#anyway idk. call this a proof of concept more than anything else

[finitevoid]

vv roleswap

Vanitas sits cross-legged on his bed, holding Terra’s old practice Keyblade and contemplating the exam’s results. You failed to keep the darkness inside of you in-check. Terra, hesitantly, as if despite himself, had looked at Vanitas, when their master said that. 

Vanitas rubs his gloved hand over his mouth, relishing in the scratchy feeling of leather against his soft skin. His thumb brushes the wood grain of the Keyblade, idly. 

Vanitas ponders the ways of the light and the dark. Terra and Vanitas have always been close; and what is Vanitas, if not ineffably tainted by the dark?

He chokes on the thought, attempting to swallow it and the emotions it conjures. He cannot allow himself to make an Unversed. Vanitas is being foolish; foolhardy, as his Master would say. He has to keep better control of his wandering thoughts; a focused mind leads to a focused heart, and only with focus can Vanitas overcome the darkness inside of him. 

And then there’s a wooden knock on his doorway. Expecting Aqua, or maybe the Master, Vanitas tosses the practice Keyblade onto his bedspread with more force than it probably requires, raising his head somewhat miserably, to look at—

Vanitas goes very, very still.

A boy stands in the open doorway, standing prim and tall. He’s dressed in… some kind of armor, Vanitas decides. It doesn’t look like metal, but it doesn’t look like cloth either. Not quite flesh, though something about it feels… organic. Bright, gleaming white, it hugs the boy’s torso, covering him from the tips of his fingers to the spiked, jagged helmet that covers his face.

He’s standing with one hand behind his back, and he raises the other in a jaunty wave. He bobs excitedly in place, leaning his weight on his heels. 

It sort of reminds Vanitas of when he… no, that can’t be right. But there’s something about this boy, something that has him freezing still like a rabbit standing before a predator. An Unversed tugs itself from his chest, bubbling up from the pooling darkness at Vanitas’ feet. 

A Hareraiser rises from the ground, formless purple turning into a rabbit, red eyes crying, holding onto its own ears. Vanitas feels his fear ebb, halfway to being calm. Swallowing the immediate rush of guilt and regret that tastes like bile, he fixes his gaze on the stranger.

He stands from his bed, falling into a combat position. The masked boy pays this no mind, though. Instead, he bends a little at the waist and coos. “Oh my,” he gasps, reaching out for the Unversed. “Aren’t you just the cutest little thing!” It flinches away from his outstretched fingers, skittering across the wooden floor. It hides behind Vanitas’ shins, making tiny noises.

“Who are you?” Vanitas snaps, making his voice as authoritative as he doesn’t feel.

The mask tilts, until it's faceless visage is looking at Vanitas, and not the Hareraiser. “So that’s seriously your Negativity? That’s so cool,” he sighs, forlorn and breathless, like he’s genuinely jealous of Vanitas’ Unversed. “Oh, sorry!” He chirps, straightening up suddenly. “Where’re my manners?” He hooks his hands underneath his helmet and pulls it off, revealing—

—something about his face is making Vanitas’ head spin. Spin and spin, like someone’s attached a rope to his heart and is tugging on it, incessantly. Something is making Vanitas’ chest feel hot and his fingers twitch. Viciously, he pushes it down. Shoves it back down and stomps on it, pulling on his memories of his Master’s advice for strength.

“You have to be in control, Vanitas,” Master Eraqus had said, three years ago now, eyes stony with seriousness. “You can never, ever let your heart run wild.”

It helps, a little. It makes him feel more grounded, present in his body. He is the master of his emotions, and one day, he will be free of his darkness. He just has to remember that.

Unbeknownst to Vanitas’ disparate emotions, the boy beams wide. His cheeks are ruddy with a youthful vigor that Vanitas lacks, and his green eyes sparkle like gems. There’s something bright, about his eyes, about his teeth. Like they’re backlit by the setting sun, just enough to make them gleam.

Blonde hair bounces as he sticks his hand out to shake. “I’m Ventus!”

He doesn’t want to touch this boy; something is telling him not to touch him. Something in the heart-pounding fear rattling his chest. Except for— something in him wants nothing more than to touch him. To feel— skin unlike Vanitas’ own. Unperturbed, Ventus drops his hand, grinning wide.

“I can’t believe myself! My master would have my head for being so rude!” He laughs, cheerful and bubbly, shaking his head. He thumps the heel of his hand to his forehead, expression sheepish. “That’s no way to introduce myself, is it? Especially not to someone who could become a friend.”

He drops his hand, and something about his entire cadence changes. His expression sharpens, though it doesn’t change; his smile goes from sheepish to wicked between one blink and the next. “Because we are going to become friends, aren’t we…” there’s something leading in his tone, halfway sweet and halfway… something else. “…Vanitas?”

Vanitas’ fingers go cold, and before he can swallow the feeling, another Hareraiser is rising from an inky puddle at his feet. Then two more, rising into existence as if formed from the shuddering in his chest, the pounding of his heartbeat. 

“How do you know that?” Vanitas asks, sharply. Another Hareraiser, and only then does the fear fade. “Tell me how you know my name.”

Ventus’ eyebrows climb to his hairline, a smile frozen to his face. “I know a lot,” he says, shrugging like this is… like this is nothing, a casual discussion, a joke. He smiles like Vanitas is an idiot, fluttering a hand. “‘Cause, the thing is… I’m not from here.”

Vanitas stares at him, blankly.

Grinning, Ventus extends a finger towards Vanitas’ window. Not just his window; at the sky. The stars. Other worlds. He’s from… he’s from away. He’s from outside. 

Vanitas wasn’t born on the Land of Departure. Nobody is; the Master welcomes those with the aptitude to wield a Keyblade, or he gifts them with the aptitude. Aqua and Terra don’t ever talk much about their life before coming here, but he knows there’s nowhere for them to return to. Why would there be? Their home is here.

Except, Vanitas wasn’t born here. His memory is— infamously— spotty, but he remembers… not a desert so much as just dirt, dirt devoid of life. Scraping against his soft, bare palms; hard dusty rock that spat clouds that made him choke. Flashes of sheer brown cliffaces, and the taste of his own blood.

“You’re from outside…” Vanitas says.

Ventus laughs like that’s just so funny, shoulders shaking and chest shuddering. He laughs like nobody Vanitas has ever met, like his laughter buoys him, elevates him, makes him better. And something burns in Vanitas— something between this boy’s face, and his laugh, and his name. 

Wait. 

The only other Keyblade Master— the man Master Eraqus had called his good friend— who’d come to oversee Aqua and Terra’s exam… he was from outside, too. This boy had joked about a master, maybe even a Master.

Vanitas says, “Master Eraqus said Master Xehanort didn’t have an apprentice.”

Ventus’ expression snaps to Vanitas, and for the first time, something truly ugly flashes across his face. And then it’s smoothed out, turned into something gentle and soft and a little mocking. “Well… if you spend all your time locked up here,” he shrugs a shoulder, giving a gentle smile. “What’dyou know?”

Vanitas doesn’t look down to see whatever Unversed that statement spawns; he just stands there, almost stutters out of his combat stance, and then forces himself to summon his Keyblade. Void Gear is heavy in his hand, and he holds it in front of himself defensively.

Ventus’ eyes fall onto the Keyblade, and then flick back to Vanitas’ face. “Funny,” he says, a wry tilt to his mouth. “Can I give you some advice? Since we’re friends?”

“Since when have we been friends?” Vanitas snaps.

Ventus laughs again. “Since always, silly,” he mimes wiping a tear from his eye. “But, hey. Since you don’t believe me, I’ll tell you anyway! Call it a sign of good faith.” He beams, clasping his hands in front of himself. “You might…” He taps a hand to his cheek, looking up at nothing, theatrical, “…want to check on Terra.”

“What?” Whatever Vanitas was expecting, it wasn’t that.

“I don’t think he’s gonna be feeling like himself,” Ventus says, the sides of his smile curled up sharp. “Not for much longer, anyway.”

Vanitas’ mind is racing, even as more Unversed rise from his feet. The Master will be so disappointed in him… but he can’t think about that. Instead, he thinks about Ventus. About his words, and his mocking smile, and the fact that he knows Vanitas’ name.

“What’s gonna happen to Terra?” Vanitas’ voice is foreign to his ears, a cruel scrape against the otherwise quiet. “What are you going to do to Terra?”

He feels the Unversed looming around the dark corners of the room.

“Me?” Ventus says, pointing to himself. “Nothing.”

“What is your master going to do, then?”

His eyes glow. He seems to gleam. His face… looking at it, Vanitas feels hot. Like claws raking against his heart, rending open his chest from the inside out. Looking at his face makes him feel like Vanitas is oozing something.

“Who are you?” 

“Who cares?" He says, easy as breathing. "Anyway, my master'll be expecting me back. Nice meeting you!” Ventus waves a hand, wiggling his fingers. And then there’s a pop, so loud Vanitas’ ears hurt. A bright, white light flashes, like lightning crashing against the cold ground. Vanitas flinches away, flinging Void Gear in front of his chest protectively.

When he blinks, Ventus is gone. Vanitas is alone.

Well, Vanitas and a horde of Unversed. He rubs at his nose, blowing out a frustrated breath. Another Unversed forms as he does; a Blue Sea Salt hovers in the air next to his head, and it gently headbutts him. 

Vanitas shoves it away, still trying to calm the racing of his heart. A Bruiser noses underneath Vanitas’ arm, and he allows himself to lean against it, lightheaded. He doesn’t know what’s going on— not yet. 

But he needs to find out. He needs to warn the Master, about this boy, and—

Maybe… Maybe he better check on Terra, first. That’s all. It’ll all make sense. Vanitas will make it make sense. With his bare hands and determination clutched in both fists, he’ll make it make sense.

And if he locks the Unversed in his bedroom, trapping them inside… well, nobody needs to know. He has to take precautions. He has to hide the evidence. He has to figure this out.

He needs to focus.

[proship-confessional]

I was never really Involved in fandom for YEARS at first, like, there’s definitely things I brainrotted on, mostly just bouncing shit between my brother and me (funny thing about my brother, is a fandom prude, but not in an anti way, like, he refuses to even CONSIDER anything if it’s not canonically feasible, but if it happens to be a proship concept that makes sense with the canon, he couldn’t care less), not really fully engaged with any wider fanbase, yknow?

anyways, I went off my adhd meds for the first time since preschool (I was diagnosed YOUNG) when Covid hit and got whammied with the biggest hyperfixation I’d ever had up to that point and that I have ever had since. I’m still chasing that high. But anyways, that hyperfixation was DSMP

and again, kudos to my brother frfr, he heard I was obsessing over controversial block men and was just like Aight cool wanna make a crossover AU with this book series I like. And so we would spend HOURS at a time just talking about who fits where and shit

and ANYWAYS, DSMP had probably one of the most solid antiship/proship divide I have ever seen in any fandom to this day. Maybe I’m wrong and there’s something else bigger than the DSMP did it. But I don’t think I am.

I made an entirely separate email account in order to make an entirely separate ao3 account and discord account and twitter account because literally everyone in poppytwt did it. Oh yeah our proship community was called poppytwt and idk where the term came from but I like it

and everyone was private and you had to send proof you’re poppy to follow anyone and fanfics weren’t tagged with ANY main tags other than the ship tags themselves and it still feels like it was a whole ass black ops operation

and A N Y W A Y S idk where I’m really going with this. it was one hell of an adrenaline rush, I’ll tell you that. As previously stated. I am still chasing that high. I know a large poppy population migrated to tumblr at some point, but I hadn’t made a poppy tumblr (I had the email. I easily could have. But the fixation was already dying by then. Glad I didn’t tbh since I used it recently to make a general proship acc). If any poppyblr people see this, HAIIII :3

oh and also. That crossover thing I mentioned way back at the start is the type of crossover that’s “take the plot of one and the characters of another and line them up just so”, and we obviously took Tommy as the protagonist and branched out from there (since Tommy was pretty much the DSMP protagonist, as easily as a Minecraft server can have one), and through sheer chance of following the web out from there, Ranboo landed himself in the slot of Love Interest, and through SHEER DUMB LUCK, I’m a Tomboo main. And the plan was that if we ever wrote the fic, we’d make it platonic, but I’ve seen a lot more main fandom tomboo fics lately (mixed feelings abt that. On the one hand, Yay! Tomboo! On the other hand, Did My Blood And Sweat Shed In The Trenches Mean Nothing? How Dare You Scorn My Name Only To Turn Around And Do The Same Crimes.), so if bro and I ever get around to writing, i might just make it romantic and see what happens.

!!!

[odukora-lore]

how about 🌹🤹‍♂️ and of course ✂

Haha almost a month late to this ffs anyways

Most recently written line:

Ngl I actually do have some concept dialogue for Aeris/Barley interactions so you get a tiny snippet of a scene lol

^ this is somewhattt in their youth but also not exactly (think that fun window of post graduation dance and beginning their own careers whilst also attempting to still be involved in each other's lives, alas this is before I even planned the entire Tundra fake death deal so I actually have no idea whether this is before or after that, date in this sense is wholly platonic and Aeris started the idea lol

(I would love to point out how Barley is more fazed over it being a *coffee* date than a coffee *date*, like oh my best friend wants to catch up w me and has invited me to hang out w her on a scheduled time? 🥰 But also wtf Aeri you don't drink coffee 😒 you think I don't know that)

Plot points I'm juggling:

Idk man so much fucking patchnotes for EI lately I think I've ranted to you enough lmaooooo, these days I'm kinda trying to settle whether its gonna end up as a supposed tertiary story tbh, alongside possibly finding another way to categorize my damn stories for once, TEF and POE are very solid in comparison so I'm very ??? on the direction rlly

That said I suppose you can get some bonus notes in my drafts abt some char dynamics I haven't yet spilled:

> Also a fun thing is Sundae is actually suchhhh a big fangirl of Chase (I figured I'm just throwing in the Amy core vibe into her cuz she alrdy looks like her, she's so bisexual core thou cuz... Actually yeah Sundae and Lune are sorta implied endgame lmao albeit not the focus, I'm still ruminating on how to expand their dynamic rlly but I rlly liked the contrast they served, it's a very Whisper wanting a knight in shining armour big time (I've thought abt her crushing on Aaron before just to hint at the original ship prerevamp lmao) before she ends up w Nyx way) this is also Ironic cuz Sundae probs wanted to become a glowlin just to meet Chase.... That's half of her motif anyway... But she eventually finds joy in being a hero anyway and he becomes this sorta inspo for her for how passionate he is abt his role, more abt her burnout arc eventually lol

> Lune meanwhile rlly dislikes Chase cuz she's one of the original recruits of BEYOND and is very wary of his implented dark motifs™ that Aeris initially warned her abt but even Aeris has sorta grown less wary of him seeing him having made a completely new name for himself instead of just solely following her footsteps

> Sparklyn may alsooo be renamed idk tbh so many chars are getting renamed alrdy anyway... I do know she is supposedly the one who Aeris deems to most resemble her in terms of that raw passion™ (you'd think Sundae fits it better but Aeris is actually so aware of her whole thing abt Chase lmao and a part of her is too full of herself to be the leader.... Lune isn't as passionate ofc... Arctic is having way too much fun and Gale is due for a confidence boost ... if anything Sparklyn is the perfect "replacement" for having a tinge of humbleness whilst not being afraid of taking the job seriously, but it also has so much to do w her being from the other dimension and idk when Aeris will eventually figure that out, her origins of humbleness is sorta what sets her apart... She is not exactly destined for greatness the way Chase is...)

> I think the true wack thing is while BEYOND members are aware Aeris has a separate dual life going on as a reporter/journalist (ngl this is probably why she found out abt Chase's having sus origins earlier than anyone else did) nobody is aware that she is Tundra... That's the kicker.... Only Barley knows and he tries very hard to keep it a secret having erased all remaining proof of her being alive, he was very much there to witness the supposed self induced death... Idk whether to call it a suicide fakeout cuz to everyone Tundra dying was her sacrifice from protecting the realm... and very much not self induced... And then she doesn't die anyway she just pretends that she is gone... Barley is very well aware of all this... I think even at the end of the story Sparklyn and Chase are the only ones that find out abt her true identity... If anyone else rllyyyy had to know then maybe Lune but she's the kind to find out and never tell anyone lmao I don't think even Aeris knows of this but she can also sense it w the sudden respect Lune has for her that she previously never had (like Lune does respect Aeris but then they often also buttheads cuz their personalities and motifs are so diff, but Aeris has been in the supposed industry for so long she can never hold it against a youngster who's just trying to survive)

Cut plot points

Idk man EI isn't that developed to have that much cut plot points but so far its probably to make Chase more or a solo hero instead of the initial idea of having him have a team... (Bonus w Nimble being a lil sidekick but their bond is fleshed out enough for me to bother writing them in) Cuz I thought him being Aeris' replacement made more sense if he were to shoulder everything himself, also as an excuse to pretty much reduce the character count lmao I didn't wanna add too much to the point they end up unexplored (a lot of POE chars suffer from this unfortunately and it's something I'm trying to fix as of late, TEF has a more solidified cast where everyone has some sort of relevance and I'm trying to do the same w EI here), in fact a lot of the chars in SF and SD are very underdeveloped lmao whilst TSIAS suffers from a chronically low character count of just six... I need more plot points rlly (I do have something brewing in my head as of late but I'm too EI brainrotted latey to expand on it)

[makeste]

some follow-up thoughts on BnHA 306

mostly Deku angst, but also a little Baku angst (and some TodoBaku angst) mixed in for good measure. because there’s plenty of angst to go around.

1. “if I’d only been stronger...”

I’ll talk more about Deku later in this post as well, because there’s definitely plenty to talk about; this is the most character development he’s gotten in almost 200 chapters. but for starters, I want to discuss the possible parallels between Deku’s current character arc, and what is arguably the most iconic moment of angst/character development in the series.

remember how this kid, who up until this point had rarely seemed to give two fucks about the world around him, suddenly revealed that he blamed himself for being the downfall of All Might? remember how it came almost out of nowhere? how he’d been hiding it, and trying to suppress it? “but even if I try to forget... sometimes it all just comes rushing back.”

yeah. so anyway, I got to thinking -- if being the cause of one hero’s downfall could affect someone this badly, what about being responsible for the downfall of all heroes?

what if a boy who wanted nothing more than to keep people safe suddenly found himself at the epicenter of a disaster that killed hundreds, possibly even thousands of people?

now obviously, this is not the sole thing that’s troubling Deku right now; this kid has a whole array of traumas as of the War arc. like, you know it’s bad when Society As We Know It Coming To An End Partially Because Of You is the least of your problems. but still, I think this is worth bringing up, because the hero kids blaming themselves for things that aren’t their fault is hardly anything new. and yet, what with everything else that’s been going on -- all of the Todoroki drama, and Vestige revelations, and hospital antics, and political strife -- I feel like it’s easy to forget or overlook this little detail.

the fact is that AFO put this entire plan into motion solely in the hopes of finally obtaining OFA. every single thing that happened at Jakku -- Tomura powering up; Machia waking up and going on his rampage (after being ordered to do so by Tomura); and even Dabi/Touya choosing this moment to finally strike (because he knew this was when the reveal would do the maximum damage -- when people’s faith in heroes was already wavering) -- every last bit of it can ultimately be traced back to AFO’s desire to steal OFA. which, obviously, makes it AFO’s fault, not Deku’s. but then, Kamino wasn’t actually Katsuki’s fault either. it wasn’t his fault the villains went after him (but he blamed himself anyway), and it wasn’t his fault that people got hurt in the ensuing battle to save him (but he blamed himself anyway).

just. I think we’re underestimating just how strong of an impact all of this likely had on Deku. we haven’t really had the chance to see him process it yet. he’s been too busy, and there have been too many other things going on. but I’m telling you guys, that empty look in his eyes in the final page of the chapter? I can all but guarantee you that at least some of that emotional weight is coming from this.

sure would be nice if he had a friend who knew exactly what that was like, and could help him process the guilt and all of the other associated emotions, just like Deku once helped him. unfortunately I’m not so sure things will be that easy this time around. anyways though let’s move on to a couple of other thoughts and speculations.

2. “...and I bullied him.”

one of my least-favorite BnHA fanfic tropes is the one where the rest of class 1-A somehow finds out about Katsuki and Deku’s history -- i.e. that Katsuki bullied Deku throughout most of their childhood. mind you, it’s not the concept itself that I dislike; it’s mostly how it’s used. a lot of times it’s just an excuse to have all of the other kids turn on Katsuki and ostracize him; either because the author thinks that’s what he deserves, or else so that Deku can eventually come to his rescue and defend him and shame the rest of the class for not seeing how much he’s changed. either way, it’s usually pretty awkward to read, and more often than not the characters are pretty OOC (especially Ochako and Todoroki).

however! there’s a big difference between fanfic and canon, and just because I’m not a fan of this trope in the former doesn’t mean it couldn’t be executed well in the latter. and lately I’ve been thinking about this a lot. mainly for three reasons:

the recent (can we still call it recent?? well whatever) scene where Katsuki confessed to All Might that he used to bully Deku is now one of my favorite scenes in the entire series, and proof that this can be executed well.

both Todoroki and Deku have finally had their respective big secrets revealed to the rest of the class. so like, idk. feels like it just might be secret-revealing season now, you know?

and lastly, as a result of Deku’s secret about OFA finally being revealed, the rest of 1-A now either knows, or can extrapolate, that he used to be quirkless.

and from there, I feel like it’s not all that hard to put two and two together with how terrible Kacchan and Deku’s relationship was when they first started at UA. that’s not a terribly difficult puzzle to solve. so I feel like it might come out anyway, and if so, I’d prefer Bakugou telling them himself, and taking responsibility as part of his atonement process. because we know that he regrets it. we know their relationship has changed. we know that he has changed. and so I think I might like to see this.

alternately, if confessing to the entire class is too much, at the very least I could see him confessing to Shouto, because I’ve always felt like this was one of the big things that made Katsuki so resistant to letting Todoroki call him a friend. because I feel like there’s a part of Katsuki that saw the parallels between Endeavor’s abuse of Shouto and his own bullying of Deku, and thought, he wouldn’t be so quick to call me his friend if he actually knew the truth. and so there’s actually been this roadblock wedged between them this whole time that Shouto doesn’t even know about. because Shouto hates Endeavor. and so it’s not such a leap to assume he’d hate Katsuki too if he knew just how terrible he’d been to Deku when they were younger.

not that I think he actually would! actually I don’t think either of those things is actually true (because Shouto clearly doesn’t hate his father either, in spite of everything that’s happened). but the point isn’t what I think -- the point is what Katsuki thinks. and I really do think there’s a good chance he’s worried about Shouto hating him, and it’s one of the things that’s made him so reluctant to accept his friendship. anyway, so I’m really just rambling now, but you get my point. I don’t know if this is actually going to happen, but it’s a scene I would like to see if Horikoshi decides to indulge me.

3. “...so when you wake up, please give him my best.”

and now, as promised, back to Deku.

ngl guys, when I first saw this image, my immediate thought was that Gran must have died. because I mean, hello, leaving U.A.?? donning himself in his teacher’s old cape?? empty, exhausted look in his eyes?? what else were we supposed to think lol.

but maybe that was an overreaction. because when I think about it more, Gran’s death isn’t strictly necessary in order to push Deku over the edge. first of all, there’s already the whole “hero society is in ruins now because of you” thing I mentioned earlier. but also, there are just so many other things. like, let’s just list them here because omg. what a rough couple of days this kid had.

he was forced to battle TomurAFO and was terribly injured in the process (most of which was his own fault, but he wouldn’t have gone that far with OFA unless he felt like he had no choice)

and it wasn’t just him that was injured, either. in fact, even though he tried to act as bait to keep everyone else safe, he wasn’t able to stop three of the people closest to him from nearly being killed right before his eyes

and of course that last one was especially traumatic, because it was Kacchan, and because he had to watch Kacchan nearly die just to protect him. out of all the things that Deku witnessed in this arc, this might be the one that had the biggest impact on him

he was also basically helpless to do anything to protect Shouto and Endeavor when Dabi showed up. so again, we have this running theme of people he cares about being hurt and him not being able to save them

and he also got sucked into the OFA Interstellar Dream Vortex for a brief spell during the battle, during which he learned that AFO had possessed Tomura. more importantly, he learned that Tomura was Nana’s grandson, a fact which was only briefly touched on during that scene, but which I think wound up being the trigger to the whole avalanche that ended with Deku leaving UA. but more on that in a moment

anyway so just to wrap this all up, the battle eventually ended, Tomura got away despite all of their efforts, and then Deku wound up comatose in the hospital for two days. which brings us to the most recent chapters, during which

Deku learns that he will be the last wielder of OFA, whether he likes or not

Deku learns the identity of the last two mystery OFA users

and then at some point, he wakes up and presumably talks to Gran, and winds up with his cape

something happened during these last two scenes which helped to push Deku over the edge. I won’t delve into the matter of the Second or Third users for now, although most of you already know my suspicions regarding that, and I do think that would fit into the general pattern here (that is, the pattern of Deku feeling more and more strongly that he is putting the people around him in danger, and his fear of losing them becoming so overwhelming that it eventually pushes him to leave).

but that’s not what I want to talk about for now. what I want to talk about is Gran. specifically, what it is that Deku discussed with Gran. and this is where we come back to that reveal I mentioned earlier -- that Tomura is Nana’s grandchild.

basically, what I think happened is that Deku mentioned seeing Nana in the OFA Zany Psychedelic Spirit Void, which led to the topic of Tomura, and the fun fact Deku recently learned about him being related to Nana. this, in turn leads to Gran divulging his various regrets about everything that happened with him and Nana and Kotarou. his intent is to apologize to Deku for placing the burden of their failures on him. unfortunately, the part that Deku actually gets fixated on instead is this:

All for One hunted down and killed Nana’s son (and probably her husband as well), and stole her grandchild and psychologically tortured him into becoming a mass murderer, for no other reason than that Nana had once held OFA

in other words, AFO can and will hurt and kill anyone Deku is close to, anyone who has any kind of connection to him at all, without mercy, and regardless of whether it actually gives him any kind of tactical advantage or not. he’ll do it simply to hurt him. no other reason necessary.

I don’t know about you, but for me that would be a terrifying realization. and for Deku, I think it just might have been the tipping point.

so, let’s recap.

Deku learns that AFO is after him

AFO/Tomura very nearly kills several of Deku’s most important people, including Kacchan

and then he learns that this is just the tip of the iceberg, and realizes that all of their lives are still in danger and will continue to be as long as Deku is AFO’s target

and then add to all of this the misplaced guilt about society already being shambles, and the heroes already having more than enough to worry about. they’re barely holding things together as it is. and we already know how Deku feels about being a burden to them:

and so instead, he leaves. of course he does. in hindsight, I think this was inevitable.

the question is, did anyone else also put the pieces together in time to realize what Deku was planning before he actually left? specifically, did Katsuki, who understands Deku’s self-sacrificial nature better than anyone else, see the signs and put two and two together? like he did back at Jakku?

and if he did, would Deku have been willing to accept his help again?

somehow, I can’t help but think it might not be that easy this time.

anyway, so that was a lot of rambling, lol. sorry about that. I JUST HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS about all of this angsty shit. tired nomad Deku needs hugs and comfort and someone to reassure him that he doesn’t have to face this alone, and that everything is going to be all right. HE IS JUST A LITTLE BOY. this is too much, and I cannot handle any of these feels, and oh my god, somebody please help him.

[clairecrive]

"Sunshine" - Sirius Black x reader [Requested]

This is for the anon: Sirius/Remus (You pick) with reader who has problem expressing themselves, so they use stuffed animals? To elaborate they have a dog which is happy, bird which is excited, cat when lazy, frog when sad, owl when tired, and unicorn for confusion? I know it’s complicated, sorry if this was a waste of time, Wish you luck!

A/N: I end up choosing Sirius bc idk it felt more fitting. Hope you like this x

Warnings: nothing, this is pure fluff, maybe language

Word count: 1.4K ish

(let me know if you wanna be added to my taglist)

(not my gif)

"Hey sunshine, I got your frog. What's wrong?" you say when entering the boys' bedroom.

It was just after breakfast so everyone was either hurrying towards their lesson or already in class, leaving the dorms and in general the Gryffindor tower empty.

Well, almost empty considering you and your precious boyfriend were still here.

As a matter of fact, you were on your way to class when Sirius' patronus found you and handed you a frog. Knowing exactly what it meant, you turned around and hurried back down the corridors.

Now, it may sound weird for your boyfriend to send you a frog, out of all the things, but there was a reason. Neither you nor Sirius was very good at reaching out and asking for help when something happened. Since it was something you had in common, you couldn't really blame him. But, after the first month of you dating, it was causing more harm than good and you knew that it was something you needed to work on if this relationship was to go on.

So you talked about it and came up with an alternative system. One that didn't involve words and therefore made reaching out and express your feelings easier. And yes, it involved stuffed animals.  Well, when you were in the same room anyway. You restored to patronus when you were not together.

If anyone thought it weird that both of you started carrying around stuffed animals, they didn't show it. Even if they did though, neither of you would have cared much since this method was actually working and had, in fact, saved your relationship.

It was also a great way to quickly check on each other. Receiving a dog, meant the other was fine, happy even, a bird would mean that something exciting had happened or the other had exciting news to share, But a frog, not that was something you dreaded receiving.

It was bad news. It meant that something happened and the other needed comfort or at the very least for their significant other to be there for them.

Hence the reason you almost ran to Sirius, doing your best to skip the step of the stairs that lead to the boys' dormitory without falling on your face.

Last time you had seen Sirius was yesterday night before heading to bed. You had slept in and therefore missed breakfast. What could have gone wrong in such a short amount of time, you wondered. You just hoped that it wasn't anything gravely serious.

The sight that welcomed you when you finally reached him was disheartening, however.

Sirius was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He didn't move, nor when he heard your footsteps nor when you spoke. He just held up an open envelope for you to see and nothing else was needed. You knew what had put him in bad mood.

That goddammit psychotic abusive family of his.

Oh, how you hated them.

The idea that someone couldn't see how wonderful Sirius was and not only that but also the fact that they actively went out of their ways to send him hate and harmful letters even when he was far away and had cut any connections with them?

Fucking absurd.

Sighing, you walked to his bed and quickly stepped out of your shoes before lying next to him. "Do you want to talk about it?" you almost whispered.

Propping you heard on your hand, you gently moved away some of his curls away from his face. He was still not looking at you but he softly shook his head at your question.

Okay, you thought.

You lowered your hand to his face so that your fingers could start tracing his beautiful face. Leaving a small kiss on his temple, you reached out so that your arm was around him. Your kisses slowly moved all over his face. His other temple first, then his forehead. His nose. His cheeks. When it came to his lips, you stopped and just hovered over them.

Gently turning his face to yours, you waited for his eyes to meet yours before speaking. "They don't know the real you, my love."

If only he could see himself the way you saw him. If only he could see how false his family's words were.

"Everything they say is a blatant lie because they do not know you"- emphasis on not - "because if they did, the would agree with me."

The sadness and the hurt in his eyes were so evident that you had to fought tears back. You knew that this was something he had to face on his own and that your words were just that - words. Almost useless. But you had to do something and if there was even the tiniest chance that he'd actually listen to you then you'd try anyway.

"And you know what I think?" you smiled softly at him, your fingers trailing over his bottom lip, "I think that you're amazing. Precious even."

You were sure this was going to come back to bite you in the ass when he was feeling better. Merlin knows how Sirius' ego doesn't need to be stroked. At least, in public, that's how he behaved. But you knew him. You were lucky enough that he had let you in and showed you this side of him that no one knew existed outside his close circle.

He didn't say anything but his eyes didn't move from yours so you took it as a sign to keep going.

"There's no one out there who is so effortlessly brilliant like you are, my love." Leaning back a little from his face, you put some space between you after leaving the smallest of kisses on his lips."And I know for a fact that there is no one out there who cares about others like you do." Emphasizing with your eyes the "no one" part, you were able to coax the faintest of smiles for him.

You had noticed that your weird facial expressions amused him and apparently they worked in these situations too.

"Do you know why I call you sunshine?" You continued, a smile still on your face but your tone more solemn. You had a feeling that it was something he had wondered about since the most obvious choice would have been finding a nickname related to stars. And you knew how much Sirius was interested and fascinated by them.

"Yes, you're named after a star but I don't think it really matches your personality. See? Another proof that they don't know you at all." You lean back to sit on your feet.

"People don't notice stars unless they look up at the sky." Taking one of his hands in yours, you start playing with his fingers. "But you, my love? It would be impossible not to notice you, Sirius." Leaving a kiss on his palm, you intertwine your fingers and hold his hand close to your chest right where your heart is.

"You shine bright like the sun, making everyone around you aware of your presence. And yes, sometimes it can be annoying, but you know what?" At this, his smile grew a little knowing that what you were saying was more than true. Everyone knew that Sirius could also be spelt annoying on most days, especially during class. He got bored easily since he didn't need to study as much as everyone else to understand a concept. Thus, making it his mission to make someone do something with him that isn't studying.

"Everyone misses the sun when it's gone and never tire of it when it's there." Squeezing the hand you were holding, you hoped to have helped a little. Maybe you did, or maybe you didn't but all your efforts were rewarded when Sirius smiled at you. This time he gave you a real smile. As a consequence, yours got bigger.

Letting his hand go, you cradled his face in your hands and gently pulled him to you until your noses were touching. His hands, in turn, moved on your hips and used them to pull you to him as well so that you were now straddling him.

"Come here, you big sap." And pulled you even closer to him so that his face was now in the crook of your neck, his breath tickled your skin. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders in a tight embrace. Oh, how much you loved this boy.

"Only for you, my sunshine."

[sokkagatekeeper]

I think with zukka it’s the exact opposite as soulmates like in every way these two should’ve never even met let alone connect but they did and they do and they balance each other out in so many ways... them being together isnt fulfilling some serious destiny them being together is being able to let their guard down and being who they were never allowed to be: youthful, and playful... essentially when I think of zukka I think of laughter and the heaviness one’s heart feels when they’re nearly overwhelmed with happiness. No fate, no destiny, no titles... just being.

i think that in order to break down what sokka and zuko’s relationship means in relation to soulmates especially interpreting this relationship as romantic, we need to start with the basics. get ready for a long and probably pretty wordy ride.

let's start with the meaning of the word “soulmate” specifically in fandom. the most common perception of a soulmate in fandom is that your soulmate is quite literally the other half of your soul, meaning that without this romantic interest you are somehow incomplete. now, what the hell is a soul? according to my dear friend google, a soul is “the spirit or the essence of a person, and the part of the person that makes them who they are and will be even after death.” is it even possible to split a soul in half? well, in my opinion everyone in fandom is essentially insane, so i’d rather say that no, it is not possible for a soulmate to be the other part of your soul, or for another person fictional or otherwise to complete you as another person, fictional or otherwise (when it's fictional, a soulmate can add depth and nuance, maybe?? but not complete. what the fuck does complete even mean). i have a more interesting interpretation of the meaning of a soulmate at hand, specifically because my first language is spanish: the closest thing to the word “soulmate” in spanish is alma gemela, literally “twin soul.” i believe it is much more interesting to interpret a soulmate as a person whose soul is a mirror to yours, or a reflection. a complement. the notion that someone is perfect and made for you romantically is essentially full of shit and a very lazy mindset, but anyway. 

if we’re talking about being destined to meet a person, or being different faces of the same coin, or stuff like that, then of course this is a thing in fiction. aang and zuko and katara are definitely soulmates in terms of being destined to meet and change each other in a meaningful and earth-shattering way. the concepts of destiny and fate are not only an actual thing in atla, but also very prominent and loud in themes and narrative, and in the mindsets and beliefs of the characters themselves; it heavily influences their actions and approach to other characters, especially zuko. from his perspective, zuko’s dynamic with aang throughout the show and in general (meaning before and after he joined the gaang) is in part shaped by his sense of morality, and in part by his belief that his destiny is somehow intertwined with aang’s (he was right, of course), similarly to how katara approached aang (too, as a beacon of hope) or even how she saw zuko as a definitive enemy (in contrast to how sokka saw zuko as pretty much a fool and a recurrent inconvenience) aang, katara, and zuko’s dynamics with each other are all somehow related to destiny, the general concept of soulmates as a mirror of your soul, whether consciously or unconsciously. this is part of what makes them the central thematic trio and the heart of the show.

knowing all this, let’s go back to sokka and zuko. in short, as i’ve said before, to each other they are just… some guys. to elaborate, to sokka, zuko was just 1) some guy in the way, another inconvenience that occasionally got in between him and in his business with the avatar, whom he didn’t respect at all and didn’t think of as an enemy, 2) just some guy to be wary of for all of the aforementioned reasons, and 3) some guy, but cool and nice and a friend, possibly a love interest?? idk we’ll see!! meanwhile to zuko, sokka was 1) some guy in the way, another inconvenience that occasionally got in between him and in his business with the avatar, whom he didn’t respect at all and didn’t think of as an enemy, 2) some guy, who is amazing and cool and he will break into a prison with him because why not?? so we can safely say, while there are direct parallels between them and are definitely connected in some spiritual way (as are all of the gaang, in my opinion!!), sokka and zuko themselves do not know that. the weight of being meant-to-be in their relationship is nonexistent, and i definitely agree that they can relax around each other in that sense, especially zuko (who believes in destiny therefore i mention him a lot, in comparison to sokka who does not believe in destiny therefore doesn’t carry the weight of anf his relationships being shaped by it which. they arguably are, as it is a story that was predefined, but that’s for another day). it’s been talked about that the most compelling thing about sokka and zuko’s relationship revolves around the concept of choice. the boiling rock is the only life-changing field trip that zuko was initially denied, but insisted on going anyway. he decided to go out of pure selflessness, solely to help sokka, in contrast to him being quite literally required to go as aang’s teacher/to prove himself and get katara off his back (as well as other subconsious reasons, that, too, for another day). zuko went with sokka because he thought he was dope, and as we all know zuko cannot do anything half-way so he decided he would die for the guy (valid of him, by the way). their entire relationship is just subversion after subversion after subversion.

it’s also related to sokka being just some guy, not only as he believes himself to be but also how sokka is pretty much the fourth part of the thematic triangle that aang katara and zuko have going on. he balances each of their pure hearts and idealism with a sharp mind and bitchy but useful pessimism. sokka being just some guy to zuko’s deuteragonist is the thematic equivalent of sokka being a main character and suki being a secondary character. it works because the weight of universal forces just isn’t there, and it works better than (in my opinion!!) katara and zuko or (to a lesser degree) aang and katara being romantically involved for the same reasons.

and anyway. when it comes to fandom interpretation, it’s very easy to think of every parallelism/symbolism as a sign of two characters being meant to be together romantically, or whatever. and while it is fun, most parallels (at least among the gaang) are mostly to show how the characters are able to understand and connect with each other whether romantically or platonically (and the destiny in fiction thing i’m too tired to talk about again), so the parallels between sokka and zuko are not entirely irrelevant to their romantic potential — people are also quick to think every parallel/trope/catchy line about their relationship is shallow and stupid and soulmates suck anyway!! and therefore i’m asking you all to calm down and find a middle ground. not every parallel/trope/etc is romantic and not every parallel/trope/etc is dumb and irrelevant. when it comes to the infamous “prince and the fool” for example, some people take it as the ultimate proof of their love and some think it’s utter nonsense and a cheap version of the zvtara’s moon/sun dynamic. and both of them are wrong!! “the prince and the fool” is in fact pretty much like “the wise and the brave” of katara and sokka. it is merely a descriptive of the way they act with each other, the way their differences balance each other, the way they contrast each other, etc etc. they do work as descriptive on their own, but not as well as they work when put together; yes, sokka is wise, but how wise? what is the standard for him to be considered wise, or even the opposite? sokka being wise works in terms of aesthetic, character, dynamic, etc etc, only if katara is being brave right besides him. zuko is a prince, sure, but what else is there? what is the alternative? you can call sokka a fool (and you would be wrong, by the way) but what does that word alone bring to his character? 

to conclude, i believe the thing about sokka and zuko’s relationship is that there’s nothing definitive to it by universal order — or rather, while it might exist, it's definitely to a lesser degree than other relationships in their lives, therefore the characters themselves don't notice it and there's no pressure to fulfill any prophecies; they just are, and they just do. you can have a passionate and true love without it being the sole meaning of your existence, or your sole motivation and priority in your life. it’s clear that in case they were romantically involved they wouldn’t even be the person they love the most (as it is very clear the person sokka loves the most is katara (!!!), while zuko’s is probably iroh?? idk). i believe the best part of a romantic relationship between sokka and zuko is that they are just some guys, maybe not to the universe but to each other. if they have to choose each other as they do, if they just get each other as well as they do, who care about each other a shit ton even if not any more than their other friends and family but just a little differently, while they aren’t canonically soulmates the way aang and zuko or aang and katara are (while the potential is there) i’d go as far as to say they are some sort of kindred spirits. i think it all depends on how you define soulmates, really.

[eldritchsurveys]

996.

5k Survey LXVI

3351. True or false: When someone hates you it is because: they're jealous of you? the things you say are frightening to them because what you say makes them think about things they would rather avoid thinking about? they don't understand you? >> It could be any of those reasons, sure, but sometimes it really is about you, lmao. Sometimes you really can straight-up do something that makes someone else royally pissed off at you and you can choose to take responsibility for it or not. 3352. True or false: When you hate someone it is because: you're jealous of them? the things they say are frightening to you because what they say makes them think about things you would rather avoid thinking about? you don't understand them? >> I don’t hate anyone, per se, but there are people I’ve disliked for the first and third reasons (not too sure about the second, can’t think of any examples). I don’t make it their problem, though, because it obviously has more to do with me than them. 3353. Have you ever been fascinated by someone who hated you? >> I don’t know. Gonna guess not, but it’s possible, I guess. 3354. Since the human brain has defense mechanisms against feeling bad (meaning the brain lies to itself to avoid feeling bad about something it said or did) how can we ever know if we are truly being honest? How do we know our brains are not tricking us into believeing we are good people when we aren't all good?/ >> Well, I don’t bother with considering myself “good” in the first place, so at least there’s that. Being aware of the defenses and rationalisations that the brain invents to protect itself helps to remind me that just because I see a situation one way doesn’t necessarily mean that the other person’s viewpoint (where I was in the wrong) is wrong either.  3355. How highly do you value innovation? >> I mean, not very? I like technology and shit but there are a lot of other things I wish society would focus on more intensely.

3356. Is there a name where all the people you've ever met haveing that name had something in common with each other(ex. all the jens you've ever met had blue eyes)? >> I don’t know, I’ve never thought about this and it would take a lot of effort to try and think of a pattern like that right now. 3357. Are you focused more outward or inward? >> Inward. 3358. What is the most affectionate nickname you ever came up with for someone? >> Liebling is probably the most affectionate thing I’ve called someone. 3359. Are the questions STILL still interesting this deep into the survey? >> The ratio of interesting to not-interesting questions is definitely skewing more towards the latter as it goes on. For me, at least. 3360. If someone else makes their desicions based on their intuition instead of on facts and proofs what do you think of that person? >> I think of people on a case-by-case basis, and this isn’t a detailed enough example for me to make a judgement. 3361. Do you trust your own intuition? >> I don’t know if I have any. 3362. Finish the phrase... danger is the: just keep: never trust: the way I live my life: don't change: maybe someday: 3363. Would you rather live in Frodo's world or Harry Potter's? >> I find Tolkien’s realm far more interesting than Rowling’s. That isn’t to say I’d want to live there, though... well, maybe if I could be an elf... or a Maiar. IDK. 3364. Do you believe that the dead are with us? If yes in what form? >> I haven’t formed an opinion. I, personally, have had no encounters with the dead that I know of (aside from Inworlders, of course). 3365. Do you believe that those who haven't been born are with us? If yes, in what form? >> I’ve never even thought about this. That, I think, would make slightly less sense. 3366. Are you made of timid stuff? >> I don’t think so? 3367. Is there anyone in this world who is not CRAZY? >> --- 3368. What word becomes shorter when you add two letters to it? >> Short. 3369. Can you mashed potatoe? Can you do the twist? >> I can do the latter but not the former. 3370. What does your family do for thanksgiving..or if you don't celebrate it what do you picture when you think of thanksgiving? >> Sparrow and I go to her parents’ house for Thanksgiving. Otherwise, I’d be perfectly content to not celebrate it at all (except to watch the parade highlights online, I guess, because I do still have a soft spot for that stupid thing). 3371. What is your earliest memory? >> Mehhh. 3372. Have you ever taken an IQ test? What'd you get? What do you think of those things? >> I was given one as a child, but I was never told the results. Which is just as well, because I grew up to despise the entire concept anyway. 3373. How do you make 'fishcakes'? Put the potatoe in the fish... >> What? 3374. Which is the better band..the offspring or the damned? >> I don’t care about “better”. I’m not familiar with The Damned (I know what they look like but not what they sound like), but I quite like The Offspring. 3375. Do you ever think about world destruction? >> Not really. 3376. Do you think humans are becoming more robotic? >> No????? 3377. Do you think we'll ever be replaced by robots? >> That’s a really absurd concept to me, if I’m honest. 3378. What do you feel a part of? >> Er. 3379. Does it freak you out to know that yogurt is ALiVe?? >> No, dude... 3380. What current band do you think is doing something particularly interesting or innovative? >> Obviously my fave, Zeal & Ardor ~ 3381. Golf course, do you remember? >> What... 3382. Which is more important, books and cleverness or friendship and bravery? >> ... 3383. If i promise to miss you, will you go away? >> ........ 3384. stool, ball, powder...Can you think of a 4th word that connects these three? >> No. 3385. Who's afraid of the big bad wolf? >> Hm. 3386. Why are blondes considered 'dumb'? >> I don’t know how that got started, but you could always google it. 3387. What's more important..intuitiveness/creativity or factual knowledge and practicallity? >> Why would one be more important than the other? 3388. Who are the two worst terrorists you can think of? >> ... 3389. What is jello made of? >> Bones. *shrug* idk, man. 3390. Pick a country: What do you believe is wrong with that country? >> Wow. 3391. Do you have strong opinions? >> Not usually. 3392. Do you do what it takes to stand up for those opinions? >> If I manage to have an opinion about something, I don’t see why I would need to fight with anyone about it. If someone has an opposing opinion that makes me feel unsafe (you know, racist opinions, that sort of thing), then I make sure not to deal with those people. 3393. Have you ever been to a rally, protest or demonstration? If yes was it effective and in what ways? >> Yeah. I don’t know if it was effective or not, it was so long ago I don’t even remember what it was for. 3394. When people say, 'yeah it sucks but there's nothing I can do' do you believe them? >> I mean, yeah? A lot of things aren’t in the average person’s control. 3395. Do you know what you can do to make this world a better place? Do you care? >> I’m not out to make this world a better place. Not to say that I want to actively make it worse, I just... am not focused on the world. I’m focused on my immediate life. 3396. Why is peace so important anyway? Why is freedom important? >> ... I mean......... 3397. As long as you have your house and your family and you can go to the movies and the mall who cares about peace and freedom. Right? >> That’s not my point of view, no. 3398.Do you try to avoid anything involving work? >> Kind of, lmao. 3399. If you are not actively wrking to stop the horrors and injustices of the world (war, hunger, poverty) than aren't you partially responsible for them? >> I don’t know, dude. Maybe I am. We’ll see how my points add up on Judgement Day, I guess. 3400. Are you in denial? >> About what?

[kurogabae]

TSUBASA: TRAINWRECK CHRONICLES

And Why Bee Train Are Officially Being Labeled, By Me, As The Boomers Of Animation

PART 1 – PART 2 – PART 3 -- Part 4

[Slim Shady’s “Guess Who’s Back” plays in the distance, muffled but threatening]

Look, I know I usually have something to say at the start of these, but honestly? Let’s just go because we’re starting knee-deep in some bullshit. 

Tsarastora (yes... fucking AGAIN):

Well, it didn’t take long for us to return to the land of the walking Not Dead Anymore. Rumor has it that Bee Train was ordered to retcon the S1 finale immediately because who do you think you are to break one of CLAMP’s cardinal rules like that?!? But I’ve never seen any proof of exactly what went down about this plot. But I’m forced to believe Ohkawa materialized behind the director one day and threatened to eat his spine or some shit. 

Anyway. We’re here. Again. And for some reason this is where they decide to have Sakura give Yuuko her White Day gift? Instead of in Piffle? Where she made it? With Tomoyo?

Stop stealing my moments Bee Train. It’s like you’re the crew who edited CCS for America back in the day and tried to market it towards boys so you pushed Syaoran as the main character and tried to remove all romance. Let Sakura have friends! Let her interact with people and have a story! LET HER BE BI!!!

So Yuuko has a dress and Fai makes a joke about being in heaven because the place is so pretty and Kurogane says not to, quote, “say such unlucky things” and it’s moments like this that make you wonder if they Knew and just didn’t care about Fai’s past or if they really were just as in the dark as the rest of us. I flip flop a lot between the two. 

Either way, now the dads are talking about the kids and how brave Syaoran is (why the bullshit in Piffle prompted this I do not know but whatever I guess?) and basically just about how badly they want them to succeed but without just saying it. Meanwhile Sakura is telling Syaoran about her latest memory and I could not for the life of me tell you which one it was and I refuse to go check. The important thing here is that the lazy animation trick that has given Mokona the power of flight is back and she’s hovering around the gang now. Not sitting on shoulders or anything. Just... flying around like she’s Kero. This is fine. I guess.

And then, after what has to be like a solid half hour of just dicking around Mokona Very Suddenly senses a feather. Why so suddenly? Because they wanted to get everything else out of the way first and it was convenient. No other reason. The feather isn’t moving. Neither are they really. She just decides to turn her sensors on now? IDK. Maybe she needs a tune up.

They find the feather not far away just casually sitting inside a rock and everyone but Kurogane is like “Yay! Easy find! Go us!” because apparently no one can learn anything in this anime about what those fucking feathers do. Spoilers: it’s not a rock, it’s a dragon.

[Kurogane voice]: kin

The dragon fucks off and here we come to a Thing. Now, Kurogane is ready to slaughter this thing and wear its bones basically. He is Ready to Fight in a real way. I found that odd and really didn’t care for it. In Hanshin he seems in awe of Celes when it appears to him and even though it’s mostly fanon that Kurogane respects and likes dragons that makes sense. His family’s guardian was a dragon, his sword was modeled after a dragon. His whole motif is dragons! Why is he so ready to kill this one? Does it not count if it’s not a Nihon dragon? Does only Ginryuu get respect? It just feels bad???

But none of that matters because guess what! Dragon shaped as it might be, the thing is a demon? At least, that’s what they’re calling it. Sometimes. Fai says demon, Syaoran says dragon. They don’t.... agree on the term? Shut up. It’s a dragon.

So they soon realize that they are back in Should Be Very Dead-ville and oh no everyone is going to die again unless we get this OTHER feather because if one feather can buy us a month of living surely one more will fix our deaths forever right? ....right? (On a side note; Fai makes a comment about how weird it is that two feathers fell in the same world while he’s from Celes and knows damn well he found two and is unaware of a third!!!) 

Either way the family is gonna help because, you know. Feather. If memory serves, the dragon is hiding in a lake, so what does Kurogane (who is now in charge because of course) have them do? They set the lake on fucking fire. And it delights him. It do not, however, delight the dragon, who, understandably, goes apeshit. Luckily, no one dies and they just hack off the horn that the feather was stuck in. And then they... take it to God again because wow they really do think this will work. Sakura, honey, I know how sweet you are but it only got them one month last time. What good will this do?

The answer is no good!

God basically tells them it’s tough tits, the month long visitation was all they could manage and no matter how many super powered magic bird parts they bring the dead are dead and that’s that. Which sucks for those villagers but haha, bummer for FAi to have to hear. Again. After watching Sakura wish someone to life with a mere piece of her soul. Again. Wonder how that felt. (Short post about Kurogane and Fai’s possible feelings here.)

So to end the episode, Sakura gets her feather back and then the family leaves town but sticks around on the outskirts to watch everyone fucking die again like some sick ass fuckers!!!

I’m not even going to talk about the stupid memory she gets with papa!Clow and learning about how death is a Thing via her dead pet bunny. It happens. It’s inorganic. I hate it. Shut up Clow.

The episode is over and I’ll leave you with this to heal your souls.

I am a simple woman.

Portoria:

WE’RE ON A BOAT MOTHA FUCKER!

If you’re too young to recognize that joke, click the link for... an experience. Wear headphones. Everyone else, please join me in this not-a-Wind-Waker-AU. 

We’re gonna skip all of my bad sailor jokes and focus for a minute on Kurogane’s Sinbad cosplay here because yes good hello I am easily distracted. 

Anyway, the captain is this world’s version of Koryo’s shitty Ryanban and Kurogane and Fai have a moment to wax philosophical about whether or not souls are inherently good or evil, which is fine and I would hardly mention if, while they were doing this, the “camera” wasn’t stood still on an image of Syaoran and Sakura just... smiling at each other while the dads spoke. Like the kids aren’t even doing anything, they’re just smiling. It’s weird. It’s also almost like accidental foreshadowing because HAHA THOSE ARE CLONES! But I’m not gonna go into it for the sake of this joke.

On the ship everyone has to work, Kurogane is terrorizing his new shipmates into compliance under his leadership, Fai and Sakura are cooking fish, and Syaoran is in the engine room with a child version of Fujitaka AKA his father. Understandably, Syaoran is Feeling Emotions, not that the animation is any indicator of this. He also calls a ten year old daddy so things are going great. 

Now yes, Syaoran must miss his father terribly, not only has he been dead for who knows how long exactly (anywhere upwards of 5 years possibly) but Syaoran is far from home without any pictures or familiarity to remind him of Fujitaka, and now he’s got some savant elementary schooler who is an AU version of his dad basically sharing his deepest hopes and dreams.  It’s a weird episode. Oh, and there is no feather, but Mokona is sweet as can be and stays so Syaoran can get to know this version of Fujitaka. Which honestly seems more like a punishment than anything to me, but hey. 

Also, there’s a sea monster. And a haunted island. And something that sounds suspiciously like Piedmon from Digimon. 

Syaoran and Fujitaka get stranded on the island after getting yeeted overboard and the captain telling the rest of the family that his ancestors forbid people from going to the island is enough to stop a rescue mission? Like. Kurogane AND Sakura are sitting there, letting nothing happen. This is fine. Everything is fine. 

And it kinda is because the island if filled with old shit and Syaoran is geeking out like a kid surrounded by his special interest would be expected to. 

In the end, the creepy laughter was wind, the island isn’t haunted, the family tries to row out to save Syaoran and a sea monster is on screen for all of 30 seconds. This episode was boring. Dull. It wasn’t even particularly angsty because Bee Train has no concept of emotional DEPTH!! Their expressions and emotions are as flat as Fai’s ass and as dry as Clow’s deserts. This could have been a very moving and fascinating filler episode, but Bee Train remains in capable of doing ANYTHING AT ALL EVER! I’m bored. This is boring.

At least Sakura looked cute in her little sailor outfit. 

The next episode is “A Date With a Wizard” and that shitshow is getting its own post. Peace. 

PART 1 – PART 2 – PART 3 -- Part 4

[bigskydreaming]

So this is...its a thing. Let’s go with that. I’ve been calling around LA for pretty much all of last week, going through every oral surgeon I can find to see if they do the surgery I need and what their schedules are like, how soon I could get into surgery, etc, and also I’ve been asking literally everyone I know if they know of anyone, have a referral, etc. Even reached out to this old client of mine from back when I was doing sex work, years and years ago, to see if he knew anyone in LA with connections at Cedars Sinai or another hospital, like, to see if they could even just check with their hospital to see what visiting doctors specialize in that kinda thing. Keeping in touch with people from my sex work days, lol, is not something I normally did, or do. He’s literally the only one, and that’s because it just....kinda happened? *Shrugs* He's not a regular presence in my life or anything like that, just the only one from those days that for various reasons, I kinda kept in casual contact with - which for me pretty much meant that I called him or he called me like, a couple times a year to just be like hey how you been. And it’d been a couple years to be honest, cuz like....*gestures at the last two years* 

LOLOL. I guess I just have very low standards for people keeping in contact with me. Who knows why. One of those inexplicable mysteries I guess.

But point is, he got back to me like, the same day, and acted as a go between for me with this old friend of his, who works at Cedars Sinai as a chaplain, their non-denominational one...last week, at the time, I was only focused on the advice part of the email he sent after he asked around the hospital for recommendations, and it kinda didn’t even register that this guy wasn’t just....had connections at Cedars Sinai, but was actually working there himself (for some reason, I thought he was in a different state when first put in contact with him, whatever). Let alone what his title there was. So he gave a recommendation that I’m following up on today, and I just called the old client of mine who put me in touch with him to clarify a few things he’d say, and it only then hit me where this friend of his worked, and so I asked how long he’d worked there and turns out it was two years.

Which was...when my aunt killed herself. And that was where she worked.

So. Like. This random guy who I’ve never met before, doing a favor for me as a favor for this guy who used to pay me for sex and kinda almost accidentally ended up as like...a casual but distant friend, is literally the guy who was hired to replace my aunt as the non-denominational chaplain at Cedars Sinai when she died two years ago.

And I don’t have the first fucking clue what to do with that?

Like....I’ve always considered myself ‘comfortably agnostic,’ like I’m more than willing to believe a higher power exists, I’m just not all that concerned with forming a definitive idea of what that might be or look like or want. I hate organized religion with a passion because lol, repressive Catholic upbringing, and I’ve just never felt a particular need to go out and look for faith in anything other than myself and like....the things in life I actually value, y’know? I’m of the mindset that like, I figure if I do things cuz they’re the right things to do and try and live a good life where I’m helpful to people and empathetic and compassionate, whatever that Higher Power’s specific deal is, they’re either gonna decide that’s good enough for them when I die, or if its not good enough on its own merits, like...idk why I would even want anything from them or anything to do with them anyway? Like sure God, send me to hell because the only thing that really matters in the end is I didn’t sign up for your official email mailing list or whatever the fuck. Nope. 

So religion and faith and spirituality have never been a big...thing for me, or part of my life, its not something I really feel like, a void for not having or whatever. I don’t have an issue with what anyone else believes or why, up until the point where their personal faith apparently requires them to like....impinge upon my actual life and ability to live it the way I choose to....but I’m not like that dude who goes around trying to poke holes in peoples’ faith, just like...respect that I’m not interested in a sales pitch and we’re cool, y’know? Like my aunt was a chaplain, literally the only person in my family who ever kept in regular contact and like, made a point to check on how I was doing and shit and like...idk, loved me, is I guess the word to use? LMFAO. But like....yeah, she was the only relative I actually felt valued by, and thus the only one I really had anything like a regular or ongoing relationship with....*shrugs* So like yeah, whatever. She believed things that I don’t necessarily NOT believe, but more just have never felt a need to explore or try and decide just WHAT exactly I believe or put a name or a description to it.

And I’ve never been someone who sees signs in stuff that happens, nooooooot a fan of fate or destiny as a general concept and like....I’ve got no problem believing that things like ghosts or demons or anything like that could exist, y’know, things that just can’t be explained by science or anything near to our current understanding of reality at least....I’ve just never had anything remotely close to something I would describe as an encounter with the supernatural, or demonic or divine or anything really...spiritual, I guess?

So.....I don’t know what to feel about this, lol. Like, I’m trying not to read anything into it, like y’know....a sign, haha, not because I wouldn’t like to think that my aunt is still looking out for me in some way, I guess, maybe? Like, of course I’d like to think that, I miss her. A lot. And actually have been randomly thinking about her a bunch lately, like at weird times like, I don’t know what it is that made me stop and think of her, my thoughts go there? So I mean....I’m just saying....it wouldn’t break my brain or upend my entire worldview to accept that could actually happen or be a thing, its more just that I’ve gotten my hopes up so many damn times this past year in specific, that I’m just like....I cant afford to pin my hopes on THIS, like that this is ‘a sign’ that this time, its going to work out? But at the same time, its SO FUCKING SPECIFIC a connection like, and in such a WEIRD fucking round about way, that its pretty much impossible NOT to try and read something into it? Like, the guy who replaced her never even MET her, she’s literally just the woman who had his office before him and well. Is probably just remembered as a depressing story around the hospital, to be totally honest, cuz like, there’s not a lot of follow up that tends to happen when you ask so what happened to her and the answer is well, she killed herself, y’know?

So its like, how do you not get your hopes up even just a little bit, from thinking about that......which I figure means, oops, further to fall and crash and burn if this lead fizzles out too and I got my hopes up for nothing, but if it does pan out, like....I guess that’s kinda the point of faith in a higher power in the first place, lol, to hope for better or believe that there’s a point to all this or a place this all is headed, idk.

But then also now I just fucking miss her too, like, even more than usual, and thinking the shit I’ve tried really really really goddamn hard not to think about for the past two years, like how I know she had her own mental health struggles and even physical health issues, and I know better than to fucking blame her and yet there’s that part of me that wants to fucking throw a tantrum about how i need her and how could she leave me alone with just the rest of my useless fucking joke of a family, but then there’s the other part of me that’s like well I obviously wasn’t the help she needed either, so its not like I’ve got any right to think I was owed her presence or help or anything like that, its just. Idk. I miss her. I need her. I love her, like there’s so many things I want to tell her that I never got the chance to because I didn’t just fucking take the chances I had when they were actually available and there are so many more things I wish she’d told me, and just. I knew she cared, at least. No matter how detached I felt from the rest of my family or just like...fuck family in general, lol, she was the one person there who I never doubted like...just cared. About me. Gave a shit, showed up, wanted me to actually be happy and wanted that to look like whatever I wanted it to look like, didn’t give a fuck what other people thought my happiness should look like or require.

And its just like, maybe this is just a really weird, strange, major coincidence or maybe its a sign of something or proof of something and maybe it doesn’t even matter, bc like...I was just gonna say that its not like I even NEED the answers or to know, but like lol, dumbass, the fact that I’m actually asking the questions or getting worked up over whether or not I actually believe this means something or I just WANT to believe it means something, like, would tend to suggest I’m shitting myself and I DO actually want the answers which suggests maybe I’m not actually as agnostic or at least not comfortable with being agnostic as I’ve told myself, which....oh fucking hell. Am I having an existential crisis? Is that what this is? Jfc I better not be having a fucking spiritual awakening or whatever the fuck, like that is not what I need, this is NOT the time for that, literally nobody asked and I should know, Ive been here the whole time and nope nope nope this guy is not your ‘but the real salvation came from finding strength and purpose in something greater than myself in my most dire time of need’ narrative or whatever like I FUCKING REFUSE, my belief system can go to the BACK OF THE LINE until I’m good and ready to deal with it on MY time, I didn’t sign on to do a rewrite of some modernized Book of Job shit, literally any other thought in my brain is invited to step the fuck right up because THANK YOU, NEXT, I just willingly made an Ariana Grande reference because I can think of nothing more suitably over the top dramatic short of tossing my hair which is much too short to toss but again I insist nooooooooooooooope.

Like, love you and miss you Aunt Diane, and if that is you looking out for me plz know I’m very grateful even tho it totally doesn’t sound like it, but like, you know me well enough to know that I like....object to this timing and context on principle, WHICH YES HELLO I AM AWARE SOUNDS FUCKING STUPID NOW THAT IM TYPING IT OUT YET IT PERSISTS SO LIKE WHATEVER AND STUFF....just. I am me, and thus I shall super gratefully take like....just a smidgen of hope and optimism or whatever from this offering so like, I don’t want to be RUDE, but then Im gonna put the rest of it back in its box and shove it alllll the way to the back of my Pressing Priorities and unpack all that at a very fucking much later date, thank you ever so much, because like....I gotta be me, and I have been partners in crime with my Cynicism for way too long to just bail on him now, like, what kind of person would I be if I just cut and run on the anthropomorphized negative outlook that has helped see me through life oh so jadedly until now? 

Ugh wtf, why am I like this, is it free will or is it God or is God even real or did Cthulu eat god or is God’s actual name Sonya and like I have no clue where I’m going with any of this, look the answer is obviously that a faithless blasphemous heretical fucker has phone calls to make today, and nobody’s finding the light here, nope, nope, NOOOOOPE, my motel’s one shitty lightbulb works GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME.

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

5 YEARS WITH BTS (aka bangtan sonyeondan aka beyond the scene aka bangtan boys and bulletproof boy scouts aka b- let’s... let’s just call them bts lol) - A WAY TOO LONG POST ABOUT 1 GIRL’S LOVE FOR 7 DORKS

So I’m just gonna begin this by saying how proud of everything BTS has achieved, not just in the past year or so but in all 5 years they’ve been blessing us with their music...

Second thing I wanna say is that this post is LONG so.... I’m inserting a read more encase anyone aside from me from the future wants to read my rambles about a group of 7 dorks who stole my heart lol...

I discovered them roughly in the early to middle part of 2014, Boy in Luv being the first song I heard of theirs (Ithink... my memory’s kinda hazy lol) & I remember really liking the song (wasn’t as keen on the mv but yeah...)

(I also listened to Bulletproof pt 2 & No More Dream at some point & I really liked them... idk when that was but... yeah... I also vividly remember laughing at the No More Dream mv where RM’s introducing the members and he says Jungkook’s name really quickly at the end? As if he’d run out of space in the intro to fit his name in lol... like ‘shit i only have a second to fit Jungkook in quick gotta say his name real fast’ lol... maybe I’m the only one that finds that funny idk ANyWAy back to the story)...

Fast forward to August 2014 when Danger & the Dark and Wild album were realised, and lemme tell you how that Blew. My. Mind.

Danger was really unlike anything I’d heard in k-pop at the time... I loooooved the grungy/rock vibes mixed with hip hop, which perfectly matched the dark mv & aggressive but sharp dance moves... I just remember thinking ‘wow, these guys are really gonna go far if they keep this up’ (or something like that, guys it was 4 years ago I can barely remember what I was thinking 4 seconds ago let alone anything else lol)

Also, at that point in time I’d heard a lot of great k-pop albums (XOXO by EXO, Crush by 2NE1, Overdose (mini album) by EXO, Red Light by f(x), Mama (mini album) by EXO, etc etc) but genuinely, I was so impressed by this album, & immediately downloaded it despite knowing little to nothing about the group (only things I knew were that one of the members was called V, which i found hilarious lol) just because the music and the entire layout of the album was so brilliantly done!

(would like to mention at this point that my favourite tracks from Dark & Wild were Look Here, Rain and Let Me Know... 3 songs that are still some of my fav BTS songs tbh)

Fast forward again to 2015, maybe near the beginning? where I still didn’t know the members names (well, I knew Rap Mon (who could forget), V and I think I knew Suga... I was following a few blogs who were armies & they’d often use the members actual names so I was constantly like ‘WHO IS THIS YOONGI YOU SPEAK OF WHAT IS A YOONGI’ lol)... tbh idk when that changed, but at some point in 2015 I decided to sell my soul to BTS & officially became an army...

(i was technically a fan of them before, but I hadn’t dedicated much of my life to them at that point u know? there’s a fine line between ‘moderately like a thing’ and ‘SUDDENLY MY REASON TO BREATHE IS THIS THING’... & that line took about a year to cross in this case lol)

Fast forward (we’re fast forwarding to the interesting bits, since most of the rest of my actual life was really boring or really depressing lol...) to about August 2015 & we have my first artwork of BTS &, surprise surprise it’s of Jimin... (based on the Dope teaser pictures cos red haired jimin will always be legendary lbr)...

Anyway, you always know you’re gone for a group or artist when you start doing fanart, so through 2015 I probably did another 2? fanarts of Jimin & one of Taehyung (I also think I tried to draw Jungkook at one point but failed lol...)... The real Problem(tm) started in 2016.

I started the year with a Jimin fanart, and then went on to start a BTS series based on my fav songs by them... and then proceeded to not finish said series lol (story of my life)... BUT, in April of 2016 I did manage to finish a BTS series, based on the Young Forever mv (& the whole concept of that era) which I’m actually still proud of tbh...

Anyway, so 2016 was when I realised that I really like drawing Jimin... like...a lot.... & then 2017 I just continued that up until now (currently 12 of June 2018) I have drawn him 63 times, not counting traditional drawings or random sketches I’ve done..... I have a serious problem I know

Throughout that time I also made about 5 other BTS series (2 of which are based on the Wings solo tracks because they are the GREATEST tbh), as well as countless solo member (or duo member) artworks... so far I’m at about 140, but to be honest that will never be enough to express how much I love these guys... Unfortunately, as a fanartist, my art is really all I can do to express that love so... Cheers to another 140 eh?

So... what’s my point in writing this? Other than the fact I’m really bored & just felt like it?

Well, to be honest, I’m not gonna say that I’d be a shell of a person without them in my life or anything... I think I probably could’ve had an alright life if I had never decided to make my life’s work to draw Jimin at least 200 times before I die... In fact, maybe I’d be a more productive person? Maybe I’d socialise more or maybe I’d stop procrastinating revision so much idk... 

Regardless of those facts, BTS have given me so much inspiration, not just in my art exploits, but also in my own far off, completely unattainable dreams of becoming some kind of musician in the future... 

Music has always been an important part of my life (I actually gave up learning music academically because it clashed with German lessons... I gave up music for culture... now look at me... Ich bin sehr doof, ja?) but I never considered I’d be able to pursue it as more than just a part time hobby... Enter BTS, with their wide eyed determination and optimism, with their talk of dreams and working hard to achieve what you want in life... 

A group of crazy boys, with equally crazy personalities, with a mish-mash bag of talents, who came together in a small company, in a time when k-pop was becoming more and more competitive... And they just came out and did what they loved, they were unashamed to sing and rap about the issues they’d gone through, issues in their own culture and society, they sang about their passions and their loves, they sang about their regrets and the times when they felt hopeless... They’re completely honest, they make mistakes, they have flaws, but they’re proof that people can change and become better people when they’re educated about certain things! 

They’re not perfect, but that’s the point... 

They’re just us, a group of ordinary people who had a couple dreams, and tried their god damn hardest to reach those dreams.... And if I can live my life with even half of that level of enthusiasm and dedication, I know I’ll go far...

Thank you so so much BTS for making me consider new paths that my life may go, for not just settling with the comfortable or the mundane, for striving for something more, for something actually exciting... 

You’ll never know what you mean to me, or to any of army, but I will forever be grateful for the impact you unknowingly made on my life... 

[cowboylikedean]

look, the tix thing is complicated and on the one hand, the pricing here is not more outrageous than the 1989 tour prices and i’ll forever be bitter as hell i was the only one yellling bout the 1989 tour being double the cost of the red tour for so many fewer dates

it is and has always been DISGUSTING that we were lead to believe we could buy a presale code with boosts and that people who didn’t have the money to buy boosts (and however fair it was before albums were released... LOL if you can say money wasn’t a factor after) weren’t gonna get presales

and then for people wo have worked hard and bought more albums than they would have and spent more money than they would have just to learn they are still not guarenteed a code... yah... that’s disgusting... truly.

but i just think like 99% of the anger is performative and for the sake of being angry. because 99% of the psosts i’m seeing aren’t saying anything, they’re just... mad. 

like i said yesterday... if y’all wanna be mad about taylor/tn’s capitalistic bullshit... you KNOW i’m here... but y’all gotta be mad about the capitalistic bullshit. you can’t be mad adjacent do it just because you like being mad 

so like call out the bullshit. say “the whole concept of buying presales is unethical and rude” explain why unfairness and favoritism for rich in presale hurts the poor more than anyone else like disproportionately so because of what happens in resale. DON’T complain about vip tickets that no one could get unless you were rolling in the dough anyway. 

but i’ll be honest with you... this DOESN’T feel messier than the 1989 tour to me AT ALL. the prices for that tour DOUBLED from the red tour and presale was surprised/sprung on us ONE WEEK after first week of the album was over. fans who saved up specifically to buy multiple copies of the album and depleted their savings to do so were completely unable to participate in presale because they had just spent the money they’d spent on a ticket on multiple copies of the album for polaroids and taylurking shots... there were so many fewer shows and so little time to prepare for any of it

we have known for MONTHS there were only going to be 26 us shows (27 wioth the second gillette date). we don’t know us pricing but at this point, i feel confident it’ll be similar to 1989 and aside from buying presale codes and that whole shit, it’s... not messier?

but i do also want to mention pricing and not announcing it before sale... like y’all act like that’s new??? but like ticket prices are never announced before the presale starts. this year, i’ve been a part of six presales including this one. all of them done through verified fan. not a single one has told us pricing prior to the sale starting... we didn’t get pricing info before the 1989 presale started we didn’t get pricing info before the red tour started... i don’t think we got pricing info before speak now either... idk about fearless because i wasn’t paying attentio, but i doubt that... tbh announcing pricing before presale starts is not something that’s done. and i think that’s an issue with ticketmaster more than taylor but it doesn’t make ANY sense to act like that’s new or proof that this era is “messy” or “against fans.” 

TL;DR: Please be rational with your complaints because tbh a lot of you appear to be just angry for no reason and that helps no one. 

[kendrixtermina]

It's not your "4 fix" that makes people think you're a infp. It's your obvious inferior Te. People like midlink have told you a thousand times: high Ti users break down their thought process instead of sending a long walk of text with difficult and over researched words. A intp wouldn't need a "long list with points and examples with less vague definitions" because that's Te, a Ti Dom is not as sure about their type as you're so stubborn with yours. You don't explain yourself like a intp.

Ah you’re one of their cronies. as I suspected. 

One group of raid-loving associates is hardly “people”. Calm your Fe tits and get perspective. . 

I shall not be wasting further time on this nor repeating the same arguments I made weeks ago, other than the tl; dr is that you’re shoehorning my words into your conceptions of the definitions with a generous helping of word-twisting and presumption. 

An amusing example for casual readers:

Me: “Be precise and specific. Give me reason to give your random claim attention and consideration.” ( that is, Don’t use a vague  that could be applied to anything)

They: You asked for said you needed “less vague” definitions [as in easier to understand] hence inf Te. 

It’s like those ppl who argue their fav character is an INFJ  and blame all the obvious, copious and constant displays of sensing on “inferior Se”. never mind that an inferior function would generally be used mostly when triggered rather than being the person’s default aproach.

I mean take a step back and look at this.  Do they realize that they’ve just basically claiming that using, referencing or researching technical jargon is something an INTP would never do? I don’t think they meant to do that  because it’s opposite of like what any source ever tell you about INTPs when you first ask what they are. Stereotypes don’t apply to everyone but the love of nerd jargon and researching new topics seems to be widespread. 

Rather this is insofar as I can tell a honest mistake due to using bad definitions. 

Good example for these “One trick pony, simplistic” conception of the functions a la “Si is memory” or “Ni is planning” that creates so much confusion, in their case “all referencing is Te”. In truth one behavior can be done by various processes in various ways. 

Since neither of us invented mbti and we wish to talk about mbti and not some thing we’ve made up from scratch on our own, we would have to read up on sources in order to talk about this mbti thing and use jargon in order to discuss the topic with precision and familiarize ourselves with the concept.

Since no human can invent the wealth of modern science themselves we ALL have to reference at some point. That’s no more a particular function than memory rather function influences how we reference. I daresay a lot of referenciing is also Ne but that would be a more associative sort. 

With the T functions its more about connections - the difference is more that Te takes the data as it is as basic “building blocks” which it then build into methods, procedures and applications, whereas Ti tries to understand what the source “means” that is recreate a model of the concept and its logical interconnections in their head. They won’’t just go and use the fact right away until they have analyzed it for themselves, but they may well think “this is an useful concept!” and adopt it, making additions or changes for themselves or synthezising their own understanding from multiple sources depending on what convinces them whereas the Te user adopts an alghorithm/procedure based on how well it gets results. 

Accepting info after checking it isn’t the same as just “swallowing” it. There’s a difference between citing a source as an appeal to authority or doing it so the other person knows which imput you used, which parts of the thinking are yours and to go and form their own conclusions. Obviously I would not reference concepts that did not convince me but the decision wether to be convinced or not is made via how the concept mashes with previous understanding and wether it makes logical sense not because I have seen its results and widely found useful by ppl in general (Te) - indeed a lot of this advanced in depht socianics stuff isn’t known or used by many people but I use it because I have found it makes sense and makes good distinctions.barring future changes of opinion of course.

Indeed knowledge only through results but not and unless there’s very good proof I tend to disbelieve or be sceptical of claims of casual relation if there is no mechanistical explanation of HOW thing A can possibly affect thing B. For better or for worse. Sometimes it turns out the local INTJ was right and a problem really ~was~ the laundry detergent’s fault even if I did not know how. . 

But in either case the person will talk of square roots when they encounter a square root or a problem that square roots  are relevant and refer to the word “square root”. Not everyone who ever did this is a FP or TJ. The difference is more in the focus understanding: TE: “You get a square root by multiplying a number with itself.” Ti: “A square root is a number’s multiple of itself.” - hence why socionics calls it procedural logic or alghorithms (”This is how you do it.” where the answer is a method) vs. structural logic or laws. (”What is it?” where the answer is a cathegory in the TPs’ sorting system)

Te is not just repeating phrases. TJs and FPs do not just repeat stuff - they know, to varying degrees, when and how to use what depending on what they encounter and criticize/ find fault in such methods. (Indeed in my experience the types who do the most “unsynthesized repeating of statements” are usually Ti inferiors who often compensate with a very Fe ish, “A said X statement but B said Y so I am asking a third person consensus decision process and they seem to have a hard time extracting extra information from a statement by deduction.)

What Jung meant by “objective” or “Subjective” in his original definition of the functions - which I’ve studied -  is not the colloquial sense of the words (that extroverted functions only copy and that introverted ones make every) but wether “the attention begins with the subject” or “the object.”

That means ddoes the thought start with the person, or with what they are seeing? 

Te, Ne, Fe, and Se will pay attention to the stimulus because it’s there wether it’s reacting to a feeling, awknowledging a fact, reacting to a sensation, noticing an association etc. with Fi, Ti, Si and Ni the process begins from the inside - how does the stimulus relate to the subject and their own feelings/beliefs/archetypes/past sensations? Hence why Te pays attention to things that are ‘relevant’ whereas Ti follows what the person is interested in & may not show much interest in what is deemed “relevant” by broad society hence the math geek who knows nothing about movie stars etc. 

And once you understand that it is way more probable that I have Ti insofar as I can discern I match those patterns very well. 

IDK who OP is surely can’t type them from just this paragraph but I recall that a lot of ppl of the group from the 2 weeks back poster were ENTPs so for a moment I’ll work off the asumption that you are one it would make a lot of sense if you were even if its not the only option. 

This is where the fine distinctions of socionics concepts are useful particularly in how they describe the difference between different function slots such as auxillary and as well as Victor Gulenko’s “Cognitive styles” (I am almost certainly holographic-panoramic so assuming that I was indeed mistaken and was a Fi user all along, I’d be an ENFP if anything.

It may come down to a difference between ENTP and INTP.

But to make iot short and cut to the basics the idea  - which at least to me seemed consistent with all my observations - is that the auxxilary or “creative” function is used to “create” new thoughts at the behest of the base/program/dominant function when the dom function switches it on. in any case the dominant function is what makes the primary decisions that is basic in any variant of jungian typology. 

Hence why an ENTP can defend a wolly foreign belief system on the fly in a debate, change opinion over night and reinterpret all past data to that end etc. but that is specific of auxillary Ti not all Ti. In an ENTP your auxillary spits out ever new all new such logically consistent frameworks at the whim of your dominant Ne. 

So Ne doms change their opinions very fast and are often constantly wondering if they’re mistyped - even when they know that this is common for Ne doms they still could be wrong and as Ne doms they primarily see the world as “coulds”. Since they have little Si they are not likely to give past experiences much weight and take longer to “retain” tendencies anyways so their opinions are not particularly inert especially if their gut fix is not nine. 

I mean think of it: Ti is an introverted function. It uses an internal framework to make decisions which it constantly mantains. New problems are either quickly decided based on past categories or require a slow introverted process of reorganization.  In an INTP, Ti is in charge and flips Ne on when needed.  Dom Ti fits everything into one big central framework which is the main organising principle of the person’s mind. 

When new data or queries are encountered the ENTP would first go to Ne and look at the possibility, examine it in its own right, and then later create or look for a logical framework that fits it. The INTP would go to Ti first, that is, try to fit it into that big preexisting net work. And only if it does not fit will it be reorganized, “Oh, I was wrong, so what else could it be? * activates Ne” 

 First time someone presents you with a possibility you will examine it but you won’t reexamine something from the ground up if you already “know” the terrain and have a strong detailed framework that explains why the person may think that even though you don’t think it’s true. You’re still open to changing your mind but a threshold of unaccounted data must be crossed before reevaluation will happen. That is how dominant  introverts work. It’s not stubborness its not reinventing the wheel twice. 

Its not uncommon for INTPs in particular to “miss” data that does not fit their framework at times and need some time to change entrenched beliefs. And again that’s not just me saying it that’s very common info with a simple cause: the way in which dominant Ti tries to fit everything in a preexisting framework first and then maybe changes. Really not making any wild controversial claims here. Also we have more Si than ENTPs making the ideas more inert for better or for worse. 

To summarize: 

Dominant Ti doesn’t change at the drop of a hat like aux Ti especially in conjunction with tert si

Citing sources is basic rhetoric not Te the difference is in HOW the sources are used

The difference is in focus on the object vs begin of thinking inside the subject

in the end there’s only so much sense in discussing my thinking with a stranger who isn’t a telepath. I know my head but how would i prove that to you? 

(See the common apologist spiel about”All nonbelievers secretly believe.” Me: *feels no belief* actually no. - but how to I prove to someone what is or isn’t in my head, especially if their worldview doesn’t even allow for the possibility? Same with being in denial. How do you prove youre not in denial? especially when both no denial and denial can produce the answer “No im not?”.  )

Person A: You talk only about yourself!

Person B: No I do not`?

Person A: You’re doing it again! ... but you can’t answer a quetion anout yourself without mentioning yourself. Its the other person who mentioned you in the first place. So IDK if anything will even come of this except another hour of my life going out the window. 

[irregularjohnnywiggins]

My Pitch for how to rewrite Arrow.

So, a while back, after me and my brother had a chin-wagging session on why Arrow was a legitimately terrible show after Season 2, I decided to do a little think piece: say I was tasked with rebooting Arrow a couple of years down the line. How would I do it? What would I change (a lot)? What would I keep the same (not a lot)? I decided to sit down and write out a basic outline for a rewritten Arrow Season 1.

...two weeks, 2000+ words and another basic outline for Season 2 later, I am pleased to present my pitch for Arrow Season 1 under the cut to anyone who might give a shit.

WARNINGS for: discussion of violence, mental health and swearing.

The first season is almost exactly the same as Arrow, but with a few not that big rather large differences

1.       First off, no Felicity. You could probably bend her characterization into something likeable, but it would just be too much work for too little payoff.

Seriously, if we need someone to do hacker bits? Oracle is right there, you guys.

2.       More overtly a Robin Hood story-Team Arrow are the Merry Men, Malcolm Merlyn is the Sherriff of Nottingham, some episodes are entirely ripped from lesser-known Robin Hood stories, etc. (Full disclosure: this is mainly because I love Robin Hood, and will fight to the death to have another good Robin Hood show for this generation)

3.       Have Oliver be explicitly an SJW. I say this because Arrow really lost something the instant it turned Oliver into just another Batman clone. If I may reference a comic I haven’t read (yet) I think one of the most interesting (and easily incorporated) elements of the Rebirth story is Oliver coming to terms with the idea that he can’t really ‘fuck the man’ if he is ‘the man’, and it could also give Thea something to do besides be all ‘self-destructive teen’-and also it’s a great way to introduce Roy.

4.       In addition, have Merlyn be an actual morally opposed antagonist. Maybe have Tommy bring up that Merlyn could do anything to help the people of the Glades and be more faithful to his mother’s memory, but it’s easier for him to pretend that he’s ‘curing’ the city by getting rid of the poor people.

5.       And for God’s sake, don’t have Oliver open up a nightclub in the middle of a dilapidated area that needs literally anything except another fucking nightclub. Like… anything. Hell, have him open up a soup kitchen that also gives out really expensive clothes he doesn’t need any more, and have Moira be all ‘but charity? What is the SJW bullshit?’

Thus Thea’s whole ‘I work at a law firm except now I run a nightclub aren’t I a caring soul?’ becomes ‘I worked at a law firm and now I run a soup kitchen because this will actually help people.’

6.       But the biggest change has to be to Black Canary.

So, when Oliver returns from the island Laurel is… different. For one thing, she’s going by Dinah now. She’s also got a new personal trainer (Wildcat), and… that scene in episode 2 when China White attacks them? Dinah kicks ass.

But that’s not the only thing that surprises him.

See, when he goes to strike the first name off the list-a name, I may remind you, that Dinah is suing in court to no real effect-he runs into complications.

Complications in the form of an apparent thief named Black Canary.

See, Dinah’s been doing this Daredevil shtick for a while now. Apparently she compulsively activated her meta-gene in grief after her sister’s death, and the Canary Cry is actually effective in this-the Canary Cry in the comics can take out Wondy if she’s not prepared, so we’re talking that level of effectiveness.

Why she decided to be a vigilante is up for debate-maybe she actually has a Daredevil-esque ‘I trusted in the law, and it screwed everything up, so fuck it, I’mma do it myself!’ or maybe she found out her mother was the first Black Canary and took up the mantle (or both. Both is good)

Regardless, she’s here to hack into Hunt’s computers and release a ton of info onto the web to use in her case against him. Oliver’s here to hack in and give the money Hunt stole back to the people.

Neither of them mention this.

They fight.

Dinah wins (of course)

And thus, for more or less the first half of the first season, both of these dorks are convinced that they’re having a ‘Batman/Catwoman’ style romance, with the other one as Catwoman.

They arrive in more or less the same area, they trade witty banter, they both somehow get what they want despite the other person opposing them, rinse and repeat.

Even better, Oliver goes to Dinah in her civilian identity in like Episode 3. So Dinah starts thinking ‘maybe he’s not so bad after all’. So she starts pulling her punches. Which results in Oliver sometimes winning (rarely, but sometimes). Which results in him thinking that it has more to do with his skills than it probably does.

Meanwhile, out of costume, Oliver and Dinah exchange as much flirty banter as in costume. Like, sometimes it’s the exact same flirty banter.

Diggle, after he joins Oliver, immediately susses out who Black Canary is based purely on the flirty banter, and spends the rest of the first half of the season constantly going HOW HAVE THESE TWO NOT FIGURED IT OUT YET?

7.       The mid-season finale has GA and BC fighting Merlyn, wherein a) they both discover who the other is and b) Oliver gets sure-fire proof that Moira is involved in the Undertaking

8.       This leads to Dinah and Diggle both telling Oliver to give the evidence to Lance (who has been hunting for both of them, but keeps on hinting that he knows who Black Canary, at least, is) but Oliver is all ‘but she’s my mom.’

9.       And because Diggle and Dinah are having none of that shit, Dinah goes to her dad and he starts investigating Moira.

Oliver is not happy.

They fight.

Dinah wins (of course)

10.   Oliver spends about three episodes brooding about this, until Diggle, Thea (unknowingly) and Dinah kick his ass back into gear (This is also where we get the majority of the island flashbacks, which, btw: almost the same, but no Slade and more Yao Fei and Shado.)

11.   Tommy finds out who GA and BC are (how I’m undecided on. Maybe Dinah tells him, maybe Oliver does, maybe he figures it out on his own, idk) and agrees to help investigate his dad, because Team Arrow figure that Malcolm has to be involved.

Btw, Tommy’s been working in the soup kitchen because Oliver’s paying him and he, at least at the start, thinks he can convince Ollie to give up this weird SJW thing he’s got going on and go back to being a partyer

This all changes when he meets one Roy Harper, because Roy is basically him but with no money and an even bigger chip on his shoulder (also Native American cos I’ll be fucked if anyone gets whitewashed in my fucking Green Arrow show)

Basically for every scene the show devoted to that fucking love triangle I want a scene of Tommy and Roy being bros.

12.   Moira isn’t convinced to out the Undertaking by Oliver tricking her, but by Oliver confronting her at the same time as Tommy confronts Malcolm, and the two giving more or less the same speech eviscerating the notion that the Undertaking is good for anyone.

Seriously, I want full on Marxist, socio-economic and class-based ideas being raised. I want this to be so overtly political that newsgroups will be talking about it for years. You wanna prove comic books aren’t just for kids anymore? Have an adult conversation about the world comic book Green Arrow would want us to live in, and see the conservative nerd sites explode.

For a bonus, have Malcolm talk like a commentator on Fox News, all ‘entitled poor people’ and ‘benefit thieves’ and ‘they shouldn’t be born poor if they didn’t want to get killed by an earthquake machine’.

13.   Ultimately, the speech convinces Moira that she needs to turn over everything on the Undertaking to the authorities, and convinces Malcolm that Tommy just doesn’t understand his plan, and that he needs to start it right away.

14.   From then on, the finale goes more or less as it goes in canon, with one major exception: Oliver and Dinah are both there when Tommy dies.

15.   But before we get on to that, a word about the Green Arrow and killing:

Now, straight up front, I prefer my heroes to not kill if they can help it.

I do have caveats to that belief (e.g. I am in general agreement with @bluefall-returns‘ stance that Superman and Batman’s ‘killing is okay as long as it’s not humans’ ethos is… problematic, to say the least, and Wondy’s whole ‘don’t attack until you first talk, but if someone is a proven threat and killing is your only option, make sure they aren’t getting up afterwards’ is such a refreshing concept that I even incorporated it into the morality of one of my main characters) but on the whole, a superhero like Green Arrow, who stands for a specific set of real-world beliefs, shouldn’t kill unless absolutely necessary, and certainly not admit that he enjoys doing it (seriously, wtf Guggenheim?)

That being said, I will acknowledge that Oliver should kill at the start of the series. That only makes sense. He’s got fucking PTSD for fuck’s sake. Of course he’s reacting the way he did on the island.

But – and here’s the key thing – YOU ACKNOWLEDGE THE PTSD!

YOU DON’T HAVE YOUR ‘LOVE INTEREST’ MAKING JOKES AT YOUR EXPENSE ABOUT FUCKING ‘FANTASY ISLAND’!

YOU DON’T HAVE HER ACTING ALL CLUELESS AS TO WHY YOU’RE OPPOSED TO KILLING NOW!

YOU DON’T HAVE PEOPLE BEAT YOUR MAIN CHARACTER DOWN FOR MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES AND CALL HIM AN ASSHOLE IF HE RESPONDS NEGATIVELY TO TRIGGERS!

I APPARENTLY HAVE TO TELL PROFESSIONAL WRITERS THAT PTSD ISN’T SOMETHING THAT CAN JUST SOME AND GO AS IT PLEASES

I’S SO FUCKING STUPFOWRBUORVN PNFWEONVOEWVN OWRENVORENVREO

…

…sorry

Anyway, have Oliver go to Dinah for help, because hey, she took an elective in psychiatry in college, maybe? (I don’t know how American school works)

(That may seem a bit too Mary Sue for some of you, but I say that if Batman can be a detective/ninja/billionaire/whatever else, and TV!Ollie can be a member of the Russian Mob before he even comes back to the city and no-one questions it, the fucking Black Canary can be a therapist if I want her to be. Also, at the very least it’s from a piece of comic book media (Young Justice) and associated with the right character, which already puts it ahead of anything Error has done with its female characters.)

So Ollie stops killing people after a while (which, for bonus points, removes a lot of the ‘WHAT WERE YOU THINKING’ from the Huntress episode)

(Yes, episode, because the second episode was pointless and I hate it.)

16.   So, anyway, that happens. Thus, when Ollie fights Merlyn, it’s less external ‘will Tommy forgive me if I kill his dad’ and more Batman style ‘if I kill him, will I be able to stop/will I go back to what I was before?’

I still haven’t figured this out, btw. If Oliver kills him, then events proceed as they do in the show and Oliver is left with the realisation that killing Merlyn didn’t do anything except add another casualty to this insane plot. If Oliver lets Merlyn live, everything Merlyn does in later seasons are things Oliver could have stopped in this moment.

17.   Where’s Dinah during this fight? Simple: she’s helping the evacuation of the Glades, because she may be able to help with the fight, but both her and Oliver know that’s secondary to getting the people to safety, and Merlyn’s all kinds of right wing shite, so it’s reasonable to assume he’s also sexist (he probably isn’t, but they assume he is) and so more willing to fight just Green Arrow than just Black Canary.

18.   But, yeah, back to the angst.

19.   So, Tommy dies. More importantly, Tommy does not die propping up Green Canary, because killing off people and having their final moments be about propping up another ship is a terrible idea. So, no, Tommy dies exactly as he does in canon, but with Oliver and Dinah there, and they both get closure.

20.   The result is Oliver doesn’t just go fuck off to Lian Yu, but instead walks up to Dinah after Tommy’s funeral and is all ‘This city is going to go down the shitter. Thousands of people are now homeless, the rich bastards (Dinah ‘you know it’s not healthy to speak about yourself in the third person’) are gonna be trying to get as much of the opportunity pie as they can, and on top of all of that, we need to find out just how many of them were involved in this. It’s gonna be a hell of a job. You up for it?’

21.   Dinah smiles. It’s simultaneously beautiful and dangerous.

22.   ‘I thought you’d never ask’ she says.

So, that’s my idea. I’ll freely admit this isn’t complete, nor is it perfect - I didn’t really have many ideas for Detective Lance other than ‘Commissioner Gordon meets Sam Vimes’, which doesn’t really come across here, and my lack of knowledge about Roy Harper beyond Arrow and Young Justice (both of which I’ve been reliably told by @oathkeptroxas are not good representations of his character) lead me to be unsure of what to do with him, but I just wanted to get this idea off my chest. Thanks for listening to my rambles, and if you have any questions, ask what you will.

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: did you find her? Rio: Yeah, and with minimal damage, thank fuck Rio: she's sleeping it off now Buster: Good Buster: You should try and get some yourself too, like Rio: Alright, Dad 😜 Rio: I'm good, wasn't as wrecked as you Buster: Fuck off Buster: And you wonder why I ain't polite like you supposedly are Rio: Jokes, grumpy Rio: need an extra 5 yourself, I reckon Buster: Hilarious Buster: I've got coffee I'm fine Rio: I mean, glad to hear you're not starting your day with some lines, babe Buster: Setting such high standards for me, Cavante Buster: Cheers Rio: Idk, that student life init Rio: can't tell me half your class don't reckon they're leo in wolf of wallstreet...boys, please Buster: 😂 Buster: You're right I can't tell you that Rio: See, right AND funny, me Rio: finally getting it Buster: Behave Buster: Just 'cause you saved my night doesn't mean I like you that much Rio: Not all heroes wear capes, McKenna Rio: but I ain't expecting a fruit basket or a thank you note from the desk of Rio: politeness don't gotta extend that far, so you're alright Buster: Ain't that the truth. Might be hungover but I have vivid memories of what you wore last night and a cape doesn't come close Buster: What do you want then, babe? Rio: Good Rio: 'cos a dress like that is not going to waste and it's been insta'd now so gotta wait at least a calendar month if I need to bring it out for someone more appreciative Rio: Ain't that just the question Buster: You reckon there's someone who can compete with me? 😂 You do have jokes Buster: Yeah. So tell me Rio: In appreciation of me? Hmm Rio: Probably not, nah, you are pretty obsessed 😉 Rio: I don't need paying Buster: At anything, babe Buster: Get real Rio: Not the Olympics, babe Rio: I am real Buster: And stupid Buster: shut up Rio: How am I stupid? Rio: And don't tell me to shut up Buster: Don't try and wind me up and I won't Rio: I wasn't even but no surprise it's so easy to push all your buttons Buster: Whatever Buster: Calling out your own lack of skill there, babe Buster: No need to do yourself down this early Rio: Funny Rio: you're the one out here wanting to pay so obviously not Buster: I got cash burning holes, it ain't personal Rio: What a problem to have Rio: I'll make sure not to be offended then Buster: Be how you want Rio: I ain't got time to be mad tbh Rio: Nothing personal, of course, but bigger fish to fry Buster: I'll leave you to it then, yeah? Rio: If you like Rio: fuck knows when Drew'll show up though Buster: Let me know when he does Rio: Sure Rio: gonna need to get in line, like Buster: I'm used to blagging my way to the front, don't worry about it Rio: 😂 Rio: Fuck knows I ain't got a much better plan myself Buster: 'Course Buster: 'Cause it's the best plan, like Buster: 😂 Rio: 🙄😏 Rio: you can help Indie bury the body then, great minds again, like Buster: Yeah Buster: might give her the wrong idea though, you're the hero, it ain't me Rio: Who held her hair back and made her tea and toast Rio: think we're alright, babe Rio: know you truly think you're irresistible Buster: Don't think, I know Buster: And so do you Rio: Whatever you say, boy Buster: What so you need to be told again already, or just shown? Rio: You offering? Buster: You saying you ain't too busy now all of a sudden? Rio: I told you he ain't back yet Buster: Nah you said you dunno when he will be Rio: Pedantic Buster: Could be dramatic if he comes back when I'm making myself at home Buster: That's all Rio: That's a fun euphemism Rio: Gonna write that one down Rio: What would he say? Hey, I'm the only one allowed to do fucked up shit with her! Buster: Don't Buster: It's not funny Rio: Trust me, I know Buster: Fucking hell Buster: Do you really reckon he'll show his face again any time soon? Rio: Probably Rio: Idk, 'less he's trying to do worse this time and straight up ghost all 3 of his kids Rio: Where's he gonna go? Buster: What a cunt Buster: You gonna re-arrange XS for Indie? Rio: Yeah deffo Rio: doubt it'll be tonight but not that hard to sort, know 'em all Buster: Good Buster: Not like she's got anywhere else to go but getting out of her head is the next best thing Rio: Not the message I'm tryna send her, like but 😂 Rio: thank fuck Jay's concept of the bottle is still 🍼 eh Rio: how is she Buster: Christ, don't Buster: but yeah she's alright Rio: Bless Buster: [Sends pics of Jay] Rio: 😍 Buster: Not saying my kid's cuter than yours but like Buster: I can imagine how hungover Indie is Rio: I won't do her like that and take a pic Rio: the friendship back off Buster: I'll check her snap later I'm sure she'll provide her own proof anyway Rio: Awh Rio: She'll be well buzzin' Buster: Belated birthday gift Rio: Won't brag that mine was better or nothing Buster: I wasn't trying to take the gold there Buster: She loves me enough as is Rio: and I meant your gift for me Rio: competitiveness getting the better of you always Buster: Well yeah 'cause that goes without saying Rio: You're cute Buster: Fuck off Rio: aww baby Buster: Rio Buster: Behave Rio: Make me Buster: If I come over there you know I won't want you to Rio: I know Rio: no followthrough 😉 Buster: If that's how you want it I'll make you behave like an 😇 Rio: You know exactly how I want it Buster: But I want you to ask nicely Rio: If I do you promise you'll come see me Rio: too much teasing Buster: I won't be able to resist, will I Buster: If you do Rio: Good because you've got me this way Rio: so I need you to be the one to make me cum Rio: Pretty please Buster: I need to have you all to myself though Buster: Let me take you somewhere Rio: Where though Buster: I don't care as long as Indie ain't there Rio: Alright, not going to argue with you because I'm desperate for you Rio: just make it happen Buster: I'll drive until you tell me to stop, babe Buster: No teasing Rio: I don't know if I'm capable of telling you to stop Rio: goes against everything i want Buster: Fuck Buster: You're making it hard to care if Indie's around Rio: She's slept through worse Rio: you'll have to get creative if you wanna keep me quiet though Buster: You know I don't want you quiet Rio: Then keep talking Rio: Hear me from there Buster: Rio Rio: Yes baby/ Buster: I can't get enough of you Rio: I know Rio: I feel it too Buster: such a headfuck Buster: I can't stop thinking about you Rio: Yeah Rio: but whatever, right? Buster: it's your fault Buster: you're so hot Rio: You can blame me as long as you don't stop fucking me Buster: I can't until you're screaming for me and won't when you beg me Buster: I want you that badly Rio: Buster Rio: Come over now Buster: On my way Rio: Jesus Rio: what the fuck did i do with myself before you Buster: didn't know what you were missing, like Buster: but you don't have to wait for me now if you can't Rio: You want me to touch myself? Buster: Considerate, I know Rio: I'll record it Rio: only fair, it's all for you Buster: yeah? Buster: you're so fucking good Rio: gotta keep up with you yeah Buster: I could say the same to you, babe Rio: Don't do bad between us Buster: Yeah we do, bad in the best way though Rio: Agreed Buster: Steady on, sounded almost like you can stand me then Rio: Let's not get carried away Buster: I'll turn around and leave then shall I, 'cause I was gonna tell you to open the door and let me get very carried away like Rio: Don't Rio: Coming Buster: You will be Rio: Nerd

[kai-keda]

do you think chichi fits the tiger mom stereotype? how do you view the stereotype in general, taking onto account the harm it is said to be done to children's development and the crash of culture?

So I’ve always been iffy on what “Tiger Mom” means so I googled it and LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SOURCE HOLY COW 

(that’s a .edu source. Very trustworthy~)

Anyways, I like how the first section there talks about how the stereotype itself is far from the truth as far as actual Chinese parents feel and also how it’s a stereotype from American culture that comes from trying to explain Chinese ideas with American logic.

I just read the first section to get an idea of what the actual stereotype is and from what I read... Chichi sounds a lot like Amy Chua.

Outsiders trying to put American ideas and culture onto a Chinese woman and deciding that she’s doing things that she’s actually not.

Like the Author, Scarlett Wang, said about Amy’s children being both very happy and successful, Gohan seems very happy and successful by the time he goes into High School. He seems to be on a damn good path for himself. So why the harsh judgments on Chichi’s parenting?

I don’t think Chichi fits the stereotype, but I think she actually is an example of what a typical Chinese mother is like, at least, from what this article tell me.

And now I go to read the rest of that article because making a claim like that while not reading it seems dumb, actually.

I just read the second section and it seems like this really is starting to describe Chichi.

Some would say she’s authoritative (myself) and others would say she’s authoritarian but in all honesty, it’s most liking something different that is similar to both styles while not being either. I.e; Chinese mother.

On to the third section!

“Thus, parenting practices that appear harsh and strict to others are often simply a culturally-based attempt to train children to act in a socially acceptable manner.” Sounds about how I feel about Chichi’s parenting. She seems to yell too much in our eyes but with a closer look you notice that she only yells when necessary and that she’s trying to burn it into her child’s brain that that behavior is not okay. Same goes for possibly explaining why she yells at Goku in front of the kids. It could be that she developed the habit of yelling at him in front of Gohan to make sure Gohan would know that “you see what your father is doing? He’s a special case. Don’t do that. See? I’m not rewarding his behavior, I’m punishing it.”

In American society, we see yelling as a BIG no-no for some reason. (Idk. My mom yelled a lot and my family is the most whole and successful one of all my friends so I don’t think it matters that much lol. Just saying that there’s no definite proof that it’s bad parenting to yell but I digress). But I can see how that’s a simple cultural difference. Stereotypes exist for a reason, after all. It’s possible that Chinese parents DO yell at their kids a lot but only because their culture has taught them that’s exactly what you’re SUPPOSED to do. Better than actually getting emotionally/physically abusive. Yelling alone does not make it emotionally abusive, but the how, when, why and what they’re yelling can be. Chichi doesn’t yell that Gohan is stupid/terrible/the worst. She just yells that he’s acting up as punishment for said acting up.

I love how this section goes into how a lot of people misunderstand Chinese parenting (and I think parenting in general) because they only see the actions and not the beliefs behind the actions.

That happens a LOT in this fanbase. Ignoring the intentions, the context and all the background behind what happens and focusing solely on what actually happened. This is some kind of logical fallacy, I can feel it.

To the fourth section!

This one is really interesting to me becomes it makes the idea of children having the understanding that their parents way of raising them is a good thing as important clear. It’s important for the child to have that cultural understanding.

In the case of Dragon Ball where we’re not talking about a 1x1 comparison, I think it’s safe to call Gohan a first-generation child to a Chinese immigrant mother. From what we have seen (which is honestly not much because it’s an action series) Chichi seems to have a distinct style of parenting and we all know Goku’s got shit for culture to influence him.

I think Gohan having spent four years not knowing anything else but Chichi’s parenting style and Goku no doubt giving in to whatever Chichi says because he’s not an idiot and he knows that she’s more educated on what good parenting is could lead to the conclusion that Gohan has that cultural understanding that what Chichi does what she does because she loves him.

The reason I bring Goku most likely giving in to Chichi up is because, with Goku and Chichi being the only examples Gohan had to go on before getting kidnapped by a seven year old alien monster, it’s important to understand how Goku probably reacts to Chichi’s requests. Probably confusion and more than likely positive responses.

Keep in mind that all scenes of Gohan sneaking out behind Chichi’s back because he doesn’t want to study are filler and movies. Not canon. I don’t believe there’s anything in canon of Gohan going against his mother and acting like he doesn’t want anything to do with her style of parenting.

The most we get of that sentiment is when he demands to go to Namek which is a very isolated incident but even then, he’s not sneaking out out of fear of her reaction. He knows she’ll be mad but he still confronts it because he doesn’t really want to go against his mother, he just really wants to go to Namek.

The final section!

“highlight the danger in applying mainstream American concepts of parenting to measure and understand Chinese parenting.” Just gonna leave that there.

Okay so time for my own conclusion.

Yeah, sure, Chichi is a “tiger-mom” and we all know how she’s based on Chinese culture. Everything she does is based on Chinese culture so it’s not hard to believe that her rationale comes from Chinese ideas.

After reading this, I think most - if not all - ideas of the “tiger-mom” stereotype being inherently bad for children is based on trying to push American culture onto Chinese mothers.

For Chichi’s philosophy to work, Gohan needs to be able to understand the culture behind it and I believe it’s safe to assume he does given how that’s the only parenting style he’s seen (again - running on the assumption that Goku would go along with whatever Chichi says) so there’s no reason to believe he suffers from it the way second-generation Chinese immigrant children do.

I think Chichi’s parenting style is a legitimate way to approach parenting and that it works perfect for Gohan, even with all the outside interference's.

I also believe Goku’s a very passive parent. He let’s Chichi lead the way on what to do and just spends all his energy on spoiling and loving his son because, as far as how to be a good parent, it’s all he knows. This ends up giving us our very traditional feel from this family. Dad’s off at work all the time, mom’s at home raising the kids and when they get to all be together, those moments are full of quality love.