knees. Frank always looked tired, but right now, only bathed in the light of the city and hastily shoving his hands in his coat pocket, did you realize how broken he looked. As you took in the sight of him before you, all the feelings you’d been pushing to the side in the days since you’d seen him last came flooding in. A burning welled in your eyes and the lump in your throat only grew by the second.

A week and a half was not a long time to go without hearing from Frank usually. But this was different. Things had shifted between the two of you after that night.

The way your gaze tore down and away from him broke his resolve, coming to stand before you in one large stride and leaning into the window sill to gently take your face in his hand.

He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t bring himself to. Instead he kissed you fiercely, not like the heated and desperate kisses you shared last time, but soft and full of yearning. As if he was trying to throw every apology he couldn’t back up with true action into his kisses.

It didn’t take long to get you inside. He didn’t bother to break his lips away from yours as the two of you bumped around your dim apartment until he found your bedroom.

The measured way he undressed you and laid you down consumed you with an understanding; this was his goodbye. His 11 o’clock number in the story that was the two of you. Not unprepared by the heat of the moment like last time and the awkwardness that followed, but carefully planned to take you apart and put you back together as a parting gift.

But still, you allowed it all to happen. To let the car crash just to stand in the glow of the flames to keep yourself warm, if only temporarily.

Frank’s skin was heated as he pressed his bare chest against yours, clinging to your skin in a desperate attempt to keep you as close as physically possible. He shuddered softly and nuzzled his carved nose into the dip of your collar bone, gently tugging at your thigh to pull your leg up as he pushed inside you slowly.

“Fuckin’ Christ, baby.”

All you could do was whimper quietly and hold on while he made love to you, trying so hard to enjoy the moment and not overthink.

And as the two of you laid there in the mellow afterglow and you dozed off in his arms, limbs still tangled together and covered in a light sheen of sweat, you let yourself finally hope.

Maybe he’ll stay.

But when you woke up, still in a daze of pleasure, the cold sheets beside you let you know; Frank was gone.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Now

The abandoned warehouse smelled mustier than usual thanks to all the rain that had fallen on New York this past weekend. It made you sad to think that this is how Frank lived, only surviving in cold, barely habitable hideouts, only eating canned food and plotting his next hit. You made your way through the echoing hall, bobbing and weaving through the doors and tunnels as you navigated. After your last encounter, you were certain you’d never see him again.

Now things were different.

Matt handled the information that Frank was the other potential father to your child shockingly well. You knew many a conversation needed to happen about how you all wanted to proceed further, as well as you finally getting the full story on their history. Matt agreed to let you have the space to tell Frank the news on your own though. You were tempted to text or call him but knew it would all go unanswered anyway. So, you came here to tell him in person.

You finally reached the door you were seeking, covered in chipped paint and rust from years of neglect. Trying your hardest not to startle him, you knocked just loud enough so that he could hear you.

“Frank?”

No answer.

Just in case Frank was hiding in a corner with a weapon or something, you gingerly turned the handle and poked your head in slowly so he had plenty of time to see it was you.

But the room was too dark to see anything. When you flipped on the light switch, you swore you heard the sound of your heart dropping.

The cold concrete room was mostly empty. Free of all Frank’s gear; his carefully organized supply of guns and amo, his stockpiled perishable grocery supply, the ratty mattress on the floor. All gone. All that remained were a few shelves and lockers; cleaned of all the things that once sat in them, and the worn metal desk; which had on top of it only one thing.

Frank’s old Marine sweatshirt.

It wasn’t odd for Frank to move locations from time to time. You tried to calm yourself with this information and stop from jumping to the worst case scenario as you reached in your back pocket and retrieved your phone.

You only had the number of his latest burner. The calling tone only rang out once before there were three beeps and a robotic voice spoke.

“We’re sorry, but the number you are trying to reach has been disconnected.”

It was as if a landmine went off in your heart, sending splatters of veins and ventricles into every direction of the cinder block cave. All at once it felt as if the room was spinning and your knees wobbled. You picked the neatly folded clothing article off the desk and held it close as you choked out a sob and crumpled to the floor.

Frank was gone. No note. No way of contacting him or finding him. Just gone.

And you were pregnant. And there was a very good chance the baby was his.

And you loved him.

Your heaving cries stopped just as suddenly as they started when you heard footsteps behind you. They were slow and clearly being intentionally loud enough for you to hear.

“Frank?!” you cried out, whipping your head around to see him enter the abandoned hideout.

But Frank was not standing there, ready to pick you up off the floor and comfort you.

Matt’s lips pursed in a grimace as he crossed the room toward you, tightly gripping his cane. His expression read of pity for sure, but also with an air of “I told you so and I really wished I would have been wrong” to it. It took him little effort to lift you off the floor and pull you into his strong embrace as your tears flowed once more.

“You said you were going to let me do this alone.” you coughed out

“I know. But I was waiting just down the hall, listening. I needed to hear how this went. To make sure you were okay.”

“Frank wouldn’t have hurt me.”

“I know, sweetheart. But I didn’t trust him to not be an asshole.”

“Well it doesn’t matter anyway. He’s gone.”

“I know.”

Another wave of tears washed over you. You breathed out Matt’s name out in a plead, decibels below a whisper so that only he would ever hear. His lips came to press softly into your hair as he comforted you. Nuzzling into his strong hand as he cupped your face, he reassured you over and over.

“Shh. It’s okay. It’s going to be okay.”

Running his fingers along your cheek to wipe away the tears, Matt pressed his forehead to yours as he heard your breathing finally begin to even out.

“I’m not going anywhere. I promise. You and I. Well do this together.”

“What if it’s Franks?”

“I don’t care. I don’t.”

“I can’t hear your heartbeat but I know you’re lying.”

“I’m not. You and this baby; I’m going to love you both and we’ll be a family. We don’t need Frank to complicate that.”

Love

The word sent an icy dagger into your heart. Could he? Could you ever? You took a step back, wiping the last of the salty droplets from your cheeks.

“You sure you don’t want a paternity test?”

The chuckle Matt released reverberated in the echoing space. He shook his head, moistening his perfectly pouty lips before speaking again.

“I’m sure.”

“I thought a lawyer would be smarter than that.” you said with an attempt at a smile, albeit a melancholic one

“You know sweetheart, my dad died when I was young. He made a stupid decision and left me all alone. And my mom wasn’t in my life, well not in the way I needed her. But that’s even more complicated...”

It shocked you a little bit that Matt Murdock had not always been a charming, smart-mouthed, successful lawyer; but at one time had actually been a scared little boy who had been hurt by the world. The way he tilted his head up in the dim fluorescent light as he swallowed thickly, recounting his family history, made you wonder how much there was to his story and if he’d be willing to tell you sometime.

“Anyway, they both chose to leave me in their own ways. I didn’t have them there when I needed them most. And I promise you right now, I will not repeat their mistakes. I will not let this child; our child, feel abandoned.”

The way he said ‘our child’ lit a glimmer of hope inside you like seeing a lighthouse through a storm. Matt’s earnest sincerity made you actually believe him, if only a little bit.

“Okay. We’ll do this together.”

TAG LIST: @xxdrixx @a-leg-without-fear @echo-ethe @capswife @xoxabs88xox @allmyn1ghts @laaadygisbooornex3 @ninacotte @uncertified-doc @moth-murdock @danzer8705 @endofthelinegang @buckyssugarchick @hellskitchenswhore @pixviee @themikkapika @bisexualbith @labellapeaky @theoraekenslover @sexyvixen7 @tanyaherondale @marysucks-blog @0callme-mim @aesthetic0cherryblossom @livewaspsblog

[joybabyjune]

Jealousy

Pairing: Frank Castle x fem!reader (Matt Murdock has a tiny role too)

Summery: You’ve been casually sleeping with Frank for a while now, but you decide you need something more stable and go on a date with Matt (who you don’t know is Daredevil). Frank shows up on your date to show you who you belong to (maybe in a public bathroom 🙊) and to show Matt to back off 😈.

Warnings: Explicit (minors dni!!!), semi public, unprotected piv, oral (m receiving), little bit of praise kink (good girl, attagirl), little bit of degradation kink (slut, whore), dirty talk, tiny bit of exhibition kink, sort of cuckolding Matt. Think that’s it, feel free to let me know if I missed anything!

Author’s note: This idea was stuck in my head for so long and I finally finished it! I hope you guys like it. I would love to hear what you guys think, so reading notes will make me happy! And if you really like it, please reblog so others can enjoy as well. You’ll make my day and it’s completely freeee.

Disclaimer: English is not my first language ✌🏼

Masterlist

You’re sipping on your second beer while you chat and laugh with Matt. After working together for over a year now, he finally asked you out.

Matt is a good guy. He’s everything you should want in a man. Reliable, kind, not a murderer on the run for law enforcement that most people think is dead... You mentally kick yourself for thinking about Frank while on a date with Matt. There’s no future with Frank. You shouldn’t want him. You need someone more stable in your life, someone like Matt.

“You okey?” Matt asks sensing your mind is elsewhere.

“Eh.. Yeah, yeah, I’m sorry. You were saying?” You ask, shaking your head as if you’re shaking the thoughts of Frank from your brain.

“That this new client is really gonna make a difference for Nelson and Murdock..” He continues talking, but your mind drifts again while you look around the cozy, dark bar at all the people who decided to get drinks tonight. There’s a few couples, a group of co workers who look like came straight from their office jobs, a few middle aged men at the bar that you feel safe to assume are regulars and then your heart stops for a second as you see him.

Frank Castle is sitting at a table by the window, sipping on a beer. Your eyes widen when you make eye contact and he nods at you as a way of saying hello. You wave back almost nervously. How is he out here in public?

“Want another beer?” Matt asks, bringing your attention back to him.

“Eh, y-yeah, thanks.” You say. You’re so glad that your date is blind and didn’t see your interaction with the criminal he told you to watch out for.

What you don’t know is that Matt has already sensed Frank from the moment he entered the bar. He has been noticing his smell on you for the past months as well and it doesn’t sit right with him. It’s part of the reason he asked you out tonight, to get your attention away from the other man.

You grab your phone while Matt orders your drinks and hold it up to Frank to show that you’re gonna text him.

You: What are you doing here? What if anyone recognizes you?

Frank: Don’t you worry about me, sweetheart.

Frank: Saw you go in here with that lawyer guy..

You frown at your phone. Is he.. Jealous? It’s the first time you’re on a date since you started seeing him, but you didn’t think he would mind. It’s all been pretty casual between the two of you.

Frank: Looks like a date..

You look at him and he raises his eyebrows to urge you to answer him.

You: It is.. Matt is a good guy. He would be good for me. Reliable, available..

You look at him and see him scoff as he reads your text. You know it was a low blow. The only reason Frank is away most of the time, is to make the city a saver place.

Frank: Yeah? That what you want? A good Christian boy?

You: Yes.

You lie and Frank knows it. You should want a guy like Matt. Matt you could bring to Thanksgiving dinner with your parents and your mom would, for once, not be disappointed in you.. But you and Frank both know you like the danger and excitement of your little arrangement way too much. For months now, Frank comes to your apartment on a regular basis. You have amazingly intense and kinky sex and have the best conversations while eating takeout afterwards. Sometimes he stays the night and sometimes he leaves while you fall asleep, but either way you’re left alone until the next time he has a night to spare.

Frank: So full of shit.

Matt comes back with your drinks before you can write a reply, but you scowl at Frank.

“Thanks.” You say taking the drink from him and smiling extra brightly, to convince Frank you’re having fun.

“Sorry it took so long, was very busy at the bar.” He says, holding his glass up to toast with you.

“Oh don’t worry about it.” You say as you touch his glass with yours before you glance at your phone.

Frank: Did you let him fuck you?

You: Not yet..

You look over at him and he scoffs again as he reads your message

Frank: Think he can fuck you like I can?

You gasp when you read it and you see Matt frown. “Something wrong?” He asks.

“N-no.. Just need to go to the bathroom for a second.” You say. “Excuse me.”

You don’t go to the bathroom. You walk straight to Frank and sit down next to him. “What the hell, Frank.” You hiss.

He just looks at you. “Tell me.” He finally urges. “Think he’ll fuck you like I can? Cause I don’t think he can.”

“Oh please.” You scoff. “Think very highly of yourself, Castle. I think Matt will manage just fine.”

He laughs dryly. “Just fine, huh.” He says. “Think I do just fine? Well I remember that differently, sweetheart. I remember you begging, crying out my name, barely being able to walk..”

“Stop that, Frank.” You hiss through your teeth. “I’m trying to give this thing with Matt a chance. I need something more serious in my life than just some good dick every once in a while, okey.”

“Oh now I’m just some good dick, hm.” He chuckles through his nose and looks to the side before looking at you again and licking his lips. He places his hand on your bare thigh, right at the edge of your dress. “You look good. Got all dressed up for your little date, huh.”

Your breath hitches at his touch. And your stupid body reacts instantly to his. “Y-yes..” You say.

“Got something pretty underneath it too?” He asks, fingers toying with the hem of your dress.

You swallow thickly. “No..” You say honestly.

“No?” He asks in disbelieve, knowing what you have in your collection.

“No, I’m not wearing anything.” You say smiling teasingly. “Felt like doing something risky for my date.” You like to make him jealous. It feels good to know that he wants you and doesn’t want another man to touch you.

He growls a little. “You gonna let him get under this dress tonight?” He asks.

“I might..” You say.

He grips your thigh tightly and leans in so his mouth is at your ear. “Let me remind you first..” He says. “Of what you’ll be missing if you do that.” His lips connect to your neck and he slides the tip of his tongue over your pulse.

“Frank..” You whimper, you brain clouding over. Why does he have to have this effect on you?

“Bathroom.” He rasps. “Now.”

Your eyes widen and you look at Matt. He looks unfazed as he drinks his beer, his back towards you. You know this bathroom. It’s beat down, broken lights and mirrors, graffiti everywhere and it has multiple stalls, so there’s no way you can get away with this without anyone noticing. “I can’t, Frank..” You sigh.

“I said. Now.” He says. You almost moan at his demand and get up. “Attagirl..” He says as you walk toward the bathroom, your feet moving on their own accord.

You can sense him following you closely. He pushes you into the bathroom and slams you with your back against the door to barricade it before crashing his lips on yours.

He lifts you up and you wrap your legs around him. Your dress hitches up to your hips and you moan in his mouth as he rolls his hips into your, basically bare, core. “Hmhmm.” He hums and he breaks the kiss. “That’s what you need, huh?”

“Frankie..” You whine a little, but you know he’s right. “But-“

“Shh shh shh.. No buts.” He says and lifts your dress up more so it bundles at your waist. You feel your naked folds against the rough material of his jeans and you moan loudly. He snakes one hand between your bodies and slides his fingers through your soaking slit. “Fuck..” He mutters to himself. “That for me or for lawyer guy out there?”

“Y-you, Frank.. You..” You say, your voice breathy, as he starts rubbing circles on your clit.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” He grunts. “Pretending to be a good girl, but you’re just a little slut for me..”

“Frankie..” You moan, sounding desperate, but you know he’s right. “Please..”

“Hm? What’s that?” He rasps against your throat. As he presses on your clit harder.

“Oh fuck..” You pant. “Frank, p-please.. Need more..”

“Oh yeah? That slutty hole needs to be filled?” He asks. “Why don’t I get Murdock to do that for you, huh? ‘M sure he can help you out.”

“N-no!” You gasp and grab onto his shoulders desperately.. “Need you, Frank.. Need your cock.. P-please!”

He growls and mutters something under his breath while unbuttoning his pants. You can barely hear it but it sounds like. “Hear that, Red.” You frown but get pulled out of your thoughts by Frank slamming his cock inside you without warning.

“Oh my.. Fuck!!” You cry out, fingers digging into his shoulders. You keep forgetting how big he is.

He growls loudly. “That’s it, take it..” He says as he starts thrusting right away, not giving you any time to get used to the intrusion. “Tight fucking pussy.. So wet for me.”

There’s a knock on the bathroom door that you can barely register. “Taken!” Frank rasps loudly, giving you a particularly hard thrust that makes you cry out loudly.

“Y-you’re so bad..” You whine. “T-they can hear us.” You add in a whisper.

“Let them..” He says. “Let them hear what a whore you are for this cock. That you let me steal you away from your date and fuck you in a public bathroom.. ‘S because you belong to me, hmm?”

“Frankie..” You whine.

“Right?” He growls through gritted teeth.

He’s never been this harsh, but you’ve also never been this aroused and you can feel your orgasm building up fast. When you don’t answer him, he pulls out. “Nooo, don’t stop!”

“Say it..” He growls and rubs the head of his cock against your clit.

“Ohhh.. I-I’m yours, Frankie! P-please!” You moan.

“That’s right. Mine.” He growls as he sinks back inside you.

Your eyes roll back in your head and he starts fucking you with deep, hard strokes. “I-I’m gonna cum..” You pant into his shoulder. “Please don’t stop..”

“Good girl, cum on my fucking cock.” He rasps, never losing his rhythm.

You cry out when you explode around him and immediately know that no man can ever top this. You’re addicted to Frank Castle, even with all the hassle that comes with him. “Fuckkkk!”

“That’s it, attagirl.. Can feel you squeezing me..” Frank talks you through it.

“Oh my god..” You pant as you come down from your high.

“Think I’ll send you back to your date with me dripping down your legs, hm, how ‘bout that?”

“Noo! Please don’t!” You chuckle.

“No?” He asks shaking his head with a smirk on his face. “Better get on your knees then.” He adds and he pulls out.

He lets you down and you quickly get on your knees. You don’t care about how dirty the floor is, you need this right now.

His cock, wet from your juices, glistens in the dimmed lighting as he holds it in front of your face. He’s rock hard, the veins are pulsing and his balls look heavy. He’s definitely close.

You ‘open up’ when he tells you to and he slides in as deep as he can until you gag. “That’s it.. Attagirl..” He mutters and he slowly starts thrusting into your welcoming mouth, one of his hands resting comfortably on the back of your head, the other pushing the door closed above you. “Look at me..” He orders and your eyes shoot up to his. “Gonna make sure that if that fucker tries to kiss you, that he knows you belong to another man. Cause this fucking mouth’s mine too, hear me?” He growls, speeding up his thrusts and making you gag again.

You make some sounds to agree with him, not being able to talk. “Fuck.. Gonna give you my cum.. Fill up that pretty mouth..” He groans loudly and his hips stutter while you feel his load land on the back of your tongue.

You gently suck his softening cock to get every last drop before letting him slip out and swallowing the proof.

“Fuck you..” You sigh as you rest your head back against the door.

He chuckles silently. “That good, hm?”

“Shut up..” You smile lazily.

“Still think he can give it to you like that?” He asks as he tucks himself back into his pants.

“No.. Don’t think anyone can, Frank..” You say honestly. “And I hate you for it. You ruined me..”

“Should have warned you for that.” He says smiling down at you smugly. “Gonna get up?”

“‘F you give me a hand.” You say and he helps you get up on your shaking legs.

“Fucking Frank.” You curse as you look in the mirror. Your hair is messy, your makeup messed up and your dress is all wrinkled.

He chuckles. “Go end this date, I’ll be waiting in your room for round two.” He says slapping your ass and leaving you in the bathroom to freshen up.

“Thank you for your patience.” You hear him say to someone on the other side of the door.

Your eyes widen and you pull your dress down just quick enough for two women around your age to walk in.

“‘M s-sorry..” You mutter without looking at them. They don’t say anything, just disappear into the stalls.

You quickly try to salvage what you can and hurry back to your table.

“I-I’m sorry, Matt.” You say sitting down.

“You okey? You were gone for a while.” He asks.

“Ehm.. N-no, I don’t feel so well. Think it’s best if I go home.” You say as you put on your jacket and grab your purse.

“You sure?” He asks, frowning a little, and you get the feeling the question is about more than just you going home.

“Yes, I’m sorry.”

“Shall I walk with you?”

“No, that’s okey. I’ll eh, I’ll see you tomorrow at the office.”

“Alright.” He says looking a little disappointed.

“Bye.” You say, hugging him and hurrying home.

To Frank, once again.

[bellaxgiornata]

First, I want to wish you ( a little bit late however) a happy birthday!!! 🎂 🎂🥳🥳🎉🎉

I was busy and was only reading on your ao3 account, just got here and realized!

You are one of the two accounts that made me do a profile last September or October ( I don't remember exactly which one of these two months it was). I hope you're having an amazing pregnancy ( are you having nausea, did you have it already and it passed on the next stage or did you not have this effect? 👀, if you don't feel comfortable answering, that's totally fine, I understand) and I hope your hubby gives you princess/queen treatment like you deserve! 😌✨

Could I ask you how you post on tumblr? I want to post things like pictures or blurbs, but I have no idea how.

Do you also have tips on organizing time? I have a lot on my plate between uni stuff, looking for scholarships/opportunities and trying to have a life, that I have no stability and am very stressed.

To conclude this, I wonder how would traveling abroad on another continent be with either Matt or with Frank?

I definitely imagine that with Frank it'll be really nice. He'll always have everything planned and I see him informing himself as much as he could with knowledge to the max. He'll bring reader to museums or historical places. However, he could sometimes be paranoid or really almost always on alert. He's definitely a bodyguard boyfriend!

With Matt, I think I'll be hard on the way to go there ( either by plane or boat, it will be really noisy for him) . He could also be always stressed since he won't be able to understand the language spoken and might misinterpret things as threats. :( I don't see how reader and him could have a great time together...

What do you think?

Ahh thank you, friend! 💖 My birthday was actually back in October, but this celebration is sort of like a tumblr birthday! I've been here for just over a year now and it seems like a good cause for celebration! And I'm glad to hear I could play a role in you coming over here to tumblr as well! It's definitely fun being able to interact a lot more than on AO3!

Thankfully most of this pregnancy has gone pretty well in comparison to my previous with my first son. That one took place during COVID so it was isolating and I had 24/7 nausea and sickness. This pregnancy has had its issues, but thankfully everything has been working out in the end. I've only had a bit of nausea in the first trimester and then it comes and goes lately now, but honestly I'm just forever exhausted and uncomfortable being almost 36 weeks along now. And my husband is doing his best! We've got a toddler so this time around it's not always do-able to have quite that level of treatment, but he's very helpful and attentive!

For the rest of your questions, I'll answer them below the cut! Because this is quickly becoming long 😆

It's generally pretty easy to post on tumblr, whether you use mobile or a PC. There's usually a button somewhere that says create or something along those lines. And there's options to just write text or add in images or make polls, etc. If you sort of play around you should be able to see the different things you can do! You can always test out a post and see what it does and then delete it afterwards, too! I was a bit confused when I came here at first, but just playing around with everything had me realizing that it's pretty straightforward for most things!

As for tips on organizing time, I can share what helped me during the busiest phase of my life in my late 20s. I was in grad school for a couple of years while also running a wedding photography business while also planning my own wedding and trying to maintain my own social life and sanity. So I get the stress! What I found helpful was using some sort of calendar or organizer. I wrote down deadlines for things that were non-negotiable so that I could visibly see what was going on--days I needed to go photograph a wedding, days wedding photos were due to couples, when homework was due, what days exams were, or when projects/papers were due for grad school. Things like that that cannot be changed. Then I usually plotted out time to allot to each thing throughout the week and prioritized each one depending how long it would take/how soon I needed it finished. So I made sure I had time to work on editing photos every day to keep making progress on weddings (because I usually had a new one piling up more work about every weekend), and I usually allotted so much time throughout the week to work on schoolwork (because I was reading well over a thousand pages a week every semester). I felt like having the visual of a calendar allowed me to actually see where my time was being spent and how much time I actually had to get things done. And it made things feel a little less overwhelming and like I was more in control. And any extra free time outside of getting my work done was reserved for wedding planning of my own or doing something fun with friends or my now husband.

So for you, I'd say plot out when school things/homework/exams are due, when scholarships are due, and what days you have work (if you have to go into work). Then try to allot how much time you would need to get everything done and plan that into your days every week. Some weeks you may find that you don't have a lot of social time (I know I certainly didn't and that's rough), but unfortunately that comes with going to college. Unless you're like one of my friends who somehow skipped every class, winged every assignment, went out always partying, and somehow still got her degree. Still baffles me to this day... But generally, school is going to take up a lot of your time until you finish it. It's rough and I feel for you though ❤ Just make sure to take some mental breaks and don't overwork yourself. Allow yourself to say no to things you don't actually need to do as well.

Now onto the bit about Matt and Frank abroad!! And of course, these are just my thoughts on how I picture the two of them.

I do think of the two, Frank would be easier to actually travel with just for the fact that he wouldn't need as much accommodation since he does not have Matt's heightened senses or a disability, which would obviously add a layer into planning that a Reader/significant other would have to keep in mind when planning things with Matt. But to me personally, I still think experiencing traveling abroad with either man would be a fun experience for different reasons and I don't think Matt's need for extra accommodation would ultimately have a negative effect on a vacation, especially because I imagine he'd travel with a partner who makes him feel comfortable with who he is as a blind man dealing with the extra sensory input. Personally I think experiencing anything through Matt's senses with the way he 'sees' the world would fascinate me because I don't experience the world even close to the way he does.

That being said, with Frank I could see him having some things planned out, and in my mind I picture it being from his time spent in the military. He seemed to spend quite a few years in the service, which means he's done multiple tours to many different places worldwide, even if that means just passing through a country. But I'm sure he's visited a couple of interesting places on his own when he had free moments, whether alone or with his buddies, and I could picture him having a few places in mind he'd want to show Reader. But I could also see him having places in mind that he had heard about but never had the opportunity or time to go visit while he was abroad in the past because the military tends to keep you busy. So I'm sure there's places Frank would love to really explore. I could also see him being interested in the historical places, having read up on something that really stood out to him, but I could definitely see him interested in adventuring outdoors if Reader/his significant other was open to that. He definitely seems like he'd want to get out and explore the scenery and the sights and he probably wouldn't want to sit and relax too much on a vacation. And I agree, he'd have times where he'd absolutely be on alert. I think that's just how Frank is wired at this point, especially with loved ones.

As for traveling abroad with Matt, the actual getting to a different destination would be rough on him. Though we know in the MCU he's traveled to LA now because of his appearance in She Hulk, so canonically he's managed what I think is around a six hour flight. And from a brief check, it seems New York to certain cities within Europe would be a little bit longer of a flight by an hour or so. So, I think he could manage it, but I think it would be vastly unenjoyable because of his senses. And he'd absolutely need to accommodate for those. I also imagine he'd need time to decompress and recover after a flight like that before getting out and enjoying the vacation. Though I do think he'd have fun exploring restaurants and finding really great food to try, and I think he'd enjoy experiencing museums or art galleries whether there was a guided tour set in place for someone who is blind or visually impaired, or whether he got to experience things through Reader's descriptions. I think he'd still like to explore the city and visit historical sites, but I think Matt would really enjoy experiencing places that are probably a little less overrun with tourists and people that might overwhelm his senses. But also, getting Matt to stop being Daredevil for a bit and actually leave Hell's Kitchen might be hard 😆

[starkclear]

Tension

Summary : You and Frank had been distant friends for a bit. You met him through your friends Matt, Karen and Foggy. You had a habit of bringing them lunch every day to eat together. This time, you only found Frank.

Warnings : smut

Words : 3339

P.S : You can read this as a oneshot but if you want more here are the other parts.

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

You had taken the habit of bringing Matt, Foggy and Karen lunch every day. It helped you maintain the close friendship you had. However, since they took on the Frank Castle case, they didn't have much time on their hands which meant that the lunches were briefer and Frank also started joining you. You and your friends had most definitely felt the slight tension that had built over the last few weeks during which Frank had joined your lunches.

After the first day, you started bringing him lunch as well. You had lifted the box toxards him hesitantly and looked up at him, an eyebrow raised. He looked down at you for a moment, looked down at the box and then back up at you again. He slowly took the box and thanked you. You held eye contact for a few seconds before he then turned to sit down and started eating. You let out a small breath to compose yourself before sitting next to Karen. You couldn't help but feel a heavy gaze on you but refused to acknowledge it.

That's how most of your interactions went after that. You could always feel your heart speeding up under his gaze and your throat drying up at his low gravelly voice. You could tell Matt was catching on by the little smirk he gave whenever you interacted and you figured he could probably hear your heartbeat picking up every time you looked at Frank. You wanted to threaten him for him to keep this to himself but that would just confirm the petty crush you had.

You often sat across from him and had a perfect view of him, legs spread as he enjoyed your food. He would compliment it every time, giving you a shoulder squeeze to thank you. You would simply smile up at him and nod, not knowing how else to react as you felt your skin light up where he touched you. You wanted his rough fingers to slide down your arm and then up again to finally wrap around your throat. You could just tell how easy it would be for him to do whatever he wanted with you especially with the size difference.

But you tried your best to shove all of those sinful thoughts deep down and get over it. You were sure you didn't imagine the tension but you knew it would complicate everything and your thoughts were confirmed when Karen took you aside one day and confronted you after the lunch was done and Matt, Foggy and Frank went back to work.

"Do you have a crush on Frank ?", she asked.

You blushed at the bluntness of her question and slightly opened your mouth, trying to buy some time to think of a clever answer. She looked at you with a bored expression on her face, clearly already not buying anything you were going to say. You sighed.

"I wouldn't call it a crush", you said, going to the desk and gathering all the empty lunch boxes. She followed you with her eyes and waited, arms crossed, "It's just, like, physical attraction, you know ?"

You were trying to minimize the effect the man had on you but were not doing a very good job. She could also tell by the way you were avoiding eye contact. You heard her sigh as you put all the boxes in your bag and finally looked up at her.

"Nothing's going to happen, okay ? It'll pass as soon as you're done with the case and he's gone.", you reassured her. You technically weren't lying. Nothing would happen and once he's gone, you wouldn't get these feelings anymore. Right ?

She looked at you for a few seconds before nodding, "Fine. Just try to stay away, alright ? A distraction is the last thing he needs right now."

You smiled at her and nodded even though you felt your heart sink with embarrassement.

After that, you tried to avoid any kind of contact between you and Frank as much as possible. It was hard considering you already had a limited amount of contact but you did your best. You wouldn't look him in the eyes and you would put his box on the desk in front of him. You tried to leave before he could touch your shoulder or thank you with his seductive voice.

However, you realized that Karen's speech acually made you want him even more. You couldn't stop thinking about him, imagining how his hands would feel, how his lips would feel. You could imagine his strong arms holding you up against the wall while you made out or his firm hands leaving red marks on your ass. You touched yourself thinking about him at night but it never truly soothed the ache that you felt. You needed him.

But you also didn't want to disappoint your friends and jeopardize the whole case by distracting him. So you finally took the decision to completely ice him out. It was best for everyone involved since you weren't sure about your self-control when you gave into your thoughts about him.

The next day, you prepared the food as usual and as you left your apartment, you took a quick breath and nodded, ready to face whatever was going to happen.

But as you entered the office, you noticed it was empty. You frowned and looked around, surprised that your friends weren't here and even more surprised that they didn't text you to let you know lunch was cancelled. You called out for them, looking around before deciding to go home. It was clearly a sign that you shouldn't be in the same space as Frank yet and for that you were somewhat grateful.

You grabbed the doorknob and opened the door when you heard the voice you both dreaded and couldn't wait to hear again.

"Hey. They had to leave to pick up some files at the Bulletin."

You closed your eyes tightly before letting go of the doorknob and turning around.

"Hi.", you said, your voice weak. You looked up into his dark eyes and smiled. He huffed and gave a nod, the corner of his lips turning up.

"You still want to eat ?"

"Um, yeah of course.", you answered, grabbing the first lunchbox and giving it to him as you both made your way to the desk.

You sat down behind the desk while he took the chair in front so you were facing each other. You both started eating in silence and you couldn't help but stare at his lips as he chewed on his food.

"This is fucking delicious.", he said, nearly shoving all of it down his throat. You smiled, pleased by his comment.

"Thanks."

"So, why do you even cook like this every day ?", he asked, his eyes on you. You blushed under his gaze and looked down.

"Well, the guys and I don't really have time to meet up so it's easier this way and since I love cooking..." you trailed off, looking back up at him. He had finished his food and was just looking at you, leaning back on his chair, his eyes intense.

"That's nice of you.", he said slowly, his eyes trailing down your face and to your neck.

Your chewing slowed down and you looked at him for a second before reminding yourself of your conversation with Karen and continuing to eat. You finished and took both boxes, putting them in your bag.

"Well I better get going then.", you said, smiling at him. He kept his gaze on you, taking a few seconds before nodding.

"I guess you should.", he just said, getting up at the same time as you.

You left the other three boxes on the desk and grabbed your bag, swinging it over your shoulder before making your way to the door. As you reached the door you turned around.

"Okay well, I'll see you tomorrow.", you said, smiling politely before turning around.

As you turned around, you felt a hand grab your elbow, forcing you to look back at him. He stepped closer to you, forcing you against the door.

"Am I imagining things or do you have a problem with me ?", he asked. You looked up at him, eyes opened wide.

"No ! Not at all !", you stuttered, now feeling the heat of his body seeping through your clothes and heating up your skin, "I just-"

You stopped. You didn't know what to tell him.

As you looked up at him and felt his breath on your face, you couldn't help yourself and leaned up, closing your eyes as you pressed a kiss to his lips. It was a short kiss that you deeply regretted instantly but you still loved the way his soft lips fit against yours. You felt heat build up between your legs.

You closed your eyes and sighed, your head dropping.

"I'm sorry.", you just said.

You then felt his right hand come under your chin, lifting your head for you to look at him. You looked into his eyes as he leaned down, his lips pressing onto yours. He controlled the kiss perfectly, his hands coming to your waist. You let out a surprised moan, your hands coming up to rest on the back of his neck.

It was surprisingly soft for all the tension that was released into the kiss. He pressed you into the door as your lips fit together. He bit your bottom lip before licking it. You moaned, leaning further into him. You broke from the kiss, your whole body feeling like it caught on fire.

"Frank-", before you could finish he slid his hands behind your thighs, lifting you up and turning around. You brought your mouth to his neck, leaving a trail of sloppy kisses and occasionally sucking. You sucked harder on a certain spot, leaving a blooming bruise.

He put you on the desk, grabbing your shirt and ripping it open. You had worn your favourite button up shirt today and you were between sad and turned on at the action. He leaned down, placing kisses on both of your breasts before sliding your bra under them. He brought his mouth to a nipple, licking and sucking, and used his thumb to play with the other.

You gasped and closed your eyes, your hand coming up to rest on his head. You moaned softly as you felt his rough tongue flicking your nipple expertly before he kissed up to your neck, sucking on it. You couldn't stop the light gasps and moans leaving your mouth, finally feeling satisfied after a month of teasing.

His hand came to the button of your trousers, unbuttoning it before sliding his hand in.

"You're already so wet.", he said, his impossibly low voice even lower.

"I've been thinking about this this since we met.", you admitted. You locked eyes with him as he smirked and started playing with your clit.

"Yeah ?"

You nodded and closed your eyes, your head dropping to his shoulder as he took the slick from your hole and slowly built up the pressure in your lower gut by rubbing circles on your clit.

"Fuck, Frank.", you moaned. All you could think about was him inside of you, "Please, fuck me."

He grunted and nodded, his hand slipping out of your trousers. As he started undressing, you stared at every inch of his skin that he was exposing to you and felt the spit building up in your throat. If your mouth were opened, you'd be drooling. The perfectly scultped abs that adorned his stomach complimented his broad shoulders and thick thighs and you couldn't take your eyes off.

He smirked up at you and muttered a small "come here" before sliding your trousers down your legs after you got off the desk. You took them off completely before he led you to the couch that was against the wall. He motioned for you to lay down on the couch before placing himself on top of you.

He started kissing you again and you felt like you could burst. The feeling of his skin against yours was heating you up inside and out and you had never felt emptier in your whole life. You reached down during the kiss, sliding your hand against him. You rubbed up and down, feeling him getting harder.

He leaned back, effectively stopping the kiss before he started kissing and licking down your body. As he arrived to your panties, he slid them to the side and you heard him mumble a low "fuck" before he licked up your slit.

You gasped, your back arching as you grabbed onto the couch. He licked up to your clit, his tongue expertly playing with it. He sucked on it and started flicking his tongue. He was doing it just the right way and you once again felt a small pressure build up in your gut.

He slid a finger inside of you which made you grab his shoulder and moan louder. He worked his finger in and out slowly, without much resistance since you had been touching yourself regularly in the past month and continued flicking your clit with his tongue.

That sweet buildup was getting stronger with each stroke and you could feel it reaching the point where it would spread throughout your body. You grabbed harder onto him, moaning his name. As you got ready to reach your climax, he stopped, kissing up your stomach to your lips and smiled at you. You pouted up at him, disappointed in the orgasm denial.

"Not yet, darling." he just said and you were sure you melted into the couch at that. You blushed and looked away before he put his hand on your cheek, forcing you to face him. He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to your lips which made you smile into it. You slid your hand up to his neck as you returned the kiss.

You felt movement and felt him line himself up with you as you kept kissing. You brought you knees up for better access and stopped kissing him as he slowly slid into you. He pressed his forehead onto yours, your eyes closed and mouth slightly opened.

You loved the slight burn that he caused as he entered you and savoured all of it. He moaned, eyes closed, gripping the couch hard. As you opened your eyes and looked up into his, you gave him a small nod which prompted him to start thrusting slowly in and out of you.

You let out sighs and moans as you finally felt the itch you had felt during weeks being scratched. Feeling how well he filled you made you crave even more and you used your legs to push his hips deeper. He took the hint and started thrusting harder, a grunt leaving his lips occasionally as he built up the rhythm.

He moaned your name, his thrusts finally hitting the perfect spot in you. You grabbed harder onto him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and bringing him down, allowing him to put his forehead on your shoulder.

The more he slid in and out of you, the harder he went and you could feel how unstable the couch was but you just couldn't give a shit right now.

He attached his mouth to your neck, sucking on a spot and leaving a dark bruise. You moaned louder, feeling the sensation you were robbed of a few minutes ago coming back. You brought your feet to the couch and pushed your hips up slightly to meet his.

"Frank, I'm so close.", you whispered in his ear. He nodded and moaned, "me too."

He leaned up and grabbed the back of your knees, bringing them up and looking into your eyes before he started thrusting again. You closed your eyes, throwing your head back against the couch as he hit deeper than before due to the new position.

He entered and exited you so easily, as if you fit perfectly together. He was able to hit all the right spots and you felt the contrast between the previous overwhelming emptiness you had felt over the past month and the fact that you had never felt so full.

You felt tears build up in the corner of your eyes, the orgasm that was building up being probably the strongest you had ever had.

"Where- Where should I.. ?" he trailed off, a trickle of sweat dripping down his temple.

"Inside.", you answered and that seemed to drive him crazier as he groaned and his hips faltered.

You were on the edge when you felt his cum filling you entirely and it drove you to follow him in his state of bliss. You moaned his name so loud you were sure even Foggy and Karen could hear you. He kept thrusting as you both rode out your orgasms and slowed down as you started catching your breaths.

"Shit.", you said, your chest heaving up and down and you heard him huff out a laugh as if in agreement. He stopped thrusting entirely and paused, taking some time to control his breathing.

He slid out of you slowly and you let out a soft gasp as you felt his cum starting to drip down so you quickly brought your hand down and put it back inside you with a finger.

"I think what we did to this couch is filthy enough, no need to add to it."

He laughed and nodded, distracted by the view of his cum filling you up. He got up and grabbed some tissues, helping you clean up as much as possible but you could still feel it trying to drip out and had to clench as much as possible.

You slipped your panties back in place and watched as he gathered your clothes and gave them to you. He put on his boxers that had been discarded before he entered you and left the room. You looked curiously as you slipped your trousers on and put your bra on properly.

He came back with a hoodie and smiled apologetically at you.

"Sorry about that." he said and handed you the hoodie. You chuckled and took it while thanking him. As you slipped it on you couldn't help but take a deep breath as his smell overtook your senses. He smiled at you and came closer, he slid the zipper up before wrapping his arm around your waist.

"It looks good on you." he said and you smiled up at him. You leaned up to press a kiss to his lips which he reciprocated. You closed your eyes, your hand going to the side of his face. You kissed a bit before a realization came to you.

"They're gonna kill us." you said, your foreheads pressed together. He nodded while you both chuckled.

"Yeah, but it was worth it."

You looked up at him and pretended to think about it before smiling up at him and nodding, "Definitely."

As you shared one last kiss, he collected his clothes and got dressed while you opened the windows and tried to clean up all the buttons that flew off your shirt. After a few minutes, you figured you got them all and grabbed your shirt, putting all of it in your bag.

"Well I better go before they come back." you said, looking up at him. He had slipped on his t-shirt that showed off his body so deliciously.

"Okay." he said, giving you a final kiss, "Can I come over to your house tonight ? To chat for a bit ?" he asked, and you figured he was hinting at chatting about your relationship so you nodded. You gave him your address before slipping out of the office.

You couldn't help but smile all the way home. Even though you had gotten what you had craved for a month, you felt like this could be more than just a one time thing.

[frankenhookersmonster]

fictober day five - praise

warnings - 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, smut x afab!reader (p in v, oral - both recieving), praise

word count - 814

fictober masterlist - masterlist

twitter - ko-fi

got something to say? a request or concept? speak!!!

a/n - all of my boys in the same place. also i’m probably gonna extend that steve blurb into a full fic i can’t help myself

Frank loves to praise you. You’re good for him, maybe one of the only really good things in his life, and he makes sure to tell you that. Some nights you’d cook for him, it wasn’t all of the time and you were a busy person, but sometimes when you felt like it you’d make a nice dinner for him. It would be late, too, when he got home, and he’d find you in the kitchen plating a meal for the two of you. Even if you weren’t the best cook or if the things you made were repetitive, he always appreciated it and never complained. “Looks amazing, sweetheart.” You wouldn’t even notice him as he snuck behind you, snaking an arm around you and kissing your scalp. “Bet it’s delicious, love it when you cook for me.”

He’d thank you thoroughly, through dinner and again after, when you were naked underneath him. “You’re always so good to me.” He was fucking you fast, hitting the deepest points inside of you, and he knew that you couldn’t say much apart from your blubbering and whining, so Frank did most of the talking. “I don’t deserve you, fuck baby. Ain’t no one like you.”

Matt likes to get you flustered. When you were first starting to date, he tested the waters, saw what made you stutter. From his research he realized that encouragement made you extremely sheepish. It was always little things, like when you’d come home from work with a promotion, he held your hand and practically whispered “I’m so proud of you.” You’d smile, mumble a thank you and scratch your head. He could feel how fast your heart was beating and how warm your skin was. 

He’s a dominant guy, and he loves it when you’re on your knees for him. Matt’s hand on your cheek, swearing he can feel the bulge of his cock through the skin. You were moaning against it, trying to take it deeper into your throat. “That’s it, you’ve got it.” Ever so gently, Matt pushed your head closer to him, thumb still rubbing your face as a tear fell down. “Good job. Gonna make me cum, you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” You wanted to nod, instead just letting out a sigh that shook him a bit, his grip on the back of your neck tightened. “Almost there, angel. There we go.”

Eddie was used to being the one who was praised in your relationship. He did a lot for you, gave you rides, brought you coffee, massaged your back when you asked. “Thank you, baby. You’re too good to me.” You’d kiss his cheek, something that would always make him blush. So when you did nice things for him, like when you washed the pajamas he left at your house. They were waiting for him on your bed after he took a shower, and the best part of it all was that they smelled exactly like you. “You wash my clothes?” He asked, though he knew the answer, you just nodded, not even looking up from your book. He crawled across the couch, resting his hands on your knees and kissing them quickly. “Thank you, I appreciate it. And I appreciate you.”

He’d be deep in your cunt and still tell you how much he appreciated you. In between kisses, sucks, and licks would be words of affirmation. “You treat me so well, you know that? Good god.” His words would send a shiver up your spine, and though you’d try to squeeze him he’d pry your thighs apart with his hands. “Letting me taste this perfect pussy, I must be the luckiest man in the world.”

Steve didn’t even pick up on your reaction to his compliments. You started working at family video at the request of Robin, and maybe that harbored crush from high school on Steve Harrington came to light again. Some nights it would just be the two of you closing, and being so late and completely empty of people, you would take it upon yourself to put back some tapes that had been returned. You were still new on the job, and even though it took you a little bit longer than it should have, you were still proud of yourself. “Good job, you did good.” Steve said, hardly noticing your embassesment until you silently walked away from him, not even looking back.

He’d take you in the backroom, maybe after some pining and tension, and fuck your brains out. Steve’s pace would be steady, careful to keep you comfortable in the disorganized break room. “Thank you, shit, thank you.” He’d kiss your shoulder blades, taking short breaks to hiss or moan out your name. You’d smile, lost in his skin and the way it pressed against your own. “Squeezing me so tight, been waiting so long for this. So good.”

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[seancefemme]

I am seriously obssessed with your fratt fanarts, it makes me wonder... do you care to share your fratt fic recs?

aw ty!

as for fic recs....well you see i have too many beloved mutuals i refuse to embarrass myself in front of…..but here’s a couple of my favs that I remember under the cut :)

Heed the tags on the actual fics pls <3

Just Because You Can by serpentinefiend (one of my absolute favourites, Karen recruits the Defenders + Frank to find Matt after Midland Circle, but what she doesn’t know is that Frank and Matt were slowly becoming close just before, the tension is SO good, I LOVElovelove how Frank is written in this fic, frank has a dog :(((( also love how Jess and Frank’s interactions are written, chapters alternate between before Midland Circle and after :((( SO sad, made me cry a couple times ngl, *slaps frank* you would not believe the amount of emotional trauma we can put this guy through)

protect what I found by allofuswithwings (matt takes a grenade for Frank so Frank has to play nurse for a couple weeks out in a cabin in the woods)

one bad day by a_platypus  (season 3 rewrite now featuring frank castle, also featuring an angry at god and everyone season 3 matt, LOVE this one cause of the shenanigans…matt and frank wrestling/destroying the Liebermans kitchen in the middle of the night, matt having to be the getaway driver (no frank I CANNOT drive ‘well would you rather shoot at the people after us huh???’) matt happily eating breakfast while sarah and frank look in horror at the front page photo of the punisher and daredevil making out)

like a crateful of grenades by luulapants (fake-dating, I’m not familiar with the avengers at all but matt and frank are so funny in this one and the miscommunication is so good, Matt’s like whatever ill just tell the avengers im dating the punisher so they leave me alone….SHIT why is he so good at this, and Frank’s like I got the stupid fuckin nice apartment and bed for YOU, featuring matt telling frank that elektra pegged him <3)

only fools by sk8erboi_npc (Matt takes a half-dead Frank back to his apartment instead of handing him over to the police after the graveyard scene….oh and then Frank goes to the gala with Matt instead ;) 

murdock wins by tulikettu (uhhh matt owns a boxing gym and frank’s a boxer AU, idk i like it when people write frank as an awkward and earnest gentleman…and matt as a whore :))

buzz by tulikettu (matt gives frank a haircut, nothing more :)))))

the good side of you by jayyxx (oh look its another fic where matt gets seriously injured and frank takes care of him <3)

muscle memory by roipecheur (in desperation matt kills someone to save frank and himself….problem is that when he wakes up he doesn’t remember. Frank tries to keep the truth from him as long as possible)

double vision by roipecheur (matt and frank meet their au selves, nothing irritates them more than someone who knows them too well,,,and those someones are well…somewhat healthier versions of themselves)

twenty questions by roipecheur (frank gets kidnapped so leo and zach track down dd to help save him, featuring all my fav side characters; elektra, curtis, and the liebermans :)

the heart that bleeds for the unworthy + the unworthy by thesecretdetectivecollection (oh look another graveyard scene rewrite my beloved, a panicked matt tries to drag a half-dead and delirious Frank to the church and then to his apartment and then their slow burn goes on from there, the dialogue and matt’s internal monologue are written really well imo)

Bang. Bang. by wobuzhidao322 (alternate meeting, the punisher bleeding out on some blind lawyers roof lol)

i have never once in my life been asked for fic recs so idk the etiquette but yeah…here’s some i think about a lot

[adaodinson]

Little bird

Hi! So, it´s been a while since I posted a fic, I apologize for that. These past months have been… weird, to say the least, but now I´m back :)

I recently finished watching Daredevil and Punisher, so of course I have to write for Matt and Frank. I´ve had this idea stuck in my head for a while so here it is, I hope you guys like it. And yes, I recommend all the songs and artists that I mention in here.

Summary: An interest thing about you gets Matt´s attention enough to want to know more about you, but also to be nervous to actually do so.

Warnings: Nothing, I think, just mentions of pain but it´s muscular so… and well, English is not my first language, so sorry for any mistakes.

Relationship: Matt Murdock x gender neutral!reader

You knew moving into a new city (especially one like New York) would be tiring, you knew it would take a lot of mental and physical effort, but this was ridiculous. You had been trying to carry that stupid table upstairs and were halfway when you felt your back couldn´t take it anymore, the table wasn´t big or anything, but it was quite heavy. You had been carrying things inside all afternoon, so it made sense for you to be this tired. You had started off at a reasonable hour, when the sunlight invaded the windows and spread to all corners; now, the only source of light were the weak lightbulbs that hung from the ceiling, and it was getting harder and harder to focus on where to place your next step not only due to your aching legs and back, or the poor illumination, you also started to feel the rush of the other residents getting home from work.

You had only seen your neighbor twice: the day you arrived to take a look at the apartment before buying it, and the one time it took you a while to find your keys and open your door so you bumped into each other on the hallway. You knew his name was Matt, and he knew your name as well, he also knew where you came from, but that was about it. He seemed like a nice person, he was definitely handsome, but there was something about him that you couldn´t quite place your finger on that made him… intriguing.

You had only been living there for about a week, and had had no time to rest or even think for more than five minutes, but what you missed the most was taking your singing classes, or at least getting to seat down while playing games on your phone and sing along to your playlist. Singing was one of your passions, you weren´t amazing at it, but decent enough. You sang all the time: while cooking, while showering, while working, all the time. It made you happy, helped you relax, you just loved it.

As you carried your table through the final stair block, your mind drifted to the next song you would want to practice with your teacher (she was from the same place as you were, and you decided to keep taking classes with her through Skype or FaceTime). It could be “Without you” by Air Supply, ooor Wherever you go by Lola Lennox. You were so immersed in your thinking you didn´t realize you had stopped moving, or that Matt was standing beside you, waiting for you to keep walking.

He was between amused and confused, he could feel in your heartbeat you were happy but tired, he could sense you weren´t moving and also the fact that you were carrying something. He thought you might be resting a bit, but you were only three steps away from the top so that wasn´t it. He cleared his throat in order to make you aware of his presence, and that simple gesture took you out of your thoughts like a lightning, so suddenly that you almost fell on your back. Good thing you didn´t.

-Matt, hi! I´m sorry! I´m sorry! Wait a second- You said as you hurried to walk upstairs, leave the table in front of your door and go back to him. He giggled softly, it was the cutest sound you had ever heard.

-Again, I´m sorry, I got lost in my thoughts. Here, I left the table I was carrying in the hallway so let me help you get to your door- You said as you placed your arm near him for him to notice it and grab it. He did so.

-Thank you Y/N, and you don´t have to worry or apologize, we all get lost in thought sometimes- He said as you led him to his apartment avoiding your table.

-Yeah, I guess we do-.

You got to his door. He opened it, said goodnight kindly and walked inside. Normally you would have wanted him to stay outside with you and talk for a while, but it was not hard to see he was just as tired as you were. You headed inside your own apartment and settled the table in it´s place. You gazed around the room feeling proud that you had managed to put everything inside. For all the bigger things of course you had had help, but the rest were up to you.

You sighed and felt all your body parts urging you to drop to the floor and sleep, you could feel your arms and legs trembling and that familiar knot in your muscles after making such efforts. You headed straight for the bathroom, needing a shower more that anything. In the past few days, you had only showered for the sake of being clean, but not to actually enjoy it. You had to rush and hurry, but now, you took your time to choose the songs you wanted to listen to, humped in and sang your heart out.

The walls of the apartments were thick, so it was really hard to hear what was going on in other rooms, but for Matt this wasn´t a problem. He was reading in his couch when he heard a small hint of a familiar song: “Rock DJ” by Robbie Williams. He made an effort to hear it more clearly, and that´s when he reached it. He distinguished your voice singing along to the song. It wasn´t the best voice he had ever heard, or the most tuned, but it was his new favorite one, it definitely was beautiful. There was something about your passion, your heart being poured into each word you sang that filled his ears like the strong smell of a chocolate cake fills your nose. He couldn´t get enough of it. Even when you sang out of tune, when you ran out of breath, when you failed at singing a difficult note. Also when your breath was just enough, when you hit a hard note like a baseball player hits the ball. All the time, no matter what you were singing or how you were singing it, he found it impossible to focus on anything else.

It became his “ritual”. You had started taking your classes again, so when he learned the time and day you took them, he would try to get home in time to hear you. Queen, Air Supply, Pink, Erasure, Rick Astley, Måneskin and Adam Lambert were the artists and bands that you sang the most, and through you he had found new songs that he adored and re-found old songs that he considered golden. Many times he walked over to the door, ready to compliment your singing after you finished a class, but, what would he say? That your voice had become his favorite sound? How would he explain how he could hear you so clearly? He just couldn´t. Every time he felt ready, with the right words at the tip of his tongue and ready to escape, doubt filled his mind: What if you found him creepy? What if you don´t want to be complimented? What if he said something stupid?

Of course, thinking that you wouldn´t enjoy hearing compliments on your singing was a stupid thought on it´s own. You enjoyed singing so much, but you were quite insecure about it as well. It was really hard for you to sing in front of other people, especially for the first time, and every time anyone complimented your singing, not only did you remember that person forever, but also it always made your day. Oh, but hearing a compliment from Matt, that idea sounded so perfect it didn´t even cross your mind. The gorgeous, nice and mysterious guy from across the hall complimenting you… not even in your daydreams. But just like they say, there is a first time for everything.

Matt was so immersed in the conversation he was having with Foggy, he didn´t stop to hear your heartbeat, to know if you were home. You were.

-I´m telling you, Foggy. It´s just magnificent, the passion and heart they pour into their singing, it´s beautiful. And now I know their class is at 8 every Wednesday, so when I get to be at home at that time it just makes the rest of my week- Foggy had rarely seen his friend this passionate about something, and he was really happy for him, but he wondered why he didn´t try to get to know you. If he wanted to find a good reason for him to hear your singing with you knowing he was, why didn´t he just become friends with you? All his questions were answered when you opened your door with the brightest smile Foggy had seen in a long time.

-Do you really think that, Matt?- you asked almost shyly. Matt froze for a second and then turned around slowly to face you. After seeing that tiny interaction, it was more than clear to Foggy that his friend wasn´t only interested in your voice, he was interested in you.

-Well, yeah, I mean, it´s always very pleasant to hear you- he said with a shy smile.

You were so happy you didn´t even stop to think before embracing the man in a tight hug. You could feel tears ready to exit your eyes and fill your cheeks, but you held them back. He hesitated before returning the hug. You both felt as if your missing puzzle piece was being taken away from you when you parted.

-You have no idea how much it means for me to hear that, especially from you- you couldn´t control that last part.

-Well, hi. I´m Foggy, and I was just leaving- Foggy said happily as he turned around ready to leave.

-No wait! I´m sorry, I´m Y/N. You don´t have to go, I just…-

-Nice to meet you Y/N! And don´t you worry, I´ll get to talk to Matt tomorrow at work, tonight you two should go out for dinner- Foggy answered with a smirk.

-Did you just ask them out FOR me?- Matt said, trying to sound offended.

-Well, someone had to do it- he said with a wink and left.

-Mmmm, I heard about a great Chinese place a few blocks away, if you are up for what your friend proposed- You said trying to measure Matt´s reaction.

-I love Chinese, let´s go, little bird- Matt said as he extended his arm for you to grab. Both of you with the biggest smiles either of you had had for a while, including the one you had when you heard his compliments. Oh, and the smiles would go on with you two, that´s for sure.

[petertingle-yipyip]

YES.

They’d actually be so funny together, like deadpool would just be spouting some random crap and Ex would be like “wtf goes on in your head?”

And they’d have some sad and heartfelt moments talking about their life stories and feeling robbed of the lives they could’ve had, etc.

And Ex would be so supportive of Deadpool when it comes to his looks. And he’s totally on board with killing traffickers and dealers with her.

“Oh, you wanna kill some child traffickers? Count me in!”

I can imagine her, frank, and deadpool together. Frank would be so tired of their shit lol.

I feel like both Exodus and Wade could learn quite a lot from each other.

How do you think Wade and Matt would interact?

P. S.

I just remembered that Exodus’ power includes reading and feeling other’s emotions, so she’d be aware that Wade’s putting on a “happy” front. She’d be aware of the fact that he’s not so secretly very sad, angry, depressed, etc. This just made me sad lol.

i can just imagine her running around and just seeing the red suit first

E: goddammit, Devil. can’t i have one night where you leave me the hell alone?

DP: woah, woah, woah. love this energy, right? powerful woman, doesn’t need a man, yadda yadda yadda. but! i’m afraid i’m the wrong man and i’ve never seen you before… love the look by the way. black leather, me-ow!

E: you’re kinda weird…. *sees the swords and the guns* wanna help me get rid of some jerks in track suits that are fucking with some girls?

DP: uh, yes? *laughing* do you need to ask?

so i don’t really know anything ab Team Red (DD/DP/SM) dynamics so this is what i picture

dp would annoy matt so much. if he thought ex was bad, dp is so much worse. there’s a joke for everything and 86% of the time, it’s inappropriate

e: i’ll go first, paralyze them with their own fear-

dd: we need stay together

dp: or! none of that and we just go in there, fully cocked and balls out-

e: isn’t the expression ‘half-cocked’?

dp: i’ve never had someone ask for half a cock. do you know something i don’t?

dd: you’re both idiots.

dp: no, but seriously. who’s satisfied with half-cocked?

and if we’re talking out of costume. matt loves/hates when wade hangs around the office. he’s always sticking his nose in the middle of what they’re working on.

reader and karen are doing some research and here comes wade, slowly covering the computer with his drawing of him, dd, and ex

w: we’re on the moon… get it? cause we’re out of this world!

m: *rubbing eyes in frustration* where did he get crayons from?

but ex and wade have like one life-questioning, existential crisis conversation every night

dp: what if were meant to be a bad guy? or like… not this?

e: everyone i’ve killed… i never had a chance to be good, like Daredevil. i’m always gonna be the bloody one between us and maybe it’s better, yknow? it’d kill him if he ever had to take a life

dp: i cover my pain with humor so no one ever knows and it’s just… hard sometimes. i have so many feelings and i can’t say anything

e: i know… i’ve always known… i just didn’t want to ask, figured you’d tell me when you’re ready

dp: *trying not to cry*

[daresplaining]

A Few Thoughts About the Current Run

    I feel like I ought to say a few things about my feelings on Zdarsky’s run, as of right now (August 2020, pre-Annual-- that may be important). I haven’t said much about this run, and I should admit that I actually stopped reading it for a while. At a certain point, I realized I was dreading the release of each preview, and took that as a sign that maybe I should take a break and just re-read some back issues instead. This is, above all, supposed to be fun; I never, ever want reading DD to feel like a chore.  

    That said, I am now caught up and feel ready to begin untangling exactly why this run is so distasteful to me. I’ve been fortunate to have other DD fans to chat with about this, which has helped me to pinpoint what my problems are... because on paper, this run seems like something I’d enjoy. Matt accidentally kills a guy; that’s always fun. Marco Checchetto is great. The story explores Daredevil’s relationship with the citizens of Hell’s Kitchen, which I love. Foggy helps Matt with an action-y Daredevil thing; that’s awesome. There are some very cool fights. Elektra is in it. Stilt-Man is (briefly) in it. It has all the trappings of an interesting narrative. But there is a giant hole in the middle of this run, and that hole is Matt Murdock-shaped and impossible to ignore.     

    I read Daredevil comics for a lot of things (anyone who’s been following me for the past few years might think I read Daredevil comics for Mike Murdock, and you may have a point there) but first and foremost, I read them for Matt. There is a lot that makes a good DD story great-- historically, the comic has featured great supporting casts, and that’s another problem with this run that I’ll get back to in a minute-- but Matt is always the anchor. One of the greatest strengths in Daredevil comes from the fact that the protagonist is such a compelling character. You are interested in what he’s doing. You want to follow his story. You enjoy being inside his head. I’m not saying that you can’t write a good Matt-free Daredevil story-- you definitely can. But if Matt is present and written poorly, the whole story will collapse around him, and that’s been my experience with Zdarsky’s run. Part of the reason I’ve taken so long to write this post is because I’ve been trying to figure out if my complaint comes from my own personal taste-- which is not a basis on which I can critique this comic-- or whether the problem is inherent in the work itself. Having discussed it with other people, I feel comfortable saying that I think the problem is in the writing. 

    Zdarsky’s Matt feels profoundly unfamiliar to me, and that in itself isn’t necessarily a problem, but I don’t find this new version of my favorite superhero interesting. I actually find him a little repellant. If this run had been my introduction to Daredevil, I would’ve said “Nope” and read something else. Matt is a character with depth. He is intensely multifaceted. His relationship to superheroing is complicated, his views on justice and morality are rich and often contradictory. Zdarsky somehow missed all of that and has crafted a one-dimensional character with a blatantly black-and-white sense of morality. Matt’s reaction to accidentally killing someone seems to be to decide that all superheroes are bad-- something I complained about at the beginning of the run and which, unfortunately, only grew more annoying as the story progressed. Zdarsky’s Matt is painfully self-righteous, to a degree that makes him extremely unlikeable (at least to me). And yes, Matt has been written as unlikeable before. I actually love when Matt behaves badly; I find that fascinating from a narrative perspective. But I’ve realized that the key reason that has been effective in the past is because the story has never condoned that behavior. When Matt was emotionally abusive toward Heather Glenn, Frank Miller went out of his way to show us-- via the side characters, via blatant expressions of Heather’s pain-- that Matt was in the wrong. When Matt was a jerk in Bendis’ and Brubaker’s runs, when he drove his friends away, when he acted irrationally and harmfully, the narrative commented on that jerkiness and irrationality. 

    But Zdarsky does not do that in his run. He presents Matt’s irrational and jerkish behavior without comment or nuance, as if it’s a perfectly normal, reasonable way for Matt to act under the circumstances, and I have been surprised to realize how distasteful I find that, and how bad it makes Matt look. There’s a difference between having a character who is comfortably flawed-- whose behavior you’re supposed to occasionally question-- and a character who is just unpleasant and unlikeable, seemingly by accident. In the most recent issue (#21), Matt has an extremely upsetting interaction with Spider-Man, one of his oldest friends, and Matt is positioned as heroic for behaving this way, and it made me feel a little ill, because there’s no textual examination or questioning of this behavior. It’s just Matt, pushing people away, being Angsty(TM) and Gritty(TM) and lone wolf-y just because, in a way that is grating and unpleasant and completely lacks nuance. 

    The other major element of Zdarsky’s characterization of Matt is religion. I’ve mentioned before (as have other DD fans before me) that Matt is not generally written as religious, and it’s a strange phenomenon that this characterization has appeared in multiple adaptations (the movie and the Netflix show) while having very little actual presence in the source material. But it was a key theme in the Netflix show, and while hopefully that influence will disappear from the comics as more time passes, we are still in a honeymoon phase wherein MCU elements are still popping up in the 616 universe. It’s clear that Zdarsky really liked the show, and Soule as well; I’m certainly not letting Soule off the hook here, because the idea of Matt being devoutly Christian showed up his run first. But there, you could get away from it if it wasn’t your thing (which, for me, it’s not). Soule had whole story arcs that didn’t mention it. But Zdarsky has made it 75% of Matt’s personality. When he isn’t fighting or sleeping with someone in this run, Matt is angsting about God. 

    I hesitate to complain about this because it’s Zdarsky’s right as a DD writer to change the protagonist however he likes. It’s frustrating, yes, but not actually a sign of bad writing per se. Plus, not everyone is me. Many people-- probably including many people who were fans of the Netflix show and are entering the comics via that connection (which seems to be the target audience for this run)-- may be religious and may connect to MCU/Zdarsky Matt in that way. And that’s wonderful. I want to be very clear: it’s not the religiousness itself that I’m complaining about. My complaint is this: if you’re going to drastically alter a character, you need to back it up. You need to dig into it, make that new personality element feel powerful and real, and integrate it into the character’s pre-existing personality. And if you’re going to base the entirety of that character’s emotional journey on that new trait, you need to work to make sure it’s accessible to your readership. I, as a non-religious person, have no sense of why Matt is so upset about God. I have no frame of reference for his pain, either from my own experiences or from previous Daredevil continuity, and Zdarsky does nothing to develop or explore the basis of Matt’s faith, and so it all just falls flat. I feel alienated by this run. I see an angsty, self-righteous, prickly jerk ranting about needing to do God’s will, and then I put the issue down and read some She-Hulk instead. If Zdarsky (or Soule-- again, he could have done this too) had made an effort to actually explore and explain Matt’s feelings about his religion, rather than lazily shoving that characterization in there and assuming readers will just accept it, it wouldn’t bother me nearly as much as it has. 

    Also, I feel I have to mention; this is a fantasy universe. Matt went to Hell and yelled at Mephisto in Nocenti’s run, and it was awesome. Maybe this is just me, but if you’re going to bring in religion, at least have some fun with it! Bookend Nocenti’s run: Matt goes to Heaven, runs into God, and she gives him some free therapy and a souvenir t-shirt (or, I don’t know, something). To give Zdarsky credit, he did at least hint at that sort of thing in Matt’s conversation with Reed Richards in #9. 

    I'm going to cut this post short, because I really don’t enjoy writing negative reviews. I’d much rather post about things I love, and over the next few weeks I do plan to highlight aspects of this run that I’ve enjoyed. But I’ll end by saying that the weaknesses in Matt’s characterization could have been mitigated by a great supporting cast. Having prominent secondary protagonists would have provided outside perspectives on Matt’s behavior and given the reader other characters to root for when he got too out-of-hand. They would have drawn out the human elements in Matt’s character and helped give him that nuance he so desperately needs. But this run, just like Soule’s before it, is woefully underpopulated. Foggy’s presence is extremely weak and his appearances far too infrequent. Apart from brief cameos in MacKay’s Man Without Fear mini, Kirsten McDuffie and Sam Chung have both vanished, and I’m worried that Kirsten might have joined Milla Donovan in the limbo of still-living-but-permanently-benched ex-love interests. The women in this run are all either villains or people for Matt to sleep with (I was pumped about Elektra’s return and the idea of her training Matt, but her characterization was disappointing (I may write a separate post about this), and Mindy Libris could have been really compelling as a moral person trying to survive life in a crime family, but instead she was just a one-note, underdeveloped victim for Matt to lust after). To Zdarsky’s credit, he has clearly been trying to give the Kingpin a humanizing story arc, but even that I haven’t found compelling enough to want to keep reading (though that could just be me). Cole North was intriguing at first, but he ended up feeling more like a concept than an actual person. And none of these characters engage with Matt on a human, emotional level, which is what a good supporting cast needs to do. I commented early-on that this run felt like all flash and no bang (Is that a term? It is now.) and I think I still stand by that-- it’s all bombastic plot concepts and big ideas without any of the actual development or nuance necessary to make them work. There is nothing in this run that has pulled me in and held my interest; in the absence of a Matt I can connect to, I need something, and so far I haven’t found it. 

    I could go on, but I think I’ve made my point. This run was nominated for an Eisner for best ongoing series, so apparently someone likes it, but it has become clear that-- so far, anyway-- it’s just not right for me.  

[adamwatchesmovies]

Superman: Unbound (2013)

Superman: Unbound is a perfectly fine adventure featuring the Man of Steel. Not among DC's best animated films, it nonetheless offers plenty for fans of the characters.

Based on the Superman: Brainiac run by Geoff Johns and Gary Frank, this is also a kinda-sorta sequel to Superman/Batman Apocalypse. When Superman (voiced by Matt Bomer) encounters an alien android, it is recognized by Supergirl (Molly Quinn) as an emissary of Brainiac (John Noble). The invader's mission is to collect all of the knowledge in the universe. To do so, Brainiac must limit the information worth collecting by destroying every civilization he encounters. Now, he's set his sight on Earth.

Those who've read the graphic novel will immediately notice the art style is quite different from the source. While the picture looks great, it's noticeably limited by the budget of a straight-to-home video adventure. It's a shame Gary Frank's realistic art style had to be simplified but when Superman, Supergirl, Brainiac, his drones, and Lois Lane (who looks particularly good and is voiced by Stana Katic) are in motion, they're visually appealing. There are a few scenes where computer graphics are noticeably used to construct some of the more difficult elements of the story, such as background elements or Brainiac’s mothership. Overall they were well - if not perfectly - blended in.

The issues with the film could be categorized as nitpicks. Before I address them let me remind you that Superman: Unbound is perfectly fine as-is. As an introduction to Brainiac, it covers all the bases. The character interactions add some dimension to them, the action scenes are satisfying, and the story is solid. That said, I was disappointed by certain aspects. Ultimately, the film turns into a big slug-fest between a buff Brainiac and Superman during the last 15 or so minutes. I’m not opposed to action, but it’s a missed opportunity. We’ve seen Superman punch robots into scrap before. Outmuscling the smart villain isn't all that satisfying. There is technically a moment where brains - not brawns - ultimately counts but you don't get that lightbulb that glows so bright it blows up kind of reveal despite a smart moment of thinking that turns the tide of the battle.

I was also annoyed at a few unnecessary moments throughout. We see Brainiac’s emissaries killing people numerous times. Why? To make the story "more adult"? It's not shocking and doesn't add tension to the story. If the robots had placed their palms on the people’s heads and they rolled their eyes back and started drooling as if their minds had been drained of all information you could have had the same effect. Other “adult”/”mature” moments, like Lois Lane giving Brainiac the finger could have easily been omitted. Those few seconds would have been better spent elsewhere.

Let's get back to what works. This is a much better use of Supergirl than the last time we saw her. Lois Lane is great. All of the scenes at the Daily Planet are enjoyable and help Superman's home of Metropolis… although it does remind me of the worst scene of the film, in which the newspaper employees defeat a bunch of Brainiac’s robots by pushing them out of a window. These constructs go toe-to-toe with Superman… and regular people can take them out? Yikes. The scenes set in space or on Brainiac’s ship are all good. I’m certain most people won’t share my criticisms of the picture and overall, I'd categorize them as minimal. It's successful enough to make you understand why someone wanted to take the comic book and turn it into a movie. With the way it concludes, several plot points could be expanded upon and I’d love to see a follow-up. I may not have been pleased with the way the action action action! played out, but when it comes to the overall story, both when Superman is donning his cape and when he’s just Clark Kent, I was loving it.

Sometimes good is good enough. If you’re interested in this picture, you’ll enjoy it. Despite my criticisms, I certainly did. Check out Superman: Unbound and when you do, stay until after the end credits. (On Blu-ray, July 29, 2015)

[daredevilexchange]

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What's your fannish ID? @maniskordaze on tumblr and givemesomewings on ao3! my tumblr one is kind of a play on normani’s (the singer) name. her first and middle names are normani kordei. and my ao3 name is just a lyric i really like from one of fifth harmony’s songs lol.

What types of fanworks do you create? fics!

What are your favourite types of fanworks, when you're not creating? fics, fanart and gifs.

What do you like in particular about this fandom? the netflix shows are definitely what made me fans of the characters. they’re so well written, amazingly acted and just engaging on every level. i fell in love with all of their stories and how they’re portrayed onscreen. i couldn’t and still can’t get enough of any of them. i once saw a post somewhere that said, “all of my favorite characters are gay whether they know it or not” and i never had i ever seen something so true in my life lmao. so back when i was super new to ao3, i wasn’t really sure how ships and fic types were classified. one day i decided to search for some random daredevil fics to feed my need for matt murdock content and totally accidentally stumbled across a fratt fic. the rest was history lol.

Do you like participating in fan events? i love it! the hardest part is getting myself to abide by the deadlines but when i can, it’s really fun lol

What about your creating process? i don’t always, but more often than not i find myself needing music to write. i sometimes find a song that i think can relate to a character or an idea i have and base a fic around that. but usually i’ll just take whatever song i’m obsessed with at the moment and try to make it make sense with what i’m writing haha

Do you interact a lot with other fans?  not really, but reading/commenting on fics that i love and the occasional message is enough for me. Do you have other fandoms you'd like to talk about? omg there are too many to name! but recently i have become OBSESSED with mortal kombat lol. i am this close to writing a scorpion/subzero fic. and scorpion and frank have vaguely similar “origin” stories so maybe there is a correlation between my love for both the characters.

Is there any particular piece you’d like to showcase for this post? https://archiveofourown.org/works/21117134 i think i did pretty good job with writing from frank’s voice here. plus i think matt and frank’s insecurities in their relationship are really interesting to explore and make for great angst lol.

Where can your fanworks be found? all my works can be found on ao3! https://archiveofourown.org/users/givemesomewings/

Thank you, @maniskordaze !

banner by @context-is-for-kingpins​ !

[ID on a white background, four black triangles that look like spotlights from above. Each illuminates one of the Defenders silhouetted in white: Jessica, Luke, Danny, Matt. A hand on the left is holding a pen writing the words Content Creator Spotlight. There is a little Punisher skull on the pen. End ID]

[amhrosina]

Jealousy (Frank Castle x Reader)

MASTERLIST // TAG LIST REQUEST FORM

A/N: A little Matt Murdock x reader if you squint. Thanks for requesting, nonnie! I didn't know if you wanted smut, but it wasn't requested, so I just added a little baby interaction at the end that sort of alludes to smut after the end of the fic.

Requests are open!

Request: Could you do one where yn is working with Red but he doesn’t know she’s married to Frank until he shows up and when he finds out he confess to yn that he likes her and frank get jealous and overprotective

Summary: Frank overhears Matt asking you out and sets him straight.

Warnings: a teeny baby tiny little bit of barely smut at the end

Hell’s Kitchen was abnormally quiet as you waited for Red to finish his patrol of the area. No sirens, no screaming, not even the occasional gunshot to keep you on your toes. Your night was rapidly approaching an early end. Not that you minded, though. Frank was back home, patiently waiting for you to crawl into bed next to him.  

Even though he always insisted that you don’t worry about him, you knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep until he could hold you in his arms and physically see that you were unharmed. It was the same when the roles were reversed, too. When Frank was the one running around all night, you spent most of the time pacing around the living room, pretending to read a book until he came home. 

Your breath fogged in front of you. The November air was crispy in your lungs, and you couldn’t help but bounce from foot to foot as you did a 360 sweep around the roof. What the hell was taking Red so long? You could’ve circled the entirety of Hell’s Kitchen twice by now.  

The hair on the back of your neck prickled as a light thud sounded behind you. You waited for any indication that told you not to turn around and kick the person's lights out.  

“Hey, Killer.”  

Matt’s voice was gruff, but soft. You instantly relaxed, shoulders dropping in relief as you turned around. 

“What’s up, Red? You find anything?”  

“Nothing important.” He responded, shrugging his shoulders. 

You furrowed your eyebrows. Matt’s behavior was alarmingly different than you were used to. Typically, Matt’s demeanor was blunt, sometimes arrogant, and a little bit on the cocky side. Tonight, he was pacing the roof, shrugging his shoulders, and he even looked a little anxious. 

“Red? You good?” 

“Let me take you out to dinner.” 

His words were rushed, pushed together into one breath and said so quickly that you almost missed it altogether. You gaped at him, waiting for him to say something else. The silence between you hung heavy. 

“What?” You finally ask, not knowing what else to say. How were you going to explain to Matt that you couldn’t possibly get dinner with him on account of your VeryBigAndScary husband. 

“Let me take you out,” he began walking towards you, “as Matt, not the Devil. You’re strong and you’re smart and you’re beautiful and I would feel like an idiot if I didn’t at least try to offer myself up to you. Will you let me? Take you out, I mean.”  

You sucked in a breath.  

“Matt, I-” 

A loud chuckle behind you had you whirling around. Matt was immediately defensive, stepping in front of you to shield you from whoever meant harm. You knew that chuckle though, and you knew Matt should probably be running in the opposite direction instead of towards it. 

Frank was leaning against the wall, arms crossed, smile dangerous.  

“Frank, this doesn’t concern you.” The softness of Matt’s voice from moments ago was long gone, replaced by the low voice of the Devil. 

Frank’s smile grew wider, and you rolled your eyes. It was like watching a cat taunt the mouse it was 3 seconds away from devouring.  

“It doesn’t concern me, Red? When you’re asking my wife out on a date?” 

You groan and run your hands over your face.  

“What are you doing here, honey?” You mumble, shaking your head. 

“I had a feeling, sweetheart. It’s a good thing I came, too, or else you’d be breaking Red’s heart over here.” 

“Honey? Wife? What the hell is going on here? You two know each other?” Matt’s voice was rapidly rising as he looked between you and Frank.  

You ignore Frank, whose overprotectiveness was starting to grate on your nerves. You were perfectly capable of turning someone down.  

“Matt, uh...” You pause, searching for the right words, “Frank is my husband. We’ve been married for almost three years. Well, technically I’m married to Pete Castiglione, but you know, semantics...” You trailed off, hoping Matt wouldn’t be too angry about your secret. 

“What?” Matt was thoroughly confused, voice rising to a pitch you didn’t know he was capable of. “Why didn’t you tell me?”  

The question was aimed at you, but Frank answered before you could respond.  

“I told her not to. I didn’t want her being tied to me during that legal shit we had to go through last year.” 

“It’s been 9 months since you were pardoned, Frank. What the...what the fuck, guys?” 

Matt sounded genuinely betrayed, but you couldn’t help the giggle that bubbled out of your chest.  

“Matt, I’m so sorry, but once your business with Frank was finished, I didn’t know how to tell you.” 

“Something like, ‘Oh hey Matt, by the way, I’m married to the guy who chained you to a water tower that one time.’” 

Matt had a small grin on his face now, and you sagged with relief. He wasn’t mad. Frank moved closer to you, pulling your back into his front as he mumbled into your ear, “He deserved it.” 

“I most certainly did not.”  

Frank ran his hand up your arm, following the upwards slope of your shoulder until his fingers rested lightly on your pulse. His other arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you into a tight hold. You gasped at his forwardness, especially in front of Matt.  

“Red, fuck off, will you?” Frank’s words were thrown in Matt’s direction, who was doing a terrible job at looking like he wasn’t listening. 

“Sorry, Matty.” You mumble, “I’ll make it up to you.” 

Matt let out a tight, “mhm”, before jumping from the ledge and disappearing into the night. 

“That was mean, Frank.” You sigh, resting your head on his chest. 

“He was hitting on you. I think my reaction was pretty tame. I could’ve bashed his head into that brick wall.” 

“He wasn’t hitting on me. He was asking me out. It was...gentlemanly. And quit being jealous.” You swatted at his chest. 

“I’m not allowed to be jealous when a guy asks my wife out on a date?” 

You rolled your eyes, turning to head down the fire escape when Frank’s arms tightened around you. He peppered kisses down your neck, softly nipping at the sweet spot below your ear. His hand trailed down your stomach, stopping just below your waistline where his fingers began to play with the hem of your underwear. 

“Frank,” you gasped, “what if Matt can still hear us?” 

His voice was a low, silky coil in your gut.  

“Let him. Now, stop talking about other men when my hands are so close to your-” 

A loud clash of metal from a few blocks away cut him off. Matt could definitely still hear you. Frank let out a bark of laughter before devouring you whole, and you couldn’t do anything but try to quiet your moans until you were sure Matt couldn’t possibly hear you anymore. 

Tag List:

@xleiaorgana @mukbee @dilfs5678 @kokoterainonago666 @blackwidownat2814 @mymamalife @minervadashwood @emiemiemiii @h4rrys @messymissy @alexxavicry @hallecarey1 @km-ffluv

[something-tofightfor]

Someone Else (Billy Russo x Reader)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Word Count: 6000 (ON. THE. DOT.)

Rating: R. Mentions of violence, casual sex, Punisher S1/ partial S2 references. 

Summary: The first Halloween spent with Billy after his name has been cleared doesn’t go quite according to plan. 

Author’s Note: This is for @forever-rogue​‘s Halloween Challenge. It’s technically a one-shot, but it takes place in the same AU as Restart - a few months before that one.

I chose the three following prompts: 

“I hate costumes. There is no way in hell I am dressing up.” 

“Is that red syrup? Please tell me it’s syrup.”

“10 pumpkins for our porch? That seems excessive.”

If you wanna be tagged in something (or removed!) let me know.

General:

@the-blind-assassin-12 @its-my-little-dumpster-fire @obscurilicious @sweetybuzz25 @suchatinyinfinity @lexxierave @gollyderek @poindexted @ificouldhelpyouforget @elanor-of-imladris @thesandbeneathmytoes @luminex3 @geeksareunique @weallhaveadestiny @mfackenthal @thesumofmychoices @yannii04 @beautiful-thinking @drinix @agentlingerie  @blah-blah-fuckit-shit  @dreams-with-thoughts  @wangmangagavroche​

Billy Russo:

@nananananananananananabatman @damalseer @chibiyanai @life-is-a-melody @songtoyou​

Uncategorized:

@banditthewriter​ @padfootagain​ @madamrogersstorytelling​ @ethereal-heavcns​ @editboutique​ @marauderskeeper​ @ilkaeliseb​ @delicatelilyflower​ @king4thesirens​ @ymariejp​ @mr-robot-x​ @rageshots​ @littlemermaidprobz​ @introvertedlibrary​ @writing-for-a-chance​ @yesixoxo @ilikebeachessushiandsmallanimals​ @likeorions​ @swiftyhowlz​ @dylanobrusso​ @malik-payne​ @lynne1993​ @traeumerinwitzhelden​ @ladyblablabla​ @dreamwritesimagines​ @audreychaz​ @tc-elliot @kind-wolf​ @honeyydippaa​ @binbonsadoration​ @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes​ @ms-delos​ @jeanettexkillian​ @avengerswhore​ @elioelioeli0​ @projectcampbell​ @giggleberts​ 

“I’m comin’ home, you there?” You cleared your throat, reaching out with one hand to adjust the pumpkin you’d just placed on the top step.  I am. “Want me to stop and grab dinner?” 

 “No, Billy.” You sighed, turning and planting yourself, feet flat and looking out at the street. “I’ll cook, I can go in and start now that I know you’ll be back soon.” He laughed and you heard the noise of cars honking in the background. 

 “You’re outside? What are you doin’?” A door slammed and the traffic noises stopped. He just got in the car, means he’ll be here in less than twenty. 

 “You’ll see, Billy.” Tilting your head to hold the phone between your ear and shoulder, you looked to your right at the orange gourds that lined the steps. “I’ll let you go so you can focus on the road.” He laughed again, quietly agreeing with you and even after you’d hung up the phone, you stayed seated, eyes on the pumpkins and a small frown on your face. Things were slowly getting back to normal for the two of you, and Billy - along with Frank and Curtis - had just re-opened Anvil. You knew that even though the company had initially been founded with dirty money, Billy’s goal was to help others like himself - displaced military vets that still wanted to serve and protect those around them, and so after the trial had ended - Billy (and Frank) getting cleared - going back to what he knew had been a logical step. 

 You’d moved into the Brownstone before he’d been officially exonerated, and though he’d been deemed a flight risk, Matt and Foggy had been willing to vouch for Billy, proving that he’d need to stay in New York City for his continuing medical care  - and that he had something else that would stop him from leaving: you. It had taken months of patience and convincing, but when armed with the truth, Billy had been more inclined to believe that you’d never stopped loving him, and had started to forgive himself for what he’d done to everyone. That happening had been like flipping a switch; memories started coming back, interactions with Billy seemed more real, and with each passing day, Billy’s wounds - both on the surface and in his mind - healed further. 

 You glanced down at your left hand, the glittering diamond still shocking you with its presence, and smiled for a moment before standing and heading for the door. Billy’s proposal only ten days after winning his case had been a total shock. You knew that he cared for you, knew that he loved you, but hadn’t thought that he’d ever actually ask you to marry him, even though you’d hoped it would happen at some point. But he did. Hand on the doorknob, you looked back over your shoulder at the steps, taking one last breath of the crisp Autumn air before you entered your house, the door clicking shut behind you. 

 --- 

 Thirty minutes later, you were pulling chicken out of the oven when you heard the front door close again and Billy’s heavy footsteps moving down the hallway toward you. “Hey.” Grinning, you turned to face him after putting the baking dish down onto one of the unused stove burners. “So, there are like 10 pumpkins for our porch? That seems excessive, doesn’t it?” Making a face at him, you shrugged your shoulders. 

 “It’s Halloween, Billy, I just… I don’t know, it looks nice.” Narrowing his eyes, Billy stepped toward you, one hand up and moving slowly over the top of his head, the hair there still short. “It’s the first real holiday that we’ll have here, and …”

 “Yeah, I know.” Billy cleared his throat. “I just… you expectin’ trick or treaters?” No, but… “This isn’t the neighborhood for that, maybe in our old buildings, but not…” He sighed, shaking his head. “I don’t even think there are kids on this street.” There aren’t, but we’re so close to Central Park… “They wouldn’t come here anyway, where we live ain’t exactly a secret.” 

 “Billy, what is that supposed to mean?” You stepped toward him, shaking your head. “We live in the nice neighborhood now, that means we’d have good candy.” He didn’t even crack a smile and so you stepped closer, reaching up to put a hand on his shoulder. “What’s wrong?” He looked down at you, lips twisted into a frown and shook his head, jaw working as he clenched it. 

 “You know how everyone looks at me, what they think.” Billy swallowed, shaking his head and moving his hands to your waist. “When we go out? When they come in to Anvil, when I’m walkin’ down the damn street… people are afraid of me, you know? They see… this shit.” He gestured to his face, nose wrinkling. “They see it and they look horrified, and they know.” You lifted the hand from his shoulder to his face, thumb moving over the scar on his cheek, entirely visible above his neatly trimmed beard. “They know what they saw on TV and they know what she still says, and…” His grip on you tightened, and you didn’t know if it was a conscious movement or not, but you didn’t mind. After waiting almost two years to feel his hands on you, you didn’t take any of his touches for granted. 

 “Billy.” You closed your eyes for a second and then opened them, raising the other hand to the side side of his face and forcing him to look at you. “They don’t know shit. Madani’s never going to let it go, she still thinks…” You trailed off, shaking your head. “She’s got it out for you, and I understand it, but look at Anvil. Look at how many recruits you have. They believe in you. They… trust you, Billy, and want to work for you and with you.” His frown lessened, brow smoothing out. “People know you, Billy. That’s true, but they just recognize you. Think about how they look at Frank. He’s The Punisher, Billy. It doesn’t matter that his name was cleared, that’s still… God, and if you think people are afraid of you? Imagine how they feel about him.” You didn’t need to say it; the scarring on Billy’s face was a constant reminder of what Frank was capable of - and Billy had been his best friend. He had his reasons, but… 

 “You’re right.” Billy licked his lips, nodding. “You’re right a lot.” You winked at him, and before you could respond, Billy ducked his head to kiss you, hands leaving your hips, his arms circling your waist. “And they look nice.” He kissed you again, sighing. “The pumpkins I mean.” I know they do. “So what’s for dinner?” Laughing, you pinched his cheek and turned away from him. 

 “Chicken, Russo. Chicken and rice.” 

-- 

 “I hate costumes. There is no way in hell I am dressing up.” You fought back a smile, watching as Billy held the invitation up, shaking his head. “Karen thinks she can just-”

 “Billy, if Karen sent that invitation, and it says ‘costume required’, you will be wearing a costume, or you won’t be going.” You shrugged. “You know how she is, better than anyone except maybe Frank.” He grumbled, setting the invitation down on the countertop. “Let me see that.” Pushing it over toward you, Billy crossed his arms over his chest, watching silently as you picked up the card, eyes moving over it. Party at the Anvil facility the Saturday before Halloween. Costume mandatory for entry. “We’ll figure out a costume, Billy, it doesn’t have to be -” 

 “I’m not going.” He shrugged and your jaw dropped as you looked up at him. “If I don’t wear a costume, then I don’t have to -”

 “Billy, that’s bullshit.” You stepped over toward him and jabbed a finger into his chest, shaking your head. “They invited you. Karen wants you there. It’s our friends, Billy. Your friends.” He sighed, not meeting your eyes. “Look.” You pressed your lips together. “Come sit.” Leading him to the living room, he lowered himself onto the couch, pulling you down onto his lap and encircling you with his arms as you laid your head against his chest. You sat quietly for a few minutes, you thinking about what you wanted to say. He can only get mad, it’s not… “Billy, do you realize what Halloween is?” 

 “What?” He scoffed. “A holiday for kids to dress up and scare each other? For adults to get drunk and -”

 “It’s a chance to be someone or something else.” You sat straight up, fingers on the top of his head again, nails scratching over his scalp. “You think that people look at you funny? You don’t want them to see your face or see the scars? This is the perfect holiday for you. Wear a mask, put on face paint, whatever, but you don’t…” You closed your eyes, shaking your head. “You wanna be something different? You can be, for one night.” 

 “I already…” He sniffed. “For more than a year, I pretended to be someone else.” Oh. “I woke up every mornin’ and put on a goddamn suit and I went to work and it wasn’t me, but it was who I had to be.” His hand moved up and down your arm, the other one resting on your lap. “A lot of it’s still… not there yet, but I remember feelin’ like it wasn’t real, none of it.” He pulled you closer, and you felt his nose in your hair, lips pressed to your temple. “I remember the way you looked at me, the first time you saw me after I… when we weren’t together.” Oh, no. “That was real. And if that’s what it feels like to be someone else, I don’t want to. Not ever again.” 

 “Billy, that’s not what I meant.” You tilted your head, reaching up again to stroke his cheek with the back of your finger. “I know what you still think of yourself, right? You think that all of this makes you…” You swallowed. “Ugly. But it doesn’t. It’s a part of you, Russo. I told you once before that any of your scars coulda come from anything, and I still mean it. I don’t care that you have them. I’m always going to be proud to be seen with you.” His lips jerked, is if he was trying to conceal a smile, and you continued. “I love you, Billy. I never stopped, even after… even when you were in the hospital.” 

 “But you knew.” He shook his head, voice quiet. “You knew because you had all that shit I left you, and so you had… fuck, you had everything and it still almost wasn’t enough.” This isn’t even about Halloween anymore, what’s happening? “After what I did to you, you should have hated me. It doesn’t matter why -” 

 “Are you kidding me, Billy?” You sat up straight, shaking your head and shifting on his lap, your hands on his shoulders. “Never.” His eyes narrowed, darkening, but it wasn’t in the way you loved to see, instead it was what you’d gotten used to seeing when Billy was angry with himself. 

 “I’m not. Even knowing what you did, I can’t believe you didn’t just take all that money and leave me to fuckin’ rot in that hospital and then in jail. I didn’t actually do it, but I killed the Castles. I -”

 “Billy, you did it to save me.” Your voice quiet, you leaned in, pressing your forehead to his and shaking your head. “How could I abandon you? If you hadn’t ever met me, you would have warned Frank. You would have found a way to make it right. You wouldn’t have had to choose…” You paused, taking a deep breath. This hasn’t come up before, not like this. “I didn’t want your money, Billy. I wanted you. Just you. How many times am I gonna need to tell you that?” You felt the skin of his face tighten as he curled his lip, his hands gripping your hips. “I would have figured something out even if you hadn’t left me anything.” 

 You kissed him, lips pressing against his for a moment and then took a deep breath, trying to steady your heartbeat. You knew he still felt guilty and always would, even though he’d had a logical reason for making the decision he had. He’ll never feel as guilty as I do. You knew that even though Frank and Curtis were working with him at Anvil, there’d always be a chasm between the three of them even if it only existed in Billy’s still partially fractured mind. But there doesn’t have to be. “I thought I was gonna die that night, on the carousel?” Billy cleared his throat, voice low. “I figured I’d leave you everythin’ that meant anything to me, and so at least you’d know, right? I wouldn’t be here with you, but I… I didn’t deserve to be, so I was doin’ what I could to…”

 “Billy.” You closed your eyes and let out a breath, pulling your face back from his so that you could look into his eyes again. “You deserve to be here. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to …” You trailed off, eyes going to your left hand. “You did a lot of bad shit. You and Frank did a lot of bad shit, but you…”

 “I had a choice. We had a choice, at least somewhat. I didn’t have to… I was selfish. I wanted to be someone, and I took the coward’s way out, and I -”

 “Billy, you did what you had to do to survive. You didn’t start Cerberus. You didn’t start the heroin smuggling. You didn’t assign yourself all those shitty missions.” It’s not an excuse. Not at all. “You can’t tell a superior no over there, Billy. You had no reason to believe they were lying to you guys, and by the time you figured it out…” You shrugged. “It was too late. And then it was just you trying to keep your head above water.” Billy let go of your waist with one hand, his fingertips moving over your brow and then into your hair as he frowned, lower lip jutting out slightly. “I love you, Russo. It took me too long to say it before, and I know you didn’t want to hear it while you were in the hospital, but this is another chance for you - and for us - and I’m not going to waste it.”

 “It’s more’n the scars.” He sniffed, fingers curling in your hair and pulling gently. “It’s how I feel on the inside sometimes.” Billy paused and you waited, silently. He’d refused to see a psychiatrist after what had happened with the one they’d appointed him in the hospital, but you knew that he was still attending Curtis’ group sessions once a week and speaking with the man one-on-one more than that in an attempt to vocalize his feelings. “I feel…” Billy licked his lips. “I feel ugly. Like people can look at me and see everything that’s wrong with me.” Billy looked down, his other hand leaving your waist and you dropped yours from his shoulder, twining your fingers with his without hesitation. Giving his hand a squeeze, you continued to wait. “I… like with Madani.” You flinched at his use of her name, but gave no other reaction. “She looks at me and sees the man that killed her partner, the one that shot her, that didn’t give a shit about her, but still…” He let out a breath, the air leaving his lips in a shudder. “She looks at me like I look at me, like everyone should…”

 “Stop.” You spoke firmly. “Billy, she’s obsessed with you. She can’t… she looks at you that way because it helps her sleep at night to pretend she played no part in anything that happened. She used you for information about Frank, about Cerberus, about Rawlins and about everything. She let herself…’ Fall in love with you? Care about you? “...get in too deep, too quick, and it backfired on her, and she doesn’t know how to handle that. They tried to pin everything on you and Lewis because they didn’t want to admit that the CIA was…” You shook your head. “She still thinks you’re faking it, I’m sure of it, thinks you remember everything and that…”

 “I remember her, but I don’t remember her.” He leaned in, breath warm against your cheek as his mouth moved toward your ear. “An’ I kinda hope that I never do, because…” He stopped. “Because I don’t know what would be worse - remembering that I was just usin’ her too, or remembering that part of me cared about her.” You knew that this was possible; Billy hadn’t been able to remember what his feelings for the woman had truly been, but you weren’t worried, even though you knew it bothered him not to know. “I know I didn’t love her.” He sighed, mouth lingering against your skin. “I know that for sure, but…” You moved your hand to the back of his head, fingers spread out against the soft, close cropped hair. I know. “But we’re gettin’ sidetracked,” he murmured, teeth closing gently around your earlobe. “How’d we go from talkin’ about Halloween to talkin’ about her?” You shrugged, unwilling to separate from him even though it seemed that the topic was closed for the moment. Oh well. “If I gotta dress up, I guess I have to pick a costume.”

 “No mask?”

 “No mask.” He kissed your cheek, pulling away and leaning against the back of the couch, his hand dropping from your head to your shoulder and giving you a small smile. “I can’t hide this. They’re part of me now, right?” You nodded. “We’ll figure it out. But right now?” He cocked his head to the side, the small smile replaced with a larger, more genuine one. “We need to eat, because I had a long day at work and you know what that means.” You bit your lip and stared at him for a few seconds before pulling yourself off of his lap, holding a hand out to him. Cheeks growing warm, you nodded. I know exactly what that means. 

 --- 

 “Billy, we’re going to be late!” You were finishing with your accessories - slipping on large, gold hoop earrings and securing your gun belt around your waist and over your shoulder. “I’m going to call the Uber, and…” He didn’t respond, so you rolled your eyes, turning away from the mirror and reaching for your hat. In the time between receiving the invitation from Karen and the night of the party, you and Billy had traded ideas for costumes with each other - and when he’d finally told you that he chose something for himself, you’d been thrilled. It’s about damn time. 

 You’d picked your costume out quickly, opting for a pirate outfit that consisted of an off the shoulder white blouse with billowy sleeves that was long enough for the tattered ends to double as the bottom layer of the skirt, peeking out from beneath the actual skirt - royal blue with golden edging and a layer of black lace. A blue, white and gold brocade-patterned vest, a pair of over-the knee- black boots and your hair secured over one shoulder with the ends curled completed the look. Perfect. 

 Billy wasn’t downstairs either, and as you moved from room to room, searching, you began to worry. I didn’t hear him leave, where is he? By the time you made your way back into the front hall, phone in hand, you were considering calling him, but the creak of the steps stopped you. Eyes moving up, you felt your breath catch as you saw Billy’s legs descending the stairs. Oh my God. He was wearing a suit - not one of the ones he’d worn during the trial, but a new one, the sleek material clinging to his body in all the right places, and though you’d seen him naked plenty of times, felt his body beneath your hands and mouth, you were struck by how much healthier he looked, how much he’d filled out after leaving the hospital. “Billy, I -” He reached the bottom of the steps, hand gripping the railing and your words caught in your throat again as you saw his face. Billy had been growing his beard out for almost two weeks, refusing to shave, not even cleaning up his neck… and now you knew why. Though short and sparse in some areas, Billy’s facial hair was back to how it had been prior to him leaving you, prior to him getting into the fight with Frank. He looks… and his hair, rather than being so short it was almost buzzed was almost long enough for you to tug on, the front already growing back into the casual drape over one eye that you’d missed. Holy shit. 

 He eyed you, not speaking as you did the same to him, gaze lingering on the way his hands looked, emerging from the ends of his sleeves, the way that the jacket was pulled taut over his broad chest, the way his tie - a deep red - was knotted tightly around his throat, standing out from the bright white of the shirt beneath it. He’d always looked good in suits, but you’d never thought that he would choose to wear one as a costume. His face, he… The look on Billy’s face was familiar to you; a cool, collected confidence that was enhanced by the set of his jaw, the faint gleam in his eyes. This isn’t Billy, it’s Mr. Russo. Is this his idea of a costume? The thought - and a slight discomfort with it - only stayed in your mind for seconds until Billy spoke. “You like?” He raised one eyebrow, the smirk on his face growing and you finally laughed, clapping your hands as you stepped toward him, one hand going to his chest. 

 “That’s so good, Billy.” The smirk had revealed one pointed tooth, but your reaction caused him to smile broadly, revealing the other. Vampire Billy. Jesus take the wheel. The hand not on the railing reached into his pocket, pulling out a flask that was made to look like a blood bag and you laughed again, shaking your head. “It’s simple, but it’s good.” He stepped down and toward you, causing you to step backwards, his hand wrapping around your waist as he pressed his lips to yours gently, not wanting to smudge your lipstick. “C’mon, I’ll order the car, we can wait out on the porch.” 

 Pulling out of his grip, you opened the app on your phone, entered in the address for Anvil, and ordered the ride, telling Billy that it would be to your place in ten minutes before turning and walking out the front door, skirt moving around your thighs. 

 “You can’t wear that in public.” Billy spoke from behind you, still standing in the doorway. “That skirt… everyone’s gonna look at you and…” You looked over your shoulder at him, setting your hat and phone down on the brick ledge. Yeah, it’s Halloween, that’s the point. “You gotta put on pants or tights or somethin’...” He frowned, biting down gently on his lower lip, the points of his teeth visible in the overhead light. 

 “That’s why I picked it, Billy.” You stepped toward him, reaching up for his tie. “Wanted you to have easy access.” His eyes widened and you tugged him forward, fingers closing around the silk. “Putting pants on would defeat the purpose.” He sighed, lowering his face to yours as the door closed behind him. “Besides…” Your teeth grazed his cheek. “Anyone that would hit on me at Anvil in front of you has a death wish.” Billy finally laughed, arms going around your waist. 

 “You’re right.” He kissed you on the jaw, sighing again. “Was your costume expensive?” You shook your head, telling him no, and before you could get another word out, he spoke again. “Good.” One of his arms rose, taking your hair into his hand and pulling your head to the side, exposing your neck to him. You cried out as you felt a pinch against your skin, Billy biting down, and then the next thing you knew, you felt a warm liquid trailing down your neck and toward your blouse’s collar. He fucking bit me? Your grip on his tie tightened and you pushed against his hip with your other hand. 

 “Billy! What…” He stood up straight and your eyebrows shot up as you saw red around his mouth and dripping down his chin. “Is that red syrup? Please tell me it’s syrup.” Billy grinned, shrugging his shoulders as his tongue moved across his lower lip, your hand pulling away from his tie to go toward your neck. “Billy, you bit...”

 “It’s fake blood. Stop.” He pulled your hand up to his mouth, stopping you from touching your own skin and dropping another kiss to the inside of your wrist, leaving another bloody mark there. “Now it looks like -” You cut him off as you lunged forward, mouth on his as you kissed him hard, tongue slipping past his lips as you raised both arms, hands moving through his hair. He held you close, and though you knew that when you pulled apart, you’d have the fake blood all over your mouth and lower face, you didn’t care. He’s trying to make sure… Billy before the Incident wouldn’t have worried that you’d look elsewhere - that you’d let anyone else catch your eye… but now? He was terrified that you’d wake up one day and look at him, deciding the scars and his past were too much. Since you were pulling him out of his comfort zone and into the center of a large crowd for the party, he was doing his best to take control of the situation -  marking you as his, as if the large diamond on your finger wouldn’t do the job. Billy pulled back from you to take a breath, the tips of his fangs catching on your lower lip as he straightened his shoulders. “I - shit.” You frowned, unsure of why he’d stopped - until you heard another voice. 

 “Going somewhere, Russo?” This fucking bitch.

 Billy’s entire demeanor changed as you turned to face the street, fighting to keep your expression even as your eyes landed on the petite woman standing on the sidewalk in front of you. “What do you want, Dinah?” The way he said her name, nearly spitting the word from his lips did nothing to stop you from thinking of how it had sounded months before, them talking over drinks, in her bed, in her office… Stop. “We’re a little busy here.” The woman laughed, stepping closer to you and you watched as she put her hands on her hips, leaning forward. 

 “Yeah, I can see that. Guess even now you can’t help yourself when it comes to women and blood.” You felt Billy freeze next to you, his arm still around your waist, and you were suddenly reminded that you were in fact messy with fake blood, as was Billy’s face. “Maybe if you’re lucky, he’ll help you clean it off later,” she sneered at you, shaking her head. “He’s good at that.” She’s trying to rile you up. But you’d seen the video, Billy in the  interrogation room, talking about how he’d bathed the blood from her body, how he’d been in her bed, the words falling from his lips with no emotion behind them, no life in his eyes. “I just wanted to congratulate the two of you.” Madani shook her head, licking her lips. “I never manage to catch both of you at the same time, and I didn’t want to waste the sentiment.” Her eyes moved up Billy’s frame and you caught the slight intake of breath as she finally laid eyes on his face, the worst of the scarring hidden by his beard - looking almost exactly as it had when she’d met him. “What a catch, hmm? A mass murderer? Someone with no remorse?” Her eyes moved to you, and though she was nearly ten feet away, you caught a glimmer of frustration behind the anger in them before she spoke again. “ You believe he’s changed? You accepted the bullshit story -”

 “We’re done here.” Billy straightened and you tore your eyes away from Madani, looking up at him. “You need to leave. I don’t care who you are, this is where I live, and you’re not welcome here, Madani.” The other woman laughed turning to the side and gesturing toward the sidewalk. 

 “I’m on the sidewalk, Billy.” She shrugged. “Just taking a walk.” No, you’re harassing him. Us. Before you could say anything else, your phone pinged and a gray SUV pulled up in the empty space behind Madani. Thank God. You pulled away from Billy, walking to grab your hat and your phone before you made your way down the steps. Billy followed closely, one hand on your lower back, fingers barely applying pressure, but as you reached the bottom of the steps, Madani’s hand shot out, grabbing your elbow. “You’re going to regret this. Regret him.” 

 Tearing your arm from her grip, you took a step closer, eyes narrowing. “No, I won’t. I’m not you.” Without another word, you turned away, reaching for the handle on the SUV’s back door, sliding into it, Billy close behind. Though you didn’t turn around as the car pulled away from the curb, you knew what you would have seen if you did - Madani, with a smug look on her face still standing on your sidewalk. The driver eased into traffic and you finally took a deep breath, closing your eyes. She just wanted to ruin your night, she had to know about the party somehow. 

 “I’m sorry about her.” Billy’s mouth was close to your ear, his voice low. “We can move, I got the money, we can -”

 “No. She’s not going to chase us from our house, Billy.” You sighed, leaning into his chest. “We’ll move when we’re ready, she’s just trying to piss me off and get you to react.” He kissed the top of your head. “I hate her, Billy, but I feel sorry for her, too.” He asked you why, and you shrugged your shoulders. “Not because of you, but because it’s been over a year and she’s… she’s still stuck, Billy. It’s like what the court decided wasn’t good enough for her, even though it was enough for everyone else.” He coughed, leaning down to speak into your ear. 

 “I shot her, you know. One day we were sleepin’ together and the next… she found out about me, an’ then I…” He swallowed, burying his face in your hair and inhaling deeply. “She’s never gonna leave me alone, not til she gets what she wants.” But what does she want? “She’s not gonna get it, though… because I have nothin’ for her.” Deciding to let things go for the night, you blinked, turning your gaze toward the window and watching as the lights passed in a blur. Billy didn’t speak again until the driver had stopped in front of the low brick building that housed Anvil’s headquarters, letting you out onto the sidewalk. “Don’t you dare bend over,” he said as he walked behind you, one hand stuffed into his pocket. “I mean it, if I even catch a glimpse of someone else starin’ at your ass…” You laughed, reaching for the door handle. 

 “Don’t worry, Billy. I’ll make sure if I do bend over, it’s in front of you.” He scoffed, but before he could reply, you were inside the lobby, the music that you’d been unable to hear through the soundproof exterior walls and doors filling your ears. Reaching back for Billy’s hand, you led him to the main training room, which had been off limits for the previous two days as Karen, Marci and Curtis’ girlfriend decorated. Damn, this looks incredible. The whole space had been transformed, and even Billy let out a low whistle as his eyes moved over the crowd; people in various costumes spread out through the open space. 

 You saw Foggy and Marci - the woman dressed like a cat and Foggy wearing a lab coat and stethoscope, but before you could move toward them, you heard Karen’s voice calling your name. “You look amazing!” Turning to face her, you grinned as you saw her costume - a tight black dress that showed off her long legs, the only adornments a big silver buckle on her waist and another on her pointed hat, which sat askew on top of her head, golden curls cascading down her back. She had a broom in one hand, holding it off to the side as she hugged you, her eyes widening as she took in the side of your body that Billy had had his mouth on. “A...bloody pirate?” You grinned and shook your head, pointing at Billy. “He’s just wearing a…” But he reached his hand out and Karen put her free one into it, watching as Billy brought it up to his lips. 

 You saw the slight movement in his jaw as he bit down on one side and heard Karen’s surprised gasp as she pulled her hand away, a glistening red spot where Billy’s mouth had been. “Not just a suit, Miss Page.” Karen laughed and Billy grinned, showing off his fangs as he pulled you to his side. Karen pointed out the food stations and the photo booth, and just as you were about to drag Billy away, he cleared his throat. “Where’s, ah… where’s Frank?” Karen’s smile never faltered as she gestured toward the bar, and before you could stop her, she’d stepped forward, linking her arm with Billy’s. 

 “We’ll go see him.” Billy hesitated - you all felt it - but still walked forward and toward it. Curtis was standing in front of it dressed as Captain America with his girlfriend, Delia, who’d chosen to dress as an angel. Fitting. But Frank’s costume actually made you laugh, the sound erupting from your mouth before you could contain it. Billy’s going to kill me. 

 Hearing you, Frank turned, beer in hand and his eyes moved over you and then Karen before finally settling on Billy. “Hi, Bill.” Frank swallowed, raising his beer to his lips, and before the tension got too thick, the man cleared his throat. “Want a beer?” Billy nodded next to you and you felt him relax. 

 “If I’da known that I could get away with wearin’ a military uniform…” The five of you laughed, Frank handing Billy a beer bottle, which he raised and took a long drink from immediately. “Nah, I’m kiddin’, I don’t think I’ll be wearin’ a uniform again any time soon, but it suits you, Frankie.” The nickname slipped from his mouth before Billy could stop it, and though you heard his breath catch, Frank just grinned and reached over, arm going around Karen’s shoulders. “It does, doesn’t it, Bill.” The six of you made small talk until your stomach growled and Billy excused the two of you to get food, his hand never leaving your body. 

 “Thank you,” he said as you loaded up your plates with finger foods. For? “For makin’ me come here.” Billy swallowed, one hand moving to the back of his head. “I needed it.” We both did. You ate silently for a few minutes and then Billy cleared his throat, raising an eyebrow. “When you’re done, we should go upstairs.” He paused, running his tongue over his teeth, eyes darkening. “Got somethin’ to show you in my office.” 

 Setting your plate down, you nodded, heart beating quickly. “I’m done now, Billy.”

---

[letterboxd]

How I Letterboxd #7: Cinemonster.

Hooptober’s head honcho opens up to Jack Moulton about his love for Texas-born horror director Tobe Hooper, the joys of running Letterboxd’s most beloved Hallowe’en community challenge, and the “terrifying, magical” experience of seeing Frankenstein at the age of four.

“You can’t spell October without Tobe.” —Cinemonster

Cinemonster, known to his family and friends as David Hood, is a restaurateur in Pittsburgh by day, and the head honcho of Hooptober by night. Now in its seventh year, the horror film challenge sees participants set their own 31-day viewing agenda of 31 films, curated according to a list of criteria set by its creator.

‘The Texas Chain Saw Massacre’ (1974), directed by Tobe Hooper.

With over 5,000 films logged on Letterboxd and a growing collection of posters, DVDs, Blu-rays, laser discs and film memorabilia, Cinemonster is a literal monster of cinema. He has created more than 500 lists, including a ton of year, director, actor, actress, franchise and memoriam lists.

What brought you to Letterboxd? I found Letterboxd while I was doing a Google search for a horror film that I had forgotten the name of. I ran into a list that Hollie Horror had made and wound up starting a profile and it went from there. That would have been a little over seven years ago.

How freakin’ cool is last year’s Hallowe’en Easter egg with the dripping blood from our logo? [Pro members get this added to their pages by mentioning #horror in their bio.] I’m a fan.

Unfortunately I haven’t heard of a single one of your four profile favorites! What’s urging you to highlight these films? They are just lesser-seen and have something good or great about them. Eyeball is a great little underseen Umberto Lenzi film. Death Machines is an awkward, weird and wonderful film with kung fu and blood. Massacre at Central High is one of my favorite films and sadly lacking a disc release of any kind—anyone who has seen Heathers will recognize a couple of things if they watch it. Rituals is a criminally underseen stalked in the woods film from the ’70s.

In this this list description, you explain how the original Frankenstein (1931) hooked you into horror at four years old. Can you describe what you most remember about that life-changing experience? It was both magical and terrifying. The space, the creature, the little girl. I had trouble sleeping for weeks afterwards. No matter where I am in the world, if there is a screening of Frank, I’ll go. I watched most of the major universals by the time I was six or seven. I saw Alien and Jaws 2 with my folks and those stuck with me. Cable and a local UHF station showing Hammer films on Saturdays are what really allowed me to get sucked in.

‘Frankenstein’ (1931), directed by James Whale.

The horror films of 1980 and 1981 were the most impactful and are the ones that mean the most to me to this day; Fade to Black, Night School, Motel Hell, The Fog, Alligator, Altered States, Terror Train, Death Ship, Scanners, An American Werewolf in London, The Howling, The Funhouse, Dead & Buried, Hell Night, Wolfen, Ghost Story, The Pit and Evilspeak. I saw all of them five to ten-plus times on cable as a kid. They’re still all high on my list. I am glad that Fade to Black is on Shudder. People need to watch it. More relevant now than then.

What exactly provoked you to start Hooptober seven years ago? I moved into an old spooky house and had a backlog of Blu-rays to watch and the 4K of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre was about to come out. I’d done some interactive stuff on Letterboxd previously and had a decent amount of people involved. I was also at a point in my life where 31 films in 31 days is tough, as it is for a lot of us now. So I thought ‘Why don’t I do something that starts a little early, clears some of my list out, and has some parameters that don’t feel like I am handing out an assignment?’ I grew up in Texas, Tobe [Hooper] is close to my heart, and with all the Hooper I owned and the 4K coming out, I decided to christen it with his name. You can’t spell October without Tobe.

What’s the most members that have participated in a Hooptober? The number of people who participated was a little more than I expected, but that wasn’t what I was surprised by. I never thought of it as a recurring event until I started to hear from people the following summer about ‘the next one’. I just kinda chuckled after about a dozen people had asked and I said out loud to no one, “I guess I’m doing another one of these”. We are well over 700 this year, and still climbing.

‘Fade to Black’ (1980), directed by Vernon Zimmerman.

Where do you get the ideas for the rules for films to consider watching? At this point, I look back at past years so that I don’t repeat myself. I look to the current year for inspiration. Is there a film from a sub-genre that was prominent? Was it a strong year for output from women, Mexico, Asia, Black filmmakers, something cultural, and so on? I may focus on effects creators, an actor or writer on a whim. I try to keep an eye out for blind spots I haven’t covered. Shudder, archive.org, the big streamers are all resources. Sadly, rarefilmm no longer exists.

In last year’s interview with Merry-Go-Round magazine, you mentioned plans to turn Hooptober into a film festival. How’s that going? In a post-pandemic world, how can we keep independent niche film festivals thriving? The world has not been agreeable, obviously. I’m not even sure how viable something like that will be next year. I’ve been taking a look at streaming options. Post-pandemic will require more creativity and outside-the-box thinking, and will probably continue to feed some drive-ins. Been a while since more than a handful of people wanted to put money into a drive-in, which is nice to see.

I’m going to do a tweet along to The Witch Who Came From the Sea in October, and I’ll give you an exclusive here: The George Romero Foundation and I are doing online Horror Trivia on October 11. I had been doing it live with them here in Pittsburgh until the pandemic.

Based on this year’s rules and conditions, if there was one essential you-can’t-miss film you could force all your participants to add to their challenge, which film would it be? Demons, Eve’s Bayou or The Witch Who Came From the Sea.

‘The Witch Who Came from the Sea’ (1976), directed by Matt Cimber.

What have been your own greatest film discoveries through your Hooptober adventures? A Tale of Two Sisters, I Drink Your Blood, Blood Diner, and though it is a bit of a cheat to list this one, The Amusement Park. It’s cheating because it didn’t exist as something that I or anyone else could have watched, prior to when I saw it.

Do you have any acclaimed horror movies still lingering in your list of shame? Eyes Without a Face, Upgrade, Cure and Scream 4.

Have you ever completed one of your own Hooptober challenges yet? Errrrrrrrrr, one. I’m on track this year.

What about the participants over the years—any Letterboxd friends you’ve made who would you like to give a shout-out to? Aaron, Sarah Jane and Chris Duck are people that I talk to outside of Letterboxd. There have been a few others over the years. Slappy McGee has helped me with Hooptober the last two years. They are great. Javo and David Lawrence are pretty great, too.

Before Hooptober, many of your lists invited discussion with your followers. In what ways is Letterboxd the ideal forum to foster a community of film fans? Fans exercise their fandom in so many ways. The platform is so flexible that it allows you to utilize it in a small and personal way, in a promotional way, or to dive into the community pool and see who’s out there that shares something with you or can show you something. The more people that we are exposed to and listen to, we are all the better for.

Which of your review—from any genre—are you proudest of? The Invisible Man or The Hustler, probably. I have a capsule of Hud that I like.

So, you’re the horror guy. Nobody is denying that. You are Cinemonster, after all. But when I look at your top movies list and see that Singin’ in the Rain is your all-time number one, I’ll need you to explain yourself. I go back and forth between that and Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. They are 1A and 1B in some order. Singin’ in the Rain is a perfect film and the studio system at its best. I will ignore your implied insult. ;)

‘Fear of a Black Hat’ (1993), directed by Rusty Cundieff.

It’s true, even a horror aficionado needs some levity in their life. What other comedies pick you up from a dark place? Fear of a Black Hat always does the trick. Same with The Awful Truth, Murder by Death, Hollywood Shuffle, Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story, Blazing Saddles, Monty Python and the Holy Grail and Black Dynamite.

Who has been keeping you company during this tough year? I have watched thirteen Spike Lee films so far this year. I’ve taken a break the last few months, but I’ll probably knock out five or six more. With the exception of 25th Hour, everything is a revisit. It’s been a joy to go back through everything. Crooklyn is much stronger than I remembered, and Bamboozled just gets better and more impactful as time passes. I have loved Spike since the day I saw School Daze. His films have always connected with things that are important to me and to those that have been around me. Lee is still grossly under-appreciated as a narrative film director and a documentarian.

We’re bowing down to your epic Blu-ray and DVD collection. Which ones are your most prized possessions? Make us jealous. I have an Anchor Bay DVD of Dawn of the Dead signed by the cast and George A. Romero, a steelbook of Battle Royale, the first Slumber Party Massacre set before they had to reprint the box, the original Star Wars trilogy on Blu. I’m sure there are things I’m not thinking of. I have a lot of out-of-print and laser-only stuff. I’ll never get rid of my Holy Grail, Ghostbusters and Akira Criterion laser discs.

A selection of Cinemonster’s signed memorabilia.

I have a copy of Painting with Light signed by John Alton, John Waters and Steven Soderbergh I’ll send you a picture of. I used to collect movie posters, and I have the original Revenge of the Jedi one-sheet and the Drew Struzan Squirm poster. I do love those.

From your top directors list, let’s put one horror director on a pedestal. Who does the genre better than anyone else and why? George. They’re always topical, intelligent, thoughtful, personal and sometimes prescient. At their best they hold up both a mirror and a crystal ball. He was writing found-footage scripts in the early 70s, for god’s sake. Tobe is grossly under-appreciated. James Whale and Mario Bava could scare you in so many ways.

So, thinking beyond Ari Aster, Robert Eggers and Jordan Peele, which up-and-coming horror directors are you most excited about? Issa López, Gigi Saúl Guerrero, Benson and Moorhead, Shinichiro Ueda, Na Hong-jin, Julia Ducournau, Nia DaCosta, Jeremy Gardner and Leigh Whannell.

The 2010s were a great decade for horror. We have more money on-screen, moving away from the low-budget films of the 2000s. Which favorite horror film of the last decade inspired you the most? Get Out. What Jordan did for generations to come is unmatched in this century.

Chucky from ‘Child’s Play’ (1988).

Which probably-too-long horror franchise gets too much flak and is top-to-bottom a great time? Child’s Play. Chucky has always been treated generally as second tier. [That franchise] has tried a lot of interesting and out-there things during its lifespan that had no business working, but did.

I know it’s been a slow year but you haven’t logged many 2020 movies yet! Which is your most anticipated horror movie of 2020 or 2021? Peninsula, for sure; I love Train to Busan. Then Candyman, The Dark and the Wicked, Grizzly II: Revenge, Bad Hair, #Alive, After Midnight, The Platform, Bulbbul, Underwater, Shirley and Swallow.

Interview by Jack Moulton. Follow Jack on Letterboxd.

[fortysevenswrites]

2019 A Year In Fic

According to my AO3 stats, I wrote 75,129 words this year.

Coming in to 2019, I planned to write 0 words. So, that’s wild.

Many of you don’t know this, but from 2015 to the end of 2016, I spent every inch of my free time working on an original fiction manuscript that I intended to see published. But then, 2017 happened, and my family imploded. Because so much of what I was working on was tied to my family’s bullshit, I haven’t been able to touch my manuscript. Thanks trauma, you’re a bitch.

But in February of this year, I started actually noticing those Kastle gifs from TPS1.11 in my dashboard, the infamous elevator scene, and finally decided to see what that’s all about. Took me long enough, I know.

And writing for Kastle, along with being a lot of fun, has also helped me re-learn how to write fiction. And that’s going to help once I get back into my manuscript, which IS going to happen in 2020, because it’s been long enough and I can’t—I won’t—let me family and it’s epic fuck-up stop me from getting what I want.

It also needs to be said that none of this would have happened had @ck90 not started cheerleading my way back into writing, courtesy of her story, I See Heroes, which is one of my favorite Kastle AUs.

In honor of the end of 2019, I wanted to give a little BTS commentary about the fics I wrote this year:

I Wouldn’t Know Where To Start (One-shot, 6,644 words) All of this happened because @ck90 dedicated Death Was an Invited Guest, which is an absolute delight of a post TPS2 romp, to me. I love me a good fix-it, and I Wouldn’t Know Where To Start is exactly that. Some TPS1 callbacks, some expanded interactions between two characters who briefly met during TPS2, and Louboutins. What more could you want?

There Is No Easy Way To Explain (One-shot, 4,436 words) Part 2 of the These Shoes Are Made ForWalking ‘verse, came about because of that throwaway line in Part 1 about Marci being convinced that Karen had a secret boyfriend. The idea of Marci finding out about Karen’s relationship with Frank, and about Matt being Daredevil was just something I could not pass up, especially after reading chapter 7 of @the-restless-brook’s BRILLIANT story Carrying.

And World Peace (5 Chapters, 30,631 words) My first long-fic that I’ve written in YEARS, this was a birthday gift for @nxbodygoesafterher, which took me about a million and a half years to write. Having Karen embody Agent Grace Hart was a lot of fun, as was adapting the movie to be a little less—early 2000s ew, you know? One of my favorite parts was the relationship between Karen and Billy, and this fic is probably going to be the first and only that sees Billy as not being a villain. Because I have plans in future fics, and none of them are going to look kindly on Mr. Russo.

After (One-shot collection, 4,585 words) This collection came about because every once in a while, I decide that it’s a cool idea to challenge myself to write something short. The goal for this collection is that all the fics will be around 1,000 words, and I do have plans for a couple more entries going into 2020. Part one, 5 Things Frank Learned From Sephora, is ALL @ck90’s fault, and the other three, The Farce, Man and Man’s Best Friend, and Road Rash were all written in October when I was on a cruise down to the Mexican Riviera with my family.

5 Times Someone Asked Karen Where The Punisher Is Now (One-shot, 4,781 words) This was originally intended to be an entry into After, but then it got really, really long. I don’t know why I started writing it, especially with all 800 WIPs I have, but I did. My favorite conversation in this fic has to be the one between Karen and Trish, because I choose which pieces of canon to accept, and which ones to ignore, and I ignore the shit out of a LOT in the NMCU. I also love playing with the post-TPS1 timeline, and have a lot more plans to do that in 2020.

watching over someone from afar (One-shot, 24,052 words) Written as part of @kastlenetwork’s Kastle Secret Santa 2019 for @goddamnitkastle, this is by far one of my favorite fics that I wrote in 2019. When Megan prompted me with her Kastle playlist, I KNEW I was going to go with Taylor Swift’s The Archer. The drama, the intensity, Karen and Frank’s attempts to navigate their relationship in the wake of their conversation in the hospital, was so much fun. I never expected it to end up as long as it was, but hey, that’s what happens when you let the characters run the show, I guess. I also loved being able to get Karen and Sarah Lieberman in the room together, that is also something that is going to happen more often in 2020.

What’s coming next?| I have about 800 million WIPs and fics that I want to tackle in 2020, starting with what I’m calling What’s In The Folder, a post TPS1 AU, where Karen gets some startling news that leads her to the Lieberman’s, and ultimately means Karen and Frank taking a cross-country road trip to make right a massive, devastating wrong.

After What’s In The Folder, I’m probably going to tackle The Big Indulgence (I mean, they’re all indulgences, but this is my BIG one), one of the first long-fic ideas I came up with when I started thinking about fic again. This TPS1 AU will see the N actually being put into the NMCU, with Karen befriending the likes of Pepper Potts, Darcy Lewis, and Natasha Romanov while navigating her career as a reporter. There will be the discovery of a surprising familial relationship, a serious crisis, and Tony Stark making a “Harold, they’re lesbians” reference. Also, Frank might be a little psychic.

I also have the New Orleans indulgence, the Kastle Star Trek Discovery AU, the Cruise AU, the Soulmate AU that @ninzied prompted me with a million years ago based on Halsey’s song Colors, the time travel fic that will see not one, but TWO Franks protecting Karen, the third in the These Shoes Are Made For Walking ‘verse, which will see Karen and Frank attending the world’s most awkward dinner party, the fourth in the These Shoes Are Made For Walking ‘verse, inspired by Amy Rutberg’s episode of TLC’s Say Yes To The Dress, the one post TPS2 where Karen meets Beth, the role-swap AU that will see Karen as the Punisher and Frank as the intrepid reporter, and so freaking many more.

Even though we might not be getting any more new The Punisher content anytime soon, I’m not letting that stop me from continuing to churn out fic. I’ve got so many ideas and they’re so much fun to write, so I’m going to do it, and I can’t wait to see what else the fandom comes up with in 2020.

You’re all amazing, you’re my favorites, and I’m wishing each and every one of you a happy, happy new year!