#but i cant help myself... i hate it i despise it

[kaserolly]

I'm trying to relax at the seaside rn but I can't stop stressing and overthinking at all

[angellurgy2]

^_^

[loverofallthingssmart]

just discovered one of my pet peeves is incompetency

[sadie-bug345]

greasers when they’re sick

i myself have been deathly ill for the past week so whilst i am bedridden i’m writing this🤡🙆‍♀️🤩 ANYWAYS LETS GO

ponyboy:

hates missing school solely cause my guy despises talking to teachers abt what he missed

also cause he thinks he gets super behind when guy just skipped one day of school😭

probably holes himself up in his and sodas room and when soda comes in to check on him after work it’s like PITCH black and pony is just sitting in a pile of tissues

”what do YOU want?” says pony with a voice similar to kermit the frog cause bros nose is SO stuffed up

and soda just assumes pony is in one of his moody, poetry reciting moods again and slowly exits the room, leaving only a baloney sandwich in his wake💀🤡😭

johnny:

def the type to not accept help

like he would go to school sick and the second someone brings up how his voice is screwed up he’s like 😐”what’re you sayin bout me?”

if the gang does quarantine him to a room he’d def just be able to entertain himself and prob come up with his own secret language and fictional multiverse or smth

idk he just gives the type to be fully okay with being alone for a bit but the meds he’s on make him all wacky too so it’s an interesting mix for sure

sodapop:

i’m sorry this guy has the most nastiest cough 😭

idc if he doesn’t smoke a lot he just got those mucusy coughs

other than that everyone’s having a good time, making jokes and feeling good and then soda pauses his laughter and unleashes the most rattley cough and then everyone just goes quiet and he just looks like 😃

definitely unfazed by sickness in general

until one day my guy just has the worst time and breaks downnnn🥰

we’ve all been there too esp when you’re sick and shit just goes downhill and everything sucks and you hate everything and everyone

darry:

now johnny doesn’t accept help but that’s NOTHING compared to darry

he has peak older-sibling syndrome and is just used to only helping other people

so when those people that he takes care of flip the script, my guy is just weirded outtt

like he def appreciates two trying to make him soup but he just doesn’t know how to react

goes lowk crazy with not being able to work or straighten up the house just cause he always feels like he’s gotta do SOMETHING productive with his time

dally:

i’m sorry but guy is def the type to go to school FULLY sick and either not say a word about it or complain like a lil bitch the whole time

also he totally smokes while he has a cough like soda which is so unhealthy i can’t even😭

just overall his habits and life doesn’t get upended by “some fuckass cold” (his words, not mine)

like bro please you just gotta rest sometimes😭

the gang is able to get him to stay at the curtis’ couch one day and bro just WIPES OUT

istg he’s out for like 15 hours straight in the full daytime and everyone is scared to walk past in case they wake him up

but dally is a crazy heavy sleeper so he actually gets a lot better after calming down for once🥰

two-bit:

honestly stays home from school like a normal person

except bro gets one cold and then just doesn’t show up to school for like two weeks😭

and it’s not cause he’s a wimp it’s just cause guy finds an excuse to skip out for a so called “vacation” and he rolls with it

and then he’ll just spawn back in on campus like a month later like nothing happened and everyone just expected two to take a dare too far and end up in the hospital🤡

steve:

CANT STOP WONT STOP

bro just pushes thru the pain😭

he probably takes way too much of the recommended dose of general meds (don’t do this please🧍‍♀️)

and then goes all loopy for hours straight

and people are kinda sus about it but honestly it’s steve so who is really all that surprised

LMAO THAT SOUNDS MEAN SORRY STEVE

ANYWAYSSSS i think imma post a romantic kinda sick reader x greaser thing so that’ll hopefully come out soon while im still coughing my lungs out🫶

[crguang]

ive talked about it before and im repeating myself really, but once again thoughts of miranda hating the MC are rotating in my mind… she’s in love, so desperate for it to be reciprocated because it’s all she has (miranda, apathetic and cruel, lives on hope alone. haha!) and every reset— every lifetime she lives without her love by her side is making her nastier. angrier. messier. she loves a version of them that will never exist again and as time passes she starts to hate every version that isnt hers. she loves them, she loves them, she hates them, killing them gets easier every fucking time.

i mean, it’s a “two sides of the same coin” situation where she loves them so much she defies the laws of nature to keep their soul tied to hers, yet she cant help but despise them for not being her first love no matter how close she comes to her goal. good ending MC where they glance at her quizzically when she says something in reference to a moment in the past that they should remember and her eye twitches, briefly irked.

there’s absolutely no way miranda doesn’t know or understand that her soulmate is gone. reincarnation isn’t cloning, people, time periods, environments in general shape a person— she’ll never have the happy ending she desperately needs and there’s just no way, to me, that this fact doesnt breed some sort of resentment towards them. i love it when she loses because i get to write her losing her mind☺️

[oliveoilsunset]

Oh why can I not hate you?

It should be fairly easy considering your actions, but for some reason I cannot hate you, I am unable to despise you. I am angry and hurt but I cant help myself to sometimes smile, and it just makes me angrier because why do I have so much love for the things that break me the most?

[forestenjoyer]

tw leftist meme

this is more of a vent post than anything so be nice and bear with me. i was feeling down earlier so i did some writing to try to get my thoughts straight, and i wrote this.

Every time i feel down, i wonder what it that makes me feel this way. And there are many things. Is it species dysphoria? Sometimes. Is it fear of the future? fear of never living my one life the way i want to? Dread of the increasing amount of people who seemingly hate my kind? Fear for me and the people i love? Climate Anxiety? Loneliness? Yeah, sometimes. But sometimes I can't figure it out, and there is a thought in the back of my mind, and it never goes away. I try to tell myself that some days I'm just not feeling it, and thats true. But sometimes i get upset because i cant really disprove the thought. I'm scared of capitalism, and I'm scared of the way it poisons everything that i love.

When I first heard the thought, i was a social democrat, and it was easy for me to just tell myself that i was being ridiculous. but after time, the thought dawned on me, and everywhere i looked, i saw evidence.

Corporations exist to make a profit. They don't care about us being satisfied unless it's profitable to them. When they get influential enough, people begin to become dependent on them. Once this happens, they can gouge prices for more profit, as they are doing now. What will the government do? Nothing, because more often than not, they have an incentive to support the company. Perhaps the company is a donor, perhaps they are bribed, perhaps the obscene wealth makes them look good by some measurements, or perhaps they themselves are a CEO.

So, right. The government, who is allegedly supposed to take care of us, the people, isn't going to help, as it hasn't. So it's up to us, but say this company provides a vital service and is the only one who does so at any reasonable quality (Google), or has people addicted (Meta, McDonald's), or has so much variety and power that avoiding it is incredibly difficult (Disney, Nestle). If this is the case, which is is, it's very hard to boycott them.and those who advocate for change or participate in attempts to force change are mocked and taunted by bad actors and gullible folk. And by bad actors, I mean people who defend the company because they too own businesses. Landlords, local business owners, and so on. They are middle class twats who have never had to suffer the struggle of a normal person. And yet they LARP as us, calling themselves everyday hardworking folk, but actually own a business or an estate and have never had to confront the fears of tenancy, homelessness, poverty, and so on.

And i despise these people. They pretend to be us, and trivialise our struggle, saying lifes not that hard, and even call us elitists and entitled, and complain about us. And they manipulate and lie like this and act like they suffer while they collect rent from tenants after their third overseas holiday of the year.

And maybe you believe in reform. I did too. But do you ever find yourself asking 'How?' Do you ever grow weary of politicians throwing you and your movement under the bus? Or failing to fulfill their promises? Do you ever catch yourself thinking 'this is hopeless'? What do you do when you hear that, or when others tell you that? A reasonable person would take it in good faith, consider it, and try to find its flaws. And if you really knew that reform was possible, or realistic, you could explain why to yourself. I never could. I would joke around and throw insults because I couldn't argue with it, and everyone else did the same. I thought 'those stupid leftists are so foolish' and said it was ridiculous.

And thats why I caved, After all, if you cant see a way for peaceful protests and voting alone to bring change, and have watched it fail to over and over again, is it not reasonable to turn to the ideas that can give you answers, that being anarchism? The government cannot ignore a riot like it can ignore a peaceful protest. And if the government cannot and will not help us, we will have to help ourselves and each other.

And this is only a small part of it. I hate how it has ruined and weaponised science and strangled art. I hate how it destroys the environment. and i cant stand the way it does so with such self righteousness and entitlement

[rachelcommitscrimes]

im gonna rant abt how much i hate the ghost eyes fandom (as a former fan) bc im just kinda mad rn

so uhh yeah major TW for s3lf h4rm, romanticizing mental illness, su1c1de, sadomasochism, infantilization, and rlly just anything related to that

(also sorry if this looks weird idk how to separate stuff on tumblr)

also DO NOT harass the creator or anyone mentioned here, you’re no better than them if you do that

——————————————————————————

ok so i read ghost eyes like 2 years ago but i stopped reading about the point where they were on that field trip. i still think it’s a nice comic and i’m sure the author is a cool person, also the art style is awesome. but the fandom is so fucking gross that i’m surprised more people haven’t talked about it. 

for some backstory on this, i used have REALLY bad depression and was cutting myself regularly (i’m much better now, i have medication, therapy, and i’m almost a year clean) i also stopped reading due to the comic severely damaging my mental health and i’m very glad i did. i was younger and immature and thought i could handle such content. this led to me becoming extremely obsessed with the comic to an unhealthy level, and getting severely attached to one of the characters (rudy) because i could relate to him at that time. i seriously thought that i WAS him sometimes.

i understand now that i should NOT have ignored the label and what i did was definitely wrong and if the creator is reading this i deeply apologize. i’m in a much better place now and i’m just glad that i was able to get the help i needed.

ok now to the angry part

if you don’t know what ghost eyes is, it’s a webcomic about a severely traumatized boy attending school for the first time and meeting a bunch of other severely traumatized kids. this comic has a crap ton of triggering/sensitive/disturbing topics (which is not a bad thing as long as you do it right) and like i said before, the creator has kindly put a warning before the comic starts stating that you SHOULD NOT romanticize/idolize/sexualize/kin any of the characters, do not read unless you can handle such topics, and so forth. now i know i should have definitely put the comic down before and not gotten obsessed over it, but i knew damn well enough that it was messed up to romanticize/sexualize any of the characters/things that happened in the book.

there are several scenes in which a character is self harming or harming someone else, and the comments will say shit like “nooo my poor bean” “awww baby don’t do that” or my personal favorite “protect the smol bean.” first of all, the characters are like 16-17, second of all, i cannot even tell you how fucked up it is that people see someone ruining their lives and putting themselves in danger and think it’s “cute” or “anxiety smol bean uwu” THERES LITERALLY A SCENE WHERE SOMEONE IS GETTING STABBED AND PPL ARE DRAWING THIS MF IN A MAID DRESS.

another reason i despise these fans is that they see an abusive relationship and start making ships/kinning them. as someone who has gone through pretty much everything rudy has gone through, i cant tell you how irritating it is to see people shipping him with his abuser or calling him a “cutie patootie masochist boi uwu” cause lemme tell you what-it doesnt feel good to have to put your health in danger and ruin your relationships with others just so you can get off somehow. ITS NOT FUN. the whole point of rudy’s character is to not romanticize someones fucked up mental health.

i could spend hours talking about this group of immature brats, but i’m tired and it’s a school night and i have a test tomorrow. i might add on if i feel like i need to but overall i really hope those immature fans grow up and realize their mistakes like i did, or get the help they need.

[aliaseclipse]

we were still kids

reading our texts from my birthday last year, it baffled me how childish we both were, how i let my insecurities show through the (not so) tinniest cracks. was i too much even from the start?

i remember how much i adored you and how excited i was to talk to you from the very beginning. but reading those convos now, they seem so trivial and silly, so unfamiliar and strange.

i was completely infatuated with you from the start. it was through you that i discovered now that i appreciate kindness and a good sense of humour before anything else.

but i cant help but wonder, had i gotten ahead of myself? had i thought too much of you, when you were always the same? what could have made me so blind?

life didn't end when we fell apart. my birthday passed once again, this time without you. i finished highschool and im starting college in one month. im better now, excited for the future i so long waited for.

and yet, after every achievement, i wish you were here with me. the you i loved so dearly, the you thats gone forever and only lives in this frivolous mind of mine.

ill never talk to you again. ill keep you locked in my hearts chest - a memory i cherish and despise. i dream of you happy, loved, accomplished, safe.

I know you hate me, maybe even forgotten. i dont think i could ever forget you. i dont think i could ever really hate you.

you were someone i once loved so much. im sorry these feelings of mine made me get under your skin, ultimately hurting you and creating all this collateral damage.

there was a time when i regretted meeting you. but now im happy i got to feel all these things, that i explored my soul in our love, that i let my guard down for you and you managed to do the same. i dont regret ever loving you jed, despite all the things that had happened.

ill write about you as many times as i need to ease my heart. this is the closest ill ever get to you now. sometimes i wish you'd read it all, other times this solitude of mine brings comfort in your absence.

[kiwitio]

I don't like my reflection.

But I also do.

I like looking at my eyes, brown like the tree's that keep us alive, shining with hope.

But I also see dirt, mud that stains your clothing, empty like the void.

I like my teeth, they look like bunny teeth and Vampire teeth.

But I also hate them, yellow like a citrus, crooked and rotting.

I like my nose, small and cute.

But i also hate it, blackheads and pimples forming, looking just a little too big.

I like my chest, not too big, not too smal.

But I also despise them, not small enough to be considerd a man.

I like my stomach, thin and flat.

But I cant bare looking at it, years of starvation longing there.

I like...

I don't really like anything about my body.

Scars and marks contaminating my body, underweighted and weak.

I can't bare looking at the reflection of a Monster I build in my mind.

But I can't look away, nagging every little bumb on my body, making myself hate myself even more. It pulls me in, nagging, picking and pulling my skin.

I can't help it.

Why would someone like someone like me?

With my looks?

With my body?

With my Soul?

I wish I could stop hating the Monster I created from my reflection.

[hiswhitelie]

Me a pre law student confession:

Do you believe that we forever carry sins weather that is of our own or of the people around us. I personally believe yes we do , i carry the sins of my father everywhere i go. My name represents the sin he loved most, the irony of age gap relationship in wealth is how fucked up there kids turn out and i belive my parents set me up for failure when they named me “lolita ardor” for the people who may not know what ardor means , well its another word for lust & passion so how cruel for my father to name me lolita ardor in connection to his desires that caused him to sin. My mother truly despised the name , she would wipe off my nail polish as a kid and whisper words gently and as i would ask her why she always called me by my nickname her face would burn in guilt , her eyes filled with the fire that i now see in my dear professor as his anger of what i had done.. what he caught me doing. Hearing my biological name drip out of his mouth in vexation for my actions. “ lolita; your actions are completely unacceptable” he stated after what felt like hours of him looking down against the ground , finally rising from leaning on his desk and walking straight to the seat I choice after his low but deadly force for me to halt. His eyes and words spoke two very different things. For the first time i learned what lush in a mans eyes looked like, sure i saw it when my father looked at mother but this was lust of a extremely dangerous game of the unknown. Leaning my head higher and higher to match his lowered gaze at me , i couldnt help but absorb all the views from the bumps rising across his arm weather from the absolute dreading cold tension flaming between us or maybe the odd breeze that was never here before. If you didn’t understand now , i was hidden from the world of sex or even the biology that surrounds its and now that i look back to this moment i realize that even the smallest thing i did were fulled with sexual frustration. Embarrassment claws at me in ways i cant describe, i question how could i have been so stupid to not understand but honestly provails that i wasnt truly think because all i could feel was the hot tingles that climbed my clit in frustration as my professor repeatedly said my name in a form of a debate of his next actions “ lolita if i ever see you do the actions of ….” Stopping in grunting in confusion of what his actions should be but i could care less i was so close to climax as i rubbed myself against my phone that layed between my thighs but everything stopped the moment he said the words that would create a situation that would last way to long but provided the best lesson law school could offer.

“ two options” he grunts

two options ? What two options … maybe my punishment…. I should be scared right now but i liked it. Tilting my head looking in confusion, his face crinkled in annoyance “ how can someone be so fucking intelligent and yet be so far from understanding the most simple things” draging his hand across his rough scruff that was always perfectly cut, clearing his throat he finally looked down grabbing a piece of my hair and rubbing it against his thumb and pointer watching my chest quicken and my mouth dropping ever so slight to release the hot breaths and noises trapped in my throat and then it all stopped. “Lolita, get out” his eyes switched from wonder to deep dark hate.

I cried as i closer the classroom door but not out of being yelled at but rather how much i wanted him. I was obsessed… either with the idea of him or maybe what he could offer me.

- his white lie

[youngpettyqueen]

DS9!!

two people sent me this but Sarah you got it first!

The first character I first fell in love with: Juliannnnn <3 he had an unfair advantage, showing up in TNG and having very good interactions with Data, I knew IMMEDIATELY upon seeing him that if I ever started DS9 he would be exactly my type. I am nothing if not incredibly predictable

The character I never expected to love as much as I do now: I'd have to say Odo! I knew I'd like him from the moment I met him, but he honestly compels me so much more than I thought he would. when they established in the first few episodes that he's the 'only one of his kind' type of character, I expected him to be similar to Spock and Data, so his intensity caught me off guard. and honestly, I love it. and, again, he's just so goddamn compelling. searching for his species, a sense of belonging, his history with Kira and with the Cardassians... I eat it up

also its just. very funny that a guy who looks so deliberately bland speaks like he's constantly on the verge of snapping and killing everyone around him

The character everyone else loves that I don’t: I honestly cant think of a character I dont really enjoy! I also dont know if ive met the entire cast, im just starting the third season literally as I type this, so for all I know new characters could come in that I won't care about. the only addition to the cast in the future that I know of is Worf and I know I love him <3

The character I love that everyone else hates: I dont really interact with any fan content of DS9, and ive never been into the tags, so ive seen very little of what people think about the main cast. I dont know if there's anybody who's generally hated, so hard to answer

in terms of characters who ive never seen any fan content for but who I love, that would be Jake! no idea what fandom opinion of him is, but fandoms tend to not enjoy child characters/pass over them, so I'll say him. I love him a lot, he compels me, him and Sisko are so sweet I love their bond. Jake's determination to be friends with Nog is also very sweet

The character I used to love but don’t any longer: so far I still love everyone!

The character I would totally smooch: Kira Nerys I am free Saturday night if you are also free I would love to take you to a romantic dinner on Saturday night when I am free

The character I’d want to be like: so far I'd say Julian. his commitment to his patients is admirable, I really loved The Wire for showing the lengths he's willing to go to to help somebody. I would also love to be that charming and slutty tbh

The character I’d slap: I say this with so much affection: Quark

A pairing that I love: Kira/myself Miles/Keiko they're so cute and in love and I love that the show takes time to show that!! theyre married and they have a daughter and they take vacations together and make out and flirt and have a sex life they feel so REAL. I love them sm

A pairing that I despise: I dont think I have one I despise tbh. like, of course any ship involving any adult with any of the kids, but besides that the potential pairings I can see are mostly fine!

[nomeniko]

5, 13, 30 for the artist asks :3

SANDY HELLOOOOOOO ur amazing thank u

5. how would you describe your art style?

hrm flowy mayb? ive always prioritised lines over other aspects while drawing, so if anything its more like i HOPE its flowy

iirc i remember getting comments abt my art style being chewy and bouncy, so if that counts!!

13. talk about a wip you like

ooooogh my god i was supposed to make a drawing celebrating mgrm’s 4th anniv last april b4 i lost all motivation for it. what SUCKS is that i still do like it 😭 i just cant get myself to continue

(right is the 2nd reajusted draft… my drawing process couldnt survive size consistency)

this was i think 15 hrs of work total? i worked on it for a few days straight, but at some point i ended up dragging myself to finish it rather than actually enjoying the process

this was the one piece that solidified the way i draw clothing now though, so im still somewhat thankful i started it in the first place. if u squint hard enough and try recognizing whoever each person is (i despise drawing hair), i was exceptionally proud of harukas and amanes outfits esp

less of work in progress more like permanently unfinished work, but it still tracks :3

30. whats something youre proud of about your artstyle?

same as the first point, definitely the lines 😋

ill be completely honest ive hated coloring ever since i was younger, so next best solution was to just work on form and lines as much as possible. basically means that i have to do as much studies as possible, just to solidify the line confidence (which was hard!!!! that was a few yrs of severe art demotivation)

^^old ish sketchbook page scan i found in my camera roll (i still do studies in a similar way now tbf).

the goal was to brute force my way into learning how to freehand, which i think helps w my line flow!! its my one source of pride atp

[morethanmeetstheass]

alright, let's do the lowdown of "where the fuck has suna been all this time." probably gonna be long so ill put a keep reading, but tldr: life got bad, life got better, im working on existing in fandom space again

SO. i cant remember the last time i posted, so let's start at where shit went bad. 2020 baby, the rona hit, i graduated college virtually, lost my job, and ended up having to move to another state bc new jobs were so hard to come by. started anew down here in maryland, though a little worse for wear bc i went from living with my 4 best friends to having exactly 0 friends. very isolating, no fun. got cats, one of them died, so that didn't help at all.

fandom-wise, iacon online was both a huge benefit in my life and a huge pain. a lot of stress and misery went into that convention, but a whole lot of good came from running it. i ended up getting the chance to do 3 covers for idw, which was a massive blessing. became friends with multiple members of the cybertronic spree, made new friends with other organizers, got to accidentally roast james roberts to his face.

but it was also very stressful, and admittedly, my love for transformers did a huge swell and then took a big hit. i spiraled into a weird pit of having no interest in anything, lost interest in writing my fic, and started exploring other parts of my life. especially when idw lost the license to transformers, because fuck, now if i want to do covers again, i gotta make MORE connections. i was just very tired and burnt out. started hating all my artwork and despising how i was drawing for validation instead of passion.

sort of accidentally became a prominent creator on tik tok, so i got to explore other parts of my life that got lost in the transformers shuffle. got a new job working remotely, adopted another cat, things were looking up. then my apartment had a fire and i spiraled again, even worse. my mental health still hasn't recovered. it is a miracle that my belongings, health, and pets were ok, but i didnt even feel safe in my own home anymore. still struggling with it almost a year later, even in a new apartment. its been hard.

but i was shuffling on spotify today and stumbled onto my blitzbee playlist, and i got a little twinge in my tummy. i miss transformers. i dont miss being completely consumed by it, but i want to reintroduce myself to the fandom, start making mecha art again, as well as other art.

and i swear on my life, i WILL finish my fic. even after all this time, i still read all the comments i get on roe, on aufn, and especially kwz. i see how many of you want me to finish it, and i want to too. and i will. itll just take me some time to reintroduce myself to the fandom, to get comfortable with creating out of a place of love rather than out of a place of need for external validation. roe was a passion project, and its so clear with how much it was loved. it was good bc it was made out of a place of excitement, out of me genuinely wanting to share the story, not just wanting the likes and kudos. and im feeling that passion again. not 100% just yet, but i am.

so yeah, thats the deal. life has settled. still suffering with post traumatic stress from the fire and trying to feel safe in my space again, but im improving. im finding love for transformers again. im finding love for a lot of things again, and i dont want to box myself into one passion or the other. im a lot of things and i want to give myself space to love all of the things that i love. and robots are one of those things, but not the only one.

blitzbee forever. i will die a dirty bee kinnie and a blitzy simp.

[poetrypolice]

Mutual

And I hate your guts

Even though I cant

You and I

We are the same

I hate your ways

And it hurts so much

Knowing that I hate us both

The mirror's image shows myself

And I cant help but see your gaze

You look at me, with dissapointed eyes

("Why am I so much like you? I fucking despise you")

The worst part is we look nothing alike

But we share what matters the most

I could be good to myself, say that I like you

(That I dont hate nor despise you)

But seems that I hate myself so much

That any reflection of me is a toss

Of reality, washing over me

Why cant I be free of your memory?

Why I slave myself to my hating towards you if I know its like hating me?

Maybe is a subtle way of saying

"My whole life is gonna be a hating mess"

You're gonna progress

Make your life a show

And Im still in the halls were I used to watch your every move like if I was in love

[ineedtobeskinnyhelp]

i’m sick and tired of looking at myself in the mirror and just seeing how fat i am. i started hating myself more and more each day. i despise food with my whole heart but i can’t seem to get away from it. i don’t know how to stop or when to stop eating. it’s like a game of being in control then loosing control. i feel weak n vulnerable. i’m pathetic. i cant even say no to food anymore. how can i when it’s always been i’m fat so why not eat it. i need to learn to discipline myself. all i need is to be skinny all i want is to be skinny. i’ll be… perfect. i’ve been non stop staring at pictures of nessa and i cant stop obsessing over how perfect and skinny she is. you can see her ribs her thigh gap her skinny dainty arms and fingers, her perfect sucked in face oh how beautiful she is. she’s truly an inspiration to me and that’s why i need to be like her. i’m going to see how long i can starve myself without any cheating. and keep you updated. if i eat i’ll come back. any suggestions lmk i need all the help i can get