#at special times in special scenarios....rather than like in some contexts you are no more ''right'' than the other party

[unproduciblesmackdown]

ppl will be explaining how a difference is a difference & not a Deviation from a Superior state, & people who are the ones considered Default Normal (superior) will be like "okay....to be polite....i Might say i consider Some aspects of Some people's existence mere 'difference' & not being less than me...." as like hey i'm a Benevolent god. i still actually get to consider you worse & don't have to "humor" anything that challenges my superiority. if you only want everything to fit into the norm then it will all come back to upholding the norm. thinking of people's analysis of their own realities as equally legimate as being like Obscure, Irrelevant, Superficial & then using that reasoning to justify dismissing them. same as worrying that the [Different Lessers (Others(tm))] as Everywhere = a manifestation of the awareness that, yeah, respecting them as equals Does threaten your norm which is smothering everything everywhere. ppl who need to lock in the idea of Borders around personhood like um Yes they're all delineated separate Identities outside any hierarchy & so i think it's relevant to for some reason push back against "ohh so now Everyone's queer" like why not. why couldn't they be. what if they were. what if queerness was everywhere b/c it's ideological not a cordoned off Alternative Identity that is accommodated by focusing on Love(tm) as the new border around whose existence we might begrudgingly accept at arm's length (i.e. being otherwise "normal"! just imagine swapping out the binary gender (or, deep breath, presumed Private Parts) of one partner in an exclusive romantic lifelong nuclear family marriage, & that is Gay / Trans Rights. still gross but maybe we can do it, as long as they don't talk about it or shove it in our faces or even exist for more than one encounter w/us in our lives b/c what are the odds). evergreen laughing at someone suggesting ableist logic might be embedded in language of past & present b/c it's just So little to ask for that it's irrelevant but it's also So much to ask for that of course i'm not gonna do anything more than pass it along like "this is why i don't take ableism seriously" like yeah it's the disabled randos like it's the individual cringe teens(tm) ruining [the cishets would take Gender seriously otherwise!!!] & that's why you won't think about it or do anything about it & continue being comfortable with the norm & resent that actually their Difference is Less & disability is something worse that ppl "excuse" & all these ways that people are & all these things that they do are funny & weird & inexplicable & etc & one can't possibly be cruising along perpetuating a hierarchy with a sense that you're reasonable, well meaning, kind, etc etc & thus Justified, systemic oppression definitely wants to maximize how uncomfortable & arduous it feels to everyone rather than push to make it more streamlined & rewarding to embrace, or at least accept, whatever superiority over others you're afforded

[howtofightwrite]

For a character that virtually can’t die and regenerates in order to keep living, how do you make action interesting? Emphasize they still feel pain, why they’re doing it?

I'm actually going to step back a bit from this question first, and complement it. This is a very honest question, and something most writers who include violence in their work, should really think about. Even if you don't think you have characters like this, you do.

Now, I'm going to dunk on Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw for a moment. Ages ago (I think it was in one of his Resistance reviews), Yahtzee described, “threatening to blow up the world,” as the laziest form of raising the stakes. Because, “hey, I live on a world.” He's mostly correct. Threatening your protagonist's life is even lazier. In the vast majority of cases, your audience knows you won't go through with it. That you won't kill off your protagonists.

With that in mind, when you decide your protagonist is completely immortal, that changes less about how you write them than you might expect. The biggest difference is simply that they're directly aware of their plot armor, rather than them engaging in faux indecision based on their perceived mortality. Again, this is something that every writer who uses violence should think about, at least a bit. It is natural for a character to fear for their life, and have reservations about risking their life, but making the part where your character's lives are on the line isn't automatically suspenseful. In a lot of cases (consciously or not), your audience will call your bluff, when you threaten to kill off a major character.

If you think back to major character deaths where something drops them without warning, part of what makes those scenes work is the lack of (apparent) setup. The writer didn't spend pages teasing you with the idea, they just went for the throat and ended that character on the spot. This is more respectful of your audience, because you're not telling them, “well, I might kill this character, or I might not.”

To be clear, I'm not saying that there's no place for teasing your audience with a character's impending demise, just pointing out that in a lot of cases, this won't generate the kind of suspense you'd hope for.

So, to get back on topic, how do you make it interesting? Remember that while this character can't die, the same is not true for the characters around them. Depending on the tone you're going for, you could create an absolutely brutal crucible effect, where everyone around your immortal gets burned off, sooner or later. Whether that's literal, or figurative, is up to you. Even if your character can't die, watching people they care about suffer and die is going to have an effect on them.

You probably don't need to draw special attention to the physical pain they experience, but you do want to be aware of it. Especially in the context of how pain affects the victim's behavior. Beyond that, there is probably an element of pain being far more annoying to the immortal than it would be to a normal person. They know it's not telling them anything meaningful, but it is distracting.

Long-term, both of these can easily result in personality shifts. And, legitimately, this is a scenario where a character may be immortal, but they would still experience significant changes over time, and with the growing emotional pain, could have very adverse effects on your personality. This does have some very real, “live long enough to see yourself become the villain,” potential. How many friends can you lose before you stop caring? How many funerals can you attend before you start taking the phrase, “you're either part of the solution or part of the problem,” a little too far? How many times can you pick yourself up off the pavement a blood-covered alleyway, surrounded by corpses, before you start to forget what made you human in the first place?

And, that's not the only option. The simplest answer for maintaining tension when one of your characters is immortal is keeping your eye on what they're trying to accomplish. Keep track of their objectives, because I guarantee they can fail those. Even just keeping their own nature concealed from the mortal world is probably fairly important, because of the idea that men in hazmat suits will drag them away to some research lab and poke them until they figure out how to replicate their immortality, is a classic (and potentially plausible) threat. (Bonus points, if you're wanting to loop in something like the medieval inquisitions, or some other secret societies that could pose this kind of a threat.)

So, what do you do? To dig out an old cliché threat, “there are fates worse than death,” and it's probably worth exploring them. This also opens up new possibilities for threats. Finally, it's worth remembering that immortality does not guarantee success. If your character is hoping for that, it might be time to give them a very harsh lesson.

-Starke

This blog is supported through Patreon. Patrons get access to new posts three days early, and direct access to us through Discord. If you’re already a Patron, thank you. If you’d like to support us, please consider becoming a Patron.

[yoon-kooks]

playboys & pancakes | jjk

⛓️pairing: hotnerd!jungkook x popular!reader

⛓️genre: smut, fluff, college!au

⛓️summary: When your fuckboy model friend Park Jimin returns from Paris, Jungkook can't help but feel a little jealous and protective over you even though the two of you aren't technically dating yet.

⛓️word count: 2.6k

⛓️warnings: catdilf!jk, dom!jk, sub!reader, daddy/kitten undertones, dirty talk, oc is a lil brat, boy gets jealous🤭, soft cuddling, jimin is a tattooed fuckboy, no explicit smut in this drabble

⛓️p&p masterlist⛓️

a/n: this was a cute lil drabble request for jealous!jjk!! if you make it all the way to the end, there ✨might✨ be a special teaser... lmk if yall would be interested👀

In the middle of class, Jungkook stares at the seat next time him where you’re busy giggling and texting away for some unknown reason. He’s dying to know the context so he can use it against you later to see that pretty smile once more.

“Hey you,” you whisper, leaning over in his direction. It’s rare for the two of you to talk in the classroom since you both agreed it was best to lay low about whatever the fuck this is between you and him. It must be something urgent. “Do you know any cute girls who are single right now?”

Jungkook just blinks at you in utter disbelief. You’re already sick of him, aren’t you? You’d rather fool around with some cute girl than fuck some loser who makes her finish her homework a week before it’s due. Well shit. It was fun while it lasted.

“Asking for a friend,” you add. Not helping, by the way. Could you make it any more obvious that you’re trying to break off this… arrangement between you and him? “My friend said he’s down bad.”

Wait.

You flash your phone screen in Jungkook’s face for him to read what you were presumably giggling about earlier.

Jimin🍄 [10:46AM] “A what tattoo?!🥵🍆”

Jimin🍄 [10:46AM] “Btw please tell me you know a cute girl who is as down bad as I am”

Jimin🍄 [10:47AM] “Paris was not as romantic as they make it out to be”

Y/N✨ [10:48AM] “hold on lemme ask the dilf”

The dilf has a lot of questions. The first being, “You have friends?” He’s mostly just teasing you for lacking genuine friendships despite being so popular, but this is the first time he’s heard you talk about a friend that wasn’t him.

“He’s a friend from high school,” you explain. “He’s been studying abroad for the past few years and just got back yesterday. I’m letting him crash at my place this weekend so we can catch up.”

Hmm. Jungkook wasn’t planning on sharing you with anyone this weekend, but this is a much better scenario than you outright abandoning him for someone else. In fact, he might even know just the right person to satisfy your friend’s needs.

“And why are you calling me a dilf—” 

He never gets an answer because the professor calls on you to answer a question on the board. You glance up and give the correct answer with no hesitation despite the distractions next to you and on your phone. Your nerdy side is just as attractive as your bubbly personality. 

He’s so lucky to have a girl like you.

“Jimin wants to have brunch with you tomorrow, by the way,” you say on Friday night as you snuggle closer to Jungkook on the couch. It’s one of those rare wholesome nights at his place where you aren’t dripping in pleasure, moaning your little heart out with him inside you. “I told him you’d hook him up with a baddie and now he wants to interrogate you to make sure you have good taste.”

“I think I have pretty good taste.” He looks right at your cute naked face with no makeup on. You’re also borrowing one of his oversized tees and using it as a nightshirt. Obviously, he has amazing taste.

“So you’ll come?” Your smile is so bright. How could he ever say no to that? “We can meet up with him there and go to my place after.”

“Sure,” he says. Besides, he’d like to see this Jimin guy for himself. From what you’ve said about him, he seems like a cool dude studying fashion design. But it’s also kind of fucked up that your closest friend abandoned you here without anyone else to rely on for all those years apart. It’s shitty to think how alone you must’ve felt until the two of you started talking barely a month ago.

“Cool, I think you’ll get along with him,” you yawn into his chest while twirling his hair around your finger. Thank god he decided to let his hair grow out so you could play with it as much as you want. “He’s like you but friendlier and fuckboy-ish.”

“If he’s friendly and fuckboy-ish, how is that like me?” Jungkook isn’t picking up what you’re putting down. He doesn’t like the sound of the fuckboy part, either.

“He has a lot of tattoos and a cute face, but he’s kind of mean in a teasing way. Just like you.” The twirling is slowing down. “A lot of people say he’s super attractive too.”

You reach for your phone that somehow ended up on the other side of the boy and pull up Jimin’s Instagram. Jungkook studies the page and clicks on a pic of your friend all suited up in Dior. Damn. Not only is he handsome, but he also knows how to pose and look good in photos. You kind of left out the part about him being an actual model.

Of course you have another attractive guy friend who enjoys teasing you. Of course this guy happens to be staying with you while he’s “down bad.” And of course Jeon Jungkook is not going to let himself feel a certain way about it.

The next morning, Jungkook wakes up to your arms wrapped around his waist as you’re still snoozing away on the couch. Very carefully, he peels your arms away one at a time, hops out of the blanket, and gives you his sleepy kitten to hold onto in place of him. You make this cute little whiny sound as you cuddle the cat.

Successful in leaving you undisturbed, the boy heads to his room and opens his sorry excuse of a closet. The majority of his wardrobe is just basic shit like hoodies, plain tees, ripped jeans, and sweats for the gym. He’s never really put a whole lot of thought into his fashion, but he woke up this morning with an urge to look somewhat good for brunch. It totally has nothing to do with that fashion model friend of yours.

After a good ten minutes of contemplation, he eventually goes with a nice crewneck and one of the few pairs of black jeans that aren’t all torn up. It’s just brunch anyway.

By then, you’ve woken up and thrown on that pretty beige sundress you left behind a few weeks ago. He’d conveniently washed it for you when he was doing a light load. Now you smell like his lavender laundry soap.

When the two of you get to the brunch place, you claim a booth and wait for Jimin to arrive. Your arm brushes against his as you flap through the menu. The booth is pretty spacious, and yet you’re sitting that close to him. He doesn’t mind, of course.

“I’m gonna get the pink strawberry waffles… but the chocolate banana pancakes look really good, too.” You point at the pictures like a child. “What about you?”

“Chocolate banana pancakes.” He didn’t have his mind made up until that very moment. You’re always stealing his food off his plate these days anyway. He might as well pick something you’ll enjoy.

“Ooh, good, now I can try it too,” you sing. Called it.

“Never said I was sharing,” Jungkook shakes his head. You both know he’s bluffing.

“What do I have to do for a taste?” you ask so innocently while leaning your soft tits against his arm. “Do you want me to get down on my hands and knees and suck dad—”

“Hi Y/N, hey Jungkook.” Your handsome model friend slides into the other side of the booth and interrupts your enticing proposal. Your eyes light up in a way Jungkook has never seen before.

“Jimin!” you smile.

“Hey,” Jungkook adds, a lot less enthusiastic than you. Of course Jimin is even better looking in person.

After ordering, you ask Jimin to spill the deets on his Paris adventures. In addition to an internship, he also did in fact spend some time modeling for a few luxury brands. Now that he’s back home, he’s planning on taking it easy for a bit before moving forward with fashion design. 

So that’s why he’s asking for a baddie to kill time with. He can have anyone he wants as long as it’s not you.

As the two friends catch up, Jungkook notices the way you lean forward toward the other boy and laugh at nearly everything he says—although to be fair, he is a pretty funny and charming guy. That’s the kind of guy that would complement your playful personality so well.

The food comes shortly after, and you stare intensely at Jimin’s French toast even though you have a pretty pink waffle right in front of you and Jungkook’s pancakes right beside you.

“Really? The guy who just got back from France ordered French toast?” you snicker, turning to Jungkook to get him on your side. He chuckles, but only because you’re cute when you’re being mischievous.

“Would you like some, Y/N?” Jimin waves off your silliness. He must be used to it because it hardly affects him the way it affected Jungkook.

“Yes, please.” You cut off a small piece of French toast and go in for a taste. It gets not one but two thumbs up from you.

“Still a foodie, I see,” Jimin observes. You nod. He must’ve been the one you were dragging around to different food places back in high school. But now that’s Jungkook’s job, and he’d like to keep it that way.

So Jungkook waits. He waits patiently for you to ask for a taste of his food. After all, he ordered the chocolate banana pancakes with you in mind.

But instead, you’re minding your own business and digging into your pink waffle. Weren’t you offering a whole blowjob for a taste of his pancakes a little while ago? Now you suddenly don’t want it because he’d joked about not sharing it? This is stressing him out more than it should. 

You turn and catch the boy next to you aggressively sawing through his pile of pancakes with his butter knife. Hopefully you don’t pick up on his distress.

“Are the pancakes goo—” Before you can finish your question, a few freshly cut pancake pieces are plopped onto your plate beside the pink waffle.

“You said you wanted to try it, didn’t you?” Jungkook tries his best to sound nonchalant about the whole ordeal. 

Your Surprised Pikachu face quickly turns into a smug look. “Thought you weren’t sharing,” you hum as you indulge in the moist chocolatey delight. At the same time, your free hand casually runs along the boy’s inner thigh and gives it a squeeze under the table. Playing innocent might be part of your personality, but you know exactly what you’re doing to him. “The pancakes are yummy, by the way.”

Still, your touch is as much of a comfort as it is a turn-on.

“So, are you still interested in the hot girl Jungkook knows?” you ask Jimin. Jungkook hasn’t even shown you a pic of the girl, and yet you’re already hyping her up. You also aren’t aware that it’s someone he’s slept with in the past, but he’ll address that another time.

“Listen, when I said I was down bad,” Jimin lowers his voice, “I meant I need to get laid as soon as possible.”

“Damn, what happened in Paris? Who hurt you?” you frown as you take a big sip of coffee.

“I’ll spill the tea later,” he sighs. Looks like it’s still a touchy subject.

To lift the other boy’s spirit a little, Jungkook pulls up an Instagram page filled with a ton of colorful floral tattoos. If you scroll down enough, you might even find a few pics of his tattoos there too.

“She’s a tattoo artist.” He rolls up his sleeve and points out a few floral pieces that match the style from the Instagram page. “She doesn’t really post pics of herself, but she probably has more tattoos and piercings than me.”

“And she’s hot,” you add in even though that’s already been established.

“I’ll ask if she’s free.” Jungkook pulls up her contact info and shoots her a message. She responds right away.

Jungkook🐍 [11:39AM] “Do you have time for a walk-in today?”

Jungkook🐍 [11:39AM] “I know a guy who’s interested in you”

???🌼 [11:40AM] “😳”

Jungkook🐍 [11:40AM] “interested in your tattoos**”

???🌼 [11:40AM] “😔”

???🌼 [11:41AM] “todays been slow pls send him my way thx”

???🌼 [11:41AM] “tell him he gets a discount if hes cute”

???🌼 [11:41AM] “IM KIDDING PLS DONT TELL HIM THAT ILL GET CANCELED”

“Yeah she’s free right now,” Jungkook says, trying to keep a straight face. “I’ll give you the address to her studio.”

“Ooh, perfect,” you squeak at Jimin who still doesn’t look completely sold on the whole thing. “You can scout it out as soon as we’re done here.”

“Wait, are you sure it’s okay? I know I said I needed this asap, but I’m mostly here to visit you,” he says.

“Well, now that you’re back from overseas, we can hang out anytime. I’m not going anywhere,” you assure him, downing the rest of your coffee. You’re such a good friend. “And besides, it could be life-changing sex waiting for you at the tattoo shop.”

Jimin nods at your encouragement. “Alright, you’ve convinced me. I’ll go.”

“Good.” You slide your ass right over Jungkook’s lap to get out of the booth. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t lean into it a little. “Be right back. I drank too much liquid.”

With you off to the bathroom, Jungkook sits alone across from the other boy. It always gets awkward when the mutual friend disappears. What are they supposed to talk about now that you’re gone?

“So… are you two, like, dating…?” Jimin wastes no time in addressing the elephant in the room. “Y/N always avoids the question whenever I ask.”

“What makes you ask?” The question is mostly to stall time until you get back, but Jungkook is also curious to know what you’ve said about him.

“The way she talks about you makes it seem like you guys are married,” he chuckles. Wow, he has a charming eye smile too. Jungkook would’ve been threatened by that level of charm, but he seems to have already let go of that feeling. “She told me you’re raising a kitten together and that you’re always scolding or spoiling it like a true dilf—her words, not mine. She won’t shut up about how you’ll make a good dad one day.”

At least he knows where the dilf propaganda comes from now. He’ll admit it’s a lot more wholesome than he thought. You really do just gush about him to your best friend. Maybe you feel the same way he does when it comes to this unestablished relationship between you and him. 

Maybe you also want something more.

When you return, you finish up your food, split the bill, and send Jimin on his way to the tattoo studio. Hopefully, it goes well for him. Not because Jungkook is worried the other boy might turn around and try something funny on you, but because he wants any friend of yours to experience the same type of feelings he feels when he’s with you. Damn. He wasn’t expecting to get all gushy this weekend, but he’s not going to fight it either.

“What’d you guys talk about while I was in the bathroom?” you ask on the way back to the car.

“Not much,” Jungkook shrugs. “Just about you calling me a dilf.”

“Oh no, I feel so exposed,” you whine in your favorite sarcastic tone. Then you turn to him and bat your lashes. Brat. “Am I wrong, though?”

a/n: okay i dont normally put notes like this at the end of my fics, but im gonna tease a potential jimin spinoff💖 lmk what you guys think!

⛓️pairing: model!jimin x tattooartist!reader

⛓️genre: smut, fluff, fwb2l, possible angst (??)

⛓️summary: After breaking up with your on-and-off boyfriend for hopefully the last time, an old fling sends his handsome model friend to your tattoo studio. And apparently, he’s as done with love as you are.

⛓️warnings: jimin & oc are both heartbroken and starved for sex (as you might have noticed from this drabble lol), oc is an actual baddie with tattoos everywhere and a belly piercing, there will be a lot more warnings if i decide to go through with this!

[uhgood-girl]

someone (hi, @sweetjikook, careful what you ask for, idk if this is what you wanted lol) asked me what my thoughts are on current jikook in my last post and in an attempt to not be redundant with all of the information already out there, all i can really think about is offering everyone some insight/context on a situation that i know a lot of people probably don't have experience with but i do.

have you ever been in relationship you had to hide?

but between just you and me, having everyone convinced i'm really bad at it is part of the self defense mechanism i built in a long time ago to make sure that when i have to lie, about the more serious things, the things that matter, no one can call my bluff. because i'm actually really good at it. i wasn't given a choice not to be.

how good of a liar are you? me, personally, if you were to ask, i would tell you i'm an awful one. just absolutely no good, can't control my face, i have skin that's prone to blushing (me + seokjin = 1 whole tomato), and even if i manage to get the lie out, it won't take me long to break. and these days, for the most part, that is delightfully true. most of my lies now are white or just silly, meant to be discovered immediately. i have significantly less to lose and am in a space that doesn't require that sort of skill in me anymore.

having to pretend you don't love someone when you really, really do is not for the faint of heart. for every moment alone you can steal together, those precious hours, or if you're lucky days, where no one else is around and you can finally let out all of the pent up affection and desire just to be close to each other that has been building up for who knows how long, there is far more time simply spent alone. alone, as in by yourself and then the type of alone in a crowded room, your partner visible and right there, but as good as miles away for all the ability you have to be near them how you would prefer to be. it's a special sort of hell, to be frank, and the only reason it's worth it is if you and the other person can some how make it work in spite. and i do mean in spite, because there are so many things to spite in those circumstances, but i digress.

truthfully (lol okay, but really), i think when you can ignore the reasons you're having to do it in the first place, there's something rather romantic about hiding. i'm not the first person to write about it and think so. it really does heighten the whole relationship experience. every secret smile shared, every touch stolen, every love letter slipped between the pages of a book passed back and forth in the hall, between classes, (don't romanticize your trauma, folks. do as i say, not as i do) it's low key addictive.

you know when you're in a group and someone says something bizarre and your eyes find your partner already staring back at you with an expression that confirms you're both thinking the exact same thing? that lightning zap of recognition down your spine, a warmth rushing your head and chest because there are few greater feelings than to know and be known, dearly, intimately? it's a little like that, but every single time you look at each other because what you're sharing, it's always a secret. and when it's just you and someone else against the world, it fosters a very specific type of camaraderie and trust, because there are real stakes at play if you mess up. if you are discovered, you risk safety, reputation, and worst case scenario permanent separation, just to name a few.

now, before we continue, i want to take a second and make sure you're not letting any potential preconceived notions about lying, that it's always bad, that thou shall not do it, whatever, cast any sort of moral judgements on the liar. we don't have time or room for that here. if you've never been in an environment where lying was required of you at the risk of yours or worse, someone you love, their well-being, good for you, i hope that never changes. but i ask that you take a second to recognize that lying is not always a negative, deceit not always malicious in intent.

you know who i think is a really good liar? jungkook. are you surprised? good, he's doing it right. call it "it takes one to know one" maybe, but i've watched our little baby star candy get wise fast over the years and at this point, he's got hiding in plain sight (i'm sorry, it's too applicable, iykyk) aka lying by omission down pat. he and i think everyone else involved, actually, knows that most people are going to go out of their way to explain his and jimin's actions as something else. homophobia in this case is both the sword and shield, as is the convenient culture of skinship and the rest of bangtan's puppy tornado physical affection with each other. i'm not saying they wouldn't be like that anyway, i think they would, i'm just saying it's a very convenient smokescreen for people trying to hide otherwise.

also, i'm not trying to make anyone here sound like some sort of evil mastermind, but it's my own personal theory that a lot of the more incriminating situations we've seen on camera were on purpose. whether pushed by jikook themselves (ehh) or the company (probably the latter, bc they're sure as hell in the know), i think something like having an obvious hickey and the culprit's admitting to it was a bit of a boundary test to see just how much they could get away with. people are explaining it away as something totally normal between friends? excellent, write that down.

i, for one, am glad for it. someone out of that pairing needs to be good at it and it is not mr. park lol. jimin is great at so so many things, look, i think he's a slytherin too, but just cunning and ambition does not a good liar make. his "flaw" is his sincerity, he means things too much. it's why those early years of him crushing on jk feel so painfully palpable. it's why you're not going to catch him in a live with the other man, at least not a spontaneous one, anytime soon. (he can't even play it cool in the comments, be so for real right now. on that note, jk isn't necessarily playing it cool either in those lives, but people are faster to write his actions off like i discussed above, for whatever reason suits them, and he knows it.) jimin protects himself and jk by not putting himself in unplanned situations where he's forced to lie to anyone's face (if he can help it) in the first place. it's one of the reasons we've gotten, imo, some of the most insightful answers about jikook from him directly (i love waking up and seeing him, i would want to have him with me if i was stranded on an island, etc.) because if you put him on the spot, 9 times out of 10 he's going to tell some form of the truth.

jk means things too, please don't think i'm accusing him of being disingenuous, i just think he's filled in for what jimin lacks and in this case and particular situation, jimin lacks a single false bone in his body. and really good partnerships have that sort of synchronicity, no? it's one of the reasons i think they work so well, why they've made it this far. that, and i really do think they have all of bangtan and the company behind them too, but that's a different post.

so, my thoughts overall on current jikook aren't really all that different from the perception i have had of them over the last few years. i think they're together and experiencing all of the ups and downs that come with every long term relationship with the unfortunate added pressure of not being able to be open about it (+ being world famous idols + living in an openly homophobic country + impending enlistment ++++ a 100 other things. the cards are really stacked here, sadly.) though, because of idol culture, it's not like they could be open even if they were in het relationships, something that i think is both shitty but also helps them in the long run. and again, i have been in this long enough now that i don't really sweat "evidence" that comes out against them while they are still being loud in their own way. if anything, depending on what it is, i like it because it is further cover for a couple with a whole hell of a lot to potentially lose if they're genuinely exposed. (when i say i like it, this does not include videos of jk potentially being stalked. and my shortest response i could give you in regard to those videos are 1. if it's him, fuck those videos and the people who filmed them, i hope you rot, i didn't see anything that makes me change my opinion of jikook. 2. if it's not him, fuck those responsible and the whole concept still but more ground cover for jikook at least.)

this too is why i'm not particularly bothered by people shipping them with other members. i know i keep emphasizing it, but when the name of the game here is HIDE, every misdirection is a boon. if tae wants to get on live and talk about jk and how close they are, knowing that it will cause a certain faction of people to be loud afterward, so be it. those are literally his best friends/brothers and if taking some of the heat lets them slip further into the background, tae has shown himself to be extremely protective of those he cares about and uniquely clever (now, whether jikook still want him to be doing that at this point can be debated, but i still think his overall intentions are probably good. though don't get me started on how that misdirection is potentially working in his own favor as well lol)

end of day, being in a relationship you have to hide is really fucking hard. it is stressful and painful and heartbreaking and you spend so much time terrified for yourself and your partner that on long nights when you are alone again and you have cried yourself to exhaustion for the nth time, you wonder if it's really worth it, if maybe the purest act of love you could give someone is just letting them go. and if you are unlucky, as i was, the choice is eventually taken away from you altogether. your relationship ends because the world steps in and puts mountains between you and this is not fiction but real life, so you are young and powerless to do anything about it. i wouldn't wish it on an enemy, much less people i really care for. if i'm being really super duper honest here, sometimes the thought of jikook not actually being in a relationship feels like relief to me.

obviously i dont think our situations are perfectly comparable, the main thing being they've kind of already made it. they're adults with their own homes and money and elaborate support systems that seem to include their family and closest friends. if they were exposed tomorrow, who's to say it would even ruin their careers, bangtan have made such an impact on the world at this point it's not a sure thing. but still. it would hurt, needlessly so. it wouldn't be a walk in the park by any means. even if they ever come out on their own, on their own terms, it won't be easy and i simply wish the world was not that way. i think it's really fucking stupid that the world is still this way.

so i know for me, personally, if we ever get confirmation that they're not together...okay. i think my heart will simultaneously clench and unclench. i think i will secretly maintain that they were together at some point, honestly you can snatch that belief from my cold dead hands, but i will not be upset that two people i (parasocial? we still don't know her) care deeply for are suddenly at less a certain type of risk of being harmed.

but until they stop being so loud for anyone paying attention on main, i will be right here, rooting for them to beat the odds. if anyone could, i think it's them.

[sgiandubh]

Hi! I wasn’t around for the chateau marmont photo either, so I don’t know what’s already been discussed. It does kind of look like there’s more of the grass to the left (our left) of the woman in white though. Sure looks like ugly decor, but 🤷🏻‍♀️. Doesn’t change my opinion that Sam and caitriona are together, but I think some of the possible photoshops are hard to be sure of. Definitely appreciate the speculation though!

Dear Chateau Marmont Anon,

If you take five minutes of your time and read the comments thread, two veterans (@mariaae and @dillon7fan) confirmed the picture was never discussed before being posted on 'that ol blunt knife blog' (I see you and now I know there is a definite shortage of capital letters in Spain).

And then, there's you, to whom I am willing to grant the benefit of the doubt.

Work with me:

You write, and I quote you: It does kind of look like there’s more of the grass to the left (our left) of the woman in white though.

You mean, this smiling lady?

That is not grass, my dear. That is, most probably, a ficus tree (but I stand corrected, I am no expert in these).

But that is not the big problem I have with this bizarre picture, featuring outdoorsy bistrot chairs and yes, a lot of greenery.

In all honesty and fairness, here is an interesting picture of Chateau Marmont's very indoor/outdoor restaurant. The nay contest outdoor area - furniture is a perfect match and there are shrubs (happy?):

Let's suppose the pic was taken on the patio area, facing the fancy covered structure that looks like a tent. Something still does not really click and I am pretty sure there's either a problem of angle or a matter of scale.

Not being a gardener, I asked myself if there is a standard height for this kind of privacy/screening shrubs. I found something very interesting, on the site of a Californian landscape professional established since 1869 (https://pacificnurseries.com/great-hedge-screen-plants-for-privacy/) and I have to say the suggested scale matches the picture:

Let's add 2 inches to this rough estimate, upping it to 3 feet and 2 inches (96 centimeters). In the context, the two inches are negligible, because these shrubs grow rather fast and are regularly pruned.

If we assume the leg length represents about half the person's height, well... we reach a height of about 6 feet and 4 inches, which means 193 centimeters. There are scientific reasons to this ratio, by the way, but do not ask me to elaborate on it (specialized input is always a big plus):

I do not remember Tracula to be that commanding. I can, however, think of someone whose height is very close to that result.

So, in a nutshell, it's a pick your adventure scenario, Anon. Either:

a) that is a (photoshopped) grass background and the guy can bilocate better than Star Trek's Data.

b) that's a shrub and the height of that person (body?) does not match Tracula's.

In all fairness, I think that's a shrub. I have no problem acknowledging my wrongs and my limits.

I also have another question: is Tracula documented as wearing watches? I am being very honest here and could do with your feedback.

Is that proof? It's another layer of speculation. I am not megalomaniac, thank God.

It's never (never, ever) waterproof with these people.

[devildom-drabbles]

Hi! I started reading some of your stories and I would like to make a request! Mc confessed their affections to Mammon and being a flustered mess, Mammon accidentally turns them down harshly. Afterwards Mc out of heartbreak won’t talk to Mammon. time goes by and Mc becomes friends with Mammon again but likes Lucifer after Lucifer was there for Mc during the heartbreak. A couple of years goes by and Mammon is at the wedding wondering what would have happened if he hadn’t been such a flustered mess. (If you need more context please feel free to message me!)

Oof, what a heart-wrenching scenario... 😭 I apologize for the delay in responding to this, as I really wanted to make sure I felt good with how this came out. Thanks for the prompt! Enjoy!

Story - No Next Time

Main Characters: Mammon and MC Other Character: Lucifer Word Count: ~1.7k Warnings: Angst and swearing

Since the beginning of the ceremony, Mammon’s gaze never left MC.  He studied every detail of their appearance, from the way their white attire and accessories adorned their body to how their eyes crinkled as they grinned wider than they ever had before.  They were perfect.  No, they were always perfect to Mammon.  Rather, on this momentous occasion, they seemed to shine brighter than usual, as if to remind him of his new permanent place in their life.  

When MC reached out their hand in his direction, Mammon’s fingers twitched at his side, eager to accept their hand into his own.  But alas, another demon was given the honor of holding it.  Mammon unconsciously balled his hand into a fist as his eyes trailed over to the recipient, the one wearing pristine white garments that complimented MC’s:  his older brother Lucifer.  The happy couple looked at each other like they were the only two beings in existence—in their own love-filled little world—while Mammon stood off to the side with the rest of his younger brothers.  In order to prevent himself from making a scene on this special day, Mammon briefly tore his attention away from the pair to stare at his feet, his nearly-crumbling expression reflecting in his polished black shoes.

How did it turn out this way?

“I like you, Mammon.”

MC spoke those words so sincerely—a confession straight from the heart despite their nerves.  A gentle blush caressed their cheeks as they did their best to keep steady eye contact with him.

“Wh-What the hell are ya sayin’?!”

Mammon’s response shot out like ridicule because of his nerves.  He was caught off-guard by MC’s declaration, making his face flush more than theirs and his eyes dart away from them.  This was a dream come true for him, but it was all too sudden.  His heart was pounding harder than all of the times he’d run for his life from debt collectors; his head was spinning like an excited kid on a teacups ride; and his stomach was ready to burst out an army of butterflies.  He wanted to tell them that he felt the same way toward them—that he liked them for the longest time but never knew how to vocalize it.  Instead, his flustered state in that moment rendered him unable to think straight, so he ended up blurting out what sounded like the complete opposite of what he wanted:

“Are ya serious?  I mean, a human like you, in love with the Great Mammon?  I won’t accept just anyone as my partner, ya know!”

The hope in MC’s expression faded away.  “...Oh.”

No, no, that wasn’t right, Mammon realized.  He had to fix this, fast!  “Er, uh, well, I deserve the best, yeah?  So, when I think about you and our time together, it only makes sense that we—”

“I get it, Mammon.  You’re not interested.  Just stop.”

MC turned away to leave the room, but Mammon managed to grab their arm before they could.

“W-Wait, MC, that’s not—”

“I said, ‘stop!’”  Tears pricked at the corners of MC’s eyes when they glared back at the demon.  “Please...  You’ve told me enough.”

The pain evident in the human’s face was contagious, squeezing the life out of Mammon’s whole body.  He couldn’t maintain his grip on their arm when they roughly pulled away from him, nor could he utter a single word that would help to clear their misunderstanding.  He could only stare blankly ahead until MC’s figure was no longer in view.

“...It only makes sense that we be together, because you’re the best to me, MC...  Dammit.  DAMMIT!  Why didn’t I just say that?!”

Mammon knew he screwed up, and after spending a bit of time sulking and beating himself up for what he said to MC, he was determined to rectify the situation.  However, MC wanted nothing to do with him.  They blatantly avoided him for weeks, refusing to speak to him in person or over the phone and spending more time with others so that he had almost no chance to approach them alone.  This created tension whenever the two of them happened to be in the same room together, and Mammon was getting tired of his brothers’ comments about “how terrible” and “how much of an idiot” he was toward MC.  He didn’t want this to continue, but the human wasn’t making it easy for him to fix things.  It reached a point where he missed their company so much that he didn’t even care if they never forgave him—he just wanted them to look at him, to respond to him with their voice, to act like he existed again.

Then one day, the silent treatment came to an end.

“Y-You forgive me?!”

“For turning me down, yes.”

“And for what I said, too, right?  ‘Cause I really didn’t mean—”

“It’s fine, Mammon.  You don’t have to explain yourself.  I freaked you out with my confession, so your response came out harsher than you intended.  Lucifer helped me understand that.”

“Lucifer...?”

“Yeah, he’s been a big help while I’ve been sorting out my feelings.  And I want to apologize, too, for not giving you the chance to tell me that yourself and for just ignoring you all the time instead.  Can we...be friends again?  I miss hanging out with you.”

“...Yeah.  Sounds good.  Let’s do that.”

Except, Mammon didn’t want to be friends—he wanted to be more.  MC had given him the chance to take that next step in their relationship, but he blew it.  He needed to rebuild what they had lost after that “rejection,” so starting with being friends again was the best way to do that.  Then, once the two of them were closer, he’d confess his true feelings for them.   

Next time, for sure, he’d get it right.

A few months later, Mammon stood nervously in front of MC’s bedroom door with a single plastic wrapped flower, tied with a ribbon in the human’s favorite color, hidden behind him.  This was it.  He was going to tell MC he loved them without any mistakes or misinterpretations.  Nothing was going to mess this up for him.  A deep breath and a knock on the door summoned the human in front of him, dressed in nice clothes that caused an unconscious “wow” to escape the demon’s lips.  They giggled while he cleared his throat out of embarrassment.

“It’s a great outfit, right?”

“I-It ain’t half bad.  But what are ya all dressed up for anyway?  It looks like you’re ready for a date!”

“I am, actually.”

Mammon almost dropped the flower.  “Wh-What?!  But who—”

MC’s phone went off, signaling that they received a text.  A giddy smile slowly stretched across the human’s face as they read over the message, and although such a sight would normally make Mammon’s heart do backflips, it sank deep into the pit of his stomach from knowing that he wasn’t the reason for their joy.  When they moved to tuck their phone away, Mammon noticed Lucifer’s name at the top of the screen.

“Sorry, I have to get going now.  Let’s talk later, OK?”

And with that, MC hurried toward the entrance hall of the house, leaving Mammon behind to deal with his messy feelings for a second time.

Lucifer...  He had been spending more time with MC than usual lately, but Mammon figured it was related to the RAD student exchange program.  And when he thought about it, MC had been mentioning Lucifer often in a positive manner during their conversations, including how he was “much kinder than he seemed.”  Mammon cursed himself for not paying more attention to what the two of them were doing alone together in favor of focusing on his own plans to strengthen his bond with MC.  But surely they’d come back from this date and tell Mammon all about how boring Lucifer was and how they would’ve much rather done something with him that evening.  Then, he’d have his chance to make his move.

That chance never came.  MC had a great time with Lucifer that night and the dates that followed, and soon enough, they made their relationship known to everyone.  Whenever the two of them were together, it was clear to Mammon how in love they were, how they brought out the best in each other, and how they were happier than they’d ever been before.  He couldn’t deny that Lucifer treated MC right.

But he could treat MC better.  He was sure of it.  

MC just needed to see the meaning behind the gifts Mammon gave them, the hangouts he planned for them, his recollection of all their favorite things, and his willingness to always put them first.  He was confident that his actions would greatly make up for where his words failed him, that everything he did would shout “I love you” loud and clear.

It wasn’t until MC announced their engagement with Lucifer that Mammon realized the foolishness of that belief.  He should’ve said those three words out loud a long time ago, directly to them, so they’d know exactly how he truly felt.

Now, MC was across from Lucifer to exchange wedding vows, unaware of the trembling stance of the other demon nearby who loved them first.

It should’ve been me, Mammon thought.

It should’ve been him in Lucifer’s place right now.  He should be the one preparing to spend the rest of MC’s life with them.  He should be receiving affection from the human more precious to him than all the money in existence, and even giving them his overflowing love in return.

But it was too late.  Mammon couldn’t change the past.  And as much as he wanted to cry his objections in the middle of the wedding ceremony, he wanted his brother and the human he held dear to be happy.  And if they were happiest together, then so be it.  He’d congratulate them afterwards with a smile so bright, no one would suspect the pain and regret buried deep behind it.

[jaimetheexplorer]

I see the focus being so much on how much Jimmy's sentence can be reduced by, but I see so many possibilities to continue his and Kim's story, even if he were to stay in prison for a long time or, god forbid, forever?

Mind you, this comes with a number of caveats that are predicated on the way the show portrayed this particular prison ending. So I'm taking that artistic license and brainstorming in the context of this particular fictional universe and how things seem to work in it, rather than how it would work in the real world (and I'm also putting aside the ethical and philosophical debate on the prison system; will post more about that one I get my thoughts in order - but, for the record, I am not a prison apologist at all).

Extremely good behavior could lead to a things like special temporary dispensations, special contact or visits privilege, parole, house arrest, transfer to a low-security facility, etc etc. There's also the option of Jimmy collaborating with law enforcement as some kind of "expert" to help stop big, dangerous scams or something like that. From Kim's side of things, I could see her deciding to move so she can be closer to him, since she has nothing meaningful tying her to anywhere in particular. She could, in whatever capacity she'll re-enter the legal profession, potentially help him win some of these privileges.

So even if he's not released, I think it's possible to headcanon a number of scenarios where he might not quite get a HEA with Kim, where it would still be bittersweet, but they can slowly rebuild as full a relationship as the circumstances allow (civil lawsuit on Kim pending too). I can't imagine Kim choosing to "settle" for some version of her Florida life, over taking whatever crumbs she can have with the love of her life. She's never been the type to settle, or show interest in what she's not truly passionate about. I think they'd take whatever they can have.

PS: Again, do not @ me with "this would never happen in the real prison/legal system because X, Y, and Z" since it's clear to me from the way they portray ADX (I'm pretty sure someone wouldn't be able to sneak inside that facility just because they happen to have a non-expired bar ID, or that interview rooms don't have cameras to see that these two are just chilling and smoking, or that a prisoner can just hang around making bread and loitering in the courtyard) that they weren't particularly interested in making things realistic per se, as much as using his incarceration as the bitter in the bittersweet ending.

[crimmson]

okay before I say what I'm about to say:

1) we believe in and actively participate in nuance on this blog, crimmson.tumblr.com

2) I am acutely aware that this is at least partially a "me" problem; I am also aware that the ratio of "me problem":"not-me problem" could very well skew heavily toward being entirely a "me problem"

3) I know I'm some flavor of neurodivergent, what flavor that is is between me and god and I'm not talking to god to find out what that combination of flavors is at this time

4) I'm human, you're probably human, and sometimes that means being nonsensical and contradictory (I do not control the brain chemistry)

okay? okay.

so now. the thing. the thing that bothers me to no end: When You're Talking About Something And Someone Is Trying To Be Relatable But They Kinda Just Make It About Them, Even If Unintentionally. i hate this. I hate it so much.*

*it is highly dependent on who is doing it, how well I know them, how it's phrased and delivered, and a dozen other factors. sometimes and with some people I'm completely fine with it.

"but crimm! isn't that a trait of some neurodivergent people?" yeah I know! and I get the reasoning behind it! I still fucking hate it! (see points 1 through 4)

I'm going to outline my thought process (also applies to when I'm listening to someone else and I can see the conversation getting away from them; if you've been in a group call with me and I bark at you to let Person continue, well, you already know).

So here's a fictional scenario and my thought process:

I am telling a story among a group of people. so it is My Turn for attention (something I generally avoid and prefer to play more of a supporting or sidekick role so if I'm going for it, it's like... meaningful for me or whatever)

Branch A: someone interjects with a reaction or a comment; this is fine and it's a clue to me that you're listening which I appreciate. however it snowballs with everyone building onto the joke or comment and becomes a whole other conversation.

Branch B: someone interjects with a "oh hey something similar happened to me," and begins telling their story instead.

I wasn't actually done with my story though

combo of feelings ensues: nobody was actually listening or cared enough about what I was saying since they don't seem to notice or care that I didn't finish, being steamrolled by someone else who usurps my Moment of Attention, feels like someone turned it into a competition or had to one-up me, couldn't let me feel Special for 5 seconds, etc etc

(also really annoys me when I'm watching this happen to someone else, I just think other people should have their Moment and get to bask in it for a minute rather than getting immediately one-upped)

((if anything it annoys me way more when it's happening to other people))

(((Once again, see points 1 through 4 at the top)))

listen. I try really hard to keep it in mind that people are doing this as a means of trying to relate and prove that they are paying attention, showing empathy, sympathy, etc, I know all this. but I'm tired of pretending that it doesn't impact me or other people. I can HEAR the upset in other people when they're getting steamrolled and the conversation is getting away from them before they've finished saying their piece, or they're constantly getting cut off, etc.

it feels....childish? to say "oh it's just a neurodivergent trait! they can't help it!" and just expect it to go unchallenged all the time? like dude 1) we aren't a monolith 2) if I had to learn how to socialize then can't someone else learn to read the fucking room and shut up for a minute? not all the time, but maybe like 50/50? please?? compromise????

(once again, reminder: points 1 through 4)

like I'll go out of my way not to change subjects too fast so that people can have their minute in the spotlight. even if there's something I was gonna post. but if someone beat me to it, that's a-ok and I'll wait a few minutes to an hour depending on context so I'm not taking attention away from them. but like it always kinda weirds me out when someone posts about their day, and then like 30 seconds later someone else starts talking about themselves or something totally unrelated to the other person's message instead.

thankfully my group is generally pretty good about things and even if we get off track for a moment we will apologize and tell the person to continue. (or I yell at everyone for a second when I sense The Upset, and then tell the person to continue, and thankfully everyone seemingly does not outright hate me for this)

So with the knowledge that I fucking hate when people do that to me, I make sure I don't fucking do that to the best of my ability. I wish I could say it was hard, or a habit I had to develop, but like... it's not. It's not hard, I didn't have to work to Not Do The Thing I Hate (or if I did have to work on it, it's been so long that I genuinely don't remember), and I have been employing this strategy below for as long as I can remember. It's not something I have to think about anymore.

My Strategy For Conversation And Making Sure The Person Knows I Am Engaged And Interested And They Feel Valued:

I ask questions. it seems to keep the conversation going and they get to expand on details and stuff. it seems especially nice if it feels like they were trying to avoid taking too much time but now they feel like you do actually want to hear what they're saying and they can relax. at least that's the vibe I get. I can hear when their voice changes and they relax or get excited or whatever.

If I interject with a comment or joke, I will make sure I end it with like a "but keep going" to encourage them to keep talking (sometimes a little apology just to politely signal that I acknowledge my interruption)

if I interject with a comment, it's about THEIR story, not a "oh that reminds me of the time I..." so like, if someone is telling a story about... Idk, John From Work Said Something Fucking Stupid, then my comment might be something like postulating about what the fuck John's thought process was to get to that point of Saying Something Fucking Stupid. but it's something that THEY can build off of to continue THEIR story.

idk man. I just. I watch it happen in chat sometimes and I bite my tongue because I'm trying to be considerate and I don't even know if it bothers the other people who, in my mind, are getting interrupted or not getting a minute to soak in their moment of attention. like I could very well just be getting pissed off on behalf of other people who didn't even think twice about it. so like yeah, could 10000% be a me problem!

but I'm a big fan of the concept that an explanation is not an excuse! yes I am glad I understand these traits and tendencies and it does help me be tolerant of them to a degree when I know the intent is good. but it feels like I have to be tolerant of it all the time, otherwise I risk being anti-neurodivergent or something. which is very funny because I have ADHD, I've had anxiety, I've had depression and (this is the only time I'm going to acknowledge this) there's a pretty solid chance I'm autistic to some degree (we will never speak of this again).

I am okay with the knowledge that I'm just gonna be socially incompatible with some people but idk man. I know it probably comes down to like Clear Communication because obviously how will people know it annoys you and work toward a potential compromise if you don't say anything!

but if you think I'm gonna go "hey, half of the friend group, I fucking hate this thing you do sometimes because I'm mentally ill 12 ways to Sunday" then you are out of your fucking mind, I would rather wear cinderblock shoes and swandive into the Mariana trench

(also one last time, Points 1 through 4)

((and no this isn't about anyone in particular and wasn't even triggered by any specific event, I am literally just laying in bed eating chips and watching YouTube videos and decided to be a bitch on a whim))

[cielhunternorwood]

NIKKE: Goddess of Slapdashery

So what if I told you there was a game where you could play a third-person shooter where you get to look at ass every time you shoot a gun, and also your character is an anime waifu in oft-times skimpy clothing?

I'd say to go try out the Nanako mod on Fallout 4 because it's much more engaging and fun, especially with how janky and stupid Fallout 4 is. At least the story is more coherent.

NIKKE is basically what happens when the love of ass overcomes the love of tits, but you need context for people to see all the ass, so you create a "cover"-based shmup to justify girls jutting their booty in your face like they're in a strip club. But then no actual thoughts go into anything else, so it just "borrows" from other games/anime to make something minimally cohesive to string players along.

Is it good? No. Is it bad? No. It just is. There's not enough content- much less unique content- to the game to generate hate or love. Let's break it down.

UI/Graphics: It exists/10

So, the UI for NIKKE is... It's there. I can't say much because it borrows a lot of elements from other games like Blue Archive, Girls' Frontline, and so on. It's also fairly buggy as it takes several pokes at times to open options and sometimes refuses to let you interact at all, forcing a restart. I think the big issue is the UI waffles between two different styles with no real consistency.

Graphics-wise, imagine a PS1 game using the Build Engine- the game engine used by Duke Nukem 3D/Blood/etc- for combat. That's basically it. The "maps" for story chapters have you control 3D chibis that aren't low-poly but are low-detailed, and the maps themselves are very poorly-textured. I know it's a mobile game, but other mobile games have way better textures than this on 3D stuff.

In-battle graphics aren't too special either, considering they do the 2.5D thing: all the enemies, girls, and cover objects are 2D images propped up along a plane to give an illusion of 3D. It can be a bit jarring, especially when there are actual 3D enemies as bosses which are visually unimpressive (knock-off God Eater designs and whatnot) and often janky in animation. Also the special effects are excessive and tend to cover up enemies too much.

Overall, it just looks cheap, especially seeing as they went the extra mile on Live2D for the girls. Or maybe not, since most of the motions the girls can do I've seen done in GFL, so maybe I'm just assuming it's the extra mile.

Gameplay: Not so good/10

So, it's a mobile game that's a third-person shmup. How does it work? You point and shoot. Specifically, you find wherever the game decided to plop the crosshairs, poke it with your finger/mouse pointer, and drag over enemies until they die. Simple, right?

Except you have to also tell your girls to take cover if there's big attacks- the cover itself not being invincible of course- and also there's superpowers/skills, ranging from a rather ineffectual buff to A FREAKIN CARPET BOMB OR RAILGUN SHOT. The big deal with skills is they're ranked I, II, and III: chaining them in sequence puts your girls in "Full Burst" where they focus fire and do more damage or something.

Sound a bit too complicated? Well, you can just click two buttons on the top left for "automatic shooting" and "automatic skill use", and then just watch the girls go to town shooting random enemies because they have the attention span of a kitten... WHICH IS BAD because there are some maps where you have to kill enemies occupying a point or before they reach the right side of the screen, and the AI seems to want to prioritize newly-spawned enemies rather than those that are about to blow your objective sky-high. Having to take control even during the auto-shooting to counter this issue defeats the purpose of having the option.

A lot of the combat scenarios also, despite having a noted "Power score" require far more than that set score to defeat because of enemies that both heal and up defense on nearby units (sometimes making you deal no damage at all when they group up), meaning every fight basically boils down to how much DPS you can fart out as opposed to the Power score meaning anything. You basically won't have a safe win unless your Power score is over 1000 above the fight score.

The worst part is how apparently the damage you can deal is affected by framerate. Yes, the framerate. If you can run the game at 60 FPS, you do the most damage. Also turning off Auto-Aim lets you do more damage because the "auto-aim" actually waggles far too much to be effective at its job. So if your game runs at low FPS and you can't aim well on your own, then you're just out of luck I guess.

While there are "ranges" for various guns and "elements" for weakness I guess, they tend to be a non-factor in most cases as the only real people who have trouble with range are shotguns and SMGs. It's a lot of mechanics that seem cool but are ultimately second-hand and basically only give you an inch of breathing room.

Oh, and I forgot to mention this: EVERY BATTLE IS TIMED. You have the span of A MINUTE AND A HALF to end most fights, Three minutes for boss/big fights. THIS IS WHERE THE "DPS CHECK" COMMENT IS ABSOLUTELY CORRECT. It's bad enough the game has enemy setups that often require a whole minute to kill even with high-level characters.

Also telling the girls to take cover during an attack can be pointless as most huge-hitting attacks actually BYPASS COVER, so it's better to just tank damage and keep the girls shooting so you don't run out of time. Kind of makes the cover part of the gameplay pointless.

This went on a bit longer than I anticipated, but all-in-all the gameplay is very hampered by a bunch of ideas that are executed very poorly. While it functions, it would be hard for it not to since it's literally just "point at thing, go boom", but the way it functions makes it clear it's held together by duct tape and glue.

Music: Forgettable/10

This one's brief. The music also waffles between "high school shojo" and "Transformers Devastation" with no real thematic connection between the two. It's the old-school "Korean MMO" style of music to make something catchy but not good for menu stuff, and then they try to be "metal" with combat music things. It's not at all memorable, and I often mute the music just to listen to the fight music from Devastation instead because it just sounds better.

Character Designs: Gacha, more like "Gotcha beech"/10

It's a gacha. If anything, the budget goes into the designs. So there's something for everyone, I guess. But let's judge based on practicality of outfits. The litmus test puts this one at almost Artery Gear levels of impracticality, but I feel like it's expounded by the Live2D wanting to put excessive jiggle on anything remotely containing fat.

Then you have characters in normal clothing, like the motorcycle-riding shotgun girl who dresses like a biker chick with a shotgun. Enough said. I've noticed a particular obsession with microskirts, but for the jello butt advertisements, that's no surprise. And there's also petite and loli characters, also no surprise.

So... It has some interesting designs, but a lot of them are pretty stupid in what's missing, some are literally just in underwear/sleepwear, and some defy the laws of physics by not only having giant tits but having them somehow remain in their shirts despite the fact that they should have popped out hours ago due to the lack of bra.

Economy: Awful/10

So how do you earn money and stuff? The GFL/BattleSpace way: hourly gain. Except you have to pick it up regularly because the place's temporary storage is limited to 12-hours-worth. Better log in twice a day.

So what happens is completing story fights basically adds ticks to your resource gathering level, which increases the rate at which you get money, level-up mats, and equipment per minute. It's referred to as "Outpost Defense" because the girls get it from defending your home base. While you can also get money and mats from fighting story fights, it's basically just a tiny bonus.

That would be fine if not for the fact that battles DO NOT GIVE EXPERIENCE. That's right. The girls don't learn shit from actual combat, only from feeding them level-up mats. This would be fine if the amount needed for level-up didn't become excessively huge when reaching level 60 and beyond.

So where do you grind for stuff in the meantime? Nowhere. Yep, nowhere. This is the first game I've seen where your sortie limit isn't through stamina or resources but LEVEL. You're level-gated in terms of progression, and even then the normal level cap is 80 unless you get copies of girls, meaning your shiny SSRs are gimped unless you roll (and despite what you think of the rates, the cost is excessive).

While some folks may think lacking grind is a good thing because it generates pacing, it actually hampers it because it makes it possible to clear a bunch of chapters at once and then rapidly diminishes the progress you can make. And with its barebones story, you're likely to forget what happened last time unless you actually sit and wait days on end to gather level-up mats to be ready. Speaking of story...

Story: Barely there/10

Depresso espresso. It's the God Eater thing but also the robots used to fight the impending apocalyptic force are discriminated against because they're not human. People live underground to avoid the Araga-- I mean Raptures while the T-Doll-- Er, Nikkes fight on the surface for humanity. The commanders that lead them are taught they're heroes for humanity but are treated equally like cannon fodder.

Luckily your character is a rookie commander who treats the Nikkes like human beings, which means you're automatically the best commander despite knowing nothing about how to do your job. You are the plot-armor protagonist archetype, basically, and you win against impossible odds.

This wouldn't be particularly bad if it wasn't for the fact that the game then starts to play at an intrigue of you being unique somehow late in the story, but it feels like another of those cheap hooks to keep you invested. Especially when the main story jumps around and has things happening basically for the sake of happening to make bad things happen later.

The overall structure of the story seems to just follow an "add it on" progression rather than having a concrete background and layout for how the story will go. A lot of empty intrigue and big people in background scenes going "Hmm, fascinating, let's keep watching." It's boring and poorly executed.

Overall: Mediocre/10

The game just... Exists. It's not by any means good, but nothing about it is especially bad. It borrows a lot from other games, it generates over-emotional scenes to keep people invested, and the gameplay itself is VERY unpolished. Whether or not any of these gets fixed later on, it won't change that NIKKE itself is just bland. It just exists to sell anime ass and run off horny, it seems.

That might be fine for some people, but the lack of substance to any part of the game just makes it so forgettable.

[transformatives]

Blogging BookTok

Do you know what I mean when I say “Forbidden romance, Enemies-To-Lovers, Golden Retriever Boy x Black Cat Girl, Mafia Husband, Touch-Her-You-Die, 5 Chili Peppers Book”? If you do, then you’ve probably spent some time on the bookish side of TikTok, known synonymously as “BookTok”. But if you don’t, then you’re probably wondering what these phrases have in common, and after knowing that it has something to do with reading, then you’re probably also wondering what the actual plot of this book is. 

This way of talking about a book is one of the most popular ways of advertising on BookTok, when a fan of a book will describe a story through its use of tropes, cliches, and sexual content. In this context, “5 Chili Peppers” equals high sexual content, which represents another form of self censorship on TikTok where users replace words like “sexual content” with “chili peppers” in order to supposedly bypass shadow banning. There is not yet strong evidence that this actually works, which results in an interesting soup of synonyms for adult terminology. If users are actually shadow banned for directly speaking about adult content, then BookTok is right for using the spice scale, as it is chock-full of adult content. 

One of the main criticisms of BookTok is their prioritization of sexual content in their favorite books. If you scroll on the hashtag, you’ll find that a large percentage of the videos made include spice ratings or readers raving about who’s the hottest “book boyfriend”. Like any other online fandom, BookTok has a variety of perspectives, but time and time again it seems that only the sexual aspects are focused on by external viewers. I’d like to make the argument that this is both another example of society’s distaste for women expressing their sexualities. 

People will often describe BookTok as if women reading erotica and discussing it with their peers is a new phenomenon, rather than a practice going back to ancient times. Think of all the jokes in media about middle-aged women writing erotica in their free time (shout out to Ms. Perky from 10 Things I Hate About You!) or your aunt’s collection of trashy paperbacks with titles like “The Devil’s Gift”. Cultural studies scholar Janice Radway writes about this in her book “Reading the Romance”, in which she interviews romance book readers in a 1980s Midwestern town and provides her own social theories for why women read romance novels and why they prefer certain tropes. Radway writes that, “Romance reading…constitutes a temporary ‘declaration of independence’ from the social roles of wife and mother. By placing the barrier of the book between themselves and their families, these women reserve a special space and time for themselves alone.” In a world where women are expected to be the passive object of sexual attention but incapable of their own desires, having a safe place to explore sexuality and discuss with other women is a necessity. Open discussion, especially in online platforms such as TikTok, normalizes such things. In addition to that, the simplistic writing style of many romance novels makes it easily accessible, especially to people seeking escape from their regular lives as simply wives and mothers. 

However, this does not exempt BookTok from criticism. Although BookTok can be a good place for women to discuss their favorite novels and express themselves, there is something to be said about the homogeneity of BookTok novels. These books often prioritize sexual context. This is not a bad thing, but some critics have raised concerns about younger audiences being exposed to a large amount of adult content packaged in bright pastel covers. The trend of erotica leans to more unrealistic scenarios, with a particular penchant for tropes that blur the lines of consent and safety. Some books even forgo consent overall. One that you’ll find on a lot of Barnes and Noble “BookTok” tables is “Haunting Adeline”, a book where a man stalks and repeatedly sexually assaults a woman (despite the fact that he apparently runs an underground organization that aims to end human trafficking). This, according to book fans, could be forgiven if only the writing wasn’t terrible. A top Goodreads review reads, “I've always defended writing in the contemporary romance genre….But I've probably never read a book with worse writing than this.” In this we can see the main issue, which is not that popular BookTok books address mature content, but rather that they often handle it poorly and fans don’t want to engage with the content constructively. 

There is nothing wrong with escapism, but too often it goes hand in hand with a defensive stance that separates more than it unites. Minorities have spoken out about the lack of diversity in what BookTok promotes, where every new hot novel is about a quirky white woman with spunk falling in love with a stoic, tall, black-haired white man (shout out Ali Hazelwood). Cliqueness is another issue plaguing BookTok, one that is unfortunately racially charged at times. There’s a stubbornness within BookTok fans. Some people will even take the stance that any criticism against the romance genre is anti feminist, without realizing the irony in such a statement. 

Such discourse (or lack thereof) is indicative of a wider movement of anti intellectualism in recent media consumption. It seems that there are only two ways to interact with pieces of media. One way is to point to any problematic element within it and deem it irredeemable, regardless of if it is included to serve a narrative purpose. The other way is to decide that you love it and will defend it to the end of the earth without budging ever. Both approaches are a detriment to facilitating actual, in depth, critical discussion about media. Online spaces such as BookTok can be a tool to engage in these conversations about sexuality and gender, but only if people are willing to discuss, rather than just scream their opinions into the void. 

[universalinfo]

Engaging Online Veterinary Courses: The Art of Audience Connection

In the fast-paced world of online education, captivating your audience is more crucial than ever, especially in specialized fields like veterinary medicine. In this guide, we'll explore key strategies to ensure your online veterinary courses are not just informative, but also engaging and memorable. 

Whether you're an educator, a professional in the animal health sector, or someone passionate about veterinary science, these tips will help you transform your digital classroom into an oasis of learning and interaction. Let’s take a look at them.

creating compelling content: making learning fun and effective

Creating content for online veterinary courses that's not only informative but also fun, can seem like a tall order. But it's all about connecting with your audience. 

Start by asking yourself, "What would make this topic interesting to someone learning about it for the first time?" Use storytelling to make the material come alive. For instance, instead of just explaining a medical procedure, share a story about how it was used to save a pet's life. This approach makes the content more relatable and memorable.

Visuals are your best friend. A picture is worth a thousand words, right? Use diagrams, charts, and photos to explain complex concepts. These visual elements can make challenging topics much easier to grasp. Plus, they add a splash of color and interest to your course materials.

Keep it simple and straight to the point. Long, complicated sentences can be confusing. Break down complex ideas into short, easy-to-understand points. This way, your students won't feel overwhelmed, and they'll be more likely to stay engaged and interested.

interactive learning techniques: making every lesson a two-way street

Interactive learning is like adding a dash of spice to a dish: it makes everything more exciting. In the context of online veterinary courses, this means creating opportunities for students to actively participate rather than just passively listen. 

How do you do this? Start with quizzes. But make them fun! Use colorful images, interesting questions, and even throw in some humorous options. This not only tests their knowledge but also makes learning enjoyable.

Discussion forums are like the virtual coffee shops of your course. They provide a place for students to chat, share ideas, and ask questions. Encourage them to post pictures, maybe of their pets or something interesting they've found related to the course. This creates a sense of community and makes the learning experience more personal and engaging.

Case studies are another fantastic tool. Present real-life scenarios and ask students how they would handle them. This not only makes them think critically but also prepares them for real-world situations they might face in their veterinary careers. For more details visit us at https://www.trimblegroup.io/.

utilizing technology to your advantage: embracing the digital age

In today's world, technology is everywhere, and it can be a powerful ally in making online veterinary courses more engaging. Embrace the latest tech trends to keep your course exciting and up-to-date. 

For instance, virtual reality (VR) can transport students into a virtual clinic, where they can practice procedures in a safe and controlled environment. Imagine the thrill of performing a virtual surgery.

Augmented reality (AR) can turn a simple textbook diagram into a 3D model that students can explore from all angles. This not only makes learning more interactive but also helps students visualize and understand complex anatomical structures.

And let's not forget about the power of mobile learning. By making your courses accessible on smartphones and tablets, students can learn on the go, whenever they have a few spare minutes. This flexibility is a huge advantage in today's busy world.

By focusing on these areas, we can make online veterinary courses more than just educational; they become a dynamic, interactive, and enjoyable journey into the world of veterinary science.

personalization is key: tailoring learning to each student

Personalizing your online veterinary courses is like giving each student a learning path designed just for them. Start by offering a variety of materials: videos for those who learn best visually, podcasts for auditory learners, and interactive simulations for hands-on learners. This variety ensures that every student finds something that resonates with them.

But personalization doesn't stop there. It’s about understanding each student's interests and career goals. For instance, if a student is particularly interested in exotic animals, provide additional resources or case studies in that area. This not only keeps the content relevant but also shows the students that you care about their individual learning journey.

Also, consider different learning paces. Some students grasp concepts quickly, while others may need more time. By offering self-paced modules alongside scheduled live sessions, you cater to both types of learners, ensuring no one feels left behind or unchallenged.

consistent engagement and feedback: keeping the momentum going

Consistent engagement is like keeping the flame alive in a long-distance relationship. Regular communication is key. Send out weekly newsletters, host live Q&A sessions, and be active in discussion forums. This constant presence makes students feel supported and part of a learning community.

Feedback is the breakfast of champions, and in online veterinary courses, it’s no different. Provide timely and constructive feedback on assignments and quizzes. This not only helps students understand where they stand but also encourages them to keep improving. Peer-to-peer feedback is also valuable; it allows students to learn from each other and view different perspectives.

Remember, engagement is a two-way street. Encourage students to give feedback about the course. This shows that you value their opinions and are committed to improving the learning experience.

trimble group: elevating veterinary education to new heights

At Trimble Group, we specialize in transforming online veterinary courses into engaging, memorable experiences. We believe that learning about animal health can and should be fascinating. 

Our approach is unique. We combine our deep understanding of veterinary science with our expertise in creative storytelling. This means turning complex concepts into visually stunning, easy-to-understand content.

Our team, a blend of veteran veterinarians and creative wizards, is dedicated to making each course not just a learning experience but a journey into the world of animal health. We take pride in our ability to create high-quality visuals and interactive content that captivates and educates.

By partnering with Trimble Group, you're not just getting a service; you're getting a team that's passionate about animal health and committed to advancing the industry through education. We believe in creativity, innovation, and quality, and these values are reflected in every course we enhance. Let us help you make your online veterinary courses not just informative but truly unforgettable.

conclusion

Transforming online veterinary courses into a vibrant and engaging learning experience is not just our goal at Trimble Group, it's our passion. By blending our deep veterinary knowledge with innovative storytelling and high-quality visuals, we're committed to making every course not just informative, but a captivating journey into animal health. 

Join us in revolutionizing veterinary education, where every lesson is an adventure, every topic a discovery, and every student's passion for animal health is ignited and nurtured. 

Read More: Online Animal Cources

[westoverlaw22]

What Happens At A Divorce Mediation Session And How Long Does Divorce Mediation Take?

Both events are encouraged to seek the advice of unbiased and separate legal counsel at any time during the mediation course of with regard to their individual legal rights and duties. If a party consults with or retains counsel during the mediation process, this reality shall be disclosed to the other celebration and to the mediator. Through mediation there is a larger likelihood of conflict resolution, which means you come to an settlement you can live with as an alternative of the courts deciding for you. The stress that you could be expertise in court docket, and the residual effects on your home life, is well price the time and potential constructive outcome that mediation provides. Many states now require divorcing couples to make use of some type of different dispute decision previous to trial. They know precisely the place there might be settlement and disagreement, what the issues are, what each must prevail, and now they are prepared for the mediation.

However not all divorces are created equal, because of divorce mediation. In mediation proceedings, each events are inspired to take part in negotiations and the choice making process. This places the control with the individuals getting a divorce, not the attorneys and judge. We compare divorce mediation attorney these and different key traits and differences between divorce litigation and mediation and choose a transparent winner. The marital settlement settlement is an agreement reached by way of divorce mediation or by the events themselves.

They will take appreciable time to resolve child custody and visitation, property division, spousal upkeep, and so forth. Of course, every little thing is context dependent, and so there are some advanced circumstances which could be resolved swiftly. There is not any standard or “average” size of time for mediation; some couples require solely a single session to achieve an agreement. Others need a number of classes after which realize that they won’t have the flexibility to reach a consensus in any respect. Carmina K. Tessitore makes a speciality of family law and complicated civil litigation.

A collaborative divorce may be very useful for couples with unique financial situations, young youngsters, or a want to keep their matter personal. Mediation is an “alternative dispute resolution” methodology known as an ADR. Trained professionals referred to as mediators to resolve disputes exterior the courtroom. Rather than a possibly contentious legal continuing, spouses agree to satisfy with a mediator to debate their differences.

We will attempt to breakdown the fee structure in a bit of element within the subsequent section. Simply put, mediation is normally the significantly better option in comparison with litigation from a financial perspective. If you don’t acquire your divorce mediation lawyer own non-public attorney, then the first value is the mediator’s hourly payment. Expectedly, the court will not provide events with a lawyer routinely, and so events have to pay out-of-pocket for a lawyer during mediation.

If you would possibly be paying or receiving child help, it is probably that you've questions shared by many people in your scenario. Whether you comply with pay or obtain baby assist, or if the court docket imposes child help to be paid by you or to you for your children, it's important that you have an... Carolyn Hand is a passionate and experienced litigator specializing in family law.

But what if the celebration not compromising came in with a reasonable offer that was more than fair? For this purpose, you better start off asking for more than you would possibly be keen to simply accept. I like to help my clients in making mediation divorce ready a dream settlement, that means its greater than they would ever expect to get, however it's what they actually need. Then we prioritize the problems for our side and rank what we believe the opposite sides priorities are.

As we'll talk about in-depth, mediation can be an effective way to resolve disputes in a extra relaxed ambiance; what’s extra, mediation could be a cost-beneficial process compared to litigation as well. As a impartial get together, the mediator asks questions aimed at defining the concerns underneath the positions staked out. You can also be stunned at how civilized your partner’s conduct is with the third celebration divorce mediation mediator present, compared to interactions outside of the mediation periods. There is all the time a chance, truly encouragement, to seek the advice of with counsel or other consultants between periods and to deliver that data to the subsequent session. There are additionally lots of of books and articles on kids and divorce, authorized rights, and monetary issues.

Some divorce instances at least will resolve a few of your issues by way of mediation. So, even when you don't settle every concern, settling some issues helps reduce your overall prices and the time it takes to strive a case before the courtroom. Divorce is a extremely emotional and annoying experience for most individuals. Having a strong divorce attorney in your corner might help ensure that you and your children walk away from this course of with the best opportunities available for future success and happiness. The lawyer can be present during the complete process; if a celebration needs, she or he can interact almost totally with his or her lawyer, rather than the mediator.

[overlooked-gems]

A Look At Stuff You Probably Never Heard Of: Helltaker: Second Circle

Valentine’s is right around the corner, so what better way to celebrate than with a game about your harem of demon girls (and one angel). And no, this is not an official sequel to Helltaker. We’ll take into that later. Today, we’re taking a look at... Helltaker: Second Circle!

Helltaker: Second Circle, often shortened to just “Second Circle” is a fanmade sequel to the Helltaker game by Łukasz “vanripper” Piskorz. Second Circle is developed by Team 133, being played in the style of a visual novel, rather than an action-puzzle game like the original. The game that is currently out is essentially a demo that’s being updated somewhat regularly.

Taking place a little over a year after the events of the original game, Lucifer is unsatisfied that the Helltaker is content with just letting attractive demon girls (and one angel girl) living in his house, not doing anything. She urges the “Taker” to spend time with the girls.

Afterwards, the player is given the chance to choose between any of the girls (except Lucifer). Each girl is given their own scenario. They’re all considered dates, but it’d more accurate to refer to them as casual outings; like going to the park with Cerberus, going to the gym with Justice, taking Azazel to a museum to work on her thesis of categorizing everything in existing and across different realms (it makes sense in context), or just playing a game with Malina. Only after spending time with each of the girls does Lucifer’s event become available. After spending time with Lucifer, more outings with the other girls become available.

As you can tell, this characters all have entirely new and original artwork to help compliment the visual novel style with the art style, dialogue, and a few other things trying to match Vanripper’s game as close as possible, but there are a few things that stand out. For instance, the backgrounds are clearly not in the Helltaker style, though it’s unknown if this is a purposeful choice or something else. And when the Taker is getting a special coffee grinder out for Pandemonica, the music from Legend of Zelda when getting an item from a chest plays.

For the second time this year, it’s time for the Final Recommendation Never Let Go Of It||Get It||Hold Onto It||Try It||Consider It||Stay Away From It

As stated before, this is a fanmade sequel with a completely different gameplay style. As a visual novel, you can only progress the story and make a few choices that don’t affect the story much. And also as stated before, this is a demo, so there isn’t a whole lot to the game. However, it’s being updated every now and again. I remember when I first played the game, it was just one round, a single date with each girl. But the most recent (at the time of making this post), there are three dates with each girl, new CG images, character art (with some being animated), and even new demons. And obviously, the girls have different clothes from their usual snazzy suits.

And speaking of new demons, Second Circle has a few new demons original to this game; Abaddon the Sloth Demon, Mammon the Greed Demon, Belphegor the Glutton Demon, and Sathanas the Wrath Demon.

And while the game is fanmade, it does give insight into the characters and the world of Helltaker. But, since it’s fanmade and Vanripper didn’t work on this, these insights are not to be considered canon. But they’re still rather interesting. Like Azazel feeling like she has a family within the Helltaker house, Cerberus protecting the Helltaker from a mugger, Lucifer improving Hell after overthrowing the previous ruler (and the Skeletons arranging themselves in annoying puzzles to impeded intruders and going on strike if they don’t get their milk), or even just a friendly hangout with Pandemonica.

It might also interest you guys to know that Vanripper is aware of this game, gave the group his blessing, and even drew Belphegor during his Demontober 2021, where he would draw a demon each day from the first to the 31st. And as a brief aside, for Pandemonica’s first date, you two go to a small cafe owned by an old man that’s pretty friendly with Pandemonica. This man, and the cafe as a whole, is a reference to Vanripper’s comic, seen here.

And before I end this, I want to mention something. In the opening scenario, Lucifer asks the Helltaker to get rid of the flies in the kitchen. Clicking on the flies rather than progressing as you would normally do will trigger a scenario with Beelzebub. However, this also skips Lucifer telling the Helltaker to spend more time with the girls.

All-in-all, I say check it. It’s a cute game and you can download it for free at itch.io, seen here. That being said, you can pay them if you want to or donate to their Patreon. And with that, I’ll see you guys next month!

[the-lone-witch-and-secret-room]

So, i'm seeing people saying that Amity may sabotage Luz's attempts to get home, judging by the episode's title Yesterday's lie. What are your thoughts?

This post just about sums it up. Amity isn’t even mentioned in the episode synopsis, and it’s not like Luz is planning to leave for good. I feel like people are jumping the gun on that one.

I don’t think we should be taking the “yesterday” in that statement so literally. I don’t actually think it’s about what happened the day before (we don’t even have confirmation that Eclipse Lake takes place a day before this episode). It seems way more likely that it’s just referring to something that just in general happened in the past. On that note, keep in mind, they have to keep the titles in line with the message that the episodes spell out. There’s only so many words that begin with Y and would make sense in this context.

(Also nobody would title an episode “that lie from three months ago”, lol)

And consider: we’ve had episode titles that were intentionally misleading before. “The Intruder” was meant to trick the viewers into thinking someone actually broke into the house, rather than the monster being cursed Eda.

Rather than Amity lying to Luz, there’s a way more obvious ongoing lie related to Luz in the show that I’m pretty sure this is referring to. It’s how she’s been lying to her mom about what she’s up to. Since Camila is in the trailers for the season 1A promo, I feel like the episode is about Camila finding out the truth/Luz being forced to come clean to her once she’s stepped back through the portal into her world. That’s what Luz isn’t sure she’s ready for.

Also I feel like the whole “Amity tries to prevent Luz from going home”-idea is kind of stupid to begin with? Amity was in love with Luz before the portal blew up. We didn’t see her attempting to destroy the portal back then.

Like guys this girl is fourteen, not some manipulative evil mastermind??? I like angst as much as the next person but like… that’s taking it a bit far. Amity attempting to force Luz to stay in the Boiling Isles would cause a major falling out, and not one they could just bounce back from. We’re likely only getting this one season and then three 40 minute specials. That’s not enough time to cover Luz and Amity trying to repair their relationship after a mess like this and everything else that’s been set up to happen.

There’s also another reason why I don’t think this title is referring to Amity, and that’s how Amity in general has been portrayed so far. She’s been raised to think of love as something conditional. Something you need to earn and something you lose if you don’t do what that person wants—which is why she tries so hard to prove herself to her parents (something she’s now finally starting to break out of). She is used to putting other people’s wishes before her own when she seeks their approval.

Amity loves Luz. And I think more than anything, she wants Luz to be happy. She wants to be with her, but she’s not going to force Luz to stay if that’s not what Luz wishes to do. Amity has been forced to do a whole bunch of things throughout her life by people that supposedly love her, and I just can’t see her doing the same thing to Luz when she’s been through that kind of manipulation a million times over and knows exactly what it feels like.

If she manipulates Luz like that and Luz catches her, she’d also risk losing her for good, and Amity doesn’t take risks that big easily. She’s used to having to give 120% because even 110% aren’t enough for her parents, and if there’s the ghost of a chance she could fail, she doesn’t even try. Up until she meets Luz, she doesn’t do anything against her parents wishes, despite knowing how much the twins get away with, because there’s a chance that she wouldn’t get away with it. She’s afraid of rejection, and since there’s a chance Luz could say no to her, she doesn’t ask her out. She’s also lost the most important person in her life (Willow) through her own actions once before, and I just cannot see her risking that again.

Amity is starting to take more risks now, because Luz inspires her to, but she’s changing as a person way beyond “she’s willing to take more risks”.

Screwing other people over to get what she wants (which is very much something she probably internalized considering the household she grew up in) is something Amity would’ve done before she met Luz, before Luz inspired her to be better. She cut Willow off because her parents asked her to. She used to tattle on the twins all the time because she wanted her parents’ approval. She burned Willow’s photo so people wouldn’t find out they were friends, even if it meant hurting Willow in the progress.

She did everything she could so her parents would be proud of her, so they would love her, even if it meant hurting others.

And Luz slowly changed everything. Luz, who is reckless, and selfless, and always stands up for the people she cares about, even when it means putting herself in harm’s way in the progress. Luz, who helped Amity fix things with Willow. Luz and her current friends inspire Amity to be a better person. “They’re nice to each other. They listen to each other. They make me think about the kind of person I really want to be”, to directly quote Escaping Expulsion. And that person isn’t the kind of manipulator her parents are, who will stop at nothing to get what they want, even if people get hurt in the progress.

That person is selfless, and does the right thing, no matter what. She made her first step towards that in Understanding Willow, when she fixes her mistake and faces her past misdeeds in the progress, even if it’s hard, even if she doesn’t want to, because it’s the right thing to do. Because she owes it to Willow, and she owes her an apology. In Wing it like Witches, she follows through on her promise to stand up for Willow and breaks ties with her old friends, even if her parents will definitely hear of that. Even at the risk of painting a target on her back for Boscha, Skara and their friends. Heck, she puts herself in harm’s way in the literal sense to give Luz a chance to win the game.

And in Escaping Expulsion, she even risks angering her parents to help Luz and her friends. The parental approval that she’s worked for for so hard for so many years is at stake, and she chooses to do risk everything to do the right thing, to help her friends. She chooses the people who treat her right, who make her happy.

Her powerful speech would be meaningless if Amity would then turn around and sabotage Luz. It says a ton about how much Luz trusts Amity that she trusts Amity to get something portal-related for her in Eclipse Lake, and I just cannot see Amity betraying that trust. It’s possible that Amity struggles with the thought of Luz going home in that episode, but I cannot see her doing anything to sabotage something that’s this important to Luz. That would be a huge disservice to her character in my opinion.

Seeing that episode title and going “this means Amity is lying to Luz and sabotaging her for her own selfish desires” is to completely ignore all of Amity’s character development. Amity isn’t that person anymore. She’s trying really hard to be better. If she were to sabotage Luz’s attempts at going home, and choosing that over open communication, it would be a huge step back for her.

Honestly, it feels more likely that Amity ends up choosing to openly communicate her feelings, which would be a huge, huge thing for her. Maybe when they say their temporary goodbye she says something like “you better come back soon” and kisses Luz before she leaves (which would align with her allowing herself to take more risks if they’ll make her happy that we’ve seen a bunch of lately).

To circle back to the beginning, like I said, it’s very likely that Yesteday’s Lie focuses on Luz’s relationship with her mom, and Luz freaking out at the prospect of telling her everything. How much of a role her friends and Amity play in it is very up in the air, even if as mentioned I could see this scenario leading into a confession scene.

[caffeinatedseri]

Dazai and No Longer Human’s Yozo

It’s no secret that BSD’s Dazai draws heavily from his real life counterpart, especially from his semi-autobiographical work: No Longer Human. To preface, No Longer Human is written from the perspective of the main character Yozo, with the book itself being a documentation of Yozo’s notebooks (essentially his journals) throughout his life. 

As you progress through the novel, it becomes increasingly clear that Yozo lives an extremely two-sided life; his foolish personality acts as a facade to others in attempts to hide the darker nature within him. 

Dazai shares that obvious similarity with Yozo, but Dazai is characterized in a somewhat vague and mysterious way that leaves a lot of his inner thoughts up to interpretation and inferences. Thus, I’ll be going through some of my favorite quotes from No Longer Human and analyzing Dazai’s character through his similarities to Yozo.

(For the sake of readability, excerpts from No Longer Human will be in pictures, and quotes from the light novel will be in regular block quotes).

Dazai and Yozo’s Participation in Clownery

To start off, Dazai noticeably participates in the same “clowning” as Yozo, which in particular stands out with PM Dazai.

““How did your leg get hurt?” I pointed to the bandages, thinking that it must be the result of some violent fight. “I was reading a book titled ‘How to Prevent Accidental Injuries’ while walking when I accidentally fell into a ditch.” I wasn’t expecting such an abnormal response.” — LN 2, Osamu Dazai and the Dark Era (Oda’s POV)

This is pretty standard Dazai behavior, but the interesting part is how Yozo specifically used the word “deceiving.” If we were to assume Yozo’s true thoughts are Dazai’s as well, then it would imply that Dazai feels as if he’s manipulating people with his absurd claims (such as the above). However, in actuality, his clownish behaviors sound more like a joke, or some type of self-deflection, rather than an attempt to manipulate people. (Yozo also states that he would often incriminate himself by overexaggerating certain things, but I don’t think Dazai does that).

The second statement Yozo makes implies that he doesn’t care about ethics, morality, or the supposed “right way” of living life that’s described as “righteousness.”

Yozo’s statement on “righteousness” parallels Dazai’s in Dark Era, but Dazai’s statement carries a slightly different sentiment. Rather than being indifferent to the likes of morality, Dazai says that he’s “hated” by the concept of morality. 

I’ll be speculating a bit here → It’s heavily implied that Dazai had some sort of dark past that led him to joining the mafia, since he was already suicidal prior to doing so. This suggests that something affected his life so drastically to the point where he could no longer trust in such things as “righteousness,” because righteousness has wronged him in the past.

First, Yozo expresses his fear of people discovering his true nature under the mask of clownery, which would then lead to them pestering him for further inquiry. However, his real fear is that people would mistake his true nature as another part of his typical clownery.

More so than before, this attitude reminds me more of Dazai in the agency, rather than him in the mafia. Even though Dazai danced around darker topics in his conversations with Oda, he was still able to talk about them without much conflict. However, in the agency, Dazai doesn’t talk much about himself or any of his personal issues at all. 

Although this scene has comedic overtones, it’s interesting to see that no one would help Dazai if he was actually dying. Still, it could be argued that the other agency members knew it was just Dazai’s regular antics. (or that Dazai wouldn’t die in the first place). 

This scenario repeats itself another time when Dazai gets kidnapped by the mafia, and the other agency members kind of just brush it aside. As much as they may trust Dazai to take care of himself (which I’m sure he can do), it’s worrying that the other members may not be open to Dazai’s possible attempts at reaching out for help, if he were ever to make one. 

In LN 4, 55 Minutes, Atsushi addresses this issue by asking Dazai why he wants to kill himself, but the answer is left open-ended, with Atsushi himself not remembering the answer (or if Dazai even did answer). You could interpret Dazai’s change from his time in the PM as an improvement of his mental state — which I have no doubt that has happened — but Dazai needs to face his issues head-on if he truly wanted to reconcile with his past.

“Perhaps someone should persistently tie Dazai up, open the lid over his chest and stuff the head of a vacuum cleaner in. They have to let Dazai, who should be screaming in pain and resisting, settle down. Following which, the difficult things in his heart must all be dragged out under the sun and stepped on mercilessly.“ — LN 2, Osamu Dazai and the Dark Era

Oda, the man who understood Dazai more than anyone else could at the time, even specifically stated that the pain in Dazai’s heart must be forcefully dragged out, because he knew that this would ultimately be the most beneficial for Dazai’s sanity.

Throughout No Longer Human, Yozo is often misunderstood by others, or other people simply don’t care about him.

When Dazai goes to visit Oda’s grave in Dead Apple, Atsushi finds him and assumes that he’s visiting the grave of someone important to him, as an act of respect or remembrance, something of the sort. However, Dazai makes the automatic assumption that his “clownish words of deceit” (as stated by Yozo) will always be prioritized over the truth, which is why he chooses to brush off his actions as a joke. 

Although I made the point earlier that the agency members don’t give Dazai opportunities to open up about himself, Atsushi is notably different, similarly to Oda, because he’s able to take Dazai seriously and persist even through his antics. 

Atsushi takes Dazai’s act of visiting a grave seriously, even when Dazai plays it off, because he knows Dazai is a person just like anyone else. This understanding between them leads to Dazai telling Atsushi about Oda, thereby allowing Dazai to divulge a crucial part of his past.

Dazai and Yozo’s Friendships

Similarly to Yozo, Dazai’s attempt at “disentangling” himself from these relationships only serves to wear him out in the end. However, they also slightly differ in a way: Yozo is unable to form any friendships for his whole life, but Dazai had Oda. I would argue that Oda was Dazai’s only friend, mostly because of this quote:

“Odasaku understood him far beyond what Dazai had ever thought. He had already reached close to his heart, the place near the center of his heart. Before this, Dazai had never noticed there was someone who understood him so well. For the first time in his life, Dazai wanted to know something from the depths of his heart.” — LN 2, “Osamu Dazai and the Dark Era”

Oda was special to Dazai because Oda was able to understand him — maybe even more than Dazai could understand himself — which is why Oda is the only person that Dazai asks for advice from. 

However, Dazai does the same thing as Yozo when he “plays the clown” as a form of self-protection from such valuable friendships. (which is probably preventing him from becoming closer to the rest of the agency).

“Things that we don’t want to lose will definitely be lost. Now that it has come to this, I have no more feelings anymore. Things worth pursuing will always disappear the moment before you get them. Nothing is worth prolonging a painful life to pursue.” — LN 2, “Osamu Dazai and the Dark Era”

Interestingly enough, Dazai says this when Ango is revealed to be a spy — before Oda dies. If Dazai was in this state of distress from Ango’s betrayal, you could only imagine how devastating Oda’s death was. 

Dazai speaks as if he’s speaking from experience, which suggests that he’s faced a similar loss in the past. Despite this implied experience, he still became friends with Oda (and Ango to an extent), fully knowing that it would only bring him pain in the end. Dazai's statement here acts more as a front that makes him sound cold and detached from the situation, only to hide how he truly feels about losing one of his only friends. 

To give some context to this passage, Yozo’s partner, Yoshiko, had been sexually assaulted by a coworker, of which Yozo attributes the cause to her overly trusting nature. Thus, this leads to Yozo’s belief that trustfulness is inherently wrong or creates weakness.

Dazai’s hesitance to form friendships most likely stems from this same inability to trust others like Yozo, but Dazai does trust a few people, namely Chuuya, Oda, and Atsushi.

With Chuuya, there’s a different type of trust between him and Dazai. Their impeccable trust is obviously a key factor in their partnership as SKK, but there’s a certain limit with this trust. They certainly trust each other in battle, but I’d argue that this trust doesn’t extend to their personal business. 

As of now, we don’t know a lot about how SKK interacted with each other during their time in the mafia (which could change with the new LN), but I doubt PM Dazai would feel comfortable with confiding in Chuuya with anything because they (kind of) hated each other. The level of trust required for a friendship would involve a mutual understanding between two people, but Chuuya and Dazai haven’t necessarily shown us that they were able to do that.

Dazai essentially broke his trust with Chuuya by leaving the mafia on a whim, but he also intentionally antagonized himself to try to make Chuuya hate him.

This scene also has comedic overtones, but it suggests something a bit sadder about Dazai. There are possibly two motivations as to why Dazai chose to do this: (or a mix of the two)

1. Dazai didn’t want Chuuya to be incriminated as his accomplice when he became an enemy of the mafia.

2. Dazai wanted to push Chuuya away because Oda — Dazai’s most trusted friend — had just died. As a form of self-protection, Dazai broke whatever semblance of friendship he shared with Chuuya in order to prevent the same pain that came with Oda’s death. 

It’s also important to consider that trust is a 2-way street; both parties have to have the same level of trust in each other. Just like Yozo, if Dazai is unable to trust anyone, then he may have cut Chuuya off to protect him (since Chuuya may have trusted Dazai more than Dazai was able to reciprocate).

In contrast, Oda and Dazai have a level of unspoken trust that basically motivates Dazai to change his entire life. 

“Odasaku’s eyes radiate with conviction. The words are clearly said with some sort of strong basis. Is it past experience? Or perhaps someone’s suggestion? — He is trying to show Dazai the path he once walked. Dazai understands this. Dazai can trust it.“ — LN 2, “Osamu Dazai and the Dark Era”

Returning to Yozo’s question — “Is trustfulness a sin?” — Dazai answers it by showing us the strength of trust in this moment. Trust insinuates blind faith in another person, the willingness to believe someone else without logical reasoning, which makes it all the more important when PM Dazai — the genius prodigy who operates on a solely logical basis — is able to trust Oda and change his path in life. 

Atsushi is most likely the one that Dazai trusts the most in the agency, due to the aforementioned issues with the other members. However, it seems more like a budding trust that’s growing to become like Oda and Dazai, but it still requires Dazai to take that step forward to further their trust. 

Dazai and Yozo’s View of the World

In this scene, Yozo had made a decision for immediate gratification, but that choice caused him insufferable pain afterwards — supporting his belief that the world was a “place of bottomless horror.”

This parallels two of Dazai’s statements: one from Dark Era and one from Dead Apple.

“Please, take me with you. Wake me up from this rotten world of a dream. Come on, come on, come on!” — LN 2, “Osamu Dazai and the Dark Era”

(Dazai wasn’t talking about himself here, but the allusion sets up a situation where he can talk about himself indirectly — I talk about it more in my other post here)

We don’t really get a reason for why Dazai is suicidal, but from this we can infer that it’s something more complex than he makes it out to be — something like an issue deeply rooted within the world, with no easy solution. 

One could guess that this was the result of an unfortunate decision (like Yozo), or the realization that the world was simply a terrible place (possibly because no one cared for him as a kid and he had Mori as a “parental” figure instead).

Yozo expresses his lack of understanding in the compassion of human nature, but Dazai (as we know) seems to understand other people perfectly, as least enough to manipulate them.

However, this forms somewhat of a paradox: Dazai understands people so well to the point that he can’t understand them.

Dazai understands every flawed aspect of a human being — the tendency to manipulate, lie, kill, etc. — most likely because of his past as a young child. “Human beings never did teach” him the hopeful aspect of human nature  — the ability to love and cherish others.

Shibusawa in Dead Apple reflects this mindset, but take note of what Dazai says: “You wouldn’t be saying that if you actually had friends” — clearly a reflection of Dazai’s personal experience, by knowing how important friends are.

Yozo’s deathly fear of society tames itself when he comes to the realization that society is really just made up of a bunch of individuals working for their individual benefit, so he has no reason to fear society as a whole.

I don’t believe Dazai has this same fear of society, but he does reflect this individualistic mindset in the way he acts. Often enough, Dazai doesn’t tell anyone about his plans and would rather manipulate people into following such plans, even when it would be easier to cooperate. He always takes care of conflicts by himself, and by his standard.

Yozo’s fear of society possibly manifested into Dazai’s ostracization from society. More speculation here, but → My guess is that Dazai was alienated not only as a genius isolated for his intelligence, but also for his ability. There seems to be some division between regular society and ability-users’ society, but I can see Dazai being rejected by both because he’s the antithesis to all abilities. 

Regular society would either shun him like other users or attempt to exploit him for their personal gain (possibly for his intelligence AND his ability), or ability-users would see him as a threat and/or menace to their safety.

When Yozo considers a double suicide with his partner, he comes to this unsure conclusion of whether or not he actually wants to go through with it.

This reflects what Oda believes about Dazai:

“I thought you and Dazai were very similar, unable to see the value of your life, hoping for death, hence jumping into a world of violence and fighting. But that’s not the case. That guy is just a child who’s too smart. Just a crying child who’s been left alone in the darkness, a world of nothingness far emptier than the world we can see.“ — LN 2, “Osamu Dazai and the Dark Era”

At the end of the story, Gide and Oda are different from Dazai because they face an inevitable hopelessness. However, Dazai has a small spark of hope to live on that persists beyond the other two. 

This is represented in Dazai’s own statement to Oda, when Oda is set on walking to his death: “Go and rely on something, hope for something good to happen next, that something will definitely happen.” 

If anything, this sounds more like a plea to himself than to Oda, but it establishes an important point: hope is built upon the assumption that the future will treat your present desires well. Vice versa, hopelessness is built upon the expectation that the future will neglect your present desires.

It’s a bit wordy, so I’ll elaborate on. Right after Dazai says this line, they proceed to talk about their desires → Dazai wants to find a reason to live, so he joined the mafia; Oda wanted to become a novelist, so he didn’t kill anyone. 

Now, the difference between hope and hopelessness:

Oda feels hopeless because he expects that his present desire (to become a novelist) won’t be fulfilled in the future. By losing the one qualification that he felt he had to follow (not killing anyone), he no longer believes that he can become a novelist.

Dazai has hope because he assumes that his present desire (to find a reason to live) will be fulfilled in the future. He doesn’t know that for sure, but he persists onwards regardless of having full assurance or not. 

Dazai’s hope and trust in Oda brings him to where he is in the present, and takes him one step closer towards discovering his reason to live. 

[tooweirdforyou]

Being Jealous of Nami Wearing Luffy’s Straw Hat

A/N : My very first scenario oneshot. It’s a bit long, and the actual main scenario doesn’t start until a bit later. I just wanted to be detailed and give a bit of context, so it’s long... Sorry. 😅

Summary : After taking notice of the special attention Nami is getting from Luffy, allowing her to wear his special straw hat, [Name] starts to feel a little jealous.

You weren’t one to get jealous easily.

Really, you didn’t see yourself as that kind of person. You considered yourself to be pretty laid-back and not giving a damn about anything. You accepted what you had and how far you’ve come in life with the amount of work and effort you put in to get there.

So why did your chest ache so much now?

From afar was Nami laughing alongside Luffy, with the latter’s prized straw hat upon the navigator’s head. The two were smiling and making jokes, it seemed, whilst Luffy was fishing, his legs swinging over the railing and above the ocean.

You stare at the pair from up on the upper deck, leaning against the railing outside of the kitchen.

“[Name]~ my angel!~ Would you like some chamomile tea?” The chef’s voice calls from inside the kitchen rather loudly, him exiting to meet you outside on the upper deck.

Noticing your silence and staring blankly at Nami and Luffy on the main deck with pursed lips, Sanji let a softer smile place on his lips as he strides beside you, tapping your shoulder gently.

Blinking, you snap back to reality and glance beside you to see Sanji and let a weak smile fall onto your lips. “Sanji. Sorry, I didn’t hear you. Did you need something?”

Sanji didn’t say anything, simply keeping silent as he too, leaned against the railing and pulled out a cigarette, lighting it up to smoke. You watch Sanji a bit, before giving a glance back to Nami and Luffy, just as Luffy was reeling in a fish he caught, nearly falling off the ship.

“You haven’t talked to him yet, right?”

You close your eyes and let the curve of your lips tic upwards more at Sanji’s words and exhale softly beside him. “That obvious huh?” Sanji smiles as he pulls the cigarette away from his lips and huffs the smoke from his lips.

“You should say something.”

Ever since you saw Luffy willingly give his special hat to Nami on top of her head to wear, your heart ached so much that you had to find someone to talk about it with.

Who better than the love connoisseur himself?

Fortunately, Sanji was able to help you. Sure, he did cry tears at the thought of his captain capturing your heart, giving small curses to him as he did so, he did eventually calm down and explain to you that you were actually just feeling envious of Nami receiving special attention from Luffy.

Which of course, afterwards, made him proceed to curse Luffy a couple more times, sulking, and then praising Nami for being such an irresistible goddess. Which you chose to ignore.

“Yeah, if it was that easy.” You snort a bit at Sanji, shaking your head with a better smile, already feeling a bit better from just talking with him. Sanji let out a soft chuckle as well, turning his head to face you.

“Luffy’s a dumbass, so it won’t be too hard to sit him down and talk with him. Sure, he’ll be bouncing around so you’ll have to give him a hard knock on the head to make him sit still..” Laughing softly with Sanji, you were about to speak before being interrupted by a certain person’s yells.

“Sanji! Cook this Sea King for us!” Luffy shouts, pointing to the ocean where a sea king laid floating in the water, completely knocked out. Nami was beside him, holding the straw hat in her hands with a wide smile as well.

Sanji gave a small annoyed sigh but still smiled regardless, nodding. “Fine, it’s almost lunch anyways. Reel it in!” Sanji turns back to you, who was no longer smiling as bright and just watching the scene unfold below you.

“Usopp, Zoro! Help me bring this Sea King in!” Luffy shouts for his crewmates, who didn’t take long to come out and aid their captain.

Nami was now talking with Luffy and handing back the straw hat as the other two boys did the grunt work. You unknowingly frown slightly before turning away and walking off, heading down to the main deck, to get to your room. Sanji’s smile fades as he stares at your leaving figure, thinking of something to try and help you.

For now, he had to focus on prepping for lunch.

---

Everyone was currently in the kitchen, enjoying the delicious meal that Sanji had prepared with the sea king that was caught.

You didn’t take part in the activity, not quite feeling the appetite, so you used this time to relax in the bedroom and perhaps read a book. 

So, you were pretty startled when the captain suddenly called out for you, slamming the door open. “[Naaaameeee]!” 

Just as you look up, you found Luffy propelling himself right into you, knocking you both down onto the ground, with him on top. Grunting out in pain of the impact, you look up to see Luffy grinning down at you. “There you are! You missed out on all of Sanji’s food. He cooked the sea king I caught for lunch! Did you see it?”

He was peering down at you, hands beside your heads as he continued to lean down closer to you. Feeling your cheeks warming up at how close he was, you squirmed under him a bit and exhale. “Y-Yeah, I saw it, it was pretty big. I’m sure the food was delicious too.”

“Shishishishi- It was!” Luffy laughs heartily before slowly frowning. “You wouldn’t know, you didn’t come eat with us! Why?” You would push him off, but right now, you arms were stuck and trapped at your sides. “I just wasn’t hungry I guess. It’s okay though, it let you eat more, right?”

Luffy smiles widely, pulling back and slowly getting off, now sitting in front of you. “Yeah. I saved some for you though too. I didn’t want you to miss out on the delicious food.” He says, crossing his arms as he spoke. You were a bit taken back by this. Luffy, sharing and saving food?

You smile slightly and nod at Luffy, giving your gratitude. “Thank you, Luffy. I’ll remember to eat it later then, maybe we can eat together if I have a lot.” You offer, slowly sitting up straight and dusting your arms. 

The captain smiles at the offer before his lips began turning to a firm line. “Sanji said you weren’t feeling well. He said I should check up on you and talk. I noticed you’ve been quiet lately too. Is something wrong?” 

Luffy may be a dumbass and pretty reckless, but he isn’t blind. Naturally, as a captain of a ship, he had a crew to look after. He’s rather observant, so it wasn’t hard for him to notice that you’ve been different lately. 

Chewing on the inside of your cheek, you simply shook your head and sent him a small smile. “Nothing’s wrong, I’m fine.” You assure, standing up, but Luffy just tilted his head down, his hat shadowing over his eyes. He reached his hand up and immediately grabbed a hold of yours.

“Tell me, [Name].”

Hearing the tone in his voice made you widen your eyes slightly. You only heard this tone when he was extremely pissed at someone, like Arlong for hurting Nami. You pursed your lips before exhaling in defeat, sitting back down in front of him, this time, at a distance.

“As you wish, Captain.” Luffy looks up, removing his hand from yours and crosses his arms once more, tilting his head to the side this time, satisfied with your answer as he waited patiently. “So tell me what’s wrong.”

“Luffy. Do you like Nami?” Luffy furrows his brows in confusion, clearly having not expecting that, nor understanding why you would ask that. “Of course I do, she’s my friend.”

“Your straw hat is your prized possession, right?” You ask another question, this time a bit carefully and slowly, since you didn’t want to outright say what you were thinking. You close your eyes and pull your knees up to your chest as he spoke.

“That’s right. Shanks gave it to me, you know that.” Luffy raises a brow as he takes off his hat, staring at it before looking up at you. “I don’t understand what this has to-”

“You wouldn’t just give it to anyone then..So, why does Nami get to wear it?..” You mumble, looking away as you frowned once more, almost pouting. 

Though it was quiet, Luffy heard you quite easily as he suddenly became quiet.

You exhale softly, about to turn and speak again. Hearing footsteps stopped you as Luffy stood right in front of you, crouching down so he was your height and suddenly smiled warmly.

“Is that all?”

“Huh?—“

Before you could react, you felt something press against your head and look up to see Luffy, his hand pushing the straw hat onto your head so it was secure.

Luffy’s closed-eyed grin plasters across his face as he pulls his hand back so the hat rested upon your head by itself, chuckling to himself.

“I like you a lot, [Name]. I was worried that something was really wrong, that I did something to make you want to leave the crew.” Luffy says, chuckling more with joy, glad that wasn’t the case.

“But if you wanted to wear my hat, all you had to do was ask. It’s my special hat, but I trust you with it.” He says, his smile became softer as he watched your flushed cheeks warm at his words.

“Luffy, I—“

“Whenever you want to wear it, let me know. From now on, only you will get to, okay?” Luffy hums, placing his hands onto your shoulders before grinning once again.

“Wear it for a while. Shishishi! It looks great on you. Now, come on, let’s go eat some sea king!”