#both before you prep yourself to commit another act

[imcreatingchaos]

Obsessed with this image of Light from the first ED. It’s such a good example of perspective fuckery where, as long as your shoulder is sufficiently behind your neck, you seem to be in an assertive posture with your shoulders back and chest out— even though you are, in reality, drawing your shoulders IN and hunching your back (which is more weary looking and makes you seem small). It’s a cool detail because what does that mean?? The real Light Yagami is purely borne from perspective? That Light only sees himself as who he WANTS to be?

Another thing I love is the colour contrast, where Light in the mirror is given “real” saturated colours while the real Light is desaturated, maybe to represent how dissociated he actually is from the whole Kira thing. Or maybe it is to show how Light’s persona is the only thing he sees as valuable and “bright” in his life— his mirror self, which is not as pathetic as who he really is. Ie; who is NOT a bored, powerless schoolboy.

It’s also got a very claustrophobic feel. Academic, with books lining his shelves (hell, he’s wearing his school uniform) and there’s nothing which shows personality. The balcony’s parapet seals his view of anything other than the clear blue sky.

I love Light sm.

[awkward-tension-art]

Order 66 (tbb x Jedi!reader)

Ok, so i’ve had this idea in my head of the clones with a Jedi S/O during Order 66. I don’t mean they act on Order 66, I mean if everything sorta played out similar in canon (Chip doesn’t work)

Idk, I like me some protective boys.

CW: minimally proofread, jedi!S/O, Reader, Gender neutral pronouns, Order 66, violence, death, swearing, Hunter trying his best, Wrecker being a sweetie, Echo is ready to fight, Tech is the only one who is level headed, and Crosshair being somewhat emotional

You were following Caleb when the order came through. Your steps stumbled and your knees hit the cold ground. All around you, the Force was being ripped apart. Hands were on your shoulders. 

your lover. You barely realized through the haze.

With absolute horror, you watched helplessly as clones gunned down Depa Billaba. “Run Caleb!” You heard her scream through the overwhelming grief and death you felt. The padawan turned, lightsaber ready. 

“Get away from us!” he barked, calling your name, “Get up! Please!”

He was panicked, confused. So were you. 

You managed to look up, seeing the clone troopers across the field standing over Master Billaba’s smoking corpse. They were prepping to kill you and the padawan next.

Without another word you bolted, grabbing Caleb’s hand and sprinting to the trees. You didn’t look back. You had to make sure the kid was safe.

Hunter

“Wait!” He’ll give chase before stopping at the tree line. He had never seen you look so devastated and afraid. 

He’s going to follow you. Of course he is. He’s just as confused as everyone else. 

Until Tech finally finds out what's going on

“The Jedi have been ordered to be executed.” “Which one?” “All of them.”

“What!? Why!?” Hunter is panicked at this point. The troopers behind him have orders to kill. They won’t show you mercy. 

“Apparently they’ve committed treason.”

By the time he finds you, Caleb had already jumped across the ravine and was waiting for you. You turned, tears in your eyes.

“I can feel it…everyone is being killed.” 

“We’re going to figure this out,” He’s going to try and calm you down, “I promise, we’re going to figure this out.” His arms are around you. 

It wasn’t safe for you. Not anywhere near him and the others. He knows this. You know this. 

The two of you come up with a hurried plan.

“Go to these coordinates. Once we know what's going on, I’ll come find you.” He’ll kiss you passionately, “Get the kid and hide.” 

Hunter won’t go with you. He’s the squad leader. He can’t just go missing. 

Despite the fear that you’ll be found out, he trusts you and your skills to stay alive.

Once you jump across, he’ll watch, make sure no one follows or tries to shoot at you. 

Once he’s questioned on your whereabouts, he’s going to lie, “I managed to stab the kid and shoot the Jedi. both of them fell into the water.”

I will say, his nerves are shot until he gets to you again. 

But in the meanwhile? He’s antsy. Anxious and a tad distracted.

Also a hairs trigger from snapping.

Crosshair badgers him at Kamino and Hunter barely holds back a punch.

Hunter loves you, so damn dearly. And right now he can’t protect you because he needs to figure out what the fuck is going on.

But, after finding the truth and getting Omega, he makes a damn beeline for the coordinates he gave you.

Plus side? Caleb and Omega become friends.

Echo

What the FUCK just happend!?

He sprints into the trees to keep up, ignoring how Hunter is calling his name. 

“Echo, get back here!” 

“No.” He will cut off his comms. 

He’s an ARC trooper, he can track you to a degree. He’s not like Hunter, but he gets to the general area where you are. 

He manages to get to a clearing where you and Caleb are hiding in the trees. 

“Cyare!” Echo is clearly confused, worried and he swears he feels the same amount of death that’s overwhelmed you. 

Once you reveal yourself, his helmet is off and his arms are around you so tightly.

“I don’t know what's going on, but I’ll keep you and Commander Dume safe.”

Hunter and Crosshair catch up to you, and once Crosshair aims his blaster at you and Caleb, Echo is ready to brawl. 

He stands protectively in front of you, gun aimed at the sniper, “If your skinny ass doesn’t put the fucking gun away I swear to-!”

“Both of you stand down!” Hunter will have to get between them, because Echo is 100% willing to shoot Crosshair if it means you stay safe. 

He’s not aware Crosshair doesn't exactly have a choice at the moment.

Really no one is aware.

But he’s lost domino squad, he’s lost Fives, he's lost legion, right now his former general is probably being killed…He’s lost so much already.

He refuses to lose you too.

So Echo pulls the trigger first, settling on stunning him and making a dash towards the ravine. Hunter has to keep up.

Once Caleb is across, he’ll get meetup coordinates from Hunter.

Echo goes with you. He doesn’t return to Kamino. The moment he's across the ravine with you and Caleb he’s a deserter. 

He doesn’t care. He just doesn’t want to lose you.

He’s a strong, determined guard, and one who didn’t let you or Caleb get hurt.

Wrecker

He casts a glance at Hunter before running off after you. 

He has no idea what Order 66 is. Nor does he care.

The guy saw you so…out of it. So scared and confused.

His protective instincts have geared up to 11. 

Hunter goes with him, while Crosshair is the one who remains behind to stall.

Once Tech informs everyone that the Jedi have been named traitors and should be executed on sight, Wrecker gets serious. Very serious. 

He becomes so unlike himself, even Crosshair is surprised.

Honestly? I see Wrecker as someone willing to gun down any ‘reg’ if they’re threatening his squad or s/o. 

Even this early into the Empire.

When he sees you, he’s immediately grabbing you into his arms which causes Caleb to attack.

Admittedly he’s gonna tackle Caleb, only adding to the poor kids terror. 

“Wrecker, you're scaring him!” 

But after a strong bear hug and an “Easy kid! I’m tryna help you!” The padawan calms down enough to listen. 

He puts Caleb down, rips off his helmet and gives you one hell of a kiss. 

He’s worried. He’s scared. And he wants to protect you. 

Hunter will have to talk him down from running off with you.

The sergeant has to keep his squad together. It sucks but they need to figure out what the heck is happening at the moment.

Wrecker desperately wants to go with you but he can’t abandon his squad.

However, he feels much better once Hunter gives some safe coordinates to lay low and hide.

He’ll get you to the ravine and stand guard until you and Caleb are across and out of sight.

You bet your ass when he meets up with you again he’s not letting you go. 

Tech

He isn’t as emotional as the others at the moment. He’s actually focused on gathering as much information in the least amount of time.

He waits, listening to the comm chatter. What is going on? why?

“Execute Order 66.”

After a second, he shares a look with Hunter.

“Tech, go after-”

No more words need to be said. Tech is gone and going after you.

He’s smart. He knows your patterns. He knows where you’d most likely hide. So he focuses on that.

Once he’s confident he’s in a broad area where you and Caleb are, he’s going to call out to you, “Cyare? There’s something called Order 66 on the comms.” 

Tech gives you information first. He won’t make you reveal yourself if you don’t feel safe enough. 

When Echo announces that the Jedi have been charged with treason, he’ll relay that to you. 

“The comms say the Jedi committed treason against the Republic,” He’s going to keep looking around for you, “I know you. You’d never do such a thing. I’m here, Cyare. I can help you.”

Once you reveal yourself, Caleb behind you, he feels the biggest amount of relief. 

He pulls off his helmet, giving you a small smile.

“Tech…The Jedi…” your voice cracks, “They’re being killed…I can feel it.” 

“I know, Cyare…I’m sorry.” He tries his best to comfort you, but he knows he can never understand. 

The amount of Jedi he’s worked with can be counted on one hand. 

But he knows this is your family. Your friends. Your very life.

Once Hunter meets up with you guys, a plan can be put in place. 

He gives you coordinates for a location to meet-up and hide. You’ll lay low with Caleb.

In the meantime, Tech will return to Kamino, figure out what's happening, and from there a better, more long term plan can be made.

Before you leave though, he’s going to give you the longest, most passionate kiss he's ever given you.

He’s well aware that there's a chance you can be found and killed. 

Tech is the only one who has accepted that you may not make it out of this.

But he’s going to keep his mind occupied, distract himself until he’s by your side again. 

Crosshair

As soon as the order goes out, Crosshair is under the influence of the inhibitor chip.

He just doesn’t know. No one does at this point.

He watches you run away with Caleb and the drive to hunt you down is hard to ignore.

He needs to find you to kill you, to protect you.

But, the sudden headache he has is damn near blinding.

Crosshair follows Hunter, keeping his comms on.

He freezes when Tech finds out the Jedi have been marked for execution.

The Inhibitor Chip in his skull is contending with his feelings for you.

He needs to execute save you.

When he spots you he pulls his rifle and aims but barely manages to stop himself.

He can’t hurt you. He needs to kill loves you.

Crosshair draws some sort of conclusion that Kaminoans had conditioned all clones to follow specific orders.

He doesn’t know of the chip. He just assumes it comes from the troopers' conditioning.

When his arms are around your body, for a brief moment he thinks of snapping your neck.

Good soldiers follow orders.

He hates orders.

This is the point where Crosshair knows something is seriously wrong with him.

But he’s not going to say anything yet. He can still fight if need be.

“You need to run…hide…get away from here.” it's a rare moment that he’s scared.

The sniper is desperate to shoot protect you.

The headache is persistent, and it’s somewhat distracting.

But he’ll power through.

Crosshair will wait for Hunter to come up with…something. 

His eyes are on the area around you, gun set to kill in case any reg tries anything.

The plan? Clone Force 99 returns to Kamino while you and Caleb go into hiding. 

You have coordinates. He can find you later. 

But…well Crosshair doesn’t like that. At all.

Hear me out. Like Echo, Crosshair goes with you. He knows somethings up with him, but he trusts himself more than he trusts anyone else.

“Tell Kamino they killed me.” He instructs Hunter, “That I died trying to stop the Jedi and you managed to get justice.”

He crosses the ravine with you, only looking back to nod back to Hunter. 

By the time Crosshair, you and Caleb safely get off the planet, his headache is a small annoyance that goes away with time.

Crosshair sticks with you until he reunites with his squad and notices Omega

Welp, you got Caleb, what's one more kid?

[gym-advise]

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Sneak in activity wherever you can. Take the stairs instead of the elevator, do stretches during conference calls, or try a quick 10-minute workout before bed. These small pockets of activity may not feel like much, but they add up over time.

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Use apps, journals, or even photos to measure your progress. Seeing improvements, no matter how small, can be incredibly motivating.

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Fitness doesn’t have to be a solo journey. Involve your family, find a workout buddy, or join a community that keeps you accountable. You could even inspire others to start their journey!

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Celebrate milestones, whether it’s hitting a new personal best or sticking to your routine for a month. Treat yourself to something non-food-related, like new workout gear or a relaxing spa day.

Final Thoughts: Small Changes, Big Results

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Take the first step toward a fitter, healthier you. You've got this!

[jesschastcin]

𝔹𝕚𝕠𝕡𝕚𝕔 ℙ𝕒𝕟𝕖𝕝 | 𝕁𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕚𝕔𝕒 ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕚𝕟

1.) Who did you play?

I've played three real characters, crazy, I know. I played the most incredible women. Tammy Faye Bakker in The Eyes of Tammy Faye, Tammy Wynette in George & Tammy and Amy Loughren in The Good Nurse.

2.) What gravitated you to that role?

It's a very long story, but when I was doing press for Zero Dark Thirty, I was in a hotel room and came upon a documentary called The Eyes of Tammy Faye. I felt an instant connection with Tammy, there was so much nuance, and she was so much more than the press had made her out to be. With Tammy Wynette, I've been a country fan basically since I was born, and I wanted her story to be out there. Same with Amy, she's an incredible woman who discovered the horrible crimes that Charles Cullen had committed, and she helped the police catch him. I felt like we needed more stories about how incredible women are, and I was fortunate enough to produce all three projects.

3.) What was prep like for your role?

I actually studied Tammy Faye for 12 years before playing her. In 2010 I bought the rights of her story and documentary, and I had hundreds of hours of unseen footage. I was so invested in doing her justice. For both Tammys, I had vocal and singing coaches. Their accents were so different and I had to sing in both projects. Singing is by far the most nerve-wracking thing I've ever done. I cannot begin to tell you how nervous and anxious I was about the singing parts. And with Amy, I went to nursing boot camp, an inside joke that we had. For five months, I shadowed several nurses, learned to do sutures, change IVs, and many more things. I wanted the performance to be as real as possible.

4.) Was there anything about the role that didn’t resonate with you?

Not at all. They are incredible women, and I know I've been saying this a lot but it's the truth. They weren't perfect because who is, right? Since I produced all three projects, I had a lot of creative control. I wanted to bring these stories to life in a way that people would be able to connect with them.

5.) Would you play this person again?

I think we gave a proper ending to all three projects, so I don't think there would be room for sequels. I love them, I loved playing them but I think those chapters are now closed.

6.) Did you find out anything about yourself while playing another person?

With Tammy Faye I learned a lot about empathy. I’m inspired by her radical acts of love. I’m inspired by her compassion. I see it as a guiding principle that leads us forward. It connects us all and the desire that we want to be accepted for who we are, accepted for who we love, and to live a life without the fear of violence or terror. She had this saying, you are unconditionally loved for the uniqueness that is you, and that's something I'll never forget. And with Tammy Wynette and Amy, I learned about resilience. About fighting for the people you love and that's also something I'll never forget.

7.) What was the most challenging thing about being in a biopic?

There are many challenges in portraying real people. You often worry about being able to do them justice not just for the audience but also for their family. You want to do your best and not let anyone down. That was my main concern. Which is why it took me so long to bring all three projects to life.

8.) Have you met the person you played?

Both Tammy's passed away and I didn't have the honor of meeting them but I did meet Amy. I was so lucky to have her as a consultant on The Good Nurse. She was incredibly kind, always answering any questions I had.

[sinfulcries]

hi sir! i really enjoy your works so could i request atsumu's senpai catching him jacking off while moaning reader's name in the locker room and reader takes his virginity on the spot?

maneater — atsumu x male reader

author's notes. UHM I AM SO SORRY THIS IS REALLY LONG I GOT REALLY INTO IT HAHAHA. this was also beta read by my lodicakes @bunbyy <3 thank you so much NJKNDKJA

tw. senpai kink, public sex, exhibitionism, mating press, caught masturbation, university au, virginity loss, peer pressure, belly bulge, size difference, unprotected sex, barebacking, facefucking, facial, sleazy senpai reader

Miya Atsumu, by all means, was never interested in dating or the concept of love and crushes and infatuation. All of those seemed vaguely unfamiliar to the boy who only had volleyball on his victory-hungry mind. When it came to a certain male on his team however, he would instantly lose his composure. His knees would feel like jelly whenever their fingers would brush against each others accidentally and his face would heat up like wildfire when the flirty, tall senior would attempt to flirt with him.

A crush, Miya supposed. These feelings would go away sooner or later but Osamu and his teammates who clearly caught onto Atsumu’s strange behavior, begged to differ.

More often than intended, you two would have the thickest and most uncomfortable sexual tension. And one of those instances was right now.

After one of your practice matches, you had peeled your shirt off to reveal your seemingly perfect body. Atsumu revelled in the way your skin glistened under the sheer layer of sweat coating your big arms and your toned abdomen, or the way the fabric of your shorts hung low and exposed more than what meets the eye, leaving Atsumu to imagine the rest of what laid beneath. The blonde made sure to take his sweet time memorizing every crevice of your toned stomach, failing to notice the teasing smirk plastered on your face.

Interrupting the male’s not so discreet sightseeing, you chuckled. “Enjoying the view, Tsumu?” You teased, making the said male blush embarrassedly. “N-No! Shut yer trap, Senpai!” He sneered only to receive a grin from you in reply. “You know, You’re really cute when you’re flustered, dollface.”

God, the things you did to him were dangerous and the cute pet name went straight to his cock, making it noticeably twitch against his thigh. The shorter man merely ignored your statement with a blush on his face, giving you an embarrassed wave before walking towards the locker room, “I'm gonna take a shower.”

By showering, Atsumu meant releasing his sexual frustration by jacking off to the thought of you fucking him. The wing spiker shut his eyes in pleasure as he flicked his wrist around his length shamelessly, lips parted ever so slightly as he moaned your name.

The thought of you manhandling him, having him pressed up against your chest as you fucked him raw made Atsumu shut his eyes tightly. His pace only increased as he fisted his cock much faster, imagining that it was your bigger hand instead. This was definitely more than a crush-- Miya just came to the thought of his teammate for fuck’s sake! Thank God you weren’t there to witness the sinful and humiliating act that he had just committed.

By the time he came, shooting thick ribbons of white cum onto the tile walls, he rinsed the rest of his body clean before reaching out of the stall to grab his towel. Before he could even grasp the cloth, another person snatched it before he could, making him groan frustratedly.

“‘Samu, I swear if this is you, I’ll cut yer ba—”

When Atsumu opened the shower curtain however, the culprit was not his twin brother but instead, you stood in front of him with an amused look on your face. Your teasing expression only making the shorter man gulp nervously.

Avoiding your coy gaze, you taunted, “You’re a bad boy, Atsumu.” while moving to pin the blonde against the tile walls. Atsumu let out a soft squeak, feeling your calloused fingertips rubbing teasingly against the rim of his ass.

“Touching yourself to the thought of me.” You growled, leaning in to lap at the expanse of his neck, your teeth slowly dragging against his skin leaving bite marks on the clean flesh.

The blonde let out a breathy moan, as he tried to explain himself, however his mind was clouded with nothing but lust and disbelief. “I’ll give you the real thing instead. How does that sound?” You whispered, making the blonde shake his head. “I-I don’t want to..”

As much as he desperately wanted to feel your cock messing up his insides, he was embarrassingly enough, a virgin. And to have his virginity taken in some dirty locker room had him thinking more rationally, holding himself back from succumbing into his desires.

“Why not? Are you a virgin?” You teased, making Atsumu pipe up with humiliation. “Am not!” He protested.

Not believing the blonde, your hand inched towards his ass, prodding at his entrance with one finger. The male immediately jolted forward into your chest, squeaking as you pushed the digit in. “F-feels weird…” Atsumu murmured.

Ah, a virgin. How adorable.

The best people to fuck, in your not so humble opinion, were virgins. They were quite similar to new toys— they’d have your cock inside of their cunts, getting a good feel of how big you are before they’re reduced to a sobbing mess, feeling your cock molding them into your shape.

“C’mon now, ‘Tsumu, don’t be such a buzzkill for yer senpai.” You mused, giving his ass a harsh slap. “I’ll take good care of you. I’ll be gentle.” Your words weren’t the most convincing especially paired with the predatory gaze in your eyes. Nonetheless, Atsumu complied hesitantly, deciding to trust you instead, “Ugh fine. Ya better be gentle or I’m backing out.”

‘You’d be too addicted to even think about backing out’ You thought to yourself, grinning as you pulled the blonde out of the shower, urging him to lay down on one of the benches before pulling your shorts off along with your boxers.

By no means were you remotely close to small. Atsumu shamelessly drooling at the sight of your thick cock leaking beads of precum in your hand. Miya could only gulp as you pressed the smooth head of your cock against his bottom lip, letting the fat head part his lips open. “W-Wait you won’t go too deep right?” Atsumu mumbled worriedly.

“Just trust me.” You responded, guiding the rest of your cock inside of his mouth slowly. And without a single warning, you grabbed the boy by the back of his head, pulling him in closer as he choked helplessly on your cock. “You can take it right Tsum? Senpai knows you can.” The condescending grin that wormed its way onto your lips made Atsumu moan against your cock, your hips now moving to fuck the wing spiker’s warm throat.

You could vaguely hear the sound of him choking and gurgling around your thick length, the younger man’s jaw now going slack with how long you’ve been mercilessly thrusting into his mouth. “Shh, Samu might walk in at any minute. How would he react to seeing his cute lil twin getting facefucked by his sleazy senior?” You whispered tauntingly, Miya only “mmf!”-ing in reply.

With your thrusts slowly becoming sloppy as you felt your high approaching, you took your cock of the blonde’s mouth before spilling your load on his pretty face, relishing in the way your cum dripped over the boy’s cute features. “S-Senpai…” The boy panted, shakily taking your cock in his small hand “Want more…”

Your prediction was proven to be correct. Miya Atsumu was already addicted to your cock and you haven’t even taken his virginity yet! What a charming lil whore, so easy for you to break and corrupt!

Smiling at the blonde, your fingers were now pushed against the puffy rim of his ass, the dampness from his recent shower making it much easier to prep his hole for your cock. Atsumu let out a soft gasp as you started to curl and twist your fingers inside of him, his body writhing cutely against the bench he was laying on. “Mm so tight, I can’t wait to fill this cute cunt up.”

Miya blushed at your words, the venom in your voice making him flush red with how needy he was for you. Jolting upwards, he could feel your fingers brushing against his prostate, a flurry of high pitched moans ripping past his throat as you continued to fingerfuck the poor boy. “Ssssso good~!” Squealing girlishly, Atsumu’s cock trembled before he came on his stomach.

“Fuck, you look so hot” You rasped out, admiring the way his chest heaved up and down, his oversensitive cock now twitching against his stomach. As much as you wanted to spend your time admiring the view, your patience was wearing thin, and you could barely keep yourself from climbing on top of his quivering figure, aligning the head of your cock against his puckered rim before pushing every inch inside of him. The pain was absolutely unbearable-- the thought of pushing you off of him was the only thing occupying his mind as he blinked back the fat tears forming in his eyes.

As expected, his ass felt so good wrapped around your cock. Nothing beats the feel of a freshly entered, young virgin, especially since he looked so pretty folded down on the bench with your cock filling his ass.

“It hurts! Too big--!” Atsumu whimpered, finally letting the tears he had been holding back stream down his pretty little face. You only grasped both of his legs in response, folding him with ease so that his ass was raised to take in more of your cock. With you, balls deep inside of him-- It was safe to say that Atsumu was slowly breaking. It was obvious with how his tongue was stuck out, eyes crossed lewdly as the tears, cum and drool on his face mixed messily together. The satisfaction of burying every inch of your cock inside of his ass only brought a wicked smile on to your face and it didn’t take long for you to start fucking him and breeding him against the dirty bench, each euphoric thrust sending atsumu overdrive as he breathlessly panted for more. His whimpers sent you into a frenzy, your hips pistolling deeper to abuse his prostate-- and the blonde could only scream for dear life as you pounded into his guts mercilessly.

Rich, deep moans spilled from your lips only aiding Atsumu into orgasming much faster. And Your brash, rapid thrusts made ‘Tsumu moan out in pure bliss, keeping himself balanced as he held onto your sturdy arms. “Such a fucking cockslut for a virgin.” You groaned, Driving your cock deeper inside of him so that you could marvel at the little bump bulging out of his toned stomach.

“Look at that, you can even see my cock in yer little tummy.” Teasing him never got old, especially with the cute whine that came out of his mouth. “If only the team was able to see just how much of a virgin whore you really are.”

That alone was enough to make Atsumu cum once more, and with one more drive of your hips against his colon, you watched as his body spasmed against your cock, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as he cried out your name.

Although you did have a bad habit of tossing virgins away once you were done using them up, you were certain that you’d keep Miya Atsumu for a while. After all, he was quite fun to play with.

[babytaes]

†hê Ðêmðñ (the beauty of sin)

𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞: You're a guardian angel who's never been tasked with protecting anyone. Since you've been here since Creation, sitting around in heaven hasn't brought you any rewards. You were looking forward to the day when you'd be assigned a human to look after. When that day finally arrives, things take an unexpected turn when you are assigned to Heeseung, a demon from the underworld.

𝖕𝖆𝖎𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖌: heeseung x female reader

𝖌𝖊𝖓𝖗𝖊: angst, suggestive/smut

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙: 4k

𝖜𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘: profanity, smut scenes, bad boy heeseung (lol), 

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖗𝖆𝖎𝖙𝖘: click me before reading!

➳ part of the drunk & dazed series

☆ ҉ ◢▅◣

Sin is a spiritual virus that invades the whole being. It makes you morally and spiritually weak. It’s a deadly disease that infects every part of you: your body, your mind, your emotions, and your motives—absolutely everything. Nobody has the strength on their own to overcome its power.

Nobody should ever commit sin, never giving in to their worldly and sinful impulses. It's unjust and wrong. However, what is it about sin that makes it so fascinating and enjoyable?

It gave you joy to see it in his smile or the way his hands caressed your body. What a lovely thing sin is!

Even though some sins are innocent and enjoyable, sometimes regulations are supposed to be broken. Everyone, after all, is a sinner.

“WHAT!?,?” You began to sweat as you worriedly communicated your concerns to your overseer, “You must be mistaken, High Lord.”

“I understand the protocol; angels are supposed to serve as "guardian angels" to beautiful or broken souls on Earth. You know we're expected to look after them and keep an eye on them to make sure they stay on track. With all due respect, ma'am, I don't believe I'm qualified for this position; at the very least, someone of level 10 would be ideal.”

Her cream-colored wings swept her off her feet as she chuckled and waved for you to follow her. You sighed as you flutter up and away with her, trailing behind her, feeling a twitch in yours.

As you eventually caught up to her, dodging angels left and right, you apologized to random angels in your path, uncomfortably smiled at the people you bumped into with your wings.

You retracted your wings closer to you and walked uneasily beside your overseer as you carefully stepped down on the golden road.

Before you could say anything, she quietly took your hand in hers and gently kissed it, assuring you that everything would be alright. As you approached the center of the commotion, you bit your lower lip and remained silent.

Looking around at the community, it warmed your heart to see so many people, young and old, out here. Some you've known since the beginning of time, while others were born only last week. Everyone had gathered to witness the masterpiece that would emerge in an instant.

“You know Y/N I have complete faith in you that this first expedition will be a breeze,” you smiled, looking up at her with excitement and a tinge of fear in your eyes. “We wouldn't have suggested you for the job unless we knew who you really are, and you've earned it.” Don't worry, you were expecting this; now have a look.”

With her finger pointing to the stage forward, you were treated to yet another spectacular show. They're known as the "Grand Turning" in Heaven. This is where a new or seasoned angel has completed his or her training with a human or demon and earned their proper place in the community.

It could be a badge, a ribbon, or something more unique, such as the opportunity to talk with the all-powerful, our God.

Despite the fact that you were assigned to him, you were determined to get those jobs because they were the only way for you to ever get that honor. You weren't going to allow Mr. Unperfect take away that once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

Nobody could and will ever be able to make you fail this assignment; you were meticulously prepped. You were taught the correct and only way to do things, and now was your opportunity to shine. You were not going to be a Lucifer, cast from Heaven

“I'll do it,” you said to your supervisor, a smile on your face and confidence in your eyes. She turned to face you and hugged you passionately, rubbing your wings with a motherly devotion.

“I knew you could do it; now it's time to get you ready.”

---

When people have a near-death experience, they always remark that life flashes before their eyes. Unfortunately for angels, it's the contrary; when we're approached with a high-alert danger or warning, it's more of a gentle whisper in our ears. Normally more attentive while traveling to Earth.

The best place to be humans say.. What is with these fickle minded words?

You take a deep breath and turn to face your overseer, who is polishing her wings to ensure that they are kept in order. When having wings, a routine is taught from the beginning to keep them in a good up do. Nobody wants to look simple when you can look stunning.

She took your hand in hers and walked toward the end of the route, issuing some documents to the Pearl City Gate guards. You noticed the circular orb while glancing around.

"How can some humans believe in the world being flat, we literally have an air-like view. To me, it's definitely round.” She chuckled as she pinched your cheeks and turned your puzzled face to her.

“When you get down to earth, you'll see a lot of that, people with a lot of opinions. But what did you learn in your training?”

Standing up and smoothing your wings, you calmly shouted out the words as if they were written on the back of your palm.

“Although humans are the destroyers of their own precious planet, everyone's opinion matters, regardless of race, gender, or identity.”

“Well, not all,” you began scratching your head, “I've seen some harsh individuals in our study books, God should strike them down-“

“Um no ma'am, let us put it aside for the time being and focus on what needs to be done.” She started going over a list of laws and regulations for your descent to Earth. As you gave her a thumbs up, you were attentively listening and mentally bookmarking everything in their designated area.

I believe I have a good understanding of everything, and I think I am prepared.” She offered you a short hug before letting you go, showing her affection for you. You were going to miss her, despite the fact that it was a mutually-surface relationship.

“Last but not least, this ordeal will be different in that people will be able to see you. But if you have to use your wings, the lad is the only one who can see you. When you arrive, he will be waiting for you. My child, best of luck and may God bless you.”

You let go of her and moved toward the road's edge, gripping your bag as you turned to face her and waved farewell as you stepped over the brink.

“Wait a minute, what if-“

When you felt a push from behind, you tumbled off the ledge and spun around in the sky, where you saw a smiling face as you glanced up. They didn't tell you that you'd have to be pushed. As you plunged to Earth, you closed your eyes, terrified. Oh, how nice.

Screaming, you descended into the atmosphere, your narrowed eyes seeing glimpses of land here and there. Not letting up you let your wings cover your whole body as you plopped down onto soft green grass.

You peered out from your wings, gasping for air, and glanced up.

“Oh, Heavens”

His physique was slender, active, and well-groomed, with a trace of bad boy behavior in his scent. The first thing that struck your eye were the rips in his jeans. How could a man-made mistake seem to be so appealing? As you raised your eyes, you noticed tattoos splattered across his arms and up to his neck. His black velvet-like wings fluttering in the breeze, he raised his palm to his hair and stroked through the old curls, deconstructing the pattern they had once formed.

“Did you just pull a Lucifer or was this all planned?” he coughed as he put out his hand to you, taking a good look at you.

Stuttering in your words you quickly got up and patted yourself off and finally looked him in the eyes, noticing his dark eyes.

“Well, that wasn't supposed to happen, I hoped to fly down here and appear more Angel-like, but I think my overseer had other ideas.”

He said, "Ah," with a bored expression on his face.

“My name is Heeseung, and if you don't mind, I assume you don't.” I guess my name is well-known in Heaven. You're probably the fifth Angel who has appeared in the last year to “assist me.” What a load of bullshit; you can't hide what's already there, you know.”

He made a pouty look as he smirked closer to you before covering his hand with his mouth and saying, “oh forgive me, I suppose I have a potty mouth.”

Panicking at this new light, you smiled and coughed loudly and suddenly, “Before you say anything else, I'd want to inform you that I'm not like those angels we don't talk about. I have a holy standard that I adhere to.

He rushed to your face, rolling his eyes at your innocence, and murmured to you, "well see about that little Ms. Purity."

As you moved back and shook your head, spurring out prayers, you tugged the strings of your bag close to you, seeming irritated. Looking up, you noticed him hovering in mid-air with his arms crossed, waiting for you.

“Whether you're coming or not, I'm in the mood for a cup of coffee. Allow me to go fetch you one so that this whole ordeal between us may be over soon and we can both return to our respective worlds.”

You instantly snap open your wings and shot up into the sky, scoffing at his rudeness, and dash by him, racing to the left.

“It's this way, dummy,” he cackled as he immediately shot out. Embarrassed and annoyed, you flipped over to his side and flew alongside him, praying to the Lord for peace as your rage subsided.

“Lord, so help me”

---

 “So, what's on the agenda, Ms. Purity? There are a lot of things I'd want to do with you. You know, if you just ditch this whole act, we might be able to have some fun. He winked at you as he sipped his drink while peering across the table.

You shook your head and chuckled, gagging at his remark, "You must get all the girls, you appear really, what's the word, competent" I'm astonished since I assumed everyone down under was inept.”

He smirked and crossed his legs as he lay startled in his chair, cocking his head to the side. It's not that you were trying to be mean; it's just what you were taught. There are no hard feelings.

“Well, as much as I'd like to keep this delightful little date going, I have a commitment to fulfill. You know, duty calls.” You quickly got up and hurried after him, confused as to where he was going, as he shot up in the air and chuckled, waving farewell to you.

“Wait, Heeseung, you can't just go away like that. We need to figure out how I'm going to find you. You're being impolite by getting up and leaving.” You made yourself look insane since you didn't realize no one could see him. You wouldn't want to be labeled as one of these Earthlings.

You beckoned him down, mentally terrified, “Please can you just come down for a damn second.” Your jaw dropped as you hurriedly covered your mouth. Heeseung's jaw dropped when he appeared in front of you, stunned.

“Gasp, I'm hearing a term I'm sure they don't say in Heaven. Hmm, I suppose the Earth changes people.” He went closer to your ear, his warm arm bouncing on your skin as he giggled, his lips inches away from yours.

“I've already entered my phone number into your phone; you do understand what a phone is, right?” Doesn't matter,  I have to get somewhere, and you can locate me later. Okay, I'll see you later.” He swept up in the air and rushed over to the bridge as he vanished into the horizon, rushing out in a haste once more.

You sat back in the coffee chair, wiped your brow, and focused mentally and spiritually, pleading with the Lord for help and forgiveness. You had a feeling this mission was going to be a disaster.

Whining, you threw your hands in the air and sat face down on the table, groaning as you realized this trek. It's no surprise that these honors are well-deserved; it takes a lot of effort.

You cautiously lifted your head and faced the barista after hearing a soft tap on your table. She smiled at you as she set down a piece of paper. You scowled as you inspected the weird set of paper.

“What a jerk, he didn't just leave me to pay for both drinks.” With a shake of your head, you reached inside your bag and drew out a wallet. Your overseer informed you that many people like flaunting and spending their money, so she provided some for you just in case.

As you cleaned up, you began to mentally map out your route through town, mentally picturing the locations and navigating your way home. As you walked over to the cashier, you handed her some money and thanked her before heading out the door.

At the very least, you landed in a fantastic location. It was in the heart of South Korea, and the city was called Seoul, a wonderful metropolis to be sure. You were taught to master specific languages for specific tasks, so communicating wasn't a problem. Despite the fact that you were new in a strange place, you were determined to make the most of it. The first step was to return home and examine the situation.

How to manage Lee Heeseung. 

Arriving at your small abode was an adventure in itself; it didn't take long for you to connect your GPS and get going. It was actually fairly pleasant and provided a change of scenery to enjoy. It's not quite Heaven, but it's still lovely. When you finally arrive at your destination, you look up to see a little, charming apartment in front of you.

They really went all out for you, and it's very much in your style. You'd felt right at home as soon as you stepped inside, as it was more modern and sophisticated.

To be honest, you had no idea what you were doing, but it felt good to have your own little place to do anything you wanted. You could get used to this, no wonder why humans never leave their house. Who would want to leave when you have everything here. Food, entertainment, and a BALCONY!!

As you finished exploring the apartment and basked in its magnificence, you laughed to yourself as you made your way to the couch, sinking into its coziness as sleep took over your mind and body.

*Crunch, thud, bang*

As you lurched forward, you flew up your wings in defense mode, trying to understand what you'd heard.

“Who's there? I have a weapon, and I'm not afraid to use it.”

When you hear a familiar giggle, you look up and see the attractive intruder. Walking over to you and snatching the pillow from your grasp he took your hand and pulled you over to the island where he had prepared some food.

As you took it all in, you smelt familiar scents and smiled, completely forgetting about it until you were reminded again.

“Wait, what are you doing in my apartment, and how did you get in?”

He began to remove some pots and pans from the stove while he placed some food on a platter, saying, "I have my methods."

“I'm not sure what you eat up there in Heaven, but I'm guessing it's all healthy and nutritious food.” You laughed and shook your hand in disbelief while shaking your head.

“I don’t think out of all places we would be eating so strictly. It's basically whatever you can get your hands on.. It's guaranteed to be better food than what you'll find in Hell.”

Pulling the dish away from him, you began to pick at the fries, popping one into your mouth and savoring the flavor, “not bad.”

He bowed in front of you, wiped the sweets from his brow, and returned to sit next to you, grabbing a dish and feeding himself some. As the night progressed, you told him the rundown for the next three months.

“So, despite the fact that you're definitely one of the worst jerks I've ever encountered. For this to function, we'll need to create certain ground rules.” Aiming a finger between you and him. “I'm not sure whether you've ever had to do anything for anyone else in your life, but it's all about serving people around here, and that's why I accepted this assignment. Even if you don't want to help yourself, I want to help you.”

As Heeseung shuffled around in his chair, avoiding eye contact with you, the atmosphere became tense.

“Harsh, but keep going.”

Smiling you continued as you tried to wrap your head around this complex creature.

“I understand that we are supposed to protect and guide you to do good, but it appears that we have progressed far beyond that, and we need to start at the source of your problem, which is most likely your heart or mind. What's going on in both?

As his words danced across your lips, he smirked and drew you closer to him.

“Now there's a secret.” 

Smirking as your face felt warm, you cocked your head to the side and touched his shoulder before getting up and setting your dish in the sink, cleaning up as piercing eyes stabbed your back.

“I understand what you're thinking, and I've got it all under control.”

He approached you and said, "If you say so," as he put his head against your ear.

2 months later 

Everything was certainly out of hand, and he was to blame. Your strategy not only failed, but it was only a matter of time until your overseer found out. And you didn’t want to end up like the last guy tossed from Heaven.

It wasn't all that bad, but who were you kidding, it was a disaster. It wasn't a major shift; rather, it was a series of modest changes. Things like accidentally cursing or hanging out with him at ungodly hours. You convinced yourself that everything was OK.

He drew you into your room and sat you down while hovering over you, gently caressing your body and kissing you.

You smiled and drew him closer to you, wrapping your legs around his waist and bringing him down on you, closing the distance between you.

Heeseung has been on a mission to damage your "innocent demeanor" for the past two weeks. He intended to show you that it was all a charade and that no one is actually perfect. Despite not knowing what he was going to do, you were up for the challenge. That core part of you didn't take long to succumb to his immoral impulses.

What was the problem as long as you were both happy?

“Heeseung,” you say as he draws you closer to him and unclasps your bra with his free hand. As you slowly rise to assist him, you toss the material to the ground and reach for his sweatpants.

“Someone a little needy, but we are not doing that today. Today is all about pampering my lovely angel. Is it all right?”

Nodding your head, you keep an eye on him as he goes between your legs, halting at the bottom as he eyes your breast and grasps softly as your body adjusts.

“Hurry up,” you grumble as you stare at his sinister grin. As you moan, he places gentle lips along your folds, leaning down to your core. As you twitch under his touch, his finger makes a fast dive between your folds, inciting dampness.

As you whine from the pressure, your eyes flutter shut as he switches his finger out with his tongue, softly licking up your surface.

“mm, close,” you exclaim, your lips wide open as he notices your clit, tongue flicking lustfully against it. As he presses harder on your sensitive region, he laughs as you break apart under his power.

“Oh God, right there.” 

“Please don't involve Him in this.” He hits a place as your high comes crashing down on you, chuckling at your reaction. Heeseung is holding you down and watching you quiver wildly as you release juice, which causes him to swallow it before wiping his mouth. As you fall onto his body, overwhelmed and still sensitive to the sensation, he pulls you up.

He lays your exhausted body next to his and wipes any excess arousal from his mouth before kissing your lips.

You both lay in a comfortable stillness for the remainder of the night, your breathing slowly returning to normal as you sign into his arms.

“Perhaps you're right; we're all just horny, messed-up creatures; I mean, even though what we're doing is completely wrong, it was fun to break the rules. My entire life has been focused on doing the right thing and being this upstanding angel. It's fun to deviate from the norm.” As Heeseung witnessed you erupt in rage, you became agitated.

“You’re cute when you’re mad, also I told you.” You both chuckled as you pushed him to the side before coming to a halt in the middle of your conversation, looking concerned at him.

“However, I leave tomorrow and I don't think I'll be ready to see you off, and this was not in my plan.”

“Shhh, I figured it out; just stick to my plan and we'll both come out on top.”

You sat closer to him, nodding your head and clasping your hand in his as you allowed sleep to take over your body.

As you may know, angels and humans have quite distinct punishments; some humans are never punished for their wrongdoings, whereas angels' actions are usually discovered one way or another.

And you were terrified that they would find out. The person who fell from the edge was not the same person who was returning back and everyone was going to know it. Just not right now, you had to maintain your composure as you approached your overseer.

As you were greeted with the overseer and some guards, you held Heeseung by his chains and whispered something into his ear.

“I see you were having a good time?” You shook your head and looked down, worried. You looked up at her with sad eyes.

“Yes, High Lord, I am aware of my error and what needs to be done in order to be purified once more. I accept complete responsibility for this assignment, but I crack him first, and we have all the secrets we need.”

As he observed you return to the opposite side with the overseer, Heeseung's gaze shifted up in fright. Fearing for his life, he flailed his wings in an attempt to flee.

“What the hell, Y/N, I thought we were on the same team.” How could you betray me in such a way?” You walked over to his trembling body and pushed him down so you were above him, laughing loudly. You patted his shoulder as you cackled.

“And they said angels could be trustworthy. I know what I'm worth, and it has nothing to do with you. Heseeung, please accept my apologies. Get him out of here.” The guards grabbed his chains and dragged him to a chamber across the room from you.

As she began to compliment you on your efforts, the supervisor wrapped her arm around your shoulder.

“I'm proud of you, Y/N, even though you used some terrible techniques. I knew you'd be able to pull it off.”

You grinned joyously and thanked her for her faith in you as you looked up at her face. You cast another peek at Heeseung as she stepped forward, and he winked at you. Smirking before he disappeared into the room you chuckled at his behavior.

Everything was going swimmingly, and no one had a clue. I suppose taking over Heaven would be a simple task; if you can blow up the inside, everything will fall apart on its own.

"How could you hide this from all of us?" "Oh God, you underestimated me."

The Beauty of Sin.

☆ ҉ ◢▅◣

➳ Navigate to the Maze

[watevermelon]

Quiet Sort of Love | Sakusa Kiyoomi x Reader

✧ Summary: Manager to the Fukurōdani volleyball club, there was no doubt that Itachiyama’s Sakusa Kiyoomi was a strong ace. He brought your team to their knees on multiple occasions, but what you were not expecting was getting to know the nationally acclaimed spiker beyond just the titles and labels.

✧ Warnings: Implicating language and slight spoilers toward the end (you will be warned beforehand :)) 

✧ Notes: Buckle up boys cause this is a LONG one LMAO -> lots of fluff, angst, slight BokuAka, character development, mutual pining at one point, and just me being sentimental over one of my favorite teams  -> #SummerWrites for these! I tended to write fluffier stories

✧  Masterlist 

If someone asked you for the full story, there was no way you could explain it. One moment, you were in junior high, relatively enjoying your time on the track team. The next, you were attending Fukurōdani Academy without a clue to which club you wanted to commit to. 

While you could have rejoined the track team, you were not especially good at sprints and had only done so for your friends at the time. Now, there was a much more daunting pressure about what you were going to be committing your time to. Akaashi has suggested you take-up the open managerial role for the volleyball club, since you were unsure you wanted to truly dedicate yourself to any sport. And, somehow within a couple days of that conversation, with the eccentric introductions of second-years Yukie and Kaori, the current managers, you were attending their volleyball practice on a trial session.

Fast-forward a few weeks and it was already the best decision you had made in your first-year of being a Fukurōdani Academy student.

They were dedicated to their sport, their passion easily radiating off of them and to onlookers watching a simple set. It was what entranced you to begin with - their strong zeal that easily drew others into their bubble. Yes, you were a powerhouse school with a long history of being winners. But it was the people that encompassed the team that drew it closer to your heart.

From the confident yet silly second-year Bokuto, to the mother hen Akaashi, you made fast friends with the team and the other managers.

There were times that you had to remind yourself that Bokuto, the same Vice Captain and nationally rising spiker to gain acclaim, was the same Bokuto who had accidentally locked himself out of his dorm room only to find his lanyard in his back pocket.

And, while reminding yourself of Bokuto, you remembered the text you received from the team group-chat early that morning. You had gone home for the weekend to pick-up some stuff from your family home, the place of residence sitting outside Shibuya and a good thirty-minutes by train away from the inner city. 

But, it was a short-lived trip since the next morning you had to return back to the dorms for a practice match set with your school’s supposed long-term rivals: Itachiyama. GC: Hoot Hoot ⊹⋛⋋(◐⊝◑)⋌⋚⊹

6:15 ahKASHi (๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤)         oh no

6:15 Kaori _へ__(‾◡◝ )>         (L/N)-chan pls tell me your awake

6:15 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)         (F/N)-chan you are our only hope

6:20 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)         @Y/N !!!!

6:23 mother-hen^2 (ﾟ⊿ﾟ)         I’m awake!!

6:23 ahKASHi (๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤)         Please tell me you can pick-up some Dorayaki on your way to the school

6:23 mother-hen^2 (ﾟ⊿ﾟ)         ah yes, the patented bokuto revival snacc?

6:24 haaaruki !         thnk u mom

6:24 mother-hen^2 (ﾟ⊿ﾟ)          >.>

6:24 ahKASHi (๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤)         Thank you, (L/N)-san. 💓

And true to your word, or text rather, you stopped for the snack on your way back to the school. However, with the surprisingly crowded trains on this unfortunate weekend, you were near sprinting down the street once you got some open space. You wanted to still be on time, reasoning regardless, and with the pace of the crowd you were going to be way later than you expected. You rushed between trains, hopping onto the right transfer and letting your foot tap away in impatience as the train pushed onward.

Nearing the school, you were in a dead-sprint toward the entrance and only inwardly sighed at seeing the large school bus, from what you assumed was the rival school, covering the main gateway. You approached from the back of the bus, students filing out from the opposite end of where you were running. You did not want to glance down at your watch, afraid of the time you would see, and instead tried to inwardly navigate a way inside and around your obstacles. 

Athletic bags and groups of the students littered the area as they unloaded, forcing you to jump over their stuff if you did not want to break your speed. You were so dead-set in your sprint, you failed to notice the number of eyes on the bus following you in your run.

Just as you turned around the pillar, your speed and momentum came to a stop as you crashed into an unsuspecting student. His hands were in his pockets, a mask covering most of his face, but even you saw the surprised look as his hands shot out to steady the both of you.

Immediately, the dark-haired athlete was chastising you, “Watch where you are going.” The young man immediately pushed you off of him, not in an unkindly way but moreso he wanted his safe distance instantly.

You bowed and muttered out an, “I’m sorry!”

The glare of annoyance was obvious, but it only dropped down when he turned to look at his upturned palms, no longer hidden in his pockets but instead being stared at in a mortified way.

I mean, it’s not like you were dirty? You complained inwardly at his expression, but sucked it up anyway. You were the one who crashed into him and owed the apology anyway and so you could do your duty and then bid the supposed germaphobe goodbye.

Team Mom instincts already kicking in, you reached into your side-bag and took out a small pack of wet-wipes. You opened the container, and not one to incense him further, held it out for him to grab himself.

“An extension of my apology.” You stated at seeing his apprehension, before he took two and wiped his hands clean of your grime. 

It was hard to fight down the inward grimace at seeing this utter stranger be so offended at having even touched and breathed the same air as you.

“Komori, nice to meet you.” Another student came up to the two of you, having emerged from the pack of Itachiyama students. “Sorry for my friend here.”

“It was my mistake.” You stated.

“No worries. Nice to meet you, you on the track team?”

You shook your head before glancing down at your watch, losing more precious minutes that you could not afford to waste on a conversation like this. “Sorry, I’m running late. See you around!”

Bidding farewell to the group, who you were sure to see in just a few minutes, you bounded through the school and toward the back gymnasium. The net was already set-up, Akaashi standing toward the center as he warmed-up the spikers, matching up with their heights before the other team made their appearance.

You waved at him as you entered, holding up a bag containing half a dozen of Bokuto’s snacks, before placing it in the careful hands of Kaori. Akaashi thanked you genuinely, only to be surprised when you handed him an iced-latte in a cold glass from the store as well. He smiled, before putting it in the cooler for his undoubted headache later. Yukie looked at you with a curious smile, to which you threw two capri-suns at her - the drink secretly one of her favorites.

They thanked you before rushing back to positions and responsibilities, either continuing to warm-up or simply prep the gym for the other’s arrival. You did as you were told, then lined up to attention when the doors opened to greet your rival school.

While it was only a practice match, the team had already filled you in on the reason behind the unending tension between the two schools. Bokuto spun a tale of wild rivalry spanning generations while Akaashi stated plainly that they had not yet won against Itachiyama in recent years.

Seeing the germaphobe from earlier in the line-up, you stood quiet while the volleyball members silently introduced themselves. Your third-year captain, in his ever so passive-aggressive ire, tightly gripped the hand of the other Itachiyama captain. You fought the urge to roll your eyes and instead let your vision scan the line-up.

The tension was only more palpable during the game. Fukurōdani had practice matches before, but none so eerily… quiet.

Yes, there was intra-team communication and words of encouragement between teammates…  but nothing else.

During the practice match with Shinzen, your third-year teammates acted like old friends with some of those students. They even offered some pointers regarding serves between the two schools. And that school was categorized as a rival to your own as well. Shinzen was in the Fukurōdani group after all - they were your close rivals if anything.

But it seemed that the rivalry between Itachiyama and Fukurōdani ran even deeper than that.

Bokuto’s excitement, while usually cute and endearing, definitely contributed to the current atmosphere as well. Bokuto was naturally loud and with every point he scored, there was a chorus right after from yours truly. But, without an audience to drown out his cheers and the Fukurōdani third-years looking seriously quiet, the tiny Bokuto celebration grated on the nerves of the other team.

You watched the young man from earlier, mask gone from his face now and instead replaced with his own brand of quiet determination, as he ran up and smoothly spiked the ball. The action seemed so natural, it was only when the resounding slap signified again how loud and powerful he truly was, the ball smashing into the ground and landing somewhere behind the upper-risers.

That was incredible strength, you thought inwardly, feeling a similar awe you felt the first time you saw the true power behind Bokuto’s spike.

The awed expression on your face quickly squashed down to grimace, remembering this was the guy you had awkwardly crashed into earlier.

“What’s with that face?” Yukie asked, spying you from the corner of her eye. She stood parallel to you, both of you manning the standing scoreboard. Kaori was sitting with the coach, pen in hand as she took notes on the game.

You put back on your neutral visage as you flipped the score number, “That guy who just spiked, he was the one that I bumped into on the way here.”

“Sakusa-san?”

“Yeah...” You affirmed, trying to subtly point in his direction with your gaze alone.

She looked at you with an amused expression, patting you on the back in pity.

Fukurōdani lost the practice match.

And while a part of you was inwardly hissing, there was no doubt that both schools gave their all and the better ended up on top. The third-years commended the team, they were still in the process of finding their rhythm. After all, the points were not that far apart to being with. Having lost 2:1, you noted that the points were relatively close in all three sets.

Bokuto’s displeasure was obvious, complaining loudly that he should have worked on his jump-serve more, but still shaking everyone’s hands at the call of the game.

With both teams working to clean the gymnasium, you walked over to the net to help loosen it and fold the poles. Some of the team members of either side were lightly mingling, commending each other on certain skills while introducing themselves.

You spotted Sakusa in the corner, having helped put away the mats already and retreating to the spot furthest from the crowd. Fighting the urge to bemusedly chuckle at the action, your attention snapped to Komori approaching you, a water-bottle in hand.

“From your running earlier - thought you were a member of the track team.”

You smiled in a friendly manner, “Nope, just a manager of the volleyball club.”

He shot a smile back, “I see. I missed your name earlier...?”

Sheepishly rubbing the back of your neck, embarrassed over forgetting your introduction to your senior, “(L/N) (F/N), nice to meet you!”

“Nice to meet you, too!” He repeated back your words before adding, “How cute.”

You angled your head in question, surprised at his boldness and flabbergasted from replying.

He continued, “So, are you -”

“Yes, this is all good and well.” An arm swung across your shoulders as the owner cut him off, “But we better help our team out.”

Yukie shot a wink over her shoulder, whisking you to the other end of the room as someone else took over helping breakdown the net. You shot her a curious look, before your attention was grabbed back to the corner Sakusa was inhabiting.

It seemed Bokuto had found him, issuing a direct challenge to the other wing-spiker for their next match. Seeing your teammate, boisterous and loud, next to the quiet and narrow-eyed Sakusa was such a direct contrast; you had to remind yourself that they played the same role on their teams.

Bokuto grumbled the rest of the night, which only continued into the weekdays at school. You formed a study group for a particularly painful math class. And currently, said group had some vbc members crowded around a round table in the library. Most occupants preferred to spill the tea - Yukie and Konoha always had something regarding their second-year class. 

Which ironically left the younger two to herd the group. You tended to go with the flow. Which left Akaashi, the ever so smarty-pants honors student, to often lead the charge. (He also grumbled that you teased him about this fact, but you were also in the same honors classes yourself.)

You got in five pages worth of outlining before the conversation shifted. Focus on the class was easily torn as Haruki brought out a monthly volleyball magazine.

“Check it out, an entire profile on Sakusa Kiyoomi.” The libero stated, opening up the magazine as Konoha leaned over to look.

“Wow, lots of eyes are already on him.” Kaori stated.

“Anyone who saw him play during junior high would know he’s one to watch during Interhigh.” Haruki voiced.

“Well, I’m in the top four.” Bokuto muttered, arms crossed as he read along the magazine.

Akaashi sighed, putting down his pencil as his curiosity grabbed his attention, eyes straying to the article as well. Besides, Sakusa was a first-year just like the two of you, if he was this much of a threat it would be good to soak up any useful information on him

“The photograph looks a little far, don’t you think?” Yukie said with an unsure smile, pointing to the stiff Sakusa standing at least ten feet away from the photographer. “They couldn’t have zoomed in at all?”

“Maybe this is zoomed?” Konoha asked with a brow raised. 

You took a look and fought the urge to grimace aloud, you could barely tell it was him either. The action shot on one page was good, but for their interview photo he was covered completely with a mask and hat, just his eyes visible and still relatively far away from the photographer.

“Well, I don’t expect anything less from a germaphobe like him.” You commented, before turning back to your notebook. 

You saw multiple occupants’ expressions reel back in surprise before curiously looking toward you.

Kaori voiced their curiosity with a raised brow, “And how do you know that?”

“I - I bumped into him before the game!” You cursed your weak resolve, hands coming up in defense. 

“WHA?!” Bokuto asked, making you realize you only told Yukie about the prior encounter. The librarian shushed your group with a disapproving stare, before walking away. “You knew his weakness this whole time?”

Konoha laughed, “What are you going to do with that information? Sneeze on him during the next match?”

You shot eye contact with Yukie, the brunette simply shooting you teasing smirk as she leaned back in her chair. She was your older-senpai, but damn was the eccentric manager so ruthlessly teasing! Her love of food was the only clear read you could get off of her. Otherwise, it seemed like Yukie just loved to sow mischief.

“Wait. Weren’t you talking to their libero after the game? Was it Komori?” Haruki recalled, asking more out of curiosity then of seriousness.

“Um. Yes, well he introduced himself after I almost knocked over Sakusa-san.” You explained, nearly sweating buckets at some of the second-years’ gazes.

“Wait, knocked him over?” Konoha asked, glancing back down at his textbook to place a pen in it, then close it entirely.

“Well, I was running and didn’t see him when I turned the corner!” You continued to explain.

“Sure, sure.” Yukie waved off, sitting up and then sipping from her water bottle.

“I was rushing to bring the snacks - come on guys, you know this!” You defended, a sheepish smile on your face now as the other occupants varied from teasing to surprised.

“(L/N)-san, didn’t the teacher ask us to get something for her?” Akaashi cut in, already in the process of putting some of his study materials away.

You breathed a silent sigh in relief, agreeing and mimicking his actions as you readied to leave the sudden hot library. Yukie’s teasing was enough, but once Konoha and the rest started rolling it was all over from there.

“Yes, let’s get going.” You accepted immediately as you organized your school things, “See you all after class.”

Somehow, Akaashi was already up from the table and waiting for you at the door. You followed behind him quickly, going in the direction of your next class. Entering it, there were a few lingering students - some on their phone, others listening to music - but otherwise the two of you were alone.

You felt a small vibration from the pocket of your skirt, checking the messages from the infamous instigators of your group.

GC: Hoot Hoot ⊹⋛⋋(◐⊝◑)⋌⋚⊹

12:15 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)           Nice receive, Akaashi

12:15 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)           ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

12:15 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           cmon ahkaaashi; don’t you want to spend time with me? :C

12:15 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)            Enjoy your alone time ;)

12:15 haaaruki !           yah “studying” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Akaashi had a dead-panned expression back on his face, undoubtedly reading the same messages you had just skimmed through. The young man was so smart and quiet, and yet so silently sassy, you really cherished having him as your friend. Akaashi was the mother-hen of the group, undoubtedly, but you wondered how blessed your team was so to have such a patient and thoughtful setter in your ranks.

The two of you relished the silence of the room, sitting next to each other for this class, and resuming the earlier studying that you were interrupted from before. 

Life after this moved very quickly - thoughts of Itachiyama and the target named Sakusa was pushed in the back of your mind. Suddenly, your powerhouse of a volleyball club was having non-stop practice matches with others within the Fukurōdani Academy Group. Shinzen, known for their style of combination attacks, and Ubugawa, known for their serves, were two schools in Tokyo you often saw.

But, with them, came the introduction of Nekoma High School.

You almost felt bad for Akaashi after the first training camp with all three schools. Yes, you were familiar and friendly with the other schools, but with the introduction of middle-blocker Kuroo Tetsuro and his friend Kenma, it brought all sorts of adventures for your little group. He was certainly a sly cat, wielding the art of provocation like it was his second-skin. Fukurōdani had many practice matches with Nekoma throughout the spring semester, it was almost mentally jarring how quickly the Interhigh prelims crawled up on you.

Being friends with the other schools made the preliminary matches all the more intense - near screaming in support from the stands. You were friends with people in these other schools - managers whom you shared watermelon with in the scorching sun; and, forgetting volleyball, just teenagers whom you had seen at high school house parties throughout the semester - it was entirely personal during the prelims.

And while your school fell second to Itachiyama - you were excited to see your first ever nationals tournament.

To keep the teams organized in one spot, you were all staying in a swanky hotel not far from the sports center. It seemed to be a popular spot for other teams, since you had spotted familiar red and black athletic gear in the lobby when you entered. Nekoma was standing to the side by the chairs, Itachiyama littering the opposite area of the lobby.

Bokuto immediately bounded over to Kuroo and Kenma, Akaashi following behind begrudgingly, citing he did not want the spiker to wander off and get lost. Your eyes followed them, waving a hand at the Nekoma duo as you mentally weighed joining their conversation. Scanning the rest of the room, your eyes landed on Sakusa in the nearby corner with Komori hovering nearby.

Just as you made eye-contact with the libero, he waved you over with a friendly smile.

“Hey - good to see you, (L/N)-san.” Komori greeted, you waved back and made the small walk over.

“Hey to you too.” You replied, looking at both boys.

“Hi, (L/N)-san.” Sakusa stated back, as curt as ever. He was leaned against the wall, hands hidden in his pockets again. His eyes skipped over you quickly before looking away and scanning the room - you fought the urge to inwardly laugh at how easy he was to read at the moment.

For someone so collected and intimidating on the court, there was something so amusing at seeing him so on edge at the moment.

You were about to say something when someone called your name from behind. Waving a quick goodbye, you skipped back over to your team, seeing it was Akaashi who was herding you back to the group. 

It was only when you got in the elevator that you realized something - Sakusa remembered your last name.

Biting your lip in confusion, you thought to the last time you talked to either boy. You only gave your name to Komori during that first initial practice match - maybe Sakusa overhead and just had a good memory? Whatever the case may be, it was not the time to be looking into things. You shook your head, focusing on the present as you turned back to whatever Bokuto was talking about.

The coaches gave you time to organize yourselves before warming up in the nearby gym. With three managers for your team, it was agreed beforehand that you would fight on equal ground for the beds. Whoever won would get the bed to themselves while the other two would share. And yesterday, Kaori claimed herself the victor and you were sharing with Yukie.

Plopping your stuff down, you all got down to business as you organized the room quickly, heading out for auxiliary practice, and then herding the group at dinner.

After dinner, you were still bursting with energy. Excitement, anticipation - all of that was coursing through your veins for the events tomorrow. It seemed that the other managers were facing something similar, since neither had taken a bath yet and gotten ready for bed. Instead, Yukie was still in her outdoor clothes while Kaori was on her phone, scrolling through her social media feed.

Yukie turned to you with a mischievous smile, her brown eyes reflecting nothing but trouble when she finally asked, “So, seen any cute boys yet?”

You sputtered at the randomness of the question, “What?”

Kaori laughed, but then admitted. “Well, we are in the area with some of the best volleyball players in high school. Can’t deny some of them are handsome.”

You could not help the giggle in response, as Yukie added. “Hmm, you right. Some of them are looking so gooood.”

“Oh my god.” There were no words you had prepared for this moment.

Yukie looked at you before incling her head, “Come on, even Bokuto is looking mighty fine when he’s in the zone.”

“I -- “ You stuttered, was she looking for a response? 

“Don’t you think Bokuto has such a fine ass?” Yukie asked, “Like damn boy you looking thicc!”

Uhhhhh.

“Lay off.” Kaori came to your defense, or so you thought. “She’s more into the Akaashi-type, right?”

“Strong, but silent?” Yukie asked, “Quiet, but could easily snap your neck with his thighs?”

You blanched at the idea of your reserved friend doing any of the sort.

“No way! He’s just a friend.” You countered immediately.

“Hmmm, sure.” Yukie responded, “When Kuroo shuts his mouth, it makes me want to put it somewhere else.”

“Bruh.” You voiced as you laughed, slapping your reddening cheeks. 

Was this something they usually talked about during nationals? The conversation seemed so natural to the both of them - neither blushing or phased at talking about the other attractive men within your prefecture. Just thinking about any of them in a romantic light had you blushing, how on earth could they talk about this so naturally?

“True, but have you seen Sakusa?” Kaori countered, the conversation carrying on.

“Sakusa would be hotter if he allowed anyone within ten feet of him.” Yukie waved off before turning to you with a wink. “Well, I saw you talking to him today.”

You thought back to the interaction with a grimace, “More like a hello before he shut-down the conversation.”

“Think he’s cute?” Kaori asked, this time.

You thought back to him during the practice match, strong and confident when on the court and mask hidden away. But then again, you thought back to all your actual interactions, and grimaced.

You answered candidly, “I mean, I’m not blind. He’s attractive, but I barely know him.”

Yukie giggled, “I’m not saying you have to marry him!”

Kaori giggled and you felt your cheeks flame-up. You felt your embarrassment creep up your throat and blurted out, “Okay, he’s hella attractive and when he spikes it sets me on fire! Like ok - can he smack my ass like a drum??”

Yukie slapped you on the shoulder in jest as Kaori’s laughter got louder. Yukie replied, “Damn girl - I didn’t know you were into that sort of stuff.”

You were redder than Nekoma’s colors at this point, embarrassment at an all time high at having admitted something that even you were not aware of. Kaori and Yukie were so easy to talk to, so funny to be around, they really took away your one brain-cell sometimes.

“But I totally agree - when he snaps his wrist against the ball… well.” She ended the sentence with raised brows, both of you catching onto her mischievous face.

Kaori giggled and you could not help but laugh aloud at this point - you loved the other managers so much, they made wild conversations like this so easy. 

You started braiding your hair, conversation shifting to the boys in class at Fukurōdani. And while you admitted it was rather small-minded of you to say, you honestly could not remember a lot of the other student body outside of the volleyball club. You spent almost every free minute of your time on the club - many of the faces outside your class blurring to the side as your priorities lay elsewhere.

Just as you finished your hair, a small sound broke out in the room, Yukie picking up her phone as it vibrated against the bed. The brunette took one look at the caller ID, got up and winked at the two of you, before leaving the hotel room entirely. You turned to Kaori with a curious look, who simply shrugged and said it was probably some cute boy she was talking to.

You accepted it casually, before getting up yourself and putting on your outdoor shoes. You still had all this pent-up, enthused energy - maybe a run would do you good to calm your mind. Voicing this to the other manager, she agreed before laying back down on her bed.

The lobby areas were still littered with other volleyball club members in their casual clothes, some from other schools and some from your own. Some of the third-years were mingling, undoubtedly high-energy for this being one of the last few tournaments they would be participating in.

Putting headphones in, you started your run toward areas you personally knew and were relatively populated at this time of night. Certain areas of Tokyo were always bustling, and so you stuck to roads nearby the main one. Your mind, which was reeling only a few minutes before, was surprising blank during your run. Your focus was on the path ahead of you and the music surrounding you - it felt that simple somehow.

No team entered tournaments to lose - that was obvious. Everyone on this level of the competition had a hug leg over the average team - geniuses, prodigies, top spikers in the entire nation - they were all gathering here for the next few days.

Your team were the protagonists of the world - that was what you repeated in your head like a mantra for the past few days.

Fukurōdani were going to do more than just compete in nationals - they were going to win, you were confident.

“Pour all your soul into each ball.” You repeated, remembering the official banner for your powerhouse of a school.

The confidence in your team was overflowing, any lingering nerves flowing away as you continued on your focused run. And so when a crack of thunder was louder than your music - you reeled back in surprise and turned your attention upward at the sky.

Groaning, you ran over to the side of a building to huddle under a pagoda awning, other people doing the same as you and crowding the area. The weather quickly upturned from a calm night to a sudden downpour. There was nothing about rain in the forecast and this afternoon the sky was a pretty blue - had you just not noticed before?

Cursing your lack of foresight, you took out your headphones and stored them in the fanny pack across your chest. Recognizing the shops around this area, you were only ten minutes from the hotel by run. But, dodging the rain and ducking under pagoda’s would probably make it about a half hour. You considered briefly waiting out the rain, but also did not want to get stuck out late in the case that it did not let-up soon. 

Already decided, you were planning out your trek back to the hotel when you scanned everyone else around you. Turning to the other people taking refuge, you could not help the surprise on your face at seeming a familiar person huddled all the way in the back corner.

Sakusa, in all his might, was emanating serious waves of discomfort only a few feet away from you.

What were the odds of this happening? Was this some sort of karmic energy from the universe, due to the conversation you had earlier?

You walked over the spiker, waving a hello and receiving a nod in greeting.

“Looks like we had the same idea, Sakusa-san.” You started, receiving nothing from the conversation but a blank stare.

Boy was he hard to talk to.

Not to be deterred, you continued. “I know the area pretty well. Feel free to come with me, so you’re not waiting out the rain too late?”

Sakusa nodded again silently, and when you turned your head in confusion on instinct, he voiced himself this time. “Thanks.”

You felt a smile crawl up your face as you turned, dodging between some of the street shops’ canopies and awnings in your quick pace. He followed you closely, not wanting to get any of the accursed rain on his bodice, you guessed. Still, it was hard to keep track of someone right behind you. 

This situation was altogether so strange - who would have thought that this would be the way you would be ending your day??

Not used to the silence - after all, your usual company was always bouncing with energy - you joked as you turned to him, “I guess this is where I should insert some proclamation of rivalry here?”

The only thing that signified he heard you was by the quirk of a smirk at the corner of his lip - was that amusement?? you wondered.

Stopping at the corner of the street, you had to run the crosswalk and make your way to the cafe’s awning across the way. You voiced this as you both waited for the stoplight to switch over.

“Are you nervous for tomorrow?” You questioned, filling in the dead air.

“No.”

“Ah, what was I thinking - a nationally ranked spiker like you…” You drew out sheepishly.

“No, as in my team does not play until the day after.” Sakusa explained, making you groan. You forgot - Itachiyama was seeded after all. 

“Oh, my bad.” You stated, losing all your earlier confidence to try to speak to him. 

Whatever expression was on your face must have made him feel bad, you assumed, since Sakusa turned to you and continued. “But I am looking forward to fighting Wakatoshi-kun.”

The inward book in your mind flipped open, recognizing the name and attempting to find the correct team it was associated with. “Ah, that nationally ranked spiker from Shiratorizawa Academy.”

“Yes, he is… a good benchmark to play against.” Sakusa explained, making you nod in agreement. “But our priority will be watching Fukurōdani’s match tomorrow morning.”

“Oh?”

“You took a set from us during the Representative Playoffs. We won’t let it happen again.”

You smiled at his words - just Itachiyama and Sakusa himself as a whole felt like a goal. The team was the only one ranked above yours in the prefecture. It was your goal to beat his team and him especially. Maybe it was the fact that Bokuto and him were competing on ranking that made it that much more intimate, but it was easy to look at Sakusa as a target more than just who he was: a human.

And so hearing his small admission that Fukurōdani was a strong rival, after dominating your school for so long, you could not help but smile at his candor.

“We’re there to win nationals.”

He raised a brow at your words, and while you wondered if you had overstepped your boundaries for a second, a smirk grew on Sakusa's face as he simply responded. “Ah.”

You watched the countdown timer to the other side of the street, signifying it was soon time for the both of you to break out in a spring to the other side. Both of you readied yourselves just as a car squealed past the corner, trying to beat the clock and make it before it turned red. 

It all happened so quickly, eyes darting around the area to see if there was anything you could duck behind. Chairs and tables, the usually bustling Tokyo was already wrapped up in plastic and stowed away. There was no getting away from the large splash of water on the both of you - drenching you and Sakusa instantly.

The groan from the spiker was loud above the city bustle, and if not for your mutual distress, it would have made you laugh in amusement. Sakusa was inspecting his clothes, obvious disdain and surprise on his visage. Figuring it was whatever at this point, you grabbed his upturned palm and led him to a cafe area nearby. It was closed at this point, but there was a wide awning area that would be empty by now.

You led him to one of the empty garden chairs and sat him down, uncaring if he was annoyed at you pushing him around. It was your team mom instincts kicking in at this point.

Reaching into your fanny pack, you took out some of the emergency wipes and offered the pack to him. He took it readily, taking out a few and going at his hands immediately. With your on-hand handkerchief, you patted him down at the shoulders, not noticing how close the two of you were at this point.

Sakusa said nothing to your actions, not even when you moved from his shoulders to the exposed skin of his neck, wiping off the dirty street water. The initial mother adrenaline was quickly wearing off as you stood over him, surprised that he was letting you do this after all. The rosy tinge on your cheeks was growing with every second of that lingering thought.

“Nervous?” Sakusa called you out, making you stiffen up your posture. Thankfully, he did not push the subject and instead said, “I don’t understand you. Your team hates me. Shouldn’t you just be letting me get sick?

“I wouldn’t do that, especially not even to you.” You waved off the thought, smiling as you did so. “We’re going to beat you with our own skill.”

He looked up at you from his spot, initially saying nothing to your words as you moved to take out another wet-wipe from the pack. Sakusa stopped your action, putting a hand over yours and starting, “You should be using some for yourself.”

You lightly pushed it aside, not unkindly. “It’s fine; I don’t care much. Besides, this matters more to you.”

He said nothing, letting go of your wrist, but not moving away out of your range. You took that as Sakusa’s silent acceptance, moving the wipe back to his neck area and even patting him down on the cheek. His eyes never left yours, making you wonder what could possibly be going on in that head of his.

The moment was so strangely intimate, you were silently proud of your usually easy-to-tease demeanor staying calm. Once you were done, you debated taking the seat next to him when he finally looked away. Taking a look at the world around you, the sudden downpour had actually let-up to a slight drizzle. 

You voiced your observation, recommending that you make your way back to the hotel before it possibly got worse. He nodded silently in agreement, breaking out into a light sprint toward your destination side-by-side.

By the time you arrived it was already late night, most of the lobby thankfully empty. You were not sure what you would say if Bokuto saw you walk in with his rival completely drenched. The squelch of your sneakers was obvious against the granite floor, making you wince at how others probably saw the two of you right now.

Sakusa bid you farewell with a small word and wave, heading toward an elevator at the other end of the hall. You did the same, before feeling the niggling feeling that someone had their eyes on you. Heading to the elevators, you turned to your peripheral and saw Yukie, sitting at one of the lobby tables with some random guy across from her.

Her face was alight with obvious mischief, her smirk alone was enough sign that she was going to be questioning you about this situation immediately. You winced at her expression, turning toward the elevator doors and waiting for the ding! to signify you were free from her eyes.

A thorough bath later, you were surprised the next day to see that Yukie had not questioned you at all. Instead, all energy was focused on nationals and the upcoming teams you were going to have to play against. 

Fukurōdani Academy was a powerhouse in itself and hearing the loud cheers surrounding your side of the court was enough to lift the entire team's spirits. Your audience section was fit to the nine’s - including a marching band, a specific fan cheering area, and even cheerleaders.  The team played through their games proudly, passion radiating from the team as you made it to the quarter-final on the third day.

You never got to play Itachiyama.

The third-years were retiring.

The silence on the bus was mentally jarring - no one expected your nationals journey to end this soon. Even Yukie, who was always quick on her feet when it came to comforting the other members, was eerily silent the way back to the hotel.

The only person who was still remarkably confident, was signified by the strong words Bokuto uttered when they first left the court.

“Nothing here was a mistake.” Bokuto started, mind in his thoughts as his back faced the team. You were in the middle of handing a spare hand-towel toward Haruki when you turned to the ace. “Your tosses were incredible under the pressure.”

The entirety of the team turned to the usual mood maker, one who was so easily swayed on the court over simple things, now voicing his introspective words.

Bokuto turned to the rest of you, “We will come back here next year and carve the rest of the way.”

Akaashi nodded from beside you, other second-years agreeing with their newly determined ace. The third-year captain, now sporting an anguished smile, walked over to Bokuto to place a hand on his shoulder. The other older members followed suit, proud of their young owl growing up right before their eyes.

After the game, you split up at the hotel to return to your rooms and shower. Getting ready for the night ahead of you, the third-years stated that they were going to take the team out for dinner after the strong season.

Yukie hopped in the shower first as Kaori and you packed up some of your room. The team was still going to stay at the hotel until the end of the tournament, but your long notebooks and team journals were of no use now. Combination attacks and details on the third-years were now a thing of the past. 

You had to fight the sob in your throat when you closed the folder on your captain one last time.

The silent hotel room, which was filled with giggles and teasing only hours before, was palpable against you and Kaori’s attempts to stay calm. She was affected moreso than you, having spent the last two years with the current team.

You were so occupied in your thoughts, you almost missed the silent vibration in your pocket, a notification dinging from your social media platform on Instabook.

Hey. Are you back in the hotel?

What was Sakusa doing, messaging you now of all times? 

Waving the thought away, you typed: Yeah. What’s up?

I have something for you - where are you?

The tendril of suspicion shot through you, but Sakusa was definitely not the type to kick you while you were down. You messaged him back your room details, earning back a simple ok omw and nothing else to signify just why he was coming here.

Yukie was still in the shower when you stepped out. Sakusa really was before you, in all his silent glory. Sporting his usual face mask, he took something out of his pocket and thrust it toward you.

“It’s only fair, (L/N)-san.” Sakusa stated, a familiar pack of wet-wipes in his hand outstretched toward you. 

You felt your smile grow, your earlier saddened disposition breaking at the strange sight. “That’s really not necessary.”

“Just take it.” Sakusa said as he grabbed your sleeve and placed it in your empty hand. 

“Well, okay.” You said with a slight chuckle in your voice.

“I meant to give it to you at the complex, but..”

“Yeah.” You finished for him, the conversation coming to a silence. “Thank you, Sakusa-san.”

He looked at you with an unwavering gaze, “Sakusa is just fine.”

“Then just (L/N) is fine too.” You added, finally feeling that you were coming to terms to some sort of odd friendship with the spiker. Holding up your phone, you motioned to it without voicing your question. “So we don’t have to rely on random appearances?”

“Ah.” He agreed, taking out his phone as you exchanged chat-ID’s.

That was the end of the conversation, him waving goodbye once it was over and walking down the hall to the stairwell. A part of you watched him go, almost smiling when you realized that of course the athlete would opt for the stairs when you were on the tenth floor.

You tried to silently enter back into the room, Kaori in the shower this time as Yukie was packing up her things. Leaning your back against the door, you tried to placate your undoubtedly rosy blush - you did not need a mirror to know that you were adorned with one now.

“Look at you - you think you’re slick?” The smirk on her face was enough warning that you were in danger, “I saw you two from the peephole.”

“He was just dropping off a gift.” You state, as if that would sate her curiosity at all. Instead, she stood up at attention.

She had one eye narrowed at you, “Right, of course. What else was I thinking - other than the totally normal gift-giving for two platonic members of rival volleyball teams.”

“Yup.” You nodded with a reserved smile, before making your way further into the room.

Yukie pushed the conversation as she got on the bed, “Are you secretly dating Sakusa?”

You flushed immediately, “It’s not like that!”

“And what is it like?”

“We’re just… friends?” You bit out, the lack of confidence even obvious to your own ears. Was that a question or a statement?

The relationship you had with the young man was strange. Were you friends? It was more like mutual acquaintances who happened to have a totally-but-also-not intimate moment. You could never really tell what he was thinking - being of very few words. 

“And suddenly you’ve convinced me.” Yukie teased, before going silent as Kaori entered the room. You took this as your escape, readying your stuff quickly and entering the shower area before she could continue.

Thankfully, Yukie dropped the subject while you were around others. Your previous, almost giddy expression, came back to a silently gloomy one as you went for your last dinner with the Fukurōdani third-years.

Any previously unshed tears slammed to the forefront when seated around your peers. Even while sad and crying, your team was loud and scorching down food in the small ramen bar. The third-years thanked you all for your efforts, for the growth you had since the start of the school year, and sent you off for the new year.

April swung around quicker than you would like. You were a newly minted second-year, priorities quickly changing almost as quickly. The questions from guidance counselors and coaches were unending: asking you about your future, what you wanted to do, what electives classes were you going to take. It was all preparation before your final year - it was almost mentally jarring against the happy and almost innocent vibe from your initial year of a high school.

Sakusa’s phone number untouched since the day outside your hotel room. 

Bokuto rising to the role of captain in his third-year was no question. But seeing Akaashi, now a second-year Vice-captain, it set all your “uwu’s on fire,” as Yukie dubbed it. He earned the role, without a doubt, but seeing the two together was so strangely heart-warming.

Bokuto and Akaashi were a strange pair, but they got along together so well, it was hard to imagine anyone else on your team with these roles. Akaashi mother hen’ed you all, but there were times that it seemed the young setter could almost read Bokuto’s mind. 

They were a perfect match, you often teased. 

Akaashi would often stare at you blankly when you reiterated this, but Bokuto would only fuel the fire. The duo were almost always in immediate distance to one another, oftentimes your captain would swing his arm across Akaashi’s shoulders or just initiate some time of close distance. After all, they were roommates now in the dorms, that was not just because they were captain and vice, you had a feeling.

It made you wonder what else was there beyond the surface.

But, you still had your own job to do as manager. By the end of the year, Fukurōdani would be losing two of its precious managers. And so, here you were, on the hunt for a first-year to take on the role and get used to the responsibilities of being manager to a powerhouse school.

Your team was focused on finding their rhythm, endless individual practices to get the first-years up to speed with the Fukurōdani standard. The regular line-up was still mostly comprised of third and second years, but first-year Wataru Onaga showed lots of promise. Standing at 191 centimetres, he earned his way to starting middle blocker on the team.

On occasion, you would be found in the library with other members of the volleyball team, studying for classes and researching upcoming teams in the preliminary matches.

You noticed how Sakusa earned himself a formal ranking among the top three aces of the country - Itachiyama now a heavy favorite to win in nationals. He was growing in regard very quickly, attention on him was a far cry from the initial rumors surrounding his first-year. Now he was on the cover of Volleyball monthly, pages dedicated to an expose of his career.

Would he even remember you?

Thoughts of the spiker were pushed away again with the onslaught of practice matches with other schools within the Fukurōdani Academy Group. Captain Kuroo was no better than regular Kuroo when it came to being the instigator. If anything, it seemed like the cat hung around your group of friends even more now.

He was often seen at group hangouts, whether just going to the mall or the local arcade. It was interesting, to say the least, the combination of your loud owl and the conniving cat, their two silent wards in tow.

You had a practice match with Itachiyama around the corner. And while you told yourself that you were not disappointed in your waning friendship(?) with Sakusa, you could not help the lightened feeling in your heart when he took the time to greet you before the match. Komori waved at you as well, before stretching and getting ready.

You watched the sets with careful eyes, Yukie taking notes alongside you. Almost everything was documented - how many times Bokuto was blocked, how many successful jump serves, service aces - and this was for both sides of the court. You could not help the way your eyes were drawn to Sakusa, his flexible wrist combined with his power making a combination the bane of your middle blockers.

Yukie caught you a few times, saying nothing but wagging her eyebrows at you in a wavy motion.

Losing three to two sets, you sighed and moved to help clean-up the gymnasium. Wheeling the scoreboard to the storage room with Yukie, all volleyball members were moving about the gym to make sure it was properly organized. You stepped out to check the hammock cart holding the volleyballs, counting them to ensure that none of them belonged to the rival school. 

Should you say something more to Sakusa?

You paused, looking up from the volleyballs and frowning at yourself.

Wait… Why did it even matter? Why did you even want to talk to him? Yes, you were on friendly terms with the ace. But why did you seek him out so much? You were friends with Kuroo, so did not feel the same draw to the middle blocker as you did now? 

Why was your mind so intent on just something with the ace?

Mind reeling with these questions, it was to your surprise when he approached you.

“Hey.”

“Hi.” You replied in a much smaller voice, attempting to put a smile back on your face, as if you needed to hide your earlier train of thought.

“Are you available this weekend?”

“Uh, wait what?” You could not help the incredulous words coming out of your mouth. 

Seriously what??? How do you go from weeks of not talking to this??

Yukie was a few paces away from you, opting to walk away from your conversation to give some privacy, after all the two of you were standing in a gymnasium filled with two bustling volleyball teams. But she undoubtedly heard that last question since her head whipped around back in your direction.

Seeing that Sakusa was actually waiting for a response, you thought back to your plans with Bokuto, Akaashi, and Kenma group to play the usual Mario Kart at the latter’s house.

“No, I’m free.” You responded.

Yukie laughed, before walking away entirely, as to not give away her eavesdropping.

“Ok. I’ll text you the details for this weekend.”

Not able to hide your surprise, you let out a sound of uncertainty as you raised your palms. “Wait, for what?”

“Hang-out.” Sakusa stated, as if it was such a natural event. “Komori suggested inviting you so I did.”

You dropped your hands, letting them fall to the sides and letting out a small, “Huh.”

He waved you off, saying he was going to text you the details tomorrow, before joining back with his team. Yukie’s face was indescribable and Haruki sported a similar expression only a few paces away.

Their questioning gazes were only pocketed for later, passed the time the coaches had given pointers and tips to members of the team. Eventually, when the other school had all packed up and left, the third-years were quick to bombard you with questions.

“HAAAA! (L/N), how could you hide this from us?!” 

“You two have been close, this whole time?”

“Not dating, my ass.” Yukie teased as she crossed her arms.

Akaashi placed a hand on your shoulder, his calm voice cutting above the rest. “What was that?”

“Honestly, I don’t know.” You answered candidly.

Bokuto and Haruki turned their heads in confusion while Yukie looked at you with a face asking you, really?

“Yeah, we haven’t actually spoken to each other since nationals.”

“Wait, really? That long ago?” Yukie asked this time, genuinely surprised.

“Yeah. That invite really feels… out of nowhere.” You explained, your own confusion evident on your visage and reflecting back on the other volleyball team members.

“Eh, it’s probably nothing.” Bokuto shrugged as he walked away, “We hangout with other schools all the time.”

Yukie held a flat-expression toward the ace’s retreating back, Haruki following behind him with a shrugging expression. Akaashi and the brunette manager turned back to you, the female grabbing your hand as she did.

“Okay, really?” 

Akaashi sighed, grabbing your attention. “Text me if you’re uncomfortable.”

“Wow, look at you Mr. Chivalrous.” Yukie commented, making Akaashi roll his eyes before turning to you seriously. You nodded in affirmation, to which he accepted and walked away.

You waved goodbye to the other members as they closed up the gymnasium, walking with the other managers back to the female dorms. 

Yukie was not letting it go at all, repeating her question from earlier. “Okay, really?”

You smiled this time, voice mocking as you responded. “Yeah, really.”

“What happened?” Kaori asked.

“Sakusa-san asked her out on a date.” Yukie spun the tale.

“It’s not a date.” You cut in.

“Oh yeah, then why are you smiling so giddy?” Yukie asked with wide, accusatory eyes.

“Because it’s… Shut up.” You stated between nervous laughter, “He asked me to hangout with a group - it includes their libero Komori-san.”

“Maybe he likes you.” Kaori commented, to which Yukie agreed vigorously.

“Do not put these assumptions in my head.” You stated with a loud sigh, head angled toward the sky at their words.

Yukie sighed back, “Don’t deny the possibility.”

You shrugged it off, knowing that there was no ending to their teasing at this point. You repeated the truth in your head like a mantra: he was nothing more than a friend. It was not worth looking into every single interaction you had with the young man - after all, he was rather strange when it came to social interactions to begin with. 

Ironically, you had to think that the others did not know him like you did. He was straight-up with his words, not fully understanding the meaning of it or how it affected others. If Sakusa wanted to do something or felt something, he would lay it out straight - that’s just the type of person he was.

And you would not be looking into the words between the lines.

But it was increasingly hard to do this when both Yukie and Kaori invaded your room Saturday morning, stating that your usual plain clothes would just not do for a day like this. Two hours later, your hair was in beachy waves and your planned “plain” outfit was replaced with a casual, knee-length springy dress over a white shirt.

What if this really was nothing but a casual encounter for him? Would your outfit be more forward then you intended?

Any of your self-conscious questions were too late, since before you knew it you were already on a train to the destination by Kichijoji. You had a few more stops to your destination, the packed train-car as busy as ever. Distracting yourself from those previous thoughts, you whipped out your phone to check the messages that had been pouring in since early morning.

GC: Hoot Hoot ⊹⋛⋋(◐⊝◑)⋌⋚⊹

11:11 Kaori _へ__(‾◡◝ )>           Look at how cute (F/N)-chan looks           Attached: cutie.jpg

11:11 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)          She should dress like this every day!! (*•̀ᴗ•́*)و ̑̑

11:11 haaaruki !           WOAH :O 11:11 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           Hey hey hey 

11:11 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           look at you ;)

11:12 ahKASHi (๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤)           That would seem difficult considering (F/N)-san’s sleep schedule and the amount of time it takes for her to get ready. 11:13 Konoha(gakure) (•́ᴗ•́๑)           damn girl u look so pretty!!

11:13 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           I still can’t believe she abandoned us for saks >:(

11:13 Kaori _へ__(‾◡◝ )>           you can’t stop her from dating dad

11:13 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)           well you know what they say bro’s before hoes

11:13 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           eye-

11:13 ahKASHi (๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤)           But otherwise, (F/N) looks beautiful today.

11:13 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           >>:C

You skipped to the end, scrolling through at least a few dozen more messages that ranged the topic from the picture of you getting ready to the supposed Mario Kart tournament that you were now missing out on. Typing in your response:

12:35 mother-hen^2 (ﾟ⊿ﾟ)           Sorry boys, had to look cute for today only ;)

12:35 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)           IT’S A DATE!!! I KNEW IT!

12:35 Konoha(gakure) (•́ᴗ•́๑)           BO YOU OWE US YAKISOBA BREAD

12:35 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           ITS A DATE??

12:35 haaaruki !!           be safe mom!!

12:36 mother-hen^2 (ﾟ⊿ﾟ)           it’s NOT a date  (・-・)

12:36 BROkuto ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ           HA

12:36 Konoha(gakure) (•́ᴗ•́๑)           bruh 

12:36 yukie-yukie (｡♥‿♥｡)           JUST YOU WAIT

12:36 ahKASHi (๑ᵕ⌓ᵕ̤)           Text me the moment you need an out.

You rolled your eyes as you pocketed your phone into your side-bag, leaning into the halting train as it crawled to a stop on the Keiou Inokashira Line. Walking out and looking for any telltale signs of your friend, you scanned the train station with wandering eyes as you walked out.

But, it was not necessary, since Komori’s light brown hair was an easy pick in the crowd. However, next to him was a volleyball player that you could easily pick from the bustling station. While Japanese men were generally around 170 centimetres, seeing Sakusa’s curly mop of hair high above the crowd was enough for you to follow.

It seemed they saw you immediately as well, Komori waving at you to come over while Sakusa merely kept his eyes trained on you. With them were a handful of other members of the Itachiyama volleyball club, from the players to their female manager, you recognized them from practice matches.

They invited you into the group of teenagers quickly, as if nothing was strange at all, waving at you with smiles before shooting looks at both Komori and Sakusa. 

What the hell was happening?

You had a feeling in the back of your mind that something was happening around you, that they all knew something that you did not know.

You walked along with the group into the popular neighborhood of Kichijoji - the group traveling from food stand to souvenir stand. Their female manager was so friendly, unlike how seriously quiet she was when visiting. She even asked to touch your hair at one point, saying it looked so bouncy and pretty today.

“The tracksuits don’t do any of us justice.” She complained, “But you look so nice today, (L/N)-san!”

You smiled at her words, “Thanks. We had an off-day today too. So I figured why not.”

“Well, it looks great. Don’t you think so too, Kiyoomi?”

The sudden question had you reeling back in surprise, turning to the black-haired teen. Why was he suddenly being brought into this? What were they trying to do?

But the thousands of questions in your brain came to a halt when Sakusa turned to you and simply said. “You look nice.”

“Thanks.” You replied, more out of reflex than truly getting his words. So in your head, you failed to notice the teasing smile she shot her ace, before turning away back to the rest of the group.

They gathered around the menu of a popular crepe stand, you left standing there in surprise as the group continued on without you. Sakusa stayed beside you, before taking a step and inclined his head toward the rest.

Shaking your head away from the niggling feeling in the back of your mind, you lightly jogged to catch up with the rest, finding a pace between Sakusa and Komori. 

The brunette turned to during your walk, “You’re probably really surprised to be here.”

“Yeah…”

Komori chuckled, a hand on his neck as he lightly muttered beneath his breath. “Honestly, I’m surprised he did it.”

“Did what?” You asked with a raised brow.

“Nothing important.” He waved off, “I’m just glad you were able to join our group today.”

Deciding not to push it, you instead said. “Well, thanks for the invite.”

The group’s conversation ranged from the food stalls, to your long awaited destination at the billiards club. The building had, true to its name, billiards tables and other vintage arcade machines. 

You were unsure where to place yourself within this group, obvious inside jokes that you would not understand between some of the other members. Thankfully, Komori and their female manager were very quick to try to get you to weigh in on the conversation.

“Well, I think Shrek is funnier in Japanese.” She stated it clear as day, as if a fact. You had to stop yourself from chuckling, one hand on the pool cue since it was your turn to go.

“But it’s not funnier than Cars.” Another countered.

“Have you heard Mater in the original movie?” You replied after hitting the ball, watching it not follow the path you had intended to hit it in at all. “That’s the one English dub I’ll accept.”

She smiled before arguing, “As if a cowboy accent is funnier than Shrek with a Jojo’s voice?”

You attempted to dead-pan your face, Sakusa stepping up to the billiards table after you. “We’re Japanese. We all have Jojo’s voice.”

“Alright Pikachu, calm down.”

You held a mock-offended hand to your chest, not able to hide the laughter at her jest. Despite being a beginner at billiards, and getting absolutely wrecked by everyone else playing, you were having fun with the random group.

This was not just the Itachiyama volleyball club - a fan favorite to win nationals.

These were high school teenagers, enjoying their free day off.

It was like a wide-awakening of your perspective. After all, you went to a powerhouse school yourself. When people saw Bokuto, saw Fukurōdani as a whole - how many times were people intimidated at Prelims just because of your team’s reputation? Taking Itachiyama off its pedestal was the same and it was hard to remind yourself of this fact.

But finally putting names to faces, personalities to people, you let it sink in that they were not that unlike you and your team.

After billiards, you continued with the group to a hot-pot restaurant a few blocks away. Komori hung especially around you, you noted inwardly. Was it to keep you from feeling left out of the group? But why were you even with this group to begin with?

Wait.

Didn’t Komori call you cute during your first encounter?

You felt something inside you inwardly swell and then sag. Were you here because Komori wanted you to be here? Even though your direct invitation came from Sakusa, the ace reasoned that it was at Komori’s suggestion. Were you invited here to get closer to the libero?

Despite being surrounded by the loud vbc members, their eagerness to eat bustling in both action and conversation, you felt yourself sag at the realization.

They were trying to get you closer to Komori?

You inwardly slapped yourself on the head for being so closed-minded. Not that he was a bad guy - he was the best libero in the entire country after all. Volleyball skills aside, Komori was trying his best to make you comfortable in the group. He was naturally outgoing, friendly, and had been the reason behind your invite in the first place.

But another part of your mind, the part that you had been trying to close off for so long, could not help but glance over to Sakusa and hoped that he had been the reason.

The silent ace caught your gaze, making you turn away immediately and flush at being caught.

It was… disappointing.

But you failed to notice how Sakusa kept his gaze on you, the female manager watching this interaction entirely with amused eyes.

You were still trapped in your thoughts. You had gotten your hopes up after all, despite saying to all the other members that it truly was not that way between the two of you.

And now it was fully true.

Entering the restaurant, the female manager, having the foresight to call ahead to reserve for your large group, you deliberated where you wanted to sit at the table. You went to take a seat next to the manager, to which she motioned to Komori in a none-too-subtle way, to instead take the seat before you could finish your question.

That left a single seat left on this side - the corner one that was only next to Komori.

Of course they were trying to set you up with him, why else did you think otherwise?? You almost slapped yourself on the head for how tunnel-minded you were before this.

You took the seat, shooting a smile toward Komori that did not quite reach your eyes. But, to your surprise, the brunette muttered a small excuse of having to go to the bathroom or something, you could not catch it exactly since it was so quick. And instead, the ace that had been plaguing your thoughts for the last few minutes, had plopped down into the spot.

You snapped your head forward, grabbing at the menu and stating that it all looked good. The female manager smiled at you, more like smirked, before joining in the conversation of what she wanted to order.

As per your team mom instinct™, you took out your hand sanitizer and offered it to the other table members. 

“Thank you, (L/N)-chan!” She replied, taking the small container and using some. You offered it to the rest and let it pass around. “You even beat Sakusa offering it to us.”

Komori took the seat across from you when he returned, adding to the conversation quickly. “That’s (L/N)-chan’s?”

“Yeah. Otherwise, it would’ve been paired with a lecture from our dear ace here.” The female added. “It’s almost like you complete each other.”

Wait, what?

You smiled awkwardly, eyes landing on the silent Sakusa who had yet to say anything.

“Ah. I have the same brand.” He said when the bottle made its way back.

Okay, not what you were expecting at all. You took it from his hands, a small grin still on your face, using it before storing it away.

A few minutes in and it was clear that members of the table were breaking out into their smaller conversations. To your left was a wall and so that left the silent Sakusa or Komori across from you, who was trying hard to converse with only the person next to him.

“I saw the article about you in volleyball monthly.” You started. “Congrats on officially being one of the top spikers in the country.”

Sakusa turned to you when you first spoke, replying. “Thanks, but it’s brought a lot of annoying attention.”

He was actually talking to you? Stop. He’s human too.

“I could imagine - scouts, fangirls - it’s never ending.” You responded. “A lot of girls like to hang around and watch practice matches for Bokuto, I’d assume it’s the same.”

“It’s annoying.” He stated curtly, “They’re dirtying up the gym with their outdoor shoes every time.”

Of all things… you thought inwardly with an amused grin.

“Being so popular now, there’s probably tons of people who approach you based solely on reputation. I hope you don’t think that of me.” You stated.

“I don’t.” He said back just as quickly.

You smiled, before continuing the conversation. “Even if their energy is misplaced, I can’t help but agree that you’ve accumulated a lot of earned attention.”

“Oh?”

“Well, yeah.” Your smile widened unconsciously, “I mean, you’re more than just the title. You were a good spiker before any labels told anyone that.”

Sakusa looked at you, in what looked like a flat expression. 

What you did not know was how thoroughly he was scanning your face, just to gauge how genuine your words were. You went to rival schools? Other schools in the prefecture were so quick to antagonize him and his team. After all, Bokuto made his feelings obvious during the last practice match. And yet you were willing to just hangout, of all things, with people you hardly knew? So willing to compliment the ace with the largest target on his back??

Your actions confused a realist like him.

Why even bother to be nice to him way back then? Why try to keep in touch? Why be here today?

And even more so, why did he want to know the answer to these questions so badly?

“(L/N)-chan, what would you usually be doing on your off days?” The manager broke you out of your thoughts.

“Well, today was supposed to be a Mario Kart tournament with some of the Nekoma kids.” You thought back to your earlier plans. “As crazy as it is, we tend to just lounge around and play video games with Kuroo and Kenma.”

“Ah, that’s right. Nekoma is in the Fukurōdani Academy Group as well.” She stated, her voice lowering toward the end.

“Yeah, but we’re pretty close to Kuroo and rest beyond volleyball. I don’t know how, but our captains all get along like frat bro’s.” You reminisced to the last interaction, “But at least with all the managers together, we have five mother hen’s, six including Akaashi, to guide the group.”

She laughed, before biting her lip.

You noticed the action and questioned, “Something wrong?”

“No.” She tried to wave off, “Well. I don’t know. I’m kind of jealous.”

You let out an incredulous snort before leaning forward. “Why?”

“You get along really well with the other schools in the prefecture. Enough so that I see you guys,” she motioned to you in a circular motion, you took this to signify the Fukurōdani team as a whole, “Like everywhere on social media.”

“Oh?”

“Parties, weekends, you name it. Even Masaki-san, who is infamous for being so angry looking, posted you and the rest out swimming last summer break.” You thought back to the event, the name of the now captain of the Ubugawa High volleyball team jumping out at you.

House parties… Wasn’t that a regular high school thing to do? And while you were all responsible teenagers with a lot to lose, the team did indulge in various friendly gatherings that did include teens across multiple schools in the prefecture.

You hadn’t said anything yet, so she continued. “Meanwhile, our coach has us play against college teams since he insists it’s better practice. We don’t really play with anyone else in the prefecture other than you guys - and you hate us.”

“That’s not true.” You cut in immediately, to which she raised a brow. “Believe me. The only outspoken one would be Bokuto and none of that is beyond surface level - he’s a really nice guy and would never actually hate anyone.”

You continued, “It may just seem that way since we’re immediate rivals. But I honestly had no idea that it made you guys feel so isolated.”

“Yeah…” She admitted, her voice trailing off at the end.

“It doesn't have to stay this way. After all, you were nice enough to invite me out now.” You replied, a bright smile back on your face. “Why don’t we exchange numbers?”

She radiated a smile reflecting your own, taking out her phone and quickly inputting your digits in. “Wow, you’re so friendly.”

“Don’t worry about it.” You replied.

She held her smile for a few more seconds, before her eyes slid over to the silent ace between you two. 

“I’m so glad Sakusa wanted to invite you with us today.”

You looked toward him as well, Sakusa meeting your eyes before turning away.  “Uh, I was glad I was able to join.” 

“Yeah, well. It’s no wonder he…”

Her voice came to a halt when the ace looked straight at her, the waves of warning enough for even you to feel, without having to see his expression.

Sakusa wanted you to be here?

“He…?” You questioned, to which she smiled and shrugged, not completing her previous thought.

The rest of the dinner went without any special events - even holding light conversation with Itachiyama’s ace next to you. Conversation with Sakusa was curt, but he meant no harm. If you had to describe it, he was dense in the way of conversation, similar to Bokuto and yet for the opposite reasons. 

Bokuto was so extroverted that he got along with people so easily. But, it often led to him mistakenly leading on girls for how friendly he was. Meanwhile, on the other side of the spectrum, introverted Sakusa kept to himself because that was where he was comfortable, not because he thought others beneath him.

You felt your heart swell at having learned a little bit more about the ace.

After dinner, the nightsky reflected back at you as you went to part ways with the group. Dorms in opposite directions, you were surprised when Sakusa offered to walk with you to the train station. 

And while your heart swelled at the implications, Sakusa reasoned it was only fair since he was the one that invited you out. Now that it was late, it may not be safe for you to be out late and it would be on his head if something happened.

His manager laughed, while Komori just sighed, muttering that he was hopeless.

She bid you farewell with a tight hug, saying you should text her when you get home. The rest waved at you amicably before walking off in the opposite direction. 

Whatever the reasoning may be, there was no logical reason as to why a germaphobe like him would sit directly next to you on the train back home. Your shoulders were even touching, but neither of you voiced this fact. 

“Today was actually really fun.” You started, turning to him on your right. There were only a few other people taking this line and they were mostly crowded around the opposite end of your train-car. “Thanks for inviting me.”

“You don’t have to say thanks so many times.”

“Did I?” You asked with a sheepish smile, “I honestly didn’t notice, but I do mean it.”

“Good.” His eyes bore into your own so seriously, “Because I’m glad you did.”

Unsure what to even say, you just kept on smiling. “Thank-

“What did I say?” Despite his normally cold visage, the tilt in his voice was enough to signify to you that he was teasing you.

You inclined your head toward him, “Fine. I’m… really happy, that we’re friends.”

He looked at you fully, not saying anything and making you question if you overstepped, before Sakusa stated, “Kiyoomi.”

“What?”

“Call me Kiyoomi.”

“Oh.” You smiled, “(F/N) is fine too.”

The rest of the train ride had such a lighthearted atmosphere. The only other person you could sit in comfortable silence with was Akaashi, but even then he was so silently sassy that it was nothing like Sakusa’s energy. And yet, at that moment, you felt so comfortable in his presence.

Sakusa did as he said he would, walking you all the way to the school-gates before finally bidding you farewell.

“See you around, (F/N).”

You reiterated it back to him, only walking off when he disappeared from sight. The smile on your face stayed etched there all the way back to your dorm room - where Yukie and Kaori were eagerly waiting on your lower bunk-bed, your roommate nowhere to be seen.

“Details, (F/N)-chan!” Yukie yelled out immediately, an enthused Kaori not too far behind her. 

And you did just so for the entirety of the hangout - from the billiards club, the manager’s desire to be closer to other teams, to your conversation with Sakusa on the train. They nodded along as you explained, having brought snacks with them as well, it was clear they were waiting for a while. How they got in your dorm room - that was a question for another time.

They chuckled at you for thinking Komori was the reason and nodded in understanding about the female manager. It was only at the end when they really questioned you and Sakusa.

“So… not dating, huh?” Yukie asked with a raised brow.

“Not yet.” Kaori answered.

“Damn, that means I owe Bokuto Yakisoba bread.”

You chuckled at the girls’ words, but felt that you could no longer honestly deny their teasing. The two of you were nothing more than friends, but there was no denying that you wouldn’t mind the possibility of being more than that…

Fuck it, you liked him.

No longer doing mental somersaults in your brain, it was surprisingly easy to accept the fact that you had a crush on the Itachiyama ace.

And your relationship only seemed to grow as the school year went on. During the next practice match, you formally introduced Yukie and Kaori to the other manager. The four of you were quick buds and she was invited to your dorm room on occasion. Other members of the team greeted you warmly, Sakusa even calling you by your first name, confirming that your last conversation was not just a fever dream you had one day.

Your heart only squeezed in on itself more when you felt your lingering looks become mutual. Sakusa had always garnered your attention during practice matches. But between plays and matches, you would just be looking at him when suddenly, he would be looking at you too. 

No matter how many times it happened, Yukie always made sure to tease you when she caught you.

You would text him memes and would receive a dry lol in return. There were times that he would spin the conversation and ask if you had eaten yet. 

Was he really trying to mother hen the Fukurōdani manager? You thought with a smile.

Your small texts and conversations were tantamount to much more when it came to Sakusa. His actions meant much more than it did to the average person. He did not waste movements, nor did he waste his own time. These were more than just dry texts - Sakusa could easily not reply at all. 

You learned that he disliked oranges due to its messiness. He actually liked the colors of his school tracksuit, even though they were bright against the soft hues of the Tokyo landscape. He was not a fan of the interviews, but knew it was a small sacrifice if he wanted to go pro. He loved his team and wanted to go far with them.

These little details made you like him even more - there was so much more to him than just volleyball.

When you finally voiced your feelings to Yukie, she gave you a soft smile and a pat on the shoulder. “I have eyes, you know. We all do, actually. But I’m glad you finally caught up.”

You laughed at her words then - maybe you really were a late bloomer when it came to your feelings?

Your frequent texts became frequent calls. Those became frequent late night video chat’s and soon enough, even your coach was teasing you over your close relationship. 

“The next practice match with your boyfriend’s team is scheduled for next Friday.” They stated with a straight face to the entire volleyball team, making the third-years chuckle and Bokuto even nudge you with his elbow.

“Not saying you’re just friends anymore?” Yukie asked with a smirk one time.

You shrugged, to which Akaashi sighed before ruffling your hair.

And so, when the managers were hanging out in their hotel room at the next Interhigh National Tournament in the fall, neither Yukie nor Kaori nor the Itachiyama manager, who was chilling with you guys, batted an eyelash when Sakusa texted you to hang-out that night.

You texted back, trying to convey a teasing tone over the words. “Wouldn’t it be weird if I was having dinner with the rival team of mine at Nationals?”

His response was immediate:

Not team; just me.

You blush only increased and Yukie teased you further, “Woah, what could he possibly be sending you for you to get that red?”

“I’m willing to bet Yakisoba bread that they’ll be official before the next nationals.” The other manager stated, outstretching a hand toward Kaori and Yukie.

“Whaaaat?” The former drew out, “I’m thinking by tonight.”

“Shut up.” You stated as you blushed, putting on your outdoor shoes and a jacket.

Going down to the lobby, you scanned the room to see Akaashi and Bokuto at one of the tables. The two had such a… trusting relationship, you learned. Yes, Akaashi played the suffering card almost every day. But the setter loved to watch Bokuto play so passionately, you could see it in his eyes every time they were on the court.

Whatever was going on there, you supported it.

Turning away, you made your way over to the door where Sakusa was waiting. He looked so out of place, as per usual, hands in pockets and looking as if he wanted to be anywhere but there.

As you approached, Sakusa nodded to you in greeting and - to your eternal surprise - took your hand in his own before guiding you out the door. He had on winter gloves, so none of your germs would be touching his skin, but the action itself was so surprising. Yes, you talked and smiled and pined after him - but premarital holding hands?? Were you both ready for this??

He led the way over to a small cafe, walking in mutual silence and only releasing your hand when the host seated you across from each other. You eagerly soaked up the menu, eyes scanning the sweets while he deliberated over something.

Sakusa had yet to say anything to you, not grabbing at the menu either, which worried you in a way. What was it that was on his mind?

“Something wrong, Yoomi?” The nickname slipped off the tongue easily, having used it in your last night talks on the phone with one another.

“I want you to know my intentions in our relationship.”

You swallowed at his words, sure that he heard your nervous tick as well.

“I want to get to know you.”

The teasing smile was quick on your face, “Me too. I mean, that’s what we’ve been doing all along?”

“No.” He cut in instantly, tugging the face mask he had on down and off. “As in get to know you with the intention of being more than friends.”

“Oh?”

“You confuse me endlessly.” He admitted, “Your initial kindness made no logical sense - why extend it to your rival that you barely know? Why humanize me, get to know my team after all this time?”

“Because I wanted to be kind, even way back then.” You thought aloud your reasoning.

“I know you now. And what I see… That’s what I like about you.”

“Wait. You like me?”

Your humility was cute and such a rare trait in your shared interest; the small question made Sakusa smile inwardly. 

“Yes. And you like me too.” He responded with a smirk, to which you could not even deny.

“Well, yeah!” You laughed as you affirmed his statement.

He tilted his head at your outburst - god help him you were so cute. His smirk morphed into one of an endearing expression, before he took a breath and calmed himself.

“I do have to be honest with you.” He started, “I want to get closer to you, more than before. But my priorities right now are volleyball.”

Your bright smile fell to a neutral grin, not really from his words, since you truly did understand his situation. He was in his third-year, college scouts and grades were on the line at every turn for him. Even tomorrow, at the Fall National tournament, his performance could very well carve out the future he was working so hard for this whole time.

Your silence must have been a telling sign for Sakusa, since he started to pour out questions in a way that usually occurred when he fixated on something.

“Stop, you don’t need to explain it to me. I understand fully. There’s too much on the line right now to get distracted.” Your smile was back on your face as you reached over to grab at his hand this time, “But I want to get to know you too.”

“Good.”

The hand under your’s squeezed back lightly, before upturning the positions so yours rested in his larger one. It was a silent moment, sharing eye contact that felt so intimate, and yet similar to the one you shared at the last tournament. His smile, rarer than the times Bokuto fell silent, was small and for you alone at this moment. 

What he was asking for was not an outright relationship - nothing about this was normal, but you wouldn’t have preferred it to be.

--------

(continue; BUT SPOILER WARNING TO CHAPTER 392!! :O)

You sat in the stands on the Black Jackals side, cheering on the team of your boyfriend of three years. Adorned on your shoulders was Sakusa’s sports jacket, his last name shown proudly on your back. Next to you, Akaashi and Yukie were loudly cheering for the team’s victory.

Seeing both Bokuto and Sakusa on the same team was no longer a strange sight. And, instead,  always elicited a pang of pride surging through you every time you watched their games.

The two of you never confirmed your relationship throughout the rest of high school. And while this made many of your then teammates groan at your ambiguous relationship, especially since many kept betting Yakisoba bread to no avail, you would not have it any other way.

After a few months from your conversation in the cafe, Sakusa would kiss your cheek in goodbye, no matter who was around you. When walking around Shibuya, with either yours or his or even with Nekoma’s team around, he would hover shoulder-to-shoulder with you.

And when Itachiyama, the favored team to win Nationals as a whole, lost to Inubushi East High - you held him in your embrace the entire night in the comfort of his hotel room. He did not cry then, but his disposition was enough for you to know that he was not okay.

And when Fukurōdani made it all the way to the finals of the National Spring Interhigh, only to get eliminated, Sakusa held you close despite your loud crying the next day.

You knew how much Sakusa cherished you, that was all that mattered. And so when he kissed you for the first time, even without a label to your relationship, none of that mattered. Your feelings to each other only grew with time and what happened in the private recess of your relationship was for you two alone.

Watching the pro team win the game 3:2, with your boyfriend getting the first service ace of the game, you almost cried in joy at how far he progressed in achieving his dream. This was a far cry from his first pro-game, but seeing him on the court, surrounded by your Fukurōdani friends, brought so much nostalgic feelings to your heart.

Even as the rest of the audience cleared the stadium, you and the two others lingered. Bokuto made sure to wave at Akaashi, his significant other since the day you lost at the Spring Nationals.

You waited together until you received a text from Sakusa, then headed down toward the entrance of the changing rooms as a group. Some of the members of the Black Jackals were already waiting for you three by the time you made it through the crowd and down.

Hinata greeted you excitedly while Bokuto ran, with not a hint of hesitation, toward Akaashi. Lifting the previous setter off the ground, he placed a light butterfly kiss on his nose, careful not to hit his glasses.

“Kōtarō, please.” Akaashi attempted to chastise the volleyball player for ignoring the rest of the group and stop him from getting any deeper in his public display of affection, but the smile on his face took off the weight of his words.

“I love you.” Bokuto said, forehead to forehead with your close friend to this day, before receiving the words in kind from the previous setter.

You smiled warmly at the two - to think that they were dancing around their feelings also in high school. Having teased them a lot before, it only warmed your heart to know that they found their eternal happiness in each other.

Yukie was also smiling behind you, before Bokuto took the both of you in his arms for a long awaited hug. Your high school best-friend offered him a Yakisoba bread after, it was not a silent tradition after all the lost bets she participated in. Bokuto took it with a smile, putting the bread in his pack before encasing Akaashi’s hand in his own.

Atsumu was next to leave the changing room, shamelessly flirting with both you and Yukie the moment he laid eyes on you.

You laughed at the setter’s attempts, “Come on blondie, give it up.”

“You know, I think you’d make a great manager for our team.” He ended it with a wink.

“(F/N)-chan used to be my manager before!” Bokuto cut in, sticking his tongue out in jest at the end.

You felt strong arms wrap around your midsection from behind, Sakusa having quietly exited the changing room, before feeling his lips against the side of your head. “Sorry for making you wait. I had to wait for them to sanitize the showers again after Atsumu used it before me.”

The setter sputtered in reaction, after being implied as dirty, but was honestly used to it by now. 

Only when Bokuto inclined his head toward the exits did Sakusa let go of you. But only for a second, grabbing your hand in his own as you headed out. The group had agreed earlier about going somewhere for the victory dinner - probably the usually ramen place you haunted in Shibuya.

Facing you fully now -  Sakusa held your cheeks in his hands, the coarse skin affected by the endless hours of enduring volleyball. You leaned into the motion as he lowered his height closer to you. Familiar with each other’s nuances by now, you angled your head to side as your hands comfortably wrapped around his neck. Nudging your nose slightly with his own, he rested his forehead against yours before the velvet skin of his lips matched your own.

You felt one of his hands move to curve around your waist, bringing you closer to him as he deepened your act of affection. Greedy to just feel more of him, you leaned into Sakusa again, lips meeting twice, three times, before you pulled away.

His loud groan was palpable to the now silent hallway.

Sakusa was only ever so affectionate when you were in private. And so for him to be this forward while the possibility of getting caught still hung in the balance was a rare thing - not that you were complaining.

“Come on, we should go catch-up with the rest of your team.” You said almost breathlessly, still sharing the same breath in your close embrace.

You felt one of his hands travel behind your head slowly, grazing the back of your neck softly as he went. You leaned into him at the feeling, sensitive to the touch. The smirk on his face was obvious, the jackass - teasing you in public of all places. 

“Do we have to?”

Was he trying to tempt you to just go straight home to your shared apartment?

Not one to be easily swayed, you gave him a small peck on the lips before backing out of his embrace entirely. 

His hands dropped down to yours as you went, “Yes, we have to.”

Pulling you back to him, and chastely kissing your forehead this time, Sakusa replied. “Okay, but only for you.”

Your smile only widened then, at his affection words meant only for you. 

Your relationship was never easy, busy with your respective college degrees, and the attention that came with being a professional athlete gaining world-renown. Like every other couple, you fought, and cried, and loved each other so much in your own little ways.

The two of you had a quiet sort of romance. You were not the sort who would flaunt your relationship in public, nor would you so eagerily utter the words I love you as other couples, but you knew that what you had was real.

What started as a chance encounter became the best partner you could ever ask for.

------------------------

Author’s notes:

The only reason I’m thinking Fukurōdani has dorms is just an educated guess:

All the schools that have “Academy” in the name seem to be the ‘higher’ or more prestigious schools. Karasuno High, Nekoma High, Shinzen High - none of these places have dorms. But Shiratorizawa Academy; Fukurōdani Academy; Itachiyama Academy -> since Shiratorizawa is confirmed to have dorms i figured ayyy let's roll with it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ A loooot of my assumptions are going to be based off Shiratorizawa - like the fact that they feel they’re the best and practice with colleges instead of other hs cause they’re not good enough lmao

IT ALMOST KILLS ME that we know only TWO people on the Itachiyama team and then timeskip hits and its like ?? LOL ok ?? hype them up for so long and JUST NOW we see Sakusa play ok ok ok 

✧  Masterlist

[theartofdreaming1]

Katniss, Peeta, and Haymitch are slowly becoming a proper team! No more secrets! (for the most part)

As usual, my thoughts regarding this week’s prompts and (many) random thoughts on chapters 4-6 are below the cut.

heart

Losing that comfort of sleeping in each other’s arms after the Victory Tour must have been hard for Katniss and Peeta! Up until Katniss hurts her ankle, they probably didn’t really do much about it, just trying to make it through on their own... After she hurt her ankle and Peeta’s spending more time over at her place, I can easily imagine him staying over, at least until she’s fallen asleep, which might help a little... Since they are living only three houses apart from each other, I like to imagine that they can see each other’s bedroom windows from their bedroom (how else would Katniss know that Peeta sleeps with the windows open? I can’t really imagine that they would be able to open the windows of the train they were on - y’know, for “safety reasons” (i.e. making sure nobody can escape)); maybe they’d both light a candle and put it by their window, as a signal they are going to sleep... It’s not the same, but it helps a little 

mind

I mean, aside from the systemic rigging of the reaping system (i.e. poorer people generally having more entries, so they can have some food), I can easily imagine there being a manipulation of the “odds” when someone becomes too vocal or troublesome for the local authorities, such as someone trying to unionize a district’s workforce, for example

soul

In the districts, their impact has to be big - their win alone was a huge defiance of the Games as they used to be... sticking together and sticking up for each other ultimately led to them defeating the Capitol’s rules! In-between the Games and the Victory Tour I don’t think there was much noteworthy going on (although maybe the fact that, so far, none of the new victors’ loved ones had been hurt - Prim, Mrs. E., but also Gale and his family would be visible during the celebrations, I’m sure, same probably goes for the Mellark’s - might tell the people in the district that Snow and his cronies were aware of the attention any assassination attempt would gather and that this, in turn, might actually could become the last straw that would spark a revolution. In a way, that was proof that the people on top were at least a little afraid of what the people in the districts would do...) And then, especially during the visit of D11, with Katniss expressing her thanks and Peeta reaching out to share their winnings with the people from D11, another district than their own - it must have provided a lot of inspiration, I’m sure. 

As for the Capitolites, maybe some of them would notice for once how unhappy/riled up the people in some of the districts were... or at least stop to think about how this time, a show of love and companionship actually provided more “entertainment” and intrigue than the brutal gore and bloodshed from previous Games (also, longer lasting - there is actually much more “story” to be had from the star-crossed lovers from D12 than from any individual winner of previous Games, if you think about it... Their “love story” is still on-going, with an upcoming wedding and the promise of a family... it’s still creepy and voyeuristic as hell, though)

Chapter 4

Everything he [Haymitch] said was true about the Capitol’s expectations, my future with Peeta, even his last comment. Of course, I could do a lot worse than Peeta. That isn’t really the point, though, is it? One of the few freedoms we have in District 12 is the right to marry who we want or not marry at all. And now even that has been taken away from me. - God, this sucks so much! As Katniss rightly points out, her misery isn’t about Peeta at all - it’s about her (and also his, just pointing that out) agency being taken away! She’s being stripped even of that little sliver of agency that inhabitants of D12 usually have (choice of whom to marry, or whether to marry at all)

I wonder if President Snow will insist we have children. - Eugh, just the idea of Snow being the one to have the last word on that subject... 🤢 The invasion of privacy here... - The only person who should get to decide whether Katniss should have children or not is Katniss herself! Period!

My mind searches frantically for a way out. I can’t let President Snow condemn me to this. Even if it means taking my own life. Before that, though, I’d try to run away. - Boy, Katniss is even contemplating taking her own life, rather than to submit to the life the Capitol wants to force on her; it’s not her first choice (she’d rather run away), but it shows the desperation she’s feeling

Could I even manage to take everyone I love with me, start a new life deep in the wild? Highly unlikely but not impossible. - Later we will see that Peeta and Haymitch also belong into the category of “people Katniss loves” 😊(as well as her family, Gale, and his fam, of course)

“And Peeta’s team is probably still asleep.” “Doesn’t he need prepping?” I ask. “Not the way you do,” Effie replies. What does this mean? It means I get to spend the morning having the hair ripped off my body while Peeta sleeps in. I hadn’t thought about it much, but in the arena at least some of the boys got to keep their body hair whereas none of the girls did. - Gotta love that everlasting sexism that, even far into the future, still won’t allow women to have frickin’ body hair (y’know, like most humans do 🙄)

I can remember Peeta’s now, as I bathed him by the stream. Very blond in the sunlight, once the mud and blood had been washed away. Only his face remained completely smooth. Not one of the boys grew a beard, and many were old enough to. I wonder what they did to them. - Katniss seems to have committed every single detail about Peeta to her memory, including how his body hair looked when she cleaned him in the last Games... okay 👀😏 On a more somber note, what is it that the Capitol is doing to these poor kids?! The boys couldn’t grow beards and - I’m assuming - the girls wouldn’t get their periods while in the arena (since the Games can last for weeks, it would be a huge disadvantage if any of the girls also had to content with cramps + periods  - aside from worrying about getting murdered, I mean); it’s such a violation of one’s autonomy over one’s own body, yikes

Flavius tilts up my chin and sighs. “It’s a shame Cinna said no alterations on you.” “Yes, we could really make you something special,” says Octavia. “When she’s older,” says Venia almost grimly. “Then he’ll have to let us.” - Eeek, no thanks!😦 And frankly, it really shouldn’t be Cinna’s call to make but, y’know, Katniss’s!!! I don’t know, I get real panick-y just reading this exchange (I have never even gotten my ears pierced - my mom wouldn’t let them be pierced until I could make my own decision on that subject matter and as someone with skin issues and bad experiences with needles, I really don’t feel the need to have any unnecessary metal inserted into my body, so... I’m good)

His [Peeta’s] apology takes me by surprise. It’s true that Peeta froze me out after I confessed that my love for him during the Game was something of an act. But I don’t hold it against him. [...] “I’m sorry, too,” I say. [...] “There’s nothing for you to be sorry about. You were keeping us alive.” - That apology of Peeta’s... *chef’s kiss*; it was totally understandable that Peeta was upset and needed some time apart from Katniss after her confession, which had caught him completely by surprise, not even Katniss blames him for that... But his apology shows that he really made use of their time apart to work out his emotions and to reflect on both their situations - that’s some emotional maturity to be envious of! Plus, his apology is a good move to get their communication channel opened up again

It would be nice if he’d come to me with this earlier, before I knew that President Snow had other plans and just being friends was not an option for us anymore. But either way, I’m glad we’re speaking again. - Come on, Katniss, cut this boy some slack! He can’t read minds - how is he supposed to know about these things if you don’t tell him anything? It’s nice that you’re glad that you guys are on speaking terms again, but communication isn’t a one-way street, y’know?

I remember the tiger lily cookie and, now that Peeta is talking to me again, it’s all I can do not to recount the whole story about President Snow. But I know Haymitch wouldn’t want me to. I’d better stick to small talk. - Katniss really should have listened to her instincts here - Haymitch might have a better idea of how the Games/Capitol works, but he knows little about teamwork, which is an important factor in their specific (and unprecedented!) situation; I’m not blaming Katniss for relying on her mentor here, but this entire approach is going to crash and burn in the next chapter

It’s good to feel his fingers entwined with mine again, not for show but in actual friendship. We walk back to the train hand in hand. - Not to say that you can’t have friendships where you frequently hold hands - you totally can - but it is noteworthy that I don’t think I can recall Katniss holding hands with any of her other friends... (somehow, I can’t really picture Katniss holding hands with Gale casually like that... nor with Madge or Finnick later on) 

At the door, I remember, “I’ve got to apologize to Effie first.” “Don’t be afraid to lay it on thick,” Peeta tells me.- There is something about this exchange that speaks to me... maybe because it reads like some sort of an inside joke between them? Or because it shows that, despite being on good terms with Effie, Peeta’s totally aware of how high-maintenance/over the top Effie is... I dunno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Peeta has painted the Games. Some you wouldn’t get right away, if you hadn’t been with him in the arena yourself. Water dripping through the cracks in our cave. The dry pond bed. [...] Others any viewer would recognize. The golden horn called the Cornucopia. [...] And me. I am everywhere. [...] “What do you think?” he asks. “I hate them,” I say. I can almost smell the blood, the dirt, the unnatural breath of the mutt. - These are the pieces Peeta meant to exhibit in the Capitol, right? I wonder if he hoped that these paintings of his impressions/memories of the Games might actually connect with some Capitolites and might even move them to feel some empathy for the Tributes? Maybe he hoped that they would be more receptive for that kind of thing if he packaged it in art?

“All I do is go around trying to forget the arena and you’ve brought it back to life. How do you remember these things so exactly?” “I see them every night,” he says. [...] “Me too. Does it help? To paint them out?” “I don’t know. I think I’m a little less afraid of going to sleep at night, or I tell myself I am,” he says. “But they haven’t gone anywhere.” - I do wonder, whether and how painting out these moments could have therapeutic value for Peeta - on the one hand, the act of painting out specific intrusions/flashbacks might be helpful because he’d end up focusing on the more technical side of painting, y’know? Focussing on mixing the right shade of a certain color might help create some emotional distance from the moment itself... also, since painting usually takes some time, Peeta would actually spend a considerable amount of time facing these moments head on, rather than trying to avoid them (avoidance tends to increase the frequency of flashback/intrusions) and maybe spending so much time on them could also help him contextualize them within the broader narrative of his life, which is the basic principle behind Narrative Exposure Therapy, which is said to be pretty effective at treating PTSD... just my two cents

I can’t believe the size of District 11. “How many people do you think live here?” Peeta asks. I shake my head. In school they refer to it as a large district, that’s all. No actual figures on the population. - Perfect example of how tightly the Capitol controls the information the people in the districts have about the other districts... which is basically nothing. Let’s keep them in the dark so they are less likely to connect with each other and band together...

Cinna comes in with a pretty orange frock patterned with autumn leaves. I think how much Peeta will like the color. - Lol, Katniss bringing everything back to Peeta because she definitely hasn’t a crush on the guy, I see 😉

And then he [Peeta] hesitates before adding something that wasn’t written on the card. Maybe because he thought Effie might make him remove it. “It can in no way replace your losses, but as a token of our thanks we’d like for each of the tributes’ families from District Eleven to receive one month of our winnings every year for the duration of our lives.” - Peeta, the rebel! Talk about an act of radical kindness! I’m so proud of him. But also, I think this is another excellent example of how he and Katniss are on the same wavelength (this took me some time to find, but here you go): I silently say good-bye to Thresh and thank him for my life. I promise to remember him and, if I can, do something to help his family and Rue’s, if I win. (Ch. 23, THG)

I look at Peeta and he gives me a sad smile. I hear Haymitch’s voice. “You could do a lot worse.” At this moment, it’s impossible to imagine how I could do any better. The gift... it is perfect. So when I rise up on tiptoe to kiss him, it doesn’t seem forced at all. - Peeta: does anything that exemplifies his sense of morality; Katniss: *swoons* - but honestly, it is so beautiful how Katniss is so attracted to Peeta’s goodness and kind heart - it also tells us a lot about her (she is quite pure, as Peeta will point out later in this book) and what she values

“Wait, please.” I don’t know how to start, but once I do, the words rush from my lips as if they’ve been forming in the back of my mind for a long time. - And then Katniss launches into one of her spontaneous, heart-felt, and inspiring speeches/acts, expressing her thanks, sympathy, and a sense of kinship with people beyond the borders of her district, beyond the superficial barriers the Capitol has been trying to maintain in order to weaken the ‘common folk‘ and keep the exploitation going

The full impact of what I’ve done hits me. It was not intentional - I only meant to express my thanks - but I have elicited something dangerous. An act of dissent from the people of District 11. - Again, Katniss has done something that will solidify her as a symbol of the revolution without intending to do so and that’s the point, I think - she inspires people through her genuine displays of caring for others (which, in Panem, is already rebellious on its own)

Chapter 5

“We’re going!” says Peeta, shoving the Peacekeeper who’s pressing on me. “We get it, all right? Come on, Katniss.” His arm encircles me and guides me back into the Justice Building. - Protective Peeta! Also, I think it’s interesting to note the wording of Peeta’s arms “encircling” Katniss and then “guiding” her - his arms surround her, and he’s leading her away from harm (at least to the extent that is in his power - can’t really be safe from harm in Panem, can you?), but it doesn’t seem smothering or oppressive  to Katniss in any way -”guide” has more of a connotation of giving direction without force, imo; in contrast, when Katniss talked about her kiss with Gale she mentions she’d never imagined how those hands [...] could as easily entrap me. (Ch. 2, CF); granted, these are two very different situations - the phrasing just stood out to me

“What happened?” Effie hurries over. “We lost the feed just after Katniss’s beautiful speech, and then Haymitch said he thought he heard gun fire, and I said it was ridiculous, but who knows? There are lunatics everywhere!” - Very telling how a clueless Capitolite like Effie wouldn’t register the rebellious aspect of Katniss’s speech; by keeping the Capitolites in the depths of sweet, sweet ignorance while simultaneously harshly trying to curb any spark of rebellion by cutting off the feed, the government is actually drawing the attention of the ignorant Capitolites to the act of rebellion itself (and also letting the people in the districts know that there was something censor-worthy going on); kind of shooting themselves in the foot here

As far as I know, Haymitch has only been here once, when he was on his Victory Tour decades ago. But he must have a remarkable memory or reliable instincts, because he leads us up through a maze of twisting staricases and increasingly narrow halls. [...] Eventually we climb a ladder to a trapdoor. When Haymitch pushes it aside, we find ourselves in the dome of the Justice Building. - I wonder how Haymitch has come to know this part of the Justice Building? Has he been to District 11 more often than Katniss supposes (he is friends with Chaff, after all), did his mentor take him there for some private conversation, or was there a moment during Haymitch’s Victory Tour where he felt so overwhelmed by feelings of guilt and powerlessness that he fled to the most desolate, solitary place he could find?

“I was supposed to fix things on this tour. [...] Calm things down. But obviously, all I’ve done today is get three people killed, and now everyone in the square will be punished.” I feel so sick that I have to sit down on a couch, despite the exposed springs and stuffing. - Obviously, all of this is awful and no one - especially a traumatized, 16-year old girl - should have to suffer carrying such a burden... But also, here we see one of the downsides of Katniss taking sole responsibility for everything - she totally forgot that Peeta might feel responsible too, only that he didn’t even know what’s at stake - which leads us to-

“Then I made things worse, too. By giving the money,” says Peeta. Suddenly he strikes out at a lamp that sits precariously on a crate and knocks it across the room, where it shatters against the floor. “This has to stop. Right now. This - this - game you two play, where you tell each other secrets but keep them from me like I’m too inconsequential or stupid or weak to handle them.”"It's not like that, Peeta-" I begin. "It's exactly like that!" he yells at me. - When kind, gentle Peeta’s mad, you know shit has hit the fan 😳 But also, being passed over/kept out of the loop seems to hit pretty close to home for Peeta (while I would like to know what his home life looked like before the Games, I have to admit that at this point, I’m somewhat afraid I might not be able to handle the truth...). I just think this scene is an important moment that leads to an end of (most of) their detrimental secrecy (hello end-of-CF-Haymitch!) and establishes their little team as such (hence the drawing)

“You’re always so reliably good, Peeta,” says Haymitch. “So smart about how you present yourself before the cameras. I didn’t want to disrupt that.” “Well, you overestimated me. Because I really screwed up today.” - Remember the last time someone overestimated Peeta (Foxface and the berries)? That ended in someone’s death as well... And, Haymitch? ‘Never assume’ applies to you, too!

“Do you think I gave them [Rue’s and Thresh’s families] a bright future? Because I think they’ll be lucky if they survive the day!” Peeta sends something else flying, a statue. I’ve never seen him like this. - Considering that his rebellious act of kindness is now threatening to become a sword of Damocles, hanging over those towards which he wanted to extend his kindness - simply because he’s been kept out of the loop (again)- Peeta’s anger is quite understandable

“Look, boy-” Haymitch begins. “Don’t bother, Haymitch. I know you had to choose one of us. And I’d have wanted it to be her. But this is something different. People are dead out there. More will follow unless we’re very good.” - Peeta doesn’t really care if it’s just his life on the line, but if other people’s lives are at risk? He takes no shit (it’s admirable in one way and deeply concerning in another); also, Peeta is right - while there still is a game to play, it’s not the Games, so different circumstances and rules apply

“From now on, you’ll be fully informed,” Haymitch promises. “I better be,” says Peeta. - Peeta generally is a very cooperative fellow, but don’t ever think he can’t be forceful and stand his ground when it matters!

“Did you choose me, Haymitch?” I ask. “Yeah,” he says. “Why? You like him better,” I say. “That’s true. But remember, until they changed the rules, I could only hope to get one of you out of there alive,” he says. “I thought since he was determined to protect you, well, between the three of us, we might be able to bring you home.” “Oh,” is all I can think to say. - This is such a quiet, sweet moment and also shows that Katniss, Haymitch and Peeta have been some sort of team from the start (also, in their team effort they actually managed to get the both of them back home!)

Everything is happening too fast for me to process it. The warning, the shootings, the recognition that I may have set something of great consequence in motion. The whole thing is so improbable. And it would be one thing if I had planned to stir things up, but given the circumstances... how on earth did I cause so much trouble? - Lol, you’re giving yourself a little too much credit here, Katniss ;) Frankly, the Capitol has been the one to create this powder-keg they are sitting on in the first place - all it needed was a little spark... All these injustices, the humilitation, the pain inflicted... it’s like an elastic rubber band that’s been stretched and stretched - until it snaps

“I’m something of an expert in architectural design, you know?” “Oh yes, I’ve heard that,” says Portia before the pause gets too long. - Bless Portia’s heart, making sure they avoid that awkward silence 😂

Effie looks so distressed that I spontaneously give her a hug. “That’s awful, Effie. Maybe we shouldn’t go to the dinner at all. At least until they’ve apologized.” - Aww, Katniss doing something nice for Effie!😊

Peeta and I join hands. “Haymitch says I was wrong to yell at you. You were only operating under his instructions,” says Peeta. “And it isn’t as if I haven’t kept things from you in the past.” - Peeta sorta apologizing, even acknowledging that he also had kept secrets from Katniss? We love to see it👍 - [...] “I think I broke a few things myself after that interview.” “Just an urn,” he says. - Peetaaa... stop diminishing your own physical injuries! Good thing that Katniss won’t let him: - “And your hands. There’s no point to it anymore though, is there? Not being straight with each other?” I say. “No point,” says Peeta. - Gasp! Honest, open communication as a good basis for a successful relationship? It’s more likely than you think!

“Was that really the only time you kissed Gale?” I’m so startled I answer. “Yes.” With all that has happened today, has that question actually been preying on him? - Peeta, you sly dog! Your priorities 😂

Some crowds have the weary-cattle feel that I know District 12 usually projects at the victors’ ceremonies. But in others - particularly 8, 4, and 3 - there is genuine elation in the faces of the people at the sight of us, and under the elation, fury. - I do think that it’s interesting how D4 is one of the districts being elated to see Peeta + Katniss and displaying such fury, despite being a Career district; just goes to show that, just because their odds are better at winning the Games, doesn’t have to make them more simpatico with the Capitol’s cruelty... (Considering how Finnick knows how to perform CPR, it’s highly likely that people in D4 are also used to awful and precarious working + living situations... maybe that’s exactly why they generally are so robust and do well in the Games; and maybe they are simply not that above joining the other Careers as long as it improves their chances of survival, like Katniss or Thresh had been... worked for a while for Peeta, too)

Effie starts giving me pills to sleep, but they don’t work. [...] Peeta, who spends much of the night roaming the train, hears me screaming as I struggle to break out of the haze of drugs that merely prolong the horrible dreams. He manages to wake me and calm me down. Then he climbs into bed to hold me until I fall back to sleep. After that, I refuse the pills. But every night I let him into my bed. We manage the darkness as we did in the arena, wrapped in each other’s arms. - 😭 Also: Very telling how Capitolite Effie just throws pills at the problem (with the best of intentions, I’m sure), which is an immediate, unpersonal, and superficial solution at best, whereas Peeta holding Katniss, offering comfort, understanding, a sense of safety, and human connection is so much more personal, intimate, and effective (for both of them!)

I personally killed the girl, Glimmer, and the boy from District 1. As I try to avoid looking at his family, I learn that his name was Marvel. How did I never know that? - You know why, Katniss -  I suppose that before the Games I didn’t pay attention and afterward I didn’t want to know. - Still, not knowing his name didn’t stop you from humanizing him, Katniss, and that’s important, too

Whatever we do seems too little, too late. Back in our old quarters in the Training Center, I’m the one who suggests the public marriage proposal. Peeta agrees to do it but then disappears to his room for a long time. Haymitch tells me to leave him alone. “I thought he wanted it, anyway,” I say. “Not like this,” Haymitch says. “He wanted it to be real.” - Come on, Katniss, don’t be so callous; Peeta’s just as much of a prisoner here as you! Also, it’s all about being real or not real with these two, isn’t it?

Chapter 6

... you would think that at this moment, I would be in utter despair. Here’s what’s strange. The main thing I feel is a sense of relief. That I can give up this game. [...] That if desperate times call for desperate measures, then I am free to act as desperately as I wish. - Honestly, I think it was pretty short-sighted of Snow to let Katniss know so clearly that she didn’t succeed in her task; she did her utmost and it wasn’t enough - might as well fling caution to the wind now. All bets are off. If there had been still some small chance she could have ‘made things right’, she probably would have been trying harder to comply to his expectations. (I’m sure Snow thought the upcoming implementations of his stricter regime would be enough to keep Katniss in check, but pride comes before a fall ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

It’s essential to get back to District 12, because the main part of any plan will include my mother and sister, Gale and his family. And Peeta, If I can get him to come with us. I add Haymitch to the list. - For such a ‘loner’, Katniss sure has a lot of people that are important to her... And how ironic that Peeta, who she isn’t sure she’ll be able to convince in following her will be a much more willing participant that Gale, who Katniss is pretty much banking on joining her

“You’ll probably have to pass a new law,” I say with a giggle. “If that’s what it takes,” says the president with conspiratorial good humor. Oh the fun we two have together. - The dynamic between Snow and Katniss is so strange; despite the obvious antagonism there is definitely some vibe of interacting with each other at eye level and it’s weird (Sidenote: Is there any law in Panem preventing minors from marrying?)

“I want to taste everything in the room, “ I tell Peeta. [...] “Then you’d better pace yourself,” he says. “Okay, not more than one bite of each dish,” I say. My resolve is almost immediately broken at the first table, which has twenty or so soups - couldn’t have happened to me; I hate soup (like, thick soups I maaaybe can get behind, but clear soup/broth is just flavored water to me, no thanks - then again, I’m a picky eater)

Peeta and I make no effort to find company but are constantly sought out. We are what no one wants to miss at the party. I act delighted, but I have zero interest in these Capitol people. They are only distractions from the food. - Well isn’t that a mood for every social gathering ever (one person I enjoy talking to and lots of food I like? Perfect.)

I pick up a small roasted bird, bite into it, and my tongue floods with orange sauce. Delicious. But I make Peeta eat the remainder because I want to keep tasting things - Katniss seems to like the combination of meat and fruit, huh? (the lamb and plums, now bird and orange sauce) Personally, it’s a combination that’s on thin ice for me; there are only a few dishes with that component I actually like and it took me forever to tolerate them (I don’t know if it’s the texture or the taste, but something makes me apprehensive about it); anyway, Katniss making Peeta eat the rest is such a casual, couple-y thing to do (or at least something you do with someone you feel very comfortable with, I think)

Peeta looks at the glass again and puts it together. “You mean this will make me puke?” My prep team laughs hysterically. “Of course, so you can keep eating,” says Octavia. “I’ve been in there twice already. Everyone does it, or else how would you have any fun at a feast?” I’m speechless, staring at the pretty little glasses and all they imply. - Oh boy, I have a lot of thoughts on this part: A) I just noticed how this is the second delicate/fancy glass/drink that’s bringing about a jarring revelation: first that orange juice with the frilly straw in THG, now these tiny wine-stemmed glasses, B) “Everyone does it” + “how else would you have fun?” are the shittiest reasons I’ve ever heard at a party for doing something stupid you probably don’t want to do (I’m having flashbacks to all the times I had people trying to pressure me into drinking alcohol as a teen - it was even legal, btw - although I insisted that I didn’t like the taste (which I still don’t, to this day); it was tiresome 😑), C) “everyone does it” - the people in the Capitol must have some messed up teeth if that’s a regular occurence (sure, they probably bleach their teeth all the time, but also... they’d really need to, D) the obvious: how effed up that they just puke to stuff in more food when in the districts people literally are dying from starvation?! (and yeah, unequal distribution of resources sadly isn’t just a thing in Panem, I know... but there is something about actively purging yourself just for funsies that’s just extra, well, sick)

All I can think of is the emaciated bodies of the children on our kitchen table as my mother prescribes what the parents cannot give. More food. - God, how awful! How powerless they must feel 😟

And here in the Capitol they’re vomiting for the pleasure of filling their bellies again and again. Not from some illness of body or mind, not from spoiled food. - Ooh, I’ve never noticed before how this passage not only recognizes physical reasons for purging, but also mental reasons! Wouldn’t have necessarily expected Katniss to acknowledge eating disorders like that, tbh... She has become a lot more cognizant and sensitive when mental health issues are concerned

One day when I dropped by to give Hazelle the game, Vick was home sick with a bad cough [...] he still spent about fifteen minutes talking about how they’d opened a can of corn syrup from Parcel Day and each had a spoonful on bread and were going to maybe have more later in the week. How Hazelle had said he could have a bit in a cup of tea to soothe his cough, but he wouldln’t feel right unless the others had some, too. - Aww, Vick is such a sweetheart! Hazelle is raising her kids right!

“Peeta, they bring us here to fight to the death for their entertainment,”I say. “Really, this is nothing by comparison.” “I know. I know that. It’s just sometimes I can’t stand it anymore. To the point where... I’m not sure what I’ll do.” He pauses, then whispers, “Maybe we were wrong, Katniss.” “About what?” I ask. “About trying to subdue things in the districts,” he says. - Peeta’s rebellious nature coming through again!

“Sorry,” he says. He should be. This is no place to be voicing such thoughts. “Save it for home,” I tell him. - I know Katniss means D12, but her phrasing of “home” evokes a more domestic, couple-y connotation again 😊

I don’t want to dance with Plutarch Heavensbee. I don’t want to feel his hands, one resting against mine, one on my hip. I’m not used to being touched, except by Peeta or my family, and I rank Gamemakers somewhere below maggots in terms of creatures I want in contact with my skin. - It’s telling that, while Katniss is not big on being touched aside from her family (does that include Gale? probably? although they hadn’t even really hugged until Katniss had been reaped, so... I dunno), she’s totally fine with Peeta touching her (more than that: remember how good she felt holding his hand again in Ch.4 and how she’s feeling safe in his arms when they are sharing a bed), it says a lot about how comfortable she feels around him

Plutarch steps back and pulls out a gold watch on a chain from a vest pocket. He flips open the lid, sees the time, and frowns. “I’ll have to be going soon.” He turns the watch so I can see the face. “It starts at midnight.” - Honestly, this very subtle hint/foreshadowing of the clock setup of the Quarter Quell arena is simply brilliant! And also, midnight is going to become an important point in time as well from here on out (lightning tree, in the hanging tree song, saving Peeta and the others from the Training Center in the Capitol)

It’s another mockingjay. Exactly like the pin on my dress. Only this one disappears. He snaps the watch closed. “That’s very pretty,” I say. “Oh, it’s more than pretty. It’s one of a kind,” he says. - The disappearing mockingjay on the clock is interesting because A) Plutarch can’t really be flaunting the symbol of rebellion as Head Gamemaker, duh, but also B) the clock arena will be the place where the Mockingjay will disappear (until the rebellion will be able to use her for their cause); and that last comment by Plutarch clearly is aimed at the Mockingjay (Katniss) herself

When I open my eyes, it’s early afternoon. My head rests on Peeta’s arm. I don’t remember him coming in last night. - Okay, Katniss must feel hella safe and used to Peeta joining her in her bed, because apparently she didn’t even wake up when he did, like... I’m a fairly heavy sleeper, but I can’t imagine sleeping so deeply that I wouldn’t jerk awake if someone crawled into my bed while I was snoozing

“No nightmare,” he says. “What?” I ask. “You didn’t have any nightmares last night,” he says. He’s right. For the first time in ages I’ve slept through the night. - Telling how the first time Katniss sleeps through the night is after Snow let her know her performance wasn’t enough; she’s must have been so tense and on edge, desperately trying to calm down the districts and convince Snow, that she hadn’t been able to sleep properly, aside from the obvious sleeping issues she’d have from the PTSD (I’m often that way before an important exam - especially if it’s an oral exam; I get tense just thinking about it 😓)

“I had a dream, though,” I say, thinking back. “I was following a mockingjay though the woods. For a long time. It was Rue, really. I mean, when it sang, it had her voice.” “Where did she take you?” he says, brushing my hair off my forehead. “I don’t know. We never arrived,” I say. “But I felt happy.” - Interesting how in Katniss’s dream, the mockingjay is Rue - lending further credence to the hypothesis that maybe Rue was originally meant to be the Mockingjay (would make Plutarch’s comment of the mockingjay being “one of a kind” a bit more hypocritical/exaggerated/dramatized, which still fits with his flair for propaganda/showmanship... and ultimately, Katniss as the Mockingjay was unique, but that doesn’t mean that the rebellion couldn’t have made someone else their symbol if they needed to); also, Peeta brushing Katniss’s hair off her forehead is so sweet and intimate 😊

After I got home, we [Madge and I] started spending time together. [...] It was a little awkward at first because we didn’t know what to do. Other girls our age, I’ve heard them talking about boys, or other girls, or clothes. Madge and I aren’t gossipy and clothes bore me to tears. But after a few false starts, I realized she was dying to go into the woods, so I’ve taken her a couple of times and showed her how to shoot. She’s trying to teach me the piano, but mostly I like to listen to her play. - Honestly? I’d love to read a fanfic about Katniss and Madge figuring out their friendship (let me know if there already are some!); it’s cute how they end up including each other in their hobbies 😊 Ah, the classic “I’m/We’re not like other girls”, which often is especially prevalent during your teen years (I’d be lying if I said that I haven’t been gulty of this in my past 😅)... Katniss might actually would have benefited from talking with Madge about her boys’ troubles, though... And it’s so funny how Katniss admits that she has no interest in clothes, despite it being her supposed “talent”, while she also admits that she does admire Cinna’s work

... there’s a mob scene. The square’s packed with screaming people, their faces hidden with rags and homemade masks, throwing bricks. Building burn. Peacekeepers shoot into the crowd, killing at random. I’ve never seen anything like it - I... I have. At least on tv... In different places, at different times, but... yeah...

[novaethecosplayer]

Hawks x Reader: A Homecooked Meal

A/N: Readers gender is not mentioned, nor (to my knowledge) is there anything race related. Just a cute drabble.

—————

You glanced at the clock on your phone as you passed by it once again. Rushing over to the oven to open it up and pull out the small round cake that you created. You set the cake down on a cooling rake and turned around to stir the pasta sauce that was simmering on low heat for a while now. You take out a noodle and test it to see if you had cooked it to perfection. You had. Turning back to the cake, you grab the various colors of frosting that you planned to use and set out your spatula to spread the base frosting as well as prep your frosting pipes. Taking another glance at the kitchen to make sure you hadn’t missed something, you nod, confirming to yourself that you have everything under control. You glance at the time once more. You make a mental note that he should be home within an hour.

You spend the hour finishing up your pasta meal and frosting the cake to the best of your ability before you clean up your mess from cooking and baking and set the food up on the dinner table. You glance at the time again, feeling your heartbeat faster as you recognize that he should be home any minute now! You can’t wait to see his surprised face at all your hard work! He’s been overworking himself lately and you figured he needed a nice homemade meal and dessert to cheer him up rather than the usual takeout you two end up eating almost every night. A nice change of pace and a wonderful surprise for your feathered boyfriend.

You rush to the balcony, ready to great him as soon as he lands. Your eyes search the sky in the direction of where he usually comes from. The rush of excitement coursing through you as you continue to look to the skies! A beautiful sunset upon the horizon, but no sign of your lover.

A few minutes past and you feel your excitement begin to bubble down.

A few minutes turned into half an hour. You sit on the chair at the table that you keep on the balcony. Maybe he’s just finishing things up?

Half an hour turns into an hour. You yawn, looking up at the darkening sky and once again search for the vibrant red of your lovers wings.

An hour turns into several and you sigh, standing up and walking inside. You’ve seen enough late night shifts to know tonight has turned into one.

You look at the dining table with your cold pasta and homemade cake, disappointment heavy in your eyes. You cover the meal up and place a cover over the cake as well, deciding to wait a few more hours on the couch. You head into the living room and get comfy on the couch. Just 3 more hours and he’ll be home for sure. He never stays later than that. You turn on the tv, feeling yourself relax and slump back into the couch. Eyes glazing over as the tv plays. Your eyes drooping heavier and heavier as you begin to nod off. Soon enough you fall into a deep sleep.

Several hours later, Hawks returns home. Feather ruffled, shoulders slumped, neck hurting, and eyes dropping. He glances at the dining table as he walks into the home. His eyebrow raises as he straightens up and tilts his head. He moves closer to the table and looks under the covers. Pasta and a cake. It look good and untouched. He reads the messy lettering on the cake, “Cake Break!”, and a smile twitches onto his lips. He knows that cake break means it’s time to relax. His smile drops when he realizes that you had set this all up for him and he didn’t come home on time for you to present it to him. His eyes glance over to the hallway to the bedroom before landing on the couch.

He moves over to the couch to see you sleeping peacefully. He brushes his fingers over your cheek and takes a moment to admire you. He’s so lucky to have you. You are the most precious thing in his life. He leans down and wraps his arms around you, gently moving you over as he lays down next to you, trapping your sleeping form between him and the couch. He closes his eyes and takes in a deep breath of your scent then sighs; a sense of calm and peace washes over him. He feels you stir in his arms and hears you grumble, waking up groggily.

“Kiego…” you drawl out softly and he hums in response, nuzzling his face closer to you without opening his eyes. You laugh at him sleepily. He feels his chest tighten and explode with love for you and for these tender moments you share with him. It’s so different from what he’s used to and he welcomes it greatly.

“Sorry ‘bout the late night, my little feather” he apologizes, still feeling guilty about ruining your surprise for him by not coming home on time.

“You’re home now.” You respond and shift so you can kiss his nose. A twitch of a smile turns into a grin that finally has him opening his eyes to look at you.

“I am.” He stated as he brushed his lips against yours before fully committing and kissing you. After he pulled away from your lips, you watched as he smiled and sat up. You sat up with him and allowed him to pull you up to your feet, his wings fluttering behind him as he leads you to the dining table. You look at your hard work sadly before he pulled your attention back to him by turning you to the balcony door. “Stay here” he whispered, before going out on to the balcony. You could hear his wings flap and then a thud onto the ground. He came back into the house with a huge grin on his face and yelled out “I’m home!”.

Finally, you realize what he was doing. He’s giving you the moment you wanted hours ago. You grin and chuckle at him as you begin to walk over to him. “Welcome home, honey!” You respond as you pull him into a kiss before you lead him back over to the dining table and remove the coverings on the pasta and cake. “Ta-Da!!” You exaggerate, “I saw you were working really hard and figured you needed a special occasion.” You embarrassingly explain your motivation for this idea.

Hawks playfully gasps and places a hand over his heart scrunching up his hero suit in the process. “My love made me a home cooked meal! I love you so much!!” He exclaimed and pulled you in for a hug as you laughed at his acting skills. He gives you a few peppering kisses on your face for added effect. “How about we heat this up and dig in!” He suggested, placing another kiss on your cheek as you nodded.

“Yeah, let’s dig in” you responded, filled with joy from the way he pulled together a fun silly moment to make you feel better about his horrible timing.

As he heated up the pasta for the both of you, he made 2 realizations and 1 decision. Realization One, he needs to make sure you cook for him more often and he needs to cook for you sometime. Realization Two, you went out of your way to make him feel better when no one has ever done that before. And his decision? He’s going to marry you one day, if you’ll let him.

[thinkingaboutitalittle]

ｔｉｇｈｔｒｏｐｅ

summary: “It’s capital, this tightrope that the two of you walk between harsh discipline and sweet indulgence.” 

pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

warnings: mentions of violence, red room, implied age gap-ish, it’s a little angsty?  kinda hurt comfort but there’s plot 

a/n: hi again! I really like the concept of this one! I hope you like it too, feedback is definitely welcome 

word count: 2.2k ish 

When he’d first met you, you were the antithesis to what he’d expected. Prepped with the information that you were a recruit found in one of the last scattered branches of HYDRA’S Red Room and trained to have the strength and endurance of a skilled olympian, when you’d been introduced all wide-eyed and with a bright smile that had a smear of peanut butter at its corner, Bucky was floored. Fresh from Wakanda and losing his best friend, he didn’t think it’d work, the two of you running together. 

And at first he was right, things were rough. Technically, you were and still are his apprentice, obligated to attend general training and conditioning sessions with him as your guide. You’d had an impeccable persistence and the skill set that HYDRA engraved into your physicality was more than enough to get you through, but Bucky had the experience. You were strong and good at taking direction, but HYDRA had trained the instinct and critical thinking out of you, and the process of finding your footing with your newfound freedom was difficult. 

There were arguments over the ungodly hours that he’d chosen scheduled for sparring sessions (“Are you shitting me Barnes? You want me to wake up at five in the morning to get decked in the face?”), about whether or not certain techniques were viable in fighting situations (“Biting into someones arm while they’ve got you in a headlock isn’t reliable option doll, especially if the arm is made out of vibranium”), and when the two of you were extra frustrated, eating habits were also up for debate (“You cannot only eat pop tarts the week before a mission!” “I’ll stop eating pop tarts the day you give Sam a compliment,”).

But eventually, when the two of you’d finally realized that your distaste for each other may have stemmed for a repressed attraction towards one another, you made it work. You Learn to fight without actually aiming to hurt the other person and you manage to communicate with one another with the exclusion of screaming matches and elongated lectures. (You also learn how to sneak into each others rooms without waking up other shield officers on your shared floor in the middle of the night, but that’s something neither of you care to define)

The two of you are sparring together late this afternoon after you’d convinced him of the fact that you’re far better suited to give him your focus after you’d fully awakened and consumed a healthy portion of your daily allotment of junk food.

“I already told you your elbows are too loose, don’t give me that shit again,”

You tighten your stance against the previously acclaimed Winter Soldier, and throw another, albeit cleaner, punch. A grunt of approval from Bucky and your movements continue to present themselves with precise stability.

“Christ, Barnes you’re stricter than my babysitters at camp HYDRA,” He smirks, appreciates the value of making light of a shitty situation, and then retorts, 

“I’m prettier to look at though, huh?”

It’s capital, this tightrope that the two of you walk between harsh discipline and sweet indulgence.

You square your shoulders and dip your head in an attempt to seem more menacing, “Only in the dark, baby. I’m gonna kick your ass,”

Again he responds with a practiced snort, “Good fighters don’t reveal their strategy before they’ve done it, keep that chin up or I’m going to knock it next time you come near me,”

Somehow, amongst all the near misses and successful jabs to the stomach, a small smirk manages its way onto your face. Before you’d started to train with Bucky, fighting was a commitment you had no choice in deciding. You’d go through endless hours of getting beaten down, only to be forced back onto your feet and beaten again; bulldozed into compliance. Training with Bucky is different; dares you to test the boundaries and willingly push yourself to your limit, not because you have to but because you want to.

You solidify your strategy in your head before moving to deliver a swift kick to Bucky’s ankles. He dodges it, as expected, and plants himself on top of you, restraining your legs between his own and digging his enormous forearms into your biceps.

“I already told you, this shit won’t fly on anyone bigger than you, princess, you’re going to have to tap,” and boy, if only you’d had a body camera to record the way that his face slackens when you retaliate with, “C’mon Buck, you’re telling me it doesn’t get you off to be on top of a dame like me?”

It’s a low blow to use your unspecified status outside of the gym to your advantage, but what was it that he’d told you in your first training session? Ah yes, use whatever advantage you have to your benefit.

You were only following directions.

Quickly, you move his practically limp limbs from your body and force yourself onto his front, resting your knees atop his flesh and alloyed forearms (because goodness knows you wouldn’t be able to hold them down with your hands) and the rest of your weight on his torso. And he looks so helplessly confused in this position you can’t help yourself from speaking through a smug smile, “Never took you for a bottom, princess.”

Buckys going to crack your head like a walnut. He jerks upward to catch your head between his fists, but a sudden rush of alarms stops him in his tracks. All of the sudden, the shield compound is doused in red lights and an automated voice is eerily repeating there has been a breach in the compound, agents follow evacuation protocol. However, the warning comes late because only a few seconds after you and Bucky have detangled yourselves from each other, the doors to the training hall are bursting open with what has to be a group of wanna-be HYDRA affiliates demanding information and files about some secret mission that neither of you were a part of.

Regardless, Bucky is on his feet immediately and ushering you to stand behind his immense form, his tone gritting out a stiff, “Y/N. Behind me. Now.”. Though your developing sense of instinct is telling you that this situation is one that Bucky shouldn’t be handling alone, your feet move before your brain can catch up, eager to comply with his demands instead of challenging them.

The infiltrators are small in number but waste no time zeroing in on Bucky as soon as they realize his presence as the Winter Soldier. He pushes you into a locker, spitting out something about staying there until he handles them and direct orders, agent but you can’t help but crack the door open, fearing Bucky’s well being.

Surprising no one, Bucky can mostly handle himself against a group of middle-aged men who are scarcely trained and even more scarcely armed. However, in his struggle with one of the larger men in the group, Bucky fails to notice that one of the other Hydra members has managed to snatch a particularly large knife from his belt loop and is getting ready to dig it into his back in an attempt to save his comrade.

Emerging from the locker, you move to kick the knife out of the enemy’s hand, knocking it somewhere across the gym, and landing yourself in the middle of the brawl. In your haste, the agent swings a punch to your jaw, but you recover quickly. You knock the agent twice and before you can move to disable him further, Bucky finds his way to you and heaves the man a generous amount of yards away. 

Before either of the chance to say anything to each other, the room is rushed by Shield agents searching to apprehend the HYDRA men and to find out any information regarding the infiltration.

-

It’s a couple of hours before you get to see Bucky again.

Between all of the shield officers asking painfully specific questions and their obnoxious insistence that things like this never happen, by the time Barnes finds you sitting in the compound kitchen, legs dangling from the center island and fingers wrapped around a lukewarm cup of tea, you’ve both had enough time to sit with previous events.

You’re ambivalent, a tricky mixture of guilt and pride making a home in the form of a lump in your throat. Part of you knows what you did was the right thing; if you’d have let Bucky get hurt, the other offender would have used the advantage to gang up on him and you’d’ve had to take on the both of them instead of just one. But there’s still a lingering part of you that feels an immense sense of shame for not wholly complying.

Maybe it’s just leftover conditioning from your time with HYDRA, the remaining indents from the ideals they’d ingrained into your mentality, but disobeying direct orders, no matter how irrelevant they may have proven themselves to be, left you with a bitter taste in your mouth and frustrating tears in your eyes. Even after training with Bucky for so long and recognizing the difference between appropriate and inappropriate times to act on your own volition, you still maneuver on a fine line between overwhelming shame and practiced action.

He moves in front of you, between your legs, and when he notices your refusal to look him in the eyes, Buck slips his thumb and forefinger under your chin lifting your misty eyes to his worried gaze. There’s a rush of bile rising in your throat that you know can only be remedied by a salve of words, “Bucky I- I’m so sorry I didn’t l-listen to y-,”

“If you finish that apology, I’m going to give you another shiner, princess,”

He stills you, maneuvering the hand that’s not holding your face to shift the tea out of your hands and then to rest on your bicep. Save for a handful of your sniffles and the soft noises Bucky makes in the back of his throat when his eyes focus on a particularly darkened or swollen segment of skin, the two of you maintain a quietness as he looks you over.

And - no matter how long he’s been fighting with you by his side and no matter how many times he’s scolded himself for feeling self-pity when others, you are in pain - this part never get easier; swallowing his pride and accepting the fact that not everyone can make it out unscathed.

He moves away from you to fish an icepack from the door of the fridge, holding it in his hand for a few seconds before setting it back in its spot and pressing his now cool metal palm to the side of your face. You sigh in relief, starting to come down from your thoughts, leaning into Bucky.

Finally, he speaks, “You didn’t do anything wrong,” you suck in a breath and he knows you’re preparing to refute his claim, so he cuts you off swiftly, “I know you think you fucked it up because that’s what they want you to think, but you acted on your instinct doll, you did good.”

Your breathing slows back down to its normal pace, and his thumb moves to wipe the tears off of your cheeks. It’s almost laughable how easily he gets you calm; how he’s managed to keep you from falling off of the tightrope and now  rests on it with you, an unspoken in equilibrium.  He nudges his nose to yours and smoothes a kiss to your lips, a final attempt at calming whatever stray nerves remain.

When he pulls away, you can’t help but chuckle. “What is it, sweetheart?”

Recovering with a weak smile you respond, “I get knocked twice for your ass and all I get is a little kiss?”

His smirk is cheeky as he presses another to your lips, this time deeper and more intentional, “You’re telling me this isn’t enough to get you off, princess?”

[vyxereads]

All Zodiac signs: What You Need to Hear Right Now

You can check your sun, moon, rising, or any other signs you may have in your chart for messages.

Aries: King of Pentacles. He represents material wealth, financial abundance, and worldly success. Since this card is upright, this suggests that you are currently good at self-discipline, and are able to accurately identify opportunities for growth and success. If you are looking for a sign, this is a good time to turn your dreams/ideas into a reality. Do something practical, instead of envisioning what your future would look like if it turned out the way you imagined. If you have already been working on something, this serves as a reminder for you to continue (if you have stopped or taken a break to do something else). Continue down the path and finish what you have started. However, avoid taking new risks and trying out new way of doing things.

Also, this may resonate for some of you only, but a Taurus might play an extremely significant role in your life now. Take for example, if you are currently running or starting a business, if your business partner has Taurus placements in their chart, they could potential bring you a lot of abundance and of course, success.

Taurus: The Lovers. This card radiates a beautiful energy - it signifies that you will spend quality time with people you care about soon, and have meaningful conversations with them that will make your soul feel whole again. There is trust, vulnerability, and you will be able to feel like yourself without feeling the urge to pretend to be someone you are not. There could also be some sort of a dilemma you are currently facing, and Spirit is urging you to make the decision that allows you to be the best version of yourself, no matter how tough it may be.

Also, even though this is not a love reading, some of you may be meeting someone new soon, and they will be everything you ever wanted/needed. This can be romantic or platonic. For platonic relationships, this can mean you will soon meet your soul family, or members of your soul family.

Gemini: The Devil and Knight of Swords. Both cards came out really fast, and so this message may be extremely important for you now. Something or someone may be tempting/goading you to make the wrong choices. Or perhaps you are the one with negative and self-deprecating thoughts which is affecting your current energy and thus actions now. With the Knight of Swords, this is a message to let you know that things will take a turn for the better, and that you will soon be on your path to success. However, you will have to break free from whatever is holding you back, especially if you are the one doing so. Acknowledge your fears/insecurities, or be sure to clearly establish your boundaries with the person affecting your energy. 

Cancer: The Tower and The Magician. This is an interesting combination of cards. Regarding the energy of these cards, The Tower does not have a negative connotation to it, but rather a good one. In this case, it symbolizes a sudden change or awakening, which would then lead to inspired action and manifestation, as The Magician card suggests. Something is shifting - but I am picking up that it mainly has to do with your mindset and beliefs. If you are feeling conflicted, Spirit is telling you to trust and listen to your heart. No one else knows you best than yourself. What do you truly wish for/want?

Leo: The Hermit reversed. This signifies that it is a good time to withdrawal and isolate yourself for a while, for it seems like you are in need of “me time” to recharge as well as preserve your energy. Something is making you more exhausted than usual, and it is good to take the time to rest and recuperate. If you are finding your work/studies bothersome and meaningless, dive deep into your heart and ask yourself, why and for whom are you putting in all the hard work for? 

Virgo: King of Swords reversed and for the outcome, Seven of Pentacles reversed. I can see that you are currently struggling to make a decision, or are unable to do so. There is a blockage of some sort here, and there is something you need to see through before you are able to make this decision. When it comes to doing so, however, you are also either using too much logic or not enough logic. There is also a lack of decisiveness when it comes to something/direction you wanna go, which probably has to do with what is stopping/blocking your progress or ability to move forward. The advise is to first tend to the things you have to do before focusing on this decision making. In the end, the Seven of Pentacles reversed indicates that the situation may not be as dire/important as you feel it is, and in the end the best decision you can currently make is probably not something for the long-run. There is thus no need for you to stress over it too much, for there will be another chance for you to make a better decision.

Libra: Queen of Cups reversed. This is an important message that serves as a reminder for you to focus on yourself, your inner feelings, and channel your energy into self-care and self-love rather than to care for other people. You may have been too focused and immersed in meeting other people’s needs and ensuring their well-being of late that you have little or no time for yourself. Note that it is alright to be a little selfish at times, and be sure to set clear boundaries with the people around you. This is also a good time to take note of how you are currently feeling, and journaling may be extremely helpful for helping your direct your emotions appropriately as well as to identify them.

Scorpio: Two of Cups reversed. Similar to the message that Libras got, you are called upon to start loving yourself for who you are, flaws and all. Some of you may have been struggling with certain issues regarding how you look/how much you weigh etc and may have even resorted to extreme means to change that part of yourself. This message serves as reminder that you are beautiful just the way you are, and perhaps it is time for you to learn to love yourself, and be patient with yourself. Take for example, if you wish to lose weight as well as to be fitter than you currently are, be sure to take good care of your body to lose weight appropriately. Do not skip meals or resort to pills etc. Crafting a workout routine and meal prepping would be a good start. For others of you, if you are currently facing some problems with your relationships/or experience blockages in your love life, Spirit is wanting you to take the first step to love yourself. When you change your energy and your vibration, it makes it easier for the right people to enter your life.

Sagittarius: Four of Wands reversed. This indicates that you may have recently achieved a personal goal, albeit not the final one. The card also means that you have achieved a level of inner harmony and stability, and have successfully found balance in your life. For some of you, this card may also hint at a sudden change, which is actually an important transition in disguise. It may be uncomfortable and a little unsettling, but remember: You are not who you once were; be sure to use your newfound strengths and make the decision you think is best suited for you.

Capricorn: The Emperor. This is confirmation that you are now in power, and have the authority and earned the respect you deserve. It also signifies that whatever challenges that come your way will not faze you, for you are more than capable to tackle them head on. However, with great power comes great responsibility, and since you have gained valuable wisdom and life experience, do remember to offer guidance, advice, and direction to people around you who need it the most. Now is a good time to act and make a positive impact on other people’s lives.

Aquarius: Ten of Swords reversed and Six of Wands reversed. The Ten of Swords reversed shows that there is inevitable change coming your way soon, and is a reminder not to avoid it, for the longer you put off facing it the longer it continues to drag on. It may be tough, but the advice is to face it head on. For some of you, it may indicate still holding onto a past situation that may have been so painful you bury it deep down and try to forget about it. Spirit is wanting you to know that it is time for healing, and to let go of things that no longer serve you. There is a hopeful energy to the card as well, for its reversal can indicate a release from any negative emotions you may have had, and thus the ability to move forward. The Six of Wands card pulled after for further clarification hints at  some sort of a private achievement, or gaining the personal definition of success after you successfully move away from the Ten of Swords situation. However it also cautions that while you have reached a significant personal milestone, it is important to keep yourself in check; do not act out of self-importance or arrogance, which may be the result of such achievements. 

Pisces: Three of wands. This card wants you to know that you can expect progress/success coming your way, if you have recently worked very hard and put in a lot of effort in something. It radiates a positive and hopeful energy, and you can expect some good news/results soon. It also urges you to notice and grasp those opportunities that may come your way soon, and use your foresight to guide your decision-making process. Know that not all will be smooth-sailing, but as long as you stay committed to your path and are willing to step out of your comfort zone, you will be able to achieve your goals.

I was called to do this reading out of the blue, and it is a timeless reading :) Do let me know what resonated and I hope it helped you in some way!

[angelhalo]

Smut Alphabet - Barbatos

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Already has the towels and blankets on standby to clean and wrap you up. If you’re especially needy, he’ll on the rare occasion spoon you (you’re the little spoon ofc, doesn’t matter if you’re physically bigger) with lots of words of affirmation and whispering sweet nothings in your ear. But usually, he’s quiet. Can’t help but offer a compliment about something you did or how you look; it’s part of his etiquette.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite body part of his is his hands; they get a lot done, not just for his butler duties, but during his alone time with you. Absolutely weak for his partner’s back - he loves the way it arches - he finds its unique shape beautiful.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

This man does not like making messes, but this is the exception. He doesn’t mind cumming inside you, but he prefers cumming on your body, whether it’s your face, back, stomach, etc. Facials may or may not be his favorite! 

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Maybe not so secret to MC after their first few sexcapades, but Barbatos is quite the voyeur (you can’t blame him, all that time yearning for MC as they lived with seven demon bros, only able to sneak glances at them...)

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s a fast learner (in thanks to serving prince of the Devildom) and adept at finding out what his partner likes, so despite his lack of previous partners he has no qualms pleasing them. It’s only apparent, his lack of experience, when you try to take the lead and he doesn’t know what to do when he’s not in control in the bedroom. 

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying.)

Barbatos will never admit it, but missionary. It’s so intimate and he loves being so close to his partner; he likes watching their facial expressions.  

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Can go either way. But by default, he’s a pretty serious person. He loosens up more with you as time goes on, but during giggly sex you’re doing most of the laughing.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Just like the rest of his appearance, he keeps things tidy and on a semi-regularly basis trims his hair. I don’t think manscaping is the proper term to use, he sees no problem with body hair and isn’t uncomfortable with it, he just dislikes when things get unruly.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

Not very talkative unless you’re nervous and he wants to make you feel relaxed, then he’ll be sure to whisper lots of compliments and leave soft kisses on your neck and chest. Lots of lingering touches and eye contact. The foreplay begins way before you’re in the bedroom, whether it’s a cliché candlelit dinner or back massage or drawing you a bath filled with rose petals, he will treat you. He is a secret romantic. 

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon) 

This man has so much self control he rarely feels the need to actually relieve himself in private. Granted, it was a lot easier before he met you. He will not jack off to you until you’ve been in a committed relationship for awhile, because otherwise he’d think he’s being vulgar. The few times he actually does get off though he prolongs the act, edging himself until he tires himself out, either by cumming or becoming disinterested (and soft), and falling asleep. Despite his personality, he never feels guilty about masturbating. 

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks) 

Bondage/shibari - he loves tying his partner up, but when they’re hanging midair that’s his favorite 

Voyeurism - bonus points if MC is into exhibitionism and encourages him to watch 

Breathplay - his hands around your neck and he’s still wearing his white gloves, try choking him see what happens <3 

Sadism and Discipline, for the following his partner is on the receiving end - degradation, impact play (esp flogging w/whips and spanking w/ paddles or his hands), gagging, begging 

Breeding (or simulating it through roleplay) - this is the riskiest one and one he’s hesitant to bring it up, if it’s not your thing it’s not an issue but if it is well you’re lucky to say the least 

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do) 

One of the many unused rooms in Diavolo’s palace, or his bedroom. He’s not so adventurous about the where so much as the how 

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) 

MC teasing him throughout the day with playful texts and sending suggestive pics, MC purposely acting bratty and insisting they be punished, MC flirting with him in the open esp around the brothers (but NOT around Diavolo). Sit on his lap and rub yourself against his thigh and beg a little, he'll pay attention to you eventually 

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) 

Basically anything with bodily fluids, with the exception of blood. And public sex is a no, he wouldn’t risk being caught. Would be turned off if MC suggested a threesome, but could be persuaded depending on with who. 

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) 

He likes both, but prefers giving. THE best service top when giving oral, ask him anything he’ll do it. Knows he’s rough when receiving so doesn’t ask for it much, but if you like being face fucked it’s a win-win 

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) 

Barbatos has a lot of pent up stress and feelings, he’s rough. But he’s also not in a rush for his time with you to be over, and so he’ll draw it out with a slow pace if time permits, until you’re begging him to go faster. He will. He can be soft too, and when you’re both feeling more lax the sex is gentler and quieter. He still makes sure you cum. 

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.) 

Sadly, sex with Barbatos is usually in the form of a quickie. He has like no free time so get used to it. 

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) 

He’s a butler yes, but he’s also a demon. He’s willing to entertain most of MC’s fantasies/suggestions as long as there is no real risk of being caught in the act. Funny enough, riskiest thing they’ve done together was fuck while MC was on the phone with one of the demon bros, at Barbatos’ request. 

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) 

When Barbatos says he can last all night, he means it. Won’t cum until you’ve orgasmed at least once. Lasts longer in doggy style because he can’t see your face and get turned on by your expressions. If you tire easily it’s okay, he’ll hold you up and keep up the pace <3 

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?) 

Ends up acquiring lots of toys to use on his partner, experimenting is the best way to have the best sex he reasons. He’s particularly fond of using vibrators on you, and keeping them in you after you leave his room; you know those vibrators that can be controlled by remote or phone, yah you can bet he’ll randomly up the intensity. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) 

If you’ll let him, he’ll tease you till you’re crying. He knows how to make you beg, beg for more, beg for less. He’ll make fun of you for whining, but it drives him to tease you longer. King of orgasm denial and edging, be careful. 

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) 

He’s quiet by nature, but his shallow breaths are so pretty, and the unexpected grunts when you push back against him in doggy style in between him fucking you are everything. If you somehow convince him to bottom or get pegged, he’ll whimper for you and bite his lips trying to stifle his moans. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) 

This man has a forked tail please pay special attention to it (aka shove it down your throat), you’ll be rewarded! 

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) 

Just girthy and long enough to give you that nice full feeling that takes time to adjust before he can start pounding into you. Will almost always finger you beforehand to prep you for his size, since demon dicks are quite dissimilar to humans’ and are on the larger side. His size came as a welcome surprise the first time you saw it because it seemed unexpected from someone so modest 

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) 

Oh he yearns for you, your body, to touch you, but he’ll never beg for sex. In fact, it’s MC that finally brings it up and initiates it. Could honestly probably go without it, but why would he now that he has the most wonderful partner!? 

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) 

He’s used to long nights at work (aka helping Diavolo carry out another dumb prank on some poor soul, filing paperwork, or something more morbid) so he won’t immediately fall asleep even though he’s tired. He falls asleep only after you have. He likes to watch you slowly drift off, and it’s these moments he knows he’s in deep. He’s actually fallen for a human. On these nights he dreams.  

[sherlollydramoine]

Which Malek Twin is Better in Bed: An Experiment; Part Two

@theultraviolencefan

Word Count: 9500. This is a big boy. 

This is Sami’s part but there may be some bonus Rami. I did the best I could. Sorry this took so long but I had some struggles. Special shout-out to @diasimar, @xmxisxforxmaybe, @r-ahh-mi, and @breadnbutternips for your input, guidance, suggestions, and overall support. I swear I wouldn’t keep writing if it wasn’t for you wonderful ladies. <3  I love you all. 

Warnings: Protected/Unprotected Sex, Slightly dom-ish behavior, alcohol consumption referenced, some fluff, some self-indulgent random sort of Pride & Prejudice references. 

Part One ( H E R E )

You’d been in a fantastic mood since Tuesday night and the people you were closest too had definitely taken notice. Currently you didn’t possess the ability to stop laughing, singing and dancing around playfully and you could thank Rami for that. The entire experience with him had rocked your world in ways that you could never imagine. According to some of your other friends you’d been wound a little tight as of late, and the intensely amazing orgasms Rami had given you had left you a lot more relaxed. 

When the boys both texted you and asked if you wanted to meet them for brunch you had happily accepted. You joked that it had been a stroke of luck that you all wanted to enjoy the weather on the outdoor patio and there were no other patrons choosing to do the same.

Your jovial mood was more than obvious at your brunch meet up with twins that Friday because the state you were in had been a topic of conversation on and off for the last half hour. The only damper on the mood had been that Rami was acting a little out of character today. He was still your happy friend; smiling, laughing, and cracking his smart ass jokes but whenever tomorrow came up, he withdrew a little bit his smile definitely turning into a slight frown.

You were determined to not allow his odd behavior to dictate your mood at this point so you’d just continue to smile and laugh at the witty banter between the two men. It was an ongoing inside joke that the two of them should have a stand-up routine. Whenever they were together around you, you were always in stitches at their antics. The fame had not changed Rami in that way even though he is a lot more guarded now than he used to be.

“Damn bro what did you do to her?” Sami jokes, taking another bite of his sandwich. .

“Nothing out of the ordinary, other than prove that I can fuck her better than you can," Rami says wearing a proudly smug look on his face. 

“I guess I’m going to have to up my game for tomorrow then,” Sami shoots back and Rami frowns so slightly you almost missed it.

 He must have noticed you silently observing him because he reaches down grabbing a fry from his plate, popping into his mouth and shooting you a wink.You sat back and watched him chew, then swallow, before his gorgeous eyes found yours as he began inquiring about how you were feeling about tomorrow.

"So, YN, are you looking forward to your date with my brother tomorrow?" Rami asks. You felt as if the question was a little odd and for the life of you, you couldn’t figure out why the hell he’d want to know this information.

"Of course I am Ram. Just as excited as I was before our date. Why? Am I not supposed to be?" 

“I don’t know YN. You aren’t feeling any kind of apprehension at all? Nervousness?”

“Ram, I. I don’t know how I feel. Excited for sure, maybe a little nervous. It’s not an easy decision to have relations with someone and still come out of it just friends. Why? Do you want me to be nervous or something? Is this some kind of trick question?”

Uncertain as to what was happening to you internally;  the more Rami questions, the more anxious you start to feel about this whole thing. 

“Did you want me to call this whole thing off Ram? It isn’t fair to your brother though, is it? That you got to fuck me but he didn’t. I thought the whole fucking point of this thing was to figure out once and for all which one of you was better in bed?! I’m not backing away from the challenge, that if I remember correctly I was hesitant to agree to because I am terrified that this whole ‘experiment’ will irrevocably damage our long standing friendship. I can’t help but feel like I’m being interrogated or something; I’ve committed no crime.” you say a little more sharply than you actually intended. 

Your eyes try to scan his face for some read on what he could be thinking. 

“I just thought that maybe you’d be nervous is all,” he half-whispers, eyes cast downward clearly internally struggling to make sense of something. 

“I am! Jesus H Christ. Rami I was so nervous Tuesday night that I almost called the whole thing off. I love you both and I would never want to jeopardize our friendship over a fuck.”

Something you’d said must have set him off because his lips formed a hard line and he pushed away from the table with such force that the metal cafe chairs you were all seated in made a cacophonous racket against the concrete. You watch him take a deep breath and stand up, pushing his chair toward the table a little more forcefully than he may have intended. You watch in confusion as he tosses his napkin down next to his plate that holds his barely touched food before he wordlessly walks away, you assume towards the bathrooms.

"Sam did I do or say something wrong?" you ask on the verge of tears. 

“No YN, I don’t think you did. Sometimes he just-he is moody that’s all. I think maybe this new project that he’s been prepping for may be exacting a toll on him and his stress is coming out in some form of misplaced anger or something. I just call him Mr. Moody when he gets like this. Perhaps it’s an actor thing? I don’t really know,” came his response with a slight smirk. You were definitely not prepared to deal with the asshole-ish behavior this morning. Irritation begins to  settle in and you wanted to slap that famous Malek smirk right off of Sami’s face just as badly as you wanted to smack Rami in the side of his head for acting like a jerk. 

"I know, I've dealt with him before when he gets like this," you retort with a sigh. Rami is definitely more high strung and sometimes dealing with him during role prep can be emotionally exhausting for everyone around him. Everyone knows about his level of dedication and commitment to performing as authentically as possible, which meant that everyone just dealt with his affectionately dubbed ‘role prep insanity.’

Taking a few deep breaths of your own you come to the decision of ‘fuck him,’ if he wants to be an ass then you’d let him but you were going to try your best to not let him dictate your mood any further. Sami and you continue eating and making casual conversation until Rami comes back, wearing a stoic expression, the Malek poker face and he isn't very verbose. The one thing that you couldn't miss were his eyes;  red and puffy as if he'd been crying. He undoubtedly could  feel your eyes on him when you caught his gaze, he managed a small strained smile and then pulled his sunglasses from atop his head down his nose as he settled them in place on his perfect face.

For the most part the remainder of brunch passed almost amicably with the two of them, everyone deluded into believing that there hadn’t been any issue in the first place. Rami did keep his sunglasses firmly in place which carefully guarded his expressive eyes and you couldn’t help but to wonder if he was attempting to use them as a diversion, a mask, or some kind of shield. 

Conversation flowed easily enough after Rami had ordered himself a few more mimosas, which were an indulgence he’d never openly admit to . He became quite animated and excitable as he began to talk to the both of you about his latest project, the one he was leaving for on Sunday.on he did speak it was openly about the latest project that he was leaving for on Sunday. You’d never tire of watching him discuss his upcoming projects, the excitement that radiates from him is contagious making everyone else around him share that energy. You highly suspect that’s why people enjoy working with him so much; the little bean was always a ball of high energy enthusiasm, he attacks everything with every bit of skill he has. 

The happy mood that had tentatively settled over the table quickly dissipated once Sami brought up his plans for tomorrow and it pained you to watch as Rami completely shut down. He stopped talking and sat back in his chair, arms folded across his chest. He honestly reminded you of a toddler throwing a temper tantrum, like Rami did once when you were six and he was being forced to eat the three pieces of broccoli that had been served to him. The moment the waitress reappeared holding the large black envelope that contained the check Rami just wordlessly handed her his credit card.

You could feel his eyes on you as you shifted uncomfortably in your chair. You couldn't help feeling as if you'd done something wrong and you found yourself fighting back tears. In all the years that you’d know the Malek twins neither of them had ever made you feel the kind of uncomfortable that you were feeling now. Neither of them had ever been a reason for you to cry and you’d be damned if you let that happen now.

Pushing back from the table so quickly that the heavy metal chair nearly tipped over, you shot to your feet and rapidly muttered out,"I guess, ummm,  if you've got this, thank you Rami for brunch. I appreciate it very much and I’m excited for you and your project. Sami, I’ll see you tomorrow and Ram I hope you’re in a better mood on Sunday.”

With a nod of your head towards each of the boys, you turned on your heel and exited the restaurant hurriedly. Fishing your keys out of your purse and unlocking your car door you slowly release the breath that you’d been unaware you were holding. 

Why was Rami acting like that? Was he jealous? Confusion wracking your brain as you attempt to try and puzzle out Rami and his moods. The man's mood swings were legendary but you chalk all that up as one of the reasons he’s such an incredibly talented actor, but they could give you whiplash sometimes. 

Settling back at  home trying to get the confusing Rami thoughts out of your head you resort to the one thing that had always helped clear your mind. You scrubbed every inch of your house from top to bottom. After all was said and done, the house shining with absolute perfection and reeking of the oversaturated ‘tropical’  floral scents you favored in your cleaning products, you settle on your sofa after a hot shower with some shitty leftover Chinese takeout and even shittier television. 

Sami sent you a very succinct text early Saturday morning to let you know that he’d be over to pick you up around noon time promising you a quiet picnic in the park. Sami was never jealous of his brother's success or his brother's money, but sometimes you got the feeling that the two of them were constantly competing in a weird way with each other. He was well aware that his brother had wined and dined you at one of the poshest restaurants in town. Sami couldn’t afford a place like that and you both knew it, and you’d never hold him the same bar his brother had set. He knew you just as well as Rami did, and he knew that you actually favored the small, quiet type of dates. Rami had only chosen the type of date that he had for the simple fact that his rise to fame did not afford him the luxury of anonymity anymore and maintaining his privacy was becoming increasingly more difficult in the digital age of instant uploads and ‘peeping Toms’. 

FIdgeting nervously with the buttons on your light cardigan feeling the familiar sort of butterflies in your stomach feeling that you’d had prior to your date with Rami, you nearly jump out of your skin when the doorbell rang out loudly. You couldn’t help the small timid smile as you swung the door open to a beaming Sami. He looked so adorable standing there in some dark, tight fitting jeans and a t-shirt with a large blanket draped over his shoulder and an old school style picnic basket in the crook of his left elbow. 

"Ready?" he asks confidently as he reaches out to grab your hand. 

"Let's go Sami, let's go,"you tell him through your timid smile. 

You knew you wouldn’t be gone long but you let go of his hand for a few moments to lock your front door. While your neighborhood was considered quite safe and there wasn’t a lot of crime in your housing area, this was still Los Angeles and you weren’t going to take any chances. 

You turn back around, dropping the keys into your small cross body bag as you place your left hand in Sami’s right one as the two of you head off towards the small neighborhood park. 

Taking a turn about the park before scouting out the perfect place to lay the blanket out, Sami makes a joke about feeling like Caroline Bingley and Elizabeth Bennet as they casually stroll around the large drawing room at Netherfield Park. You couldn’t help but joke back about how he would actually be the perfect Charles Bingley, sitting back and observing making silly jokes. His quiet laugh brought on a small giggle of your own. 

“Very astute in your observations of me YN, but wouldn’t I be more suited to Mr. Darcy?”

“Not at all. You are much too relaxed and far more playful.You aren’t conceited enough to be a proper Caroline Bingley either, Rami would definitely be more suited to Mr. Darcy. He’s broody as hell but secretly in love with me,” you joke back, completely unaware of actual accuracy of your statement. 

Sami snorts but doesn’t say much after that, his primary focus was on setting out the blanket perfectly so that you were both in a position to either sit in the sun or in the shade that the large tree offered. 

Once he had everything positioned exactly as he wanted it to be, he gestures for you to have a seat and finding the perfect half shaded half sunny spot you attempt to gracefully sit. He sets the basket down to your left as he maneuvers his body so that you are situated between his legs. This position afforded you both views of the many people mulling about the park. Your favorites were the older couples out for an afternoon stroll, hand in hand. 

“So Charles, how are you feeling this fine afternoon?”

“Why Miss Bennett, I do believe that I am feeling fine, especially now that I get to enjoy your company. I’m pretty sure that this is considered quite inappropriate as we are unchaperoned.”

The laugh that left you was infectious as he joined you. 

“Very well my good Sir, considering that you are already planning on defiling me later I suppose that it is a good thing that we are unaccompanied on this warm day.I sure wouldn’t want any witnesses to whatever debauchery lay before us.”

You feel him shift his weight as he sits up a little straighter and whispers in your ear,  "All things considered YN, you have bewitched me body and soul."

“Oh you naughty, naughty boy. You know exactly what Mr. Darcy quotes do to me,” you scold as you playfully smack him on his arm. “You’ve always been such a charmer Sami. Actually you were always so suave and smooth.”

“Oh hell. Not this shit again. Everyone always says that but I seriously used to feel so awkward and weird. 

“No Sam, awkward and weird, that’s your brother,” you laugh out again. Sami is definitely bringing out the best in you today. The butterflies from earlier had disappeared now being replaced with a loud rumbling as your stomach makes you well aware of the fact that you haven’t eaten yet today. 

“That is the most accurate statement about Rami I’ve ever heard YN. You know the both of us so well.”

“I just can’t believe that you remembered my favorite book.”

“Why do you say that? You think I wouldn’t remember those kinds of things about one of my best friends?”

“I never know exactly what you or your brother do or don’t remember.”

“More than you might think YN. Definitely way more than you think. I remember your favorite color, movie, flower, drink, meal, you sing to yourself when you are really happy, you dance when you think no one is watching, you can fall asleep nearly anywhere as long as you have a blanket, you are always cold but you never complain about it, you bite your lip when you are concentrating, you curse like a sailor and make no apologies for it. You march to the beat of your own drum. You are a breath of fresh air sometimes and it is beautifully refreshing.”

“I bite my lip when I’m concentrating?”

“Yeah, you also furrow your brows and chew on your nails when you are attempting to puzzle something out.”

“Damn man. I didn’t think-I had no idea I had so many tells.”

“Rami and I have known you forever YN, of course we’d know these things after so long a friendship.”

You smile to yourself as your stomach rumbles again and he casually asks if you are hungry.

"Starving."

You pull your body away from his chest and turn to sit facing him on the blanket while he reaches over and pulls the basket between the two of you removing an array of plastic containers filled with food, disposable plates, disposable cutlery and a few bottles of ice cold water.

Jaw slackening at the sheer volume of food options laid before you, looking up at him you couldn’t help but ask,"Sam, did you make all of this yourself?" 

"Yeah most of it. Rami did help out a little bit but I think that was mostly because his skinny ass just wanted the extras,"he laughs out in response as he begins to plate the food.

“You’re feast madam, is ready,”he intones using a poorly mimicked, possible sort of English accent. 

Bowing your head you couldn’t help but to croon back in an equally bad accent, “Thank you kindly Sir.”

Both of you all smiles as you sit together on the blanket in the sunshine as you eat just making casual small talk, sharing jokes and sipping from the cold water bottles.The casual atmosphere of the date definitely had the both of you feeling incredibly relaxed as the sun beat down on your back. The genuine smiles being exchanged was not unnoticed by other park patrons. 

You overheard an older couple walking through the soft grass nearby comment about how the two of you reminded them of themselves about forty years ago, which set off a fit of giggles between the two of you. 

Finishing your meal, leaving the used items stacked haphazardly on one side of the blanket you settle back between Sami’s legs as he wraps his arms around your waist. People watching was one of your favorite activities and the two of you often made it a fun game when you both played together. Making up random commentary or dialogue of the park's random assortment of visitors, giggling at some of the antics of the children observing how much fun some of the families in the park were having just running amok. Some children had popsicles that were half-melted in their tiny fists. There was a smattering of young couples that had a similar idea as the two of you and were sprawled on blankets snuggling in, some openly kissing, a group of teenagers near the basketball court smoking and shoving one another, and some older couples just strolling around the park. 

This afternoon had been gorgeously sunny and warm but surprisingly not too hot. The warmth of the air, and the feeling of Sami's arms around you made your mind start wandering to Rami.You began to question why you were having the intrusive thoughts about Rami, and then your mind took a sharp turn to the left and you were stunned at how easily you admitted to yourself about how fun it would be to be in this exact situation with him. Sitting on a blanket watching the children play, talking about having a family, placing small but meaningful kisses to each other's lips. You let out a sigh and shake your head hoping to rid your mind of those thoughts. It almost started to make this moment with Sami feel wrong but you were a woman on a mission, and you weren’t going to fail. This whole thing had been your idea in the first place and you weren’t going to back down from the challenge.

Somehow, managing to clear your mind of the wayward and fantastical thoughts of Rami, your body relaxes back into Sami’s arms where you pleasantly discover that you're content to stay. Time seems to fly and before you know it you’d spent twenty minutes joking about what was happening around you. The two of you making up dialogue for some of the other couples around you. Loud laughter from the two of you had other park patrons casting curious glances at the two of you, some shaking their heads and others smiling widely. 

A few beats passed between the two of you and he cleared his throat; was he ready to go?

“Sam it’s getting a little warm out did you want to-” you hesitate struggling to articulate that you wanted to leave without sounding too eager, “do you want to stay? Or do you want to go ahead and head back to mine?

He doesn't say anything but he nods his head, releasing you from his grip  and together you get everything cleared up, depositing the trash into the appropriate bins, shaking out the blanket and folding it up. You gather up the basket resting it in the crook of your elbow much as he had little over an hour earlier. Without thinking you reach out to offer him your hand which he accepts wearing a shy smile; slowly exhaling as the familiar comforting feeling settles over you both. 

The walk back to your house had consisted of you mostly chattering away about anything and everything to distract yourself. Looking over at Sami every once in a while he just appeared to be content to listen to whatever it was that you couldn’t stop yammering on about. 

Strolling up the driveway the butterflies came back tenfold and you find yourself feeling almost dizzy with anticipation. This wasn’t unexpected since the both of you knew that all of this was the point of the whole thing. Unlocking the door and kicking your shoes off nearly in the same manner that you’d done with Rami you almost laugh out loud. This doesn’t feel  awkward like it had with Rami but rather just an anxiousness. Could you go through with this?

Observing Sami as he kicks off his shoes as you had, and setting his basket down in nearly the same place that Rami had haphazardly tossed his stuff earlier in the week you let out a weak laugh. Sami cocked a brow at you as if to question what could be so funny but he didn’t press for details as you shook your head.

For the briefest of moments things felt awkward and you swear that you could nearly cut the tension with a knife but that was swiftly put to bed as Sami takes you by the hand and guides you into the living room, stopping only once you reach the sofa. 

Neither of you exactly sure how to proceed which was hard for you as you’d never been the one to completely take charge in most sexual matters. Rami had taken the lead earlier in the week and now you feel as if you’d made some incorrect assumptions about Sami. Between both twins you’d always presumed that he’d be the one to definitely take charge in all matters sexual in nature. 

Perching yourself on the arm of the sofa while Sami stood in front of you he grasps both your arms in his and roughly pulls you back into a standing position in front of him, his hands skating up your arms until his hands come to a stop on either side of your face. With a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth moments before his lips descend on yours. There was not an ounce of hesitation in the way his soft mouth works yours, his right hand settling on the back of your neck to pull your face closer to his.

Your body moving on its own accord, becoming putty in his hands melting into him as your hips unconsciously pressing into his. His left hand slowly drifting downwards from your face; his fingers deftly working the buttons of your cardigan open sliding it off your shoulders. The faux pearl buttons quietly clacking on the hardwood; something about that small noise awoke a primal part of yourself. 

Reaching down, grasping the hem of his shirt and lifting it up working together with him until it joined your cardigan in a crumpled heap on the floor. Seizing an opportunity to stare at his bare chest and arms for the first time in ages, viewing him now in a completely different light. You’d never seen Sami as the object of your sexual attention until this moment. Your eyes drinking in the sight of him; admiring the dark patch of hair on his chest, the light smattering of hair that trailed down into the waistband of his dark jeans, his strong arms and you felt a rush of heat to your core. Both brothers were physically identical but while Rami was lean, Sami was definitely fuller and you could appreciate the difference. 

You must have been ogling his body longer than intended because he let out a breathy little laugh, “Like what you see?”

You just smirk at him and reach out for him, your lips finding his this time as your bodies begin a semi-graceful, lustful dance down the hallway towards your bedroom. Neither of you break the kiss, even his hands snake around your waist and end up on your back, fingers locating the zipper of your dress. His skilled fingers tugging the tiny piece of metal,freeing you from the confines of your dress, you let out a small moan at the sensation of the soft fabric ghosting your skin as it flutters to the floor and settles in a pool around your bare feet. 

Your hips desperately trying to come in contact with his seeking the heated friction you were craving. The evidence of his arousal currently pressed into your pelvis elicits another small moan from you. You reach down and slither your hands into his jeans and into the waistband of his underwear. 

Gently grasping his firm length in your hand, you move your hand in the restricted space, sliding your thumb over the head of his cock and smearing the little beads of precum onto him as you begin to work him. His eyes squeezed tightly shut as his forehead gently presses into yours, letting out small shaky breaths. 

Raising your chin slightly to reclaim his mouth, your hand still working him. He lets out a quiet moan against your mouth. When you withdraw your hand from his pants and begin fumbling with this belt, his hands gently come to rest on yours. Looking up to catch and hold his gaze, his eyes are half lidded, pupils blown wide and glassy with lust. 

"No, amira (princess), this is all about you. Don't worry about me."

Suddenly he lifts you into his arms and presses your back to the wall, the shock barely registering before you feel the roughness of his beard scraping along your skin as his mouth explores every inch of skin from navel to pelvis. 

Sami's mouth begins to lick and suck at your soft skin in between murmurs of how gorgeous you are. 

Your mouth opens and closes in a shocked silence as his lips graze over your center. Gasping as his beard scrapes against the sensitive flesh of your thighs, and the fingers of his right hand ghost along your panty line before roughly pulling them aside.

He ends up pushing you further along the wall as he places his shoulders under your knees,his left hand on your hip to steady the both of you as his tongue finds your clit and the fingers of his right hand find your slick center. 

"Oh fuck," you whine out your eyes nearly rolling back into your head, your head just thumping back against the wall, as your hips unconsciously buck into his face. His grip on your hip tightens and you're certain there will be bruises in the morning.

"Oh God Sami."

You press your thighs tight around his face, his beard adding to the delicious friction your body was seeking. Your hands come down in his hair, grabbing onto the chestnut strands as you start face fucking him. 

He responds by working his tongue and fingers at a much more rapid pace. Once he starts the come hither motion inside you, you nearly lose it. 

You respond with grunts, moans and desperate whiny pleas for him to not stop. Soon enough you came undone around him, screaming a nearly incoherent chorus of fucks, oh God's and his name. He doesn't stop until he's worked you through your orgasm and the trembling in your legs has subsided. 

He eases your legs off his shoulders and as you look at him you couldn't help the self satisfied smirk on your face. Your juices were coating his face from nose to chin. Sami's eyes lock with yours, a slow smirk creeping across his face as he slowly brings his hand to his mouth and sucks his fingers clean. 

Removing his fingers from his mouth, eyes still locked with yours, licking his lips he says, "You taste so good YN. So damn good."

You let out a quiet moan before a giggle escapes.

"I bet you do too Sam. Come here I wanna taste you."

"No amira, this is all about you.”

You just wrap your arms around his neck and his lips found yours in a bruising kiss. The slow dance down the rest of the hallway ended once the back of your legs had hit the edge of your bed. Both of you were so turned on that neither of you hesitated to keep going.

“Lay back on the bed,” he instructs

You do as you were told and lift your hips to rid yourself of your panties, tossing them aside while he finishes removing his clothing.

You don’t notice when he pulls the condom out of the pocket of his jeans and effortlessly slips it on. It only felt like a few seconds had passed as his body doesn’t take long before his body is hovering over yours his hands coming to grip your hips.Letting out a slow breath as he eased himself inside of you. Sami’s hips stilled for a few moments giving you a chance to get used to the feel of him and when you whined out for him to move, he did. 

His hips pounding into yours and hitting every sweet spot inside of you while you claw at his shoulders and back, wanting nothing more than to pull him deeper into you. 

“Ohhhh Rami” you whine out and for just a moment you feel Sami’s hips stutter, still for a few seconds, and then continue moving. 

Your eyes widen in shock as you realize what you’ve just done. He doesn’t say anything at all as his right hand comes up and grabs your chin tightly. His hips never falter in their pace as he looks you in the eye and says,”Wrong brother.”

You weren’t expecting that reaction from him and the slight aggressiveness of his handling of you made you clench around him. The pleasure coursing through your body was very different to the pleasure you had been given by Rami and you were unsure of how you felt. 

Suddenly you feel his hands roughly pull your hips closer to his, as he pulls you damn near into his lap, his arms now firmly holding you around your waist as he fucks up into you. Sami buries his face in the crook of your neck for a moment before he takes the sensitive flesh at the base of your throat between his teeth as he sucks a mark into the flesh that you are certain is going to be a bright reddish purple in the morning, The hair from his beard scratching at your neck in a pleasant way just before you feel his hot breath on your ear.

“I bet you my brother didn’t make you feel this good.”

Those words made you moan into his shoulder as you come completely undone around him. He continues to fuck you through your second orgasm of the afternoon but it’s clear that he isn’t done with you yet. 

Without warning he releases you and you fall back onto the mattress.

“Such a good girl, so soft and compliant. Now I’m going to make you scream. I want you on all fours.”

You scramble to your knees quickly and he wastes no time reentering you from behind. Sami places his left hand on your hip and his right hand fists on your hair. 

"Say my name,"he breathlessly demands. 

You quietly mutter out his name but he wasn't satisfied with that. His grip in your hair tightens. Sami’s hips have set a brutal pace that have your fingers scrambling for purchase on anything. Pulling on your fitted sheet so hard that you end up pulling the soft blue material right off the corner of the mattress. The blood pounding in your ears as another orgasm quickly approaches you hear Sami saying something.

" Say my name. Louder." He demands again, as his left hand comes down to circle your clit.

You couldn’t help it, you let loose and you scream out his name quite a bit louder than you had the first. He still wasn’t satisfied with your response. You can hear him barely keeping it together somehow staving off his orgasm as yours crashes around you. Legs trembling and your arms giving out making you face plant onto the soft mattress as you scream his name repeatedly. Clenching around him as you give in completely to the pleasure that has overtaken your body. 

Sami responds by tightening his grip on your hair as his body tenses and he cums with a shout of your name, Both of you gasping for air as he collapses onto your back in a sweaty heap of tangled limbs. 

Time seemed to pass too quickly after your encounter with Sami. It seems like as soon as the two of you had come back down to Earth you both got up and began the process of cleaning up. 

He left by three thirty that afternoon, which left you with way too much time on your hands to mull over the details from Tuesday and today. Could you accurately be able to figure out who had actually been better in bed? Why did everything feel so different with Rami than it had with Sami? Too many questions floating around your head and you were nervous. In less than twenty-four hours you’d have to deliver your verdict to the two of them. Did you just end up in an impossible situation? Head in your hands mostly in frustration. Both of them were stellar in bed. Why is this so hard?

Trying to drown out the thoughts running through your head you decide to distract yourself with cleaning. Starting in the bedroom, you strip the bedding and replace the soft blue colored linens with the silver gray colored ones that you’d had on the bed the night you and Rami had slept together. 

Picking up some other scattered laundry and doing some other menial chores around the house you realize that you were absolutely starving. Hours had passed since your picnic with Sami and the exertions of the afternoon were taking a toll. Deciding that there is no better time for pizza and wine, both a comfort to you, so that you could pull your thoughts together to be able to come to a decision about the boys.

 Picking up your phone and smiling at the picture on your background. It was a photo of the three of you at the Oscars with Rami the night that he’d won. He had jokingly called you his good luck charm, and even though he had brought his family, he insisted that you too were like family to him and it would mean the world if you were there too.

Placing your order with the pizza place you decided that a quick shower was in order. You couldn’t focus while you still smelled like Sami. 

Deciding to forgo any clothes for the evening, wrapping yourself in your favorite oversized fluffy robe, you head back to the living room. You picked up a pen and notepad that you’d left on the coffee table after Sami left to try and start comparing notes. So far all you’d scribbled on the page were their names. You weren’t sure how the hell you were even supposed to score this. Should you do it like the Olympics? Form, Execution, Dismount? You scribbled down orgasms placing tallies under the header. Rami two, Sami three. Was that a good thing? The sex with Rami had been so different though that you weren’t sure that it mattered. 

So focused on trying to scribble down other comparisons you almost missed the knock at your front door that was quickly followed by the ringing of the doorbell. Tossing the notepad and pen down on the table with a frustrated sigh, you got up to go answer the door. Paying for your pizza and leaving the pizza delivery kid a generous tip, you drop the box onto your coffee table next to the notepad, padding into the kitchen to grab your wine. No wine glass needed tonight, you had a lot on your mind and you needed to focus, so you just drank directly from the bottle. 

Grabbing a slice from the box and stuffing as much of the deliciousness that was the pizza into your mouth, you picked up your pen and began scribbling more notes onto the paper. Getting to the header of form. Rami’s form had been flawless at least in your eyes. The sex with him had been slow and gentle almost as if he’d been making love to you rather than the fuck that it was supposed to be. 

After finishing your first slice of pizza you frustratedly toss the notepad back on the table and reach for another slice. As soon as it was halfway to your mouth you heard a knock on the door followed by the incessant ringing of the doorbell. Glancing at the clock on the wall it was nearly eight pm and you weren’t expecting anyone. 

Swinging open the door in mild irritation giving way to amusement as Rami nearly tumbles to the floor. He manages to catch himself but ends up face planting directly into your cleavage. 

“YNNNN!” Rami shouts, dragging out the last half of your name. “And HELLO YN”s tits! Such pretty things, I wanna touch 'em again. They were so soft and squishy.”

“Rami? What are you doing here?” you ask with a brow raised. You really were curious as to how he’d ended up here. You didn’t see his car or any other car. 

“I just thought I’d come say hello. You know. You’re my best friend and also because I kind of wanted to kiss you again,” he half mumbles with his face still buried in your cleavage.

 Laughter bubbling out of you at his boldness. Rami when even partially was intoxicated could be quite bold and had no problem saying what was on his mind. You help him stand upright and pull him into the house slamming the door shut behind you; his laughter loud as he struggles to remove his shoes. As soon as he gets his shoes off he follows you deeper into the house.

“Rami what is going on?”

You gesture for him to have  a seat on the couch watching as he clumsily plops down next to you. His face is an alternating mixture of serious and forlorn. Rami doesn’t say anything for long enough that you were certain that he didn’t hear your question. Just as you are about to repeat the question he decides to respond.

“I don’t want you to forget about me. I know that it’s been several days but I don’t want my brother to win. I sometimes suspect that he’s better at everything than me. All I can do is act but my brother is better at everything else,” he rambles. 

“Ram- I couldn’t forget about you even if I wanted to. You can do so much more than you think you can. I think you’re an incredible person. How much have you had to drink tonight? I think you need to eat something.”

“I’ve had plenty enough to drink but that pizza looks sooo good. I want to eat it as badly, almost as I want to eat you. You tasted like what I imagine heaven does.”

From his position on the couch he looks so sad and small. He isn’t a big guy by any means but when he gets sad he tends to shrink into himself which gives him the appearance of being much smaller than he actually is. You almost cry when he looks up at you with tears shining in his beautifully expressive eyes, and you react the only way you know how in that moment. 

“Here, eat this,” you suggest as you hold the pizza up for him to take. He just smiles and leans forward not bothering to actually take the slice into his own large hands instead opting to just take a large bite of the end.

“Mmmmm so good. This is the best pizza ever.”

“Then take this slice, I’m going to go get you a bottle of water. Please don’t go anywhere,” you instruct as he finally grabs the pizza from your hand, taking another large bite.

Re-entering the living room from the kitchen less than a minute later, what you see nearly makes you faint. There was Rami casually munching on his pizza that he had gripped in one of his large hands, your notepad in the other. You clear your throat and he tosses the notepad back onto the coffee table looking a little sheepish.

“Snooping isn’t nice Rami.”

“He gave you three orgasms?”

“He did Rami. It doesn’t mean anything really I’m just trying to make comparisons that’s all. Wasn’t that the whole point of this experiment?”

His face changes from the sheepish one to the stoic Malek poker face that you hated. It was the ultimate unreadable expression and both twins wore it well. That face you always assumed was their attempt at neutrality and it drove you insane. Sometimes you call it the mask, and this is the same face he made the other day at brunch before he threw his little Rami temper tantrum. 

“Rami?” 

“Yes?”he responds, arching a brow at you just before he takes another bite of his pizza.  

“Why are you really here?”

He suddenly starts to choke on his food but somehow manages to recover quickly before swallowing the bite of food that he’d been chewing, his face switching from Malek poker face to amusement. 

“I’m  here because…. I want to be! Since when have we ever needed an excuse to hang out together? I’m going away tomorrow and I’m going to miss my best friend so maybe I just wanted some quality time before I have to leave.”

You don’t buy it. His behavior at brunch yesterday and the awkwardness today in conjunction with a few things he’d said are contributing to the Malek bullshit detector that is being set off in your brain. He must have read your facial expression because he just lets out an awkward laugh before nearly inhaling the rest of his food.

“Rami, I’m not complaining. I’m just curious if the timing for the visit has something to do with your brother and what happened today,” you casually mention as you reclaim your spot on the sofa next to him. Rami doesn’t say anything but silently retrieves the water bottle you were holding out to him. 

“YN why is your face all red? What is that?” he asks as he pokes at the mark that Sami had left at the base of your throat.

No response from you told Rami everything he needed to know.

“My brother did that, didn't he?”

There was no point in telling any lies. Rami would see right through it and would call you out on it immediately, so you nod your head silently to answer his question. You weren’t expecting what happened next and that was Rami letting out a growl, yes a growl, as his lithe body collided with yours knocking you back into the arm of the sofa.

“I need to give you a reminder, a refresher, about who can fuck you the best. I can’t hold this back anymore. Sami may have given you three orgasms today, but I can do it so much better. I refuse to lose to my brother. I want, no I need, to give you at least four. I’ll prove to you which Malek is the better lover,” he asserts, using a tone unlike one you’ve ever heard from him before. You knew yourself well enough to know that you wouldn’t deny him anything.

His eyes search yours for a few moments, giving you an opportunity to decline, when you brooked no denial everything seemed to happen very rapidly from there.  

His lips land on yours in an unexpected heated kiss that feels way to brief for your liking. Rami had a mouth that was made for kissing and you never wanted to stop. You whine in protest at the abrupt departure of his lips from yours but you reign in your displeasure the moment his hands fist in your hair and he roughly jerks your head to the side, allowing him better access to your neck. You gasp in shock when you feel his lips attach to the most sensitive bit of flesh on your neck, his teeth and lips working together to create the right amount of pressure needed to leave a mark. Once he was satisfied that a large enough mark would clearly be visible tomorrow he works his way upwards towards your hairline leaving a trail of smaller hickies in his wake. Rami giggles to himself, obviously proud of his handiwork as he works on leaving another trail of marks along your shoulder and collarbone. All the while he was muttering something to himself about how he refused to be outdone by his brother. 

He releases your hair from his grip, his mouth licking and sucking along every inch of exposed skin eliciting a shiver from you. You move only in an attempt to adjust your body so that you can position yourself in a way that is more open to him, not noticing when his fingers gently tug at the belt of your robe allowing the fabric to fall away from your skin. Rami’s mouth continues its downward explorative journey of your body leaving nothing but goosebumps along the way.

Your mouth opens in shock and your head lolls back on the armrest of the couch the moment his lips come in contact with one of your nipples both of them hardening under the gentle pressure of his tongue, his other hand gently kneading the flesh of your other breast. His thumb tweaking the nipple just as he lightly bit down on the nipple he had in his mouth.  Moaning out quietly at the wonderful sensations that his mouth were  evoking, swearing that you could cum just from his stimulation of your breasts. When he felt he’d paid enough attention to one breast he moved on to the other repeating the process. 

When he finally stopped lavishing all the attention on your breasts you were a panting, sweating mess. 

“God Rami. How the hell do you do this to me?”

He offers no verbal response to your question but instead spreads your legs wide and slips his fingers between your wet folds.

“I knew you’d be wet for me already.”

Rami slips his fingers through your damp folds and starts to work you, his eyes never leaving your face as he watches in amused satisfaction; content that he is making you fall apart like this. Your head thrown back onto the arm of the sofa, hips bucking on their against Rami’s hand while he coos nothing but praise for you.

“That’s it baby, that’s it. You’re so beautiful spread open like this for me. Let go, cum on my fingers baby.”

HIs gentle praise and the way his thumb was circling your clit as his fingers hit that sweet spot inside of you, you came undone way too quickly for your liking. A strangled moan leaves your lips as you clench around his fingers, while one of his hands holds you steady to prevent you from bucking yourself off the couch.

“One,”he half-shouts sounding something that could best be described as victorious. “I told you that I’m going to give you four, and that’s one.”

 Once your legs stop trembling you watch as he slithers his body down yours and his face aligns with your center. He spreads you open, and his tongue gets to work, stimulating your sensitive pink bundle with his tongue. Slow, languid flicks of his  tongue, just enough to tease but not stimulate in the one way that you want it to be. Whining in protest, bringing your hand down to his hair hoping to spur him on just a little.

He begins to hum against you while his tongue begins to work a little faster, moving in a way that has you nearing orgasm way too quickly. Why is sex with him like this?

Without warning your thighs clamp tightly shut against his head, your hips once again moving on their own as your thighs tremble and shake. 

“Oh my God. Oh my God. Raaaaami fuuuuuuuck” you scream out.

You can feel him smile against your core as his tongue continues to work you through your orgasm. Once your body has stopped convulsing you feel his hand release the grip they had on your hips and he pulls himself up to his knees. 

“Two.”

You try to sit up but his hands shove you back down onto the couch.

“No,” he protests when you try to reach up to help  him with his pants. You want to get your hands or mouth on  his beautiful cock but apparently he has other plans. Watching as he strips himself down faster than you’d ever thought it was possible for anyone to do, he strokes himself languidly for a few seconds and then maneuvers himself between your open thighs. 

Rami wastes no time at all pulling your hips up and easing himself into you. The noise that escapes you makes him react with his own noises. His hips pounding into yours though his eyes never leave yours. He is a man on a pleasure mission and you know he won’t stop until he gets you exactly where he wants you.

“You feel so good baby. So good for me,” he coos.

Your body responding to him and his praise. 

“Do you like this?”

“Oh fuuuuckkkk Rami. Yesssss don’t stop,” you shout, feeling so close to orgasm already. His hands coming down to pull your  hips upwards,changing the angle, so that his cock hits every part of you that makes you feel good. Your body shivering at the sensations.

“I can feel you getting close baby. So good, so good for me, cum for me baby,” he encourages. His brow is furrowed and both of your bodies so overheated and coated in sweat. WIth his words of encouragement you feel that something inside of you snap and you cum hard screaming his name. You haven't completely recovered from your third orgasm with Rami yet but when your eyes snap open you are met with the sight of his eyes boring into yours with an intense concentration coupled with lust.

“Three.”

He moves his hips at a slower, less frantic pace which was surprising to you but he slides his hands up your body, your legs wrapped around his waist as his hands slide into yours much as they had on Tuesday night. 

You could barely register anything as his mouth starts singing your praises

“Love everything about you. Love these hands,” he murmurs as he squeezed his fingers against yours where they were now intertwined above your head, “these beautiful lips of yours so soft and sweet,” he kisses you softly, “every inch of your body is divine, like you are a goddess sent from the heavens just for me,” he lowers his body so that it is now flush against yours, “just-everything, everything, everything.” (Thank you @diasimar)

Your breath catches in your throat at his words disbelieving that he would ever utter these words to you in any other circumstances. The only explanation is that he’s caught in a moment.

“You’re so beautiful, so beautiful,” he continues as he moves his hips against yours

Your breath catches in your throat at his words and you aren’t aware if he knows what he is saying. His hips never stopping, his eyes locked on yours until you can feel his body tense and you know his orgasm is getting close. 

“Baby cum for me,” he nearly pleads. Closing your eyes and giving into the pleasure coursing through your body. Your insides clench around him as you feel your body spasming in pleasure for the seventh time today, you cry out his name again and again until you feel him reach his release. Forcing your eyes open to watch him as he cums, his jaw tensing and his mouth in an ‘o’ shape, his eyes squeezed tightly shut.

Both of you struggle to catch your breath as he relaxes all of his weight on top of you, you release his hands and much as you had on Tuesday night you bring your hands up to his hair to run them through his damp curls. He just rests head on your shoulder and you let out a small laugh when he weakly mumbles out , “Four.”

The warm weight of him on top of you combined with your exertions from the day of sexual activities has your eyes closing and you aren’t sure exactly when you fell asleep. When you wake up in your bed in the morning you smile to yourself, rolling over and reaching out but you find the space on the mattress next to you empty. 

A part of you didn’t want to feel a bit sad or abandoned but you couldn’t stop the tears from flowing freely. Why are you so emotional when it comes to Rami? You let the tears fall for a few minutes and then try to pull yourself together. You have to deliver your findings today to the boys but you needed to get up and prepare yourself for the day. Rolling over and swinging your feet over the side of your bed, you wince in pain, as you were incredibly sore from yesterday’s vigorous activities. That’s when you notice a folded piece of paper with your name on the outside in a very familiar scrawl. Confusion racking your brain when you open the notecard and realize that you don’t know what the actual note said:  ahbik. la 'astatie alaintizar liruyatak baed zuhr hdha alyawm. (Google translated so I apologize for any inaccuracies but it’s supposed to be translated to: I love you. I can’t wait to see you this afternoon.)

TAG LIST: @xmxisxforxmaybe @free-rami @ramimedley @txmel @mrhoemazzello @r-ahh-mi @itsme690 @safinsscar @ladyr0b0t @youthtea @ramisgirl512 @hissom1933 @spacedustmazzello @sassystrawberryk @ramimalekpan @breadnbutternips @doing-all-write @itslula1991 @sasha--1996 @madamsledge @imnottiredofgettingoveryou @alottanothing @mezzomercury @theultraviolencefan @the-real-ramimalekpeen @hazeleyedbeth @w0lfglrl17 @adoremalek @rawmemalek @lunasasylum @lablanchett @diasimar @zodiyack @rami-malek-trash @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye @anotheronebitesthedick @moon-stars-soul  @petites-fantasies

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Less Of An Angel

Genre: Smut

Pairings: Michael Clifford/Reader/Ashton Irwin

Word Count: 4.2

Requested: by @cashtonasfuck for Mikemonth 

Laura, i'd like to request something for #mikemonth week 2 😬so the theme is smut right? so dom!michael, light bondage and exhibition kink? 😬maybe throw a bit of spanking in there? basically, all the dom stuff we know and love 😂(maybe mike and ash if we're going for pairings?? 😬) love ya! 💛

Trigger Warnings: explicit sexual content, light bondage, exhibitionism, voyeurism, dom/sub

A/N: I’m not great at writing dom!Mike because to me is the softest baby but I have come up with this, which I hope you like!

….

“I’m going to need you to be less of an angel tonight.” Ashton whispers to Michael. He doesn’t take his eyes off of you though and he makes damn sure you can hear every word he says. “I need you to take on a little more of my roll, can you do that for me?”

Michael’s green eyes are glittering with confusion. He’s usually lying on the bed beside you whilst Ashton decides what he wants to do to each of you. That’s not the case tonight. You’d been instructed to strip and take your place on the mattress, but Michael had been kept at the foot of the bed.

“I’m in kind of a watching mood.” Ashton clarifies, easing Michael’s shirt up over his head, leaving the younger man’s blonde hair dishevelled and fluffy. “I want to see if you two can put on a show for me.”

This request makes perfect sense to you. Ashton rarely gets to enjoy his voyeurism kink because he normally has two needy submissives to satisfy.

“So I can…” Michael asks, glancing over his shoulder at Ashton once his shirt has been thrown to the ground.

“You can do whatever you want, within the perimeters of my instructions, Angel.” The older man interrupts. “I only have a few little guidelines, though.”

Even though you’re intrigued by the conversation your boys are having, you’re beginning to grow impatient. You’ve been lying on the bed, completely naked for several minutes and you’re starting to feel a little neglected. “Are you two done?” You whine, “If someone doesn’t touch me soon I’m gonna scream.”

Ashton clicks his tongue at you. “Our little Sugar is getting all impatient, Angel.” He says softly, “What’s the punishment for comments like that?”

“Five spanks.” Michael replies instantly. He knows every punishment off by heart, as do you. Both of you have experienced them enough times to be able to recite them whenever Ashton demands it.

“Good.” Ashton hums, reaching around Michael’s waist to unfasten his jeans. “Why don’t you show me if you’re as good at giving punishments as you are at taking them?”

The younger man is still a little confused, you can tell by the way he looks between you and Ashton as though he’s awaiting an answer to an obvious, but unspoken question.

Ashton chuckles, tugging Michael’s skinny jeans down to his knees. “Take these off and sit on the edge of the bed, Angel.” He orders, his voice firm but quiet.

As Michael obeys the dark haired man’s first instruction, you make another impatient sound. Ashton’s eyes meet yours and you can tell by the fire in those hazel orbs, that five spanks are about to be the least of your concerns. “Actually.” He smirks, “will you grab the wrist restraints before you 

sit down please, Mikey?”

The notion that you’re about to get chained to the bed pulls a little moan from you. There’s not much that turns you on more than being totally at your boyfriends’ mercy.

Ashton walks along the side of the bed, running a finger lightly along your bare leg and then your arm. “You need to be on your best behaviour for Mike, okay sugar?”

You nod innocently, still shivering slightly at Ashton’s touch. “You wanna watch Mikey punish and fuck me, sir?” You ask, hoping to illicit some aroused response from your dominant. It’s a tiny version of power play but you love it.

“You’ll see.” Ashton replies, his face remaining expressionless as he looks over to see where Michael has got to. “Hurry up, angel. It’s time to see a new side of you.”

The blonde man scrambles faster in the ‘toy chest’ you keep in the closet. He holds the wrist restraints up in a small display of his trauph before padding back over to the bed. “Here you go, Ashy.” He smiles proudly, holding out the restraints to your eldest boyfriend.

Ashton shakes his head, taking a step away from the bed. “Our little sugar is all yours tonight.” He explains, “the only rules I have are; always implement the correct punishments for any misbehaviour, make sure I can see everything that’s happening at all times and don’t ask me for any guidance. Are we clear?” The eldest man looks between the two of you, awaiting a response.

Lips moving soundlessly, Michael nods, glancing over to you almost as though he’s checking that you’re okay with it too. 

“I don’t care which one of you fucks me.” You whine irritably. “As long as someone does it soon, because I feel like I’ve been waiting for hours.”

Michael’s expression relaxes a little, as though he’s pleased that you’re happy for him to fuck you. You’re not sure why he’d have had any doubts, it’s not like he hasn’t done it before. It’s most likely down to the fact that Michael’s never had complete control of you before. He’s always just followed Ashton’s instructions before tonight. 

“Make it ten spanks, Angel.” Ashton instructs, pulling your attention back to him, even though he’s intent upon ignoring you. “As always, respect the safe word and always get verbal permission before moving onto something new, okay?”

Your younger boyfriend still looks slightly bewildered but there’s definitely more excitement in his eyes now. “Can we start?” He asks, placing the restraints down on the end of the bed.

Ashton doesn’t reply immediately. He silently unfastens every button of his sexy black shirt deliberately slowly before sliding it off and dropping it to the ground. He catches you eyeing his muscular arms and barely suppresses a smirk before working on the button of his jeans. Once he’s kicked them aside, he drags the comfy chair from the corner of your room closer to the bed and sits in it. Only when he’s completely comfortable does he give Michael the nod.

You can hardly contain your excitement now that both of your boyfriends are in nothing besides their tight little boxers. Biting your bottom lip in anticipation of what's to come, you take in every inch of both men’s bodies, committing them to memory for when you’re left home alone.

The blonde man sits on the edge of the bed, eyeing you hungrily as he taps his lap. “Come on, Sugar.” He whispers, trying to match the tone that Ashton usually uses with you. “You know what to do.”

Michael’s husky tone sends shivers through your body as you push yourself up onto all fours and crawl across the bed towards him. “I’ve been pretty bad, huh?” You ask, pouting exaggeratedly, before laying across his lap. 

Despite being somewhat concerned that Michael’s submissive qualities will hinder his ability to satisfy your needs the way Ashton does, you’re more than a little excited to explore this new dynamic.

Michael caresses your ass cheeks softly, rubbing and squeezing them several times before finally asking if you’re ready to take your punishment.

The blonde’s hesitance makes you wonder if Ashton’s made the right decision to give Michael a dominant role tonight. You nod your consent, purposefully meeting Ashton’s eye across the room. “Of course, Mikey.” You reply. “Don’t hold back, though, I can take more than you think.”

It’s obvious by the way that Ashton’s eyes darken with lust, that he’s enjoying the way your acting. You don’t have much time to feel proud of yourself, before Michael delivers his first spank to your right ass cheek. The force with which it lands pulls a shocked gasp from you. 

“I don’t hear you counting.” Ashton reprimands quietly but firmly. “Be stricter, Angel.” He adds to Michael.

You hold Ashton’s gaze as you speak the first number. Knowing that the older man is going to use your reactions as a gauge for how well Michael is taking on this new role.

The blond delivers his second spank to your left cheek. It’s even harder than the first and your gasp sounds more like a moan this time. “Two.” You say plainly, determined to keep your eyes on Ashton.

It’s obvious by the way that Michael delivers the next five spanks, that he’s been paying attention to what Ashton does. He hits a different spot every time and varies the speed and strength of every slap. You’re already a gasping mess as you count out the final three smacks. Your fingers are tangled in the duvet cover and your eyes squeezed shut.

Michael gently smoothes the palm of one hand over both of our cheeks, just like Ashton usually does, undoubtedly savouring the red marks he’s left there. “You took that punishment so well, Sugar.” He says, his arousal obvious in his voice. “You ready for something else now?”

You nod, scrambling off of Michael’s lap and crawling back towards the pillows. As you make yourself comfortable again, you can hear Michael prepping the restraints and your excitement starts to bubble closer to the surface. “What’re you going to do to me, Mike?” You ask, finally settling down and meeting his gaze.

Part of you expects Michael to be hesitant, or for him to turn to Ashton for guidance. He does neither. “I’m going to tie you down so that you can’t misbehave when I play with you.” He replies, his green eyes flashing lustfully. “Do you like the sound of that?”

You smirk mischievously as you lift your arms above your head, ready for them to be chained to the headboard. “I’ll be good.” You promise, keeping your voice low and even. “I’m not sure you can handle me at my naughtiest, anyway.”

Michael hums as he holds your gaze determinedly. You’re impressed with the way he’s handling you so far, it makes you want to push him a bit further. 

“I think you’ll be surprised, sugar.” Your younger boyfriend growls after a moment of silence. “I know I can handle you just fine.”

You raise an eyebrow sceptically. “Really?” You taunt. “I thought you were just a needy little slut.” Maybe it’s a little early for you to play that card, but you can’t resist. Michael’s always loved it when Ashton calls him that and you’re eager to see if you can break down this new attitude of his.

Despite his determined expression, Michael’s cheeks turn pink at your words. “Unlike some people, I have layers.” He replies evenly, refusing to let your words rattle him. “Maybe I should fuck that smart mouth of yours before we do anything else.”

You bite your lip seductively, propping yourself up on your elbows. “Is that what you want Mike? For me to get down on my knees and swallow you whole?” You pause, enjoying Michael’s silent reaction to your proposition before the urge to tease more him overwhelms you again. “Just like you do to sir on a nightly basis?”

Michael growls lowly in the back of his throat. Apparently ‘dom Michael’ isn’t a fan of being reminded that he’s Ashton’s little play thing. That’s interesting to know and you’re determined to use it to your advantage at every given opportunity. The blonde man drops the restraints back onto the bed and perches on the edge of the mattress, turning his back on you. “Get over here, sugar.” He demands, not even bothering to turn back to look at you.

It’s impressive. Michael has obviously noticed the things you enjoy. He’s acting just the way that Ashton does when you’re being bratty. You keep your smirk firmly in place as you slide off of the bed and stand in front of him. “At your service, angel.” You quip.

There’s a split second when it seems that Michael might break character. His lips turn up as though he’s about to giggle, the way he does when Ashton has him at his mercy. As quickly as the twitch in his lips appears, it vanishes, replaced by a stern glare that could almost give Ashton a run for his money. “On your knees, sugar.”

You obey, keeping your movements calm and deliberate, not wanting to betray your enthusiasm for what’s to come. Once you're kneeling in front of Michael you meet his gaze again, silently warning him that you’re not finished being a brat. “If you want me suck you off…” You explain, as though you’re speaking to someone who has no idea what they’re doing. “You need to take off your boxers and spread your legs for me, I know you’re good at that part. I’ve seen the way Ashton takes whatever he wants from you every night, you don’t even put up a fight.”

Michael places a hand on your cheek, gently but firmly urging your face closer his. “Enough talking.” He orders, “You’re going to take off my underwear and think about how my cock will feel when it’s hitting the back of your throat. I know how much of a slut you are, Sugar. I’m not sure you can handle me though, my cock is bigger than sir’s, don’t forget.” The way that he breaks eye contact with you to offer the ghost of a smirk to Ashton tells you that he’s working out how to incorporate his bratty characteristics into this evening’s role. It’s undoubtedly a clever move and you’re tempted to glance back to see Ashton’s reaction, but Michael’s hold on your face feels too good for you to break the contact. 

Focussing on Michael’s words, you reach for the waistband of his boxers. His words have lit a fire in you that you’re all too eager to allow to burn you out. Your cold fingers brush the warm skin of his hips and he gasps as he returns his attention to you. “That’s right.” He whispers, his hips lifting automatically for you. If you weren’t so focused on the task at hand, you’d marvel at the way Michael’s submissive tendencies give his dominant character a uniqueness that you want to explore much more. 

Michael’s already half hard from the dirty talk and the promise of a blowjob. He’s always been easy to turn on and you can’t wait to taste him. You lean up to kiss him, pressing your body against him as you slip your hand between the two of you to work his dick until he’s practically aching for your mouth. 

The blonde gives into your actions easily, allowing the deep kisses and your unauthorised touching. Ashton would never have allowed this, he’s have pulled you back by your hair and demanded an apology. You kind of wish Michael would do that but he’s probably never going to be quite that kind of dominant. That’s something you can live with, though. He’s definitely not disappointing you so far tonight.

Once Michael’s cock is fully hard, he pulls back from the lustful kiss, opening his eyes to meet your gaze. “I wanna fuck that dirty mouth, sugar.” He growls hungrily.

As much as you want to suck Michael dry, you restrain yourself just long enough to whisper one last thing into his ear. “That’s right, show off for sir, He’s gonna punish you for bringing up the size of his dick. You know he hates being reminded that you’re bigger.” You ensure that Ashton can hear you, hoping that you’ll get punished alongside your other boyfriend later.

“Careful, Sugar.” Michael warns, his voice still gravelly, “It’s just about me and you right now.” 

You nod, licking your lips seductively. “Oh, I know, Angel.” you reply. “Don’t worry, I’m gonna make you sure you get some of my best work.” Ensuring that you hold his gaze as you back up and lean closer to his crotch, you revell in the way his eyes sparkle as though he can’t believe you’re acting this way for him. He’s so used to seeing you service Ashton but very rarely gets to see you on your knees between his legs.

Placing your hands on Michael’s thighs, you angle your face closer to his hard cock, still refusing to break eye contact. His expression remains lustful but his legs tremble in your grip, betraying his excitement for this rare occasion. You’re determined to make sure he remembers it for a long time, so you take your time. Your breath ghosts over his tip, making him shudder in anticipation. That’s another thing that Ashton would never do, but you enjoy that ‘dominant Michael’ is different to your ‘sir’. “Just to avoid interruptions, I give you permission to cum down my throat.”

You don’t give Michael time to hide the shocked expression that takes over his face before you close your lips around him. He gasps, gripping the bed covers as opposed to you, like Ashton would. Hoping to change that, you sink further onto his impressive length, enjoying the weight in your mouth as you begin to work your tongue. Michael whimpers, seemingly unable to control his usual aroused sounds to keep with his role for the evening.

It makes you feel a little more powerful, knowing that you can undo one of your boyfriend’s so easily. Once you begin to bob your head, Michael finally reaches out to hold the back of your head, forcing you to take even more of him into your mouth until his tip hits the back of your throat. “Fuck, Sugar…” He whines. “You feel so good!”

You hum around Michael’s dick, working your tongue in the expert rhythm that you’ve mastered over countless nights of practice with Ashton. The vibrations have Michael moaning above you. Knowing that he always enjoys a little pain with his pleasure, you dig your fingertips deeper into his thighs as you work the last couple of inches of his cock into your mouth. 

The tightness of your throat and the pressure of your fingertips denting his sensitive skin, Mihcael makes the desperate whine he usually makes when Ashton hits his spot just right. You know that means his fairly close and you’re impressed with the speed in which you’ve gotten him to this point. You’re not gonna let him cum before you give him one more smartass comment. You pull off of him, making the blonde whine like the true brat he is. “I thought you were gonna fuck my face, Mike.” You whisper, ignoring the ache in your throat. “Why would you get my hopes up like that and not deliver?”

In a split second Michael’s soft close-to-orgasm expression, turns into a firm, determined one. You don’t even have time to fully appreciate how hot he looks before he’s forcing your head back towards his achingly hard cock. You open your mouth willingly, proud of the reaction your comment has pulled your usually submissive boyfriend. He pushes you onto his length slowly, easing your throat open again before pulling you back and pushing you down harder, thoroughly enjoying your lack of a gag-reflex. You press your tongue against the underside of Michael’s dick as he continues to move your head as a quickening pace. His shuddering breaths and trembling thighs tell you that he’s close but you bring him over the edge by dragging your fingernails over his thighs, leaving long red trails on his milky white skin.

Michael spills down your throat, gasping your name and cursing before his hand slips limply from your head. He flops backwards onto the mattress as you pull off of him and turn to face Ashton. You’re pleased to see that he’s watching intently, his boxer shorts tenting as he palms himself. “Did you enjoy the show, sir?” You ask, your voice weak and croaky.

Ashton shakes his head. “You can both do better.” He replies. “Get the restraints, Angel.”

It takes a moment for Michael to gather the energy to move again. When he does, he grips the restraints and motions for you to get back onto the bed. “You know what to do, sugar.” He says, his voice still breathy. 

You’re already pretty turned on by having your throat fucked and knowing Ashton is watching you and Michael intently. Not wanting to delay your own orgasm, you obey Michael’s request as he gets to his feet.

You lie back on the bed, your head resting comfortably on the pillows as you lift your arms. Michael straps one of your wrists securely to the bedpost, checking that you’re happy with it before moving around the bed to secure your second one.

As the blonde man works on the buckles of the restraints, you glance over at ashton, moaning at the way he pulls off his underwear, his hard cock springing free. “Fuck, sir.” You whine, licking your lips and arching your back. “Want you…”

Before Ashton can respond Michael takes hold of your chin between his thumb and forefinger, gently guiding your face back towards him so that you’re forced to meet his gaze. “No, sugar.” He states firmly. “The only cock you’re getting tonight is mine, remember?”

It’s impossible to hold in the moan that escapes you, there's nothing that turns you on more than being told off by one of your boys. “You better know how to use it as well as sir does.” You reply, holding gaze stubbornly.

“You know I do.” Michael hums, letting go of your chin and running his finger down the side of your neck and over your chest, before swirling it over one of your nipples until it’s stiff enough for him to grip firmly. You gasp loudly, equally as surprised and aroused by the unexpected roughness he handles you with. 

“Fuck!” You moan, arching your back and instinctively spreading your knees. “Show me, Mike, please…”

Your slight begging brings a proud smile to Michael’s face that he apparently couldn’t suppress. It doesn't matter that it takes away from his dominant edge, you just want him to uck you as hard as he can, you’ve waited long enough damn it.

With one quick glance to Ashton, a silent request for permission which is granted with an enthusiastic nod, Michael crawls onto the bed, spreading your legs as wide as possible. He runs his fingers over the inside of your thighs, ensuring to stop just short of the pace where you're craving his touch the most.

“Please, angel.” You whine again, abandoning all of your previous resolve to hide how desperately you want Michael to fuck you.”

The blonde man positions himself over you, lining up just right. “Look at me, sugar.” He demands, “I wanna see your face when I fuck you.”

So maybe Michael does have what it takes to dominate you the way you enjoy the most. You moan needily as you meet his gaze, loving the concentration on his face as he slowly pushes into you. He feels even bigger than you remember, forcing every other thought from your mind as you focus on the way he fills you up. You close your eyes, the intensity of Michael’s gaze proving too much for you to handle.

Once your bodies have adjusted to each other, Michael begins to move, slowly but firmly, making sure he goes deep enough to make you moan every time. His grunts and the sound of him sliding in and out of you almost make you miss Ashton’s moans. You open your eyes again and look over to the older man. He looks so hot, sprawled out in the chair stroking himself with the speed and ferocity he usually fucks you with. The sight brings you that much closer to your climax as you moan his name. Michael adjusts his angle slightly before slamming into you particularly hard. “No!” He reprimands, “focus on me, sugar! Moan my name, not sir’s!”

The determination in Michael’s thick tone of voice and the intensity in his eyes as you meet them once more prove too much for you. “Fuck, Mike!” You whine, “I’m gonna cum, please, please… I need to…”

“Only if you tell me it’s for me.” Michael replies, never breaking his rhythm, pounding into you hard and fast until you’re trembling with the effort to delay your orgasm for another moment. You ultimately fail, coming apart beneath him, moaning his name louder than you thought possible given how sore your throat is.

Your confirmation that he’s responsible for your orgasm is Michael’s undoing. He follows you over the edge a second later before collapsing on top of you with an exhausted but satisfied groan. One glance over at Ashton’s slumped form in the chair, tells you that he’s recovering from his own climax, too.

“Was I good?” Michael asks as he carefully pulls out of you. His question is aimed at Ashton as much as you, proving that he’ll never tire of being praised by both of you.

“Yes.” You reply breathlessly. “Really fucking good, Mike.”

Ashton pushes himself to his feet before heading over to unfasten your wrists. Michael flops down onto the bed beside you, eyeing ashton expectantly, awaiting his answer.

Once your wrists are free, Ashton takes the restraints back to the chest where they belong before heading back to the bed. Michael cuddles into your side, his gaze still fixed on Ashton.

“You were perfect, Angel” The black haired man finally replies as he lays down on the bed at your free side. “You both were.”

Tag list: @clffrd @byxthexway @afuckingunicornn @painkillerash @thrillchaser @moonchildsblack @calumbbyyy @h0tsos @valentinelrh @sexgodashton @megz1985  @myfalsedevotion @aulxna @honeyedlashton @tea4sykes @ghostofmashton  @fairyintheglass @cashworthy @cashtonasfuck @opheliaaurora23 @5sosnsfw @theagenderwhocriedwolf

[thoughtfullyyoungduck]

Married at first sight AU part 4

A/N: I’m so sorry it took me so long to add another chapter! I’m thinking about applying for a writing course in college so i would really appreciate any honest opinion about my writing!

Summary: It’s time for Eddie’s part of the home-stays. Unfortunately, this also means that they’ll have to visit Sonia.

warning: there’s one sex joke in this (it’s Richie) and Sonia is in this so mental manipulation

@impalagurl67​  @juhavs​  @werenotinhawkinsanymore​ (sorry if you guys didn’t want to be tagged anymore) 

About five weeks into the experiment, Eddie is ready to call it quits. Not because Richie and him aren’t working as a couple, they are, really well actually, but because Eddie made a grave miscalculation.

He has long abandoned his own promise to leave the program as soon as possible, instead cherishing every date he and Richie go on that is paid by the production, spending more money on one date than Eddie has done in all his previous get-togethers ever.

It helps that for now they are in their own little world, away from every stress point of the daily life, in a place where they only have to focus on each other. He’s not ready yet to have to go back to work, or to move away from Richie, with him living in New York, and Richie residing in Chicago. Richie made him fall hard, and now he doesn’t think he ever wants to go to a house without him, for that house would not be a home.

As per consensus, Richie and him agreed on staying right until the week before the homestay at Eddie’s to avoid having to go and live with Sonia. The thing is, neither of them really kept track of what week they were on, for days in the same place blended together rather easily, or what the next would bring, not while they were having so much fun.

There’s no one else to blame but his own stupidity for that error, since they days before the commitment ceremony, they went to Richie’s homestay. It was only natural that Eddie’s followed. When that was revealed, Eddie and Richie looked at each other in shock, both of them cursing their obliviousness and forgetfulness, but by then, it was too late.

Suggesting that they forfeit anyway, Richie tried to help as best he could, but Eddie refused to do that, claiming it would portray them as a bad couple, and he wasn’t up for that; Richie deserved better than that. Not to mention his career. If they were to call it quits now, an explanation was obligatory, and that might result in reputation damage. For someone who worked in the business Richie did, that was not permissible.

That’s why they find themselves in a plane with destination New York, Eddie gripping Richie’s arm tightly, praying to whoever was up there to help them make it through the week. One might argue that Eddie isn’t forced to go see his mother, it’s only the home-stay, which means go to your own home, and Eddie wouldn’t have gone to her, if she didn’t live with him.

The last time they were on the plane, only days prior to this, their moods had been significantly better, Eddie full of anxious excitement at the prospect of meeting the people he had heard so much about.  

Maggie and Wentworth Tozier lived in a fairly small house, only 30 minutes away from where their son lived, with a medium sized garden filled with all sorts of flowers and herbs. It may not have been as big as Eddie’s house was growing up, nonetheless it exhibited a warmth and serenity, the flowers and spices creating scents that lingered every time they entered the backyard, a welcome aroma that greeted them.

Maggie loved to bake, roping Richie and Eddie into baking one with her and bonding, while Wentworth set the table, and showed them his collection of Richie’s comedy specials, disks all neatly combined in one folder.

Their support in everything their son did was heartwarming, but it also pushed Eddie out of his comfort zone, made him feel out of place. He didn’t have that sort of support system, and he was clueless on how to act around parents who did.

Richie assured him that his parents adored him, and Eddie believed him, mostly since he was completely amoured by them too, and he hoped that they deemed him good enough for their son.

Right after dropping by his parents, the two of them went to Richie’s home. His apartment was the same size as Eddie’s in New York, the only difference being that Eddie’s was much neater, not filled with so much unnecessary stuff and memories. There were a lot of pictures, most of them of Richie and his parents, and the friends he made during stand up, but also a few of a dog he once owned as a kid.

The pictures forced Eddie to think about his own apartment, bare of anything that made the place him. He only had one picture, and that was the photograph that was taken when he was thirteen with his mom coiling him in her grasp, scolding when he didn’t smile bright enough for her liking.

He listened to her, as he always did, the smile more manufactured than her figurines she bought from China, but he remembers how much he longed to be in his room so he had the change to cry in peace, helpless and stuck while she controlled him like a puppet. He swore to himself that day that he’d stick up for himself, and defy her, but his rebellion only lasted a month, before he realized that it did nothing but cause her claws to stick in deeper, and stealing the little freedom he had.

He’s ashamed of himself for living with his mother, and for allowing her to wring her way back into his daily life like he needed her to be there for every decision, but it’s hard to be brave when you have no one else to fall back on. He never had a reason to fight back, but with Richie, he has found one.

His idea was to talk to his mother after the show, keeping his foot down and demanding her to move out, but since the wedding, he ignored every single call his mom made, convincing himself that he needed a little bit of extra time to gain the courage.

Because he dropped of the grid and didn’t contact her in any way, he understood that he needed to call her, at the very least to let her know Richie and him were coming.

However, Richie and him hopped on a plane first thing after a meeting with the experts, leaving him with no time at all to warm his mother about their arrival, and without a proper conversation between the two of them.

He’s certain, that as soon as Richie walks over the threshold, she’ll chew him up, and then spit him out like he’s a filthy piece of dog shit. And god damnit Eddie is sick of her being allowed to do those things without any consequences. Someone should say something about it, and that someone should be him.

The whole trip, he divides his time between prepping Richie for the monster that his mother can be if she opts for it, thankful that the cameras are nowhere in sight, and assessing every possible outcome to prevent a huge blowout from occurring.

He will address her about her behavior, just not on television broad cast, so he’ll try the whole week to appease her, without throwing Richie under the bus. That’s a slippery slope to ride on.

His husband, for five weeks already yet the word still causes him to brighten up, is animatedly practicing for his next movie roll, and cracking jokes, attempting and achieving to mollify some of Eddie’s fears away.

‘Hey Eddie Spaghetti, how much you want to bet that I can indulge this whole sandwich in one bite?’

‘If you even try, I’ll leave you on this plane all by yourself.’

‘Auch, dully noted.’

His mother may be a horrible person, but this time he won’t have to face her alone. That also is reason for concern be as that may, because even despite the fact that Eddie told Richie all about his mother, there’s a whole lot of difference between hearing about it, and seeing it in the flesh.

Though he obsesses and over analyses every possible outcome of his sudden appearance with his mother, he is taking aback by her reaction none the less. Knocking on his front door, after ensuring Richie to take everything that comes out of her mouth with a grain of salt, the sight of her tight-lipped smile emerges.

She’s wearing the same dress she wore on the day of the wedding, the door clenched in her fists, glancing at them with glare she is careful to keep hidden from everyone who is unfamiliar with her. It’s one of her specialties, to mask how much hell she’s about to bestow upon Eddie towards other people.

Eddie immediately knows that she is livid, and by the hand that falls on his lower back, he can tell Richie understands it too.

‘Come in Eddie-bear’, she invites them in, as if the flat isn’t registered in Eddie name instead of hers. Eddie allows himself one more moment of hesitation, before faltering inside.

The minute he steps in, he wants to run back out. The walls metaphorically close in on him, like he is going to buried under the concerns and scrutiny of his mother, hiding him from every real love he could ever hope to get.

It’s torture, and he fights against every instinct in him to stay put. The place has been under his name for six years, and when he first bought it, he associated the place with new beginning and freedom, causing him to happily skip home after school every day. He discovered what kind of person he is here, what his personality entails, and he despises the fact that, just like with everything else, his mother took this away too.

His knees start to get a little weak, and Eddie thinks he might pass out any second, until Richie comes up beside him, his arm thrown over his waist and allowing Eddie to lean his weight on him, all his muscles relaxing after being cramped up in fight or flight mode.

A feather-light kiss is pressed to his forehead, Richie’s body shielding him from the camera and Sonia’s havoc eyes for barely a minute, but enough for Eddie to compose himself.

‘Hi miss K, I’m Richie.’ The greeting is one that is so unlike Richie that Eddie comes close to calling the whole thing off, his heart bleeding with the need to protect and preserve everything good about the man who is goofy and kind-hearted.

‘Richard,’ Sonia allows with a curt nod, inching her body away from Richie when he tries to hug her as a salutation. He doesn’t let it get to him, Richie’s polite smile remains on his face, determined to prove to her that he is above all that pettiness that she’s displaying.

The camera man shuffles closer, presumably zooming in on Richie’s face, gauging his reaction. Her attempt to conceal her distaste is not working effectively, but that is the opposite of a problem for the tv-show.

People eat drama up, and this will be no different, except that Eddie is now the one they’ll be gossiping about behind his back. A shiver rolls over his body, annoyance prickling the back of his neck. It’s easy to forget the cameras are rolling when he’s enjoying Richie’s company, but the reality that others observe them and every move they make is under scrutiny, is infuriating.

‘Oh Eddie-kins, it’s been so long since I’ve heard of you.’

She attempts to embrace him, but he only allows if for a second, detangling them to create more space between them. A mother touch should provoke a feeling of safeness, of care and love, but Sonia’s hugs always made it feel like tiny bugs crawled their way across his body, and no amount of whipping would ever get them off of him, and he avoided them at all costs.

Try as he might, he can’t fight the need to practically fall on his knees and apologies to her, his earlier determination about standing up for himself slipping away like water between his hands. He manages to shrug in lieu of it, but only by the skin of his teeth.

‘You look so skinny,’ she adds, true to form already doing her very best to poison his mind with the ideas of him being unwell. ‘I’ll bring you something to eat too.’

She spurns Richie, failing to ask him if he needs anything, marching to the kitchen.

Eddie grabs Richie’s hand, their finger interlocking while he catches the reassuring smile Richie gives him. ‘Wanna go see my room?’

‘Oh kinky Eds, and the first time I’m visiting too? I didn’t peg you for such a guy.’

With a gentle push of expiration and an accompanied eye-roll, he drags them over to his bedroom, the only space in the apartment that holds any worthwhile to him, or at least the a box hidden under his bed does. He guesses his mother will be busy with her tea , the one that Eddie has such a distaste for he almost dry heaves every time he takes a sip of, for a little while so they have a bit of time to spare.

The bedroom door remains open so the camera crew can pile in after them, their equipment enough to block the door from his mother’s prying eyes.

He crouches down on the floor in order to grab the box, pausing to really think things through, and then takes out just the picture, the lone one that was taking of both him and his father, previous to standing up, and joining Richie on the edge of the bed.

If he wants to relationship with Richie to work, he needs to reveal everything about him, including the parts that have yet to be healed, but he rules out that conversation until they’re alone.

There were more stuff in the box that belonged to his father, but those aren’t as important s the picture.

The photo gets muffled away out of sight of the camera, saved for a time when all the production crew has gone to bed.

His intent was to show Richie around the rest of the apartment, but the tea is prepared faster that he had foreseen, so he backlogs his plans, and they move to the living room.

His mother has, gracefully, packed a third mug, which she fills to the brim with her disgusting beverage, and offers up to them.

While Eddie and Richie choose the seat next to each other, his mother sits opposite to them, the tea sloshing on the table as she swirls it. Inwardly, Eddie cringes, the need to clean it up presenting itself with such a velocity that his hands shake.

‘So Eddie, talk to your mommy. How have you been?’ Eddie is muddled over her behavior. On the one hand, she is much calmer than he expected her to be, but on the other hand, he knows better than to let his guard down around her.

‘It’s been great mom, I’m really happy that I got paired with Richie’, he remarks. He’s being intentionally vague, as to not give her any ammo to verbally attack them with.

From the moment they stepped foot into the flat, she disdains Richie, never once addressing him, and it’s starting to get on Eddie’s nerves. He almost wishes she would scream, so sheltering himself and Richie is an option, whereas now it feels like he’s waiting for the punchline to drop.

‘Oh yes, Richard.’ The malicious sneer has resumed it’s place, her eyes squinted together as she leers at Richie. Richie’s posture shift, his body ridging but his mouth still firmly shut, biting his tong. The fact that Richie refrains from any sort of humor, or talking in general, leaves Eddie unsettled and on edge. He doesn’t like it, and the absence is an experience he’ll avoid as much as possible in the future.

‘What have they been feeding you Eddie-bear? You are so skinny. It’s not good for you you know, staying away from home for so long. Are you homesick? Is that why you’re barely eating?’

Embarrassment tints Eddie’s cheeks bright red, her treatment of him not unlike that five year old, condescending in the worst way.

The penny drops, and Eddie all at once understands what her game plan is. She’s trying to manipulate the situation so that it seems like Richie isn’t a good husband or partner, both for the tv show, and for Eddie.

She must have known that demanding Eddie to come home would have only resulted in him turning his back on her even more, so she ventured to do it in a different way.

‘Eddie is perfectly fine, misses K, his abs and frankly the rest of his body can vouch enough for that.’ Richie laughs, but the joke falls flat and dies out at the hard stare he receives. Tittering awkwardly, he clears his throat.

‘He isn’t homesick either, in fact, he told me that he loved to travel, he’s fine,’ Richie defends him, their legs locking under the table, not in view of the camera’s and his mother.

‘Even so, I’m very essential to my sons life, Richard. If you even consider being part of his, I come with the territory.’

‘Eddie is perfectly cable of being by himself, he doesn’t need anyone. Are you sure that it isn’t you that needs him?’

Sonia jumps up from her seat, her lukewarm drink spilling over the top and dripping of the side. She turns pale, her whole visage drained of any color, so utterly devoid of any other emotion other than enragement.

‘Do you hear that? Do you hear the way he speaks to me?’ She screeches to the lens-man, who blinks sheepishly at her, finding her outburst rather strange., as there was barely any provocation. The man glimpses at Eddie and Richie, who remain quite, and he follows their lead.

‘Eddie, force Richard out of here, he is no longer welcome. I won’t accept someone talking ill about me.’

‘He is mom’, Eddie states, his voice trembling somewhat, although the words don’t lack conviction.

‘Excuse me?’

‘This is my home, and you’re powerless to decide who comes through those doors.’ The camera is glaring right in his face and he is tempted to push it away, which is almost the perfect outlet for the anger he’s experiencing, but he’s better than that.

‘Eddie-bear’, she chuckles uncertain. ‘I’m just trying to look out for you. You’re delicate honey, and people like him,’ she spat at Richie, ‘will derail your mind.’

Scoffing, Eddie rises from his chair as well, establishing eye contact to assert dominance.

‘He won’t. But even if someone would try, they wouldn’t succeed.’ The picture in his pocket calls his attention, and his hand wonders into the pocket to touch it for a second, drawing strength from it.

‘Not anymore.’

Sonia gapes, her mouth opening and closing, unbelieving that her sweet, innocent boy said such a thing to her.

‘We’ll talk more when I get back, me and Richie are staying in a hotel tonight.’

He denies her the chance to reply and ruin the day even more, trudging outside with as much confidence he has. Richie says something to Sonia, out of hearing shot from Eddie, before he too, falls into step beside Eddie.

‘I’m sorry that this home-stay turned out to not be such a ‘home’-stay after all,’ Eddie apologizes, using air quotes on the word home.

‘Hey, Eds it’s fine. I don’t care where am I, as long as it’s with you.’

The blush returns, now for a whole different reason.

[trashinaglass-archive]

Family

Y/n is always included in Tom’s family ordeals

Request: Hi!! So I was wondering could you do a Tom X Reader where the reader kinda grew up not being close to her family and didn’t do typical “family stuff”, like vacations or fun holidays, and basically she starts dating Tom and his family is absolutely in love with her and are always including her in stuff, at first she’s shy and kinda doesn’t know how to act but later cries to Tom and his family and says how thankful she is for them? Thank you!

A/n: This is so cute. I’m basing this around a vacation bc I personally feel like that’s such a family time and being invited to join someone else’s holiday is a really big deal.

“You’re going, right, y/n?” Tom asked, pulling your attention away from the blank spot in the room.

“What?”

“To Switzerland? Snowboarding, skiing?” He caught you up, Nikki looking at you expectantly.

“Oh! I don’t- that’s a family thing, I don’t want to intrude,” you opposed.

“Don’t worry about that, darling. We would love for you to join us,” Nikki said.

“Do you have anything that week you’ll miss?” Tom asked. You scanned you brain thinking of your commitments, nothing keeping you from going.

“No,” you replied slowly.

“Then you should go. Come on, please?” Tom was close to begging. “First holiday together- it’ll be so much fun.”

You shook your head, thinking of another excuse. “I don’t have the money to pay for any of that.”

“We’ll take care of that for you,” Nikki promised. “We love you, and we want you to come with us.”

“Think of all the family dinners and events you’ve been to,” Tom said, seeing you still looked unsure. “This is no different. I promise.”

“I guess if you insist,” you gave in.

. . .

“This place is gorgeous,” you commented as you made your way through the chalet.

“Dibs on the biggest room!” Paddy yelled as he began running through the rented home.

“Oh no you don’t!” Sam yelled, running after him. You shook your head, smiling as you watched the two boys run amuck. Your eyes drifted as you felt a hand on your waist, Tom’s mouth right next to your ear.

“Glad you came now?” He asked, recalling the uncertainty you had when they first invited you. You rolled your eyes playfully as he placed a kiss to your temple. “Let’s find a room.”

You two began walking through the unfamiliar house, peeking into rooms as you passed them. The parents in the master bedroom, the twins in a room with two twin beds, an empty room with another set of twin beds, and Paddy in a room with a queen size bed.

“Pads, there’s a room by Mum and Dad. Let us have this room,” Tom stated, walking into the room and placing his bag on the bed. You stood in the doorframe and watched as the younger boy’s jaw dropped.

“But I was here first!” He fought.

“Paddy, you’re like two feet tall and three inches wide, you don’t need a bed this big.”

“Why can’t you guys just take the other room?”

“Because it has kid beds and this is the adult bed, just switch,” Tom pleaded, obviously annoyed with his brother.

“I don’t want to,” Paddy said, crossing his arms and staring Tom down.

“Would you-“ Tom started, but you interrupted him.

“Well, I guess if you want the room so bad, Paddy, you can have it, but I think Tom should bunk with you.”

“What?” Tom and Paddy both asked.

“I mean, this bed is huge. There’s no reason for one person to take it. You guys share and I’ll take the other room by myself,” you offered, giving Tom a subtle nod, hoping he was catching your drift.

“Sounds good to me,” Tom nodded back, looking at Paddy.

“No, I don’t want to share a bed with you,” he protested.

“Then take the other room, but I’m sleeping here,” he continued, unpacking his bag. You saw Paddy throw his hands out, letting out a groan before grabbing his own bag.

“Fine,” he muttered moving past you to the other room.

“And that’s how you persuade younger siblings to do what you want them to,” you said softly moving to where Tom stood.

“And this is why I need you on holiday with me,” he replied with a laugh, high fiving you. “Let’s go see what they’ve got planned first.”

. . .

“I’ve never done any of this before,” you admitted as you walked through the rental place. You followed Tom as he and his brothers looked at the snowboards and skis, knowing exactly what they were looking for.

“Really?” He asked, looking at you as you nodded. “Don’t worry about it. It’s pretty easy- you’ll get the hang of it after a few tries. And knowing how good you are at other things, I’d say you’ll be pretty good.”

“Better than you?” You tease, watching as he pulled the board off the wall. He chuckled, looking at you.

“I don’t know about that,” he replied, a teasing tone in his voice. “I mean I am basically the best snowboarder.” You nodded your head as he spoke. Joking as well as trying to impress you, you found it pretty endearing. “But I’ll make sure you’re better than Harry and Sam at least.”

“Oh, thanks,” you replied, your smile mirroring his.

“Hold this for me,” He asked, handing you the snowboard as he turned back to pick one out for you, explaining whatever makes it easier for beginners for whatever reason. You didn’t really understand what any of it meant.

You all checked out with your rentals and headed straight for the slopes, you and Tom stopping at a small hill first so you could learn how to work the board. As Tom was showing you how to put the boots in the board, you realized everyone was standing around you.

“You guys can go ahead,” you told them. “Don’t worry about waiting for me.”

“We want to watch. It’s part of the fun,” Dom told you, Nikki nodding in agreement.

“Yeah, and we wouldn’t want to miss you falling on your ass,” Harry added with a smirk, Paddy and Sam laughing.

“Thanks for the boost of confidence,” you muttered, looking at Tom.

“Don’t worry- you’ll do fine. We all had to learn at one point too.” He demonstrated how to do everything while you watched, mimicking his movements along the way. It wasn’t long before you were taking your first slide down the hill. Tom held his hands out to you as you went down side by side, making sure you were steady. You grabbed him right at the bottom before you stopped, half scared but half excited.

“I did it!” You yelled excitedly.

“Yay, y/n!” The family cheered for you, making you feel even more confident in yourself.

“Do that a few more times then we’ll go up?” Tom suggested, making you nod. “Want to go by yourself?”

“Go with me one more time then I’ll go by myself,” you told him. He nodded and headed up with you, the second slide going as smooth as the first, not needing to grab onto Tom at all. The third time you went up by yourself, prepping yourself before going down, Tom and fam cheering for you. As you were close to the bottom, you threw your arms out, feeling accomplished, causing you to stumble. Tom catching you before you hit the ground.

“Right, don’t do that,” he told you with a chuckle , steadying you again. You went up one last time before going up the lift to the top of the mountain.

“What if I fall?” You asked Tom, officially nervous now that your we’re at the top.

“Just try keep yourself steady. If you do fall though, tuck into yourself. I’m right behind you if anything happens,” he assured you. “You want a hand?” He asked, holding his hand out to you to take if you wanted it.

You shook your head, “I want to try by myself.”

“Keep up if you can!” Sam yelled as he passed you on his board, Paddy and Harry following.

“Come on,” Tom said, gesturing with his head and slowly starting his way down the hill, you following him.

“Yeah, y/n! You’re doing so good!” The parentals cheered from behind you, a huge smile on your face.

. . .

After a long day of snowboarding and falling, you were all back in the chalet. The boys were playing football in the hallway while Nikki and Dom discussed something in the dining room. Tom had you sat on the couch, foot on the table with an ice pack on your knee, soothing the ache from your few tumbles. A movie was on while you rest your head on his shoulder.

“Thank you,” you spoke softly to him. “I know I’m not family, but-“

“No. You are my family. Our family- we all love you, and we want you around for times like this because it’s special to us, we don’t want you to miss out because you’re worried about overstepping.”

You looked down with a soft smile, a few tears in your eyes. “I’ve just never had this before. My family is so dysfunctional; I’m not used to all this.”

“Being on holiday?” He asked in disbelief.

“Being on holiday, having people wait for me to do something, them cheering for me when I did it. People caring about me like I wished they would.”

Tom’s hand tangled itself in your hair, pressing his forehead into yours as he heard the emotion in your voice.

“I love you. Mum loves you. Dad loves you. Harry and Sam love you. Paddy loves you. Tessa loves you,” he began to list off, the latter making you giggle. “You have a place with us. Whenever and why-ever you may need it.”

“Is that even a word?” You questioned.

“I don’t know, but it works,” he shrugged. “Don’t worry about overstepping. You’re were you belong.”

You felt him place a kiss to your forehead before repositioning, the side of his head against yours. You’d never felt so comfortable or happy before, and you never wanted it to change.

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