#but idk i feel like Their Our Know Rules yknow

[gemsofthegalaxy]

Maybe its because i am used to both Tumblr and Academic Writing but tbh. I didnt even NOTICE ( let alone mind) the alleged frequent "run on sentences" in The Starless Sea i've seen other people complain about

[mishkakagehishka]

i think it would be saur funny if Yuu suddenly got to telling people "well, actually, uhhhhhhh the great seven were villains" i think it would be so funny can we get a season 2 that is entirely just dealing with the fallout, i wanna see total anarchy i wanna see "what else were we lied to about" i wanna see the absolute existential dread

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Made it to chapter 16 today which means Feyre and I have both had our first impressions of Rhysand's Inner Circle and ohhhhhhh boy

Its hard to pinpoint why exactly, but theres something so discomforting about watching them interact. I think the main thing is that for all their "casual-ness", theres still clearly a rigid hierarchy between them and they all seem to 'know their place' so to speak, its not at all like Lucien and Tamlin's relationship in the first book which genuinely felt like a friendship that was unburdened by their status or positions. Like, theres this one moment where Mor and Amren are like kinda bickering with each other i guess, and Feyre remarks that Mor is probably super powerful if she dares talk back against Amren (in an incredibly minor matter Im pretty sure but I already forgor ngl) and because this is the book where Feyre's perspective starts being Objectively Correct all the time, I guess that's true, I guess the only reason someone would dare voice their opinion on something to this friend group is if they were physically more powerful because otherwise you just level a fucking mountain during an argument

Anyway, Im gonna switch topics for a short moment but I promise this diversion is relavant to the point above. So, sometimes when I go into the anti-tags on here looking for criticisms or complaints of the books, I instead find anti-ship posts that are mainly just about trash-talking some ship, mostly ones relating to that whole Elucien/Elriel/Gwynriel shipwar, which I already have thoughts on but I'll save those for later. In any case, one day I stumbled upon this pretty long anti-elriel post about how the gifts Elain gives Azriel on winter solstice arent actually cute and it describes how she gave him like, herbs that help with headaches "because his friends are always giving him headaches" apparently. And then that post went on a whole rant about how insensitive that was of her and that she doesnt actually understand Azriel's dynamic with his close friends, but honestly, judging from this chapter Elain was absolutely spot on

And I usually wouldn't say this because yknow, its only one chapter and we're probably gonna get the nuances of their relationship later, but this is a book written by Sarah J Maas, her characters and their relationships are rarely particularly deep and, more importantly, her writing is incredibly unsubtle. If Azriel was in any way fond of his friends shenaningans I wouldve noticed it, because Feyre wouldve noticed it like 15 times during that whole dinner. But she didnt.

Its especially bad for Cassian and Azriel because it feels like Cassian thinks they have this great rapport but Azriel just genuinely kinda dislikes him. Not to mention that whole fucking mess with Azriel and Mor and Cassian and Mor having sex so she wouldnt get married off or whatever, good god how is every conversation between them not insanely awkward

Even beyond that, idk man, theyre all just so insufferable. I dont understand how Amren, ancient eldritch being trapped in a fae body that she is, can stand to be around them, I wouldve left them 5 centuries ago if I was her. I guess the explanation is that she finds the government position interesting but its like, youre SECOND to the most boring and annoying man on the planet only kinda ruling over a court that you dont even actually care about from everything Ive heard. Again, if I was in Amren's position I would not be hanging out in an APARTMENT in a boring ass city at the behest of a quartett of stupid bozos, I wouldve weaseled my way into being the personal advisor of Beron or some shit so I could watch the Vanserra Family Drama unfold live

There was one good thing about this discomforting dinner though, and that was how inexplicably gay Cassian was for Rhysand. He was really out there, looking at him with such love, calling him pretty twice in like two minutes being all "I knew I wanted a piece of him the moment I first saw him, the high lord's pretty son" like okay. I know what you are

[twistedastrology]

Outer Planets & Affliction: What destroys a man.

----------------------------------------------------------

gonna talk abt a much darker topic today bc i feel like it and it's absolutely fascinating to me from a very morbid perspective (which happens a lot 4 me)

im gonna start this off by saying this is mostly focusing on extreme cases/what Could happen due to outer planet affliction, none of this is definite if u have afflicted outer planets bc it depends on the severity of their affliction and how many good counter aspects u have to them that help u heal!! :)

to start, the outer planets to me are Saturn to Pluto, so let me give u a quick rundown of what I think these planets are responsible for when they're heavily afflicted:

Saturn - Destruction of the will, the snuffing of one's inner, driving fire.

Uranus - Destruction of the mind, losing your cognitive function, going insane.

Neptune - Destruction of the spirit, loss or lack of intuition, feeling lost within your own life.

Pluto - Destruction of the body, the vessel decays and lacks the strength to repair itself.

i wanna say as well that all of this essentially came to me in a vision from god, i genuinely had no basis in my head initially, i was just rambling to myself in my head and all of this clicked and then it genuinely made sense and i even had evidence to back it up, so i wanted to post abt it because i love dark stuff like this (my blog name isn't twisted astrology for no reason- i mean like the reason was bc it was a play on twist and twisted transistor by korn But yknow it gains reasons as i go on-)

let's go over why each planet destroys what they do:

Saturn destroys the will because it rules over time and persistance- Capricorns are more often than not very driven people, Saturn grounds them and gives them the stability and willpower to see things through. A strong Saturn is often manifested as a very powerful driving force, as the planet often acts an incredibly crucial pillar, if not the foundation in a person's chart.

Uranus destroys the mind because it's the higher octave of Mercury. It rules over innovation and change, even higher thought. A strong Uranus is often an indicator of a genius in whatever area of life the planet is placed into. Thus, when afflicted, it completely shatters and even lacks this potential altogether.

Neptune destroys the spirit because it's known as the planet of spirituality. It's the planet of our higher self and our shadow self, it's our connection to the planes of existence beyond our own. A strong Neptune is often indicative of enhanced intuition, and can even mean the person has a heightened level of awareness of their place in the world and where they're meant to be in life. So naturally, an afflicted Neptune means a complete lack of perspective and the loss/lack of the ability to realize there is more than the self, making one feel lonely, inadequate, and lost.

Pluto destroys the body because it rules over death, transformation and rebirth. It even rules over destruction itself, and its connection to death gives it an inherent connection to the physical body as well. A strong Pluto can manifest as a strong will, but also as a higher pain tolerance because of that. Therefore when it's afflicted, the soul's vessel lacks the ability to transform and regenerate itself effectively, and ultimately will crumble to pieces throughout the course of life.

OK- lemme write normally now instead of all fancy n shit 😮‍💨 But what's my evidence to prove all this-

well someone i know has very heavily afflicted outer planets, mainly saturn, uranus and pluto, but neptune was kinda roped into the affliction as well- and all of this checks out.

saturn especially hits him hard, which also makes it all karmic so idk wtf bro did in a past life but it had to've been Bad bc he's got some SERIOUSLY afflicted outer planets like jesus fucking christ- and like i dont wanna talk too much shit on here but he's insufferable to say the least and, probably bc of the afflicted saturn, will not do the work to fix it.

would genuinely hate to be him on his death bed like 🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡

ANYWAY-

like i said initially tho this does not mean if u have a kinda afflicted uranus, ur gonna go insane!!! no sir!!! it's just abt the extremes n stuff and what i have literally seen happen with my own eyes- i think most people have enough soft aspects to get them into the process of healing, maybe not even soft aspects maybe just solid placements- it's all subjective, rly-

but this is also a really good way to talk abt the Power that these planets have- they are NOT to be fucked with bc when afflicted, they can obliterate you and your entire life tbh- i dont think they Want to unless you somehow have beef with them but overall they are just incredibly powerful planets and i truly think when reading someone's astrology chart, you GOTTA look at the outer planets bc otherwise you're missing out on SOOOOO much crucial information.

i always say that i think outer planets, whether in transit or in a natal chart, have the absolute MOST impact on a person despite being so far away.

far away ≠ lack of impact.

i hope this was interesting to read or at least thought provoking bc i absolutely LOVE dark topics like these, probably my moon/neptune in my 8th house tbh- i mean im genuinely fucking petrified of tornadoes like lilapsophobia type shit but i still put that image here because i unfortunately think they are really fucking cool at the same time (ive had multiple nightmares where tornadoes have killed me. but like........ they're kinda cool......and i hate them........)

anyway!!!!! thank u for reading this far into my yapping session 🙏🙏

[nowandthane]

🎶 9 Ship Songs 🎶

Thank you @my-dumb-obsessions for tagging me ❤️ I saw this and wanted to do it too so I’m very grateful xD

Rules: List 9 songs for one (or more) of your ships. Optionally, tag 9 people.

Tagging @azurechicken @sillyliterature @ace-trash-boi @elvhencore @daedrabait @queentheirins @yurissweettooth @malabadspice @corgiofdeath only if you wanna do it! No pressure ❤️ and sorry if you’ve already been tagged 😅 Also anyone else who wants to do this ofc!

This got long so I’m putting it under the cut 😅

I can’t choose one ship lmao so, starting off with Dragon Age~

Riyaad x Fenris (for when Fenris leaves yknow. I promise they’re not this angsty all the time)

Shadow Preachers by Zella Day

I close my eyes, just close the door You want a minute, I'll give you more Maybe I don't want you either We're both unsettled, nighttime creatures Shadow preachers, nighttime creatures

Veara x Solas (though tbh this is just peak Solavellan song to me, it’s not really specific to Veara idk)

Murder Song (5, 4, 3, 2, 1) - Acoustic by AURORA

He holds the gun against my head I close my eyes and bang, I am dead I know he knows that he's killing me for mercy

Garrett x Anders (two apostates against the world + religious trauma who doesn’t love it!)

Sinners by Lauren Aquilina

So lets be sinners to be saints And lets be winners by mistake The world may disapprove But my world is only you And if we're sinners then it feels like heaven to me Our hearts are too ruthless to break Lets start fires for heaven's sake

Arianwen x Cullen (this was always their song for me, I listened to it all the time when I was writing Command Me to Love)

Gold by Echos

Nobody knows who I am I've got intentions of gold with my plans Nobody knows who I am I've got intentions of gold with my plans

Some polyships—

Heroes of Ferelden (Nayima x Leliana x Alistair)

Nayima x Leliana (they have issues post blight/honeymoon phase but they’ll work things out eventually. I see this as Leliana singing the song about Naya)

October Passed Me By by Girl in Red

Yeah, I got bitter when you got cold Could you really blame me though? 'Cause I'm still tied up when you go You know this song is about you, who else could it be? You were the first to make me feel like I was me

Nayima x Alistair (sometimes I think I choose this song for them/aliwarden just because it has the word ‘tainted’ in it)

Battlefield by SVRCINA

Meet me on the battlefield Even on the darkest night I will be your sword and shield, your camouflage And you will be mine

i havent made a leliana x alistair playlist yet

3 Snipers + Tali (the name started as a joke but it stuck lmao. So this is Sarani’s polycule with Tali, Thane and Garrus. Garrus is also romantically involved with the other two, Tali and Thane are queerplatonic. It’s a whole thing, I’m writing their story rn and it’s pretty complicated ngl but I’m having fun)

Sarani x Tali (yeah ok the music video I edited for them is to a different song but… *shrugs*)

Love from NGC 7318 by Tanerélle, Barnes Blvd.

I wanna tell you how I feel tonight I keep trying, but the words ain't right Nothing's fitting for a kind like you I'm never speechless when the earth's my view Killing the time Building a fort Wrapped in each other as we fall in love I've never met a girl like you, never met a girl like you

Sarani x Thane (but they WILL last, they WILL, I will MAKE IT SO)

Won’t by Tanerélle

I tell him 'Go fast' I've gotta thing for speed He tells me 'Lean back' I let him take the lead I know it won't last But he is all I need I write my name over his tongue So it is all he speaks I got a million fucking reasons I should leave him But I don't I got a million fucking reasons to stop dreaming But I won't

Sarani x Garrus (hmm, that’s a lot of Tanerélle, you might think. idk I was listening to a lot of her when this polycule was cooking in my head)

Ripe by Tanerélle

I know you been thinking that you can't But I think that you should If I can make your whole body ache I can make you feel good I'm what you need, I'm what you know Hooked on your axis You make my world go I'll keep you wild I'll keep you free Say you'll be mine I'll show you what that means

I have songs for the entire polycule too but I’m already at 9 so I’ll stop lmao

[picnokinesis]

Taka!! Hello!! I saw you have watched Wolf and I’m curious about your thoughts on it ?! I loved it so much tbh, cause I started watching it for Sacha but I ended up finding the plot and the rest of the characters rly compelling too :D

SKSKSK harsh cut to footage of me specifically reblogging wolf posts from your blog to coax you into my askbox as an internet version of Molina's homemade deer trap -

BUT YES HELLO oh my days it was so much fun, right? I also definitely started watching it for sacha, and - okay well, let's put all the spoilers under the cut

SKSKS so. Came for Sacha. Stayed for Sacha.......and then watched the last 30 minutes because I wanted to know the answers (SKSK BUT ALSO his...CORPSE was on the floor in all the important scenes so y'know! He was still there in spirit)

But MAN wow did sacha and iwan steal the show, right?? They were absolutely AMAZING! Absolutely killing it, made me crack up multiple times they were just...literally the best duo. And man the twist at the end of episode five just GRABBED ME because wow, I really should have seen it coming and it was the best kind of twist where it suddenly made everything Molina had been doing make sense. And like - man, I'm just in awe of Sacha's acting, yknow? The guy acted his SOCKS off in this, like right from the first episode, you know that scene where they reveal that he is. not in fact a police officer SKKSKS but it's like the spyfall reveal, right? the mask drop. only, unlike in spyfall, this isn't sudden - it's a slow ramp-up of something being very wrong with this guy, gradually becoming more and more unhinged, and Sacha just NAILED it. Absolutely phenomenal. And then the way they just added so much DEPTH to his character augh, I wanted him to get out of the whole thing SO BAD even though I knew it was super unlikely. But augh by episode 5 he was SO nervous and paranoid, and then he just spent the first half of episode 6 just.....so palpably terrified?? Augh. Love him. So sad he got stabbed in the neck rip but he made up for it by having the most incredible dialogue with molina for five episodes straight skskks (i'm still losing it over 'you're not going to shower?? ....you handled intenstines today' SKSKSKSK like. ok real talk when I first saw the trailer for wolf I immediately came up with au6, yet another campervan au, which I will probably do not much with but SKSKKS the vibes were there in the series and it was a DELIGHT)

With regards to the rest of the story, it was super interesting, right? I feel like you possibly enjoyed it slightly more than I did (I was like. semi-frequently getting extremely annoyed at the random sexual content that seemed wildly tonally dissonant 80% of the time - I was SO SALTY that Sacha's opera lipsynch of our dreams with a SWORD was intercut with. that. and then also Jack's tendency to just like. physically assault people as a method of questioning like BOY that is. that is a CRIME sir. I know you're desperate for justice but do not boyo. But that's kind of a recurring pet peeve I have with crime shows as a rule sksksk). That said though - I did REALLY love Jack, and guh the stuff with his neighbour was SO creepy (LIKE THOSE WEREN'T NIGHTMARES??? HELLO???????) and maaaaaaaaan the stuff with the donkey pitch was so messed up and creepy. It was really good though. I did feel a bit like...'eh' on the end reveal about who the Donkey Pitch murderers were - that was probably in part because Honey had just died RIP but also hmmm idk, like obviously Molina was one of them, but I feel like I kinda wanted more on who Molina actually WAS, other than just some person Lucia knew from when she was in psychiatric care? Like my running theory the whole time had been that he was actually Theo, Hugo's older brother, simply because he looked a heck of a lot like Hugo skksks and it had just been an interesting throw-away line from Hugo's dad that didn't really go anywhere. I think also the twist with Lucia rang a bit hollow to me simply because the twist with Molina had been SO satisfying because it made all these little weird things make sense and I felt like I SHOULD have known (especially after honey and matilda's scene where they talk about letting people think they're more stupid than they are), but with Lucia (at least, for me personally) it felt a bit more out of the blue. But it was good, don't get me wrong - the stuff with her, hugo and sophie made a lot of sense and maaaaaaaaan that was so dark. And then I REALLY loved the ending for Jack, like the decision to not reveal what actually happened at the donkey pitch, and him finding out that stuff about his brother and then burning the treehouse and FINALLY getting some control back over the whole thing.........BUT THEN INTERCUT WITH THE REVEAL THAT HIS BROTHER HAD BEEN ALIVE?????? LIKE????????? AHHH??? That was SO well done.

Anyway. Show good. I enjoyed. There was actually a lot of things narratively and thematically that I particularly enjoyed - like even though the two storylines felt quite disparate at times, there were so many things connecting them or echoing between them! Off the top of my head, it's things like the idea of people being in your house and doing stuff when you're asleep - like with Penderecki but also how Molina and Lucia did that too with Sophie and Hugo. And then how like, Matilda tries to break that bathroom mirror to escape, and then Jack and Lincoln are escaping in a, uh. Different way and they DO break a bathroom mirror. Stuff like that. There were definitely more than that but I can't remember them right now, but it was like....idk the way that they echoed between each other gave it an internal resonance which made it very satisfying to watch (and is actually the same technique I've tried to use in campervan part 6, which is possibly why it appealed to me so much!). I also really liked the repeated use of mirrors and mirror shots - I feel like that was trying to say something too but I haven't quite untangled it yet. But yeah! Fun times.

[lesbianrobin]

Do you have any TV show recommendations

my #1 tv show recommendation is to watch the challenge. i literally never cared about competition reality shows besides antm and now i am Obsessed because the challenge is perhaps the greatest show of our generation. i beg of you to watch this compilation video it captures the overall spirit of the show So well and it's also hilarious.

if you want recommendations on which season to start with PLEASE send me another ask, or ask sarah @steveharrington she's the expert.

ok now other shows ❤️ i'm not gonna mention shows like succession that are super big on tumblr or well-known prestige television like breaking bad or the sopranos because i'm sure you've already seen plenty of people recommending those yknow? so yeah.

cowboy bebop (anime). the live action does not exist to me. anyway. cowboy bebop is sci-fi. it's western. it's jazz. it's comedy. it's tragedy. it's about love and identity and bounty hunting and a little corgi. there's a reason why it's often called one of the greatest anime of all time. this kinda violates my no reccing super popular shows rule but i think people who don't watch much anime may not be familiar with cowboy bebop so i figured i have a duty to the people.

the get down. i wholeheartedly believe that the get down is the greatest thing netflix has ever produced and it's a goddamn tragedy that it was canceled, but what does exist is just. incredible. it's about the rise of rap and hip-hop, the death of disco, and struggling to figure out identity and the meaning of success in the bronx in the 1970s. created & produced by baz lurhmann, the show incorporates archival footage of new york and real people with fictional narratives in a truly masterful way. it's absolutely gorgeous. the music is fucking fantastic. it's So worth watching and i wish that it had gotten the same hype as other netflix shows like st, oitnb, etc.

speaking of netflix. american vandal. if the get down is the best thing netflix has ever produced, american vandal is a very close second, and i could honestly be persuaded to swap their places, but ANYWAY. it's a mockumentary wherein a kid named peter and his best friend sam attempt to solve the mystery of who spray-painted twenty-seven dicks on twenty-seven cars in the staff parking lot at their high school. it's one of the funniest shows i've ever seen, and also the only show i've ever found to be accurate to the contemporary teenage experience. it's also like... insanely accurate as a parody and critique of real true crime documentaries. also if you're following me you're probably an st fan, and eduardo franco (argyle!!) is in american vandal as well, if that motivates you any more.

xena: warrior princess. it's the best show of all time and also the worst show of all time. everything that people say about shows like supernatural and glee and riverdale? xena did that shit back in the 90s, they did it better, and they did it with lesbians. they did it with swords. they did it with aphrodite. they did it with leather and whips and clones and reincarnation and true love's kiss. please watch xena.

community. if you haven't watched community idk what you're doing with your life to be quite honest. just watch it already.

GLOW. attention all tumblrinas who like messy complicated stupid mean scheming sexy women. you will fucking love glow. sorry i'm recommending so many netflix shows but i can't Not mention glow on here it would be a betrayal of my lesbianism. it is about sexy women wrestling. it's got blood. it's got tits. it's got storytelling. it's got 80s music. it's got fucking your best friend's husband as a means of feeling closer to her. yellowjackets fans i'm looking at you. watch glow.

ghosts (bbc). not cbs. dear god not cbs. bbc. but yeah ghosts is a sitcom about a young couple who suddenly inherit an old home (manor? thing? man i don't fuckin know english aristocracy stuff) full of ghosts. it's a fun, simple premise, and some parts of the show can be corny, but the actors sell it so well that it's just a pleasure to watch. if you're into sitcoms, i think it's worth giving ghosts a shot!

that's it for now i don't want this to get super long ❤️ thank u for asking!! also sorry if this wasn't what you expected from me lmao. OH ALSO watch the muppet show. like the OG 1970s muppet show. shit slaps.

[mahoushoujotechsupport]

finally have time to continue my rewatch and its the bob episode

this episode really raised my expectations for the show in a way it never delivered so idk that there'll be much to say unless i see random stuff that ended up tying in later

now that the show is over i kinda feel like this episode was unnecessary lol it should have been a half ep if all it was gonna do was push guel back to space. it should have been an episode where the audience is made to sympathize with the plight of earthians more given what was to come and from what we see in the episode itself, but from the posts i saw around the internet between when the episode aired even up until now, a lot of people did not care for the earthian struggle and some even called them stupid. i'm sure that's just a ton of outspoken reactionaries but i wish they could have done more with this plotline

instead we get this idiot full on stockholm syndroming over his abusive father. guel could have had a clean break from everything. hell, he could have continued being a shitty capitalist but yknow maybe not be a war profiteer.

anyway, this ep marks our first opening change with eri's silhouette finally revealing her datastorm form

i love nika's character but lol i'll always side with norea on this issue. nika's idealism is noble, but it just doesnt work irl. and her saying that dawn of fold is causing suffering is so laughable when spacians and the benerit group are literally foaming at the mouth for profit at each new conflict on earth that they can provide weapons to

sabina-sama, my beloved

yea amerikkka sucks, norea, i agree

lol capitalists are so goddamn stupid

the depressing thing about this line is how so many things work like this irl and capitalists don't care that eventually profits will come down to a trickle becuase they'll jump on to the next big thing to get them high profits as quickly as possible

lol this is so dismissive to the suffering of an entire planet these evil ass people just left to rot

i didnt remember that they have kenanji in this scene telling rajan what a bad idea it is to send benerit group brownshirts to attack earth. i guess it's supposed to paint him in a better light and make him seem "reasonable" or "moral" or whatever but lol no

literally everyone pretty much until almost the end of the show

i wish we'd gotten more interactions with sophie, like a flashback of her on earth with these kids would've been nice

ok i guess i forgot the fight in this ep is cool, but lmao the prodoros doesnt even have a kit at all!!!!!!! so like what was the point

damn comrade olcott rules

oh huh thats kind of interesting. whatever that thing olcott's wearing looks an awful lot like the headpiece suletta and miorine wear in the timeskip to communicate with eri. i'm guessing it's some kind of gund tech since that facilitates the use of his prosthetic arm?

*secelia voice* kashtanka woof woof

can the novels please give us more info about this lmao like we're just never going to know why the hell notrette created quiet zero

i'm really never gonna feel sorry or bad for delling, like ok you were sad your wife died and you were a controllling freak

ok sure it's finally revealed to us why he came up with this ridiculous holder system but how dumb do you have to be to do this?

i said it in an earlier post as part of my rewatch, things could have gone soooo badly for miorine. guel was physically abusive, how was that leaving your daughter in "safe hands"? someone could have become the holder and literally raped her or something

anyway i hate delling and i'll forever headcanon that even though maybe they're on amicable terms in the end, miorine probably never fully forgave him

ok on rewatch i guess this episode was better than i remembered it being. like standalone, its definitely a good episode imo, but mannnn i really really wish it ended up tying more into the actual plot than it actually did. i just really sympathize with dawn of fold lol and instead they just got kinda brushed off as being pawns of the SAL's big plan to just rearrange who was profiting off weapons sales lol

ok might do ep 16 tonight too, not sure yet

[owen-not-carvour]

here have more rtc character headcanons!!

i want to know more abt them In Life so. here’s what i think all their favorite school subjects/activities were…

oh also i forget they’re canadian and I Am Not so just. insert in whatever the canadian equivalents are if i say something wrong lol

ocean: sga and gov (idk what the equivalent of ap is in canada but. whatever the ap gov equivalent is. that’s hers. bc you KNOW she was taking all advanced classes just to make a point) but fr. ocean was student gov president and wanted to be the first democratically elected female prime minister of canada (i think that’s all of it) so ofc this would be her thing :) pretty self explanatory for her..

noel: if they had a lit mag, noel was DEFINITELY part of it. idk if he would’ve been an editor or just a main contributor (or both) but he was definitely part of it in some big way for sure. i feel like he’d put in some stuff anonymously (but you could still pretty much always tell it was him) as well as some with his name on it, depending on what it was abt also. ANYWAY.. the being said he’s also ofc an advanced english type. i mean Ofc he is. and i can’t forget how he’s most definitely and obviously a french student bc Duh. (which is rlly fun to imagine bc I am a french student and there are legit 3 people in my class. it’s rlly funny to picture noel in our environment)

-oh also i think noel has been banned from doing pretty much Anything Remotely Invovled With Theater since the whole 7th grade thing. that’s one of the main reasons why he does choir. he’s literally banned from everything else.. he would do it if he could though :)

mischa: this one’s hard bc he’s the Angriest boy in town,, so like. what’s he gonna actually like yknow.. but in a weird way i think he’d really like science classes. just bc of the labs ofc.. but i think he’d like anatomy (basing this on his love of saw 5) he’d just think the dissections and shit are cool yknow :)

ricky: also a hard one.. we know he likes space and sci-fi and he’s rlly freakin smart but idk what that would rlly translate to.. maybe physics?? tbh i’m not rlly sure. he’d definitely also be a science-y person though. since he’s so imaginative i think he’d learn the facts and then sorta work w them in his head to make his own kind of rules and logic that still makes perfect sense to him but would seem absolutely batshit to the majority of other people yknow..

jane: actually forget what i said abt ricky and mischa being hard to think abt. she takes the cake. it’s hard bc i know Nothing abt penny lamb. (i want to though… how do i read legoland??) so all i have to go off of is her mannerisms and her speech patterns really. i think like noel she is also an english person.. a lot of how she talks seems like something i’d see in ap lang or lit,, (allusions and metaphors mainly) and just. a lot of what she says can be analyzed to oblivion like that. (i’m rlly thinking abt her catchphrase. like there’s definitely hidden meaning there).

-also,, here’s a great chance to talk abt my thoughts on her role in the choir!! i think penny *was* technically in the choir. she just didn’t really know how to befriend the rest of them (i think ricky noticed her the most but obviously couldn’t really communicate that to her) so she mostly just hung back. as for why no one remembers her (like the rest of them didn’t even realize there was even a 6th person at first. she doesn’t even remember herself. karnak doesn’t remember reading her fortune even though he actually did) i think that when she was designated a Jane Doe,, penny was actually gone from everyone’s memories until the moment she is chosen to be brought back to life. i think that’s really it. :)

constance: tbh no clue. part of me thinks that she doesn’t really have a favorite class. i think shes even more apathetic towards school than mischa is. like obviously she hides it but.. Still. she just. kinda hates it all yknow. bc it was before the cyclone and before she had her revelation and began to enjoy her life like 30 seconds before it ended.. so she probably just kinda liked the simple stuff like electives.. she probably had a couple art classes she liked (and also choir)

that’s all :)

[bossyuri]

Ima put my random thoughts about SRV in here! It probably won't make much sense but wtv sdfsg

again I haven't placed the last building or conquered the whole map yet, as context, but i did finish the main story aside from that.

So ima start of with thoughts while disregarding how the bugs affected the experience!

Overall, I had a good time! I really enjoyed it. I love the new crew. I loved the focus on friendship. I'd say the story overall is nothing really special though, which I don't think is necesserily a bad thing. Sometimes a chill story packaged in a fun game is good ya know.

I loved finding out bits and pieces about our friends through dialogue, I think that was great, and I really liked that it felt like a solid friend group. Modern Yuri (as I like to colloqually call him lmao) is so much more mellow from having a good support system early on lol. But he's still got some Classic Yuri in him.

The rival gangs I think that thematically, visually, their music and stuff, they were great. I liked them a lot, they had good contrast, their music when you fight them rules. I do think that they were a little underused in the actual story though so they don't quite leave the impact that say, the Syndicate did. The threat they posed felt more theorical than anything you actually see. Again not the worst thing, but I feel like they could've used a bit more time to be more present. (I did like how the Panteros stuff ended because it tied in with other things later though!). Like I think in particular that the collective could have been used a lot more.

That said I did play with looong months-long break for the first quarter of the game so idk how that affected my impression. And the last few missions I think were really, really cool, I really liked them! But I felt like the middle parts after a certain point weren't quite as memorable.

But I don't think it was bad! And the game isn't quite over yet, so I'm looking forward to what's to come.

Also I did like how narratively the game tries to give you a nice fantasy release from a lot of real life issues. I'm sure many people at Volition had to face these frustrations in their lives and it felt like. relatable yknow.

Now though.....so I work in game QA, going on my 7th year, and the game released in....really an unnacceptable state, which was really a bummer and really harmed it. I don't blame the devs. Devs want to give us good games. But they don't control release dates.

and they did not control covid. I know a lot people see covid as an "excuse" to fuck up games but trust me as someone who was working in the industry through it all, it absolutely messed up a *lot* of stuff that you may never know about. My setup from home is still not ideal. And thats not even getting into employee burnout but anyway-

I've had crashes to desktop, blockers in missions (regularly), broken multiplayer (tho i havent had a chance to test it again after patches) needing full game restarts for a variety of reasons (clothes broken, face broken, world stopped populating, quest blocked...) the clothes system still breaks for me after so many months after release (thought its a lot better. i dont fear the stores as much anymore lol). I don't know if it's a quirk of the PC version, but it would have been so much more of a good experience if they had had the time to polish the game more before release. Lots of gamers don't have much patience for this kinda shit, and it's a shame for a game that has a lot of love put into it.

But they're still patching the game, and the QOL changes that they keep adding are really good. The game is a lot more stable for me too so I will definitely keep playing, and I'm hoping that my mental state will allow me to make some fun content from it. I'm still kinda hoping for a steam release sometime so I might get to replay the story again if that happens. Because taking screenshots on epic is a goddamn pain.

So huh anyway. I don't think anyone cares that much but if you've read that far thank you! And also thanks for sticking around with me for so long despite my dropping off the face of the earth in a depression spiral. But I'm still around and Yuri is still around. And Saints Row V is fun!

[stardewsnail]

Intro + Rules

Okay campers! You all can call me Snail, welcome to my Stardew side blog--my main is @snailtiddies420—before we get to the fun there are some rules we all have to follow:

1.  This is a 18 + blog, minors dni, there be smut ahead 

2. We don’t yuck yums here, remember the age old proverb “don’t like don’t read” HOWEVER

3.  This is still my little corner of the internet, and I do reserve the right to refuse requests because there are some things I don’t feel comfortable writing for any number of reasons

4. I’m going to include a list of general topics I like and topics DO NOT feel comfortable writing below the cut (to be added to as I think of them)

5. I’m willing to give any characters a shot but given that this is a new obsession results may vary

6. This is a sdv side blog for now, but the chances of it morphing into other fandoms is always possible. The ADHD is gonna keep us ALL on our toes

7. Terfs can go fuck themselves which isn’t so much a blog specific thing but a general principle 

8. Include as much detail as you can in your requests! Leaving them open ended is fine but if you want something specific don’t be afraid to let me know 👀

9. I try to go in order as much as possible but I know if I force myself to do that I will end up just not writing at all—I promise everything will be done in time. Please be patient. Sometimes it will take me a while with angst if it hits too close to home y’know?

WHEN YOU ARE REQUESTING PLEASE NOTE - 

BACHELORS = BOYS

BACHELORETTES = LADIES

SINGLES = ALL THEM BITCHES

Unless otherwise specified the farmer will be gn (except when I forget that halfway through and randomly assign one idk fam it happens)

Hi hello this is my page and so I’m gonna get weird and specific

Also a disclaimer! I feel like these lists are going to grow the more requests I get. Please know if you ask something and then it shows up in the no thanks list it’s nothing personal and I probably just didn’t realize it would squick me out yknow?

OKIE DOKIE (both sfw and nsfw)

- npc x farmer

- mental illness

- angst

- hurt/comfort (I can do hurt/no comfort but just know it makes me sad lol)

- drugs/alcohol 

- poly

- lgbtq+ 

- pregnancy (not the birth)

- au

NO THANK YOU (in no particular order)

- Rape/noncon

- sexual abuse

- incest 

- water sports/ waste play

- torture

- pedophilia  

- miscarriages 

- birth

- feet 

- age regression (I’m familiar with it as a form of therapy and have nothing against it, just a personal trigger)

- homophobia (will write characters realizing they’re wrong)

- racism

- character bashing

[empresslesbiace]

Ok! So I thought this would be better as a separate post! This is a continuation of my AU for Descendants which is here:

(I’ve never linked posts before despite being on this website for literal years lmao so if this doesn’t work don’t judge me and I’m sorry!)

Anyways this is a reply to the question from @kelloggs4cereal about the other VKs! I have too much to say so,,, separate post!

Ok I know I said none of the VKs really know eachother or that they might belong to a group of other VKs who are treated like the heroes of their parents stories once were and while I think that’s still true I’d like to think that the main four are still a little group maybe? Maybe they have alliances apart from others because all 4 of them are actually really powerful people among the VKs of the isle.

Ok so Mal. First off,, I feel like we should definitely keep the whole “her name is maleficent but she isn’t allowed to use that name so she goes by Mal” because of the angst factor and the fact that that is def egotistic and abusive so it’s furthers the point that Auradon is shitty for leaving these kids here. But also, I think that isn’t her name maybe? Fae are particular about names. I don’t think Maleficent was even Maleficents real name in the first place. Maybe Mals name is something entirely different. Like Mallory or maybe even something completely apart from the “m” naming like Reyna or something idk.

I also feel like we need to elaborate on Mal being fae of some sort. Like I need the rules to apply here, she can’t lie, doesn’t like rudeness, names have power, etc etc. I also feel like she needs to have more inhuman features. I mean she can turn into a dragon cmon, she needs to have pointed ears, sharper teeth. I want her to look uncannily human. Yknow the whole that’s-not-a-deer? That. I want that for Mal. Idk if I want her to be a demigod with the whole Hades situation. I feel like we’re going into overpowered territory. But if she was, then the tragedy of Greek demigods looms over her. Most of them had a terrible fate? That’s always gonna loom over her. She’d be second oldest in the VK group.

There’s some fanfics that elaborate at least a little on the aspect of her being inhuman! A good one is this:

To elaborate on her appearance, I’d say her hair changes color sometimes but like,, extremely subtly. Her hair is blue one minute but looks sorta purple the next? It’s strange,, and no one can ever get a grasp of the color. Her teeth are sharper and her eyes are,, uncanny? It looks like her eyes are false. Like there’s something there she doesn’t want you to see. I feel like something similar would happen with Jane and the Fairy Godmother. (I can elaborate on those two if y’all want) Generally, I think Mal would be scary to be around because she’s Other. She dresses in clothes that no one knows the origin of. Almost like it’s from the fae realm? But no one knows how she got it. Words to describe Mal? Unsettling. Uncanny. Other.

Next would be Carlos. I know y’all think Carlos is the youngest! I say he’s not. 101 Dalmatians came out in 1961 so he’s second youngest cause I’m going with ages by when movies came out. Ok so I feel like there has to be a reason that Cruella is hanging around the others. Because doesn’t it confuse you? You’ve got The Evil Queen, OG Disney villain? Maleficent, terrifying dragon fae. Jafar tried to take over a kingdom with a political scheme. Cmon! Why is Cruella here? Yes, she skinned and killed Dalmatians. But compared to trying to take over a kingdom, cursing a baby and subsequently the future of a kingdom, and trying to poison and kill your stepchild and your only heir,,, that doesn’t really track??

Now I was going to say she did something fucked up and skinned a human,,, and that’s why she hangs with the big dogs. But on the other hand,, what if she didn’t? What if she killed dogs and that wasn’t enough to get her in the group so now she’s one of the lesser villains. What if Cruella doesn’t hang out with any of the big villains? So now we have Carlos who somehow ended up with the VKs, children of terrifying villains who are terrifying themselves and made a alliance group thing. Why is he with them?

I say Carlos is a genius inventor type. He’s known for his inventions and metal making. He can make traps like no other. Years of studying traps after his mother locks him in the closets with all her traps and shit. He’s made traps that have caught some of the strongest on the isle. He’s damn good at it. Got a whole ass business that he runs with Jay (we’ll get to that soon) but anyways, he’s smart. Smart af. This gets him on the radar of Mal, Evie, and Jay. That’s how he gets to be part of the group.

Now for his looks, I say he’s pretty similar to how he is in the movies. Except I think he’d wear more black and dirtied white and less red. I think the red would be from bloodstains. I think maybe there’s some animals on the isle, or there were, and Cruella killed them all and made a market on the skins with someone else working with the meat (or that she has a market and her place has loads of animals she breeds for their leather and stuff) so a lot of Carlos outfit is real leather and dyed black because Cruella is worried about the looks of their business (black is known for sleekness and professionalism and also we can’t forget that the isle gets scraps so some scraps are worked in as well)

His hands would be calloused and scarred from working with hot metals and skinning animals for his mothers business all day. He’s good with knives because that’s what he uses to skin animals and good with tools because he uses that for his own trap making business. He’s smart, he’s an inventor, and he’s damn powerful on the isle.

The youngest is Jay. Now I say his real name isn’t Jay. Take in mind, the Aladdin story is Arabic as far as I’m aware. I don’t know much about the culture. I also don’t fully know all of the cultures that the story of Aladdin is based on. There’s a lot of influences from China and Middle Eastern countries in the original story I’m pretty sure? Idk. I’m not the person to go to about culture perspectives on the story, so I’m not gonna say much. I just think there should be more in the story about culture, especially with Jay. Maybe his real name is something like Jabr? Idk. Like I said, no clue on culture but I feel like it should definitely be a influence on his design, especially his outfit.

Red and black would be major two colors. I read that traditional Syrian and Jordanian clothing was red and black and I also know that Jafars original Disney design is definitely red and black so that’s what we’re going with. Idk about culture, so if any of this is wrong I sincerely apologize. This is all what I’m getting from Google and we all know Google can be wrong a lot. I cant say much on Jays outfit tbh. It would definitely be better suited to someone who knows more on the culture and can design something light and airy that can be suited for parkour (I definitely think Jay is good at that so his clothing would be light) while also being true to his culture.

Now I like the concept of Jay actually being Aladdin and Jasmines son and not Jafars. That Jafar stole him from them as some sort of last huzzah against Aladdin and Jasmine when he got sent to the isle. This fic goes over the concept perfectly and is honestly my favorite fic in the fandom:

Anyways, I like the thought that Jay is still a bit of a street rat and he steals things but I don’t think Jafar has a shop or that Jay learned to steal from Jafar. Jafar wasn’t a thief, Aladdin was. Jafar was a political mastermind in the 1992 movie. He was plotting to take control of a kingdom within and he used magic to do it! He had that staff and all that. I’m fairly sure he was some sort of sorcerer. At the end of the first movie, he was turned into a genie and then trapped within the bottle and the rules of being a genie. I feel like if Jay is Jafars biological son, that would affect him. He’d be slightly Other as well. But if he wasn’t, then he wouldn’t be. But he would still learn politics from Jafar. Jay would 100% be a business savy dude.

This goes into the business he has with Carlos. Carlos sells the traps and Jay helps him run the whole business and is a mastermind on the isle. He runs deals with everyone, including the pirate crew and some of the top villains and VKs of the isle. He gives me Cassim (from Aladdin 3) vibes. Cassim obviously knew how to run a group (he was the king of thieves for a reason yall that title was earned) I say he runs a thieving group on the side.

He’s got long hair, definitely. He keeps it out of his eyes with a ribbon or something maybe, we’ll see. Scars on his face from scuffles he gets in (any scuffles he can’t win with his silver tongue at least) You can’t trust him, ever. He’ll either steal from you outright (and you won’t notice) or he’ll manipulate you into giving him your items for a deal that later proves to mean nothing. He’s dangerous and sly and a business man to his core.

I feel like all the VKs are not heroes nor are they villains. The world isn’t black and white but Auradon makes is out to be and the villains fall into that same trap. All the VKs are sorts morally grey? I feel like Evie is the nicest but she’s also the most ruthless when she feels her justice is deserved. Mal is Other and Strange and her rules are different than a humans rules would be. She hates rudeness and can’t lie but knows loopholes and tricks like no one else. Carlos knows how to invent terrifying traps and can use a knife really well. Jay is a sly business man who can and will trick you out of hearth and home if given the chance. They’re all dangerous, and that’s what makes them the most powerful VKs on the isle (followed closely by the pirate ship gang, albeit idk much about them in canon but I can elaborate on some ideas for them if y’all want.)

[yetdevout]

okay so i listened to the inversion in its entirety and i have a few thoughts

even tho it is not canon (except cutie in this case) i refuse to believe that out of the 1500+ people that died, none of our other empowered characters suffered from a loss as well. like xavier definitely was not the only person who the DAMN squad knew who died. maybe lovely was friends with someone who died. maybe sweetheart lost a distant family member who died idk. i like associating pain and suffering with anyone and everyone in the redactedverse

another headcanon. every year DAMN hosts the anniversary of the inversion to commemorate all those who died and were affected by the inversion. i can just imagine the shaw pack, solaire clan, DAMN squad and our other empowered characters to be there and pay their respects whether they lost someone or not. i imagine a bunch of tables set up in the middle of the stadium for people to bring candles and light them in honour of the dead. for example huxley bringing a candle with xaviers name on or sweetheart bringing a scented candle for their distant aunt or something. (now im imagining the DAMN squad grieving and damien lighting the candle with his fire elemental powers and comforting huxley °~° )

idk why but i feel like freelancer would work for the department after full certification. they seem like the type to do so and would do everything they can to change the system for the better. (i just want them to be friends with sweetheart okay? they are both baddies) same with damien but based on what he's trying to do rn while he's still studying at DAMN with that human-born-magic-user campaign thing i think he would work for DAMN but not as a professor like lasko

last point. i was pondering over milos words about magic being not only in his core but in his entire being because hes a shifter right? do you think sweetheart could have helped milo to bring the ward down?? shifting and cloaking and phasing are very different types of magic but for all of these, the magic can spread throughout the entire body for it to work therefore meaning that for stealths, the same rule applies?? that magic exists not only in their core but in their entire body?? i could be looking too far into it but i just want to know your opinion :))

also jett and kody can disrespectfully throw themselves into a trash can for being an ass to my favourite wolfboi and elementals

that is all. thank you <3

-🎶

"i like associating pain and suffering with anyone and everyone in the redactedverse" this is so funny it's going in the yetdevout hall of fame

i also believe it doesn't seem likely that the redacted characters didn't face more losses aside from xaiver. like a professor, a classmate someone saw every day, a cousin — like something to really drive it in yk? hell it could've been someone angel babe sunshine or starlight knew. so many ppl go to DAMN, who knows??

god the candles, i can visualize that SO clearly and it's so painful 😭 there's something to say about damien lighting the candles using his fire magic, the solemn control that he yearned to have during the inversion. he wishes for so much. though, standing around the people he loves the most, he knows for a certain that these flames won't burn out.

yeah i could imagine freelancer going for full certification as well! them and damien radiate "be the change you want to see in the world" so they would try to go above and beyond. i believe damien is trying to land a job on DAMN administration bc he wants to change so much about how the school operates. go him!

yknow what, that does make sense! both of their magic relies on the physical body, so the spread of magic through their body and out into the ward would be plausible. also, sweetheart just doesn't seem like the type of person to let milo do such a life threatening thing on his own. like it would take a 1000 man army and then some for sweetheart to have milo walk through the ring of fire alone. so yeah, i do see them using both of their magic to help bring the ward down! their core probably didn't burn out like milo's did bc of how undetectable stealth magic/auras are as compared to shifter magic. like milo says when they bridged, it's a lot and can be overwhelming.

[the-rxven-king]

Still thinking about Amadeus all these years later 💕

Got any OCs you're currently obsessed with atm? The council of I Heart Amadeus would like to know, oh great one of many fabulous OCs~

THE WAY YOURE STILL HERE AND THINKING ABOUT HIM ALMOST MADE ME C RY LIKE

idk who you are and idk if i ever will but know that i think about you sometimes cause it makes my heart so happy that someone loves one of my characters so much even tho i get scared to talk about them more often cause i dont wanna be obnoxious, you are always amadeus anon in my heart and i love you pls come into my inbox whenever you want to ask about whatever i will try to answer quickly sometimes it just takes a while for my brain to feel ready but i will Always try to answer questions about my ocs

i will ramble about some of my characters under a cut i dont wanna flood anyones dash with my bullshit if they dont want it!!! anyone playing in a campaign with me..... proceed with caution if you read!!! even tho i am coming back to this after deciding i needed to be done and. i didnt say too much spoilery shit. i didnt even talk backstory much. its fine.

as for ocs im obsessed with i am Entirely Not Normal about my character nowell, i wasnt fully normal about him when i first made him, but at the time i was only really talking to my ex and all the parts of nowell that really made him Nowell to me were things he didnt want to discuss so i didnt get to explore him to his full capacity. i dont blame him since nowell is one of the darkest characters??? ive ever made???? in terms of the things hes gone through? i affectionately call him a walking trigger warning. but it still made me sad sometimes

now tho? when i was able to put him into a modern horror dnd campaign and i played him a bit before our current hiatus? where ive gotten to fully explore him and every single facet of him, good and bad? it really unleashed him fully in my brain and it kinda makes me really emotional. i fully developed his backstory out more than i felt i could before (because what did it matter before if i could never utilize it? had to dull him down to be easier to deal with and honestly i think thats had an effect on his character now too) and ive learned more about him, hes grown into himself and he truly is out here changing my brain chemistry. i love him so, so, so much and i have drawn him more than any other oc i have im pretty sure. hes my most drawn son and i really wish i was braver about posting oc art on my blog now a days like i used to be in the past because i love my art of him. im pretty proud of it and the way hes made me want to create again. i just wish i could do him more justice yknow??? g uh hes everything to me im holding him so so gently in my arms

and also my boy veth???? g o d i love him sm especially since i!!! recently got to confirm/drop a big lore reveal about him in my campaign thats been going for like 2 years at this point!!! my party finally knows hes the only survivor of the royal family of kuzania and thus the rightful heir to the throne and not the BBEG whose currently ruling! i feel So Free now that i can mention his princely-ness truly i do. hes just. so sweet and so lovely and hes everything i love in a character cause truly i just accidentally made My Type in a man and now its just veth. the only way he could be even more my type is if he was a tiefling instead of an elf but he makes up for that by being like. 1/4 platinum shadow dragon. and one day thats gonna pop out with him i know it to be so. i want him to be able to have a bit of a draconic-ish form because of how STRONG that 1/4 dragon blood is. im gonna work on it eventually, but im v happy with him hes so pretty and i adore him

he also recently canonically got with a PC in the campaign (hes a main story npc!!!) and im So Not Normal About Them theyre driving me up a wall and i literally cried over them earlier this week because my friend came at me with a fuckin baseball bat of an answer to a vague scenario/question i told them about cause im batshit and think about character scenarios every day of my life.

im also leaving my setting for that campaign open for friends who arent playing in it to make characters and throw em in and one of my friends made an au of a character she already had that im Deeply And Completely Obsessed With named creed to put him into this world specifically to date veth cause theyre obsessed with veth like i am their chara and we had joked like "aha what if we just picked them up like barbies and made them kiss just to see if it worked out" and now they are literally The Couple Ever. like there have never been 2 men who were more perfect for each other in this entire world and the way they have a fuckin grip on me. i have also cried over them several times. veth is a poly king and by GOD is he winning rn. we have made this au version of creed canon in stadalon so veth is gonna have TWO boyfriends!!!! perhaps 2 husbands! perhaps 3!!!! cause another friend has an oc to kiss him with!!! we shall see!!!!

guuuuh and also my vampire spawn shadow genasi/tiefling requiem??? recently hes been So Loud in my head. i specifically made him to romance a character my friend made (same one who made creed) named harbinger cause i saw him and immediately fell head over heels and begged her to let me kiss him and other friends in the call at the time he was shown immediately jumped on the bandwagon wanting to make characters in relation to him (2 of them made siblings for him, theyre triplets! and the other just decided to make the most normal man ever (a fuckin lie. theyre Not Fucking Normal) because of the triplets happening and me being like imma out-goth this goth tiefling and out came requiem) and the last friend in call decided hell why not make a whole campaign out of these losers just for this One Blue Tiefling Our Friend Made That We All Love.

in campaign shit is Constantly Happening but me and them were talking and she told me that harbinger is finally starting to get to a point hes falling for him and requiems already been there cause hes disney prince ass level falls hard and fast. im cheering and screaming and kicking and crying i love them so much we keep talking future scenarios for them and im so deeply in love with how soft and gentle and adoring theyre going to be with one another one day and i would die for them both.

plus i just. Love requiem sm hes such a big soft sad bastard and the fact that he loves and cares so fuckin deeply and hes so kind? so open? so genuine? was not in the plans when i first sat down to play him he was supposed to be more moody and a bit more intense than he is now. he held my face before i even opened my mouth to play him and said no. i am kind. i am patient and understanding and i was born to love and to take care of people. i have also cried over him. i love him so so much and im just guuuUUUH yknow what i mean.

anyway. ill leave it at those 3!!! or i will never shut up!!! i have more ive been thinking about a lot recently but i will leave it at my 3 most precious blorbos if you made it this far i adore you pls take all my love

[oolathurman]

found this in my draft from before i left tumblr so have this now. it’s silly shit about wanwo and vette recruiting quinn to help renovate the ship.

--

yknow i was thinking about that post i did about renovating the with warrior starship

(yknow this one http://oolathurman.tumblr.com/post/172211844145/house-hunters-narrator-voice-newly-appointed )

And how stupid it was of wanwo to decide that renovating a starship of all things was a good idea

Anyway, I feel like by the time wanwo and vette get to balmorra, the renovation has only just started and although it’s gotten to a point where only the basic necessities have been completed (bathroom is technically functional and there are technically enough beds and the kitchen technically has all the basic appliances in)

So when Quinn requests to be part of the crew, Wanwo’s just all ‘hm idk man what can u do’ and vette’s all “who cares what he can do? I can use some help around here.”

Wanwo thinks it over for a moment and then asks, “Quinn, how handy are you?”

“Excuse me, my lord? I don’t follow...”

“Can you take measurements and hammer in nails and install appliances?”

Vette snorts and explains, “Our big scary sith lord here decided it would be more economical for us to buy a used starship that’s in desperate need of renovation. And by renovating, he means gutting everything but the supporting frame and beams and throwing everything else out the airlock.”

“But you were getting headaches from the lighting system in there too! It’s been a mutual choice, right?”

“Uh, no? Cuz you’re the one with all the money, big guy. I’m on your crew. My income comes from yours. And I definitely wanted to go with the one that needed less renovating, by the way.”

“I— y’know what, I see how that was definitely a decision I made on my own and am definitely starting to feel consequences of. And that bit about how you’re on my crew. It was weird to think about in that context. But we’ll talk about it in a bit. For now! Lieutenant Quinn, how handy are you with power tools, measuring things, checking if they’re level, that sort of thing?”

“I, um— I can review the guidelines and rules for starship modifications, to ensure everything is up to code.”

“Well, considering those building codes are what makes sure we don’t have furniture flying around if the grav stops working, welcome aboard, Quinn! Get your things inside and settled in, but be careful. We haven’t finished the renovation in the crew quarters quite yet, so storage may be outside the actual room for now. At least until we can get the other bunk bed in and get started on the loft bed.”

“Oh? You are installing a loft bed in the crew’s quarters?”

“Yes, let me show you the bluepr— actually, why don’t you just come inside, and you can get an idea of what it looks like?”

“The ship does seem to be an older model...”

“That’s cuz it is. Mister Rich Sith was making it rain when he decided to buy a starship that was ten years old. Hey, if you know how to fiddle around with the engines later, maybe the sound won’t be so horrid at night. Anyway just throw your jacket on the table AND LEAVE YOUR SHOES AT THE DOOR! We aren’t tracking dirt onto my ship!”

“Technically mine, I signed the papers. Anyway, slippers are to your right in that corner, we plan to add a mirror in the entryway because otherwise the entryway looks less dismal and actually larger.”

“I see you’re in the process of adding shelving here...? What for?”

“For additional storage of things. Trying to figure out what yet. Anyway, this way is the kitchen, and as you can see—“

“Why is there a microwave on the floor next to the caff maker?”

“— we have a long way to go. Other side is worse though.”

“I’m almost afraid to ask...”

[notabled-noodle]

(sorry if this breaks your ask rules) so I've honestly just been questioning my own sanity recently, I seem pretty fine on the outside besides some Autism & ADHD symptoms that I show, I know I'm likely the host of a system due to what I can recall of them fronting (+ screenshots I can find of their messages on discord + alotta trauma has been experienced here m8 + lot more that idk how to explain) but there's been these 'episodes' of sorts where it feels like anything hidden in shadows are moving (ex: objects, those fucking shadow demons that torment me mentally) and it feels like there's people touching me constantly anywhere they can plus some pretty heavy derealization and I'm just unsure what it is but that's not all, there's also random times where I just can't percieve myself as 'me' but unlike with the alters it's like- they're different, it tends to be fictional characters (2 in particular but that's not too important) and whenever I feel like them I just can't process things that aren't normal in their world that well but whenever I wanna talk about it I feel like people will say "maybe their fictives?" but ITS SO MUCH DIFFERENT FROM THE INTROJECTS IN THE SYSTEM, it isn't like someone else fronted it's more like I've become them yknow?? Like we've swapped our perceptions of reality in a way, it's hard to explain but it's been making me feel insane for a while now and I can't tell anybody about- frankly most of this (minus Autism & ADHD) irl so I have to stick to whatever's online to help me but google never helps so I'm Tumblr anoning hoping I can get answers- fuck this is a rant I'm so sorry this has been driving me crazy and I need answers because it's becoming more and more common as time goes on and I can't handle this I need answers.

I can’t say for sure, but this sounds like one of two things:

delusional attachment — a phenomenon where a person believes that they are a certain object or person, because of psychosis

special interests — it’s not uncommon for an autistic person to kin particular people from their special interests, especially if they’re experiencing dissociation

I don’t know a whole heap about delusional attachment, but I do know that it might be something to look into if you have other symptoms of psychosis.

that being said, it wouldn’t be unusual for the combination of autism and depersonalisation to cause you to feel as if you are someone you’re not. I feel like I take on personality traits based on whatever profile picture I have, and that’s just because I’m autistic and have a fairly malleable personality when I’m dissociated.

anyway, yeah. those are the two things that I can think of, but it may be something else entirely, I don’t know for sure. hope this helped!