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winter-turtle · 3 years

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House Of Wolves - Chapter 3 - Winterturtle - Multifandom [Archive of Our Own]

Chapter 3: Hope Is Fatal

(posting now because I'm a dumbass and I forgot to post it here after I put it on AO3)

Bound to a chair, he couldn’t move around too much. He was in pain.

“You need to learn how to be still.”

No, stop.

“The pain won’t be as bad once you stop squirming.”

He tried, but he couldn’t stifle the scream completely.

“Do you think someone else will give you a breather?”

It hurts.

“It’s for your own good.”

Peter’s eyes flew open with sharp intake of breath. He wouldn’t scream. He couldn’t. He’d learned long ago not to do it as it would show his enemies that he was weak.

And Peter wasn’t weak.

His hammering heart started to slow down to a more reasonable pace as his eyes adjusted to the dark, scanning his surroundings. The memory (nightmare?) began to fade into the back of his mind upon taking in the familiar shapes of his room.

When did he stopped thinking about it as a cell?

He was safe. Nobody could touch him here.

But… he didn’t fall asleep here. He didn’t remember walking back here either, so that only meant that someone had to carry him.

Again, he suspected who.

When one spends most of the time in confinement, it was only natural that they had a lot of time to think about things. That’s exactly how Peter was doing. He thought. He wondered. He went over every single interaction he’s had with the heroes in hopes of figuring out the reason why they were… trying.

More precisely why Stark was trying. Yes, the man might be persistent and his stubbornness seemed to turn everything into a disaster as the trip to the gym had proven, but Peter just couldn’t sense any hostile intent.

None of this made any sense. Why would people like the Avengers show any care to him?

“Hurting their own children is not something normal parents do.”

Peter shook his head. Those stupid words refused his mind since they left Stark’s mouth. “Normal parents…” he said softly under his breath, as if testing how the words felt. Normal. How normal parents behaved? How would his life turn out to be if he had normal life?

Then again, he never was normal, was he?

Deciding that the constant swirling of his thoughts won’t let him fall back asleep, Peter slipped from underneath the covers and walked towards the door. Moving around always helped. He stood there for a moment before placing his hand on the handle. What were the chances of it opening?

“Here goes nothing.”

He pushed and to his surprise, the door opened. “Huh.” Okay, so he wasn’t locked, but there was no doubt that the AI was watching his every move. Well, don’t look gifted horse in the mouth, he thought as he walked.

Turn the corner, first window, second window, third window…

Peter stopped before the fourth window. He didn’t get past this point the last time. “Okay,” he whispered to himself, raising his hand, “okay.” Ever so slowly and with bated breath, his hand inched towards the invisible barrier. His heartbeat picked up as he expected the stabbing pain any second.

But no pain came. No stabbing of needles, no sudden lightheadedness and no sudden loss of consciousness. Peter only released the breath when his hand was fully outstretched in front of him.

Peter put his other hand in front of him and took a step forward. Then another one. Then another one and then, when he realized that nothing was about to happed, lowered his hands so he wouldn’t look like a total weirdo that was pretending to walk like a zombie.

Stark kept his word.

Another speck of doubt fell on what once used to be carefully balanced scales, tilting it even more.

More or less, Peter found his way to the gym by following his nose. The room was dark, only illuminated by the moonlight streaming in through the windows under the tall ceiling. The light fell on various machines which in turn threw long shadows all around the room. When Peter was little, he’d been terrified of shadows like these. He’d felt like they would turn into a monster that would drag him away.

And then he’d spent five days in almost complete dark all on his own.

“See? That wasn’t so bad,” his mother smiled sweetly after he was let out, tired and with dried tear tracks on his cheeks. “The only monsters in the world are those people who call themselves heroes.”

Okay, no. He was getting side-tracked. A nice workout session was bound to clear his head.

Soon, Peter fell into a familiar routine. Warm-up, push-ups, sit-ups, some gymnastics… it did wonders to his mind. For the first time in four weeks, he felt himself truly relax.

Still, a tiny part of him remained on edge. Maybe it was the childish part of him that somehow remained in him despite the countless attempts to beat it out of him, but he could swear he saw the shadows shift every once in a while. Yet every time he looked, there was nothing amiss – just the same equipment sitting on the same spot.

Peter dropped down from the rings with almost inaudible thump. His eyes closed.

“A bit late for a workout.”

Peter whipped around, pinpointing the source of voice. Black Widow sat on a nearby bench, almost shrouded by the shadows, her gaze trained on the dumbbell in her hand.

So he wasn’t paranoid; it was most likely her who caused the occasional shift of the shadows. But that left one question.

Why didn’t his spidey-sense alert him to her presence?

“I must say, that was quite impressive set of moves.”

“What are you doing here?” Peter asked instead.

She switched arms. “I live here. Can’t I come for a late-night workout session too?”

Peter opted to remain silent. The woman continued through her set before standing up and putting the dumbbell to its original spot. “Care to give me a hand?” she asked as she lied down on a bench and grabbed ahold of a barbell.

Not a single of her footsteps could be heard, even with his super hearing. Peter found it impressive.

He didn’t know why, but he followed. He got ahold of the metal bar, securing it in case Romanov’s arms would buckle.

“You know,” she began, her voice slightly strained, “I always come here too when sleep seems impossible. Those night when something is keeping you up…”

Silence.

“So, what kept you up? You looked pretty tired at the movies.”

Peter huffed. “What kept you up?”

She shrugged. For a while, Peter thought that was the end of the conversation, but the universe loved to prove him wrong.

“It’s confusing, isn’t it? When two worlds clash and suddenly you are left to question everything.”

Peter didn’t like the direction the conversation was headed. “What do you know?”

“A lot.”

Okay, even if Peter was vaguely aware of Romanov’s background, the answer wasn’t helpful at all. “Why?”

“Why what?”

“Despite the warning, despite me saying what I did… you know I could just let go of this barbell and let it crush your throat. Nobody would be able to do anything to stop me.”

“Then by all means do. Feel free. You have a perfect opportunity,” she said, perfectly unfazed.

Peter stared at her as if she was a particularly difficult piece of puzzle.

She wasn’t afraid of him.

Why wasn’t she afraid of him?

The weight gave a sudden jerk down. Peter instinctively gripped it, preventing it from dipping further. His slightly widened brown eyes locked with Romanov’s green, trying to read them, although unsuccessfully. But whatever the woman was looking for in his, she must have found it.

With a final grunt, Romanov put the weight back and stood up. She gave Peter a onceover before nodding to herself and then headed to the door, dabbing her sweat away with the towel.

“Why did you come here?” he asked in lowly before she crossed the threshold.

She shrugged. “Just a late-night workout. Same as you. And with that out of the way, I believe the sleep will come easier. You should head to bed too. Growing boys need their rest so they can get big and strong.”

Peter stared at the spot until he was sure he was alone. His mind was whirling.

Was this some kind of test? It certainly felt like it. But if it was, it brought on a question of whether he passed or not. He didn’t know which option he preferred.

A glint coming from underneath one of the bicycles caught his eye. Peter, pretending to tie his shoelace, picked up the object. A smile slowly spreading across his face at the sight of the forgotten black bobby pin. The hair stuck to it was long, too long, so that ruled out Black Widow as the owner. Peter doubted she would be careless enough to leave this lying here.

Finally something he could use.

He resumed the “tying” of the shoelaces when in reality, he slipped the pin into his shoe. He stood up and left.

Getting the bracelets open took him longer than he would like to admit, but prying small panels off with nothing but a bobby pin wasn’t the easiest task. But here he was, sitting on a bathroom floor, staring at the exposed mechanism. If he was correct, these parts were responsible for dampening his powers.

Peter positioned his wrists so they would be in line with the ends of the bobby pin. He had to do it correctly if he wanted to succeed. He didn’t even want to think about what would happen if he messed up.

It could shock him unconscious, release a lethal dose of the sedatives… the list went on.

Taking a steadying breath, he curled his hands into fists, and narrowed his eyes in concentration.

“Three, two… one.”

He brough his wrists together in one swift motion, stabbing the exposed areas at the same time. The bracelets let out a single spark of light each and thin trail of smoke.

“Well, that probably short-circuited something else too,” Peter muttered as he closed the exposed areas. You could spot the faint scratches on the sleek silver surface only if you looked for them. After he removed the pin from the soap and tucked it where, hopefully, nobody would find it, he returned to the living area. Had had mapped the field the camera could see, which allowed him to pick the blind spot big enough to test the results.

He placed his palms on the wall. “Here goes nothing,” he said and jumped.

He didn’t fall.

He didn’t fall!

Grin threatened to split his face in two. “Yes! Yes!” he quietly cheered. Wasting no more time, Peter climbed the rest of the way up and nestled himself into the corner. The familiar feeling was soothing him instantly. Well, it looked like he was about to get first full night of good sleep since he ended up at this place.

That was his last thought before he fell asleep, the corners of his lips quirked upwards.

“Friday, is the kid awake yet?” Tony asked from where he was pouring himself a cup of coffee. When Natasha came to him earlier and told him her night encounter, it actually put him in a good mood.

“I am unable to get my eyes on Peter.”

Tony’s smile froze. “Is he in a bathroom?” The kid didn’t get sick again, did he?

“Negative, Boss. He left the bathroom in early morning hours and then I lost sight of him.”

“Bracelets?”

“I am unable to detect the location from those.”

Tony’s heart skipped a beat at that. “Comb through the footage.” With heavy heart, he abandoned the coffee and headed to the kid’s room.

Kid, for both of our sake, but mostly for yours, I hope you didn’t run.

Peter woke up to a sound that sounded suspiciously like a wheeze. He let out disgruntles sigh and turned his head to look over his shoulder. To his surprise, he found Stark below him, his arms awkwardly in front of him.

“Why do you look like you’re about to have a heart attack?” he mumbled sleepily.

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe because you’re stuck to a ceiling?!”

The brief flash of confusion turned into understanding once he realized where he was. “Oh. Right.”

“Oh? Right?! That’s all you’re going to say about it?! You could’ve fallen!”

“Don’t worry, Mr. Stark.” Mr. Stark, huh? Now when did that happen? “I won’t fall.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I know,” Peter said, rolling his eyes. “My powers, remember?”

Wait-

Oh shit, his powers! Mr. Stark knew caught him. “I, uh…”

Smart, Parker. Really smart.

“Right,” Mr. Stark said slowly, “how about you come down?”

Shit, shit, shit- Peter did his best not to outwardly show his panic. He messed up big time. And when there was a mess-up, a punishment usually followed. What a pity. He went so long without one.

Peter could’ve jumped, but he wanted to savor those precious seconds before the pain came, so he started climbing down. Well, the least he could do was to face it like a champ. Like always.

No place for weaknesses.

“Hey, is everything all—"

New voice.

Peter froze still stuck to the wall. Mr. Stark whipped around. It seemed like the time in the room stopped as Wilson and Barnes’ eyes slid from Mr. Stark’s form to him.

Maybe if I don’t move, they won’t see me, Peter thought.

“I’m pretty sure he’s not supposed to do that,” Wilson said warily and to be fair, Peter couldn’t blame him. He did attack the man before.

Peter soundlessly lowered himself to the ground, the slight shift of the two newcomers’ bodies making Peter’s own tense in response. He will defend himself should he be attacked.

Mr. Stark stepped in front of him, shielding Peter from the view. “Everything’s fine,” he said. “Leave us. We’ll join you shortly.”

Wilson leaned to the side to catch a glimpse of Peter. The boy didn’t need to be a telepath to know what was going through the man’s head. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Go.”

The man looked like he wanted to protest, but Barnes’ hand on his shoulder stopped him. The former Hydra assassin nodded towards the door. Wilson, though reluctantly, relented. “Okay.”

Once the two were out of the sight, Mr. Stark turned to face Peter and took a step towards him. Here it comes. Peter lifted his head, his jaw clenched as he waited for the blow to land. Will it be a slap or punch? Will it be just his face that gets struck or his torso too? Will he get kicked once he’s on his knees?

Two arms sneaked around his body, one around his arms and one burying itself in his hair, made Peter turn into a statue. But no pain came. The touch was… gentle, actually. The hand in his hair began to cradle through his curls. It felt like someone pulled the plug and all of Peter’s tension went down the drain.

“I’m not mad,” Mr. Stark murmured into his hair, startling Peter and making him free himself from the hold before he could sink into it fully.

“What was that?”

Mr. Stark quirked one eyebrow. “Me saying I’m not mad or the hug?” When Peter didn’t reply, the curiosity turned into a small frown. “Did you ever get hugged?”

“Uh, yeah, yeah, plenty. All-all the time,” Peter rushed out, but the lie sounded fake to his own ears.

“Right, as I was saying, I’m not mad, but I have to ask – how did you disable it?”

Peter decided to take the risk and merely shrugged. He fully expected Mr. Stark to press further for the answers, but the man only nodded and said, “Okay. Now come on, breakfast is on the table.”

Peter could only blink after the man. Mr. Stark didn’t strike him. Mr. Stark didn’t strike him! Peter messed up, did something he shouldn’t have done… yet there was no beating. Not even after he refused to say how he disabled the bracelets. All those things would get him pretty beaten up back home, what the hell?

Safe, his mind whispered.

Peter mulled over the word. Safe. Yes, he was safe, wasn’t he? Mr. Stark stepped in front of him, shielding him with his own body. Mr. Stark hugged him.

Nobody could touch him if he was near Mr. Stark. Mr. Stark meant safety. Safety felt nice.

Peter decided he liked Mr. Stark.

The day was spent by the kid glued to the TV, watching one sci-fi movie after another. The rest of Star Wars saga, Alien, Back to the Future, Jurassic Park – it didn’t matter. It was like he tuned out the rest of the world, only acknowledging when someone joined him on the couch with brief glance. Tony couldn’t help the tiny smile at the sight of childish wonder in Peter’s eyes. With all of the training his parents had put him through, there was no doubt that the boy had any time to just… be a kid.

Tony decided not to do anything about the bracelets. That was another point he wanted to bring up – trust. And besides, if the kid wanted to run, he would have done that the moment he disabled the power dampener.

He made a note to clean and basically child-and-villain-proof his workshop. He wanted to see on what level the kid was despite never attending school. He had to have some knowledge if he was able to disable them.

The whole confrontation refused to leave his mind. Peter looked like a deer caught in a headlight once he realized he was sticking to the ceiling. Like he was expecting him to lash out.

The addition of Mr. and Miss in front of their names came as a pleasant shock. Well, except Steve. Steve was still called Call-Me-Steve. And to Steve’s annoyance, the rest of the team took on the nickname as well. Still, it helped to ease the atmosphere between Peter and the group.

The efforts seemed to start paying off, because the kid basically imprinted on Tony like a duckling, checking from time to time if Tony was nearby.

When Tony found Peter sleeping in the same corner the next day, he had a comfy hammock installed there. Though he thought the kid would appreciate it, it was also mostly for peace of Tony’s own mind.

And as it turned out, he was right. Peter’s whole face lit up once he spotted the little nest.

Tony’s heart flooded with warmth.

Tony craned his neck up. “You sure like that book, huh?”

Peter, sitting on a ceiling, glanced over the top before returning his gaze to the pages. “It’s alright.”

Over the days of interacting with their little charge, Tony believed he became fluent in the teen. He never expressed outward joy and Tony for some reason suspected that it was because of the kid’s fear of having the object of his joy taken away. That, or he didn’t know how to properly express what he was feeling, which Tony found relatable.

Another round of laughter came from the group huddled near the TV. The team had taken up watching the aforementioned PSAs, making their local fossil cover his face in embarrassment. Clint was bent over, holding his sides. “Aw, man, these are hilarious.”

“Play the one about reproduction. You can see Call-Me-Steve’s soul leave his body in that one,” Peter said without looking away from the page. Eventually, he looked, but not at the group. He looked at Bucky, who was only half-attempting to hide his staring. “Why are you staring at me so much?”

“I’m sorry,” he said softly.

Peter’s eyebrows knitted together. “Uh, okay? For what exactly?”

“For trying to kill you.”

“Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down? Many people tried to kill me. As you can see, they didn’t succeed.”

Bucky shifted, bowing his head slightly. “I tried… as a Winter Soldier, I was given the order to kill you shortly after you got your powers. I’m sorry.”

Aside from the rowdy group going crazy over the videos, everything was quiet in their little corner.

“Eh, it’s no big deal,” the kid said, making both men turn to him. “I don’t remember it at all, you obviously failed as I’m right here, so… no hard feelings on my side.”

“But I—”

“If you want to hear ‘I forgive you’ from me, then fine. I forgive you. You can cross my name off some list if you have one, but I literally couldn’t care less.”

Tony watched as Barnes’ shoulders fell in acceptance and mentally added him on a list of people that Peter started to slowly warm up to. First it was Natasha, then Rhodey and then Clint being, well, Clint, got jealous and practically started to buy the kid with chocolate. He puffed like a peacock when Peter told him ‘you’re not so bad’.

But Tony knew he was still number one and nobody could take it away from him.

His idle scrolling through SI documents that Pepper labeled as “important” got interrupted by an alert lighting up on his watch. Peter’s vitals were all over the place for the past five minutes.

Peter hadn’t moved from his spot on the ceiling, but it didn’t escape Tony how hunched over the book the kid was, wide eyes furiously going over the page and lips slightly parted. “Pete?” Nothing. “Kid?” Still no response. “Must be hell of a book,” he muttered under his breath.

A broom in the corner caught his attention. Shrugging, he grabbed it and then poked Peter’s side. The effect was instant. The kid yelped and if it wasn’t for his stickiness and quick reflexes, he would’ve fallen. “What the hell, Mr. Stark?” he cried out as he slightly swinged from side to side.

“Breathe!” Tony said, exasperated. “Or you’ll faceplant on the floor when you pass out.”

“You almost made me fall!”

Tony poked the kid’s ribs with the broom handle. “Well, what was I supposed to do? You didn’t react to anything else!”

“Well, maybe I acknowledged you with a hum but your old man ears didn’t catch that.”

Tony let out dramatic gasp. “You sassy little shit,” he said, flipped the broom over and began to playfully whack the boy with it. Peter giggled – actually giggled – and moved out of the broom’s reach. Tony gave chase, eliciting more giggles from the kid. “I’ll let you know that I’m not that old!”

“Whatever makes you feel better, old man,” the kid replied cheekily.

Tony huffed and shook his head. “Kids these days have no respect,” he grumbled. “Just breathe next time.” He went back to the documents, aware that Peter was following him to stay close.

And just when Tony thought that everything went well, of course it had to go to shit.

Tony heard the kid draw in shuddering breath, noticing that he made it through the book. But that wasn’t all that caught his attention. No, he tried and failed to decipher the emotions that rapidly flashed across Peter’s features. In one flash, Tony could’ve sworn that the kid was about to cry.

Just as fast as it appeared, it disappeared, Peter closed the book shut, jumped down, threw the book on the table and stormed from the room. Tony grabbed the book in hopes to find what had upset the kid since he enjoyed it so much. He flipped to the last page and he immediately understood.

“What was that about?” Rhodey asked.

“I’m going to get that girl from that bookstore fired,” he muttered angrily, passing the book to Sam’s waiting hands. Hope was apparently one of the themes; that was the reason Tony got it in the first place. “No wonder he’s upset with an ending like that!”

Sam passed the book to Natasha. “Well, it is a trilogy. If you wanted cliché happy ending, you should've gotten some standalone. Or different author.”

“Tony,” Steve said, “don’t—”

“What, Steve?” he snapped. “Don’t bother trying? Is that what you’re trying to say?”

“No.”

Tony stopped.

“I wanted to say that whatever went wrong this time, you’ll be able to fix it. You always do.” Tony stared, dumbfounded. Steve continued. “I had my doubts before, but after seeing you two earlier… I was wrong. Whatever you need, we’ll help.”

“Huh. Never would have thought that we would see eye to eye, but… thanks, Cap. I appreciate it,” Tony said, and he meant it. But now onto more pressing matter. “Okay, I’m gonna go talk to him, make sure the kid’s okay.”

“Wait!” Clint called out, making Tony stop. “A bit of advice from seasoned dad to a new dad – if you push a teenager to talk when he doesn’t want to, you’ll do more harm than good. You have to let him blow some steam off first. And until then,” he opened a vent hatch and pulled out a chocolate tablet from now not-so-secret stash, “here.”

Tony accepted the sweet treat. Clint must really want to help if he was willing to pass up on an opportunity to bribe the kid into liking him. “Thanks, Clint.”

He was almost out of the room when he turned around so fast it almost gave everyone a whiplash.

“Hold on… what do you mean a new dad?”

In the darkness of his room and in the comfort of his hammock, Peter made up his mind. He was running away. He didn’t know where exactly he would go since his parents most likely changed the locations, but he could go to some of their old hiding spots. Those places still had running water and provided safe cover from the weather. Food will be a trouble, but he could figure that part out once it came to that.

He glanced at the chocolate in his lap that Mr. Stark brought him earlier and then threw it into the hammock because he couldn’t reach that high up and Peter refused to come down. He set it aside and jumped down.

He’ll miss the taste.

He’ll miss the comfort of the hammock.

He’ll miss Mr. Sta-

Peter firmly cut himself off. No. He had to stop this before he got in far too deep. Because if he dared to hope that things could be better, it would simply get taken away from him anyway. Hope was fatal. Better to spare himself the pain.

Assuming that all doors were locked for the nigh, Peter found a stairwell and bean to climb up in a search for the roof. Then he could scale down the wall and leave all of this behind.

He found the door at last. With a sense of finality pooling in his stomach, he gripped the handle and pulled the door open.

Peter looked up and stopped.

It was a good thing that Tony wasn’t asleep when Friday alerted him that the kid was on the roof. He put on one of his old zip-up hoodies and headed to his destination, not knowing what to expect. Aside from the time in the gym, Peter never wandered the Compound at night.

He opened the door and whatever he was expecting, it definitely wasn’t a pair of feet hanging in front of his face. Ducking underneath them, it didn’t take long to find the rest of the teen. Peter was sprawled on his back above the door. “A bit late to be outside.”

“There are so many,” the kid whispered, pure awe in his voice.

Tony looked up at the inky sky littered with millions of tiny bright dots. “There sure are. Not a cloud in sight. Perfect time for stargazing,” he said as he leaned on the wall next to Peter’s legs. “You’ve… never seen the stars?”

“I never really left the city. You can’t see this there with all that light pollution. Plus, when we were doing night missions outside of the city, it was always on cloudy night for maximum cover.”

Yeah, that would make sense. Though Tony couldn’t help but feel queasy at the memories of being up there. It was enough to make his skin prickle.

“You’ve been to space, right? During the battle of New York.”

Dang, the kid had to bring it up. But he was talking with Tony willingly, so he wouldn’t let the chance go to waste. “Yeah. I was.”

“How was it?”

Terrifying. Traumatizing. Nightmare and panic attack inducing. “It was… big. Vast and dark.”

“I would like to see it one day.”

Tony huffed. “Let’s hope it will be under better circumstances.”

“Thank you for closing that portal. I don’t know what I would’ve done otherwise.”

“Wait, you were there?”

“Of course. Like every person in New York.” The kid paused, seemingly contemplating to elaborate. “I was outside when the invasion happened. I wasn’t fast enough to hide in the safehouse and those things cornered me. I fought but more and more kept coming… and then they all fell. The portal closed.”

Tony found himself sitting next to Peter. He pushed the memories away in order to focus on his young charge. “Wait, that was you?”

Peter glanced at him. “Huh?”

“There was a part of the city where we weren’t fighting, but we found a bunch of Chitauri that were incapacitated before the mothership was destroyed. That was you, wasn’t it?” But none of them were killed. That planted some serious doubt about Peter’s claims that he killed someone. Sure, he was way younger then, but child soldiers killed since very young age. Plus… “There were several civilians claiming that some enhanced human had saved them.”

The kid averted his gaze. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I just protected myself.”

Lies. Tony never thought he would be grateful for those. “Well then,” he said with small smile, “whoever saved those people is a hero.”

“I didn’t save anyone.”

“I didn’t say that.”

More silence. About half a minute passed before Peter sat up, still looking up at the sky. “Do you really think that I can change? Despite everything I’ve done?”

The vulnerability in those words made Tony’s heart ache. “You just have to have a little bit of hope.”

“Hope is fatal.”

“Is it though?”

Peter shrugged, then shivered.

“Are you cold?” Tony asked.

Peter wrapped his hands around himself and shook his head in amusement. “The spider part of me doesn’t exactly like the cold.”

Oh. Right. Spiders can’t thermoregulate. Tony immediately shrugged off his hoodie. “Here,” he said as he wrapped it around Peter’s shoulders.

With wide eyes, Peter pulled the hoodie tighter around himself. “I- I don’t think I’ll ever get used to this… or understand.”

“But you’ll learn.”

A brief hesitation. “But I’ll learn,” Peter repeated. “Thank you.”

Tony’s heart leaped with joy. A grin threatened to betray how he truly felt, but thankfully, he got saved by the kid’s stomach rumbling loudly. He laughed. “Hungry?”

“A little bit,” Peter muttered, his cheeks dusting pink. Another loud rumble could be heard. “Traitor,” he muttered, looking down pointedly.

Tony ruffled Peter’s hair. “Let’s get some food into you then. Nothing is better than the good old midnight raid of the fridge.”

They tinkered in comfortable silence in Mr. Stark’s workshop. If Peter counted correctly, tomorrow should be five-week anniversary of his capture. When he compared his current-self with his past-self, it was almost unbelievable how much has his attitude towards the heroes changed.

Where there used to be struggles and attacks and rude words, now there were group meals and playful banter. Peter still struggled with that one, but as Mr. Stark had said, he’ll learn.

And oh how Peter was willing to learn, especially in Mr. Stark’s workshop. So much technology in one place. It was a dream come true! Yes, he had restrictions because of his villain status, but he still made the most of what he was allowed.

Peter dared to say that he was… happy.

A sound of muffled explosion made his head snap up and not a second later an alarm started to blare. “What’s going on?”

Mr. Stark brought up a footage Peter couldn’t see. “We’re under attack. Don’t worry, just… stay here, okay?” he said, and with that, he was gone.

The tightness on Mr. Stark’s face, along with the churning of his stomach, gave Peter a pretty good tip on who was attacking. More explosions could be heard over the alarm. They were louder. Closer. Like they were on…

The roof.

Peter was torn. Why now? His own words echoed in his head.

“They’re just waiting for the right moment to strike.”

Dammit.

Mr. Stark told him to stay put. And he wanted to obey, he really did, but… the sound of the battle went on for too long.

Peter knew what he had to do.

With his features set with determination, he headed out of the lab, but not before slipping a metallic disc into his shoe. He willed his hand to stop shaking as he pushed the pulled the door to the roof open. Unsurprisingly, he was met with the sight of a battlefield. There were dents in the roof. Charred spots from where the explosion went off. Even some bloodstains.

“Peter?” he heard Mr. Stark say. “What are you doing here? I told you to stay put!”

Peter didn’t get the chance to reply. “Spider!” He knew that voice. That was his mother’s voice. “What are you waiting for? Come on!” Peter spotted her on something that resembled a helicopter. His father was piloting, but still shot small rockets at the heroes on the roof.

“Peter, don’t,” Mr. Stark pleaded, shooting from his wrist gauntlet.

Peter squeezed his eyes shut and gulped. Then he began to sprint across the roof towards his parents. Someone tackled him.

“Pete, kid, listen,” Mr. Stark said, “you don’t have to go with them. Remember what we were talking about? You can be better! Don’t throw everything away. Please,” he choked the last word out.

But he knew what he had to do. So, flipping the man easily off of his body, he took off running once again. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, not sure if it could be heard through the lump in his throat. Peter came to the edge of the roof and jumped. His hand clasped around his mother’s extended one.

“Now!” his mother yelled at the same time as their hands connected.

An electric blast went through the tower, rendering all electronic on the roof useless. Peter heard the clang of Rhodey’s metal suit as it hit the ground. Peter risked the glance over his shoulder at the people he left behind.

“Nice one, Richard!”

“You were great too, hun!”

As always, no praise for Peter. A sudden stabbing pain came from around his wrists. Peter set his lips into thin like. “I forgot about these,” he muttered.

Well, he guessed he deserved it.

Darkness swallowed him.

#marvel fanfiction #tony stark #peter parker #villain peter parker #irondad #spiderson

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thathawaiianchick · 5 years

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my wolfstar fic recc

29 of my favs, plus 2 comics :)

sorted from shortest to longest, series at the bottom

i like long fics, i like raising Harry AUs, i like Lay Low at Lupin’s fics, i like marauder era “we’re 70′s trash fics”, i like angst, but i also love “everybody lives”, kind of a mix of everything but seriously a lot of raising Harry AUs because it fills a need i guess

some super popular, some relative unknowns i think

all fics that characterize wolfstar for me :)

JKR has disappointed me supremely, but fan works will hold my love forever

part 2 because i forgot some

STANDALONES

1. A Day Like Any Other by dustmouth

(a comic, not really a fic, just hosted on AO3)

The one where Sirius keeps receiving unwanted mail, Remus drinks a lot of tea, Peter's out on a hot date, and James is offering unwanted make overs.

(Or the answer to the question of exactly how many cursed letters can you flush down the loo).

2. To Keep a Star by dustmouth

(a comic, not really a fic, just hosted on AO3)

Daily life in the Intergalactic Postal Service. Or the one where Sirius is a postal star and Remus lives on a spaceship.

3. in your bedroom, during the war by lupinely

There’s the bed, there’s the room, and there’s Remus. This, at least, Sirius knows for sure. (4Kish)

4. Home We’ll Go by appalachian_fireflies

"I can't, I don't know how," Remus stuttered as Molly dropped the infant into his arms, who immediately ceased crying and stared up at him with wide eyes.

"Nonsense," Molly said. "Be a dear and keep him from falling while I feed Ginny."

"Ba!" Ron giggled, and slapped Remus in the face.

Molly is the emergency contact for the Order when those listed can no longer be reached. Remus' life finds a different path. (10K)

5. A Store of Happiness by coyotesuspect

Harry spends the summer after his third year living with Sirius and Professor Lupin. (10K)

6. In The Bed by bigblackdog

Left to his own devices the summer after the prank, Sirius crafts an unusual gift to mend his relationship with Remus. (11K)

7. Vigil Strange I Kept by whitmans_kiss

Remus' lycanthropy has caused his body to seriously deteriorate over the years due to the constant stress of the transformations, and by his fifty-sixth birthday, it's certain that he won't live to finish out the year. However, a cure has recently been discovered - but what if the cure is just as bad as the disease? (11K)

8. Elucidation Practice by montparnasse

Christmas, 1978. Remus, wrestling with the mighty problems of gift-giving on a budget, contemplates life, love, London in winter, and falling off the edge of the world with Sirius Black. (21K)

9. On a Windswept Cliff by starfishstar

On the cliff top where the fearsome Lord Black once stalked, an outcast man meets a big black dog, and things are not as they seem.

Or: The Remus/Sirius gothic romance AU. (21K)

10. Lethe and Mnemosyne by montparnasse

Winter '79. Looking to get out from under the black-hole overhang of wartime, Sirius and Remus take off to play house on the Cornish moors. It goes downhill from there. (26K)

11. Purity by FelisA

Sirius resurrection fic. (27K) 12. Common Woodbrown by imochan

Look well into thyself; there is a source of strength which will always spring up if thou wilt always look there. In 1985, Remus Lupin realizes that Sirius Black is innocent. Now, he just has to prove it. (36K)

13. Wilde and Whimsy by chasing bluefish, obsob

In a world where Dumbledore defeated Voldemort during the first war, the wizarding community is picking up the pieces and getting back to their lives. Remus Lupin becomes a person of interest in a murder at the bookshop where he works and Sirius Black and James Potter, aurors, are sent to investigate. As they navigate the crime itself, Remus and Sirius realize that there is something to their instant chemistry. But they need to keep their newfound attraction under wraps while trying to find the killer and stop them from claiming more victims. (36K)

14. Paper Wings by Krislaughs

(not hosted on ao3)

What if Sirius Black sent a final message from Azkaban? Enter the home of the last Marauder in the days following Voldemort’s downfall. Lost and alone, Remus asks a question of the void, a question whose answer will send him around the world. Meeting puppies, Kneazles, dementors, and nomads, Remus learns more about himself and his friends than he ever thought possible. Learn the secrets of the Marauder’s map and the world’s best chocolate, how various Death Eaters occupied themselves after the fall of their lord, and why you should never leave Remembralls lying around.

15. Uncreated Night by earlybloomingparentheses

Remus can drift through whole worlds in his own mind. Sirius lives in his body, electric, ablaze. In 1979 and 1996 and 1978 and 1981 and in many other years and many different places, they search for the bridges between them and the spaces they can share. Time after time, they fight their way back together, head and heart, mind and body.

And in 1998, Remus stands before the veil, wondering if he should finally stop thinking, and just act. (41.5K)

16. Lemon Chiffon Yellow by Spklvr

An unplanned night between Remus and Tonks ends up changing their lives forever. (42K)

17. The Weather Inside by earlybloomingparentheses

Sirius rides a flying motorbike, and snogs strangers in pubs, and strikes moody poses Remus finds irritatingly attractive. But for Remus, who drinks milky tea and wears flannel pyjamas, there's a chasm cracked right down the fault line between wanting and doing.

How he wants, though. How he wants. (43K)

18. the dogfather by hollimichele

“I’m not a reverse werewolf either,” says the man. “I’m your godfather.” (47K)

19. Domestic Creatures by veeagainst

Growing up is hard to do -- but the journey is better if you take someone with you. (53K)

20. Leave the Children Behind by montparnasse

Bravery, sometimes, is the ending just as much as the beginning. Remus, Sirius, and a series of choices.

Or, a love story—backwards and forwards. (54K)

21. A Series of Sketches Done in Black Ink by mustntgetmy

Non-magic AU. Sirius had always imagined the aftermath of falling in love would mean lightness, and an escape from all the horrors of his childhood. But the past never leaves, and even love can't stop bad memories from resurfacing.

An almost year in the life of Sirius and Remus's first year as a couple replete with art and tangled sheets, and containing the following: filled sketchbook pages from people lost and people found, terrible biscuits from an excellent therapist, mismatched music records, expensive hot chocolate, a lost brother, photographs (some invasive and some invoking terrible memories), a reckoning with the past, a promise of the future, and yet another ridiculously over the top Halloween party. (57K)

22. Alt Ed by NachoDiablo

“Remus? Who the bloody hell is Remus?” James is scrambling to straighten his chair as McGonagall glares at him from the head table.

Mary smiles innocently. “Oh, just a new friend that Lily met over the holidays. He’s homeschooled, just moved into her neighborhood it seems. She says he’s very clever. And I hear he’s quite fit, as well.”

AU where Remus and Lily become friends outside of Hogwarts, setting James and Sirius on a quest to learn more about this mysterious newcomer. (61K)

23. Indiana Lupin and the Search for the Conqueror by nekarose

Remus Lupin is an undercover archaeologist for the British Museum and is sent to Greenland to investigate a Roman shipwreck. In Greenland he meets Sirius Black, makes a real discovery and soon enough the two of them are racing through the world in search of the remains of the Library of Alexandria with Remus’ arch-enemy right at their heels. (66K)

24. Le Mot Vagabond by ironicallyinternational

(It all starts with Peter Pettigrew dying twice.

First, Peter kills Wormtail (discreetly), and then Sirius kills him (less discreetly).

Losing a friend is never easy, even amidst the ravages of war, but losing the last of your childhood alongside him is far worse.)

War is a complicated, messy thing. The Marauders have their fucked up shit to deal with, but they also have each other, and that counts for a lot. (151K)

SERIES:

25. The Hole in the Ground by sostrata

(5 works) A series of fics about Sirius and Remus raising Harry in their home, The Hole in the Ground. (18k)

26. Holding Out by bigblackbog

(works 2)

On Halloween, 1981 Sirius and Remus abscond with Harry despite their recently rocky relationship. (36K)

27. Maddest House by busaikko

(6 works)

old as hell. Another wolfstar raising Harry fic (55K)

28. Lycanthropic Studies by Eiiri

(3 works)

After the Battle of Hogwarts, Remus recognizes something familiar in Draco Malfoy and offers him sanctuary. With nowhere else to turn--his parents in prison, his home a crime scene--Draco reluctantly accepts and becomes a tolerated, if not welcome, member of his schoolyard rivals' and wartime adversaries' family of choice. As pages of the lunar calendar turn and the summer wears on,Draco and the others begin to see each other in a different light. (139K)

29. Stealing Harryverse by copperbadge

(works 12)

On a dark night long ago, Sirius Black took a wrong turn and never found Peter Pettigrew. Instead of Azkaban, Sirius settled down in Little Whinging to keep an eye on his godson, and hired Remus Lupin to run his bookshop for him. Then one day when Harry was eight, Sirius found out how the Dursleys treated him, and stole him away.

Stealing Harry is an alternate universe version of Harry Potter's life before his time at Hogwarts. It is the story of Harry's family: Sirius and Remus, Ted and Andromeda, Nymphadora, Neville Longbottom, and even Severus Snape, all banded together against a newly powerful Peter Pettigrew who is still searching for a way to resurrect Voldemort.

Laocoon's Children follows Harry through his time at Hogwarts as he develops a very different group of friends: Hufflepuff Draco Malfoy, Ravenclaw Padma Patil, and Gryffindor Neville Longbottom, strange companions for a Harry who was sorted into Slytherin -- the house of his beloved Professor Snape.

This universe ends in Harry's third year, and is partially incomplete. As it is not likely to be finished, the last story in the series is a group of notes I made on where the story would have gone and how it would have ended. (443.3K)

30. All the Young Dudes by MsKingBean89

(4 works)

LONG fic charting the marauders' time at Hogwarts (and beyond) from Remus' PoV - diversion from canon in that Remus's father died and he was raised in a children's home, and is a bit rough around the edges. Otherwise canon-compliant. 1971 - 1995 (557K)

31. Crow Rides A Pale Horse by tb_ll57

(4 works)

The note pinned to his collar read 'Harry J Potter - please accept'. The Dursleys had left him with nothing else but a pillow sack with half a sleeve of McVities biscuits, a mealy apple, and ten pounds. (618K)

#hp #harry potter #wolfstar #remus lupin #sirius black #killing sirius was not punk rock jk rowling #nor was killing off remus #this is the barest reason to want to kick jkr #reference for myself #i dont have all of these bookmarked on ao3 even if they're some of my favs #raising harry #fic rec #this only took me an hour to make i can't believe i've been procrastinating this #lolol yes i can #i can believe

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itsthegameilike · 4 years

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Just some fic recs (part 2)...

It’s been a while since I’ve made a rec list and that seemed tragic to me as I’ve spent most of my quarantine surviving off fic. So here we go! The popular fics are hidden away for today and there is more Wangxian on here than I’d care to admit, but I Hyperfixated. Still, the ships are numerous and various.

Promises We Make -- Mayarene Rose; Wangxian Lan Zhan has taken to visiting the Yiling as often as he can, bringing as many rabbits as he can carry. It is not against the sect rules so there's no reason for him to feel guilty about it. And after all, he made a promise. Or the one where Lan Zhan sneakily moves into the Burial Mounds and this may or may not have helped stop a lot of bad things from happening. **If you’re feeling sad, this is the fic for you. It can take any bad day and make it better. Lan Zhan brings every goddamn rabbit in Cloud Recesses to the Burial Mounds a few rabbits at a time just as an excuse to visit Wei Ying. Then he kind of just stays? And everyone loves him? And Wei Ying is an absolute dumbass about the whole thing? Which tracks.

Screw Poetry, It’s You I Want -- intertwiningsouls; Pynch Adam tries to navigate a crush on his best friend, his first time having a group of friends during the holidays, and the mysterious notes that keep showing up in his locker. **Fair warning this fic is not finished and on hiatus, but I still think it is absolutely worth reading anyway. I reread it often and then get sad it’s not updated, but, you know, fic writer’s lives are hard. I know this deeply. Anyway, it’s soft, it’s cute, and Ronan is perfect.

apastron -- kissmesexybatman; Shatt "This was the mission: three people were set to travel half a year out to the edge of the solar system, traversing space no human eyes had ever seen, to explore the possibility of life in the most extreme of conditions." The first six months of the Kerberos Mission. **This fic is quiet and meditative and a little lonely, but it is so, so beautiful. I loved it the first time I read it and I love it now. There’s some very good ace representation and love just pours from this fic. Love for people and love for space.

How Fragile We Are, Between the Few Good Moments -- nineandthreequarterrs; Wolfstar By the time it’s dark, there’s a fire crackling before them. The tent is set up. There are two chairs propped up by the fire. They have cooked and eaten dinner, and they are sitting in silence. It reminds Sirius of the dinners at home after he got sorted into Gryffindor, or after his mother found the letters from his friends, or lately, whenever he dares to show his face around the house at all. What lives in that space isn’t actually silence. Silence is absence. This thing that hangs between him and his mother, now between him and Remus, is the presence of something suffocating and cutting. It doesn’t serve as a placeholder for noise, it serves as a punishment. It cleaves him to the bone, flays him until he wants to cry. The soft, knotting feeling in his chest he feels when he wants to let tears out but can’t is rising in him. Sirius doesn’t know how to kill except to hiss, “Well if you’re mad at me just fucking say so.” **This takes the moment where Sirius lures Snape to the Shrieking Shack and nearly gets him killed by Remus in his werewolf form-a scene that should be utilized like this more frequently-and creates something absolutely lovely with it. The fic is quiet and subtle and deals with the abuse Sirius suffers and Remus’ rightful anger in a delicate and true way. I adore it.

Likewise Variable -- ssstrychnine; Wolfstar James has plans, Peter is the nurse, Sirius keeps fake blood up his sleeves, and Remus just tries to stay alive. **One of those classic Marauders fics where everyone is batshit crazy except Remus, who ends up doing batshit crazy things because he loves his friends. And Sirius. Especially Sirius. He ends up playing Romeo and Sirius plays Juliet and the pining and angst is unreal. A trope I’m trash for and very well executed.

flowers boldly blossoming over withered grass -- LilyMaxwell; Wangxian It’s in the dawning years after Jin Guangyao’s death that Wei Wuxian learns what it’s like to live and love without a second thought. **The first fic I found in my endless search through pages and pages on ao3 where I saw a characterization of Lan Zhan that resonated with me in the same way he did in the show. I have a thing for soft and quiet fics and this one is no exception. Lovely and beautifully written.

Like Knives -- All_My_Characters_Are_Dead; Bakushima Bakugou was disappointed in him. Bakugou thought he was weak, thought he was useless. Bakugou knew he’d broken, and Bakugou was mad at him for it. **I love this fic a lot. It takes Bakugou’s anger and uses it to full angst advantage. Kirishima overhears Bakugou and misinterprets Bakugou’s intense worry for anger. And then emotions happen.

Garden War -- Cibee; Drarry Harry and Draco are quarantined in their houses, a lake across from one another. What better ways to spend this time than to annoy each other with letters and attempts to prove that their garden is better? **I did my best to avoid quarantine fics, but you know, easier said than done. This one is super cute. Mostly epistolary, Harry and Draco just make fun of each other and garden and then get together. Like, what the hell else do you want?

light fires at night (to push back the void) -- inthesea; Andreil The first time Andrew realizes he wants to hear the words, Neil isn’t even doing anything. He’s just sitting there, staring at the horizon with that stupidly dramatic faraway expression of his, and letting the cigarette burn down between his fingers all the way to the filter — an outrageous waste of good nicotine, if you asked Andrew. (Or: 20+ times Andrew and Neil say I love you, and one time they say it out loud.) **One of the two truly popular fics that shows up on here. This fic changed my life. It killed me and then brought me back to life. It’s essentially a series of vignettes starring Andrew and Neil and like...it hurts and it heals and it loves. I would die for this fic to continue existing even when I don’t.

the hidden source is the watchful heart -- sombregods; Wangxian Wei Wuxian comes back to the Cloud Recesses for the winter months. He and Lan Wangji learn that emotional intimacy and physical intimacy are not (yet) quite synonymous.They have time to figure it out. **I have the biggest soft spot for relationships where sex and romance aren’t intrinsically intertwined and take some time to navigate. And in my mind, Lan Zhan and Wei Ying have exactly that kind of relationship, so this fic was all I ever needed. If that’s your thing, this is a must read.

A Heart’s a Heavy Burden -- idratherhaveyou; Wangxian There was fire and magic and death, screams and blood, but rage was Wei Ying's song at night, the beast he became taking control, protecting what it could and destroying those that did harm.Years ago, when Wei Ying had newly discovered this particular power of his, when he’d picked his side—to simply fight everyone who didn’t fight for those weaker than themselves—he’d remembered more.To him, this was better. Better to forget things best forgot. **A Howl’s Moving Castle AU **A shameless self-promotion, but I love this fic to pieces, so I thought it seemed fit to add. Not quite finished, but I promise it will be. I just take two of my favorite pieces of media and have a real good time. There’s magic, Lan Zhan and Wei Ying love each other a lot, and A-Yuan does god’s work.

Siren Song -- Becky_J_1022 When Damen is cursed by a Siren in exchange for the revenge his heart desperately desires, his life is thrown into chaos, and betrayal lurks around every corner. Despite his better judgment, he allows a beautiful young man to seek berth on his ship, not knowing that he has granted refuge to the one man who has every reason to want him dead. Laurent may be the key to breaking Damen's curse, and Damen could help restore Laurent to his throne—but if they have any hope of helping each other, they will have to untangle their bitter pasts first. **Listen, man, this fic is balls to the walls fun and also everyone should read Becky’s fics. Not enough people do. She makes sentences beautiful. Just so beautiful. And she loves to and you can tell.

#fic recs #the untamed #wangxian #andreil #tfc #wolfstar #drarry #harry potter #bnha #bakushima #trc #pynch #voltron #shatt #writers are wonderful creatures #i love and cherish you all #thanks for you work

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tomeandflickcorner · 4 years

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Episode Review- The Real Ghostbusters: Janine Melnitz, Ghostbuster

Awesome! We got a Janine centric episode! And it really gives her a chance to shine!

There’s apparently been a huge spike in paranormal activity within the city, and the Ghostbusters are struggling to keep up with their mounting workload. Each day, they have to head out to take on a number of busts and when they come back, they’re greeted with a pile of new additions to their worksheet. Needless to say, they’re really exhausted. Peter asks Egon what could be causing this rising amount of ghosts appearing in the city, but Egon doesn’t have any answers. And when he takes out his PKE Meter, it immediately overloads, further illustrating how serious things are.

When Winston and Ray head down to the basement to unload the new batch of captured ghosts into the Containment Unit, with Ray saying they’ll have to add another Klein Bottle to the machine to prevent it from going over max capacity, Janine approaches Egon and Peter. She basically says ‘hey, I know you guys are super busy and all, but my apartment is haunted. Can you please do something about that?’ But Peter and Egon tell her they can’t address her problem until after they resolve the supernatural crisis. And yeah, I can see both sides of the issue here. Janine is clearly not the only one dealing with a ghost problem right now, and it probably should be an issue of first come, first served. Otherwise, it wouldn’t be fair to everyone else. At the same time, Janine is on the Ghostbusters’ payroll, too. You’d think there would be some sort of office perk to that.

Anyway, Janine ends up returning to her apartment after clocking out for the day. When she arrives, she is aggravated to discover that the ghosts haunting her apartment have moved all of her furniture up onto the ceiling. In frustration, she yells at the ghosts to get out, but the ghosts all just laugh. Though they do unstick all her furniture, which all falls to the ground, forcing poor Janine to put everything back in place. The next morning, Janine wakes up to find her bed is floating in midair. And when she gets into the shower, no water comes out of the showerhead. Instead, the shower quickly fills up with frogs. As one might expect, this is the final straw for Janine. So when she returns to the Firehouse, she is fully prepared to demand the Ghostbusters help her out. But when she arrives, she is greeted only by Slimer, who informs her the Ghostbusters had already headed out to deal with other calls. So Janine decides to take matters into her own hands, borrowing one of Peter’s spare uniforms and taking an extra Proton Pack and Ghost Trap. She returns to her apartment to catch the ghosts herself, with Slimer tagging along. When they get there, the apartment seems to be deserted. And for a brief moment, Janine wonders if the ghosts had simply gotten bored and left on their own. But then the lights suddenly turn off, and the ghosts begin throwing random objects at Janine while Slimer hides in a nearby cabinet. (Janine is particularly angry that a vase her mother had given her gets smashed against the wall.) Despite Janine’s best efforts, the ghosts quickly get the better of her, wrapping her up in a blanket and taking away the Proton Pack she was carrying. Fortunately, Slimer eventually decided to quit cowering in the corner and actually help out. While the other ghosts were distracted in tormenting Janine, Slimer carefully pushed the discarded Ghost Trap into position and triggered it, making sure to hold onto a fixed object in order to keep himself from being pulled into the trap as well. So the ghosts haunting Janine’s apartment are soon trapped. And Janine thanks Slimer for coming to her rescue.

Meanwhile, the Ghostbusters were still hard at work catching all the other ghosts plaguing the city. Including a group of thug-like ghosts who were actually wielding real guns. I have no idea why I found this so hilariously shocking. After all, it’s not the first time we’ve seen guns depicted in this show. Maybe it’s the fact that the guns are being held by these small ghosts as if it was no big deal. Sometimes I forget that the 80s were a different time. Anyway, as the Ghostbusters start to head off to their next assignment, Winston remarks how the last time ghosts were crawling out of the woodwork like this, it was when Gozer was around. Peter briefly wonders if it was possible that Gozer was somehow coming back, but Egon says this wasn’t the case, as none of the readings suggest such a thing. However, he does take note that the ghosts they’ve been catching all have a common spectrography. Which suggests that there’s a single source for all the ghostly activity. Unfortunately, there’s too much spectral static for him to pinpoint the exact location of that singular source. Peter tries to put a positive spin on things by reminding his teammates of how much money they’re making. Winston counters this silver lining by reminding Peter that they’ve been too busy to make much use of that extra money.

As the Ghostbusters head off to Gracie Manor, which is being haunted by a Class 9 Free Roaming Vapor, that statue of Atlas at Rockefeller Center suddenly comes to life, scaring off all the ice skaters in the process. (So I’m guessing this episode takes place during the winter months.) The Atlas Statue ends up throwing the globe it was carrying, which just narrowly misses the Ecto-1 as it drives by. The Ghostbusters try to shoot the Atlas Statue with their Proton Packs, but it proves to be completely ineffective, since the stature was infused with so much ectonic energy, it could resist the force of the Proton Streams. So the Ghostbusters have no choice but to run. They try to get creative and slow the Atlas Statue down by using the Proton Packs to melt the ice beneath it as the Atlas Statue sets foot onto the ice skating rink, but this doesn’t work as the Atlas Statue is able to jump back out of the hole in the ice. The Atlas Statue then fires of a beam of light emanating from its finger at the Ghostbusters. In a flash of light, the Ghostbusters all vanish from sight, much to the shocked dismay of the onlookers and news reporters.

Elsewhere, Janine and Slimer return to the Firehose after capturing the ghosts that had been haunting Janine’s apartment. When they see the Ghostbusters haven’t retuned yet, they decide to wait for them to get back. As they wait, Janine pulls out a TV set. This results in her seeing the news report announcing that the Ghostbusters disappeared while fighting the Atlas Statue. So Janine and Slimer hurry back out to try and figure out what happened to the Ghostbusters. When they arrive at Rockefeller Center, Janine pulls out the PKE Meter she’d brought with her, but quickly admits to Slimer that she has no idea what she’s doing. She can’t even properly analyze the readings on the PKE Meter.

Janine and Slimer begin to wander along the city streets, at a loss as to what to do. But that’s when Janine realizes something. Remembering how the Ghostbusters seemed to disappear as if they got pulled into a Ghost Trap, she gets the idea of getting information from some of the ghosts that have recently been caught. After all, maybe they might know what happened to the Ghostbusters. While she admits it’s a long shot, it’s the only possible lead they have. Of course, Janine can’t enter into the Containment Unit herself as she’s alive. (And she probably can’t use that special suit Egon used to enter into the Containment Unit back in X-Mas Marks the Spot as I imagine she’d need someone who knew what they were doing manning the control panel.) So she recruits Slimer to go into the Containment Unit instead. Slimer is not exactly on board with the idea, but Janine doesn’t give him much of a choice. Upon being put inside the Containment Unit, Slimer wanders around for a bit before he manages to locate the Thug Ghosts that the Ghostbusters had recently caught. Slimer eavesdrops on their conversation, overhearing them gloating how they won’t be there for long as Proteus will see that they’re released soon enough. And that Proteus already has the Ghostbusters in the Erie.

Okay, hold on a minute here. First off, how do these Thug Ghosts know what happened to the Ghostbusters? From what we saw, these ghosts were captured before the Ghostbusters encountered the Atlas Statue. How would the ghosts in the Containment Unit know what’s going on in the outside world? And come to think of it, when did the Thug Ghosts get put into the Containment Unit in the first place? They were just captured earlier this very same day. Did the Ghostbusters swing by the Firehouse between capturing the Thug Ghosts and starting to head off to Gracie Mansion? Because I didn’t get the impression they had the time to do that. Talk about a plot hole.

Getting back to the episode, Slimer’s presence is discovered before he can get the chance to hear anything more, so he has to make a run for it when the captured ghosts begin chasing after him. Slimer manages to make it safely back to the entrance/exit port of the Containment Unit, and Janine is able to pull him out in the nick of time while preventing any other ghost from escaping. Now that she’s armed with the information Slimer was able to gather up, Janine does some research and locates the only Erie building listed in Manhattan. After making a remark about how there’s never any thirteenth floor listed on the elevator buttons due to how superstitious people can be, Janine ventures up to the top floor of the building. But she notices the PKE Meter is going off as they pass by the 14th floor. As a result, Janine is able to discover this building has an unmarked 13th floor, and she is able to reach it by hitting the emergency stop button and blasting the elevator doors open. She finds herself in some sort of other-worldly office building, complete with a demonic receptionist. After brushing past the Demon Receptionist, Janine forces her way through a large doorway, ending up in a room that appears to be filled with mirrors. These mirrors are soon revealed to be some sort of prison cells, with the Ghostbusters all imprisoned within one of the mirrors. Which gives Janine the opportunity to make a Lewis Carol joke. Egon instructs Janine to get out of there since she doesn’t know what she’s up against. Ray backs up Egon’s statement by explaining that Proteus was a primal god like Gozer.

At that moment, Proteus himself appears. And he somehow knows Janine’s name. (Yeah, I suppose he might have overheard the Ghostbusters calling her Janine, but that doesn’t explain how Proteus knew her full name.) Janine attempts to shoot Proteus with the Proton Pack, but to no avail as Proteus is much too strong. Slimer, showing some courage, ends up charging at Proteus and keeping him distracted. While Slimer is distracting Proteus, Janine turns and fires at the mirror prison holding the Ghostbusters captive. This not only results in the mirror breaking, freeing the Ghostbusters in the process, but the light reflecting off the mirror surface apparently momentarily blinds Proteus. The blinded Proteus ended up firing off one of his finger beams randomly, with the finger beam bouncing off the other mirrors. This resulted in the finger beam overloading, causing the place to begin to fall apart. Thankfully, the Ghostbusters, Janine and Slimer are able to make it out of there safely before the 13th floor blows up, clearly taking Proteus out in the process.

Upon returning to the Firehouse, Egon remarks that Janine showed real bravery to come after them like that. The other Ghostbusters then notice the phones are no longer ringing off the hook, and Ray concludes that, with Proteus gone, the paranormal activity in New York will probably return to normal. Peter then tells Janine that she’s pretty handy with a Proton Pack, so Janine suggests that she should try to go into business for herself. Peter offers an alternative suggestion- she stay on as their secretary, but with a raise in salary. Janine accepts this, on the condition that they continue to make sure her apartment remains ghost-free. With the exception of Slimer, of course.

As someone who likes Janine as a character, this was one episode I’d recommend to anyone who was interested in giving the show a chance. Obviously, Janine doesn’t have the experience and knowledge that the actual Ghostbusters have, but she still is able to hold her own when the situation calls for it. She even managed to defeat Proteus, a literal god. Sure, Slimer did help keep Proteus distracted for a little while there, so she didn’t do it alone. But the fact remains that Proteus was defeated because of Janine. And she also helped save the Ghostbusters in the process. That’s not just an impressive feat for a secretary with no real Ghostbuster training, it’s impressive for anyone. Though I do find it a bit strange that Peter seemed surprised how good Janine was with a Proton Pack, as this isn’t the first time she’d wielded one. Even if you don’t include that time in Mr. Sandman, Dream Me a Dream (since that was technically Dream Janine), she did get the chance to wield a Proton Pack in Janine’s Genie.

There’s one other thing I want to comment on for this episode. In the opening scene, we can see the Ghostbusters heading out to what I think was either a library or a bookstore. I couldn’t tell which. But the ghosts they were catching were clearly Captain Ahab, the Frankenstein Monster and one other ghost that was apparently supposed to be Mr. Hyde, though I didn’t get a good enough look at him to properly identify him. I wanna know the story behind this haunting! Are they suggesting these characters were actual people, the way Ebenezer Scrooge was shown as an actual person in X-Mas Marks the Spot? Or were the ghosts haunting that location simply taking up the form of famous literary characters? Because that would have made for an interesting episode. Especially since it could have potentially gotten kids watching the show interested enough to actually read the actual novels, the way the movie Pagemaster was trying to do. (Although, I’ve been told that with the book Moby Dick, every other chapter in that novel takes a break from the actual narrative to discuss the whole history of whaling. I imagine kids might get bored rather quickly if they tried to read that one.)

(Click here for more Ghostbusters reviews)

#the real ghostbusters #rgb episode review #ghostbusters franchise

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unsettledink · 4 years

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Back in the days of LJ, I used to try and do a post at the end of each year, looking back primarily at fandom and fic. I fell out of the habit when everything moved to tumblr, and then it seemed like I didn’t have anything to say since I wasn’t writing or really participating any.

But I always liked the idea of it, because I love to be overly reflective on stuff. And talk about my fic. Any excuse! I shuffled around some of the topics I used back then and added a few I’ve seen around that I liked. It got… long, because I TALK, so I split into two sections.

Your main fandom of the year?

Marvel (MCU) for sure. Primarily with characters from Spider-Man and Iron Man movies.

Your favorite film watched this year?

The Old Guard - I saw a couple trailers and everything about it looked like catnip. ‘It’s probably going to be so dumb, but I don’t even care,’ I thought. And then it was so good. It was so much fun and so much smarter than I expected and I loved each and every character and it just made me happy in so many ways.

Your favorite book read this year?

Red, White, and Royal Blue, Casey McQuiston - I read it twice this year actually. It’s so… cute isn’t the right world. Sweet and hopeful and soft and comforting and intense. I liked every single character which is pretty rare. I cried during the sad parts and then again at the happy ending, like straight up sobbed - both times. I already want to read it again.

Your favorite tv show watched this year?

Schitt’s Creek - I started it on a whim and because a lot of people had said it was good. The episodes were short so it wasn’t a huge time investment. The first season was a little rough, but there were enough funny moments that I hung on, and then… I kept getting fonder and fonder of these idiots as they grew. And THEN… it kept not disappointing me?

You grow to expect certain scripts, twists, jokes, especially in queer story lines. To wait for the bad thing to happen, because it always does. Instead, Schitt’s Creek kept going, ‘hey, here’s the set up for that! Guess what? We’re not doing it. Here’s the happy version instead.’ The relief of having that happen again and again - the last season I’ve watched (I’m sort of saving 6) I cried a bunch but it was always because I was happy.

Your favorite album or song to listen to this year?

1896 - I’ve been waiting for the new Steam Powered Giraffe album so eagerly for aaaaaages. Finally getting recordings of Zero’s songs! Lying Awake remains my favorite off the album, with Eat Your Heart and Bad Days on the Horizon high up there as well. I’m loving what Zero brings to the band.

Your best new fandom discovery of the year?

I don’t know if I really did discover that much? I stuck pretty closely to old fandoms and the ones I picked up in 2019. Maybe Zodiac? It was definitely inspiring, and I want to write and read more in it.

Maybe the couple discords I joined? I still really dislike discord and am not on there much, and mostly lurk when I am, but having somewhere vaguely like the comms I remember makes me feel a little less isolated. It’s the potential, that maybe if I said something I might make a friend, or someone might actually want to hear what I say.

Your biggest fandom disappointment of the year?

The Watch - I mean, I knew it was going to be a disaster with every word said during pre production. I wasn’t ever going to be happy with it. And then it came out and was even worse and uglier and … disrespectful not just of the source material but of actual people connected to Terry. I’m beyond disappointed that this is what we got, and it’s probably going to be a long time before we get anything else.

Devil All the Time was terrible, but I didn’t have especially high hopes. It still didn’t manage to meet them. Yikes.

The most missed of your old fandoms?

Maybe MASH? Someone I follow started talking about it and I was reminded all over again of the wonderful fics in that fandom. I went looking and a lot are gone (still on my computer, lol, but not online), but rereading was such a trip. A slightly depressing trip, but still.

The fandom you haven't tried yet, but want to?

Hmm. I’ve kind of not had the energy to invest in other fandoms at the moment? When The Witcher was having it’s big moment back in January, I had a feeling I might enjoy it enough to fall headfirst into the fandom, so I avoided watching it. Ikr? I don’t have the time or the energy to actively seek anything out.

Your biggest fan anticipations for the New Year?

SO EXCITED about Winter’s Orbit. I mean, the third Spider-Man movie for sure, with worry. The second Venom movie, ugh yes. I have tentative hopes for Jungle Cruise? Jumanji was stellar and I always enjoy Dwayne. I have both hope and dread for the new Suicide Squad - I did love Birds of Prey, so if it’s along those lines, yay. The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard because it should be some fun garbage, my favorite kind. I don’t know how I feel about Dune, but, uh, I’m anticipating it. It seems highly unlikely it will actually happen, but The Wheel of Time TV series.

I want to be excited about Black Widow but it’s hard. It’s not the story I’ve been wanting to see, and I’m angry about Natasha not getting a movie until she’s dead.

You know. If any of it is released for real.

The Good:

I moved to a better place. I got a better paying, better benefits, better environment job that lets me work from home. The house acquired 3-7 more cats depending on the month. I was able to get some serious problems on my car fixed. I have insurance and was able to start on some health stuff. No one I know got sick or died. I wrote a LOT.

The Bad:

Aside from the obvious? Depression hitting extra hard during the winter. Having to put two kittens to sleep. Have my car be hit three times in our parking lot. Being driven INSANE by one of the cats for months while the vets were all closed. Kidney stone. Dealing with several health problems. Stalling for months on Gotcha.

The Indifferent:

Not leaving the house often or easily. Enjoying a new fandom but not doing great at making connections (still real awkward, bud). Raising kittens and saying goodbye. Need new tires. Reading a lot of fic but not a lot of books. Having more pay but more expenses as well (wth insurance??).

2020 fic stats

Number of stories: 39

Number of fandoms: 6? Or 2, if you cluster the others under mcu

Total number of words: 152049

Average word count per story: 4kish

Longest fic: Causality (18k, P/Q)

Shortest fic: Can’t, Won’t (1k, P/Q)

Most comments received: Sieche (49, T/P)

Fandom you wrote the most of: MCU Spider-Man - I only wrote TWO fics that didn’t feature that fandom, wow. And one of those was still MCU.

Fandom you wrote the least of: Zodiac (1!)

Events you participated in: Marvel Trumps Hate, Kinktober, IornspidersGeorg Exchange, Starker Festivals Exchange, MCU Secret Santa, Spiderio Big Bang

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you'd predicted?

SO MUCH MORE OMG. I mean, even just counting posted stuff! (I probably wrote a solid 300k of Gotcha this year.) I did not expect or plan on doing Kinktober, so that’s a whole 31 fics right there. I also wasn’t planning on doing any exchanges - I have a History - but then I did three? And beyond that, I did not expect for everything to get so LONG.

Topic you wrote that you would never have predicted in January:

Tony/Quentin. Goddammit @the-me09 They were like hey, they could be interesting! And while I agreed, I had no ideas for them. THEN they had to go and write Just Bodies That Collide and next thing I know, I’ve got ten fics featuring them and two-six series focused on them or Peter/Quentin/Tony. What the fuck.

Leitmotif of the year:

Vulnerability, I think. I had a bunch of things typed up and they all circle back to vulnerability in the end; sex, being seen, being wanted, sharing trauma, asking for help, trying something new. Offering a soft spot in the hopes it won’t be hurt.

Favorite character to write about:

Tony Stark, for sure. There are just a bunch of slightly different takes, and a lot of canon to work with (kind of frustrating too though). And I’m a sucker for emotionally damaged snarky traumatized characters that are viewed poorly both in universe and out.

Favorite kind of fic to write:

This year? Fluff and smut combined. Maybe that’s not the right term really. I keep looking for and writing, even in the angstiest fics, for those soft moments. Sure, maybe it’s a super smutty kink scene, but I want the affection to be obvious. Maybe everyone is consumed by guilt, but I want it to be based in caring too much. Maybe there’s no real love, just sex and even that’s messed up, but I want to find that tiny bit of fondness.

And I want happy endings. Or endings that look like they’re going to be happy, at least, even if there’s all the angst first. I don’t think I’ve killed anyone this year? Who AM I?

Biggest disappointment:

Not finishing the rough draft of Gotcha. I was making such good progress in 2019, from August to December. Even after the move, I basically finished part 6 in January. I fumbled around and fussed with 1 a lot, but that had already been given one draft, really, and I got through half of 4 before I slowed to a stop. I’ve barely gotten anything accomplished on it since June. Bits and pieces here and there, but nothing significant, not like I was doing. I can excuse October, due to 80k invested in Kinktober (yikes!), but aside from that… I’m sad. I’ll finish it eventually, but I really thought I could have the first draft done in a year. I’m sitting at about 480k out of what I’m almost certain will be 700k.

Biggest surprise:

Kinktober! It was kind of spur of the moment, decided just a week in advance. I’ve tried month long or even like, 20-25 day long challenges and I don’t think I’ve ever completed one. I thought there was a good chance I’d do so again, so I gave myself a little help and made my own list of prompts, things I knew I liked and hadn’t done much of yet. And it worked? I actually completed it, what the hell? Despite spending five days travelling near the end! Despite falling behind in getting ahead and writing a bunch of stories the day they were to be posted! Despite apparently forgetting how to do short form!

I, uh, could have done without the spawning of eleven series or sequels or continuations jfc WHY SELF.

Something you learned this year:

Ideas breed ideas. I swear to god, the second I sit down to think through a current idea, I wake up the next morning with three more.

Words need to be restocked. I need to consume new - not rereads, not fic - content every so often to refresh my word bank. It is astonishing how quickly writing goes again after I’ve done so.

I can write so much more than I thought I could. I can do so much more than I thought I could. Yes, I can complete challenges without dropping out early. Yes, I can do exchanges and not regret it. Yes, I can write more than 100k, more than 200k, more and more - and I can write 10k+ easily too. Though I wouldn’t mind if I could once again write less than 10k without feeling like I’ve cut off in the middle.

My time is shrinking, and if I want to write as much, I’m going to have to make the time. I can’t rely on three days off a week, on seven hours of uninterrupted overnight shifts, on hyper focused writing binges that leave everything else around me on fire.

Most memorable comment:

So, so many! I can’t pick one. I’ve been really lucky to get a bunch of really detailed, enthusiastic, analyzing comments across all different fics. One of the types that always sticks with me are the ones like ‘I didn’t think/know I liked this ship/kink/twist, but fuck, apparently I do? You made me, what the hell?’.

What, if anything, are you going to try to do differently in your writing in the new year?

So with writing Gotcha but not posting until it’s done, my view of what I’ve written vs anyone else’s is extremely skewed. I’m sitting here thinking, hey I’m 400k in and got another 10k done today, so much writing! While anyone looking at my AO3 account (for most of the year) is like, you’re averaging three months between fics :(

All that to say I want to try and get something posted more frequently while I’m working on Gotcha.

Also, writing for kinktober was really interesting - pushing myself to write every single day, often for that day’s post, forced me to get back into shorter form fic. Which used to be all I did? But it was surprisingly hard to just stop and not write more. So I’d like to challenge myself to write more fics under 10k at least. Maybe even under 5k though that might be asking a lot lol. I might get there with the many continuations of those fics I’d like to do. Does that count?

Goals:

I want to hit 365 fics. :) I’m only 32 away!

Aside from writing -

I’ve really enjoyed the reading record sideblog I started this year. I’ve let it lapse a little the past month or so, but I’d like to keep it going strong.

I’d like to leave a lot more comments. I want to get better about allowing imperfection - I want to write The Best Comment, but in the end? Probably 90% of fic writers are going to be happier with a comment expressing enjoyment in any way over no comment at all.

And not just on fics, but on general posts as well. It’s hard not to feel… weird and stupid and invasive and rude leaving any sort of comment on someone’s post if I don’t know them at least a little. I have godawful rejection sensitive dysphoria and a lot of interactions that ended poorly; I’m really not good at people. But as dumb as it feels to say those things, I know I am thrilled and warmed and happier when there’s a reblog with tags or a note or a comment or an ask or just, any small interaction that shows someone out there notices and cares, at least a little. There’s no reason I can’t at least try to offer that to other people.

I’d like to make/run a couple challenges of my own, later in the year. I’m still figuring out what I want to do and what I could do. I’m really interested in doing something that’s not focused on creators, but the readers; some sort of comment or rec challenge maybe.

I want to find a cheerleader for Gotcha. I’m struggling to keep up my motivation to write it when it’s already in my head, where I can ‘read’ it any time. There’s a line between depending too much on external validation and trying to generate all your validation yourself, and I’m getting to a point where I think I need to ask for help (gasp! The hardest thing EVER).

(Part Two: Pick Some Fics)

#end of year #unsettled rambles

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starker-stories · 5 years

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Long Lenses

It’s been awhile since I posted something new & original. This has been sitting forgotten in my WIPs for a bit. Lost it, found it, posting it.

Also on AO3

If you like what I write, may I recommend subscribing to my feed? After having lost my blog to my own idiocy, I kinda have a distrust of tumblr. I’ve had other issues here with things just disappearing for no reason. Plus when tumblr (or I) mess up, anything below a readmore disappears. So AO3 is the best place to read my stuff. It’s ALL there, long or short.

Relationships: Peter Parker/Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark Characters: Peter Parker, Tony Stark, Quentin Beck, May Parker (Spider-Man) Additional Tags: Cheating, College Student Peter Parker, Closeted Character, Arguing, Happy Ending, Manipulation, Closeted Tony Stark, Press and Tabloids, Secret Relationship, Homophobic Language, used only once, Outing, Offscreen Pepper Potts, Cheating isn't Starker

Summary: “You’d much rather give the world the image of a happily married heterosexual man than to have the world know that you just go through the motions with her and are secretly as gay as I am,” Peter said bitterly. -------------------------------------------------------------------

“Stay,” Peter said, lying in bed still long before dawn on Sunday morning. He watched Tony dress.

“You know I can’t.” Tony made sure that his suit was appropriately rumpled, his shirt pulled out on one side, his tie askew. He took a drink, rinsed his mouth with the strong scotch. Sloshed a little out of the glass onto his shirt to make the picture believable.

“Stay.” Peter reached out his hand. Tony bent over and kissed Peter, who frowned. “I hate it when you smell like that. Almost as much as I hate the way you smell on Saturday afternoon when you get here. I don’t know what’s worse, watching you pretend to be a drunk or having you smell like her.”

“Peter, you knew the terms when you said yes.”

“And I knew the terms when you said you were going to leave her. When’s that gonna happen, huh?”

Tony sighed. “I hate it when you wake up.”

“You’d rather just sneak out and leave me to wake up to an empty bed,” Peter said angrily.

“Look, she knows I go out with friends on Saturday night. She hates it and gives me hell for it, but I’m here every single Saturday. I have ‘business meetings’ scheduled every Wednesday. Which, since she’s still my PA, she knows I don’t.”

“After which you’re always out the door before ten.”

“Peter, if you don’t like it, I just won’t do it anymore, okay?”

“I’m that fucking inconsequential to you?”

“You know that’s not true. I love you.”

“Not enough to leave her.”

“Things are complicated.”

“Of course they are. You’d much rather give the world the image of a happily married heterosexual man than to have the world know that you just go through the motions with her and are secretly as gay as I am,” Peter said bitterly.

Tony sighed and headed for the door. “Whatever Peter.”

Before the door shut, with a tear strained voice, “Will I see you Wednesday?”

His answer was a closed door.

It didn’t stop him from fixing dinner for two after his last class on Wednesday afternoon. Or waiting nervously to see if the door to the apartment Tony paid for would open by Tony’s key. Almost two hours late, it did.

Tony leaned over and gave Peter a peck on the cheek. “Sorry. I tried to get out as soon as I could, but things ran long.”

He always smelled like her on Wednesdays but this time her perfume was stronger than normal. “It’s okay. I just turned the lasagna down when I noticed you were running late.”

Tony sat at the kitchenette table and watched as Peter laid the dinner. “How was class? Professor Martinez still giving you a hard time?”

“Nothing I can’t handle.” Peter smiled as Tony poured the wine for both of them. “I thought I’d take fifteen hours next semester instead of twelve. Other than physics, the rest is a breeze. I can handle more work.” He paused. “Is that going to be okay? It’s going to cost more.”

“If you think you can handle the course load, you know I have no problem with that, baby. I want you to get whatever you can out of school. Fifteen hours a semester? And if you take summer courses, you can graduate in three years.”

Peter laughed. “One more than it took you.”

“Yeah baby, but I got all my prereqs done while I was in high school. You had to trudge through all that last year.”

“I just didn’t want to take summer classes, that’s all. You mentioned something about a yacht,” Peter said teasingly.

“Yeah, well…”

Peter tried to hide his disappointment. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“It’s just that the press… every time I take the boat out, they’re out there with their long lenses. Fuck, last time they caught me and Pep nude sunbathing with a drone.”

Peter’s lips drew into a sharp line. He’d seen those pictures of course. Nude sunbathing wasn’t the half of what they’d caught. “Summer classes are fine,” he said tersely.

“I’m sorry baby.” Tony reached his hand across the table and took Peter’s in it.

Peter shrugged. “It is what it is, right?”

“I was thinking…” Tony smiled. “I’d take a hell of a hit in the prenup, but if she caught me with another woman… We still couldn’t be public, but as a single man I’d have a lot more time to spend with you.”

Peter brightened. “You’d do that?”

“Pretty sure she already suspects something. It wouldn’t be hard to convince her. To have some ‘well meaning’ friend of hers catch me with a girlfriend and tell her.”

“Then I’d just have to share you with your girlfriend. There’d have to be one, right?”

“Just for show.”

“Why can’t it just be us? No one would care.”

“I still do business in a lot of parts of the world where they do care.”

“I’ll never have you to myself, will I?”

“You’ll always be the only one who I love. Why do we have to fight? I get to see you so little, I hate to spend it fighting.”

Peter smiled. “I can think of much better ways to spend the next two hours.”

~~~~~

It wasn’t difficult to make a device to disguise his voice. Finding a payphone in a New York suburb was harder, but he hacked into the phone company’s computer and got a list of every functional payphone within twenty miles of a train stop. Getting there untraceably was another challenge. But trains were anonymous and cab drivers even more so when you behaved normally without anything odd to set you apart from dozens of other fares. The phone was a lot closer to the train station than he thought, so he decided that after his call, he’d just walk back there. Even more anonymous.

Finding a reporter with a grudge against Tony Stark wasn’t hard at all. Finding one who had the clout to push a controversial story past frightened editors narrowed the field down to one, Quentin Beck.

“Mr. Beck? I’ve got some news about Tony Stark you might be interested in.”

“I doubt it. I’d need sources and those dry up as soon as Stark starts throwing his money around.”

“He’s having an affair.”

“I thought you said news. Everyone knows that he cheats on his wife.”

“With another man?” Peter added.

“You have my attention. That’s a hell of an accusation. I’ll need details and undeniable proof.”

“Details I can give you. Proof, you’ll have to get on your own.”

“Details then,” Beck said tersely.

“They meet every week.”

“How do you know this?”

“I see him go in. I know who lives there.”

“How do you know that he’s not seeing a woman there? Because like I said, that’s no news at all.”

“The women living in that building are either old or with kids,” Peter expected Beck to take the bait sooner than that. He was having to improvise.

“Lotta women with kids screw around.”

“The only man living in that building is a queer. Stark’s gotta be at least twice his age. It’s sick.” It hurt Peter to have to refer to both of them like that, but Beck was still resisting.

“Address?”

Peter gave him the address of the building he lived in. “He’s there every Saturday. I don’t know if there’s any other time. I’ve seen him go in. My shift ends at two and I’ve never seen him come out, so he stays until after that.” There were three different all night businesses on the same block as his apartment. It wasn’t unbelievable that someone in one of them could’ve seen Tony go into his building.

“Who are you? So I can credit you.”

Peter laughed. “I’m not losing my job over this.”

“So you’re just a concerned citizen.”

“Yep. I don’t like perverts passing themselves off as good married men.”

~~~~~

It was easy for Peter to take the intercom in his apartment apart and disconnect the buzzer to let Tony in on Saturday afternoon.

“Something’s wrong with my door thing.” Peter explained as he came down to the door. He was barefoot and wearing shorts so short they were barely covered by the hem of his t-shirt. “I can hear the doorbell ring, but I can’t buzz anyone in. My pizza last night was almost sent back. Fortunately the delivery guy phoned me.” He leaned up and gave Tony a quick peck on the cheek as he shut the glass lobby door behind him.

“Glad to see you’re in a better mood tonight.” Tony smiled and caught Peter by the waist returning his peck with a more substantial kiss.

“I get to have you in my bed all night, of course I’m in a better mood.” Peter smiled, took Tony’s hand and led him up the stairs to his apartment which was over a block of small shops.

There was no arguing, no demands, no pouting. Peter had no idea if Beck actually took his tip seriously or not. But it was a last ditch effort to finally have Tony be his. Tony would never know how Quentin Beck got his information. He was one of the reporters who dogged him ceaselessly and one he hadn’t been able to control. Peter was fairly certain that Tony would believe it was just bad luck and Beck following him trying to get dirt on something else.

Upstairs, Tony took apart Peter’s intercom and found the singed wire he made to look like an ordinary short.

“Thank you. It’s so hard to get the super up to do anything around here. I’m not complaining. It’s a nice apartment, close to school, and right on the subway, so it’s perfect. But you know… they try to get away with doing as little work as possible.”

Tony laughed. “I should buy the building.”

“It’s a little down market for you, don’t you think?”

~~~~~

It was one of the best Saturday nights they’d had in a long time. Especially since Peter pretended to be very hard asleep when Tony got up to leave. He grumbled a little and turned over but then drifted (or seemed to) right back off.

Now all he had to do was wait for the papers. It was probably too late to make it into Sunday’s but Monday morning? Peter didn’t buy a copy. He didn’t want the evidence lying around his apartment. But the library at school had subscriptions to every New York paper. It wasn’t in the paper Beck worked for. Peter was about to give up, disappointed that his scheming came to nothing. Then he saw the tabloid. It didn’t have a byline for Quentin Beck, just ‘staff’. Peter supposed that when his editor shot him down, Beck decided that a paycheck was worth more than a byline.

The pictures were remarkably clear. Peter winced at seeing how clear his face was in addition to Tony’s. He winced harder when he read the article and found out that either Beck or the tabloid’s staff had discovered his name from the apartment’s records. And even worse, they had copies of checks from Tony’s private account that showed he paid Peter’s rent.

He ran home from the school library. There were reporters outside his door. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I forgot my chemistry text. I need to get back before my next class. Why are you here? Let me through! Don’t touch me!” He twisted out of the reporter’s grasp. He was shaking so hard he couldn’t get his key to work. They were shouting questions at him and cameras were going off around him. Three tries later, he was inside the lobby where reporters weren’t allowed to go. He didn’t wait for the elevator but ran up the stairs. He pulled the curtains shut and curled up in the middle of the bed, crying.

Clearly, he had not thought this through. He had grossly miscalculated and he regretted his decision tremendously. Instead of doing something to assure him of finally having Tony all to himself, he might have driven him away permanently.

Peter sat staring at his phone, hoping Tony would call. It rang often, but he didn’t answer. Tony had a special ringtone. All other calls, even from his friends, he rejected. Tony didn’t call. Peter imagined he was busy trying to put out the fires on his end. After a few hours, he tried to call Tony. It rang once and then went straight to voicemail. He didn’t leave a message. He waited another hour to the same results. The next call, two hours later, he left a voicemail.

“Tony, I’m scared. They’re outside my door. I… I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say. I’m locked in and I’m alone and I don’t know what’s going on.” He was crying. “What happened, Tony? Please call me back. Please. I know… I know things have to be bad for you too. But I’m scared, Tony. I’m scared.”

Not only might he lose Tony, but his whole life was about to be ruined. If they had the rent checks, they would find other things too. Like his school schedule. Like the fact that Tony was paying his tuition. That he’d set up an account for Peter to pay for groceries and books and other little things. Oh god, they might even find out his aunt’s name and number.

“May? Has anyone… Have you…” Peter was sobbing.

“Peter, what’s going on? I went to work and my friend showed me the paper. You and Tony Stark? Is that true? I know they can make pictures up to look like whatever they want.”

“It’s true. It was a secret. It was supposed to stay a secret. I don’t know how they found out. They’re outside my door. I could barely get into my apartment building.”

“He’s married, Peter. How could you!”

“He said he was going to leave her. He said he loved me.”

May sighed. “Sweetie, they don’t ever leave their wives, you know that. Men like Tony Stark… he buys and sells people like they were nothing.”

“He isn’t like that, May. He… he was going to leave her. He had a plan and everything. It was just going to take time. He loves me and I love him.” He sniffled and tried to stop crying. “Are you okay? They haven’t bothered you, have they?”

“I’ve had some calls but I hung up on them. But no one’s been here at the apartment though. Not like your place. The internet has the story already. I saw your picture trying to get into your building.” She paused. “Is it true he pays for your rent?”

“Y-y-yeah.” He was sniffling again. “And my tuition and everything else.”

“So you don’t have a job like you told me.”

“I used to. When I told you, I was an intern at Stark Industries, that was true. But it only lasted a few months before Tony and I… I’m sorry May. I didn’t want to lie to you, but it had to be a secret. He couldn’t have anyone knowing.” He started crying again. “Now everybody knows. And he isn’t calling me back.”

“Peter, even if everything you said is true, that he loves you and was going to leave his wife, he can’t call you right now. If… I don’t even know how to explain this to you… you’re young. You don’t know what it’s like to be married.”

“Not you and Ben… that never happened between you, did it?” Peter sounded afraid.

“No, no. Neither of us were like that. But you hear about it from friends. There are friends I have at the hospital whose husbands cheated on them. It’s… messy. It’s complicated. And that’s without being famous and the press hounding them all the time. This can’t be easy for his wife. Think about her. I don’t mean to be harsh, sweetie, but you just ruined her life.”

“I’m not the first affair he’s had,” Peter said defensively.

“But you’re the one he got caught with. And the only man.”

“Not even that.”

“Okay. But you’re the one she can’t deny or push under the carpet or pretend she doesn’t know about.”

“I don’t care about her,” Peter said angrily.

“That’s obvious,” May said, with a little anger of her own.

“It’s not my fault.”

“Whose is it? You knew he was married. The whole world knows he’s married. Sure, it took both of you, but you didn’t have to say yes. How long has this been going on?”

“About a year and a half.”

“Peter!”

“We’re in love. He doesn’t love her. He hasn’t loved her for a long time. Even before me.”

“I can believe that man has no morals, but you? I thought…”

“I’m in love with him,” Peter interrupted her. “That’s all I know. I’m in love with him.” Peter was sobbing. “You don’t know him like I do. Nobody does. He’s different when he’s with me.”

“Well, I’m not going to talk to anyone about it. I didn’t know anything and obviously, I still don’t know anything. I thought I knew you but…”

“You do. You just don’t get it. We fell in love. That’s not something you can control.”

“But you can control acting on it. I’m sorry you’re in the mess you’re in, but it’s a mess you made for yourself. You have to think of the other people whose lives you ruined by choosing to sleep with a married man.”

~~~~~

It was after midnight before Tony’s ringtone played on Peter’s phone. “Tony?” he asked hesitantly.

“Yeah baby. I’m so sorry. I should’ve known… I never meant for you to be caught up in this. The damn fucking reporters follow me everywhere.”

“Are you okay?”

“I will be. Like was going to happen with my plan, I’m gonna take a hell of a hit to the pocket by the prenup. She insisted on a cheating clause, knowing my lack of ability to keep it in my pants. But she never would’ve pulled that trigger unless something went public.”

“But you can manage that, right?”

“It’s not gonna send me to the poorhouse, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“I’m not. You know I don’t love you for your money. I hope you do.”

“I know baby. Bad joke. Sorry.”

“Are you still at home?”

“Nope. I mean, it’s still going to be my home once the separation’s over and done with. The building belongs to the company and the company belongs to me. I’ll need to buy out her share of the penthouse, but that’s not a problem. It was just prudent that I be the one to leave right now. Give her time to cool down, let the lawyers hash things out.”

“I wasn’t sure you’d call.” He paused. “Ever.”

“Really? Doubt me that much?”

Peter sighed heavily. “Things don’t usually work out well for the ‘other woman’.”

“Yeah, but the guy usually isn’t in love with the ‘other woman’. I love you.”

“Still? Even though…” He sighed again. “The other woman turned out to be the other man?”

“It’s kind of a relief, actually. I mean, yeah, life is gonna be hard for awhile, but then we can be together.”

“You still want that?”

“You still want me?” Tony asked.

“Yeah, Tony. I’m kind of in love with you.” He paused, twirling the fringe on his bedspread in his fingers. “My aunt kinda hates me.”

“I’m sorry. The whole homewrecker thing?” Tony asked.

“Yeah. She doesn’t understand.”

“It doesn’t help that the papers are… fucking ruthless. But what’s done is done. No putting this genie back in his closet,” he laughed wryly.

“I’m sorry Tony.”

“Not your fault baby. It just never happened before because I never stayed with the same person for more than a few nights. After a year and a half, my habits got picked up on. Traveling to the same place on a regular schedule. Someone was bound to catch me sooner or later.”

“So what’s gonna happen now?” Peter asked.

“Well, I could always have Happy drive by and pick you up to bring you to my suite at the Plaza.”

“What‽”

Tony chuckled. “Not like we have to keep it a secret anymore. Not like the whole world doesn’t know I’m into guys after today’s headlines. Not like she can sue me twice for cheating on her. The only question is how much heat are you willing to bear to be with me. Because it’s gonna get really hot for you, baby. They’re gonna dig out every nasty word in the thesaurus and print them.”

“Do I get to be with you?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Let them print,” Peter said with fierce determination. “I’ll send them a list in case their thesaurus isn’t complete.”

#starker #Von writes stuff #starker-stories formerly starkestories

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downwardfalling · 5 years

Text

the world is moving

“Did it hurt?” Tony reaches over with his right hand, a piercing red silhouette in the night, and gently grazes the swollen skin.

“Oh,” Peter blinks twice. Then, “No.”

- Or, Peter and Tony’s relationship in five acts, as told through bruises.

Read on AO3 :))

;;

Act I

The length between the tip of Tony’s pointed dress shoes and the threshold of Peter’s hotel door is simply a single footstep. And yet, Tony stands on one end, struggling to cross the distance. Peter’s fourteen, his more rational side reasons, and has already been spiderman for a couple of months at least. He should know how to treat a black eye.

“Mr. Stark?” Peter looks surprised to see him when Tony finally works up enough nerve to knock on the door. His worst worries are confirmed. Half of Peter’s face is swollen, marred by a bruise that encroach on his otherwise youthful features.

“In the flesh.” Tony gives something of a wan smile as he brushes past him.

“Wha-what are you doing here? I mean, not- not that I don’t want you here, of course.”

Tony doesn’t know how to answer the question without seeming like he cares too much, so he doesn’t. “Are you enjoying the hotel?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, it’s great.” Peter pauses for a moment. Then, more quietly, as if sharing some great secret, he adds, “There’s even a TV in the bathroom, Mr. Stark. The bathroom. ”

Steve must’ve hit his head one too many times because he hears awe in Peter’s voice, and worse, finds it reassuring. But even sleep deprived and beaten, Tony knows the real reason why, as much as he refuses to admit it. The fact is, he messed up bad, and Peter saw the repercussions: Tony’s life work– his friendships, his career, his family– fell apart, loud and rickety like an unoiled machine. A part of him feared that Peter would finally see him for who he is. Not a hero. A fuck up. That same part of him is glad that Peter doesn’t. It’s selfish, but he puts it in the back pocket to unpack later.

“Thank you so much for this, Mr. Stark. It’s really great. I haven’t even been on a plane before, and now I’m fighting with the Avengers in an airport. I mean obviously, I would rather be fighting with the Avengers and not against the avengers, but you can’t win them all.“

Tony swallows hard, fighting back affection that Peter seems to command without knowing. He’s just too young. Too good. “No problem, kid. Do me a favor, and sit on the bed over there.”

Peter sits on the edge, clasping his hands neatly on his lap in front of him. He smiles, genuinely (teeth, gums, and all), even though he has bruised flesh under his left eye that forces it halfway closed. His right eye shines with reverence and youth and excitement that, along with affectionate, makes Tony sick to the stomach with guilt.

“You need ice,” Tony croaks, quickly turning away to hide whatever emotions he was uncareful enough to let show.

Peter either doesn’t notice, or doesn’t point it out. “Hm? For what?”

“For your face.”

“Oh.” He gingerly presses his fingertips against the skin under his eye, as if he had just remembered the bruise that had been the source of Tony’s penitence since he first saw it forming in the car ride back to the hotel.

Tony hands Peter the bag of ice. “Keep this on for a little while.”

“Yeah, thanks.” Peter presses the ice to his eye and leans back to rest against the headboard. “Oh, by the way, Mr. Stark, I just wanted to let you know that you were super badass today.”

“Oh?” Tony snorts, sitting on the edge of Peter’s bed after his curiosity wins out over his better judgement. “How so?”

Peter grins. “Well, you’re always kind of badass. But seeing you in person today was on another level. And more importantly, seeing you fight for what you believe is right and what you believe would be the best for other people.”

“Oh,” Tony frowns, unbelieving and unused to receiving so many genuine compliments at one time. “You think so?”

“More than think so. Know so.” Peter presses on passionately, as if he somehow sensed Tony’s doubt. “My uncle Ben used to love Harry Potter, and he would always say that it is the quality of one’s convictions that determines success, not the number of followers.”

Peter leans closer to Tony, clenching his fist against his chest to show how strongly he believes in what he’s saying. “You’re a really good person, Mr. Stark! That’s why you will always be badass, even if Mr. Captain America doesn’t think so anymore.”

Tony blinks, trying to stave off sweet relief and the beginnings of tears that came with it. “Wow, kid. Are you always this…?” He makes a roundabout gesture with his hands, as if it were sufficient enough for his lack of a better word.

“Honest?” Peter offers.

Tony scans Peter’s face, looking for some hint of sarcasm, or some form of mockery, because there’s just no way someone can have so much faith in him. Instead, he sees what he’s seen all along, youth, and reverence, and just pure good. Tony has to get out of here fast before Peter gets himself into something he doesn’t want to be in.

“I should get going now.” He gets to his feet as Peter blinks at him in confusion. “Rest, and keep that ice on for at least another ten minutes.”

“Will do!” It’s the last thing Tony hears before he’s out the door.

The distance between Peter’s hotel room and the tip of Tony’s shoes had only been a single footstep. When Tony crossed it, he had unknowingly crossed a fine line. But as he walks to his hotel room, shaking his head, he vows to stay away. Because he destroys everything he touches. and the last thing he wants to do is destroy Peter.

;;

Act II

“Who knew shattering your leg would cause severe internal bleeding? Weird, right?”

“Pete, please stop talking, or I swear to Jesus himself, you will regret it.”

“Yessir,” Peter salutes, and for two seconds, looks like he actually considers listening to him. “But wow, I can’t feel my entire right side.”

“That’s it.” Tony says, stepping around Bruce to make threatening eye contact with him. “When you’re better, you still won’t feel your leg. Why? Because you won’t have a leg. And why is that? Because I will have ripped it right out of its socket.”

Peter’s eyes start to droop, the likely effect of the medication they had given him when he first arrived. Quietly, he mumbles, "That’s just cold.”

Bruce stops to remove his hands from the IV on Peter’s arms and places them on Tony’s shoulders, slowly guiding him backwards and out of the room.

“Hey, buddy, I think you should step out for a bit. Get a breather. Maybe even a cup of water.”

“What, why? I’m fine.”

“No, you’re hysterical.”

“No, I’m not"

“Yes. You are.”

Tony looks over Bruce’s shoulders and sees nurses frantically working around Peter’s bed. Peter, finally asleep from medication, looks peaceful and blissfully unaware, even when his right leg is mangled enough that pieces of his bone pierce through the skin, and the majority of his thigh is black from severe internal bleeding. Tony isn’t privileged enough to be spared from the sight. His stomach churns uncomfortably, and it makes him lightheaded. He looks down, and his hands slightly shake from adrenaline.

“Yeah, I could use a cup of water,” he finally relents.

“Good, I will let you know when we’re done.” Bruce pats him on one shoulder. He must see the reluctance on Tony’s face because he adds, “He will be fine, Tony,” and then shuts the door.

In the time he was locked out of the medbay (which he owns, Tony bitterly points out to himself), he had the time to get not one, but six cups of water. He could have gotten more, but had been too busy making an internal list. The first thing he had to do once Peter was out of surgery was strangle him. Then, he’d call his scary, yet attractive aunt, and suffer the consequences of Peter’s actions, while May coddles Peter through phone, and promises to visit straight away after work. Finally, he’d strangle Peter again, lovingly this time, and force him to promise to never pull a stunt like this ever again, only for Peter to break it, at most, three months later.

Bruce finally steps through the sliding glass doors as Tony tries to figure out the best way to break the news to May. “Alright,” he says, taking off his gloves. “He’s all fixed up.”

Tony gets off the chair he had been sitting on for the past three hours, and furrows his eyebrows. “As easy as that? No permanent bone damage?”

“As easy as that. His healing factor is really quite something else.”

“Don’t tell him that, or he might get more creative next time.”

Bruce rolls his eyes, but steps aside to let Tony through. “You can see him now. Be gentle, he just woke up.”

“Oh Brucie Bear,” Tony sighs, patting Bruce’s shoulder as he steps by. “What am I if not gentle?”

Peter had nearly fallen back asleep in the time he was left alone, and Tony, seeing him slowly nod off like the kittens in the cat videos Peter forces him to watch, feels all the previous agitation and anger leave him, as quickly as air deflating out of a balloon.

“Hey Pete,” Tony whispers. His fingers hover hesitatingly over his forehead, but eventually, he reaches to brush Peter’s fringe out of his eyes.. “How are you feeling?”

“Hm?” Peter squints at him, pushing up on his elbows. “Oh, hey, Mr. Stark. M’fine.”

“Wow, and the press calls me a dirty liar,” Tony says drly, leaning over to help Peter sit upright against the pillows. “You wanna tell me what happened?”

Peter winces. “Not particularly, but I’m guessing if I don’t, you’ll go through Karen, and I have some pretty embarrassing footage I don’t want you to see. Shit. Shouldn’t have said that.”

“No harm done,” Tony says, his voice laced with faux comfort. “I’ve already seen them. Your impression of Thor is really cream of the crop. Absolutely spot on. I’m sure Thor would agree. You know, once I show it to him.”

Peter gasps, pressing his hand to his chest. “You wouldn’t.”

“Oh, but I would if you don’t tell me who did this to you.”

Peter groans into his hands and sinks further into his pillows, deliberating his options for a few moments.

“Ugh, fine,” he eventually concedes, embarrassment too large a price. “But you have to promise me you won’t commit first degree murder.”

“No can do. Thou shalt not lie, and all that. Besides, I don’t think you should worry too much about what happens to him when he nearly tore you to shreds.”

Peter glances down at his tightly bandaged leg in a disappointed frown. The turn of his lips create harsh lines around his mouth and between his brows that make him look wrought with fatigue, and years beyond his age.

“Yeah,” Peter mutters, a bit breathless. “He really got me good.”

Tony places a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “Pete,” he says gently, leaning down to make eye contact. “I know that you think you have to do this all alone, but you don’t. Whoever hurt you is dangerous, and deadly. You could’ve died, Peter. It does not make you weak to ask for help.”

Peter reaches up to grip the cuff of Tony’s button-up, tugging on it until Tony sits on the edge of his bed. He doesn’t make an attempt to move after that, simply clutches the fabric tightly between his fingers, wrinkling the material where it disappears underneath his fingertips.

“He calls himself the Green Goblin,” Peter whispers, many minutes later. “He’s large, and strong and…and scary.“

“Okay,” Tony says, nodding his head. “Thank you for telling me. We’ll figure it out together. Maybe I can even threaten Rhodey into helping. Not that I would need to. He’s putty in your hands.”

Peter laughs, releasing his grip to press the back of his hand against his mouth. “ Mr. Stark,” he says, giggling. The lines on his face disappear to reveal the youth and naivety that Tony will always associate with Peter.

“It’s your stupid cat videos,” he says, smiling, pleased with his laughter.

“Thank you,” Peter whispers. His hands fidget for a little, until finally settling to fiddle with the loose seams of the blanket. “And I’m sorry if I scared you.”

Tony grunts. “Why do you always thank me for doing nothing? And yes, but you’re always scaring me. I’m only just a little used to it by now.”

“Really?” Peter’s voice pitches. “Because it didn’t seem like it. At least from what I remember.”

“You probably don’t remember much. You were all delirious with the drugs.”

“But seriously. I really want to thank you for agreeing to work with me. Showing me the ropes, and all that. I haven’t… completely figured out how to handle all the superhero stuff yet, if you can’t already tell.” Peter gestures to his leg. “And there’s no one really better to show me how than you.”

Tony smiles, satisfaction settling in his body, warmly. Peter is always so startlingly sincere with his gratitude and admiration, and Tony has only gotten used to taking the compliments and thankfulness in stride rather than succumb to doubt.

“Thanks buddy,” he pats Peter on the shoulder. “Let’s see if you think that once I force you to call your Aunt.”

;;

Interlude.

“Hey,” Peter leans against the door. He shifts his weight from foot to foot and it makes him look small, and vulnerable and unsure.

“Come here,” Tony whispers, lifting his bed sheets. Peter stops playing with the hem of his shirt, and slowly walks over. He slips into the bed, and leans his back against the headboard, brushing his shoulders against Tony’s own.

He doesn’t say anything, and Tony doesn’t ask him to. Together, they sit in silence. Tony takes the time to contemplate life, and death, and chance. Peter, he assumes, thinks the opposite: war, and renewal, and luck.

Finally, Peter asks, “Did it hurt?”

“The snap?”

“Yeah.”

“No,” Tony lies.

Peter shifts side to side. He doesn’t believe him, and for a moment, Tony waits for Peter to lean away and call him a liar. Instead, he presses his head against Tony’s left shoulder, and, in doing so, reveals the large, blue bruise that blemishes his temple.

“Did it hurt?”

“What did?”

Tony reaches over with his right hand, a piercing red silhouette in the night, and gently grazes the swollen skin.

“Oh,” Peter blinks twice. Then, “No.”

They settle back into silence. Tony presses his cheek against Peter’s hair. They look across Tony’s room, past the leather armchair, past Morgan’s bunny from where it was abandoned on the floor, past the wall. They look ahead.

Tonight, they pretend that everything is fine. Tomorrow, Peter will help Tony dress the burn wounds on his right side, and Tony will press an ice pack against Peter’s temple. Tomorrow, they’ll heal.

;;

Act III

“Morgan, honey, what do we say when we do something bad?”

Morgan tilts her head and squints her eyes, thinking hard. “Shit?”

“Morgan!” Pepper presses her hand to her chest, aghast. She turns to Tony, lifting her finger accusingly. “ You.”

“I have no idea where she learned that, Pep. Scout’s honor.” Tony replies, trying to school his face into indifference. A futile attempt when Morgan twists to face him on her mother’s lap and gives him a small smirk that is the consequence of weekend sleepovers with Natasha, forcing Tony to hide his grin behind his hand.

“You were a boy scout?” Peter, who is holding a bag of peas against his head on the couch next to him, looks up with just a hint of a smile playing on his lips.

“No. He wasn’t.” Pepper gives Tony a glare over Morgan’s head, her eyes narrowed to a squint that meant she was only seconds away from sending Tony to the couch tonight, and shifts Morgan gently onto his lap. “You caused it, you deal with it.”

Tony leans over and presses a kiss to the top of Morgan’s head as Pepper walks down the hall, and out of hearing distance. Morgan giggles, and turns around to return it on the cheek. “What did I tell you before? Those are only Mommy’s words.”

Morgan nods seriously, looking as if she was hearing God himself dictate the eleventh commandment. “Mommy’s words,“ she repeats.

“That’s my treasure.”

“Treasure? She nearly took my life!” Peter scoffs, but with an undertone of care and affection that Tony hears more and more often when Peter talks to and about her. She’s going to grow up to be very spoiled, as clear when he thinks back to this morning– she had coaxed Tony into giving her yet another banana for breakfast, and after she finished, left the peel by the doorway for Peter to trip on when he finally got out of bed at noon.

“Petey,” Morgan says, reaching out to group three of Peter’s fingers in her hand. “I’m sorry.”

“Aw M, of course–”

“I should have known you weren’t smart enough to avoid it.”

Peter’s face goes slack, and Tony can read the shock on his face from the way his eyebrows disappear into his hairline and how his mouth falls slightly ajar. He slowly turns towards Tony, and narrows his eyes in the same manner Pepper had done just moments before.

Tony shrugs his shoulders. There was only one person capable of teaching impressionable, five year old Morgan such wyrness, and opposed to popular belief it wasn’t him. It was Peter.

“Morgan, that wasn’t very nice,” Peter warns threateningly. “Now you have no choice but to suffer my wrath!”

Peter reaches over to tickle Morgan’s stomach. Morgan shrieks, and falls off Tony’s lap and onto the couch in a fit of laughter.

“Noooo,” she cries. “I’m sorry, Petey! I’m sorry!”

“No can do, M.” But, Peter relents anyways, and leans down to give Morgan a peck on the cheek, even as he simultaneously presses peas against the bump on the back of his head. Tony changes his mind. She is already spoiled.

“Alright,” Tony says, playing peacemaker. “Now that this is settled. Let’s hit the lake!”

Morgan gasps, sitting upright on the couch. “The lake!” She cheers, already running to grab her flip flops.

“How is it that she’s the most adorable and cutest yet most evil person I know?” Peter sighs dramatically, placing the peas on the coffee table, now warm. He gets up off the couch and offers Tony a hand.

“You’re too little too late, Pete,” Tony says, groaning softly as he lets Peter pull him to his feet. “I asked myself the same question when she shat on my hand five years ago.”

“Petey! Dad!” Morgan runs by, now with her hair in a ponytail and with flips flops in hand. “C’mon let’s go! I want to take the boat out!”

“Coming, pumpkin.” Tony straightens his back, joints cracking loudly. “Ugh, that can’t be good. I’m getting too old for this.”

Peter laughs, patting Tony’s shoulder as he brushes past him. “Let’s go, Old Man. Before you hit the hay.”

Later that night, after Morgan fell fast asleep from a long day boating around the lake, and Pepper had dozed off after arguing with investors from Hong Kong, Tony does end up on the couch, but in his own volition. He’s nursing a cup of hot chocolate when Peter ventures into the living room.

“Hey,” he says, sitting down next to him. “What are you doing here? I thought old men slept like logs after their evil daughter connived them into speeding ten circles around on a boat.”

Tony snorts. “I could ask the same about older brothers.”

Peter looks content, and the sight of it unravels some knot that had been building at the pit of Tony’s stomach. It hasn’t been too long after the large and dramatic stand-off against Thanos, and a part of him had worried about life after. Life with both Peter and Morgan, but no Iron Man.

“How are you feeling?” Peter asks, eyes shifting across his face, as if he were searching for signs of distress. “Is it the nightmares again?”

Tony chuckles, and reaches over to brush back Peter’s hair. It’s gotten long, and if possible, even more curlier. May has been going on about having it cut, but for now, Tony counts it as a small blessing.

“Nope,” he says. “Another day scotch free. I think we should celebrate. Three months, a new record.”

“Oh,” Peter says, leaning back into the couch, his posture much more relaxed. “Then what are you doing out here?”

“Just enjoying the silence of the night. God knows we don’t get enough of it around here.”

Tony throws his arm around Peter’s shoulders, and Peter sags against him, cuddling into Tony’s side. Inside his bedroom, Pepper is dreaming of investment meetings, and new punchlines to throw at misogynistic corporate leaders. Down the hall, Morgan sleeps soundly.

Everything is as it should be, even if the only piece missing is Iron Man’s signature red and gold hues, tracing shapes into the sky like Earth’s brightest star. Tony has everything he needs right here.

;;

Act IV

“Tony,” Peter groans, pressing an ice pack onto his cheek, where a bruise was black, and blue and blooming around a long gash that reached from his upper cheek to chin. “Please stop pacing, and sit with me.”

“No,” Tony quips, but sits on the chair next to the medbay bed anyways. “I’m too busy trying to figure out why you felt the need to keep this from me.”

“Because you get all crazy? Like right now?”

“It’s me, ” Tony replies, leaning forward in his chair and ignoring Peter’s remark, looking all types of the tormented soul he is and will always be. “You used to tell me everything. And now you’re off on secret missions with Shield–”

”–yes, because that’s what secret means–“

”–or taking down whole New York crime syndicates by yourself, making friends with that human embodiment of a tabloid Johnny Storm, or worse– sneaking off to go to a party . It’s like I don’t even know who you are anymore.“

A look of understanding comes across Peter’s face. Like he’s just realized this is about more than Fisk’s underground Mafia work, more than even the illegal multiverse experiment that had been one spilled beaker away from tearing the universe into two. It makes Tony miss the years right after the Snap, miss when Peter’s first instinct would be to call him, before he had left for college, became war torn and world weary, and for whatever reason, decided that Tony simply wasn’t needed anymore.

“Tony,” Peter says, more gently this time, reaching his hand out. Tony takes it, holding it tightly in his own as if should he let his grip slack for even just a moment, Peter would break into a million pieces of dust, unmendable and gone, but never forgotten– just like he did on Titan, just like he does over and over again in nightmares that continue to plague him even years later.

“I’m always going to need my old man.” Peter jokes, but his face says otherwise: lips pressed together in a small smile, eyes bright with the beginnings of tears and something else. Love, Tony will amend, months later, thinking back to this memory as Peter hands him the invitation to his wedding.

“Then why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve helped you. Called for back-up, tracked him for you, Iron Man–”

“–is out of commission.” Peter’s eyes drift to Tony’s right arm, red and metallic, a synthetic replacement for the original which had been tragically incapacitated by the Snap.

“How am I supposed to help you if I don’t even know?“

Peter drops the ice bag to reach over and lay his hand on top of Tony’s, cupping it tightly between both of his own. “I don’t need Iron Man. I need Tony Stark. Tony who might not be there for the battle, but will always be there for me in the aftermath.”

Peter doesn’t say anymore, and he doesn’t have to. Tony has since learned the art of reading into the unsaid.

;;

Act V

Peter grips Tony’s hand too hard, and it creates fingerlike bruises on his skin.

“I can’t do this, Tony,” he says, using his other hand to wipe at his face. “I can’t. I just can’t.”

“Yes, you can,” Tony gives Peter’s hand a reassuring squeeze. Peter doesn’t bother to squeeze back, too busy looking down the hallway, eyes shifting left and right in search of the nurse.

“Do you think it’s done? Why hasn’t anyone come out yet? Do you think something went wrong? What if–” Peter’s face goes slack, and he slumps down on the chair, finally letting go of Tony’s hand to run them through his hair. “I think I’m having a breakdown.”

“Oh hey. You’re not that bad. If it makes you feel better, I vomited on the nurse twice before Pepper popped Morgan out.”

Peter gives Tony a long look and proceeds to groan. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“I don’t know. Do you feel better now?”

“Not particularly. But I am more distracted. The image of you vomiting is equally too familiar and hilarious.”

Tony smiles and lovingly pats Peter’s cheek, now less flushed from his previous outburst. “Then my job here’s complete.”

Peter returns the smile, and looks contemplatively at his hands. “Do you think MJ will be mad at me for not being with her?”

“Michelle? Probably not. She’s a strong, independent woman. And I’m pretty sure she’s the one who told you to leave after you started to freak out.”

“Ugh,” Peter grimaces, most likely reliving the memory. “I’m just not sure if I’m ready yet. To be a father.”

Tony reaches over to brush back Peter’s hair from his forehead. When Peter took over Stark Industries two years ago, he had gotten into the habit of gelling it back. It was one of Tony’s greatest losses. Today, he relishes in the fact that Peter left it undone, too in a hurry to get to the hospital in the middle of the night. His baby, who no longer looks it, is all grown.

“Do you know what’s the most important part of parenting?”

“No?” Peter slumps in his chair, saddened by his own ignorance.

“The answer’s more obvious than you think: love, and honesty and respect. Being emotionally open, loving your kid, and letting your kid know that, but also, somehow respecting their boundaries.”

Tony’s words do nothing to appease Peter. If anything, he’s more discouraged and sinks further into the uncomfortable waiting room chair.

“It’s a learning curve, but I’ll let you in on a little secret. Peter, you’re the most honest and affectionate person I know. Before I met you, I don’t even think I was capable of saying I like you, nevermind love. And look at me now, I spend all my time with you and Pepper and my baby Morgan who’s got me wrapped around her small yet powerful finger.”

Peter laughs, his eyes looking suspiciously watery. “Don’t worry. She’s got us all in her evil clutches.”

“My point is,” Tony continues, chuckling softly. “You’ve taught me all of these things about parenting, just by being yourself. I have so much faith in you, there are not enough words for me to even describe it.”

Peter looks as if he’s about to break into pitiful sobs, but the nurse steps out of Michelle’s room, smiling brightly as she calls Peter’s name, and saving him from what would’ve been inevitable seconds later.

“Oh god, I think I might vomit.”

“Oh no. Vomiting during labor only needs to happen once in history.” Tony jokes, feeling as if he might vomit himself. He pushes lightly on his shoulders. “In you go, Pete.”

The room is quiet when they walk in. Michelle is propped up against some pillows, simultaneously exuding tire and glowing with the newfound joy of motherhood. In her arms, swathed in light blue blankets, is the baby, sleeping comfortably.

“Oh my,” Peter chokes, approaching the side of the bed. “He’s just so tiny.”

“And yet he took so long to come out,” Michelle says, lids heavy as if she were on the brink of passing out. “Do you want to hold him, Peter?”

Peter hesitates for a few seconds, but reaches down shakily, and gently lifts the baby off Michelle’s arms. “Oh wow,” he says quietly, adjusting the baby’s blankets with one hand. “Hi there, baby. It’s me, your dad.”

Slowly, he turns towards Tony, tears making their way down the side of his face. “Look, Tony. It’s my baby. He’s beautiful.”

Tony looks down at the bundle, and indeed, burrowed between the creases of the fabric, is a baby boy with the beginnings of Peter’s hair, his nose, his ears, and if he looked closely enough, maybe his smile.

“Hey there, Beautiful,” Tony’s voice cracks. “You got a name yet?”

“Say hi to Grandpa, Ben. Benjamin Anthony Parker.”

;;

End.

The hospital room is dark, mostly lit by the dim yellow light that emanates from the small lamp next to the bed. Michelle is sleeping quietly, and beside her, still wrapped in baby blue blankets, is Ben. Across the bed, is a long, grey ottoman sofa. On one end, May is sleeping with her head tucked on Pepper’s shoulder. On Pepper’s other side is Morgan.

Tony watches everything from the other end of the couch, and tucked into his side, is Peter, exhausted but still clinging to the last dredges of consciousness.

“Are you still worried about fatherhood?”

Peter looks up at him with glassy and wistful eyes. “No. I have the best role model.”

At that, Tony smiles, content. He has all he needs, and then some, right here.

#marvel #irondad #peter parker #tony stark #baby fever #iron family #spiderman #iron man #this is me and my love for found families #please enjoy!!!!#irondad and spiderson

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sciencelings-writes · 5 years

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Last Man Standing

Summary: I wanted to write another endgame/ infinity war fix it where instead of Peter dusting, It’s Tony. shit goes a little crazy from there. 8.7k words, get ready fam. AO3 LINK

Peter sat in the guardian’s ship, frozen in place. He was in shock. Because the worst thing that could happen, happened again.

He was gone, Mr. Stark was gone. Tony was gone. Disintegrating into dust after a single glance into Peter’s eyes. No goodbye. Not like Ben. Uncle Ben had moments more than Tony did. Bleeding out. Peter didn’t know which was worse, A father figure dying in front of him, slowly, being able to hear his heartbeat slow and stop or his new father figure disappearing without even a chance to say a word. Just look into his eyes, looking worried but not having any time to think about it.

Peter had time to think about it. Too much time. He had worked with the blue cyborg woman to repair the ship for a few days. At least then he could distract himself. But she was working on getting them to earth, and he could only think. Or sleep. But sleeping was so much worse.

He had been zoning out for god knows how long. Hours? Days? It felt like an eternity and he didn’t feel like he was in his body at a certain point. He was only shaking out of it because of Nebula’s, the blue woman’s monotone voice.

“You need to eat.” She ordered simply. He took the space food out of her hand and muttered a thanks. Peter’s normally talkative demeanor was snuffed out after they lost. Nebula wasn’t much of a talker to begin with and they worked together out of necessity. Peter would always be thankful that she didn’t leave him alone on the planet even though she totally could have.

Once she got autopilot fixed and had no need to stay in the cockpit, she seemed to always be near him. Not close but within her silent gaze. He would try to fill his time by tinkering with extra parts and pacing around.

They had their real conversation a full week into flying in space. While they were frantically trying to upgrade the air recycling system so they wouldn’t die days away from earth. They had already run out of food and Peter was growing weaker but air was a little more important.

“Was he your father?” Nebula said dryly as Peter took out the power source from his Iron spider suit. It was a tiny arc reactor hidden in the spider on his chest, made out of nanites.

“Uh, kinda… not really. He’s my mentor but he is… was kinda like a dad to me. You know, teaching me how to be a hero and scolding me when I was being dumb…” His voice was a little hoarse from not being used and from not getting enough water in attempt to conserve it.

“You are lucky. My father was the one we were fighting.”

“Ouch, that’s rough. I thought my luck with father figures was bad…” This managed to lift the sides of Nebula’s mouth for the hint of a smile. It was gone faster than it came, she didn’t seem used to small talk.

“I’m sorry about what happened to him.” She grumbled as they worked.

“It happened to your friends too and half of the universe if I remember. I don’t even know if we are the lucky half.”

“We aren’t.” Nebula muttered. Peter knew she was right. It was much harder to live than it was to die.

Eventually, the work was done and they could rest. The would probably have a few more days of air but they both knew they wouldn’t get to earth fast enough. If they had to die, they would die together and Peter would really rather not die but if he had to die, at least he wasn’t alone.

He tried to hang out with Nebula more, explain earth things, show her how to play games like thumb wars, where she almost broke his hand. She would indulge him, knowing they were not far from suffocating to death. Or starving to death… or dehydrating to death. Whichever one happened first.

Peter got weaker and weaker without the food to sustain him. Nebula had given him her last ration. They were out of fuel, out of water, hours away from being out of air, out of food and out of hope.

They were still so many days away from earth when it got to the point where Peter couldn’t even stand. Nebula sat with him. She even picked him up and placed him on the co-pilots chair so that he could look at the stars instead of the dirty metal.

He was so so tired. It was probable that if he closed his eyes, he would never open them again. If he was hydrated enough to have tears come to his eyes, they would be. They were so close to death and so far away from home. And he was so tired…

His eyes closed, for what he thought would be the last time and he wondered what he would see. Would he see Ben? Tony? Would his mom and dad be up there? Maybe Nebula would see her sister again. Maybe there would be nothing at all. The thought made him strangely at peace. The pain would be over, the sorrow wouldn’t weigh him down, it would all be over.

That’s when a bright light apeared on the other side of his eyelids. He peeked them open, squinting his eyes as it had been so long since he had seen something so bright. Was this it? Was he dead?

The light faded slightly and revealed a blonde woman smiling. Was she an angel? Peter was delirious but it was a nice thought. Maybe she would take him to wherever Ben and Tony were.

She didn’t. She flew under their ship and carried it home. Peter fought to stay awake, he tried to call out to Nebula to tell her about the angel but his voice wasn’t very loud. He smiled knowing that they were saved.

They landed near Avengers Compound, there were people waiting for them. The glowing angel woman had to help Peter out of the ship but he made it. He had never been more excited to breathe in his life.

Captain America ran up to them. Before he could say anything Peter whimpered out a few words.

“I’m sorry… I lost him.”

“We lost,” Cap said sorrowfully. As if Peter couldn’t already tell. Pepper and Rhodey came running after Steve, they weren’t as fast as a super-soldier but they had much more reason to run towards the ship. Tony could’ve been on it. The thought made a ping of pain ripple through Peter’s chest.

“Did Tony-” Pepper started. She didn’t finish. She saw the look in Peter’s eyes and she knew. She put a hand over her mouth to muffle a sob and Rhodey tried to look composed but Peter could see him trembling.

“I’m so sorry…” Peter wheezed before starting a brief coughing fit that made him blackout for a moment. It was kind of spooky. The glowing angel woman still held him up and advised that they take him to the med bay.

That was the last thing he heard before everything went dark, thankfully, not for the last time.

***

He woke up after a terrible dream. By the time his eyes were open, he had already forgotten it but he still felt his heart race and sweat, the moisture of fear, in several uncomfortable places. He noticed the sweat and looked at the optimistic side. He was hydrated. He had enough water in his body that he could sweat.

Then he noticed everything else. He had needles and tubes everywhere they could medically stick him. His throat hurt, probably from having a feeding tube shoved down it. He had an IV and as many monitors that would fit on his malnourished body. The only other person in the room was Pepper. She was on her tablet and he noticed that there were slight shadows under her eyes. He knew he looked a whole lot worse though.

“Ms. Potts?” He said weakly. She looked up quickly and plastered on a fake smile.

“Hey, Pete. Did you sleep well?”

“Uh, Yeah.” he lied, “Did Aunt May…” his voice shook as he left the question hanging, suspecting the answer.

“I’m sorry Peter, she didn’t make it…” he looked down and avoided her gaze. Preparing himself did nothing and it was like the knife that was left by Tony’s death and it was now being twisted. In other words, it fucking sucked.

“This is a pretty sucky fifty percent huh…” Peter muttered after a wet sob.

“Yeah… you could say that.” Pepper smiled sadly as she wiped a few tears from her own eyes.

“Who else did we lose?” Peter asked, desperate for a distraction.

“The kind of Wakanda, his sister came with us to the compound, she wants to be part of the solution. Uh, Sam Wilson, you know, falcon, Nick Fury, Ant-Man…” she went on, naming everyone from celebrities to anyone she thought he would know. Including his friends.

The next few days were the worst of his life. He had to deal with everyone he was close to being dusted and being unable to get out of bed. The later was much less painful but it still bothered him. It made him feel useless in addition to absolutely destroyed and depressed.

Eventually, enough was enough. He took out everything except for the IV as he was still dehydrated and could roll it around pretty easily. He carefully got himself into his wheelchair and rolled himself to where his enhanced senses heard the somber avengers gathering.

Peter was surprised but not that surprised to see a raccoon in clothes in the room with the remaining heroes. He’s seen aliens, it wasn’t that weird to see a talking raccoon with a familiar accent.

“Kid, what are you doing out and about?” Rhode said, looking mildly concerned.

“I got sick of just sitting on my ass.” He grumbled. “Now, does anyone have any idea what we’re going to do or did I just exchange sitting on my ass with access to a comfortable bed for sitting on my ass in a room full of depression?”

“If we find Thanos and get the infinity stones back, we can theoretically bring everyone back.” Doctor Banner said calmly. He ignored Peter’s grumpy mood, everyone dealt with major tragedies differently.

“We couldn’t keep the stones from him, now he has the most powerful weapon in the galaxy and we have half the ranks with some of our best indistinguishable from the sand on a beach. And you want to go back and try again. Like he can’t just snap his fingers and have you join the rest of the universe. Yeah, that’s pretty stupid.” Peter spat as he settled near the holograms listing the people who were dusted.

“Well, do you have any other ideas?” Cap sighed.

“Yeah, anything but that.” Peter groaned. “You’ll all get killed and then the universe will have no hope. Maybe we can contain the stones or something.”

“We wouldn’t be able to do any tests, if it doesn’t work we’re all dead.” Doctor Banner shrugged.

“Tony Stark’s nanotech sheild deflected a direct blast from the purple infinity stone. That’s at least a start.”

“The purple one… that’s the power stone kid! So this dead guy deflected a hit from the power stone with his tech? I’d like to get a hold of that…” The raccoon exclaimed.

“You know, it’s really too bad that this all couldn’t have been avoided…” Peter looked directly at Captain America. He didn’t know why he was consumed with such irrational anger because he would never act this way normally. His line had been crossed weeks ago when Mr. Stark died in front of him. He was just at a point where he didn’t give a fuck.

“What are you even talking about kid?” Steve raised an annoyingly calm eyebrow.

“If only everyone was all together to fight him at once rather than separated and weaker. We almost got the gauntlet off with only like seven people, imagine if it was all of you guys too…” Peter hissed. “You know Tony warned you about this. He knew something was coming and nobody listened.”

“Ultron was made because of his paranoia.”

“So was the Vision. He was our superman and the only being I would trust with the infinite power that he was given. It really sucks because if you all just stuck together and you know, didn’t become war criminals because you had your heads so far up Mr. perfects ass, Tony would still be alive, along with all of my friends and the only family I had left.” Peter gradually started to yell. He had just held too much in for too long and apparently now was the time to let it out.

Most infuriating of all, Steve just stood there. He didn’t try to argue with Peter, he didn’t make any kind of retort. He just stood there with a blank expression.

“If you had any sort of trust in him, he would still be alive!” Peter ripped his IV out of his arm, it was just in the way and it had become one of the things that were just holding him back. He shakily stood up in his adrenaline-filled fury.

“Whoa kid-” Rhodey put a comforting hand on Peter’s shoulder but it did nothing to hold him back.

“No matter how strong and mighty you think you are, you’re nothing compared to the guy that killed him. Don’t let your fucking ego get in the way of the fate of the universe! A fucking wizard with fucking magic couldn’t take this guy down! You’re just full of steroids and misplaced self-confidence.” Peter limped his way to Steve with so much rage in his eyes that the man several inches taller backed away a little. “ So yeah, I’ve got nothing for you. No plan, no ideas, no trust, LIAR!” he had an accusing finger stabbing at Steve’s chest.

This, of course, was the exact time he started to feel light-headed. He stumbled back a little and barely caught his footing. After not standing for so long, thirty full seconds made his useless body want to give up.

He could sense angel lady and Rhodey being ready to catch him when he inevitably fell. He looked at Cap one last time, who also seemed like he was worried that Peter was going to fall.

“I… I don’t feel so good-” His voice shook, less than a second later, his vision turned black and he collapsed to the floor.

The next time he woke up, it was days later. He physically felt as good as new but that changed when he was told what happened while he was sedated. The Avengers came back with Thanos’ blood on their hands but no infinity stones. Thanos had the last laugh when he used the stones to destroy the stones. He destroyed the only thing that could get everyone back and it finally sunk in what happened. They were all gone. And unless they had some reality-defying solution, it would be for good.

***

FIVE YEARS LATER

***

Peter had moved on. Or at least he thought he did. For the first year after the snap, he put all his effort into finding a solution. He didn’t find one. He had to move on. Without MJ or Ned or even Flash, he didn’t have a reason to stay in the same grade. He finished high school early. He sped through college and when he turned eighteen, he revealed his identity to the world and became an official avenger.

He also became best friends with the new black panther and queen of Wakanda. They were both incredibly smart and the same age and were enhanced with the theming of an animal. She was the only person he could feel normal with. Well, It started out as best friends, it evolved a little beyond that.

They became an unstoppable duo, superheroing and not superheroing. They made a pretty good team in smash. Shuri always played Samus and Peter always played Kirby. Peter visited Wakanda when he couldn’t stand living in the city, they worked endless hours in her labs and alternated music choices to blast at ungodly volumes. It was some of the best times of his life.

He moved past Thanos and he finally felt kind of stable. That was until Scott Lang came back from the quantum realm with ideas that have already been thought of. Peter and Shuri had already tried time travel to get their loved ones back but for some reason, this was different. Scott came to them. Most people wouldn’t come to them, they were often underestimated for their intelligence and sometimes ego was a larger factor than actual intellect.

Ant-Man came to Peter and Shuri because right now, they were his best bet to get everyone back. At the moment, they were probably the smartest people on the planet. Sure it wasn’t as taboo as when they were teenagers but they were still too young to be respected as tech geniuses.

But Peter wasn’t ready to change everything again. He had finally found peace after years of trauma and loss. Of course he wanted everyone back but he didn’t know if trying again would just make everything worse. The world had moved on and accepted what happened. It had been over for years, reopening old wounds, potentially for nothing, did not sound fun.

That’s why he said no at first. Even the idea of Thanos still scared the shit out of him. Thanos was dead. At least this version of Thanos was. If they went back in time to get the stones… Thanos would still be alive. Peter thought he had seen the last of that dried eggplant asshole.

He worked on the time travel simulations after Shuri had gone to bed. Scott was staying in a guest room in the palace and Peter was all alone, with barely any hope, trying to solve time travel. Then he did it. At two AM when he was about to give up, he did it. The simulation worked. With the information Scott had about the quantum realm, they could use it to time travel and actually control where they went.

He could get them back… May, Tony, Ned, MJ… all of them. He could bring them back…

He spent the rest of the night crying with joy until he fell asleep on his desk. For once his sleep was peaceful. He dreamed of seeing them again.

***

“I figured it out.” He brought up, out of nowhere the first time they were all gathered for a hologram meeting with the avengers all around the world and the few in space. “Time travel. I figured it out. We can get the stones from the past and use them now to bring everyone back.”

There was silence for a moment as everyone thought about what he said.

“You… figured out time travel?” Natasha said and if Peter wasn’t mistaken, she sounded impressed.

“At least the method. It will take a few days to make the actual time machine. But it is possible and my simulations have been successful. We only have enough Pym particles for nine of us round trip excluding two tests. We’ll have to split up into teams to collect the stones so that we can get to them all. We can discuss everything at the compound after the machine is built so… avengers assemble I guess.” Peter said calmly, but he couldn’t keep a smile from his face.

“Well, you heard Spider-Man, Avengers Assemble.”

***

Peter decided not to go on the time-traveling adventure. They would need tech geniuses on both sides, just so nothing would go wrong. Shuri would go with Professor Hulk, Captain America, and Ant-Man to New York 2012, Carol would go with Rhodey to get the power stone from some planet in the past, punk Hawkeye and Black widow were going for the soul stone, and hobo Thor with Rocket, going to Asgard for the reality stone. The hulk had managed to get Thor out of his hole in New Asgard.

Hawkeye had tested the time machine by going into the past and saving some enhanced kids’ life. Someone named Piedro. He was apparently the magic girl’s brother. Well, she better be thankful when they bring her back from the dust.

“Everyone ready?” Peter said as he flipped all the switches and pressed all the buttons that he needed to get the large time machine set up. The avengers came into the room wearing their black and red quantum nano suits sans helmets.

The vibranium gauntlet that was to hold the infinity stones was waiting to be used beside him. It was hard to accept that for him, it was only going to be a minute before all of the stones were together. They were so close to bringing everyone back that it was almost impossible for Peter to wrap his head around it.

The Avengers took their places on the platform with Shuri bringing up the rear. Before she started on the steps, she leaned down to where he was sitting and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. She smirked at how red his face turned. Natasha snorted at his reaction. Rocket scoffed something that Peter couldn’t quite hear.

“Stay safe your highness. And uh, I guess everyone else.” Peter smiled shyly. “Okay, sending you all off in 3… 2...1!” He twisted a nob and everything started to glow. In a flash, everyone was gone.

“And they should be back in… 3… 2… 1!” He talked to himself as a flash of light flooded the room and everyone was back. Well, almost everyone. Everyone’s helmets disappeared and Natasha had tears in her eyes. Clint wasn’t in the group that came back. There was a moment of silence between all of the Avengers and Shuri jogged towards Peter and almost suffocated him in a hug.

“Woah woah, what happened? You okay?” He said worriedly.

“It’s fine, there were just a few bumps in the road.” She sighed. She looked a little bruised and had a few bloody wounds, nothing too bad though.

“It was a sacrifice…” Natasha said weakly. “It was the only way to get the stone…”

The room went quiet once again. They weren’t prepared for a casualty.

***

They would mourn Clint later, they had all the stones and could finally get everyone back. Peter’s veins were filled with adrenaline. He had never been so excited in his life. He wanted everyone back so fucking bad, but so much had changed. Would they even recognize him now? He was in his early twenties, he had grown so much. Physically and as a person. God, he was probably taller than Tony now…

“I’ll do it.” Carol interrupted his train of thought. Oh yeah, they were trying to decide who would do the snap. “I can absorb the energy that tries to damage me. I’m the safest option.” She said definitively. Thor and Professor Hult seemed to try to argue but Carol talked them down. It wouldn’t hurt her as it would hurt them. She was practically made of infinity stone energy, if anything, it could make her stronger.

Peter had used an enclosed robot arm to place the stones in the dark vibranium gauntlet and it was ready to be used. Carol picked it up and put it on impatiently. They had already waited five years for this moment, none of them wanted to wait any longer.

Arcs of multi-colored light grew on Carol’s arm, she didn’t even wince. She closed her eyes and snapped. There was no more lead up, she just did it.

Peter was the only one that felt an immediate change. He felt what he could only describe as a sigh of relief. It was like all the background noise he tended to tune out was doubled. He just felt the presence of people. It worked. Oh god, it worked. After all this time, they did it. Holy fuck.

It wasn’t a dramatic moment, it was just something that they couldn’t wait to be done. There was no music to confirm that everyone was back, they just had to trust that it worked. It only took a moment for the changes to prove that they happened.

Peter’s phone rang. He whipped it out at the speed of light and sobbed a little when he saw who it was. He didn’t hesitate to answer.

“Peter? Is that you? Can you please tell me what’s going on?” May’s voice sounded a little bit shaky. It took Peter a moment to find his voice.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s me… It’s a little bit of a long story.” He quickly wiped a tear from his eye and shuffled out of the room of avengers. He didn’t what them staring at him. They probably also had a few calls to make. Including one to Clint’s family.

“Why does your voice sound so weird? Are you sick?” May asked.

“My voice is not what you should be focusing on. A whole lot has happened. You might want to sit down…” He said as he did the same. He knew May would be distraught for missing out on his life but it’s not like she had a choice.

“Peter!” Carol’s voice came frantically from the other room. “Kid! Get in the quinjet!”

“Sorry May, I’ve got to go. I’ll explain everything later!” Peter knew that if Carol was panicking, something must have really gone wrong. He ended the call and jumped up to sprint outside to the quinjet. He could vaguely sense the rest of the avengers following him, with a little bit of emphasis on Rocket’s scampering on all fours like the animal he looked like.

Carol scrambled to the pilot’s seat and everyone, even those who could fly independently, filed into the dark jet.

“Okay, can someone tell me what the hell is going on now?” Peter groaned as he stood behind Nebula who was in the co-pilots chair.

“Sorry kid, I guess I got ahead of myself.” Carol sighed. “I just wanted to bring everyone back, I didn’t think that the black order would come back too.”

“Including Thanos or not including Thanos?” Peter’s voice shook and may have risen a few octaves.

“We don’t know, but their ships are gathering above New York City.”

“We still have the infinity stone right? You can just dust them can’t you?”

“The gauntlet is practically unusable. Even made of vibranium it couldn’t stand the strength of the infinity stones.”

“You absorbed the first snap, right? Maybe you could just hold the stones or something.” He said frantically as they took off and headed to the city at full speed. It would only take them a few minutes to get there.

“I almost couldn’t contain the power from the first one with the gauntlet. If I used them without it, I’d explode.”

“Then explode near their ships,” Peter suggested.

“I’ll think about it.” She snorted in response. “I can deal with the ships and hopefully the black order is easily knocked off of the playing board. We need people dealing with civilians.”

“I’ll go. My weapons didn’t do much to these guys last time…” Rhodey said.

“Me too.” Natasha nodded. “Unless you want me to sneak on their ship and take hold of their weapons. I can do that too.”

“Can I come?” Antman asked as his mask flipped on his head. “I can help with small stuff!”

“Sure, go for it,” Carol said, accidentally becoming the leader instead of the other captain. Neither of them really seemed to care.

Peter stayed quiet as they discussed plans, he thought this was all over… He thought Thanos was gone but apparently, he might not be and that scared the shit out of him. Only minutes ago he was pretty damn happy that they brought everyone back but now it could all be undone again and Peter really wasn’t ready.

Okay maybe he was panicking a little but not one was noticing so it didn’t matter. Maybe he was just overthinking it, they had everyone back, it wouldn’t be like last time.

“Spidey, were you listening?” Shuri seemed to realize that Peter was having a little bit of trouble but didn’t point it out.

“Uh, kinda. You should repeat it just to make sure…”

“We’re splitting up the stones since we can’t exactly use them. Carol is taking the power stone since she’s the only one that can hold it, I’m taking the mind stone because I might be able to figure it out, Cap gets time, yadda yadda yadda. You get the Soul Stone. The guardian of the soul stone said that it was different from the other stones so we need someone special to protect it. Someone fast and with a danger sense. Anyway, we’re about there. Just make sure the stones are split up so that we can defeat Thanos without them. Got it? Cool.” Shuri rambled at a speed that only Peter could follow along with.

“Cool.” Peter put on his web-shooters and activated the nanites inside them. The nanotech left their containment and covered his body in his suit. He had adjusted the design of the iron spider suit and even got vibranium added to the mix. There were several lines and points in the suit that had a slight indigo glow from the metal but Peter kept the bright red sections. For the aesthetic. It was the perfect amalgamation of starktech and Shuri’s Wakandan technology with Peter’s own designs sprinkled throughout.

Carol gave him the little orange stone. It seemed too small to be one of the most powerful items in the galaxy. Even through his suit, it was warm. He could feel it’s energy. He put it in a pocket in his web-shooter. Normally the place had extra web fluid but he forgot to refill it. It managed to be the perfect size, thank god.

Then he remembered that people were sacrificed for this little glowing rock. Hawkeye… Nebulas sister… This tiny stone definitely was different than the others. The other ones could be stollen, this one had to be paid, and the price was a little steep by Peter’s standards.

He really hoped that the soul stone wasn’t affected by inflation and that it was always a soul for a soul. Maybe a thousand years ago it was a different cool rock for the magic glowing stone. Like a geode from a national park gift shop for the soul stone. He realized that he may have zoned out a little.

The quinjet hovered above the city and the avengers got ready to jump out. Flyers automatically paired up with non-fliers. Nebula stayed in the cockpit to man the jet while Carol paired herself up with Natasha. Rhodey had Rocket snarling on his shoulder with a gun as big as he was.

One by one, the pairs of avengers leaped out of the quinjet. Except for Captain America, who didn’t need anyone to jump with, he didn’t even have a parachute. From what Peter knew about Steve, that was completely normal.

Peter put his arm safely around Shuri’s waist and jumped out. Shuri whooped like she was on a rollercoaster as if they weren’t going into battle with a resurrected intergalactic warlord. It’s not like he hasn’t taken her web-slinging before, in much safer circumstances.

The city was smoldering and civilians were running as far away as they could. Tripping on debris on the way. Peter spotted people stuck in a crumbling building and as if they had a neurological connection, he and Shuri went to work.

There was a reason they were paired up so often. They were an extremely fluid team that was constantly on the same page. They never had to tell each other what to do, they just knew what they were doing. Okay, they weren’t perfect but they had worked together for years and they knew each other pretty well. Shuri usually depended on Peter to catch her when she fell and he usually did.

This was why when Peter threw Shuri into the window of the building, she didn’t swear at him. With both of his hands free and Shuri in the building with the trapped people, he was able to make a large net with his webs. Shuri helped the family jump into the webbing for Peter to escort to the ground, to run as far away from the carnage as fast as they could.

They carried on like this, staying away from the main fight and helping everyone that needed to be helped until a flash of light caught Peter’s attention. He and Shuri were on a building only a few buildings away from where the flash came from.

It was him. It was Thanos. Below him was Steve, bloody and bruised and broken. He looked dead but Peter hoped otherwise. The glowing green gem hovered in between the mad titan’s massive fingers. One stone down… five to go. Peter shuttered at the thought. The time stone was one of the worst ones for him to get first. Well, any of them would be terrible for him to have but Time was a really bad start.

The purple Hitler alien grinned smugly and sent the black order out to find the rest of the stones. He did so, very dramatically.

“We need to split up,” Peter said urgently.

“That’s what I was going to suggest. We’ve already been risking it with two infinity stone so close together. I wouldn’t be surprised if that asshole can smell them like a dog.” She hissed. She took a precious moment that they could’ve spent running by giving him an urgent kiss. “For luck?” she suggested as she jumped off of the roof. Peter rolled his eyes but started web-slinging the opposite way. He could already tell that he would need that good luck.

For the next half hour, everything was so chaotic that Peter wasn’t sure he could perceive it all. He was pretty sure that he pulled someone from under the debris of a collapsed building, he saved a kid from space Voldemorts telepathic attacks that were missing whatever avenger he was currently after.

One by one, Thanos collected the stones, whether through his minions or himself. He took down each avenger, one at a time. If they had a stone or not. They lost Space, Reality, Mind, and Power. Peter became the last Avenger with an infinity stone. He became the last avenger standing.

When he saw the yellow flash of light, he knew Shuri was caught and he stopped whatever he was doing. He cried out a few choice expletives, Hoping that the bastard had only taken the stone and not her life.

Peter was the last one left. If Captain Marvel couldn’t kick this guys ass, there was no way that he could. Everyone was down except for him. That was a lot of pressure. Not many things could distract him from what was happening in front of him but something managed.

There was a burning pain through his wrist, where he hid the soul stone. It didn’t distract him long, he could ignore it for a minute. But he had to do something. He was the only one that could do something.

So he stepped out into the light and let his nanite mask retract. He wanted his face to show. He wanted to breathe the burning air and he wanted to show Thanos that he wasn’t afraid. This was odd because he had been scared to death of Thanos for half a decade, to a point where he had panic attacks over it, but now, all he felt was rage. A hot burning rage that ignited his veins.

He snuck around the broken city in complete silence. His plan could only work if he had the element of surprise. He couldn’t go against all of the black order and Thanos at once. After an eternity of obsessively controlling his breathing and every movement he made, he was in position. He was right behind Thanos.

He took a breath. A moment to collect his thoughts before shit went down and he was going to get hurt. In… and out... In … and out. He lept into action.

In a flash, he flipped over the titan and grabbed blindly at the gems already in the gauntlet. Good news, he managed to get one. Bad news, it was the power stone and Thanos grabbed him by the throat before he was able to get away. His arm burned with the violet energy as Thanos inspected him with a chuckle that only a bad guy could utter.

“They gave a child the soul stone?”

“I know I look young but come on, I don’t look that young.” He wheezed and wasted what little breath he had. His arm still burned but it was fading, it was as if the soul stone and the power stone were canceling each other out.

“It is impressive how long you were able to evade us, but my will is inevitable, the fight is done now. Give me the stones or I will rip them from your corpse.” The titan said calmly as if he was actually giving Peter the choice and not threatening to murder him.

“I don’t think I will.” Peter rasped. “Jesus Christ, if you let me breathe I might be able to actually talk to you… is this normally how negotiations work with you?” Peter noticed his fist holding the power stone and in the same hand as the soul stone was starting to heat up. Not burning destructively like it was before, but with power that was starting to course through him.

Thanos tightened his grip and raised Peter to the sky, cutting off his air and displaying him thousands of feet in the air. That’s when he started to hear a distantly familiar noise. Like a sparkler on the fourth of July multiplied by a million. He could see golden sparks out of the corners of his eyes. Thanos’s expression tightened but he didn’t react to the portals that Peter knew were starting to appear on top of buildings around him.

“Kid?” A painfully familiar voice yelled from somewhere behind him. He was starting to blackout, his lungs begged painfully for air but he couldn’t even gasp. “Let go of him!”

Peter smiled in between dry gasping like a fish out of water. He saw his fist glowing the orange of the soul stone with a fiery intensity. He closed his eyes and reached out to the soul stone. He finally understood. The little glowing rock was alive. The Soul was the most alive thing in the universe. And it was just as angry as Peter was.

Peter’s vision went white. Not because Thanos had successfully choked him to death, but because of the blast. The energy from the soul stone in contact with the power stone caused a concentrated white-hot explosion that didn’t even affect Peter. He wasn’t blown back, he just landed on the roof of the building as Thanos and the black order all around him were blown away with ease.

He frantically turned around, desperately hoping to catch a glimpse of Tony but his spider-sense went off before he could see his long lost mentor. He jumped off the skyscraper before a blast of energy could catch him off guard.

The soul stone led him to the fallen avengers which were all thankfully, not dead. Peter reached out his hand and the cloudy orange energy lazily floated into their bodies like fog. Wounds faded and gasps of breath echoed from around them. Once Peter knew they were okay, he left.

He swung up to a vacant rooftop and took his first full look at the reinforcements. There were at least four armies, the Wakandan army led by T’Challa, The Asgardian Army led by Valkarie, a mess of aliens behind the resurrected guardians of the galaxy and a few hundred wizards in matching robes, led by Doctor Strange. That wasn’t even including all of the undusted avengers and other heroes that stood at the front lines.

Then, Peter saw a glint of red fly out of the corner of his eye and smiled as he turned his head towards it. Moments later, Tony landed in a fresh bleeding-edge suit, his helmet melted back faster than Peter thought that it could.

“Hey, Mr. Stark. It’s been a little while.” Peter was staying cool for now but he was so close to crying. Tony looked exactly like he did before, maybe a little smaller but that was probably on Peter’s side. He did grow a few inches over the years.

“Peter? Is that really you? You look so… mature.” The man joked and raised his eyebrow.

“I better be, It’s been five years after all... You have been gone for a hot second.” Peter grinned, just glad to see Tony alive and in front of him. He could hear Tony’s heartbeat and it was the most beautiful sound.

“Five years? That’s why you’re so tall.” Peter laughed at Tony’s reaction and couldn’t restrict himself any longer, he hugged his old man.

“I missed you… you don’t even know…” It took a moment but Tony hugged back, just as tightly.

“Thank god someone did, That strange guy seemed rather annoyed that I was with them on Titan.”

“Wait, shit,” Peter pulled back from the hug, “We’re in the middle of a fight. Hugs later okay, the big bad guy still has four singularities that are super powerful by themselves.”

“Yeah, that sucks. Want a piggyback ride to the middle of it?” Tony offered as his helmet folded back on.

“Sure.” Peter shrugged. Moments later, he stood on Iron Mans back like he was a magic carpet. Moments later he dove off to confront Thanos again. This time, he was aware of the power that he held.

The only thing life really needed was a soul, and Peter had the essence of the soul in his hand. No time, no reality, no mind would change the fact that he was in control of life. That’s why it was the only stone that needed a sacrifice, that’s why it required the ultimate sacrifice. Because it was more powerful than the power gem. It was alive and it was angry. It had a will and a connection to every living thing. Including Thanos.

Thanos, in all his strength and intelligence, was not immune to the soul stones rage. No time, no space, no reality, no mind could save him.

It was almost disappointing how easy it was. So anticlimactic. The raging energy ate through the titan like he was paper in a flame. The armor didn’t matter, the stones didn’t matter. In moments, he was gone. After Thanos was defeated, the black order was taken down easily.

It was over. It was finally over. Everything was back to normal.

***

Okay, maybe not back to normal but families were reunited, friends were back from the dead and every other problem seemed pretty minuscule. That’s why, after everyone had a nap, the Avengers had a massive party at the compound.

Everyone’s families were invited, May was there, Carol joyfully hung out with her cat goose, Maria, Monica, and Nick Fury, Sam Wilsons mom was there, she even took the time to make cookies, the Wakandan royal family was there and literally hundreds more people. Everyone was glad to be alive and there was an incredible amount of catching up that needed to be done.

Both T’Challa, May, and Tony were pretty stunned to see Shuri and Peter together but after a moment of thought, it really made sense.

Rocket was crying as he hugged a tree teenager and denied the crying bit. He also seemed happy that the rest of his friends were alive, except Nebula’s sister but most of his friends were undusted.

Thor was still kind of glum but a few conversations with Professor Hulk and Valkarie got him laughing heartily. His family may be gone but he still had his friends.

Peter reunited with Ned and MJ, which was weird at first because he was older than them, and MJ didn’t know that he was Spider-Man, she suspected but she didn’t really know. It didn’t take long for them to realize that Peter was still Peter even though he was a little taller now. He was still the same nerd who had to refrain from giving away Star Wars spoilers from movies and TV shows they didn’t know existed.

It wasn’t all good though, while Ned and MJ took advantage of being around every superhero they had ever idolized, May lowkey started flirting with Carol, and Tony was being hogged by Pepper and Happy, Peter stook in a corner, still trying to accept that everything was fixed.

Even though everyone was back now, he still felt odd. He guessed that everything didn’t just suddenly resolve after everyone was brought back to life. The snap didn’t erase what had already happened. Peter had still spent five years separated from all of his friends and family. He had spent so much time mourning only to get everyone back years later. Those feelings didn’t just disappear.

It felt like a dream that they were all back. His mind sending him a reminder of what they looked and sounded like but he knew they were real. He could hear their heartbeats and laughs across the room. They were alive and Peter was so happy, they missed so much.

Peter had changed while they were gone, he was still Peter, he was just more traumatized and more withdrawn. He had grown but he was still the same. He still liked to hang upside down to nap and he was still bad at cooking but not baking. He was just taller and more in tune with his powers and diagnosed with a panic disorder.

In the long run, those changes wouldn’t matter, at least not to people who truly cared. It would just take them a few weeks to get back into the flow of normal life with the people they thought they lost.

It was like half of the universe was Captain America-ed for five years where literally everything changed. Earth became part of the universe, known to other planets as a complete powerhouse instead of an easy steal for some galactic empire. There were more humans in space than ever before and the snap affected everything. Ecosystems, culture, interplanetary and international relations, governmental control, and practically every aspect of normal human life was changed forever.

Peter was shaken out of his thoughts with Shuri handing him a plate full of deserts. He immediately bit into a cookie.

“Something on your mind?” She asked as she stole the cookie from his hand. He didn’t even react.

“Yeah, I know everything’s all fixed and everyone is back, but I don’t know, it feels weird.” He shrugged and grabbed another treat from the plate, knowing that the cookie was lost.

“I know, a lot happened in five years. We already mourned them and cried for them, and poof, they’re back. It’s not bad it’s just, weird.” She nodded.

“I just don’t feel like the same person that they all knew. Like for them, it’s been five seconds and for us, it’s been five years.”

“Does it matter? You are you. No matter your age or what you’ve been through. People change and grow and they just have to get used to who you are now.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I can’t turn back time to be sixteen again, I definitely don’t even want to. I like the me that I am now, but it’s not the same as my friends and family know. Whatever, this is a party, not therapy.”

“That is true, it is time to avoid our problems like there’s no tomorrow!”

And they did.

***

It was three in the morning and Peter was still awake. Not because he wasn’t tired, he definitely was, but because he was afraid of what would come when he closed his eyes. Instead of sleeping, he was in Tony’s lab. He had spent so much time there during the five years of missing his mentor.

Working always helped, it kept him focused. It was calming and it came naturally for him. He played music in the background that was everything from comedy bands to musicals to modern rock and classic rock. It was so much easier to avoid his problems than deal with them.

“Hey Friday, turn down the music, I need to talk to you.” He said while he was pacing and not working on anything at all.

“Of course. What do you want to talk about?” The AI replied cheerfully. She seemed a lot happier since Tony returned.

“I think it’s time to change your primary user back to Tony. He’s alive again so the ‘EDITH’ protocol should be reset. That also means to give back the trust and all that. I can’t rely on my inheritance anyway…” He rambled.

“I’m sorry Peter but I cannot do that. Boss locked the ‘Old Man’ protocol for his retirement. He wants to keep ‘EDITH’ in place.”

“I mean he’s not dead so why would he keep it?”

“It’s getting a little late kid,” Tony spoke from behind Peter. He turned to the man and shrugged.

“Not a kid. I’m old enough to drink but it doesn’t even do anything so that sucks.”

“Believe me, that’s a good thing. You don’t even get hangovers?”

“No, I can’t even get high dude. Weed is useless.” He sighed. Tony laughed.

“You should seriously go to bed though it’s been a pretty long day.”

“I couldn’t even if I wanted to.” Peter pouted.

“Poor baby.” Tony practically dragged Peter out of the workshop, it had been a pretty long day.

“I’m a little too tall to be a baby.” Peter yawned.

“You’re always going to be my baby,” Tony said surprisingly fondly.

“I’m taller than you.”

“Not emotionally,” Tony noted. Peter snorted in response as they wandered to his bedroom. In the five years of living there, it had barely changed. There were still three Star Wars posters on the wall and the desk was still a mess. The only thing that really changed was the comforter on the queen-sized bed. It had a little flying Iron Man pattern on it and little arc reactors. It used to be a solid scarlet.

“I love you, you know that right? I didn’t get to tell you before and I never want the opportunity to slip away ever again. You’ve been like a dad to me and I could never ask for anyone better. Shit, don’t tell Ben that…” Peter embraced Tony before he left for the night. Tony’s hand instinctually combed comfortingly through his kid’s hair.

“I love you too kid. It’s been rough for you lately but it’s okay now. You saved the universe, not many people can say that.”

“I know right, what are the perks of that? Do I get free food a McDonald’s or something? I mean Jesus got several holidays for saving mankind in some indefinable way, will my birthday become like a day off of school or something?” Peter joked as he stepped back.

“Now that’s an idea… who do you contact for making a holiday…”

“Okay no, don’t do that. Don’t you dare.” Peter said in a serious tone.

“Fine, good night Spider-Jesus.” Tony started to head back to his own room with Pepper.

“I’m not the one that came back from the dead, whatever. Good night Iron Jesus.” He sighed and flopped into bed. He was out like a light in moments. Even if he had a nightmare, he would always wake up to something better than any dream he could conjure. And that was enough.

#webclaws #irondad #endgame fix it #infinity war fix it #MCU fic #queen shuri #black panther shuri

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hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger · 5 years

Text

The Amazing Spider-Man: Mayhem in Manhattan Audiobook Thoughts

Marv Wolfman and Len Wein deliver a problematic that’s perhaps more interesting to talk about than actually experience for yourself.

Plot synopsis

As is standard for these types of post for me, I’m copying over a plot synopsis I found elsewhere to save myself time, and because they do a better job than I could. I edited it for a few reasons and the unedited synopsis, along with their review can be found here.

Allen Huddleston was the accountant for a small-time gangster. He worked his way to the top of the organization. His company merged with a legitimate oil company and his career and fortune soared. Then one day, a man made him an offer he had to refuse.

Because of his refusal, this individual – showing signs of superhuman powers, threw Huddleston from his 50-story apartment…

…Spidey finds Huddleston’s body and is…blamed for the murder.

Meanwhile, there is a meeting of the presidents of the 8 largest oil companies in the US. This same bad guy, hidden by a screen, told the eight that they must buy oil from him during the next year. Their oil has been irradiated and rendered useless. By the time the oil can be cleaned up, the year will have passed. This individual – known through the novel as the Master Planner until his real identity is revealed – is set to make millions.

While Spidey investigates the death of Huddleston he finds a taped telephone conversation with Huddleston and the Master Planner. Spider-Man finds that the murder is connected to a manipulation of the eight US oil companies. This leads to some of the Master Planner’s moles in the other oil companies. The Master Planner sets a trap for Spider-Man. There, the Master Planner reveals his real identity.

As the novel progresses, we meet regulars Mary Jane [Watson], Glory Grant, Joe Robertson and good old J Jonah Jameson. At first Triple-J is pleasant to others and happy that Spider-Man is accused of murder. As the facts become clearer, he is back to his usual…self – brusque, short-tempered and kvetching…He and Robbie investigate the mystery of the eight US oil company executives meeting in secret...At the end he confesses to Robertson why he REALLY dislikes Spidey – what about the REAL heroes who work to better mankind every day. “Who do you think is under that mask?” Robbie says. “A man, just like you.”

To add to this synopsis the climax transpires on a drilling platform where Doc Ock has the 8 oil men gathered up. Spidey uncovers a diary that has Ock’s whole plan committed to paper, and though it is destroyed, hearing the details is enough to clear his name as far as JJJ and Robbie are concerned (they are on the platform too). Doc Ock tries to escape with what amounts to a Scooby-Doo style latex mask which Spidey sees through fairly quickly and their battle resumes. When it’s over Doc Ock has seemingly perished in an inferno as the oil platform is set ablaze.

Out of concern for May’s health Peter throughout the novel seriously considers retirement but relents at the end. He plays a web-related prank on Jonah making everyone in the Bugle laugh. Close curtain.

Sorry it’s not as good as other synopses I’ve found but it’s the best I could find.

Context

This novel was released in March 1978 and, according to the information I found, was published when Len Wein’s run on ASM (ASM # 151–180) was nearing its end and not too long before Marv Wolfman would take the helm in ASM #182). Based upon Marvel.com’s publication dates, the novel would’ve been released between ASM #177-179. It’s unknown (and in my view highly unlikely) if Wein or Wolfman wrote this with the intention of being canonical. If read in conjunction with the then recent issues of Wein’s run it plays very much like most Spidey novels (especially the ones from the 1990s) wherein it takes place in a vaguely contemporary status quo within necesarilly marrying itself to any specific recent events. However how you perceive the novel in terms of being a Spider-Man story changes depending upon whether you look at it from the perspective of canon or as it’s own entity.

This was the first ever Spider-Man novel and also the only definitively canonical one (due to a direct reference in Wolfman’s ASM #186).

Obviously the standards for comics back then were not as realistic as they became later, and indeed the general craftsmanship quality wasn’t as high either. Perhaps more importantly we need to bear in mind Spider-Man’s place within collective pop culture osmosis at the time.

By this time Spider-Man’s exposure to the mass public merely extended to the (by then long since cancelled) 1966 Spidey cartoon, the (then recent but not particularly successful) 1977 live action TV show and a long running skit as part of the educational kids show the Electric Company (which had ended the year before).

What I’m trying to say is that whilst today most everyone on the planet could rattle off Spidey’s powers, his association with the Bugle and at least a few supporting characters and villains, back in 1978 the average person at best might be able to recognize the character, name his secret identity and list off most of his powers.

This is important to bear in mind when discussing the novel because, though it is canon, it doesn’t take audience familiarity for granted. If you are an old hand with Spidey a lot parts of the novel are going to feel like going through the motions as Spidey is framed once again, Spidey wants to quit once again, Spidey gushes about Aunt May, etc. There is even practically a whole chapter dedicated to recapping Peter’s origin.

But then again, this novel wasn’t written for the small number of people already familiar with the character but for a wider audience who weren’t. As such it’s fair game to retread this material and play stuff that’d be obvious to comic fans (like Doc Ock’s identity) as mysterious.

If I were to be kind I’d say it was because Wein and Wolfman wanted to give readers a broad idea of what Spider-Man’s deal is, and the typical ins and outs of your average Spider-Man adventure. Were I to be less kind I’d argue they retread old ground to make completing this job easier on themselves, although admittedly the central plot isn’t one I believe had ever been done in Spider-Man before.

That being said, even within the context of the novel certain elements get brought up repeatedly to the point of them becoming tedious, Aunt May being chief among them.

Finally, though I admit to have not researched them extensively, the novel touches upon then contemporary social/economic/political issues. The one of most note is the 1973 oil crisis. Long story short, there were fuel shortages due to events transpiring in the Middle East that obviously caused financial and maintenance troubles for America (and other regions of the world). There was another oil crisis in 1979 so it’s possible people (like Wein and Wolfman) were seeing the writing on the wall and including the topic in this novel. Obviously these events don’t directly impact the book nor are there direct allegories but the subject matter of the book makes it more likely than not that the oil crises were a source of inspiration.

There are no references I can recall to Middle Eastern people (and in fact exactly 3 people of colour in the whole book, Robbie, Randy and Glory) so Doc Ock and his scheme could be viewed as symbolic of the Middle East’s actions (deliberate or otherwise) in creating a fuel crisis. If this was intentional it doesn’t quite work as, to my understanding of the oil business, the oil companies he’s blackmailing were concerned with providing fuel for cars and other such vehicles, not for everything. As such the victims of Ock’s scheme would chiefly be vehicle owners (which most people in New York are not) and chiefly the oil company owners.

Now a fuel shortage even just for vehicles would have impact on a lot of good people, like everyone who ever needed an ambulance or fire truck to show up quickly. This makes Spider-Man’s lack of caring about the blackmail rather selfish, short sighted and out of character. But at the same time the story does frame it more as the oil companies being inevitably forced to take up Ock on his scheme and lose billions of dollars so Peter’s indifference to them makes more sense, especially when one considers he didn’t know Ock was involved at that time. However this is also the biggest reason for why the possibly/probably intentional connection drawn between this scheme and the oil crisis falls apart. Not only is it not truly analogous to the real life crisis but it also frames the primary victims as uber rich dickheads who will become slightly less uber rich for one year as a result of this.

Even by 1970s standards that’s a failure in reader investment because literally only other uber rich dickheads would have any sympathy.

Less significantly New York’s financial troubles coupled with a 25 hour black out in 1977 and high crime rates led to a feeling within and outside of New York of the city being a place beyond redemption.

Broadly this perception was the fuel for a lot of super hero stories in the 1970s and 1980s (like Frank Miller’s Daredevil run) and for this novel, whilst it isn’t strictly speaking the main concern, the idea of New York being stuck in a rut and a tough place to make it forms a backdrop for the story. There are references to how NYC is a place you need to survive and in doing so it becomes part of you. Though they emphasis the decay and the fact that the city is not in great shape, Wolfman and/or Wein display a certain amount of pride in the city through Peter Parker. This is fitting for the character, not just because he’s always resided in NYC, nor because the real NYC eventually adopted Spidey as one of their unofficial mascots, but because NYC as a city is tailored to Peter’s character. In truth it’s integral in defining his identity and the one place on Earth that offers an environment designed to optimize his super powers (how many other places have that many tall buildings in such a close proximity?).

From pictures to prose and the lack of personal stakes

According to the bibliographies I was able to find, this was Len Wein’s first ever prose novel and Wolfman’s second, so their degree of skill of experience with the format isn’t on the same level as say Jim Butcher’s Spidey novel.

That being said, the story wasn’t badly communicated through the prose. However, you can tell that these guys’ forte is in a visual medium as the scenes were primarily action orientated and all about trying to paint a clear picture in your mind about what’s happening. They usually succeeded though there were a few times my mind drifted off and on occasion instances where I was wondering why Spidey doesn’t just do this or that to get out of dodge; admittedly that might have more to them dropping the ball with Spider-Man’s skillset than anything else.

The novel in general shares the tone of your typical mid-late 1970s Spidey story, albeit with a greater emphasis placed upon investigation and a longer plot. In fact had this story been a comic book it could’ve passed for an original graphic novel (before Marvel was regularly doing those), albeit one with an only slightly more complex tone. Really the sinister opening chapter with Doc Ock along with the details the plot goes into as far as the investigation are concerned are just about the only things that would’ve have occurred in a then standard issue of ASM or Spec. Other than that it’s very similar to a Spidey yarn from the time, which unfortunately includes some unsophisticated and even dodgy writing.* Case in point Doc Ock’s incredibly convenient journal detailing his evil scheme and his Scooby-Doo style disguise that doesn’t really do much but pad out the story.

However those complaints pale in comparison to the most central problem at the heart of the story.

This is not a Spider-Man story truly about Peter Parker.

Even in the primordial days of Spider-Man in the early 1960s, Lee, Ditko and Romita knew that Peter Parker’s personal life was at least half as important as his hero activities. They had already mined the idea of the two sides of his life negatively impacting one another and in multiple instances colliding. Perhaps the most famous examples are The Master Planner Trilogy (wherein Aunt May’s life depends upon Spider-Man confronting Doc Ock’s gang) and ASM (wherein a party with the supporting cast is crashed by Kraven the Hunter).

The problem with this book as a central story is that it places the emphasis upon Spider-Man moreso than it does upon peter Parker. Even in 1978, merely referencing Aunt May, his origin and giving brief appearances by Mary Jane, wasn’t going to cut it. The subplot about Peter deciding to quit also feels rather unearned and would not be particularly impactful to most readers unfamiliar with the character.

For old hands at Spidey like me him wanting to quit is tedious and was something already in need of a fresh angle even in 1978 (which this novel absolutely doesn’t provide). But for newer fans or people introduced to Spider-Man through this novel it lacks punch as you’ve spent inadequate time depicting Peter’s everyday life and super hero career for his decision o give it all up to mean much. It’s a little like how Batman in BvS: Dawn of Justice having lost his way means little considering we knew so little of what he was like before that. It doesn’t help that Peter’s decision to not quit is flippant, I can’t even remember how or when it happens, just that it does. It might even have been off panel. Spider-Man No More it wasn’t.

The whole subplot was rather poorly handled and felt inserted for padding or out of obligation. But that is also one of the three meager things that offer any personal stakes for Peter in this story. One of the others is that Jonah and Robbie eventually become endangered by the scheme because they are investigating it, but even that is much more connected to Spider-Man than Peter Parker and Pete doesn’t even know about it for most of the story. The third attempt at personal stakes is Spider-Man’s false accusation of murder, which is about as well worn as ‘Spidey wants to quit’ as a trope and one that is even less laced with personal drama. In fact most of these personal stakes could be mitigated if Peter simply went ahead and DID retire and his personal life would improve as a result.

Yes we are TOLD his personal life suffers because he s Spider-Man but we are never really shown it beyond injuries to his body and there are no relatable normal life stakes in play for him. It’s just that if he dies, no one will take care of Aunt May. That’s it.

Okay fine, technically an argument with Jonah leads to him losing his job with the Bugle and in theory being blacklisted from other jobs but like…if he’s got the only Spidey photos in town are competing newspapers REALLY going to turn him down? And it’s not like photography was his long term career path at this point anyway. The novel doesn’t even ruminate all that much on the conflict, putting much more emphasis upon his concerns for May.

Compare all that say Spider-Man: Forever. There Peter being Spider-Man causes Peter’s peers to think him a coward, his friend is jailed, he believes Gwen and Flash are growing close because he isn’t around and because he is thought of as a coward, his stress causes him to lash out at Flash and in turn lash out at criminals in costume. Oh and he’s trying to rescue his friend/teacher Curt Connors and his family. I appreciate that novel was written decades after this one but everything I just described comes from it’s adaptation of a 1960s Stan Lee story.**

I’ve not revisted all of Wein and Wolfman’s stories carefully enough to deduce if this was par for the course back then, but to my recollections it wasn’t and common sense would dictate it’s not great writing in general. Even for a thriller or action orientated story, personal stakes ramps up the readers’ investment. Considering the comics had been doing this for years beforehand there really isn’t much of an excuse.

What’s even more baffling regarding the decision is that the switch in media you would think would make the need for personal stakes more relevant not less.

Let’s face it, action is almost always better when conveyed through visuals rather than prose and that is especially true for super heroes considering they were specifically designed for a visual medium. It’s a rare and very honed skill to make action really exciting in prose format, and Wein/Woflman are no Horowitz or Fleming. Whilst they can clearly convey what is happening well enough, I kept thinking how much better most of this would be as a comic book or film.

Given the nature of the character and limitations/strengths of the medium, it would be natural to emphasis the personal life stakes, introspection and soap opera elements innate to Spider-Man over the action adventurer aspect of who he is. This is precisely why Peter David’s ‘Five Minutes’ story from The Ultimate Spider-Man anthology is perhaps the strongest example of Spidey prose fiction. I’m not saying action and adventure should be at 0% here, but the ratio for this novel is at best 90% and that just doesn’t work very well.

I speculate this is perhaps partially due to Wein and Wolfman taking cues from Sherlock Holmes, James Bond and pulp novels; Holmes and Bond are even name checked in the novel. Such books have commonalities with the super hero genre and in some cases such novel characters contributed elements innate to the super hero genre. Batman for instance has Zorro and Holmes imbedded in his formative DNA.

Indeed, if you examine the physical ‘Mayhem In Manhattan’ book at face value it certainly reminds me of those types of action thriller novels and pulps. So in theory doing a super hero novel with inspiration from those books makes a lot of sense. But the problem is that, whilst the earliest 30s and 40s super heroes might’ve evolved from those types of characters, by the 60s-70s times had changed. Spider-Man and the early Marvel pantheon, whilst still super heroes, are a generation removed from the ones inspired by the likes of the Shadow, Holmes or Zorro, existing more as a reaction against their predecessors if anything. Because of this the emphasis upon action and adventure at best feels like it merely captures part of who Spider-Man is and simply dabbles in the other, perhaps more important, part (i.e. Peter Parker).

The Wein or the Wolfman

An interesting question to ask regarding this novel is to what extent it is the product of Len Wein and to what extent it is Wolfman’s. For all we know they actively collaborated throughout the writing process. But for all we know one might’ve provided the other with an outline the other actually fleshed out into a full novel.

Personally speaking I am inclined to believe that it was the former and that this book is more a product of Wolfman than Wein.

My reasons for this are circumstantial but hear me out.

Okay so, for starters when the book came out Wein was busy writing and editing ASM and was very likely doing work on ASM back when the book was being written. Secondly it was in Wolfman’s own ASM run that the novel became canonized. Thirdly the novel also features the great power/great responsibility mantra, which might seem insignificant, but in the comics to my recollection the Wolfman was the first guy to actually repeat the mantra since AF #15 (unless one counts the short lived Spec magazine). This makes this novel one of the earliest times that the mantra was ever repeated in a Spider-Man story.

Fourthly, the novel hammers Peter’s affection for Aunt May over and over and over again. Granted, Wolfman was neither the first nor the last person to do that. But he did do it to a bigger extent than Wein ever did in his run having Peter practically shed tears over how sweet Aunt May was. Wein might’ve used May and emphasized Peter’s affection for her, but nowhere near to the same extent. Wein, whilst giving May one of her more notorious health scares, didn’t make as big a deal of her health as Wolfman did in his run and her health is brought up more than once here as a rationale for Peter’s retirement.

Finally, I know Wolfman has an affection for hard boiled crime stories (his mid-late 80s Superman work conveys that) which this novel is definitely cut from and indeed the tone of this story is somewhat reminiscent of another Doc Ock story he did in ASM Annual #13 (released in 1979).

So I feel the lion’s share of the credit (for good or ill) for this novel should go to Wolfman. Although the fact that 2 people worked on this could explain certain inconsistencies and discrepancies in the novel. One such example (and frankly an unforgivable mistake for any Spidey writer to make) is Peter’s claim that he designed his costume to scare criminals only to later in the novel give his origin and (correctly) explain that he actually designed it to have show biz spectacle.

Another example arguably applies to the two main ladies of Peter’s life. Namely…

Aunt May and Mary Jane

At one point early in the novel Peter is listing off the price he pays for being Spider-Man. Among his complaints is that he has ‘no real love’. However this is in spite of referencing Aunt May in the same passage and MJ having appeared earlier in the novel.

In the former case one might argue that Peter was referring to romantic love and in the latter case the intent might’ve been that, whilst they were dating, he and MJ were not in love with one another.

More problematically is how both characters are handled in this story.

Now I’m not suggesting that a Spider-Man story is obliged to give Aunt May or MJ significant play, or more play than other supporting characters (Jonah and Robbie are definitely the most important secondary characters in this novel).

Heck, back in 1978 Mary Jane lacked the presence within the Spider-Man mythology that she has now, they’d only been dating for like 3-4 years by the time this novel was published; as far as anyone knew she was merely the latest Spidey lover not the endgame. That being said, her role as (at the time) the Spider-Man girlfriend did entitle her to a certain amount of importance at least on the level of Jameson. But okay, this was aiming to be a an action thriller/detective/pulp story, so giving focus to two newsmen over the girlfriend or elderly mother of the lead character makes a certain amount of sense if that’s what you are going for (even if a Spidey novel should probably be more than that).

The story doesn’t demand their inclusion but since this is the first ever Spidey novel, maybe Wein/Wolfman felt it a disservice to not include them as part of giving readers a taste of what makes Spider-Man tick.

With all that said though both characters would have probably been better off omitted from this novel completely given how they were used.

They both got the shaft but in noticeably different ways. Outside of an overwrought dream sequence May literally never appears and is merely referenced multiple times in annoying internal dives into Peter’s mind. It’s rote stuff. Peter has to quit cos Aunt May. She’s so kind. She’s so frail. She’ll die if she finds out the truth. Blah blah blah.

It’s not just that established fans would likely roll their eyes over this stuff, but even new fans in 1978 would likely get fed up with Peter’s hang up over May. And so much of this stuff fails to connect for the simple reason that, for as much as we hear Peter think or talk about her, she never appears to speak for herself.

As tedious and cliché as Aunt May on her sickbed had become by 1978 at least in most of those stories she was physically present. She’s still a prop to motivate Peter but here she’s been reduced to the idea of a prop. Although 1970s Aunt May wasn’t a great character she still deserved better. The kindest thing I can say is that the reference to her having recent heart attacks synchs up with Len Wein’s final storyline on ASM.

As for Mary Jane it’s just insulting.

On the positive end of things MJ’s flirtatious personality traits are present. On the less than positive side of things…her function in the story is a very clunky vehicle to get Peter to the Bugle, which is baffling considering Peter works there anyway and MJ doesn’t.

The long story short is that she bangs on Peter’s door early in the morning because she was told by Glory Grant (or whoever) that there was a sexy new reporter at the Bugle that all the men were drooling over and that she was now partnered up with Peter. She’s clearly upset, but claims not to but wants to get things clear because she thought she and Peter had ‘an understanding’.

WTF does that mean? That they are exclusively dating? That they aren’t exclusive but need to tell one another or get permission if they want to see other people? It’s not at all explained and if they were just straight up dating there would be no need to be vague about it.

Perhaps this is partially due to the iffy nature of their relationship under Wolfman’s run. Conway left readers in little doubt that Peter and MJ were both exclusive and more importantly in love with one another. Wein’s run muddied the waters somewhat as he didn’t go back on what Conway established save two significant moments. One of those is when Peter wonders to himself that he isn’t sure about his relationship with MJ when after Conway’s run he absolutely should be sure. The other is when MJ dates Flash to get back at peter for ditching her.

Whilst you can No. prize both instances, the fact is Wein didn’t explicitly go back on Conway’s work but also apparently didn’t take their romance as seriously, nor did Wolfman seeing as he broke them up ASAP into his run then made sure it was permanent later on.

What I’m trying to say is Wein, whilst he did give the couple some interesting ups and downs, didn’t exactly live up to the promise handed to him by Conway and Wolfman straight up disliked the Peter/MJ romance for bullshit reasons.

So whilst it is possible that Wein and/or Wolfman were covering their tracks by referring to Peter/MJ’s relationship as ‘an understanding’, I’m much more inclined to think it was one of them (probably Wolfman) misunderstanding or deliberately undermining the relationship cos they suck.

And let’s talk about MJ’s portrayal here. I honestly don’t understand the logic here. MJ hears there is an attractive woman who will be working with Peter and…she is angry?...because Peter…didn’t tell her/is working with her at all??????????

Huh?

It comes off as a ‘Jeez wimmn amirite fellas’ moment. Like MJ is threatened by this sexy woman she’s merely heard about. Okay, maybe there were 1970s standards for dating or just workplace etiquette that 40+ years removed I’m in the dark about. But even back then, if a woman didn’t like the idea of her male partner working with another woman, jumping to anger or a presumption of romantic shenanigans seems really petty and insecure.

And frankly, seriously OOC for MJ even as she was established back then. Let’s put aside how she vowed to be less clingy back in the issue where Betty and Ned got married (which likely happened before this story). MJ isn’t the type to be threatened by the mere presence of a sexy woman. Yeah she competed with Gwen, but that’s the key word. She competed. MJ knows she’s highly attractive and wants to be with Peter so she’ll go for it, but here she feels insecure about a woman she’s literally just heard about merely working with peter. Did Ann Nocenti write this or something?

It’s asinine and either really contrived in order to get us to the Bugle or a really desperate way to crowbar MJ in as part of a checklist of Spidey elements that should be in this story.

It feels like something Silver Age Betty Brant (Wolfman’s favourite Spidey love interest FYI) would’ve done but with MJ just being comparatively more chill and understanding when she realizes she’s made a mistake. Which is another bit of circumstantial evidence supporting my theory that this is more Wolfman’s work than Wein’s. Wolfman had a reductive view of who MJ was (although he technically established her issues with divorce/commitment) which was very much stuck in the Silver Age. He swiped plenty of his run from Ditko era Spidey stories and literally wrote out MJ in order to have Betty Brant become Peter’s lover again. So I suspect he was imposing the archetypical unreasonable Silver Age girlfriend template upon MJ in this story but tweaking it in accordance to her more hip and loose persona. Essentially a Silver Age girlfriend dialed down to the most mellow level…which is still NOT what MJ was at the time.

She proceeds to tag along to the Bugle, support a joke where peter forgets the name of the sexy Bugle reporter and then apologise, subtly offer sex and leaves. She is then unmentioned for the rest of the book until the very last chapter where she amounts to a pretty face, a cheerful personality and vaguely the supportive girlfriend. And frankly all that is really overselling it, she hugs Peter and congratulates him and little else.

She might as well not be in that chapter or in fact this entire novel. The subplot about the sexy reporter doesn’t even go anywhere. It’s just a clumsy means to facilitate the introduction of the Bugle cast, the incredibly minor subplot about Peter losing his job and get the ball rolling on Peter’s investigation.

Call me nuts but couldn’t the story have achieved all that by having Peter himself just go to the Bugle for work, been told directly by Jonah he was being partnered up with someone against his will, etc?

And you wanna know the worst part?

This sexy reporter is apparently a previously unmentioned niece of JJJ…who we never see. Not only would meeting Jonah’s extended family have been an interesting novelty if nothing else, but if you are going to have a whole contrived plot revolve around this niece have her put in an actual appearance maybe????? It doesn’t even go anywhere, I was expecting her to show up at some point and she absolutely didn’t.

So yeah, the female characters in this novel get fucked over quite a bit, even ones we merely hear about. Hell the opening chapter makes multiple mention of how the gangster’s wife is ugly and unlovable.

Jonah and Robbie

As I said, Jonah and Robbie get more play in this novel and they are actually handled well.

By this point in time neither character had been exactly given three dimensions and I can’t recall even a subtle implication that Robbie knew Peter’s secret. Nevertheless both characters are on point for how they’d been defined by 1978.

Jonah is the blowhard with a major anti-Spidey agenda, Robbie is steadfastly moral and voice of reason counterbalancing him. Jonah’s rants are a highlight as usual with a memorable argument with a cab driver and an even earlier one with Peter regarding his niece; to the novel’s credit Peter fights back.

We see both men display street smarts and investigative skills as they methodically pursue the trail of Ock’s scheme right to its climax. The most stand out example of this is when Robbie pays a drunk to spill information, the scene being ripped straight out of a crime noir story.

Furthermore, Robbie shines when he helps Spidey out during his duel with Ock, the aftermath of which involves him also calling Jonah out for his psychosis where Spidey is concerned. I can’t recall exactly if the comics had by this point pinned down that Jonah was in fact a very good newsman but had a Spider-Man shaped blind spot. If not then this would be the first time in canon that idea was established and furthermore kudos to Wein and Wolfman for lightly fleshing Jonah out some by doing so. They then followed up by doubling down on Lee/Ditko’s proposed rationale for Jonah’s vendetta, having him verbalize to Robbie his resentment and jealousy towards the wall-crawler. However they soften him up by having Jonah be more upset that the attention Spider-Man garners overshadows the normal everyday heroes like cops and firefighters.

This is an interesting angle to approach Jonah from, even if it doesn’t really jive with the status quo of the novel wherein Spider-Man is clearly regarded as a public menace. Howe can he be a public pariah yet also someone people glorify at the expense of fire fighters?

This then precipitates some more interesting

There are also two noteworthy exchanges towards the end of the novel.

The former has Robbie succinctly skewer Jameson for allowing his hate-boner to blind him and acting as JJJ’s conscience, insisting he print the truth about Spidey’s innocence. This is followed by an over the top old timey dialogue about how Jonah is going to spin this to his advantage; It just goes to show how back then Jonah was more of a yellow journalist than the dignified newsman.

The latter has Robbie sings Spider-Man’s praises. Whilst it’s heartwarming for us old established fans to see Robbie express such respect towards Peter, in the context of the novel the scene has it’s problems. To begin with it is arguably overwrought and rather unrealistic in the context of the scene. More significantly it’s rather too blunt a way for Wein/Wolfman to essentially spell out to the readers why Spider-Man (in their view) is a great character and you should love him. It falls flat since newer readers would’ve only experienced Spidey in the course of this rather short novel anyway so the moment feels rather unearned, albeit much more applicable when you look at this in canon.

Also since Robbie is essentially implied to not know Peter is Spidey in the novel it feels odd to new readers that Robbie would be speaking this way, as though he knows Spider-Man to a much more personal degree. The novel even states Robbie I mostly indifferent towards Spidey a chapter or two earlier than this speech so it’s another example of the novel being inconsistent. The actual sentiments of the speech as they truly apply to Spidey can be discussed later.

Don’t be fooled. I’m not trying to say JJJ or Robbie were not great in this novel because perhaps more than anything they absolutely work.

Doc Ock

I don’t have a whole Hell of a lot to say about Doc Ock in this novel. Doc ock hadn’t really been given the meaty layers he’d get later on and by this point was Spider-Man’s #1 bad guy kind of by default. He was the most visually dynamic of Peter’s foes, the one that thematically had the greatest connection to him (aside from Norman, but he was dead) and had been the most recurring of Spidey’s foes.

He also doubled up as a mad scientist and a fighter meaning he was a character with a shade more versatility than knuckleheads like Sandman or clever yet weak opponents like Mysterio.

Wein/Wolfman use him fairly well here and you could argue this novel is a better Doc Ock story than Spidey story.

I said above that this novel likely takes cues from (among other things) James Bond novels and here Ock certainly echoes a Bond villain in his scheme, he even has a secret lair with death traps and hilariously a finely furnished room on an oil rig.

He’s described using effectively intimidating language. Wein/Wolfman interestingly avoids describing him as overweight and instead claims he’s stocky and strong, conveying a sense of power quite apart from his tentacles. When he and Spidey begin dueling at the end of the novel the novel really sells him as formidable and dangerous figure.

Perhaps the highlight of Otto’s characterization stems from his rant about how he spent years unrecognized for his genius. Whilst Doc Ock has always had an undercurrent of being driven by a desire for recognition, to my recollection this was perhaps the first time ever it was stated outright. It’s not much but it allows Ock to be a tad more than a one dimensional villain.

The primary weakness of his portrayal mainly stems from the mystery surrounding his identity. To any old hand at Spidey it’s incredibly obvious it’s Doc Ock very early into the novel and it becomes even more obvious as soon as he is identified as the Master Planner. This even creates some continuity problems due to Wolfman canonizing the novel. Given how momentous an event the MP Trilogy was in Peter’s life why would he fail to remember the Master Planner was a moniker used by Doc Ock? And if Otto is attempting to maintain secrecy why would he use an alias that is public knowledge anyway?

Hell now I think about it, why even bother with secrecy at all? Remember this was before the days of the internet and when surveillance technology wasn’t what it is today, so if what benefit would Otto have in disguising his voice or using an alias when trying to blackmail the oil tycoons? If anything, being upfront with them would surely be more intimidating.

Other weaknesses include his committing his plans (including a confession of murder) to a diary for plot convenience, his Scooby-Doo level disguise and conveniently (and repeatedly) verbally confessing to murdering Huddelston.

These issues are partially connected to another problem with the novel, that of padding.

Not so fantastic filler

In spite of its length the novel is weirdly padded out. For sure a lot of stuff to people who’re already fans of comic Spidey there is a lot of unnecessary stuff. But even having said that there is plenty of stuff to cut here.

The filler takes two dominant forms.

The first is stuff you would expect. The brief subplot regarding Otto’s diary doesn’t really serve the plot much as Otto destroys it pretty soon afterwards. It mostly exists just to cheaply inform Spidey of Otto’s scheme but there were much more elegant and effective ways for him to have learned about that. There is basically a brief video game side mission wherein Peter has to save an old blind man from being run over by a carjacker, all to desperately (and unsubtly) remind the readers of Uncle Ben’s death. There is a brief fight involving Jonah and Robbie verses their kidnappers, which at best might serve to set up Robbie’s bravery for when he helps Spidey out later. And I already mentioned all the stuff with Mary Jane.

The second and probably more annoying for of filler is the needless elaboration on bit characters. A random cop, a random security guard, a random tourist and a random criminal are among the several pointless characters who do not need names, let alone potted backstories regarding their future’s with the police force or their street names. Each one feels like something ripped from a noir novel but the only instance where this is effective is in the case of Alan Huddelston. He is the POV character for the first chapter and integral t the plot, so his murder nicely sets the tone, puts some pieces in place for the story and establishes a bit about Doc Ock. Everyone else though is not only cuttable but their inclusion made me outright dislike them.

I suspect the writers were so used to the faster pace afforded by comic books that they found their initial efforts for the novel coming up short hence these insertions.

Peter Parker’s Portrayal

Obviously the single most important thing when it comes to a Spider-Man novel is how it handles Spider-Man himself.

It’s a mixed bag.

At face value Wein/Wolfman seemingly capture Spidey circa the late 1970s. Descriptions of his movement clearly evoke comic images in your head.

His banter sounds authentic to the time period too, although his quips aren’t the greatest. They feel oddly old fashioned eve by 1970s standards although maybe that’s just me because I find Stan’s Spidey dialogue still holds up.

However ultimately this portrayal of Peter Parker falls flat, largely because it doesn’t strike a balance between earning the moments of pathos or emotion from newer readers and for older Spidey fans it’s very rote. Actually it’s more like it’s rote but it also gets stuff outright wrong.

A small example of this Peter’s agonizing to quite. Putting aside how that had been done to death even by 1978, the novel has Peter come off as rather whiney and it’s almost like it’s yelling at you to appreciate the novelty of a superhero who doesn’t ENJOY being a superhero. When Peter sought to quit even in the early days of the comics, Lee and Ditko earned it much more through the art and through conveying Peter’s constant uphill struggle. For newer readers though the first thing they read about Spidey is him in costume and complaining, already framed for murder. Most adaptations opt to either first set up Peter then introduce Spidey or open with standard Spidey action and then after establishing his normal life have it go to shit. Wolfman/Wein are in essence writing for a new audience who they think already know enough about Peter to care, when in reality they don’t and the audience that does care wouldn’t be impressed by recycling so many tropes of Spidey for this novel.

Another example is Peter’s complaining that he has no real love. This is baffling if you contextualize it into the comics canon because, hello…Gwen Stacy (who is never mentioned once in this novel even though her Dad died due to Doc Ock)and Mary Jane? Maybe this ties into Wein and/or (more likely) Wolfman’s over all problems in handling MJ in their runs, but like Peter undeniably is in love with Mary Jane by this point and knows she reciprocates. This feels more appropriate to a generalized idea of Spider-Man as opposed to the specific nuances of the canon character.

Undeniably though the single biggest example of mischaracterization comes from when Spider-Man suspends a suspect in a web high above the ground to make him squeal and then literally leaves him there. As in the guy has to carefully disentangle himself from the webbing and gradually inch his way back inside to safety. The novel never states Peter’s webbing lasts just 1-2 hours, but even if it was permanent, WTF man? Unless there was some extenuating circumstances Spider-Man would’ve leave the guy there.

I am not familiar enough with Wein’s wider bibliography, but that feels much more like a Wolfman thing. Wolfman’s work routinely involves tough guys beating the shit out of gangsters and this scene is ripped out of crime noir story. It’s another example of how I suspect Wein/Wolfman looked to precursors of the superhero genre for influence but it doesn’t really jive here.

Then of course we have the second act climax in Doc Ock’s lair. Guys…this is 100% a Master Planner Trilogy rip off.

Now in defence of this story, the cliché of ‘Spider-Man needing to use his willpower to lift something really heavy’ hadn’t yet become a cliché by 1978. In fact this may well have been the very first time somebody returned to that well in all Spidey media.

But here is the thing. As eye rolling as it has become to see that cliché again and again…this is probably the single worst example of it I have ever seen.

This isn’t an homage, this is basically an outright rip off.

You could argue JMS outright ripped this off too back in his Doc Ock/L.A. arc in ASM vol 2. But that story didn’t involve also going through a veritable laundry list of Spider-Man clichés as well.

For real this is a story where Spidey is framed for murder, Jameson is an irrational lunatic who ironically needs Spidey to save him, Peter angsts about Aunt May’s heart, contemplates retirement and ALSO needs to lift something really heavy.

How much of a rip off is this?

Well stop me if any of this sounds familiar. Spidey goes to the Master Planner’s secret lair, there he learns the MP is really Doc Ock. At the lair he survives several obstacles, then is buried under tons of debris and is in danger of drowning. But using his will power he frees himself.

The only real difference is Spider-Man is in danger of drowning because the tide is coming in not because he is underwater. Combined with Aunt May’s lack of immediate peril, Uncle Ben’s memory and the build up to this moment and you basically have a shittier version of the scene that undermines Peter’s character.

It comes off as rote because he’s dwelling on May’s fate if he dies (and how she’s so sweet and kind) for the umpteenth time in the novel. And because we’ve spent so little time with Peter as Peter (as opposed to Spider-Man) that emotional investment is lacking. The dialogue if placed in a different story could work, but having Peter think to himself ‘I’m Spider-Man!’ doesn’t mean much. It’s like if in the first ever Sherlock Holmes novel, Holmes saves the day by clenching his teeth and affirming his own identity. It’d falls as flat as when Cumberbach revealed he was Khan in Star Trek: Into Darkness.

More than this in the actual MP Trilogy Peter went through Hell BEFORE we got to this moment. He suffered a shitton before the single worst thing could happen to trip him up at the finish line. This comes out of nowhere and is dispensed with. He doesn’t evolve or change in response to the moment.

At best it’s just another injection of titillating peril to keep people interested, at worst it’s Wein/Wolfman indulging themselves by redoing the best Spider-Man story ever.

It’s not even the culmination or climax of the story either. Whilst the iconic scene in the original story was the start of the third part of the story, it was 100% the culmination of the saga over all. This? This is the second act climax, it’s the equivalent of when Spidey fucked up the ferry in Spider-Man: Homecoming. Except that at least had consequences, this was glorified filler.

Then we have Peter’s desire to quit. I’ve already talked about this a whole lot but one thing I didn’t touch on is something that happens after he recounts his origin.

Once Peter repeats his responsibility mantra he begins to follow up by claiming he’ll never forget his lesson.

Well putting aside the semantics of that because he obviously has quit multiple times in canon (ASM #50 comes to mind) isn’t he literally forgetting that lesson in this very novel by opting to retire?

The novel then continues to basically imply great responsibility naturally comes with great power. “Sure great responsibility comes with great power…” This is a small but significant thing to misinterpret. Spider-Man’s mantra isn’t about how great responsibility is part of the package when you get great power, it’s about how that power needs responsibility to temper it, to keep it in check.

That’s why the original quote (as Tom DeFalco and Ron Frenz have pointed out several times) is “with great power THERE MUST ALSO COME great responsibility.”

What Wein/Wolfman describe is the equivalent of just saying: “with great power COMES great responsibility”.

But it doesn’t.

That’s the entire point of Spider-Man’s origin. He had power, he didn’t use it responsibly, something bad happened. It’s also literally what Doc Ock is doing in this novel. He has power and abuses it, he doesn’t have any sense of responsibility and it causes harm.

The difference is small yet profound and what is ironic is that the majority of portrayals of Spidey use misquote even though they grasp the original sentiment. And yet here Wein/Wolfman get the correct quote but then follow it up with a misinterpretation in line with the misquote.

The novel continues by claiming Peter’s first responsibility had to be to himself and those he cared for.

Again, this is a small but profound misinterpretation of Spider-Man.

As far as Spider-Man himself is concerned yes his loved ones are his first responsibility (in terms of their wellbeing, obviously he’ll miss an engagement with them for the greater good) but not himself. Peter does not view his own well being as above what he does for innocent people as Spider-Man.

If a situation endangered Aunt May, himself and a stranger, his priorities would be May, the stranger, himself, in that order.

Wein and Wolfman are subtly demonstrating a big misreading of the character in this part of the novel, even if it is refreshing to hear Peter acknowledge himself and his loved ones as ONE of his major responsibilities and not irrelevant next to being Spider-Man.

Now in fairness, older stories under Stan did demonstrate Peter was willing to go into retirement for the sake of Aunt May (and thus by extension his other loved ones too), for example ASM #50. That same story saw Peter only come out of retirement when May was on the mend. The first time he seriously considered retirement (as opposed to throwing a teenage hissy fit like in ASM #3) was in ASM #18 when May was again seriously unwell. So there is a certain truth to what the novel is saying, the problem is May is not unwell in the novel. Spider-Man is planning on retiring simply because may MIGHT have another heart attack or he MIGHT die and be unable to take care of her which is literally the regular status quo of Spider-Man. Like he was doing this in ASM #1-100 so why the Hell is he now bleeting on about his responsibility to her and to alienating people who try to befriend him (which we see no evidence of in the novel, again, he’s literally dating MJ).

It’s another example of the novel being at odds with itself. This characterization contradicts things for established fans, but for newer ones it’s incredibly unearned.

The novel continues by having Peter say that if great power demanded great responsibility (which again isn’t what his mantra is about) then he’d give up that great power. This further cements Wein/Wolfman’s misinterpretation of Spider-Man because, hello, the point of his origin is that he had power and didn’t use it! The only way that Spidey giving up his great power works is if he is literally depowered, not simply choosing to not use it for fuck’s sake.

The whole passage in the book doesn’t even add up because Peter conditions his retirement upon both clearing Spider-Man’s name and bringing the Master Planner to justice…but why?

At this point in the novel all he knows is the Master Planner is stealing money from billionaires who themselves steal from the common man and who’s losses will not (the novel makes clear) impact him or anyone lacking a car. So if Peter is of a mindset to retire and doesn’t get that having his powers means he’s obliged to use them to help others, then why is he choosing to use them to help these douchebags and clear the name of an identity he’s giving up anyway?????????????

There are, of course, other discrepancies in Peter’s characterization too, noticeably in his account of his origin story. For starters he uses Stan Lee’s ASM #50 revision that Peter went sought to cash in on his powers specifically to pay back May and Ben when in AF #15 he is way more selfish than that. Additionally the origin claims Peter turned down an invitation to join his peers at the movies, preferring to go to his fateful science exhibit. This is a tiny but significant change, as originally Peter invited his peers to the experiment and was rejected, rather he rejecting them. It’s an important distinction as it made Peter more sympathetic and less asocial whilst still being an outsider. Essentially it was Lee and Ditko balancing things out rather than Wein/Wolfman’s take wherein Peter was just naturally a loner. Even if Spidey in costume should lean towards being a solo act, Peter as a person is not asocial.

Finally lets talk about Robbie’s little speech. Robbie tries to counter argue Jameson, when the latter explains his dislike for Spidey. JJJ’s argument is that the glorification Spider-Man gets comes at the expense of everyday heroes, normal people. Robbie’s counter is that a normal person is who is under Spider-man’s mask, and he could claim fame and glory by revealing himself if he wanted. He elaborates that the reason Spidey doesn’t is because so long as he wears the mask Spider-man can be anybody, a symbol of any man who hates injustice and who fights for the good can become.

This speech is another example where Wein and Wolfman’s sentiments have grains of truth in them but do not come together.

An important part of the whole point of Spider-Man IS that he is (relatively) ordinary. And on a meta level his costume totally covering his body does indeed allow the audience member a certain amount of wish fulfillment.

But there are several problems with this passage.

To begin with Jonah’s objections contradict the novel because Spider-man is a public pariah, not a glorified hero. In fact a great bit of the novel is where Spider-Man encounters a group of secrtaries who’re initially frightened of him due to his reputation, only to be taken aback when they realize he’s a lot younger and gentler than they believed.

Secondly, it’s very clear that the novel isn’t trying to zero in on a particular aspect of Spider-Man and talk about it metatextually. It’s obviously tyring to deliver some grand summation of Spider-Man’s character as a whole and what his appeal is. And the fact that he is a symbol or has a full body outfit has nothing to do with that. Spider-Man’s appeal lies primarily outside of his costume and his specific and particular life struggles. He really isn’t a symbol. BATMAN is a symbol. Superman is a symbol. Wonder Woman is a symbol. Peter Parker is a man.

Finally, the speech is just not great in the context of the novel. The dialogue is clunky and because Robbie hasn’t been shown to know Spider-Man (or Peter) all that well and has even been stated to be actively indifferent to him, it just comes off as disingenuous. Robbie isn’t Wein/Wolfman’s in-story mouthpiece, he is randomly possessed by their spirits and forced to speak their words.

It’s a nice to see Robbie doing Spidey a solid, but the sentiments are problematic.

And problematic just about sums up Peter’s handling in this whole novel.

Hell the novel resolves Spider-Man’s retirement angst practically off page and well before the climax of the story. Even by the standards of the time, that’s just incompetent.

Audio Adventure

Finally we come to how this audiobook adaption holds up.

It is…serviceable.

The narrator, Tristan Wright, is at his best with Doc Ock but his voice doesn’t suit the old fashioned dialogue. It comes off as an impersonation of how people talked in old timey movies as opposed to genuine. Jameson is the worst offender, although the dialogue would make anyone struggle.

His female and black voices are….eh….I don’t like them.

And as for his Spider-Man. Well, he skates the line between falling flat and just about getting the job done. But it’s never good. I know this is weird to say, but given how dated the novel is Wright just sounds too modern. They should’ve gotten someone who either sounds more old fashioned or was just an older person. Dan Gilvezan, voice of the 1980s Spidey cartoons, might’ve been a good choice.

Beyond that there is just nothing to really write home about this audiobook. It doesn’t have multiple actors or a soundscape, the only music involved is for the title sequence.

It gets the job done but does little else.

Conclusion

Over all, I must confess to being rather disappointed in this novel and even would kind of prefer it to be non-canonical given the continuity errors it creates.

It’s more valuable as a historical curiosity than an actual story and has perhaps lowered my (already not great) opinion of Wein and Wolfman as Spider-Scribes.

I’d advise checking it out if you want to be a completist or if you want to appreciate how the standards for Spidey novels have improved.

*Hot take: Aside from Conway’s work, 1970s Spider-Man was in general not as good as 1960s Spidey stories, let alone those from the 1980s.

**See why Stan was the GOAT?

#Spider-Man #Marv Wolfman #Len Wein #Peter Parker #doc ock #doctor octopus #otto octavius #J. Jonah Jameson #Joe Robertson #Joe Robbie Robertson #mjwatsonedit #Mary Jane Watson #Mary Jane Watson Parker #MJ Watson #Aunt May #May Parker

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