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#bucky barnes x gender neutral
fixforthesoul · 7 months
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OPEN LETTER TO FANFICTION WRITERS ON ACCESSIBILITY; PLEASE READ.
first of all, thank you for spending your time, seldom acknowledged and definitely deserving of a compensation you are not receiving, to entertain us. i’m speaking on behalf of more than just blind readers, but everyone. you’re sick as hell.
i’ve summoned you to provide some information you may not already know. i know a lot of you like fonts. especially those who cross post their work on wattpad. i admire any and all acts of aestheticism to a degree, and can understand the desire to use them. (blind folk, sorry y’all. momma’s making a point.) 𝔰𝔱𝔲𝔣𝔣 𝔩𝔦𝔨𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔰, it’s cute. 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 is a little cuter to me, if i had to choose. or maybe 𝓈𝑜𝓂𝑒𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈?
now, sighted folk: if you’re on mobile, i implore you to participate in a little exercise for me. select this text and scroll through all the copy/paste/define/‘search the web’ options until you get to the speak portion. if you need to change a setting for your phone to do so, would you mind? i’d really appreciate it.
please make your phone read aloud part of my post, and be sure to include any bits with those super cute fonts. 𝕚’𝕝𝕝 𝕥𝕒𝕔𝕜 𝕠𝕟𝕖 𝕠𝕟 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕖𝕟𝕕 𝕠𝕗 𝕞𝕪 𝕡𝕝𝕖𝕒, 𝕣𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥 𝕙𝕖𝕣𝕖. 𝕚 𝕙𝕠𝕡𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝕚𝕤 𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕟𝕤𝕝𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕔𝕠𝕣𝕣𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕝𝕪, 𝕚 𝕕𝕠𝕟’𝕥 𝕨𝕒𝕟𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕝𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕠𝕟 𝕥𝕠 𝕓𝕖 𝕤𝕢𝕦𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕖𝕕 𝕓𝕪 𝕥𝕪𝕡𝕠𝕤 𝕚 𝕔𝕒𝕟’𝕥 𝕤𝕖𝕖.
whether you participated and discovered it for yourself or you thought this was a crock of shit you’d rather not sniff, i’ll tell you! screen readers cannot dictate words using those fonts. at least, on a majority of devices. not mine, or any of my mutuals elsewhere.
you do not have to change your behavior on my behalf, but please be aware that fonts limit access to your work.
blind readers do exist, i exist, and i am bound by the same feelings of dogged longing that make other sad horny bitches read angsty, smutty, father-wounded nonsense.
thanks for making it this far. i really hope my sincerity is being conveyed, reading makes me so happy and i’m not the only person on this app who relies on accessibility settings more often than not. do with this information what you will, and have the day you deserve!
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queerpumpkinnn · 9 months
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Two Doors Down
2.5k words
Summary: Your vibrator dies mid-session, so your roommate offers to help you out.
Pairing: Roommate!Bucky Barnes x reader
Warnings: smut obviously, dom/sub dynamics, brief use of a vibrator, brief dry humping, cunnilingus, slight hair pulling (bucky receiving), pet names (sweet ones like honey, baby, etc. but also some on the more degrading side),scratching (bucky receiving), a healthy dose of degradation, nipple play, finger sucking, unprotected piv sex (wrap it before you tap it), creampie, dumbification, slight edging but if you blink you'll miss it, let me know if I'm missing something!
While listening, I recommend you listen to enemies to lovers - a Spotify playlist by me!
~
"God fucking damn it!"
Your frustrated curse echoed off the walls of your bedroom, followed by a dull thump of your vibrator falling on the mattress. You sat up begrudgingly and flopped over the bed, reaching for the charger and plugging in the toy.
You huffed, sitting on the bed for a few moments before tugging your shorts back on and standing, leaving your bedroom to go explore the great unknown: your apartment.
The sound of the television was more audible when your door opened, the white and blue lights from the TV tinting the entire living room and kitchen area in a cold glow. While your eyes needed a second to adjust to the change from the dim, warm light of your room, Bucky, your roommate, was staring blankly at the television, listening to the newscaster droning on while sifting through a bowl of cereal with a spoon.
You didn't greet him, despite the tiny alarm in your head telling you it was bad manners. You stomped past him, headed for the fridge to find leftover pasta. Once a bowl was heated up, you stomped around over to the couch, flopping down beside him.
Bucky raised a brow. "You doin' alright?" He asked through a mouthful of cereal.
"Yeah."
"Then stop stabbing your pasta."
You looked down to see your fork digging into the bottom of the bowl, spearing through the noodles with more aggression than was necessary.
"I'm fine."
"Wanna tell me?"
Your mind raced just at the thought of his suggestion. "No. Nothing's wrong."
"Ah." He turned back to the television, one leg crossing over the other. "Thought it might have somethin' to do with your vibrator dying on you."
You nearly choked, head whipping around to watch him incredulously. "How-"
"TV ain't on that loud." He snorted.
You buried your face in your palms, cheeks warm. Bucky only laughed at your mortification.
"Hey, it's all good." Bucky waved a hand in dismissal, you caught it as you lifted your head. Your gaze somehow got stuck on it, specifically, his fingers. The thought of them on you made the heat in between your legs flare up again. You could practically feel them tilting your chin up, tugging your hips closer, prodding into your cunt...
Bucky seemed to notice your sudden interest, looking between your eyes to his hand and back with curiosity. He let out a soft 'ah', a grin of delight splitting his face. When you finally clocked in on his understanding, silent but knowing, you looked down in what was definitely the least subtle way possible.
"Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I can't remember a time when hands didn't get the job done."
That didn't help your embarrassment, and for some reason you continued the conversation. "Well, I can't get the right angle..."
Bucky exhaled, passing his tongue over his teeth. "Tell me to shut up if I've got the wrong idea. But I have hands." You peeked out from your hands. He wiggled his metal fingers slowly as if to prove the obvious. "I think you've noticed."
All of the thoughts you'd wrestled with moments ago came flooding in again. Sparks of excitement shot down your belly, and you swore your heartrate doubled.
You attempted to keep an even voice, but nonchalance definitely escaped you for the timebeing. "So... what's your point?"
You were terrified you might have misread the situation. That this excitement would die down and you'd be left wanting him. You needed him to tell you.
"My point is," Bucky uncrossed his legs, turning to face you and leaning forward. "That I'm offering to do what your vibrator can't."
You were shivering with excitement, voice shaking as you sighed,
"Please."
Bucky stood slowly, pushing off of the couch with his hands. His gaze was fixated on you, bordering on ravenous as he eyed you up and down. He relished the way your eyes followed his, and as a result, when he finally towered over you, he was met with a sight that made his cock throb.
You could feel your head turning cloudy, anticipation bubbling in your stomach as you peered up at Bucky. A single, metal hand came up to your chin, stroking slowly over the bone. Your eyes fluttered, leaning into his touch.
"Poor thing." Bucky tutted, shaking your head side to side a bit. "So pitiful. Can't even get off right, needs a toy to get the job done."
You whimpered when he used his grip on your jaw to make you nod yes.
"Shh, you're okay. 'M right here, gonna take good care of you. Yeah?"
"Yeah," you replied weakly.
"Good." Bucky let go of your face, opting to sit on the couch instead, legs spread wide. He patted one of his thighs, gesturing with the other. "C'mon, take a seat."
You crawled over him, hands resting on his shoulders tentatively. Bucky traced a finger up the column of your throat, sending a shiver down your spine. The pressure on the underside of your jaw brought your gaze upwards.
"Gonna need you to keep your eyes on me, dove, think y'can do that?"
You nodded slowly, itching to move but frozen in place by his attention.
"Good." Bucky's hand was a whisper around your throat, quickly finding its home again on your jaw. His thumb swiped over your bottom lip, to which your mouth fell open oh so slightly.
His lips quirked in amusement. His thumb pressed down, earning your jaw lowering further. Two fingers slipped past your lips to settle on your tongue and you happily took them, one hand coming to hold his wrist in place while you suckled.
His free hand began rising up your hips, and you straightened your posture at the feeling, almost tickling. They descended just after his thumb grazed your lower chest. You gasped around his fingers, and his subtle raise of brow made your cheeks heat.
You squeezed his wrist, and it moved from your mouth to your waist. Hands reaching for the back of his neck, you tugged him forward into a sloppy kiss.
Bucky wasn't sure where the line was before. He understood that he had struck a purely sexual deal offer, so kissing for some might be too intimate an exchange under those circumstances, but Christ did he love the feel of your mouth on his. The clash of teeth and spit, your soft moans swallowed up into his own mouth sounding like heaven. Even more so when he sucked on your tongue, pride coursing through his veins when you squeaked.
And oh, you just couldn't help it, when you started rocking your hips back and forth. It was his fault really, teasing you so much.
"So fuckin' needy, angel, just can't wait, huh?" Bucky groaned, head falling back for a minute before jerking back up. "Need to get you taken care of, isn't that right?"
You nodded pathetically, brain long turned to mush. Your senses, every atom in your body was on fire and so, so sensitive, but your head was empty.
And Bucky knew it.
Which is why he lifted you up, strong hands supporting you under the thighs, which wrapped around his torso to keep you up. Bucky groaned, the feel of your legs around his waist sending blood rushing to his cock.
It was a messy trip to your room, to say the least. Bucky had to stop multiple times in the hallway to press you up against the wall and stick his tongue in your throat, rutting into you and breathing heavy into your mouth. His groans were pure sin and you wanted to pull as many of them from him as you could.
Bucky set you down gently, but as you laid, he remained, towering over you with hungry eyes and bated breath.
"Look at you," Bucky grazed his metal fingers over your cheek. "So fuckin' needy, hm? So desperate, you just hop on the first dick you see."
His words didn't even register, not when his leg was pressed right between your legs, so you nodded along dumbly.
He chuckled, almost a bark of a laugh. "Lucky I'm here to take care of you, hm?"
"Yeah," you sighed, your feeble grip on his shirt attempting to tug him closer. "Please, Bucky, need you to take care of me, please..."
"Alright, alright, I've gotcha." Bucky leaned in, pressing wet kisses to your neck whilst his fingers slipped under your shirt, grazing feather-light over your nipples. You could feel him smirk when you arched into his touch.
"Can we take this off, baby?" His voice was soft, and you nodded, pulling your hands up so he could bare your chest.
Bucky gave a groan at the sight, his mouth traveling downward to press licks and kisses over your chest. He pressed his palm over your ribs, indicating you to lie back. Bucky followed, propped up on his arm. His other hand walked up the inside of your thigh, making you shudder into him.
"Buck, please," you breathed, eyes rolling back.
"Nuh uh, none of that." Bucky's hand was quick to reach up and grasp your jaw, this time with more force. "Eyes on me."
He nodded your head for you. He maintained a more intense stare as he moved, slowly and deliberately, down between your thighs. He watched you as he kissed up and down your thighs, pressed his thumb into the junction between your cunt and your leg, pressed a firm kiss to the area just above your clit. Your hips jerked up, following his touch.
"I know, I know. Bein' so patient, so proud of you." Bucky purred, tugging your bottoms down in one go. "And would you look at that, no underwear. God, you're soaked."
Bucky actually moaned at the sight, like the idea of going down on you was pleasurable for him. And Lord, was it.
He started with, for lack of better word, toying with you, thumbs pulling your lips apart to watch your slick web from them. Even though he wasn't watching your face anymore, your eyes were glued to him. His fascinated expression, his strong arms holding your legs apart, his toned back rippling under every movement- somewhere along the line he had lost the shirt; you couldn't remember when but Christ was it better he did.
You nearly levitated off the bed when a finger came to collect your slick onto your clit, followed by lips attaching to the nerves and tonguing over it lasciviously.
Your hesitancy to make noise had gone out the window the minute his mouth was on you, jaw falling open to let out your sounds of bliss. The only thing keeping your head from falling back was the sight in front of you; Bucky was pure sex incarnate. His head swayed back and forth, groans and muffled praises vibrating against your skin, hair tickling your thighs.
"Taste so damn good angel, so fuckin' wet." Bucky tugged you impossibly closer- you swore you saw his hips moving into the sheets. "Should let your vibrator die more often."
Your breath had all but escaped you, coming out ragged and whiny. Your hands reached for his hair, tugging at the roots softly- harder when he groaned louder, sending both of you into a frenzy.
"Fuck, Bucky, right there, fuckfuckfuck-" your noises, if even possible, got louder when the man under you found just the right spot to prod his finger. It slipped in so easily, the wetness helping you welcome him in.
It didn't take Bucky long to figure out where that spot was inside of you, pulling moan after gasp after cry of his name once he bullied his fingers into it just right. He repeated the motion until there was a sheen of sweat on your forehead, grasping onto his hair, his arm, whatever of him you could find as if he was your lifeline.
"Oh, just like that, so close Buck..." You kicked your hips up into his face, rolling them for any kind of friction you could get- friction he was elated to give you.
You nearly sobbed when he pulled his face away from you, fingers leaving your pussy feeling unbearably empty.
"I know, honey, I know. Gonna give you something even better, hm? Gonna give you my cock, fill y'up real nice."
You almost drooled at the sight of Bucky sat up, nothing but sweats being hastily pulled down until the bulge fell heavily over the band. He kicked his bottoms away to some forgotten corner, stroking himself languidly a few times, kicking his head back.
You whined a bit at the lack of attention, thighs pressing together. That seemed to have alerted Bucky, as he tilted his head back down to face you. "Sorry, sunshine. Won't keep you waitin' any longer, yeah?"
Bucky lined himself up with you, teasing your sopping entrance with the tip. However, when your legs hooked around his waist, just like before, all notions of control were lost on him as he sheathed himself inside of you. A guttural groan, more sensual and more animalistic than before, ripped through him and sent sparks shooting into you. He stretched you deliciously, the friction electrifying.
"Don't fuckin' clench, holy shit- not gonna last long," Bucky huffed, rocking slowly into you. He was leaned over your body, almost folding you in half so that he could mutter filthy praises into your ear, tonguing at the shell of it lightly.
If he wasn't gonna last, what could be said of you? Your orgasm was approaching fast, if your throbbing cunt and frantic moans were any indication.
"There we go, y'gonna cum? Fuckin' cum for me, honey, make a mess on my cock, go on."
White-hot pleasure drowned you as you scratched faint pink lines down Bucky's chest. This time your eyes screwed shut, but Bucky chose instead to help you ride out your high, pistoning into you until he let himself go, filling you up in a way that left you feeling warm and full and very, very satisfied.
Only the sound of yours and Bucky's panting could be heard in the room, the air suddenly thick and musky with the smell of sex.
After a moment, he pulls out, murmuring 'shit' to himself a few times. "Gonna get you cleaned up, 'kay?" Bucky pressed a kiss to your temple, picking his boxers up on the way to his ensuite bathroom and coming back with a rag a minute later.
"Feeling alright?" Bucky asks. "Didn't hurt you, did I?"
"No, you were great." You huffed, a stupid hazy grin tugging your lips. "Bit thirsty, that's about it."
"Noted," he mused. "I meant it, by the way."
You cocked your head. "Meant what?"
"You should let your vibrator die more often. I'm just two doors down, and I reckon I know a few more tricks than that piece of junk you've got." He gestures to the vibrator, which had fallen onto the floor at some point.
You definitely made sure to keep that in mind.
~
Bucky Barnes Masterlist
Marvel Masterlist
Main Masterlist
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pixiexdusts-world · 19 days
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Incorrect Quote
Natasha: So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Bucky recently.
Y/n: No, Natasha, it's not what it looks like, I swear.
Natasha: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?
Y/n: No! You’re the only one for me.
Natasha: Is that so?
Y/n: I promise! Bucky and I are just dating, okay? They’re my partner.
Natasha: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?
Y/n: You are still my one and only best friend! They’re just the love of my life, nothing more!
Natasha: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?
Y/n: Of course bro!
Natasha: Bro...
Bucky: What the-
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talesofely · 4 months
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The (Wo)Man Who Can't Be Moved
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Pairings : Natasha Romanoff x GN/Fem!Reader
Summary : Natasha's your ex-girlfriend, she broke up with you without giving you a solid reason as to why. Obviously, you want her back. One problem, she's unofficially dating Bucky Barnes. So you decided to solve it with a little performance.
Warnings : Angst, Fluff, Hopeful Ending (?), Swearing I think, reader is mostly gender neutral but i envisioned it as a fem!reader soooo, pls tell me if u see anything else
Note : I rlly wanna make a part 2 of this, lmk what u guys think thooo
Word Count : almost 2k
Save My Tears - Part 2
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Tony decided to host another one of his famous Stark parties. This time, his excuse was that you are single again, and that Natasha and Bucky had something going on. What he didn't know was you and Natasha didn't quite end in good terms, cause she broke up with you. And of course... that you still miss her so god damn much.
So there you were, in your room, mentally preparing yourself to see the love of your life with her soon to be boyfriend. You didn't want to go, you absolutely wanted to just run away. But you couldn't. You had to show that the break up didn't affect you as much as they thought it did, even if it really did.
A knock on your door pulled you out of your thoughts.
"Come in." The door opened and revealed a redhead. You smiled sadly at the woman, it wasn't your redhead. It was Vision's.
"I told you I'm fine, Wands." You tried your best to give her a genuine chuckle. Wanda didn't seem to be convinced though.
"You look good, L/N. Trying to impress somebody?" Wanda said as she leaned against the closed door of your room.
"You already know the answer to that." You said as you shook your head, standing up to apply perfume.
"Just tell her, Y/N/N. I mean, you should shoot your shot before it's too late. I heard Buck's gonna ask her to be his girlfriend officially tonight." Wanda announced, watching you intently as you try desperately to calm your nerves.
"What am I supposed to say, Wands? Please take me back, I miss you so much, I know you broke up with me but I want you back?" You sarcastically said as you scoffed. "Plus, I don't wanna ruin what she has with Bucky. She must like him so much if she made their relationship public within three days of seeing each other."
"She isn't happy with him, and we both know that. I care about Natasha too, Y/N, I want her to be atleast happy with who she's with. Plus, how can you know she doesn't want you back if you haven't even asked?" Wanda asked with a raised brow. You didn't dare to make eye contact, just staring at the perfume bottle on your hand. "Think about it, alright?"
Wanda left your room, leaving you alone with more thoughts than you had 30 minutes ago.
Stark decided to go to the next level for this party. He had a stage in the middle of the living room, a bunch of speakers, and a mic stand.
The party was more lively than normal. Everyone was teasing the future couple, much to your annoyance. Natasha and Bucky were the center of attention.
Apparently, Bucky loves getting all that recognition and attention, but deep down you know Natasha doesn't. Your ex-girlfriend loves parties, but she doesn't like it when she's the center of attention. Bucky doesn't seem to know it considering he's showing her off like she's just a trophy.
You sat at the bar, alone, drinking your Aunt Roberta cocktail. Clint approached you, Tony right behind him. You didn't acknowledge them, just continuing to watch the 'It Couple' as Tony calls them.
"You okay, Y/n?" Clint asked with a small smile. You're guessing he didn't know what happened, you didn't know if Natasha told him how she broke your heart. You just nodded in response, drinking down the last of your cocktail.
"They're such a nice couple, right? Natasha and Bucky? I'm not glad you and Nat broke up but I'm glad they found each other." Tony said with a grin, oblivious to the fact that you want to punch him in the face.
"Mhm." You responded with another nod. You couldn't do this sober, but the alcohol wasn't doing anything.
"Hey, Y/N, you should sing! You have a great voice, right!? You used to sing for Natasha when you were still together!" Tony slurred out, obviously intoxicated now. Clint nodded in agreement, both trying to convince you to sing.
You didn't want to, you weren't in the right mood to put on a show.
However, when your eyes drift to Natasha and Bucky slow dancing to your song, 'Wonderful Tonight' by Eric Clapton, the same song you two always danced to, you snapped.
You cleared your throat to steal Tony and Clint's attention. You stood up and fixed your suit's jacket. The polo you were wearing underneath had three buttons unbuttoned, showing just enough for men and women to go wild.
"I'll go sing, Anthony. The tablet beside the mic is connected to the speakers, right?" You asked as Tony nodded eagerly. He always liked it when you sang, saying you had a specific vibe he couldn't get from other singers.
Before you could fully walk away, Clint shouted at you, making you turn around and raise a brow at him.
"Go get your girl back." He mouthed then winked. You rolled your eyes at him before flipping him off.
When you reached the stage, Steve got off and handed you the mic with a smile. You sat down on the chair, everyone was surprisingly cheering for you. Mostly everyone's eyes were on you, excited for the song you were about to play.
You didn't dare to look into the audience, in fear of meeting those green eyes you used to call home. The fondness in them wasn't for you anymore, anyways.
"Hey, everyone. I hope y'all are having an amazing night. I do hope you enjoy these songs I'm about to play." You said as you clicked the instrumental version of the song you chose, on the tablet.
Going back to the corner where I first saw you
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move
Got some words on cardboard, got your picture in my hand
Saying, "If you see this girl can you tell her where I am?"
(Italics are flashbacks)
Three days after Natasha broke up with you, you decided to drive to a park where you two always went on. You sat on the exact bench where you asked her to be your girlfriend. Not a lot of people walked by, it was a slightly secluded area.
You stared at the lake in front of you, watching as the ducks you always used to feed with Natasha swim towards you. One duck in particular, the one you named Nibbles, the one you considered your child, approached you and stood on your foot.
You smiled sadly at him, caressing his fluffy head.
"Hi, Nibbles. Your mama isn't here, I'm sorry. We won't show up together anymore, buddy. I still promise to visit, okay?"
People were giving you weird looks but you didn't care. You just gave the duck a piece of bread that he dipped in the lake before waddling back to you so he could eat it beside you.
And how can I move on when I'm still in love with you?
You met those green eyes while singing the particular line. You couldn't read it, it had too many emotions for you to decipher. You saw her smile faltered though. You gave her a small bittersweet smile as everyone around you was singing along to the song and nodding their heads to the beat.
'Cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
And your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
"Where the fuck is Y/N, Wanda?" Natasha asked, barging in the younger redhead's room.
Wanda's head snapped to her door. She saw Natasha was holding the letter you left in her room over and over again, memorizing every sentence. A few tears escaped, but she immediately wiped them away. She saw how the 'Love Always, Y/N.' was smudged, like it got wet from a teardrop.
"What do you mean, Natasha? I thought you knew she left. She's gone, Nat. She left for a no-contact mission, even Fury doesn't know when she'll be back." Wanda said flatly, standing up to kick Natasha out of her room.
"Why'd you care anyways? Miss her?" Wanda said sarcastically with an eye roll.
"She didn't tell me." Natasha murmured, stepping out of the room.
"Why would she? You broke up with her, remember?" With that, Wanda closed the door to her room, making sure to lock it.
Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on the corner of the street
You walked around the park, even walking the streets where you two would 'window shop' but you end up buying her everything she looks at. Your feet stopped when you saw the familiar ice cream parlor on the corner of the street.
You remember taking her there on your first half-anniversary, right after you two finished a mission. The mission was rough, it didn't physically hurt any of you but it did take a toll on your mental states. You wanted to cheer her up and distract her so you made up an occasion to convince her to go eat ice cream.
Policeman says, "Son, you can't stay here"
I said, "There's someone I'm waiting for if it's a day, a month, a year.
Gotta stand my ground even if it rains or snows
If she changes her mind this is the first place she will go"
Your eyes met Steve's and he gave you a small smile. He remembers it too.
It was your first winter without Natasha. You were sitting on a swing in the park right in front of the compound. No one else was there except you cause it was cold and snowing really hard.
You felt someone sit on the swing beside you. It was Steve. He gave you a small comforting smile, nodding his head to greet you.
"You can't stay here all night, Y/N. It's cold, you should come in." He said in a low voice, trying to stay as casual as possible.
"I'm fine." You said, giving him an unconvincing smile.
"You're still waiting for her?" He asked. You looked at him but he was staring ahead.
You nodded timidly. "Always."
There are no holes in his shoes but a big hole in his world
"You're my world, Natasha." You murmured into her hair. You were cuddling in bed, her head on your chest.
She looked up at you, her ethereal green eyes staring up at you, filled with adoration. She smiled, that same smile that never fails to make your heart flutter no matter how many times you've seen it.
"I love you, детка." She whispered as you leaned down to press a soft kiss on her lips.
"I love you more, my Natalia."
Going back to the corner where I first saw you
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move
When the last note ended, some were clapping, some were silent and looking at you in worry. You furrowed your brows, realizing a tear was currently rolling down your cheek.
You saw Clint giving you two thumbs up while Wanda was smiling sadly at you. You tried looking for your redhead, but you couldn't see her anywhere. Even Bucky wasn't there.
You bit your lower lip, trying to control your emotions. Did they leave together? Were they currently having the time of their life in Natasha's bedroom? Did Natasha bring Bucky to the rooftop like you two used to? Why did she leave?
You sighed and decided that you're going to take her absence as an answer to all your questions.
She moved on.
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its-really-dry · 1 year
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EXTREMELY cute quote incoming.....
nat: *smiling like an idiot*
tony: whats got you all giddy up romanoff?
nat: y/n/n called me, her widdle natoffee
tony: ????
y/n: *runs in* ITS A COMBINATION BETWEEN TOFFEE AND NATASHA!
tony: wha-
y/n: also, its bc tasha is sweet like candy AND she small as hell. so........ widdle natoffee! *kisses her nose*
nat: *is now blushing*
tony: but natasha's taller than yo-
steve: *smacks tony* let them have their moment
sam: *in a news repoters voice* this is just in! big bad independent black cat widow assassin lets her happy-go-lucky golden retriever gf call her "natoffee"
bucky: woah. im surprised she didn't kill you!
wanda: she's in her "im so in love rn idk how to function" faze. she'll be back in an hour or so
nat: *shoves her face into y/n's neck*
y/n: *whispers* my widdle natoffee romanoffee
tony: OK NOW IM JEALOUS
5K notes · View notes
Text
A Day in the Life...
Fandom: Marvel (Actor AU)
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader
Summary: You're hired to be famous actor, Bucky Barnes' social media manager. This is probably the best and worst job you've ever gotten because Bucky gives you free reign of his social media but also...you may or may not be crushing on Bucky aka your boss. Based off my imagine here.
A/N: this is 3,180 words because i refused to break it up into parts. anyway, ENJOY!
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You press record and begin to narrate, "A Day in the Life of a Social Media Manager for a Super Big and Popular Actor *Working Title*"
You face the camera to you and continue to speak, "Bucky had some morning meetings but I wasn't allowed to film. So now here he is doing his daily workout."
You pan the camera to him and he says, "Hi," with a shy smile.
You snort, stopping the recording, "What?"
"This is..." he gestures to you and your work phone, "awkward."
"Then don't make it awkward! And hey, you said I had free reign! I asked your followers what they'd like to see and they say they want a glimpse of your daily life."
His brows furrow, "Didn't you just say this is a day in the life of a social media manager?"
You shrug, "The poll was tied to seeing your daily life and my daily life working for you. So I just decided to put the two together. Anyway, the title is a work in progress. We'll see how this does and go from there. Anyway, just ignore me. I'm not even here."
Bucky gets back to his work out. He has an outdoor and indoor set up. Because the weather was nice, he decided to do his workout outside...shirtless.
He goes to the lifting station, picking up some weights. You begin to narrate again, but this time in a Steve Irwin impression, "Right. Now watch as the esteemed actor gets ready to work out his arms in preparation for an awesome movie that I'm not allowed to mention."
Bucky lets out a chuckle, dropping the weights and looking back at you, "You filming a nature documentary now?" he rests his hands on his hips and smirks at you in a way that makes you want to melt.
You give a playful yet dramatic sigh, dropping your filming arm down, "Are you this difficult with your directors, Barnes?"
He shakes his head, "Nah. None of my directors have been as dorky as you."
You stick your tongue out at him, "Fine. I'll leave you to your workout."
"No, hey, I was joking! Don't leave me!"
You shake your head, "It's fine, Bucky. I'll leave you to it. I'll chalk up some other videos we could do. Also, the getty images from last night's premiere are up. Did you want to look through them before I post?"
He shakes his head, "I trust your judgement." he turns around, his bare back facing you. You stay and watch as he do a few arm curls and immediately rush back into his home.
"Get it together, Y/N," you mumble to yourself, leaving your boss to his workout.
________________________
During Bucky's fitting for New York's Fashion Week, you were allowed to take some behind the scenes pictures. You have a few candid ones of Bucky standing in front of a mirror, his stylist fixing his collar, and him looking at the different shoe options.
Then you included some goofy ones where he copies a pose of a mannequin, a selfie of you two showing of your shoe choices (his being very fancy and yours being your regular sneakers), and then a selfie of him wearing a pair of sunglasses without a lens.
You posted all of them after fashion week was over and his Instagram followers were LOVING it.
bbarnesfan: STAHP. he's so adorable.
xbucky-muncher: he went from serious to dork. get you a man who can do both.
notyouraveragebuckyfan: ok but him and his social media manager are so cute together???
bbarnesfan replies: they're literally bucky's employee. don't be weird.
notyouraveragebuckyfan replies: i'm just saying! they seem like they have great chemistry! have you seen the tiktoks and reels of them together?
"How come you put the candids and the selfies all in one post?" Bucky asks as he looks through the latest post you made.
You're scrolling through the analytics of the last tiktok you two made, one where he guesses if one of his characters said a specific line or it's made up.
You take note of the demographics, the comments, etc. to be mindful of for the next posts you make.
Without looking up from your laptop, you answer, "It shows people the different sides of you. How you take things seriously but you can also have fun with it."
He hums, "Lots of people think we look cute together." He says this in hopes of getting some sort of reaction from you.
You continue to work, not looking back at them, "Don't pay attention to those comments. The internet will make up all kinds of stuff."
Bucky's shoulders sag a bit as he replies, "Yeah. You're right."
You'd been working for him for almost a year now. He doesn't see you every day like he did when you first were hired on. Now you only come over twice a week to go over analytics with his team and to shoot some content. Most of the time, you work from your place and Bucky's been feeling more lonely ever since.
Your presence brightened his day and you provided a breath of fresh air on his busier days. He genuinely enjoyed your company and liked making content with you. He liked learning more about you, having meals together, and just being with you. He thought that maybe there was something there between you, but then he'd be reminded that you're his employee and he's your boss. It can't work out.
But there were some glimpsed of hope. You'd look at Bucky a certain way or make a comment that seemed a little more flirty. It had to mean something, right? But whenever Bucky tried to push a little more, you'd pull away and he hated it. It was so complicated.
He wanted you as more than an employee but his team clocked him on his feelings and told him not to fuck it up because you've helped Bucky's image immensely.
He can't fuck this up, not matter how much his heart yearns for more.
___________________________
"Hello, hello!" you greet Bucky, handing him his coffee as he lets you into his home. You've been working for him for over a year. It's one out of the two days you come over to do work with him.
His stylist, Michael, was nice enough to bring some clothes over for a TikTok video that you had which was "My Social Media Manager Picks Out My Next Event Outfit".
The next event that Bucky needs to make an appearance in is his friend, Nat's, movie premiere. The dress code is very formal so it's no surprise to see various kinds of formal wear.
What does surprise you is that you see a rack of clothes that you know wouldn't be for Bucky.
"Um...what's this?"
He grins widely at you, "Clothes for you to choose from."
Your brows shoot up in surprise, "Excuse me?"
"You said you've always wanted to go to one right? You're coming with me."
"As your social media manager?"
"You're not working the event. You're going as my plus one."
"Uuuuhhh..."
"You don't have to, but I was hoping to bring you as, ya know, a thank you for all the amazing work you've done for me this past year."
You can't help but snort, "Bucky, c'mon, did all of your usuals reject you or something?"
"You're the only person I've asked right now. Come on, Y/N, please?"
You want to. You really, really want to. But these past few months, you and Bucky have been toeing the line between a work relationship and something more. You're not sure if going as his plus one to the premiere is a good idea, especially since even more people have been commenting on your chemistry.
But Bucky's looking at you with those gorgeous blue eyes and he's pouting and he looks so cute, so how could you say no?
"I'll think about it," you reply and it seems to appease Bucky because he smiles again and says, "Okay. But I really do hope you'll go. It'll be fun, plus you've met Nat. She thinks you're cool."
You scoff, "There's no way Natasha Romanoff, the hottest and most popular actress right now, thinks I'm cool."
He shrugs, "Everyone thinks you're cool. It's hard to not like you, Y/N, trust me," he gives you a wink and it makes your cheeks warm up, "Anyway, so let's see what we got."
You wordlessly nod, going over to set up your work phone to begin filming.
________________________
You think you did really well with picking out Bucky's outfit. It was a royal blue velvet jacket with a black bow tie, and black slacks. Even Michael was impressed with your choice.
Even though you weren't working tonight, you still took some pictures and clips just in case. You took a video of the reveal of your look tonight and can't help but feel bubbly inside when Bucky wouldn't stop looking at you.
To distract yourself, you decided to take candids of Bucky getting his hair done after you were finished getting ready. He kept making funny faces at you, making you laugh.
After you both were ready, you took some mirror selfies, obviously, and sent them to Bucky afterwards.
You're in the car on the way to the premiere when you get a bunch of texts and notifications from people:
Wanda: I KNOW YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO THE PREMIERE BUT YOU DIDN'T SAY AS BUCKY'S DATE!
Pietro: good luck tonight! use protection! ;D
Carol: since when are you dating bucky barnes???
You unlock your phone but see a notification that Bucky tagged you in a post you didn't know he was going to make.
It was the mirror selfies you two took, with the caption: got the most gorgeous date on my arm tonight.
You immediately turn to Bucky, eyes narrowing, "James Buchanan Barnes."
"...I don't like how you just used my government name like that."
"Why would you post those selfies of us?!"
He shrugs, "Because we look great."
"And the caption?"
"It's true. You're gorgeous."
You groan and pinch the bridge of your nose, "Your publicist and manager are gonna kill me."
"No, they won't."
"They hired me to make sure your online presence is good and won't jeopardize your career."
"Nothing's gonna happen, Y/N."
"People already assume we're together because of how well we work together. It was fine to let them speculate because but that post will make things even worse."
"How?"
"People will think I'm a gold digger? That I got this job because we're sleeping together? I don't know! The internet makes up all kinds of fucked up reasons and I won't be able to get work ever again!"
"But is it so bad that people think we're together?"
"For you, it won't be bad. For me, it could be. So, please, Bucky, delete those photos before even more people see it."
Bucky's jaw clenches and mumbles out, "Fine. I'm sorry," he takes out his phone and you watch as he deletes the photos off his instagram. Tonight was supposed to be fun, but you're sure you just ruined it.
____________________
The entire night was awkward. Bucky did his best to still include you in conversations he had with friends and colleagues, but you felt the tension between you two. You did your best to enjoy it as much as you can. You saw Nat for a brief moment where you hugged her and congratulate her. She said she wanted to chat later but you didn't really expect much. This is her premiere and she has other priorities.
She proved you wrong, however, during the after party where she pulled you to an area for more privacy.
"Hey, how are you?"
"Um, good. A little overwhelmed, but, uh, tonight's been...fun."
She tilts her head and narrows her eyes at you, just like her character did in the movie, and you can't help but let the truth spill, "I freaked out on Bucky on the way here. He posted pictures of us that insinuate we're together and I don't want it to result in me getting fired and potentially never getting a job like this ever again."
"Yeah, I saw that before he deleted it. You guys looked cute. Also, are you two not dating?"
"What? No! He's literally my boss!"
She shrugs, "Could've fooled me. Anyway, there's something clearly going on between you two, right?"
"I, uh, I don't know what to say. Do I have feelings for him? Yes. But will I act on them? No. Again, he's my boss, I'm his employee. I really like this job too, so I can't risk anything."
"I feel like there's a 'but' coming."
"...but he's so amazingly funny, smart, hot, understanding, compassionate, and I just love spending time with him. It's so fucked, Nat.
She nods in understanding, "I know, hon. I'm gonna say the most cliche thing ever, but listen to your heart. I'm sure you'll find another job just as fun as this one, but to be with someone you click so well with? That doesn't come often."
"Hey, you okay?" Bucky comes up from behind, placing a hand on your hip and looking at you with concern.
Nat flashes him a smile, "Just wanted to catch up with them, but I've hogged up your date long enough, Barnes." she turns back to you, "Think about what I said, okay? Enjoy the rest of your night and thanks for coming," she hugs you and heads back out to the party.
Bucky nods to her and stands in front of you, "Did you want to stay longer or are you ready to go?"
"I think I'm ready to go for the night."
"Alright." you follow him out to the front where you wait for the driver to pick you guys up. He stands beside you with his hands in his pockets, wearing that gorgeous outfit you chose.
"I'm sorry again about the pictures."
"Thank you, I'm sorry I attacked you like that."
He shakes his head, "Don't be. I get why you did. But, um, we're good?"
You nod, "Yeah, Bucky, we're good."
"Good," he gives you a shy smile and then points at the upcoming car, "Our ride's here." As soon as the SUV pulls up, he opens the door for you and lets you go in first. He follows and the drive home is in silence.
_________________________
You're working in your little alcove at Bucky's when he approaches you, "Hey, I need to talk to you about something."
You turn in your chair and look up at him, "This doesn't sound good."
"It's good and bad."
"Um, okay?" you clasp your hands together in your lap in anxiousness.
"So...I'm hiring a different social media manager."
Your heart drops, "Wh-What? But-But I thought I was doing well. Your team said I was doing a good job. What happened?"
"You are, but lemme also add that there's another job already waiting for you."
"Bucky, I'm so confused right now. Are you firing me? Or contracting me to someone else?"
"I'm firing you because I can't date an employee."
You straighten up at his statement, "Excuse me?"
Bucky steps closer to you, reaching out and grabbing your hand, "It's just...shit, Y/N, you gotta know how I feel about you right?"
You bite your lip in nervousness, "Maybe."
He lets out a long sigh and run a hand through his cropped hair, "Listen, I like you. A lot. That's the real reason I wanted you to come with me to the premiere. I love spending time with you and I've been so much happier since you've started working for me. To be honest, I didn't know how much longer I could keep myself from wanting to be with you. So to still make sure your professionalism was in tact, I reached out to Nat to see if she was in need of an amazing social media manager and, luckily, she was."
"I'm gonna work for Nat? Nat wants me to work for her?"
Bucky nods, "She does. So you'll be working for her which means I'm not longer your boss. Which means...will you go on a date with me?"
Fuck it. Fuck it all. You held in your feelings for Bucky for so long and now you've been given a loophole to be with him.
"I like you too, Bucky. So much, I didn't say anything, obviously, because I wanted to remain professional, but fuck did you make it hard to not fall for you."
Bucky snickers with a smirk, "I can say the same thing about you." His thumb caresses the back of your hand and it feels so right.
"Have you actually hired someone to take over for me?"
"Not officially, but I have some applicants already. Why? Do you know someone?"
You nod, "I do. She just graduated college with a degree in communications with a concentration in social media. I can have her send in an application, but I one hundred percent vouch for her. She's done great work."
"Alright. I trust you, but I don't think I can find anyone who works as well as you do."
"I fucking hope not. Or else you might leave me for them!"
"Never," Bucky replies confidently with a softness in his voice and adoration in his eyes.
"So...about that date..."
_______________________
"Come with me to work for a popular actor!" Kamala narrates her latest TikTok.
"So Bucky is working on a new movie with Natasha Romanoff so for promo we're filming a bunch of different content!" Nat and Bucky wave at the camera.
"After filming all of that, they're off to a photoshoot. Here are some of the potential outfits they can wear." the camera pans to several racks of clothing.
"There's a lunch break and here's my lunch versus Bucky's lunch," Kamala's plate is pasta while Bucky's roast chicken, "The boss needs to bulk up for another role so he needs a lot of protein."
"And that's all that I can show you for today. Until next time, bye!"
You scroll to the comments and they're immediately flooded with"
you're not y/n???
wait, did y/n quit?! did bucky fire them?! no!
what happened to y/n?!
and so on.
You snort and show Bucky, who was cuddling you from behind, "I told you people would notice."
He peers over your shoulder to look at your phone, "Kamala actually had an idea for that."
_________________
"A Day in the Life of an Actor's Social Media Manager. Part...whatever. So we're doing more promo stuff for Bucky and Nat's new movie. But this time I'm also working with Nat's social media manager, Y/N! We're doing a What's in the Box Challenge and here's a clip of Bucky freaking out."
"IT'S MOVING! WHY IS IT MOVING?!"
"Also look at Bucky and Y/N. They're so cute together. And yes, guys, they're totally dating now which is why Y/N no longer works for Bucky. ANYWAY..."
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lives-in-midgard · 3 months
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Valentine's Day With Bucky
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Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
A/N: Hey everyone! Happy Valentine's Day! 💗 This is a headcanon of how I imagine a Valentine's day with Bucky could be like. I hope you enjoy it!
Masterlist
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Bucky was on a mission and would be back today on Valentine’s Day.
You were currently in the kitchen decorating the cake you baked for today when you heard a knock on your door.
When you opened the door, you had to smile because Bucky was standing there with a big smile, a large bouquet of flowers in his hands and heart ballons in the background.
“Bucky, I told you that you don’t have to make much effort for today.”
“I know, doll, but I couldn’t resist brining you some flowers and I promise we’ll have a wonderful Valentine’s Day even if we don’t go out.”
Since Bucky was on a mission, you and Bucky decided to spend Valentine’s Day at home.
Bucky came in and put the flowers on the table, then he put the ballons in the living room.
After that, he finally hugged you and then kissed you passionately.
You and Bucky went for a walk and when you came back, you and Bucky took a bath together.
Afterwards, Bucky planned to cook a pizza with you.
He had the idea of making it heart shaped.
While the pizza was in the oven, Bucky told you to wait in your room while he decorated the dining room.
He placed candles and some roses on the table and placed the heart ballons at the back.
When Bucky was finished, he came back to you and led you into the dining room.
After dinner, you ate the cake you baked before Bucky arrived.
Bucky loved the cake and you loved everything he prepared.
Then Bucky stood up and started playing a vinyl of 40s music.
He walked back to you and held out his hand.
“Doll, may I have this dance?” Bucky asked like a gentleman.
You took his hand and smiled at each other as you began to slow dance to the music in the background.
You had so much fun dancing with Bucky.
The day ended with cuddling in bed, a movie, soft kisses and whispering how much you love each other.
Bucky and you were so happy together and had such a perfect Valentine’s Day.
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Taglist:
@marvelogic | @eviebuggg | @buckys-wintersoldier | @nicoline1998enilocin | @kandis-mom | @sergeantbarnessdoll | @noellez-best-life23 | @beaubbdoll | @sgtgarricks | @ratchildspartan | @scott-loki-barnes |  @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 | @mrsbuckybarnes1917
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antiquarianfics · 8 months
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Slow Down
An object in motion stays in motion until acted upon by an outside force. In this case, you’re the object and Bucky is the outside force.
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a/n: i’ve been so busy, so this is self indulgent. i work full time, am student teaching, and have my own classes. what’s a moment to breathe?
warnings: none! just your run of the mill unproofed comfort fic.
»»———-———-———-———-———-———-———-««
It had been a busy few months. You had been sent on mission after mission, had to fill out paperwork galore, had to attend a government gala on behalf of the Avengers, and had to fit training in when you weren’t doing all that. So, yeah. Busy.
You’re tired. So tired. It’s the kind of tired that you start to get comfortable with. It seeps into your bones, enters your blood stream, and enters your lungs like oxygen. It becomes apart of you, and you become accustomed to the exhaustion, become able to operate on 4, 5 hours of sleep.
You’re so tired because you’re going so fast, doing so much. You aren’t even aware of how your relationships begin to suffer, how your health begins to suffer. In fact, you don’t even slow down enough to get your bearings until someone stops you.
“Woah, hey, slow down!” Bucky exclaims, his left hand reaching out to grab your bicep.
You skid to a stop, a few steps past Bucky. You turn around a little frazzled.
“Oh, hey, babe! Almost didn’t see you!” You quickly lean up to press a chaste kiss to his lips. “I do have to go, though. I’ve gotta get a workout in before that press conference Fury organized.”
Bucky lets his hands fall to your waist, pulling you close and trapping you in his arms.
“Doll, when was the last time you just took a second to breathe?”
You scrunch your eyebrows together.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean,” Bucky says a little indignantly, “you’ve been busy—really busy. You’re barely sleeping and I don’t think I’ve seen you sit down to eat anything in weeks. I miss you, and I’m worried you’re going to burn yourself out.”
You stare into his face, taking in the worry etched in his brow, the concern in his eyes, and the downturn of his lips.
Then, you take a moment to consider his words. You know you’ve been busy, but have you really not been sleeping? Eating? In fact, when was the last time you really sat down next to Bucky outside of a quinjet? You’re not sure, and when you realize as much, it’s like the glass wall breaks. You feel the exhaustion that had seeped into your bones, your blood, your breath. You feel yourself sag, falling into your boyfriend’s arms.
You let out a deep breath as a few stray tears begin to fall from your eyes. You don’t know what to say, but you know Bucky is right. You’re tired, running on fumes, and now that you’ve acknowledged it, you feel it.
“I’m so tired, Buck,” you admit as he pulls you close against his chest, arms wrapping around you protectively.
“I know, Doll. I know. You’re allowed to rest. You deserve to rest. You don’t have to do everything for everyone all the time,” he assures.
“How about I tell Fury we won’t be at the press conference? There’ll be enough Avengers there; they won’t miss us. And we can watch a movie and order a pizza.”
You nod.
“Yeah, ok. That sounds nice.”
So, you do just that. Bucky cancels your appointments and orders food. He takes you back to your room, lets you shower, gets some warm pajamas for you to change into, queues up the movie, and finally cuddles up next to you on your bed. The two of you just sit together, enjoying each other’s company, making comments about the movie and sharing anecdotes with one another for as long as you feel like. Finally, towards the end of the movie, you feel your eyelids begin to get heavy.
“Bucky?” You call tiredly.
Bucky hums in response, letting his fingers play gently with your hair.
“Thank you.”
»»———-———-———-———-———-———-———-««
ko-fi
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agender-wolfie · 6 months
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Fem is not the default for fanfics and it’s not a woman’s only space. It’s also disrespectful not to tag your shit ☺️
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lana-angel-writes · 1 month
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Winter’s Kitten
Pairing| Bucky Barnes x reader (gender is not really specified)
Summary| Bucky comes home from the market with a very unexpected but adorable surprise.
Warnings| Absolutely none- Just some random cute fluff
Materlist
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Today was a very cold winter day in brooklyn and you had sent bucky out to get more bread from the corner market. It started snowing when he left, which was thirty minutes ago, and it was getting really thick and windy. You were starting to get worried, what if something happened to him? You decided to give it ten minutes until you were going to call him and make sure he wasn’t in trouble. Just as you were about to go to get your phone the door to your shared apartment opened. When Bucky walked through the entry he was covered in snow from head to toe, with a grocery bag in his hand. But what you also didn’t miss to notice was the abnormal lump coming off of his abdomen. “Hey doll, sorry it took me so long, the weathers really getting bad out there.” You stood in front of him speechless did he not think you noticed the now moving lump under his coat. “Buck, what's under your coat?” One thing you always found cute about Bucky was that he couldn’t lie to you. The give away signs were that he couldn’t look you in the eyes, and he’d blush. And right now the big super soldier in front of you looked like a schoolgirl with a crush. “Well, I uh, found her outside on my way back from the market, she doesn’t have a home doll.” As he unzipped his coat a ball of white fluff appeared. “Baby, is that a cat?”,”Yeah.” As soon as Bucky spoke the cat started to move, she tried to crawl up his chest but ended up snuggling back into his arms. Now that she adjusted you could actually see the cat's features,she had big bright blue eyes and tiny little ears.You could now totally understand why he couldn’t leave her behind. She was adorable and the way she looked at you just made you want to melt. “So what do you think of her doll? Can we keep her?” You had no idea your boyfriend could look so innocent, he was giving you the biggest puppy dog eyes with a pout on his lips. How could you ever say no to him or the adorable cat. “Of course we can keep her, Buck.” You couldn’t help but chuckle at the pure excitement on his face and as if the cat knew she had just found a permanent home she jumped out of Bucky’s arms and started to inspect the cozy apartment. After Bucky took off his jacket and boots he pulled you into his arms. “Thank you doll.” Instead of answering him you pulled your head off of his chest to kiss his stubbled jaw. Bucky moved his head down to give you a proper kiss and right before your lips touched there was a loud crash in the living room. "Well I better go check what that was.", "Yeah, I think that's a good idea,Buck."
Later that night when you and Bucky were settled down in bed, he asked “What about alpine.”, “What do you mean Buck?”, “For our new addition to the family.” You loved how easily Bucky said ‘family’ . You felt honored and proud that you were able to keep that special place in his heart.Since Bucky was the one who brought the cat home you thought that he should have the honor of naming her. “I think that's perfect, baby.”
Just after Bucky went to sleep a certain fluffy white cat decided she was going to sleep right on Bucky's chest. You couldn’t help the smile that came across your face, the sight of a man, most are afraid of cuddling with a little cat, was so wholesomely adorable. You were glad that Bucky brought home your new addition to your little family.
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tom-holland-parker · 2 years
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A Good Man
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Summary: When Bucky has a nightmare all he wants if for you to hold him close
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!reader
Word count:  1272
Masterlist
The scream woke you up. You sleepily sat up already knowing the cause of the noise. When Tony had told you there were soundproof rooms he didn’t take into account the air vent that connected your room with Bucky. You’d been hearing it for months but chose not to say anything, not wanting him to feel embarrassed. You spent countless nights wishing you could go to his room and comfort him, but you knew Bucky, he’d tell you he’s fine before you even get the chance to ask if he’s okay.
Tonight was different though, the little voice in the back of your head was screaming at you to check on him, at least knock on his door and ask if he needed something, anything just to hear his voice.
You sighed, trudging out of bed, you grabbed your robe and walked barefoot on the cold tiles towards his room. Listening closely, you pressed your ear to the door in hopes to hear something that would tell you he was somewhat okay but you were met with only silence.
“Bucky” You said quietly as you knocked on the door. Seconds passed before you reached for the doorknob, surprised when you noticed it was unlocked. “Bucky I know it’s late I was just checking to see if you were-”
There he sat, in a messy pile of blankets and pillows on the floor. The tears on his face were visible due to the moonlight that lit the room. His head shot up to look at you, “y/n” he said as he quickly looked away from you in hopes that you wouldn’t see him crying. “What are you doing up?” His voice was barely above a whisper
You bit your lip as you tiptoed into the room, shutting the door behind you before walking towards the bed where you sat on the edge. “I just wanted to check on you and make sure you were okay”
You watched as his shoulders slumped and he stared at his hands, “Did I wake you?” the sadness in his voice broke your heart.
“Yeah” You whispered quietly as you moved to get up from the bed. You didn’t have to look at his face to know he was even more disappointed with himself. The urge to hold him close was overwhelming as you slowly moved to sit next to him, “Do you want to talk about it?”
You placed your hand gently on his back, feeling the thin layer of sweat that covered his body, “Or not, I can leave if you want me too”
He stayed quiet, enjoying the feeling of your hand moving up and down his back, “ever since Steve left I’ve had this recurring dream that I’m losing control again” he paused, twiddling with his fingers, “I’m just so scared that I’ll lose all the progress I’ve made and end up hurting everyone again”
You bit your lip, watching as he moved to face you. The look of fear and sadness in his eyes made you want to cry, “I’m just so scared that I’m not a good man."
You pulled him close, his head resting on your chest as your arms wrapped tightly around him. "Bucky" Tears began to fall from his eyes, wetting your shirt as he broke down. You stay quiet, your hand rubbing his back soothingly.
The room went silent after a few minutes, your hand continuing to rub his back. You looked around the room, noticing how everything except the tiny pile of blankets you were laying in seemed untouched, as if no one had lived in it. You frowned at the idea of bucky feeling out of place in his surroundings.
“I’m sorry” His voice was quiet as he moved away from your embrace, “I woke you up and now I'm basically unloading my baggage on you, that’s not fair. You should go to bed, I’ll try to keep quiet”
“Bucky, you’re my friend and I love you and I’m not going to let you go through this by yourself. So,” You got up from the floor and walked over to the closet, “You’re going to change your clothes, I'm gonna put some new sheets on the bed and we’re going to lay down” 
5 minutes. That all it took before Bucky was back in your arms, both of you laying in bed as your fingers gently ran through his hair, “You know I only joined the avengers because of you” You confessed in a whisper
“What?” he lifted his head slightly to look at you, "that's not true, you're one of the smartest people on the team they were practically begging to get you on" 
You chuckled moving your body to be face to face with him, "yes they were begging but for the longest time I didn't want to come" 
Bucky stayed silent waiting for you to continue your story, "I had done so many bad things in the past I never thought that I could do any good with my life. And then one day Steve Rogers comes knocking on my apartment door begging me to hear him out" you smiled at the memory, "so we're sitting down in my kitchen and he's telling me stories of his best friend Bucky Barnes who stuck by his side every moment as kids and always put people before himself. And he told me all about the torture you went through and how even after all the bad you did that not a day goes by that he doesn't see the same person he saw back in the 40s. The same person that would stick up for the scrawny little guy no matter how bad the situation was" 
"I didn't know he saw me that way" Bucky whispered, tears forming in his eyes. Your hand moved to caress his face. "After I spoke with him I thought to myself if someone still had the chance to be a hero even after all the bad maybe there was a shot for me"
"You're the first person besides Steve who made me feel comfortable here" Bucky said in a hushed tone, as if he was sad to say it, "everyone was sort of okay with me because Steve said they had to be, not that I blame them I'd be hesitant too but it's like everyone is walking on eggshells around me waiting for me to slip up just once. Then you came along and made me feel like maybe I wasn't a total fuck up"
"Bucky you're an amazing person. A true hero in my eyes and the definition of a good man" you watched him crack a smile as he grabbed your hand and intertwined your fingers. 
"Thank you" he said before kissing your hand. You both were exhausted, fighting to keep your eyes open. 
"You're welcome" you yawned pulling your body closer to his as you both held each in silence, sleep taking over your bodies
///
The next morning you woke to the feeling of Bucky's fingers trailing gently over your body, tracing every curve as if he was trying to memorize you in this exact state, "good morning" you say as you rub your eyes
"Good morning" Bucky gives a say smile still staring at you in adoration, "thank you for last night, that was probably the most I've slept in weeks" 
"Anytime" you smiled before placing a gentle kiss on his forehead, "I have an early morning meeting but if you ever want to do this again I'll be glad to help"
Bucky chuckled, "I think I'll take you up on that offer"
///
Taglist
@wildxwidow @hackerholland @nelly-belly @marvelgurl @inas-thing @hehehehannahthings @prancerrparkerr @abiseifried @randomwriter1021 @hunnybunimdun @raajali3 @liltimmyst​ @Army24-7
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sebastianstanisahotmf · 3 months
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First 'date'
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Bucky Barnes x Reader
A/N Sorry for not being active I've just been spending time with friends and family but I'm back now! Also, this is going to be a series but idk how often I will update it.
THIS IS NOT AN 18+ FIC BUT I STILL FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE WITH MINORS READING MY FICS SO PLEASE DNI IF YOU ARE A MINOR.
Summary You and Bucky go on a first 'date'
DO NOT REPOST ONTO ANY OTHER APPS/WEBSITES. THE ONLY PLACE THIS FIC IS ON IS TUMBLR.
Warnings Fluff
You couldn't remember the last time you felt so nervous. You were getting ready for a date with James (or Bucky as he tells you to call him.) You met him on a dating app and were texting for two weeks before you decided to go on this date. 
As well as feeling nervous, you also felt excited to meet Bucky. He seemed so sweet over text and judging by his profile picture, he was the hottest guy you had ever seen. 
You could only hope he was like this in real life. 
“Can I come in now?” your friend, Ella, shouted from the other side of your bedroom door. 
“Yeah,” you shouted back. 
Your so-called ‘date’ was more of a meeting at a coffee shop so you were wearing a slightly oversized shirt, your favourite jeans, and a pair of black sneakers. You had minimal makeup on and your hair was styled in a way that made you feel confident. 
You and Bucky are anxious people and agreed that a coffee shop would be a much more calming environment when meeting each other for the first time. 
“Do I look ok?” you asked Ella. 
“You look amazing y/n!”
“Really?” you questioned. 
“You're going to a coffee shop, not a Michelin-star restaurant,” Ella told you. 
“Ok,” you took a deep breath, “I’m ready.”
You grabbed your bag off your bed and made sure you had everything you needed. 
“I'll see you later,” you told Ella. 
“I'll see you later if you don't end up getting laid.” 
You rolled your eyes and left the apartment you shared with Ella. 
The coffee shop was a five-minute walk away so you weren't in a hurry to get there. 
—------------------------------------------------------
Once you got there you scanned the shop and your eyes landed on the man sitting at the table in the corner. You could only see the back of his head but he was dressed in all black and that's what Bucky told you he wore. 
You cautiously approached him so as not to scare him.
“A-are you Bucky?” you asked. 
The man turned around and smiled at you, “I am.” he replied.
“Thank God, if you said no I was gonna be so embarrassed,” you walked over to the chair across from him and sat down. 
“How are you today?” he asked, cringing at the question. 
“I was a little nervous earlier but I feel better since you seem to be in a similar state,” you responded with a chuckle. 
“Is it that obvious?” he asked, rubbing the back of his head.
“Just a little bit, but you don’t have to feel bad about it,” you assured him.
You looked at the table where his hands were resting. You noticed the black gloves but didn’t say anything, you knew who he was but weren’t sure if he knew that and you didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. You didn’t see him as a bad person or a villain. You did your research on him a while back and you could’ve never blamed him for his actions, he didn’t have control of himself at the time. 
He seemed so genuine and kind, nothing like the monster the government made him out to be. You started to speak about how your week had been so far and you thought it was funny how Bucky spoke about his friend Sam who he seemed to love and hate at the same time.
“Do you want to order now?” he asked you.
You just nodded in response.
“If you want I can order for us,” Bucky offered.
You told him your order and thanked him for ordering for you. He got up from his seat and walked over to the counter to order. He told the barista the drinks he wanted and paid. As he was waiting for the drinks he looked over to you and smiled. 
You returned his smile and butterflies erupted in your stomach. You tried to calm your nerves by looking at your lap. 
A few minutes later, Bucky returned with the drinks and sat back down.
“Thanks,” you told him, “you didn’t have to buy my drink for me.” 
“It’s the least I could do doll,” he told you with a smile.
You both continued to get to know eachother even more until the barista came over to tell you that closing time was in 5 minutes.
“So I guess that’s the end of our date,” Bucky chuckled, “ I hope I wasn’t too boring.” 
“Hey, don’t put your self down, I had a good time,” you gave him a small smile.
You said your goodbyes and went your separate ways. 
-----------------------------
As you walked through the door of your apartment, you were bombarded by Ella.
“So how did it go with Bucky?” he wiggled her eyebrows at you.
“It was really good, I hope we can go on another date, maybe to a restaurant next time,” you told her with a smile on your face.
Ella squealed and pulled you further into your apartment. 
You were about to go into the livingroom when you heard the notification sound on your phone go off. 
“Who is it?” Ella inquired.
“It’s Bucky,” you replied, clicking on the notification, “He wants to go on another date!” you almost shouted with excitement.
“Fuck yeah, my bestie is finally gonna get that D.” 
“Calm down, you’re more excited about me having sex with Bucky then I am,” you laughed.
The rest of the night was spen watching movies whilst eating snacks and telling Ella everything about your ‘date’ with Bucky.
If you want to be tagged whenever I post a fic then click on the link
If you want to see what I repost, my other account is @sebastianstanisahotmf-reblogs
Taglist:
@nicoline1998enilocin @buckys-wintersoldier @kenzs-world @booscherripop @hisredheadedgoddess28 @kandis-mom @cutedisneygrl
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pixiexdusts-world · 10 months
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Incorrect quote
Tony: Y/n... How do I begin to explain Y/n?
Bucky: Y/n is flawless.
Natasha: I hear their hair's insured for $10,000.
Steve: I hear they do car commercials... in Japan.
Peter: One time they punched me in the face... it was awesome.
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talesofely · 4 months
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Save My Tears (2)
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A Sequel (Part 2) to The (Wo)Man Who Can't Be Moved. (Part 1)
Pairings : Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader
Summary : Natasha's your ex-girlfriend, she broke up with you without giving you a solid reason as to why. Obviously, you want her back. One problem, she's unofficially dating Bucky Barnes. So you decided to solve it with a little performance.
Warnings : Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending (or is it?😏), swearing, one line used 'her' as reader's pronouns, pls tell me if u see anything else
Word Count : 2.1k
Note : here's pt2 ! pls let my family go now :c
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Natasha.
Natasha didn't want to attend tonight's party. 'Cause the last party she went to was with you. The last party she went to, she was clinging onto your arm. The last party she went to, she slept in your arms.
Unlike you, who always asked if you could be her date for the night, Bucky asked her to be his date for tonight. Normally Natasha wouldn't notice those miniscule things, but it was just so different from you.
Unlike you, who always insisted on picking her up from her room, Bucky just waited for her at the elevator.
Bucky brought her a bouquet of roses when they met at the elevator! You never bought her a bouquet of real roses... cause you always gave her paper ones, ones you knew she would appreciate more since they don't wither.
Bucky asked how he looked and said that Natasha looked perfect to be his date. You always told her she looked amazing, and joked about not looking good enough to be her date.
Bucky bought her a drink and a stronger drink for himself, like a gentleman. You always got the lesser alcoholic ones since you wanted to stay sober enough to take care of her in case she gets drunk.
She hated comparing him to you. But she couldn't help it. His arms just don't compare to yours.
She shook her head to clear away any thoughts about you, wanting to focus on her night with Bucky. She subconsciously searched the crowds for you, but she couldn't find that y/h/c hair that she could always find in the midst of the crowds.
Bucky asked her to dance. They stood in the middle of the makeshift dancefloor. Everyone's eyes were on them, she didn't like it. You always knew she felt uncomfortable being the center of attention. Bucky seemed to like it, though.
She saw how Bucky signaled Steve to sing. Mouthing a song title she wasn't able to read. Steve seemed skeptical at first, but the questioning look from Bucky caused him to concede and sing the song.
When 'Wonderful Tonight' started playing, Natasha's eyes winded. It was your song. The song you always sang to her. The song you two danced together. She's dancing it again, just not with you.
She tried her best to smile, and tried her best to not imagine you as she danced with Bucky.
She remembered how you used to sing the song in her ear as you two slowly danced around the kitchen, at 2am, using the refrigerator light as light, whenever she had nightmares.
"Oh, my darling, you were wonderful tonight" You—Bucky—whispered in her ear as the song came to an end. You—Bucky—kissed her forehead as you two pulled away.
She was going to excuse herself to the bathroom to clear out her thoughts when the next singer caught her attention.
It was you.
I saw you dancing in a crowded room
You look so happy when I'm not with you
You looked so breathtaking, she thought. Oh how she would've loved to arrive and leave with her in your arms. But she couldn't. She was in Bucky's arms.
"Hey, everyone. I hope y'all are having an amazing night. I do hope you enjoy these songs I'm about to play." You said as you clicked the instrumental version of the song you chose, on the tablet.
She couldn't deny how much she missed your voice. How much she longs to hear that voice say those 8 letters she used to hear everyday from you.
But then you saw me, caught you by surprise
A single teardrop falling from your eye
When your eyes met, she didn't know what to feel. She didn't know whether to feel happy, to feel sad, to feel hurt, or to feel angry that she let you go.
That bittersweet smile you gave her, hurt her in ways she didn't even know was possible. She got shot before, she got stabbed, she got punched and kicked multiple times before, but this type of pain is something she's never experienced before.
She wanted to run up to the stage and beg for your forgiveness while hugging you tightly when she saw the single tear falling from your eye.
I don't know why I run away
I made you cry when I run away
She left before the song ended. She ran away, again. She ran to the rooftop. The place where you two always ran together to.
She didn't even notice Bucky following her.
Wanda Immediately approached you when you got off stage. She pulled you into a hug before pointing at the stairway up to the rooftop.
"She's up there. Go follow her, please. Bucky followed her, I'm worried it might not end well for Bucky." She said with a wince, remembering the last time someone tried to approach Natasha while she had so many emotions running.
You bit your lower lip, your hesitation was strong. But the worried look from Wanda was enough to make you run up.
"Leave me alone for a minute, Buck." You heard Natasha say, trying to control her emotions. Her hands are gripping the rails so tightly, her knuckles were turning white.
"What's wrong Tash?" The nickname he used wasn't helping. You used to call her that all the time.
"Please, Bucky, just 5 minutes. Please." She pleaded, you noticed her grip was getting tighter.
"Just tell me what's wrong, Natasha!" He raised his voice. Something you never did in all your years you two dated.
"For fuck's sake I still love her! I still fucking love Y/N so much, that it actually hurts! Is that what you wanted to hear?!" Natasha finally screamed back, turning to face Bucky directly. Tears were rolling down her cheeks.
"Я так скучаю по ней, Bucky, which is stupid cause I was the one who broke her heart. So I have no right to act like it hurts me more, but it still hurts so much." She murmured, not even caring that she was crying in front of Bucky. (translation : I miss her so much.)
"What?" Bucky couldn't believe it. He thought they were both in love, he was even going to ask her to be his girlfriend officially tonight. "Leave, please." Natasha forced herself to calm down, glaring at Bucky as he shamefully walked towards the stairwell where you were.
When Bucky saw you, he tried his best to give you a genuine smile. "Her heart's still yours. Don't lose it." He said as he gave your shoulder a pat and walked away.
You took a deep breath before approaching Natasha.
"Tasha." Just one word from you was enough to gain Natasha's attention. She turned around in surprise, wiping her tears hastily.
"Y/N? What're you doing here?" She tried her best to act calm, using all her spy skills to act collected in front of you. But you both know that you could see right through it.
"Was it true, Natasha? You told Bucky you still love me. Were you telling the truth?" You asked carefully, not wanting to overwhelm her. You leaned your back against the railings beside her, she had her arms leaning against it as she looked at the busy streets below.
"What are you going to do if I said yes?" She answered your question with her own question. You just shrugged, staring up into the stars.
You felt her shiver when a particularly strong wind blew past you. Instinctively, you gave her your jacket.
You could've asked me why I broke your heart
You could've told me that you fell apart
"Why aren't you asking me why I left? Why I ran away? Why aren't you screaming at me? Why aren't you mad at me?" She said after you placed your jacket on her shoulders. She was frustrated at herself for ending things with you. She was also frustrated as to why you weren't hating her like she thinks she deserves.
"What's the point of getting mad? Being mad at you won't get you back, it won't help me understand why you left either." She hated how understanding you were. It made her guilt grow bigger with every word you say.
"I really want to ask something though," She looked at you expectantly, thinking of possible questions you could ask. "Why'd you run away?" You felt her breath hitch when you finally let those words leave your tongue. You were also nervous yourself, not knowing what to expect from your ex-girlfriend.
"I was scared." She took a deep breath before continuing, "You're just too perfect. We were so perfect that it terrified me. Nothing stays that good that long. Everything had consequences. Maybe the consequence for me was that you moved on so quickly."
But you walked past me like I wasn't there
And just pretended like you didn't care
Your brows furrowed. 'You moved on too quickly'?
"But I haven't moved on, Nat. What gave you the idea that I already did?"
"You just walk past me everyday at the compound ever since you returned. I thought you didn't care about it anymore." She finally looked at you, both your eyes meeting like they were always destined to meet.
"'Cause I didn't want to hold you back, Natasha. I thought it'd help us both move on if we acted like nothing happened. I guess it didn't, I'm sorry." You were always so nice. Natasha hated it. She hated the fact that she feels like she's abusing your kindness and that she couldn't do anything about it.
Take me back 'cause I wanna stay
Save your tears for another
"Does that mean you still love me?" Natasha hesitantly asked, biting her lower lip.
"Of course, Tash." You said with a small sad smile. A smile immediately made itsm's way to her face. But when she saw your smile, her's faltered and her brows furrowed.
"I'm assuming there's a 'but' to that sentence?"
You nodded slowly, giving her a smile that made her worries grow.
"I never stopped loving you, Tasha, just... not in the same way as before." Natasha felt her heart drop. No matter how much she tried to stop the tears from falling, she couldn't stop them when she heard those words from you.
"What do you mean, Y/N?"
Yeah, I broke your heart like someone did to mine
And now you won't love me for a second time
You bit your lower lip, trying to find the right words to explain it properly to her.
"I still love you, but you hurt me, Tasha. I understand you got scared, but if you really loved me you would've told me. You should've explained your feelings and worries to me. We could've gotten through that together." You hated seeing her cry, more so being the reason she's crying. But you needed to tell her this, you both needed it to move on.
"I'm sorry. Does that mean we— you don't want me back anymore?" She asked in a voice so quiet you could barely hear it.
I realize that I'm much too late
And you deserve someone better
Your smile broke all her hopes. She started sobbing quietly, something she's never done before. She's a silent crier, so hearing her sob hurts you way more than you expected. You immediately pulled her into a hug, confusing her but her mind was too foggy to even question it. Her arms instinctively went around your neck as she buried her face into the crook of your neck.
Save your tears for another day
"Of course I want you back, silly. I'm just saying that we need to work to get back to where we were before. I won't ever let you go again, Natasha, so please don't let go either." You whispered into her ear. Every part of Natasha came back to life the moment those words left your lips.
You felt her hug you tighter. You continued to whisper comforting words to calm her down, as she whispered promises to you as well.
"You are the only sure thing in a world filled with a thousand doubts, Natalia. Please don't walk away again." You murmured, feeling her nodding her head hastily.
"Never again, my love. You're the only thing that keeps me sane. I love you." She pulled away from the hug to cup your cheeks and close the gap between your lips.
That's when you knew, you're never going to see her in the arms of anyone besides yourself, ever again.
Save your tears for another day (ah)
Save your tears for another day (ah)
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note :
surprise ! the original ending was that bucky and natasha ended up together cause y/n didn't want to take natasha back. buuuut i didn't wanna hurt myself that much while writing it so yeah, u guys get this. enjoyyyy!
taglist (i won't do taglists but i will be doing it for fics w/ diff parts) : @taliiiaasteria @itstashaswife @username23345 @wandanatlov3r @esposadejoyhuerta @marvelwomen-simp @artm99 @d3adp00ls @freewaysigns-underpasses @unique0003 @inlovewithalcinadimitrescu @spid3rfan @ellieromanov @mikookaaaaaao @miky40s @ncsdlr @unknownfanfic @pipsipey17 @tarathia @kyky-maximoff @graceher07 (i didn't know if the people who asked for pt2 wanted to get tagged so if u didn't, i'm so sorrryyyyy)
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its-really-dry · 1 year
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clint: raw jalapeño peppers raw are the best!
nat: you're supposed to cook them
y/n: in all honesty, anything raw is good..... *smirks*
clint: *snickers*
tony: *chokes*
nat: oh my god
sam: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
wanda: *chuckles*
bucky: *slams fork on the table* all i ask, IS ONE DINNER thats ALL i ask
steve: whats so funny? *is acc confused*
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bbyboybucket · 1 year
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Beds
Bucky Barnes x Reader
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Summary: While sharing a hotel room with Reader, Bucky has a nightmare.
A/N: Surprise. Bet y’all didn’t expect a fic from me. How longs it been? Too long. Anyways, I’m rewriting one of my old fics, or more so taking the same concept but doing it more in character. Also I think this is the first time I’ve written something where we don’t see Bucky’s pov, so I think that’s kinda fun. Btw I’m rusty so don’t judge me if it shows. Also I think this is gender neutral but I’m not sure?
Warnings: language, sexual references, nightmares, ptsd, panic attack (not too intense), allusions to some hydra stuff but nothing graphic, hurt/comfort, frenemies to lovers, Bucky is moody, the one bed trope™️, no use of “y/n”, kinda sappy
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A loud sigh came from the left of you just before the elevator dinged and the metal doors creaked open. You ignored him, you chose not to engage in his passive aggressiveness. You weren’t going to accept the invitation of a petty rant hiding behind that sigh.
You walked down the hallway with Bucky stalking behind you, like an angry pitbull trailing after its owner.
“I don’t even know why we got a fucking hotel in the first place.” Bucky grumbled, and you could practically feel the weight of his eye roll, even though you couldn't see it.
“Here we go.” You muttered under your breath. “What did you want? A safe house? It’s not like we’re on some high stakes, undercover op. Anything more than a hotel would be excessive.”
“Anything more woulda had better sleeping options.” He whined. “Coulda at least got us separate rooms.”
“My god, give it a rest Bucky, you’ve been complaining all day about this.” You we’re exasperated, it was about the third time you’d heard him gripe that day.
“Well, I’m not a fan. Us sharing is the stupidest fucking idea Sam’s ever had.”
“Bitching about it isn’t gonna change anything. And, it’s not like we have to sleep together or anything, I’ll be in a whole different bed.” You said, unlocking the room door. You had been looking forward to chilling out and resting, but as soon as you entered the room, you realized that your night would be anything but restful.
“Fuck.” You laughed, humorlessly, knowing you were about to hear an endless rant. “I take that back, there isn’t different beds.”
Surprisingly that rant didn’t come. Bucky weirdly seemed calmer than he had before and merely shrugged. “‘S fine. I’ll take the floor.”
“Well, one of us can try the couch?”
“That thing could fit a toddler at best.” He gestured towards the small leather love seat as if it was the most ridiculous suggestion he had ever heard, and in all honesty, he had a point.
You pinched the skin between your eyebrows. “Sam said he booked a two person room.”
He shrugged again and then blankly said. “This is why he shoulda booked separate rooms.”
“My god Bucky, I’m not that bad of a roommate. I don’t snore, I don’t sleep walk, and it’s not like I’m gonna kill you in your sleep. It’s one fucking night. Just-“ You took a deep breath and tried to mellow out. “You can have the bed.”
“No, you can have it.”
“You’re obviously more tore up about this than me, so it’s yours. I’ll sleep on the floor.”
“No.” He refused, his eyes held an odd stubbornness. “I’ll sleep on the floor.”
“I literally don’t care, I’ve done it a million times. Plus, your grumpy ass probably needs some good sleep.” You half teased, trying to do the nice thing. You unzipped your bag and pulled your belongings out. “I’m gonna go change clothes.”
When you came back from the bathroom, Bucky was already in his boxers and a T-shirt, positioning a pillow and blanket on the floor.
“I told you the bed was yours.”
“Okay, and?”
“Why are you getting down there?“
“Why the fuck are you arguing?”
“Because you’re all pissy about this whole situation, so I’m trying to make your life easier and give you the bed.” You didn’t understand his defiance and odd aversion to the thing he’d been complaining about restlessly: the better sleeping option.
“I don’t want the goddamn bed, just shut the fuck up about it!” Bucky snapped. His outburst caught you off guard, he acted as if you had been purposefully pushing his buttons.
“Damn, fine.” You held your hands up in defeat, almost offended at the way he lashed out. “I get you’re trying to be all gentlemen-like but ya know, the aggressiveness defeats the purpose.”
“It’s not about being a gentlemen. Don’t get it twisted, I’m not being nice, I-“ He grunted. “Never mind I don’t owe you a fuckin’ explanation. Just get in bed.”
“I will, thank you, cause I’m tired. Especially tired of whatever the fuck is up your ass and has you so bitchy.”
You said it with full sincerity, of course you were used to bickering with Bucky but it always was in a playful manner, even when annoyed with each other, it was always friendly fire. There had been no sign of that all afternoon, Bucky was purely hostile and treating you like his greatest burden.
“You running your damn mouth and arguing isn’t helping anything.” He spat as he turned off the lights.
“Wow, sorry. Didn’t know offering you the bed was so fucking rude and offensive.”
“Shut the fuck up.” He groaned.
You muttered “fucking dick” under your breath.
“I heard that.”
As you settled into the bed, you couldn't help but roll your eyes in frustration. You found yourself pondering what you could have possibly done to provoke such a strong reaction from him. You couldn't shake the feeling that it wasn't entirely about you. Maybe something else was going on and you were standing in as Bucky’s punching bag, just being the unfortunate catheter for his anger.
It didn’t matter. You had to force all the worry and aggravation out of your head because his attitude wasn’t worth losing sleep over. The last thing you need was to be exhausted on a mission.
—————————
You were jolted awake by a sudden, loud gasp, followed by a soft groan emanating from his direction. Rubbing your eyes, you opened them to find him sitting upright, his knees drawn close to his chest. He looked so small, a stark contrast to the huge stature and borderline intimidating presence you’d become so familiar with. His breathing was audible despite the distance between you, it was quick and shallow.
“Buck?” You concernedly called out to him but he didn’t answer. You then got out of bed, and flicked on the nightstand lamp.
“Bucky?” You tried again when you were closer.
Out of all the time you’d known Bucky, this was the first you’d seen him vulnerable. He was trembling harshly, hyperventilating too. He seemed equally dazed and terrified, but also distant as if he were lost in his head. You always thought Bucky had rather sad eyes but right now, the way they were widened with fear and slightly watering, took it to a whole new level.
You knew what was happening and seeing it felt like a stab to the heart. You slowly sat down in front of him, keeping space between you as to not worsen his panic.
“Buck, it’s okay.” You cooed. “Can you hear me right now?”
His gaze shifted to you, finally making eye contact, which gave you an answer.
“Okay, can you try to breathe with me? Deep breath…in 1…2…3” You exaggeratedly took large, slow inhale to lead him. “Out 1…2…3…”
You repeated the example, guiding until he finally started to follow along with you. “Good, you’re doing good. Do you know where you are?”
“….hotel. We’re on a mission?”
“Good, that’s right, good. It’s okay. You’re safe.” With a gentle and caring tone, you spoke to him, hoping to bring a sense of peace to the turmoil that was raging within him. Your heart felt heavy as you seen the pain that was laced within him, and you wished so badly that you could erase it all. You’d been scared you weren’t doing the right things, but his increasing improvement made you more confident.
“Can I touch you?”
He nodded.
You supportively placed your hand on top of his, stroking your thumb over his skin in a soothing manner. He initially flinched but didn’t pull away. “Starting to calm down now?”
“Yeah.” He released a long heavy breath and wiped the wetness off his eyelids with his free hand.
You sat silently with him, providing that tender, tactile support as he as he worked to regain his composure and steady his breathing. As he gradually calmed down, you noticed the shame creeping over him, causing his cheeks to flush red and his gaze to avert from yours.
“I didn’t want you to see this shit.” He finally said after minutes of silence.
“It’s fine-“
“Fuckin embarrassing is what it is.”
“No, stuff happens. I’m not gonna judge, ya know? I understand. I know what having panic attacks is like.” You revealed in attempt to make him feel more seen.
He slightly shook his head, at himself instead of towards to you, but he stayed silent.
“You okay?”
“Yeah.” He paused for a moment, he licked his lips and hung his head even lower. “‘M used to it. Get ‘em bout every night.”
“The panic attacks?”
“Nightmares. Those sometimes comes after though.”
“Oh.” You whispered, feeling like something in you had just shattered. “About hydra?”
“Yeah.”
“You wanna talk about it?” You offered carefully.
“Nothing you should hear. My head’s a fucked up place.” He laughed humorlessly.
“Try me.”
He hesitated for a moment, you assumed he was debating on wether or not he should trust you with such a heavy part of himself. “Basically all memories. Not so much dreams, more so just stuff that’s already happened. Flashbacks I guess.”
As his mouth parted to speak, only to close again, you knew that he wasn’t finished so you waited patiently, allowing him the time he needed to gather his thoughts.
“Most of the time it’s…you know…what I’ve done. People I’ve killed. It’s….of course it’s horrible. Pretty gruesome but uh….I’ve gotten better at dealing with those, it’s still….I just get em so much that I can calm down faster now. But sometimes…it’s the shit Hydra did to me and it’s just….I’d get punished a lot. Some kinda torture or beatings, I’ll spare you the details.”
You continued to stroke his hand and stayed silent, not wanting to push him.
“But uh…they had this chair. Um, I’d get strapped down and they’d electrocute me. That’s how they’d…ya know. And I’d always end up there for a wipe after I fucked up. Or even if I didn’t. I don’t what’s worse honestly…the sick twisted shit they’d come up with or the wipe but…but reliving all that….”
“That’s fucking terrifying.”
“Yeah. Yeah, terrifying is an understatement. Sometimes…it’s hard to feel safe after that.”
His breathing started to pick up again. The cracks in his voice made it clear he was starting to get overwhelmed.
You then firmly grasped his hand, giving it a supportive squeeze. “It’s okay, you don’t have to keep going if you don’t want to.”
“I don’t like to think about all that. I try to never actually. It’s like…obviously it’s…I can’t describe how fucking awful. But at the same time, if I do think about it, it’s like I’m ignoring all the evil shit I’ve done. And that’s not fair to everyone I’ve wronged. So then….if I never think about or deal with the torture….when I have to relive it in these goddamn nightmares…it just fucks me up worse. And my fucking luck is one of the few times it happens is when I’m sharing a room with someone.”
Your heart sank to the floor, your own eyes were watering at this point from getting just this small glimpse of his pain. “I’m so sorry, Buck. Hell, I don’t even know what to say right now. I wish I could do more to help.”
“You’re doing enough.“
“You didn’t deserve it, ya know? I don’t know everything that went on but you never deserved to suffer like that.”
“Half-debatable. At certain point it had to become karma for the suffering I was causing myself.” He shrugged solemnly.
“That’s not true. You had no control.”
He sighed exasperatedly, filled with a sad frustration directed at himself. He put his face in his palm. “We’ve had that conversation. You already know I don’t see it that way.”
“Yeah but I hope one day you will. And I’ll die before I stop trying to get it through your head that you’re innocent. You know you’re strong, right? So damn strong to be holding it together right now. After going through all that pain and to still be here and be a good man? To come as far as you have. I’ve never met anyone as strong as you.”
“We can agree to disagree but I appreciate it….and thanks sitting with me and calming me down and all that.”
“Of course.”
“I’m sorry about earlier. This is why…I didn’t wanna share. And this is….one…of the reasons I don’t like sleeping in a bed. Makes the nightmares worse sometimes. That’s not your fault though, so I shouldn’t’ve…I just didn’t want you to know.”
“It’s alright. I get it now.”
“I shouldn’t’ve took it out on you. I really am sorry.”
“Buck, I get why you were upset. Well kinda, I honestly can’t imagine even a fraction of what you go through.”
“Goin a little far with the pity.” He grew a tiny smirk.
“Compassion.” You corrected. “And I can’t help it, I mean…not to get all sappy, but I care about you. A lot.”
His smirk morphed into a smile and you mirrored it. You wrapped your arm around him and laid your head on his shoulder, Bucky then slowly encircled you with his own arms. You knew the hug was Bucky's way of wordlessly affirming that he cared about you too.
“Didn’t know Mr. Grumpy was capable of hugging.”
“Consider it a one time gift.”
You chuckled in response but then an idea entered your mind.
“You think it’d help if I slept with you?” You asked softly.
He gave you a cheeky grin. “Could at least take me out to dinner first.”
“You know what I meant.”
He sighed. “Not to be an ass but I literally just told you I don’t like beds?”
“No dumb ass, I mean down here.”
He tilted his head and gave a tight lipped frown. “You don’t gotta do that.”
“No. But if it’d help you feel more comfortable, then I want to.”
He didn’t answer at first but because his face had always been an open book, revealing every emotion with striking transparency, he wore an expression that was etched with heartbreaking gratitude.
“Yeah…we can try that.” He whispered, as if he was in shock.
With gentle movements, you plucked the blanket and pillow from the bed and nestled yourself beside him. As you lay towards him, your faces drew closer, until they were mere inches apart. You could feel his warm breath caressing your skin. In that moment, time seemed to stand still as you both gazed into each other's eyes, it was almost hypnotic. There was no awkwardness when it should have been expected, instead, a comforting feeling washed over you. You were consumed by excitement, tinged with a soothing calmness. Sure, it was paradoxical, but it was consuming and left you lost in the moment.
“Um…” Bucky started hesitantly but then cut himself off, he bit his bottom lip nervously.
Before you had a chance to even consider the words, they spilled from your lips. You were surprised with your own spontaneity, but the question had already slipped. “You wanna cuddle?”
It was as if you read his mind, you could practically see all the anxiety melt off Bucky before he pulled you into his chest. “This okay?” He asked.
“Mhm.” You replied, allowing yourself to sink into the comforting warmth of his body, all while listening to the soft thumps of his heart beating. It was a new intimacy that strangely felt familiar and natural, like everything had suddenly fallen into place.
You heard him yawn and you hummed fondly at how cute it was. “Goodnight, Buck.”
Tenderly, he leaned in and softly placed his lips upon your forehead, holding them there for a fleeting moment before settling his chin atop your head.
—————————
Bucky straddled your lap, his hand cupping your face as he devoured you in a passionate kiss that unraveled you with each flick of his tongue. His other hand roamed to less innocent regions of your body, exploring them with a touch that was both bold and tender.
He repositioned and pressed you down onto the couch, towering over you as his tongue continued to dance in your mouth. You were both breathless, and desiring more. He proceeded to plant kisses on your jawline before moving down to nibble on your neck.
He suddenly stopped, muttering against your skin. “You wanna move to your room? Have a little more space for this?”
“You know what’s funny?”
“Hm?”
“How before we got together, you hated beds, but now you want in my sheets every damn second.” You teased.
“Well…feels a lot more pleasant now.”
“Weird way to say ‘I’m always horny’.”
“I’m making up for 80 some years. And like you aren’t, you’re worse than me half the time.”
“Definitely worked up now, so get me to the bed and we’ll go as many rounds as you want, pervert.”
“Fuck you.” He laughed.
“I’m waiting for it.”
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