#because for years now they keep showing up in my sink and my bathtub and my desk and my bED CRAWLING ON ME AT NIGHT

[densewentz]

decided to start using a cricket ambient noise in my room all the time hoping it'll make the actual crickets think there are already many horrible crickets in my room so they'll stop coming in here to ruin my life

[mxlktxa]

birthday girl

moder!au pairing; ellie williams x fem!reader cw; language, (brief) 18+ content , alcohol use, modern!au, (brief) underage drinking (reader is turning 20, while ellie is 22) an; i only did this cuz my bday was yesterday (may 5th) ༄ؘ ۪۪۫۫ ▹▫◃ ۪۪۫۫ ༄ؘ

I placed my keys and bag right at the front door, leaning against the front door to mentally prepare myself for whatever Ellie had planned for my birthday today.

"Ellie!" I called out, knowing she had to be somewhere in our shared apartment, "I'm home, Ellie!"

"Don't any of turn the lights on. Just come to the bedroom," her voice came from down the hall, exactly from our bedroom.

My legs carried me through the dim hall, passing by the closed bathroom, a bit annoyed as it looked as though she left the light on in there. Jesus, our utility bills are gonna be so fucking crazy, I can feel it.

"El?" I called out to her again, not seeing her anywhere in the room. Not because it was dark, there were a few candles lit in the bedroom, a bunch of different flower petals all over the floor and plenty more on the bed. On either side of the bed, there were an almost absurd amount of 'Happy Birthday!' balloons, which of course made me giggle at them.

"Hey, baby," Ellie kissed on the nape of my neck, a glass of wine entering my peripheral view on both sides of me, "happy birthday, gorgeous. Got you a drink."

"Ellie, I'm a minor," I joked, biting my lip and turning to face up at her. She rolled her eyes before handed me the drink anyways.

"Ugh, shut up and take the damn drink. No one's here to bust us."

"You're going to jail," I whispered, keeping eye contact with the woman in front of me as I took a sip from the cup handed to me. Ellie chuckled and did the same, her hand reaching for my waist and looking me up and down a few times.

"Why's the bathroom light on?"

"It's not."

"Then why's there light coming from beneath the-"

"One thing at time princess," Ellie chuckled, "Take these clothes off, I'll show you why the 'light' is on," Ellie took both our glasses, placing them on the nightstand on her side of the bed before coming back to me and slowly starting to strip.

"Oh, you were serious," I raised a brow, following her lead.

"Of course I was serious. Keep your bra and panties on though."

"Oh, but you can walk around without a bra on?"

"I have no fucking tits. What do I need to wear a bra for?"

I pouted at Ellie, tossing my shirt at her and unbuttoning my jeans, "whatever. Whore."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me, you whore," I giggled, putting my hands on her chest as she closed the distance between us, smirking and letting her hand latch onto my hips.

"I dare you to say it again."

"No. I'm good on that," I smiled up at her, doing my best to keep my eyes on her.

"Pussy," Ellie nodded, "take your pants off, let's go," the freckled woman, left to the bathroom without me which sent me into a bit of a panic and I nearly died taking my pants off.

After a little bit, I found Ellie bent over the bathtub, dumping a handful of bath salts into the bubbly water. I also noticed the candles on the sink, the toilet and the two front corner of the tub. On the mirror, the words 'one year left until you can buy alcohol... legally' was written in pink dry erase marker.

A giggle left me as Ellie turned to me and gently tugged at my undergarments, asking to peel them off me. I gave her the green light, watching as she kneeled down, a little too excited to undress me.

"You're so pretty, baby. So pretty."

"I know. You told me about eight million times today, Ellie."

"That's not enough."

"It is for me."

"Yeah, to you. Not me," Ellie tossed them to the side, standing up so she could undo my bra now, "I didn't know if you wanted a bubble bath or just bath salts so I did both for you. Get in, the water is boiling, just how you like it."

"Oh, how thoughtful," I scoffed, watching Ellie now completely undress herself and then help me in the tub with her. I took her hand, sitting in front of her and her behind me, of course.

Right off the bat, Ellie started massaging my back, leaving a trail of kisses every now and again. Her hands would sometimes find their way to my thighs or breasts but she would hesitantly pull away, replacing her lewd actions with kisses and more massages.

"Just do it, babe. I deserve it. Work was stressful and it's my birthday."

"Thank fuck," she huffed, instantly going to grope my tits and kiss the side of my neck, "I've been waiting way too long for you to get home."

"I can tell," I grinned at her comment, shutting my eyes while she had her little fun, "No ice cream cake?"

"It's in the freezer."

"Mmm, we're not lighting it tonight are we?"

"Definitely not, sweetheart," Ellie huffed, biting down my shoulder and moving her hands down to my thighs, kneading them like dough, "fuck, I missed you all day, you don't understand. My favorite birthday girl."

I wanted to respond, truly but Ellie was dipping her toe into an exhilarating trance and I followed right beside her. Her little grunts and groans were not helping either of us leave this rapture. Her long fingers had slipped inside of me, sending a shiver down my back and a soft gasp leaving me. I could feel her lips curl into a grin on my shoulder. Ellie was definitely going to start acting like a dickhead, she was already too far in. That was until we were startled by a knock on the door.

"The fuck?" we spoke in sync, Ellie hugging me close to her rather than attempting to move, "did you invite anyone over?" I muttered, removing her hands and getting out of the tub.

"No. Dina, Joel, and Jesse said they'd come over but I told them not to."

"You know they don't listen to anyone, damn it," I rolled my eyes, handing Ellie a towel as she stepped out after me and went to the room, I assumed to get us robes.

"I'm sorry. I was truing to give you a good birthday present. But these jackasses-."

"Minus Joel!" I cut Ellie off, punching her shoulder and pulling her away from the closet so I could look through it.

"Fucking, excuse you!" Ellie laughed, damn near putting me in a head lock as she walked me to the bed, "Don't be a little shit! Your birthday doesn't exclude me beating your ass!"

I squealed a bit before getting out of her grasp and crawling on the bed. Ellie climbed on top of me, starting to playfully land some punches on me.

"Stop it! I'm cold, it's cold! Get me a robe, Ellie, please, I'm sorry!" I yelped, blocking her and kicking my feet in the air.

"Say you're sorry! Admit you were wrong!"

"Okay, okay! I'm sorry! I was in the wrong, now get me some clothes, I'm freezing!"

We lied on the bed laughing for a bit before Ellie got up, finding me some lacey underclothing, shorts and one of her tops and jackets. I quickly got dressed so I could watch her get dressed.

"Go blow out the candles, drain the tub. I'm gonna open the door."

"Are you forgetting something?" I backed my ass into Ellie's hip, glancing back at her as she raised a brow at me actions. Her hand raised slightly then came down harshly, leaving a crazy sting on a single cheek.

"Nope! No, complaints! Go do what you were told," Ellie spoke as I opened my mouth to cry about how hard she had spanked me, "I'll kiss it after they leave. But the longer you take to blow out those candles-."

"The longer it's gonna take for things to go my way, yeah, yeah, yeah."

"Atta girl," Ellie chuckled, kissing my forehead before going to blow out the candles lit in our room then leaving to open the front door.

Fuck Jesse and Dina. Love Joel, of course. He gets a pass.

[irisintheafterglow]

Need (college au!sakusa x you)

summary: passion is a passing thing, accidental chemistry. it's not what you two are at all. (or, you get wasted at a party and the only thing in your mind is him)

wc: 2.28k

cw/tags: childhood best friends to strangers to lovers, angst/fluff with a happy ending, mentions of drinking and parties including being drunk and vomiting, pet name (gorgeous), a tasteful amount of self-loathing (if you can call it that, it's just angst), swearing/explicit language, mutual pining

note: taylor swift lyric title cuz yk it's a signature at this point. also i was throwing around this idea with either suguru or bakugo but i could not get omi out of my mind for the life of me. hope you enjoy!

likes, reblogs, and feedback are always appreciated!

“Hello?”

“Remedy.” The silence from the other end of the phone is so suffocating, you think he hung up. The thought sends another wave of emotion rolling through your body and you’re shaking, again, in the corner wedged between the toilet and the bathtub. 

“What?” His voice is strained but just as smooth and low as you remember. Your empty chest aches even more. 

“Remedy,” you plead, head spinning from the fluorescent lights of the bathroom. “Remedy, remedy, remedy, remedy, remedy.” It’s the only thing you can repeat at this point, too overwhelmed to think of anything else. Everything was distorted and hazy, like your eyes were looking into two differently-patterned kaleidoscopes. His voice is the only thing keeping you grounded, at this point. 

“Where?”

“Party on 18th and 40th, in the bathroom. Can’t miss it,” you relay, incredibly ashamed at how easily your words slur together. He hangs up abruptly and your phone clatters into the mystery-stained bathtub. Disgraceful. The whole situation was embarrassing beyond belief–calling your childhood best friend turned stranger to tell him that you got wasted and the only thing you could think about was him. Part of you hoped he wouldn’t show up, hoped that he would confirm the theory in your mind that he hated you now. Minutes felt like ages while you continued to occasionally dry heave into the toilet and grimace through the blinding pounding in your forehead. He’s not coming, you realize as you try to stand on gelatinous legs. And why would he? He doesn’t know you anymore and you don’t know him. He’d never be found in a place like this, anyway. 

Or, so you thought. 

The bathroom door is shut with a forceful kick below the handle. “Easy, easy,” he cautions, grabbing your forearms to support you. Every nerve in your body can feel where his palms meet your skin and it’s intoxicating, more than anything already in your system; any fearful paranoia riddling your body dissipates when you register his presence. The sound of his voice murmuring your name floats into your ears like a drug and your knees give out at the sudden feeling of safety. He delicately sits you on the marble of the sink, careful to make sure you don’t lose your balance as he scans your face and body. Standing between your legs like this, he was in closer proximity to you than he had been in years. You’d forgotten how handsome he was in person, drastically different from the faded image you tried to retain in your mind. 

“Hi, Omi,” you drawl dopily, tilting your head to the side and smiling. He can’t help huffing out an incredulous laugh at your mood switch. 

“Hey, gorgeous. Are you hurt?” You slowly shake your head from side to side and he nods, eyebrows still drawn in concern. Even in your intoxicated state, you can tell how flustered he is because he seems to have no idea where to put his hands. They take turns disappearing as he crosses his arms, muscle flexing under his jacket, and then uncrosses them. He settles for putting them on either side of yours, gripping the edge of the counter. “Wanna tell me why you’re shitfaced in a frat house?” You hum in thought, rotating your neck carefreely and your face starts to burn as his fingers gently pull your chin back to face him. 

“Went with the roomies.”

“The same ones from first year?” You nod, your vision slightly starry. “They’re not good for you, idiot.”

“Oh, you think I don’t know that?” The corner of his lip turns down into a frown at your sudden attitude. “Where the fuck else am I gonna live?” His body abruptly pulls away like he was offended. He starts to make his way back to the door and another wave of dread sinks into your gut.

“Look, if you’re gonna make me come all the way over here just to–”

“He looked like you.” It makes his voice halt in his throat, your words. His hand is frozen as it hovers above the handle and he looks at you over his shoulder. Your face falls a little further, voice unsteady. “He didn’t act like you, though.” He stiffens like he wants to say something, but his jaw stays clenched while he takes you back into his arms and drapes his jacket over your exposed shoulders before guiding you out of the house. The warmth from his jacket and the lingering smell of his cologne continue to help ground you back into the present. While you’re navigating the raging crowd to the exit, he’s careful to stay as close to you as possible without hindering your movement, glaring daggers into any guy that approaches. It felt like a fever dream, having Omi at a party with you when he’d sworn off these kinds of scenes for as long as you’d known him. 

“I’m not that interested in slowly annihilating my liver. Probably isn’t good for Olympic prospects,” is what he said when you asked him if he was going to party in college. The sun was dipping below the neighborhood’s houses while you sat together on the roof of Omi’s, a tradition you picked up starting in middle school. It made your heart hurt a little bit, whenever he talked about going pro in volleyball. You noticed the change over the course of high school, how he canceled plans for a last-minute training camp or stayed so long after practice that you would just walk yourself home. You knew it made him happy and fulfilled the hunger of his competitive side, but it was still saddening to watch your best friend slip away little by little. “Why? Are you going to ragers every weekend?” You scoff and roll your eyes, taking another sip from your soda to avoid answering the question. Still, he’s watching you; you can tell from the corner of your vision and you shrug. 

“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll try one just to get grossed out by it and then never do it again.” He gives you a rare chuckle, breathy and low. His smiles and his laughs, however stingy he was with them, were just as beautiful as the rest of him. It made your chest ache even more. 

“Well, in the event that you’re so wasted you can’t see straight, call me.” Your first instinct is to laugh but you fight down the urge when you see the thoughtful expression on his face. “I’ll come get you and make sure you’re not with some douchebag.”

“Mmm, my hero,” you tease and he gives you a lightheartedly annoyed look. “What if you’re, I don’t know, in practice or something?”

“We can have a code word.”

“A code word?”

“Yeah, so that I know if it’s really important.”

“You wouldn’t get me if you didn’t think it was important?” It’s supposed to be a joke, but something shifts in your expression that makes you feel guilty for asking something so unlike him. 

“I’ll get you every time, no questions asked.” 

True to his word, he didn’t end up asking a lot of questions. When you were through the front door, his hand covered the top edge as you ducked into the passenger seat of his car. You still felt like you were in a daze while he drove, leaning your head against the window and staring off at the passing streaks of yellow and white. The quiet between you two was stifling, nothing like the late-night drives you made him take you on when neither of you could sleep. It was unsettlingly cold and you pulled his jacket tighter around your body, sinking further into the leather seats. 

“I’m not taking you back to your dorm,” he states blandly. Tension riddled his body ever since he found you in the bathroom and all you wanted was for him to relax. How could he, though, if you were on the verge of vomiting again in his car? 

“I know.” It’s all you can muster out of the pure shame covering your body like a rash. You trusted him and knew where he was going, but it still didn’t give you relief. “I’m so sorry.”

“I know you are. You couldn’t get one of your friends to take you home?” His voice and expression are both unreadable, intentionally blank to not give away his inner thoughts. There it is, you think. There’s the loathing he feels toward you for being another weight on his back. You’re careful with your words and they barely come out as a whisper. 

“I didn’t want them.” His attention flicks to you for a moment, like he doubted the sincerity of your answer. His eyebrows raise in mirthless disbelief.

“But you wanted me?”

“I needed you.” He shakes his head; he didn’t believe you.

“There’s a difference.”

“Not to me.” 

The shame continues to rise around your body like water and you’re sinking in it, struggling to breathe while emotions threaten to spill from bloodshot eyes. But, even more, the shame is distorted by an unshakeable feeling of confusion. You didn’t know how he felt about you, nor did you really understand how you felt about him. The last time you spoke was months ago and yet you let go in his presence as if nothing had changed. It was driving you out of your mind, not knowing what he was thinking. The feeling stays stagnant in your body even after you shower at his apartment, in his bathroom with his body wash. He leaves one of his old jerseys for you to wear, saying his bed is yours for the night. Everything smelled like him, familiar and nostalgic. Everything was telling your brain that you were safe, so why weren’t you able to relax? 

His head pokes through a crack in the door to check on you right before you turn his bedside lamp off. You’re wrapped in his blankets and wearing his clothes, but everything about your situation just felt wrong. He can see it in your face, too, and respectfully has a seat on the edge of the bed next to you. 

“Talk to me.”

“I don’t know how anymore,” you mutter pathetically into his pillow. He exhales deeply, rubbing his eyes and you expect him to leave you right there. It’d be too much work for him to unpack exactly what was going on. 

“You said there was a guy that looked like me,” he offers. You merely hum in assent, still too disgusted with yourself to look at him. In contrast, his voice is a patient plea for you to keep talking. "Why'd he matter?"

“I kissed him and pretended he was you.” Sneaking a glance at his face, you find it completely blank, the only sign of emotion being the miniscule widening of his eyes. “His hands started to wander, though, and I just knew. I knew he wasn’t you.” 

“How did you end up in the bathroom?” His words are strained and shaky, but neither of you will look at each other.

“Threw up. It felt gross, kissing him.” Kiyoomi breaks for a millisecond, his face contorting in anguish before schooling itself back into blankness. “It felt gross to kiss him because he–”

“Because he looked like me,” he finishes, unable to mask his sorrow. Something clicks in your mind and you sit up pencil-straight, suddenly completely sober. 

“No.” You don’t attempt to hide the urgency in your tone while you slide closer and place your hand on his shoulder. He flinches but doesn’t pull away. “Because he wasn’t you at all, Omi. He wasn’t who I wanted, nor who I needed.”

“And who is it that you want? Is it the same as who you need?” He’s finally looking at you, eyes softer than you’d ever seen. Whether purposeful or not, both of your bodies had shifted closer to each other as if they were stuck in each other’s orbit. 

“It’s been the same for as long as I can remember, even when he disappeared for a little bit,” you confess and you attempt to give him a smile. He’s completely speechless at what you’re implying, and his reaction is enough to tell you that he feels the same. 

“And…would you let him stay with you for the night? To make up for lost time?” His knuckles hesitantly brush your cheek in question. You take his hand in yours and press a feather-light kiss to his fingers in answer. 

“As long as he promises not to disappear again.”

“He won’t,” he states with finality while he pulls you back into his bed, pulling you into his chest as naturally as breathing. He sighs into the top of your head when you’re flush against his body, the tension you felt earlier gradually dissipating. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you more.”

“That’s not possible. I fell first, after all.” You can hear the smirk in his words even as your eyes flutter shut. You pull whatever energy you have left in the tank to respond to his quick remarks. It doesn’t last for long when you feel sleep start to tug at your mind. 

“And I fell harder. Who’s winning now, hmm?” 

“I still am. Look who I have in my arms right now.”

“Your athlete is showing, Omi,” you murmur on the verge of passing out. His fingers tracing swirls on your skin through his jersey wasn’t helping your fight to stay awake. 

“Rest, then; we have a lot to catch up on in the morning.” 

“Promise you won’t leave.”

“I promise I won’t let you go.”

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[lavenderstars-blog]

Unexpected | Kylian Mbappè

Pairings: Kylian × reader [oc].

Summary: You are pregnant unexpectedly, Now you and kylian are expecting your third child. Your journey of giving birth to your unexpected baby who looks like a perfect mixture of you and kylian.

Tags: #kylian ×reader[oc]#fluff #dad kylian #Big family #Mbappè family #pregnancy journey #baby boy# siblings # kylian fanfic # mention of birth #regular check up.

You are currently in your bathroom sitting on the edge of the bathtub waiting for the result. Beads of sweat forming on your head you are stressed about the result.

You have been experiencing some symptoms like dizziness, nausea and food cravings, and it looks like pregnancy symptoms so you decided to take a pregnancy test.

You and kylian got intimate last time was when your kids were at their grandparents house for a sleepover it was around a week ago.

If you turned out to be pregnant it would be unexpected since this was not planned and it would really change a lot of things.

Lots of thoughts are going inside your brain right now. You didn't really told kylian that you are taking a test because you didn't really want to get his expectations high.

As you were thinking all of this the alarm which you set ringed indicating its time to check the test. Your heart beats fasten.

With your trembling hands you picked up the pregnancy test, your eyes brimmed with tears.

You gasped after seeing the two lines indicating that you are pregnant again, and your palm went to cover your mouth, tears fell from your eyes. You couldn't imagine that you are going to be a mother again.

Your baby is in your womb, you placed your hands on your stomach.

"mumma loves you my baby. "

You quickly washed your hands in the sink and took the pregnancy test with you outside the restroom. You went to kylian with the pregnancy test in your hand.

You showed the pregnancy test to kylian at first he was confused on why do you have a pregnancy test but then he realized and asked you, confirming his doubts if its true that you'repregnant To which you nodded in response.

Yn: We're going to be parents soon. Kylian hugged her tightly and kissed all over her face and in the last he crouched down and placed a gentle kiss on her stomach caressing it and saying.

Kylian: Come soon my little champ, dadda is waiting for you.

Kylian kissed you on your lips saying he is the luckiest person to have you and his kids.

_________________________________________

It's been 6 months when you got to know about your third pregnancy.

Your kids were so excited for a little sibling, but they were very impatient it took a lot of time for you and kylian to make them understand that their sibling will come after nine months.

Your eldest is currently six years old and your middle one is three years old and the youngest is on his way.

When you guys told your family about this they were shocked. But everyone was very happy.

Today is your doctors appointment, you got ready with kylian, today the kids grandma is coming to babysit them so you and kylian left for the clinic.

When you guys reached there you felt very anxious and nervous because of the pregnancy hormones.

Seeing you anxious kylian held your soft hands and assured you.

The doctor was doing your check up, she applied the gel on your stomach, you felt the similar cold feeling, she was doing your ultrasound, kylian held your hand.

She asked if we wanted to know the gender of the baby. I looked towards kylian and then we both declined, saying we would like to keep it as a suprise.

It was same with both your kids, you guys didn't wanted to know the gender of your baby beforehand.

So when gave birth you got to know the gender of your baby.

She nodded and prescribed me some medicine and told me to take alot of rest. And assured us saying that the baby is perfectly fine.

_________________________________________

It's the time you need to gave birth, your water just broke.

But both you and kylian are calm, Beacause you guys have experienced this two times before.

Since it's your third time you know what will happen that's why your very calm.

You and kylian got into the car and drove off to the hospital. Your parents were taking care of your kids at home.

~~

You just gave birth an hour ago, you gained your conscious just now and saw kylian sitting beside your bed, you asked him about the baby and he said the doctors have taken him for the check up.

You gave birth to a little boy, he looks a little like you and a little like ky. You can say he is a perfect mixture of you both. Another symbol of your love.

His eyes are the exact copy of you with honey brown colour, and his hair is just like kylian, which you love caressing so much.

The nurse came with your baby and gently gave him to you.

She said the baby is very healthy. You and kylian were observing your little baby. You carresed his face and kissed him on his cheeks and forehead.

His face looked so calm, you wish you could stop this moment here.

The nurse asked you both, regarding the naming of the baby. " And what did you guys decided "

Kylian and yn both stared into eachothers eyes, communicating through their eyes, and they whispered softly. "Kyle mbappè "

In hearing the name, the baby Kyle opened his eyes, fluttering them, making his parents heart filled up with contentmant.

Kyle's older siblings are on their way to meet their little brother.

You informed your parents and they are coming to the hospital with the kids. The kids are very excited to meet Kyle. They were thrilled to know their baby sibling has arrived after making them wait for so long.

The nurse said the baby needs skin to skin contact, kylian nodded at her, nurse left to give them privacy, as kylian removed his shirt and placed it properly, and came to you, you carefully passed kyle to him.

He took Kyle and placed him on his chest, holding gently, so to not hurt him. While you were admiring this beautiful scene infront of you. Kylian as a father always made you feel something which you can't describe in words.

Kylian was always best dad, but a strict one too. He loved spoiling the kids, but he was always the first in disciplining them.

Kylian was there for you in everything, if it would be possible he would have taken your pain also which you felt while giving birth.

You were recommended bed rest by your doctor in your last two months. Kylian helped you in everything. He was there with you even in the slightest things.

You guys never really thought of having a third child but guess what this is what life is unpredictable. But you are glad, because you get to experience this again.

[loquaciousquark]

My dog is getting old. This has happened to everyone in the history of the world who has ever loved a dog.

It's my turn, horologically speaking, to watch age catch up to him. I keep trying on the grief to see how it fits. Today I'm more sanguine; today I'm remembering the good days and the good years. The lump in the throat still hurts.

It's hard for him to stand up now on the bad days. Especially in the evenings, especially when a few hours ago he'd flung himself wall to wall with joy when I got home from work; and especially first thing in the morning when he wakes stiff as a board in the hips. On the good days he can still take the four stairs up to the living room in one light-speed jump when he's on a tear, though he trusts the kitchen linoleum much less than he used to. Today's a bad day. Yesterday was worse.

There's a faint discolored patch on my quilt where he sleeps. Right side, foot. It took half a decade to show up, and every few months I give it an extra soak in a bleach-filled bathtub. It still never really goes away; besides, he puts it right back on. Not tonight, though. Tonight he sleeps in the front room, because the stairs up to me are too hard. He watched me go up tonight without him and his tail drooped so low it touched the floor. He's only been mine eight of his eleven years, but I was there when he came home the first time, when he was exactly eight weeks old. I held him up in one hand like a waiter's tray and it was easy. He's ninety pounds now and I can't help him much at all.

German Shepherds are prone to hip dysplasia. Half-breed, half-hipped, I'd hoped, but on the bad nights he struggles to get up on those back legs like he's heaving ballast off a sinking ship. The husky part of him just seems to make him shed and yell, especially when I'm late getting home. I'd hoped for a little more time from the mix, maybe. But maybe not.

He's finally gotten used to fireworks. Thunder's mostly all right now, unless it's very bad. The washing machine is a new terror; sometimes I forget until it goes into the spin cycle and he lifts my legs off the ground trying to crawl under me. He eats books when he's anxious, when I've committed the temerarious crime of coming home and leaving again in the same day. Cold Mountain is nothing more than shredded cardboard and a few strung-together chapters, a sacrificial lamb to preserve Catherine, Called Birdy and Holes. The Private Patient died years ago.

He didn't want to come indoors tonight. The dryer was going, almost as bad as the washing machine, and there were stairs between him and bed. He let me coax him in at last, because I can't lift him and can't push him, and he made it clear that when he stiff-leg trotted inside he did so because he loved me, not because he wanted to. I sat with him while he found an acceptable patch of rug in the front room; I cooed and petted him and gave him a treat he didn't earn. He still whined when I left and looked like he wanted to get up, but didn't think he could make it.

He's getting old; it's his turn. His muzzle is turning white and his eyes have gone cloudy with cataracts. 2+ nuclear sclerosis, maybe -- probably all a little blurry, that's all. No PSCs, no cortical spoking; central vision's honestly probably fine. The vet keeps saying dogs adapt well. He can certainly see the stray cat who keeps lurking on my front porch. I'd like them to be friends, but a week ago he got out and chased her off like a bullet from a gun. His hips were good that day, and adrenaline covers a multitude of sins.

I have a picture of the first time we took him to get a Christmas tree. He's sitting and looking up and his head isn't even high to my knee. I remember watching him tear around the dog park lap after lap after lap, the single mixed greyhound out of fifteen or twenty dogs the only one who could keep up with him. I have pictures of him at the end of nearly every lecture I give; lately I've been tripping over them like rocks, stony little griefs worked loose from a streambed when the water moves too fast.

I'm thirty-five years old. I keep thinking that every dog who was alive on the planet when I was born is dead. Most are long dead. My dog has meds to help, which is comforting. I have a vet who will help me put him to sleep in my home, his home, when the time comes. Two to four years, she guesses, maybe, if he doesn't get cancer. When I watch him struggle to stand up I wonder if that's not too long for kindness.

It's a very human thing to miss someone before they die. Dogs don't do that. They live in an endless now, like a kid in a yellow summer. Now, I love you. Now, it hurts -- now it stops. Now, I love you.

I want that for us for what's left, for whatever one two three four years we have. When it happens, I want him to die in no pain, looking at me holding him where all his toys are, his favorite rope, his purple pig, his leash, his tennis balls. I want him thinking nothing but Now, I'm tired; now, I'm happy.

The empty place at the foot of the bed hurts tonight. The grief stings and bites, worse because I know I'm borrowing it ahead of time, because he's asleep fifteen feet below me, warm and full, even if tonight's a bad night and the stairs are too hard. I have to sit in it, though, just for a few minutes. Try it on for size. It's his turn, I keep thinking, and mine. Everyone who has ever loved a dog has done this before me. Now, I love you. Now, I miss you. Now, it hurts.

[earlgreytea68]

I have always made fun of the people on House Hunters who are like, "I MUST HAVE A BRAND NEW HOUSE. NON-NEGOTIABLE. NO ONE CAN HAVE LIVED IN IT BEFORE." That always seemed so ridiculous to me. Like, who cares??? That is so wasteful and inefficient to think that a house can only be lived in by one family!!! Obviously we have to reuse houses and can't keep building new ones!!!! That is such an American thing to think!!!!

But it's true that the last house I owned was brand new. That's just how it worked out in the town/area of the country I lived in. This house I currently own is older. And in the couple of years I've lived here I have:

Fixed the air conditioning system when it broke.

Fixed the garbage disposal when it broke.

Fixed the kitchen sink when it broke.

Replaced the boiler when it broke.

Replaced the washer and dryer unit when it broke.

Replaced the bathtub when it broke.

Fixed the garage door when it broke.

Just now I came home to realize that the thermostat is broken (not the brand new boiler, because I still have hot water). So now tomorrow I have to replace that. And for the first time...I get it hahahahah. I get why people want a brand new home. It WAS nice to move into a house and everything was brand new and worked and nothing was going to have to be replaced for a little while. I have now bought a house AND bought everything that goes into the house, and it's not like I got a discount on the house to make up for that lol. (Oh, and my house was inspected and passed. None of these issues showed up on inspection. It's just that everything was old and apparently near the end of its natural lifespan.)

Anyway, I still obviously don't think you need to buy a brand new house and that houses should only be used once. But I do see now why I'm sure people might try to buy a house that says they just recently replaced the boiler or the appliances. Very smart! I should have thought about that! And obviously eventually I will have replaced everything and maybe I'll have a year or so where everything works before I have to start replacing again, because such is the way of a house. But I am very much missing my brand new house and all the things that worked in it lol. I didn't realize how awesome it was that the heat always came on when it asked me to.

(And I recognize my privilege in having a house at all, including a house with heat. I'm just whining for a second. I'll get over it. I am very lucky to have shelter and be able to afford to fix these things when they break so I can continue to have heat.)

[tragicromanceisland]

What Happens in Wonderland, Remains

Character x female reader

Chapter Four

“Uncle Leona!!”

Leona grumbled under his breath; this was – what seemed to be the 27th time – in one day that his nephew sought him out.

“Uncle Leona, wait!!” Cheka called out.

Leona halted abruptly as his kid nephew ran into him.

“What is it this time, kid? I’m busy.” He retorted.

Cheka huffed out as he straightened himself and stood in front of his uncle. He wasn’t near as tall as his uncle yet, but he was gaining some height! Leona narrowed his eyes.

“What’s the matter you’re dad ain’t got time for ya or something?”

“Who is this?” Cheka asked as he showed Leona a picture of you hanging over a smug looking Leona.

Leona’s eyes widened as he placed a gloved hand to his forehead. His heart was racing at a mere image of you. His tail flicked as he grabbed the photo out of Cheka’s hand.

“Where’d ya get this?” He snarled.

Cheka furrowed his brows. “Answer my question first! Then I’ll tell you.”

Leona huffed irritated; he wasn’t in the mood to play games.

“Whatever, it’s none of your business.” He stormed off.

Cheka frowned. He just wanted to know because he had seen his uncle look at that same photo for years. He always seemed so sad when he looked at it. He figured the lady in the picture must have been someone important. He just wanted his uncle to be happy. Little did Cheka know that his father Farena had seen the whole thing.

Farena sighed as his eyes fell to the floor. If there was one thing, he hated more than Leona being so hard on himself it was seeing his brother unhappy without the one person he cared about most by his side. He knew he was lucky; he had his wife and his son. His life was good, though it wasn’t without its struggles. Farena had tried for years now to try and get Leona to date other people at least see if he could find someone he could be compatible with. Yet it always came back to her, and Leona always left, not wanting to waste his energy arguing about the subject.

Leona shouldn’t have visited today; it was the same thing every time. His car was shut off in the garage of his house. He stared at the photo his nephew found. His thumb brushed over your image. He bumped his head back against the headrest of his seat and closed his eyes.

Would you be proud of me? Or would you be disappointed in me like my family? I can’t help but wonder about the kind of life we could have if you return and accept my proposal. Or maybe… you’ve moved on. It’s been five years. Not a day has gone by that I haven’t thought of you and wondered how you’re doing.

…(y/n).

I still love you, so when will you return to me? When are you going to show up and apologize for keepin’ me waitin’ for so damn long?

He blinked open his emerald eyes and sighed. He was too tired for anything else today. He needed a nap. He exited his car and walked into the house through the garage. His house was messy, but thankfully, he had Ruggie to help him keep it clean every other day he would come over to check on him. He was annoying, but at least he helped him. Jack occasionally showed up, too. He wondered if they were worried about him. He brushed it off. The only thing that mattered was being able to see you again. He was going to make it happen eventually.

 He pulled off his clothes and tossed them on the floor wherever. His bedroom floor is littered with clothing. He walked into his bathroom and filled up the bathtub. Sinking into the comfortably warm water, he exhaled. His mind wandered to one of his favorite memories he had with you.

“Are you sure?”

“If I wasn’t I wouldn’t be standin’ here telling ya it was okay.” He retorted as he began to remove his clothing.

Leona was the first one you told your secret to. He knew you were a woman, and this was the first time you were exposing this to him. He had only found out by the unfortunate timing of your menstrual cycle. You happened to be sitting beside him, and you could see his nose scrunching up. Then he turned over to you and began sniffing close to your side until he immediately withdrew from you. His ears flattened against his head as his tail began to flick. You were mortified. Leona kept his distance for a day after that, and then he confronted you with a smug smile in the hallway, saying he knew you weren’t really a male.

You slowly stripped down, embarrassed. Leona was using all his willpower to not watch as you undressed to your undergarments. He stripped first and emerged into the water. A few seconds later, you joined him in the pool, and Leona faced you.

“Since it’s just the two of us… how about we have some fun?”

The smug look on his face made your cheeks warm. “You mean…?”

“If I kissed you, would you be okay with it?”

It had been a while since you dated someone. Your relationship in high school ended with your boyfriend cheating on you. So you had remained single for a while, and now that you were at Night Raven College, maybe you could have a loyal boyfriend. Leona was only a foot away from you, his heart pounding.

“I’m…okay with it.”

Leona didn’t waste time closing the distance. Ever since he found out, he had been replaying a first kiss with you in his mind at least twenty times or more a day, and now, finally, he had a good opportunity to do so.

“Are you sure?”

He didn’t want to feel like he was pressuring you into it.

You nodded. “I would like to kiss you too.”

He arched a brow. He was pleasantly surprised you felt the same. He reached out water dripping from his hand and arm as he placed his palm on the side of your neck as his eyes fell to your lips. You leaned in closer and closed your eyes. His lips pressed against yours as his eyes closed. When he pulled away just enough to study your reaction. Your eyes fluttered open, and you met his darkened, lustful gaze. You felt a pull as you pressed your lips back against his. Your arms wrapped around his neck as he pushed you up against the side of the pool. His canines poked into your lower lip as your lips continued to touch repeatedly.

Leona snapped out of the memory and lowered his eyes to the water that filled the tub. He was miserable without you. He couldn’t even look at other women the same way. Besides, it’s not like he wanted to look at other women anyway. He sighed his brother, and his wife would only keep nagging at him about finding someone else. He was tired of hearing it. Maybe he would try finding someone else…maybe.

[phanfictioncatalogue]

Flirting (3) Masterlist

part one, part two

A Right Wrong Number (ao3) - husbants

Summary: Dan texts the wrong number after going on a date. Lucky for him, the wrong number is a kind man named Phil. And then they keep texting.

Arthropods and Awkwardness (ao3) - phantasticworks

Summary: Dan Howell is terrified of spiders. So when he finds one in his bathtub, the only thing he can do is go to his very cute neighbor and hope that he will help him get rid of it. Cute banter ensues.

blanket of stars (ao3) - silentdescant

Summary: “That’s all for now, thank you.”

“I’ll be back to check on you in a bit.”

The whole script is so routine, Phil thinks his brain would short-circuit if either of them deviated from it. Dan walks away and Phil sinks lower in his seat, sighing into his blue drink.

“When are you gonna ask him out, man?” Martyn asks.

break and run (ao3) - jestbee

Summary: Phil teaches a cute boy to play pool

Chills (ao3) - huphilpuffs

Summary: Dan and Phil meet at a polar bear plunge.

Dreams Tonight (ao3) - det395

Summary: “Think about how good it will be if we wait,” he whispers.

drunk words are sober thoughts (ao3) - bombshellphil

Summary: The opportunity of a life time comes in the form of Phil Lester actually showing up at a party, all tattoos and bright blue eyes. Dan's been crushing on him for far too long, so getting the chance to play Never Have I Ever with his crush? Yeah, he can't pass that one up. What could go wrong?

fade to black (ao3) - sierraadeux

Summary: That’s the thing about Phil. He’s a tease.

or

films, flirting, and other things that start with f.

falling for you (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: dan's clumsy and gay

favorite day (ao3) - calvinahobbes

Summary: His fingers hover over the keys. It feels as if Phil has been brave on his side of the screen. Maybe Dan can be just a little brave in return.

Early days flirting in chat.

Fire On Ice (ao3) - Spring_Haze

Summary: Dan Howell, a professional ice hockey player, fancies the new guy, Phil Lester. The two meet unceremoniously in the physical therapy room, and Dan learns that his feelings are reciprocated. The men are not shy about their growing attraction and enjoy each other in a steamy, semi-public, and unexpected sexual adventure.

Frottica (ao3) - Spring_Haze

Summary: Dan finally acts on his feelings toward the sexy barista at Lester's Coffee Shop. Phil is relieved by the man's boldness, and an exciting new relationship begins.

gay fairies (ao3) - moonythejedi395

Summary: Everyone knew of Phil Lester's deep hatred for Dan Howell. Everyone knew that Dan Howell was the gayest gay man to ever gay. Everyone assumed that Phil hated Dan because Dan would not stop hitting on Phil, and everyone agreed that even they would be irritated by that much flirting, however everyone did not know or even guess that Phil Lester really hated Dan Howell so much because Phil actually wanted to make out with him.

Hello My Name Is Phol Rester (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: Dan, the new worker at Phil’s favorite coffee shop makes a habit of misspelling his name on his cup everyday however, his persistence is rather amusing and impressive to him. Will Phil start to fall for the classics loving, name misspelling, brown-haired boy?

Honey, You're Rubbing Me Up The Wrong Way. (ao3) - AnotherPhanficWriter

Summary: Phil decides to walk from one end of the country to the other, completely naked.

He gets as far as Scotland before one particular officer keeps stopping him.

(That officer has curly brown hair, brown eyes and the cutest dimples).

I Always Liked the Coffee You Made (ao3) - smallbump

Summary: 17-year old Dan gets a summer job at Starbucks and the regular customer Phil makes him weak in the knees and of course he spends his entire summer flirting with him constantly.

In the Light of the Moon (ao3) - rainbowchristy

Summary: Dan Howell’s never had any friends. Why? Because he has a superpower. One that he can’t control. Luckily, the new kid at his school doesn’t mind.

Love Scenario (ao3) - worriedpeach (skeletonflowers)

Summary: When Phil first saw him in the spring, he thought he looked like bubblegum.

Lydian (ao3) - sierraadeux

Summary: When Phil needs to accurately depict a jazz club in one of his films, it only makes sense to experience one in real life.

New Begginings (ao3) - Nefertiti1052 (Succubusphan)

Summary: An uptight paleontologist gets the invitation of a lifetime, the rockstar invites himself; an involuntary and horrifying adventure follows.

Hello My Name is Phol Rester (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: Dan, the new worker at Phil’s favorite coffee shop makes a habit of misspelling his name on his cup everyday however, his persistence is rather amusing and impressive to him. Will Phil start to fall for the classics loving, name misspelling, brown-haired boy?

possibly, maybe i'm falling (ao3) - lestered (clonetrobed)

Summary: It’s just another boring day at Dan’s summer internship. Luckily, there’s an accidental coffee date waiting for him at the customer service desk.

Prestissimo (ao3) - worriedpeach (skeletonflowers)

Summary: When Dan starts to get notes in his locker in the form of terrible pick up lines, he doesn't know who it could be and he doesn't really care. All he cares about is his violin and his studies. He could care less about the nonchalant cellist who never seems to take anything seriously.

Speaking Truthfully (ao3) - Junebug1312

Summary: The universe decided it was time for Phil to start telling the truth. No matter if he wanted to or not.

Sliding To You (ao3) - Evening42

Summary: Dan takes his best friend’s son Jordan to a water slide park for the day. He meets the cute park manager, who is initially flirting with him but then suddenly cool. Dan wants to know why, as he’d very much like to keep flirting with him.

spilled intentions (ao3) - ordanary

Summary: It’s Dans first day of uni and everything is going decently until a black haired boy in his year spills coffee all over his jumper– and then it’s suddenly going wonderfully.

Steal My Heart (ao3) - SimplyUndead

Summary: Dan hates his job, in which he works at a bank, but one day, a flirtatious man comes in who just so happens to be a burgarler. He steals £10,000 and maybe Dan's heart.

The Wrong Door But The Right Place (ao3) - CanDanAndPhilNot (enbycalhoun)

Summary: Phil finds himself in the last place he thought he'd be: working in a bar. It's not quite as bad as he thought it would be, especially when he gets a new regular named Dan.

Three Tattoos (ao3) - greensweater

Summary: When a talkative, blue-eyed boy named Phil Lester walks into Dan Howell's tattoo parlor one dusky autumn afternoon, Dan isn't sure what to make of him. But when Phil keeps coming back, their one-time connection grows into friendship, and eventually, something more.

to coffee or not to coffee (ao3) - danhoweiis

Summary: dan doesn't like coffee, phil works in a coffee shop. cue some awful attempts at flirting and some first dates

Truth or Truth (ao3) - developerdaniel

Summary: aka the fic were dan and phil come home from a night out to drink even more alcohol and play an edited game of truth or dare and end up confessing their feelings for each other which lead to them finally giving in to how much they've wanted each other for so long.

Tumblr Into His Arms (ao3) - nebulous_frog

Summary: Dan is a swing dancing instructor that teaches a confused and clumsy Phil how to dance. Cue tripping and falling, flirting, and some teasing from some friends.

up for the new buzz (ao3) - jestbee

Summary: Dan remembers getting his ears pierced and how he'd felt so adult at the time, like he'd done something revolutionary and rebellious. But it hadn't been in a place like this, it had been tame in comparison to the type of world he's just walked into with no idea if he's out of his depth.

Valley (ao3) - Misha_with_wings

Summary: Dan and Phil definitely weren’t outdoorsy people, but the one time they decide to go hiking their lives change forever.

Or- they go hiking and find an abandoned dog and Phil begs Dan to keep it.

[mistressmanumit]

MOVE IT A LITTLE FURTHER DOWN THE ROAD:

Well that was unexpected. While I finally took time for myself as advised by my licensed Mental Health Professional, my partner decided to attempt and usurp my healing just the same as his. It was about a full year into our relationship that it hit me like a ton of bricks. I locked myself in the bathroom, hiding in the bathtub as had become customary. I stood in front of the sink trying to not cry too loudly. Trying to be as quiet as possible because if he heard me, then it was pointed out how selfish my pain was. How inconvenient for the grandstanding theatrical melodrama he wanted to hone. It was then, that night that I realized that I was living with a truly Narcissistic individual. A term I do not use lightly. He was at this point all about blame shifting...and the other snakes of his Medusa wig had yet to make their way to the light from the darkness which had become his excuse for 'love'. Where did it all start? On a dating ap. With a lie. He claimed to have been divorced and looking for a best friend. Someone to go on adventures with (you know the type-que the 4runner laden with snorkel (that will never see a creek bed let alone water and mudcrawl) and hipster Selleck throwback 'stache (tolja YUGE Smoky and The Bandit Fan) and puns set to 'full auto'. The type of guy a woman who might convince herself she had most of her shit together, would fall for. Enter stage left: love bombing. It was the very 1st date, and now looking back I can say without a doubt I was being Love Bombed from the jump. I mean the man showed up to the pool at my apartment complex with fancy tacos and a 6 pack of Pacifico. At that particular juncture in dating I'd nearly given up on finding a good match. So I got lazy. I made it completely on the Joe to show up and accommodate my outlandish request (bring me tacos and beer. At my apartment complex pool or don't. And I'll just keep swipping) lo and behold this good looking dude shows up. Tacos and cooler in tow. He was gorgeous and kind. Punny. And told me, like I said, that he was divorced. A father to some amazing crotch gobblins but his ex sounded like a total monster. I know now, that if someone decides to bad mouth their ex out of the gate, that it says more about them than it ever does about the aforementioned lover. That night I told him that I had a toxic ex or two but didn't digress as that was their story to tell. That right there told him I didn't have healthy boundaries. That I likely was more empathetic and prone to try and fix people. That right there was a green flag to him that I would be easy to manipulate. I wish I had some green flags along the way. Shortly after one date we had our 5th, then our 1 month and 2 month anniversary. It was then that I discovered he lied about being divorced. I had found paperwork in his hotel room (he was traveling longterm for work) that was nothing more than an Agreed Entry for terms of a Legal Separation signed by the woman I'd heard him drag by her first name time and again. How she was so demanding. How she was a stick in the mud. How she was a prude. (Language which I allowed to blur my boundaries because I certainly didn't want to be a stick in the mud too) the discovery of this paperwork made me breakdown for the first time. It was then that I realized he could lie effortlessly and directly to my face. It was then that I began to question his motive and what he would tell me.

Why? Because not a few years prior did nearly the exact same thing happen. I met a guy online and he swore he was single with custody of his daughters. Little did I know that both accounts were boldface lies. I felt sorry for his inability to house himself so I lent him my couch. Then it became clear that not only did he not have custody of his daughters, he only had a somewhat consistent relationship with one of them, and that his visitation was very seriously threatened if he couldn't find a place to rent. There I go again...trying to fix a man. It was about a week later that his very much current wife showed up to tell me how scorched Earth she intended on going to prove a point. To this day, the woman stalks my social media and invested money to create a very unflattering website about me. Yep ..a website.

So when I realized that my modern day Selleck had lied about such a huge thing as well, I started to have cold sweats. I started to have horrible indigestion. And just about then my life really started to go off the rails because this dreamboat of a guy's soon-to-be ex figured out my identity and reached out through social media to the very married wife of my professional couch surfer from a few years prior. I should've closed the chapter and written off the losses then. At that point I was left with egg on my face and embarrassment in my gut. Over the next three years Love Bombing would beget Blame Shifting and Future Faking, which would beget Gaslighting and dispatching flying monkeys..and inevitably not only did I end up emotionally wrecked, but I was carrying around a permanent knot in my left shoulder, G.I. issues (multiple Endoscopic Hemeclips placed to curtail bloody ulcers and a daily dose of a PPI and Bentyl..... after my Gastro Doc informed me I had Chrons and IBS. Literally haven't eaten my beloved tacos from Puesto since 2020. To top it off I was diagnosed with an Autoimmune disorder AND had to start taking Xanax for the first time in my adult life. That's right....being trafficked as a child for my mother's drug habit and our rent wasn't enough to ever warrant anxiety meds, nor was being in an emotionally, physically and sexually abusive relationship with the father of my children, or the loss of a small tribe of heroes to their own demons and/or The Global War on Terror. Nope none of that was enough to tip the scales towards the 'ole Xanny-fairy. Just love was. Or at least what he was telling me and my Central Nervous System was "love". The downward spiral really started to hit the fan in the winter of 2021 and by Feb of 2022 he had made his eighth and nearly final unaliving attempt. He was hospitalized in ICU on a vent....the whole nine all because I finally had enough and asked for a divorce. A response that most individuals would cry through, maybe laugh through tears over a bottle of red or a few beers with their buddies ....but his response was his eighth attempt in 18 months. And after multiple inpatient stays and copious amounts of painstaking walking on proverbial eggshells it all came to a head.

And that brings us here...to the very long winded apology at my lack of effort into this book. Don't worry, there was PLENTY more that happened while I stepped away from the keyboard. I learned to love myself again. I discovered a few new passions in life, and what I needed most for clarity: no contact. I'll be back to fill in the gaps .....but for now I need sleep and to take those little PEZ shaped candies my newly befriended Xany Fairy left on my pillow with this evening's turndown service. You'll have to excuse me, just typing this to get the words out, while supposedly cathartic...is also quite triggering. I'll get the story out. One day at a time. Until then, have a nice evening and remember this hard truth: "Some people will never ask for your side of the story because the side that they heard fits the description of how they want to feel about you." -Dr.Caroline Leaf

[harryhoney-bee]

I'm feeling really soft and fuzzy today, So if I can request something I want to do that abeja 🐝💓

#Concept: Nightly routine with y/n and Harry- parents of two little babies.

Tag me if you write this baby ✨✨

Adore you alot 💕

Night Routine

Warning: your ovaries might explode... mine did 🤚🏻 I would give this man 9 children if he asked.

Word count: 1.7k

I have a kofi, so please consider buying me coffee if you can <3

I hope you enjoy it!! Let me know what you think 😚

“But I want to take a beth with him, daddy,” Cecília whined to Harry, while he undressed her, putting her new pajamas and towel on the bathroom counter.

“My little darling, he is still little, he can’t take bath with you,” Harry explained, taking Cecí on his lap and putting her inside the warm tub, handing her some of her favorite toys. “Lorenzo is just 6 months, he’s not as big as you.”

Harry made a bowl with his hands, wetting her curly hair and applying shampoo, a pout still on her face. “Please, daddy?” she said, her chubby hand grabbing his arm. Cecí had already mastered her puppy eyes technique, and she knew how much her dad had a weak spot for her.

“Alright, alright,” He finally gave in, “but he will stay outside of the tub, he doesn’t know how to sit by himself.”

“Thank you, daddy!” The girl splashed water around in excitement, which made Harry smile. That’s how he always wanted to see her: happy and healthy.

Harry went to the door, keeping an eye on the girl in the tub. “Baby? Are you done nursing? Cecí wants to see Lorenzo,” he tried to call his wife as loud as he could while being mindful of Lorenzo, who could be asleep by now. He never wanted to alarm any of him or Cecília with his loud voice.

In a matter of seconds, Y/n appeared in the hallway, a confused expression on her face while Lorenzo was calmly laying down on her arms, his little hands resting on Y/n’s shoulders. “What’s wrong? Why does she want to see him? We just had diner together,” she asked, heading in Harry’s direction.

“I’m not sure, guess she just missed him,” Harry answered, giving his wife a kiss on the forehead and bending down to talk to a very awake Lorenzo. “But who wouldn’t miss you, huh? Such a cutie, right buddy?” he was aware that using a baby voice wasn’t the best, but he couldn’t help, Lorenzo was just extremely adorable.

“Mommy! Enzo!” Cecília called, from the opposite side of the bathroom, “come here mommy, miss you too.”

Y/n sat on the bathroom floor, Lorenzo still with her. “Hey, my heart, having a good bath with daddy?” she asked at the same time Harry sat down by her side and hugged her from the side, laying his chin on her head.

“Yeah! Daddy always let me play,” Cecília took one of the yellow ducks and showed her mom, “This is Mc Duck.”

“Wow, he’s a very beautiful duck isn’t he?” She asked, giving Lorenzo to Harry while kneeling near the bathtub since Cecí still had to wash her hair, Y/n gently took the excess of shampoo from the girl’s hair, while Harry tried to keep Lorenzo entertained by singing him a silly song.

“He is, I love yellow,” the little girl admitted, “I think Lorenzo loves yellows too.”

“And why do you think that, Cecí?” Harry asked amused while pretending to eat the boy’s fingers.

“Because we’re are best friends,” She said as if the answer was obvious, “and friends like the same things.” Y/n and Harry looked at each other and laughed, for a five-year-old girl she knew a lot about relationships.

“Oh, how do you know that?” Y/n asked, finishing washing her hair, letting Cecília enjoy her time in the bath.

“Because you and daddy are best friends, you wear the same clothes sometimes, listen to the same music, and watch the same movies,” with every new topic she would count down on her fingers, it was quite a comical sight.

Harry’s chuckle filled the room, the baby on his lap giggled too. “Well, my little lady, you are right. But friends can also like different things, too,” he told her. “Me and mommy like a lot of similar things, but we also have our preferences.”

“Exactly, daddy loves bananas, but I don’t” y/n complemented, getting Cecília out of the tub, helping her into some warm clothes, “I don’t like to work out, but your dad always wakes up early to go for a run, see? We like different things but we still love each other.”

Harry got up from the floor, rocking Lorenzo softly, his heavy eyes indicating how sleepy the baby was. He took the combing cream in his hand and began combing Cecília’s curls with one hand, while his other arm held Lorenzo. Being a father of two made him very talented at doing two things at the same time. While he did that, Y/n was getting Cecí’s toothpaste ready.

“Daddy, do you love mommy even if she doesn’t go running with you?” Cecí asked, before opening her mouth so Y/n could brush her teeth. Normally they would let Cecília do it by herself, with their supervision, but it was already late and the couple desperately needed to get the children to bed, or else their routine would be messed up. Good thing Lorenzo seemed to be falling asleep already.

“Of course I do! We don’t love people just because they do the same things we do, we love people because they are kind and respectful to us, yeah?” Harry said, looking at Y/n and blowing her a kiss. This is what he loved the most about parenthood: watching the kids growing into their best version.

Parenting was made in many different ways, but the couple especially loved having these kinds of conversations. Even though Cecília was still young, she was already beginning to comprehend what love and friendships were, and Harry and Y/n had the privilege to teach her that.

Harry finished her hair, putting the brush and the products in their place under the sink while Y/n put on some socks on Cecí’s feet, the little girl was yawning, seeming tired. Lorenzo started to fussy on Harry’s arms.

“Guess it’s time to sleep, huh?” Harry said, caressing Cecílias head, “Tired, my baby? Want daddy to read a bedtime story to you? Or do you want mommy?” At the same time he mentioned Y/n, Lorenzo started to soft cry. “Hey, what’s wrong?” Harry asked, looking down at the upset’s baby face.”

Y/n took his from Harry’s arms, cuddling him closer to her chest, “What do you want, Enzo? Mommy just fed you” she looked at her husband, “I’ll nurse him again on the bed, he’s probably just a bit agitated, will you put her to sleep?”

“Yeah, of course.”

The woman kissed Cecília on the forehead, “have a good night, ok, baby? Mommy will take you to the playground tomorrow, alright?”

“Ok mommy, I love you and little bro too,” she said, giving a hug to her mom before she disappeared through the door with the crying baby.

Harry took Cecília by her small hand, leading them to her room, just by the side of the main suite, where the couple slept. He guided the little girl to her bed, giving her all of her favorite stuffed animals, and covered Cecília in her Lilac duvet.

“What story do you want today?

“The pirate one, please,” she asked, laying her head on the pillow as Harry went to her bookshelf, picking the one with the title Pirate’s cove. He sat by the end of the bed and began telling the story.

“I have a story for you, a story of untold riches and a young lad who found them. And who am I, you ask? Well, I am the spirit of the sand-dollar, a pirate and a buccaneer, Captain of the seahorse, the finest ship to ever sail the seven seas…”

Harry would occasionally stop to answer any questions Cecília had, but after 15 minutes he was done with the book and the girl was fast asleep, hugging tight to her little lamb. He made sure she was tucked in and turned off the lights (besides the one on the side of Cecília’s bed, she was scared to sleep in a pitch-black room), he closed the door and headed to his bedroom.

To Harry’s surprise, Lorenzo was sleeping in his bassinet by the side of the mattress. He usually would sleep in his nursery, but today just seemed like an off day to the little boy. Harry got closer to him, stroking the chubby cheeks, “Oh my little bug, did mommy let you sleep here with us? You’re not feeling fine?”

“I think he’s teething,” Y/n said in a raspy voice, taking her head from the pillow, “he’s even a bit warmer than usual, I think his gums are itching.”

“My poor baby,” Harry mumbled, turning his head to Y/n, “I hate seeing him upset, maybe we could make some homemade Popsicle, it helped when Cecília was teething.”

“Yeah, we can try that, we can make them tomorrow.” she patted the mattress, “now please come to bed, he did a number on me, I’m so tired.”

“Alright baby,” Harry took off his shirt, standing only in sweatpants, he went to the bed, laying by Y/n side, one arm hooked on her waist as she cuddled to him, placing her head on his shoulder.

“I’m so lucky to have you,” Y/n said against his neck.

“Oh baby, I am the lu--”

“--I mean, how many husbands would still love their wives even if they wouldn’t go jogging at 6 in the morning?” she said teasingly, her giggles reaching his ear.

He rolled his eyes playfully, “you are making a lot of jokes for someone who is tired,” he kissed her temple. “I’m gonna wake you up at 5 am tomorrow, so we can be fitness together.”

“Don’t you dare! You do that and your plan of being a father to three it’s over.”

“Damn sweetheart, that’s not very nice, huh?”

“You’re the one who started,” she said, before closing her eyes, snuggling to Harry’s body. The man placed a hand on her belly, falling asleep minutes later.

Tag list: @sunandherflores @elenagilbert01 @bellelittleoff, @cheshire-salvatore-mikaelson

If you don't want to be in the tag list just let me know, please!! <3

[dreamescapeswriting]

Night Feeds ~ KSJ [Request]

WORD COUNT:2.2K

PAIRING: Seokjin X Fem!Reader

GENRE: established relationship, family au, angst with a happy ending, fluffy, arguing

a/n: I noticed that I tend to leave my imagines with a bit of an open ending so I’m doing my best to improve on that and make everything tie together. I hope that you enjoy this hunny

"You have no idea Jin! I'm tired, I fell asleep for two minutes!" You cried out as Jin stood in the bathroom staring at you and then down to the bathtub. The water was discoloured from all of the scrubbing he had been doing on your daughter's arm. Bath scourer on the side of the tub along with body scrub, whitening toothpaste and all of the coconut oil you had available. All your daughter had said was that she wanted to be like Uncle Jungkook and then she had "tattoos" all over her arms. Small doodles that she would normally do on paper but on her arms, trying to match with Jungkook who had told her that she could do it when she was old enough. It wasn't as if you could watch her every second of every day, you had a newborn baby in one room, your head was all over the place trying to care for your son and daughter alone. You were exhausted from the night feeds and it wasn't as though Jin was exactly offering to help you with those either. Instead, he would fall back to sleep or go and sleep on the sofa while you were up with your newborn son. It had been that way when you had your first daughter too. You had no idea why you had expected anything different this time around. 

Marriage and family were supposed to be about working together, making sure that each of you was supported but right now. All it felt like was that you were supporting Jin and were left hanging on your own. 

"Do you realize how much worse this could have been? She could have burnt the house down! She could have run away," Jin was yelling at you but never looking up at you. That was the kind of person Jin was, he could yell all he wanted but he knew the moment he would look at you he would stop. Not wanting to see you upset but this was something serious, something he wasn't just going to let slide. 

"But it wasn't, I'm sorry Jin." You whispered as you reached out to touch his shoulder but he nudged you away softly. Reaching for the plug so that he could empty the water out from the tub and begin cleaning up. You didn't want this to be the way you fought, you hardly had fights with one another because you hated them so much.

"It's too late for that Y/n, what if she had seriously hurt herself? What were you thinking?" He questioned sounding a little harsh as he finally turned to look at you. His face was red as he looked at you, your heart sink as you stared back up at him. The guilt was already weighing down on you and now you had Jin looking at you as if you were the worst mother in the entire world. 

"We have a nanny for a reason," He mumbled coming out of the bathroom and heading toward the staircase, frowning you looked at the time. It was almost 11 at night, where could he possibly be going right now? 

"Where are you going?" Your voice cracked as you saw him reaching for his car keys and jacket, while you stared at him. 

"Jin!" You yelled as he opened the door and slammed it behind him as he walked out on you. Not wanting to deal with any of this right now but you weren't going to let him walk out. Not when you were still having a conversation, you weren't going to let him have the easy way out this time. 

"Fuck, sake!" You yelled out in frustration, walking down the stairs when you stepped onto one of the toys belonging to your daughter. It was over as quickly as soon as it happened. As if you had blinked and suddenly ended up on the floor, your ankle throbbing and your head spinning. 

"Mama?" You heard your daughter question as she began to walk around the top floor to see why you were screaming. She'd woken up hearing you and Jin fighting and stayed in her room, she hated the yelling just as much as you did.

"Hey sweetie," You croaked out attempting to get up but your ankle throbbed and sent a jolt of pain through the rest of your leg the second you put weight on it. You hissed looking around for your phone and then back to your daughter, 

"B-Bab, can you get mummy's phone?" You questioned as you pointed into the living room, your little girl rushing down the staircase to get your phone for you. 

"Do you know where your brother is? Go and make sure he's still sleeping for me baby," You ushered her back up the stairs to go and make sure he hadn't woken up through all of this while you called the Nanny. You wanted her to come and watch the kids while you went to the hospital, not telling Jin anything since he was the one to walk out on all of this. 

Sure it was petty but you didn't care, you wanted your kids to be looked after while you went to the hospital. What Jin didn't know wasn't going to kill him.

Jin walked through the door the next morning expecting to find you curled up with the kids but he frowned. The kitchen smelt like fresh pancakes and he could hear your daughter giggling. He'd come home to make sure she got to school on time, he wanted to take her with you. 

"Babe? You're making breakfast?" He called out walking around the corner to see the nanny standing in the kitchen, your daughter eating at the table while your son slept in a bassinet in the room.

"Where's Y/n?" He questioned defensively, seeing the nanny look a little worried. She was under strict instructions from you not to tell Jin where you were. The doctors had asked you to stay in overnight since you'd hit your head a little hard, they just wanted to make sure there was nothing else wrong before they sent you home. 

"She had to go somewhere, I'm watching the kids." She lied, it was an obvious lie so Jin stared at your daughter as she looked up at him. The marks were completely gone from her arms now and she was already up and dressed for school. 

"Mummy fell down, she's not here." Panic rose inside of Jin hearing that you had fallen and weren't there anymore. What did that mean?

"Where is mummy baby?" He questioned, sitting down beside her as the nanny said nothing. She was under instructions not to say anything but it didn't mean that your daughter couldn't tell Jin where you were.

"Hospital, Nanny Nora is going to take us later...Mummy said we should keep it a secret," Nora smiled weakly at Jin and he sighed rolling his head back and rubbing his temples. 

"She told me not to tell you, but she's in the women and children's section, they kept her overnight because of her head." Why wouldn't you want Jin to know? The two of you were married and were supposed to tell each other everything and yet, you hid this? 

"Jin? I told Nora-" You'd tried to speak but Jin shook his head, cutting you off. The moment he'd taken your daughter to school he went home and got ready to come and visit you. Even if you didn't want him there he was going to show up.

"She didn't, our daughter did," Jin said as he pushed the pram over to your bed, your son sleeping soundly in the little pram as you smiled down at him. Reaching your hand down to rub his little cheek with your thumb, he looked so much like Jin, even as a small baby. It was as if looking down a miniature version of your husband.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He sounded hurt but you didn't want to give into that. The whole night you had spent inside you had done nothing but think about your relationship with Jin and the kids. You wanted him to start pulling more weight around with them, taking them out to parks, helping you with the night feeds. It wasn't as if you were the only one that could feed your son, you had pumped enough bottles to make sure there was food for him. 

"Why didn't you tell me where you were going?" You quipped back at him. Jin looked at you and sighed, he'd run back to the dorms. It was where he always went when things got too much to deal with. 

"I went to the dorms," You scoffed a little, you should have known that was where he would have been but why? Why couldn't he have stayed with you and spoken everything out one on one? 

"What was the scoff for?" Jin asked with a little anger behind his voice, staring at you as you shook your head at him. 

"That's where you always go, when night feeds are too much you go to the sofa, when we fight you go to the dorms, you run away from everything." You mumbled looking over at the nurse who was coming in to check on what you were going to be eating for lunch.

"Because night feeds are exhausting, I work all day." He explained while you shook your head at him again. There was no excuse for running away from your family or wife when you need him. 

"You don't think I find them tiring? Laying there feeding our son while his father runs away to sleep?" You snapped a little, too angry to care anymore. Why did Jin think it was acceptable for him to rush off when you had your son together.

"You're his mother, you're supposed to feed him-"

"Don't. I pump milk so we can share the responsibility, this is why I'm so tired and fall asleep around our daughter." Jin could see just how pissed off you were about all of this but he said nothing as he sat there. Your heart breaking as you thought about the words running over in your mind, 

"Do you even care? Do you even want a family anymore?" That had been the one question going through your mind when you were laid in bed all night. Wondering if all of his running away was because he didn't want this lifestyle anymore. 

"What?! No! No, I love you all." Tears built up in his eyes as he thought about you thinking that about him. How could you ever believe something like that when he loved you. Promised himself to you in front of friends and family all of those years ago. 

"Then why do you do it? Why run away? You did the same thing when we had-"

"No, I didn't! I fed her," He yelled out defensively, raising from the chair he was sitting in as you remained calm. You knew the truth, no matter what Jin seemed to believe you remembered everything. It had been you and Jin feeding your daughter most of the time, the other boys helping sometimes too.

"When? Because I seem to remember the night and day feds being me or Jimin." It was like a shock to Jin's system as he thought back on your firstborn. Your daughter who had been the light of your life's after trying for a baby for so long, the first year of her being born you had been living at the dorms. 

"I didn't...I fed her, I-" He stared down at you as you looked up at him, staying calm was how he knew you were telling the truth and he sighed. 

"I've been alone throughout both pregnancies and raising them..." You knew it was going to be hard for him to hear but he had to hear how you felt. Letting out a huge breath as he sat down and thought back on everything, 

"I didn't...I never did help..." He whispered as you sighed, rolling to the side to pick your son up and cradle him in your arms. Even when it came to changing diapers and taking them out he was always busy or rushed off to do something else. Leaving you with all of the responsibility of being a parent.

"Why didn't you say anything before now?" He questioned watching as you rocked your son in your arms, turning to look at Jin who had tears running down his cheeks. 

"What was I supposed to say?" He looked down at your son and shook his head. Never wanting to make you feel like that ever again, that you were alone in all of this. 

"I promise I'll be there more, I'll help out more." He reached across to touch your son's cheek and you smiled weakly. It wasn't just a matter of promising you something it was doing it. Making sure he was staying true to his word and wasn't just going to do it for a couple of weeks before stopping once again.

But he did it, he stuck true to his word. Helping out with both your son and daughter over the years. Making sure he was being the best father and husband that he could ever be. Improving on himself more and more as the years went by, even as you had your third and fourth child with one another. Becoming a big and happy family together.

Tagline: @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @rjsmochii @taestannie​ @sw33tnight​ @sweeneyblue1​ @agustdjoon​ @jin-from-the-block​ @acciocriativity​ @taeechwitaa​ @mwitsmejk​ @justbangtanthingz​ @stillwithlix​ @misa0000​

[k2padfoot]

Start Over

Draco x Y/n

Summary: Draco couldn’t love you in your marriage until he almost loses you.

Warnings: angst, angsty, angst. some fluff. TW: some self-harm imagery pls be careful reading!

The two of you had been married for one year now. You knew it wasn’t a marriage that he wanted, no it was more like one he was forced in to. On the other hand you, well you weren’t really surprised you had been wed to a Malfoy being a pureblooded Slytherin and all. The only thing you didn’t expect was for him to still not want you..

When Draco and yourself got married you were expecting him to be slightly reluctant at first, but you figured you’d win him with your charm over time. Unfortunately that never happened. You inevitably fell for the blonde haired beauty, but he just didn’t reciprocate those feelings even after a year. You’d fight with one another often, mostly over him not being loyal and the way he treated you. But he didn’t care, he just kept breaking your heart a little more each day. Tonight you were expecting just another drunk Draco to stumble through the door to your home.

It was around 11 o’clock now and you were sitting on the sofa with the fire crackling next to you illuminating the pages to your muggle book. You knew Draco was done with work around 7 pm and you knew he was definitely out getting wasted and falling over women that were not you like usual. Every friday night he shows up late, smelling like someone else, and his lips swollen red. He never let any other girls leave noticeable marks on him, thinking you still didn’t know what he was truly up to. Your eyes were drawn away from your book when your front door came swinging open, and an intoxicated Draco Malfoy stumbled in. You rolled your eyes at his appearance, he was noticeably wasted and you could already smell the alcohol coming off of him.

“What are you rolling your eyes about?” Draco said while slurring his words and stumbling to hang up his coat.

You slammed your book shut and rose to your feet, “Merlin Draco, do you think i’m that daft? Your such an ass!” You yelled to him as you tried to make your way past him, but he quickly grabbed your shoulder.

“Y/n, what the hell is your problem now? You are so damn needy and annoying!” he yelled back in to your face and you grimaced at the alcohol stench coming from his breath.

Your eyes were filling with tears but you didn’t want him to see how much his words really did hurt you, “Piss off! You’re drunk Draco, go to bed.” you said while you turned around and headed to the study.

You walked into your study and plopped down at the desk in the middle of the room. You just wanted to be alone right now. You could hear Draco slamming around outside of the door, but you didn’t care. You were so tired, so tired of his harsh words, his lack of decency, his disgusting actions, and just everything at this point. He had no idea just how much he hurt you everyday, and now it’s been a whole year of this and you were just so unbelievably tired.

Draco never understood why you got so upset with him. He assumed you disliked him just as much by the way you acted a lot. He figured you didn’t want to marry him either, he thought you’d never be able to love him, he knew he would break your heart so he made sure you wouldn’t fall for him. But he didn’t know how much he was breaking you already, he had no idea just how in love with him you were.

You had been reading in the study for at least an hour now trying not to consume yourself with bad thoughts. Your head was pounding, and you could feel yourself becoming more and more anxious by the minute. You quickly got up from the desk and made your way to the bathroom. You quietly tip toed past Draco’s sleeping form in your bed, you knew he’d be passed out with how much he drank so he wouldn’t come in. You had a routine for nights like this, nights where you just couldn’t handle everything.

Your bare feet came in contact with the cold tiled floor in your shared bathroom. You flipped on one of the many lights and walked over to your bathroom sink. You pulled open the cabinet under the sink and reached in for the bottle of wine you hid in there. You took it out and popped the seal while you let the large bathtub in the center of the room fill up. You never drank really and Draco knew that was because of how badly your father drank... But sometimes you just needed something to take the edge off. You slipped out of your clothing and into the warm water letting it soothe your skin. Your head was leaning against the edge of the tub and you took a deep breath before you brought the bottle to your lips and began to down some. Waiting for the pain to slowly fade away as you closed your eyes and let your body relax in the warm water.

You opened up your eyes and realized how quickly you had gotten tipsy from the wine, must’ve been because of your empty stomach. Your head was buzzing and your vision was blurred a bit, you only ever drank half a glass at most to take the edge off. But this time the large double bottle you had gotten out was half empty. This was a different type of drunk, and you didn’t like it. You didn’t like how it made your head hurt even more with bad thoughts. You didn’t like how it made your blood burn, how it made your bones numb, and your cheeks stained with hot tears. You hadn’t realized you were quietly sobbing in the tub now, eyes becoming too heavy to keep open anymore. So you let yourself slip down and become submerged in the hot water.

Draco had woken to the sound of your cries and busted into the bathroom to see you almost lifeless inside the tub. He grabbed underneath your arms and pulled you out of the water. His eyes had gazed over the almost empty bottle of wine sitting by the bathtub. His arms were wrapped around your torso as he sat the both of you down against the wall and pointed at your chest with his wand while speaking the reviving spell. Draco was now sitting behind you sobbing as he held your wet body close to his own. Your eyes shot open quickly after and you gasped loudly.

“Y/n!!! Y/n, what the hell were you doing?!! Please look at me!” Draco said as he turned your head to look into his perfect blue eyes.

You felt embarrassed but you knew you owed him an answer, “Draco, this wasn’t meant to happen. I-I just.. Sometimes I can’t handle the pain you know?” you said while stray tears slid down your cheeks.

Draco started to wrap a soft green towel around you,“Love, please tell me what’s going on?” he asked with soft eyes.

You tried to get up but you were too dizzy to stand, “Draco please don’t call me that!” you cried while hitting your fist lightly against his chest. “You don’t mean it! You don’t love me, i’m nothing to you!!” you yelled as he grabbed your arm and you fell into his chest crying.

He looked down at you with silent tears rolling down his own cheeks and softly kissed the top of your wet hair, “Y/n I- I am so fucking sorry. I never wanted to hurt you like this! Merlin I am so stupid!!!” he yelled and you flinched a bit at his tone. “Oh.. no.. no Y/n I- i’d never hurt you like that, and I never meant to hurt you like this.. I thought you’d be better off not loving me, I thought i’d hurt you if I let myself love you and I couldn’t do that.. I’ve wanted you for so long y/n but I thought it was just selfish of me. I figured if I couldn’t let myself love you i’d just live with you but I had no idea it was effecting you like this.” he said as he tilted your chin to look in his eyes again.

“Then why did you do it? Why did you let other women touch you like I should’ve been? Why did you say such harsh things to me?” you said while tears glistened your y/e/c eyes.

Draco looked down at you before answering, “I don’t know. I have no good explanation for you y/n and I know that’s not what you want to here but I just want you to know I’m sorry darling. You are worth so much more, you deserve so much more and I am so sorry I haven’t been giving you that. Your absolutely beautiful inside and out and I couldn’t apologize more for not realizing that in time. You deserve someone so much better y/n.” he said while he pushed a few stray hairs behind your ear.

You shifted in his arms to be completely facing him now, “But that’s the thing.. I don’t want anyone else, even after the things you’ve done I still don’t want someone else. Maybe we haven’t been able to truly love one another the right way but I don’t know Draco.. That doesn’t mean I just want to let you go.” you said to him as you nervously bit your bottom lip.

He reached down to cup your cheeks, “I don’t want to let you go either, honestly I never want to.. But I hurt you when I thought I was doing the complete opposite, I don’t want ever do that again. I don’t want you to feel like the things I did are ok. I want you to know just how important you are.” Draco said.

A stray tear slid down your left cheek, “I don’t want you to either... But I- I’d rather try than regret never knowing what this could really be.” you said while reaching up with your right arm to grab his own.

Within a couple of seconds Draco had smashed his lips on your own, and you felt it. The rush, and the pure infatuation. Draco felt the exact same way.

“Then could we start now?” he said as he pulled away from the kiss.

You gave him a confused look, “What do you mean?” you asked.

He gently placed your hands in his and pulled you to your feet, “Well for starters I am going to get rid of this,” he said while he dumped the rest of the wine bottle down the sink. “Next we’re going to give you a proper bath and then i’ll help you into some of my favorite sweats, & we can lay in each other’s arms for the rest of the night?” he asked you with a loving look on his face.

“I think that’s a perfect way to start.” you said as you smiled back.

“Then take this off and get back in love.” Draco said while he pulled at your towel. You giggled at his gesture and pressed your lips to his soft ones.

He pulled away and caressed your cheek, “I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you darling.”

You smiled in response and hoped for a new life with the beautiful boy in front of you.

[lokifantasies]

Stolen (Loki/Reader)

Loki can be very annoying – you figured that out once the two of you purposely conceived a child. Every morning, he would follow you around like a lost little puppy while you got ready for work – having this compulsive need to make sure you were okay – that you were feeling fine and not vomiting all over the place.

"Loki," you rolled your eyes while washing your face in the bathroom sink – the God of Mischief protectively watching you. "Would you relax, please?" you begged him, honestly getting annoyed with his antics. "You don't need to keep following me around."

Loki's eyes widened as you put toothpaste on your toothbrush and start brushing your teeth. "What else am I supposed to do? Leave you alone? You're carrying my child, Y/N."

"This is also my child, Loki," you reminded him, your words slurring because of the paste. "You're stressing me out."

Loki let out a sigh, walked out of the bathroom, and then plopped down on the edge of the bed. You finished brushing your teeth, and you walked towards him – standing in front of him as he sat on the bed you and he share. "I'm sorry," he apologized, resting his head on the small baby bump that has started to show. "I just – I'm terrified of something happening to you...and our little one."

You ran your fingers through his hair and bent down to place a kiss on his head while he wrapped his arms around your waist. "I know you are," you comforted him. "You don't think I'm nervous?"

"I would be concerned if you weren't," Loki mumbled into your shirt.

You let out a chuckle. "The last thing I need is to feel constantly stressed out."

Loki planted a kiss on the small bump and looked up at you. "I'll try to relax."

"That's all I ask," you smiled, bending down to meet his lips halfway.

Two days – it's been two days since he promised to try to relax, and he's either not trying whatsoever, or he lied to you.

"You told me!" you yell at the god while he follows your angry stomping to the bedroom. "You promised me that you'd chill out!"

Loki scoffs. "No, I said I would try to relax," he reminds you.

Your head is about to explode – tears from your anger on the verge of spilling.

"Loki, you looked me in the face and lied to me," you grumble through gritted teeth.

Loki looks offended. "Really? You seriously believe I lied to you?" You throw your hands up in defeat and lock yourself in the bathroom – needing to get away from him in some sort of way. After a few moments of silence, you hear a soft knock on the door – a different sound from the sobs you're currently crying. "Please come out," Loki begs – hurt in his voice. You sniffle in response. "I'm -," he begins before sitting down with his back up against the door and letting out a sigh. "I'm scared to lose you," he painfully admits. You turn your eyes to the door – wondering if you should get out or not. Still, though, you remain silent – wiping your tears with the back of your hand. "When we were in the library," Loki continues to quietly speak from the other side of the door, "I, it took me a long time to accept that I wasn't dreaming." He lets out a fond chuckle. "You know that I've loved you for years – even as you slept in my brother's arms, and now – now...it's us. It's you and me – the little one you carry for us. There's a part of me that's convinced I'll lose all of this because...," he takes a deep breath, "because it wasn't supposed to be mine to begin with," his shaky voice finally admits.

You slowly get up from the bathtub and walk to the door, slowly opening it so that Loki doesn't fall backward. "That's not true," you manage to whisper – Loki looking up at you from the floor.

Loki stands up and grabs your hand – leading you to the bed and pulling you into his lap so that you straddle him. "It is true," he speaks quietly, wiping away any remaining tears you have. "I stole you...I,"

"I'm not property," you say, offended at his remark. "I chose you over Thor."

Loki gives you a sad smile. "Would we be where we are right now if I hadn't come to visit you in the library that day?"

His words hit you like a ton of bricks. Just where would the two of you be if Loki hadn't come and literally sweep you off your feet? Would you still be living the unhappy life you had with Thor? "I don't know," you quietly shrug and look down at the small bump – your hands gently rubbing it. "But that doesn't matter...you did come, and you gave me the out that I was trying so desperately to find." You grab Loki's chin and make him look at you when he tries to look away. "You're my hero," you tell him, trying to get it to stick in his head. "You saved me from, what I believed, was a loveless, toxic relationship. I'm sure I would've left Thor at some point, and I'm willing to bet that I'd still end up here – with you – and our baby."

Loki's hand goes to the back of your head, and he pulls you down so his lips can capture yours. You let out a giggle when the two of you finally break apart – finally, his gorgeous smile back on his face.

"What's so funny?" Loki asks you, grinning as he tries to figure out what you're laughing at. While biting your lip and looking at him with seductive, lust-filled eyes, you move your hips so that you can feel the bulge that is undeniably growing in his pants. "Oh, really now?" Loki returns your sultry expression – his voice deepening as his arousal grows. His hands go to your belly, and you wiggle your hips against him once more. Loki closes his eyes, trying not to lose complete control, and he gently picks you up, so he can lie you on your back. Instantly, you bend your knees and spread your legs for him, and he begins to remove your pants along with your panties. His hand finds its way to your wetness, and his fingers begin to play as you explore each other's mouth. You grab fistfuls of his hair, and he pulls away from you – his eyes completely lust-blown and his expression hungry while his other hand softly rubs your baby bump. "I should have warned you about this little kink of mine."

Taglist (let me know if you want to be added!)

@radicallyred @holdmytesseract @lokiskitten @vicmc624

[bvckys-doll]

Let me take care of you

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female!reader

Word count: 2.7k

Summary: Bucky broke up with (Y/N) a month ago and she still doesn’t know why. When she decides to visit the HQ for the first time after their break up to get the rest of her stuff, the whole team is out on a mission. (Y/N) is not prepared to meet her ex soon after her arrival. Heavily injured.

Warnings: bloody wound. (Y/N) needs to stitch him up. Blood, duh. Angsty fic with a happy ending!

Author’s note: This one-shot sat in my Bucky folder for too long so now I finally got the chance to post it. Italics is the past. I hope you like it and might leave a comment in the reply section! PLEASE! Take care of yourself, stay safe and healthy! Cosplay the Winter Soldier and PUT ON A FCKING MASK!

You can find my main masterlist here!

It was a strange feeling to walk through the hallways of the headquarters without being able to call it her home. Bucky and (Y/N) had broken off their relationship a month ago and it was still hard to process everything. Normally she wouldn’t be so tense and would walk down the hallway without a bad feeling, but the bad feeling was omnipresent.

After more than a year of their relationship, it was Bucky’s decision to end it. It had happened out of the blue, but he thought it was for the best, as the missions were getting harder and harder each time and Barnes knew that (Y/N) was worried sick.

He had often come home in the evening and found her still awake on the couch. She could not sleep if she knew that the rest of the team was on a risky mission that she could not or was not allowed to participate in.

Bucky loved (Y/N). He still knew that. Yet he had never said it out loud. Bucky knew after the first three months of their relationship that he loved her, but he was too much of a coward to tell (Y/N) the truth. What if she turned him down? What if she thought they were moving to fast? So, Bucky kept it that way and tried to show her his affection in different ways.

But in the end, the former Winter Soldier knew he could no longer keep it from her. So, James chose the simplest method: to let her go. Of course, he knew from the start that (Y/N) wouldn’t just leave. After a year of dating, she wouldn’t just leave if Bucky told her to. She would ask questions, probably cry, and beg him to try again. There was only one option: he would have to break her heart.

~

With a broad smile on her lips, (Y/N) opened the door to her room, while trying not to drop the plate of the fresh cookies she had baked and brought with her.

“Baby, you’re not gonna believe what Sam just said. ” (Y/N) chuckled and put the plate on the coffee table next to the couch when Bucky came out of the bathroom. Before she could speak up again, she paused, and her eyes widened. His eyes were swollen and red. He must have cried. A lot.

“James, what’s going on?” (Y/N) approached him and put her hands on his cheeks. Meanwhile Bucky was clenching his hands in fists to prevent himself from pulling (Y/N) close. The next words that passed his lips would not only break her heart, but also him.

“I want you to go.”

“W-what? I don’t understand. Shall I go down to the living room and leave you alone?” (Y/N) tried to make sense of his words. Another tear ran down Bucky’s cheek. Immediately she wiped it away and watched him anxiously. Slowly, he grabbed her wrists and pulled her hands from his face, whereupon (Y/N) looked at him completely disillusioned.

“I can’t be with you anymore. We are too different” James replied and stepped past her as (Y/N) froze at her place. She couldn’t quite believe what he had just said. Before she could say another word, he continued and pulled the final straw “I don’t love you…and I never loved you. This...was all just a pastime for me to feel a little better after everything that’s happened to me.”

Her back was still turned to him as Bucky saw how (Y/N) now clenched her hands into fists as well and a sob escaped her lips. How he would have loved to take her in his arms. Tell her it was all a lie to protect her. But he didn't. He stood firm and left it at that.

Without another word, (Y/N) turned on her heel and left their shared bedroom, pulling the door shut behind her with a loud bang.

~

Since the confrontation, they hadn't seen each other or exchanged another word. Natasha had packed a few things and left with (Y/N) only a few hours later after the incident. Natasha hadn't spoken a word to him since that day either.

Meanwhile, (Y/N) had been staying in a hotel for the past four weeks because she couldn’t find a new apartment so quickly. In New York it is never easy to find a good apartment and most of them are incredibly expensive. Despite (Y/N)’s constant reluctance, Tony insisted on paying for her accommodation at the hotel because she was one of his best employees.

Most of the time she worked from her hotel room, which Tony fortunately allowed her to do. Still, (Y/N) knew it couldn’t go on like this forever. Sooner or later, she’d see Bucky and the pain would come back.

According to the team’s entries in the system, everyone was on a mission near Rio de Janeiro. No one had told her why and for how long, but she knew they were not back yet. At least, that is what (Y/N) thought.

Since she still had some clothes and other stuff in their old, shared room, (Y/N) wanted to get them before the rest of the team started running around the headquarters again. So, with a moving box under her arm, she made her way to the room where she entered the usual code.

Beep!

Pushing the door open with her hip, (Y/N) groped for the light switch with her free hand. Briefly, (Y/N) squinted her eyes as the bright light illuminated the room. Why did Bucky always leave the curtains closed when he was away?

With a glance around the room, her question was answered.

The room has been left in a great mess. His shirts, shoes and sweatpants were scattered on the floor and his bed looked as if he had just got up. The cushions were either at the foot of the bed or in another corner of the room.

One of the signs for his nightmares. Things that (Y/N) wouldn’t have to deal with anymore.

Murmuring, she made room on his desk and set the box down. The first mission: the wardrobe. One of the doors was already open and one of Bucky’s knives laid on the floor. She opened the other door as well and pulled her clothes and blouses off the hangers before carefully packing them into the box.

Now it came to the sweaters.

To be honest, she sometimes didn’t even remember which ones belonged to her and which ones to Bucky, since she had usually put his shirts on instead of her own.

While (Y/N) was busy with her other t-shirts, Bucky’s red Henley shirt fell into her arms. Sighing, she held the thin, dark red material in her hands and looked at the thin seam. She probably had to mend the shirt five times already.

Suddenly the door of the room opened, and (Y/N) turned around in shock when she saw Bucky standing in the door frame. For a short moment none of them moved and they just stared at each other. (Y/N) was still holding his shirt in her hand before she quickly threw it behind her on the bed.

“What are you doing here?” they asked at the same time before Bucky raised an eyebrow and added a bit abruptly, “I live here. What’s your excuse?”

“I’m just going to get the rest of my stuff. I’ll be gone before you can count to three”, she snorted at his tone “Actually, I was hoping that- …you’re bleeding.”

(Y/N)’s gaze went to his hand, which seemed to squeeze a wound. Not successful, however, because the blood swelled through his fingers. Bucky briefly looked down at himself, pressing his hand further into his side, and gritting his teeth briefly “No shit, Sherlock.”

“Do you think now is the right time to make jokes, Barnes?” (Y/N) growled in a serious tone as Bucky pushed past her towards the bathroom. He got out of his jacket and closed his eyes while gritting his teeth. In the bright light of the ceiling lamp, (Y/N) could see the blood in his hair and the slight scratches on his face. Apparently, it had been a pretty rough mission.

“Why didn’t you go straight to Helen with an injury like that?” (Y/N) watched him throw his leather jacket into the bathtub and then leaned on the edge of the sink. Before James was about to lose consciousness, (Y/N) quickly came up to him and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, while his other hand was still pressing on the wound. He had already lost a lot of blood.

With the last strength James had left in his legs, he made it to his bed with (Y/N)’s help, where he laid down and squeezed his eyes in pain. (Y/N) quickly ran into the bathroom and dug the first aid kit out of the drawer before sitting on the edge of the bed next to Bucky, who was breathing slowly.

“You don’t need to help me” his voice was raspy as his eyelids slowly dropped.

“Hey, you’re staying with me” (Y/N) patted his cheek “Where are the others?”

(Y/N) took the scissors out of the box and used them to cut his shirt open so she could get a better view of his wound. His voice was still raspy as he replied, "There were too many. They surprised us and we weren't prepared for it. Some bastard caught me pushing Steve out of the way. What's he got that stupid shield for if it doesn't even help?"

"Is the bullet still in there?", (Y/N) asked him as she pressed a couple of compresses into his hand so he could use them to stop the bleeding, which was slowly but surely receding. Relieved, (Y/N) slumped her shoulders as he shook his head before replying, "Helen wasn't there and I didn't feel like looking for anyone else. I don't necessarily trust the others. Clint flew me in quickly and then flew right back. I told him the wound was already closing up."

“This lie could have killed you, you know that, right? If I hadn’t been here, you would have collapsed in the bathroom and probably died of blood loss.” (Y/N) answered as she tried to get the thread through the head of the needle, which was not as easy as she thought. Probably it was also because her hands were shaking, which Bucky noticed when he watched (Y/N) “I would have made it somehow.”

But the way (Y/N) looked down at him was enough for him to shut up. Knowing it was a straight lie. And he had to admit that he wouldn’t have cared if it had happened like that. (Y/N) was gone. He had lost her, and that was all his fault.

Attentively James watched her as she prepared everything and checked again and again if the wound was still bleeding heavily. After it had slowly but surely subsided, (Y/N) removed the compress from his stomach and glanced at the gaping wound. Sighing, she took the disinfectant and dripped some onto a cloth before looking at James, who understood immediately before he said “I'm used to the pain, you know that. Don't worry about it. "

“You don't need to play hero here, James. I know how much that it hurts.” (Y/N) muttered, holding the cloth tightly before pressing it to the wound. Briefly, Bucky's chest heaved, and he growled in pain, breaking (Y/N)'s heart in the process, before she finally managed to take the cloth down and throw it away.

Quickly she took some of the numbing gel and smeared it around the wound before looking to Bucky, “I'm stitching it up now as best as I can. I'll have Helen look at it as soon as she gets back.”

Without another word from Bucky, (Y/N) began stitching up his wound. She was still shaking a little, but slowly it was getting better. Finally, she bandaged the wound with a compress and took care of the small scratches on his cheek.

They hadn't been this close in a long time. (Y/N) didn't even notice how she held her breath as she ran the disinfectant over the wounds. Bucky gritted his teeth again for a moment, but his gaze didn't avert from her.

Calmly, she stuck a band-aid over the wound and gave it another quick brush with her thumb as it blurted out of Bucky, "I lied."

Bucky watched her reaction carefully as she removed her hand from his cheek and held his gaze. His gaze wandered to the ceiling, kneading his hands nervously. He added, "When I said you were just a pastime and I didn't love you, I lied. That's not true. "

"Then why do you say such a thing?", (Y/N) asked him in a calm voice that didn't show if she was amazed, sad, or angry. Bucky himself was afraid of any of these reactions.

Desperately, he tried to find the right words "I was worried about you. This life with me could break you. You haven’t slept for weeks because of me. Because you're always so worried about me and while doing so, you forget to take care of you. When I…come back from missions, you're still awake because you want to know that I got home safely. You…you're too good for me and I don't want to destroy you like I've already destroyed everything else around me. I got you-. "

"You've already destroyed me, James. ", (Y/N) interrupted, looking at him with glazed eyes. This was exactly what he tried to avoid. He never wanted to be the reason why she felt bad, but now his worst fear had come true.

"You successfully broke my heart when you told me I was nothing more than a silly pastime you're done with now. I thought that you…I thought that we will go on like this forever. Do you know how happy you've made me? You were the one I could imagine anything with. I never wanted kids. I never wanted to get married, only to get divorced three years later. I never wanted this. But then you came along and showed me that there is a man who could make this all a possibility. A family. A life together. . . "

Tears were streaming down his cheeks when he saw her sitting in front of him throwing all this at his head. He had been such a coward. If he had just talked to her and told her everything, it would never have come to this.

But he was scared. Scared of being rejected again like all the other women did it before. But his (Y/N) wasn’t like them, but he couldn’t bear the thought that she might be.

“I love you, doll. I really do.” Bucky sobbed and wiped the tears from her eyes as (Y/N) looked at him and her eyes were just as swollen as his own before he continued, “I love you more than anything and I-I was stupid because I once again thought only of myself and…and not of the consequences. I love you and I don’t want to lose you. You’re all I have left. ”

Sniffing, (Y/N) looked at the man she loved more than anything. How he lay there on the bed, showing his most vulnerable side. He always appeared so strong in front of everyone so they would not see the real Bucky. But this man was so exhausted by everything that had happened to him. He didn’t want to have those thoughts. These doubts. That fear. He just wanted to live a happy and fulfilled life with (Y/N).

Slowly, she moved closer to him on the mattress and brushed the hair out of his face, which was still a bit sticky because of the blood. Gently, she leaned down to him and embraces him as best she could without touching his wound.

At first, he remained calm, then he wrapped his arms around her center and pulled her into his arms until finally she lay next to him in the bed. The two were sobbing in each other’s arms with (Y/N) running her fingers through his hair. Again, and again.

“I love you, James Barnes. So so much.” (Y/N) muttered as she buried her face in his neck while she was still fondled the back of his head. “But I swear to God, if you do this again, I’ll send Natasha after you and you know what she is capable of.”

“Of course, I know that. I taught her well.” Bucky mumbled while he held her close “I’ll never let you go again. I promise.”

[master-sass-blast]

Care and Trust: Chapter One.

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four

Summary: "The shockwave hits second.

You’re strolling through Avatar Korra park, out on your lunch break. It’s a beautiful, late winter day; with the sun shining high up in the sky, it’s warm enough that you aren’t shivering like a frightened kitten as you amble along the plaza.

Several people gasp, and you look up in time to see a fireball pluming up over the docks.

And then the shockwave hits.

It hits your chest like an armadillo tiger; the explosion roars through the air, making your ears hurt. You go down, grunting when you hit the snow-covered knoll behind you.

You stand with a groan, brush yourself off, then start booking it to the nearest hospital.

Shit like this always demands all hands on deck."

AKA Plot Finally Happens.

Pairing(s): Lin Beifong x Reader.

Rating: T.

Word count: 2.1k.

The shockwave hits second.

You’re strolling through Avatar Korra park, out on your lunch break. It’s a beautiful, late winter day; with the sun shining high up in the sky, it’s warm enough that you aren’t shivering like a frightened kitten as you amble along the plaza.

(But, as they say, all good things must come to an end.)

Several people gasp, and you look up in time to see a fireball pluming up over the docks.

And then the shockwave hits.

It hits your chest like an armadillo tiger; the explosion roars through the air, making your ears hurt. You go down, grunting when you hit the snow-covered knoll behind you.

Cries pierce the air. Screams of panic, exclamations of disbelief, exhortations to call the police.

Yeah, you think as you eye the thick, black smoke that belches into the air, something tells me they didn’t miss that.

You stand with a groan, brush yourself off, then start booking it to the nearest hospital.

Shit like this always demands all hands on deck.

***

As predicted, the injury count is high.

You run the halls of Yue General, triaging the more serious patients until things slow enough that you can start checking the ones not actively dying. It’s a non-stop frenzy of gauze, saline, and bandage wraps until you can see the blue glow of your healing whenever you close your eyes.

By the end of it, your feet are practically dead and it’s nearly four in the morning.

You drag yourself onto one of the trams and let the teeth-shaking rattle keep you awake until you’re on your block. You count your steps until you make it to the front door, then let out a sigh of relief when you step into the building lobby.

“Elevator Out of Service. Please Use Stairs.”

You stare at the placard in front of the elevator bay in disbelief, then groan. Fuck my life.

***

The climb up to your floor is agony.

You’re huffing and puffing by the time you make it to your apartment door. You lean against it as you slot the key into the lock, then push inside.

Some distant, responsible part of you manages to turn the deadbolt before your brain shuts off entirely. You kick off your shoes, drop your purse on the ground, then shuffle over to the couch and flop down face first on it.

When you lift your head again, sunlight’s streaming through your living room window.

“Fuck.” You wince, then peel yourself gingerly off the couch. You cringe as your body protests, and rub your hand over the back of your aching neck. You glance at the clock, but the gurgle your stomach makes is more than enough to tell you that it’s past lunch time.

You sit up, then frown when you get a whiff of yourself. Antiseptic and B.O. Not a good combination on anyone.

You need a shower. And food. And a good round of stretching.

Nice, long, hot shower. You smile as you shuffle towards the bathroom. And then take out. Narook’s. With extra squid ink noodles. Your stomach rumbles again. And maybe Golden King’s… mmm, extra summer rolls… with sweet and sour dipping sauce. Yum.

***

You feel more human after showering. You change into sweats and a loose shirt, put in delivery orders at Narook’s and Golden King’s, then flip on your radio before dropping down onto your sofa.

It’s too early in the day for mystery shows, but the disc jockey’s still playing music requests. Smooth jazz --something with a rolling beat and brass--pipes out of the speakers, swirling around your apartment until the mental grime of the previous day starts to fade.

You sink back into your couch and hum along. You sigh and stretch, relish in the ache in your legs as tension leeches from your sore muscles.

The radio hums, then crackles. “We interrupt this broadcast for an announcement from the Republic City Police Department.”

You roll your eyes as an announcer rattles off a report about the explosion yesterday --site is secure, no risk of further fire or explosion, the city police are hard work, stay clear of the site, blah blah blah--then relax when your music starts playing again. Thanks for telling us what we already know. You close your eyes and let yourself drift. Why do they always shove that into every single press release? ‘We’re working hard to serve Republic City and ensure the safety of her citizens--’

Lin.

You gasp and bolt upright; she would’ve attended the scene. Hell, for all you know, she was one of the responding officers.

It’s probable, given her propensity for “hands on police work,” for not staying above the grime and grunge her officers have to work on.

Hell, it’s even likely. Given what you know about Lin, you’d be solid money that she’d rather work the explosion site than deal with the panicking politicians.

Is she okay? You chew on your lower lip as the thought circles your mind like water in the bathtub drain, swirling down and down into blackness.

You blink, and then your phone’s in your hand, and there’s hold music in your ear as the operator makes the connection. You gulp and palm your phone once the music stops and the ringing starts. Please don’t let this be a mistake, please don’t let this be a mistake, please don’t let this be a fucking mistake…

“Chief Beifong’s office. This is her assistant, Ryu, speaking. The Chief is not available at this time, but I can take your message and deliver it to her later.”

You blink at the sound of her assistant’s voice. “Uh… hi…” You swallow, then rattle off your name and callback number before Ryu can hang up on you. “I’m a, uh, friend of Lin’s. I was just calling because --y’know--the explosion--”

“I’m sorry, but the Chief cannot comment on an ongoing investigation--”

“I’m not calling about that,” you interject, pinching the bridge of your nose. “I’m her friend; I just want to be sure she’s okay.”

There’s a pause on the other end of the line, and when Ryu speaks again, she almost sounds… pleased? “Chief Beifong’s not in right now --but I’ll have her call you back as soon as she’s available.”

“Is she hurt?” you blurt before she hangs up on you.

Another pause. “As far as I know, no.”

“Okay.” You nod, gulp, then nod again. “Thank you.”

“Of course. Have a nice day.”

You eke out something similar, then put your phone back on the hook when the line goes dead. Your heart thuds uncomfortably hard in your chest, and you have to blink a few times before your brain starts working again.

You head back to your couch and jazz --but long gone is your relaxed, exhaustion induced stupor. Anxiety claws at your chest, threatening to snap your ribs and leave you bleeding. You inhale deeply through your nose, then force yourself to let it out slowly so your body calms down. She’ll be fine. She’s got, what, thirty years on the force? This is old hat for her. She’ll keep herself safe.

Still, if you spend the next couple hours watching your phone, that’s no one’s business but yours.

***

Your phone rings around seven in the evening --right as you’re shovelling leftovers from lunch into your mouth.

Go figure.

You half-scramble, half-try-to-not-choke over to the phone; you pick up the phone, try to swallow, then tuck the food in your cheek like a hamster when it’s apparent you’ve got too much in your mouth to swallow. Mom always said I ate like a pack of polar bear dogs. “Heffo?”

There’s a dry huff of laughter on the other end of the line. “I take it I caught you at a good time.”

“Lin!” You cover your mouth with one hand (even though she can’t see you) and alternate between chewing and swallowing. “I --I was ea’in ‘inner.”

“Sounds like you decided to do it all at once.” She chuckles when you grumble, then moves on. “My secretary said you called?”

“Yeah, around lunch time,” you say as you finally get your mouth clear.

“Where I’m presuming you had your mouth full of that meal, too.”

“Fuck you.” You grin when she laughs, then lean against the wall and cradle the receiver against your shoulder. “I just… wanted to check on you. With the explosion and all.”

“You heard about that.”

“The whole city heard it, Lin.” You sigh. “I worked the triage team at Yue General until four in the morning.”

“Shit.” Lin groans, and you can hear the creak of her leather office chair as she sits. “I thought you only did massage therapy?”

“They call everyone who passed a healing course when stuff like this happens,” you explain. “Besides, I had to pass an intensive injury treatment course to get my rehabilitation certification. I’m licensed to assist surgery teams, if need arises.”

Lin hums. “That’s a nice feather in your cap.”

“It pays the bills.” You manage a smile when she lets out a huff of laughter, but the anxiety that’s been circling your brain descends to your stomach. You swallow, then ask, “Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” When you don’t respond right away, her voice softens. “I’m fine. A little banged up, but nothing that won’t heal. I wasn’t there when the explosion went off.”

“Okay,” you murmur. You let out a shaky breath, then mentally kick yourself to stop acting like a worried girlfriend, dammit. “Well, if something doesn’t heal, you know where to find me.”

Lin grunts, then chuckles when you laugh. “Get some rest, kid.”

“Already am. You should do the same.” You roll your eyes when she starts grumbling again --about overtime and press conferences and departmental cooperation with the city’s fire brigade--then say, “Call me when you want to keep me up all night again,” and hang up before she can react.

It’s easy to picture her reaction. Open-mouthed, wide-eyed, with that hint of a grin that she hides by smirking.

You bite your lower lip; something warm and smooth settles in your lower gut. You laugh quietly to yourself, then turn and head back for the sofa. Alright, leftovers. It’s just you and me.

***

You’re in the midst of changing the sheets on your massage table when there’s a knock on the door. “Come in.”

The latch clicks, the door swings open, and the receptionist for the Northern Moon Physical Therapy Facility pokes her head into your “office” (which is really just the room you work out of, but it’s yours, and that’s what counts). “A call came in for you.”

You straighten, frowning. “Me?”

She nods. “A request for on-site treatment.” She looks down at the slip of paper in her hand and recites the information from the call. “Republic City Police Department, at one this afternoon. Long session booking. A woman named Ryu called it in.”

Your heart sinks into your shoes. Fucking dammit. “And my other appointments…”

“We’re redistributing them to the other therapists. It was an urgent request.”

Shit.

You sigh, then nod and grab your carry bag off a nearby office chair. “Let me pack up, and I’ll catch one of the trams.”

“They’re sending a car for you.” The receptionist smiles politely, then steps back and starts making her way back down the hall. “It’ll be here in fifteen minutes!”

You run your tongue over your teeth and do what you can to tamp down the aggravation simmering in your stomach. Well, on the bright side, I don’t have to carry the table the entire way.

***

Ryu meets you in the parking garage attached to the police department. She’s sleek, dressed in an impeccably pressed navy blue suit, and there’s not a hair out of place on her head.

In your loose slacks, pale periwinkle blouse, and slapdash braid, you can’t help but feel a bit… frumpy.

She shakes your hand --she’s got a strong, professional handshake--then escorts you through the garage. “Thank you for coming.” She opens a heavy metal door stamped with the police department’s emblem for you. “I’ll take you up to Chief Beifong’s office.”

Your jaw flexes as you follow her down a hall with an immaculately polished slate tile floor. “How’s she been? What kind of pain has she been in?”

Ryu looks at you over her shoulder for a long moment. Her eyes narrow contemplatively, but she turns back around before you can make anything of her expression. “I’ve been asked to let Chief Beifong explain things to you directly.”

Yeah, that tracks. You shift the strap of your carry bag onto your shoulder, then watch the floor counter as the elevator slowly rattles upwards.

[eternalsimp]

Cursed Fears (pt 2)

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Smut

Word Count: 3703

Warnings: NSFW 18+, Aged up Megumi, mentions of violence, character death, swearing, use of female pronouns and anatomy, angst, slight praise kink, oral sex (f. receiving) Minors DNI.

Author Note: This is a sequel but it can be read as a stand-alone. pt 1 is up on my blog and pt 3 will be posted soon.

Megumi’s POV

Everything was dark and the smell of blood was overwhelming. I couldn’t tell where I was exactly, I knew I was in the domain of a special grade but I was sure I had gone home to y/n. Nobara, Yuji, and I had exorcised a second-grade curse and had called it a night. So where did this domain come from? How did I get here? I could swear I could hear thunder crack every now and then, but I can’t even remember if there was a storm when I was here with Yuji and Nobara. Where was Gojo when I needed him? I stumbled through the darkness blindly before I was met with a sight that made my heart drop.

Sukuna sat lazily on his throne, his red eyes trained on me in a predatory glare, sharp nails tapping impatiently on his temple. “It's about time you showed up, I thought I was going to have my fun without you. Now that you’re here, we can continue.” Sukuna’s mouth pulled into a sinister grin as I stared at the limp figure at the foot of his throne.

“Y/n…” her name came out as barely a whisper, my throat felt like it was closing up. She was at home studying for her statistics class, I know she was. I shook my head violently before pressing the heels of my hands to my eyes. This isn’t real.

“What’s wrong little sorcerer? Not feeling so tough anymore are you? You were so confident you could take me on earlier, so come on, take her back. Until you do I may have to play with her a little bit more, show her that she was never safe from me.” Sukuna reached down and pulled her unconscious body up into his lap. He held her jaw with one hand and turned her face so I could see. I wanted to scream at him not to touch her, or to hurt me instead, but nothing came out. Every part of my body was frozen in place at the sight of her tortured body. Sukuna could see me struggling in his domain and smirked down at me. He slowly dragged his mouth up her throat and to the shell of her ear. “Time to wake up princess, our guest is here.” Sukuna squeezed her throat at the same time he nipped her ear and her eyes flew open to immediately fall on me.

“No, please let her go.” The words finally came but I still couldn’t move. She looked so scared, the person I love most is in danger and I couldn’t do anything about it. I forced myself forward a single step but it felt like I was sinking into the ground. Why can’t I move? “I’ll do anything you want, but please don’t hurt her.”

“I told you what I wanted, I told you to come and get her. Show me just how strong you are.” Sukuna taunted. With a firm grip on my girlfriend's jaw and his other hand traveling down her body, Sukuna was in complete control. I know I can’t use cursed energy or shikigami here or I would risk her becoming collateral damage, but I couldn’t stand still and do nothing.

“‘Gumi, help me.” Her voice was shaking, her entire body trembling. I wanted nothing more than to whisk her away to safety. Her eyes squeezed shut as Sukunas mouth attacked her neck and left dark bruises in its wake.

“Time’s running out kid, I’m starting to get bored.” Sukuna’s free hand began to snake over her legs, dragging his razor-sharp nails over the soft skin there, leaving angry red scratches behind. Tears began to fall freely from her eyes and I tried to force myself forward again to no avail. Whimpers and cries for help begin to fall from her lips faster, and god I feel like I’m in hell. All I can do is watch as she cries out in fear, heart cracking at every sound she makes. Finally, she says something that makes me feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest

“You did this to me, this is your fault.” My body felt numb at the sound of her broken words. All I can do is shake my head and beg, beg Sukuna for mercy, and beg her for forgiveness.

“Baby it’ll be okay, you’ll be okay. I’m so sorry.”

“You said you would protect me, why did you do this to me?”

“I’m sorry, I’m gonna get you out of here. Please believe me, my love.” I was on my knees before the king of curses now. So close I could pick up on her perfume that smells sickly sweet of roses, but the smell I adore so much was tainted with something else now.

Sukuna clicked his tongue and shook his head. “You know better than to make promises you can’t keep, right?” My whole body was shaking with fear and rage at the curse, but all I could do was bargain.

“Please, I swear I will do anything, just let her go.” I couldn’t tear my eyes away from her, pleading to just see her leave here alive. Sukuna’s nails dug deeper into her throat, drawing blood as it trickled down her neck and chest in small streams.

“I think I’d rather punish you and the brat for trapping me in this vessel. You get to watch as I kill her, and then I’ll switch out with him so he can see what he’s done.” Sukuna leaned down to face me. “This is what happens when self-righteous sorcerers need to learn their place, so don’t blame me for what happens next.”

Fear shot through my entire body at those words. I couldn’t help but scream loudly as Sukuna jerked her head and a loud, sickening crack filled my ears.

I shot straight up in bed as a crack of thunder rumbled through the apartment. My eyes were unfocused as I dragged myself towards the bathroom and a wave of nausea washed over me. I barely made it to the toilet before I was vomiting into it. My knees burned from where they hit the tile but all I can think about was the sound of her whimpers and begs for help ringing in my ears. I was vaguely aware of the shirt sticking to me with sweat as I tried to control my erratic breathing. Thunder cracked again, sounding eerily like the way her neck snapped in my nightmare and I was retching again.

The cycle continued for what felt like hours until I was left coughing and dry heaving. As the panic started to ebb away I noticed the presence of my girlfriend on the floor behind me, running her hands soothingly over my back, and lightly pressing her thumbs into my spine. She had her knees on either side of my waist and was resting her head between my shoulder blades. I reached up to flush the toilet before gently squeezing her knee to let her know I was okay. She wordlessly pulled my sweaty shirt over my head to let the cool air hit my back before lifting herself off of the floor and out of the bathroom.

I shifted my body so I could press my forehead against the hard plastic of the bathtub. After a couple minutes, she handed me a bottle of water and pressed a cold, damp cloth to the back of my neck. “I’m sorry I woke you up,” voice raspy from coughing and throwing up. This wasn’t the first time I had woken her with my nightmares, and I doubt it would be the last. She reclaims her spot on the floor behind me and continues rubbing my back.

“Don’t be sorry, I prefer to be woken up by you going to the bathroom than you throwing up in the bed anyway.” I can’t help but laugh at her teasing and we could both feel the unease begin to fade.

“Yeah, that's a good point. You’re too good to me, you know that?” I moved so that I was leaning back against her chest and she wrapped her arms around my shoulders protectively.

“Nope, I refuse to accept that statement because we are the perfect amount of goodness to each other.” I tilted my head back to rest it on her shoulder before pressing a quick kiss to her neck. I couldn’t help but wonder how I was lucky enough for Nobara to introduce the two of us. It was in the small, intimate moments like these that I knew I would happily go to my grave protecting her.

Reader’s POV

“Okay you know the drill,” you said to him as you held out your hands expectantly. He smiled as he placed both his hands in yours, palm up. You pressed one of his hands to your chest and the other to his so he could feel both of your heartbeats under his fingertips. The first time you did this he scoffed at how cheesy it was, but over the two years of living together, it became common practice for when he was trying to calm down after a nightmare. You didn’t like to press him about the horrors that plagued his dreams, knowing how reserved he was with his emotions, so you found your own ways to comfort him.

“See, we’re both okay. Do you wanna get up to go lay back down or do you need a second?” He shook his head and pulled himself up to sit in front of you again.

“No, I’m okay, but can we do the other thing too?” he asked sheepishly. He turned pleading eyes towards you, and how could you refuse him when he asked so nicely.

“Of course, whatever you need. You or me?”

He took a shuddering breath before whispering “you” so softly you almost didn’t hear it. Your shoulders slumped as that one word told you everything you needed to know. The other practice that became a common occurrence after his chronic nightmares was kissing the other person's phantom injuries. More often than not it was him kissing you, as you were usually the object of his nightmares, like tonight. He liked being able to physically see and feel that the wounds inflicted on you were in fact not real. This nighttime routine often led to some heavy makeout sessions, which then led to very soft and intimate sex.

“Okay baby,” You stand up and move to sit on the side of the bed while he brushes his teeth quickly to get rid of the gross taste in his mouth. While you wait, you find yourself tugging at the bottom of your shorts self-consciously as you shiver in anticipation. After a moment your boyfriend waltzed out of the bathroom and rested his hands on either side of your waist. He bent his head to capture your lips in a slow kiss. His tongue swipes at your bottom lip, silently asking permission to deepen the kiss and you happily oblige him. Your mouths move in a small fight for dominance but a firm hand on your thigh has him easily winning. Your hands trailed up to rest on his shoulders as he took your bottom lip between his teeth and bit down gently.

You gasp softly into his mouth and he brings one hand up to rest at the nape of your neck as he cradles your head protectively. He draws his lips down the side of your jaw, paying special attention to the spot behind your ear that never fails to have you melting into his hands. You tilt your head to give him better access to your throat, allowing him to deliver individual kisses to the spots where you likely had been hurt.

In a swift, fluid motion, he is pulling your tank top off of you and trailing sloppy kisses down your chest and stomach. You lean back onto your elbows as he runs his hands over your thighs, leaving goosebumps in their wake. You let out a shaky breath as he begins to kiss his way up the inside of your legs. “Just relax baby. I’m gonna take care of you.” He punctuated each word with a kiss or nip to the inside of your thighs, and you could feel the arousal pool at the pit of your stomach.

You forced yourself to make eye contact just in time to see a devious smirk grace his features. Before you could question it he is yanking down your shorts and blowing cool air onto your core. You yelp and instinctively try to snap your knees shut. He chuckles lowly to himself before tossing your shorts somewhere behind him. He brings his face back between your thighs to lick a long, hot stripe up your core. You gasp loudly and let your arms give out behind you. He reaches one hand up to where you are clawing at the sheets to intertwine your fingers together.

“My pretty baby is already so worked up and I’ve barely touched you. What a good girl.” He lowers himself back down to lap up the arousal dripping onto your legs before sucking your clit into his mouth. You arch into him and groan loudly which prompts him to hum triumphantly around the bundle of nerves. He moves his free hand down to expertly curl two fingers into you and starts pumping in and out at a steady pace. After a few pumps of his hand, he curls his fingers to find the spot inside you that has you seeing stars.

The combination of his mouth and fingers working you is dizzying and you can feel it pushing you closer to the edge of your climax. He could feel how close you were and began to move with more purpose, determined to make you cum more than once in the night. With the hand that isn’t intertwined with his, you reach down to tangle in his soft hair. “Wait, I- oh shit- I’m gonna cum.”

He removes the hand that was holding yours from you and brings his thumb down to rub circles into your sensitive clit. “Come on baby, I got you. You can cum for me.” He moves his mouth to rejoin his fingers at your slit to bring you closer to your high. A particularly hard press of his thumb has you crying out in pleasure and grinding desperately against his face. He removes his fingers from you and replaces them with his tongue to help you ride out your high. He greedily drinks up your release until you are weakly nudging him away.

“Do you want me to stop?” He looked up at you innocently, which was contradicting when you remembered the things he was doing mere seconds prior.

“No, I just want to feel more of you.” You could feel a hot blush creep up your body at the realization that he was still halfway clothed, while you laid completely naked in front of him. His brain seemed to process this at the same time because he was quickly ridding himself of his sweatpants and grey boxers.

His hard cock thumps softly against his toned stomach when he stood again and you were having a hard time not staring at the man in front of you. He wasn’t bulky, but the muscles that rippled underneath taut skin were nothing to sneeze at. He glanced up and caught your stare, and returned it with a cocky smirk. “See something you like?”

“I sure do,” you flashed an innocent smile as you sat up and palmed his erection. He gasped at your sudden boldness and leaned onto the bed for support. At this proximity, you were able to tug his earlobe between your teeth and bite down gently. “Please baby, I want you so bad.” Those words snap him back into action and he’s crashing his lips against yours again.

He moves you back up the bed and crawls over your body. He braces his forearms on either side of your head and experimentally grinds his hip against yours. You let out a soft “please” that comes out whinier than you intend. You lean your face up to give him a soft kiss before he reaches down to line himself up with you and slowly presses the tip inside. He shallowly thrusts to slowly work into you, mumbling praises against your skin as he moves deeper.

You can’t help but wince at the stretch his cock always brings you, which would border on outright painful if he didn’t feel so good. Your head falls back against the bed, clawing at his back to try to find something to ground yourself. He glances down to where he is buried deep inside you before pressing his forehead to yours. “I know sweetheart, it's almost there. You’re- fuck- doing so good for me,” he reassures as he presses a soothing kiss to your temple.

When he finally bottoms out he stills his hips to let you get comfortable and adjust to him. He takes this opportunity to pepper your face and chest in kisses and returns one of his hands to your neck where it cradles your head. You bring one of your hands to his hair to tug gently before rolling your hips against him, eliciting a breathy moan from him. “You can move baby, I’m okay.”

He nods and gives a couple of slower thrusts before setting a steady pace. He opted for slower deep strokes which made you feel every inch of him as he thrust into you. His thrusts have his cock brushing all the right spots inside you, and all you can do is gasp and moan for him while clinging to his shoulders. “Megumi, please,” you aren’t even sure what you were asking for. The pleasure has your head spinning and unable to make complete thoughts.

You can tell he is getting closer to his own climax because his thrusts are getting progressively faster and he is getting more vocal. “God, baby you’re taking me so well.” He hooks one of your legs around his waist and the new angle lets him hit your sweet spot with every roll of his hips. Your nails dig into his shoulders as you feel another climax approaching, and Megumi picks up his pace again.

“Is my pretty girl gonna cum for me again?” You bury your face into his shoulder and nod. He moves one of his hands to play with your clit to push you over the edge. You arch into him and let out a strangled moan as your orgasm washes over you. You’re sure you’re leaving deep scratches across his back as you grip him tighter. His hips stutter as you clench around him and he gives a few more sloppy thrusts before he’s cumming too with a loud groan. He unconsciously rocks into you lazily as you both come down from your highs.

“Are you okay baby?” He kisses your forehead and strokes your side to try and bring you back to reality. You nod again, not quite trusting your voice yet. He chuckles and slowly pulls out to not overstimulate you. You squirm at the uncomfortable stickiness between your legs but he’s already moving to the bathroom to grab stuff to clean you up.

When he comes back out he runs a warm cloth along the inside of your thighs and quickly over your center, which has you wincing at the sensitivity. When he's done he pulls out a pair of your pajama shorts and one of his loose shirts for you to wear. He helps you slip the clothes on and tugs his boxers back up before climbing back into bed with you.

You stand up to crack open the window next to the bed before laying with your back against his chest. The cool air from the rain seeps into the room and he mutters a “thank you” into your shoulder, surprised that you remember he runs hot for the rest of the night when he has a nightmare.

The clock on the bedside table shows that it's about 5:30 in the morning, so you estimate that he woke up roughly at 4. “Do you feel okay enough to go back to sleep?” You feel him shrug behind you and you scoot closer to him, pulling one of his arms over your waist to lace your fingers together.

“I don’t know. I should but…” you hear his voice trail off and nod in understanding. He always has a hard time falling back asleep on nights like these. He warned you about his chronic nightmares shortly before moving in together and confessed that he’s had them since he started high school at Jujustu Tech. However, you take small comfort in the knowledge that since living together they’ve gotten less frequent, and his reactions to them have become far less violent.

“Will you feel better if one of your shikigami sleeps in here? Just so you know that nothing will happen.” He considers it for a minute before tugging his hand out of yours, circling his other arm around your waist, and folding his hands to summon his divine dog. Its head pokes out of the shadows under the window. You pat the empty spot on the bed and it jumps up excitedly before laying down and letting you scratch behind its ears.

Megumi chuckles behind you and shakes his head. “You just wanted the dog on the bed didn’t you?” He reaches over to ruffle its soft fur as it dozes off.

“Checkmate,” you crane your head to place a kiss on his cheek before settling back against him. “Now will you please try to go back to sleep? I don’t want to nag you but realistically you can’t function on only two hours of sleep.”

“I’ll try but I can’t make any promises you know.” He tucks his chin on top of your head and relaxes around you. You hum in acknowledgment before slowly drifting back to sleep.