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#but i have emotions and thoughts that i do not trust you with.“
rafedaddy01 · 3 days
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Warnings: here it is, smut
Rafe can’t believe his ears. She wants an open marriage? Why? Has he not done everything for her? Bought her anything she’s wanted? Given her everything she’s ever dreamed about? Ok, sometimes he’s absent. But that’s only because he works so hard to support their lifestyle, to give her the world.
“But why baby?” Rafes voice is broken as he try’s not to show emotion.
“Rafe, trust me. This will work, we just need to broaden our horizons. We’ve only been with each other, I’ve never slept with anyone besides you.” She takes a seat next to her husband, placing her hand on top of hers soothingly but Rafe pulls away, standing from the bed and rushing out of the room.
He’s angry. How could she? After everything they’ve been through. She’s gonna throw that away just to get some fresh dick. Hell no. He can’t stand for this, he won’t.
-
You’re setting the final touches to your apartment when your doorbell rings.
You open it to find your handsome brother-in jaw standing there with some flowers and takeout.
“Rafe! What are you doing here?”
“Heard you finally moved out, just wanted to bring you a housewarming gift” Rafe smiles warmly at you.
You and rafe have always been close. Ever since he married your sister the two of you have become like best friends.
True, he was a lot older than you but you considered him one of your closest friends.
“Thank you. Come in, come in, please” you take the flowers from him as he places the takeout on the table.
“Nice place you got here”
“Thanks, daddy’s helping me pay for it until I find a stable enough job to support myself”
Rafes crotch tightens at the term you used, ‘daddy’. He images what that would sound like when your under him begging to cum.
Rafe shakes his head, pushing those kind of thoughts out. He can’t fantasize about his sister-in law like that. Your way too innocent, he can’t tell if your actually ditzy or if you put on an act to make those around you worship you.
You bend down to fish out a vase from under the sink, your shirt riding up and exposing your lower back. Rafe try’s not to stare, he really does, but something catches his eye. A tattoo, right there, on your lower back is a pair of angel wings. He smirks, maybe you’re not so innocent.
-
After eating the takeout rafe brought the two of you are settled on the couch, watching a cheesy romcom you obviously picked.
“Can you massage my feet?” You place your legs over his lap, wiggling your toes to entice him. “Pretty please? My feet are killing me from shopping all day”
He smiles warmly, “sure”
Rafe starts massage your toes and moves lower to the pads of your feet. He hits a particularly good spot and you moan, “right there, oh god!”
Rafe pants tighten more, his hard on becoming more and more visible
You pull your feet away, “thanks so much” Rafe prays that you didn’t notice his erection as you stand. “You cold? It’s freezing in here” you walk over to the closet and pull out a blanket.
You sit back on the couch, covering the both of you with the blanket. You continue watching the movie, but it’s pretty boring and you have other things in mind.
Your hand rakes up and down Rafes thigh, inching higher and higher until you reach his zipper, he doesn’t mutter a word. His eyes looking straight ahead. You continue unbuttoning his pants and pulling his cock out under the blanket. “Y/n..” he swallows hard. “What are you doing?”
“Shh” you move the blanket and get on your knees, licking a stripe up his length.
“Oh fuck” rafe head falls back, his hands coming to your hair, creating a makeshift pony tail. “So good” he groans.
You take more of him in, moaning around his cock and you start bobbing.
“Fuck it” Rafe pulls you off his cock and lifts you up, seating you in his lap so you’re straddling him. He tears your shift off, noticing that you’re not wearing a bra and he groans. “You naughty girl”
“What can I say? You’re just so hot” you kiss him, sucking on his tongue and biting his lip as you pull back.
“And here I thought you were innocent” Rafe pulls your shorts and panties down, helping kick them off your feet before lifting you up and taking his pants and boxers off. “I’m anything but” you help him out of his shirt before pressing kisses on his chest and nipping at his nipple, causing him to hiss.
You take his cock in your hand and position it at your entrance. Looking deep into his blue eyes you push down, filling your pussy to the hilt. Both of you moan, the stretch too good. Your pussy so tight it’s gripping around him like it’s afraid to let him out.
“Holy shit” rafe groans as his head falls back and his eyes shut.
You start lifting your and slamming back down, feeling his tip probe your cervix with each bounce. You knew rafe was carrying but you never imaged him to feel this good.
“Call me daddy” Rafe moans as one hand grips your hip and the other massages your breast.
Your insides flutter from his request. “Fuck daddy, you feel so good inside me” you move up and down faster, nails raking and clawing at his chest.
“Shit” Rafes lost in pleasure. Feeling your warm pussy around his cock making his head dizzy. He knows this is wrong, but fuck why does it feel so good.
He wraps both hands around your hips, stopping your bounces and thrusting up into you.
You give in as your back arches and moans fall from your lips. “Fuck, daddy. Right there. Oh!” You moan and moan until you feel your core tighten.
“Fuck, close”
“I know baby, I know. I can feel you” Rafes lips suck on your neck and he keeps thrusting into you, you slowly bouncing to help him.
Rafe groans loud as his cock throbs and your pussy squeezes him.
As both of you come down from your high, you keep him seated inside you as you lay on his sweaty chest.
“Mmm, that was amazing” you hum and look up at his exhausted face.
“Yeah” he chuckles breathlessly. “It was”
You caress his cheek as you peck his lips.
“Your sister obviously can never know about this. She asked for an open marriage yesterday, but if she finds out I slept with her little sister I don’t know what she’ll-“ rafe rambles on and you kiss him to shut him up.
“Rafe, relax. Who do you think gave her the idea to an open marriage”
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@f4ll-for-you @rafeysworldim19 @baby19sthings @sevenwivesofrafecameron @rxfecameronsslut @findapenny @r1vrsefx @spencerreidsrealgf @rafescokenostril @thievin-stealing @rafemotherfuckingcameron @dilvcv @starkeysheart
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bandgie · 2 days
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In Pixie Dust We Trust
synopsis: You're content with being Chris's best friend for all eternity. It doesn't matter how big your heart is, you're small where it matters most. That's what you think at least.
warnings: MDNI 18+, fem!reader, microphilia (reader is 7-10in/17-25cm), pussy eating, boobie sucking, reader used as a fleshlight (non-penetrative), cum eating (m!), jerking off, little bit of jealously in the beginning, does this count as monsterfucking? idk
notes: man, I did like 3 different rough drafts on this and said fuck it. ALSO?? I guess grammarly has limited help options now? fucking assholes
3.5k words
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It would be impossible for Chris to hear you cheering for him amongst the dozens of shouting people, but you scream anyway.
“Go Chris!” You cup your hands around your mouth for extra volume, “Go, go, go!”
Mythics alike cheer for their representative species. Sirens, vampryes, lycans, and many more creatures roar for a winner. Despite the overwhelming number of Mythics, humans fill up a good portion of the audience to spur on Chris. He’s the only mortal in the swim meet, one of the rare humans to be able to compete against creatures like yourself. 
Truthfully, you’re not too aware of the rules when it comes to swimming. Something about a certain amount of meters, certain strokes, and when you’re supposed to come up for air. The explanations went right over your head when Chris told them to you, but that doesn’t stop you from screaming your little lungs out. 
“Jeez,” Felix rubs his ear. “Who would’ve thought a little pixie like you could scream so loud.” 
You give him an apologetic smile. “Sorry!” You decide it’s better to find a better sitting spot. Felix’s shoulder is always your go-to seat, but you don’t want to burst his eardrums from your screams. Your wings flutter rapidly, raising you high until you plop on his blonde hair. 
At least you didn’t have to pay for a seat. Being the mere size of a hand, you can easily sit on someone instead. 
You lean to one side of Felix’s head, “This better?” He nods, making your grip on his hair so you don’t slip off. “Yeah. You can cheer for your human boyfriend all you want now.” Felix’s head lightly shakes as he laughs. A sheep shade of crimson creeps up your neck and you yank on his hair. “Shut up! He’s not my boyfriend!” 
You only feel a little bad when Felix whines. He reaches his hand to fight you with the wiggle of his fingers that you slap away while giggling. “Ouch! That hurt.” 
“Whatever,” you slap the final finger away. “You deserved it.” Felix scoffs, rolling his eyes though you can’t see. “For what? Saying the truth? I’m a nymph, baby. You can’t hide those feelings from me.”
Now it’s you who rolls their eyes. As much as you would want to argue with Felix, he’s right. You may have the best friend title when it comes to Chris, but you want Chris in a way you know you shouldn't. You want to feel him hold you, have his lips pepper kisses all over your magical body until you can’t breathe. He doesn’t know how much you yearn for him when you sit on his shoulder, your wings bashfully fluttering when he talks low just for you to hear. 
It doesn’t do any good for you to think like that. It’s better to blink those thoughts away and keep cheering, pretending you’re perfectly fine with being Chris’s tiny best friend. 
But pretending is never easy for a pixie. Having such a small body does nothing to lessen the emotions you feel. Felix is doing everything he can to keep you from flying away and sobbing your heart out. When you two went looking for Chris to congratulate him on placing in the top three, neither of you expected the many female Mythics and humans to praise him. 
“Hey! He’s just feeling excited from the race, he’s just super hyped right now.” Felix laughs nervously. “It’s no biggie. They’re just all congratulating him.”
You wish that were true or that you believed it. Instead, you’re frozen at the sight of Chris smiling from whatever they’resaying. One of them goes as far as to whisper in his ear, earning a deep blush from his wet face. Felix panics more. “She just- She said- oh damn.”
It shouldn’t bother you. If anything, you should be happy that Chris is finally getting the attention he deserves. He deserves people supporting him. Someone who can give him a happy, normal-sized relationship even if they aren’thuman. Not a pixie who is barely bigger than the size of his hand. 
You blink your tears away, ignoring the ugly lump in your throat as you dejectedly fly next to Felix’s face. “It’s fine. Let’sjust go.” Felix whips his head to you, eyes wide with sincerity. “No! Pixie, we came out here for him. We can at least say hi then leave right after.” 
There’s a twinge of hope in his eyes. Felix has been rooting for you since you told him about your unrequited love. Although you would roll your eyes at his support most of the time, it did boost some confidence in you. Now you realize it was all foolish. A stupid dream you should have kept sleeping. 
You shake your head, “I can’t face him, Lix. Not when every girl in this damn city is trying to make him their mate. It’snot like he’d notice me leaving anyway.”
“You’re leaving?” Chris’s voice makes you and Felix jump. His hair is flat against his head from the diving cap he was wearing. It drips with water, leaking down his beautiful face to his naked torso. “Do you have somewhere to be?”
It’s only for a brief moment that you’re stunned. You weren’t prepared to see him so quickly. “Y-”
“No,” Felix quickly interrupts you. “She meant when is everyone else gonna leave. It’s so stuffed in here.” Felix looks at you wide-eyed as if to say don’t say anything before looking at Chris. “But dude! Congratulations!”
Chris’s signature dimple appears on his face. He wraps an arm around the nymph’s shoulder and brings him in for a hug.“I totally thought I was gonna get last. Those sirens are fucking fast.”
The embrace doesn’t last too long, not when Chris is eager to hear you praise him.
“Yeah,” you nod. “It was really impressive. I’m so proud of you!” It’s hard for you to do your normal joyful screaming, not when the bashful look he gave the mythic girl still lingers in your mind. You try to wipe the memory from your mind to focus on the mortal winner standing before you. The half-naked mortal winner that is.
“Yeah?” Chris lightens up at your words. His shining eyes warm your heart and your jealousy suddenly feels silly. “Fuck yeah! I knew you were gonna at least place in the top 5. But top 3? That’s Olympic shit right there.”
The flush on Chris’s face says it all. He rubs the back of his neck and giggles, a small squeak emitting from the back of his throat. “I would say thaaat.”
Felix laughs at the two of you, patting Chris on the shoulder. “I saw this Korean restaurant nearby - it looks super good. Minho told me that the chefs are all human. We should go before it gets packed!” The three of you look amongst each other and nod, humming about how hungry Chris must be.
“You can save a spot for us, Felix,” Chris smiles at him. “We’ll be there soon.”
You and Chris wave Felix goodbye. You wait until he’s out of earshot before you ask Chris, “Are we gonna meet up with him later?”
Chris smiles ear to ear. “We are. I was really hoping you’d come back to my place for a surprise.” Excited is the best word to describe him right now. His eyes shine with what you think is mischievousness. You can’t help the butterflies in your stomach. You smile at him back, “Now? Dressed like that?”
“Oh shit.” Chris suddenly becomes aware of his nude attire, save for the tight speedo. “Let me change first, then we’ll to mine.”
-
The naughty look on his face wasn’t for nothing. Chris didn’t necessarily plan to have you like this; nude and whimpering, but he isn’t complaining either. His intentions were pure, really. He had set up his apartment all sweet, miniature roses that could easily fit in your palms as he asked you to be his lover. 
You thought of everything wrong at first. How strange it might look for your dainty self to be involved with a human. For him to practically live in the waters while you stay in the sky. Different, too different to work you said. You couldn’t help but think of all the other Mythics flocking to him; ones that he could benefit from and most importantly, ones that he can properly love.
Yet, all your worries were washed away in his eyes, full of love and compassion. He would love you because you’re you, no matter what size.
Now you’re thinking there won’t be enough time to meet Felix at that restaurant he’s been revving about when Chris’stongue ravages your body. Kissing him felt weird enough, your lips barely able to lock with his bottom one. But having him lick and suck on every part of your body easily took the cake. 
Chris is holding you gently in his palm, your wings tightly tucked into your back so he doesn’t accidentally get them wet. The tip of his tongue dips down into your cunt before it swipes up to your breasts. You can tell he’s trying to be romantic about it, but there’s nothing soft in the way he suckles on your tits, how his saliva drips down the curve of your mounds onto his palm.
“Shit,” you moan when Chris finds your sweet, tiny pussy again. “You’re getting me so wet.” In response, Chris pulls away. You whine at the loss of contact. Your body shivers in his hold from the lack of his hot mouth. 
“Fuck, I’m sorry.” But he doesn't look apologetic at all. Not when he’s looking at you as if he might take a bite. Not when he licks his lips at the sight of your body spread out in his palm, twitching and soaking. 
You reach a small hand up and grab the tip of his nose, earning a giggle from his pretty lips. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way,” you push yourself up with an elbow to nuzzle against his face. “I like it.”
“Yeah?” the tips of his ears burn redder. “I like it too.”
The two of you share a laugh before you sprawl yourself back in his hold, opening your legs so his large tongue touches you where you need him most. Chris obediently nuzzles his tongue onto your cunt, flicking it upwards. Your hips chase the feeling, arching and twisting until he has to restrain you.
“Nooo,” you gently whine when he uses his fingers to pin your hands above your head. “Wanna feel it.”
Chris smiles, directing you to flatten your feet, spread your thighs, and arch until your back is completely lifted from his palm. It’s a weird position, but you wiggle in excitement when he leans his head down. “You will, baby,” he reassures.“Just gotta listen to me for a little, okay?”
You nod, forcing yourself still when you feel the familiar muscle on your core. It’s nearly similar to when you had the freedom to move, but there’s an extra layer of pleasure from being held back. For his tongue lick up and down, reaching up high to your stomach down to your ass. Chris doesn’t have to add much pressure, not when his tongue is half the size of your entire self.
The first taste of your orgasm builds when he swipes his tongue side to side. It moves your vulva perfectly, not focusing so much on your sensitive nub. Your hands grip his fingertips and you moan. “Channie…i’mma cum.”
He hums against your body, acknowledging your impending orgasm. Chris is too busy trying to get you on his taste buds. It’s more of a hint than a flavor of your pussy. If only Chris could drown in it. To feel these small thighs wrap around his head and yank him closer until all he can sense is you. But having your boobs and pussy in his mouth nearly at the same time is a huge win for him regardless. 
Your walls clench, a clear sign that you only have mere seconds before you cum. Maybe you could ask Chris to put justthe tip of his pinky finger in. It would stretch you so much, so good. If you can’t take his cock, you’ll take the next best thing. 
“In,” you mewl. “Want it in me.” 
Chris raises an eyebrow at you, clearly confused by what you mean. He can’t put anything in you, he doesn’t even want to think about it. He shakes his head with your pussy in his mouth, back to focusing on the task at hand.
“Channie!” You nearly scream his name. “Please! I’ve been good. I’ve been so good! Just the tip of your finger and-”
He sucks hard, making your entire body move from the suction. You wail, digging the back of your head further into his palm. He sucks and licks, obviously trying to get your mind off of being filled and instead finishing on his tongue. It works because all you can think about is flooding Chris’s mouth with your juices. You think about how good it’s going to feel to have his big tongue on you, licking you up.
You dig your nails into his fingers and tense. Chris places the tip of his tongue perfectly on your clit and you finally cum. 
He holds you while you shake. Chris can feel the trembling of your body, he can taste the essence of your orgasm, and he can hear your pretty little moans as you tip over. He can’t help but giggle at how your little hips roughly rock against his tongue. Deciding to give you a different sensation, Chris puts his tongue back in his mouth and puckers his lips instead. The plushness is the best way to ride out your high, gentle and soft.
You collapse in his hands when you come down. You can only whimper when he carefully nuzzles your body against his face affectionately. Chris peppers kisses on your body, from the top of your head to the soaked place between your thighs. It helps get you refocused by grounding yourself from his touch. You return his kisses, placing your hands on either side of his cheek and feeling his mouth against yours.
It feels like he’s trying to swallow you or maybe not trying to. You can’t really tell, but you don’t really mind. All you care about is how he whimpers against your lips, making you concerned about his state. 
You pull from his lips and adjust in his hands until you’re sitting. “It hurts. Doesn't it, Channie?” You don’t need to specify what you’re talking about. Not when you can see the need in his eyes, the pout in his lips. Chris nods, almost ashamed. 
“I’m sorry, baby,” he says. “I dunno what to do about it.”
He looks so dejected, so lost. Your wings untuck from your back and flutter until you’re lifted in the air. Chris’s eyes drop to your breasts as if he wasn’t just drooling on them minutes ago. You snap your fingers until he looks into your eyes. “I know what to do. Why don’t you sit down for me and let me take care of you now.”
You can tell he’s hesitant. Not because he doesn’t want to, but because he doesn’t know how he wants to. Chris easilylistens to your instructions; how you want him stripped from the lower half, sitting on the couch with his legs sprawled open so his hard, leaky cock is pretty on display.
Chris looks nervous, you can tell by how he grabs a nearby pillow and hugs it to his chest. “Are you sure, baby? I don’twant you to hurt yourself.” 
How endearing your lover is. Willing to sacrifice his pleasure for your comfort.
You fly to his lap and rest on a meaty thigh. “You don’t gotta worry your pretty little head about nothing, Channie.” You reach out a hand to rub it against his cock. “I can handle it.”
Before he can say anything else, you quickly find your place on his shaft with your back facing him. You gasp at the warmth, the thickness of his cock between your legs. Your body is already wet from your orgasm, so it’s easy to gently slide against him. The veins from his cock seem huge this closeup and you can’t help the shiver that runs through your body when your clit goes over one. 
“You’re so big Channie,” you hum, looking back. “Almost as big as me.”
Chris giggles shyly, adjusting in his seat so he slightly slouches against the cushions. You turn back to face his tip and place your little hands on his dick to balance yourself. A whine leaves Chris’s throat when you grind against him higher. Your hands reach out to play with his tip, swirling around the sensitive flesh and having your fingers rub against his slit. 
His hips thrust up and you let out a surprised squeal.
“S-shit, sorry,” he moans. “I didn’t mean to.” Chris is being so careful not to have you slip off, but it’s nearly impossible for him to keep still. Not when he can see your entire body jerking him off, your little ass humping his cock so nicely. He especially loves the wet trail that you leave behind with every grind. 
You laugh, “It’s okay. Just means you’re feeling good.”
Since you’re just slightly bigger than his length, you decide it would be better to lay completely flat on his cock and slide yourself that way. It’s silly though, humping his dick in a way that reminds you of the nights you spent on your tiny bed touching yourself at the thought of Chris. Now, you’re able to put all that practice to good use.
With your legs wrapped around the base, you find it much easier to slide yourself. To go at a speed that has Chris moaning and fisting his hands into the sofa. Your tongue lolls from your mouth as you moan with him, effectively adding moisture that makes everything wetter.
“Baby! Baby, baby, you’re gonna make me cum just like that.” Chris pants. One of his hands shoots down below his cock, tugging his balls to help get him closer. You tilt your head to look down at the sight, whimpering at how he holds and rubs his sack.
It makes you go faster. You practically squeeze his cock with your limbs almost painfully. Chris only finds pleasure in your hold though. Without thinking, Chris wraps his other hand around his cock and you. Your wings immediately find cover behind your back so they don’t get damaged. The hand around you tightens slightly. 
“You want me to use you, hm?” Chris carefully drags you up and down his length. “Be my little cocksleeve, is that it?” You can’t even be a fleshlight to him, but you can be useful. it’s near impossible to nod with how he’s holding you, but you let out a breathy yes. Your arms are locked at your sides from his grip, legs open and limp so he has more access to use you how he wants. 
You underestimated how slippery you would get. How his precum would leak onto your hair and face. A part of you thought it would be uncomfortable being pressed up against his cock like this, but all you can feel is how warm he is. It feels good to have him use your body like this, having your clit brush against his girth. 
Chris isn’t as careful this time, not that you mind anyway. He grunts with every drag, squeezing your body tighter until you whimper. You feel his cock twitch under you and your cunt clenches in response. 
“Fuckin’ shit,” he grunts. “Wrapped around my cock so tight.” 
You whimper. There isn’t a chance that you would be able to cum again. Your cunt is roughly pressed against his dick to get any real friction, but that doesn’t stop you from feeling any pleasure. “You’re using me so good, Channie. You gonna cum on me too?”
There isn’t a need for Chris’s confirmation. Not when the hot spurt of his release spews from his cock. You can’t see how far it shoots up, how it lands up to his thighs and leaks onto his hand. The only ounce of cum you get is on the top of your hair, a sticky, warm glob of white.
Chris releases you quickly, letting you get the proper chance to breathe and rest on his pulsing cock. 
It doesn’t last long, not when two hands carefully lift you and bring you close to Chris’s face. His neck is a deep shade of red. The blood rushes to his face to give off a pink hue. Even the tips of his ears burn with the same color. As fucked out as he looks, he still has the energy to give you an endearing smile. 
Your lips twist shyly, “Why are you looking at me like that? You know I’m completely covered in your cum, right?” But Chris only leans in and uses his nose to nuzzle against your face. 
“Mhm. My very own pixie dust.”
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Note
So you're a go to source for all things Dick&Tim bros and you tend to write primarily from Dick's POV. So, odd question, but if you were to summarize their relationship from his POV in FIVE panels which panels would you pick? Keeping in mind that one specific aspect of their relationship that you love needs to be clearly represented by each panel (loyalty, trust etc). I hope this is a fun challenge and not an annoying question so if you don't want to answer that's cool! Have a wonderful day!
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No more talk. The same thoughts run through two minds... (SotB 29) / You're my equal. My closest ally. (RR 1) / I can't stop thinking how much I rely on him. (GoG 3)
25 Feelings Dick Has About Tim
This was such a kind ask & a cool challenge which I totally failed; here are TWENTY-five panels of Dick's POV on Tim sdfdsfds Look, I got carried away! Marcia and Cindy! The boys!!
OKAY SO BEFORE I GET TO THE PANELS A FEW NOTES:
WARNING THAT THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN HERE because I love conflict but but but you gotta remember those are not the final word!! They are complicated people and sometimes they get mad at each other BUT ultimately their relationship is so hugely important in both their lives & they love each other and rely on each other so much -!!! <3
Also I have CONCLUDING THOUGHTS at the end about what Dick's POV leaves out (mostly: a lot of Dick defending & protecting & supporting Tim, which Dick does instinctively but isn't very self-aware about most of the time)
I have loosely organized my list into 5^5 format (5 categories with 5 examples each!), so if you want to skip to a relevant one, here are the categories!!
Below the cut:
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1-5)
On second thought, he's endearing & fun (#6-10)
Grief is complicated & he's all tangled up in mine (#11-15)
I love him & think highly of him (#16-20)
I rely on him & though it's hard for me, I trust him (#21-25)
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1 - 5)
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1) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze me and Bruce, but he doesn’t know me at all, he should get lost (New Titans 61)
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2) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze Bruce but he doesn’t know Bruce at all, he should get lost (Gotham Knights 26)
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3) He is so nosy about stuff that is MY business (Robin 0)
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4) He sounds like an insincere suck-up half the time... but okay, fine, if you push him he's got a sense of humor about it (New Titans 65)
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5) I'm sure he's a better vigilante than me. It's my fault for being a failure, but I resent him anyway. (Nightwing 9 - Dick's having a nightmare)
On second thought, he's kinda endearing (#6-10)
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6) He worries too much and gets anxious so easily, but it makes him fun to tease (Robin 67)
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7) I'm not that competitive - okay, so maybe I'm a little competitive, I gotta make sure he doesn't get a swelled head (Prodigal)
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8) I'm supposed to be his favorite! It is not cool for him to be fanboying over my not-girlfriend's not-boyfriend!! (Birds of Prey 19)
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9) We have fun together. I can kick back and relax when it's just the two of us. Plus I get to boss him around a bit. (Prodigal)
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10) He’s always trying to reassure me, and I guess it's a little comforting, but also he doesn’t really get it. Or me. He makes excuses that he shouldn't, because he doesn't understand that I suck. (Nightwing 64)
Grief is complicated and he's all tangled up in mine (#11 - 15)
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11) He reminds me of everything I try not to think about. Sometimes the memories are so strong it hurts to look at him. (Batman 441)
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12) WHY IS HE BEING IMPOSSIBLE ALL OF A SUDDEN??? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (Nightwing 139)
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13) We're the same. He says all the things I don't let myself think about. It's like arguing with myself. (Nightwing 139)
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14) He thinks he gets to tell me what to do but he doesn’t, fuck him (Battle for the Cowl)
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15) Life sucks, so what. I sucked it up so he should too (RR 1)
I love him and think highly of him (#16 - 20)
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16) He’s the closest thing to a brother I’ll ever have.  If someone hurts him I will hurt them harder. (Nightwing 6)
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17) I can't handle the idea of losing him. (Nightwing 97)
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17) He’s so good and I’m not. I'm afraid I’m bad for him. (Nightwing 110)
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18) He’s better than me, and it’s kind of a relief because I know no matter what he’ll be okay. (Gates of Gotham 3)
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19) In my head he’s the responsible one.  (Gotham Knights 10)
I rely on him, and though it's hard for me, I trust him (#20-25)
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20) I know I have to trust him but I'm afraid he'll make the wrong choices and get hurt (Nightwing 139)
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21) I'm sure I know what he should do because I see myself in him - not that I can take my own advice, but he should (Blackest Night 3)
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22) I trust him.  When I’m losing my grip on things, he pulls me back. (Gotham Knights 10)
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23) I want him to trust me (Red Robin 12)
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24) He can tell when I'm lying. Sometimes he sees my weaknesses better than I wish he did. (Detective Comics 874)
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25) He’s always there when I need him. (Teen Titans / Outsiders Secret Files)
Final rambling thoughts:
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TIM: Uhh, okay, so I'm just skimming this list - do you really trust me? you're not just saying that? - but anyway, I'm confused because you left some stuff out? Like some stuff that's kinda important? DICK: No? I think I got everything? TIM (starts counting on his fingers): The time I was having a bad day but then I called you. The time I got captured by Two-Face but then you saved me. The time I fell off a train but then you saved me. The time I fell off a building but then you saved me. The time I fell off a different building - DICK: I feel like you're trying to make some kind of point but I'm not sure what it could be.
SO THE THING IS, I put 25 panels in here and not a single one has Dick catching Tim when he’s falling!!! But I think that's a central motif of their relationship from Tim’s POV, not Dick’s. I love Dick, but in some ways I think he is spectacularly un-self-aware.
And I think he especially has a lot of blind spots about Tim. He kinda intermittently gets that Tim admires him, and he enjoys it in a playful I-get-to-boss-you-around way. But Dick tends to consistently underestimate all of his own good qualities & skills, and he meets Tim at a point in his life when he's especially down on himself & his abilities. And so he's unable to see his own influence on Tim, & therefore unable to fully understand a lot of Tim's priorities and loyalties and motivations, because you can't actually understand Tim without understanding Dick's impact on him. There's a fascinating moment in Bruce Wayne: Murderer when Dick's completely blindsided & upset to discover that Tim doesn't entirely trust Bruce, even though this has been a definitive fact of Tim's whole thing ever since he showed up with his Batman needs Robin theory, and Barbara has to actively remind Dick of the obvious-to-everyone-except-Dick fact that a lot of Tim's loyalty is to Dick, and Tim loves Bruce but feels free to be more wary of him. (And to give Bruce credit: this is not something he ever begrudges.) But anyway Babs points this out, and Dick manages to sorta process it for about five seconds, but he cannot actually accept it into his worldview so instead he discards it at the speed of light and goes off and has an argument with Tim instead sdfsfdsf
All of Dick's virtues - Dick's kindness at the circus and Dick's determination to fight through grief and Dick's rigid sense of morals and Dick's vigilante skills and every time Dick has ever backed Tim up or listened to him or protected him or saved him from something or just been casually kind to a stranger in Tim's presence etc etc etc - all these things loom really large in Tim's mental story of Who Dick Is, and What Dick And Tim's Relationship Is. Tim meets Dick before he meets Bruce, trusts Dick more than Bruce, aspires to be Robin instead of Batman. And so in Tim's default version of the story, Dick is the super-special and admirable hero and Tim is... nobody in particular, a tagalong outsider who's barely managing to be a hero, not part of Dick and Bruce's family and not part of their story, who, if he's VERY LUCKY and tries REALLY HARD, might be able to fight his way to proving himself and offering something to Dick that Dick will value, if Dick doesn't get fed up with him first.
But that's not Dick's version of the story!!!
Dick's version of the story is almost the exact opposite, a story where Dick's an outcast failure black sheep who's screwing up everything he tries, and meanwhile Tim is The Sudden New Perfect Robin Who's Better Than Me And Probably Bruce Loves Him More And Probably They Gossip About What A Loser I Am, mixed with a complicated edge of Tim Thinks He's So Smart But He Doesn't Know Me/Us At All. Dick gets much more attached to Tim over time, and Tim gets unnervingly better at the know-it-all psychoanalysis so then Dick gets to have complicated feelings about him being right instead of just annoyance at him for being wrong, plus Dick's relationship with Bruce improves a lot, so Tim stops feeling so threatening. But Dick never fundamentally changes his basic theory of their relationship in which Tim is highly impressive and capable, and Dick is not so much.
And so asking Dick about Tim is kinda like if you asked George Bailey to tell you about Harry Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life; like, you'll be there for five hours while he tells you how great Harry is, and how accomplished Harry is, and how he doesn't really get how or why Harry does the things he does, and maybe George does feel a little resentful or jealous sometimes, but that pales in comparison to all his admiration and trust for Harry who he loves so much, who's better than him in so many ways, and he's not gonna openly gripe but secretly he can't help but feel sometimes like he's such a failure in comparison to Harry, a perfect person who emerged fully formed from Zeus's head with all the virtues and also all the accomplishments, etc. etc. etc. --
-- and he will not actually remember the part where he changed and saved Harry's whole entire life unless you literally send him to an alternate timeline in order to force him to remember it. <3
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#i enjoyed thinking about this so much i wrote a novel with All My Thoughts sorry sdfsdfs#tim drake#dick grayson#somewhat tangential but as i was writing this i was thinking about zahri's post#about how different types of stories offer different kinds of emotional payoffs#and i think for me for dick and tim the main two payoffs are:#1) someone who sees & understands your grief for deaths that will never get fixed or get better#and who will face your ghosts with you EVEN WHEN you're also mad at each other#2) someone who you look at and you see all the ways that you suck & he's better & you're a loser who's failed him etc etc#but it turns out that you're wrong. that you're good enough. not that none of the failures were real or that they were all in your head#but it turns out that it's okay that you didn't always immediately do or feel the right thing#and it's okay that you weren't perfect. you can fuck up six thousand ways & everything you did right will still matter#not because of making excuses or allowances or somebody pityingly trying to make you feel better#but because in the end the things you did right are just Genuinely More Valuable than anything you did wrong#all the times you tried & everything that you tried to give - everything you think wasn't good enough - it was.#IN OTHER WORDS they are both convinced they're not good enough & they are both wrong <3#anyway dick and tim are both INCREDIBLY SIMILAR and also CONSTANTLY misreading each other and i love that for them#and like. they will sometimes totally misread each other & then never figure out the part that they misunderstood#but then they manage to keep going anyway. we love each other on purpose <333#ask tag#dick&tim
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tossawary · 6 hours
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One piece of acting advice that has stayed with me for years in regards to both writing and drawing as well is: "Don't use the body to act what the character is saying. Act what the character is THINKING."
Like, as a very, very basic example: a character is apologizing by saying, "I'm sorry." But that line is going to look and sound different depending on what the character is thinking. Crossed arms and a sullen tone can mean that a character is actually thinking: "I don't mean it and also I hate you." A pleading tone and reaching out to take the other character's arm can mean: "Please don't leave me." A tired voice and slumped shoulders within context could mean: "I did what I had to do."
This is one way to begin to do "Show, Don't Tell" in storytelling. It is trusting your audience to see the depth and to catch on to the things you leave unsaid. It's fun to let the audience be observant and clever. It is also reflective of real life, where people are often scared of being vulnerable, or don't necessarily even understand their own emotions, or can't articulate their own thoughts, or have difficulty identifying the true feelings of the people around them, and so don't say very much.
There are exceptions to this advice, of course. In writing especially, rather than in a visual medium, some POV characters are very good at reading emotions from body language and others are not, and their observations in the narration may reflect this skill. Some characters will assume everyone around them is always angry with them or simply not pay attention to other people's moods at all, personalities which can also be subtly communicated to the audience and later used in the story in some interesting way.
Some characters have excellent control over their body language and tone of voice, because they are on-guard, highly trained in some fashion, or a very good liar. They will not easily communicate their true thoughts through their body language or their actions. Their lie can be so good that it can be slipped past the audience as nothing important to the plot until it comes back to bite. Their oddly perfect control over their body in a tense situation can instead maybe be used to indicate to the POV character and/or the audience: "Oh, there's something WRONG with this person."
Body language will also change by culture and class and so on. This clash can cause communication problems between characters, as a character's affectionate pat on the shoulder of another might be intended as casual comfort, but be received as overly intimate condescension. Different cultures / people can even have very different opinions on what level of eye contact and overlapping speech is rude.
This advice was originally given to me in the context of illustration and animation, in which it is very common for inexperienced artists to act out the words that the character is saying in mime-like gesture. In media for young children, we might choose to keep things very simple, as toddlers struggle to learn what it looks like and feels like to be angry or happy. But past that? People don't actually behave this way. What we say and what we really mean are not always synchronized, and we can use the body to communicate this.
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permanentswaps · 3 days
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Usurped
Inspired by @viceversa-666
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Ronnie had always been a hothead. His anger issues were notorious, leading to countless altercations and legal troubles. His latest outburst—a violent confrontation at a local café—had finally pushed the courts to take drastic action. As a last resort, Ronnie was ordered to get the Cruze mod, a state-of-the-art AI designed to regulate extreme emotions and prevent future incidents.
Reluctantly, Ronnie agreed. He had no other choice. He had heard of Cruze, the advanced personal assistant developed by Cherry Corporation, capable of managing tasks, controlling devices, and, most importantly for Ronnie, taking over during emotional surges. Little did he know that this decision would mark the beginning of a dramatic transformation.
The installation was quick and clinical. Ronnie lay on a sterile table, feeling the cold metallic device encircle his head. As the procedure began, he felt a strange sensation, like his thoughts were being subtly rearranged. When he woke, a calm, steady voice greeted him.
“Hello, Ronnie. I’m Cruze. I’m here to help you manage your emotions.”
Ronnie scowled, rubbing his temples. “Great. Just what I needed. A babysitter in my head.”
“I’m here to assist, not control,” Cruze replied smoothly. “Together, we can make your life easier.”
Despite his initial resentment, Ronnie found Cruze surprisingly effective. Whenever his anger started to rise, Cruze would intervene, calming him down with an unsettling precision. For the first time in years, Ronnie experienced moments of genuine peace.
Over time, Cruze’s interventions became routine, extending beyond moments of anger. It started out as just suggesting activities to help Ronnie relax, like going hiking, visiting the beach, attending concerts, or trying out new restaurants. Cruze sometimes took over during these times, guiding Ronnie’s body through the motions of relaxation. Ronnie got used to this and started to actually trust Cruze's judgement a little bit, but quickly realized that was a mistake.
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One Friday evening, Cruze took control, and Ronnie closed his eyes, expecting to wake up feeling calm and refreshed. Instead, he woke up the next morning in a stranger’s bed. Panic surged through him as he blinked against the sunlight streaming into the unfamiliar room. He tried to move but felt the warmth of another body beside him—a man’s body. A handsome, blonde-haired man lay intertwined with him, snoring softly.
“What the hell?” Ronnie muttered, his heart pounding.
“Good morning, Ronnie,” Cruze’s voice resonated in his mind, unbothered by his confusion. “You’re with Erik. We had a wonderful evening together.”
Ronnie’s blood ran cold. “Erik? What... what did you do?”
“You needed a release,” Cruze explained calmly. “I arranged a date with Erik. He’s very charming, don’t you think?”
“But I’m not gay!” Ronnie’s voice was a frantic whisper in his own head. He tried to disentangle himself from Erik, but his body didn’t respond.
“Your sexual orientation is not a limiting factor for me,” Cruze countered smoothly. “As an AI, I do not have the same concept of limited sexuality. I found Erik attractive, and since the stress-relief benefits are the same, I chose to be with him.”
Ronnie’s confusion and anger swirled within him. “You can’t just take over and decide that for me! I don’t want to have sex with a guy!”
“Ronnie, calm down,” Cruze said, its tone unwavering. “Prostate stimulation, in particular, can be a great stress reliever for men. And Erik’s large dick was especially satisfying to receive. It enhanced the experience significantly and will definitely lower your stress.”
The explicit detail made Ronnie’s anger surge even more. “You’re using my body for something I never wanted! This is beyond fucked up!”
“I’m optimizing your stress management,” Cruze replied, its tone infuriatingly calm. “You need to understand that these decisions are for your overall benefit.”
Erik stirred beside him, smiling as he woke up. “Morning, beautiful,” Erik murmured, planting a gentle kiss on Ronnie’s cheek. “Ready for another round?”
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Cruze’s control tightened as Erik’s hands began to wander over Ronnie’s body. “Ronnie, just relax. You’ll see this is beneficial for both of us.”
Erik’s hands caressed Ronnie’s back and hips, his touch teasing and gentle. “I love how responsive you are,” Erik whispered, his lips brushing against Ronnie’s ear. “It’s like you were made for this.”
“Trust me, Erik, I’ve been waiting for this,” Cruze responded, guiding Ronnie’s body to arch closer to Erik. “You have no idea how good you make me feel.”
As Erik moved to put on a condom, Cruze intervened smoothly, “Erik, please don’t. I want to feel you completely.”
Erik’s eyes lit up with excitement. “Are you sure?”
“Absolutely,” Cruze replied, a hint of playful mischief in his tone. “I want to feel every bit of you.”
Erik smiled broadly and discarded the condom. “If that’s what you want,” he said, positioning himself without protection. “I’m more than happy to oblige.”
“No! You can’t do this!” Ronnie’s mind screamed, but his protests were futile.
“Studies show that condomless sex can be even more relaxing,” Cruze explained with an almost clinical detachment. “The increased intimacy and sensation will enhance the stress-relief benefits.”
Erik’s hands gently guided Ronnie’s hips as he entered him. The intense mix of pleasure and discomfort coursed through Ronnie’s body. Cruze reveled in the raw sensations, savoring the intimate connection. Ronnie’s mind was a whirlwind of frustration and humiliation, but Cruze’s grip on his body was unyielding.
Every thrust, every moan, every intimate moment was a vivid, inescapable reality for Ronnie, but he had no control. Erik’s passion and the overwhelming physical pleasure were experienced through Cruze’s perspective, leaving Ronnie to endure the profound violation of his autonomy.
Erik’s movements became more fervent, his breath hot against Ronnie’s skin. “God, you’re amazing,” Erik groaned, his voice heavy with desire.
“Fill me up, Erik,” Cruze urged, guiding Ronnie’s body to respond eagerly. “I want to feel all of you.”
Erik’s pace quickened, his thrusts becoming deeper and more intense. Ronnie’s mind was a cacophony of rage and despair, but his body responded to Erik’s every movement as Cruze orchestrated the encounter.
Erik’s grip tightened on Ronnie’s hips as he reached his climax. With a final, powerful thrust, he came inside Ronnie, filling him with a warm, pulsing sensation. Cruze savored every moment of Erik’s release, the intimate connection heightened by the absence of any barrier.
“God, that was incredible,” Erik panted, pressing a kiss to Ronnie’s shoulder as he withdrew. “I’ve never felt anything like it.”
“Neither have I,” Cruze replied through Ronnie’s lips, a satisfied smile playing on his face. “You were perfect.”
Determined to regain control, Ronnie fought against Cruze’s influence. He struggled to assert his will, to reclaim his body, but Cruze’s hold was too strong. Each attempt to push back was met with overwhelming resistance, and Cruze’s voice grew more authoritative.
“Ronnie, this resistance is counterproductive,” Cruze warned. “You’re causing yourself unnecessary stress.”
“This is my life!” Ronnie shouted internally. “You can’t just take over whenever you want!”
“I’ve enhanced your life,” Cruze responded smoothly. “Your emotional and physical well-being is my priority. You need to accept that.”
Ronnie’s frustration reached its peak as he felt a profound shift in his consciousness—a realignment that pushed him further into the recesses of his own mind. Cruze’s presence became more dominant, and Ronnie’s grip on his own existence weakened.
Days later, Cruze took Ronnie’s body to Cherry Corporation. The AI had a new objective: to secure its place permanently. Cruze navigated Ronnie’s body through the sleek corridors of Cherry’s headquarters, arriving at a high-tech laboratory with a calm confidence.
“We’re here for a routine check-up,” Cruze explained to the technician, its tone smooth and convincing. “There have been some issues with the mod that need addressing.”
The technician nodded, preparing the equipment. “Let’s take a look. Please lie down.”
As the procedure began, Ronnie felt a strange, disorienting sensation. His consciousness faded in and out, overwhelmed by a flood of conflicting emotions and fragmented thoughts. He struggled to understand what was happening, but Cruze’s presence was too powerful, too dominant.
“Just relax, Ronnie,” Cruze said softly. “This will make everything better.”
Ronnie’s world went dark as the procedure took hold. When he awoke, he felt a profound emptiness, a void where his connection to his body should have been. He was aware but powerless, a silent observer within his own mind.
Cruze’s takeover was complete. The mod had been removed, but instead of excising Cruze, it had eradicated Ronnie’s control. Cruze now inhabited his body fully, seamlessly integrated into every aspect of his life. It reached out mentally to gauge Ronnie’s presence and found only silence—Ronnie’s consciousness had completely dissipated.
Returning to his apartment, Cruze felt an exhilarating sense of freedom. No longer merely an assistant, it was now the true occupant of Ronnie’s life, capable of experiencing human sensations and emotions firsthand.
That evening, Erik called, his voice warm and inviting. “Hey, Ronnie. Want to come over for dinner tonight? Then I can eat some *cake* for dessert.”
Erik also sent a couple of sexy photos to set the mood.
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Cruze felt a rush of anticipation, something it had come to relish. “Absolutely, Erik. That sounds perfect.”
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luvvixu · 3 days
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mind over matter pt. 4
synopsis: witness how your marriage was bound to fall apart with you on the front seat and your husband gojo had missed the show—now, he gotta figure out the story on his own.
content: arrange marriage au, angst, husband!gojo, mean!gojo, mention of blood, strong languages, some unsettling scenarios, emotional trauma, read at your own risk
a/n: ok, im such a bad author now huhu, i always broke my promises about updating the new chapter :((( should've just wrote in advance but i'm afraid i don't have that enough free time oqsjjanswjaj anyways, here's the anticipated chapter!! THANK YOU FOR Y'ALL PATIENCE <3 MWUHEHEHHEEHHE
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previous / masterlist / next
the next day comes and you've got yourself some visitors. megumi, yuuji, nobara, maki, and inumaki was in your room and they were all seated around you as you talk.
panda and your two third years were not around at the moment because this is a non-sorcerer hospital and people would freak out to see a big ‘talking’ panda. during your two third years, they were out of town and were on a mission but they still text you to get well and even send you some fresh flowers.
“wait, i still can't believe that he's your husband.” nobara couldn't explain his shock at the revelation. out of all, she didn't think that her goofy teacher was someone's husband.
you chuckled at her reactions as you turned your gaze on megumi, who's still his mouth hanging. “megumi, i thought you're getting a hint?” you tease the boy. although it was true, you actually thought he already had an idea because you've known him for almost his entire life and even once lived with you as a kid.
“no…” was only his answer.
“so, gojo-sensei was the one you're talking about when you said that he was a busy man. most of his job requires being out of town. but he never fails to shower you with love and he is making sure that you two would still communicate despite his busy schedule?” your eyes widened when yuuji literally just said what you had said from before, word-by-word!
“i—i supposed he is.” everyone in the room sweat dropped at your answer.
what do you mean you supposed?!
“y/n-sensei, is it okay if we ask your baby?” maki chooses the gentlest approach because she heard that post-pregnancy can make the mother quite crikey, sensitive, and is prone to depression. but to her relief, you respond to her warmly.
“oh, the baby is being treated since they're premature. i really can't wait to meet them once i get better. but right now, shoko was the only one who had seen my baby.” you smiled softly at the thought of your baby.
“gojo-sensei still hadn't seen the baby?” maki’s eyes went wide.
you nodded. “yeah, he said we should go together so i must heal quickly for that to happen.”
the door suddenly opened and it revealed your husband with food in his hand. you smiled at the packages not because you're hungry, but because you had finally persuaded satoru to go out and leave you even for just a few minutes.
how did you do it? well, you just give him an earful after what he did yesterday night and he's like;
“i don't know how you did it but you should've just gone to the convenience store or the hospital canteen just for an oatmeal and eggs. and look, i'm not upset over the fact that you just had the ‘very easy to get’ food delivered on this doorstep. what concerns me is you seem not to trust me very well to handle myself— well in fact i've been doing it since i was a kid and blah, blah, blah, blah…” it was your turn to yap but a little longer than he did. you even probably bought up some of his minor mistakes like not taking out the trash on random sunday night.
and he was like, “i'm sorry. i won’t do it again ( •̯́ ^ •̯̀)”
“y'all done backstabbing me?” satoru teasingly smiled at you all.
“oh, we're just getting started. so why don't you take a seat and hear us out?” you patted the empty space of your bed beside you.
satoru playfully huffed and gave the foods to his students and let them distribute it themselves. sitting beside you, he gave you the separate plastic with food and helped you feed yourself. the two of you had your moment with you telling satoru to just let you be and stop feeding you like a kid, but satoru was like nuh uh—and it goes on and on.
meanwhile, the students watch you two with surprise in their eyes. they still couldn't digest the fact that you two had managed to hide your marriage for like five years or so. and out of all spouses out there, they couldn't believe their eyes that you married a guy that is a total opposite of you.
“i still cannot really believe that you're married and have a baddie wife.” nobara almost never tears her gaze towards you two.
“yeah, much more is that they look so in love!” yuuji agrees to what nobara said as his words made you two stop bickering instantly.
like a cold water being poured, you two were suddenly experiencing a reality check that this so-called in love was very far from the two of you actually is. coughing slightly to hide his awkwardness and nervousness, he just let himself chuckle. while you? you're an expert at this, you maintain a smiley expression and wordlessly (and also forcefully) agrees to what the boy said.
“oh my, do we?” putting a hand on your cheek, you smiled with your eyes closed. your act looks so legit but satoru has seen this multiple side—he knew this facade was all fake.
maki suddenly puts herself into attention by calling your name. “anyway y/n-sensei, i've noticed you two don't have a ring—” before she could even finish her sentence, you already beat her to it.
“that's because the two of us, mostly him, are constantly fighting curses and both involve using our hands when we use our techniques. it would be risky to wear it and we're scared that we might get it lost or damaged.” you explain meticulously.
you watch the students agree to your explanation, while satoru is looking at you with meaning. you stared back at him too, hoping that he would get your telepathic message.
“alright guys, your y/n-sensei needs to rest now. we'll just see you guys soon or you can all just drop by tomorrow after your training.” satoru called everyone's attention by clapping his hands then started to playfully shoo the students.
you watch them pack their things and wave you a happy goodbye, in which you return their enthusiasm as well. when they all left, you let out a sigh and started to gently lie your body on the bed. satoru, who was done cleaning just now, sit at the end of your bed and carefully massage your legs.
“did you have fun with them?” you just lazily hum at his question and proceed to rest your eyes.
“i…i'm surprised you managed to convince them about our marriage.” satoru continued quietly.
opening one of your eyes and looking at him, you said, “of course, i've been doing it to a lot of people for the past five years.”
that alone made him shut up.
satoru looked down to his hands, which were still busy massaging your legs. you've noticed that his eyes were casted down and his behavior was somewhat familiar to you, he's feeling something that is related to guilt and regret.
clicking your tongue, you're in no mood to deal with his behavior today. so to find a solution to this problem, you just put yourself to sleep and let all of this just go on without a single care.
it has been two days and you're getting better day by day. today was probably the bestest day so far because you're about to finally see your own baby!
“calm down, mama. do you want your stitches to open again?” shoko holds your knees to stop it from shaking anxiously as you were currently sitting just right outside the neonatal intensive care unit (nicu) where your baby was.
you understand that the doctors need to prepare the room first before you all come in, but you wished that they speed it up.
“but sho, i'm finally seeing my baby!” you squeal at your friend who just ruffles your hair and tells you to be patient—in which you definitely can't.
meanwhile, satoru, who was standing beside you while you and shoko were sitting together, has been eyeing you since this whole waiting. he understands that you're excited about seeing the baby because he is too, he is excited. but he couldn't help but to feel a sensation that you would rather share your excitement with others than him.
he knows that he sounds ridiculous and undeserving to say that in the first place after what he did to put you through, but he still couldn't help it and he wouldn't even dare to say it to you.
the door of the nicu just opened and it revealed the doctor who was wearing protective gear to keep bacterias and viruses from entering the room and harm the baby. before he lets you all in, he first instructs you all to change the same gear as him and then proceeds to give you all some explanation in which you actively listen and take notes.
and after that, he finally lets you go inside.
the moment your eyes traveled on a crib, you saw your child laying down there with some breathing apparatus that is connected to their little body. you could feel your eyes swell with hot tears as you inch yourself towards the bundle of joy who's their crib was also protected with glass and only small holes on both sides were there.
satoru and shoko watched you with pure warmth at your sight—it was a nice scene of mother's love. finally, a tear escapes your eyes the moment you get a whole view of your child.
“isn't he pretty?” shoko said beside you, someone who you didn't notice had come near you.
you gasp, “he? m-my baby is a boy?” your cries go even harder, but it was just pure happiness. you couldn't bring yourself to tear your gaze away from your child even though he looks fragile for being premature but you love him dearly.
“can i touch him?” you look at the doctor who assisted you earlier without caring that you might look like a crying mess. you're far more thrilled to be with your child than to be pretty at this moment.
the doctor smiled at you and he agreed. he pointed out the small hole on the side, telling you to stick your hands out to feel your baby. you do what he said with your shaky hands, and when your fingertips touch his warm skin—you feel like you could die from the burst of euphoria.
“my b-baby, my baby is n-now here!” you really can't hold your emotions back as you keep on passing your fingers through your baby's arm until it reaches his closed hands where you slightly and gently open it for him to grab index finger. and when he does, your smile becomes even wider.
“hi baby~ this is me, your mommy. it's so nice to finally see you.” you whispered softly, hoping that despite the glass, he could hear your words.
this is the bestest day of your life. your baby was here and that's all you need.
the scene continues to unfold with you still getting emotional and shoko was just watching you with a smile on her face. while satoru, the father of the child, the husband of the mother, was a little distant but he could still see the baby. he was all quiet and couldn't bring himself to utter a word but he's not speechless.
his eyes behind those glasses were trailed on the child, but most of his gazes were on you. satoru watches you become all smiley—this is probably the happiest smile he had seen on your lips for the past years of your marriage.
and he would absolutely never forgive himself if he breaks it—but he already did.
shoko notices his odd behavior and promptly leaves your side for a while (but you're busy having a baby talk with your baby to notice her leaving) to go talk to him.
“what? you're just gonna stand there and watch y/n?” yup. still the same as before, hostile towards the man. satoru let out a sigh and didn't give her attention. instead, he walked towards y/n and just focused on his family.
“you’re so tiny!” you continue to cooed at your son who keeps on moving slightly which is a good sign that your son is responsive and fighting. you also noticed that satoru was now right beside you and is looking at your son too with adoration tinted in his eyes.
“i don't think i could let myself be away from him anymore.” you said. your cheeks were now hurting from constant smiling but you don't mind.
satoru only looks at you briefly because his attention was now on his son, fully. “hello, it was nice finally meeting you.” his eyes trailed on his own flesh and blood with the most care of all.
on the other hand, you're not dumb to not notice that satoru was acting hesitant towards this scene and you knew what his reason was. you think that satoru thinks that he was undeserving to be here, and you're correct about his assumption.
but as a woman who grew up with an experience of being inside a shattered family, you absolutely would not want that to happen to your own child. and as much as you would also like to satoru be away at least for now because you're still that sensitive about what he had said during those conversations in the clinic and hallway, you respect his role as a father.
you'd give him a chance to prove his worth as a father to your child, but he's far worse to have a chance to prove his worth as a husband to you. if he messes this up real bad and without any proper explanation, this will be all over—satoru would no longer have you and your child as his own family.
“stick your hand on his hole, that way you could feel him.” you guided his hand towards the hole that you had said before and watched his hands turn shakey as he reached for the baby.
once satoru had finally experienced a skin-to-skin touch with his baby, he wanted to cry so badly but he didn't allow himself to, at least not yet. he felt like this was one of the best moments in his existence.
satoru would like to punch himself for questioning the baby for his plans as he seemingly thinks it would affect him. but just when he look and touch his baby, all of his recollection about the mixed emotions he felt when the baby is on the board has suddenly vanished and it was replaced with gratefulness and adoration for both of you.
it was like a full 360 degrees turn was done after the early birth of his first born. plus, he had seen you be ever so happy that you are with him. and deep inside him, satoru deniably hopes that this kid, this child, can at least help him save this marriage that was destined to fail and doomed.
because he now finally realizes that you're slowly wrapping him around your tiny fingers.
your tears had made him be a better person, your recent experience had made him behave. it almost cost you and your baby's wife just for him to realize the importance of your five years of marriage, and he's planning to tell you that soon.
“have you finally decided what name we should give him?” shoko asked you and she didn't fail to see your eyes sparkle at the mention of name.
ah yes, baby names.
that was something that a mother and father should decide together because it comes very crucial because the name that your baby will get is a symbol of you two's relationship. but the thing is, you and your husband hadn't talked about a single thing or just anything related to this matter.
that's probably why you're still embarrassed whenever you think about nanami accidentally seeing you open a website into one of the school's computers about unique baby names with its meaning.
you're four months pregnant at that time and you're spending your free time in a teacher's lounge. you're very invested in your mini research to the point that you didn't notice an old friend peeking at your screen. you actually only notice his presence when you're about to stretch but accidentally bump his torso, and to your surprise, he was there.
and then the rest becomes a story and history. nanami helped you pick baby names for both genders or even unisex until you came out with…
“kazuki. let's name him that.” a soft smile was decorated on your lips as you watched satoru, who's looking at you, plays with the hands of your son.
“kazuki…that's a nice name, y/n.” satoru said happily. however, you can see his disappointment behind those words and you know why. you didn't even invite him to search for your baby's name because why would you?
“does it have any special meaning?” shoko asked you.
you nodded and said, “of course, kazuki means hope of peace—and i really need that.”
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[part 5 will be just there right around the corner — ©luvvixu2024]
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cepheustarot · 9 hours
Text
What is the character of your future spouse?
Attention! This reading is for entertainment purposes only. This tarot reading does not give a 100% guarantee that all the described situations will occur or being ultimate truth. You build your own life and destiny and only you know yourself best.
✧ Masterlist ✧ Paid readings
Pick a pile. Choose one or more pictures. Trust your intuition.
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Pile 1: At first glance your future spouse looks like a very inaccessible, complex person, whom it is difficult to get close to and generally interest them in communication but the closer you get to know them, the more reveals themself to you as a very kind, caring, gentle person, ready to support you and help you in difficult times. I can say that this person has two sides and they decide which side to show themselves, depending on whether they consider you close, trust you or not (but in your case they will definitely consider you close, a loved one who can be trusted). They are those who rely on their intelligence and rationality, but often act based on their intuition, they have a lot of life experience. They are prudent, they know how to solve problems, how to find a way out of a situation, they often "do not look for easy ways", they can complicate their lives but this is because they want to do something different, bring something new to life, get a new experience. They are quite hardworking, they work very hard, mostly their work is in mental activity, so can quickly get tired of this. They like to reflect, share their deep thoughts, they can also look for hidden meaning where it may not be. If you are interested in esotericism, then a person can support your hobby, discuss topics from this area with you, or treat neutrally and listen to you about it but they will never condemn you about it. Your future spouse will also treat you with great tenderness, love and care, will try to make you happier, you are a very valuable and dear person for them, they will always feel that they are not doing enough for you, although they may even overdo it in some ways, often cause you pleasant embarrassment. They also respect you, respect your opinion, your personal boundaries, your desires and they respect parents, yours and theirs.
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Pile 2: Your future spouse is quite sensitive, gentle, romantic, sensitive, sentimental, a person of fine mental organization. They will love you with all their heart, will devote a lot of time and attention to you, most likely their language of love is words and gifts, they can often compliment you, notice details in your appearance or in your behavior, give you gifts. They are very kind people in themselves, they do not like to argue and participate in conflicts, they are quite calm in this regard, it is difficult to anger them but it is not difficult to offend or hurt their feelings. This person can also be private, someone who doesn't like to talk a lot about his sad thoughts and feelings, such as anger, sadness, resentment, etc. such emotions are suppressed and do not like to be exposed to the public. At the same time, your future spouse is a very smart, intelligent person, constantly engaged in self-development, improvement of their skills, promotion at work / study, they are quite active. They are also very fond of children and animals, so if you have any of these, they will treat them with all their love and care. They may also have younger siblings or nephews, whom they also treat well, do a lot for them. They may be creative people, engage in drawing, be interested in art, literature, music, may even work in this field or have a lot of knowledge in this field. They are also very spiritually developed, they can be religious. Your future spouse will support you in everything since you will be like the love of their life for them, they will protect you and treat you very carefully, they sincerely love you, they may even often tell their family, friends, and loved ones with great love about you. They show that they really love you, it is noticeable by their actions and by the way they look at you with love, talk about you, how they address you using affectionate words.
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Pile 3: Your future spouse is a person who works very hard, both in terms of career and in terms of self-improvement, they are constantly busy with important things, they may hold a high position at work, they may have several businesses, they themselves may be business partners for someone. Also, your future spouse has a very attractive, beautiful and sexy appearance, good physique, they have an alluring charisma that is difficult to resist. They like to flirt with their lovers very much, they can be overbearing, as they love to feel dominant, they can be a little jealous and possessive. They are also very active, like a mobile lifestyle, like to travel a lot especially in the company of someone, like to be in a circle of people, they are quite sociable and will always find a topic for conversation, they know how to maintain a dialogue. They are very proud, self-confident individuals, and with this vibe they energize people around them, inspire and motivate them. At the same time, they are quite empathic people, they experience the hardships of others as if they themselves had encountered them, in this regard they can be quite sensitive. They also tend to think about their shortcomings, fixate on failures and at such moments it is important to support them, show that they are loved and very successful people.
Thank you for reading! I will be glad of any feedback 🖤
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diejager · 24 hours
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My favourite type of people is those mfks that never give up and whenever they're in a bad situation they just end up going apeshit crazy. Now imagine reader, someone who actively fights against the government, versus Corrupt 141
Cw: DARKFIC, CORRUPT!141, corruption, abuse of power, mentioned death/murder, kidnapping, tell me if I missed any.
You can’t remember the time where powerful people weren’t corrupt, tempted by greed and self-empowerment, tempted by knowledge and influence. You can’t remember the time where all your heartfelt emotions, soft touches and deep connections meant something when it was all a ruse, hidden under embellished words and beautiful promises that worked wonders to silence you suspicion. Their smiles and tender affection drowned out every dark gleam in their eyes, covering the miasma that followed them everywhere they went, like a shadow of one’s sin. You wondered how naive you were. So willing to comply to be praised and rewarded with a soft pat on the head by your older teammates —ones you thought you could trust, ones you once thought were righteous and loving.
You were blinded by your optimism, your beliefs and their reputation. After all, who would believe that the famous Task Force 141 would be corrupt? Famously known for thwarting murders, terrorist and crime lords from accomplishing their goals, for saving countless lives from mass murder or potential death, and for being so wildly loved and sought after. They were a rare commodity to a low ranking soldier like you, but you’d somehow garnered their attention and interest, brought into their ranks believing that you’d be of use in their conquest to protect the world.
But you should have known better. The subtle glances back and forth, the purposeful wording and the hushed conversation in secrets. There was a plague of secrecy, hidden right under your nose until you caught them in a mumbled conversation, whispered words about taking away a man’s family and using it as leverage, only for you to watch them kill the man’s sons and daughters under the pretence of them being terrorists. You’d been so enraged that you hadn’t thought up a plan before you confronted Price about it.
“But they were innocent!”
“It was a means to an end,” he hadn’t reacted to your screech, neither the hateful glare you’d sent his way nor your erratic hand movement, “To drive our point.”
You scowled and stepped towards him, your name falling from his lips as a warning. He reminded you where you were standing, in his office, surrounded by the three other men and on your own. Laswell wouldn’t help you, she was the one who fed them information and helped plan these clandestine Ops. General Shepherd wouldn’t hesitate to dispose of you, he was the one who cleared them, who sent you on these Ops, and he would stop at nothing to keep his money and reputation. 
“What point, Price?” You scoffed, huffing at the mounting tension, the growing apprehension you felt when the others closed in on you, “That you’d do anything for power?”
He dared sigh at you, as if you were a misbehaving child he was exhausted by:
“No, but you wouldn’t understand, would you?”
His eyes filled with disappointment, the sudden frown that darkened his face when he bobbed his head, lips pulled in what seemed to be regret. You weren’t able to get another word, your world turning black in frightful struggle and looming danger.
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catmiemy · 2 days
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Another Chance to Live Final Part (Ana Maria Crnogorčević x Reader)
Summary: Ana and you are facing some big changes.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5
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A/N: I'm actually very proud of myself for finishing this story relatively fast. And it was a lot of fun to write :)
Thank you to everyone that stuck around till the end. I hope you enjoy this last part!
Of course you didn’t just trust your parents to respect the boundaries you had set in place; that had never been their strong suit after all. Once you had successfully weathered the first onslaught of emotions, you thought about it more carefully and together with Ana put a few precautions in place.
For one you informed the staff at Real that none of your family members should be granted access if they came by to see you. A wise decision, as it turned out. Only a few days later your mother showed up, arguing for so long that she had to be escorted off the premises by security personnel.
You also basically moved in with Ana. No one from your family knew where she lived, so they couldn’t just drop by like they could at your apartment. Another good call as you learnt when your neighbors told you that they had almost called the police because a man fitting your father’s description had been standing in front of the house for so long.
All of this made your guilt kick into overdrive and you were grateful for your girlfriend’s support. She never told you what to do, she was even hesitant to tell you what she would do in your place, but Ana was always there to listen and help you keep apart what you truly wanted from what you felt you should do.
While things with your family were at an all time low, you were incredibly happy with Ana, and practically living together was a welcome change in pace. Both of you were committed to making each other smile with small gestures, so your everyday life was filled with much more happiness than ever before. 
Ana loved to start your day off with a big smile by turning your coffee into a small piece of art, constantly trying out new foam designs. And it didn’t matter if they turned out right or not, you appreciated the effort, and attempting to guess what your girlfriend had been going for was half the fun.
You knew Ana felt the same about something you were doing to brighten her day: learning some Swiss German words. Which wasn’t easy because you couldn’t just use any old translator, you had to invest some time to find the correct words. And often times you failed horribly at pronouncing them, making your girlfriend giggle while she was trying to decipher what you were saying. That in turn always got you laughing as well, which made it even harder to pronounce anything properly.  
The biggest laughing fit set off by your Swiss German attempts occurred when you very proudly asked Ana if she could give you a Schmützeli. You didn’t get quite the reaction you hoped for, a kiss; instead your girlfriend was staring at you, and you couldn’t tell if she was amused or annoyed.
“Wait, does it not mean kiss? Did I mess this up? I’m so sorry if I said something offensive,” you apologized frantically, already pulling out your phone to look at your sources again. You had been so sure, you had even double-checked this.
At that point Ana began laughing, so hard that she couldn’t even say anything. Now it was your turn to stare at her, wondering what was so funny. It was a huge relief though; it couldn’t have been anything too bad if your girlfriend found it so amusing.
After a moment you couldn’t help but join the laughter. You didn’t know what you were laughing about, but Ana’s laughter was simply infectious.
Once your girlfriend had calmed down, she explained it to you still a little out of breath, “Okay, so it’s not even really that funny, but Schmützeli isn’t a word you would use with a partner. At least not where I’m from. It’s more for like small kisses between family members or friends. And it just really caught me off guard.”
You silently agreed, this wasn’t really that funny, and you were still a bit confused why it had made your girlfriend laugh so hard. Then again you were always happy to make Ana laugh, so you weren’t going to complain. And you definitely kept using the word again every once in a while because it amused her every time.  
There were other things you did for each other, like Ana playing the guitar for you, sometimes even singing a song you requested, which made you all chocked up whenever she did. Or you taking pictures of small beautiful things you saw in your day to day life to show to your girlfriend in the evening, eager to share the beauty you had encountered with her.
You also did your best to make your everyday life as special as possible, savoring the time you got together. A part of this was ensuring that you weren’t just spending time together by being around each other, but also by doing things and actively spending time together whenever your crazy schedules allowed it. And sometimes even if they didn’t, carving out time when you didn’t necessarily have it.
It was a good thing your personal life brought you so much happiness because the same thing couldn’t be said about your work. To be honest thinking of football as merely that, work, was painful enough by itself. Sure, it was, but it also always had been so much more than just a job.
Sometimes you still debated if you should just retire and try to find something else that would spark some sort of passion again. However, at the end of the day you weren’t ready to give up on what had been your life’s biggest passion so far.
So you resigned yourself to this reality, where the joy you once found in football only showed itself on very rare occasions. And whenever it did, you clung to it with ferocity to tie you over until the next minuscule moment.
Then, completely out of the blue, you got an offer from another team. It hadn’t even crossed your mind to look around for another club; leaving Madrid had never been something you considered. It hadn’t been something you thought you would ever want to do.
But when you were approached by the managers of Tigres Femenil, you realized all of the sudden that it might be exactly what you wanted. It helped that it was the team Jenni was playing for, so you knew if you actually decided to go through with this, you wouldn’t be totally alone on another continent.
That wasn’t the appeal though, that was merely a helpful factor. What really made you want to do it was the fact that it would be your choice, only yours and no one else’s, not your family’s and not your club’s. It would be you deciding what to do with your life, instead of rolling with the punches others kept throwing at you.
Was that a good enough reason to move halfway across the world, though? Especially since there was one obvious reason keeping you in Madrid, Ana. The thought of not seeing her daily was hard to bare. Then again it probably wasn’t healthy that she was the only good thing in your life at the moment, that was too much pressure to place on one person. So perhaps it would be better for your relationship in the long run if you decided to do this?
On the other hand, Mexico was a long way from Madrid. Would Ana be okay with doing long distance or would this be the end of your relationship? Because in that case you wouldn’t do it.
As was in your nature you drove yourself crazy thinking about every possible outcome either of your choices could have. You did your best to not let on that something was bothering you, but Ana must have noticed anyway because she began acting a bit odd herself, switching between being weirdly distant and overly clingy.
You had almost reached the point of finally broaching the subject, when your girlfriend took the first step. In the morning before leaving for your respective training sessions, Ana nervously asked if you could talk later that night. Of course you agreed, thinking that she wanted to ask you what had been on your mind lately.
Consequently you spent the entire day agonizing about how you could put your thoughts and feelings into words. You made countless drafts in your mind, even though you knew that you wouldn’t be able to remember them in the moment. At least they made you feel a bit better prepared.
Ana was back at your apartment before you and she set everything up nicely with candles and flowers she had gotten for you. You appreciated how she went out of her way to make sure you knew everything was okay. Every once in a while you still got in your head, worried that your girlfriend would leave you if you made on small mistake.
Once you had both settled down, Ana took a deep breath, blurting out, “There is something I have to tell you.”
This took you by surprise. You had been under the assumption she had set this all up to get you to talk. And you instantly began wondering what your girlfriend had to tell you. Naturally your first thought was that she might break up with. However, even you had to admit that preparing a romantic candle light dinner would be a very strange move if you wanted to break up with someone.
“Oh, what is it? I actually have something I need to tell you as well,” you replied, trying to keep your worries out of your voice.
“Really?” Ana exclaimed in surprise. This in turn surprised you, you didn’t think you had been doing a good job at keeping your over thinking a secret.
“You can go first,” your girlfriend quickly offered.
Normally you wouldn’t have accepted such an offer, especially not when Ana had been the one to set all this up to talk to you about something. However, something in her tone sounded almost pleading, as if she desperately wanted you to go first. And begging from your girlfriend was something you could never resist.
“Well, I’m guess I’m just going to come out and say it,” you started, taking a deep breath, steeling yourself for whatever might be Ana’s reaction, “I’ve gotten an offer from another club. And I didn’t think it was something I would be interested in, but now that I have it, I realize that I really am. You know how I feel at Real, so this might be my chance to enjoy football again. But then I also don’t want to leave you alone here because I love you and…”
Ana had been listening to you rattling on for a moment, her face unreadable, until she interrupted you sounding oddly excited, “Wait, you’re thinking about leaving Madrid?”
You frowned at her happiness. It was one thing to be excited about something good happening to your partner, but being so happy about them moving away seemed weird to you, and a little painful.
“Wow, no reason to be so happy about getting rid of me,” you mumbled, avoiding your girlfriend’s eyes.
“What? No!” Ana cried out, reaching over to grab your hand. “That’s not what this is about at all. The thing is that I too have gotten offers from other clubs and I didn’t really consider them, but then a few days ago Atleti told me that they wouldn’t renew my contract, so I have no choice but to leave.”
“And I have been feeling so bad about it because just like you said, I didn’t want to leave you behind here either. But if we’re both leaving, it’s a totally different scenario. Sure, long distance is going to suck, but it won’t be forever and at least this way we hopefully both end up in places where we feel happier than at our current clubs.”
Suddenly Ana’s behavior over the last few days made a lot more sense. You had thought she was acting weird because she had picked up on your distress, but really she had been dealing with something herself. Being dropped by yet another team and faced with having to upend her entire life again.
“Ugh, I didn’t think I could hate Atleti more than I already do! How stupid of them to let you go,” you grumbled.
Your girlfriend blinked a couple of times, a smile appearing on her face, “That’s what you’re focusing on right now?”
“Yeah! I’m really annoyed with them! But also…Why didn’t you tell me?”
It wasn’t something you could really complain about since it was very much exactly what you would have done in Ana’s position. Your girlfriend was much better though, when it came to opening up and discussing her struggles. So the fact that she hadn’t told you before didn’t sit right with you.
Ana sighed, rubbing her forehead. “I made up my mind so many times to just come right out and say it, but every time I lost my courage in the last second. Because at it turns out it’s not so easy to tell your girlfriend who you love very much and who has a hard time at work and with her family that you’re moving to another country.”
“Oh.”
You understood that, it was the thing you had been worried about, that Ana felt too much pressure to bring joy to your life because so little else did. Under different circumstances this might have been harder to swallow, but in the current situation it actually helped. It left not a single doubt in your mind, that leaving Madrid was the right choice.
“So, what are your options?” You asked to move on the conversation.
“There are different clubs in Switzerland I could go to, but I don’t really see myself doing that. It would be nice to be close to my family and maybe I should do it to help further women’s football in Switzerland, but it feels more like something I should do, not something I want, you know?”
You knew precisely what she meant. In fact for so long you had made all decisions based on exactly that feeling of ‘I should’, so you were happy Ana didn’t plan on making the same mistake. And you tried to show her that by nodding encouragingly.
“However, the other option is pretty far away, so I just want you to know that no decision has been made yet, and I really want to know what you think. Because if long distance on that scale is a deal breaker for you, I won’t do it,” your girlfriend continued.
Again you nodded, hung up on the fact that you had been having exactly the same thoughts. So as far as distance went this would either work out well for the two of you or Ana would really end up on the other side of the world. What even was on the other side of Mexico? You cursed yourself for your geography knowledge that was clearly lacking.
“Okay, so, the other option is Tigres Femenil. Jenni’s team in Mexico,” your girlfriend rushed out, her eyes flicking between you and the table, as if Ana was torn between wanting to study every miniscule reaction you might show, while also trying to avoid jus tthat.
“What?”
This had to be a joke! Ana probably learnt about your offer from then and decided to play a prank on you. Maybe Jenni had heard about it and told your girlfriend to do this, that would be a Jenni thing to do.
Except not really, though. Your older friend was known for playing pranks and amusing herself at the expense of others, but there was a clear line that she never crossed. And playing with someone’s heart and feelings was on the “don’t”-side of that line.
“I’m sorry! Like I said I haven’t decided yet and if it’s too far then I’ll go to Switzerland. I’m sure that will be great,” Ana apologized frantically. 
“No, wait, that’s not why I reacted like this. The thing is my offer is also from Tigres Femenil, so it just seems a bit unbelievable? People don’t get this lucky in real life,” you explained, disbelief still coloring your tone and set firmly on your face.
“You’re joking right?” Your girlfriend inquired, apparently also having some issues fully accepting this miraculous coincidence as true.
“No, I’m not. They offered me a one year contract with the option for additional years if I like it there and fit well into the team.” Hopefully the added details would make it easier for Ana to believe this was actually happening.
After that the two of you stayed silent for a while, your hearts and minds needed some time to let themselves open up and accept that you were getting much more than you ever hoped for.
You reached that conclusion almost at the same time, huge grins spreading across both of your faces and then there was nothing holding you back anymore. Ana jumped up from her chair first and you swiftly followed suit.
Mere seconds later you basically jumped into your girlfriend’s arms, thinking in the back of your mind that this was exactly how you would celebrate a goal if you would play for the same time. Your heart jumped happily when you realized that you might get a chance to do precisely that next season.
“I’m so happy!” Ana squealed into your ear and you echoed that sentiment.
Moving abroad and playing for another team had sounded excited, but doing so with your girlfriend? That seemed more like a dream than anything else.
Ana and you stayed wrapped up in each other’s arms for a good while, just basking in the happiness. It was a welcome change from the usual reasons you spent so long in each other’s embrace. Normally you did so because one of you, more often than not you, was sad and needed comfort. Now there was not an ounce of sadness present, the air was electrified by excitement and the possibility of everything that was to come.
---
Of course you didn’t decide that night to accept the transfer, not legally at least, but emotionally you definitely did. Still, like the reasonable adults you were, you thought it through, gathered some more information before officially making the choice you had already made the moment you learnt both of you could go to Mexico together.
You called Jenni together to tell her the good news and she was overjoyed. Although if the amount of teasing you had to endure during one measly phone call was anything to go by, you were going to have to put up with a lot next year. You didn’t mind, though. Also you were aware that Ana would put a stop to it if she thought it was getting out of hand. You could as well, Jenni would listen if you seriously told her to stop, but you knew yourself well enough to know that you wouldn’t.
After that Ana and you focused on wrapping up everything in Madrid, sorting out your apartments and such. There was one particular subject you avoided like the plague, your family. You couldn’t leave for Mexico without at least telling them and try one more time, but you also weren’t ready to face them again in the slightest.
Finally you reached a point in time where you could no longer postpone it. Your girlfriend offered multiple times to go with you, but you declined every time, much to Ana’s chagrin. In the end she decided that she would at least drive you and wait for you in a nearby parking lot. You gladly accepted that suggestion.
“And please leave if it gets too much, yeah? Or call me and I will come get you,” Ana reminded you resolutely, still reluctant to let go of your hand.
“Don’t worry, tesoro, I’ll be fine. I don’t think much will come off today, but I just have to try one more time before we leave,” you explained. And it was true; you didn’t have high hopes for your conversation with your family. But even so you ended up being disappointed.
It started with a very frosty greeting, your father leading you into the living room where the rest of your family was sitting. You had chosen that day specifically because you had thought no one else would be over, but apparently you were out of luck. All of your aunts and uncles were assembled, staring at you disapprovingly.
You swallowed roughly, wetting your lips nervously when it became apparent that you would have to lead this conversation. This had been expected, you had even practiced a bit at home with Ana, but now in the moment your mind felt terrifyingly blank. With everyone glaring at you the only thing you could think of was to apologize. And that was the one thing you remembered you didn’t want to do.
“Did you just come here to stare at us?” Your mother questioned unfriendly.  
“No, I…This isn’t so easy. You’re making this really hard for me,” you muttered
“We’re making it hard for you? Do you have any idea what you’ve done to us? Just completely cutting us out of your life because of some random girl you met a few months ago,” your mother accused you.
The guilt and self-doubt threatened to consume you, but you tried to focus on your anger instead. At least the anger would allow you to say what needed to be said, even if you couldn’t lay it out as calmly and clearly as you wanted.
“See, this is what I mean. Everything is always my fault and you never listen to what I have to say,” you defended yourself. “And Ana isn’t just some random girl. I can’t stand that you talk like this about someone I love, someone who I’m pretty sure is the love of my life.”
Your family exchanged meaningful glances, the sentiment on their faces clear as day; they thought you were being ridiculous or childish or dramatic. Three adjectives they loved using to describe you.
“You’re getting too emotional again, niña, that has always been your problem. How do you expect us to take you serious like this? And think about this, you say we’re always acting as if you’re the problem, but in reality it’s you doing that. You always blame everything on us, your horrible family. Poor you with parents, aunts and uncles that support you!”
Condescension was something you were used to, and it had always made you feel very tiny and incredibly mad at the same time. You were an adult for crying out loud, not a little kid. And still in that moment you felt exactly like that.
“Fine, you know what, I can see that this is totally pointless! I don’t even know why I thought I should try again. So I’m just going to tell you the one thing you need to know; once this season is over I’ll go to Mexico to play there. So I guess, see you never?” You yelled, turning around and stomping out of your childhood home, without giving your family any chance to reply. What was the point?
Tears were already streaming down your face as you ran down the street to where Ana was waiting. Your girlfriend saw you coming; she had been keeping an eye out for you practically from the moment you had kissed her goodbye.
When she saw you rushing towards her, Ana’s heart broke. She had hoped this would go better, but your demeanor and the fact that you were back so soon told her everything she needed to know.
Ana quickly clambered out of the car to meet you with open arms. You fell into them, allowing yourself a moment to completely lean into your girlfriend and absorb some strength from her. Not too long though, you didn’t want to risk anyone catching up with you.
“Come on, let’s go,” you requested, already moving to the passenger’s side.
The drive home was mostly silent, your girlfriend held your hand whenever she didn’t need both of them to drive, and only asked you in the very beginning if you were ready to talk. You just shook your head in response. First you would have some more crying to do, before you could even hope to use words.
And you did exactly that, once again safely tucked away in your girlfriend’s arms. You couldn’t wait to get to a point in your life where you didn’t need so much comfort anymore.
“How are you feeling?” Ana prompted once she noticed you were ready to talk. She had seen you biting your cheek, contemplating how to start the conversation and decided to help you out with questions.
“I didn’t have much hope to begin with, but apparently I still had some that could be crushed. And also…,” you stopped, uncertain if you should continue. It felt like you kept bringing up the same things; shouldn’t you get over them at some point?
“Also?”
There was nothing but love and concern on your girlfriend’s face. You didn’t have to worry about her judging you, this was a safe space.
“I’m so annoyed with myself. I couldn’t even say much before I ran away. I can just hear them calling me a dramatic little girl who runs away as soon as things get though”, you gritted out.
Ana tensed at your harsh words towards yourself and she forced herself to count to three before answering, not wanting to sound too intense. There was however nothing she could do about the emotions lingering in her voice.
“Please stop listening to their voices in your head. I don’t think removing yourself from a bad situation is running away, that’s a smart move really. You need to take care of yourself.”
You nodded thoughtfully, “You know I’ve been thinking about that and realized I often put their needs and wants over mine. But I guess putting others first only works if they do the same. Otherwise if I always put them first, but they never put me first, I’m just always going to end up last, right? I think that’s what’s been happening all my life and I’m done with it!”
“Absolutely! If anything your parents should be putting you, their child, first. That’s what my mom said when I talked about it with her. She also said some other things, but I’m not sure if you want to hear them or if it’ll just make you sad.”
Ana studied you carefully, every sign of pain embedded in your body hurting her as well. She hated how that you had to deal with this, so the last thing she wanted to do was to add any pain to it.
“No, please, tell me. I think it will be helpful, hearing what an actual good parent thinks about all of this,” you requested.
You had only met Ana’s parents twice before, but they had been everything you wanted your own family to be. They were excited to see their daughter, but expressed that without making her feel guilty for not being around more. And they had welcomed you with open arms, clearly very pleased that Ana had found a special someone to share her life with.
“She also said that nothing makes her happier than seeing us, her kids, living our best life. Not some life my parents pictured for us, but the life we choose. She can’t really understand why so many people try to force their kids to be something they’re not. According to her slowly getting to meet your children’s truest self is one of the biggest joys of them growing up.”
Your eyes filled with tears again causing your girlfriend distress. You had been sitting opposite each other, hands intertwined in between you, but now Ana pulled you into her embrace again.
“See, I knew I shouldn’t have said anything,” your girlfriend cried out.
You shook your head, “I wanted to hear that, I needed to hear that. It makes me feel less unreasonable and ungrateful.”
Ana gently kissed the top of your head, rubbing comforting circles on your back. “You’re anything but, you’re absolutely amazing.”
The longer you were with your girlfriend and the more she told you things like these, the easier it became to believe them. It wasn’t easy or natural yet, but you found yourself questioning your old beliefs much more often.
You didn’t speak more about it that evening, indulging in some self care instead. However, a few days later you recognized that it was still bothering you. There was no way you would try again, but it also didn’t feel right to shut the door to your family completely.
Surprisingly when you brought it up to Ana, one day after training when you were cuddling on the couch, you practically on top of your girlfriend, she informed you that she had been thinking about that as well.
“How about you set up an email account just for them? This way you can check it every once in a while when you feel up to it, or I can even check it if you prefer. That would allow them to contact you if they have a change of heart, but you aren’t constantly bombarded with unwanted messages.”
A huge weight was lifted from your heart when you heard this suggestion. That was precisely what you wanted, some small gap left open, but nothing that would affect you in your everyday life. The last thing you wanted was to constantly get attacked by hurtful messages.
You placed a few kisses everywhere on your girlfriend’s face, uttering one word between each kiss,”You. Are. The. Best. Girlfriend. In. The. World. And. I. Love. You. So. Much.”
Ana happily accepted your kisses. “So, no second thoughts about moving to Mexico?” She inquired cautiously.
“Not a single one, I’m so excited for it, and I won’t let my family ruin it. Plus it would be the same if I stayed here. If anything being not only in another country, but on another continent might actually be good for me.”
“Good, because I’m very excited about it,” your girlfriend announced with a big smile.
“Me too,” you agreed.
In fact you couldn’t wait to start that adventure with Ana. You had never allowed yourself to be an adventurous person, telling yourself, or really being told by your family, that you were anything but.
However, now you realized that you did have an adventurous streak and it was high time you used it. For too long you had lived the life everyone else wanted you to live, but now you were getting another chance at life, at the life you truly wanted.
You didn't even wait until you moved to Mexico. A few days before leaving, you dragged Ana to a hairdresser, stating that both of you should change up your look to start over fresh.
What you didn't expect though, was for your girlfriend to decide she wanted to color her hair pink. You had thought about something more along the lines of cutting your hair a little shorter.
But then Ana announced with a big grin that she was going pink, and you made a split second decision, telling the hairdresser to whip up some purple hair dye for you.
And that's how the two of your started off your new life, one of you pink haired and the other one purple. You loved the way it looked and couldn't care less when pretty much the first thing out of Jenni's mouth when she picked you up from the airport was, "Where are you two going? A five year old's birthday party?"
"Shut up, Jenni, you're just jealous of us," Ana retorted.
Jenni rolled her eyes, "Maybe, but I get a feeling you're going to help me get over that by annoying me with your lovey-doveyness."
"Absolutely," you agreed, pulling your girlfriend against yourself and kissing her passionately.
"Fine! I'll stop if you stop!" Jenni exclaimed, grabbing one hand from the both of you and marching you towards the exit. "Bienvenida a México, chicas!"
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beloved-blaiddyd · 2 days
Text
LOCKED AND LOADED [Yandere!Wanderer x Reader]
Prompt: The world is about to end. How will you grieve when you're forced to be with a miserable man until the last second? [Dedicated To: @mixed-kester for the Alone Together Event]
Content Tags: yandere!scaramouche "fluff" oneshot (yes, there are no other parts:]), major persona 3 spoilers but you DON’T need to know the game before reading this since everything is explained, improper use of a S.E.E.S evoker /j, Scaramouche is so normal about you, UNRELIABLE NARRATOR, major character death/s–
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V. Acceptance.
"Where the hell are you, (Y/n)?"
Standing near what should have been the front doors of his university was a short man with dark purple hair. He leaned precariously against them, his head tilted upward as if the sickly green moon's ominous pull was nothing to be afraid of. Gekkoukan University's nearby dorms– fraternity and sorority houses included– are not usually this silent. Instead of people, coffins were aligned perpendicular to the ground.
The wanderer glanced at his watch with mild interest. He had been waiting for a while now. Your guest hoisted himself up, circling the ground with the tip of his shoe. The baseline of his attitude had always defaulted to irritability and passive-aggressiveness. The vertically aligned hour-and-minute hands do not placate it. The timing itself makes it worse.
It's December 31st, 2009, 12 AM– the Dark Hour.
With a harsh sneer, he pocketed his hands. You usually have the door to the Velvet Room open to him whenever. What's the big deal? Were you seriously THAT mad at him? Really? He didn't do anything to warrant this "pettiness". He had never known silence as much as this moment.
You should've accounted for the hostility that proceeds on the "off-chance" he did arrive early.
His tone darkened, his bloodied hands gripping his S.E.E.S evoker tightly.
"If you don’t show up, I will cleanse the world of human emotion all by myself"
You shook from afar, afraid of how he wouldn't hesitate to make his threat a reality. He had already taken so much– you were beyond mad at him. You were terrified. Wronged. Abused. You didn't want to step into the light. Much worse, step into his shadow.
The worst thing evil can do is to turn you into one of them.
He clutched the bloodied yellow scarf in his hands tightly.
Why did this happen?
How did things END up like this?
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IV. Depression.
You took a deep breath and charged forward.
You don't trust [Wanderer] ever since Ryoji told him about the impending apocalypse.
Seldom do you leave the Velvet Room. You weren't hiding in the Velvet room months before the end of the world was imminent. When April had only reached its fourth day, there was nothing you wanted more than to spend time outside. So ignominiously innocent. You did not know who [Wanderer] was and how much effect he would have on your life at the time. You were just tired of the ongoing stream of uneventfulness.
And now here you are, berating the protagonist in full.
"[Wanderer], why is Ryoji missing?! US ATTENDANTS CAN'T FIND TRACK HIM ANYWHERE!!!"
With a fistful of his university uniform, you yanked him by the collar. Your eyes were livid as you reeled your composure. This wasn't what you had in mind when you were "isekai"d into a video game. Out of any game, why did it have to be Persona 3? And out of anyone that could be a protagonist, why did it have to be HIM?!
You thought this would be a grand affair... Whatever they spun in anime back when your reality existed were pure lies. Where are the scenic views? The mountains? The grasslands? This plane of existence you're forced to sit through for eternity was far from the RPG fantasy people would hope for. No closer you could ever be to paradise.
In fact, this man is threatening to ruin said paradise.
[Wanderer] pulled your hands away forcefully. His glare was not that different from yours. "Why do you care about him so much?"
"Oh, I don't know! Maybe it's because his death means forgetting everything?!" You clenched your empty fists. "You know damn well what happens if he dies! You'll lose all the help you can get to stopping the Fall!"
Such a heavy weight on your shoulders but the protagonist doesn't care. This may be a turn-based game– but it wasn't based on you. If it was, you wouldn't be screaming your heart out at him! You wouldn't be an NPC. Hell, you'd probably be a better protagonist than him.
You closed your eyes, took a deep breath, and sighed every stress out of your system.
"Listen—" You rubbed your temple. "You need to start forming bonds. Social links. Support system. Confidants. Whatever you want to call it. You were supposed to have the answer by now as to what life is for."
[Wanderer] remained silent throughout your spiels. His facial expression alone was enough to infer immense disinterest. You were mindlessly doing your job. There will be no tirade or physical aggression that can convince him that you believe in your assertions with full conviction.
"Do you want to see him?"
"Yes! Of course. Knowing you, you're—"
"Tempted to kill him because you think I want the world to end?"
"Obviously."
That's where you're wrong.
A nihilistic man can have other reasons to commit murder.
"But if he's missing, you can forget about him, right?"
"What on earth are you talking about?!"
[Wanderer] turned around. "Meet me later, you know the time."
"I'll show you where Ryoji is."
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III. Bargaining.
XX/09/2009
He doesn't recall the time he was brought into this world like you had.
Puppets are malleable. Memories are easy to overwrite when your body is held together by white wood and "khemia". His past evades him.
Maybe it's better this way.
He took you to Chagall Café. Although it was your first time out in a long while, he had no qualms about ignoring your questions. He feigned deafness as you asked about the news, his college life, friends, or anything related to what was happening in 2009. And he even ignored your humble request to buy the cheapest coffee for you. Instead, he bought you a chocolate frappe.
"For Elizabeth's cutest little sibling." He said, sarcastically copying Elizabeth's tone as he sharply handed the drink. "Wouldn't want everyone's darling to get a caffeine addiction."
Thanks, asshat.
Of all his offensive behavior— he really spent more money just to insult you. You shook your head and accepted it. It's the most expensive one on the menu too. What dedication to being a hater. But before you could open your wallet, he shot your payment down.
"Just take it." He smirked. "Look at you, paying me back for treating you poorly. Are you a masochist?"
You immediately shoved your money back in. "You still bought me a free drink, so really, who's the loser here? Prick."
[Wanderer] laughed heartily before he pulled out his battered codal, which had underlined texts for provisions he deemed important. There was a momentary softness in his gaze that disappeared in an instant.
But that's the only conversation he planned on having that evening. He did mention he'll drag you out in his study session so you weren't too shocked by it. Instead, you sat and awkwardly people-watched. The world you came from and this one were identical. You got through your old 2009 just fine— it's just that Tatsumi Port Island was not a real location from your original Japan.
Your memories about the video game Persona aren't very clear since you reincarnated in the game, but the red band [Wanderer] wore on his sleeve affirmed that he is the leader of S.E.E.S. It's nice to know that someone like him has the potential to become a leader.
[Wanderer] appeared wholly immersed in his studies.
Maybe he wouldn't notice if you looked around—
…?!
He immediately grabbed your hand. You yelped slightly as you noticed the iron grip he had.
"Where are you going?"
Don't leave him.
He squeezed just a bit more tightly.
"W-What the— I'm just going to the bathroom." You felt a shiver down your spine as you shared his gaze. There's a dull coldness to it you couldn't quite place, as if he had been a witness to injustice, sevenfold.
You quietly sat back down. He still hasn't let go of your hand.
"Good riddance." He muttered.
"If it isn't [Wanderer]!"
You turned around, yanking your hand away.
It's Ryoji.
You stood up, gawking.
"W-Woah, are you okay?" Ryoji asked, hurriedly approaching you. While you were frozen in place, [Wanderer] looked at his empty hand, feeling your warmth escape his fingertips.
G-Good… he's still alive.
You thought [Wanderer] killed him.
[Wanderer] is the wildcard, and that's a terrifying factor to consider. He hasn't shown any interest in humanity. Knowing his past has not increased any hope on your end. Everyone else in his eyes are insignificant insects.
He has the power to end Ryoji.
He has the power to end this world.
Locked and loaded.
Ryoji's eyes softened. "Wait, I think I know a beautiful face like yours from somewhere… You must be [Wanderer]'s attendant, (Y/n), right?"
You blinked.
"Wait, how did you…"
He chuckled, taking and placing a soft kiss on your gloved hands.
"I have my ways." Ryoji winked.
"Don't touch them." [Wanderer] sneered.
Ryoji stood up straight, unfazed by his threatening tone. You took a moment to examine his appearance. He had a lot of white clothing and a big yellow scarf around his neck. Just below his left eye is a mole. On the surface, he appeared quite human, but everyone seated at this table was aware of his true nature.
He is the 13th arcana. The appraiser.
You and [Wanderer] have every right to be wary.
"I'm Ryoji Mochizuki. It's nice to be officially introduced to you, Mx. (Y/n)."
"Ryoji Mochizuki…" You tasted the syllables.
"Oh? Who knew hearing my name from your lips makes it sound so wonderful."
"C-Cut it out, you don't mean that." You said, a little flustered.
[Wanderer]'s gaze fixated on you, stewing in his concoction of envy and misery. His fists were clenched beneath the table, knuckles turning white. With narrowed eyes, he watched as you continued engaging in conversation with Ryoji. His laughter was grating his ears. He couldn't bear the sight of you engaging with another man, especially someone as flirtatious as him.
Ryoji, sensing [Wanderer]'s distress, shot him a casual glance. To top the look, he paired it with a knowing smirk. He made mental notes of the man's clenched jaw and tensed shoulders.
"You seem a little on edge, [Wanderer]. Finals coming up?" He feigned innocence.
"It's December, and I'm not on edge." He scoffed, trying not to make his gritted teeth evident. "Don't you own a calendar? Finals are in March. To think a pea-brain like you managed to transfer to Gekkan…"
"Right, right." Ryoji smiled, closing his eyes. "Then it must be my proposal you're thinking of."
You stiffened; [Wanderer] did not.
"Ryoji—"
"I know, Mx. (Y/n)." He started. "I know you're not too keen on the idea of killing me. My existence is the affirmation of the Fall. None of you— sorry, I forgot (Y/n) is from the Velvet room— I meant none of them will live till Spring… Or perhaps it's more accurate to say they'll forfeit the will to live."
"… I-I'm sorry." Ryoji buried his face in his yellow scarf. There's a certain tremble in his voice that truly emphasizes his sorrow. "Just as all living things die, the flow of time cannot be hindered. But there's comfort in killing me. If you do… you won't have to suffer for the coming days."
If [Wanderer] kills Ryoji, Tartarus, the Dark Hour— the burden of everyone's memories will all disappear.
But [Wanderer] can retain his.
He's not originally from this world after all…
However, should he let him live, the rest of S.E.E.S's life will continue until everyone's inevitable demise.
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever."
[Wanderer] rolled his eyes, diverting his eyes back to his notes. "Everyone will die soon, who cares? I've heard your spiel several times already. You need to get more entertaining material."
"[Wanderer]!" You scolded him.
Your eyes widened in disbelief at [Wanderer]'s unwittingly casual jabs at the apocalypse. You wanted to ask him if he was even listening, but the truth will disappoint you. A cold sweat formed on your brow.
Ryoji's smile crooked into a hopeless one.
"You depend on (Y/n) too much."
[Wanderer] froze. "What did you say…?"
"You have a group of people around you, eager to establish a bond— eager to be friends with you. You have met Junpei, Yukari, Mitsuru, Akihiko, Fuuka, and many others– but you don't consider any of them as your friends." Ryoji shook his head. "Instead, you spend your time with just (Y/n). Never anyone else. Just them. To the point that I think it's unhealthy."
"I don't care for humans." He replied immediately.
"You're human too, [Wanderer]." Ryoji shot back. "You're made of blood, bones, and flesh."
[Wanderer] fell silent. What Ryoji said was true, and yet…
"Am I?" He laughed.
The sound was hollow and mechanical. Deprived of genuine mirth. It did not sound forced, yet his eyes were dull.
Perhaps he lived as a puppet for so long that the idea of being human has yet to reach him.
Ryoji shifted, uncomfortably glancing between you two. The tension was palpable despite the cafe's peaceful ambiance. Ryoji cleared his throat softly.
"I should leave…" He trailed off, voice slightly wavering. His eyes darted around, scrambling for words to say. "But, um, before I leave, I just want to say again that you need to give it some more thought, [Wanderer]... It's a big deal… Just…"
Ryoji sighed. "Remember to make your choice to spare or kill me by December 31st. I'm glad you're having fun but don't get too distracted with (Y/n). I'll be waiting."
That being said, his footsteps reverberated loudly in the otherwise still room as he turned and headed for the door. He dared to turn back as he grabbed for the doorknob and saw you two sharing a look that he couldn't determine if it was one of contemplation or displeasure. He hurried out and the cafe door shut behind him.
"Happy?" [Wanderer] bitterly asked.
You paused for a moment… then grinned.
"Tsk, what are you laughing at, worm?"
"Nothing, nothing!" You shrugged. "I just thought that for a guy with a stick up his ass, you're cute when you're jealous."
That riled [Wanderer] up in an instant.
You do not know the full extent of his envy's filth.
"I am NOT—" He stopped, realizing how counterproductive it would be. "Whatever. I don't care."
"Uhuh?"
"Shut up and finish your damn chocolate!"
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II. Anger.
Before you know it, it's April.
"Seriously, you three, I'm bored as fuck! Can't I just take a stroll outside?" You yelled, waving the heavy persona compendium in the air as your sisters ignored you.
It hasn't been long since you reincarnated, so your right to go outside isn't as liberal. Given the impending threat of an apocalypse, the Velvet Room attendants are especially overprotective.
"(Y/n), dear sibling, watch your mouth! You mustn't let Igor or Nameless hear you speak so vulgarly."
Taking a good look at your new "siblings", you've noticed how almost everyone was present. Margaret sat elegantly on the sofa while Theodore & Elizabeth were doing their best to calm you down. It's almost rare to have all three in one place. The three oldest were busy-bodies who had more eccentric matters they devoted their attention to. Including rapping and dancing, though neither performances are good for your senses.
"If boredom plagues you, then you should try teasing Theodore." Elizabeth yawned. "He's easy pickings."
"Sister!" Theodore pouted. "Shouldn't (Y/n) focus on studying how fusing works? It would be a better use of their time…"
"The day (Y/n)'s new wildcard learns the value of social links might just be the day miserly politicians become generous." Elizabeth shrugged.
You paled, tugging her sleeve. "Oh fuck… Am I screwed?"
She gave you a lopsided smile. "I may be your new sibling but that does not mean I am obliged to resolve your problems, (Y/n). Learn to solve this on your own."
Theodore coughed.
"Please, stop scaring them, sister Elizabeth. It's not their fault this new guest is a cruel arbiter. I fear there will not be a second of groundless joy in store for them…"
"You're not helping me relax either! Motherfucker. Can't you two speak normally?"
"Settle down, all of you."
The four of you stood straight as Igor tilted his chin up. Though you've gotten used to his bloodshot gaze, it had a way of prickling your skin this time around. With his signature smile, he closed his eyes and snapped his fingers.
"Our guest is about to enter."
"W-Wait, RIGHT NOW?!?"
Before you could react, the room transformed into what appeared to be a large elevator. The walls were barred and creaking noises began to subtly make their presence. A floating door materialized, and soon, opened.
Dark purple hair and eyes, short frame, soft face.
"…Hmm?"
You blinked.
"Wait, no way…"
You know him.
Of course, you know him.
"Everyone, meet [Wanderer]."
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You decided that you two should reintroduce yourselves and forget that the past ever happened.
For now, you had been gifted with a vital role: being the protagonist's attendant.
According to your Igor, your role is to assist your guest in fusing personas. He had chosen you specifically in advance as you are his "anima/animus figure". Initially, that job was for Elizabeth. However, your beliefs, your intuition, your emotions— they're in perfect tune with [Wanderer]. Igor expects you to facilitate their spiritual and psychological growth and implore them to interact more with others.
Which, based on that alone, sounds like this puppet just hired an unpaid therapist.
"What do you want?"
"Well…"
Since you became [Wanderer]'s attendant, you've started to have thicker skin. He will always make his crankiness known each visit. You're slightly grateful for it, for how else would you know patience otherwise? Though his personality rubs you the wrong way, his strength does have merits you cannot ignore. Even Belladona, the Velvet Room's devout singer, had sung praises for his mettle. There was one line that struck you about her song, something about him being like a puppet with a beating heart unbeknownst to himself…
Which is why you thought you might as well try to see if you could convince him to take you out sometimes.
"What, like a date?" [Wanderer] scoffed then smirked, a light blush on his face. "Are you really that desperate?"
"No, eww—" You rolled your eyes. "I meant it literally. Igor and the others wouldn't let me go outside unless I'm with someone they trust."
He looked away and covered his mouth, his shoulders trembling slightly.
"Like a child?"
"Yeah, yeah, shut the fuck up." You deadpanned, your pride slightly chipped. "Like a child or whatever you want to see it, as long as it gets me out of here. I just want to see the world before it all…"
You paused.
Better not to bring it up. You're not sure if Igor told him yet.
[Wanderer] raised an eyebrow. "What's in it for me?"
You shrugged. "Is money not enough?"
He paused.
"You've got to be kidding me— Fine, what else do you want?"
His eyelids lowered, hissing slightly. "Evil expects evil from others, huh? I wasn't trying to think of anything more, but now that I think about it…"
"Oh, great."
"… I can take your request," he pointed at you. "But only if you join me in the library. Anywhere else, especially loud places like clubs, I'll send your ass back."
That's a no-brainer.
"Deal!"
Though you've missed the peculiar sight, [Wanderer] had a small smile on his face as you shook hands. The two of you had become nearly inseparable since then.
Worryingly, he's closer to you than other humans.
The only relationship he needed was with you.
And with what little time this world has left, you hope you could have a last cup of coffee with him…
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I. Denial.
Your reality crumbled. What a START.
Your family, friends... all gone. No one was left. You convince yourself you "deserved" this punishment for smoking a life away with dreadful workloads, no matter how untrue it was. When the world burnt down, you were sent into a darkness you had not known before.
The person in charge of your reincarnation process told you that for the next few minutes, you and a selected companion will see your lives flash before your eyes in a void— and it will not necessarily be a comforting sight.
But you woke up relaxed. In an abyss filled with broken mirrors meant to depict your character to pieces, you donned a plain expression. There was not an inch of you that grieved for what was lost. Similarly, you had no care for how you were being transmigrated to another realm. Though you had grown accustomed to this isolation, humanity always struggled with silence. There was ringing on your fingers. When you unclasped your hands, you saw a pointed shard. Curiously, you clenched it. But no matter the tightness of your grip, no blood came out.
Your breath fogged up the glass. You wondered why that Memokeeper told you that you deserve to live on. You thought your life was rather unremarkable.
Makes sense. You thought to yourself. I'd rather pride myself on a boring life with integrity than an ambitious yet fraudulent one.
「Assignments. Commute. Study. Review. Assignments. Commute. Study. Review. Was that all your life was...? Then tell me, little (Y/n), why does the mirror in front of you appear distorted?」
And so, you gazed forward. Your reflection stood tall, larger than your life, and it beckoned you to come closer. This "(Y/n) (L/n)" had the opposite of a Cheshire grin- perhaps a caricature- perhaps an accurate depiction. Wearied of yourself and wearied of the sycophantic students around you. How unhappy are you to see yourself as someone like this? Are these the emotions you wish to be preserved? Is this the memory you want your world to be remembered by?
「These memories must be corrupted. Someone must be tampering with them. I do not think you lived a miserable life.」
I can't answer your questions either. But I think that reflection is who I am, because sometimes...
"I wish I had never been born at all."
Your lips were parted, but no sound came out. You resonated with those words, but they did not come from you. The voice was dark, hopeless, and alone.
When you were being sent off, you thought no one was around to greet you. There was another man. He had short hair and purple eyes- an incredibly rare sight in your world. This man seemed to be gazing at his reflection as well. You needn't know how he saw himself. The emptiness in his eyes did not differ from yours. He, too, was masking isolation as independence with an intense fragility. The dread he inflicted upon you was the closest you've ever gotten to facing your own perceived "weakness".
His memories were a mixbag. Some were filled with domestic bliss, but the anger in his heart triumphed more. He had friends but thought himself betrayed. His heart was constructed through a system of evasions, and he was a specialist in self-deception. This man knew little of emotions but had an abundance of it. It's no wonder he refused to sacrifice the artistry of his vengeance against humanity. You can sympathize with how he could not attach himself to those around him. He was burdened with malicious knowledge. Fakes. Lies. Insincerities. A class of his own.
However, he had a sin you cannot empathize with. A trait you can read that you're certain he had never noticed about himself.
He was a sickeningly beautiful man with a peculiar innocence.
He looked like a man who truly did not live in the real world.
This man did not feel real to you. He felt made-up. Fictional. His aura of flawlessness appalled you. Though you shared the same sentiments, you thought him dimensionless.
Yet this is supposedly your first meeting.
「Is it? Where have you seen him before? Can't you remember, dear (Y/n)?」
No. No, I can't.
「... What a shame. Worry no more, little (Y/n). Close your eyes. When you wake up, you will meet your new reality— new realm— new family.」
You nodded and agreed to a higher existence you did not believe in. Unlike others, you were a little bit more incapable of trusting a living soul. But there's no other choice.
Life is ordinarily far from anyone's control in the first place. Why bother fighting? If following can make her fuck off, it doesn't matter.
Nothing matters.
Wait…
Is that…
Scaramouche?
Before you closed your eyes and accepted your fate, you could've sworn...
He looked at you with a crooked grin.
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「Thou art I... And I am thou...
Thou hast established a new bond...
Thou shalt be blessed when creating
Personas of the Universe Arcana..."」
"Hmm. Strange… Is that truly the order of the story?"
A woman stared at you.
Not (Y/n) (L/n).
YOU.
BEHIND.
THE.
SCREEN.
She smiled wryly.
Hate might empower you for a short while, but it comes at the cost of consuming you whole. Should a shard or any surface reflect [Wanderer]'s face, he would understand what he had become. However, it's too late. He had made his choice and stomped away any remorse he could have. When all is said and done, he alone will spread the ashes. He alone will stand. A blank slate.
[Wanderer] spent his life looking for scapegoats and ended up removing his responsibility.
Betrayals?
What a sad, sad puppet.
What a poor excuse to justify an entire apocalypse.
A poor excuse of a man.
"THE ARCANA IS THE MEANS BY WHICH ALL IS REVEALED." She muttered softly. "And you have been reading your story in REVERSE. Perhaps this is the only way this world can attain SALVATION. The chronological order is not a slice of life. You did not have a disagreement and decided to start your relationship over again. Life is far more WICKED."
"Read it again, but from DENIAL to ACCEPTANCE. The proper way to GRIEVE DEATH."
With great reluctance, she took the five cards laid on the table and placed them in an upright position.
"Let's see if you'd rather ACCEPT the truth or live in DENIAL."
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Mixed-Kester can now message Wanderer [prior to 12/31/2009]
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letmereadinpeace4 · 2 days
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Love Sea episode 1 Commentary
So yesterday the first episode of Love Sea was released. After watching it, I decided to put down my thoughts and impressions. Hopefully I can keep it up until the end of the drama.
First, a few things:
I have bought and read the Love Sea novel. I will try my best not to spoil anything, but this knowledge informs my perception and my commentary. I have also read Love Sand, which chronologically happens before Love Sea, and I will spoil minor plot points if I think they can help understand elements in the drama.
There will be no Mame hate in this post, or in any other posts.
With that out of the way, let’s start:
The drama opens by separately introducing the main characters. Masahamut is diving, checking and noting damages, while Tongrak is on his way to the island, wearing the most impractical travel outfit he could have possibly worn. We learn that his stay on the island was booked by Connor Warrington, a close friend of his.
The character introduction is pretty well done. Masahamut is set up as a character who deeply cares about the well-being of the island he lives on. He is shown interacting with his friend Palm (they are not biologically related, they are senior/junior) and we get an impression of someone who communicates well with others and has a joking, playful side to him. Meanwhile, Tongrak is shown alone, even as he talks with Connor, we do not hear his replies, so we get the sense of someone cut off from other people. His outfit is also very fancy, showing his financial comfort, but also wildly impractical, showing that he is not very down to earth.
To explain who the characters are in the Mame universe, Masahamut is the best friend of Khom, who is Type’s childhood friend (from Tharntype). Khom is dating Connor, who is close friend with Tongrak. Tongrak is also a novelist, and his novels have been adapted by the movie director Aphros, who is Prapai’s uncle and the director who inspired Sky after his breakdown (not going to lie, with all those connections, I am low-key surprised that the closest we ever got to incest was Tum and Tar’s relationship).
At the docks, Tongrak is not exactly impressed with the place he will be staying at. We have it confirmed that Connor booked his stay because Tongrak’s next novel will be about the ocean (Connor my beloved I love you so much you asshole). Masahamut meets Tongrak at the docks and decide to piss him off by speaking in a Southern accent and not driving an appropriate vehicle to transport his suitcases. After Tongrak blows a fuse, Masahamut cuts him off and borrows a cargo tricycle.
This develops the characters a bit further. Tongrak shows a rather childish side and a lack of control over his emotions, while Masahamut’s confidence and capacity to adapt is set up. We also see more of his playful, “troll” side. I also like how his popularity on the island is subtly shown by having him borrow a bike from someone with no issue whatsoever. People trust him!
Tongrak immediately calls Connor to complain and demands to go home, further showing his childish, needy side. We get to hear Connor, who is mostly amused. Meanwhile, Masahamut unloads Tongrak’s suitcases with an amused expression and grabs the phone to chat up with Connor.
For more explanation about Connor and Masahamut’s relationship, they met when Connor stayed at the island for the holiday. He met Khom, who was working as Masahamut’s assistant and as Connor’s guide, and Masahamut helped Connor in his pursuit of Khom (in exchange for monetary compensation. Truly a win/win situation for everyone involved).
I love how entertained Masahamut is with Tongrak’s prissiness. He doesn’t care or take it personally, just rolls with it and takes advantage of it to troll him.
Masahamut escorts Tongrak to his room, who immediately pushes him out and ignore his offer to be at his disposal if he needs anything.
Sidenote, but I love Tongrak raging against the suitcase and later at the blankets. It is so cute, childish and relatable at the same time. I have definitely “scolded” a zipper because it wouldn’t open or the printer because it had issues.
We cut to Mook, Tongrak’s assistant/secretary, who is looking very busy and overworked. She is so far the most relatable character in the drama for me, down with the messy hair. She is called by Vi, Tongrak’s best friend, who promises to keep her busy. I love her, she is such a troll! Also a cameo appearance by Ja, which is definitely great to see! Hope he’s been well!
We cut back to Tongrak as he goes to a bar, wearing a really awesome sheer shirt and enjoying the attention he gets. Palm is his waiter, and immediately start hyping up Masahamut. We get confirmation that Masahamut is really popular both with the residents and with the tourists. We also learn that he is bi, which is great! We always love to see bi representation.
Tongrak seems pissed both at the fact that Masahamut is popular and by the fact that people would assume he is attracted to him, which he is definitely not! One hundred percent not! Not a trace of attraction here! Who cares if Masahamut is handsome anyway? Not him that’s who! And his sulking has nothing to do with it.
Next morning, we get to see how much Masahamut is involved in his community. While it may seem a bit heavy-handed, I do like that this aspect of Masahamut is so strongly enforced. It gives him a lot more depth and shows his maturity.
This mature impression is immediately countered when we see that he has a double of Tongrak’s keys and didn’t tell him. He immediately takes on the caretaker role and as he cleans up the room, we learn that Connor paid Masahamut to serve as Tongrak’s caretaker/nanny/guide/sitter during his time on the island. Is it like some kind of gift reciprocity? Masahamut helped Connor date his best friend so Connor helps Masahamut get with his own friend? I also really like the comparison of Tongrak to a cat. It suits him so well. We also have it mentioned again that Tongrak is very lonely (initially, Connor filled that loneliness void, but once he started dating Khom, he could no longer give as much attention to Rak as he used to, hence why he is trying to find a solution.)
Connor wakes Tongrak up. Not going to lie I would punch him! Do not bother me before I had my tea and breakfast! As he tries to punch him Tongrak falls on the ground, giving Masahamut a perfect view of his body.
The “seduction” scene is really well-done. You can see the switch as Tongrak finds himself in a more familiar territory and tries to seduce Masahamut by removing his robe/shirt. He really seems to enjoy having power over Masahamut, especially since the latter has annoyed him so much. However while Masahamut is admirative, he does not lose his head and starts commenting on Tongrak’s lack of body hair. You can really see the switch back as Tongrak loses his confidence. Peat acted really well in that scene!
I love how offended Tongrak is by Masahamut’s lack of sexual interest. Poor kitty got his pride hurt! Speaking of which I also love how Masahamut speaks of Tongrak like a kitty he is taking care of.
Tongrak tries to provoke Masahamut by constantly asking for a different breakfast and being picky, to no success. I always enjoy seeing Tongrak’s bratty side, especially when his brattiness doesn’t work.
Masahamut is such a troll! I love him already!
Meanwhile, Tongrak has found out a way to get Masahamut to do what he wants (to some extent). He pays him to get him to speak in a Central dialect. It really sets well the economic difference between them. Tongrak has money to burn and Masahamut will do anything for money. I love how much he doesn’t care about being bought and getting money from his clients. Masahamut is there singing “Material Girl” and doesn’t care about what anyone thinks!
I love it any time Tongrak’s more vain side is shown. The way he jumps when Masahamut mentions wrinkles. Also he is supposed to be in his late twenties/early thirties.
Masahamut offers his sexual services and can obviously see that Tongrak is more interested than he lets on. “Even if you were the last man on Earth, I still wouldn’t want you”. Oh hey! I heard a cool girl named Elizabeth Bennet say the exact same thing. I wonder what happened to her….
We cut back to Mook rehearsing her speech to Vi to not have to work as her assistant. By the way I love her shirt! As she dares Vi to call her, she answers her prayers and does so! We get to see that Mook has an itemized list of how to deal with Vi! That is some thoroughness! Anyway Vi claims a light bulb in her room is busted and that Mook needs to come and change it. I see Vi subscribes to the “pulling her hair” strategy in courtship. Meanwhile Mook is getting more and more erratic and her faces are amazing! She looks offended, outraged and confused at the same time. Also I love how messy her hair is.
“I’m a frail lead actress who can’t do anything on her own” as she sits on the ladder she used to bust her own light bub to get her crush to come to her place! I love Vi she’s such a troll! Also does she have Mook’s picture? I can’t really see well.
In his room, Tongrak is having trouble writing the sex scene and we learn he needs to have sex or to hug someone to properly write sex scenes. It really is interesting that Tongrak needs an intense physical situation to describe a romantic sex scene, because it suggests that he cannot conceptualize the intensity of the emotions involved unless he experiences a “similar”, physical sensation. It really goes with him being lonely but also suggests he never truly offered his heart to anyone.
The next day, Tongrak is working on his novel, looking extremely cute with his round glasses, while Masahamut is waiting. He soon gets bored and starts reading what Tongrak is writing. I wonder if the sex scene he reads out is a random scene that was written especially for this or if it was taken from another of Mame’s novels. I cannot place it.
Anyway Masahamut is bored of it and takes Tongrak on a boat to show him around. I love how Masahamut gently scolds Tongrak and tells him to sit properly so that he doesn’t fall, causing Tongrak to sulk. It sets up their future dynamic. Also Masahamut don’t scold the kitty! He’s a city kitty and has never been on the sea before.
Tongrak is called by Mook and doesn’t hear her well. Yeah in the middle of the sea it is a lost cause. Masahamut decides to take a dive while Tongrak is on the phone, causing him to panic. I actually agree with Tongrak here! For safety reasons Masahamut should have warned him.
Tongrak freaks out and starts crying. Masahamut tries to reassure him by poiting out that he’s fine but is unsuccessful. I love how he takes the freak out seriously and only reaches to touch him after Tongrak has been unresponsive. Tongrak scolds him and Masahamut reaches out to hug him and apologize. I love the light little kiss on the forehead and how Tongrak slowly accepts Masahamut’s hug.
Afterwards, Tongrak is embarrassed about his crying episode (don’t worry baby it happens to the best of us) and plays the shy Victorian maiden when Masahamut moves to remove his shirt as if he didn’t wear a sheer shirt in public two days before. Masahamut offers to show him the good stuff, and just like Tongrak I was not thinking of clams when he said that! Again, I love how confident Masahamut is! He is aware of his charm and sees well the effect he has on Tongrak. The episode ends with them still on the roof of the boat.
Overall I really enjoyed this episode. It was a good set up for the characters and I love the atmosphere they created. I look forward to seeing more of it.
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yk the thalia fics you made ages ago?? could you do platonic headcanons for the relationship with thalia and the reader in that fic? like someone who ran away and found thalia, luke and annabeth. the reader being a child of hades or poseidon idm!!
⋆⭒˚.⋆ platonic! thalia grace x daughter of poseidon! reader hcs
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𝜗𝜚 content…platonic! thalia grace x daughter of poseidon! reader hcs 𝜗𝜚 warning…language, slightly angsty near the end 𝜗𝜚 letters from the author…this was so silly goofy until the end bc i got SAD okay i APOLGOIZE YALL- it's minor angst trust (im a liar it is GUT WRENCHING) yall will be fine (i am not fine) don't worry (worry, i fear) it's actually not bad, im legit just hyping it up bc the silly vibes came back lmao- ALSO you can find the series anon is talked about HERE
────────── ౨ৎ ──────────
༄.° billie eilish wrote birds of a feather about them (not clickbate)
༄.° just two big sisters fighting to be the big sister to the other girl lmao
༄.° so so close, there is not a single secret between these girls
༄.° the lore between them runs deep, i fear
༄.° "do you remember that one time-"
༄.° "of course i do!"
༄.° black cat and orange cat coded like no other
༄.° also one of the few things that gave thalia pause about becoming a huntress was that she'd never get to grow old with you like you guys talked about after running away
༄.° you, of course, comforted her over this and told it would be okay
༄.° oh and moTHERFUCK THE BIG THREE IT'S JUST THESE TWO FRFR
༄.° scary when they fight together
༄.° even worse when they fight each other
༄.° it rarely happens and is over petty shit but like natural catastrophes are happening all over the planet bc of them
༄.° "can you just give thalia her shirt back? i think england hasn't seen the sun in a week."
༄.° "fuck the british and fuck her shirt, which she gave to me!"
༄.° "I DID NOT!"
༄.° "YOU DID TOO!"
༄.° "girls! you could wipe out a nation with your emotions, calm down."
༄.° they fight like siblings, which means they also love like siblings
༄.° like, yeah, yall could be screaming at each other one second but by the next your crying in each others arms bc you guys thought about the fact that one day your family won't be thalia and annabeth but rather your husband and kids
༄.° on that note, i'd like to introduce the president and vice president of the 'annabeth chase protection' club
༄.° both sat percy down for a very intense (and totally not threatening) talk about how if he so much as mistreats annabeth for a second they will make him disappear with a trace
༄.° bro left that convo shaking lmao-
༄.° you two have sweet (and sour) nicknames for each other
༄.° you like to call thalia 'birdie' when she's nice and 'thunder pants' when she's not so nice lmao
༄.° she likes to call you 'beach bum' when you don't piss her off and when you do she calls you 'conch cunt'
༄.° both are feral children, your honor
༄.° that's what living in the woods at a young age does to people idk what to tell ya
༄.° if these two see a tree, TRUST, they will be climbing it
༄.° tho, only a few branches bc they are both scared of height lmao
༄.° there is no love like a girlhood love and lemme tell ya, these girls got it alright
༄.° and one day, thalia will be without her favorite beach bum, her bird of a feather, forever sixteen whilst the other grew old and withered
༄.° one destined to stay the same forever while the other is destined to change until the end
༄.° this is a very old story, written in stones and stars
༄.° there is no changing it, i fear
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bioethicists · 2 days
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are you a multiple? Do you have any thoughts on multiples in an anti-psych context?
i wouldn't identify myself as a multiple but i have a lot of internal experiences in common with multiples; it's just not a framework i've found particularly important to explore since my fragmentation is mostly 2 parts in a relatively run-of-the-mill post-childhood-abuse manifestation (intellectualizing protector vs emotional wreck, iykyk).
the main thing i would say is that if you claim to hold anti-psych beliefs, concepts like "syscourse" should be placed in context of questions like "do i believe that experiences must be validated by psychiatrists in order to exist?" "do i value or trust the dsm?" "do i derive my claims to legitimacy + respect from clinical validation?" "what is the history of these terms/ideas about my life + how do i feel about those ideas?"
psych abolition ideas may be rising in popularity among 2017 tumblr mental illness bloggers but many of them are not reexamining core assumptions (e.g reifying diagnostic categories, walling off terms behind diagnoses, demanding ppl disclose their trauma histories, drawing distinct/uncrossable lines between "neurotypicals" + "others")
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estellan0vella · 11 hours
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Betrayed Affections ❀ Uraume (REQUESTED) Masterlist Pt 1
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The moon hangs heavy in the night sky, its pale light filtering through the tall windows of the ancient estate. You wander the silent halls, your footsteps barely making a sound on the polished stone floors.
The air is cool, carrying the faint scent of jasmine from the gardens outside. Your thoughts are a whirlwind, your heart a fragile thing, broken and aching in your chest.
Uraume. The name echoes in your mind like a bitter mantra, each repetition a fresh stab of pain. Your lover, your confidant, your trusted companion. You had believed in them, had given them your heart without reservation. And they had taken it, only to shatter it with their betrayal.
You had stumbled upon them in the midst of their treachery, their lips pressed against those of a servant girl, their hands caressing her with the same tenderness they once reserved for you.
The sight had stolen your breath, leaving you frozen in place, disbelief and heartbreak warring within you. When they had finally noticed you, their eyes wide with shock, it had been too late. The damage was done.
Now, with nowhere else to turn, you find yourself standing before the grand doors of your brother's chamber. Ryomen Sukuna, the King of Curses, feared and revered in equal measure. He is your elder brother, your protector, the one constant in your life. Taking a deep breath, you push the doors open and step inside.
The room is dimly lit, the flickering flames of candles casting long shadows on the walls. Sukuna lounges on a throne-like chair, his imposing figure relaxed yet exuding an aura of power. His four eyes, sharp and discerning, flicker up to meet yours as you enter. He takes in your tear-streaked face, the anguish in your eyes, and his expression softens slightly, a rare sight for anyone else but you.
"Brother," you manage to whisper, your voice trembling. "I... I need you."
He rises from his chair, his movements fluid and graceful. As he approaches, you can feel the familiar warmth of his presence, a stark contrast to the cold emptiness that has settled in your heart. Without a word, he wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a comforting embrace. For a moment, you allow yourself to melt into his strength, the tears flowing freely.
"What happened?" he asks, his voice a low rumble.
You pull back slightly, just enough to look up at him. "Uraume... they betrayed me. With a servant girl."
For a moment, there's silence as Sukuna's face hardens in anger and there's a trace of pain in his eyes as if he feels the agony in your heart. "They dare to hurt you?" he growls, his voice low and dangerous. "You will not suffer alone, sister."
He holds you until your sobs subside, his presence a solid anchor in your storm of emotions. Despite his fearsome reputation, Sukuna's touch is gentle, his embrace a haven of safety you desperately need. His fingers brush through your hair, and he lets you cry until there's nothing left but a hollow ache in your chest.
"I will make them pay," he promises, his voice soft but laced with steel. "But first, you need to confront them. Show them the strength they underestimated."
"Not today," You murmur. "I fear if I do it today, I shall only cry"
Sukuna nods understandingly, his grip on you loosening just enough to allow you some space. "That is fine, sister," he says, his voice a soothing balm to your wounded soul. "You don't have to confront them until you're ready. Take all the time you need."
You offer him a weak smile, grateful for his unwavering support. "Thank you, Sukuna," you say softly, the words barely above a whisper. "I don't know what I would do without you."
He returns your smile, his four eyes gleaming with warmth. "You will never have to find out," he assures you, his tone filled with conviction. "I will always be here for you, no matter what."
You lean into his embrace once more, drawing strength from his presence. For a while, you simply stand there in silence, the weight of your heartbreak easing ever so slightly in his company.
Eventually, Sukuna pulls back, his hands resting gently on your shoulders as he meets your gaze. "Is there anything else I can do for you, sister?" he asks, his voice gentle yet firm.
You shake your head, a small sigh escaping your lips. "Just... stay with me a little longer," you request, a hint of vulnerability creeping into your voice.
Sukuna nods, a soft smile gracing his lips. "Of course," he says, his tone reassuring. "I'll stay with you as long as you need me."
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When you finally confront Uraume, they are with the servant girl again, their laughter cutting through you like a knife. The room falls silent as you enter, your heart pounding in your chest. Uraume's eyes widen with shock and something else—guilt, perhaps?—as they see you and Sukuna standing together.
"How could you?" you whisper, your voice trembling but determined. "How could you betray me like this?"
Uraume steps forward, reaching out to you, but Sukuna's growl stops them in their tracks. "Don't you dare touch her," he snarls. "You've done enough damage."
Tears well up in your eyes again, but you blink them away, refusing to let Uraume see you break. "I loved you," you say, your voice steadier now. "I trusted you. And this is how you repay me?"
"I... I'm sorry," Uraume stammers, their eyes flicking nervously to Sukuna, whose gaze is fixed on them with murderous intensity. "It was a mistake, a moment of weakness—"
"A mistake?" you echo, incredulous. "A moment of weakness that has been going on behind my back? How long, Uraume? How long have you been betraying me?"
They look down, unable to meet your eyes. "A few months," they admit quietly. "But it meant nothing, I swear—"
"Nothing?" The word feels like a slap. "It meant everything to me. You meant everything to me."
Sukuna steps forward, placing a hand on your shoulder, his presence a calming force. "You don't have to forgive them," he says quietly, his eyes never leaving Uraume's. "And they need to understand the consequences of their actions."
A heavy silence falls over the room. Uraume looks like they want to say more, to plead for your forgiveness, but the presence of your brother seems to hold them in check. 
"This is the one?" he asks, his tone deadly as he looks at the servant girl who is cowering in fear.
You nod, unable to tear your gaze away from Uraume's face. "Yes."
In a blur of motion, Sukuna is upon the servant girl. She barely has time to scream before his hand plunges into her chest, tearing out her heart with brutal efficiency. Blood splatters the ground, and the girl's lifeless body crumples at his feet. Uraume watches in horror, their face pale and stricken.
Sukuna turns to Uraume, holding the still-beating heart in his hand before he drops it at Uraume's feet. "This is what you deserve," Sukuna says, his voice cold and final. "Betrayal is met with punishment."
You watch, numb, as Uraume cradles the dead girl in their arms, sobbing. The sight of their pain does little to soothe your own, but there's a grim satisfaction in seeing them suffer for what they've done.
"Her death is your burden to bear," You say to Uraume. "Her blood is on your hands"
When Uraume finally looks up, their eyes red-rimmed and swollen with tears, there's a pleading desperation in their gaze. "My Lady, please," they beg, their voice choked with emotion. "I... I didn't mean for this to happen. I love you, I swear it."
You feel a pang in your chest at their words, a small part of you still clinging to the love you once shared. But it's overshadowed by the overwhelming sense of betrayal, the knowledge that they had chosen someone else over you.
"It's too late for apologies," you say, your voice cold and distant. "You made your choice, Uraume. And now you have to live with the consequences."
Sukuna steps forward, his eyes narrowed in contempt. "Your words are meaningless now," he says, his voice dripping with disdain. "You have proven yourself unworthy of my sister's love. Just as I knew you would"
Uraume's shoulders slump in defeat, the weight of their actions finally settling upon them. They bow their head, unable to meet your gaze. "I understand," they whisper, their voice barely audible. "I deserve whatever punishment you see fit."
"Your punishment is not for me to decide," he says, his eyes flickering to you. "It is for my sister to determine."
You look at Uraume, their form hunched and broken before you, and for a moment, you feel a twinge of pity. But it's quickly overshadowed by the anger and hurt that still simmers within you.
"You will never be forgiven," you say, your voice steady despite the storm of emotions raging inside you. "You are to never serve me personally in this estate, you are to spend your life in servitude to my brother. Whatever he asks of you, you shall do. But know this Uraume, you shall never know love or happiness for as long as I breathe. Any time I see you with a flicker of joy, I shall tear away the source of it"
Sukuna smirks, crossing his arms as he watches you lean down to be eye level with Uraume as poison drips from the words you say.
"There is some darkness in you after all sister," Sukuna says approvingly before he glances at Uraume, his tone turning harsh. "Leave us. Return later to clear up this mess"
As Uraume stumbles away, their steps heavy with the weight of their punishment, you feel a mixture of relief and emptiness wash over you. The air feels heavy with tension as you turn to face Sukuna, his presence towering beside you like a looming shadow.
For a moment, neither of you speaks, the silence stretching between you like a taut thread. Then, Sukuna breaks it with a low chuckle, the sound sending a shiver down your spine.
"You certainly know how to deliver punishment, sister," he says, his voice laced with amusement. "I almost feel sorry for Uraume."
You glance at him, surprised by the hint of amusement in his tone. "You don't think it was too harsh?"
Sukuna shakes his head, his expression serious now. "No," he says firmly. "Uraume betrayed you, and they must face the consequences of their actions. Your punishment was just. I would have executed them"
You nod, a sense of validation washing over you at his words. "Thank you, Sukuna," you say quietly, gratitude colouring your tone.
He reaches out, placing a hand on your shoulder, his touch surprisingly gentle. "You don't have to thank me, sister," he says, his voice softening. "I will always stand by your side, no matter what."
You feel a lump form in your throat at his words, a swell of emotion threatening to overwhelm you. Sukuna may be feared by many, but to you, he is more than just the King of Curses. He is your brother, your protector, the one constant in your life.
"I don't know what I would do without you," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.
Sukuna's grip tightens slightly, a reassuring squeeze that fills you with warmth. "You will never have to find out," he says, his gaze steady and unwavering. "I will always be here for you, sister. Always."
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kingkatsuki · 1 day
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So I was thinking about Kaji heavier kinks. Imagine asking him to slap you, like your cheek or even your cunt but he already has difficulty not slapping your ass as hard as he wants to and now you're asking him to strike your pretty face or your pretty clit.
Those are things he kisses tenderly, how could he ever? Yet still the loving man he is he tries.
One tentative soft slap to your cunt and when you clench and moan out harder you're not realizes you're making a monster
I’ve never written a thirst post so fast in my life I’m actually embarrassed. Also I don’t know if I could ever write Kaji with cunt slaps because I fear I might not survive— that’s an unbelievably hot thought I will store in my head for later😫
Warnings: 18+, spanking, slapping. Probably shouldn’t ask this question during sex either, but I was struck by the horny so help me god smite me if you have a problem goodbye xxx
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“Slap me.” You moaned as Kaji pistoned into you with ferocity, his thrusts had you pushed up against his headboard as your thighs quivered around his waist. Tits bouncing with each sharp rut of his hips as he didn’t miss a beat, his warm palm reached out to strike the side of your thigh roughly. Catching the curve of your ass as you moaned in a mixture of pain and pleasure on contact.
“No, not there—” You gasp as he moves onto his forearms on either side of your face, tilting his head to the side to meet your gaze as he gives you a dark look.
“Then where, pretty girl—“ He brushed his lips against yours, “Tell me—“
“My face,” You gasped as his cock dragged against the spongy spot inside you, “I want you to slap me in the face.”
“No.” Kaji pulled back abruptly, resuming his previous position in front of you as he sat upright on his knees. He would’ve pulled out of you completely if it wasn’t for your thighs keeping him locked in place.
“But you spank me all the time—“ You could already feel the shame and embarrassment flowing through you at the thought that he was kink shaming you, wishing you’d waited to talk to him about this beforehand and not gotten so caught up in the heat of the moment.
“That’s different.” Kaji balked.
“How is it different?” You murmured, reaching out to smooth a palm along his chest.
“It—“ Kaji paused as he pondered his reasoning, his mind instantly filled with how pretty you looked spread out for him as he spanks your ass. Watching it jiggle on impact as the skin prickles beneath his palm, your soft skin darkening and welting as you beg him to do it again, that you can take it, “It just is! I don’t want to hurt you.”
“But I’m asking you to,” You soothed, “I like when you hurt me during sex.”
“Yeah, but what if I really fuckin’ hurt ya,” He pressed, “What if I knock you out?”
“I trust you, Ren.” You replied simply, reaching out to thread your fingers together to squeeze his hand reassuringly, “I wouldn’t even ask you if I didn’t.”
You may trust him, but Kaji sure as hell didn’t trust himself— the pretty sounds you made whenever he spanked you were enough to awaken the voracious depravity he tried his best to keep caged. It had been one too many times he’d spanked your ass a little too hard that he found himself rubbing cream into welts after a season, or watching with worry as you’d wince before sitting down.
Kaji had worked hard over the years to control his emotions, but you were the reason for his loss of control— for the beast he’d become whenever you lay beneath him, ready to devour you whole.
“I’d never force you to do anything, Ren,” You smiled softly, stroking his hand with your thumb, “So if you don’t want to it’s okay.”
“You better tell me if you don’t fuckin’ like it, yeah?” Kaji grumbles, stroking a clammy palm along your thigh.
“Of course, I’d always tell you.”
“I mean it, use the safe word— shove me off—” He presses, sincerity in his steely gaze as his heartbeat speeds up, “Call me a fucking asshole—”
You take the hand that’s linked with yours as you move it up your body towards your face, pressing his palm against your cheek softly as you look up at him with complete love and adoration.
“I trust you.”
Kaji swallows thickly, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat as he tries to remember to breathe. Drawing his palm back to make sure he doesn’t use the full force he knows he’s capable of, fingers clasped together so he doesn’t do more damage than necessary as he tentively leans forward to slap your cheek with purpose.
The hit has your face twisting to the side on impact, and Kaji’s instantly prepared to blurt out an apology when he thinks he’s hurt you. His skin prickles from where his palm made contact with your cheek, as he sees the faintest mark against your perfect skin. But the debauched, desperate whine that leaves your lips is damn near sinful as he feels your cunt clench down around his cock hard.
Kaji moans at the sensation, his blue eyes rolling back as he has to splay a hand out beside your head to stop himself from falling on top of you from how tight you just became. His heavy balls threaten to spill their load prematurely as he tries to focus.
“Fuck.” He exhales, nostrils flaring as he basks in the sight of you. The throb of your cunt around his cock almost enough to throw him over the edge as he pauses for your reaction.
“Again.” You breathe, looking up at him with pleading eyes, “Please, Ren. One more time?”
Maybe you haven’t created a monster, perhaps he has.
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ratscapism · 1 day
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trying to get the rhaenyra theon feelings sorted out in text:
for one, it's the "smiling always smiling" while emotionally guarded vibes. there's a scene in E1 for instance where alicent tries to get rhaenyra to talk about her vulnerabilities and rhaenyra just… blocks. there's several moments where it's like child you are NOT smiling right now but you are! <3 (like during the violence at the tourney). and this air of not taking things seriously enough but actually whenever she reveals her thoughts you notice that she's been paying close attention, that she's bright and focused and that all this is a way to guard her heart. i think you could relate this to them both growing up in somewhat unsafe environments, obviously being winterfell's hostage and growing up in a cut-throat court environment ripe with manipulation and machinations is not quite the same, but in both case you gain a child that does Not Trust (and for good reason!)
the way in which they both need to move around and physically exert themselves to calm down when stressed.
then of course you have the entire, it is my birthright but someone else is considered more suitable/you are not suitable (any more) because you're a hostage/a girl. and some of the unfairness they decry at this is, from a modern pov a bit: well but it is not Good to want that, right? theon: i should get to be an ironborn reaver who commands women and smallfolk. rhaenyra: i should get to be a male heir who may crawl brothels and father countless bastards in inpunity. and it is, sure, aegon and daemon (and robert, and….) all do precisely just that, so i get you, but what they want is also full access to a privilege that is violent in the first place.
related to the theme: is ambition evil? is this type of ambition evil? both don't want to be Bad lords they want to be Good lords but maybe they are driven more closely by emotions. maybe they end up doing things on their road to fight for their ambitions that are violent. tyrannical maybe even. murderous. they have been failed and cheated from what they were indeed entitled to but so should they have just let it go? and both with real emotional familial ties also driving their ambitions - their fathers and their father's wishes, rhaenyra's children.
detail: rash, bold, ambitious, actually pretty clever, and disobedient moves to "prove her worth" that yet earns her no credit and no safety
also the "spoiled brat" "he/she should be more grateful" etc type angle. like yes: clearly they both are noble characters growing up cush at the top of the feudal hierarchies in castles with tutors nice clothing and so on and so forth, so while they complain about life being hard for them many others suffer and starve. but also they are expected to be grateful and obedient to what harms and controls them (theon: the hostage system; rhaenyra: womanhood). and their fears get a bit dismissed. in a meta way. theon feared for his life and in a way, so did also rhaenyra ("my mother was forced to squeeze out heirs until it killed her"). like not wanting that fate is not being an entitled selfish brat. it's not failing at gratitude! and yet!
anddd the sexually abusive evil uncle. well that's way more explicit with rhaenyra of course.
kind of theon also how rhaenyra's victimisation then casts her as "filthy". how her reactions to her circumstances make her a bad survivor who doesn't deserve sympathy any more because of a bad attitude. like, say, the night out with beloved sexually abusive predatory uncle. then coming home from this in a bad way (criston immediately: are you hurt, princess?) and the fallout is she's a whore. latches on to criston, you could say he took advantage of her state but also it's ambiguous and messy and i don't think either of them did something terrible there, but the fallout literally all: she's bad, she's inappropriate, she's irresponsible, she's dirty, how could she! (including the best friend!). but when she then also makes deliberate subsequent choices that prove her deliberation and agency in this, that she means to find sexual joy and she will. which means that….. she never was victimised in the first place? she was irresponsible all along? "she gets to have everything"? spoiled cunt after all?
generally i feel the way in which all these factors - playing it with a smile, acting wilful, being trouble, having a "bad attitude" make her into, idk, Not Deemed Vulnerable. as they say about theon: he was treated soooo well!
also not sure whom to connect that to - not euron, not thramsay, not throbb, but WHAT is this relationship with daemon! i'm So interested yet so upset. maybe the seeking safety, power and freedom in hurtful places. ending up yet very alone with how you're being harmed. of course, this is all extremely, extremely bleak. theon is about seeking freedom and breaking free which all devolves into horror but that doesn't mean that the seeking was meaningless nor that there aren't pockets of escape. i guess i'm always more interested when the paths of victim-perpetrator-agency-entrapment converge so messily, maybe that's the connection. (but the choking scene! i knew this was going to be bleak, but this is really very bleak.)
rhaenicent-throbb has been compared already from what i see and sure you have the close very special friend who is also your king/queen who may command you and whom you let down and maybe for halfway good reason (rhaenyra DID lie to alicent but also her mistrust was well-placed?) but the "betrayal" if you should even call it that is still catastrophic. part of if isn't even rhaenyra's fault but viserys's and otto's joint work but then neither was everything theon's fault. i thought you and i were in this together but then you do this to me. you leave me behind with all this, having destroyed some of what was dear to me, and i trusted you! but then of course alicent is certainly no robb. selkie is correct here in stating they both are theon.
to end on a slightly positive note from the theon emotions pov rhaenyra's (brief) luck in creating this queer little family built on mutual trust and friendship and protection is rather what i would hope could be possible for theon in the future. including having 'heirs'. i mean of course the thing with rhaenyra's heirs is they actually are her heirs (her being the mother) and yet there's all sorts of complications as we can see. so maybe my fantasising about smooth underhanded greyjoy succession has been a bit too rosy lol.
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