#but a superior telling of the story because i actually FELT the love and magnetism between the characters that i think was rather lacking

[septembersghost]

the silence that only comes when two people understand each other

[missgeniality]

Opaline Moon (m)

“The Moon can never breathe, but it can take our breath away with the beauty of its cold, arid orb.” - Munia Khan

➺ Banner: @hobiandsprite​ 💕

➺ Pairing: Seokjin x Female Reader

➺ Trope: Friends to Lovers, Idol!AU

➺ Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff

➺ Rating: 18+

➺ Word Count: 11.2k

➺ Summary: You are ingrained to love Jin, right upto the blood that courses through your veins. Confessing, however, is a whole other game. So it’s a good thing you’re bad at keeping your hands to yourself, because happenstance can handle the rest. 

➺ Warnings: talks about dance floor fucking, making out in the bar bathroom, fingering, pussy slapping, passing out drunk, daydreams about thigh riding, reader masturbates, they make out A LOT, neck kissing, a hickey, nipple play, some biting, cum eating (kind of, you’ll see), blowjob, protected sex!, reader and jin are corny, the hurt is real but the sex is real-er

➺ Author’s Note: My lovely, lovely moots - @taegularities​, @kithtaehyung​ and @baepsaetan​, thank you so much for betaing this and hyping it up, your comments made this fic a hundred times better! As I mentioned on the teaser, this fic took a lot out of me, but I thoroughly enjoyed writing the angst and will write more whenever the story aligns! I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing, and I hope this lovable Jin reaches your heart! (ngl, in usual fashion, I will come back and edit it again, so if you see a spelling mistake, your eyes are lying to you) Do let me know what you think, your asks and comments make my day!

This is the second part of my Dress Down series, find more at it’s masterlist!

ɴᴀᴠɪɢᴀᴛɪᴏɴ | ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ

Sweltering heat. Blaring traffic. Little to no sleep. Through all things wrong, one man’s thoughts wrapped around you like a cooling breeze, a shield to protect you from the vicissitudes of reality, to draw you back into all of him. Unfortunately, your reality may never see that day come to light.

Kim Seokjin.

Kim Seokjin, the man who cooked you up a greasy break-up meal at three in the morning with not a sight of discomfort, putting your needs above all.

Kim Seokjin, whose puns make you roll your eyes heavenward, half awed at how he manages to pull one out of his collection at a moment's notice, and half irked by the untimely laugh it brings out of you.

Kim Seokjin, the man who will never be yours, and you have no one to blame but yourself. 

One could argue that the miscommunication that had caused this present condition was two-way. If you had stopped him, corrected him, let him know the truth… you wouldn’t have to resort to the extreme measures you’re currently entangled in. One would also say, you are trying to redeem your mistake by trying too hard. Surely, everyone and their mothers could see through your ruse. 

This is the fourth time you’re visiting Jin for his BE shoot - a shoot taking place two hours away from the city, disguised under various layers of secrecy to prevent any leakage of the album concept, or Jin in general. Of course, you had been made privy to such exclusive information, because you and Jin were ‘best friends’. 

Best. Friends.

Nothing more, nothing less.

Best friends. The term you coined for (and forced upon) the bond you had. The bond that was too close to sprouting into something new, something fresh, something that was filled with glimmering allure and dragged you in like quicksand. But also, it reeked of commitment, of shadows, of newness that you hadn’t felt in the longest time, and fear of already being far too deep in without even taking the first step. 

The loud thrum of some internet kid’s new hit pulses through the air of the club as bundles of couples occupy the dance floor, laughing and gyrating to a song that, in your opinion, most definitely does not suit gyrating. But with enough of the weekend happy hours intake combined with hormone-riddled minds, one could very well throw it back to a church choir. 

You weave through the drunken bodies, trying not to spill the precariously held three drinks in your hands, making your way to your inner circle, the only people to blame for dragging you to this slosh-fest.

“Y/N!” 

Somehow Hoseok’s voice can echo across the club, but you didn’t even need his addressal because Jin’s laughter is loud enough to navigate anyone to your table. Seeing you struggle with the glasses (and mostly the crowd, with some of them living their exhibitionist dreams), Hoseok gets up to assist you.

“I swear, if I see one more couple pretending to be dancing as they rub one off of each other’s thighs, the black market will have my eyes.”

“Oh yeah?” Jin’s breathy voice interjects your black-market dreams, still bursting in short laughs from whatever sent him rolling before your arrival. “Why don’t you go join them?”

“And whose thigh is she taking, yours?” Yeji snorts out, one hand holding her nebula blue drink, the other wrapped around Hoseok, urging him to come closer. Jin’s features scrunch into a cringe, and you’re thankful for the dim lighting because the disappointment in your features does not reach them.

“The only action these leather pants are getting is in the damned laundromat,” he points to his shiny trousers, “some jerk dropped his drink on it.”

“You could be the first person to give some chick an orgasm and a yeast infection.” Hoseok giddily adds, his fifth shot clearly making a mess of his brain cells. 

Jin claps and gets up to move away from the group. “Better than a pregnancy!” he yells, before zigzagging through the crowd, possibly to the restroom. He is on his third cocktail, and you’d think cocktails are lighter drinks. But in this bar, their taps just seem to flow with tequila, and it is very evident in the way Jin is currently walking.

His absence hits you harder than you think, but it might be the alcohol talking. Jin has always been the mood-maker of the group, the one who brings everyone together. Of late though, his magnetic persona has been an irritant in your life. Any outing you two take, any chance you have to come clean about the burgeoning crush you have on him, is effectively disrupted by one of his posse. And today, Hoseok and Yeji took that trophy. 

“Earth to Y/N. Has the cocktail finally broken you?”

You flutter your eyes in a manic fashion, to disperse the daydream you were indulging yourself in, and bring your attention back to the couple calling for you. Surprisingly, they have stood up, Yeji emptying the last of her neon drink. 

“What happened?”

“We are going to the club nearby, they have better stuff. And that’s code for ‘they actually add water to the drink and the surround sound doesn’t shatter your ear drum’.’” 

She isn’t wrong. The cocktails and music here are a 19-year-old frat party dream, not something the working class can digest. But you’re tired at this point, and don’t want to be smothered by someone else’s love life when your own is down the dumps.

“You guys carry on! I’ll tell Jin where you are and he’ll meet you there!”

You watch as Hoseok and Yeji lead each other to the exit, hands circling their partner’s waist. They giggle on and on, about nothing and everything, and it only hardens the emptiness you feel inside you. 

Why can’t you gather the balls to spit your feelings out? What could possibly go wrong? Yes, you may lose one of your closest friends, but is this friendship really worth the agony? The bitterness you feel when you see any couple enjoying themselves? The anger you harbor whenever Jin tells you about his dates? The heartache, when he hugs you and tells you that you’re the best thing that’s happened to him… as a friend? Is it? Your plastered brain tells you to not make any rash decisions, so you don’t, instead choosing to get up and search for your best friend. 

The corridor leading to the washrooms is dimly lit, throwing a merlot filter over your eyesight, making you squint in search of your friend. You being shitfaced does not help, and while relishing in your floating wooziness, you see Jin come out, and feelings you’ve held at bay for so long slither through your currently porous defenses. 

He has always been good-looking. He himself has said so a dozen times.

But wow.

His hair lays messily atop his beautiful face, unkempt, like a breeze of beauty swept across his mighty looks and displaced every strand, causing disarray, but even the disarray only frames his superior looks and adds to its potent charm. The black, patchy sweater hanging loose off his broad shoulders makes you feel things you shouldn’t feel as a friend. That stupid gut of yours is currently screaming, yelling for all hands on deck, trying to block all the feelings from gushing in and sending you into overdrive.

By the time you can gather yourself to stop from giving in to those dangerous thoughts, Jin has crossed the distance between you, coming close, too close. Chocolate-brown eyes peer into your soul, searching for whichever fantasy you chose to lose yourself in. His eyes flit down to notice your rumpled dress that has found its way a couple of inches above its designated spot. His gaze returns to yours, but not without a newfound hardness, an almost steely glaze over the kindness that you usually find in the chocolate pools, accentuated under the garnet lighting. 

“Hey, umm…” You beg for a reprieve, from your thoughts, from your filthy mind, from the way he is eyeing your cleavage, or just for the burning between your legs. You’re about to make some serious mistakes, you can feel it down to your bone.

You’re far too overdressed. 

You knew it when you were in the process of getting dressed, but right now, you feel it much more - you look like a shiny disco ball orbiting amidst the plethora of loose tees, leggings and flannels. Everything screams comfort, because the amount of work they’re putting into this begs for it. 

The strappy lace sundress you wear is extremely out of place, the halter-neck tie behind your neck fastened a little looser than necessary, giving your breasts the exposure they deserve, a nice valley view. Your dress skirt, adorned with pretty frills and dainty flowers, cut across your thigh to frame your petite hips. You are one floppy sun hat away from an extravagant Greek cruise - and in the moment you wish you had one to hide your face in shame. 

You’re just out here, trying to escape the zone. 

“Oh, would you look at the time, it’s tits out Tuesday already?”

Your eyes roll before Sanghoon even finishes his sentence, because you wouldn’t expect anything else from him. On the team of the set design, he is carrying a whole drapery worth of plush, mauve curtains, struggling with the slipping fabric. But apparently not struggling enough to stop him from getting his nose into your business, it seems.

“Literally not even a time you just mentioned. Can’t get one thing right.” You can’t stop yourself from stretching a hand out to feel the curtain fabric, the satiny sheets begging to be touched. Before you can though, Sanghoon moves away, not allowing you to shift the focus of the conversation.

“Don’t steer away from the facts. Your tits.”

“That’s the fact?”

“They’re out.” He bucks up, trying to point with the hand stuffed underneath all the cloth. “That’s the fact.”

“Ugh, can’t a girl dress up once in a while?” The pointed attention makes you uncomfortable, because everything he’s insinuating is true. With every passing staff member, you count a new shade of grey, interspersed with occasional blacks and greens, a stark contrast to your floral overtones. Amidst the thousand footsteps taken in your vicinity, only yours are pointed heels, echoing across the studio with every clack. But you’re a stubborn one, refusing to give in to his totally valid argument. “I just woke up early.”

“Girl.” Like light through frosted glass, he sees through your bullshit, but only partially. “You put an alarm to dress up? I have nightmares of the boss brandishing her whip and telling me to get into position, and even that doesn’t wake me up.” 

“Have you ever considered… not announcing your kinks to everyone and their sisters?”

“Ehh,” he simply shrugs, “nothing is new when you’ve serenaded your boss drunk in a karaoke bar and still managed to keep your job. Wait. Is that highlighter?”

“Stop staring into my tits!” You can’t believe you got caught, but also, who can you blame? After testing this outfit out from the crack of dawn, you decided your cleavage needed some extra help. Three YouTube tutorials and one TikTok lady - who make it look far easier than it is - down, the contouring brought out the swell of your breasts, and against the light fabric of your dress, it does look too good to be true.

Memories of that night in the bar come in billows and waves, of how enamored Jin was with the way your boobs looked at that time. Even under the dingy lighting, in the cramped space, under heavily inebriated scrutiny, you couldn’t miss the flicker of heat in his gaze every time it passed your chest. 

One thing led to another, and it was a cascade none of you could stop. The heat of attraction between you two does not help your wandering mind, and the fever drowns the knowledge that what you’re feeling is, beyond a shadow of a doubt, crossing some lines that can never be mended back again. With the proximity, his musky scent invades whatever defenses you were trying to patch, piercing through all your inhibitions and you pull him into you, claiming his lips to be yours. 

With his wobbly knees and your wobbly heels, you somehow find your way to the washroom - mostly he does, you give in halfway to wrap your legs around his lean waist, his sturdy legs balancing your weight on them as your back hits the wall, and his lips tear down your walls. 

“You look so fucking sexy today,” between bated breaths and indulgent sighs you confess, “just driving me nuts.” Letting your hands drag along his abdomen, feeling the ups and downs of his abs, you attempt to rid him of the sweater that’s been on your hit list all night. But to your dismay, your endeavor is blocked, when Jin gathers your wrists in his palm, turning you around to bend you over on the countertop, the smooth marble chill hitting your braless chest, perking your nipples under the cold. 

“And you?” Jin bends to give your earlobe a languid lick, progressing very slow, a complete contrast to the movement of his hips as he ruts against your ass, your already short dress bunching up with every move. “You think it’s smart to have your tits torment me like this?” Grabbing a handful from behind, he tests the weight of each fleshy mound, and by now you are certain your perked nubs can pierce his palm. 

His free hand, not yet torturing you, decides to get in on the action and disappears under the counter, swiftly crossing the bunched fabric of your dress, gaining easy access to your pussy. The cold touch of his pads sears against the heat of your core, finding your pleasure button and languidly fiddling with it, with no intention to cross you over the brink in sight. The only pleasure you can indulge in is the reflection of him abusing your nipples, pinching and tugging them down, whispering filthy words into your ear as he takes in your fucked out countenance. 

You feel lacking, weak hands balancing your dizzy self, finding purchase to keep you upright - but you’re both drunk on alcohol and hypnotized by his beauty to do much more than stare at his mirrored counterpart. “For fuck’s sake, kiss me.” 

How he understood your slurred words, you don’t know, but you are glad he did. In a moment you’ve been displaced, the hurried motion sending your neurons into a flurry. Once your back meets the hard marble, and your eyes have the privilege to see his, you pull him in closer, the force enough to hold you against the wall while your legs wrap around his lean waist. 

Originally not a fan of drunken misadventures, that side of yours is strangely mute to the going current onslaught. Well, you don’t have much breath left to say anything, because Jin is efficiently stealing it all, his teeth clashing with yours as you engage in the messiest kiss ever known to mankind (or at least, to you). He changes pace often, dragging his tongue leisurely against your lower lip, conveying tacit words, just to switch it up with a sharp bite and reel you in. 

One corner of your senses can feel his fingers messing around your cunt, and playing with the wetness your thong can barely contain. It makes you shudder, the damage that his fingers can cause solely circling around your hole. 

“Fuck me.” 

In your drunken stupor, you don’t know if the words leave you right, but you get confirmation when his long fingers finally penetrate your cunt, giving your walls something to clench on - although nothing could possibly compare to what you imagine you can get from his dick.

“God, you feel that grip,” he grunts, with two of his fingers in you, and Jin’s smile is the most sinister you’ve ever seen. “I think we should take this home,” is what his lips utter, but his fingers delve deeper, searching for the spot that crumbles you. The base of his palm grinds against your throbbing clit, and you are forced to bite down on this sweater, lest an embarrassingly loud moan escapes you and cues outsiders into your filthy doings. 

“Now,” you half-hiss, half-growl as you grab the cusp of his legs to feel his half-hard erection grow under the pressure of your hand. Your palm sliters up just to go down again, this time without the blockade of his pants, but you are stopped short of success when Jin’s fingers slip out of you to give you a sharp swat. 

“Stubborn, aren’t we? Can’t fucking wait,” he whispers into your ear, and as he envelops your lobe with his cushiony lips, he continues, “I don’t want to hurt you.”

No, no, no. 

Your brain rejects logic, chews and spits it out before any of the rationale seeps into you. You have wanted this for far too long. The need inside you for a meaningful relationship materializes in the form of recklessness, desperately looking for surface-level relief for the moment. A night of sewing sutures to your battle-worn heart, stitches that may come off at the slightest strain - but right now, that will do. 

“Please, Jin,” your tantalizing tone riles up his cock again, eagerly waiting for your next words, “can’t you feel me dripping? Come on, I can take you.”

“Fuck, hear that wetness.” He lets his palm slap against your sopping entrance, not stopping with one. With every slap, droplets of your arousal splash out, the insides of your thighs coated in the sticky sweetness, but your body is an endless reservoir producing plentiful more for Jin to play with. “Have you been sitting with this all this time?”

Two long fingers invade your channel again, leaving you with no response other than a gasp. They scissor incessantly, preparing you for what could be the railing of your lifetime. One curl inside and his fingertips hit the spot he was looking for, making you warp your body to take the pleasure coursing through your veins. His tongue seems to mimic the actions, looping around your earlobe as he sucks it inside, both ends of your body engulfed in all the attention he could provide. 

Your cunt is weeping against the assault of this man’s hands, tears of your cum flowing down your legs with every pump of his arm. You are getting there, the sweet swell of release inching closer and closer.

But something doesn’t feel right.

The tightness in your belly, that is to a point caused by Jin, is harboring other sensations that are not entirely pleasant. Maybe you’re anxious about the happenings. Maybe you haven’t had a good orgasm in a while and have just forgotten how this thing works.

Or maybe, the bar should have the water tap actually give out water.

Either your eyes close, or your brain does, but suddenly all you can see is darkness.

 Again, you are just trying to escape the zone.

“Step under those studio lights,” pointing at the too-bright stage lights being set up at the moment, Sanghoon continues, breaking your daydream, “I bet you could signal to aliens with the booby-reflection. Call them to Netflix and chill.”

“In about five seconds, my heel will be puncturing your eye. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!” 

Sanghoon’s drivel was cut short, and so were your murder plans, with his entry. “Oh look, he’s on set. Gotta go!” 

It’s like the lights, earlier threatening to burn away your skin, dim down in reverence of the glow of his face. The twinkle of his eyes when they meet yours. The shine of his smile when he throws you one. The vibrance of his tone when he calls out your name. Everything he does now threatens to burn you whole and it’s a wonder you’re not scalding, but the singe hurts you deep inside.

“Y/N! How do I look?” It’s a bathrobe. Like satin, or silk. Fucking hell, your brain could explode with the adjectives coming up, a whole chunk of them very much inappropriate to utter out in the current scene. Your arms want to rise, engulf him into you, and you have to physically halt the muscles from doing anything stupid. Brain, quick! Say something snarky and spicy, as best friends do!

“What’s the theme, unicorn puke?” The safest way to deflect is to attack. So you do just that. “You look like you dressed out of Hannah Montana’s closet. Which if it's true, I really need to see it. There’s a top that I’ve been eyeing for decades!”

“Don’t say decades.” Jin’s eyes crinkle in humor. “Makes me feel so old. Your dress is pretty cool too!” 

Cool.

You find out how difficult life can be when you count every single minute of yours. So far, you have counted 4,310 minutes. That is two days, twenty-three hours, and fifty minutes. Ten more minutes and it will be three whole days since you and Jin spoke. 

Yet again, you can’t blame him. When you came to the next day, you were in your bed, clad in the same shimmering silver bodycon that you had donned last night. The same one that had been privy to the colorful deeds you had committed in what was a dreary, colorless setting. 

One ibuProfen and ginger ale, downed with some severe recollections of the previous night, and you had been ready to throw it all up again. 

I don’t want to hurt you.

Words couldn’t describe what you were going through, and numbers weren’t invented to count the endless thoughts racing in your brain. You don’t know what is more upsetting. The fact that you actually had a chance to open your heart and you totally let your pussy think instead? Or that he was the one coherent enough to stop you from getting too far, and you let your desperation get the best of you? Everything about that night was wrong. And all the wrongs lie on your side. 

I don’t want to hurt you.

In the moment, it was physical, he had to have meant that. But there was a tremor in his voice, you can remember clear as day, a slightly shaken side of him had emerged through the intoxication, and the words he had breathed were not shallow. There was a gravity to them, that you’d stupidly ignored in the heat of the moment.

And now, here you are. Counting up till the last minute, after which you can effectively call the friendship ruined. Stirring your tea mindlessly, you try to focus on the show on TV, the variety show comedy not striking the usual funny bones that they could 4,311 minutes ago. 

The programmed ding of your phone bursts your thought bubble, a sound you have missed the past 72 hours. The ring you dedicated to Jin, that always had you running to receive because anything he sends brightens your day. But unlike those happier times, this ring has your gut fall into a pit of despair, struggling to choose between dispersing the suspense or remaining blissfully unaware of the damage you caused.

Jin: Free tmrw? We could grab coffee Jin: And talk

Talk. How? You barely remember what went down, save for fleeting moments that you recollected with great difficulty. Your fingers type back, trying to mimic the nonchalance in his text, that is very much absent in your actual demeanor.

Y/N: Sure. Paik’s at 1? Jin: Yup. See ya

Three texts, zero laughs. Of course, you’re not expecting him to land his jokes in this situation, even someone as talented as he can’t flip this tension. You’re just going to have to wait for tomorrow, when he decides whether you have a place in his life or not. 

The painstakingly worn outfit, accessorizing the whole look, the straps of your heels digging into your toes, the specks of makeup dust lying stale on your collar bones, the shine faints at that word. Cool. A perfectly normal phrase for a normal friendship. You are left maimed, while he absent-mindedly tends to the rope of his robe, blissfully unaware of the cyclonic emotions churning inside you. All you can possibly do is gulp it down. 

He runs his hands through his hair, beautiful locks coming out of place, and from one corner of the set, a groan of anguish emerges. 

“Oppa! Don’t play with your hair and face.” A masked lady runs forward waving combs that look like artillery, “We just got done setting it!”

Some finger guns, a happy apology, and some silly jokes later, all the stylists merrily round up to undo his doing, and Jin signals to you to catch up later. And as he walks away, the strings tugging at your heart reappear, as they do every time you come to meet him.

You have a masochistic streak in you, putting yourself through this every day, when he had made it clear, that you two never stood a chance. 

As if things aren’t already difficult, he looks like a dream. 

Soft, snowy skin gleaming like it has personal lighting wherever it goes, you get flashes of the rarely witnessed sweat on his skin, from the ferocity of last night. He’s blowing away the foam of his cappuccino, and tiny bubbles float into the air before falling flat on the table, like an animated shine that follows him along. God has His favorites, and God makes sure all the lighting in the world is perfect for these favorites. 

In no hurry, you wait at the counter to get your latte. After receiving it though, you can’t linger any longer and drag yourself to the table of doom.

“Hey.”

If the rasp in your voice is evident, he doesn’t show any recognition on his face. But you’ve learned to never trust an acting major. 

“Hi. How are you doing?”

Inadvertently, a snicker escapes your lips. “Are you interviewing me for a job?” you joke, trying to disperse the heavy air, filled with unspoken words. “If so, at least know that I’m very expensive.”

The familiar windshield wiper laugh does not greet you. Dead silence does. The half-smirk he painfully gives you is heavy, and the furrowed brows haven’t an inkling of joy. It shoots daggers in your heart, to know that you are the reason for this jolly man’s despondency. 

“Listen, I don’t think we should skirt around the issue too much. It happened, these things happen. You think Hoseok and Yeji didn’t have sex before making it official?”

His matter-of-fact nature isn’t new to you. Jin has always been a very practical man. Regardless of his inane sense of humor, his logical point of view has always been flawless. 

But right now, at this very moment, logic isn’t what you are looking for. You are looking for answers, but as far withdrawn from logic as possible, to take the edge off of the tension-laden air that surrounds your table.

“Yeah, but even… unofficially… we aren’t a thing, right?” 

Your abrupt question takes Jin unaware, almond eyes widening, like a toddler caught in an act. 

“No, no! Of course not! I would never!” 

His confession slips out with an ease that hurts you, digs deep to carve out the part of you that dreamt of anything more. Your eyes fall to your knees to avoid his perceptive gaze, the sting clear as the sky on a summer day. 

You force a smile and continue. “Then there’s no issue. Anyway,” you gulp your coffee down, burning your throat, but it's a distraction from the burning inside, “I need to get to work. Anything else?”

He’s still searching you, for what, you can’t possibly fathom. From the looks of it, he should be happy with this homeostasis; he doesn’t even know what this means for you. To still stay suspended in limbo, not being able to move up or down, to continue having thorns digging into your beating soul as you watch him like nothing bothers your already frail feelings. Scene by scene, you can visualize the future, him distancing himself from you as he finds the one he calls his, with you left in the shadows. Your knees tremble in fear of the impending future.

Seeing you in a tizzy, he calls out, the voice too loud for the cafe and your mind’s prison cage. 

“We’re still best friends, right?” If you knew better, you’d say his expression is that of sadness, of regret. But your judgment is clouded with your own bothers, and you interpret it as a look of pity. Like a lovesick puppy, kicked to the streets, with nowhere to call home. 

“Yeah! Always.” You give it as much enthusiasm as you can muster. 

Best friends.

Ropes wind around your heart, tugging and causing the deep ache that sets in as you walk back into your dreary building. Each string pulls you into a different dimension where you could move on, where you could be okay with the setting you had just agreed to. Where you would keep up your end of the promise and truly remain friends with him.

But no matter how strong the tug, your heart never yields, never lets go of the castle of dreams you built, staying steadfast in its own misery, choosing to hope, choosing to live the life of unrequited love.

“And that’s a wrap! Good job everyone!”

Applause and hurrays echo across the set to bring you back to the present. The shoot has officially concluded, which means it's time for your most favorite and least favorite part of the day - Jin and you doing best friend things, like grabbing lunch, gossiping about obnoxious coworkers, threatening to disembowel each other (in Mortal Kombat, of course) and other friendly activities. 

Ever so respectful, Jin takes his time thanking every member of the set, regardless of whether they moved a cushion or held the reflector screen for hours. All the women gush over his beauty, reminding him of how, even amidst the glowing ornaments, his face was the brightest. His responses vary, from quiet little giggles, to complimenting the crew for making it happen, to straight up owning his charisma like a boss. That’s your man. 

Well, not quite. Not one bit.

After exhausting the handshakes and hugs to be received, Jin walks to you, hands pushing his robe back to give it a cape like effect. You’re just glad that the man’s child persona still stays with him, no matter the situation.  He guides you to his green room, cracking his bones on the way, (very sexily, might you add).

“Holding a pose for that long gives me cramps! You’d think dancing breaks my back, and you’d be wrong.”

You’re desperately avoiding looking at his fingers, and keep your eyes below them - shoot! His ceaseless stretching gives you a glimpse under his shirt - it is dragging your memories back to the last time you saw them, and you’d rather not. It is hurting you in more ways than one. 

Eye contact is your safest bet. Looking up, you give him a lopsided grin. “Your grandfatherly days are approaching, Jinnie.” 

“Hey!” 

The rest of the conversation was less speaking, more yelling and chasing after each other to the green room, Jin taking mock-offence at your jab at his age, and his fingers reaching out to flick your forehead in retort. In your noisy, messy fashion, you both finally enter the room, dim gold light bulbs and shiny mirrors meeting your huffing self. 

One hand on your knee, you hold on to Jin’s arm with your other, gasping for breath. 

“Your grandmotherly days are already here, Y/N,” he snorts, and earns a kick on the shin, but that doesn’t stop him from bursting into snickers.

“Wow, why does one man need 4 mirrors?” You gape at his current green room, mouth wide open. It looks better than your entire apartment, with the counter carrying top-of-the-line makeup products. Only the best for this man. “So you can admire yourself from 4 different angles?”

Jin has disappeared into one of the inner rooms, but you can hear him snort at your comment. “Come on, I’m not that conceited. When the whole crew shoots together, the extra mirrors help.” The last part of that sentence is muffled, and that cues you into an important fact. 

Jin is currently changing into something more comfortable.

A process that includes him getting naked.

Well maybe he doesn’t get fully naked, top on, top off, bottom on, bottom of-

Still. You’re sweating like a whore in church. 

And things only get tougher when he finally comes out. 

The ocean blue sweater he dons is tucked in. Who tucks in sweaters? Kim Seokjin. Why does he tuck sweaters? Oh, because he’s got an amazing waistline that he should most definitely show off, and the heat between your thighs becoming increasingly potent is a testament to that. You pretend to adjust your heels, giving the right expressions to show you’re in pain, but in actuality you are bringing your legs closer to get you some relief, just any relief. 

Ripped jeans too. You get a peek of the thighs you were denied access to the night of the fuckening. Ridged and beautiful, not a speck in sight to mar his perfection. You are glad the facial expressions for pain and pleasure are not far apart, because your thighs, albeit very lacking, are helping the imagery in your head. Just Jin, seated on one of these leather chairs, and you straddling his thigh, clit aching against the strands of the rips in his denim, the fabric soaking up the wetness, with every push forwa-

“Now that you mention it, I do look dashing.”

And there goes that dream. 

You pinch his cheeks in adoration, the vulgarity of your thoughts getting whitewashed by his silliness and blooming heart-shaped flowers in their stance. You feel your own pinch in you, wondering if this scene would be the same had you blurted your feelings out that day at the cafe.

It's times like these when you remind yourself why you choose to quieten that side. This dynamic cannot reincarnate in any other form. Any imbalance to this equilibrium could cause a serious case of best-friends-turn-awkward-acquaintances, and you don’t know if that’ll hurt you more than you currently do. You don’t plan on finding out.

But on God, he tests that resolution every single day.

Jin doesn’t even hint that he knows of the turmoil blasting behind your eyes. He nonchalantly fixes his hair, gives you a one-over as you are mentally undressing him, nonchalantly as well. Then he moves to grab his cologne, and two spurts disintegrates all the whitewashing and takes you back into the obscenities you were unfolding. 

“So I’ll just go over the shoot photos, and then we can leave! You’re cool waiting here?”

“Hmmn, yeah!” You don’t let your mouth run any longer, fearing what might slip out. 

He gives you a wide, innocent smile. “Great! See you in a bit.” Poor guy. If only he knew how debase plans you were conjuring just from the aroma of his cologne. 

It is musky, like cedar or pine, perfectly suiting him. It is the same scent you remember inhaling, face stuffed in his sweater when he was fingering you to the tenth circle of hell. As he walks away, the fragrance diminishes, save for the slightest hint of lingering. You search for the source, and find the culprit strewn across the sofa.

The outfit Jin wore for the shoot held remnants of the perfume, and when you bring the shirt close and take a long, deep whiff, you transport yourself to the land of your dreams. You relish the fever smell of his cologne, mixed with his own natural scent, deciding that this is what you wish to smell like every waking morning.

Your longing for him has crossed way beyond physical boundaries. You longed for his love, longed for his attention. Longed to be the one that brings the light to his face. From morning rays to the darkness of the night, you wanted to experience it all by his side. To be his lone star, shining bright beside the moon. 

Your hands are moving without your control, disrobing you of your thirst trap of a dress and putting on Jin’s shirt instead. One look at the mirror and you let out a silent groan - it fits you just right. Just enough to cover your ass cheeks, loose enough to let the air conditioning hit your heated pussy. While well-fitting shirts have never been the cornerstone of a successful relationship, your delusional mind takes whatever wins it gets.

Adding layers to your pipe dream, you don the robe that gave you a tough time throughout the shoot. When you press the tails of the robe to your cheek, the softness of the material is soothing. Soft, like Jin’s eyes, like his hugs, like his smile. Like him.

Leaning against the counter, you steady yourself, mind split in titillation. Your fingers find their own path, drawing circles on your breasts over his shirt, imagining Jin’s long fingers in place. While teasing your nipple to pointed peaks, you slip your other hand under your panties, trying very hard to mimic his digits, twiddling your clit between your fingers. Alas, the effect isn’t achievable, because Jin seems to know how to play you better than yourself. 

The scent is getting stronger, without any provoking, and it is doing wonders for your immersion. You let out a loud moan when your fingers press inside, and you’re just glad no one can witness this.

“Y-Y/N?”

Fuck.

You are pulled away from your dreamland that was so impenetrable that you didn’t hear Jin step into the room. All the blood gushing to your nether regions has made a U-turn to flood your brain to think of a plausible explanation for this position. Instead it makes you giddy, and when you try to stand you wobble in your heels, to be rescued by what you think is a very scandalized Jin. 

Time stands still when your eyes meet, and what you see are blown out pupils trembling, many questions fluttering between you two. Jin crosses a tenth of the distance between you, lips flutter as they try to make a decision - do they want to part and give way to the voice of question? The voice of reason? The voice that will break this hush, burst this bubble where he has the one chance to give in to his longing?

You bring your lips closer, and cause immense disquiet in his dome, the way of his heart gathering speed against rationale. Your eyes dance between matching his gaze and finding his lips, every fraction of an inch you cross sending tremors through you. You can feel the shockwaves traverse through your body, making a pitstop at your lips, tingling them awake. They move downwards, passing your heart, beating it wildly against its cage, and then to the pit of your stomach to tighten in anticipation; finally reaching the tip of your toes, where you stand right now, a nanoscopic distance between you. Each one of you is afraid to cross the bridge, unaware of the other’s desires. 

Finally, Jin acqueises and meets you on your side. 

Atomic explosions ring through your head, clearing out every single thought that is not about Jin’s lips on yours. The ropes that held your heart from beating to the tune of your want, they’ve loosened their knots to give you the leeway to love freely. As your lips exchange positions, his teeth lightly drag across your plush petal, and it brings back the most important part of that night that you couldn’t recollect - the one where his lips sang wordless songs of adoration against yours. Blind as a bat, you were.

You dig your fingers into his hair, not minding your residual arousal coating his locks, and you feel his hands doing the same to you. With your eyes closed, you feel a rough edge to his cushiony soft lips, but Jin fixes that mistake - one stray strand of hair trapped in the middle of your indulgence - he pulls it away to give you all of the kiss. The hand tucked in your tresses pushes in, silently demanding more access, and you’re nothing but ready to give it.  

His tongue sneaks in to play a game with yours - when you seek it, it goes into hiding, finding perfect pleasure in soft, sweet kisses, but when you stay, it comes back in, awakening your tongue to deepen again. Everything he is doing is too much and not enough in one go, and you whine into his mouth in desperation, seeking some well-earned relief after months of holding back.

Amidst the flurry of your lips, your back hits the vanity countertop, and Jin pushes away everything on top to make space for you, not caring what expensive item flies down the counter to accommodate your ass.

As if you’ve made up for the months of holding back, the softness of the kisses erodes, teeth coming into play more and more, reminiscent of the night that went by in a blur. He swallows every mewl you give in return, blissed out beyond repair, your neediness making his cock strain against the denim. 

His hand snakes down, spreading his fingers to get a hold of your back to push you towards him, covering any gap that dared to intervene. Now unworried about the shoot, your hands have effectively ruined his perfectly placed locks and messed them up to resemble the craze he let you spin in.

Before he can glide his tongue back in, you break the kiss, lest you lose yourself in it to the point where you forget to breathe. With attached foreheads, you take deep drags of air, letting the oxygen flow to your brain before you make some ill-advised, unclarified decisions.

“I- I was jus-”

“Shhh. Wait,” he breathes out, wanting to take a second and fully savor the moment. You nod in return, making his head move along with yours.

After sufficient air fills his lungs, Jin starts. “Y/N, we should stop.”

Last time this had happened, you had tried to force your way through his barrier, without giving his feelings a second of consideration. So this time, you don’t repeat your mistakes. “Tell me why.”

“Because, I don’t know what you’re looking for, but I’m way deeper in this than you think.”

“Jin, I-”

“Let me finish.” He stops you before you can explain how much you reflect his emotions, possibly more. He doesn’t seem to want to listen now. “Let me finish, or else I’ll chicken out, for the millionth time.”

You’re dumbfounded. Millionth time? When was the first? Acting majors, by God. 

“I love you, Y/N.”

No, now you are dumbfounded. Your hands, holding his precious locks, drop down in shock, at sheer disbelief that all this time, he has been ready and waiting to return you the favor. Jin though, misinterprets it as a look of disdain. 

“I-I know I do, and I’m sorry that I do. I know you don’t feel the same way. You can hate me all you want, but this is the truth.”

“And yes,” he continues, refusing to halt for even half a second, afraid that the courage he mustered to confess would dissipate the moment he does, “I’m attracted to you, and I don’t know what went down here --” flicking his wrist to mention your (his) outfit, “--but I’m looking, okay? And I’m hard as fuck. But that’s not all there is to it.”

“I need all of you.” He takes an audible gulp, trying to stymy his emotions from overpowering him. “I want to take you out, I want to hold you hand, I want to bring you to all the places I love. I want to introduce you to people, not as my best friend, but so much more than that. It hurts me,” bringing his hand to his chest, he emphasizes the point of pain by clutching over his heart, “hurts to call you that because I’m lying through my fucking teeth.”

You break eye contact, because there are tears smarting your eyes at his heartfelt revelation. You can’t believe the idiot that you have been all this while. The man of your dreams stands in front of you, baring his soul, and you can’t even do him the decency of telling him what you felt yourself before jumping his bones.

And you love him, too. Maybe you haven’t said so, even to yourself, but you’ve known all this while.

You love him.

“If you are just looking for a fuck, or want any sort of a ‘benefits’ situation, we should stop. I can’t lie to myself anymore.”

“Jin, my God,” you half-sigh, half-laugh, feeling a burden lift off of you after months of pining.

“You don’t have to pacify me, it’s okay, I’ll be fine.” Even in this moment, he is looking out for you. His lips are curved upward to show you that he’s okay, but his pupils are shaky and restless, not in sync with his smile. You hope your next words can fix that for him.

“Pacify you? Hate you?” You shoot him an incredulous look, one you will explain to him very soon. “You are a much better person than I am, Jinnie. For months now, I’ve loved you, but even at this point, I didn’t stop to tell you.” The guilt of letting your hormones cloud your judgement for the second time lays heavily on your conscience. “I’m sorry for not making this clear earlier, but let me now. I love you, Kim Seokjin. I have for way too long. I want you, I need you. You have me, in every possible way.”

It feels unparalleled to get that off your chest. The leaden weight of your emotions immediately disappears - or the fact that it's shared, makes it much, much lighter. But then you look at Jin, and he still seems to have not put two and two together. You patiently wait for him to process all the information. 

When he finally recoups, he yells, “What?!”

You let out a loud guffaw, the first one with no inhibitions in the longest time. “What?”

“Why didn’t you say anything that day at the cafe?!” 

“You said you’d never date me, asshole!” You punch his chest softly, before slipping your hands behind him and pulling him closer. “I might not look like it, but I have some dignity.”

“I said that?” Jin brings one hand to pinch his nose in annoyance. “What an idiot. I think I was just inverting everything to make sure I don’t accidentally slip up.”

You lift your head to meet his eyes again, letting him see the tears you were hiding. You find a couple in his eyes, too. But the smile on your face is genuine, and that is all that matters. “I was blind too, so don’t beat yourself up about it.” 

Flitting your eyes down to find the contour of his cock against his jeans, you ask him innocently, “How about we make up for lost time?”

“Fuck, yes, please.” And with that, your lips are engulfed again.

When you have all your guards down, the kiss tastes sweeter than before. Mere moments ago, while thoroughly enjoying the kiss, a sense of reticence had clouded your pleasure, holding you back from luxuriating in the headiness. A series of what-ifs had plagued your subconscious without your realization, but with all that cleared, you wholly submit to the kiss, emptying your mind until nothing but his name remains.

“Fuck, Y/N,” Jin gasps out, when you bite into his pillowy lower lip, “I thought you looked the prettiest in the dress earlier but,” after pulling away, he drinks your current attire in, “you look the most beautiful in this.”

You snicker. “Even more than World Wide Handsome?”

His eyes bore into yours, no hint of the joking lilt he always carries in them. 

“So much more.”

Your hands find their place amidst his shaggy hair again, and you lodge his face into your neck - a command Jin acquiesces to with great pleasure. After a long, wet lick to your collarbone, he lays feather-soft kisses on the trail he left, starting from your shoulder and working inward, until he brushes against the back of your ear. You grasp at his sweater, because his lips feel so good. Your breaths are short, sucking in every time he allows your skin the luxury of a soft peck.  Once he lays a kiss on your forehead, he brings his gaze down to one of the main reasons that causes his cock to stir.

“Fuck, look at your nipples under my shirt.”

Gazing down, you can see the two pointed peaks that caught Jin’s eyes. 

“That tends to happen when I’m thinking of you.” 

He twists a nipple over the shirt, hardening it further, and you throw your head back in the satisfying pain. “Yeah, I remember.”

You are unraveling every second, the ache swishing amongst the bliss his fingers are bringing in you. He’s switched over to drawing circles around your nipple, until he snaps and tugs your shirt up, finally revealing the palmfulls of flesh awaiting his hands. 

“Ah that night, I didn’t get to do this. Take this off.” But then, he makes you put on his robe again. You throw him a questioning look, to which he responds with a sheepish smile, “Just so, you know… you don’t feel cold… or something.”

“Just say you like me in your clothes and move on.”

“I love you in my clothes,” he admits in a heartbeat, his expression that of anguish, “can we move on?”

“God, gladly.”

Unexpectedly, he bites the side of your boob - not hard at all, but feeling his teeth against your skin sends your head reeling backward. Your involuntary response is to wrap your legs around his waist, grinding your core against him. His teeth continue to nip you lightly across the expanse of your breasts, the trail of saliva he leaves cooling parts of your flushed body. Finally, finally, he latches onto your left nipple and gives it a long, pleasurable suck.

“Ahh, Jin - you’re too - God damn it - you’re too good at this.” 

Without stopping the onslaught he is unleashing on your breasts, his fingers begin to move - but soon, they stop, hesitation rippling off of their tips. His pace falters, and his mind is fighting on the next course of action.

“Can I-”

“Finish what you started that night?” you complete for him, already prepared with your answer. “Yes, please.”

All forms of uncertainty shoot out of his touch, and he confidently trudges forward. Playing with the band of your panties, he gives you a well-intended chuckle, murmuring, “As far as I remember, I was so good you passed out.”

“Boy,” You groan, intended in jest, but his teeth slide against your jaw and it mostly comes out more wanton than jovial, “let me see you have tequila for dinner and remember much the next day.”

“Fair fair,” he gives in, shifting to buss the valley of your cleavage, feeling your heart thud against your ribs holding it in place. “Well today,” he starts without moving his face, his nimble fingers moving past the barrier of your underwear, pressing two fingertips directly on your clit, and hissing like it's him at the receiving end, “I’ll give you enough to remember.”

You pull his sweater off and chuck it away, not wanting to be reminded of any blockades that kept you apart, and your hands roam the expanse of his back remembering the touch of his skin from the night at the bar. His body isn’t new to you, but the circumstances make it feel different. 

Finally, his fingers find their way inside you. 

Yes, this. This was what was missing from your drunken tryst. With your heads in place, your ardor intensifies, and you move his lips back to yours needing to release your animalistic desire into his mouth. Pleasure surges through both of you as you threaten to swallow him whole.

You can feel him being more present, and considering the merciless finger-fucking you had earned that night, this is taking it to a whole other degree. 

The night at the bar, his fingers did their best to ravish you, but now, Jin is paying attention, close attention to the way you respond. Every muscle movement is recorded in him as you struggle to accommodate three of his lengthy digits. Leaning close, he gives your peaked nipple the lightest feather lick - the suddenness sends shockwaves through you as he continues to tweeze the other, talented pianist hands performing his musical piece on both ends of you.

His fingers pump into you with determination, finding new depths to explore that he missed out on, and with a curl of his pointer, you blank out, screaming in the orgasm that is washing over you. Every skincell of your body feels the quiver of lust spreading, your cunt squeezing for an eternity, milking the orgasm out to the extent that you can. 

When you look down, your metaphorical orgasmic flood manifestes as a deluge of your arousal leaking on the table. And when you look back up, you can see the salacious ideas making their rounds in Jin’s head as he looks at the inundation you released. 

Hurried hands still convulsing from the intensity of your orgasm, you undo his belt, followed by his jeans and finally - getting the pleasure you were heartlessly denied of - his cock is out, in all its glory, twitching as the cool air hits its naked skin. Jin’s plans don’t go hand in hand with yours though.

“Are we just - holy fucking shit - just, umm, leave that to waste?” he lustfully looks down to your leaking core, and someway, through your hold on his dick, he tries to steer you into his plans.

“I don’t know about that,” you cheekily reply. You have the right idea to satisfy both of you, and get down to the task.

With the flat of your palm, you swipe across the droplets of cum you released, gathering them to transfer them onto his thick length. Jin thrusts into your hand, the wetness jolting him into attention, and he places an arm on your shoulder to steady himself. 

“You’re going to taste yourself?” he asks as you continue your vacillating motion, twisting at the base of his head with the wetness you graciously provided yourself. You give him a nonchalant look, something he is trying to do to you as well. 

“Who said I’m gonna suck you off?”

His look changes, and the one you get in return is cocky, arrogant, downright rude if you were honest. You expected him to play on with your banter, but one raised eyebrow and the lazy smirk he gives, to what he probably thinks is a joke - Zeus could land on earth and not be able to stop you from gobbling his meat. 

Your mouth is filled with his dick even before your knees hit the ground. Jin staggers back, but your suction on his dick is funnily strong enough to pull him back before falling.  You switch positions, having him balance himself against the counter, all while you refuse to leave his cock out. His giggle of endearment has you pouting, but it swells your heart and makes you want to give more, more of anything and everything. With your renewed vigor, you push yourself in until his pubes tickle your nose, and his tip tickles your throat. 

“Your-”, “I-”, “uhh-” 

Every new sentence Jin starts crumbles to your actions. You furrow your brows both in concentration on your blowing skills and trying to decode what he is trying to say. 

Jin takes a large gulp, adamant on making this one a coherent sentence. “You know, I used to imagine this, and in my dreams I used to be very sexy and suave, talking my way throug-oof-” You run your tongue over the tip of his leaking dick, emphasizing the point he is coming to, “Now I can’t even complete sentences here.”

“You being you is super sexy in itself.” And you curve your tongue to match the arch of his cock, letting the incoming saliva pool on it before letting it run down his shaft, dripping down from his balls. Strings of his precum connect to your lips, and you swipe your tongue through them, relishing the salty goodness before going back in for more. 

“Y/N, shit, did you just moan?”

How couldn’t you? The fact that he is horny for you, so much so that rivulets of precum don’t stop drizzling down your throat, has you preening. You hum your assent in response, not willing to let go even for a moment, but Jin pulls you off before you can get a chokehold on the base of his cock again. 

“Never had a woman moan while sucking me off. It’s sexy as fuck,” Jin breathes into your lips as he dives in for a kiss.

Your chest is heaving, catching the breaths you lost when you were down. “Then why’d you stop me?”

“Are you kidding me? I was about to lose it right there.”

“Jinnie, come on,” you break the fragmentary kiss you were sharing, looking into his glassy eyes, “let me feel you come on my tongue.” To emphasize your conviction, you lick his lips, persuading him of the sinful deeds your tongue is capable of doing if he’d just let you.

“Oh man, stop. What’s worse than busting a nut in your mouth? Busting it while you’re kissing me. Making me feel like a teenager.” You erupt into a loud laugh, soon followed by Jin as well. It is so him to joke about this. 

“And babe,” all hints of embarrassment vanishing from his tone, “I’m only going to come inside you.”

“Fuck, fuck, yes. You got a condom on you?”

“Yeah, let me grab my wallet.” The instant he moves away, you feel naked, shivering from the comfort stolen away from you. But then you hear Jin grumble, “I hope I don’t have the bacon-flavored one.” And the absurdity of it all puts you at ease again.

“Ew, stop, even you can’t make that sexy. My lady boner is dying.”

He envelops you again, and you can feel the laughter echoing in his lungs before making it out to your ears. He brings your attention to the familiar rustle of foil wrapper. “Thankfully, we got chocolate.”

“Mmmh, gotta love chocolate.”

You take the condom out of his hands, and roll it onto his stiff length, flattered that he’s holding his erection for so long. 

“Okay, stick it in me!” And you smack your ass in readiness, and a very flabbergasted Jin breaks out chortling.

“Y/N, stop being my best friend for like, five minutes!” His brows are furrowed in pretense exasperation, but you can see his lips holding back a genuine smile through the grimace, just happy that your dynamics haven’t changed the slightest, even though everything else has shifted.

“Okay okay,” you try and suppress your own laughter, before continuing, “how do you want me, baby?”

“Bend over on the vanity. And keep your eyes on the mirror.” And as you move into position, his palms grab your ass and squeeze it hard, feeling your glutes push back against his grip, and he pushes you forward till you're on the tips of your toes. You watch him through the mirror, watch him admire the way your ass curves over the table edge, how your toes struggle to keep you up, and how the dimples of your back are deepened by the arch, peeking under the bunched up robe tails, just waiting for him.

“Jin.” Your hushed whisper puts him in action.

Pushing the head in is anguish and relief at the same time. His bulbous head stretches your entrance; even with your preparation, you feel it sting. The searing gets better and better with every inch slipping in, and when he finally lodges inside, you let out a heavy breath, still panting and keeping yourself from screaming bloody murder in pleasure. Jin bends forward to paint the back of your neck, sucking the flesh till the circular bruise comes to surface. 

“Can you- can you-fuck, no, wait-” Your brain is at war with itself, battling between adjusting to his girth and having him pump you into adjustment. 

You can feel Jin’s snicker from behind you, and he finally makes the decision for you. “I’ll wait, I have things to do here,” he says before playing around the patch of skin, spreading from the base of your hair to the expanse of your back, his teasing licks relaxing your walls and accommodating his girth. The pain is almost gone, expect for the lingering ache that only helps you.

“You can move now, babe.”

“Okay, okay.” Your words snap him out of the painter’s dream he was in, and he twitches inside you. Something about the ease at which you both have adopted nicknames for each other softens his heart and hardens his cock. 

Pulling out till only the head rests inside, Jin himself struggles against the third degree grip your pussy has on him. As he is thrusting inside again, your walls tense up, making it harder and harder for him to hold back. 

“Y/N, sweetie, relax. I got you.”

“Jin, I’m-” You have tears running down your eyes, the pleasure and unsurmountable happiness rolling out in fat hot drops. “Fuck me harder. I won’t last.”

“Shit. Okay, hold on then.”

To what? Is what you’re going to ask before Jin unleashes his carnality onto you. Your breasts, dripping in sweat and saliva, are plastered to the countertop, which in itself is jiggling to the beat of Jin’s thrusts. His dick is curving inside to hit you repeatedly, and you have to gather the satin fabric to wipe your eyes to keep your gaze fixed on him. 

He looks majestic. Forehead embellished with beads of sweat, his hair coiffed up, lips sanguine red after your vicious kisses - you swipe your tongue along your own lips to find them battered in response. His honey chest is heaving with every push, and a particular one hits you just right. 

You let out a guttural groan, and Jin takes note of it immediately. 

“Up,” he commands, and loops an arm under your belly to you pull you up and closer and now every thrust hits deeper into that spot he has found in you, your back connected to his chest as the two of you move in tandem; this is the most together you’ve ever felt with anyone. This moment is to be etched in your memories forever.

You scream into your fist to muffle the sounds, the edge of the table digging into your hip bone as you feel yourself getting closer to the brink. One swipe to the clit is all you have left to bring you to your release. 

And from some telepathic force, or from the clutch your pussy has on him, Jin beats you to it. His fingers come down and carefully find your swollen nub, pinching it between his fingers. If he thought you’d shown him your hardest clench, he was wrong, because right now your dam has broken, and the iron-clad grip you give his cock sends him reeling, too.

You are gushing on his dick, the rubber dripping with your wetness. Jin too releases into the condom in stuttered gasps, his thrusts becoming shorter and shallower as he comes down from his high. 

Petal-like kisses fall on your back as the two of you regain your breaths. The mirror that served you two well is covered in a fog of hot breath and perspiration, blearing your vision of yourself, but somehow, it sparkles with Jin’s reflection. His nobility-esque visuals use the haze as a valance for his appearance, framing them to make him look like you’re among the clouds. And in some way, you actually are.

“Ah, let me go.” You jiggle your shoulders back to make the man above you move. “Fuck, can you check if my spine is in place? I think you dislodged it.”

“Shut up and come hug me, I’ll squeeze it back in place.”

Now this is something you could get used to.

As he ties and throws away the used condom, you flip over to face him and fall back into his embrace, broad shoulders promising to protect you, making you feel safe in his care. Jin on the other hand is simply ecstatic to feel you on him, feeling your thumping heart beat for him, after months of pining and pondering whether anything would become of the seed of your tumultuous friendship. Now, it has blossomed to a garden of prospect and promise, every petal of every flower here reading a new opportunity to tell you how much he adores you, cherishes you, treasures you. How much he loves you.  An opportunity he doesn’t wait to use. 

“I love you.”

The pink tinge of your cheeks either comes from the sex, or from his comment, but either way, he is glad its from him. 

“I love you too, Jin. So, so very much.”

If your heart could leap out of your chest, it would do so, to find its way to his and fuse into one. But for now, your entwined bodies give you all you want. 

You hear Jin stifle a laugh, and pull back in question. He points to something odd on the countertop.

“What is that?”

The cream white surface of the table, that was maligned by your ignoble deeds, now sports two glistening, wheatish semi circles that look very similar to the sizes of one person who was splayed on top of it just moments ago. 

“Is that…” Jin is trying to contort his lips and halt the looming snicker, and he brings his eyes down to your chest (trying not to get hard again), “Did you have makeup on your chest?”

“Shut up.” All you can do is fall closer into his arms, hopefully masking the tint of embarrassment highlighting the apples of your cheeks. “I wanted to make them look extra good for you.”

He’s given up on holding back, the full-bellied laugh that resonated from him echoing across the room. But it dwindles down fast, coming to small chuckles of tenderness, and he slips his digits beneath your chin to have you meet his gaze.

“They always look good,” he whispers, his admittance setting your chest aflame, “trust me, I’d know.”

Taglist 💛:  @little7bitchh​, @afangirllikeme-blog​, @h34rt1lly, @marpotterhead​

Thank you so much for making it to the end! I hope you enjoyed the fic, my ask box is always open for your lovely opinions. To read more of my work, find my main masterlist here. :)

[just-whatever-ig]

A comfortable Clone Commanders pile

Dedicated to: TyraCapulet

I was asked to write clone pile things. And I wrote this.

Rex knocked on the door of Fox's office. He had not been there often in his life, the dry and quiet hallways of the senate made him uneasy, his hands drawn to his hips like magnets.

There was laughter behind the door and a strained sound of someone before the door opened and he got greeted with Ponds’ gruff but giggly face. "Rexyyy", he grinned and slumped against the doorway, his breath carried the distinct smell of strong alcohol. "Are you guys getting dunked in there without me?", Rex raised an eyebrow and pushed past Ponds to find his brothers, Cody, Fox, Thorn and Colt - much to his surprise - huddled together on the floor. Most of them had already disposed of their upper armor.

"Reeeex", Fox called, almost throwing a small bottle at him that definitely contained said strong alcohol. Cody grinned, cheeks pink from drinking while Colt still seemed pretty cooled in his place behind Thorn's back. They all somehow already managed to lay on each other with nobody being the lowest. Impresive with only 4 people.

"Mind if I join?", Rex grinned happily as Ponds already helped him take off his armor. It would only get in the way uncomfortably. "Please", Thorn slurred and grabbed the bottle from Fox's hand to take a swig. He pulled a face and passed it on to Cody who screwed the lid back on. "What's the Rancor Commander doing here?", Rex pushed aside their legs to make space for himself and add himself into the pile.

"You know, vacation is a thing", Colt replied with a self-indulgent smirk. "You lucky fucker", Thorn commented with a snort. Rex snaked himself under Cody's legs with his head on Fox's soft belly - a clear sign for the lack of training his fellow brother got around here, forging the chancellor's signature instead of fighting. "Here, Rex'ika", Fox pushed the bottle into Rex's chest and he took his time to look at the tagless bottle. "What even is that?" - "Some super cheap backyard slobbery, it's awful", Ponds explained and pushed himself up to Cody's flank and probably back into his arms judging by the way Cody awaited him.

"Hey, Thorn", Fox uncoordinatedly slapped his brother in guards against the biceps, "When was this ambassador gathering again?" - "The one with La Pee Tou?" - "Yeah." - "Like... noon-ish?" - "Ah. Alright."

"Don't mind if I ask, who's La Pee Tou?", Rex questioned as he unscrewed the bottle and took a sup without even smelling, there was no use, his receptors had been burned to the ground by the last tear gas ambush on Polonio I. The liquor felt like he was swallowing down a rotgut made with gunship fuel. It burned his throat like fire and caused him to clear his throat a few times.

"Tou is an ambassador from the far outside worlds, even beyond the outer rim. They're interested in trading, or something", Fox explained and passed the bottle on to Colt who took a big swig before Ponds reached for it. "Fifth sector worlds? They do realize we're in war, right?", Cody snickered. "The shab do I know?", Fox threw up his hands and snatched the bottle from Ponds waiting hands to have another swig.

"Hehe", Thorn laughed lightly, "You won't believe what happened the other day." - "What?", Rex accepted the bottle once again. "This man, yeah, this man of a chancellor...", his voice was a mixture of exasperation and amusement. Fox burst out laughing. "Oh, riiight, I totally forgot 'bout that." - "Sometimes I think this man just wants to die. Like that one suicidal senator we had, you remember?" - "Lord Oberon?" - "Yeah. But like three times worse."

"Why? What did he do?", Cody chuckled. "You know, he's the chancellor, which means he gets a lot of death threats, most of them are just harmless little jabs but there was this one message that everyone of us said should be taken seriously because we don't want to take any chances. We tell him that, say that he should stay in his damn penthouse until we have clearance and all." Fox's laugh had almost become hysterical at that point, his stomach pushing up against Rex's head like a jackhammer. "What does this bloody idiot do - I'm still not over this stupidity", Thorn rubbed his face, "He legitimately dresses up as one of his body guards and sneaks out of the senate like a stupid little bitch." - "I love how he literally thought we wouldn't notice", Fox laughed, "Like, homie, what did you expect? Your bodyguards are like 5 miles taller than us. Don't you think we notice when they magically shrink?!"

"Did you call him out?", Colt asked. "Nah", Thorn snickered, "We want him to believe that we didn't notice." - "I want to know how often he's going to pull that off", Fox added, smirking into the neck of the bottle.

"Quick check-in, who's still bound to show up?" - "Nobody", Colt waved off, "You were the last." - "Oh yeah? Where's Wolffe and Bly? I mean, I know that Bacara's on Tamba IX." - "Bly is somewhere shagging his girlfriend." - "What?", Rex snorted, and made himself comfortable against the side of Fox's chest. "He'd protest loudly", Cody threw in, "But it's impossible there's not something between them. I mean, just look at her clothes." - "Yeah, she basically asks to be shagged, right?", Ponds added. "Are we speaking about General Secura?" - "Who else?", Cody grinned.

"Well, Commander Tano uses to wear rather.... liberal clothes as well, but we still get along on a very professional base", Rex argued. "Yeah, because she's like 3 standard years old", Ponds rolled his eyes. "She's actually older than us", Cody corrected neutrally. "What?!", was Fox's reply. "Yeah, but I'm still concerned for her most of the times. General Skywalker is so chaotic at times and she's such a teeny weeny little thing, I’m afraid she might get caught in the crossfire at some point", Rex sighed, "You know, she's my superior and older and everything but I just feel.... responsible."

"I totally get what you mean", Cody threw him a brotherly but slightly too strong punch, "Do you remember that few months when you still served under my command and Skywalker was still a commander himself?" Rex laughed. Yes. He did remember that time vividly with all it's craziness. "That must have been the worst time of your lives", Ponds commented. "You bet!", Rex spat out.

Thorn and Colt chuckled. "At least you work together with people who got a clue of what the shab is going on", now it was Colt's turn to throw up his hands in disbelief. "You won't believe what strange excuses some rookies come up with just to not be bound to do anything", he laughed lightly, "I once had a squad who all broke a bone on purpose to avoid being shipped out. You should have heard their stories, one of them said he fell from his cot. And another one 'slipped in the shower'." - "Oh, so they were lying?", Thorn asked. "Well.... one wasn't. One of them stumbled over some stairs and totally wrecked his kneecaps." That drew a round of laughter from the pile.

"Folks, guys, brothers, I have a good story as well", Cody flailed with his arm to get the next turn to speak. "Are you going to complain about General Kenobi again?", Rex predicted with an eyeroll. This was getting out of hand, Cody didn't even realize how lucky he was with the reserved and calm thinking Jedi Council member and not with an airhead called General Skywalker. "How do you even expect him to talk about anyone else?", Fox mumbled around the rim of the rotgut. "Force, you're so right. Cody, your Kenobi-stress-headaches have been replaced with an obsession. This is an unhealthy turn of events", Ponds teased, earning himself a slap against the chest.

"Alright", Colt rolled his eyes, "Tell us, then." Cody opened his mouth to speak but had to take his time to giggle first which immediately infected the whole group. Cody's laugh was rare. But ever the funniest, with a little snort in the beginning and the waving snickering in the end. "It was-", he had to pause again, "I'm wheezing, guys." - "Believe it or not, we noticed", Thorn commented dryly which set Fox off like a rocket for no reason whatsoever. "Impressive story, really", Colt took over from there and Rex had to shift his head because the constant thrashes of Fox's stomach were getting uncomfortable in his neck. "I really liked that middle part", Thorn continued, Fox was officially lost now. "Yeah, never have we heard of such stupidity before", Colt agreed and took another big mouthful.

"You didn't even hear the story yet", Cody whined between sobs and Ponds patted him on the head: "It's alright, Cod'ika, we don't have to if you're not ready yet." Fox let out a pitched, strangled scream and threw his arm over his eyes, his laughing already sounded more like crying in the moment. "Folks, guys, brothers", Rex called, laughing, "Have mercy, he's gonna choke." Fox made a night vision goggles sound before laughing his ass off again. "I think we broke him", Thorn said and received an approving clap on the chest from Colt.

Rex was beginning to feel warm in his skin. The alcohol was taking effect on him now as well but the happiness within the circle of his batchmates was definitely playing a factor in this. He felt like he never wanted to get up again, hearing Fox enjoy himself so much he'd choke on his own spit or Cody now quietly complaining to Ponds about whatever breakneck stunt General Kenobi had pulled off this time or Thorn audibly approving of the way Colt began to card through his thick, paling hair. Rex was happy here surrounded by his brothers in arms. He would never want to trade them for anyone else, not even Torrent Co, and those were a funny and chaotic little pile of ants. He smiled and closed his eyes then pressed his cheek against Fox's warm thigh. This was where he wanted to be right now and nowhere else.

"Rex's enjoying himseeelf", Thorn called out and now suddenly the attention was on Rex. He grinned at them a little sheepishly and tried to hide his blush in Fox's blacks. "Aww, what're ya thinking 'bout, vod'ika?", Colt asked and now even Cody and Ponds rose their heads to look at them. "Ah, nothing", he grinned behind flushed cheeks, "I was just thinking how lucky I am to still have you guys." That erupted a wave of hums and awws from his friends and Fox immediately opened his arms wide. "C'mere lil bro", he slurred and what else could Rex do but comply? He shuffled closer and placed his head on Fox's chest only to get swallowed up by comfortable arms.

He felt the pile tighten around him as the others tried to participate a little in the hug. Rex smiled into Fox's chest and closed his eyes again. "I love you idiots. From deep within my heart", he confessed. "You say that to every batch you've ever been in?", Colt joked and earned himself a slap from Thorn. "Stop killing the fucking mood, Colt", Cody complained. There was a hand between Rex's shoulders that started dragging their nails over his back, which caused comfy goosebumps to trail down his spine. He reached out with his own arm to follow the trail of the comfort bringer to find it was leading back to Thorn. He scratched lightly over his brother's shoulder before resting his hand there which soon was accompanied by Colt's much warmer hand.

A comfortable silence fell around them all and when Rex paid much attention to it he could hear the quiet scritching of Colt's nails on Thorn's scalp or the rub of a hand over blacks. Soon those sounds were drowned out, though, by Fox taking out his feels on Rex's buzzcut.

The even movement of blunt nails on his scalp and the slight fondle on his neck and the regular rise and fall of Fox's ribcage rocked Rex's dreamboat. What if, he thought, it could always be like this? To come home after a long, day of hard work and just lay down and be peaceful with each other. Oh, what wouldn't he give for that?

"I love you, too, brothers", Thorn mumbled after a while. "Mhm", Cody hummed approvingly followed suit by the sound of a kiss. Rex opened his eyes again to see who it had been but they were all laying there comfortably with their eyes closed and arms and legs wrapped around each other. A peaceful picture, laughing into the face of the war. Children, as they were. And he was part of this beautiful, comfortable home.

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe: The Fantastic Mutants chapter 4: The Deadpool and Peridot Show (originally posted on August 29, 2020)

AN: Welcome back to The Fantastic Mutants everyone. This is a very special chapter because here I have a co-writer, whether I like it or not.

Surprise everyone, it's me Deadpool! Since this kid refuses to get his writing done quickly, I've taken it upon myself to "help" him out since no one can understand me better than me. Now then, back to my cohost here.

Yes, Deadpool of all people has decided to help me. Though I'd rather do all of this myself without any distractions.

Kinda like how this author's note is distracting us from the actual main event! Now let's just get this rolling already!

--

We begin on a talk show set in a blank white space, inhabited solely by a drop-dead handsome mercenary dressed in a beautiful shade of red with hints of black that was currently tearing it apart for no good reason. You know him, you love him, it's the sexiest anti-hero to have ever graced this dying industry, Deadpool.

"Thank you, thank you all!" yours truly bowed for an unseen audience as he finished tearing the set apart. "Now if all y'all have been lying under a rock since like, I don't know, '91, I am known as Wade Winston Wilson. I was created by Rob Liefeld and Fabian Niecieza for The New Mutants #98 in February 199-"

"Wade, I believe everyone knows who you are already." My white thinky-box, represented by a bold underline, cut me off. "You're already an Internet legend and of course, there's Ryan Reynolds."

"Can we just can the prologue already?" my yellow thinky-box, also represented by underlining but this time it was in italics. "There's gotta be people coming here solely for us who don't know what's going on."

"Okay wiseguys, you asked for it." the man who looked like a cross between Ryan Reynolds and a Shar-Pei underneath that creepily adorable mask replied. "So in case you guys are just joining us, this is a crossover with the modern classic with some of the most psycho fans in the Internet, Steven Universe." I explained. "Last chapter, our smol sunshine baby of a protagonist was kidnapped by the Master of Magnetism Magneto for some most likely evil science experiment by our favorite evil dictator with a superiority complex to compliment his tiny dick, Doctor Doom. In response, the Crystal Gems have decided that they need more hands on deck, and more characters than this story already needs."

"What does he want this to be, the DC Extended Universe?"

"I'd watch that mouth if I were you buddy." I called the dialogue box out. "Our author here has had experiences with those fans. If that Englishman can think he's free to call MCU fans Marvel Zombies, than he's free to have his own opinion. But someone that fanatical deserves to be called something similar, like a DCheep! Get it, because he's a sheep!"

"Can we please move on? This recap has already taken up two pages and I got real-life things to do." The author begged Wade.

"Okay, okay! Let's get this started already, keep your pants on!" the masked macho-man declared, marching off stage in an alluring fashion. "Cue scenery!"

--

Not too far from Westchester County, there was a shitty apartment where dwelled the hideously scarred human mutate, Wade Wilson. He was out like a light after the badass battle to the death he totally had last night, no joke. Not even a chimichanga could wake him up, and he didn't care that much for them. Yeah, no joke.

"Come on you sack 'a crap, wake up!" his blind, black, elderly roommate Blind Al groaned while fishing Wade out of bed with a snow shovel. "How much off-screen carnage puts you this much to sleep?"

"Enough for readers to get a glimpse of what I do in my spare time." Deadpool declared as he woke up, looking like he had a fantastic night's sleep. "Morning Al, off to do a crossover, see ya later!" he hurriedly greeted the old woman before leaving his room.

"Should I tell him he's not wearing pants?" Al muttered to herself. "Naw, he'll figure it out himself."

--

And figure it out he did. Immediately after that scene, Deadpool was wandering around the street fully clothed and ready to get this chapter over with.

"So, can we have our co-stars please show themselves?"

The author complied by dropping Connie, Peridot, Lapis Lazuli, Bismuth and Nephrite into the scene. "Wait, how did we get here?" Peridot wondered aloud. "And who are you?"

"Ooh, I get to hang with everyone's favorite character!" Deadpool cheered. "I've been writing up jokes about the fans I've been wanting to say for quite a while." He added to the readers while searching his hammerspace for cue cards. "Let me see, Molotov cocktail, big-ass cartoon bomb, reminder to sue Marvel & Capcom for leaving me out of Infinite, God knows how many machine guns."

"Uh, while you're looking for whatever it is you want, let me introduce myself." Connie introduced herself. "My name is Connie, pleased to meet you."

"Hey, can you put your cue-card search on hold and say hi to the kid?"

"Ah, here they are!" Deadpool declared as he fished a series of flashcards from seemingly his butt. "Been wanting to do this for ages." He said before clearing his throat, and he began to read off of them.

"Here are some complaints I have heard about Steven Universe. Complaint #1: literally no one can stay on-model because storyboarding is the devil. Complaint #2: Rebecca Sugar is a total butchphobic abuse supporter because she treats Jasper like crap and lets Lapis off the hook despite the fact that she's even worse."

"Please note that these are clearly not the opinions of the author. He's just been around Tumblr a lot and knows just how these so-called 'fans' think."

"Who said that?" Bismuth wondered aloud. "Oh hey, Bismuth!" Wade exclaimed as he just took notice of her. "That reminds me, Complaint #3: Making Bismuth an antagonist in any way, shape or form is racist because all minorities are pretty little angels than must be defended at all costs despite the facts that we're all human beings who have the potential to be complete balls to the wall sociopathic!"

"Okay, now you're just being used as a mouthpiece for the author. Hey buddy, can you stop him by introducing your version of the X-Force?!"

As a way to shut him up, the writer dropped the X-Force into the current scene on top of Deadpool. Their members, aside from Wilson, consisted of big names like Cable, Domino, Bob & Psylocke, to those who are only familiar to movie-watchers like Copycat, Negasonic Teenage Warhead, Yukio, Bedlam & Shatterstar, and even Outlaw & Fantomex!

"How did we get here?" Cable asked the other black-ops mutants as he got up. "Oh hey Natey, knew you'd come along sooner or later!" Wade greeted his cybernetic compadre. "I was just getting myself introduced to these characters that we'll be paired up with for this crossover."

"Hi, I'm Bob, Wade's best friend!" the HYDRA agent Bob cheerfully introduced himself. "Name's Domino." Neena Thurman responded.

"A pleasure to meet you, dearest jeune fille bleue." Fantomex greeted Lapis in a gentlemanly fashion. "You may call me Fantomex. "

"Charmed." Lapis replied.

"Wow, everyone wants Lapis! First Fandral, and now Fanto."

"Can you blame her? She's the writer's fave and top SU waifu! Favoritism much?"

"Name's Negasonic Teenage Warhead." Ellie Phimster introduced herself. "This here is Yukio." She added gesturing to a Japanese girl with pink hair and a big smile. "Hi there!"

"I'm Wade's girlfriend Vanessa, though a lot of people call me Copycat since that's my power." Vanessa stated. "Yeah, totally original."

"Call me Bedlam." Bedlam stated. "And this here is Shatterstar. Unlike the rest of us, he's an alien from the Mojoverse."

"And finally, these are Outlaw and Psylocke." Shatterstar gestured to the cowgirl and the ninja in the one piece. "Nice to meet ya." Inez Temple greeted. "Indeed." Betsy Braddock added.

"So, what brings you to my neck of the woods?" Deadpool asked Connie. "Don't give too much away, cause I already got a basic knowledge of what happened last chapter."

"Chapter?" Connie tilted her head in confusion. "Steven was kidnapped only an hour ago! What do you think this is, some kind of story?"

"You'd be surprised Girl-Who-Wasn't-Actually-Dressed-As-Gohan-In-That-One-Episode." The Merc with a Mouth grinned underneath his mask. Before anyone could move on however, a stereotypical overweight nerd who looks like he doesn't get out much wheeled in on an automated scooter with a plate of brownies in front of him. "And you are?"

"I am simply an SU Critical that wants to congratulate you for making my voice heard." The nerd congratulated Deadpool. "As a way of saying thanks, have some brownies."

"I get it! Deadpool won some brownie points!"

"Don't explain the joke dumbass. The punchline should be coming up now."

As Wade snacked on the brownies, he came to realize something was wrong with them. "Hey wait a second. Yo, stereotype! Why do these brownies taste like literal dogshit?!"

"That's my secret ingredient!" the nerd revealed, much to Wade's disgust and he angrily tossed the brownies on the ground. "It's to symbolize how I believe Steven Universe has gone bad ever since the barn arc ended since absolutely nothing can compare to the amazing character development Peridot got!"

"Oh, it's so nice to see someone notice my splendidness!" Peridot blushed as she felt humbled by the nerd. "Of course, then they had to devolve her into a mindless comic relief who only-"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING MINDLESS COMIC RELIEF YOU CLOD?!" the small Gem shrieked furiously before she pounced on the basement dweller and began choking him. "I'll teach you to talk back to me immediately after giving my praises you hypocrite!"

As Peridot continued assaulting the nerd, everyone else watched in either shock, bemusement or in Deadpool's case, pride. "I think I want to be her new bestest friend already."

"But I thought we were friends!" Bob weeped sadly while Bedlam gave him a comforting pat on the head.

--

"And now it's time for a cutaway gag!"

"Cutaway gags? You gotta be kidding me, we're not Family Guy!"

"Just let the writer do his thing man, it's his imagination!"

--

"Come on Willy, I know you can do it!" a child version of Deadpool called to a whale in a scene that is clearly a reference to a certain all-time classic "Boy and his non-human friend" story. However just as Willy finally leaped over the rock Wade was standing on, he was immediately harpooned in midair and dragged towards a pirate ship manned by Captain Ahab. "Hey, wrong whale story Habbo Hotel!"

"After so many years of searching, that accursed whale is now mine to profit off!" Ahab and his crew celebrated their capture. "I'm talking sequels and an animated series to start, but the sky's the limit!"

"This ain't the last you'll see of me Old Thunder!" Wade cursed the sea captain as he made off with his prize. "I'll bring that whale home, just you wait!"

--

"Okay, that's a pretty unique idea for a gag. But seriously, back to the show."

--

"So, we're here because Magneto has kidnapped Steven with a bunch of Sentinels." Connie recapped to Deadpool while they were out and about in the city. "Now that you know what we're doing, can you tell us what you do?"

"I'm glad you asked Connie." Deadpool declared. "Allow me to explain the only way you Steven Universe characters probably know how. IN SONG!"

"Wait, a musical number, in a fanfiction?! Seriously?!"

"Hey shut it, this is gonna be good!"

"Lights please." Wade announced, shutting off the lights with a snap of his fingers, and turning them back on with another snap. He was now dressed as an Elvis impersonator with Cable, Domino, Bob and Copycat as his band. "What song do you plan on playing?" Vanessa asked her boyfriend.

"Just watch and listen." Wade responded, and began playing a parody of a classic movie song. "Here I go!" he started singing while Cable provided backup on the drums. "Woo! Ah-ha, ah-ha, let me show you what I work with!"

"Well Gambit was in league with a bunch of thieves, Cyclops has almost two thousand tales!" For his first act of insanity, the Regenerating Degenerate made about fifty longboxes filled with comics appear for Peridot & Lapis to rifle through. As soon as they discovered one with Wade fighting a vampire bat creature on the cover titled "Deadpool: The Gauntlet," the Deadpool on the cover continued the song.

"Well my friends, you're in luck cause up your sleeves, you got a kind of guy that never fails!" After Deadpool emerged from the issue Peridot was holding, he shot down various villains emerging from the other comics while singing.

"You got a real badass in your corner now, a real Wolverine type in your camp!" he then demonstrated by transforming his face into that of Logan's and then back again before letting bullets rain from above. "He can shoot, kablam! Bullets galore, all you gotta do is say my name!" Wade crooned. "And I'll say: 'Miss Peridot and Lapis Lazuli, what will your pleasure be?'"

As he sat the Gems down on a beach blanket, Deadpool then assumed pirate attire and set a heavy treasure chest on the ground. "Just give me a guy and I'll shoot him down, you ain't had a mercenary like me!"

Peridot began to excitedly open the chest while Lapis rolled her eyes. "Life's like a treasure chest," Wade's disembodied voice continued. When the treasure box was opened, the mercenary exploded out of it and made gold fly everywhere. "AND I'M GONNA BE YOUR KEY!"

Unlike her smaller partner, Lapis was still not amused. "C'mon, whisper to me what you want," Wade kept crooning, followed by splitting himself into four smaller Deadpools. "You ain't had a mercenary like me!"

"Contractors pride ourselves on service." One of the mini-Wades stated, and then they merged into the prime Wilson while spawning a lavish couch for his two guests. "You girls the hoss, the queens, the Shah! No matter what you wish, I'll be your bitch! How 'bout a few chimichangas?"

"Have some of Sample A, try all of Sample B!" Following the chimichanga rain, Peridot and Lapis were handed free samples at a supermarket before they found themselves on a velvet pillow held by Wade. "Anytime, any day, I'll help you babes. You ain't had a mercenary like me!"

A brief dance number then ensued between Deadpool and his hands. His left hand vocalized and the degenerate replied with an "Oh my!" When the right hand started singing, it was responded with "No no!" Both hands harmonized and they got a "Ha ha ha!" They sandwiched Deadpool between them as he peaced out with a "Zip-a-dee doo-dah!"

When Deadpool returned, he pointed straight at Peridot. "Give me a good badda-yadda-yadda!"

"Badda-yadda-yadda!" Peridot excitedly repeated. "Good, scotty-wop!" Wade then pointed to Lapis. Her reply was more unsure. "Uh, scotty-wop?"

"Everybody now!" Deadpool compelled the readers. "Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo!"

"Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo!" the readers answered excitedly.

"Yeah, y'all got it!" Wade congratulated before proceeding to demonstrate his healing factor. "Can your friends do this?" he asked, casually dislocating his arms. "Can your friends do that?" he added, ripping out his spinal cord to bounce on it like a certain stuffed tiger. "Can your friends pull this?" With that, Wade tore his skeleton out of his body and started dancing the Charleston with it. "Out a little hat?!"

Suddenly, Wade's skeleton started filling itself with dynamite sticks on the verge of exploding. "CAN YOUR FRIENDS GO-" The human mutate was interrupted as the TNT exploded, and the clouds gave way to him beatboxing while doing a silly dance.

"Call me the Merc with a Mouth, I am always there. North, West, East and South! So don't sit there slackjawed, all buggy-eyed! I'm here to answer all ya evening prayers!" he continued. "You got me bona-fide certified! A hired gun for your charge affair!"

"I got a powerful urge to help you out! So who's gonna die? I really need to know!" Deadpool said as the song began to reach its climax while pulling a long strip of paper from Peridot's mouth and began rubbing his bottom with it. "You got a list that's three miles long no doubt. So all you gotta do is pay-wayho!"

For the final setpiece, Peridot and Lapis now stood atop a mountain of dead Marvel characters that are so obscure, not even the most hardcore fans knew a thing about them. "Miss Peridot and Lapis Lazuli, what will your pleasure be?" Wade asked tunefully. Peridot then picked up one body, and its head suddenly turned into Deadpool's. "Anytime anyplace, I'll help you babes."

A few bodies rose from the dead, only for Deadpool to shoot them all down. "You ain't had a mercenary, never had a mercenary." He concluded. "You ain't had a mercenary, never had a mercenary."

Bullets once again began raining, along with all sorts of violent weapons as the song finally ended. "YOU AIN'T, HAD A, MERCE-NARY LIIIII-IIIIIKE MEEEEE!"

With the X-Force performing a kickline to finish things off, Deadpool pulled on a string dangling from above. "You ain't had a mercenary like me!" A flickering neon applause sign dropped down, capping off the rather pointless number.

--

"Well, that was a waste of time that'll never be spoken of again."

"Sincerest apologies to Alan Menken, Howard Ashman and especially Robin Williams. He would've been 69 this year. NICE!"

--

"Okay you generic-looking monster, time to discover who you truly are!" Connie declared to a captured Sasquatch while she, Peridot, Deadpool, Lapis and Cable were dressed as a certain band of meddling kids and their voracious canine pal. Connie ripped off the Sasquatch's head to reveal that it was a mask worn by an evil parrot with a scar across his face.

"Zoinks! Like, it's a parrot!" Deadpool declared in a beatnik voice. "Wait, a parrot? Is that all?"

"Far from it mein friends!" the parrot answered in a German accent. Suddenly, large robots kicked the walls around them down. "Behold, my Nazi robots!"

"N-Nazi robots?" Lapis stuttered. "Jeepers, this is just getting too weird."

Deadpool then glanced expectantly at Cable, who groaned while pushing up his glasses. "C'mon Cabey, say the line!" he exhorted the cyborg. With a heavy groan, Cable quietly said "Jinkies, run."

"He's right, let's split up gang!" Connie commanded, and the crew were off to the races. After passing by the same flowerpot approximately five times because there wasn't that much in the budget, the five came across a hallway littered with doors.

When Deadpool and Peridot burst into one door, they came out of another not too faraway, same with the others. However at the end of a door, they came across a blue digital ghost with yellow eyes & teeth and a grainy laugh.

"Ruh roh, rit's Rames Rarles the Rindly Rohnny!" Peridot exclaimed, making every word she spoke begin with R before she coughed. "How does anyone speak like this?" she asked Wade. "Because speech impediments are funny!" the mercenary replied. "Now let's move!"

"Seriously, why can't I be Fred?!" Cable complained while emerging from another door with Deadpool by his side instead of Lapis. "Connie gets the cool ascot, and all I'm left with is this bulky sweater and a short skirt!"

"Well for one, that skirt actually looks pretty cute on you." Wade answered with a stupidly cheeky grin on his face. Before anyone else could charge through more doors, zombie cats and dinosaurs that could move without thinking came charging in. "Wow, Scooby-Doo became a lot weirder than when I was a youngin."

--

Returning to the real world, the Crystal Temps and the X-Force have just plowed through an entire armed squadron inhabiting a conveniently abandoned office building and now had their leader tied up in a chair. "We ain't gonna let all those hallway fights amount to nothing!" Wade declared holding the squadron leader at gunpoint. "We've tried every torture technique in the book: eating your own food, threatening your family, doing a silly dance to some awesome music and yet still you won't talk!" he exclaimed. "So let me ask this again! What does the guy who gave Magneto & Doctor Doom those Sentinels look like?"

"What?" the gunman asked nervously, causing Wade to smash another wall. "WHAT COUNTRY ARE YOU FROM?!" the mercenary shrieked. "What?" the captive continued squeaking. "WHAT AIN'T NO COUNTRY I EVER HEARD OF!" Deadpool yelled. "THEY SPEAK ENGLISH IN WHAT?!"

"What?" the man said a third time. "ENGLISH MOTHER-" Deadpool began, but then he noticed the T-rating and groaned. "ENGLISH YOU BASTARD, DO YOU SPEAK IT?!" he reiterated. "YES!" the gunman finally said something other than what. "THEN YOU MUST KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!" Deadpool kept yelling. "WHAT DOES YOUR MASTER LOOK LIKE?!"

"We could just beat the info outta him and be done with it." Bedlam advised. "No need for all this Pulp Fiction parody crap."

"Was I talking to you?" Wade asked his teammate tersely before going back to his captive. "Now where was I? Oh yeah! Does he look like a bitch?"

"Now you're just skipping lines!" the gunman squealed in defiance. "What else do you wanna do with me?!"

"Okay, I got another question for you." Wade stated. "Have you had your prostate exam lately?"

"What?" the gunman muttered, fearing what could come next. "In fact, I got just the girl to help me." Wade declared. "Hey Connie, your MILF of a mom is a doctor right? Surely you must know what I'm talking about!"

"Yeah, pretty much!" Connie answered. "Here, lend me your sword. We might need to operate." Deadpool said as he menacingly snapped on a pair of rubber gloves. "Hey author, why don't we cut to another scene before this gets too violent?"

--

"Now then, what are we working with he-There it is!"

"AUGH!"

--

Elsewhere, a stereotypical shadowy figure watched from a large video screen as the X-Force tore through his mercenaries. "That masked maniac is onto us!" he growled quietly while pounding his fist on an armrest and turned his chair to face Ruckus, Gorgeous George, Hairbag, Ramrod & Slab, the Nasty Boyz. "You five track him & those rainbow women down and kill them all!"

"Yes sir." The Nasty Boyz complied and set off for the Merc with a Mouth. "Now where do you suppose the merc could be now?" Hairbag asked his fellow Boyz. "My best guess, he's probably at that Hellhouse run by Patch." the Southern-accented Slab theorized. "Hopefully they have room for his head as a trophy."

--

"Well here we are at Saint Margaret's School for Wayward Children." Deadpool decreed as he suddenly parked a limo that he totally always had in front of the mercenary dispatch center he loved frequenting. "I suggest you try not to look at some of its inhabitants funny, some of them can get a little ballistic."

Entering the bar, the two teams had all eyes on them by all the other mercs at the establishment. "Uh, hello there." Connie nervously greeted one of them. "I don't think you're old enough to be here little girl." The mercenary replied ominously. "Don't worry Jessica, they're with me." Deadpool told the larger man. "So, where's Weasel?"

"Right here old buddy!" the bespectacled bartender called for Wade. "Hey, Weasel!" Wade exclaimed to his old friend while sitting down at the bar and exchanging a fistbump. "I see you're doing well Poolboy." Weasel said to his friend. "And who's the green midget with you?"

"This is Peridot, a member of the Crystal Gems." Shatterstar introduced Peridot. "Oh, you mean those rock ladies that creamed those Chitauri only to get creamed by Thanos?" Weasel asked, making Peridot pretty mad. "Hey, we creamed Thanos right back!"

"We're looking for information sir." Connie said to Weasel. "A friend of mine has been captured by Magneto & Doctor Doom using those Sentinel robots, and we want to know where they've come from."

"You want confidential info little girl?" the barkeep stated. "Go see Multiple Man over there at that poker table, he's usually the guy to talk to since he's a detective."

"Yet one mystery he can't solve is the mystery of why he can never get his own movie."

"ZING!"

At a nearby poker table, Jamie Madrox and some of his duplicates were playing cards with the albino mutant Caliban, and the four Jamies clearly had the upper hand. "All in!" one of the clones declared shoving his chips into the pot. "I know you are cheating Madrox." Caliban informed his opponent. "I mean, there are literally four of you!"

Just then, Deadpool abruptly shot one of the clones dead and sat down where he once was. "Deal me in." he simply declared as if nothing happened. "Caliban welcomes you Mr. Pool." Caliban nervously greeted the regenerating degenerate. "And who is your little friend?"

"You may call me Peridot, the suave, attractive and positively adorable leader of the Crystal Gems!" Peridot introduced herself arrogantly. "So, you more members of the X-Men? Haven't seen you around the mansion."

"Actually, we're members of a different team of mutants." Madrox replied, while his surviving doubles sadly carried their dead comrade away. "There are actually quite a lot of them you see. X-Factor; the one we're a part of, X-Statix, Excalibur, Generation X, the Morlocks and most famously Alpha Flight."

"Half of them sound so late 20th to early 21st century." Peridot commented. "I mean, X-Statix? Talk about totally cool dudes!"

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. "Is this Saint Margaret's? We'd like to have a word with the owner." A voice came from the other side, catching all the patrons and employees off-guard. All was quiet, but then the Nasty Boyz came crashing through the wall instead of the door. "LET'S GET NASTY!" they all cried out, springing into action.

"Alright, what the shit is going on here?!" Bob "Patch" Stirrat, the elderly owner of Saint Margaret's growled, emerging from another room while stroking his big bushy mustache. "Oh god, it's the Nasty Boyz."

"The Nasty Boyz?" Peridot and Lapis repeated in unison before they laughed at the evil mutant team's name. Suddenly, the wood tables of the bar came to life and changed their form thanks to Ramrod, who used them to restrain everyone aside from Deadpool. "Okay boys, frisk him."

On Ramrod's orders, Gorgeous George used his shapeshifting powers to grab Wade by the ankles and dangle him above the ground. "Let's see what he's got here." Ruckus muttered, fishing through the belongings dropped as Wade was shaken up and down. "Various pistols, swords, nunchucks, staves, forks, a bazooka."

"Most of those were from a Ninja Turtles convention I went to last year." Wade revealed. "Don't know where the bazooka came from."

"Rubber chicken, five month old bag of pizza pockets; that are still warm," Slab continued for his teammate. "Ryan Reynolds's phone number, large collection of nude selfies from Thumbelin-WHAT?!"

To Slab's absolute shock and fury, he found an overfilled file of lewd pictures taken by his sister Kristina Anderson with her phone number on it, along with a message saying "I bet you want more, my raging sex machine!" Crushing the file in his hand, Slab furiously glared at Deadpool. "Wilson, you son of a bitch!"

"Geez Chris, I thought you had a sense of humor." Wade grinned cheekily. "After all, SHE'S YOUR SISTER!" Then like Thor returning Mjolnir to his hand, the mercenary wiggled his fingers to call one of his katana blades back and free himself from Gorgeous George before rescuing his friends. "SSSSSSmokin'!" he hissed before spin-dashing out of the bar.

"After that degenerate!" Hairbag exclaimed while Slab frothed in wordless rage and the Boyz gave chase, leaving the bar in tatters. "Hey, which of you assholes is gonna clean this up?!" Patch exclaimed, but then he answered his own question by handing Weasel a broom.

--

"Everyone, to the Deadpoolmobile!" Deadpool exclaimed as the X-Force and Crystal Temps piled into the limousine from earlier. "Where did you ever get this car anyways?" Bismuth asked him, and he replied. "Don't think about it!"

Far across the city, Robert Kelly was left facepalming and a colleague of his scratching his head when they discovered that one of Kelly's limos was missing, its place taken by a graffiti message saying "I O U".

"I hate that Deadpool." Senator Kelly groaned.

--

"You get back here this instant you red-masked c-" Slab called for Deadpool as the Nasty Boyz chased them in a stolen taxi, but his cursing was cut off by Deadpool popping out the sunroof of the limousine to open fire on them.

"Wait, if Deadpool is up there, then who is driving?" Connie asked the group, and that's when Yukio made a shocking realization. "Oh my god, Demon Bear is driving!" she exclaimed pointing to a demonic bear that was taking the wheel. "How can that be?!"

--

"That's right folks, Lawrence Abrams is here to report that the insanely infamous insane mercenary Deadpool has started an intense car chase where he's hijacked a limo belonging to Senator Robert Kelly and is being chased by a group of other mutants called the Nasty Boyz." Lawrence Abrams said on the television at the Baxter Building, where Garnet, Pearl, Colossus and Wolverine had now caught wind of the event. "And there's also some kinda bear driving the limo for some reason. Why's there a bear?! Who gives a damn! And now onto Sally Floyd with politics!"

"Deadpool." Colossus glowered in embarrassment. "Come my friends, we must go and handle this crisis ourselves." He declared while preparing to leave the building. "But you let Connie go on that mission for her optimism." Pearl stated to the metal mutant while setting Reed and Sue's young son Franklin Richards on the floor.

"We know Pearl, but that maniac is a whole 'nother level of unpredictable." Wolverine grumbled. "And there's a high chance Connie's life is at risk here! Right Garnet?"

"Logan is correct. I can see multiple paths where things go horribly wrong." Garnet agreed with Logan. "Oh, you're leaving already?" Franklin's older sister Valeria asked them. "Mom and Dad were just about to introduce you to H.E.R.B.I.E."

"It's alright Valeria, they still have friends to help." Susan assured her daughter. "Go on Gems, we'll catch up with you back at the mansion."

"It's been a pleasure to be shown around the Baxter Building and meeting the kids Sue." Pearl said gratefully and shook the Invisible Woman's hand. "I especially like how Franklin reminds me of Steven."

"Bye Ms. Pearl!" Franklin said goodbye by hugging the tall Gem's leg. "Oh, goodbye to you too Frank." Pearl replied. "Hey, what about me?!" the Four's AI H.E.R.B.I.E exclaimed irritably. "Don't I get anything to say?!"

--

"Oy Cain, you gotta check this out!" Black Tom called to Juggernaut while he was watching TV. The Brotherhood of Mutants had stopped to refuel their ship and Black Tom had run off on his own when he discovered a TV shop playing the same news report of Deadpool's car chase. "What say we give Deadpool an old one-two before Mags finishes up?"

"You son of a bitch, I'm in!" Juggernaut exclaimed eagerly, giving his teammate a fist-bump that knocked Tom to the ground. "You okay there?"

--

"We have your limousine surrounded! Come out of the vehicle with your hands in the air!" a police officer barked into a bullhorn as they had Deadpool and pals backed into a corner. "I would make a police brutality joke, but even I know that would be too soon." Wade said to the readers as he screeched the limo to a stop, making donuts on the street and damaging numerous police cars in the process.

"Okay, now you're just either showing off or defying us." The cop with the megaphone japed. Just then, a mighty thud briefly shook the ground. And another. And another. And another. And-

"Quit stalling writer, we know who it is! It's the goddamn Juggernaut!" Deadpool interrupted the third-person omniscient narrator. "Literally everyone and their goddamn long lost relatives know who he is!" The mighty Juggernaut continued inching closer to the fanboying mercenary while the police scattered out of fear of him and Peridot poked her head out the sunroof to see what was up.

"Uh, Wade?" the petite Gem squeaked nervously. "You know who that is right?"

"Didn't I just say that it's ol' Juggernaut?!" Wade exclaimed to his new best friend. "Oh, the things I could say about how much of a badass he is! This guy has beaten the shit outta Cyttorak, the Thing, Colossus, Blob & Thor and even called banging She-Hulk a stalemate! Maybe, that last one was actually a cl-"

Before Deadpool could finish the sentence, Juggernaut grabbed him by the neck with just two fingers and brought him very close to his helmeted face. "Hello Wade." He beamed callously. "Hey Cainy, is that new toothpaste I smell?" Deadpool greeted him nervously. "What flavor is it this time, Feeling Bad About Your Shitty Mutant Powers So You Get New Ones from Cyttorak?"

"Goddamn he went there." Black Tom muttered, only to receive a glare from his partner.

"Deadpool!" Garnet called for the Merc with a Mouth as she, Pearl, Colossus and Wolverine entered the scene. "Oh, hey guys." Peridot nervously waved to her fellow Crystal Gems. "What brings you here?"

"We came here to take control of this current situation." Pearl explained. "No matter how much you want to swear and kill and all sorts of other crass activities, we still need your help in saving a friend of ours."

"I appreciate you want me to be more involved in this story Mordecai," Wade said to Pearl. "but can this wait a bit? I'm currently in the middle of worshipping the Juggernaut, bit-"

However within seconds, Deadpool was mashed into the ground by Juggernaut, leaving only a few scattered body parts lying in a puddle of blood. "Oh, so rude!" his disembodied head declared indignantly. "And to think we were buddies at one time Marky-Mark." He then turned to face the audience one last time before the degenerate would meet his not very possible untimely end. "But since I'm literally nothing but blood, my head, a few fingers, an upper arm and my dick right now, let's lighten the mood a little with some more gags, shall we?"

"As if we didn't waste enough time already."

--

"I love the smell of 372,844 pancakes in the morning." Deadpool declared as he flipped his last pancake and added it to the growing mountain of pancakes. "Smells like victory!"

"Why on Earth would you need this many pancakes?" Bismuth asked while Deadpool turned on the ceiling sprinklers to pour maple syrup all over each and every one of them at once. "Well, that's pretty clever I'll admit."

--

"Okay Peridot, ace this test and you're on the team!" Wade, now a coach for the girls' swim team comprised of Lapis, Bismuth, Domino, Warhead, Yukio, Outlaw, Copycat, Psylocke & Nephrite, announced to their soon to be newest member Peridot while she prepared to dive.

"This is it Peri, get this right and you'll make everyone proud!" Peridot muttered to herself while adjusting her cap and gazing at Lapis. As soon as Coach Wade blew the whistle, Peridot leaped into the water…and soon began struggling to keep herself afloat in a very exaggerated manner. "AAAAAGH, SOMEONE HELP! LIFEGUARD, COACH, SOS! THIS WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA!" she shrieked for help before the chlorinated water won out and she sank to the bottom.

"I'll save you!" Cable roared while assuming the role of a lifeguard, preparing to jump in the water after her when Wade stopped him. "No no, wait for the punchline."

When Peridot finally breached the surface, she dramatically gasped for air and then frantically paddled towards the end of the pool, grabbing the ledge with a serious expression on her face. "So, how do you like my swimming?" she asked, acting like nothing had happened. However, no one else was there to answer except for Deadpool. "Hey, where did everyone go?!"

"They jumped ship an hour ago because they were tired of waiting." Wade answered. "But you still get on the team cause you really made me laugh."

--

"Gotta say Lapis, we got quite a team here." Deadpool remarked proudly to his fellow baseball player Lapis. "Uh, yeah, they're great." Lapis nervously replied while failing to get the joke. "So, who's on first?"

"Yeah, and what's on second." Wade responded eagerly. "No, I want to know who's on first." Lapis continued asking. "Exactly! We already established that who's on first, what's on second and I don't know is third."

"Wait, do you not know their names or are those seriously what they're called?" the ocean Gem asked, causing great irritation for her team captain. "Dammit Lapis, you spoiled the punchline!" he reprimanded her. "In fact, this whole Abbott and Costello tribute was just an excuse to see you dress up as Bob again! I mean, can you blame me with those shorts?"

"Abbott and who now?" Lapis remarked with a raised eyebrow.

"You really need to get out more." Wade deadpanned, lowering his eyelids in response.

--

"Welcome back one and all to Celebrity Jeopardy." Pearl announced, now dressed as Alex Trebek. "Now before we proceed, I'd like to apologize on the behalf of our contestants to all viewers with rather unusual lifestyles. We here at the studio refuse to judge anyone based on how they live, and sincerely hope you accept our apologies. Now then, let's proceed with our contestants."

Deadpool was in the podium closest to Pearl, now dressed as Sean Connery. "Mr. Connery is in first place with only -1 dollar." Pearl began recapping for the viewers at home. "About as many points as your mother gave you!" Wade cackled.

"Classy." Pearl responded crossly before shining the spotlight on Lewis Black, aka Peridot. "Mr. Black now has a score of, shockingly enough, -6,000 dollars." She explained, prompting the small Gem turned abrasive comedian to climb up on top of her podium in the middle. "Is that enough to buy my own bus?"

"And finally, Josh Brolin, now having raised 35 dollars." Pearl concluded while Juggernaut assumed the role of the aforementioned actor many may know as a certain Mad Titan. "I don't feel so good." Cain muttered. "Damn, walked right into that one!"

"Very well then. With introductions out of the way, let's move onto the board." Pearl stated, moving her eyes from the podiums to the categories. "Tonight our categories are Annals of History, Potent Potables, What Bulls Hit, Jokes, Popular Foreign Television, Places with Names Ending in 'Nia' and Video Games." Deadpool then pressed his buzzer. "Mr. Connery, you have the board."

"I'll take What Bullshit for $500 Al." Wade announced with a stupid grin on his face, clearly misreading the category he had chosen. "And I can tell you plenty of things that are bullshit."

"No, it clearly says What Bulls-" Pearl began to correct the masked contestant before she came to a realization. "Whoa! Okay, walked right into that one. Anyways, the question is: "It is commonly believed bulls are enraged by this color". Mr. Connery?"

"I'll tell you something I've hit recently." Deadpool chortled. "Hit up a few bars over the past week while hanging with your mom. She and I had a wonderful time, if you get what I mean! Wink wink, nudge nudge."

"I don't even have a mother!" Pearl ranted hotly. "And can we please return to what was happening earlier?! These pop culture references are nothing but a waste of time!"

"Thank you!"

"Boldface, you ignorant slut."

--

"Oh no, Wade!" Peridot yelled for Deadpool as she dashed out the limo to check on the puddle of blood and body parts that was once her new friend. "Please speak to us you clod, you can't die like this!"

"That's because I can't!" Deadpool proudly declared and in a beautiful Disney-like spectacle, slowly reassembled himself until he was the full-bodied lovable manic once again. "Healing factor baby! Got it when some asshole tried to cure my cancer, along with looking like a walking tumor."

"Uh hey, remember us?" the Nasty Boyz cried out in unison, catching the merc's attention. "Oh right, you guys. Gotta wrap up the chapter somehow." As a result, Wade opened fire on the evil mutants, shooting them in the arms, kneecaps and especially their dicks. "Oh and Bismuth, Peridot? You guys got Black Tom & Juggies. I'll take Garnet and Pearl!"

"You got it, I guess." Bismuth complied before she and her little friend squared off with Cassidy & Cain, leaving Wade alone against the senior Crystal Gems.

"Hey, what about us?" Lapis asked the writer, who responded by typing, "Didn't think that far ahead. You guys can just do crowd control."

"Okay Q-Bert and Drinking Bird," Deadpool exclaimed. "you two may have thousands of years of battle experience on your show but in terms of franchise ages, I've been doing this for far longer! There was even a graphic novel trilogy where an actually insane version of me killed the rest of Marvel, tons of classic literature characters and even other versions of me!"

"Do you have any idea what he's saying anymore?" Pearl asked Garnet. "I'm not sure. I fear he may be too unpredictable for us to comprehend!" Garnet answered fearfully. "You can try if you want." Deadpool beckoned them with a silly dance. "But I can assure you that hilarity will ensue!"

Pearl leaped at the Merc with a Mouth, but she was quickly denied a hit when Wade did a pirouette and kicked her in the back, sending her flying into a lamppost. "See, what did I tells ya?!"

Garnet tried her hand at attacking by enlarging her gauntlets & launching them at her foe, but they proved to be useless against him. Deadpool then rapidly fired his gun at Garnet, but she blocked all the bullets with her gauntlets and then finally moved so fast, not even Deadpool could catch her and was punched in the face.

"Wow okay, you got the guts!" Wade yelled while readjusting his head from the hit. "Seems like I really am a bit outmatched by you Garnet. Or maybe a certain someone just wants to make things fair!"

"Come on you maniac, what else can you throw at us?!" Pearl asked pointing her spear. "Oh what else can I throw?" Deadpool replied, letting out a sinister giggle while wearing a pair of shiny glasses and clasping his fingers together. "Let me show you!"

Whipping out his katana blades, Deadpool laughed maniacally while using them to tear the background apart, leaving nothing but a blank white space behind. "WELCOME CRYSTAL GEMS TO MY TURF! I PRESENT TO YOU THE FOURTH WALL, WHERE LOGIC IS JUST AS ILLEGAL AS JAYWALKING!"

"This is starting to remind me of that Uncle person." Pearl muttered in awe. "I thought we promised to never speak of that man again." Garnet instructed the former servant. "Well if he wants to make jokes and talk to the audience, then so can we."

When the two Gems joined hand, there was a bright shimmer as the pair merged into the returning glamorous Sardonyx. "Ladies, gentlemen and everyone in-between, the Gem Hostess with the Mostest has finally returned!" the fusion of Garnet and Pearl announced. "And it seems we have a very special guest star today."

"Sardonyx, huh?" Deadpool muttered while scrolling through the Steven Universe wiki for statistics. "Oh I see, she's here because we can both break the fourth wall!"

"A worthy opponent for you I must say!" Sardonyx chortled before smashing Deadpool in with her hammer. "Of course you realize this means war!" Wade roared, proceeding to whip out numerous cartoon guns, launching them all at once. "RATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATA-RATA!" he screamed while launching lead at his fusion foe, following up with a declaration of "Omae wa mou shindeiru."

"N-NANI?!" Sardonyx cried out in shock before she spontaneously combusted with a cry of "HIDEBU!" However, the explosion cleared up and she was perfectly fine. "Psyche! Hammer time!"

Before Sardonyx could hit Deadpool with the hammer again, he disappeared into a cartoon hole like it were a solid object and reappeared out another. "Ha, that Spot douche should take notes from-OH GOD!"

"Anyone up for Whack-A-Mole?!" Sardonyx exclaimed, proceeding to whack her opponent multiple times with her hammer before he vanished and popped out another hole. And another, and another, and another, and another, until the hiding began to tire him out. "Jesus she's good." Wade panted, and then he began to make a plan. "I swore that I would never use this the moment I stole it from those schmoes, but I'm left with no choice!"

Sticking a hand up his red-clad butt, Deadpool pulled it out while holding a small black jewel that seemed similar to the Infinity Stones. "Ough, I also swore to never use it again because looking for it is a literal pain in my ass!"

"That Infinity Stone isn't canon!" Sardonyx objected while sounding like a stereotypical nerd. "Oh it may not be canon my dear, but we're in the Fourth Wall where anything could happen." Deadpool explained deviously. "With this Continuity Stone, I could warp all reality to my whims! I could use it to go back in time and erase One More Day by preventing Civil War from happening, or maybe beat the shit outta that Judas Traveller prick and his butt-buddies! But what I plan on doing now is using this stone to erase you from this reality once and for all!"

"Oh no, I don't feel so good!" Sardonyx dramatically announced as she felt herself fading away. "I'm melting! Melting! Oh what a world, what a world!" With that, the fusion finally vanished and presumably Garnet & Pearl as well. As Deadpool let out a heavy sigh, he suddenly realized that the Continuity Stone was now missing. "What the?! Where did it go!?"

"Looking for something Ninja Spidey?" a familiar voice rang out. Sardonyx was now back to normal and smugly held the Stone in her hand, setting it down like a golfball and swinging it at Deadpool's eye, causing his body to explode.

"Can I at least get one F-bomb in Mr. Author Man? Please?" Wade begged the author by putting on his best puppy dog eyes until his disembodied head landed in one of Sardonyx's hands. "To be or not to be," she began quoting Shakespeare. "That is the question."

"I got a question." The mercenary's head growled angrily. "On a scale from one to ten, how much do you think I FUCKING hate you?"

"Watch the mouth sonny, children could be reading this!" Sardonyx chortled. "Now then, let's finish this chapter!"

--

One bypass of the chapter break later, Sardonyx and the defeated Deadpool were now out of the Fourth Wall and back in the real world where the Nasty Boyz, Juggernaut & Black Tom were now nowhere to be seen.

"Okay, I give up!" Deadpool complained while his body began to regenerate. "I'll go with your stupid plan! Didn't really need to treat me like how Pearl killed that one Irishman during the Easter Rising."

"It was an accident!" Pearl exclaimed as she and Garnet defused. "And how did you possibly know?"

"But before we move onto the next chapter, can we make a quick stop first?" Deadpool asked. "There's a joke I think needs resolving."

--

"You'll never take the whale from me Wilson!" Captain Ahab exclaimed as he engaged in a swordfight with the dread pirate Straw Hat Deadpool and his motley crew. "I'll surrender when I get eaten alive!"

"Funny you should mention that Habbo." First Mate Peridot sneered before she whistled loudly for Willy to breach the surface, breaking most of Ahab's ship and swallowing him whole. "I'll get you for this Wade!" Ahab shrieked vengefully. "You haven't seen the last of me!"

When Ahab was finally swallowed, Willy gave the pirates his farewells and dove back into the water, free again at last.

"What did parodying both Free Willy and Moby Dick have to do with anything?" Pearl asked Straw Hat Deadpool. "You know what? After what I've experienced, I don't think I want to know."

--

At long last, the chapter is done! Good thing too, because my partner has just started college as we write this and all that education is gonna cut into his freetime!

Yes indeed, the next chapter will take a bit longer to come out because of college. But I still get a few months off soon, so there you go.

Well, that should settle it. You get some free writing done and I won't take your ANDY ONLY stuff. Hasta luego amigo! And be sure to give my regards to your mom!

[kirayun]

The Journey Of Destiny (Eng. Version) - S1E01: Pilot

AO3 Link

Previous Chapter Tumblr: X

Summary: Skye and Jemma thought they had missed their chance and would never see each other again. But on the first day of work for Agent Coulson's new team, the two girls get a big surprise. 

Jemma Simmons was excited for this new adventure, the opportunity to be on this chosen team alongside her best friend and investigate all that was mysterious and new. They had already started with something big: an explosion and an apparent new superhero out on the streets. Apparently they also had a lead on a hacker belonging to The Rising Tide that Agent Coulson and Agent Ward had gone to pick up, but she had been assigned with Fitz and Agent May to inspect the explosion site.

During the trip his mind went back to a certain brunette she had met in a diner during her leave. That day she had felt something special, a connection she had never felt before with someone she had just met, not even with Fitz with whom at the academy she had immediately bonded for their love of science.

For Jemma, the encounter with Skye had made her believe for the first time in something superior to science and the facts proven by it, as if some cosmic force wanted the two of them to be destined to meet, to be part of their own lives. Unfortunately, however, it had all happened so quickly that she had forgotten to find a way to stay in touch with the other girl and was now convinced that she would never see her again.

.

Skye was looking around inside this strange interrogation that she was sure was inside a plane. Officer T-1000 was dozing on his desk after their "interrogation". And even though she believed the soporific effect was true and she was actually sleeping, she wasn't entirely convinced that the truth serum story was truly legitimate and that they were just playing with her. But she didn't mind that. She liked Agent Coulson's style, and besides, she was playing her little game too. It was part of her plan that they track her down through the Mike Peterson footage and take her inside. She had spent months hacking into SHIELD in a desperate search to find answers about her parents, and all she got was a document censored by the organization that was now holding her. Skye was taking a lot of risks with this operation. Trying to infiltrate the world's largest intelligence agency could have her locked up forever, but what other choice did she have? Besides discovering her origins, she really didn't have any other goals in life, and the only time her mind thought of something different in life, she let the opportunity slip right under her nose…

"Billions of dollars of equipment at your disposal, and I beat you with a laptop that I won in a bet?"

Thinking back to the sentence that Skye had said to the two agents shortly before, it reminded her of the young scientist she met in that diner. Jemma…

For the first time she had felt a real connection with someone, the desire to have a person next to her and the possibility of building something with them. She already knew that Miles liked her and that he wanted something from their "relationship", but for her he was just a way to not feel alone and pretend that she really has someone by her side. Not that she liked using anyone like this, but she had tried to clear things up with Miles several times before, but he seemed to believe that one day things would change.

But with Jemma it had been different. A brief meeting one morning was enough to make her feel that something, that magnetism towards another person and the need to always have it in one's life. Destiny had been mocking, however, because as quickly as he had sent the English girl into her life, she was immediately taken away from her even before she had the chance to create something. And so, once she got her soul at peace, she plunged back into her mission.

Now Skye just had to find a way to get into Agent Coulson's good graces and be able to stay as long as possible…

.

Jemma had just gotten back on the bus when Agent Coulson approached her group.

"Everyone in the meeting room, we convinced our guest to tell us what she knows about our mystery hero." Coulson said.

Jemma followed her superior into the meeting room ready to work on whatever information this girl had to give, when her world suddenly froze. Because the hacker of The Rising Tide front of her was no stranger. It was the girl from the diner she had given away her previous laptop to during a bet: she was Skye. The girl she lost contact with was a hacker who had hacked her agency and was now working with them to investigate.

Immediately the same thing was happening to Skye, that while waiting for the rest of the team, the last person who expected to appear in front of her was Jemma.

Jemma who apparently worked for SHIELD. The same SHIELD she was infiltrating. This complicates everything. How did she use the agency for her own purposes and at the same time finally get the chance to meet the girl she couldn't stop thinking about? Looking at her she was immediately captured again by that innocent and joyful charm that the English girl emanated without even realizing it.

Coulson's voice roused the two girls from their quick thoughts that had gone unnoticed by the rest of those present. "Skye these are agents Fitz, Simmons and May." He then proceeded to quickly illustrate the duties of the aforementioned agents. Plus now Skye finally knew Jemma's last name.

During the quick introductions neither of the girls gave evidence that they had met before. It was as if through a single glance between them they had mutually agreed to keep this little secret, at least until they had a chance to talk privately face to face.

Everything else passed quickly enough. The team had Mike Peterson to handle and an explosion case to solve.

.

As a first mission Jemma certainly did not expect all this: a device that was a mix of all known sources of superpowers and unstable and dangerous enough to generate strong explosions, the sudden reappearance of Skye, Fitz acting strangely while he talked to her on speakerphone… and now they'll have to figure out a way to make the dendrotoxin rifle (she still refuses to call it a night-night gun) to make Mike Peterson helpless before Agent Ward is forced to kill him. And as their superior had said, that would have meant leaving a child orphaned of his father. She tried to calm Fitz by comparing the assignment to an exam, hoping that her best friend would be able to concentrate and together they would solve the problem as they always had.

But the worst part happened when Agent Coulson revealed that Peterson had taken Skye and was now standing right next to a human bomb ready to go off at any moment. Jemma was beginning to wonder if she'll ever really get the chance to have that real reunion with the young hacker, or if there will just be an eternal chance they never got to grab and try. She prayed with all her heart that everything would be fine and that no one else would lose their life today.

.

After they managed to stop Mike Peterson without killing him and handed him over to the SHIELD medical team, everyone could finally take a deep breath and recover from the last very grueling hours. They were all back on the bus and immediately divided for different purposes: Coulson and May were in his office debriefing, Ward was setting up the equipment in the armory, Fitz was in the laboratory, and Jemma was looking for their host so they could finally talk face to face.

After wandering around the bus, she finally found her outside, in front of the other girl's van after the latter had just changed into a red dress with boots. Apparently he would have accompanied Agent Coulson to deliver Ace, Peterson's son, to his aunt. Jemma took a breath and gathered all the courage to get closer and finally begin their long awaited chat.

Skye, hearing footsteps approaching, turned to find Jemma Simmons facing her. She had been waiting and at the same time dreading this meeting a lot and now the time had finally come.

"Hi…" Jemma began hesitantly.

"Hi." Skye replied in turn, without the confidence that had distinguished her during their previous meeting at the diner.

Neither of them knew where to start. Both seemed to be waiting for the other to move.

"So ... you're a The Rising Tide hacker." Jemma said first.

"And you are a SHIELD scientist." Skye retorted.

They were from two opposite worlds: one fought for freedom of information (and in secret to discover their origins) while the other was part of the most secretive and powerful intelligence agency on the planet. Yet in reality neither of them was frightened or worried by these factors. Inside they were just happy that they could meet again.

“You know, you still owe me breakfast. Last time you ran away without even giving me your number. A girl could almost think you did it on purpose. " Skye said with self-confidence again and started to look like the girl flirting with the scientist that famous morning ..

Jemma was blown away by Skye's newfound attitude. "N-no ... that morning I was in a hurry and I forgot ... I swear I didn't mean ..." She mumbled the sentences trying to say something that didn't suggest that she really had done it on purpose not to give her number to the other girl.  

Skye's little laugh stopped Jemma from her babble. "I'm making fun of you. I too forgot to leave a contact that day. " The girl sat on the edge of the open compartment of her van and motioned for the scientist to sit with her.

Jemma joined her and the two were now sitting side by side looking into each other's eyes.

“After you left and I realized we hadn't even left a phone number or email, I was convinced I wouldn't see you again. I didn't even know your surname to try to find you. " Skye confessed.

"I don't know your surname either for that." Jemma pointed out to the other girl.

"But I don't have a surname, I'm just Skye." The hacker responded in turn.

“Only Skye huh? Somehow I doubt that you've never had a surname in your entire life ”Jemma reasoned smiling.

"Yeah, only Skye," she said smiling too. Technically because of the Sisters of St. Agnes Skye she had a surname, and another name as well, but she certainly had no intention of embarrassing herself in front of Jemma.

The two girls would have gladly sat there staring at each other and talking about anything forever, but unfortunately they were joined by Coulson who was walking down the ramp of the plane.

"Skye we are ready to go, Ace has finished medical checks and said goodbye to his father" The agent in charge of the team said in their direction.

Skye looked up in his direction "Yes I'm on my way, a minute" And as the agent walked over to Lola, her vintage car, she turned her eyes back on Jemma "This time I'm the one who has to go."

The young scientist was frightened at this, convinced that she would never see Skye again, again. "Already?! But…, ”she said, unable to put into words the wish for her to stay longer.

Skye smiled at this and stood up, walking past the other girl. “Don't worry, I'm not going to disappear. Something tells me we'll meet again soon. " She concluded the statement with a wink and then walked to the red car while Jemma sat there with her mouth slightly open staring at her and with a slight blush caused by Skye's latest action.

The hacker wasn't lying when she said she wasn't going to disappear, now she had two reasons to be able to try to stay around SHIELD. Now she just had to find a way to get inside…

And as if someone were listening to her prayers, Agent Coulson had words to say to Skye once she reached him in the car. "As we go, I have an offer that maybe you might be interested in."

Perfect, it was as if destiny wanted to give her a hand. Not only had her journey to truth come to a turning point, but a new one also seems to have begun. A journey that included a beautiful English scientist named Jemma Simmons.

[marsupials-of-mars]

Milk and Lavender

I've never really had a "rarepair" but a long time ago I pretty much made this up and thought this ship was the cutest and insert it wherever I can. This fic was one of the ones recovered from my phone I lost a year ago and found recently, and I just finished it last night, so if you see a sudden boost in quality near the end, that's why.

Yan hummed cheerfully as she combed her hair. She’d been growing the top out, but not too much. Long hair got in the way. She winged her eyeliner and, after a moment of thought, drew whiskers on her cheeks. She giggled and rubbed them off. She jumped at a knock at the door.

"You almost ready? Mark says we’re almost late.” Yan opened the bathroom door, almost knocking King to the ground. He let out a spooked chatter.

"Yep I’m ready! Cmon, I’ve never been to their place!”

“It’s really fun!” King, although one of the babies of the family, was technically one of the oldest, and had been to the Septic’s house a few times. They usually hung out at the Iplier house because it was bigger, and although there were only seven Septics they were always cramped. Yan had met most of the Septics, though a few didn’t like to travel and never ended up coming over.

"Well I’m excited!” Yan smiled and squished King’s chubby cheeks she loved.

"Me too! Cmon!” King grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the room and down the stairs. Normally Yan hated people touching or dragging her but King meant no harm and he was one of her favorites, so she always allowed it.

“Yandereplier!” Mark motioned Yan to the group. All the egos were gathered in the living room. It was cramped and Yan had to step awkwardly to avoid Goop’s slime trail. She felt a body bump against her shoulder, causing her to stumble. She whipped her head up.

“Bimothy Trimmer, I will END you!” Bim stuck his tongue out and straightened his tie. Yan growled and reached back for her katana but felt nothing but empty sheathes. “Where are Aiko and Yua?!” She heard a distorted sigh.

"All weapons are confiscated until the end of the visit. The Septics have been thoroughly warned but we’re taking all precautions necessary.” Dark gave Yan a condescending look. Yan whined.

“But Anti ALWAYS brings weapons over here!”

“Anti has no decency or respect for social principle. We’re better than that. Aren’t we Yan?” Yan groaned.

“Anti’s cool DAD you’re just lame...”

"Anti is most certainly NOT cool, he’s volatile and childish. YOU are the bigger person.”

"Ugh, let’s just go. I don’t need you lecturing me In front of everyone. And COOL dad is bringing weapons anyway...” Dark looked behind him to find Wilford loading a golden handgun that seemingly appeared from nowhere. He looked up.

"What?”

"Wil, leave it.”

"Aw Cmon...”

“No guns. We’re houseguests.”

"Ugh, fine DAD.” Wil dropped the gun in the sofa.

"I’m nobody’s dad! It’s like herding cats...” Dark mumbled as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Are we all ready to go?” A ripple of nods throughout the group. "Good.” Static built around the room and the group was transported.

"Ooo!” Yan looked up at the house. It was smaller for less egos, but it was really nice. Suffice to say it was actually a house rather than a repurposed two story office building. In any case, Brighton was much less painfully hot than California which was worth the trip on its own. Yan opened her arms toward the house and breathed in the cool air. “Finally!”

"FINALLY!” The front door burst open and a spatter of green distortion tore across the lawn. Yan was barely able to tense up before she was tackled to the ground. “Bitch!”

"Slut!” Yan giggled. “Whaddaya DOIN here?!”

"It’s my house, slice n dice!” Anti sat triumphantly on Yan's stomach. She leaned up and grabbed his shoulders, flipping him off and slamming him onto his back so they lay side by side.

“UOGH! Fuck, my ribs!” Anti gasped the wind back into him. Yan giggled.

“Its MY house.” Yan looked up to see Jack leaning on the doorframe with his arms crossed. “We’ve talked about tackling guests haven’t we Anti?”

"But it’s THIS bitch! She had it comin.” Jack rolled his eyes.

“Cmon in guys. How many of you haven’t been here before?” Bing, Goop, Yan, the Jims, Eric, Derek, Randal, and Harold raised their hands. "Ooo a lot! Well we’ll make sure you have a good time. Now to my knowledge, anyone who hasn’t been here before has never met...” he thought. “Shneep or Robbie. Shneep has work and Robbie is... fragile. So say hi but try not to bother them too much okay?”

The group nodded. Yan squeaked excitedly. She looked to Anti to whisper something but noticed he was gone. She found him already glommed onto Dark to her superior’s annoyance. She didn’t call Anti a slut for her health. She sighed. It looked like she was going to have to find something else to do with herself.

She pushed her way through the door and looked around. It was a nice house, the ceilings weren’t quite as high but it was cozy, modern, and definitely had charm.

Groups were already forming. The Trick Shots (Chase, Bing, Jackie), The Better Than Everyones (Dark, Google, and a new doctor they’d found who Yan guessed was Shneep), The Innocents (King, Marvin, Eric, The Jims, Jamie), and the rest she hadn’t named to groups drifted about between. She sighed. She’d imagined something more fun. She felt like a wallflower at a high school dance.

Anti was busy hanging off Dark, sharing embarrassing stories about Shneep as the doctor tried to join the group. Everyone else sort of bored her. Sure the Innocents were adorable, and the Trick Shots we’re confident and energetic, but not really in her way. As she lay back on the couch, she thought over the introduction Jack had given. There were two egos she hadn’t met. Shneep, Who she’d now seen, and... Rolly? Robert? Remy?

She sat up. That was something to do. Meet the new one. She stood and went to find Jack. She came across him in the kitchen and pulled him away from Mark, who gave her a lecturing look, but he was lame so she didn’t care.

"Jack, you said there was someone we haven’t met? Besides Shneep?”

"Oh! Yeah, Robbie. He should be up from his nap now so you can go meet him. Though be careful, he’s, quite literally, very fragile. His room is down the hall, third to the left, take Shneep, he needs a check up anyway, and he’d feel more comfortable if someone he knew introduced you.” Yan nodded. She trotted off and pulled Shneep from his group.

"Heh?!” The doctor yanked his coat away. “What are you doing?”

"I want to meet Robbie, and Jack wanted me to bring you along cause he needs a checkup.”

Shneep checked his watch. "I guess it is about time.” He turned to Dark and Google. “I’ll be right back.” Dark nodded and Google pinged in acknowledgment. Yan dragged him off.

“Cmon! Third to the left.”

"I know where his room is, I live with him.” He pushed open the door covered with chalk stick figures and magnets. He put a palm to Yan’s chest before she could enter. "Checkup first.” Yan nodded impatiently. She slid down the doorframe and listened as Shneep entered.

"Hey, good morning my little leiche...” The doctors voice was soft and loving, a sharp contrast to how he carried himself around others. “Are you feeling good? Is anything broken?” A soft mumbling that Yan could barely hear responded.

"Good!” She could hear a smile in Shneep’s voice. “Can we feel your beats? Deep breath.” A pause. “Hmm... a little slow. Shake it out!” A rustle as Robbie shook around. “Good! One more deep breath... much better! Now, the Iplier’s are over and someone wants to meet you. Is that okay? Do you feel good and strong? Good! She’s very excited to see you.” A rustle as he got up from the bed.

"Go ahead, his vitals are good. Just be careful.” Shneep patted Yans shoulder and took her place outside the door. She peered around the door. And gasped. He was stunning.

His skin was a milky lavender, pale and delicate looking, almost translucent. His glazed eyes reminded her of full moons on a cloudy night, and the way he held himself, passively watching but showing no reaction, it conveyed just the kind of mystery she loved in a man. He looked her way, only barely, turning his head a mere 45 degrees. Her breath caught in her throat, she could barely breath, but she instantly regretted stopping. The air in the room was fragrant with the scent of death, corpse, one of her favorite natural perfumes, and she needed to breathe to experience it. She filled her lungs slowly before approaching her soulmate.

"H-hello..." She whispered, afraid to break him from what she assumed was a constant state of meditation. He must be so wise. His head turned further, finally oriented so he was fully facing her. It was difficult to tell where his eyes pointed. They were clouded over, lenses so opaque it was difficult to tell between iris and sclera, but Yan caught the movement. They rolled back slowly, locking with hers.

"Hello." His voice was soft, and he spoke deliberately, like forming the word was difficult. But Yan knew better. Yan could tell it was because he was a man of few words. He could convey what he needed without them. They got in the way of his incredible intellect.

"I was excited to meet you. This is my first time coming here, and I dont get along with many of these people..."

Robbie blinked, one eye after the other. A moment passed as he processed the sentence. "Understand that people... scary. Sometimes. Move fast, yell."

"Is that why you stay in your room?"

Robbie nodded, slowly and steadily. "Zombie is... fragile. Hen and Jack... don't want broken Robbie. Want to play... but scary. Too fast."

Yan's heart was melting more by the second.

"The world isn't fit for someone who knows better. You're a philosopher, I can tell. You like to think about big questions, you don't fit in with all the hustle and bustle of those ruffians. I could learn from you."

"Robbie... philosopher? You... want to... learn?"

Yan gasped at the offer. "Would you really teach me?"

Robbie didn't speak for a minute. Then two minutes. Yan didn't dare speak, for fear of interrupting his process. Her patience was rewarded. Her new senpai offered her the most beautiful gift she'd ever laid eyes on.

He smiled at her. The corners of his mouth gradually pulled up into a wide, bright smile. He had adorable apple cheeks that wrinkled the greyed bags of his eyes. "Yes... Robbie teach."

Yan squealed and grabbed Robbies hand between hers. She squeezed and shimmied her shoulders in excitement.

In a split second, to her horror, she heard a loud snap. It was followed by a fleshy plop as she let go.

She looked down at her hands and her breath left her. A lavender finger, wriggling, a knuckle bone protruding from the end. The movement came to a halt and the phalange lay limp. She looked up to her senpai, her face twisted with mortification and guilt.

"I'm so sorry! I got excited, I can sew, I can even embroider, I can put it back on and make it look even better than before-"

She stopped when a four-fingered hand softly brushed hers. He closed her fingers around the severed digit. She looked up.

He looked startled, but not particularly bothered.

"Do not... scream. Please. But... friend I teach. Keep. Present. Robbie present."

Yan's eyes widened in astonishment. She clutched the finger to her chest.

"You mean it?" Robie nodded. Yan looked down into her gingerly cupped hands. "Robbie present..." She breathed his words like they were sacred.

"YAN! Where are you you trainwreck? I'm bored!"

Yan looked up. Anti must have given up trying to seduce her boss. But she didn't want to leave, not when she was having such a beautiful moment.

"Go. Play." Robbie smiled. "Anti play scary. You like."

"No, I don't like to play scary, I want to stay with you and be less scary!"

"No. You play scary. Fun. You have fun. I stay, teach later. Scary not bad play."

"But I thought that was the point of teaching me, to teach me to be more calm and wise like you!"

"No. Calm, philosopher, not without play. You not fragile, zombie fragile. Go play scary."

Yan smiled. "You're so smart... I like being with you. I hope you want to see me again...?" She held her breath. She hoped it went as well as she thought it did. She had a tendency to drive love away some way or another.

"Yes, again. Go. But... name?"

"Oh, I never told you! How rude! I'm Yan."

"Yan. Nice name. Goodbye."

Yan stood, staring a moment before turning to leave. She shut the door gently behind her.

"THERE you are! C'mon, I planted some fake coke in Eric's back pocket, I want to see his reaction when he finds it!" Anti reached to grab Yans hand, but Yan jerked away. That hand held her gift. Anti squinted and looked over. "Oh fuck, is that Rob's finger?"

"It was a gift!"

Anti snorted. "You're a sick bitch, you know that?" And without another word, he dragged her out into the main area. Yan tucked the finger in her bra for safekeeping. As she watched Eric lose his shit over some cocaine, she couldn't help but hear two words repeating in her head, over and over.

"Yes, again."

[elceeu2morrow]

NEW DIRECTION Louis Tomlinson on why he’s not ready to make up with Zayn Malik and how fatherhood made him grow-up fast

Beth Neil  2 Feb 2020, 0:01  Updated: 2 Feb 2020, 3:06

Back then he didn’t appear to be a natural frontman. He wasn’t one to hog the spotlight, nor did he seem remotely interested in competing with the magnetism of Harry or the vocal range of Zayn.

“There were times I struggled to find my place in the band,” Louis admits today.

But it’s often the quiet ones you’ve got to look out for.

Behind the scenes he was very much centre stage: Louis was the mouthpiece, constantly fighting the boys’ corner and acting as chief negotiator between band and management.

“Being from Doncaster,” he says, “I’ve never had a problem with telling anyone ‘no’.”

On top of this (and perhaps most significantly), in the six years that the band were together after finishing third on The X Factor in 2010, Louis diligently racked up more songwriting credits than any of the others, hinting that a hard-working and ambitious young artist lurked beneath the surface.

Indeed, while he might be the last of the band to release a solo album (four years after they announced their hiatus, breaking several million hearts in the process), the result suggests that Louis, having held his nerve and bided his time, might just prove to be the dark horse.

“There was a while when I was worried I was getting left behind – some of the boys are on to their second album now,” he says, taking a draw onthe first of several cigarettes. “At times, I’ve been swimming against the tide, working out who I am. I was trying to find a way back into the industry, thinking of it mathematically rather than going off feeling and emotion.”

He’s referring to collaborations with Bebe Rexha and Steve Aoki in 2016 and 2017 respectively, which, although successful, weren’t where his heart lay. With Kill My Mind – the exhilarating ’90s-inspired opening track of the album Walls – he sets his stall out with a clear departure from anything he’s done before.

Walls is about regret, reflection and ultimately, hope, and feels like Louis, who sings in his still-broad Doncaster accent, has finally found his voice.

“I’ve always wanted to be autobiographical and honest. And in the last six months the songs I’ve written and recorded are of a better standard because there’s an honesty there,” he says.

Honesty certainly characterises the album, sometimes devastatingly so. There’s no escaping the fact that Louis, 28, has faced unimaginable pain over the last few years.

First losing his mum Johannah Deakin, known as Jay, in December 2016 to leukaemia, and then his sister Félicité, who died last year aged 18 following an accidental drug overdose.

The lyrics to Two Of Us, written about his mum, include intimate details about Louis’ experience with grief.

“It wasn’t until after I’d written it that I realised how much vulnerability I’d put in there,” he says. “When I first performed it… I had fans coming up to me in tears telling me their stories, and that’s not something I’ve ever had before. And to do it on that level about something so delicate… It was really cool to take something so dark and make people feel like that.

“I had to get a song like that off my chest. It was difficult writing about things that felt trivial compared to what was going on in my life. There was, I think, a necessity to write that song before I could move on creatively.”

Understandably, Louis won’t talk specifically about Félicité. But when asked about how grief has shaped him both as a man and an artist, he pays tribute to Jay.

“I think it’s a credit to how my mum brought me up that I have a resilience,” he says. “There’s nothing I want less than to have people feel sorry for me, so having that mentality has helped me through the hardest of times.

"I’ve also felt a real support system through my fans. I’d always felt it on a lower level, but when it’s something so impactful and life-defining, I really did feel it from them.”

Days after Jay’s death, Louis appeared live on The X Factor to perform Just Hold On with Aoki.

He was clearly in pieces and it was hard enough just watching, but somehow he held it together, presumably thanks again to that resilience.

“Sometimes it’s fight or flight,” Louis explains. “And the way I was brought up and because of where I’m from, I only see one option in that situation. I also wanted to put myself second and do it for my mum.

"That moment was bigger than me and it was actually incredibly liberating. It used every bit of strength and power and I look back on that performance as one of the proudest moments of my career.”

He says he tends not to suppress emotion and is able to share his darkest points with those he’s closest to.

But as the eldest of Jay’s seven children (five girls and two boys), he also feels a huge weight of responsibility towards his younger siblings and hasn’t had any professional therapy himself.

“No, no, nothing like that. That might be down to a bit of Northern pride, but I have a lot of responsibility on my shoulders and that drives me. I’ve got siblings who look up to me and I’ve got my grandparents as well. So all those things keep my head screwed on.

“My mum had a massive influence on me and I lived with a lot of sisters in the house, so I do find it easier to speak about my emotions. But I’m also from Doncaster, where to be a guy is to be tough and traditional and I feel like [there are] times where pride kicks in and I just say I’m all right.

"I’m lucky that I’ve got good people around me who I can trust and who I can be completely vulnerable with and say how I feel. Nine times out of 10, I don’t bottle things up. I wear my heart on my sleeve.”

[below the cut is the rest of the unedited article - including Eleanor, Freddie, 1D]

His model, blogger and politics graduate girlfriend Eleanor Calder, 27, who Louis first got together with back in 2010 during the last week of The X Factor (“before it got manic”) has been a crucial part of the stability he’s needed through such sadness.

“She’s been amazing. With any monumental time in your life you need people who understand and love you. She makes my life easier.”

In 2015 they split up for nearly two years during which time Louis became a dad to Freddie, now four, following a brief fling with LA stylist Briana Jungwirth.

The track Too Young is almost an apology to Eleanor for that period (“I’m sorry I hurt you, darling… I cut you off cos I didn’t know no better”), but Louis says the time apart taught him some tough lessons and has made them stronger.

“I think we both agree that we needed [that break]. I was too immature for a relationship of that seriousness. But I had to learn that and be an idiot first.

“A lot of young men won’t understand until they have hindsight. The responsibility of meeting someone you could spend the rest of your life with at 18 is too much for most immature men. I was very immature at that → age and didn’t understand the feelings or importance.”

He and Eleanor guard their privacy ferociously and very deliberately haven’t made themselves a public couple. They don’t go to places where they’ll get papped or post pictures of each other on social media.

“Me and Eleanor have been together ages and I don’t have a lot of private photos for myself,” he says. “Even on a night out there’ll be some f**ker taking my picture and it goes everywhere.

"So those moments to ourselves are special. It’s the same way I look at Freddie. Do I wanna show him off and tell the world how amazing he is? Yes, of course I do! But I know he’s amazing and he knows that and that’s what matters.”

He dotes on Freddie (“I cherish my time with my boy”) but admits the unplanned pregnancy was a wake-up call.

“Yeah, it was unexpected and I had to grow up very quickly. It was another one of them moments – being faced with the reality of a situation and having to step up. It was a very maturing time in my life.

“And, again, I’ve kind of got between two headspaces. I’m the responsible dad and brother some days and other days I’m still the reckless idiot chav I used to be. I’m still trying to work out a happy medium.”

Absolutely no one could have predicted the global phenomenon that 1D became, least of all Louis, Liam, Zayn, Niall and Harry themselves.

They sold 20 million albums worldwide, earning over £40million each, but the pressures of fame were, at times, intolerable. Louis says they were only able to keep their heads screwed on because they had each other.

“You can never be prepared for that. It was such a head f**k. But we grounded each other so the minute one of us acted like a d**khead one of the others would say: ‘Stop being a d**khead’. I see people in this job surrounding themselves with superiority and they lose the concept of the real world.”

He remembers doing a shoot with the band for Pepsi over in the States with American footballer Drew Brees.

“This guy was like a god and we were insignificant when he was around, which we understood. But I’ve never seen anything like it. Every sentence that came out of his mouth he’d have an audience of hangers-on in hysterics.

"These people were so far up his arse and he didn’t have one good joke. He had no banter! I still hang around with my boys from Doncaster and I hear real stories all the time, which helps me understand the world that unfortunately I don’t get to see. Having empathy with people and a connection with the world is imperative for any songwriter.”

Harry Styles recently said that he never touched drugs during his time in the band (although he’s made up for that since), because he didn’t want to “mess it up”. Louis smiles as he confides that he can’t say the same.

“All I’ll say is that I did my fair share and enjoyed my time in the band. It’s right what Harry said and it was smart of him, but I definitely had a lot of fun in the band. I was always aware of how amazing the opportunity was, but also enjoying the moment for what it was. I lived like anyone else my age – the difference was that I was in One Direction.”

He’s in touch with Harry, Niall and Liam “sporadically” (we’ll come to Zayn shortly), but they’re all on very different paths for now.

“If we all went to a pub tomorrow it’d be like we’d never left. The enormity of what happened in One Direction creates a massive bond and we’ll always have that.

"There have been times when we’ve done each other’s heads in. There might be something I say in an interview that bugs Liam or vice versa, but we all know what each other is like and we can call each other up and say sorry for being a d**k. We’re like brothers.”

But that’s not necessarily the case with Zayn, who quit in 2015 and with whom Louis has had a turbulent relationship since. He was hurt when Zayn was the only one not to turn up at the X Factor studio to support him through his performance after Jay’s death, despite promising to be there.

Then there’s Zayn’s apparent repeated digs. In one interview he branded 1D’s music “generic as f**k”. There’s a difference between making a break from the past and dismissing it completely, and it’s a line Zayn perhaps hasn’t always managed to walk.

“Hmm,” agrees Louis, cautiously. “Other than maybe Niall, there is no one who is prouder of the band and the songs we created than me. But while what I did with One Direction is relevant, it doesn’t define who I am and I don’t struggle to make that dissociation.”

Does he think some of what Zayn has said has been disrespectful?

“Yeah, I do. But I can understand it. We have a lot of situations where we’re sat in interviews and if you’re in a certain mood you might run your mouth. The older you get the more you can tell if these things actually carry any malice or if they’re just a prod in the back. That’s life, innit? Sometimes people chat s**t and that’s the reality.”

He’s not ruling out resolving their differences in the future, but there’s no olive branch on the horizon.

“No, but I’ve not actively tried. We’ve all got a lot on our plates and there might be a day where I wake up and think: ‘OK, I want to right that wrong’, but not yet.”

After being in his company for a while, it’s not hard to see why Louis was 1D’s driving force backstage. He’s thoughtful, articulate, open and self-aware, but there’s a steeliness to him and the requisite pop-star swagger, which doesn’t seem to spill over into arrogance.

He’s based in LA these days, to stay close to Freddie, but “Donny” will always be home. He says comparing the two places is “literally chalk and cheese” and it’s taken him time to “come round” to living in the States.

“It’s taken a while to get used to spending so much time there. I feel like I’m very British at heart.”

And that is reflected in his music, which is heavily influenced by the Arctic Monkeys, The Smiths and Oasis. In fact, the title track and latest single Walls sounds so similar to Oasis B-side and fans’ favourite Acquiesce that Louis’ manager flagged it as a potential issue.

“These kinds of things happen. There are only so many melodies you can write and if you listen to a band all the time like I do with Oasis…”

Anyway, says Louis. He had to make a choice.

“I was ready to risk it, but everyone said we should get in touch with Noel [Gallagher] so we did. Often the industry, and especially Noel’s world, can be a bit snobby and say: ‘F**k you you’re not using this song’. But he was really cool about it, signed it off no problem and although I’m sure he’s not happy about this, I f**king am, I’ve got a writing credit from Noel Gallagher on my album. That is some sick s**t so I’m buzzing.”

Is he nervous about going it alone? “I think I’ve got a good record so I’m confident. But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t little bit nervous – there’s three and half years work gone into it so there’s a level of anticipation.”

The most overwhelming emotion though, is relief.

“Because it’s taken such a long time. I’m excited to go on to the next phase of my career.”

Louis Tomlinson’s new album Walls is out now.

[scarlettswxtch]

Darkest Side of Me | 2

Characters: Bucky x Reader / Steve x Reader

Summary: You’re recruited as a new Avenger with powers unlike any other. With a tragic past blurred from birth, who will be at your side when you realise who you truly are?

Word count: 2,400

A/N: I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THE ORIGINAL POST. Lol. So sorry to anyone who wondered what happened but please let me know if you enjoy the Bucky and Steve thing or if you’d prefer a Bucky x Reader only fic. I apologise for any spelling mistakes in advance.

On another note, I’m terrible at summaries 😬. It’s changed from my first one if you remember it, just felt like it didn’t describe it well enough. Hope you guys enjoy anyway!! (P.S. I’m SUPER sorry for the late posting I’ve been so busy). Message me if you’d like to be on the tag list :)

Warnings: This fanfiction is M Rated, and the men (really only Steve and Bucky) will all be dominant guys, if you’re into that sorta thing. So..beware cause some chapters may be smutty ;)

DARKEST SIDE OF ME

PART 1

You woke as the sun rises like a canopy of gold, bright amid the blue, bidding the stars to take their nightly rest. As darkness surrenders, every colour changes from tinges of charcoal to a vibrancy.

 A third cup of coffee was now nestled perfectly into your hands as you stood outside the compound’s kitchen balcony. The avenger’s facility was truly impeccable with its finely trimmed grass fields and blue coastal views. When you had returned from your encounter with Bucky, you sat in bed restlessly, wondering what was so magnetic about him. After millennia of being alive, encountering countless beings, human and alien alike, none of them had made you feel such a strong state of wonder as that damned soldier. There was something about him - his gaze, how it so daringly held yours, the way his presence could make your heart skip, mind wonder. It was ridiculous. He was a stranger you had met merely 24 hours ago. Yet, it was intriguing, made you want to know more. It was seldom someone made you feel this way and you wondered what the fates were trying to tell you.

 You closed your eyes to the lullaby of the ocean, breathing in its poignant salty breath, sighing in silent content. Quiet mornings were your most cherished part of the day.

 “Mornin’.” You hear behind you. Startled, you whirl around and almost spill your coffee everywhere. A splash of it lands on the floor and thankfully not on you. You’d think a goddess would have a little more grace than this, you think to yourself and scowl at the now brown spot on an otherwise perfectly pristine floor.

 Your eyes turn to meet a lovely pair of wonderfully azure orbs now shining with amusement. You gather yourself, your scowl deepening...which apparently only adds to his amusement because he chuckles.

 “Good morning, Captain.” You say, unimpressed with his humour. Inner you squealed at his sudden presence. Steve Rodgers was like a GQ model with all the charm in the world.

 He sauntered over to your side, keeping a friendly, and (unfortunately) professional distance. “How you settling in?” He says, his eyes level to yours.

 You didn’t miss his loose grey t-shirt, which quite frankly did nothing to hide his very obvious god-like build. The muscles of his biceps flexed with every slight movement and damn if you didn’t want to reach out and take your time tracing each ridge with your fingertips. Maybe even your tongue. You wouldn’t be opposed to either. Jesus Christ this guy was hot.

 Your eyes snapped to his. If he noticed you checking him out, he gratefully didn’t show it. Although, you assumed he was used to swooning women. “Fine,” you said, your voice holding a hint of hoarseness that he didn’t miss. “Might take a little getting used to, but everyone seems great” you finished, with a smile.

 Steve nodded and gave you a smile of his own. “Yeah it can be tough, first coupla days”.

 “The whole welcome committee made me feel more at ease”

 “Yeah, you stick around long enough they’ll start to feel like family” he said sympathetically, correctly guessing family was a sore spot for you.

 Your eyes turned to him, unsurprised “You read my file.”

 “Always do my homework on new recruits” he explained “Fury runs files through us before approval...it’s not often someone gets recommended for the team. When Fury found out about you, and what you could do, he wanted you on board ASAP. We didn’t protest.”

 You raised a brow “So I got the Tony and Cap stamp of approval? I’m flattered”

 He grins “No doubt your file is quite impressive, the team could definitely use someone like you on our side. Thor didn’t seem thrilled with the idea the idea, though. He protested to say the least.”

 You chuckled, but there was nothing but bitterness behind it “Yes. I can imagine” He raised a brow and you looked away from him in memory. It didn’t go unnoticed that he wasn’t part of your welcome party last night. Odin disliked you for reasons unbeknownst - Thor and you were the best of friends, once upon a time. He took pity on you, swearing to convince his father to allow you refuge on Asgard. Days later, he returned with a wary look on his face, claiming to know ‘who you really are’. You never saw him again.

“Long story,” You told Steve.

His hand gave your shoulder a gentle squeeze and his next words were said like velvet, “If you ever need to talk, I have all the time in the world. Literally,” you appreciated Steve, he was like a beacon of safety and warmth. The kinda guy that would take your deepest, darkest secrets to the grave because he promised.

You smiled at him warmly. It was unlikely you’d take him up on that, but you were grateful for his sincerity. “I’ll keep that in mind” He simply nods in response.

Moments later, he sighs loudly before downing all his coffee, placing the cup on the table beside him and turning to you with a mischievous look in his eyes. “Wanna spar?” He asks, both hands on hips and lips tipped up in challenge. You raise a surprised eyebrow and he grins “What? Scared you’ll lose?”

 You chuckle, appreciating the change of topic. “I see you didn’t do all your homework on me, Captain” you say, placing your unfinished coffee on the table. You levelled his challenging gaze with your own, “Both know I could beat you with my eyes closed” you retort, teasingly, and he smiles with wonderful curiosity.

 “I did read your file. Thoroughly” he retorts, stepping closer to you. You suddenly felt very small against his ridiculously tall frame. “You’re enhanced. Healing powers, fast reflexes, better than any Soviet-trained assassin according to SHIELD” he stopped with pointed humour “although I’m sure Bucky and Natasha will contest that”, that made you scoff. “Besides, new recruits need training”

 “I’m impressed. Although I think you’ll find your time as a popsicle has nothing on my literal thousand-year-old experience.” You said with a grin

 “Oh, so that’s how we’re playing it?” He asked with a hearty laugh and right then you were certain no galaxy in the world could show you anything more pleasant.

 “Hey, you started it Cap, I’m known for my retribution”

 “I’m sure you’ll go easy on me” he adds.

 You gave him a smirk “No promises”

 ~~~

 “You okay down there, Cap?” You say, your voice trembling with humour.

 Steve Rodgers looks up at you from the hard floor of the training room. Salty droplets flow down his face like soft summer rain, dripping onto the concrete as he sits to regain his breath.

 He lets out a huffed breath and repeats your earlier words “I’m impressed”

 You tuck a piece of hair behind your ear, eyes shining with obvious pride. You had just taken down the world’s favourite golden boy with nothing but a few fight moves. Needless to say, Cap had some good moves of his own and had almost got you down a few times. Then again, you are of a completely superior alien race, so you’d give him some credit.

 “Well, not like Fury to employ any average gal- “you began, before a strong hand wrapped around your ankle and you were suddenly falling down, moments away from head butting the floor before strong hands wrapped around your waist, guiding you to land quite snug on Steve’s lap.

 He gave you an amused look “You were saying?” Suddenly, you were very aware of his warm hands against your waist and you couldn’t think of a better feeling.

 Actually...maybe you could...because right now your hands were resting on his chest and holy hell does it feel nice. All you wanted to do was rip off his shirt and set it ablaze. In fact, you wanted to march to his room and set all of his shirts ablaze. It would be a blessing to all humankind to watch Steve Rodgers walk around shirtless, all the time...24/7...would definitely add years onto someone’s life. Especially if they had their hands on him, just like this.

 He squeezes you as if you gain your attention, his eyes twinkling with amusement because he had very obviously caught you checking out his chest. You blinked, sure enough your cheeks were now stained pink. Thank god mind reading wasn’t on his resume.

 You cleared your throat “You distracted me, that’s cheating. Besides, I’m not using any of my abilities on you. Fair game and everything” you finish with a smirk.

 “Thought you weren’t going easy on me?” He said teasingly.

 “You could’ve let me fall and you didn’t.”

 He grins “Yeah, I had a good reason”.

 You raised a brow “And what would that be?”

 You feel his hands softly squeeze your bare waist and your breath hitches. “Didn’t wanna ruin that pretty face of yours, darlin’” he says, and inner you sighs in upmost content. Well...damn. Safe to say Captain America could charm anyone’s pants off. You were just happy this time they were yours. His hands move lower, thumb now drawing circles against your back and you feel your mind wonder to places it shouldn’t. Gosh his eyes are nice, and you’d be damned if his face wasn’t even more beautiful up close. You were dazed, and if you weren’t mistaken, so was he because his eyes glazed over with a very familiar look of lust. Perhaps if you just leaned a little clo-

 “Well don’t you two look cosy” you hear from the doorway and your head whips around to meet an icy cold stare. Bucky Barnes. What terrible timing.

 You promptly lift yourself off Steve, almost giving yourself whiplash, hand shooting out to hold the bars of the ring. You clear your throat. “We were just sparring” you explain, and frown to yourself. Why did you feel the urge to justify yourself to this man?

 He lifted an eyebrow “If that’s how you spar, doll, you’ll have the whole house lining up for a piece of that”

 Your eyes narrow. Did he just -. Your mouth opens, but before you can reply he cuts you off: “Stark wants us at the conference room in 5. So, when you two love-birds are done ‘sparring’” he says, pointedly air-quoting the last word and your eyes narrow further “we’ll be waiting for you”. And with that, he turns on his heel and leaves.

 You turned to Steve and your look of disbelief must’ve been evident on your face because he chuckles as he lifts himself off the floor. “Don’t mind him, he’s always grumpy.” He walks out of the ring, suddenly turning to you all Captain America like as if he didn’t just have you on his lap 2 minutes ago. “Get cleaned up”, he throws a towel at you “I’ll see you in the conference room in 3” and with that, he leaves, and you’re left wondering if all super soldiers are this perplexing.

 ~~~

 The conference room was nice to say the least. Tony Stark did nothing half-way. You were watching him with all his authority and confidence, but your thoughts were a million miles away. Cap sat at the head of the table and you could see his lips form words your mind wasn’t quite registering. Probably not a great idea considering this was your first mission debriefing. Your thoughts were in fact on the man opposite you. His metal hand tapping restlessly on the table, you could tell he was paying as much attention as you were. You tilted your head in silent wonder and observed him with careful consideration. If the hard line on his lips and slight frown were anything to go by, something was bothering him, and you could tell.

 He doesn’t look any less gorgeous when he’s annoyed, by the way. If anything, it added to the masculinity of his features; hard jaw clenching deliciously, eyes miraculously darker, that perpetual murderous look in his face magnetised by a million. Jesus Christ you felt like a teenager. Why are these stupid, gorgeous super soldiers taking up all your damned thoughts?

 You didn’t know what it was about Steve either. His in-your-face all-star golden boy beauty was fucking gut wrenching. He was sweet, ever-so welcoming, he joked, had this calm, comforting aura that made you feel warm and lovely. Like you knew him all your life - as if he were your long-lost best friend your soul wanted to hold onto with every ounce of her being. Your eyes flickered to him and you watched as his mouth made yet more unheard words. Your interaction earlier had been unprecedented. Sure, you were attracted to him, but who wasn’t? Steve Rodgers is Adonis embodied and every woman knew it. He was blinding and warm like the sun.

 And Bucky...he was different. The complete paradox of Steve. Bloody beautiful in all the rough ways. There was nothing in-your-face about him, no. He was mysterious, extraordinarily so. There was nothing light about him - just stormy, agonising beauty. You could tell he was that intense guy. The kind women would look at and want just because he looked dangerous. Just because they knew he’d give them the ride of their lives and probably break their heart on the way, but it didn’t matter cause that was part of the adventure. The guy that would wrap his hand around your throat and squeeze until you were on your knees, clawing for breath while telling him how every inch of you belonged to him. Then he’d fuck you bloody just to prove it.

You watched him with a calculated gaze. You had only brief interactions with him but every one of them felt like eternity between you and those icy blue whirlpools of his. There was much more to the Winter Solider than his cold, broody exterior and you wanted to dive deep inside that ocean of his mind and uncover them.

 His eyes turned to you then. He had obviously felt you staring. He raised an annoyed brow in question, and you said nothing, just looked away in silent consideration.

 Natasha poked your thigh from beside you and you turned to her, her green eyes held a mischievous glint as her eyes flickered to Steve, then Bucky, and then you in silent questioning. You rolled your eyes; she had clearly sensed your distraction and your very obvious staring at the two soldiers probably confirmed whatever thoughts she was having. Damn Widow always noticed everything. She smirked, mouthing “Later” and her eyes promised an incoming, post-brief interrogation. Metal note to nicely ask Natasha to debrief you on the debriefing too.

[gffa]

Name ten favourite characters from ten different things (books, tv, film, etc.) then tag ten people

Tagged by @thewillowbends.  These lists are always hard, but that’s kind of the fun of them!  And that’s why we cheat and sometimes have lots of ties because no you can’t make me choose. 1.  Thor from Marvel’s Cinematic Universe - I am a sucker for a character who has their shit together but can still be human and face ridiculously traumatic experiences and come through them whole because they had a rock solid foundation to begin with.  From being thrown out of Asgard, made mortal, and taking that chance to suck it up and make himself better that he did that himself to the loss of pretty much his entire family and most of his people and his sense of purpose, the thing I love about Thor is that he keeps getting back up.  That kind of fortitude is even more appealing that the ridiculously hot lightning powers. 2.  Tsukino Usagi from Sailor Moon - I always loved her in the ‘90s anime, but reading the manga skyrocketted her into this special untouchable place in my heart.  The beginning of her journey is a girl who is so fragile that she would kill herself if she didn’t have the emotional support around her, who had to take step after step forward to find her inner strength, who wasn’t weak or terrible for her fragility, but instead her story was worth telling for it, that the point she started out as was just as valuable as the place she ended up, where she could be the one to stand up to save her friends and get them back herself, that journey was worth telling.  I LOVE HER TO THE ENDS OF THE EARTH. 3.  Thranduil and Maedhros from Tolkien’s Legendarium - It was really hard to choose, because I love a lot of the characters (and I feel badly leaving Thingol and Maglor off the list and I will fight a bitch for Galadriel and Elrond and listen Glorfindel is pure joy and also the internet is too mean to Elwing and I kind of want alllll the Melkor and Manwe fic because sobs they’re brothers shut up you can’t make me not have feelings about that, but also trashbag Melkor/Sauron and--) but those are the two I usually wind up wanting to know their pov in a fic I’m reading or have them around when shit’s going down because I want to see what they’ll do or I just miss them the most when they’re not there. 4.  Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi from Star Wars - If you asked me to pick between them, I don’t know that I could.  Yeah, sure, I love Obi-Wan ridiculously, but if you give me five minutes, I’m pretty much always going to drift back to talking about Anakin and his issues instead.  I’m not sure I can even boil them down into a nutshell about why I like them so much, they’re the kind of characters that I love so intensely and with such big, sweeping thoughts, that I’d have to write a whole essay.  But my best attempt:  Anakin’s being both dumbass and genius at the same time, being charming and magnetic while also being a bag of garbage at the same time, who had such good in him but was also an absolute monster, who I desperately want to be happy, but I also struggle to forgive him sometimes and that’s saying a lot for a fictional character, he’s brilliant enough to truly carry an entire Saga about him.  And Obi-Wan is the bedrock of all goodness in that galaxy, he could be obnoxious at times and he didn’t always see Anakin clearly, but he always cared and he remained good and hopeful, he continued to serve the galaxy, no matter what it threw at him, and even forgave Anakin in the end, because he always rose above.  That’s it, that’s my shit right there. 5.  Inoue Orihime from Bleach - ORIHIME WAS MY GIRL FROM THE VERY BEGINNING, her unwavering kindness and care, her desire to be soft in a world (and, frankly, fandom) that wanted her to be hard and to fight everything, when she didn’t want to fight, she wanted to heal, she wanted to have fun and be weird, she wanted everyone to be happy, all of that made me love her.  Her loopiness is an absolute delight, but what I loved so much about her is that Orihime had the powers/abilities to be quite possibly the most OG of the entire cast, she could reject reality itself, and she never once wanted to use it to beat anyone up or to destroy anything, she wanted to make friends with her fairies and she wanted to help people.  That girl refused to let the world make her anything less than kind and caring and sweet.  She was THE BEST. 6.  Hara Akiha and Umeda Hokuto from Hanazakari no Kimitachi e/Hana-Kimi - Sometimes we all fall in love with those minor characters and they just fucking consume us.  A lot of it came from that they were both hot, they were both hilarious, and so they were just really fun, but what really got me was that I genuinely loved everything Nakajo did with Umeda’s character.  There weren’t a lot of gay characters in shoujo manga that weren’t complete comedic relief, where their sexuality was the joke.  Yes, Umeda was often a humorous character (all of the cast was) but he firmly was completely uninterested in high school kids, he liked adult men, and his advice to Mizuki may have been crabby as hell, but it was genuine and good.  His sexuality wasn’t the punchline of his character.  Then there was Akiha, who was also comedic, but his bisexuality (another rare thing to find in manga!) had nothing to do with the humor of his character, all of it was in the way he chased after Umeda.  He was a genuine suitor (and, reading the post-manga character interviews, apparently they got together, OMG MY HEART) and the kiss they shared was treated just as seriously as any straight kiss would have been.  That meant a lot to me, even though I’d have loved the characters just because they were so interesting and Umeda’s struggle to get over the guy who never cared for him and to let himself be vulnerable with someone that he could actually care about, was so great. 7.  Yuki Eiri from Gravitation - I can’t begrudge anyone for giving this show a lot of shit (and I definitely am going with anime!Yuki here, rather than manga!Yuki) or dismissing it as being god-awful, because it probably was pretty cringeworthy.  But Yuki got under my skin because he was one of the first characters I resonated with where his depression was real and it was ugly.  He could be cruel to people around him, he pushed them away, not just half-heartedly, but genuinely, and he couldn’t stand being vulnerable, because it touched on all the terrible places that had been damaged by what Kitazawa had done to him.  And he couldn’t just be magically fixed by Tohma’s devotion or Shuuichi’s unwavering amounts of love poured into him.  He couldn’t just be fixed with a hug or one good crying session.  He was damaged and it was going to be a hell of a long hike back up to anything even a little bit normal.  Especially back at that time, I felt like depression and trauma were never given any real weight, then along comes this ridiculous BL series that just refused to make Yuki anything less that genuinely damaged and it hit all these places in wee me that was struggling through my own depression that couldn’t just be cured with some hugs and people telling me they loved me.

8.  Hashiba Touma from Yoroiden Samurai Troopers - I’m not sure I could even say why this character got under my skin the way he did, other than that there was definitely a group of us who were SUPER into the show and it was fun to make a playground for ourselves, and Touma just really got to me.  The brilliant character who didn’t always know how to relate to others, but who cared very deeply about them, who gravitated to those who were better at social interaction than he was, who were better able to connect to people than he was, that he found this group where he really belonged, that just really touched wee me’s heart. 9.  Tendou Souji from Kamen Rider Kabuto - THIS OBNOXIOUS HOT MESS I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.  It was hard not to put Kagami on the list as well, because so much of what I love about Tendou is illustrated through his relationship with Kagami (whom I also love on his own), but I think I keep coming back to that I love his issues the most.  He’s the best at everything and so it puts distance between him and everyone else, all the more so because he’s so obnoxious about it and doesn’t slow down for anyone else to catch up, but the thing is that there’s a very caring heart underneath all that.  He loves his sisters, he loves Kagami, he even kind of tolerates the rest of their weird gang, and trying to find that difficult line of his superiority over the others versus that he wants them to catch up to him in his own way, all while being the most condescending dick ever, is absolute joy. 10.  Relena Darlian from Gundam Wing - I had a difficult path to liking Relena, because so much of fandom boiled her down to either being a creepy stalker who got in the way of Heero/Duo or they only ever wrote her in romantic pairing stuff with Heero, neither of which really encouraged me to like her.  But, as time went on and I rewatched the series a couple of times, I realized there’s so much more to her.  She’s a character who has to walk an impossible line between both of the legacies that weigh on her, the birth family that she never knew but maybe she could help bring peace to the world by taking up that name, by trying to bring back the Sanq Kingdom that promoted absolute pacifism and peace.  Yet, ultimately, for all that her relationship with Zechs is really important and she was the heir to that kingdom, she chose to be Relena Darlian.  She choose to try to bring peace to the world by standing up on her own as a politician, not a figurehead queen of the world.  The struggle to figure that out, who she wants to be and how she wants to achieve it, to go from a sheltered young girl at the start of the series to someone who has seen how terrible war is, is far more interesting than either of those first options for me! And I’ll tag @forcearama (and if I couldn’t put Obi-Wan as all ten entries, neither can you!) @belldreams @subskywalker @cacchieressa @bpdanakins @glompcat @writegowrite @fireflyfish @evaceratops @amarielah and anyone else who wants to do it that I’m not sure I feel quite like I’m able to try peer pressuring you into it.  ♥  I love seeing these from anyone who wants to do them, I’m just never sure if I’m allowed to go HEY YOU DO THIS THING.  orz

[ty-talks-comics]

Best of Marvel: Week of July 24th, 2019

Best of this Week: House of X #1 - Jonathan Hickman, Pepe Larraz, Marte Gracia and Clayton Cowles

“You have new Gods now.” - Erik Lehnsherr, 2019

The new era of X-Men is here and for all of its familiarity, it does something new and sort of unsettling with a tried and true formula. This is thanks to the beauty and scale of Larraz’s art and the far and wide nature with which Jonathan Hickman is crafting yet another saga to rival both his SHIELD and Avengers runs. If you let it, House of X will engulf you in a rich new mutant world filled with happiness and untold amounts of pride by it end, but also with a good helping of fear… as if everything is just a little bit off.

The book begins with a great wide shot of a figure staring up at what appears to be the root of or at least some important part of a tree. Two other figures, a woman with red hair and a man with glowing eyes, are birthed from two sacs under the tree and we get the familiar line, “To me, my X-Men. Presumably, this is Charles Xavier and as we progress, this idea is made clear as it seems we are doing away with the “X” identity he took up during Astonishing X-Men (2018). This also serves as some clear symbolism of a new rebirth for the X-Men.

Over the next few panels, we are shown shots of various X-Men planting flowers, plucked from the island of Krakoa, in various areas from their home in Westchester, New York to Mars, the moon and the Savage Land. The book is then framed around Magneto and two of the Stepford Cuckoos giving ambassadors from various countries a tour of the various locales that Krakoa has been placed upon as they ponder Charles’ proposed deal. This deal would allow them to make use of the flowers of Krakoa for various medicinal purposes, possibly making the world a much better place, so long as they agree to recognizing the sovereignty of the Krakoa nation state. A new Haven for Mutantkind.

Of course there have been such efforts made in the past. Genosha, the first and most prominently mentioned example, is alluded to have been the catalyst for humankind not being taken over by the mutant X gene. Mutantkind apparently would have become the dominant race on the planet Earth within ten years if not for Genosha’s destruction. Asteroid M and Utopia weren’t mentioned, but my guess is that they simply weren’t as impactful in regard to mutant kind likely because of the events of House of M (2005) dwindling their numbers to nothing. As it stands now, after the implementation of Krakoa spiking the birth rates to much higher than previously calculated, that humanity has about 20 years left.

These estimations are made by a brand new organization known as The Orchis Protocol, a network built for the purpose of monitoring evolutionary anomalies and preparing a doomsday protocol in case humanity is threatened by Homo Superior. The organization apparently consists of ex assets from practically all major organizations in the Marvel Universe from AIM, SHIELD and Hydra to even Hammer, Alpha Flight and SWORD. Some of Larraz’s best shots are in the scenes where we’re introduced to this mysterious group. They pilot a ship towards the sun and we get a good shot of the outside of a portion of their space station as they dock their ship.

Karima, an Omega Sentinel character that hasn’t been seen since sometime after Second Coming (2010) accompanies an Orchis higher up as they talk about the state of absolutely giant station so close to the sun. We get a bit of a tour before we get the best and most ominous shot of the full station. It appears to be the head of MASTER MOLD surrounded by hexagonal plates, the most terrifying shape in all of fiction. Master Mold hasn’t been really seen since about 1994, and again in 2010 because of universe jump in Second Coming. Master Mold was one of the X-Men’s most dangerous threats for it ability to produce sentinels at a rapid rate, so there’s no way that this can mean anything good.

Cutting back to New York, Mystique, Sabretooth and Toad are stealing information from the Damage Control Database. Mystique and Toad manage to get away, but Creed is captured by Invisible Woman and the rest of the Fantastic Four. Scott Summers shows up to remind them of the amnesty that’s apparently been granted to mutants, including thieves and possible killers like Sabretooth. Scott and, normally even tempered, Reed butt heads a little bit as Reed has a problem with Sabretooth getting away with his crimes and Scott acquiesces, seeing that Reed is serious. Scott does leave them with one sick burn as he tells Reed and Sue that Franklin has actual family on Krakoa when he’s ready.

What I love best about this scene is just how smug Reed is about all of this. For years, mutants have tried to stay out of the affairs of the greater Superhero world out of fear for their reputations. The shoe is on the other foot now that they have all of the leverage and the power that they so deserve. Even more awesomely, Scott’s new costume is a fantastic design combining the best of his Astonishing costume with the angular design of his Uncanny X-Men costume, minus the X mask, with blue lines instead of red.

Speaking of colors, Marte Garcia excelled in this regard. There’s so much symbolism to be gleaned from something as simple as a color change. Cyclops wore that suit in a red hue when he was a violent radical; having it recolored blue gives off the hint that he’s still a radical, but in the way that he dealt with the situation between Reed, he’s more hands off, non-violent even. Magneto normally wears red and purple when he’s angry and evil and gray during the AXIS (2015) era and that alluded to his anti-hero nature during that time. This go around he’s wearing white. He’s also peaceful, but at the same time he’s as graceful and imposing as he always has been, never betraying the idea that he is still the same man, but won’t harm anyone as long as they respect mutants. The most glaring example is the change in color from the AIM scientists where they’re wearing red instead of yellow.

In between each different scene we’re given these little interludes in the form of documents called Xavier files. These give some background on the new elements introduced in the book and the best one is the Omega Level file. There have been hundreds of mutants introduced over the years, many of which could have been considered Omega Level mutants, but thanks to Hickman’s expert writing, things have been parsed down to just fourteen. On Twitter, he stated that the X-Men lore was nothing but chaos, so he wrote a 14,000 word memo on what the new status quo would be, including limiting the use of the term “Omega Level.” This undoubtedly helps to establish something of a power structure given the high number of mutants that are known about while also acknowledging other heroes. Notably, while Forge is a master of technopathy, his level has been surpassed by humans in the past, but Magneto is the only master of Magnetism.

I want to bring things back to the tour. After it is over, several of the ambassadors agree to support Xavier. Russia’s ambassador never had intentions too, neither did one of the representatives of STRIKE as he was simply assigned to watch another ambassador. The last ambassador had a weapon hidden and Magneto immediately dismantles it and promises to each of them that things will be different. He wants them to tell their superiors that while Charles made the offer out of grace and love, it is NOT a negotiation.

Magneto takes pride in this. So much so that his assurance and steadfastness in his stance is powerful. It moved me. He tells them to be grateful for the bounty they’re receiving out of graciousness as mutants, like Thanos, are inevitable. It’s like he can actually see a future, one not shrouded in darkness for mutants and he’s smiling because he knows it’s coming.

This is one of the more interesting aspects of the book. Charles Xavier had always wanted to coexist with humanity, but after years of divisions and attacks, he seems to mostly be done with that. He’s willing to give humanity Krakoa’s flowers to make pills that will help them as long as they leave mutants alone. He’s effectively made something that will definitely topple the pharmaceutical market and he has to know that humanity would start to get very afraid. Not only that, but Krakoa has the ability to create portals that can move mutants from place to place without humans being able to track where they’re going. Of course the ambassadors are afraid of the use they could have as far as movement and positioning in case things went to war, but Magneto assures them that it is only them that wants war.

Everything seems perfect. Everything seems like it’s going to be alright, but that helmet… something about that helmet and the bodysuit reminds me of The Maker, another Jonathan Hickman creation from his turn on The Ultimates. It scares me and I needed that, I needed something to keep me hooked and the fear that everything is not as it seems is just that.

House of X hit the ground running. While it does little to acknowledge the fantastic Uncanny X-Men run from Matthew Rosenberg, that’s probably for the best. Jonathan Hickman does his best work when he has a fresh slate. He took over Avengers from Brian Michael Bendis and made an amazing story over the course of nearly four years. He reinvigorated SHIELD and the Fantastic Four with innovative stories that had nothing to do with the books prior to them. Hell, the reverberations of his runs on each of these are still being felt to this day.

Pepe Larraz was possibly the absolute best artist to capture Hickman’s vision for this project. His high angles and wide shots give credence to the size of the story. His facial expressions give into the idea that mutants have won this time, there’s hope where previously there was none. Body language surprisingly upbeat, bouncy even. There’s a lot to say about symbolism in terms of sun positioning in many scenes. The book has many showing the sun rising, symbolically showing a rise for the mutants. I see Orchis base near the sun as an allegory for Icarus flying too close to it. As the book ends with a sunset over Jerusalem, I see things as the sun setting on the time of humanity.

X-Men and their vast history is absolutely ripe for fine tuning if not complete destruction only for it to be made bigger and better in the years to come. I have no idea where this story is going and with 80,000 spin-offs incoming with a bunch of different creative teams, there will absolutely be something for everyone. In an attempt to revitalize a part of the world that used to sell like gangbusters, Jonathan Hickman is gearing up to shoot the X-Men right back up to the moon and light the world on fire behind them.

[shkspr]

The Gospel according to David and Michael

transcribed from [x]

Good Omens, Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett’s darkly comic novel about the battle between good and evil, comes to Amazon Prime this spring. To mark the occasion, the British stars of this hugely anticipated show  — Michael Sheen and David Tennant  — take New York in style. HAYLEY CAMPBELL meets them.

It’s Sunday morning in New York City and it’s snowing outside the warm, jazz-filled Beekman hotel, where a 50th-birthday balloon has been trapped for months at the apex of the glass atrium at the top of one of the city’s first skyscrapers. One thousand New Year’s Eve balloons have risen and fallen in the time this one silver balloon has taken to not die. If the apocalypse were to arrive tomorrow, this balloon would survive along with the cockroaches, the deep-sea fish, and the angel and the demon who tried to avert the disaster. If the prophecies of Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman’s cult novel Good Omens prove to be correct, this balloon would bob high above their heads as it is doing now — above Michael Sheen and David Tennant, light and dark, good and evil, an angel and a demon sitting either side of me in lower Manhattan, eating eggs.

I last saw these two together in 2017, in the middle of London’s Battersea Park, shooting some early scenes of their hugely anticipated television show. Good Omens is about the birth of Satan, the coming of the End Times, and an angel (Aziraphale — who has been living on Earth since the dawn of creation and is currently working in a bookshop avoiding selling books because he really just likes to collect them) and a demon (Crowley — who used to be known as Crawly, the snake who tempted Eve with the apple). The pair have spent so much time on earth that they’ve come to quite like it, and don’t much fancy the idea of it all ending. The novel was published in 1990 and has gone on to become so loved that it is rare to see a pristine copy in the world: copies of Good Omens almost always come pre-dunked in tea. Shortly before his death from Alzheimer’s in early 2015, Pratchett wrote an email to his collaborator Gaiman asking him to take it to the screen, to do it properly. “I’m making it for Terry,” says Gaiman. “I wanted to make the thing that Terry would have liked.”

Sheen and Tennant star as the angelic and demonic representatives of their respective head offices, Heaven and Hell, along with a knee-weakening list of stars including Jon Hamm as the archangel Gabriel, Spinal Tap’s Michael McKean as the last of a once proud witchfinder army, and Frances McDormand as the voice of God. There’s Miranda Richardson, Jack Whitehall, three quarters of the League of Gentlemen, and Nick Offerman as the father of the Antichrist (sort of). The cast list reads like someone collecting acting talent to put on an ark ready for a biblical flood.

For months, we have tried to get them together again to talk about the end of the world. But life and work had them circling the globe separately, unmatchable as opposing magnets. Sheen is currently in New York filming The Good Fight, in which he plays a Machiavellian lawyer, and Tennant has flown in on the red-eye from Phoenix, Arizona, where he was appearing at the Ace Comic Con, mobbed by Doctor Who fans. Both of them have, since they last saw each other, grown beards. Tennant is ecstatic about the beards, and both are thrilled to see each other, and New York, again.

“I’ve spent a lot of time in New York over the years now,” says Sheen. “But still there’s times where you look at something and you think it just looks so incredibly beautiful, or strange, or filmic. It never loses that sense of unreality. I love being able to take it in by walking through the streets. Los Angeles feels like everything happens indoors, whereas here in New York, everything happens outdoors.”

“I do like New York,” adds Tennant. “I love a big city, and I love a busy city.”

Tennant and Sheen have bumped into each other before, both appearing in Stephen Fry’s 2003 film Bright Young Things, but they were never in the same scene. Sheen voice a character in an episode of Doctor Who written by Gaiman, but by then Tennant’s Doctor had regenerated. They tend to go for similar roles so there’s rarely a chance for them to both be cast — it’s usually one or the other. Gaiman, the author and showrunner of Good Omens, selected Sheen for the role. “I’ve known Michael for about a decade and one of the things that always impressed me about him was his goodness,” he says. “He’s just very good. He radiates goodness and lovability. I was always fascinated by the fact that he tends to play characters who, at least on the outside, are sort of brittle and perhaps a little damaged or dangerous.”

Selecting an actor to play the BMW driving, skinny-jeans-wearing demon was an equally tricky task. “For David, I was writing episode three and there is a scene set in a church. I had to bring Crowley on and suddenly I knew exactly how I needed that scene to be done in order to work: with him coming down the aisle hopping from foot to foot, going ‘ow ow ow ow ow!’ like he’s at the beach in bare feet. Only David Tennant could do that right. People seemed baffled when it was announced that they were cast because they’re a similar kind of actor, but the similarities between them felt so incredibly right when you’re building this kind of thing.”

Tennant and Sheen joke that when the theatre production of Good Omens (hold your horses, there isn’t one) travels the world, they will swap roles every night, even though Sheen says he couldn’t imagine it the other way around: “Ultimately I don’t think I can pull off cool,” he says, as Tennant scoffs in disbelief. “I think it just suits my natural being, that I’m kind of a worrier, and a little bit too anal for my own good. Things annoy me if they’re not quite right. And yet I like to think of myself as being a good person. So all of that hypocrisy and finickiness seems to lend itself to the natural rhythm of Aziraphale.”

“I love that you describe Crowley as cool,” laughs Tennant. “I think he thinks he’s cool, but isn’t.”

Tennant is adamant that having Gaiman as a showrunner is the pin that is holding this strange world together, one that is “tonally sort of nebulous”, but definitely very funny, and one that would benefit from a bingewatch to take it in all at once (all six episodes will be available on Amazon at once and later the BBC will broadcast them week-by-week). “I think if anyone else was running this they would’ve normalised it, would’ve made it saner, and would’ve ironed out some of the quirks of it,” he says. “Neil’s been fantastically clever at making it televisual where he had to, but it still has the madness, the impracticality of the book.”

Plus, there’s the fact that Gaiman is 50 per cent of the book. Because of that, his casting choices landed a little more softly in the world of Good Omens fandom. But Sheen and Tennant aren’t too worried about being unwelcome: they have in their short time as Aziraphale and Crowley discovered that Good Omens fans may be devoted to the point of madness (the cosplay and pornographic fan fiction has already begun), but they are certainly kind. “I have found that Neil’s work is almost like the Arthurian sword in the stone,” says Sheen. “You can only pull the sword out if you are pure of heart. And I think you only like Neil’s stuff if there’s something about you that means you won’t be mean to people on the whole.”

“I think that’s true of Doctor Who fans as well,” says Tennant. “If your mind is set in that way, then you have a generosity of spirit. And there’s quite an overlap between the two fandoms.”

They seem almost wistful until I bring up the airfield. Days after filming during a cold snap in Battersea Park, where we huddled like penguins around glowing heaters in tents, production moved to an airfield outside London where they had built a fake Soho to house Aziraphale’s bookshop. It was the place that changed everyone’s idea of what ‘cold’ actually meant, but it also became the ultimate green room of all time. Both of them look wide-eyed at the mention of the place, for both reasons.

“That blasted airfield! It was blasted in every sense of the word,” says Tennant. “But the great joy was you had all the cast together at once. Between takes we had this big trailer where they would blast the heaters and we’d go and recover.”

“We’d drink hot chocolate, tell stories, and watch TV,” beams Sheen, who says the thing he misses most about the UK is the fact that he can mention The Flumps and people actually know what that is.

“But the only TV channel that would work was some version of Turner Classic Movies,” says Tennant. “Ancient old movies on a loop. Michael McKean would just sit there telling us stories about people he knew or about some sort of terrible Hollywood lifestyle they’d once lived.”

Though it took months to get them both in the same room in the same city, it is a genuine treat to see Sheen and Tennant together. They seem to prop each other up, to fill the space where the other is not, in both acting and conversing. Neither steps on the other’s toes. Above all, they seem to have a deep respect for one another. “It genuinely made me sad when we stopped filming,” says Sheen. “I didn’t want to not be doing it any more.” Good Omens makes you wonder why nobody thought of putting them together sooner. It is the strangest buddy story so far, the one just before the end of the world, starring the most unlikely pals who for some reason quite like each other — mostly because they’ve just been posted here a bit too long by their superiors so they have more in common with each other than they do with Heaven or Hell — and, crucially, quite like us. It’s the kind of thing that makes you believe the world is worth saving.

[kindcstguardian]

MISC.

i. / basics.

Name. Lynn Darcy. Nicknames. Troublemaker, sweetie, Candy Birthday. Age. 17-23 years old. Nationality. French. Languages. French, English &&. Spanish. Gender. Cis female. Sexuality. Bisexual. Status. Single. Occupation. Student &&. part-time worker in Cosy Bear Café. Speciality. Finding solutions to problems that aren’t hers and, instead, causing them in her own. Hobbies. Jogging, boxing, taking care of plants, ocasionally playing basketball.

ii. / physical.

Height. 160cm / 5′ 3″ Weight. 50kg / 110 lb Hair color. Brown. Eye color. Green. Blood type. O + Appearance. A petite female with a slightly built body  ( at the moment due her newfound interesting in boxing ).  Long hair naturally straight with chocolate brown pigment alongside green eyes.

VERSES.

Main verse. TAG.  「 MAIN ／ Lynn 」

Highschool student, 17 years old.  As a transfer student, she is a bit clueless and lost at the beggining. However, she quickly got used to the institute and learnt every little secret of it. Still, this does not apply to actual people. Lynn does have a lot of friends, though, and is quite close to Kim due having her as lab partner in Chemistry. But she doesn’t get along with Amber, Capuccine, Li or Charlotte. Peggy is on thin ice. Ah but, ever so caring Lynn — she can’t help but always want to help everyone.

MCLUL verse. TAG.  「 SECOND MAIN   ／ Lynn 」

College student, 23 years old. Canon divergent.  Mostly based on what’s taking place in the canon of My Candy Love University Life — except that Lynn never cut ties with all friends and kept in touch with Kentin alone, she still has a hopeless crush on Nathaniel but hasn’t gotten herself involved with anyone, keeping everysingle friend at arm length. So, no route Lynn?

Third main verse. / A different outcome TAG. 「 THIRD MAIN ／ Lynn 」

College student, part-time worker in Kentin’s bakery, 23 year old.  She didn’t want to be bossed around by her parents, neither leaving the city she grew to love. In fact, she wanted her freedom but Lynn wasn’t having it so easy.   From a side, her parents had stood their ground but so she did, fully determinated to stay. They all bickered and argued, raising their tone than trying to find a solution — that was, until Aunt Agatha got in the middle and decided to take care of the situation.   After much talking and convincing, she persuaded Lucia and Philip. Thus, leading Lynn to win only one obstacle from the many that would appear in her road.   Happily that she got to stay rather than losing all connections, she first started to help Kentin before deciding what she wanted to do with her future.

Fourth main verse. / What if? TAG. 「 FOURTH MAIN ／ Lynn 」

Highschool student, 17 years old.  So what if she could see the relationship stats that she had with other people? Like, a visual novel game? Well, that was about it! It was strange but she could not see options at all, she had free speech ( thankfully ) which allowed her faster to either improve or fuck up further her relationships.

Persona 5 verse. TAG. 「P5 ／ Lynn」

Highschool transfer student, Star, 17 years old.   ‘ You have truly made me wait, I am known for being impatient, ma fille, but I will allow it this time ’ , the brunette fell to knees, holding her head while she screamed in utter pain, tears rolling down her cheeks while her eyes were shut, trying to somehow make the pain bereable. All background noise was blocked, overpowered by a female voice inside her mind. ’ You have always clenched your fists and withdrawn for the fight, doing little to nothing. Finally, you have grown tired; let us form a pact, shall we? ’.     The voice was right, Lynn had enough. Taking blow after blow, being ridiculized, embarrassed and tossed aside — being the stepping stone others needed to feel superior while she put on a show, the happy pierrot that everyone relied onto but whom never spoke a single struggle. It was time for her to realize her own worth and speak her mind, yell to the four winds her heart’s desires; to defend and attack instead of being a mere broken shield.   ’ I am thou, thou art I we cannot tear out a single page of our life, but we can throw the whole book in the fire! They can bind our body and tie our hands but nothing can be done nor can shatter our will! ’, the hands that once had been holding her head were now on the floor underneath her, helping her to push herself up slowly — green hues had turned yellow and filled with such aggresive determination that she had never felt before. Straightening her back, her right hand placed itself before the mask that had manifested to existence, gripping it hard, she pulled away at once — blood running down her eyes.   “ We shall show them what we are made of, come to me Amantine! ”

Eldarya verse TAG. 「Eldarya ／ Lynn 」

College student, 23 years old. Absynthe Garde / Alchemist.  As a descendant of a human, her father Philip, and a fairy, her mother Lucia, Lynn is a faerie. However, she was never told about the truth and because of her clueless nature, she never suspected anything weird  ( not even when her aunt would show up in particular clothes which she lied that it was part of her job as a dentist not to scare children, including wings on her back as part of the costume ).  Which is precisely how she stepped in the thin line of human world and magic world, the blindfold had been finally removed. Currently stuck in Eldarya and unable to return nor communicate with her parents, Lynn spends her days working to win the meal of the day alongside an elf named Ezarel as an assistant for the potions he needs to create, but mostly errand girl: running here and there to provide everything on time.

Mystic Messenger. / MC1. TAG. 「MysMe ／ Lynn 」

College student, 23 years old.   Actually, Lynn isn’t sure how she found herself in Korea. Mostly, trying to be a good friend for Hyun and be his emotional support friend when he needed one given his grandfather had gotten terribly ill and chances were… No, no. She shouldn’t focus there. In fact, she should focus on finding the place her friend had indicated that both were staying at — yet, things rarely go as planned. Sometimes, the female felt that she was a magnet to problems. A message, an adress and a distressed person were the formula to lure her towards an unknown appartment in which she ended up locked. Stuck in a position of party hoster of sorts, Lynn Darcy chose not to fight her fate and assume her role. Kim Yoosung, Kang Jaehee, Hyun Ryu, Han Jumin and Choi Luciel needed her, after all. And God knows how big her heart is to leave without providing the needed help.

Shall we date? Destiny Ninja 2 + TAG. 「Destiny Ninja 2 +／ Lynn 」

Living in the Spring Village has been a wonderful experience since she can recall, to wake up everyday and see how flowers would blossom — new ones that would arrive because of the ocasional windy days and carry along new seeds for the view to change, take different shape and colors. Yet that lovely experience started to come to an end when the Yamato Island began to get corrupted. Was the story they told her as kids to make her fear true? All Lynn can do is pray and keep up with her training; she might not be an expert, but basic defense moves could safe her. Besides, her father had always taught her how to use a gun since possessing a sword was more of an honor, a lifestyle.

Shall we date? Blood in roses + TAG. 「Blood in roses ／ Lynn 」

It was a poor idea for a human to wander into a castle, but after having lost her family, the brunette found no better choice than try to find a temporal refugee. Much to her horror, it turned out to be the rumored Hotel Libra Sincera — unable to return nor escape because she had nowhere to go, she decided to step inside that place.   Truthfully, Lynn never thought she would use a Humphrey’s bottle of False Mist that her mother had bought to her at age nine in case something bad would happen to them. It was easy to forget about it but Lucia has insisted for Lynn to carry it at all times; and now, she could finally use it.

Wizardess heart + TAG. 「Wizardess heart + ／ Lynn 」

Student &&. buddyless, 17 years old, spellsinger. TBA.

Ephemeral: Residents in the dark. TAG. 「Ephemeral ／ 010」

Student, 120 years old, half-breed.   A lovechild from a vampire and a human, a horrible sin for all creatures that should have been killed hasn’t been that she was born with the strongest gen as expected, which is the single reason she had managed to survive thus far in the world were ranks meant everything.   However, her mother had been murdered by other humans as soon as it was discovered that there were vampires within their world — Philippe had returned with shame and head hung low back to his family. Forced into a marriage with another woman, a mermaid that grew to terribly hate Lynn going as far as to dig her nails into Lynn’s wrists due being young and beautiful.   To say Lynn was grateful to being accepted into that prestigious institution wasn’t enough, she decided to stay and live there. Refusing to return to a place where her stepmother wanted her head in a spike — yet, her secret keeps her awake at night, what would happen if she was discovered?

ANIMAL.

Main verse.

TAG. 

23 years old. WIP. 

Aggrestuko verse./ Publishing department. TAG. 

Office lady, 24 years old. Lynn Darcy had studied art history, however, she did not find many jobs suitable for that and ended up undergoing trainment to become a ‘desk person'—work in an office and fall into a comfortable routine for another year and a half.

TAGS.

「 Lynn Darcy   ／   𝓬𝓪𝓷𝓭𝔂 ┊ swcctlcve 」

「 Lynn Darcy ／ INQUIRY」

「 Lynn Darcy ／ MUSINGS 」

「 Lynn Darcy ／ VISAGE 」

「 Lynn Darcy ／ MANNERISMS 」

「 Lynn Darcy ／ INTROSPECTION」

「 Lynn Darcy ／ ROMANCE 」

「 Lynn Darcy ／ CRACK 」

RELATIONSHIPS.

DISCLAIMER.  I will not ship with the same character more than once unless my partner tells me they will no longer write said character and, therefore, the ship spot is free again. Please, do not force the issue.   001. Will you have exclusives?   If my partner and I discuss it before hand, then yes.   002. Will you have mains?   This will be more popular but yes, I will have limit of three mains.

KENTIN BRONSWORTH. ROMANTIC TAG.  ✘ · Kentin Bronsworth ♡（ ᵒᵘʳ ʰᵉᵃʳᵗˢ ᵇᵉᵃᵗⁱⁿᵍ ᵃˢ ᵒⁿᵉ ᵃᵗ ˡᵃˢᵗ ⁻ ⁱ'ᵐ ˢᵒʳʳʸ ᶠᵒʳ ᵗʰᵉ ʷᵃⁱᵗ ） FRIENDSHIP TAG.  kcntin ; ʜᴏᴘᴇ（ φιλíα ） ABOUT.

RAVEN KENDALL. ROMANTIC TAG.  ✘ · Raven Kendall ♡「 ᴵᶠ ᴵ ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵗᵉˡˡ ʰᵉʳ ʰᵒʷ ˢʰᵉ'ˢ ᵉᵛᵉʳʸᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ ᵗᵒ ᵐᵉ ᵇᵘᵗ ʷᵉ'ʳᵉ ᵃ ᵐⁱˡˡⁱᵒⁿ ʷᵒʳˡᵈˢ ᵃᵖᵃʳᵗ」 FRIENDSHIP TAG. ABOUT.

HAIDA HYENA. ROMANTIC TAG.  ✘ · Haida Hyena ♡「 ᵉᵛᵉⁿ ⁱᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᶠᵃˡˡ ᴵ ʷⁱˡˡ ᵇᵉ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ ᵗᵒ ᶜᵃᵗᶜʰ ʸᵒᵘ ／ starryburglar 」 FRIENDSHIP TAG. ABOUT.

✘ ·   ♡（ ）

✘ ·  ♡（  ）

[artificialqueens]

First Bad Habit (Ravja) - Chardonnay

A/N: Saw a request for a fic based on Raven’s interview for HeyQween where she mentions Raja calling her ‘hot’, and thought i’d give it a shot. Set pre-RPDR when Raja used to work on America’s Next Top Model. Please be kind it’s my first time!

David was bored out of his mind as he stood behind the Mac counter where he worked in Montclair, waiting for the head manager to get back from lunch so he could finally tell them he was leaving. He leaned on the counter with his head in his hands, looking at the clock. They were extremely slow that day, so David was left alone to think about how he was going to do it. Should he just keep it short and direct? They were going to look at him like he was nuts if he told them the real reason he was quitting was to focus on his career as a drag queen. Or maybe he should make a big scene about it, leave like a true diva.

It’s not that David hated his job, he loved getting to play with the makeup and sharing his expertise with those who weren’t blessed with his superior skills, but he was growing tired of the limitations it put on his artistic creativity. People always asked for the same damn thing. He swore eventually everyone would just look like a clone of the person next to them, and it was becoming monotonous. He’d been dabbling in drag for the past 5 or so years, and it was the most exciting and freeing part of his life. He was good at it too, (at least in his own opinion) and after watching and befriending other queens who had been in the game a long time, David knew this is what he wanted to do for the rest of his life.

His daydreams of living the life of a full-time drag queen were interrupted when he heard his phone ring in his pocket. Usually he would never answer it on the clock, but he was quitting today anyways and there were next to no customers, so what the hell? What are they gonna do? Fire him?

David flipped open the phone, hoping it was someone who could relieve his boredom. It turned out to be Sutan, better known as Raja, another queen who he had become pretty close with over the last few years of working in the same bars. As he answered the phone, David thought about the days before drag when he used to go drink at the local bars and watch the queens perform. Raja had always been his favorite to watch, he was always so captivated and impressed by her. Even years later, at times it was still surreal that now they were friends who hung out and just casually called each other.

“So I have a question for you”, Sutan started.

“Okay…” David knew Sutan pretty well by now and his “questions” were sometimes a bit outlandish and outrageous.

“Are you available 2 weeks from now?”

David raised his eyebrows, “Uh, actually I probably will be, I was right about to quit my job when you called”

“Really? Why?”

David noticed his boss had come back from lunch and was staring at him like he had three heads. She didn’t seem happy that David was just casually chatting on his phone in the middle of his shift, but he didn’t care.

“Oh you know, I just get bored. This place is so slow, I need a change and I kinda just want to focus on drag more…”

“Well good news then!” Sutan replied. “You know how I’ve been working on the set of Top Model? Well they’re looking for male models for an upcoming shoot-“

“Girl, you know I am not a male model.”

“No no I know that, but they’re looking for drag queens who are also good looking guys, you know how it is in Hollywood.”

David smiled into the phone. “So you called me?”

“Uhh yeah…I’m on the phone with you aren’t I?”

“You think I’m hot as a guy?” he prodded, a grin spreading across his face.

“Oh my god, is that really what you’re focussing on here?” Sutan laughed “I’m offering you a job!”

“Mmm okay, avoiding the subject” David smirked. His manager looked like an angry cartoon character, like steam would come out of her ears at any moment. “Yes, I am available.”

“Great! I’ll call you again closer to the shoot and give you all the details, maybe we can have lunch or something next week?”

“Yeah that would be nice” David said, “I gotta go, my manager looks like she’s gonna kill me”

“Good luck quitting!”

“Thanks” David hung up the phone. At least now he knew how he was going to quit. He walked over to his manager who was about to start yelling and lecturing about being distracted on the job, but before she could even get a word out David cut her off. “Oops so sorry about that” he said sarcastically as he handed her his makeup belt, “I just booked a gig on America’s Next Top Model so…I quit.” He smiled as he sauntered out of the store and never looked back.

………………………………………………………………………………………

2 weeks later David walked on to the set where they filmed Top Model. He didn’t have much experience working on professional filming sets so he was a bit nervous, but as soon as he spotted Rhea and Raja who waved him over he relaxed. David didn’t want to show his nerves, he wanted to come across as cool, confident and professional. But he also couldn’t stop thinking about Raja’s comment a couple weeks ago about finding David hot, he hadn’t really stopped thinking about it since. David obviously knew he was an attractive guy, he’s not an idiot, but for some reason hearing it from Sutan was different. Sutan was absolutely beautiful, both in and out of drag. He was probably the most beautiful person David had ever met in his life, and he lived in West Hollywood where everyone is pretty! But there was something so alluring about Sutan. David had been such a fan of Raja for a long time, so the prospect of Sutan finding him hot enough to call him, out of all the queens he must know, was sending David for a loop. He could’ve called anyone!? David quickly snapped out of it when he heard Sutan’s voice.

“Hey Rave! You made it without getting lost!”

David rolled his eyes. “You’re the one who’s bad with directions bitch, not me.”

Sutan smiled, he had the most magnetic smile. “Whatever, I’m just glad you’re here,” he looked at them both, “The director will explain to you guys what he wants from you. I’m mostly just going to be back here painting the girls, but I told the producers that you guys will probably want to paint yourselves-”

“Yes, thank God!” David teased “because I am so not letting you anywhere near my face”

“Bitch you would be so lucky to be painted by me” Raja feigned offense as they both giggled.

The rest of the models arrived on set and David began his drastic transformation into Raven. He took his time making sure every detail was perfect. This was the first time Raven was going to be on national television so she had to look nothing less than flawless. Every so often David would pause and look in the mirror to find Sutan who was busy working away. It was fascinating to watch him work, so concentrated and beautiful like a Greek statue, but David had to remind himself to focus on the task at hand.

Once she had finally finished her makeup Raven felt her nerves dissipate and the confidence and fierceness of her drag persona coming through. The stylists were deciding who would wear which outfit and which queen was paired with which model. Sutan walked over to help,

“Oh Raven would look really fantastic in a business jacket and skirt, yeah that one! And she looks great in these blunt banged wigs and big curly hair too.” Raven smiled softly at the compliment and couldn’t help noticing Sutan’s eyes all over her and how overly touchy he was being. “Stop, he’s just doing his job”she thought to herself.

The shoot was great and even though Raven didn’t have a ton of formal modelling experience, she took direction from the photographer and felt fierce as fuck. The photographers and producers praised her natural beauty and poise, and everything seemed to go extremely well. After they wrapped Raven went over to her makeup station and started to de-drag back into David. Sutan came up behind her in the mirror and smiled.

“You did so good,” he gushed. “Tyra actually came up and asked me about you. She was super impressed and said you were absolutely stunning.”

“Really?” Raven wasn’t one to make a big deal over random compliments, but being noticed by Tyra Banks was a pretty big deal.

“Yes! Are you kidding me? You looked so fucking good in front of that camera.” Sutan playfully pushed her shoulder and locked eyes with her in the mirror. His fingers lingered as they ran down Raven’s back over her exposed tattoo, making her shiver. “You’re a natural.”

Sutan seemed to pause for a second before he continued, “Hey me and Rhea are going for drinks after, you wanna come?”

Raven was still focussed on Sutan’s fingers running down her back. “Sure, once I get all this shit off my face” she tried her best to sound casual.

Sutan smiled, “cool I’ll come grab you before we leave.”

……………………………………………………………………………………

David and Sutan sat at the bar with Rhea, the three of them chatting and laughing about work and drag. Sutan was telling the most ridiculous stories about things that had happened while he was on set and the insane models he’s had to work with. He was such an over-dramatic storyteller, actually just a dramatic person in general, but he always managed to make David laugh. Their conversations flowed so easily when they were together. They both held similar interests and loved to talk all the shit, so they were always laughing about something or someone. But tonight felt different. Maybe it was the ample amount of alcohol flowing through him, but he swore Sutan was being extremely touchy and flirty. Every so often he would grab David’s leg when they laughed or softly touch his arm or hold onto his hand to get his attention. They would tease each other back and forth as they usually did, but something in Sutan’s smile was different, it was mischievous and playful.

After a couple of hours, Rhea announced that he was heading out. David was actually enjoying getting to know Sutan’s drag daughter more, but he was also glad to have some time alone with his friend. After saying their goodbyes, Sutan turned to David, both of them already tipsy.

“I think you owe me another drink, considering I got you a job and all” he said as he glanced down at their empty glasses.

“Oh I owe you huh?” David quipped as Sutan smiled that playful smile. “I didn’t realize this job came with a price tag.”

“Well I mean I was nice enough to call you and give you an excuse to quit your job. I think it’s the least you could do…” he reached for David’s forearm and began tracing circles on the top of his wrist. “I think a drink is a good place to start, don’t you?”

David watched Sutan’s touch, the buzz from the alcohol making it feel all the more sensual. David took a deep breath, determined to keep his cool “Okay fine”, he said finally “what are we drinking?”

“Mmm, let’s have another whisky”, Sutan’s hand never leaving David’s arm, “unless you want a shot of tequila?”

“Oh bitch no. Not unless you want me climbing all over this bar.”

“Maybe I do?” Sutan said as he gave David’s wrist a small squeeze, “sounds like a good time to me.”

David rolled his eyes and shook his head in amusement before ordering another round of Jack on the rocks. Tequila did make him crazy and wild, but whisky also made him horny as hell. As they sat and drank another couple rounds, chatting and laughing, David was really starting to feel the alcohol and Sutan was getting even more grabby and flirty. There was no mistaking it now, from the way Sutan was constantly touching and inching closer and closer, their bodies so close David could smell the mix of weed and liquor and whatever intoxicating scent radiated from his skin, Sutan was definitely coming on to him.

David was feeling so many emotions all at once, also clouded by the alcohol he consumed. Most of all he was excited, Sutan was an extremely attractive guy who always seemed out of reach. Being such a socialite, David never would have thought Sutan would be interested in him like this. However he was also getting very possessive vibes from his friend. David had always considered himself a “top” and hadn’t bottomed for anyone in quite a while, but he was surprisingly enjoying Sutan’s attentions and the nervousness was making him feel a little submissive. This was so not like him. Usually David was the confident and flirty one, cracking jokes and teasing, but Sutan made him feel so different. Maybe it was just the nerves, but he had the sudden urge to follow Sutan anywhere and let him do whatever he wanted. I mean he did get David this job after all, it was the least he could do…

After finishing the last sip of his drink, Sutan decided he needed a cigarette so the two of them headed out back behind the bar. They had already been there for hours and it was getting late, but David had absolutely no desire to go home to Riverside. They made their way towards the back door, and Sutan nonchalantly reached back to grab David’s hand as they moved through the crowd of people. Once outside, they both lit a cigarette and continued their inebriated small talk. David felt the sexual charge between them, so palpable he could almost see it. He tried to break some of the tension by poking fun at their conversation from a couple weeks ago.

“So you never answered my question that day that you called me.” David said before taking another drag of his cigarette.

“Huh?”

“I asked if you thought I was hot as a guy, because you called me when you said you needed hot guys, but then you avoided the question.”

Sutan rolled his eyes and smirked “Please, you already know you’re hot. You own a mirror.”

“Well of course I do, but I just like to hear you say it…” David teased, laughing softly and finishing his cigarette.

Sutan wasn’t laughing. In fact for a moment he looked at David with such intensity it almost made him uncomfortable. Finally he broke his stare as he put out his own cigarette and responded in a low tone “Do you now?” He looked up with a small smile, straight into David’s eyes. “Well I can say it again if you want, but you have to ask nicely.” Sutan took a slow, small step towards David who felt his breath catch as he subconsciously took a step back. What was Sutan doing to him? Making him ask nicely? This commanding behaviour was unusual to David, but strangely he found it so sexy. He wasn’t sure if it was the whisky or Sutan’s words, probably a mixture of both, but he hadn’t felt this aroused by someone in a long time. He looked into Sutan’s dark and domineering eyes, and then at his mouth.

“Say it again” David murmured softly. The corner of Sutan’s mouth lifted into a smile as he cocked his head to one side, waiting. He took another small step towards David who felt his back hit the brick wall behind him.

“Please?”

David’s eyes lifted back to Sutan’s as he held his breath and waited for an answer, but instead Sutan took another step and closed the small distance between them. His hands pressed David’s biceps into the wall. His lips hovered over David’s, not quite touching. Eyes closed, he brushed their noses softly against each other and felt David exhale against his skin. Sutan’s right hand moved to hold David’s neck as his lips lightly trailed along the defined angle of David’s jaw and up to his ear. He could feel the quick, steady pulse of his heartbeat. “I think you’re so fucking hot” he breathed into David’s ear, lightly licking at his earlobe. David closed his eyes as he felt Sutan’s nose brush the side of his face before his lips moved back across David’s jaw. Both of his hands came up to frame either side of David’s face. Feeling the heavy breathing, Sutan smiled against David’s lips at the thought of already having him so worked up. Finally he closed the distance completely, forcefully pressing his lips into David’s while he held the sides of his face. Deep in his throat, Sutan hummed in appreciation. This was something he’d been dreaming of doing for a long time.

David opened his mouth just slightly and Sutan immediately took the opportunity to slip his tongue inside. He was in complete control and David didn’t have any choice but to follow his lead. He softly moaned at the feeling of Sutan sucking on his bottom lip as his hands gripped onto Sutan’s leather jacket. This complete submission was new to him, but he actually liked the feeling of someone else taking control. Their kiss was very slow, both of them taking the opportunity to explore each other’s mouths for the first time, tasting each other’s tongues and the whisky they’d shared moments before. Sutan pressed their bodies further into the wall as he leaned down to place kisses along David’s jaw and neck. As his hand slipped down between them to press against the front of David’s jeans, the other queen gasped and finally pushed him away. Sutan opened his eyes, both of them breathing heavily from their indulgence.

Sutan looked at him, confused. “What? You don’t want to?”

“I do but, not here!” David said looking around to see if anyone was watching them.

Sutan smiled at his nervousness, unsure why David was so worried about privacy all of a sudden. “You wanna come back to my place?” David just looked at him and silently nodded, still catching his breath from their impromptu makeout session. Sutan reached up to trace his fingers over David’s swollen lips. “Okay, let’s call a cab”.

………………………………………………………………………………………..

The cab ride was short and filled with stolen touches, quick kisses and nips on the ear. Before they knew it they were standing in Sutan’s apartment, completely intoxicated from the alcohol and one another. David in his drunken state had managed to find the bathroom and prep himself sufficiently while Sutan patiently waited in the main room. David had been to Sutan’s place briefly a couple of times, but tonight he really took his time to absorb his surroundings. The apartment was warm and welcoming, little knickknacks covered every shelf and surface, each with their own story. Beautiful art covered the walls and blankets were strewn across the bed. David walked out towards the main room where he stood, drunk and gazing around the apartment, taking everything in. “I really love how you decorated this place…”

Sutan came from behind and wrapped both of his arms around his waist. Nuzzling into David, he began pressing feather-light kisses to his shoulder and neck. David tilted his head to the side slightly to give Sutan more access, and right away he started to suck on the skin just below David’s ear. His mouth dropped open and his eyes fell closed under Sutan’s touch, the feelings of sucking and licking and nipping at his neck amplified by the alcohol in his bloodstream. David buried his hand in Sutan’s soft hair and moaned when he felt the older queen press his hips into David from behind, feeling the evidence of their playful antics in his pants.

Sutan’s hands drifted under David’s shirt, tugging at the material in his way. Suddenly he took a step back and pulled David’s shirt over his head, immediately followed by his own. David turned around quickly, smiling in surprise and Sutan smiled playfully back before stepping forward and taking David’s head in his hands, kissing him desperately. Through his kiss, Sutan guided David back towards the edge of his bed to sit. He crawled over top of David who leaned back on his elbows without breaking the contact of their lips. Soon after he had David laying down and compliant, Sutan stood back up and gazed at the beautiful man in his bed.

“Take off your pants” he demanded.

David’s eyes widened for a moment as he was initially taken aback by the commanding tone in Sutan’s voice, but also extremely aroused. He obeyed Sutan’s demands and waited, completely naked on the bed, for his next instruction. “Lay back again.” David did as he was told while Sutan stood completely still in front of him, watching intently. “Now turn over” he instructed and once again David complied. He was now laying on his stomach, legs hanging over the edge of the bed and fully exposed to the air. David waited in anticipation for Sutan’s touch but it didn’t come. “Don’t move” was all he was told before hearing the sound of drawers opening and closing behind him, but he followed his instructions and stayed exactly where he was.

David closed his eyes in anticipation. He was thankful he was still a bit drunk from the whisky at the bar and the wine they drank when they got to the apartment because it was helping calm his nerves. David hadn’t bottomed in quite some time and usually didn’t enjoy it much, but something told him tonight would be an exception. He was already so horny and worked up from the wine and the touching, he was looking forward to whatever Sutan had planned for him. While he waited, David laid the side of his head down and thought about how ridiculous he must look just sprawled across the end of the bed like a submissive pet. Then why was the thought of it turning him on so much? David was so new to this, but he was shocked at how easy it was for him. For some reason with Sutan this seemed like a natural role to play. His submission was instinctive and actually pretty hot!

All of these thoughts raced through David’s head and he didn’t even notice Sutan had returned to his position behind him. Sutan got down on his knees and dropped the bottle of lube beside him as he reached out to run his hands over David’s ass. He wasted no time, spreading David apart and running his tongue across the opening. David cried out in surprise which quickly turned into a needy moan at the feeling of Sutan’s mouth on him. He gripped the bedsheets in his hands and groaned as Sutan’s tongue slipped in and out of his hole. “Sutan fuck! Don’t stop.” David couldn’t help but push his hips back against Sutan’s face as he continued his assault, his tongue licking all the way around the entrance and diving inside. Eventually Sutan pulled his face away to see the heavy breathing and look of pleasure on David’s face. He smiled softly, proud of himself for taming David in this way. He saw David open his eyes, searching for Sutan in the absence of his touch.

“What’s wrong babe?” he teased as his hands ran down the back of David’s thighs. “What do you want?” David couldn’t even form the words to tell Sutan what he wanted, but the look on his face said everything. Sutan stood and tilted his head. “You want me to keep going?” he asked as his left hand ran all the way from David’s hair down his back producing a shiver. David, with his head still laying down on the bed, closed his eyes and breathed a faint “yes”.

“What was that?” Sutan prodded, clearly enjoying the game they were playing. He bent down and began covering 2 of his fingers in lube.

“Yes!” David said louder. “Please-”

Sutan laughed at the desperation in David’s voice. He was so worked up and Sutan had barely even started. He hummed low in this throat at the sight in front of him, “Y’know I could get used to seeing you like this David, desperate and begging for me. It’s hot as fuck.” His left hand continued to caress David’s lower back, his fingertips slowly moving down towards his inner thighs. David let out a small whine as Sutan’s fingers danced painfully close to his cock, and then suddenly they were gone. Sutan leaned over David, ensuring he had a clear view of his face so he could watch every second of his reactions (it was always so exciting for him, fucking someone new). Finally Sutan relieved the building pressure and pressed his fingers inside David’s entrance, David cried loudly at the sensation he hadn’t experienced in years. Just like the last time, the initial pain melted into pleasure as Sutan continued to work his fingers inside him. David hissed as he rocked his hips back onto Sutan’s fingers, but he felt the pressure of Sutan’s other hand on his lower back, stilling his movements. Sutan leaned his weight onto David and silently instructed him to stay still. David relaxed and gave into Sutan, closing his eyes and letting him fuck David with his hand.

David’s moans continued to fill the room as Sutan’s fingers scissored inside him and rubbed against his prostate, but he was finding it more and more difficult to stay still. His moans became a whimper when Sutan abruptly pulled his fingers away. He felt Sutan’s hand in his hair and his mouth press a kiss to his jaw before murmuring low in his ear “go up on the bed”. David wasn’t sure if he could actually make his body work enough to comply, but he managed to push himself up on his hands and knees and crawl farther up the bed. Sutan took his own pants off and crawled up behind David who was waiting for him like a puppy, panting and on all fours. He reached out and touched David’s tanned skin again, wanting to go slow and enjoy him as much as he could. Sutan leaned forward and wrapped one hand around David’s neck as he pressed his cock into David’s backside, making both of them close their eyes and moan in unison. Sutan loved to tease, and he wanted to hear David beg one more time.

“Tell me what you want” Sutan breathed in his ear. His cock was growing harder as he rubbed it against David’s ass.

David was extremely horny but becoming impatient. “Bitch you know what I want” he snapped as he pushed his hips back.

The hand around David’s neck tightened ever so slightly making him gasp. “Tell me.” Sutan growled as he pushed forward into David again, not happy with his little outburst. When Sutan was in a dominant mood like this he needed complete submission, but he couldn’t deny that David’s smart mouth and momentary insolence turned him on.

“Fuck me” David whimpered softly

“Again.”

David hissed as he felt Sutan’s cock pressing against his entrance “ah Sutan, fuck me!” he begged. Both men cried out as Sutan finally pressed himself inside. All the teasing and building pressure released in that first stroke.

Sutan slowly worked himself all the way inside, groaning at the feeling of David around him. “God…you’re so tight babe” Sutan groaned as he leaned forward further, gripping his head board and pushing himself even deeper. He squeezed his eyes shut, concentrating on not coming too quickly. Sutan heard David moan as he began to fuck him at a slow, steady pace, his own breathing laboured. David moaned Sutan’s name as he felt himself being stretched just past the point of pain, but that pain was overtaken by the immense pleasure.

They continued this way for a while, moaning and gasping as Sutan’s steady thrusts increased in speed. Sutan’s hand reached down to wind into David’s hair, and he closed his eyes and smiled as he relished in the feeling of his cock inside his friend. He’d thought about David like this since the day they met, never expecting to get the chance to act on his fantasies, and definitely not expecting it to exceed his expectations. He couldn’t believe how good David felt, and in this moment he knew this wasn’t just going to be a one-time thing. He didn’t realize he’d slowed down his thrusts until he heard David call out his name.

“Sutan! God Sutan don’t stop” David moaned as he bucked his hips back against him.

Sutan snapped back to reality. He pushed down on David’s back and forced his upper body down into the mattress as he mounted further on top of him. “You want more? Say it.”

David noted that this seemed to be a common theme and he willingly played along. “More Sutan” David whined for him “Harder.”

Sutan smirked and obliged. With both hands on the headboard, the new angle above allowed him to push deeper inside. Sutan’s hips worked overtime as he fucked David fast and hard, and he enjoyed all the little sounds and curses escaping from David’s mouth too. Sutan groaned, he could feel himself getting close so he reached underneath them to find David’s erection, throbbing in his hand. He stroked David in time with his own thrusts making him cry in pleasure.

As Sutan felt himself get closer he leaned down and kissed and nipped at David’s ear, groaning in his deep, throaty voice “Come for me David.”

As if he was waiting for permission, David cried out and released himself into Sutan’s hand that continued to stroke him through his orgasm. Feeling David’s walls clench even tighter around him was Sutan’s undoing as he finally allowed himself to come inside David with a low groan, filling him. The two of them rode out the waves of pleasure before collapsing on the bed together.

They laid together in complete exhaustion, and for a moment David wondered if he should leave or not. Sutan seemed to sense his uneasiness as he reached out to push David’s hair off his sweat-covered forehead. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“Do you want me to leave?” David asked hesitantly

“Leave?” Sutan almost looked offended. “Where are you gonna go at this time of night? Plus you’re fucking wasted!”

“I’m not wast-“

“You can stay the night David, its fine.” Sutan reassured him.

“Are you sure?” David was still hesitant, he didn’t want things to get weird between them.

“Yes! I’m sure. If you leave I won’t have anybody to cuddle with, and everyone knows that’s like the…..third best part of having sex!” David didn’t ask what the first two were. He was still a bit shocked at Sutan’s complete personality switch from dominant and controlling to now wanting to cuddle. But he didn’t complain, instead he laid his head down on Sutan’s chest and focused on the rising and falling of his chest and his slowing heartbeat, eventually drifting off as Sutan caressed his back.

They’d have a lot to figure out tomorrow.

[fightevilandthengetblownup]

FIC COMP: AUs Ahoy

#1 - Role Reversal: Where Hunters Are Shadows, And Shadows Are Hunters

The list was on the refrigerator as per usual, the cute little moose magnet holding it up proclaiming to be saying ‘hello’ from Lake Superior perched just above the first of the names and locations, and it didn’t seem like the stream of hunts and monsters misbehaving were letting up any as the weather was starting to cool down. The magnet had been holding up the 'chow list’ since the rugaru hunt on Isle Royale, and neither had really thought to find something a little less ironic than a creature bidding hello before listing those to die.

Blowing a breath out through her mouth in a huff, making the strands of blonde hair that had caught on her lips flick out before resettling around her face, Jo shrugs and rolls her shoulders to loosen the muscles before truly focussing upon who she’d be tailing along for a bite next. “So.. something that might be demonic near Detroit?” She calls out, pushing her hair back from her face as some falls back across her cheeks again, and tugs the sheet off of the fridge. He was always very thorough with her hunts, that much she was sure. “You want that first?”

“If you’re free of course,” the familiar voice calls out from the den, concern bleeding in amongst the tone as she folds the paper up and pockets it. It wouldn’t be hard to organise it to be able to do this one for him, as the only things she’d had planned for the week were to relax around the house, take care of the animals while he was away and to lay down yet another set of rules about her siblings dropping around the house. They’d almost been there when he’d gotten home. “Otherwise I can take on some others in that area instead, if you don’t want to go near demons, or somewhere like that…”

Jo smiles softly to herself before tucking the list into her jeans pocket and moving into the lounge, popping up behind him to wrap her arms around his shoulders where he was sitting over the back of the couch. “God you’re such a worrier. I’ll be fine - in and out faster than your little list there will be, that’s for sure.” Pressing her lips against his scruffy cheek, something he only did when he was planning to act as a reporter and not something more professional, she reaches past him to tap the papers spread across his lap. “You going to be away long on this one? Did you want some help? I could always speed it up a littl-”

“No! …No, Jo, I’ll be fine…” Jack’s shocked, almost terrified if the jolt of fear she couldn’t help but feel pop up from him, response was expected. Long fingers wrapped around her smaller hands, as he turned to look at her dead on. She didn’t need, or really ever actually, read his emotions to know what the concern in the light blues and twisted lip corners were about. Ever since the other hunter, tall, dark and handsome with a fearsome reputation with a razor blade and knives, had shown up and nabbed her for his sadistic play - he’d been living in fear that the same thing would happen over to her again. His thumbs rubbed across the top of her hands as he tentatively leant in to press their foreheads together, adding quietly, “You’ve got your list, I’ve got mine. Okay?”

Nodding in agreement with him, she smothered her own fears about the dangers she’d been putting herself into by being around and with him and in the small, slip of a girl body she’s taken for her own with amusement at his concern, rolling over the top of the couch to cuddle up beside him. It wasn’t like she hadn’t dealt with hunters before. Though they were usually of the monstrous variety considering most of her time spent in Purgatory before the gates opened, being looked down upon by the more ferocious of the other inhabitants. But if it made him feel better (and her, though she’d rather be there to keep him safe than side-lined) then Jo wasn’t going to argue.

There was the typical pause, where he would try to figure out what she was thinking and rolling her eyes about to dissuade her from ignoring his requests, before the hunter sighs and wraps an arm around her instead. “I’m just going to find you hiding in my trunk, aren’t I?” There was humor in his words, but the look her directed her was anything but happy. It wasn’t that she couldn’t understand - his last hunting partner had died while they were chasing some demonic trail just before the pair of them had met, and her being trapped by that crazed hunter Michael had shaken him all over again - but she was a big girl, and she’d been protecting herself longer than he’d been born.

“Like I could fit into the trunk of that thing, and you know I get car sick.” Rubbing her nose against his jaw line, she can’t help but think how unlike the others of his kind Jack was. She’d seen, quite intimately and in excrutiating detail, the monster of a pick-up that her captor had driven, and the flashy purple Mercedes that the flirty brunette huntress friend of his drove, and the troves of old non-descript muscle cars or fuel-guzzlers that other hunters would take out. And yet he was the proud owner of a small little hybrid that he’d painstakingly carved runes, sigils and wardings into beneath the faded grey paint job and the least organised assortment of hunting tools hidden under the liftable back seat compartments. “I’d just pop up in your hotel room when you call to tell me you got there safely and check up on Amon. And Nana.”

“I’m fairly certain that your tiny pixie self could find a way to squeeze in there." That at least got a chuckle out of him, the feel of his fingers running through her hair getting a sound very close to a purr out of her lips as the scowl slowly faded back from his face. If he kept looking so worried all the time he’d get wrinkles. /More wrinkles/, she corrected herself, smoothing out his forehead with her thumb as the small jolt at the idea that they’d appear more and more, frowning or not, until they wouldn’t much sooner than she’d wish pushed her to stop thinking about that. Jo’d deal with it when it happened, hopefully some seventy years on from some natural, painless cause than his being out in the field and her not being their to protect him like she could. He must have noticed her flickered glance to the few crows feet starting to form around his eyes, because his fingers tugged a lock of her hair gently before continuing. "Damn right I call you, you’d just show up regardless if I didn’t.”

“Which is really why you should just give up on keepin’ me away, hun..” Jo murmurs, leaning in quickly to press her lips against the fading bruising she’d left on his neck the last time he’d headed off for a hunt. The comment about her size would have rankled her the wrong way if she hadn’t selected it for just that reason. Her brothers were much more intimidating than she’d ever been size wise in their true forms, but Jo loved to see her prey learn not to underestimate her despite the smaller size of the sprite she’d taken over when her first body had been almost torn apart and incinerated by Lilith when she was on a power bender. She’d learnt since then, and the passing bad fairy that popped up on Jack’s radar had just the right quality to her than Jo’d felt right at home inside - even if the sprite didn’t share her opinion. That same hunt was how she met Eleanor and Shada Visyak though, and it had taken his word to save her from having to find another body all over again with only a shot to the shoulder to come from it. “Just give in and run away on the road in your little hybrid. Pack little Amon up in a doggie carrier and Nana’ll catch up to us when she can.”

The hunter does roll his eyes at that, kissing her back gently before tapping a finger to her nose with one hand. His other tickles at the underneath of her knee as he moves to stand. “Now we can’t do that - you’d be carsick and miserable the whole time, and I like knowing that after a long, hard case that there’s a beautiful woman waiting at home for me at the end of the day.” His words got a flush out of her as her lap was filled quickly with the slightly ageing corgi while he brushed off his hands on his jeans. “Speaking of though, today has been very long and very hard for me…” The suggestion was there as Jo looked up, smirk blooming across her face in reaction to the uncertain hopefulness on his own, both letting out a bit of a laugh before her hand reached out for his and the shadow-girl spirited them away upstairs to prepare him for his next job the following morning.

#2 - Adorable High School AU

If there was one thing Jo had always hated more than primary school, it would have to be high school. Even as a child she’d been known to exclaim rather loudly that she hated it without ever having been. Though she’d been told to wait and see and of all the enjoyment she’d have there, it was already her Junior year and she was ready to stab her pen into someone’s eye - be it her own or someone else’s.

That was of course until the bell rang on the start of the second semester when a dark haired, fair boy approached her in their drama lesson, offering to help her with her costume and make up. Oddly enough, unlike the others in the class who’d looked at him weirdly for offering, Jo just smiled and offered him her tube of red lipstick, commenting about how there was no way she could ever get it just right. In return she got a smile that would knock anyone else off their feet and a story about his younger sister, Shada, who was a big fan of dress ups.

It took barely a minute for him to get her hair, lips and eyes under control, much better than the black congested globs she usually ended up with around her eyes and none of the flyaway's as usual. Brushing her hair back, Jo turned back to him, looking curiously at him as she asked how she looked. All she got as a response was a rather intense gaze and a quiet murmur of the name Jack Grayson, otherwise known as Grey with an ‘e’.

—

“Jo, there’s someone down here looking for you! And he seems extremely under-age.” The call from her mother interrupted the Playstation game she and the only other girl in the school who loathed everything as much as she did were playing. It wasn’t a normal occurrence as most of the people who came by from her school had the decency of not acknowledging that they knew her, and especially none of the boys did. “Hurry your slow ass down here, sweetie, before he runs off.”

Pausing the game the blonde girl hurries down the back set of stairs three at a time, her what-you-could-call-her-friend Bela trailing behind her at a more sedate pace. Reaching the bottom of the stairs and stepping out into the bar where a few of the hunters hanging around were eyeing the newcomer interestedly, Jo can’t help the bright smile that burst across her face. “Hey, what are you doing here?”

The awkward look the blue eyed boy gave the room spoke volumes of how out of place he really was, though he looked almost flushed and as though he was suffering from hayfever if the slight red, wetness around his eyes was any indication. “Hi Jo. I was wondering if you wanted to, um, help me with a little project I was planning on doing.” The fumble and the way his eyes flickered towards her mother as he asks her to help and mentions it’s a project makes Jo’s eyes light up.

Nodding her head emphatically, Jo waves Ellen back to the bar as she threads her fingers through the dark haired boy’s, tugging him out towards the entrance. “I would. I really, really would Grey.” Moving outside and towards the back of the bar out past the car park and towards her favourite run down barn from when the area was farmed land, any thoughts of her not-quite-friend vanish from her mind as the boy besides her on the hay bale starts smiling and explaining his plan.

—

To: Jo From: Grey | Flash my teacher?

To: Grey From: Jo | im never watching 10thingsihateaboutyou with you again

To: Jo From: Grey | I’ll make it worth your while…

To: Grey From: Jo | the only way that is possible is if it somehow involves chocolate, sex and bruce willis

To: Jo From: Grey | I will see what I can do

To: Jo From: Grey | Bruce is a moron and is seemingly unavailable. I will continue working

To: Jo From: Grey | I got a pack of M&Ms off the girl behind me. And by got I mean…

To: Jo From: Grey | So I’ve got you chocolate, but Bruce won’t come for the other two. Anything I could trade for getting out of here instead?

To: Grey From: Jo | you had me at m+ms

To: Jo From: Grey | I’m starting a new religion. We worship your breasts and your unending willingness to break us out of detention after our plans go wrong. Sacrificial chocolates will be offered on a weekly basis in order for the bountiful goodness to continue saving us from damnation in eternal detention.

—

“Everyone is just going ga-ga over Prom, Grey. I don’t understand it at all.” Jo whines as she shifts to stand and start pacing beside where he’s sitting at his desk. He’d taken up an extra arts course and the work load was slowly eating into their friend time, so the blonde had done the only thing reasonable - she began coming to pester and roll about in his bed playing Gameboy until he would finally give up and join her.

Except today was different, and as the dark haired boy works at his sketch book at his desk, Jo paces back and forth beside his bed, running her hand through her bangs and shifting uncomfortably. “I don’t understand it, though. Everyone else is going crazy about it, but honestly if I wanted to spend the night with some guy’s arms around me while some cheesy music was playing and eventually fall asleep in the same bed, worn out and tired after strenuous activity of sorts, without my parents knowing then I’d just stay in with you.”

She would have heard the pencil stopping when she explained herself if she were listening, before he turns around to look at her and her back-and-forth walking curiously. Shifting back around, he rushes to fill in some sections of his drawing, occasionally looking discretely at her before turning around with his sketch book in hand, giving up on being careful when it’s clear Jo pays no attention to him as he continues to draw her likeness in almost pefect detail.

“I just don’t see the point, and I feel bad for people who don’t have the kind of life that we have, you know? Where they need Prom to feel validated or special.” Huffing, Jo turns to pin him with a look, barely noticing the fixed gaze and smile of a day dreamer. “Let’s have our own celebration of the end of the year, hey Grey? We’ll borrow Mom’s car, drive to the beach, fall asleep in the back tray of the truck and just… do our own thing instead of what everyone else says, okay?”

Not even waiting for a response, Jo ducks in to press a kiss against the boy’s cheek, shooting him a smile before dashing away to head back to her own house to talk to her mother. Completely missing the dazed and extremely pleased flush building on his cheeks or the almost perfect drawing of her staring back up at him with her warm eyes, meeting the fake gaze with just as much joy and unrequited, unreturned and unspoken love as he gives her.

#3 - DJ’s Introduction that nobody ever wants to read again cause gross

It was a hunt gone completely wrong. Like, completely and utterly wrong. Wrong to an unimaginable level. As unimaginable a level that would find Jo pacing back and forth across the motel room floor, occasionally glancing at her exact double in every physical way stretching out on the bed in front of her in some borrowed underwear and her green jacket only. The only difference between the two were their attitude and as the blonde looks across at the other she can’t help but wonder if this is how Grey felt when faced with Gray the first time as the other woman props herself up and stares back at her.

“Yeah, you weren’t expecting this when you went after that cursed item, did you?” The not-Jo smirks up at her, a shocking jolt running through her as she recognises the look and wonders if that’s how she always looks when she’s feeling superior. “You go on a hunt for an object where everyone whose owned it has shown up with a complete personality change for the worst…”

“And this isn’t what I thought it would be. Yeah, I heard you the first time.” Jo snaps back at her, very aware now that it must be much like a Bodysnatchers moment where only one of them is going to leave this room alive, and looking across at the darkly glinting eyes on the other her, she couldn’t help but have a dreadful feeling it would be her not leaving. “So what’s the game plan here, we duel it out and you take my spot? Ruin my life? Destroy me completely? And then vanish letting me come home to Hell?”

The blonde pushes her way off of the bed to approach her, getting in the way of her pacing way too easily for Jo’s comfort. Her face was still twisted into a small, knowing smirk, like she could predict her thoughts and given she was seemingly her evil-doppleganger that was highly likely. “Pretty close actually, Jo. Or, maybe given you are you and I am you - I happen to know better than to duke you out for your spot and would rather just go our separate ways after a little battle of wills rather than a fight to the almost death.”

Jo frowns at that, the smirk and the way the other’s eyes raked over her like a piece of meat makes her shudder and take a step back towards the wall. “Battle of wills? If you’re me, then we’re never going to let someone come away a winner.” Her brows crease further at the way her double steps towards her, planting one hand against the wall on either side of her hips with a deliberateness Jo usually keeps firmly under wraps.

“You are too right. Which is why we’re goin’ to do somethin’ where we both win, and yet neither of us need to concede defeat.” It was the lick of her lips, her identically formed, pink lips, which set the hair on the back of Jo’s neck on edge as the other leant in, eyes staring straight into one another from their equal height. Licking her own in response, she tries to move though the other is as strong as her and just continues smirking before she does the unpredictable and kisses her harshly. There was something infinitely weird about it as their lips move and teeth knock slightly from the roughness before the doppleganger pulls back. “You and I fuck, and I’ll leave your little lifestyle alone. Unlike the rest of the people cursed by that little mirror. Otherwise, I’ll cut your throat and go play master and slave with our housemate.”

Jo blinks in surprise, looking her copy up and down for a few moments trying not to cringe at the idea of another woman again and of one exactly like her, before it turns into a full blown gasp as the other blonde grabs her by the hips and shoves her towards the bed. She’s pinned down easily enough due to her surprise with the other woman crawling up her, smirk in place as she tugs and pulls at Jo’s clothes not giving her a say about it any more. “What are you do-” Her cry is muffled as the other woman shoves her face down onto the bed and tugs her arms behind her back roughly. Bucking up trying to free herself, Jo stills at the feel of rope circling her bare wrists tightly before trying to move quicker.

“Shh, shh Jo. I’m not goin’ to hurt you. Not really. I might make you really uncomfortable and make that pretty mouth of ours earn it’s place on our faces but all in all you’re goin’ to be fine.” None of that was reassuring to Jo as she rolls onto her back, staring back up at the other blonde as she rips apart the worn-thin fabric of her t-shirt and shoves her bra up above her breasts exposing them to the air and rough attention of hands. She’s already completely panicked, blood running high and mind a blank focussing purely on the rough texture binding her hands together and the harsh, almost painful hands twisting, tugging and rubbing at her breasts and nipples. It was a wash, the other her’s voice barely registering as she simultaneously pulls at her wrists and pushes towards the hands on her chest after a few moments, a frightened cry coming out of her mouth through a gasp.

She isn’t sure when it happens, but she snaps out of it when she feels the air brushing over her legs and the flimsy covering over her still in place before her legs are jerked apart by small, thin fingers at her ankles before they move upwards. Pulling herself up enough to see what’s going on with aching stomach muscles, Jo blinks in surprise at the wide brown eyes looking back up at her from between her thighs. Neither woman drops their gaze as the free one reaches a finger through a small hole near the top of her worn panties and tugs the fabric apart with one swift  tear before showing the finger inside of her with no warning. Crying out in surprise, she drops back, her hands still tugging at her wrists as the blind panic sets in alongside the feeling of fast, hard thrusts into her by very familiar fingers.

Her brain was overloading as it happens, not sure what feeling to focus on - the terror still thrumming through her body from the memory of the last time she was tied with rope, or the waves of pleasure she was feeling from the attention from the other woman. As a strangled moan escapes her lips, Jo’s double’s fingers slide out of her and she feels the rough long end of the rope tugging between her ass cheeks before the familiar feel of vibrations start up against her clit. Sighing and twisting her fingers into the covers below her, even as the tug of the rope brings tears to her eyes, Jo jerks her eyes open when she feels the bed shift and the coarse edges of the thick rope pressing all the way against her in a line from navel to mid back.

It wasn’t until the lightly tanned skin of her thighs comes into sight beside her head that she blinks away the tears running from her eyes at the memories flooding over the top of the pleasure. “What the fuck do you want?” Jo knew it was redundant though she tries to sound forceful through the tears and moans, especially when she could feel the brush of skin against her chin as she looks up her own body to her clones lustful and gleeful eyes. A tug on her wrists makes the tears spring up again as a moan slips from between her lips as the feel of the rope slides along her already wet cunt and presses the bullet tighter against her clit.

“I wanna ride our face. And if you do well, like you really should know how to, I will give you a little reward with a tug of my hand, ‘kay?” Without waiting for an answer the other her slips her other leg over to the other side of her head and takes a firm grasp of her hair tugging her up so her mouth was against her. A jerk of her other hand has Jo moaning again even as the idea of what she’s about to do makes her shudder and want to scream before blinking what few tears remained away and closing her mind down from what was happening. Flicking her tongue out to slide from back to front of the other woman’s already wet cunt, she ends pressing against her clit. The scrape of rope and building vibrations against her own encourages Jo to roll her tongue against the double’s before sucking gently a few times.

Another tug of rope between her legs comes as the other woman presses her hips harshly against her face, her own back arching as her arms groan in pain and she lets out a whimper as another flash of fear runs through her before she forces herself to refocus, biting gently before she trails her tongue back downwards. After a second, Jo rubs her nose against the blonde’s clit as she circles her entrance with her tongue before thrusting into her. Every few times, as she alternates her tongues attention between clit and thrusts while controlling her desire to scream, cry, moan or whimper underneath her copy, the other tugs the rope up against her before letting it back out. This keeps going even as her wrists and back begin to hurt making her scrunch her eyes up in pain while the taste of her-almost-self on her tongue causes her to shudder until a harder tug on the rope dislodges the toy against her, leaving only the thick, painful rope to rub between her folds and against her clit with a shriek.

The other woman seems to notice but rather than moving to fix it just tugs Jo’s head up harder against her as she presses down again, now tugging and releasing the rope much quicker as the pain mixes with the pleasure and pressure of it. If it weren’t for the previous attention on her, Jo was certain that as the woman above her came she wouldn’t have matched her as she too climaxes around the rough rope still sliding between her legs. It felt so dirty to her as the other continues to rock down on her through her orgasm that she’s close to tears again as she shifts off from her and uses Jo’s own hair to wipe her thighs before dropping the strands back on the bed. She isn’t sure if it’s cum or blood between her legs as she blinks back tears again when the not-her shoves her onto her front and reaches for the rope at her wrists finally.

Her own laugh fills the room, or rather what sounds like her own laugh, as Jo curls in on herself when the other pulls the rope away, barely holding back the sobs and shakes she wants to. “Well, at least neither of us are dead. And obviously your little monster is teaching you a thing or too about what we like, hmm Jo?” The words ring through her ears though she doesn’t acknowledge them, merely hugging her aching wrists against her chest as she presses her legs together and upwards. “Come on, Jo, sweetie it wasn’t that bad was it? I’m fairly sure you enjoyed it as much as me. And now we can say it’s a stale mate and you can go clean your wounds while I go avoid having to live your dull ass life. See ya round Jojo, don’t get out of practice, whatever you do.” With a hard, almost bruising, slap to her ass as farewell, Jo can’t help curling further in on herself as the doppelganger leaves. Where she’s going the hunter doesn’t know but all she can bring herself to think about at the moment was not crying again as she still feels a phantom rope around her wrists and a tug between her legs.

[borispav]

Do you think there is a reason why Theo & Boris didn’t recconect when they’re older later in the book? Yes, there are still obvious feelings - of whatever they had when they were younger - but I can honestly see it only on Theo’s side. Also, the quote abt Theo’s and Kitsy’s souls not mixing together that Boris says, do you think it’s supposed to be connected to Theo and Boris and the ‘thing’ they had back in Vegas?

I guess it depends on what you mean by ‘reconnect’. If you’re referring to them reconnecting emotionally, then I actually disagree. I do think they resurface something together as adults (a small spark from their adolescence, a loyalty, a magnetism), and that the lingering existence of those feelings is actually a subtle, but ongoing, theme in the last quarter of the book—especially in Amsterdam. Yes, their relationship as adults is different, in a multitude of ways, from how it is when they were younger (far more muted and subdued, with time and distance having driven major wedges between them and their ability to communicate, their willingness to cross lines), but the core essence of it is still very much there, saturating the majority of their third-act interactions. It’s almost entirely spoken through action and body language though; the smaller things (like Boris’s unfettered tactility, that pull to be near Theo, to be physical, still present, untouched by age) and the bigger ones (Boris signaling (!via their old silent language!) for Theo to run away and save himself during the garage shootout, and, concurrently, Theo being unable to leave Boris alone, despite the danger, as well as Theo ultimately picking up a gun and actually killing someone on instinct in order to protect the two of them, in order to save Boris who was injured and vulnerable on the floor). Their tie to each other is only further fortified, if anything, in adulthood. Through that near-death experience (and through the both literal and figurative release of the painting) they become bound by blood, crime, truth, and secrecy. The sheer monumental weight of this all— as well as the choice to have Boris present in the very last few pages of the book—to me, suggests that their relationship (and correspondence) with each other is unlikely to die out any time soon.

And as for only seeing this come from Theo’s side, I actually felt the opposite when reading. 

If anything, I thought Boris was the (mostly) unchanged one, that Boris was the one who—despite brushing off what they did in Vegas—still seemed unable to resist reverting back to his old self and habits (practically jumping on Theo in the airport, proposing the idea of them working together like it’d be an adventure, casually affectionate and flirty as ever). For me, Theo came across as the one who was trying to pull away, the one who had drawn an invisible line between them at some unspoken point in time. You can tell, right from their first reunion, that adult Theo doesn’t really see the two of them as belonging to the same category of people anymore. I mean, he struggled with that as a kid too (constantly wondering how he became friends with “someone like” Boris), but in adulthood it’s far more pronounced. He observes and interacts with Boris from a cautious, self-instilled, distance. He acts, at times, as if Boris is a source of danger, as if he (as Boris even points out) is a “criminal”, someone who might ruin his carefully curated life and drag him back to the wasteland of his teen years. He’s thoroughly convinced himself that he’s the superior adult, and consequently judges/distrusts nearly everything Boris says to him as a result (descriptions of his job, wife, sobriety—and even attendance to the engagement party—are all doubted and met with condescension). And then there’s also that conversation they have in the hotel, once Boris returns. A large part of that interaction is Boris trying to reach out, trying to talk to Theo, not only about the painting, but about them, about what Theo meant to him and what Theo still means to him. But Theo, for the majority of Boris’s visit, is almost completely shut off and detached from all of it. He likens the deadened way he feels around Boris at the time to how he used to feel around his dad, which is a pretty steep and irregular association for him to make between the two.

That being said, even then I still don’t think that anything (at its root) is really one-sided about their relationship as adults. There’s a deep rift between them, for sure, and a sense of dubiousness that definitely breeds hostility, but all of that is pretty normal given what they both had gone through (both pre and post shooting), as well as the unresolved note they’d departed on in Vegas. All in all, I think the way their reunion is treated—the fact that both of them are needed in order to move the story to its close, that their feelings for each other are demonstrated as being strong enough to withstand the strain of time, and that they are each other’s agents-of-rescue during the novel’s most perilous point—serves to show that they are inextricably invested in one another in a shared instinctual manner.

Lastly, about the quote: I think that its general, surface-level, purpose is aimed toward Kitsey and the shallow, uninvolved, nature of their engagement, as that’s the immediate, obvious, example—the negation which exemplifies what that soulful kind of love is not. However, by virtue, that also prompts us to consider what is an example of that bond, in which case there are two other clear contenders: Pippa and Boris. Pippa is the second obvious option here, but in truth the only reason we’re urged to think that is because that’s how Theo has framed their relationship in his head, that’s how he wistfully, and unrealistically, perceives their bond. In actuality, however, Pippa is not the one he’s tied up enough in to feel like he must “stay away” from. His behavior toward her is actually another antipode to the type of love Boris was describing, as Theo has no problem throwing himself headfirst into Pippa’s life, her sphere of being. The only people that actually keep themselves distanced from each other (both physically and emotionally) out of caution are Boris and Theo. They, indirectly but very much functionally, demonstrate the psychology behind that advice, and have also been simultaneously putting it into practice since Vegas. So yes, it could certainly be applied to them.

[umino-miyuki]

some thoughts on Miyuki and Choko from Happy, with comparisons to Monster because I still find it hilarious that they were running at the same time.

Umino Miyuki vs. Kenzo Tenma

I’ve always thought there were a lot of similarities between Miyuki and Tenma. black-haired protagonists who are constantly persecuted but persevere nonetheless. this post includes a chart drawn by Urasawa comparing his protagonists based on selfishness and innate genius. both Miyuki and Tenma are described as geniuses, though apparently Miyuki is even more naturally perfect at tennis than Tenma is at doctoring.

both characters suffer from “more talented younger sibling” issues, though looking at family relationships is where the comparisons between the two begin to fall apart a bit. according to Another Monster, Tenma was favored by his father over his older brother for his talent, while it seems like Miyuki’s brother simply felt insecure because of her skill. Miyuki’s parents are portrayed as 100% caring and supportive, while Tenma’s mother was harsh and critical and his father mercenary. 

Miyuki’s brother’s get rich quick schemes led to the death of her parents, causing her to blame herself and quit tennis. on the other hand, Tenma’s father pressured him into taking over his business, which would have been an insult to his brother. rather than follow through with this, Tenma chose to move to Germany and remain estranged from his family, despite his brother’s attempts to reconcile him with their father. 

this brings up an interesting difference between Tenma and Miyuki. both characters have magnetic personalities, influence those around them, and end up gathering somewhat of a following. however, Tenma leaves people behind--his family, Eva, Dieter, Nina, etc.--while Miyuki runs after people, no matter what they’ve done to her.

despite both of them preferring to carry their burdens alone, they end up inspiring altruism in others. but their actual goals are quite different, as Miyuki is specifically fighting for the sake of her family, while Tenma feels it’s his responsibility to kill Johan. this may be why Miyuki is ranked as far more selfless than Tenma. 

another difference is that I think Tenma is a lot more passive as a character than Miyuki. while they both suffer constantly, Tenma takes everything without protest, at least after a certain point. he’s described as a martyr several times, but I think of him more as an atoner--he feels as though everything that happens in the story is his fault, and thus the bad that comes to him is something he has to accept.

on the other hand, Miyuki stands up for herself just as much as she stands up for others. she argues with the ref when he makes a bad call, refuses to take insults, and never allows herself to be bought. in this way, she’s arguably more of an active protagonist than Tenma.

Ryugasaki Choko vs. Johan Liebert

then we have our manipulative blond antagonists. beyond those attributes, however, Choko and Johan don’t have too much in common.

while Johan was shaped by extreme deprivation, Choko’s villainy is rooted in privilege. both Johan and Choko may view others as worthless, but Choko goes a step further and views herself as superior, stemming from her wealthy upbringing. unlike Monster which focuses on how trauma can lead to violence and suffering, in Happy, the source of bad behavior is entitlement. Johan is a very complex case psychologically, but Choko is a textbook example of a narcissist. in her mind, she’s deserving of the best, and she’ll do whatever it takes to get her way.

Johan manipulates by understanding others, feeding on their needs, while Choko is adept at manipulating public image, boosting her own reputation and running smear campaigns against those she wants to destroy. both characters have a tendency to target specific victims, but in very different ways. Johan doesn’t hate Tenma or Nina--in fact, they’re some of the only people he seems to have positive feelings towards. on the other hand, Choko hates Miyuki from the very beginning. 

I’ve argued before that Johan doesn’t lack empathy at all, but in my opinion, Choko does. she can’t understand why people like Miyuki, and it drives her crazy. Johan understands altruism and helping behavior perfectly well, and can exploit it to his advantage, but Choko can only think of it as inexplicable and stupid. 

when Choko believes Miyuki prostituted herself to get money, she admits defeat, because doing anything for money is something she can understand. it’s only when Miyuki perseveres despite torment and fights for what she thinks is right that Choko is enraged. near the beginning of the story, Miyuki doesn’t recognize Choko, and Choko assumes she pretended not to know her as an insult--assigning Miyuki her own motives. in fact, almost all the things Choko spreads as rumors about Miyuki are things she herself did. 

this is standard behavior for narcissistic people. they believe themselves to be perfect, can’t understand those who are different from themselves, and therefore believe that difference is a sign of that something is wrong or lesser. further, narcissistic people have huge but unstable egos--they have to put others down in order to feel good about themselves and avoid facing their own flaws by projecting them on to others. in contrast, Johan totally lacks an ego, leaving him with nothing to do but act out the programming others put into him. 

beyond looking down on Miyuki for being poor, Choko is also motivated by jealousy, which brings us to her other main victim, Keiichiro. 

while Johan sees Nina as a reflection of himself, Choko views Keiichiro as property. she enjoys tormenting him almost as much as Miyuki, but for different reasons. she wants to stamp Miyuki into the ground, but with Keiichiro, she’s trying to control him. 

despite her mother’s wishes, Choko is interested in him as a romantic partner. she thinks she wants him because he’s rich and handsome, but as the story goes on, this motive is complicated. as villains, both Choko and Johan are set up as totally uncaring, but it’s ultimately revealed that both are capable of having attachments to others.

after Keiichiro fails to become a professional tennis player, Choko decides to dump him and look for other prospects, a very common behavior for narcissists known as “discarding.” however, she continues to manipulate him and attempt to get sole power over him. 

she isolates him from everyone and tells him that he’ll always have her, in a move common to abusive people. near the end of the story, his lack of reciprocation begins to bother her more and more, and she eventually realizes she’s actually in love with him. 

I find it interesting how Choko was totally unaware of her feelings, even though from the beginning, her hatred of Miyuki was rooted in the fact that Keiichiro cared about her--not just that she was getting in the way of a potentially lucrative relationship. unlike Tenma and Miyuki, who are fairly in touch with themselves, Johan and Choko are both lashing out without being aware of their own motivations. 

Story Trajectory

I find both Happy and Monster interesting for their hero/villain dynamics and for how they’re ultimately resolved. Johan is set up as a monster who has to be killed, and Choko is so utterly horrid that the reader is on the edge of their seat, waiting for her to face repercussions. in both cases, Urasawa subverts expectations by moving the goal away from punishing the villain. 

just as Johan ultimately moves on with his life, Choko decides to stop being a malignant narcissist. her character development is really interesting when considering what narcissistic people are like. most of the damage they do isn’t from their egos--it’s from the way they cover up their actions and true personalities. Choko being openly rude and petty is far less dangerous than when she spent all her time pretending to be something she wasn’t. 

in both stories, Urasawa gives both his heroes and villains arcs, and in fact, allows his villains to change more than his heroes. Johan and Choko try to change their protagonists, and so Tenma and Miyuki’s refusal to give up who they are is the point of their heroic journey. no matter what Johan tries, he can’t turn Tenma into a killer, and no matter what Miyuki goes through, she always finds a way to be happy. and their steadfastness is what sparks the change in the antagonists. 

Postscript: Umino Miyuki vs. Nina Fortner

Tenma is a character who doesn’t seem to care what happens to himself in the end, but Miyuki is someone who fights for her own happiness to the bitter end. in this way, she’s more similar to Nina Fortner than Tenma. in Another Monster, Lipsky describes Nina as someone who despite being hurt, “still believed in the possibility of happiness in her life. She never gave up; she kept seeking it. She really knew, instinctually, that her life had to have a happy ending.” this could just as easily have been said about Miyuki, and their character designs are almost exactly the same except for their hair. I just love how many crossovers there are between both works!