#barely mentioned but yeah

[mrkgrl]

Can I still tag it with TW movie--- or uh... TW movie The Aftermath, maybe. I have so many more of these doodles/comics.

[sunglassesmish]

i hate this so much

[taakosleftshoe]

a retelling of the forever weed brownie comic by @punkitt-is-here, as inspired by @entguarde

[image description: a crudely drawn comic strip featuring drawings of merle highchurch and magnus burnsides from the adventure zone balance. merle is first shown holding a brownie up with his mouth open. magnus thinks "oh my god he's going to eat a weed brownie!!!!" magnus then zooms up and chomps the brownie, leaving merle in shock. the next panel shows merle coddling magnus's face, saying "WOW MAGNUS did you just eat my FOREVER WEED brownie?????" magnus looks very concerned. the next panel then shows a photograph of travis mcelroy dressed up as magnus, with him saying "the what." merle is then shown rambling on while magnus stares, mortified. merle says, "yeah my forever weed brownie!!!!! X3 i hope you don't wanna come down anytime soon cuz you're gonna be like that for a long time haha !!!!" the last panel shows merle in the corner smiling, saying "also i invited over all of the bureau and IPRE and everyone we've ever fought or met and they're all coming over for hours!!!! hope you can keep a straight face teehee :3 i believe in you haha just" and it cuts off as the text reaches the end of the image. magnus is drawn with downwards hatching as the dread sets in, looking absolutely terrified. end description]

[cucumbermoon]

What if Garak pulled a Spock? Like, ten years after Bashir moves to Cardassia, he comes home from a busy day at the hospital and Garak is having red leaf tea and laughing with some Cardassian guy Bashir has never seen before and Garak’s just like, “Oh, this is my brother.”

[emdotcom]

My'eah, some Sonic stuff I drew, playing with a different style!

Last 3 pages feature Terios, & the last page features Violet -- both are characters co-adored by @carnation-damnation !

[storybookstr4nge]

I bought and read the sun and the star today and..... nobody talk to me rn. I can TELL where mark oshiro pulled through for us. this book is so unapologetically queer, and melded with rick's always wonderful action sequences makes for such a lovely read... it really solidifies Will and Nico's chemistry and history and the wonderful way they love both romantically and as friends.... it never fell into the miscommunication trope even when the boys argued, and instead had them talk it out and be so transparent the whole way through...... it was so cavity-inducing-ly cheesy with just the right moments of incredible fluff and tragedy. I just love them. I love how dorky they are together. two cringe fail (affectionate) losers who are just so so smitten by one another and putting in a beautiful and mature effort towards loving one another the exact way the other needs to be loved. I am just so happy that this book exists within the riordanverse canon

[essektheylyss]

You know, with the fact that Ryn went and got herself petrified within a day of finding out just how willing the Ruby Vanguard are to fuck a wizard up, I do think that, while the bar is very low, Essek (as he is during the course of the campaign) really does deserve some credit for never ending up in such a self-imposed pickle that he needed his allied party to show up and save him from himself. In fact, the only time the Nein directly felt the need to worry about him was when Caleb put him in danger without thinking through certain connections that would be made, and even then, that was more of Caleb feeling guilt-ridden about it than actual worrying.

And to be very clear, Essek absolutely was and still to this day in canon is in a massive, self-imposed pickle, but when it actually comes down to it, the Nein were pretty tangential and superfluous to navigating that, and he's predominantly doing the work himself.

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

I would like to see alt gabriel from tmc monster

Now. Gabriel in this au. Is definitely. Different from my other aus. In the sense that. It’s not really a person.

Now, in this au, there is a forest on the outskirts of Mandela (St. Gabriel’s Forest) and it has some. Weirdness going on with it. It gets darker the further in you go, even if it’s day, there’s no animals or wildlife aside from plants, its cold no matter what season it is, and there are even plants that. Either are not meant to be in that area, or straight up do not exist anywhere else.

This forest is actually where mark got cursed, as the shadow entities that took over his body are found here. And right at the center of the forest, the source of all of it is a willow tree.

Called the “false Angel/savior’s Willow” more accurately. So basically. This tree is this aus Gabriel.

[majortomwaits]

my top 9 2023 watches, tagged by @wutheringdyke (thank you, dear!!)

i tag: @starringvincentprice @aheathenconceivably @repurposedmeatlocker @legallybrunettedotcom @milfjagger and @imperaptorfuriosa (if you guys want to, of course!)

my letterboxd, by the way

[utilitycaster]

I really hate how people are making Laudna’s arc the past few episodes about Imogen and a ship. People saying “this is what happens when you separate them!!!! Laudna lost her tether!!!” It’s really annoying. I wish people would just let Laudna be Laudna without Imogen. She’s her own person dealing with her own trauma. She’s been so much more enjoyable without Imogen and having to fake a sunshine happy face and without having to shoulder Imogen’s burdens. I don’t know if I’m making sense but it’s just annoying me.

Yeah it's...unsurprising, again, coming from the "oh but Marisha doesn't really mean it when she says things that would conflict with my personal desires, obviously," crowd, but it's really a disservice to Laudna as a character.

As was stated in the moment, Laudna felt a sense of control that she had so often lacked - which, by implication, means she felt this way during her time with Imogen as well! And then she admits to Prism that this feels like a loss of control as well, and Prism encourages her to embrace her feelings of confusion and ambiguity, and says it might be healing to do so. She's right! It was, again, a standout moment for Laudna and frankly one of my favorite Marisha moments across all campaigns, for her to grapple with this idea that control and power are really complicated and not a binary concept.

It's just...truly remarkable to watch the difference in Laudna's demeanor with Ashton, Orym, and Prism over the past few episodes vs. how she's behaved with Imogen. There's no front. She's allowed to express herself in an equal exchange, or receive comfort, rather than nearly always being the one to give and to put on a happy face and reassure everyone that everything will work out. The problem with constantly saying that the worse thing that ever happened to her already happened is not that it's necessarily false, but rather that she hasn't allowed herself to openly feel bad about anything lesser.

I think Laudna is in a rough spot right now! Like, do I care about the cringefail specter of Delilah, no, but I do care that Laudna has reawakened something that has hurt and controlled her in the pursuit of trying to gain a sense of control against someone else who hurt her, and I'm excited to see how she processes it, because right now it's trauma no matter what she does. I think it's movement forward, but like...the only way out is through and she's uh, really going through it. I really hope that given this development, with their reunion, Laudna will no longer feel this self-imposed obligation to serve as Imogen's validation at the cost of her own emotional well-being. I hope they can be honest and work through their issues, rather than slipping into their old carefully buttoned-up walking-on-eggshells status quo.

[sneetsnootyoit]

In His Bed

Dieter Bravo x gn!Reader

Summary: When you started working as Dieter Bravo's stylist, you were prepared for a diva with a drug problem. That's what you expected. You figured all you would be needed for was prepping him for awards shows and interviews, and occasionally used on movie sets. What you weren’t expecting was to find yourself in bed with him on more than one occasion, none of those occasions having anything to do with sex.

Warnings and shit: Drug use (obviously, it's Dieter), slight tiny bit of angst, lots of fluff, swearing, bad trip, mention of throwing up, alcohol use, crying NO USE OF Y/N

Word count: 4k

When you started working as Dieter Bravo's stylist, you were prepared for a diva with a drug problem. That's what you expected. You figured all you would be needed for was prepping him for awards shows and interviews, and occasionally used on movie sets. What you weren’t expecting was to find yourself in bed with him on more than one occasion, none of those occasions having anything to do with sex.

When you were hired, you had to give Dieter your phone number. You didn't think much of it, since he was your boss and not some creep at a bar asking for your number. At first, he only ever contacted you when he needed you to get him ready for an event, and every so often he'd ask you to get him styled up for a date (if he really wanted to get laid). When covid hit, he didn’t have a lot of excuses to go out, and he resorted to bothering his staff. Well, that’s what some of the other people on Dieter’s team considered it to be. You didn’t really mind it. It started off annoying, but eventually became just part of your job. You could even go as far as to say that you and Dieter started to become friends. Something you learned quickly was that Dieter hated calling people on the phone. Something about brainwaves. So when you got a call from him at three in the morning, you knew something was up. And this was how you ended up in his bed for the first time.

When you answered the phone, he called out your name in a trembling, whispered voice. He said something else you couldn't quite discern, and you pressed the phone closer to your ear.

"I'm sorry, I didn't understand you. Could you please repeat that, Mr. Bravo?" You replied blearily, trying not to sound annoyed.

"I fucked up. Need help."

That woke you up a little more; enough to make you perplexed as to why Dieter was calling you instead of Greg, his PA. "What? Sir, I'm sure Gr-"

"He quit. I called him and he quit. Please," he begged, sounding frightened. You'd never heard him sound that way.

“Where are you?”

He gave you the address and you typed it into your GPS, assuring him that you’d be there soon. You threw on a hoodie and some sweats, grabbed your keys, and headed out into the night. When you pulled up, you put the car in park and got out. It was a huge house in a neighborhood of other huge houses, and there were colored lights shining through the windows. You could hear the faint thrum of music from inside the house and the chattering of people inside. You looked around as you approached the door and you spotted Dieter huddled behind a car, looking like an animal hiding from a predator.

“Mr. Bravo?” You said quietly, walking slowly towards him. His head whipped around and his terrified eyes met yours. He was breathing heavily and clutching his jacket to himself tightly. “I’m here to take you home. You called me, remember?”

He nodded slowly, but didn’t move, so you helped him get up and walked him over to your car. When you began driving away, you watched him out of the corner of your eye, trying to figure out exactly what was going on. You’d never seen him this way, and you knew he wasn’t an overly paranoid person. He looked truly afraid, and you wanted to get him somewhere he could feel safe as soon as you could. You weren’t exactly speeding as you drove to Dieter’s house, but you weren’t following the speed limit either. Once you’d pulled up to his oversized house, you helped him inside and brought him to his bedroom, depositing him onto his bed with a sigh. Is this what Greg had to deal with? Maybe that’s why he quit… You turned to leave when Dieter grabbed your arm, hand shaking.

“Don’t leave me alone,” he begged, trying to pull you back toward him.

“Jesus, what did you take?” You asked, brushing his hand away and facing him. In the light of his bedroom, you could see just how dilated his eyes were, telling you he was definitely high on something.

“I…it was something new,” he murmured, and he started looking very pale. “I don’t-”

Before he could finish his sentence, his eyes widened and he made a beeline for the bathroom. You didn’t follow, mostly because you thought it would be inappropriate, then you heard the sound of him throwing up and you cringed. Instead of going to check on him, you went to his kitchen to grab a couple bottles of water, and you made sure the doors were locked. When you went back to his bedroom, you could hear Dieter calling for you from the bathroom.

“Sorry, I went to grab you some-”

“You left meeee” He groaned, slumped over the toilet with drool dripping down his chin and onto his shirt. He looked pathetic, and you honestly felt bad for him. You grabbed a couple washcloths from the linen closet in the bathroom, tucking one in your pocket and wetting the other. You walked over to him and flushed the toilet before you leaned over and wiped his face with the wet cloth. It was like caring for a child, and you honestly felt bad for him.

“You done in here or do you think there’s another round?” You used the dry end to clean his face a bit more before you opened one of the waters and held it up to his mouth, urging him to drink.

He only grunted in response as he slowly sipped the water, one arm hanging limp at his side while the other was draped over the toilet bowl, meaning you had to hold the bottle for him. You were about to ask him another question when he lurched forward and hung his head over the toilet, retching loudly while he gripped the edges of the porcelain for dear life. You shuddered at the sound and closed the water bottle, setting everything next to the bathroom sink. “Hold my hair,” Dieter gasped out, making you shake your head.

You knew what he meant, but it was still funny to hear. You approached him and brushed the hair away from his forehead, holding it back gently as his body expelled whatever it was that he took. After a while, he was reduced to just dry heaving, and when his body slumped over again, you cleaned his face and helped him get to his bed (you carried him). You helped him change into more comfortable clothes and actually put him to bed before you tried to leave again, and Dieter called out your name. “Don’t go…please.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want to be alone…I want you to stay,” he admitted softly, and it made your chest tighten. He reached out for you and you sighed, taking your shoes off so you could sit next to him on his bed. He didn’t seem satisfied by that, though, and you quirked an eyebrow at him. “Will you…”

“Will I what?”

Dieter seemed hesitant to say what he wanted to say, and he reached out to you, gripping your hoodie and trying to pull you closer to him. It gave you an idea of what he wanted, and you scooted closer to him. He moved his blankets so you would also be under them, and he moved himself closer to you, letting out a shaky breath. You cautiously wrapped an arm around his shoulders and he seemed to relax, fully leaning into you while he laid his head on your chest. You had to hold in the urge to laugh or chuckle, because never in your life did you think Dieter Bravo would be asking you to cuddle with him.

“So…something new?” Dieter nodded and shivered against you, making you instinctually bring him closer. “Bad trip?” He nodded again and you sighed, moving a hand to rest on his head without thinking. You didn’t realize you’d started running your fingers through his hair until you felt him physically melt against you and his breathing started to slow down.

“Fuckin’ scary. Definitely not taking that shit again,” he mumbled, leaning into your touch. You stopped when you realized, and his breath hitched. “I didn’t say you had to stop…please, don’t stop.”

You paused before you began carding your fingers through his hair again and you wrapped your other arm around him, hugging him closer. “Are you okay?” You’d heard things about bad trips and how scary they could be.

“I will be…haven’t had a bad trip in a while.” Dieter looked like he felt at home in your arms, but you could also tell that he was holding something back. “I lied, y’know…”

“Oh yeah? What about?”

“I didn’t call Greg. He didn’t quit…I just…I wanted you to come get me.”

That surprised you, and you looked down at him with an expression that matched. “Why? I’m not-”

“Because I like you…you’re nice to me.”

“You like me?” You asked incredulously, and Dieter looked at you, the thought crossing his mind that he may have made a mistake. He began trying to think of ways to explain his way out of the situation and blame it on the drugs, but before he could say anything else, you simply used the hand in his hair to push his head back down and you kissed him on his forehead. “I like you too,” you whispered, closing your eyes.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You weren't expecting to fall asleep with your boss in your arms, but it happened, and you were startled when you woke up in a bed that wasn’t yours. You had to replay the previous night in your head to make sure it wasn't just a dream, but then you noticed that your boss was still there, asleep in your arms.

He’s really cute when he’s asleep, you thought to yourself as you looked down at him. He looked calm and at peace. Something that you're not sure you ever got to see. You always wondered why he relied so heavily on drugs. Maybe you could ask him. You stayed that way for a while, just admiring him as he slept. You didn’t think much farther than that, so when Dieter awoke to you staring at him like he's the best thing you'd ever seen, he shot upright and looked at you like you were some bizarre fan who had broken in.

"What the fuck?! What are you doing in my bed?!"

You were startled by this and you moved back, furrowing your brows. "You asked me to stay with you, that's why. The fuck?"

"Why the fuck would I do that?" He spat, seemingly offended by the very idea that he would do such a thing.

"Because you went to a party, got too fucked up, had a bad trip, and called me to come pick you up. You said 'stay with me please' so I did. You said you wanted someone who would bring you comfort, and you told me that you liked me. And obviously you were so high out of your fucking mind that you forgot all of that shit," you spat back defensively, catching him off guard.

"I said that?" He asked, taken aback.

"Yeah. You told me that you didn’t call Greg because you wanted me instead…my apologies, I should have left as soon as you fell asleep and let you be alone. I'll be on my way. Hopefully we can forget this happened, that way I can keep my job," you replied, quickly removing yourself from the bed to find your shoes. You slid them on and began making your way through the house to the front door, taking deep breaths to keep yourself calm.

You didn’t expect Dieter to follow you, and you didn’t know he did until he called out for you and grabbed your wrist, turning you around to face him. "Listen, I-"

"Don’t. I understand. We all say things we don't mean while under the influence."

"But I did mean it. I…fuck, this wasn't supposed to happen. Not like this. I'm sorry, just- can we start over?"

"'Start over'? Start what over? This morning? Or everything? Because that would be a lot."

"Just this morning."

"Okay, fine." You weren’t sure what to expect when you agreed, but you were willing to try. You really didn't want to lose your job.

"Thank you for last night…" Dieter murmured, reaching for your hand. You almost pulled it back, but you allowed him to take it, and he studied it for a moment. "Are you hungry?"

"Huh?"

"I asked if you were-"

"No, I know! But why? I helped you, I did what you wanted. So now is the part where I leave, right?" You didn't want to risk opening yourself up to the thought that something happened between the two of you that night. You needed to get out of there before you ended up falling for him more than you already had.

"Because I don't want you to leave yet. This house is always so empty…it's nice to have another person here…especially when that person is you."

Fuck, that sounds so sad.

"Please stay. Let me get you breakfast. We can…talk. Just talk, you know?"

"Who are you and what have you done with my boss?" You asked jokingly. He looked hurt, and you realized that he was actually letting himself be vulnerable in front of you and you were shooting him down. You sighed and placed your free hand on his hip to pull him closer to you, wrapping your arms around him and placing a hand on the back of his head. "You really mean that shit, don't you?"

He nodded against your shoulder and you sighed again, leaning your head against his. "I want to stay like this forever," Dieter replied, so quiet you almost didn't hear him. "I'd give anything to stay like this."

"So, what? You'd give up meaningless sex with random people in exchange for being cuddled?"

"By you? Yeah."

You weren't expecting his response, but it made you feel warm inside, and your breath hitched when you tried to inhale deeply. Dieter tilted his head up to look at you, your eyes meeting briefly before you noticed his eyes flitting between yours and your lips. You hummed and leaned your face closer to his, kissing him softly. He fully leaned into the kiss and you could feel his whole body relax against you, just like last night. When you parted, you looked into his eyes again and smiled.

"So, breakfast?" He asked, nose brushing against yours.

"Yeah, breakfast."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Over the next few months, Dieter started to open up to you more, sharing details about his personal life and how things were before he got famous. At first, you were confused as to why he was sharing all these things with you, but after a particularly fancy dinner at his house, you realized that this was his attempt at dating. When you breached the subject with him, for the first time, you actually saw him get flustered. It was cute. But he confirmed your suspicion, and when he asked if that was okay, you told him it was. That was how you ended up dating your boss.

It was actually really nice. And you began to notice how he started to change. He did less drugs, and he stopped day drinking. It seemed like he was trying to be better for you, and when you told him you were proud of him for it, he nearly cried. He was hoping you'd notice.

The next time you ended up in his bed, it was after a red carpet event. You started offering your work to other celebrities for some extra money, and Dieter didn't seem to mind as long as you kept him looking good. It was a pretty great arrangement, and you were highly praised for your work.

Whenever Dieter had to travel for these events, he always booked you a separate room, but one that was close to his so you could go see each other after the events were over. You both knew how people loved to speculate about everything, and he didn’t want the paparazzi to catch on to your relationship. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of you, he just wanted you to be able to keep your privacy. Whenever you styled people for events, you usually didn’t accompany the actors to the event, but Dieter wanted you to be there for this one. You had to get three other actors ready after you finished up with Dieter, and afterwards, he insisted that you put on something nice so you could go with him.

When you arrived at the venue, you were practically buzzing with nerves, and Dieter tried to calm you as best he could while in a public setting. You still had no idea why he brought you. When it came time to start walking through and do the interviews, the first question people asked him was who you were. He introduced you by your first name only, and made a show of his outfit. "This is my wonderful stylist. They're the one keeping me so pretty for these things."

You beamed under the praise, and the interviewers seemed shocked. A few of them wanted to speak with you, mostly about how it was styling someone as eccentric as Dieter, and you tried to keep the details as vague as possible. Dieter deserved privacy too.

As the night went on, you were able to get a little taste of what actually went on at these events. It was pretty fun, but you kept to the side since none of it was really about you. Most people had no idea who you were, and that worked to your advantage until you remembered that with great praise over your work, also came hate. You always considered yourself to be someone who could take constructive criticism well, but what you heard wasn't what you were expecting.

Those who weren't making comments about how great you were at your job were talking shit, even going as far as to insult you for things that weren't even related. People accused you of sleeping with people to get booked as a stylist, and said that you put more effort into Dieter than you did any of the other actors who paid you to make them look good. One of them was someone you had styled for the event. You realized that half of the people you styled didn't even know your name. After a while, the hate seemed to overpower the praise that was floating through the air, and you decided that you couldn't take it anymore. You texted Dieter that you were leaving to go back to the hotel, and the driver would bring him back when the event finished up. Instead of going to your room, though, you went to Dieter’s. He had given you his extra key, and you knew that hotel staff always kept the celebrities' rooms stocked well.

As soon as you crossed the threshold of Dieter’s room, you started crying. You'd been holding back all of your emotions since you overheard the first few hateful words. You collapsed to the floor and stayed there for a while, stifling your sobs behind your hand just in case people walked by. After you'd managed to get your sobs under control, you got up and went to where Dieter kept his clothes. He never seemed to notice when you took his clothes, and if he did, he never said anything. You almost tore your clothes as you rushed to take them off, wanting to get into something comfortable as soon as you could. You took a t-shirt and a pair of sweats from Dieter's bag and put them on, eyeing the container he kept his weed in and the bag of 'brownies' he'd put in there before leaving for the event. You headed over to the mini-bar to make yourself a drink. You pulled out a few of the small bottles of liquor and opened them up, downing them immediately. You wanted to forget, and the only way you could think of that would aid you in doing so was getting fucked up. You took a few more bottles and went over to Dieter’s bed, once again looking at the edibles he had brought along. After a few more drinks, you reached the point of 'fuck it' and you took one of them, not thinking about how much he might’ve put in it, and you ate the entire thing. It wasn’t big, but you didn't think about how Dieter might put a shit ton of weed in his brownies. Luckily for you, he didn’t, but it was still enough to give you a comfortable high that left you feeling like you were floating. You had a few more drinks before your emotions hit you again and you curled up in Dieter’s bed crying quietly.

You were so out of it, you didn't hear your phone blowing up with texts, and you didn't hear Dieter come into the hotel room. You didn’t even know he was there until he was cupping your face in his hands and saying your name over and over.

"Hey, c'mon, answer me," he said softly, wiping your tears away with his thumbs.

"Mmm," you responded, hiccuping as you leaned into his touch. "What time is it?"

"About 1," he murmured, toeing off his shoes and climbing into the bed with you.

"Youuuu're missing the parties," you slurred, trying, and failing to look up at him.

"Rachel made me go to at least one of them, but I left early." Rachel was his publicist, and usually Dieter went to all the after-parties that happened when he went to an event. And he'd always return to the hotel fucked-up. It didn't occur to you that he left early because he was worried about you. "What happened? You didn't answer any of my texts."

"Was busy."

"Doing what?" He asked hesitantly, a little worm of insecurity crawling into his brain.

"This," you gestured around the room, trying to point out the bottles and crumbs from the brownie.

Dieter looked around, then his eyes fell to the drinks and crumbs. "Did you eat one of my edibles and get drunk?"

You nodded and he snorted in disbelief, under the impression that you were just an emotional drunk. He, himself, was high, and had no idea what you'd been dealing with. "Overwhelmed by the people?" He asked, pulling you close to him while you sniffled and shook your head.

"They hate me."

"What? No-"

"I heard so much…they think I fuck around for work and that I don't put effort in my job because I favor you," you told him in a quivering voice, holding back another onslaught of sobs. "Someone said they think I'm a shit stylist and you probably only keep me around for sex."

"What the fuck? Who said that?" Dieter demanded, raising your chin to make you look at him.

"I don't know, it was all overheard…stuff people said as they passed by." You pushed down a sob and gripped his suit jacket tightly. You didn't care if the provider got pissed off. You'd come up with an excuse later.

"Listen to me," Dieter said firmly, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. "Don't listen to those assholes, 'kay? You're fucking amazing. You make me look like a fucking god. If they can't appreciate your skill and how awesome you are, they can go fuck themselves."

You wished you could be comforted by Dieter’s words, but your thoughts were still swarming your brain and you were stuck in a fog. Dieter could see you were stuck, and he began pressing kisses down your face while he held you close, stroking your cheek with his thumb. He made sure he kissed every inch of your face, making you scrunch up your nose and giggle softly. Your lips were the last place he kissed, and he lingered there, allowing you to melt into him. His hands roamed your body in a comforting way, not grabbing or fondling, just exploring and caressing. "You deserve the world," he murmured, making your heart skip a beat. He'd never said anything like that, and you let out a quiet gasp. "You're perfect."

"Dieter," you whispered, catching his attention. He hummed in response and you pressed your forehead to his. There were words hanging in the air between you, and you didn't know if you were quite ready to say them, or if Dieter was ready to hear them.

"Yeah, me too," he responded, kissing you gently.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Amazing."

IF YOU WANNA SEE MY SHIT IT'S ON AO3 >HERE<

[cirrus-grey]

I know it's kind of the point, the passions of man versus the indifferent cruelty of nature, but it is amazing to me how much the Whale in Moby Dick just does not give a fuck.

The whole book sets it up as this malicious, intelligent demon that has it out for humans and wants to kill them all, and then when the Pequod finally catches up to it it's just... puttering along, enjoying the weather, having a grand old time. Even after they attack it and it destroys one of the boats it just kind of sits in the water nearby swatting at debris with its tail and ignoring them. Even at the end, the final destruction of the ship and deaths of all the crew, it kind of just has this attitude of like. Hey. You. I thought I told you to fuck off. Like -

Ahab: From Hell's heart I stab at thee!

The Whale: Oh, not you again. 🙄

[bluezeri]

rambling about connor and noah to my friend who doesnt even know whta im talking about so i figured i should post it here

plus ao3 link if anyone wants to read it on there

anyway heres the actual rambling below the cut

Thinking about the things Horror!Connor said to Noah before anyone knew he was a horror. Thinking about how over the past year Noah had well and truly come to believe that this was the only person to see the good in him other than Devon (who was currently a ghost and the person he "murdered" so he doesn't really count). thinking about how even though he got his boyfriend killed, Connor had come to love him anyway. He really, really came to believe over many months of convincing that Connor loved him 

and then,,,, they revived Devon, and everything was fine for about 2 days. And then Devon woke up, and connor was acting weird, and then everything Connor had previously tried to convince him of came crashing down when Connor started lashing out at him, telling him he had murdered devon, that it was his fault. he didn't even- he didn't even know what to do, what to think 

he didn't even get time to process it anyway, because 3 hours laters he's staring at connor chained to a chair in the basement, practically frothing at the mouth, skin pale and veiny, and his eyes no longer that grey-blue shade he loved so much, instead a sickly bright cyan that pierced straight through his soul. All he could do was grip Devon's hand tightly, as they both vowed to save Connor

Noah loves Connor, so, so much. he didn't think he could love anyone as much as Devon, but here he was, after realising that connor does actually blame him for Devons death (<- he doesn't, but Noah is unreliable narrator of the year <33) and still doing everything in his power to save him 

Hey, he owed him that much, didn't he?

–

Connor remembers it

his descent into being a horror was weirdly slow, and no one ever really figured out why. but he could remember hearing thoughts that weren't his- violent thoughts, thoughts that scared him

he brushed them off though, they had enough to worry about, and he figured this was just his way of processing his moms death

 by the time he realises, it's too late to stop. he hates it, can't stand the voices invading his mind. he tries to fight it, he really does, but before he knows it, his mouth and throat are working together to curse Noah out against his will, telling noah the opposite of what he's been trying to convince Noah of for months, undoing all love he's tried to give to noah, that he's only just recently managed to convince he was deserving of

he wants to cry, except he can't, as the power takes over. and like before, he can only watch as he threatens not only his friends, but the two people he loves most in the world

 and then things get hazy. And then he's so angry. He's so angry that he finally manages to break the chains binding him. He sees Noah, registering the pure fear on his face, and laughs at it. but Noah was not his priority. He wanted the bastard that killed his mother, and he got him. 

found him, eventually, he's not really sure where, nor does he really care. He ripped his heart out, threw it against whatever wall was nearby (a cave? when did he get in a cave??), and then– 

he could sense them. his sweethearts. the ones he promised an cruel and painful death 

he raised his head, trying to find them with his eyes first. but his vision was hazy too, bathing everything in anger and hate and blood, and then... noah was there 

he didn't really register him at first. didn't register much of anything except kill kill kill- but he recognised that- that voice. 

that voice that spoke so softly, so gently to him, like.... when they cooked together, and noah was trying to teach him how cut vegetables correctly without chopping his own fingers off, or like when they were rewatching some shitty horror movie for the 5 time that week, making fun of the terrible cgi and stupid character 

and then his hands appeared. soft, barely calloused from handling weapons, long, bony fingers. raised in a gesture of peace and surrender. he liked holding them, he remembered. he likes rubbing his thumbs over his knuckles to calm him down, and liked when they linked their pinkies together, with burning ears and cheeks, avoiding each other's gaze and then giggling about it like idiots 

and then... through the haze, he could make out a face. Noah's face. the face that he's woken up to for the past 3 months, kissed even longer than that, and pined for even longer than that. the face that scrunches adorably no matter when he's in. the face that- that he loves and holds and hes doesnt want to hurt

and the noah must see his rage filled expression softening out into confusion despite the darkness of the cave, calls out his name worriedly, and rushes to catch him as rowans powers finally cleanse him 

he doesnt think about the things he's done, he’ll save that crisis for a later date. Instead, he only looks up at Noah with tired, wet eyes. 

"i love you." he barely croaks out, and noah looks back at him, with that scrunched up face, cheeks wet with tears that he desperately wants to reach up and wipe away if it weren't for his current lack of strength, and he responds by cradling Connors face and saying "I love you, too." and then connors eyes fall shut, and slips into unconsciousness

[sysig]

Charm(s) meet Charm Bear (Patreon)

[suckishima]

thinking about what an insane opportunity this is for the first years at this camp. the full extent of it only hit me this time around but like, yeah ushijima is a super cool player that they all know and revere as almost a celebrity (and deservedly so ofc, he's nationally ranked and is on THE youth national team), but more than that, by this point in time he's done playing high school volleyball. if their schools didn't play him during prefecture qualifiers, they never had a chance to play against him and never would (other than goshiki and the shiratorizawa ball boys), and now because they were invited to this camp they get to play against him, watch his nuances in real time, feel the sting of his serves on his arms, and ask him questions, learn from him, learn what it truly takes to be on his level

and now i'm thinking about how every single character (except kunimi) from a previously named school who is at this camp eventually goes on to play professional volleyball 😭😭😭 like wow how much of that had to be from ushijima's impact and the opportunity that washijo let them have here. it really is about connecting on and off the court. insane INSANE

[the-fear]

I wish we all could discuss how amatonormative fandom spaces can be without claiming that shipping canonically aspec characters is akin to “erasing” their canon identities. Because as someone who is both aro and greatly supports the idea of “ship and let ship”, holy shit is it sometimes uncomfortable to go into the aromantic tag when people don’t realise the difference between fanon/headcanons and canon.

Newsflash: someone shipping an aspec character doesn’t mean that they don’t respect their canonical identity, and headcanons aren’t static things that the holder thinks is automatically better than canon!