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#anyway. i dont want to be at work for a lot of reasons
semercury · 8 months
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I don't want to be at work I want to be home writing some silly little words.
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ink-the-artist · 1 month
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forgive me if you've been asked this before or if its annoying, but how did you learn to use colored pencils like that? your art is so special to me.
ty :) I took an art class for a few years where our teacher had us buy prismacolor pencils as one of the art supplies and had us use them kinda like paints, pressing down hard right away and blending the colors together. its not how youre supposed to use them she was just trying to teach us to use color and ig this was more to the point. I picked them up again years after i stopped going to that class just bc they were there and i wanted to play around w them a bit and ended up actually enjoying it when doing it on my own terms lol
#it was a weird class#it was just this russian lady doing private lessons in her house that my mom learned about somehow#I did NOT like those classes all we did was still life and they were hours long which is esp rough when im in high school and busy#and she wanted us to stand while working the whole time bc tradition i guess?#she did allow me to work sitting but thought i was lazy for it. idk dude i dont want to exhaust myself fast for no reason#standing is a lot more tiring than walking#i def did still benefit from those classes just from learning to accurately draw from life#did not like the teacher tho#on one hand shed paid for the art supplies for kids whos families were too poor to (and these are nice expensive supplies)#which is very nice#but on the other she was very homophobic and open about it#like when they legalized gay marriage she went on a rant about how horrible it is that they can adopt kids now#and also kind of racist#she was telling me how she got blocked from a facebook group bc she made a post asking if she could speak to a white person#and she didnt realize she was posting that publicly she thought it was a private message to the group owner#im honestly still not sure i heard/understood her correctly bc it was so bizzare and the only time i ever remember her being racist#she talked abt it like she genuienly was unaware it was racist#she described it as a misunderstanding bc she accidentally posted it publicly instead of privately#like it wouldnt have been racist to ask that at all#also one time she talked about how she saw demons in her home once#also she doesnt vaccinate her kids bc of microchips#she was like a walking russian stereotype lol#anyway heres some ink the artist lore
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piosplayhouse · 2 years
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Not going to get involved in the ao3 politics shit but I just want to say after reading some of the top posts on this site I can tell most of the people talking about this subject very clearly did not experience Sexytimes With Wangxian
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lazuliquetzal · 10 months
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i want to hear the sports anime manifesto
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Okay short version:
My life was a sports anime for a bit, and watching sports anime makes me nostalgic for those days.
Medium version:
The typical shonen sports anime deals with themes of camaraderie, ambition, and the intersections of camaraderie and ambition, which ALWAYS hits me right in the chest.
I'm not an ambitious person by nature, but--you know that one poem floating around on here, the one about the moth that wants nothing more than to fly into the flame, and how it would be nice to feel that kind of all consuming passion? Yeah, that's the feeling I get from sports anime.
And often, for the Team Sports anime, you'll get characters who have nothing in common except that they Love the Same Thing--a friendship/rivalry/(romance) formed on the basis of a shared interest. That's sweet as hell!
And they're super predictable and low stress for me. Very easy to watch! Total popcorn shows. Also I like listening to people infodump about their passions. Someone loved their Sport so much they wrote a whole-ass story about it, so yeah, eat that shit up.
Long version:
The Socioeconomic Inequalities of High School Sports
In high school, I was on a crappy underfunded soccer team (with a healthy dose of sexism) and due to [sports league division reasons] the schools we played against were almost exclusively private schools.
I cannot describe how existential it is to be wearing a hand-me-down formerly white-turned-disgusting-gray uniform that's at least five years old when playing against a team that gets brand new windbreakers every season.
(If you've read AAB, YES this is where my obsession with the windbreakers comes from.)
(Hilariously, the guys team got windbreakers but we didn't.)
(I am not over the fucking windbreakers.)
But anyway, when you're constantly losing to private schools you get this fucking complex about it.
This should come as no surprise but like. People with the time and resources to practice their Thing get good at their Thing.
Playing pick up soccer at the park is practice. Playing rec league soccer is organized, repeated practice.
Playing competitive club soccer is all of that, plus a coach who knows How To Coach and What The Sport Is, plus you get morale-boosting uniforms and the chance to play with and against other skilled players. So you're exposed to a lot more, and thus, you learn a lot more.
Competitive club soccer is also Expensive. Rich kids get good.
There's a reason why the "Powerhouse School" is a thing in sports anime, because it's a thing in real life. People with leisure time and money get to invest in their sports development, and everyone else gets left behind in the dust. It's basically a microcosm of capitalism.
The underdog sports story is (quite tragically) bootstraps propaganda. All you have to do is be really good and work really hard and have A LOT OF PASSION to get good at your sport! The cream rises to the top! This is a meritocracy! Let's ignore all the other factors that go into an individual's development as an athlete!
(My brother got scouted for club soccer as a kid. He actually went to tryouts and got offered a spot and a scholarship and everything, but there's SO many hidden fees after the initial registration. Uniforms, equipment, travel and accommodation, tournaments, plus like, the time sink, so we never signed him up. And equipment-wise, soccer is one of the cheapest sports you can play--just imagine the price for something like baseball or hockey.)
In sports anime, there is no reform. There is no revolution.
But sports anime isn't really about that. It's about the narratives we create when we convince ourselves that we deserve to win.
(You know what I mean. Every billionaire is convinced they're some sort of heroic underdog. The same exact kind of 'working your way up' narrative.)
Sports anime is like, the uncomplicated power fantasy of playing the game. It's a world where you are rewarded for your hard work, because it's narratively satisfying. It's a world where it's safe to want things, because you have the exact same chances as the private school kids.
I used to be an obnoxiously competitive child. Then I got all my competition beaten out of me by 3 straight years of constant losing in my clownagerie of a high school soccer team (affectionate). I am going to admit that experience made me a better person and I would not trade it for anything, but I also had to like, relearn how to want things. And maybe real life is not as equal opportunity as the world of sports anime, but I think it's good to want things.
Of course, the winner-loser dichotomy makes sense in sports because of the inherent nature of competition, but it doesn't make sense in stuff like society and economics because that's like, competing over the right to live. That's where the capitalism metaphor ends,
Does sports anime actually go into the socioeconomic inequalities of sports? No. Of course not. Giant Killing never got a season 2.
But it is something I think about when I write sports anime fic. Even if it's not the point, it influences my characterization. The ego of a prodigy character in a shitty sports program is different from the ego of a prodigy character in a rich kid sports program. I am obligated to my amateur attempts to capture the complexities of the high school sports environment in my fanfiction because I am fucking insane I had a specific high school sports experience and they do say to write what you know.
#MEG I SWEAR TO YOU I WILL READ TANGERINE AT SOME POINT#I have so many thoughts about sports anime which is tragic because sports anime is not that deep#it is never that deep#part of the reason why I got so sucked into Daiya is because of the powerhouse school setting#and the fact that Eijun was so obviously lost because he never had that kind of organized system before#people give Seidou a lot of shit for 'not helping Eijun' enough but genuinely it's because he has NO CLUE how to reach out#I poured so much brainpower into Eijun's backstory in my brain it's embarrassing as hell#*shaking fanfic authors by the shoulders* YEAH THE CUTTHROAT COMPETION SUCKS BUT YOU DONT FIX IT BY SENDING HIM TO A DIFFERENT SCHOOL#I also am the only person who understands Miyuki Kazuya (exaggeration)#everyone gives him shit for the Nabe thing and look. yes he was wrong.#but I was once in that same exact situation and responded exactly the same way#Daiya no Ace is not about friendship#it's about Ambition#and people tend to make Eijun the sweet sentimental sunshine friendship guy#but he has JUST as much cutthroat ambition as Miyuki#that's why they work. that's why they understand each other#there's a whole essay I could write about Misawa but it's basically just chapter 18 of AAB#anyway if you want to watch a sports anime that does the Healthy Ambition and the Friendship Thing in the most wholesome way possible#watch Haikyuu. it really is the perfect sports anime.#shame the fanfic is 99% ship because the sports aspect of it is SUPER sweet#asks#jumpstrike#I'm answering jumpstrike but Tav I hope you see this too#lazuli talks#sports anime
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musubiki · 1 month
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i need to draw more......mochi pining for oblivious lime........
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caruliaa · 4 months
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personally i dont think karen using ziggs correct pronouns is like proof the chasitys r like so awesome and chill abt trans ppl like . legit feel like they arent like everyones entitled to their opinions on it yk ofc but imo it kinda takes away from the commentary of the harm of fundamentalist xtian views esp when they r canonically homophobic ones and ones clearly based in like. gender roles to act like transphobia isnt part of those harmful views yk but like i do have my own takes on those lines in hatchet town being. number 1 the kindaa boring one lol is that the songs in the show are non diagetic yk so its kinda like when ur telling a story abt ur friend whos nonbinary and like their mom or whoever is transphobic or theyre not out to her nd u have to mention smth their mom said abt them in the story but its not at all relevant to the story tht theyre closeted to her or she doenst respect their identity and like regardless u dont wanna deadname nd misgender ur friend so ur gonna say it like she was using the right name and pronouns assuming ur talking to someone theyre out to right. what im saying is the meta narrative (and also team starkid bc i suspect the real not in universe reason is they didnt wanna misgender both the character and their actor whos actually non binary which is like rly valid nd fair yk like esp in the instance of the simple hatchet town cameo irrelevent to any other hypothetical commentary i think itd feel less like an actual commentary on transphobia and more like. just pointless and somewhat transphobic in an of itself yk) is ziggs friend in this analogy and its not going misgender them even if it is repeating something karen said thank you very much ! and number 2 the less boring one is that ziggs nonbinary swag is so powerful tht the transphobes of hatchetfield dont know how to misgender them so theyre forced to respect their identity bc they dont know how to disrespect it lol
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opens-up-4-nobody · 6 months
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...
#its crazy how much easier it is to do things when youre not completely miserable lol#this past week has been weird bc ive felt really really good and like normal in a way thats kinds unfathomable#im hoping its the medication but my mood was already on an upward tilt and i was told it would take like 6 weeks for the meds to work#property but like ive been sleeping way more than usual. and by that i literally just mean 8hrs a night lol which is weird for me#like that never ever ever happens multiple days in a row. so idk. when i feel better it makes the 0cd way easier to manage as well#and im just generally not as anxious. on the more worrisome side i kinda just give less of a fuck so like i have an exam im not ready for#Tuesday and im just kinda like hm fuck that lol. ill go thru lil fluctuations of having a lot of energy too#like: i could run around in circles rn. i dont have to but i could. like yesterday i was out with friends and i was like bouncing up and#down while standing and rocking from side to side while sitting. which i kinda do anyway while in crowds but it was more to expend energy#last night i also got like 5hrs of sleep. so like maaaaybe ive been on the bleeding edge of mood elevation but for the most part it just#feels good and not destructive. like if i felt like this all the time that would b fantastic. its like oh so this is y ppl dont long to b#put out of their misery lol. depression? who? i dont kno her. sounds fake. but as soon as i fucking say that ill b fucking slapped back#down to earth. ugh. annoying. no emotional object permanence. i hope its the meds. if this is the person i am under layers of misery then#that is fucking so insane. we shall see. im curious to hear what the psychiatrist thinks of my brain when i follow up with her#i gave her my full dys1exia assessment which gives a pretty good picture of how my head functions. oh fuck i bet i would do waaaayyy better#on thise test if i took it in this state of mind. but anyway she has that on top of like 3 assessment sheets i filled out#dispite everything i still want someone to categorize me into a discreet box. tell me doc. am i really bip0lar? really really?#ur sure??? like 1000% sure bc my brain wont let me accept that unless its beyond a reasonable doubt. i just doesn't seem that serious.#i mean. it is but like ya kno. its not that bad. ay. this glob of mush behind my eyes runs me in circles#but for now thats ok bc i feel like i could run up a mountain or punch someone in the face lol#unrelated
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noisytenant · 5 months
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sorry, i think this might come across mean, but it is simply how i feel.
almost always i genuinely enjoy writing alt text and im glad im in the habit of doing it. but also, the idea of having someone else describe my images instead of me is so viscerally repulsive. I wonder if we could use this to get more people to write alt text. if you dont wanna write alt text then someone else decides how your post looks to people using screen readers (or people with slow internet). shudder !
and i want to be clear. the people who add image descriptions are incredibly kind and doing a great service often for little to no recognition or appreciation. And a lot of them are good at it. But it isnt about the quality of the description--they could be the best damn writer in the world, they could knock my piddly description into smithereens--if someone else ever became the voice to describe my art, or my face in a memey selfie, or literally anything i posted for public viewing, i would explode. i was born a control freak and i will die a control freak. ONLY I DECIDE MY NARRATIVE ‼‼‼
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dashiellqvverty · 6 months
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another thing about "autistic girls being bamboozled into transitioning" is like are we not famously resistant to change???? like speaking for myself at least i have known i am transmasc for like 8 or 9 years now and while there have been other barriers to accessing HRT it has always been something i'm very unsure and hesitant about, largely because i am so terrified of permanent change!!!! like idk it comes from ableism as well as transphobia bc you have to think autistic ppl are stupid and cant think for themselves to think like this but its like. many autistic people are going to be some of the most likely to be EXTRA hesitant and wait and think and plan and stuff before medically transitioning
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aro-ortega · 3 months
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i think it would be funny if in the future daniel + julia try to convince sasja to give polyamory/them as a throuple a shot
#like a reversal of step talking them into a being a triad in retri#been a while since ive played and definitely since ive played a chargeflystep run so. not confident in my memory#i just thknk it would be neat ! funny !#sasja still hates julia but. she knows now. and he knows that she knows. and thats not the reason she didnt save him#he still hates her for that hates her for leaving him. but. he also knows now that hes done much worse so. shrug#and in some runs he does accidentally drug-addledly confess to still being in love w her#and ! hes going to therapy and he does take it serious ! he can be difficult and lash out but. he does listen to what finch has to say#(and is willing to Work on things and like. have therapy Homework post retri)#and he wants. he doesnt want to be this (terror) anymore. he went to far he can see that now daniel made him see that. he wants to be.#something. better ? less murderous. less violent ig. i think he just doesnt want to hurt daniel again but. theres lots that could hurt him#anyway ! all that to also say - daniel is (supposedly) very perceptive and even tho hes not in the room when sasja confesses to julia#i dont think it would be hard for him to figure out that sasja misses julia (he still hangs out with her. even tho hes told her to fuck off#fuck off a thousand times) and ? maybe he would see or feel that theres still something there between them and#and idk. maybe daniel and ortega talk. maybe sasja and his romantic past w julia comes up. maybe ortega is like. it is what it is hes#hes clearly in love with you anyway so... but ? maybe......#idk ! im tired ! forgot where im going w this. idk how they get there but. maybe the float the idea by sasja. see if he would be willing to#to give julia another shot#(this came about bc i was thinking about how its funny that he + milo (+ vanya) are polyamorous but while milo#milo is dating as many people as she can sasja is just dating one person rn. i just think the contrast is funny)#sasja x daniel x julia#sasja jespersen#op#fh#sasja x julia#sasja x daniel
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twipsai · 11 months
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while im sharing my ahit hot takes, i also wanna add that i think ppl give Mu a little too much slack
like yeah, she IS a child, she WAS traumatized and had her home essentially colonized for no reason. its implied her family was killed and she spend at least a solid year completely alone, homeless, and scared
but like she also used time pieces to reverse the world 4 billion years back and killed everyone she thought was "bad" based on a short description they gave of their own life (if they were lucky enough to even get to the throne room and not die from the lava inside the castle). ppl act like the entire cast were horrible people for telling her to go away when she literally destroyed the earth???? like no one in ahit is a good person guys theyre all assholes lmao
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yaboisnelf · 1 year
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sometimes some guy has to turn off his hearing aid and sit in an alley for a bit yk
monthly post <3
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things i'd have done if i were in control of 13s era, part 596: strid episode
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pl4n · 20 days
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#my art#ive been so jsvgjsnsndjbdjks#just a big ol jumble of kahsjdbskdhi#and i wanna draw more but im so uninspired aahhaah#i kinda wanna do some studies or smth but ahhhh idk i also just wanna lie in bed when i can#i so tire#but being lazy and bored is also so exhausting haha it feeds itself#so yeah itd be good to try to push myself a bit in my free time to do smth kinda fun chill engaging#its crazy bc theres so much that i could be doing but i have such a hard time being self motivated...#so outside motivation like work or friends is the only reason i do literally anything#which sucks bc i have a lot of things id like to be able to do on my own but yeah. idk why its so hard to do things for myself#that being said if anyone sees this and wants to do lil drawing challenges or trades or smth together that might be niceee#im sort of painfully shy online haha tho im not so much irl#i think the thing abt it for me is the feeling of creating these lil digital footprints#like if i send a message or make a post its just preserved like that... forever.. actually i recently looked at emails from my childhood#and its really cool to see a slice of the past like that but still. idk why it bothers me tbh. i just never got used to it#memories fade and warp over time right? so it really feels like existing in the world and talking to people is just a passing moment#it doesnt really feel that way w the internet. as small and insignificant these small imprints might be#and im really just being neurotic but yeah. maybe i dont like the feeling of taking up space and slowly widening it with every little step#yea thats neurotic fr LOLL#anyways im really rambling away in these tags haha but if ima post this art anyway its such a good excuse to ramble into a void :D#and a good way to practice existing on the internet. im sure ill get used to it
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crowyobroyo · 3 months
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I like horror and gore and gross scary weird stuff but at the same time I can't even handle it anyway </3 would I let my partner drink my blood vampire style? absolutely. did I pass out when I pricked my finger and squeezed out a few drops? yes.
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todayisafridaynight · 9 months
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tumblr stop trying to copy twitter and for the love of god please improve your tagging system i just want to find A Post using keywords i know should work
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