#but my brain wanted to write it so i did

[waterfallofspace]

Letting It In & Letting It Go (2/3)

The one in which K/azuki learns to let his feelings in, and R/ei learns to let his walls go down, at least a little. Feat. Sick R/ei, caretaker K/azuki, and heavy ship implications (cough outright statements cough), though, they aren’t in a relationship at this point.

Same description as the last one, welcome to Part Two!  (Link to part one is ~~here~~)

R/ei is still sick, but hopefully he’s feeling a bit better since the last time. I guess we’ll see, won’t we?!  (Again, welcome to ‘I have B/uddy D/addies brain rot so, to anyone who bothers to read this, thank you for your time, I hope it’s enjoyable!) (references to violence, swearing, smoking, trauma, bad coughing/wheezing, incase you don’t like any of that) ((ALSO: There are spoilers for B/uddy D/addies. Slight, but it’s still spoilers, so be warned!))  Characters: R/ei, K/azuki, Angst&Banter feat. Caretaking  Word Count: 5.9k (oh lord)

Kazuki’s eyes flutter open, and as he gets his bearings, he realizes he fell asleep at the table. Rei is still letting out congested snores from the couch, but the slight wheeze in his lungs is gone. ‘That’s a relief, at least for now’ he thinks, a yawn escaping. Stumbling to the door, Kazuki opens it to find, true to his word, Kyu had left a basket of supplies outside. The note pinned to it lists what’s in it, and what medications not to combine. ‘Thanks Kyu’. He makes another mental note to text him later with an actual thanks. He lays all the stuff out on the table, taking stock of what was brought. There are some tea bags, a few boxes of tissues, and a pharmacy worth of medications. Cough drops, cough syrups, nasal decongestants (in the form of sprays), pain relievers, and antihistamines, along with a few boxes of general cold meds. Each is unopened, and clearly listed on the note by name, type, and what not to take with it. Turning his attention back to Rei, Kazuki tries to figure out, without waking the man, what medications he should get ready. He can hear the congestion in his snores, so getting him to take the nasal spray when he wakes up would probably help. Kazuki sighs to himself, realizing that task may not be as simple as it sounds. Rei isn’t exactly someone who enjoys discomfort, so convincing him to use a spray that will help, but will feel awful at first… ‘yeah, not gonna be easy’.  Getting back to symptom management, he thinks back to yesterday. The fever was alarming, but it’s since broken, and Rei doesn’t look particularly warm anymore. He was also coughing and sneezing a lot, which he isn’t now, ‘but that’s most likely due to him, ya know, being unconscious’. After studying the list a bit more, and comparing medications and uses, Kazuki decides on a few main choices. Setting aside a nasal spray, general cold medication, an herbal brand of cough medicine, and a handful of cough drops, he packs the rest back into the basket. The tissues are set next to the medication, along with the tea, of which he picks out a nice vanilla chamomile, and gets up to start the kettle.  ~~~~~~~ Stirring on the couch knocks Kazuki out of his sleepy daze, and he looks up to see Rei raising a hand to swipe at his nose. He attempts to sit up, which apparently requires significant effort given the pace he’s going at. “Rise and shine Rei, you want some breakfast?” The low groan he gets in return is indistinguishable as an answer, and since he didn’t eat for most of yesterday, Kazuki decides Rei no longer gets a say in the matter. He starts cracking a few eggs, turning on the stovetop and fishing a frying pan out of the drawer.  “Hh’nggxt-! ehhH’NNgxt-! nnDGXXT-!uhhh”  “Bless you!” “hH’KNNGT-!hhuhh”  “And again. You want bacon with your eggs?” “Who said I want eggs?” Kazuki let out a soft sigh, flashing Rei his most charming smile with just a touch of pleading in his eyes. “You didn’t eat anything yesterday, or dinner the night before, so today you’re eating eggs. But the bacon is optional, because I’m not gonna waste perfectly good meat on you if you’re just gonna pick at it and leave it behind. It’s bacon after all.”  Rei gives a grunt in response, so Kazuki throws an extra piece of bacon on, just incase. He could always eat it himself if Rei’s uninterested. Taking note of the harsh quality of Rei’s voice, he also starts a pot of rice, something easier on the throat and stomach. While the food cooks, Kazuki takes a minute to take in Rei’s appearance. He’s normally dishevelled, but the redness around his nose and pale quality of his skin is making him look particularly rough. He looks almost bruised, the dark bags under his eyes deepening against the tired depth of them. At just the sight of him you’d think he hadn’t slept in months, but with this sickness he’d slept more in the past day than he had in weeks.  The way his teeth dig into his lip and the lines forming around his eyes read plainly of pain. His hands grip the controller a bit too tightly, the whites of his knuckles showing. His whole body is tense, like normal, but the slight trembling of his muscles suggest this stance is taking considerable effort. Kazuki picks up on these tells almost instantly, shuddering a little as he realizes just how deeply Rei must be hurting for him to be able to notice them so easily. “Hey-” Kazuki starts, not missing the way Rei flinches at the volume of his voice. He softens a little before continuing.  “-I have some medicine for you to take. Kyu dropped it off outside earlier, must have been when we were- uh, nevermind! The point is, I need you to take it, so do I need to make some airplane noises, or are you adult enough to do it yourself?”  Rei gives him a measured look, before shrugging, his eyes flashing back to the TV. ‘Not an outright no, so that’s progress!’ Kazuki thinks to himself, turning off the stove and plating the food he’s made. He piles himself a nice tall plate of eggs and bacon, with a small bowl of rice. However, he serves Rei just a single fried egg and a small pile of rice, setting the single strip of bacon next to it. Nothing too overwhelming, just something to give his system a bit of energy. “Come and get it while it’s fresh and hot!” Rei trudges over, and Kazuki doesn’t miss the wince he tries to hide when he first stands, or the way his hand flies almost on its own to his head, giving his temples a quick rub. ‘Headache then, and likely a bad one.’ Kazuki makes a mental note to add ‘pain relievers’ to the list of meds he has set out for Rei.  ~~~~~~~ They ate in relative silence, Rei picking at his food, but managing to get bits of it into his mouth. Sniffling and light coughs broke up the still air, but Kazuki just ignored them. It almost felt like feeding a stray cat. Every movement Rei made was calculated, and in return Kazuki was slow, careful not to scare him into retreating back to the couch.  “hH’KNGT-! hIH’DNNT-!uhhh”  “Bless you! ….Those sound like they hurt.” “It’s fihhhne. Hihh… hAH’GNXXT-!uhhh”  “And again.”  Kazuki can’t help but grimace at the weak groan that escapes Rei’s throat before he can suppress it. ‘Why stifle when it’s hurting your head so much, and not even stopping the tickle?’ He muses, watching as Rei ducks into his chest with another contained sneeze, this one barely even audible. The watery quality of Rei’s eyes as he slowly brings his head back up doesn’t go unnoticed, but Kazuki decides to put it on the backburner. Right now he needs to focus on getting Rei to take the medication. He reaches back into the basket, pulling out a bottle of painkillers, and adding a couple to the cup of meds he had already set out. Setting the nasal spray beside it, and pouring a spoonful of cough syrup, he meets Rei’s eyes. “Swallow these with water, then take this.” Seeing the hesitation on Rei’s face as he regards the nasal spray, Kazuki gives him a light chuckle. “You can save that one for later. You should do it eventually, but these pills will take the edge off the congestion anyways. Now hurry up before this falls off the spoon. Kyu paid for this, so I’ll make you lick it off the table if it spills.” Rei gave him a low growl, but swallowed the meds dry, ‘show off’, before taking the spoon, making a face as he put it in his mouth, but finishing it anyways. Satisfied with these results, Kazuki gestures for him to return to the couch, and Rei obliges eagerly.  Kazuki then went about clearing the table, and making a mental note to make rice again for lunch (as it was the only part of the meal Rei had actually finished). He then happened to glance back over at Rei just in time to see him crush his nose into his wrist with a harsh “hH’KNNGT-!” that left them both wincing. “Bless you. But christ Rei, just cut that out already, you’re gonna kill your head even more. It’s actually hurting me to hear you do this. I thought we went over this yesterday!” Rei shoots him a glance at that last section, as if desperately searching for any indication of the day prior that fever seems to have wiped clean. “I don’t remember much of yesterday. Just something about the tub…”  “Yeah well, not surprising. You were pretty out of it. Anyways, doesn’t matter, the point is, suppressing them like that is fine for jobs or whatever, but right now you’re just hurting yourself. Plus it’s… it’s gotta be annoying right..? It doesn’t exactly scratch the itch.” “It’s a habit.” Kazuki rolls his eyes, knowing just as well as Rei does that with this much sneezing, it’s a choice, not an instinct. And even though he does believe Rei that it’s a habit, he also knows that the sneezes aren’t gonna stop anytime soon. Keeping this up is just gonna make his headache even worse. Rei brings a hand up to crush his nose shut for another deeply unsatisfying “hH’NGXT-! heh’DXXGT-!” and when Kazuki sees the tear roll from his eyes at the pain of it, he can’t stand it anymore. He walks out of the kitchen, passing the living room and heading up to his bedroom to fetch something. The feather duster sits right where he left it in his closet.  ‘Sorry Rei, but I promise this is for the best’ he says to himself as he approaches the couch once back downstairs. Rei is giving him a measured look, obviously noticing the way he’s holding his hands behind his back. “I’m sorry it had to come to this, but I cannot listen to you doing that anymore. You’re gonna break something, either in you, or me.” “What are you ta-” He cuts Rei off with the duster right to his face. “Kahhh! Kazuki what the fuhhhhh- hUH-! What are you doing?”  “You seem set on suppressing them out of existence, and I’m putting a stop to it.” Rei tries to bring his hands up to push the duster away, but doing so just sends more dust and feather bits right at his face. Kazuki continues brushing his face with it, only stopping when Rei’s hitching turns into a desperate shaky inhale. “hhHEHH-! hH’ZZSCHH’OO-! HH’RUSHH’OO-! ESHH’OO-! hehH- RSHH’OO-TSHH’OO-! Hihhh… heH’TSHH’OO-!  Hehh! MMPFSHH’OO-! Hehh… hahh…. Hhh-!” “It’s okay Rei, let it all go. I don’t mind. You’re safe here.”  “Ahh… hehh…. hehH’MPFSHH-! Hehh! MPFSHH-!uhhh TSHHH-TSHH’OO-! hEHH! Kaaahhhhzz- haAH’ZZSCHH’OO! I can’t s- stooohh… stop-” Without thinking, Kazuki reaches over, prying away Rei’s hands that he’s stapled to his face, and pinches his nose shut. Rei lets out a soft moan as the sneezing finally dies down enough to let him catch his breath. They sit like that for a minute, until Kazuki realizes he’s still holding Rei’s nose, blushes, and lets go. “Bless you! See, isn’t that better?” Now it’s Rei’s turn to blush, taking the last of the tissues from the box next to him, and letting himself fully blow his nose before responding. “....yeah, it does feel better.” “I knew it! You should really listen to me more often, I’m quite brilliant. You people, you and Kyu, never appreciating my intelligence. You think you’re all that because you’re a tough assassin, practically perfect at it, raised by famous killers, but I’m just as smart you know! If not more so! I had to do it without all the training!” “It was effective training, but it wasn’t all good.” Kazuki pauses his victory dance, finally realizing what he had said.  “Sorry… I didn’t mean-” Rei cuts him off with a shrug, wiping his nose once more with the tissues before tossing them and picking his controller back up. Eyes still on the screen, he spoke again. “I wasn’t allowed weakness. I learned how to hide any sign of humanity, any ‘flaws’.” His tone is balanced, almost like he was reading a grocery list. Just stating facts. But there’s a pain swimming through his eyes that makes Kazuki’s mouth run dry. It’s almost like he can feel all the emotions trembling below the surface of Rei’s calmly annoyed mask, pounding on him from the inside, waiting for a crack so they can seep out. Kazuki wants to give them a way out. Give Rei a space to break down some of the walls his ‘Boss’ had built up in him. Maybe let him figure out how to show his humanity again, something that was so cruelly stolen from him. That’s what he wants, but he knows that’s not what either of them needs.  ‘What Rei needs is a space where he can keep the mask on without effort. That’s what he needs. That’s what both of us need. In this job, we can’t form attachments. We can’t let our masks slip, not even for a second. We need to be cold, collected, and calculating.’ And then, even though he tries not to, he lets his mind wander back to that same old place it always seems to end up. An umbrella floating through the street, the smell of smoke, the ringing in his ears… ‘We don’t get to have people get close to us. That just puts them in danger, and us in danger of losing them.’ “hEH’KSSHH’OO!”  A sneeze breaks him out of his spiralling thoughts, and as Kazuki’s eyes refocus, he realizes Rei is staring at him. “Heh, sorry, got a bit lost in thought there. Bless you.” “It’s fine. Thought you were gonna fall asleep standing up. Didn’t want to worry about you splitting your head open.” Kazuki laughs, and Rei lets a smile slip across his features for just a second, before the grimace of annoyance resets itself, and he turns his eyes back to his game. Kazuki feels a yawn slip out, and Rei directs a raised eyebrow at him. “Didn’t get a lot of sleep last night, I think I’m gonna take a quick catnap.” “Okay.” The answer is short, but he can see the slight flush on Rei’s cheeks as he thinks back to the reason Kazuki is so tired. “Nighty-night.” He shoots over his shoulder, heading upstairs to his room.  ~~~~~~~ The alarm goes off at twelve, just like he wanted it to, but Kazuki still fights the urge to throw the phone at the wall. Letting his head flop back against the pillow, he considers staying in bed all day, but these thoughts are quickly silenced when he hears a bout of harsh coughing from downstairs. Sighing a little, and letting a stray “hH’ISH’shiiew!” slip out as he pulls his jacket back on, Kazuki heads for the stairs, nearly falling down them at the sight waiting for him. Rei stands beside the door, putting on his shoes, holding a loose fist to his mouth as the coughs shake his whole frame.  “What in the ever-loving-fuck do you think you are doing?”  Rei jumps slightly, which is alarming in of itself since Kazuki wasn’t exactly being quiet as he came down the stairs. “Going out.” “Oh like hell you are! And just where are you planning to drag your sickly form to? Gotta go infect a supermarket? Why is it that the one time I actually want you to stay home all day, lazing around, you decide, ‘oh no, no, today is the first time in my life that I feel the unfightable urge to go outside!’ For the love of god Rei, the one time!” “I’m going to see Kyu. We dropped out of the job at the last minute because of me. He’s probably angry, and wehhh! hH’ZZCHH’OO-! we need to take a new one to make up for it.”  Kazuki blinks, staring at Rei, who for his part, is still putting his shoes on. “Bless you. I already took care of that.” “What?” “I told him that you were sick, and he brought the basket over. He said just not to let it happen again, he isn’t upset at us for bailing. Sickness isn’t exactly something you can help…”  Rei’s face was his normal calm annoyance, but something unreadable flashed in his eyes.  “Oh.” And then it hits Kazuki. This probably was new to him, the idea that being sick wasn’t a punishable offence. “Besides, with the state you’re in right now, I don’t want you in position and then blow it because you-” “heH’NNggxt-! hh’nnGT-! AH’KTNGTT-!uhhh” “-Took the words right out of my mouth. Bless you.” “I didn’t say anything.” “Shut up! You know what I mean- oh forget it. You just go lay down again, it’ll be time for more meds again soon. But for now, you should take some cough drops, that cough sounds pretty painful.”  “It’s nothing. My head is worse.” Kazuki feels his mouth drop open at the admission as Rei slowly bends down to take his shoes off again, leaving them in a pile on the floor ‘oh come on, really?’ before making his way back to the couch. Reaching over to pick up the shoes, Kazuki hears Rei sneeze again from behind him. “hH’NGT’ooo-! hEHK’TSHH’OO-!”  “Bless you!” He calls as he puts the shoes back next to the door, heading over to the basket of meds to get Rei’s next dose ready afterwards. “Snfff`- hehh.. hhH-! guhhh…”  Kazuki risks a glance over at Rei, noticing the way his hand is hovering slightly in front of his face, as if he’s waiting for one more. Reaching over into the basket, he grabs a box of tissues and tosses them onto the couch. “Blow your nose, it’ll help.” Rei obliges with an eye roll and sigh, rubbing his nose into the tissues for a moment before letting a harsh blow scrape out. Kazuki winces, making a mental note to buy more tissues next time he’s out. If- ‘okay fine, “when”’ he catches this, he’s gonna need them. “hH’ZSSCHH’OO-!” “Bless y-” “hAH’TSHH’OO-! RRSHH’OO-! heH’NNGXT-! Hehh… hH’MMTSHHH’OO-!uhhh… hhh… heHH-! Guhhh… hhH-! hhHDT-uhhhh…” “Christ, bless you again, and again. Are you al-” “HH’TSHH’OOO-! mmMPFFSHH’OO-! hEhH-uhhh…. Hhehh- hHH’ZZSCHH’OOO-!”  “Bless you! What the fuck Rei, why are you getting so much worse so fast?” Rei just gasps in response, ducking back into the tissues with a harsh triple that doesn’t even give him a breath in between. “hUH’ZSSHH-RSHHH-TSHH’OO-!” Kazuki doesn’t even give a blessing this time, his focus completely taken over by figuring out what’s going on. Even for Rei, this isn’t normal. Sneezing with a cold is one thing, sneezing with this level of viciousness for no reason is something completely different.  Racking his brain he tries to remember the last time, if ever, that he’s seen Rei this bad. Earlier he got a longer fit out of him with the duster, but even that wasn’t nearly as throat-scraping as this, and at least gave him time to collect his breath in between. “Kaahhhhzuki-! hUH’SCHHH’OO! RSHH-TSHHH-TSHHH-KSHHH’OO-! hEHH! hEH’ZZSCHH’OOO-!” Rei’s still desperately sneezing into the tissues, but the box fell off the couch during the commotion. Kazuki reaches to pick it up, and freezes at the sight staring back at him. ‘Lotion infused? Wait a second… Is Rei… Oh fuck-’  Kazuki throws the box on the floor, rushing to the bathroom and coming back with a toilet roll. Rei shoots him a frantic glance as he tears the tissues out of his hand, replacing them with a section of roll, which Rei quickly uses to blow his nose. Taking a desperate breath, letting another “hH’TSHH’OO-!” escape, and blowing his nose again, Rei finally manages to stop the fit. “You’re allergic to lotion!?” “What?” “The tissues dumbass, they’re lotion infused! Are you allergic to lotion?” “I guess so. I’m allergic to most perfumes, so I guess that would make sense.” “You’re what? You didn’t think to tell me this? That maybe I should know so, oh I don’t know, off the top of my head, so I don’t give you lotion infused tissues that nearly kill you? Maybe so that doesn’t happen!?” Rei just shrugs, burying his nose in the toilet roll again and letting another leftover sneeze scrape out of his throat. “HH’ZZSHH’OO-!uhhh” At the tired groan that follows, Kazuki manages to get a hold of himself. Taking a few deep breaths, he shoots Rei a dirty glare, before rubbing a hand down his face. “For future reference, telling me about things you’re allergic to is no longer optional.” “Okay.” Rei pauses for a minute, a harsh cough cutting him off before he can continue, and Kazuki hands him a water bottle from the coffee table. After taking a sip, and clearing his throat, Rei continues, voice noticeably softer, though not necessarily by choice. “Sorry. I didn’t think it was relevant.” The apology seems sincere, regret plainly painted across his face, so Kazuki offers him a gentle smile and playful punch to the arm. “I mean hey, it’s your nose that suffers after all.” Rei moans slightly at the reminder, lightly rubbing his nose against his palm, grumbling out, “It still itches.” Kazuki grabs the meds he was getting before, adding an antihistamine to the mix this time. “Yep. You’ll most likely be itchy for a while, but here, take these. I added an antihistamine, that should help kill the reaction a bit faster. The rest is for the cold.” A low groan is all he gets as an answer, but Rei swallows them, so he counts that as a win. “Maybe we’ll save the nasal spray for another time, I think right now it’ll just make you feel worse. They normally cause a few sneezes.” Rei’s eyes go wide as he nods, then immediately flinches at his head changing positions. “Still got a headache, hm?” This time Rei plays it safe with a verbal response. “Yeah. hAH’SHH’ooo-!”  “Bless you. At least they’re getting softer.” “Mm.”  Kazuki pauses, his mind drifting back to a time in his life that he simultaneously refuses to let himself think about, and can’t seem to ever stop. Back to holding her head in his lap, gently rubbing her neck and temples, back when she’d get migraines during pregnancy. “Do you get migraines?” “Yeah.” “I uh…” Kazuki raises a hand sheepishly to the back of his neck, turning his head slightly away from Rei’s eyes. “I might know something that could help.” He doesn’t get a response, but Rei is watching him intently, eyes studying his face. ‘Shit, he looks really cute like that- woah woah, no, what kinda thought is that?’ Quickly deciding that answering himself would be the easiest way to get Rei to stop giving him that look that seemed to set him on fire from the inside out, Kazuki heads to the kitchen. He fetches a washcloth from a drawer, running it under freezing water, ringing it out a bit, then letting himself drift down onto the couch. “It’s uh… It might be a bit awkward, but you lay your head in… uh…. In my lap, and then I just kinda-” Before he can finish, Rei has paused the game, and laid onto his back, his head resting on Kazuki’s legs. Both of them are stiff, the tension rising off of them enough to raise the heat in the room by several degrees. Without a word, Kazuki places the washcloth on the back of Rei’s neck, and lets his hands touch his hair, starting to run down towards Rei’s temples, pausing only when he flinches at the contact. “Alright?” “Yeah.” With that, he continued his gentle rub, a smile fighting through his control when Rei’s eyes snapped shut and a low moan escaped his lips. ‘His lips… they look so soft… I wonder what they taste like’ Before he knows it, Kazuki feels his own face start moving forward, longing to touch Rei’s lips with his own.  ‘Woah, okay, I’m definitely getting this illness, because I must have a fever. That’s the only explanation for why I just thought that!’ Kazuki rushes, heat starting to stain his face with a light pink tint, but thankfully for him, Rei remains none the wiser, his eyes still closed as he gently hums against the welcome touch. Slowly, he starts to drift off, until soon congested snoring fills the room once more. Kazuki lets his eyes linger on Rei’s lips just a moment longer than he should, before leaning back, and letting his own eyes flutter shut, their breathing quickly falling in sync.  ~~~~~~~ A harsh sound snaps Kazuki out of his sleep. Looking down at his lap he realizes Rei’s head isn’t there anymore, and when he turns his head he sees the man curled up on the edge of the couch, a harsh cough sputtering out of him. “Rei, are you okay?” A wheeze is all he gets in response, followed by deeper coughs that have him nearly falling off the couch. When his eyes find Rei’s, he feels the colour rush out of his face in response to the deep pale tint that Rei currently has. “Hey, okay, take it easy, shit- can you breathe?” Rei opens his mouth to reply, but the only sound that escapes is a faint whisper that seems to catch in his throat. His eyes are wide, panic practically seeping out of them, before he ducks back into his shoulder with another wet, rattling cough. The whistling sound when he tries to breathe answers the question for Kazuki. No, no he can’t. ‘Okay, fuck, don’t panic, think this through, what helps with coughing?’  Raising to his feet, Kazuki drapes Rei across his back, wincing at the way Rei tries with all the strength he has left to direct the onslaught of coughs away from him. Thanking god that the walk to the bathtub is short, Kazuki kicks the door closed behind them, setting Rei carefully on the ground. He then turns to the tub, turning the water as hot as it will go.  Rei gasps desperately, a harsh wheeze leaving tears in his eyes as he doubles over into himself with another round of harsh coughing. Kazuki can’t tell if the tears are from the rattling of the cough, or fear, and honestly he can’t decide which is worse. Finally, after a mere matter of minutes, but what felt like hours, the steam starts filling the bathroom. Rei is still coughing, but the whistling sound when he breathes is already starting to back down. ‘Or maybe that’s just wishful thinking’.  Kazuki lets the bathtub start to fill, walking over to where Rei is, and easing himself onto the ground next to him. He reaches out to rub Rei’s back, but pulls back when Rei flinches away, desperation overflowing in his eyes. They sit like that for a minute, both frozen, aside from the chesty cough still shaking Rei’s frail form, before slowly, Rei leans back into the touch, his watery eyes meeting Kazuki’s. Neither of them say anything, neither of them could if they wanted to. But they don’t need to. Kazuki looks into Rei’s eyes and knows what he means. ‘Your touch is allowed, just be gentle. I’m still learning how to feel safe with it.’ And in turn, Rei knows what the look he’s receiving means. ‘I know, I’ll be careful. Just let me help you.’  As the steam fills the room, Rei’s wheeze slowly starts to fade out, the cough loses some of its ferocity. Even so, Kazuki continues rubbing slow circles, and Rei doesn’t move away from the touch. Once the cough backs off enough for him to take a breath without any whistling, Kazuki stands, not missing the way Rei’s body trembles slightly when he removes his hand. “Come on, let's get you back to the couch, I’ll get you another dose of the cough syrup, and you should try to get some more rest. I have some work to do for a job Kyu asked me to finish up anyways, I’ll work on that while you sleep.” “Okay.” Rei’s voice is raw and harsh, and makes both of them grimace, so Kazuki reaches down and helps Rei stand, letting out a low hum as the other man winces at the movement. “Easy now, don’t go pulling anything. Carrying you is still a no from me, I’d like to keep my back intact.” There’s a faint hint of something that could be considered laughter from Rei, and given the state he’s in, and how expressive he normally is (ie. isn’t) it’s frankly impressive. Once they get back to the couch, Kazuki lets Rei lay down at his own pace, before getting him the cough syrup. Rei once again makes a face that reminds Kazuki of a child, but it’s better than not taking it. He stands and watches for a minute, making sure Rei’s able to drift off, before heading up to the office to finish the work he promised Kyu. Somewhere in his mind, a voice he shut in a box a long time ago starts screaming again, and he has to fight to ignore it. ‘This is love, you are in love!’  ~~~~~~~ “hH’SHH’UHH-!” A hoarse sneeze alerts Kazuki that his patient is awake again, pulling him out of the spiral his mind had chosen to wander down. Making his way downstairs, he’s relieved to see Rei sitting up, a lot more colour in his face. “How are you doing now? You gave me a bit of a scare. Ya know, for a smoker who seems to have remarkable tolerance to cigarettes, you sure have weak lungs!” Rei opens his mouth to answer, but all that comes out is a hoarse rush of air, followed by a deep, voiceless groan. A laugh escapes Kazuki’s lips before he can stop it, earning him a dark glare from the man sitting on the couch rubbing his throat. ‘This funny to you?’  Yet again, no words are needed for Kazuki to know exactly what Rei means. “Yes, in fact, it is pretty funny to me. You know that old saying, ‘your face will freeze that way’? Maybe this is the voice equivalent. You don’t use it enough, so it’s decided to just up and pack its bags!” Rei shoots him another glare, but this time there’s a hint of humour in it that he isn’t able to suppress. Kazuki winks at him, before checking the alarms he’d set on his phone for meds. “It’s gonna be another few hours before I can give you another dose of anything, so I think you’ll just have to put up with this for now.” “Well… at least… you’ll get… what you always… wanted… to talk without… interruption…”  The words are strained, and seem to scrape against his throat enough to make Kazuki audibly gasp. “Hey, woah, no no no. No more talking, not only is that extremely bad for you, but christ man, it sounds horrible. Don’t do that to yourself, you’re just gonna wreck something beyond repair.”  “Aren’t… you usually… on me… about not… talking enough…”  “Yeah but this is different! Seriously, it sounds painful. You should rest it, and drink some more water, try to give your throat a bit of a break.” Rei just nods this time, hand still lightly rubbing his throat, apparently done trying to fight his body on this particular matter. ‘Probably good, seeing as this is one fight he has no chance of winning. Only person skilled enough to take down Rei, is Rei’.  Kazuki sits down on the couch beside Rei, who had picked up the controller again, deciding to watch him play games for a while. Kazuki starts to feel a tickle form in his throat, and decides that denial is the best form of medication. ‘It’s probably just from hearing how bad Rei’s throat is, that’s all.’ He thinks, allowing himself to drift into the world of denial a little deeper. His thoughts are interrupted by… actually, he doesn’t know what by. There’s no actual noise, nothing has happened that should have brought him crashing back into the real world. Fully putting his gaze on Rei, Kazuki suddenly realizes what pulled him back in. “Bless you.” “heH’SHH’uhhh-!” Rei’s eyes meet his with a confused look. Kazuki just chuckles, letting himself indulge in a moment of pride for being able to read him that well. It started with a slight tremble around Rei’s eyes, followed by his nose twitching, and finally a slight gasp in his normal breathing. Patterns that Kazuki didn’t even realize he had memorized, and yet, it came so naturally to him.  While his gaze was already on Rei, he let himself look the man over. His shoulders were tight, like normal, but there was a slight shudder to them that made him reach over and drape a blanket over Rei’s legs. This time he got a low hum in response, reaffirming that he was correct on that assessment. Then there was his throat, which, while he wasn’t talking, was still slightly moving, almost as if he was swallowing constantly. Kazuki reaches over to his side of the couch where he had seen Rei place the water bottle earlier, and hands it to him, blushing a little at the look of pure confusion that met him once again. “You look like you need it… Am I wrong?” There’s no response, he didn’t expect one, but the way Rei’s hands loosen their grip on the controller after he drinks is all the answer Kazuki needs.  “Bless you.” “hH’SHH’uhhh-!”  “And again, and once more.” “hEH’SHH’uhhh-! Hehh-! hH’SHH’uhhh-!”  Rei gives him a withering look, but Kazuki just laughs it off, gently ruffling Rei’s hair, before pulling his hand back with a clearing of his throat. ‘Why did you do that?!” “So- uh- I have a bit more work to do upstairs. I’ll come back down when it-” Suddenly he pauses, a far away look glossing over his features, before snapping to the side with a-  “hih’ISHH’iew-! Tishh’iew-! hAH’ISHH’IEW-! Oh, bless me.”  Blushing slightly at the stare Rei points his direction, Kazuki gives a light shrug. “Don’t ask, I’m not sick, just a few sneezes, it can happen to anyone!” This time Rei definitely didn’t need words to convey his point, the eye roll said it all clearly.  ‘Whatever you say.’ Kazuki elects to ignore this one, settling instead for finishing his earlier sentence. “I’ll come back down when it’s time for you to take some more meds.” Rei nods, then gives Kazuki a look that nearly melts his entire being. The meaning of this one was also clear, and struck him right to his very core. ‘Thank you.’ “You’re welcome.” He whispers back, heading upstairs, and deciding he’ll attribute the fluttering in his chest to the cold. Better to admit that he’s catching an illness rather than the alternative… but the little voice inside him starts screaming once again: ‘You’re in love, you’re in love, you love him!’ 

[tea-cat-arts]

Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will

[crimson-constellations]

Spend the last week obsessing over moon spirit Sokka aus and ALSO working on my own designs cuz that’s just how I have fun soo LOOK AT MY BABY

+ some other doodles

[deoidesign]

For my birthday... read my webcomic! It's literally free! (Unless you want books. Those are not free)

It's beautiful, it's gentle, it's funny, they're canonically t4t and gay... And it's about time traveling vampires solving supernatural mysteries!

I've spent thousands of hours writing and drawing it, and it's really good! I'm not biased!

It's on hiatus right now and coming back in 2 months, so it's the perfect time to get caught up

[paranorahjones]

Love and Attraction in My Adventures with Superman

As someone who has never been particularly drawn by superhero media, I wasn't really sure what to expect when I first started watching My Adventures with Superman about a week ago. I had seen a few posts here on Tumblr that had piqued my interest, but all I really knew about it was that it was well-loved and had an art style that I knew I liked.

I absolutely did not expect to fall head over heels for the show entirely, or to be moved to tears multiple times by the wildly sweet, revolutionary relationship between this adaptation's Clark Kent and Lois Lane.

I say "revolutionary" because this romance touches on a lot of things that I feel are lacking in most modern portrayals of romance, and it handles them masterfully.

Most of what I reference/talk about in this post will focus on the first four episodes of season one (with a particular focus on the fourth episode, Let's Go to Ivo Tower, You Say) , because they are my favorite episodes and I think I can communicate what I want to by pulling mainly from those episodes. But I will be pulling bits and pieces from the whole series so consider yourself spoiler-warned.

The main point is this: I absolutely adore the way that physical attraction and emotional attraction are balanced between Clark and Lois.

The fact that this is possible comes from how well-crafted the dynamic is between the two of them; Lois' raw passion and energy inspires confidence and a mutual passion in Clark, and Clark's gentleness and kind heart inspire a tenderness in Lois that she was never given an outlet to show or receive. From this dynamic, a wealth of physical and emotional intimacy is naturally born. But never in the series do the two aspects of attraction feel out of balance; rather, they play off each other effortlessly. When one is brought into focus, the other quickly follows.

From the first episode and onward, it's obvious that Clark and Lois are awed by each other's physical appearance. Lois outright describes Clark as "beautiful" (which, if you saw one of my earlier posts from not too long ago, is something that makes me so incredibly happy to see in mainstream media).

To be fair, she doesn't say that to his face and says it in a moment of extreme frustration. But I still count it.

Anyways.

Upon seeing Lois for the first time, Clark is practically frozen in wonder for a good few seconds.

Lois, too, experiences this initial moment of attraction and almost immediately makes contact, with a playful punch to Clark's chest as he holds the door open for her.

This is a detail I really love, because first of all wow, I aspire to have her level of confidence. But also, it becomes clear early on in the series that Lois expresses herself very physically. She has no qualms regarding physical affection. Clark, on the other hand, is much more reserved and, at first, generally only initiates contact after an invitation from Lois, or after enough time has passed in their friendship for him to know that Lois is very physical and wouldn't have a problem with it.

There is also an immediate emphasis on Clark's concern for Lois' physical well-being. Take a sip of water every time Clark asks Lois if she's okay just in the first episode alone and you will be well hydrated.

Later on in this first episode, while trying to infiltrate a warehouse, Lois confidently asks Clark to boost her up to a window so she can get inside the building. Clark is immediately flustered, showing how much he feels out of his depth even with physical contact that, on the surface, would have no romantic connotations. (But to be fair, Lois is asking him to put his hands around her waist and lift her up when they literally just met like maybe six hours ago. I would be flustered too.)

And when Lois loses her balance and Clark effortlessly catches her, his first response (after blushing, of course) is to ask her:

Even in moments where the romantic tension is thick enough to cut with a knife and Clark clearly knows it, his first priority is to make sure she's okay.

And thus begins one of the strongest underlying themes throughout the whole building-up of their relationship, which is trust.

I'm gonna jump ahead now to the scene that inspired this whole post: the stairwell scene in episode four.

A basic rundown: Clark, Lois, and Jimmy are given an assignment to attend a tech unveiling for the city's top investors at Amazotech headquarters. Lois, naturally, ignores the parameters of the assignment and tries to use it as an opportunity to expose corruption in the city and get her stop-the-presses story. Clark very reluctantly follows her lead, believing that she will get herself into trouble . . . until Dr. Ivo, head of Amazotech, makes a few rude comments about Lois' appearance (Lois doesn't hear these, only Clark). This deeply irritates Clark and prompts him into revealing how much he knows about Dr. Ivo's corrupt business dealings, in an attempt to intimidate the truth out of Dr. Ivo, who responds by having Clark thrown out of the building and into a pile of garbage in an adjacent alleyway. Lois comes to find Clark (who is unhurt) and teases him about whether or not she should let him back in the building, since he didn't follow the assignment. Clark jokes that he doesn't even meet the dress code anymore, revealing that his suit jacket was torn as he was tossed out of the building.

Lois then reveals that she came prepared for this, and tells Clark to "take it off."

Clark immediately becomes flustered again and begins stammering as Lois pulls him back into the building by his jacket, continuing to tease him.

It's in these moments, as you can see, that the lighting of the scene changes. As soon as Lois says "take it off", everything is bathed in a rosy light. This happens frequently between these two; often, when we the audience are seeing one of these characters through the perspective of the other, the lighting takes on a very dreamy quality. This will come up again momentarily.

As Lois and Clark ascend the stairs, Lois removes her jacket and pulls a sewing kit from her pocket, admitting that she carries one on her because she herself has torn a lot of her clothing on her escapades.

The two then sit down on the stairs, and Clark removes his jacket. The lighting changes again, and we see Clark from Lois' eyes. It's clear by the dreamy lighting and the way that Lois blushes and involuntarily chokes out a "Wow . . ." that she is once again awed by him and deeply attracted to him on a physical level.

And this scene represents so much about their growing dynamic. It honestly has me floored.

But before I explain fully, I have to go on a tangent about my beloved Clark.

Throughout the beginning of the series, I believe Clark shows several signs that indicate that he is insecure about his physical appearance. Which you wouldn't expect, right? I mean, look at him. He's objectively a dreamboat. He was designed to be that way.

But at this stage of knowing so little about where he really came from or who he is, I think Clark struggles with not having a way to explain his physique. He admits that he wasn't an athlete in school; he was in the chess club. He doesn't work out as an adult. And yet he has the muscles of a bodybuilder. But, like so many other aspects of himself, he doesn't have a way to explain it. This causes a disconnect in how he sees himself physically; he likely feels as though he doesn't deserve his naturally impressive physique. And you could argue that he even does his best to hide it. As a civilian, he generally wears bulky, layered clothing like sweatshirts and sweaters. He slouches and carries himself in a very inward direction; his shoulders are often forward and his arms close to his sides, as if he is habitually attempting to make himself smaller.

This is one thing that brought me to tears when I saw it. The idea that a person can feel insecure about having physical attributes that would normally be seen as positive (and that they can't explain and/or feel that they don't deserve) is not very well-explored in media, but it is experienced by quite a few people, myself being one of them. But often in the real world when someone attempts to express this kind of insecurity, they are shut down and mocked and told to "be grateful" for what they have because others would envy them. Which I can say from personal experience is unbelievably damaging to a person's self image. So seeing this possibly be represented in Clark Kent himself was incredibly moving to me.

But back to the scene itself.

In the most recent gif above, this is the most vulnerable Lois has seen Clark thus far. What I think is so beautiful is the way that she invites him into this vulnerability by making herself vulnerable first.

Rewind a bit. Outside the building, Lois tells Clark to take his jacket off. Not a big deal, right? It's not like he's not wearing an undershirt. But Clark becomes flustered, not outright expressing that he's uncomfortable with this, but certainly indicating that he's not exactly at ease with it either.

Next we see them climbing up the stairs, and as they do so, Lois removes her own jacket and reveals her bare back to Clark in the process.

I believe this was incredibly intentional. This scene would have carried a very different tone if Lois' outfit was revealing in any other way. But the fact that her back is exposed symbolizes that she trusts him, in a physical and emotional sense. It's like when my cat Penny rolls on her back and exposes her fluffy tummy. Lois revealing this part of herself was her saying "I trust you, I feel safe with you, and I'll be vulnerable with you if you'll be vulnerable with me."

And only after that does Clark remove his jacket.

Because there is the factor of attraction at play, there is a lot of blushing and stammering going on in the beginning of this scene. These are two incredibly attractive people who are incredibly attracted to each other, after all. But immediately after the initial romantic tension, there is emotional vulnerability as well. Lois confides in Clark about her relationship with her dad, and the crippling self-doubt that she has kept very close to her chest. Clark jumps to reassure her in earnest, telling her that she has "changed his life for the better, in every possible way."

And that is what I meant at the beginning of the post when I mentioned balance.

Every moment of physical attraction in this series is followed by or harmonized with a moment of emotional vulnerability. Clark and Lois both invite each other deeper into each aspect of connection, and thus their relationship builds in an incredibly natural and beautiful way.

At this point, I think this post is about five miles long as the crow scrolls and I should probably stop now before all my thoughts run away with me. I could go on forever about the impact that this series and these characters have had on me, though. I will forever be grateful to the creators for giving us such an incredible series, and such a beautiful romance.

[bleue-flora]

Ok, I recently wrote an essay [here] talking about the definition and duties of civil engineering as well as the ethics because of the brain rot @swordfright gave me with calling Dream Sam’s ultimate engineering project. So, because I actually am a civil engineer I took it upon myself to design the title and summary of quantities sheets just like I do at work for roads but with Dream as the project instead. And in honor of angst day sponsored by @sixteenth-day-event, I figured I’d share it because I feel like it kinda works for the prison of the mind prompt.

“Sam’s “ultimate engineering project” he deemed too damaged like a bumpy road or crumbling building that wasn’t worthy of patching and filling in the cracks or reinforcing, that’s too eroded to be fixed and preserved. So, Sam strived to tear him down to the bedrock so he could remake, remold, and reengineer Dream according to his design for the common safety, public health and well-fair.”

{These are very similar to the actual sheets I make day to day, which I shall not share for the sake of doxing my location, but yea pretty much everything has a significance. Some of it doesn’t necessarily make sense but that was because I was more so taking inventory of what we see in lore (so you know I counted ;) lol)}

[eggnogtoast]

smoke break.

[sleepy-steve]

🧠🪱 Wiggly Wednesday Thursday 🧠 🪱

thank you for tagging me @stervrucht 🖤

no pressure tags: @frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe @stevesbipanic and of course anyone else that would like to ♡

thinking about Steve and Eddie who, after going through rounds of physical therapy after everything, continue to work out together because Steve obviously loves it and loves having a friend to work out with. and Eddie notices the difference in his stamina when he gets back to performing on stage. (and if Eddie likes to watch Steve work out a little bit, and likes Steve coming over to help his form more than a little bit, well that’s his business.) but Steve takes a dance class and shakes up his usual warmup, leaving Eddie with some… thoughts.

***

“Okay, Munson,” Steve says, pulling his arm across his body for a shoulder stretch. “You ready?”

“Ready to be tortured? Always,” Eddie jokes. It was their thing. Eddie acts like he hates being there, but he still shows up every other day to their local gym in Indianapolis. And he won’t ever deny the benefits he’s noticed since starting their exercise regime. He's faster on stage, doesn't get winded near as easily, holding those screaming notes without feeling like his lungs will explode. Little did he know that today his joke would come to be true.

Steve liked most kinds of exercise. He was a sporty guy. He liked the pull and stretch of his muscles, the feeling of accomplishment after achieving a new goal, that delicious soreness the day after a really good workout. But mostly he loved trying new things. He’d give anything half a chance if he thought it might be fun. Which is how he ended up at a dance-aerobics class the week prior, finding himself having a lot of fun, blushing furiously when the women in the class complimented how quickly he picks up the steps.

He went back three more times that week. Part of his enjoyment came from the new warmup he was taught in the class. Steve’s usual warmup consisted of basic stretches and a light jog, covering all bases to ensure he didn’t get injured, but not very exciting.

This, however, was far more enjoyable. Steve found himself sinking deep into stretches he didn't know he had flexibility for, and moving his hips to a beat, ultimately just having way more fun with the warmup. And it was about to become a huge problem for Eddie.

Steve pops his headphones over his ears, the tape deck tucked securely in his shorts pocket. He bends over, inhaling deeply as the song starts, rising up with his hands overhead, exhaling as he rolls his wrists, hips moving side to side with the beat. His already short cropped t-shirt rises, showing off a good amount of his chest. He lets his arms come down, bending over again, feeling the pull in his hamstrings. Gripping his elbows, he lets the top half of his body hang, swinging from side to side, his hamstrings fully stretched out.

Eddie looks up from his own basic stretching, shocked to see Steve fully bent over, because hey, since when was he so flexible? With Metallica blaring through his own headphones, Eddie just stares, completely forgetting where he was at in his warmup.

Steve lets his hands drop, moving to one foot, back to the centre, then the other foot. Ass just up in the air, his shorts way too tight. Eddie swallows. He’d been denying his crush for months at this point, and good god this was not helping.

Rolling his shoulders as he stands up, Steve lets his hands travel down his bare thighs, sinking into a squat with his back arched and head tilted back. Eddie's eyes are wide as he watches those tight little shorts with the little cut-ins on the sides ride up, showing far more of Steve's glorious hairy thighs than Eddie can handle. Steve drops his head forward, hunching his shoulders as he moves back to standing. He repeats the motions, and Eddie wishes he had the strength to pull his stare away from Steve's ass.

Seeing Steve's head tilted back and his back arched is sending Eddie insane. Like, he geninely thinks he might evaporate on the spot if he keeps watching. But he just can't look away.

Turning himself sideways, Steve has one foot stepped out in front of the other, legs perfectly straightened into a triangle shape, bent over his front leg. Just when Eddie thinks he’s about to get up and end his suffering, Steve lowers himself down into a lunge. His little shorts definitely way too small and tight for the movement, Steve lunges back and forth, fingertips resting on the ground on either side of his front foot. Eddie watches as the t-shirt rides up with each lunge, the desire to get his lips and tongue all over Steve's chest overwhelming him.

Shaking himself, Eddie tries to remember which shoulder stretch he was up to. He attempts something close to a stretch, but he can’t be sure he's doing it right, because Steve has lowered himself to the ground, front leg bent and back leg perfectly straight, and is fucking thrusting into the ground. If he were to ask Steve, he’d find out this was a hip flexor stretch. But Eddie’s forgotten how to form words entirely, suddenly imagining nineteen different ways he wants to get dicked down by the man before him.

Eddie suffers in silence, heart racing in his chest, watching as Steve repeats the movements on his other side. He prays that the torture ends soon, that they can just get to the workout, and Eddie can go back to pretending he doesn't want to ride Steve until his thighs give out. But Eddie gets no such luck.

Steve has moved into some kind of triangle position, hands on the ground, legs straight, and of fucking course, his ass in the air. Eddie marvels at how straight the shape is, only for a moment, because then Steve is lifting his heels up and down in turn, and jesus christ those tiny little shorts are just riding up, and Eddie can see a hint of Steve's ass peeking out. His jaw drops. He may actually explode.

Just when Eddie's thinking he can't take much more of this, Steve lowers himself down, knees spread wide, arms stretched out in front of him and head tucked down. A wild and rushed series of thoughts fly across Eddie's mind, all centred around Steve kneeling down in front of him. Eddie needs to get it together quickly.

As Steve brings himself back up to the triangle position, walking his feet to meet his hands and rolling his spine up, shoulders and head rolling back last, he sees Eddie taking off for his warmup jog. Assuming that he probably just took too long with his new warmup, Steve shrugs it off and starts his jog shortly after.

Eddie hits his personal best in several weights that day, desperately trying to expend his excess energy in some way. He barely registers the wins, mind still stuck on Steve and his perfect ass in all those new positions. He almost dissolves on the spot when Steve claps him on the shoulder in congratuations.

At the end of their session, Eddie takes a freezing cold shower and prays for the sweet release of death.

[caeslxys]

Something I think is extremely interesting thematically when it comes to connecting what Downfall and the ideas it tackled to the overarching narrative of campaign three is that the things Downfall made a point to showcase of Aeor—Cassida, Hallis, the visual of an aeormaton proposing to her partner, the specific and intentional decision to shed light on a far from insignificant amount of the population being civilians or refugees—is that it plays in perfect parallel across from what is happening (and, really, has been happening) to the ruidusborn on Exandria in present.

Bear with me for a moment. Aeor is ultimately a city that was collectively punished for the decisions of its leadership. We could (and, judging by the amount of discourse around this particular topic already, probably will) argue about what the Gods’ motivation for all of this was—whether it be that they could not, in the end, bear to kill their siblings or that they were terrified at the prospect of mortality—for me it is a very healthy dose of both—but for this I am much more interested in the latter. They were scared. That, really, is the driving force behind both this arc and their role in c3 as a whole.

Why I point this out is: It is far more interesting to me, especially as we go back to Bells Hells this week, to dissect the Gods and their decisions not purely on sympathetic motivation alone but as beings in the highest seat of power in the highest social class in Exandria.

So, having established that the Gods (in relation to mortals) are more a higher social class than anything we could compare to our real life understanding of divinity and that Aeor was eviscerated largely because of their fear—what is the difference between those innocents in Aeor caught in the trappings of their autocratic government leadership and a divine war on the ground, and those of the ruidusborn being manipulated both by Ludinus and by the very thing that inspired such visceral fear in the Gods to start with. I would argue very little.

I think of Cassida, doing what she genuinely thought was right and good and would save people, her son, and the object of her worship—and how that did not matter enough to any of them to spare her because of the fear they held at the very concept of mortality. I think of Liliana and Imogen, one of which we know begged for the gods to help her or send her a sign for years on years, and how every single one of their largest struggles could have been avoided had the gods loved them, their supposed children, as much as they feared what they could be. I think of how the thing that did save Imogen, in the end, was a woman who herself existed in direct defiance of the gods will. I think of that young boy, sixteen years old, that Laudna exalted on Ruidus.

I think it’s completely fair to judge Aeor’s overall society as deeply corrupt—it was!—but its leadership and police force are not a reflection of every one of its citizens. Similarly, it is fair to judge the Ruby Vanguard as corrupt—it is!—but its multiple heads of leadership and even the god-eater further are not a reflection of every one of its members.

Notably, and what I think the Hells will latch onto, this did not matter to the Gods. It did not matter that Cassida was trying to help. She was still too much of a risk. Will it matter, what Imogen does? Will it matter, if that young boy is in the blast radius when they decide to take no further chances?

I’ve seen a lot of people say that the Hells will side with the gods and I don’t think I agree. Especially as Imogen has been scolded and villainized over and over for daring to try and save her mother—who herself has been seen by some as an irredeemable evil in spite of her drive being the exact same—her family—but when it’s the Gods it’s justified? When it’s the Gods, it’s sympathetic? Too sympathetic to criticize further than “they’re family”?

I obviously do not think the Gods should die or be eaten or what have you, and I certainly don’t agree with Ludinus (though I find him much more compelling than just a variation of hubris wizard), but when talking about the Gods in Aeor and in present it isn’t really at all about their motivation or their family. It can’t be. Too many people, including our active protagonists, lives have been effected for it to be as cut and dry as “they’re family”. These are your children. They are your family, too.

[magnusbae]

tfw you've spent years thinking that your padawan's trail of thoughts is the most random thing in the galaxy, spent countless hours in a state of bafflement, did your best to follow every single thread with patient answers and explanations— only to discover that he's just shite at shielding and subconsciously snoops around ¯_(ツ)_/¯

[jadewritesficshere]

Steddie x female!reader thought 18+ only

Eddie blinks his eyes a couple of times to make sure he is actually seeing what he is seeing. He must be living in a nightmare.

You're laying back on one of the pool loungers. One leg dangling over the edge keeping your foot on the warm cement ground, the other spread over Steve's lap as he absently rubs his hand up and down it while he bitches to you about something from work. Your hand rubs up and down Steve's back in comfort. But that isn't the nightmare.

Your bright red bikini bottoms covering enough, but with your legs spread a bit more skin is shown then intended. Spread in such a way that makes Eddie want to just dive in. Get on his knees and worship you, rub his face over your mound as he licks and nips and sucks. Moan as the curly thatch of hair brushes against his face.

Except the curls of hair he is expecting to see peeking around your bikini are gone. Just smooth bare skin. And that isn't the only nightmare. Steve's chest is smooth like when he was in school on the swim team. Not a speck of that beautiful chest hair Eddie would curl into after getting hot and heavy. Not a single curl of the "love rug" he jokingly called it.

Eddie wants to weep. To throw himself down like a little kid and thrash his arms and legs around. Yeah, it's your body and you can do what you want, but he still is sad its gone. Eddie doesn't like change, and suddenly walking in to see both of his partners change something without any warning? Uncomfortable. It makes Eddie feel itchy.

Eddie can barely speak as he walks over and sits next to Steve. He doesn't respond to Steve's warm greeting. Doesn't respond to you asking how the day is. Just stares with big wet eyes at the sight in front of him. A pout on his lips.

A warm hand lands on his shoulder, gently squeezing. Steve's brow furrowed in concern, your wide eyes blinking at him.

"Shaved?" Eddie asks in a quiet voice, eyes darting to Steve's chest and then your clothed pussy. Steve lets out a huff of laughter, "Fuck, thought something was wrong man." Eddie glares," It is."

[poisonousquinzel]

when i totally inevitably get around to actually writing that coffee shop au i brought up in uhhhhhhh 2020(??) this is definitely the kinda Ivy design vibe she'll have <3

[clowningaroundmars]

aromantic mike chilton for @aggressivelyarospec week!!!! :D

accompanying story under the cut!

It didn't work out with Julie.

They had broken up and decided it would be best to stay friends. After all, with Mike... nothing really changed at all. Like... nothing.

And that was kinda the problem.

Julie didn't think herself to be too judgmental of a person, not after everything everyone's been through. She and the Burners worked hard, played hard, and succeeded together (oftentimes against all odds).

They slept in cuddle piles after dinner some nights whenever Julie could slip away for more than a day without arousing her dad's suspicions. They passed bongs around for a lung-hacking hit or two, went skinny-dipping in the lake at night, patched up each other's bloody wounds countless times.

And then somewhere down the line, Julie fell in love with Mike.

She had no idea when exactly, since she doesn't really do feelings like that, can't afford to with a life like hers. But it happened... somehow.

Julie couldn't quite place exactly what it was that initially drew her to him, especially at first. Sure, the guy was friendly, decisive, assertive without being too overbearing, and unbearably charming. But.

It was the charm that caught poor Julie totally off-guard, really. She'd often hear her father ranting and raving about his golden-prodigal-son-turned-traitor, and his ID photo in his file wasn't really much to look at, either. Julie would never admit it out loud, but she had snuck down to Motorcity for the first time ever with low expectations.

Later, she came back up to her pod in Deluxe with stars in her eyes.

But she wasn't in love with him then, no. She knew this because she was pretty sure her constant Mike Thoughts did not manifest until after the kids all went to Antonio's together for the first time.

It was summertime, around nine months after the group was (un)officially formed. The heat had Mike shirking his jacket and leaving it in Mutt, and his old t-shirt was getting a tad bit tight after all the exercise he was getting around the hideout, especially after Texas moved his workout gear in and Mike took him up on his offer for semi-regular sparring sessions.

And boy, did that Mike fella fill out. Mhmm.

Even Julie-- a girl who was mostly blind to typical male affections directed at her in school-- had to admit to herself that when Mike put on a little more weight in the right places, when his biceps bulged a bit as he flexed an arm and his shoulders got a bit wider... it took a lot more effort to wrench her studious gaze away.

Geez Louise.

Before long, she was doodling their initials and combining both of their names in her little sketchpad. Gag. Gross.

But Mike never seemed to pay attention to her the same way in return. She didn't catch him looking away from her at inopportune times, and he'd never lay a single hand on her aside from a typical friendly pat on the shoulder, or a comfortable lean on an arm while the Burners all lounged around during movie nights. Hell, he seemed more affectionate with his best friend Chuck than he was with her most times.

So she kept her thoughts to herself. Easy peasy. She kept secrets from her dad, from her friends, and now from Mike. Like everything else, she created a neat, separate file in her head and tucked that little secret away. She managed to conceal it for long enough.

Until it became too big to ignore.

And then it happened.

And it really just... happened. Julie hardly registered herself even doing it.

It happened like this: Mike had rescued Julie from certain death at the lake after she crashed an out-of-control 9 Lives out through the barricades and into the water, and they were panting and coughing up water on the sand after Mike succeeded in dragging her out. Dutch and Texas were busy racing around and distracting the Kanebots, luring them all away from the pair.

Julie didn't say anything. Neither of them did. Julie just... surged forward when she blinked the water out of her eyes and saw him, his angelic face hovering mere inches away from hers. She remembered the dewey drops on his long lashes and the warmth of his lips more than anything else.

And then she's pretty sure she blacked out afterwards because the next thing she remembers, she's waking up on the couch wrapped in blankets and towels, wearing Chuck's hoodie.

She doesn't ask anyone why Chuck opted to be the guy to lend his clothes to her.

(It wasn't Chuck who lent it to her though.)

After Jacob makes sure she has a steaming mug of soup in her hands and is generally fussed over enough, he bids her a goodnight and leaves a big holoscreen playing old-timey anime shows for her.

Shortly afterwards, Mike slips into the room on feet far too quiet for a rowdy teenage boy like him. Julie almost misses his entry and startles when she notices him casually leaning on a wall over to her right, almost blending in against the garish grafitti and street signs.

They sat down and spoke quietly, privately.

Julie appreciated that Mike had enough tact and forethought not to confront her in front of all of the guys. Thank god. Julie wouldn't even know how to handle the endless teasing that would inevitably assault her from all angles if they ever even suspected that she had a crush on Mike.

And how embarrassing, really! The only girl on the team falling for the charming and roguish leader of a group of rebels. Double gag.

It was by some miracle that no one ever suspected Julie's true feelings, and that the actual love interest found out before anyone else did. Lucky her!

And incredibly, Mike shared her feelings too! Who would've thought it! Definitely not Julie, that's for sure.

Mike hadn't even seemed to glance her way at all in all the time they had known each other. He always maintained the same level of friendliness with her as he did with the other guys. But he confessed then that he knew Julie was special, and that their bond that grew in the time they had known each other was special, too.

Wow. Look at them, both hiding their feelings so well! It's like they were meant to be.

So they agreed to go steady.

Eventually, they told the rest of the Burners. Well, it really was just that it was kinda hard for them to ignore when Julie would sneak her index finger over to Mike's hand and hook it onto his pinkie as they walked back to their cars after a quick errand run for the Skylarks or an easy mission.

So they decided to make the announcement at Antonio's, which Julie thought was perfectly poetic. It was where she first fell in love with Mike, and now here they were a year and a half later, making it official.

They didn't expect the other guys' reactions, though. The Burners received the news... lukewarmly.

"You guys were in love?" Texas spewed bits of pizza all over the table as he chewed with his mouth open. Ugh. Typical Texas.

"Oh! Wow... uhm. Congrats, guys." Chuck seemed to hide behind his hair even more as his shoulders hiked up in a nonchalant shrug.

Dutch rubbed his chin. "...Yeah. Uh, yeah...? Cool. Congrats, you two."

And then silence fell over the table.

"Is... is there a problem with this, or?" Julie dared to press.

Everyone silently exchanged glances.

Mike-- bless his heart-- misread the situation and clasped his hands together on the table.

"Guys, look," he started, "this isn't gonna change anything about the team. We're still gonna be friends, I’m not prioritizing Julie over anyone else on missions. It's just... we're gonna... we're gonna be the Burners, except I’m dating Jules now! That's all!"

Mike smiled warmly at all his friends. Chuck chewed on his lip.

Dutch bobbed his head thoughtfully. Then, after a while, he said "nah, yeah. We figured. I mean, you're a pretty great guy so it's not like we thought you were gonna up and abandon us or anything. It's just that... uh. So when did this uhhh, yanno, this whole thing start?"

Julie blinked.

Mike cocked his head. "Start?" He asked.

"Y'know, like when did y'all start liking each other? Because uh, no offense, but this is kinda comin' out of the blue for us. Literally nobody thought this was gonna be a thing. Tell us some stories!"

Mike blew out a breath and leaned back in the booth. Julie smiled.

"Weeeellll," Julie squinted with excitement and then let the cat out of the bag.

She told them all about it, how in this very same booth she watched as Mike's t-shirt stretched over his muscles all those months ago and how his smile seemed to shine brighter than the diner's neon signs. Then about how she leaned against Mike's broad chest after agonizing for hours over not being able to free him from her father's maximum-security prison that one time. About all the dreams she'd have of them together, the intimate late-night talks they'd have while having a couple of drinks on the rooftop of some abandoned building. How she loved his bright eyes and strong hands...

When she finished, she had a dreamy kind of look all over her face. Mike had a brow quirked, but he smiled back at her all the same.

Everyone exchanged glances again.

"So Mike. Was it like that for you?" Chuck asked eventually. It had a strange sort of lilt to it, like he was in on an inside joke that Julie wasn't.

She bristled a bit.

"Oh! Uh." Mike glanced around quickly. "Not... really? But Julie's super pretty, so when she confessed to me, I was pretty stoked."

Mike grinned like a goofball. Julie grinned like a goofball. The rest of the Burners looked skeptical.

"Hm. Cool! Well, great." Chuck turned back to his loaded pizza slice.

And just like that, things mostly went back to normal.

And, uh... Mike was right, this... really wasn't changing anything between them and the Burners. Like at all.

A small part of Julie was kind of hurt by it, but she tried to wave the feeling away. It was nonsense, and she should be happy. Mike loved her! He just wasn't a romantic type, that's all. He loved his friends, loved being a Burner... it was fine.

Right?

It was normal for her to have to remind Mike every now and then to go out on a date with her. He's a busy guy, and this was his first relationship. Julie just had to be patient.

Patient... patient. Yeah. She could be patient.

It was when Chuck joined them for their sixth "movie date" in a row that the patience was starting to run a bit thin, though.

Chuck and Mike settled side-by-side on the communal couch, swapping snacks as easily as breathing and nursing a popcorn bowl between them. Mike hooked an arm over Julie's shoulder though, so Julie said nothing.

It was a couple of months later when Mike makes a quiet confession to her as they laid together in his pristine bed one night.

"I don't really like kissing all that much," he mumbles, face half-buried into his pillows. "But I like holding you. Is that okay?"

Julie's heart sinks into the covers. But she nods anyways. "Yeah. That's okay."

"Really? Do ya mean it? It's not weird or anything, right? We can still be together but not kiss. Maybe I can give you forehead kisses instead?"

Julie sighed softly. "Mmnyeah, that's fine."

"It's not you, it's me, Jules. I just--"

"Mike. Trust me, I get it. It's okay, seriously."

Mike gave her a grateful smile back.

Damnit. Well.

Anyways, life continued on. Julie resigned herself to accepting the fact that her boyfriend was just simply a guy's guy.

Julie liked cars but Mike was all over Mutt. Loved the damn thing more than he loved her, honestly. She loved being a Burner, but it seemed like it was Mike's purpose, like he was more devoted to the city under the dome than he was to his girlfriend. And above all, Mike loved the Burners. All of them. He spent a bit more time with Chuck than he did with anyone else in the team, but he was always there for everyone just as passionately.

Which was. Fine.

Freeing Motorcity from her father's reign of terror was indeed way more important than holding hands with a cute boy!

Duh, of course, stupid Julie.

Whatever.

When they inevitably broke up, it blindsided Mike. He thought they were the best of buds! The bestest of buds-- aside from him and Chuck, of course! But while he loved Chuck fiercely, his love for Julie was... different. Fierce but different. He could never describe it in words but he knew what he was feeling was real.

He loved Julie! So when she suddenly broke up with him, it was like getting hit with a sack of flour out of nowhere.

They were leaned up against Mutt's hood on a cliff overlooking Lake Erie when Julie finally broke the news. They were casually smoking a cigarette, passing it back and forth. Mike's idea of a "date." Anyways.

"I can't really keep doing this, Mike." Julie sighed out a cloud of smoke. She said it so matter-of-factly, as casually as if she were simply commenting on the weather.

Mike whipped round to look at her. "Keep doing what?"

"This," Julie threw her hands up and tucked them into her vest pockets after handing Mike the cigarette back. "This... 'relationship'. It's not working out."

"What... whaddya mean? We just started dating, it's kinda too early to tell--"

"No, Mike." Julie interrupted loudly. Her eyes were avoiding Mike's face carefully. "No... it's not. We've been together for months and we have never moved on from our friendship. You... just admit it, dude. You're just not into me."

Mike pushed himself off of Mutt and placed his hands on both of her shoulders, forcing them to stand face-to-face. "Julie, look at me." He had his jaw set.

Julie swallowed as she peered up at him from her bangs.

"I love you more than you can ever know. I know I’m messing up, but... but I’m trying, okay? Just give us one more chance, Jules. I can make it right, I know it!"

Julie took a step back, wrinkling her nose. "Mike! Just give it up, okay? I know you don't feel the same about me as I do about you," she pleaded, mortified. "It's okay! It's fine! We can just move on and let it go!"

"B-but it's not! No, Julie c'mon, bro--"

"Bro?!" Julie exploded, hands in the air now. "Are you hearing yourself right now? Am I your girlfriend, or your bro?"

Mike gaped at her like a fish, mouth opening just to close again. Then, he hunched his shoulders and shoved his hands in his pockets.

He kicked a couple of rocks off the cliff, watching the pebbles scatter and plummet dozens of feet below.

Then he ran his hands through his hair, a nervous habit of his, before returning back to Julie.

He exhaled loudly. "What... what's the difference? You... isn't that what dating is all about? Being best friends with your partner?"

Julie glared at him. "Yes! And it's also about being more than that, too!"

Mike scoffed. "More than friends? What does that even mean? Nothing is more important than friendship, Jules. Not in Motorcity."

"Nothing is more important than friendship?! Mike--" Here, Julie took a step back to pinch her nose and exhale. "Look. When I confessed my feelings to you for the first time, what were you feeling?"

"What was I feeling? Uh, I dunno, happiness I guess? What, did you want me to say that I didn't care? I care about your feelings, Julie! I do!"

"So you started dating me because you didn't want to hurt my feelings?!" Julie shouted.

"Where are you getting that from?!" Mike shouted back.

"Mike! You are just not into me! I can just tell! It's okay! W-we can just be friends, like how we used to be. I don't even know why you're fighting me so hard on this, I'm the one breaking up with you. You can't change my mind!"

"Right," Mike huffed, "because you don't love me anymore. No, I get it. It's fine."

They glared at each other for a beat.

Then, Julie shoved her hands back into her vest pockets. "No, Mike. I do love you. I just think..." she sighed, all the wind in her sails blowing away, "I just think it's best for us to go our own separate ways."

Mike startled. "Wait, what? Jules... are you...? You're not leaving the Burners, are you?"

"No, I'm not leaving the Burners." Julie says through clenched teeth. "I'm just gonna take a quick break and then when I come back? We're gonna be just friends again, Mike. Alright?"

Mike inhales deeply, his own anger trickling out of him like water as well. "... Fine. Fine, yeah. Whatever you want, Julie." He hangs his head.

They then stare off into the horizon together, watching the twinkling star-like pinpoints of light on the underside of the dome. Watching as the lake's waters undulate and shimmer in the darkness of the cool evening, a gigantic dark mirror reflecting the pinpoints back to the ceiling.

Mike idly scuffs his boot on the ground again, putting out their shared cigarette. In a sad sort of way, the dying ember of the smoldering stick being stomped out into rocks and gravel was a lot like their relationship: dead and done. And of course it had to be Mike to put them both out, huh. Right.

Real poetic.

Julie turns around wordlessly, climbs into Mutt and sits in Chuck's seat.

Time to go.

After a few seconds Mike nods once, fixes his collar and slides into his own seat.

The ride back up to Deluxe is quiet.

Except this time, it had been a long while since they had the time to relax like this. These days, Kane's attacks were getting more and more savage, brutal... and cunning.

It was a couple years later when the kids were a bit older --but not that much older at the same time-- that they all filed past the doors of Antonio's and slid right into their usual booth.

Kane's latest attempt at a hostile takeover of Motorcity involved way too many sneaky double-crossing spies all trying to break the Burners up and weaken the city's best defense. Sneaky bastard, that Abraham Kane.

But they thwarted him yet again, despite it all. They beat the bad guys, restored peace back amongst the gangs and the civilians, and saved the day.

It had taken weeks this time, but they succeeded.

So now to celebrate, they're placing their orders for the greasiest, most heart-clogging fast food on the menu and sitting back to happily sip at their drinks. They're finally enjoying their time together again, and Mike is especially pleased that everyone made it out alive.

Sitting elbow-to-elbow with his bestest friends in the world, Mike takes advantage of a lull in the conversation to clap his hands together and get everyone's attention.

"Okay, guys!" He announces. "So, I'm pretty sure we're all kinda fried after... y'know, everything. Everyone's probably too tired to care about what I'm going to say next! So... confession time."

"Hmhmm! Spill, then," Chuck smirks, his chin in his cyborg hand. It was a recent upgrade to his prosthetic, and it shone a beautiful silvery-blue under the diner lights.

Mike chuckles nervously. "Uh, I... I think that... I figured out that I can't fall in love!"

Everyone stares at him.

Chuck casually slurps his milkshake through a straw.

Dutch turns to him then. "Wait. You knew?"

Chuck sits up. "Uhh hahaha, whoa. Where'd that come from? You psychic or somethin'?" He deflects awkwardly.

"You're clearly not surprised," Dutch points out.

"Pfft yeah I'm not surprised. Who's been Mike's best friend since, like, kindergarten again?"

"Ah. And ya didn't think to let me know anything back when we were dating? Sure would've saved us a lot of time," Julie quipped drily.

Chuck holds his mismatched hands up. "Now hold on a minute! I didn't know back then, obviously. Besides, you two dated years ago for like... three seconds!"

"Two years ago, smartass," Julie snips back.

Mike clears his throat conspicuously. "Guys! Guys, no need to fight over me," he jokes awkwardly, "because I, uhm, I've decided I don't belong to anybody! I'm just me, and I'm not dating anyone. Like, ever."

Everyone turns back to him again.

With four pairs of eyes on him, Mike draws in on himself a bit as he continues. "Yeah, it's. It's something that I've been kinda discovering about myself and I'm still... exploring it. But I'm pretty sure I've never had a crush in my life. I was just walking through life distracted by everything else for so long that I never noticed it, but... yeah. I've just. I've just never felt love for anyone else before, I guess."

"Which is fine," Chuck blurts out suddenly. "It's... it's fine! That Mike's never fallen in love with anyone. It happens. Some people just don't experience a common thing most people do... like romance, or sex. Yeah! Totally normal!"

Dutch smirks at Chuck. "You too, then? You a non-romantic as well?"

Chuck shakes his head so hard his bangs swing. "No! Nuh uh, I'm a lover, not a fighter. I'm definitely a romantic!"

"Why so nervous all of a sudden, then?"

"Because," Chuck replies, "because... it's fine! To not ever fall in love or like... date, or kiss or have sex or whatever. We're in Motorcity now, and we can get to do whatever we want. And if we don't wanna date, then we don't have to!" Then he clamps his mouth shut.

Mike perks up then. "That's right! And ah, yeah! Speaking of, Chuckles... lemme tell ya, I really gotta hand it to ya. If it weren't for you, I'd've never figured this one out. So, thanks, buddy! As always, you really had my back on this one."

Chuck and Mike smile at each other and Texas raises a brow.

"Huh?" Texas says. "What's that s'posed to mean?"

Chuck titters nervously as Mike pulls up a screen and opens up a forum.

"It means that Chuckles here helped me find a site that explained everything I was experiencing! Or... not experiencing, really."

Chuck clears his throat, clearly relieved. "Uh, yeah! Well, after Mike's like, 10th girlfriend that one time he couldn't stop bringing people back home, he came to me all frustrated and stuff and... well, we went off to find my friends in the LARPing arena to see if anyone had any idea why he was burning through dates like Mutt burns through tires. And so someone suggested he might be aromantic, and uh... well, the rest is history!"

Dutch and Julie hummed in acknowledgement.

Everyone knew what that was like, how weird it was that Golden Child Mike all of sudden started bringing people home from parties and bars shortly after his breakup with Julie. Sometimes he even had two people on his arms, some men, some women. Never the same person after two or three times, though.

They were all perplexed when they first heard laughing and chattering behind Mike's bedroom door. Once the moaning started, though... well! Everyone poked fun at him the mornings after and teased him to varying degrees, but things were mostly chill in the beginning.

Everyone remembered Mike's frustrations after a while, though. How he could never quite land a steady relationship-- no matter how hard he tried, with whoever. It got to the point where the Burners stopped their teasing and became quite concerned after Mike introduced his 5th girlfriend in the span of like... 6 months, once upon a time.

It was shortly after his final breakup that Mike flopped down onto his best friend's messy bed one evening and finally had The Conversation.

It went well, all things considered. Chuck, patient as ever, listened to his friend and then when he couldn't offer any solid advice, he offered a distraction. The LARPing arena proved to be much better help than they could ever hope for.

Ever since then, Mike's been up late into the night often, completely engrossed in all things aromantic. He wanted to learn more about it, yearned for a community that knew exactly what he was feeling; so he stayed awake just swiping through sites and PDFs on his holoscreens, eating every bit of information up.

Now, it looked like Mike was at peace with himself and his station in life after all this time. That was a relief!

"Aromantic! That's it! Look at this, guys." Here, Mike grins and pulls up a photo of a striped flag. "This is the community flag. Look familiar?"

The colors of the flag had two shades of green at the top that then cascaded into white, then grey and then black.

Texas leaned forward. "It looks like Mutt!" He practically shouts.

Everyone laughs.

"Yeah, that sure is a you flag if I've ever seen one," Julie quips.

"Right? Like it was meant to be! So I guess I'm part of this community, then. I mean, this really is a kickass flag..."

"But what does that mean, though? That you can never fall in love with anyone, ever?" Julie asks.

Mike closes his screens and clasps his hands on the table, exhaling a bit. "Uhh, well? Well, yeah! I can't ever fall in love... but it doesn't feel that way to me! Ugh, I'm probably gonna do such a bad job explaining this," he laughs self-consciously.

"It's okay, dude. Take your time," Dutch smiles warmly.

Mike shoots him a grateful smile back. "... It... it's like. Well? It's like... I've never felt butterflies in my stomach before, so I have no idea what that's like. But I like you guys, a lot. Like a lot, a lot. I love hanging out with you all even though I don't think about any of you guys like that. I love making friends-- like true friends-- and I can't stop thinking about how happy hanging out with people makes me. I guess I'm just way more platonic than romantic, because I am just... so bad at love! God, I've never had so much trouble with anything in my life before like I have with romance," he groans, grimacing.

"And when Mike Fucking Chilton says that, that's how you know he's struggling!" Dutch puts in.

Everyone giggles.

"Wow," Julie gives Mike a side-long glance. "Finally. Something that The Great Mike Chilton is bad at! We've finally got him, boys."

Texas leaps out of his seat and enthusiastically karate-chops the air. "Hoo-WAH!!! Finally! Something I got over on ya, Mike. Texas is better at romancing than you!"

Julie rolls her eyes.

Mike guffaws. "Psshhwhat? C'mon guys, I'm bad at plenty of stuff. This isn't the first!"

"Oh yeah? Name one thing!" Dutch challenges.

"Uhhm well uh, I...? I'm pretty bad at... hm." Mike drums his fingers on the table. "I'm bad at coding! I'm not nearly as good as Chuck at the software and tech side of things!"

"But ya could be! You could totally learn how to, if you'd just sit down with me for more than 20 minutes," Chuck points out.

Mike stubbornly folds his arms across his chest. "Well, I don't wanna! What're you gonna do about it?"

And just like that, the kids all return back to normalcy, bickering and quibbling about nothing as they finally receive their food from the waitress. Soon after, Chuck and Texas are throwing pizza toppings and wadded up paper at each other and Mike is mom-ing at them to quit it before they all get kicked out.

It was as if nothing even happened.

It was simultaneously comforting and also thrilling how easily Mike was accepted back into the fold; the Burners' Heartless Leader who could never fall in love.

On the inside, Mike was deeply grateful and his heart felt full upon learning this, though. It was a nourishing feeling that his bestest friends in the whole world who worked hard, played hard, lived fast and free alongside him... they loved him and accepted him back, no matter what. It was a much nicer and fuzzier feeling than any romance-filled relationship or hookup ever gave him.

Now, the Burners are finally leaving the diner, all tipsy and giddy from their impromptu late-night happy hour session.

Mike has a casual arm slung over Chuck's shoulder as they traipse on over to Mutt. Everyone casually daps each other up and offers quick goodbyes before climbing into their respective cars.

Mike slides behind the wheel and exhales. Chuck clicks himself into his secure harness.

"Well! That went pretty well! A little too easily, honestly but," Mike breathes.

Chuck's blonde head bobs. "Well yeah, dude. Of course. What'd ya think, that'd we kick you out of the team for that?"

Mike shrugs and turns his skeleton key into Mutt's ignition, bringing her to roar awake again. "I mean... no. But, y'know. It's weird, having a leader of a gang that can't ever fall in love, right? Like some heartless freak or somethin'. I dunno," he chuckled wryly.

Chuck frowns. "Mike. You're not a freak," he says firmly.

Mike gives his best friend a sidelong glance. "Chuck..." he speaks, voice low, "it's not like that! You know what I mean... it's just that sometimes people who are different don't get treated so well all the time, yanno?"

"Yeah, sure, back up in Deluxe," Chuck argues. "But it's different down here in Motorcity. It's good here for people like us!"

Mike hums thoughtfully as he drums his fingers on the wheel. "Yeah, you're right..." then, he smirks at Chuck. "So if that's true, then why didn't you come out, back there? I actually thought you were gonna do it. It even looked like Dutch suspected something, too!"

Mike smiles at his friend, who is doing his best impression of a carseat cover now.

"Mmnyeah... yeah, I could've." Chuck gives a noncommittal shrug, hesitating.

"What's wrong?"

After a few seconds, Chuck swipes at his bangs self-consciously and clears his throat. "Uhmm well... being aromantic and never falling in love is kinda... badass, don'tcha think? But for a guy like me, never wanting to have sex and being a dope for romance is just pathetic," he laments. "If people hear that I'm asexual and that I never want to bang anyone, I'd get laughed out of the room! It's not an asexual thing, Mikey, it's a me thing."

Mike throws Mutt into reverse and backs her out of their parking spot with practiced ease.

"Chuckles. My guy. Look, who cares what other people think? If you don't wanna bone, you're just not gonna. That doesn't hurt anyone at all, so screw anyone who says anything about it. If anyone gives you a hard time, call me up and I'll spin the block for you,"

Chuck bursts into a peal of nervous giggles. "Whoa, whoa Mikey, geez! Christ, thanks, man but that's really not necessary. I appreciate you, though,"

They smile at each other again.

Then after a beat, Mike adds, "plus, if they know about aromanticism, they're gonna eventually find out about asexuality, too, dude."

Chuck laughs weakly as he clutches his arms. "O-oh...! Yeah... yeah that's tr--"

Mike suddenly slams his boot down on the gas pedal and Mutt growls as she lurches into hundred-mile-speeds from a standstill. Her tires screech loudly on the pavement and she leaves a giant plume of smoke and dirt behind as everyone careens over a drop straight onto the Deluxian Supply Pipes.

"Miiikkee-eeyyyy!!! We just ate!" Chuck screeches, horrified. He clings onto the car seat with both hands as Mike laughs.

Chuck's screams and Mike's loud, joyous shouting and whooping can be heard far and wide throughout Motorcity as they race all the way back home.

[goldengrecha]

How are we feeling today, people who read pokespe?

[deoidesign]

I was gonna do a pinup but he kept posing cute idk what happened

[shower-phantom-ideas]

Yall imagine Danny getting help from Batman and tells him about how hes on the run (it was a joke in passing smh) and how he has no home (it was ment to be funny man) then all of a sudden Bruce way shows up on a totally casual stroll in his neighbourhood. “Oh look a child who is in need laaa dee daa let me help you poor random child who I have no idea who you are.” As if Danny is an idiot. He isnt fooled in the slightest. He knows when something is up. Batman clearly is using Bruce Wayne to help kids off the street.

Danny is staying at Wayne manner and notices how no one really talks about the bats. Or tif they do Bruce gets this look then quickly changes the subject. Hes putting so much effort into it too. And at first Danny hardly noticed. Now it’s obvious theres a connection. At first he thought Bruce Wayne hated batman with how often he refused to comment or gave his kids a glare when they mentioned the big bad bat. But now it’s clearly something else. Danny got a chance to talk to the commissioner alone and then it clicked. Danny had asked whats Mr.Waynes beef with Batman and the commissioner seemed so confused. Quickly telling Danny about how the two have worked together. How Bruce has even helped the bat with information or a distraction from time to time. Why would Danny think that he hated him???

And BAM Danny had it. Bruce Wayne is dating THE Batman!!! Holy shit it makes so much sense. Danny would often find batgear around the house. Bruce probably got targeted a bunch and thats probably how they met.

Now hes trying so hard to be supported of his clearly closeted father figure. He also gets why it’s not public info too. Paints a huge target on Bruce. Plus his many many kids. Must be hard for them. What a crazy life they live. Jason would probably be so jealous of their literal fairytale romance.

Danny tells Bruce that he is supported by him and that his secret is safe until hes ready to tell anyone else. Bruce niw thinking Danny knows hes batman shows up no mask and Danny goes nuts. “You can’t out yourself in danger to protect him bruce!!! You are just some himbo man!!! He wouldnt want this!!!” Thinking Bruce is going to try and fight in Batmans place.

Then Danny walks up and places a hand on bruces should (he has to reach lmao shorty). “I will go. I will keep everyone safe. You can count in me” transforms snd flys off to defeat the big bad. Leaving a fully stunned and confused bruce.