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inbabylontheywept · 2 months

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so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.

the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.

i had like, fifteen raw eggs.

i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.

except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.

so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.

#i feel a kinship with that snake #would that i could be a simple tube #and eat my fill of eggs #but being a person is rather nice too #my wife is a saint #and i promise that most of the time she is the goblin and i am the Serious Guy #but i had a little pique of insanity and you know what it was my junior year of college #and i deserved to just go a little insane #you spent 65 hours a week being Rational and then you go home and eat like twenty raw eggs

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sylvies-kablooie · 8 months

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i do unironically think the best artists of our generation are posting to get 20 notes and 3 reblogs btw. that fanfic with like 45 kudos is some of the best stuff ever written. those OCs you carry around have some of the richest backstories and worldbuilding someone has ever seen. please do not think that reaching only a few people when you post means your art isn't worth celebrating.

#i often wonder about how many things would be considered classic or high art had they only received the marketing #how many short films that were made for class could have been the most powerful thing you'd ever seen? if you'd seen them?#“you know the greatest films of all time were never made” etc etc #but like. these works of art ARE being made. it's just enjoyed by a smaller audience with equal impact though #i think about this one furry i used to follow on insta who had the coolest worldbuilding ever. it's been years.#thought prompted by that sketch of nimona from ten years ago that was just for a character design #posted to the creator's tumblr and now it's nominated for best animated feature film at the oscars #and by the genuine emotional reaction a fan comic made me feel. how much work had gone into it. how beautiful it was to me.#idk what to tag this but i hope whoever needs to hear it does #writing #writer #fandom #fandom culture #artist

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hinamie · 15 days

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to moving forward

#my art #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk fanart #jujutsu kaisen fanart #jjk art #yuji itadori #gojo satoru #fushiguro megumi #nobara kugisaki #itadori yuuji #megumi fushiguro #jjk spoilers #satoru gojo #jjk manga spoilers #hina.comic #before any1 says anything i KNOw his birthday is in december ik ik ik this is just 2 show some post-battle bonding after the trauma #its winter in canon n megumi's birthday has passed and he spent it being piloted like a mech so they need to celebrate Now!!#also this was technically a request lmao anon wanted megumi birthday angst hehehehhe i hope u like it <3 bc it KILLED ME DEAD #im going to collapse remember when i said this wasnt harder than the hydrangeas im having second thoughts #page 8 made me want to bash my head in #could have stuck with one flashback image could have left them monochrome could have done literally anything 2 ease the workload #but noooo the chronic overachiever in me would not allow it #rule of threes i had to include all of them and they Had to be in colour it wouldn't have hit the same if i had kept it monochrome #i needed it to look how childhood memories look i needed it to look oversaturated and hazy and fond but unmistakably Gone #it may have killed me but im so proud of this rn like from an art style perspective these megumis and yuujis r top tier by my standards #personal favourites r the first and last panel of crying megumi like not 2 pat myself on th back but expression?????? hello??????#enjoy your cake megumi you've earned it <333 sorry fr hurting ur feelings it will happen again #oh my god i can sleep tonight bless <333 and i met my 3 day deadline NICE im so good at what i do

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mynnthia · 4 months

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was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.

to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:

kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #kabru #kabru already added laios as a discord friend. everyone else in the server can see laios excitedly asking kabru to go with him #what would You even Do in this situation. how would YOU feel?#basically: kabru isnt a laios-hater! hes just in shock bc Thats His Trauma. the key part is kabru still says yes #bc he wants to get to know laios. to understand why laios would be so fascinated by something horrific to him #and ALSO bc even while in shock kabru can still tell laios has unique expertise + knowledge that Could be used for Good #even if kabru doesnt fully trust laios yet (bc kabru just started talking to the guy 2 hours ago. they barely know each other)#kabru also understands that getting to know ppl (esp laios) means having to get to know their passions. even if it triggers his trauma here #but thats too much to fit in this metaphor/analogy. this is NOT an AU! its not supposed to cover everything abt kabru or laios' character!#its a self-contained metaphor written Specifically to be more easily relatable+thus easy to understand for general ppl online #(ie. assumed discord users. hence why i said (a non-specific) 'discord server' and not something specific like 'car repair subreddit')#its for ppl who mightve not fully grasped kabru's character+intentions and think hes being mean/'chaotic'/murderous.#to place ppl in kabru's shoes in an emotionally similar situation thats more possible/grounded in irl experiences and contexts.#and also for the movie punchline #mynn.txt #dm text #crossposting my tweets onto here since my friends suggested so

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cyancees · 2 years

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i have neither a good imagination nor aphantasia, but a secret third thing

#adhd #doodles #show this to your therapist instead of failing to explain it like i did #me: its like i cant control my thoughts like i was trying to think of something earlier today but #all i could think of was this giraffe eating leaves and no matter how hard i tried to focus the thought would just. replay #my therapist: what happens if you try to let the thought just play out #me: ........ i dont know but i dont want it to be there at all when im trying to do simple addition in a maths exam #10k #100k

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chloesimaginationthings · 2 months

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The FNAF Vanessas meet their younger selves..

#myart #chloesimagination #comic #fnaf #five nights at freddy's #fnaf vanny #fnaf vanessa #vanessa shelly #vanessa afton #fnaf movie #security breach #fnaf fanart #MORE SCENE VANNY 🩵🩵🩵#also this is a semi sequel to the Mikes ver I made #seeing I think the Vanessas deserve the funny too 😤#I like to think Vanny would tell her younger self white lies #she knows at that age she just wanted to know life would get better for her #seeing teen her was stuck living with her awful father #Vanessa’s life does get hard again as an adult but.. SINCE HW2 I think she’s in a better place #finally stood up to her abuser and all so it does get better #WHILE MOVIE VANESSA …#bit more manic here BAHAH #listen if younger Vanessa loosen screws on her fathers suit #would anyone even know 🙏🏾#she could get away with it-#Movie Vanessa of course would want to prevent things anyway she can #the Afton kids always being a lil crazy is so real

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hoshizoralone · 3 months

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reflection

#anyways so i think samus has major survivors guilt and is a super perfectionist. The type of girl who reimagines scenarios in her mind #And thinks about how she could have done better. like ‘if i had woken up sooner maybe i could have saved everyone in prime 3’#so i think she says she doesnt know anything about herself because shes so hypercritical of her actions she doesnt see herself as a person #while also her hyper critical-ness shows how she says she wants to ignore herself but she literally cant because she has so many criticisms #oh i wanted to include the ppl from the prime 2 manga in that one shot but was like ‘i dont think ppl will recognize them’.#also lol the existence of dark samus would fuck her up SOOOO bad like it only exists bc she exists & its responsible for the gang’s deaths #okay im done rambling tldr MENTAL ILLNESS.#metroid #samus aran #loneart #metroid dread #metroid prime #super metroid #metroid series #i dont wanna tag all the games. There just those games is enough #hall of fame

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millenianthemums · 2 years

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i want a shirt that has a QR code on it for some kind of horrible malware so that if anyone ever tries to film me in public their phone will automatically scan the code and be reduced to a functionless brick

#text post #although testing if it works would be difficult #i’d need a spare phone or two #also i know qr codes don’t usually automatically scan but maybe one could if it was evil enough #1k

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marsipain · 26 days

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Norwegian Mikus :)

Left is Miku as a russ and right is Miku in a bunad!

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demigods-posts · 7 months

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i lowkey forget that percy's full name is perseus. and like. that name goes so hard. because it just sounds like this mf could kick your ass. like imagine you're a junior in high school and your teacher introduces a new student by the name of 'perseus jackson'. and before you even raise your head to look at the guy. you just know this mf could clock you.

#yeah sally definitely knew this too #sally 'i named my son perseus so he could have a happy ending' jackson #AND so ppl would know not to fuck with him just by hearing his name #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo text post #pjo #pjo headcanon #percy jackson #perseus jackson #goddddddd say his nameeeeee

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bbbbbbbbatman · 12 days

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Jason: I’m dating Roy

Bruce: Hmm (derogatory)

Jason: He has a daughter which makes you a grandad

Bruce: Hmm (delighted)

#i don’t actually think bruce would disapprove of roy #but it’s for the bit you know #jason: god how do I tell bruce that roy and I are dating #dick: just throw lian at him #jason: that could work #jayroy #jason todd #bruce wayne #batman #dc #dc comics #mine

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brainrotcharacters · 1 month

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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.

#i can't believe i'm saying this #DEADPOOL CAN GET IT #Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him #I would too bestie #it's the sass for me folks #paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god #a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think #this is a branch in realities i know it #i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie #all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME #camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch #i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction #i love how you love deadpool #deadpool #wolverine #deadpool and wolverine #wade wilson #logan howlett #poolverine #deadclaws #don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here #@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating #do it again #gif is credit to the owner #30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update #damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here #guys just find my other post

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technically-human · 2 months

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It's not complicated, it's just weird

#payneland #edwin x charles #dead boy detectives #dbda #this is not realistic honestly #because charles would protest the use of the word rejection #how could he ever reject any part of his best mate am i right?#also rip random client who asked #u didn't know better man

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cheekedupwhiteboy · 1 month

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#sorry for the lame illustration. tumblr. you know #if i could put a photo of a real one i would. hard mode (not hard actually)

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turtleblogatlast · 3 months

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Leo learns something about himself 🏳️‍⚧️

Based roughly on this old post.

Bonus:

[Leo is taking the fact that he was born biologically female simultaneously very well and also not so well but overall he’s mostly coping with the fact that it was Draxum that just essentially gave him the turtle equivalent of ‘The Talk’.]

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rise leo #trans leonardo #trans leo #rottmnt headcanons #turtle art tag #rise draxum #happy pride everyone~#if you’re wondering why there’s no backgrounds that’s because my files got messed up so just blankness in the bg sorry #but yeah!#this is forever and always my fav headcanon for Leo it makes too much sense to me #I wanted to make sure I got it done in time for pride haha #I don’t know if it’s obvious by the end but Draxum ran off because he was for once doing something nice for Leo #that being leading him somewhere else not in front of everyone so Leo can process the fact that he was born female in peace haha #(but he also just - wanted to avoid the ensuing awkward Talk as long as he could lol)#“how would Leo NOT know’’ he had an inkling but never thought much of it because he’s a teenage turtle mutant with no access to healthcare #also yeah that’s splinter’s hand at the end there I just KNOW he’d want those pics #also also - Leo here can technically be trans or even intersex in some way too #both is good #making this made me remember why I never do color #at least for comics #it just takes sooo long #but it was fun and worth it for my fave hc #this is like the first time I’ve drawn Draxum and man he’s kinda hard to draw #also their sizes are just 1 2 and 3 because Draxum had a simple system in place for sizing his subjects #(aka I was too lazy to think of anything else to put there)#also dunno if anyone noticed but look at Raph’s paper and look at his baby’s self’s photo

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chloesimaginationthings · 1 month

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This could be a kart if FLAF wasn't fucking around..

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