#both of them looking for physical signs of humanity in god

[3uthym1c]

𓆩⚝𓆪 ☒ 𝐏𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐀 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐝! 𝘈𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘍𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘯𝘦𝘳

𓏲 ๋࣭     ࣪ ˖    ⋆ ࣪.     ˖ ࣪⭑  ˖ ࣪ ٬     ุ๋ ⸱    ִֶָ . ָ࣪   ˑ ֗⭑  ˖ ࣪ ٬     ุ๋ ⸱    ִֶָ . ָ࣪   ˑ ֗ ˖    ⋆ ࣪.     ˖ ࣪⭑      ࣪ ˖    ⋆ ࣪. ⸱    ִֶָ . ָ࣪  

Ꮺ Read before getting into your group please! THERE IS A MESSAGE FOR EVERYONE AT THE END!!!

Hey y'all, it's me and I'm back. I told y'all I don't have a PAC uploading schedule 😭. I honestly just do it whenever I feel that I have the energy and then recharge. Perhaps when I'm in my "tarot reading hibernation" I'll take free requests so stay tuned (I'll have to figure out rules for requests first 😭).

Remember that you can pick more than one and to choose what resonates and STAY HYDRATED!!! I've never done a love reading before so feedback would be very appreciated.

⋆｡° ✮ ᴘɪʟᴇ ᴏɴᴇ

For physical features I see that they have brown hair (light or dark brown). For some, your partner might have dreads, locs, or very intricate braids. Their skin may be brown or tanned (or tan easily). They have such an infectious and bright smile, it's like their whole face lights up and it's so beautiful to everyone seeing it. They're muscular, but in skinny way? I don't know how to explain it. Kind of like runners? As for their clothes or clothing style, they might wear either all black or white with a few pops of color. Like an example would be a dark t-shirt with a bright red collar thing and a necklace with a big yellow crystal.

They carry so so so much enthusiasm. Right off the bat they just bring a light very few can bring. They bring so much to people just by existing. inspiration, hope, enlightenment even? They don't even have to be extroverted they just have and give so much energy. They have so many silly little thoughts they share every now and then that seem to come out of nowhere. Their biggest character strength is gratitude. They feel so thankful for everything and everyone and they'll let you know. Oh my god pile 1 you're so lucky this person is so in love with life and will make you in love with life even more than you currently do. They will make you love being human the and feeling and tasting and dancing and experiencing that come with it. It'll have you seeing beauty in the everyday things.

Right now they're going through some really intense spiritual transformation. They need to learn to ask for help when they need it. They'll do well though. They'll find a lot of things could've been solved by just asking for help. Both you and them are at the beginning of your journeys (that doesn't mean your journey is long though), so if you guys think things are already good then I'm thinking of the phrase "universe, show me how good it can get". They're such a good cook & baker by the way. They have a lot of earth and fire placements. Extremely romantic in both the loveydovey type and the artsy sense.

When you come into their life it's very much random and unexpected. My sister just unexpectedly found an item that cleans her flute so I'll take it as a sign that you guys meet at a music / dance event or concert. Perhaps in the same class taking music lessons. Also random message: this meeting is just unavoidable, no matter what you do they'll find their way to you so don't worry. Even if you guys meet, have a conversation, and leave, you guys will keep bumping into each other. Months into your relationship, both of you will look back at this meeting as something purely magical. If they don't believe in fate or magic or some higher power, this will change their mind.

I'm also hearing, "It's so beautiful how deeply you feel." You may have been looked down on for being "overly sensitive" and "caring too much" but they very much appreciate it. Also hearing "Whatever you say, beautiful." like if you told them to do something crazy they wouldn't even question it. Literally remembered this image:

🍈 ☒ Key Words / Items / Etc: The Chariot (representing them), Ruby, the word "baroque", Soprano, Clownfish, Horses, Bells, Lemons, roses, letter S.

⋆｡° ✮ ᴘɪʟᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ

Straight dark brown or black hair, they like wearing more simple outfits most of the time with neutral colors but there will be days where they're like "screw it I'm going to dress all fancy just to go to the library". Often carries a backpack or suitcase or purse everywhere. Worst case of RBF (resting bitch face) ever, but their face is so gentle and pretty too. Maybe wears black glasses (maybe prescription maybe not). A little random but you might find that they look so hot when they're focused? Really nice hands, they might like to wear rings or gloves. Would probably let you paint their nails.

But when you get to know them they're actually goofy and sometimes they don't even know it. "Apartment complex? I find it quite simple actually." vibes. I think a lot of people don't like how confident they look and say stuff like "They think they're better than us." when they never even act like that. Warning they have so many haters and it isn't because they even did or said anything, people see them and their confident energy and assume so so SO much about them. They don't know that though, because to them it seems like they hate your S/O for no reason and they're so confused. In reality they're so soft and kind hearted.

Random thing - they might really like penguins? They have ungodly amounts of patience for everything and everyone it's mind boggling. They're either interested or uninterested in things, so if they're interested they will put their heart and soul into whatever it is. You can see it so well in their work and career, whatever it may be. Embodiment of the word "Meraki". Btw your S/O doesn't want me to "spoil any surprises" take it as you wish.

EDIT: Holy shit there was whole entire paragraph about what I'd guess is the "surprise" that somehow didn't end up in the reading when I copy / pasted it from Notion to tumblr?????

Going to add more to this, it seems that your partner is super shy and a little awkward if that makes sense? Like, if you ever have done readings about specific people, while you may not HEAR their voice, you can kind of feel the vibes of them talking? They kind of remind me of the smell after the rain (which if you're curious, no it was not raining at the time of me doing this reading).

🍈 ☒ Key Words / Items / Etc: Meraki (obviously), Cats, purple & blue, the letter R, birds visiting your backyard often, 777,

⋆｡° ✮ ᴘɪʟᴇ ᴛʜʀᴇᴇ

Instead of starting with physical appearance I think I want to start off with what they're like. Right off the bat their energy is very easy to tap into (in a good way). In fact, after I was done with pile two, I kept on getting intuitive messages for two whole days on what they're like. This whole entire pile I didn't even have to draw a single card. at all. They're extremely talkative, and I wouldn't be surprised if you constantly recieved messages and signs from them. I'd imagine it would be like recieving a loud notification on your phone because honestly whatever chance they get, their higher self constantly is there checking in on you.

They have an incredible sense of humor first of all. They will never fail to make you laugh. I hope this makes sense, but they're almost like a walking four leaf clover or lucky charm. Wherever they go they just bring good luck to themselves and people around them. Perhaps their very existence is a miracle. Their birthday may be in May. This is going to sound weird and no shade to your S/O but they're the type of person you wouldn't expect to be so smart. Usually people think of smart people as like, these serious nerdy looking people, but this person is genuinely so so smart and good at talking to others.

I bet how you guys will meet is that you'll be struggling with something and they'll walk into your life and help you. They have the sort of magic of a teacher that can explain the hardest topics so easily. One of their weaknesses is that they're a little too afraid to ask help for themselves. This person isn't JUST good boy/girl/joyfriend material, but also a great spouse.

Wouldn't be surprised if they have light hair or are ginger. If they have dark hair it's probably dyed. Their hair is so fluffy and if it's long it's very nice to just run your hand in. A very comfortable style, I could imagine that they sometimes wear soft pastel colors (Blue, green, orange mostly) or neon. Hoodlies, loose clothing, handmade clothes.

🍈 ☒ Key Words / Items / Etc: Four leaf clovers, 444, cats with different colored eyes (kinda specific), spiders, random light colored yarm / wool.

⋆｡° ✮ ᴘɪʟᴇ ꜰᴏᴜʀ

Your partner is probably much taller than you. They probably have silver jewelry and long hair. They put in a LOT of effort into how they look, they always look so fashionable. They also take great care of their body too. I don't think it's to the point where they're vain though, they just take care of themselves and like dressing cool. They may have blue, green, or grey eyes.

First of all, this may come to a shock to you but your partner is very spiritual. When you meet them they'll probably have already spent years learning about and practicing their spirituality. Everyone that meets them thinks that they're mentally just wise beyond their years, and I don't mean when it comes to academics (though that might be the case). There's just something about them that makes them feel like they've been on this earth for a long long time and have witnessed many things and met many people.

They may actually be a historian, anthropologist, archivist, librarian, psychologist, or sociologist. Okay I've just been having this stuck in my head while doing this reading but I'm imagining like, a rock or statue with moss growing on it. Also I'm feeling strangely calm and warm right now. I don't know if "calm" would even describe it, it's like complete serenity.

When you meet them it might be in somewhere incredibly crowded, but it'll feel like it's just the two of you. You could maybe meet them through a friend and have a nice long night drive talking to each other. They genuinely love you. I mean obviously this is a future partner reading so of course they would, but this love runs so deep. There's not any way that I can get you to fully understand the depths of this love, so you'll just have to wait and see!

They're the type of person that makes people comfortable enough to be themselves without worrying about judgement, mostly because to be honest this person is seen as "weird" themselves. You make them love humanity, is another message I'm getting.

Also a note that I didn't even pull cards for this, it was all intuitive so usually I take it as a sign this person's energy / presence is strong and you probably receive messages and signs from their higher self a lot. Or maybe their 3d human self consciously sends positive energy your way, a sign of this is randomly feeling warm and cozy and calm for no reason. P.S. they probably think about you as much as you think about them.

ALSO!!!! PILE 4 don't stop reading it yet there's a message I got for you guys but I feel called to put it at the end separately for all of the piles!

🍈 ☒ Key Words / Items / Etc: 888, blueberry, lights that flicker for no reason, or maybe dreams where you see some sort of light floating around, rainbows, bees, Magician card, the word "arbiter"

𝕄𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕒𝕘𝕖 𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝔼𝕍𝔼ℝ𝕐 ℙ𝕀𝕃𝔼!!!

I know someone (not all of you) is thinking "Nahh this sounds too good to be true", well 1. that's the magic of soul connections and love & 2. Please stop lowering your standards because it's "unrealistic" because I swear you're not asking for much from a person. You deserve something "too good to be true" bestie (And also, remember, YOU are a dream come true for them too 😭).

"Why me what's so special about me 🫤 " on god you're the type of person who asks for signs from your spirit guides and then ignores them like they're tiiiireeedddd. Real talk though, you don't know how beautiful you are to a strangers eyes because you grow accustomed to your face. You don't know how smart and amazing you are (and yes knowing a lot about a random show or book or random subject counts as being smart shhh).

You are so perfectly human you just DON'T KNOWWW. I

f you think like this (or even if you don't because we should all do this), I'm giving you homework. Make a list of everything you are grateful for yourself for doing / being, what topics and interests you have, your favorite fashion style, achievements, color, animal, your favorite song, things you have around the house that you like and why, etc.

YOU ARE AN INTERESTING PERSON!!!! If you have a good relationship with your parents / guardians or grandparents or aunts or siblings, ask them what they love about you. Get to know yourself!!! A lot of things are cool and special about you!!!!!!!!!

-Eiki

[alien-magnolia]

Being Jake Sully’s Babygirl

Fic description: 18 + minors DNI!! Domestic life with your husband, Jake, has never been better. He was Toruk Makto, and even, he needed someone to care for him after a long day in the forest. Dom!jake Sully, subby!fem reader, breeding kink, service kink, corruption / innocence kink, daddy kink, size kink, bj, lil bit of age gap (dilf Jake!)

It was almost eclipse, the sun and moon meeting to form a golden halo in the Pandoran sky. You loved domestic life with your mate. Before you met him, you were just incomplete, both emotionally and physically. Who knew you had such an urge to be cared for, to be doted on, I mean it was predictable, you were just so helpless on your own!

You grew up in the Omaticaya as amongst the slowest and one of the weakest, you could never be taronyu, hunter, although you did have your own ikran. You were a healer instead, and vowed to yourself to never associate with men who are taronyu. You feared they would soil your good nature. You feared them, you were a gentle little thing that should just keep to the healers. That changed when Jake Sully came around.

His (previous) human nature puzzled you, yet that was what you loved about him. He was so brave, not afraid, he had a strong heart! You knew that you’d do anything for him, and that he felt the same. He vowed to you, to always protect and care for you, as your mate, when the two of you finally mated under the tree of voices. 

He stayed true to that vow. He woke you this one morning, his large hand rubbed gentle circles in your back as you woke up to look at him. “What is it, ma Jake?,” you murmur sleepily, making grabby hands at him, the secret sign the two of you had for a kiss. He chuckles and obliges, leaning in to kiss you gently. “I have a big hunt today with the war party. Just wanted to let you know, ma muntxate.” You are concerned. “Ma Jake. You won’t get hurt, right?,” your doe eyes stare back into his. 

“God damn. She’s gonna be the death of me,” Jake thinks to himself, as he thinks of ways to reassure his mate. “I won’t, ma yuey. I am Olo’eyktan, don't you worry. I’ll think of you on the hunt.” You smile, a sigh of relief. “I’ll miss you, ma Jake. Don’t know what I’ll do without you,” you say, as you reach up to cling onto him for a bit. That was one of your favorite things to do, was to just stay wrapped up in his big, strong arms. It was the safest place in the world for you!

“You’ll hurry back soon, ma Jake?,” you ask innocently. Jake chuckles. What he wouldn’t do to just miss the hunt entirely so he can stay home and fuck you until you couldn’t walk. Obligations as Olo’eyktan called. “I Will, don’t you worry, sweetheart. You just stay home today, ok? No going out into the forest or nothin.’,” he chides at you. God, he was so overprotective, and you loved it!! 

You agree, he gives you another quick kiss before he gets his weapon and sets off on his ikran to meet the others in the war party, they were at the edge of the forest. You decide to tidy up around the hut for him, but not before getting dressed for the day. 

You opted with a lovely blue-green bead top, with a shell necklace and a few pink feathers for your hair. You felt the hut would look a little better with some flowers inside, so you went out into the forest to find some. Jake usually scolded you if you went out by yourself, for some reason, that made you feel more love for him. You scatter the blue-green petals and leaves all over the hut. 

Next is dinner. Usually, Jake was the one bringing it back to you, but you couldn’t wait for all the praise that was to come if you made him something. You loved it when he praised you, it made you feel so warm and fuzzy!! You went out to pick out some teylu worms, and made a little fire to cook them over. After they were cooked, you put them on a leaf with some flowers scattered over it, and left it wrapped up in the hut. He needed rest too, after all. The fact that he had ten years on you didn’t help, either. He wasn’t that young anymore, and you just wanted to take care of him, like a good little house mate should! 

Eclipse was starting. He will be back soon. For the finishing touches, you wrapped a few leafs around your hips, a makeshift shirt. You knew this was similar to what humans wore. Maybe your mate will like it. You hear the screech of his ikran outside. He was back. You quickly unwrap his dinner, and scatter over to the door to wait for him.

 You hear him climb up the tree, using his muscles to drag up whatever he got from the hunt. He walks through the doorway, slamming a hexapede wrapped in a large jungle leaf onto the floor. “Hey, sweetheart. Had a good day?,” he asks, with a bit of pep to his tired voice. “Yes, ma Jake. I did,” you slyly remark, coming up to him, so he could get a full view of you. He raises his thin eyebrows, yellow eyes hungrily gazing over your decorated little body. 

“Got all dolled up f’me, sweets? You look fuckin’ adorable. C’mere,” his large arms open up to you, which you gladly run into. His fingers tilt your chin up, keeping your head in place as he gives you a long, sweet kiss, which you gladly accept. “What’s all this, huh?,” your mate teases, his smile growing wider as he takes a look around the marui hut. “Did this for you, ma Jake. Want to take care of you. Make you feel good. It is what humans call, a housewife?,” you say, innocently, with a hint of confusion. 

Jake grunts again, his ears folding back, his tail erratic, matching yours. “Is something wrong, yawne?,” you ask. You wonder if you did something wrong. He was supposed to like this! You quickly think of what to do next, since it looked like he did not like your little surprise for him. Jake chuckles, his voice a bit deeper than before. “No, sweetheart. I’m just a lil’ shocked you did this all f’me. You wanna be my housewife huh? Little wife, mate, to take care of her warrior when he needs it?,” he coos at you, his voice slow, deep. You nod quietly as he walks over to the far end of the hut, sitting down, his hands working quickly to untie his loincloth. 

His cock springs up to attention, a large vein on the side pulsing, had you drooling at the sight. “You gonna listen to daddy?” You nod eagerly. “Good girl. Now crawl on over to me, princess,” your mate says as he taps his lap, his cock all angry and waiting for you!! You drop down onto your knees, he smirks, watching you like a predator watches his prey, as you begin to slowly make your way over to him. 

Your dainty little hands grab his large, blue thigh, as you reach his lap, waiting for his next command. “Want y’a to give Daddy’s cock here a nice lil massage, yeah, kid? Nice and gentle.” You nod, the sight of his cock just made you so,so, squirmy! You arch your back, lowering your head so his pulsing cock is at eye level. You reach out your hand to cup his balls gently, you just couldn’t wait to see them swell!!

You use both your palms to cup his balls, you bring your lips down to give them a little kiss <3 after that, moving up to give his cock a few kisses as well,  your tongue tracing that vein on the left of the shaft. You hold eye contact with him, his yellow eyes dilated, his broad chest heaving. “God damn. That’s a good girl,” he lets out a low chuckle, with a hint of a purr. He only purred when he was with you, and you were so lucky to see this side of him. 

His hand, as large as your entire face, comes down to stroke your cheek and rub your head a bit. He was pleased. Good. You just wanted to love on your mate!! “Fuck. How’d I get so lucky, huh? Got a sweet lil’ thing like you around to keep me young.” You nod, giddy with a huge smile adorning your face. You could take his cock all day, only if he’d let you.

One thing you loved about being his mate was the age difference. Jake had around fifteen years on you, his voice was so much deeper than the Na’vi men your age, you loved his stocky arms, you’d sometimes nuzzle your head into his neck, his large head, chiseled jawline!! Younger Na’vi men had none of that. Most essentially, they never had that caring, guiding, almost dad-like way to them. Jake did. Ever since the two of you mated, Jake knew that he had to protect you, love and dote on you. You were his sickeningly sweet and helpless other half. You were his babygirl, and he’d kill for you. 

Your mind drifted back to your most important object that you presently had to attend to. Your mate’s twitching cock. You scoot forward on your knees, folding your legs under you and opening your mouth. Jake chuckles. “There’s a good girl. Didn’t even have to tell you, and you’re already on your knees f’me. Open up, sugar.”

He stands up, towering over you as the leaking tip of his cockhead pushes past your wet, blue lips. You close your lips around it, sucking gently, your tongue traces around the entire tip itself!! His cock just was so big compared to your mouth. You started to gag a bit, but you held those tears back, you didn’t want to disappoint your mate. He only deserves the best, after he spent such a long day in the forest.

 “Aww. Too big f’ ya?,” he taunts. You quickly shake your head, afraid to disappoint him. “That’s what I thought, girl. You got me all nice and wet. Want you on the bed though, sugar,” he condescendingly notes at you, tapping on the mat the two of you slept on, as if he was calling on some kind of pet. 

You quickly move to the hut. It was routine --- you knew what to do. Jump on, on your back, legs open, face forward. Jake slowly moves in, a predator admiring his meal. You feel a little shy, a little vulnerable, you always did when he simply stared at you like that. “Hey.” 

Your eyes quickly moved onto him. “Eyes on daddy, sweetie.” You do as said. “There ya go. Not that hard, is it?,” he asks, cool and collected. 

You nod -- slow, like a scared little lamb. Your small hand coming up to trace patterns on his stomach, toned, with a bit of pudge to it. His broad chest, sometimes you wondered how many stripes he had on him. Those wide, stocky, veiny arms always distracted you, though. It did not help that those same arms were gripping your hips, squeezing your plush, little, body. 

“Fuck, sweetie. Gotta be in you.” He teased you, you shuddered, as he moved in between your legs, swiftly lifting your thighs to drape over his shoulders, with no effort at all. “Open up f’daddy, sweetheart,” he coos at you, as his cock pushes into your dripping, sopping cunt, his throbbing length filling you up, so, so, sweetly!! His now swollen balls lightly touch upon you as he begins to thrust, at first slowly. 

You had your eyes closed for a second. “D’aww. Daddy’s cock too much for his little mate? Eyes open. Don’t make me tell you again.”  A threat. He was in a certain mood. You were there for him to use. You quickly open your eyes to see him towering over you, grunting as he works you to orgasm. You were just his little house mate after all, and you should not have to do any of the work here. Here, he takes care of you!!

One of his large hands comes to pin yours down onto the mat, effectively restraining you. You try to wiggle free, yet his grip was tight, like molded metal. You knew — whenever he had you pinned like this, it was some of his predatory instincts shining through. It just made you even wetter. 

“Daddy…,” you wail out, as he starts pushing in and out of you, at a faster speed, his cock sending you into another world!! He buries his face into your neck, you feel his sharp fangs graze your shoulder slightly, biting down. His grunts turn to growls, hisses, your moans into little yelps and squeals. He was in control as a hunter in the forest, he was in control here, as your mate, your daddy, who took care of you, loved on you, and at the same time drove you insane with his special way of looking after you!! 

“Yeah, sweetie. Lie there and take it. Daddy’s almost done, yeah? Taking this cock like the perfect little girl you are, yeah?,” he grunts out, you feel him twitching inside you. “Want your knot! Ma Jake, please!!,” you beg him. He growls in response. You only were so pathetic for him. Just for him. Your man. He brought you over the edge, along with him. The both of you were so distracted by each other: ears folded back, tails erratically swishing, like two animals in heat, that Jake ended up giving you his knot. 

You felt it swell inside you, basically it was just an evolutionary safeguard — making sure his cock stayed in you for quite some time. Making sure you were bound to carry his child. 

“God damn,” he huffs out, a bit less delirious than he just was. “Gave you my knot, sweet thing. Looks like every Na’vi in this damn village is gonna know who y’a belong to, huh, girl?,” he softly says, as his lips give you a few pecks on your cheek, his hand cradling your face now.  “Yes, ma Jake. I’m yours,” you sweetly purr back at him. You lay your head on his chest after he has flipped the two of you over. Your ear against his squishy (but firm!) chest, you hear his slow, deep purrs compared to your faster ones.

He had his baby girl all knotted under him, he came home after a tough day in the forest to be comforted by the soft womb of his mate. She was so unlike him, and that made his attachment to her grow stronger, every day. 

She felt the same, she loved having a big, strong warrior to provide for her!! She loved that she was going to have this big, strong warrior’s child soon, too.

If you like this post pls help a writer out and reblog 🖤

Avatar taglist: @aerangi @jake-sullys-whore @drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed @23victoria

[thefallennightmare]

Just Pretend-Twenty Two

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: PHASE II comes to an end! Strap in everyone, PHASE III is going to be a smutty ride.

FUCK YOU. EAT SHIT. KILL GOD. DETHRONE.

We are Fallenvvitch. Goodnight.

🪽🔮

Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)

Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98 @loverofagoodbeard @comfortcharactercraze @lma1986 @plutonikchaos1 @spicywhenspeaking @lyschko666 @somewhere-diamond @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @koskeepsake @bngurngheart @shilohrosechicken @emzandthevoid @casangel1986 @qualityvoidcollectorsblog @myownthoughts12 @jilliemiw86 @bellaboo967 @halloweenaesthetic @collapsedglasshouses

NOAH

I let out a long sigh as I ran my hands over my thighs, the green couch becoming a familiar place for me. Even the dying plants on the shelf behind Dr. Poulos brought a sense of comfort. She had her book open on her lap, tapping her pen against it. 

Three times.

She always tapped it three times. 

“You seem happier today Noah,” Dr. Poulos noted. 

I nodded. “I am. For the first time in a long time.” 

“That’s great,” she smiled warmly before she used her pen to point to her hair. “New look?” 

“Uh, it kind of happened. I didn’t expect to cut my hair, it’s been long for so many years now, but I felt with what happened I could use a change. But it still might be too long for my liking. I might cut it some more,” I said. 

“Hm, typically that’s a sign of some growth. What happened?”

For the next few minutes, I filled her in on almost everything that happened at Chase’s birthday party, leaving out the intimate details between Y/N and I. Although, with the way my cheeks burned red, I had a feeling Dr. Poulos already knew. 

I explained from top to bottom everything from the last time Y/N and I  spoke to the night she told me she loved me back. Even saying the term ‘I love you’ was a huge step on the mountain for me. But to have her say it back? I’m finally catching up on years of sleep. Y/N loves me. She fucking loves me back. 

“Do you believe her?” Dr. Poulos questioned. 

“I do! I do, I love her with all of me,” I answered with a stern nod. “I just don’t know how to stop worrying about Y/N leaving if shit gets messy or if I don’t live up to her expectations. There’s this perception of me out there and even so, I don’t want it to taint her or us.” 

She sat straighter in her chair. “Noah, you’re putting too much work on yourself. You really are. You’re both heavily aware of who you are as people. You’re human beings.”

Dr. Poulos adjusted her glasses and took some notes before speaking again when I remained silent.

“From everything you’ve explained; you both seem to be willing to start over. Start with a new slate, the situation at the party seemed to have changed the situation from both of your points of view. I have homework for you.”

I playfully rolled my eyes. “Oh, but you know I’m busy, I don’t have time to do homework. I haven’t done homework since I was 15.” 

“Not that type of homework,” she chuckled. “What I’m saying is now that we’ve set the foundation regarding perspective, energy, and intention, we can move on to what to actually say to Y/N about your unmet needs and your fears of emotional and maybe physical abandonment.”

She went into each definition thoroughly as I sat with my hands resting on my knee, listening intently.

“I wouldn’t go that far. Abandonment? That sounds silly and almost too serious. I don’t know about that,” I said once she finished. 

With a sigh, Dr. Poulos shut her book and set it on the table between us. “Noah, we’ve been seeing each other a while now. It’s my personal observation you indeed have conditions hindering you from this. It’s why you’re having a difficult time communicating and allowing this new slate to happen without fear.” 

To be frank, I didn’t want to hear the entire gist. All it did was give me flashbacks of things I wasn’t comfortable dealing with. At least I thought I wasn’t prepared to handle it, I suppose I was now. I knew I needed to have a prosperous and healthy life, as well as one with Y/N. 

“Noah? Noah, are you listening?”

I blinked a few times. “No, I’m sorry, can you repeat what you said?” 

“Every satisfied emotional need breeds connection and deepens your bond. Therefore, every unmet need has the opposite effect. It breeds disconnection. This happens because when your needs aren’t consistently met, it produces anxiety in you, which leads to conflict, which, if not handled skillfully, breeds further disconnection, and on and on. The cycle is never-ending.”

She spoke so softly, so calmly while I sat there with my hands in my lap so desperately trying to get into what she was saying to me.

To be blunt? This was a-fucking-lot.

Dr. Poulos tucked a strand of hair that fell loose from her bun to behind her ear. “Noah, you and Y/N must erase any confusion or doubt surrounding your needs. Learn to powerfully communicate your needs using a simple yet powerful template, and overcome the two most common barriers to having your needs consistently met.”

She handed me a piece of paper to which I took it from her hands and began to skim over it while she kept talking. 

“I offer suggestions for what to say, but they are merely suggestions. The goal is that you speak from your heart and express your truth with love and gentleness. I have a worksheet for you, review it. Think about it, and see what you can come up with. Practice in the mirror.”

On the drive leaving therapy, I thought back to my entire session with Dr. Poulos. It all seemed so silly, so corny. It did. However, I had to put my ego aside to let myself take in the seriousness of what was in front of me. I didn’t want anything to destroy my future with Y/N, hell even me just as a man. I had to do this.  

To realize I’m not powerless and finally take charge of creating the loving dynamic that I for so long struggled to have and keep.

Maybe this week away in the house Bad Omens rented would help clear my mind and I could practice this worksheet she gave me; when I wasn’t busy recording the new record. 

Instead of going straight home, I had to make a quick stop at Y/N’s place. As I knocked on their apartment door, I waited not so patiently with excitement in my veins. Malcolm opened the door with Salem in his arms.

I clapped my hands while stepping inside. “There he is!” 

Chase snorted from the living room as I took Salem from Malcolm. “Clearly, Salem will be fine while we’re gone.” 

“Y/N isn’t getting him back so easy, I hope she knows that,” I scratched Salem between his eyes; his favorite spot. 

“Oh, by the way,” Malcolm started while handing me the bag of Salem’s things. “I know you guys have a couple hour drive to your rental house but Salem hates the carrier. He’ll most likely move around the car before settling into someone’s lap.” 

“Have you guys thought about buying him a harness and leash?” I suggested. 

Chase sucked in a breath. “Do not tell Y/N that. She won’t even let Salem sit in front of an open window because she’s afraid he’ll jump out and run away.” 

“Speaking of Y/N,” I adjusted Salem in my arms. “Is she home?” 

“No, not yet. Do you want to stay and wait? See her before we leave?” Malcolm offered with a smile. 

I looked at my watch and internally cringed. The guys were waiting for me to get back from therapy before heading out towards our rental house a few hours away. 

“Shit, I would but I have to get back home. Plus, I don’t want to push her. I want this to happen naturally,” I said. 

Chase snorted, now standing next to Malcolm. “Yeah, okay.” 

“I’m serious,” I chuckled. 

“We know, dude. But, you could always-.” 

“I have to get back home,” I said, interrupting Malcolm. “But I’ll text Y/N later.” 

“Okay,” Chase says in a sing-song voice, belting out the last few words. “Whatever you say.” 

I cringed, covering Salem’s ears. “Wow, almost as good as me. Except, my ear drums are probably fucked now.” 

“Oh fuck you, Mr. Steve Perry meets Cher. I can sing,” he held his hands up. 

“No, you can’t, love” Malcom left a kiss on Chase’s cheek. 

He looked between us with a wild expression. “WOW! Taking his side!?” 

“Well!,” I adjusted Salem and the bag. “That’s my queue to leave.”

“Figures, thank you for taking care of your new cat,” Chase said.  

“My new cat?”

“Salem Sebastian L/N, that’s pretty much his name now,” Malcolm said while throwing his auburn-colored hair up into a messy bun.  

I hastily shook my head. “We haven’t even labeled it yet.” 

Chase and Malcolm shared a look before the former spoke. “Oh no, we’re not doing this again. You and Y/N are two peas in a pod, and I know how badly you both want to be in that pod.” 

“Especially with that new haircut,” Malcolm nodded towards my short hair. 

“Okay, I’m leaving,” I bid them goodbye with a nod and turned on my heels, stepping through the door. 

“Bye Salem’s dad! Talk to you later,” Chase called after me. 

On the drive back home, Salem was perched in my lap with his front paws resting on the door, his wondrous eyes taking in every sight I drove past. 

“You know,” my voice broke the silence. “I guess your uncle isn’t exactly wrong, Salem. I mean, I could be your dad. Do you want me to be your dad? I think you do.”

He then positioned himself so he could curl up in my lap, his soft purrs vibrating against me. 

NOAH

“Are you guys ok with steaks tonight?” Jolly asked from the kitchen. 

Matt, who sat next to me on the couch, nodded eagerly. “We’ve eaten like shit the last two days. A nice home-cooked meal sounds delicious, thanks, honey.” 

Jolly flipped him off with a smile before going back to getting things set up for dinner. 

Nicholas and Folio were talking amongst themselves on the couch next to the one I sat on, but the conversations fell on deaf ears as I continuously scrolled through my phone. The last two days, we’d been locked away in the rental house recording the new album and now, we were taking a much-needed break tonight, opting to grill out and have a bonfire; Jesse and Michael joined us earlier today. 

The guys and I have been talking about this for a while now and after the incident right before we left to come up to the mountains, it was time for us to put this idea into motion. 

Also, the picture I saw on Y/N’s Instagram story minutes before had me set in stone with my decision. 

“We need a bigger house,” I blurted, nearly scaring Salem as he slept between Matt and me. 

Jolly nearly dropped the raw steaks while Jesse turned towards me from his spot at the kitchen table. 

“That’s random,” Michael said slowly while pausing his mixing at the laptop station. 

I shrugged. “We’ve been thinking of moving anyway because of the notes on the car incident and now with that fan showing up on our doorstep, I think it’s about time we move. Too many people know where we live.” 

My three roommates shared a glance before Jesse spoke next. “I mean, we have been browsing Zillow lately. A few have come up that we liked.” 

Jolly agreed with a nod. “I’ll send an email to the realtor who was working with us before. See if she can get us set up with some tours.” 

“Tomorrow,” I said. 

“Kind of last minute, don’t you think?” Nicholas asked. 

“We’re going to be busy for the next few months. I’d rather get this shit done and over with.” 

Matt, who was scrolling through his phone next to me, snorted quietly. “I’d suggest looking for hardwood floors or tile.”

I turned toward him while narrowing my eyes. “What?” 

“For the paint spills, it’s easier to clean,” he said while showing me his phone; Y/N’s Instagram post up on the screen. “Look at your face! You’re totally turning turnip fucking red!

With a bashful smile, I scratched my chin. “No, I’m not.” 

“Noah and Y/N sitting in a large tree because of Noah’s height! K. I. S. S. I. N. G!”

I shoved Matt. “Fuck off.” 

Then I turned back to my roommates. “We need a bigger space with seven bedrooms.” 

Jolly quirked a brow. “Seven?” 

“Uh,” I ran my hands over my thighs. “Y/N wants a studio for her art, her paintings. I want to make sure she has one.” 

Michael smiled. “Well that certainly is a grand gesture isn’t it?” 

“It’s something I want to do, man,” I defended. 

“I know, Noah. We’ll find a bigger place, it’ll all work out,” he reassured me. 

“I hope so.”

Jolly paused prepping dinner to send an email to our realtor, Jackie, as we all spent the rest of the night searching for different houses that would be perfect. All the while, Folio’s phone conversation rested on my ears. 

“I know those Mexican candies are your favorite, Michelle. Why do you think I sent you them?” Folio chuckled with a wide smile. 

“Noah,  it’s almost ten!” Nicholas called from the deck outside. 

The patio door was open, letting in the cool night air, and I was helping Jolly clean up the mess from dinner. Salem sat on the counter, every so often licking up the leftover food from the plates I was washing. 

“Shit,” I cursed, quickly drying my hands, and pulled out my phone. 

However, before I could send the nightly text to Y/N, one from her appeared. 

Angel 🪽: I love you, mochi. 

Jolly peered over my shoulder. “Oh, that’s adorable.” 

I playfully stuck out my tongue at him. “Someone is nosy.” 

My fingers worked fast to text Y/N back. 

Me: I love you too, angel.

Part of me didn’t want to stop talking to her yet so while leaning against the counter, I scrolled through the videos folder on my phone, selecting the one I took earlier today. It was when we finished mastering The Grey and I was feeling great about how it came out, confident that Y/N would love it so I recorded Salem as he slept during it. Before recording another video of me singing it. 

I sent her the first video I took; the one of Salem lying on the couch while The Grey played in the background. 

Angel 🪽: Hi Salem baby! Mom misses you! Also, I hear something in the background. Is it..?

I decided to mess with her and not come out right and say it was that song. The one that she gave Jolly the lyrics to. The one she thought was too dark for herself. 

Me: He’s napping. He had a long day of playing outside. 

I laughed out loud, knowing that her brows were raised to her forehead with this text. 

Angel 🪽: You took him outside?

“Do you think Mom is upset with me?” I asked the cat, who simply didn’t bother to care what I was showing him; he wanted the leftover mashed potatoes from Matt’s plate. 

Me: Don’t worry, angel. We had him on a harness and leash. He loved laying in the sun on the back patio.

Angel 🪽: I trust you with him, Noah. But what’s that playing in the background of your video?

With my finger hovering over the other video I took, I contemplated sending it. Was it too much? Was it not enough? Would she figure it out? I mean, it was partially her words- meaningful, important. I just added to them. Both of us pulled out the dark from each other. Adding it shirtless, was just another decision- a good, good decision. I wanted her clenching and biting her lip. 

Not bothering to overthink it any longer, I hit send.

Me: I can’t wait for you to hear the final version.

NOAH

Mother fucker. 

Piece of shit. 

Douchebag. 

I paced the floor in the living room of the rental house, back and forth. I was so angry, the rage inside me was desperately trying to break through. Ever since I saw that video all over Twitter and Instagram, no amount of meditation and deep breathing could calm the burning anger. 

I should have hit him when I had the chance. 

Fucking Trey. 

“You’re doing the pacing thing again, Noah,” Nicholas sighed. 

I ran my fingers through my hair, one of the stands wrapped around my long finger, a hiss falling from my lips when I tugged on a knot. “Ow!” 

“Sit down! Stop pacing and stop tugging your damn hair! You’re giving me whiplash.” Matt demanded. 

“You saw the video, Matt!  It’s been all over Twitter and Instagram all fucking day. I can't even check Bad Omens socials without it showing up. You heard what Trey said to Y/N! He had no regard for her feelings, for any of them. He has no fucking business even being there to begin with.”

It seemed like last night after the Hollow Souls show, Trey managed to get backstage and confront Y/N, Chase, and Malcolm. No one was sure who recorded it but from how close the video was, my guess was one of the venue workers. Probably sold it to TMZ for a few extra bucks. 

“I’m aware, Noah. We’re all aware and so is half of Twitter. He’s an asshole and his dad should have pulled out,” Matt said. 

I snorted, halting my pacing only for a moment. “We should tweet that.” 

He chuckled, “You know I’m game.”

Jesse spoke next. “There’s nothing you can do, Noah. But based on her reaction, Y/N stood up for herself. She got the closure and told Trey to fuck off. You can’t control and fix everything. She handled it on her own.” 

I marveled at how much he sounded like Dr. Poulos. Always reminding me of what I can’t control. I knew I couldn’t control or fix anything but it still made me angry. 

“He still had no right to say things like that; not to her,” I fell onto the couch next to Michael, my leg immediately beginning to bounce. 

Bailey told Y/N a piece of her mind, followed by Trey. I could only imagine how broken she must have felt with the two in such a short amount of time. But Y/N was a strong woman. She held her head high and always took the high road. She defended herself and stood up for what she believed in, what she wanted out of life. 

For that, I will always admire her. 

Matt leaned against the pool stick in his hand, he and Jolly pausing their game of pool when I rushed down the steps to show them the video. 

“I get it. So many fucking people with their opinions and people who say shit just to say it; even that slimy fuck. But, think of how fucking cool Y/N is. She told him off and he's never going to come back from that. Trust me, everyone’s trashing him. I doubt he’ll ever be in a fuckin band again.” 

“You’re right,” I smiled proudly. 

He snorted, going back to the pool game. “I know I am, thank you.” 

Peering at the clock on the wall, I noticed it was only 7 in the evening, still a few hours until my nightly text with Y/N. Although I wanted to ask her about how she was feeling but knew that if it was something to worry about, Chase or Malcolm would have texted me. 

I was, however, shocked when I received a text from an unknown number; the message making me sit straighter up on the couch. Michael noticed the way my body went stiff for a brief moment and motioned to my phone. 

“Don’t tell me it’s another video.” 

“No,” I shook my head. “It’s a text; from Joe.” 

Folio’s head snapped up from petting Salem who was lying in his lap. “Joe Mulherin. The artist they’re touring with?” 

I nodded now. “Yeah.” 

Unknown: Hey Noah, this is Joe. I got your number from Chase and Malcolm. This is a little awkward but I wanted to introduce myself. I’ve actually listened to your band- you’re really talented! The acoustic version of If I’m There was killer, seriously.

“Oh, is he sweet-talking you?” Matt asked while peering over my shoulder as he knelt behind the couch. 

As I went about saving his number, another message from Joe came through. 

Joe Mulherin: I’m texting you because I’m sure you saw the video of what happened with Trey and Y/N. I will firstly say, she’s fucking awesome! And I’m honored to be on this tour with her and the guys. Incredible musicians and incredible people. Gearing back to the whole Trey situation, he showed up out of nowhere; but I feel it’s important to let you know, at least from my side, that Y/N kicked ass. She stood up for herself and I could see she felt a world of relief.

“What are you going to say?” Jesse asked while taking a bite from his apple, now sitting on the other side of me. 

“No fucking privacy,” I grumbled under my breath as I worked out a response. 

Me: Hey Joe, it’s Noah. I’ve heard a lot about you as well. Y/N has been a huge fan of yours for a long time. She was stoked about this tour, and yes she is awesome. Y/N’s special to a lot of us. She’s a genuine person and has a heart of gold; Chase and Malcolm as well. I appreciate your kind words. That means a lot. You know how it is- especially in this industry. And I did see the video, unfortunately. You were there?

Joe Mulherin: In case she needed support.

Running a hand over my jaw, I pushed away the feeling of regret for not being there for her. Y/N didn’t need me there with her all the time to fight her battles. She clearly could do it on her own. 

Me: Right, thank you for that. I hated what Trey said, I wish I could have stopped it myself but I also know how important it was for Y/N to have closure. I’m so fucking proud of her.

It was true. My heart was soaring in my chest with how proud I was of her. She needed this closure. Not enough to bring her back or get closer to him because Y/N knew she couldn't live through that again. 

Joe Mulherin: You should be proud. She’s awesome and she’s over the moon about you. From what I’m told you really lit a fire inside her, and that seems to be shining through. My partner did that for me when I found her and I’m sure it’s the same for you as well. So I just wanted to pass this along and formally introduce myself. I’m sure Y/N will bring this up to you but I wanted to show you how I saw it on my end. I hope we can meet soon.

Joe Mulherin: Oh, also. Hollow Souls new record is going to be sick. What they’ve been working on is sounding great.

With a bright smile, I leaned back onto the couch as I typed out my message. 

Me: For sure! Thank you so much. I wish I could be there. But, I understand it’s not the right time. I do hope soon we can chill at my place to shoot the shit. Thank you again for sending me a text. Very kind of you and I’m sure we’ll talk soon. I can’t wait to hear her new album. We’re all very stoked about it. We’re also close to releasing our record, I’d love for you to check it out! 

Joe Mulherin: Hell yes!

Matt hummed while patting my shoulder. “He seems like a cool dude.” 

I agreed with a nod as a sudden surge of inspiration hit me; so much so I sat up with a start. 

“Hey, Jolly. Can you open the file for Like a Villain? I have a verse I want to add real quick.” 

Nicholas responded. “Weren’t we worried that it might have been too long?” 

Cursing, I nodded when I remembered that we were running into that issue the other day when we were mixing Like a Villain. We were already over the five-minute mark but I needed to add this verse; it was important. 

“Let’s split it. Make the first half its own song,” I suggested when the idea struck me. 

My bandmates all shared a look before Folio nodded. “I like it. But we’d need a name for it.” 

I pursed my lips as I thought about the lyrics, humming them quietly. 

You couldn't wait, wait, wait for the day, day, day I lost. It's such a shame, shame, shame you couldn't change, look what it cost.

“What It Cost,” I said. 

Jolly smiled. “I like it. Why don’t you head in the booth and we can record the new lyrics.” 

As I set myself up in the booth, I muttered the new lyrics to myself a few times over, trying to figure out the best way to lay them out and what kind of cursive to use for it. The music picked up in my headphones and immediately moved to the beat. My fingers drummed against my thigh in beat with Folio’s drumming on the track. I let my eyes flutter shut, licking my lips, before belting out the fresh lyrics in the confines of the booth. 

The dark filled the room, any feelings I had earlier regarding Trey died down, and the shadows were lost. A fry of my larynx and siren-like soprano erupted from me.  Slowly the bravado went from soft almost alluring- “Go the fuck away, don’t come again.” 

To a bite so vicious and raw, the growls come from activated my soft palate, ribcage expanding and within my diaphragm spreading to my throat and out my mouth. 

“I’ll see your face in the fire” ribcage closed exhale alto “And burn it out.”

I added a deep growl to the word fire but didn’t like how it sounded. So with a twirl of my finger towards Jolly, we redid the take a few more times until it was perfect. 

This is confidence hard-won yet deep, anchored in the true self that is always safe at my core. I let it rip. If Y/N can close that chapter, so will I. From what I knew of him, what I remembered. What I’ve seen. 

Good fucking riddance.

Later that night in the comfort of my bed, I grasped my phone in my hand as my eyes drifted in and out of sleep. It was almost 10 pm and even though I was exhausted, ready for slumber to drag me to its dark depths, I needed to send this text; sleep be damned. 

Me: I love you, angel. I’m so proud of you. 

I didn’t say why but I didn’t have to. Y/N knew. 

Angel 🪽: I love you too, mochi. 🖤

NOAH

I shook my head with a disappointed sigh. “No, this house won’t work. It’s not big enough. “

Jackie looked around the living room we were all currently standing in; smaller than the one back at our house. 

“Why? It has enough space for the four of you. You’re all in music, right? There’s a room perfect in the basement for that.” 

Jolly sucked in a breath as I scrunched up my face. We want our studio to have light, and not feel as if we’re making music in a dungeon.

“We need four rooms for us and two extra. One for our studio. And the other would have to be bigger, better lighting,” I informed while stuffing my hands in the pockets of my jeans. 

This was the second house we’ve toured today; Jesse, Jolly, Michael, and myself. We took the day off of recording to do this, so to see yet another one fail, my mood souring pretty quickly. 

“What are you wanting it for?” Jackie wondered. 

“An art studio.”

She shifted on her feet while clutching her iPad to her chest; the one she used to look up the dimensions and notes of the houses. “Mr. Sebastian, we can keep looking if you’d like, however, you’re asking for a little much in this area. I don’t mean to pry or speak out of turn, but it sounds like you’re asking for a risky property. Are you sure you need something of that magnitude if it’s only a few of you living here?”

My eyes narrowed as Jesse let out a low whistle. “I was very clear about what I wanted. I personally don’t believe I need to discuss the details of why I need it.” 

“Of course, I apologize,” Jackie’s lips were pulled in a tight line. “It sounds like you’re asking for more out of pocket than what’s actually necessary.”

“With all due respect, don't tell me what you think is necessary. I want the home to be right, for all of us. And what I want and need is a space large enough for 2 studios and the master bedroom to be fully sufficient with space. The details don’t concern you. You either want our money or you don’t,” I finished with a shrug. 

“My apologies, we will keep looking.”

While Jackie went about looking for another listing on her iPad, I turned towards the guys; Michael giving me a reassuring smile. 

“Don’t stress too much about it, Noah. It’s only the second house.” 

“Y/N’s art studio has to be next to my room, with the perfect lighting and easy cleanup. I don’t want her feeling uneasy if paint gets everywhere,” I said. 

“Is this how you actually feel or is this your OCD talking?” Jesse wondered. 

I rubbed my jaw. “No, no it’s not just about that shit. She needs to be comfortable where she doesn’t feel the need to be careful. Y/N needs to be able to be carefree and safe. Here. With me.”

Jolly rested a hand on my shoulder. “It will be fine, I promise.” 

“I know,” I blew out a shaky breath. “I don’t want her to be unhappy here and give her a reason to walk out”. 

“Noah, she’s gonna love this so much. Y/N isn’t going to just walk away from this. Not this time,” Jesse reassured me. 

Feeling a little more at ease, I gave a slow nod. “Oh, we need a big window with a lot of light too. Salem loves to sunbathe.”

Michael snorted. “You say those three words and all of a sudden you become a cat dad.” 

Damn straight. 

With a plan to tour a few more houses in two days, we parted ways with Jackie and piled into Jolly’s car as he began the drive back to the rental house we were staying in the last week. Right before we arrived, however, my phone rang with a call from one of the reps at Sumerian. 

“Oh boy,” I muttered while answering the call, setting it on speaker. 

“Hey, guys! How’s it going? I see that you guys are busy recording. We love that!” Logan’s fake voice boasted through the phone. 

Jolly and I shared a look in the rearview mirror and I nodded. “Yep. We’ve been working nonstop.” 

“Well listen, we’re getting some push from the higher-ups, with everything going on and we know you guys have been working endlessly, the singles we’ve been approved to release are straight-up fire! However, we need something else. We need a hit. The radio push would be great for the band- exposure and all that. Think you can do it?” 

“Yes,” I forced out through gritted teeth. 

One thing I didn’t like was being told how to work and how to create my music. 

“Awesome!” Logan cheered. “We’ll talk soon!”

Once the call ended, I tossed my phone in my lap and ran my hands down my face. 

“Fuck, they’re pushing this radio shit. I don’t give a fuck about the radio, that’s not why we do this.” 

“I know,” Jolly nodded while he took the turn to the familiar street. “But business calls. This is the unfavorable side. The question is, how are we going to magically write a hit in this short amount of time? We planned on releasing the album in a few weeks.”

“It’s easy, writing a modern rock song isn’t hard, Jolly.” I shrugged. “We’ve seen how many of the greats have done it. I have one just in mind.” 

Jesse turned towards me from his spot in the passenger seat. “Are you going to pull out your Scott Stap voice?” 

I smirked. “Fuck, maybe I will. 

“You have to use that false bravado,” Michael smacked my arm. 

I knew I could do this, I wasn’t attempting to sound cocky but, like I said many of the greats knew how this went down. 

Business.

Business.

Fuck business 

I feel it right into my bones that I’ve got more than it takes to make this work. I began humming random sounds, my facial expressions twitching, the cogs just continuing to turn. I had the perfect sound. It all came to me like a gust of wind. 

When you resonate your mind with your soul, you will learn to live through a love that is so honest it is raw. There was another risk with a song like this; with writing like this. 

I needed to get it out of me.

NOAH

I sat outside on the deck of the rental house, the fresh morning air was crisp but fine enough to wear a sweater; the heat of the sun warmed the skin of my face. Salem lay stretched out on the warm wood of the deck, his black fur shining with the rays of the sun. 

“Don’t tell Mom I didn’t put your harness on,” I pointed to him 

I realized early on that Salem wouldn’t run, curious as he was, he always stayed by one of us. 

My laptop was set up on the table in front of me, the Zoom app idling as it waited for the incoming call. With the stress of trying to come up with a radio hit in less than a few weeks, my anxiety was running rampant. Even though I had the song all laid out in my mind, it still scared me to finally put it out in the air for everyone to hear. 

I texted Dr. Poulos if she had time for a few-minute chat, one she agreed with. Thankfully her prior appointment was also a Zoom meeting so she was able to hop right on another one with me. 

Jolly appeared in the doorway leading outside, donning his leather jacket. The wind blew through the long strands of his hair as he nodded towards me. 

“I’m heading to that newish coffee shop nearby. Did you want anything?” He asked. 

“I could go for something,” I nodded while taking off the hood of my yellow sweater. 

After I gave him my order, I noticed the way the corner of his lips curled before he turned to walk away. 

“Try not to fall in love!” I called after him with a laugh. 

Jolly froze and then looked over his shoulder. “Wh-what?” 

“The coffee,” I smirked. “Try not to fall in love with it. I’m all open to something new but we like our usual.”

“Oh,” he ran a hand through his hair. “Right.” 

With Jolly gone, my computer lit up with a new call from Dr.Poulos and I answered it with a faint smile. 

“Good afternoon, Noah. How’s it going in the mountains?” She smiled wide at me.

“Uh, really great actually. We always like to find some kind of solace when we either write or record; it helps us mentally,” I answered while moving the screen to show her the mountains behind me. 

“That’s wonderful to hear! Now, you mentioned something about your record label pushing for a radio hit?” Dr. Poulos adjusted her glasses. 

I ran a hand through my hair while nodding. “Yeah. I have no problem with that; writing it. It’s been inside of me for a while now.  I just don’t know what to call it. I keep putting that part off, pretending it’s already completed so it’ll name itself.” 

“Can I be frank with you?” 

“Of course,” I nodded. 

Dr. Poulos took off her glasses and steepled her hands together underneath her chin. “What do you feel like you’ve been doing, Noah? You’ve mentioned the word pretend on and off for a while in our sessions. Is that what you’re doing? Pretending things are going well when internally you’re struggling to accept the status you’re at with y/n?”

 My eyes snapped up from my keyboard to the screen. “What was that?” 

“Pretending? Are you just pretending?” 

Suddenly, it was as if I’d been hit with a metal baseball bat to the knee, knocking me to the ground below. 

Something Y/N told me that night of the party. “I’m so tired of you pretending that you don’t have feelings for me.” 

Just Pretend. 

That’s all I ever do.

Dr. Poulos spoke again. “You said your label is pressuring you to write a hit. Have you given any thought about if that pressure and the pressure of wanting to be with Y/N romantically is almost conjoined?”

I pursed my lips while leaning back into my chair, giving this question a deep analysis; although the answer came to me almost instantly. 

Yes. 

NOAH

With a yawn, I held the steaming cup from the cafe in town as Salem and I walked out to the front porch, both of us opting to sit on the swinging chair this time. We had two days left in the rental house and I wanted to take full advantage of the peace that was held in the mountains. 

Something that maybe in a few years, I’d look for with Y/N. 

“Alright bud, ready to watch Mom’s interview?” I asked Salem as he got comfortable on my lap. 

He purred loudly in my lap as I pulled up the live stream from the podcast that was interviewing not only Y/N but Joe as well. He was finishing up his performance of one of his songs and when the camera panned over to Y/N, who was smiling as she watched, my heart soared. She looked fucking breathtaking and my soul yearned to have her close to me again. 

Soon. 

“Mom looks beautiful,” I whispered to Salem, who didn’t bother to wake from his nap. 

“That was phenomenal. We appreciate you being here with us.” 

I didn’t miss how the interviewer kept his attention on Joe, not bothering to give praise to Y/N. With a scowl, I kept the video up while opening my text messages, and clicking on her contact. I got a glimpse of her phone in her lap so I knew eventually she would see the message. 

Me: You look phenomenal, angel.

As I watched, I took a sip of my coffee, humming at the rich taste. I had to admit that this new coffee shop knew how to make a drink. 

“Everyone online is begging me to ask you two this but what’s the dating situation? There’s so much chemistry between the two of you in the behind-the-scenes clips you guys post on Instagram. Everyone wants to know; are you two dating?”

I rolled my eyes with a groan, knowing that this question was bound to be asked. It’s always a common thing any time two artists of the opposite sex tour together. People see the great chemistry between them and automatically think they’re fucking. Now, I did see the videos on Hollow Souls Instagram account but to me, it looked like a group of friends having fun while on tour; harmless fun. 

I trusted Y/N. She knew that. 

Y/N crossed her legs. “Just because a male and female artist tour together, doesn't mean they’re dating.”

A flood of endorphins rushed through me. The interview was important, but I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful and fucking sexy Y/N looked. A few moments in my imagination and I’m released from the troubles of the upper brain, wanting so badly to be happy with her in a space where pleasure is king, and I couldn’t wait to stick my head between the legs of my queen.

“Fuckin tell him, angel,” I said while working out a new text to her. 

Me: Tell him who’s boss, angel. You know who you belong to.

“See? Your mom is cool. Salem you should be watching this. No? Naps are important. I feel you,” I chuckled while scratching his head. 

I felt a surge of pride in my chest when Y/N continued to stand up to the interviewer, not taking his shit questions.  

“Video surfaced online that Trey was at the show a few nights ago and it looked like the two of you were having an intense conversation. Is there a chance he’s joining Hollow Souls again?”

My lips pulled in a low scowl as I saw a flash of pain behind Y/N’s eyes when she forced a smile before leaning forward with narrowed eyes. 

“Here’s what we’re not going to do; we’re not gonna focus on my love life, or personal life. I make art, not headlines. I’m cool because I'm me, and my band is cool. The art is what’s the focus, not anything else. I do feel as if people need to understand that having a private life is my right. I don’t feel comfortable sharing every aspect. Like I said, I make art, not headlines.”

The interviewer tried to joke. “That’s a bold statement to make. It comes with the whole fame territory.”

“I refuse to allow this time in my life to be touched, tainted, or bastardized by anyone,” Y/N finished while crossing her arms over her chest.

All the heat rushed straight to my dick with the image of Y/N bossing me around like that so I sent her another text. 

Me: Fuck I love when you put douchebags in their place. You’re so sexy, angel. Fuck. I’m going to think about you bossing me around all night.

I knew I succeeded when I noticed a red hue cross her cheeks and Y/N squeezed her legs together as she read my text.

As the interview continued, I began to sing lyrics that came out of nowhere. “I know the pain that you hide behind the smile on your face and not a day goes by where I don’t think I feel the same.”

Y/N’s soft voice brought my attention back to the interview. 

“I’m becoming a very private person as of late so I don’t need to go into the personal aspects of my life. Just know I’m moving past things, and I’m very content. Dare I say happy with where the future will be.”

The interviewer nodded. “Fair enough. Would you say you’re hopeful for what the future will bring?” 

With a bright smile, Y/N looked directly at the camera, her eyes staring directly into my soul, and winked. 

“Oh yes, more than hopeful.”

Once the interview ended, I locked my phone and began to swing on the chair, every so often petting Salem. The sun was hiding behind an array of dark clouds, a storm was approaching; the perfect kind of weather to cuddle inside with the ones you love. 

Or write a radio hit.

“I can wait for you at the bottom,” I hummed. “I can stay away if you want me to.” 

Salem woke and looked up at me with bright green eyes. 

“I can wait for years if I gotta, heaven knows I ain’t getting over you,” I hummed, this time louder. 

My eyes bulged as I picked up Salem and ran back inside to where Jolly and Matt were lounging on the couch. 

“They want their radio hit? Well, I’m going to fucking give it to them!” I smiled widely as they looked up at me. 

Hours later after the song was written, all of us hung out in the living room of the rental house; Jesse and Michael playing pool, Folio on the phone with his girlfriend, Nicholas and Jolly working on the music for the new song. Matt and I were sitting on the couch together watching a movie, Salem perched on the back of the couch, resting his head on Matt’s shoulder. 

Noticing it was nearing 10 p.m., I pulled out my phone to text Y/N only to realize she texted me already with four pictures attached. 

Angel 🪽: You were bold to text me earlier like that, mochi, I could barely contain myself. Here’s a little payback. Hope you’re all flustered and bothered, whatever you’re doing I suppose will have to wait. Dream of me. I love you.

Clicking on the first picture, I nearly dropped my phone in my lap when the bright red lingerie graced my eyes. 

Holy shit. 

Y/N seemed to be in the bathroom of her tour bus as she posed in different positions showcasing the red lace teddy that hugged every inch of her marvelously. The color red did absolute wonders for her skin and I licked my lips, wanting to taste the valley between her breasts down her stomach to the sweet mound between her legs. The floral tattoo on her arm looked gorgeous as she held the phone out wide for the picture. 

Tilting my phone away from prying eyes, I quickly sent four texts in a row to Y/N. 

Me: Matt’s right next to me, angel. What if he saw this?

Me: fuck, my dick is throbbing right now but I can’t do shit about it. Consider this my karma.

Me: I can’t stop staring at the pictures. Fuck, you’re gorgeous. Beautiful. A true definition of an angel. 

Me: I’m going to call you in a little bit. I need to hear your voice. I need it.

My cock was aching in my joggers and I tried so hard not to make it noticeable as I shifted in my seat. 

Matt peered over at me with a raised brow. “You good?” 

I coughed. “Yep. I’m going to head to bed.” 

All but jumping from the couch, I made my way upstairs towards my room but Jesse’s voice stopped me. 

“You’re not bringing Salem? He always sleeps with you.” 

Running a hand over my jaw. “I’m going to take a shower first then I’ll grab him.” 

“Right after you look at those pictures Y/N’s sent you again,” Matt teased, not bothering to take his eyes off the television. 

A low growl came from my throat as I pointed to him. “You didn’t see shit.” 

He raised his hands in the air. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about.” 

Bidding them goodnight with a nod, I took the stairs two at a time and then locked the door to my room. My skin felt a blaze, those images burned in my brain, and my cock was almost standing straight out as I peered down at it; a tent in my joggers. 

Y/N texted me and I let out a shuddering breath as I read it, trying to compose myself for a minute. 

Angel 🪽: I’m going to bed early tonight. Maybe we can talk on the phone tomorrow. I love you.

Even in my aroused state, my heart yearned for the one that held it and my soul in her hands. 

Me: Fuck, I love you too angel. So fucking much.

Quickly shedding myself from my clothes I then positioned myself on the bed, my hair falling into waves against the pillow as I planted my feet on the edge of the mattress. My knees were up and spread wide as my cock stood straight up, little beads of precum oozing from the small slit. I took a finger and swirled it all around the sensitive part of my head. 

“Fuck,” my hips bucked with the high amount of sensitivity. 

My room was eerily quiet, too quiet for what I was about to do, so I turned on some music; more specifically Eyelids by Hollow Souls. 

If she couldn’t be here with me physically, I needed to hear her angelic voice somehow. 

I glanced at the pictures on my phone again, focusing on the one of Y/N sitting on the bathroom counter, her legs spread wide showcasing her sweet pussy that was barely covered behind the red lace, and her perfect tits were almost falling out at the top of the lingerie set. The sinister smirk on his lips told me she knew what I was going to do the second I was alone. 

I was fucking obsessed with how that teddy looked on her; her knowing what the color red did to me. It was so sexy, all I wanted to do was take it off with my teeth. I imagined Y/N as she rode me while wearing this teddy and she shoved the panties in my mouth when I would moan too loud. 

“Oh god,” I groaned while gripping my cock tight after pulling on the skin. 

Her voice sang sweet words to me but all I could imagine was her leaning over me to drag her lips across my throat. 

“You’re being too loud, Noah. We can’t risk the others hearing you.” 

I could almost taste those panties soaked with her arousal and I halted my stroking for a second. 

“Fuck! I have to improvise,” I leaned over the bed to rummage through my suitcase to find a thin sock.  

I hesitated for a brief second. “Shit, am I really doing this just to help get me off?” 

The image was still clear in my mind, Y/N riding my cock with her panties shoved in my mouth. 

“Fuck it,” I stuffed the sock in my mouth and began stroking my cock faster this time. 

I knew I wouldn’t last long, my orgasm burning low at the base of my spine and my stomach muscles contracted as I spread my knees wider apart. I lifted my hips off the bed when the grip around my cock was almost bruising, needing the slight pain to push me closer to release. One hand around my cock, the other holding my phone with the picture of Y/N, I supported my moans into the sock. 

If I was being honest, Eros took hold of me. I couldn’t wait to be able to actually fuck Y/N again. I’d make love to her every night, no question. This evening, carnality took flight. I wanted to leave her shaking, crying, and clawing at my chest. Begging me to never stop.

“Oh gods, angel. I can’t wait to feel you again,” I moaned into the sock as I nearly dropped my phone when my orgasm was so close. 

My grip was tighter and pace faster when I laid my legs straight out now, ready for pure euphoric bliss to drown me in waves. 

I was completely blissed out and exhausted, but I needed this release. I tried harder to hold the phone up eventually losing grip of it as it clattered to the floor. With my free hand, I now grasped at the blanket beneath me when my orgasm finally ripped through me. Warm cum shot out on my hand and stomach as I rode out the aftershocks with muffled screams, the song ending right as I finished. 

“That’s so good, Noah. So good for me,” Y/N’s soft voice cooed in my ear. 

As I came down from my high, one thing was clear. I wanted Y/N  imprinted in my mind as vividly as possible, not that her silhouette wasn’t always there already. I could feel my tongue involuntarily move in a wiper direction. Naturally envision grazing her insides with my warm, wet tongue.

NOAH

Folio came bounding down the stairs with a happy smile on his face. I raised a brow to him as I sat on the couch, strumming a few notes on the guitar. 

“Where are you headed?” I asked. 

“I’ve got a date with Michelle tonight. We’re going to Wingstop then head to the drive-in. It’s showing her favorite Cillian Murphy movie,” he answered while slipping into his leather vest.

“Taking the bike out?” Jolly asked from his spot at the computer as he paused mixing our current track. 

“We’re going to have a picnic at the drive-in; there’s a nice area designated for this. Michelle has no idea. I’m planning on surprising her after she gets out of class by picking her up.” 

“Good for you, man. I’m really happy that things are going so well for you,” Nicholas smiled. 

“You guys don’t need me tonight, right?” He asked. 

I shook my head with a smile. “No, go enjoy your night. We can't do much drum tracking here anyway. Tell Michelle we say hey.” 

“WEAR A CONDOM!” Matt, who was sitting on the floor playing with Salem and his new batch of toys, yelled just before the door shut behind Folio. 

While Jesse and Michael played a game of pool, I shifted my attention to the notebook on the coffee table. Tonight we had plans to record our new song but nerves were eating away at my insides. To become so raw and vulnerable in front of everyone as I poured my heart and soul out into the song gave me a bit of pause. 

“You know what’s wild?” I asked suddenly. 

“What’s that?” Jolly questioned while turning around in his chair. 

“It’s crazy how everything always comes full circle, I guess. With our last record, I said, “writing songs instead of letters, 'cause I’m too afraid.” 

“Have you written actual letters?” Matt questioned while lying on the floor with Salem, his head resting in the new bed I bought Salem. 

“Sort of,” I shrugged while tapping the pen against my notebook. “More like entries to Y/N, I guess. I can’t write fucking letters to her knowing that there’s a chance they’d get lost and she’d never get them.” 

I sighed while running a hand down my face. “The only way I know how to express how I feel is through music. I have these lines I keep repeating over and over; things I've said, things I haven't. I just need to make sure that when Y/N hears this song she knows how I truly feel.” 

“Here we thought you were writing this song out of spite to the label, or poke fun at radio hits,” Jolly jokes. 

“I don’t know what that means. They wanted a fucking hit so we’re going to give it to them. 

Nicholas rubbed my shoulder. “She knows, Noah. You two say I love you every night.” 

“I know but I need her to know how I feel deep down. How sorry I am for how everything went down the last few months. The fighting, Bailey, and not being who she needed when she needed me.” 

The guilt about Bailey still lingered. The way Y/N’s face looked so broken when she found out about me sleeping with Bailey. I have a lot of regrets in my life and that was one of them. Y/N and I are in a good place but I couldn’t help but worry that she still wasn’t over what happened. 

I couldn't risk any reason to have Y/N leave me again. 

“The both of you have grown since then. You’re where you’re supposed to be right now and soon, when Y/N hears this song, she’ll never leave,” Michael reassured me. 

Jesse agreed with a nod. “We’ve read the lyrics, Noah. It’s a great song.” 

“It's not hard to guess what the true meaning behind the song is. You’ve been subconsciously working on it off and on for months.”

“Jolly-.” 

He continued. “You both need to just make it official already. Your perfectionist nature and need to control everything is making this not so simple. You’re both so alike. You’re right there. You're saying I love you, call a spade a spade and ask her to be yours.” 

I stared down at the socks on my feet. “If Y/N shows up to the album release event maybe I can officially ask her then.” 

“Maybe?” Matt snorted. “What the hell do you mean, maybe? You’re looking for houses with an art studio and you’re saying maybe? Of course, she’ll be there.”

“You’ve done everything you’ve set your fucking mind to, Noah. Don’t let this be another thing you regret,” Nicholas said.

I wanted to let this song be the rock and holy anchor for her. Coming to terms from a healthier perspective. 

New beginnings. 

My vulnerability was laid out on paper. If anyone else needed to hear it it would be there for them. The message is there, you’d just have to find it. 

The way travelers seek the stars at night.

With a deep breath, I tossed the notebook back onto the table, not needing it because I knew every single word of this song. So much so, I sang it in my sleep. 

“Give me five minutes, I need to do something first,” I called over my shoulder as I walked towards the bathroom of the rental house. 

Once inside, I pulled out my phone with a long sigh and worked out the long message. 

Me: Hi angel. I know it’s not 10 o’clock yet but I felt the need to text you a little sooner. Shit has been weighing on me. I want to apologize for what I put you through. The miscommunication, the mind games, the confusion, and Bailey. I should never have brought her into any of our lives.  It was a dark moment that I succumbed to and I’ll never forgive myself for using Bailey as a way to hurt you. It was never my intention. I was drunk the night I slept with her, not saying it’s an excuse, but it was a dark place in my life that I never want to go back to. 

Blowing out a shaky breath, I hit send before working out another message. 

Me: My apology is for not being better, for not getting here sooner, for not rescuing earlier or with greater strength; all I ask is that you forgive me for those transgressions. In those times I was doing the very best I could and loving you so very much all the time. I love you so much, Y/N. I’m hoping that with this, we’re starting clean. There’s been a lot of different phases of my life and I can’t be the best I can unless I make amends for everything wrong that happened between us. I love you.

As I waited for Y/N to reply, I sat on the counter in the bathroom and let my long legs dangle off, swinging with anticipation. I nearly dropped my phone when it buzzed in my hand. 

Angel 🪽: hi mochi. Well, first I’ll say thank you. Thank you for communicating with me and apologizing. With the weeks we’ve been apart since I’ve been working on myself too. I forgive you. I accepted that while it did hurt me, you made a mistake. I want us to let go of the negative emotions and painful parts of memories. 

For many years I had punished myself, feeling that if I forgave more fully then love would blossom; yet in truth, it had never been there at all. Things have changed. I want to be better too. 

Forgiveness brings the liberty to love again and to heal the heart, soul, and mind. Thank you again, mochi. I love you too. 

With a lighter heart full of so much love for Y/N, I hopped off the counter and nearly barreled through the door, clapping my hands loudly. 

“Alright, let's record this hit!” 

My heart was pounding as I stepped up to our makeshift booth, put on the headphones and shook out the nerves from my hands. Over time I learned how to shake the nerves from doing my vocal takes in front of others, and lose the embarrassment. 

With our first two records, I tried to emanate vocals from other artists because I wasn’t confident in myself as a vocalist. Now, I wanted Y/N and everyone else to see that this was me; this record was Noah Sebastian and Bad Omens. 

With Jolly and Matt's cue, I took a deep breath and started on the first verse. 

“I'm not afraid of the war you've come to wage against my sins. I'm not okay, but I can try my best to just pretend. So will you wait me out? Or will you drown me out? So will you wait me out or will you drown me out?” 

Y/N’s face flashed in my mind at that first meeting; our first day on tour when I stepped off of my bus. She looked absolutely breathtaking with her long blonde hair blowing with the gentle breeze. Her toned legs were accentuated by the boots she wore and the ink of her Greek Gods tattoo on full display. The way her lips parted as I stole the breath from her longs with our first of many stolen glances. 

I licked my lips, eyes fluttering shut as I let the first chorus rip through me with my cursive singing. “I can wait for you at the bottom. I can stay away if you want me to. I can wait for years if I gotta. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.”

I didn’t bother opening my eyes to see the other's reaction. I needed to stay in this place I found myself in; my soul screaming for Y/N’s. 

“I know the pain that you hide behind the smile on your face and not a day goes by where I don't think I feel the same. So will you wait me out? Or will you drown me out? So will you wait me out? Or will you drown me out?”

We sat on the beach together, all those months ago, and Y/N continued to try and hide herself from me. She wore the faintest of smiles as she blew out a shaky breath when I lifted her chin with a knuckle. 

"You shouldn't be with someone that drains your spirits. Drain the light from your soul, angel."

"It can't rain all the time."

“I can wait for you at the bottom. I can stay away if you want me to. I could wait for years if I gotta. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you. We'll try again. When we're not so different. We will make amends. 'Til then I'll just pretend,” my hand rested on the windows of the booth, nails digging into the glass as I continued to pour myself into this. 

“Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy? Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy?”

Y/N didn’t want to leave, I could see that in the way her movements slowed once she was dressed, almost as if she was buying time for me to say something that would change her mind. But she refused to meet my gaze.

"Angel, look at me. What's the matter?" I asked again.

"Nothing-," she began with a sigh.

"Then why won't you stay?"

I tried not to think back to the negative aspects of our night together. I always tried to remember the way her skin tasted or felt against mine. But every once in a while her face as she was seconds away from walking away from me came crashing into me without warning. 

“I can wait for you at the bottom. I can stay away if you want me to. I could wait for years if I gotta. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.” 

Still buried deep inside of Y/N, I rolled our bodies so now she was straddling me. Her hands sprawled over the tattoos that covered my chest and she leaned down to lick across the snake and apple on my neck. The noises I made, and my moans were so soft as Y/N’s hot tongue went up and down my neck. She grazed over my Adam's apple with her teeth and bit down. I shook underneath her and wrapped an arm around her back to bring her closer, burying my aching cock, deeper inside of her.

We felt the rush, the aching, burning blush. We surrendered to the touch. Y/N gave me a show. This was heaven in hiding.

I sucked in a large breath, ready for the crescendo of the song, and let every fucking feeling I have for my angel come out through me in a surge of passion and energy. 

“We'll try again. When we're not so different. We will make amends. 'Til then I'll just pretend,” I nearly fell back into the booth as a lone tear fell from my eyes, quickly wiping it away. 

Rain poured around us with the onslaught of the storm as Y/N pointed a firm finger at me. “You always just pretend that everything is fine when it’s not! Then you stand there and have the right to say I’m the pain in the ass? Fuck you, Noah! I’m so tired of you pretending that you don’t have feelings for me.”

With the last few lines of the song left, I envisioned the one memory that I remembered every morning when I woke and every night before I fell asleep; the same thought was always there at the end of it. 

I am worthy. 

“Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy? Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy?”

“You what?” I urged while taking a step towards her. 

Y/N wildly shook her head as her makeup ran down her face, staining her cheeks and neck in mascara. 

“I-I can’t.” Y/N pressed her palm into her forehead. 

“Yes, you can,” I licked my lips in anticipation. “Fuck, Y/N! YOU WHAT?!”

“I’m in love with you! Okay?! I fucking love you! 

I tossed the headphones off of me to let out a deep breath and center myself once again, coming back to reality; not before one final memory flashed in my mind. 

“Well, that’s what we do. We fight. You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you’re being a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99 percent of the time. I’m not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2-second rebound rate, then you’re back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing!”

By now, the rain was a torrential downpour, branches of the trees swaying widely in the wind as the sky cracked loudly with lightning and thunder; it shook both Y/N and I to our bones. 

“So what?” Y/N scoffed. “Why does it matter to you?”

“Because I fucking love you, angel!” I blurted out.

NICK R

Holy shit. 

I looked over towards Jolly, who also had a shocked expression on his face. We all just watched Noah pour his soul into a song, one that would typically take more than one vocal take to get right, but he was so confident in this song that he didn't stop once. 

As soon as Noah stepped out of the booth, Salem trotted over to him and was swiftly picked up in his arms. “Did you like that, Salem? Do you think it was good enough?” 

Matt snorted. For the record label, my ass.” 

Noah’s eyes narrowed at him as he plopped down on the couch next to me. “I still feel like something is missing.” 

Almost immediately as he sat, he nearly stumbled off of the couch as he reached for his phone on the table in front of him. 

“It’s not ten o'clock yet,” Michael teased. 

Noah flipped him off. “No, asshole. I need something from Bryan. There’s something I want to use from the video of our day at the pier. I want to bury Y/N’s voice in the track.” 

I turned towards him when Salem decided to sit in my lap now. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? Do you think she’ll notice?” 

“No. Because nobody is going to know what this record truly is or who it’s about. It’s not their business. I’ve got it all worked out in my head.” 

We could all see the bags under Noah’s eyes since he stayed up all night the previous night writing this song, making sure it was perfect. 

“You should also get some sleep. We can figure this out tomorrow,” Jolly suggested. 

Noah immediately shook his head. “No.” 

“Noah-,” Jesse started. 

“Let me fucking do this, guys. Please. I need this,” he almost begged, his voice quiet. 

Eventually, I nodded. “Alright. This is your song, man. If you want to do it, go for it.” 

He smiled while throwing his hair in a low bun and turned towards Matt, shaking his phone. “Bryan sent over the audio. Think you can mix it?” 

Matt held a hand to his chest and had a faux hurt expression. “Is my dear Noah doubting my mixing abilities?” 

As the two of them along with Jolly began working on mixing the audio to bury it in the track, I had my own agenda. Salem looked up at me with curious eyes as I began typing widely on my phone. 

“Your uncles better be cool with this idea because if not, I don’t know how else I’ll be able to pull it off,” I muttered to the cat. 

Me: This new song Noah just recorded is heavy. We need to plan something to finally get their asses in gear and stop the bullshit.

Chase: I’m down.

Malcolm: You don’t even have to ask me twice. What are we thinking?

While I worked out the plan with them, Michael spoke from his spot in the kitchen as he grabbed a round of drinks for all of us; non-alcoholic for Noah since he recently started his sober journey. 

“Does this masterpiece have a name?”  

Noah leaned back in his chair, hands resting behind his head, and smiled wide. “Just pretend.” 

I raised a brow. “Just pretend?” 

“Yeah,” he nodded, cuddling the blanket closer to his chest that he had wrapped around himself. 

“I love it,” Jolly admitted. “It’s perfect.” 

Noah smiled, bumping fists with him. “Thank you, I think so too.”

NOAH

I stood in the middle of the large bedroom, mind running a mile a minute as I envisioned how the space would look. Jolly, Jesse, and Michael stood behind me as we all decided together that this place was perfect. It was our new home. 

“So, we’ve been thinking,” Jolly started as he walked around to face me. 

My brows furrowed. “Do you guys not like this house? I know it is a bit out of our price range but it’s worth it, I think. It has enough bedrooms for all of us and the two studios.” 

Jesse chuckled. “You’re rambling.” 

“Sorry,” I breathed while scratching my cheek. “I’m just nervous that this might be too good to be true. This place is perfect and if we don’t get it, I don't know how long it will be until the next one comes up; if it does.” 

“Stop thinking of all the negatives and for once, think of all the positives. Like how you get the master suite.” 

I snapped my head towards Michael. “What?” 

The three of them nodded and Jolly spoke again. “It’s only fair, Noah. The three of us don’t need this big of a bedroom and knowing that Y/N will be over a lot, it’s only fair the two of you get as much privacy as you can get.” 

“Also helps that this room is on the main floor while ours are upstairs,” Michael joked. 

I playfully pushed him. “Thank you guys. I love the optimism but we don’t even know if our offer was accepted.” 

We’d been back home for the last few days, finally finishing recording the new album, and while touring a couple more houses, we fell in love with the one we were currently standing in and immediately put in an offer. 

Enough bedrooms, a large window in the living room for Salem to lay in front of, a decent-sized backyard with a jacuzzi, and the art studio that was right next to the master suite. It had a large window that showcased the small creek that ran along the side of the house. And hardwood floors throughout the entire house.

Not to mention, the privacy of the neighborhood was a huge bonus. 

A soft knock sounded on the door of the empty master bedroom and we all turned toward Jackie who had a wide smile on her face. 

“Great news! The sellers accepted your offer. Now while we do have to wait for the bank to accept the sale, I want you guys to remain optimistic. Typically this kind of thing takes a while so I don’t want you to stress out.” 

Jolly gave me a sideway glance, one that I ignored. I was too fucking over the moon with excitement. Our offer was accepted and we were one step closer to finishing this part of our new phase. 

Three weeks later, we closed on the house and were moving in with hopeful hearts. The guys stayed true to their words and allowed me to take the master suite, which currently seemed bare with my desk and computer setup, and the long table on the opposite wall as it peered out to the window, the flowing creek the only thing Y/N would see whenever she sat there. I decided that a new bedroom called for a new bed; a bigger one. It would be delivered in a few days along with a few other things I ordered. I bothered Chase and Malcolm with ideas for days. 

Me: Do you guys think this table will be big enough? 

I sent a link to yet another vanity I found online. 

Chase: Noah, this is the 4th vanity table you’ve shown us. 

Me: And?

Malcolm, dude you have to relax. It’s perfect. Way better than the small suitcase she uses to hold every one of her products now. 

Me: well with me, she’ll never have to. 

Later on that day, I received another text from Chase. 

Chase: Noah, beware of paint all over the carpet.

I snorted as I typed out my response. 

Me: Already taken care of.

Chase: Good. Because even though I love her to the ends of the earth, paint is a fucking bitch to clean.

Me: Here’s the address. I would love it if you and Malcolm come check it out. 

Chase: Definitely. Let's plan for Friday?

Jesse and Michael gave me shit any chance they could get about obsessing over a vanity table. 

“Y/N does her own makeup. No one else does it for her so I need a spot for all of it.” I said while we browsed Ikea the other day. 

Michael tossed a new blanket into the cart I’d been pushing. “Damn, you really got it all figured out. I never thought I’d hear you ever say you need space for a vanity.” 

“That was before I ever cared. I just wanna make sure she has her own space. That’s all,” I defended while setting a cat tree into the cart. 

Jessed raised a brow, one I shrugged at. “Salem needs one for our place.” 

“I bet you cried your eyes out when you dropped it back off at Y/N’s place this morning.” 

Rolling my eyes, I ignored Micahel and continued down the long aisle of kitchen ware. 

“It’s going to all work out, Noah. This is a lot, especially when you’ve never done this before. I mean, we’ve been a fraternity for a long time if you think about it,” Jolly said. 

“Yeah, I know. But you guys know me, I’m in my head over the smallest things. This is a big deal. I don’t want to give her a reason to say no.” 

Jesse rubbed my shoulder. “She won't, Noah. It’s going to be awesome so don’t stress about this.” 

Letting out a deep breath, I set aside the screwdriver and paused building the new end table to run my palms over my white star shorts. I’ve talked to everyone in my life about this but neither of them gave me peace of mind the way I needed. 

Clearing my throat, I spoke out to the space in front of me. 

“Uh, hey Keaton,” I now rubbed the fresh tattoo on the sides of both of my hands, tracing each letter. “It’s been a while since we’ve had one of our talks but life has been a bit chaotic.” 

“We moved into a new house. Orie moved in with his girlfriend and we decided the rest of us needed a new place ourselves. A fresh start, if you will. A new phase for all of us.” 

I sniffled but kept the tears at bay. “Y/N and I are, well I don’t know what I would call us but we admitted our feelings for each other. We say I love you every night but the unknown of what we are still lingers and it fucking scares me to death not knowing if she’ll stay. I’m trying to do everything right to make sure she does. I can’t handle her walking out of my life again, Keaton.” 

Now running my hand through my hair, my bottom lip wavered. “I need a sign from you, man. I need to know that Y/N will stay. That all of this won’t be too much for her.” 

The eerie silence of the house was all I heard until seconds later, the Alexa device on my desk began playing a song; one I never expected but ended up smirking at. Memory Fiction by Erra echoed throughout my room and I shook my head with a laugh. 

“You would choose one of Jesse’s songs,” I wiped away a few stray tears. “Thanks, Keaton, I know we’ll talk soon.” 

I sat on the floor, letting Jesse’s words resonate deep within my bones. Y/N and I were reaching out towards the next phase of ourselves, autonomous from what connected us. 

When the song ended, the silence didn’t last long because there was a knock on my open bedroom door and when I hastily stood, I gave Chase and Malcolm a soft smile. 

“Hey, I’m glad you guys could make it,” I waved them inside. 

“Jesse just gave us the tour. It’s a nice place. I’m glad it worked out,” Chase said. 

I nodded. “Thanks. I wanted to make sure you guys gave me the okay. I don’t plan on rushing into things with Y/N. She can stay here as many nights as she wants. I just want to make sure she has a home here with her and Salem.” 

I motioned to the table. “Do you think this is big enough for all of her products? I want her to have space for it and all her skull nick-nacks and Valak Funko pop. She’d get that demon tattooed on her if she could”.

Chase agreed with a boisterous laugh. 

I pointed to another window that I placed another table in front of moments before they arrived; this one smaller than the vanity. 

“I thought that she could use this space for her plants. I know she’s obsessed with them. Honestly, she could turn our room into a fucking jungle for all I care. As long as she was here with me.” 

Malcolm had a hand over his heart. “Noah, this is great. Y/N loves you. You could have bought a studio apartment and she’d still make it a home.” 

I agreed with a slight curl of my lips. “Because she’d be there.” 

NOAH

I blew out a nervous breath as I stepped through the front door, clutching the bag tightly in my hand and when three sets of eyes landed on me, I halted in place. I was unsure of how they would react to this since I didn’t tell them where I was going when I left a few hours ago. 

Jesse was the first to speak with an approving nod. “Well hello, my friend.” 

“Don’t start,” I pointed a finger at him. 

Jolly stopped as he carried the high stack of towels, ready to put them away in the linen closet upstairs when he took in the sight of me. “Woah, I didn’t think you’d go through with it.” 

I rubbed the back of my neck. “I got tired of not seeing my neck. It was still suffocating.” 

“It’s different seeing you like this,” Michael said as he lounged on our new couch. 

The couch I spent years yearning for and imagining what it would look like.

“You think Y/N will still find me attractive like this?” I asked while shifting on my feet. 

Jesse's eyes widened. “Are you dumb?” 

“No, I’m just a little worried she won’t find this appealing. I mean, I love it. But you know, I don’t want her to be repulsed.”

“Noah, stop thinking that,” Jolly spoke. “Stop worrying, you look sharp and fierce.  It's a great look. And last I heard she gave herself a little makeover too.”

My eyes snapped up from the floor towards him. “She did?” 

“Yeah,” he smiled before heading up the stairs. 

I couldn't stop the smirk that spread to my face. “Damn, maybe we can be all mysterious and unveil at the release party. She’s going, right?”

“Nick said he texted her about it weeks ago. Y/N will be there,” Jesse patted my shoulder for reassurance. 

Now in the solace of my bedroom, I stood in front of the full-length mirror that was in the walk-in closet and admired how I looked. St. Patrick by Hollow Souls played from the Alexa speaker and I nodded my head along to it, amping me up on how the final look came together. 

“And I’m not spiritual but please stay. ‘Cause I think you’re a saint and I think you’re an angel,” I sang along quietly. 

I took a step back from the mirror but something felt wrong; off. I was missing something.

Opening the small drawer in front of me, I rummaged through the small variety of jewelry, knowing that once Y/N had her own pieces in here it would become filled until I found the two pieces I was looking for. 

The silver chain and bracelet shined under the light overhead and I ran a finger over it, remembering the day I gave Y/N her matching set. 

She opened the box as a gasp left her lips, the silver necklace and matching bracelet shone under the light of the room. It wasn't anything over the top and there were no diamonds but that didn't matter to her. She wasn't one for over-the-top jewelry, this simple chain and bracelet were enough.

With wet eyes, Y/N gazed up at me as I nervously fiddled with my rosary. "Do you like it?"

She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me into her embrace, burying her face into his neck. "I love it, Noah. Thank you so much."

With the bracelet and necklace now clasped onto my body, my look was complete. My fingers worked through the curtain-style bangs. The long fringe was paired with a middle part, a 3-guard short side.

“The Levi Ackerman haircut. I wonder if anybody will catch the reference. I’m a nerd,” I chuckled at myself in the mirror

Earlier,  I left the Harley Davidson shop with a new outlook; the oil-slick leather gloves in the bag. I was excited for the new era of myself and Bad Omens. I was ready for the new phase for what it was, what I’ve conjured in my mind. 

The power of visual aesthetics to convey emotions and enhance the overall experience of the music. The glove serves as a physical extension of my artistic vision, adding an element of mystique and intrigue to this persona I've created. Allowing me to create a distinct identity and connect with the audience on a deeper level.

I stared at myself in the mirror taking it all in. Completely engulfed in the Yohji Yamamoto coat and cargo pants. I spritzed Sauvage, opening the turtleneck I was wearing for the liquid to drip down my chest. It was snug in some areas, but all the same showed off the physicality of my dedication, as of recent. 

I look good.

I reached into the coat pocket for my phone eager to show Y/N but stopped myself from taking the photo. 

No, leave it as a surprise.

[tropetember]

Friends To Lovers - Two characters have been friends for years and value their friendship above everything. Unfortunately, they’ve both also secretly fallen in love with each other - but are both too scared to confess because it feels like a betrayal of their friendship.

Secret Identity - Characters A & B have secret alter egos- they’re both in love with the wrong identity.

Whump - A character is comforted/cared for in the aftermath of torture, but the mental wounds take longer to heal than the physical damage.

Coffee Shop/Restaurant AU - Character A is waiting for a blind date and is stood up. Character B is just finishing up their shift at the establishment and, seeing the looks that A is getting, offers to stay and eat with them despite their own exhaustion.

Famous AU - Character A meets Character B for the first time and recognizes their voice as A’s favourite podcaster/radio host/voice actor.

Teacher AU - Character A is a single parent and Character B is their child’s teacher.

Historical AU - The characters are living through a historical war (WWI, WWII, etc). Their main means of communication is through letter-writing. (Epistolary fic with optional in-person scenes between/after letters.)

Time Loop/Coma - Character A is in a coma and keeps reliving the last day before they lost consciousness. There’s something they have to realise before they can wake up.

5 + 1 - 5 times Character A’s kid calls Character B Mom/Dad + 1 time Character B acknowledges they’re their kid.

Drunk Dial - Character A is obsessed with Character B and gets black-out drunk to deal with it. Someone should definitely have taken away their phone.

Business Partners To Friends To Lovers - Character A and Character B meet by chance and, realising they have compatible skills, decide to embark on a business venture together. However, they are not prepared for all the ramifications that come with working alongside each other.

Touch Starvation - A character has spent years building up a tough, strong, untouchable persona. What happens when someone finally touches them gently? (Can be romantic or platonic.)

Slice Of Life - The story of two characters written through scenes only happening in one room of their house. (A number of scenes of domestic life happening in the same room of the house).

Human/Monster Romance - Character A is a human and Character B is a sapient sea creature, and a storm washes them both up and leaves them stranded on a tiny, remote, uninhabited island.

Dating App - Character A’s friends sign them up for a no-faces dating app. Reluctantly, Character A meets someone. Character B is a bit worried about them meeting strangers so they tell their own dating-app friend all about it.  (Or: the Bantr app fic)

Reunions - Two characters reunite many years after a traumatic parting, but new information is revealed that puts everything into a different light.

Love Confession - Character A has been in love with Character B for a long time, and they’ve been trying to confess ever since, but Character B is oblivious to their attempts (or doesn’t believe they are serious). This leads to Character A making increasingly more elaborate and even ridiculous plans to prove their feelings.

Mind Reading - Character A is involved in an incident and can suddenly hear the thoughts of people around them - but only when those people are thinking about Character A. That’s unfortunately bad news for Character B.

Disaster AU - Character(s) get trapped under a collapsing building and have to wait for help without knowing if it’s coming.

Horror - Characters A & B reunite, but slowly Character B realises that Character A’s body is being controlled by… something else.

Age Changes/Future Fic - Characters A & B are old together. Some things change but some things always stay the same.

Major Character Death (maybe!) - Character A is dead. Everything reminds Character B of them. (Character death doesn’t need to be permanent.)

Mythology - Character A is an immortal being/god and Character B is the only mortal who’s interacted with them in centuries.

Accidental Baby Acquisition - Character A rescues a baby/kid, and is then made responsible for the child. Character B is unprepared when they bring them home.

Not Actually Unrequited Love - Character A is trying to move on from Character B by setting B up on a date. Unfortunately, Character B takes this as confirmation that their own feelings for A are not returned.

Fake Dating - Character B pretends to be Character A’s partner so they can stay together while A is sick/injured. The charade goes on far longer than either of them expect. Finally being apart should be a relief, so why does it feel more like a real breakup?

Sexuality Crisis - A repressed character in a homophobic society finds themselves thrust into a city’s underground gay scene, where they meet someone they never expected.

Holidays - Character A’s family is expecting them to bring a date to the annual holiday family reunion. They choose to bring Character B (dating optional).

Regency Style Romance - ‘It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single person in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a spouse.’ (Feel free to change gender as needed.)

Optional:

Hanahaki Disease - Character A is not good at expressing their emotions - this time it might just kill them.

Cowboy/Wild West AU - Character A wants to leave the city. They answer to a newspaper ad for a spouse/farm hand to live on a remote homestead owned by Character B.

Free Space - write the wildest thing you can think of!

Link to main Prompt List

Link to Rules & FAQ

[jedineedlove]

Legend VS LMK

Nüwa

Legend:

Name:

Mother Goddes, and Member of the Three Sovereigns of Chinese Mythology. The sister and wife of Fuxi. Nuwa is considered the goddess of creation and the female emperor of mankind. Her reverential name is Wahuang (Chinese: 媧皇; lit. 'Empress Wa'). That is due to Nuwa’s position of honor in the Chinese pantheon, Nuwa was given a character completely unique to her name – Wa. Nu is the character of woman and is often used as a prefix for goddesses.

Shes is a godess in Chinese folk religion, Buddihsm, Confucianism and Taoism

She is one of the most venerated Chinese goddesses alongside Guanyin and Mazu.

Origin:

Nuwa was created by her mother, the goddess Huaxu. While wandering the heavenly realms, Huaxu stepped into the footprint of the god of thunder Leigong and suddenly became pregnant. In the earliest versions of the myth, Huaxu gave birth in the earthly realm to only Nuwa.

In later versions, Huaxu gave birth to Nuwa and Fuxi. Nuwa and Fuxi were born with the bodies of snakes and the faces of humans, however, they could shapeshift into humanoid figures with two legs and a tail.

Nüwa & Fuxi Appearances:

The iconography of Fuxi and Nüwa vary in physical appearance depending on the time period and regional differences. In tomb murals and iconography, Fuxi and Nüwa generally have snake-like bodies and human faces or heads.

Nüwa is often depicted holding a compass or multiple compasses, which were a symbol of a dome-like sky. She was also thought to be an embodiment of the stars and the sky or a star god.

Fuxi and Nüwa can be depicted as individual figures arranged as a symmetrical pair or they can be depicted in double figures with intertwined snake-like bodies. Their snake-like tails can also be depicted stretching out towards each other. This is similar to the representation of Rahu and Ketu in Indian astrology.

As some tales of Nüwa and Fuxi, both sprang from the same mother at the same time, Taoists believed that Nuwa was the primordial personification of yin energy (female, gentle, intuitive, and receptive) and Fuxi was representative of the yang (male, fast, active, fierce). Coming together symbolized the reunion of the yin and yang energies which then united to create human existence.

Fuxi and Nüwa can also appear individually on separate tomb bricks. They generally hold or embrace the sun or moon discs containing the images of a bird or a toad (sometimes a hare) which are the sun and moon symbolism respectively. Them holding the sun and the moon appear as early as the late Western Han dynasty.

Other physical appearance variations, such as lower snake-like body shape, depictions of legs. and wings with feathers that protrude from their backs as found in the late Western Han Xinan Tomb or smaller quills found on their shoulders, and in hats and hairstyles.

the Gansu murals dating to the Wei and Western Jin period, one of the most typical features of Fuxi is the "mountain-hat" which looks like a three-peaked cap while Nüwa is depicted wearing various hairstyles characteristic of Han women. Both deities dressed in wide-sleeved clothing, which reflects the typical Han clothing style also commonly depicted in Han dynasty art.

Nüwa and Fuxi Other Stories:

In one version of their myth, soon after the birth of Nuwa and Fuxi, a great flood struck the earth, and only Nuwa and Fuxi remained unharmed after escaping by boat. As the years passed, and with only each other to keep themselves company, Nuwa and Fuxi longed for companionship. Unwilling to violate the laws of heaven by sleeping together as brother and sister, they prayed together seeking a sign of approval.

As they were the only humanoids of their kind left upon the earth, the Emperor of Heaven accepted their union. After mating, Nuwa gave birth to humanity, becoming the matriarch of mankind by giving birth to a ball of meat. Nuwa and Fuxi then divided the meat into pieces shaped as humans and scattered them across the world.

In another version of the creation tale, found in the Classic of Mountains and Seas, Nuwa and Fuxi lived upon legendary Kunlun Mountain. Trying to keep warm on a cold night, the twins created two fires. As the fires burned, they eventually became one. While watching the fires merge, Nuwa and Fuxi joined together as husband and wife. Deciding that they would like to have children, they molded clay into the shape of humans. Using their powers to imbue the small figurines with life, Nuwa and Fuxi created humanity.

Duyi Zhi volume 3, written by LiRong over a thousand years ago, gives a slightly different account of the Chinese creation myth – “There was a brother and a sister living on the Kunlun Mountain, and there were no ordinary people at that time. The sister’s name was Nuwa. The brother and sister wished to become husband and wife but felt shy and guilty about this desire. So the brother took his younger sister to the top of the Kunlun Mountain and prayed: “If Heaven allows us to be man and wife, please let the smoke before us gather; if not, please let the smoke scatter.” The smoke before them gathered together. So Nuwa came to live with her elder brother. She made a fan with grass to hide her face. (The present custom of women covering their faces with fans originated from this story).”

"But most versions give sol credit of humanity's creation to Nuwa. But in some of those Fuxi is credited with introducing a number of innovations and inventions that made significant improvements to the lives of his wife’s beloved creations. One of these, for instance, is the invention of fishing and domesticating animals. "

Creation:

After the goddess Hauxu gave birth to Nuwa, Nuwa roamed the earth alone. The earth was young and teeming with life, filled with blossoming trees and flowers. The lush grounds were covered with many types of animals, the skies were filled with birds, and the seas were full of fish. But while the earth was beautiful, Nuwa felt very lonely, despairing that there was no one to accompany her.

While walking one day, Nuwa was struck by the idea of creating living beings herself. First, she made a new type of bird that could not fly away from her by creating chickens. Then she wanted to make an animal that would be a constant companion, and Nuwa created dogs. On the third day, she made sheep. Then pigs. Then cows. On day six, Nuwa made horses On day seven, while Nuwa walked along a riverbank, she stopped to admire her reflection. As she stroked the hair from her face, she was struck with inspiration and thought to make life forms that looked like her. Nuwa began to scoop and mold yellow clay into figures that had arms and could stand upright upon legs. As she worked the mud in her hands, the figures came alive and began to move and speak. Soon, the creations began to sing and dance around Nuwa while honoring her. All of the loneliness Nuwa had known went away.

Thrilled at her results and filled with passion for her creation, Nuwa desired to make more humans faster. She realized that she could drag rope across the mud and mass produce them, as creating every person individually was beginning to take too much time and hurting her hands. Soon she began to whip the rope, flinging mud and making people faster and faster.

The people Nuwa molded by hand became the wealthy nobility. The ones she made by dragging the rope became commoners. And finally, the ones Nuwa made by whipping the rope became the servant class. As she finished making the last batch of humans it began to rain. Because some of these figures had not yet dried, the rain began to mark them and melt them. The last batch of humans that Nuwa created were damaged by the rain, and thus were the ancestors of those with sickness and deformities.

"She molded humans individually by hand with yellow clay. In other stories where she fulfills this role, she only created nobles and/or the rich out of yellow soil. The stories vary on the other details about humanity's creation, but it was a tradition commonly believed in ancient China that she created commoners from brown mud."

The Pillars:

One of the enduring myths of Nuwa is that of the repairing of the Pillar of Heaven. In the early days of earth’s existence, The earth was separated from the sky by four large pillars which had once been the arms and legs of the creator god, Pangu.

During these early days, the god of water, Gong Gong, and the god of fire, Zhu Rong, had been at odds for many years. Unable to hold back their fury at one another, they engaged in battle to determine who would be the god of the heavens. As they fought, fires raged and floods began to destroy the new earth.

Gong Gong was finally subdued by Zhu Rong, but in his rage, he slammed his head against Buzhou Mountain, one of the four pillars of heaven that had once been Pangu’s leg. An earthquake shook the earth, and the pillar collapsed tearing a hole in the skies.

Looking upon the earth, Nuwa was filled with compassion for her children who were suffering. The new creation of earth had been torn to shreds from the battle between the water and fire gods. Fires burned out of control and water poured in a deluge from the hole in the sky. Nuwa desired to help her children, so she sought out the sky turtle, Ao.

Nuwa threw herself at Ao’s mercy, hoping for a miracle to save her many children. The sky turtle, feeling compassion for the mother of humanity, took Nuwa’s sword and cut off one of his legs, offering it as a substitute pillar. After leaving Ao, Nuwa collected five colored stones (red, yellow, blue, white, and black) and melted them together to repair the hole in the heavens, while using Ao’s leg to replace the pillar.

( The five-colored stones symbolize the five Chinese elements (wood, fire, earth, metal, and water)

Waters poured on her relentlessly as she pushed the leg into position, and once in place, she shoved the ashes of burnt reeds into the remaining holes to plug the leaks. After replacing the pillar and stopping the deluge, Nuwa fell exhausted upon the earth and died.

While many are familiar with the Chinese myth of the Three Sovereigns and Five Emperors, some areas of south China revere Nuwa as one of the Three Sovereigns, reigning as Empress Wa after the death of Fuxi and the rise of Shennong.

Tying into China’s strong ancient matriarchal beliefs, after the reign of Fuxi, the Empress Wa’s rule was challenged by a neighboring tribal chieftan. After defeating the chief in battle, Nuwa dragged her enemy to the peak of Mount Buzhou. Filled with shame, the chief banged his head upon the mountain, tearing a hole in the sky.

As the waters poured from the heavens, the entire world soon flooded, killing all of creation except for her army which was protected by her godhood. Nuwa then found five colored stones and melted them together, patching the hole in the sky.

In other versions of the Pillar of Heaven myth, when Nuwa attempted to fix the sky with the five melted stones she soon found that there was not enough to fix the hole in the sky. Knowing there was no other choice, Nuwa used her own body to fix the remaining hole, sacrificing her life to keep her children safe. With the hole repaired the deluge ended, and humanity was able to thrive and multiply again.

"In all of the myths of the repair of the Pillar of Heaven, due to Ao’s leg being slightly shorter than the original pillars, Nuwa could not align the sky and earth the same as they were before. The sky slanted to the northwest. The earth slanted southeast.

Since the repair, the sun, moon, and stars all rise from the east and set to the west, and all of the rivers in China flow southeast. And due to the use of the multi-colored stones, the clouds of heaven now had different colors."

Other:

In southwest China, many of the minority groups still celebrate Nuwa as their primary goddess and honor her with the yearly Water-Splashing Festival. There are many temples to Nuwa and Fuxi, but the largest temple to the pair lies in Hebei Province, believed to be the ancestral home of all humanity.

The Classic of Mountains and Seas, dated between the Warring States period and the Han dynasty, describes Nüwa's intestines as being scattered into ten spirits.

In Shuowen Jiezi (c. 58 – 147 AD), China's earliest dictionary, under the entry for Nüwa author Xu Shen describes her as being both the sister and the wife of Fuxi. Nüwa and Fuxi were pictured as having snake-like tails interlocked in an Eastern Han dynasty mural in the Wuliang Temple in Jiaxiang county, Shandong province.

In the collection Four Great Books of Song (c. 960 – 1279 AD), compiled by Li Fang and others, Volume 78 of the book Imperial Readings of the Taiping Era contains a chapter "Customs by Yingshao of the Han Dynasty" in which it is stated that there were no men when the sky and the earth were separated. Thus Nüwa used yellow clay to make people. But the clay was not strong enough so she put ropes into the clay to make the bodies erect. It is also said that she prayed to gods to let her be the goddess of marital affairs.

In Ming dynasty myths about the transition from the Shang dynasty to the Zhou dynasty, Nüwa made evil decisions that ultimately benefited China, such as sending a fox spirit to encourage the debauchery of King Zhou, which led to him being deposed. Other tales have her and Fuxi as exclusively the "great gentle protectors of humanity" unwilling to use subterfuge Another telling of that story is from the famed Ming Dynasty novel Fengshen Bang. Nüwa is revered since Xia dynasty for creating the five-colored stones to mend the heavens, which tilted after Gonggong toppled one of the heavenly pillars, Mount Buzhou. Shang Rong asked King Zhou of Shang to pay her a visit as a sign of deep respect. Upon seeing her statue, Zhou was completely overcome with lust at the sight of the beautiful ancient goddess Nüwa. He wrote an erotic poem on a neighboring wall and took his leave. When Nüwa later returned to her temple after visiting the Yellow Emperor, she saw the foulness of Zhou's words. In her anger, she swore that the Shang dynasty would end in payment for his offense. In her rage, Nüwa personally ascended to the palace in an attempt to kill the king, but was suddenly struck back by two large beams of red light. After Nüwa realized that King Zhou was already destined to rule the kingdom for twenty-six more years, Nüwa summoned her three subordinates—the Thousand-Year Vixen (later becoming Daji), the Jade Pipa, and the Nine-Headed Pheasant. With these words, Nüwa brought destined chaos to the Shang dynasty, "The luck Cheng Tang won six hundred years ago is dimming. I speak to you of a new mandate of heaven which sets the destiny for all. You three are to enter King Zhou's palace, where you are to bewitch him. Whatever you do, do not harm anyone else. If you do my bidding, and do it well, you will be permitted to reincarnate as human beings." With these words, Nüwa was never heard of again, but was still a major indirect factor towards the Shang dynasty's fall.

Nüwa and Fuxi were also thought to be gods of silk

LMK:

Long ago, Nüwa sculpted humanity out of clay and mud. She believed her children would not survive the primordial sea of chaos, so she built the Pillar of Heaven and forged the cycles to protect them. But, a cataclysmic event left the pillar shattered. Nüwa crafted five-colored stones and reconstructed the pillar back to its original state. She entrusted four stones to the Four Symbols: the Vermillion Bird, the Black Tortoise, the White Tiger, and the Teal Dragon, the final one to be guarded by the Jade Emperor. After Monkey King's birth, Nüwa repurposed his stone to carry the Harbinger of Chaos. She was saddened by the creature's existence to sacrifice himself but knew that this was a necessary sacrifice to keep her children safe from the chaos beyond.

Thoughts:

Throughout the whole research into her real-world mythology. She has been credited for creating a few animals though monkeys are not mentioned that could be just my research or something else. But I actually found something similar to her pillar story number 3 that nearly matches the LMK version of her fixing the pillars. She was never in the JTTW. But some other thoughts on Nuwa and the pillars I think when she fixed the pillars she accidentally made Wukong. I don't remember where I read this but I think there was a version of JTTW that had the Jade Emperor say something about " Made with the essence of fragments of Godess Nuwas Power" Even if that might not be what I remember right. Maybe it could be in the LMK universe when the crew fought the Nine-headed demon, he used his chaos powers to bind them to certain sections of the wall.

MK is placed over his mural self, the silhouette of his destiny. And the others are placed over the sotnes that would later be them when they smashed them.

But then look at Wukong who is placed in Nuwas hand in the mural of her molding and creating humans.

This could be foreshadowing that it might be revealed and it might hold something of importance later. It might also explain why the goddess chose Wukong as the templet for her harbinger of chaos.

Other Media:

She does appear in the film "The Monkey King: Havoc in Heaven's Palace" and "Journey to the West II", both of which feature Nüwa creating Sun Wukong using one of the five-colored stones. The former film also features Nüwa sacrificing herself to rebuild Heaven, similar to her actions previous to Season 5.

Thnak you for reading if you have something i missed please leave it in the comments thank you :)

[dontmixpaintinyourcoffee]

More Lodgers! I think Mosley is my favorite of this batch, both pose and design-wise. I'm drawing them in order of introduction, and it's almost like a cool little Easter egg hunt looking for different angles and full-body panels of characters that don't show up a ton.

(Edit! I updated the drawings, it not matching the other set was bothering me)

Thoughts under the cut again

Back at it again with the goggles and gloves! Except for Mr. Griffin which is interesting. Could be for lots of reasons, like pulling descriptions from The Invisible Man, or maybe his work doesn't require a lot of physical risk, or maybe they just didn't want all the Lodgers to feel too samey. He's still aligned with the Lodgers aesthetically through the apron, which Bird also wears. Neat! I'm very entertained by the different types of eyewear too. Some have goggles, some have binoculars, and some have layers of magnifiers like jeweler's glasses (of course I always think of the Toy Story 2 scene). I'm sure some of them have super specialized equipment too, like Maijabi probably has some sort of spectral filter lens or something.

God what I would give to pick Sage Cotugno's brain about some of these designs because I am fascinated by Mosley. They technically didn't have to go through and give each lodger such a strong sense of personality but I adore that they did! Mosley in particular reminds me of Mole from Atlantis, with the scarf and the multi-layered goggles and the digging. And Helsby wouldn't be out of place at the Benbow Inn! Know that I mean this as incredibly high praise, I could talk about the designs in Treasure Planet for days. Point is that both those movies have an incredibly strong visual identity, primarily through the character designs and architecture, and this comic feels the same way to me.

My personal favorite rogue scientist is next up! I love her design so much and I'm so excited to draw her. Also, how in the hell do you end up with "make spy bugs" as your job?? And where can I sign up?? Miss Flowers please

Mosley has my favorite pose but Griffin has my favorite face. Look at him. Grouchy bastard

I realize that I've been labeling all the Lodgers as "doctor" but it's entirely possible that some of them probably don't have doctorates. Y'know. The thing that makes you a doctor. Then again Frankenstein dropped out of college and we all call him "Dr" so I don't see why these fine people shouldn't get the same respect! Dunno if this applies to Victoria Frankenstein though. She's crazy enough to have also finished college while all the other shit was happening.

(yes I know that Frankenstein technically had all the knowledge and the expertise and was miles ahead of literally everybody else and only dropped out because he was busy proving that death is merely a temporary state and God means nothing in the face of human ingenuity and all that, but the bastard still didn't graduate and also he's an asshole so I'm gonna pick on him)

[orphiclovers]

Thoughts on yjh and body horror?

Hmm, some. I think Yoo Joonghyuk's whole deal is a lot more often about mental anguish as opposed to physical. Regression resets all his wounds and scars except the mental ones, so those are the ones that take a massive toll on him. 'Hell of Eternity' is hell because he can never escape his own memories. He is weak to mental attacks but his body is usually near indestructible.

Secretive Plotter's damage is the 'curse of immortality' and his only motivation is finding eternal rest, so that's all mental. Even outergodification is a mental process. Losing his appearence as a 'human' was a secondary side effect to losing his identity as 'Yoo Joonghyuk' and just asthetically speaking, turning into a shadow person isn't really 'body horror' to me, which I associate more with viscera and flesh, not cold and clean intangibility.

I'm not just bringing up SP because I have brain worms (also that) but because there is a specific regression that I think does exemplify 'body horror', and that's 999, baby!

Hear me out. I don't say this soley due to 999's lack of limbs, since there's nothing inherently horror about being an amputee (though removing his own eyes is a bit saw trap energy not going to lie) BUT because his was the one regression where his main problem wasn't mental - he had all his companions, was as happy as one could be in an apocalypse - but the fact that his physical body failed him. He didn't die in battle, but instead wasted away due to the 'outer world covenant'.

Kim Dokja might be self-sacrifical but this guy was on another level.

999 didn't hesitate to take hits for his companions, which is how he lost his limbs, and at the same time he borrowed an outer god's powers to win battles (I'm imaganing a chaos version of advent of a half-god) , which probably looked really epic, but unforunatley was at the expence of his soul. The covenant ate away at him piece by piece, and it's said his 'bloodstream went haywire until he couldn't walk or use his skills' (the translation was wonky here but you get it) which I take to mean he had some kind of cell damage, kind of like radiation or chemo.

This was a years long process, from when he first signed the Outer World Covenant up until the 99th scenario, and that whole time he kept borrowing those powers even though he saw it was killing him. What I mean is, it probably didn't look or feel great to see him falling apart, but the level of gore is reader's choice to imagine (anywhere from a tasteful coughing up blood and nosebleeds, to skin peeling off and hair falling out etc.).

Oh and since I know you would enjoy this, I'll say this too.

I don't think Secretive Plotter knew what he would do to 999.

He meant to save 999, not kill him.

This was almost assuredly his first Outer World Convenant, since I figure changing the 999th regression was the first thing he tried to do after he gained the ability to worldline hop/ had the tiniest bit of control over his outer god powers. He was still young and hopeful - 'foolish' as the Secrerive Plotter reminices. But he clearly fucked something up badly, maybe since he didn't have the clear grasp of probability manipulation that he developed in the next thousands of years or tried to directly change too much.

Canon era, he gives both KDJ and HSY a covenant just fine and they don't have any issues from it. (He's very careful to take the probability on himself - remember the finger thing?)

I wonder how horrified young SP was to see 999 destroying himself using SP as the method. Did he try to back out at some point, but couldn't due to the covenant? Did he try to make 999 stop, which he of course refused to do? I think about them a lot.

[velchronica]

pov. ♬~*.°₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ itoshi rin

i wanna love me the way that you love me

for all of my pretty and all of my ugly too

i’d love to see me from your point of view

or, itoshi rin loves you, infinitely, even when you’re struggling to find reasons why he should

content: insecurity (physical & emotional), hurt/comfort, pro footballer!rin, gn!reader, non-celeb!reader, established relationship, sfw

wc: 1.4k

rin always holds you close and let you cry into the crook of his neck when you need him the most, rubbing soothing circles onto your back, comforting and warm. he doesn’t complain about the tear stains on his shirt—instead, he stays there with you in his arms for hours on end. it’s as if there isn’t anything in the world that could move him until you’ve had enough of him.

rin is always understanding. he’s had his own depressive episodes—(often sae-related) symptoms of his unresolved abandonment issues, the fear of not being good enough. yet in those difficult moments, the one who’d worked through all of it with him had been you. so it’s only natural rin plays his part to repay you, to show gratitude for the fact you’re in his life.

life can be cruel, and the world can be cold. people can be both, even if they don’t mean to be. but rin is neither when it comes to you.

some days are better than others, and others may be worse than most. but no matter what’s led to your subsequent breakdown, rin doesn’t question it, he simply lets you cry it out. and if you’re willing to let go of him for a short moment, he’ll be back in no time after making some hot cocoa and getting your favourite sweet snacks, and he’ll carry you—clinging onto him like a baby koala—to your shared bedroom.

once you’re both comfortably sprawled across the bed with a variety of scrumptious delicacies on your bedside cabinet, you muster up the courage to speak up. rin is attentive: his eyes never leave you once while you rant, but his gaze never grows bored, nor does it show signs of it being childish indulgence or empty support. no, rin will sympathise, and never does less than his best to help you through it.

insecurity is not linear, nor is grief or worry. most of the time, there’s no trigger, nor is it a culmination of many miseries. it isn’t straightforward at all, not something that can be ‘fixed’. you’re not ‘broken’ for feeling that way. you’re human, that’s all there is to it.

to be honest, when you tell rin that you sometimes feel unworthy to be by his side, he doesn’t understand. “you’re the itoshi rin, and i’m, well, this,” you say, scoffing a little at the end.

he doesn’t get how you can undermine yourself like that, how you don’t see all the things—whether they’re as easy to spot as the sky above or a miniscule thing even you’re unaware of yourself—that make you so beautiful. to rin, you’re divine. heaven on earth is your feather-light touch, your smile when you look at him, your laughter whenever rin makes a sour face as if he’s just bitten into a lemon because someone’s annoyed him. heaven is every moment he spends with you.

somehow—god knows how—you don’t see that.

sometimes loving rin is all you know, but other times you know he’s so gorgeous that he catches the eye and captures the hearts of all who pass him by. in your eyes, you’re by no means special, but he is. rin’s beautiful in the way his brows furrow when he wakes up in the morning, thick, dark lashes fluttering like butterfly wings as they begrudgingly blink up. the world knows rin’s beautiful, too, because you see it under every post he makes on social media. you know the world loves rin (maybe just not as much as you do) when they scream his name as he walks onto the pitch. he’s like an idol, the way they treat him, with the name banners and the feral fans.

you don’t blame them. who can resist itoshi rin?

you don’t understand how rin can love you, when your ‘imperfections’ are all you can see when you look in the mirror. when you compare your body to that of the celebs that rin’s fans ship him with, or nonsense gossip magazines photoshop him with, because you can imagine rin with someone else—someone more beautiful, more talented. surely there’s a million other alternatives. surely someone as beautiful and special as rin deserves someone equally beautiful and special, someone who can match him, someone deserving.

“sometimes i think you deserve better than me. you’re too good for someone like me.”

when the truth you’d buried comes tumbling out your mouth one night, rin simply cannot comprehend how you could possibly think that. if anything, you’re the one who deserves better than him, right? you simply just settled for him, when you could’ve done much better.

“how could i ever want anyone who isn’t you?” rin says, gritting his teeth. “how can you say you’re undeserving?”

and he pulls you into the most devastating kiss, his hands roaming your beautiful body, every edge and every curve, warm and strong. your hands claw at his shoulders, grasping, and you’re breathless as rin’s lips leave yours momentarily, before they’re slamming back into yours once more.

“you’re beautiful,” rin confesses against your lips, before drawing back. something warm falls on your cheek. when your eyes refocus, rin’s crying. “i love everything about you. all that you are. i can’t explain it. i don’t need to pinpoint your best feature when everything about you is the best. you don’t need to be perfect. i don’t believe in that shit anymore. i just want you to be yourself. i want you to be proud of who you are, and i want you to be happy when you’re with me.”

you reach up to wipe rin’s tears away, feeling your own eyes sting with the telltale warning of your tears’ return. however, rin simply takes your hand in his own, and holds it against his cheek.

“i could spend the rest of my life telling you all the things i love about you, because i’d have to talk about everything about you,” rin says, and your breath hitches in your throat. your boyfriend is a man of few words, he’s always been a patient listener when it comes to you. confessing that he’s willing to talk about everything he loves about you for the rest of his life isn’t a small feat.

the day you broke down rin’s walls and entered his monochrome world, he began to believe in love again. and now he’s learned to simply love again, he’s not going to stop loving you.

and now you’re tearing up again. “i wish i could love myself as much as you love me,” you whisper. “there’s so much i hate about myself.” the words don’t roll off your tongue easily—they’re hesitant, reluctant, like a secret.

“then let me love you,” rin says. “i’ll love all the things you love about yourself and the things you hate about yourself. i’ll love you so much that you’ll learn to love the things you hate about yourself. i’ll remind you of how much i love everything you are, every day, whenever you need me, always.” his turquoise eyes are ablaze, and they look like blue-green flames, scorching with passion and love. “if you don’t want to face your fears alone, i’ll be with you. if you want time to yourself, i’ll wait for you. i’ll keep loving you, even when you’ve forgotten how to love yourself.”

when he pulls you close again, you rest your head against his torso, and you can hear the racing rhythm of his beating heart. in his arms, you feel warm, complete.

“i love you, rin. thank you. i think i really needed that today.”

rin exhales shakily, and you feel the vibration of his chest. “i love you. so damn much.” his hold of you tightens slightly, gentle but protective. “i love you because of who you are. if you decide to change for yourself, i’ll still love you. if you can’t love yourself, i love you for all the self-love you’re missing. and i’ll never stop loving you. don’t you dare forget that.”

© velchronica 2024

[lazyneonrabbitt]

Domesticated

Daryl Dixon x reader

Request. Cuddling in bed, like mundane little moments in their relationship

🏠 🌳 🐺

You laid in bed, cuddling your big, fluffy beast of a man. Propped up on your elbows that rested on his chest so you could press sweet kisses to his snout while the rough pads of his paws ran over the soft fat of your thighs and butt. You had just gotten out of the shower while Daryl had offered to warm the bed for when you got back.

Even with the winter being as cold as it was, you were,you were perfectly comfortable being in the nude underneath only the large deer pelt Daryl had gifted you as his courting gift that you had ever so excitingly accepted when the days started getting shorter, and with accepting the pelt you also accepted his offer of marriage.

Which was something you hadn't entirely realised as it happened.

You had been invited to come over for dinner and you had stayed with him in his basement room overnight and only kisses and cuddles were shared after he gave you the pelt.

When you came back upstairs the next morning Carol had embraced and congratulated you, asking if the newlyweds would like some breakfast.

Your little sign of shock had Daryl almost regret not being more forward about it until Carol enthousiastically spoke up about it and Daryl only sensed happiness and love coming from you.

"So, the pelt is like my wedding ring?" You three shared breakfast and talked. Carol snooped about your first night together and got disappointingly boring answers, and Daryl explained how werewolf relationships worked and tried to adapt them to you being a human together.

So here you sat at your back porch. A large sheet covering the white painted floofing as you held the squirel carcass with your bare hands and cut away at the skin with a grimace on your face.

Next to you your loving husband laid on the floor, rolled over on his back and laughing.

Well, as far as laughing went in his shifted form.

The first time he had you do this was a nightmare.

Daryl came home with a couple of hunted squirels, throwing them at you and letting you know he caught dinner and you were preparing it.

Sitting on the porch you watched in horror as Daryl showed you how to skin the little creature and prepare it for cooking.

When he handed you one you took it reluctantly, being way out of your comfort zone while Daryl laughed.

"Yer the one who mentioned havin' kids. I'm the one teachin' ya how to be a good werewolf momma before I even think of puttin' a pup in ya."

You complained all the way through the job, and Daryl helped you a lot those first few times.

Now as you were at the squirel business again he had shifted so he couldn't help you. Not physically but also not even verbally as he couldn't talk. You almost didn't want to feed him the squirel after you finished it.

Not that you'd need to take it apart for him, he'd swallow it whole.

"It's for the babies." You kept telling yourself as you almost cried when you stuffed your hands into its chest cavity to pull the innards out. "Gods, I can't believe you shove your entire head between a deer's ribs to eat. So gross.."

While it wasn't technically a complaint, Daryl still decided to fake offense and dramatically turn away from you, plopping down with his tail almost in your squirrel and loudly grumbling like you hurt his feelings.

"Just know that if you ever feed them whole squirels you're the one bathing them." You swat his tail away from the dead animal and slump back as you continue to reluctantly carve it up.

At least you had dinner prep almost done now.

Together with the potatoes coming in from Hilltop and the locally grown greens you managed to put together a decent meal for the two of you.

Like you agreed on you ate dinner together at the table, even if you had been spending all day at home. Dinner was one constant at home to both be normal people for a moment.

As you ate you felt eyes on you, knowing full well what that look was but you ignored it to the best of your ability and continues to eat.

Untill Daryl decided ro mumble a question with his mouth full. One you didn't quite make out and had you look up.

Right into his big, sad puppy eyes that looked down at the meat on your plate and back at you, pleading to trade.

There was a lot people didn't know about Daryl. One of those being his hidden talent for giving puppydog eyes that rivaled even little Jude and RJ's.

One quick glance was all it took for you to give in and trade some of his potatoes for your portion of meat.

A sigh leaves your smiling lips as he happily chows down on his dinner.

After Daryl washed the dishes that you dried and put away after, you decided to go for a shower.

He loved it when you washed his hair, scratching the collected dirt off his scalp and massaging fhe soap through his hair. If you didn't need to preserve water he could stay in there like this with you for the whole night.

When you were done he'd always return fhe favor. Washing your hair with the same care as you did for him.

One thing you did without fail was make sure to be out of the shower before Daryl had the water shut off.

As you stood on the ratty old bathmat you watched Daryl's figure as he shook the water off him like a wet dog, his long hair slinging waterdrops everywhere.

Your little after shower ritual was nowhere near as thorough as it was in the old world, but whemever Daryl brought back sealed bottles of lotion you'd make sure to treat your skin nicely while your hair sat wrapped in a towel and Daryl watched you while he air-dried on the edge of the tub.

You loved to watch him through the mirror, staring lovingly at your butt while you lathered yourself in lotion, and caked moisturizer on your face. After massaging it all in you went to towel dry your hair as you let the rest of you continue to air-dry.

Once you had your hair dried and brushed you moved over to brush Daryl's as well. Carefully plucking at the tangles and being relieved when you didn't find any knots you couldn't save and had to cut out.

Living alone in the house was a blessing, being able to walk around the upper floor in nothing but a towel without having to worry anyone would see you as Daryl snatched the towel off you to hang over the edge of the tub before joining you in bed.

It might have been early, but as long as he got to cuddle you he'd be in bed any hour of the day.

~~☆☆☆~~

A/N: So much fluffy goodness! Do you enjoy the fluff? Or would you enjoy more smut?

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: Mystical Items & Objects

Examples in Mythology and Literature

Pandora's Box

The god Prometheus stole fire from heaven to give to the human race, which originally consisted only of men

To punish humanity, the other gods created the first woman, the beautiful Pandora

As a gift, Zeus gave her a box, which she was told never to open

However, as soon as he was out of sight she took off the lid, and out swarmed all the troubles of the world, never to be recaptured

Only Hope was left in the box, stuck under the lid

Anything that looks ordinary but may produce unpredictable harmful results can thus be called a Pandora's box

Hermes' Winged Sandals

Also called the Talaria of Mercury

Are winged sandals, a symbol of the Greek messenger god Hermes (Mercury)

They were said to be made by the god Hephaestus of imperishable gold and they flew the god as swift as any bird

Cintamani Stone

Also referred to as the Chintamani

A wish-fulfilling stone that features across both Hindu and Buddhist religions

The stone features as one of many Mani Jewel (i.e., several gems that are mentioned prominently in Buddhist literature) images that can be found in the scripture of Buddhism

In Hinduism, the stone is connected to the gods Ganesha and Vishnu

Usually, it is depicted as a jewel in Vishnu’s possession known as the Kaustubha

The Kaustubha acts as a sign of divine authority

Arcane Artifacts & Objects

Offer a gateway between time past and time present, bringing layers of ancient history and new-world intrigue to a narrative

Such items are typically represented in fiction as works of long-lost knowledge, primordial features or landmarks, and curious objects of mysterious origin

Often lying dormant until the pivotal moment of discovery, these items invite characters and readers alike into a dance with the unknown

Examples: Necronomicon, Genie's Bottle

Necronomicon

Also referred to as the Book of the Dead

It appears in stories by H.P. Lovecraft

A dark grimoire (i.e., a magician's manual for invoking demons and the spirits of the dead) of forbidden knowledge

Used to open gateways of unearthly powers and cosmic horrors

Genie's Bottle

The classic magical item from mythology, also featured in Aladdin

A vessel of wish fulfillment that often leads to dramatic and unexpected consequences

Doorways & Portals

Doorways in fiction serve as gateways between worlds, dimensions, or states of reality, providing characters with universe-hopping capabilities and genre-defying journeys

These portals, whether physical structures or fantastical mechanisms, open up limitless storytelling possibilities, allowing for sudden shifts in setting and introducing elements of surprise and surrealism

Examples:

C.S. Lewis' wardrobe in The Chronicles of Narnia serves as a secret portal to a fantasy world, bridging the mundane with the fantastical

The eponymous board game in Jumanji transports its players into a wild and perilous jungle adventure, wrenching them from the safety of their living room

Jewelry, Gems, and Garments

Along with other various accessories, these serve several narrative functions, from symbolizing power and status to bestowing unique abilities upon their wearers

These items can act as plot catalysts (i.e. MacGuffins), embody character traits, or hold deep cultural or magical significance within a story’s world

Example: The Amulet of Mara in Skyrim not only reduces the cost of Restoration spells but also unlocks marriage options for the player, integrating gameplay with the narrative

Legendary Objects of Power

Carry with them stories of grandeur and lore, passed down through generations and intertwined with the fates of those who wield them

These are the objects that make or break worlds, bestow immense strength, and are frequently considered among the most powerful items in fiction

Example: Though it's never actually been seen, the Kusanagi Sword from Japanese folklore is a fabled sword that represents valor, said to be endowed with divine powers

Machinery and Technologies

Stretch the boundaries of physics and logic to offer a glimpse into what could be possible in alternate or future universes

These innovations, whether grounded in current science or verging on the fantastical, propel narratives forward and deepen the complexity of the story’s world

Writers can leverage these technological wonders to enhance their storytelling, using them to explore themes of power, ethics, and the human relationship with technology

Example: The body shields in Dune generate a protective forcefield around the wearer—advanced technology that current militaries can only dream of

Mundane Everyday Items

Possess extraordinary storytelling potential to transform the unassuming into the unforgettable

Seemingly ordinary, these objects can surprise both characters and readers, unveiling hidden depths and abilities when least expected

These seemingly mundane objects could fall into unsuspecting hands and create chaos or catalyze a hero’s journey

Additionally, they might only reveal their true nature to those worthy or capable of wielding their power, which can set the stage for narratives that are centered around discovery and mastery

Example: Oscar Wilde’s Portrait of Dorian Grey presents art as a vessel for dark magic, encapsulating the protagonist’s sins while he remains untouched by time

Sources: 1 2 3 4

[valeriianz]

Thinking about how we, as a fandom, seemed to have forgotten the ridiculousness of the mistletoe tradition. Oh, to be kissed by a stranger under a parasitic plant in public! Why yes, sign Dream up.

Thinking about Hob decorating the New Inn for Christmas. Dream drops in unexpectedly (but certainly not unwelcome) as usual, curious to see Hob draping multicolored lights along the open shelves of liquor behind the bar.

“What are you doing, Hob?”

“What does it look like I'm doing?” and Hob would turn back to his work, and Dream would watch, fascinated. Listening to the cheery music playing through the speakers, listening to Hob speak of the centuries past, how the celebration of the Christmas holiday had been pretty steadily thus since the mid 1800’s.

“The pagan holiday?” Dream would inquire, dragging his fingers along the taped up holiday cards along the backsplash of the bar, like moth’s wings stuck out and on display. Some even transferring soft glitter on Dream’s fingers, making him rub them together curiously.

“Well,” Hob would shrug with a grin. “The Christian bastardization of it.”

“Hardly,” Dream mused. “The Romans celebrated Saturnalia in this time, honoring the god with a feast and gifts.”

“No foolin’, eh?”

And, since it was late and Hob was feeling good about the work he’d done, he’d pour Dream a glass of red and offer him a seat, both of them sitting at the bar and admiring the twinkling lights, the smell of pine from the fresh garland, the garish oversized stockings tacked to the walls, and– Dream noticed with puzzlement, a single bunch of berries and leathery leaves hanging from the ceiling in the middle of an archway.

“I do not recognize this.”

Hob followed his friend’s gaze and, “oh,” he’d laugh. But it sounds… off-kilter, nervous or embarrassed. 

“It’s mistletoe. Just this– parasitic plant–”

“Why does it have a bow on it?”

“For fun.” Hob would level Dream with a look like, lighten up. Get into the spirit.

“Elaborate.”

And Hob would hmm and haa about this relatively silly tradition about kissing under a mistletoe, how the “rule” had kind of faded away in the past decade or so, but it was still a fun little thing and Hob, ever the purveyor of all things dreadfully human, wants to keep the tradition alive, even if no one really follows along anymore.

And Dream, knowing full well he doesn’t need an excuse to kiss his immortal, very human partner, decides to humor Hob.

He slips from his seat, hearing Hob snicker from behind him, probably knowing full well what he’s about to do, and Dream walks to stand directly under the plant.

The bar is closed, no one else is in the building, but Hob looks around anyway, like there would be anyone else who would take advantage of this opportunity. Dream has to physically bite down a delighted smile as Hob shrugs– well if no one else will– and all but jumps from his stool, slowly walking toward Dream with his hands in his jeans’ pockets.

Without even touching Dream, Hob leans in and pecks him on the mouth.

Dream’s brows rise up to his hairline. “Is that it?”

“I’m afraid so, love.” He points up to the plant above them. "They don’t hang these in public places for full blown make out sessions, you know.”

“Hm…” Dream considers this, and decides if the tradition of kissing under the mistletoe only yields one chaste thing, then he’d have to start collecting them enough to make something substantial out of it.

Cue the ridiculous montage of Hob finding Dream in various locales, venues, anywhere he’s at (even at a holiday staff party) and in all manner of positions, under a mistletoe.

“Was that even there before?” Hob would ask, a red solo cup in his hand and smirking like a fool at the sight of Dream slouching against the wall, a– quite large actually– mistletoe dangling from the ceiling above his head.

“Does it matter?” Dream would counter and Hob would shrug, fair enough, and acquiesce to the plant’s demands. It was a Christmas tradition, after all.

Or Hob entering his office at work and finding Dream draped across his desk, holding a plastic mistletoe that looked like it was bought at a drug store high above his head.

Hob would take a few moments to stand and stare, enamored by this ridiculous creature.

“You know how much I love you?” It’s not what Hob meant to say, he was going to quip something about dramatic Endless and their need for attention, but he’s so gone over Dream that his mouth barely cooperates with his brain in these situations.

Dream would preen, stretching his long legs down so they dangle off the edge of the desk, like a cat sunning himself, shaking the plastic plant for emphasis. 

“You could show me.”

This is their new tradition, every Christmas season. Hob finds Dream everywhere in the waking world, distracting Hob, raising eyebrows, and starting up strange rumor mills. But it’s in the privacy of his own home, coming back from work, and finding Dream wailing desperately against the foyer of his kitchen, a planted mistletoe hanging from the ceiling, as usual. 

“Oh, Hob Gadling,” Dream would cast an arm over his eyes. “How I’ve waited for you to come back and free me from the spell these dreadful berries have put me under.”

“Okay,” Hob would grin, biting back a laugh. “Would a kiss suffice?”

Dream would be hanging off the wall, his long, rail thin limbs bent at every angle under faux duress. 

“Oh! It might do. I feel shackled under this strange power this greenery emanates.”

“Dream of the Endless,” Hob would tease, dropping his bag and taking off his coat as he walks to his impossible lover. “Brought down by a common earthly sprout.”

“Yes, yes, now will you get over here?” 

And once Hob is within arms reach, laughing hard enough to wheeze, Dream would grab him by the shoulders and pull him in.

[the-potato-procurator]

hello !! hope you're having a good day/night

was hoping you could write headcanons for the courtiers (if you feel like it's a lot of work, Valerius alone would be fine) with a very affectionate s/o

(and sorry if my english is not great, it is not my first language^^)

Hello, lovely anon! Do not worry, English isn't my first language either and yes, you may have all five courtiers!

Vulgora

- At first it's awkward. VERY awkward. They are not used to gentleness, let alone affection

- The moment you embrace them, Vulgora freezes, looking down (or up) at you while they try to process what in the Devil's name you are doing

- You must consider yourself lucky. If it were anyone else they would've pulled a WWE on them and thrown the person in question across the room

- You know how touch averse people react when they receive a hug from someone they care about but they don't have the heart to tell them to stop? That's them rn

- When reality settles in, they pat your back slowly. If you laugh, they will turn beet red and ask you what's so funny

- You tell them they are cute

- "SHUT UP! YOU ARE THE CUTE ONE!" (Agressive flirting: check)

- It's okay, just give them time and space and they will eventually initiate the hugs themselves. Bone crushing hugs

- When they are finally comfortable with being touched at all, they are more than happy to receive your affections. Hugs, kissing, hand holding... You name it! Though, be warned, Vulgora's body temperature is above the average human's and varies depending on their mood

- They live for PDA and will show you off any chance they got

Valdemar

- Good luck trying to step close enough, it's like they can smell your intentions. The moment you reach out for them, they step away and look at you with the creepiest passive-agressive smile

- "Whatever do you think you are doing?"

- You tell them you just wanted a hug. They chuckle

- "No."

- If you somehow manage to make them feel the slightest amount of pity for you, they might allow you to embrace them... Once

- It's like hugging a corpse. They are boney, stiff and overall cold (both in a literal and rethorical sense)

- Don't expect this moment to last more than three seconds

- They don't mind your affectionate nature, even if they do not share or understand it at all, but just like they respect this behaviour of yours, they expect you to mind their boundries

- Never. I repeat, NEVER try to surprise them. They always have something sharp and dangerous between their hands and you might be stabbed

- But you are their friend, after all, so if by any chance they did hurt you, they will help you out. Just don't do that again

Volta

- This poor, poor baby. She NEEDS someone affectionate

- She is very clingy herself. She loves every and any type of physical contact as long as it's gentle and loving

- Holding hands has to be her favorite. Her tiny little grabbers are always on yours in almost every situation

- Did I mention how much she adores being carried? Please, hold her any chance you got. She is light as a feather, you won't have any problems

- Catch Vulgora gagging at how sappy the two of you are and telling you to get a room. You are happy, however, so you ignore their complaints

- She is very possessive. No one has ever been so kind to Volta

- "B-But MC! What if they take you away from Volta? Oh, she would be so sad... So sad..."

- Please, for the love of God, don't try to make her jelous. Not even jokingly. Her sensitive little heart is not able to take it and she will immediately start crying

- Overall you'll have to do lots of reassurance, and what better way to do that than to tell her how much you love her through cuddles?

- Volta just can't live without you now. She has horrible abandonment issues

Vlastomil

- Shyshyshy

- Take it easy with him, he might have a heart attack if you hug him out of the blue

- Catch him turning every different shade of red when you show the slightest sign of affection

- Don't get me wrong, he appreciates your display of emotion! He is just not used to it, much like every other courtier

- He has mixed feelings about PDA: he loves the fact that you don't mind being seen in public with him, but at the same time he feels everyone's eyes on him while you hold hands and that is not good for his social anxiety

- He is surprisingly good at hugging. He isn't too gentle or too harsh. He uses the perfect amount of pressure

- Expect a worm or two to sneak into your cuddle sessions

- "Apologies, darling! These little guys follow me absolutely every where"

- Don't worry, if you are not comfortable with his precious worms, he will make sure they are away for as long as you are there. That is not to say he won't try to show you they are harmless

Valerius

- Much like Vulgora, he is weirded out at first. He is not particularly fond of physical contact if any kind. Contrary to the Pontifex, Valerius is very much used to receiving affection (from his parents, that is)

- He stands perfectly still as you wrap your arms around him. It's... uncomfortable. For the both of you

- "Are you done, magician?"

- When you frown at his reaction, he chuckles. You freeze. He can smile? He can laugh?? He can feel any other emotion other than spite???

- Yes, of course he can. Only toward you, though. With everyone else he is still very dry

- Once he accepts his feelings toward you, he drops the mean attitude and turns into the sweetest man. He is very attentive, loving and (surprisingly) affectionate!

- He is not fond of PDA, though. Sure, he has no problem with a subtle flirting, maybe holding your hand for a while, but you won't catch him being all lovey-dovey in public

- He is a gentle lover and he only ever smiles around you. He has the softest, most sweet smile you have ever seen

- Cuddling is a foreign term to him, but does not mean he doesn't enjoy it!

- Valerius is not an over the top kinda guy, but that's what makes him special. He reserves his tender side for you and you only

There it is! Sorry, it took me quite a while! I struggled a bit with Valerius, but I finally figured him out! Thank you for your patience and hope you enjoyed 🩷

[makingspiritualityreal]

Venus in Virgo - A Broken Mirror

Planets in our chart on the Virgo-Pisces axis indicate a certain level of spiritual perfectionism. In Virgo, it's about control and refinement of the material, until we can feel God through our physical creation, in Pisces it's about the immaterial and blending with the creator through practicing the art of surrender, letting go of any human limitation and perfecting attunement with the Universe.

Regardless of which sign of the axis we are looking at, there is an element of correction in this part of the zodiac polarity. If you incarnate with these signs in your chart, your soul really wants to perfect and improve upon something, which naturally will also depend on the house placement of any planet there. This is not an easy energy to be born into, and it indicates a necessity of developing a certain mastery.

The reason why Venus of all planets exalts in Pisces is because you want a partner that is an external reflection of your divine perfection. You want a partner that encourages your awareness of your inherent spiritual worth as a being within this universe. You want a physical experience on this plane that feels Divine. This is the level of acceptance and surrender received in a healthy sexual act, a release of all notion of imperfection and joining God with your beloved through orgasm in a mutual acknowledgement of inherent worthiness of both participants. But you only attract this sort of partner because you internally believe in creating such an experience, and so anyone arriving externally is just a piece of a puzzle, that you already designed for your life subconsciously.

Venus in Virgo essentially has an impossible time achieving the highest, most blissful, deep and meaningful expression of Venus because of its internal self worth struggle. They feel like they have to constantly improve upon themselves to have any worth at all. Nothing they ever do is good enough for how they feel about themselves. As a result, they also nitpick others, which may not even be accurate but it's a reflection of their own insecurity. They may hurt the most loving partner because they simply can't accept even objective appreciation, since they fundamentally don't appreciate themselves. So as a result, with this placement any partnership you have will simply reflect how much you find fault within yourself, but it's merely a mirror and the other person just shows you the truth of yourself. It might even be a scenario where your partner simply has an average but healthy level of confidence and self worth, but your Venus in Virgo is so insecure seeing anyone believe in themselves triggers you and makes you want to "correct them" which is basically just externally spilling internal struggles with your inability to be proud of yourself.

The only solution for this placement is to develop a measurable skill and use it in service, and fill your daily routine with activities related to that skill. This way you create a regular outlet for your need for constant improvement and tweaking and build up a sense of self worth through being objectively useful.

[anti-the-glitch-bitch]

The Phantom Soldier

@codename-alias Thanks to this beautiful person I've started a new story. It's going to be covering harsh topics such as torture, PTSD, and whatever else I come up with in the future. So, if this isn't for you then just rest assured I'll soon get back to posting about Danny and the Batfam.

Chapter 1- You with those sad eyes

Tensions are still high between Tony and the Rogues after the incident in Siberia. Once Steve had gotten far enough away, he’d given Pepper a call to send someone for Tony, feeling guilty about leaving him stranded in the cold as injured as he was. It’s a couple of months before Tony is healed both physically and mentally from the pain that Steve had wrought upon him, but he does eventually use the phone that Steve had left behind. 

Steve had apologized for what had happened in Siberia but doubles down when anyone says anything bad about Bucky. Tony had realized that both of them had acted in the heat of the moment but ultimately still feels betrayed at the secrets that should have been aired long before that moment, and can’t quite trust Steve to have his back.

Bucky holds such phenomenal guilt at the anguish he had caused that he hides in Steve’s room back at the tower most of the time. Anytime Tony and he are in the same room together, Bucky immediately disappears in the hopes that Tony won’t hate him any more than he does. It helps to soothe some things in Tony, but until they talk it out everyone walks around on eggshells.

While the two teams try to figure out a way to balance this fragile truth, Steve brings to light the Hydra cells that still seem to be in play even after the mass info dump. They’re so well hidden that Steve and Natasha can’t figure out where to go even with her amazing hacking skills. So, they think that maybe Tony might have better luck, and luck he has in spades. 

Tony creates a program that searches for key files by infiltrating the entire net, no matter how deep it has to dig. Anything that had to do with Hydra, the Winter Soldier Program, or the Super Soldier Serum is viciously dug into and scrutinized. They manage to find several active Hydra cells in this way, although, by the time the teams get there, the entire place is always emptied of everything but the office furniture.

It isn’t until they come across a small piece of information about something called The Phantom Soldier that Tony decides that they need to use a different tactic since they are obviously not getting anywhere. When Tony asks Bucky if he’d heard of or seen this “Phantom Soldier Project”, Bucky pales.

“Well, that’s not a good sign. Come on, out with it. What’s got you looking so scared?” Tony asks as he leans up against the kitchen counter.

“The Phantom Soldier was something I was supposed to train,” Bucky says. “My handlers liked to talk about Phantom, and from what I could piece together when I broke free, it was a kid. Or…something that looked like a kid. Hydra made a deal with some government agency called GIW. They believed that ghosts are real and have the ability to mimic human form while only having a more animalistic mind. The GIW captured one who looked like a kid but had more power than the gods.” Bucky looks apprehensive as he continues, his expression darkening. “I don’t know what Hydra gave them in return for this kid but one of the few things I do remember is them hooking up a teenager to the chair. The one that wipes minds. That wiped my mind.” He sits down in one of the chairs at the island, avoiding Tony’s gaze..

“That sounds both insane and horrible. How come you didn’t bring this up before?” Tony asks, crossing his arms.

With his head in his hands, Bucky groans, “Because I thought it was just more nightmares. I can only remember bits and pieces of Phantom and I really thought it was just one of the many things that I’d made up. I mean, who actually believes ghosts exist?”

“I would say no one does but I would be lying. The things we’ve seen make me believe in a lot nowadays.” Tony starts messing with his phone. “Friday, add all this information to the search parameters and see if we can’t find something. Make this a high priority.”

“Sir, it would appear that someone has tried to do a media blackout for anything related to Phantom,” Friday replies. “I’ve started the process of deciphering all information and tracing back to whoever might be placing these orders,” she informs Tony as large files of information are dumped into his phone. It’s going to take him hours to go through everything.

“I don’t care where it leads back to,” Tony says. “Find out what’s going on and who’s doing it. Quietly, if possible. If not, well, they can try and do something about it. See where it gets them.”

~~~                                                           

It takes almost a year before Friday can track down a Hydra cell that still seems to be active. More pieces of information are found about The Phantom Soldier the deeper Friday digs. Like how they acquired the subject when it appeared to be 16. The different ways they tortured the creature. How it seemed to have a weakness to electricity. A few pictures are even found to go along with some of these reports.

The more information Tony goes through, the more sickened he feels.

Tony has to find this kid. 

Thankfully, Friday is able to narrow down the location of the cell and finds it outside a small town in Missouri. The population of the town is only in the hundreds and seems to be isolated enough that the nearest city is two hours away. A perfect place for Hydra to hide.

Tony has both teams meet him in one of the meeting rooms for a debrief.

Natasha, Steve, Bucky, and Sam all sit next to each other while Vision, Wanda, and Pietro sit at the end. Tony stands at the front of the table where a large TV sits on the wall. Rhodey, Bruce, Clint, and Peter sit on the other side. Tony had tried to get Peter to stay behind but the teen had heard about the torture that the Phantom Soldier had gone through and wouldn’t take no for an answer. So, rather than argue with him, Tony let him in on the meeting. Besides, the kid might be able to help in the long run.

“Friday found the base for an active Hydra cell near a small town in Missouri. From the heat signatures, the base is extremely large.” Tony activates a hologram that sits in the middle of the table. It spreads across the table showing off the building and the surrounding areas, including the entire town. 

“From the thermal images Friday has been able to get, there are a large number of Hydra inside. There’s a particularly large cold spot that I think might be where they’re holding Phantom,” Tony says, glancing around the table at everyone. “The security in this place is some of the most high-quality shit. Obviously, it’s still not as good as mine, but some of it is better than what the army has. Friday will be able to hack into it, but someone needs to get her into the system first.”

Natasha clears her throat. “I’ll sneak in to activate her. What kind of security are we looking at?”

Tony flicks his wrist and the hologram changes to show a bunch of different devices. “Their security cameras have both thermal and night vision with very few blind spots. I should be able to give you a jammer that will loop the feed for a few minutes,” he says. “There’s something in the walls that I haven’t figured out what they’re for, but they do have an off switch. They aren’t supposed to inflict harm,  that much I do know. I think it’s some kind of shield, but with an amount of power usage that I’ve never seen.”

He zooms in on a couple of the devices, rotating them so the holograms can be seen from all angles. “Some traps are embedded into the ceiling in case of any subjects escaping, although they only come down if an alarm is sounded. I’ll cook up something that will help you out just in case. You’ve got the typical guards patrolling the place.” Tony zooms back out and surveys his former teammates. “That was all I could find so far. The notes mention something about ‘ectoplasm’, but I haven’t been able to find anything out about it, so I’d just watch out for anything suspicious.”

Natasha nods. “Maybe Bruce can find something out about it from his peers? If it has anything to do with ghosts, then there has to be some kind of information floating about in the scientific field?”

Bruce quickly adjusts his glasses as he speaks up. “I asked around if anyone had heard of anything like ectoplasm and when I mentioned ghosts they laughed at me,” he says. “If it is connected, then the information is so well hidden that the rest of the community has never heard of it.” 

Peter raises his hand as he looks around at the group nervously.

Tony sighs and rolls his eyes. “Kid, this isn’t school. You don’t have to raise your hand.”

“Oh, uh, ok.” Peter looks at Tony before pressing on. “When I was starting middle school, there was this thing going around on Facebook. Some kid from a town called Amity Park was talking about how haunted their town was. The posts continued for a few weeks before it just stopped. When I tried looking into it, all I could find was a deleted account.”

“So, besides talking about how haunted it was, was there other information?” Steve asks. 

Peter nods. “Yeah. This kid would talk about whatever ghost seemed to be attacking the town. After a while, they started talking about this ghost called Phantom that would fight the other ghosts. The kids seemed to like him alright but none of the adults could stand him. The kid even posted a video of one of the attacks but the quality was really bad and it was hard to see what was going on. Something about some ghost called Skuller or Scaller or something. It was like something was interfering with the video.” He shrugs and relaxes back in his seat. 

“Huh. I'm surprised the media didn't pick up on that. Sounds like something that would definitely grab the news attention,” Sam says, leaning forward slightly. 

Wanda stops looking at the hologram to stare down Tony. “It doesn't surprise me that someone shut down any way for this kind of thing to get out. In the world we live in now, it wouldn't surprise us to find out ghosts are out there, but back then? It would cause panic and fear. Not to mention the army trying to figure out how to turn them into weapons if they can.”

“Except Hydra found out about it first and it looks like they turned this ghost kid into a weapon. How much you wanna bet they're the ones behind the blackout?” Sam says. 

Nat scoffs and shakes her head. “That's not a bet I'm willing to take. I'm surprised this wasn't part of the info dump that went out. Otherwise, this news would have been everywhere.”

“Maybe a completely cut-off section of Hydra? One that wasn't part of the rest of the system, but how that’s possible I don't know.” Steve says with a shrug, while the rest of them wonder how something so monumental could have been kept hidden for so long. 

“When are we heading out?” Rhodey asks. “And who's going? A facility this large means you're going to need a lot of backup.”

Pietro scoffs at the assessment and everyone turns to look at him. He shrugs. “I could take out the entire place in seconds. I could do that before your computer even hacks the place.”

“Is that so?” Tony says, crossing his arms. “What are you going to do if you come across this ectoplasm stuff and you can't get past it? Or it hurts you, or it negates your speed? We don't have enough information about this place for you to go in unprepared. Maybe after we get the defenses taken down you could, but it's still dangerous with that Phantom character around.”

Wanda hits her brother's arm lightly. “Think before you speak, brother. Not all problems can be solved with your abilities.”

“Most can,” Pietro mumbles quietly enough that no one comments on it. 

“As for everyone going,” Tony says as he claps his hands together, drawing the attention back to him, “We need Nat to sneak in and get Friday into Hydra’s system. Everyone else hangs back until security is down and their alarms are useless. Then Cap and his bestie can break down the front door while the twins go in the back. I want Vision to hang back until we find out just where and how to help this kid.” 

He shifts his attention to Rhodey and Bruce, who are sitting next to each other. “Sam and I will be air support while Rhodey makes sure the army comes running to sweep up the mess we are definitely going to be making. We don't know what state this kid is gonna be in if we even find him, so I'm going to have Cho stay on the plane with Bruce as her assistant. I don't think we'll need mean and green, but I'd feel better if Cho had someone with her, just to be on the safe side.”

“Mr. Stark, what do you want me to do?” Peter says, looking excited about the prospect of getting to go on an Avengers mission. He’s never gotten to go with the team on these sorts of things, but he really wants to go and help the poor soul that's been tortured. 

“Yeah, no. You are gonna stay here and man the helm. Your aunt would kill me if I let you go,” Tony says as he waggles a finger at the kid. It may be childish but nobody ever said he was mature. 

Peter sputters his protest as he stands up, gesturing wildly as he talks. “I can help! I swear I won't get in anybody's way or get hurt. I can even be backup like Mr. Banner! Mr. Stark, please, please, let me go with you.”

Peter pulls out his ultimate weapon and gives him the puppy eyes. The others look away except for Clint, who has kids and has become immune to that look no matter what his wife says. 

“No. Nu-uh. Nope. Not happening. Absolutely not.” Tony completely avoids the look by staring down at his phone. “There's no telling what this kid can do and I'm not going to be the one to tell May that you got hurt because you wanted to tag along on a mission way above your pay grade. You can monitor the progress from the safety of the tower and that's final.”

With a sigh, Peter drops back into his chair the way only a teenager can. “Fine but I get to meet him once you get him back here and patched up.”

The genius stares at his apprentice for a moment, just long enough to make the teenager squirm in his seat. “We'll see.”

“How long before we're ready to go?” Steve asks as he watches Peter slump in his seat, defeated. 

“I'll leave now and let the higher-ups know to be ready. Let me know when we can move in.” Rhodey says as he stands up and hugs Tony before leaving the room. 

“Be prepared to go by midday tomorrow,” Tony replies “Hopefully, Friday will have even more detailed information for us.”

The groups leave after that, all going their separate ways to get ready for the mission. All except Peter who glumly goes back to Queens to do his evening patrol. 

~~~

“Okay, people! We land in 10. Everyone knows their part, so do your last-minute checks now.” Natasha says from the pilot seat of the Quinjet. 

Everyone adds the last bit of necessary items to their persons as the jet lands. 

Natasha leaves the jet first, quickly and quietly easing herself into the building unseen. Tony had been able to get better pictures of the guards and had made her a matching outfit to go over her Widow outfit. Between that and the face cloaking device she wears, she’s unrecognizable. 

It doesn’t take long for her to find an empty office with a usable computer. After powering up the device, she sticks the flash drive holding Friday in. It only takes five minutes before Tony is on the comm telling her the security system is down and all parties are go for entry.

It doesn't take long for the Hydra agents and staff to start rushing around in a panic. Pietro finds Natasha almost instantly knocking out any guards that come around. 

“Hold your breath. Tony wants me to take you to the lab where the scientists are,” Pietro says, grabbing Natasha’s arm with one hand and bracing her neck and head with the other. 

This isn't the first time he's done this to one of the team members. They've all practiced this maneuver during training so that the motion doesn't catch anyone unaware. So, she does what he says without question. 

It barely takes a second as they zip through halls faster than the eye can see. Thankfully, Natasha’d had the foresight to put her hair up so that the flowing red locks wouldn’t tangle into a horrid mess. The sudden stop unbalances her for a second.

The entire room of scientists are in shock as Natasha and Pietro suddenly appear. The scientists startle as their brains finally kick into gear but before they have the chance to react, Pietro already has them tied up with tape around their mouths.

“Well, that was easy,” Natasha says amusedly. “What’s in here that he wants…” She trails off as she looks around. On one wall are large screens showing off a lot of information on one subject. Hurrying over to them, Natasha takes pictures of each screen so they can be inspected much closer later.

Going through a computer, she finds a file on The Phantom Soldier Project. Not only does it include information about the various ways they tortured the subject, but it also has information on how they’re controlling it. The file also tells her exactly where the kid is now.

“If anyone can hear me, Phantom is in a cell on the Northwest side,” Natasha says into her comm. “His room has those weird shields in the wall preventing him from getting out, so you might have to break down the door. There should also be a collar around his neck that prevents him from using his abilities. Someone try to get to him before Hydra activates him!” As she speaks, Nat pulls out another flash drive and starts downloading all the files she can get her hands on.

“We’re on it,” Steve replies into the comms.

Natasha pulls the flash drive out of the computer and places it in a nearly invisible pocket in her suit. “The lab is secure and I’ve got the flash drive. Anyone need help?”

“I could use-” Clint’s sentence is cut off by a grunt as a Hydra agent manages to kick him in the knee. He’s at a disadvantage as the number of agents overwhelms him. 

Natasha doesn’t have to say anything to Pietro before he’s rushing her to Clint’s side. 

There are small burns all over Clint from the guns that Hydra has, something the two Shield agents have never seen before. The gun barrel glows a bright neon green with the same colored smoke coming off it. Clint grits his teeth from the sharp pain.

Natasha and Pietro make quick work of the agents, taking a few of the guns in the process. 

“What in the hell is this powered with?” Clint grunts as he stands up, grabs a dropped gun, and looks it over. “Is this that ectoplasm that Tony was talking about? It hurts like a bitch.”

Suddenly, a large explosion shakes the entire building and several alarms go off, bathing the hallways in red. A high-pitched scream echoes through the comms along with static and sharp crackling.

“What was that?” Tony shouts, sounding slightly distracted.

“Wasn’t from my end,” Natasha and Wanda say at the exact same time.

Clint and Natasha look at each other with concern on their faces. “Steve.”

~~~

“We’re on it,” Steve says, grunting as he takes a gut punch from an agent.

Bucky appears suddenly and picks the agent up. As if the guy weighs nothing, Bucky throws him at a wall, swings around, and punches another agent in the face with a harsh crunching noise. With a practiced elegance, the two super soldiers dance around each other with ease, each fending off a blow that was aimed at the other. They’d spent so much time together that they knew each other's movements without having to communicate it.

By the time they’ve gotten the agents taken care of, the floor is littered with bodies. Most are unconscious but there are a few who met the wrong end of Bucky’s guns. There are scorch marks mixed in amongst the blood splatters along the walls from these new weapons, but Steve and Bucky’s bodies are already healing, leaving behind red welts instead of burns. 

“We need to hurry, Steve,” Bucky says. “If Hydra has done to this kid even half of what they did to me, then we’re going to be in for a rough time. We have to hope that they haven’t been able to activate him.” Bucky continues in the direction they were headed before they got ambushed.

“What do you remember about this kid, Bucky?” Steve asks as he takes off after him.

“He wasn’t human. They made him wear this thing that prevented him from using his powers. It was a collar but it would inject him with this poison so that he was too weak to escape. They made me train him to fight without any of his abilities so I don’t know what he can actually do.” Bucky grimaces slightly as he continues. “They were still trying to turn him into an obedient little soldier when I left. Something about his physiology prevented the chair from being completely effective.” He sounds regretful. His role in this made him ashamed even if it wasn’t his fault.

“Did they try and add any…accessories to him like they did with you?” Steve asks.

“I don’t know. Well, I don’t remember,” Bucky replies.

They slow down as they come to a section of the building on the northwest side. It’s glowing slightly with the same neon green that came from the Hydra weapons. Steve’s pretty sure that this is the correct area, but he doesn’t want to be wrong and come across another new weapon that Hydra has made. 

The hallway they’re in is filled with steel doors. There must be about fifty doors lining both sides of the hallway with no markings on most of them. Bucky and Steve each cautiously open a door and find that the room inside is an empty cell. 

The rooms are dark, with only the light from the hallway shining in letting them see just how barren it was. The only things in the rooms were a simple toilet, sink, and bed. Leaving the door open, Bucky and Steve move on to the next room.

They check room after room, only to find them all empty. When Bucky gets to a door marked with a number, he whistles to get Steve’s attention.

The room is locked and they don’t have the time to find the keys, so they try to bust down the door. With both of them kicking down the door at the same time, it finally dents inward enough to peel away from the walls. Both of them grab a side and pull, using the entirety of their strength until they’ve ripped the door off the hinges.

Inside is a kid who looks like they’re on their deathbed. They’re lying on the bed with their back to Bucky and Steve. Neither Bucky nor Steve can hear a heartbeat, but the kid doesn’t stop them from coming into the room.

This room is brighter than the others, a soft green light bathing everything in a sickly glow.

“Hello?” Steve walks forward cautiously.

The kid doesn’t move and they still can’t hear a heartbeat. When Steve finally gets over to the kid, he puts two fingers on their neck to check the pulse. There’s no heartbeat and the kid’s skin is cold to the touch. With a sad sigh, Steve leaves the kid where they are and turns to Bucky. Bucky looks upset when Steve shakes his head, but there’s nothing either of them can do, so they move on.

They quickly realize that the doors with no markings are all empty, so they only go after the doors with markings. With each unmoving kid that they find inside, the super soldiers become more and more hopeless. It isn’t until they get to the end of the hallway that they realize that they only have one door left, and with it, all their hope that the person inside is alive.

Steve and Bucky rip the door off its hinges, but before Steve can walk inside, Bucky puts a hand on his chest to stop him.

Inside the center of the room is a glowing boy, kneeling and chained to the floor. He can’t be more than 17 or 18. His hair is pure white and floats as if gravity has no hold on it. His eyes are clenched shut and he looks absolutely terrified. There’s a thick metal collar around his neck that hangs around his neck tightly. Chains hang from his wrists and ankles, leading to several metal loops in the floor, all tightly drawn so that he’s forced to kneel.

The kid has no shirt on and looks malnourished, his ribs practically poking through his skin. Wounds and bruises cover every inch of exposed skin, making it hard to tell if the slight green from his skin is natural or if all the injuries cause it. The poor boy is hunching over as much as he can with the chains attached.

Bucky takes a step forward into the room, but it’s Steve that calls out gently. “Phantom?”

A sharp intake of breath comes from the kid and he flinches. He opens his eyes and his gaze immediately locks on to Bucky. Panic and terror flood through his glowing emerald eyes as Phantom starts jerking viciously on his chains.

“Nononononono.” Phantom cries over and over again, desperately trying to get away from the person in front of him. “I’ll be good. I swear. I’ll do better this time. I’m sorry. I won’t do it again. Please don’t hurt me. I swear. I’ll be good. I’ll do it right. Whatever you want.”

Anguish twists Bucky’s expression as he listens to the teen’s frantic pleading. He’s frozen to the spot watching the tortured soul trying to break free of his prison. What did they do to this kid? he thinks. Fuck. What did I do to him?

Steve slowly walks past Bucky, towards the struggling boy. With all his strength, he crushes the collar and rips it off Phantom’s neck. It takes Phantom only a few seconds to realize he no longer has the steel wrapped around his neck, but when he does, it’s like his whole demeanor shifts.

There’s a cunning gleam in his eyes and with a deep breath, Phantom screams loud and clear. The sound is deafening, forcing both Bucky and Steve to cover their ears. Phantom stops and takes an even deeper breath and the scream becomes something more. 

It’s a banshee scream that sends Bucky and Steve flying back through the doorway they’d walked through. They’re sent flying all the way out of the room into the opposite side of the hallway with such force that they dent the wall. The longer the wail goes on, the more the walls start to shake, until the walls are shaking so much that debris rains down onto Bucky and Steve. They’ve just managed to get themselves up when a loud explosion suddenly erupts in front of him, knocking them back into the same wall with such force that they’re knocked unconscious. Their bodies slowly slide down to the floor, and the last thing they hear is someone screaming their names.

[wordsinhaled]

god, i'm just yelling, this is SO QUEER, this fucking story

the way you see dream, imprisoned, reflected in hob's glass in 1989

the METAPHOR of that. hob in '89 pushing the envelope of social perception to talk openly about his relationship with dream to the bartender at this pub??? while dream is imprisoned in a physical prison, and kept imprisoned there by his own pridefulness and inability to ask for support??? fuck

paired with the quote from the comics of dream having revelations about his imprisonment -- "The problem, he realized, was that those who had power enough to help him, he had not furnished with motive. While those who might aid him willingly, he had not provided with means. It came to him that if he had merely trusted more freely, his captivity might have been short indeed. But then... whom to trust?"

something something metaphor for self-isolation and lack of community and internalized homophobia

AND just... the visual transitions in these scenes -

dream's prison taking the shape of hob's glass—this last glass of liquor hob thinks he might get to drink in this memory-steeped space that has been their meeting place for six centuries. this glass of liquor that the bartender offers him as a silent sign of solidarity—the glass, symbolic of freedom and connection, the two things that dream in that precise moment utterly lacks, cut off from the dreaming as he is, but both things he could find in hob when he is ready, because hob is determined to wait for him

the subtext with the bartender—hob in conversation with queer elders, the glen grant, "old enough to be [hob's] father," "i'm older than i look," "in a hundred years"—speaking to longevity, to living beyond adversity, to surviving in the AIDS crisis

the visual transition from dream in his prison to dream's face reflected in the barrier as he stands in front of the barricade and hob's spray painted sign. he's free, he's ready to accept the love hob is offering him. and the momentary heartbreak in his face when he thinks he might be too late, before he sees the spray-painted sign - god, just the absolute revolutionary queer energy and malicious compliance of hob using his queer buying power to secure the new inn and breaking the law by doing graffiti so that dream will find him

the fucking hopeful, heartfelt, tender music that plays as dream follows the sign to the new inn??? the way he walks so slowly, so deliberately as though he's bracing himself for hob not having waited. the way he moves through the grass almost wistfully, like he's walking toward a dream he's had for more than a century. the way he looks around the bar and zeroes in on hob.

history professor hob!!! radical queer elder hob gadling, who looks mid-30s but has seen and felt his community's pain and loss and can bridge the gap between queer past and queer present. hob unlearning his biases and learning and growing to understand and fight against the structural inequalities and systems of oppression he perpetrated in his own past! fostering future generations of loving, caring, compassionate humans. giving people a safe space

the new inn as a Queer Safe Space, the MEANINGFULNESS of that, when queer-specific spaces are dwindling in UK, US, and other worldwide cities—this article from july 2022 states, "Take London, for example. In 2017, a pivotal audit by the Urban Laboratory at University College London revealed that since 2006, the number of venues for LGBTQ Londoners had fallen from 124 to 47, a loss of nearly 60 per cent." as of january 2021, only 15 nightlife spaces for queer/gay women were left in the US and there are literal community projects in place to try to preserve queer safe spaces

the idea of this carving out of space, calling to mind the queer chosen family, the importance of community

the way dream and hob smile at each other at the end. open, so open, so full of genuine warmth. together again and not to be parted. in the place that was meant for them, this place that is a reinvention of an even older place they had made their own - in the new inn that exists simply because of their love for each other

DREAMLING IS A QUEER GIFT, THEIR STORY IS SO IMPORTANT

[anteroom-of-death]

Teacher's Pet part 7

Synopsis: The first time.

A/n: I'm touch starved. And illiterate. Please enjoy! I cried 3 times writing this. Also, to my mutuals, I love you. To my readers, I love you. To Peter Capaldi, Sir??? Please??? One chance! To the 12th doctor, come home the kids miss you...

Oh, her face. The nervous look was delicious. The way she was trying to throw her weight around. The way she was making these cords of rationalization and connections.

His little doe-eyed human. A fawn. Maybe he’d call her that…

The way that she came undone. Of course, he felt her heart rate accelerating. Dangerously close to deafening. Her pupils dilated and sharpened, the little hitch her breathing took.

He felt himself give in to the animal. A byproduct of his exposure to Earthlings. His body adjusted and he felt all too eager to feel like an ape. Act like an ape. Not a species that rose above physical reproduction and it’d many impulses. Missy was right. These Earth girls were dangerous.

This was a very coordinated dance he was playing. Give her a bit of a taste of the real grandeur. Something in both mind and body so intimate.

She wasn’t wrong, as she said he was playing God. Perceptive. Very. He liked that about her, saw things from a side of the map others didn’t, even if she went in an atypical way.

He crowded himself in her brain in such a miniscule way as he closed in on her. Ending the space between them.

But he wasn’t going to leap until she gave him a clear sign of consent. He wasn’t a monster, of course. Just a man. A man with needs at the end of the day.

“Maybe.” She shivered. Getting further under his spell.

“Maybe isn’t good enough.” He pushed on her further. Getting closer.

He saw her give up and in.

There was his cue! He gripped the chair, letting his hands to brush onto hers.

She let her head shake in affirmation.

Game over. He won.

He went in, crushing her lips with a biting kiss. Cutting deeply between her breaths. He removed one hand from his grasp on the chair and tenderly grasped the angle of her face between it. Fully feral, taking what he was owed.

He was watching her eyes and saw the startled look fading. Something that spoke against her dignity and guard. It was real, real and he invoked it in her! A victory! Clear and concise!

He convinced himself to pull himself off of her. Give her the option of comfort.

“Now darling…” He muttered, petting her hair. “I can take you here on this chair. Or the floor.”

Her famous thinking and asymmetrical wit fired back.

“Make it a cliché. Fuck me on the desk.” She heaved. Collecting herself before leading herself there.

“Your wish is my command.”

She already was starting to remove her clothes. Already well-trained. He wouldn’t have to break her in as a companion. Maybe she wouldn’t be fate to a dark tragedy if he took her off to the stars.

He shook himself of those tragic thoughts.

He’d keep her here on Earth. His little safe secret. His to keep, his to cherish. To own. Away from covetous eyes or unforeseen consequences.

Maybe one day he’d introduce Missy to her. Trot her out. Have her behold his wares. His reward.

The possibilities were endless.

Back in the present moment, however. He had a beautiful woman, wet and ready on his desk.

He turned the photo of Susan around and put it face down.

His cock was hardening.

He quickly undid his trousers and produced a condom from his back pocket. He valued her illusions of safety. He doubted that he’d impregnate or infect her. But she’d probably thank him for the consideration.

He grasped the nape of her neck, curling a fistful of her hair in his grasp. Inhaling the scent, perfume, sweat, her pheromones and a trace of tobacco and the outdoors. An ode to her environments. He took and pulled her forward and lain flat against the surfaces.

Popping kisses across her breasts and caressing her throat with his lips and practically lapping up the beginning of a moan coming from her mouth.

His other hand got busy, she had to be ready for him. He could give her that. A bit of pleasure before he properly entered her. A long finger snaked it’s way to her pussy.

He could be different. He was. A trillion times better. No human man could outdo him.

He slowly stroked her clit with his thumb as he parted her folds. Delicate work. Like rewiring the TARDIS or building a device to track and contain shadow creatures from the 12th dimension. Miniscule little circles speeding up on the throbbing little head. Her entire cunt was slick. Made the entry with his middle finger deft into the tight center.

She was very muscular down there. It was a nice, tight vice grip. Would be great to feel with his twitching cock. His balls were aching…

His little fawn was starting to relax her grip on the desk, she leaned back like a very good girl and her legs sprawled open further. Her back arched up and her breathing hitched a bit more again. Her head cocked to the side and she watched him, her hands playing with themselves as they rest on her stomach.

“Show me some courage.” He goaded, slipping another finger inside. “You’ve been wanting this. I’ve seen you. I’ve noticed how you can’t stop watching me. Wanting me. Poor (y/n), can’t focus on her studies because of clever old me.”

He worked her deeper, as she rushed out a caustic, “Fuck you.” She clenched herself around his fingers. “Fuck you for making me want you!” She tried to accuse as she whimpered along.

“There’s a doll.” He said before releasing his grasp on her cunt. He could take that response.

He leaned forward and kissed her as he put on the condom. She grasped his hair and replied wordlessly, ferociously. Her breath tasted of her freshly consumed hot chocolate, old mint and honey tea, a cigarette and some mix of dental products. There was revelation and acceptance in her eyes and screaming loudly from her mind.

He wondered if, with the way she was broadcasting, if anyone sensitive enough to these frequencies in the next solar system over was picking it up.

Laying an arm across her chest and one braced on the desk. It was time.

He slowly thrust into her. A nice, even motion. Working slowly and evenly, he made sure that he was careful to not cause any pain. He’d forgotten a very important aspect of sex with humans, they needed lubrication to keep it nice and more than pleasurable. He hoped what little came on the condom already and how soaked she was would keep things feeling nice for her. He was spoken for.

He leaned down, putting the full weight of his body on her and went a little harder and a little faster. Whispering in her praise about what a good and patient human she was. That she was so smart and clever. A good student. And a new bright star in his personal cosmos.

His little pet fawn rocked her hips up, trying to match his pace in synchronization.

Eventually matching his.

It was a delight! He resisted the urge to go faster, even though time was running out. He didn’t exactly hang a sock on the door. Someone was bound to walk in. But he let himself luxuriate in the experience of his flesh on hers.

(Y/n) put her hands on his shoulders and brought herself up around, bucking up and trying to get herself to go faster. A hazy, lost clouded her face. But her jaw was determined.

What else could he do but oblige? He sped up, grunting. He would finish them both up.

He felt himself fluster and her legs kick up around his body.

An electric shot of pleasure rocked through his body and arched out from him, he could feel a monumental shudder come as he orgasmed. The tips of his fingers felt numb and his hearts beat alight in his chest- echoed by the singular heart in hers. All three pounding as he cupped her and brought her to a sitting position, pulling himself out of her.

He purred, as he pulled the used condom off his shaft. A gentle lob into the bin dealt with that.

“Are you still needy, darling? Want me to Doctor it?” He chuckled internally at his little joke.

“Yes, please, Professor.” She cried out. Clearly not finished. He reminded himself to correct her at another time and inform her of his true Chosen Name. But for now she needed to cum. He could do that for her.

He got on both knees and brushed her swollen, raw eager cunt.

He was like a man on death row, and his last meal was served.

He kissed her inner thighs and wrapped an arm around her thighs. He kissed her folds and gave a little suck and her knees automatically buckled towards his head. Her hands playfully combing through his hair. He continued to kiss and nibble and lick. Deeper and harder. More attention to her clit…

Her moans and grunts turned to suppressed screams. She was thrashing around his desk beautifully.

“Oh, I’m so close!” She confessed after a particularly hard to hold in shout.

He rewarded her with her orgasm.

Static electricity passed between then it seemed. A connecting current. Good, he thought, bonding.

Somehow, they ended up on the floor in front of his desk and she was wrapped in her jacket and his hoodie was laid on top of her legs. His pants were still pulled down to his shoes.

She spoke first.

It was shaky and her stammer was back.

“I don’t want to seem rude…but I don’t want to…not…do this again. And don’t think I did this for…wrong reasons. Please… don’t give me special treatment…because I let you hit…I never wanted this to happen…or had any ulterior motives. I really liked you. From the first class I had with you…I…yeah.” She seemingly couldn’t finish the sentence. She started to bring her hand up to rip off a finger nail.

The Doctor stopped her, bringing her hand down and resting it on her lap, his firmly on top.

“Yeah. Me too. I don’t take lovers anymore. I don’t need a distraction, but you? Wandered into my classroom like a fawn separated from its mother too early. A mystery. And of course you aren’t. I’ve seen your ethics. You may have some push and pull. But you’re still not a cheat. You would have found other ways to get ahead if you were…”

“Yeah.” She stared at the carpet.

“You’ll get special treatment because you’re special.”

“Oh.”

“Why don’t I whatsapp you? We can discuss this further. I have a class to teach soon. And you have your life.”

The two cleaned up, dressed up, swapped numbers and the Doctor kissed her hand gingerly.

He had to think.

“Don’t be lasagne.” He said. Shaking his head at a memory.

“Okay…I won’t.” (Y/n) shot him a puzzled look.

“And please, (y/n) take the hot chocolate.”

She reached down and took it before scurrying out.

Putting the picture of Susan back in place, he smiled at the guitar on the wall…

Lots to plot, more to do.

She might be perfect yet!