#but im fucking pissed about that one that had my drive out into the middle of fucking phoenix TWICE just to ghost me

[nabsthevulture]

I'm going to go feral and start fucking biting people if I don't hear back from a job in the next two weeks

[butchlifeguard]

interacting with my mom when shes drunk is like being stabbed to death with a paperclip

[cheonstapes]

omg plss do a miguel x bimbo reader im in love <3

miguel o'hara stars in... 'HANDY MIGGY'

(っ╹ᆺ╹)っ

a/n ~ I. LOVE. BIMBOS!!!! thank you for the request sweetie, love you💗 miguel would deffo love a cute little bimbo, i just know it

summary; you don't know how to change your tyres. why would you? that's what your boyfriend's for!

pairing; miguel o'hara x bimbo!reader

wc; 1.4k+

cw; SMUT!!!!, breeding kink (can you tell i have a breeding kink), semi-public sex, fuckin on the car, reader speaks a bit of spanish, daddy kink, meanish!dom miguel, sub!reader, reader is a bit stupid, princess treatment!, reader is a bad bitch, overstimulation, squirting, orgasm control, teensy bit of aftercare, THEY'RE IN LOVE YOUR HONOR, nawt proofread - i cannot drive, yet.

surely you weren’t that dumb? were you?

standing there in the 40° heat - wedge sandals, short skirt with your thong riding high on your hips, sweat-sheened tits spilling our of your cute little crop top. a girl always has to look her best, even when she’s about to melt into a puddle from the sun. doing things that required you to use your brain wasn’t something you did often, that’s what your boyfriend’s for! 

to be fair, you were never big on cars. barely passing your drivers test, and your daddy getting you your first car shortly after - you didn’t really want to drive around everywhere yourself, the pink porsche taycan collecting dust in your garage, being a passenger princess is the lifestyle now. unfortunately for you, your boyfriend - even though he would collect all the stars in the sky for you if you asked - refuses to let you put that car to waste. so now you’re forced to resurrect the thing, cleaning it up a little bit - and…you have to change the tyre’s. 

you even forgot about the punctures, after you accidentally drove over a few spikes in the road coming out of the wrong exit - sometimes you question why you ever qualified for a license. all the tyres were severely fucked up, deflated so much they look like they melted into the floor. your daddy gave you a bunch of spares in case (he knew it would) it ever happened. they were just so heavy, though. you weren’t built for lugging around fucking tyres - but your boyfriend is!!

so you called him, in the middle of the day, knowing he’s probably busy doing his big man job or whatever - but you knew he would drop everything to come and help you, this is an emergency girl! to no one’s surprise, he got there within 15 minutes of you ending the call, speeding into your driveway as he jumps out of the car. sometimes, you forget how mouthwateringly sexy your boyfriend is. 

a tight black compression shirt, matching shorts that clung to his thick thighs - black rimmed sunglasses matching yours pushing his hair back. not to mention the little grimace on his face from stepping out in the heat. “what’s up, baby? you ok? need me to get anything for you?” aw, he was so worried. he’s gonna be so pissed when he finds out what you really need him for.

“hi papito, so glad you’re here.” let’s try to sweet talk him a little bit, maybe it won’t be so bad if you give him a little love - the one thing he can’t resist. you hold his face in your hands, pressing a glossy kiss on his puckered lips. his brows furrow slightly, big hands resting on your hips as he pulls you close him, a low moan escaping him as he pulls away. “good to see you too, angel.” he had an amused smirk on his face, lightly caressing your ass under your skirt. “now, tell me what you need help with.”

nodding, you shyly take his hand in yours and lead him to the garage. it was a mess, to say the least - tools scattered everywhere, tyres rolling around where they’re not supposed to be, something that looked like grease spilled on the floor. “the fuck were you tryna do here, babe?” you smiled sheepishly, looking down at the floor before looking back up at him with round eyes. 

“…’m tryna change my tyres.” 

he rolled his eyes, placing his hands on his hips as he stared at you - an unimpressed look on his face. “god, you’re really a-

——————————————————————————————————

- dumb, fuckin’ slut, aren’t you?” the hood of your car was covered in a mix of your shared arousal, drool dripping out of your swollen lips down your chest. “only good for taking this fat cock, hm?”

hard nipples rubbing against your windshield, body jolting violently as your boyfriend abused his cock into your cunt. he was stretching you out so deliciously, his arms under your legs to keep you stable. “m-miggy, mm- fuuuuck, ‘s too much!” he really didn’t care, not when you looked so pretty under him. secretly, he loved how much you would rely on him - seeing that look on your face when you’d ask him for help, shit if it didn’t make him so fucking hard. but, god did he love to punish you for it. 

“too much for your stupid, little brain, baby? y’re so cute, you know that?” nodding dumbly, you grind your hips back onto his, flipping up your skirt to slam your ass onto his pelvis so he can watch the cheeks ripple. miguel let out a low growl, slamming a hand down by your head so he can lean against your back, the other gripping your hip. “just wanna fuck you ‘till you’re nothin’ but a senseless breeding bitch f’r me.” his breathing was heavy against your ear, sharp teeth nicking at the sensitive skin. 

“you’d like that, wouldn’t you muñeca? quieres que te llene de mi semen. esta linda barriga toda pesada con mis bebés. wouldn’t let you raise a finger again, ‘m gonna do everything f’r you - since you’re too fuckin’ dumb to do it yourself, gorgeous.” he had such a mouth on him, didn’t he. that didn’t sound too bad, being a stay at home mum. as long as you don’t have to do anything, then you’d happily stay plugged up with his cum all the time.

his balls were heavy, smacking against your stiff clit as he worked your hips back on him. the sensations were overwhelming. every ounce of your body was feeling the pleasure, the reflection of his strained face through the windshield making you clench tightly around him. he hissed, smacking your cunt before gripping your neck and holding you against his hard chest. “stop fuckin’ clenching. if there’s anything that small brain of yours should comprehend, it’s don’t cum till i tell you to.” 

“papitooo- please, i need’ta cum - i can feel it, baby!” you, poor, poor thing. too bad he doesn’t give a fuck. he pounded into you even harder, blunt head bullying your cervix. he quickly flipped you around, pressing your back onto the car as he gripped your hips, grinding slowly into you. “hold it.”

angling his hips just right, he drove his fat cock deeper into you, coarse hairs tickling your clit. his fingers trailed up your body, ripping your shirt as he flicked your nipples, spitting on your chest to get them nice and wet. “y’re so pretty, mm, my pretty baby.” his balls tightened, cock twitching hard inside of you as his tip drooled all over your walls.

“gonna cum in your tight, fuckin’ cunt, babe - rub your clit f’r me, or is that too hard for you?” he was so cruel but so sweet. sadistically watching your shaky fingers work your aching clit as his pelvis slammed into you. “goood girl. squirt f’r me, muñeca.” he gazed deep into your eyes, big hands caressing your cheek. 

it all gushed out at once, a heavy stream jetting out of your and coating his chest as he let out a deep chuckles, plugging you up with his girth. he fucked you through it, pinching at your throbbing bud as you shook in his hold. “w-wait, miggy, ‘m too sensitive!” he grabbed your wrists, pinning them to the car. he let out a low snarl, covering you completely as he rammed deep inside. “quiet. keep that pretty mouth shut.” he didn’t realise how much that would set him off, his orgasm coming before he could even process it.

his whole body tensed up, ass clenching, fingers bruising your hips, hips jutting in and out of you - filling you to the brim with his cum. he was breathing sluggishly, pulling your hips down towards him to keep all his seed inside. “you…you did so good, baby. i love you, yeah? so much.” he whispered, leaning down to kiss your face affectionately. “i love you too, papito.”

you stayed there for a few minutes, wrapped up in each other as you found each others lips, making out smoothly on the car. you pulled a way, placing a hand on his chest - staring at the new tyres that he fixed on for you. “migs?” he nodded, kissing and biting your neck.

“how do i change the oil?”

-quieres que te llene de mi semen. esta linda barriga toda pesada con mis bebés - you want to be filled with my cum. this cute tummy all heavy with my babies.

-muñeca - doll

-papito - daddy

-i wanna be a bimbo doll!

[sturniolo04]

Piggy Back Rides M.S.

Bf!Matt x Gf!Fem!Reader

Summary: in which you love getting piggy back rides from your boyfriend

A/N: If you don't like the preadded name in my stories, you can either add your own name or not read it; it's up to you :)

it was no secret you and matt love language was physical touch. Any chance you get you guys have to be touching each other it could even be a simple a linking pinkies for that matter you just had to been touching the other or you would go insane.

Although having been dating for a little over a year, you guys have figure out what form of physical touch you much crave from one another. Matt loves having his hands on you thighs it was not only a comfort thing for him especially when he was driving but it was also way to say that your were his and he and you knew it. For you you just love resting you head or even nuzzling your face in your boyfriends neck while your manicured hands run up and down his back or torso.

It was one of those nights that you were spending with your boyfriend and his brothers at their shared house, you sitting on the counter watching the triplets bicker about what to cook for dinner, them ultimately agreeing on mac and chesse.

" what are we wanting to do tomorrow"

nick asks chris and matt seeing they were all in kitchen still, matt turns around so his back was now facing you while he was still positioned in between your legs. You slowly sigh out clamly beginning to wrap your arms and let them drape over your boyfriends shoulders on either side.

" it doesnt matter to me honestly"

chris repsonds to his brother looking at matt as he shrugs his shoulder. you let out and audible sigh that your boyfriend could hear.

'whats wrong"

he chuckles out

" you have to move so i can get down"

"why"

"because matt im going to piss myself if you don't"

"i can just give you a piggy back ride there"

he chuckles grabbing your thighs wrapping them across his waist as you giggle tightly securing you arms around his neck.

"okay then byee"

you squeal out to nick and chris.

and thats how it started and it didn't have to be formal like that it could be a simple as you two standing in the position and not having a destination in mind.

" do you guys ever get tired of standing like that honey"

marylou asks her middle child seeing you were all standing in the kitchen with you clinging onto your boyfriend's back. As he simple shakes his head in response to his mom swaying from side to side knowing you are practically falling asleep from the motion.

"no mom they are always doing that and I don't get it"

nick complains out

"its fucking annoying"

chris chimes in as marylou smack him gently in the stomach for his choice of words.

"agh sorry mom but its true"

he groans out defending himself.

"okay then well do you like it"

she questions you smiling at you practically half asleep on her sons shoulder.

"mhm"

you yawn out letting your eyes flutter close.

"take her to bed honey"

marylou chuckles as matt walks upstairs saying good night to his family.

It's gotten to the point that sometimes mattt would even come up with any excuse to have you on his back.

"baby come on lets go for a walk"

matt pouts as he is standing in front of your sitting figure on your couch.

"matt it like 6:30 in the evening and its suppose to rain in like 20 mintues"

you huff out as he pushes his knee to push apart your knees to create space for in to sit in between them on the couch.

"matt what are you doing"

you giggle out just rolling with whatever your boyfriend is trying to do at this given moment. Matt proceeded to wrap your arms around his neck and then your legs after.

"matt"

you exclaim out as he stand up off of the couch jumping a few times to readjust you on his back and to get a better grip on your thighs. Matt starts making his way to the front door with you kicking you feet trying to get him to halt in his actions before walking out the front door seeing its now raining.

"matt no i dont want to get wet"

you groan and exclaim out, knowing even telling him this information he is still going to proceed to get you wet.

"oh come on its just rain"

he chuckles as he steps outside allowing the rain to start pouring over your guys figure, leaving a cool feeling on the bare skin of your arms.

"okay okay i want to go back inside now"

you complain to you boyfriend after being outside on just the driveway.

"MATTHEW"

you scream out as he sprints down the driveway into the street of the neighborhood, as you grip onto his shoulders tightly and then proceeding to dig your face into the side of his neck and shoulder as he spins you two around.

"look at these two idiots"

chris states from the inside of the house staring out the window with Nick right beside him recording the whole thing.

"they are so in love it make me sick honestly"

Nick jokes out as Chris chuckles.

In the end, to say piggy back rides have become you and matt's favorite thing would be an understatement.

Taglist

@mintsturniolo @dirtylittleheart333 @wh0resstuff @spicymuffins03 @stayingstromboli @aaliyahsturn

[pzonnie]

a lil party

you had went out with your best friend Sasha since it was her birthday and she wanted the both of you to go out together and have some fun

you both ended up finding this random party hearing lots about it from other family and friends and both plan to go.

problem was.. eren said fuck na. “ren baby pleasee we won’t even be out that long c’mon its her birthday.” you begged your boyfriend, eren just looked at you like you was stupid. “you heard what i said.” and that was it… from him.

now what you look like listening to him??? you hit sasha up and let her know what he said, lucky for you the night of the party, he got drops to make. so you told sasha that you both will go as soonnnnnn as he walk out the door.

the night of the party you make sure you look good, you dig out your closet and find a cute black mini skirt, a red aaliyah graphic tee and some red dunks eren bought for you. oh its over

you and sasha do just as planned and make it to the party around 12 am

you and sasha had a fucking ball, you in the middle of all the circles and sasha catching it, took one too many shots and that where you end up where you at now

drunk out of your mind you and sasha sit at a booth yapping about only god knows what, you freeze when you feel your phone vibrate. youn touch that shit either you just sit there, ready to piss yourself.

you look at your call log and see you accidentally butt dialed eren. “oh fuck sasha.” “you gotta be fucking me” you and sasha hustle like yall playing football bumping into people trying make a touchdown (that fucking door)

you were really in no state to drive but luckily you and erens apartment isnt too far so you could take the backroads and avoid the highway (and the cops) you bid your goodbyes to sasha quickly and apologize for ruining her night (she said it was ok multiple times)

as youre driving home your phone is blowing the fuck up, texts, calls, all from eren. you answer one call “hel-“

“where the fuck you at y/n?” oh he’s pissed… you’re finished. you hear his engine in the background knowing he’s on his way to the party. you cant go out like this. “i-i went out for a second eren.” you sound sloppy as fuck panic fills your gut “where are you y/n” his engine only going faster and his tone getting deeper. you say nothing pulling into the parking lot of the apartment, quickly turning off the car and running inside. “eren-“ he hangs up.

you quickly take off your clothes changing into one of his hoodies and a random pair of underwear. as soon as you plop you hear your front door open and slam shut. you freeze. all that comfort you felt for that split second. gone

eren walks in the room eyes low, hair in a bun, looking dead at you. the wall look so good right about now

“you got 5 seconds to start explaining yourself lil girl.” he start walking towards you taking his jacket off.

“look i was with sasha and i know you told me not to go but eren it was her birthday and she really wanted me to go with her…” he takes his shirt off and stands at the end of your shared bed. “so… sneaking out the answer? that what we doing fr y/n?” he pulls your legs pulling your body down to him. “eren! ‘m sorry.” he kisses you, tongue tustling with yours, you grab the back of his neck guiding him in too of you, deepening the kiss.

he pulls away just a little “if you want me to forgive you, just shut that shit up and do what i say.” he starts sliding his hands through your panties and rub his palm up and down your slit “you wet as shit ma… you missed me while you was having your fun? hm?” his fingers start slowly rubbing your clit. you moan looking in his eyes “eren im sorry, m’… sorry” he slips his middle and index finger inside of you, pace switching up fast, you jump at the pleasure “fuck! s’ too much” you try and push his hand away but he wasnt having that.

“what i say? c’mon ma give it ta me.” you mouth opens slightly letting out the most slutty moans, he scoffs at you, “this loud and i aint even stick my dick in you yet.” you cum at his words, he feels you clenching damn near pushing him out.

“all fours f’me.” he demans tone deep

you turn yourself around for him arching your back just the way he likes it, he rubs on your ass before slapping it leaving a deep red handprint on you skin, you jump leaning away from him. “where you going bring that ass back mama.” he pulls you back by your hips. you hear him unzip his pants and throw them somewhere around yall room. he slids his tip up and down your slit before gliding his dick inside you.

you grip harshly to the sheets as he pounds into you. “ngh! shit baby… slow go slow! i can-t” you reach yours hands back and try and push him off “mhm..” he grabs both of your hands and pins them behind your back with one of his hands. his other hand pulling your hips to meet his. “eren pleaseee.” his strokes slow down but remain deep. he pulls you up by your neck, your head meets his chest. “youn listen this what you need. who pussy this is?”

he feels so fucking good inside you he really do belong in there “yours pa please im sorryyy.. fuck!” you feel your high coming and eren starts moving faster again “ you sayin’ sorry cause you mean it? or you saying it because this dick?” he asks letting your neck go letting your top half fall back onto the bed. you shake your head “mh mh baby im sorry for reall i aint mean ta..ta break your trust daddy forgive-me, mmmm im finna..” your mouth falls open as you cum on your boyfriends dick that white ring forming around his base as he finishes inside you.

your legs fall weak as you lay on the bed worn out. eren gets a warm wash cloth from your bathroom and cleans you off “you know thats all i wanted to hear…” he says laying next to you. you turn around and rub on his chest scooting yourself closer to him. “im really sorry ren… i shoulda really thought ‘bout what i was doin.” he grins a little, he know damn well he cant stay mad at his girl… “can you cook tomorrow, you should make it up f’me a. lil more.” you laugh at him.

“yeah i got you ren.”

yall omfg “take it” got ova 1k likes thank yall sm love u

🫵🏾💋

-pzz💤

[mikalame]

2023 Tom Kaulitz

Warnigns: tom eating you out basically, squirting, fingering, this is kinda cringe i apologise lol

I have some more bill stuff coming out but i did have to write for my hubby make sure to request taglist: @oppopotamus@violentnewmarley@saumspam@adissonsss

"Mmmh-hold still hübsches Mädchen- mmh" Tom groans his tounge flicking back between your swollen clit and your sopping hole. You lift your hips up trying to pull away from his mouth but his thick arms wrapped around your thighs are just getting tighter.

"Tom plea-ah- please- hold on" you whimper, your over-senstive clit making it harder to enjoy what toms giving you. You rake you nails through his curls and pull away with what little streaght you have left.

Tom had just gotten back from The Voice Germany and you havent been able to get a second with eachother on phone or facetime. You were both craving eachother so much but tom had been between your thighs for over 30 minutes and didnt look likke he was gonna stop.

"Not yet- stay still fuck you taste so good- missed this cunt" he trails off in groans taking about how he missed your taste, how he cant wait to fuck you senseless. Feeling famillar feeling shoot up from your legs to your achcing core you try and chase the feeling your hips grinding on toms face his nose bumping up agasit your throbbing clit.

Tom tounge dips in and out faster, feeling how warm your body was getting he deciseded to make it worth your while. He unhooks one of the arms wrapped tight around your thighs and move his index and middle finger to your core, your hips bucking at the lost sensaction before his lips wrap around your clit sucking hard.

His fingers make quick work at your cunt, picking up all your juices that have dripped out before teasig your entance with the tips of his fingers. "Please tom put them in alr-ah!" you moan as he pushes his fingers knuckle deep into your pussy.

His fingers moving at a fast and hard speed along with his lips around your clit puts you into over drive, your thighs closing tighter around his head while the rest of your leg straightens up. Your back arching of the bed as his fingers hit the aching spot in your pussy.

"Fuck Tom i-im gonna cu-!" you try and warn him before you screww your eyes tight, your hips moving on there own, you hands fliging ito his hair holding it tightly. Tom never lets out pushing your trough your high, knowing your high has hit when your back collapes back onto the bed your cheast riging fast as you come back down to earth.

Tom looks up at you through heavy lashes as he keeps on his movements, you post-nut clarity ending abruptly as a warmth heats up your core. You gasp and grind agaist his face trying to let him know you where gonna come again.

As he keeps on going your mews and whimpers only adding to the mischievous grin you can feel across your sensitive pussy. Tom fingers gring fast agaist your g-spot making it very clear to you that you wernt about to come.

"Ah tom- stop im gonna pee- ah tommy- Ahh!" you moan loudly, your climax hitting rather unexspected as your body shakes with pleasure, Your fingers now pulling on the sheets beside your ached body. You body flopping down on the bed fully exsuaghed from you cumming 2x in a row you gathher enough strength to look down your body littered with deep purple marks and light red teeth marks from tom.

You peer down to see toms faces dripping wet his beard speckled with little water drop-lets as his eyes meet with yours. You breathing slowing back down to a normal pace as you try a peice to gether what happened.

"Fuck hübsch, didnt know you had in in ya" he chuckles spreading your legs apart, leading your hand to feel the messy to made between your legs. "Ah Tom did i piss myself" you sit up looking down a the wet patch you toms face, shirt, arm and the puddle on the bedsheets.

"No- well sorta Liebchen, you squirted and i was so fucken hot" Tom groans he leans over you and places wet kisses on your shoulders leading to your face where he processed to say " cant wait for you to do that again" before pressing his lips into a passionate kiss.

i hope you liked i didnt spell check and i cant spell for shit sorry...

[trippinsorrows]

with me + part three

authors note: hi! its me again. i had some free time and most of this chapter was completed, sans gaps and editing, so i figured why not?

thank you everyone for all of the kind words, like im still so floored just how many people like the random shit that comes from my head!!!

also, some tags don't seem to work for some reason, like when i type it, the hyperlink doesn't appear so super sorry to those impacted by that!!!

warnings: angsttttt, language, suggestive content

song inspo: with me by destiny’s child

word count: 4.2k

taglist: @pixiedust4000 @southerngirl41 @yolobloggers @msbigredmachine @wonderingfashion

You were sixteen years old the first time you drank alcohol. Truly, a result of peer pressure. Alcohol never seemed as amazing as your friends tried to preach it to be, not with the amount of hair you’d held back while your friends retched their entire days consumption in toilet bowls. 

Just didn’t seem all that appealing.

And then it was homecoming, and your school won the game, qualifying them for state. The whole town was in celebration, but no one was as lit as the football team. And, of course, dating the quarterback at the time and as cheer captain, your presence was damn near a requirement. High school politics and all.

So, you, Amir, and your closest friends spent the night house hopping, partying at one place for a little while before moving on to the next. And at some point, at some stop, you’d been convinced to try a beer. Honestly, it was disgusting as fuck, but a small part of you didn’t want to be the one prude of your group, so you downed it. And then another. Followed by another. Which preceded one more. 

And by the end of the night, you truly were white girl wasted.

You thank God that you had good friends at the time who made sure you made it home safely, because you absolutely did black out. Amir did too, hence him not being the one responsible for your care.

When you woke up that morning, the first thing you did was dart to the bathroom where you emptied your guts. The second? Panic. You were terrified of your mother finding out that not only had you engaged in underage drinking, literally violating the damn law, but you’d gotten so wasted that you blacked out. It was incredibly stupid and highly dangerous. Your chest tightened and stomach coiled at how she would react if and when she realized what you’d done.

That was the most scared and nervous you’ve ever been in your entire life.

Well, up until now.

Because all you can focus, think, and obsess about is the fact that Joe will be in your state, in your town, in your damn apartment in a matter of hours. He’d text you in the middle of the night a screenshot of his flight information indicating an arrival time much earlier than you were hoping for. 

Dread swept over as you sent him a message asking if he would stay at the same hotel he usually used when visiting, not that it got much use. He typically stayed with you during his visits. But, you offered to meet him there instead, feeling more comfortable if you were out of this setting, not in your apartment that had some type of reminder of Callie in damn near every room.

It took longer than you liked for him to respond, and his answer only served to increase your anxiety and trigger some anger.

No. I’m coming to you.

That was it, no explanation to your follow up texts which you know he read cause bastard had his read receipts on. Just radio silence.

That pissed you off even more, because why the hell was he ignoring you? Wasn’t he about to come talk to you about something anyway?

Oh.

Your stomach tightens. Not knowing what the hell he wants is driving you insane. You know why you reached out to him, but why did he seem so keen on speaking to you? It’d been nearly five years, what could have happened to trigger this sudden desire to reconnect?

And why the hell did he respond so quickly to your initial message? Truthfully, you expected no response whatever, convinced that he’d probably changed numbers after his massive increase in fame. Or, for him to at least hit you with the ‘who is this’? But, he didn’t, he called you and immediately knew who you were.

A tiny gasp leaves your mouth. That must have meant he still had your number saved, the same way you still have his in your contact list.

You….you don’t know what to make of that, don’t know what to make of it at all.

“Mommy, why am I spending the night with Aunt Mariah?”

Callie’s soft voice temporarily eases you from your panic, granted it also makes you aware of how she’s clearly unhappy about this. You know why too. Sundays are always your ‘special days,’ where you spend the entire day together doing the most random of things from baking, to playing game, to random dance parties that sometimes result in neighbors politely asking you to keep the noise down. It’s a tradition, and this is the first time since starting said tradition that it won’t be happening. 

Closing up her drawer where you were just digging for some pajamas for her, you move to sit next to her on her bed. Her head is down as she plays with the stuffed animal in her arms. “I’m sorry, baby. I know this is our day, but mommy just has some business she has to take care of.”

She keeps her head down, voice low. “Can’t you do it tomorrow?

Fuck. You hate disappointing her. “I wish, baby, but it can’t wait.” More like he won’t wait. You’re not sure what you would have proposed regarding a time to discuss, well, Callie, but it certainly wouldn’t have been the next damn day. “Hey, how about this? Why don’t you and I stay home tomorrow and have a special special day on Monday?”

At that, her head lifts, eyes sparkling with renewed excitement. “Really?”

“Yup. Mommy can take some time off, and you can miss a day of school. It won’t kill us.” You rarely ever take time off as it is, mostly because a teacher’s salary isn’t anything to write home about. You have to work your ass off to keep a roof over your and Callie’s head. But also….you’re not even sure what frame of mind you’re going to be in following this meeting with Joe, so better safe than sorry. “But only if we can watch The Lion King first.”

Clearly pleased with this compromise, she offers you her pink finger. “Deal!”

You two seal the deal with a pinky swear as you hold her into your side and sigh heavily. You wish that you two could stay like this forever. “I love you, Callie. Okay? Always remember that.”

________

“He’s what?”

You anxiously chew on the nasty ass protein bar Mariah offered you after you realized you’d barely had anything to eat today. It was a part of the latest dietary plan she was following, probably something she found from one of those weird ass dieting groups she was a member of on Facebook.

You loved Mariah, dearly, but as you two grew older, especially after having her baby boy, Micah, she’d become increasingly insecure about her body. Always the smaller, thinner, more athletic of the two, you knew that she struggled with how much weight she’d put on over the years, especially when her plan to drop the baby weight didn’t pan out. You're not sure she’s lost any of it, to be honest. 

It wasn’t even a massive weight gain, and truthfully, you thought curves suited her well. But, it didn’t matter what you thought. What mattered was how she felt, which wasn’t the best, despite your best efforts to build up her confidence.

“He’s coming into town,” you finally answer, debating if you should offer her the rest of this grass in bar form. Why the hell is it so damn grainy?

“Today? He’s coming into town today?” You nod. “I’m sorry, I must have missed a couple chapters.”

“More like volumes,” you murmurs, sourly. It’s a great opportunity for you to set aside the dirt bar and explain to her everything she’d missed, from Callie’s initial inquiry to your calling him, to him sending you an itinerary for a flight arriving in roughly three hours at this point.

“Holy shit,” she whispers, careful of her volume despite Micah and Callie being occupied in the living room watching Bluey. “What are you going to do? What are you going to say to him? This is….this is bad, girl.”

“You think I don’t know that?” You lay your head against her kitchen island and force yourself to take three, big, deep breaths. “I don’t think I can do this.” 

You hear her exhale. “Don’t say that.”

“I’m serious, Mo. I—” You lift your head and try your best not to cry. Tears won’t do anything to help the situation. “I don’t know what he wants, but it’s obvious he’s angry with me already, and I can’t imagine when I tell him about Callie that he’s gonna feel any better.”

“You think he’ll be upset?”

“Of course, he will.”

“No, not that. I mean, yeah definitely, about that. But, I mean, you know….that you kept her.” It takes a minute for you to process what she’s asking, and it’s a question you hadn’t thought about in some time.

You’d been so consumed about how upset he would probably be that you kept Callie hidden from him that you hadn’t considered the alternative. What if he was more upset she even existed in the first place?

The thought alone takes you to a dark place. Feelings of rejection and abandonment that you yourself experienced and probably haven’t fully processed. Feelings you swore with your life you’d always protect Callie from. 

And always will.

“Then he’ll continue to not be a part of her life.” Your voice is sound and resolute. Mariah also recognizes that all too familiar look of determination that fills your face. 

“But what will you tell her then?”

“I don’t know, but I’ll figure it out.” A motto, a mantra, an oath. You’ve hit hard times before and always pulled through. This will be no different. Whatever's needed to keep your daughter from the trauma you experienced, you’ll do. No matter what.

Mariah knows better than to try to reason with you right now, not that there’s a ton of that needed. As a mother herself, she fully understands the intrinsic desire and borderline need to protect your child. She just also knows that you can be stubborn, and when you put your mind to something, nothing and no one can change it.

She just wonders how that’s going to bode over with whatever is about to go down.

You finish off the conversation with thanking her again for her last minute availability. You know you could have asked your mom as well, but she would have had questions, questions you don’t have the answers for nor the desire to explain just what’s happening.

Hell, you don’t even fully know what’s happening. 

As the time gets closer, you realize you need to get home and straighten up. Maybe vacuum or some shit. 

“Will you call me before I go to bed?”

“Of course, I will, mama.” You push back some of her hair, hating to see her sad again. She’s wearing that pout that you just realized is similar to Joe when he scowls. Shoving that from your head, you add, “and don’t forget about our big day tomorrow.”

That seems to win you a small smile, enough to make you feel less shitty about ditching her, even if it’s completely beyond your control. “It’s gonna be so much fun!”

“You bet your butt it is, kiddo!” You bring her in for another hug, holding her close and tight. “I love you, Callie Bear.”

“I love you too, mama.” 

Callie expressing her love for you is the soundtrack in your head as you drive home and even as you move around your apartment, dusting and vacuuming. You even clean the baseboard, something you’re sure you haven’t done since you first moved in when you were 22. 

You even make the controversial decision to leave up the photos of Callie or both you and Callie together in the living room and don’t really do much to move aside the indicators that a child lives here. Like her toy bucket near the TV or pink kiddy cups lined up near the kitchen sink. 

It doesn’t make much sense to you to hide these things when the sole reason you even reached out is to make him aware of why those things are there and who they belong to. You’ve stopped letting yourself try to figure out why he wants to speak to you or why he’s upset, realizing it was only making your anxiety ten times worse to the point where you felt like you were going to vomit.

Recognizing you have some time before he arrives, you decide to take a shower that’s much longer than necessary and will probably have you upset at yourself when you get your next water bill. 

But, it’s a nice distraction. Being fresh, clean, and moisturized is always a nice pick me up. Granted, you find it almost silly as you struggle to figure out what to wear. It’s Joe. Not Beyonce. Also, your outfit should be the last thing on your mind, as you eventually settle on a graphic shirt and some shorts. 

And realizing you have nothing else to do, you plop down on the sofa and wait. Wait for whatever the hell is about to happen once you open that door. Strangely enough, your anxiety seems to be settling. Granted, you wonder if that’s being replaced with denial, because you’re also starting to tell yourself that it won’t be that bad.

It may not be, but that’s not a good hill to die on. Preferred but not reliable. 

Needing another distraction, you scroll aimlessly through your Instagram, liking a few posts of friends, family, and former classmates from both high school and college. It’s interesting seeing how everyone ventured down different paths, some homemakers, some business execs, and of course the aspiring musicians aka unemployed. 

And then there was you, the small town teacher raising her secret love child of a WWE superstar in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. 

Your stomach twisting and turning tells you the anxiety is returning, but it doesn’t have as much time to heighten because the doorbell rings.

He’s here.

There’s this irritating yet quiet ringing in your ears and anchor on your chest, both of which make it harder to untangle your limbs and move off the sofa. It’s like watching yourself slowly make your way to the door, the tremble in your hand noticeable as you undo the lock and start to turn the knob. 

I love you too, mama.

Callie’s sweet, reassuring voice floods into your head providing the sweet relief needed to return from dissociation and snap back to reality. Eyes shutting, you take another deep breath and carefully swing the door open.

Truth be told, you weren’t quite sure what you expected to feel upon seeing Joe again, not sure what you should feel. This was a reunion, but only in name. Nothing about him being at your doorstep was warm and inviting. That much is obvious by his stoic, unreadable facial expression, which isn’t entirely out of character. Contrary and both similar to his current heel portrayal, Joe has always been more on the quiet side, not as easy to read. More open and warm once you get to know him.

You’d found that out firsthand.

Taking in his countenance, you can’t avoid observing the rest of him. He’s somehow even bigger than the last time you saw him in person, almost taking up your doorway, rippling muscles on full display in the plain, black fitted shirt he wears. His hair is pulled back as usual, clean line up, and beard fuller than you remembered him liking it. He’s aged, obviously, but well. Very well.

Heat rising to your cheeks, you step to the side, allowing him inside. You hate how you close your eyes as you inhale his scent.

He always did smell so damn good.

The physical distractions dissipate when he’s inside, the door locked, and it’s just the two of you. 

You notice almost immediately how he seems to be intent on keeping his back toward you, playing it off by taking in your apartment. Not that much, if anything, has changed. He can’t be that damn interested. 

It was painfully clear that Joe was already frustrated with you just by his texts, but his anger is even more palpable in person, borderline suffocating. 

Just what the hell did you do to upset him so much?

Clearing your throat and crossing your arms over, you decide that someone needs to say something because this silent shit is not working for you.

But then Joe angles his body, still not looking toward you but something else. And that’s when your anxiety starts up all over again.

You watch him, intently, as he walks over to the side table near the sofa, the one that has pictures on it. 

Pictures of Callie. 

He picks one up, and you’ve never been so still in your life. It’s torture, not seeing how he’s looking, unable to read his facials, clueless to what he must be thinking. He’s quiet for too long, so you decide to bite the bullet and say something. 

“I—”

“Is she mine?”

Waves. Heavy, plunging waves of emotions splash at you with a ferocity that nearly floors you. His question, so simple, isn’t what you expected to leave his mouth. It’s posed so quietly, lowly, emotion evident but not enough for you to know which one. Anger? Sadness? Confusion?

It stumps you, and for a second, you try to convince yourself that he doesn’t mean what you deep down know what he means. 

“What–what are you talking about?”

He curses quietly, and you hear him say your name before he asks again in a dangerously calm voice, “is she mine?”

You recognize this tone, the tone he takes when he’s trying his best to tame his temper, but there’s no guarantee that he can. And that in and of itself is not a good sign, Joe rarely ever gets mad. He’s irritatingly adept at maintaining his composure in all situations. 

Except this one.

You just want to take a nap, take a break from all of this. Everything seems to be happening so fast, too fast. It wasn’t even 24 hours ago that Callie first asked about her father, and now the man is standing in front of you asking you to confirm she is his daughter. You’re so confused about everything. How could he tell so easily? You always said and thought she favored him, but did she favor him enough for him to take one look at her and know she’s his daughter?

That doesn’t even seem possible nor plausible. 

You have so many questions, but there’s no need in delaying the inevitable.

Rip the Band-Aid off.

“Yes.” 

It’s at that moment he finally decides to turn around, and you can see the moment it happens, the moment the floodgate of emotions rush through him like a tsunami. He’s shocked. He’s confused. He’s angry.

“How did you find out?” Putting the pieces together is a slow progress, but one that’s progressing nonetheless. He clearly came here with that question prepared and ready to launch. He knew about Callie, knew when you texted him, knew when he decided to call. Knew before he even walked in and saw a picture of her.

He just needed you to confirm as such. 

That seems to be the wrong question, because anger is suddenly more prominent, both vocally and physically. “You’re seriously asking me how the fuck I found out I have a daughter?” Any attempt to control his anger is out the door, replaced with visceral emotions. “No, the real question is why the fuck you didn’t tell me I have a child?”

You’re not sure what it is, the emotionality of it all, the fact that you’re face to face with the man you’ve worked so hard over the years to get over, or even just the fact that he’s speaking to you this way. Maybe all of it. Regardless, you’re not about to just take it lying down. “First of all, watch your tone. You’re not going to talk to me any kind of way. Second of all, you are married, Joe. What was I supposed to do? Send you and your wife copies of the sonogram?”

“Don't put this on that,” he dismisses, swiftly and curtly. “Jadah has nothing to do with you telling me I'm a father. Don't you think I had a fucking right to know?”

“Of course you had a right.” He did. He does. You won’t deny him that, but it’s also not as cut and dry as he’s making it out to be. “But—”

“There’s no but, Y/N!” He cuts you off, and you have to take another deep breath. This time though, it’s not to lessen anxiety. It’s to calm your own anger that’s rising. Who the hell does he think he is to speak to you this way? Like you’re some damn child. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Are you going to actually listen to me, or are you just going to keep yelling? Cause I don’t respond to disrespect, Joe. You know this.”

He actually smiles, smiles at your words. “You’re unbelievable, you know that? I’m disrespecting you? You keep my child from me, and I’m disrespecting you?” He scoffs and looks up at the ceiling, probably to settle himself. “Did you know when you ended things between us?"

The surprising questions just keep on rolling. “What?”

“I swear to God.” He pinches the bridge of his nose, eyes closed. “Did you know you were pregnant when you told me to leave? Is that why you did it? So I wouldn’t find out?”

This time, you’re the one scoffing, trying to rationalize how he could even think to ask you this. “Seriously, Joe? I told you why I ended things.”

“Yeah, well, you’re clearly not the most honest fucking person, so I don’t even know what to believe anymore.” 

You hate the fact that his words don’t further anger you but instead sadden you. You see how he’s looking at you, with a level of disdain and disgust. It’s such an unfamiliar experience, an unwanted one. “So, I’m a liar now?” It should have come out much stronger, firmer, showing him that you’re not putting up with his bullshit. Instead, it’s a damn near whisper.

He looks at you like you’ve grown two heads, like he doesn’t get what you’re not getting about this. “What do you call what you did?”

Your head is starting to hurt. This is going exactly how you feared it would go. 

Bad.

It’s all becoming too much, your voice weighed down with the emotions of it all. You feel like you’re on the verge of tears, and you hate that. You won’t let him see you cry. “We’re not….we’re not getting anywhere here, Joe. I think—”

“You should get a lawyer.”

Your heart stops. “What?”

He runs both hands over his face, the heaviness of this conversation clearly weighing on him as well. “We need to figure out some type of custody arrangement, and I don’t think us handling it with each other is a good idea—”

“Custody?” The room is starting to blur again, items moving wayward and sideways. The ringing in your ears is also returning. “What—you—you want to take her from me?” You need to sit down, your legs feeling like they’re ready to give out at any moment. Take her. He wants to take her from you. Unable to control yourself, you snap, “she doesn’t even know you!”

He matches your tone and volume precisely, clearly unwilling to back down. “Exactly, I’m her father, and she doesn’t know me because of you!”

You can barely believe the words coming out his mouth, incapable of processing that he’s actually standing here threatening to take your child from you. This has gone from bad to worse in a matter of seconds. “So, you think taking her away from me is the way to get to know her?”

His volume levels down a bit, and you could have sworn you saw a glimpse of sympathy. “I don’t want to take her away from you, Y/N. I just can’t trust you to not keep her away from me.”

This is disastrous. You never could you have envisioned this conversation playing out the way it is. Desperate, you move over to him, needing him to see you, to hear you, really hear you. “You’re here now, aren’t you? Isn’t that enough?” 

His answer surprises you with its austerity. He’s so angry. “No, because it took almost five fucking years for you to call me in the first damn place.”

He moves away from you, obviously headed for the door. He has nothing else to say. Your head is throbbing, vision still murky, but you manage to rush past him, obstructing his leave. “Joe….wait.”

You’ve never felt so small, so desperate, so helpless in your life. It’s reminiscent of the last conversation you had with him five years prior, that same boulder on your chest, bigger now. Much bigger. 

“Please.” You’re not even trying to hold in the tears anymore. That’s not even important. Not in the slightest. This is your child.  “Please don’t take her away from me. She’s my baby, Joe. She—she’s never even been without me before.”

He looks at you, and you can see it now. Finally see it. Finally see past all of the hurtful threats, the dismissiveness, the refusal to hear you out. He’s not angry. He’s hurt. “And she’s never been with me.” He moves past you, but not before one last statement. “Maybe now you’ll know how I feel.”

________

just curious, ya'll think joe trippin? personally, i'm team callie cause both reader and joe are wrong in one way or another but im also biased so ignore me.

[chrisstrnstorys]

𝓃𝑒𝑒𝒹𝓎

chris sturniolo x reader

summery: you’re a famous actress and after almost a week of filming you came home to chris while he is steaming with his brothers while you start to get very needy for his touch.

warnings: smut you already know what the fuck is going to happen. (don’t mind the misspelling english is not my first language!)

i had just gotten out of chris’s shower and he was still paying that stupid game. i missed him a lot i haven’t seen him for days because of all the filming we both have to do. i rolled my eyes and got changed infront of him to see if he would react but nothing. When me and chris are alone i usually never wear anything but this time i wore tiny shorts and a tube top. I missed his touch. “Suck it hard motherfucker” he yelled as his character on the game killed someone. His voice turned you on. You kept thinking of ways you could distract him until you noticed your new nails. You had gotten them done right before you visited chris. “Chris, do you like my new nails” you yelled so he could hear you. He turned his head and looked down at the nails you had spread for him to see. “Yes i love them baby” he said and immediately looked back at the game. You rolled your eyes and stared getting sexually frustrated. Chris kept yelling at everyone. He likes to win.

Half an hour passed and he still hadn’t looked at you. You were pissed, lying on his bed thinking of ways you could get him to shut that fucking game. You finally noticed he stopped playing. His legs were spread open and his right hand almost touching his cock. He’s so attractive.

I send him a bunch of texts but he kept leaving me on read.

“Is the game done?” you stated waking towards him. He noticed the tattoo you have on your v line that always no matter where he is or what he’s doing turned him on. His one hand wrapped around your waist bringing you closer to him. “Where do you think you’re going with that ass” he said still not taking his eyes away from my tattoo. That made me wet. “Com’ere” he tapped his hand on his lap as a sign for you to sit on it but instead you sat on top of him. His now bricked cock almost touching your shorts. He groaned while fixing his seat. “I need you” you whispered while kissing his neck. He groaned again while his hands trailed your body until he started squeezing your ass with both hands. You moved your mouth to his and kissed him passionately. He started groaning at the touch of your pussy rubbing up and down agensted his now hard rock cock. Not giving a single fuck about us being live to 500k+ people. He’s such a freak

“get a fucking room” nick yelled and chris looked at the screen where everyones jaw was on the floor. He raised the middle finger to the camera and then hit mute. slide down my tiny shorts but as he was going to rip my sexy black thong i wore just for him i grabbed his hand and he stopped “Baby no, not while everyone is watching” i said and he nodded. When I thought he wouldn’t do anything crazy i felt two fingers slide inside of me. I moaned at the unexpected feeling. My face turned red when i immediately punched chris’s fingers to stop.

“Oh my god” matt said. I was angry at chris but also needed those fingers inside of me so bad. “Okay bye guys we don’t want to release our sex tape today!” I said and turned off his computer

I immediately got off him. “What the fuck was that” i say giggling. Normally i wouldn’t react so calm but now im soaking wet so the only thing i need is his cock inside of me. “You drive me so fucking crazy ma” he said walking towards me. He grabbed my waist and kissed me for what seemed like hours. I pulled his shirt a little and he immediately got the message to take it off. Just like he did to mine. I fell on the bed with my legs already wide open for him. “You’re such a fucking needy slut wearing this thong just for me” i giggle as he ripped it apart “Chris no!” i yelled but he couldn’t give a fuck. “I’ll buy you a new one” All he wanted was to rip my insides like that. He pulled two fingers inside of me moving so fast i immediately got a knot in my stomach. I kept moaning as he kept going faster. My thighs squeezing his hand. “Aahh.. chris fuck” i kept yelling. “I’m gonna make you cum so many times baby” he said and just by that i released. He removed his hands and licked all my juices. He lifted his head up and kissed me while my mouth was still open shoving his tongue into my mouth the two kissed each other hungrily, each fighting for dominance over the other.

He grabbed my waist and turned me around. I already know what this position is going to be. doggy, his favourite. “You want it?” he asked unbuttoning his jeans “So bad” i said and within 5 seconds he slips it in. A pornographic moan comes out from my mouth “Fuck y/n” he moaned. Chris was very big. The biggest I’ve even been with(except travis scott obviously). We’ve been dating for almost 3 years and I still can’t really get used to his size. “You’re so fucking big baby go faster” i said in between moans. Chris goes crazy when i boost his ego like that. “This needs to be updated on our sex tape, we’ll get so much money if anyone finds it” he said and i rolled my eyes. He pulled his stupid digital camera and started going very fast. The only thing that you could hear in the room was our skin slapping, his loud slaps on my ass and my pornographic moans. I was on cloud 9. “Look at this fine ass, all mine, all to daddy” he groaned while zooming in so the camera could see the red spots on my ass while he was slapping my ass harder every time. “Aghh chris… arghh im.. so close” i tried to get the words out. my face buried in his pillow. “you look so pretty when i fuck you, baby,” he growled in her ear, “look at you, doing so good at taking all of me,” he said while my eyes rolled in the back of my head. . I was on another fucking planet right now. He makes me feels so good. “Cum on me, cum all over my cock princess” he moaned and I screamed so loud while releasing all over his cock. He pulled his cock out and zoomed the camera in all the white sticky cum coving his cock “Look at what my beautiful girlfriend did, you’re so amazing ma” he said and shut the camera. But when i thought it was over he turned my waist and started kissing my tattoo in my v line. He kept groaning and his tongue twirling my skin giving me goosebumps. I grabbed his hair and moaned again.

He knew i wanted more “Can you please let me cum mami” he said and i got wetter just by that. I’m a latina so he knows sexy spanish words make me wet. Even tho i was very sensitive i nodded and he gave me a peek on my cheek. He slid it in perfectly and started going uncontrollably fast. I stared screaming tears in my eyes. He kept moaning while i was holding to his back for deal life. “Chris im so sensitive i can’t” i tried to spoke out “please please you can baby im close” he moaned really loud as i was loosing my shit. I was a fucking sweaty mess. “i can’t take it, please let me cum,” i pleaded, feeling completely buzzed from all the sensation going in my body. “cum baby, i’m right there too,” he breathed out, feeling my walls clench around him causing chris to explode inside me, filling me up at the same time i reached my own high.

He pulled away and sat next me. We were both staring at the ceiling while silence filled the room. He knows how to make me feel good why i love him so much. “You’re deleting all that from your camera right?” i said with a serious face “I’d be stupid to ever delete that, that’s rare footage for lonely nights without my girl making me feel good” he said turning his head to face me. I giggled while he said kissing my forehead. He’s so stupidly cute. He got up a grabbed a towel to clean me up. He’s so good with me. After he got changed he pulled me and him under his sheets. My legs between his my head on his chest. He’s keeping me like a baby. His hand kept rubbing my waist. “I’m sorry for not giving you all the attention you needed earlier” he said and i smiled very hard showing my dimples that he always compliments. “It’s okay everything turned out great” i said “I love you cute girl” he kissed my forehead before i gave him a slow but passionate kiss. “I love you more” i said while smudging my entire body on him. He may completely ruin me while having sex but after he knows how to take care of me, because deep down he’s a sweetheart, my sweetheart

aaaa this is my first fan fic everrrr idk how we feeling abt this? if y/n won’t become me in the next 3 years im dying alone. i need him SO BADDDD

[the-lonelyshepherd]

What made you ship lottienat? :)

TYSM FOR THE ASK‼️‼️ i love asks (this is a hint)

oooh silly question okay

-honestly i was never really into shipping in the first place like i don’t go into a show being like hm. who should kiss.

-nat and lottie as individuals were my faves (along with shauna) through season 1. nat as a main i was more invested in at first but i really loved lottie in saints and all the lottielee shit plus her little comments and fun animal facts. and her weird girl swag. and nats whole demeanor in general she’s just SO INTERESTING. so i really liked the characters before the ship (which is why the mischarectarization pisses me off so bad, sorry not sorry)

-i never really saw them as a pair at first (i even kinda missed the doomcoming knife scene bc i was like what the FUCK is going on just in general. doomcoming was.. something) season two CHANGED IT

-i watched both seasons in rapid succession  for my first time through so i feel like i had a diff experience. s2 solidified lottie as my fave of all time, and i liked how they turned around from the edge they were approaching w demonizing her (schizophrenia). we got a lot more time w her character + time w adult lottie (im still figuring out adult lottie tbh. how does she work)

-i feel like their position as narrative foils was a lot more prevalent in s2 as we got more time w lottie as well as nat. you have the travlottienat scene in edible complex. which just GUH. i wrote smtn on that too. but like just in general a lot of emphasis on the physical vs the spiritual. hope vs the realist. 

-but above all what shines through is the SIMILARITIES in their characters. they’re different in so many ways but it just makes the ways they’re similar shine through so much?? they’re both general loners that have always been a little out of place. they both struggle with mental health. they both have issues with their parents. and above all they are both providers for the team. they don’t want to be leaders but they are almost called to it. lottie wants to be a martyr but they won’t let her. nat has never been one for the spotlight and now shes in charge. lottie cares about the good of the team nat cares about the good of the individuals in the team. something about the bleeding heart and the self made cynic. but they both just CARE SO MUCH!!! the parallels drive me insane

-onto them as actual characters and not their function in the narrative. the scene that SOLD ME was (of course) the bathtub scene. now this scene serves several purposes for sure and it’s a very important scene narratively/thematically as well as for my silly shipping purposes. it definitely hints at some kind of loose friend?ship before crash imo (supporting my party loners theory). lottie, who “only talks shit when someone really deserves it” talking shit playfully. nat, who’s words usually carry some kind of sting turning light. this is after they both (more lottie but ykwim) nearly died because of each other. it shows that there was something there before this “betrayal” of trust, the betrayal of lottie going on this path so different from nats in the wilderness.

-so now after that and the rest of s2 i went into my second watch curious on what i missed and DAMN did the pilot feed me. 

-lottienat dancing in the beginning lottienat hugging after the goal gets scored lottienat leaving together after the “freeze her out” argument LOTTIE GRABBING TAI TO DEFEND NAT AFTER SHE SAYS “"Don't you have a bong to hit or a dick to suck?". lottienat standing together at the party. et cetera. 

post pilot, you have scenes like the one in the middle of the night where lottie’s just staring at the attic. who comforts her? nat. so there was clearly some kind of trust in place. and as we go deeper into the free fall that is saints, flight of the bumblebee, doomcoming, and onward, you can see nats betrayal and animosity in this trust being

broken AND lottie’s confusion because she honestly is just trying to help. just, god.

doomcoming is a whole situation that’s honestly its own post but i wanted to touch on the knife scene because this is one of the first times we see nat actually really fucking scared of lottie. she can’t brush off the fact that there is something actually wrong anymore. and it scares her (and logically so. they did FUCKED UP SHIT. obv it was under the influence, off meds cold turkey. but it doesn’t excuse or erase what they did)

so then you have all the s2 stuff i went over and then the bathtub scene comes as this… return to the past? return to the energy of them from the pilot. it’s a gentle white flag in their horrible fucking world and it’s just so tender and idk. i fucking love bathtub scene. 

i yapped a bunch about other stuff previously and i don’t wanna talk too much about teen timeline (looking back i think i already did but wtv. i went “hm i’ll just go off the top of my head it’ll be fine”) bc im planning on doing a full analysis sometime soon. but wtv. 

adult timeline!!! keeping this one shorter for now bc looking back i typed sm wtf

immediately “you were always its favorite” “there was no it it was just us” “is there a difference”

also “she’s my friend” and then “is that what we are”

also the SCENES WHERE IN THEIR MOST VUNERABLE MOMENTS THEY SAW EACH OTHERS YOUNGER SELVES??? i did NOT come up with that it’s in the show. the flashlight scene and nats death scene (nats death scene def had several meanings but im talking shipping right now). i just think…. idk tho e closest we have to that is shauna hallucinating jackie when she’s an adult. and we all know jackieshauna as basically fucking canon. plus also lottie hallucinating laura lee which again. basically fucking canon. 

anyways basically summarized. i love the way their characters contrast each other and are so different and yet so fundamentally similar. i love their hinted at precrash friendship and the way there’s just this air of.. betrayal? around it later. i love the way they have one of the most tender scenes in all of the dark horrible thing that was season two. i love the interesting way their adult counterparts interact that hints at.. so much more? and i love how above all they care so much but are basically the narrative punching bags. i think they should kiss it would not make things better at all but i would be happy 👍

and honestly idgaf if you don’t like lottienat bc i get it. they’re not for everyone and that’s okay. plus their fanon sucks sm ass ugh. and the most vocal people who ship them are so toxic and weird and annoying :// i just think they’re silly and i like to microwave them in my head. peace and love

[comfort-person]

Publicity stunt

This GIF IM SORRY WHAT?!!!! 😩😩😩😩 anyways moving on this story is based on the ‘one bed’ trope. Yes I’m obsessed. I hope you all enjoy!!

Synopsis: you and Harry are forced to be a publicity stunt. He is your boyfriend for one year. A signed contract. But one problem… you hate each other.

Harry styles x fem! Reader

The lights of the paparazzis blinded you and Harry, Harry’s head bowed as his arm was wrapped tightly around you giving the impression of a protective boyfriend protecting his girlfriend his slender fingers wrapped around your hip as you both walked towards the doors of the five star hotel. Fans were screaming, shoving pictures and cd’s towards him attempting to get his attention but all he wanted to do was relax… what a day it had been. He was chewing a piece of gum, curly hair messy but driving the girls and guys wild as usual. His other hand was holding his water bottle, his sunglasses and his car keys… yes he did in fact have pretty big hands.

Once inside of the hotel, away from the eyes of the public you pulled away from Harry not saying anything to him as you walked to your guys’ hotel room. Eventually once at the right room you slid the card in before pulling it out abruptly the green light flickering slightly letting you know it had been unlocked before you pushed the door open, not holding it open for the man as instead it slammed into his arm “thanks.” He spoke sarcastically, you would’ve said something even more sarcastic if it wasn’t for the issue that had now made itself apparent to you… one fucking bed. Great! Just your luck, right? “Are you serious? Harry didn’t you say you got two separate beds?” You asked Harry dropping his stuff onto the desk

“Yes. I did. But clearly they didn’t listen… it isn’t my fault.” He spoke and you glared at him “not your fault? Pfft.” You scoffed, Harry’s cold green eyes boring into you as he stared an annoyed unimpressed look on his face “and earlier you called me childish. Grow the fuck up y/n.” He spat out, your attention now on him, a steamy angry emotion in both of you as you glared into each others eyes “it’s. a. bed. If you’re so unhappy with it sleep on the floor.” He muttered annoyed before sitting down on the bed, the outside world was already dark, and harry was just about ready for bed. You couldn’t believe what he was saying and hated the fact that he just didn’t seem to care… he was truly a fucking asshole. Gods could your life get any worse? “People describe you as a gentleman… apparently you’re not. Because if you were you would’ve offered to sleep on the floor… cliche but if you did I might actually like you.” You spoke, yet didn’t even get a response from him. He just ignored you. Blatantly ignoring you. It pissed you off. Yet you watched as he soon grabbed a hold of a pillow neither of you would use before he stuffed a pillow in between the already laid out pillows- the one pillow standing up right creating an invisible equal line down the middle of the bed, “there… better princess.” He spoke sarcastically and you glared at him annoyed “you stick to your side. I stick to mine.” He spoke and you just nodded your head, before hurrying into the bathroom with your pyjamas, Harry getting changed himself before the both of you decided to wind down for the night.

Harry’s back was facing you, your back facing him too, the pillow being a lot of help actually yet you couldn’t get comfortable whatsoever. It was as if something was bugging you… and you forced yourself to believe it was him that was bugging you. But in reality it was this whole entire situation… you liked harry… and hated the fact that you both had to go around hiding these stupid fucking lies. You had been fidgeting nonstop for a good hour and a half, Harry’s eyes narrowed as he stared at the wall blankly… he was really biting his tongue. But that’s when your cold foot touched the back of his leg his body jumping

“Jesus Christ y/n! You’re freezing… stop fidgeting and go to sleep” he spoke, voice laced with tiredness the deepness making his voice crackle slightly. “Okay. ‘m sorry.” You muttered before rolling onto your stomach before attempting to sleep again, Harry’s eyes fluttering shut as he sighed softly, relaxing all until a minute later you were moving again- bed creaking, foot colliding with Harry’s ass “ow!” He rolled onto his back neck craned to look at you “will you stop? You’re certainly doing that on purpose.” He spoke, your brows furrowed in discomfort “I’m sorry… I can’t sleep… can’t get comfortable. I miss my home… my own bed…” you murmured Harry’s eyes opening slightly wider as he listened to you “well… you’ll be able to go home sooner once you fall asleep.” He spoke before attempting to roll back over and sleep only to be grabbed by your gentle hand eyes full of sadness and worry

“Harry…” you whispered “y/n.” He spoke in the same tone “hold me.” Those words practically stumped Harry, as he froze, blinking- utterly baffled. Did he just hear you right. “What?” “Hold me Harry. Please… I- I can’t sleep unless close to someone… or something…” usually you had your back pressed against the wall but there was no wall either of the sides of the bed. All apart from Harry. Harry closed his eyes, exhaling quietly before shaking his head “fine.” He rolled over to face you, you rolling over again so your back was facing him before you backed up into his warm embrace- back pressing against his chest, his arms lightly wrapping around your waist hands closed into fists to make sure to not touch you without you wanting him to, your body soon relaxing as you closed your eyes, Harry relaxing too as slowly but surely the both of you fell into somewhat of a peaceful sleep.

Hours passed before eventually it was morning again, 6am to be precise. You would’ve slept in longer if it wasn’t for the fact that Harry’s fans were screaming his name… one side yelling ‘Harry’ another yelling ‘styles’ it was continuous. Annoying. Frustrating.

Your eyes fluttered open confused, a soft groan leaving your lips, yet that soon became the least of your worries as you soon realised you were not facing a wall anymore… but rather Harry himself… your chest pressed against his, face inches from his, your eyes widening slightly in shock…. You must’ve really gotten comfortable last night… Jesus. You stared shocked but didn’t attempt to move as you soon instead found yourself admiring him… his lips… his nose…. The way his eyelashes brushed against the tops of his cheeks… his hair sprawled out onto the pillow lips slightly pouted, arms still wrapped around you tightly and securely. His defined jawline and cheekbones making your stomach flutter. So much so you carefully reached your arm behind you grabbing your phone as you quickly but efficiently took a picture of him asleep, immediately posting it to Instagram keeping your eyes on him but also your phone to make sure he didn’t see you doing such a… romantic? Thing.

A sudden “you know it’s rude to stare,” making you jump a small lazy smirk on Harry’s lips as he stared at you. You quickly turned your phone off dropping it by your side as you stared at him “sorry..” you smiled softly staring at him the feeling you had towards him was now of fondness rather than resentment. “Want to hear a joke?” He asked softly voice lazy and amused and you hummed watching as he smirked “right… okay.. what do you call a dinosaur who constantly kicks you up the bum?” You shook your head not knowing “a megasoreass…” your lips immediately upturned into a smile as you laughed “that’s so fucking stupid Harry.” You giggled out “okay okay I’ve got one…. What do you call someone who crosses the road to find a chicken?” Harry stared confused “uh I don’t know.” “Harry styles.” You spoke, Harry’s eyes narrowing as he glared at you playfully “well who’s the one who likes chicken here? I only eat fish… soo… I guess it’s really y/n y/l/n hm” he smirked at you your smile remaining yet both your faces began to relax as he began leaning in, you moving closer to him as well before the inevitable happened…

Your lips met with his, the pillow that once kept you both from being close to each other now was a place for both your heads to rest, Harry’s hand coming to cup your cheek, thumb brushing against your cheek bone as he kissed you deeply but passionately, eyes fluttered shut, growing more heated, his free hand sliding down your waist and your hands grasping onto his shoulders tightly hands soon curling into his hair, tugging slightly before eventually you were both forced to pull away…. Breathing heavily… looking into each others eyes as Harry stared at you

“Shit…” he murmured

“Shit.” You repeated after him studying his eyes silently… there’s no going back now, right? “Fuck it.” You whispered, lips colliding with his again as you kissed him passionately, the kisses messy and sloppy as his hands travelled down your waist, until eventually you were pulled on-top of him the filthy make out session continuing… and well….

The rest is history.

[harry-styles-obsessed]

Publicity stunt

This GIF IM SORRY WHAT?!!!! 😩😩😩😩 anyways moving on this story is based on the ‘one bed’ trope. Yes I’m obsessed. I hope you all enjoy!!

Synopsis: you and Harry are forced to be a publicity stunt. He is your boyfriend for one year. A signed contract. But one problem… you hate each other.

Harry styles x fem! reader

©️ please do not copy or translate my work.

The lights of the paparazzis blinded you and Harry, Harry’s head bowed as his arm was wrapped tightly around you giving the impression of a protective boyfriend protecting his girlfriend his slender fingers wrapped around your hip as you both walked towards the doors of the five star hotel. Fans were screaming, shoving pictures and cd’s towards him attempting to get his attention but all he wanted to do was relax… what a day it had been. He was chewing a piece of gum, curly hair messy but driving the girls and guys wild as usual. His other hand was holding his water bottle, his sunglasses and his car keys… yes he did in fact have pretty big hands.

Once inside of the hotel, away from the eyes of the public you pulled away from Harry not saying anything to him as you walked to your guys’ hotel room. Eventually once at the right room you slid the card in before pulling it out abruptly the green light flickering slightly letting you know it had been unlocked before you pushed the door open, not holding it open for the man as instead it slammed into his arm “thanks.” He spoke sarcastically, you would’ve said something even more sarcastic if it wasn’t for the issue that had now made itself apparent to you… one fucking bed. Great! Just your luck, right? “Are you serious? Harry didn’t you say you got two separate beds?” You asked Harry dropping his stuff onto the desk

“Yes. I did. But clearly they didn’t listen… it isn’t my fault.” He spoke and you glared at him “not your fault? Pfft.” You scoffed, Harry’s cold green eyes boring into you as he stared an annoyed unimpressed look on his face “and earlier you called me childish. Grow the fuck up y/n.” He spat out, your attention now on him, a steamy angry emotion in both of you as you glared into each others eyes “it’s. a. bed. If you’re so unhappy with it sleep on the floor.” He muttered annoyed before sitting down on the bed, the outside world was already dark, and harry was just about ready for bed. You couldn’t believe what he was saying and hated the fact that he just didn’t seem to care… he was truly a fucking asshole. Gods could your life get any worse? “People describe you as a gentleman… apparently you’re not. Because if you were you would’ve offered to sleep on the floor… cliche but if you did I might actually like you.” You spoke, yet didn’t even get a response from him. He just ignored you. Blatantly ignoring you. It pissed you off. Yet you watched as he soon grabbed a hold of a pillow neither of you would use before he stuffed a pillow in between the already laid out pillows- the one pillow standing up right creating an invisible equal line down the middle of the bed, “there… better princess.” He spoke sarcastically and you glared at him annoyed “you stick to your side. I stick to mine.” He spoke and you just nodded your head, before hurrying into the bathroom with your pyjamas, Harry getting changed himself before the both of you decided to wind down for the night.

Harry’s back was facing you, your back facing him too, the pillow being a lot of help actually yet you couldn’t get comfortable whatsoever. It was as if something was bugging you… and you forced yourself to believe it was him that was bugging you. But in reality it was this whole entire situation… you liked harry… and hated the fact that you both had to go around hiding these stupid fucking lies. You had been fidgeting nonstop for a good hour and a half, Harry’s eyes narrowed as he stared at the wall blankly… he was really biting his tongue. But that’s when your cold foot touched the back of his leg his body jumping

“Jesus Christ y/n! You’re freezing… stop fidgeting and go to sleep” he spoke, voice laced with tiredness the deepness making his voice crackle slightly. “Okay. ‘m sorry.” You muttered before rolling onto your stomach before attempting to sleep again, Harry’s eyes fluttering shut as he sighed softly, relaxing all until a minute later you were moving again- bed creaking, foot colliding with Harry’s ass “ow!” He rolled onto his back neck craned to look at you “will you stop? You’re certainly doing that on purpose.” He spoke, your brows furrowed in discomfort “I’m sorry… I can’t sleep… can’t get comfortable. I miss my home… my own bed…” you murmured Harry’s eyes opening slightly wider as he listened to you “well… you’ll be able to go home sooner once you fall asleep.” He spoke before attempting to roll back over and sleep only to be grabbed by your gentle hand eyes full of sadness and worry

“Harry…” you whispered “y/n.” He spoke in the same tone “hold me.” Those words practically stumped Harry, as he froze, blinking- utterly baffled. Did he just hear you right. “What?” “Hold me Harry. Please… I- I can’t sleep unless close to someone… or something…” usually you had your back pressed against the wall but there was no wall either of the sides of the bed. All apart from Harry. Harry closed his eyes, exhaling quietly before shaking his head “fine.” He rolled over to face you, you rolling over again so your back was facing him before you backed up into his warm embrace- back pressing against his chest, his arms lightly wrapping around your waist hands closed into fists to make sure to not touch you without you wanting him to, your body soon relaxing as you closed your eyes, Harry relaxing too as slowly but surely the both of you fell into somewhat of a peaceful sleep.

Hours passed before eventually it was morning again, 6am to be precise. You would’ve slept in longer if it wasn’t for the fact that Harry’s fans were screaming his name… one side yelling ‘Harry’ another yelling ‘styles’ it was continuous. Annoying. Frustrating.

Your eyes fluttered open confused, a soft groan leaving your lips, yet that soon became the least of your worries as you soon realised you were not facing a wall anymore… but rather Harry himself… your chest pressed against his, face inches from his, your eyes widening slightly in shock…. You must’ve really gotten comfortable last night… Jesus. You stared shocked but didn’t attempt to move as you soon instead found yourself admiring him… his lips… his nose…. The way his eyelashes brushed against the tops of his cheeks… his hair sprawled out onto the pillow lips slightly pouted, arms still wrapped around you tightly and securely. His defined jawline and cheekbones making your stomach flutter. So much so you carefully reached your arm behind you grabbing your phone as you quickly but efficiently took a picture of him asleep, immediately posting it to Instagram keeping your eyes on him but also your phone to make sure he didn’t see you doing such a… romantic? Thing.

A sudden “you know it’s rude to stare,” making you jump a small lazy smirk on Harry’s lips as he stared at you. You quickly turned your phone off dropping it by your side as you stared at him “sorry..” you smiled softly staring at him the feeling you had towards him was now of fondness rather than resentment. “Want to hear a joke?” He asked softly voice lazy and amused and you hummed watching as he smirked “right… okay.. what do you call a dinosaur who constantly kicks you up the bum?” You shook your head not knowing “a megasoreass…” your lips immediately upturned into a smile as you laughed “that’s so fucking stupid Harry.” You giggled out “okay okay I’ve got one…. What do you call someone who crosses the road to find a chicken?” Harry stared confused “uh I don’t know.” “Harry styles.” You spoke, Harry’s eyes narrowing as he glared at you playfully “well who’s the one who likes chicken here? I only eat fish… soo… I guess it’s really y/n y/l/n hm” he smirked at you your smile remaining yet both your faces began to relax as he began leaning in, you moving closer to him as well before the inevitable happened…

Your lips met with his, the pillow that once kept you both from being close to each other now was a place for both your heads to rest, Harry’s hand coming to cup your cheek, thumb brushing against your cheek bone as he kissed you deeply but passionately, eyes fluttered shut, growing more heated, his free hand sliding down your waist and your hands grasping onto his shoulders tightly hands soon curling into his hair, tugging slightly before eventually you were both forced to pull away…. Breathing heavily… looking into each others eyes as Harry stared at you

“Shit.” He murmured

“Shit.” You repeated after him studying his eyes silently… there’s no going back now, right? “Fuck it.” You whispered, lips colliding with his again as you kissed him passionately, the kisses messy and sloppy as his hands travelled down your waist, until eventually you were pulled on-top of him the filthy make out session continuing… and well….

The rest is history.

[qmorningcrew]

dump all your ideas abt ur summer camp au i want to hear it

ahhhhhh first of all anon ily <333

here’s my ideas for the summer camp au so far :)

- it’s called quesadilla summer camp (im so creative lmao)

- the camp was created on an experiment. if it went well, they would implement the plans on a larger scale. (what’s the experiment? it’s assumed it has something to do with crossing the language barriers but no one actually specifies)

- all participants get college scholarships

- but the whole thing is really badly executed? like it just does not have the set up or functionality of a normal summer camp

- there’s just very little supervision or guidance

- the camp is run by some version of the duck, and they’re very uninvolved which leads cucurucho and zero to just Not Care.

- counselors are rubius, cucurucho, and the code entity

- the code entity goes by zero

- zero really doesn’t talk but they all learn pretty easy it’s how fucking awful of an idea it is to piss them off

- cucurucho and zero are they/it besties

- rubius is the same age/around the same age as the campers, cucurucho and zero are older

- sometimes one the campers walks into their cabin and sees an entirely new person in their cabin, which is normal. they switch cabins constantly

- the first week people just keep. randomly wandering off. “where’s wilbur?” two hours later wilbur walks out of the woods with a rock. (not even like a cool rock. it’s just a normal fucking rock)

- phil’s the mom friend. but he’s still a disaster. he’s just the only one with any shred of responsibility. he’s also just got an aura of trustworthiness that makes everyone trust him with their problems

- fit is just. so chill

- he also just? always has what you need? “yeah sorry it’s a bit hot in here, a screw that seemed important fell out of the fan earlier so we haven’t turned it on yet” “oh! i think it’s in here- nope screwdriver’s in the left pocket, where did you say the screw was?”

- dan just kinda disappears for a bit? cucurucho tells the campers he went on vacation but they don’t entirely believe them. dan comes back a little different.

- spreen is always either starting chaos or nowhere to be found

- quackity manages to keep putting himself in the middle of like every problem whether he’s involved or not

- however charlie pretty much is always involved

- luzu is had DID and arin is an alter

- luzu does know about arin but he was just diagnosed and is still figuring it all out

- roier flirts with everyone (except jaiden, he respects her boundaries)

- wilbur brought his guitar with him and sings at the campfire some nights

- charlie only joins in on the meme songs

- jaiden finds the most. random shit. “hey guys i found $20 stuck to the bottom of the picnic table with a piece of gum” “oh dude look! a patch of four leaf clovers!” “woah look at this cool bottle cap i just found!”

- maximus is a conspiracy theorist but in like a, hey this actually genuinely makes sense kind of way

- bad is terrified of spiders

- he saw one in the bathroom of his cabin and was completely moved in to a different cabin within seven minutes

- roier finds this hilarious

- foolish and vegetta are dating. no one knows how they got together or when they got together. if you ask either of them, you’ll get two completely different answers

- the brazilians join two-ish weeks in

- they all arrive together in a bus together and have already formed a Friendship on the journey there

- the bus was almost set ablaze 4-6 separate times (depends on your definition on separate)

- there is an extremely done cucurucho driving the bus

- forever sees phil and immediately turns to tell felps how that is the man of his dreams

- mike and pac are inseparable. they’re just kind of always within the vicinity of each other.

- cellbit, bad, foolish, and maximus attempt to take over the camp together. it doesn’t go as planned.

[holllandtrash]

ok so when i think of enemies to lovers, i generally imagine the guy being ruthless and someone who doesn’t mind being seen as a villain ,,,,,, so enemies to lovers with max or like red bull!seb would slap they’d also probably slap your ass in bed during delicious hate sex

ah i dont actually write seb, i love him but its just not in my wheelhouse im so sorry

but could you imagine max and driver!reader like what if shes the newest red bull driver and max hates her and she has to learn how to drive to max's set up bc well its his team and obviously the car is geared towards him and she struggles and max doesnt have the patience for it and will say "no comment" to every question in the media thats about her and then her first podium she gets third and max is first obvi and idk its carlos on second and carlos is so proud of her because all of the drivers on the grid admire her and he gives her one of those driver fist bumps/half hug things and pats her back in parc ferme and max just IGNORES HER says nothing doesnt even look at her and usually max is fine with putting his arm around the other drivers backs for photos but he stands with his hands folded behind his back, that smug smile because well, he got first so of course hes smug and she's got tears in her eyes because its her first podium with red bull, even if its not first place it feels like she won and she doesnt even care about max's treatment towards her until later that day when someone on her team points out how max completlely disregarded her and ignored her and shes like oh what the fuck i didnt even notice because she was on a high right and now that shes off that high shes PISSED because my god they're supposed to be a team, right? anyway you bet your ass she has WORDS for him the next time she sees him and if that happens to be in the middle of the paddock on media day at the next race and DTS just so happens to be filming well, lucky for them i guess not so lucky for the red bull racing team who now have a fire to put out

there were no periods in that and im so sorry but the idea was just flowing and i had to get it out

[mydemonsdrivealimo]

I was wondering how similar is your personality and/or background is to Jensen's? What do you have in common? Where are you polar opposites?

omfg i love this holy shit you have no idea. this is a long ass answer so im putting some of it under the cut :)

for personality, im also pretty blunt and to-the-point. it drives me fucking insane when people dont just say what they want to say, and ive purposefully had a lot of instances where jensen is the same way in the fic im working on. also, jensen is a very private person, and im the same way. generally, i tend to keep my characters pretty similar as far humor and demeanor, so i know a lot of that is the same

for opposites, jensen is much more willing to be fun and let go ig. hes not afraid to make a fool of himself from time to time. also, ngl im a bit meaner than jensen is. yes, we both call people out for their shit, but jensen does it with a lot more decorum asdfghjk. ive been told many times not to handle a problem because i come off much harsher than i mean to, but jensen would be asked to fix a problem yk

~~~

as far as background, we differ a lot in the literal sense, but i always tend to include some similarities for the underlying themes. one of the biggest examples is probably jensen's mom and his relationship to her

personally, im pretty sick and tired of seeing the storyline of perfect parents, murderer/evil parents, or dead parents. those tend to be some of the most popular tropes, and 99% of them are inaccurate. i want to see more good people who are bad parents, which is exactly how jensens mom is. not the funny, anecdotal "im a bad parent," but parents who have no idea how to handle a kid. i grew up around people who didnt know how to handle neurodivergency, and had short tempers, and thats something i wanted to show through jensen. yeah okay, they fight a lot and she barely knows how to talk to him, but they still love each other. no they dont talk much after he moves away, but they still love each other. they dont really like each other, but they love each other

even though they have all these problems, how they cant communicate effectively and inevitably piss each other off with most conversations, they still care about each other. jensen has plenty of problems he'll be dealing with late in life because of it, but he would rather have her in his life than not (and if somebody talks bad about her, you can bet on their ass getting handed to them)

overall, theres far more differences than similarities between our background, but i still wanted to show that middle-ground of parenting and its effects. as for differences, im not gonna put my whole life on display obviously, but our entire circumstances were different. jensens an only child with one parent in the house, and that alone is completely off from my own experience.

[7xwc]

honest opinions about the intro (that nobody asked for or cares) - driver by driver:

sargent: what does he even do? thank god it was just a second of him. 1/10

kmag: ok? like… you aint got nothing better to do? 1/10

zhou: baby we know you can serve. where's the energy girl? but gotta admit the second camera angle did something to me. 5/10 purely for the second shot

daniel: looks dumber than my left toe. 2/10

hulk: ngl that was pretty good considering he usually looks like a mcdonalds drive thru 5/10

bottas: slaaaaaaay!!!! love the energy, coming out of the shadow. love the hair. the only bitch that is not afraid to show off. 7/10 also bonus point for the stache 8/10

yuki: im disappointed. baby, we know you eat always and you never ever leave crumbs. what happened? who hurt you? poor baby looks like a cardboard cutout of himself i hate it here. 4/10

alex: stop. get some help. and a haircut. they deyassified him. also. what are you staring at buddy, look away pls. 2/10

ocon: SLAY! rent was due and the bills needed to be paid! the twinkle in his eyes, the strut, the bisexual lighting going across his face. this is cinema right there. 8/10

pierre: first of all: scoot back, buddy. why you trying to fight the camera? it wont bite you, yknow? absolutely not. 3/10

stroll: no rizz just a head full of head and brown eyes. didnt serve, didnt eat, matter of fact he aint even shown up to dinner. 2/10

piastri: ok buddy, next 2/10

george: omg hiiii sid from the ice age!!!! wtf is that middle part fix that shit right up pls. also why does he look like he is doing a cowboy walk? like, yknow the one, with the hands on the gun thingy. no. 2/10

carlos: boring as always. he literally just stood there. like okay girl you're so unique 1/10

lando: should've had more screen time. i wanna see them hips swinging boy. struting like rent was due. could have served face some more, he looks bored. 6/10

charles: YES! absolutely yes. he had two seconds and made the most of it. they just dont want to show a bad bitch for too long. side profile on point. cunty. shouldve winked. 9/10

alonso: i hate to say it but he served. the cunty stare? big beautiful green eyes? wow. the first angle not so much it did nothing for him but the second was GOOD!! 8/10

lewis: i mean. do i even need to say it? the rent was due, the bills needed to be paid, they took bono away and they were coming for his dog next, like… he cooked, served, ate AND did the dishes. like. wow. he's looking at the camera like he's about to jump and beat the shit out of it (metaphorically) like yes sir, kill them all. he got three different angles cuz they know they gotta feed the masses. 1000/10

checo: jumpscare. no. get away from my face. 1/10

m*x: was he cracking his knuckles? who are you about to fight my guy? the racism accusations? like? also how are you gonna have such beautiful eye color and still do nothing for no one? why you gotta be so fucking boring. you're the reinging champ my guy, it's not that hard to serve a cunty look into the camera??? guess you cant cheat your way into that one. -1/10 this one actually piss me off

[blackvail22]

9/22/23 — 1:20am

i hate wanting to be productive in the middle of the night. i was tired all day tdy, and now i just want to do something productive. no!!! i work earlier than usual tomorrow!!!!

im doing my skincare now... i wore makeup tdy so i have no choice but to do it 🤯

im tired still but i dont want to sleep. i feel like i havent been productive enough tdy even though i went to 3 different appointments and within the 2 hours before work i cleaned my bathroom sink (that was incredibly disgusting, i am not exaggerating. no one has cleaned it in like a little over a year. my dad shaves his face there whenever it gets like 5 inches long and doesnt clean the hair out of the sink/on the counter. its gross.), made ramen (it wasnt v good).... at work i walked around almost the whole 6 hours. my feet hurt so!! bad!! after i work. it happens every time. it doesnt help that when i fell down my stairs, my "sprained" foot didnt heal properly. i also hurt my hand at work and have not seen a doctor .... im ngl im like a mess and if i tell anyone abt this theyll tell me its because im fat and need to lose weight WE GET IT. I KNOW. IM TRYING, AND JUST BECAUSE I AM DOESNT MEAN THAT I CANT HAVE SMTH WRONG WITH ME?????

anyways

im tired. like mentally and physically. i had counseling tdy and i told her everything and the time still wasnt full. she shared some things abt her life recently... still didnt fill the time. she didnt respond much at all, but she's grieving, so i understand

im not telling anyone except u and my digital diary about my situation with my ex... i need to stop complaining to people abt him and making it everyones problem when its really my fault i keep letting him back in my life. its bad! ive literally had dreams where he did that *thing* but like in an extremely worse way, and i told myself that i just had to live with it, that i have to get used to it. and, i mean, i guess i do... if i can *** ***** then he can do whatever.

im not even with him... just flirting heavily. he picks up on it, i think so, anyway....

im tired

i saw that u updated ur music playlist you sent to me recently ! so heres a song for u in return

2:51am

idk why it pisses me off so bad but when b says shes ugly it makes me so angry. "why cant i be like the pretty girls?" she is the definition of a pretty girl... she may not see it because people were mean to her growing up but its like... ive cried SO much because of how pretty she is. my parents call her the pretty girl, people at school say shes pretty all the time... it just makes me so upset that someone as pretty as her cant see it. and i wish she could, honestly.

and i hate that this makes me so angry. i have so much envy that it rips me apart every second of the day, and i hate it!!!!! im the fat, ugly friend, and i always felt bad for her being friends with me. she says that im one of the prettiest ppl she knows.... if that were true, would she have deleted all the photos of me off of her phone? who knows. and the fact that people compliment her all the time at school and in public should say A LOT about how pretty she is. it happens all the time! and i mean all the time. maybe she doesnt think it was genuine or she forgets? idk... i think the last time a stranger complimented my appearance was a year and a half ago at a taco bell drive thru. the last time i was called pretty (besides when my mom says it) was at leastt 6 months ago. im like distraught because she is literally so beautiful fuck

this is going to make me cry myself to sleep because i cant say any of this to her because this is really just unhealthy of me, like the envy and making me seem like the victim. it just makes me so upset that everyone thinks shes pretty but herself

yeah im def crying myself to sleep gn i work in 11hrs which sounds like a long time from now but i havent slept yet lol

3:16am

ok i lied i messaged her and said "i saw you commented "i wish i was one of the pretty girls" on a tiktok, and i really need you to know that you are the pretty girl. youre so incredibly beautiful not only on the outside but the inside too... it can be rare to find someone like that. i hope youre able to see yourself through my eyes someday and see yourself for what you truly are—beautiful"

i hope it doesnt come off weird

ok i cried and messaged her i should rlly just sleep now