#but i wanted to try and make something even if it is a lil contribution

[ltbunny]

Talking to Simon in a bar, it's mostly just you talking at him and him nodding along, taking big swigs of his beer so he doesn't have to pull up his mask too often. Sitting side by side in the booth instead of across from each other, he says its cause you're too quiet but it's definitely so he can keep his arm wrapped around your waist, hands busy on your rolls, kneading them unnecessarily, stuck to your side, knees bumping each others while you nurse your drink and run the conversation,

"I've always wanted a snake, you know? I love snakes, they're so pretty and adorable,"

and ghost finally opens his mouth to contribute to the conversation

"Snakes are nice, what type do you want?"

"Hm, like.. I would love a big boy. My favourite is an emerald tree boa constrictor, but maybe start off with something smaller, maybe an albino,"

His arm slides up without warning, slinging it around your shoulder, pressing down, his fingers gripping your neck, squeezing. not harshly, but not lightly either. your eyes widen, and you look at him, a slight blush covering your cheeks, making a little shocked squeak,

"Wha-"

"This is how heavy it would be, a big python, heavier even. Bundled up around your shoulders, around your neck." He squeezes his fingers, the grin under his mask shown through his eyes, "You can take it right? A big guy, choking you out, wrapping around your pretty lil' neck."

"Come on, stop messi-"

"Of course you would be able to take it, you're a good girl, you'd take care of 'em... anyway, it wouldn't even be a good pet, cold-blooded piece of shit, but you'd still love it anyway, right? That's just how you are, love...

He let's go and chugs down his beer, his eyes still looking at you from the side, silent again for a while, while both of you try to collect your thoughts. You open your mouth to talk, but you're interrupted once again.

"Don't get a snake. You have me, how many more cold blooded shits do you need in your life, I can choke you out, contrict you, maybe not coil around you but i can leave you feeling helpless anytime you please, love."

He murmurs, his voice low, pressed up close to you, his balaclava ghosting your ear, his arm back around your waist, squeezing your thighs.

"...what about right now?"

"..."

He gets up and slams two 20 quid notes on the table and drags you out the bar, his grip tight. You two don't even make it home. He opts for the ginnel next to the bar. Half an hour after you left the bar you're pumped full of cum, your throat is sore and you're covered in hickeys. Over ghost or a snake, pretty sure you'll choose ghost every time.

[http-tokki]

need to know

~ choso kamo x fem!reader (tattoo artist choso au) ~tags/cw: tattoo artist choso, fem reader, tattoo artist au, tattoos, needles, satosugu is canon, modern au, choso has a scar over his nose instead of his markings, strangers to friend to lovers (strangers rn) tiny lil man verbal bashing cause men are weak lil babies when getting tattoos, reader is a lil chubby, choso is on antidepressants, smoking/vaping, drinking ~ wc: 2.9k ~ "Dude, he is so fucking hot. I wasn't expecting him to look like that!! What do I do?!! Help?!?"

You: Wednesday 8:45pm Hi, I was just wondering if your books were still open? It says they are in your bio but in case I've missed it and they're closed, please ignore this message, sorry! :)

Kamo: Wednesday 9:23pm Hey. No, they are still open. When were you looking to book? Do you have a specific design? Or are you looking for a flash?

 

You: Thursday 11:36am Oh, hi, awesome! Thank you for getting back to me so quickly! I was looking to book next month, towards the end. On a weekend if that would be possible (I don't mind the time), and for the design, just a flash (design 3A) on your latest post on my upper arm, around 15-20cm. :)

You: Thursday 11:52pm Unless you think it should be smaller or somewhere else, I'm not picky! I really want something of yours tattooed on me :)

 Kamo: Thursday 12:15pm Sure, no problem! I have the 24th free at 12pm. Does that work for you? The spot and size are fine, but I'll make up smaller and bigger stencils on the day in case you change your mind. The total would be $600 for the piece. However, I require a $100 deposit to secure your spot. I can send you the payment details once you confirm your interest. Please read through my FAQs on cancellation policies and further information.

You: Thursday 12:20pm 24th at 12pm is perfect! Thank you!! I'll send a deposit through now! Ahh, so excited! :)

 

Kamo: Thursday 1:07pm You're welcome. Here is the link x. Please send a screenshot of your payment as proof. For the rest of the amount, I accept cash only. If you have any other questions, feel free to message me. See you on the 24th.

You: Thursday 3:30pm Sending it now! Yay! Thank you so much! Super excited, see you! :)

Kamo: Thursday 4:35 pm Seen 

--

 "I sound like an idiot, don't I?" you grumble as your friend reads over your chat with a tattoo artist.

You watch your friend tilt their glasses down, squinting at the screen as their mouth curls into a grimace. They try to hide it with a sniffle, disguising their obvious disgust over your intense enthusiasm.

"Not an idiot," they hand the phone back to you, a frown set in the crooked way it always did when they were uncomfortable. "Just really, really eager, which can be cute if you like that."

--

Choso is growing tired. 

At what? There are too many contributing factors to the headache that had begun blooming his eyes five minutes after stepping into the studio to pinpoint the main culprit of his budding exhaustion. Maybe it was the late night/early morning combo, or perhaps it was the horrific lack of water and food he hadn't consumed in the last twenty-four hours. When was the last time he had taken his medication? Choso begins to run through the previous days in an attempt to remember when he had even glanced at the Zoloft sheet sitting in the bottom drawer of his trolley, but his attention is diverted from his lack of self-care to the man sitting in his tattoo chair. 

It is coming up on the two-hour mark since his client walked in. With a brazen attitude that could rival a Greek god, the man had outlined what had to be the simplest fucking tattoo known to man. Choso had rolled his eyes at the frankly impressive and thorough drawing done by the twenty-something gym bro before shifting the paper off to his younger brother. 

"Come on, it's easy! An hour tops, and then you've got like two fifty in your hand! You technically owe me an observation session, and this can be it." Yuji had gripped his brother's sleeve, tugging on it the way he used to when they were kids. 

Taking in his younger half-brother as his apprentice was a good idea in theory. The two lived and worked together, so there was ample time for obvs and practice, but today was already busy, and Choso was feeling like complete and utter shit. 

"Yuji, I don't want to do this. I have a client coming in at twelve for a full session, and I've got this headache and-"

"It's easy money, come on! Please." it technically was easy money. The design was a small band wrapped around the bicep, with no adornments or script, just a flat black line; it was the client himself that made Choso apprehensive. 

"Fine." Choso sighed, and Yuji almost jumped into the air in excitement. "You prep and clean him; I'm not doing anything but the actual tattoo." 

Yuji nodded eagerly and just about ran into the front room to confirm the walk-in appointment. 

That was almost two hours ago, and Choso is still here, finishing up the outlines of the band on a guy twice his size but carrying on like a toddler. Each touch of the needle on skin had the man flinching and hissing through his teeth, and there is only so much Choso could take. 

Choso eyes the clock nervously, his next appointment slot ticking closer but the second. There isn't going to be enough time to get out and grab a coffee or snack from the corner store. After another quick glance at the amount of work before him, Choso calls it fifteen minutes to twelve and clicks off the tattoo gun with a disappointed sigh.

 "Hey, I'm sorry, but we might have to split this into two sessions." 

He looks back over at this current client, who is sweating profusely. It takes everything in him to scowl in disgust at the once brazen man before him, but not the look on his client's face; Choso knows some form of repugnance had slipped through his composure. 

 "Yeah, sure, man, no sweat," the client replies, relief blatant in his sigh. "Sorry for taking so many breaks. I've got a weak pain tolerance."

That makes Choso feel a little bad.

"You're fine. I've just got a pre-booked client coming in like ten and need to set up." A little lie to hurry the man up. 

Hope is so close. So attainable that Choso can almost feel the sun on his face, but the shop bells slice through any dream of a break. 

"Hi, I'm here for my twelve with Kamo?" 

Choso slouches, attention now on the conversation happening in the front room. It's not even twelve yet! Why would she be here so early? 

"Yep! We've got you down for twelve, but Choso's still with someone, so if you wanna wait here, that's okay!" Yuji giggles in response. 

"Ohh, I'm just here to ask if umm…Choso wanted a coffee or anything?" his name is a question on her tongue. "I'm going to go get one and wanted to ask if anyone wanted anything so you don't have to wait in line." 

That's nice. Choso thinks and leans back on his chair, attempting to glimpse his new client, who has Yuji giggling at every word. 

"I was just about to step out to get coffee so I can come with you, but I can get Cho's; you don't need to pay for him." Another giggle. God, his younger brother is shameless. 

"That's okay! I can get them; just write your orders down so I don't forget!" the girl insists.  

"Ohh, but-"disappointment fills Yuji's voice. 

"Yuji, can you come here please!" Choso shouts down the hall, pulling his brother away from his new crush. 

Yuji groans, then the shop bells ring again, and then the sound of footsteps shuffles down the hall. 

"Yes?" 

"Can you wrap him up and finish the payment? I need a smoke." Choso rolled back from the bed, handing over the second skin he has yet to unwrap. 

Choso's brother sighs but offers the male client a friendly smile, sits down in the now vacant rollaway stool, and begins to prep the skin for wrap-up.

"I'll be back in five; if anyone needs me, tell them to wait." Choso grumbles the last part and offers a stiff wave to his current client before disappearing into the hall. 

 The knots in Choso's shoulder have been building for days now, and no amount of rolling or stretching seems to relieve the tension in his muscles, but it is nice to stretch and feel the blood move around him again. Heavy boots echo through the small shop as he stalks to the front desk, floorboards creaking under the weight of thick rubber soles. His fingers slip into his back pocket to reach for the small pack of menthols hastily shoved down after the abrupt end of his morning break. 

Stepping out into the world, Choso is blinded by the sun. Having forgotten about the passage of time while being stuck indoors all day, he now stands stunned in the small alcove of the shop's entrance. The sun nears the centre of the sky, beating down the world in a heat never seen before. It wasn't even the beginning of summer, and the sweltering days were breaking temperature records. Choso shields his eyes with a hand, and even then, his vision is blurred as his retinas adjust. 

The street is quiet; an abnormal silence had fallen over the usually busy road, but with the rising blistering temps, he suspects people aren't willing to brave the heat to shop or eat. Choso finds the familiar recess in the wall, a door had been there years ago but has long since been boarded up and now acts as refuge for him and his brother. Through any weather, time of day or season, the small alcove is a sanctuary for tired and burnt-out artists needing a second away from the constant buzz of tattoo guns. 

Choso scans the few open cafes and bars for his mystery client. Mainly office workers on lunch break and mothers with strollers waiting for the afternoon pick up; he can't see anyone that fits the image he had concocted in his mind on the short walk over until he spots a girl standing in line across the way. The tattoos that adorn her legs are what Choso notices first. Patchwork pieces from different artists in black and white with pops of colour here and there, but for the most part are monochromatic, all spaced far enough to be their own pieces but not so much that they seem gap-y. He is impressed at the choice, knowing that when getting patchwork pieces, they are usually slapped in any available location, but from what he can see, every piece flowed into each other and told a story against her skin. Her arms are equally as covered, though with more room, and he is eager to see the works up close. A flash of pink catches his attention, and he narrows his attention on the pink My Melody backpack that she swings at her side, pink wallet clutched in her free hand as she shifts her weight from her toes to her heels. Choso smirks at the bag and finds himself willing her to turn so he can see the face of the girl who we had been staring at for the past five minutes. 

He is staring and he needs to stop before he gets caught. Shifting his attention from the random woman, he fishes out his phone and focuses on the seemingly endless DMs and texts stacked on the lock screen. Sometimes, he wonders if he really should have gone into a career where his livelihood relied on communicating with strangers. With expert precision and one hand, he pulls a cigarette from the crumpled packet and slips the filter between his teeth. Biting down the filter, the taste of menthol fills his mouth, and relief floods his veins before settling in the deep groves of his brain. The cigarette isn't even lit yet, but his nervous system knows that the taste of mint will soon be followed by nicotine, and all will be well for a few minutes. Breaking the habit of smoking has been on Choso's New Year's resolution lists for the past three years, but he only ever lasts a few weeks before turning back to the comfort of those overpriced joints. Maybe next year will be the year. Choso digs through his pockets, fingers grasping for the lighter he keeps in his right pant pocket, but there is nothing. Maybe the other side? Still nothing. Third pocket? Fourth pocket? Nada. Zilch. Zero. Fuck. 

There isn't enough time to go back inside to search for matches, and he had already popped the filter and doesn't want to waste the smoke, but it would get gross sitting in the packet- his headache grew. 

"Choso?" a soft voice asks from above.

Choso looks up from his lap and is greeted by the most stunning woman he has ever seen. Breathing is no longer automatic as he stares at you, and when his lungs start to contract almost painfully, he realises and takes in an all too obvious breath.

It wasn't fair to look like that. With the sun illuminating your silhouette, cradling you in an angelic aura that has Choso debating on whether he should get on his knees and pray to you, but too much time has passed since you spoke and he acknowledged you that he has to say something, but all he can manage is a muffled yeah?

"I'm your twelve, but you look like you need a light?" you hold out a bright pink light between pretty pink manicured fingers. 

Choso offers a tight-lipped smile to prevent the cigarette from falling from his mouth and takes the lighter, flicking it to life. "Thanks, I owe ya."

He holds the flame to the tobacco, and only when it glows bright does he pull the disposable away.

"It didn't cost me anything, so nothing to owe."

There is a beat of silence as you throw the light back into your bag before bending down to pick up the coffee you had set at your feet. "Also, a coffee." another offer towards him. 

"The guy at the desk gave me your order, and I always buy my artists something before a session. I'm not hitting on you."

Your admission of this not being a move stirs something in him. Choso accepts the cold cup with a soft thank you, angling his hand away from yours, careful not to burn you with the lit smoke.

 "I'll meet you inside. Give you a moment to yourself." you nod towards the door of the studio, feet already turning to start walking towards the entrance. 

He watches you walk away, a smile creeping on his face despite not knowing why. You're as cute from the front as you are from the back, and he's glad the girl he had seen in the coffee shop is you. Soft curves make up your figure, dipping at your waist before filling out again over your bust. Choso feels his stomach twist in that familiar feeling, but he can't think of you like that; you're a client and nothing more. There is a mesmerising way in which you walk that has Choso unable to look away, and even when you've stepped into the studio, his gaze lingers on the empty space you once stood in until the rancid taste of burnt filter fills his mouth. Never in his life has he been as thankful for coffee as he is in that moment when burnt paper fills his senses. Taking a big gulp of the sweet but still bitter drink, it takes everything in him not to spit in the street, but he was raised better than that and will wait until he is in the small bathroom to spit up the gross contents.

 --

 When Choso returns, you are sitting on the small couch in the waiting room, filling out consent forms. Head down as you read the number of your ID and scribe it down in the open line; he walks past you, suddenly horrified by his heavy choice of shoe. The thick thud of the rubber soles on the hardwood has you lifting your head and smiling at your artist. Choso feels his stomach flip.

"So," Choso starts, but the smoke still in his throat chokes the word. He clears his throat and restarts his sentence. "So, do you smoke, or do you just carry the lighter?"

"My best friend smokes, so I just carry it 'cause you never know when you're gonna need a light." Your laugh is contained, almost forced, as if the interaction you are having is uncomfortable for you. Had he done something wrong?

"Ohh." Is his only reply as you return to the balanced folder on your lap.

Another moment of silence before Choso steps towards the hall. "I'll let Yuji check you in, and then just come in when you're ready." Had he already made you that uncomfortable in the two minutes you had spoken outside? Choso takes a deep breath as he steps into his space and suddenly wishes the whiney baby was the one getting tattooed.

--

You: Saturday 12:05pm Dude, he is so fucking hot. I wasn't expecting him to look like that!! What do I do?!! Help?!?

Number ONE best friend: Saturday 12:06pm suck his dick? ik guys like that :P 

You: Saturday 12:06pm Idk what I expected from you. I need actual advice, please Saturo. U owe me!

Number ONE best friend: Saturday 12:07pm ooh first name, you're kinda scary. Okay, here is what you do. You act like a normal human and then flirt a lil and suss out if he's into it and then ask him out to drinks?

You: Saturday 12:08pm That works if I KNEW HOW TO FLIRT. Ugh im screwed, he's so fine fuck

Number ONE best friend: Saturday 12:09pm eww, you're getting ur jizz all over the screen. just breathe and be normal okay, pretend he's me.

You: Saturday 12:10pm  Ignoring the first comment. Im gonna sneak a pic and show u BRO YOU NEED TO SEE HIM

Number ONE best friend: 12:10pm creepy but okeeeeyyy. Sugu also says to breathe and be normal but to ignore anything you think I would do

You: Saturday 12:11pm Thanks, Suguru, please kill him for me, ill talk to u guys in a bit

Number ONE best friend:  good luck bestie 8======D

a/n: okay so there is going to be a part two but I'm not sure when, please give me feedback if you want it or want me to stop, put the laptop down and go outside lmao lil texting format, lemme know how y'all feel about that

[hyperactively-me]

king!ghost x reader -- learning, growing

A few days have passed since Simon almost kissed you. 

With him, around him, you felt more comfortable, more at ease. It wasn’t easy getting to this point with him, but spending time with him has strengthened you in ways you could have never imagined. 

The palace, once a place of hostility and responsibility, began to feel like a true home filled with kindness and understanding. Time spent together was precious, and you cherished each moment of vulnerability. The late-night conversations and the quiet, whispered laughter in the corridors all contributed to the connection you had forged.

Simon's loyalty and strength became even more apparent as you got to know him. He was a king who would move heaven and earth to protect his people, especially his friends, and he was also a man who would move mountains for you. He made you feel cherished and secure, and your affection for him deepened with each passing day.

One evening, while you were curled up on the couch, Simon spoke candidly about his past. “I've always been so focused on my duty as a king that I never really had the chance to explore my own interests or hobbies. But since you came into my life, I’ve noticed the way you do all of these things, and I admire you for that.”

Your eyes twinkled with happiness as you listened intently. “Aw, really? Lil ole me?"

He smiled, his eyes reflecting a genuine enthusiasm. “Well, for one, I've developed a newfound love for books. I’m always lookin’ over your shoulder when you read, y’know.”

You couldn't help but grin at his admission, your eyes lighting up. “Aww, I’m glad that you think so, Simon.” 

Simon nods. “And I've realized that there's so much more I want to explore. I know there has to be something out there for me.” 

Your heart swelled with pride at his willingness to embrace new experiences. “I think that's wonderful, Simon. You should explore whatever makes you happy."

He also asked questions about your own interests and hobbies, wanting to understand you. You shared your love for gardening with him, and soon, you both started tending to a small garden in the palace courtyard. He was definitely hesitant at first, never really confident in his abilities in the garden, but over time, you taught him how to nurture the plants. Simon's dedication, his strong hands carefully tending to each flower and shrub, was something you’d never thought you’d see. It was so sweet seeing him try something new just because you liked it. 

A few days have passed since your little moment on the couch before he was pulled away from  you because of his responsibilities as king. It was after dinner, the sun was setting, and you wanted to watch the sunset. 

Hand in hand, you made your way through the dimly lit corridors, your heart fluttering as he pushed open a balcony door for you. The sky was painted in hues of orange and pink, the sun casting a golden shimmer across the landscape. You stepped onto the balcony, the cool breeze tousling your hair, and the soft rustling of leaves in the palace gardens creating a soothing ambiance.

Simon stands next to you, his presence comforting. With his arm around your waist, he pulls you closer, his eyes fixed on the horizon.

“I—,” he starts, his voice barely above a whisper, as if afraid to disturb the delicate peace of the evening.

You nestle against him, feeling the warmth of his body, and the reassuring beat of his heart. “What?” you question softly. 

“I can’t get enough of you,” he whispers, his voice husky with emotion. 

You smiled, feeling the same overpowering attraction. “Nor can I,” you admitted, your hands coming to wrap around his waist.

“No, I mean it. You…there’s no words to describe how much you’ve grown to mean to me,” he trails off. He pulls you into his chest, hands coming down to rest on your waist. 

Simon's thumb gently caressed your cheek as he looked at you, his eyes filled with longing. “Every moment with you, I just feel…fulfilled,” he murmured.

“Simon—"

“No, don’t say anything, just— let me…” he leans in, lowering his head down, mere centimeters from your face. Your heart races in your chest, threatening to sprint right out.

"Kiss me," you nearly beg, gripping onto him tightly.

And with a small breath, he captures your lips in a searing kiss.

His arms envelope you in a tight, secure embrace, pulling you right up against him, and you melt into his touch. You grab onto his shirt, bunching the fabric as you push up on your toes to reach him easier. The world outside seemed to disappear as you explore each other's mouths, savoring the taste with every kiss you give him. 

He groans slightly as your arms come up around his neck, tugging gently at the hair on the nape of his neck. He squeezes the flesh of your waist as he presses into you. Suddenly, he flips you, pressing you against the bar of the balcony, kissing you like a man starved. He cups the back of your head, one arm secure around your waist to make sure you don’t fall. He would never let go of you, never let you fall, and you know it. Your mouth tastes so good, feels like velvet, like everything and more he imagined it to be. He pulls away for a moment, his breath hot as he lets out small pants. He licks his swollen lips, eyes not parting from yours. 

“Simon–”

He groans, then pushes his face into your neck.

“Darlin’, if you say my name one more time, I’m not going to be able to hold myself back,” he mumbles into your skin, breathing in your scent.

You still as he speaks, hands coming up to scratch his back gently. You had never gone this far with a man, no, not even back at home. This was something you had never experienced before, something that meant more than just a simple kiss. Something more. 

“Okay,” you say, your voice barely a whisper. 

He kisses your neck, leaving sloppy open-mouthed kisses along your sensitive skin. He pulls away suddenly, his hands still locked around your frame.

“Was it too much?” he asks, stroking his thumb against you over your clothes.

“No, no, it’s just, I’ve never– I’ve never done this before,” you say softly. “But, I’m glad it was with you. It couldn’t have been more perfect,” you say, stroking the contours of his face.

You speak gently, knowing what he was insinuating with his words. “Do you want to…?”

“No, no, not like this, not now” he says quickly. “You deserve better than something quick. You deserve to be treated with respect.” 

You nod slowly, warmth creeping up your cheeks.

“And I thank you for respecting me all this time,” you say, smiling softly at him. “But, right now, I want to do this. With you. And only with you.”

His heart rate picks up as he takes in your words. The moment he’s been waiting for. For your permission. For your yes.

He would show you what you deserve.

- - - - -

(masterlist) 

[sidekick-hero]

On April 2nd, freshly delivered to AO3: Emotional Motion Sickness, my contribution to the @strangerthingsreversebigbang inspired by art from the amazing @arimakes

Have a lil snippet as a treat 💜

When he looks at Eddie again, he sees that the other man is already looking back at him. A warm smile is on his face, which Steve returns without thinking. It grows even wider when Eddie takes his hand in his own and caresses his knuckles.

"So, I just had at least twenty different conversations with you in my head and none of my opening lines were any good. You were great, don't worry, you said all the right things." Steve laughs at the sheer ridiculousness of it all. He didn't pick Eddie to be a Casanova, but definitely a charmer. And while Eddie is charming, he's apparently also a total dork.

In other words, he is exactly Steve's type.

"I hope you'll forgive me if I mess up this one too, I'm trying a new approach," Eddie announces, clearing his throat. "Steve, would you allow me the honor of showing you that kink can be different than what you just described?"

When Steve says nothing for too long, Eddie adds hastily, "Not that you were wrong, not at all. Everything you described is kink, and I'm pretty sure you'd find people here for all those things. I'm just saying I could show you a different part of it, one you might like. Or not, which would be totally fine. We can stop at any time and you can say no to anything, consent is the most important thing.” Without really waiting for an answer, Eddie barrels on. "God, I'm really screwing this up, aren't I? Twenty-one tries and I'm still fumbling it, no wonder I was always picked last in gym class.“

Steve, who, thanks to his friendship with Robin, can spot a nervous rambler from a mile away, flips their hands, laces his fingers with Eddie's and squeezes his hand. "Deep breaths, Eddie. You're fine, I promise. It's actually a sweet offer, and I hope the "me" in your head told you that, too.”

Staring at their joined hands with a smile, Eddie ducks his head and looks back at Steve with a painfully sincere, hopeful expression on his face. God, he's so screwed, Steve thinks, an all too familiar feeling tugging at his heart. No, no, no, way too soon, abort, he scolds his heart, but he knows it's not listening. It never does.

"So? What do you think? Or if you need more time to think, that's totally cool, too." Eddie tells him earnestly and Steve believes him. He can tell how much Eddie wants him to say yes, but he's willing to wait for Steve, no matter how long it takes. Steve has no idea how he can know that, since he doesn't know much more about the man than his name, but he does. It's in the way Eddie keeps smiling at him, his thumb running absentmindedly over the back of Steve's hand, his body language open and soft.

As he keeps looking at the man in front of him, Steve marvels at how different it feels to be wanted by Eddie. The guys he had been with before had been easy, a sure thing, their hunger for Steve palpable but shallow. Easily satiated and discarded. With Eddie, it's deeper, more substantial. He makes Steve feel wanted in a different way, not as a means to an end. Rather, it feels like at this moment, there is nothing in this world for Eddie but Steve and the prospect of taking Steve home and exploring something new with him. It's heady and warm and Steve wants to say yes.

Steve had wanted to say yes to Eddie the moment he first laid eyes on him, if he's being honest.

So he does. He tells Eddie he'd love to and bathes in the sheer glow of Eddie's answering smile.

Just like when he entered the Hideout tonight, he has no idea what he's getting into, but at least this time he's not alone.

A special shout out to my cheerleaders @firefly-party and @thefreakandthehair as well as @starrystevie and of course for the most amazing beta @acasualcrossfade who picked this one apart and helped me put it back together even better. Love you guys! 💜🥰

[homobrainjuice]

y’all can I be real with y’all for a minute (or atleasts, people who are still here)

when I joined tumblr, a LOT of people started interacting with me and my art, which was mainly OSC (object show community). But soon my OSC hyperfixation started being replaced by other ones and school and me wanting to focus on ocs and eeehhh. It feels like ever since I slowed down with the OSC stuff my moots who once interacted with me everyday have kinda just…. Left me alone.? I understand this might have something To do with me deleting a lot of my messages (which was mainly out of fear of my parents) and it’s kinda started taking a toll on me ig? Like I had abandonment issues before this but this?!!?!?! Damn. I know it’s probably none of y’all’s fault (it’s probably mainly mine). But uh even before that…. Any post that wasn’t OSC realstes never EVER got as much attention. It kinda contributed to me feeling inadequate ig? Like it I didn’t post these personified objects my friends won’t care anymore? But now I’ve put a focus on my personal lil guys (Wild! And that unnamed comic featuring Christian(ish?) mythology) and I was really excited thinking all my bestest buddies would be SUPER hyped about them. But eh..? None of y’all are really here anymore. Tbh. I miss you guys :(((( I miss y’all so much. I know life and school has been rough for a lot of you :( I’ve been distant. I’ve only really kept Fizzy close (love you lil bro/p) I really hope I didn’t hurt any of you :( life is hard guys. But I’m going to try my best over the summer to bring you guys outstanding content that will make you guys smile. Even if it’s not about objects. I hope y’all don’t mind the tags here

@akalikestodraw, @peppermintz-25, @thatonesalmonlingnamedspike, @maxphilippa, @s1lv3rp4w3dc4t, @mochablogger, @wowwzaaxei-aster, @lemonpie45, @yourfriendlyshapeshiftermonsters, @knightobreath, @koduflower2000, @galaxy-brushs-posts, @devycolamy, @blairzart, @trashbins-stuff, @biblicallyaccuratefour, @sillyosclover, and many, many others, I love you/p, I miss you. I haven’t forgotten about you. I hope summer will give me more time and energy to interact with y’all (if u want) I will bring you many goodies. Even if it’s not in the form of a colorful juice box. I’ve got TWO✌️💕2️⃣‼️ webcomics planned that ARENT unbalanced breakfast (that entirely depends on me and Fizzy’s will to work on it together but we both have other things we wanna make) I can only hope everyone is along for the ride. So uh… yeah. Just wanted to get this off my chest. How y’all been doing lately :)! If not well I hope it gets better, honestly. I’d like to think my purpose is to bring others joy through my creations, I hope that’s what I can provide for you all! And others who are new :). Love y’all/p. Have a good night or day :D!

[the-badger-mole]

How do you think the Avatar (either Korra or your own personal OC) after Aang would view him? It's clear from the canon that he had his own disagreements with his own past lives. Do you think they would try to make amends or fix any damage Aang caused?

To me, Korra was enamored with both being the Avatar and really emotionally invested in Tenzin and his family. I don't think as a young woman she it would occur to her to think more critically about her predecessor's legacy. But since she cut ties to the past Avatars, and now had the opportunity to start a brand new legacy, I would hope that she would look back at Aang's life and see all the holes in his time as Avatar, and that she would take time to hear from Kya and Bumi about their experience with him, and understand what an imperfect, neglectful, and arrogant person he was. I don't think she would change her mind about Aang being more or less a good person and successful Avatar, but I'd like to think that she tried to learn from his mistakes.

Mostly, though, I think the problems with Aang and his tenure as Avatar would be things for historians to pick through. I think history would ultimately be the judge of Aang. It would take someone less personally invested in Aang legacy to look at the Acolytes and Aang's lil' fandom and see how weird and gross it was that the Air Nomad culture wasn't the center of their admiration and even worship, and that Aang had built up something like a cult around him. I think history would look at his energybending and be glad that that particular power had died with him. I also think that Aang's attitude about bending and the superiority of the Air Nomad culture would be listed as a contributing factor to the equalist movement. I really do think that LoK missed an opportunity to have an honest conversation about Aang's imperfections and how it affected his family and his time as Avatar. It almost make me want to write a "biography" for him.

[xpao-bearx]

"Partners In Crime"

Officer Callahan x Bad Girl!Reader

SUMMARY: As the resident "bad girl" of Hawkins, you truly only want one thing: to get into the pants of the resident dorky and dedicated police officer, Phil Callahan (and hey, maybe steal his heart too!).

NOTES: I recently just finished Stranger Things and yeah, great show, but have you SEEN the men??? 👀 Anyhoe, being the ✨️whore✨️ that I am, it really comes as no surprise that I'm simping over all the hot dudes but one of the hotties I've become obsessed with is CRIMINALLY underrated 😭

And so, of course, I took this grave offense ✨️personally✨️ and wrote this lil piece! Though I can't really call it little because it is SHOCKINGLY long (for me) and I sacrificed hours upon hours of sleep 🥲 But hey, when Phil fucking Callahan (and his gorgeous actor John Reynolds) makes you horny and inspired, YOU👏SEIZE👏THE👏GODDAMN👏MOMENT👏

If it isn't already obvious, this fic contains 18+ SMUT AND MATURE CONTENT and it gets preeetty steamy if I do say so myself~ It's also set roughly around Season 2, and I say roughly cuz I suck at remembering plots and shit so I just went with the flow 😅 And as always, PLEASE don't be a silent reader! Likes, comments, and reblogs are VERY much encouraged and appreciated!! \(^o^)/

I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing this baby! This is my first ever humble contribution to the ST fandom and, who knows, MAYBE not my last ;)

In the small town of Hawkins, you were popular as the "bad girl". You were loud, headstrong, and constantly got into trouble--completely unlike any of the "proper" ladies that talked shit behind your back. But the trouble you caused, despite the chaos it unfailingly left behind, was never anything actually hurtful. Hell, you were even caught a few times using your colourful language to make some middle school children cry when you saw them bullying some poor boys (one of them, you remember, being the Wheelers' son who always looked like trouble followed him himself).

A bad girl with a golden heart; a cheesy, living cliché. But that's what you were. You just wanted to have fun, to live in the moment. But in this bumfuck town where pretty much nothing happens before that Byers kid mysteriously disappeared then reappeared, how could anyone really blame you for trying to stir shit up simply for your own entertainment and for your damn sanity?

But some of the locals knew you on a personal level. Particularly, the Hawkins Police Department. Before you stumbled upon Hawkins a few years ago, you were a drifter; chasing after the high of wherever life would take you, free yet lost. Whether it was by chance or by fate, you only stopped at Hawkins to fuel up your motorcycle and have a quick bite at the local diner until suddenly--like something out of those fucking romcoms your mother used to watch--you met him.

Phil Callahan. He was only a rookie officer at the time, having not even grown out his beloved moustache yet. You noticed his police cruiser parked at the gas station with an evident bump on the front of the car. He was fuelling up, but his hand holding the pump was limp and he was as pale as a ghost; eyes comically wide behind his horn-rimmed glasses, brunette locks tousled and sticking out every which way after frantically running his free hand through it god knows how many times.

And staring at this clearly stressed, slightly pathetic man, all you could think was: HOT.

Before your brain could process what you were doing (though, let's be honest, you never really used your brain much in most of your life decisions), you found your feet walking away from your bike of their own accord and towards him.

Once you were by his side, it's only then that you realized just how tall he was. So much taller. He easily towered over you and it made your mind drift to other, much less innocent thoughts.

Namely him bending you over his car and fucking you within an inch of your sorry excuse of a life.

"Can I help you?" Your head snapped up from the stranger's voice, eyes meeting his narrowed ones. And--dammit!--he was much more unfairly handsome up close. His light brown eyes reflected almost green, raising a suspicious brow at you as his lips pressed into a tight line.

"Sorry, Officer--" Your gaze strayed to his shiny name tag, a grin tugging up the corners of your mouth. "--Callahan. I just couldn't help but notice you. You look like you just died inside, man."

His brows furrowed, glancing over his shoulder to the bump on his car before quickly darting back to you. "Thanks for your concern, ma'am, but I'm fine. Nothing a civilian should be worried about, anyway."

"If you don't mind--" You piped up once more as he set the pump away. "I think it's got something to do with that nasty bump ya got there, huh?"

"Uh, okay, actually I do mind." He sighed exasperatedly, no longer able to hide his growing aggravation. Today was just not his day, it seemed. "Ma'am, like I said, it is none of your concern." He put on his police hat, tipping it to you. "Good day."

As he turned away from you, you sidestepped him so that you were in front of him again. Your grin was much bigger this time, practically reaching your ears. "Uh-oh, are you in trouble, Mr. Policeman~?" You purred, one hand reaching out and playfully drumming your fingers along his chest. You intently studied him from head to toe, as if admiring an artistic masterpiece before biting your lip and giggling. "Lemme guess... You're a young, new police officer who doesn't know any better. You got so excited driving a police car for the first time that you drove it a bit too fast and crashed into a tree or some shit. Sound about right?"

His face flushed scarlet, and you weren't sure if it was from the shame of having his dumbass misdemeanor exposed or from your fingers making a shiver run down his spine--probably both.

"How do you--"

"This ain't exactly my first time having a lil run-in with the law, so I know how men like you work." You winked. "Hey, tell ya what, how 'bout I help you? You can tell your other piggy buddies that I'm some crazy bitch with anger issues you caught for speeding and in my oh so scary rage, I purposely crashed my motorbike to the front of your car just to fuck with you. You can even put cuffs on me~"

He blinked, utterly dumbstruck as he stared down at the total menace that was you (and the fact that a certain part of him reacted at you graciously allowing him to cuff you), feeling like forever until he finally found his voice that cracked slightly as he spoke. "Who the fuck are you?"

"Y/N L/N." You hummed, wrapping your arms around his neck as you leaned up on your tiptoes and dangled slightly off of him with the few inches left between the two of you. The sudden action caught him completely off guard, his hands dropping to your hips to support you and making him blush even redder. But you didn't care, smiling mischievously up at him. "Feel free to search me up in the system, Officer. I've got a permanent record, after all~"

And that's how you met Jim Hopper, Calvin Powell, and the rest of the Hawkins Police Department when Callahan brought you with him back to the station. They definitely didn't believe you guys, especially when you didn't have a single scratch on you that indicated you "crashed your bike to his vehicle" (Callahan cleaned up your choice of wording a bit). But it was amusing to see Callahan dragging you along in handcuffs, who appeared all too joyful with a shit-eating smile as if you just won the lottery. Meanwhile, Callahan's cheeks were flaming hot and his voice adopted to a nervous high pitch as he lied to everyone who were just barely containing their laughter.

It also wasn't long before you decided to settle into Hawkins in some shitty trailer park, but you couldn't really complain considering your drifting years weren't all sunshine and rainbows either.

Besides, Callahan made it all worth it.

It wasn't love at first sight, but there was absolutely attraction. Hell, you were practically (if not literally) throwing yourself at him during your first encounter, and after that it would be the same--if not more intense.

You were no stranger to trouble, but often times you would seek for trouble yourself on purpose just so you could wind up in the police station to bother--ahem, I mean, very persistently try to hang out with Callahan. Or you'd just go to the station despite having no business there, but Flo the secretary usually kicked you out before you had the chance to even lay eyes on the gorgeous four eyes.

Today, however, Flo wasn't there. You didn't believe in some higher power, but it was a fucking miracle that you were grateful for and didn't dare to question. And so you more than happily made yourself at home in the station, sitting down at Callahan's desk as you curiously pried into his stuff before a deep laugh from behind you broke you out of your little reverie.

"This is just ridiculous now, Y/N." Hopper shot you an incredulous though very much amused expression. "If you like Callahan so much--which I have no fucking idea why--then just ask him out on a date already."

It was no secret that Hopper can be a total grump, but oddly enough you became fast friends with him. He never gave you a hard time and you never bullshitted him, which in turn formed a weird sort of respect between the two of you.

You rolled your eyes at the huge man, turning back to Callahan's desk and inspecting his assortment of pens--which you thought was way too much and he probably doesn't even use all of them, but that only amped up his dorkish charm to you by, like, a thousand.

"You're one to talk, Hop." You scoffed, snatching a pen and beginning to click it continuously. "I bet your hand's tired from jerking off to Joyce Byers."

Hopper scowled, but a faint rosiness dusted his cheeks. "Okay, first off--" Click. "I do not jerk off to Joyce--" Click. "and unlike you--" Click. "I actually have the balls to ask her out--" Click. "she just hasn't--" Click. "WILL YOU STOP FUCKING CLICKING THAT GODDAMN PEN?!"

You didn't even flinch, casually stashing the pen away in your pocket before you stood and faced him. "Enough about you." You huffed, crossing your arms as your eyes levelled with his. Hopper may as well be a living brick wall walking around ready to punch whoever crossed him, but you were never intimidated by the chief of police whom you've admittedly grown a soft spot for. "Callahan on for patrol duty tonight?"

"Yeah, and you owe me big time." He frowned when you blatantly ignored him, but what was new? "I need as much manpower as I can get to investigate what the hell's going on with the pumpkin patches yet here I am, like a fucking idiot, helping to set you and Callahan up."

"You looove me~" You teased, patting his shoulder and granting him a Cheshire Cat-like grin. "This is all for a good cause, big guy. And just think, the sooner Callahan and I get together, the faster I'll be outta your hair!" You chuckled. "And hey, you're thinking too much into those pumpkin patches. Probably just some pumpkin farmers having a pumpkin war. Go big or gourd home, am I right?"

Hopper watched as you laughed obnoxiously loud at your stupid pun, looking so proud of yourself as little snorts wracked your smaller frame and your shoulders shook from sheer glee. He shook his head, sighing heavily to himself.

"God, I actually feel kinda bad for Callahan..."

•••♡•••

Night couldn't fall any quicker, but once it finally did your entire body was practically bursting with excitement like a child who's about to go out for trick or treating.

You hopped onto your bike, revving up the engine and driving even more maniacally than your Munson neighbour did out of the trailer park. You didn't even keep track anymore of how fast you were going, your hair flying as you raced down the road and were greeted by Halloween decorations strewn about in various houses' lawns.

A few minutes later, you found yourself on the empty road leading out of Hawkins. And just as you predicted--had hoped--the shrill blare of a siren sliced through the air and the all too familiar red and blue lights nearly blinded your vision as a police cruiser followed close on your tail.

You couldn't suppress the giddy grin that tore across your face, slowing down by the side of the road and the car pulling up next to you.

The butterflies in your stomach were doing fucking somersaults now as you heard the car door open and shut close, boots thudding on the ground as your favourite officer approached.

"Well, well, well... Lookie who we have here~?" The singsong voice made your grin widen even more if it was possible, making your cheeks hurt. The beam from a flashlight hit your eyes, and once your sight adjusted there was none other than Callahan, staring down at you with his pretty brown eyes. "If it isn't Lil Miss Trouble."

"Cally!" You giggled like some lovesick schoolgirl, and if we were being honest, you pretty much acted like you are. "Fancy seeing you here~ Halloween ain't 'til tomorrow, so why are ya out on patrol?"

"Beats me." He shrugged. "The chief suddenly put me on duty. Also, you know how much I hate that nickname." He grimaced, turning the flashlight off. It was quite dark, but you could still see him well enough due to a lone street lamp a couple feet away. "Get off."

His sudden commanding tone sent a shiver down your spine, a certain part of you getting wet. And it didn't help that you decided to forgo panties, your slick coating the seat of your bike. You then jumped off, your breasts bouncing slightly. This action didn't go unnoticed by him, his eyes dropping to your chest and trailing down your figure until his gaze landed on your skirt--if it could even be called that.

You were wearing a leather mini skirt that left little to the imagination, hugging your curves just right and showing off your thighs. He thought that if you made one wrong move, you'd flash him your panties; of course, not knowing you weren't even wearing any.

"Did I ever tell you how much I love your moustache?" You purred, heart leaping when he went speechless and his mouth hung agape.

His eyes flicked back up to meet yours, snapping out of his trance. "Only the first hundred times." He then cleared his throat, pointing an accusatory finger at you with a hand placed on his hip like a parent scolding their child. "Flattery won't work on me, Y/N. Do you know how fast you were going? And why weren't you wearing a helmet?"

"I know I was going pretty fucking fast!" You guffawed. "As for not wearing a helmet, well, what can I say? I don't like feeling restricted. I like being free. If I could, I'd totally go naked."

You saw his Adam's apple bob as he gulped at your emphasis of "naked", a death grip on his flashlight as his jaw squared. "That's public indecency." He stated simply. He was getting better dealing with you, but the ever so slight crack in his voice was a telltale sign that you still very much had an intoxicating, beguiling effect on him. "And where the hell were you going? Were you...leaving Hawkins?"

You didn't miss the plaintive way he had asked the question, your heart melting. He cared for you. No matter how much trouble you caused everyone, caused him... He would still check up on you, and you even caught him several times keeping watch outside of your trailer when Will Byers went missing a year ago. He claimed that the police were patrolling every nook and cranny after the kid's disappearance, but you never saw Hopper or anyone else guarding other people's homes like how Callahan did yours.

"I'm not leaving, Phil." You breathed out, nothing more than a whisper as you looked up at him; serious, for once. Because as boring as this town was, you've grown fond of it. And Callahan played a big part in that and even if you weren't together, he was the closest to home that you've ever felt in a long fucking time.

He searched your face for any lies, brown eyes soft before a genuine smile graced his features. "You better not, Lil Miss Trouble." A beat passed between the two of you, breaths mingling together and you only just realized how close you both were standing to each other. He had you caged against your bike, and you had to strain your neck just to be eye level with the tall man.

Then something in his expression shifted, and soon he was drawing away from you. "W-Well, I'm gonna let you off with a warning. Just this once, though! Think of it as thanks for that time--" You cut off his rambling when you reached out, grabbing his hand.

"I didn't leave." You declared, an almost pleading tone in your voice. "So don't leave either, Phil."

For what felt like a dreadful eternity, you were swallowed by a deafening silence. You, who was usually so confident, found your will breaking with each passing second. Your grasp softened until you let go, feeling your heart sink to your stomach.

"...Forget it. Thanks, Cal--" But you couldn't finish; because in a blink of an eye, his lips were on yours. It was brief, feather light. But the chaste peck made your heart explode, and you didn't even question if this was just one of your silly fantasies. It felt too real--too good.

He slowly pulled away, resting his forehead against yours and his warm breath tickling your nose. "I'm not leaving." He murmured, such beautiful, sincere greenish brown eyes locking with yours. "I'm not leaving you, Y/N."

You felt tears prickle your eyes, but before you would ever allow them to fall you wrapped your arms around his neck and nuzzled your nose with his. "Then prove it." And you crashed your lips with his, this time fiercely, passionately. You felt the rough brush of his moustache, but that only made everything feel astoundingly better.

He finally closed the gap between you two, looming over you, the flashlight clattering to the ground as his much larger hands clutched on to your hips before he easily lifted you and plopped you down on your bike's seat. You wrapped your legs around his waist, nipping on his bottom lip that elicited a gasp from him which you gladly took as the opportunity to slide your tongue inside his mouth. His tongue tangled with yours and coaxed it into a sensual dance, earning him a most heavenly moan from you.

You two only pulled away for breath, a thin string of saliva connecting your tongues. But his glasses were foggy and tinkly laughter bubbled out of you, feeling like a druggie high off of life--high off of him.

He chuckled, taking his glasses off to wipe them before putting them back on. "Sorry." He smiled sheepishly. "That ruined the moment, didn't it?"

"On the contrary..." You were still laughing, but you held one of his hands still on your hip and guided it lower, lower, lower...until his palm was right on your bare pussy. "You always turn me on, Cal. It's pretty fucking ridiculous, honestly."

His breath hitched sharply when he felt how drenched you were, his pupils dilating and mouth forming an 'O' at the realization that you've been half naked this whole time. He pressed his palm closer to your core, your laughter instantly dying down as his thumb slowly rubbed circles around your clit. One of your hands flew to his hair, something you've always dreamt of doing ever since you saw the incredibly sexy messy state it was in the day you met him. Your other hand clung onto his shirt for dear life, a gasp escaping you as he pinched your nub and began to stroke his fingers along your slit.

He leaned down to your ear, his fingers gradually increasing their pace and you trembled from the pure ecstasy that overcame your senses just from his deft fingers. "You really are a little troublemaker, huh?" He chuckled, voice dropping an octave lower. "You planned this all along, didn't you? Fucking slut..." His lips dragged down your ear to the crook of your neck, biting down and leaving a mark that had you crying out. "My beautiful fucking slut."

"All yours, Officer~" You mewled, your hand latched onto his shirt making its descent to his crotch. You palmed him, feeling his prominent erection aching to spring free as he groaned. "Just be mine, too." You peered down at him, eyes hazy with desire and desperation. "Pretty please?"

"I think I've been yours ever since we met. Not like I had a choice on the matter, anyway." He snickered before capturing your lips once more in a sultry, intimate kiss. Your mouth moved in perfect tandem with his, but you both took your sweet time as everything else faded away. There was only you and Callahan, Callahan and you. And it's all you ever fucking wanted; all you needed.

Not breaking the kiss, you shucked your leather jacket off and carelessly tossed it to the ground. Your hands came up to cup the sides of his face, fingers caressing him tenderly while his hands crawled beneath your white tank top; imagine his pleasant surprise to discover that you didn't wear a bra either.

"Jesus..." He muttered, yanking your tank top up before kneading and squeezing your perfect breasts as his lascivious gaze met your own. "You're gonna kill a fucking cop here." He grunted, making you giggle which immediately turned into an elated whimper as he tweaked your pert nipples.

"Get down. Turn around. Ass up." He ordered, and you didn't at all hesitate to obey. In your haste, you nearly tumbled off of your bike though Callahan steadied you. "Eager, are we, Y/N?" He chuckled, but something about the way your name smoothly, seductively rolled off his tongue had you wanting to fall down on your knees and reverently suck him off instead. But you didn't dare disobey, spinning around with your back to him and bending over your bike.

Though something dropped to the ground as you bent over, making Callahan arch a brow as he picked it up.

"My pen?" He scoffed, and though you can't see him, you can feel his disapproving stare boring into the back of your head like daggers. "Naughty girl, now you're stealing? Tsk, tsk." He flipped up your skirt, your ass now in full view as he licked his lips. His hands groped the pillowy soft flesh, releasing a low whistle of appreciation as he squeezed before suddenly raising his hand and spanking you.

"Ah..!" You exclaimed, looking over your shoulder with glazed eyes and flushed cheeks. "M'sorry, Officer~"

Smack! Another slap had you reeling in the best way possible, your pussy clenching at--unfortunately--nothing as you whimpered.

"Uh-uh. Didn't say you could look at me, did I, naughty girl?" He chided, seeing that you were wiggling your ass and trying to inch closer to him.

Smack! Smack! Smack! Three slaps, one right after the other. Your flesh glowed red with his handprint, making him smirk devilishly.

"M'sorry..." You said again, your voice coming out as a meek squeak. But more. You wanted more, more, more. "I'm a good girl, I promise!"

"I'm sure you are~" He hummed leisurely. "Just gotta prove it to me, right, baby?"

Before you had any chance to reply, he prodded your legs apart with his knee and his pants unzipping sounded like the most divine music to your ears. Both of your breaths got caught in your throats as the tip of his cock pressed against your pussy, stroking up and down your entrance slowly, teasingly. Your lustful impatience getting the best of you because, fuck, you deserved this, you were just about to slide down onto him when he suddenly pushed his entire cock in with no warning.

And fuck he was big. Much bigger than you ever fantasized, completely stretching you out as a long moan was drawn out of you and your upper body fell like a ragdoll on your bike. You vaguely heard him laughing huskily before he started to move; carefully, as if he was afraid you might break.

But with you? That didn't last very long, any pathetic thread of patience he had snapping as soon his thrusts started to become rapid, hard, wild--hitting that amazing spot deep inside your gummy walls over and over again, the lewd squelches of his cock slipping in and out of your pussy perfectly harmonizing with skin slapping against skin.

"Fuck, fuck, fuuuck..!" You screamed, toes curling and grinding your ass in time with his thrusts as he watched, utterly transfixed, with how you seemed to just fit him like a puzzle piece; the fucking addicting way you slammed back down onto him, your skin rolling with each bounce, your pussy clenching his cock like a goddamn vice and effortlessly accepting all of him.

He then wrapped a hand around your neck, squeezing just enough to have your eyes rolling to the back of your head before pulling you up so that you were standing and your back was pressed against his chest. He nuzzled his face just beneath your ear, hot pants grazing your skin as he never seized his pleasurable assault to your cunt as he continued to pound relentlessly into you like a beast in heat.

Suddenly, he pressed his pen to your clit. Your eyes widened as you felt the long, thin object rubbing against your sensitive mound, stroking and poking at your folds as his cock drove in and out, in and out.

"Gonna cum for me, pretty girl?" He whispered, planting butterfly kisses along the delicate column between your neck and shoulder, his grip on your neck tightening ever so slightly as he humped against you.

"Y-Yes, fuck, yes Officer..!" You choked out, rocking your hips desperately as you could almost see stars.

"Then cum, Y/N."

And you did; your walls fluttered and clamped down on his dick, your body stilling and eyes crossing as waves of the highest rapture coursed throughout your body. Callahan soon followed, a nearly animalistic groan accompanying the spurts of cum that gushed into your deepest, most intimate part as his hips stuttered to a halt.

You basked in silence, revelling in the satisfying afterglow. Then, agonizingly slowly, his twitching cock slid out of you, making you convulse and you could feel the hot cum trickling down your legs. He spun you around and gently grabbed your chin, tipping it up and examining your completely fucked out expression. You stuck your tongue out, and he didn't waste a precious moment as he leaned down and entwined your tongue with his. He held you closely, securely; hugging you to his broad chest as he stepped backwards until his back bumped into his car to support the both of you.

You were the first to pull away from the sloppy liplock, laying your head on his chest and sighing deeply. "That was..." You looked up at him, blinking dazedly. "...not what I expected."

"Did you not have fun?" He chuckled, though there was a hint of worry in his voice as his thumb lazily caressed your swollen bottom lip, kind brown eyes seeking yours. Shit, did he overdo it? Or worse... Did you realize that you actually weren't that into him?

"I did, it's just..." You trailed off before a giggle erupted out of you, shaking your head. "Y'know, the first time we met, I actually thought of you bending me over your car and fucking me. I never imagined I'd be bent over my bike."

"For fuck's sake, Y/N, you really are gonna be the death of me!" He whined dramatically, making you laugh and soon he joined you.

"So..." You grinned, fixing his glasses that had fallen to the bridge of his nose and running a hand through his sweaty, unruly curls that you loved too fucking much. "Was I a good girl, Cally~?"

"The fucking best." He returned your euphoric grin, booping your nose and, though he'd never admit it, he actually liked your nickname. Just for him, only by you. "Buuut you're a good girl that's coming back to the station with me."

"Huh? But I thought you're gonna let me off the hook for speeding?" You questioned, confused.

"I am, but you're forgetting your other crimes." He cleared his throat, rising to his full height and looming over you yet again. "Public indecency..." He traced his pen on your pussy, making you shudder as the cold metal glided across your skin up to the valley between your breasts. "...and theft."

"Well, Officer, if that's the case then you're not innocent either~" You smirked, wrapping your arms around his neck and dangling off of him much like you did the first time. "You stole my heart, after all~"

His face was as red as a tomato, smiling like a doofus as he hooked his hands under your plush thighs, hoisting you up and wrapping your legs around his waist. Taking you by surprise, but definitely not unwelcomed as he stared up at you with a stupidly smitten expression.

"We're partners in crime, then, Lil Miss Trouble~"

[suspendingtime]

20 Questions for Fic Writers!

I've been tagged by @stars-of-kyber and @andthebubbles. 😁 So although I feel barely qualified, I guess I best do this...

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

7. 🤗

I started about 2 months ago, so... and yes, they're all Kanthony. Initially just started as a way of contributing to Anthony Week 2023, and I didn't even expect that I'd actually do all 7 days.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

13,370.

Currently ranging at 661 to 3,779 per fic. Rookie numbers!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

So far, just my beloved Bridgerton.

But there have been a couple other shows that have tempted me...

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Astride  - 166

Nursery  - 118

Hunt - 105

Yours - 94

Temptation - 88

Having published a handful with various ratings, it's quite interesting to see the kudos, bookmarks (private vs public), and subs ratios! Much to think about.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes.

Why... I sort of have a need? Idk, when I see a comment it's hard to just leave it hanging there and not to reply. Like irl if someone looked at something I made and verbally commented on it... and I just stared back blankly not saying anything. 😐 This is how it feels to me on the receiving end at least haha. And my replies saying various forms of 'Thank you!' is probably quite repetitive, but hey ho.

Plus comments give you that lil hit of dopamine; from both povs as a writer or reader. Being on the reader side for most of my Ao3 activities I tend to comment on most of fics I read, I can't help it - I must tell you what I loved about it and why, and there's a pleasure in reciprocating that back too. Look, now I've written half an essay on the subject, gaaah. (I've not been on Ao3 as much as I'd like to recently, and because I opened it to scoop out the stats for some of the questions above I can now see that I have some unreads... and the need is happening.)

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm *thinking really hard*, I don't think any of them have an ending that is all that angsty. If I had to choose, maybe Temptation?

The pattern I've shown so far in my posted works is that it's gonna be 90% fluff. Though that is liable to change. 😆

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Nursery?

I'm not sure, cause they've all ended on a pretty optimistic note so far. But that one has Kate and Anthony with a few of their kids, so it's the furthest on the Kanthony HEA timeline.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet...

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Ummm 👀 I may have dabbled in some smut.

What kind... hm, the kind where both people are panting for each other, and end up caving because they literally can't hold their horniness in anymore (this totally explains why I went feral for Bridgerton S2, ha). Another pattern I seem to have is making Anthony a submissive man puddle.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet, but I do have some crack ideas I may explore.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, I very much doubt it.

How often does this happen to people?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I'd certainly be all for it if anyone ever wanted to translate any works of mine. 😊

If I was proficient enough to write in other languages, then I would probably try publishing the different versions from the get go.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Kinda?

Nothing formal, but there was a lengthy comment thread on Reddit some months ago where myself and another user went back and forth re-writing the script for that stormy library scene 😅 (not so much re-writing what was already there, bar the last few lines, more of a continuation in a universe where Kate hadn't fled).

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Must I even answer this? Kanthony, c'mon now.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

There's only 1 work that I have, where I've actually started a chapter 2. And I have all the faith that I will finish it. ✍️🤓

Other potential WIPs, that are currently just posted as one shots, only exist in my head... who knows if they will see the light of day.

16. What are your writing strengths?

This question feels illegal to be asked.

I have no idea, I'm very new to this whole writing thing. At least in terms of fiction, so I'm not sure what I'd consider my strengths to be. I feel like I need some more practice before I can get a real sense of this?

I would say that dialogue usually comes very quickly to me, and it's having to fill in the bits around it that takes more brain muscles. So that might indicate something.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Everything apart from the answer to the question above.

But really I think it's remembering that there is a world outside of the main couple happening, and trying to describe the details there. Also other general 'setting the scene' stuff like clothing, weather etc etc. I usually just want to jump straight in with some random dialogue.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

On writing it... no thoughts; not done it yet!

If I needed to for some unknown fic reason in the future, I'm sure I'll be apologising profusely in the author notes for trusting Google translate and probably butchering whatever language it is.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Still just the one so far, Bridgerton. 😌

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Hunt 🥺🥹 I was a lot of feels, and just very indulgent tbh.

I also really enjoyed my shortest one, Obedient, which was in 2nd person (hadn't done that before). The writing of that one was just really fun and I idky but I've reread it quite a bit!

__________________________________________________

I'm woefully looking at my Ao3 bookmarks (which has grown exponentially since joining Tumblr), full of things that I've not got round to reading yet. So I'm tagging partly based on stuff hanging out on top of that pile: @islemeadow, @ladykettlechips, @hydriotaphia, @eleanor-bradstreet, and the smut aunties @colettebronte & @fayes-fics 😋 (if y'all wanna do it, ofc. I tried to find those who hadn't been tagged/done it yet, sorry if you've actually already done this and I've just not found it).

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

Alright I want to talk about piracy, gender, and babygirlification in here on this day. I don't know if metas are a thing you title but this one is called "babygirl, that pirate is gnc as fuck."

I want to be up front here. I've seen some people talk about us feminizing these pirates and saying "hey maybe don't do that" in ways I agree with the sentiment of but disagree with on their conclusions. So to lend credence to the parts of those arguments I agree with I'm gonna say up front that Ed's hair isn't the thing that makes me go "oh he's serving femboy" while is hair is gorgeous, it's not considered feminine in Maori culture to have long hair so it is not contributing to my reading of "ways Ed goes hard with his gender presentation" that's the part I agree on. However I don't think that means he's not giving gender because oh baby let's get into it.

I want to preface all of this with this. Ed's costume is delightfully anachronistic. He is dressed like Mad Max. He's giving biker he's giving leather daddy. So when I talk about the gender presentation implied by spacific costume pieces I'm analyzing it from a modern perspective because how am I gonna hold mad Max leather daddy to 1700s standards of masculinity and femininity. Now with that disclaimer out of the way let's start with perhaps the most talked about and simultaneously least acknowledged one

He's wearing a whole ass crop top. They didn't have to do that. Mad Max, the major costuming influence for Ed's look has the divide between his shirt and his pants down a bit from where Ed's is. me and the other girlboys and gender anarchists all know that a hairy man in a crop top is the ultimate serve. And while his tummy is thirsted after I don't think it gets the credit it deserves for being a gender moment. I blame the high waisted pants for that, because if you can't see tummy you are likely to forget it's a crop top.

The next hint over the course of the show we get that his gender expression might be complex and varied and for the queers is this

I'll get to the suits when I talk about Stede, but here we have a man with flowers in his hair and bows in his beard. What he has done here is again very androgynous. Usually when we think of androgyny we think of something that is neither masculine nor feminine. My man Jeff has gone the opposite direction with the beard bows. Because beards are very masculine (there are women with beards of course but as a cultural signifier beard screams man) and he has put these dainty feminine little bows in it. It's giving like 1700s glitter beard in that it's something we consider very masculine decorated in a way that is very feminine. And it's elevated by those fuckin hair flowers which match his shoes. It's a whole look.

Then we get another wonderful anachronism. It's blink and you miss it but

The fuckin nail polish. He's wearing nail polish, and not even nail polish in a color where you can go "well he's goth" lord no. It's pink and sparkly.

Next one: the Kraken

Now I know what you're thinking, "But Jamie, this look is the sad boy look. This look is the look where he's trying to hide his vulnerability, and, subtextually, his femininity from Izzy." And let me tell you, you're so right and as a trans man this look is something that can be so fucking personal to me. The man is undergoing beard dysphoria and he's dealing with it how I dealt with it when I was 16 and some of my cis male classmates started coming to school with lil teenager mustaches. I know that's like the opposite of a feminine thing but it is part of the complex gender fuckery we see on this character. He got told you're not enough of a man pirate and he ran and threw on FAKE BEARD? that's that on me knowing this mother fucker to be trans. On top of feeding us with that trans masc experience he gives us the MCR eyeshadow? The look is undeniably trans. And that's not even getting into the dangly earring. Granted the earring could go either way pirates are often depicted with earrings.

I suppose this isn't really a meta so much as me gushing about minor costuming decisions and how Ed is a GNC icon

[suchagallabitch]

🫵weekly wednesday tag 🫵

omg I (simple old me?) have been bestowed upon the honour of coming up with these questions??? i would like to thank the academy for this most sacred honour 😋

1. if you could switch bodies with anybody for only one hour who would it be and what would you do? I think I gotta say taylor swift OBVI. first off im gonna dropping ME! acoustic version. Then I’m gonna hope lover deluxe is already recorded, drop that. If not i will make sure to text Jack and tell him that we need to record it so that i get it either way 😼. Then I would find out the definite truth of what happened between her and Karlie Kloss. I’d wire myself (as in me- me) a few million dollars, pet the cats and then post something really random on her instagram story. Literally want to make the public go absolutely bananas trying to figure out why taylor posted a random twitter meme. I have a lot of faith to believe this could all happen in an hour but I would try. SO hard.

2. whats your most trivial / dumbest hot take?I don’t think we should still be discovering animals. like what do you mean in the year of our lord 2023 we are STILL finding animals?? no they should all be discovered and if they havent been then i think they should stay undiscovered.

3. if you had to teach a college course what would it be in? I feel like we’re all expecting me to say something Taylor related but honestly I could teach a masterclass on the psychology of Ryan Murphy. I hate that man and i have so much to say about him and his productions

4. season 12 of shameless is suddenly happen and youve been put in charge! what plot point(s) are you gonna make happen? I cant think of anything substantial to actually contribute but i want Carl Gallagher to have a fruity little vape. I also want to see him quit the force and flourish in a new job!

5. who would be your godly parent? (can be any mythology). I’m gonna go with greeks as a Percy Jackson stan. I asked my bsf who is an expert in greek mythology. She said: “you’re a Aphrodite child cuz you’re a hopeless romantic and you appreciate beauty. You’re very particular in how you’re viewed and how everything you produce is viewed (what you write, how your feed looks like, etc.)” - I’m gonna have to agree with her on Aphrodite

6. what’s something you love about yourself? I think i’m so very very funny

7. describe your day in 5 emojis: 😴👁️👩‍💻✈️☕️

8. what shameless character do you think you could beat in a fight? Realistically i think the ONLY person i could beat in a fight is Liam and honest to god im not even sure i could.

9. tell us 2 truths and a lie, we’ll try to guess the lie!

- I’m double jointed

- I sleep on the left side of the bed

- I’ve never had pumpkin pie

10. do you have a pet(s). if so how did they get their name? I do! my son (cat) is named Chidi after the good place!

11. show us a meme (or picture) that captures your essence

self explanatory.

12. whats your typical coffee / tea / beverage order? see i gotta have a special lil drinky drink everyday and i mean my little drinky drinks are free so i am likw 80% gingerbread chai at any given time. Alternatively, an iced chestnut praline latte w/ praline cold foam.

13. use a song to describe the last 5 years of your life?

2019- its nice to have a friend- taylor swift

2020- ribs - lorde

2021- nothing new - taylor swift

2022- first love / late spring- mitski OR orlando- leith ross

2023- true blue - boygenuis OR now that we don’t talk - taylor swift.

Thank you friends thats all i got :)

I Tag: @deedala @darlingian @michellemisfit @mybrainismelted @too-schoolforcool @gallawitchxx @gardenerian @sam-loves-seb @thisdivorce @xninetiestrendx @scarcrosseduntouched @juliakayyy @y0itsbri @grumble-fish @grumpymickmilk @transmickey @surviving-maybe @metalheadmickey @heymrspatel @auds-and-evens @deathclassic @flamingbluepanda @crossmydna @sleepyfacetoughguy @vintagelacerosette @depressedstressedlemonzest @thepupperino @squidyyy23 @energievie 🫶🫶

[alun1r]

Rare Alu Rant About Fandoms bc I never say shit:

Sue me, but getting into a fandom just for the intention of becoming popular is so weird to me.

Like sure you want a lot of people to see what you make. Because making something for the fandom should be seen! That’s dope as hell.

But you’re gonna lose inspiration real fast when you find out content creation takes a lotta work but more often than not comes with little reward.

I hold firmly the belief that Fandom is for making content for the pure reason of just because you can.

✨the joy of free will to bring your delusions to life so others can indulge in their delusions as well✨ Kinda vibes? Yanno?

I never started making HL content with the idea in mind that I’d reach 9k followers on tiktok. And I ain’t gonna lie it’s daunting for me. Specially as someone whose always just made shit for whatever reason without even posting it. But The videos that got me views and followers on tiktok, were made because I was high and wanted to laugh. And I’d figured “what the hell, this made me laugh….Maybe it will make someone else laugh.” And I’m glad it did.

And now I float around just making stuff. I still make whatever I want tbh. I do my best to give credit where credit is due in what I make. And yeah I’ve done some fan service videos and writing here and there because hey it’s fun for me.

I see so many posts or peoples bios saying that they’re working towards being popular in fandom and then their posts are what other people said or made on Twitter or tiktok or Vice versa and there’s often times there’s no real credit to original creators.

Don’t get me wrong, if it’s properly credited, AWESOME. Usually it’s not though, and that’s just wild to me. Because how are you expecting to get popular under your own name when you’re just reposting stuff.

That doesn’t make you a content creator.

A historical collector guess?? Because you’re like idk collecting all the stuff people made and what not onto a new page.

Idk dude. I just miss authenticity I guess. People making stuff and just being excited to show it.

Don’t get me wrong though it’s not all terrible on here and everywhere on the internet for fandoms. I’ve made close friends with other creators who feel and see fandom much the same. Just here to vibe and escape.

I’m not saying I don’t think views and followers and likes and notes or what have you, matter. I know they do. I get a lil confidence boost when something I make pops off. I feel proud.

But man it’s the intention of “ Im trying to be a popular creator” that rubs me the wrong way. Make stuff because you like it. Not because other people will. Doing whatever to get you likes wont bring the same satisfaction. And in more cases than not I see it backfiring and causing drama because, like I said it’s usually shit that’s copied or reposted.

Who knows maybe I’m just old and don’t understand bc I also see fandom and the work I’ve contributed as something I wouldn’t like boast about in real life. Because the reaction wouldn’t be positive. Like just for enjoying Hogwarts legacy I get teased in my daily life from acquaintances. It’s not totally negative. Buts it’s enough for me to know that YEAH 9k followers on tiktok don’t mean anything in the real world LMAO because at the end of the day, offline, I am still just a nerd whose daydreaming in her bedroom to escape reality.

I’m 24 dude. And I work in news. Shit is exhausting. Read a headline and you’ll see what I mean. And I just wanted to rant about it because it’s been bugging me since I joined fandom again last year.

But due to, idk my follower count and whatnot I always felt like I can’t or rather I shouldn’t speak my mind so much for fear of SOMEONE coming for me for something. And man I hate that feeling bc this bitch has opinions and I dislike the idea of feeling like others have control over it. But tbh eh. I wanted to rant. Just speaking into the void of the internet.

If you decide to send anon hate for my opinionated rant be ready for a meme bc I don’t have the mental capacity to take anything other than my IRL life responsibilities seriously lmao.

[amerricanartwork]

9. and 20. please.

Also love the new lil scugsona. Very fitting for you.

@scavworld's Rain World Questionnaire

Thanks for the ask! Just a quick note, that little character was actually meant to be a scug-ified version of my regular avatar, which I should probably make a ref for soon. I've always just liked the idea that it can "transform" into a different creature to match whatever fandom I'm dealing with, so I thought I'd portray it as a slugcat in this case!

Anyway though, onto the actual questions...

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

9. What are your opinions on Five Pebbles (character)?

Ohhh, now that's a very interesting matter! I really like characters like him because they're so fascinating to me! For now I will disregard the fantastical element of him being a massive supercomputer, because even though in-and-of-itself I think that's such a unique concept even in fiction, especially after I realized that Five Pebbles and Looks to the Moon really are the core of not just the "story" of Rain World but even the in-game environment itself, I imagine I'll have another chance to touch up on this so I'll save my longer thoughts on that for later.

That being said, I'll start by saying I love thinking about characters from a psychological perspective, trying to figure out why they are the way they are, why they do what they do, what they really want vs. what they think they want, how they really perceive themselves vs. how they present themselves publicly, etc. Characters like Five Pebbles are always an especially interesting choice for this kind of pondering, because, as flawed as they may be, so much of the situation around them also contributed to their downfall that I refuse to let everyone else off the hook too. And since I also don't believe anyone is inherently a "bad" person, it's really fun to ponder just how these characters go from being alright people to doing such terrible things and meeting such tragic ends.

To put it shortly, Five Pebbles (and other characters like him) is in my interpretation a great example of karma in the more real-life meaning, and the "you attract more of what you think about the most" idea. Five Pebbles always seemed to feel trapped by and at arms with his surroundings, from the great opposition to his very existence from the True Anointed Citadel, to him literally being physically stuck to Looks to the Moon, to the fear of opposition he must have had as a Sliverist, to him being stuck dealing with the rot, and finally with his collapse, left as a tiny fraction of himself buried in the cold, lifeless remains of his superstructure, with truly no way out on his own. Because he was so focused on escaping the perceived confines around him, all he did, albeit unknowingly, was end up finding more nets to get trapped in.

And again, while I think everyone around him did contribute to his awful end in some way, stories like these are still pretty sad to me because, in the end, I think these characters themselves need to learn to change their thinking, yet all the harshness they face can so easily lead them to create a vicious cycle. Five Pebbles isn't the first character I've enjoyed strongly whose story seemed to play out this way, and as sad as it is, it's also very intriguing.

And besides, it opens up plenty of potential for redemption arc AU stories—!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

20. What is something you think the game could improve on?

The short answer: incentive.

The long answer: Let me start off by saying Rain World, to me, is fascinating largely as more of an art project than a normal video game. It's amazing how a relatively simple concept of a small animal in an urban environment they can't understand morphed into something so vast and extensive, combining nature with technology, science with religion, sci-fi with fantasy, and dunking it all in a super unique aesthetic that fuses urban street style with fancy ancient artwork, it's amazing!

BUT so much of this is lost to players because the game does, in my opinion, a pretty bad job of conveying it all. It's very confusing , especially to new players, and the only means of discovering the greater context of the story, besides just hearing it from other players/fans, is if not downright frustrating at least very tedious. And that's just getting the story itself. I think most people who have played this game haven't even made it that far, because the gameplay alone is so difficult the first time playing that if you aren't captivated by the mystery factor of the environment (or like me and also stubbornly dedicated to getting the bragging rights of having beat such a difficult game), you're too busy just trying to not die every other cycle to bother really exploring and ferrying the pearls to Moon, much less making sense of what you uncover.

I think the blank stare of the slugcats looking up at Five Pebbles perfectly encapsulates what I'm getting at here. You've got this absolutely fascinating story about a mechanical god who flew too close to the sun in a desperate attempt to escape the confines of his life, meanwhile the little slugcat is just all "...'kay", because what does this little animal care about the crazy religious hubris of some long-gone existence-hating people and their sad crumbling calculator robots when all it wants its is to just find more food and not get eaten again?

For a bit of devil's advocate, I will say that I think the difficulty of just playing the game and then figuring out its story, first of all is pretty "realistic" from the perspective of simulating a real-life ecosystem and having an animal discover complex lore in a way that they'd be physically capable of, but secondly has led the Rain World fandom to be really tight-knit compared to other fandoms I've seen. It seems like everyone I've come across is at least in the process of playing through all the campaigns, if not having already completed them and established some level of their own interpretation of the story, because they are all genuinely interested in the game, its characters, world, story, and themes enough to persevere through all the struggles of gameplay and lore confusion to enjoy it. However, it's also the same thing that makes this fandom rather small, which is also fine by me; I think there's lots of value in quality niche content!

With all that said though, I can't deny that I think this game isn't very good at getting players geuninely interested in all it has to offer. For evidence, consider how few players have even met Five Pebbles, who is perhaps the most important character in the entire game story-wise (Steam achievements has the "The Journey" Achievement at 12.0% of players as of posting this). Even from my experiences, I didn't even know what "Sliverist" actually meant until a couple weeks ago, and I've been playing this game and involved in the fandom for months at this point!

So yeah. To sumarize, in my opinion, Rain World is a fascinating and very inspiring art project, but most of what it has to offer is lost to most players because it's terrible at giving you a reason to care about it all. Thus, the main thing I think it could improve upon is giving players a reason to care about its worldbuilding and story enough to continue playing.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Well, that was long, but pretty fun! I hope these answers suffice! Keep the questions coming!

[queen-of-obsessing]

i'm extremely uncomfortable with the way judas is being portrayed this season. (lil vent post)

obviously spoilers for all of season 4. and also i haven't seen the season in its entirety yet, this is just based on what my friend has told me and the leaked scenes i've seen. also also this is only talking about show!Judas, as he's being portrayed by the writers, not the bible version, becauseee we know nothing about that one.

i just watched one of the leaked clips from season 4 (because the stupid chosen team hasn't put it on streaming yet), and i'm acc crying rn. like irl. real tears. i'm so choked up, i feel physically ill, and not for any good reasons. this isn't gonna be one of those "oh wow i'm literally sobbing this show is so good 😍" type posts.

i feel sick.

seeing judas just claw and scramble for any sort of positive attention from the disciples around him is sickening. every single time he brings up an idea for how he can positively help the ministry and use his skills (the only way he knows how to coming from a business background), the others just shoot him down. you can see how hard he's trying to win their validation and find some sort of footing within the group and nothing is working.

and zee just compares him to dirty laundry? like to be able to be part of the twelve he has to ditch every single aspect of his life?? THE LIFE THAT PROBABLY SAVED HIM FROM BEING A DESTITUTE ORPHAN. I wouldn't be surprised if Hadad was the one that took him in after his parents died and taught him business skills. It's how he sees the world!!! it's how he was taught to see the world!!

yet no one ever takes any time to see his perspective or give him any chance to meaningfully contribute. he's just this permanent outsider, trying to get in but never ever being fully in. everyone just keeps speaking in cryptic riddles, talking about prophecies and nothing Jesus says makes any sense either, and now even Jesus is rebuking him. judas is probably completely lost and confused by the time we get to episode 8 of season 4.

and it's really uncomfortable to watch.

as someone who grew up in the church, and also saw the world in a very different way from everyone else, I've also experienced what judas is experiencing. desperately clawing for some sort of place in the church AND NOTHING WORKING. I haven't been to church in nearly a year because everytime i tried, i just didn't fit. they didn't want me, i always felt perpetually on the outside of the circle.

on top of that, i'm 99% sure i'm autistic, so like judas, i see the world very logically. i like to have things told in a very straightforward way, and think in very material concepts (for him it's money). But the "Christianese" never made any sense to me. I never understood it. So I spent my days in the church perpetually alone, never fitting in and never fully understanding who I was even supposed to be believing in because nobody took the time to explain it to me in a way I could understand, but vaguely knowing that I wanted to believe in something.

I believe Judas wanted to believe in Jesus, and did believe in Him, but never fully understood why.

...and then he dies. I'm still wondering how the show is going to handle the lead up to his betrayal, but I'm going to assume continually being rejected by the other disciples had something to do with it.

and you know what else is really sick about all this? Jesus fully knowing that Judas was going to betray Him and kill himself. and he just...lets it happen. like he's some sort of sacrificial scapegoat. it makes me so mad??

i could rant about this for hours but yea. i'll just leave this here. Dallas you have so much fking explaining to do. i dread watching this season...

[acknowledge-reigns]

Just something I need to get off my chest real quick. Feel free to skip over. Possible trigger warning ig. The people who claim Roman only is where he is because he has a famous family piss me tf off. You are well within your right to dislike Roman Reigns the character but bringing Joe Anoa'i into it and questioning his character and work ethic is some bullshit. Here's the thing. Yes he's from a famous family but you act like his famous relatives actually got the flowers they deserved. News flash, they didn't. Umaga is yet to be inducted into the Hall of fame, Afa and Sika were forced to portray harmful caricatures portraying Samoans as "wild" and shit while making pocket change to help their families get by, Yokozuna was made to play a Japanese character and Tonga kid a Tongan character because they were told there were "too many Samoans in one promotion", Rikishi was fired from WWE because he couldn't lose weight yet they kept his white counterparts of similar build - and thats just the shit we know about! The Rock was the only one treated even remotely fairly and he's a distant relative. The Anoa'i/Fatu family is literally only just now getting the credit they deserve for their years of blood sweat and tears for the wrestling industry as a whole. Let's also not forget Roman and the Uso's didn't grow up spoiled lil rich boys. They lived in low income apartments, worked at a furniture store to help pay bills etc. Roman grew up with a single mother and four siblings. There was a time when he was homeless and crashing on Jey Uso's couch. The man works his ass off! He beat cancer, came back and continued to kick ass and y'all still won't put no respect on the name Joe Anoa'i? You know what else he was doing durring that time? Visiting children fighting the same illness as him. Going to meetings and facilitating deals for WWE to contribute to various causes for cancer awareness. Even when he took a break durring the pandemic while he had new born twins he clearly was working his ass off and not being some couch potato because he came back muscular af. Y'all try to paint it like he didn't fight through hell to get to the top of the mountain and that's bullshit. He deserves a fucking break if he wants one. He has FIVE children. Y'all act like he's this insane nepotism case, but don't say shit when it's ya favorite little white boys. Y'all just ain't used to seeing POC on top and the bias shows. Do your research before you judge Leati Joseph Anoa'i or even Joshua and Jonathan Fatu for that matter please and thank you.

[princetofbone]

I'm really struggling with my depression right now, so have some lovely tips on how to study while depressed.

don't push yourself overmuch. you're already struggling, so try to make it easy for yourself. When I'm doing well, i study in 50 min incriments. When im not doing well, thats hard as fuck and i hate myself because i can't do it, and then I end up wasting a shit ton of time. Make it easier for yourself by studying for 25 min instead and taking more frequent food, water, and body breaks. If 25 min is too hard, do one problem. doing just a little but now will make future you so much less stressed

have a to-do list that explains each little thing you have to do. I never remember to brush my teeth when im not doin too hot, and making sure that's on my to-do list twice a day means that its something that gets done.

have fun drinks. this goes on all my lists, but especially when you are struggling, any little thing to make your day brighter can help

write compliments to your friends on cards in between problems, then give them to people. It seems dumb, but for me at least, giving people compliments and making people happy makes me feel a lil better.

let yourself break routines and habits if you think it will make you feel better. I know that for some people, it's the only thing keeping them going, but for me, if i let myself do weird things, it can snap me out of the grey because having a beef pie for breakfast is a lil odd, but it makes me happy, and that was what got me through the day yesterday.

Long story short, studying with depression is hard as hell- why should you study when you dont want to have a future and you're tired, and sleep is such a better option. But know that one day it will get better- even if it's just for one day. But isn't that one day of joy worth seeing? Isn't that one day of joy, that one day that might stretch out into days, maybe even weeks of joy, isn't it worth getting to?

What I'm trying to say is that I'm so, so proud of you for being here and trying to study even when its hard, even when you feel like there's not a point, there is, and you are going to make it, you are going to do so well, and I want everyone who sees this to just appreciate their existence for a moment, because every person has value beyond what they can contribute to the world.

[ellraiser]

2023 In Review

2023 is almost at an end, and it’s been a busy ol’ year looking back! Here’s a lil ellraiser/TNgineer wrapped...

Started the year off strong dropping a demo for Rift Breach, an experimental lil dungeon crawler that was fun to make, helped me get better at scoping small, and got my out of my usual pixel art comfort zone!

Then @FletchMakes hosted a 7 day game jam + I couldn’t resist making the "APICO but frogs" I’d always joked about.

Mudborne was born(e) + I was overwhelmed with how much people loved it. It also show me just how much I can get done with a super strict scope and detailed plan

APICO had it’s 1st birthday! From a silly concept made in HTML to now published on all platforms with over 50,000 beekeepers playing - truly never thought it would go anywhere

I’m forever grateful to everyone who’s played and shared this funky bee game

At this point trying to keep up with socials for 3 different games was getting far too much and I needed help - enter @mibyledraws who joined as the first official TNgineer!

Thank you for all your hard work, wonderful videos, and helping me keep on top of everything <3

I released the 2nd free content update for APICO, ‘What Lies Beeneath”, with all sorts of weird and wonderful ocean friends.

It’s been tough to keep working on this mess of a game, but it’s worth it to see how much people have been enjoying all the new content

Decided that I wanted to take the Mudborne concept into a full-game, and started planning out everything along with a new art style and vibe for it (there’s only so far a sprite-rip of APICO can go lmao)

It’s wild to see how far I’ve started to come from tiny rectangle trees!

Towards the end of the year I quit my freelance contract and went full-time gamedev officially, not quite by choice but it was something I wanted to do for a while

I’ll now be able to spend all my time working on the games, as well as all the other little concepts I’ve had bubbling away in the back of my mind...

I moved from GameMaker to LÖVE, built a small framework for future games like Snacktorio + Mudborne, and contributed to the engine itself

Was the first time actually helping making a substantial contribution to an open-source project and I learnt a lot!

After a couple years in and out of development and a last minute engine change to LÖVE, I finally finished and released the demo for Snacktorio.

We’ve had some amazing feedback and it’s been so gratifying to finally get it out and see people enjoy it and confirm it as a fun concept.

Looking ahead to 2024, it’ll be my first year as a full-time gamedev (as well as reaching lvl 30!)

I’m planning to release the final update for APICO, as well as releasing either Mudborne or Snacktorio - might even have to drop some new demos too, as a treat…

Thanks for everyone who has supported me and TNgineers throughout the year.

Whether that was playing the demos, buying the games, sharing your progress, joining the discord, posting wholesome reviews, sending me cute bee pics - I'm truly grateful to you all <3