#but like!! theres more to the podcast that just romance!!

[sapphofrog]

self care is blocking ppl who complain abt gloria scott and whine abt how theyre no longer listening to s&co bc of the (not even comfirmed romantic) johnmariana implications

[weaselmcdiesel]

i find your "katnep wouldnt work in canon" claim extremely incorrect!!!! they have shared interests and a themetaic connection. its just a shame that their dynamic wasnt explored much but their contrasting personalities are suuuch fanfic bait to me

You're definitely right about fanfic bait i think, i'm not the most clever when it comes to literary analysis so im listening to the podcast "homestuck made this world" and one topic it discusses is how the introduction of the trolls helped the comic breach YA novel status and how the fandom at the time was slowly shifting to accepting more shipping due to the new emphasis on character's interpersonal relations right. nepeta the character is also literally a representation of the shipping population of the fandom too so it's not unrealistic to think hussie wanted to push that ship (not to mention the disciple x signless haha)

unfortunately, i consider the ship near impossible due to the fact that karkat would have to go though a completely different char. development route to 1. learn how to reject/respond to nepeta's crushing instead of just ignoring her, and 2. somehow start liking her back? which idk it would require nepeta to be alive and i just dont know how that would look XD (thus why i draw them... in a completely different universe pahaha...)

but you ARE correct! not only do they share the interest in romance n would love reading romances together, but just like karkat nepeta really does care about the rest of their friends. even when she knew some sorta considered her weird or werent treating her nicely she would still be concerned for them. she WOULD support karkat when he felt like no one's listening to him when he just wants to help everyone. idk theres a lot there. imagine if nep survived after gam killed equius? and then saw karkat pacify gamzee like i wonder how she'd react to that

sorry for writing a lot im in love with them you must understand asdjf

[strawbs-screaming]

☆ pizza pasta / pete zapasta headcanons ☆

i want to watch him sob. Im running out of normal things to say about the men im violently woobifying and its not fun

- after his boxing days were over, he started to work as a real estate agent and part time model

- did a fuck ton of jobs before his real estate shithole, including: chef, model, actor, lawyer and most importantly, podcast haver

- Really sensitive but likes to call it "being in touch with his emotions" When hes just a really big crybaby

- Really emotional, way more than the normal person, hes willing to cry over sad movies, romance movies and anything dramatic in general

- kept in touch with no one, and i mean NO ONE. No one knows where he went, no one knows where he is now, everyone just assumes him to be dead, theres a joke going on that he had memory loss and is now living in belgium

- gathers with his sad cringe fail uncool not swag non cash money babygirl sad noodle friends and have soup together while talking about being sad little men who are babygirl

- has insomnia (stop with the projecting moe im begging you) that ends with him eating cold spaghetti in the dark, on the kitchen floor at 2 AM before passing out

- Really animated, you could tell him the most tragic, depressing, heart shattering news and he would go "OH NO OH MAMA!!" Before crying hysterically on the floor, he literally emotes

[wall-e-gorl]

Audio Drama Podcasts to Listen to Based Off of Unprepared Casters Arcs

Some spoilers for the arcs and pods and also im not consistent in the explanations, you just have to trust me bro ♡ also i dont mention everything so follow the link on your fav arc(s) at least please

Arc 1, Dragons in Dungeons

Inn Between

You want classic dnd? This is classic dnd. Inn Between tells the story of a dnd adventuring party (no this isn't an actual play) in the moments between the adventure. The adventure is only seen in the previously on/up coming section and if it happens to go on in the Inn. Character focused, you really get to delve into the characters (and the meta players! See arc 7*)

Arc 2, Lovejoy's Four

Second Star to the Left

This is for the fans of the gay cats. Space romance between a scout explorer preparing a planet for settlement and her scout minder, a voice in her ear for a couple hours a week. theres some crime, no cats, and a lot about connections between people.

Arc 3, Gonna Raise Hell

The Strange Case of Starship Iris

Gay Smugglers in Space are trying to solve a mystery and then take down a big power thats not doing whats best for its people. this also could have worked for arc 2 but its here instead for the crew and their history together.

Arc 4, Orb is Life

In Transit

Listen. im not a sportsball person. have a space murder mystery/mystery. it relates i promise

Arc 5, Lives of the Party

Someone Dies in this Elevator

Theres Always An Elevator And Someone Always Dies.

Arc 6, The Glacerian Trail

What Will Be Here?

I havent actually listened to wwbh, but its about building and living on a doomed planet. Which feels fitting to the arc where people are trying to survive against the odds, and in Beryl's case, how to live with the odds.

Arc 7. Wizards off the Coast

Inn Between

Surprise! This one's on here twice, this is one of my favorites so I feel no guilt about it. For arc 7 I specifically recommend season 3 and 4, just because it's a new group with the same meta players! We know it's the same group playing dnd and we can start to see threads between their characters, that we will get to see if it continues into season 5 with the other new party we get to meet. It's not the same as a group returning as the same characters but its similar enough imo. Really though, I recommend the whole show

Arc 8, The King is Dead

RADIO: Outcast

This ones kinda a wild card. a western for the high politics? yea uh its on here because i dont listen to high politics but i think the people who like the character dynamics will find this interesting as well.

Arc 9, Once Upon a Crime

Starfall

Storybook fae magic with your coworkers-turned-family. need i say more

Arc 10, Daggers Out

Re: Dracula

This ones not out yet. It's the podcast version of Dracula Daily, but with all the add ons that podcasts have. Voice actors, sound effects, editing to remove the unnecessary bigotry, soundtracks, ect ect. I put this here for the vampires, just go check out their tumblr honestly

[neopuff]

Hey, so I saw that Vax and Keyleth is one of your least favorite ships. I’m curious, would you mind expanding more on that? I also prefer them to be shipped with others, but I’m wondering if for you it’s a list of reasons or if it’s just “this doesn’t vibe with me.”

well not least favorite out of all ships, just casually dislike. i just found them really out of nowhere and uninteresting lol

like according to Everyone, theres a lot of buildup in the podcast that justifies it. but since i have no interest in the podcast and have just seen the show + read the comics, and since the show is technically its own continuity 'cause of all the little changes theyve made, it does really take away from their romance

i also get very tired of the Bisexual Person Will Fuck Anyone But Their True Love Will Always Be The Opposite Sex trope. i mean thats two of the main ships in this show but i wasnt rly interested in scanlan/pike either (i like them better in s2 but i also really like vax/scanlan because of s2)

anyway yeah just kind of thought it wasnt written in a way that gave me any reason to be interested or invested. i still remember how fucking confused i was when he told her he's in love with her. i sat there going ???????????????????

[seraph5]

THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES SPOILERS. Ok my Magnus feelings ok. First of all I want to roll up a newspaper and bat Alex on the nose for not letting Johnny do the first half of season 5 as an office romance. I know it would have ruined the pacing I know BUT I DON'T CARE. Don't get me wrong the bits of fluff they did include were so cute and sweet and good and I'm glad they're in there but i want more *grabby hands*. 

I was so blown away and impressed that the spider had been behind the tapes. I did sort of guess it around the beginning of season 4 but it was still so impressive that there were so many layers of meta over the top of each other and that they folded down so neatly in the end. Elias's scheme. The web's scheme. The fact that love was what was the lynchpin that brought it all down but in a very sort of brutal and tragic way. Not in a love conquers all way. I don't know if I've ever seen love used in that way. I was sad to see Martin and John's relationship kind of struggle so hard at the end there and have their story 'finish' in that way (protocol bring my bebs back to meeeeee). 

I don't feel as upset about the ending as I thought I would. I think because I thought John would die and this wasn't exactly dying. I feel like John's choice was disappointing but also made 100% sense with what we knew about his character. I feel like season 4s end was way, way more powerful. An absolute gut punch. Staggering reveal. 'Ending' a horror podcast has to be so difficult. How do you finish a scary but nuanced and complicated story? Most horrors end tragically. I think this was maybe the best way to wrap it up. Our precious John and Martin 'loose' the world 'wins' but in a way that feels sad. 

I feel really conflicted because as a follow creative and as a narrative lover I'm supremely impressed and happy and feel like everything was somehow done incredibly right and well. As a listener I just feel kind of oh we lost John, Martin and the buck was passed to some other unsuspecting universe at the end. There's a cosmic tragedy in that. WHICH IS SO PERFECT FOR HORROR THO UGHHHH.  

I also have to say I adore that 'blow things up' is the go to solution on Magnus. So many supernatural stories are like 'theres this dagger and it was dipped in the blood of a mysterious antichrist, lost for centuries but now hidden in a tomb-' Magnus is like 'Gertrude says C4'. As a solution it's so elegant and makes so much sense as a response to fear as an adversary. It's so grounded and real and non-supernatural. It feels like a continuation of the way Basira handles things.

I'm so happy Basira made it. It makes so much sense to me that she'd be one of the ones. God Gang I'm starting to listen to the many q and as and breakdowns now but I am supremely pleased protocol is coming this year. While I'm sad I wasn't listening along when it was first coming out I'm glad I have protocol to look forward to. 

I may still do a bit more art (I honestly have so many thumbnails of ideas for these characters drawn up). Thanks to anyone who has been liking my little reacts. It's been a pleasure to not be alone. Having said that bombarding my brother with messages about it has been fun. We listened to most of the season finales together and I almost listened to one without him once and this is how that went down haha

[dykeyote]

🎥 TPP for the hyperfix ask game!!

a favorite scene: honestly i really do adore the gameshow scene in murderous mask from the moment cecil starts talking to him sobbing at the end its GREAT . cecil is such a fun character who's voice acted incredibly well his dynamics with both leads are really funny ESPECIALLY w the twist that he thinks him and juno are besties theres a bunch of really good interactions and lines and it just does a Really good job of like . catching you up in the Spectacle of it all despite not being able to see anything bc its not a visual medium . plus its like FUNNY but the longer you think abt it and analyze it the more interesting it becomes so you CAN analyze it and make yourself all sad abt the kanagawa twins OR!!!!! you can listen to the episode and be like lol silly little guy . and i like that versatility ....

other scenes i liked a lot include (and ignore if i describe any of these a little wonky its been a long time since ive listened to most of these . these are from memory)

the bit where juno goes to speak to ramses but just finds all the notes . INCREDIBLY good scene season two is imo the best season by a decently large margin and this scene is like the epitome of why thats the case

the dream sequence in the promised land . interesting and also kinda hysterical in the nureyev section

when the theia makes him shoot at the end of the promised land

the scene where juno leaves at the end of season one . im sure everyone understands why that scene goes crazy

the entire thing w the proctor i luv the proctor my underrated womanfreak . would be higher if my least favorite character in the show wasnt there.......

the entirety of the third rita minute it makes me giggle and also my blorbo is (kinda) there

nureyev killing mag in angel of brahma (and that entire ep tbh i luvvvv angel of brahma)

any interaction juno has w alessandra bc a: its interesitng b: i love lesbians and c: i love seeing the protag of a popular podcast engage in sapphic behaviors even if its not the main romance

nureyev being fucking pissed off in man in glass i luvd man in glass just because hes insufferable and its GREAT . luv it

speaking of man in glass: buddy and nureyev's interaction in that ep, and honestly any time they interacted Ever i think theyre so interesting

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

i think im aroace. i fit some of the criteria and generally i just have a very complicated and lengthy relationship with romance. im usually romance favorable except when im not. sometimes i feel like i cant be arospec because im not the same as my friends who are also aro. its somewhat disheartening because ive spent so much of my life wanting romance and wanting relationships and wanting to experience dating culture and i thought id get to have it one day because im capable of liking people sometimes but i cant handle it when someone likes me back and i know it cant be commitment issues because i have absolutely no qualms committing to platonic friendships and moderately sized life decisions but theres just something in the way of me having a normal allo love experience and i know this identity is something i should be proud of and sometimes it is! i absolutely love looking through the tags on tumblr and i love that i have a unique way of experiencing feelings and this label really does make me so happy! but i cant help but yearn for a simpler existence. why cant it just be a case of liking a guy called daniel and then him liking me back and then we date and break up and then i go for a one-night stand with a girl called melissa and then we date and break up and date again and i meet her parents and i tell her i love her and then we grow old together. ive just always wanted something straight out of a tv show or book or whatever but the world just looks so much narrower now and it feels so much harder to find someone that it can work out with. i dont know. i hate amatonormativity. and sorry for the negative energy. i just kinda needed to get this off my chest. thank you for the safe space.

For being different than your aro friends, it's important to remember the aro spectrum is really diverse. There's a lot of different ways to be aro. So when trying to figure out if the label is right for you or not, I wouldn't factor that in too much, instead I'd focus more on things like is the label useful for you? Do you feel a connection to it? Does alloromantic feel wrong to you? Because being alloromantic encompasses so many things, there's so many ways to fall outside that mold. So remember this is your journey, keep asking yourself what makes sense for you.

It's OK to have negative feelings about possibly being aro, or about not being able to have that allo-normative romance you thought you would. This can be a big adjustment for some people, not everyone can just say 'oh I'm aromantic and I'm going to live a different life than I thought I did/not have a lot of experiences I thought I would' and not be affected by that (some people do have different experiences, but it's really not unreasonable to have to work at dealing with that.)

Sometimes you need to mourn the life and experiences you thought you'd have. Sometimes it takes a little while to reframe your goals and expectations in life. Sometimes I like to say being aro often means forging your own path rather than following the one laid out for you, that can be really exciting learning about yourself and figuring out what you do excited by and want to do, but it's scary too. And it's OK to have all these feelings.

I think what you're doing right now though going through tumblr tags and finding a side of aro that you enjoy is really great and really good first step. Finding some blogs you like or some aro-centric media may help too (look into books and podcast lists, because that seems to be where the most aro characters are these days). This is always helpful, no matter where you land, because it just normalizes being aro, and makes it feel a lot less scary.

The other thing is just take your time. You're figuring out a lot of things right now, you don't have to rush anything. Things will get easier as you figure more out and you start to understand yourself better.

Feel free to send in another ask if you have more questions or want to talk more.

All the best!

[thejaymo]

Digital Narration from Apple Books

Apple just launched digital narration service using voice synthesis!

From the Forbes article:

The initial target: long-tail books that will never be worth paying a human narrator for.

“More and more book lovers are listening to audiobooks, yet only a fraction of books are converted to audio — leaving millions of titles unheard,” Apple says. “Many authors — especially independent authors and those associated with small publishers — aren’t able to create audiobooks due to the cost and complexity of production.”

Apple is releasing four voices to start, two female and two male. Voices are optimized for specific genres of books, so Jackson is intended for fiction or romance with a deep, somewhat husky voice, while Helen is a soprano designed for nonfiction and self-development.

If you click though to the Apple authors announcement you can hear samples of the 4 voices. They are in my opinion, extremely listenable.

Understandably, I've seen a lot of people railing against the move. People worried about putting voice actors / narrators out of work. Other commentators question listener fatigue and the sort of attention level that can be given to an AI generated voice over a long period. But also, good for small authors, the cost of producing and audio book (even if you do it yourself) is colossal. I think AI voiced long tail / self published books will be really popular.

I know people (Ross I'm looking at you) who use over cranked TTS voiceover voices to read PDFs and other non fiction to them in the car when they are driving around, this voices are much more natural and will be popular if *built in* to devices int he near future.

Growing up in the 90's AI / Computers speaking were supposed to sound like HAL, Marvin the Robot or Stephen Hawking.

Instead we got the the TikTok lady. Which had its own crazy 'ethics in AI model creation' story a few years ago.

I was thinking recently that the TikTok lady has - at this point - got to be the most famous voice in the western world? An order of magnitude more famous than any living person surely?

Also I'm still laughing about the 'Boiling my husband alive in oil 🥰' post I reblogged yesterday.

Anyways, I built my own voice model last year using the 10's of hours of podcast's I've recorded. I've been sneakily using it for replacement here and there in my new interview show. Unless you looked at my working files, no one will ever ever know. I wonder how many professional voice actors who narrate for a living also have their own custom models too?

Whats interesting to me about Apple's move is the 4 voices optimised for different kinds of genre out the gate?

The chirpy upward inflection of the TikTok lady voice is optimised to deliver meaning as clearly as possible inside the typographic container of TikTok's media environment.

Audiobook producers of course have been making casting decisions for years around content and narrator but it seems significant to me that right out the gate there are certain kinds of voices best suited for certain kinds of content?

Theres a big difference of course between hearing and listening (cf Pauline Oliveros, R. Murray Schafer, Deep Listening etc).

Comprehension is always an active process. The philosopher Mortimer J. Adler talks about how teaching and learning are a reciprocal process

“Just as teaching will not avail unless there is a reciprocal activity of being taught, so no author, regardless of his skill in writing, can achieve communication without a reciprocal skill on the part of readers.”

The same is also true of effective storytelling. There is the teller of stories and the person being told.

I want AI voice Narration to be turned up to 11 - tomorrow. The optimisation of Human-Like voices to deliver meaning I'm convinced could be pushed a lot further.

Why not create a Human-Like voice that is optimised to deliver meaning at 2/3x speeds?

What does a synthesised voice that reaches 'I know kung-fu' levels of comprehension to a willing and active listener even sound like?

At that level of speed and active comprehension do we need to tweak for realism or optimise for something else?

[clockworkcheetah]

listening to beatrix greene (and prior to that i was listening to gods & lies)

theyre good but they both have some really flat romance subplots that feel so forced in and take away from the actually interesting main plots

theyre also both by realm... i hope thats not gonna be a recurring theme

[uwumessenger]

random headcanons i have for each om! character teehee

hi it's been a while since ive posted some hcs bc uni has been kicking my a$$! luckily i only have a few papers to tidy up and im done. here r some hcs for each obey me character that ive accumulated over the past few months wink wonk

most are random but some constants you'll find are what i think they smell like, languages they can speak (other than their native (demon/angel) and eng/jp), and music tastes !

lucifer

i have a strong feeling that he showers twice a day: in the morning after waking up and at night before going to bed

his cologne is probably the type that will last in an elevator for like a week after he uses it once. i dont think this mf ever smells like anything other than his cologne

has a secret folder on his phone of semi-nudes and other scandalous pics from when he felt sexy at the time omg

aside from demon language/eng/jp he can speak french and knows latin

listens to classical stuff yea but he also listens to diavolos mixtapes (re: diavolo's section)

not a fan of sweets but will eat sweet things when craving

really bland sense of humor...borderline cringey 😭✋🏻

mammon

has gone to google images and searched for "inspirational quotes tumblr" "gold aesthetic tumblr" & "relatable crush post tumblr" then reposts it onto his socials or just taps thru them and giggles bc he relates

his cologne doesnt last as long as lucifers and probably smells common. he has to reapply a lot but it's a people pleasing smell. it's cheaper hence the constant reapplying

he probably does have an expensive bottle but is the type to totally overspray...eek

he is canonically a car guy 🥲 and probably tells the one in his room good morning & good night + kisses the hood every once in a while. has tons of car magazines

he doesnt really speak other languages but has attempted to learn spanish before

listens to whatever is on the radio. doesnt rly stan anyone but he eventually will listen to mc's playlist and mc's playlist ONLY

levi

lurks on mc's socials ALL THE TIMEEEE like he will rewatch ur stories and scroll thru ur feed and overanalyze ur tweets/rts or blog posts. if ur mc isnt the type to use sns much he still googles ur name all the damn time just to find any sites u might be on fjdjdjdjskks

probably streams on whatever youtube or twitch devildom site equivalent there is, but only has like 40 or so followers. which he is okay with!

until he sees someone else who gets more attention than him. then the envy starts kicking in bad. especially if they suck 🧍🏻‍♀️

classic gamer boy smell. you know, sweat, tears, must, and (sometimes) axe deodorant. lucifer has to do a scent check before he goes out to any event & lets him use his cologne. how sweet!

kpop stan!! more girl groups than anything and his ults are probably GIRLS GENERATION, wonder girls, twice, loona, & red velvet

cried when ioi disbanded and refused to leave his room. the only thing u could hear was downpour on loop at full blast

can also speak korean & communicate in echolocation like dolphins 😏

satan

listens to country music you cant change my mind

smells like whatever environment he is in. he doesnt really have a designated smell just throws some deodorant on and goes about his day.

he's sooooo bad at driving...gets road rage way too often so his license has been REVOKED

but hes totally a backseat driver. needs to be sedated on long trips

do not let him watch finding nemo when luke asks to watch it. it's not worth it. he will cause mass destruction.

if he was a human or lived long term in the human world he totally has the ability to be a doctor

is studying as many languages as possible, but he mostly knows latin & french & german etc etc. wants to learn all the dead languages out of curiousity

asmo

dont think this mf has ever held down a relationship. ever

he doesnt compromise much & is not willing to change his lifestyle to fit an s/o into it. you keep up with how he lives or it just isnt meant to be (but dont worry! he'll eventually learn...maybe,,,,)

has the hardest time out of everyone when it comes to breaking bad habits

his smell varies bc he uses a variety of perfumes (whatever is the most popular at the time) but he probably sticks to floral and fresh scents. he never uses generic people pleaser scents like mammon

listens to electropop, mainstream pop, & some alternative rock

as for languages he too knows french, spanish, italian, etc. in general, if it's a romance language he knows it!

opposite of lucifer in the sense where he loves sweets and will refrain from eating too many bitter things

i think we all know that asmo is the biggest rockstar of the group! he's probably been in a boy band at least once, but now he makes his own music

has tried to teach mammon how to sing once. ended up in a broken piano and bleeding ears...

beel

i feel like he is SO SHY

like unless ur close to him he will not start conversations or anything

i think he listens to r&b a lot ! and jazz 😎 maybe rock as well

smells like ur typical athlete with undertones of wet wipes. he carries them around bc he likes to clean his hands before he eats & is prepared for when theres no sink nearby

he can drive and he drives really well. no rough turns, parallel parks perfectly, and never has problems with merging

driving with beel is probably really soothing. left hand is steering the other is gripping ur thigh 😫

dont think hes really fluent in any other language but hes probably semi fluent in korean because levi wanted beel to help him out

definitely know how to order food in practically every language tho HAHAHA

belphie

he reminds me of randall from monsters inc

smells kinda musty IM SORRY but not the way levi does hes more like the kind of musty u feel or smell when it's a shitty morning

but that's only because hes so lazy, when he cleans up hes like satan

has definitely murdered multiple people before. mc is not the first 😐✋🏻

with that being said belphie has been put into prison at least twice when visiting the human world, the mf had such a strong hatred for humans theres no way he never got into trouble before

lucifer probably broke him out and they used the pen thingies from men in black to erase everyones memory of that 🙄

dont think he listens to anything other than music that'll put him to sleep. really likes lazy song by bruno mars but thinks that bruno mars put too much effort into the song. should have been one acapella verse and then finish

similar to beel hes only semi fluent in one language, probably french bc of lucifer. doesnt remember much but knows a couple of lullabies and bedtime stories

the sandman used to be his bff until they drifted. they do, however, like and comment on each other's sns posts.

diavolo

once he found out who nicki minaj was he became her #1 stan

def an ariana grande stan too 😌

choreographs dances when hes stressed...idk just seems like a diavolo thing to do

also makes rly bad soundcloud rap music sometimes. turns to poetry when hes feeling emo but only lucifer knows this. barbatos is suspicious of him but doesnt have enough evidence to confirm.

his dad is like hudson abadeer from adventure time aka marceline's dad? something must have influenced him to want to unite the 3 realms + he would need the approval to do so, so his dad must be more chill than all the others before him 🧍🏻‍♀️ IDK ok anyway

currently going through his hamilton phase bc of mc. whether mc's intent was to get him hooked onto it or just to explain it bc of something he saw online, he tells everyone that he found out abt it bc of mc!

this man cannot drive his skills are only second to jumin han

not too fond of many languages but knows the widely spoken ones like spanish, mandarin, etc. if it's taught in high school he knows it

smells like a las vegas casino. not sure why but i feel like he does. but there's also an interesting & nice smell to him if he embraces you. it's a smell you cant quite identify. but it smells nostalgic, it's mysterious, and it's tempting.

barbatos

very calm demeanor but underneath hes WILD hes probably done everything at least once oof

he just has a lot of control and stability over himself (must be nice!)

on a more angsty note i feel like he might have had his heartbroken sO BAD IDK he is hurting and maybe that's why hes so willing to obey diavolo and not abuse his time lord power thingies bc he learned his lesson the hard way

mans is so smart he knows every language you could switch languages mid conversation with him and he wouldnt be thrown off. he'd probably start speaking it too.

BUT HE SPEAKS VIET P E R F E C T L Y

listens to the same stuff as lucifer but also likes eminem. likes the movie 8 mile but criticized it heavily

have you ever been to a chinese herb shop? naturally, he smells like that. his room probably smells like it too. he doesnt really have a significant smell like some of the others

when he bakes he smells like whatever hes baking tho

one of the few out of everyone listed to have been able to travel to literally everywhere

solomon

was probably on kitchen nightmares once, but only to get feedback from chef gordon ramsay. then he used his magic to prevent the episode from airing...

was in an orchestra, one of the best times of his life. played the violin. asmo watched him in the audience once, but didnt approach him until well after that performance.

he CANNOT sing. he can, however, rap.

doesnt listen to music. he listens to podcasts! but every now and then he turns on background music, but prefers it to be instrumental stuff

never wears sunglasses. also does not have a driver's license. cannot drive a regular car. could maybe fly an airplane.

due to his immortality he has learned almost every language to exist, but finds himself speaking mandarin the most. knows most dialects too

similar smell to barbatos but u can also smell some sunscreen on him too. like, generic beach day suncreen

he has a lot of pact marks, so he once had the idea to match foundation to his skin. it took him two weeks but he eventually perfected a combination. yes he will help u find ur perfect shade if u ask him to

simeon

another country music man. has also made a tiktok or two to that one song that goes "he cant even bait a hook." they are private tho

angel country music exists and simeon invented it

if he visits the human world and wears more causal clothing he probably tucks his shirt into his pants

wears a speedo at the beach i tell u, speedo at the beach

he can speak german...i can feel it

uses his pointer finger to type and holds the phone like 2 inches away from his face so sometimes his nose will push a key hence all his typos

has no signature smell. he simply smells like your favorite scent all the time. if multiple people are around him at once, everyone smells a different smell. it's pretty rad

"what does he smell like to himself?" u may be asking. hmm...a church? 💀

luke

his first pet was a goldfish and a few months before the exchange program happened, he was given a koi pond!

secretly likes hanging out with levi sometimes just to play with henry. makes him miss his pet fish back home

so his favorite movie is probably finding nemo and he threw a fit when nemo touched the butt

luke is probably learning german bc of simeon, though he'd like to learn more of the dead languages just for fun

i dont think he listens to music often or has any preferences, he just listens to whatever is playing on the radio

but he finds himself listening to the music mc listens to

smells like freshly baked goods all the time. or fresh laundry. but like, not combined. just depends on the day

[asexualbookbird]

July August September OCTOBER Wrap Up

I forget the last time I did this so I'm just going to talk about life in general and wrap up food and books for October!

So yall know by know this year has been Awful to me, and October really hasn't been too different. I've got a couple new words to add to list of diagnoses but that doesn't matter when I still feel like shit! I haven't felt like reading, and my hands hurt too much to do much of anything, but honestly October was the best month I had in a while (though it still sucked lol)

BOOKS

The Bone Maker by Sarah Beth Durst 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Across the Green Grass Fields by Seanan McGuire 🌟🌟🌟

The Lights of Prague by Nicole Jarvis 🌟🌟🌟

I really enjoyed The Bone Maker, so much so I want more like it, but not in the necromancy kind of way. More in the "found family grieving together but apart and learning once more its okay to lean on each other" kind of way

Green Grass Fields was fun, I always enjoy a Wayward Children story, but it ended very abruptly. I felt like we needed a bit more of a conclusion than what we got. I'm sure we'll see Reagan again in future books and get that conclusion, but on its own I needed More.

Lights of Prague was one of my most highly anticipated books, not just of the year, but of the last two years! The release kept getting pushed back because of ~Unprecedented Times~ so I was really looking forward to it! While it was still good, it wasn't at all what I expected. I wanted more monsters and less romance and the timeline was too rushed for my tastes. Also the romantic conflict was solved too easily, sorry but I don't believe someone would be all lovey eyed and apologetic mere hours after storming out of the bedroom vowing to kill the person if they ever met again. It had a satisfying ending though!

OTHER MEDIA

MBMBaM

Love Live SIF

Love Live SIP (season one)

QUBE 2

There's Someone Inside Your House

yall im caught up on MBMBaM and don't know what to do on walks now. Obviously the answer is "start a new podcast" but how can I when theres no more MBMBaM binging (bingeing?). I'll probably go back to TAZ and then The Magnus Archives.

Still playing School Idol Project, though with the recent Persona Collab I'm not sure how long that will last. The collab....sucks so much. We have to play the same song like twenty times in a row to progress and I hate it the songs are so boring Persona has awful boring music and the art is ugly and we have to pay to get the good cards. I play almost exclusively on master though so that feels good! Surprisingly it doesn't hurt my hands, though getting full combos is hard when my thumbs are stiff. I also watched season one of the anime and oh gosh I loved it so much!

QUBE 2 was a quick game that reminded me of Portal. Probably won't play it again like I did Portal, but it was a fun puzzle game.

There's Someone Inside Your House on netflix was disappointing and I'm still angry about it because the killer had NO MOTIVE at ALL other than "weh I have privilege you don't know how hard that is on me" lol shut up and go kill your dad like a normal asshole

FOOD

sticky buns

chicken katsu

bread rolls

falafel

dutch apple pie

grilled chicken

chocolate chip muffins

bagels

cranberry muffins

mint chocolate chip cookies

spaghetti and meatballs

challah

oh I did cook a lot huh! I didn't eat a lot, but I sure cooked it. If you want my cookie recipe you can find that here.

I'm very behind in my goodreads goal but hopefully I can fix that?? It's been suggested I get minor surgery soon to check to see whats going on inside of me, so I'll have recovery time for that to read. In theory. In practice I'll probably watch youtube and scroll through twitter.

Anyway happy November, time is fake, don't forget to buy half price Halloween candy!

[caedogeist-rights]

Podcasts ranked by the amount of kissing/gross sounds in it (and also how romance-repulsed/aromantic-friendly it is), by me, your neighborhood aro and hater of Body Sounds. Spoilers ahead for every single podcast listed!

(also, this got long, so uh. see under the break for the full list.)

1. Time:Bombs: The Perfect Podcast, not a gross foley, kiss, or romance-heavy plot in sight. I’ve got nothing bad to say about it, im sorry. It’s perfect.

2. Northwest Footwear Database: It is beauty, it is grace, it has got no Weird Sounds (unless you count a banging song and in-depth discussions of shoes. which i do not). A weird fiction podcast, so not Perfect in the listening, but... still #2 for a reason.

3. RQG: it is a ttrpg podcast. theres very obviously no kissing foley here. Thank G-d, is all im saying. Also has a QPP with a PC, and i give every budding romance an aro thumbs up!

4. Wolf 359: I don’t remember any terrible sounds, there’s no explicit romance- overall, a Good One! 1/2 a point taken off for the mental image of freezer-burned doug.

5. Kaleidotrope: oh, if there ever was a good podcast! This podcast is also kinda obsessed with love, which is nice, but focuses on romantic love for 90% of it, which is less so. Oh kaleidotrope... you need some aros.

6. TSCOSI: I adore this podcast! this is a wonderful podcast with wonderful characters, and I enjoy the ace rep! However, the torture scene in the s1 finale was... less enjoyable. 1 minute of Terrible, but it counts. (we have entered one-strike-territory)

7. The College Tapes: I am filled with adoration, but also, the book and cult chanting is creepy and unnerving. Also, the sheer volume of romantic pining was... overwhelming. Didn’t hate it, but not The Aro Friendly Podcast of my dreams.

8. Mabel: I do not remember much of this podcast, except I enjoyed it and there was some foley that was uncomfortable. Overall, not bad, but... a romance-focused plot, no matter how much I love it, with uh. Weird Sounds.

9. Archive 81: behold, my favorite podcast! Why, you may ask- oh, it simply is the Weird Shit Aro Haven of my dreams! Not a kiss or romantic plot to be found (some of yall ship chris and lee, and i support you, but i never interpreted them as romantic, so It Doesn’t Count on this list). However. the heart-eating scene. the s2 surgery scene. the concept of half the characters? the definition of body horror. Gross! (we have entered into the couple-strikes territory)

10. Stellar Firma: much like a81, perfect except for just one thing, and in this case, its the foot kink shit. Please listen to stellar firma, but also. Hartro’s Foot Kink. I give it my aro sign of approval, though! (I have also only listened up to s2 finale, so uh. idk after that).

11. The Bright Sessions: there are xactly two reasons why this podcast is rated so low on this list. One, there’s quite a bit of romance in this podcast. I’m not against 80% of it, but like... Romance Exists. Two, Safehouse! I do not want or need to hear a man beaten half to death, no matter how much I hate him!

12. TMA: but, you might ask, why is TMA so low? It’s got not a kiss in sight, an a canon ace! Yes, I say, that all is true. It’s why TMA is in its special little category: As An Aro I’m Fine But What The Fuck Bro. An ace main character cannot erase the experience of listening to jon’s hand be burned while I was on a public bus, my Actual Physical Repulsion to michael’s voice, and also all the gore. It’s Gross, Bro! Edit for post e200: yeah.... i must admit the kiss was gross and the sound design really only got more disturbing, so its staying at #12, but... keep in mind that this podcast is simply quite terrible on the ears.

13. Junoverse (Penumbra Podcast): Didn’t mean to make these three popular podcasts the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th worst ones, but what can i say! these fuckers have foley. Junoverse is one of two podcasts in the special category Make Room For Jesus, and juno gets here primarily because of the downright ridiculous amount of making out in it, plus a Giant Subplot being romantic, and also the multiple scenes of torture/a character getting Hurt, Badly. However, not the worst, since while kissing is gross, I can deal. Torture/death/screaming/gore, however...

14. The AM Archives (including Order&Chaos): behold, the pride of the Make Room For Jesus category. I love this podcast/s more than life itself, but I also used transcripts for most of it, so I was able to actually get through it. But from what i could get from transcripts/listening to the finale/asking fellow listeners, its... well, #14 for a reason. And what I can say: this podcast has everything! Burgeoning romance thats, ngl, kinda uncomfortable to listen to! A Kiss (thank you, Order&Chaos, for giving me lovely poly content, but... Kiss Gross)! Copious amounts of screaming and torture! Emotional distress of many varieties (mine included)! Extended Death Scene! I’m sorry, i feel like doing tama a disservice by ranking it last, but unfortunately... it ain’t easy on the ears, and I’m incredibly glad I avoided a lot of it! (...i still did listen to owen’s death, tho. which. aaagh i’ll never be over that one, huh). I love you, TAMA and O&C, but you are hard as hell to listen to.

ty for reading to the end! please, i take aro-friendly podcast suggestions! again, this is based on memory and memory alone (tama excluded), so uh... whoops! if i forgot something important

[thoriffix]

Can you rec some media with canon queer characters 😌

ofc!! thisll by no means be an exhaustive list but idk what youre looking for specifically so ill break it into categories

my current favs!! if u follow me u know these already lol

the umbrella academy: netflix show abt dysfunctional superpowered siblings reuniting to stop the apocalypse. canon mlm character (pansexual according to his actor) w mlm romance, canon wlw character (lesbian according to someone on the show dont rmr who) w het romance in s1, wlw romance in s2 - this is one of my absolute fav shows at the minute in general its brilliant

the magnus archives: horror podcast abt the head archivist of an institute researching experiences w the supernatural. protagonist is canonically biromantic asexual, in a mlm relationship in s5, and there is another canon bisexual character, as well as (iirc) a canon wlw couple - yall know ive been so into tma lately its so so good, obviously if you dont like horror its not for you but if you do.. 👀

sanders sides: youtube series abt a gay dude working out his emotional problems via personified aspects of his personality. all the characters are gay cuz thas what thomas is baby! - i was hesitant abt putting this cuz thomas is a person not a character lol but if u haven't seen sasi i recommend it its like free therapy but theres songs sometimes

shows!

julie and the phantoms (netflix remake): musical show abt a teen girl rediscovering music after her mothers death w the help of three ghosts who were in a 90s band. canon gay character w a slow burn romance (not yet canon bfs but s2 lets go) - its very cheesy and the musical segments can drag on a bit but its p good overall

lucifer: detective show abt lucifer abandoning his rule of hell to buy a nightclub and beginning to solve murders w the lapd. lucifer is canonically bi/pan, as is his demon pal mazikeen, but queerness rly isnt a focus of the show its more casual rep - that being said its a good show overall, if a little predictable now n then (s1-3 on amazon prime, 4+5 on netflix)

kipo and the age of wonderbeasts: fantasy cartoon set in a future filled w mutant intelligent animals, kipo finds herself lost and has to get home w the help of her friends. canon gay character as one of the mains, canon nb side character - its a rly good cartoon! lots of fun, excellent soundtrack, and the main characters are all poc which is rly nice to see

the dragon prince: cartoon abt two princes and an elf assassin returning a dragon egg to its mother. canon mlm couple, several canon wlw characters, canon nb character - i havent seen the show myself but ive heard very good things abt it!

i am not okay with this: netflix show abt a teen girl discovering she has superpowers and hating it. protag is canon wlw (i THINK shes a lesbian but i havent watched it in a hot sec), developing wlw relationship - ianowt slaps! sad that s2 got cancelled but s1 is real good its a touch spooky and theres a bit of gore/blood so watch out lol

schitt's creek: sitcom abt a rich family who lose all their money and have to move into the motel of a town they bought as a joke. canon pansexual character and canon gay character w one of the sweetest mlm relationships - a rly good witty show w excellent character development for every character!

good omens: show abt a demon and an angel trying to stop the end of the world. every celestial character in it is nonbinary, + crowley and aziraphale have a nonexplicit (ie no on screen pda lol) romance - good omens is such a good queer show none of the characters care abt gender in the slightest lmao, plus the show in general is fantastic (the book is also very good)

movies!

the old guard: a group of immortals fight an organisation that wants to capitalise off their immortality. canon mlm couple - another one i havent seen yet (i will!) but apparently very good

it chapter 2: horror sequel to It, w the main characters returning to derry to defeat pennywise for good. canon gay character in unrequited love - i only say chapter 2 because his queerness isnt referenced at all in the first film, again its big horror and theres no gay romance just gay tragedy but its a good film

love, simon: romcom about a closeted gay teen falling in love w someone over emails. do i even need to state the rep? - honestly if u haven't seen love simon yet what are you even DOING its so good proper fluffy queer romcom, the book (simon vs the homosapiens agenda) is also really good!! so is the sequel (leah on the offbeat) where the protag is a bi girl + it focuses on a wlw romance

the way he looks: brazilian coming of age film abt a blind teen boy falling for the new kid at his school. canon mlm relationship - this doesnt seem to be on (british) netflix anymore so idk where youd find it with subtitles but i rmr liking it a lot!

games!

night in the woods: 2d platformer abt a young woman (well. cat) dropping out of college and coming home to live w her parents + discovering spooky happenings in her hometown. canon mlm couple and i believe the protag is canonically bi? - i will recommend nitw to literally anyone who will listen its one of my all time favourite games, deals w a lot of mental health issues and its absolutely gorgeous w a brilliant soundtrack and rly good dialogue thats witty and serious and realistic (its on steam + switch for sure dk abt other platforms, abt 15 quid i think?)

tell me why: adventure game abt twins returning to their childhood home + findin Secrets. canon trans male character - i havent got around to buying + playing this yet but it looks really good! (its in three chapters + on steam, not sure on price)

other media!

the art of being normal: slice of life novel abt a young trans girl discovering herself. main characters are a trans man and a trans woman. - a good novel! trigger warning for transphobic actions including descriptions of a transphobic attack on the guy, and its certainly not without its faults otherwise, but i thought it was pretty good

the adventure zone: dungeons and dragons podcast by the mcelroy brothers. idk specifics but theres a lot of canon queer characters in it! - i havent listened to taz yet but i know a lot abt it, inc that its good and funny and has plenty of queer rep

theres several more i like that arent listed here but to keep this from getting just ridiculously long ill leave it there :] tried to get a range of genres and medias, hopefully theres something for you in there!

[alienwritings]

[id: a promo banner for a wip. theres text in the centre of the top of the image that says in all caps, “bad weather”. beneath it there are three images. the first is of the tops of three different coloured umbrellas in a busy street. visible over the umbrella tops is a bus. the second image is a piece of art of two hands clasped together, the hand on the right is painted in light blue and yellow and the one on the left is in dark pink, peach and dark blue. the third image is of an empty streetcar stop, it is one of the stops that is located in between two different directions of traffic. at the bottom of the banner in a smaller font is the tet, “a wip intro”. end id]

wip intro: bad weather

status: outlining/drafting genre: urban fantasy, romance, short fiction setting: toronto, on the edges of magic

premise:

toronto weather has always been contrary, but the brief spots of localized rain around the subway every tuesday at 2:25pm is starting to seem closer to supernatural than contrary. stevie, always prepared, brings an umbrella every day just in case. eline, endlessly hopeful and currently losing the battle of finding her umbrella in her messy hallway closet, figures that maybe this tuesday at 2:25pm will finally be the tuesday where she doesn't end up dripping wet on the train ride home.

cast:

stevie murillo: 23, radio station intern during the day, podcaster at night, prepared for (almost) everything, likes audio because as long as she knows what she's doing the mic will pick up her voice and someone around the world can hear her

eline kim: 24, finishing her masters and working part time in a little art gallery, makes her own earrings and hats (she wears a crocheted lime green bucket hat on the subway), in love with love, but more importantly in love with the idea of art as a love letter, HOH, has always wanted a cat 

and (bonus) 

Nina: 18, senioritis + romantic at heart + a bad tendency to listen to conversations on the subway + a case of overflowing magic and a brand new license to practice = some very wet tuesdays 

Adair: 23, Nina’s longsuffering older sister, has much better things to be doing than trying to battle her weather witch sister’s attempt at matchmaking

if you are interested and want to hear more you can ask to join my tag list and/or join my wip server

[bestbluebouquet]

Flirting with Social Anxiety

Roman and Virgil run a podcast together, helping lonely souls with romantic advice. But maybe the best romance was the one they found along the way...

Podcast AU

Characters: Roman, Virgil.

Pairing(s)- Prinxiety

No Warnings (but let me know if I missed one)

---

It’s two pm on a Thursday afternoon. Roman Prince stands in front of Virgil Storm’s garage and punches in a number that is more muscle memory than actual memory at this point. As soon as the garage door opens enough for him to duck under, he does so, squeezing between a large trash can and a beat up silver car to get to the door into the house. He closed the garage door on his way in. Roman cupped his hands around his mouth and hollered into the house.

“VIR~GIL.” 

A pause 

“DOWN HERE!” came the shouted reply from the basement. Roman jogged down the stairs and into the recording studio. 

“Everything set up?” he asked as he dropped into the cushy chair waiting for him. Across the table and two mics away, sat Virgil, who checked something on his computer and nodded slowly.

“Yup. Got everything you need?”

Roman pulled out his computer and wiggled it in the air for Virgil to notice, before setting it down on the table. 

“Here.” Virgil kicked the power-strip under the table over to Romans side. Roman gratefully plugged his computer in and pulled up the page he needed. He put on his headphones and Virgil did so as well.

“Alright, ready when you are..”.

“Five, four, three, two, one.” Virgil pointed at Roman to start talking.

“Hello and welcome back to another episode of Flirting with Social Anxiety. I’m the Flirting,”

“And I’m the Anxiety. If you’re new to the show and haven’t listened before, we take your romantic problems and give you solutions.”

“Although for legal reasons, we are not experts and this is a comedy podcast.”

“Please don’t sue us.”

The pair fell into a comfortable rhythm. One of them would pull up a submitted scenario that they chose for that week. They'd debate, share a laugh and move on. Four scenarios flew by in what felt like 20 minutes, although a glance at the clock on his computer told him it was closer to an hour and a half. Roman twirled his finger in the air questioningly, asking Virgil if he was ready to wrap it up. 

Virgil held up one finger and mouthed “one more”. Roman leaned back in his chair and Virgil cleared his throat before starting to read. 

“Dear Flirting with Social Anxiety. I think I’m in love with my best friend. I’ve known him since college and we recently started working the same job. We’re both gay men, so at least I know he swings my way. But what do I do? This guy is really important to me and I don’t want to mess things up. 

Virgil took a sip of water, watching as Roman took a second to consider it. 

“I would say to go for it-”

Virgil choked on his water. Roman paused as Virgil coughed into his sleeve. 

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah”

“Alright. But yeah, I think this person - did they give a name?”

“Uhhh, no.”

“This person should go for it! What’s there to lose? If he’s really your best friend then he shouldn't abandon you over that. If he likes you back, then perfect! If he doesn’t, your friend should be able to put on big boy pants and deal with it.”

Virgil stayed silent. Roman looked at him expectantly. 

“Well Mister Doom and Gloom? Your turn.” Roman flashed a crooked smile “That’s kinda how this podcast works”

“I don't think he should go for it.”  Virgil said softly, then cleared his throat. “I mean, it sounds too risky. It sounds like they could lose their best friend. It’s not worth it.”

“Oh come on Negative Nelson, love is always worth it!”

“Well what if it’s not that simple?”

Virgil was now staring intently at him from across the table, more heated than he usually got during the recording. Roman looked him in the eye. 

“Are you sure we’re talking about the same thing?”

He asked as softly as he could. Virgil looked away and took a sip of water. After a second he nodded.  

“Yeah. Of course. this guys deal.”

A silence fell.

“Anyway.” Virgil started the outro “I think that's today's episode.”

“I think I agree.”

“Tune in next week to listen to even more flirting.”

“And even more anxiety. See you next week listeners.”

Roman waited until Virgil had taken off his headphones before he took his off. When Virgil took off his headphones, it meant everything was taken care of on his end of things. Usually the symbolic removal was followed by a loud sigh and a soft smile, but this time Virgil's face was tight. 

“Virgil..”

Virgil shot up from his seat nervously. 

“I need to go to the bathroom.”

He blurted out and all but ran upstairs. Roman made to get out of his chair, but stopped. He thought about the scenario Virgil gave him. Two gay men, met in college, work the same job.... Oh. Oh.

Roman almost slapped himself in the face for just now realizing it. Of course Virgil would try to get his opinion on the situation in an undercover way before making a move. 

Roman made up his mind and slowly walked upstairs. Virgil wasn't in the first floor bathroom, so he continued up to the second floor. There he found the bathroom tucked away in Virgil's bedroom with a closed door and a sliver of light emanating from within. He knocked his knuckles on the door quietly. 

“Hey Virgil.” he said to the door, then settled on the floor. “You don't have to say anything right now, but if you could listen for a bit, I think I have something that you might want to hear. If you want to hear it that is. ” 

There was a slight shuffling on the other side of the door and the door creaked behind Roman, which made him think Virgil had sat on the other side of the door

“Go ahead.” Virgil whispered.

“Okay. I've been thinking of that scenario you told me, and it reminded me of one I read. It was about a man who recently began working with his best friend in the world. A best friend that he met in a coffee shop in college, where the friend was working on an essay at 11:00 pm and fell asleep, only for the dashing writer (and part time barista) to give him a blanket.”

A huffed laugh from the other side of the door.

“The writer spoke about his best friend and how he was the most important person in the world to him. The person he could rely on the most, the person he turned to when he needed advice. His rock.” 

Roman trailed off and cleared his throat

“And he spoke about how sometimes he wished that they were more than best friends.” He said softly, leaning his head back on the door.“And I’m not talking about super-best friends.” He added, just to get Virgil to laugh. 

And he did. 

“I think I know what you're talking about.” Virgil said. 

“Yeah. How whenever his friend laughed or smiled in just the right way, his heart skipped a beat.”

“How when the sun lit up his hair it shined like gold.”

“Or when he looked him in the eye, his brain shorted out.”

“Or how he put his heart into everything he did.” 

“And how he knew he loved him.” Roman whispered

“And how he loved him back.” Virgil whispered back.

The doorknob rattled and Roman turned around. The door opened and Virgil was sitting there on the other side. Virgil opened his arms for a hug and Roman wrapped his arms around him as tight as he could. 

“I love you, Roman.”

“I love you too, Virgil.”

They sat there for a while, not wanting to let go of each other, never wanting to let go of each other again. Eventually, Virgil’s stomach growled slightly and Roman chuckled.

“Want to order a pizza?”

“Only if it's veggie.”

“Of course, I wouldn't dream of anything else.”

And if the two spent the rest of the night cuddled on the couch eating veggie pizza and watching old Disney movies until they fell asleep? Well, that was nobody’s business but their own.

--

Taglist:

@coconut-cluster, @dew-drop-of-honey, @astrozei, (and I believe @caramel-clouds25, @bihufflepuffsstuff, @prinxiety-shipper101 and @nowhere-man-goes-somewhere expressed interest? but theres no pressure to stay on this taglist :D)

(if you would like to be removed from or added to this taglist, let me know in the notes or send me an ask!)

A/N: Here it is!! This took longer than I thought but I wanted to get it out today. I hope y’all enjoy it. Reblog/Like/Comment! Feel free to ask me q’s about this AU, I’d love to answer them! Let me know about any spelling/grammar errors I may have made