#and then the moment his siblings are involved he becomes a chaotic little shit

[incorrect-mighty-nein]

Caleb: remember Duck Duck Goose? If that wasn’t the most anxiety inducing game ever, then I don’t know what was

Fjord: Musical Chairs?

Caduceus: No, Musical Chairs was a battle to the death. That game was training us for the Hunger Games.

Caduceus: my sister once shoved me to the floor screaming “THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE VICTOR, GET OFF MY CHAIR BITCH”

The Nein:

Beau: damn, your family is brutal

Caduceus, shrugging: it’s just siblings being siblings

[lindsayrps]

john patrick "jp" townsend, base chaplain, thirty

does jp have some level of religious trauma? probably.

jp would like to believe that the formative years of his childhood were not at all spent in a cult-like situation but, honestly, they probably were. let’s back up.

jp was born and raised in boston, massachussetts as one of several in a large family. the family home was cramped and chaotic and busy and jp just kind of went along with all of it. what else was he supposed to do?

officialy, when asked, the townsends claim they’re episcopalian when it comes to religion, abroad they’d be considered anglican but if you asked jp, in the here and now, he’d probably say they were far more aligned with catholicism than anyone ever cared to admit.

(why? fuck if he knows, man.)

a lot of jp’s childhood was spent in church or in service of the church. his mother started working at the church as a secretary and his father found work in an adjacent career. it was hard to not be indoctrinated into believing the church was the be all, end all for the way jp should live his life. as a quiet, somewhat introspective child, he didn’t question much and often just went along with what everyone else was doing and if he didn’t, it was hard to question his parents because weren’t they supposed to know what was best for him? it stressed him out with how much emphasis they'd put on this part of their lives, especially as he got older, but again, those are his parents, why would he question them?

this all culminated in his decision to go to seminary school when he’d graduated from high school and led him to berkeley divinity school in new haven, connecticut. it may have only been a handful of hours away from boston but it felt like a breath of fresh air, in a way. jp was free from his siblings, his parents and everything that life entailed in boston. in new haven, he was a little more free to be whoever he wanted to be, within reason, of course, because it wasn't as if he was going to go off the rails.

divinity school comes and goes. he spends most of the 1930s working towards becoming a chaplain instead of a priest because he’s got no desire to lead a church or spend much of his time within the walls of a church. simply put, jp put in all that work towards something he’s not even entirely sure he wants to pursue in the long term but did because he didn't know what else to do.

but then war happens and damn if he doesn’t feel the need to do something like everyone else. he already knows he’s too thin and wirey to be in the actual army, probably can’t fly a plane worth shit and being a marine just sounds like torture so the chaplain corps it is. initially, he gets sent to an auxiliary surgical group and spends much of the first year of us involvement embedded with them in italy and the mediterranean theatre.

it’s…a lot, honestly. he’s nothing more than a spiritual advisor, someone who prays with those who need it and gives last rites when he has to and, if he hates anything about what he does, he hates that. it’d be no better asking for a transfer to a base somewhere, he figures, but he does it anyways and they send him to thorpe abbotts in the spring of 1943. for a while, he’s lulled into believing things will be fine and then…well, there’s bremen. and regensburg. and munster. and he’s no better off here than there.

the war has only served to turn a crack into a chasm when it comes to the disconnect that jp feels with his religion. there can't be some divine higher power and all of it can't mean shit in the long run when people are brutalizing each other like this. he was never naive enough to believe that the world was a perfect utopia where nothing ever went wrong but come on.

for a chaplain, he's probably the exact person you want--he's quiet, introspective, a listener, a calming moment in a storm of everything else.

outside of that he's a little more complicated and more obviously it's the war of jp the person vs jp the chaplain. he'll drink and smoke at times, but avoid it at others, flirt with the ladies one day but not the next. not unexpectedly, perhaps, he's got a dark sense of humour and can dish it just as well as he takes it.

better with conversations vs small talk, has a not small collection of books with him, is probably tired 75% of the time.

man's just trying to figure out where he'll fit when this is all over and he's pretty sure it's not in the church or boston.

[arty-shadow-morningstar]

Graveyard Siblings (5)

[Masterlink] (PART 1) (PART 4)

-----

Mari and Cass sometimes switch their suits as they have the same body type. Cass would sometimes go out in full Hellbat gear and give the appearance that Hellbat is out more often than she actually is.

So Orphan/Black Bat also sometimes uses guns.

This also helps with concealing secret identities. Maria was rescued by Hellbat from Joker’s Henchmen. (Vicki Vale was getting sus of the new Wayne and Hellbat.)

Unfortunately since Hellbat rarely comes out and she had already made all of her appearance for the month and it wasn’t a busy weekend, the public had come to the conclusion that Hellbat has a crush on the newest Wayne.

Basically everyone thought that Mari has a crush on herself. Which led to some teasing and escalated to Mari announcing that Jason had a crush on Red Hood on live TV.

It didn’t help that a video of Red Hood and Jason re-enacting Romeo and Juliet with Jason on his apartment balcony and Red Hood on the roof was posted on the internet a few days later. (Thank you, Trixx and Tim’s awesome video editing skills)

Sadly, it was taken down 24 hours later. (Tim and the others have multiple copies of it, on the cloud or hardware, hidden around in the manor and their respective safehouses in the US.)

Some people kidnapped Jason to hopefully gain leverage over the Red Hood and to their dismay and nightmares for years to come, Hellbat came instead.

One lucky and incredibly brave reporter asked why she was there instead of her brother.

Mari being a little shit, “Red Hood may be a tough and scary guy but when it comes to his feelings, my brother is a chicken.”

Pictures of Jason tackling Hellbat somehow never made it into any papers.

The criminal underworld hasn’t taken a hint and Jason has been kidnapped a few more times.

Other times Jason was kidnapped:

Robin: Red Hood made a fool of himself in front of Todd recently and he doesn’t dare to show his face.

Spoiler: He was taking too damn long checking his hair even though I told him that no one was going to see it under his helmet and he was so offended that he is currently sulking in the bathroom.

Red Robin: Red Hood can’t think straight when he is around Jason. I mean have you seen the dude.

Arsenal*during a rare visit to Gotham*: Red Hood owes me one now.

Dick finally ends it by going out as Red Hood and rescuing Jason. Gotham is happy that Redson (Red Hood x Jason) ship has finally sailed.

-------

Kate, Babs, Cass, Steph and Mari were out on Mari’s first girls’ night since her move to the manor.

This is set a little after she came back from Paris with Jason.

They watched rom-com movies, did hair and nails, gossip about the superhero community and bitch and vent to each other.

Marinette off-handedly mentioned the crazy shits she had done during her stint as Ladybug. It started with asking about the T-rex in the Batcave and she mentions jumping into the mouth of a live one before.

Everyone in the room was shocked and after a few more questions, it was obvious that she was very reckless and self-sacrificing. Yep, she was going to fit into this crazy family just fine.

And Holy Shit. There is so much trauma packed into this kid. She needs lots of therapy.

Babs finally decided that they all needed to get out and have some fun. All in their respective suits and they went out.

Joined by Harley, Ivy and Selina.

Plagg came along because I want Plagg to meet Selina.

It was a chaotic night and it was a miracle that Bruce didn’t find out about what the girls did.

-------

Batman and Red Hood were on patrol together when Selina jumped in front of them.

“Hello, Boys”

“What do you want, Catwoman?”

“I want to meet my new prodigy, Kitty Noire.”

Cue Marinette jumping down from her hiding spot, transformed with the Black Cat Miraculous. “Hiya.”

Red Hood carries her like a potato sack and points his gun at the other two.

“Nope, she’s my sister and I called dibs. I adopted her. She’s off limits.”

“Legally, she’s mine.” Batman coughed out.

“I did it first. Emotionally. She’s my emotional support sister. You have plenty kids already, B and Selina, get your own.”

“Hey, I am still here and can hear you.”- Maria

-------

Alya was worried for Lila. She had been acting weirdly for the past month.

She looked very out of sorts. Her clothes weren’t in order and her hair was in disarray. She had bags under her eyes and her eyes looked wild. Lila didn’t look like herself at all.

She jumped at any sound and flinched at really sudden movements.

Alya tried to find out what was wrong with Lila and received vague answers.

One time Lila said that Marinette is to blame.

Alya reaches the somewhat right conclusion that Marinette was haunting Lila and hurting her because Lila used to come to school with bruises and claims that Marinette did it.

Alya goes to Marinette’s grave to desecrate it. (Yeah, go anger the ghost that is haunting someone.)

Unfortunately, the moment she tries to do something, the sky turns dark, clouds appear and the wind begins whipping. A Lightning strike near her and there was a cloaked figure beside her with a scythe.

All Alya saw from the figure was the blood-red lips in a very sharp grin and glowing blue eyes, raising the scythe high before she ran away. The scythe swiped the air where her head once was.

Alya didn’t get far before she tripped and blacked out.

When she woke up, she found herself in the hospital with no idea how she got there.

She was told that somebody found her with a concussion in the park and took her to the hospital.

------

The next one on Mari’s hit list was Natalie.

She wasn’t as involved in the whole thing like Lila, Adrien or Gabriel but she still did it anyways.

Her punishment is a little mild compared to the others and was more of a warning to Gabriel.

Natalie woke up in the middle of the night to see a not-so-dead Ladybug sitting on her vanity chair with the moonlight from the windows illuminating her body and her neck. Her suit was torn exactly like the day of that battle with blood dripping down her arms and from her open wounds. The shadows kept her face hidden but glowing blue eyes stared at her.

Natalie was scared at first. But she regained her normal cool composure.

“I assume you are here to extract your revenge for aiding in your unfortunate demise. But before you kill me, I regret my part in my entire thing and I apologize for everything I have done against you even though I knew it was wrong.”

“At least you show remorse over what you have done. Visiting my grave when even my parents didn’t and leaving flowers. I love those purple hyacinths by the way. Did you know that they mean sorry in the language of the flowers?”

“Why are you stalling my death? Just kill me already.”

“Madam Sancouer. You just played a minor role in my downfall compared to what Adrien and Lila Rossi did to me. And you showed more guilt over your actions than they ever did and Adrien claimed to have loved me. And like I have told the Bats, Death is too swift of a punishment.”

“Who are the bats?”

“None of your concern. You should be more concerned about yourself.”

“Lila sees the ghosts of her past and they haunt her. Adrien is in a living nightmare and has no control over his actions and is despised by everyone. What are you going to do to me?”

“Well, since you show some guilt over your actions, let me tell you a little secret. I am not dead. Not really. I mean I did die. But there was a spell in the grimoire that revived me. It took a few days to work.”

Marinette changed to her normal form. It was a little jarring to see an older Marinette Dupain-Cheng sitting on her vanity chair like it was a throne. The Ladybug suit and the wounds were gone. She looked a little familiar.

“Why are you telling me this? What was the point?” Natalie faltered as she wondered why the girl looked familiar. Marinette moved closer and her face was fully illuminated by the moonlight.

“I intend to take everything by which I mean everything from Gabriel Agreste for what he did.”

“M. Agreste just wanted his wife back. You just gave him your Miraculous, you would still have everything.”

“What difference would it make? Sure I had friends and family before but they turned out to be disappointing. I might have become a famous designer like I dreamed of and can't achieve because I died. Besides, he never said about wanting his wife to come back in his tedious monologues. For all we knew back then, he wanted them for world domination. He showed that he would end the world for them. For kwamis’ sake, he nearly started World War III, just for a pair of earring and a ring. He was willing to kill me to have her back. No wait, he did that too. If he actually read the translated grimoire or asked the Guardian or at least someone with magic for help instead or maybe used his head and made some who can heal as his champion using the Butterfly, we wouldn’t even be in this mess. Face it, Mme Sancour, your boss is a power-hungry and very controlling maniac who is also thankfully an idiot.”

“But- he- he just-. You are just a child, what do you know? M. Agreste knew what he was doing.”

“A child who had a normal life up until he tried to ruin it with his idiotic schemes and hiring Lila to do it. A child who had to fight a war on her own.”

“I am sorry you had to go through that but I doubt you and your little revenge rampage is going to solve anything.”

Ghostly Chains wrapped around Natalie’s body, squeezing tight like it was squeezing the life out of her.

“I was all for sparing you, you know. If you had actually listened to my side of the story, you would have spared from my ‘little revenge rampage’. This is going to be a little painful. Sorry about that.” In a tone that was definitely not sorry.

Pain coursed through Natalie’s body. Her skin crawled and itched as pitch back feathers grew out of it. Her bones turned to dust and reformed.

Where Natalie Sancour once was, there was a raven.

An omen of death and destruction for one Gabriel Agreste.

Marinette leaned down towards the raven. Natalie tried to peck her eye out but Marinette held the beak in a firm grip.

“Ah. ah ah. Luckily for you this is temporary. Mostly. Every night, you will assume this shape and each night the longer you will stay in this form. Slowly counting down the days until Gabriel’s downfall. Since you love helping him so much, you are going to help him know how long he has to live. The night you are a raven from sunset to sunrise, that sunrise starts the day Gabriel Agreste will be utterly destroyed.”

She released the beak and headed towards the window.

"Send him my regards."

With that, she was gone.

(Part 6)

[dinthehottotty]

Little Secrets - Din Djarin Drabble

Summary: Kagra and Cara find out that Din's actually married and it raises some questions.

Warnings: Fluff, mentions of child bearing, political marriage, bad mother-daughter relations mentioned, mostly just a little crack fic, underage marriage - there is no sex with this. Married for tax benefits. Friends that happen to be married.

"I'm sorry, what!? Repeat that, I must have rocks in my ears. Did you just say you're married to Mando?"

"Huh? Yeah, you didn't know?" You reply to Cara.

"NO?" She cries. "Mando? Why?" You crack a smile and shrug at her.

"Political marriage. My people support the Mandalorian's now." Her jaw drops open and she sits back to absorb in her desk chair.

"I don't believe you," she snaps.

"Okay, you're entitled to that," you agree and continue your knitting project. The silence stretches on again and then she leans in.

"Why wouldn't he tell us?"

"What information about himself does he freely give, Cara?"

"Fair point. How long have you been married, then?"

"Nine years."

"Nine!?" She gasps. She sits forward and you glance up to meet her eyes. "Have you two ever... ya know?"

"Slept together?" She nods.

"No. I was sixteen. That'd be gross."

"YOU GOT MARRIED AT SIXTEEN?" She hisses.

"Political."

"Were you allowed any say in it?"

"I proposed it. Initially, he turned it down for obvious reasons." Cara leans back in her seat quietly, mulling over as you continue to knit, unphased.

"You're so convincing, but I want to say he would never." She sighs, shaking her head. You grin mischievously at her.

"Ask me anything," you challenge.

"Why not get divorced?"

"Neither culture believes in it."

"Why did you want to?" She demands.

"My culture favors honorable warriors. As eldest daughter, I raised most of my siblings, I didn't care if I had kids or not and marrying him gave me the opportunity to explore the galaxy unhindered. No kids. No nagging husband. My parents approved it. It works." You meet her eyes for a long stare. She's trying to call your bluff, you just smile.

"I don't believe it."

"Again. That's fine." You return to you knitting once more but it's only moments before Din and Kagra enter. "Is that your final answer, Dune?" You taunt with a chaotic grin.

"Ohhh? Do we have a bet going?" Kagra calls.

Cara mulls for a moment. "Final answer. She says she and Mando are married, I say they aren't. I bet ten credits." You watch Din's visor shoot towards you and you share your grin with him.

"Married?" Kagra calls.

"She put up a convincing arguement."

"I'm with Cara. There's no way." Din responds before you do.

"You're a little shit, Cyar'ika." It makes you grin. "Pay up. We're married."

"WHAT!?" They both call in utter distress.

"THIS WHOLE TIME! YOU'VE SERIOUSLY BEEN MARRIED!?" Cara shouts. "NINE YEARS? YOU MARRIED A SIXTEEN YEAR OLD!" Kagra rounds at that.

"It was a political marriage! He's never laid hands on me, sit your ass down," you shun with the wave of your hand.

"Nine years?" Kagra mutters.

"You don't even know how old I am," Din mutters.

"How old are you?"

"That's not the point." You snort at your husband's answer and continue.

"I told you, I felt romantic tension between them." Kagra's tort has you bewilder as you and Din shoot each other looks.

"Not romantic-" you both start and then are cut off by lifted eyebrows.

"You're married, there's no shame in being in love with each other."

"Uh, no no no." You stand, gesturing with your hand. "Nope. No romance. Big no."

"You're denying that pretty hard," Cara offers. "That's suspicious."

"It's because of the clause," Din explains, he shifts his weight onto his hip and sighs dramatically. "Although it's political, there is a clause put in place by her mother." You give a hefty groan as your friends exchange intrigued glances. "If we ever become romantically involved we are required to... have and raise children on her home planet and he mother has rights to them."

"Well that doesn't sound too bad."

"I made a vow," you urge.

"What vow?" You groan, tilting your head back.

"My mother likes to override all of my decisions, okay? Also I'd have to take over her seat and rule over the kingdom. Less time for kids. I vowed not to have any because she thinks she's got a claim in how they're raised and that's not the case. She had me raise half my siblings and then undermined me the whole time. It's bad."

"How bad?"

"Bad." Din's blunt answer startles them.

"So no romance, got it?"

"Got it."

"Good, now pay up."

Taglist: @awhiskeywithawinchester, @lxdyred, @boliv-jenta, @amidjarin, @qhbr2013, @buckybarneshairpullingkink

[voltagesmutter]

Satan x MC - Public.

Pairing: Satan x MC (F).

Fandom: Obey Me.

Prompt:  Asphyxiation || Orgasm Denial || Public

Warning: Warning: Public sex, mutual pining, vaginal sex, hand-job, fingering, talks of masterbation, angry Satan.

Day 2 of Kinktober event/prompt list.

Amazing thank you to @crystal13unny for being my beta 💛

Mid-terms were looming and overstressed didn’t come close to explaining how everyone felt. Whilst life was normally chaotic amongst demons, this way beyond words due to how dysfunctional life had become. Mammon had been “retail therapy” shopping so much that goldie broke, Asmo repainted his nails at least four times a day, while Leviathan's beloved console was becoming dusty with neglect. All because Lucifer was bringing forth tenfold his normal strictness to ensure revisions happened, causing tension to run through the household.

Beel was stress eating, which meant consuming triple what he normally ate, hardly leaving anything in the fridge. To say Lucifer lost his shit would be an understatement. He was livid causing sparks of arguments to fly across the house of Lamentation. Of course as soon he started, Satan retaliated as he always did. 

“Will you be considerate for just once and not eat us out of food!” Slamming the fridge shut, his red eyes pulsing with anger, “Shouldn’t you be studying rather than indulging in your gluttonous ‘habits’,”. It was asked as a question but meant clearly as a statement.

“Lay off him Lucifer! You know how he gets around exams,” The blonde rolling his eyes at Lucifer's comment, the others around him on the table all going silent, eyes falling upon him before darting back to Lucifer for his response. 

“Don’t you start getting involved Satan, keep your nose out where it doesn’t belong,”.

“Doesn’t belong? You're openly yelling at Beel for something he can’t help, just back off Lucifer, I am sick of you breathing down everyone’s necks!” the sound of Satan's fist slamming down on the oak table range clearly through the air. The tension was thick in the room, one wrong move and it would set alight, causing a blaze to rupture in the household. All it took was a tutt and snide remark from Lucifer before Satan dashed across the room and pinned him against the kitchen counter, fists balled up in a firm grasp with the material of the eldest shirt.

“Another word Lucifer and I swear,” Satan hissed, his normal soft demeanour now lost in a sea of wrath. Green eyes normally the colour of soft apple candy now shone dark with tinges of yellow, the iced-cold anger behind them enough to make any human freeze and shiver with fear. Lucifer was no human and went unfazed at the younger's outburst, simply pushing him off him with a, “If you cared this much as your midterms rather than your dopey siblings you could actually pass them with a decent grade,”.  

It took the strength of Leviathan and Mammon, quickly running from the table to grip Satan to stop him from swinging at Lucifer. A simple tut, a wave of his hand and a “childish,” was all he left them with before exiting. 

“I’ll kill him, I’ll actually fucking kill him,” Satan screamed, chest heaving up and down as the others tried to calm him down. 

“Who we killing?” A young girl came strolling into the kitchen, yawning as she did, stretching her arms above her head causing her shirt to slide up and expose her stomach slightly. 

“Morning cutie!” Asmo rushed to her side, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her with him back to the table. 

“Lucifer,” Belphine huffed, head resting upon the table with his eyes shut. 

“Oh I’m in,” Reaching for for a slice of toast only to out it back when she saw a scorpion tale sticking out of the crust, demon food was just not her thing, “He’s been on my case for the last few weeks, I’ve hardly had any time to myself because of his schedule he’s made for me,” her eyes fell to Satan who was still heaving in the corner, before swapping a confused expression with Levi. Levi touched the tip of his nose twice, a signal between the pair to indicate an argument had/or was about to break out. 

“You okay there?” She asked, standing up and walking a few paces forward to lean against the counter, meeting Satan’s eyes.

“Yeah just old bossy arse ruining everything as usual,” He murmured, breath finally calm. 

“Don’t let him wind you up, you know he gets a kick out of seeing you so angry,” She lent over and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. A shared look amongst the other brothers and just as Mammon was about to protest the gesture, Levithan stamped on his foot to keep him quiet. 

There was something between the two, they were the best of friends, anyone and everyone could see that. It was also apparent the sexual tension that lingered between the two, slowly building up, waiting to overspill. While they loved each other as friends, certain feelings now occurred between them. He found himself rather embarrassed at fisting his cock to the thought of her nearly every night, whilst she let his name slip between her lips when her vibrator brought her to orgasm. Neither knowing or revealing how they felt for the sake of their friendship. As if too blind to recognise their feelings for each other. 

“So what was he going off about this morning?” She asked the room, going into the fridge and opening a cartoon of juice.

“Beel’s eating,” Levithan answered, watching as Beel was still moping in the corner of the room, kicking fallen debris on the floor with a huff. 

“Oh Beelze! Are you stressing eating again?” She asked, feeling sympathy for him, she did for all of them. Whilst they were demons, they had no control over their powers, each of them having their own individual quirks tied to their demonic power. 

“Yeah-” sulked from the red-head in the corner, scuffing his shoes along the floor. 

“Oh honey I’m sorry,” She took a sip out of the juice she’d poured into a clean cup, “I mean he cancelled my date for me for the other day, deemed it as not suitable time for doing my studying,”. 

The word ‘date’ made Satan’s ears prick up, he repeated the word out loud causing everyone to turn to him. 

“Hmm, with one of them cutie players from Beel’s team I do believe,” Asmo chimed in, causing a blush to grace the girls cheeks, “Muscular, tall, handsome, a little dim-witted but still!”. 

A string of curses falls from Satan’s mouth, pushing his brothers off of him, a ‘this day keeps getting fucking better’ is all he says before storming out of the room. The slam of the door is enough to signal his departure.

“What's wrong with him?” She questioned, watching how the brothers all turned to each other before her slowly.

“Isn’t it obvious? He l-” Mammon rolls his eyes with a tut but if cut off by Asmo jumping in, “He’s just stressed sweetie, he’s probably gone up to the library so why don’t you go check on him for us,”. Asmo doesn’t take a second for her response, taking the cup out of her hand and putting it down, practically shoving her out of the room. “But Asmo I!” But her protests are cut short as he shuts the door behind her. 

“You!” He hisses to Mammon who blinks in confusion.

“The fuck did I do? I can’t help that Satan is too much of a pussy to admit his feelings, The Great Mammon would never chicken out like that,”. 

“Shut up Mammon, you big idiot, let Satan tell her himself,” Levi added, the group of remaining brothers now sitting around the table. 

“You think she likes him back?” Beel asked, causing a snort from Asmo.

“Please! Have you seen the way she stares at him? I also know about her little nightly activities,” He sings in a sickly song, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Asmo the fuck that’s gross. I didn’t need to know they were fucking, no wonder he was upset she had a date,” Belphegor sighed, throwing a book at him.

“Oh sweetie no, they’ve not done it yet, but the way she says his name at night she definitely wants too,”.

“How do you even know that?”.

“I’m the avatar of lust sweetie,” Asmo rolls his eyes and flicks his wrist with annoyance at even having to state it, “Plus her room is next to mine and the other night there was definitely a ‘Satan’ slipped between them plump lips after a good ten-minutes of buzzing,”.

“Stupid human, should be thinking of me instead of him,” Mammon pouted, crossing his arms infront him as he sulked like a child.

“Lets just hope the pair admit how they feel,” Levi stated, each of the brothers secretly praying for their brother.

-

Asmo’s hunch was right, the young girl found Satan angrily moping on the first floor of the library within the house. He had his back against the wooden bookcase sat on the floor, book in lap but little attention being paid to it.

“Hey,” She smiled, taking a few steps forward waiting for his response. He grunted, trying to bury himself in the book without looking up at her. 

“Can I sit?”.

“Free place isn’t it,” he responded, flicking the page as she sat beside him, outstretched legs touching.

They sat in for a few moments in silence, Satan still pretending to be studying in his book until he finally broke it.

“So your date,” Finally closing the book and turning to her, “You never said anything,”.

“I,” Her face was blushing slightly, “I wasn’t really into him but I just, I felt too nice to say no,”. Her confession made them both laugh, finally breaking the tension between them. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I didn’t know how you would react,”.

“Me? What does it matter what I think?”.

“Your my best friend, your opinion matters the most,” She whispers, reaching between them and finding his hand, their fingers intertwining like they so often did especially when they sat in bed watching movies on a Friday night. 

It took a few minutes again before Satan spoke up, “I’m glad you didn’t go,”. 

“Oh?��� He squeezed her hand, “I didn’t want to go anyway, I think he only asked because he overheard Beel teasing me about my lack of sex life,” she snorted a little with laughter, “I haven’t had sex since living in the human world. Do you know how long ago that was?” Her following words sending the demons cheeks a light pink, “I mean girls have needs too but I think Lucifer kind of got a whiff of why he wanted to take me out and well…”.

He knew exactly how many months to the exact day since she’d entered the Lamentation household, the shining ball of light that was herself weaving her way into all of their lives. How long it had been to even the touch of another person because the minute she walked into his life it lit a carnal desire which only she could quench. 

“I mean it’s been the same for me,” He laughs.

“Yeah, why is that? I always see the girls throwing themselves at you, you don’t seem that phased though?” She asked.

“I have my eye on someone else,” He rubbed his thumb over hers in a soft manner, “Someone important,”.

They shared a glance, the avatar of wrath melting into her eyes as if trying to convey the words he couldn't say out loud. Hers mirroring as she softly whispered his name.

“Satan I-...,” She started a waver in her voice, the feeling mutual for Satan to her. Both of them leaning until they were an eye-lash apart, her eyes slowly closing as Satan swallowed with an anxious breath.

It was unsure who started it but they kissed with a passion, tongues meeting in a sloppy exchange as he pulled her into his lap to straddle him. Both of them indulged in a feeling that this was right, that it was meant to be. Her hands fisted into his hair, both of them groaning as he held her waist whilst she subtly began to grind on him. 

“Is this okay?” He groaned against her lips as he unbuttoned her shirt slowly, just enough to cup her breast beneath it, thumbs tugging down the material of her bra to let her perky breasts stand free. His fingers rolling her nipples in his hands causing her to grind harder against him, heat pooling inside her stomach as her panties grew wetter by the second. 

“Yes, fuck Satan, yes don’t stop,” She replied, inhailing sharply as he pressed kisses to her neck, a trail leading down until his mouth latched over her breast.

Neither of them wanted to stop, losing themselves in the embrace of one another. When his hand skirted up her thigh beneath her skirt to rub against the wet patch of her panties she moaned his name, causing him to still for a second before continuing, the breathless way she called it made his cock stand solid. A moan he’d imagined thousands of times in his head, but none of it compared to the real thing. 

She popped the buttons on his jeans, palming his erection beneath the fabric before tugging them down just enough with his boxers for his cock to spring free. Her eyes widened as she marvelled at it, delicately taking it in the palm of her hand, his leaking head oozing wetness onto her skin.

“L-Like that,” Satan encouraged her after a few strokes, his mind fogging over at her movements. He let out a low groan against her neck, almost forgetting his brothers were only a few doors down from them and that they risked any one of the walking in.

“Your so wet,” His hand snaking beneath her panties to rub his index finger against her wet folds, her hips bucking into his touch. 

“Only for you Satan,” She whimpered, back arching as he pushed a finger inside her tight, wet heat. A noise like no-other left his lips as her walls gripped around his digit, pushing out to thrust back in until the grip around him loosened and he sped up his movements.

“Satan, I- more please,” Mouth formed in a delicate ‘o’ as two of his fingers worked inside her, knuckle deep and dripping with arousal. Her hand tightly around his cock, jerking it slowly as they both moaned into others mouths. Both eyes brimmed with lust, neither of them wanting to part from one and other for even a second.

“I can’t, I haven’t got a condom,” He swallowed, he may have one in his room but the thought of stopping now to search for one was too much. Even if she came around his fingers whilst he came on her hand, it would at least be enough to satisfy the need until they could be protected.

“I’m on,” Pressing her lips to his, pulling his hand away from her as she lined herself over his cock, “Birth control”. 

“Are you sure- fuck,” He groaned so loud the bookcase behind him trembled, the warmth of her tight walls stretching over him send his head flying backwards. It was unknown who said it, but a breathless ‘fuck’ was whispered as she lowered slowly over him. Satan pressing gentle kisses to her lips as she rose up before lowering back down, inching him further into her with each movement. She took a few moments to roll her hips slowly, Satan’s hands cupping her ass to help her down until he was fully hilted inside her. 

“Your perfect, so perfect,” Satan repeated over and over in a loving tone as her forehead pressed against his, slowly grinding movements of her hips in tightly circles.

Small rolls of her hips as his hands delicately ran from the curve of her ass to the smooth of her waist beneath her skirt, the sheer wetness dripping from her coaxing over his balls. The pit of her stomach dropped, mouth opening as her eyes expanded, the head of his cock rolling perfectly against her g-spot with each movement causing her to rock directly against that spot. His lips moved from hers, to her neck, moving down slightly to capture a nipple in his mouth as she moaned louder. He had to bite back the chuckle inside him to think for sure his brothers would hear them, but in this moment all he could focus on was the tight-heat eloping over his cock in gyrating movements. That he was claiming her, that she was his human. Heat pulsed throughout her body, feeling no shame at the sudden happening of her orgasm building. 

“I'm gonna cum, Satan, I’m gonna-” Fingernails digging into the soft green of his sweater, lips parted with her head tossed back, cheeks dusted a heavy pink as the tension in her stomach rose higher and higher. Satan’s hands working her hips, letting her move at her own leisure as she brought herself to the edge of climax, ready to be pushed off it. His vision was lost in her beauty, admiring each and every thing about her, how she was physically and mentally taking the air out of his lungs as her walls tightened over him. She came crying out his name, unable to hold back, an orgasm with the intensity like none before she had experienced. Drool pooled out the corner of her mouth, hands grasped onto him to keep her grounded as her vision flooded white, Satan’s hands pulling her down to be fully impaled by him as her walls flexed over his cock. Her sweating forehead pressed against his, rapid breaths falling from her mouth as she came down from her high, Satan groaning as her walls slowly stopped withering around him.

“Satan I lo-,” And just as she opened her eyes, they heard it from outside, Asmo screaming out.

“Lucifer don’t-!”. 

“I’m sorry,” Satan whispered, cupping her face as he pushed her off of him. The whimper she made broke his heart but he threw her behind the bookshelf, hissing at the loss of her warmth over him and the tightness of his jeans over his still solid cock as he tucked himself back in just in time for the door to burst open.

“Where is she!” Lucifer raging across the room in demon form, black onyx horns pulsing and Satan swore he could see steam coming out of his nose. “The fuck is she Satan!”.

“I don’t know what you mean, I’m simply revising as you told me too,” Satan peers up from the book he had tugged into his lap, although his sweating face, ruffled hair and panting breath was enough to signal otherwise. The heavy smell of sex dominating the aroma of the dusty library.

“Don’t play coy. I heard you down the corridor! You vile creature, tainting her like that, you should be ashamed Sata-” Lucifer barks but is stopped. Satan growled, anger controlling him as his demon form takes over, standing and pinning Lucifer against the wall as if he was merely as light as a book.

“I might not be good enough for her,” He hisses, tinged eyes pulsing with anger, “But I fucking love her, you have no right Lucifer, no right. Just because you can’t have her doesn’t mean you can control her,”. He gives a dark chuckle, smirking to see Lucifer's face fluster, “Yeah that’s what I thought, that's why you want us all to study, so you can keep her all to yourself but guess what Lucifer,”. Satan peered into his eyes before moving his hold to choke Lucifer, leaning to the side of him as he whispered in his ear, “It was my cock she was just coming over,” The whimper from Lucifer made Satan smug with pride, “So I suggest you leave, unless you want to watch me fuck her... Oh how glorious that would be seeing you wishing, no, lusting to be me as I drive my cock into her tight walls, for only me to ever do so. She’s my human Lucifer, mine,”. He lets out a cheshire grin before releasing his hold on Lucifer, watching him choke a few breaths before turning on his heels and leaving, his pride purely kicked to the curb. 

“Are you okay?” Satan turned back around, running to the bookcase where he had pushed the girl off, watching her nod from behind where she was hiding. “I’m so sorry you had to see that,” He whispered, cradling her in his arms, the moments of darkness passing as fast as it came, she bringing out the best and light out from inside him. 

“It’s okay, really I’m just glad he came in then and not when- you know, I guess we were a little loud,” She smiled with a light blush, her askew clothes now fixed, “Did you mean what you said… about Lucifer liking me…?”. 

“You can’t tell? That’s why he’s kept us all ‘studying’ to keep us away from you,” Satan tucking a strand of stray hair behind her ear.

“I didn’t realise, I mean- I didn’t realise you liked me either so,” A nervous laughter followed.

“All my brothers like you,” Cupping her face in his palm and stroking her lip with his thumb, “But I-... I love you,”. 

“I love you too Satan,” She whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down to kiss her. The kiss quickly deepend, the couple picking up their previous rhythm before being interrupted before she pulled away. Satan frightened he had scared her with his actions to Lucifer.

“Do you-” Twirling her index finger along his chest, hiding her face in a bashful manner, “Do you think that… we could finish this in your room?”.

“Of course, we don’t have to continue if you're uncomfortable,” Pressing a kiss to her forehead, a softer side of Satan that only she would ever get to see.

“No no!” She quickly added, “It’s just- Lucifer's room is next door and I- well, you know, I feel we owe him a little revenge for the past few weeks… and as well,”. Her hand moved down to cup his still hard cock through his jeans, “You didn’t get to finish,”.

“You are perfect, you know that?” Satan laughed, cupping her face again and kissing her nose.

“Um as well,”.

“Yes?”.

“Do you think the whole wall pinning and choking… we could-maybe-try it?” Her face burning red as Satan felt his cock twitch, the horns on the side of his that had subsided as his anger calmed now re-appeared but this time for lust, not anger. 

“Fuck me you’re so fucking perfect,” He mumbled once more, picking her up in his arms with her legs around his waist as he kissed her deeply, carrying her from the library to his room. 

Kinktober masterlist here.

[hopeswriting]

KHR x The Umbrella Academy AU

I need to get this out of my system before I think too much about it and want to write an actual story about it lol. With the Arco as MCs because I’m very predictable. TUA spoilers.

Words: 2579

Kawahira is Reginald because who else he’d be.

Every generation he gathers the most powerful extraordinary kids to make sure there will still be a world come next generation for him to do it again.

The current Arcobaleno he gathered are, well, the Arcobaleno lol.

Maybe there are the ones who’ll be smart enough to find another way around the Tri-ni-sette that doesn’t involve human sacrifices too, or strong enough to fight back against him and not let him kill them even if it means the world burns, or even strong enough to straight up kill him and put him out of his misery.

A dead man can’t be blamed to not give a shit about the end of the world after all or make it his problem.

(Well, this went dark real quick lmao.)

But why does he give a shit while he lives you ask?

He met this one human that one time and love sure has a way to make you care like the dumbest of humans.

(Yes I’m talking about Sepira.)

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An Anti Tri-ni-sette Movement is born in this generation only, but not so much because of the whole human sacrifices thing mind you.

By design they just so happen to actively trying to prevent it, but they don’t care enough to come up with an alternative to stop the apocalypse.

Not that stopping the apocalypse was ever their end goal because yeah, it’s Byakuran and his Guardians that lead the movement, and Byakuran would just like to say if Kawahira wanted the most powerful extraordinary kids, he was right there.

Also playing the anti-hero (when he’s actually a chaotic neutral bad guy lol) sounded like a lot of fun.

------

The Commission is also still a thing because, well, someone still has to keep track and protect the timelines, right?

And as I’m writing this I realize it would have make more sense to have Kawahira leading it, or even Byakuran, but whatever.

Among their many assassins there’s this one elite squad the Commission tries very hard to keep them out of the field as much as possible (and fails), because they always need to send others agents after them to sort through their collateral damage and actually keep the timelines as they should be.

Yes I’m talking about the Varia.

Byakuran is very acquainted with them (both the Varia and the Commission), because they keep trying (and failing) to kill him.

Because Byakuran keeps using his power whatever the way he fucking wants, even while being very much aware of how timelines work.

Because of course he is lol.

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Reborn and Verde are number one and two respectively, and always butt heads.

Not because of jealousy or because Kawahira trying to pit them against each other works on them or anything like that, they just infuriate each other at a very deep level lol.

Especially because they recognize (and begrudgingly admire/respect/trust) each other’s respective strengths.

They just don’t agree/approve on how the other uses them.

(Does Reborn need to be such a huge show off all the time? Being confident in his strengths enough to play with his enemies before winning against them is one thing, showing all his cards for the world to see just so he can win against them after they tried their hardest to defeat him is just incredibly stupid.)

(Does Verde have to be so straightforward and play by the book every time? Being the smartest in the room is one thing, walking out of the room alive because of it is another one entirely.)

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A mission goes wrong and Reborn is dying, so Kawahira injects him with the Deus Ex Machina whatever-it- is, and he gains super healing.

And the super villains and every day villains are in for an entirely new level of Reborn wiping the floor with them lol.

(And yesI know, I’m shallow, but come on Reborn is too pretty to become half-ape, half-human.)

Reborn doesn’t go on the moon.

(They all turn eighteen and Kawahira isn’t even allowed to breathe in their direction anymore, let alone send them on the fucking moon.)

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Fon is number three.

I have this headcanon he’s a bit of a manipulator, and uses his nice guy persona to wrap people around his finger.

Or he can be anyway, but it isn’t nowhere near in the first options he considers, because I also headcanon he’s genuinely a nice guy.

Anyway he doesn’t exactly hate his power, but he doesn’t trust it himself for shit, and wants to rely on it as little as possible.

So he also ends up a martial artist in this universe, and a very quiet guy.

(He remembers all too clearly what kind of words he can speak while under emotional stress.)

(The awful, horrible, haunting feeling of realizing even he can’t take them back.)

(Lal remembers it too.)

(Then Kawahira makes it so everyone forgets.)

(And Fon makes himself forget.)

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Colonnello is number four.

Yeah I know, it could be Skull, but let’s go with him.

Reborn is number one but it’s Colonnello who’s daddy’s good little soldier boy.

For a very simple logic that goes like this: the more he behaves, the better he is at being and doing whatever Kawahira wants, the less traumatic encounters with his power he’s forced to have.

(Colonnello was never afraid of the dark, but then he’s thrown into the mausoleum again and again, and he never stops being afraid of the dark.)

So he doesn’t turn to drugs because he can’t afford to not be at the top of his game, but he does turn to Lal and her music.

If he closes his eyes and listens hard enough and it’s loud enough, he forgets the ghosts for as long as the music goes on.

------

On the other hand he can’t help having a bit of one-sided strained relationship with Reborn, with a lot more resentment than he’d want.

(Meaning zero because in an ideal world they’re best friends, and it’s really easy to tell the rare times when Kawahira isn’t looming above their relationship.)

It’s not even like he can’t see where Reborn is coming from, taking a stand against Kawahira and defying them and crossing the line further and further each time (of course he does), but he really could do without the collective punishment.

All in all, number four is doing very good, while Colonnello is doing very bad, and maybe does become an addict as soon as he doesn’t have to play superhero anymore.

------

Viper is number five.

They’re very happy with their teleportation power, and is right there with Colonnello in being daddy’s obedient child until they can hightail it the hell out of there.

Kawahira is very invested in their training and making them take the next big step with their powers.

Viper is smart so they know of the possibility of them being able to time-travel, but no surrogate A+ parenting dad is getting them in no time-travel shenanigans, nu-uh, they don’t think so.

 But then a mission goes wrong, and instead of the little jump back a few minutes in time they wanted to do, they jump in the future.

They keep jumping in the future as they try to go back, and oh, look at this, the end of the fucking world.

And his siblings’ dead bodies.

And a very alive, adult Skull??

(This is such a relief.)

(Skull is so happy to see them again.)

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Something goes wrong when they try to jump back to the present, and only Viper makes it back.

In their thirteen year old body, because stopping a goddamned apocalypse isn’t enough to deal with already.

Their siblings are useless and no help and broken and very traumatized dysfunctional adults and alive, and they’re so, so happy to see them again.

(If they tear up and cry a bit later when they’re alone, that’s no one business.)

They hug (only) Skull, to no one surprise, and keep hugging, which does surprise everyone, and Skull may have written that book but he’s no monster and it’s Viper, so he hugs back.

(Of course he does.)

Viper still doesn’t know he’s immortal.

(Because Skull is a dumbass and kept waiting for the right moment, and what do you know, it never showed up, but to be fair with him they had a lot to deal with.)

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No number six even though I do like the Ben, and dead!Ben, and ghost!Ben storylines.

But it there was a number six, I guess it could be either Skull or Viper maybe?

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Luce is number seven as in she’s the most OP of them all. Not in a “raw strength” sense of course, but seeing the future?

I think Byakuran demonstrated perfectly how OP a power it is if you’re willing to weaponized it.

She doesn’t see the end of the world coming (where would be the fun if she did?), or at least doesn’t understand it’s the end of the world she’s seeing, and not just some big scale catastrophe.

She is not daddy’s good girl even though he shows a particular interest in her power, but he can go fuck himself actually.

She’s a bit of a number four too as in she hates her power, and it certainly gives her her fair share of nightmares.

It’s a special kind of gut wrenching feeling to see when and how people will die, and not always being able to save them even if she wants to.

(Nothing terrifies Luce more than when she sees her siblings in her visions.)

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Skull is also number seven as in he’s the ordinary one who’s actually the most extraordinary of them all.

They just never figure out he’s immortal because Kawahira doesn’t push them that far in training, and he doesn’t go on missions.

He’s shunned and isolated by everyone, except for Viper and, hear me out, Luce.

Viper is afraid of heights, and maybe it shouldn’t matter because of the “jump” way their teleportation works, but sue them it does and they can’t help it.

Skull is the only one who takes the time to help them with that in another way that isn’t telling them to get over it, or making them dangling over edges.

Their friendship starts from there.

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Luce on the other hand approaches him for selfish reasons.

Skull is the safe sibling, the one if she were ever to see his death, she can only hope it won’t be a too brutal one (or a brutal one at all).

But then, well. Skull is Skull, and he’s fun to be around with and funny, and he’s so good at keeping you out of your own head and thoughts, and he is such a breath of fresh air from her usual, unbearable routine, and—

He’s better than her at keeping his resentment and envy of her extraordinariness at bay than she is at doing the same with his ordinariness, and she’s so grateful he doesn’t push her away for it.

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Skull is still very much treated like dirt, and he rolls with it as best he can.

Mostly because being left out of this whole extraordinary superheroes stuff lets him see how truly fucked up it is.

Skull is the one who wakes up at night not because he can’t sleep, but because the others can’t, and they don’t always manage to be silent about it.

He’s the one who sees them coming back from missions injured like no children should ever be, who assists Kawahira during their training and has to help them up at the end of it because they can’t move anymore.

He’s the one who watches them never really growing close with each other as much as he is the only one shunned, because Kawahira only has enough favors in him for only one of them.

Except he doesn’t even have that of course.

Skull is the only one who hasn’t blood on his hands, and he always feels guilty and awful at how relieved and lucky he feels whenever he sees that look in their eyes.

So he rolls with it, but not quietly, and forcefully makes himself a place among them even if it’s only to be their Lackey, because these guys are in dire need of ordinariness, no matter what Kawahira made them believe.

No matter what Kawahira made him believe.

It doesn’t work a lot of times, and only work a little when it does, but it’ll have to do.

Skull of course still hurts and is forced into his own traumatic childhood, so he still writes the book.

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Skull figures out he’s immortal as soon as he’s left alone into adulthood because he is a dumbass.

The others learn about it because Luce saw the vision of his first death, and they were quite literally there to stop it from happening.

But instead they saw him coming back to life.

They don’t talk about it.

(None of them are in the right head space to talk about it).

And then they’re back at having no contact between them until the next time Luce has a vision of his death.

(Because he’s immortal now, but what if he’s not anymore?)

(Skull is so sorry of this new layer of fucked up he added to Luce’s visions.)

It’s very awkward when Viper comes back and tells them Skull is the only one who survived the apocalypse though they don’t know how, and they have to break the news to them.

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Lal is also number seven as in she’s the one being medicated to keep her powers at bay.

She’s The White Violin, if only because one of them needs the raw strength and ability in their power to blow up the moon lol.

Lal is extraordinary until she isn’t.

She’s thirteen, and the mission goes wrong, and she’s losing control of her powers, and Fon says some unfortunate words.

Then Kawahira makes him say other unfortunate words, and Lal never has been extraordinary.

(Because she’s too powerful, and he’s trying to keep the world turning, not end it whenever she’ll feel too strongly too much.)

Her relationships with the others kind of fall short because it kind of feels hollow/shallow now, and she ends up isolated too.

But because of their respective unique circumstances, Skull and her unfortunately never bond.

Colonnello and her stays close, because if Lal can be useful with her music that way, she’s more than happy to do it.

And on an entirely unrelated note, I really like the idea of musician!Lal actually.

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Sepira is Mom.

Yeah I know, the similarities with Luce would be very obvious, but let’s pretend it wouldn’t be.

And they don’t have a chimpanzee uncle, but they do have pets from that one time they gang together against Kawahira.

But they never said what kind of pets they wanted to have lol.

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So it goes something like this:

Number One: Reborn – Super Strength and Super Healing

Number Two: Verde – Either The Smartest Man In The World or controlling the trajectory of weapons (while still being the smartest man in the world even if it isn’t in the “super” way), or both

Number Three: Fon – The Rumor

Number Four: Colonnello – The Seance

Number Five: Viper – The Child

Number Six: Luce – The Prophetess

Number Seven: Lal – The White Violin The (Extra)Ordinary One

Number Eight: Skull – The Immortal The Ordinary One

*

I actually have AUs of this AU, but let’s not make myself too comfortable in this hole lol. Hope you enjoyed it, and feel free to add!

[shyrose57]

Brothers anon, hope your doing well! 

1: Ran feels the same both before and after Ran forgave Ranbob. He cant help but feel guilty and tends to avoid bringing up past memories incase Ranbob doesnt remember them, cause he can't stand to see the confused look in Ranbobs eyes that soon turn to one full of sadness and a sort of emptiness. It makes Ran feel awful. It also causes Ran to think that their childhood and old relationship is gone. Which particularly keeps Ran distant from his brother, because he's scared and doesn't want to redo everything if Ranbob will just forget it.

8: All of the above. Cletus is a chaotic shit that loves creating and hearing about anything chaotic. Also he has burned down a few things in the past so he is a bit of a anarchist. They just had those cards, after all they knew they where gonna travel for a bit so why not bring playing cards to try to provide entertainment?

11: I forget if I said that (if I did then I changed it) but Ranbob actually knows that Ran is most likely dead as he wouldn't survive the night, but he still has some hope that his little brother survived.

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3: It was scary for him but because of the sudden turn of events he didn't really have time to register his feelings before he was getting smacked around and blinded. And yes cause Ran deserves a overprotective arc to show him that his group does love and care for him even if he thinks otherwise.

10: The townspeople act rationally to defend themselves. Even if that means they start fights because their not being respectful or kind. 

11: I'm not sure what they are. All I know is their the parent figure of the friend group but will also bite your ankles at a moments notice just because they want too.

14: Or Foolish just punts Jackie into the sand to protect his home from a possibility destructive teen. (I'm thinking yes to both of those, and we get to see one of the siblings embrace their enderside and just go crazy on Raq which leads to murder and trauma!)

15: For the cursing one I just love to imagine something like. 

Ranbob: *accidentally knocks over a stack of books* Shit!

Baby Ran: Shit!

Ranbob: *freezes and turns to look at Ran*

Baby Ran: *innocently smiling* Shit!

Ranbob: rAN NO--

(I've decided the group for this is going to be Technoblade, Phil, Ranboo, Tubbo, Karl, and Sapnap, and I may name the sub au like Brothers + Others cause it rhymes and I find it slightly funny). Oh Foolish is going to be terrified and scared for his safety, he's gonna have two hyper active teens climbing him like he's a jungle gym. Ran didnt want to help at first because he was to suspicious of them, but when proof was provided he changed his mind, and decided to take a risk to help them, but he still doesn't trust them fully. Plus, he felt bad after hearing their story, and couldn't help but sympathize with them because he felt that lost and confused at one time, and its a awful feeling. And while he won't admit it, he's curious about Ranboo and wants to talk to and get to know Technoblade, after all he did choose Techno as his idol. When the group first visited Kelalen, they got the Orphan Slayer as a gift, and because they did express some interests in going back to Mizu to see what they can do about Dream, so they got it to help them. So when Technoblade shows off his Orphan Slayer as possible proof, Watson brings out the groups Orphan Slayer and the two exact duplicate swords (expect for some nics on the GF group's sword) take most by surprise, and serve as some proof. Ranboo brings up his memory book, and since Ranbob read a bit of it, the two are able to perfectly recite a page of the book. And Karls watch, book he has of both Mizu and the Pit, and his knowledge about all groups are also proof. But even after proof the GF group is still somewhat suspicious that their who they say they are, but eventually they come to fully believe them. Ranbob is in awe. Because his ancestor is in front of him! He can ask questions he had about the history of the SMP and finally get answers! But he is also scared, because why is his dead ancestor here? Why are there so many others? What does this mean for him? Theres so much uncertainty that its hard for him to relax. The enderman hybrids get along well enough, but since Ranbob is a anxious mess, Ranboo is also an anxious and nervous mess, and Ran is bad with emotions, they dont get along super well. Tubbo and Jackie get along well and love to share stories about their respective enderman friend. Sapnap, Cletus, and Grievous get along well and even with Sapnaps current predicament, he still joins in with jokes and pranks. Karl, Phil, Isaac, Watson, and Benjamin get along very well with their habit of leading and taking care of their friends, and because their the ones planning what to do with everything going on. Technoblade doesn't really get along super well with anyone from the GF group, but he takes an interest in Ran and Watson. Only Technoblade, Tubbo, and Phil are Ranboos haunting. Ranboo tries to get close to his decedents, and he success in some places but fails in others. The time group doesn't know about Ranbobs possession, purely because Ranbob begs his group to not tell them. But the time group also suspects that something is up, and while Sapnap and Techno want to push to find out what it is but they dont because Phil yells at them. For the fighting, Phil and Ranboo want to help but are told not too for now. Saying them intervening could make things worse. So they don't. But Ranboo breaks the rule cause he cant stand hearing the two fight anymore. 

Hi, and same to you!

1: Oh, ouch. The way you phrased it, he thinks Ranbob could still forget? Does Ran not know Dream caused it?

8: FGHJK-Anon. Anon. Hearing Cletus was a bit of an anarchist, just, made my day. Holy heck. Can you imagine Quackity’s reaction to hearing that? Oh my god, that’d be so funny. 

The cards are the only game they brought? Sounds like it might get boring quick. And a bored group makes for a chaotic one.

11: Ah, so it was a hope thing. Hm. I don’t think I’ve asked before- feel free to correct me if I have-, but, if Ranbob thought Ran was dead, how did he feel upon finding out he was alive-especially considering the circumstances.

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3: Poor Ran. But also, yes! Overprotective arc! Let everyone go feral for the dude who’s always ready to do the same for them.

10: Hmm.

11(?): They...sound...interesting??? Honestly, I don’t think that answer settled my nerves at all, but y’know what, none of my business. The gremlin friend is whatever they are, and I will not question it further. 

14: Jackie’s just getting tossed around everywhere, huh. First by Ran, then by Foolish, who’s next up to yeet the child? (Also, yay! Murder and trauma, always fun!)

15: Pfft, oh goodness. That must’ve been fun to explain to his parents. 

----------------

Hey, it does rhyme! Nice. 

Poor Foolish. He had a mostly nice life before Tubbo’s return, probably. Oh well. And Techno’s got a traumatized fan now, that’ll be interesting. What does he do with his new-old future sword? Duel wield? Let the GF group keep it? 

Two anxious endermen and one who’s bad with emotions, what emotional pain will they cause each other?

What kind of stories do Jackie and Tubbo share? Funny ones? Blackmail? 

Sapnap, Cletus, and Grievous sound like a terrifying force, and honestly, for the sake of everyone else, I hope a prank war never sparks between them and Tubbo and Jackie. 

Do the leaders of the group all kind of take charge together in light of this situation? In what ways does Ranboo succeed, and in what ways does he fail? How does Sapnap and Karl not being part of his haunting effect their relationship with the GF gang, considering they all are? Do they ever become part of a haunting?

Do they find out about the possession, and if so, reactions? What happens when Ranboo involves himself in the fighting? Does it get better, or worse?

[ripleyfm]

              ･ﾟ☀   good   morning   to   everyone   except   those   who   hate   on   legend   of   korra   !   skskskks   i’m   teddy   ,   i’m   a   lil   ole   baby   swinging   back   into   the   rpc   heart   emojis   a   -   blazing   !   this   is   my   lil   sunflower   chaos   seeker   known   as   ripley   ,   a   newer   muse   for   me   but   i’m   really   excited   to   flesh   her   out   here   with   some   extra   spooky   elements   .   i   have   a   god   awful   sense   of   humor   and   too   much   enthusiasm   for   angst   so   tbh   ?   come   get   y’all   PLOTTIN   JUICE   to   distract   me   from   thirsting   over   avatar   kyoshi   !  disc / ord is @𝐤𝐲𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐫 !#6439 since i’ll be mobile for the afternoon !

* [ bruna marquezine + cis female + she / her ] —— have you met tallulah ripley ? they are a twenty-two year old senior currently studying biology & music theory. they live on decker house, and word around campus is that this leo is vibrant + gregarious, as well as hedonistic + philophobic. i wonder if they’ll make it out alive. trailing sand in on the hardwood with bare feet , running late to meetings ( and asking forgiveness with a mere flash of a grin ) , tucking a greta van fleet album among the family collection of concierto classics .

EDIT : wanted and current connections can be found here ! 

youngest   of   four   ,   born   into   an   old   money   surname   ,   her   mother ,  an  international   student  from  sao  paolo  ,  brazil  ,  and  american   father   meet   as   competing   pianists   at   holloway   ,   falling   in   love   ,   marrying   ,   and   beginning   the   next   generation   of   the   ripley   virtuosos   soon   after   graduation   .   her   childhood   is   privileged   and   uneventful   ,   strict   and   stifling   as   early   as   she   can   remember   ,   tallulah   causing   trouble   enough   as   if   to   make   up   for   her   perfectly   behaved   siblings   .

her   father   becomes   one   of   the   most   prolific   modern   composers   of   his   time   ,   and   splits   his   efforts   between   composition   and   teaching   music   theory   at   julliard   as   his   wife   continues   performances   as   a   famed   pianist   .   though   her   siblings   branch   out   into   other   instruments   ,   tallulah   is   the   only   one   stubborn   enough   to   weather   the   callouses   on   her   fingers   ,   figuring   if   she’s   going   to   be   forced   to   play   an   instrument   of   any   type   ,   it’ll   at   least   be   something   she   likes   .   thus   ,   the   only   stringed   instrument   in   the   ripley   household   becomes   hers   as   she   takes   on   the   cello   by   storm   .

practicing   cello   is   perhaps   the   only   thing   lu   truly   commits   herself   to   —   charming   and   sociable   as   she   may   be   ,   her   selectiveness   with   her   efforts   makes   her   sluggish   with   schoolwork   as   if   to   give   her   family   a   hard   time   .   her   siblings   ,   all   honor   scholars   and   first   chairs   at   their   respective   instruments   ,   pick   on   her   for   her   unmotivated   wild   child   ways   at   the   encouragement   of   her   mother   .   the   only   person   who   takes   the   time   to   sit   with   tallulah   and   keep   her   on   track   is   her   ever   -   tired   (   but   endlessly   generous   )   father   .

her   world   is   turned   upside   down   her   freshman   year   when   her   father’s   occasional   stumble   turns   into   a   more   regular   struggle   to   keep   his   balance   ,   an   ultimate   diagnosis   of   a   degenerative   disease   rattling   their   family   as   they   know   it   .   tallulah   ,   wild   and   only   tamed   by   the   kindness   of   one   man   ,   starts   acting   out   in   an   effort   to   ignore   the   world   around   her   .   the   rift   between   herself   and   her   family   only   multiplies   when   she   discovers   her   mother   having   an   affair   as   her   father’s   health   continues   to   decline   .

he   passes   away   on   a   vacation   he   and   tallulah   take   to   the   ripley   summer   beach   house   ,   something   they   had   done   to   have   some   quiet   time   together   away   from   the   judgement   of   her   siblings   .   having   to   be   the   one   to   break   the   news   to   the   family   ,   she   feels   herself   shut   down   and   lose   whatever   desire   she   had   left   to   live   the   perfect   life   her   mother   and   siblings   tried   to   force   on   her   .

she   starts   going   almost   exclusively   by   her   surname   ,   making   it   into   holloway   more   as   a   favor   to   her   family’s   generous   donations   to   the   music   program   than   on   grades   .   she’s   barely   hanging   on   by   her   involvement   in   the   university’s   symphonic   orchestra   ,   where   she’s   a   first   chair   cellist   that   shows   up   late   to   every   damn   rehearsal   and   somehow   can   cold   sightread   well   enough   to   piss   everyone   off   ksksksk   .

given   this   ,   she’s   only   minoring   in   music   theory   to   stay   in   the   orchestra   ,   and   partially   to   feel   close   to   her   dad   .   though   her   dream   is   to   write   music   scores   for   films   ,   she’s   majoring   in   biology   to   have   a   respectable   backup   plan   .   if   she   can’t   do   music   forever   ,   she’ll   disappear   onto   a   beach   somewhere   in   costa   rica   and   be   a   marine   biologist   and   never   be   heard   from   again   lmao

PERSONALITY   :   ripley   is   happiest   shotgunning   a   white   claw   before   piling   into   the   squad   car   and   calling   aux   immediately   !   loves   her   friends   and   sees   her   circle   as   found   family   that   she   would   do   anything   for   .   

she’s   laid   back   and   observant   ,   one   of   the   quieter   in   the   group   as   she   tries   to   suss   you   out   but   is   the   first   to   approach   a   newbie   and   act   as   if   you’ve   been   friends   for   ages   .   she   makes   an   active   effort   to   not   judge   others   on   the   basis   of   first   impressions   and   tends   to   be   rather   open   minded   when   meeting   others   ,   which   makes   her   a   sort   of   universal   friend   -   to   -   all   ;   given   this   ,  when  wronged  ,  she’s   a   stubborn   little   shit   and   though   she   wont   let   them   live   rent   free   in   that   headspace   ,   she’ll   go   full   send   to   making   sure   they’re   aware   they   don’t   exist   to   her   !  

she   hates   petty   drama   and   tends   to   skirt   most   responsibility   by   sweet   -   talking   her   way   out   of   things   ,   giving   the   impression   that   she   can   be   lazy   or   unmotivated   .   this   is   true   to   some   extent   ,   such   as   with   her   grades   or   her   timeliness   ,   but   those   who   strike   the   right   balance   will   see   a   side   of   ripley   that   is   laser   focused   ,   whether   its   drunken   ramblings   about   the   brilliance   of   the   chord   progressions   on   fleetwood   mac’s   rumors   or   an   astute   observation   about   the   emotion   behind   a   certain   cello   movement   .   though   she   prefers   to   skip   the   hard   thinking   and   just   enjoy   the   moment   ,   ripley’s   admittedly   a   clever   girl   ,   simply   needing   the   right   push   to   unlock   her   truest   potential   .  

she’s   incredibly   relaxed   (   sometimes   a   bit   too   much   for   the   preference   of   some   )   and   tends   to   try   and   avoid   over   -   complicating   issues   in   order   to   not   have   to   face   them   .   especially   considering   the   infidelity   of   her   mother   ,   ripley   is   a   staunch   believer   that   relationships   are   a   waste   of   time   and   is   the   annoying   bitch   who   argues   that   being   in   love   is   a   scam   made   up   by   the   simps   to   feel   valid   !  

acts   as   if   she   isn’t   FULL   of   feelings   and   emotions   24/7   n   listens   to   emo   70’s   power   ballads   when   the   person   she   likes   doesnt   confess   their   love   for   her   under   the   moonlight   like   they   were   supposed   to   in   her   fantasy   …….   smh   .   she’s   too   busy   trying   to   be   ~cool   and   effortless~   that   she   sometimes   sabotages   the   things   that   would   bring   her   the   most   happiness   ,   then   blaming   herself   in   a   vicious   cycle   that   just   leaves   her   trying   to   distract   herself   w   crazy   antics   to   avoid   focusing   on   her   feelings   .

RANDOM BLURBS :    hates   men   n   regrets   all   attraction   to   them   .   thinks   all   women   r   too   good   for   her   .   convinced   she   will   be   a   useless   bisexual   forced   2   be   forever   alone

plays   guitar   as   a   mental   break   from   cello   and   loves   it   .   i’m   still   deciding   a   vc   for   her 

knows   the   beaches   in   maine   are   cold   af   but   wants   to   go   every   weekend   anyways

drives   the   most   impractical   soft   shell   jeep   which   sucks   in   the   east   coast   wind   and   snow   and   yet   it   is   somehow   exactly   an   embodiment   of   Her   Brand tm

like   5′9   tall   and   hates   wearing   real   people   shoes   she   said   berks   or   nOTHIN

wishes   she   could   go   vegan   but   is   so   bad   at   keeping   track   of   her   meals   she’d   forget   instantly   and   down   a   20   pack   of   chicken   nugget

too   mellow   &   apathetic   to   be   a   chaotic   neutral   but   too   adventurous   to   be   a   true   neutral   so   she   lives   somewhere   in   that   lawless   grey   space   skskskks

acts   REAL   california   for   someone   who   grew   up   exclusively   on   the   east   coast   ....   hm   .....   🤔

grew  up  disconnected  from  brazilian  culture  due  to  her  mom's  whitewashing  and  she  resents  it  greatly  .  can  understand  scattered  portuguese  but  took  spanish  in  high  school  so  that's  as  close  to  the  language  as  she'll  get  .  wants  to  take  lessons  online  tho  !

inspos r lila from umbrella academy , wynonna earp , beverly marsh from it , michelle manlon from derry girls , korra from lok , adora from she ra and the pop ,  and that ugly yellow overtone used in outer banks  💖 skskskks 

[michaelburnnham]

i know you wanna talk about the flying opera company give me your thoughts

as if you haven’t heard like half of what I’m gonna say already gndjabdjf

I will Try to make the order of this make sense but no promises

first thing’s first, lek’s death is fake canon. there, I said it

anyway

the flying opera company said found family RIGHTS and I love them for it

at the start with kyoshi and rangi join, they’re not super close with the company and stick with them out of necessity but then they Do become close

after the fight at the end of tsok, they’re all like “we need to see each other more” since the first time they were all together in two years was to fight yun

so they make an effort to spend more time together while balancing kyoshi dealing with Being The Avatar

publicly, they try to not to be considered kyoshi’s Team Avatar to try to give kyoshi some semblance of a decent reputation

the avatar shouldn’t be ~running around with daofei~ after all

though by the time tsok is over, it’s not like it actually matters given that kyoshi already has a negative reputation compared to other avatars (mostly yangchen here tbh)

it’s only really at rangi’s behest that they do this and give up on it

they don’t publicly broadcast it, but if someone was to mention that the avatar was involved with a group of daofei, well so what?

they’re not a 24/7 team but kyoshi will call them all to help on avatar business on occasion, where relevant

she may or may not stretch the definition of “relevant”

some official: do...these people....really need to be here?

kyoshi: yes [insert made up reason]

(the real reason is that she missed them since the last time they saw each other)

--

ok ok so the company, canonically, gives each other shit all the time

like in huijang where they’re telling kyoshi she needs to look tough/threatening “like rangi,” and rangi’s like “this is just my face??”

they’re the epitome of “I can give my family shit but if someone else tries to, I will kick their ass”

speaking of giving each other shit, well that “just two friends having a close, private moment of friendship” scene?

two takeaways:

the first is that kirima indeed finds ways to tease rangi and kyoshi about their relationship (within reason, because if she did it too much then she’d be an actual asshole about it)

her favorite, because it gets a rise out of rangi, is that rangi is shorter than kyoshi (as is the same for,,,most people), and she’ll make jokes about it

even though rangi is still taller than average, I imagine 5’10” or some shit,

(she still radiates “feisty/angry bc I’m close to hell aka short” energy so I’m gonna rationalize that as “it’s from kyoshi’s perspective so that’s how she’s short for this purpose)

[insert something about the height difference]

kirima, to rangi: “lol, shorty”

rangi: “kirima, I’m taller than you”

kirima: “and what about it?”

-

second takeaway: while kyoshi was worried about kirima and the rest of the company’s reaction to her and rangi being together, they were never gonna Care (and they didn’t)

awfully bold of kyoshi to assume that anyone in the flying opera company is a cishet

really, she just has horrible gaydar

absolutely terrible. she looked at kirima, who I think gives off the Most visual signals of queerness, and thought “Yep, that’s A Cishet”

hell, she didn’t even seem to pick up on rangi’s vibes despite being friends for so many years

rangi’s is a little better, which is why when kyoshi looks at her like “should I tell her we’re together now?” she nods because while she hasn’t figured out kirima’s exact vibes, she got Trustworthy And Maybe Queer Too vibes for sure

one time she recounts this to the rest of the company and they LOSE IT

wong, who’s usually a bit more stoic, absolutely busts out laughing

“you thought kirima was a straight woman?? you thought the rest of us were straight, too??”

they’re all surprised at the prospect, because they thought it was obvious enough that they’re all queer

kirima is actually kind of offended. they don’t put out Maximum queer vibes for this shit

this is the part where I insert specific headcanons

kyoshi: bi trans girl, she/her

rangi: gnc lesbian, she/her or he/him but mostly she/her

kirima: nb lesbian, she/her or they/them (the company defaults to they/them most of the time)

lek: trans boy, he/him

wong: cis gay, he/him

lao ge: too old for gender, any pronouns

I could honestly do a whole separate post on gnc rangi, but I’ll just throw in here that kirima helps her a bunch w/self-discovery I think

basically: rangi and kyoshi (esp kyoshi) are a couple of baby gays who joined a group of Elder Gays + lek (a baby trans kid) and didn’t even realize it for a hot second

-

i only have a bit on within-group dynamics but anyhow

kirima and wong are super close, I don’t have have any particular hcs for them except that they vibe well together

kyoshi and lek have a Peak obnoxious/lovingly antagonistic sibling relationship

in trok they don’t start off on good terms but they come to an understanding by the end of it

so instead of “I don’t like you go away” it’s more “I will act like I don’t like you but I actually really Care about you as my sibling”

you know that tweet that’s like “[at my sister’s wedding] wow, there really is someone for everyone”? lek at rangshi’s wedding

oh also, those two have big “this is my get along shirt” energy

wong and rangi are the most Responsible ones and the others are more chaotic (I was about to say kyoshi to a lesser degree than kirima, lek, and lao ge but then I remembered “kyoshi are you eating dirt” and nvm)

their brain cell total as a group is 5. wong has his own, rangi and kyoshi share one (rangi has the brain cell more often), kirima has one, and then they have a shared two

and that’s everything

[incomprehensiblelentils]

Lentils’ 2020 Christmas Movie Rankings

My wife and I watched a lot of Christmas movies this year, and I thought it would be fun to rank them based on which ones I think were most watchable and enjoyable. I’ve left out a few that we watched during this time period, which are classic Christmas movies (Miracle on 34th Street), action movies set at Christmas (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and Iron Man 3), or older romances set around Christmas (While You Were Sleeping and You’ve Got Mail), because it’s not fair to rank these amongst, well, some of the movies we saw.

my top 5, for those of you who don’t like reading (which is fair): The Princess Switch: Switched Again, Dashing in December, The Princess Switch, Jingle Jangle, Happiest Season.

my top 3 Chaotic Christmas Movies: A New York Christmas Wedding, 12 Pups of Christmas, The Princess Switch: Switched Again. Please watch these movies if you enjoy chaotic plots. Please especially watch the first two I listed because holy shit my summaries do not properly convey the chaos.

The Princess Switch: Switched Again (2020): Some people on the internet have been VERY RUDE about this movie and I’m sorry they don’t appreciate a true chaotic holiday gem when they see it. This movie involves two Vanessa Hudgenses, Scheduled Vanessa and Spontaneous Vanessa, who are distant cousins and not twins, switching places to try to facilitate Spontaneous Vanessa getting back together with her ex the baker, but Scheduled Vanessa is intercepted by a third cousin Vanessa, Horny Vanessa, who wants to take Spontaneous Vanessa’s place as queen. I don’t want to spoil anything that happens in this movie so that you can experience the batshittery for yourself, but I found every second absolutely delightful. It also has two very good romantic couples who are cute and who genuinely seem to like each other, which is not something I can say for every movie on this list!

Dashing in December (2020): This movie has gay cowboys, is set on a ranch, and features a squaredancing scene, so if that isn’t your bag, you are probably not going to like it very much. I found it deeply charming and the only reason it isn’t #1 is that three quarters of the way through, the lead suddenly turns back into a giant jerk for no real reason and that was very upsetting. But it all works out in the end. The main romance is very cute, there are horses, the horsemanship doesn’t totally suck ass, and there are some fun side characters. It’s not reinventing the wheel, but it’s pleasant.

The Princess Switch (2018): Again, some people are mean about this movie and they shouldn’t be because it is CUTE GODDAMMIT. It is absolutely The Prince and the Pauper but with two Vanessa Hudgenses, but also, it shows the aforementioned two good romantic couples falling in love and they are delightful. I am not saying this is a great masterpiece of romance, but the filmmakers actually tried to give these characters reasons to like each other, which, again, is not true for some of the movies on this list.\

Jingle Jangle (2020): I kind of feel bad putting this movie on the same list as TV movies that were obviously just shit out by Hallmark or whoever, because this clearly had a lot of love and heart put into it, and it really shows. I was so immediately charmed by this movie that I didn’t even mind when it immediately went in very silly directions. I don’t know if the plot makes sense at all (a cute robot shows up for seemingly no reason other than that cute robots are fun!) but it doesn’t have to, because everyone is having so much fun and there’s so much joy in this movie that I was just happy to be along for the ride. Also, I would love to see an entire movie in the stop-motion style from the opening scene.

Happiest Season (2020): I absolutely understand why some people didn’t like this movie, and I don’t want anyone to feel like they can’t dislike it, and also, it’s MY movie, and I love it, and I’m not interested in fighting about it. It helped me come out to my parents and also featured two of my faves kissing and that’s all I need. 

Noelle (2019): I was previously under the impression this movie was bad, and I don’t know why, because it’s a little embarrassing and cheesy at times, but it’s sweet. I suspect what will make or break it for you is if you like Anna Kendrick, and because I like Anna Kendrick, I like watching her play a neurotic Claus sibling trying desperately to fix the problem she accidentally caused. One weird thing though: this movie tried to convince me about halfway through that she was both spoiled and selfish, and I don’t actually think that’s true at all. I think she was a little naive and sheltered and wanted people to like her way too much, but she’s not really shown to be a selfish person - she’s constantly paying attention to other people in the real world and her brother is the one who refused to admit that he wasn’t cut out for the Santa gig and instead fucked off to “find himself” or whatever. It was weird! But anyway, I liked this movie a lot.

I’ll Be Home For Christmas (1998): So this movie...one Christmas Eve when I was in high school, I was having trouble falling asleep for whatever reason so I went downstairs to get some water. My mom happened to have the TV on and this movie was just starting, and she invited me to join her. Fun fact: this movie went to theaters and it stars Jonathan Taylor-Thomas and Jessica Biel. It is one of the dumbest movies I’ve ever seen in my life and at no point does anyone in it actually behave like a human being. It’s about a smooth-talking jackass who has to be bribed to come home for Christmas and then, after one of his dumbass moneymaking schemes lands him in hot water, he gets abandoned in the middle of the California desert wearing a Santa suit and glued-on beard. He then has to beg, lie, and cheat his way home for Christmas dinner so that his dad will give him a vintage Porsche they fixed up together. I have no defense for this character; he is insufferable and only becomes marginally less so by the end of the film. But also, I have to watch this movie every year (usually with my mom, although not this year for obvious reasons) or it doesn’t feel like Christmas. 

A Cinderella Story: Christmas Wish (2019): We own this on DVD and have seen it three times. In our defense, we wanted to support Gregg Sulkin from Runaways and Isabella Gomez from One Day at a Time, both of whom feature prominently in this movie, and also sing songs. This is just Cinderella But At Christmas, and if that doesn’t sound like fun to you, I don’t think anything I can say will change your mind. I will say that the songs are amusingly autotuned, there’s a disabled dog that’s very cute, and I personally think that the leads have slightly better chemistry than some of the pairs on this list. But it is literally just another Cinderella Story movie.

The Knight Before Christmas (2019): This movie is Thor (2011) But At Christmas, and it would have been slightly higher except I always forget about the plot where at the end the knight becomes a cop. Bad, obviously! But anyway, the plot of this movie is: nice but clueless dude crash-lands on Earth for Reasons and bumbles around trying to figure out what’s up, while falling in love with a nice lady. That’s just Thor and you know I’m right. And for as dumb as this movie is, at least it’s ambitious. I have learned that Christmas movies can do one of two things to please me: a) have actors that have decent chemistry and charm and are fully committed to whatever nonsense is going on, or b) have absolutely batshit chaotic plots. This movie is like a 4 out of 5 on the chaos scale and I like it a lot, besides the copaganda. I hope this also gets made into a trilogy and Cole isn’t a cop anymore.

A Christmas Prince 3: The Royal Baby (2019): I will get into my problems with the first two Christmas Prince movies later, but my main criticism is that they are kind of boring and not chaotic enough. This one decided to make up for that by incorporating a missing ancient treaty, a curse, and a ghost, as well as a subplot about Girl Power (I use this semi-ironically) and a subplot about cousin Simon potentially committing treason again. I was so excited that things were happening in this movie the first time I watched it that I may be a little biased, but oh well. Oh, I was also absolutely terrified it was going to be racist and it is...mostly not? There are a few questionable moments but like mostly it’s fine.

Christmas With the Prince (2018): I wanted to watch this because the summary on Netflix did not match the summary on Google at all, and that’s because, uh, they’re both sort of right? Ostensibly this movie is about a pediatric oncologist who comes back into contact with an old almost-flame, who just happens to be the prince of a tiny European country, because he fucked up his leg and needs somewhere private to stay. And apparently a pediatric oncology ward is the best place for that? But then after they fall in love this random Russian lady shows up and is like “that’s my fiance.” This happens maybe twenty minutes from the end. Anyway, this movie isn’t great but I liked the lead guy way more than I thought I would and it has some cute kids in it.

A New York Christmas Wedding (2020): I...am at a loss for words to describe this...motion picture. On the surface it is a cute idea: a young Black woman, Jennifer, is getting married to her boyfriend on Christmas Eve, but she’s given a chance by her guardian angel (stay with me) to go back in time and redo her life, after losing touch with her childhood best friend, Gabrielle, who she was always in love with but never confessed her feelings to. She wakes up in an alternate timeline, where she and Gabrielle have been together for years and her beloved father is still alive. Then the movie, uh...veers off into some very odd places! They go to their Catholic priest and ask him to marry them, and he is like “but the Bible” and they are like “but that’s bullshit” and he’s like “shrug” and then later during a sermon he’s like “actually that IS bullshit, everyone gay in this church come stand up here with me. We love you. Also we’re going to perform a wedding now” and then he marries Jennifer and Gabrielle. And then Jennifer’s angel shows up and is like “you have to choose between this life and your old life now” and then uh...I really hate to spoil this next thing. It is the weirdest choice I’ve ever seen a movie make and if you’re even the slightest bit interested in this movie, I think you should experience this plot point for yourself. I’m going to put the batshit spoiler in ROT13 in case you want to avoid spoiling yourself. (GJ: fhvpvqr) Wraavsre'f thneqvna natry erirnyf gung ur vf gur fba bs Tnoevryyr, jub va gur bevtvany gvzryvar tbg certanag nf n grra naq ure snzvyl frag ure gb n ahaarel. Fur zvfpneevrq naq fhofrdhragyl qvrq ol fhvpvqr. Uvf anzr vf Nmenry Tnovfba. Anyway, uh, this movie isn’t very good, unfortunately, the adult leads have no chemistry and Gabrielle’s adult self is actively unlikable (the teen versions of them are cute!), but I think it’s 1000% worth a watch for the sheer chaos of it all. I...recommend it for that, I guess? Oh, also there’s a sex scene that plays a slow sexy version of “O Christmas Tree” in the background and I felt like I was losing my mind. 

A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding (2018): As I said in my commentary on the third movie in this series, the worst sin this movie commits is being kind of boring. It also manages to make the romantic hero, Richard, even worse than in the first movie, where he was just kind of useless and petulant, because in this movie he is actively failing to do anything to revive the failing economy of his country. I have seen people complain that the prince in The Princess Switch and Cole in The Knight Before Christmas have no personalities; they are delightful compared to the wet paper bag of a man in this movie. Rose McIver is adorable and I don’t think any of this is her fault, she’s doing her best in these movies, but woof.

12 Pups of Christmas (2019): The Google summary of this movie, which we found on Hulu, is this: “Struggling to keep his dog GPS locator company afloat, Martin expects his new hire, Erin, to help him save the company and find homes for 12 puppies that were left behind after a photo shoot. As they work together, Erin and Martin begin to discover each other's positive qualities and find love just in time for the holidays.” My wife and I love dogs, so we put this on, expecting cute dogs. This movie contains approximately 80% chaos and 20% cute dogs. It opens with our heroine, a canine therapist, coming home from work to have dinner with her fiance and best friend. We find out that Erin and fiance are moving to California soon for her new job (they live in New York). Fast forward a few days to their courthouse wedding, at which point her fiance and best friend confess to having an affair, and she is dumped. Heartbroken, she moves to California alone, and ends up moving into the company-provided house. It is just a two-story house (??) that the CEO’s sister owns (???) and rents out to employees (????). Also Erin is, as the Google summary says, expected to come up with some grand idea to save the company. And there are 12 random puppies also. They are cute puppies. Oh, also Martin, the CEO of the dog collar company, hates dogs for some reason. Martin’s sister is aggressively friendly towards Erin in a way that I interpreted as sapphic. At one point, after they find a home for dog #3, Erin’s former BFF shows up on her doorstep (?????) begging to be let in. She insists that the fiance was also two-timing her, and she has proof that he had FIVE OTHER GIRLFRIENDS ALL AROUND THE COUNTRY - “that’s why he’s a traveling businessman”!!!! Erin never asks to see her proof, but I guess she believes her, because she lets her inside and then makes her take care of the remaining eight dogs out of spite. I guess they make up at some point. Anyway, somewhere in here Erin and Martin are starting to fall in love and also come up with a way to rebrand the business, so hooray for them. We also learn that the reason Martin hates dogs is that his beloved childhood dog, uh, ran away? Disappeared? Got eaten? He insists that “not knowing [what happened to him] was the worst part,” but I was out here expecting to see the child finding an actual dead dog like it’s John Wick or something so this was a little anticlimactic. They go on a business trip to New York talk with Important Japanese Investors, during which they fuck (it is? romantic? allegedly?), and then the morning of their meeting Erin’s shitty ex shows up in the hotel lobby to bother her. Martin decks him square in the face for not leaving her alone, and then someone calls the cops, because I guess this movie said ACAB, and both dudes get arrested and Erin has to do the presentation alone. And then in the last five minutes Martin gets out of jail and Erin says that she gave the presentation to the investors...in English, and their translator was twenty minutes late, and so the investors understood none of what she said. Thankfully we are spared actually seeing this “joke,” but they do play racist music over her explanation. Then Martin reconnects with his rich dad who bails out the company instead, and also he adopts the four remaining dogs. This movie was fucking bananas and very bad and I need more people to understand exactly how bad. Watch this movie.

A Nutcracker Christmas (2016): Amy Acker has two Christmas movies and this one seemed more palatable than Dear Santa, so here we are. I like to watch Amy Acker be cute and dance, and she has an adorable teenage niece in this movie that she’s helped raise. In this movie she’s a former ballet dancer whose sister (hilariously, one of the Wynonna Earp lesbians) died in a tragic car accident, and she never got to dance the part of the Sugarplum Fairy. Spoiler alert: she gets to by the end of the movie. Unfortunately the love interest is basically Satan incarnate and does not deserve her at all, so unless you like yelling at romantic leads I can’t really recommend it. 

Godmothered (2020): This movie is just, uh, Enchanted but worse, and also it should have been sapphic and it isn’t? Poor Jillian Bell is doing her best and is adorable, but it’s not enough to save this movie for me. If Disney were not cowards she would have fallen in love with single mom Isla Fisher. Oh, it also ends with the very white younger daughter doing a public cover of “Rise Up” by Andra Day that the audience joins in on, which, considering its use in the BLM movement the last couple years, felt, uh, not great to me.

A Christmas Prince (2017): It’s maybe not far to compare this to the rest of the Netflix Christmas Cinematic Universe, because it was the originator. But also, it’s pretty boring. Sorry. Simon, or Fiddles (Fake Hiddles/Tom Hiddleston) is the best character.

Married by Christmas (2016): Apparently an alternate title for this is The Engagement Clause, which is sort of funny. Anyway, this has Jes Macallan and we, being big fans of Legends of Tomorrow, lost our shit when we found this on Christmas Day and had to watch it. The plot is that Jes’ character runs the family business, but their shitty grandma died and left a clause in her will where the business goes to the husband of whichever granddaughter gets married first. You would think that Jes’ sister and her fiance would postpone their Christmas Eve wedding to give Jes time to set up some kind of platonic wedding for business purposes, since Jes’ entire life is this stupid business, but nope, they immediately turn into monsters who are determined to get their hands on the business for ???? reasons???? It’s not very good, as you can tell by how low it is on the list. Jes Macallan is not a convincing straight businesswoman. I wouldn’t even really enjoy this movie as an Avalance AU.

A Princess for Christmas (2011): Here we are, the worst one Christmas movie I watched this year. I don’t actively harbor any ill will towards Katie McGrath, although I confess to feeling a bit “her?” but it’s fine. I was hoping this movie would enlighten me to her appeal. Instead, this movie actively got on my nerves in multiple ways, including trying to pass Katie McGrath off as a normal American retail worker instead of an Irish vampire/sorceress/supervillain/fairy/whatever she is. Her accent is shockingly awful, which I’m not sure is actually her fault, is there a reason her family wasn’t just British? That wouldn’t have saved the movie but it would have made it just slightly more palatable. At every turn it makes the worst choices, including a scene where Katie’s character puts on a rap song and she and the prince dance to it in an attempt to show them “loosening up,” and then the mean grandfather comes in and demands that they “turn this ghetto music off.” YIKES. I know these movies are the whitest movies ever by design but was that racism necessary? The only Black people I actually saw in this movie were some of the servants, I think? Speaking of the servants, at the end of the movie there’s a grand ball and Katie’s dress gets fucked up, and she’s about to leave the country, and then the servants are like “don’t go! We pooled our money to buy you another nice dress!” which, also yikes! This movie has a real classism problem. It also was so boring I zoned out of it multiple times, and I have sat through Manos: The Hands of Fate and Birdemic multiple times. This movie has no chaos whatsoever and I hated all the characters. 0/10 do not recommend under any circumstances.

[oswaldsirius]

Once in a Lifetime

Chapter Twelve

Pairing: Leonardo/Arabella

Word Count: 2652

-

           Pausing as she heard noises from downstairs, Arabella kept completely still as she listened. What was that? It was too early for Leonardo to be here so who-A strangled gasp left her as she recognised the presence that washed over her and she tore out of her room.

           “Don’t run on the stairs!”

           Ignoring Emil’s shout, she continued to run and skidded across the foyer as Louis closed the door. “Carmella!” she cried, throwing herself at her sister.

           “Ciao, Belli bean,” Carmella murmured, easily catching her and pulling her close.

           Arabella sighed as her perfume filled her senses and cuddled further into her. It had been too long since she’d actually seen her sister. Even though Carmella had been in Rome for years, the times they’d met had been so few. There was only so many time her brothers could sneak her out without their mother becoming aware of what they were doing and trips to Rome weren’t a possibility.

           Carmella squeezed her before gently pushing her back. “You look awfully dressed up for not knowing I was coming.”

           She pushed her lightly. “I have another date with Leonardo.”

           “Another?”

           Arabella gave her a look. “Why say it like that? Am I not allowed to go on dates with him?”

           “I didn’t say that, Arabella. You can go on as many dates as you like. But you aren’t tired of the old vampire yet?”

           “You’re the same age!”

           “We age differently,” Carmella dismissed with a sniff.

           “You do not!”

           “Stop!” Emil said firmly. “You aren’t starting that now when she’s only gotten here.”

           “Start what, Emil?” Carmella asked.

           “Leave her be. She’s having fun with her boyfriend. Let her have that.”

           Arabella’s gut lurched at the word. Boyfriend? They hadn’t really talked about what they were. What they wanted to be sure, but they hadn’t attached a name to what they were. They’d been going on dates for over a month now so were they official? Were they a proper couple?

           They certainly made out like they were.

           She was glad Carmella was looking at Emil and not her in that moment. It was a struggle to keep her thoughts in check, but she made herself focus on her siblings. She didn’t need them picking up on how chaotic her thoughts had just become.

           Emil was leaning against the doorframe into his study, looking at Carmella as she spoke to him. But his gaze flicked to her when he realised she was looking. “Are you ready to go?”

           Before Arabella could say anything, Carmella huffed. “Go? I just got here! Aren’t you going to stay and visit?”

           “I wouldn’t have planned a date if I’d known you were coming!”

           Carmella’s face softened and brushed Arabella’s hair back. “I know, Belli,” she said, kissing her forehead. “Just come home early enough so we can have tiramisu.”

Excitement burst through her. “Don’t make it without me!”

           “I should, to teach you a lesson,” Carmella teased, “but I’ll wait for you.”

           Kissing Carmella’s cheek, she grinned at her before going back upstairs. Her phone pinged as she walked back in and she dove for it. Her grin came back as she read the messages he’d sent.

           Your cat hates me, cara mia.

           She’s ruining my smokes!

           And terrorising Lys!

           Arabella laughed. She can’t be that bad, she sent back, sitting on her bed.

           He sent a picture that was at an odd angle, like he’d held the phone near his face to take a shot down his frame, but she could clearly see the kitten climbing his chest while he sat. Given everything he’d said once the last week, she imagined she was going for his cigarillo.  Minaccia is horrible.

           Don’t call her that!

           Too late, Bella. You made me take her so I name her.

           She kept laughing and flopped back on her bed. “Okay,” she said softly. What were they? Both of them had expressed wanting more than just the now but did that mean that they had taken that step to be in a proper relationship or did one of them need to verbally ask.

           Mulling it over, she grinned to herself. Maybe she would do just that later. They’d adopted a kitten together, surely he wouldn’t say no.

-

           Watching Arabella scamper up the stairs, Carmella waited until she heard a door close. “When did she get so big?” she mused. “She shouldn’t be having her new beginning or dating.”

           Emil chuckled. “I don’t know. I don’t like it though. Makes me feel old.”

           She turned to him, one brow raised. “You didn’t seem opposed,” she accused.

           He returned her look evenly. “Should we get this out of the way first then?” he asked.

           Her eyes narrowed as he moved into his office, leaving it up to her to follow. She almost regretted coming here first and sending Domenico to acquire an office space. But she’d wanted to see her sister, hadn’t considered that she might not be sticking around for long. They’d spoken nearly every day since her new beginning and it had made her miss Arabella terribly. Now that she was fully immortal, Carmella was determined to be more involved in her life.

           At least when she wasn’t going on dates with Leonardo da Vinci.

           “Tch,” she muttered, following after Emil. He was seated at the desk as she came in, back at work. Closing the door, she sat across from him and said, “She deserves better.”

           “Define better, Carmella, because I think all of us will agree that no one is good enough for her.” Emil paused. “Or at least I would have before her new beginning.”

           Which made no sense to her. “Why the change of heart? He’s spent most of his life shunning the rest of us and then he sweeps in to take our sister? I don’t like it, Emiliano. It reeks of an ulterior motive. No one even knew she existed before the invitations were sent.”

           Emil set his pen down and leaned back in his chair. “The truth, Carmella. Do you dislike da Vinci because you think he isn’t good enough for Arabella? Or is because of our history with him, yours specifically?”

           Her eyes narrowed again. “Have you told her?” she asked, ignoring the rest of what he’d said.

           “No. What happened, or didn’t happen then, has no bearing on what’s happening now between them.”

           “I just don’t like it! Why was he even there?! Our parents would have never invited him!”

           “You know they didn’t. He was brought by a guest of one of our older business partners.” Emil sighed. “But it doesn’t matter. What’s done is done and Arabella made her choice.”

           Carmella studied him. Emiliano was the stubbornest of all of them, maybe of all of them put together. He never backed down without a fight and had been protective over Arabella since she’d been born. He’d practically raised their baby sister as his own, packing up the business in France and moving back to Italy after her birth. Between him and his wife, Marie, they’d been more parents to Arabella than her proper ones. For him to seemingly roll over like this…he was hiding something. “What changed your mind about him?” she asked.

           “He makes Arabella happy. He has my support so long as that remains. I’ll withdraw it the moment it changes.”

           “Emiliano, you can fool Belli, but I know you better. Out with it.”

           His mouth flattened. “No,” he said, shaking his head. “This is theirs and we aren’t interfering.”

           Maybe he wasn’t but her livelihood was digging in the dark and she’d already started. “You know he was married before?”

           “Carmella.”

           “I don’t have this knowledge of yours that made you jump ship. I don’t know or trust him. Not with Arabella.”

           “Because he was married? That’s a lot to hold against a man.”

           “There’s nothing of his wife. It’s like she vanished from the Earth. It was almost impossible to even find this much about his life in France.”

           “Our existence hinges on staying out of sight. If he did marry, he would have done the same for her. To keep them both safe.”

           “But where is she now?” Carmella pressed. “His father is notorious for the wives he’s taken and moved on from. What if Belli is just a conquest for him?”

           “She isn’t.”

           “How do you know that?”

           “Carmella.”

           “How?”

           “Because he loves her,” Emil snapped.

           She pulled back, watching him warily. Love? How could he love someone so fast and get Emil to agree to allow him contact with their sister? “He barely knows her.”

           “And yet he loves her.” Emil sighed harshly and rubbed at his face. “You push too much sometimes.”

           “I don’t want her to get hurt.” Shit! There was too much in her voice but thinking about da Vinci made her think of the past and…of him.

           Emil’s hands dropped and he levelled a look at her. One she had seen many, many times in her long life. One she recognised as an older brother ready to defend his sister. “You’ve never mentioned his name.”

           “And I’m not going to now,” she dismissed, burying those memories. “It was probably fake.” The one she’d given him certainly had been.

           “It may mean little to you, but trust me, Carmella. She isn’t a conquest to him. Hurting her is the last thing on da Vinci’s mind.”

           She didn’t go on blind trust, not even for him, but he was right. She’d pushed hard enough on this for now. “We both know that’s not the only reason I’m here,” she said.

           It had always fascinated her, watching him go from Emil the older brother to Emiliano head of the Cavinato trading empire. She often wondered if the rest of them ever made the same switch when they were dealing with business matters. “You found something.”

           Taking a deep breath, she let go of her emotions to focus on the real reason she was here. “It was deliberate.”

           His expression didn’t change but the temperature in the room dropped. “Deliberate,” he repeated.

           “Those that worked the field were questioned first of course, but none of them even caused the faintest bit of alarm. Lesser vampires all of them, made by the house that owns those fields. They were cleared, every last one of them.”

           “But.”

           “Three of them turned up dead two days ago,” she said lowly.

           This time his expression did change but it was merely the flexing of his jaw as he clenched his teeth. “Dead.”

           Carmella took a breath again, but to steady herself this time. She’d seen what was left of them and it hadn’t been…pleasant. “All three shot through the heart at close range, meaning that whoever they were dealing with they trusted. Quick and easy deaths, at least that’s what the coroner ruled it.”

           “You’re not one to beat around the bush, Carmella. Quick and easy deaths don’t bother you. You lived in New York at the height of the mob wars that went on there. You’ve seen bad. Whatever you found, however, scared you.”

           She had lived through all of that, seen even worse, and…. “You’re right,” she agreed. “This did scare me. Single shots through the heart are nothing and yet everything to a lesser. But these…something didn’t sit right with me so I dug further. Got my own medical examiner to take a look. Lessers don’t heal quite as quickly as we do and the amount of deep tissue damage that had been done to them…. Emil, whoever did this to them, did it with rage and hatred.”

           He sighed harshly and shook his head. “You have reports? You don’t have to tell me.”

           She had them to give but this needed to be said. “She found more damage done to the internal systems, something no torture could have done.”

           Emil was quiet, pondering for a moment before his face tightened. “Poison?”

           Carmella pressed her lips together and made herself take a few more breaths. “I don’t think all of the tainted crops were contained, Emiliano,” she said softly.

-

           Resting his cheek against Arabella’s hair, Leonardo absently let his fingers toy with the ends. He watched the curls wrap around him, claiming him in a small way, and got lost in memories and this moment. Dinner had been fun and the movie almost as entertaining as her. He knew he should be taking her home, but he’d told the driver to take a scenic route back.

           She was tucked close to him, her legs slung over one of his and his other hand caught in hers. She was warm and soft in his grasp, content to simply be there with him. If it weren’t for the fact that she was rubbing her thumb against his hand, he would have thought her asleep.

           But his Bella had something on her mind and hadn’t said anything about it yet.

           He’d waited through dinner but she hadn’t mentioned it. Nothing before the movie or after. Their time together would be ending soon and he didn’t think she’d let that thought linger past parting. Prompting her could work but he didn’t want to rush her.

           “I had a lot of fun tonight, Leonardo,” she said suddenly, warm breath fanning over his chest.

           “So did I.”

           She sighed slowly before pushing away from him. He waited as she looked at him, waited as she found her words. He ran his fingers through her hair to help soothe her. “What are we?” she asked.

           “Vampires.”

           Arabella laughed sharply and smacked his chest. “That’s not what I meant!”

           He knew that but he hadn’t bothered stopping himself. “Alright, cara mia,” he murmured. “Forgive me? Will be serious.”

           She eyed him, laughter still dancing in her eyes. “I’ll forgive you if you answer a question.”

           “You’ve already used your question today,” he teased before making a face at himself. “Scusa. Apparently can’t be serious for long. What’s your question, Bella?”

           “Are we dating?”

           Leonardo studied her in the light filtering in through the windows. She was watching him in a way that made him think beyond the simple answer to that question. They were going on dates so of course they were dating, but he knew she meant more than that. He’d thought it had been obvious with his confessions and hers, their want of happiness together and of each other, but he realised she deserved the actual words. To be asked properly. “Scusa, cara mia,” he breathed, lifting his hands to thread them through her hair. “Skipped steps, didn’t we?”

           Her smile was faint and for the first time in a long time, a little shy.

           Stroking her hair, he let his hands slide back to cup her face. “Want you to be mine, Bella,” he said softly. “Will you be my compagna?”

           Her eyes widened at how he said it, immediately catching his meaning, and he chuckled.

           “No?” he murmured. “Wrong word?”

           “That’s a few more skipped steps!”

           But she didn’t sound opposed to the idea. He tucked that knowledge away for later. “L’amie?” he corrected, switching languages.

           “Le petit ami,” she said softly back and he laughed.

           Tipping her face up to his, Leonardo smiled at her. “That’s a yes then? Dating officially?”

           “That’s a yes,” she breathed before her nose wrinkled.

           “What is it?” he asked, kissing the tip of it.

           “I wanted to ask you to be my boyfriend but then I got too nervous thinking about it,” she admitted.

           Absolutely adorable. He stole a quick kiss from her. “That what you were thinking about all night?”

           She gave him a sheepish smile. “It seemed silly to be nervous, given everything but….”

           “Can’t help how we feel, Bella. The good or the bad.”

           “I prefer the good,” Arabella murmured, leaning in to kiss him.

           So do I, he thought as he kept her right there.

[justalittlelitnerd]

Frankly In Love by David Yoon

*Photo courtesy of penguinteen.com*

Title/Author/Publisher/Year Published: Frankly In Love by David Yoon | Published by Putnam Young Readers in September 2019

Plot Summary: Frank Li wants nothing more than to be in love. But it’s not that easy. Love never is, but especially not for Frank who has seen first hand what happens when his parents don’t approve. So Frank lives in the hypothetical: is it better to date someone who is Korean to appease his parents (but then they will always be involved) or date someone else that they might not approve of (and become ostracized)? But when Brit Means looks at him a little differently, it’s no longer a hypothetical because Frank Li is falling and falling fast. The only problem? Brit is white. Lucky for Frank a fellow Limbo (Limbo referring to the Korean-American children of his family’s friends who came over from Korea together) is in the same predicament. Joy and Frank come up with a scheme to date who they want with their parents none the wiser. They will fake date each other. It seemed like the perfect solution until Frank begins to suspect he might not be entirely faking it. 

Ugh, okay, so I have a lot of thoughts and feelings about this book so please just bear with me. Honestly, I hate saying it but I had such a tough time getting through this book. I think the main issue, as always, was my expectations. The way I’d heard people talk about it I was anticipating a cute, fun YA romance with my favorite trope, fake-dating-turned-real, and I guess in a way that is what it was? But I was vastly unprepared for Frank. Or the fact that this book is stuffed to the gills with tropes. 

Frank is weird, by the end I would say that I loved him, but I was initially caught off-guard by the way he talks and thinks and I found it made it harder to get into his character and thus the story. Additionally, his relationship with Brit feels like it comes out of nowhere and suddenly they’re in a fairly serious relationship? And *SPOILER* he ends up cheating on her with Joy. Normally, I don’t like to include spoilers or I hide them, but I feel like this is an important issue I had with this novel. I almost stopped reading because Frank is supposed to be the good guy and in that moment (and the following pages when he tells Brit) he was a fucking jackass. The only thing that slightly redeems him is that he immediately recognized it as cheating and didn’t waste time telling Brit or lying to her about it, but it still sucked. 

However, that all being said, the book holds some important discussions about what it means to be Korean-American, Asian-American, or really just anything with that dreaded hyphen. There’s talk about whiteness and how the privilege of belonging to the majority tends to erase those immigrant stories and identities. There are discussions of blackness not only because of Frank’s sister but because of Frank’s best friend. Race is interwoven into every aspect of this novel and David Yoon does it with grace and care and without fear.

Anyway, if you’ve read this and have thoughts feel free to respond! I’d like to see what other people who’ve read it thought about it in all of its chaotic glory.

Warning: Keep reading at your own risk because I have included a spoilers section for a few important details I wish I had known going into this book because they could be potentially triggering (nothing is graphic which is probably why it wasn’t heavily mentioned in discussions about this title). And as always my favorite quotes because damn does David Yoon have a way with words.

Spoilers:

Frank’s dad gets shot while working at The Store and almost dies, but survives only to find out that he has cancer and less than a year to live which sparks a fight with his longtime friends which means that right when Joy and Frank get their shit together they don’t feel like their parents will approve because there’s a rift so like fuck a happy ending I guess? 

Quotes:

She was brave—braver than me—but now I wonder if being brave is worth it. The brave go first into battle. But that makes them the first to go down, too.

In Language class Ms. Chit would called this code switching. It’s like switching accents, but at a more micro level. The idea is that you don’t speak the same way with your friends (California English Casual) that you do with a teacher (California English Formal), or a girl (California English Singsong), or your immigrant parents (California English Exasperated). You change how you talk to best adapt to whoever you’re talking to. But it’s not just about adaptation, as Ms. Chit explained. People can code switch to confuse others, express dominance or submission, or disguise themselves.

I feel my stomach wave hello. My ears grow warm. Gravity eases enough to loosen all the joints and nails and screws holding the world together until all its pieces are slowly tumbling free in a soft huge space lit only by the white rectangle beneath my thumbs. My girlfriend is texting me.

There’s an anger in my heart the color of dark red ready to paint the walls with curse words, but there’s no point in getting into all that.

Let me tell you something. I live to make people laugh. Parents, siblings, friends, lovers, doesn’t matter. I just have to. If you for some reason don’t know how to make someone laugh, then learn. Study that shit like it’s the SAT. If you are so unfortunate as to have no one in your life who can make you laugh, drop everything and find someone. Cross the desert if you must. Because laughter isn’t just about the funny. Laughter is the music of the deep cosmos connecting all human beings that says all the things mere words cannot.

American girl, they okay. When Mom-n-Dad say American, they mean white. When they refer to themselves—or me—they say hanguksaram, or Korean. I never call myself just Korean. I call myself Korean-American, always leading first with Korean or Asian, then the silent hyphen, then ending with American. Never just American. White people can describe themselves with just American. Only when pressed do they go into their ethnic heritage. Doesn’t seem fair that I have to forever explain my origin story with that silent hyphen, whereas white people don’t. It’s complicated. But simple. Simplicated.

But I feel bad for Brit, whose immigrant stories have most likely been washed away like surf erasing sandwriting. She may call herself European-American, but to most of the world she’s just white. As a member of the majority, she belongs everywhere. As the product of a long, mixed-up heritage, she belongs nowhere.

Saying it makes it feel more true. I get the feeling that the more I say it, the truer it will feel over time. And eventually this truth I’ve created will weave itself into every fiber of my reality, until it moves naturally with my every gesture like a favorite shirt I can’t help but wear always.

It’s like my heart has turned to lead and is now too heavy to carry alone, so Joy is helping me.

At first, I can’t tell why this is so hard for me. But really I’m lying to myself. I know exactly why it’s hard for me. Because down this conversational road is the acknowledgment of a fundamental difference between me and Brit—a fundamental difference of being—and I can’t bear to admit that such a difference exists. Brit—wise, awakened, aware Brit—belongs to a white majority whether she wants to or not, and is entitled to all its privileges—also whether she wants them or not.

I look at Brit a little differently now. Like there are more rooms than I realized in the house of her heart, and not necessarily neat-and-tidy ones.

She is scared to death saying this. I can see it in her eyes. I can smell it on her skin. Because love is more terrifying than anything. Love is a mighty blue hand coming straight for you out of the sky. All you can do is surrender yourself and pray you don’t fall to your death.

[cptaincarswell]

HPHM character profile

Tagged by my fave buddy @batgirl-87 (also both our MCs are Aquarius’ AND they’re a few days apart — I’m shook) and I tag @tsikuri

Also I’m def doing this for Jacob and Ivy for my own pleasure lolol!!! This also helped me better characterize Donna so thanks for the tag!!!!

Belladonna Skye Walker

Age: 16 (as of end of year 5)

Nickname(s): Donna, Don, Donnie

Bella (only Jacob can get away with call her Bella)

Bells (Jacob and Ivy)

Skywalker (Penny, Ben, any half-blood/muggle born who knows her well enough, the nickname eventually spreads through the quidditch team and quite a lot of people call her it)

Deadly Nightshade (quidditch nickname)

Nightshade (Merula)

Cursebreaker (Andre and like all of the school)

Date of birth: February 6, 1973

Zodiac sign: Aquarius

Ethnicity: Irish, Greek/Dorian

Nationality: Irish and Dorian

Species: witch, part Dryad

Blood type: O+ (I know nothing about blood type so I used mine)

Blood status: pure (by chance)

Family

Father: Bradley Walker

* Irish (born and raised in Adare, Ireland)

* Hufflepuff

* Youngest of his line

* Paranoid as heck

* A walking mess

* Carries the Dryad curse

Mother: Merida Walker (née Economos)

* from Crete, Greece

* Was homeschooled

* uses wandless magic - has never touched a wand

* Went to Ireland when she was 20 to broaden her horizons where she met Bradley

* The two married when she was 23 and he was 25, giving birth to Ivy a year later

* Legilimens

Godfather: Camphor Walker

* paternal uncle

* deceased as of 1980

* eldest of the two Walker boys

* cursed as part dryad

* Committed suicide

Godmother: Aretha Economos

* maternal Aunt

* Still lives in Crete

* The three children use to spend summers with her (Donna still does)

* She’s an aggressive woman (the children get their temper from their mothers side)

* Legilimens

Other:

Reed Jacob Walker

Ivy Gaia Walker

Affiliations/organizations:

Walker house

Economos House

Order of the Phoenix

Hogwarts

Hufflepuff house

Occupations:

Author

Private detective/bounty hunter

DADA Professor (just for a year)

Magical characteristics

Boggart:

* her brother turning evil (before finding him)

* Uncertainty (after finding him)

Patronus: just ganna say Fennec Fox, same as her animagus

Riddikulus: literally I never know what to do for this one, I guess the first one would be Jacob tripping into pie Bc lol and then she would just make the boggart decide on a small fear of hers and then turn it into something different each time Idek tbh

Mirror of erised: she first finds the mirror in her 5th year and she sees Jacob, Ivy, her uncle and her parents all together

Wand: 8 3/4", maple wood, Phoenix feather (I hc that Rakepick doesn’t break Donna’s wand)

Animagus: Fennec Fox

Amortentia:

* Fresh assorted flowers — reminds her of home

* Cigarettes — reminds her of Jacob

* Rosemary and mint— the way Ben smells

Appearance

Height: 5’2

Weight: 110-125 (after training for bounty hunting she gains a shit ton of muscle)

Complexion:

* tan as heck (the Greek in her shines through) (much tanner than her siblings who get more of the Irish)

* Light freckles on the cheeks

* Dark freckles on her arms, legs and back

* Eventually gets some scars from bounty hunting - nothing too severe but pretty noticeable

Hair color/style:

Auburn brownish red, just below the chest. It’s naturally wavy-curly but does it’s own thing so she’ll style it to be beach wavy or straighten it

Eyes: green/brown hazel

Hogwarts info

Worst class(es):

Potions (def Bc Of Snape)

History (she sleeps through it)

(Tbh she’s not very good in school, she only does well in the three classes below but these two are exceptionally bad for her)

Best class(es):

Herbology

DADA

Charms

Least fave teacher(s):

Snape... duh

Fave teacher(s):

Flitwick

McGonagall

Rakepick (I hc that Donna is actually very trusting with rakepick and they don’t have any tension or mistrust... it’ll make that moment so much more angsty)

Quidditch: played as the puff keeper for a short few months in year 4 before she became too involved with the vaults and finding her siblings

Fave spell(s): literally have no idea anything that creates fire should do it

Trivia

Random facts:

* hat stall between gryffindor and hufflepuff

* Knew she was legilimens before Dumbledore told her (it runs in her family, her mom taught her and Jacob how to control it, Ivy didn’t have it)

* Doesn’t need her wand to use magic but still uses it, not wanting to “show off”

* Speaks some Greek but can’t read or write it

* Usually curses in Greek

* Can, however, read and write Latin

* ESTP (extrovert, sensing, thinking, perceiving)

* Love language is physical touch and quality time

* Was forced to take the violin by her mother

* Is actually really talented at it but hates it Bc she had no choice

* Is really really good with little kids

* chaotic dysfunctional pansexual

* a cinnamon roll who actually would kill you

* Seems distrusting but actually trusts very easily and very intensely

* Has a supperrrr thick Irish accent that you can barely understand when she’s passionate or mad

* Started seeing a therapist at age 6 after she found her uncle dead

* Somewhere between chaotic good and chaotic neutral but more towards chaotic good

* Loves to dance alone to loud music

* Writes a book about her hogwarts cursed vault expedition and it quickly gets very popular

* She becomes a Professor for DADA during Harry’s second year but only for 5th years and up (some insurance so 5th and 7th year’s could pass the OWLs and NEWTs)

Future job:

Private investigator/bounty hunter (not super legal but when did Donna ever care about laws, she’s chaotic good for a reason)

Face claim:

11-13 Mackenzie Foy

Main FC - Danielle Rose Russel

[frghten]

guess who’s back from the dead and ready to party !! ( hint: it’s me ) but i’m a giant weenie about messaging people unprompted to plot so if you’d be interested in plotting with any of the babies below the cut, please give this a LIKE & i’ll jump into your ims !!!

lucian “angel” rosetti. 34. career thief. what happens when a spoiled rich kid gets dethroned? in angel’s case, they become a high profile thief to fund the life they’re so accustomed to living. angel is a danny ocean wannabe with a career to boot. started with small-time bank robberies, and now he has a crew that pulls full on heists (blows a kiss @ adelaide and maddox). still acts like the spoiled rich kid he was before his family cut ties with him. kinda nuts, gets giddy really easily, throws grown adult temper tantrums, will hold a gun to someone with a grin on his face (though things never get that messy). that tweet abt that dude in starbucks calling his wife and being like “do you want your iced coffee, or are you still being a bitch?” that’s him. the perversion that could have been a happy ending to “paul’s case”, gatsby with none of the discipline, hopelessly romantic in a literary sense.

adelaide marlowe. 33. career thief. the second third of angel’s crew !! grew up in rural tennessee, got mixed up with some bad characters and even ended up dating one. got roped into doing her first job by her boyfriend who promised to use the money to get her out of the shithole she grew up in. they did good, became infamous, started off knocking over a couple convenient stores, then soon were working their way across the country bank after bank. they took in the cash, eventually settled down. but apparently settled didn’t work well for him. the first time he laid a hand on her, she set their mansion ablaze with him inside of it and ran. later recruited by angel, now makes p much all the plans for any jobs they work. super smart. that harley quinn type of giggly crazy. a bubbly and lively presence, total sweetheart. stubborn and entitled. will go from saccharine to Bitch Mode in 0.1 seconds if you test her. angel’s best friend. chaotic neutral, loves making messes.

maddox shah. 26. getaway driver. the last third of angel’s crew !! grew up in a super tight knit family with three siblings. started drag racing to send money back to them, while they were under the impression he was bartending. built a reputation for himself, and was later connected to addie who convinced him to work a job with them. it was supposed to be a one time thing to rake in some cash, but it became a regular gig. now he’s pretty much a permanent fixture of the crew, a getaway driver or transporter depending on the job. tends to get a lot of attention from the ladies and he Ain’t Complaining, kind of a womanizer. went from being working class to having everything he could ask for almost over night, doesn’t take it for granted but definitely likes to splurge lmao. big ass goofball. likes last minute adventures to do dumb shit. considers himself an ameteur photographer which really just means he takes instagram too seriously.

willa rosetti. 21. university student. the younger of the two rosetti children, the one who never had the silver spoon so rudely snatched away from her. in her third year of undergrad, studying forensic anthropology. incredibly intelligent. hopelessly and endlessly infatuated with death. all tucked away underneath the image that her parents perscribed to her. wouldn’t dare to let herself go unnoticed, has something to say about everything ( even things she doesn’t know anything about; she’ll make you believe she does ), will talk a strangers ear off if they let her. secretly keeps in touch with her brother against her parents wishes, often daydreams about running away to join him on his grand adventures. 

luca de leon. 38. hitman. the softest killer you ever did meet, but he’d never let it show. raised by a single father with the same profession, taught to be a soldier as soon as his little arms could bear the weight of a gun. keeps a stoic, no-nonsense front to hide serious loneliness. very rigid, quiet gentleman kinda presence usually, but gets sassy when he’s peeved adfvsdf. real bad guilt complex. likes to talk about philosophy despite believing that most of it is a crock of shit. owns his label as the typical stone-face criminal tbh.

jensen reed. 35. bar owner. another character involved with angel’s bullshit but not an actual member of his crew. owns a bar that he uses to launder money for criminals. charismatic, funny, a great sweet talker. but also foolhardy, impulsive and incredibly short sighted, probably doesn’t fully grasp how deep he’s gotten himself in, but chooses to forgo worrying about the future and concern himself with whatever the reward is in the moment. a flirtatious dummy. greasy, hole-in-the-wall bar aesthetic. hums a lot and likes to play the guitar but isn’t great at it. probably wants to be ur friend.

[msterofnone-blog]

jack rider ; intro, stats, verses & connections

JACK RIDER looks an awful lot like ALEX TURNER. HE/HIM are/is TWENTY NINE and while they’re FRIENDLY, they have a tendency to get pretty UNMOTIVATED. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to HAND IN GLOVE by THE SMITHS.

- first of all; no matter who you are or what you want, jack rider doesn’t give a shit

- he will act friendly to everybody around him & is well known, but not well liked, more feared; everybody knows that he talks shit about them behind their backs as soon as they walk away

- he was born in manchester, england & his family moved to kola when he was 10; his mother had dreams (delusions) of making it big in hollywood, and was always distant from him, and when her plans didn’t work out, she grew more and more detached from the family. they had to stay as his dad, the realist, had set up his own repair shop to sustain them - his parents stayed together but his dad worked himself to the point of exhaustion whilst his mother would sit by the window every day, unspeaking; they passed away with a month of one another when jack was 18

- he’s a mechanic in kola & fixes cars just as his dad did (i had the greaser thing planned before the greaser anon & now i feel bad) so again he comes into contact with a lot of people - this business progressed into something more as he got older

- working with cars, his first foray into the criminal world was as a getaway driver (baby driver anyone?) but he was about 18 and still pretty new, but he wanted to be something more than his dad had been so he stuck with it and made his way up through the ranks

- he now works with the gang he was first involved with in dealing through his repair shop, but its more of an open secret

- at 29, he should be getting a little restless about his future but he’s never looked to settle down, and will loudly (obnoxiously) pronounce that love does not exist - at least not for men like him

FULL NAME: jack rider PRONUNCIATION: ja-c rye-der MEANING: any man REASONING: not the type of parents to think too deeply about his name rly NICKNAME(S): ponyboy (ANYONE) PREFERRED NAME(S): jack BIRTH DATE: november 2nd 1989 AGE: 29 ZODIAC: scorpio  GENDER: male PRONOUNS: he/him ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: panromantic SEXUAL ORIENTATION: pansexual NATIONALITY: british ETHNICITY: white british CURRENT LOCATION: kola, california LIVING CONDITIONS: lives above his repair shop in an outdated flat; really only uses it to sleep in & takes no pride in looking after it

BACKGROUND

BIRTH PLACE: manchester royal infirmary, manchester, england  HOMETOWN: machester, england  SOCIAL CLASS: lower EDUCATION LEVEL: finished high school FATHER: paul rider MOTHER: flora rider SIBLING(S): n/a CHILDREN: n/a PET(S): n/a  OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES: n/a PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: never ever one to commit so has never had anything serious  ARRESTS?: countless  PRISON TIME?: 6 months

OCCUPATION & INCOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME: fixing cars  SECONDARY SOURCE OF INCOME: dealing  APPROXIMATE AMOUNT PER YEAR: $30k CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THERE OF)?: he’s convinced himself he is & has become somewhat of a self fulfilling prophecy - he used to dream of being a writer when he was much much younger & breaking out of the cycle of the men in his family; it didn’t happen PAST JOB(S): always been an apprentice to his father, who also fixed cars SPENDING HABITS: too much on cigarettes, not on the essentials  MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION: his chevrolet 

SKILLS & ABILITIES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH: fairly strong INTELLIGENCE: used to read a lot but hasn’t in over 10 years, a mediocre writer who never got the chance to improve  TALENTS: very good mechanic   SHORTCOMINGS: anything with numbers - he always works things out by eye  LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN: english DRIVE?: yes JUMP-STAR A CAR?: yes CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?: yes RIDE A BICYCLE?: no SWIM?: yes PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?: barely plays guitar  PLAY CHESS?: no BRAID HAIR?: yes - used to braid his mothers hair  TIE A TIE?: yes PICK A LOCK?: yes

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM: alex turner  EYE COLOR: brown HAIR COLOR: brown HAIR TYPE/STYLE: greased back always  GLASSES/CONTACTS?: nope  DOMINANT HAND: right  HEIGHT: 5′8″ WEIGHT: 156 lbs EXERCISE HABITS: lifting heavy weights when he works on cars but that’s about it SKIN TONE: on the paler side TATTOOS: 3 PEIRCINGS: one ear MARKS/SCARS: a scar on his shoulder from an ‘accident at work’ NOTABLE FEATURES: he use looks a bit mean most of the time really USUAL EXPRESSION: looking mean CLOTHING STYLE: old style greaser - the same as his father JEWELRY: rings when he’s not working & a watch ALLERGIES: n/a DIET: baD PHYSICAL AILMENTS: n/a

PSYCHOLOGY

JUNG TYPE: entj MORAL ALIGNMENT: chaotic neutral TEMPERAMENT: sanguine ELEMENT: fire APPROXIMATE IQ: 95 MENTAL CONDITIONS/DISORDERS: n/a OBSESSION(S): appearing unbothered by everything COMPULSION(S): checking his hair PHOBIA(S): relationships??? honestly  ADDICTION(S): smoking DRUG USE: he deals but won’t do anything he deals ALCOHOL USE: too much PRONE TO VIOLENCE?: too much 

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE: a bit too loud and cocky  ACCENT: manchester  HOBBIES: trying in his very little spare time to play guitar but not telling anybody HABITS: smoking NERVOUS TICKS: his foot starts tapping DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS: not many at all; lives day to day FEARS: being alone with himself  POSITIVE TRAITS:  funny, friendly & loyal NEGATIVE TRAITS: violent, closed-off emotionally & judgemental  SENSE OF HUMOR: he’s funny ngl DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?: yeah CATCHPHRASE(S): ‘jack of all trades’

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY: working on cars ANIMAL: dogs BEVERAGE: whiskey  BOOK: to kill a mockingbird - harper lee CELEBRITY: mick jagger COLOR: black DESIGNER: he ain’t got a clue FOOD: bacon sandwiches  FLOWER: orchids GEM: ruby HOLIDAY:  he gets the most business (wink wink) around new year MODE OF TRANSPORTATION: ...cars MOVIE: the outsiders  MUSICAL ARTIST: the clash QUOTE/SAYING: ‘stay gold’  SCENERY: countryside SCENT: cinnamon  SPORT: football SPORTS TEAM: manchester united  TELEVISION SHOW: black mirror  WEATHER: rain VACATION DESTINATION: back home to britain

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM: he has none )-: it was to write & escape what seemed to be laid out for him... it didn’t happen GREATEST FEAR: being forgotten about MOST AT EASE WHEN: working in his shop LEAST AT EASE WHEN: by himself WORST POSSIBLE THING THAT COULD HAPPEN: he lost his shop BIGGEST ACHIEVEMENT: fixing up a car on his own for his dad BIGGEST REGRET: not getting his mother to engage with him - not trying harder to MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT: throwing a screwdriver at who he thought was his friend... it wasn’t... hospital happened BIGGEST SECRET: that he used to want to write  TOP PRIORITIES: making money 

&. VERSES

none yet!! working on it

&. WANTED CONNECTIONS

ROMANTIC.

i wanna be yours - jack fiercely disbelieves in love, and this person makes him question this long held belief (partners in crime)

leave before the lights come on - somebody jack’s being seeing for months, unwittingly (or perhaps wittingly) leading them on without seeing it as anything near serious

bigger boys & stolen sweethearts - the two used to play make believe together when they were young before one of them moved away - they’d made a pact to marry one another at 6 years old & now jack ( the love non-believer remember ) has been invited to their wedding

PLATONIC.

red light indicates doors are secure - somebody else in the same gang as jack; they’re close & watch each others backs

only ones who know - somebody who often visits his repair shop & their company & conversation lets him escape to normalcy for a few hours a week ( could become romantic!! )

fake tales of san francisco - jack finished high school but only just & has forgotten his love for words - somebody smart stumbles into his life and helps him reignite his interest ( in private, of course ) 

ENEMIES.

dangerous animals - member/s of rival gang/s cos we been knew my boy likes to fight

do me a favour - an ex from a very turbulent relationship whom jack probably hurt very badly & left without much of a thought 

&. FILLED CONNECTIONS

ROMANTIC.

none!!

PLATONIC.

none!!

ENEMIES.

none!!

[weneedtherooks]

Annemarie

Soooo...I couldn’t really come up with a decent title. This is going to be a story involving Clara and Friedrich’s oldest child, Annemarie.

Please read the tags before reading, I did insert some warnings this time around. Nothing graphic or detailed. Please let me know if you want something else tagged!

Annemarie Rosenthal never got in trouble. She rarely did anything that could potentially influence how her siblings acted...yet, there she was. Sitting in the police station, staring at her bloody knuckles as she waited for her father to collect her. Everything felt so...distant. She’d barely paid any attention to the officer that pulled her off of...him. That useless piece of shit. She looked over at him; he still had his hand on his nose. She was fairly certain it was broken, and the gash on his head was still bleeding a little.

Good. After what he did… Let him suffer for a while.

His mother was the first to arrive. All screeching and “Who did this?!”...it was aggravating. Anne was still livid. She didn’t care when he started pointing fingers at her. She didn’t care when his mother started lecturing her and telling the police she needed to be arrested for assault. She didn’t care when his little friends all piled in and started shouting the same. “So that should excuse murder?” she asked aloud, her voice barely a whisper. More yelling. More finger pointing.

Her father walked in, immediately confused by the chaotic shouting. She looked at her feet, swallowing the sudden guilt. “I hate him.” “Annemarie, what happened?” “Does it matter? They don’t care.” “Annie.”

The image was still fresh in her mind. The gentle swing of Alexis’s body as it hung from their tree. The look of...pride that boy had in his “work”. The disgusting sound of laughter that came from his friends. The blind anger that drove her to beat his face into a bloody pulp in hopes that it would become unrecognizable. The thought still made her sick.

“They lynched her, papa. Because they thought they could have me for themselves.”

Friedrich inhaled sharply through his nose, his expression unreadable. “So...does someone want to explain why my daughter is being held accountable for her actions, but not your son? This is murder.” Annemarie didn’t want to hear any of their excuses. “Have you seen Nick and Kurt? They were with me.” “Yeah, your little bastard brothers have gone missing. Funny how that happened.” Friedrich faced the boy. “Call my boys bastards again, son. See what happens when you do.” He fell silent, her father’s point loud and clear. “They told me what happened. I had hoped it was a lie.” Friedrich answered. “They brought some questionable company home with them as well. I’m glad to see that they made it here to the police in one piece on their own.” He faced the boy’s friends, who were flanking either side of their friend. “We still need to discuss that rock you threw into my front window. I’m sure one of the officers here can get in touch with your families on that matter.” They both looked down at the floor, not wanting to make eye contact with her father or the officer present. “It wouldn’t have hit the window if-” “If Kurt hadn’t dodged it. I saw what happened. It doesn’t make you look any better, admitting that you would have preferred hitting my son over my house.” “This wouldn’t have even happened if your daughter wasn’t fucking that n-” “If that word even finishes coming out of your mouth, I’ll knock it right back in. Unlike you, I’m not afraid to sit in a cell for assault.” Friedrich spat, cutting him off in an icy tone. “Andrew, yes? Tell me this: what exactly was going through your head that you thought MURDERING someone was a good idea?” Friedrich turned to level a glare at his mother. “What kind of twisted logic are you teaching that boy? That it’s acceptable to just “remove” whatever might be in his way? Even if he was told multiple times to back away?!”

“Do we really want the answer to that, Friedrich?”

They turned to see Pastor Isaiah walking in. His question was spoken softly, as if he truly believed no one in the room would listen. He looked towards the officer. “Where is my daughter?” As they walked away, the room fell into silence, unsure of how to proceed any more. Friedrich took the moment to crouch in front of Annemarie, taking her hands into his. “Liebling, you need to tell me what happened, as best you can.” Annemarie inhaled, her voice shaky as she spoke. “She left me a note. We were going to meet up today. I was running late helping mama with dishes at the diner. I went to our usual meeting spot, but she wasn’t there. So, I figured, she must have gone to our place by the tree. When I got there…” She squeezed her father’s hands, trying to contain both her anger and the abrupt feeling of needing to vomit. “Andrew was there...with a few of his lacky friends. They were...saying something like “She can’t say no now” and some other stuff...and they just kept laughing and…” Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. Her father was rubbing her knuckles with his thumb, sighing as he watched her sob. “Annie, I’m so sorry. This is something you should never have seen, and never should have happened.” he said quietly. They sat in silence until the pastor came back, his eyes puffy and red. “God, Isaiah, I’m so sorry.” “For what? The Lord choosing to take one of his daughters? There is nothing to be sorry about.” “Isaiah…” He held up his hand. “Just pray for me, will you Friedrich? I need to tell Mamie about this as well. I know you aren’t much of a praying man, but I will need all the strength I can get.” He then went to Anne, pulling her into a tight hug. “And don’t think I won’t be praying for you, young lady. I prayed to God for such cruelty to never come, but alas, the Devil was stronger this time.” With that, he left.

Four days had passed before they heard from the family. There was no trial, as expected. Swept under the rug. They had decided to do a memorial after they buried her; they didn’t want a big crowd attracting any unnecessary attention. Nikki offered his help with the burial; it was the least he could do for them, since they were like a second family to him. And, of course, Annie was invited to join them at the burial site. She thought she’d run out of tears. Alexis was beautiful. They’d put her in her favorite peach dress, and she was wearing the necklace Anne had bought for her. She could hardly watch as they put the lid on the coffin and set her in her grave. The memorial service was quiet. Anne had long since disassociated herself from the outside world; it still didn’t feel real. She wondered if it ever would feel real. Afterwards, she went to their tree, finding the little alcove where they would stay and talk for hours about anything and everything the world could offer. She got on her knees, opening a nearby box that held all of their drawings, notes, and treasures. Alexis’s fashion designs, Anne’s attempts at poetry, trinkets they’d found during long walks… She laid down on the ground, clutching the box close to her chest.

And there, in the silence of the evening…

She cried once more.