#but i would love to see what people make out of my ideas..

[woso-dreamzzz]

Injured (Alexia's Version): Future II

Alexia Putellas x Daughter!Reader

Summary: You go to Manuelas

TW: using sex to reinforce ideas of low self-worth, mentions of eating disorder

You didn't come to Manuelas often.

It was a bad idea, drinking in the club Olga owned. All of the workers knew who you were, dragged out on staff dinners and in the background of Olga's video meetings.

There's no way you could get in without someone noticing who you were.

It's not that you were banned. If anything, Mami and Olga would probably prefer it if you did your drinking in the safe walls of Manuelas where the staff would call them if you needed a pick up.

It would be fine if drinking was all that you were doing.

But you don't go to clubs for the drinks. In fact, you don't even really like the taste of alcohol all that much. It was a means to an end, getting you tipsy enough to approach someone in the crowd. But that was only if you weren't approached first.

And you were almost always approached first.

It was easy now, a practiced routine.

You'd go into a club, hang around at the bar for a bit before going onto the dance floor where, no doubt, some older woman would come over and offer to buy you a drink.

It was practiced. It was easy.

It was self destructive.

You knew why you came to these clubs. You knew what you came there for.

You wanted it quick and rough. You wanted to be demeaned and talked down to because it made you feel better that you weren't the only one that saw yourself like that.

Hooking up in club toilets with a woman double your age that couldn't care less about you made you feel better at yourself.

You couldn't do that Manuelas.

Or, you couldn't do that at Manuelas on days when Olga or her close circle were skulking around, which was almost every weekend.

The only reason you were here now was because your usual club wasn't open today and after another day of brutal practice with no end in sight, you needed to feel something.

Even if it was some woman's hand around you as she took you hard and rough and whispered filthy things in your ear.

You should go home, you know. You should go home to your Mami and let her wrap you up in a warm hug and let her tell you that you were worth something and that she loved you.

But you were here.

At Manuelas on a day you knew Olga was at home and her closest staff were busy in a meeting in the back room.

Or, at least, they should be.

Alexia sighs as Olga pulls her in through the open backdoor.

"I am old, amor," She says with a small huff of laughter," My old bones cannot take going to the club anymore."

It's a joke, nothing more than teasing and Olga rolls her eyes.

"Not even my club?"

"Well," Alexia says," If it's your club..."

With Jaume at a youth camp for the week and you staying over at your friend's, the house had been blissfully silent and all too empty.

She and Olga had a nice dinner before growing restless. It didn't suit the family, Alexia thinks, to have the house devoid of her kids.

Olga wasn't due to go in to the meeting at Manuelas but that didn't mean she thought going there was a bad idea which was how Alexia found herself there now, nursing a drink in one hand and holding whatever fruity cocktail Olga had chosen in the other.

Manuelas had come a long way from the pop up club it used to be, now boasting several permanent bases in the country. Alexia was still glad though that one thing stayed the same - namely the fact that she got free drinks.

It certainly payed to be the wife of the owner.

Olga's gone off to greet a few people upstairs, despite denying the fact that this was all a ploy to see how the meeting was going.

Alexia's left downstairs by herself and does what she does best.

People watch.

Manuelas is still exactly like it was when it was first opened, a throng of dancers grinding and making out on the dancefloor.

The same as practically every other lesbian club in the city.

There's nothing unusual about it but Alexia still leans against the bar and surveys the crowd.

There's movement (or rather more movement than normal) to the left of the crowd as a pair breaks out of the dancing.

It's hard to see in the low light but Alexia feels a bolt of lightning shoot down her spine before she's even computed what she's looking at.

You're pressed up against the wall, head tilted to the side as a woman kisses your neck.

You're meant to be at a friend's house. That's what you've told Alexia.

You were going over to a friend's house after practice and you would be staying the night.

But clearly, you're not because you're here.

At Olga's club with a woman that is so clearly not your age whispering filthy things to you.

Alexia's moving towards you without a second thought and you open half lidded eyes to look at her.

You jolt suddenly, straightening up and pushing the woman away from your neck when you notice Alexia there.

She's not meant to be here and you look around wildly because you know if Mami's here then Olga's around here somewhere too.

Your face floods with embarrassment and you leave your partner for the evening.

Even now, Alexia's angry face makes you feel like a little girl again. Like that same little girl who sat in her car seat after another failed football training.

Like the same stupid teenager who starved herself to fit into a shirt that Alexia accidentally bought one size too small.

"Mami..." You say, throat bobbing," I-"

"Are you okay?" Alexia asks you, cupping your face," Are you safe?"

"Mami...I..."

"Bambi," Alexia says, her eyes boring into yours," Talk to me. Are you alright?"

"I..." Your throat bobs and you're right back to that little girl again, the one staring up at Alexia as she grins down at you, that stupid teenager that had once sobbed in her arms after hurting your ankle during practice. "I want to go home, Mami. Please take me home."

Alexia looks into your eyes. You're not drunk, maybe a little tipsy but definitely not drunk. You're not high either. No one's laced anything you've taken.

You're still trembling though and your head falls forward onto Alexia's shoulder, to hide the way tears fall down your cheeks.

You don't know why you're crying. You don't know why you're suddenly so emotional.

You'd set out this evening to hook up with someone, feeling so bad and wrong in your own skin that you needed someone's body pressed up against yours to feel good about yourself again.

You still want that. Just not with a partner.

You want a hug from Mami, curled up next to her in bed at home. You want her to hold you and tell you how much she loves you and how she's never going to let anything bad happen to you.

You're an adult now.

You shouldn't feel this way.

But you're always going to be that little girl that craved love from your Mami.

[hrts4doie]

racer!mark as your boyfriend

warnings: mark x afab!reader, use of pet names (baby, babe), headcanons go gradually from sfw to nsfw (MDNI), possessiveness, car sex, riding, unprotected sex, breeding, praise kink, dirty talk, more car sex

a/n: this is actually a repost LOL i deleted this and forgot about it but anyways my racer!mark brainrot was so bad that i had to make this… i was thinking about making this a series with other members but i’m not too sure! lmk ur thoughts :)

racer!mark who considers you his good luck charm. before every race, he'll come find you and ask for his 'good luck kiss.’ the idea's silly, at least to you, but mark takes it very seriously. he constantly tells you, "babe, without my kiss, i think i might lose. like.. for real."

racer!mark who makes it his personal mission to always do his best for you. every win is for you and you only. a part of him thinks that maybe that's why he made to top of the industry as fast as he did. who could beat him when he has the best motivator?

racer!mark who, although very rarely, sulks every time he loses. you know he's always hard on himself, cursing himself in his head for even the smallest mistakes, and you hate to see the frown on his face when he comes to find you after the race. he always tries to apologize, thinking he disappointed you. you hate that he doesn't realize that no matter what he does, he could never disappoint you.

racer!mark who loves to take you for spontaneous midnight drives when he's not racing. you always complain, telling him, "maaaark, it's late." he'll silence you with a kiss and drag you to the door, assuring it'll be fun. he has a spot, one only for you and him, and he knows you could never say no to him. he's proven right every single time when it's you and him beneath the stars, laughing without a care in the world. at times like these, nothing else matters besides the way mark kisses you, slow and sweet and with so much love that it hurts.

racer!mark who broke his own personal record— which, obviously, was the world record-the day you first told him that you loved him. you came up to him in disbelief after the race, asking, "what.. what was that?" mark could only give you a shy smile, shrugging his shoulders. "i just really love you too," came his silly and ridiculous-yet-very-mark response.

racer!mark who is an absolute nerd about cars. you expected it, but nothing could prepare you for how cute mark is when he rambles. sometimes, you're too distracted to realize what he's actually saying, staring at him with a soft smile while he continues to talk. there's almost nothing better than the way he flushes bright red when he realizes, pausing whatever thought he had and telling you to stop staring.

racer!mark who lost it the first time you wore his jacket. you were curious, wanting to see how he would react, and mark couldn't believe just how good it looked on you. "it's—holy shit. you look—you look great, babe. you're—wow," mark fumbled out when you asked him how it looked, unable to tear his eyes away from you. something inside of him was hot, burning with desire from seeing you in his jacket. he pulled you to the bed, begging for you to keep the jacket on while he fucked you.

racer!mark who does everything he can to make sure the whole word knows you're his. he has a possessive streak that never seems to end, constantly leaving marks all over your body. you always return the favor, almost just as possessive as him, wanting people to know that mark lee, the world’s biggest star, is yours. they'll never be able to have him the way you do.

racer!mark who loves to fuck you in his car. at first, he was unsure until you brought up the idea. all it took was a simple, "wouldn't it be nice to fuck me here?" before he cracked, the both of you climbing into the back seat.

racer!mark who lets you ride him (in his car, of course) until he's begging to cum inside you, overwhelmed with how good your tight cunt feels around his cock and how hot it is to have you on top of him, defiling his most prized possession.

racer!mark who flushes bright red every time you promise him 'something fun' before a race, whispering in his ear about everything you'll let him do to you if he wins. he'll be damned if he lets someone else beat him, especially when he's being promised having you in his bed tonight.

racer!mark who loves to praise you, telling you how good you are every chance he gets. he'll tell you how good you feel around him or how perfect you are for him, taking his cock like you were made for it. he's never been able to be quiet in bed, mumbling to himself about how fucking good your pussy feels and how he can never get enough of you.

racer!mark who easily gets jealous when you teasingly bring up his competitors, especially his rival haechan. you do it to work him up, wanting to push him to the edge. mark's always sweet with you in bed, giving you whatever you want, but sometimes, you want him to be mean. nothing gets him there quicker than an offhand comment that goes something along the lines of wanting to take a ride with haechan instead. mark hates this. you're his and no one else's. it causes him to finally snap, pinning you down into the sheets and fucking you like there's no tomorrow. "you're mine, baby. all fucking mine," he'll growl out, punctuating each word with a thrust.

a/n: i mainly reposted this bc i got an ask about it and figured it would make more sense if u guys got the racer!mark details… ☀️🐰 anon if u see this…. this was for u.. ANYWAYS i love doing headcanons so if u guys have any headcanon requests thennnnnnnn u know where to find me!

[lyvhie]

hi omg read the jeno one I requested ATE DOWNNNNNN…… so for nowwwww maybe thinking jeno (sorry I love him…) x shy!reader who doesent really like the idea of jeno seeing her naked cause reader is SCAREDDDD… so he just praises her throughout the whole thing… LOVE UR WORKS they’re so good 💖

-🦋🦋🦋🦋

touch it | ljn

jeno x fem!reader (18+ mdni)

summary: jeno never intended to invest so much time and effort just to have sex with you.

a/n: my sweet 🦋 anon... i'm sorry it took me so long to post this. as soon as i saw it i started writing but it wasn't coming out like i think it should and i didn't want to give you something bad 😞 please forgive me 🙏 i hope you like this one too, it ended up being longer than i was planning. love u, please don't give up on me!

cw: smut, shy/inexperienced!reader, jeno big dick agenda, very slightly bulge kink, fingering, oral (m), unprotected penetrative sex (bcs i forgot to write the condom part sorryyy 🫣), praising, pet names.

jeno never considered himself a patient person. he always got what he wanted when he wanted. and that's why you were driving him crazy.

at first, he enjoyed toying with you, finding it effortless to get under your skin. it was just a game to him, a way to pass the time by teasing and taunting. he loved pushing your buttons with even the slightest action, knowing how easily you would react.

he wasn't entirely sure why you acted the way you did around him. was it shyness or fear of people in general? perhaps a combination of both. regardless, he found your reactions incredibly endearing. whenever he looked at you, he couldn't help but smile at the way you fidgeted and stumbled over your words.

it was cute. he just knew he had to fuck you. he made it his personal goal.

he was aware that winning you over wouldn't be easy, and that he'd have to gain your trust and go through the whole song and dance. but he saw it as a thrilling challenge, and he was determined to make you his.

he surprisingly found it easy to become your friend. given your lonely nature, he didn't need to put in much effort. you didn't appear to have many friends, which made it simple for him to step in and fill that role.

what began as innocent gestures, like whispering sweet nothings in your ear or tenderly tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, quickly escalated into more intimate encounters.

his “accidental” touches or the casual placing of his hand on your thigh, how he enjoyed wrapping his arms around you from behind, his chest pressed against your back as his hands gently roamed your sides. he did all of this to get rise out of you, to see you get all flustered and embarrassed and it worked perfectly.

he knew that simply being a good friend wouldn't be enough to take you to bed with your legs all open for him, so he doubled down on his efforts. he had to be the best friend you ever had.

he became the person you could count on for anything — if something was troubling you, he'd be there to listen and provide comfort. you wanted a plushie from your favorite show? no problem, he would make sure to get it for you. feeling lonely and in need of companionship? all you had to do was call him, and he'd be right there for you.

all of it was part of his grand scheme to lower your defenses and draw you closer to him. and it worked little by little.

when you confessed that you had never kissed anyone before, his response was instant: "that's what friends are for." he gauged your reaction, noticing the way you nibbled on your lip and fidgeted with the hem of your skirt, all little habits that he had noticed in you a long time ago.

his words were merely to test the waters, to see how you would respond to his subtle advances. he was overjoyed when you finally agreed to his suggestion, after taking some time to consider (a good 5 minutes). he couldn't help but feel proud that he was the one who would get to kiss your innocent lips, a thought that thrilled him. this small victory fueled his confidence in the belief that winning you over wouldn't be hard.

it was fun to him, teaching you how to kiss for the first time and seeing your reaction to his touch. the moment he reached out to touch your face, you quickly recoiled, as if you had been burned. it just fueled his desire to go further and explore this nervous, inexperienced side of you.

"relax, baby," he spoke softly, your favorite term of endearment rolling off his tongue effortlessly. he gently took your hand in his, soothingly rubbing his thumbs over your skin in a reassuring manner. it was his way of calming you down, a small gesture that never failed to affect you.

as you tried to follow his words and relax, he cupped your face between his hands and leaned in closer. with a soothing tone, he instructed you to close your eyes. he was so close that you unconsciously held your breath, which made him chuckle. his breath ghosted over your skin as he spoke, his proximity to you causing your heart to flutter in your chest.

as his lips finally touched yours, a soft gasp escaped you and you nearly jolted. he started with just a gentle peck, giving you a chance to adjust to the sensation. your heart pounded wildly in your chest, the rapid rhythm so intense that you feared it might burst out of your chest at any moment. you were almost certain he could hear it, the sound of your heartbeats echoing in your ears and filling the silence between you.

his soft voice gently commanded, "open your mouth slightly, sweetheart," and you obeyed eagerly, parting your lips. a small hum escaped you as you felt the warm, wet touch of his tongue slipping into your mouth. the sudden sensation sent chills down your spine, surprising you in the most pleasurable way.

as you started moving your tongue against his, following the rhythm he set, he was the one who couldn't help but let out a pleased hum. his hand moved from your face to your hair, fingers gently grasping the locks and pulling you closer to him.

the feeling of your mouth against his, your inexperienced but eager tongue trying to keep up with his, was beyond what he imagined. the taste of you, so sweet and untainted, drove him to become more demanding, rougher, and you didn't seem to mind, responding to his intensity with a sense of abandon.

he carefully maneuvered you onto your back on the couch, crawling over you and bringing his body on top of yours. his hands began to explore your form, tracing every contour until they reached your thighs and gently caressed the soft skin. with a sly smile, he squeezed the supple flesh, grateful that you were wearing a skirt, making his plans even simpler.

tou were so absorbed in the way his mouth captured yours that it took awhile for you to notice his hand roaming further up your skirt. the feeling of his fingers slowly tracing your inner thigh sent shivers up your spine, igniting sparks of pleasure that made you almost gasp into his mouth.

you managed to pull away from the kiss, panting for air, and stopped his hand before it went any higher. "w-wait, jeno," you gasped, your voice breathless and filled with hesitation.

jeno's breath was shallow, his mouth moving to your neck as he inhaled your scent and began to place soft, gentle kisses there, making you left a soft sigh. he hummed against your skin, his voice still unsteady as he responded to you. "what is it, baby?" he murmured against your skin, his warm breath teasing your sensitive flesh.

“i-i don't—” your words were interrupted by a gasp as he sucked on your neck, his lips creating a pleasant suction that made your head spin. but as he continued to nibble and kiss your skin, you softly pleaded, "j-jeno, stop.”

jeno grudgingly pulled away from your neck, his eyes a mix of desire and annoyance as he looked at you. but you were too flustered to notice his expression, hastily hiding your face in your hands, unable to meet his gaze. your embarrassment was palpable, and the moment was suspended in a brief silence.

before he could utter another word, you hastily scrambled out from under him, mumbling a clumsy excuse before hastily retreating to your room. he sat there on the couch, a little bewildered, as he watched you disappear. the sound of your door closing echoed in the silence that followed, leaving him alone with his frustrated thoughts.

he ran his hand through his hair. of course he wouldn't get in your panties so quickly. he got a little carried away by the moment and forgot that he needed to take things very slowly with you.

he had assumed you would lock yourself in your room for a while longer, probably consumed by a million thoughts and doubts that he was all too familiar with at this point.

after a while, he stood up from the couch and approached your door, knocking softly on the wood. "i'll be waiting," he called out softly, and that was all he said.

he was already starting to turn away, but the sound of the door opening caught his attention. you emerged from behind the opening, looking at him timidly, and he was taken aback by your whispered request.

"can we... keep practicing? j-just the kissing…" you spoke in a small voice, your words barely audible but filled with trepidation and desire. he froze for a moment, surprised by the unexpected request, before a smirk tugged at the corner of his lips.

“you don't have to ask twice, sweetheart.”

in the days that followed, a new routine was established between you and him. every time you found yourselves together, whether at his place or yours, the hours would pass in a haze of lip and tongue, mouths moving against each other in a frenzy. by the end of each session, your lips would be swollen and sensitive to the touch, a reminder of the time spent indulging in such an activity.

but what truly fueled jeno's frustration was the fact that your interactions always seemed to stop at the same point. no matter how much he touched and caressed you, nothing ever went further than a few brief moments of physical contact.

he felt an intense sense of desperation growing within him, the unfulfilled desire weighing heavily on his mind. he longed to take things further, to explore more of you, but somehow he always found himself stuck in this endless cycle of heated yet ultimately unsatisfying make-out sessions.

he was already mentally bracing himself for the challenges ahead, but then you caught him off guard once more.

sitting on his lap, your tongues intertwined in a hungry dance, you suddenly did something unexpected. you began to subtly grind against his thigh, your movements and moans so natural it was as if you weren't fully aware of what you were doing.

the sensations were immediate, and he felt a twitch in his pants. the feeling of you riding his leg set his body trembling with desire. a low groan escaped him, his kiss growing more fierce as he tried to keep himself together in the face of your unintentional provocation. he could feel his arousal growing with each passing moment, and the thought of having you so close yet so out of reach was driving him insane.

jeno's grip on your waist became a little tighter as he pulled you down, pressing you against him more firmly. the thin fabric of your shorts did little to disguise the wetness building between your thighs, leaving a noticeable dampness on his pants.

your moans grew a little louder as you lost yourself in the sensations, and jeno reluctantly broke the kiss to look at you. he clutched your waist, stopping your movements and holding you firmly in place, drawing a whine from you.

your words escaped your lips involuntarily, a soft plea for more. "jeno, please," you murmured, desperation tinging your voice. he chuckled softly at the sound of your plea, his smirk growing wider. “please what, baby?" he whispered, his lips brushing gently against yours, barely making contact, teasing you with the lightest touch.

his question hung in the air, unanswered, leaving you floundering to articulate your desires. you felt a mixture of shyness and embarrassment, unable to vocalize what you truly wanted. so, your response was a soft whine as you hid your face in the crook of his neck. his chest vibrated with a low chuckle, his amusement evident at your inability to express yourself clearly.

“you want some relief here, sweetie?” his hand slid between your legs, his middle finger pressing against your clothed cunt, making you gasp at the sudden contact.

this time, you made no attempt to stop him, instead nodding silently in agreement. you buried yourself deeper into the safety of his neck, feeling embarrassment and need. you knew deep down that you were desperate for some form of release, and the realization only flustered you.

jeno, on the other hand, was practically bursting with excitement and joy, mentally launching fireworks and wanting to dance a victory lap around the house. he was finally close to getting the hardest fuck of his life — not exactly in the good way.

his voice was a soft whisper in your ear as he nibbled gently on your earlobe, sending shivers down your spine. "we should do something about it, shouldn't we, pretty girl?" he murmured, his nose nuzzling tenderly against your ear. "will you let me help you again?" he asked, his breath warm against your skin.

your response was immediate, a desperate plea for his touch. "yes, please," you managed to stutter out, your voice tinged with a hint of need.

even though he just wanted to empty his balls, he knew he had to make you experience some of the sensations and induce you to want more.

jeno leaned against the bedhead, preparing himself for what was to come. his one hand began to trace gentle circles on your thigh, while the other continued to soothe you with soft caresses on your back. "okay, baby," he assured you. "just relax and let me take care of you, alright?”

jeno had become skillful in taking care of you, and his request for you to relax was met with an immediate submission from you. he wasted no time moving your pajamas shorts out of the way, efficiently tugging the fabric to the side.

due to your current position, where you were on his lap, with your chest pressed against his and your face still buried in his neck, jeno had limited visibility of you. he could feel your body against his, but he couldn't see much more than that. despite being mildly frustrated by the lack of visual access, he knew you wouldn't pull away anytime soon, even if he asked. you seemed too focused on hiding your flustered face against his skin.

even so, he could feel how soaked your panties were and that was enough for him right now. once again, jeno wasted no time in his actions, pulling your panties to the side with decisive motion. his digits pressed gently against your sensitive flesh, eliciting sigh from you. his fingers parted your folds, gently exploring your wetness with delicate movements. he took his time, savoring the moment, your soft sounds and how you were already squirming with just a few touches.

you gasped as he slipped a finger inside you. he started pumping slowly, he could feel how tight you were and he couldn't help but feel his cock stir inside his pants, his mind swirling with thoughts of what it would be like to be inside you.

"how does it feels, baby?" he coos, adding another finger to stretch you just enough, feeling how you clenched around his digits and moaned timidly into his neck. “g-good… very good,” was all you could mutter, your breath hitching as you felt him scissor and curl.

jeno hummed, a contented sound escaping him, as he used his free hand to gently push away the strands of hair that hung over your neck. he pressed his lips against your skin, gently kissing and nibbling at the sensitive flesh, feeling a shiver run through you.

jeno's fingers began to search inside you, seeking out the spot that would make you melt. when you trembled and a loud moan escaped you, his smirk widened. "found it," he chuckled, continuing to target that sweet spot with deliberate precision.

he added pressure with his palm against your clit, rubbing it softly but firmly enough to ignite intense sensations. he knew exactly how sensitive you were, and even this gentle touch was more than enough to leave you moaning and trembling.

jeno nuzzled your ear, his breath warm against your skin as he spoke soft words to you. "you sound so pretty, baby," he murmured, his hand never ceasing its movement as he felt your body clenching around him. "i know you're close already," he continued, increasing the speed of his movements. "just let it go, don't hold it back, okay?" he coaxed.

you didn't even realize how close you were, the sensations stirring in your body completely unexpected. there was a strange feeling in your stomach, your toes curling as you clung to him tighter. then, his words struck you like a command, and suddenly, a wave of pleasure washed over you. the new sensation was overwhelming, almost transporting you to another realm.

jeno absolutely loved the way you mewled his name in the midst of your climax. he relished in the sweet sounds you made, eagerly anticipating the chance to hear more and feel more of you. his desire was palpable as he continued to watch you come undone in his arms.

with your body quivering from the aftermath of your climax, you leaned against him, allowing your weight to fully rest on him. the tingles that coursed through you seemed to reach every inch of your skin, leaving you breathless. you panted slightly as you felt your body slowly returning to a state of stability.

jeno slowly withdrew his fingers, wiping them clean on your shorts. with a gentle tug, he drew your face away from his neck, allowing him to finally get a proper look at you.

your mind was still hazy from the intensity of your climax, and you barely registered his actions until you saw the smug expression on his face. the realization that you looked so utterly wrecked just from a little fingering made jeno silently contemplate how you would look when he pushed you further than just his fingers.

you were on the verge of speaking when he silenced you with a kiss, a kiss that you gladly returned. the touch of his hands slipping under your shirt sent a shiver down your spine, his fingers gently caressing your bare skin. you felt his touch drifting over the clasps of your bra, his movements deliberate and suggestive.

despite being consumed by the myriad of sensations he was evoking in you, you couldn't help but notice the way his hand tugged at the hem of your shirt, clearly signaling his intention to remove it. but as he began to lift the fabric, you instinctively halted his movements by placing your hands over his, preventing him from proceeding further. you pulled away from the kiss, gazing into his eyes a hint of hesitation.

“n-not yet, jeno,” you managed to stutter out, biting your lower lip as you averted your gaze from him. the thought of revealing yourself even partially in front of him sent a wave of fear and nervousness coursing through you. despite the intimate moment you had just shared, the idea of baring your body to him, even further, felt overwhelmingly nerve-wracking.

frustration and disappointment etched itself across jeno's features as he suppressed the urge to curse aloud. instead, he released a soft, frustrated breath, his forehead coming to rest against yours. he had been eagerly anticipating a night of finally fucking you senseless until you can't even remember your name, and your hesitation dampened that hope once again.

your soft-spoken words brought him back from his momentary disappointment. "but i..." you began, your voice tinged with coynes and a hint of determination. "i want to make you feel good too," you confessed, your eyes drifting down to his lap, where you couldn't help but notice the evidence of his arousal. there was curiosity and desire in your tone as you confessed your wish to return the favor. “j-just tell me what to do…”

a spark of something akin to admiration and appreciation flared up in jeno's eyes as he processed your words. out of all the things you had ever said, these words felt like music to his ears. a hopeful glimmer of satisfaction shone through, a realization that the night might not be a complete wash after all.

jeno chuckled affectionately, his voice carrying a hint of genuine appreciation as he spoke. "that's so nice of you, sweetie,” he murmured, gifting you a gentle peck on the lips which prompted a smile to bloom on your face. following his instructions, you carefully repositioned yourself, assuming a kneeling position between his legs, your eyes looking up at him expectantly.

a glimmer of greed flickered through Jeno's eyes as he took in the sight of you looking up at him. his hand cupped your face, his touch soft as he traced his fingers along your cheek. a subtle smile played at his lips as he issued a command, his voice dripping with desire. “you can start by taking off my clothes,” he murmured, his eyes locked on yours, hungry and full of heat.

you followed his directions without hesitation, slowly unbuttoning his pants and gently pulling them down, the sound of the fabric rubbing against his skin filling the room. as the fabric pooled around his ankle, your eyes couldn't help but drift towards his impressive package, your breath catching in your throat at the sight.

you saw a darker spot on the fabric of his boxes, damp with pre-cum, you wasted no time in removing the remaining piece, freeing his aching cock that stood proudly in front of your eyes, eliciting a soft sigh of relief from him.

you continued to stare at his dick, blinking a few times as you processed the sight. he was big. too big.

jeno chuckled heartily at the sight of your eyes widening in surprised awe, his ego swelling with a touch of cocky confidence. he knew exactly what was running through your mind. "don't be shy, pretty girl," he teased, a sly smile playing on his lips. "you can touch it." he leaned back, resting his weight on his hands as he waited for you to make a move.

as calm and collected as he appeared to be, jeno was practically craving your touch. his muscles tensed under your gaze, and there was a hint of desperation in his eyes as he longed for your caress. however, he was determined to maintain a facade of coolness, masking his inner pleading with subtle smirks and sultry words.

as your delicate hands finally encircled him, a soft sigh escaped jeno's lips, his eyes closing for a moment as he savored the sensation. jis breath hitched, his teeth gently sinking into his lower lip in response to the pleasure coursung through him. his dark gaze was fixed on you, watching intently as you explored him with a look of curiosity and wonder in your eyes.

you started to stroke his cock slowly, the pre-cum acting enough as a lubricant, facilitating your movements. “just like that, sweetheart,” he said in low groans, his breath heavy.

yes, this. more. fast. please. he closed his eyes tight to savor the sensation. each sweet, slow movement of your hand pushed him closer to relief. and then... a new sensation joined the others. a delicate, refreshing affection, at the tip of his cock. almost like a breeze. you were licking it. rolling that pink, shy and naughty tongue around the head of his erection. kissing and tasting lightly. the feeling was intense. sublime. insufficient.

it took him by surprise how you effortlessly seemed to know what to do, and he found himself thoroughly enjoying it. his hands threaded through your hair, his fingers delving into the soft strands as he lavished his touch upon your head. in that moment, he found himself unable to hold back his words. his voice came out in a rough whisper, "put it all in your mouth.”

for a brief moment, a flicker of worry crossed jeno’s expression. he feared that his request might have intimidated you, that you may stand up from your position on the ground and refuse to continue. he was on the verge of pleading with you, nearly uttering a desperate “please,” but before he could voice his concern, you unexpectedly acquiesced to his command, enveloping the head of his cock in your wet, ecstatic heat.

you began hesitantly. which was understandable, since this was your first time. but you didn't need much skill. he throbbed with desire while you showed great enthusiasm, even though you had no experience. there was little you could have done — except bite him, perhaps — that wouldn't have been delicious.

you were more than good. it was fantastic. he found himself rocking his pelvis, trying to go deeper each time your sweet, juicy mouth descended on him.

a ragged moan escaped his lips as he spoke, his grip on your hair growing tighter as he moved his hips in a quicker, more insistent rhythm. “you are doing so well, baby. so, so, well,” his words came out in a deep, raspy tone.

the mounting tension between you had taken its toll on jeno, and he was acutely aware of the pleasure that had been denied to him for a considerable amount of time. it was a struggle to maintain control, and he found himself teetering on the edge of climax.

as you continued your ministrations, he swallowed hard, the air around him seemingly growing thinner. his body trembled under your touch, his breath escaping in ragged gasps as he felt his climax building up, on the verge of tipping into pure ecstasy.

and, before he could even warn you, he came in your mouth, holding your head in place, forcing you to take his entire load. he didn’t mean to do that, but it felt so good he didn’t want you to pull away at the best part.

as you pulled away, gasping for breath, jeno's grip on your hair loosened, his hands gently releasing their hold on you. his own chest heaved with effort, his breathing ragged and labored from the intense encounter. he gazed at you with eyes heavy with desire, drinking in the sight of your disheveled appearance and the thin line of his cum that traced the corner of your mouth. in that moment, his expression was one of pure contentment and satisfaction.

a ghost of a smirk played at the corners of jeno's lips, his voice lacking any trace of remorse. "i'm sorry, i should have warned you, baby," he said, his words carrying a hint of satisfaction rather than regret.

you glanced up at him, offering a timid smile as you assured him, "i-it's okay, it wasn't that bad,” he watched as you ran your tongue over your lips, innocently cleaning the remnants of his essence.

god, he thought, you're so sexy.

from that point forward, not only had making out become a regular occurrence, but oral sex had become something you enthusiastically welcomed. jeno couldn't help but notice the change in you, how earnestly you seemed to embrace the act of pleasing him. it looked like you derived a sense of satisfaction from bringing him to such levels of ecstasy.

even though jeno was completely happy with the addition of a new activity to the menu, it still wasn't enough. don’t get him wrong, he loved getting a blowjob whenever either of you were in the mood, but what he really needed was to actual fuck you.

he found himself perplexed by your reluctance to take the next step. while he was fully aware of your penchant for shyness, he couldn't help but wonder why you hadn't given in yet.

considering the things you had already engaged in, he assumed that your comfort level would have already reached a point where you would be receptive to more.

the mounting impatience and desire finally got the better of him, and he decided that it was time to address the issue directly. he took a deep breath and gathered his thoughts before addressing you with a blunt question.

“baby, why don't you just let me fuck you?”

jeno caught you off guard, interrupting your casual routine as you were making your way to bed and using a towel to dry your hair. you momentarily froze, the towel suspended in mid-air as you turned to face him with widened eyes. “w-what? jeno…!” you stuttered as you hastily grabbed the towel, clutching it against your face in an attempt to conceal your flustered expression.

he couldn't help but roll his eyes, at your reaction, with a smirk on his lips and a chuckle in his voice, he reached out and pulled you closer to him, his arms encircling your waist and drawing you into his embrace. he settled his chin on your belly, gazing up at you with a curious expression and added with nonchalant tone, "i’m just curious, you know.”

with a single movement, jeno reached up and took the towel from your hands, tugging it away from your face to reveal your expression. his eyes scanned your face, taking in the adorable sight of you all bashful and shy.

"i-i..." your voice trailed off, your nervousness clearly evident. jeno's eyes remain fixed on you, waiting patiently for you to continue. sensing your hesitance, he encouraged you gently, his voice soft and soothing. "mmm, i'm listening," he urged, silently coaxing you to continue.

you averted his gaze, your voice barely above a whisper as you finally confessed. "i-it's just...you'll see me naked and all...," you admitted, the thought alone making your heart race with anxiety.

jeno's eyes widened momentarily as he processed your words, his expression alternating between disbelief and shock.

that was the reason? no fucking way.

"are you serious?" he asked, his voice filled with a touch of incredulity. you responded with an eager nod, still not looking at him, "i-i can't do that, you'll see everything!" your voice trembled slightly, the thought of being fully exposed in front of him clearly terrifying to you.

jeno couldn't believe what he was hearing. it seemed almost unbelievable that the reason you were hesitant to take the next step was solely because of the thought of being completely naked in front of him.

his facial expression softened as he tried to understand your perspective better. "baby, it's me, you know," he said, his voice gentle and reassuring. he reached out to cup your face, his touch tender. "you don't have to be embarrassed with me," he continued, his eyes searching yours.

"i...i know that," you stammered, feeling your heart fluttering in your chest at his touch and the soothing sound of his voice. despite knowing that he was someone you trusted deeply, the thought of being completely nude in front of him still felt overwhelming.

you tried to articulate your feelings, your words coming out in a shaky whisper. "but... it's just... i'm worried i won't look good enough for you," you confessed coyly.

great. you were insecure. he forgot that.

“that's just so stupid," he muttered, pulling you onto the bed with him and positioning you straddling his lap. his fingers gently cradled your chin, tilting your face up to meet his gaze. "you know i love every single part of you, right?" he repeated, his tone tender and sincere. "even those i'm yet dying to see," he added with a smirk, his eyes roaming over your body, taking in every contour. "you are just perfect.”

your eyes widened slightly at his words, his unwavering confidence in your beauty causing a flutter in your chest. insecurity still lingered, but the way he spoke with such certainty made your doubts waver.

your hands unconsciously found their way to his chest, fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as your breath hitched. "you...you really think that?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper as your lips form a small pout.

jeno chuckled softly, his hands moving from your face to your hips, their grip firm but gentle as they held you in place on his lap. "i don't just think it, i know it," he replied, his eyes scanning your face as his thumbs began to trace soothing circles on your hipbones.

his voice dropped lower as his eyes held your gaze, “your body is incredible," he repeated, "i love every inch of it." his expression softened, and he leaned in closer, his breath warm against your skin. "and i would love even more if you just let me see more of you. you have nothing to be shy about, baby. let me show you just how much i appreciate every part of you.”

your heart skipped a beat, his words igniting a flutter of anticipation within you. despite your lingering insecurities, you couldn't deny the way his words made your stomach churn with excitement and nervousness, he sounded so inviting.

after a few moments of contemplation, your voice trembled as you finally gave in, your eyes meeting his.

"o-okay," you whispered, the word barely audible, as if spoken more to yourself than to him. taking a deep breath, you made the decision, your heart racing in your chest. “i-it's fine.”

as soon as the words left your mouth, granting him permission, Jeno's lips were on yours in a heartbeat, the kiss passionate and feverish. his hands didn't waste any time either, slipping under the fabric of your shirt to caress the soft skin of your back.

“that's it, sweetie,” he said against your lips. “i promise it will be worth it,” he pulled you closer, the intensity of his embrace and the hungry way his tongue sought yours sending waves of pleasure coursing through you.

jeno's impatient hands were soon tugging at the hem of your shirt, his movements eager and insistent as he lifted it over your head, revealing your bare upper body, clad only in a bra. his breath caught in his throat as he took in the sight of your exposed skin, his eyes roaming over you, appreciating every inch. his hands continued to caress your skin, the feeling of flesh on flesh sending shivers down your spine.

his touch was gentle and deliberate, his fingers tracing soft lines along your collarbones, your arms, down your sides. he leaned forward, his lips pressing kisses along your neck and collarbones, nipping and nibbling at the sensitive skin there. "you are so beautiful, baby," he murmured against your skin. "i've been wanting to do this for so long.”

he continued to kiss and nibble at your neck and collarbones, his movements soft but insistent. as he trailed a path of kisses down your chest, his fingers traced the lace of your bra, tracing the edge of the fabric with the tip of his fingers.

his lips moved lower, his kisses growing more frantic as they reached your chest, his tongue tracing the contour of your cleavage as his hands continued to roam your body. his fingers trailed a path down your back to the clasp of your bra, his knuckles brushing against your skin as he fumbled to undo it.

jeno's fingers worked quickly to undo the clasp of your bra, his touch both impatient and skillful as he finally managed to free you from the confines of the undergarment. he pulled it away, revealing your bare chest to him, your tits jiggling slightly.

“fuck,” he exhaled a shaky breath, his eyes taking in the sight of your exposed flesh. "you're more beautiful than i ever imagined," he murmured, his voice filled with desire and awe.

as jeno continued to gaze at you, you couldn't help but feel a wave of shyness wash over you. your arms instinctively moved to cover your chest, attempting to shield yourself from his unabashed staring. embarrassed, you muttered, "s-stop looking at me like that.”

he reached out and gently pulled your arms away from your chest, exposing your bare skin again. “don’t be embarrassed,” he said, his voice soft and soothing. “you’re gorgeous. i could look at you all day.”

He leaned down, his hands trailing a path across your chest, his fingertips gently caressing your boobs. his touch was feather-light, almost reverent as he explored the contour of your flesh. he took his time, seemingly wanting to savor every moment of this encounter.

slowly, he lowered his head, his hand reaching out to cup one, his thumb brushed over your nipple, his fingers closing around your breast, squeezing gently as he drew your nipple into his mouth, sucking softly. he hummed contentedly, lost in the sensation, his lips working slowly, savoringly.

a soft gasp escaped your lips as jeno's tongue worked its magic, sending shivers down your spine. your body writhed beneath him, your fingers tangling in his locks, tugging at them softly.

feeling your body respond to his touch, he took the opportunity to lay you down on your back, gently coaxing you into the plush pillows. he never stopped his ministrations, he caught your nipple between his teeth, giving it a light bite and then sucking, his hands roaming over your body with a possessive touch, as if marking you as his own.

“god, you're so perfect," he whispered, he moved to your other tit, giving it the same attention. "don't hide yourself from me again.”

jeno's hands slid to the waistband of your shorts, his touch burning against your skin. he pulled them down, along with your panties, as you lifted your hips up to help him guide them down your thighs and off your body.

when you were finally bare before him, he couldn't help but take a moment from sucking your boobs to admire the sight of you laid out beneath him, open and vulnerable.

“look at how hot my pretty girl is,” he bite his lower lip, leaning closer to capture your lips in a rough kiss, his fingers making their way to between your thighs. he knew he needed to prepare you for the main event, to make sure you were ready for what he was dying to give you.

you were so sensitive that it was easy to get reactions from you, he didn't even need to finger you that much to make you come a few times, that, along a few praises on your ear while hitting your sweet spots, were enough to have you squirming under him.

jeno's breath was warm against your ear as he spoke, his words sending delightful shivers down your spine. "okay, sweetie," he whispered, his lips still pressed against the sensitive skin of your neck. "you're doing so well."

he could feel your quick breath and the sweat beginning to form on your forehead. his wrists were growing tired from his efforts, but he wasn't backing down. "i'll make you feel even better," he promised, his voice low and seductive.

he shifted his body, his hands working quickly to remove his clothes, discarding them carelessly on the floor beside the bed.

your eyes drank in the sight of jeno's body, taking in his toned muscles and the way his body glowed in the faint light of the room. your gaze fell on his cock standing proud and ready, and a wave of heat washed over you, making you instinctively press your legs together. he was so hot. it was unfair how good he looked.

“like what you see, pretty?” he asked with a smug smile. you weren't brave enough to say the words out loud, but you wanted him to know that you appreciated him too, so you only nodded fiercely, making him laugh and lean over you to press his lips against yours in a gentle kiss while positioning himself between your legs, his erection rubbing against your thigh.

jeno broke the kiss to look into your eyes, his gaze intense and serious. he gently cradled your chin in his hand as he spoke, his voice filled with concern and desire. "just listen to me for a moment, okay?" he said softly. "i need you to promise me that if it becomes too much, if it hurts in any way, you'll tell me to stop. can you do that for me, baby?”

his words hung in the air for a moment, the implications clear. you knew why he was saying that. the size of his cock was undoubtedly intimidating, and it was natural to feel a pang of fear. but your desire for him overpowered any reservations you might have had.

with a nod, you responded. "yes, jeno, i can," you gave him a small smile, "i’ll tell you if it's too much.” he studied your face for a moment, making sure you were sincere and not just saying it to please him. he could see the want in your eyes. the way you nodded your head and answered him firmly gave him the reassurance he needed.

“that’s my good girl,” he kissed your cheek, straightening his back and wrapping his hand around his cock, stroking it a few times before pressing it against your entrance, teasing you lightly by rubbing the tip up and down.

then, he slowly pushed his lenght inside you, as he advanced, you gasped and clutched the sheets, small whimpers of pain escaping your lips. you were lucky you were wet enough to ease the pain, his dick slid into you with ease, he really prepared you well.

jeno's expression mirrored pleasure, his eyes closing in ecstasy as he threw his head back and let out a silent moan. it was as if he had been waiting for this moment for an eternity, and the feeling of you enveloping him was like entering a state of nirvana.

he paused for a moment, his body trembling with pleasure and exertion, as he looked at you. he was breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling as he tried to regain control of his breathing.

"are you doing okay, baby?" he asked, his voice hoarse and low, he wasn't even half way and you seemed to be struggling already.

he looked at your face, taking in the expression of pain and pleasure mingled on your features as your eyebrows furrowed and your eyes welled up with tears. despite the discomfort you were feeling, you reassured him. “y-yes, keep going," you managed to say through trembling lips, your voice shaky but determined. "i can take it, i promise.”

jeno couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for finding you so incredibly hot even in that moment. he leaned in closer, pressing his face against your neck, and sought out your hands, intertwining his fingers with yours. it was an attempt to provide some distraction from the pain, and his words were a soothing whisper against your skin.

"that's it, sweetheart," he murmured, his voice low and comforting. "you're doing so well. just a little more,” he continued to move his hips, causing you to gasp once more, and he couldn't help but moan at the feeling of you squeezing him. his grip on your hands tightened as he fought to maintain control of his own desire to simply fuck you hard.

and when he was finally fully inside you, a wave of relief washed over you, releasing a soft sigh from your lips, you never felt so full before.

he soon let go of your hand to straighten his back again, you were speared open by his cock and when he pressed the palm of his hand on your belly and you felt the bulge he made there, it was too much. neither of you were expecting you to cum right now, your voice crying out his name as your entire body tremble.

“fuck, baby, already?” he asked under his breath, a smile on his lips. again, that was so hot of you. he can't believe he made you come like that.

and that was enough for him. he pulled his hips back slowly, his cock almost all the way out, a brief moment of relief when your insides were empty again, which didn't take long when he pushed back into you hardly, his tip hitting your cervix, making you both moan loudly. you didn't even had time to recover from the most intense orgasm of your whole life.

“fuck,” he said almost breathless. “feel that, pretty girl?” his grip on your hips tightened enough to feel painful and leave bruises. “feel how deep i am?”

the room was filled with sounds of skin against skin as he increased his pace, thrusting even harder while voicing out a few praises to you, saying how well you take him, how good your pussy feel, how he wanted to fill you up with his cum.

he nipped and nibbled at the sensitive flesh, leaving behind a trail of kisses and light love bites as he continued to move in and out of you. your name spilled from his lips like a prayer, a plea, a mantra.

you had intended to speak, to ask him to slow down, but before you could utter a word, jeno sealed your lips with his own, effectively silencing your pleas. his kiss consumed you, capturing all your moans and protests.

he picked up the pace, his movements growing more urgent, more desperate as he feel himself getting closer to his climax. jeno's voice was a low, seductive whisper, his breath hot against your neck. "gonna fill you up, pretty," he murmured, his teeth sinking into your flesh. "you're gonna take every single drop," he whispered fiercely, nibbling at your neck once more as he continued to move, his thrusts growing more insistent.

his hand went to your clit, wanting to make you cum once again, this time right with him. he was close to his limit and he knew he was overstimulating you, then it wouldn't be so difficult. within moments, jeno felt his body become tense and his thrusts more erratic, his movements stuttering even more as he felt you tighten around him.

it didn't take long for you both to cum and you feet him fill you with his hot seed, both moaning loudly. jeno gave a few more thrusts to make sure you were going to take everything he had to give you before pulling out of you.

jeno's body collapsed onto yours, both of you panting and struggling to catch your breath in the aftermath of your climax. the room was filled exclusively with the sounds of your labored breathing.

you could feel the hotness of his skin against yours, his heartbeat racing against your chest as he tried to regain some control over his own breathing. his weight pressed you into the mattress, his body limp and sated.

he buried his face against your shoulder, his breath warm against your neck. his grip on you loosened, his arms coming to rest by your sides as he lay on top of you, completely spent.

after a few moments of comfortable silence, jeno rolled off you and settled onto his back beside you. he broke the silence, his voice gentle, "how are you feeling, baby?" he asked, turning his head to look at you. he noticed the tired yet content smile on your face.

“blissful,” you answered with a light giggle, making him smile back at you.

good. he was going to focus on that now instead of thinking about how stupid he was for cumming inside you on the first fuck and how this could be a big problem in the future.

[fuxuannie]

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ  𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐢 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢 𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 | kenji sato x gender neutral reader

love mail     —      ヽ(o´3`o)ﾉ full & utter credit to @coralwitchsheep in support of their preview of a kenji x reader series they're starting! (i'd suggest reading theirs first before reading this for context) i'm inlove w the idea and can't wait to read the next parts o(T□T)o ♡♡ this is my own spin on it, so to cut it short — likely not canon events! i js wanted to make a oneshot w relatively same concept,, if this does okay maybe part two. maybe ! (this is kinda long 🙁)

︰꒱꒱ "THAT WENT WELL." you grumbled, entering your home with a frustrated sigh. what kind of guy runs away from an interview? all you asked was what could've possibly made him want to start from the beginning by coming back to japan. sure, maybe you startled him with your presence after 20 years, but come on. can't he be a little more professional? and maybe a little more welcoming to his best friend once upon a time?

as you snuggled into the comfort of your couch, you wanted to binge watch a few movies that you've been putting off.. but work called. you had to check your email incase any of your private interview bookings were accepted, or if the head journalist had yet another task for you. and if so, then to your dismay you'd have to figure out bookings and schedule.. and you should've been overjoyed to not receive any new ones, but there was one unopened email. curiously, you click on it — and you pause. kenji sato, as in — the one that just ran off after a single question, kenji sato? how did he find your email.. something you'll have to figure out later, but continuing to scan the contents, it seems like he wanted to have a one on one interview, and everything had been planned in advanced. it's in a restaurant not far from your home, in fact.. it was your favorite one from when you were a kid. reading the restaurant name makes you smile a little, fond memories of kenji's family and yours going there together, but you quickly shake your head to focus, this was basically work — after all.

it was a dinner, he wanted to apologize for his dismissive attitude to you earlier that day and give you a private interview. the entire email honestly felt computer generated, if mina wrote it you wouldn't be surprised until you got to the end;

"please, (name), let's catch up. professional setting or not, that's up to you. i just need to see you."

now you had to admit, that felt...— you weren't sure what it felt like, but you felt something while reading that. your fingers swiftly type back a response, accepting the invitation, with no bad blood between them for the prior interaction. as you click send, your mind began to wander off to possible situations. after all, twenty years.. it's a significant amount of time, and people can change — you just hoped it wouldn't be the worst reunion in the world.

the following day passed like spring breeze, next thing you knew you were dressing up for the arranged meeting with kenji. unsure whether to be casual or business, you weren't even set onto whether you wanted to catch up, or catch a story. job or feelings? now that's a hard decision. in the end, you went for a mix of both, a casual business attire.

you wondered if it was intentional for kenji to pick a place so close to home, literally and figuratively; it was a 5 minute walk and it.. honestly means a lot to you. your family still visits there often, and there's not one day that they don't discuss how much more joyful things would be with the sato's to share a meal with you. you couldn't help but silently agree, even if you wanted to act like you hated kenji for leaving.

you thought it would be smart to be there 10 minutes earlier, but kenji seems to have beaten you. he hasn't noticed you coming in yet, however he seems nervous. he's talking with the elderly head chef, who could easily recognize professor sato's only son boy — catching up after all those years. his head moves to the door by coincidence, catching your gaze. you wave hello and he smiles, waving back.

"holy shit." kenji feels like the air from his lungs is stolen right out of him. you've grown so much, well — yes, of course, it has been years, but god he didn't think you'd still have that affect on him. even as kids, as teenagers, and now as an adult — he couldn't help but feel breathless at the sight of you.

"hi mr. sato." you'll start, sitting next to him and giving a friendly smile. he laughed, taking his shades off his face and resting them down onto the table. "you know you don't have to do that with me, use my name. it's not like we're strangers." you didn't expect that, and kenji could see that in your eyes — he almost regrets saying it the way he did, but your expression melts into a much more casual one. "alright, kenji."

his attitude felt different, honestly. the things you've read about him from articles, he's an egoist — completely full of himself, he just can't stop talking about his own achievements. so to sit right next to him, and to feel like you're a little kid again, just eating wirh your best friend.. it's weird.

the silence is suffocating, food sizzling on pans and fire burning were the only things being 'exchanged' between the two of you.

deciding to break the silence, you cleared your throat. "so.. how has life been in america?" you immediately regret it. now you'll have to listen to him boast about his wins, how happy he's been — how you haven't even crossed his mi— "lonely."

your racing thoughts came to a pause at the sound of his voice, weirdly vulnerable, — you unknowingly made it so easy for him. "it was lonely. sure, but i won't lie—" kenji chuckled, although it lacked the joyful emotion tied to such form of laughter, and instead — sorrow. "the spotlights great. winning awards and trophies, it's what i've wanted to do for years. but.."

his hand moves over to his face, and suddenly it's harder to keep eye contact with you. he leans back into his chair and scoffs, looking away. "i missed japan. i missed my family.. i — i missed you."

your mouth goes slightly agape in an 'o' shape. you suddenly fumble on any words you can think of, even in your own mind, you begin to stutter. "i'm—" you'll try to speak but it's like you have no mouth, nothing can describe how you feel at the moment, it's such a basic and simple arrangement of words, an 'i miss you', and yet — why do you feel like this? you resented him for not calling, you envied how happy he was through a tv screen, and you wished that he'd just.. come back. and he did. he was doing exactly what you had hoped for in the past 20 years but — "i.. i've watched your life through a screen. every game, every loss, anything that involved you. and for those years, it felt impossible to tell *anyone* we were best friends. once." the *once* hit kenji harder than you thought. "but i wished, like some child spotting a shooting star — that you'd call. and not those half assed ones, where it was really just our parents talking and they call us over to say hi to each other. i mean, like we used to."

"what do you mean?" "you know what i mean."

your mind feels nostalgic as you reminicse; "2AM, you'll be talking about some punk from school who gave you trouble. and how i'd promise i'll beat them up once mom and dad had enough money to visit." a pitiful sigh escaped your lips. "they never did."

"i just.. i never wanted to move on, kenji. i never wanted to stop waiting. but.. i didn't want to keep feeling like a dog at your door for you."

as clichè as it is to hug someone during a dramatic monologue, kenji felt like there was nothing else he could do. words were practically silence when actions could do much more for him. his arms wrapped around you tightly, and his face was buried into your shoulder. he wanted to explain, but there was so much to cover in so little time — and he honestly just wanted you to feel better at the moment. "i wish i had known this is how you felt all those years apart. and i wish that i could've done more, but shit happens and i—"

and it's even more clichè to return that hug, with just as much feeling. "i know. and let's just.. talk things out, yeah? i've got a free day tomorrow so.. i don't think i'll mind spending the night with you."

"reword please, you'd love to spend the night with me."

"don't flatter yourself too much before i change my mind."

"alright alright, let's just eat already."

[mtchee]

An Honour to be in a Harem!? - [Genshin Impact SAGAU] | MDNI | GN AFAB 18+

blurb:

The concept of all these gorgeous people bowing before you is hard to grasp, but it's even worse to think that they'd actually offer themselves to you as a love interest. So obviously, you brush them off and decline, retorting that just because you're their supposed Creator doesn't mean they should feel as though they had to subject themselves to your unwanted affection. After all, who were you really, to compare to them? Unfortunately (or fortunately, actually) they seem quite boggled at your output. Ah! It all makes sense now! Their dearly Beloved is the shy type! Worry not, your Grace! Your dearest acolytes are more than happy to bask in any sort of attention you decide to share! Rest assured, they'll take care of all your needs~

cw: not edited, second-person-pov, kind of a sequel?, afab bodied, you are dearly beloved and longed for <3, realistically if this happened i would rather die of a heart attack, lots of love and affection!!, mdni, spicy content, swearing, smut, overstim, manhandling, voyeurism, squirting, fingering, cunnilingus, sub [name], use of terms cunny cunt pussy tit breasts, help i'm embarassed i wrote this omfg who am i, would u believe me if i said this is my first smut

| masterlist | genshin impact collection |

< prev. - amab! ver.

[3.0k]

What is this bullshit.

You can't help but just blink at the Archon knelt at your feet, his head bowed low. When you emit a shocked squeak he looks up at you, amber eyes latching onto your flustered expression.

Your gaze darts around the few others surrounding your throne--you only really sit in it when the people of teyvat line up for personal prayers and blessings, or when someone tells you to. Otherwise, you avoid sitting in it.

Venti, Ei, Al-haitham, Ayato, Ningguang, Jean, Furina, Neuvillette, and Tartaglia stand past Zhongli who is knelt before you.

You force a polite smile and let out a nervous laugh, "Aha, um... d-dont.. you don't have to do that. Really."

"Do not misunderstand, Beloved," The geo Archon stands to his full height, and you feel small despite the grandness of your seat, "it truly would be my--our, utmost honour." He places a hand over his heart and bows lowly by the waist. The others follow in tandem, and you panic.

"No! Really," Although all your fanfic dreams were coming true, knowing that these are now very much real people and not just characters put you on edge. They all have their own lives to live, their own goals and ambitions, likes and dislikes, preferences and attractions that you certainly didn't and never would attain.

At first, the idea is flustering and the offer makes you feel giddy, but looking into it, you feel bad. They see you as their All-Maker, who are you to make them miserable?

"You don't need to do that. I-I know there's that rumour going around, but really, I'm fine by myself."

"Your Grace," Ei steps forwards with a tiny furrow in her thin brows, "please, it would be our honour--"

"You know what would really be an honour," Your heart stings slightly, but you straighten up on your throne and give your audience a reassuring smile, "is if you went out on your own to seek who you actually love, to find a partner you'll be happy to spend your time with--to love on your own accord. That, would be an honour, I'd say."

You're not oblivious to how everyone reels back at your words, a mixture of shock, fear, and disbelief covering their features sported by prominent frowns.

Al-haitham is the one to break the tense silence that freezes the room.

"Beloved," His eyes flicker over you, thought and theories wiring around his ever working mind, "are we unsatisfactory?"

You blanch, "Gah! No! Oh my--it's nothing like that!" You can't help but feel flushed under the intensity of their eyes.

"It's just, you need to not see me as a duty."

You address them calmly, forcing your fluttering feelings down to school your face passively.

"You need to focus on yourselves, and your own lives. I'm not here to come between that."

Their silent stares are unnerving, and Venti and Furina share a look with hidden smiles while Jean steps forward with a respecful bow.

"Of course, your Grace."

"F-Fuck..!"

Embarassed tears sting your eyeline while you hold your breath, desperately trying to get ahold of yourself.

Plap! Plap! Plap!

Your pretty eyes roll to the back of your head and a loud moan is forced out of you each time Ayato's fat cock plunges in and out of your sloppy cunt.

He sits leant against the finest silken pillows with your naked back pressed against his bare, toned chest, an arm wrapped securely around your waist while the other sweetly fondles with one of your spit laden breasts.

Thoma lay stomach down on the soft doona, face buried dutifully between your quivering thighs which he holds apart with surprising strength. He tongues at your swollen clit fervently, and you cry out in humiliation when your slick gushes from your slit and onto the expensive fabric below.

"G-nngh!" You clench your eyes shut at the embarassingly loud noise of skin slapping against skin and the lewd sucks of Thoma's mouth and the squelching of your pussy, "a-ah..! Ah! Ah!"

The Kamisato Commisioner lets out a low moan by your ear, feeling your hot and gummy walls squeeze down on his cock deliciously.

"Remember-- hng! R-Remember to breathe, my beloved."

He gently squishes the enticing softness of your tit, bucking up into you abruptly when you let out a squeal as he pinches your nipple.

"M-Mm~ my dearest," Thoma moans onto your slickened pearl, and you just about explode at the burst of electric pleasure that shoots up your spine, "you taste.. divine..~!"

Your heart thrums at the messy sight of him, his lips, chin and cheeks covered in your honey thick slick with half lidded eyes locked onto your expressions. You let out a needy moan when you notice him desperately grinding his naked hips into the bedding for release.

A now all too familiar searing pleasure suddenly coils in the utmost depth of your body, and you scream at the sheer ferocity of it.

"C-Can't! I can't!"

You buck your hips away from Ayato's throbbing length and bump into Thoma's chin, but they only follow you--the commisioner's arm moving from your waist to your hips, locking you in place while Thoma's grip moves from your thighs to the underside of your knees, opening you up and forcibly holding you still.

You dig your nails into Ayato's arm, your other hand fruitlessly shoving at the housekeeper's head to push him away.

The pleasure becomes piercing, and you choke on a sob as your gushing cunny just goes squelch, squelch, squelch with every thrust you have to take. His cock feels so dangerously good, and you fear your clit might bleed from its continuous onslaught of pleasure.

Thoma's tongue licks at the opening of your slit and the base of his lord's cock, and Ayato curses lowly, his grip tightening.

You feel something thick and heavy and hot spurt inside you, though the pounding doesn't let up and the near painful coil violently pops inside you, and you shriek in tandem with the burst of watery clear fluid that squirts from your throbbing cunny.

Your face burns hot with humiliation, and you can only muffle your embarassed moans into the fabric of the couch.

Naked and vulnerable, you're bent ass up and face down over Al-haitham's lap with his dominant hand knuckle deep in your wet pussy.

Maybe, just maybe you might've been able to handle this amicably, but not with Kaveh walking in and berating the Akademia Scribe turned Grand Sage on his pleasure skills.

With your ass held high and knees spread, your leaking cunt is on display for the genius architect while his roommate fingers you ruthlessly, constantly prodding and rubbing that special squishy spot inside you that renders you immobile.

"H-Hah.. mmngh! Ah..."

You can do nothing but take it and drool on the couch while they squabble above you as though you're not there.

"--Y-You brute! That's our beloved and you're treating them like that!?"

"I'd say our Creator quite likes it."

You stifle a screech when Al-haitham takes his other hand and spreads your ass open to prove his argument to Kaveh.

"See?" He takes out his fingers and spreads them apart, watching your hot slick string apart, "and here too." You sob loudly as he gently prods your pussy lips apart to stare down your red, throbbing clit.

Kaveh's face flushes at the lewd display, and he gulps while setting his suitcase down off to the side before approaching.

"A-And?"

"[name] has cum thrice already."

Kaveh's brow twitches, "Were you not going to clean them up?!"

Al-haitham huffs indifferently despite the miniscule tint of pink arousal across his cheeks, "I'll leave that to you."

The blond hmphs at him before cooing at you softly, praising you with your title and demeanour.

"Our beloved," He caresses your back, and you shiver pleasantly at the tingle it stimulates, "you've been so good, haven't you? Done so well..."

He hushes you gently as he moves closer behind you, kneeling at the couch's edge, face level with your puffy cunny. Al-haitham remains quiet this time around, his non-slick covered hand patting your head lovingly.

"It's okay~ I'll take good care of you now, I'll clean you up all nice, alright?"

You only whine when he sinks his tongue into your pussy, lapping up your spilled juices and nipping at your reddened bud. Your body trembles with an absentminded moan when he sucks on your sore little clit, and he emits a noise of suprise as a new abundance of syrup leaks from your opening.

Al-haitham quirks up a brow, "Four times, now."

"Mercy! M-Mercy..!" You cry out.

"Oh," Lisa tuts demeaningly, "no, no, no dear one~ You see, you didn't quite seem to believe our intentions true when we offered ourselves to you. So it only seems right that we prove it, yes?"

You can't squirm away from Eula's mouth, her strength baffling as she keeps you stood still against the Grand Master's desk with ease. Amber mouths at the mounds of your breasts, obessed with how soft the fat of them are.

You whimper loudly when Eula curls her two fingers into your front wall, clenching down on her and nearly screaming when she thrusts them into you punishingly.

Jean can't help but watch in stunned silence of you, your voice and body ethereal. She can't wait to get a taste of her own as you shudder and gasp.

It was bad enough when Venti had his way with you earlier under Vanessa's tree, simultaneously teasing you and giving you everything you wanted.

He ran his mouth with words that were both endearingly sweet and pure debauchery, controlling the winds to graze at your hardened nipples with ghost like touches that left you spasming and breathless.

He'd shown you his choice of belonging to you through the intimate thrusts of his hips and sloppy, loving kisses across your body--he'd then guided you back to the gates of Mondstadt with the help of the wind to keep you balanced.

You cry when a thin zap of purple shocks your pulsing clit, cumming instantly while Eula's tongue soothes over it with the help of her cryo ability. Your lewd honey drips down your leg and onto the floor, and the blue haired girl sneers at the waste of it.

A whimper escapes you when Amber nips at your soft tit a little too harshly, and she murmurs a timid apology, looking up at you reverently before continuing.

"P-Please..!" You hate how they've all been able to make you cry with pleasure, as though they always knew just what they were doing to you, "it..-it hurts now..! A-Aaahhh..."

You let out a long, breathy whine as you cum again, tears steaming down your cheeks as the gentle wave of bliss washes over you. You almost miss Acting Grand Master Jean calling for someone to enter after a knock on the door.

Humiliation of your state causes you to flush and shut your teary eyes as Kaeya walks in, gaze latching onto you immediately.

He closes the door behind him, humming lowly at the sight.

His eye glints in dirty interest, a grin creeping up his lips at the sound of your whimpers and sloppy cunt.

"Oh? It's our turn already?"

"Kaeya! You're just in time," Lisa grins mischieviously, "I believe our dearly beloved is ready for something... thicker, now." She smiles as though her filthy implication were a casual statement of time.

You hate being the centre of attention, but fuck does it feel good. You hate feeling so vulnerable, but good god do they take care of you.

Maybe, just maybe you could allow yourself to indulge in their affections...

Nope.

Hate. You hate, hate, hate, hate hate it.

You whimper quietly, head bowed to hide your face from the prying eyes of the others seated around you.

You're back in the lands of Inazuma, in the very same place you were last time the picnic was set up. It was much more lavish this time around, based in the early evening with a gorgeous ocean view, lights strung up in the trees and scattered atop a few stable rocks.

The blankets laid down were much thicker this time, and the pillows larger and fluffier. The sunset paints the horizon gold and pink which fades into a rich purple and, eventually, the glimmering darkness of night.

You sit in Zhongli's lap, a spare blanket covering your bare lower half as you squirm on his throbbing cock. You could feel his other drooling pre-cum against your lower back.

The others had been coaxing you to eat your share of the platter, Navia and Wriothesly feeding you small portions since you were too shy to do so yourself.

Though ashamed and bashful, you can't help but clench and throb, and you fluster when Zhongli lets out a small groan from behind you.

Navia places a comforting hand on your covered knee.

"Beloved Creator, are you alright?" Her voice is soft, loving.

You swallow sharply, shoulders hunched and tense nervously from those watching.

"Your Grace?" You glance over at Diluc who huffs with a small blush of his own, "we'll take care of you."

Your cunt throbs, and Zhongli thrusts into you.

You yelp at the sudden motion, straightening up instinctively to balance yourself only for your most devoted to thrust into you again, and again, and again. His arm wraps around your waist to keep you seated, and the blanket slowly slips from your lap from the movement.

"A-Ah! Zhon--aahhh!"

Squelch, plap, slap, his fat cock hits the textured roof of your squishy insides and sends an overwhelming shock of pleasure through you. Throwing your head back with a lewd moan, both your embarassment and arousal increase tenfold at the sight of your most shameless worshippers touching themselves at the sight of you.

Others swallow roughly, barely holding themselves back with a single thread of dignity. Those of them watch with eyes that burn your body into memory, and the intensity both frightens and arouses you.

The better of them murmur and coo praises at you, causing your stomach to flutter and your pussy to gush.

You pant loudly when Ayato softly intructs you to breathe, and you squeal when Tartaglia reachs out to play with your pretty clit while rubbing his neglected cock.

"Pl..ease..! Hah..!"

You feel a pair of lips on your neck and whine, whimpering shamefully when Neuvillette starts whispering sweet praise into your ear, sucking on your skin softly. You white knuckle the thick blanket by your forcefully opened legs and clench your eyes shut in humiliation.

Your cunny starts to tingle with sparks of pleasure that strike your overstimulated bundle of nerves, and you flush at the feeling of your sex juices trailing from your slit to your ass, soiling Zhongli's clothed lap and the pillows and fabric below.

"Hng! Cumming! AH!" You shriek, thrashing in their hold, "c-cumming! H-Help, 'm cumming-- oohhh~ Ohh~"

That weird prickly feeling coils in your tummy again, and you let out a lewd and bratty whine when they don't let up on their touching.

"S-Slow! PLEASE! F-Fuck! Feels funn-y~!"

When you slap at Childe's hand, your own are quickly restrained by Kazuha who simply smiles with red cheeks and mutters to you flowery reassurances.

The sound of your pussy is loud, it's noisy, and filthy. You emit a desperate, pleading wail, not knowing if your subconscious is trying to beg them to stop or to stay.

Saliva pools in your mouth then begins to hang open as your starry eyes roll into the back of your head, chest heaving.

Your thighs tremble and your fingers twitch--Kazuha intertwines them with his own, and you lock onto the comforting hold.

"G-Good!" You can't stop yourself from babbling, "m-makes me feel soOo goood~!"

"Oh, sweet one~" Yae Miko giggles.

"You understand that we choose you now, yes?" Ningguang hums with a teasing quip. Her eyes torn between your adorably lewd features and your swollen, glistening cunt.

"Relax, beloved. It's only us, your most faithful~"

"Mm, don't hold back, dearest."

"Can you moan for us, beloved? You sound just delicious when you moan!"

"Are you gonna cum for us?"

"It's not fair how they got a taste of you first~!"

"Hng..! A-ah, hah!"

"Oh-oh! Beloved, calm down, you're alright. Just let it happen.."

"Do you feel good, your Grace?"

"--c-cumming- cumming! Cumming..!"

A white hot blaze of heat crashes over you, and your ears ring as your body trembles in utter bliss. Your slick pussy squeezes and gushes with your lewd honey, and as your abused little pearl sears with an almost painful pleasure, your body squirts out your most powerful orgasm that soaks the blankets and the people surrounding.

Pleasure caused tears leave hot stains on your face, and your head lulls to the side tiredly. Your chest heaves for breath as you come down from your high, and it takes a few moments before the ringing finally stops and you can hear again.

Doting whispers and coos are the first thing you process, followed by something thick and hot leaking out of your stretched and now empty hole.

A hand caresses your head as many others touch on you innocently, checking in on you and taking care of you.

Someone holds a glass to your lips, and someone else helps you lean forwards to sip.

You startle at the feeling of a soft mouth coming to gingerly lick and suck at your sore pussy, and you let out a delirious whine.

Another acolyte hushes you gently, kissing you softly before another joins in peppering kisses all over your tired face to distract you from the one cleaning you up between your legs.

You still feel light headed from the embarassment of it all, but you've latched onto the pleasant tingling you feel when they look at you so adoringly--more lovingly than just in reverence.

No, actually.

You don't hate this at all.

[faerytreealtars]

What are your greatest gifts, and how can you use them to your best ability? - A timeless Pick-a-card ˚˖𓍢ִ໋🍃✧˚.💚⋆

Hello everyone!! Welcome to yet another reading that I hope will help you all in some form or another! ♡ If you're struggling to pick an image (though do know in the case of this reading you can always pick two or even all three!!) then I would suggest for you to close your eyes take three slow deep breaths and allow yourself to slowly open your eyes letting your eyes to be guided to what image draws your attention first. Then Hopefully you have picked your reading! Before we get into that I wish to thank all of you for the love and support you offered me in the last reading I posted! It trully meant a lot to me and it really does give me the courage to keep going and trying to do my best in what I love when I know it is helping others out too!! So Thank you!! ♡♡

[ Image Credits goes to the flower fairies ]

Pile One ~ [ Cards: Seven of Pentacles, Four of Wands & Death. Chariot - TOD ]

Your Greatest Gifts: In this lifetime you have been blessed with the gift of patience and understanding, how are these gifts I feel some saying aloud or in their heads well while the rest of the world may rush and panic thus acting recklessly you are able to fully savour and value each moment which in fact makes you more grateful for all you have and memories you keep are more joyous for it. I also feel through your patient and calm demeanour you actually find yourself reaching goals and triumphs faster than the so-called hares of the world, so I hear "Keep being the tortoise and enjoy the journey instead of worrying about when you'll reach the finish line"

[ Cards: Five of Wands, Queen of Pentacles, Page of Swords. Nine of Pentacles - TOD ]

How best to use them: I think the majority of you reading this pile already use your gifts for their greatest purpose and spirit/your higher self is proud of you but some further advice I am hearing is perhaps your calm, understanding and patient manner can be used better in situations of conflict and disagreement like a mediator, not at the sake of your own safety though I must warn but, I am definitely seeing you stepping into a role of leadership, whatever kind first entered your mind when reading that is what you are being suggested to follow next in life. Otherwise, I can see you need to share your thoughts and opinions more without fear because what you have to say does indeed matter in fact with the action of taking more of a forward confident role in your life I can see much abundance heading your way. I wish you luck Pile One and I thank you for taking the time to read this!! - Love, Fae.

Pile Two ~

[ Cards: Queen of Wands, Knight of swords, The Fool. The Empress - TOD ]

Your Greatest Gifts: I am strongly getting a divine feminine energy from this group, so if that resonates (and remember energy does not mean physical gender!!) then this is most certainly your pile. Without further ado, I see you have been blessed with a quick mind, courage and creativity. You, are able to, think wildly outside the box, coming up with ideas as fast as lighting a match you may love to put these ideas into writing or drawn form. I see you have worked hard to continue to share these ideas with courage in yourself even when others do not "vibe" with it. You know your creations and words aren't for everyone but you continue creating and knowing the right people will resonate and that is admirable!

[ Cards: Page of Cups, Five of Cups, Justice. Two of Cups - TOD ]

How Best to use them: Alright the cards took a long while to come out so I take that as a message that many of you already do use your gifts in the best way you can at the moment but for further advice for those who are struggling I can see that you needn't fear putting your emotion into your crafts that's what brings it to true life and thus it can really resonate with those who it is meant too. Never feel ashamed of your emotions, whether you class it a bad or a good emotion they all carry an important message in your body. I also see that perhaps you need to be more comfortable with letting go of ideas that are no longer working, don't be afraid of letting things go and moving on to the next but on the flip-side of that (and this message is for a lower majority) I see some of you struggle focusing on one idea at a time, the negative of having a very busy mind is that you can sometimes have more creative ideas than you can realistically handle be more particular on what ideas you choose to work on and bring into the world, you can write all the ideas you have down and settle on which ones sound like they would work best. That way you can have more success when you focus your energy more determinedly rather than feeling like it is constantly being scattered. Hope this reading is helpful to you all, my dear pile 2! I wish you luck and thank you, as well as your Guides/Guardians for letting me channel for you! - Love, Fae.

Pile Three ~ [ Cards: Two of wands, The high priestess, three of wands. The Sun - TOD ]

Your Greatest Gifts: We have a very mixed pile here so please only take what resonates, firstly I see you have a very strong connection to your intuition and/or psychic gifts. You are keenly aware of the spiritual and thus open to knowing what is in your best interest. I, of course, love that energy you have!! Otherwise, I also see you may have a more open mind than others can envision a world/life further away from what others deem as "safe" or "normal". What I mean by this as you are quick to overcome fears and stagnant energy that would usually trap others in a lower vibrational state and go forth into unknown places, both physical and mental which in turn further help you grow into a more wiser person. You can act and think in a way that is outside of the box and the norm. While this can make you the black sheep in most groups it is indeed a strength and please don't forget it!

[ Cards: The fool, queen of cups, knight of swords. Temperance - TOD ]

How best to use them: My advice for you in helping to use these gifts in a way that is best for you and others is easily said bur perhaps harder done still, you are capable. Please believe that! The advice is to stop fearing other's opinions and judgements just because they can not see as you do, In fact worrying over their lower opinions if I can be frank is a waste of time! Be more courageous in voicing your mind and the intuiton you hear, you are bestowed with this gift for a reason because you are worthy with a good heart. I would also ask that you please stop ignoring your emotions and acting like other people's emotions are more valid, stand up for yourself and your belief's. I would also advise you to stop letting others make you feel lesser for being a kinder and more compassionate soul, it can be hard in a world with many who only act in self-interest but your loving soul will help you find the right good people to share your life with. Focus on building a routine which allows you time to explore more spiritual activities and don't feel embarrassed or ashamed of this side of you, you are allowed to be interested and love what you do even if no one in your community can understand it. They don't stop liking the stuff they do even if you or others disagree with it so just be true to yourself. I've gone (and still sometimes do) through this energy and shift myself so I wish you luck pile 3 but I know your souls are strong and you can accomplish it brilliantly! - Love, Fae.

My Youtube - FaeryTreeAltars

My other Readings

[unsoundedcomic]

When exactly did "The Man" go into the khert and do all this stuff?

It's not relevant. While the creation of Sette and Jac (as a concept, with a set number of iterations) has some temporal relevance, the alteration to the khert was in execution an alteration to all of the world and humanity. The date of the alteration isn't important because the alteration altered the entire instantiation. It did not create a branching timeline. It replaced the timeline.

I feel it's important to be very loose with this stuff because I don't want a readership that's been following for 2000 pages to have to suddenly try to keep track of dates or alternate histories. I let Lady Ilganyag tell her story to Sette in very simple language with all the corners rounded off. That was for the reader, too. The mechanics are there - as far as I can tell they work just fine within this system - and we can talk about them here, if you want, but they're not really what I'd have a reader take away from this. What really gets my juices flowing is the idea of a human being getting into the gears of the world and thinking he can manifest his religion. It's a mega blown up version of Sette papering over her crappy trauma with make-believe.

And meanwhile this ancient harpie is over in the corner shuffling her talons and saying, uh, maybe don't, but no one's going to listen to her. She stands around watching the grass grow and thinks that's magical. Humans don't got time for natural selection!

I also really was charmed by the idea of someone making that giant change, carrying out this great humanitarian enterprise that he believed would evolve his peoples towards immortality, and then completely forgetting he did it because he boneheadedly also changed himself. And none of it even worked! It's a tragedy but also ridiculous but also kind of terrifying. He wrote over his original self. In trying to save everyone he loved and whose souls he wanted to see again, he obliterated all of them with new versions. Maybe some of them are identical, but it doesn't even matter. And he doesn't even know he did it. No one in existence even knows it ever happened but Lady Ilganyag.

It's spooky. But only if you think about it too hard.

[ladykailitha]

Sweet Home Indiana Part 9

Only one more chapter to go and that's the happily ever after.

Lot of talking in this chapter. Steve and Eddie, Eddie and Chrissy, Steve and Chrissy, back to Eddie and Steve. But we get to the most brilliant idea Eddie has had since choosing to marry Steve.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

****

The drive back to the hotel wasn’t a long one, but it still felt like it had passed by in a single instant.

When he pulled into the parking lot he was surprised to see Steve leaning against one of the pillars to the covered valet parking, smoking a cigarette. His feet were crossed at the ankle and his free hand was holding tightly to the arm that held his cigarette. His head was down, but Eddie could his hair wasn’t styled and his clothes were rumpled.

He got out his rental in a hurry and tried not to run up to Steve so it was this weird loping walk/jog thing.

“Baby?” Eddie called, leaning his head down to try and look him in the eyes.

“Eddie?”

His already broken heart shattered into dust when Steve raised his head. His eyes were red and swollen, his face blotchy with tears, and his expression was shuttered.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he cooed, cupping Steve’s cheek. “What are you doing here?” If Eddie was the cause of another shop closing, he was going to start crying, right there in the parking lot, dignity be damned. “What about the bakery?”

“Robin is taking care of it,” he murmured, “she called in Claudia to help out, the shop’s fine.”

Eddie heart sank further. “But you aren’t. Why don’t we go up to my room and we’ll talk about it, okay?” When Steve didn’t say anything, Eddie backtracked. “Or we can go somewhere else if you prefer.”

Steve shook his head. “No, no. You’re hotel room is fine.”

Eddie wrapped his arms around him and led him to his room. He sat Steve down on the one armchair in the room and poured a glass of water. He got out two capsules of ibuprofen and handed both to Steve.

“Drink up, Stevie,” he gently implored. “Don’t want you getting a migraine because you’re dehydrated.”

Steve nodded and did as he was told. Once he was done, he handed the cup back to Eddie who set it on the table.

“I was making snickerdoodles and started crying and couldn’t stop,” Steve murmured. “I know I’ve been awful to you all week and I’m starting to feel like that stupid Einstein quote or whatever about being crazy.”

Eddie chuckled and ran his fingers through Steve’s hair. “Crazy is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result?”

Steve nodded and then leaned into Eddie’s touch. “I’ve missed you so much, Eds.”

Eddie knelt in front of him and kissed his forehead. Steve let out a shuddering breath as the sobs threatened to choke him.

“What did you do to me that I didn’t deserve, Stevie?” Eddie whispered. “I left you, kept running when I could have come home, demanded a divorce, came to town and shook up your life and was just going to blow out of it again, never to be seen again? After all that, what did you do to me that wasn’t in self-defense?”

Steve let out another shuddering breath. “Kevin is just a pool buddy. We aren’t dating. I haven’t dated since before you. I couldn’t. You’re everything to me and I don’t know what I did to make you hate me.”

Eddie frowned at the name before he realized it was the guy he saw flirting with Steve his first night in town.

“I don’t hate you, baby,” he murmured. “I never hated you. I was so scared that I would be stuck in this hick town my whole life. I wanted to see the world. I wanted to meet new people, but I never stopped loving you.”

“But Chrissy?” Steve asked, tears slipping down his cheeks. Eddie right there with him with his own tears.

“She needs a visa to stay in America,” Eddie said his voice shaking with each word he forced past his lips, “and if we don’t get married by a certain date, they’ll ship her off back to Barbados. She’s my Robin, Stevie. She’s my Robin.”

Steve’s eyes went wide as he gasped. There wasn’t anything in the world that he wouldn’t do for Robin, even a lavender marriage if that’s what it would take to keep her safe.

“Oh.”

Steve threw himself at Eddie and pulled him in for a big hug. “Oh, sunshine,” he breathed. “That’s horrible. Of course you need to marry her, to keep her safe. I’m sorry you’ve been carrying this around like a millstone around your neck.”

“I’m sorry, Stevie,” Eddie wailed. “I am so sorry.”

They slunk to the floor in a crumpled heap as they cried together.

Later they would get on the bed and just hold each other. But for now, they cried in each other’s arms and held on for dear life.

****

Eddie woke up for the first time in years feeling well rested and comfortable. His phone was also blasting “Hot Blooded Woman” as loud as possible.

He rolled over to grab his phone but was met with a warm body and face full of honey colored hair.

Eddie smiled and stretched over Steve to grab his phone.

“‘Ello?” he muttered, trying to keep his voice down.

“Eddie!” Chrissy shrieked. “I’ve been calling for the last ten minutes! Why didn’t you pick up?”

Eddie pulled his phone from his ear and stuck a finger in it to clear it out. “Chrissy, not so loud.”

“Well, I’m sorry if I’m freaking out that you weren’t answering your phone, Edward,” she huffed.

Eddie slid out of the bed and grabbed the room key on his way out of the hotel room. “I was sleeping, Christine. I’ve had a very emotionally wrought day and was exhausted.”

There was silence on the line for a moment or two before he got a very chastised, “Oh.”

“I’m sorry, Ed,” she murmured. “I was having my own freak out and completely forgot about yours. That was fucked up, I’m really, really sorry.”

Eddie sighed and leaned against the door. “It is what it is. Why were you calling?”

“Um...” she hedged. “It doesn’t sound so dire in weight of your shit, so...”

He chuckled and shook his head. “Now you’ve got to tell me.”

“So, um...” she hedged a little more, “I called the bakery to see if I could talk to Steve and see if we could work out custody of you or whatever, but he was busy.”

“Snickerdoodles.”

“Yes!” Chrissy hissed. “Wait! How did you know?”

“Steve came to the hotel to see me,” Eddie explained, “and told me he had been making snickerdoodles when it just came over him that he just had to see me.”

“Cute,” she said and Eddie could see her tilt her head to the side in his mind, something she’d picked up from him. “Anyway! I’ll talk more about that in a minute. I need to freak out.”

Eddie shook his head fondly. “Continue.”

“So this really cute sounding girl picked up and wouldn’t let me talk to him because apparently their giant stand mixer eats phones!” Chrissy explained.

“Let me guess, you’re freaking out about the cute sounding girl?” he murmured.

“Is–is she Steve’s girlfriend?” she asked shyly.

Eddie burst out laughing. He laughed so hard that Steve opened the door and looked down at him. “You okay there, Eds?”

He nodded, pursing his lips together. “Would please explain to Chrissy that Robin isn’t your girlfriend, please? Please?”

Steve rolled his eyes but took the phone from Eddie’s grasp.

“Hi, Chrissy?” he greeted.

“You must be Steve!” she chirped happily. “Nice to meet you at long last!”

“Likewise,” he said fondly. “Robin Buckley is my partner in a lot of things, but as a staunch lesbian, she isn’t anything but my platonic soulmate.”

He pulled the phone from his ear as she shrieked. Eddie looked up at him with the biggest grin and made grabby hands for his phone. Steve handed it back.

“Oh my god!” Chrissy cried. “If I wasn’t set to marry you, I propose in a heart beat!”

“I never took you for a U-haul lesbian,” he teased her.

Suddenly everyone stopped stock still.

“Oh shit,” Eddie said scrambling to his feet. “That’s it!”

“I’m calling Robin!” Steve cried, diving back into the hotel room.

“Get on a plane, darlin’,” Eddie told Chrissy. “I think we just solved all our problems.”

“Eddie...” Chrissy breathed. “Do you think this will work? What if she says no?”

“She won’t,” he reassured her. “And even if she doesn’t agree today, she will once she meets you face to face.”

“This is insane, Ed,” she muttered. “I don’t know.”

“Babe,” Eddie breathed. “Jeff is already out here for his parents’ wedding anniversary. Brian lives in Indy, and I bet I could convince Gare to be on a flight faster than you can book your own flight. You’ve already told the immigration lady that you were coming down here to the wedding anyway.”

She sighed and took a deep breath. “Okay, but now I’m freaking out for a different reason.”

Eddie laughed. “Because now you’ve got meet the pretty girl on the phone?”

“And is she?” Chrissy asked. “Is she pretty?”

Eddie went searching through his phone for the pictures he took during his week here and found a good one of Robin and Steve at the bar. He sent it to her.

“Stevie is hottie on the right,” he told her, “and Robin is cutie on the left.”

There was silence on the line for a few moments before Chrissy breathed. “Right, two things. One, I think you’re an even bigger asshole for leaving that behind, by the way.”

Eddie bobbed his head side to side. “Yeah, that’s fair.”

“And two holy fuck,” she hissed. “I would go down on my knees begging her to marry me even if my immigration status wasn’t the fucking sword of Damocles hanging over my head, right now.”

“Someone packing her bags yet?” he teased her.

“Look, babe,” Chrissy said seriously. “I was already packing my bags to meet your scaly white ass out there in Bumfuck, Indiana, it’s just going to be a more enjoyable experience is all.”

“See you soon, Chris.”

“I’ll message you my flight details as soon as I get them.”

“Right-o,” he said and hung up.

The door to the hotel room opened up again and Steve leaned against the doorframe.

“Robin thinks it’s a great idea,” he said softly. “One of her schools was already out there in Washington, so this makes the choice easier. Plus, this means she won’t be alone in the city like she thought she would be.”

Eddie got to his feet and put his arms around Steve’s waist. “This only clears up seventy percent of the problem.”

Steve frowned and tilted his head to the side. “What do you mean?”

Eddie cupped his jaw tenderly. “I still have a life out in Seattle. I want to be here with you, but there is so much to do before that could happen.”

Steve draped his arms around Eddie’s neck loosely. “I know that, Eds. I wasn’t expecting a miracle cure. So the only thing I need to hear from you is that no matter how far apart we are, that you’ll still love me.”

Eddie pulled him in for a hug and they stood there, half in the hotel room and half in the hall, just taking comfort in each other.

“I promise you this, Stevie,” he whispered in his ear, “that I will move heaven and earth to find my back to you. Something I should have done a long time ago.”

Steve shook his head. “No, I think we both needed to grow up before we could properly be together.”

Eddie let out a contented sigh. “Yeah, I think you’re right.”

Steve pulled him back inside the hotel room and Eddie closed the door behind him.

****

1- @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @ravenfrog @zerokrox-blog

2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @goodolefashionedloverboi

3- @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog @irregular-child @mac-attack19

4- @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1

5- @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt

6- @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95

7- @blackpanzy @amazing-spiderkeys @oldpinghai @raisedbylibrarians @kultiras

8- @swimmingbirdrunningrock @steddie-as-they-go @captain--low @micheledawn1975 @thespaceantwhowrites

9- @blondie1006 @stripey82 @w1ll0wtr33 @mcenziehughes

[thegoldencontracts]

I genuinely never have a clue what to ask for anything because my brain blanks out when i get into the ask box

Uhm, i really liked the tsundere twist idea you were talking about in that one post. It's very fun and silly. I'm also intrigued by how Kalim would be written in this, how the most vocally hype one would get relatively quiet and not as open with his crush. Azul feels like he fits in really seemingly tbh though i think that goes with majority of em lol (NRC isn't really good at being genuine haha)

It just seems so fun and cute but also strangely fitting 😆

Tyyy for the request! Yeah, Kalim's approach in a tsundere! Au is definitely the most interesting to explore!

Love?

Summary: Kalim doesn't really know why you make him feel this way. It's probably nothing... Right?

Notes: Tsundere!Kalim is fun precisely because of the careful balance with his character imo

Kalim had to admit, the way he talked to you was- different, to say the least, from the way he talked to others. It wasn't a big deal though, really! He was just- a bit awkward with you, because you had no magic, and it felt weird.

Kalim really wasn't the best person to like someone. He'd be a terrible boyfriend anyways, after all, there was a reason everyone back home secretly hated him, even most of his siblings, even Jamil-

Hahaha. Wow, Kalim was really great at making humor out of hyperboles! Weren't those two big words? Jamil would be so shocked to see him use them!

Too bad Jamil wasn't here right now. Just you. You, looking at him in shock as he handed you that trinket you'd been eyeing for a while now.

"Kalim," you said, eyes widened in shock. "This is-"

Stupid. That was what you were about to say, right? Kalim was wasting his time, giving a stupid gift no one cared about. He was probably being so overbearing right now.

"Ah, sorry!" He said. "I just give these gifts to most people, you know? Sorry if you minded, I didn't mean to make it seem like I liked you or anything weird like that!"

You tilted your head in confusion.

"You sure?" You asked. He hastily nodded.

"Yep!" He said. Your brows furrowed.

"I- thought this was part of that one courting ritual-"

"O-Oh, jeez, silly me!" He said. "I forget about that stuff all the time, you know? I have no clue how Jamil deals with having to remind me!"

He really didn't.

"Alright then," you said, looking two seconds away from bursting into giggles. Did Kalim say something stupid he hadn't realized he said? Oops.

"U-Uh, bye then!" He said. "I'll see you later, friend- acquaintance l- Prefect!"

Jeez, he really was bad at this whole 'love' thing, wasn't he?

[samandcolbyownme]

another one of my fav things u write is when the chat goes crazy so I was wondering if u could do one where y/n and Sam haven’t done a video in a while and the fans create rumors saying that they aren’t friends anymore but they’re secretly saying and Sam surprises the viewers on his live with reader and the chat goes crazy I love when u include that k byeee

I Found Her | Sam Golbach

Warnings: fluff, swearing, slight sexual innuendos, secret relationship (kept from fanbase), rumors about reader

I’m classifying this as a snippet for now.

“Sam.”

“Yeah, baby?” He looks up from his laptop as you walk down the steps, “Did you know that we aren’t friends anymore?”

“I mean..” he turns to look back at you, “Yeah, I kind of did know that.” He chuckles and you walk around to sit on the couch next to him, “Well yeah, but I mean.. here.”

You rest your head on his shoulder and he gives the top a kiss as you smile, “Here.” You hand him your phone, “There’s a thread on this one.”

You reach over, tapping the comment to drop more down, “Then I’ll show you the other comment section on TikTok.”

User1: Has she posted anywhere recently?

User2: right! It’s been almost three months

User3: Has Sam posted anything with her? Commented on anything?

User4: maybe she moved back home? Her and Sam might have split?

User5: @/user4: her and Sam were NEVER together! She’s an old friend from their childhood! Stop spreading false information!

User6: Literally stop. I’m sure y/n is fine!

He nods as he reads down over them, “They have no idea.” He looks over at you, “Is it because you M.I.A on them?”

“Probably. I just deleted the apps off my phone once we started getting, closer, you know.. I wanted to put my all into this, so I figured a social media break would be good.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone. You know that right? You do what you need to do in order to make yourself happy.” Sam leans in, pressing a kiss to your cheek, “Because they clearly have no idea what they’re talking about.”

You press a kiss to his lips, “As long as I have you, I should be set on happiness.” You smile and he kisses you again, “Maybe we should just come clean.”

“You want to tell them?” You ask as you raise your brows.

“Only if you want to.” Sam whispers, tucking hair behind your ear as you nod, “I need to start posting again anyway.” You let out a sigh, “Okay. How do you want to do it?”

Sam smirks, “I have an idea.”

“Oh no.” You laugh, “Should I be scared?”

He shakes his head, “Just go up and hang out in my room. I’m going to go live. Is Colby awake?” You stand up and shrug, “Not sure, I did hear anything before I came down.”

He nods and stands up, “Okay.” His hands slide up your arms, “Are you sure about this? If you’re not co-“

“I want to be able to kiss you in public and hold your hand. I’m sure about this, baby.” You look up at him and he smiles, “Okay. Now go.”

You nod and walk over to the steps, looking back to see he’s staring at you shaking his head.

“What?” You stop, tuning towards him as you laugh slightly and he shakes his head, “I just.. cannot believe you are mine.”

You smile harder, feeling your cheeks heat up as you finish your way up the steps. You go into the room you share with Sam, sitting on the bed as you wait for whatever’s about to happen, to happen.

A few minutes later, you see a notification on your phone.

[y/n.y/l/n]: samgolbach started a live video. Watch it before it ends!

“Oh my god.” You look at the door, then back to your phone, then one more back and fourth before you get up and walk out of the room.

You sit down on the floor, listening as you hear Sam start, “What’s up everybody? Hello hello.” He pauses, “Just going to wait for a couple more people to drop in before we get started.”

You knew the comments were insane. Sam hasn’t done a solo live in so long.

“Fuck it.” You get up, walking back in and you click on the notification, popping in while Sam is mid sentence, “.. on here and give you guys a little update about Colby and I’s travels lately.”

He smiles when he sees your name pop up, but he tries to not make it a big deal, “So we flew in from Italy, I think it was two days ago now? But that was amazing. That video will be out soon.”

While Sam is talking, you can’t help but stay focused on the comments, scrolling at you read. At first it was comments about Sam and Colby and their videos and stuff, but as soon as you joined, the focus was practically almost turned, which is what Sam wanted.

InstaUser1: WAIT WAIT Y/N DID I SEE THAT CORRECTLY!?

InstaUser2: Can’t wait for the video Sam!!

InstaUser3: @/InstaUser1 I SAW IT TOO!

InstaUser4: wait wait wait y/n is here?

InstaUser5: Sam! Please just tell us if y/n is okay!

“Y/n is okay. We’re still on good terms, I promise.” He glances at the camera, “Yeah, I see everything.” He laughs, shaking his head, “No she’s doing good.”

You laugh slightly, glancing back down to the comments.

InstaUser6: NO what do you MEAN you see everything Samuel?

InstaUser7: PLEASE GOD NO Sam don’t lurk you’ll regret it, just ask Matt Sturniolo

“Colby is sleeping still. I think he’s coming down with something, which means I’ll probably get it.”

“And I’ll end up getting it.” You mumble to yourself.

InstaUser8: Can you tell us where y/n is? Like did she go back home?

InstaUser9: Why did she ghost us? You’re a GHOST HUNTER, Sam! Please help us out!

“I need to go get Colby up anyway. We have a dinner tonight and I haaaate waking his ass up.”

Your heart starts racing as you see Sam walking in the live, “Oh fuck.” You shift around, leaning back against the headboard as you try to look relaxed and like you aren’t panicking on the inside.

You knew he had to get Colby up, but you knew he had unfinished business that he had to attend to first, “Here guys.” He flips the camera around and you watch the screen intently as he reaches for the knob, “Say hi to Colby.”

He pushes open the door and you’re suddenly watching yourself on your phone screen, “Just kidding. It’s y/n! I found her!”

You turn your head from your phone to look at Sam, “You found me!”

“Ghost Hunter Sam strikes again.” Sam says as he walks over to sit on the bed. You laugh, looking back down at the comments.

InstaUser1: I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT

InstaUser8: Oh my god this is so much better

InstaUser10: PLEASE WHAT IS HAPPENING

You lean over, resting your head on Sam’s shoulder, “I took some sudden time off because, well.. something sudden, but not so sudden happened and I just wanted to give it my all, you know?”

Your eyes scan down as the comments flood through on Sam’s screen.

InstaUser11: PLEASE BE TOGETHER.

InstaUser12: IM SOBBING WHAT

InstaUser13: MY TWO FAV PEOPLE WHAT IS GOING ON I-

You laugh, “I guess we should just-“ Sam cuts you off with a kiss and you lay your hand on his cheek, smiling as he pulls away.

“That’s my girlfriend.” Sam laughs as he rests his forehead against your temple, “Alright guys.” He turns his head, keeping it against yours, “I’ll see you all in the next one. I gotta go wake up Colby. Love you all. Catch ya later.”

You smile as Sam ends the live and then he suddenly turn, lunging to push you back onto the bed, “You can come to dinner with us tonight.”

“I sure can, boyfriend.” You scrunch your nose up as you smile and he leans in, “I love you, y/n.”

Your heart skips a beat and you bring your hand up to lay on his neck, “I love you, Sam.” He presses a few kisses to your face before attacking your lips.

He leans back with a sigh, “Wanna help me get Colby up?” You purse your lips together and shake your head, “I have to start getting ready.”

He rolls his eyes before smiling, “Fine, I’ll let it slide.” You go to get up but he stops you, “This time.” You laugh and shake your head, “Mhm. I’m sure I’ll hear that next time, too.”

“Yeah.” Sam nods, “You probably will.” His eyes scan over your body, “So which dress are you wearing?” You bite down on your lip as you glance over at him, “One that’s easy for you to take off of me once we’re back here.”

“Fuck, I love you.”

——

Thank you so much for reading!! I love you all so much!

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[luvgavii]

not so strangers anymore.

summary: part two of 'the stranger in the airport' ;)

disclaimer: i was too lazy (and excited) to write in capital letters, hope that doesn't bother you too much, also, this is my first fic after a very long break, so excuse me if i'm a bit rusty, i promise i will get better :') enjoy <3

of course, during your whole vacation visiting your parents and friends in your hometown, you were now talking to the one and only, pablo gavi.

when he first texted you, which was basically as soon as your plane landed, you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed, you were just a normal girl, who had her hobbies, and now suddenly you were being dmed by gavi, you knew what it would be like being involved with someone as well known and popular amongst girls, and you knew it would only take the press a few days to hunt you down, let alone when you'd be back in barcelona.

but, with gavi's natural charm, he had you giggling at his texts in one day. he knew just what to say to get you to giggle and kick your feet at his words.

yourusername: you say stuff like this to every girl you meet?

pablogavi: only to the cute one's that i meet at the airport and have no idea who i am :)

after returning to barcelona, you two met up as soon as his schedule allowed him to, and while you were nervous you two wouldn't have the same connection like you did over text, that feeling quickly vanished when you saw he was no different. he still made you laugh and giggle, of course, blush too.

you were friends for a few weeks, hanging out at eachothers houses, you slowly started developing your influencer status, your get ready with me's already being all over tiktok. gavi was there to see you blow up, and he couldn't be more proud.

"people love hearing you talk in your tiktoks," he said while casually laying his arm around your shoulder as you two sat on the couch, talking about you blowing up overnight , "i love listening to you talk", he added, almost shyly, his accent adorable.

the weeks turned into months, and you two grew closer and closer, to the point where you would go watch his matches and cheer him on with the other wags, or where he would attend one of your influencer events. you would spend your friday nights together, scrolling through tiktoks people made about your now very speculated relationship.

while it was clear to both of you that there were feelings getting involved, neither of you knew how to have the talk. mainly because you waited for gavi to make the first move, and gavi didn't know how to make it. well, until he did.

yourusername: i really need a ride home, had an event at the ** art gallery, pick me up, pabs?

pabs. how could such a plain nickname, ignite such deep feelings inside of him?

pablogavi: on my way, stay there. ❤️

safe to say that nothing was the same after that night. he held you in his arms, didn't take his beautiful, brown eyes off yours for a minute, while hentold you everything he was bottling up these past few months, since you met.

he kissed you, a kiss so tender yet so passionate you swore you felt dizzy when you pulled apart, but that wasn't enough for pablo, he kissed you again, and again, and again. you two were definitely not strangers anymore.

[aerithisms]

i think my problem with this dw season arc accusing the audience of fanbrain for theorising about ruby is that it both feels deceitful and isn't actually that compelling from a character perspective. the season goes out of its way to build up supernatural mystery around ruby and even invokes susan more heavily than ever before in a way that is deliberately trying to get the audience to make those connections. and then it turns around and says you stupid idiot why would you ever try to connect these dots i have deliberately tried to get you to connect.

building up a mystery only for the character to be ordinary is an impossible girl arc redux only this time accusing the viewer of failing to see the humanity of the companion, whereas the impossible girl arc was turning that accusation on the doctor. 7b didn't really blame the audience for viewing clara as a puzzle and in fact several times spells out the fact that clara is perfectly ordinary before the big reveal to give the audience a chance to catch on. as 7b goes on, instead of laying the mystery on thicker, the audience just gets more and more affirmations that clara is a normal human being (rings of akhaten, journey to the centre of the tardis, hide). i found this approach compelling because it was rooted in character, focusing on the doctor's disconnection from humanity/the gendered dynamic of a man treating a woman as his manic pixie mystery to pull him out of grief. s14's meta approach of accusing the viewer feels both unfair, given it has deliberately led the viewer towards theorising, and personally less compelling to me because it wasn't tied into character in any way.

the thing about rey's parentage in tlj is that the reason rian johnson chose to go for that reveal was that it was the only answer that was interesting. none of the theories - rey is a skywalker, rey is a kenobi, and even the eventually canonical rey is a palpatine - were interesting or satisfying because they brought nothing compelling to the table for the story being told. the only satisfaction to be gained from those answers was a fanbrained "omg rey is important because she's related to that guy from the other movie." on top of that, rey desperately wants her parents to have been important, to give her life and her abandonment some kind of significance. so them being ordinary provided the most compelling trajectory for her character because it was the thing she least wanted to hear. it forced her to do the most introspection and growth, as well as tying into the film's themes about the capacity of ordinary people to be special. it wasn't just a choice made to "gotcha" the viewer, it was rooted in character.

i don't think ruby's mother being ordinary accomplishes the same thing. by invoking susan, s14 is engaging with the most egregious example of the doctor's streak of abandonment, which has potential to be very compelling in relation to ruby (and now also the doctor's) own abandonment issues. theories that ruby might be susan, or be somehow related to susan, or somehow related to the doctor, weren't just fanbrained "omg she's related to that guy i know from the classic series." they were theories genuinely rooted in character and the potential to explore both the doctor and ruby's issues with abandonment. and this is something the show willingly led fans towards by invoking susan so much in the first place. so for the show to turn around and act like they were shallow out of nowhere ideas when they were not shallow and were based on potential character conflicts the show itself deliberately invoked, feels misguided.

as well as that, ruby's mother being ordinary does not require that same growth from ruby as it did for rey because it is exactly what ruby wanted to hear. she never wanted her mother to be important, she just wanted to know who her mother was and have a connection with her. so finding out she was a normal woman who still loves her and wants to be a part of her life is everything she's ever wanted. it doesn't introduce interesting conflict for her the way rey's parents being ordinary did for her, because they were written as different characters with different hangups over their abandonment.

tl;dr i don't necessarily dislike ruby's mother being ordinary as an idea but compared to the things it was inspired by - 7b and star wars - it is not nearly as compelling in terms of how it relates to the characters or themes. and the meta angle, while conceptually interesting, doesn't quite work for me because it feels a little manipulative of the audience.

[restlesspazzi04]

here are scraps from chapter 6 + explanations on why they were scrapped!

Scene 1

This was a deleted section from the conversation with Paige and Michael:

Michael just nods in response, letting Paige continue. “I think I’m in love with Azzi.” The verbalization shocks both of them as the words slip out of Paige’s mouth. “And I don’t think she loves me back,” Paige slurs out, hugging her knees for comfort. 

“What makes you think that?” Michael asks a little quieter this time. 

“I just don’t think she sees me like that. I can’t really explain it.” 

Michael hums lowly, continuing to listen. 

“I’m not good enough for her,” Paige pauses for a moment before continuing, “And I don’t think I ever will be.” 

“I think you’re being harsh on yourself.” Michael chimes in finally, “You should talk to Azzi about this. I think you would be surprised at what she has to say.”

“And ruin my relationship with my best friend? No way.” Paige scoffs, “Plus, I can’t give Azzi what she wants… or what she deserves. It wouldn’t be a good idea to tell her.” 

“But are you happy with what you are to her? Are you happy seeing her with other people?”

The question made Paige stop and think. Was she happy? When Azzi had told her about the girl she had hooked up with, Paige had gone on a mini-rampage, finding random girls to sleep with every chance she had. She had chalked it up to being in college and an unlimited population of girls who wanted her (which was true still), but she would be lying if she said Azzi hooking up with someone else didn’t influence her choices. It had hurt her more than she anticipated and that hurt terrified her. 

“It doesn’t matter what I feel. I can’t lose her. If I told her right now then we would have to date. And if we dated that means we would break up. And if we broke up, well- well then our friendship would be over and I don’t know if I can handle that.” 

“Why would you have to break up? You’re dooming a relationship before it even starts. What’s the point of that?” 

Paige shakes her head, “I’m not dooming anything, I’m just being realistic.”

“Or you’re projecting your commitment issues.” Michael cuts in quickly, causing Paige to have a mildly offended look on her face. 

“I do not have commitment issues!” Paige exclaims. 

-

Explanation:

I didn't want Paige's first verbalization of loving azzi to be in this chapter (aka want it to be a bigger moment)

I thought the outward mention of her commitment issues was too cliche and scrapped that

just not well written and flowed awkwardly to me idk

Scene 2

This scene jumped from multiple places such as the beginning on the basketball court and the bathroom scene at the party:

“We would get to spend three years playing together, that’s one.” Paige says, counting off her fingers, “We would get to hang out at any time, go to bars together, and just have more freedom. I mean I love Katie and Tim, and my parents are good about letting us sleep over, but let’s be honest we always have to end shit early, and that’s just two. I got like three more.”

Paige takes a step closer to Azzi, in her face now. 

“Three, we would be teammates and you know how well we worked together in Team USA. We are like Curry and Thompson. See? I even used an NBA player you knew. That’s just how well I know you.” Paige says with a shit-eating grin on her face, warranting a tiny shove from the brunette. 

“Four, I want you to meet my friends. I just know you would get along with everyone. Why would I not want the best team for you? And you would love Geno. He’s a tough coach and I know you like that.” Paige just smiles, resting both her arms on Azzi’s shoulders. 

“And five?” Azzi asks a bit quieter when Paige doesn’t respond for a moment, just staring at the younger girl with a flirty smile.

“We could be as loud as we want,” Paige says while maintaining eye contact, only breaking it once to glance down at Azzi’s lips. 

“Oh yeah? Is that why you want me to come? I didn’t realize my Mom telling us to quiet down while playing Fortnite was so annoying. I’ll ask her to back off.” Azzi says while feigning innocence, not wanting to play whatever game Paige was playing.

“Yeah, it gets really annoying when our hangouts get interrupted. I mean we’re just two girls tryna have fun, what crime are we committing by laughing too hard?” Paige says, playing along with Azzi. 

“I guess I just have to come so we can laugh into the night together,” Azzi says while leaning in for a kiss. 

Explanation:

it lowkey killed me to take this out because i liked the way i wrote it but i just didn't have a use for it

kinda forward and i wanted paige's reasons for wanting azzi to come to uconn to be less superficial? if that makes sense

her actual list will be revealed later in the fic

Scene 3

This was the original ending to the fic, i just didn't like it that much:

“Do you remember that party we went to before you committed when I asked you to narrow down to two schools?”

Azzi looks at her, confused, “What does that have to do anything?” “Just trust me. Do you remember that night?” Paige says, still unsure of where she is going herself. 

“Yes, you were being an asshole… what does that have to do with anything?” 

“I made of list of every single reason I wanted you to come to UCONN, but I never told you because I was too scared to tell you how I felt.” 

Azzi looks back curiously now, wanting to know more.

“And I thought about sending you that list every single day leading up to your commitment because it was driving me insane"  

“But I realize now, that I can’t do this anymore with you. I can’t sit and hold back every single time we talk about something serious because it’s been years of this back-and-forth and it’s driving me insane.” Paige pauses for a moment before continuing, “I’m not going to tell you what to do because that’s up to you to decide. But if you're genuinely asking me if I think you should get married to Ben, I'm going to say no."

Explanation:

I initially wrote this with the intention of this being the moment Paige tells Azzi she shouldn't get married, but it felt way to premature and i just didn't like the level of impact it would've had to the plot

I didn't like most of the wording

too much blatant flashbacking, felt unnatural

this is a slow burn and this would simply be too much progression when it hasn't even been a full 24 hours of them being resolved friends again (aka wtf was i thinking)

And that is the totality of the deleted scenes i will be sharing thank you for reading :)

also if you've made it to the end, i have a one shot coming out soon on tumblr so watch out for that !

[rosenotactuallyquartz]

Here is a Pearlrose question that I find tricky. Why do you think Garnet seemed to not care that Pearl was upset but helped Greg in We Need To Talk? I've had people tell me that she was purposefully pulling Rose away from Pearl because she believed they were so unhealthy together (1)

(the asker goes on to say: “But I preffer the opposite take: that Garnet was actually so clear on Rose's love for Pearl that she did NOT actually realize Pearl was doubting It/ insecure. To her Greg and Rose becoming closer would just add to Rose's life, she had no idea Pearl could feel replaced because It was obvious to her that that was not the case)

oh i know exactly what you’re talking about, i’ve seen this before. i can’t wait to talk about it !

—

how garnet felt about rose’s bond with pearl

first off, i think it’s incredibly important to understand how garnet perceived rose.

“We never questioned ourselves, or her!” — Sapphire, Now We’re Only Falling Apart

“She had to. The Earth belonged to Pink Diamond. Destroying her was the only way to save the planet. For Amethyst to be herself, for Pearl to be free, for me to be together. For you to exist.” — Garnet, Bubbled

during the war, there were two opportunities in which rose could have harmed her. instead she accepted her; she helped her start a new life on earth with the other crystal gems.

of course she trusted all of rose’s choices—not only did she meet her as a leader, protecting garnet was the first choice that garnet ever saw rose make. she also witnessed rose make this decision within the first few seconds of garnet’s existence.

considering that garnet trusted rose and every choice she made (and everything she did during a war) garnet would absolutely trust rose to make her own decisions about her personal, intimate relationships thousands of years later.

sapphire confirms that garnet never questioned rose at all throughout the time she knew her. she felt comfortable as herself and she trusted that, if rose had a problem, especially a personal problem, she would handle that.

garnet was also aware of the fact that there was a lot she didn’t know about their relationship.

“And there they were: Rose Quartz, the leader of the rebellion, and her terrifying renegade Pearl.” — Garnet, The Answer.

during the war, pearl was rose’s second-in-command and confidant. considering that only pearl knew rose was pink diamond, and she hadn’t been rose for long, they definitely had periods of time where they’d disappear for awhile.

in rose’s scabbard, we discovered that rose had a secret armory location that only pearl knew about. later on, when she found out about rose’s lion and garnet mentioned that “rose kept many secrets, even from us” (which could have very well meant her & amethyst) she didn’t hesitate or protest when pearl replied with, “but not from me.” when amethyst yelled, “you’re not the only one who misses her!” that was the only moment where garnet looked taken aback.

garnet would never try to pull two of her friends away from each other, especially knowing that they kept a lot of things private.

since they did—she would also understand that any issues that they had, they’d most likely be solving on their own and behind closed doors.

there was no logical reason for her to judge the relationship, or believe another relationship is “better.”

garnet was also able to see pearl + rose for what they always believed in; what their dynamic was all about. they were always rebels, they didn’t see gems or life on earth the way that homeworld did.

(she likely heard rose refer to pearl as “my pearl” a few times throughout the war and later on as they lived together. i think that early on, garnet had a positive impression of the relationship)

garnet also related to pearl and rose’s relationship. a lot.

“That’s just how I felt when I came here with Ruby.” — Sapphire, Now We’re Only Falling Apart.

in homeworld, sapphire was described as being a “rare, aristocratic” gem. rubies were considered inferior and they are “for” the sapphires, to protect them.

however, when ruby accidentally bumped into sapphire, she spoke to ruby with respect and warmth. she was different from homeworld; she thought differently. she also made small talk, and the first thing ruby learned about sapphire as an individual was that she wished she could see more of the earth.

on the battlefield, ruby and sapphire ended up being the last two out of the group they originally had. sapphire was about to be harmed, but ruby saved her at the very last moment.

she prioritized protecting sapphire over logic, over consequence, over her own life.

so, of course, garnet understood pearl.

“Back during the war, Pearl took pride in risking her destruction for another. She put Rose Quartz over everything: Over logic, over consequence, over her own life.” — Sworn to the Sword

at a time when ruby didn’t expect to escape from homeworld, sapphire ran away and took ruby with her. she was able to explore the earth just like she wanted to, and she did this with ruby.

meanwhile, pearl and rose nearly fused for the first time and had a conversation about their feelings for each other. while sapphire had a moment where she was frozen, rose was frozen in her own way, too.

everything was very new to her, and even a bit overwhelming, in a positive way. homeworld had rules on how to interact with each gem and what to feel. on earth, rose found that she was completely in awe of pearl. she admired her, she would blush because of her. pearl would argue with rose (a diamond) because she wanted to protect her in every way that she could, even when rose told her not to because she cared about pearl. they saw each other as unique, flawed individuals and it felt so natural and right.

so, why question it? the only reason it’s perplexing is because of homeworld’s guilting and disapproval.

“Please don’t ever stop!” — Rose, Now We’re Only Falling Apart

“Don’t ever question this.” — Rose, The Answer

ruby and sapphire’s fusion helped pearl and rose, and their conversation helped garnet.

many fans might claim that garnet would try to pull pearl and rose apart because of unhealthy “obsession/dependency” on pearl’s part, but what they don’t realize is that this perception of pearl often comes from her behavior in the timeline with steven.

you know, in her early stages of grief. less than fourteen years is nothing compared to the 6,000+ years that pearl loved her. often what people perceive as obsessive behavior is pearl being fixated on the, in a gem sense, devastating loss of the love of her life.

(& not because she’s a pearl, or her original dynamic with rose. they were both against the beliefs of homeworld and their love only started when they were in a safe environment to genuinely fall in love with each other. because she watched the mistreatment and abuse that rose faced from the other diamonds, then they escaped together. she watched rose almost get killed or be in serious danger on the battlefield, but she managed to save her countless times. she watched rose struggle with trauma and mental health, and only she could fully understand why. she survived so much with her and they had each other, but she still ultimately lost her.)

obviously pearl would appear to be more obsessive when she is fixated on the pain of her early grief.

however, following the war, it’s likely that pearl and rose were very attached to each other.

garnet would understand this because ruby and sapphire are the same way. with the trauma that garnet, pearl, and rose had from the war along with homeworld, there was an understanding that they all held each other extra close, were extra “clingy,” really, because they almost lost each other.

ruby often struggled to care about herself because she was so focused on protecting sapphire.

this was a quick interaction they had in jailbreak:

Ruby: “Did they hurt you?”

Sapphire: “No, no, I’m okay. Did they hurt you?”

Ruby: “Who cares?!”

Sapphire: “I do!”

apart from strong attachments, there were other problems that pearl + rose might have that garnet would understand.

sapphire and rose shared a similar problem, too:

“I keep looking into the future, when all of this has already been solved... As if it doesn't matter how you feel in the present. No wonder you think I don't care!” — Sapphire, Keystone Motel

although rose never had future vision like sapphire, both of them shared a tendency to get stuck in their own minds/daydreams.

sapphire looks into the future so much that she can’t be present, while rose had a lot of dark & painful thoughts about herself. these may not seem similar, but in both cases, sapphire and rose would become withdrawn and struggle with communication in relationships.

they had trouble really hearing and processing pearl & ruby’s words sometimes because of everything going on in their minds. “i need something right now, in the present,” or “can you understand that i love you for you, i know exactly who you are and what you’ve done and yes, you still deserve me and you still deserve love” would be hard to process when your brain is saying the opposite.

garnet would know that they wouldn’t benefit from splitting up, because she related to them. splitting up (especially without communication and making that decision on their own) is not something ruby and sapphire would want.

understanding the differences between gem relationships and human relationships make garnet’s intentions in “we need to talk” more understandable.

“Uh... I-I don't know. I don't understand your human relationships. So... uhm... goodbye!” — Pearl, Full Disclosure

relationships between gems are incredibly different from human relationships.

i think this confuses people sometimes, and i can understand why. they remember that ruby and sapphire are married, but what they don’t remember is that no other gems seemed to get married. most of them don’t understand marriage, and the crystal gems themselves had to learn about it and understand it more.

pearl and rose showed affection for each other in a variety of ways—and yes, some were things they learned about on earth. however, this is love and affection. gems are unlikely to learn about more complicated things, such as human rules and norms when it comes to love.

gems never say that they’re dating, or that someone is cheating on someone else. they do not label themselves as being polyamorous or monogamous. they just love.

gems can definitely be jealous, especially when they were someone’s favourite for a very long time and they’re suddenly becoming close to someone else, in a way that they havent been before. gems can worry about not being a favourite, but this is more difficult for others to see and much more subjective than cheating.

creators confirmed that pearl’s lyric “she chose you” in it’s over, isn’t it was only about how she saw the situation and not about what really happened. this isn’t like humans, picking someone to date over another. rose’s death was very confusing and pearl was simply trying to make sense of it. rose having a child with greg and then no longer being able to live with pearl forever definitely made her feel as if she wasn’t chosen. but both of you helped her begin to process and understand her grief more. rose loved both of them. her death doesn’t change any of that; it happened for reasons related to her, along with wanting to bring life into the world.

i think many fans look at pearl + rose’s relationship from a human perspective. this is one of the reasons why, even after the creators confirmed that pearl + rose were not unrequited, people continue to think that rose didn’t love pearl.

but even if humans can’t understand it, garnet would understand their relationship.

it’s also important to note that pearl + rose fused in we need to talk, before greg planned on trying to fuse with rose. as pearl said, fusion is the ultimate connection between gems.

“She had control when she used her power to drag their fusion into the ocean. But, a fusion like theirs is unstable, bound together by anger and mistrust. If that bond snaps, their anger will take over, and destroy.” — Garnet, Chille Tid

“I embody my... I mean, Ruby and Sapphire's love. I'll always exist in them, even if I split apart. But the strength of that love keeps me together. So I can stay Garnet for a very long time.” — Garnet, Keeping it Together

garnet witnessed pearl + rose’s fusion that day. they fused very casually (whereas the other crystal gems only fuse in deadly situations, according to pearl) and that would definitely tell garnet a lot about their relationship.

garnet understood their relationship. human relationships, not at all.

many fans say that rose couldn’t love / respect anyone until we need to talk, when greg demanded it. he asked her if she’s been in love with other humans before, and she responds with “how would i know?”

this doesn’t mean she’s never been in love before. with the confirmation that pearl + rose was not unrequited, rose being referred to as the love of pearl’s life in the movie, and many scenes in the show… at that point, rose had been in love with pearl, but never in love with any humans.

since human relationships are so different from gem relationships, rose simply wanted to know how greg, as a human, defined being in love.

“Love at first sight doesn't exist. Love takes time, and love takes work. At the very least you have to know the other person... And you literally have no idea who or what I am.” — Garnet, Love Letters

as a close friend & as someone living with pearl and rose, garnet knew and understood them well, but she didn’t know and understand greg yet.

it was only a few months into their relationship. with everything that garnet said about love, there was no reason for her to “root for” or “prefer” rose’s relationship with greg over rose’s relationship with pearl. they didn’t love each other yet, and she knew that pearl and rose loved each other.

rose barely knew him and she barely knew him; while she trusted her friends and everything going on with them, she couldn’t have trusted greg yet.

it’s interesting to me that so many fans have focused on the fact that greg was the first human who rose respected.

while that may be true, i haven’t seen anyone consider how the other humans treated rose. it seemed perplexing to rose that greg wanted to get to know her and build something meaningful.

people focus on how rose couldn’t respect the other humans, but if no one brought that up to her, it’s likely that they didn’t respect her, either. they probably saw her as a fascination, too, and they never even connected enough for rose to start experiencing human relationships.

when garnet saw that greg was trying to fuse with rose, i think she helped him because she realized that he was different from the other humans. special, really. he wanted to know rose, and this fusion/conversation could really help him build something meaningful with her.

garnet never saw pearl be jealous of humans who rose interacted with before, so she simply saw this as being another new bond between rose and a human, but this time, a nicer, more loving one.

before i post this, i have to mention another misconception i’ve seen:

garnet wasn’t looking into the future & seeing/accepting rose’s death & steven’s birth. it doesn’t work that way, especially because sapphire never looked into rose. either way:

“No one can see the future. I can see options and trajectories. Time is like a river that splits into creeks or pools into lakes or careens down waterfalls. I have the map, and I steer the ship.” — Garnet, Future Vision

“Rose hasn't shapeshifted, and she isn't trapped. Steven is a fusion. Rose could be trying to un-fuse.” — Garnet, Three Gems and a Baby

so there you have it. a detailed answer to a very tricky pearlrose question. the opposite take, as described after the question, absolutely makes more sense.

[heliza24]

So I think we should talk about the Holocaust imagery in the trial

Because it was really powerful, and part of what made the episode so impactful. It’s no accident that the writers set this part of the story in a city still scarred by WWII. The vampire trial is a twisted funhouse mirror of the actual atrocities of the war, and thinking of it that way helps illuminate its cruelty. It also helps name the specific undercurrents of that cruelty– the ableism, the racism, and the way in which the coven vampires view themselves as superior.

The whole idea of the trial as a play, where Claudia, Madeleine, and Louis are merely props, made me think of the plays that were put on at the Buchenwald concentration camp. The prisoners there were forced to produce theatre as a way to convince the outside world that the Nazis were treating people “humanely”. This farce of course gave the Nazis cover to continue committing horrible acts. The coven is forcing Claudia, Madeleine, and Louis to put on their play, and they’re doing it in a way that will allow the human audience to excuse the prisoners’ suffering as fake. And that gives the coven the freedom to enact as much cruelty on their prisoners as they would like. And of course being forced to perform, being embarrassed, is also a part of the punishment.

The way that Louis, Claudia and Madeleine were snatched out of what they believed to be a happy and peaceful life and transported straight into a nightmare also makes me think about Kristallnacht in some ways. I am half Jewish, and the granddaughter of Holocaust survivors. My grandmother was arrested during Kristallnacht. So I have a lot of personal family history that colors the way that I view this part of the show.

I’m also disabled, and I’ve already written a bit about how this show approaches eugenics. I was actually really happy to see the eugenics undertones made explicit during the trial, as it left no room for doubt about the connection between the great vampire laws and Nazi eugenics rhetoric. “The Dark gifts must never be given to the crippled, the maimed, or to children” was displayed prominently as part of the projections. Claudia has always been coded as disabled because her body is “wrong” and “weak” (written about so well in this meta by @once-delight) but her status as a disabled person was stated plainly as part of the text in this episode, both when Lestat says he “told Louis. Fourteen forever. She’ll be a cripple” and when Santiago says that “Claudia’s defect caught up with her” when she started committing her killing spree in New Orleans. It cannot be understated how much Claudia’s status as disabled person influences the coven’s desire to murder her. The fact that she is happy, strong, and loved despite being turned so young is a direct violation of the coven’s world view, and is therefore a challenge that needs to be put down. Around 250,000 disabled people were killed during the Holocaust, and that’s not to mention the forced sterilization done to disabled people and the cruel experiments that were done in concentration camps to prisoners without their consent. Crucially, the idea of eliminating disabled people and perfecting a humanity without “defects” was an essential part of the Nazi philosophy. And I think you can see that echoing through the vampire trial as well.

Obviously another way that the Nazis were trying to create a perfect humanity was through the elimination of anyone who was not the correct race. We don’t have any canon Jewish characters in IwtV, so we don’t have a one to one comparison to history in that way. But race absolutely plays a huge role in the trial. It does not feel accidental that two of the three prisoners are Black, and that the “star witness” (however coerced Lestat may be, the adoration that the coven shows him is real) is blond and blue eyed. The way Santiago describes Lestat, as having “ancient blood in his veins” and a “godlike strength” calls to mind the Nazi belief in perfecting bloodlines and creating an Übermensch- the perfect Aryan man. And although Madeleine is still executed, she is treated more gently by the coven, kept in a fog of hypnosis and given the opportunity to escape death. I can’t help but think that she was given those privileges at least in part because she is white. This also puts Armand in an interesting position, and maybe helps explain at least some of his motivation in collaborating with the coven. He’s not Black, but he is a person of color, and that may add some legitimacy to his fears that the coven may turn on him. (There’s also the interesting fact that earlier on in the show, Nicki calls him a slur used against Romani people. Armand is not Romani, he left India long after the Romani people migrated to Europe. But it’s interesting that in seeking to place his brownness, native Europeans default to describing him as Romani, since the Romani were also one of the main targets of the Nazis). Obviously there is a lot of hidden calculus going into Armand’s decisions here. But I do think it’s interesting to add race to that equation. I do hope fans of color will write more about the racial dynamics of the trial, since I am white and would love to learn more about this aspect of the story from them.

I’m still mulling over what I think about the part of the episode where Lestat embarrasses the homophobic heckler in the crowd, but it did serve to remind us of how marginalized all of the main relationships would have been at the time (queer people: another target of the Nazis) and how fresh the horrors of WWII are on everyone’s minds.

The absolute highlight of the episode for me was Madeleine’s decision to choose dying with Claudia over living without her. This is such an incredible conclusion for a character who began her arc as something of a Nazi collaborator. I know some fans were troubled by this aspect of Madeleine’s character, but it never bothered me, even with my own personal connection to the Holocaust. Madeleine’s will to survive, her outcast status, and her willingness to cling on to love, even if it isn’t morally pure, made her the perfect match for Claudia. And this episode showed us the payoff of that setup. Here she is given the chance to collaborate again, to move towards the acceptance and love of horrible people that will allow her to survive. But now that she’s tasted real love with Claudia, she can’t go back to that way of living. She can’t throw her lot in with the Nazis again. So she puts Claudia first, the first and only person to ever do that. Everytime I think about it I start crying again.

Ultimately it was the last image of the episode that really hammered home the Holocaust parallels for me. Claudia, reduced to ash. Claudia, reduced to her yellow dress. Just like the incinerated victims of the Holocaust. Just like the piles of shoes and other personal effects at the Holocaust museum. We don’t get Claudia’s final words to Madeleine, or the final words of thousands of real life victims. We just get the dress, we just get the shoes. We have Anne Frank’s diaries, just like we have Claudia’s. Two girls that will forever be trapped in teenagerhood. But those diaries end before the camps, just like Claudia’s end before the trial. 

I’m not sure if either of the writers of this episode are Jewish, but from the behind the scenes clips I know that Hannah Moskovitch was on set as they were filming this episode in a producer role. She talks a lot about giving Claudia a chance to be defiant and angry, and as @bluedalahorse pointed out to me, that’s a very Jewish way to respond to oppression and tragedy (Hannah is half Jewish just like me). Claudia does not go gently into that good night, and I’m really grateful for that. As we go forward I’m going to try to remember her fight, and not the final image of the ash and the dress, as I think about her.

[brucewaynehater101]

Okay so I saw you say space emperor Tim gives new planets PowerPoints so …

For his first world the power points are a nightmare. Tim, once a normal school kid, has unfortunately gotten used to Bat slide shows which are 900 pages and contain every piece of information known to man. YJ have become slightly desensitized to the pwr points (they just space out whenever Tim starts) so they don’t think to call him out on his insanity before

Tim sends every citizen a power point explaining ALL of their rights and new social services as his subjects explained in detail (it’s like 500-1000 pages)

In addition to another PowerPoints for any government employees or people with political power explaining what is and is not acceptable for them to do (a healthy bonus 1000-2000 pages)

People are impressed by his enthusiasm, but a little terrified of him because of this

Tim did not mean to terrify his populace with a power point…

He must DO better next time to ensure populous is not terrified…

How do you make a PowerPoint that is not terrifying to the average person but still conveys the necessary information…

Tim doesn’t really know anymore

Cassie is the only one who has any idea what a “normal person” power point looks like (Kon never went to school/only knows scientific “we’re making a clone” power points from imprinted memories + Bart is beyond PowerPoints in the future)

So Cassie and Tim team up to hella compress Tim’s power points into short but meaningful summaries (Bart and Kon still try to help as test audience)

With each planet they add Tim gets better and better at normal people PowerPoints

Repeat leave planet accidentally becomes experiment ground for improving power points (it’s the same info but Tim actually gets a chance to do better at the presentation)

Tim’s PowerPoint eventually become beautiful near works of art that perfectly summarize what people need to know (and tell them where they can get more info if they want it cause Tim still wants desperately to give them every piece of information they could possibly need)

Maybe a planet with a people that respect the art of presenting information/educating others join Tim’s empire because they see his work and just wanna get a great power point presentation too :)

This also accidentally sets him up to be the best ceo/high ranking employee from the Wayne family that WE has ever seen cause for the first time in 40 years someone cares about the wellbeing of the company and can make a normal length presentation (Bruce could never)

With his new PowerPoint skills I also think Tim sends out PowerPoints for anything official news worthy that a planet might have to deal with. It ranges from built a building! to new social service! to new planet yeah! to we’re going to war and everything is going to be fine don’t worry about it! and so many other official statements as PowerPoint presentations oh my

So yeah, PowerPoints :)

Tim Drake, the PowerPoint King.

After he masters the PowerPoints, I'd love to sit through one of them. The "So you've decided to join the Timpire" one would be so intriguing to hear about.

What policies are in place? Rules, regulations, restrictions? What do people need to fill out, add to their planet, get rid of, etc.?

He'd also need to set up webpages with all the information (I hc internet is free everywhere in the timpire... though, idk how the internet and being in space work).