#and then he psychologically manipulated everyone to go through the same trauma that is letting your children move out after 6000 years

[cometrose]

its kind of funny when people say zhongli is stuck in the past or can’t move on when his entire fucking story is how he doesn’t do that

[bloop-bl00p]

“Fîls de joie” What Poison could have been.

TW: Mention of Sexual Assault, Sexual Abuse, Rape, Drugs, Addiction, Manipulation, Mention of Fetish and sex in general, mention of Sex works, Raphielle II don’t go harras him and respect his pronouns

I’m trying to be a writer and I understand writing about taboos and controversial things is difficult. I only write about what I know which is the effect of emotional and physical abuse and religious traumas. Notheless if I’m trying to do something out of my domain of expertise I’ll research it to respect the concerned part of the audience.

Vivienne Medrano said that people who’ve been sexually abused helped write episode 4. Part of me wants to believe it, it’s most likely true, it’s the best thing a writer can do, let knowledgeable people help and not just rely on sites about psychology. But, with how rape and assault are presented sometimes it really feels like she’s lying.

Angel Dust is the only character whose abuse is presented as serious.

Stolas kept belittling Bliztø and kept talking dirty even when the Man was in danger

You cannot tell me that he couldn't hear the gunshot through the phone, in this scene, he keeps making his disgusting speech. Blitzø was practically forced to make the deal as he wasn't in a situation where he could process his thoughts clearly since he was trying to survive

And it was a joke.

Angels Dusk kept harassing Husk throughout the series but he never once apologized. Yes, it stopped after Looser Baby but he should have a mindful conversation with Husk and genuinely say sorry about his behavior.

“It starts with sowwy🥺” What’s the point of having this song if the characters don’t follow through with the lesson?

Those scenes were mostly jokes.

And I haven’t mentioned Sir Pentious getting dragged while being drunk in a sex room, or Moxie being kissed by Succubus despite mentioning he didn't want any of that.

AAaaAaaaAh look at these men, being uncomfortable because they are touched and talked down despite verbally addressing their discomfort! That hilarious!

I want to believe she cares, I’m a fan of these shows, I know it doesn't look like it but I’ve been hooked since the Pilots. Not only was I disappointed at the final result but I was also shocked to learn Medrano is simply just an asshole with too much money in her bag.

Poison failed where Fîls de Joie succeeded:

Before reading any of what I wrote you should listen to it, there are English subtitles. And honestly, it's a good song on its own.

What’s the context of Fîls de Joie?

A sex worker died and her son is holding funerals for her. You can guess it with the wordplay in the title, Fille de Joie (Girl of Joy) is one of the many ways to say prostitute in French. Fîls (son) de Joie is a way to say that he’s the son of a sex worker.

While sung by the same man, you can notice that Stromae gives us four POVs in the song, the son in the chorus, a client, the pimp, and a policeman.

Everyone besides the son is a hypocrite and relatively an asshole. But even if those verses are self-centered and a pathetic attempt from these men to bring sympathy to themselves, despite never hearing the story directly from the Woman, you can guess exactly how her life was and you sympathize with her. It tells us a story, her story.

This woman was a good mother, and it shows how much the son insisted on leaving her alone, speaking proudly of her despite acknowledging her flaws, and even repeatedly calling her a hero.

But HEY! (But HEY!) Leave my mom alone Yes I know, she’s not perfect, it’s true She’s a hero (She’s a hero) And I will always speak of her with pride

The client is trying to be excused from his actions by stating he’s lonely and addicted to it.

Being alone is not easy And it’s been years since my last time

The hardest part, well, it’s the first time And now what’s hard is to decide when the last time will be

But he’s also verbally violent even stating that as long as he got the money he could pretty much do everything to her.

Maybe this time around we can do it with me insulting her. Yeah everything is negotiablе in life, if you got the money And after all, I’m probably her best customer

With that alone, you can probably guess that it’s not the only violent client she had but she has to endure it because she needs money. Considering that she has a son it’s probably to support his education or something related to her well-being and his.

Then comes the pimp, he brushed off all of his misdeeds by saying he gives them shelter and food and should be grateful for it.

Why does everyone hate me? I’m the one feeding them Their lives would be way more mediocre. Without me, their lives would be shitty

Not only that but his good actions are not for the sake of it, he should have his part of the deals. He doesn't want them to feel like princesses eventually calling them hookers in a very dehumanizing way.

That has a price, Missy. Well duh, in this life, everything comes at a price. Nobody ever told you? They say I’m guilty of human trafficking But 50, 40, 30 or 20% is not nothing

They better not delude themselves and think they’re models Ladies—or should I say: hookers!

Not only does this woman have to endure constant violent behavior from her clients she barely gets enough money despite being the one at work, receiving either 50% or even 20% of what she actually gained. The rest goes to an egocentric pimp that only sees her as merchandise.

While we can technically understand where the policeman is coming from, he’s just doing his job, he’s making a mistake apparent in the other’s verse but much more evident in his.

He doesn't see her as a human.

I know that it’s your job But I gotta do mine, don’t I?

Take back your ID and what’s left of your dignity You’re pathetic, pfft Find yourself a real job!

This song doesn't tell us the story of a prostitute but the story of a financially struggling Mother who juggles between abusing clients and a society that only focuses on the top of the iceberg, the fact that she’s selling her body.

Stromae tries to appeal to our compassion and teach us that it’s important to understand why someone will go their way to sell sex for a few pennies. And rather than rejecting them, we should help them.

Another thing I like about the clip as a whole is the Military. They don’t have a Belgian or French uniform but they wear multiple of them to show that this dehumanization isn’t linked to one country but it’s global, every countries and cultures take part in it, and it needs to be fixed.

What does Poison tell us?

Angel got stuck in an abusive situation and was forced to do sex work for his pimps, it focuses more on the sexual assault rather than his life.

He obliviously regrets his choice resulting in him blaming himself for getting into such a messy situation. A situation he’s seemingly addicted to despite himself, he knows it’s bad but he can’t help it.

What's the worst part of this hell? I can only blame myself

You're feedin' me poison Addicted to this feelin', I can't help but swallow. Up your poison

The poison can also be a metaphor for the drugs he seems to take directly from Valentino’s brand. A drug he either takes himself or is forced to inhale.

He uses the same substance to forget his situation and numbs the pain while also putting on a false Sex-addicted mask to convey that he’s fine and stay on Valentino’s good side. A direct consequence of his abuse is his addiction and his hypersexuality.

I got so good at bein' untrue I got so good at tellin' you what you wanna hear I disassociate, disappear

At the end of the song he’s waisted, traumatized, and finally breaks down as he finally has a short time to process everything that happened. Because here’s the thing, Poison is a fantasy, it’s a mask he puts in to forget the emotional and physical weight that was put on him, hence why it’s so flashy and pretty. The few glimpses of Angel being visibly distraught show that all the parts where he isn't are him disassociating.

See I can analyze stuff and I totally understand what they were trying to do with it but the difference with Fîls de Joie is, that we didn't know the life or personality of The Mother and we learn it through the song.

Angel Dust and Valentino’s relationship is highlighted throughout the shows and Poison doesn't add anything new to the table. The song is POINTLESS. Husk already looked at us and told us that Angel Dust being sexual was a whole persona he puts in.

You can say that the song humanized him since he was basically the “AaahaAH SEX” character but the locker scene already did and… I don’t like the story behind the making of it, why you ask?

Because Vivienne let Raphielle’s work affect her writing.

Visually speaking I believe you can present a disturbing concept with equally disturbing imagery, I understand that the point was to make you uncomfortable and the Dance sequence was Angel Dust disassociating while what was happening was displayed on the screen.

But… can someone explain why they let the work of someone blatantly fetishizing Angel and Valentino's relationship leak into the final product? I don’t even care that Raphielle or Vivienne have a nonconsensual fetish but we can all agree that his content depicting the two men will be inrentently for gooning purposes right? Or am I crazy for saying that?!

Okay, I wanna be clear, Raphielle can do everything he wants what I care about is that his fetishistic content was referenced in the shows.

→ Here’s one of his works. Go at 2:45 if you wanna skip the sexual stuff

→ Click here for more proof

The idea of Angels Dust being “sexy” while his image is projected on screens is from Raphielle II, his work is for sexual gratification but Medrano still referenced it despite Raph being pretty vocal about it.

And that’s not all.

Yes, Vivienne, it’s great marketing to make a cum joke about visuals displaying rape. Because in case y’all forgot all of the sex scenes in the clip are non-consensual from Angel Dust's perspective.

Am I supposed to believe that this woman cares when not only she has a double standard only showing rape and sexual assault as a whole in a bad way when it comes to her favorite character?

Am I supposed to believe that she cares when she associates herself with a fetishizer and references his work in her show?

Why did Stromae managed to make me care about an unnamed fictional dead woman in the spam of 3:57 when she just irked me in 20 minutes with her so-called “well done” representation of sex workers?

Is that really what people call a realistic presentation? How does someone manage to fumble so hard on every aspect of the series, I’m starting to believe that Hazbin Hotel is just rage-bait with the lack of respect she puts into it.

That’s all for me if anyone wants to add anything, the comments are there.

[emeryhiro]

I think Daryl and Carol having so much trauma in their pasts and also shared trauma since meeting each other at the quarry is what's kept them from being a romantic couple. Carol keeps trying fresh starts with new people (Tobin, Ezekiel, Oceanside) who don't know her as well as Daryl does. Meanwhile, Daryl admires strong women (Carol, Michonne, Rosita, Leah) and is more at ease with women in general. The first time he saw Connie she was saving a baby. Who wouldn't like and trust her instantly?

Hi Anon,

I agree with you 100%

I've broken down my thoughts into a few sections because it got a bit long and I just wanted to make this easier for me to write and for readers to follow.

Daryl and Carols Trauma

Yes, this is exactly what has kept them apart. They have both been used and abused by the people in their past who were supposed to protect and love them, and one of the outcomes of that is how they don't believe they deserve to be truly loved.

There's this quote I love from The Perks of Being a Wallflower that goes:

"We accept the love we think we deserve" - Stephen Chbosky

And also:

"When you are not fed love on a silver spoon you learn to lick it off knives" - Lauren Eden

I think both of these capture the psychology behind Carol and Daryl's behaviours in accepting their love for one another.

I believe they both love each other so deeply, but neither thinks they are worthy of the other, or could make the other happy, so they've keep their distance, expecting that there has to be someone better than them out there, someone who could make the other happier.

The love they've chosen

Carol chose Tobin and Ezekiel because they were good guys with whom she could have relationships that were completely under her control. She could only give/show as much of herself as she needed or felt comfortable to do so.

Daryl chose Leah because, well, (this might be controversial) because he thought that's what Carol wanted for him. He was out in that forest for years, at first looking for Rick, but after a while because, as he said, "it just got easier". I think what he meant by that but couldn't really say out loud was that it was easier than being back in the community with everyone, where he would have to watch Carol live a life with Ezekiel, just like the life he's always wanted to have with her, which was too difficult for him.

And when Carol tells him to basically "move on with his life", what she means is "let Rick go and come back to us", but what Daryl hears is "I've moved on with someone else; now you need to move on from me". And Leah happens to be the only female in his life with no connection to Carol or his community, that (as you said) he admired for her strength, and with whom he can hide away. Although I do think Leah was incredibly manipulative with her ultimatums, but Daryl doesn't understand that that kind of treatment isn't okay, because he believes that that's the treatment he deserves.

Meeting Connie

Yes, exactly. He sees Connie as this pure and good creature, and he immediately feels that he has to protect her because people like her help balance out the bad in the world. This type of protectiveness comes from instinct, not romantic feelings or attraction. It's the same reason he felt a draw and obligation to protect Beth and Denise, and then felt so much guilt when he failed to do so. He also probably saw Connie as his chance to redeem himself from the past situations where he failed to protect the people he felt he should have.

What sets Carol apart

Carol, on the other hand, is his equal, his other half. She's just as flawed as him. She can take care of herself just as well as he can. She saves him just as much as he saves her. They know each other better than they know themselves. They love each other unconditionally through both the good things and the ugly things. And at the end of the day, they only really need and search for each other.

I've talked in depth about what Carol means to Daryl in previous posts [here] & [here], so I'll keep this short and won't go into those details again.

Going forward into the future/spinoff

Again, I've spoken about this in previous posts, but I just want to go over it again briefly. I think the spinoff has set up the perfect situation for them to open up to one another without the distraction of all their responsibilities towards others, especially once they start to deal with their past traumas like we already saw Carol doing in episode one and we saw them both doing in the leaked script of the season 2 finale, as they're leaving France.

~~~~~

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me! Both Carol and Daryl are such complicated characters with so much depth and it's really nice to talk through these things sometimes ♡♡♡

If you have any other thoughts you'd like to share or disscuss with me please don't hesitate to let me know ♡

[martinfox141]

Oh, I almost forgot! All will be based on the Daynap ship. Possibly there will be others in any story but it is open to your readers' wishes. Thank you in advance for every vote and participation, I look forward to your answers!^^

The stories will be on Ao3 for better access. Last reminder :3

❤️🧡💜

[poreyneel]

i was thinking about ur Durge x Gortash x Gale art, and its dynamic implications, and i thought of a slightly different version i thought youd like to hear,

Gortash x Gale x Tav

Hear me out, SPOILERS OF COURSE

Gale is torn between being Gale Dekarois, the man who loves his cat and learning, and being Gale of Waterdeep, the powerful wizard who was proud and strong enough to draw the goddess of magic herself, and who better to represent those desires then Enver & Tav?

Devilish Enver who hungers for control and power, whispering promises in his ear, of ruling together, of all his dark desires fufilled, of controlling the crown, because who needs the absolute when they themselves ascend to godhood?

Darling Tav who is sweet and charming, risking everything to save everyone, who accepted every piece of him, who would stand in defiance, who'd refused to compromise with evil and come out on top every time, who has given him hope and unconditional love.

i totally ranted for much longer then i meant lol but i am just very passionate

OMG THAT'S INTERESTING and I thought about them too!! thank you!! before I go to Tav x Gale x Gortash let's talk why I started all of this with Gale x Gortash (but it's with avatar Gale most likely bc there he can do literally what he wants bc we're controlling him lmao) so, it's literally a dynamic between two chosen - Bane already desired Mystra's power so in Gale's "I wanna reforge the Crown and ascend" corruption arc an alliance with Gortash can be useful to take her down their relationship is not about love, it's about partnership and world domination (because if players don't try to convince Gale to throw his ambition his root is an attempt to become a new god) and yes, the plot leads to a different outcome, but i love making different scenarios so it's like a trade offer - Gortash gets the opportunity to implement his plan, and Gale gets a strong ally to try to take revenge on Mystra and get rid of the sphere it's more about partners in crime again than feelings ig but we all know that in the canon this ambition does not end with anything good for one or the other but their duet would be truly catastrophic, provided that Gortash knows perfectly well what to put pressure on and what to say so, back to the Gortash x Gale x Tav: Gale is very easy to manipulate - Mystra has been doing this for a long time, we can do the same and Gortash, a specialist in manipulation, especially. Gale becomes attached very quickly, he doesn't like himself so much that he is ready for literally anything for the sake of those who give him attention. Gortash can take an advantage of it. My Tav - bard named Nayris Sterr - the absolute opposite of both Gale and Gortash. He doesn't need power even in theory of ascending and blah blah blah, he just wants to tell a story - and fate decides what it will be. For Gale, Nayris is a guiding light, he never judges him, but sees when something goes wrong. He knows people too well, especially their psychology and behavior - and he will not press if he sees traces of some kind of trauma. And even despite Gale's good intentions, he knows that the option of using the crown will not lead to good outcome. History should not repeat itself (yeah Karsus hello!!). And this is the first person to accept him for who he really is, not who he tries to become. Their relationship is about mutual help and understanding, even though Nayris is not a wizard and not Mystra's chosen one, he is still the same person who just wants to help Gale remember that he's a human being at the first place and he matters. He really matters - and not only to him. Gale has gone through a lot of pain, especially the trauma of the abandoned. The fact that he always wants to prove something - but he does not need to prove it and Nayris will let him know.

But what if he just won't listen? Or if the bard says something wrong and Gale realizes that their connection is not so strong as he thought. After meeting with Gortash and information about the crown - Nayris is categorically against it - he could certainly go his own way. In the canon, he is quite loyal due to affection and feelings, but what if the realization came to him that he is free to do whatever he wants? Their bond would be about obsession, trust and disastrous consequences. Gale is dependent on Mystra, in love with Tav (Nayris) but sees potential and ambition in Gortash. whether the desire to take revenge on Mystra and become a deity or the awareness of attachment to a single person will prevail - who knows

[loveskilljoy]

Ok so like. Heimdall. Love him, hate him, whatever—I feel as though a Rather Large Point of his character is often overlooked, and its actually one of the most important parts ! So, I wanted to make a (mildly longwinded) post about both his personality and how its a stellar example of Odin and the abuse he’s so frequently described as having put his “family” through. TW’s for discussions of emotional and psychological abuse from a parental figure, the cycle of abuse, and a very brief mention of alcoholism 

First and foremost, this post is NOT to excuse some of the genuinely shitty things Heimdall is responsible for both in the present setting of the game and things mentioned in the past (by Mimir, mostly). There is certainly plenty that he has done wrong. What this post is about is one of the most frequently misunderstood aspects of him; which is that while yeah, he’s definitely an asshole—especially for having spoken to Literal Kids like that I mean cmon Atreus is like 13—but there is ABSOLUTELY a reason for that! Does that excuse it? Not at all ! But it does give an immense amount of insight into both Heimdall and Odin as characters. Primarily, it’s an excellent example of how Odin just Loves to nurture codependency, and that his way of going about that often involves whittling a person down to whichever traits he thinks will make it most convenient for him to bend to his will/manipulate. This is obviously seen with Thor pretty explicitly in game, Odin commenting that he’s really only good for fighting and drinking, but I 100% believe the same has and continues to happen with Heimdall. His outwardly haughty, somewhat conceited/holier-than-thou attitude that boils down to everyone else being beneath him in some way are simply the traits that Odin has made him out to be—over lifetimes. He is special because he has Gjallarhorn, he is better and smarter because he was gifted foresight, and the job of protecting his home from threats. He is Odin’s most trusted and loyal confidant, and for a guy who likely wants admiration and pride from the All-Father more so than anyone else in Asgard, that’s reason enough to be completely at his will. It’s why he’s so absurdly faithful to Odin. Because really, what is Heimdall without any of those things? He can’t fight for the life of him, he’s not nearly built for that. He’s still obviously pretty young (even in god terms) so it’s not as though he’s fit for being a general or war counsel. So, strip away the foresight and illusion of an elevated position, and you get a kid who just... desperately wants to prove himself to his dad. A kid who gets shoved away at the top of a wall on his own for eons. Which, might I mention, Heimdall basically says upon meeting Atreus. LIKE THE PROJECTION IS LOUD

With all that said, in my very sporadic and probably a little incomprehensible way, it really isn’t a surprise that he acts the way he does—because he’s reacting to trauma. Of course he’s going to lean completely into the egotistical act, because that’s all that he is. And, most importantly, when he’s in a position in which that identity is questioned, he like. IMMEDIATELY crumbles and retreats in on himself in a way that’s goddamn blatant in one of the very first cutscenes with him: after his fight with Atreus. Unfortunately Tumblr adamantly refuses to let me post this damn scene as a video so we’re just gonna have to make do with pictures BUT. But... the fact that he sobers up so quickly in Odin’s presence, his determination in convincing him that Atreus is of ill intent (because. yk. thats Heimdall’s JOB) and the way his expression drops as soon as Odin shows even a Hint of being disappointed in him. LIKE. LOOK AT THIS. 

I know I definitely read his expression as confusion the first time I watched this scene, but upon multiple rewatches it’s pretty fucking clear that isn’t what this is. Heimdall isn’t confused at Odin’s reactions, he’s scared. Of Odin. Genuinely I implore you to go give this scene another watch because the way he whispers the “But... All-Father...” line sounds like he’s damn near about to cry.  WITH ALL OF THAT SAID ! Heimdall is shown rather brilliantly in his introduction on the sheer basis that we, as the player, are supposed to read him as a jerk with a stick-up-his-ass, only to then see that demeanor falter entirely in the presence of his father. He is a living, breathing example (as much as Thor is) of the effects Odin’s manipulation and abuse have on all that he’s supposedly close with and I think it’s a facet that tends to get forgotten amidst a large portion of the fandom piling on hate for Heimdall. Which is to say, if you hate him, that’s absolutely fine! he’s uh. Not designed to be a likeable guy. What Heimdall is designed to be is a representation of trauma and unhealthy coping mechanisms, of which his character shows splendidly in multiple instances even outside of the stuff I’ve shown here. In the hopes of not letting this post get any more egregious in its length than it already is, these are the main things I’m going to cover. but just. Yeah, got tired of seeing takes saying he’s a one dimensional character when he’s obviously got a lot to him !!!!

[gimmemore14]

Ahhhhhhh!!!! I came here because I just finished Chapter 15 of your Bad Guys win A/B/O fic (I can’t remember the exact title and have the tab closed 😭) and let me tell you I am OBSESSED with your writing, holy chips. It’s such an indulgent fic for me with the angst and more angst and aghhhhhhhhh it’s so good!!! And I have so many questions, so many little thought hyper fixations from it! Like, Wally being alive- AGCHCIDJNDND!! How would Slade even react to that, to Wally and Dick potentially being reunited? And Tim!!! My poor baby!! I’m literally frothing at the mouth every time I remember how isolated he is in regards to everyone else. Because Jason’s finally with the others now, and Dick has Damian (and had Rose and Joey as well technically) but Tim is just… GOD THE ANGST. AUTHOR YOU GENIUS. He’s all alone in these isolated mountains with Ra’s and going through non-consensual body modifications and AFSHDHJJNN (Tim is one of my favorite characters). Although I guess he technically does have SOME support, slightly, with Layla and Ali and Amzi… It’s not the same as full on family yk? And then DICK. DICK’S ARC. GOD. He’s isolated, and coerced, and manipulated- he’s given this false sense of home, of pack, he’s trauma bonded with his abuser, he’s genuinely emotionally entangled with Slade, he’s initially terrified of Slade’s softness because he KNOWS the psychological consequences of softness from a abuser and captor, he KNOWS it’ll make everything ten times more confusing and he’ll get conflicted about his emotions and bonds, AND IT HAPPENS AND NOW HES MATED!! And the engagement dinner! What’s going to happen to Tim? God, what’s going to happen when KON sees him? I genuinely wonder what Tim’s sort of breaking point is going to be, for this fic, however. What I mean by this is Jason and Dick both had this sort of arc where they were reached this submissive, defeated state. For Dick this happened in much smaller increments, him breaking down along the way and then the final sort of end all be all being the bite, and with Jason it was suddenly forced into him, with Sionis’ forced mating and Jason’s subsequent submission. Even if Jason wasn’t fully broken, he was still submitted to Sionis. But with Tim, he’s still got all this fire and snark. He’s ready to do whatever it takes to make this hard for Ra’s, with the way he keeps egging him on. I’m DYING because I have a feeling the forced mating bite from Ra’s is going to be HIS breaking point into submisson, and OH MY CHIPS AM I NERVOUS FOR THAT. I just KNOW he’s going to be the prettiest bride ever though, I say this in the least sadistic way possible I promise you I am not trying to glorify or romanticize rape and non-consensual body modifications resulting in a loss of control over masculinity, but like. Tim is canonically the Twink ok. He’s going to be so pretty and so tragic and I just. I’m just here for that ok?

So that’s pretty much the end of my hyper fixation rant… god I’m so sorry if you had to read all this but just know I absolutely EAT UP your writing, it makes my day, and I CANNOT wait for if you ever update it again (I’ll def try to leave another comment like this for a new chapter if you don’t mind)

THANK YOU FOR FEEDING US WITH YOUR DELICIOUS WORK IM VERY GRATEFUL 🙏

SO GLAD YOURE LIKING IT!!!

Idk how to write stories without angst 😭😂

Slade was definitely a little jealous of Wally at first (I mean the man caught him masturbating thinking about Wally 😬😏) but now well… you’ll find that Slade is feeling pretty secure with them having matching mating bites gahah he’d definitely be a cocky prick about it now

Poor Tim definitely has the worst of it now! His isolation breeds desperation and honestly a bit of a moral disconnect as a form of self protection. Every bird thought they were alone, but Tim knows he is… hopefully that’ll change soon hahaha

That’s 100% why Dick fought so hard!! Even with the arrival of Joey and rose he was grateful but also pissed because he knew Slade would use them against him too, he called him out for it, knew the man’s plan but unfortunately Dick can’t just… NOT care about people either. If Slade kept being an aggressive asshole the whole time things would be different; however, he’s a smart man and dick is definitely emotionally entangled now (but so is Slade 😂)

Tim is feeling a false sense of security with Ra’s traditional values so despite what’s happening to his body, he feels like he still has time (he doesn’t) but seeing the supers at the engagement dinner may change the urgency factor and make things more real for him…

You KNOW Ra’s is putting him in a multimillion dollar outfit, but he’d be the prettiest omega bride even in a potato sack hahah

Thank you for reading, don’t apologize, I LOVE comments/asks like this!! Blood in the Water has been my favorite thing to write so far!

Update will come eventually but I’m heading to Italy for my sisters wedding/vacation so my brain has been focusing on that, hopefully by the end of the month I’ll be able to crank the rest out and edit it 💜

[brokensoulmates2000]

Remember those weird scenes in Adolescence of Utena between Touga and Shiori? Well, they are not as weird as they seem

TW: Mentions of sexual abuse to a minor and homophobia

Alright fellas, it's been some tough weeks for me so I’ve been rewatching the last chapters of RGU as well as the movie cause, what else is better to watch than two women harboring hope in the midst of despair and starting a revolution? Also, they are super gay so sign me up.

There's so much I want to say about Adolescence of Utena because that movie is so unapologetically wild. I love it. Also after several rewatches in the span of six months, I think I know what is going on. The scenes (I hope) I grasped are those between Touga and Shiori.

From my perspective, Adolescence of Utena is about overcoming trauma, psychological patriarchy and imposed heterosexuality. Anthy is the one "running Ohtori". There is a whole conversation to be had on whether or not movie Ohtori is the same as anime Ohtori. Also, we would need another conversation to debate whether or not the rest of the characters except Utena and Anthy are actually themselves or if they are interpretations of their characters made by Utena and Anthy.

At the end, what matters is that Akio is dead and Anthy has killed him. Yet she is still the Rose Bride. Why? Because the effects of trauma and patriarchy are that insiduous. A revolution is not achieved until everyone unlearns everything the old regime taught. And what Akio taught the student council continues to affect them. From Anthy who keeps Ohtori up and running and sees herself as nothing more than an object to Saionji, who is back at clutching to his regressive views of masculinity. Without Akio around and no antagonist, we have to find those two characters who represent what the movie stands against: psychological patriarchy, imposed heterosexuality and trauma. The prince and witch archetypes embody this perfectly. Touga and Shiori too.

The symbols present in their scenes show this intent. First, let's talk about the sheets. Seems something only the movie used but-

The anime used it too.

By the way, the subtitles say: "I don’t have a roommate so I would like you to come back."

This is a good place to mention the castle represents heterosexuality. Akio said this in chapter 38:

Yes, Anthy is running away from heteronormativity at the end of the movie. Could she be more iconic?

Let's go back to the movie. To be more precise, the call between Touga and Akio. Akio starts by saying he doesn't know why his sister kidnapped the Rose Prince. Then he proceeds to reveal something very important: the prince never existed, he was The Lord of The Flies all along and Anthy put a spell on him to make him look as a prince.

The Lord of the Flies is another name for the devil, which is basically another code name for Akio, “the morning star”, Lucifer. In other words Akio always existed and he was never ‘transformed’ into that. I’m not saying Akio never had traits he shared with Utena, but that ugly part of himself, that evil in humanity associated with The Lord of The Flies, was always part of him. However, instead of accepting it and working through it (like Utena does when she accepts she only saved Anthy because of her ego), he preferred to indulge in his worst parts.

If Anthy’s magic was what made him appear as a prince… I’m not sure how that makes me feel. It can lead some people to believe Anthy deceived everyone willingly all along, but there are many factors that could motivate her decision. First, did she notice the world needed a prince and sent her brother knowing the world would never allow her to be a prince? Let’s also consider she is the youngest out of the two so her decision can be a result of needing protection, and "making" her brother become the prince she needed. That is of course, if Akio is not lying.

I only believe half of the things Akio says. He has a tendency to deflect questions, project his guilt onto others, manipulate and lie. In that same vein, Akio says Anthy's powers stopped working, therefore revealing the true nature of the prince. Then he goes on to say they created Ohtori to make Anthy’s magic come back which is not true. Because Anthy's magic is working just fine. And his powers too.

By that point, we should see Akio’s prone to lying to others and himself. That is why I believe he was always one with Dios. Akio, his bad side and Dios, his good side, inhabited his body. However his bad side was revealed to the world and he blames his sister for it even though she was the one who defended him and prevented his premature death at the hands of the mob. The world was disappointed he wasn’t perfect. He blames his sister for the discovery and the world demanding that perfectionism from him in the first place.

In the anime Akio says he wants back the power from his prince days, but he is still as powerful as he was in the past.

He takes Utena’s sword out of her chest.

And he teleports Anthy to the stairs leading to the castle.

There’s obviously some degree of magic he wields. On top of that, when Utena opens the Rose Gate, he orders her not to open it.

My first assumption is that he wanted to be the one to do open the gate, but shouldn’t he have said something like “Utena, you don’t understand how dangerous that is! Let me do it”? Instead his first instinct is to scream her not to open it. Why? Because he doesn’t want the power beyond the gate. In reality, he is scared of it. Deep down he wants the gate to remain close for all eternity because that keeps Ohtori operating. I don’t know if he takes any excuse that blinds him from the bitter truth consciously or not, but he does it: the power of revolution is for him to have his powers back, the power of revolution is for his sister to have her magic back. He created a system in which he never has to grow, a functioning coffin in which he is the master of everything. The only thing in his mind is to keep it running.

Now that is out of the way, let’s move on to another scene.

When Touga starts talking about this trauma, at some point a machine starts pulling the sheets, making them move. This serves as a visual representation of Ohtori, our trauma-fueled machine, waking up from its long sleep. That sex scene between Touga and Shiori is a form of trauma bonding. Trauma intertwining if you will. Touga is engaging in the same pattern of behavior he used to engage in with Akio (having sex with someone he “schemes with”). Still in bed, he shares with Shiori a hurtful truth: his dad sold him to his adoptive father who sexually abused him as a child. In the scene that shows the act, Touga is lying down in a field of lettuces.

Just like Adonis was in his death.

And that represents the death of a side of Touga. A death that hindered his relationship with his sister and caused him to resent her so much. A death that ruined his relationship with his best friend who sensed Touga’s emotional distance and confused it with superiority.

I’m aware some people interpret lettuce fields as male sexual impotence, but that is clearly not the case with Touga. In fact he copes with his sexual trauma with hyper-sexuality, but just like impotence, they are both a malfunction of sexuality.

Moving on, the camera turns towards a lettuce and we view Shiori.

There are sheets coming out of her back which shows how much compulsive heterosexuality and homophobia she has assimilated, and how she views them as the answer that will make her misery disappear. If she clutches to those ideas, she can be “free” like a butterfly. Also, we can interpret that scene as her response to Touga’s trauma. “Yes, my homophobia was right because one man did something terrible to a boy.” You know, classic talking points for homophobes.

This trauma intertwining and Shiori inserting herself in Touga’s flashbacks mark the birth of, you guessed it, more trauma. This is the product that such system as Ohtori creates: misery and emotional guardedness, dissatisfaction and delusion. Things Akio clutches onto and wants everyone to clutch too.

Too bad car sapphics are so hard to beat.

[pacificwaternymph]

Question about the kid pirate AU, so we know that Joey decided to stay, how does he react to everyone on the island now that he's there?

I'd he defensive, does he try to hurt anyone, does he accidentally hurt anyone, does he have plans to find out 'what they did' to Xornoth(love and affection), or anything if the sorts?

Also, what do Shrub and Katherine think about the new traumatized teen they have now, like are they just like "ah shit, here we go again"

He's in a constant state of wariness and suspicion. The only person he trusts is Xornoth, and even that has... limitations. He can't bring up whatever manipulation the pirate queen and wolf spirit put him through without the other vehemently denying it.

But he also has to start trying to "undo" whatever they did, and he starts small, like suggesting that everyone back home misses him, and drawing on memories of their childhood.

But even that Xornoth brushes off, saying no one actually misses them, and while those memories are fond, they will always be in the shadow of every bruise and cut his parents ever inflicted on them. They're tainted, in a way.

He sticks close to Xornoth, basically acting as his shadow. He's super protective of them, which Xornoth thinks is sweet but also he really doesn't need to worry, they're just going out to the garden literally nothing every happens in the garden-

The thing about Joey's trauma is that it takes on a more... subtle form. His parents were verbally and psychologically abusive, but they never laid a hand on him, which adds an extra layer of "I'm not abused, I was never hurt" when in fact he was very abused and the damage runs deep.

He tries his hardest to avoid Xornoth's moms at all costs. Whenever he is near them, he's very stiff and formal. In his mind, no matter how much he hates them, they hold all the power in this situation. Which means he can't give them even the slightest reason to be angry with him. He falls back onto old habits without even realizing it, since this is exactly what he did in his own home.

And of course Shrub and Katherine take one look at him and silently resolve to burn his parents' estate to the ground. Yeah, no way they're letting this child leave now without proper therapy. They know he doesn't trust them yet and give him space, and they're glad he at least has Xornoth.

Of course, Joey catches onto this, and panics hard about it. He would react the same way if they interacted with him regularly, or did just about anything in his vicinity, because. Ya know.

They're nothing but polite and even kind when he interacts with them but it's an act, it has to be an act, they're planning something, they're going to get rid of him so he doesn't undo all of their hard work on Xornoth, he just knows it-

It's a rough few first weeks.

[itsthenovelteafactor]

Fall of the House of Hargreeves

So I mentioned a while back in my Superhero Gothic meta that there were a number of parallels between the season one finale of The Umbrella Academy and the Edgar Allen Poe short story The Fall of the House of Usher and that I could probably write a whole meta on that if anyone was interested. Shout out and love to the anon who requested that I do that! 

It’s been a minute since I’ve done one of these long form metas, but I am very excited to get back to writing about two of my favorite things: gothic literature and chaotic superheroes. 

Part I: The Fall of the House of Usher

The Fall of the House of Usher (which I’ll call House of Usher for convenience for the rest of this meta) is a short story by Edgar Allen Poe first published in 1939. It is considered a classic gothic short story, and deals with themes of family, madness, inheritance, and isolation. 

Since it’s in the public domain, I’ll go ahead and link a pdf to the story here. If you aren’t interested in reading, though, or just want a refresher, the story follows an unnamed narrator going to visit his ill friend, a man named Roderick Usher in his isolated (and very spooky) family estate. Upon arrival, he discovers that Roderick’s sister, Madeline Usher, is also ill, and has a tendency to fall into dreamlike trances.

Over the course of the visit, Roderick confesses to the narrator that not only does he believe the house is alive, but that it is connected to the fate of the family which, at this point, only includes Roderick and Madeline. He later comes and tells the narrator that Madeline has died, and enlists his help in order to bury her in the family tomb beneath the house. They do so, but for the next couple of days Roderick is suspiciously...on edge. 

Then, one dark and stormy night, Roderick shows up in the narrator’s room incredibly worked up, and throws open the window, and starts low-key (read: high-key) having a breakdown. The narrator is unsure as to why until he hears ripping and tearing sounds coming from somewhere in the house. These ripping and tearing sounds are revealed to be Madeline whom Roderick and the narrator buried alive whose appearance scares Roderick to death, right before she collapses, also dead from the strain of tearing through the foundations of the house.

The narrator decides this would probably be a good time to leave and is very much right about that because as soon as he leaves, the house (which was already in pretty bad shape) splits in two and collapses into the lake surrounding it. The end.

Part II: Umbrella Academy as Gothic

So, there are probably a couple similarities between House of Usher and The Umbrella Academy season one that stand out right off the bat, but I’d like to start by taking a step back to talk about thematic parallels between the two works. If you’d like to read a very long winded explanation of why I consider The Umbrella Academy to be a modern gothic tale, I have a really long meta about it. 

If not, here’s a quick overview:

Gothic does not have a clearly defined set of requirements as a genre, but its purpose is to explore the contradictions and the failing edifices of convention in a way that is dramatic and often fantastic. 

Gothic fiction plays with reality, but usually in a way that is representative of the characters and story. 

It often situates itself during times of great change, as there is something haunting about the irreversible passage of time, particularly for those that struggle to acknowledge it and hide behind conventions that have grown increasingly irrelevant. 

Poe is considered one of the classic authors of gothic fiction (though the genre significantly predates him), and is decidedly one of the best well-known examples of it. 

The Umbrella Academy is a family drama about former child superheroes dealing with their trauma while trying to prevent an apocalypse that their every move seems to set further in motion. It explores the messy and complicated relationships between siblings who have been abused and pit against each other for years. And yeah, it’s fun with great music and talking gorillas and dance sequences, but the premise is kind of hard for me to read as anything other than gothic.

Part III: Parallels

Like House of Usher, the first season of Umbrella Academy takes place in a massive, largely empty mansion where siblings gather with disastrous consequences. Both works explore a family that is past their prime and disconnected from the present. They also both explore the psychological toll of isolation, the consequences of tyrannical family rules, and why it is a really bad idea to lock your unstable sister in a basement and just leave her there. 

Let’s start with some thematics parallels. Everyone in House of Usher is extremely isolated, and the absence of anything resembling the modern world amongst the house full of relics is part of the horror. All of the siblings in Umbrella Academy are defined by their isolation as well, physically (Luther, Five, and Ben), socially (Vanya, Diego, Klaus, and Allison), and emotionally (legit all of them). It is this isolation that drives the conflict of the story, feeding into every characters’ choices. 

In both House of Usher and Umbrella Academy, the main characters are trapped in this isolated state as a direct result of their familial legacy. In House of Usher, the titular house is a character itself, a manifestations of the obligations Madeline and Roderick hold as members of an aristocratic family that is so far divorced from wealth and status that it keeps them from ever fully moving on and rejoining the real world. In Umbrella Academy, the characters are similarly trapped by their familial legacy, this time in the form of the specter of their abusive father, and the roles he created for them. Like the Usher siblings, the Hargreeves have no way of maintaining the roles their family left out for them – they were never given the tools to function in the real world and it cripples them – but are trapped in them regardless. 

Part IV: The Woman* in White 

*As of the time I am writing this, nothing has been said regarding Vanya’s gender identity being written to match Elliot Page’s. I am using she/her pronouns for Vanya, as that is what has been used for the character thus far. 

Aside from thematic parallels, however, the most direct connection between the short story and series, and in fact the reason I was inspired to write this meta in the first place is the way both of the stories end: with a sister trapped beneath the house clawing her way out to face her brother(s and sister) and creating a disruption of the family legacy so great that the entire estate crumbles.

Madeline Usher is described at this point as wearing a white dress, strained with the injuries she sustained from physically breaking herself out of the basement tomb her brother buried her alive in. Vanya, of course, becomes at this moment the White Violin, and though she has not yet had the epic violin-music-so-powerful-it-changes-the-color-of-her-clothes scene, the principal still stands.

As characters, there are also a couple of noteworthy parallels between Vanya and Madeline. The narrator at one point describes “the illness of the lady Madeline had lone been beyond the help of her doctors. She seemed to care about nothing” (Poe, 27). The reader never knows what illness precisely is the cause of Madeline’s apparent madness, but we see the effects. It dulls her emotional responses to situations and leaves her withdrawn and powerless. Similarly, we learn over the course of the first season of The Umbrella Academy that the medication Reginald Hargreeves prescribed Vanya for her anxiety is actually a power suppressor for her abilities that has much the same effect – because they are strengthened by extreme emotion, the drugs numb Vanya’s emotional responses and deprive her of the ability to access her powers.

Additionally, the final scene of the story story shows Madeline escaping her tomb during a great storm and going to face her brother who put her there, the storm itself being a metaphor for her anguish that tears the house apart. Vanya’s connection to the destruction of the house is a bit more literal, but it is similarly a manifestation of her anguish and trauma. She sees flashbacks of her siblings being distant and rude to her in their childhoods and the anger she feels rips the foundation apart. 

It is not entirely clear in the short story why Roderick buries Madeline alive – there are a lot of theories: he genuinely believed she was dead, he wanted her out of the picture, he himself was succumbing to the madness of the house, etc – but the guilt he feels for doing so manifests as him hearing her scraping her way out for several days preceding her escape. The justification for Vanya’s imprisonment is more clear in text, but the series of flashbacks make it clear that it is not just the imprisonment that has driven her over the edge. It it guilt for her sister, anger at her abusive upbringing that is much more easily directed at her siblings than her father, the newfound emotions experienced by being off her medication for the first time since childhood, Leonard’s manipulations, etc. 

In both cases, amidst a spiral of emotions and experiences folding in on themselves, Vanya and Madeline experience a single, cold moment of clarity that drives them to escape, and it is that moment of clarity that breaks the shadow of the family legacy. They observe the situation as it stands and realize that it is completely unacceptable, and it is the realization that leads everything to crumble. Because gothic literature is focused on the complexities of maintaining that which is out of date, the realization that things must change can break the spell.

Part V: Conclusions 

As per usual, I have no great theories on why this is or what it means. One of the reasons I love gothic literature is that it is rife with meaning that can be more easily felt than deciphered. I welcome any and all interpretations, theories, (politely worded) disagreements, and comments. 

Thanks for taking the time to read; I have a lot of fun doing these. Enjoy spooky season, y’all. 💛

[low-budget-korra]

Lets talk about Korra (again)

i already made this analysis, and it was well received but i dont know, i wanna do it again. Why not right? My english is better now than was when i made that analysis so i think  this one will be better written

What a way to introduce a protagonist. This line and this scene tell us everything we need to know about Korra at that time and everything she knew about herself.

In book one Korra is a 17′s old teenager who have no idea how the world, how life is outside the training center she grew up in and had been locked up since ever. So she is not only naive but have lack of social skills

Oh, and not everyone who lack’s social skills will act like Zuko and Azula okay? Korra can be confident, expressive and outgoing and still have problems when it comes to social skills.One thing dont exclude the other.

“I’m the Avatar and you gotta deal with it” did you guys notice that only for that line we can see the entire opposite on how she treat her role as avatar in comparisson with Aang? And im not here to judge because is two very different contexts.

As far as we know, Korra grew up without friends or romantic partners. Of course, she had her training partners but i believe that they are just that. 

So her entarely perception of herself was around her duty as Avatar, she didnt have personal life, she barely was Korra...She was The avatar and thats that.

So she came to Republic City, it was a mess. 

Its funny to see that she have no touch when it comes to simply talk to people, i guess when you grew up away from society, this happens. And yes, she is cocky and had to learn that people arent there to somewhat please her, and she learned that quicky. 

Thats why the Pro Bending was important for her character, not only for training but also as means of socilization.

Now lets talk about the villains: Amon and Tarrlok

The two of them represents two differents threats to Korra. Amon represents a threat to her duty as Avatar while Tarrlok represents a threat to Korra as a person.

In episode 4 we have what i still thinks is the darker episode from TLOK. In this episode Amon ambushes Korra in the final moments... Even knowing that they did their best to make Amon’s power and control be non-sexualized as possible still...He have her down on her knews, totally helpless and he even invades Korra’s personal space by touching in her face forcing her to look at him. He didn't have to sexually touch her to violate her.

And right after, the fear in Tenzin voice when asking what happened after seeing her laying in the ground like that, and how Korra is sobing in his arms teeling him how powerless and helpless she felt. I mean...Oh, and she keeps terryfied by him until he takes her bending.

Tarrlok in the  other hand doesnt do much different from his brother and started to harass Korra because he cant take ‘no’ as a answer when Korra didnt wanted to join his task force.

Whats interesting is that if it wasnt for Tarrlok harassement and maniputation, Korra wouldnt have joined his task force and wouldnt have confronted Amon and wouldn't have gone through that terrible encounter.

The thing is that Korra is caught right in the middle of a politcal power dispute over the city, something that she for sure wasnt prepare for it. And both Amon and Tarrlok woud hurt or kill her without think twice about it if that means gain  power. And that was exacly what happened

Tarrlok tried to manipulate her and keep her on leash where he could, and when his tatics didnt worked anymore he alreay had a plan B. Yes that whole metal box in that cabin in the middle of nowhere was made especifically for her and maybe Tenzin if he also get in his way.

In the end Korra lost the physical battle against both but won the ethical battle also against both. She was the responsable for expose both of them as corrupted and hypocrites. But at what price? Amon was able to remove the bends of the Avatar. And without them, how could she be the Avatar?

Remember that her entirely conception of herself was built around her duty as Avatar, be the avatar. After all, everything she was, everything she'd trained so hard for, had been destroyed in minutes. Thats why i still strongly believe that she was thinking about killing herself at the end, nobodys goes all sad and crying to in front of a clifft without thinking about jumping from it. 

But she, i think given up the idea and just sit and started to crying when Aang appeared and help her, giving her bendings back in one of the best scenes of the show. So after have everything solve and still managed to get the boy she was in love with, things where great and she “move on”

In that first half, Korra is unbearable. Everything she learned in Book 1 how to be more mature, less spoiled and all, was thrown in the trash and she was the same "child" of the book one only worse.

Until I stopped and realized that I was also unbearable and childish like this when I had my bad phases of anxiety and depression, as defense mechanism and keep people away. Returning to Korra, and if this way of acting of her was nothing more than this defense mechanism?

Because guess what, i dont think she “move on” from all that happened in Book One that fast, and for add more drama she discovered that was her father idea of keeping her locked up training in that training center we saw in book one and not traveling like avatars before her. No wonder she felt betrayed. And for adding even more drama, people still keep treating her like child, so she was despered for some validation. Something that she found in her uncles arms but she was betrayed by him after.

In the end, Korra again goes through a traumatic experience when she has her connection with past lives destroyed. We see how it affected her when she apologizes to Tenzin, through tears. And Tenzin, as the excellent master he is, tries to motivate her to face Vaatu again (now merged with Unalaq, her uncle) and again she saves the day even after go throught a traumatic event

In the final moments, we see the innocent decision to reconnect the world of spirits and the world of men. And we also see Korra and Mako permanently end their turbulent relationship.

Book 3 begins in a more mature, we see all the characters being presented in a more mature way and it seems that Korra now has overcome everything that has passed. We have the relationship between Korra and Asami deepening as well

In Book 3, called "Change" we have a great sacrifice from Korra. Her life goes down a notch when she decides to save the new airbenders from Zaheer and the Red Lotus, the only villain until now that really threat her life since their sole goal was to kill the avatar.

Korra won again but this time victory costed way too much. Yes she save the day again but now she was  physically and psychologically defeated. It was too much, she broke.

Book 4 begins and we only saw Korra in the final minutes and she is unrecognizable. We see that, once proud and courageous avatar, in someone depressed and cowerd. We never have saw Korra like that, even when she was afraid of Amon she wasnt like that.

Korra is afraid of being the Avatar again and her fight against PTSD is still one of the most sensitive, responsable and honest representation of Mentall Issues that i saw, and it was before this subject gain more space on media. It was before people started to give attention to this

I also think that she was having flashs from her other fights and not only the one against Zaheer.

Another thing I think is worth mention is that Korra took 3 years to feel safer and re-embrace her duties as Avatar. It was not 3 weeks or 3 months, it was 3 years. And anyone who suffers from some mental illness knows very well the stigma that is, the fight that is, because everyone wants you to be well faster as possible  when the truth is that many times you spend years fighting against this.  And this is a pressure that falls on you.Imagine, seeing all your friends moving forward while you continue "stock in the same place"?

Only after Korra confronts Zaheer, I think that was a way to show her coping with the trauma, she improves to the point of returning to be the great Avatar we know. I personally still struggles with this scene because put the victim in front of her agressor may not be the best idea but i understand that she needed to see that he was just a man and not the invencible monster her mind was telling her

One of the lines that stuck with me the most was in the TLOK version of the ember island players, the one that made a recap of the show before the finale. When Korra said “I was so naive” just before we watch her narration of her journey, we can feel pain, sadness and strenght. Janet was amazing in the way the delivered this line.

And this fucking quote i saw here on tumblr still is the goat: “The Last Airbender is a story of a boy who becomes a god. The Legend of Korra is the story of a goddess who becomes a girl "

And I still get really pissed when someone comes to talk shit about  Korra because she is such an incredible heroine and her journey is also so incredible.

The story of how life can be hard and unfair, how it can hurt and paralyze, but there is always a reason to move on. We should always move on.

Korra is definitely not weak, quite the opposite, she is one of the if not the strongest heroine I have ever seen. Korra inspires overcoming 

[onebillionstarsff]

if you think c!dream deserves torture, you don’t know what torture is

alrighty, it’s time for me to do annoyingly in-depth lore analysis again because i have seen way too many people on my dash and twitter timeline saying that c!dream deserves to be tortured.

i don’t really think people have a comprehensive, reality-based understanding of what torture actually is, what it can do, and the motivations behind it. i, unfortunately, do: i’ve done extensive professional-level study on torture, so i’m going to do my best to put out some knowledge into our little dsmp-related world.

obvious content warnings for references to torture and to violence below the cut (nothing too graphic, though; i know this isn’t an academic forum or government work)

all of this is /rp /dsmp

i’ll also list some sources at the very bottom if you want to learn more

alright then, let’s start: what is torture, anyway?

there are two types of definitions, general and legal. i’ll reference both, but the message they carry is essentially the same, so i’ll just paraphrase the united nations definition that’s party to (read: supported/enforced by) 170 countries:

torture is any act that intentionally causes SEVERE harm to someone, physical OR mental, for the purposes of extracting information or punishment for failure to do so, with explicit consent from an acting public authority.

i’ll break down those components in the context of the dsmp in a second, but i first want to make it very clear what torture ISN’T. torture is not manipulation, it is not "trauma” in the way trauma is broadly conceived, it is not even direct physical abuse. you can suffer abuse from, say, a parent or a partner, and that abuse is about a power dynamic, where one person is being forcibly subordinated to the other. torture, on the other hand, is not necessarily about power, and it’s definitely not ONLY about power dynamics; torture, by its very definition, has to be intensely and officially coercive, and it has to be SEVERE. there are not degrees of torture, like there are degrees of abuse: being deprived of sleep for days or even weeks at a time is just as psychologically impactful as losing a limb or being waterboarded (simulated drowning- a common torture method that the us has been known to employ).

this is my first major issue with the way some viewers of the dsmp approach this whole debacle. i constantly hear c!tommy’s manipulation by c!dream cited as a perfect justification for c!dream’s torture. what c!tommy, and others on the server- particularly the kids- went through is horrible, and intensely traumatic. i will never deny them that, especially as a survivor of abuse myself, but torture is not just another form of trauma. that’s a very important distinction that we, as viewers, have to draw: torture is considerably worse because it is sanctioned, it is coercive, and its explicit goal is not just to cause pain or make someone feel powerless (common goals of abusers), but instead to shatter someone.

in more specific terms, the mental goal of torture is to completely unmake someone’s conception of the world, how they interact with it, and their basic sense of identity. if you read accounts or speak with survivors of torture, it is frequently mentioned that their very way of processing everything in life was destroyed by pain and had to be rebuilt, completely different, after escape. by destroying one’s individuality, will, and their most integral of processing abilities, you destroy their grasp on the world; and, to put it lightly, such a breaking event is awful enough that, in an effort to make it stop and regain some sense of normalcy, the victim will tell their persecutors what they want to hear. it’s the reason why confessions obtained through torture are notoriously not admissible in courts of law. this goes far beyond abuse or manipulation, and i need everyone to understand that.

now, let’s get to c!dream’s situation. did he do awful things? yes, undoubtedly. i’m a c!dream apologist, but his manipulation of c!tommy and c!tubbo was very fucked up. beyond that, his notable “crimes” that others on the server aren’t also guilty of committing (e.g., murder, theft, arson, to name a few common ones) really just consist of especially massive destruction of property (people leave c!techno and c!phil out of this equation, much to my chagrin, but i won’t get into it here). punishment for his actions is understandable, and is typically what justice systems aim to do. but, even if we completely ignore the inherent inhumanity of pandora (HOOO BOY that’s a lot to ignore but i digress), c!dream is not being punished, he’s being tortured. 

going by the definition i used, let’s break it down:

c!sam knows what c!quackity is doing to c!dream, allows it, and even encourages it. as the warden, he is the person in an official, authority position giving their consent. 

c!quackity is, by his own admission, doing what he is to get information out of c!dream. it’s not a confession in this context, but very specific piece of knowledge, with the promise of death also hanging right above it.

list of extreme psychological abuse: long-term solitary confinement (torture if it’s more than 22 hours. c!dream has been in solitary confinement for more than 60 days now), deprivation of the passage of time, general verbal abuse, incredibly limited social contact (people start to fray without basic interaction after a while).

list of extreme physical abuse (god where do i start): prolonged starvation, malnourishment when he isn’t being starved (you will die without protein intake); use of Warden’s Will Breaker pickaxe (it can hack through obsidian, so i think that’s all i need to say), shears (can be used to do things like pull nails, break limb’s bones, amputate toes/fingers/a whole arm in c!ponk’s case), and an OP axe (a sharp blade capable of slicing easily through wood with brute force, and bone is significantly easier to crush than wood). 

so, we have consent of authority, coercion for the sake of extracting information, and severe physical/mental abuse meant solely to cause extreme pain. c!dream is being tortured according to the proper, internationally-sanctioned definition of the term, and that is not okay in any circumstances whatsoever. 

if you haven’t ever read survivors’ accounts (or the accounts of their victimizers), it’s difficult to understand just how uniquely despicable torture is, and the lifelong effects that remain after it’s over and done with. i honestly recommend you read some testimonials, because it absolutely changes the way you view authority and the world in general.

no one is deserving of this treatment, no matter what atrocities they may or may not have committed. 

it’s a basic tenet of human rights, and i don’t think it should be a hard pill to swallow that it’s never excusable in any circumstance. so, defend c!tommy & co. and criticize c!dream’s actions all you want, but please never say that torture is alright. that statement has real consequences, and real moral implications. don’t be an asshole, and don’t be disrespectful to people who have survived it.

if you’re curious, look into these events:

The Argentine Dirty War

Chicago Police’s Jon Burge and his torture regime

Abu Ghraib prison

Extensive torture by Pinochet’s regime in Chile

Guatemalan Civil War

Ugandan policing in the 21st century (Human Rights Watch report here)

if you want some reading, i recommend the following. tumblr will probably nerf this post because of links, but oh well.

Convention against Torture and Other Cruel, Inhuman or Degrading Treatment or Punishment

Elaine Scarry’s The Body in Pain: The Making and Unmaking of the World (very important work in the literature on torture) 

John Conroy’s Unspeakable Acts, Ordinary People: The Dynamics of Torture

Levenson (e.d.) Torture: A Collection

[novasaysacab]

Animated Characters Who Need Therapy

Steven Universe from Steven Universe

Reasons-

1. Canon PTSD

2. Raised as a child soilder basically

3. Can’t relate to literally anyone else in SPACE

4. Peer pressure and a skewed sense of self worth since he grew up getting blamed for his mother leaving by some

5. Has been attacked and almost murdered dozens of times

6. Coded from a young age to fix everyone else’s problems but running away from his own

Lena Saberwing (or De Spell) from Ducktales 2017

Reasons-

1. Mentally, emotionally, physically, and verbally abused/manipulated by a parental figure

2. Tortured by said parental figure

3. A living shadow stuck in the shadow realm for who knows how long all alone

Della Duck from Ducktales 2017

Reasons-

1. Stranded on the moon for a decade

2. Continuously attacked by monsters

3. Lost a body part in the crash

4. Isolated and desperate for contact and communication with another intelligent life form

5. Shows signs of PTSD after coming back from the moon

6. Defiantly has some childhood trauma mixed in since Scrooge raised her (same could be said for the triplets, especially Louie)

Catra from She-Ra and the Princesses of Power

Reasons-

1. Raised as a child soilder

2. Emotionally, physically, and psychologically abused/manipulated by two parental figures

3. Doesn’t have a healthy outlet like Adora, or she does and chooses not to use it

Dipper Pines from Gravity Falls

Reasons-

1. Has been in multiple life threatening situations, probably having some physical and mental scars from said situations

2. Has a messed up superioroity complex where he has to be the best in certain situations

3. Might have some OCD (his obsession with lists)

4. Has trouble letting go of things (the truth about Nathaniel Northwest, how Mabel was a millimeter talker than he was, etc.)

5. Lived through the freaking apocalypse

Stanford Pines from Gravity Falls

Reasons-

1. Had his dreams ruined by his brother (accidentally)

2. Stuck being seen as a joke for years

3. Made a stupid deal with a literal demon, causing major reprocussions later down the line

4. Became paranoid as said demon started control every aspect of his life, falling into hysteria and hiding his research he spent years finding

5. Got stuck in a demon dimension for decades facing who knows what kinds of horrors

6. Only to come back and face said demon yet again

Miles Morales from Into the Spider-Verse

Reasons-

1. Not only saw his worlds Spider-Man die, but his uncle as well

2. Hunted by an actual mob boss and almost killed by said mob boss

3. Was put in a situation where he not only has to save his world from collapsing but multiple other worlds as well

Molly Blyndeff from Epithet Erased

Reasons-

1. Neglected by her father and sister after her mother passed

2. Has to run a toy store on her own (does her family’s taxes as well) and she’s like ten or twelve (I don’t remember her exact age right now)

3. May have some PTSD linked to fire shown when the museum caught fire how fast she fell apart

I’m sure I missed a few reasons and some characters, but I recently rewatched Gravity Falls and got emotional. Feel free to add more!

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

Ehat is your favourite rwby moment? Or moments if you are indecisive.

I don't like picking favorites but you gave me the option of Multiple so here's the ones I really really like:

Ren killing the Nuckelavee. I got into RWBY in volume 4 and this was The Moment for me, the one where I really, really respected what the show could do in terms of character and storyline. That entire fight felt so goddamn satisfying.

The triple awakening of Penny becoming the Winter Maiden, Oscar using magic, and Ruby using her silver eyes. That scene was just so goddamn cool how they shot it, and Penny was one of my favorite characters anyway so her becoming the Maiden is just a really cool moment of affirmation. Even if her being the Maiden turned out to be a bad thing down the line, I still refrain that Penny as is was meant to be a Maiden, and the problems came in when people tried to make her into a Maiden rather than let her decide what being a Maiden meant.

Qrow stopping the bomb. Qrow suffered this massive setback at the beginning of the volume, but I liked how even if he thought he was back to square one, the show didn't treat it as such. He opened up to Robyn and admitted he was hurting. He listened to her when she told him that he was better than petty vengeance. He tried to get through to Harriet and he finally made the choice to take a leap of faith that he could be more than the bad luck charm he believed himself to be. Characters in this show get better, get worse, have setbacks, but none of it is ever wasted. No one is exactly who they were before, and all the progress Qrow made before still existed in the middle of his relapse and helped save and transform him. Seeing how his Semblance is a metaphor for depression and I've struggled with the exact same thing, it was a massive balm to see this on screen. I've said before I don't pick favorites, but Qrow's arc is definitely one of the top 3 moments in the show because of how much it resonated with me.

The other shoe dropping in Gravity. I'm a sucker for a good villain arc, and what makes it so good is that this isn't treated as a "well he's evil now ". This is the tipping point and he spends the rest of the volume and volume 8 falling further and further until he's helpless on the floor and it is finally, finally too late to turn back. The ultimate tragedy of Ironwood is that at every moment he had an opportunity to turn back... and yet refused each one. It was the moment when I fully understood where they were going with him and how good it was going to be, and I enjoyed it thoroughly.

Cinder getting her groove back near the end of volume 8. I always hated how people insisted that Cinder was a useless or one-note villain because her trauma (and bad luck) was interfering, so this felt like vindication. They needed her to be off her game all those volumes because it took them this long to actually match up to her. She has finally, definitely, won. And she's about to find out how hollow that is.

Maria and Neo fighting. I dislike smug villains (not in a case of they're bad writing, more in a case of i just hate smug people in general), so seeing Maria knock her down a peg was quite satisfying. Plus, I'm a sucker for "plain old combat experience trumps tricks" any day, and how it reinforced what Maria said to Ruby about how the most important thing was to keep on training and learning.

Emerald's freak out moment with the Salem illusion. It was just so creepy and cool.

The Apathy, because they hit so close to home and because of Ruby's silver eyes and Qrow's alcoholism intersecting with it so well. While we're at it, the Hound as well. This show does horror very well.

Yang reading Raven for filth, both times. All those years of psychological manipulation and she wasn't having it.

Salem manipulating Cinder into staying on her side after electrocuting her with the arm. It was masterfully done and just underscored what an absolute monster she could be. Doesn't hurt that it was followed up by her shattering Atlas' defenses.

Ren seeing everyone's emotions. I am a HUGE sucker for characters gaining new senses, I loved Ren's entire Atlas arc (introverts being allowed to introvert and gaining power and understanding through that! what a concept!) and the visuals were so goddamn cool. Also, more magical girl powers.

Penny gazing into the stars after she decides to hold up Amity. In a volume about how Penny's choices were limited and the tragedy that followed, it was a great moment that showed how deeply Penny loved the people she cared for and the world she was born into, and how magnificent she could have been if she'd been allowed to fully realize herself. Helps that I'm a firm proponent of the Penny 3.0 theory so I see this as potential foreshadowing for when Penny truly comes into her own.

[doomed-prophetess]

2/2 ahh before i forget, this is an addition to my rambling about athy having depression? i think i forgot momentarily (i hope i didn’t but just to make sure let’s assume i forgot) that ana was also most likely abused. and, i really don’t want to pull a “this person suffered much worse than this person, therefore...” because trauma is trauma regardless of its severity and i don’t want to dismiss ana’s trauma in any way. it’s different for everyone and we can’t compare two people’s trauma. it’s not right. but what i meant was, claude and anastacius went through different situations. claude was the youngest and an illegitimate child at that, so he got the short end of the stick. while anastacius (again, he was still abused) was favored being the eldest and the crown prince, son of the empress (i’m so glad she’s dead).

also! super interesting there’s parallels here as well right? claudes mother loved him, while the empress most likely did not love anastacius. she wants power. she manipulates and pushes him into becoming emperor. and her love is conditional. if he loves her, he will become emperor. she cares about him because her child is her link to the emperor/power. but please don’t think i’m justifying how awful these two brothers were, especially claude. ack i don’t wanna justify any character’s behavior 😭 even if they are trying to be better people it will never fix the harm that they have done, and it’s not justified by black magic or a sad backstory. like they don’t spend enough time talking about it. and there’s also something to be said about athy having to work for her father’s love and not the other way around, honestly...

speaking of inherited trauma, i wonder why diana decided that yes, she wanted to have a baby with claude. like i don’t expect them to have our understanding on why having children when there’s a history of mental illness/addiction in the family is going to result in the child being most likely to also have it, even if you want to say they will be ok. but even without this knowledge i still find it strange, knowing how violent the history of the imperial family is, it is going to affect your child somehow, no matter how much you shelter them from it. did claude tell her? assuming diana knows, why would she have a child in the same place where so many atrocities happened aaaa 😭😭☠️

and last addition i swear, more than mental illness, lucas has untreated trauma. i think i called it mental illness but yeppp it’s more trauma and ur right in lucas and athy’s case it feels more like trauma bonding over their abusive childhoods. and there’s a long, LONG way to go for lucas to be good in my books. not sticking up for him like i said. there wasn’t any redemption for him and no one ever called him out for his mistakes. he sort of felt it when claude was in a coma and athy was having her dark thoughts and i wanted him to show more character development SO BADLY. to feel the consequences of his actions. he pretty much sets the events of this story in motion. i do wonder if part of his immaturity and lack of empathy is being desensitized since he’s been alive for centuries. you say the manhwa is ending? aeternitas died way too easily, and lucas still needs like five more arcs and of him being regretful and powerless before i consider his character has actually grown. still angry at this dude sorry 😀

ok now i’ll go back to sleep x

The thing with Ana is that psychological abuse is harder to spot since it does not leave visible scars. In the few panels of their childhood we have seen two panels where Claude is bruised and it's enough to tell that his abuse was severe. However it's hard to tell with Ana. While we do have a scene where the Empress yells at him, we don't know if this was an only time thing or not. And if it wasn't: how often did she do it?

I read somewhere that screaming at a child seems to have similar effects, especially if it’s pervasive enough and ongoing, to hitting. Basically the same parts of the brain are activated, you show the the same fear mechanisms as to smacking, the same neurotransmitters are released and allegiently it leads to some fairly harmful psychological effects over time.

Was it only psychological abuse the empress employed if she already had a history of animal cruelity and child abuse, possibly also abuse against the servants? It seems to me fairly possibly that she could have hit Ana in the heat of the moment. Besides how hard did she push him to suceed? Did she isolate him from the outside world, deny him time with his friends to make room for his extra lessons? Was he forced to study until late at night until his nose bleed and he felt dizzy from stress? A pressure to perform can quickly turn into another form of abuse as well. And let's not forget that besides performing his duties as the crown prince he was also practically parenting baby Claude when he himself was only around 12-14 years old. Not conding anything but Ana redirecting his anger to someone defenseless and blaming Claude was almost inevitable especially when his mother encouraged him.

Regarding the black magic argument. I see it similar to drunk driving. Adult Claude knew the dangers of alcohol/black magic and chose to consume it anyway before driving. He didn't care for the consequences (death of civilians/Athy), but Ana was a child when he was introduced to dark magic at a young age by another adult with bad intentions and got practically forced to consume it (Aeternitas trying to get into his head). Ana also only attempted to kill one person while Claude committed mass murder. As Anastacius de Alger Obelia's defense attorny I must say I would let him go due to lack of supporting evidence.

About Lucas idk anymore. Spoon apparently decided to scratch the plotline about his abusive childhood and basically made him a god? Baby Lucas just popped into existence and the magician adopted him?? So is his lack of empathy because he's not human or did he lie, because he felt uncomfortable to talk to Athy about his terrible childhood? Who knows. And Diana...can't analyse her. She's basically a white man's fantasy.

[thelastunison]

continuation to the “adam has c-ptsd” thing

cw/ detailed talk about interpersonal trauma as a subject

Disclaimer: I am not a professional. I only learn about psychology as a hobby (for the moment). Also, since I have the same disorder myself, it's possible that I unconsciously apply my own perspective. So take this analysis/theory with a bit of salt, please.

I’m just gonna start off right with another quote to analyse

“The cold stars shone in mockery, and the bare trees waved their branches above me; now and then the sweet voice of a bird burst forth amidst the universal stillness. All, save I, were at rest or in enjoyment”

Once again, it has to do with the disconnect one feels towards the rest of the world. What sticks out here is the “All, save I, were at rest or in enjoyment”. This meaning how one feels as though noone could ever understand what one had to endure. How oneself was “the only one” to be forced to go through what they had to go through, while everyone else was spared of the pain. The only reason one had to experience all of it itself being the circumstances under which the person was born.

“There was none among the myriads of men that existed who would pity or assist me; and should I feel kindness towards my enemies?”

The ‘enemies’ part might feel a bit exaggerated when talking about people with the disorder, but I still think it’s a somewhat reliable quote to choose for the point I wanna make. The way I interpret this in the context of the C-PTSD thing is how repeated abandonment and/or neglect from people one had to experience leads towards strong distrust, and sometimes a straight up refusal to attempt to trust people. Some people prefer to ‘hide’ said distrust and try to cooperate with others nevertheless. Others do not want to hide it and don’t see a reason as to why they should. Or what worth it has to treat others with respect when noone bothered to show said respect to oneself. Adam would be an example for the latter one.

“You, my creator, would tear me to pieces and triumph; remember that, and tell me why I should pity man more than he pities me?”

another quote for the previous point.

“sometimes I allowed my thoughts, unchecked by reason, to ramble in the fields of Paradise, and dared to fancy amiable and lovely creatures sympathizing with my feelings and cheering my gloom; their angelic countenances breathed smiles of consolation. But it was all a dream; no Eve soothed my sorrows nor shared my thoughts; I was alone.”

It’s important to note that C-PTSD is...well, a complex disorder. Contradicting feelings can and often do exist within the same person. In this case it shows in how, despite his hatred towards human kind, the Creature still yearns for the company of a human being. He still yearns for someone to show him compassion and attempts to reason with people and show them kindness. Some examples would be when he saved a little girl from drowning or how he hoped to befriend William at first. Or his offer towards Victor to leave human kind in peace if he could make a companion for him. Despite his hatred, he didn’t enjoy being violent. Does that make it okay that he killed innocent people? of course not. But this isn’t what this whole post is about.

“How can I thank you, my best and only benefactor? From your lips first have I heard the voice of kindness directed towards me; I shall be forever grateful” 

 What is also important to remember is that Adam isn’t being insincere whe he says these things. He’s by nature a very sensitive being. When he feels emotions, he feels them very strongly.

One symptom of C-PTSD is having strong difficulties with expressing, categorizing or in his case controlling emotions. He isn’t as angry and even aggressive as he is for the sake of manipulating people. He simply isn’t capable of filtering out these emotions.

“Oh! My creator, make me happy; let me feel gratitude towards you for one benefit! Let me see that I excite the sympathy of some existing thing; do not deny me my request!”

Despite Adam despising Victor, his father, he still seeks validation from him. Simply because he doesn’t know who else to turn to.

There’s also the whole revenge thing. Now, it is very uncommon for someone with C-PTSD to actually seek out revenge. Though having revenge thoughts is a common occurence. I don't have any specific quote to insert here rn but I assume it's not necessary for those who've read the book since Adams revenge is like... The main part of the story.

Might add more later but for now I think this is all I have to say about the topic. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

Edit: Forgot to add this to the last part of the analysis! Understandably enough, it can be extremely difficult to forgive ones main abuser,- or any past abusers really. Especially when the mind is constantly preoccupied with all the harm that's been done to oneself. This seems to be the case for the Creature, though admittedly I don't have any quotes to support this right now. This ends up manifesting in constant bitterness towards said abuser(s), which is very hard to get rid of even if the healthiest thing would be to "let go". Adams Bitterness is very clear to see at several points of his storytelling. That's how the previously mentioned vengeful feelings and thoughts come to exist in the first place. Not sure just how relevant this actually is to the analysis but I thought it might be interesting to know anyways.

Edit 2: Forgot to mention another symptom!

I was looking at the frankenstein quotes I have and realised I forgot to mention that the Creature constantly seeks for someone to “save” him, which is also a C-ptsd symptom! Some examples would be the previously mentioned “no Eve soothed my sorrows” quote, the De Lacey one and this:

“If any being felt emotions of benevolence towards me, I should return them a hundred and a hundredfold; for that one creature’s sake I would make peace with the whole kind!”