#and then i went and watched the preview for next week. what the absolute FUCK

[iholli]

literally I just want to give MAWS Clark a hug can we give this man a break please he's baby

[finchers-ipad]

‘David Fincher: Interviews’ Edited by Laurence F. Knapp book highlights!!

I just finished this book and it was SOOO fucking interesting, here are some of my favourite quotes from it :))

-"Because of the horrible Aliens thing, every time I hear the name Fox, it just makes me shrivel. I lose circulation in my hands and feet and I think I'm going to become a quadruple amputee.”

-"I never thought it was scary at all. I turned to the editor and said, 'My God, what have we done? We've totally let people down in the fucking terror department; we need to go shoot some dismembered bodies. Go and see if you can get someone from a morgue and chop 'em up. "

-"Right up to when we finished, I just didn't think it was violent enough. I was like, We've got a movie called Fight Club, we might as well call it Glee Club?”

-"There was absolutely nothing fun about making the movie." He gives the matter a little more thought. "Nope," he finally decides. "Nothing."

-DRE: Is Jared Leto tired of getting the crap beaten out of him in your movies? DF: He's perfect for it, isn't he? If there is any guy you want to see get his face burned off it's him.

- So now I have kids in my daughter's school who go: "Man, I love Fight Club," and you go: "Why are your parents letting you watch that? Don't come near my kid."

-I remember being a little bit, 'Uh-oh’ And Brad's drunk and Edward's drunk and Helena's drunk and they're all like, ‘It's great and we love it' and I'm like, That's fantastic. You did notice that there were six hundred other people there who walked out ready to lynch us?'"

-You know, it's like accountants and lawyers all love The Game, and college students and perverts all like Se7en.

- Empire: You've been developing Heavy Metal and Torso, among other projects. Any idea what you're doing next? Fincher: I'm sleeping for six months! I think I'm whoring myself out to come to fly around Europe and defend my honor, but I don't honestly know.

-Look, people come up to me and say, "You started torture porn." And I say, "Fuck you."

- "So it's about fighting." And they went out and sold ads for this movie on World Wrestling Federation. [audience laughs] I said, "You know, the crowd who go to the WWF are going to be made a little uncomfortable. Certainly the opening weekend, they're going to be like, 'Dude, that was gay."

-"aside from being completely unusable, it's fantastic!" They are close to wrapping the final Swedish stint of the production before flying back to LA, where they'll take the weekend off before the last week of shooting. "That gives me two days of uncontrollable weeping," says Fincher.

-"There's a quote from a film critic that David had enlarged, framed, and hung in his conference room," says Social Network writer Aaron Sorkin. "It calls Fight Club 'amoral and Godless.' I think he'd rather have that quote than a Palme d'Or."

other random things:

- Fincher came up with “ikea boy”

- Brad Pitt riding a segway around Fincher’s office and trying to convince him to join him. this was in an interview for benjamin button, and then years later in an interview for ‘the girl with the dragon tattoo’ the interviewer says there is a segway in Fincher’s office, in this article, he is also described as a ‘Segway-riding gearhead’.

- if i took a shot every time Fincher or Ed Norton compared ‘fight club’ to ‘the graduate’, i would be dead from alcohol poisoning 

- my favourite interview was ‘Forget the First Two Rules of Fight Club’ by Nev Pierce for ‘Total Film’, it was so funny and well written and interviews Fincher, Norton, Pitt and HBC. i think you can find a preview of it online but PLEASE read it if you like fight club because is so fucking good!!!

[sugoi-and-spice]

ok first off i love love love play nice ur such a good writer! if ur willing i’d like to request something w bully!dabi just being kind of a scum bag to reader💖

*deep inhale* *claps* Anon.

First off, thank you so much for the kind words! And second, thank you so much for this ask! You have created an absolute monster with it lol. Seriously, I got so into this idea that it is currently at 6500 words pre-smut. I'm thinking it's going to end up at least 10k, probably will need to be broken up into at least two chapters. And I'm already getting ideas for a beyond...

...I swear this is exactly how Play Nice went from a One-Shot to 25 Chapters lol.

So, while it's probably going to be a couple of weeks still before this goes out, please enjoy this little WIP preview of:

...Untitled High School AU Bully!Dabi x Reader Fic

(I suck at titles, sorry lol)

[preview]

If a boy is picking on you, it means he likes you.

That’s what your mother always used to say.

“I told you to get me orange juice.”

You flinched at the venom in Dabi’s tone as he glared up at you with genuine disgust from his desk. You stood in front of him, ready for your reprimand like a dutiful employee. A good little slave.

“So what the fuck is this?” he demanded, grabbing the can you’d presented to him and waving it in your face.

You dropped your gaze to the ground, hands wringing anxiously. It wasn’t just the heat of Dabi’s glare or the bite of his words that was making it hard to stay standing. The sadistic amusement of his friends — your other classmates, Jin and Keigo — perched lazily on the desks around him were just as painful.

“T-They were out of orange juice,” you stammered, “So I got you orange-flavored tea…”

Dabi watched you, waiting for any more qualifications, any last excuses. But your eyes stayed down, lips stayed shut. The only change was in your now shuffling feet.

He popped open the tab and took a drink.

“Hmm.”

Hope swelled in your chest. Maybe you’d done enough this time. You looked up tentatively. Bored, piercing blue awaited you. He held you there for a moment, letting you think, letting you settle into relief and security.

Catching you in a trap.

“It’s fucking disgusting.”

Your heart dropped.

“Get this shit out of my face.”

And suddenly he threw the open can straight at your chest with audible force. It doused your uniform and then clattered and splashed onto the desk and floor.

Jin snorted out a laugh, “Oh shit.”

Keigo watched for your reaction, noticeably silent.

“Seriously, how can you be this useless?” Dabi spat, pulling his legs off the desk before any of the tea could bleed onto his shoes.

Dripping, you tried desperately to fight the quiver from your lip. It was not a fight you were winning.

Dabi stood with an annoyed sigh.

“Now I’ve gotta go get it myself. Happy?

You didn’t dare respond, not with that familiar lump growing larger and larger in your throat. If you so much as breathed in that moment, you’d cry for sure. And crying in front of Dabi would only make things worse.

So much worse.

“Better clean up your mess before class starts if you don’t want to get in trouble.” he called back as he made his way to the door, Jin close behind him.

Keigo stayed for a moment, watching with furrowed brows as you knelt down on trembling legs into the spreading orange-tinted puddle. 

“Oi, Bird Brain. Let’s go!”

He quickly turned on his heel, following the call without a second thought.

You picked the can up, fruitlessly trying to stop the spill — it was practically empty at this point.

If a boy is picking on you, it means he likes you.

You could almost laugh.

By that logic, Dabi must’ve been fucking in love with you. That thought finally made the tears start to spill. Not because of how ridiculous it was or how isolating it felt.

But because it was exactly what you wanted.

You’d known him most of your life. You’d known him as the rowdy, energetic boy that lived next door. As the resident big brother for everyone in the neighborhood. The one that never stopped laughing, never stopped running — that always wanted to play outside.

The one who’d seen you wringing your hands anxiously on your new front lawn as your Mom directed movers into the house, staring longingly at the kids playing cops and robbers at the end of the cul-de-sac. The one that had immediately taken your hand and asked your Mom if you could come and play.

You’d known him when he was Touya Todoroki.

[monstermince]

no one asked for it, but my initial baffled reaction to kpop the musical closing after two weeks:

I've read the articles about the directing team's comments on how disappointed they are that the musical hasn't made the money needed to keep running, and I feel for them -- I wanted this all API cast and director/lyricist/etc show to succeed SO MUCH. However, there were some very weird decisions made about the optics of this show, which I want to ramble about as someone who loves musicals, is ethnically Chinese, and had a whole kpop phase:

Titles matter and they named the musical KPOP. lmfao why would you do this. No one is going to take your musical seriously with that name. America already knows about kpop (I see u, McDonald's x BTS). I literally take psychic damage every time I see its name. Why did they think it was a good idea 😭 kpop as a term has TOO many bad/shallow connotations, you cannot.

Marketing was Bad. The plot was not described in an interesting and clear way; the press I saw presented it as something about different kpop groups coming together to perform a show. But they haven't even released the soundtrack (it's not coming out until next year) so no one has any idea what the songs are like and what the story even is, unless you went to the previews which were cancelled early because of covid.

Not knowing the songs means there's no way to know if this musical about kpop groups has any substance or commentary about a fucked up industry, which i feel like is what half of the potential audience would want (me included. I saw when SNSD did a broadcast where the group went to donate blood, and the leader of SNSD straight up was told she couldn't because she's too underweight and anemic. I watched Kpop company giants send their artists into China to get that M money, without teaching them Chinese very well, making them go on talk shows and making their Chinese artists pick up the extra task of leading their teammates through this all. Is it any wonder so many chinese artists left these companies.) You have to be so willfully oblivious to think you can make a musical about kpop artists and not address the hell these artists perform under). However, there's also a chance that this musical was made to market/sell kpop to a larger american audience that wouldn't seek out kpop on their own, in which case, probably there is no substance to the plot, just bops (not to knock the bops). The issue is WE JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT THE BOOK ENTAILS.

Asian actors just don't get taken seriously in the entertainment industry here. There was NO buzz about an all API cast, not like hamilton got for an all POC cast (and there was only one asian actress cast). Andrea Macasaet, who has been ABSOLUTELY MIND BLOWING as Six's Broadway Anne Boleyn straight up said that she was about to quit the industry and get trained to work up the corporate ladder for Lululemon before auditioning for Six one last time, because the industry is so inaccessible.

It just feels like these are such obvious things that overshadow the musical, and you HAVE to get a marketing/publicity team who can address this. You can make fake insta accounts for your fictional kpop groups (which they did 🤦‍♀️) AFTER you address this.

[iclaimedtobethebetterbard]

popcorn & pronouns

Fandom: Sanders Sides Characters: Janus, Remus, Roman Rating: Teen & up Relationships: Dukeceit, Creativitwins  Warnings: Not much to warn for in this one. Language, a little bit of suggestiveness, vague non-detailed descriptions of a horror movie.  Word count: 3402

Read on AO3!

My writing masterpost

Starlight Universe masterpost

Dukeceit Week 2021 start - previous - here - next - masterpost

Summary: A movie night date leads to an important conversation. Already being t4t makes it a lot easier. Or, in Remus's own words, “This is just, like, going to be a week of people coming out to me, I guess. Huh.”

Notes: Day 6 of Dukeceit Week 2021! Almost there! @dukeceitweek Takes place in my Starlight Universe, where each piece can be read without any context. Takes place 9 months after college; at the start of the story, Janus uses only they/them pronouns. 

-- 

“Ooh, popcorn! Can I have some?” Roman popped his head into the kitchen of the apartment he, Remus, and Logan had shared in the nine or so months since they had all graduated college.

“No, Jan and I are having a date in twenty minutes,” Remus said, waving Roman off without looking away from the air popper.

“Okay, I don’t see how that’s relevant to my question.” Roman pushed himself to sit on the counter by the sink. “I mean, that’s really cute, I hope you have fun. But can I have some popcorn?”

Remus rolled his eyes. “Make your own when I’m done.”

“But you make it better!” Roman pouted overdramatically.

Remus raised an eyebrow. “All I do is plug in the machine?”

“Right, which is better than me doing it.” Roman grinned at them. “Less work for me.”

“Hey!” Remus swatted his arm. “The transphobia, honestly—”

“Well, if you making it for me is transphobic to you, then you not making it for me is—” Roman broke off quite suddenly, his expression undergoing several shifts very fast that Remus could not make sense of. Which was… unusual, to say the least. Roman was normally the one person they could always count on understanding. They didn’t like this new development one bit.

“Ro?”

“Iiiiiit’s… queerphobic to me,” Roman said at last, a worried pinch to his eyebrows. He laughed, and it almost didn’t sound forced. “So we’re at a tie, so you should just make me popcorn.”

“First of all, I’m queer too, make your own damn popcorn. Second—” Remus turned away from the popcorn machine and gave Roman his full attention, leaning back against the kitchen island and tilting his head to the side. “Do you wanna talk about whatever the fuck that was?” So far as Remus knew, Roman was bi; that was the label he’d been using for years and years, so long that it practically felt like forever. Since almost the very beginning of high school. Since before Remus had questioned their gender, even. Only last week, he’d called the light switch biphobic without hesitation when it broke.

Whatever had happened to make him so very deliberately not call himself bi just now, it was new.

Roman’s expression closed up very fast indeed, but not before Remus caught a flash of something he was almost certain was fear. “No.”

“You know it’s okay to question, right?” Remus inquired awkwardly. “No matter what specifically, and no matter what the outcome is? Yeah?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You know I’d still love you no matter what, right? Even if you were, like, a straight man—like, I would make so many jokes about not agreeing with your lifestyle, but—Ro, you know everything is always gonna be okay, right?”

Roman glared at him. “Remus, I don’t want to talk about it.” He wrinkled his nose. “And I’m definitely not straight.”

Remus blinked and raised their hands. “Alright. I didn’t mean literally straight, I just meant—you could be literally whatever, and it would be cool. That was—like—the most extreme example I could think of, you know?”

Roman let out a slight huff of laughter. “Thanks,” he said reluctantly after a pause. “It’s nothing, though.”

“Bullshit,” Remus said immediately.

“It—” Roman swallowed. “I need it to be nothing, okay?”

“If anyone’s making you feel shitty, I’ll beat them up,” Remus said immediately. “Even if it’s Patton. Just drop the names. I’ll do it. I’ll—”

“Remus, it’s fine. I want to stop fucking talking about it now!” Roman snapped.

Remus hesitated, fumbling for what to do or say next, everything about the conversation feeling just a little wrong and sideways.

Roman sighed. “Sorry.” He pushed off the counter, went to the fridge, and stared into it for a solid thirty seconds, then took a cheese stick out of the door. “I’ll make my own popcorn later,” he mumbled and retreated back to his room.

“Damn, alright,” Remus said to the empty room. “Be like that, I guess.” They flung their hands into the air and went to get the butter they’d been melting in the microwave before Roman’s appearance.

Roman would talk to them about it, whatever it was, eventually. He always did. And whatever was bugging him, Remus would figure out a way to bug it back until it stopped and Roman was all happy and bubbly again. Because that was what Remus always did. It would be fine. It was just a waiting game.

Remus sighed. He always hated waiting.

***

“Mmkay,” Remus said, when Janus had arrived, and they had worked together to move the TV out of the living room and into Remus’s room, and they had settled in on Remus’s bed—Remus sitting up against the headboard and Janus half-laying in Remus’s lap with their long thin legs stretched out along the bed and their head on his chest—and the popcorn had been set beside them where they could both reach it, and the blanket nest had been fluffed once more. “What shall we watch?”

Janus was silent for a long moment. Actually, come to think of it, they had been quiet since they’d arrived at the apartment—even more quiet than usual. But Remus was almost certain they weren’t nonverbal, seeing as they had exchanged a few fond words with him. It just hadn’t been very many words.

“Janny, baby?” Remus leaned forward, over their shoulder, trying to catch a glimpse of their face.

Janus had their fingers knotted in the blanket that was spread over their lap, fidgeting with it anxiously, a thinking-hard expression on their face.

“Baby?” Remus curled one hand lightly around theirs. “You good?”

“Choices are too hard right now,” Janus said at last.

“Okay, that’s okay. Do you know what you need?”

“I want to watch a movie.” Janus frowned. “I just can’t choose.”

“Gotcha. No problem.” Remus pressed a kiss to their cheek. “I’m really good at choosing.” He threaded his fingers through Janus’s long hair, scratching soothingly at their scalp in just the way he knew they liked, and pulled up the library of movies, switching from Roman’s profile to his own.

“How’s some really cheesy horrible horror film we can make fun of sound?” he asked, scrolling with the remote and still playing with Janus’s hair with his other hand. “I know we have a bunch of those, I loved ’em when we were kids and I think they’re funny.”

“That sounds fine.” Janus nodded and relaxed a little further against Remus.

“Good.” He kissed the top of their head. “Do you need anything else?”

Janus shook their head. “I’ve just been kind of stressed lately. Work’s been shit, and all that. It’s fine. I just want to cuddle and things.”

“Ooh, ‘and things,’ I like the sound of that,” Remus teased, sliding his hand gently to their chin and drawing them to twist around far enough that he could kiss them soft and slow.

“I didn’t say what kinds of things,” Janus said innocently, their eyes still closed and so close to Remus that their lips brushed against his as they spoke. “Perhaps I could be persuaded later.”

“I’ll be sure to prepare my best arguments,” Remus said, leaning slightly up to kiss their forehead and then back down to their lips for another lazy kiss, taking his time and exploring Janus’s mouth until they sighed and melted against him.

“A compelling preview,” they murmured, their eyes still closed and the slightest smile curling at their lips.

Remus meant to make some kind of witty quip in return, really he did, but all that came out of his mouth was a quiet, awed, “Holy fuck, you’re so beautiful, Jan.”

Janus’s eyes opened and met his for a moment, soft and vulnerable, before they turned and hid their face in his neck. “Love you,” they whispered against his skin.

“Mm, I love you too,” Remus said happily, wrapping his arms securely around Janus and kissing the top of their head. “Love your pretty eyes and skin and hair and body, love how clever you are, love your scary goth clothes, love your snark, love your stims, love you—”

Janus whined wordlessly into his neck, pressing kisses to it and fisting their hands in the front of his shirt.

Remus chuckled, taking a handful of their hair and gently tugging until they looked up at him once more. “Do you want to watch a movie at all, or do you just wanna make out? Cause I’d be good with either, but if you wanna do a movie, we should get on that before we’re too distracted.”

“Oh.” Janus leaned their head back a little until it was resting against Remus’s hand. “Not that I don’t want to make out, but—”

“Nah, I gotcha. Gotta at least get through the popcorn, am I right?” Remus cast about for the remote, lost in the blanket pile, as Janus shifted about until they faced the television again.

“There it is!” Remus snatched the remote up, clicking through the library on the television until he saw the particular film he was thinking of and pulled it up. “This look good?”

“‘When moving into their new house, little do our protagonists know it is haunted by a demonic serial killer. Will they get out in time? Or will they be his next victims?’” Janus read the summary aloud. “Sounds absolutely thrilling. Extremely original. Love the bad Photoshop on the cover. I’m sure the acting will be of the highest quality.”

“Oh, yeah, it’s so shitty, I love it. So many cheesy effects and fake blood, it’s the actual stupidest shit,” Remus assured them. “I love it, though. Went as the demon thing for Halloween when I was nine. Nobody fucking knew what I was, but I had the time of my life. And got fake blood on Roman when he wasn’t looking. It was great.”

Janus chuckled, reaching up to brush their fingertips against Remus’s cheek. “Well, with such a glowing review from someone so attractive, how can I resist?” they said fondly.

“That’s the spirit!” Remus hit play.

Remus had watched this particular movie more times than they could count over the course of their childhood. He peppered commentary throughout the film:

“This is my favorite part, if you pay attention you can see her real fingertips holding onto the fake hand she’s about to get chopped off!”

“There’s a jumpscare in this scene, I know you hate those—okay, hit the skip-ten-seconds button in three, two, there. Perfect. Dumbass demon movie can’t even trust itself to be creepy without cheap scares.”

“Look, I know the mom is supposed to have some kind of hot blonde thing going on for the horny straight men in the audience, but she’s got nothing on you.”

“For some reason they made a director’s commentary and it actually includes the fake blood recipe they used, I’ll show you sometime!”

Janus, in turn, provided brilliant, extremely snarky roasts, mostly of either the actors’ absolute lack of skill or the gaping plot holes:

“Oh, yes, going alone to the attic at midnight without so much as a candle is a fantastic idea, nothing bad could possibly happen in this scene.”

“Listen, I can excuse the children because they’re about eight years old, but do you think this man has ever even heard of acting? Or even, like, speaking in a non-monotone?”

“I am truly fascinated by the special effects department’s understanding of human anatomy.”

“So, the demon feeds on misery? Why hasn’t it taken up residence in a large office building? I mean, come on, hundreds of souls in an environment designed to grind out constant levels of misery? It’s perfect. The poor thing must be starving out here in the two-point-five-kids-and-a-dog suburbs, every meal it gets is tiny. I would be so much better at its job than it is.”

At last the credits rolled.

“Wanna see pictures of the costume I made?” Remus asked.

“Sure.” Janus sounded amused.

“Lemme just—” Remus scrolled through their camera roll for a minute. “Oh, here they are.” They displayed their phone to Janus; tiny nine-year-old Remus, who sported long tangled brown hair in two ponytails, was draped in a black curtain, donated by his great-aunt, that he had very enthusiastically taken a pair of scissors to to create a tattered effect; the curtain was splattered with bright red goo, and tiny Remus had a pair of plastic knives in his hands, which were blurry in almost every photo because they’d hardly stopped making stabbing motions all evening. To their right, their little sister Gabby, who’d been six at the time, was dressed as Elastigirl and making a punching motion; to their right, Roman—who had already been a full three inches taller than Remus, even at nine—was wearing a Belle dress with a poofy skirt and a sword strapped around his waist and a huge smile that was missing one front tooth.

Remus swiped through the photos; a delightful scene unfolded, as tiny Remus posed for a few pictures, then in one was blurrily turning towards Roman, then dumping something on him, then Roman was screaming and Remus was laughing as red goo dripped down the poofy yellow skirt; Gabby watched with both hands clapped over her mouth, eyes huge.

“You two really have not changed at all, have you?” Janus asked, stifling laughter.

“Absolutely not,” Remus agreed with an answering laugh. “I think the most that either of us ever changed was when I chopped off all that hair and dyed it green.”

“When was that?” Janus asked.

“Sophomore year of high school. I did not have permission to chop it all off, but I did get permission to dye it afterwards, so that was pretty sick.”

“And that didn’t go against dress code?” Janus inquired.

“No, actually. Not sure how. But I bet my parents would’ve kicked up a big stink about it if the school tried and made me change it; they were always super big on self expression and shit.” Remus gestured towards the picture, indicating tiny Roman in his princess dress. “We always got to wear whatever we wanted, and shit like that. It was nice. Made gender shit way easier when that became a thing for me, you know?”

“It sounds nice,” Janus said softly. “I’m happy you had that.”

Remus nodded and pressed a kiss to their forehead, reaching for a handful of the popcorn dregs in the bottom of the bowl.

Janus shifted in their arms, rolling over to face Remus and propping themself up on their elbows. “Actually,” they began.

Something on their face told Remus that whatever this new topic of conversation was, it was important. He swallowed the half-chewed popcorn in his mouth. “Yeah, baby?”

“Speaking of gender.” Janus picked at the edge of the blanket.

“I love speaking of that, go on.” Remus tousled Janus’s hair fondly.

Janus took a deep breath, staring at the blanket in their hands. “I want to start using he pronouns again. In addition to my regular ones. Or.” They wrinkled their nose. “My current ones, I guess. So, he/they.”

“That’s great, he/they pronouns are very sexy,” Remus said at once.

Janus laughed, looking up at him at last. “That’s true, you are the sexiest person I know,” he said fondly. A shadow passed over his features. “But,” he went on slowly, chewing on the inside of their lip and picking at the blanket once more.

“Yeah?” Remus encouraged.

“I really don’t like the idea of telling anyone else about that.” Janus grimaced. “I keep worrying I’ll get asked stupid questions about ‘oh, so are you a man again now?’ when—like—no, and I never was one in the first place. So.”

“Oh, that sounds gross,” Remus agreed at once. “I can see why you’d be worried about that.”

Janus nodded. “I just—I don’t want to explain. And I don’t want people to ask questions. And they might. And I just—I don't want any of it. I want to skip to the part where they know and it’s all how I want it to be.”

“That’s reasonable,” Remus agreed. “But, I mean, if they can get me using he/they pronouns and being nonbinary, they had better fucking wrap their minds around the concept of you doing it too. Yeah? Or I’ll make ’em. Violently, if you want.”

Janus snorted. “I appreciate the offer, darling.” They reached up and touched his cheek. “I… don’t know if I want to tell anyone else yet. But I did want to tell you.”

“You got it, cutie.” Remus booped Janus’s nose once. “Just let me know if anything changes. I’ll punch people for you. Anytime. They don’t even have to have done anything. Just point me at them and consider it done.”

Janus did laugh at that, outright, scrunching up his face and burying it in Remus’s chest. “I should not be this into you offering to punch people for me,” he said wryly.

Remus grinned and flipped their hair. “Nah, I think it’s definitely very sexy of me and should absolutely turn you on.”

Janus smacked Remus’s arm. “I did not say that!”

“You implied it.”

“Not… necessarily. That was one possible interpretation—”

“Oh, right, I see, mmhm, very interesting.”

They smacked his arm again. “You’re teasing me.”

“Only a little bit. You’re so pretty when you get all flustered.” Remus bent their head at a somewhat awkward angle to kiss Janus’s lips gently. “Are there any new words you want me to use, by the way?” they asked. “Besides updating pronouns?”

Janus tilted his head to the side, considering. “I think… I still like all the sorts of things you call me already. Pretty, and partner, and—and baby, and so on.”

Remus smirked. “That’s good, I like calling you baby.”

“Oh my god, shut up.” Janus hid their face in their hands.

“Why, baby?” Remus asked innocently.

Janus made a strangled noise, and after a pause carried on. “I do think I wouldn’t mind adding a little bit of… masc terminology? I guess? If that makes sense? Adding that into the mix. Not all the time, and not as much as the things you already call me, but… just a bit would be nice.”

“Gotcha.” Remus nodded. “I can do that. So, like, my baby is very pretty and handsome?”

Janus’s cheeks went bright red in an instant, and he hid his face in Remus’s chest again, letting out a tiny wordless scream. “Yes. That. That—that’s nice,” they managed after a pause, sounding almost entirely composed.

Remus chuckled and ran their fingers through Janus’s hair. “Good to know,” he said teasingly. “I will definitely keep this in mind.”

“Oh my god,” Janus mumbled. “Are you trying to kill me?”

“Absolutely, but only in a sexy way of making you happy.” Remus kissed the top of their head. “This is just, like, going to be a week of people coming out to me, I guess,” they mused. “Huh.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, something’s clearly eating at someone else we know, and I think they’re going to tell me about whatever it is within the week. That’s all. It was just funny timing.” Remus kissed the top of Janus’s head again. “So, the movie’s over,” they noted, which, sure, was a blatant and deliberate change of subject, but he felt this was justified, both for avoiding-speculating-about-Roman’s-personal-information purposes and, more importantly, for fun-after-movie-things purposes.

“That it is,” Janus said, a particular innocent tone entering their voice. Excellent, he was of a similar mind to Remus, then.

Remus grinned and drew them up for a kiss. “So, what does the very pretty and handsome and lovely human in my arms want to do now?” he inquired.

Janus made another small, wordless, flustered noise and promptly dragged Remus into another kiss. “You can’t just say things like that!”

“What, about how you’re the loveliest—prettiest—sexiest—” Remus pressed tiny kisses to Janus’s lips with each word, until at last they caught his lips with their own in a proper kiss to shut him up. “Pretty sure I can say it, actually,” Remus murmured against his lips. “Cause it’s true.”

“Oh, like you’re one to talk,” Janus said, sounding very pleased indeed, and kissed them again.

--

Taglist (ask to be added/removed!): @theimprobabledreamersworld @peruviandesertfox

[onlydeadcells]

S6 EP4 discussion (spoilers below)

so I am making this solely for my own need to vent about this recent episode so bear in mind that I am in no way an articulate person so this maybe a massive mess. I'm also trying to remember this all after just watching so I apologize if i've forgotten pieces or remembered them wrong.

the opening scene was HEARTBREAKING. little charlie w the rose, poor lizzie + tommy, arthur being an emotional mess. it was also nice to see other characters like curly, charlie + jeremiah again.

the way my heart broke for lizzie multiple times throughout this episode. this poor woman has been through the roller so much this season + i wish i could just hug her and take away her pain. I must add though that Natasha O'Keefe is an absolutely stunning actress and her true talent has come through more this season w the emotional turmoil that she portrays with such effortless elegance. endless praise to her. GIVE THIS WOMAN ALL THE AWARDS OKAY.

tommy what the fuck. i don't even know if the woman he shot was the actual gypsy woman responsible for the continued curse of the sapphire or if he just went NUTS and shot up a random gypsy camp. regardless, MANS LOST IT THERE.

the anguish and grief came through after the adrenaline of that scene though and it always hits really hard when tommy shows any vulnerability or emotion, especially in relation to pain and grief as we know he doesn't really express those kind of things. he's more of a repressive person which honestly, same.

FUCK NAZIS. FUCK KARL THORNE. your father would be ASHAMED of you. ada dropping this knowledge bomb on him after he spoke about his half-sister being sent to africa by the nazis and was basically his racist self as usual. he definitely needed to be made aware of the fact that he isn't as 'protected' as he thinks he is just because he is white.

arthur + tommy's brotherly scene was really special. the shelby brother scenes were always some of my favourites in earlier seasons and I think we've lacked a lot of arthur + tommy lately so I really enjoyed that section of the ep. I also always enjoy the little moments where the brothers get nostalgic as it gives us a little more of an insight into the life they grew up with.

tommy + soberity </3 it was good while it lasted.

singing in peaky blinders always makes me lowkey cringe. that's all on that topic.

the lizzie + horse scene was so short yet so sweet. my heart really is in pieces for her.

TOMMY WHY THE FUCK U DOING THE NAZI SALUTE?! i'm honestly curious as to where they are going to take this angle in the next two episodes. I fear it maybe a bit rushed bc there seems to be so much more going on as well so it's hard to figure out where this is going. we shall see though.

GINA + MOSLEY 🤮 I am not even surprised bc that explains the weird looks and vibe we kept getting from them last season. I had to cackle when tommy straight up waltzed his way into the apartment where gina was after mosley left though (they rly did have us thinking gina + tommy were going to bonk w the preview photo bahah). good ol' tommy using blackmail to force gina into informing him on the happenings and discussions of mosley's upcoming meeting in berlin was so damn sweet. I will never be over how severely gina underestimated tommy's true intellect and power.

NO NO NO. i'm not going to even extend on this point. all i'm going to say is, if steven knight ends this final season with tommy dying I WILL FIGHT.

i am definitely missing bits from this ep but overall, although it seemed slow it really had a lot happen. I am interested as to how they are going to complete all the current stories within two episodes but we shall see in the weeks to come.

If you read the whole way through, thank you for taking the time to read my ill put together thoughts. I'll probably do another next week bc this is the only place I can really discuss the show openly w/o judgement. but for now, thank you for reading and sending you all endless best wishes + love.

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Work For It {One-Shot}***

Nick Sagar x Reader

Warning: Cursing, Strip Tease, NSFW, Mature 18+ Content, SMUT, Slight/Mild Anal Play

Words: 3.8k

Summary: It’s all fun and games until Nick gets angry and takes it out on you, but not before you give him a show.

Note: My New Year’s gift to you all.  😘 

Recommended listening once indicated is “WAP.” The second recommended listening is “Wicked Games” by Ramin Djawadi.

 HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!! 🎊🎊

Thank you all for reading. I appreciate it and you!!

If you enjoyed this, LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG  ❤️❤️

 ***Loosely Edited/Proofread***

 ~~~~~~~~

 You laughed as you walked inside the home you shared with Nick with him hot on your heels. You were feeling really good. It could have been because of all you’d had to drink that night, or maybe it was the insane amount of flirting you’d done.

 “You think this is funny. It’s not!”

The anger in Nick’s voice only made you laugh louder. Your laughter echoed through the halls of your home on your way to the kitchen.

 “It actually is quite funny,” you replied, opening the wine fridge.

 “What!? So you think it’s funny to do what you did?”

 You were too busy trying to decide between a rosé , a white, or a red wine to cap off the night that you didn’t answer. You turned and placed the three bottles on the island and looked at Nick.

 “What do you think? Pink, Red or White?”

 Nick had the cutest exasperated look on his face that was laced with anger. He was so pissed, and it turned you on immensely.

 “Really? Do you think I give a fuck about wine right now?! Y/N, you got me fucked up!”

 “Rose it is,” you said, grabbing the bottle, but before you walked away, you reached back for the white wine. “Maybe another just in case,” you added, walking around the island and out of the kitchen. You knew he was so damn close to raging.

 “Calm down. It’s not even a big deal,” you slid in, walking up the stairs to your bedroom.

 “Not a—you’re fucking kidding me. You flirted with that wanker right in front of me! Then you had the nerve to let him touch you.”

 “Nick, he touched my back. Why is it such a big deal? You know I’m yours. you knew I was leaving with one man and one man alone.”

 You’d managed to put the bottles down on the bedside table in the bedroom before Nick was up against your back, pressing you into the floor to ceiling window. In seconds he’d spun you around so you could see the fury in his eyes.

 “You,” you finished in your seductive voice.

 Nick held you firmly at the waist with one hand while the other cupped your jaw holding your head in place. Using one of your hands, you brought it up his back, slowly going over each dip and rise that he’d worked so hard for in the gym and his Ji-Jitsu training. When your hand reached the nape of his neck, you sunk it into his loose curls, the curls you loved to entangle your fingers in every chance you got.

 “I’ve told you time and time again,” Nick began bringing the hand that was at your waist up your back to your neck. He then roughly pulled, making your head angle back enough to give him your undivided attention.

 “Mmm.”

 “You belong to me. I own every glance, every whisper, every smile, every kiss.” As he spoke every word, his voice dropped several octaves on each of them while he invaded the space between you.

 “I am the only man who can touch you.”

 You felt him cup your sex, and you had no idea when he’d moved his hand from your jaw. A small, breathy gasp escaped your throat. It was like he was proving to you why.

 “I.” Nick circled your silk-covered clit with one of his fingers. “Own.” He traced a zig-zag along your swollen bud. “This.” A firm pinch followed, making you shriek out, throwing your head back even more.

 “Fuck,” you whispered.

“Oh, princess. If that’s what you want. You’re going to have to work for it,” Nick teased before he bit your bottom lip, pulling back with it clutched between his teeth. The sting of pain was dull, but it was present.

 Nick walked from you around to his side of the bed. You noticed then he held one of the bottles of wine in his hand. You watched him open the bottom drawer to pull out a video camera, specifically one you’d gotten him for Christmas because of his interest in photography and filming. With the camera in hand with the bottle, he walked to the baroque style chair in the corner of the room behind the door and dragged it to the center of the room. Before Nick sat, he kicked off his loafers, sending them half under the bench that resided at the foot of your king-sized bed.

 Once he was seated with his long legs spread wide enough for you to fit, he easily opened the bottle and pulled the cork free with his teeth. The soft ‘thunk’ sound echoed in the quiet room. He then brought the bottle to his lips and guzzled from it, allowing some to dribble down his bearded chin to his partly exposed neck. Fuck, you thought, getting lost in the glisten of the wine on his toffee skin. His eyes landed on you, and the familiar butterflies fluttered in your gut. The man was downright sinfully gorgeous. A smirk flashed across his lips, and you knew he knew it. That was the deadliest combination.

 “Gonna stand there all night?”

 Scoffing, you grabbed the other bottle and did as he’d done with the one he was raising to his lips again. Spitting out the cork, it landed on the bed before you walked closer to him. after taking a swig of the rosé, you sucked your bottom lip.

 “What else should I be doing?”

 “I think you owe me an apology, princess,” Nick said.

 You couldn’t help but smile.

 “Did I hurt baby’s feelings?”

 The smile he wore instantly slipped, and he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his thighs. The look on his face was a serious one, and his eyes said he was a sliver from his asshole side.

 “I wouldn’t tease me right now, Y/N.”

 You took another gulp from the bottle and approached him as if he were a predator. He might as well have been, especially seeing the mood he was in. you knew flirting in front of him was a dangerous thing to do. You’d long known about his jealous tendencies and knew how he felt about you and other men. Nevertheless, you persisted. It was purposely done.

 Usually, Nick was a sweetheart. Whenever anyone ever saw him, they thought he was the sweetest, most gentle man. Their assumptions were absolutely correct, but his sweetness and gentleness had limits, and you knew how he would get if he saw you flirting with someone else. Nick leaned back in the chair, giving you space to swing a leg over to sit on him.

 “I’m sorry, baby,” you softly said, dragging out the last word.

 Nick scoffed, and you brought your lips to his, but he dipped his head back, evading your kiss.

 “I’m sorry,” he said.

 Quirking your brows, you looked at him quizzically.

 “I’m sorry you thought it would be that easy, and apologize meant words.”

 The butterflies took flight again, but this time they descended, making your clit throb. Nick took a sip from the bottle the whole while never taking his eyes off of you. Music played in the room, and just like that, you formulated your plan. Raising from his lap, you walked away to the darkened window. As you stood in front of it, you guzzled the wine, not measuring how much you swallowed.

 When you lowered the bottle, you turned to find not only Nick’s eyes on you but the lens of the camera. Staring into the lens, you finished the bottle then tossed it to the side. The ‘clunk’ it made upon impact with the carpeted wooden floor didn’t faze him one bit.

  🎶 The music that played sounded like the perfect choice for a striptease. You wondered if he planned this. That was when you decided to change the way this was going. You walked over to the sound system and changed the song. From the very beginning, you knew that he knew what the song was. This was working out so well, you thought.

 “I said, certified freak, seven days a week, wet-ass pussy, make that pull-out game weak.”

 You slid your hands along your body until you gently cupped your sex. Nick’s eyes went right where you wanted them. As you mouthed the next few lines, you made sure to lock eyes with him. Slowly, Nick skimmed his tongue along his lips, wetting them in the most erotic way. Closing your eyes, you pretended you were dancing for yourself, not holding anything back.

 When you got closer to him, you stepped between his legs then twirled for him until your ass poked in his face. That was when you dipped down low enough for your ass to rub against his crotch. You heard him groan against your ear, but before he could bring his hand to touch you, you stood, then walked behind him. You grabbed his hair and yanked his head back, so he looked in your eyes. You kissed his temple, then brought your lips to his ear.

 “I want you to park that big Mack truck, right in this little garage.”

 Nick scoffed, then groaned as he watched you come in front of him to drop your ass to his lap. You began grinding on him, giving him a preview of all that was for him and your expert level lapdance skills. When you began twerking on his lap, you felt his hand on your waist. He moved it to your stomach, pulling you back against him.

 “You think you’re cute, don’t you?”

 Glancing back at him with your lip clenched between your teeth, you leaned back a little more to lick his cheek before winking at him. You slid off his lap to kneel in front of him. Dropping your chest to the floor, you kept your ass perched in the air giving him one of the best views. You didn’t care that the hem of your dress was above your ass, showing off your thonged ass that you were sure was soaked. Peeking back at him, you knew he’d peeped it. His groan was a lot louder than before. You turned, remaining on your knees right on time to the lyrics.

 “I don’t wanna spit; I wanna gulp, I wanna gag, I wanna choke, I want you to touch that lil’ dangly thing, that swing in the back of my throat.”

 For emphasis, you caressed your face against his hardened delight that was barely hiding behind his pants. Nick then grabbed your hair, pulling your head back, so you looked at him. You couldn’t help but smile.

 “Pleased with yourself, huh.”

 He brought his bottle to your mouth, and on cue, you opened for him to pour some of the wine inside. Knowing your mouth was full, he didn’t stop. He poured so it spilled down your body life a cascading waterfall. When he released you, you wiped your mouth then sucked your finger into your mouth before slowly crawling away. You stopped for a few moments, then peeled off the dress you wore before throwing it back at him.

 Nick made it such an easy thing to catch the fabric mid-air before tossing it over his shoulder. He then leaned forward again, leaning his elbows on his thighs. Left in only your thong and bra, you used the floor to bounce on it a few times before you turned to him and roamed your hands over your body. The pleased look on his face only increased.

 You stood and then began doing the famous dance for the song showcasing your flexibility while playing up every exposed body part for his viewing pleasure. As you humped and pounded the floor, you glanced at him again. His expression was darkened and masked. You crawled back to him, knowing the end of the song was coming. Once between his legs, you roamed your hands up along his legs and thighs before coming to the buckle of his pants.

 Without words, you undid his pants then helped him pull them off. Nick gulped wine as he watched you and where your hands went. When you pulled off his boxer-briefs, his lengths flicked out then bobbed in the air. Locking eyes with him, you licked your lips.

 “Am I forgiven, baby?”

 Instead of answering, he just watched you. You scoffed and decided to kick things up a notch. You grabbed the bottle and took a mouthful of wine before you lowered your mouth onto his dick. Nick grunted, no doubt from the shock of the cold wine against his searing skin. Hearing him gulp, you knew he wouldn’t be holding out much longer. You slurped the liquid that was in your mouth, knowing the vibration from it would feel divine. Nick dropped his head back and released a long groan.

 You slowly pleased him, making sure to tease the shit out of him. He may have wanted you to apologize, and you’d give it to him because it was slightly fucked up what you did, but there was no way this would be easy for him.

 “Fuck!”

 It was strangled, and in seconds, his hand was on top of your head, holding you from going any further. Your throat was his weakness. You opened it up and lodged the last of his arousal right where he was trying to prevent you from getting.

 “Holy--.”

 The sudden tightness of your throat around him cut the ending of the word off. You shook your head, giving him the full feel of where he was and letting him know just how you planned on fucking with him. When his eyes met yours, you knew he’d picked up on your plan. Nick pulled you up and pulled you down on his lap. As you straddled him, his cock rested persistently against your ass, teasing you. You brought your lips to his, and again, he evaded your kiss. You were getting annoyed with the bullshit now. Before you could voice your annoyance, Nick pushed you back but caught you before you fell to the floor. He then grabbed your thigh and pulled them to his face. Before you knew it, your thighs were spread with his face buried between your legs.

 “Oh, fuck!”

 He was in no mood for slow or teasing. It was evident with the way he feasted. Nick sucked your clit into his mouth, and that was when your hands dropped to the floor to brace yourself. Nick’s arm around your waist held you firm while his other hand kept one of your thighs right where he wanted it.

 Whimper after whimper escaped your lips, and with every one he used it as fuel to show you who was in control right now. You may have thought it was you, but Nick was good at taking all he allowed away. His tongue flicked against your flesh, and your body shook, making him hold you tighter. You trusted him implicitly and knew he’d never hurt you in any way you weren’t okay with.

 When Nick slurped against you, you were done for.

 “Fuck, I’m gonna come, baby.”

 Just like that, Nick stood and brought you to the bed. He then tossed you onto it just before your orgasm gripped you. Groaning from frustration, you looked at him. You were in time to see him peel his shirt from his body. Once free of it, he dropped his pants, leaving him entirely bare before you. Sinking your teeth into your bottom lip, you spread your legs, making sure he saw just how badly you wanted him—how much you were sorry.

 Nick reached for you, gripped the waist of your thong, and pulled. It took a few moments to realize he wasn’t trying to free you from the silk that bound the part of you he wanted to ravish. Instead, he was bringing you to him. Once you were before him, he used that beautiful cock of his to slap your clit.

 You arched your back and felt the familiar feeling that signaled an oncoming orgasm. He did it again and again, but when you were right at the precipice of your release, Nick stopped. Glaring at him, you saw his mischievous smirk.

 “This won’t be easy, princess.”

 You groaned loudly while rolling your eyes.

 “So, this will be hard?” Nick quirked his brow while stroking his length.

 “Oh, it’s already hard, princess. Can’t you tell?”

 “How can I? You won’t give it to me.”

 “Beg for it.”

 He knew you hated begging.

 “Nick,” you warned.

 “Y/N.”

 Narrowing your eyes, you showcased that stubbornness he hated but loved to fuck out of you.

 “Be careful, princess. I’m sure you want to walk tomorrow.”

 He made a good point, and you knew he was good for it. Biting back the sarcastic remark you thought of, you took a breath.

 “Fuck me, baby.”

 He smiled.

 “Not good enough.”

 Dropping your hand between your legs, you decided to do what he could not resist. Nick watched you play with yourself for a few moments before he slapped your hand away while shaking his head.

 “I hope that was worth it, princess.”

  🎶 Once the words were out, you began to say something, but he slammed into you using the slickness of your desire to aid the glide of his thick, throbbing member. Once fully sheathed, he didn’t wait or allow you to adjust. Instead, he pulled back and did the action again and again. Once nestled in your tightness, Nick rotated his hips, sending your back off the mattress. He then pulled you closer to the edge of the bed and quickly thrust in and out of you. Each move he made, the sounds your combined bodies made echoed in the room. The instrumental version of Wicked Games made for the perfect background sound as Nick worked your body like a professional maestro.

 Everything he did only aided you on your quest for a release. His thrusts were deep and powerful. His intention was clear, and you knew tomorrow would have you feeling the delicious ache of him. You gasped when he held you against his body and jackhammered into you, sending him so deep you almost couldn’t bear it.

 “Fuck, Nick!”

 He simply groaned, then lifted you bringing you to the windows of your bedroom. Pressing you against the window, he fucked you there, taking the time and care to nudge that bundle if nerved deep within you that promised an intergalactic release.

 “Yes, baby, fuck me! Right there!”

 Your panting melded with his that began to rival how loud you were.

 “Oh, fu--!”

 Nick released your leg, allowing you to put it on the floor. The change of angle was what pushed you over the edge. You screamed as the electric feeling coursed through you making your limbs tense up and spasm as if you’d stuck your finger into an electrical socket. Even through the orgasm, you knew this was not the intergalactic one Nick’s thrusts promised.

 Without knowing how you felt the cold glass press to your cheek. Your reflection caught your eye, and it was then you realized he’d turned you and was now fucking you into oblivion using all the power his muscular body held.

 “Mmmm. Who do you belong to, princess?”

 Your throat was dry. Words would be difficult. Instead, you panted, hoping he understood. When he forcefully flicked his hips forward, making your body jerk and you scream out, you knew he didn’t understand.

 “Who!?”

 “You.” It was raspy and barely coherent. You gasped, feeling him deliver another bruising blow.

 “Who’s pussy is this?”

 “Yours.” A whisper.

 “Who fucks you so right!?”

 He must have thought you needed coaxing to answer because his hand snaked between your legs to roll your clit between his fingers. Your body jerked, then softly shook. Your panting prohibited any speech.

 “Who!?”

 You weren’t trying to be disobedient. You simply couldn’t muster speech. You knew he didn’t care and would tell you to “dig deep.” When you’d remained silent for too long, you felt his large thumb slip into what was considered a taboo spot, but between you, it was far from taboo.

 You flung your head back and instantly began shaking more violently.

 “Tell me before I put this thick dick right where you want it,” Nick warned.

 “Y—yo—you do. You fu—fuck me so fu—cking good!”

 He bent over your back and looked at you. “Damn right, I do.”

 Nick then plowed into you with reckless abandon as his thumb worked your forbidden hole and his other hand rolled your clit. This was what was promised, and you chased after it with everything you had left.

 “Fuck, Y/N, you feel too fucking good! Mmm, this pussy was meant for me. You were meant for me.”

 Nick thrust once, then twice, and a third before his hips began to stagger, delivering sloppy but precise thrusts. In seconds he hit your spot so right that the floodgates opened, and it was over. You shot off like a rocket into the sky, then past earth into space, and finally an entirely different galaxy.

 “Fuuuuuuuuck!”

 Your scream was so loud your ears began to ring, and Nick’s pants and moans became inaudible. The only indication you knew that he’d come was how far he was trying to bury himself inside of you and the fulfilling feeling of being so full you could burst. You remained where you were, shaking, convulsing, and unable to move. When you felt soft sheets underneath you, you realized once again; Nick had carried you to the bed.

 You had no energy, your body felt like jello, but you found a way to turn to face him. He was already watching you with sweat rolling down his face and his wet hair in a bevy of curls. You loved this view. The moments after your coital escapades were always the time where you felt like you could see all the way to his soul.

 “I’m sorry,” you whispered, ignoring the soreness you felt there.

 Nick brought his lips to yours and gently kissed you, slowly licking and sucking on them.

 “I love you, Y/N.”

 Your heart melted.

 “But don’t ever forget, I’ll fuck you into next week until you don’t know your ABCs from your 123s,” he finished.

 Your pussy flooded. He was playing with fire cause that didn’t sound like a warning at all. As a matter of fact, it sounded like a challenge. Walking was overrated.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TagList:

@chaneajoyyy​ @caramara3​ @night-of-the-living-shred​ @mauvecherie​ @areubeingserved​ @queenoftheworldisdead​ @ramp-it-up​ @i-just-like-fanfics​ @give-me-a-million-dollars-pls​ @wondersofdreaming​ @koko-michelle

[lilikags]

ೃ‧₊› a b o u t  t h i s  p o s t° ➮ Pairing: Miya Atsumu x reader ➮ Oneshot ➮ Tags: fluff ➮ Word Count: 2182

A/N: This is for @serowotonin​! [for Luna’s Valentines Day collab] Ik I said I was doing Atsumu bc “I was bored” but I always say “imagine being bored” and truly, I haven’t been bored for so long. I forgot that this was for the collab for a fat moment then when you saw the preview I was like, “Wait- no- it’s a surprise.” 

Premise: You and Atsumu are cleaning out the apartment, when you find a few letters you thought you would never see again… 

“Oi, (y/n), look at what I found,” you heard Atsumu say, leaning over the contents of a drawer he had been sifting through. 

“What?” you walked over to see what he had found. The two of you were cleaning out the apartment, as you were going to be moving out soon. Atsumu had a habit of keeping things that connected him to an important memory of his, unless he wanted to forget it- and this was one of them. You didn’t know he kept them- actually, it did make sense of him to, but you had simply forgotten about it and you somehow expected the same for him. You looked down to see what he had in his hands, and your face literally went emotionless as you saw the letter in his hands. 

You really didn’t mind the letters, for the most part. Actually, they held dear to you. However, that first one… you were grateful for it, but you also remembered just how bad you wanted to buy a grave space and bury it for eternity back then... 

Miya Atsumu.

This was a dare. This is a love letter. For Valentines. Happy valentines day. If you have extra chocolate, send me some. 

Sincerest thanks, (y/n). 

Atsumu usually threw away the letters he received every Valentines. It wasn’t that he was trying to be rude; it was just that there were too many letters for him to read (and reply to), so he usually just threw them out. Osamu often teased him for this; he boasted that he at least read his letters.

“Oi, ‘Samu, look at this one,” Atsumu called out to his brother. 

“What?” Osamu looked at him, with a face of disbelief. “Yer actually lookin’ at them?”

“Nah, not really, but this one’s hilarious,” Atsumu laughed. 

“Okay, not funny, keep yer lame humor to yourself.” 

----------------

“(y/n), truth or dare,” (b/f/n) asked. 

You smiled, “Dare.” 

“Hmmm… alright, send a love letter to Miya Atsumu- it has to be at least one line long.”

“I’m- okay then.” 

You brought out a piece of paper, wrote the first things that came to mind, and once you reached one line, you stopped. You folded the paper and grabbed whatever envelope you could find and sealed it with tape. The dare required actually giving the letter, much to your dismay, but it wasn’t like you could back down from a dare. After all, it was (b/f/n), and the nonstop teasing would definitely occur if you failed to complete the dare. 

Dearest (y/n), 

I did in fact receive your rather interesting letter, and I have decided to bring you some chocolate as you wished. I wish you, as well, a very happy valentine’s day this year.

Most sincerely, Atsumu. 

Atsumu was intrigued enough to write a reply; in fact, he decided to write in the most formal way possible. He knew from the letter that you were either a tsundere or someone who was actually dared to do so, and decided that it would be fun entertainment for the both of you. 

When you received the letter, you were surprised to see a reply. It was known he didn’t send out replies, yet you had received one. As you read it, you felt a need to reply; you’d simply feel bad if you didn’t. However, what was there to talk about? How the chocolates were good? He had stuck it on your first period desk, out in the open. And you also sincerely wondered what was with the overly formal tone. You do remember writing the most shitty letter you’ve ever written to him, and that volleyball-obsessed dude just writes something formal to you? Baffles the mind.

Well, then, if he was going to reply, you would too. 

Miya Atsumu,

Thanks for the chocolate- your fans make pretty good chocolate, I have to say. Bet I could make better chocolate than ya, ‘cause all ya focus on is just volleyball. Anyways, what was with the overly formal tone- ya like me or somethin’? Would be funny if ya did and I turned ya down. XD  

(y/n) 

You never really thought of Miya Atsumu, but this really sparked your interest. It was amusing, his reactions. It was definitely something you didn’t expect- you actually didn’t expect a reply at all. The reply you received was definitely out of the ordinary as well, one you never thought a hotshot volleyball player would write. It seemed he was interested in you in some ways- and you as well. 

(y/n),

Pfffft, you think I might like ya? I just thought yer letter was interestin’, that’s all. Ya really think I can’t make chocolate? Bet I could make better chocolate than ya, I’ll show you. I make you chocolate myself and we’ll see how it tastes. Just you watch, I’ll make ya say I make the best chocolate ever! 

Atsumu. 

You saw that in your shoe locker the next morning- and everyone saw it. You were beginning to regret actually replying to him, but there was no backing out now. (b/f/n) really hit the goal here, for her. People were probably talking about it. It’s always some event that involves romance that catches everyone’s eye. And since it was just after valentine’s, everyone would automatically assume it was a love letter. In reality, it was simply a little bit of playful banter. 

You wondered if people actually knew who it was. You hoped not; it would gather way too much attention for your liking. You’d have an entire fanclub after you, and it was definitely (b/f/n)’s fault that you got into this entire mess. You had absolutely no idea if anyone saw him slip that into your shoe locker, since it had probably been there for a good hour or so before you and most of the other students got there. In any case, there was nothing you could do about people knowing things they already know, so you headed onto class. It was exam week, and you sighed; it would be a long day. 

When you arrived at homeroom, you were not-so-pleasantly surprised with what you found at your desk. You just wanted a quiet day; go to school, take the tests, and get out so you could relax at home. But no, you just had to see this and you knew there was a thing called rumors you had to deal with. Well, you could just be like “whatever” and not care, but you definitely knew who’d be after you, for real. Atsumu’s fanbase was quite scary, and definitely large- a group of people one would regret messing with. 

“Ugh- what am I going to do with this chocolate now, he gave me a lot yesterday…” 

“(y/n)! Oiiii, you got chocolate?! From who from who-”

“(b/f/n), if you say a word, you are going to be dead to me.”

“...” she looked away, but then turned to you again and whispered in your ear. “So, Miya Atsumu, who has a fanbase, likes you.” 

“I’m- no-”

“But what I’m seeing says otherwise?”

“Ugh, you’re coming to my house and you are going to pay for that dare.” 

“Oh ho ho, seems like I started something…” “Bet you did.”

Pisshead Atsumu

LMAO bet ya didn’t make the chocolate, yer terrible at lying <///3 seen this chocolate before. And like wtf you put a box of chocolate on my desk with YOUR NAME on it. Ya know that people will do a thing called assuming things, right? Smh, think before you act. Anyways, I’m counting on ya to fix up this mess.

(y/n)

When you finished class, the first thing you did was write the note. You were absolutely paranoid with this mess, and you were going to have Atsumu fix it. Yes, you did technically initiate contact first, but that was (b/f/n)’s fault and this could’ve avoided this if he hadn’t pulled off a whole stunt. 

It was already around 6 when he saw the note. A small smirk filled his expression, he was so sure that he would be able to get a good reaction out of (y/n). It was written on scrap paper, the back of a phys. ed worksheet. You wrote it in a rush, very obviously. That wasn’t really what caught his attention though; he was puzzled as to how he would fix this. Tell his fans to fuck off? Osamu would tease him for eternity.

“Oi, what’cha starin’ at?” he heard Osamu nag. “Mom’s waitin’ for us for dinner.”

“Hey, ‘Samu…  ya know how to fix this?” 

“... ARE YOU AN IDIOT- YOU ARE AN IDIOT.”

“I AM NOT! YOU ARE THE IDIOT HERE!” 

“SAYS THE ONE WHO GOT INTO A MESS LIKE THIS!” 

“Oi, ya shouldn’t be fightin’ at this hour,” the two heard Kita say, as he gave them a certain look. “... ‘m sorry…” the twins apologized.

Even after a fulfilling dinner made by their mother and a nice, hot shower, Atsumu still couldn’t think of a solution. Osamu almost snitched on him, but he decided that there was enough on their mom’s plate of problems at the moment. 

“What if ya said you were dating?” Osamu offered. 

“HAH?! ARE YA INSANE?!” Atsumu yelled at him.

“That would explain what happened at valentine’s.” 

“But there’s nothin’ between us-”

“Yer fanclub wouldn’t really believe anythin’ else.”

“Yeah…” 

(y/n),

Can we meet when practice ends at 6 on Thursday?

M. Atsumu.

“... I’m- Is he just going to apologize then run away? Tch.” you sighed. You had the idea that Miya Atsumu was overconfident and carefree, but not to this extent. The least he could do was fix this- he had power over his fandom and what people said about him, unlike you. You had to go, it wasn’t like you really had much of a choice if you wanted to talk it out and fix it. 

“Hey, (y/n) are you and Atsumu dating?” one of your classmates asked, and a bunch of others hovered around the table, waiting to hear a response. (b/f/n) had told you rumors had spread around the entire school; you figured that would’ve happened. Any topic related to the twins spread like wildfire, especially the blonde-haired one. 

“... Can you not try to pry into my private life?” you replied, which you instantly realized was exactly a wrong answer to give. This implied that you were in fact dating Atsumu secretly, and you just made your life 10x worse. You figured you should just tell everyone what had happened, then the blame would be on (b/f/n)- it should preferably be placed on Atsumu, since he started it, really. 

When you met him at 6pm, you expected no contribution from him. Instead, you were met with a solid plan for something you weren’t really happy about, but it seemed the easiest to convince the public of a story they put out. 

“(y/n)... let’s tell them that we’re dating.”

“Hmm… well, they already think that…”

“I’m sorry… I wasn’t thinking…” “It’s fine. All we can do is move forward, I guess.”

“Yeah… ‘Samu gave me this solution; it’s all I have, I’m sorry if it’s-”

“It’s fine. Let’s go through with it. Just protect me from the crazy fangirls; that’s all I want.”

“Ya.” 

“And we’ll need to put together a coherent story; what’s yer number?” 

“Ahaha, seriously, maybe (b/f/n)’s a prophet. She told me that she was aiming for somethin’ to happen between us,” you commented, remembering what happened years and years ago. 

“Ya were just so unnecessarily worried about the fangirls,” Atsumu mentioned. 

“Oi! Yer fangirls were hella scary back then…” 

That night, you stayed up coming up with a story, which ended with the two of you breaking up so that you could go on your separate ways again. However, the story didn’t last too long, as (b/f/n)’s parent’s investigations went a little too far and spread the truth a little too much. (b/f/n) is one thing, but you had almost forgotten her parents were another, seriously. They’d been a little busy over the last few years, thus the lack of investigations of local drama, but they had been doing so for decades, what could you expect from them? 

Nothing was Atsumu’s fault to the fanclub, unless he seriously convinced them that it was. You were guilty until proven innocent. Unbeknownst to you until after, he gave them a whole (to be honest, not-so-great) speech on how he kind of went too far with the joke, but also placed the blame on everyone else for assuming things. People were absolutely ridiculous; their ideas and their insane imagination should learn that the left side of the brain exists too. 

“Funny how we met again after college, after all that time.”

“Ya… a real wonder” 

Another A/N: OMG THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING FOR��‘TSUMU FORGIVE ME IF I WROTE HIM LIKE, WRONG IN THIS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

『••✎••』 Extra Info * ˚ ✦ ⇢ If you would like to read some of my other works, find them here! * ˚ ✦ ⇢ Taglist: @serowotonin​ @luna-la-ley​ // send me an ask if you would like to be added!

[zeppelin-and-unicorns]

Black Peonies preview

A/N: This is the first chapter of the J/H soulmate AU fanfic I’ve been working on for a really long time. I do not plan on posting it on AO3 or ff.net for now, because I have yet to finish writing the last couple of chapters.

That being said, I hope you enjoy this sneak peek.

Trigger Warning: Explicit child abuse

Chapter one:

January, 1970

Steven Hyde walked through the dark streets of Point Place alone. Mr. Forman’s brother from Chicago got hurt, and the whole Forman clan went to see him for the weekend, which means that Hyde had nowhere to go.

He stayed with Kelso and Donna for a big chunk of the day, but Bob doesn’t like when Donna has boys over after it was dark out, so he and Kelso had to take off.

He walked Kelso to his home, because Hyde was not in a hurry to get to his own house. It was a Saturday, and Edna tends to go a little crazy on Saturdays, that’s why he would often sleep over at the Forman’s.

He was lucky Bob and Midge made them snacks too, because Edna rarely buys any food for the weekends. She tends to spend the little money they have on booze and drugs.

He spent as much time as possible walking around, trying to avoid going home to Edna, but there wasn’t much he could do, it was very cold outside, and he didn’t have a nice jacket to keep him warm, he needed to go home. It was trashy, but at least there was heat. He hoped Edna would be passed out by now, but he doubted, it was still early.

The minute he reached his block, he sighed. He could already hear the sounds of beer bottles clinking and the voices of his mom’s stoner friends, she definitely was not asleep, crap.

Someone threw a beer bottle at his direction, and the glass shattered all over the shitty pavement. He glanced at the direction the bottle came from, and saw his mother’s laughing figure sitting on the porch. Fucking fantastic.

“Home already, kiddo?” She asked, slurring with her words and blowing the smoke from the cigarette in her hand.

“It’s cold” He shrugged, and tried to get inside the house before his mother would start with her usual drunken ramblings, that usually ended up with her blaming him for her shitty life.

His mother grabbed his arm to stop him and he sighed in frustration.

“You couldn’t have stayed with your friend today?” She asked bitterly

“He’s outta town with his folks” He answered, hoping she would drop it and let him go to his room.

“It wasn’t enough for you to ruin my career, now you have to ruin my weekend too?” She said, puffing out another cloud of smoke

“Believe me, I wouldn’t be here if I had somewhere else to go” Hyde answered 

“Aren’t you a smartass?” Edna taunted him, and laughed slyly.

“I want to go inside, it’s cold” Hyde said simply, if he learned something from all of his 11 miserable years with Edna, is that there was no use in arguing with her.

“I know something that will warm you up in a second” She slurred out and laughed, forcefully grabbing his right hand on her bony fingers and putting out her cigarette on his skin.

He felt his skin burning and tried to pull his hand off her tight grip, the pain brought tears into his eyes and it was almost unbearable. But she held on tighter, pressing the burnt stub onto his skin as she laughed.

"Tears?" Edna mocked at the sight of Hyde's teary eyes "Aren't you supposed to be a tough guy?"

He held himself back. He wanted to tell her to fuck off so badly, but he knew better. If he did, he would have to spend the night wandering the streets, and he wasn't in the mood to freeze to death.

She flicked the bud onto the snow, and finally let go of his hand. The pain didn't go away though, in fact, it got worse. He thanked a God he wasn't so sure he believed in for making Wisconsin winters so cold. He would be able to hide the burn by wearing gloves and ease the pain by shoving his hand onto the snow that probably accumulated by his bedroom's dingy window.

Hyde glanced one last time at his stoned and drunk pathetic excuse of a mother and headed inside the house, holding his right hand on his left one.

Sometimes he wished the soulmate thing wasn't real. He doesn't like the thought of an innocent girl suffering all the pain his mother puts him through.

But he knew better, the universe never cared about his wishes, otherwise he would have a different mother. He just hoped that the girl who had the bad luck of being his soulmate had a strong support system or whatever, because his shitty reality isn't changing anytime soon.

Meanwhile, in Point Place's community theater…

10 year old Jackie anxiously tried to peek through the closed blinds, today was probably one of the most exciting days of her life, she was about to play on her first piano recital ever! She was trying her hardest to not be nervous, because she’s a Burkhart, and Burkhart’s excel on absolutely everything they do – according to her mother. She practiced every day for hours, she wanted to be perfect, because both of her parents promised they’d watch her play today.

“Miss Burkhart, it’s almost time, are you ready?”

“Yes I am, Mrs. Crawford! I have my sheet here with me – even though I don’t need it, just as a precaution” Jackie said excitedly, and her music teacher smiled

“You’re going to do great, Jackie” She said with a small smile “Go wait over there, you’re up next” 

Jackie nodded and went to wait where her teacher indicated. Her heart was beating so fast, and she couldn’t keep the smile off her face. She couldn’t wait to be praised by her parents.

They already missed her dance recital, and neither of them were there when she won the trophy for “Prettiest Ballerina”, but they promised they would attend her piano recital, that’s why she decided she would play one of the hardest songs, so she could impress them.

She knew none of her colleagues had the ability to play this song; most of them were playing “Fur Elise” or “Ode to Joy”. She wanted to be the best, so she chose “Clair de Lune” by Debussy, one of her father’s favorites songs. He likes to listen to it when he’s smoking his cigars, so she made sure to learn just to make him proud.

When she heard Mrs. Crawford calling her name, she’d put on her stage smile, the one her mother taught her so long ago. When she entered the stage, she glanced at the audience, trying to find the familiar faces of her parents. She didn’t see either of them, and she had to repress the urge to cry.

They bailed on her, again. They promised they would make it!

She took a deep breath and saw Martina’s familiar face. She was giving her a sad smile, and Jackie sighed. She likes Martina, but she would never fill the hole left by her mother. It’s not like Martina wants to be there anyways, she only went because she’s paid to do so.

Jackie quickly forced a smile and went to sit at the piano bench. If her parents didn’t want to be there, that’s their loss. There was a good amount of LOPP’s mothers there, she hoped they would tell her mother later how she played beautifully, and her mother better feel bad.

She stretched her fingers the way Mrs. Crawford taught her, and placed the music sheet on its proper place. The second her fingers touched the piano keys, she felt herself relaxing a bit, and when she started to play, she genuinely smiled. The first couple of minutes of the song went smoothly, some people even clapped when she mastered the transition from the slow part of the song to the slightly faster one.

Then she stopped playing, and not because the song was over.

Out of nowhere, she felt a blinding pain on her hand. She whimpered in pain and held her right hand with her left one, tears involuntarily falling from her eyes.

Mrs. Crawford quickly ran to see what was going on with her best student, and she sighed when she saw a black peony forming on the girl’s hand. 

“It’s burning, Mrs. Crawford” Jackie cried, and the older woman placed her hand on her shoulder.

“I know honey, you know what that means, right?” She said, and Jackie nodded.

That means that her soulmate was hurting. Again.

Last week Jackie got a new flower on her shoulder, and the week before that, she felt like someone was slapping her on her face.

Thank God that bruises on the face don’t leave flower marks, otherwise people would see her as a freak, because she feels like she’s being slapped or punched on at least once a week.

Mrs. Crawford guided her out of the stage, and made her sit on a small bench near the dressing rooms. Jackie carefully rubbed her hand, the pain was starting to subside a little, the black peony marking the exact place where it was hurting.

“Do you want to go back and start again, Jackie?” The woman gently asked, and Jackie shook her head.

All she wanted to do was go back home and pray for her soulmate to get the help he needs. She doesn’t know why he gets hurt so often, but she wanted it to stop. For both of their sakes.

[iridescentides]

i watched the ep twice bc i didnt take notes the first time BUT. hsmtmts 2.04 thoughts under the cut

gina first. my favorite part of the episode was when she admitted that she feels out of place living in someone else’s house and that she wanted a bigger part in the play. i was SO worried they were gonna just let her happily sideline herself in a “yay she learned her lesson about not being the center of attention” kind of way bc i would not be able to handle that two seasons in a row. let her be angry!!! she has a lot to be upset about

the gina/carlos conflict was awful bc theyre making carlos unreasonably annoying this season. last season he was nice, he was enthusiastic, not competitive and just rooting for other people. idk why they needed to flip him so drastically to being spoiled, rich, selfish, pushy, and bitchy. and on top of that i have not been vibing with the pieces of dialogue theyve been giving him this season just to score woke points. its so unbearably obvious that even though hes a brown gay character, he was written by a white gay person who thought, on some level, that he was giving the gen z kids the #hashtag representation they wanted. his delivery of every line that screams “remember, im mexican” is so awkward, it doesnt land well, and im begging them to stop. they want so badly to commodify his character and parade him around as a “look how diverse our show is!” thing and im so so sick of it bc you can tell, with all the surface-level pieces of dialogue, that they dont actually care at all

(”look around, theres not a lot of me at this school” we GET it, this show wants to be glee so bad)

im honestly starting to slowly ship rina less and less. in season one i loved seeing someone make gina happy, especially since she had no friends before opening up to ricky. but now its just a whole mess and i wish she would love herself a lil more to realize that its not worth all this stress. he made a choice and no amount of conflicted moments of eye contact is going to fully take that back. im not necessarily against love triangle plots, but i HATE the whole “women wait around hopefully while male character, whose decisions have already hurt multiple people, makes up his mind” bullshit

that being said, gina handled the situation like a CHAMP, im dying over how quickly she was able to mask her pain and make the joke about the twix bar. im love her

we were absolutely ROBBED of an ej/big red performance this episode!!! i am at my LIMIT we better get gaston next week or i will riot

on the ej train, him not getting into duke was extremely predictable. we all kinda saw that coming and knew that would be his main point of growth this season. im glad they didnt wait super long to do it. now please @ writers i am BEGGING you to give my man more screen time than one scene per episode

its very odd that they keep making mr mazzara have emotionally tough conversations with the students. i will do a parallel gifset of those once the season ends. i liked his convo with ej for the most part, but he really didnt have to beat him over the head with the “youre an emotionless robot” thing again. its clear ej is gonna throw himself into av club or whatever (even though at the end of last season that was supposed to be big red?) and discover that he has a lot going for him. because he does, he literally has everything going for him, thats why they had to make his “problem” not knowing himself. bisexual ej caswell ftw

i love the parallels between ej and nini this episode? i think since the beginning ive felt that there was a lot about them under the surface that was similar. it was interesting seeing ej tell nini about duke first, instead of the obvious choice of ashlyn. i wouldve loved to see how that scene wouldve gone with ricky, gina, carlos, or big red though bc each reaction and attempt at comforting him wouldve been so different. i didnt love that nini had to be pulled away from the conversation, but im glad they can still talk to each other after everything that went down. and i love the juxtaposition of ej’s convo with mazzara directly following nini’s convo with miss jenn bc theyre essentially the same.

speaking of, i loved miss jenn in this episode. her stories are always so funny, but i loved seeing her care so much for nini and guide her, like a teacher. i loved how she pointed out that everyone who loves nini just wants her to be happy

im glad nini is leaving yac bc there was no good way to keep that up honestly. but im pretty annoyed that they were so obvious about it? like, they immediately made it the worst place in the world without exploring it very much. the place is super unrealistic, ive never been to drama school but im sure it wouldnt be like that. no creative arts place for KIDS would be so impossibly limiting. plus the weird bluish coloring in comparison to the nice warm tones of the rest of the show was, again, a dead giveaway. why send her to the school at all if it wasnt even gonna matter?

even though im glad nini left yac, im NOT looking forward to the way miss jenn is about to bend over backwards to put her in the play somehow. she plays obvious favorites and im so annoyed

(sidenote: nini just? decided to leave yac without consulting her parents??? ummm)

granted is a very good song, one of my faves so far

ricky deciding to tell nini he wants her to stay was stupid. what did he think that would accomplish? who in their right mind would drop out of a good school for you?

i loved when nini said yac was missing something, and miss jenn said “ricky” and nini said “you.” that was so so sweet and cute

i think the kourtney/howie thing is gonna grow on me. i hate amatonormativity so im not a big fan of them introducing a whole ass character exclusively so kourtney can have a love interest, but i loved the gesture he made of bringing her the pizzas and her flashcards. i feel like kourtneys love language is acts of service, and she was literally this meme when he did that for her:

i liked seeing ashlyn try to be there emotionally for gina! i want more of them together

overall this episode was okay. not enough songs, and i wish they were spreading out the emotional conversations through the season instead of packing them all into literally one episode, but what we did get was pretty good.

after watching the preview i see that next weeks episode is gonna be about carlos’s party, and i love party episodes. BUT i hope that after that ep we finally get an advancement on the north high stuff! i dont give too many fucks about lily, but i wanna see my son asher angel

[mcfreakin-bxtch]

Rain and Sun

Geralt of Rivia x Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Mild angst, Mentions of violence, Mentions of smut but no detailed tango

Word Count: 2.4k

Requested by: @crazyzivadiva​ 

Prompts: #9 “I want to stop loving you but I can’t and it’s fucking destroying me.” - “I never meant for any of this to happen.”

#54 “Sometimes I wonder if I’m good enough.”

A/N: I’m getting there, only two more requests to go (finally)! Geralt may seem a little ooc in this one and I love my baby Yen (and there’s no Ciri in this one). I’m hoping maybe before I post the other two I can get another preview of Be Yours posted this Wednesday since I’ve been teasing this story for months now. 

Masterlist // Pedro Pascal Masterlist

Geralt remembers when he first laid eyes on her. His healer. 

He didn’t think much of her at first. She certainly was not Yennefer by any means, but she was different, and that suited him just fine. Besides, when he first met her, he had venom coursing through his veins. 

“Not surprising to find these marks on you, Witcher.” She said, trying to distract him he thought as she worked on him. 

“And I’m sure I’ll be seeing you again with more littered around these ones,” she teased. 

He didn’t respond. Instead, he hissed in pain as she dug the sharp edge of her knife into his arm, watching as the puss and venom seeped from him. 

“Sorry,” she apologized. “But you’re going to live another day… what is your name by the way?”

Geralt knew that she immediately recognized him as soon as he asked for her help. 

“Geralt.” He grunted out. 

She nodded, smiling at him. “Well Geralt. I’m Y/N.”

He only stayed for three days. Y/N was nothing but compliant, attending to him only when required. He also appreciated the fact that she left him alone, let him come to her. 

“Safe travels, Witcher,” she bid. He noted that despite how chipper she made it sound, there was a hint of disappointment. 

“Thank you.” He grunted. 

She smiled shyly, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. A part of Geralt wanted to say more to her, she did save his life after all. 

He didn’t think he’d ever cross paths with her again.

-

The second time the Witcher ran into his healer, he was unharmed and Jaskier was hanging to him by the hip. 

Y/N didn’t try to hide her grin when she saw him walk through her village. She stood by a lake, a bucket of water in her arms. She looked just about the same as he left her, just a moon ago. 

“Ooooh you know her,” Jaskier sang. “And who may she be, Geralt?”

Geralt rolled his eyes. “Just a healer,” he muttered. 

Still, even as he said this he did not take his eyes off her. He watched her bring the bucket to her home, a small cottage just near the stands of the markets through her village. 

“Well do I get to meet her?” 

Geralt was about to say no, to leave her alone as he intended to do. But her voice called out to him, and he cursed lowly under his breath when Jaskier wiggled his eyebrows playfully at him before turning to the healer. 

“Didn’t think I’d see you around these parts again,” Y/N jested. 

“Oh our Witcher likes to revisit… certain places with certain… interesting people.”

Geralt flinched inwardly at Jaskier’s failed attempt to embarrass him. 

Y/N scrunched her eyebrows in confusion but smiled nonetheless. 

“Passing through,” Geralt said before she opened her mouth to speak. “And this is Jaskier. A bard.”

She made a small noise of affirmation and nodded, turning to Jaskier. 

“A bard huh? Geralt doesn’t seem the type to carry those around.”

He couldn’t help himself, but a tiny smirk formed at the corner of his lips. 

Jaskier smiled as well. “He doesn’t, does he? But he seems the type to attract beautiful women everywhere he goes.”

Geralt wished Jaskier would’ve just kept his mouth shut. He was slightly surprised to see that Y/N wasn’t shocked or jealous at all - he got that a lot from women and men alike. Instead she was amused, seemingly sensing his uneasiness. 

“I’m sure you’ve travelled far. Please, stay the night. Rest, get some ale and food in your stomachs before the next hunt.”

“That wo-”

“Of course,” Jaskier interrupted. “I am absolutely in desperate need of a bath and pie. And Geralt here needs some of his favorite lotion rubbed on his -”

“Thank you. For your hospitality.”

She smiled and again he was taken back by the brightness of it. It was real, adorned with sincerity that wasn’t trying to hide a sinister, sad force. He found it to be lost in the world he lived in.

“If any of you need anything, I’ll just be over there,” she said, pointing to her home. 

Geralt smiled politely at her, grabbing the reins to pull Roach towards the bar. 

“She’s lovely,” Jaskier noted as he followed. “And she’s not going to wait around Geralt. Just do yourself a favor and indulge in yourself for once. Forget about that dreadful Yen-”

He was cut off by a hard punch to the stomach, doubling over as the air was knocked out of him. 

-

She found him by the lake that night, taking solace in the comfortable silence of the night. Thankfully, everyone at the village left him alone, and he wouldn’t have been surprised to hear it by Y/N’s doing. 

“I’m not imposing, am I?”

He heard the small, careful steps coming towards him before she spoke.  

“No.”

Y/N sat down on the grass beside him, looking out towards the stretch of the lake, the little splashes here and there. The air was warm, the moon shined brightly down over the planes of the small village, and the stars twinkled delicately, like they were flashing lights dancing in the sky; he could faintly smell lillies off her hair when a breeze whispered through her hair. 

“Jaskier is a funny one,” she finally said. “But he’s a good man. Obviously cares for you.”

Geralt didn’t say anything. He continued staring in front of him, one leg stretched out in front of him and the other upright with his elbow leaned on it. 

She sighed softly and laid gently on her back, crossing her hands over her stomach. Geralt finally looked down at her, breath hitching when she tilted her head to meet his gaze. 

“What’s it like? Being a witcher, I mean.”

She took his short silence as an answer. “I-I’m sorry,” she stammered, abruptly sitting up. “I uh.. I’ve been known to be too curious for my own good. Can never keep my mouth shut.”

She chuckled lightly, trying to brush off her embarrassment. He sighed heavily through his nose and laid on his back just as she had, and waited until she did the same before he answered her. 

“You’re not a bother,” he said. “Not like Jaskier anyway.”

Y/N laughed and it was soft, whereas he expected it to be loud, annoying. He thought of lilacs and shut his eyes tightly, taking a deep breath to clear his mind. 

“It’s… tiring,” Geralt finally admitted. “But there are moments where it seems… worth it.”

She thought his words over, the heaviness laced behind them. 

“I can imagine,” she murmured. “Thank you. For saving our asses.”

His chest rumbled, and she smiled. She made him laugh. 

“You do it too.”

Y/N turned to look at him in confusion. “You’re a healer. You save people.”

She looked back up to the night sky with a somber expression. 

“Sometimes. Sometimes I can’t and… and I get to live with that.”

When he looked at her, he finally noticed the prominent circles under her eyes, the faraway glaze in her orbs. She was just as tired as he was, and maybe that was why she seemed to understand him better than others. 

“And die with it,” he finished softly. 

Y/N nodded. “But this is what we were made for. We were put here to do a job, whether it’s to be a Witcher, healer, bard, noblemen… either way, we’re just trying to live. So why not make the best of it?”

He wished, at the time, he listened to what she was saying, take her words in and put them to use. 

Instead, he wished her a good night and trudged to his room, passing by a snoring Jaskier. He dreamt of gooseberries and lillies. 

-

The third time he stayed for more than a week. He was gone for two months this time, and still it seemed as though she barely changed. 

Except this time she was exhausted and barely able to stand on her own two feet without stumbling. 

“You should rest,” Geralt told her. “There’s another healer, they can take your place.”

There were too many people in her small home, ill and in desperate need of her medicines. By his guess, she had not slept in over a day. 

“There’s too m’ny people,” she slurred. “Have to… take care of them.”

“I know,” he gently coursed. “But they can’t get it if you’re not well. Sleep, and I will make sure all is well as you do.”

Y/N stared pathetically at him before she reluctantly agreed, letting him lead her to her small bed. She was out as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Geralt of Rivia never expected that he’d come back for a simple healer such as herself. He hadn’t planned to until lillies was all he could smell, could think about, and her name was but a whisper on his lips as he awoke from memory filled dreams. 

He stood over her, watching her steady breathing as she slept. He could really appreciate her beauty then, without any wandering eyes. And it got him thinking of Yennefer again. The way she left despite giving her his heart. 

He vowed he wasn’t going to let anyone do that to him again. Hearing her name was still painful to him. But after these little visits he knew that Y/N was significantly different than Yennefer in almost every way, and it was exactly what he needed. 

So he stayed until she woke hours later in a daze. That small but bright smile that he only ever saw when she looked at him. It made his heart flutter. 

-

Geralt remembers the first time he kissed her. His lips were cut and chapped but hers were soft, and he tasted cinnamon on her tongue. 

She gasped into his mouth when he wrapped his arms around her waist and tugged her closer to him. 

When he saw her naked and nervous, he kissed every doubt away. Almost every inch of her skin was marked and touched by his lips. Every sigh and moan that left her went straight to his heart - and his cock. 

“Beautiful,” he found himself whispering. 

He couldn’t stop whispering it when he slid into her warm depths, holding her to him as if she was going to slip away. 

“I won’t,” she promised, as if she could read his mind. 

He believed her.

-

“I want to stop loving you but I can’t and it’s fucking destroying me.”

He hated that he was making her cry. 

“I never meant for any of this to happen.”

And he really meant it. 

“Just,” she sobbed. “Why can’t we have it then, Geralt? I don’t see you as a monster, and I’ll say that for the rest of my days if that’s what it takes.”

But he was. He was and he only brought people down. Jaskier nearly died under his care, Yennefer left him, and everyone looked towards him with nothing but fear and hatred in their eyes. 

Geralt ran. Ran from the body that once laid at his feet. Ran from her rising voice, from Jaskier’s, from lilies and lilacs and gooseberries. 

Jaskier found him an hour later by a small stream in the middle of the forest surrounding her village. He didn’t know why he stayed, why he laid in bed countless nights listening to her tell stories of her childhood as he exchanged his battle scars. Why he let Jaskier stay and see him become vulnerable with this healer. 

Because he was nothing but a monster. No matter how hard he tried not to be, he couldn’t deny that part of him that was dominant in his eyes. Y/N didn’t deserve any of that, didn’t need that darkness enveloping her light. 

“Thought I might find you around here,” Jaskier muttered, stumbling towards him before sitting down on the ground next to him. “She’s looking for you, you know. Just go ba-”

“No,” Geralt growled. “She… she saw who I really am now and I don’t need to bring her down too.”

“So have you brought me down, Geralt? Face it, she’s not Yennefer.” 

Geralt whipped his head towards him, glaring at him with clenched teeth, but he kept going. 

“Y/N is Y/N. And I like to think I know you well enough to know that she has itched her way under your thick skin and you can’t get her out and you hate that. You’re so afraid of loving again that you’d rather hurt her than give it a shot! Well what about her, Geralt. Doesn’t she get a say in any of this?”

She did. 

Geralt wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. He didn’t want to forget her. But Jaskier was right, Y/N was very important to him now, and he was a selfish man. 

And he knew, without a doubt, that Y/N would never look at him as he looked at himself. 

“Sometimes I wonder if I’m good enough,” Geralt admitted. 

It took everything he had in him to admit this out loud to Jaskier - out of all people. 

Jaskier nodded, shuffling closer to him. 

“Yen was like rain,” Jaskier said, more to himself than Geralt. “And Y/N is the sun. So which do you choose, Witcher? Or am I going to walk all the way back by myself and tell that poor girl that you’re not coming back?”

-

Geralt remembers the first time he told her he loved her. And now, standing outside of his small cottage in the middle of a beautiful green forest, he basks in the warmth of the sun and the music of the birds as they fly by. 

“A beautiful day love,” she sings. “We should go for a walk.”

Geralt smiles and for the first time in a very long time, he feels nothing but peace in his heart. 

He hums when he feels her arms wrap around his middle, leaning her head against his back. He wraps his arms over hers and sways in tune with her. 

“What were you thinking about?” She asks. 

Geralt smiles softly and turns her around in his arms until she’s looking up at him, chin pressed against his chest. 

“You,” he answers honestly. “Us.”

She smiles back. “Good things I hope?”

He chuckles and she follows and he knows that there’s nothing in this world right now that can touch them. 

“Of course.”

  Tags: @scarlett-berserker​, @justlovetoreadfics​, @lil-baby27​, @mando-vibes​, @beepbeepyabitch, @that-void-witch​, @im-the-music-whore​, @certifiedhunter​, @softpedropascal​, @hejahockey​, @okaydacre​, @lemongrove​, @appreciating-chase-brody​, @iwontforgettheapplepie, @mybabyboytony​, @olyamoriarty, @pcrushinnerd​, @elusive-ivory​, @dizzydazed​, @bluejeancntrygrl​, @dadzawas-eyebags​, @moonstruck-witchy​ @our-mrlangdon, @parody-the-emi​, @evalynanne​, @purplewaterbird​, @vikingqueen28​, @tedpicklez​, @blunt-cake-yes​, @agoldin​, @lustriix​, @readsalot73​, @kateb013​, @eupphoriaaa​

[shuahoonie]

you. [tom holland] - six.

PAIRING: tom holland x female!celebrity!reader

SUMMARY: ah, to be young and in love. it sounds great if only you and tom were actually dating out of pure love and not for the sheer reputation of your careers. it also should be great if you two actually got along, but life isn’t that easy.

WARNINGS: mostly swearing! mentions of alcohol! a bit of fluff, a bit of angst. it’s haters to lovers / fake dating au so take that information as you wish! 

WORD COUNT: 2735

SONG INSPO: can’t take my eyes off you - emilie mover 

A/N: hiya babes, again, sorry if this chapter is posted very late. i have absolutely no excuses this time, it’s just me really. times are tough and if i’m being honest, i’ve had a rough couple of weeks. my academics really hit me in the worst possible way and i’m really am sorry if i wasn’t able to uphold my promises to post over the break. 🥺 also, beware of my plot timeline! i had a rough plan that i wanted this to take place during pre-ffh days! anyway, enjoy chapter six and happy reading! x 

UPDATES EVERY SATURDAY 11 PM CST WHENEVER I CAN  [I’M TRYING TO POST EVERY SATURDAY, I REALLY AM]

gif credits: @parkerpunology

vanessa’s masterlist | preview | one | two | three | four | five | seven | eight | eight.5 [interview excerpt] 

Two months. You and Tom were already dating for two months. The last two months were a whirlwind for both of you, more so for you. Once the news broke out that you and Tom were dating, it was expected that people would lose their minds over it. 

However, like how news typically withholds its relevance these days, it died down a week after. You both actually didn’t mind it since it put you two at ease. You and Tom see each other for thrice a week, dropping a few nuggets that you two are together. 

Some days, Tom would drop by at your filming location. 

“Y/N,” Steven, a stunt coordinator, sang your name with a teasing look painted on his face. “Guess who’s here.” He was helping you with your scene, making sure that you were safe as you did your stunts.

“Please tell me it’s Charlotte with my phone,” You moaned as you fixed your shirt as Steven began unbuckling your harness. You were standing on top of a high platform and had just finished doing your stunt for the show, the Alchemist. 

“Honey, do you think I’d be this excited if it was your assistant with your phone?” Steven rolled his eyes. “It’s your loverboy,” He teased, pointing to a figure. 

Based on the state of altitude you were in, you could practically see everybody. You can see some of the crew were busy with fixing the set for the following scene. You could see the producer busy speaking to whoever’s on the other side of the phone. You could also see your ‘loverboy’ talking to the director. 

Tom was standing next to Alissa, the director, as they talked animatedly. He was wearing a grey shirt that hugged his body like a second skin and a pair of black joggers. He looked very casual, but as much as you hated to admit it, he still looked good. 

Catching your gaze, Tom gave you a smile and a wave. 

You were still getting used to the idea that you were seeing him, so you turned your head as fast as you could. It’s as if your crush caught you staring at him in middle school. 

Steven let out a small giggle, “You guys are so cute. You two are like grade-schoolers.” 

“Oh, shush.” You said as you felt your face burn, embarrassed that Steven caught what just happened. 

“Shush yourself, hon,” Steven laughed “It seems like Tom found it absolutely adorable.” 

You turned your head back to look at Tom and there with his arms crossed, he was laughing softly. He had his complete attention on you. 

You signalled him to give you a minute as you descend from the platform to greet your ‘boyfriend’. 

Seeing that you both were actors, you had to use your skill sometimes.

“Tommy,” You’ve grown to love that nickname for Tom, knowing that he absolutely despised it. “What are you doing here?” You asked, your tone sickeningly sweet, as you greeted him with a hug. 

For a moment, his eyes flickered upon hearing the nickname you just called him. “Came here to surprise you, princess.” He said with a smirk as he squeezed you in a hug. He knew you hated that nickname too. It was obvious that you two were playing the same game. 

“Oh, but you didn’t have to, Tommy,” You said with a huge smile, the words practically gritting in between your teeth.

“I know,” He replied. What he did next caught you off-guard being that you two never really displayed that amount of PDA out in the open. “However, I do miss my girlfriend and I wanted to surprise her.” He said before he held the side of your face and placed a soft kiss on your cheek. 

Boy, you were surprised alright. 

Some days, you would drop by at Tom’s filming locations. 

Tom had just finished his scene with Jake Gyllenhaal. You decided to visit your ‘boyfriend’ at his set for Far From Home. As soon as the director yelled cut, Tom caught your eye and gave you a wave.

“Are you getting bored, babe?” You turned to the figure who just asked you the question and saw Zendaya wearing her MJ clothes. You’ve grown a huge liking towards Tom’s castmates ever since Tom introduced you to them, especially Zendaya since she’s been nothing but nice to you. 

You gave Zendaya a small smile and shook your head no. You’ve sat and watched them shoot for a little over two hours now, and it was only reasonable that he’d ask how you were doing. 

“You know, you two are absolutely adorable.” She commented as she gave you a playful nudge, sitting next to you. 

“We’re absolutely not,” You chuckled, feeling shy.

“It’s true,” Zendaya laughed “Tom seems like he’s at his happiest whenever he’s with you.” 

As if on cue, Tom started jogging his way towards you and Zendaya with a huge smile on his face. 

“Hi, princess,” Tom engulfed you with a huge hug. “Are you still good? What are you two laughing at?” He asked in the middle of the hug. 

The intimacy you two had to show in public was still something you had to work on-not so much for Tom though. You weren’t used to displaying affection even when you used to date your ex.

“Oh, we’re just laughing at you.” You said nonchalantly, a teasing smile hanging off your lips. 

“Me? Why me?” 

“Because you’ve got it bad for Y/N,” Zendaya answered cheekily, “You’re happier around your girlfriend, Tom.” 

“Yeah, that’s true.” Tom acknowledged making you roll your eyes playfully. “I am at my best whenever I’m around Y/N.” He said as cupped the sides of your face and planted a small kiss on the top of your nose.

You begged to differ. Tom had to act like he’s at his happiest whenever he’s around you. 

“Liv, I look ridiculous. I don’t even have the boobs for this.” You said as you finished putting on the bridesmaid dress and examined your chest, as the dress sported a deep v-neck. You and Veronica were standing in front of a mirror, wearing a floor-length burgundy chiffon dress. 

“Shut up, Y/N,” Veronica said as she fixed the delicately pinned flowers on your hair. “You look great, I think Tom might actually fall in love with you.” Ronnie teased. 

“Fuck off, Ronnie.” You mumbled. “I can’t believe you actually let me invite him, Liv.” You told Olivia, who was busy getting into her wedding dress. 

“Uh, of course. He’s your boyfriend, ‘ya doof.” Olivia, who was putting on her dress behind the dressing panel, said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Also can you two help me with my dress? I need someone to zip me up.” Liv went out wearing a gorgeous wedding dress. It was an off-shoulder sweetheart cut white dress with touches of lace and glimmer. 

“Oh, you look gorgeous, Liv.” Veronica sighed as she stared at Olivia with tears brimming her eyes. “I still can’t believe you’re getting married this soon, girl.” 

“I know,” Olivia agreed, fixing her hair, “but I just love him you know? He makes me a better person. I’ve never felt love like this before.” She said while trying to fight off the tears that were forming on her eyes. 

You and Veronica rushed in to give Olivia a huge hug, tears were close to shedding and all of you didn’t want to sit in the makeup chair again. 

You were so sure that Olivia was rushing to get married, that maybe she wasn’t thinking things through. However, as you saw your best friend be at the happiest she’s ever been, you figured that getting married was probably the most adamant decision Olivia has ever made. 

At 24, Olivia found herself in the arms of the person she’s bound to spend her whole life with. 

“I gotta walk down that aisle before I ruin my makeup completely,” Olivia said half-jokingly, fanning herself. 

And so she did. Olivia managed to walk down the aisle without completely crying her makeup off, Josh, however, lost it. He was fully sobbing as soon as he saw Olivia walk. 

You couldn’t help but smile at the sight of the two of them, you saw two people so full of love that the only way to express it was to cry. 

As the ceremony proceeded on, your thoughts were somewhere else. You’ve always wondered if ever you’ll find someone who’ll make you feel the same way as them, that tears would start falling because you were so in love.

However, that would have to wait as you were currently tied with the person you were sure you weren’t going to be in love with. Your gaze automatically went to Tom, who was coincidentally staring at you. You turned your attention back to the couple who were getting married in front of you, your cheeks burning. 

Your mind was about to come up with different possible reasons as to why Tom was staring at you, but you had to stop yourself. You don’t need that in your life. 

“You okay, Y/N?” Ronnie asked as she took a sip of her champagne. You nodded your head and finished your third glass of champagne. “Are you sure? Because I’ve known you long enough to know that you start to drink heavily when something’s bugging you.” 

The reception was over and the newly-wed couple has had their first dance as husband and wife. People were now just letting themselves loose on the dancefloor. 

“I’m fine, Ronnie,” You assured her as you called the waiter to give you another glass. “Don’t mind me, you know how weddings make me feel.” 

“Yes, which is why I’m terrified.” Veronica murmured. 

“Don’t be silly, Ronnie. I can handle myself really.” You said as you scanned the crowd. You saw Tom talking to a couple of girls, seeming like he was desperate to get out of the conversation as soon as possible. 

Soon enough, he caught you staring and it seemed like he was relieved to see you. Not long after, he was practically running to you. 

“Looks like prince charming is coming to get you,” Veronica chuckled as she grabbed her purse and drink from the table. “I’ll see you later, babe. Text me if you’re leaving.” 

“Where are you going and why are you leaving me?” You practically whined. Veronica wasn’t surprised, you were whiny after three drinks. 

“I have to go and meet Josh’s parents, they wanted to see me after mentioning that I was looking for a place that I could do my internship,” Ronnie explained “Besides, it looks like you’re going to be taken care of. If you aren’t, call me ASAP.” 

You huffed and dismissed your friend. As soon as Veronica left, Tom arrived at your table. 

“Oh, thank god I saw you Y/N. It was brutal out there, some people just can’t get a hint-”

“Why are you here?” You asked as soon as Tom sat down next to you. Tom was caught off-guard by your hostility. 

“I-uh, what?” Tom wasn’t really sure what’s happening, sure enough, what he did wrong to have you act this way. This wouldn’t be much of a surprise if he knew that he pressed your buttons way too many times, however, that wasn’t the case. 

“Aren’t you busy talking to those girls over there?” You asked, now grateful for the newly filled glass of champagne that was just handed to you. The waiter was about to give Tom too but he kindly refused. 

“Actually, I was desperate to leave the conversation. It was getting annoying and they kept insisting that I’m just dating you for clout.” Tom explained as he massaged his temples. 

“They weren’t lying.” You mumbled before taking a sip from your glass. “You looked like you were having fun though-which I didn’t mind, by the way.” 

“Y/N-”

“Tom, you know you can just leave all of this, right? Like no one is forcing you to stay this long because you won’t get the short end of the stick. It’s me who's going to get most of the damage.” 

“That’s not true, Y/N. I’m just as affected as you will be.” Tom stressed. “Where is this all coming from?” He asked, getting frustrated. 

Much like Tom, you were getting frustrated too. Why are you being hostile around him? It’s not like he’s actually dating you, you have no reason to act this way. 

“Alcohol makes me see things more clearly,” You muttered. It was all that you could say. After all, nothing was making sense for you.  

“That’s what got us in trouble in the first place,” He claimed as he grabbed your glass and placed it far away from you. Tom stood up and offered his hand to you. “Come, let’s dance. It’ll clear your head.” 

“I don’t want to,” You moaned as you threw your head back. “I planned on drinking so if you’re not going to join me, then just leave.”

Tom shook his head no. “I got a note from Ronnie that I need to stop you after three drinks and apparently, you’re on your fourth so ‘nough is enough, princess.” 

“Even if I’m not going to drink, I’m still not dancing with you.” You said as you crossed your arms. 

“Wanna bet?” You just sat there and listened. You were interested as there was no way in hell he can make you dance. 

“That wasn’t fair, you practically set me up.” You grumbled as Tom happily led you to the dance floor. The jig was if you stood up, you’re automatically going to dance with Tom. 

Being the ‘sneaky little shit’ (Veronica’s choice of words) that Tom was, he secretly texted Ronnie and asked her if she could potentially lure you into assisting her to the washrooms. 

You were skeptical at first, but you eventually obliged. It was Ronnie’s choice of words that made you do it. “Y/N, I swear to god, I’m about to pee. If you don’t help me unzip my dress, I will physically hurt you.” 

Tom was now short of 50 bucks because of that favour. 

“Oh, c’mon, princess. You know that isn’t true.” Tom tried to keep a straight face but obviously failed as he was now grinning at your annoyed face. 

“This is ridiculous, you know that I’m a horrible dancer right?” You said as Tom put your arms around his neck and he placed his hands on your waist. 

“I think I’ll manage, princess.” He chuckled. 

“No, I’m not kidding. You will leave with a huge bruise on your foot-feet. I might step on both of your feet, there’s a huge possibility.”

Tom stared at you for a moment before saying, “I guess it’s a price I’m willing to pay.”

They were playing a slower version of “Can’t Take My Eyes Off You” and you groaned softly. “What’s wrong, princess?” 

“You’ll never let that pet name go, won’t you?” You asked, rolling your eyes. 

“No, I don’t think I will.” He answered cheekily. 

You two slow danced to the melody of the song and you couldn’t help it but say, “God, I love this song. Why did they have to play it?”

“I guess it was meant to be- Oh god, it’s them again,” Tom said as he saw the girls who were trying to steal his attention all night. 

You took a look at the girls and sure enough, they were watching the two of you and were whispering amongst themselves. You didn’t know who they were so you were assuming they were on Josh’s guests. 

You weren’t one to start fights however, you were extremely petty though. It’s a habit you’re trying to get rid of. “Hey, Tom?” 

He hummed in response. “Do you want to finally get them off your back?” You asked him. He stared at you for a moment before nodding. 

“I’m going to do something but promise me you’ll forget it as soon as it’s done.” You disclosed, not even knowing why you’re actually going to do it. 

“Okay...” You knew he was getting curious. “What-”

You grabbed the side of his face and kissed the corner of his lips. To say that both of you were surprised was an understatement. 

TAGLIST:

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Can’t tag:

@sectusempried

[human-trash-fire]

Shot Through The Heart: CH4

I couldn’t wait to share the next chapter, so you beautiful humans are getting it early! As always mad shout-outs to everyone who is following along/ RB/ liking this fic <3 I can’t tell you all how fucking grateful I am for all of you. 

special thanks to @highqueenofelfhame​ for previewing the fic and making me feel like it’s worth it to write!

As always the fic is available in its entirety on ao3 glam_reaper2

** IMPORTANT NOTE: The header image is 100% what Rowan imagines when she takes a shot even though it definitely didn’t go down that way.**

******************************************************************************** Aelin:

Two weeks had come and gone since she had hauled the giant box full of goodies to the post office. Fenrys told her that mail was always delayed but that he was both excited and grateful they had sent them something. She made him promise two things: one, he wouldn’t tell the rest of the cadre that a package was coming. Aelin knew that they mentioned sending the boys something, but she didn’t want them to know when. And two, they had to open their care packages ‘Yulemas style’ all sitting around, on Skype, so Lys, Elide and her could watch their faces/ get a chance to finally talk to them face to face. 

During those two weeks they continued their flirty conversation when he wasn’t on mission and away from his phone. She woke up nearly every morning to a text, and fell asleep texting him each night. After the first few days they had moved their conversation off twitter, they iMessaged back and forth and had exchanged Snapchat information so they could send each-other little videos and such. Talking to Fenrys was comfortable. He found a way to brighten almost any situation, and she found that anytime she was irritated recently he could always cheer her up. She kept most of her past private, and though he volunteered more intimate details of his life he never pushed her to share hers. It was nice, if she was being honest, even if this went absolutely no where she was so glad to have met him.

Fenrys told her stories about his friends too, Aelin got the impression that he was kind of like their glue. He was the youngest at 27 (apparently Connall was born 3 minutes earlier and had lorded that fact over him for as long as he could remember). Vaughn and Gavriel were both 28, Rowan was 29, and Lorcan (Elide’s new project) was 30. He and Connall had enlisted when they were 18, they attended training in Perranth and ended up qualifying for special forces at an unheard of 19. That’s when they met the others, the Cadre. Aelin laughed so hard when she found out that’s what they’re known as in the military world, she had thought she was just being cheeky when she’d called them so in their video. That’s also how Connall had met Vaughn. Apparently, he spent 4 years pining after him. 

>> So how did they end up together?

 << It was so obvious they were into each other but too ‘bro’ to say anything. Worried about “team dynamic” or whatever, because Gods know we didn’t give a shit if they’re together. Then one day we’re taking shots at a bar, Con is talking to some dude, I think he was honestly trying to get over his feelings. Vaughn sees this and gets mad jealous, slams a double shot of Johnny Walker, mutters ‘fuck it’ and storms right up to them. He grabs other dude by the shoulder, shoved him out of the way, and right as Con was about to say something he kissed him. We cheered, we all got entirely too drunk, and now here we are! It’s been 4 years and I’m so happy for them.

>> That’s fucking amazing, and honestly romantic! <3

The Cadre as it stood now had been the most elite team for 8 years, running blackops around the world. And tonight was the night she and the girls would get to talk to them for the first time. Aelin was so excited she could barely contain it, there was nothing more fulfilling than giving someone a gift in her opinion.

*********************************************************

Rowan:

They finally had some down time. Command had promised them 2 days, which was more time than Rowan had expected. They’d been running themselves ragged ever since they discovered Maeve was in country. There was talk about an intel operative gathering more information on her plan, but so far they hadn’t gotten the call Rowan had waited 5 years for. He wanted a green light. He wanted her dead. He was stuck waiting on orders, and had spent 2 weeks seething while they ran, in his opinion, bullshit missions up and down the sector. 

It had also been two weeks since Rowan had woken up to two instagram notifications. He had, in all honesty, forgotten he had the app. Work was his life, and he was never big on social media, but there they were. It was 0330 and he reached over, seeing the notifications he clicked and his jaw hit the floor. Aelin Galathynius had not only followed him but liked one of his pictures… The oldest picture there. What the fuck? He thought as he stared at her name right below the picture. This has to be an accident, but why would she be looking this far back? He didn’t really know how to feel about it. She was stunning, she was famous, and she was Fen’s date. She shouldn’t be liking his shit on instagram. She should even know who he was. 

He clicked her name.

There were hundreds of pictures, her with her friend’s, her with her dog, her with nearly every famous young person in Orynth. There were red carpet photos and vacation photos, little videos from different movie sets and links to fundraisers for various social causes. He didn’t realize he’d been scrolling through them for so long until Fenrys yelled at him for sleeping in. He quickly shut down the app and hurried off.

For the next two weeks he found himself going back to her instagram more that any healthy person should. There was something about her eyes, there had always been something about her eyes, since the first time he saw her on screen. They swallowed him whole, it was like drowning in an ocean of fire and- what the hell is wrong with you? Get your shit together Whitethorn. He chided himself. His mind was all over the damn place. Fenrys, as expected, hadn’t kept to his “no talking about her ever again” end of the bargain. Being his spotter he was with him nearly 18 hours a day, the boy never shut up. Apparently they hadn’t stopped talking, and Rowan caught him sending stupid snapchats or typing furiously with a shit-eating grin on his face nearly ever moment they were back with their phones. Everytime his face lit up, or he said something like “Aelin was saying…” he found himself clenching his jaw. He had no idea why, he was happy for Fen, this was his dream come true. 

Rowans jaw hurt.

*********************************

“Wash up boys, and try to look presentable, meet me in the office at 1700. Don’t fucking be late,” Fenrys said to them after training. It may be down time, but they all still met at the base gym for a few hours of PT in the afternoon.

“What the hell for?” Lorcan grumbled. Fenrys just winked and sauntered towards the showers.

1655 on the dot Rowan walked into the office, followed by Connall and Vaughn. The others were already there, Lorcan and Gavriel looking just as confused as he felt, and Fenrys with that insufferable grin plastered on his face. He had showered, brushed his hair, and put on possibly the tightest shirt he owned with a pair of black joggers. Rowan caught his eye and lifted a brow.

“Alright you grumpy bastards, grab a chair and come here,” Fenrys instructed while pointing towards the projector they used for movie nights. It had a camera attached to the top for more official calls with command, and they often used it to Skype their families back home. Skype was pulled up now, and they all found their seats in front of the screen. Rowan sitting towards the center chair that was left open for Fen. Vaughn and Connall had taken the two to his right while Lorcan and Gavriel brought up the other end. 

Fen was dragging a giant box out from beneath his desk when the familiar ringing began to echo through the room. He immediately dropped it in front of his chair and scrambled to answer the call. “Hello gorgeous,” he purred as the image on the screen in front of them came into focus. Once again, the cadre was floored. 

“Hello handsome,” Aelin winked. “Gentleman” she nodded to them all and stepped back. Alongside her sat Elide and Lysandra, smiling and waving at the screen. The men sat up a little straighter, and awkwardly waved back.

“Is it ready?” Aelin practically squealed.

“Yeah! Should I open it?” Fenrys asked, and Rowans attention shot back to the moving box in front of their chairs. No way, he thought. They had mentioned the possibility of sending them something but he didn’t honestly believe it would happen. Agreeing to come to the ball was already unbelievable, but a care package? The box was so big it easily could have fit a body. 

“One second. Okay so Hi, I’m Aelin, obviously, and these are my girls.” She gestured beside her. “It’s so nice to officially get to talk to you all! We’ve heard so much about you from Fen.”

Fen, she says. Like they’re close. Rowan’s jaw clenched again. He shook his head and crossed his arms, then uncrossed them because he realized he probably looked rude. He didn’t know what to do with his hands and was so busy trying to look nonchalant he was startled when he heard his name.

“Whitethorn!” Fen yelled, it clearly wasn’t the first time he’d called for him. “Say hello to the women and try and remember your manners.”

“Oh,” he cleared his throat. “Hey... I’m Rowan.”

“We know,” Aelin smiled, and Rowan was momentarily stupid.

“Okay, as much fun as official introductions are, Fen can you open the box? Inside it are smaller boxes with each of your names. Enjoy!” Aelin chimed. As Fenrys ripped open the box Elide and Lysandra started asking each of them questions. At the same time Aelin reached past the camera to grab 3 shot glasses and a bottle of Johnny Walker. Jealous Rowan thought. That was his favorite drink. Of course she would drink it, she looks like that, and shoots whiskey. Gods have mercy...

Fenrys passed him a large box, and when they each held their own he spoke again. “This is like Yulemas Ace, thank  you! Can we just tear them open or do we go one at a time?” Ace? How adorable. Rowan’s eyes found Aelin’s again, and it felt like she was looking at him, but it was a giant screen and that was nonsense.

“Oh, tear in! Fen told us a little about each of you so we tried to go with things you might like. I hope we guessed right!” Aelin’s smile was like the sun, as he looked down to begin opening the package on his lap Rowan felt a rare smile grace his own lips in response. With a loud cracking noise 6 boxes popped open, and the room was filled with “NO WAY”s and “ THANK YOU”s as the cadre tore through their gifts. 

On the top of each box was an Orynth Bane Jersey, they were all Ashryver jerseys (obviously) and stitched in the pro style. As he unfurled his he realised that the entire team had signed the jerseys for each of the men. He began shaking his head, this was already more than they could have ever asked for.

“The boys wanted to say thank you as well! Aideon and Ren got you all, and us, some front row, 50 yard line-” At that Elide made an unladylike snort, Aelin choked, and Lysandra glared. The Cadre was clearly missing something. Aelin cleared her throat in an attempt to recover, “50 yardline tickets. Whole VIP experience for the Adarlan game in November!” She finished, and that statement was met with cheers from all of them. The Bane was their favorite team, and while they had seen a couple games they never could have dreamt of what she was talking. Granted her cousin was the starting QB and “Ren” was his best running-back. This is insane he thought.

With the jersey, and tickets out of the way Rowan looked back into the box. Sitting right there was a bottle of Johnny Walker black label, 3 expensive cigars, a cutter, a lighter, and a shot glass that read “SSG Whitethorn reporting for Booty.” He didn’t know when he had started giggling like a school boy, but he was entirely sure he looked like an idiot. 

He looked up with his shot glass in hand, and stared at the screen. The others still had their heads in their boxes, but he was looking at her. “Classic,” he wiggled the shot glass “Thank you so much Aelin.” She smiled a soft smile, and nodded. 

He glanced around and saw his friends had all received a bottle of their favorite liquor as well, Connall and Vaughn were already lighting a cigar each while digging through the rest of their boxes. The smoke was sweet, and the room smelled of vanilla and burnt sugar. The girls were currently taking shots on skype and clapping when something new was unveiled or explaining why they included certain random things.

“Salvaterre!” Elide shouted. The tiny woman’s cheeks had begun to flush, she was clearly feeling the shots she had taken so far. Lorcan’s head shot up and she giggled, he sat up a little straighter, and she leaned into the camera. “There’s something a little special in there for you, you’ll know it when you see it. That’s from me. You’re welcome.” She winked and Rowan swore his friend blushed. The rest of the men had seen it too because everyone began laughing, and he made a note to try and figure out what exactly she’d sent that made him act that way. 

The next thing he unpacked was a pair of super lush running shoes, Fenrys clearly had given all their shoe sizes to the women because he was holding a $200 pair of black sneakers. It was beyond too much but Aelin looked so excited when they all started trying them on, the desert ruined your shoes. The last items in the box were something else entirely. A small stuffed hawk sat in one corner, it wore a nametag: Buzzard. He raised it and an eyebrow to the screen and Aelin started laughing. “Buzzard?” he asked.

“Indeed sir. Can’t tell you why though, it’s a secret.” She slammed a shot back “You each got a little stuffed animal to keep you company on the long nights. Since you can’t have puppies in the desert apparently.” He shook his head laughing, this girl was too much. Next to where the Hawk had been laying was a wrapped package. He lifted it up and was about to tear it open when she half screamed, “WAIT! Okay so, wait. This is my favorite gift.” She had everyone’s attention now turned to him. Fenrys was laughing, apparently he knew what came next.

“Oooookayyyyyy.. I’m a little nervous,” Rowan admitted. He didn’t like the spotlight on him like this.

“Well here’s the thing, as you can see everyone got their favorite sweets,” she made a sweeping motion at the camera. “Candy is an important food group, but Fen said you don’t like sugar or something. Which by the way is blasphemous. Anyways, I asked what your favorite food was and he said-”

“MEAT ON A STICK!” The entire cadre chorused, along with all three women on screen. They were all laughing like it was the funniest thing they had ever heard. 

“But I couldn’t send you a kabob, so I figured this would be the next best thing!!”

He tore open the package in his hands. Sitting there were 8 bags of beef jerky and a packet of skewers. He started laughing  so hard, tears were streaming down his face, “Thank you!” he croaked between fits of laughter. 

After the gifts were all opened, cigars were lit and shots were poured. The group drank and laughed for hours. At one point the girls started playing music on their end, and the Rowan found himself singing along with everyone to Bohemian Rhapsody and watching Aelin dance on her kitchen table. It was the lightest he’d felt in years. Lorcan and Elide had exchanged numbers and he could see the girl texting him from the screen. Connall and Vaughn were in the corner in matching jerseys kissing and dancing to the music on the speakers.

They eventually said their goodnight’s, and another round of heartfelt thank you’s. As Rowan half stumbled into his bed he found himself still smiling and holding the small stuffed Hawk that smelled of lavender and embers.

***************************************************************

TAG LIST <3

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[totallypathet]

Episode Eleven

Finally, some good fucking mini challenge. Everybody loves puppets! I always love the puppet challenge, it's good old fashioned drag race fun!

It looked like the girls were having a good time, lost of them did a good job... except Gigi. Gigi was just hard to watch. It's becoming a bit of a theme, and it's a shame. I also actually didn't think Jaida's was funny? They put laugh sounds (the trademark Roople cackle) over it, but she didn't tell any jokes, and she didn't deliver it like comedy. At least, not in the edit they showed.

Anyway, the main challenge for this week was to write a one woman show! I was a little bit confused by the assignment, I wasn't sure if it was meant to all be comedy, or how far they were allowed to extend into other avenues. I also think 5 minutes is tough for a one woman show, it's not a lot of time to do more than one thing - so essentially you just end up with a comedy routine anyway. It was a bit bizarre.

And the guest judge was the legendary Whoopi Goldberg!!! I love Whoopi so much, I was so excited to see her on there! And she was a really great mentor and judge! She coached them all well, gave them good constructive feedback on their routines, and as a judge she was so constructive and good natured and funny! I just adore her.

Anyway, now the fangirling is done, let's break down this week...

1. Crystal Methyd

Crystal won a challenge!!! It's been such a long time coming, and oh my god she deserved it so much this week! Her show had me rolling, it was so absurd and ridiculous, I just loved it! And she was clearly having such a ball doing it, and we all know that's my favourite thing to watch. In fact, that was my favourite Whoopi critique, was when Ceystal was talking about how she wanted to make people laugh, and Whoopi said "So make it fun for you." Because that's 100% right, like most of the time if we (the audience) see someone is having fun, we'll have fun with them. Such an important lesson.

And Phenomenal Phil ended up being the absolute funniest one up there! Crystal gave us fun, she gave us absurd, she had puns, she had ridiculous dance moves, she had everything for me. I was so proud, the whole way through, because I felt like we were watching pure, unfiltered, unbothered Crystal Methyd. And she wasn't worried about being too weird, or if she was making everybody in the room laugh, she was just rolling with it, and enjoying it.

Also I loved her look! Again, such pure Crystal, I was tripping balls and I loved it.

10/10 for me this week, she deserved that win, and she deserves her spot in the top 4.

2. Gigi Goode

Gigi is literally unravelling before our eyes, and its genuinely really hard to watch. I think it's really getting to her now that she really does have serious competition, and she doesn't know how to handle it.

Her concept was really funny, and she had some great jokes in there, she had a great character as well, but Ross was right, it felt so scripted. She didn't trust herself to ad-lib in sections that the audience were really enjoying, she was too busy thinking about what her next line was, and it made it too stilted. It was a shame, because it had so much potential.

Having said all that, "go fuck yourself, Gary" was probably my favourite line of the night, because it just came out of nowhere for me. It's interesting, I think it felt worse somehow that there were parts that were really funny. I think 5 minutes of average laughter seems kind of fine - but if one joke gets raucous laughter, the silence is real obvious if the next joke fails.

Her runway was cute. I caught the reference, she looked good, she did the assignment. It wasn't anything special, which is (unfortunately) where most of Gigi's looks for the last few weeks have been for me. Given how she came in, with 4 incredible looks in episode 1, I've been disappointed.

3. Heidi N Closet/Heidi Afrodite

I feel so sad that Heidi's gone, I really thought she was going to make top 4. I feel like she's come such a long way from episode 1, and honestly no-one has charisma like Heidi has charisma. Also what am I going to do without her confessionals? Her, Widow and Jaida were carrying those confessionals, and now there's only Jaida left? Devastating.

But, unfortunately, she did deserve to go this week. Her performance was the worst. I honestly think there were too many characters. Also it was impossible to tell who was who, I think she needed differentiators, like Jackie had with the different glasses. I think she could have done one of 2 things; reduced the characters to just two, so it was easier to follow, or make the confusion part of the comedy. Like, it would have been really funny if she'd had these 4 characters, and she was running around trying to play them all and getting the wrong voice or accessory, like "granny why are you talking like Slick?", or "give me back my glasses Sharon!", and it just ended up like "who are you again?" and just really play into that confusion. I wonder if she was trying to keep it too close to life, and forgot to exaggerate the comedy. It was unfortunate.

Her runway thooooough. That dress was so beautiful, and honestly her face was (I think) the prettiest it's been for the whole competition. The only shame about it was that that's not a lip syncing gown. Particularly not a Prince lip syncing gown. But it was stunning, she went out looking beautiful, with her head held high, and with such a bright future. I can't wait to see what she does next!

4. Jackie Cox

Jackie pulled it out this week. She did such a great show, it was funny, it was heartwarming, it was personal, and it told us so much about Jackie. I think Whoopi's coaching really stuck with her, when she said that she doesn't do stand up because she's not funny, she tells stories? I think they resonated with Jackie, and maybe took a little of the comedy pressure off, and gave her space to do something a little more personal, and tell her story, and not worry about telling jokes. I think that freedom really opened the space for natural humour, and I think Jackie is naturally funny! She did an excellent job this week, and I was so proud.

Her look this week, I enjoyed; it was high concept, high drag, but also really fun! I didn't get the reference at all, I think it's to a song, but I have never heard it. But honestly that didn't even matter, I thought she looked like a haute couture grinch. It was out of the box for Jackie, not at all what I expected, and I loved it.

5. Jaida Essence Hall

I think Ross nailed Jaida's performance when he said "I bet it was hilarious when she called her best friend and told that story". Because I bet it was! Shit, I'd laugh if my best friend called me up and told me that story, but it just didn't work in a stage context. It was a real shame, because I could see that she was trying, and that she knew it wasn't working. Jaida was in a really tough spot this week, because she went on after someone sho has no idea how to shut up and stayed on stage 12 minutes longer than she should have. Honestly, I dont know why they let her keep talking, they should have signalled her and stopped her.

Anyway, Jaida had to follow that, and honestly the best thing she could have done when she walked out there was acknowledge it. Say something like "I did have a story to tell you, but I've forgotten it now." Change the energy of the room. Honestly though, I think Jaida had the same problem as Gigi, she didn't trust herself. She knew that the audience wasn't feeling her story, I wish she'd just trusted that feeling and cut it off, done something different and tried to get the audience back on side.

All of that aside, she had (I think) the best look on the runway. It was so sleek, so chic, and so gorgeous. I loved it so much, she felt like a fashion front cover. Which, to be fair, she does most of the time.

She did deserve to be in the bottom this week, but she also really deserved to stay, and she really deserves her place in the top 4 as well.

So next week is the last week before the reunion! From the preview, it looks like they're all wearing their entrance looks again, so I'm excited to see what that's about. I'm also wondering how they're going to do the reunion. Will it be the same, just with more distance between the chairs? Will they do it by a zoom call? Will they just wait until this is over? Who knows!

One other thing I do really want to know though, is can Dahlia Sin finally go home now? She was eliminated first, and instead of letting her go home to her loved ones for comfort, they said no, stay and wear this broccoli costume every week and we'll use you as a sight gag. Honestly, poor Dahlia. That's going to become her oppalance, her Miss Vanjie, her cucu.

[e-of-west-glendia]

Firelight & Firewhiskey

Imma give credit where credit is due bc I totally didn't come up with that title lol. So thankkkksss to @sirrriusblack for help with naming this thing. Okie story time now.

Remus walked up the stairs to Gryffindor tower. Well, less walked and more dragged himself. He'd just finished his Prefect rounds and he was absolutely exhausted. In general, it wasn't the most grueling of days, but anything can become tiresome when you're operating on three hours of sleep. Then of course, school itself is a mentally and emotionally exhausting thing. As he ascended Remus found himself wondering why their dorm had to be in a tower of all places. He found himself envying the Hufflepuff's and their basement dorms. Or even the Slytherin's in the dungeon, at least they didn't have to walk up this godforsaken staircase. 

Remus reached the top of the staircase and turned the corner. The portrait hole was in sight now. As he neared it, Remus realized that he didn't remember the password. Remus winced, he'd better remember it fast. He was in no mood to play guessing games with the Fat Lady, and he was fully prepared to fight the portrait for entrance to the common room. Although he wasn't quite sure how one goes about fighting a portrait. 

He'd reached the portrait hole now. The Fat Lady stared up at him, waiting for the password. 

Remus sighed, he figured he'd better guess. "Gillywater?"

The portrait swung open and Remus breathed a sigh of relief. He ducked into the portrait hole and the door swung shut behind him. The walk to the common room was a short one; but it was long enough for Remus to create and start worrying about his mental checklist of all the homework he had. 

The Gryffindor common room was quiet. Which was a feat in itself considering the type loud, stupidly-chivalrous people who made up the house. A bright orange fire was lit serving as the rooms heat and only light source. Despite the warmth a cold draft blew through the room. Sucking out bits of warm air and giving Remus a preview of the cold winter to come. Remus went to close to the window and he started as he noticed another person in his presence. 

Sirius was curled up on the couch, the firelight casting long shadows on his face. A bottle of firewhiskey sat on the table in front of him. 

"Sirius," Remus greeted. "You scared the shit out of me." 

Sirius grinned, it was a lazy and sedated smile. A far cry from his usual mischievous one. 

"Boo." 

Remus rolled his eyes at him. 

"What are you doing awake," Sirius asked, his words we slightly slurred. 

Remus shrugged. "Prefect rounds." 

Sirius hummed by way of answer. He reached for the bottle of firewhiskey and took a long drink. Remus crossed to the other end of the room to close the window. 

"Are you drunk?" Remus asked, although he was pretty sure he knew the answer already. 

Sirius said, "I'm moderately functional." 

Remus snorted as he shut the window. "I'll take that as a no, then."

Remus crossed back to Sirius and took a seat next to him, plucking the bottle out of his hand as he was about to take another drink. Sirius shot him a glare that would've made most people shrink but didn't phase Remus in the slightest. 

Instead he simply said, "Drinking is bad for you." 

Sirius laughed. "Try telling you that at last week's party." 

Remus shrugged, guilty as charged. 

"That was different."

"How?"

"Because I wasn't trying to drown my sorrows." 

Sirius' frown told Remus that he had hit home. His grey eyes had that fractured look that they got whenever he was upset. 

Sirius released a sigh and his whole frame slumped. Remus sat up straighter, his earlier fatigue wearing off.

"It's Regulus." 

Remus repressed his own sigh. Sirius' brother was one of the constant stress factors in his boyfriend's life. Sirius loved Regulus dearly and the cold, uncaring attitude that Regulus directed at him hit Sirius like a ton of bricks. 

"What about Regulus," Remus prompted. 

"Well that's just it," Sirius said.   "I don't know." 

Sirius ran his fingers through his hair, pulling frustratedly at the ink-black strands. 

"He won't talk to me, hell he won't even look at me. Anytime I go near him, he finds an excuse to go in the opposite direction. It's like I'm the wrong fucking end of a magnet or something, Re. I don't know what to do." 

Sirius closed his eyes and leaned back against the couch, letting his thoughts consume him. Remus just watched him in silence, hating seeing Sirius so frustrated and hating himself for not being able to do anything. 

After a long moment Sirius said, "I don't know, maybe I never should've left. Maybe I should've stayed stayed at home. Then I could've protected him longer - saved him. I managed to live with my family for fifteen years before I ran away. What was another year going to do to me?" 

Remus' face hardened, he grabbed Sirius' hands and tugged him up to look at him. 

"No," he said firmly. "You couldn't have stayed longer. I saw what that bitch did to you, Sirius, we all did. You spent your whole life protecting Regulus from them, constantly sacrificing yourself. Sirius, I don't want to think of what would've happened if you'd stayed a minute longer. God knows that if you tried to stick around for another year she would've killed you." 

Sirius flinched at Remus' bluntness. 

"Regulus loves you, I know that. He's just got an odd way of showing it. He'll come around, eventually. In the meantime you need to focus on you. You can finally breath now, Sirius. Let yourself, don't let Walburga win, not anymore - not again." 

Sirius nodded slowly. "Thanks, Re." 

Remus shrugged passively. "I was only reminding you of what you already know."

Sirius gave him a sideways grin. Then he leaned over and kissed Remus. When they finally broke apart Sirius leaned back against him, and Remus began to slowly card his fingers through Sirius' hair. 

"I think I want to go to sleep now." 

The slightly slurred words reminded Remus that Sirius wasn't at all sober. 

"Me too," Remus said.

Neither one of them moved, though. Both stayed where they were and they slowly fell asleep to the crackling of the fire and the warmth of each other. 

[thatbitchinsneakers]

The Bachelorette Season 16 Episode 1

Hi everyone and welcome to ThatBitchInSneakers! While my identity remains a secret (for now), my unfiltered opinions on the hilariously pathetic franchise that we all know as The Bachelor/Bachelorette most definitely do not . I'm just gonna cut the crap of introducing myself cause literally nobody cares so without further ado, here we go with Season 16 Episode 1 of The Bachelorette.

Before we begin, a preview for the season just came on and it was like "you'll finally get some clare-ification" and some other dumb sentence saying "clare-voyant" (as if any of the 18-25 year old girls who watch this show fucking know what that means?) and all i can say if thank god her name isn't something like hmm idk TAYSHIA ????? cause there simply won't be a single play on words for that one. Bravo to the ABC summer interns for coming up with those! 

This epsiode starts with Chris Harrison "surprising" Clare over Facetime telling her that she's the new bachelorette. Like she totally didn't see this coming even though she had her hair and makeup done and a full blown camera crew in her bedroom. Such a shock for Clare! 

Ok, so she talks a lot about how her life/filming was flipped upside down because of this little thing going on in the world called a fucking pandemic. She's like "what should I do today? Should I get out of bed?" Like don't you have a full time job? Oh wait jk you take take instagram pics from home, I forgot. 

She gets covid tested, thank you ABC, and is free to go makeout with tons of random men! Yay Clare! Chris Harrison delivering her test results had me WHEEZING. Like legally, how is allowed to give her her test results? Can he deliver my results? What about HIPPA? so many questions. not enough time. Moving on. 

Some of the men are introduced and we find out that ABC spends a fuck load of money to put them up in their own rooms at a hotel in La Quinta, California (like sorry Clare the mansion is only reserved for people in their 20s) giving her, and all the men, free covid tests. Lucky them! I had to pay $250 for a rapid covid test so fuck u ABC. Anyway, the men are bored out of their minds in their hotel rooms working out, jacking off (probably), and flexing their muscles in the mirror. 

Clare arrived to the mansion in a dress that looks similar to what I wore to my bat mitzvah (although the backless was a nice touch, Clare) and she sits down with her personal therapist, Chris Harrison, and we find out about her past relationships/500 times being on the show.  Blah blah blah Chris Harrison legit does not give one fuck.

More men are introduced as they walk out of the limo to meet Clare and I'm honestly so impressed at how closely ABC and the NFL worked this season! Every other man on this show a former football player. Sorry to the "account executives" but you guys are outnumbered :/ Maybe next year!

Let's talk about the men.

First on my list of men to talk about is Eazy. He's fucking hot but like...Eazy? "Hi mom and dad this is my new boyfriend, Eazy. With a Z!" Mmm no sorry not gonna work. But tbh he should be the next bachelor because there are so many ways for the ABC interns to incorperate his name into the previews. "This next season is NOT gonna be Eazy" or "These girls are all so Eazy" idk just to name a few.

Jason, former football player, shows up pregnant! Haha! Good one, Jordan! Next.

Ivan gets out of the limo with some inspiring words from his mother, "Maganda ka" in Tagalog, which does actually mean "you are beautiful" (yes I looked it up cause I don't believe anything that comes out of a man's mouth these days). Points for you Ivan!

Kenny - boy band manager. Would absolutely love to know what boy band he could possibly manage. 

Tyler C - Not the Tyler C I'm used to but whatever. Obsessed with the fact that the producers were like hey Tyler come here so we're gonna put you in a shitty little station wagon with a suitcase and a single lamp tied to the top and you're gonna pretend like you "packed up your entire life" to come here for Clare. Ok cool thanks! Quirky entrance #1- check! 

Of course right after Tyler shows up in a disgusting station wagon, someone HAD to roll up in a Rolls Royce. Oh and guess who it is! That's right. The guy who went to Harvard! I wonder how long it's gonna take for him to mention that he went to Harvard. My guess is next episode.

Let's talk about some of the other entrances - Straight jacket? Full suit of armor? Like what drugs were these producers taking when they were like oh here's a great idea lets put a man in a straight jacket and then have him pretend he's here for love! Dumb. 

Ok so then she meets Dale and her 39 year old ovaries literally explode. I don't blame her though because he's really hot but like relax bitch theres 30 other guys here trying to get into your pants like give it a sec. Obvi Chris Harrison comes out and is like "omg did you just say you think you met your husband? Wow in my 568 years of doing this show, I've never heard anyone say that so quickly." Clare, just breaking Bachelor records all around!

So now we're in the fake mansion, the drinks are flowing, Clare is having weird convos etc. This is usually the best part of the Bachelor/Bachelorette because everyone is literally so fucked up because they're drinking, for free, for like 8 hours straight. There's always random fights and people rolling their eyes and what not. But I was so disappointed that the only thing that happened was that one guy was like DMing randoms saying "hey beautiful" or whatever. before the show started filming. Like who cares ? Get over it. Clare sat them both down and was like ok figure it out my 39 year old uterus does not have any more time to waste.

I did love how Blake messaged her before the show being like "I'm here for you" because that's actually so sweet. Like to know that he did that when cameras weren't filming and reached out to her on insta to say he's excited for this to be over so he can meet her and he's here for her while she's going through shit is actually so sweet. If she doesn't keep Blake then I'm suing the Bachelor franchise.

Blah blah blah nothing else exciting. Dale gets the first impression rose, obvi, and then she ends up keeping the man who was DMing the girls before filming. Yosef, who she has already nicknamed "Yo". Then the rose ceremony which is literally at 9am the next day like the sun is fully up. 

To sum up this episode, I'd say it fucking sucked. This doesn't feel like the normal Bachelor/Bachelorette at all. Idk if it's the fact that Clare is 100 years old and not the usual girl that is fresh out of college and a self proclaimed Instagram model, but it just doesn't feel right. 

Can't say I'm looking forward to it, but see yall next week!

Kisses,

That Bitch In Sneakers

Official "I love that" count: 9

Official "I needed this" count: 6