#but I have thinking about this for literally forever

[darkshrimpemotions]

Sometimes I remember everything season 5 gave us and I lose my mind all over again. Like:

Nandor thinking he forgot Guillermo’s birthday so he makes everyone go to dinner to celebrate and then buys Guillermo something he said he wanted to surprise him.

Nandor being extremely jealous of Guillermo’s time and attention.

More Nandor dick lore: not only has Guillermo seen it and given it his stamp of approval, re-designed it, and is all Nandor can think about when he uses it...Guillermo has also now circumcised it. 💀

Nandor going to space to impress Guillermo because he's jealous of all the time he's spending with Laszlo.

Nandor and Guillermo walking home together after the Pride Parade to find their housemates in the midst of an orgy, and Nandor inviting Guillermo to join.

Guillermo being a dad again.

Guillermo saying he loves Nandor the most.

Nandor once again trying to goad Guillermo into defending his importance to Nandor and being visibly taken aback and disappointed when Guillermo doesn't bite.

Nandor being all smitten and dreamy-eyed as he describes Guillermo slaughtering a theatre full of vampires for him like it's a fond memory.

Nandor begging the Baron to show mercy to Guillermo.

Nandor clutching at one of Guillermo’s sweaters like a security blanket and looking distraught at the thought of losing him.

Nandor falling to his knees, holding Guillermo's head so gently in his lap, stroking his hair, crying when he thought he was dead, and arguing that Guillermo was more than just a familiar to him.

Nandor staring sadly out his window wishing Guillermo well, thinking he's lost him forever.

Nandor's face and the way he says Guillermo’s name when Guillermo pops out of his coffin.

The fact that when Guillermo was in danger he ran to the safest place he knew, and it was NANDOR'S COFFIN.

Nandor having a card Guillermo gave him over a decade ago memorized word for word, proving once and for all that he has ALWAYS cared more for Guillermo than is considered seemly for a vampire, even from the very beginning.

Nandor declaring he knows Guillermo better than anyone.

Nandor calling Guillermo "good boy."

The tears in Guillermo’s eyes when he confesses what he did to Nandor, and how afraid he was of hurting him.

Nandor's look of absolute heartbreak when Guillermo confesses that he asked someone else to turn him.

The implications of "you could have asked me!" in the context of the fact that Guillermo hadn't actually brought up his turning to Nandor at all between 3x10 and 5x01 (the implication being if he HAD asked again, Nandor would have done it).

Guillermo finally admitting that being a vampire had become more about being closer to his found family than about vampirism itself for him.

Nandor knowing all along how to get Guillermo to come to him but not using it until he had decided not to kill him.

Nandor forgiving Guillermo for something considered utterly unforgivable, accepting what is considered a massive humiliation, and getting over it for Guillermo’s sake.

Yerno Nandor looking at Guillermo’s baby pictures with his mother-in-law.

Nandor putting his life in Guillermo’s hands and speaking to him in Farsi.

Guillermo instinctively hypnotizing his own mother to protect Nandor.

Nandor inviting Guillermo home with him and declaring he will live with them all as an equal.

Nandor knowing immediately why Guillermo wasn't a vampire, and how to fix it (implying he HAS thought of turning him).

Nandor being so excited at Guillermo’s transformation, quite literally happier than we've ever seen him.

Nandor looking out for Guillermo after his transformation and knowing something was wrong, then revealing he has always feared Guillermo would not thrive as a vampire (essentially reframing his whole attitude toward turning Guillermo all this time).

Nandor giving Guillermo a choice and another chance, creating a whole ceremony for him because he DOES know Guillermo, all while looking sad the entire time and utterly devastated when Guillermo chooses not to remain a vampire.

Nandor breaking the only real taboo for vampires in front of half a dozen witnesses for Guillermo’s sake.

Basically just...absolute confirmation that Nandor loves Guillermo back and has always cared about him.

[emblazons]

forewarning: this is the longest "this is mike's arc and I'm tired of denying it" breakdown i've done in a min (it's def about gay mike bar none so. skip if you want)

I keep reading posts about "where Mike is with his feelings for Will" all across the dash now, and...while I get the idea of wanting a Mike as devastated by not hearing from Will as Will was because Mike's aware he has romantic feelings, *Arya Stark Voice* that's not him?

In the show, Mike Wheeler wears his heart on his sleeve. He is prone to emotionality and doesn't really track his feelings within himself the way Will does—is "less interior," for a lack of a better phrase, which both plays dramatically into how things are playing out with both El and Will and makes it (dare I say it) out of character to believe he's as "hurt by his own hope" as Will is when it comes to mutual feelings.

Let me see if I can explain.

First: I think it's important to keep in mind that, at least with Mike, you get someone who will subconsciously act on "inner truths" before he even realizes they're true about him—and someone who will behave according to whatever external reality deems "correct" until he realizes 1) its bullshit or 2) its not true for him personally. We see this season over season:

First with how he willfully breaks rank with authority (his parents, the police, even the community) first to find Will and then again breaks rank with even his friends to protect Eleven in season 1

Then in S2 when he throws "proper" behavior to the wind (which is even slightly acknowledged in Will's 'don't tell the others' / 'crazy together) to be there for + lowkey confess the depth of his feelings to Will (everyone say thank you shed scene)

Again (though slightly different) in S3, with how there's this bubbling thing being gay he doesn't realize has started to manifest itself—cue that comment the duffer's made forever ago about S3 being about "the monster of puberty," aka when people start to understand their own attractions—until the very end of the season with how he realizes he's not attracted to El

And finally in S4, when he consciouslly knows for a fact he's not into El and tries to hide it—quite poorly, because, as I said, he can only abide a "lie" when he doesn't realize it is one—but hasn't yet realized that the thing bubbling up inside him THIS season (that keeps slipping out without him realizing it) is his attraction to/romantic feelings for Will.

In Season 4 especially, its easy to track how this "I can lie...until I know it is one" affects Mike's romantic prospects; we see plainly that his lying about his feelings to El during the monologue was a failure because the power of Mike's whole character is rooted in the importance of him being true to himself and his heart. Season over season, we've seen that Mike has to be honest with people once he knows what he feels in order for his leadership to be effective—and by S4, he knows he doesn't love El romantically (+ has known for a HOT minute, aka since his little S3 post-kiss revelation)—which is why he tries to skirt around the issue with that "I care for you so much" rather than lie to El's face about his lack of romantic feelings.

Basically: once Mike consciously knows something is not right in either the world or inside himself, he has to act on it...or suffer the consequences of his lack of honesty. But then....what does that have to do with him not being the one "not trying to be in love" with Will?

Despite the fandom urge to deny it even in the wake of The Duffers and Finn Wolfhard themselves telling them it's true: Mike being oblivious to his own feelings, or at least consciously unaware, of his own romantic feelings for Will is a solid amount of what's driving his character's growth right now. Mike "friends don't lie" Wheeler has spent the entirety of this show trying to be as honest as possible with the people around him, and we've clearly seen as of S4 what happens when he isn't honest—the world (quite literally) falls apart.

When it comes to his romantic arc especially, it's important to remember this is true, because it means, through logical deduction, that Mike isn't hiding the fact that he has feelings for Will throughout season 4—he's hiding the fact that he's not in love with his girlfriend the way he's supposed to be, which both plays into the whole forced conforming through-line of the season and explains the crux of his narrative even as we are primarily shown that experience through Will's eyes—unreliable as they are. The thing leaking out of Mike without his knowledge is the fact that he likes boys—but the thing he's consciously hiding and lying about is the fact that he doesn't like girls the way he knows he's supposed to.

Now: does that mean he doesn't have a million subconscious responses to things regarding Will—one's rooted both in his attraction to men and his friendly/romantic/evolving feelings for him? Absolutely not. Half of what drives Mike's S4 narrative was built into his wordless/subconscious actions throughout S3, from the way we see him look disgusted with girls when they're mentioned, the way he take's El's hands off him when she tries to kiss him, and even the way he looks conflicted by her kiss at the very end of the season. Just because Mike is consciously unaware that something is happening to him doesn't mean the thing isn't happening—it just means that Mike himself is oblivious to it.

Even so: Mike being oblivious to the fact that he's attracted to men/in love with Will means he isn't consciously trying to keep himself away from Will—which is clear, if you pay attention to every moment before he gets guilted into remembering he has a GF by Argyle.

Basically, the crux of Mike's own experience with his problems is—

"I don't love El the way I'm supposed to, and it's going to cause problems if I can't do that for everyone I care for,"

not

"I am trying to hide my feelings for boys/Will and have to pretend they aren't there to be normal."

—which is a subtle but critical distinction in understanding both where he is by the end of S4 and where he's headed moving into S5.

Now: I get that it's more fun to imagine a Mike fighting his feelings for Will consciously throughout S4, but....that's Will's story and experience of his feelings, not Mike's. Mike is fighting with his lack of attraction to women more than his attraction to men/Will—which is also why you see it slip out so much despite the time/era/what he knows of what happens to gay men in Hawkins.

If Mike knew he loved Will/boys consciously, he'd be much more afraid of himself and Will than he is even as of the last shot of S4—but he's not, which is shockingly telling if you consider how he already knows what he doesn't feel for Eleven. Once he does know what he feels—his "a-ha" moment about liking Will, the same as his consciously realizing he didn't love El "like that" as of end of S3—it will be impossible for him not to address it in himself...and finally be honest/undo the damage of The Lie he told El (he loved her) during the monologue.

That's the (canonical) trajectory of Mike "The Heart" Wheeler—and why him being oblivious to his feelings for Will, not just "secretly longing without wanting to indulge hope he might have the boy he loves" the way Will is experiencing moving into S5. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[buuniebaby]

Idk if you do this or know what it is but Hamzah twitter links?

oh girl trust me my twitter bookmarks have been waiting for this moment . 😭

HAMZAH TWITTER LINKS. 🎀

warning - literal porn below the cut. enjoy 💝

i simply think this is the kind of video hamzah would send you randomly when you two aren’t together, along with a “wish u were here instead of my fist :(“

when you’re on facetime with hamzah and he’s really pent up, he usually uses his pillow to get off.

he’s alwayss feeling up your body, especially when you’re in his lap.

he will always be a boob guy in my heart.

this video just looked like the podcast couch to me and I thought it was funny .. but the more I think about it the more hot i think that would be - fucking hamzah in a risky place like that, being careful to stay quiet and not make a mess. he thinks of how you were sprawled out under him, taking his cock whenever he records a new episode, trying his best not to get hard from the thought on camera.

him eating u out in those glasses he wears.. he puts all his effort into making u feel good.

again, his hands are always all over your body, especially when you ride him.

his thighs in this video and the way he touches her are sooo hamzahcore

the way hamzah touches you when he’s feeling rough 💗

hamzah thrusting into you, using you like a toy whenever he’s pent up. ugh need

extras:

I’ve already posted this video on its own, but if you havent seen it, it’s soo hamzahcore 💗

this is just a picture I’ve had bookmarked forever but god it’s so hamzahcore. he’s the type of guy to nut just because u have a pretty face

i think about this tweet daily. omg. hamzah pls give me back kisses in doggy

[azrael-777]

pjo hot takes!! (because there’s no better first post to make than a controversial one)

☆ luke castellan was right to be angry (i would’ve been on kronos’ side because of the sole fact that if i were a demigod in that universe, i’d have plenty of reason to be mad at the gods)

★ rachel elizabeth dare did literally nothing wrong besides have a crush on a boy

☆ jason grace is a genuinely interesting character but i think a lot of people tend to not like him because he doesn’t have a super crazy past that gets revealed/he doesn’t get all his memories back so he is forever left as a character with so much potential but there’s nothing mysterious about him. we know only as much as him, no secrets about his past

★ octavian had a right to be mad at the greeks

☆ if rick riordan wrote a character that appears in multiple books, he probably wanted you to at some point have some sort of sympathy or at least understanding of that character no matter how terrible they are. they were written with thought, so think about them.

if you disagree with any of these and want to debate me on it, do it respectfully. or just accept that a difference of opinion is okay sometimes <33

[m1ckeyb3rry]

“CHIAROSCURO” was very well-written! May I request a oneshot of Yuji Itadori within the recent manga chapters? Instead of Choso, the one to protect him from Furnace was the reader, and they have a final “date” in a innate domain of sorts and say their goodbyes before the reader is burned to nothing. Have a good day! 💝

── 1800 DEGREES

Synopsis: By some miracle, you are granted the gift of saying goodbye to Yuji Itadori, one last time.

Event Masterlist

Pairing: Itadori x Reader

Chapter Word Count: 2.0k

Content Warnings: jjk spoilers, angst, character death, nobara is dead fr in this, lots of talk about heat (literally not erotically), reader and yuji’s history is left very vague

A/N: it’s actually criminal how long this has been in my inbox omg i’m so sorry!! but i’m glad you liked chiaroscuro anon and i love your mind for angst HEHE i hope this fits what you were going for!! sorry again that it took a bit 😫 also 1800 degrees fahrenheit is the highest temperature that a typical crematorium’s ovens will be set at so uh reference ig 😓 if you were wondering why the title is so odd

Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own.

It was hot — unbearably so. You could not even sweat, it was that level of scalding, and you knew that within a few moments, you would lose any ability to think, to reason or feel. That meant you had to act now and act quickly, before you lost your final hope at anything resembling a victory.

Yuji, dear Yuji. You had to protect him; it was the only thing you knew, the only thing you could concentrate on as the flames of Sukuna’s Domain licked closer towards you. You could not falter nor flinch. You could only think of him, though this, at least, was nothing difficult — because so many of your thoughts had been occupied by his presence throughout the past year that it was all but a habit at this point for your mind to linger on him.

He was shouting at you. He must’ve been, though you were hardly and dimly aware of it. He never raised his voice at you, but all rules had their exceptions, and this was one such exception, one such circumstance in which even the mild-mannered Yuji Itadori could be driven to screaming at you. 

Only your technique could do it. No other would be of sufficient strength to protect against Sukuna’s fire, but this immense power came with a cost: it could only save one person. That was it. You could only save one person, and every other time you had been selfish and saved yourself, but not today. Today, when you cast that barrier, whose summoning was as learned as it was innate, the shimmering wall did not form around you but, for the first time, sprang up around another person entirely.

You wanted to look at him. You didn’t want to confront Sukuna and give him that satisfaction, and neither were you brave enough to stare at your impending doom with your shoulders squared and your head held high. Instead, you turned your back to it and kept your eyes firmly locked on Yuji’s, smiling in the face of his horror, trying to reassure him with your gaze if not your words that this was your decision, that he was the one who had to do it, because nobody else could. Because you could not, certainly you could not. This was the last thing you could offer him.

Reaching out your hand, you pressed it to the barrier, your fingers splaying against the cursed energy, which had coalesced into a form as solid as diamond. There, you waited, as his muscles trembled, as he shook his head, over and over in a firm denial, his mouth moving like he was rejecting what was happening though it was out of his power to do so. His hand moved despite his stubborn insistence, resting opposite yours in a clear farewell, forehead slamming against the barrier as he tried fruitlessly to get to you.

You wished that, in these final moments, there was not this wall between you. You wished that, if you had to leave him forever, you could hold onto him one last time. You wished that you could say goodbye, properly instead of through this impenetrable barrier.

Then a sensation engulfed you, warm and strong, not burning and anguishing as you had expected. It took you a moment to realize that you were longer in Sukuna’s Domain but instead in a different location, a sweet-smelling meadow dappled with sunlight and wildflowers, and that sensation which you still felt was the tenderness of Yuji’s embrace.

You wanted to ask him: where are we? How is this happening? Is it even real? Are you real? Have these past few months been nothing but a nightmare, and is this then the truth? But all you could do was sniffle, burying your face in his shoulder, pulling yourself closer to his chest and clutching onto him as tightly as you could.

“Y/N,” he whispered, his voice cracking, one of his hands traveling up from your waist to the nape of your neck, clinging to you as tears welled in your eyes and splashed onto his skin. “Y/N, I—”

“I’m frightened,” you said. “Don’t speak about it. I’m very frightened, and I don’t want to — I don’t want to think about it or talk about it or anything. By some miracle, I have been given this last chance to see you, and I don’t want to ruin it by being frightened.”

His nose pressed against your cheek as he inclined his head, a small, choked sound escaping from him. Besides that, he was silent for a while, and then: “I’m sorry for yelling at you earlier.”

“I didn’t hear it,” you said.

“I still did it,” he said. “I’m sorry.”

“I think I can find it in my heart to forgive you,” you said, trying to laugh as best as you could. “Just barely.”

He let you go, though now his hands came to rest on your shoulders, and he was so gentle even when you knew he was falling apart that it brought tears to your eyes anew. You raised your own hand up so that it could trace against the scar by his lip, and he let out a shuddery, achy sigh.

“Is that the only thing you forgive me for?” he said.

“It’s the only thing that bears forgiving,” you said. “Nothing else you’ve ever done is something you should apologize for, so what more could I forgive? Let’s sit.”

Now that you were less bewildered, you took the time to take in your surroundings properly. The clearing you were in was composed more of white and pink than green, a carpet of blooms in many heights sprawling out until they hit the surrounding trees, whose branches arced up towards the sky like they were protecting the two of you. Somewhere in the distance, a creek bubbled happily, but that was the only sound, besides the breeze and Yuji’s soft breathing.

You leaned against Yuji’s shoulder, your eyes fluttering shut as he nervously picked flowers, his fingers ever needing to remain busy, a companion to his racing mind. 

“This is the last time I’ll see you, isn’t it?” he said, the rise and fall of his chest growing progressively quicker. “Because you…you know. It’s goodbye forever, isn’t it?”

“We’re luckier than most,” you said. “At least we get to say goodbye in the first place.”

“Not that lucky,” he said. “We still have to say goodbye, so how can we be lucky?”

“I never said lucky. Just that some people don’t get to say goodbye at all,” you said. “And here we are in such a wonderful place to get to do it.”

“Do you think it’s real?” he said.

“I should be asking you that,” you said. “Is this a trick being played by my mind? Or are we here together? For me it doesn’t matter, but I can’t help hoping that it’s real, or at least that you are. I want you to remember, too.”

“I’ll remember,” he said. “I’ll never forget it. Until the day I die, I’ll remember this. Remember you.”

“If you ever get married and have kids one day, will you tell them about me?” you said. “Not in the sense that you loved me before their mother, or more than her, or anything like that. Just that we were friends, and I saved your life once or twice.”

“We’re not friends, though,” he said.

“No, I suppose we’re not,” you said. 

He nudged you in the side. You peered up at him, his shimmering eyes and the way his nose scrunched so that he could attempt to appear happy, and you raised your eyebrows. He lifted a garland of flowers up, like he was asking for your permission, and when you nodded he set it atop your head like a crown.

“You look like a princess,” he said. “So pretty.”

“I’m relying on you,” you said. “I can’t see myself, so if I look like a fool, then you have to be honest and say as much.”

“I’m telling the truth,” he said. “You’re as beautiful as the day we met. Or even more. I don’t know.”

“I want to go back to that day,” you said. “Go back and relive the past few months in an endless loop, just so I could meet you every time.”

“Even with everything else that happened?” he said.

“Yes,” you said. “Even with everything else that happened. I’d suffer it again and again, just to experience the day I first saw you once more.”

He held your face still with his roughened hands, leaning down and pressing his lips against your own. You sought him out, your hands running through his hair, his rubbing against your jaw, the heat of his mouth different and yet so similar to the way you knew the fire of your death would feel. But this was a fire and a death you could choose, would choose, over and over until there was nothing left of you to burn away.

“It’s not fair,” he said when he pulled away. “Why do you have to leave? Why are you leaving me?”

“I just have to,” you said, fanning yourself as the sun beat down hotter than before. Yuji seemed unaffected, cocking his head at you for the odd behavior, but you only shrugged.

“Why can’t I go with you?” he said.

“You have to stay and protect the rest of the world,” you said. His brow furrowed, and you knew it was the same conflict that warred in him eternally springing to life once again. You did not want for him to be conflicted, though. He could not afford to be, not when everything was resting on his shoulders. “Yuji. Yuji, I’m so hot. Why aren’t you sweating? Why don’t you feel it?”

“What are you talking about?” he said in alarm. You stood, panting, pacing around to dissipate the blistering feeling crawling on your skin. “It’s the same temperature as before. It’s nice out, Y/N. Why are you acting like this?”

But it was not nice anymore, it was like you had been submerged in a vat of boiling water. Walking through the air felt like swimming, and in the corner of your vision, you saw something shimmer. It was a shade of red that you had not seen in so long; unbidden and despite your enduring discomfort, you grinned.

“Yuji,” you breathed. “Yuji, she’s here. It’s Kugisaki!”

“Where?” he said, head whipping about. You pointed at the visage of the girl, who was standing and waiting at the edge of the clearing, her hands folded behind her back and a placid smile on her face. “There’s no one there. Y/N, Y/N, please stop, there’s no one there…”

“She’s there,” you repeated, trying to tug him to his feet and finding that he was stuck by some invisible force. “She’s there.”

“Stop!” he said as you backed away, making his own effort to stand but finding himself unable to. You walked towards where Kugisaki was waiting for you, leaving the struggling Yuji behind. “Y/N, stop! Wait! Just one more minute, just give me that much!”

You turned to look at him one final time. He was reaching out for you, but you knew without really knowing how you did that it was futile. At least for now, he could not reach you. Kugisaki was beckoning you to a place that Yuji could not follow, a place that you did not even want him to.

He shook his head at you, one last, desperate effort that even he must’ve known was doomed to failure. “Please.”

You smiled at him. “Let’s not meet for a while, Yuji. Think about me every now and then, won’t you?”

With that, you took Kugisaki’s hand and allowed her to drag you somewhere far away, where you would never again know pain and the air was cool instead of searing, where you would wait until enough years had passed that you could see Yuji Itadori again.

[icedemi]

ᡣ𐭩 𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐒𝐄𝐗 !

FEATURING: dazai !

SYNOPSIS: dazai almost forgot his birthday?! might as well give him a night to remember forever . . .

CONTENT WARNING(S): NSFW content , MDNI , DOM! READER , SUB! DAZAI!! overstimulation , orgasm denial , kinky sex , gender neutral reader. NOT proofread..

ᡣ𐭩

" 'samu, guess what day ittttt issss! " you cheered, eagerly awaiting his response with your hands hidden behind your back.

— " i dunno, garbage day? shit! don't tell me we forgot to take out the bin again.. " he sighed as he retrieved his phone from his coat pocket.

" ill call atsushi, im sure he wouldn't mind emptying it for us " —

" ah.. not quite.. c'mon silly, take a look at the calendar! "

he turned his head to look at the calendar and noticed the 19th marked with "BIRTHDAY" in pink pen, underlined twice with a bunch of hearts around it.

— " ah so today we celebrate the unfortunate day i was involuntarily brought into this dreadful world..." he joked, his eyes lingering on the calendar before turning his gaze to you with his beautiful brown eyes... how could he look so good talking about depressing shit?? —

" oh, stop sulking and open your gift! " you huff, shoving the wrapped present in his face with a pout.

— he chuckled as he opened his gift, a smile spreading across his face. "awh darling, you shouldn't have..."

as he opened the gift his eyes widened at what he saw inside, he picked it up to reveal a vibrator.. —

" surpriseeee! I was thinking we could pass the time before your surprise party at the agency tonight. " you giggled, hugging his waist while teasingly rubbing your knee over his bulge.

— " my mmfph– s.. surprise party huh..? god 'donna you're so bad at keeping secrets... " —

ᡣ𐭩 —————————————

you two had been at it for hours now, dazai is a complete whimpering, whiny teary-eyed mess! god how cute and pathetic he looks

he's practically shooting blanks at this point, however you don't plan on stopping one bit! infact you even brought in a blindfold and a ball-gag just for him! how sweet of you!!

ever so sweetly dragging the vibrator over his flushed pink tip, occasionally pumping his dick just to watch his gasp and beg for more, desperately thrusting into your hand for release..

... just for you to remove your hand and vibrator

— " fuck! mngh-ph.. 'd-..ah!..donna.. c-cmon don't be so mean... " —

... " y'know, naughty boys who aren't grateful, don't deserve to cum... it's a privilege, not a right.. understand me 'samu? you won't be cumming until i allow you to.. "

he desperately whined, nodding his head ever so slowly before shooting it back as you grab ahold of his cock.

— a-augh!~ nmph~ !

" yeah... you’re a dirty slut, aren’t you? but you’re my dirty slut, isn't that right 'samu..? "

... " im gonna have so much fun breaking you tonight! "

ᡣ𐭩 —————————————

AUTHORS NOTES

— yea ur getting edged !! totally not me just running out of ideas 💔

.. sigh, tysm for voting on this !! it was rlly fun to write and i hope you enjoy it 😓😓

stockholm syndrome w fyodor is coming out tomorrow or friday, just a teeny warning it contains like medical / drug kinks??? idfk he drugs you and youre supposed to like it 😭😭

also should i start writing for other fandoms like hsr?? idk about genshin since i haven't been active since fontaines release 😓. 100% inlove w lyney though.. and fremi omg he's so cute

THANK U FOR READING ILYSM

© icedemi please don't steal, re-upload or translate my work ill cry and sob my eyes out!! reblogs r appreciated and ill literally let you makeout w me /pos

[confirmeddead]

Can we take a second to reflect on the truly f*cked up intimacy that exists between Armand and Daniel - and which might come to exist? Even if we put away the possibility of a past-DM relationship!

Armand potentially spent days - days - looking through Daniel’s mind looking specifically for what makes him fascinating. Looking for the reason behind Louis’ interest. Looking through all of his life, dreams, hopes and shame. All of this then resulting in Armand trying to talk Daniel out of his own life through a nihilistic script specifically tailored to him. Ending with that embrace (as Daniel embraced him as his Death), and him drinking Daniel’s blood, and forever leaving his mark on his neck. Then we have Daniel Molloy, Pulitzer Prize winning journalist who is many things but most importantly a very competent journalist. Someone who is able to listen, gather research and find some version of the truth hidden behind the smoke and mirrors his subjects tries to conjure up in front of them. The Talamasca has sent him detailed files, which we know reveal a lot of the history and horrors of Armand’s life. Will Daniel in the finale use his skills as a journalist and analyze Armand to get to the truth? (As he does with Louis, as already seen). There is basically a level of enforced intimacy between the two, as they have both without the other’s consent learnt a lot(!) about each other. And if speculation is correct and Armand turns Daniel into a vampire this season? Will Armand see Daniel’s life flash before him? And if that is not intimate enough(!) they will then both be left with a bond unlike anything else - which has been shown to literally make maker/fledgling ’feel’ each other, their respective emotions and thoughts. Like what even is this relationship, and can I get more please haha?! If DM didn’t happen in the past will Armand go to drain Daniel and realize as he does so that the boy from the 70’s still finds him absolutely fascinating? (I strongly believe that Armand believes Daniel when he claims to not find him boring in episode five). Daniel is an insatiably curious journalist with an addictive personality (and maybe a little of an adrenaline junkie, no?) - and Armand must surely be a truly fascinating subject, even given what Armand’s done to him (one vampire might not be enough to interview/to come to understand for Daniel…). Will Armand see that and will that be partially what makes him suddenly decide to turn him??? Their chemistry has been interesting since season one and has only become more intriguing and compelling. I have so many thought, many not really coherent - sorry, love you blog! What do you think?

Hi Anon! First off, let me thank you for sending in your thoughts. I really love having conversations with other fans, especially regarding Devil’s Minion and Armand. I’ll set aside the possible past-DM as well, by the way. Buckle up!

There’s something really important being set up for viewers with Armand and Daniel’s relationship. Let’s look at what the show has presented us with. Armand and Daniel’s meeting was, quite possibly, the worst way for two people to meet. Looking into someone so deeply and, through your own selfish reasons (jealousy on Armand’s part), continuing to coax this young man into Death’s arms is inherently messed up. This isn’t something anyone should take lightly, and Daniel doesn’t. Therein lies the odd set up to their eventual maker/fledgling relationship. I love what you say is “enforced intimacy” because that really is what it is!

Daniel’s character is a juxtaposition when most of who we’re seeing are these immortal vampires. He’s our voice when we want to tell off them off, he’s our conscience and sense when we’re presented with lies, horrible situations, and straight up buffoonery. Putting this man in the same room with The Not-So-Master Manipulator Armand is going to give us some amazing results. He isn’t a 20 year old who will welcome Death with open arms, he’s a bright reporter with just about every point of view a human can have gone through at this point. And this is what will perk Armand’s interest.

I fully believe Armand finds Daniel fascinating already. I don’t think he saw it in SF, marred by his own feelings with Louis, but was open to the idea of trying to see it for the sake of Louis. There’s a huge part of Armand that wants to serve someone, wants a teacher, wants a leader. The teacher part being something he knows he seeks- he sought it in Louis. Louis’ big appeal to others is his humanity, something Armand lacks but craves. And Daniel, not intentionally, is going to give Armand this dynamic he seeks to give him purpose to keep living.

Older Daniel has decades under his belt with his profession and his personal history. Aging up Daniel and having him be this well-respected journalist is probably the smartest thing the writers could have done for the ~bigger picture~ in regards to Armand’s storyline (since he’s such a big player in TVC). We the viewers are presented with someone intelligent, strong-willed, and cutthroat. What can Armand gain from being with someone like that? Literally everything. He’s not a replacement for Marius, Lestat, or Louis. He’s something Armand genuinely needs after everything he’s gone through (and put himself through, let’s be honest). I’ll rehash one of my previous theories that Daniel isn’t the Boy we met in the books who went a little crazy after being turned- our Daniel is a fighter- and he should be ringside on Team Armand. A coach, a shoulder to lean on, an active listener.

So present-day Dubai

I think after everything is said and done in Dubai, Daniel will find the vulnerability in his next subject. He’ll have cracked Armand but will be shocked to find the soft(ish) interior. Daniel will see Armand for who he really is- someone stuck in a loop of their own trauma but also someone with real feelings and love to give. Not just a monster manipulator. Still that scared boy from Delhi, maybe, but not a lost cause. Never.

I’d really love a callback to 2x05. No, Daniel isn’t going to talk Armand onto the ledge, he’s going to be what Louis was to him. You’re not unworthy of love, you’re not hopeless, you’ve made it this far and you’ll continue enduring. These words will hold you up and carry you.

[lavenderarts]

LRB I’m being so deadass when I say I’m happier and safer and more secure in my relationships for deciding to live by the idea that things that weren’t said to me outright were not said and are therefore not my damn problem. For the first time in my 28 years of life I know people I have never had an argument with, EVER, because when something is going on we talk about it instead and it doesn’t become emotionally heated and hurtful. Like I try to look back and think of a time my best friend hurt my feelings and there just. isn’t one. For the first time, I have no laundry list of grievances I can never address because all the people in my life refuse to tell me when I’ve upset them and expect me to never get upset with them and lash out at me if I ever need something.

I’ve spent my life going from one abuser to the next with no one to truly support or look out for me or tell me I deserved more, I felt like an emotional dairy cow — I was always expected to lavish care and attention onto my ‘friends’ and never get mad at them and just accept it when they lashed out at me for things beyond my control or mistakes they never told me about. I was supposed to take it and continue to nurture, to solve all their problems unendingly, because they were going through a hard time or struggling with unmedicated mental health issues or simply didn’t know how to behave yet so it wasn’t their fault; and if I ever had a need in return I was tossed in the garbage because I was not allowed to want support or care. Do you know how crazy it feels to go from 2 decades of that to suddenly being faced with someone who is proud of you for setting boundaries? To someone who earnestly celebrates your accomplishments instead of getting bitterly jealous that you’re better at something than they are? To someone who defends you when you’re not around and won’t allow people in their life to disrespect you for the sake of keeping peace? To someone who you know, without a doubt, will be in your life forever instead of feeling your grip on a relationship slowly slipping away and everything spiraling out of control around you because your usefulness has run out and you didn’t get the memo you were no longer wanted?

It’s insane. You can just decide, anytime you like, to stop doing the emotional labor of divining other people’s feelings via magic. You can set a standard that people either tell you when an issue has come up so you can properly apologize and work out a solution together or they can solve it themselves, but you won’t be taken to task for problems you weren’t informed existed. And you can simply remove people who don’t follow that from your life. Obviously you can’t be mean and uncompromising — you have to hold yourself to the same standard you’re demanding, and you have to be honest without being insulting or manipulative. You’re being honest for the health of the relationship, not to be unkind. You can still intuit; if I think I might’ve hurt someone’s feelings you can literally just ask. You can say “Hey, I feel like I might have upset you earlier, did I? If so I’d really like to apologize and talk about it a little bit” and that’s not inappropriate. You’ll come across people who REALLY do not fucking like that and will try to make you feel like you’re demanding or dramatic or weird for it — I did, and getting told that I’m “too much” for expressing my opinions confidently and wanting honest communication in my relationships almost broke me — but you aren’t. You’re making a choice that is right for you. People aren’t obligated to stick around if they can’t understand and respect that choice.

I don’t act like this because I don’t trust people, it’s the opposite: I trust other adults to handle their emotions like adults and be able to assess if my friendship with them is worth the discomfort of an open conversation every now and again. I trust my loved ones to tell me if I hurt them and allow me the opportunity to apologize and modify my behavior. It’s because I trust people that I require this level of frankness, and if that trust is broken and I’m not confident it can be repaired, we go our separate ways. Easy.

You can just do all this. You’ll find people who fuck with it. Stop being a fucking doormat and find people who love you, not just how you serve them.

I can’t thank my friends enough for loving me and being willing to be honest with me. I never want to go back to how alone I felt, and being supported and cared for by you makes me sure I’ll never have to.

[666writingcafe]

Strange Behavior

A Text Conversation Between MC and Solomon

MC: Asmo's acting weird.

Solomon: How so?

MC: Ever since Simeon and Luke arrived at the House, he's been spacing out frequently and looking rather sad, and yet whenever I ask him what's wrong, he brushes me off and quickly changes the topic, trying way too hard to seem upbeat.

Solomon: I see. Perhaps he's homesick.

MC: That's what I'm thinking. He probably doesn't feel right being here in the Devildom. Unfortunately, him returning to the Celestial Realm is out of the question.

Solomon: I can relate to Asmo on a certain level. While I miss the place where I was born sometimes, I've lived too long a life for it to still be recognizable to me. But unlike our demon friend, I'm not sure I want to go back even if it WAS the exact same place I left.

Solomon: The only reason I would is to witness the nature there one last time. It was the sort of place where the earth and the sky seemed to go on forever. The vast meadows, the deep blue sky, the shadows that fell over the valley...it was truly magical.

MC: If circumstances were different, I'd have liked to go visit it with you, but I understand if the memories are too painful to retread.

Solomon: *blushing crow sticker*

Solomon: The last time I was in my hometown was also when I first met Asmo. I'd come back home after being away for several decades, and I decided to pop in a local tavern to grab something to drink. Asmo was sitting at the bar, drunk beyond belief.

MC: Good or bad?

Solomon: ??

MC: Was he having a good time or not?

Solomon: OH!

Solomon: He was rather depressed. Apparently a human he'd been pursuing rejected him, and so he was sobbing uncontrollably. I couldn't help but feel sorry for him, so I tried talking to him. That was a choice I immediately regretted, because once he started talking, he just wouldn't stop, and I hadn't intended on staying at the tavern for very long.

MC: That sounds about right.

Solomon: The good news is that I was able to propose forging a pact with him, and the rest, as they say, is history.

MC: *shocked crow sticker*

Solomon: What?

MC: No wonder this version of Barbatos doesn't like you.

Solomon: Now what's THAT supposed to mean? *angry emoji*

MC: You LITERALLY took advantage of someone while they were drunk!

Solomon: It wasn't like I slept with him!

MC: It doesn't matter, Solomon. You shouldn't have made a pact with him while he was drunk and heartbroken.

Solomon: I didn't think I'd have another chance.

MC: Save your excuses.

Solomon: Well, OBVIOUSLY I wouldn't do that sort of thing now, MC.

MC: Really? *eye roll emoji*

Solomon: Yes, really.

MC: Prove it.

Solomon: What?

MC: I dare you to make a pact with Asmo without manipulating him into it.

Solomon: While we're here???

MC: YES

Solomon: I suppose that wouldn't interfere with the timeline TOO much...just as long as I still have my seventy-two pacts when we return, it shouldn't really matter what order they occur in.

MC: I'm being serious, Solomon.

Solomon: I know. You didn't exactly consent to all your pacts, so I can only imagine how Asmo might have felt when he sobered up and realized what he'd done.

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr

[bismuth-209]

Has anyone else noticed how Ruby does not have a dad?

They have been going on and on about her birth mum. And maybe, in Church on Ruby Road there's a mention they don't know who her parents are. I don't actually recall. Pretty sure that's it though, in terms of references to her father. (Happy to be corrected if i'm misremembering)

But since then? It's Ruby's mum this, Ruby's mum that. Especially in the last episode I found it,, noticeable how everyone seemed to be ignoring that it typically takes two to tango.

Jazz is about the notes you don't play or something

But also looking at Ruby's lived experience, not just how she came to be

Carla (Ruby's real mum imo) mentions in, i think 73 yards, she's never had a boyfriend/male partner. She has had a girlfriend during Ruby's childhood, which to me makes the lack of stepfather all the more noticeable

Cherry supposedly had a husband named Desmond Sunday. This is what the tardis wiki told me, without any direction for a source, i'm guessing a novelisation? If anyone knows more about Desmond Sunday I'd be interested to know if he ever meets Ruby. Because I'm guessing they don't meet, and her life has just been entirely void of anything resembling a father figure forever.

Like. it feels as though there's big neon signs telling you to go left. Go left, investigate the mystery of Ruby's mom. There's nothing for you if you go right. Nope, nothing interesting here. Literally nothing.

It's like a perception filter almost. Not technically invisible but you're just urged to glaze your eyes over.

[midwestprincesss]

PARTNERS IN CRIME | chapter 1

pairing: enemies to lovers patrick zweig x female!reader summer camp au

summary: after graduating highschool, both you and patrick look for a summer job. you, because you wanted to save some money before college. and him because he needed a place to sleep. you thought you finally got rid of him forever, after highschool. but it's patrick zweig, so c'mon.

a/n: it's a biiiit short i knoww but i'm tired so YEAH! sorry! loveu guys tho!!!!!!!!

contents: uh. some talk ab masturbation, patrick has a crusty cum sock but are we surprised, reader is literally patrick, they can't stand eachother but they also wanna fuck eachother, blahblahblah

taglist: @jackierose902109 @primlovesdilfs

prologue

''wake up.'' you heard a voice. a guy's voice. it took you a while to actually wake up and realize it was patrick, leaning against your door frame.

you groaned and threw your pillow at him. ''get the fuck out!''

he chuckled and picked up the pillow, throwing it back at you with more force. ''it's 8am. you have to get up, like, now.''

''ugh! why are you even in my room, zweig? have you been watching me or something? you fucking perv. go away!''you yelled, pulling the blanket over your head. and of course the fucker had to walk over to your bed and pull the blanket off of you.

''look, it's not my fault we got paired up in the same cabin. now if you stopped being a fucking bitch for once and got up, that would be great. we have to do the whole initiation bullshit with all those kids. get out of the fucking bed.'' he said and slammed the door.

it was an actual nightmare come true. patrick never had any concept of personal space, but you thought that maybe it was just a phase. turns out it wasn't. he looked almost ready to get into bed with you-but only so that he could push you off of it. not that you wished he would get into bed with you to do something else- no, ew. you'd sleep with anyone but patrick zweig.

but he did look good. and even though you didn't want to admit it, you knew it. he's tall, muscular and handsome. perhaps that contributes to your hatred for him. you couldn't stand it when he looked at you with those doe-like green eyes of his. or when he bit his lip at the most inappropiate times. or the way the muscles in his legs flexed when he was running. or how nice his freckles look.

but you were not attracted to patrick, god no. these were just little exceptions.

well, maybe this morning was an exception as well. the way he spoke to you turned you on, weirdly. he seemed so pissed off- he looks hot when he's angry. maybe that's why you get a kick out of annoying him.

you finally rolled out of bed with a groan, checking the time. it was, in fact, not 8 am, as patrick had told you, but 7:30. the fucker.

you decided on not going back to sleep anymore- mostly because you weren't that sleepy anymore but also because you didn't want to let your thoughts about patrick wander. the most ridiculous and embarassing thing would be to jerk off while thinking about that smug little bitch. you would have good excuses though- it was morning, you were just horny, blah blah blah. but still, the aftermath of it all would have been the most humbling experience ever so you decided it was best to just skip all of it.

after doing no efforts in making your bed, you headed to the bathroom to brush your teeth and put on a bit of makeup, then you put on a pair of shorts and a stupid t-shirt with the name of the camp on it. and just when you were about to leave the cabin, you noticed patrick's door was slightly open. would it realyyy be that bad if you looked around his room a bit?

no, it wouldn't. he barged into your room while you were still in there, sleeping, without even knocking. so it can't be worse than that.

you opened the door and looked around. it smelt like axe body spray and cigarettes. you looked up at the smoke detector and obviously it was covered with a shower cap. it was such a patrick thing to do. then, you noticed the fact that he hadn't made his bed. also a very patrick thing. but then you remembered your bed looks exactly the same so you quickly found something else to focus on- the fucking sock next to his bed. just one, singular sock on the floor- gross. so. fucking. gross. to think he was jerking his shit in a room right next to yours- just straight up gross. not hot- not hot at all. it's actually disgusting to think about him slowly stroking his big, throbbing dick with pretty moans falling from his lips (such a shame you didn't hear them). what was he thinking about? about you, maybe. but you hope it wasn't you, 'cause that would definitely not be hot- not at all.

when you opened the door you found patrick in front of the cabin, checking his phone.

you sighed, loudly, so that he could hear you. he did not react. you did it again- but still, no reaction from him.

you decided to break the silence. '' why the fuck did you come here? did you know i was gonna be here? your parents are fucking rich. you're basically swimming in money there, at your house. why couldn't you stay there?'' you snapped at him, slightly surprising yourself. you did plan on having this conversation with him, but you didn't expect it to happen so soon. it was like you were speaking without actually wanting to.

''wouldn't you like to know.'' he deadpanned, then continued to type something on his phone.

you stared at him, tapping your foot. ''you checking if i replied to that text you sent me three days ago? 'cause i didn't. and just so you know, i was not smiling at you.''

''it looked like you were. i bet you missed me.'' he finally looked up from his phone but without making eye contact with you yet. he was smirking. again. you felt like punching him. again.

''zweig, i swear if you don't shut up-''

''make me shut up, then.'' he said. so fucking cheesy.

''your stupid pick-up lines don't work on me. you're not gonna turn me into one of your fangirls'' you warned him, inching closer and closer to him. ''and by the way, i'll get back at you for waking me up earlier. you're a fucking cunt.''

he didn't reply anything. he just looked directly into your eyes, with his eyebrows slightly raised. it was almost like his face was screaming, punch me! punch me!

you ignored your violent urges- you figured it would be better to put all that energy into something else- maybe, instead of punching him, you could flood his room- something of the sort.

but of course, that would be quite impossible given the fact that you would have to pay actual money for the damage. so, maybe punching was still an option, but not yet.

''i'm starving. i'll go get some breakfast.'' you said as you started walking away. ''-and don't try to sit next to me at the table. it's enough i have to sleep in the same cabin as you- i don't want to be reminded of your gross eating habits.'' pickles and peanut butter, disgusting. you remember how patrick used to eat that, in the school cafeteria- like actually. and with people around him. and still- he got girls. somehow.

he immediately came running after you, laughing a bit- ''oh come on, i don't eat that shit anymore, i was like 15 back then. and plus- i don't know anyone around here-'' he tried to make a point, but you cut him off with a loud and clear 'no.' he sighed and rolled his eyes at that, but ended up sitting on the opposite side of the table.

the whole time you were having breakfast you could feel his eyes on you. only this time, he wasn't smirking or grinning or anything of the sort- he just looked like a lost puppy.

it almost made you feel bad.

[nekropsii]

im so glad you watched i saw the tv glow i needed someone who is capable of critical analysis to watch that damn film. the amount of people saying the movie is "about a cis man learning to come to terms with his inner femininity" is crazy. the amount of people ignoring the gender stuff ALL TOGETHER to say its a movie "about dissociation" is crazy. hell on earth forever

This is probably the most depressing ask I've ever received. I literally cannot conceive of the idea of reading I Saw The TV Glow as anything other than exactly what it is... It's really, really obvious about what's happening, even if it doesn't say it in direct, precise words.

How can you watch that film and not realize what it's telling you?

The specific misinterpretation of the "I think I like TV Shows" scene as representative of the Aro/Ace/AroAce experience that I called out is... While it's a really myopic read that fails to take into account the broader context of the rest of the film, it's at least not a take that on its face denies every other part of the movie. I can at least understand it as simply being myopic and not outright idiotic - perhaps those under that genuine belief simply have no concept of the fact that unaddressed Gender Dysphoria can really ruin your relationship with your sexuality.

But to read the whole film as being about a Cis Man in any regard, or about Dissociation... I truly cannot help but feel that that's a malicious read - deliberately so, even. The outright refusal to acknowledge the existence and experience of Transfems + Transfemininity, especially when it's not cute or sexy or marketable, or said as loudly and explicitly as physically possible, is heinous.

Another thing that really hurts to see is the amount of people referring to the main character exclusively as her deadname, or exclusively with male pronouns... Stating that they're using them because she "never verbalized any alternatives". As if she wasn't called Isabel, and as if this whole movie isn't about her fighting for her fucking life with her Transfemininity, and how she's never been safe or comfortable enough to accept it. Of course she's never verbalized any alternatives, or said "I would prefer you use she/her pronouns on me, please," or "My name isn't ████! It's Isabel!", the fucking film is about how she's never been able to accept her own identity. It's about how she's suffocating to death in the suburbs, dying in a body that isn't hers, trapped in an identity that isn't hers, living her whole life miserable because that life isn't hers. It's about the misery of that feeling of being trapped, drowning in What Ifs, never being able to truly look at the sun directly out of fear. It's about how There Is Still Time, even if you think it's too late for you. No fucking shit she didn't verbalize her preferred name and pronouns. Fuck. What the fuck.

Let's all start killing people. Does that sound good to anyone else right now? We should start hitting people with cars and rocks and such.

[buddielifers]

If they really don’t end up using that particular plot for Buddie and have Buck realize he’s comfused and misplaced feelings for Eddie, then I will forever hate it.

If it was suppose to be some sort of red herring/making the people think it was Eddie. Then that is actually fucked up in my mind. The show knows how much people love Buddie and want them together. It was literally spoken about after, like Buck kissed a man and it wasn’t Eddie people were talking about it. So, if they really did use Eddie just to fuel bucktmmy that’s just cruel especially since they could have easily done it any other way without involving Eddie.

I also hate and still feel weird that Buck was suppose to have maimed Eddie FOR A LOVE INTEREST. I know Eddie didn’t feel like Buck needed to apologize and they both felt bad but Buck’s never hurt Eddie especially for a LI.

So, if they don’t write it as part of a buddie outcome pissed won’t even be my only reaction.

[fkapommel]

A Rant about Bridgerton s3 from a person who doesn't care about Bridgerton

I'm just a hater who is an optimist at heart. On Polin, the Mondrich's, Michaela Stirling, and Cressida.

I haven't read the Bridgerton books, and I don't believe there is any validity to a "but this isn't book accurate!" argument because Bridgerton the Show was marketed as a diverse, representational adaptation that liked the bones of Quinn's idea but made something better. And I, a lay person, have never seen as much virtroil and hatred towards the showrunners as I have seen this season using that exact argument that has never been uttered before because, near unanimously, all fans agreed that the showrunners were making a better story that 90s Quinn ever could. So many people, readers and non-readers alike, were disappointed with the handling of this season.

Peneolope and Colin

Polin was ignored during THEIR season for conventionally "pretty" and "thin" romances. There was zero character growth for either Penelope or Colin individually and as a couple in their own season. We are never shown why Colin loves Peneolope or why he has grown to appreciate her Whistledown project beyond dialogue - "I've learned that they are both you" what the hell does that even mean. Most of the season is spent with them physically apart making dumb faces at each other at dances with no cinemagraphric tension being built - few body closeups, boring musical cues, meaningless and repetitive body/facial choreography (I'm looking at you, open-mouthed contoured Colin) - when all this and more were utilized successfully in Anthony and Kate's season. People were thirsty as fuck to watch a white man get fucked by a darker skinned woman (as was i), but not even the showrunners could be assed about the romance between their only plus-sized character and a Bridgerton. We spent more time building up Francesca's relationship with Kilmartin over penting up Peneolope's romance - her feelings of tragedy, hopelessness. Peneolope has always been overlooked and truly believed that was her fate forever - even nearly agreeing to a marriage that would literally leave her ignored for years on end - and that was the central tension of the season. She knows who she is, she knows that she is love-worthy, talented, and intelligent, but will Colin? DOES Colin? Oh, he does, and he randomly decides that mid-way through the season. And then fumbles her so hard to the point of insulting her very character - calling her manipulative and scheming after they slept together - when the true authorship of Whistledown is revealed. There was not enough tension built nor sustained to carry his hatred for his wife during those episodes, and no, a couple shots where he looks at his very hot wife and thinks "damn, she is hot" is enough.

This season we should have seen what his mother told him - that he is incredibly self-sacrificial and puts other people's (his quoted siblings') happiness before him - in action during Pen and his plot to get a suitor. That device could have been both means and method of Colin's realization that Pen was his true match all along by being forced to list her accolades, scrutinize her face and body for physical compliments and inticements in order to hype her up for other suitors and recognizing her intelligence and manner of speak in Whistedown because of their newfound constant proximity instead of having to be told about her authorship and realizing off-screen their similarity (which, I'll mention, has never been demonstrated in all three seasons. As a person who writes very different to how they speak, I understand that there is some grace to be had here, but Penelope's dialogue does not include any Whistledownisms at ALL and there absolutely should be some demonstrable similarities, especially this season.) That's how Colin could have NOTICED her. In all, their romance was extremely fumbled in favor of having "prettier," "skinnker" bodies on screen because the showrunner had no faith in Nicola's verified abilities in being a leading lady in a larger body (which isn't even plus-sized UGH different argument). Pen has been in love with Colin since the Featherington's "moved in next door" - where was any of that? We learn more about Kate Sharma's childhood in her season than we do about Polin's, the season where its plot important. No flashbacks, no reminescing, no reasons given why Pen even liked Colin in the first place (could he have done something for her, perhaps noticing her in some character-important way, and thats why she developed a crush? No. He's simply a cute guy next door.) We don't even reminisce on Colin's recent worldly travels that, at the start of the season, have completely transformed him into a lady's man or taught him how to assume that character-type. We don't see Pen's life without him to contrast with her life with him back, but different. We don't see the strain on Colin trying to hold up this facade of being a confident womanizer, nor do we see any consequence of his womanizing, just distant shots of jealous Pen. Why be different, why be different now, what shaped and taught his transformation? Did he think of Pen when he was gone? All important questions that would've better characterized him.

Colin magically realizes he's been tortured for a few days seeing Pen talk with Debling a few times (who is completely forgotten about in Pt 2 holy shit I totally forgot about him), then is so mean to her realizing she's Whistledown, then magically falls in love with her again, and then oop- there's babies. Which i guess wasn't a surprise, but rubbed me the wrong way as neither of Polin has talked about wanting kids at all. In all other seasons, we see our pair demonstrate their abilities as viscountess or duchess, and we see them discuss the importance of having children plus an understanding of what it's like being parents. We didn't get any of that from Polin and seeing them suddenly thrust into parenthood was a shock to their characterization. They're love story is allowed to be juvenile, girl-/boy-next-door fantasizing, and rushing past Penelope's pregnancy and their transformation into parents was needless, leaving more questions than answers.

Mondriches

Why, the hell, was the Mondrich's selling their bar so goddamn important to this season?? This show is called Bridgerton, about the Bridgertons, but we have sacrificed necessary screen time on Colin Bridgerton's characterization and romance with Pen for filler than ultimately means nothing! He sells the bar anyway! This show was billed on meaningful representation of its diverse cast. You can't just make a nothing burger conflict about if this Black family suddenly thrust into being titled when the husband is weirdly attached to a bar where he serves whisky to his majority white clientelle. A Black family suddenly needing to learn the rules and decorum of the nobility is an interesting storyline in the world of Bridgerton, which characterizes itself has post-racial. Learning all the minute rules of etiquette is crafted to be impossible to an outsider, so how does this family of outsiders learn it? Where is the conflict that their inheritance rests on their child becoming the legal head of the family? There is so much to be explored here. In this concept rests a meaningful and emotionally convincing plot, but all we got was "Dude you need to sell your bar." "But I don't wanna! ............... I sold my bar." If youre going to waste screen time on one of the very few depictions of a plus-size character finding love that doesn't center her weight in its conflict, at least make it not so fucking boring.

Michaela Stirling and Francesca

And finally. Here we get to Michaela Sterling, who, based on the audience reaction, came on screen, showed her whole vag, killed beloved character Michael Sterling with a chainsaw, and hypnotized innocent Francesca Bridgerton in lesbianism. Good God people. Get a grip.

As a person not in the fandom, I have never seen this level of disgust and anguish over an adaptational change than to the introduction of Michaela Stirling. To anyone who hates this change and loves Mr. "Im going to tie you to the bed until you get pregnant": you already have that. No one is taking the books away from you. But a television adaptation of the books is not FOR you, it's for a whole new audience that pays homage to the original readership. If you cannot handle this change, stop watching.

To all of the television viewers who make a monolith of this outcry, accusing all nay-sayers of homophobia: get a grip. It is indeed emotionally difficult to see your beloved books get a poor adaptation or when screen adapters make changes that you see will make the narrative weaker. Literally every fandom that has had an adaptation has acted this way once or twice. And readers make some important concerns for the impending narrative! By introducing Michaela right after an entire season of this slow, easy, quiet romance between Francesca and John, the show has retroactively trashed every time that Fran has assured her family that she is truly in love with her now-husband (a fact that is important when that said husband is to be lost in the coming seasons). Fran and Stirling were demonstrating a real, true love that differed from the steamy, bodice-ripping lust the concept of Bridgerton was founded on. Their love was, may I remind you, incredibly popular to neurodivergent viewers who saw many traits of ND represented in Fran's character and her relationship with John. Her constant conflict with her mother and the queen who doubted that their love was valid because it did not behave in the same sensual way theirs had and then Violet's eventual approval of their relationship is important representation for love not based on lust and sexuality but on shared psychologies and interests. So far in Bridgerton, it has been illustrated that the only correct and long-lasting type of marriage is one based in wanting to fuck the pants off your partner; JoFran complicates this narrative. By then introducing Michaela and having Fran stutter over her words in compliance to Violet's memory of "forgetting the most familiar of words" when meeting her husband completely erases everything JoFran fought for and meant. "Wait, on second though, everything that these two characters stood for was in fact wrong and being so horned up that you forget your name is the only true start to a fulfilling relationship." This alludes to an eventuality that Fran's personality will be altered even more, that more parts of Francesca are indeed wrong and need to be changed for her to live a fulfilling marriage. (Yes, I understand that this has not happened yet, but the complete reversal of her relationship that she championed for an entire season makes one wary that even more is on the horizon). Further, Francesca's narrative is centralized around grief. How can that be actualized in the show if she falls out of love with her husband before her marriage night, when she's already lusting after her cousin by marriage? The Micheala introduction as it is in season 3 completely rewrites Francesca's character in the show and foreboding for an even greater change in seasons to come. There is an in-narrative issue with Michaela that is not reducible to homophobia but a genuine concern for the narrative.

Secondly, I have seen some people state that miffed viewers are upset about Francesca's bisexuality but not Eloise's implied lesbianism because they were comforted by Eloise's adherence to gay stereotypes, such as her "militant" feminism, her "not-like-other-girls" black sheepism, her hatred and disgust of men and the institution of marriage, and her constant, deep, near-homoerotic relationships with women. Francesca, in contrast, is princessly, beautiful in the same manner as Daphne, modest and sexually inhibited, concerned with feminine pursuits including marriage, and has not expressed an interest in women until her introduction to Michaela. To these people I say this: stop giving television showrunners so much grace. Michaela's introduction was meant as a shock to the audience. It was not meant to retroactively construct Francesca as a bisexual, locked in a tower of heterosexuality. It was meant to drum up just as much media buzz as it has. It is a hook for the next season meant to draw in new viewers - a queer audience scrounging for representation in the carpet hairs - and their run-of-the-mill audience member who pointed at their TV, exclaimed WHAT!?, and who is now hooked to discover how this new plotline will play out in the next season. It will keep their audience curious for however many years it takes for B4 to come out. Look me in the eyes and tell me that you were not surprised by Fran's sudden bisexuality. There is a reason that Eloise's stereotypicality is shorthand for gay, and the fact that Benedict and now Fran have been confirmed as bisexual if not homosexual lessens the probability that Eloise's narrative will be queered. Bridgerton creators do not care about true representation, they care about providing for a wide enough audience. That's why we only got canon queer characters (and queer sex) until the end of s3 - when people were already hooked. But they can only include so much before people are turned away. Think to yourself, why has there been no main dark-skinned, or truly plus-sized, or blemished, or disabled, or asexual, or poor, or effiminate man, or butch woman, or trans* love interest? It's because diversity and representation have limits.

Queer people deserve good representation, and we deserve for that representation to be narratively treated well. We do not deserve shock marketing or the ruining of hard built plot and characterization so that creators can win Diversity Bingo. (Likewise, this goes for racial diversity as well).

Forgotten Cressida

And lastly, and most shortly, what the fuck did they do with poor Cressida. I have never been more let down by the show than how they villanized, then sympathized with, and then shipped off Cressida to a doom of her worst nightmares when her storyline could have genuinely be salvaged by inhabiting the Whistledown role - being an outcast, but a respected one that is still flits about society - or by allying herself more with Eloise and leaning on her for support. But no. She is forgotten by society, by her family, and the only person she has ever called a friend, who was in the perfect position to be a queer provider for her. That shit hurted.

[nightcolorz]

Hehe what are your thoughts on trans Armand and/or t4t devils minion? Personally, it’s a favourite of mine :3

AMAZING QUESTION, I think it’s real as hell. In the books Armand’s whole deal, feeling estranged from masculinity and manhood because he’s forever an adolescent and rarely perceived as a man socially, believing his estrangement makes him unable to identify with manhood bcus his experiences don’t align with it, asking Daniel to explain things about the masculine perspective to him bcus he wants to feel like he’s a part of it, forever either being perceived as feminine or immature bcus his body is trapped in that awkward stage where he doesn’t align fully with anything, all of that is TRANS AS HELL, so the head canon makes a huge amount of sense. I feel like all Anne rice vampires r in some way metaphorically or thematically trans, so making that metaphor literal with a headcanon is super cool. And smth about Daniel reads as trans to me, idk why lol, maybe cuz most transmascs ik have weird sex thoughts about blood and violence 🙏. So in conclusion t4t devils minion canon, also nightcolorz approved lmao

[clericsong]

sunday and robin ramblings 🕊

long post ahead containing some thoughts on sunday and robin because i'm really obsessed with them.

to start this, i want to talk about how self-sacrificial sunday is. even going past his plan where he literally intends to suffer to create paradise in true jesus figure fashion, robin mentions that while she confides in and receives support from sunday, he doesn't tell her anything. in her letter, we see her being concerned for him because she knows he's so overworked as well, taking on so much on his own, and from the robin pc, we see how much he tried to bear his loneliness in her absence. it's clear he didn't want to worry or burden robin, but i also believe he was doing this to prepare for his role past a certain point.

i headcanon that this self-sacrificial nature partly from witnessing his mother's death and having a survivor's guilt reaction to it, as well as a protectiveness for his last living family, robin- feeling guilt perhaps that his mother could not be saved, he's determined to do protect robin from the same fate, at the cost of his 'unworthy' life; (once again, this is mostly inferred) the belief of this unworthiness may stem not only from wishing his mother had been saved instead, but also the way his inability to effectively protect robin as he wants- from her audience, from getting shot, then 'murdered'- is dangled over him time and time again, thus highlighting his failure properly parent her in their mother's place. this nature of his is then further cultivated by gopher wood to fit his agenda; i am also of the belief that he purposely encouraged the divide between the siblings, specifically robin's differing philosophy (it's shown he was indoctrinating sunday specifically with the teachings of the order as opposed to robin who was taught the odes of harmony), then her career and absence from her brother's side, in order to further isolate sunday so he could groom him (grooming is not always sexual in nature btw, and what happened to sunday counts, especially since we see how he tries to hold onto harmony but is swayed over to the order).

and building off of that, i think it shows a paradox in sunday's sense of self-worth: with his monologue on it against the individualistic philosophy of the strong exploiting the weak, sunday is collectivist to the point of self-effacement, and yet he's extremely isolated in that he cannot trust in or rely on anyone, not even his sister. he's so ready to throw himself under the bus for "the greater good," and yet he also cannot believe in a world that isn't under his control.

and that brings me to robin, who embodies the very contradiction in sunday's logic: hope and kindness, the humanity in helping one another that ties us all together in true harmony. robin, who even in opposing sunday, cares for him so much that she asks him to reconsider his plan bc she does not want him to compromise himself. who embraces him in his defeat, and searches for him afterward. it feels as if when she challenges him during the boss fight is the first time it occurs to him that there's someone who would wish for his salvation and happiness as well, that robin loves him too much to let him do this to himself. he was ready to make a perfect world for her where she wouldn't need his support, a paradise where she would forever be shielded, but robin's core is helping people; she wouldn't be satisfied with an escapist fantasy where she's detached from the people she wants to help, and that includes him. she never stops reaching for him.

we have already heard countless times how despite robin's caged bird imagery, sunday is the truly caged bird in his isolation and ideology, along with the sort of world he seeks to create, emphasized further by his design elements (especially in contrast to robin): pierced wings, a set of wings that can't be spread, a more covered up, stiff, confined design, etc. but i'd like to add another inversion: in robin's teaser, we see that sunday is the one crying between them. i like to think this detail was intentional: even if sunday tries to be strong, and does everything to protect robin, he is resultantly the more vulnerable of the two siblings, or rather "the weaker": restricted by his position in the family, isolated without a support system, exploited by the strong through gopher wood's grooming, and made to suffer for the sake of a paradise for others. meanwhile robin is the stronger of the two: she comes out of her trauma with her own wounds, but rises from them with a renewed will to help others, she questions the role she's put in, she breaks out of her confines as an idol to do humanitarian work, and even wakes from ena's dream on her own. and once again, she never stops reaching out for sunday, embodying her very philosophy, whereas sunday contradicts his own philosophy in that to create his paradise, "the weak," in this case being himself, must suffer.

but sunday also contradicts his philosophy in a different way. he believes in a cruel world where the strong and individualistic take advantage of the weak, and yet there's someone who wishes to help others so much he is ready to damn himself for their happiness, someone who, despite being misguided, feels so much responsibility over helping the weak, someone who has unconditionally supported his sister without seeking anything in return. perhaps robin has such strong convictions in people helping each other because she witnessed it from him.