#but also this is actually how i think it went down

[ckret2]

I might tweak some details later (jewelry? take the ribbon off the bow?) but I've about got a Scalene design I like. The lipstick is really the centerpiece of the design. Now let's infodump! With more art!

🔺 Notice her lines are a a little curvy. It's not for artistic effect. She's got a Fictional Polygon Physical Disorder that makes her bendier than she should be—meaning, among other things, sides that curve and flex.

🔺 It's also the kind of condition with symptoms that are romanticized by people who don't grok that it's a debilitating medical condition. Sides that curve and flex? How exotic! This went to her head in the wrong ways.

🔺 Bill was born with the same condition. You know how squishy and blobby he was as a baby? Thaaat's genetic! He was a lot squishier than most babies! And, consequently, more adorable.

🔺Scalene dreamed of being a famous super model. Was actually a teen beauty queen at mid-tier beauty pageants. She thinks it's always somebody else's fault she wasn't more successful.

🔺 She took Bill to his first baby beauty pageant the day he was born. He did, in fact, have a Best Baby Ever award presented to him by the mayor, but to be fair he was only competing against like 6 other babies and who's going to withhold a trophy from a newborn on his birthday? Anyway the 6-12 month group and 12-24 month groups also each had a Best Baby Ever award.

🔺 This was an absolutely bonkers thing for Scalene to do.

🔺 What's that small scrunkly thing doing at a pageant, he can't even see color yet.

🔺 Their fictional squishy medical condition doesn't just accidentally make shapes cute. It's the kind of condition that affects just about all parts of the body: sides won't stay straight, poor muscle tone resulting in instability & weakness, poor motor coordination & clumsiness, back aches & pains (well, triangles don't have "backs." side aches?), easily dislocated joints, and increasingly skewed sides with age. Just about everyone in Scalene's family is born equilateral and ends up extremely scalene after young adulthood. The rest of her family have normal relationships with their condition, she's the only one who's weird about it

🔺 She was very rough on her body in pursuit of pageantry success, but her physical symptoms & associated chronic pain got a lot worse due to having a kid; she had to retire from pageantry for good. She doesn't blame Bill for this at all. Out loud, to his face. (If she hadn't been so rough on herself in pageants, having a kid probably wouldn't have impacted her health this much. She doesn't consider this.)

🔺 She's weirdly intent on seeing Bill become the success she wasn't. He's her little golden child, he deserves to be seen as the greatest! He'll show them how great he is for mommy, won't he? He won't let mommy down, will he? When he's very young, she takes him to child pageants—he'll appreciate the lessons they taught him when he's older—and this lasts until he finds out he can get out of it by pyrokinetically setting the stage on fire.

🔺 She jokes ("jokes") that she didn't realize that when she was having a kid, she was firing herself from the pageant circuit so she could hire & train her own replacement. These jokes had no long-term impact on Bill at all!!!

(Compare/contrast: how we're told Stan's "You watch the movie, you scare the girl, the girl snuggles up next to you, next thing you know you gotta raise a kid, your life falls apart" is repeating something he heard his dad say.)

🔺 Did you know that squeaky baby shoes are sometimes medical devices? Squeakers help children with poor muscle tone and delayed motor skills learn how to walk correctly: it makes them want to walk on their heels instead of their toes so they can hear the squeak. Did you know sometimes oversized squeaky baby shoes are worn by young kids who need ankle braces? Did you know that kids with poor motor coordination can take a longer time to learn complicated motor skills like tying shoelaces rather than using shoes with velcro straps? It sure is interesting that baby Bill's most defining visual feature is oversized squeaky sneakers with velcro straps and that he kept wearing velcro shoes until he was 16!

🔺 As a baby, Bill's angles were technically supposed to be equilateral,* but thanks to his inherited condition, his angles were so loose his top corner practically formed a right angle. Not good: the closer a triangle creeps to being obtuse, the more likely he'll have muscle strain and medical issues from his organs being squished out of place by his own exoskeleton.

(*supposed to be equilateral: but after receiving treatment, they discovered his angles were still 60º, 60º, and 60.1º, which is mathematically impossible for a triangle... on a euclidean plane. But on a non-euclidean 3D plane, such as in spherical geometry, a triangle's angles can add up to more than 180º... and it's this slight 3D flex to Bill's body that lets him see up into the third dimension.)

🔺 For his first few years of life he actually had a hypotenuse, until physical therapy and side braces helped him improve his muscle tone. Sometimes he still reflexively refers to his base as his hypotenuse. It's fine, sweetie, it's nothing to be embarrassed about, mommy had a hypotenuse too. Don't tell anyone.

🔺 Scalene took baby Billy to a lot of doctors as a kid, just like how she was taken to a lot of doctors! Doctor for his side braces, doctor for his physical therapy, doctor for his shoes... doctor for his eye when he started talking about seeing white glitter at the edge of his vision. Scalene didn't have that symptom, but the eye doc said their condition does occasionally come with visual problems—blurred vision, lazy eye, visual field defects... It sounds like Bill's main field of vision is unobstructed, but if the visual snow he's getting in his peripheral vision is distracting him and confusing his little toddler mind into thinking it's something real, they can give him a medication that'll narrow his field of view. From the sound of it, he's not seeing anything important at the edge of his vision, anyway.

And she only wants what's best for her golden child.

🔺 Scalene's "bow" is actually a medical device: sort of like a medical corset, it helps tug and press her anatomy into place to reduce pain. Bill started wearing one preventatively—if he can keep everything in place when he's young, it'll take longer for his angles to skew when he's older. Like wearing a retainer when you get your braces out.

🔺 He has a cane for the same reason—he doesn't need it NOW when he's young, but he might as well keep it on hand, by age 35 he'll probably want to stand more often than float and when he's standing he'll probably want the extra support! Even if he doesn't need it by 35, he will eventually!!

🔺 Bill doesn't medically need a bow tie in the third dimension either; but he adapted it to help tie his 3D exoskeleton on.

🔺 A trillion years later, Bill suspects that his mutation to see the third dimension came, at least in part, from his mom's medical condition. Except, she didn't have that vision. Nobody else with the condition on her side of the family had that vision. It's not a known symptom of the condition. His dad had stuff going on with his eye too, did he get it from his dad's side? A mix of both? Just a standalone random mutation? He doesn't know; and with the rest of his species dead, there's no way for him to find out.

But back to Scalene!

🔺 She's not quite red, she's rose gold. However she doesn't like it. She thinks it's a sort of pinkish brown and very dull. She uses makeup to make herself look redder. Note how bright red her sides are: in a species where only your edges are visible, body paint is the most common form of makeup+fashion. She's pleased her baby came out gold-gold, it's much cuter. Bill knows she's rose gold, but he only saw her with her makeup off when she was tired or sick; he remembers her painted red.

🔺 She adores her Billy; but she somewhat sees him as an extension of her will. She thinks he's just perfect and will tell anyone who asks; but she also demands he be perfect and is furious when he isn't. She'll protect him from ANY perceived external threat; but she'll tough love him into being the kind of success she thinks he should be. He learns early that when he screws up, he can often redirect his mother's anger by pointing his finger and saying it's someone else's fault, and she'll bring the wrath of heaven down on them. Woe to the teacher who gives Bill an F on a test.

🔺 I'm on a quest to write Bill as a foil to the entire cast of Gravity Falls, and that extends to writing his family as a foil to the entire cast's families. Scalene's a blend of Pacifica's mom and Caryn: beautiful, proud of her beauty, afraid of losing her youth, self-aggrandizing, quick to lie about her & her family's (false/exaggerated) accomplishments—and very aware of the fact that you can say anything about woo-woo mystical matters and nobody can prove you wrong.

🔺 So she takes it great when they figure out Bill is, like, legit psychic. And by "takes it great" I mean "starts a cult."

There's what I've got on Scalene. Fortunately, I got to keep all my pre-TBOB headcanons about Bill's mom, I only had to change her shape & color. I already had medical trauma baked right into the family!

(Preemptive disclaimer before I get any "but she doesn't look 2D" comments: we all understand that the baby Bill picture we see in the book is a psychically-generated 3D approximation of Bill's 2D Euclidean form, right? And that drawing a 3D baby Bill design alongside rigidly 2D parent designs would make it look like even in the second dimension Bill already had a 3D body, right? So, if we're drawing a 3D baby Bill and want to convey that they looked similar to him, we have to draw his parents in a similar art style, right? Okay, great.)

[innerfare]

Mihawk Relationship Headcanons 

Summary: a random collection of Mihawk relationship headcanons

Genre: fluff

CW: None // SFW

———

He never imagined himself in a relationship. He’d had plenty of one night stands and situationships (he's notorious for allowing sexual tension to fester and never doing anything about it), but an actual relationship had always been off the cards. Until, that is, he met you. He didn’t really think too deeply about it, just started pursuing you. On some level, he knew he was putting you in danger, but he couldn’t stay away. 

Was definitely a victim of love at first sight. He fell first, and he fell harder. 

He is very secretive about his relationship with you, at first only visiting you in the dead of night and leaving before day break, appearing on your balcony like some sort of vampire or succubus. Shanks is the only person who knows about you, and he intends to keep it that way. 

Always brings you something- a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine, a piece of jewelry, a pastry he wants to share with you, a piece of lace, silk, or tulle he wants to see you in. Will also bring you books he thought you might like, souvenirs from far away lands, and even pieces of him to hold on to, such as his favorite dagger that now lives on your person (he spent an entire night teaching you how to use it and was ecstatic when you held it to his throat, definitely turned NSFW). Being in a relationship with him is basically like having tamed a wild animal that brings you dead mice he caught. TBH wouldn’t hesitate to bring you the severed head of an enemy if you so desired. 

Of course, he plays all of this off, either saying nothing or giving you a small lecture about how you needed that thing. “I happened to find a copy of that book you mentioned.” “I don’t suppose you have any use for this.” “I brought this vintage wine for myself but I suppose you can have some if you really want.” When he brings you flowers, he tells you it’s because your place is rather drab and if you won’t bother to liven it up, he’ll just have to do it for you (the man lives in a gloomy castle but shhh). When he brings you lingerie, he lays it on your bed without a word or says something along the lines of, “those panties you wore the last time were so cheap they chafed my skin. Wear these from now on.” Alludes to finding the jewelry he gives you in some sort of pirate horde he won’t go into detail on it since it’s in violation of his Warlord contract with the World Government, actually just purchases the pieces from various jewelers he meets on his travels; sometimes seeks out famous jewelers far off the beaten path if he thinks you’ll like that jeweler’s work.

Insists your relationship is not a relationship but is rather an affair. The sort of man to lie about cheating- not about not doing it, but about doing it so you don't get the impression he's committed to you. Won’t tell you he wants to be exclusive, but will yearn for it. Not good about communicating in general, very bad about just thinking things and hoping you’re thinking the same. 

For a long time, he didn’t even want you to come to the Muggy Kingdom for fear the Navy was watching him there and would find out about you. He also refused to speak to you over a transponder snail for fear they had tapped his. 

Never really warmed up to the idea of keeping you close but eventually grew so attached that he couldn’t stand to have you far away. Had no appetite if you weren’t at his table, couldn’t sleep if you weren’t in his bed, didn’t even want to take a shower if he couldn’t use your floral shampoo. Eventually, he convinced himself you were safer with him than without him, and that was that. 

Late nights cooking dinner (dinner is never before seven at Mihawk’s place). Afternoons gardening. Mornings spent discussing whatever’s in the newspaper. Evenings spent making out in the wine cellar because you went down to select a bottle for that night and got carried away. You sitting atop some ruins and watching him practice. Very domestic, but he hates that word. 

Won’t really tell you he loves you unless it’s a late night and he’s very drunk and you insist upon hearing it, certainly won’t admit to needing you, but will press a kiss into your hand and assure you he has deep affection for you. 

———

Hope you enjoyed it! If you want more, you can check out my masterlist here!

[bookscandlesnbts]

The Boyfriend Shot

Here is the Boyfriend Shot that is the subject of this post. I found this moment not only really cute but also really telling because Jimin could have elaborated on this “Boyfriend Shot” in 100 different directions if he wanted to, but he chose to leave it plain and simple. This is the Boyfriend Shot of Jungkook where the subject of “Who” (see what I did there 😉? I’m not clever okay, but I tried) is the photographer himself.

See, Jimin could have swooned that JK was Army’s boyfriend saying that he took it for Army and made it about the fandom. Or he could have implied it going in a hetero direction except he didn’t. He took the photo while sitting across from his boyfriend that he was on a trip with for himself because he definitely saved that photo on his phone. Jimin was boasting here. Peacocking. Saying this is my boyfriend I took the boyfriend shot. He’s with me and he’s my boyfriend so that’s what this photo is. And I love it. Jimin isn’t a big gesture guy as we usually know. One of the things I’ve loved about AYS is the moments where he is. Where he lets his guard down. Where he tells us things.

Similarly, reminds me of Jimin lying on the floor spread eagle saying that if you watch this show with Jungkook this is exactly how he is at home. That’s the key here folks. He deliberately says with Jungkook. He could have just played it off that he likes to lie around at home anywhere and everywhere but he needed to be clear and remind us that this is really how he acts at home because Jungkook is there too. And I’m not saying that they definitely live together but I am saying that he considers Jungkook part of his home.

Main takeaway is that I love seeing Jimin spill the tea. I love it when he tells us things and lets us in because he definitely is more guarded. I mean he wouldn’t even tell us his whiskey story on the show. 😅 but Jimin is a storyteller when he wants to be, and I loved seeing glimpses of those honest truths on the show. The last episode of Sapporo was my favorite episode of the Sapporo trip by far and I’ve already watched it three times.

Lastly, if anyone is curious, my controversial ranking of the episodes:

2>4>8>1>5>7>6>3

Can’t wait for the behinds!!! I was also thinking that remember when we kept seeing the behinds of each location decrease by a minute during their reviews? I don’t think they actually did! And maybe that’s why it went behind a paywall. I’m thrilled they are behind a paywall even if nothing too crazy happens. I wish more than anything we could gatekeep it from vile people. I really think JK knows about *them* ya’ll. I really do 🤫

[camilledlc]

I can't help but thinking about a X-Files AU for Poolverine, but instead of chasing aliens, they chase mutants.

I imagine Wade as Mulder, having the worst reputation because he's 'weird' and believes in stupid things like mutants. Logan is one of the best FBI agent, and he's very serious and a "no bullshit" kind of guy. Because of this, their superiors thought that pairing them together could be a great idea, and that Logan would bring Wade down back to Earth. But instead, the more cases they study, the more they both realize how real mutants are, and that they are already many among them.

Cool things to add would be that Wade still has his scars because of a case that went wrong, and it's another reason as to why people thinks he's crazy and are afraid of him. Could be a really great angst point with Logan being scared that Wade gets himself hurt again or something. Also, Logan could at some point be taken by secret government scientists that experiment on him to give him his claws, and they realize that he's actually a mutant himself. It would be really funny if Logan, the one guy who at first never thought he would believe in mutants, turned out to be one too.

And then we can have a whole discourse about how mutants are scary for humans and they hate them, and how the government is experiencing on them to turn them into weapons, etc.

[dark-frosted-heart]

Choose Your True Love - Keith Howell (part 1/4)

This is the from the 4th anniversary event

As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this. 

The twittering of birds stirred me from my slumber.

(Mmm…I ended up falling asleep)

(Huh, but I was waiting for Keith in his room, so how did I wind up in his secret room…)

When I sat up and rubbed my sleepy eyes, I felt something hit my hand.

It was Prince Keith’s diary, with its neat script unfinished.

(It’s an old diary. Was I reading this before I fell asleep…)

I stared up as I tried to remember—the sight that greeted me had me jump to my feet.

(No way…Half of Prince Keith’s diaries are missing…What in the…)

The shelves looked so empty, but I couldn’t find the missing diaries anywhere.

While I tried to wrap my head around what happened, I heard the door open.

Alter!Keith: …

Emma: Prince Keith! The diaries—

Alter!Keith: …

(Huh…?)

I suddenly felt a painful tug on my arm and found myself pinned against a bookshelf.

He held my wrists above my head and glared down at me with cold eyes. 

It’s the first time anyone's been this hostile toward me.

Alter!Keith: Who’re you? Why’re you here?

Emma: Huh, who…I’m Emma.

Alter!Keith: Emma? Sorry, but I don’t remember anyone with that name.

(It doesn’t sound like he’s joking. Does he really not know me…?)

(...Calm down. Panicking won’t change things)

I was trembling in confusion and fear, but I took some breaths to calm myself down.

~~ Flashback ~~

(It’s an old diary. Was I reading this before I fell asleep…)

(No way…Half of Prince Keith’s diaries are missing…What in the…)

~~ Flashback end ~~

(If the diaries never existed in the first place rather than just suddenly disappearing front he bookshelves…then Prince Keith’s reaction is “justifiable”)

(Am I…in the past?)

Emma: …

A large hand touched my neck and a chill went down my spine at the feeling of my life being in his hands.

Alter!Keith: You thinking about something? You’re underestimating me just ‘cause you’re dealing with a failure. Some damn noble told me I shouldn’t be nice to trespassers just ‘cause they’re female.

The grip around my neck tightened slightly.

(I don’t know if he’ll believe me. But at this rate, he won’t be just threatening me)

The wicked Prince Keith in front of me was way more like a beast than the one I knew.

Emma: …I have no idea why I’m here.

But one thing I know is that I’m not from this time, rather, I’m from the future.

Alter!Keith: Haha, your skills at deception suck so bad that it almost sounds true. You got proof?

Emma: …I know who “you” are. You’re a Prince Keith with an alternate personality…I know why you were born.

Alter!Keith: …

Emma: Please, believe me.

His golden eyes wavered, as if doubting reality.

As he opened his mouth to speak, a knock sounded on the door in the other room.

Liam: ……Excuse me?

It was Liam, Prince Keith’s butler.

He stared at me in surprise and raised a brow.

Liam: Prince Keith…What is the meaning of this?

This pressure he’s exuding…He must think that wicked Prince Keith snuck a woman in.

Prince Keith gave an irritatingly wicked smile.

Alter!Keith: Found her in the study. Our guest says she’s from the future.

Liam: ……Huh?

(He furrowed his brows…That’s a valid reaction)

(But even I’m surprised)

Emma: You believe me, Prince Keith?

Alter!Keith: It’s not that. But “my” existence is also improbable. So someone coming from the future isn’t impossible either. You said your name’s Emma? Tell me the reason why I was born.

Emma: Well…

(Though it’s something that happened to the nice Prince Keith, it’s still a painful past for the wicked Prince Keith)

I stuttered as I recalled the pained look on Prince Keith’s face when he told me.

Alter!Keith: …You actually know. Liam, you believe it a little more now, don’t you?

Emma: Did you just ask him to verify?

Alter!Keith: I said I didn’t believe you. 

Liam: The reason is as absurd as ever. …However, I don’t believe you’re lying. Besides, you’re the first to not freak out about Prince Keith acting differently from usual. But even I…didn’t believe you in the beginning.

(Liam and Prince Keith have known each other since they were children)

(Maybe it took him a moment to come to terms with reality because he was too confused)

Those furrowed brows and look of regret broke my heart.

Alter!Keith: We can throw her into a cell and torture her if she acts suspicious. You don’t look like you’re good at running away.

Emma: I won’t. Rather, I won’t leave your side no matter what. Because I personally don’t want to.

Alter!Keith: Oh? You care a lot about this failure. A guy without any merit.

Emma: What, yes he does. He has a lot.

Alter!Keith: Fine, he has a lot. Pardon me.

(...He just brushed me off)

(At least I can stick around as long as I don’t act suspicious…That’s a relief)

Suddenly, what happened in the study came to mind.

(Now that I think about it, I wonder what Prince Keith was going to say)

Alter!Keith: …So, did you bring it Liam?

Liam: Yes. Please be careful with it.

Alter!Keith: It’d be better to spread them out. That way, they can wreck each other and resolve this immediately.

He snickered, took the documents, and looked over them.

He was smiling, but his eyes were surprisingly cold.

Alter!Keith: Reliable as ever. Good boy. For now, I’ll go pay the guys here a visit. Prepare a carriage.

Liam: On it.

After bowing, Liam left the room.

My eyes drifted to the documents and some of the names on it caught my attention.

(If I recall correctly, they’re all nobles that support the king’s brother)

I remember coming across them while I was reading books to prepare myself for my official duties.

Emma: Um, what exactly are these documents?

Alter!Keith: …Wanna come along?

[ceasarslegion]

I am aware of the irony of soap boxing about this but it's entirely possible to soap box too much, and lean into buzzkill territory where it becomes very hard to talk to you and therefore very hard to want to talk to you at all. I saw this happen a few times when I went to a con recently, which turned me off of wanting to go up and ask for the exhibitors tumblr URLs to see if they wanted to hang out more.

Specifically, I went to an anime trivia panel that included a bunch of classics like Cardcaptor Sakura, Ouran High School, Berserk, etc. Whenever one of these shows were mentioned the exhibitors went off on weird tangents to make absolutely sure everybody in the room knew how problematic they thought they were and how they don't support anything that the shows obviously (/s) did, in case you were wondering. They also made weird comments about a lovely artist who had a sign saying she had an nsfw flipbook and had no real limits for commission orders because "what if the kids here saw that??" I was thinking of going to anime karaoke until they said they were hosting that one, and I decided not to because I was put off by the possibility that they would take some kind of moral issue with whatever anime op I tried to sing.

Another one I went to, someone shared that the nanowrimo website had tons of worldbuilding and character resources and one of them INTERRUPTED HER to lean into the mic and make sure everyone in the room knew they didn't support nanowrimo and thought they were really bad and awful and that no one should use them, and the whole room felt really awkward because we were like dude??

And recently I stopped talking to one of my coworkers because he takes some kind of moral issue in every little thing I show him. I told him to watch Madoka Magica and he made it all the way to the op before slamming me about how he thought it was pedophilic and a slippery slope and "how could you watch something like that???" and refused to hear anything about how not all nudity is sexual and human bodies are just human bodies sometimes.

This makes you so freaking hard to talk to man, sometimes I think people should stop being so obsessed with if other people will think they support the worst possible interpretation of something and just chill the fuck out. It's not that deep if someone has fond memories of Ouran High School, it's just an anime. It's not that deep if someone remembers a place to get resources, it's just a website. It's not that deep if a show shows actual human bodies in non-sexual settings. Calm the fuck down.

[annoyinglandmagazine]

You know that whole scene with Klaus reuniting with Punch and Judy/ Adam and Lilith? That already gives me so many emotions but I ended up accidentally making it worse with headcanons about their previous relationship that I hope at some point will make it into a fic:

Bill and Barry never really grasped the way constructs were treated outside of Mechanicsburg. They don’t really get the concept that something like that could matter so much to people, that they would actively view people as less than human for a few stitches or an extra limb. That the insanity of Mechanicsburg could actually be an improvement on the rest of the world that supposedly cared about morals in this one thing that they’d never even questioned before.

They try, they really do, they get righteously furious about it every other week, but they never really get it. They’re more confused than anything when Klaus and Judy tell them they should be the ones to ask for boarding while travelling anonymously because they’re less likely to be turned away.

They don’t notice that Punch and Judy take certain adventures more personally than the rest of them do, the way they went all still when hearing a monologue about constructs taken as ‘spare parts’ by Sparks that insist it doesn’t count because they’re not people anyway. Even worse the supposed ‘heroes’ they work with to take down rogue Sparks and then turn around and insist that the job isn’t finished until they purge the area of the Spark’s creations as well.

They’re complaining about their professors and Klaus explains why he dislikes one of them by casually bringing up that he had a pet theory of a ‘sliding scale of humanity’ and he once derailed a lecture by trying to place Klaus on it. They are horrified and murderous and Klaus becomes the first person to marvel at how sheltered someone was growing up in Mechanicsburg.

So there is always a certain connection between Punch, Judy and Klaus over this in particular because they know that Bill and Barry can’t possibly understand. Not like they do. And it’s important, to Punch and Judy entering an outside world for the first time and having it reject them even as it grows used to and even welcomes the Heterodynes but not them, never fully. Heterodynes can redeem themselves with enough determination but how can you redeem yourself when your only crime to begin with was existing?

It’s important to Klaus who knew relatives and friends who looked like they had to force themselves to say his name without flinching because they didn’t really believe it was him they were talking to. University was a fresh start but it took years for him to break the nervous habit of adjusting his cuffs and collar to cover his skin because it was just exhausting to watch the way people changed once they noticed.

Sometimes they talked about it but most of the time they’re just there for each other and that’s enough. Also they’re all way more willing to get into a fight on someone else’s behalf than their own so it gives them a nice opening to beat the shit out of bigots.

On an unrelated and slightly less angsty note I also think that Punch and Judy were sort of the mom friends of the Heterodyne adventures. They got into the habit of spending a considerable amount of their lives trying to make these insane twenty somethings get some rest every now again and the rest of it complaining (Punch naturally had a sign language that the Boys may have invented specifically for him but communicated perfectly adequately through Looks as well) the constant, stupid risks they took to their own lives.

When it became clear that they couldn’t have children Bill and Barry couldn’t feel more terrible about it, they spent ages trying to come up with a solution but couldn’t imagine one where there was an ironclad guarantee of no amnesia. Klaus suggested adoption since they were so good with the orphans they came across but, though it wasn’t ruled out, Judy half jokingly made comments about how she was busy enough with ‘her boys’ anyway so she didn’t need children for now.

Klaus finds it easiest to talk to Punch sometimes because he really listens and waits until he’s finished speaking to offer input when it’s wanted (it usually isn’t). He’s also exceptionally good at reading non verbal cues which is helpful because Klaus always had some kind of allergy to talking about anything personal.

Judy knows about Lucrezia and Klaus. She’s fairly certain Bill is the only one of them who doesn’t. She personally thinks both of them would be a lot better off with someone else, anyone else really. She distrusts something in Lucrezia’s eyes when she’s around them, calculating and almost predatory, but then both of them had unusual ideas of what constituted romance. She doesn’t like it but she doesn’t say anything. Years later she’ll wish she had.

When Punch and Judy hear that Klaus is back from the dead and annihilating all the warring nobility’s armies that cross his path they think ‘Well something else is clearly going on there but that does sound a little like what Klaus would do if he went off the deep end to be perfectly honest.’

They find out he’s conquering an empire and that sounds a lot less like Klaus. Then Barry returns in a complete panic, holding his niece like a lifeline and talking about how Klaus is working for the Other.

It’s a struggle to even contemplate it, the same Other that killed Bill’s infant son and most likely Bill as well, the Other that destroyed the Wulfenbach barony and massacred its people, including Klaus’ own parents, the Other that ravaged Europa sending it into a state of utter chaos. They know Klaus. They’ve known him since he was reckless eighteen year old who just wanted to make the world a better place. They know him.

But…… A few months ago they would have said the thought of subjugating the continent would never cross Klaus’ mind, that he’d never do something like that. He wasn’t that kind of Spark. On their bad days the boys used to talk about what would happen if either of them ever crossed ‘the line’ and though they’d all reassured them that they never would Klaus had promised in complete sincerity that he wouldn’t let them.

No one had ever thought that Klaus might need to have a line. He never even properly lost control of a fugue, he didn’t forget morals in the heat of the moment, every decision he made he’d stand by years later as the right one. He took things further than the boys sometimes but that was because he’d concluded it was for the best and he didn’t need a strict code the way they, still wrestling and redirecting those Heterodyne urges inside them, did.

They also knew Barry and he wouldn’t ever be able to believe something like that if there’d been any other explanation. Barry had known Klaus too.

Basically I’m never going to get over the tragedy that is this group of people because they were friends! They were probably the first real friends any of them had had! They were so young and optimistic and they decided they were going to start fixing things because no one else would. They thought the world could get better and people deserved second chances and for a while it actually worked and it meant something and then it blew up in their faces.

Everything falls apart worse than it was when they started, they lose everyone close to them and they wonder if the world was ever really going to change at all. When the era of the Heterodyne Boys comes to an end they don’t face it together the way they always thought they would if they failed. It ends with all of them are separated and so disillusioned that they’ll believe that even their closest friends would betray them and humanity in the worst way possible.

[sparklingcid3r]

canon in the book, pony gets grounded by darry for drinking with twobit? how do u think that went down? like the actual drinking, and then darry finding out?

I was actually curious about this so I went and found the passage in the book, I’m guessing this is what you’re referring to?

And I kind of interpreted it as Pony just taking a beer from the fridge when no one was home, but it’s definitely possible that Two-Bit got him some to try. But anyway that’s not even important lol

Pony’s DEF a lightweight because wdym it tasted awful but also you had enough to get drunk? He had one bottle and was conked out fr (so actually it would make sense for Two-Bit to be with him, he probably drank the whole thing to not seem like a pussy or smth smh 🤦‍♀️)

That said, I imagine Pony’s either a happy or sleepy drunk, like he’s telling everyone everything that he appreciates about them, and since only Two-Bit was around he got to hear Pony sing his praises and also everyone else’s, it was absolutely an ego-boost. So either that or Pony’s falling asleep on any surface available in any position his drunk ass finds comfortable.

Darry found out when he got home to both Two-Bit and Pony in the living room acting like fools with each other, and he couldn’t even raise the hell he wanted to because Pony’s drunk and won’t remember what he’s said in the morning and also the kid is currently half-asleep and flopping against Darry when he tries to maneuver him to the bedroom.

The next morning is ROUGH for Pony lmfao🙏 brother just finished throwing up and Darry’s ducking his head into the bathroom to tell him he’s grounded😭

[raayllum]

Callum is so right about Rayla never doing anything for herself. You could say freeing Runaan was for herself but she also treats it as her "sacred promise" and chose him for Ethari too (shows how great her heart is). You think sparing Callum will finally count as her doing something for herself? Choosing her future and her love for him over the "greater good". She couldn't get her og parents back‚ this girl keeps losing and suffering she seriously deserves more wins

God, I could write an entire meta about that line - maybe one day when I'm feeling self indulgent. In regards to your actual prompt, re: saving Callum will count as something for herself -- a big yes, absolutely, I think! Though I think freeing her parents is something she deeply wanted for herself, too ("I miss you so much" / "so I wanted to do something for yourself for you") even if it was something she was continually putting off till the Aaravos situation, as far as she knew, was resolved

Prior to S6 I went back and forth on whether the show would frame Rayla's end of the possession plot line / trying to get Callum back as either "It doesn't matter what happens to me (again) I just want to save him" (which is what leaving in TTM and other moments was about) OR whether it'd be framed as "I refuse to sacrifice him / something I want (again)" and therefore be character development. I leaned towards the latter for reasons outlined here since the two have the chance to be even more thematically codependent than they already are in terms of their senses of identity:

As long as Callum is Callum (not possessed, or she has reason to believe he’s still in there), Rayla likely won’t be able to bring herself to kill him. This is from an emotional / characterization standpoint, of course, but from a thematic standpoint, we can see where it stems from Callum and Rayla continually being each other’s main connection to their sense of identity. As long as Callum is Callum (“you’re the destiny is a book you write yourself guy”), he’s worth saving. As long as Callum is Callum, she can be Rayla (“Rayla’s brave. She saves people” / “Rayla. My name is Rayla, and I’m going home”). As long as she’s Rayla, he can be Callum. Because if Callum isn’t Callum, then he’s dead, and if he’s dead, she can kill him. And if Rayla kills him, if Callum is dead, then she won’t be Rayla anymore. Because to literally kill Callum would be to simultaneously symbolically/emotionally kill herself.

This goes both ways of course - Callum can't/won't sacrifice Rayla because to do so would be to sacrifice a fundamental part of himself (namely his deep and Pure devotion to others which means he'll never go entirely down the negative side of Viren's path, and keep to the positive - leaving Aaravos, breaking free, etc). This was subtext prior to S6, but now it's actual text (she's his light/truth/hope of salvation, etc) so it goes double going forward. This is true for Rayla too — Callum is her guiding light and her star, he's one of the people who's taught her the most about how to love and the person she wants to be.

With all that in mind, yeah, I do think that Rayla will choose to not sacrifice Callum for the right reasons. Part of this is scaffolded under witnessing Callum not sacrificing her No Matter What prior to her won choice, and realizing "what [she] most deeply desires" isn't just Callum's survival even, but specifically the life they can have together, which she needs to stick around for and thereby not sacrifice herself. Runaan is also explicitly remorseful over the actions he took towards her where he choose duty over love, so Rayla realizing she should choose love over duty ties into them growing together as well in a positive way. We also see her realize some of this I think in choosing to let Lain and Tiadrin stay together rather than separate them specifically because of the Moonphoenix bracelet Callum gave her as well.

"I risked losing the best thing I ever had" because of her own duty turned revenge vs "I refuse to lose either of us like this" and finally fully accepting an assassin was never who she was and never who she Should be, in sacrificing others' lives or her own included. Them both Choosing each other above everything else was exactly what I was hoping for as soon as the "I need you to kill me" plot line started / wrote in my first CHET fic pre-S4 years ago:

She has two options as she pulls away. She can make a grab for her swords and go out, swords blazing. Kill Viren or Aaravos if she can as the sky splits open, purple and thrumming with magic; die with a sword in her hand in all likelihood. The release spell has already started. Or she can help Callum up, and they can live to fight another day—together. Rayla grips the back of his jacket. Presses her forehead to his neck for a second, tears building her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she says. His arm tightens around her, like he’s braced for her to go. “Rayla—” “I’m so sorry,” she repeats, sobbing. This is all her fault, but she can’t do that to him. “We have to get out of here.” [...]

Callum is staring at her when she pulls back and she swallows hard. She doesn’t know what to say. It’s both a blessing and a curse when he speaks first. “You chose me,” he says, not quite softly; she can tell there’s a lump in his throat. An edge of anger that not doing so was even an option. “Yeah, well. It was about time,” she says quietly. “I—”

So uh, here's hoping!

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

Fun Carmy

Fun Carmy is relaxed Carmy, the other one is Logan, his social alter ego.

I was wondering if Carmy ever had a day of fun in whole life because IMO he has always been that anxious lil kid around others, that we saw in Fishes (02X06), I’m sure. He’s better at the tête-à-tête like the one he briefly had with Michelle that evening

OR as part of small close-knit groups, like that scene in the kitchen (Ceres 01x06).

These assumptions, I think, are also completely backed up by his S1 -Emmy Winning- monologue (Braciole 01x08).

And what I ended up realizing is that FUN CARMEN is not the one we might think we haven’t really seen yet, and that fun for him does NOT look like it may look for us or for a more extrovert type of person.

I happen to be listening to Nina as I type this, and she once said:

I think that quote fits Carmy and his "sense of fun" perfectly.

Fun Carmy is relaxed Carmy, and at peace Carmy.

This is fun Carmy

Fun for Carmy doesn't look like this

Fun Carmy is relaxed Carmy

Logan is not "fun", he is actually a source of anxiety for Carmy, and that's why he can't keep him "on" for long. He wasn't lying when he said he wasn't remotely OK at the party (Pop 02x05) because at that point he hadn't turned Logan on yet.

Logan is "The other one", the one most people would label as "fun", because it better fits the social CONSTRUCT of what fun looks like, but Logan Fernello Berzatto is actually his functional alter-ego.

His functional or social alter - ego explained from a behaviorist perspective

We all have functional alter egos, this is related to the PERSONAL constructs concept developed by Psychologist George Kelly. These are formed at a fairly early age, even well within our 20s we are still forming our personalities and constructs or ideas of how the world works and what everything means, and thus how we should interact with and/or react to this world we live in, in other words, how to adapt or not to our environment. Then comes our career that can prolong this formative period even more, for instance, celebs of any age are required to have an alter ego for those occasions on which they have to "turn it on" for the camera or the stage → "the stage persona" that is NEVER the same person as the real one behind the wheel of the "functional alter-ego" and this persona has been formed based on their ideal of what has worked best for them in the past, what their PR team or Managers require of them to get them jobs, etc. They may come across as genuine and relatable but celebs are usually always "on" when we see them even off camera, so they are not, not completely. We all have the "office construct", the "school construct", the "mom chat group construct", etc. That is actually a sign of being well-adjusted to fit in society, and that is why we do not act the exact same way in all those different situations even though we are the same person, because we are not the same "persona" and that's OK. It's not a sign of phoniness, or lack of honesty, although it can definitely turn into that and become dysfunctional when there's an underlying mental health disorder, although it doesn't always turn out like that, thank dog!

In Carmy's case in particular, he can handle Logan and turn him on / off at will, which means he's in that aspect still well-adjusted despite his multiple mental health conditions, probably because none of them is a personality disorder, so it's safe to assume that he somewhat knows what's he's doing, he's choosing it to a certain extent and it's not 100% unconscious, only partially.

His lines are becoming blurry because he let Syd in, whether he admits it or not. And deep down, he knows this but he's not fully willing to go there (yet). That's what S4 is for.

This aligns with the rest of his behavior I already went over in previous posts:

Fun Carmy is the one that California, Copenhagen, and Chicago post-Sydney Adamu brought out in him. He's what most people, not me, would call relaxed, chilled, etc.

Relaxed Carmy, at peace Carmy, coloring Carmy, talking about food and cracking lil jokes under a table Carmy, is FUN CARMY.

We know him already. We've seen him. He just turns him off when he's The Bear or Logan.

Remember to follow my tag #Gingerpovs 💋

[stardustbuck]

glad to see other people having the same issue i do with the dadt hc. i don't want to make people feel bad for having it but also it does not sit well with me especially when we already know how much tommy struggled with his sexuality.

I'm going to assume ppl who have this HC don't know and haven't dived into the specifics of what getting a discharge via dadt implies especially at the time Tommy was in the army. it's not a slap on the wrist discharge, you got essentially kicked out with all your benefits stripped from you just like every other dishonorable discharge (minus jail time for ppl who committed actual crimes). I especially don't think Tommy would have done something smth reckless enough to get caught, being lgbt during this time, especially in the military was dangerous. it wasn't unheard of to be beaten or even killed/attempted murder by other service members. hate crimes in the military were just as common outside of the service. I do think Tommy was definitely down low during his time from the military up until he left the 118, but he was very careful.

dadt went on your record and a job like LAFD would definitely be looking at Tommy's military records and seeing he was dadt in 2004/2005 would have had his application thrown in the trash tbh. I know this is the suspend your disbelief show, but I seriously would be upset if this was overlooked because it destroyed a lot of queer service members lives and continues to cause issues for many queer veterans who are still fighting to get their benefits since dadt was repealed.

IMO there's a reason Tommy was closeted for so long, it was instilled in him throughout his childhood, his military service and captain gerrard. he probably felt ashamed of it for so long, which is why is took him until his 30s to come to terms with the fact that he is gay and he did a lot of work to be where he is currently with Buck.

I get that dadt adds angst and drama to potential Tommy lore but I simply do not see how it makes any sense for Tommy to be dadt'd nor do i need or want more queer trauma porn in this show.

but yk, everyone is entitled to their own opinions. I'm simply trying to spread the word on why I find this hc ... not the best.

[mynameisjag]

From a fic I never finished, Bruce and Damian enjoy a day out. That's it, just them having a good day.

It wasn’t often that Bruce went out into Gotham as well, just Bruce…not Batman or Brucie Wayne.

Just Bruce.

Changing into simple clothing, letting his hair air dry and just heading out like that and the public didn’t recognize him.

No slicked back hair or suits of any kind.

Just a t-shirt, his favorite throw over cardigan and what Dick insisted was mom jeans, a five o’clock shadow, and he was ready to go.

Just a quick trip to the shopping center to pick up some office supplies for his home office, a few groceries for Alfred, some snacks for the Batcave, and he probably needed to check the family chat to see if anyone needed anything while he was out.

A quick glance at his messages as he began to head out, already on his way to the garage, Dick was trying his best to convince him to get…strawberry flavored Batty-O’s with crackling and popping sprinkles…sounds horrible and right up his eldest alley…also full of terrible sugars…

Alfred would hunt both of them down if he brought this home.

He’ll just order it and have it shipped to Dick’s apartment…

Jason wanted him to fuck off…Bruce sent off a xoxo and a request to come over for tea in response to that. He got a thumbs up and a middle finger.

Tim…is either half asleep and texting or is trying to send out a code for everyone to decipher…both was possible…adding melatonin to the list…

Cass was sending happy faces, so it’s seems she’s good at the moment, sending her a heart, ballet shoes and a crown. His dancing princess.

Duke sent a thumbs up and got one back in return.

Steph was just saying she’ll just take what she needs from his place whenever…time to restock the “hidden” care packages then.

And Damian…Damian was staring him down from the passenger seat of the car…

“Damian…is there something you need that you couldn’t put in chat?”

“I am coming with you.”

“…you hate the public…”

“I will overcome my distaste of others and escort you, Father, you shall not face the scrutiny of the common by yourself.”

Aww, he just wanted to spend time together and Bruce could never refuse the baby of the family, “Of course, I appreciate your concern.”

His darling just puffed up with a smug smile, proud that he managed to get his way without any argument, “I’m glad you are agreeable.”

Look, they are communicating!

Not well, but it was a step forward!

Besides Damian even took the effort to dress more ‘civilian’, the green sweater with a little tiny bird stitched in with the words ‘just a bobbin like a robin’ was definitely a gift from Dick.

Adjusting the seat belt and getting the car out of the garage, Bruce just hummed happily, letting the silence settle between them comfortably. Mentally going back over his list, glancing over to see his son playing on an old handheld game. Something that was more then likely stolen out of Tim’s room, but with the older boy making his own place in the city, it would be awhile before it would be noticed it was gone.

Almost all his children had moved out…he was happy they were moving on in their lives, looking more into their futures but his heart hurt because his babies weren’t actually babies any more. They would have argued that none of them were ever babies with him but he would just ignore that.

He hoped this doesn’t result in empty nest syndrome…

“Baba, can we stop by the game store, I want to see if I can find more interesting games.”

“We can, after we get everything on the list, can you check my phone and see if anyone has sent in anything they want to be picked up-what in Lady Gotham is this?”

Bruce blinked as traffic was stopped to let a…small parade of Batman floats pass by…

“There are copycats out on the street, how dare they parade around as us!”

“…I think parade is the word, look at the banners…”

Batman Day!

“So they are not copycats…but worshippers…”

Bruce tried not to laugh at the thought, "I think the word is…enthusiastics…”

They both watched as a man walked past wearing a banner that said, “Priest of The Bat”.

“…and we will be investigating that later, let’s see if we can park and look around.”

“Time for some detective work, Father?”

“Undercover detective work.”

Damian was eagerly typing away on the phone, “I shall keep the others off our trail so they won’t interrupt our investigation, also according to the online advertisement, the parade will end in the park where the “Batman Day festival” will begin. They will have bat themed mooncakes at certain booths.”

“Are the mooncakes important to the investigation?”

“One must keep all possibilities open, we must check each booth for clues.”

Bruce kept the smile that was threatening to grow held down, he was sure the boy wouldn’t appreciate being cooed over his want of treats being disguised as being extra thorough, more so that he didn’t want his siblings interrupting their day. He was going to have to order everything online and have it shipped to the manor then, mundane chores could wait.

His baby wanted mooncakes.

He will get mooncakes.

It didn’t take too long to park and follow the short parade to the fairgrounds, even with them stopping and staring at the lookalikes, a man giving them a balloon with the bat symbol and the words ‘I believe in Gotham’s local cryptids’, and someone clipping tiny bat wings to the back of their shirts at some point.

Soon the entrance was in view and by that time, Damian was now on Bruce’s shoulders, taking in the crowd, head turning back and forth at the bright lights, the performers in bat themed outfits, wide eyed as a child runs in front of then in a Robin costumes.

Bruce is humming thoughtfully to himself as he eyes a group in clown makeup done up in a Gothic theme, so far all they seem to be doing is some parlor tricks for the crowd around them. Some people even taking selfies, it was a rare sight for a Gothamite to get close to a clown without violence.

He was wondering if he should text the others, surely by now they would be aware of this festival happening, Barbara had to have known…

“Darling, do you want to text your siblings?”

“I can tell them to be on alert for any suspicious behaviors while we blend into the crowd…like the one over by the dart game.”

Bruce could only blink as his head was forcefully turned toward a booth with a bunch of balloons tied to a backboard, “Dart game?”

“Yes, obviously it’s a skill test but what kind? We must investigate.”

Hmm, a skill test that totally didn’t have to do with the giant plush animals as prizes.

“I think I remember Dick saying how these games were rigged,” he watches as a parent carries off their crying kid, wincing in sympathy as the cries get louder.

“No amount of trickery could possibly stop us!”

[londondungeon2]

concept with jade leech

there is no dire-beast inside the mirror chamber, and there are no ghosts inhabiting ramshackle. it is simply: you, alone in a rundown building, after the headmaster leaves.

you have been pinching yourself through the day. little crescent marks litter your wrist.

for the past six or so hours, you have been trying really hard to wake up from this dream. nothing is working. desolate, you take to wandering the house.

you know your imagination is strong but an entire college, idiosyncratic characters, and an entire furnished building is a bit complex. still, you card through the squabble, hoping to unearth some mistake in physics that will tell you that this is a dream. that search ends abruptly when you find a loose floorboard and the fragile wood underneath you gives out like a snapped cracker.

you land hard.

ten feet down in the basement, lying on your back.

blinking away dust, your eyes land upon the piece of wood speared cleanly through your abdomen.

the pain tells you this is too much to be a dream.

it is a full two hours you lie there immobile. you try rolling on your side, hoping to at least stand up, but each motion is anguish in an ineffable amount. you wrap your hands around the red wood and try to pull; it leads to your eyeballs rolling so far back you see new colors. skin shining with generous sweat and dipping in and out of consciousness, you lie there and bid limited time until someone from this new world comes to find you. the headmaster will eventually come back, right?

you think about a multitude of things.

you think about how if your corpse withers here, the puss running out your orifices will look like cream cheese.

you think about how the glittering wands those students held might work, is it like harry potter or a unique universe.

you think about how you still had to go to work tomorrow in your own original universe, attend classes, hope plans with friends don’t fall through so you laugh carefree without lungfuls of blood.

your last slip from consciousness to eternal unconsciousness, you think about home. the bed you slept in, the books read and films watched, the snack wrappers on the sheets, what a comforting waste.

you drift off, expecting to be jolted awake again by your own feverish mind, and die, bleeding out on ramshackle’s basement floor.

it takes azul awhile to gain ramshackle’s dorm.

the one new student he saw during the opening ceremony apparently stayed there one night and fled the next morning. as the headmaster’s report goes, crowley found no one living there when he went to check the following day. however, the usage of ramshackle by that magicless student opened up a gate of opportunity and azul did not let it go to waste.

the negotiations took awhile and the proper refurbishment will have to be done. but just before winter exams, azul has managed to secure himself a second location for mostro lounge.

first, damages have to be assessed.

the building is disgusting, rundown, and simply inhabitable. busy with the 250 students he has under contract, azul assigns jade to spend a november afternoon there and make note of what they need to start repairing first.

azul really hopes the plumbing is salvageable. the cost would be through the roof if otherwise.

so jade, hand over his heart, promises to survey ramshackle the next day and outline a list of high priority repairs to stuff they can skimp upon in the budget.

jade’s excited. the mountains he treks are northwest and ramshackle is northeast; this will provide him a new opportunity to see what kind of mushroom may lie on that side of the island. …oh, and he supposes he will also assist azul in his endeavor as well.

the next day, he spends half of the allotted time foraging outside of ramshackle before he actually walks into the building. i should make this quick and efficient. i only have thirty minutes left. notepad in hand, he starts to investigate the wreckage.

uninhabited and ugly. those are the two words that rise to jade’s mind first. truly, it is a lovely space and it would be a disgrace to see it painted in shades of lilac and oceanic decor. but, it will be entertaining nonetheless to see azul’s business expand.

yet, as he’s walking down the halls, jade cannot help but think he is hearing a second pair of footsteps just behind him.

yes, ramshackle is ugly but it does not seem to be as uninhabited as he thought. how intriguing.

so, sadistic grin blooming, jade decides to play a game. he will ignore this secondary person and continue on, waiting anxiously to see what will happen. he marks down his observations, all while feeling a pair of eyes upon his neck. lighting on the first floor needs fixing. the water runs orange in the upstairs sink. nothing entirely formidable has happen yet, but he hopes it will.

jade cannot wait to see if this ghost can turn his skin inside out, or perhaps drop a floorboard on top of his head, the possibilities are endless. it all has jade’s toes squirming in his dress shoes in anticipation.

however, his thirty minutes are up before he can descend the basement stairs and nothing has happened yet.

which is disappointing.

he’ll be back again tomorrow so there is always a chance for something then.

however, he had hoped for something to happen now.

just as jade is walking out the door, list and bag of mushrooms in hand, something ice cold tickles the hairs on his neck. frigid like home. he barely gets a chance to dwell on it before five frozen fingers wrap themselves around his throat and shove him down the porch steps.

the door to ramshackle slams shut.

sprawled on the ground, jade reaches his hand up to the idents on the column of skin, the previous touch thawing out.

he cannot help the deep blush that comes up to his face.

with a deep breath, his own gloves fingers still hovering over the lost embrace, jade stands up and pats himself down. he looks upon the closed door with a hunger in his eyes.

yes, tomorrow he will be back.

and he hopes this ghost will act up again because they have so much more allure to jade than a second mostro lounge.

[creatingblackcharacters]

here's a threefer if that's okay, all from Codename: Kids Next Door (early 2000s cartoon network show about kids with wacky technology who fight against adult tyranny)—since their stories are pretty well intertwined, and i can't really talk about just one without including the others here's Numbuh 5/Abigail Lincoln, one of the 5 main characters (Sector V of the titular Kids Next Door organization). she's the voice of reason and the "cool" one of the group.

she's the one who holds the group together most of the time, and has great leadership skills—though she refused to be the official leader of Sector V due to an Incident when she was younger. at the end of the show, though, when the actual leader Numbuh 1 leaves for space, he requests that she become the leader of the sector again. she accepts, and eventually then goes on to become the Supreme Leader of the entire KND. love to see a girlboss winning!!

she also has an adventurous side—there's an arc where she goes on various treasure hunts for rare, mystical candies, and i think that's hella cool.

then there's her older sister, Cree. (yes, named after Cree Summer! she voices both her and Abigail.)

cree is a recurring villain—a teenager, one of the natural enemies of the KND. what's unique about her compared to the other villains is that she used to be a member of the KND herself, before betraying the organization on her 13th birthday and escaping "decommissioning" (the process through which all KND operatives have their memories of the organization removed when they turn 13, i.e. are no longer kids).

aside from being just as cool and skilled in combat as her sister, she and her sister have an incredibly compelling dynamic. back when she was a kid, she and numbuh 5 used to be good friends and partners in adult-tyranny-fighting. in fact, 5's signature hat used to be cree's, which she gave to her out of pride for 5 having completed her second mission. in the present, though, their relationship has done a complete 180˚. they're at each other's throats constantly, now that cree had grown into the very type of person she used to be fighting against, WITHOUT memory alteration to boot.

...or so it seemed. in the episode OPERATION: VIRUS when cree was infected with the KND's "unpoppable zit" virus on the night of her prom, 5 actually went to lengths to get the antidote for her because even she thought it was "too far". in 5's words, "you may be my archenemy, but you're still my sister."

so yeah! they actually still care about each other deep down. aughhhhhh. this is just a headcanon but i imagine that to numbuh 5, her hat is a reminder of the good days when she worked together with cree. perhaps she holds on to it as hope that they can reconcile someday? idk

and finally, here's numbuh 9/Maurice. he was also on abby and cree's team back in the days.

his episode literally made me cry, man. it's focused around his 13th birthday and his decommissioning, which everyone in the KND is tearful about since he was one of the greatest and most beloved operatives in the organization's history. seeing him going from a cool kid operative, dedicated to his organization's mission, to an average, kinda dickish teenager was a bit heartbreaking when i watched it at first

one thing i love about this show is how it's a satire of the childhood experience and the pains of growing up that imo is best understood by ppl who've actually gone through it. the trope of decommissioning, as well as the whole conflict between teens and kids, really hammers in the pain of the end of childhood and how fast things change for you as you grow up. how so many decomm'd operatives had unfinished business that they never get to finish. in real life it's like, there was a moment when you put down your favorite toys or hung out with that one childhood friend for the last time, but never knew it was the last at the time. it's so tragic and juicy aughhhh. a line numbuh 5 says to cree during this episode illustrates it best: "you're a teen...maurice's a teen...soon i'm gonna be a teen...why keep fighting it"

however, it turns out he wasn't actually decommissioned! but rather he kept all his memories and was brought on as a secret undercover teen operative, thanks to all he accomplished while he was in the KND. no one is supposed to know about this except the highest of the higher-ups in the KND, but he trusts numbuh 5 with this info thanks to the bond they had. so he continues his legacy as a heroic figure. i really, really love his character, his dynamics with both numbuh 5 and cree (the latter of whom he pretends to ally with and date), and all the show's themes he represents.

also fun fact he's voiced by Khary Payton, who also did Cyborg from Teen Titans!

Hot Chocolate loves this show, so imma pass it off to him. Though first imma say that I do remember how as a kid I was shocked that it was allowed for your character to have your real name lol, I always thought that was so groundbreaking and taboo. Like aww! Her name is Cree, and so is her character! Now to him:

Hot Chocolate: SOMEONE GETS IT. These three black kids had me ready to join KND, kick butt, and steal ice cream. Numbuh 5 was my favorite! Always cool, and a fantastic leader. I forgot about her becoming supreme leader though, so you know what that meeeeeaans- time for a rewatch. Anyway, her relationship with Cree was so interesting and sad like come on, we were homies! It doesn't have to be this way! 😭😭 Especially because even though Cree was "evil" my young self has a crush on her 🤣.

Anyway the commentary on growing up and becoming old and boring caught me for a while, so I made sure I had as much fun as I could. But then they showed Maurice's episode and I was ready to take on the world. Anything to remain a cool agent of the KND. That being said everyone should give that show a try, it's old but still funny. Think I'll start it again for the Eleventynth time

[rrosamariaa]

I've been thinking a lot about a remus/sirius Ministry of Magic office AU..

Often I see ppl talking about what would Sirius work with if there wasn't a war going on and he could just live his life in peace and one of my favorite headcanons is that he would be an 'Unspeakable'. Those are the ppl that work in the department of mysteries, that by itself is one of coolest things in the wizarding world, according to me. The department of mysteries is responsible for confidential studies of death, love, time etc (A lot of crazy things that honestly no one should have to mess with but obvs they do anyways...) It's high-level security place, no one besides the researchers are allowed in those chambers. No one even knows who are those researchers and what they do, actually.

Buut, its sirius we are talking about and the guy is a genius but also can be pretty reckless and, in this specific scenario, I think he would be a borderline "crazy scientist" so. He fucks up down the line. I don't know what he does, exactly, but it's something that put his and others researchers' lives at risk. Bc of that, he is sent to work in a waaay more mundane department: Magical Accidents and Catastrophes. It's a cool department!! Remember that first poa scene where harry turns aunt marge into a balloon etc? well those are the guys who they call to fix that. They even have a Obliviators division, responsible for changing Muggles' memory in case they are exposed to accidental magic. Those guys are full of themselves and annoying as hell, btw.

and I see Sirius being sent there, after The Accident. It's cool in theory, but most of the time it's puuuure paperwork and it bores sirius to no end.

well, guess who works there as well. Our guy, Remus j. lupin.

Remus isn't one to do field work so he mostly works in the Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee division (god I love those long ass names). Basically he comes up with stuff to excuse magic happening in the muggle world etc. like when peter killed a bunch of muggles and the muggle paper said it was a "big gas explosion". Pure paperwork. Boring as hell.

Anyway, Sirius turns up there out of nowhere and he is the office sweetheart. It fucking boggles remus mind, like. Sirius always goes to the office parties and seems to be friends with everyone but no one knows anything about this guy. He just gets there, a almost 30 yo with a bunch of obscure work experience and no one knows what he did before that, who his family is, where he is from and how the hell does he knows the stuff that he knows.

Sirius is great at field work, he mostly works directly in the Obliviators division and remus is really great with the paperwork stuff sooo they get paired up a lot. At first, they are a bit annoyed by each other (my fav wolfstar flavor). It's funny because they actually agree with almost everything but they just approach things veeery differently and so they are bickering all the damn time. And Sirius is a Certified Little Shit™ and is constantly doing things that drives remus a bit crazy. Once they had a case of a water fountain exploding bc two wizards were fighting in a public park and instead of obliviating the muggles into believing it was only a piping problem or whatever, he went out of his way to turn it into a sort of elaborate flash mob that went viral on tiktok. Remus spent the night awake documenting everything. He wanted to strangle sirius that day.

between late nights working and lots of crazy field work (thanks to sirius) those two end up getting closer and closer. Remus still thinks Sirius is a bit insane, but now in a I-want-you-to-fuck-me-into-this-desk type way. Sirius, on the other hand, doesn't let go of his previous research. I think that back then he would, specifically, study and experiment a lot with Love, in special familial love (yep.) The thing about those confidential dept. of mysteries' experiments is that they can be pretty... unethical. And that's the break point of their story: Remus finding out about Sirius research and finally wondering at what lengths did sirius went to understand something as complicated as Love and what the fuck he did to get banished from the department back then, and worse: if he ever used remus in those experiments. and even more worse: The fact that remus doesn't stop loving him even if he did.

A last fun fact is that they, at one point, would have an inside joke about that "MIB: man in black" movie, they watched it together one late night and sirius kept referencing it when he went to obliviate muggles and remus thought it was the funniest silliest thing ever

[pastry0w0rlord]

This One Really Missed

They would usually cook so hard with these games but they burned down the kitchen this time I'm afraid.

Lenght/Playtime:

Too short. Too little options. The flow chart of this game is pathetic and can't compare to the other 2. It felt like watching a movie.

Price:

Too expensive, my localized price was 8 bucks but I learned the original is 15 from steam reviews. If you really wanna buy the game wait for a sale, the price is unacceptable for this little decision making and 5 endings total.

Humour:

I only laughed out loud at one joke.

One.

And that was the Hat Man joke. Most of the jokes did not land this time.

The original games had this thing where the dark jokes regarding really sensitive topics (racism, homophobia, slavery, xenophobia, abuse...) landed because they had added context. Like:

- "I thought our photography teacher was a pedophile but turns out he is a white nationalist. That's not... better"

- "Uncircumcised men are gross because the media told me so, I am a teenage girl in late 2000s."

- Every straight person in school accusing Nicole of homophobia and talking over Ari because she got rejected when Ari is only angry that Nicole was mean about it.

- Jeffrey pretending to be a white nationalist, entering a straight club etc. not because his beliefs but because he desperately wants to fit in.

- That whole scene of Nicole's mom screaming at her under medicine influence about how she steals stuff from her medicine cabinet. Then Nicole, after a really morbid argument where she plays the victim to the audience, reveals that she does indeed steal her mom's meds.

- The whole route of Nicole bullying Jeffrey into being a school shooter got kicked off by Jeffrey being creepy in general.

and the list goes on.

The dark jokes had twists which made them funny. In Flip Side someone says something stereotypical or generally morbid out of nowhere and follow it with "I am not racist" or barely any acknowledgement. The biggest examples of this I can think of are the Turkish creep stereotype and the whole FYE ending.

They actually made an '09 game parodying the original. This game is what the series' haters think the first 2 games are.

The.. Feet Stuff..:

I swear it was funny at first, with social commentary and all. But then it kept dragging... and dragging...

Then I realized almost half of the game was dedicated to foot stuff. Cool...

Are the writers aware that all those minutes wasted could've gone to an ending with Jecka's mom whom she kept talking about in the first game?

Jecka:

They should rename Flip Side to "Pity Jeckainator 5000" because holy shit poor girl. The overall game was more bleak and sad than funny. Jecka breaks down sobbing multiple times and no one helps her.

Jecka's Father:

I don't know what they were trying to do with Jecka's father but none of his scenes were funny. In fact it was extremely triggering because I got treated like Jecka in the past by multiple people. Jecka is severely jittery, jumpy and horrified at the smallest yelling. She breaks down crying a lot yelling "don't hit me" and I do not see what purpose repeating her father's screaming at every scene with him serves if it isn't meant to be funny. There were literally times where I went "oh here we go again" and took of my headphones before he started screaming at her.

Nicole:

Guys Nicole is severely out of character in one of the foot fetish routes. I don't care if she is supposed to be a sociopath, that is not Nicole. Sociopaths can still separate right from wrong, they are still people so the "Nicole is a sociopath" argument I keep seeing holds no merit here.

Nicole has shown that she is capable of admitting to her mistakes in the prison ending of re-up.

Also lets put aside her mutual respect for Jecka and pretend Nicole doesn't know her at all. That still feels out of character for her. Think about it. Why does Nicole go after older men when she does?

- She is in danger and needs to act. (Coach Colby route)

- She has no other choice. (The route where her mom kicked her out)

- She is trying to get them arrested. (Her luring one of the faculty outside to get arrested)

Why would she, for no reason whatsoever, go after Jecka's dad?

You would argue that Nicole is a petty person from the Megan-Hunter route, but Megan made Nicole snap. She got provoked. Same with the Ari route. Ari was severely fucked up herself. What did Jecka do?

"I can't cut you in, I need this money Nicole"

That's it? Nicole already mentioned she was selling shoplifted goods as well so what is her objective here if not money?

Emily would do this(which she did), not Nicole, Nicole wouldn't bother. It's too much useless effort. They confused their own characters.

The Text from SBN3:

I am not gonna elaborate but that was so insane, wild and immature.

Some Stuff I Liked:

-Seeing Jecka's side of the first game suicide ending was cool.

-I actually liked the FYE route... until I didn't in the last 5 minutes of it.

-The Hat Man bit was seriously funny.

-The illustrations improved.

But yeah overall... Jecka deserved better than this game. I do not hate it for the small stuff I liked it for, but I will still try to pretend this never existed.

If you are here thank you for reading all of it. I usually don't do game reviews, I hope I didn't ramble too much