#bam margera x f!reader

[asskickedbygirl]

The Other Woman

Bam Margera x F!Reader & Ryan Dunn x F!Reader

Desc: You’re who Bam comes to whenever Jenn’s away, and Ryan thinks you deserve better than that.

A/n: this came to me randomly and i had to get it out… also first time writing on a laptop so format is different lol! listened to a lot of jeff buckley while writing this too

Warnings: smut (18+), angst, p in v, cheating, oral (f!receiving)

3.5k words

⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒

“Pssst. C’mere Trouble!” You whisper-shouted out to Bam’s cat from your bedroom door, attempting to lure him inside. It became routine at this point for the cat to sleep in your room, after all you were the one feeding it and emptying the litter box even if Novak claimed he did it. Eventually the black and white pet wandered lazily into your room after you rattled a plastic bag of cat treats to sweeten the deal. Almost immediately after you shut the door you heard a knock from outside, another thing that became routine...

You opened the door reluctantly to find a shirtless Bam, not that him being shirtless was out of the ordinary or anything. He wore that same look you knew all too well as he pushed the door to be more ajar, allowing Trouble to run right back out.

“Hey it took me a fucking age to get him in here in the first place idiot!” You waved the bag of treats around animatedly making Bam narrow his brows. 

“You keep cat treats in your room?” 

You rolled your eyes. “Not the point.” Bam took this as his queue to push himself into your room despite your attempt to bar him. 

“No, not tonight Bam.” You tried to avoid eye contact but he just kept pushing, closing the door behind him as you both spoke lowly. 

“Come on. Jenn’s finally out of town for once.” You swallowed thickly at the mention of her name and Bam picked up on this. 

“You’re not starting to feel all guilty now are you? You and Jenn don't even like each other!” 

You shot Bam a nasty look. “We like each other!’ 

He simply scoffed. “Oh yeah like you even speak at all.” 

“Well who’s fault is that, huh?!” Bam rolled his eyes and bit his lip.

“Don't get all mad at me tonight. Come on I know you want this.” He leaned closer to you, neck bent so your faces were close together, your breath hitching as you tried to delay the inevitable. 

You folded your arms and looked him in the eyes, which certainly didn't help. God he looks sexy when he's needy. He wet his lips and took your wrist in his hand, leading your own down to his crotch, palm feeling the tent in his pants. 

“Feel how bad I need you.” 

You thought of a million things you could’ve said to him. Tell him to go jerk himself off, call Jenn if he needed to fuck that bad, even to just get the fuck out but none of those options seemed tempting. In fact the only thing you really wanted to give in to were his enticing lips, practically begging to be kissed. And that's what you did, crashing yours onto his. He always made it so you made the first move, probably some fucked up little game of his.

 As much as you hated yourself for what you did, you always found yourself under him or on top of him, his lips on yours and hands clutching at every inch of your body whenever Jenn was out of the way. You always tried to keep your noises quiet, whimpering into his mouth or biting down on your hand but you could never be silent enough, the guys giving you awkward side glances each morning after, no matter how hard you tried to hide it, they knew. You hated how their eyes bored into you, feeling the judgement sink into your skin even if they were as much your friends as they were Bam’s. But you’d much prefer judgement over the dreaded... pity. 

Pity. Fuck pity. It’s not like you’re not complicit in what you and Bam would do, it was your fuck up too, not just his. You resented the fact you might be viewed as a poor little damsel, the other woman, the one waiting on Bam’s knock on your door like your prince charming had finally arrived. You wanted to fuck him too, not just be fucked. You were getting something out of this whole deal as well, or so you told yourself. 

That night it was rather quick, no stretched-out foreplay just him inside of you in a matter of minutes. You were conscious of the fact that with each thrust of Bam’s hips, your headboard would lightly hit against your wall, the wall of which you shared with Ryan. Already your head was swarming with imaginings of the looks he would give you in a couple hours, your cheeks now burning from something other than your impending orgasm. You shoved your face down in the pillows to muffle the sounds of your moans as you reached your big finish, Bam’s hands holding your hips with force as he continued to plow into you. Your tightening around Bam lead to his increasing moans and even tighter grip on your waist, thumb pushing into the flesh forcefully. With a final statement of “I’m gonna come.” Bam spilled into you, letting out a loud groan the others had to have heard. 

After a few seconds of panting stillness, Bam removed himself from you and fell flat on his back beside you on the mattress, stuffing his dick back in his pants. You rested your head against his chest for as long as Bam deemed it necessary before he stood up and picked up his sweatpants, ready to head back to his room. He never spent the night, too afraid of the tenderness.

The next morning was about as awkward as you anticipated, a brooding silence falling upon the group as you ate the breakfast Ape kindly made for you all. Bam was always good at pretending nothing had happened and that everything was normal, you not so much. Your eyes were shifting all around the room to avoid Ryan’s gaze that kept falling onto you, much too embarrassed to address anything. When the others were distracted by something in the living room Ryan finally opened his mouth.

“Thin walls.” You felt the toast you had eaten get stuck in your throat. Sure you knew that they knew but this was really the first time it was being talked about in the open, the topic was unainomously agreed to be taboo, you figured. You swallowed the food and scratched the back of your head, still not looking Ryan in the eyes.

“Not like I’m proud of it.” You started chewing the skin off of your lips, a nervous habit. You felt Ryan move his chair closer before he spoke your name in a low drawl. That's what forced you to make eye contact. His eyes weren’t cold and judgy but appeared soft, almost too soft. 

“Don't go around pitying me. I know it’s fucked up, I’m not being used.” You spat, a little more harsh than you intended. Ryan just tilted his head.

“Oh yeah? He comes to you for no reason at all then, just your company?” Tough fucking love. You knew deep down Ry was right, that Bam was using you for sex and nothing more. You weren't even sure if you were doing it for a rush or for sex but it wasn’t because you loved him or anything, you didn’t. Even still it was easier to act angry than actually call out the truth.

“Fuck off Ryan. It’s none of your business.” You scowled, shoving your chair back and standing up, ready to go off in a huff. 

“Stop doing it to yourself.” You rolled your eyes at Ryan's words.

“I don't need your sympathy.” And with that you were off to your room, ready to sulk for the day.

Over the next month or so you dwelled on the thoughts Ryan’s snarky comments brought up. “Why do you do it?” The question stuck in your brain like gum in your hair, bothersome and stubborn to get out. It wasn't until the night Jenn got home after a particularly long period away that it dawned on you. That night your bed felt so empty and your body so cold and untouched. You needed the warmth, the body, the feeling. When Jenn was around you were practically ignored and so you longed desperately for Bam to notice you, to talk to you, to touch you. You didn't want him, you wanted the thing he gave to you that you didn't get very often. Attention. 

Jenn and Bam were fighting more often now, you knew this not just from the sounds of yelling and smashing coming from their room but because the knocks were becoming more frequent and your sex even rougher. He used you to take out his anger, tight grip in your hair and hand over your throat, tightening with each thrust. He enjoyed the fact you let him do whatever he wanted to you, that you weren’t like Jenn, kicking up a fuss at every given opportunity. In fact you were obedient, opening your legs and presenting your mouth for fucking whenever he needed it. You liked the feeling of being needed, that Bam wanted you. However those emotions were often overshadowed by the fact you felt pathetic. Humiliated that you allowed yourself to be used so explicitly. Now your were beginning to pity yourself, the very thing you hated most.

After another night with Bam, Ryan’s eyes burned into you. 

“Can you stop looking at me like that?” You muttered so only he could hear, the others talking and laughing loudly on the other side of the table. Ryan continued to stare, leaving you to glare at him.

“You deserve better.” He spoke and you scoffed. 

“Can we stop with this? I’m an adult I can make my own decisions”

“Bam’s an asshole, just stop doing it to yourself.” You felt your face begin to burn, eyes flicking up to meet his, no pity in them anymore but they looked almost pleading. 

“Why do you care so much?” 

“Because I care about you.” 

The words stuck around in the air for a while, unsure if you should respond or not. Ryan was sweet, he didn’t deserve the rude comments you were snapping back with, you were just too stubborn to admit he was right. You bit your lip, eyes meeting his. Then you got up and walked away, leaving Ryan at the table. Ryan had recently bought an apartment in West Chester and seemed to be spending more and more time there after that whole encounter. You weren’t sure if they were related or not but you didn’t want to think about that. 

Jenn was away again and this night you and the crew went out, not something very unusual but Ryan skipped out. You didn't think much of it seeing as you didn’t see him too often anyways but a little part of you missed him, that wasn’t something you wanted to unpack today. Nevertheless you all ended up at Kildare’s, drinking beers and playing pool pretty horribly. It was you and Bam against Dico and Raab and the two of you were doing really badly but still having fun. You liked when you were just being normal together, talking and laughing and having a good time. That was until he got more touchy, hand resting on your lower back and guiding your body as you played. No matter how natural he made it seem you felt ashamed, embarrassed that the others were seeing you act like that right in front of their eyes. It didn’t seem all that bad when it was behind closed doors but it being opened up for them all to see? That's when you felt used, like this deal was no longer fun, that the shame was truly outweighing whatever attention you got. 

After trying to avoid Bam the entire night his knuckles hit against your door once again after you all got home. You sighed, knowing that you'd have to shut him down for good now. Really for good. 

“I can’t.” is all you said when you opened the door just a crack, trying to avoid his eyes. He didn’t listen, pushing your door open and letting himself in.

“Come on, don't be like that.” You shook your head, trying to swat away his hands that held your face.

“I can’t do this again Bam.’ 

“You say that every time.” Your stomach turned, you weren’t gonna let his blue eyes persuade you again. 

“I mean it this time. I’m really done with this, it’s fucked up.” Bam rolled his eyes.

“Every time you say that and yet every time we do it. Can’t we just skip the whole moral thing tonight?” You glared at him, feeling utterly disgusted.

“You don't get it.”

Bam scoffed. “Get what?”

Your cheeks burned red. “They don’t look at you like they look at me.”

Bam looked confused. “What the hell are you talking about?”

You felt you eyes begin to well up, pushing Bam’s arms off of you. “The guys. it’s humiliating.” Bam looked at you like a mad woman.

‘”I don't want to be your other woman anymore. The girl you fuck when you’re bored.” Bam scoffed again.

“Are you serious? That was the whole fucking deal! Don’t act like you’re not getting anything out of this either.”

“Really Bam? Tell me what I’m getting out of this then!” Bam tried to hush you which just angered you even more. 

“Keep my voice down?! It’s not like they don’t know anyways!” You yelled, Bam gritting his teeth together. 

“What the hell is the matter with you, huh?! Why now? Why is this suddenly a problem now?!” You contemplated for a moment as the tears continued to fall. 

“Ryan was right, you are an asshole.” You could’ve picked anything Ryan had said to you right then, but you just said the thing you knew would hurt him the most. And with that you grabbed your car keys and ran out of Castle Bam with Bam shouting down at you to wait but you didn’t listen, clambering into your car and speeding off. Your brain was hardly working then, too many thoughts circulating around to even consider what you were doing until you were outside Ryan's apartment, banging on the door in just a baggy t shirt and shorts. 

When the door opened your body acted before your mind did, flinging yourself on the unsuspecting man and kissing him with such force. Once he realised what had happened his hands held your hips as he kissed you back, walking backwards to let you in. He shut the door behind you and pushed you into it, your kiss becoming more and more heated. 

“Sorry for being an asshole.” You murmured against his lips, pulling away just to say it. “You were right.” 

He laughed, his beard rubbing against your chin. 

“Been waiting for you to say that.” You pulled away and grinned at him, removing your shirt in one swift move, leaving yourself in just a bra and skimpy shorts. 

“Been waiting on a lot of things I bet.” Ryan grinned and bit his lip at your forwardness, nodding as his hands roamed down to grab at your ass, moving you both to his bedroom. You continued to kiss as you pulled Ryan’s shirt over his head as well, sitting on the edge of the bed and kicking your shorts off while Ryan shimmied off his own pants.

“So what changed?” Ry asked, moving you onto your back as he started to kiss down your neck, fingers already working at unclasping your bra. 

“Don't know.” You giggled as the pecks moving down to your collarbone tickled your skin.

“Maybe I missed you more than I missed him.” Ryan smiled up at you at that, fingers sliding under the band of your panties at your hips. Your breath hitched as his lips made it to your tummy, kissing you softly. 

“Is this okay?” He whispered against your skin and you nodded, granting him permission to pull your panties down. His own breath hitched as he saw you completely exposed for him, not because he could do whatever he wanted to you but because he could finally make you feel good. He started littering kisses on the inside of your thighs, wet hot ones. Your heart continued to beat steadily fast the closer his lips got to your heat, your back arching once he finally reached that place. He planted a kiss on your clit before moving down to your centre, hiking up your leg so it went down his back as he drove straight in. Your moans increased in volume the longer he went on and the faster he got, tongue moving in and out of you. 

You shifted around the place, bucking up into his face and hand finding itself gripping his hair. That's when his hand moved up and began rubbing circles in your clit as he tongue-fucked you. He looked up at you and god were you a sight for sore eyes. Your cheeks were a splotchy red and your hair was splayed out, bare chest rising and falling as your features contorted with pleasure, sweet noises and whimpers leaving your parted lips. Ry felt himself grow hard as he observed the way you looked when he was giving you that pleasure, blissed out and needy. He continued at it, this time sucking at your clit as his fingers moved in and out of you, your moans only getting louder.

“Fuck Ry, I’m close.” You moaned out, fingers tightening their hold on Ry’s hair. He didn’t respond, only moving faster and faster until eventually you finished on his fingers, his tongue replacing those as he sloppily made out with your core. It took you pushing his head away to avoid overstimulation for him to pull away, lips glistening with your slick. He smiled as he licked his lips, wiping them with the back of his hand and crawling up to kiss you, letting you taste yourself from his tongue.

“Where the fuck did you learn that?!” You laughed against his mouth, hands resting on his cheeks.

“I’m a good listener.” He grinned stupidly back, lips moving back to kiss you as your hands drifted down to pull his dick out. It wasn’t long until he had his boxers kicked off and on the floor and his cock in your hand, pumping him slowly, your lips still touching. You arched your back and brought your arm up to rub circles into Ry’s jaw, encouraging him to enter you. You winced as he did, the pain just a little intense but his soothing hand on your waist made it bearable. 

“You okay?” Ryan whispered and you nodded, holding his face and kissing him until he began to move. He was a lot slower and gentler than you thought he’d be, his scruffy beard and persona didn’t ring true all the time you supposed. Soon enough Ry’s pace quickened as he nipped at your neck, your fingers threading through his hair, moaning into his ear. You could feel his thumb press harder into the flesh of your waist as he lifted himself up from your neck, hips snapping forward. He pushed some hair off of your face as he continued to fuck you and the look he gave you could’ve made you come right then and there. His cheeks were flushed as well as yours and his hair was all messed up from your hands and his eyes were almost completely blown out, looking down at you like you were the only girl in the world. You lifted your head up to kiss him but it was more like lips touching as you whimpered and moaned into his mouth. 

After a few more thrusts you felt yourself inch closer and closer to the edge, moans getting louder the closer you got. 

“I’m close Ry.” You whispered, kissing him right after you said it. He didn't respond, only going faster, determined to make you finish and he certainly succeeded. Your legs began to shake as you came, the orgasm washing over your entire body as you threw your head back, mouth hanging open and eyes shut tightly. Ryan thrusted a couple more times before pulling out and finishing on your stomach, his cum painting your skin as you settled.

Before you could even move Ryan was already up fetching a towel to wipe you down, dragging it across your heat gently as well as your tummy. You sat up on your elbows as you observed Ry struggling to put his boxers back on. Once he finally succeeded, he turned to face you, smiling like a schoolgirl when he saw you all splayed out for him. 

“Been a while since a pretty naked girl has been on my bed.” He giggled, clambering into bed beside you and pulling you to lie on his chest. You grinned too as he played with your hair.

“All this time I’ve been fucking the wrong guy.” 

‘Well I could’ve told you that.”

End.

@gnarkillknoxville @jackussy420 @lovexjoe @nonbinarypontius @steve-osahottie @izzaaaaaa @bambammargera @spoookyberry

[cillivnz]

⋆˚࿔ 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

[𝘴𝘢𝘮 𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘳𝘰𝘦]

pairing. 𝘴𝘢𝘮 𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘳𝘰𝘦 x f!reader

synopsis. competitiveness is a vice, your nature gets the best of you when your best friend challenges you to climb the top of the slide before him. since you won, you deserve to be rewarded, and sam recognises that.

includes. nsfw themes (18+), exhibitionism, outdoor/public sex, perv!sam, clueless!reader, cunnilingus, vaginal fingering, degradation, possessive!sam, dub-con, loss of virginity/innocence kink, overstimulation, clit-play, unprotected sex (PiV), dacryphilia, cream-pie, smoking, theft?

word count. no idea, don’t ask.

a/n. was this asked for? no. did i deliver, still? fuck yeah. i really got lost in how to describe the situation, just go with the flow until you reach the fucking, shh. both protagonists are adults. i don’t proof-read my shit anymore.

PEERING AT YOU FROM AFAR, sam’s serpentine tongue toys with his labret piercing. you’re in that skimpy skirt again— the one that perks the unwanted attention of everyone in the neighbourhood. it’s not that he hated you in them— the low-cut tank tops spilling your cleavage, it’s just a sight he’s reserved for him, in the dark of his room while his cock is milking into the panties you deemed missing.

you were waddling towards the slide, your hips swaying with the sea breeze. sam’s jaw clenched when he got one peak of the fat flesh of your ass. he scoffs at your piss-poor attempt at dressing when you barely manage to cover your mound. ‘ever the tease’, he groans. as he flicks alight his marlboro red, the devil on his shoulder— his trusted advocate— spoke.

“hey, bambi,” your head whipped towards him, the nickname never failing to make you clench your thighs. “you still wanna learn to skate? yeah?” his raspy voice had a tinge of amusement to it, a frown encasing his eyebrow piercing as he peers through the sun. “yes!” you spoke all-too-eagerly. you had been dying to learn how to skate, courtesy of your obsession with Bam Margera (something that always irked sam out for reasons unknown), so it was natural for you to resort to your trusted (and professionally good) best friend for some lessons. what you hadn’t anticipated was to be turned down so bluntly. sam not wanting for you to break that pretty little nose or have a black-eye around those bambi eyes. you’d been pestering him for weeks, but his patience seemed endless, that is, until he found a good reward for himself in this deal. “tell y’ what,” he says, having your undivided attention towards him. “if you climb to the top of the slide before me, i’ll give you skating lessons,” a genuine smile flashed on his face, “and if i win,” now that smile turned into a smirk, “well, you’ll see.” he said, motioning for you to take the headstart.

sam knew you weren’t the athletic type, and that only way to climb up was up the slide. still, he let you sprint towards it first, loving the sight of your skirt swaying in the wind, giving him a delicious peak at your baby blue panties.

seven seconds barely in and he gets up from the swing, placing his lit smoke on the metal, before darting towards you. catching up to you was as smooth a breeze as the wind flowing through the neighbourhood. he wasn’t athletic either, but his long limbs gave him the needed upper hand. the salty breeze carried oceanic oud and the stench bittersweet whiff of marijuana as sam dashed past you, but you weren’t having it. earlier, the shame of your potential indecent exposure prevented you from pulling a usain bolt on him, but having him win with all odds in his favour and despite the headstart— yeah, you weren’t having it.

you dashed forth, feeling your skirt sway away with the teasing breeze, lunging for the slide the minute you reached it’s foot. sam’s eyes widened when you picked up your pace, and when you sprinted, with not a care in the world, his eyes nearly popped out of his skull to see your baby blue panties constricting the fat globes of your ass. sam didn’t like running, but he hated running with a boner.

you reached the top of the slide, doing a giddy little victory dance. sam’s vindictive eyes landed on you, watching you sway your hips while your chest huffed with pride and adrenaline.

“my fault for giving you that head-start, bambi,” he chewed his cheek in annoyance. “tough luck, sammy,” you giggled. “so, when do you start giving me skating lessons?” your big doe eyes were shining, looking expectantly at your new mentor. “now, hold on,” he said, voice low. it was then you realised you had unknowingly taken a seat on the slide, and sam was crouched between your legs, very, very close to your legs. you gulped, “what now?”

“yes, you won, but i need a promising fee to convince me to lend you my precious skateboard,” he pouts, “you know how rare that heartagram one is.” it’s true, sam had to fight his old man nearly every day for allowance to get it. “what- how could i convince you?” you were desperate.

“how about you start by spreading your legs?”

you gasped the minute those words left his mouth, unable to process let alone comply. he huffed, “why must i do everything for you, bambi? hm?” he jerked open your legs, immediately pushing his torso between your knees. “not that i mind, bambi,” he continued, cooing, “you’d probably exhaust that dumb little brain of yours a day without me,” he shoved up your skirt. “sam, what are you—” you were cut off by the feel of his thumb poking right at your clit. “what does it look like i’m doing, silly girl? look at that, i didn’t even have to look for your clit, the little thing’s so swollen— poking through your panties, baby,” he rambled, applying pressure on your nub.

it took about a minute of him toying with your clit before your soft cotten panties were damp, ruined by the slick gushing out of you. “slutty little thing, look at that,” sam groaned, transfixed by the sight of the wet spot growing in your underwear.

“sammy, not here….” you whimpered out, “here’s exactly where, baby. ‘community park’s where the neighbourhood sluts get it.” you couldn’t help but moan at his crude tongue. “oh?” you were hoping he wouldn’t, but his ears were quick to catch on to the soft sounds. “i’ve got me a whore with a degradation kink, huh,” sam chuckles, sending tingles through your core. his long raven locs fell over his pale face, a checkerboard contrast.

“lift your hips, bambi,” his raspy voice breathy from arousal. you were hesitant to comply, but had you not found release soon, you were sure to explode. so, you do.

he quickly took off your panties, pocketing them with a smug smirk. you gasped at the cold sensation of the metal platform beneath you. you awaited a sly remark at how your arousal leaked down to your thighs, but none came. your eyes flick to his, and your heart skipped a beat at the sight. sam monroe, your best friend of years, your biggest tease and mocker, was now left enchanted by the sight of your gushing pussy, all puffy and swole with need. his chest heaved up and down, pearly beads of sweat forming around his face, like iridescent piercings. “sam… touch me, please,” the words shamelessly escaped your lips, but you needed to break his trance.

his eyes flicked up to yours, mouthing agape. he nodded, tongue darting out to wet his plump lips. he spread your legs, and then your folds, watching your tiny hole gape around your fluttering lips. he watched how your clit protruded, desperate for attention— his attention. “tell me, bambi,” he asked, his gaze burning a hole through your body. “has anyone else ever made you this wet? ‘your clit ever swell so much for somebody?” he coaxed, watching you writhe and throb in anticipation. “n-no, sam,” you whimpered. “bambi, say it,” he looked at you through his firm brow, a warning glare. “no one’s- no one has made my cl-clit so… swell,” you burnt with shame, moreover with arousal. it’s true, if you’ve ever pleasured yourself, it’s to the unholy thoughts of him.

“good girl, bambi,” he said, placing an open-mouthed kiss on your clit, his mouth drowning your nub in his saliva. a sharp sensation of pleasure coursed through your body when the tip of his tongue circled your clit, taunting it painfully. he began sucking on it, which was when you felt his tongue piercing come in contact with your little hole. your eyes shot open, widening when his tongue began thrusting in and out of your walls. his ring-clad fingers quickly replaced his tongue, scissoring your hole open. your body shuddered at the catalyst sensations; the hot metal on his tongue and the cold ones pushing through your cunt.

“fuck,” you moaned. “shh, pretty girls don’t curse,” sam ‘tsk’ed, leaving your clit with a ‘pop’. two long, thick digits were pummelling through your unused cunt. you were squirming, gushing, creaming down his digits. “sam, i’m— gonna cum, sam!” you babbled, he nodded fervently, with your clit trapped in his mouth. quickly, he swapped. his tongue thrusted into your cunt while his fingers vigorously rubbed your clit. with the sensation of his piercing stroking your velvety walls, you were a goner. you gushed into his mouth with a pornographic moan, legs twitching around his broad shoulders.

he parted from you, only to manhandle your legs as further apart as he could, sticking them between two poles. you gasped at the burning stretch, your cunt on display for his ravenous eyes. “sorry, bambi. i know you’re a bed-of-roses-kinda-girl but i just can’t hold it anymore…” before you could fathom what he meant he had already unzipped his black jeans, his cock sprang out.

“no, sam, not here! please!” you shrieked a little too late. the fat tip of his cock had already began rubbing up and down your slit, mixing your gush and his precum together, turning all thoughts in your little bambi brain into mush. sam stood tall on the ladder, so further below you yet hovering over you. this was the most perfect position, he thought, having stuck your legs as wide open as he could, levelling your warm cunt with his cock so all he had to do was slam into your sheathing walls— this was bliss; his reward for being so patient with your teasing ass and your punishment for testing him.

with one shove, he was tearing through your hymen, but since he had prepped you, the pain lasted less, and because sam was ever the gentleman he even gave you two whole minutes to adjust to his intrusion, while he basked in your suffocating warmth. “bambi, this cunt is like a hole to heaven,” he sighed, head thrown back, eyes closed in euphoria. “no wonder kids around the block want to hit it,” he clenched his jaw, smirking to himself at the thought of being the first to enter you. you writhed, overwhelmed with how whole your hole felt (horny word-play, they don’t call me sin for nothing). soon enough, his patience wore off and he began thrusting into you rhythmically.

“s-sam, slow d-down…” you moaned, trying to close your legs, had they not been fixed in place by your cruel penetrator. every muscle of yours burned sore, but the sensation of him pounding into you overpowered all. “fuuuck, i’m not gonna last long, bambi,” he groaned in your ear, lifting your chin to place a sloppy kiss on your lips. “oh, shit,” he moaned into your mouth, biting down hard on your plump lower lip. you moaned in response. his fingers made their way to your clit, flicking it fervently, feeling you clench around his cock in response, sam unexpectedly came. the warmth of his load shooting into you had you spiralling away into your second orgasm. your nails clawed at his forearms, begging for him to stop, but he wouldn’t give it a rest until every drop of his seed shot into you. the tears streaming down your lashes intensified, and a pussy-drunk sam was quick to lick them away, kissing your soft cheeks.

“sam, what have you done…?” you asked, half ashamed, half aroused. “what i should’ve a while ago,” he said, nonchalantly, getting down the slide and lifting you with him. you blushed at the ease with which he carried you in his arms. “sam, my panties—” “naw, bambi, they’re mine now,” he patted the garment in his pocket, “—fit right into my collection,” he accidentally let out. “what?” the pieces of the puzzle fit. “you’ve been stealing my panties?!” you yelled. his sudden change in demeanour whenever you’d enter your room after leaving him there, alone, and how he’d mysteriously be lurking around your underwear drawer was explained.

“i can neither confirm nor deny that,” he said, lifting the cigarette butt he placed on the metal swing he sat at earlier.

he in fact did confirm that, later that night, when you received a video of him on your phone, jerking off his swollen cock— with the red lace panties you’d been searching for all week— wrapped around his cock, stained in his cum.

may all competitions in life be this rewarding.

main masterlist. blog directory. more of Sam Monroe.

[missusdunn]

Bam Margera X f!reader X Ryan Dunn pt.1

Warnings!! - Smut, Oral f!giving, cussing, 18++++

Dating Bam Margera threw you into a lot of spontaneous adventures. The parties, impulsive trips across the world, dangerous stunts. It became normal to expect the unexpected. The only predictable thing about Bam was his selfishness especially when it came to you. You are his and his only. You couldn’t even have a friendly conversation with another man without Bam going into a bitch fit. However, there is one exception. Ryan Dunn. They’re a two-in-one deal. You can’t get close to one without the other. And Bam trusts Ryan so no reason for jealousy. Just a trio of pals.

One night, Ryan invites the two of you to his apartment to drink and hang out. Anticlimactic but fun nonetheless. You and Bam head over there with a bottle of vodka and let yourselves in. “Oh hey, you two! Thanks for knocking, so considerate!” Ryan greeted. Bam chuckles and says “Don’t act like you don’t walk into my house like that, asswipe.” “Whatever,” Ryan grabs the vodka from Bam “this’ll make up for it.” I roll my eyes, kick off my shoes, and make my way to the couch. Bam follows suit and Ryan goes to the kitchen to get cups. Bam stretches and melts into his seat. “Finally a night to relax with my two favorite people.” He smiles and puts his arm over my shoulder. I playfully roll my eyes “Don’t be sappy just to get into my pants later.” He sarcastically puts his hands up “Sorry, sorry.” He smirks. “I have better tactics anyway.” He cups my face with his right hand and leans in for a kiss. Of course, I kiss back and it doesn’t take long until his tongue is in my mouth. After a few more seconds Ryan is back. “Excuse me but I’d appreciate it if you two didn’t fuck on my couch!” He says playfully. “We’re not fucking, Dunn,” Bam grumbles with a slight pout having cut the make-out short. “Yet. Thank god I stopped it just in time.” Ryan says placing cups on the coffee table. I laugh and pick up my glass to fill with liquor. Ryan stops me from picking up the bottle and pours it for me. “Oh, such a gentleman,” I say sarcastically while taking a sip. “Anything for you, darling.” He playfully winks filling up the other two glasses. “You fuckers know I’m right here right?” Bam rolls his eyes as Ryan and I laugh. Bam grabs the remote and tosses it to Ryan. “Put some shit on, Dunn let’s get fucked up.” As he chugs his first round.

A couple hours later we’re all buzzed. It didn’t take long for the TV to become background noise. After multiple conversations filled with slurs and giggles the topic of Ryan’s love life came up.

“You really haven’t been getting any lately?” Bam laughs. “Dude it’s not a big deal!” Ryan defends himself. “I’ve just been busy!” Bam continues to laugh “Yeah you’re so busy binge drinking on your couch!” Ryan’s brows furrow “fuck you.” I hit Bam on the shoulder and give Ryan a sympathetic look. “Ry, there’s no shame in not having sex! Not everyone can be sexually active twenty-four seven.” I say “Unlike some whores…” I motion to Bam. Ryan lets out a chuckle and Bam rolls his eyes. “If I’m a whore that would make you one too, idiot,” Bam argues. “Oh babe you and I both know that’s not how it works,” I sigh “Your body count is 10x times mine!” “Whatever since you’re fucking me you’re a whore by association.” He snickers. “You’re such an idiot.” I sip my drink. Bam smirks and leans in. “Your idiot.” Kissing me and turning it into a full-on make-out session in less than ten seconds. That’s gotta be a record.

Ryan groans. “Again please do that anywhere else.” Bam pulls away and looks at his friend. “Yknow what just fucking join, Dunn.” Ryan’s eyes go wide and I’m too shocked to say anything. “What?” Ryan asks, thinking it’s a joke. “It’ll help with your blue balls that make you so pissy,” bam smirks “and I know how long you’ve wanted to fuck y/n.” Ryan keeps his eyes on Bam with red coating his cheeks. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Bam chuckles “Yes you do!” He points out “Before we started dating you, I would talk about all the things we’d do to her!” Now I’m the one with cherry-red cheeks. “Come on, Dunn you down or not?” Bam looks at me as if he’s asking with his eyes. “I’m down if Ryan’s down…” I stumbled out. Bam looks back at Ryan “Alright, let’s do it then.” Ryan agrees. Bam smirks in satisfaction and motions Ryan to sit next to me. Now I'm in the middle. Bam goes for my neck kissing and sucking. While I’m left looking into his friend’s eyes. Ryan hesitated a little bit but then kissed me like it was the end of the world. My throat vibrated with moans and Bam’s hands made their way to my chest. Groping me through my top before pulling it over my chest to expose my tits. I gasped into Ryan’s mouth from the sudden movements. Ryan pulls back to look at my breasts, groaning at the sight. He pushes Bam’s hands away and replaces them with his own. Bam immediately starts to kiss me sloppily. As Ryan has begun sucking on my tits making sure both nipples get the same amount of attention. My moans gradually increase the hotter it gets. I push both the boys away from me. They give me a confused and concerned look. Before they could say anything I got down on my knees in front of them. Their eyes widened in realization before slightly scooting closer together so they weren't too far apart. I began to palm them through their jeans, both of them already hard. “I need you both now,” I whine. Immediately the two start fumbling with their belts whipping their dicks out.

I spit onto both of my hands and begin to jerk my boyfriend and his best friend off. Bam’s groaning and Ryan has his eyes closed letting out breathy moans. I wrap my mouth around Bam’s dick and begin to deep throat him. Trying to get his cock covered in as much saliva as possible. As my left hand continues to stroke Ryan’s Bam grabs my hair and pushes me down on his length a bit more. Groaning when he reaches the back of my throat. I push back off his lap and replace my mouth with my hand. I shift my attention to Ryan and I start to suck the tip of his cock, swirling my tongue around it. And jerking off his shaft twisting up and down. Ryan’s heavily breathing with his eyes locked on mine. I continue to switch between the two men with my mouth, whilst jerking the other one off. Bam’s moans get louder letting me know that he's close. I have a hand on each of the men's shafts. I begin to firmly stroke Bam, twisting up and down. My tongue hovers over his tip waiting for his cum. With a final groan, Bam shoots his load onto my face. From the lewd image of my face covered in cum Ryan finishes in my hand. “Shit.” Ryan curses. I move my face towards my cum-covered hand and clean it up with my tongue. Both boys catch their breaths before sharing a chuckle. “I can’t believe we just fucking did that.” Ryan laughs. “I remove my hands from them, cleaning myself up with a nearby throw blanket. “Consider it an early Christmas present.” Bam continues. “You may wanna wash this…” I smirk, tossing the soiled blanket at Ryan. The two laugh as I get up to go to the bathroom. Until Bam interrupts my movements “Hey, where are you going? It’s your turn.”

[b4mpyre-k1zz3s]

Could you write some Bam x m!reader or even gn!reader? No specific requests,, smut fluff hurt/comfort I don’t care I just need more non f!reader Bam ficsssss 🥲

Bloodletting

A vampiric earl in ‘1880s London discovers a taste like no other, and an alcoholic surgeon finds someone who doesn’t mind the smell of death that clings to his clothes. It’s a win- win for both men.

Bam Margera X Masc!Reader

(Vampire!Au, Fluff, Angst)

6k Words

Warnings: Highly suggestive content, alcoholism, scent kink, biting, blood, injuries, descriptions of Victorian-era surgeries, vomiting, corpses, manipulation, bullying, kissing, possessive behavior, jealousy, slut shaming (metaphorical)

An: Thank you so much for the request! What is it with me and writing fanfiction about Bam and vampires? I also noticed that most jackass fan fictions are for fem!readers so I can see where you’re coming from! I always try to make an effort to write fics with Gn!Reader but I really do think I should write more Masc!Reader, so feel free to send in any requests you may have for this! Also the manor Bam lives I’min this fic was not so sneakily modeled after the one on the cover of Bara No Seidou by Malice mixer (bc their music also rly influenced this fic!) lol anyways thank you for the request and please keep them coming! :)

It's not uncommon to hear people say that their careers drive them to drink, but you were sure that you were the only man in London who could honestly say that yours was entirely responsible for your drinking habit. Three months ago, you graduated top of your general surgery class at St Damian Medical School and you had just now come to realize the kind of stress that came with the job. Who knew performing autopsies and amputations day in and day out isn’t exactly easy on the mind? Despite that, you couldn’t complain about the pay, not the great company you found to share a pint with down at the local pub. Well, a couple pints, and some gin, and maybe some whiskey if you had to break out the leeches that day. Point is, they didn’t seem to care nor notice the cadaverous smell of death and formaldehyde that seemed to linger around you once you got off work. But after all the fun ended, you would have to make the long, stumbling walk back to the East End slums you lived in by only the light of the gas lamps that lined the River Thames and try to get enough sleep to function the next morning.

This was one of those nights. Just as the AMs lazily rolled around, you decided to depart, waving goodbye to all your friends and starting out into the cool, yellow painted misty night. Laughing to yourself at something one of the fellows said earlier, you were already pretty dizzy as you trudged through the streets, eerily quiet save for the clammy winds that blew in from the riverfront. The water that collected in the cracks of the cobblestone rippled under your boots as you dragged your feet, drunkenly unaware of what was around you. But despite everything in your surroundings pointing to you being completely alone, you got the very strange feeling that something or someone was watching you. Shoving your hands in your pockets, you ignored the hairs that stood up on the back of your neck as you passed a dim alleyway, trying to ignore the shadow in the corner of your eye.

Out of the dense fog, a pair of strong arms that suddenly wrapped around your torso and pulled you off your feet put it in your mind just how bad a decision that was. Drawn far away from the reach of lamplight, you were too slow to react as your body fell back against a firm torso and you froze in fear. A dark, leather gloved hand seized your jaw and wrenched your head to one side while an arm snaked around your waist, holding you snugly against your assailant. A low, predatory chuckle rumbled out of the chest of whoever was holding you, breathing little puffs of white smoke against your skin as he leaned in close to your neck and took a deep inhale, much like how one would relish the scent of a delicious meal. There was something that came over you as you were trapped in the clutches of your captor that made your head swim that made it so you didn’t so much as thunk to squirm as you felt what seemed to be two needles just barely scrape your jugular vein before plunging deep into your neck.

The lascivious suckling and laving noises echoed against the brick walls of the alleyway as the man who had you in his arms pinned you to the rough stone. Pupils blown, your body trembled at the blissed out groan in your ear, entirely helpless as your knees went all weak and your heavy eyelids threatened to fall shut. Just as you were about to fall unconscious from blood loss, blood permitting your clothes, you collapsed backward against your captor and he placed a sloppy, open mouthed kiss to your still bleeding wound before unceremoniously letting your limp body fall to the ground. Staring down at the body at his feet, a dark, lustful glint flashed through his eyes as he licked up the rich, savory liquid that dripped from his lips.

The next morning, when you woke up in the alleyway without any memory of falling asleep there, you chalked it up as a nightmare. Simply standing up, you brushed the fronts of your trousers off and headed home to clean up before your next shift. Your pounding headache that you were sure resulted from drinking made your wince as you splashed water on your face, not noticing the two, swollen little marks that remained on your neck nor the blood that stained your collar that you were pretty sure was there before the previous night. With the work you had cut out for you that day, you couldn’t afford to be late that morning. For the past two weeks your superiors had been breathing down your neck about those bodies that had been washing up in the river- prostitutes, mostly, but there were some urchins in the mix as well. After ending up in your hands, the cause of death for the cadavers was impossible for you to identify no matter how many times you went through the list- no signs of a struggle or trauma, but no bloating from drowning. However, since you were a fresh face in the medical field, the last thing you wanted to do was discredit yourself, so you reported the cause of death as the latter.

As you hurried down your front steps, a large ship drifted down the river in front of your apartment, the hand painted script on the back indicating it was a part of Earl Margera’s cargo fleet. Rumor has it his family got their old money fortune from the opium trade, but that did nothing to halt business for him. If you were a person in London that needed to move things, he was the man to call. Recently, you had gotten word that the Earl would be holding another one of his yearly lavish galas at his manor that he lived in with his council (the group of men that advised his business decisions) and that all of London’s finest would be invited- the only reason his eccentric lordship would bother to make an appearance. Making your way into work, you thought about how women would throw themselves at his feet, almost literally sometimes, but the Earl would pay them about as much mind as he did to the men constantly trying to win his favor to get their hands on his vast fortune, a constitution you could respect on some level.

Blinking hard and trying to pull yourself together, you were tying up your stiff, blood stained surgical apron as you got ready to slice up the body of the day, when one of your coworkers came excitedly running up to you. He thrust a piece of paper into your hands, “Y/N! Y/N! Have you seen this?” Speculatively, you scanned over the yellowed, crinkled letter, your eyes widening at what you read. That gala- yes, the one at the Earl’s house- was not only a charity gala, but a charity gala for the hospital. A bewildered smile spread across your face as you processed the news, “Oh my…This is incredible!” Your mind went wild as you thought about it- perhaps with the money, you could afford to finally purchase a new set of surgical instruments or switch to chloroform for sedation instead of relying on alcohol! Oh, this just couldn’t get better. According to the letter, the ball would be held two weeks from that day, giving you ample time to receive your paycheck and purchase some formal clothes for the event.

The air was thick with tension as you stood in the Earl’s front room with all the other dignified guests, the sweet scent of Acanthus and Hemlock blossoms drifting in from the garden through the wide open front doors. Above you, a large, crystal chandelier hung from the peak of the ribbed vault ceiling, cascading light onto the tall columns that held up the balcony of the second story. The manor really was grand, in every sense of the word. While you were taking all this opulence in, the room fell silent at a high pitched whistle from the top of the staircase and everyone shifted their gaze towards the sound. You did too, just in time to catch the Earl hoping up to slide all the way down the long wooden banister of the staircase. Not exactly the entrance you expected of him, but when his Edwardian oxfords touched solid ground and everyone all rushed to have the first chance to speak to his lordship, you were more surprised to see him completely ignoring them, parting the crowd as he walked towards…you? Shocked as everyone else, you weren't sure how to respond as he reached out a waiting, gloved hand towards you with a smile, “It’s an honor to make your acquaintance, Doctor.” You were suddenly stricken by the realization that he really was as handsome as all those women said, not to mention charming. Quickly taking his hand, you searched your mind for an appropriate response, “A-An honor? Oh, my Lord- it is a privilege for me to make yours!” There was a look of satisfaction on his face at your social blunder, glancing around at the patrons crowded in the room.

With one hand, he gestured for the large pair of heavy, wooden double doors at the far end of the room and they opened towards the great hall as the Earl glanced over to you with those crystal blue eyes, his voice entirely level, “Walk with me. Let’s talk about those funds for the hospital.” Following at his heels, you felt like a man prostrating himself before a king, “Really, it cannot be understated how much your generous donation means to us, my Lord.” There was something so enamoring about his generosity that just swept you off of your feet. The sounds of the festivities echoed through the empty halls as he showed you around the palace grounds, the suits of armor and sarcophagi and all the other eclectic relics he had collected over the years littering the halls. “Oh, ten thousand pounds is nothing. It’s the least I could give.” There was something about him that made you feel so comfortable in his presence, and you started to let your guard down, just slightly.

“You know, something about you is really quite…familiar. Have you visited St. Thomas’ lately?” Musing, you walked at his side through the grand, tapestry lined halls while you thought back to the faces you regularly saw at the pub, now blurred by alcohol, as if he would ever find himself there. Your eyes wandered towards the skull of an animal you didn’t recognize that sat on a shelf and was being used as a bookend as his expression turned sour like it was an improper thing to suggest, “Oh. I don’t go to hospitals…But” There was this knowing glint in the Earl’s eye as he continued, speaking with a tone that suggested a double entendre, “I’ve spectated on the operating theater in the past, if that’s what you’re asking. I am…morbidly curious about the fragile balance between life and death, myself. I'm sure you could understand, doctor.” Oh, you had no clue. All those nights he spent in the shadow cloaked corner of that pub you so loved to frequent, sitting there with a pint and a rare steak in front of him while you were at the bar, whining about your job to whatever drunk sod was humoring you that night, watching…listening…waiting in anticipation for you to head home for the evening- thinking about the desert that would follow his meal.

The two of you paused in what appeared to be a study. On one end of the room was a large, hand carved wooden fireplace, the mantle of which sat a candlestick holder that, if you had a less keen eye, you wouldn’t have recognized as having been fashioned from a human spine, and a glass vase containing an arrangement of roses, lilies, orchids, and irises, all white and all having seemed to have gone off a while ago. Above the mantle was where your focus was drawn, this large, regal portrait of the Earl, looking all serious and wistful in clothes that cost more than your year’s salary. Fascinated, you turned to study it in awe for a moment, but silently, and unbeknownst to you, the Lord had been carefully observing you in the study, like a hungry wolf watching a rabbit. The proximity of your bodies went completely unnoticed by the Earl in favor of the now exposed patch of skin below your ear. Oh, this was too good. He could practically hear your heartbeat thrumming from where he stood- feel the blood coursing through your veins. It was all so…tempting. Tremoring a little, he had to exercise the highest of restraint not to seize you right there- it would be so easy too, just to wrestle you down onto the velvet chaise lounge you were standing next to and bury his face into the space between your chin and shoulder. Boarding on fantasy, the Earl let himself get lost, imagining the way your squirming and whining would ease up once he’d gotten done lapping up all the warm blood squirting from your wounds. Clearing his throat together, Earl Margera cleared his throat, “We should, um- we should get going. I believe dinner is being served.”

The meal you ate was the height of decadence. Brimming trays of succulent pheasant, rare steaks, and legs of mutton larger than your head ran down the long table in between centerpieces of Nightshade and Lavender, flanked by crisp salads and potatoes with steaming baskets of dinner rolls served with butter and honeycomb, not to mention the assortment of trifles and puddings the waitstaff rushed to the table on ruby red Cape Cod glass platters. It was more food than you had seen in one place in your entire life, and yet you found your attention so drawn to the man sitting at the end of the table- so much so that you hardly cared that your meal was getting cold. He told these grand, winding stories of his world travels that all his suck up guests tried really really hard to be interested in, but you couldn’t help yourself from hanging on every word. Sipping wine from the silver chalice that sat in front of you that always seemed to get topped off when you looked away, it was like your mind was lost in some seductive trance you couldn’t seem to break free from, but you were of sound enough mind to remember quite a few details from that evening. Namely when his Lordship approached you personally and asked you, for the sake of ease of communication, to forgo all the formalities that came with his title, and that he would prefer you call him by his given name, Brandon. More than that, he would like to meet you again- one on one, to further discuss those donations for the hospital. You suggested lunch. He said he would prefer dinner.

There was something so enchanting about the Earl that kept you in high spirits far after your first encounter and well into the next week at work. You must have been quite a sight for any onlookers, seeing a man performing an autopsy with a lovesick smile plastered on his face. Before, you could hardly complete an operation without needing to flee the room halfway through to vomit, but now you had no problem with the whole thing. The waterlogged woman Scotland Yard lugged to your table still had her stockings on as you started the external examination, thinking back to that evening while you examined for physical trauma on the neck and arms. Feeling cold skin under your gloved hand, you recalled that the Earl- sorry, Brandon had made mention of an affinity for Blackcurrant pastilles, which you thought was sweet, though it was strange for a man- wait a moment. Leaning closer, you noticed something- two small, hollow marks on the woman’s neck, as if made by a seven gauge needle.

More disturbing was the resemblance it bore to the very same marks you had been waking up to on your neck. The operating room suddenly felt much quieter than you remembered. Swallowing hard, you took out your clipboard and, with a shaking hand, went to write it down before hesitating. A cold sweat collected on your brow and it was like some instinct inside of you told you not to- it could have been a mole or something- maybe your eyes were playing tricks on you. Yes, that was it, your late nights were catching up to you. Steadying your hand, you put down the pen before reaching for the hand saw that sat at your side and made a mental note to visit the library after work. Maybe you could find some medical textbook that could explain all this away as some biological reaction or benign infection or something reassuring that you missed back in school. You also made note to purchase those pastilles while you were out.

Just as you went to leave work, someone stopped you with a hand on your shoulder, and as you were distracted with thoughts of your dinner that night, you jumped a little at the stern voice of your coworker, “Y/N. Where on earth are you hurrying off to?” Turning to him, you were still a little shaken up as you stammered, pulling your apron off, “Oh! I’m, uh- I’m headed off to dinner.” His expression seemed to soften a little at that, almost looking amused, “A date- is that right? You know, for a second I thought you were off to see somebody else.” Despite his calm words, the look in his eyes gave way to the jealousy sitting just under the surface. You had noticed people at work had been treating you…differently after you went to that party. Even the pat on the back you got from him felt ingenuine as he spoke stiffly, “Well, good luck with your lady friend.”

When you knocked on the double doors of the manor’s entrance dressed in your finest, you suddenly became conscious of the way you smelled of work. Usually, all that it took to get it off was a hot shower, but somehow tonight it seemed to cling to you more than before, but before you could think much of it, a member of the Earl’s council opened the door. He was a young man- well built and tall, with dark hair and eyes obscured by a pair of tinted glasses. He seemed a little too eager to welcome you in, watching you as you stepped through the door, “Oh, you must be the guest Bam was talkin’ about!” Bam? You recalled a mention of it being the childhood nickname of the Earl, but didn’t know his council would address him so informally. The American accent of the man who answered the door struck you as peculiar, but you brushed it off as something else caught your attention. There was a stack maybe a meter high of boxes, all varying sizes, that sat haphazardly tossed next to the door, all addressed from women. Upon further examination, you noticed that they were all boxes of blackcurrant pastilles, just like the ones you brought for the Earl. It was common knowledge that he had quite a few lady admirers, but this seemed excessive.

When you looked up, it seemed your arrival had brought quite a bit of attention to yourself as, from seemingly nowhere, you had attracted a crowd. They must not get a lot of guests around here, you thought, swallowing hard and trying to ignore how you felt like a zebra that had just stumbled into a den of ravenous lions from the way they were staring at you. But just at that moment, that’s when you felt a hand grab yours and quickly tug you away to safety. “Doctor! What a pleasure to see you again.” You couldn’t explain the wave of relief that washed over you when you heard his voice because you didn’t feel that you were in any danger in the first place, but there was some instinct in you that told you otherwise. “Are these for me?” Walking in step with you, Brandon peered curiously at the green silk wrapped box in your hands and you nodded. “You are too kind.” Taking them, he placed them on a table away from the other boxes, and just out of your sight, flipped a crude gesture at his dejected councilmen who were all disappointed they didn’t get to you first.

The Earl seemed more comfortable with you now than he was at your first encounter as he ate with you in the smaller, less formal dining parlor that was shuttered off to most guests. On the table was a more simple but nonetheless impressive meal- a spiced ham, mock turtle soup, Yorkshire pudding, and a treacle tart served with custard. The mahogany dining table was lit by a candelabra, the only light in the room since the heavy, purple velvet curtains were pulled closed. The striking details of his face looked even more alluring in the shadows, refined- like it was chiseled out of alabaster by some great sculptor. Sipping from the black crystal glass in his hand, Brandon raised an eyebrow at you from across the table, “Any stories from the ward, doctor?” Perhaps it was the wine, but the way he addressed you by your title made your heart flutter. Still, you composed yourself, clearing your throat, “Well, in fact, I do. For weeks now, the police have have been discovering these- these bodies in the River Thames,” Hesitating for a moment, you debated if this was appropriate conversation for dinner, but you took the fact he hadn’t stopped you as encouragement to continue, “and I still haven’t been able to deduce the cause of death!” Brandon simply nodded, watching you with half lidded eyes. Using one finger, you gestured towards your neck and continued with a slight tremble in your voice, “The only thing they have in common are these…odd marks that usually sit right above the jugular vein. And get this- I have observed similar marks on myself! I am led to believe I’m the only surviving man in London with these…” You didn’t notice the little glint in the Earl’s eye as you tilted your jaw to the side, revealing how Ecchymosis had painted your skin in these exquisite blossoms of purple and green that were previously hidden under your collar.

“Oh, how odd...” Bam wasn't really listening to you talk, but he did a damn good job at pretending he was looking at you and not just what was throbbing right underneath your skin. Maybe it was the alcohol content, but there was something so intoxicating about your blood, better than any opium or wine or sexual perversion known to his lordship. It was the taste, something far superior to any other human Bam had laid his mouth on- sweeter than dark treacle and richer than custard, an exotic, tender savor only enhanced by the intoxicating aroma that clung to your hair and clothes- that titillating stench of death. Oh, and the way you fought. Your little struggles were so useless- so benign to Bam that they were cute, in the same way a mouse thinks it can escape the jaws of a python by squeaking. You were an absolute feast for the senses. If his mouth never left your neck and the only thing he did all day was to suck from you, he would be the happiest man in the world. Alas, you were both men with careers and people that would notice if they suddenly stopped appearing in public. But that could always change.

Maybe you weren't as sneaky about your drinking habits as you thought you were based on how often the Earl ordered your glass to be refilled. The longer the night went on, the more and more you felt that your inhibitions were slipping away until it was time to leave. Standing up, you were unsteady on your feet and wobbled a bit, lightheaded from the alcohol. Brandon rushed to your side, placing one hand on your waist and his other hand intertwining his fingers with yours to steady you. With how he was holding you so close to his body like one would hold a lover, it was some sort of instinct that led you to lean towards him, pressing your lips together. But he didn’t seem shocked that you kissed him- in fact, the Earl almost seemed pleased as you staggered backwards, flushed as the wine taste of his tongue still lingered on your lips. “Oh my…! I apologize for being so, uh- so forward, sir.” Hushing you softly, his voice was perfectly level as he spoke, taking a step towards you, “There’s no need to apologize, doctor.” Brandon’s gloved fingers met your chin as he gently tilted your head to get you to meet his gaze, “Let’s say this feeling is…mutual.” And he smiled at you- a smile you weren't sure was comforting or predatory. “Now, you should be getting home.”

Bam wanted to kiss you more- from your feet to the tips of your ears, he would worship your body if he got the chance. Delectable in every sense of the word, this doctor was just too good to be true, he thought. This pliant, innocent man was almost literally sticking out his neck to him. Your every action was so perfect, so delicate in the Earl’s eyes, and to put it simply, he was addicted to you. He could drain you completely- gulp down every last ounce of blood you had in you and dump your body in the river like all the others he’d had his fill of, but more than how sinfully delicious you tasted, Bam loved the game- the hunt. Watching you stumble over your own feet as you walked home from his high perch on the roof of the manor, peering out from where he sat on one of the flying buttresses that held up the roof of the manor, Bam licked his lips. You were fun to play with, what with how easily he could make you blush and stammer and just surrender with the slightest of efforts, and more so how you hadn’t a single inkling of suspicion as to how he could sway you so easily. The mingling of saliva and blood may be the highest form of connection in Bam’s eyes, but what he had with you superseded that. And you hadn’t a clue.

They had stopped talking to you at work. You didn’t pay much mind to the glares of the bitter murmurs of ‘lapdog’ and ‘lickfinger’ you caught in the halls of the hospital from people who were once your friends, but even your superiors were avoiding you like the plague. Still, you had bigger things to worry about- those bodies, namely, of whom you had started coming to a conclusion about. After nights in the library spent studying books upon books, there was this creature you had come upon- from China and India and Greece, the walking undead that feasted on the vital essence of human man. Moreso, those marks on the necks of the victims and yes, yours as well, matched up with the scars one may bear after an attack by one of those beasts.

With no more friends to speak of for arbitration, you received your summons in the post: you were needed at the Earl’s manor the next day as he had fallen ill with consumption in the two weeks since your last meeting. More than that, he had requested you by name. Clearly the situation must be dire, given his lordship’s distaste for hospitals and the fact many people see surgeons such as yourself as a last resort, saved for only the most grim circumstances. There was something in you that made you nervous at the thought of seeing him again that you couldn’t explain, like how a maiden may feel about seeing her suitor. Perhaps it was just nerves, or you were just unsure about being the sole person responsible for saving the life of such an influential, wealthy man. Perhaps.

If you thought the Margera Manor looked impressive from the bottom of the hill it sat on, you were absolutely gobsmacked when you looked at it head on, and if you didn’t know any better you would’ve thought you were entering a cathedral, what with all the pointed windows and spires. Your steps echoed on the stone terrace as you looked around at the garden, now far less cheery as fall had stolen the green from the trees and plants, leaving them skeletons that were perfecting roosting places for crows whose loud caws made you jump as you went to knock. The front door was…unlocked, swinging open under your slight nudge. Dressed in the extent of protective garb with your leather bound medical kit in tow, you crept into the seemingly empty mansion and realized just how empty it felt without some party or dinner to fill the halls. Sure, the knives of this and masks of that the Earl had picked up in his travels still hung on the walls, and the opaline glass oil lamps in the hall were still lit, but there was something profoundly empty about the manor. Slowly walking the wooden staircase, past the large portrait paintings that hung on the walls, you made your way upstairs.

“Hello, sir…?” Slipping through the Earl’s bedroom door, you expected the worst of consumption- open sores, weeping lesions, coughing up blood mucus, etcetera, but even from across the room the worst symptom you could discern was a light sweat on his brow. Sure, he was deathly pale, but he was always that pale, and you recalled the darkness around his eyes as having been there from your first meeting. Lit only by the red silk lamp in the far corner of that room that smelled of clove and patchouli, he looked rather beautiful for a man, almost fragile- but nothing like the people on death’s door that you saw at the hospital. Brandon’s half lidded eyes met your and he coughed slightly, his voice raspy and weak, “Doctor.” Moving to his bedside, you placed your leather case of medical instruments on the nearby table next to a small stack of Penny-Dreadfuls that sat there and helped him to sit upright with your hands under his arms. “What sort of symptoms have you been experiencing as of late?” There was this odd feeling that came over you as you touched his bare torso that you couldn’t place as your eyes scanned over him, fixating on the strange design that sat low on his hips, right where the silk linens pooled around him- a tattoo of sorts? The swirling, dark ink was beautiful, drawing your eyes to his Apollo's belt.

“I am just…terribly famished.” Brandon sighed under your touch, and as you continued feeling his skin under your fingertips, that’s when you noticed something- he was cold. Deathly cold, and his body bore no evidence of the telltale wasting consumption brought on. Disturbed, your eyes went wide but you made no other mention of it as you reached into your bag and retrieved your stethoscope. Be professional. Tend to the patient. But as you pressed the circular end to the left side of the Earl’s chest, you were shocked to hear…nothing. The lack of mucus in his lungs did not shock you nearly as much as the complete absence of a heartbeat. The only sound in the room was Brandon’s soft breathing as he studied you, expectantly leaning over your hands as you worked. Watching. Waiting.

You doubted it at first. It seemed the stuff of fairytales, that the Earl could be something other than human, but it was all consistent with the lore you had been reading up on. Part of you was curious about him- after all, you dealt in the morbid, so it made sense for a scientific mind such as yourself to find his case fascinating. But on the other hand, it chilled you to the bone to know that this man you had been growing so close to, could be some sort of monster- some creature that delighted in feeding on the blood of men. You cursed yourself for not realizing this sort of thing sooner as a chill ran through your bones at the situation your trusting nature had gotten yourself into. Quivering, and against all your better judgment, you slowly looked up to meet his hungry, nearly salivating gaze.

And before you could think to react, he grabbed you by the shoulders and you were underneath him, back pressed against the bed. Heart nearly thumping out of your chest, your body was caged in, absolutely captured by the Earl’s as he leaned over you and in your mind there was absolutely no doubt of his intentions. Warm breath gracing your skin, his too sharp canines grazing against where sensitive nerves and thick, tender arteries run just below the skin felt so tantalizing, but Bam hesitated. Why aren't you fighting? In all his fantasies about this exact moment, you would be writhing about like a scared and wounded animal right about now, all squealing and wriggling and begging for him to oh please please spare you, but you were entirely willing, perfectly still and silent save for the swell of your breathing. However, the promise of satiating his hunger was just too alluring and he couldn’t not resist, sinking his teeth into you anyways. Your breath hitching in your throat, this foul, sweet smell rose up from where his fangs had visceraly penetrated you and Bam nearly moaned at the exquisite taste of the sanguine amber that trickled slow and thick from you. Hemorrhaging there, all tangled up in the red silk sheets of the Lord’s bed and, in addition, entirely sober, you couldn’t escape the realization that this actually felt somewhat…enjoyable. In fact, you really could get used to this. Eyes glazing over, you stifled a groan at the feeling of him flicking the tip of his tongue against one of the little dribbling slits as you began to teeter on that romantic, presyncopic border between consciousness and sleep, limbs tingling while you slowly drifted off into twilight.

You blinked awake in that very same four post baldachin bed with a distinct chill which you would come to attribute to the wide opened double doors of the Earl’s balcony. Long, white marquisette curtains billowed in the night as the moonlight cascaded in so brilliantly. Silhouetted by the moon’s opalescent glow, there he stood- naked and beautiful. Sensing your stirring, Bam turned toward you, the toned muscles of his back flexing as he studied your expression. Slowly, he approached where you lay, looking down at you with those piercing blue eyes as he stood at your bedside. “Ah, my prince is awake.” There was a distinct tone of amusement in his voice as he spoke to you with newfound affection. Sensing your apprehension as you looked up at him with those wide eyes, Bam sighed, reaching a hand out towards you in an empathetic gesture, “I’ve been in your shoes before, Y/N. I know exactly how you feel.” Gently, very gently, he caressed your cheek fondly as he mused. “You have…nothing. Life has no meaning anymore, does it?” You shook your head and the Earl smiled. “I can fix that.” Leaning down closer to you, he spoke low, in a voice as smooth as whiskey and just as sweet, “Would you like me to?” And you nodded.

[ghostxpup]

Next Contestant (Bam’s Version) Bam Margera x F!reader!

warnings: Fighting and my bad grammar lol.

requests for the jackass guys are always open!

You were currently at some shitty bar in West Chester with Bam and all his friends after a long day of filming for Viva la bam. 

You were currently at the bar next to Bam practically sitting on his lap. Bam whispers in your ear “I’ll be back babe just going to the bathroom” he says while kissing your cheek. You sit at the bar watching Bam’s friends be loud, you notice a group of guys you have never seen before come walking into the bar and right next to you. You sigh softly and hope they don’t start something..

One of the guys moves close to you, his hand moving to your lower back. “Hey beautiful, can I buy you a drink?” He chuckles into your ear. You ignore him and try to get away but his grip tightens and his friends are all staring at you. 

You suddenly heard a voice behind you “Hey asshole, is that your hand on my girlfriend?” The guy doesn’t do anything, just moves you closer to him.

The anger in Bam’s chest was growing. He grabbed the guy and threw him to the floor and kicked him in the stomach a few times hard. Ryan pulls Bam away after a few minutes. Bam comes and sits next to you pulling you on his lap. “Everybody here keeps staring” I whisper to Bam. 

Bam chuckles “Don’t worry they’ll get what they deserve if they try anything with you” 

[welcometojackass2022]

Taking Commissions—Personalized and Kink/Fetish Fics for $10-$15

Figured I’d go ahead and make this official! I’m currently taking commissions. For $10 I’ll write you a personalized smut fic that will be similar to my x reader fics except instead of the reader, you get to choose the name, personality traits and characteristics of the main character; you can use yourself, an OC, anything you want as specifically detailed as you want. You can also choose to have another canon character or person used instead of yourself or an OC (for example, a Harry Potter x Draco Malfoy fic instead of a Harry Potter x Reader fic). I’m also taking commissions for hardcore kink and fetish fics for $15, which can also be personalized upon request. Continue reading for more details!

Fandoms I Take Commissions For:

Jackass (Johnny Knoxville, Dave England, Danger Ehren, Chris Pontius, Steve-O, Bam Margera, Ryan Dunn, Wee Man, Preston Lacy, Stephanie Hodge, Jeff Tremaine, Spike Jonze, Rachel Wolfson, Poopies, Zach Holmes, Jasper Dolphin, Eric Manaka)

Viva La Bam and CKY (Bam, Ryan, Brandon DiCamillo, Rake Yohn, Raab Himself/Chris Raab), Brandon Novak, Tim Glomb, Lord Bottaro, Joe Frantz, Jess Margera, Chad Ginsburg, Deron Miller, Ryan Gee)

Game of Thrones (too many characters to list, just ask upon request)

Harry Potter (pretty much any character, just ask upon request)

Gotham (most characters, just ask upon request)

Shameless (most characters, just ask upon request)

Jimmy Pop and Evil Jared from Bloodhound Gang

Ville Valo from HIM

Any character from Haggard or Minghags

The Mighty Boosh (Vince, Howard, Naboo)

Peep Show (Mark and Jeremy)

IT Crowd (Moss, Jen, Roy, Douglas, Richmond)

Peaky Blinders (most characters, just ask upon request)

Slipknot (all members)

Pretty much any rock band, including Guns N Roses, Motley Crue, and KISS (check my old account @creativewritingpracticestudio for some of my old rock band fics)

Pretty much any British comedian featured on Would I Lie To You, Taskmaster, Big Fat Quiz, 8 Out of 10 Cats, 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown, and Mock the Week

Dead Poets Society (any of the main guys honestly, I’m not picky)

Inbetweeners (most main characters and Mr. Gilbert)

Umbrella Academy (most main characters, ask upon request)

Types of Personalized Fics I’ll Write ($10 Per Fic, $15 if Hardcore Kinks and Fetishes are involved)

Fluff

Smut (angry smut, fluffy smut, jealous smut, anything really)

Angst

Hurt/Comfort

Song fics

Drabbles or short concepts

M/F, M/M, F/F, anything goes

Types of Hardcore Kinks and Fetishes I’ll Write For ($15 Per Fic)

Hardcore BDSM (bondage, dom/sub dynamics, mild pain play, punishments, use of gags, sex toys, and bondage gear, etc)

Consensual Non-Consent

Somnophilia

Piss kink, piss play, bladder control, etc

DDLG/MDLB and all variations, but no pedophilia.

Blood Kink and/or weapon play

Roleplay

Breeding Kink and Pregnancy Kink

Belly Kink/Weight Gain Kink (this does include feederism and force-feeding)

Cucking, Threesomes, Sharing, Free Use, Cheating Kink, etc

Degradation and Humiliation (and on the opposite end, Praise Kink and Body Worship)

Impact Play and Mild Pain Play

Foot Fetish

Exhibitionism and Voyeurism

Wax Play and Temperature Play

Tentacles (yeah sure, why not)

Inflation (I highly doubt anyone’s gonna request this but it’s there as an option)

Note: Extremely gross fetishes like scat, farting, armpits, etc are a possibility but you’ll have to make a pretty decent offer, definitely more than $15. Pedophilia, Bestiality, and kinks involving explicit torture/mutilation or murder are out, no matter what you offer.

Please note that all requests for these fics need to either be sent to me in DMs or through a non-anonymous ask (the ask won’t be posted, it’ll just tell me who to DM to send the link to the fic or to ask questions about the fic). Once the fic is completed, I’ll ask you to send the $10 or $15 through Venmo, PayPal or CashApp (preferably Venmo but it’s your choice) and I’ll either send you the link to the document the fic is written on or email you the PDF of the fic. You can also choose to have me post the fic on ao3 and just not state who requested said fic. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, I don’t kinkshame or judge and I like to be given as many details as possible to ensure that you get the fic you want.

Also, don’t feel obligated to ask for a commission if you’re one of the people who reads my x reader fics! This is just a way for me to earn some money while I’m in college, I will never demand that any of you ask for a commission. Happy requesting :)

[tommyboykaulitz]

DSS(F)

Bam Margera x Reader Smut

fem reader, or@! fem/rec, the goods(ifykyk)

DSS(F)

“D! S! S! EFFFFFFFFFF!” I yell, walking into the living room. Bam shoots up and cheers with me, leaving the guys on the couch still. Steve-O and Dunn get up, not knowing what their cheering about but following us to the car. It’s 11pm and we’re just now leaving the house. 

“Hey man I hate to burst your bubble but,” he turns the music down “what the hell is DSSF?”

“It’s kinda just a fun way we can blow off steam every night. Buttttt, we ain’t spillin’. Y’all gots to find out yourselves.” I pull into the parking lot of our favorite little bar. Just a nice bar with some country music, no house music and sweaty bodys flopping around the floor.

“Ahh man this place blows man, why don’t we go down to Karma real quick.” Dunn begs Bam, slamming his last can of beer. 

“Nah man I’m not messing up DSSF, we don’t get F every night I’m not risking it.” Bam says slapping my ass as he runs by. 

“FUCK YOU BAM!” I say laughing as I punch him. We walk in and I send them all to get us a table while I get some beers and shots. 

“Damn little lady!” Bam shouts pulling me into his lap biting down on my shoulder as I bring the beers. I hand out there beers, using my belt buckle to open them all. 

We pound back 4,6,8 beers each before paying,”Ok whose buying?” I ask almost slumped over Bams arm. 

“Wait you weren’t buying?” Steve-O asks, dropping a bottle off the table. 

“Nah man, fuck.” I whip off Bams hat and put my card in there,” Alright everyone put your cards in.” I shuffle the hat around reach in and pull out a card,”Dave…Dave?”

“Oh yeah man we traided cards the other day, forgot to get mine back.” Dunn says, reaching for Daves card. 

I pull the card back, standing back from the table, “Alright thank you Dave…I guess?”

••••••••••••••••••••

We all fall back in line, loading back up into my van before continuing to D’S’SF. “Okaaay, RIGHT! LEFT! LEFT! STOP!” Bam was shouting random directions to get to the place. “This…this is it man.”

“Fuck baby,” I say, getting out of the van with him, standing on the side of this big ass hill. Overlooking the city, we had only been visiting so we never saw New York from this angle. “It’s gorgeous.” 

“Does the S stand for suicide? What the hell are we doing here?” Dunn askes stumbling over Steve-O. 

“Calm down man, we gotta set it up.” I pull open the side door on the van and started pulling the couch away from the wall.”BAM! HELP ME!” I yell, ready to sit down again. We get the couch out and we all get comfy. I jump up and run to my glove compartment. “Y’all readyy???”

I sit back down beside Bam before he pulls me up onto his lap. I put the bong between Bams legs as I load a bowl, making sure I don’t drop anything.”Ladies and gent,” I say, noddin my head to Bam “May I present to you, the first S of the night.” I snatch the lughter out of Bams pocket, seductively. Taking the biggest rip I ever had. 

Passing it around the circle. I grab the speaker from the passanger seat and start playing HIM. 30 minutes go by and we end up getting cold so we get a little bit more high.(…6 more bowls) We loaded up the couch back into the van. 

•••••••••••••••••••••

We had been driving around for maybe an hour before we found the place. “Y’all ready for the last letter of the night?” 

“Fuck this man can’t we go out to eat? I got the muchies bad.” Dunn begs. 

“No man, I’ll drop you off at home after this. Grab your boards.” As we get out we walk up to this abandoned hotel I had checked out earlier. “Be quiet, listen to me. Lay low, don’t break anything, single file.”

“What the he-“ Bam stops midsentence watching me run across the yard into the gates. I wave someone over and Bam sends Steve-O, Ry, and then himself. 

“What are we doing yk?” Steve-O askes. 

“Just follow me, we should be good now.” I run inside the building. An old familiar hotel I would stay in as a child, on the rare occasions we’d come here. “It’s the same way I remember it,” no decay, no damage, everything the exact same. I drop my board down and start skating around the halls, until I found it. The pool. 

I sneak in flip on some flashlights and drop in. Thank god it was empty, I had never seen it full. The guys follow in and drop in with me. “Fuck man, where’d you find this place.”

“My mom used to live here, I’d get to visit her every now and then.” I scream, continuing around the bowl. About 2 hours pass and everyones getting tired. “Everyone get in the car.” I demand to the fallen boys. 

••••••••••••••••••••

“Are you ready?” Bam asks, the guys sleeping on the couch mumbling. 

“Yesss, lemme get these kids home.” I say making the turn as sharp as possible ontk their street.

“What the fuck man?!” 

“Shut up and go inside Dunn.” I drive off and we get home around 5am. Bam runs around the car grabbing me out of my seat and wrapping my legs around him. He tightens his grip around my thighs as he carries me into the house. He sets me down and we makeout as we rush to the bedroom, thrusting each others on the walls on our way. 

Bam pushes me back onto the bed as he pulls my pants down, revealing my black lacy thong he loved. I grab him on both sides of his face, leading him up to my lips, pulling his shirt off him and kissing his neck as he does the same. Kissing all down my neck, chest, stomach, ending on the inside of my thighs. Wrapping his fingers around my underwear as he pulls them off me. 

He kisses me, before wrapping his tongue around my clit. Sucking as he inserts two fingers inside me. I gasp as I get comfortable around his fingers. He curls them as he licks all around my clit, squeezing my boobs with his other hand. “Ffu-uck” I moan pushing his head down more, wanting him more than I had him. He speeds up his pace as I moan and groan. Twitch and shake from the pleassure. Then he stops, causing this lingering feeling of emptiness. 

He crawls up the bed as he plants kisses all over my body. Kissing my lips before sucking all over my neck. I slowly reach down and palm his boner before unbuckling his pants, exposing his red hot dick. He didn’t have the biggest dick but he knew how to use it. “Spit.” Holding his hand out under my mouth, I do. He reaches his hand down before running it up and down his dick before lining himself up with me. 

He slowly pushes the tip inside of me before he starts to pick up the pace. Thrusting harder each time. He leans down to my neck again as I run my hands up and down his back, loving the amount of pleassure I feel with him. I had never felt it with anyone else. I moan load in his ear and he thrust harder, going faster each time. Everytime I forget how good he is. He how everytime I see him naked my lust for him grows…and it never dies. “Fuuuuck,” I moan. We both know whats coming He picks up the pace even more and plays with my clit with his thumb until we both reach our high. 

The thrusts slow down and he rolls over, “Damn baby, that was definitely your best,” I chuckle shoving him away “stay here. Let me get you cleaned up.” I see his back as he walks to the bathroom. 

I crawl off the bed following him to the bathroom. “Fuck baby, I fucked you up.” 

He turns in the mirror to see his newly scar painted back. Laughing as he pulls me in for a kiss.

END

I’m going to be real. DSS(F) was inspired by GTL(Gym Tan Laundry) from Jersey Shore

[philscoupons]

who i’ll write for/what i’ll write:

jackass:

johnny knoxville steve-o bam margera ryan dunn chris pontius dave england ehren mcghehey wee man preston jasper poopies zach cky/viva la bam: raab himself dico rake yohn

what i’ll write:

headcanons one-shots smut/fluff/angst x m!reader x gn!reader x transmale!reader x f!reader

[knchins]

C, F, X, Y, Z 💗

bby 🥺 

C. what fandom(s) did you start writing?

My very first fandom work was....very embarrassing. It was actually Viva la Bam because I was so enamored with Bam Margera and his antics. The first anime I wrote for was Naruto. Back when people actually liked OCs and preferred them to readers.This was all circa 2004-2005.

F. canon fics or au?

My tastes have changed so much over the years. I used to strictly read/write canon. But as I get older I tend to have a huge soft spot for AUs. So I’m gonna have to go with AU for this one, but I LOVE a good canon fic.

X. give a summary of your current project!

These can all be found on my WIP page! I currently have six projects in the works.

Y. what is the title of your current wip?

The current WIPs that have titles are: Canary (Oikawa x OC), Diary of a Vagabond (Chuuya x OC), Feline Affinity (Aizawa x OC), Come Home (Toshinori x Reader), Fox Fire (Miya Twins x Reader). I have on untitled Shinsou WIP!

Z. how to you feel about your wip compared to other works of yours?

The long fics I”m so far really proud of: Canary and DoaV. Feline Affinity I think has a lot of great potential so I’m excited to get back to working on it too. My one shots are REALLY hit or miss with my followers so its really hard to gauge. Any time I’m proud of one it flops. Any time I think it’s mediocre it does really well. I try not to have much judgement on them now.

Fanfic Author Asks!

[asskickedbygirl]

The Johnny elevator smut was so hot omg. Can I request a smut with a fem reader where Bam’s having a bad day and he’s super frustrated so the reader kind of lets him take it out on her by having rough sex and then it’s fluffy at the end? Thank youuu

Release

[Bam Margera x F!Reader]

Desc: anon covered it!

A/n: glad you enjoyed going up!!! icl i do enjoy writing bam smut even tho this is kind of out of fic character but i do love dom x reader sometimes

warnings: smut (18+), p in v, sub/dom dynamics, use of safe word

1.9k words

⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ 

“Fuck!” 

You heard a yell from the yard. Looking out the window you saw Bam slamming his board down on the ground, angry expression on his face. You observed the way he kicked it and mumbled incomprehensible things under his breath, unbeknownst to the fact you were watching him from a few feet away. 

Bam was already pissed given the fact some asshole MTV exec had cut an entire episode of Viva La Bam, claiming it was “too vulgar for television”, as the email stated. You had to restrain him from writing a fairly strongly worded one back which only ticked him off more, resulting in him heading outside to skate though not even that was putting his mind at ease, only enraging him even further.

‘He’s quite hot when he’s angry.’ You thought, eyes drinking in his slim frame that was littered with tattoos.

You and Bam weren’t a thing, you guys were just friends. Well, friends that had quite a bit of pent up sexual tension. The feelings were only rising, perhaps even bursting, ready to be released. Released.

Bam pushed his hair off of his forehead, panting and glaring at the ground where his board lay when he glanced up to meet your stare from the dining room window. You didn’t look away immediately, instead prolonging the eye contact a little longer, a tiny smirk playing at your lips. Bam tore his eyes away, confused on why he was flustered all of a sudden but deciding to head back inside anyways.

“Hey.” You spoke as he shut the sliding doors with vigour.

“What are you still doing here?”

How polite.

“Dico said we’re watching a movie later, no point heading home.”

“Yeah well I’m not hanging out.” 

And with that, he was out the door, stomping up to his room, only enticing you to follow him.

Your fist tapped lightly at the door.

“I said I’m not hanging out.” He wasn't yelling, but it was clear he wasn’t exactly very happy either. 

You opened the door despite his protests, leading Bam to glare at you as he put on a fresh shirt.

“What’s your problem?!” He spat.

“I don't think I’m the one with the problem.”

“Can't you just fuck off? I’m already pissed about those fucking assholes in suits, do you want me to be pissed at you too?!”

“Well about that.” 

Bam narrowed his brows as you walked closer to him, hands behind your back.

“I have an idea.” 

Bam looked you up and down, completely clueless as to what you were going to suggest but still hoping deep down it would be what his dreams entailed. 

“Why don’t you take your anger out on me?”

“What like fucking yell at you or something?” 

He wasn't catching on, you smirked.

“No, not exactly.”

You stepped forward, slightly closing the gap between the two of you, seductive eyes looking into his. You lifted your arms up to wrap around Bam’s neck, his breath hitching and cheeks flushing at the close contact.

“Other ways.” You whispered.

“So you want me to fuck you?”

You smiled at the frankness, moving your face closer so your lips were brushing his, just about. 

“Well I know you've wanted me for a while, and I’ve wanted you too, and you’re angry. What better way to release than to fuck my brains out?” 

“Are you fucking with me?” Bam’s voice was low and shaky, unsure.

You leaned in and pressed your lips into his, grabbing his chin as you did so before pulling his face away, his eyes forcing back open. 

“What do you think?” 

Bam slammed his lips back onto yours, his hands already grabbing at your hips to pull you flush against his body, mouths and teeth clashing the rougher he went. You let him push you onto his bed, his hands already unbuckling his belt with desperate speed. 

“You want me to take everything out on you I fucking will. Take your clothes off.”

Despite your previous mannerisms of being all confident and domineering, this power shift sent vibrations down to your core, excited that Bam was already willing to take the reins and fuck you as hard as you both needed. You swiftly removed your shirt and shimmied your pants down your legs, leaving you in just your underwear. Bam had his hand down his boxers, shirtless and pumping himself to get hard, watching you splayed out on the bed for him. 

“I said take your fucking clothes off.” He spat lowly, a completely new personality taking over.

It dawned on you he meant your underwear and so you slowly bent your arm around to unclasp your bra, letting it fall forward to reveal your tits.

“Hurry the fuck up.”

Bam had no intentions of enjoying this show you were putting on, instead lurching forward to rip your panties off, throwing the ruined pair on the ground and pushing his fingers inside of you with no warning.

You let out a surprised moan, jolting up to rest on your elbows as his index and middle worked in and out of you at a rapid pace, your body convulsing as it adapted to the sudden pleasure.

“Give me a safe word.” Bam said, not giving up on working you up.

Your head had lulled back, too dazed out from his movements to understand what he had said until he stopped, fingers pulling straight out of you. 

“Give me a safe word or I stop.”

“Oklahoma.” is all you said before you felt Bam’s warm spit drip onto your cunt, fingers dipping into your folds.

You let out a breathy moan as he slipped inside of you once again, thumb pushing against your clit while his other hand gripped your waist to make you hold still. Your back arched as Bam’s finger began making curling upwards, hitting the spot you needed him to, your legs beginning to close.

“Keep them fucking open.” 

Bam used the hand that had been holding your waist to force your thighs open, thumb pressing into the soft flesh as you continued to squirm. As you were brought closer and closer to the edge, he removed his fingers abruptly, a string of his spit and your slick coating them. You let out a disappointed whimper from the lack of contact but it was quickly hushed by Bam’s wet fingers being shoved in your mouth. You moaned against them, sucking lightly to taste yourself on them. Bam removed them shortly, kicking his boxers off and clambering on top of you, hard dick pressing into your thigh.

“You wanted me to use you right?”

You nodded, eyes looking into his with lust-filled wonder. 

“Get on your hands and knees then.”

You bit your lip and complied, doggy style wasn't something you were used to but you were more than willing to partake in it if it meant hot dom Bam. Bam sat back on his knees as you moved into position, lining up with your core as soon as you were ready. He pushed into you quickly, barely giving a moment to adjust before he was slamming into you, hips snapping. He brought his hand to wrap around your throat, pulling you up by it so your ass could press firmly against him as he fucked you, the feeling still sore. 

“This what you wanted? This feel fucking good?” Bam was panting, rough fucking wearing him out already.

You struggled to respond with his tight hand squeezing your throat ever so lightly but lord did he feel good. Bam let go of your neck then, your face plummeting forward into the pillows that muffled your moans. He moved his hands to your hips, grabbing them and pulling you back towards him as he continued to move his hips at the fastest pace you’d ever been fucked.

As you left your face to press into the soft linen to suppress your noises, Bam wrapped his hand in your hair, tugging you up and moving his torso forward to speak into your ear. 

“I said, does this feel good?” He whispered sternly, the low voice sending shivers down your spine. 

“Y- Yes.” You whined out, mind fogging from the pleasure. 

“Fucked out already.” He laughed almost sadistically, hips not letting up as he dropped your hair, pushing the side of your face into the mattress. 

“Fuck those fucking fuckers in suits.” He babbled incoherently, laying out all of his frustrations onto you as he fucked you. 

“Do you want my cum inside of you?” 

Your face was being held down by Bam’s strong hand but you could hear his question still. You nodded, eyes screwed shut, nearing your orgasm as well.

“Fucking come for me first then. Need to feel that cunt tighten.”

You moaned as the vulgar words poured from his mouth, his fingers wrapping around to attack your clit. You lifted your head from where Bam had shoved you down after his hand moved, stifling your moans with the back of your own hand. 

“No, no. Lemme hear you. It turns me on.” Bam grasped your hair again, pulling you up to force you to let out your noises. 

You were at the edge almost immediately what with Bam’s fingers moving at such a vigorous pace.

“I’m gonna come.” You exclaimed in a moan, eyes beginning to water. 

Bam responded with nothing, only fucking you harder as you came around him, letting out the most pornographic moan you had ever heard yourself release, tears running down your cheek.

“Fuck yeah. You’re so fucking tight.”

Bam’s hand dropped from your core but his fucking never let up. In fact, his free hand could now resume its place on your hips, allowing him to shove you back on his cock even harder. You were insanely sensitive given the fact you had came just seconds previous and Bam’s speed was becoming too much to bear.

“Bam, slow- slow down.” You whimpered as he let go of your hair, head lulling forward. 

“What was that? I can't hear you.” Bam mocked, clearly no sympathy to be had.

“It’s too much. Please just-”

“Safe word or I keep going.”

You paused. Although the overstimulation was hard to deal with, nothing in you wanted Bam to stop his movements and so you stayed silent.

“That's what I thought. Take it like a slut.”

Despite his cocky remarks, Bam’s hips were beginning to stutter and his thrusts were at a more erratic pace. He was close.

“Gonna come in your pretty little cunt. You want that?”

You nodded through moans as the overstimulation turned to just stimulation. Bam squeezed your hips tightly, his thumbs sure to leave bruises as he dragged you down all the way, burying himself deep inside of you as he came with a load groan. You whimpered as you felt him release, finally release. 

Bam pulled out of you shortly after but still held you up, bending down to examine his cum that started to leak out of you. 

“Fucking beautiful.” He whispered as he pushed a finger inside of you again before you swatted your hand back.

“Enough, jesus enough.”

Bam laughed and complied, letting your body drop to lie on your side, your cheeks a bright red. He smiled as he moved closer to your face, planting a kiss on your lips.

“You good? I didn't go too far or anything did I?” 

You shook your head, kissing him back. 

“Just what I wanted. You feel better?” 

He nodded back, wiping the wetness off your cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. 

“Gotta do that more often.” He grinned and so did you.

End.

@gnarkillknoxville @steve-osahottie @izzaaaaaa @jackassvivalabam03 @bambammargera @spoookyberry @jackussy420 @lovexjoe

[asskickedbygirl]

I would die for a bam x reader enemies to lovers where they’re both pro skaters and she’s like super cool and gnarly and dirty and he can’t stand her but it’s because he’s so attracted to her and pretty much jealous of anybody who gets to breath in her direction

Green-Eyed Monster [Bam Margera x F!Reader]

Desc: You’re a featured skater on Tony’s latest tour and get along with everyone perfectly fine. Well everyone except pretty boy Bam Margera and you’re sure there’s a reason for it.

A/n: been thinking about this request for a while and figured it would be a perfect opportunity to write kinda dom reader for once… ik anon didn’t say smut but my mind went crazy on this idea so… enjoy! also just pretend there was a tony tour with tim idek if there was it’s kinda hard to research…

Warnings: smut (18+), p in v, masturbation, public sex, angst, hate fuck, smoking

2.4k words

⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒

You liked to think you were pretty down to earth. Your humour was always dry and you were mean to anyone who was your friend and maybe even mean to anyone who wasn’t. You got along well with most people, in fact you had made a lot of new friends on Tony’s skate tour he had invited you on. You and Make Vallely got on like a house on fire and Tony was basically your mentor. You had also gotten pretty close with Tim O’Connor but you couldn’t lie, you thought he was pretty cute. The only dude on the bus who didn’t succumb to your boyish charms was none other than MTV pretty boy Bam Margera. He complained about your lack of care for your appearance, made crude comments on your skating and would never let you get a word in without berating you for something you said. And so you decided you didn’t like him either, making living in close quarters pretty awkward for the rest of the gang. Bam would spit something nasty at you and you would snap back, teasing him, a vicious cycle that went on and on.

You stood outside of the tour bus at the gas station, lighting up your cigarette and inhaling it, groaning when you saw the asshole approaching you. “And you wonder why your breath stinks.” He muttered, pulling his own pack of smokes out as well. You rolled your eyes, “Just come out here to yell at me or do you want something? Hmm?” You took another drag as Bam glared at you. “Got a light?” He asked, cigarette between his teeth. You rolled your eyes and took out your zippo, reluctantly lighting it for him through gritted teeth. “My Mom used to tell me if boys were mean to me it meant they had a crush on me.” You teased, making Bam scoff. “I’m sure she told you you were pretty too.” His words could’ve cut you like daggers but they were drenched with dishonesty. You knew you were pretty, pretty enough to pull any of the guys on the tour bus. Bam was just kidding himself. You laughed, taking one last inhale of your cigarette before dropping it and stomping its remnants into the tarmac. “You know if you’re really this pent up, just jerk off in the bathroom like I do with Tim.” You winked before getting back on the bus, Bam merely rolling his eyes at you.

No you weren’t fucking Tim, but the shameless flirting seemed to tick Bam off even more than anything else you did. You’d be skating with Tim and he’d grab you every time you went past him, giggling at his touchiness. Meanwhile, Bam was glaring at you through heavy lids, slamming his board down as if he’d fucked up a trick. While signing decks, Tim would slip his arm over your shoulder or mess up your hair on purpose and Bam would ‘accidentally’ shove into the two of you. It was worst of all when you and Tim would be having quiet conversations in the middle of the night across bunks and Bam would loudly tell the two of you to ‘shut the fuck up.’ and then would release a string of curses until you shut the curtains and succumbed to sleep. For a while you couldn’t understand why he had such a vendetta against you, well specifically you and Tim but you quickly realised the cause. He was jealous. It became so obvious then, every second you spent with Tim his resentment grew and his anger elevated. You rarely saw him smile by the time Tim got touchy with you and you seemed more couple-y than usual. You decided to use this to your advantage. He was kinda hot after all.

You spent the day skating in a massive indoor park with the whole gang. Tony was attempting some crazy trick while the rest of you just messed around. Tim stood behind you on the board at one stage, holding your waist as you laughed, trying to skate with two people. Bam was pissed now, grumbling that he was gonna take a piss to Mike and stomping off in a huff. Nows your chance. You told Tim you’d be right back and so followed Bam to the men’s room. Once you entered behind him you quietly locked the door before biting your lip. Bam glanced over his shoulder as he pissed, trying to take a look at who was behind him but groaning when he saw it was you. “What the fuck are you doing in the Men’s freak?!” You smiled before hoisting yourself up on the slightly grimey counter, swinging your legs childishly. “Thought you might want company.” He muttered some grievances as he tucked his dick back in his pants, not letting you take a peek. “I’m fucking out of here.” He went to head out but you kicked your leg out, barricading him from exiting. “No, talk to me.” He gave you a dirty look while your calf still pressed into his stomach. “What the fuck do you want then?” You frowned, “You didn’t wash your hands.” He scoffed, a common quirk of his. “My dick isn’t minging, thanks.” “Well you don’t know that.” He rolled his eyes. “You’re sitting on the sink anyways.” You took your bottom lip into your mouth and lifted yourself up, bringing your legs around the sink so the faucet was right in front of your heat.

He looked up at you, his eyes judging as hard as possible but you could tell there was a hint of excitement buried under them. You smiled, eyes glimmering with lust. “What the fuck are you doing?” He spat and you shot him a look of false confusion. “What do you mean? You can wash your hands now!” You leaned back against the mirror to angle your hips more forward teasingly. Bam rolled his eyes and gave in to your little scheme, turning it on and rubbing the liquid soap into his palm. You moaned quietly, laughing through it “Wow Margera, you really know how to please a woman!” You teased, referencing the obvious innuendo between your legs. He turned the stream off and rolled his eyes at you. “What are you playing at?” You grinned again, then tilted your head and presented fake puppy dog eyes. “Why do you hate me so much.” He scoffed once again. “I don’t hate you. I just don’t really like you.” You raised a brow. “Or do you just hate me with Tim?” He rolled his eyes with even more exaggeration than ever before. “You’re delusional.” You pouted, “Am I? Or do you just not want him to fuck me?” You saw some scarlet creep onto Bam’s cheeks as he acted like you were crazy. “What the fuck are you even talking about?” You pushed yourself forward a little more so your heat was pressed against the faucet through the fabric of your cargos, touching your clit lightly. “Think about it. If me and Tim start fucking all you’re gonna hear at night is-“ You began mimicking being fucked, your hips snapping against the faucet and your face contorted with fake pleasure. You moaned pornographically, “Oh fuck Tim!” You slammed your hand against the counter. “Right there, right there!”

Bam slapped his hand against your mouth, ceasing your movements and noises. “What the fuck are you doing?!” He looked disgusted, a fake disgust disguising his real feelings. You smiled, “Oh sorry, Am I getting you hard?” You murmured beneath his palm before he removed it, wiping it on his shirt. “Yeah it makes sense now see? If Tim fucks me good and I’m real nice and loud right above you on the bunk, you’re gonna get hard. And then what are you gonna do?” Bam was embarrassingly red now, arousal clouding his mind. “Or…” You began, leaning your torso forward so your face was closer to his. “You wanna be the one fucking me.” Bam pushed your chest back so you were against the mirror once more. “The fuck has gotten into you?” You pouted sarcastically, “Not you.” He poked his tongue into the side of his cheek as you leaned forward again, hand snaking up to hold his face, he didn’t stop you. “Tell me you want me.” You whispered, eyes locking into his, only inches apart. He tried to maintain his disgusted expression but it was faltering quickly, his confidence dissipating as he swallowed the lump in his throat. “I don’t want you.” You smiled and leaned into him, your lips just brushing his. You felt him lean in closer and press against you but you leaned back. “Uh, uh. Tell me.” The taunting was relentless, you really were such a tease. To sweeten the deal you lifted his hand that was gripping the counter to rest on your inner thigh. You gazed into his eyes once again and grinned as you saw how flustered Bam looked. “C’mon. Give in and just fuck me already.” You pushed your hips forward again to press your clit against the faucet, earning yourself a moan which caused Bam’s eyes to light up. He reached his hands up to hold your waist before pulling you forward, encouraging you to grind against the surface. You laughed, “You want me to get off on a sink?” Bam bit his lip, only responding by pulling you more forcefully against it.

You moaned at the contact before giving in to his wishes, shifting your hips to rub yourself against it. Bam watched you with awe as you did so, your face contorting with pleasure, the fabric of your pants giving you the right amount of friction to get off. You threw your head back against the mirror as your hands steadied themselves on Bam’s shoulders, his hands still gripping your waist. Eventually you were going fast, building yourself up for your big finish, exaggerating each motion and noise leaving your lips. “Are you hard?” You panted and Bam nodded enthusiastically. “You gonna fuck me after this?” He nodded again and you smiled, blissed out. “So you want me?” “Yeah.” Bam croaked out, still focused on making you come fully clothed. “I’m gonna come.” You moaned out, fingers digging into Bam’s flesh as you rode out your high, hips stuttering against the faucet while slowly grinding.

“That was fucking hot.” Bam breathed out, releasing his grip on your waist. You swung your leg over the faucet and sat on the smooth part of the counter, grabbing Bam by his collar and kissing him roughly. You fumbled to pull down your pants and unbuckle Bam’s belt, opting to leave your shirts on as this was only supposed to be a quickie anyways. Bam pulled your panties down swiftly off of your body, leaving them to hang around your ankles. You reached into his boxers and pulled out his cock. You couldn’t help but snicker a little as you pumped him. “What?” He asked, looking a little pissed off. “Oh nothing. Just knew you were compensating for something.” Bam was angry now. “The fucks that supposed to mean?!” He pulled your ass down the counter to get a better angle of your heat. You laughed, “Alright, come on and fuck me pretty boy.” You wrapped your arms around Bam’s neck as he entered you, not even wincing. “God is that all of it?” You teased, Bam’s face a violent red as he bottomed out into you. “Shut the fuck up slut.” Bam spat and you grinned. He was doing exactly what you wanted. His thrusts became more erratic, slamming into you but barely giving pleasure. You jokingly yawned which really pissed Bam off. He grabbed your face with his hand, forcing you to look him in the eye. “Don’t act like you weren’t fucking yourself against a faucet right in front of me two minutes ago, whore.” He spat and you simply smiled. “Am I being a bad girl?” You teased, inciting cringe-worthy dirty talk.

Bam moved his hands down to grasp at your ass, slamming you down on top of him as he thrusted. “Even the faucet made me feel better.” You whispered, the anger fueling Bam to get rougher. His hips were slamming against yours then, using all his might to fuck you properly. Soon enough Bam gave up on making you come that way, instead using his thumb on the hand that wasn’t now squeezing your throat to rub at your clit. You breathed heavier, still managing to spew insults between pants. “I bet Tim has a better cock than you.” His hand tightened around your throat. “Say that again bitch.” You tried to croak it out but his hand was even tighter now, the restriction sending shocks of pleasure down to your core. He loosened his grip as he began properly plowing into you, thumb moving at an intense speed. “Come for me slut.” He demanded and you giggled at his dirty talk. “Yes Sir Margera.” You teased but eventually obliged, finishing with a loud moan, head against the mirror. His thumb continued to rub your clit with vigour, refusing to remove it when you tried pushing him away. The overstimulation was getting too much until he had built you up to that place again, just teetering on the edge. “I’m coming.” He groaned, breathing heavily as he just about made you come for the third time before his thumb stopped moving, spilling into you.

You whimpered at the feeling of his cum inside you. “I didn’t say you could come there.” You complained. Bam muttered an ‘oh shit’ and pulled out of you, watching the liquid spill out. “Fuck. You on the pill?” You laughed, “Yeah I just don’t want to skate with your cum dripping down my leg.” He shrugged and pulled you panties back up. “Problem solved.” You rolled your eyes, “Tim can fuck it back into me anyways.” Bam shot you a disdainful look and you cackled. “What’s wrong? First time a girl ever talked back to you in bed?” Bam muttered something incomprehensible under his breath, stuffing his dick back into his jeans. “I know you liked it.” He glared at you, fixing his hair in the mirror and preparing to leave the bathroom. “You’re an asshole.” He spat and you laughed, “Means a lot coming from the best.” Bam stormed out, leaving you with just your cargos pooled around your ankles, sadistic smile still playing on your face.

End.

@gnarkillknoxville @lovexjoe @jackussy420 @bambammargera @steve-osahottie @izzaaaaaa @jackassvivalabam03 @spoookyberry

[asskickedbygirl]

re upload of one of my fav fics on ao3 cos it got fl*gged.

[asskickedbygirl]

Hello I have jealous Knoxville brain rot and I was wondering if you could write a Knoxville x fem!reader where the reader is bams best friend and they grew up skating together attached at the hip but Johnny is fully into the reader and she’s into Johnny (he does not see this) but he thinks she and bam are going to date because everyone thinks they would make the perfect couple. It can take whatever direction you would prefer from there I just would die for some pining jealous Knox 😭

Going Up

[Johnny Knoxville x F!Reader]

Desc: Anon covered it but I made it smutty! As in elevator sex smutty...

A/n: need to put eyeliner on johnny rn. also I'm trying to do something different in all of my smuts so they don’t get boring or repetitive to write so lmk if you like it!! comments and reblogs make my day fr <3

Warnings: smut (18+), p in v, public sex (sort of), alcohol

3.4k words

⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒

Bam and you were fucking around on your boards, doing stupid tricks and just wasting time until you were called to set. You always thought it was stupid that your call times were so early when you were never really needed until the afternoon at least. Nonetheless you showed up, bored and hungover. 

“Fuck I’ve almost got it.” You bitched, irritated that you couldn’t succeed in the easiest tricks when your head was throbbing from the night before. Bam laughed, 

“Yeah, sure you do.” This earned him a prompt thump on the arm from your fist, your teeth grinding. 

“Shut up, dickhead.” He still laughed, only holding the site of injury this time. He looked up behind you and raised his eyebrows. You spun around to see who he was looking at only to see Johnny Knoxville staring over at the two of you, quickly shifting his gaze once you spotted him, pretending he wasn’t looking. 

“Hmmm.” Bam hmmmed. 

“What?” You asked, skating in circles around him. 

“He’s got the hots for you.” 

You rolled your eyes, “You think everyone’s got the hots for me.” 

“Because they do!” 

You scoffed, “Your ego for me is bigger than my own. No one even asks me out anymore.” 

“That’s ‘cause they think we’re dating.” 

You pouted in contemplation. “I guess. Well why won’t you date me then?!” You brought your arms around Bam’s neck in mockery as you skated past him, laughing as he attempted to shoo you off. You planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek like a drunken aunt. 

“You’re gross. You’re like my sister, freak.” You giggled as Bam attempted to wipe your spit off his face, arms still wrapped around him.

Johnny swallowed thickly as he observed you acting all coupley with Bam, sipping the crappy cup of coffee he got from the catering table when Ryan wandered over to him and looked to see what he was gawking at. He sighed, 

“You know they’re not dating, right?” Johnny was snapped out of his daze upon hearing his voice. 

He cleared his throat, “What? Oh, uh. Yeah.” He scratched the back of his head, feeling caught. He bit his lip, looking back over to you, his heart beating a little faster the wider you smiled. 

“She probably likes you dude. There’s not many women that don’t.” Johnny took another sip from his styrofoam cup, eyes still on you, shrugging. Ry just shook his head, chuckling under his breath. He patted Johnny reassuringly on his shoulder and walked away, leaving him to yearn a little longer. You glanced up to see Johnnys eyes still drinking you in. You smiled and waved at him jokingly, causing his cheeks to flush as he hobbled off. Maybe he does have the hots for you after all.

“She probably likes you dude. There’s not many women that don’t.” Johnny took another sip from his styrofoam cup, eyes still on you, shrugging. Ry just shook his head, chuckling under his breath. He patted Johnny reassuringly on his shoulder and walked away, leaving him to yearn a little longer. You glanced up to see Johnnys eyes still drinking you in. You smiled and waved at him jokingly, causing his cheeks to flush as he hobbled off. Maybe he does have the hots for you after all.

A few days later you were in your hotel room applying your makeup, ready to go hit the bars after filming on location in New York. Bam and you were sharing, not the same bed but still, it didn’t help the rumours. You carefully lined your lips with liner as Bam lay on his bed staring at the ceiling, bored out of his tree waiting on you. 

“The bars are gonna be fucking closed by the time we leave.” You rolled your eyes, rubbing your lips together and tousling your hair. 

“It’s not even eleven yet. We’re gonna be early freak.” Bam pushed himself off the mattress,

 “Fuck this, I’m leaving with Ryan it’s too late to be this sober.” 

He grabbed his jacket and key card and swung the door open only to be met with a tall figure, hand raised and ready to knock. 

“Johnny.” Bam spoke, leading you to snap your head to take a look at the supposed man at your door. 

“Hey.” The often confident man’s voice wavered awkwardly, as if he had been caught in a trap. Bam leaned back to look at you, then back to Johnny, smiling like an idiot.

 “I was about to head with Ryan, you can come if you want or uh…” Bam raised his brows suggestively, something you didn’t spot. Johnny cleared his throat and swallowed thickly, contemplating for a moment whether or not he wanted to let it out that he’d rather stay with you. 

“I can stay with her while she gets ready. Bring you down if you want.” He called out to you, biting the bullet. You flicked your hair away from your face, grinning, 

“Sure. I’ll be ready in a minute anyways.” Bam shrugged and left the two of you to it, Johnny stumbling in and seating himself on the edge of your bed, observing you through the mirror as you smudged some more eyeliner in your waterline.

“That looks like it hurts. Is it not going into your eye?!” Johnny gritted his teeth together while you giggled. 

“I’m used to it. Here let me put some on you.” You held the eyeliner pencil between your fingers and turned to face him though his hands were already raised up, refusing.

“Oh come on! It doesn’t hurt and you can wash it off if you really hate it!” You flashed your best puppy dog eyes which ultimately worked as he simply couldn’t say no to you when you looked like that. He rolled his eyes as you grinned, moving closer to him. His breath hitched as your knees brushed against his, hands holding himself up as he leaned back slightly, eyes peering up at you. You took your bottom lip between your teeth in concentration and rested your hand against his cheek, Johnny swallowing right after. You used your thumb to pull his eye down just a tad, enough to see his waterline and went right in to apply it, accidentally poking him straight in the eye. 

“Ow!” The jabbed exclaimed, pulling away from you and holding his hand over his eye dramatically. 

You rolled you eyes. “Alright sorry. It was only a poke! C’mere it didn’t even get in your waterline.” Johnny was about to protest but felt he couldn’t once you pulled his face forward again forcefully, tongue poking out of your mouth as you concentrated on the task at hand.

He looked up to the ceiling and pretended the situation wasn’t incredibly uncomfortable as your raised leg kneeled on his lap in order to get the job done, face so close to his own as you tediously worked on coating his under eyes with black eyeliner. He couldn’t help but let his eyes drift to take you in, somehow you looked even more beautiful when you were in concentration. Your eyes met his and you smiled with your brows knitted together, a little unsure on why he was gawking once again. Well not really unsure, you were fairly sure. As you got back to it, Johnny posed a question,

“So you do this with Bam a lot huh?” You rolled your eyes at the insinuation of it. 

“Well yeah, ever since he saw Ville with it he begs me to do it all the time. He fucks it up whenever he tries to put it on himself.” You pulled the pencil away to admire your work as the first eye seemed done. 

“Looks good.” You smile, Johnny trying to move his head to take a look in the mirror but your hand pulling his face away. 

“Not yet. Lemme do the other one.” You repeated your movements of pulling his eye down slightly with your thumb to do the next one, brows knitted together.

Johnny looked up to you, sunken eyes boring into your face. 

“So you and Bam huh?” You scoffed, that was a sentence you heard practically everyday. 

“No. Not me and Bam. How long have I known you at this stage?!” 

Johnny smiled. “I dunno. You’re sharing a hotel room so.” His southern voice drawled. You continued penciling in the makeup. 

“Different beds idiot. MTV’s budget must be tight this year.” 

Johnny bit his lip. “So there’s nothing going on there.” 

You shook your head, “Nothing.” That’s when you finished the job, pulling away to admire your work. 

“Not bad huh?” This time you allowed Johnny to look at himself, standing up to get closer to the mirror. 

“Christ I look ridiculous.” 

You laughed, “No you don’t! This is so in right now.” You folded your arms and came up to the mirror as well to look at his face through the reflection. 

“Yeah it’s in for twenty year olds. I’m old remember?” 

You rolled your eyes. “You’re only like nine years older than me.”

Johnny flashed you a ‘careful’ look, but you smiled it off. He looked fucking hot if you were being honest, and that little crush you had on him was coming back in full force. You bit your lip as you and Johnny stared at each other for a little too long until he bustled off to the bathroom to attempt to scrub the liner off. His efforts were almost futile, a faint black still present in his waterline. 

“That’s hot! No, seriously it looks good like that.” Johnny sighed as he realised he’d have to go out with a trace of makeup on his face. 

“Are girls gonna think I’m gay?” 

You laughed, shaking your head. “Well you’ll have me on your arm so, hopefully not.” Johnny raised his brow at you but you ignored him, grabbing your purse, ready to hit the bars.

The bar everyone was meeting at was busy and bustling, a live band playing. You and Johnny arrived together of course and hit the bar immediately to get some drinks, already far too sober compared to the likes of Chris and Steve-o. You sat together in slightly close quarters, chatting amongst yourselves. You were enjoying his company, he smelled nice and the more you drank the more flirty you got. You had already punched Steve-o square in the arm when he made a dumb comment about Johnny’s ‘new look’ and an hour later his arm was draped over you. That was until Bam stumbled over to you all, clearly very drunk. 

“You have to come dance with me. Now!” He reached out and grabbed your hand, forcing you up and away from your arm candy. 

“Hey!” You called out but Bam was already pulling you onto the dance floor, hands grabbing your waist to dance with you.

You reluctantly pulled your arms up around Bam’s shoulders. Sure you loved to dance but when you did with Bam and you were drunk, the rumours were only set ablaze. You tried to catch Johnnys eyes as you swung your hips, only seeing him grit his teeth and practically glare at Bam. Was he… jealous? You looked at your dance partner who was too inebriated to have any sort of spatial awareness, simply blindly moving you around. Out of the corner of your eye you spotted an attractive looking girl dancing by herself and so you hatched a plan. As Johnny continued to glare you pushed Bam off of you and practically shoved him towards the other girl. 

“This is Bam!” You called out to her and she looked rather thrilled, must’ve been a fan. 

As the new couple began to dance once more you strutted over towards Johnny who was now looking at you like a deer in the headlights.

“Come on. You wanna dance with me right? Well dance with me now!” You slipped your hand in his and pulled him up, dragging him behind you as you set off for the floor. 

Johnny was in slight shock, his hands finding their way to your waist in a daze as you brought your arms around his neck, moving your hips with the beat. You looked up to Johnny and flashed a smug grin, 

“Were you jealous Knoxville?” 

Johnny blushed, laughing and shaking his head.

“So what if I was?”

You smiled even wider, taking Johnny’s hand from your waist and moving it down to cup your ass.

“You don’t need to be.” 

You chewed your lip as his hands felt you up on the dance floor, not caring that people might see your skirt riding up and exposing your ass. Johnny looked especially attractive as he appeared almost flustered, cheeks burning red and eyes blown out. As the music changed you moved yourself around so your back was pressed against his chest, letting his arms drape around you and push you closer to him, feeling the outline of his dick press into your ass. You grinded to the beat of the loud music, feeling his breath on your neck and his stubble grazing your skin. It felt almost too intimate right there in the middle of all the bodies, sweaty and drunk, but god did you want him. You placed your hand over Johnny’s as it pressed into your stomach to hold you there and turned around so you could whisper in his ear,

“Wanna get out of here?” 

Johnny only nodded, allowing you to lead him away from the crowds and out of the bar towards your hotel. Boy were you glad it was so close by as the desperation was radiating off of your hot bodies, clammy hands holding each other as you made your way through the streets, no talking necessary. 

You both smiled politely at the receptionists as you wandered inside the hotel, trying to act as if you weren’t as desperate as you’d ever been, silently praying no stranger would join you in the elevator on your way up. Alas you were left alone, standing side by side as the doors shut. One second later Johnny flipped himself around and slammed his lips onto yours, forcing his leg between yours so they were parted and making out with you roughly. Your hands flew up to hold his face, letting out quiet whimpers as he took you with such force. His hands were already roaming over your body, fisting the fabric of the back of your skirt in his hand and pulling it up. If you didn’t know him any better you’d think he was about to fuck you in the elevator.

That’s when you felt it jolt, stopping on whatever floor you were on. You opened your eyes and pulled away from Johnny’s mouth in a panic, thinking something had broken but instead you were met with his hand over the emergency stop button, manical grin on his face. You covered your mouth with your hand, half shocked but entirely bemused.

“Are you serious?!” You laughed, completely bewildered.

“Couldn’t wait any longer.” is all he said, immediately diving back in to kiss you once more.

As your skirt had already been pushed up over your ass, in fact bunched up around your waist, Johnny’s fingers were smoothly tucked into the band of your panties, waiting for the moment he could finally pull them down. He took the opportunity as soon as your hand reached down to palm him over his pants, pushing your body against the wall of the elevator at the same time. You let out a groan as you frantically unbuckled his pants, him eventually giving in and shoving them down to pool around his ankles instead. 

After some more hot and heavy making out, you felt Johnny’s hard cock press into the inside of your thigh and so you took matters into your own hands, freeing the member and urging him to fuck you against the cool metal walls of the box. You moaned as he entered you, his stubbly chin grazing your neck and lips kissing the skin tenderly as he began bucking his hips forward. He dug his thumbs into the skin of your waist to hold you still, your arms wrapping around his neck to brace yourself the faster he went. 

Johnny’s grunts and your whimpers echoed around the elevator, it even jolted slightly with every thrust and it almost felt surreal that heart throb Johnny Knoxville was fucking you in a hotel elevator. You hid your girlish grin in the crook of his neck, kissing and sucking on it all the while. 

“You think Bam could fuck me like this?” You whispered into his ear.

Sure it was evil but god did you love provoking the men that fucked you, it just makes everything more fun. Johnny laughed, more of a ‘fuck you’ sort of chuckle but he laughed nonetheless.

“You gonna talk about Bam while I’m balls deep inside of you?”

Johnny pulled his lips away from your neck to look you in the eye, yours as blown out as his. You grinned playfully.

“Well this means you don’t have to be jealous anymore. Your eyeliners fucking hot by the way” 

Johnny laughed.

“Shut up.”

He continued to fuck you hard, his thrusts only increasing in pace and his moans only getting louder along with yours. It wasn’t long until he got you to that familiar place, head leaning back against the wall as you were worked to the edge.

“Fuck I’m gonna come.” You managed to get out between pants, holding onto your breath as you felt the sensation creep forward. 

Johnny continued his relentless pace until you came hurtling down, the wave of pleasure washing over you and making your legs shake. The feeling of you tightening around Johnny made his breath hitch as you brought him closer to the edge.

“Can I come inside you baby?” 

You nodded, head still reeling from your orgasm. Johnny gripped your hips tightly, pushing even further into you as he came with a loud groan into your neck, the hot breath sending shivers down your spine.

The two of you remained in the same place, panting and fucked out, sweat dripping from your foreheads. Johnny’s head was still buried in the crook of your neck.

“You alright there?” You laughed, poking his cheek.

He pulled away grinning.

“That’s the hottest thing I’ve ever done.” 

You both laughed until Johnny kissed you again, your heads all foggy.

“You know we can do this again once we’re out of this elevator right?” You pulled away once his kisses got more needy, practically ready for round two already when his dick was growing soft inside you. 

He laughed as he pulled out of you, the sensation making you wince slightly. 

“Sorry.” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

He bent down to help pull your panties back up and smooth your skirt out after buckling up his own pants. He fixed himself up a little more before pressing the emergency stop button once again as well as another button.

“Shit.” He muttered. 

“What?!”

Johnny bared his teeth.

“I accidentally pressed the reception floor.” 

You rolled your eyes and scoffed.

“Christ I hope those poor workers don’t see us again.” 

Just as you attempted to fix up your hair the doors opened to reveal none other than Bam Margera himself, arm sleazily hung over the same girl you threw him at on the dance floor. You and Johnny must’ve looked like a deer in headlights right then but Bam was far too drunk and oblivious to notice just yet.

“Oh hey guys!” He grinned, entering with his new chick, her hand dragging over his chest.

“Weird the elevator wasn’t working for a minute. What were you guys doing already in here, I thought you left like thirty minutes ago?” Bam asked but his face dropped once it dawned on him.

He observed the pair of you, your makeup all messed up with tangled hair, skirt all wrinkled and Johnny with his messy hair and lipstick stains coating his neck and collar. 

“Oh.” 

“Let’s not.” You interjected before Bam could say anything that would make your skin crawl. 

The rest of the elevator ride was painfully awkward and silent, even Bam’s girl noticing the horrible tension. Once you finally reached your floor after what felt like forever Bam spoke up.

“So uhh... can we take our room or do you want to-” 

“Take our room.” You sputtered, leaving the damn elevator as soon as possible and darting towards Knoxville’s room, desperate to escape. 

End.

@gnarkillknoxville @jackussy420 @spoookyberry @steve-osahottie @izzaaaaaa @lovexjoe @jackassvivalabam03 @kristinee

[asskickedbygirl]

Hey there!

First of all: I love your work, you're doing a great job and I really love your writing style!

I'd like to request something (if you don't want to write that it's cool). I had some kind of a down time for the past few weeks and need something funny/comforting. I thought of maybe reader being a medic on the set of jackass and she and bam and Ryan had a troubled past. So when she sees them she's like "oh please don't get hurt" and the other boys are teasing her like "oh, are you worried about them?" And she's like "god no I don't want to see their faces more than I need to."

And bam or Ryan kinda start to like her and is jealous when the other guys try to flirt with her.

Can end in smut, even though I'm ace and not a smut fan, but the stuff you write is so good, I can totally live with that.

Thanks for your fics and happy new year!

Tell Me

[Ryan Dunn x F!Reader]

A/n: ASSKICKEDBYGIRL WRITING FLUFF FOR ONCE?!?!?!? 😱😱yeah there's a shock. thank you for the req sorry it took me a while to get around to it but thank you for saying that too!!! I've missed writing I wish I didn't have a life.

warnings: mentions of sex, alcohol, cursing

2.9k words

⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒

"You might be busy today, looks like Bam and Ryan are gonna fuck something up." Jeff tutted, glancing over to where the crew were setting up.

"God I hope they don't get hurt."

Johnny overheard what you said, a smirk appearing on his face as he wandered over to where you and Jeff were stood.

"And why's that? You got a crush? Worrying your pretty little head over em?" He laughed, ruffling up your hair as you tried pushing him off.

"God no. I don't wanna see their faces more than I have to."

Johnny's brows narrowed, unsure of why you had some sort of vendetta against the two buffoons from West Chester.

"They went to high school together." Jeff answered Johnny's confusion for you before leaving the two of you be.

"Ah I see. One of them an ex or something?"

You shook your head, scoffing.

"Definitely not. They were just idiots that's all."

Johnny could tell you were leaving some detail out as you continued setting up your station, the job you were supposed to be doing instead of chatting with the star of the movie.

"Did they pick on you? Cause' if that's the case I can kick their asses for you. We'll call it reparations."

Johnny's sweet talking pulled a little smile from you though you kept your eyes trained on the ground, afraid you might fall into Johnny's sunken ones as crushing on coworkers was totally a no-go in the professional sense.

"No it's okay. They were kind of assholes to a lot of people so it's not really considered picking on me. Just boys being dumb."

Johnny nodded, biting his lip.

"Well hell maybe they've changed, they're only jackasses professionally now!"

You laughed, glancing up to meet Johnny's eyes.

"Yeah, maybe they just keep the assholery for when they're getting paid."

Before you could launch into any further discussion with the heart throb, the two cast members you'd least like to speak to darted over, calling your name.

"Did you miss us?" Ryan laughed, wrapping an arm around you like you were the best of buds.

"Can't say I did Dunn." You awkwardly shoved his arm off of you, trying your best to continue unpacking though Bam sitting on top of your workplace made that rather difficult.

"Oh come on, you had to have missed me after I dropped out!" Bam chuckled, leaning back, Johnny simply observing the mini high school reunion.

"I will say Bam, Raab shitting on those lockers was the best thing he ever did, got rid of the two of you!"

That's when Johnny finally interjected, laughing whole-heartedly and clutching his chest.

"Raab did what?!"

"You don't know this? Raab got expelled for smearing shit on a bunch of lockers so Bam dropped out." Ryan smiled, relishing in relaying the story despite the fact he wasn't actually there to experience it.

"Chris committed a string of shit related crimes but that one was truly the last straw." You nodded, smiling at Johnny's joy.

"Well hey, they were pretty funny, you have to admit." Bam extended his arm, attempting to grasp some humour from you.

"Funny isn't the word I'd use... disgusting seems more fitting. Plus you guys were dickheads back then."

Bam and Ryan matched faces of confusion.

"What are you talking about? We were dumb kids everyone just ignored." Bam said, Ryan nodding along.

"Seriously? You don't remember?"

There was an awkward silence then, Bam and Ryan racking their brains trying to understand what the hell you were on about.

"Remember what?" Ryan asked.

You bit the inside of your cheek, glancing between the two boys and remembering Johnny was right there too, witnessing this strange sort of confrontation. You weren't sure if you really wanted to unload the words that swirled in your head through in your teen years in front of the guy you kinda liked, the idea was not exactly appealing.

"Whatever, forget it." You bit your tongue, grabbing something and pretending you had something else to attend to when you were just desperate to make an escape.

***

After that awkward little encounter Bam and Ryan seemed to be making an array of unnecessary visits to your station, pestering you for band aids and asking if random bruises 'looked okay'.

"Bam you've had thousands of bruises in your lifetime, I'm sure you know that looks perfectly normal."

"Alright yeah, I just wanted to come talk to you before Dunn or Knoxville had a chance." Bam pulled down the leg of his pants as your brows narrowed.

"What are you talking about?"

Bam grinned at you, like he knew something you didn't.

"No it's nothing, I just like talking to you."

Bam's glimmering eyes were seeping into you but it wasn't really working, in fact he was becoming more of a nuisance than anything else.

"Well I appreciate the fact you enjoy my company but I'm kinda trying to work here."

Bam rolled his eyes, not giving up.

"Oh come on. No one's hurt you don't have any work to do, just tell me why I was an ass and I'll leave."

As soon as the words left Bam's lips a yell was heard where Johnny was performing a stunt followed by a 'Medic!" shout.

"Fuck." You muttered, grabbing your kit and running over to where Johnny lay clutching his ankle.

"I think I broke it." He spoke through gritted teeth, eyes shut tightly.

You removed Johnny's hand to see the area was already swelling.

"Help me get him to the tent, I have an ice pack there." You called out to someone, Ryan jumping into play as he swung Johnny's arm around his shoulder while you did the same with his other arm, helping him up and steadying him.

A gaggle of people tried to follow you along but you shooed them off.

"He'll be fine, Jeff can you tell everyone to fuck off please?" You called out, Jeff simply shooting you a thumbs up and waving away any stragglers.

As you, Ryan and Johnny eventually made it to the med tent to sit Johnny down, you noticed a stray had followed you along.

"I don't need both of you here." You called out to Ryan and Bam who both pretended to look mightily concerned as Johnny winced and you fetched the ice pack.

"I'll stay." They both said in unison, earning a glare from you.

"I think I can handle a sprained ankle guys, goodbye." You pushed Ryan and Bam out of your tent and closed the curtains, turning to face Johnny.

"Sorry about those idiots, they won't fucking leave me alone." You muttered, removing Johnny's shoe and sock and placing the ice pack on his swollen ankle, causing him to suck sharply through his teeth.

"You think I fucked it up badly?"

"Nah, probably just a sprain even though it might seem a lot worse, you'll have to use crutches for a bit though."

Johnny sighed, looking pissed off.

"Well there goes two weeks where I can't do shit."

There was an awkward silence in the tent then as you kneeled below him, lifting his foot with your hand to elevate it.

"You know they probably like you right?"

"What?" For being so irritated and in pain, Johnny was really gonna bring up Bam and Ryan?

"The idiots. They have massive crushes on you, I know it."

You laughed, shaking your head.

"You're delusional."

Johnny smiled, staring at you below him, rooting through your bag for bandages.

"I think I'm very lusional actually."

"Oh god, lusional? He's losing it nurse this must be something far more serious!" You laughed, wrapping the bandage tightly around Johnny as he laughed too, wincing through the pain.

Bam and Ryan stood outside the tent waiting for you, their ears only being filled with joyous laughter, their teeth now grinding together.

"Think they need help?" Bam folded his arms, beginning to grow impatient.

"She likes him. Of course she fucking does, what girl doesn't like Knoxville." Ryan spat under his breath, kicking the ground beneath his shoe.

"You know, maybe if we weren't such dicks in high school she might give us the time of the day." He added, turning away from the tent to fuck off somewhere, pulling out a pack of cigarettes.

"Come on dude, we weren't that bad." Bam called out but Ryan shook his head.

"Well clearly we were if she can't stand talking to us for more than two fucking seconds." He went off in a huff, regret coursing through his veins at the unknown actions of his teenage self.

Who knew being a bit of a dick in high school would come back to bite you in the ass?

***

It was a Friday night and the crew were off drinking at a local bar after a week of filming. Knoxville had been sentenced to two weeks on crutches and so was hobbling around the bar with them while Bam and Ryan were still falling over each other trying to talk to you. You sat in a booth next to Chris, sipping on your vodka soda and trying to ignore the pestering Bam who was getting more and more drunk by the minute when suddenly he spoke your name all serious.

"Just tell me how Ryan and I were such dicks to you in high school and I promise I'll fuck off."

You were pulled away from your lively conversation to be met with yet another awkward confrontation.

"Bam I don't wanna get into this, seriously." Bam threw his arm over your shoulder and pressed his finger against your lips.

"Just tell me! I'm sorry I was an asshole cause' now I really wanna bang you."

"Alright Bam! That's enough of that!" Like a deus ex machina, Ryan graciously came to your rescue, dragging his drunk friend away from you and pushing him towards another group of Jackass people.

Your eyes were wide, mouth slightly agape.

"Sorry about him, whiskey is like his truth serum."

You just shook your head laughing, still in a state of disbelief.

"Well I wasn't expecting a love confession to go like that."

"He has a way with words." Ryan laughed, shrugging.

"I'm going to the bar and am not ordering whiskey." Chris murmured, sliding out from the booth and leaving you and Ryan alone.

"So you and Bam really wanna know why I didn't like you when we were younger huh?"

Ryan took a sip from his drink, trying to act as if he didn't care as much as his inebriated best friend.

"I mean, kinda but- yeah. Yeah we do wanna know."

You laughed, shaking your head.

"Fine, I'll tell you."

Ryan's eyes widened.

"You will?"

"I will. but! only if you tell me one thing."

"Anything, what is it?" Ryan nodded enthusiastically.

"Do you have a crush on me too?" Your smile widened, eyes burrowing into his own.

Ryan laughed awkwardly, eyes spinning around the room trying to avoid your gaze.

"Oh come on, what are we 16?"

"Well you wanna know why I thought you guys were assholes at 16 so?"

Ryan bit his lip, considering his options when he just settled on biting the bullet.

"Fine. Yeah I do have a crush on you. That's why I wanna know why you're not giving me any chances so bad."

You smiled smugly, picking up Ryan's glass of whiskey.

"God this stuff really is truth serum!"

You both shared a moment of laughter before settling down.

"Alright I'll tell you. Sophomore year you were a Senior. I kinda liked your hair and I thought you were cute."

Ryan bit back a smile.

"I was at my locker and you and Bam were talking and I kinda overheard your conversation."

Ryan winced at that.

"Well that's never good."

You scratched the back of your head, smile faltering slightly when you remembered what you were about to spill, the alcohol in your system making your lips a little looser.

"Well you know I was pretty quiet in high school. Didn't really talk to anyone except my close friends."

Ryan nodded, straying away from any jokes as he noticed your change in demeanour.

"Since I was so quiet I could kinda fly under the radar, overhear things nobody thought I would hear, I was kind of invisible like that. Anyways, one day you and Bam were talking about girls."

Your eyes were stuck on the table, not wanting to look up and back out of what Ryan had lured you into saying.

"I noticed Bam kinda nodded his head towards me and asked you 'What about her?' I didn't hear the first part but knew it had something to do with sex or dating or whatever."

Out of the corner of your eye you could see Ryan was turning red, already embarrassed before he was even told what he had to be embarrassed about.

"And you said something like 'Fuck no she's a prude. Just an uptight bitch.'"

Ryan swallowed thickly, eyes flicking down to his shoes.

"Then Bam was like 'Yeah she's a cunt. Wouldn't fuck me if I was dying.' and then you just laughed and walked off."

There was quiet then, Ryan shaking his head and sighing.

"Look I don't hold it against you. You were just asshole teenagers and I'm sorry for acting like a bitch late-"

"No stop." Ryan stuck his hand out, interrupting your apologetic spiel.

"I was a fucking dickhead, I'm sorry for saying that shit, it wasn't even true."

You smirked, biting your lip.

"It was kinda true. Still is."

Ryan met your eyes then, his expression hiding a smile

"I just said that bullshit cause' I thought you were cute and I didn't want Bam to get his grubby hands on you."

You rolled your eyes, properly laughing then.

"Oh fuck off Dunn. Don't pull that 'He's only mean because he likes you!' shit on me now!"

Ryan shook his head, smile growing.

"I'm serious! Why do you think Bam and I are falling over our feet trying to talk to you now?!"

You narrowed your eyes and crossed your arms, smirk pulling at your lips.

"Are you telling me this whole time the older kid I thought was cute also thought I was cute?"

Ryan smiled before wetting his lips, arm moving himself closer to you.

"And what if I am?"

You laughed heartily, pushing Ryan's chest.

"Don't put your moves on me Dunn. Did you forget I'm a prude?"

He rolled his eyes again, chuckling.

"Come on let me walk you home before Knoxville breaks something else that you need to look at."

Ryan reached his hand out to pull you out of the booth.

"Jealous already Dunn? Guess you really are the type."

You allowed yourself to get dragged up, Ryan slipping his arm around your shoulder to usher you out of the bar.

"Hey where the fuck are you two going?!" Bam slurred out, bringing everyone's attention to you and Ryan.

You half smiled, unsure of what to say. That's when your eyes met with Johnny's as you witnessed him compute in real time what was happening. When he realised who you were going home with that night he simply smiled and winked at you. How was he always right?

"Taking her home asshole." Ryan called out, wasting no time in pulling you away, the urgency making you laugh.

As you walked down the streets of West Chester, Ryan's hand moved down to hold you by your waist, whispering crude comments about passer-bys in your ear to make you laugh when eventually you reached your apartment building.

"Thanks for walking me home." You smiled, holding your hand over where Ryan was holding your waist and turning to face him.

You looked into each others eyes for a moment, both of you smirking uncontrollably.

"I'd invite you in but, you know I'm a prude so."

Ryan rolled his eyes as you cackled, slapping his chest.

"I deserve that."

You smiled sweetly as Ryan did too, his eyes flicking down to your lips for a millisecond as your faces got closer.

"I don't think we should do anything tonight but..." You brought your hand up to rest on Ryan's cheek, rubbing his face with your thumb.

"I could give you something else." You whispered, leaning in and kissing him.

Ryan kept his hold on your waist but moved his other hand to touch your own face, deepening the kiss. He pushed your body to be closer to his own, moving his lips against yours roughly, beard grazing your chin. Before things could escalate any further you pulled away, allowing yourselves to catch your breath.

"You foiled my plan." Ryan laughed, brushing your hair off of your face.

"What?"

"My plan this whole time was to get the prude to sleep with me ten years later, it was strategy all along."

You both laughed.

"I see, you really plan ahead. I guess I'll just have to sleep with you now."

Ryan quirked an eyebrow at your obviously sarcastic response, resulting in a punch to the arm. You laughed pulling away from his hold on you.

"Goodnight Ryan." You turned your back to him and began unlocking the door as he still stood behind you. As the door opened you turned around, smirking before kissing him one last time for the night.

"Call me."

"I'd be an idiot not to."

"What's new?"

End.

@gnarkillknoxville @jackussy420 @lovexjoe @steve-osahottie @stratossphere @izzaaaaaa @jackassvivalabam03 @nonbinarypontius

[asskickedbygirl]

Hii I just wanted to say I absolutely love your writing it’s so good and I was wondering if you could write something with Steve-o on how a new girl comes to the set of jackass and he starts ignoring you and always around her but when he sees you hanging out with someone else (maybe Ryan or Bam) he gets really jealous

The Workplace Flirt

[Steve-o x F!Reader]

Desc: combined two requests for this one! set during early 2000s so MTV steve-o

A/n: hope this ends the steve-o drought for you guys <3 also ik steph was never really new but i wasn’t bothered to make an oc so the loml will suffice. also i don’t really love writing steve-o so sorry if it’s a bit shit lmao i don’t think i really hit the last request that well…

Warnings: smut (18+), p in v, mentions of alcohol

2.2k words

⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒

You and Steve-O had a... complicated relationship. By ‘relationship’ you meant being coworkers and by ‘complicated’ you mean him trying to get in your pants every minute. He was persistent, you’d give him that but eventually it would just get pretty irritating. His relentless flirting drove you up the walls and would only get worse when he was drinking which was pretty much all of the time.

“Hey pretty lady.” He’d slur, beer in one hand as his other arm slid sleazily around your shoulder.

“Leave me alone Steve, I’m trying to work.” 

“Now why are you the only one who calls me Steve?” He’d spit the last word out like it was some disgusting piece of food.

“Cause’ that’s your name.” 

He’d roll his eyes.

“You should loosen up a bit. Always got something up your ass.”

“That’s rich coming from the dude that constantly has something up his.” 

He laughed at that.

“See, you can be funny when you wanna be. You gotta get in front of the camera now.” 

You just shook your head, still attempting to shove his arm off of you.

“Not happening.”

“Well I know I’d definitely want you in front of a camera, doing other things.” 

“Alright that’s enough.” Finally he’d be shoved off of you.

“Sex stuff.” 

“Yeah I gathered that much Steve.”

You had to admit, having a little admirer on set did make things a little more interesting. Every day you’d come in curious as to what outlandish thing Steve-o would say to you to desperately try to pull you. It wasn’t that he was ugly or anything, in fact you actually found him pretty cute but rejecting his advances just felt like principle after doing it a million times. After all, you were only a camera op trying to do your job. 

However the routine you were used to was flipped on its head when you returned to set after a new addition was added to the cast. Stephanie Hodge was a model friend of Johnny’s whom he invited to join the show when it became too much of a sausage fest. She was super sweet and kind and you guys hit it off right away but one thing was, she was absolutely stunning so naturally caught the eye of practically every guy on set. Every guy including Steve-o...

 It’s not like you were jealous or resentful of her or anything like that but a little part of you seethed at the fact your usual work lover was no longer falling over his feet over you. You never thought you’d miss the idiot bugging you as you tried to set up your camera every morning, whispering stupid things in your ear and trying his damndest to take you out but alas, here you were grinding your teeth and tapping your foot looking over at the drunk talking animatedly at the new girl in town.

“You alright there?” 

You were snapped out of your daze by a familiar voice.

“Oh, uh yeah I’m just uh- setting up.” 

Ryan tried to hide his smirk but failed at doing so as you noticed the slight upturn of his lips.

“What?”

He shook his head, smiling.

“Oh nothing. So what d’ya think of Steph?”

“Oh she’s great! She’s gonna be really funny I already know it.” 

Ryan nodded, still smirking.

“What?!” You punched him in the arm, trying to squeeze out whatever he was obviously hiding from you.

“No, nothing! It’s just... you seem sort of jealous is all.” 

You paused for a moment before scoffing dramatically.

“Jealous?! Of- of who?!” 

Ryan shook his head again, grinning.

“Dunno, just seems like maybe you’re missing your little Steve-O following you around like a lost puppy.”

You rolled your eyes as over the top as you could.

“Miss?! God no, if anything it’s a relief not having him here. We’re gonna be like way ahead today cause’ I’ll actually be ready to shoot on time.” 

Ryan bit his lip, still grinning from ear to ear.

“Whatever you say.”

He walked off, leaving you to dwell in your thoughts of brewing jealousy. 

Once lunch arrived you ended up at the catering table at the same time as your ‘ex’ admirer. The whole morning he’d been laughing and chatting to Steph who actually seemed kind enough to give him the time of day. He barely looked up when you brushed elbows, focusing too heavily on piling two plates up with food.

“Hey.” You spoke, possibly the first time you’d ever initiated conversation with Steve, just out of curiosity you supposed. 

“Hey.” 

He didn’t even bother making eye contact when he responded, almost as if it was deliberate.

“Who’s the other plate for?” 

You weren’t really sure why you were asking, you already knew the answer.

“Steph.” is all he said before walking off in the opposite direction, leaving you slightly bewildered at this sudden swap of character. 

How had he managed to make you the one desperate for his attention? 

As the days passed your resentment only grew, the other guys beginning to notice how you would shoot daggers with your eyes at the two love birds from across set, not on purpose of course. You couldn’t help but feel almost neglected, change not being your favourite thing to deal with. Well, only change in some ways as the newest shift in your life was rather welcomed.

Since your loss of the buzzcut-having idiot, a new person had strolled in to fill in his shoes as the one to annoy you as you worked. Well, not necessarily annoy, you rather enjoyed having Ryan around to talk to you. He wasn’t trying quite as desperately to get in your pants, in fact his flirting was far more subtle. 

The more Ryan was around, the less you seemed to care about Steve-O and Steph. Every morning he’d head over to where you were setting up and start talking.

“Hey, I listened to that band you were telling me about the other day, they’re really great actually.” Ryan told you, handing over a cup of coffee he got.

“See I told you they’d be your thing! If they come to LA or Philly we should go.” 

As you chatted away you began to notice a pair of eyes trained on you, an angry glare glazed over them. Steve-O had his fists clenched tightly as well as his jaw, looking as pissed as ever. You tried to ignore him and continue your conversation but you still found yourself getting distracted as the man-child stormed off in a huff.

‘What the fuck is he so mad for?’ You thought. All this time he appeared to have completely moved on from you and now suddenly he was all bitter about you simply talking with Ryan?! That doesn't seem fucking fair! You had always passed Steve-O off as the one jackass who would consistently ‘harass’ you but now after these games were going on it dawned on you; was there something there? Underneath this simple little routine you had formerly developed, had there always been some real emotions? You swallowed that down like a large pill, uncomfortably stuck in your throat. Fuck.

Before you knew it, filming was over and Tremaine was hosting the wrap party at his house, inviting the entire cast and crew. You dressed up pretty nice for it, sporting a short skirt and low cut top, if it wasn’t to impress Ryan it may have been for... you know who. 

The night was pretty great, getting to be intoxicated with your co-workers is always a privilege and you and Ryan were pretty much stuck together for the whole night. You also took notice to Steve glued to Steph as per usual but even still after all this time it didn't seem like either of you had actually gotten anywhere with your new partners. In fact a lot of the conversations you were having seemed to be held while your eyes were drifting in search of the other.

“I really fucked up my back on that one, which was stupid cause’ it was already fucked up.”

You nodded along to Ryan’s story while sipping your vodka coke, Steve-O and Steph in the corner of your eye sitting on the other couch. You chewed at your straw absentmindedly, the jealousy simmering in your heart as he slung his arm around her. 

“Go talk to him.”

Your attention was taken away.

“What?”

Ryan shook his head, smirking.

“To Steve-O. This is what it’s been all about, just get it over with already before you don’t see him for another six months.”

You shook your head in disbelief.

“I don't-”

“Its fine, really, I get it.” He gave you a genuine smile before getting off the couch towards Bam and the others. You sat in silence for a moment before looking up towards Steve-O, his eyes already boring into you even with Stephanie chatting away. Fuck it. 

You pushed yourself off the couch and beelined straight towards the man who was already looking at you, a puzzled expression on his face. 

“Sorry Steph could I talk to Steve for a second?” 

You stood in front of the pair, the alcohol making everything a little less daunting.

“Yeah, of course.” 

You smiled politely back at Steph before beckoning her partner to follow you. 

“What do you want?” He tried asking you but you had no response, only booming through Jeff’s house searching for a vacant room. 

Eventually you found a guest bedroom and guided Steve inside, closing the door behind him.

“What is going-” He was cut off by your lips slamming onto his, hands clutching at his face as you did what sober you could never dream of. 

It took Steve-O a moment to register what the hell had happened, but when he did he did not hold back. His mouth moved equally as eagerly, hands already gripping your waist and pushing you against the door. You pulled away for a moment just to take off your top, going right back to it afterwards, slowly edging towards the bed. 

Once the back of Steve’s legs hit the mattress you both fell onto it, him settling you to straddle him, his hands slyly moving up to your tits. Everything following moved fast, the remainder of your clothes were off and on the floor in a matter of minutes and before you knew it your legs were straddling over his crotch, him slowly pushing up into you.

You winced as he did so, eyes flashing up to meet his, the first time you had actually done that during your whole encounter. You were met with a look of almost adoration as he finally felt you, about a years worth of pent up hunger being fulfilled right then. You shut your eyes and brought your forehead up to rest against his own, his hands ghosting over your flesh. 

“What changed?” Steve-O whispered as you bottomed out, low whimpers leaving your lips.

You smiled, lifting your head up to look at him, beginning to move.

“Maybe I missed you trying to get into my pants, had to let you in myself.”

He laughed too.

“Good to know my hard work paid off.” 

You shook your head as you moved yourself up and down, laughing while panting. Steve helped you out, holding your waist and bucking his own hips forward, in time with your movements.

Soon you were properly fucking, both of you exchanging moans and low noises while you tried to keep quiet as there was a work party going on right outside the unlocked door. Something about the riskiness of it all excited you, egging you on to be a little louder to add to the thrill. He tried to keep you quiet with his lips but you continued to pull away and smirk as you moaned quite outwardly.

“You want us to get caught?” He muttered and you smiled.

“Would that be so terrible?” 

Steve-O just shook his head.

“One minute you're trying to get rid of me when I'm flirting with you and next you want everyone on set to hear you moan while I fuck you”

You laughed.

“I think it's more me fucking you.” 

“Oh fuck off.” 

You both laughed before Steve grabbed your hips and began moving you faster. You continued to let out noises of pleasure before you felt that feeling in your stomach begin to tighten. You gave no warning before you were coming on his cock, the tightening of your cunt urging Steve to the edge as well. 

“Fuck, where do you want me to come?”

“I’m on the pill.” You whispered.

Steve held onto your hips tightly, pushing you down before finishing inside of you with a loud moan. A moan that could’ve been heard from outside. 

By the time you had gotten off of Steve-O and put your clothes back on he was still oogling you as he remained on the bed.

“What?” You laughed, fixing your shoes.

“Oh nothing, I just never thought that would actually happen.”

You both shared a chuckle.

“So all that stuff with Steph...”

He shook his head.

“I was just trying to make you jealous, she’d never go out with me anyways.”

“Well I guess it worked.” You smiled and Steve did too.

“And Ryan?”

You shook your head in the same way.

“I like him but he knew it was gonna be you.”

The two of you sat in silence for a moment.

“So you actually wanna go out sometime?” 

You both laughed.

“Looks like we skipped a few steps.”

End.

@jackussy420 @gnarkillknoxville @lovexjoe @steve-osahottie @jackassvivalabam03 @kristinee

[asskickedbygirl]

He’s Not Here [Ryan Dunn x F!Reader]

Desc: You’re Dico’s sister and Ryan shows up at your house when he wasn’t around. You get to talking and turns out maybe not all of your brothers friends are assholes.

A/n: Remarkably the first proper Ryan fic I’ve written ?

Warnings: mentions of sex & alcohol

1.3k words

⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒ ⭒

It was Friday and you were home alone for once. Your friends had all bailed on you yet again so you were left to the old sweatpants and VHS tapes. As soon as you were settled on the couch, remote in hand ready to watch Thelma and Louise, your doorbell rang. You groaned, that better not be Brandon back already. You huffed and paused the film before it even began, getting up to answer it. You swung the door open, glaring the ringer until you realised it wasn’t your annoying older brother, but his cute friend, Ryan. Your eyes widened, embarrassed you had answered with such haughtiness. “Oh shit, sorry. I thought you were Brandon.” Ryan simply laughed you off. “It’s alright, so I take it he’s not here then.” You shook your head, suddenly very aware you were only dressed in old sweats and a tight fitting tank top. “He’s not but, he should be here in like half an hour if you wanna wait it out?” Ryan scratched the back of his neck and sighed, unsure. You admired his button nose and his blond hair. He was probably the cutest of your brothers friends. Sure there was Bam but he was just the asshole kid in your grade that used to make your life so very hard when he was still in school, along with Chris. You were constantly called stuck up and a smart ass just cause’ you weren’t failing every class but whatever. Ryan was pretty much the only nice one to you, but you still regarded him as a bit of an ass by association.

“Uhhh I don’t know.” You sighed at his response, opening the door wider to let him through. “Just come in.” He shrugged, and let himself wander in, scuffing his shoes off of the mat once you shut the door. Manners, who would’ve thought? You lead him in to your living room and gestured that he sat. “Beer?” You asked but Ryan just shook his head, sinking into the couch. You sat down on the opposite end and tucked your legs beneath you. “So what are you and Brandon doing?” Ryan laughed under his breath, “What?” You smiled, trying to understand the humour. “No it’s just, it’s kinda funny you call him Brandon. So formal.” You scoffed, “Would you rather I call him Dico as you guys have so graciously blessed him? Cause’ it’s a bit weird seeing as my last name is also DiCamillo if you haven’t forgotten.” Ryan shrugged. “It was just an observation.” The silence was awkward after that. Why’d you have to be such a dick all the time? “Sorry, I get defensive kinda quick.” Ryan nodded. “I think that just comes with having an asshole for a brother.” You spoke, laughing awkwardly. “He’s not always bad.” Ryan said and you shrugged. “Yeah I know. His friends kind of are though.” You looked up at Ryan, grinning stupidly. “Ouch.” He mouthed, mimicking a knife stabbing into his heart.

“Have to admit though, out of all my brother’s asshole friends, you’re probably my favourite.” Ryan smiled, you even thought you could see a blush creep up on his face. “Yeah?” You smiled and nodded silently. “Well for the record I never thought you were stuck up either.” You folded your arms and laughed. “Thanks so much, glad that’s still spreading around.” Ryan grinned. “Only by Dico, and sort of Bam and Raab too.” You shook your head, “God they were such assholes to me in high school.” Ryan’s face faltered, “I’m sorry about that. We were all kind of dickheads back then.” You shrugged. “Well I don’t cry myself to sleep anymore so, apology accepted.” Ryan’s face faltered even more if that were possible. “I’m sorry.” You laughed awkwardly. “I’m kidding, It was never that bad.” He sighed with relief. You bit your lip then, a bit of courage coursing through your veins as you shifted closer to the blond. “You know, I also always thought you were the cuter one.” Ryan let out a breathy laugh. “You’re on thin ice DiCamillo.” You smiled, “Bet that’s not the first time you’ve said that sentence.” Ryan bit his lip and shook his head. “Don’t remind me who you’re related to.” You pushed his hair off his forehead, moving even close to him now. “Whys that?” Ryan’s eyes flashed from your lips to your eyes. “Cause’ it’ll make what I’m about to do a bit more regrettable.” Then he leaned in and met your lips with his own, hand resting against your cheek.

You moved slowly in time with his lips, soft and plump. You shifted your body closer to his and brought your hand up to his jaw, brushing your thumb over it gently. Ryan began moving quicker now, opening your mouth wider to make out properly. Then he brought his hands down to your waist and moved you so that he was on top of you, never breaking the kiss. As he lay above you, hands tracing your neck you felt a swipe of his tongue on your lip and you opened, accepting it. You made out roughly with tongue, grasping his face to prolong it as long as possible. His hands wandered down to your tits, groping them softly through the material of your tank top. Your mind clouded, completely forgetting where you were as you reached down to undo Ryan’s belt, whimpering quietly into his mouth. Once you began unzipping his pants you heard the front door swing open and almost jumped out of your skin. Ryan quickly clambered off of you as you broke the kiss but it was too late. Brandon walked in on a hot make out sesh between his best friend and his sister.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” He yelled, still stood half outside, looking in at the two of you in the living room. Ryan quickly zipped up his pants and scrambled to buckle his belt once more which just made everything worse. “Why the fuck are you making out with my SISTER RYAN?! AND WHY THE FUCK IS YOUR DICK OUT?!” You adjusted your tank top and wiped Ryan’s saliva from your lips. “His dick isn’t out jesus christ.” Brandon slammed the door shut and darted into the room. “No! I will hear nothing from you! Ryan, what the fuck?!” You looked over to the poor guy who’s face was as red as a tomato. “I’m sorry. Look we weren’t… you know…” “Fucking?!” Dico interrupted, his hand gestures dramatic and exaggerated. “God it’s not that big a deal Brandon chill out!” Brandon shook his head. “No this is a big deal. I fucking knew you’d date one of them and now you’ve fucked it! She’s too young for you Ryan!” You snickered now despite the tension in the room. “I’m two years younger Bran.” Brandon shook his head, his anger fading slightly. “Doesn’t matter! You guys are fucking gross.” Then he stood awkwardly, not sure what to do after his dramatic meltdown. “Well, now just. Just don’t make out!” He turned his back then and headed to his room.

After hearing the door slam you couldn’t help but laugh. Properly laugh. Ryan looked less amused. You hit his arm playfully. “Don’t look like that, he’ll get over it.” Ryan shook his head. “He just walked in on me with my pants undone on top of you Y/n.” You giggled again, covering your mouth. “Ah it wasn’t that bad.” Ryan just looked at you, shaking his head. You leaned in and pecked him again, smile still playing on your lips. “Don’t tell me you regret it now.” Ryan smiled too, “Nah.” he kissed you again, your lips resuming the rhythm they once had. “FUCKING STOP!” Brandon had emerged from his room unbeknownst to you. You pulled away and both just laughed, even Dico looked a little amused. “I am going to smack both of you.”

End.

@jackussy420 @gnarkillknoxville @lovexjoe