#but that's gotta be the most I've ever read in on year and it's been so nice

[vinceaddams]

Any tips on learning to make buttonholes? I've been putting it off for.... *checks notes* like three years.... but better late than never and all that. I don't have any fancy machines so I gotta do it by hand but that seems right up your alley.

Thanks!

It IS up my alley, yes, I do most of my buttonholes by hand!

I'm actually part way through filming an 18th century buttonhole tutorial, but I expect it'll be a few more weeks before I finish that and put it on the youtubes, so in the meantime here's the very very short version. (The long version is looking like it'll probably be about 40 minutes maybe, judging by how much script I've written compared to my last video?)

Mark your line, a bit longer than your button is wide. I usually use a graphite mechanical pencil on light fabrics, and a light coloured pencil crayon on dark ones. (I have fabric pencils too, but they're much softer and leave a thicker line.) You may want to baste the layers together around all the marked buttonholes if you're working on something big and the layers are shifty and slippery. I'm not basting here because this is just a pants placket.

Do a little running stitch (or perhaps a running backstitch) in fine thread around the line at the width you want the finished buttonhole to be. This holds the layers of fabric together and acts as a nice little guide for when you do the buttonhole stitches.

Cut along the marked line using a buttonhole cutter, or a woodworking chisel. Glossy magazines are the best surface to put underneath your work as you push down, and you can give it a little tap with a rubber mallet if it's not going through all the way.

I'm aware that there are some people who cut their buttonholes open using seam rippers, and if any of them are reading this please know that that is abhorrent behaviour and I need you to stop it immediately. Stop it.

Go get a buttonhole cutter for 10 bucks and your life will be better for it. Or go to the nearest hardware store and get a little woodworking chisel. This includes machine buttonholes, use the buttonhole cutter on them too. If you continue to cut open buttonholes with a seam ripper after reading this you are personally responsible for at least 3 of the grey hairs on my head.

Do a whipstitch around the cut edges, to help prevent fraying while you work and to keep all those threads out of the way. (For my everyday shirts I usually do a machine buttonhole instead of this step, and then just hand stitch over it, because it's a bit faster and a lot sturdier on the thin fabrics.)

I like to mark out my button locations at this point, because I can mark them through the holes without the buttonhole stitches getting in the way.

For the actual buttonhole stitches it's really nice if you have silk buttonhole twist, but I usually use those little balls of DMC cotton pearl/perle because it's cheap and a good weight. NOT stranded embroidery floss, no separate strands! It's got to be one smooth twisted thing!

Here's a comparison pic between silk buttonhole twist (left) and cotton pearl (right). Both can make nice looking buttonholes, but the silk is a bit nicer to work with and the knots line up more smoothly.

I've actually only used the silk for one garment ever, but am going to try to do it more often on my nicer things. I find the cotton holds up well enough to daily wear though, despite being not ideal. The buttonholes are never the first part of my garments to wear out.

I cut a piece of about one arm's length more or less, depending on the size of buttonhole. For any hole longer than about 4cm I use 2 threads, one to do each side, because the end gets very frayed and scruffy by the time you've put it through the fabric that many times.

I wax about 2cm of the tip (Not the entire thread. I wax the outlining/overcasting thread but not the buttonhole thread itself.) to make it stick in the fabric better when I start off the thread. I don't tend to tie it, I just do a couple of stabstitches or backstitches and it holds well. (I'm generally very thorough with tying off my threads when it comes to hand sewing, but a buttonhole is basically a long row of knots, so it's pretty sturdy.)

Put the needle through underneath, with the tip coming up right along that little outline you sewed earlier. And I personally like to take the ends that are already in my hand and wrap them around the tip of the needle like so, but a lot of people loop the other end up around the other way, so here's a link to a buttonhole video with that method. Try both and see which one you prefer, the resulting knot is the same either way.

Sometimes I can pull the thread from the end near the needle and have the stitch look nice, but often I grab it closer to the base and give it a little wiggle to nestle it into place. This is more necessary with the cotton than it is with the silk.

The knot should be on top of the cut edge of the fabric, not in front of it.

You can put your stitches further apart than I do if you want, they'll still work if they've got little gaps in between them.

Keep going up that edge and when you get to the end you can either flip immediately to the other side and start back down again, or you can do a bar tack. (You can also fan out the stitches around the end if you want, but I don't like to anymore because I think the rectangular ends look nicer.)

Here's a bar tack vs. no bar tack sample. They just make it look more sharp, and they reinforce the ends.

For a bar tack do a few long stitches across the entire end.

And then do buttonhole stitches on top of those long stitches. I also like to snag a tiny bit of the fabric underneath.

Then stick the needle down into the fabric right where you ended that last stitch on the corner of the bar tack, so you don't pull that corner out of shape, and then just go back to making buttonhole stitches down the other side.

Then do the second bar tack once you get back to the end.

To finish off my thread I make it sticky with a bit more beeswax, waxing it as close to the fabric as I can get, and then bring it through to the back and pull it underneath the stitches down one side and trim it off.

In my experience it stays put perfectly well this way without tying it off.

Voila! An beautiful buttonholes!

If you want keyhole ones you can clip or punch a little rounded bit at one end of the cut and fan your stitches out around that and only do the bar tack at one end, like I did on my 1830's dressing gown.

(I won't do that style in my video though, because they're not 18th century.)

Do samples before doing them on a garment! Do as many practice ones as you need to, it takes a while for them to get good! Mine did not look this nice 10 years ago.

Your first one will probably look pretty bad, but your hundredth will be much better!

Edit: Video finished!

And here's the blog post, which is mostly a slightly longer version of this post.

[eddiemunsons-missingnipple]

Hey have a request I’d love to see a fic like this:

Dad!Eddie x mom!reader their reaction when their 18 year old daughter comes home with her first real boyfriend turns out it’s a metalhead like Eddie :)

I hope you can do something like this <3

This is so cute, and I love the idea. I just picture Eddie being a complete girl dad. Hope you enjoy. 🩷

Requests are open for the time being.

Dad!Eddie Munson x Mom!reader

Warning: none, just some fluff.

A/n: This is fluff, but I still do not want minors interacting with my work. Not proofread

"He's coming over!" Your daughter Julie raced down the stairs yelling out to you.

Eddie looked up from his phone with his reading glasses hanging off his nose. "Who's coming over? He?"

You saw him looking towards you and then back at your daughter. She just turned eighteen a few months ago. She was born on July tenth. Which was also the birthday of Ronnie James Dio. Something Eddie never stopped bragging about saying it's "the most metalest thing ever."

He fell in love all over again the moment she was born. She was glued to his hip. Anywhere he went, she went. If he was eating, so was she. If Eddie got a tattoo, then he was buying her one out of the bubble gum machine for her to match.

He couldn't stand watching her grow up. Seeing her go from this tiny little thing to a young woman was difficult on you both. She had his eyes and dimples along with his sarcasm.

"Oh, uhh, her boyfriend Eddie, remember he's coming for dinner." You reminded him while trying to keep things calm.

"Boyfriend?" He repeated.

Julie rolled her eyes. " Yeah dad boyfriend you know the guy I've been telling you and mom about for like the last two months."

Eddie didn't say a word back. He knew he couldn't stop her from dating. He actually didn't hate the idea of her dating. He hated the idea of some guy hurting her.

That's all it really came down to. He's tried so hard to shield her from all the bad in the world. But you've helped him realize that's impossible, and he needs to just let her learn.

Once your daughter left for the day, you sat with your husband. You wanted to take his mind off of things and just help him relax. He already possibly has high blood pressure. You didn't want to make it worse.

"You wanna go out back and work on your tomatoes? " You got up and started massaging his shoulders.

He smiled and took off his glasses. "I actually gotta tune up my bike, but maybe tomorrow, sweetheart."

"Are you okay?" You leaned down by his ear.

"I'm fine-- I'll be fine." He reassured you. You turned your head and gave him a little kiss to his cheek.

He was still as handsome as the first time you saw him. His eyes have the prettiest crinkles from all of the years of laughing. His smile lines are visible under his stubble. His hair is starting to finally grey in certain parts. You've been together since you were practically kids.

You and him fell in love the millisecond you laid eyes on each other. Your parents hated him at first. They tried so hard to keep you two apart, but you weren't having it. Nothing was going to keep Eddie away from you.

He tried so hard to win your parents over, mainly your dad. Since your mom softened up when she got to know him better. Your dad was a different story. Your dad didn't like his look.

The tattoos, hair, and music he was strictly against. Eddie was used to being treated like that. He was used to people judging him before they really knew him. That doesn't mean he still didn't try to get your father's approval because he did. All the time, with little to no luck.

You noticed Eddie had been in his garage all day. He said he had to give his bike a quick tune-up, but that usually only takes a few hours. He's been out there since this morning. You look at the clock, and it's now going on 4 pm. Julie has been home now for just an hour or so. She wanted to get ready in time to introduce you to her boyfriend.

You know he's nervous about meeting Julie's boyfriend. He doesn't want to seem like some weird overbearing parent. This is her first serious relationship, it seems like. Eddie wants to be protective, but he doesn't want to scare the guy off. He doesn't want your daughter to hate him.

A loud knocking knocking at the front door tells you he's here. Before you could even leave the kitchen to answer it, Eddie somehow is already there.

He swings open the door and is met with a guy not much taller than him. He has short dark hair with a denim vest similar to his old one. Various pins and patches littered all over it. He was wearing an old Slayer shirt underneath with black boots.

Eddie eyed him curiously. "Whooo are you?"

"Oh, I'm um, Noah...Julie's boyfriend." He held out to his to shake Eddie's. His other hand held some flowers in it.

Foot steps come running up next to them both, and it took Eddie a moment to process who they belonged to.

"Dad, this is Noah." Julie took his hand and brought him inside.

"Right-nice to meet you." He finally shook his hand back as he walked past him.

Eddie was stunned. The second he saw him, he got instant flashbacks of when he was younger going to meet your parents for the first time. He wanted to hate the guy. He wants to be this tough, hard ass to him. But now he can't bring himself to do any of that.

"Eddie, come help me with dinner." You whispered.

"Yeah - Yeah, okay, I'm coming." He shook his head and smiled to himself.

"He bought me flowers." You pointed at the vase holding the bouquet.

"So i buy you flowers all the time." Eddie shrugged, still trying to keep up the facade that he doesn't like the guy.

He grabbed a knife and helped cut up some onions. He looked out the window in front of him and watched your daughter and her boyfriend outside. You stopped what you were doing to focus on them, too. You saw how Eddie's eyes had softened when Noah put a little buttercup flower behind her ear.

You and him instantly had memories flooding in from your earlier years as a couple. Where Eddie would find a pretty flower and put it behind your ear. Or how he would lay with you for hours looking up at the stars. You could see he was getting a little emotional about it. More memories of picnics together in the back of his van.

"You gonna cut those onions or keep zoning out?" You nudged him.

"Sorry, I'm ju- I'm just thinking." He spoke quietly.

You went over to him and rubbed his back. "About?"

"I'm supposed to be a dick head to him, but I can't bring myself to be that way" Eddie kept looking out the window, watching Noah with your daughter.

"Who said you had to be that way?" You looked out to where he was.

He shook his head. "No one... I'm just being over dramatic like usual."

After dinner was over. Noah and Julie were sitting on the couch together while Eddie was sitting in his chair. You were busy getting dessert ready for everyone.

"Hey dad, did I tell you Noah is in a band." Julie giggled.

Eddies face lit up. "No, you didn't. do you play?"

"Uhh, well, I used to drum, but now I sing." Noah informed him. He acted a little shy to even have it brought up so suddenly. He felt put on the spot.

He nods "I used to be in a band too."

"Really?" Noah moved a little closer towards Eddie leaving Julie behind at the other end of the couch.

"Yep, I used to play guitar and sing, actually." Eddie smiled and looked proud to be talking about his former band days again.

"I have some old stuff in my garage where my band "toured" for a bit and my old gear." He pointed behind him.

"Can we check it out?" Noah looked like a kid in a candy store when Eddie mentioned his old gear.

"Follow me," He grunted while getting out of his chair. His knees popped as he stood up. Years of hard work finally taking its toll on his body.

Julie just sat there watching her boyfriend and her dad, leaving her all alone in the living room. You were busy in the kitchen cutting cake and putting the pieces onto plates.

"Guys, dessert is ready!" You jogged to the living room to find it empty except for your daughter.

She rolled her eyes "they're in the garage."

You couldn't help but chuckle.

All day, you had anticipated this first meeting to be a disaster. Now you have your husband and your daughters boyfriend playing guitar together. You know Eddie didn't have a mean bone in his body. Even at his cruelest, he was still considered nice to most.

"Think dad likes him?" Julie crossed her arms, looking annoyed. She was being sarcastic. You could tell by her tone.

You pressed your lips into a thin line, trying hard not to laugh. "He hates him, I'm sure."

You could hear them both screeching from out back. Heavy metal loudly playing, and Eddie's old guitar plugged in. You and your daughter sat eating dessert, trying to drown out all the music. The night ended with Noah being invited back over next weekend. While Eddie was upstairs putting ice on his now sore neck. He forgot his age for a few hours and became that young twenty something man again.

[starkassembled]

man, nothing is as nice as completing another series :D

[lunarluvbot]

saturday sun

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

pairing : percy jackson x fem!reader

summary : a little surprise percy springs on you turns out to be one of the best afternoons at camp. or maybe that's just because you're with him?

requested : yes / no

willow's whispers : first pjo writing cause everything i see is for luke so if you want something done right you gotta do it yourself !! also im pretty sure this can be read for any godly parent. based on the song saturday sun by vance joy. I WROTE THIS IN ONE SITTING SO YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO JUDGE HOW BAD OR SHORT IT IS. I'm building up for my big fics.

warnings : literally nothing this is the most boring fic ever

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"Where are we going?" You laughed, blindly following Percy as he helped you over a fallen log.

"Oh, just somewhere you'll love," He said, and winked. "At least I hope you do. Anyways, c'mon!"

The pair of you marched through the woods of the camp, laughing, talking, teasing, and enjoying moments of silence. The sun blinked lazily between branches of giant pine trees as if Apollo was comfortably stretching out on his throne.

"Here, stop here." Percy turned to you and gave you that smile that made you fall in love a little more every time you saw it. If that was even possible. "There's a pathway over here, be careful 'cause there's a lotta rocks over here."

You followed him once again, down a narrow sloping hill and arrived on a shoreline. A small oasis even. It looked like it hadn't been touched in years, moss grew over everything, the grass was bright and stood tall as if no one's footsteps had ever crushed them down yet. Waves gently lapped the rocks and few shells scattered across the ground.

"Wow," You breathed, almost as if your normal volume would disturb this angelic peace. "When did you find this, Perce?"

Percy, who was flattening the weeds to sit on, looked up. "Huh? Oh, two days ago. During capture the flag. Then I came back yesterday to make sure some monster didn't live here and now I'm showing it to you," He finished setting up his bed that would make any Demeter kid cringe. "C'mere," Percy motioned for you to lay next to him.

You smiled and made your way over to him, easing yourself down on his patch of grass. The two of you were on your stomachs, watching the water swirl into memorizing, glittering, patterns. A sweet silence filled the air.

But the water wasn't what Percy was interested in. He just kept his eyes on you, admiring the way your face lit up when you heard your favorite bird call. The way your eyes seemed to shine in the golden god's light. The smooth curve of your lips that twitched when you smiled.

You met his eyes, the sea-green hue a painting of where the sky and the sea meet.

"Do I have something on my face?" You asked, lightly teasing him to pretend you weren't about to do the same staring as he was doing now.

Percy's eyes glinted and the wisps of his hair caught the sunlight perfectly. "No, you're just the prettiest girl I've ever seen. Art's gotta be appreciated right?"

"I guess but shouldn't I be asking you that?"

"Aw hey, quit stealing my line!" He said, poking your stomach. A giggle escaped you, one Percy knew he would fight any number of monsters to hear again.

"It's not your line! Where's your copyright claim?"

Instead of answering right away, Percy wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you close. He tucked a fly-away strand of hair out of your face and pressed his lips gently to yours. It felt like the first breath of spring, when the flowers peek from their earthly shield and remind the world that only precious things take time.

"It's right here."

And he kisses you again.

[3lli3l0v3r]

idk if you're making requests but I've been dreaming for days with reader who is 8 months pregnant, going out with wife!Abby, whether it's buying clothes or baby things, going to the grocery store or buying something that the reader really wants to eat

READ THIS FIRST! 🇵🇸 my masterlist here.

☆: aw this is cute. here's a super quick lil fluffy drabble for ya, don't mind the hastily edited header, picsart is too much fun. (gotta make the aesthetic cute to distract from lazy writing-) this could also technically be combined with another fluffy request i got involving abby spoiling reader, they kind of go hand in hand i suppose.

♧: 1.4k words

◇: lmk if there r any warnings to be added, this is just tooth-achingly fluffy <3

The sweet, buttery aroma of pancakes wafted through the air, penetrating your deep sleep and making you stir in bed, awakening you fully once you feel the feather-filled mattress sink with weight and a gentle caress on your face.

Turning onto your side with some difficulty and a grunt of effort, you rubbed your eyes and opened them, blinked away the bleariness, and were greeted with the most wonderful sight.

Your wife Abby was sitting at the edge of the bed gazing at you lovingly, pure care and affection in her soft blue eyes. She was smiling warmly, tracing circles on the side of your thigh with one hand, while the other was holding a heaping plate of breakfast she'd specially made just for you.

“Mornin’ beautiful, slept well?”

The timbre of her voice enveloping you like a comforting blanket, her love for you just radiating off her. Even though the two of you had been together for many, many years, there never was a dip in your relationship, no moments of distrust or doubt, just a companionship people spoke about only in fairy tales.

You winced as you sat up, the discomfort in your joints plaguing you, how were you supposed to endure this for a whole month more? 

“I slept alright Abs, had some wild dreams though, and this little peanut had a field day fighting in a boxing match with my ribs, it seems.” You jest, feeling around your aching rib cage. At your joke and slightly sarcastic demeanor, Abby threw her head back and let out a throaty laugh, it was music to your ears. She sets the plate on the bedside table, then shifts closer to you to press a kiss to your belly. 

The blonde cups her hands around her mouth and whispers something against you, you tousle her long and silky hair, stroking the braid.

“Hey, what are you saying?” “Just telling our little peanut they’ve gotta treat their mom well, and I can't wait to meet them.” 

Abby stands up to let you get ready for the day, but of course not before cradling your cheeks and kissing your forehead with an audible mwah, “I made your favorite. Eat up, I’ve got a day planned for us today.” She shoots you a cheeky wink, and leaves briskly before you have a chance to ask her about it. A day out with her would be lovely, you think. You weren't worried about bothering her in any way or anything like that, Abby was always so patient with you whatever it may be, whether it be doing up your shoelaces when you can't reach, preparing everything so you don't have to do so much as lift a finger, and drawing you relaxing baths to ease soreness. Anything you could ever need, she was there, and that fact made you emotional sometimes. 

You picked out an outfit to wear, something both fashionable and comfortable, and made your way to where Abby was waiting for you, feeling quite happy. Her grin could light up the whole universe, beaming as if she'd won the lottery. And in a sense, she had. 

She wrapped you in a homely bear hug, swaying side to side and rubbing your back. “You look amazing. Ready to go?” You feel your cheeks warm and nod, the honeymoon phase never left, did it.

“Where are we going?” You can't help but ask, the curiosity is too much. Abby makes a face and hesitates, before sighting and giving in. “I’m just taking us on a little day out, maybe shop around the mall for a bit, look at some clothes and stuff, see if there's anything new for us?” 

Your heart fluttered, you couldn't wait to spend the day with her. Even though lots of activity was strenuous, your wife made sure to promise you could take it as slow as possible, take as many breaks as you needed, and go home whenever necessary.

The shopping center was a flurry of stimuli, sights and sounds of all kinds, the place was buzzing with activity. Teenagers on their first dates sitting in the photo booths, small children chasing each other around, just humans being humans.

While the two of you walked around at a leisurely pace, Abby kept a firm hold of your hand, never letting go. And while it wasn't like you were going to go anywhere without her, she required your presence as close as possible, at all times. 

While chatting and perusing the area, a particular store caught your eye. You stopped dead in your tracks, causing your wife to jerk back at the sudden stop she wasn't expecting. “You okay?” She asked oh so sweetly, while you beheld the peculiar store. It was a new one you've never seen before, the windows piled high with stuffed animals, mannequins holding their baby “‘quins” and posing, fairy lights twinkling around each sharp angle.

You wordlessly began walking towards it, tugging Abby behind you as she followed, you were being called towards this store by an unseen, supernatural force. Maybe the little one in your belly had spotted it, and was sending signals for you to buy something for them there, who knows.

Stepping foot inside almost made you tear up, it was all so cute and perfect for your little family, just about anything you'd ever need. Every possible product ever invented for babies and toddlers, and it was new too. Appeared just when the two of you could use a place like it, the work of some divine timing perhaps. You heard an amazed gasp from Abby behind you, “Wow, this place has got everything, let's try not to break the bank too much, ‘kay?” 

And so you picked out a few comfy blankets, some with a pastel floral pattern, some fluffy ones which reminded you of marshmallows, and a huge stuffed bear. Half for the baby, and half for yourself, the nursery could always use some more decor, you thought.

The time spent with Abby in the shopping center was eventually making you grow weary, and when the two of you were standing in line to pay, you leaned against your wife for support, absorbing her energy.

She put a strong hand on the small of your back, and murmured to you, “We’re almost out, gonna be home before you know it.” Her voice was low and reassuring, and made you feel at ease, you couldn't wait to get back and rest with her from this outing. Relax a bit, pick a movie, and cuddle the rest of the day away in peace. 

Within no time at all she was done paying, and you stood beside her, observing her interactions. There was something so attractive about her when she was doing just some mundane tasks, you couldn't exactly place your finger on it, but you could spend hours upon hours just admiring her. Was it the way she kept her voice polite but stern, or maybe because you were the only one to see all the softness she possessed that no one else saw.

On the way out you held onto her arm at the bend of her elbow as she was carrying the heaping bags of stuff, and walked in sync alongside her. It was nothing for her, and even if it was, Abby frequently tells you how she’d move mountains for you. You were the luckiest.

You sighed heavily, the tiredness growing with every step. “Can't wait to get back, but thank you for taking us out for a bit, Abs, I had the best time.” “Aww it was nothing. And I can't wait for the little cookie to get here, we’re gonna be the cutest little unit, us three. I love you so much, more than you'll ever know.” She beamed at you, her voice as sweet as honey.

And so the outing is completed, the two of you maybe a little poorer in monetary value, but richer in love, which was only going to increase with every passing day, and you couldn't wait for everything the future had in store for the two, soon to be three, of you. More outings, trips, family movie nights, you always thanked divine forces for blessing you with such a life, it was all you've ever envisioned and more. 

y'all ^^^

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Imagines: The Best of My Love

————————————————————————-

Summary: A sweet Valentine's Day surprise trip from your boyfriend Joe turns into one of the most important days of your life.

(Part one to - Part 2)

Warnings: pure sickening fluff

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

————————————————————————-

February 13th, 2024

(y/n’s pov)

Waking up on the day before Valentine’s Day alone in bed is never fun, especially when it's just 4 days after Joe and I’s 7th anniversary as a couple. The reason the day before was special was that Joe and I were celebrating today, Joe said he was super busy tomorrow with foundation stuff and we needed to celebrate today.

Joe had already told me last night that he was still going to work out this morning but instead would opt for our home gym. Still, the last thing I'd want to do is bother him.

Spending the alone time wisely, I didn't stay in bed too long and took a relaxing shower. Afterward, I did my normal skincare routine and put some light makeup on.

Once that was finished the next step was slicking my hair back into a tight bun and getting dressed.

As of right now, Joe and I don't have plans to leave the house so I put some leggings on and grabbed my favorite one of Joe’s sweatshirts, and put it on.

It was his pink Nike sweatshirt that was my favorite one ever since I hugged him when he wore it for the first time. It was so soft so I've been stealing it out of his laundry since.

After brushing my teeth and making the bed, I went downstairs to make breakfast.

To my surprise, when I walked into the kitchen there was already a whole spread of breakfast foods on a longboard charcuterie-style.

My heart warmed as I looked at the collection of baked goods, savories, and different juices.

When I picked up a blueberry muffin there was a white envelope underneath it.

I put it down for a second to quickly pour a glass of pink lemonade.

Picking it up to read the front a smile spread on my lips when it said “Joe” with a little heart.

I quickly opened the envelope and pulled the small note card out.

Happy Valentine's, Baby!

I'm probably still working out as you're reading this (gotta have big muscles to fight off guys that hit on you). But anyway… how'd I know that you were going to get a blueberry muffin out of all that food I put out?? I'll tell ya. It's because I know you like the back of my hand. I'm gonna guess right now that you're going to pick strawberry lemonade out of all of the drinks I put out.

This isn't the first little surprise either, I've got lots of things up my sleeves and in my pockets to make today the best Valentine's Day ever.

The best of my love, Joey

The little note had me smiling from ear to ear and I was so deep in a trance that I didn't hear Joe behind me. I jumped when two strong arms wrapped around my waist from behind but the familiar laugh coming from behind put me immediately at ease.

“Startle ya?” - Joe

“My gosh, Joe! Yes!” - you

I turned around in his arms and placed my hands on his chest, looking up into his gorgeous blue eyes.

“Did I guess right?” - Joe smiled

Nodding my head in the direction of my muffin and glass of pink lemonade I grinned as Joe’s cheeks deepened a shade of red.

“You know me so well.” - you

“Well, I hope that I know you a little bit after seven years together.” - Joe laughed

“Seven years is a long time…” - you

“It is, isn't it? Does it ever surprise you that we have lasted this long?” - Joe

“Oh gosh no. You're my best friend, can't live without you. Does it ever surprise you?” - you

“No. The rest of my life is with you.” - Joe grinned

I jokingly scoffed and Joe’s face turned to confusion.

“Not officially, last time I checked my left hand was empty.” - you held your bare left hand in front of his face

Joe’s lips formed a straight line as he glared at me. His facial expression made me giggle before I leaned in to kiss is soft lips.

“I’m kidding, Joe. You know I seriously don't care if and when it happens.” - you

“If?! What do you mean if it happens?! It's sure as hell going to happen, I don't care if it's the last thing I do. Who knows, it might be happening sooner than you think.” - Joe

“You said that last Valentine’s.” - you laughed

“Oh, whatever. I have to go shower but expect another surprise in a few minutes.” - Joe

“Ok…” - you

Joe kissed my cheek and unwrapped his arms from me. I couldn't help but watch him walk away because of how borderline delicious he looked wearing his cut-off Nike top with shorts.

Just as Joe was out of my sight the doorbell rang. Woah he wasn't joking, I thought.

I immediately walked to the door and thanked the delivery man after he handed me the substantial bouquet of beautiful red roses.

There was a vase that was my go-to for when Joe got me flowers but after a quick analysis, I came to the realization that there was no way they would all fit.

After placing them on the counter I was examining the huge arrangement when I realized there was yet again another small white envelope.

What it said was short but so sweet, making my heart swell even more.

For our one-month anniversary a few weeks short of seven years ago, I gave you a singular red rose. Here’s eighty-four roses for every month you've been my girl.

The best of my love, Joe

He must be in a sentimental nostalgic mood this Valentine's because though Joe is secretly a raging romantic, I've never seen him go to such great lengths as this.

When I went to put the card back in its stand, it fell and I realized there was writing on the back as well.

P.S. Go get my card from my wallet, a new nail set on me. There's a surprise waiting for you there, and maybe a few more afterward…

What is this man up to??

I went upstairs, and grabbed Joe’s card before grabbing my purse, putting shoes on, and heading to my favorite nail salon.

When I arrived the front desk lady offered me a warm smile and I sent one right back.

“Miss y/n! We've been expecting you. Go ahead and head back.” - Lady

“I don't have to pick a color?” - you

“Your boyfriend prepicked a color, nail type, and everything. You're all set!” - Lady

“Oh okay! Thanks!” - you

As soon as I walked over to my go-to station I noticed a familiar face already sitting there.

“Aubrey?!” - you

“Hey girl!” - Aubrey jumped up

Aubrey was my roommate at Ohio State and has been my best friend ever since. She had moved to California after college to pursue her career as a doctor.

“What are you doing in Cincinnati?” - you hugged her

“Mmm, a certain someone invited me down here…” - Aubrey smiled

“Joe?” - you smiled, immediately thinking about Joe’s letter on your roses

“Maybe.” - Aubrey smirked

“What is he up to?! Do you know? He's been acting so… romantic today.” - you laughed

“Hard to tell. I don't know what he's up to, but he has a nail request that he's also paying for so let's get down to business.” - Aubrey

——

A couple of hours later I had nice oval French tips and Aubrey got solid sage green coffin nails.

We went up to the counter and I handed the lady Joe’s card. She smiled up at me and gave me a wink.

“Your boy has taste.” - Lady

“That he does.” - you giggled and looked at your nails

She laughed as she handed me the card back but she held up a finger telling me to wait. I watched the woman reach under the counter to retrieve yet another white envelope.

When she handed it to me I couldn't help but gasp and quickly rip it open to see what was inside. It was a note and read…

Go down to Kroger with Aubs and get your favorite road trip snacks… you'll need it. ;)

I hope you like your nails, I tried my best to explain what I wanted.

The best of my love, Joe.

Aubrey was reading the note along with me over my shoulder and when we were both done we looked at each other with wide eyes.

You didn't know of course, but Aubrey has known Joe’s plan for weeks so she knew this was happening.

“Aubrey what the heck is he doing?! - you

She just shrugged so I thanked the front desk lady and practically sprinted to the car with Aubrey.

“I’m so confused.” - you

“I know just as much as you, let's get to the store to get your snacks though.” - Aubrey

——

I tried to make the Kroger trip as quick as possible because all I wanted was to get back home to Joe and find out what was going on.

Aubrey asked me to drop her off at the hotel she was staying at since she got an Uber to the nail salon.

After dropping her off, I headed straight for home.

“Joe!” - you called out as you made it through the front door

“Upstairs!” - Joe

I practically ran up the stairs and into our bedroom.

When I did, my heart stopped when my eyes scanned the room.

There were probably over 30 heart-shaped balloons that had floated up to the ceiling and multiple huge bags sitting on our made bed.

Joe was standing to the side of the room looking incredibly cute in his usual sweatpants and t-shirt combo while he wore a bashful grin.

“What is all of this?” - you

“Just another step in my master plan of putting this year's Valentine's Day down in history.” - Joe

I walked up to him and immediately pulled him into my embrace, my head on his built chest as we rubbed each other's backs.

“What are you up to Mr?” - you smiled

“You’ll see. Open your gifts!” - Joe grinned

Walking over to sit on the bench in front of the bed, Joe handed me the first gift bag.

We grinned at each other as I pulled the tissue paper out of the bag. It revealed a shoe box that said “UGG” and I immediately gasped.

They were the Tasman’s that I had been wanting for a while. I had briefly mentioned them when another WAG had them on and I complimented them, turns out Joe was paying attention.

“Thank you! They're so cute.” - you

“You’ll be needing them later today, you know something comfy. And speaking of comfy…” - Joe handed you another bag

I removed the tissue paper and a cute sweat set was revealed.

“Pastel orange, Joe?” - you giggled

“Orange looks good on you!” - Joe

“You’ve said that multiple times, honey.” - you

Joe just smiled at me and took the empty bags off the bed to put them in a pile by the door. He also grabbed the UGG box and sweat set to neatly stack them on the bench in front of the bed.

“Why are you waiting? Open your last gifts, baby!” - Joe

“I’m waiting for you Mr. to tell me which one to open!” - you

“This one.” - Joe grabbed a bag and handed it to you

I reached down into the bag and my fingertips brushed against a smaller box. Giving Joe a skeptical look, he returned my look with a sweet smile.

When I finally looked down inside my heart stopped when I noticed the familiar Cartier packaging.

“Joe… what did you do? This was probably so expensive.” - you

“Stop that, I love spending my money to spoil you. You know that. Just open it.” - Joe

His gaze was convincing so I took the box into my hands and flicked the lid off.

They were the most gorgeous earrings I'd ever seen. The White Gold, Diamond LOVE earrings.

“Joe… they're beautiful.” - you

“Yeah? Do you like ‘em? They're the matching earrings to the bracelet I got you for Christmas. I've had ‘em since them but I didn't give them to you at the same time to avoid ��you spend too much on me’ speech.” - Joe

“If you keep it up with the white gold and diamonds Imma be more shiesty than you.” - you giggled

“That’s 100% my plan. Gotta keep my girl iced out.” - Joe grinned

I walked forward and immediately wrapped my arms around my boyfriend.

“I love you so much. Thank you so much for everything.” - you kissed his lips

“Aye not so fast. You've got one more gift.” - Joe

Joe unwrapped one of his arms from my waist and reached into the final gift bag. He pulled out a white envelope and smiled brightly when he handed it to me.

“Saved the best for last.” - Joe

“Better than those earrings?! Did you get me a puppy??” - you

“No! No puppy.” - Joe laughed

I backed away from him to open it and my mouth dropped open when I pulled out two plane tickets.

“Where are we going??” - you

“Read the tickets.” - Joe

My eyes frantically searched the tickets and I slapped Joe’s arm out of pure excitment when the destination of my dream getaway was printed on the sheet of paper.

“Shut up! I’m going to Portofino?!” - you yelled

“You’re going to Portofino, Italy!” - Joe

I practically lept at Joe and wrapped my legs around his waist, my arms around his neck.

“Thank you! Thank you!” - you yelled into his neck

A thought popped into my mind that made my heart sink and I pulled away from Joe’s neck to confirm or deny my disappointing thought.

“Wait… you're going with me, right?” - you

“Yes, baby. I'm going with you.” - Joe laughed

“Yay! My dream vacay with my favorite person ever.” - you smiled

“Are you excited?” - Joe

“Am I excited?! Joe, I'm ecstatic! I've been dreaming about going there since I was in high school. I can't wait to mark this one off my bucket list… especially with you.” - you

“Good. I'm happy to be there with you.” - Joe

——

“Do you have everything packed??” - Joe

“Yup!” - you

I rolled my suitcase out of the closet and into our bedroom where Joe was sitting on the bed waiting.

“I was going to pack everything for you… but I realized I can't pack everything you need, cause I have no idea.” - Joe

Laughing at him as I wheeled the suitcase to him, I quickly came up with a response.

“You can't pack it but you can use those muscles to carry it to the car.” - you winked

Joe grinned as he flexed his arms, I had to hype him up and it never failed to surprise me with how deep the blush went.

He left the room shortly after to take my suitcase down to the car and I did a final walkthrough of the house to make sure all lights were off, we had everything we needed, and nothing was left running.

When I finally got outside the site of Joe headbanging slowly while biting his lip through the front glass of the car made me internally giggle as I rounded the side and plopped in the front passenger seat.

“Do we have to listen to Kid Cudi?” - you

“I thought you liked him?” - Joe

“I do. But we listen to him all of the time.” - you

“Fine. You pick.” - Joe sighed and handed you his phone to play a song on Spotify.

Naturally, I pulled up my go-to playlist and shuffled it. The first song that played was Nat King Cole’s “L-0-V-E”.

I of course was yelling along the lyrics while Joe just shook his head with a playful grin.

“This song is boring.” - Joe

“You think so? It reminds me of us.” - you

“Why? Because it's boring? Are you calling us boring?” - Joe

“No, you goofball. Because it says ‘love was made for me and you’ and I think that it was.” - you

“I think it was too.” - Joe grinned and laced your fingers with his

——

“Was that whole playlist just old love songs? Or are you in a vintage gushy mood?” - Joe

I thought back to the songs that had played previously…

Can’t Take My Eyes off You by Frankie Valli, Everybody Loves Somebody by Dean Martin, Everlasting Love by Natalie Cole…

“Uhm… yes.” - you

“Yes, to which one, baby?” - Joe laughed

“Both!” - you

“Did I put you In a gushy love song mood?” - Joe

“Yeah… maybe you did. You've been so romantic today.” - you

Joe grinned at me while he squeezed my hand and the next time we were at a red light he leaned over to kiss me.

“I have a feeling that every trip we take from here on out isn't going to top this.” - Joe

“I already know they're not! I'm so excited. Thank you so much, Joe.” - you

“You’re so welcome, but just wait till you see what I have planned throughout the trip.” - Joe

“Ok, I still can't believe you planned a whole International trip with your homebody ways, Joseph Lee.” - you

“I didn't do it by myself. I got help from a lot of people. My mom helped, Aubrey, some guys on the team, your parents, and maybe or maybe not the team’s travel advisor.” - Joe

“Baby, that's so sweet.” - you

“It needs to be perfect…” - Joe sighed

“I think it will be. Can I ask you something?” - you

“Yup.” - Joe

“Why’d you get my nails done?” - you

“Uhm… because we're probably going to take pictures and you had said multiple times your old set was busted. Thought you might want to get new ones.” - Joe

I reached over and put my hand on Joe’s arm, lightly scratching his skin with my nails while I smiled brightly at him.

“I love you.” - you

“I love you too, babe.” - Joe

——

We arrived at the airport and to my confusion someone was there to escort us. The tall male with a bodyguard build led us through an area adjacent from the regular airport and before I knew it Joe and I were standing in front of a jet.

“What did you do?!” - you

“Wanna fly in a private jet?” - Joe grinned

After we handed our bags and suitcases to part of the crew, I was standing there astounded so Joe took my hand and guided me up the steps.

“This is incredible… how much did this cost to fly us there?” - you frowned slightly

“My love, money is not something we have to worry about.” - Joe winked with a cocky grin on his lips

I had changed into my sweat set, UGGs, and put my new earrings in before we left the house and I swore sometimes I would catch Joe’s eyes lingering to the substantial diamonds on my ears.

Eventually, we made it inside the jet and it was even nicer inside than it was outside. The lighting was warm and the leather seats were astonishing.

“You like it?” - Joe

“I love it, and I love you.” - you pecked Joe’s cheek

Joe put a hand on the small of my back and gently moved me in the direction of a chair.

After sitting down, Joe took his spot across from me, a table in between us and I propped my feet up on his lap.

He slipped my UGGs off and gently put them on the floor before he started massaging my feet.

It was the little things that Joe did that made me praise him for being the best boyfriend ever, and he never failed to hold himself to that title.

“You comfy?” - Joe

“Very.” - you smiled

“We have a long ride ahead of us so hopefully we can take a nap at some point.” - Joe

I nodded and the flight attendant walked over to us to explain a few things. Due to the fact Joe is an avid hater of PDA I was expecting Joe to drop my foot when she walked over, but he didn't. He listened to her intently as he continued rubbing small comforting circles on my foot.

Joe had a few questions about the lunch and dinner menu but eventually, she walked away.

“You have absolutely spoiled me today, I don't know how it can get much better.” - you

“Just you wait.” - Joe winked

——

February 14th, 2024 - *Actual* Valentine's Day

When we finally arrived in Portofino it was early morning the next day, Joe and I were pretty exhausted.

Despite being jet-lagged and tired, the drive to the Airbnb was absolutely beautiful.

The different colored buildings and the water were some of the most breathtaking sites I'd ever laid eyes on. I had to look back at Joe who was sitting next to me in the back of the car just to verify he could see it too.

“It's beautiful…” - you

“It is, isn't it?” - Joe smiled

He was so in love with you, so obsessed with pleasing you that he’d do anything just to see that twinkle in your eye when you see something you love. When you looked back at him he saw that twinkle and he hoped that it wasn't just coming from the gorgeous surroundings, but also because of him.

You were still looking out of the car window but suddenly he felt a hand on his thigh. When he looked down he saw your fingers making grabby motions and when he laced his fingers with yours, they were at ease. Even with the view in front of you, you still reached for him behind.

The Airbnb was even more breathtaking. Joe, in the most broken Italian accent I'd ever heard, told me it was called the Baia degli Ulivi.

It was a pretty pink color with forest green shutters and a beautiful balcony view.

Joe and I sat our bags down when we got inside because he said he wanted to show me around.

I could tell that Joe was proud of himself for picking such a ravishing place for us to stay.

He was so adorable as he walked around the house and pointed out little things he liked on the Airbnb app when he looked at pictures.

My favorite part was when he was super proud to show me the bathroom because…

“It has a fucking bidet!” - Joe pointed

He was looking equal parts intrigued and proud but I couldn't help but bust out laughing at his exclamation.

“There’s my goofy boy. You've been so romantic the past two days that I've kinda missed the goober side of you.” - you

“Trust me, it’s never gone sometimes it just gets overpowered by another side of me.” - Joe grinned

“C’mon Joey, let’s go take a nap.” - you

——

A few hours later, meaning like six, we woke up at one o'clock and decided to venture out of the house.

Joe had an itinerary on his phone that he pulled up while we were still lying in bed cuddling.

“Wanna go to a castle?” - Joe

“A Castle?! Yes!” - you

“Okay, we can get dressed and go to the Castello Brown before we head to lunch.” - Joe

“Is that the name of it?” - you

“Mhm.” - Joe nodded

“I can't believe I'm here with you right now. This is my dream come true, Joe. Thank you for everything, you're the best boyfriend a girl could ask for.” - you

“I love you.” - Joe kissed your forehead

——

Soon we were walking through the castle grounds hand in hand.

There was this one particular painting that I walked away from Joe to take a picture of, and when I turned around I was met with the sight of Joe holding his phone up taking a picture of me. He never fails to make me feel like the most loved woman on that planet.

We continued walking to the top where there was a beautiful view of the water. Our hands were laced together as I laid my head on Joe’s shoulder, and he laid his against mine.

The moment was amazing, everything just felt so surreal and magical. After everything Joe went through with football last season and all of the obstacles we've faced, it felt like they all disappeared.

I was so focused on Joe and the view that I flinched when there was a tap on my shoulder. When I turned around it was an older woman and what seemed to be her husband standing next to her.

“Sorry to bother but you two are just so adorable and remind me of my husband and I when we were young. I took a nice picture of you guys, do you want it?” - Lady

She showed Joe and me the picture and we both looked at each other with a large grin. You could see the love radiating off of us.

“Yes! Here I'll give you my number. I'm y/n and this is my boyfriend Joe.” - you smiled

“I’m Linda and this is my husband Ben. How long have you guys been together?” - Linda

“Seven years.” - you answered

“Wow, that's a long time! We've been together for 35. We got together as 15-year-olds in high school.” - Linda

“That’s so sweet. What are you guys doing in Italy?” - you

“Revisiting the place we got engaged for Valentine's Day. What about you two young’un’s?” - Linda

“Aww. This is my dream vacation place so Joe surprised me for Valentine’s Day.” - you

“That’s a good man you have.” - Ben nodded

“I know. He's my best friend.” - you grinned at Joe

We talked to Linda and Ben for a little longer before I offered to take a picture of them just like Linda had done with me and Joe.

They agreed and posed with smiles plastered on their faces.

Linda and I exchanged pictures before we parted ways and Joe and I went to lunch.

It was a place that Joe again attempted to pronounce, named Trattoria Tripoli.

“It has 4.5 stars.” - Joe

That boy really did do some research.

While we were sitting and waiting for our food Joe made a little ring out of the straw paper and slid it onto my ring finger. It was a gesture he'd done for a long time almost at every restaurant we go to, but this time it felt different. More butterflies set off in my stomach than normal.

——

We spent the rest of the evening and afternoon at the Airbnb watching movies on the couch since it had been such a long day.

At around seven I told Joe I was getting in the shower and that he was welcome to join me but he passed on the offer and said he wanted to start unpacking instead.

The shower was amazing and the many different settings had me making a mental note to buy a new showerhead for the house.

After stepping out I wrapped a towel around my body and put my hair up in another one before leaving the bathroom to get a comfy outfit.

I was confused when I stepped into the bedroom and Joe wasn't there, his suitcase was still zipped up and hadn't moved spots since we had gotten here.

“Joey?” - you yelled

My eyes scanned the room one more time and paused on the bed.

There was a beautiful dress I couldn't recognize as one from my closet and on top of it was a white envelope.

I immediately grabbed it and ripped it open.

Put this on and meet me on the balcony, the final surprise of the night. (but not of the trip)

The best of my love, Joe.

Asking myself the question I've been asking myself for 48 hours straight once again, what is he up to?

A while later I had the dress slipped on, my hair fixed, and very light makeup on.

There were nervous butterflies in my stomach because I had no idea what Joe was going to do.

I took a final deep breath before I walked out of the bedroom and out to where the balcony doors were in the living room.

When I stepped outside my heart stopped.

The instrumental version of Turning Page started playing (specifically at the time stamp 1:40) and Joe stood at the end of an Isle lined with candles and rose petals. He was wearing a dark grey button-down shirt with dark-washed jeans and dress shoes.

“Joe… what are you doing?” - your eyes filled with tears

“C’mere, baby.” - Joe smiled

I slowly walked to Joe who was nervously rubbing his sweaty palms on the front of his pants.

Joe took my hands in his and took in a deep nervous shaky breath.

“y/n y/l/n, for as long as I can remember I've wished for a princess to be the woman next to me. When I was younger every wish I made on an eyelash, dandelion, shooting star, or birthday candle, was about love. You filled that void. I remember the first time I laid eyes on you back at Ohio State, I was so infatuated with you but I knew there was no way I would be able to get an actual goddess to get out with me.” - Joe

He paused to laugh with me while I wiped my tears until he forged ahead.

“I was so surprised that my embarrassingly awful tries at flirting with you worked. I didn't need tutoring that much by the way, I just really wanted to be with you any chance I got. It seriously didn't matter to me if I was at your dorm studying till two with an eight AM practice the next morning if it meant I was spending time with you. You've been the one consistent thing in my life since then that I know will always be with me through anything. y/n, you're the princess that I've been asking for my whole life. The most gorgeous, humble, kind, selfless princess there ever was. You understand me on a level that no one else is even capable of doing and there isn't a life that I picture for myself without you in it. I'll love you when we're old farts with dentures, stealing kisses at the family get-togethers to freak our grandkids out because I know the rest of my living is with you. y/n, your love is my turning page.” - Joe

Both Joe and I giggled at his use of a line from the song that was currently playing before he dropped one of my hands to help wipe the steady flow of tears falling from my eyes.

“That being said…” - Joe

Joe paused and let go of my hands. My crying only got harder when he dropped down onto one knee and pulled the light blue Tiffany box out of his pocket. He flicked the box open and the gorgeous diamond ring only made me cry harder.

“Will you marry me?” - Joe looked up hopefully into your eyes

My hands covered my face for a second just because of how surreal this moment was.

“Yes! Of course, I'll marry you, Joe.” - your cried

Joe lept up and immediately wrapped his arms around me.

I wrapped my arms around him as he picked me up and spun me around.

When Joe finally sat me down he slipped the ring onto my finger and grabbed the back of my neck to kiss me.

Out of all the kisses we've had over seven years, this one was my favorite.

“I love you so much.” - Joe hugged you tight

“I love you too.” - you

——

We were both back in bed now that things had died down, but we were both bubbling with excitement.

“You’re my fiance.” - you smiled at Joe

“We’re getting married.” - Joe grinned

“You say that like you didn't think we ever would.” - You

“No, I knew we would. It's just official now. I'm so glad I finally did it.” - Joe

“Me too, baby. Me too.” - you smiled

I cuddled into Joe’s chest more and found myself nuzzled into his neck.

“Do you like the ring?” - Joe

“I love the ring. It's like exactly what I had pictured. You're really good at picking things out for me, Joe.” - you

“I have never put so much thought into anything else in my entire life. It took me weeks to find the one I wanted to get for you because it had to be perfect.” - Joe

“You seriously did an amazing job. We need to talk about some things though.” - you

“Like what?” - Joe

“When and how we're going to tell people, if we're going to make it public…” - you

“Shhh. We can worry about that when we're in Ohio. Right now I just want to be with my gorgeous fiance, eat dinner, and go to pound town later.” - Joe

I giggled and wrapped myself around Joe, grateful to have such an amazing man in my life who would soon be my husband.

————————————————————————-

Author’s note: on the ninth day of Christmas I gave you all the fluffiest fic ever. (part two with smut is coming guys don't worry)

Request for this fic;

[twirlingsmilingwriting]

Tolerate It pt. 3 || Young! Coriolanus Snow X reader

"Took this dagger in me and removed it, gained the weight of you then lose it... If its all in my head tell me now. Tell me I've got it wrong somehow, I know my love should be celebrated but you tolerate it"

You don't need to read pt 1 to understand what is happening but if you want to ITS HERE

Part two is a little necessary but you'll prob catch on. Part two HERE

TLDR: Truly feeling like the luckiest person alive when your former classmate and short-term boyfriend asked you to marry him. Not even a year into the marriage and also a year into his presidency does the original love and admiration you felt for him start to dissipate. You can't help but feel trapped and tricked into a marriage in which he may have never loved you to begin with.

Warnings: Angst, Love-Bombing, marriage, gender ambiguous reader, typical snow tags (manipulation), alcohol, alluding to sexual acts but not described, kissing, unclear motives, crying, death, the reader being so delulu and manipulated omg, slight classism, self unaliving, blood

WORD COUNT: 7k

A/N: This is a dialogue-heavy one. Lots of yappin today y'all. Also a LOT and I mean a LOT darker than the others. I POSTED THIS LAST NIGHT BUT FORGOT TO PUT ANY TAGS SO I GOTTA REPOST IT

~

The morning light peered through the curtains of our bedroom ever so slightly, just enough that I could feel the warmth on my nose. I scrunched my face and squirmed under the covers. It wasn't until I felt the weight of his body move from beside me and get out of bed, that I reached my arm out for Coriolanus just to be greeted with nothing. I fluttered my eyes open and looked over. I watched intently while he threw on some clothes. God, he was gorgeous. Strikingly blond curls bouncing while he moved, his toned body with broad shoulders, a thin waist, those blue eyes and sharp jaw, he was so stunning. I love my husband so much. I whispered a quick 'good morning' to him and all he could do was hum in response. I sat up in the bed and used the sheet to cover myself up.

"Where are you going, Darling?"

"I have some business to attend to. You wouldn't understand, my beautiful empty head."

Aww. He called me beautiful. He gave me a quick glance before heading out and slamming the door behind him. I got out of bed and scoured the room for something decent to put on. Clothes from the night before had been scattered and I knew I'd have to add laundry to today's agenda. I picked up a white silk shirt from atop the dress and I threw the shirt over my head, I let out a soft sigh, looking over at myself in the tall gold mirror taking note of the smudged makeup and eyeliner that had dried in blackened streaks down my face from last night's tears. Tiny hickies decorated my neck and collarbones and I couldn't stop the smile that spread on my face from the joy I felt from Coriolanus claiming me as his. Gratitude is the best way I can describe the feeling. I am married to the most powerful man in Panem. What could I have done to deserve this?

Our relationship got rocky sometimes, yes, but he was just busy. I can't help but blame myself for how he was treating me after we got married. To be fair, he did just become president. I can't even imagine how stressful that must've been for him. It made sense why it felt like he had no time for me. Last night he admitted he never even knew I felt so neglected, it must've been my fault. Clearly, he loves me right?

Last night, I felt so loved, the way he kissed me and wrapped his arms around me, his aroma filled my senses. He loves me so much, if he didn't he wouldn't be showing me off to a whole nation of people right?

I kept asking myself for reassurance, but I had my answer, no one just marries someone they don't love.

Right?

Of course, he does. I remember when it started, it was real, so real. He's just been so tired these past few months. He has his reasons and I should understand that I can't be so selfish to be in his life taking up too much space and time. I am lucky for the sentences I will get in the story of a monumental man. Looking in the mirror of the vanity, I took a deep breath and smiled in contentment. My eyes continued to scan the display. The vanity was a white desk and drawer set with a large and extravagant mirror outlined with gold. I had hand-painted vines of ivy on the wood. The desk had makeup and my rose-scented perfume. Honestly, I always preferred fruity and sweet scents but Coryo loves it more when I smell like roses. My fingers tapped the delicate glass bottle before I placed it back down and walked to the window to look over the garden where we had the party last night.

Tables were still set up and cups littered the lawn. I giggled a little bit, remembering the fun people were having dancing around the area without a care in the world. There was always a certain type of peace that came after parties when everyone left. Similar to nostalgia where it's that strong sense of bliss but also a certain emptiness that comes from the drop from high emotions and energy to nothingness. Still, the memories of the fun of last night came back to me. A few men dressed in white peacekeeper uniforms started to file into the area and I cocked an eyebrow up in confusion. They must be coming to clean up the trash. My eyes followed them.

That's when I saw it.

The body of a tall man with ginger hair lay lifeless on his back on the stone pathway of the garden. It was the same man that I had talked with last night, Curtis. His eyes were rolled back into his head and speckles of blood could be seen on the corners of his mouth. A cup was held loosely in his hand. I gasped and my jaw hung low in shock. How could this have happened? Did he choke on something? Got into a fight? The peacekeepers started to harshly pick up his body and filed him out. Did Coryo know about this? The blood quickly left my face and I felt a sinking sense of doom in my stomach.

I had only known the man for a moment, but I felt like he was a good man. He didn't deserve whatever happened to him. The peacekeepers left the area and then moments later the maids came in to clean. Tears started to prick the corner of my eyes before I gulped heavily. Maybe he just drank too much last night. The red was just dried wine...

Yes

Yes

That made sense right...?

I had to think of something to ease my mind. Maybe I could ask Coryo about it later. More and more maids filed into the area, their black uniforms making the whole scene previously seem more grim. Red started appearing in my teary-eyed peripheral vision and I quickly shut the curtains. My chest heaved up and down as I struggled to catch my breath. I had to collect myself. I probably didn't understand the situation fully, Coriolanus knows what's going on, he always does. I won't worry about it until he comes home. I walked over the desk and wrote little notes for him on a few pieces of paper, scattering them around the bedroom. Then, I went to take a shower. I was going to have lunch with my mother today, I had to get ready.

~

The doorbell rang and I walked over to answer it. Instantly, my mother had wrapped her arms around me bringing me into a warm hug.

"Y/N! Sweetheart I missed you so much it's been so long," she spoke softly and I couldn't help the childish smile that dragged across my face.

"I haven't seen you since the wedding mom I missed you too," she loosened her grip on me and walked into the house.

"Wow... you truly are living in a life of luxury now sweetie look at this place... I see you put your little artistic flair on things haha," she joked and awed at the size of the house.

"Oh, the little paintings? I didn't think other people would notice them haha, after I dust I like to add the little things and details around. I've been hoping Coryo would notice but he's just a man, and he's so busy and tired all the time I can't blame him for not noticing. You should look at the plates when we eat today! I've been trying to add things to the table wear, which makes eating a lot more fun."

She continued to look around and I watched intently while her eyes followed the small roses, vines, clouds, and butterflies I had painted on the pillars and edges of the house. She then brought her attention back to me and pressed her lips into a thin smile, a glint of sadness was painted into her stormy eyes.

"Sweetheart, you look so thin, are you eating well? He doesn't have you on some crazy diet does he? With the amount of money you guys have I feel like you should be eating three-course meals for every meal..."

"Mom please~ I'm an adult, don't worry about me so much."

"That doesn't answer my question."

"Come on let's go sit down at the table, foods' almost ready." I interlocked my arm with hers and started to guide her to the dining room. We sat facing each other. The chefs cooking could be heard faintly.

"How is the married life treating you?"

"Um... Well honestly mom, it's been rough. I felt like the original spark of our relationship had been extinguished the moment he put this ring on my finger, he had grown very cold and I swear there were days that went by where he didn't even look at me but last night we talked it out. He didn't even know I felt like that so I can't be mad at him"

"Sweetheart, I've been here for about 10 minutes and I can't help but continue to pick up these little details that are showing he isn't treating you the way you deserve. You are smarter than this Y/N I raised a strong fighting spirit, you survived a war with us and never let that darkness cloud the brightness that is your light but right now honey, you seem sad. I don't think your romantic spark is the only thing he's diminishing sweetheart, he's burning you out." Her hand reached out for mine and we interlocked fingers. She looked deeply into my eyes and I watched as the concern grew in hers.

"No mom it's not like that. He's just busy, you should know how hard he's working. I know my place is to sit and listen to him, he's so much wiser than I am. He's a great man and he loves me," I started to get a little defensive but tried to hold my temper. Her lips pursed and she gave my hand another squeeze. It was then the chefs came out and placed our plates in front of us. We sat in silence for a moment while we started to eat.

"You're stubborn I know. The more we tell you to run from him the further it pushes you away from us and closer to him. You should be celebrated, you do so much for this man and he gives you nothing. This... this just doesn't seem healthy."

"Mom. I'm fine. I'm breathing. My health is fine"

"But your soul isn't."

Her words spit venom into me and I froze in place and listened. "Truly, what kind of man doesn't let his spouse see their family more than once every few months. I had to beg him to be able to see you today. We all miss you at home. Hell, I miss you."

Shock ran through my body while I spoke. "He told me you never reached out for these past few months." A chuckle left her lips. "Does that man do anything but lie? I shouldn't be surprised... politicians will always say what you want to hear and what benefits them."

"Mom I- can we please talk about something else? I don't appreciate you disrespecting my husband. I shouldn't have ever said anything. This is why he doesn't want you around is you keep disrespecting him. I promise mom everything is okay. Just rocky sometimes and that's mostly my fault."

Her face scrunched up and she looked away to avoid eye contact. She frowned before taking another bite of the food.

"It just hurts to see you like this... I almost feel like I should've stopped it sooner-"

"Mom," I cut her off and slammed my fist on the table slightly. She quickly shut up again before her lips parted.

"How was the party last night?"

"Lovely, the capital parties are always a joy. Coryo even made a toast to me at the end of the night it was so heartwarming." I smiled, happy she changed the subject. I started to gush about how sweet Coryo was last night to try and defend himself from my mother. I don't understand why all of my loved ones just couldn't seem to like him.

"Did he talk to you?" She asked tilting her head up.

"Who?"

"Curtis."

My face went pale and my jaw dropped. Flashbacks to what I had seen that morning rushed into my mind and I sat there horrified. First was the shock then the confusion.

"He's a friend of your older brother. He's been living with us for awhile while his new house gets built. Your brother asked him personally to come to the party last night to try and talk to you. We weren't sure if we were going to be able to see you today so we were trying to find any way to talk to you and make sure you were okay."

"He um... yes I do believe I talked to him. He was very charming, sweet. He reminded me of someone I used to know but we only talked for a little last night..." I was in a daze while I spoke. I didn't want to talk about Coryo's jealous outburst or what I saw that morning.

"That's good to hear. Y/N how was he last night? He didn't come home last night though. Was he drunk when you left? We've been worried sick."

"He... no he seemed very sober though he did have the confidence of a drunk man." I tried to joke to distract from the adrenaline and fear that was pumping through my veins.

"Sweetheart I can tell when you're keeping things from me. Please, darling you can tell me anything, I'm your mother"

I avoid her eye contact like the plague and continued to eat my food, struggling to swallow.

"It's nothing really, I'm just a little tired today that's all. Mom, eat your food please, it's delicious. How's dad?"

Her suspicious mind was reflected in her suspicious eyes. She was not going to let this go so easily. I could see the same grim expression I had on my face from earlier start to spread on hers.

"The first thing I ever heard about your husband was that any person who got too close to him ended up dead, missing or disgraced. I truly hope you don't follow in those same steps."

"Mom, you guys told me that same line over and over again before we got married and it's not even true. Name one person who he's done that to"

She scoffed and spoke quietly.

"Lucy Gray."

I raised an eyebrow at her in confusion.

"Who?"

"I don't believe you watched The Hunger Games this year, you never liked the blood. There truly isn't any way to confirm this now but Coriolanus was in charge of mentoring a girl from District 12 named Lucy Gray. She was a songbird and I remember the first time I watched her sing on television, it was breathtaking. Rumors spread that your husband fell in love with her and planned to run off with her and then one day, she disappears. Not a single trace left but he returned. He returned to the capital and mysteriously got gifted a scholarship and an internship. That is a shady man."

"Respectfully mom I think you're telling folk tales right now. He told me I was his first love, the first one to make him feel so alive so that can't be true. I've never even heard of this girl. Wouldn't my classmates have said something?"

She shrugged. "I wouldn't say anything to upset the man suspected of such crimes." Suddenly, a peacekeeper walked into the dining room and another followed in. Doors slammed around us and one spoke in a booming voice. "By orders of President Snow, we have been assigned to escort you out of here ma'am" They got on either side of my mom and grabbed her arms.

"There must be some sort of mistake here, it's barely 2, he said I could be here till 3! Let me down!"

I stood there frozen and helpless, I had no clue what to do. I yelled at them to wait but they pulled her out of her seat then started to head out. She started kicking and tried to fight back. "Let me say goodbye! I need a hug! I am the mother here, it's my right to see my child! He sent you guys here huh? Can't stand my kid hearing the truth? All this that's happening to me is his fault!"

"Mama! Goodbye! I love you!"

"He did it Y/N! You know he did it! Don't let it happen to you my love! Fight, there must be a way out! You're better than this. I love you!"

She shouted while they escorted her out. Her voice echoed around the room whispering the words 'He did it'. As much as I shook my head I couldn't stop thinking about it. Sickening silence bounced against the walls while my head ran back everything that had just happened. I couldn't help but let warm tears fall from my eyes while I sat back down in my chair. I'm so confused. I just needed my husband right now. A maid walked in and cleaned up the table and I sat in the chair and cried.

~

I laid down in bed, sitting up staring at the ceiling. The bed was as comfortable as sleeping on a cloud but I couldn't sleep, nothing could calm the storm in my head. The door handle turned and I saw Coryo glace into the room. His blue eyes made eye contact with mine as he stepped into the room slowly. He shut the door behind him and started to loosen his tie.

"Darling, you're still up?"

"I can't sleep..." I admitted and watched as his plump lips parted to expel a sigh. He started to change into his pajamas.

"Why dear?" He started to crawl into bed and pulled me into him with his strong arms.

"Can I ask you a question?" I felt his grip on me tighten before he nodded and hummed a soft 'yes' into the air. A sigh left my lungs and I pressed my hand against my temples. Where do I even start?

"Coryo... have you ever killed anyone before?"

"W- what?"

I tipped my head up and looked deep into his blue eyes to search for any form of sincerity. "Please be honest with me... please..."

"Darling what could have ever put these sorts of ideas in your pretty little head?"

"Coryo that's not important now please answer me. I just want your honesty here, if you're honest I will not judge you, I- I'll still love you."

The only emotion I could see on his face was panic. He removed his arm from my body and I started to panic in response. He had just started being nice to me again and I was worried I pushed him away. My big mouth just couldn't stay shut.

"Y/N, of course I haven't. Who do you perceive me as? Some kind of monster? The only person I have ever killed is my past self and he had to die so I could be the man I am today, a man ready to love you the way you deserve."

He was rambling and his lack of eye contact made me feel uneasy. I wanted to believe him, I truly did but with the way he was acting, I couldn't wholeheartedly believe him and that made me feel sick. I should not be this distrustful of my husband. I started to zone off, lost in deep thought when his hand met my jaw and he positioned my head up to look at him. "Y/N you trust me don't you? I've done everything for you, you should trust me darling." He planted a quick kiss on my forehead. "I- I believe you Coryo." He smiled down and then pressed a kiss to my lips. I melted against his touch and placed my hands to cup his face. When we pulled away I still couldn't shake the questions that flooded my head. Remembering what my mother said, I couldn't help myself from the words spilling out of my mouth.

"Coryo... one last question, Who is Lucy Gray?"

His lips parted and his eyes frantically started to search my face. "How did you hear about her?"

"Coryo?"

Anger started to flood his eyes and his jaw clenched. Regret filled every part of my body and I sat up on the bed, keeping my hands on his face. "I'm sorry Coryo, is that a touchy subject I-" He was quiet for a moment as if planning what he was going to say.

"She... she was a nobody girl from District 12. I had to mentor her for The Hunger Games that year for my school project. I came out on top, Snow always lands on top."

He spoke through gritted teeth while he looked into my eyes, scanning my face for a reaction. What he told me so far aligned exactly with what my mom told me. This was even more worrying. There had to be more. He was keeping something from me. He could sense my distrust and started to speak again, more carefully.

"Darling, do you want the full truth?"

"Yes Coryo..."

He let out a heavy sigh. "She was my first girlfriend. We had a short fling and then she cheated on me." My jaw dropped. "Oh Coryo I'm so sorry..." I reached out and pulled him into a tight hug, tangling my fingers in his blond locks of hair. "It's okay darling, you didn't know. You don't know a lot of things." His hands started to rub my back up and down while I held him close.

"I never loved her anyways, I could never love someone so low class and trashy."

In an odd way I felt almost comforted by that statement. It meant he wasn't lying to me, I was his first love, right? He placed his hands on my stomach and pushed me away from the hug. My arms fell back down to my sides and I stared at him with deep remorse in my eyes. He smiled again, "It's okay Darling, is there anything else I can answer for you to put your troubled mind at ease?" Truthfully, I had a lot more questions but I felt bad and I didn't want to push him away more, not when our relationship was so delicate. I shook my head 'no' and he hummed before laying down on the bed. I followed suit and he turned his back to me.

"Goodnight"

"Goodnight..."

"I love you"

And then I was met with silence.

~

The next day passed and it was business as usual but I still couldn't get my mother's voice out of my head. My ears rang with every corner I turned. I saw Coryo's panicked face every time I closed my eyes after I asked him if he had killed anyone. It made me sick to my stomach but I didn't believe him. I do believe my mom was wrong about Lucy Gray though, he was genuinely hurt when I asked about her. I couldn't even imagine anyone wanting to cheat on him. Especially a girl from District 12, the opportunity to be with a capital man, especially one as charming, smart, and talented as Coryo should be a blessing. My poor husband probably had to deal with so much then.

When he came home he didn't talk to me that day. He couldn't even look me in the eye really. I felt wildly embarrassed and guilty. Of course, he was pulling away again, I pushed him. I should've just kept my pretty mouth shut like he had asked. My mom must have been mistaken. They don't know him like I do. It was nice to know how much they cared about me though.

Coriolanus slept in his office that night. I assume he had business to attend to so I just sat and tried to sleep alone in bed.

~

The next morning I woke up late and decided to try and make it up to Coryo by trying to leave more "I love you" notes around the house. I painted a portrait of a lake on one of his mugs, adding rose and ivy details to the handle. Stumbling down the hallway in the afternoon I walked by Coryo's office. I knew I wasn't allowed in there but damn it I was so curious. There were two maids in there talking and I silently eavesdropped.

"Careful when dusting that... This man has a lot of secrets and what's in those vials one I do not want to know about."

The other laughed and they continued to clean up.

"Isn't it odd we decided to have such a liar for a president?"

'Liar?' I thought. Why does everyone seem to think he's a liar?

"Yeah but he's great for the economy and the future of Panem."

Silence filled the room and then they both started laughing again.

"That doesn't seem to make it any better, then again, let's not bite the hand that feeds us."

They started to finish cleaning his office and once they left I snuck in. My hands traced around the walls of his office, it was small and packed with things. On his desk lay a little book filled with names and numbers, a pack of matches, a single white rose, and the vials the maids were talking about. Curiously, I reached for it. It was probably liquor or something. I picked it up carefully and examined it. It was clear and sealed shut. Cautiously, I started to unscrew the top and placed a drop of it on my finger. The liquid burned through my skin and I yelped loudly in pain. I grabbed a napkin and wiped it off my hand. I screamed in pain and the smell of burning flesh filled the room. Hot tears ran down my face as I removed the napkin and saw the damage that it left. My finger was red, hot, and my flesh was melted in the shape of a circle where the drop had been placed. Gasping desperately for breath, I tightly closed the lid of the vile and put it right back where I found it. I continued to cry from the searing pain, my finger throbbed and I whimpered desperately trying to keep quiet. I picked up my trash and made sure I left no trace of myself in there while I rushed to the kitchen, rinsing my finger under the water. Once the burning had gone away I slid down and laid my back against the kitchen cabinet.

"F- fuck fuck fuck- fucking poison. WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE HAVE POISON?"

I started to rock back and forth while I watched the skin around the burn turn purple. This must've been some sort of divine punishment to me for going into his office knowing I wasn't supposed to. One maid heard my wailing and hurried over to help me. She put an ointment on my finger before wrapping it up in a band-aid and above all, she didn't ask a question. I couldn't tell if that meant she was used to this kind of thing or if she was trained not to. I picked myself up off the floor and continued to go about my day and pretend that nothing happened.

Coryo didn't come to bed that night, I wasn't too sure if he had even come home honestly. I fell asleep alone again with nothing but my thoughts.

~

The next morning I was awakened by a rough hand shaking my shoulder. I yawned and opened my eyes to be met with Coryo's blue ones. They were deep and full of concern. He was sitting next to me on the bed still in his work clothes. I felt that pit of grief deep in my stomach again. Something was wrong, greatly wrong. "Coryo?" I asked, trying to remain calm.

"Y/N..."

"Coryo what's the matter?"

He sighed with deep remorse and said the worst news I had ever heard in my life. "Your parents... Y/N... your whole family they... um... their house burned down last night and the firefighters couldn't make it in time. When they arrived there, they searched the house but not a single survivor was found. They did find this though in your mothers room," He handed me a single stuffed doll. The doll was mine from when I was a child, it didn't have a single burn on it. I held it in my hands and sat staring at it in silence. They were gone. My whole family was gone. The tears threatened to spill but I felt so sick of crying lately. Why did my life feel like it was falling apart so fast? I just wanted a happy life as a newly wed and I have gotten nothing remotely close to that.

"Coryo... What's wrong with me? I'm like a bomb, anyone who cares about me either leaves me or dies... Am I cursed? I didn't even get to say goodbye. I didn't even get to hug them or- or- or see how big my little brother got or how smart my older brother is. I- I- I should've seen them more," I started weep, my tears starting to fall onto the doll below me, as if my tear were staining the innocence of the girl I used to be. Coriolanus grabbed me and held me close as I started to cry furiously into his chest. He planted a soft kiss on the top of my head and tried to whisper things to calm me down. His hands rubbed up and down my back.

"Darling, it's okay. You're going to be okay. You have me. I'll be here for you always. I make you happy, right? Your parents were always trying to keep you away from me... they didn't know you like I do. They don't know what you need darling but I do. We are going to get through this together, okay?'

I could barely process what he was saying through my tears. I just nodded into his chest and he continued to let me cry. I felt so safe in his arms in this moment. He was right, I do need him.

~

I couldn't get out of bed for days. The grief struck me overwhelmingly. I couldn't think straight. I just lay in bed and stared at the ceiling for hours at a time. When the foggy mist of the shock that had clouded my rationale finally faded I was left with the remaining thoughts. What was even real in this life anymore? I remember feeling so sad when almost none of my friends showed up to my wedding. I felt so alone and isolated but at least I knew I still had my family and my husband to be there for me and now, all I had was Coriolanus. I love him, I need him, but he's the type that gives love and then takes it away.

Maybe my mom was right... Maybe I do deserve better. This relationship isn't healthy. Has it ever been? Even when I was first falling for him, I always viewed him as better than me, which he is but shouldn't we be equal? Maybe... I'm too reliant on the love he gives me. I hate that. I hate how big of a hold he has on me. The way my happiness is always at the tip of his fingers, it makes me feel so weak. His hold on me is degrading. The worst part is, he knows how strong his power over me is. He knows me. He's learned me inside and out and he knows how to keep me under his palm.

My mom was right. The night of the party, he started yelling at me then when I threatened to leave him he switched. How could- how could I be so stupid? He switched because he didn't want me to leave him. He needed me to be there for him, to be his shining sparkling eye candy, to complete his perfect picture of domestic living, to be his waiting servant. And then when we made love that night, it must've not meant anything to him. He knows I believe everything people do has a purpose, he knows I don't ever want to exchange sex like a handshake. He slept with me to prove to me that he 'loves me' but that can't be true. I love him, his heart will never have space for me in it. No man treats someone he loves the way he treats me. I've been aware of this but every time I've gotten the courage to leave him he pulled me back in.

He's smart, he's manipulative. He's been doing it to me for months now. How could I be so stupid? Love is the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to me. He found his wide-eyed dreamer and just needed to ruin me. Even recently, he used my parent's death to try and make me even more dependent on him and it worked. I can't live without him.

"He did it"

His desk, the poison, no sane and normal man keeps poison in his office. It's making me think. The boy... the one my parents sent. Did Coryo know he was going to be there? He must've, the party was invite-only, you don't just sneak into the capital parties. The last thing Curtis did before he left was pour himself another cup of the juice. When Coryo ushered me into the house, I heard a man coughing from the garden but I didn't look, I couldn't, I was pushed away. His body the next morning... He had blood on his mouth. I remember learning from the academy that some poisons often makes you cough up blood before you die. Coryo had the poison. Could it be... did Coryo murder him?

"He did it"

Before I looked away when I saw his body in the garden, a glint of red could be seen in my vision. Was that his red coat?

"He did it"

Oh my god, the matches. He told me my parents house burned down.

"He did it"

The book with the names and numbers... who's names were in that book? What were the numbers?

"He did it"

I got out of bed for the first time in ages and rushed down to his office. My bones ached from the lack of mobility. I reached his office and rushed in. His notebook was gone. I started opening his drawers frantically. Finally, I found it. I opened up the pages and that was the last bit of proof I needed. His journal had the names and addresses of the different capital citizens, one page dedicated to every member of my family.

"He did it"

The matches were missing fully. Not anywhere to be found.

"He did it"

The doll. My doll. The doll probably reminded him of me, just a pretty object he can play with whenever he wants something to hold. It didn't have a single burn mark on it at all, he must've gotten it before the fire. Either that means my family let him into the house before he burned it down or he's been keeping it for a while.

"He did it"

My mom did say she had been trying to reach out to me for ages but couldn't. He was stopping them. He wanted to keep me isolated. I really didn't know who I was marrying. I married a murderer.

"He did it"

I couldn't continue to live with him but I can't live without him. It made me feel sick how much love I still felt for him even knowing he had been trying to destroy me from the inside out. I can't let him take my light. My mom really was right. Everyone who gets close to him ends up dead, missing, or disgraced. It's my turn to pick which path I was going to be.

My heart raced as I ripped a page out of his notebook and wrote a note for him, leaving it on the desk. I reached over and grabbed that familiar vile of poison and unscrewed the top. The cold glass hit my lips and I drank the contents like a shot. My heart raced and I started coughing profusely, everything burned from the inside out. Blood started to flow out the corners of my mouth but for once, I wasn't crying. Mama, I'm coming.

"He did it"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Coriolanus Snows POV

I'd be lying if I said I didn't cry when I found Y/N dead on the floor of my office. Blood trickled down the side of their mouth and they were holding the tiny vial I had on my desk. Y/N knew not to go into my office and frankly, I was shocked to see that it happened in there. On my desk was a note that said: "Till death do us part". I screamed loudly and felt like my body wasn't my own as I feverishly picked up the body and walked to the nearest in-house medic. Tears poured down my face. How dare Y/N just decide to selfishly leave me like this? After everything I had done? All the trouble I went through? It was ridiculous. I remember thinking, "I had you."

When I first met Y/N I remember believing that they were the embodiment of everything good in the world and the embodiment of what I needed in a partner. Loyal, innocent, trusting, naive, controllable. Truly, there isn't any room in this world for such goodness. My darling needed to be tougher or the cold world would do nothing but ruin them. I tried to make them tougher but their unconditional love was annoying at times but I tolerated it. No matter what I did to push Y/N away, they insisted on loving me till the end, but why? And if they did love me so much why would they leave me like this?

The medic couldn't do anything. Y/N was long gone by the time I got there. So much wasted time and potential. I don't think I will marry again. Not for many years at least. Just when it is time for me to have heirs I will marry. Gives my future wife less time to escape. I have to marry someone cruel, someone whom I can never seem to care about, especially not love. Y/N's crippling kindness almost had me falling at the end and that was dangerous.

The funeral was lavish. My darling was beloved by the public. Many mourned for weeks. It was shocking. As much as I tried to not care, the energy of the house felt so different now. It was a wasteland of what once was. Dust collected in every nook and cranny. I stumbled into the house and stood still, letting the world spin around me for a moment when I tilted my head up and noticed something I hadn't seen before, paintings, hundreds of them. Y/N painted tons of things around the pillars and walls. They were beautiful. Ivy and roses, clouds and sunshine. I forgot how truly artistically talented Y/N was. My eyes followed how the ivy traveled around the pillars. Ivy was a great metaphor for Y/N, beautiful, and simple, but still a pest that will grow all over you if you aren't too careful.

"Sir, Welcome home. We have prepared dinner for you." the butler said, pulling me out of my trance.

"Thank you and can we get someone to repaint this room ASAP, I need some things removed.

-

The whole house ended up being repainted. I never noticed how many of those paintings were left. Even on the furniture, I couldn't escape any of my memories of Y/N anywhere. The notes were the absolute worst. Small pieces of paper everywhere with sweet nothings written on them. "Have a good day", "I love you", "Good morning to Panem's greatest leader" Nowhere was safe. Memories and images circled my brain constantly.

I sat at the table we used to eat at alone, drinking coffee from my mug while reading the newspaper. They still were on the front page. It's been a month since the incident. I sighed and folded the paper, placing it face down on the table. I reached for the mug when I saw it again. A painting of a lake with roses and ivy painted on the handle. The lake... the lake. The lake of District 12,

Lucy Gray

The roses,

My Mother

The Ivy...,

y/n

I shouted at the top of my lungs and threw the mug at the wall. When will I finally be free of the past pests that continue to haunt my life?

~

A/N: WHAT DID YOU GUYS THINK??? It is almost 5 AM and I stayed up all night writing this, I hope you guys liked it. let me know plz. Now accepting requests for new stories, perhaps with new characters :)))

[makethosenarratorsfight]

UNRELIABLE NARRATORS; SEMI FINALS

*NOTE; propaganda is out of order due to the post length!

Eugenides Propaganda:

the entire plot hinges on a detail he lets the reader (and every other character) assume is true. I don't want to spoil it because it's a really fun reveal but he is lying from the first second he appears on the page and you can't trust him to tell the full truth about ANYTHING related to himself and his goals. he mostly does it to keep his advantage and not have other characters be suspicious of him but it's just so fun when you realise he's been lying the whole time

Kim Dokja Propaganda:

I haven't read orv but he's fucking gotta be from what I've osmosised

He tries to remove his emotions out of the narrative soooo much, literally the most repressed guy ever. Okay so for context orv is about how this guy, Kim Dokja, has been the only reader of an obscure post-apocalyptic webnovel for years and the novel suddenly becomes reality. And at first you'll probably get the weird impression that his behavior is pretty strange for, you know, a literal apocalypse happening in his world - like yes, he is concerned with survival but he doesn't seem all that scared and he kinda treats it like a video game where he has to grind to make himself stronger and he also treats his companions like a party in an rpg. Then there's also the way he approaches the protagonist of the webnovel, from the start he just kind of describes him as a ruthless psychopath and jerk that is unfortunately a pretty useful ally. And also there's the fact that he carefully omits any mention of his past and when somebody asks if he's worried about his family when the apocalypse starts he just kinda... brushes it off? Anyway so yeah, this bastard is definitely traumatized, although I don't know how much of spoiler territory that would be, considering the fact that literally when he first reveals his trauma he's also unreliable about it. And turns out he does indeed, care A LOT about this world and the people around him. Because well, he kinda didn't care to mention that this webnovel that has become reality was like... literally his whole world before it literally became his whole world. Like, it was the only thing keeping him going for 10+ years and the protagonist that he likes to call a stupid jerk was his comfort character who he pretended to be when he felt like he couldn't handle something in his life by being himself. The protagonist is also canonically the person he loves the most according to a prophecy and he literally can't fathom the thought of him dying, even the timeline versions of him that directly oppose him. And I haven't even mentioned the Fourth Wall yet but I feel like this propaganda is a little long already

misreading the intentions of his companion (yoo joonghyuk) so many time.

YOU DON'T UNDERSTANDDD DOKJA IS SUCH A UNRELIABLE NARRATORRRRRR GOD I COULD WRITE AN ESSAY BUT I KNOW YOU LOVE DOKJA TOO BUT OMG HE'S JUST SO AAAAAAAAAAAH

Rest of Propaganda under cut!

he is the worst like actually. he starts the story talking about how normal and average he is. he is not. he is constantly mischaracterizing his friends and he's so good at lying to the readers that you don't even realize it at first. almost every single time he cries we have to be told by other characters because he never says it himself. there is literally a scene where his narration says "i wasn't crying" and then the in-universe entity that narrates the actions of people (orv is really weird and meta) says that he was, in fact, crying. honestly genuinely anything he says about himself (or doesn't say) cannot be trusted. he is just so frustrating. he drives me mad. i love him dearly. but he drives me so mad.

Dictionary definition of unreliable narrator. Does not tell the reader anything and then things happen and he's like oh yeah btw there was also this and this earlier but i just didn't feel like mentioning it. There's even a thing called the "Fourth Wall" that is able to see through kdj's bs so occasionally you get gems like,

Kim Dokja: I didn't cry

The Fourth Wall: [Kim Dokja was crying]

Imagine being so unreliable as a narrator you need a more powerful narrator to call out the actual narrator.

^ same submission, just spacing it out

This goes into spoiler territory, but; Kim Dokja is in possession of a skill called the Fourth Wall, which on the surface seems like it appears because he read the book that reverse-isekai’d into his own. However, as the story goes on it becomes clear that it’s pretty much a souped up version of his pre-existing dissociation. You cannot trust him to be honest about his feelings, his past traumas or his feelings about his past traumas, not to mention his tendency to just outright omit information that only gets revealed later on either when it becomes relevant or when an outsider POV reveals what’s actually happening.

Exhibit A: he says (in 1st person POV) that he’s not crying. The Fourth Wall immediately contradicts this (as it is literally words of the novel) by saying (in 3rd person POV) ‘Kim Dokja was crying’.

Exhibit B: Fails to mention entire actions when it shows him emotionally honest even in the slightest; we had to read from another character entirely when Kim Dokja was being physically affectionate with his companion. It’s so bad that there’s this entire paragraph about Kim Dokja describing himself hiding his eyes in his hands in jerky, weirdly specific detail and just AVOIDING EVERY WORD THAT MIGHT SHOW HE’S CRYING. The brilliance of ORV is that when you re-read the entire thing you get hints that ‘yes, this WAS hinted at the entire time’ but you have to dig it out of Kim Dokja’s repressed, depressed self-hating internal dialogue with your own two hands.

^ same submission, spacing it out (i really should've done this earlier.)

i am a simple man (not a man). i see a tumblr text post with the words “unreliable narrator in it”. i read nothing else. i reblog & tag #kim dokja okay but in all seriousness i’m just going with the musty basic example: so there’s this moment where he sacrifices himself to save this guy. as he lays on the ground bleeding out, he says “hey, you don’t like me, right? you should kill me to get some money” the guy says “no kim dokja i cant do that (going through the five stages of grief except there’s only one and it’s anger)” the constellations (twitch viewers irl) are like omg he (the guy) doesn’t want to kill his companion (kim dokja) and shower him (the guy) with money kim dokja: oh, he’s not killing me for the money. smart!

as i quote a brilliant youtube video (all of omniscient reader’s viewpoint in 6 minutes) “yoo joonghyuk sees kim dokja as a c_____”

yoo joonghyuk: companion

kim dokja: cunt

^ same submission, once again. spacing it out.

Hides his true feelings, tells the readers what he thinks is convenient for the plot and that his own personal feelings don’t matter or are not so significant. Has unreliable thoughts abt his companion and is a liar. And is also an omniscient reader.

Kim Dokja always perceived his companions in this like nonchalant way like “oh yeah we get along but really we’re just fighting to survive (apocalypse setting) it doesn’t run that deep” when they all do genuinely care for him and he does in turn. He just, doesn’t think of it as an equal relationship? Dokja’ll sacrifice a lot for them but will get seriously flabbergasted if they do the same thing, so fricking problematic. Not to mention Yoo Joonghyuk, his “Life and Death Companion” (read: husband). Kim Dokja always seems to think that Joonghyuk has it out for him, which is kinda true, but he is literally blind to the fact that he’s attached to him. Like, it’s so obvious??? Also they have hella sexual tension but that’s another thing entirely

se get some many pov changes where kdj in his pov just assumed things based on what he knew the characters would do. however because of his interference the characters have changed and he wouldn’t know that if it hit him in the face

He's an unreliable narrator because he lies to himself and thus the audience. He literally rewrote his own childhood core memory. If someone says, "this guy is my friend!" He will go through so many hoola hoops in his mind just to rationalize it. Because he fundamentally believe that no one could love him and even if they did they couldn't know him and he's just gonna hurt them. He cries sometimes in canon but a lot of those times it's not even mentioned as crying he's that unreliable of a narrator. No joke, one time this guys he has a gay thing with called him his "companion" to someone who had just killed him (long story) and this bitch thought "oh wow he's doing it for the coins (another long story) he's so smart i wish I'd thought to that. He's terrible. He literally has an exchange with something called the Fourth Wall (an even longer story) where it said "you're crying" and he said "no I'm not" but he was crying. He makes me insane because the reader is supposed to project onto him. He made me see how much of an unreliable narrator I WAS. ORV is just like that tho.

[redrook]

listen. Raava is a lesbian.

I've been re-reading all the Avatar books, and the common thread is that once the Avatar enters the Avatar state, they start falling in love with a girl.

Kyoshi? Originally in love with a boy, Yun, when she's barely able to bend even her native element. Her first sign of being the Avatar is singing love poetry from her past life about a woman. Once she finally enters the Avatar state, she almost immediately starts thinking about how beautiful her longtime friend Rangi is.

Roku? Fell in love and got married to a woman after mastering all the elements and the Avatar state.

Aang? Wakes up from a 100 year coma brought on by the Avatar State (normally completely encasing someone in ice will just. kill them.) and he gets a heart-rending crush on the very first girl that he sees

Korra? Again like Kyoshi, when she's initially blocked in her bending and unable to control the Avatar State, she's in love with a guy. Once she masters the Avatar State, she starts getting into fights with Mako. The more she connects with Raava, the more they fight, until finally they break-up (the only Avatar breakup we are ever shown). Once Raava fully awakens within Korra in the season 4 finale, IMMEDIATELY after she asks out Asami on their spirit world date.

Kuruk? Constantly entering the Avatar State, and was a notorious lady's man (after his spirit was damaged fighting other spirits, the only thing that could "restore" his spirit was drinking and "the touch of warm bodies". Raava was like man we gotta recharge.)

What about Yangchen, you may ask? She hasn't fallen in love with any woman. Yangchen is the exception that proves the rule. Yangchen, despite her spirituality, is the most earthly attached Avatar. She chose humanity, over and over, and many spirits turned dark as a result of her actions. Even though she is connected to all of her past lives, not once does she bring up Raava or even mention a light spirit. She also mentions that maintaining the Avatar State is incredibly difficult for her, and that she has a low reserve of energy. Yangchen is the most connected to earthly attachments, the least connected to Raava, and is therefore able to resist the impending push of lesbianism.

Raava is a lesbian.

[pseudophan]

some post wad weekend thoughts...

i just wrote all this on the plane and haven't read it through so apologies for any mistakes

first of all, this weekend was incredible. i usually just kinda sit at home doing not much of anything, and this was a much needed break to actually have some fun. london in general always lifts my spirits but i suppose that danisnotonfire guy contributed a little as well.

guys i think i've met more people the past few days than i otherwise have in years. like. holy shit. i started listing people but i'm petrified i'll forget someone so i chickened out, sorry about that. but you all know who you are. i've met friends i've had for years, people i used to know but haven't spoken to in what feels like a decade, newer friends, and a frankly baffling amount of people i didn't know yet but who told me they've followed me for ages. like holy fuck you guys lmao what the hell??? and i mean did the reaction ever get old no of course it didn't. bad for my ego i'm sure but totally worth it. there's something very amusing and incredibly surreal about being chronically lame in most aspects of life and then suddenly finding yourself in an environment where you're kinda cool???? SO fucking fun oh my god, but also i do kinda feel like i've tricked you all? but hey i'll happily let you keep believing i'm cool, that is more than fine with me.

most importantly though everyone was SO lovely. like i said i don't think i've spoken to this many people in such a short amount of time in years and every single person i talked to was awesome. guys did you know phannies are kind of great... don't tell anyone but, lowkey... everyone is so funny and cool and absolutely insane but in a good way (shoutout everyone left at the gates until the very end, we should probably get some help).

and then lastly of course, mr howell himself. i talk about this a lot i feel like but fuck me that man was born to perform. whether you think he's actually funny or not, nobody can argue he doesn't absolutely thrive on a stage. he plays off the audience so well and he's so very obviously having the time of his fucking life. i'd already seen the show twice before this, and i didn't think anything would top the previous london show but man... the first night he came back out after the show having clearly been tearing up backstage, apologising for being an inconsistent absent parent, and i can't lie the "i had daddy issues and THEN i subscribed to dan howell" got me cause yeah no literally dude, you nailed it, exactly, well done. i think something about doing this show again, his magnum opus as he considers it, now after the dapg return was very special to him. he seems genuinely surprised that so many of us were ready to just jump back in like nothing happened, i don't think he was expecting so many people to still be waiting and it's... man. he comes off so grateful for us all and it's so fucking sweet. and then on the last night, i think that was my favourite, when the show ended and he got the standing ovation and people throwing him flowers.. he was so HAPPY. and clearly overwhelmed with emotion which, i gotta say, there is something honestly kinda funny about daniel howell standing in front of you trying not to cry. like no by all means dude go ahead, please, you've made me cry an endless amount of times it's only fair.

ugh. i'm proud of him or whatever. dick. and i'm proud of our ridiculous fucking community. i'm not sure what 14 year old nora would say if you'd told me i'd still be kicking it in the phandom a decade on, but at almost 25 (fml) i'm so so happy to be here still. you know, we get a bad rep, but i genuinely think as far as fanbases go we're pretty solid. and i love you all so much.

i believe i will have to rob a bank or something because the next time dan and/or phil do a tour i think i'll have to just show up at every date like i'm sorry but this was too good of a high we need to do it again immediately

anyway. back to work 💪

(by which i mean giffing dan and phil. i am still very much unemployed. fr though i'm two whole videos behind this has never happened i feel weird. who am i)

[dotster001]

Q.P.R. Headcanons; First years

I never knew that I needed aro head cannons in my life but now I need like 42 more so I DEMAND *asking nicely* for more please - @bakdbfi

Summary: aro-ace first years x aro-ace gn! Reader. Things you guys get up to in a queerplatonic relationship.

A/N: hee hee I am once again on time for aro awareness week 😁

Dorm Leaders

Tbh, I've always wanted to go up to him and say, “Hey Ace, I'm ace!” But if you did this while you're in a QPR, he'd always come up with a snarky comment. Maybe say something like, "Nah, I'm Ace. Fuck off." Smh. He's so silly. I wanna throw rocks at him

He's the aro-ace that always forgets he's aro-ace. He'll come up to you like, “Guess who has a date!” Then he'll come see you afterwards, his eyes dead, and he'll be like, “So, I got distracted by how pretty they are. Oops.” He sees people as attractive, but when he tries to bridge the gap, he's always like, oh, yeah, nevermind. And then he complains to you about it, as though you were the one to set up the date!

He's always in your space. Being in a QPR with him is like gaining an extra cat. He's so affectionate, as long as you don't say anything. He'll scoot his chair so close to yours that your legs touch. If you're laying on the couch, he will climb over you and shove himself into your arms, in the most awkward, clumsy way possible. BUT IF YOU SAY ANYTHING…. he's gonna gaslight the hell out of you. He didn't want to touch you, get out of his space. Or, pay him if you wanna be in his space so badly.

Not only is he in your space, but he's stealing your food. What's yours is his, and what's his is his. He'll reach his fork over to your plate, and pick up your food. You'll wake up to a noise at three in the morning, and you'll see him raiding your fridge. If you ever become roommates, you'll catch him eating your labeled leftovers, zero shame on his face. What? True love is sharing food with your bestie!

Calls you his wife/husband/spouse when he introduces you. Then he can't fight off the shit eating grin on his face.

You know…honestly… if your mc isn't romantic with Ace, I'd say that in game they already kind of have a QPR. Calling it canon right now. He's just always slightly more close than a friend, but also not quite to romantic. 

If you read the first rendition of these HC's, he's a lot like Kalim. He just…doesn't get it. Ace tries to explain that the love he feels for his best friend (you) is different to romantic love and he just never gets it. If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, Deuce wants to marry his best friend. He says he wants to marry you all the time. Let's get married and have kids but like in a friend way. His mom and you just smile and shake your heads.

Btw? Mama Spade? That's your mom now. The Spade household has a room set aside for you anytime you want to come over, but it always ends up in Deuce joining you for a cuddle sesh. Sometimes, he won't change rooms until you are half asleep, and he'll slowly open the door, and stand in the doorway. He just looks so sad, standing there in his jammies, holding his extra pillow, so you'd be a monster not to let him in.

Would you co parent some chickens with him? Please please please! He promises he'll do most of the work, he just needs an extra helper!

If you are separated, he will die. He doesn't make the rules. He wants you to be his partner on projects. He wants you to move in with him. And of course you gotta go into the same career after graduation. When people meet him, they just think he is the mopiest little guy. Then, when they see the two of you together, it's like he's a completely different person! Deuce has been asked twice now if he has a secret twin. (Deuce doesn't understand the question)

Greets you with cheek kisses. If you don't do it back, or don't pay enough attention the first time, he makes a very obnoxious kissing sound. He learned this technique from Meemaw. She taught him that the more embarrassing it is, the more likely you are to reciprocate the love he gives.

The boy grew up in a country area with a sweet old grandma. He's always going to be feeding you. It's very rare, when you two are alone, that he's not trying to put some food in your mouth, because “you're not eatin’ enough!” And he's aggressive about it! If you try to dodge the fork he brings to your mouth, he's gonna chase you, pin you down, kick your shins, whatever it takes to get you to eat. Plus, he put all of his love into that food! Why don't you want it?!

Meemaw wants you both to get married. And whenever she says something, Epel makes a loud gagging sound. Which of course prompts you to begin bickering with him about why he wouldn't want to marry you, which usually results in him saying something mean or bratty about how you are unmarriageable. Meemaw sighs happily, thinking she's got you on the right track, but nah. You two are having a fight about something neither of you even wanted.

Likes to tuck you into bed. It's a weird thing of his. For all of how aggressive most of his love is, right before bed, he is at his sweetest. He tells you it's bed time, and pulls back the covers. He gently tucks you in, and gives you a kiss on the forehead. Then he flops onto the bed next to you, completely wrecking the moment. But he sleeps hot, so he's not gonna join you under the covers.

This one is like having a big brother. He has scary dog privileges. Any haters/bullies/naySayers are going to have to be able to spread their hate with him standing behind you and glaring at them. And if they somehow are brave enough to do it, then they have to be brave enough to ignore his vicious growl.

In his birthday note to me, this year, he was like, “my gift for you is to make you buff.” This is your everyday life now. You will be buff. How else are you supposed to be safe when he's not there? (This logic is flawed. He is always there.)

Wants to have a family. But since neither of you are super into the traditional way of having a family, he would like it if you'd adopt and co raise a couple of kids with him. He knows the two of you together would make great parents. 

If you learned how to make pear compote, and then make it for him when he's having a bad day, he might almost figure out what romantic love feels like. Almost. His heart would just be so full, and so light, that he could almost mistake it for being in love with you. Almost.

He likes for you both to help each other out with cleanliness. You help him clean his ears and tail, and he helps brush your hair and teeth. It makes him feel loved when you help him groom. So he loves to return the favor. It really instills the familial feel he has around you.

Sebek’s a romance repulsed aro-ace. Anytime he thinks of anyone having ooey gooey feelings for another person, he dry heaves a little. In his words, “IF THEY HAD PURE DEVOTION FOR SOMEONE, THE WAY I AM DEVOTED TO MY LORD, THEY WOULD HAVE NO NEED FOR SUCH FOOLISHNESS.”

Never puts a label on what you two are. He invites you to move in with him after graduation to “remind him what happens if you forget to train and refuse to eat Lilia's healthy meals”. If you were a stranger, you'd be hurt. But you know it's an excuse. He really just likes having you around. It fills a hole in his heart.

His love language is “caring for your fragile human body”. If you slightly shiver, even if it's just a random reaction, he is scooping you up, wrapping you in a blanket burrito, and spoon feeding you soup. If you try to escape your blanket, he gently shushes you, caressing your cheek and whispering about how you need to hang on a little longer. He'll save you, don't go yet! (Similar things happen when you cut yourself, stub your toe, accidentally skip a meal…his dad and Silver may be human, but, no offense, he didn't care that much until it was about you.)

You're the equivalent of a comfort blanket. When Lilia sees Sebek having a bad day, he'll snatch you away from whatever you are doing, then place you in front of him. Sebek immediately gets distracted and starts cooing at you about how wonderful you are, and how other people should try to be like you. Every. Single. Time.

Trains you to sword fight. After you become special to him, he realizes that people may target you, in order to weaken him, and thus get a direct route to Lord Malleus. Delusional So he wants you to be able to protect yourself if he is out of reach.

He's big on setting his hand on top of your head, then messing up your hair aggressively. Then he lets out a booming laugh about how cute human reactions are.

Sometimes, he gets so happy when he sees you that he just…bites you. He'll come in for a hug, and the next thing you know, he's chomped down on your shoulder with a relaxed smile. Sometimes you'll be watching a movie together, and he'll unconsciously take your hand, and bring your forearm to his mouth so he can gently bite it. You're a fidget toy now. You'll have to get used to it.

[anathemafiction]

Hello! I've been a fan of you for some time now, and I've grown to be interested in writing an interactive novel myself! Problem is, I have no idea how to start. How did you get into writing interactive fiction and how is the process different than writing a regular novel? What do you like most about it? Thanks and have a great day!

Hello!! I got into Interactive Fiction when I first read Choice of the Dragon and Heroes Rise all those years back. From there, I read more and more games and, eventually, found the Cog forum full of WIPS— at the time, Tumblr IF culture didn't exist.

The big game changers, however, were Choice of Rebels and Zombie Exodus: Safe Heaven. When I read those games, I was blasted with the full potential of this medium. Like a great, blazing wind hitting me in the face, I understood we can create worlds, weave narratives, and write characters as layered as the ones we read about in a traditional book.

Plus, you get a say in what happens!

I can't say exactly how different it is to write traditional novels because I never wrote a full book. Before the Rose, I wrote a lot of short stories. But, IF is extremely different from traditional writing because, most of all, the protagonist doesn't belong to you. The characters, even, don't belong to you. It's a two-way street of creating a story with strangers you'll never meet.

So, you must consider, always, the reader. Whether in traditional writing, my advice is that you shouldn't. Write for yourself, yes, but in IF, you can't do it 100%. Writing is a dialogue between myself and this metaphorical, all-encompassing reader.

The best thing is that in collaborative writing you'll come up with phrases, situations, and even characters you never planned. Beka, the Goliath, and even, to some degree, Lance, are all characters that would have been tiny footnotes if not for this internal reader that demanded: "Wait, but I want to know more about this person."

It's a lot of work. Right now, I'm in a bit of a slog where I have to write different conversations and, even, different start of scenes based on previous choices. It has made me slow down my writing speed considerably. Is it fun to go over a scene two, three, sometimes even four times? No. It's tedious. IF writing will have a lot of times where you'll just have to do something even when you don't particularly enjoy it.

But, when you do get to the parts you enjoy? When the text comes alive and the protagonist goes from this vague, silhouette-like blob in your mind to a fully-formed, distinct person? When the MC turned into Romanus and a city I saw on the map into Tarragona, or a bard who is secretly a spy deepened into one of my favorite characters I've ever written? Those moments make all the tedious ones worth it.

You gotta love it, that's my advice. If you don't, you'll never finish the project. No matter how many likes, asks, and fanart you get.

[nouies]

hello and welcome to the first fic rec of 2024 featuring my favourite works from what i’ve read during the past weeks. as always, please check tags before reading. if you liked the fics please reblog their posts, leave kudos and write a nice comment. happy reading! rec tag | more rec lists

— harry/louis —  

໑ Red Wine/Long Nights by lucky28 (G, 1.3k, strangers to lovers, infidelity, fluff) When Louis goes to surprise his boyfriend with an unexpected dinner date, he's nothing but excited. That is, until he runs into his boyfriend's boyfriend along the way.

໑ Abundance by @rockstarlwt28 (M, 1.7k, established relationship, breastfeeding, failure of conception, fluff) The Tomlinson-Styles' family are blessed with their own Christmas miracle, Tallulah Jay. A lifetime of happiness follows her birth, her mother, Louis and father, Harry are instilled with hope and an abundance of love to double their already blossoming marriage.

໑ make my wish come true by localopa / @voulezloux (NR, 2.4k, friends to lovers, flat mates, christmas, angst with happy ending) the one where all harry wants for christmas is lou

໑ heaven in these sheets by @thepolourryexpress (E, 3.5k, established relationship, bunny hybrid louis, pwp, fluff) Bunny Hybrid Louis has it out for his boyfriend’s phone.

໑ powerless (and i don't care) by localopa / @voulezloux (E, 4k, established relationship, canon, fluff, slight angst) everyone on tour calls each other daddy, don’t ask why. and louis is so used to calling everyone “daddy” that, when he finally comes home, naturally he calls harry that.

໑ now you hang from my lips by teenytinytomlinson / @hs3lt2 (E, 6k, red herring, implied cheating, read tags and author’s note) Louis goes out and finds exactly what, or rather who, he’s looking for at the hotel bar.

໑ You're like a Sponge (Abrasive and Colorful) by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup (T, 6.5k, coworkers, university au, hate to love sort of) Louis's flirts look an awful lot like insults.

໑ Behind Smoke Stained Curtains by @jaerie (E, 19k, strangers to lovers, a/b/o au, truckers, secret identity, one night stands) The worlds align when Louis meets an alpha from the road with as many secrets as he holds himself.

໑ i feel like this is the beginning, though I've loved you for a million years by puppyvirvinloui (spanish, NR, 22.8k, established relationship, marriage, sunshine/grumpy, trophy wife louis, pregnancy) Louis quiere un bebé, no está muy seguro de que Harry quiera lo mismo.

໑ sunshine (you temptress) by @petitommo (E, 26.8k, acquaintances, complicated relationships, age difference) Harry had everything he'd ever wanted in life. Well established, in love, and on the very precipice of the rest of his life, everything goes wrong. The road forwards is paved with difficult emotions, firm denial, and a complicated relationship to the strange teenager he'd snorted coke off of that one eventful night at the club.

໑ the mountain between us by happilylarry (NR, 31k, strangers to lovers, plane crash, surgeon harry, photographer louis, injuries, angst) Harry is a surgeon and stranded at Salt Lake City International Airport. He is to perform a surgery in fourteen hours in Boston. Louis is a journalist and stranded at Salt Lake City International Airport. He is to be married in ten hours. They decide to charter a private airplane to Denver, where they will get on their respective flights and part ways.

Or so they thought.

໑ You Ain’t Gotta Feel Fear Just Mingle by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup (T, 32.7k, co-workers, advent fic, library au, christmas, fluff, humour) Harry has been at his dream job for less than three months, and he knows two things for sure; first, his project manager doesn't know what he's doing, and second, someone in the office is apparently pure evil, and no one will tell Harry who it is.

Oh, and the guy who works in conservation at the other end of the building is the most beautiful man Harry's ever seen, even when wielding a hot iron as a weapon.

Happy Christmas, here's to many more.

໑ I Really Like Your Styles: The Baking Advent-ure by @homosociallyyours (T, 34k, strangers to lovers, advent fic, coffee shop au, barista louis, baker harry, food, american au) Louis isn't much for frills, and the coffee shop he co-owns with his best friend Liam is evidence of that. Yes, it's got a decent sized, well-kept industrial kitchen, but Louis insists that people come to coffee shops for coffee, not mediocre pastry and plastic wrapped cookies. When Liam's campaign for serving treats turns into watching a few baking accounts on whichever popular app he's on, there's one that really gets on Louis' nerves: "I Like Your Styles." With his chipper demeanor and over the top descriptions of the food he makes, Louis is sure that the (unfortunately cute) baker is full of it. Nothing that adorable could possibly be worth the hype.

It doesn't actually take much for him to eat his words…and some quality baked goods, while he's at it.

— rare pairs —

໑ for the rest of my life (for the rest of yours) by localopa / @voulezloux (louis/zayn, M, 1.5k, exes with benefits, canon au, song fic) zayn and louis are exes. they still sleep together.

[doublerainebow]

Roronoa Zoro x Reader

Look, I gotta be honest, I've never actually watched One Piece outside of the episodes that would air on Toonami back in the day, and I only really cared enough about it because my brother-in-law and my irl best friend both LOVE One Piece... and now my older brother is getting into One Piece too... but like I said in a previous post, I caved and ended up watching the One Piece Live Action (though I guess it didn't help that seeing Taryn cosplay as Zoro kinda reawakened my crush on ZoloZoro as a 4kids)... and I'm also sick right now and I have nothing better to do than write some Zoro boyfriend headcanons apparently. Aside from watching the OPLA, I did do my research on Zoro.. research being reading his page on the OP Wiki 😂😂

Okay, I'm rambling too much and this is still the introduction asdfghjkl

EDIT: Added the links lmao

~ Masterlist ~

The way Mackenyu said that he looked at his wife and knew that he wanted to marry her (supposedly, I couldn't find any concrete sources for this save for a YouTube video using TTS... but hey, it fed my imagination for this), I felt that so much for Zoro.

Of course, it doesn't happen overnight for Zoro. It takes a while, maybe even years, for him to look at you and be like, "I wouldn't mind settling down with you if possible." Oh boy, but when it does happen, he becomes very perceptive of you.

Just like his training, he takes his relationship with you very seriously, and even if he doesn't act on his feelings for you straight away--because one, he has a strong sense of duty to Luffy first, and two, you'd be his first and maybe only romantic partner ever--he'd still reserve a certain amount of softness and gentleness to you when not in the presence of others.

Let's go back to Zoro's perceptiveness really quickly. Yes, my man can be a dumbass at the best and worst of times and we all love that about him, but when it comes down to what's important, he knows how to analyze and read the situation. So, because he views you as someone important and someone he should take seriously, he's going to personally be making sure that you're okay, mentally, emotionally, and physically. He's that dedicated to you.

There will be times where his loyalty to Luffy might have to take center stage in the relationship, especially if its during a critical juncture, rest assured that he will do his best to make it up to you afterwards. He doesn't voice it often because of his strong loyalty to Luffy, but there are brief times in which he wishes that he could just spend time with you.

Now, Zoro isn't one for PDA, he gets very embarrassed by it because showing affection in public isn't something that he's comfortable with doing, but, get him out of public and into private, that man is on you, no question. The most affection he's comfortable with showing in public is you two taking a nap together, or even sharing a bottle together (which is very hard to get him to do, the man loves his alcohol, so congrats if you manage it).

As an official romantic partner, he's actually very sweet. Yes, he can come off as very blunt and cold sometimes, but he's just being honest with you. To him, its more important to be truthful than to sugarcoat things. For you, however, he's working on saying things more gently if in the case you get hurt by his initial blunt tendencies. Past that, however, he tends to you with the same care he tends to his swords. He sees a fruit or snack that you adore in the markets when he's helplessly lost? He'll absolutely buy it for you. Finds an item you've been wanting for a while? Don't worry, he's already paying for it. He finds out that you maybe feel a bit homesick? He'll begrudgingly ask Sanji to cook one of your favorite hometown dishes. He sees that you're feeling down on yourself? He's there to either quietly lend an ear or his presence, whichever you need. My man is an attentive boyfriend.

Also also, Zoro is a man of few words, so don't expect to hear him say, "I love you," very often, but that's okay. He's a man of few words, but his actions speak so much for him. You can feel him say those words in the way he kisses you thoughtfully, in the way he holds you so securely to him when you two nap or sleep together, in the way he dutifully monitors your alcohol intake (if you drink alcohol of course), in the way he tends to you carefully if you get hurt in a fight. To him, words are useless and actions mean so much more.

In other words, Zoro would make the best boyfriend in his special own way.

[icepoptroll]

So I've been heavy into RTC in recent months. As well I work as a nurse. So naturally this idea came to me:

Everyone Lives AU where the choir kids survive the Cyclone accident, wake up in the hospital, and come to find out their nurse is a guy named. . . Yep. Karnak

Ricky wrote him a lengthy note between hourly rounds about how they all had died and they were in limbo and he was there too, and while he was there he was a magical mechanical fortune teller with prognostication and resurrection abilities, and how he's not sure how he's there with them now because a rat had killed him by chewing through his power cable. Karnak reads it and responds with a chuckle and "ah yes, your parents DID mention that you have a very active imagination, Richard." *Queue gobsmacked Ricky face*

Ocean is more scared and freaked out and still not past her initial stress response, all "How are we all still alive? How are YOU alive? You just DIED back there. And I thought you could only bring back one of us! That WHOLE TIME you were just testing us??? What kind of messed up game are we playing now?"

"I'm sorry. I'm afraid I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oooooh yes you do! You were some kind of. . . Ominous novelty machine just before all this!"

"Ah. Curious, one of your friends accused me of the same thing. Quite an interesting phenomenon, how multiple people are on occasion found to somehow suffer the same exact nightmare. This is likely a result of your shared trauma--- I assure you I am just a med-surg nurse. I am not now, nor have I ever been, an 'ominous novelty machine.'"

"So it's just some wacky coincidence that we all remember someone JUST LIKE YOU from the afterlife and now all of a sudden we're all assigned to you? You had no part in that?"

"If I had my way, Miss Rosenberg, I would be assigned to only three of you. Unfortunately, though, safe nurse/patient ratios have really fallen to the wayside in recent years. Now. . . Before I continue my rounding, do you have any questions about your medication?"

The kids convene and question whether maybe he IS just a dude with the same name but COME ON his voice and mannerisms are all the same and he even kinda looks like him and the timing is just too perfect to be coincidental and the way he cracks a smile when someone calls him "Mr. Whatever" like it's him it's gotta be him

Definitely gonna think of more and most likely gonna end up drawing/writing stuff for this lol I just can't resist letting my work influence my hobbies haha

[theharlotofferelden]

So I was checking out Greg Ellis' IMDB page to see if he's been in anything recently. I mainly wanted to know if the whole blowup between him and Mark Darrah 3 years ago that resulted in him making a YouTube video speaking in Cullen's voice while beseeching the Dragon Age fandom to rise up against Cancel Culture affected his career in any way.

This was swiftly forgotten, however, due to the fact that I got really caught up in the wall of text that is his Mini Bio.

It's a lot, right? Usually when I see bios on IMDB they're less than a paragraph. But what got me was the inclusion of all these weird details. How Greg "mastered the Rubik's cube at 12" and that he's "skydived 10,000 feet above the earth" (so? ppl skydive, man, why is this important). But then there's this mention that he has over 20 action figures of characters he's portrayed in film and television. Like... seriously? This is really worth including in your IMDB Bio? Then right at the bottom it says the Bio was written by PR which lol

Anyway, I didn't post on tumblr dot com just to dunk on all the questionable details Greg PR decided to include in his IMDB.

What I wanna talk about is this lil detail here:

Now, I've read his IMDB bio a couple times over the years and have never really questioned whether Greg was truly nominated for an Emmy. Like, who tf would lie about being nominated for an Emmy? But then I started wondering what the Emmy was for (seeing as how he neglects to mention it in his bio) so I decided to do some digging into what he was nominated for.

Doing a general google search turned up nothing so I decided to try his website to see if he supplies more details, and he does.

Again, he neglects to mention what the nomination was for, but says that he was nominated for his role on 24. So naturally I did a search for 24 Emmy nominations.

It is at this point I become aware that the Emmys have not only dedicated pages for shows that have won Emmys, but also a search function.

Guess whose name isn't listed on 24's Emmy Award page?

Guess whose name doesn't reveal any results for even something as basic as an Emmy nomination?

Even under his legal name? Or the other version of his legal name?

Okay, so maybe they just neglected to add him on the 24 page. If Greg was nominated for anything, it would most likely be under "Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Drama Series" as he was a guest actor for 9 episodes of the show (as Michael Amador) between 2003 and 2004.

He's not listed in the nominees for 2003, 2004, or even 2005 (just to be generous). And since I bothered to look it up just to double check, here's a YouTube video for every year in this category: 2003, 2004, 2005.

-------

While all this may seem like a bit much just to emphasize that Greg is lying about an Emmy nomination, I need it to be understood that I did my best trying to verify its existence. On the off chance it turns out the nomination exists somewhere, let it be known I'll delete this post and apologize for misinforming people.

But I just gotta say, if it's not on the Emmy's website or even his own Wikipedia page, then where tf is it? Like, I get that Wikipedia isn't a totally reliable source, but Gregory Itzin, who actually was nominated twice on 24 as a supporting actor, has it not only mentioned on his wikipedia page, but also has one of his nominations sourced (if you click on the link it will download a PDF).

So until proof that he was ever nominated turns up, I'm going to assume he's lying about it. Which is funny when you consider he's not even lying about winning an Emmy, he's lying about being nominated for one. He's lying about losing an Emmy. Like, could you imagine if Tommy Tallarico lied about almost being on MTV Cribs?

Anyway please reblog this post and feel free to steal it because I find this extremely funny and would love it if someone asked Greg why the internet isn't turning up results for his Totally Real Emmy Nomination.

ETA - Adding a link to @aidanchaser pointing out that it seems like Greg is claiming he was nominated under the categories for "outstanding casting in a drama series" and/or "outstanding drama series" based on what he says about the nomination on his website, along with my reply as I was aware of those nominations but didn't make the connection between them and what he says on his website.

I'm only going to add here that his claim to this nomination is a huge stretch because, by similar logic, if 24 actually won either of those nominations, basically anyone who worked on 24 could claim that they're an Emmy award winning guest actor or production designer, which entirely misrepresents the award being given as it hollistically takes into account various parts of the casting and production. Like, there's a reason there's separate categories for this stuff, and the fact that he seems so comfortable making this claim on his IMDB that he's an "Emmy nominated actor" based on those nominations is such a wild stretch.

And it's clear to me this obfuscation was intentional because he could've easily said that he worked on the "Emmy award winning show, 24" because that's more accurate to the truth of his involvement with the production (i.e. that he worked on a show that won muliple awards). But specifically claiming he was "nominated" lends credence to the notion that he was nominated specifically for his work while still technically being true (despite that claim being bullshit).