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#btw they all have themes of love if you even care
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mitski once said:
“i don't need the world to see that i've been the best i can be, but
i don't think i could stand to be where you don't see me”
and now i have to write this.
i really don’t get why people are so superficial about griffith, y’all like “nah, he always was evil vicious callous etc 🙄🙄🙄” and not even trying to look beneath, which is really discouraging because the eclipse arc made it very clear and showed everything in the most obvious way possible.
oh, remark: it’s only about berserk 1997.
so let’s start from afar. “griffith never cared of his people and friends, he easily betrayed them for batman costume 👻👻👻” like WTF?? he DID. he DID CARE. he sold himself to feed and equip his people, and it wasn’t like “he enjoyed f***ing that bearded guy ahshdjsa lmao 😂🤡🤡” (btw i don’t get this crap cause it seems like y’all are so obsessed with rape theme, but while feeling sorry for one victim you at the same time make fun of another. the hypocrisy of this fandom i can’t--). but return to what i’ve started. griffith always cared for his people; he never showed it and never admitted it even to himself, but he remembered everyone who died fighting for him, and i guess sometimes he really blamed himself for that — but again, never admitted it. those scenes weren’t given just for drama or something — these contradictions were always an important part of his character and determined his sight. failure would make victims meaningless. like people died for nothing.
another thing people don’t understand is that griffith never cared only about the power and the fact of becoming the king. people never strive to go on top just to go on top, all our actions are motivated by deeply personal reasons. so i think he really wanted people to follow him, believe in him, attach with his yearning. it always feels good when you see that people like you, need you, rely on you. that is what makes a leader a leader. of course you can say that it’s a selfish and vain wish, but aren’t all people selfish? you always set guts against griffith — so weren’t guts’ wishes and life stance selfish? i think it ridiculous to judge such things.
and now we get to the core — the need for love. love of thousands is pleasant, but in the end humans need something more than that. it’s lonely at the top, as they say. you still need someone to be close to, to trust and rely on. for griffith that “someone” was guts. “ wELL aCtUaLlY hE wAs NeVEr iN lOvE wiTH gUtS 🤓” oh STFU. you didn’t get the homosexual drama, but i did 🤭
and now i’m not going to speculate on was it healthy love or sElFiSh or tOxiC or pOsSeSiVe, i don’t care, you need to get that love can be twisted, sick, destructive, wrong, but it still LOVE. i agree that griffith did use guts for his own affairs, pulled in palace intrigues and etc, but it doesn’t change the fact that he had feelings for him that were able to confuse and mess him up.
“amongst the thousands of comrades... and the tens of thousands of enemies... there was only one man... you were the only one... who ever made me forget my dream” like WHY DO YOU THINK THIS NEEDED TO BE SAID??
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their relationships deserve a separate paragraph actually so i won’t drive too deep. all we need to understand is that guts became too important to griffith and it was literally the end to everything he worked for during all those years.
so, guts decides to leave, nothing now can stops him. griffith is messed up and disordered, he’s crushed and isn't really aware of what he's doing. and it is a very good subtext here — he feels rejected, so he goes to charlotte who’s obviously in love with him and has sex with her. it’s a reckless impulse, a moment of weakness, and it leads to the only mistake that cost EVERYTHING. and then griffith is tortured, mutilated and losing even the possibility to talk.
retreat: i find quite interesting how easily he lost that fighting with guts. you can say “well it’s just because guts is stronger blah blah blah etc 🙄🙄🙄”, but i think it was probably about griffith’s subliminal unwillingness to hold someone who’s already decided to give up on him. however…
what is going on in griffith’s head during all these horrible events? guts. guts guts guts. logic chain is simple: he got here because of guts, he lost everything because of guts, guts is the reason for everything he has to pass through now. i’m not blaming guts, but it’s just how griffith was thinking there — which is not surprising, like imagine yourself going through this kind of torture while remembering whom have you been and what you were striving for. all can imagine, but not all can understand.
“and yet… here, in this empty, hollow world… one thing is clear in my mind. him alone… like lightning splitting through the darkness… he appears in my mind so vividly. over and over again like the waves of a tsunami… hatred… friendship… jealousy… frustration… helplessness… affection… sorrow… they all come together into a giant vortex… they pin my fading consciousness down so that it doesn’t slip away. the one who caused this… my confinement in this darkness… will now… become the only chance at survival. when did it happen? this man, whose life was once in my hands… when did i fall into his powerful clutches? and now… in my mind i see him radiating so brightly it pierces in my eyes. guts!” IN BLACK AND WHITE
and this was the moment when love started to turn into hatred; when the pain of abandonment is so strong that it destroys the rest of the feelings. no one made griffith go to charlotte and do what he did, and yet he was so messed up with guts’ leaving that he went and did it. and now he isn’t even able to talk, to walk and to hold anything with his hands. no more fighting, no more winning. no more way to fulfill his dream. all because of guts. and still, affection is living. that moment when guts & co came to save griffith and guts holding him, griffith stretches his arm to touch… or to choke him? guess we’ll never now. however, some kind of hope flared up in him again. guts came back, and probably it will get better…
but oh, it won’t. only worse.
moving on scene when griffith lays in carriage and hears guts and casca conversation on the outside. it’s a VERY important moment that many people overlook, but it is exactly what led to the eclipse events as they are. so, guts is going to leave again and offers casca to join him, casca refuses because she needs to take care of griffith, and when she said that guts decides to stay. with HER. for HER. not for griffith. the story repeats itself, and griffith is still not that significant for him.
and look what happens here. griffith’s people saw his injuries and knew that he can’t lead them any longer. one part of them is going to follow casca now, the other one — guts. they all gave up on him. so did guts. the last one, whose affection griffith desired the most. what is for casca… it is a pretty complicated moment, but a part of the problem here is feel of betrayal. you can think as you wish but i’m considering casca as more like a sister, a fellow, a loyal companion and an assistant to griffith, than a love interest. like yeah, he had a dream where he lives with her taking care of him in small nice house, but… i think it is a question of a habit. we saw two women in griffith’s life: casca and charlotte. charlotte could be a key to power, but i don’t think that griffith wanted to even remember her after the torture. casca, on the other hand, was the one who was near him for quite a long time. she cared for him, supported him. so if griffith needed to give up and live normal life like simple men do, he would choose casca as a partner just because there is now other woman. but at this moment casca took guts away from him. another betrayal. and of course, it starts the jealous.
after overhearing guts and casca’s conversation griffith gathering his strength and drives horses to… somewhere. i don’t think he was fully aware of what he was doing, most likely it was just an another reckless impulse, but he gets into a river and decides to 💀 himself. it was a peak of his despair, but accidentally the red behelit returns to him — and the eclipse starts.
no need to retell, just want to make clear two things: 1) why did griffith betrayed his friends for batman costume 👻👻👻 2) and why he raped casca
moment №1.
besides obviously outlined in the series “he built his way on corpses and he must go on with no regret blah blah blah ☝☝☝” there is a much more important element of disappointment. like yeah, griffith is definitely disappointed about people and affections by this point. he’s not a leader for his people anymore; if they still feel something for him, it’s more like a pity for the cripple. and of course — guts. affection that cost everything, the reason why he appeared in such a position.
so now he has a choice: to sacrifice something that only ruins and ruins and finally get what he dreamt of the entire life, or to choose things that once already destroyed him and live the rest of the life as a cripple even unable to speak. noble are those who chose the second option, but i absolutely and with no doubts understand griffith’s choice here.
so yeah, now griffith chooses the power over everything indeed. he chooses himself and only. good for him <3
moment №2.
the rape. and the reason why that sacrifice was so bloody and brutal. yeah, all the people who appeared there with griffith went through hell right before their death. i don’t think all these sufferings and such nightmares were needed, like just blood & flesh & bone would be enough to give a body to femto, and still it was as it was. why?
it was said that femto will be born on the ruins of griffith’s dream. THE RUINS. so i think there was ruins of his personality either. during the last year griffith survived dreadful torments, the physical pain he suffered is unimaginable, and the trauma that leaves after such horrible events is immense. and it’s not a rare thing when people who survived violence now want to bring that pain to others — to make others suffer like they have suffered. femto is a product of griffith’s worst angles of personality, of darkest things that lived in him. so yes, everyone had to anguish and die the most dire way possible.
same thing is with casca. griffith NEVER wanted to rape her, like WHY WOULD HE EVEN DO, but he was angry and jealous because guts chose her over him. femto soaked it and just did the worst thing possible to avenge. and THE CORE: femto did it in front of the guts, so HE could watch. it was never about casca. only about guts.
idk what to write in conclusion. griffguts completely devastated me. love is an evil thing. never do such 💋
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rose-lalondde · 2 years
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Naruto Fic Recs Friday
Unsent Letters
Chapters: 1/1
Rating: G
Summary:
Gai finds a box of letters with his name on them when he's going through a neglected closet.
Comments: Actual old men in love and it made me weep. Big win fpr kakagai fans.
Twitch Streamer Yuji and Youtuber Megumi
Chapters: 7/?
Rating: G
Summary:
Yuuji is a famous Twitch streamer who does streams from his college dorm. Among his fanbase, his huge crush on a random book reviewer on youtube has become a running joke. The fanbase decides to make it their mission to discover who Yuuji's mystery crush is.
Megumi has a very small book reviewing channel on Youtube he started in high school. He doesn't even know what Twitch is, but Nobara keeps insisting he needs to help her find this random Twitch Streamer's secret crush. Her reasoning: the secret crush does youtube and reviews books.
Comments: As you will find I'm such a sucker for modern aus and this one is really cute! Megumi being a booktuber & its so sweet to see them fall for each other just through their channels.
Ain't That A Kick in The Head
Chapters: 27/?
Rating: M
Summary:
He really, really doesn’t want to think about what it’ll mean to be a double agent. What it’ll really mean. How he’ll have to act. How he’ll have to lie for the sake of his revenge, how he’ll have to reforge severed bonds. And it’ll all be fake. Is a false bond better than not having that bond at all?
Sasuke feels haunted by Itachi's death. Literally.
During their fight, his brother placed a seal with the remainder of his chakra on him as a protective measure so he could watch him from the grave. Itachi, however, did not realize that his actions would change everything... by being able to assist his brother with getting his revenge against Danzo.
This is the story of how one unhinged outlaw, along with the ghost of his dead brother, infiltrates a village to flush out the corruption within and faces those who he left behind. Including but not limited to: old teammates, classmates, and the guy he has feelings for that he keeps repressing.
Maybe they'll even save the world and have a proper conversation.
Comments: Itachi is so funny, literally causing drama from beyond the grave. It's naruto if it was a romcom, and its hilarious & very gay. Also I love sasuke in this fic <3
Redemption In A Worthy World
Chapters: 69/?
Rating: M
Summary:
Sasuke Uchiha has returned to the Konoha of his youth missing an eye and questioning everything. While knowing what's to come is an incredible advantage, his very existence starts a domino chain of events no one could predict. With both the Akatsuki and Danzo interested in a new Uchiha, Sasuke will have to fight to keep those he loves safe in the cloak-and-dagger world of the shinobi. Except things are changing before he's even woken up, his younger self is just as stubborn as he is, and he's going to have to learn how to parent all over again.
Comments: LISTEN LISTEN ik it says 69 chapters it's so worth it, especially if you love sasuke or fix-it fics or time travel or worldbuilding and lore. If you like learning about the Uzumaki clan and always wanted that to be explored go ahead and open it up. It's in my top 3 fics of all time, that's how serious this is. I will say that it's rated M for a reason, which is that the violence is very intense and a bit gory & in chapter 66 there's a sex scene, but you can skip it if you want. It's definitely emotionally heavy and, I'm not even gonna lie, it's a really long read. Personally, I don't care for the aliens, BUT they do their part & the writer makes them interesting, they're also not as prominent in the story as you keep reading.
The "Five Years" Game
Chapters: 21/21 - Completed
Rating: T
Summary:
Things have finally calmed down to business as usual—as much as business is ever usual, for the Ouran High School Host Club—and Kaoru is feeling some tried and true Hitachiin-brand boredom. Seeing this, Kyoya issues an intriguing challenge: he plans on winning a certain game in exactly five years. If Kaoru wants to beat him, all he has to do is figure out the goal of the game before Kyoya wins it.
As if a tried and true Hitachiin could turn down a challenge like that.
Let the “Five Years” game begin!
Comments: I feel like I should tell you that my only bookmark notes on here say "VICTORY!" Anyway, I love it when people write kyoya and know what they're talking about, he's my favorite host club member. I have not been into ohshc for a while and this made me want to get back into it. It's very clever and well-written, had a lot of fun reading this. Definitely cried a bit at the end lol.
Crazy Stupid Love
Chapters: 11/?
Rating: M
Summary:
Mikoto Uchiha and Kushina Uzumaki were more than just friends. What they meant to one another would take a lifetime to express, so they did. The shinobi world is cruel, but it is also very beautiful. Sometimes, you can still find that beauty on a battlefield or on a lazy Sunday morning.
A companion piece to Redemption in a Worthy World, but can be read separately.
Comments: It felt wrong to not include this when I'm recommending Redemption too. It's so beautifully written but it's so dark and tragic, but I think about this fic often. It's also good for providing background info on some things that happen in Redemption but they're both standalone fics.
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jellyfishvibes · 4 months
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I know the trios are named after their 'thing', the wayfinder trio all have wayfinders, the destiny trio are all from destiny island (they should probably be the paopu trio? like their symbol is the fruit not the island) and the sea salt trio are named after the ice cream they is the symbol of their friendship
Consider the case of the Sunset Trio, inspired by Axel's colour red speech, i just realized he was predicting their fate
Xion is pink/purple, her armour is pink, her half of the missing ache/pain of solitude is a pinksh purple recolour of missing ache, a majority of the shells she collects are pink/purple, when the sun sets the sky fades from bright blue to a purplish colour and then to a pink Xion is the first gone
Roxas colour is yellow/orange, his heart station is orangey yellow, his hair is the most yellow, before it was changed the way you told roxas and ventus apart in kh3 is that ventus had more blond hair, roxas hair was a darker yellow, after the colour of the sunlight and sky blend the sun gives one last burst of colour over the horizon, shining so bright it drowns out the blue and makes the whole sky yellow and then orange Roxas is next, in a blaze of glory
Axel, Lea, his colour is red, the red of his hair, of his charkrams or his flames of his keyblades of the blood he spilt for the organisation, the last colour the sky turns before it fades into the dark deep blue of night, is red Axel travelled the furthest, desperate to find those he was missing, travel all the way over to the other side of the battle field for them The last gone
And when the sun has set, the sky is blue, and the moon rises Only Saix remained, alone in that deep blue sky he was desperately trying to light up on his own But thats ok, the sun will rise another day and if you look, the moon will be up there in the light blue sky right next to it, dimmer, harder to see but still there
Ok poetic stuff over, Axel Roxas and Xion as the sunset trio, it also rolls over nicely from Sora, meaning sky, being the starting point of them, the canvas they were painted on so to say, and a nice roll into the implied trio in the next few games of Lea Isa and Subject x, who probably has a star symbol to go with her, celestial trio? space trio? and it rolls back into (if x is skuld) the daybreak trio of Skuld, Ephemer and Player/ daybreak uhh quintet? of the union leaders Feels good that Skuld, the norn of the future is connecting the daybreak and the sunset
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sunbedo · 4 months
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Hey guys. gay rights
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#i already made the sonic one a while bc yknow. kinnie stuff youve all seen my blog theme#but then i was wearing my Fearless Year of Shadow(tm) shirt along with it and my irl bff was like.#'why are you wearing a sonic bracelet with that shirt if you love shadow so much 🤨' *#(he doesnt know much about sth stuff but ive infodumped abt shadow and his backstory to him many times)#and i was like 😭😭 BECAUSE I DONT HAVW A SHADOW KANDI BUT I WANNA MAKE ONE. I WILL SOON#so. now i do!! taking my ad/derall on the weekends always make me want to make more kandi. its great!#and yknow what else it makes me want to do...... talk more on here >:3333#me and my dad are gonna go to a local jazz festival this afternoon bc our jazz combo is playing at it!!#itll be fun. my dad said hes gonna get some food from this really good breakfast place on the way thwre#which is not the best part. the best part is outside the shop there is a wonderful kitty cat who hangs around the parking lot#bc hes owned by the ppl who own the bar right next door#its so great. everybody knows him (the cat) and loves him. the v/ape shop next door has a tip door set up for him even though the#bar owner ppl take care of him and take him to the vet nd stuff. my dad found a faceb/ook page somebody made for him#and apparently it just has pictures of ppl at the bar holding him. its so great and hilarious. this cat is so loved#by the v/ape shop people. by random people at this beachtown bar. by the breakfast shop people.#anyways uh. this post was abkut kandi wasnt it 😭😭😭 lol#cherry chortles#anyways the add/er/all also usually makes me want to look at and sort through my pkmn card collection. so imma do that#because my dads friend (and my friend too i guess! me and him exchange cat photos bc he has this adorable chunky cat named gremlin) that we#play bar trivia with on tuesdays (dw its not really even a bar. its mostly a restaurant) asked me abt my pokemon card collection#bc the final question was to put a few franchises (it was like. dora the ecplora and spide/rman etc. and pokemon) in order of revenue#and obvs pokemon was the top. bc of factors like the trading cards so thats how that came up#we didnt bet any of our points btw but we almost! got it right! the order was pk/mn dora spidamen friends (the tv seies) but we had spidman#as second. but we still won!! our team is on a two game winning streak!!! we always split the money so next week ill get another 8 dolla >:3#wow i havent hit tag limit yert#lol. yall'll open the 'see all tags' thing and boom. do you love the color of the sky type shit 😭😭😭#sorry that sounds too much like aave. i (white baby) cant be sayin that#cherrys kandi#okay well i had a tag with a verse from the ultimarw showdown bc i didnt know what else to say#but with my kandi tag and these two tags i have hit tag limit. thank you folks ill be here all night
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volivolition · 6 months
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what's the theme you're fucking going for here voliiii!!! what are you fucking getting at!!! what are you trying to say, what's the point??
#still working on this drama chapter in Swept Up. they're. confusing to work with? from an empathy standpoint at least.#skill who is trying to honestly understand the other skills VS skill who is just always lying and putting on an act.#and then theres the whole thing that im not going to spoil yet but the dynamic. fuck man. i dont even know what im trying to say here#lying is bad? no i dont care about that. honest communication is important maybe? i feel like i need a central theme for this.#and i dont want the theme to be ''empathy good'' because low-empathy people are also good and i love them!! and also:#empathy is a flawed character!! i try to portray this. i dont like moralism/centrism which empathy believes in and is the main skill for#empathy you stupid centralist (affectionate) i know this is just because you don't know how to make everyone happy. who can fix this?#you dont think you can fix this! you feel too much debilitating sadness to make meaningful change!! responsibilite to others more capable#still. i do depict empathy as often kind on a small level because i think that's in character. empathy just helps you understand.#i guess this fic is also a ''empathy doesn't mean kindness. kindness is a choice you can make afterwards but empathy just means empathy''#but that's not a centralizing theme that all the chapters share. its also about vulnerability and the mortifying ordeal of being known#urgh. i'll think about it some more. knowing me its probably another ''love (in all forms) is the meaning to life'' type story lmao <3#i need to make a skill chart for this harry. all i know is that Volition is his skill signature but Empathy is his highest stat#hyper-empathetic harry with the rsd that comes from adhd!! haha!! suffering. everybody fucking hate you. this is based on me btw lmao#i was working on voli's chapter which has a flashback and child empathy! new to the mindspace looking out through harry's eyes and crying#the world is full of sad people and it's just too much for a lil guy! the backstory i have planned for this like. huh okay. wild. anyway!!#oh shit ive made a fucking breakthrough with the drama chapter. its not a theme but its something i figured out at least. we stay winning!!#chemi chats#task: swept up
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We had one of Steff's comedian friends staying with us on the weekend, lovely lad called Sam from Singapore. He had never been to Wales before, and he requested that we take him to a Welsh restaurant so he could try Welsh food
That's surprisingly difficult, actually. Like a lot of Welsh culture, our culinary traditions have not exactly been applauded over the years, so you don't really see them. But a lucky Google search revealed a brand new one has just opened in SA1 called the Welsh House, so great! Away we went.
Fuck me, they went all in.
It wasn't just the menu (though fuck me, what a menu - one of their 'for the table to share' options was little mini leek and cheddar Welsh cakes with salted butter and they were paralysingly good). It wasn't just that every alcohol was Welsh, even including the wine (surprisingly good btw, called 'Naturiol'.)
The table centerpieces were daffodils. All signs for the toilets were Welsh only. The walls had photos of Wales, modern and historical; the windows had the fleur de lis; the specials board (pork belly in Welsh cider and damson sauce with honey and wild garlic glazed carrots) had dragons on. I realise this is probably normal for country-themed restaurants, but I've never been to one for Wales before.
But the best bit, see, was the music
I clocked, when we walked in, that they were playing If You Tolerate This Then Your Children Will Be Next by the Manic Street Preachers (you always clock the Manics). Ah, I thought. A Welsh song! In a Welsh restaurant! Ho ho ho.
As they seated us, it became What's New Pussycat. Ah! I thought. Another Welsh song! Fu fu fu.
Then they played Monster by the Automatic and I was like my god are they only playing Welsh music?? That's so cool! What an eclectic mix that's going to be. We should suggest to them they should look into Welsh language music too, really mix it up.
And then they played Anrheoli by Yws Gwynedd and lads, Steff and I lost our shit. We lost our fucking shit. Sam's sitting there, utterly bewildered. The staff are nervously edging away from us. We don't care. It's the first time I have ever heard a Welsh language song played outside of a Welsh language setting. We're so excited.
"They're playing Welsh music!!!" says Steff. "Holy shit!!!"
"Imagine if they played Sebona Fi!" I say, humorously.
"Nah," says Steff. "You can't in a restaurant. There'd be a riot, it's faerie music."
"...what?" says Sam
We explain the cultural phenomenon that is Sebona Fi. The song changes: Primadonna Girl, by Marina and the Diamonds.
"She's Welsh??" says Sam.
"She's from Abergavenny!" we beam.
"I don't know what that means," nods Sam, who is from Singapore.
Next: The Bartender and the Thief, by the Stereophonics. We're in high spirits. The extraordinarily Welsh wine arrives, as does the rarebit on sourdough starter. Sam, a gay man, delightedly orders the faggots and peas.
They play Ben Rhys by Gwilym Bowen Rhys, and we lose our shit again. Sam is now used to this, because comedians are adaptable. "They even have daffodils!" I say, misty eyed. "Is that relevant?" Sam asks, fascinated.
They play Hiraeth, by PLU. Hard to explain that one. Very hard to explain the effect it has when it's played in a restaurant, but Sam looks around the suddenly muted room and whispers "Are we in church?"
"It's about Hiraeth," whispers Steff. "So kind of."
Next: the Masses Against the Classes, by the Manics. Utter tonal whiplash. This playlist is not remotely restaurant appropriate. It's perfect.
"You'd think they'd pick like... a genre," Sam says dreamily. "We just went from church to the barricades."
The faggots arrive. "I forgot it would be a western sized portion," Sam says morosely, of what to me is a normal sized plate of food. He tries one, and brightens.
They play Sebona Fi.
The place erupts.
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daincrediblegg · 6 months
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no you know what I'm going to scream about the stuff I talked about in the tags of this post publicly
I'm tired of the well-meaning "don't feel bad if your work only gets 20 notes your genius is what counts and do it for you!" bullshit. I've had a good handful of friends who have straight up DEACTIVATED in recent months because their work was not getting reblogged AT ALL. No, it wasn't from lack of not being well-liked, no it wasn't from lack of trying to make sure it was getting out there to the people they knew would engage with it. It was because no matter how much they were praised privately for their work, when push came to shove, absolutely NOBODY reblogged it and gave it the audience that it was due, and I'm tired of people shoving the "unsung genius" narrative as an excuse for it. Nothing excuses that. And the boop event really proved that.
because I know given the opportunity, indiscriminately pressing a button (sometimes 10 thousand times, as I did) is not beyond this website's capability. y'all loved doing that. and look at what it wrought. nothing but love and affection and happiness. just from a couple of quick clicks of a little paw button. sure. nobody knew who you booped but the other person (which is how likes used to work on this website, btw). there was an element of anonymity to it. but that is kind of the core of this website that no other social media platform still has: the ability to be anonymous. and hyper-curating a blog on here like you might on twitter or instagram to project an image is simply not viable. and hey. you wanna know a secret: literally nobody cares what you post or whether it goes with the "theme" of your blog or not. yeah. I know. CRAZY concept in this day and age. but literally. I myself have reblogged things that have had nothing to do with whatever I am currently fixated by and you know what happened to my follower count? not a damn thing. in fact, I actively try to reblog things specifically BECAUSE it's my friends who made them (even though I'm not always good at KEEPING UP WITH HOW MUCH THEY POST @prismatica-the-strange will NEVER GO UNRECOGNIZED by me).
And you know what fucking sucks? I have to deal with this too. surprise right? you ever wonder why I reblog fics or art I post like 20 times the day that I post them? do you ever wonder why I ask about tag lists and beg for asks all the time? IT'S BECAUSE EVEN I GET LIKE. 5 LIKES ON THE THINGS I POST. AND THE REST OF THE REBLOGS ARE MINE SO I CAN MAKE SURE THAT PEOPLE WHO WANT TO SEE WHAT I MAKE GET TO SEE IT. and I say that knowing that I'm certainly not an unpopular blog, or an unpopular writer. I know that people love the stories that I create. Hell, half of the people that I've talked to about lady terror have told me that they consider her to be canon (AND EVEN SOME!! THOUGHT SHE WAS!!! WITHOUT EVEN HAVING WATCHED THE SHOW! WHICH IS STILL SO SO WILD TO ME!!!) But especially in the last 4 years (which really dates this phenomenon), my posts, no matter how well received they've been amongst people I've talked to about them directly, I still go into the notes and at least half (often more than half) are MY reblogs to make sure people saw what I posted. and it happens every single time, and I can't tell you how much it crushes me considering that it used to be that I would be able to post it only once, and people would reblog it sometimes even HUNDREDS of times.
It's not about popularity. it never has been. it's not about anxiety. or shifting website cultures. even if you lurk, the simple fact is, that if you want people to keep making what you love. you have to reblog. your theme won't suffer because you reblogged a fanfiction that you really admire. your posting won't be ruined because you reblogged some fanart from someone in a different fandom. really. I promise. and if people do unfollow you for that? who needs em. followers come and go but you should NEVER have to cater to them. on this website it has ALWAYS been the other way around. lean into it. make it yours. put stuff you ACTUALLY WANT to be seen and that you love and appreciate on your blog. no matter how old it is, how new it is, no matter how niche or off-theme it is.
so please. if you really want to show your appreciation for someone's work? you reblog. it's really as easy as that. check the tags. add some when you reblog if you like. but please for the love of god reblog. it's as easy as booping and even more rewarding for the people who you reblog from. if you want to let someone know that their work is genius and appreciate it? show it. reblog. then DM them if you're too nervous to say what you want to say but not in a public forum. but for christ's sake. REBLOG.
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theyluvlyss · 2 months
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𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐩𝐨𝐨𝐥 & 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐲...
my head is all but consumed with thoughts only of wade wilson, logan howlett, and remy lebeau. they're all I can process in my head (besides shazam, but that's a given considering no one loves shazam the way I do, so🤷🏽‍♀️) and I y e a r n desperately for an influx in "wade x y/n x logan" fics and the "remy x y/n" fics... dare I even ask, humbly ofc, hear me out... for a splash of "wade x y/n x remy". genuinely, I'd kill for some of that ngl.
and I bet you're wondering, "lyssa, why not do it yourself🤔?"
short answer: I am swamped with requests, and even if I wasn't, I'm not ready yet lmao I fear I do not possess the skills to capture them in my writing perfectly😔 ... yet😈.
in the meantime, tho *😈evil little laughter😈* may I plz suggest the following prompts and pairings to and for anybody willing to work with them or wanting ideas (begging any writers that see this to please write these and tag me plz plz plz plz plz 😭🙏🏽😃plzplzplzplzplzplzplzpl-)...
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⚠️trigger and content warning btw lol -
mentions of fighting/violence/bloodshed, death, gore, (like c'mon,,, bffr, look at who you're reading about😐🤨), anxiety/panic attacks, harsh words/themes/elements/physical injuries, abuse and/or negelct, separation anxiety, mental disorders, brief mention of sickness/illness, drugs (just 🍃 and painkillers), age gap (nothing illegal, chill out🤨✋🏽), use of a derogatory term (not used in a negative sense tho lol), and some semi-common smut themes that I won't list here, but be wary if that stuff makes you uncomfortable :)♡. also, these are all under the pretense that the reader is a cis girl, she/her/hers pronouns (so ig you could think of this as one, big, mass request to all writers willing from me lol🤭🥴🫶🏽).
𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭/𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭/𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 :
- reader having a panic/anxiety attack and ofc being comforted (causes my vary; maybe right after a fight/battle, or because of over-worrying or too much pressure, maybe after a fight with another loved one, etcetc). definitely wanna see this with all three of them, but separately, tho. like, one fic or list of "preferences/headcannons" for logan, one for wade, and then one for remy.
- near death or death (followed by resurrection swift after). it could be reader almost dies or dies (then gets resurrected, get creative with it/how, fr, yk?) or the reverse; the POI (person of interest) dies, although given two of the three's abilities, y'all might have to get creative if you want it to translate for logan and/or wade so this one would be mainly for a remy x reader.
- I personally love a good "POI says sumn mean/outta pocket, hurts reader's feels, stuff happens idk, but they eventually kiss and make up" trope. I'd eat that up, especially cuz OHHH,,,, wade taking a joke or playful argument or something too far? logan being a little too mean/angsty to you for comfort?? remy saying something that gets lost in translation, so it comes out harsher than intended??? 😫😫😫‼️‼️ AND IF YOU WANNA GET MESSY WIT IT, RUNNING TO ONE OF THE OTHER THREE FOR COMFORT🙈🙈⁉️⁉️⁉️.
- a classic; reader getting injured (mildly or worse, doesn't matter), needing to be taken care of, but is stubborn about it?? always a good one.
- getting a little crazy and silly here, but I like a good "abusive and/or negelctful ex/current partner" trope. like hell yeah, one of you big, strong men get over here and save me, whisk me away and show me what I really deserve😻‼️. NOT romanticizing/glorifying it obvs, like no, I mean that wade, logan, and/or remy would not be the red flags in this scenario, they're the one(s) doing the saving FROM the red flag ex/current partner lol.
- getting a little crazier and sillier with this one, but one where reader gets snatched up🙂? oouuuu, miss girl got kidnapped?! once again, somebody come save me, and if "somebody" is not wade, logan, and/or remy, then don't bother, I don't want it. matter of fact, just gon' on ahead and leave me, I'll figure it out myself🙂✌🏽. I think I'd want these separate, actually, bc I wanna take in the individuality of their reactions, like,,, logan going feral?? pretty predictable tbh lmao but still hot. remy?? idek ngl, y'all gon' have to figure him out. BUT WADE BEING SERIOUS AND NOT AS TALKATIVE FOR ONCE UNTIL HE KNOWS YOU'RE SAFE???? OOOHOOHOOOOOOO, GIMMIE🖐🏽👹🖐🏽✊🏽👹✊🏽!!!
- ig this could be put in the panic/anxiety attack category, but I also feel like this might be it's own separate thing, so idk, but... separation anxiety on reader's part. whatever the circumstances may be to breed it, reader is just (not in a unhealthy way) attached to the POI(s), so them leaving for whatever reason is pretty hard on her (and the POI(s), too, because hello, they don't wanna make their reader upset, but things gotta get done fr yk😫🥲),,, lots of reassurance, comforting, and maybe distractions ensue??
- reader with an alter ego/inner beast, whether that be a result of her powers or a mental disorder (think like,,, split personality or maybe DID or something like that, but I do wanna say, if you're gonna go the mental route, make sure you do your research so that you're representing it - not only accurately - but you're not dehumanizing or dumbing it down as well) or just anything that would cause the reader to, as I said, have a different side of themself,,, werewolf type deal, yk? "normal" for the most part, but then has her moments where she be on demon time and then when she's back to herself, she's just like "???" while everyone else is like "!!!". I suppose this could then be followed up/solved with a "the sun's getting real low" typa thing/moment from the POI(s), but that's neither here nor there, do what feels right fr♡.
- reader (just barely) escapes cassandra nova??? that could be cool (a.k.a. very, very angsty bc surely the encounter has messed the reader alllll the way up both mentally and physically, especially knowing what typa timing cass be on lmao😃). love a good hurt/comfort, I can't get enough, actually. this one (given the movie context) may or may not work with wolvie and/or pool (again, up to the writer to get creative), but gambit?? he's been in the void his whole life, he knows cass, sooo it'd make more sense for him to have a higher understanding of the situation in full, but do what y'all want, I'm just the idea woman🤷🏽‍♀️.
𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟 :
- morning cuddles and softeness and ughghfhfhdjd♡!!♡!♡!!♡!♡!!♡!! and then the opposite, night/bedtime cuddles and softness and uugjfjdkwkfke♡!!♡!♡!!♡!♡!!♡!!
- height difference teasings and shenanigans. we can always stick to the classics, ofc, short reader, tall wade, logan, and/or remy. maybe its an advantage in fights - fast, lethal, and small + big, shielding, and strong - but sucks in more domestic/calm cases like reaching for shit on the top shelf or wanting to kiss somebody. but I'd also love some tall gworl reader type shit, miss strong, lean, runway model energy, stepping on any heads and wooing any men that are in her path🥴😻. bending down with a smile so she can hear him, mindlessly playing with his hair, occasionally makes a quip here and there on the difference without thinking lol and he haaaaateeees all of it (but he looooveeeessss all of it🤭).
- reader being THAT GIRL, literally being in a 1v26 or sumn crazy like that and she's just kicking ass and shit the whole time, and then there's the POI(s),,, gawking and in love like "damn that's MY GIRL fr\😻/!!".
- *imagine a vine boom after every bolded word, okay, go* teen/minor/young PLATONIC NONSEXUAL NONROMANTIC (literally I can not stress this enough) NOT DATING AT ALL EVER reader and one/two/all of them. I think it'd just be silly seeing them (wade, logan, and or remy) working/paired with/having a bond with this little gremlin yet sweetheart of a reader who's somehow able to tolerate/put up with/ignore/maybe even indulge in their craziness lmfao. maybe just as or is even more crazy than they are, chaotic and desensitized type shit. you could even get ansgty with it, have this teen reader need saving or something like that, yk?
- sparring match and reader BEATS POI(s) in said spar cuz she's cool, awesome, and mega baller like that. lots of tension and goofiness, especially from the reader, cuz she knows damn well she's the shit. or, a different route!!... total dumb luck that she beat him/both/all of them, and is very obviously playing it off/acting like she won on purpose lmfao, cockiness ensuing.
- can't go wrong with a sick-fic lol. who doesn't wanna be taken care of?
- reader needs/wears glasses🤷🏽‍♀️. it can be the discovery of actually needing them, reader always squinting tryna read/see shit, or nearly getting herself in and out of danger bc again, she blind lmao. or it's just the case of reader never wears them out and about, but in calmer moments (where she doesn't run the risk of breaking them) she'll put them on, so she decides to bust 'em out one day and it's just the POI(s) being like ":O...😻😻!!".
- *olivia rodrigo voice* JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY, YEAA-aAAH😫😫‼️ ... reader who just,,, she don't play that shit, man, lmfao it's called you can prove yourself either friend or foe,,, stay tf away from my man or get your ass beat. pick one. and it's the POI(s) just absolutely flattered and amused with this energy from reader lmfao, reassurance ensuing quick after ofc. or, if you wanna get silly with it (and by silly, I mean violent♡), reader with a girl who can't take a hint😀 *eye twitch* so she finally makes shit clear one way or another (one way; does sumn with the POI(s) that makes the girl uncomfortable so she fucks off. another; reader pretty much beats that girl up and it's the POI(s) laughing but also trying to pry reader off of her cuz "stop it, I'm yours, I promise, you don't have to kill her, she didn't know any better😭!"). or just completely switch it up, vice versa, role-reversal POI(s) get jelly and it's reader having to deal with whatever may happen after/due to the fact lol.
𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 :
- shameless flirt reader!!!! she's not obnoxious or out of character/proper timing with it, but definitely a reader with helllllaaaaa rizz. is mainly on some "is somebody gonna match my freak?" type shi. wade would find it very silly and he'd match the freak ofc. logan,,, maybe he'd start off annoyed by it, then get used to it, only realizing you've actually grown on him once you start to pull back a little/stop completely? REMY WOULD LOVE AND BE AMUSED BY IT, so all I'm gonna say here is this: rabbits🐇🥰. iykyk♡.
- a smoke sesh leading to some good, old fashioned high/sleepy sex🥰. that's it, that's the prompt♡.
- lord, free me from my sins🙏🏽, plz don't judge me y'all😔 ,,, age gap😃? NOTHING CRAZY, CHILL, but yk, like,,, just a little young thing in her 20s or sumn being scooped up by one (or two🤭) of these older, more mature, aged like fine wine, and experienced men,,, that's all🥰.
- that moment when reader is a whore and is actually literally prancing around without a care in the world, fucking three different guys (wade, logan, and remy obvs) because "they're hot lol" - not necessarily behind their backs - but no one's saying anything or telling her no, nor does anyone seem to have any issues with it/are opposed, sooo😗🤷🏽‍♀️.
- do y'all think,,, because wolverine is yk...wolf-like-ish-whatever.... do y'all think that he,,,, that maybe he goes thru... a rut🙂?? lmfaoGDHAKXKPQPRR okay that's enough, that's enough🥴✋🏽-.
- you know how some smut has certain labels/themes/tags that are gonna be, yk,,, in said smut?? well, cuz I'm out of any specific ideas for smut, I'm just gonna leave some here, m'kaaaay, and whatever y'all wanna dooooo is up to youuuu, just as long as I get to seeee😗☺️🫶🏽~...
⚠️ also don't say I didn't warn y'all, I mean, there's literally a whole ass trigger warning at the top, so do not start fckn trippin' because you disagree with me or saw sumn you don't fw, cuz tbh, I don't care and you can honestly block me if it's that serious♡.
dom-sub, daddy/praise/breeding/spanking kink, knife/gun/blood play (and/or just mutant/power ability play in general hehehe), food/wax play, cnc (I don't suggest full blown non-con seeing as none of them seem the type to do such, no matter the circumstances, plus it's just not my thing personally but hey, I'm not currently writing for pool, wolvie, or gambit rn, so that's up to whoever is🤷🏽‍♀️), hunter-prey (y'all might see this and immediately think wolvie, which is understandable fr, but I beg y'all to get creative and let remy and/or wade hunt reader down, it can be done and done right, I promise, plz, I need it, 😫PLEASE!!-), friends with benefits,,, OHHH ENEMIES with benefits🫢🫢!!, overstim, jealousy/possessive/yandere, unprotected/creampie/oral ... that's all that comes to mind lmao wow what a crazy note to end this on, anyways-
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yeah, so, do with all of this what you will (and plz spread this around, I genuinely do wanna see these get written and myself tagged like I am PINING for these fic ideas to be turned into reality😭🙏🏽), I just had to get my thoughts out before I forgot (at least in the fanfic department), because if someone were to ask me my thoughts on the movie itself !!!!! OMG I could run my mouth forever, but I don't wanna do that (lazy) so lmao for now, that's all lol byeeee~ /ᐠ-˕-マ!!
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riddlerosehearts · 9 months
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thinking about how people who watch the emperor's new groove and somehow come out of it shipping pacha and kuzco, or thinking yzma only became evil when kuzco fired her and that she would've been a better ruler than him, are both so wrong in so many different ways and are also missing one of the things that i absolutely love about the movie. which is that, the way i see it, pacha and yzma are counterparts. as parental figures to kuzco.
like, just to get this out of the way first, yzma was a dismissive asshole to a peasant whose family was starving. and yeah, if kuzco had been in her place he definitely would've also done that, which... is why she would not be a better ruler than him. she'd just be the same because they're both horrible people in the exact same ways. her reaction to being fired is to plot murder, and as soon as his funeral is over she sets everyone to work on replacing paintings of kuzco with paintings of herself and covering the palace with imagery that makes it clear that it's all about her now. i'm not even sure why this is a discussion tbh.
and also, kuzco is literally a teenager. he's barely 18 years old. source: in the movie, yzma says at his funeral that kuzco was "taken from us so tragically on the very eve of his eighteenth birthday." she also claims in the movie to have "practically raised" him, to which kronk replies "yeah, you'd think he would've turned out better". and sure, she could be exaggerating, but what evidence do we have that she is? we learn absolutely nothing of his parents, who are never mentioned even once in the movie, or of anyone else who could've raised him, and she's his advisor who for some reason sees no problem with attending to royal duties in his place. most likely because she's his regent. also, i'm not exactly a fan of the sequel tv series "the emperor's new school" but it does have something that backs up my point: kuzco is revealed to be an orphan and just before his father went and got lost at sea, he asked yzma (who was also his advisor) to take care of kuzco if anything happened to him. so, yeah, the writers who worked on the series clearly thought that yzma genuinely did raise kuzco, and nothing in the movie contradicts this.
and i find the idea of her being his only parental figure for pretty much his whole childhood incredibly interesting because, and this also goes back into why she wouldn't be a better ruler than him--she mirrors him as a reflection of what would've become of him if he'd never met pacha. they're both incredibly arrogant, power-hungry, selfish, and cruel, with a tendency to blame their problems on everyone but themselves. yzma was even originally going to have her own reprise of kuzco's theme song "perfect world", which i really wish had been kept:
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[ID: Lyrics that read:
I'Il be the sovereign queen of the nation And the chicest chick in creation I'm the cat with all the cream and ooh-la-la This deadly concentration Will put an end to my frustration Now this perfect world begins and ends with moi
What's my name? Yzma, Yzma, Yzma Yzma (what's my name?) Yzma, Yzma (What'd you say?) Yzma (Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!) Yzma. End ID]
(this song can be fully heard in "the sweatbox", the documentary about the making of the movie, and is also on youtube btw)
anyway, i'm sure yzma would not exactly have been the most nurturing or hands-on guardian, especially given that she and kuzco don't exactly treat each other like family. but it makes a lot of sense to think that her behavior influened kuzco's throughout the years. and for the entire movie, she remains determined to kill him. when he tries to reason with her and admits that he should've been nicer, she says the same thing to him that he originally said when he fired her. she never grows or changes and in the end, she hurts the one person who was willing to stand by her (and even then, kronk had never fully been on board with her plan) and he ends up trying to crush her with a chandelier. kuzco on the other hand is able to realize the error of his ways, come to regret who he was in the past, and start taking steps toward being a better person. his theme song gets a reprise where it's changed from a song about one person being the center of the world to a Power Of Friendship song. why? because, as i've already mentioned, he has pacha.
pacha, who similarly to both yzma and kuzco is in a position of authority as the leader of the village but unlike either of them is gentle and humble. who isn't afraid to stand up to kuzco and be honest with him even though he's the emperor, who agrees to take him back to the palace but has no obligation to be so helpful, kind, and caring toward him--and just about every reason not to be--and still chooses to be anyway. pacha who is 45 years old (also stated in the sweatbox documentary) and can see that kuzco is practically still a kid, not a single day over 18, who has time to grow and change. pacha, who already has a wife and two kids with another on the way, but practically treats kuzco like one of his own. who acknowledges that if kuzco dies all his problems will be gone and then still worries about him and goes out of his way to rescue him after he wanders into the jungle. who sees kuzco shivering at night and covers him with his poncho, who carries him when he's genuinely too weak to keep walking, who refuses to give up on him even after repeatedly being betrayed by him because he believes there's good in everyone.
also, while yzma ends up repeating kuzco's harsh words of dismissal as she tells him of her plans to kill him, kuzco had previously repeated pacha's words that "nobody's that heartless" after he saved pacha's life. and as the movie progresses kuzco and pacha's relationship becomes more and more equal and is constantly contrasted by moments of yzma being cruel and unappreciative of kronk's kindness. a good example of this is how kronk is constantly being forced to carry yzma everywhere on his back while yzma literally walks all over him and steps on his hands when she gets down, whereas when pacha briefly carries kuzco after the latter collapses he tells him he'll have to walk the rest of the way later and kuzco doesn't even protest.
idk if i'm even explaining well what i'm trying to say here. but basically, if yzma actually raised kuzco and contributed to his current behavior, then she and pacha both are figures who guided him and helped him grow. only yzma helped him become the tyrant that he was at the start of the movie, who was selfish and callous and saw everyone else as beneath him. whereas pacha helped him see the value in being selfless and considerate of others. and in the end, yzma is stuck as a cat and nobody is concerned about her. kronk has found a new job that makes him genuinely happy, while kuzco has decided to build a hut on the hill next to pacha's and effectively joined his family. in the sweatbox documentary it's even mentioned that chicha and the kids were at risk of being removed from the film, but it was decided that they needed to be there because having just pacha as a single guy who lived alone wasn't interesting enough--kuzco needed to go from having basically an empty world where he had nobody to being able to come together with pacha's whole family. and i just think that's incredibly satisfying and beautiful. it also leads up to one of the few things i really do enjoy about the emperor's new school, which is the fact that during the show kuzco moves in with pacha and chicha and pretty explicitly thinks of them as basically his parents while he's like a son to them.
idk. i feel like my mind went in a million different directions while i was writing all this. but i guess i just think that for all of the praise the emperor's new groove gets for its comedy and for how hilarious yzma and kronk in particular are as a duo, the movie also has a lot of genuine heart that gets overlooked. kuzco's character growth and his unique dynamic with pacha is, for me, really what elevates the movie from just a funny movie that i like to one of my favorite disney movies. and i wish more people appreciated that aspect of it and saw it as a found family story in the same way that treasure planet, brother bear, and lilo and stitch are all found family stories.
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kakujis · 1 year
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do you love me?; 4
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synopsis: they wake you up and ask if you love them. 1 2 3
ft + wc: mistuya, draken, chifuyu. 3k.
warnings: gn!reader, swearing, miscommunication, workaholic bfs, tipsy chifuyu, slightly spicy in drakens! not proofread! thats it LMAO
a/n: hi. it's been a while! i took a writing break and i'm not sure if this means my writer's block is over, but here's the fourth and probably final part of this series (this is a lie im probs gonna write more when s3 comes out LMFAO) anyways, similar themes for mitsuya and draken, while chifuyu's is extra fluffy. the extra fluff was added in for @fuyuluvr btw.
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mitsuya takashi has been busy. more so than ever, you’ll find him buried in his work til the early morning hours. this happens every time he’s hit with inspiration for a new runway collection and you often wind up feeling neglected. but mitsuya will always find a way to sneak time with you in, even if it means playing model for a little bit. 
his love comes out through his finger tips, when he’s laying the garment over you, light touches over your skin. it comes out in the way he silently works, looking you over every so often, smiling when he notices the way you furiously blush when he lingers for just too long. 
but this time is a little different. his fatigue clear on him when he crashes into the bed, mumbling a sleepy “good night” to your “good morning.” it’s jarring, how separate the two of you feel in the shared space of your home. 
mitsuya realizes something is wrong the first night you tell him you don’t want to model for him. “it was a long day… i’m just tired.” you had told him, hesitating before you placed a kiss on his forehead. you left shortly afterwards, leaving mitsuya in his office. 
the second night you barely touched your dinner, pushing your food around on the plate absentmindedly. when he asked if something was wrong, you told him that you weren’t hungry with a strained smile on your face. “don’t worry about me.” 
the final piece locks into place the night you push him away from you when he tries to sneak a kiss. “not now,” you said, unable to look at him, “my breath smells.” you both know it’s a pitiful attempt at a joke, but when he tries to pry, you ignore him. lavender eyes trail after your form, noting the way you bend into yourself as you walk, closed off. 
mitsuya’s always allowed you your space and this time is no different. except for the fact that he can’t focus at all, too distracted by the guilt gnawing on his bones. he has a deadline to meet, yet he can’t seem to care when his partner is upset with him. 
he removes his glasses before running his hands over his face. he mulls over the apology in his head, before he’s up and heading toward your bedroom. when he arrives, he kneels at your side of the bed, one hand caressing your cheek to rouse you from sleep. when you blink almost awake you’re met with his pretty face, guilt etched into his features. 
“taka..?” your voice barely louder than a whisper, you fight against the heaviness of your eyelids, the inherent need to see him reigning over the lull of sleep. you love him after all. 
“morning angel,” he starts, dragging his thumb over the curve of your cheek. “i’m sorry.” 
you open your mouth to speak, but mitsuya presses a finger against your lips, shaking his head. his silver locks move in tandem, his eyes peeking underneath them as he focuses on the hardwood floor. it’s hard for him to remember what he wanted to say, being in front of you much different than the scenario rehearsed in his head. at the end of the day though, mitsuya is a man of his word, whether it’s to you or himself, he’ll see it through. 
he steels himself, looking you straight-on as you blink at him, one hand placed over his. “i’m really sorry.” he reiterates, “for neglecting you. i’m also sorry for not noticing sooner. i shouldn’t have asked you to model for me when i’ve barely spent any time with you… i’m just.. sorry.” 
“can i speak now?” you ask, squeezing his hand and he nods. you push yourself up onto your elbows, before placing your hands on his shoulders. “i’m sorry for being selfish.” 
he shakes his head, “you’re not selfish, don’t say that. i mean, i could say the same thing right?” 
your expression is somber as you respond, “takashi… it’s your job, hon. it’s always been like this, it’s not like this is your first collection either.” 
but mitsuya can read you like a book, remembering that with each disagreement, you’ll hide your feelings in favor of his. he knows when you break eye contact, looking away, that you’re not saying what’s really on your mind. 
“do you love me?” he asks, before running his finger under the curve of your jawline. when you nod, he tilts your face back upward, forcing you to look at him, “then be honest with me.” 
“o-okay…” you sigh, “i hate your job.” 
he grins, “that was brutal.” but he still nods, urging you to continue. 
“i hate your stupid deadlines and i hate when you’re super busy, because i want to spend time with you. and also, i miss you all the time and by the way, that stupid runway coordinator called your cell and when i answered they hung up immediately! that’s so unprofessional! like, you should be grateful i even answered the damn phone! right?” you huff once you finish your tirade, your feet kicking up and down in annoyance. 
mitsuya can’t help but laugh once you’re done, it’s the most animated he’s seen you these past few days. he likes it. 
“don’t laugh!” you pout, puffing your cheeks out and your boyfriend has to bite back another laugh. 
“no, no, you’re right, how could they hang up on my partner?” he agrees and your face softens. “but damn, i didn’t think you hated my job that much.” 
you gasp, freezing for a moment, “ahh, well it’s not like i hate it-“ 
“you just despise it?” he quips, one eyebrow raised, interrupting you. 
“no!” you exclaim, continuing to pout. but you feel lighter, like a weight’s been lifted off your shoulders. 
“you feel better?” he asks, taking your hands into his and pressing a kiss to them. 
maybe the two of you didn’t exactly solve the problem, but that’s fine, you can never stay upset with him for long. 
“a little bit.” you say, before tugging him upwards. “you know what would really make me feel better?” 
“hm?” he tilts his head, eyes soft. 
“if you cuddled with me.” you respond, tugging at him just a bit harder. 
he smiles as he climbs into bed, “as you command, my dear.” 
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draken: 
sometimes, you think ryuguji ken would be better off moving into his bike shop. you don’t mean to be bratty, really, but you can’t help it. the countless nights of him coming home late have been taking a toll on you. it’s been worse since inui’s taken some time off which means draken and shinichiro need to take over, which means less time with your boyfriend. 
you check your phone one more time for the daily goodnight text, but when you see none, you quietly turn your phone off and close your eyes to try to get some sleep. 
but it hurts, like the prick of a thorn or the sting from a wasp, but you know when draken’s busy, it’s best not to bother him. still, you can’t help the tears that bubble up, spilling over like the flood of a dam as you hug yourself, burying your face into your pillow. when you finally settle, you hope he won’t notice puffiness of your eyes when he comes home. maybe he’ll keep the light off, you hope, as you drift into a deep sleep. 
when he finally gets home, smelling distinctly of motor oil, he tries his best to stay quiet, borderline tiptoeing his way to your shared bedroom. as he changes out of his dirty clothes, his eyes naturally trail to your sleeping form. there’s something off. 
if there’s one thing about draken, he can pick up on every subtle shift of your mood. after all, draken knows you best. 
he knows he should probably shower as you hate the smell of the oil and grease, but his body moves towards you anyway. he turns the bedroom light on before he climbs onto the bed, grabbing you and shaking gently. 
“baby?” he calls, watching as your face scrunches up.
“hm? what is it?” you murmur, a little irritated, but you let him turn you over anyway. 
“were you crying?” he asks and you force your sleepy eyes open. concern paints his face as he cups your cheek, “what happened?” 
“nothin’,” you lie, staring at his chest rather than his face. “i’m just tired.” 
“and your eyes are swollen just because?” he cocks a brow, already onto your little lie. 
“yep.” you quip, before pushing his hand away and sinking into your pillow. “it doesn’t matter, kenny.” 
“except it does,” he replies, moving down with you, “what happened?” he asks again and part of you feels like maybe it’s time to answer. until you remember the big race mikey has coming up, which makes you decide to keep your mouth shut. 
draken sighs, “alright, i won’t pry.” he stays there in his dirty clothes, yawning as he stretches and lays back, eyes closed.  
you scrunch your nose. “kenny… aren’t you gonna shower?” 
“yep.” he says, in the same tone you gave him earlier. 
“… and when are you gonna do that?” you press, silently thinking about the laundry you’re going to have to do later. 
“when you tell me what’s wrong.” he answers, head leaning back against the headboard. he peeks an eye down at you, smirking at the incredulous look on your face. “what? i said i wouldn’t pry, not that i wouldn’t wait. take your time.” 
“and if I decide I won't tell you anything all night?” you ask, slightly sitting up.
“like i said, take your time.” he shrugs. 
“you’re …insane.” you scoff, laying back down. you pull the blanket over you, back to him.  
“nah, just patient.” he corrects and the  two of you fall into another uncomfortable silence. 
for the next few minutes, it’s completely quiet and you think draken may have actually fallen asleep sitting up. but when you turn around, you meet his eyes, soft yet concerned. you know that he cares, it’s the essence of your relationship. so maybe, just this once, you could let him know. 
hesitantly, you open your mouth to speak. “if i asked you to spend less time at the shop and more time with me… would that be okay?” your voice is low, quiet, and unsure. 
instead of answering, he asks,“do you love me?” and you find yourself confused. 
“huh? that doesn’t-”
“just answer the question.” he interrupts. 
“yes, of course i do.” 
“then why wouldn’t it be okay?” he asks, pulling you into his embrace. “i didn’t have to pick up the extra shifts if you didn’t want me to.”
“and leave shin to die from overworking?” you joke, but in actuality, it is a ton of maintenance work. 
“why not?” he smirks and you laugh. “ah! there it is, your pretty smile.” 
“you stink.” you grumble, pushing away from him. “i’m mad at you.” but your heart betrays you and the pout you try to display is futile as the corners of your mouth curve into a small smile. 
“huh? you talkin’ about me or my personality?” draken quips, but he holds onto you tighter as you continue to try to push off. “don’t go anywhere, angel. you’re comin’ with me.” 
“what? where are we- ah!” you squeal as he gets up, taking you with him. you quickly wrap your arms around him, clinging tightly. 
he smiles, basically beaming and you realize that made you fall in the first place. draken is kind, selfless, even if he may not seem like it at first. he’s always good at making you feel better, even if you don’t tell him. 
“to shower,” he answers, starting the trek to the bathroom, “you keep saying i smell.” 
“i already showered.” you protest, but you rest your head on his shoulder. “but i guess i do smell like car grease now.” 
he stops in his tracks, his mouth pressed into a line. “shit. our bed does too.” 
“should we sleep on the couch?” you suggest and he starts moving again. 
“or we could crash takemichi’s place.” he says, pushing the bathroom door open with his shoulder. 
“and interrupt his precious time with hina?” you muse as he sets you on the counter. 
“isn’t that the point?” he asks, turning the water on before coming to slide between your legs, looming over you.
“what about mikey’s?” you ask, your hands naturally coming to help him take off his work jacket. 
“fuck no,” he groans, letting you turn him around so you can finish taking it off. “he’s gonna try to cuddle with you again.” 
“with us.” you correct and draken rolls his eyes before he shifts out his shirt. he dips down to press a firm kiss to your lips and you smile. “shower time?” 
“shower time.” 
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chifuyu:
chifuyu matsuno curses under his breath as he races up the stairs to your apartment. he’d lost track of time, evening drinking turning into early morning. he hopes you won’t be too upset, hey, maybe he can blame it on baji. 
when he gets home, making sure to walk a little quieter, he peeks his head into the bedroom. the light is left on but you’re asleep. his heart thumps a bit more and a blush creeps onto his face when he notices you’ve fallen asleep in his shirt. 
his steps are light, springy even, as he makes his way over, plopping into bed beside you. you stir in your sleep as chifuyu watches you, his head leaning into his palm like a schoolboy in love.
“fuyu?” you mumble, as you stretch before turning over to face him. sleepy eyes meet pretty green and chifuyu thinks he’s in a dream... or maybe it’s the alcohol that’s still left in his system. 
“hey lover,” he smiles as he scoots closer before pressing a kiss to your cheek. “good morning.”  
“what time is it?” you ask, squinting, before adding, “hi to you too.” 
“like 3am.” he answers and you hum. 
“hm, tonight was that fun?” you yawn, trying your best to fight the drowsiness that's currently over taking your body. 
“yeah,” he replies as another peck flits over your cheek. “wish you went with me.” he thinks about how much fun it would have been if you went with him earlier. how he’d love to walk home with you, hand in hand, sneaking kisses under the moonlight. 
“‘m sorry, fuyu,” you mumble as your heavy lids close, losing the battle. “i’ll try to go next time..” you trail off as your body lulls you back to sleep.
the blond frowns, as cute as you are asleep, he wants your attention now. “oi, y/n. wake up.” he huffs, using his index finger to poke at your cheek. 
when you only make a slight noise, he pokes harder. “wake. up.” 
your eyelids flutter under his touch, but they don’t open and chifuyu sighs. “do you love me?” he whines, loudly. 
you force your eyelids open at the question, he’s cute when he’s whiny so you indulge him. “yes, chifuyu, i love you a lot.” you mumble, before tipping your lips up into his, giving him a soft kiss. 
you realize where the unusual clinginess comes from tonight as he tastes faintly of alcohol. normally, chifuyu would quietly get ready to bed before slipping under the covers to hold you as you slept. he wants you to get your rest and he’s fine with waiting til morning. although, there are some exceptions which almost always include a tipsy, pining boyfriend. 
you giggle when he whines as you pull away.
“stay here.” he grumbles, before he’s cupping your cheeks and kissing you again. 
“fuyu, i have work in a couple of hours,” you mumble between kisses.
“‘m sobering up,” he responds, “if i don’t do this, i’ll get a hangover.” 
“that’s not how it works at all,” you sigh happily, “but okay.” 
and so you let him. you let him kiss not only your lips but your cheeks, forehead, and even your neck. you giggle when he ghosts over a particularly ticklish area, but chifuyu is lost in you. lost in your scent, your voice, your everything. until suddenly, he’s not. 
“fuyu?” you whisper, your arms laced around him. 
there’s no response but the soft snores escaping him as his head is buried in your neck. you can tell he’s asleep by the way his body’s gone limp, the full weight on him bearing down on you. but it’s comfortable like this and you feel sleep beckoning you over. 
when morning and inevitably, the time for work comes, you try your best to move out from underneath him without waking up. the soft daylight pours in through the blinds, casting rays on your boyfriend’s sleeping face. 
you’re close, almost fully out from underneath him when an arm slings itself across your waist and pulls you back in. 
“stay.” he mumbles, voice deep and slightly hoarse from his half asleep state. 
“i have work,” you say, gently. “i’ll be back in a few.” 
“just call off,” he says, tightening his grip on you. 
“chifuyu-“ 
“please?” he pleads, one eye peeking up at you. the blush on his face this time isn’t from the alcohol. 
it tugs at your heartstrings and you give in. “fine. but if i get in trouble you owe me.” 
“you know, the pet shop is always hiring if you get fired.” he wiggles his eyebrows, throwing you a cheesy smile. 
“ha. ha. very funny.” you retort, rolling your eyes.
but the smile on chifuyu’s face doesn’t disappear, he simply tilts his head to press it against yours. 
“i’d take care of you forever, you know.” he says, completely serious and you feel your heart skip a beat. 
“i know.” you mumble back, closing your eyes. 
“i love you, y/n.” he says and you feel the tip of his nose brush against yours. 
“i love you too, chifuyu.” you giggle and he realizes he wants to listen to it for the rest of his life. but he has no ring, he’ll need to remember to get your ring size. 
“forever and ever?” he asks, his own heart fluttering to the timbre of your voice. 
“forever and ever.” 
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BABE!! Tan for sure is the kinda guy to open your car door, pull your chair out for you etc, BUT imagine that you’re not used to that?? And so kinda keep doing it yourself, before Tan gets to? And he always lovingly scolds you for it?
OK SO NOW!! Imagine calling him when you’re drunk, asking him to pick you up, and suddenly he learns that you’re kind of a brat when drunk?? I FEEL LIKE HE’D LOVE THAT, like suddenly, you’re stood by the car door, waiting, chin raised and happily clearing your throat to signal to him to open it 😭 and he’s melting bc you’re finally not so darn independent and you let him care for you!!! (He also finds it hilarious) (also, you’d totally get him to take your heels off for you)
AAAAAGGGHHH OMG!!! love love it!!
this also disappeared right after I posted it??? idk what’s going on!!!
TANGERINE WITH AN INDEPENDENT READER.
omg omg this is so eldest daughter coded!!!!!!!!! (self indulgent but idc)
and you're independent and used to doing everything yourself, yup yup I see the vision. and also maybe not used to chivalry sooo..
— so like when you go do dinner/ have date nights out, you pull out your chair before he can even reach it (also the same for opening car doors, or doors in general) he just tsks at you, shaking his head "that's my job" or "what did I say?" bc he's told you so many times
— and when you're walking and you're on the outside (closest to the road) he puts a hand on the small of your back and guides you to swap places and says "what did I say?" (that's gonna be a running theme/ repetitive saying btw) 
— and when he drops you home after going somewhere he gets out the car to walk you to your door, you're like "I'll be fine. you don't need to do this" and he’s like “would you just let me be a gentleman” and he waits until you're in and he hears the door lock before he leaves
— he holds bags for you and dismisses your protests of carrying them yourself, he's all like "how many times have I gotta tell you?"
— AND so?? you're out with friends and you're drunk, you call him to pick you up. you give him your bag immediately, silently handing it to him with no reaction, not a smile or a glance, nothing. and he just squints at you bc you've never done it before
— and then when you're walking to his car, you have an arm around his back as he helps keep you stable (you're a bit sloshed btw) and bc he's so focused on getting you to the car, he forgets that he's on the inside of the pavement, but you don't. so you're like "swap. im meant to be that side" and he's kinda loving it bc it seems that all the things he's been trying to ingrain into you have finally worked 
— when you get to his car, you're waiting for him to open it for you, arms crossed, tapping your foot, and you'd slur something like "sometime today would be nice" and he's just so entertained and amused by it all!! he's like "you're right, sorry. I'll be quicker" so you reply with "that's what I thought" and he just does one of those low chuckling snickers bc he’s loving it a lot more than he thought he would
— and then when you sit in the car, your twist to pull your legs out before he can shut the door. and you lift a leg and say "my feet hurt" making him take your shoes/ heels off for you. and he's just so whipped and he crouches down to undo them and he's just holding under your heel AARGGHHHHH. "better?" is def something he says. and "'little miss precious' tonight, you are"
— AND THEN just as he's about to shut the door you say "wait" and he's like "what?" and you say "seatbelt. it's not plugged in" hinting for him to do it. so he grabs it and reaches over you to plug it in, and kisses your cheek before standing up straight. then finally he gets in the car to drive back
— he's loving that you're finally letting him help you, even if you're drunk and have no real control over yourself. he reminds you the next day about what you did, and you're embarrassed, like "no, I didn't. you're making it up. I would never do that" and bc he's sweet, he's like "yeah, you're right. just pulling your leg" and he pretends his teases were a lie BUT THEY'RE NOT. HE'S JUST SAVING YOUR FEELINGS
— ALSO JUST BC I LOVE IT SO MUCH if you say “I can do it by myself” he says “I know you can. but let me help you” 🫠
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buddieism · 2 months
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tommy's character, bucktommy's inherent flaws, tommy & eddie as mirrors and buddie endgame; a (lengthy) meta analysis
honestly, what's really confirmed my feelings about tommy (and the imminent bucktommy bones -> buddie pipeline) is that there have now been multiple opportunities for the writers to actually make tommy a likeable/serious love interest for buck and they just…haven’t. because while fans are naturally going to overanalyse every little thing, the vast majority of the show's audience are regular viewers who consume the show at face value and don't think twice about it -- so if tommy was intended to be buck's endgame or anything remotely close to it, they'd absolutely want to make the most of his (very limited) screen time to present him in the best light they could. think about karen, the only non-main LI, and how she was introduced to us -- despite hen's cheating, we can see how dedicated karen and hen are to each other and how karen is a complex character in her own right who is immediately easy to root for and love.
comparatively, when we look at tommy's s7 appearances and specifically his interactions with buck, it becomes abundantly clear that there isn't really much depth to their relationship at all. which is fine! it's just... you know. fine. let's get into it.
following the cruise arc, we watch tommy through buck's eyes in 7x04 where he's basically wining and dining eddie -- flying him to vegas, getting them front row tickets to a fight, sparring with him in muay thai, playing pick up basketball with him -- tommy and eddie are so similar (which we'll come back to later), and we even get that line from eddie about how well they "click." as the audience, we are being subconsciously told to align tommy and eddie together -- and furthermore, we are told that tommy can easily make grand gestures when he wants to. now let's compare that to the bucktommy moments of the season.
bucktommy's first date: tommy makes a shady comment that would have outed buck if eddie or marisol caught onto it and then proceeds to abandon him on the sidewalk because he thinks buck isn't "ready" for a relationship with a man
i'll be objective here -- i understand in a show like 911 there's always going to be "unnecessary" relationship conflict for the sake of drama and i can also see how buck trying to play off their date as platonic to eddie might have put a bad taste in tommy's mouth. but we hear from tommy himself that he struggled with being open about his sexuality when he was at the 118 so he could have absolutely extended some sympathy towards buck for not wanting to come out on the spot to his best friend -- especially when tommy fully knows how important of a role eddie plays in buck's life. at the very least, he didn't have to leave buck alone on the curb. this isn't me trying to woobify buck because yeah, he's a grown man, he's fine -- but that doesn't mean it still isn't a bit of an asshole move.
the bachelor party: tommy doesn't dress up for the theme and dismisses buck when he's clearly disappointed about him doing so
tommy showing zero interest for the bachelor party buck planned is practically the writers waving a massive red flag in front of the camera -- him having to leave because he's on call is an understandable 'conflict' plot point but why not have him show up in an 80s themed outfit? it wouldn't have changed anything except that he and buck would have had a positive interaction; buck would have been happy that tommy cared enough to make that small gesture and it could have been a cute way to establish their relationship as one built on mutual effort. (btw, the bucktommy hospital kiss could be seen as a big gesture, sure -- but from a more practical viewpoint knowing how rushed this season had to be, it was also just an easy way for buck to "come out" to the rest of the 118 without having to spend too much episode airtime on it.)
the medal ceremony: tommy says 'enjoy it while it lasts' (which, LOL) and also is not shown reacting to buck receiving his medal. he also has a conversation with henren in a deleted scene.
again, i'm going to try to give tommy the benefit of the doubt -- i'm not saying he has to be sunshine and rainbows all the time and i have no issue with a character having a snarky/sarcastic side. but when his screentime is so minimal, every line of dialogue matters. and it's pretty damning that the writers aren't taking those few chances to give us something to appreciate about him. with buck, tommy makes a dismissive comment for literally zero reason, and with hen and karen, who are rightfully looking out for their friend, tommy refuses to take them seriously at all.
bucktommy's dinner in the finale: buck displays some vulnerability about losing bobby, and tommy... really doesn't seem to care.
honestly i refuse to rewatch this part of the ep because it really icks me out on another level but iirc: buck says he's glad bobby's okay because bobby is like the father he never had -> tommy says "your father's alive" -> something something joke about daddy issues. ignoring #that joke entirely, it's really insane to me that they have tommy even acknowledge the nuclear bomb that is buck's relationship with his parents. yes, we had a bit of a ham-fisted 'redemption arc' in s6 but that doesn't negate the buckley parents being absolutely heinous and the fact that buck verbalises how bobby played the role of the father figure because philip didn't -- all for tommy to basically deny that to his face -- is absurd. tommy has expressed on multiple occasions that he's jealous of the 118 family bond, so this line is just... very interesting to me.
now, let's recap all these events and bring eddie back into the mix!
post-bucktommy's first date, buck is more torn up about the fact that he lied to eddie than the actual date to the point that he has to vent to maddie about it. he then comes out to eddie, who is incredibly supportive (and oliver and ryan make some very curious acting choices indeed). eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.
pre-bachelor party, eddie is the one to suggest he and buck dress in matching (queer-coded) costumes. he then stays by buck's side at the party when everyone else leaves and although we'll never get to see it (tim minear i'm inside your walls👹), they sing an absurdly romantic karaoke song together. eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.
during the medal ceremony, when the camera pans to each member of the 118's love interest/family, it is eddie we are shown smiling at buck, not tommy. this is especially interesting considering we get buck reacting to tommy. i honestly can't get over how a reciprocated tommy reaction would have been an easy yet significant moment to cement bucktommy as a relationship, but they gave us eddie's instead (with chris in the background and marisol conveniently obscured, mind you). eddie is reiterated as one of buck's most significant relationships.
in the final episode, when eddie is experiencing his personal worst nightmare, buck is the one at eddie's side every step of the way. buck talks to christopher, buck reassures eddie (without judgement), and it's made clear that buck will be there for eddie, whatever he needs.
at every possible opportunity, we the audience are being implicitly told that eddie is buck's person. he is his place of support (buck having his more vulnerable coming out scene with eddie rather than his sister); he has buck's back (the bachelor party); he is his family (medal ceremony reaction), and ultimately, this goes both ways (finale).
some other things worth noting: when buck has his coming out scene with maddie, she tells him he's confused about his feelings in a way that seems to indicate she's talking about his feelings towards eddie ("if you there's something you need to tell eddie, you will"). in bobby's conversation with buck in the firehouse, he's verbally supportive of tommy and even asks if buck is going to see him, but buck goes to eddie's house instead. these were deliberate choices made by the writers; eddie has been consistently intertwined in bucktommy's relationship both overtly and subtextually throughout the entirety of s7. and let's not even get into the whole 'evan' thing, because that could be a whole other post in itself.
from the first moment we start to learn about tommy's character (beyond his... coloured past), we find out that he and eddie are practically mirrors. why not make tommy and buck share similar interests? why not give them something to bond over? why present tommy and eddie as almost identical in every way? because tommy is a placeholder for eddie. buck's initial bisexuality journey can't happen with eddie when eddie still hasn't come to terms with his own feelings. so, in the meantime, tommy is the "safe" choice in buck's mind because buck has nothing to lose with tommy whereas he's got everything to lose with eddie. buck can't confront what he truly wants yet because the risk factor is far greater and it's been repeatedly asserted that buck has an issue with people in his life leaving -- he would never do anything to jeopardise his relationship with eddie.
but ultimately (and in my opinion, fairly soon), we are going to get that moment where it "clicks" for buck and he realises that it is eddie he has feelings for. and when that happens, there's basically only one way it can go. we know buck can't keep secrets from eddie; we know eddie is going into s8 feeling "isolated"; we know tim loves making his characters suffer before they can be happy. in my mind, the narrative is going to go something like this: buck feelings realisation -> pining buck era -> eddie healing journey and a reevaluation of what buck means to him -> some insane life-threatening situation that really doubles down on how buck and eddie care more about each other than anyone else because it is 9-1-1 at the end of the day -> love confession induced by their dramatic near-death experience -> #BUDDIE_CANON !
when we factor in how there was a possibility of eddie having the sexuality arc this season instead, how tim has said buddie is one of his favourite dynamics of the show, and how supportive both oliver and ryan are of the ship, i really can't see how everything isn't building to buddie endgame. every other main pairing of the show has had seasons of development, of conflict, of bonding moments. buck and eddie have gone through that with each other time and time over (tsunami/lawsuit/shooting arc etc), which is why every other random love interest that's introduced for either of them falls flat in comparison. they quite literally are exactly what the other person needs; buck wants the stability of a home, a family, and unconditional love; eddie wants someone he can trust, a caretaker for his son but also a partner. buddie is the ship the audience wants to root for, because we know they work! now that we have canonically bisexual buck and eddie finally having to face his complicated feelings about losing shannon, buddie isn't just the logical conclusion -- it's the inevitable one.
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venusgirltarot · 1 year
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What Would Your Person Think Of Your Fantasies (18+) — [♡]
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Disclaimer: This reading is for entertainment purposes only. Tarot readings are about possibilities based on your current energy. Energy is forever changing and nothing is set in stone. Always remember, you have your own free will to make whatever decision you feel is best.
Close your eyes, take a deep breath, envision the person you are thinking of and then choose the pile(s) you feel most drawn to.
This is an 18+ reading with sexual messages and mature themes. Please do not interact with this post if you are a minor or are uncomfortable with NSFW readings/messages!
If you would like a personal reading from me, you can get one here!
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Pile 1 ┊ ༑ ࿐ྂ。
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oooo okay so there’s a lot of very deep intense energy here. You all may have a lot of Scorpio placements (specifically Scorpio Venus 👀) you may want your partner to be dominant and possessive and you could also be into kinkier things like bondage, choking and possibly even spit. It’s less of the act itself for you and more the way you’re giving this person all of the control and trusting them with your body in a way you wouldn’t trust anyone else.
Are you all on booktok? This gives me such spicy booktok vibes. Some of you may not even have a person in mind, you just wanted to check out the reading. You may have standards that are “too high” (I wrote it like that because I don’t believe in too high of expectations. Go get the booktok partner of your dreams and don’t let anyone stop you) do you like tattoos? I keep seeing a person with a sleeve. Maybe you also have a hand/arm kink. Boobs are so prevalent here so maybe you have larger boobs or just really nice/pretty ones and you like when they are payed attention to or the other way around, maybe you really like boobs and pay a lot of attention to them during sex.
Ok, Pile 1
This person has a HIGH drive and they will love your kinks/fantasies. They may not be familiar with all of them but are more than happy to learn. I heard “you always have something new for me” 😭 ooo girl (I mean that in a gender neutral way) this energy is INTENSE. I heard “they wanna be all in your business” and “they LOVE you” they could be a single parent for some of you. They’re very responsible and take a leader role in all areas of life and do have a very… I’m gonna be honest, I have no clue what I was going on about there because I just got a very detailed image of their ARM which is such a nice arm btw and they’re behind you doing it from the back but they have you like bent over the edge of the bed and they have a handful of your hair and they are VOCAL like not just dirty talk but a lot of moans/grunting. This scenario would be reversed depending on what parts your equipped with or what you’re into because I do feel like there’s going to be a few male or male identifying people that pick this pile! Also I just remembered that before this, I was about to say that they have a very “daddy/mommy” sort of vibe. I hope that makes sense.
I think as long as they have control or get to be more dominant and take care of you, they’re down for any kink you have. Like I said before, they’re very dominant and possessive. They may say “you’re mine” or “that (body part) is mine” ya know. I also just heard “as long as I get all of you” and aftercare is very important to them. In and out do the bedroom, they care for you a lot and want to take care of you and your needs.
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Pile 2 ┊ ༑ ࿐ྂ。
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Okay so I think this could be a more diverse pile. For some of you I think you like for your partner to worship you. To sort of treat you like a god/goddess in bed and you want them to he desperate to please you. You really like receiving oral and I think you like giving as well but you like very desperate/needy sex. You may like incorporating food or maybe you like to eat after sex. For others I think you may like having a submissive partner. You may be the type to listen to whimper audios. A large portion of people picking this like could be apart of the LGBTQ+ community. Some of you could like feet (no judgement, one in ten people actually like feet so you’re definitely not alone) you may like oil. I just heard that Cardi B quote “suck my sick and feed me grapes” 😭
This pile is so different so it’s hard to put it into words but I’ll start with the first category of people and then next I’ll go into the second category.
So first category, I don’t think you’re really a “dominant” person but you like being in control. You like telling your person how to please/touch you and you like when your person is desperate/needy or vocal. You like when your person makes their main priority please you and you especially love them giving you oral. You may have taught them exactly how you like it so they give it to you perfectly every time and oral seems especially important in the morning. You may like soft/gentle sex that’s very deep and passionate and you’re not done having sex until you’ve came and that’s equally important for both you and your partner. Some of you might like whips/collars but this could also be me picking up on the second category of people that picked this pile.
Your person loves this dynamic and they love pleasuring you. They specifically love your moans and the way your body moves when they go down on you. They may enjoy giving you massages and possibly giving you baths or having a bath ready for you. They love being inside you or you being inside them and they love how connected it makes them feel to you. They love kissing your body and they love how you look covered in oil (although they may get frustrated when it gets slippery or difficult) if you have boobs, they love massaging them and they really like kissing between your thighs. They LOVE when you give them oral and they think you’re very good at it but they wish you would do it more often. More than anything, they love the intensity and passion between the two of you.
Second category
For the second category, you enjoy being more dominant. You like when your partner is obedient and you really like your partners whimpers and the way their body moves. You may enjoy licking their body or teasing/edging them until they can’t handle it anymore and their eyes are watering. You either love being inside of them and how the inside of them feels or the other way around and you love them inside of you and how the inside of you feels or both. You may also really like face sitting/tongue riding and I keep seeing fingering. Similar to the first category, you may enjoy food or oil being incorporated. You may also like or want to get a sex swing and you may enjoy sex in the water or shower sex. You really love and want to worship and take your time with your person’s body.
Your person really loves this. Maybe they haven’t been properly loved or cared for in the past so the way you love them is very healing for them. They feel safe with you and you may be the first person they’ve ever been able to cum with. You’re very good at after care, as well and if you are interested in getting a sex swing, I definitely think they’d be up for it. They feel safe and comfortable with you so they’d be open to trying it and I think you both would really like it. I also keep seeing more fingering so that could be something you’re both really into or maybe the two of you recently had a very good experience with it or tried something new with it for the first time.
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Pile 3 ┊ ༑ ࿐ྂ。
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Okay pile 3, I think I’m getting both you and your person’s energy rn cause you’re very very in tune with each other and wanting the same thing in all aspects, not just sexual. This may be a new relationship or possibly a new beginning in your current relationship after a period of staleness or stagnancy. I keep getting shaky and nervous so maybe this is how you feel about this person.
You want someone who will take control and be more dominant but also that makes you feel safe and comfortable. You want someone that will make sure your wants and needs in the bedroom met. Maybe you’re not as experienced or are still figuring out your wants/needs so you want someone that will explore that with you and not make you feel bad about it. You may enjoy being spanked and you may like handcuffs. Maybe you’ve waited a long time for this or waited a long time for this person so you want this time spent with them to be worth the wait. I heard “everything I’ve wanted and more” you want deep and passionate sex, you want to feel like this persons is completely yours and vice versa. You want this person to explore and genuinely appreciate your body.
You may really want to give this person oral. You want to please them and hear what their moans sound like. You want to see them finish and know that you were the one that did that to them and you like knowing that you’re capable of doing that to them. You want to explore their body just as much as you want them to explore yours and you want to feel all of them. This feels somewhat sexual but also there’s so much this person wants with you. They want you to know that you’re the only person they ever think about, that nobody else compares.
They want to get to know every side of you and they want to get you alone really bad. Maybe you always see each other in public or in crowds of people so there’s no time to connect or get to know you on a deeper level but they want to so bad. They really like your sense of humor but wish they could see more of it. They want to see and appreciate your body. Even if they haven’t seen it, I heard “I know it looks beautiful” their idea of what you look like naked may actually be pretty accurate. They may masturbate to you often.
You may have very soft skin and they really like that. They think of running their hands all over your body. They think about giving you oral. I heard “I wonder how you’d take it” they may be very large down there or vice versa but they fantasize about how you’d take them or if you’d be able to take all of them. They want to be inside of you so bad (or vice versa, of course) more than anything, they want you.
They want you in a way they’ve never wanted anyone else and they want to know who you are at your core. They seem a little possessive on the sense that they want to know you in a way no one else gets to know you and understand every part of you in a way no one ever has. They may want to just cuddle naked or do something where they feel very bonded /connected to you. Possibly cock warming. Maybe that’s something you’re into that they’d be very happy to try. This is a very deep and passionate connection that I heard “will come into fruition” and “just give it time”
I also noticed that I said “so bad” so much during this reading so maybe that’s some sort of sign for someone!
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Hello, lovelies! Thank you all so much for reading this PAC! I apologize for any typos, I haven’t proof read it all just yet. I hope you enjoyed the reading! Feel free to check out my past readings, here
As always, I hope you all are having a good day or night! Sending you so much love and light! ♡
࿐ྂ mara
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haechani4ever · 2 months
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*✧・゚: *✧・゚: ideal dates ✧
╰┈➤ what would be the ideal nct dream date?
. . ⇢ ˗ˏˋpairing ot7 x gn!reader
. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋgenre fluff
. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋwarnings a lil suggestive in hyucks part
. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋnote hii, im so happy with how my last post was received so tysm <3
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✦➼mark lee ┈ listening to music together
✦-surely mark will invite you to do this when you are officially dating. because this date consists in sharing airpords and listen to a random playlist. maybe, he wll he plays the guitar for you or shows you a song he's producing, which I find a little cute of him. but i think that mark will love everything related with the music so he probably enjoys stuff like going on concert together or that you visit him in the studio.
✦➼huang renjun ┈ going to the park
✦- i think renjun is so calm when he's with you. i think he won't care what you guys really do because he likes talking to you more, especially when you're just getting to know each other. so, i think Renjn would prefer to go for a walk in a park or another place of that nature. but i also see him as someone who likes to have picnics in the park but I couldn't decide so I chose that he preferred to walk.
✦➼lee jeno ┈ going shopping
✦-i think, like with renjun, that jeno doesnt care much about what they do to spend time with you. i think he would like to go shopping to spoil yourself a little. he also likes to walk around the place and listen to everything you say cause he loves listening to you and he is a great listener. his favorite part is when you ask him his opinion on something that he has no idea about but he always says he likes it, even if he thinks otherwise. although I dont think that will happen because he knows you have good taste.
✦➼lee donghyuck ┈ amusement park date
✦-this was very obvious, im pretty sure that hyuck loves this type of date. dates with a lot of fun adrenalin. probably he will take you here for your first date. and im sure that this it's going to be a place you guys go to frequently when you two are in a relationship. so be prepared to a lot of ride roller coasters instead of him. and be prepared to hear him scream a lot, really a lot and being very loudly in general.
✦➼na jaemin ┈ cat café
✦- jaemin is a cat lover so, unless you are allergic to cats, he would love to take you to one of those cafes where there are a lot of cats. this is so cute im dying. its just that its something so right for him, two of his favorite things in the world, cats and coffee. and a third, you, obviously. so yeah, it is definitely his dream date. extra points for him to like it if you take it or give him the idea btw.
✦➼zhong chenole ┈ karaoke
✦- chenle is someone so energetic and fun that he would really lpve this type of date. i think its a date they could have at any time of your relationship, meaning it works as a first date or a casual outing when you are dating. likewise, all the dates would end in some kind of karaoke because, i mean, chenle is a great vocalist and he loves to show it off. when you are in private, he intersperses some song every 20 words.
✦➼park jisung ┈ themed café
✦- maybe it sound similar to the jaemin one, but its dont. have you seen those cafes on tiktok where they paint or decorate cups while drinkng coffee? well, that's what I mean, original dates in original places. he probably also likes those places where you make those things with ceramics. i see jisung like someone who doesnt like the usual, he seems like someone who likes to create special memories by ding stuff like this with you.
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things in IWTV season 2 i'd lose my mind if it actually happens (or when. because some of those things will happen.). sorry for the mistakes btw
1. Claudeleine romantic relationship
Claudia finally having a vampire lover she can be herself with. the romantic & sexual tension. the heart to heart Louis and Claudia would have before changing Madeleine. the yearning. the tragic ending. the change of dynamics in the De Pointe du Lac family. the disruption of it all.
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2. an exploration of Armand's relationship to religion, faith and God
specially in 2022. past religious crisis. how he articulates his vampire nature, his faith and his despair. lots of hints of TVA. God and art. religion, Armand and Louis. his religion (conversion from being christian to being muslim in this universe? if so, why?). "i serve, a God," would you mind to develop?
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3. dramatic irony about Daniel's past and Devil's Minion
the rent boy. Daniel actually realising he had been a dick about that. "oh." after understanding the irony of it all. Armand talking in riddles and hinting at something Daniel is totally ignorant of. young Daniel's life and messy, loving and weird relationship with Armand. some activism. 2022 Daniel getting old, sicker and sicker. laughs. angst. tension. yearning. longing stares. petty remarks. revelations.
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4. Loumand complex relationship
the love and the suffering. how they are both deeply attached to each other. how they show their care. the place Lestat holds right in the middle. how they deal with Claudia's death. what Louis really thinks about it. the tension. the yearning. how their relationship actually developed. the extent of Louis' memory alteration and how it plays a role into their dynamics. the after: how Armand helped Louis. messy divorce vibes. petty moves. to what extent their relationship is doomed. how one person can love several persons and in different ways, and how complex and delicate it is.
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5. The Groan™
what is that. a metaphor for sexual arousal? Lestat scratching the walls? Rashid trapped? some clues. what the fuck.
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6. Antoinette alive and kicking
and coming back right on time for the trial, because it would be 1) so fucking funny 2) utterly tragic, considering Claudia would be killed for killing nobody.
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7. amazing outfits
amazing outfits
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8. lots of french
i'm french
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9. Claudia and Armand's relationship
Claudia being protective of Louis. Armand dealing with it. some sort of bond rivalry. both of them aware that something's wrong with the other. Armand and Claudia's similarities being acknowledged (age, killing a human they loved — Charlie, Ricardo — and complex situation regarding their maker), even a possibility for some kind of understanding and compassion (making the end more tragic). Armand seeing a some of Lestat in Claudia. Claudia seeing Armand's love for Lestat. a common love for theater and spectacular shows. that awful experience before Claudia's death.
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10. Louis and memories
the photos he takes (where are they in 2022? will they clash with Louis' tale?). the metatextual dimension of themes such as: unreliable narration, memories and perspective, autofiction. Daniel calling out Louis' avoiding strategies. Louis calling out Daniel's rudeness and biais. how Louis really sees his relationship with Claudia? the gap between Louis' and Armand's recalling. a deeper exploration of his superimposed identities (black, queer, american man; in 1940, 1973, 2022). learning how to trust someone new after being abused. the rain metaphors. Louis saying the most poetic and heartbreaking thing you'll ever heard. his relationship to vampirism as he joins Armand's coven. grief and loss of a family member. hallucinations and how they are filmed / manifesting. guilt. loving Claudia and Armand. loving Lestat, still. etc.
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tysm for coming to my tedtalk. it was very self-indulgent but very much pleasant. i won't be mad if it doesn't happen (obviously!), or not like i imagine. still, it's fun to imagine and put that here on tumblr. no shame on lestat, i just have no special things i'm waiting for about him, and will be very happy indeed to see him again. salut
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themissinghand · 7 months
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Hi you...I hope you have a wonderful day.If you don't mind my request..I want to ask Kim Dokja x sweetheart!reader..The reader is his lover since school (The reader who expressed her feelings for Kim Dokja first.).Before the destruction happened, the reader behaved like a wife to Kim Dokja because the reader knew Kim Dokja's past so the reader gave everything for Kim Dokja to know that he was always loved. (This man needs comfort..).. After the destruction happened, they separated from each other..(Kim Dokja is on the train while the Reader is everywhere.)..Kim Dokja is always worried about the condition of his lover..When they meet again, their meeting is full of romance and fluff after being separated for a long time ..(I bet Kim Dokja's group was the most surprised and the uproar because the Reader and Kim Dokja are very polar opposite.)..The constellation supporting the Reader is also extraordinary..Because the privacy attribute of the reader is also extraordinary..
Thanks for reading..I hope I didn't bother you..I love your work😍..Give you a lot of love💕💕💕..(Btw ,did you read The S-Classes That I Raised or not ??..I love Han Yoojin)..Take care of yourself..Bye dear author 🥰..
Omniscient Reader Viewpoint: Fool
Summary: In which Kim Dokja is a fool for you.
Or snippets between Kim Dokja and his wife in an apocalyptic world.
Pairing: Kim Dokja x F! Wife! Reader
Note: Thanks for your patience! I’m also currently reading The S-Classes That I Raised Manhwa, but not the novel! The holy trinity with Han Yoojin, Kim Dokja, and Cale Henituse are literally my favourite trio. 
Warnings: Minor novel spoilers! Lots of kisses, fluffy, but also light angst, and implied sexual themes. 
★・・・・・・★
Oh Baby, I Missed You
Where are you? 
Kim Dokja watched what remained of Seoul while standing beside the protagonist of his novel. 
Even after all those scenarios, how come he could not see you even once? 
[The Constellation ‘Secretive Plotter’ is curious about what Incarnation ‘Kim Dokja’ is looking for]
As if on cue, Kim Dokja felt someone’s eyes on him. Spinning around with his hand on his sword, he matched the weariness of the sunfish beside him. 
“Baby!” Hearing a familiar voice, Dokja freezes in disbelief until he hears two blades clashing with one another. 
“Who are you?” Yoo Joonghyk growled at you, who defended well and jumped back. But instead of a blade, you had a long bo staff. 
“Me? I’m Dokja’s wife.” 
“WHAT?!” The door to the rooftop swung open with multiple heads popping through in shock. 
“Is that true Dokja-ssi?” Yoo Sangrah asked, and when all of the attention was on him, Kim Dokja sheepishly nodded. 
“WHAT???? So you and Master-” Jung Heewon immediately covered Lee Jihye's mouth and grinned. 
“Nice to meet you er…”
“(L/N) (F/N). Been Dokja’s lover since a decade ago.” You smiled sweetly, before walking towards Dokja with open arms. 
“I missed you baby.” 
This time, Kim Dokja walked forward and hugged you tightly, and he felt embarrassed when everyone was watching him.
[The Constellation ‘Demon-Like Judge of Fire’ is wiping her tears] 
[The Constellation ‘Demon-Like Judge of Fire’ did not know Incarnation ‘Kim Dokja’ was already taken]
[Many Constellations wishes for your happiness]  
“Baby, can I kiss you?” Kim Dokja flushed at your innocent question, but looking over your shoulder, he saw the wiggling eyebrows and grinning expressions from his teammates. Despite knowing his team would tease him forever, he knew he couldn’t reject your request. 
“I miss you too.” 
Without another moment, you cup his cheeks and pull him in for not one, not two, but three quick kisses. 
[The Constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ jaw dropped]
There were surprised gasps and squeals, and a few hushes from Lee Heewon. 
“No wonder he always looks like he’s looking for something…”
“This is not for children to see.” 
“But hyung is-” 
[The Constellation ‘Abyssal Black Flame Dragon’ gags]
[The Constellation ‘Secretive Plotters’ did not expect a romantic plot]
[The Constellation ‘Demon-Like Judge of Fire’ donates 1000 coins]
[The Constellation ‘Demon-Like Judge of Fire’ is squealing at the reunion kiss]
“You have a lot of constellations following you baby. As expected of you.” Kim Dokja, still a little breathless and dazed from the consecutive kisses, buries his face into your shoulder in embarrassment while you play with his hair. 
He missed this.
He missed you.
“I didn’t know my constellation was following you too.” Kim Dokja perked up at your words in interest.
“Which one?” 
[The Constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ slowly looks away in disbelief]
“No way.” Maybe her long bo staff should have been an indicator. 
[The Constellation ‘Demon-Like Judge of Fire’ looks at the Constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ suspiciously]
[The Constellation ‘Secretive Plotter’ looks at the Constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ suspiciously]
[The Constellation ‘Abyssal Black Flame Dragon’ looks at the Constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ suspiciously]
You smiled innocently as if it wasn’t a big deal, and was just happy to see him. 
[The Constellation ‘Prisoner of the Golden Headband’ pats himself on the back and is proud he has good eyes]
So Don’t Go, Stay With Me
“Do you have to go?” 
“Yea. I have to go find my family. I’ll be safe, and I know you’ll be safe since you have such reliable people around you.” 
You cup his cheeks as you two stare into each other’s eyes lovingly. 
“Message me if you need me, and I’ll come with my nimbus cloud at any time.”
Knowing that your constellation was the Monkey King, Kim Dokja knew you were capable and perhaps on the same level as the protagonist. 
But…
“We can find them together.” 
“Dokja, don’t you already made plans with the sunfish?” He balled his hands into fists. 
“I want you to see the end of that novel you love so much. And I’ll come join you when I’m done. I promise.”
You tippy toe and then press a kiss to his forehead. 
“Baby, trust me.”
Kim Dokja then kisses your cheeks, before you decide to skip the formalities to kiss him on the lips. It was all it took for Kim Dokja to let go, and interlace your hands.
Soft and sweet, Kim Dokja felt loved with how gentle you are with him. He doesn’t want you to go. 
And he will miss you when you are gone. 
Kiss Me Slowly, Show Me You Love Me
Kim Dokja knew you were the one when you jumped after him.
"Kim Dokja!"
When he saw you reach out for him as he fell from that rooftop in middle school.
When you proposed to him on one knee, and kissed his hands as you whisk him away from his miserable reality.
He knew you were the one, when you cried for him, and saved his life, again and again.
“Don’t touch him. Even if you are his mother and my mother-in-law, you have no right to kill him to prove a point.” 
“Move.” 
“Over my dead body.” 
Kim Dokja could barely see you standing before his sleeping body, beside Han Sooyoung, protecting him from his mother.
[The Fourth Wall is shaking] 
“You don’t know anything.” 
“That’s fine with me. I trust Dokja more than you.” In the next moment, he felt a cloud form underneath him, followed by curses and gunshots being fired. 
“It’s you! You’re the one who he loves the most! And you’re going to kill him!”
Feeling your calloused hands on top of his head, he saw many versions of you pop out. 
Was it the duplication skill that the Monkey King had? 
“I’ll break the prophecy because I will never hurt my baby.” 
Kim Dokja smiled faintly, before he lost consciousness again. 
Because Only You Can Kill Me
“Baby, you can’t do this.” 
The world is silent for once. The channel was off and both of you paid the price for such privacy. 
“It’s the only way.” 
“Kim Dokja.” He flinches when you call his full name, you never do.
“I have to. It’s the only way that the story will move on.” 
“There has to be another way.” You purse your lips and rub your temples. 
“There has to be a way.”
Kim Dokja held your hand solemnly. 
“There is no other way-”
“Shut up!” You shook off his hand in anger. 
He knows you know that this was the easiest way. 
“I’m not letting you sacrifice yourself!” 
That’s why you’re angry. 
He hugs you from behind. 
“You’re an idiot for even thinking that, there has to be another way!” You break out of his hold and stare at him straight in the eye. 
“If only I had more power-” Kim Dokja grabbed your hand and placed it on his heart.
“(Y/N), I only trust you. You know that right?” Kim Dokja smiles. 
“You’re the only one who can kill me. No one else can.” He felt your hand tremble as you took a shaky breath. 
“So please…kill me.” 
So the story can go on.
“Don’t look at me like that baby.” You say after short deliberation. 
Finally, with a subtle nod, you conceded with tears rolling down your cheeks. 
Then, without further ado, Kim Dokja pulls you in desperately, and both of you were surprised when he was the first to initiate the kiss. 
But when the two of you are so intimate and so close to one another, knowing that the future is uncertain, neither of you want to let go. 
Please, Make Me Your Everything
Kim Dokja feels so desperate in this apocalyptic world. 
He’s planning and looking so far ahead using his knowledge of the novel, and sometimes, he feels like an outlier. 
Perhaps he is. 
Just like he always has. 
But when he’s in your arms as you plant kisses from his collarbone and trails to his neck, he feels at the center of the world, your world. 
Slowly, he feels you kiss his jawline before going closer and closer to his lips, and feels impatient with how slow you are. Every single kiss tingles on his skin, making him remember every precious moment he had with you.
He will never admit it, but he’s frightened for the future. Not about his death (because he will come back, he has a backup for that), but during his absence. 
You are strong and responsible enough to lead the team, but he was afraid that you were going to take on the burden alone. 
When he finally feels your lips on his, he pulls you closer, treasuring every second of you just like how you make him feel alive everyday. 
“Baby. What’s wrong?” Your fingers gently wipe his tear away as you hold him, and when he feels your tears drop on him, he couldn’t help himself. 
“I’m sorry. I just…” 
“Shh, you don’t have to explain yourself to me. I trust you.” Kissing him on his nose gave him butterflies, but even so, he couldn’t get rid of this bitterness in his heart. 
“I love you. I love you. I love you so much.” Dokja repeated the same words until his voice croaked and his lips became dry.
All the while you ruffled his hair and massaged his scalp, and responded to each of his confessions with affirmation. 
“We’re gonna be okay, and you’re gonna be okay. I’ll wait for you Baby.”
That night, Kim Dokja cried himself to sleep in your arms, and for the first time in a long time, he felt warm, secure, and well-rested. 
So when he feels his own sword pierce through his heart painlessly by the one who he swore his eternity to, he feels just as safe and happy. 
You catches him as he falls, as you cry silently and reminds him to come back soon. 
“Don’t forget me, please.” 
How could he? When you’re the one who chose to move forward with the story, when you’re the one who will face his team after their reckless plan?  
He was already greedy and selfish, wanting you to never forget him and wait for him, however long that may be.
Kim Dokja is a fool.
An idiot that only makes you cry.
With a strained smile, he nods before noticing the notification above. 
[Incarnation ‘Kim Dokja’ will be killed by the person he loves the most]
When he wakes up, he promises that he will never sacrifice himself again.
But the story must go on.
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