#but the olive oil is Such a good choice

[boyfeminism]

guy whose work is letting hir experiment with the challah recipe <3

[veilchenjaeger]

Food sparks so much joy. I'm so glad we evolved to eat.

[cdragons]

Fuck Everything, But Mostly Fuck You

Next Part

Summary: You have never, EVER, in a million years hated anyone the way you hated Felix fucking Catton.

Warnings- MDNI 18+, Felix is delulu, Reader is stressed and homesick and kinda crazy but she a baddie, Michael is Michael, Farleigh is Farleigh, Oliver will be Oliver (a creep), and author has spent too much time researching Oxford crap for this mess for a crack fic to be a crack fic

Author's Note: This fic is a follow-up to this post and I would like to thank grammarly for catching all my grammatical errors 🥲, @ethereal-athalia for enabling my crazy ideas 🥰, and @valeskafics for providing me Saltburn smut when I catch myself thirsting 😇

“FUCK!” you yelled at the top of your lungs just before your nose slammed down on the dewy grass.

Groaning in pain before the mortification of realizing what had just happened kicked in.

You didn’t know what was worse: the fact you had a full front view of the giant’s junk or that he body-slammed you onto the ground and caused you to land on top of the painting worth 30% of your final grade.

You wanted to scream your head off. The paint had finally dried, and you could finally leave the studio at two in the morning. It was close to finals, and pretty much anyone on campus who didn’t get accepted because of their daddy’s bank account was in their dorms. You had hoped that this fact would mean that the paths were empty and, therefore, safe to transport your 30” x 40” canvas.

“SORRY!”

You shot your head up to locate the person who just apologized. Lo’ and behold, it was the same plastered, pasty cunt with a bird’s nest disaster of a haircut drunken idiot who decided it was a good idea to go streaking across campus. His only other distinguishable features were that he was at least 6’3” and that he had a small steel piece pierced on his face.

After the “apology,” he and his friend continued running off to God’s knows where in the dead of night—leaving you behind on the lawn with a bleeding nose, bruised knees and palms, and an oil painting that was torn and caked in mud three days before its deadline.

There was no way to redo it. The project was assigned at the beginning of October. It took 5 hours to set up the models with the motifs and lights, 3 hours to take pictures, and 10 hours to underdraw the preliminary sketch. You didn’t even want to think about the sheer number of sleepless nights you spent in the studio mixing colors and layering. On top of that, you also had your other finals in other courses to study for.

You had practically been living in that studio for the past month. All of the custodians and security guards knew you by name. You got first dibs every day when they refilled the vending machines. It was a true godsend when you didn’t have time to visit the dining halls. Everyone had been so kind and sweet to you. It was a warm welcome compared to the snark and snobbery you experienced from most of your classmates.

Crying from the devastation of the loss of your situation, your shaking legs carried your body and what remained of your work into the building. You knew that your professor stayed in her office late for grading. You could only hope that she would sympathize with your pitiful appearance.

“Wait, so did you get the extension?”

Lifting your head from the sticky library table at Bodleian’s, you stared at your best only friend, Michael Gavey, with a blank stare. You didn’t react to his wince after he took in your haggard appearance. You didn’t need a mirror to know that you looked terrible.

Your eyes were puffy and bloodshot red with dark mulberry bags underneath them. You had paled since coming to dreary England, but now you looked straight-up sickly. And if that wasn’t enough, your eyes had less life than a dead fish rotting at a Sunday Market.

Your voice was so meek that you were sure he had to strain to hear you.

“Yeah…I got it.”

You knew you had no choice but to beg your Studio Arts professor for an extension. But it killed you doing it. Professor Daria Martin was your favorite teacher and the only faculty member who actually liked you. Her support toward you meant everything to you; the last thing you wanted to do was disappoint her, let alone be the reason why she lost her job.

Your usually so snarky four-eyed friend perked up at the news.

“So, is everything okay?” he asked with hope.

Your head fell on neon-yellow ink-stained pages that filled the paperweight your ethics professor called a textbook. A bitter laugh fell from as your lips lifted to a wry, dry grin.

“Oof, not that simple, is it?” he asked.

“Is it ever?”

“So what do you have to do now?”

“Well-,” you lifted your head to take a deep breath as you started to explain, “- I still have the photos and copies of the sketch. But because the canvas was so large, it was special-ordered. That means I need to wait until another one can be delivered, and since all the works need to be completed in the studio, I can’t leave the campus.”

As you finished your explanation, Michael nodded his head in understanding before he paused, and a look of devastation painted his features.

“Wait, so does that mean-”

“I won’t be able to fly back home for the holidays.”

Fuck, you were about to cry again. You had been so excited to see your old friends and family. You remembered how absolutely homesick you were at the beginning of the term. Because you were a scholarship student from America, your parents encouraged you to settle on campus by moving to your dorm earlier than everyone else. It was bad enough that you missed Thanksgiving, but you had really set your heart on coming home for Christmas and New Year’s. What made it worse was that your parents had told you all about the dinner they had planned for your homecoming. It was going to be a feast of all your favorites.

English food sucked balls.

Your only saving grace was the Crunchie bars Michael got for you when you studied together or when you had to rewrite edit his essays.

You really DID cry after first reading his essay for Introductory English class at the beginning of the year.

“Did you try to report it?”

“Report what? ‘Hey, there’s a wasted asshole running naked across campus, and he body-slammed me to the ground and tore my fucking massive campus that blocked my view of the jackass. He’s probably richer than the goddamn Queen, given how he’s wasted right before finals.’”

“Do you have any description of him?”

“He’s a giant with a small eyebrow piercing, and his fat ass looked like it had never seen the sun.”

Without lifting your head, you heard the scrape of Michael’s chair before he walked across the table to sit in the chair next to you.

“Hey,” he began, bringing you into a warm arm hug, “it’ll be okay. You called your parents about it, right?”

“Yeah -” you sighed before continuing, “- they told me they understood and would Skype me daily.”

“See! Everything’s going to be – wait, did you say that this guy was tall?”

Furrowing your brow in confusion, you looked at your friend at the change in his tone from light and supportive to sharp and interrogative.

“Yeah?”

“How tall?”

“Umm,” you had to think about that, “I’d say he was about 6’3” or above? He was really fucking tall.”

“And he had an eyebrow piercing?”

Ok, now you were really confused. “Yes? Michael, where are you going with this?”

“I think the guy who ran you over was Felix Catton.”

You shot your favorite idiot with a deadpan glare.

“Felix Catton? The same Felix Catton who just so happens to be the same Felix Catton you hate?”

Michael solemnly nodded. “It’s him. It has to be. The only person on campus as tall as him is his cousin, and he doesn’t have piercings.”

“And he’s black.”

“Yeah, that too.”

You were skeptical, and it showed. You didn’t want to callously dismiss your friend, but you knew more than anyone how much his hatred for Oxford’s Golden Boy could impair his judgment. You were by no means a fan of the guy, but accusing someone of anything they didn’t do just because your friend thought so went against your principles.

He grabbed your arm and dragged you to the bookshelf in front of the table where Felix and his groupies sat. Both of your books and bags were in your chairs, but you managed to keep your spiral notebook with you. It wasn’t hard to find them – they were the loudest table in the entire library. They also reeked of cigarettes and booze.

“See?” Michael hissed. “Giant, pale, and eyebrow piercing. It’s him!”

“Michael,” you softly groaned, “just because you hate Felix Catton doesn’t mean you can –”

An extremely shrill voice interrupted you.

“I can’t believe you and Farleigh actually ran around campus naked!”

A petite girl with full pink lips and dull red hair latched on the arm of the man of the hour. “It was so hot to watch!”

This girl has weird-ass tastes in guys.

“And then how you crashed into that dunce at Ruskin! Brilliant!”

Your blood ran cold while another one of Catton’s faceless droning puppets chimed in.

“God, what an idiot! It’s their own fault, anyway. Who the fuck walks in the middle of the walk path with a fucking big canvas in front of them?”

One of the lessons hammered into your skull young was never to move before you think. That lesson had saved you ten ways from Sunday. But this was not one of those times.

You’re pretty sure that you hear Michael calling out your name as you walk away from the shelf and towards the overcrowded table. Tunnel vision took over you as you made your way to the overgrown idiot who almost cost you your entire future.

Grabbing the back of his shirt collar, you dragged the 6’5” towering fool on his ass all the way outside. You finally let go when the two of you reached the back of the building that had no windows.

“Hey, what the fu –”

You didn’t let him finish as you brought your fist to hit him square in the face – and, fuck, did you relish the crunch that immediately followed your swing.

Fuck, was his head killing him.

Felix should have known better than to have gotten cross-faded last night, but Farleigh had practically goaded him to do it. It’s not like his cousin ever had to worry about his grades for any of his courses during finals – the little shit-starter had always been so fucking academically gifted.

He skipped pretty much all of his morning classes and barely made it to his afternoon schedule on time while completely zoning out the entire time.

If he bombs on all his finals, his dad was going to absolutely murder him. But chances were he and his mum were going to be too busy entertaining whichever new friend his mum brought in for shelter.

“You alright there, champ?”

Felix swiveled his head too quickly and immediately groaned in pain. The motion made his hangover even worse. Rubbing his eyes to try to soothe the pounding in his head, he slowly opened them to look at his cousin.

The slag didn’t have the decency to look even a little bit affected from last night’s event – the fucker. No, he was sitting there with all Cheshire grins and gleaming eyes while Felix was two seconds from heaving his guts out.

“Yeah, I’m alright, mate.” He replied in a tired groan.

“Must have been quite the night. Wonder if it had anything to do with that little cocktail you took from our sweet Annabel’s belly button?”

Disgust was clear on Felix’s face as he recalled the body shot he had taken from his ex-FWB’s navel. He truly must have been off his rocker last night – he thought he was over with body shots since graduating secondary, but apparently not.

If he somehow got an STD from doing it, V was going to kill him.

But even with all of his horrible actions that caused the raging war inside his skull, that wasn’t the main cause of his misery.

Farleigh’s grin dropped as judgment painted his features.

“Oh,” he moaned, “please tell me this isn’t about ‘your angel’ from last night.”

He didn’t just take the dare of streaking across the grounds just for the hell of it. He needed an excuse to pass through the art building – all for the chance of seeing you.

You. His angel of paints and books who lived in the empty studio rooms of Oxford University’s Ruskin School of Art and whose presence harangued him every hour of every day. Everywhere Felix went, he would unconsciously look for you.

It was his soul calling out for yours – he knew it.

Felix had never felt so drawn to another human being in his entire existence. He’d never seen you outside of the libraries, art building, and maybe the dining hall if he was lucky. You never went to any parties or even had a drink at the pub at King’s Arms. He didn’t even have classes with you, but he knew Farleigh did. Word was that you and his cousin had shared a few classes – what’s more was that you were likely the only person who could go head-to-head with him in academics.

And to make it worse, the prat refused to tell him anything about you – not even your fucking name.

“Believe me,” he told him after Felix had been begging his cousin for hours to share anything about you, “she is way above your league.”

Which really hurt his feelings, by the way – sure, you were probably way above in book smarts, but there wasn’t a girl that remained indifferent to his charms after a good talking fucking.

“I still can’t believe you won’t at least tell me her name,” Felix complained once more, “or even just give me her number!”

“She’s an American here on scholarship and a bore,” he quipped back, “what’s there to tell? And can you please shut up? I want to get some reading done before tonight. You do remember the in-class essay we have tomorrow, right?”

Bloody hell, he did not. Pushing down the bitter feeling in his chest, he and his cousin made their way to meet everyone at the back. As soon as he sat down, Annabel clung on to his arm. Thank fuck he had been wearing one of his thicker jumpers – otherwise, her claws that she called nails would have ripped open the fabric.

“Hey, Felix!” she made sure to offer a very generous sight of her cleavage, “are you ready for tonight?”

Felix chuckled lowly before responding. “Aren’t I always?”

And just like that – he completely zoned out the rest of the conversation.

Annabel was probably saying something to get him to notice her, and Farleigh was likely responding so he wouldn’t have to – but Felix couldn’t be bothered to pretend to care.

He was lost in the living daydream that was his angel that haunted the art studios of Ruskin School of Art.

He was desperate to learn everything about you.

If he asked you to talk about your favorite books, would your eyes sparkle in delight, or would your smile widen in glee?

If he grabbed your hand, would your palms feel marred by his rough skin, or would you press your callouses to his?

If he pressed his mouth on yours, would your lips feel as soft and plump as they look? Or was their luster forever damaged by your teeth biting them whenever you were in deep concentration?

If he breathed in your scent at the crook of your neck, would your skin smell like the paints forever on your brushes or the musky pages of heavy ancient books you always carried in your arms?

If he planted kisses from your throat to your breasts, would you mewl in pleasure or whimper in anticipation?

If he touched your cunt, would you arch your back in ecstasy? Or would your legs crumble, and you would have no choice but to sink into his arms?

Felix’s thoughts were rudely interrupted when Farleigh jammed his bony elbow into his ribcage and hurriedly whispered.

“Look alive, Golden Boy.”

Looking forward, it was better than any of his wet dreams combined. It was you.

Your hair was loose, and your fists were clenched. You reminded him of a ferocious lion goddess with how focused your gaze was on him.

But before Felix would prepare himself to make a good impression, you walked behind him and grabbed the back of his shirt collar before fucking dragging his ass out of his seat and outside.

Bloody hell, for someone so much shorter than him, you were fucking strong.

When you finally released your grip, he fell on the ground like an idiot before he tried to stand and steady himself as quickly as he could.

“Hey, what the fu –”

You didn’t let him finish as you brought your fist to hit him square in the face – and, fuck, you might have actually broken his nose.

After staggering back, you started using the spiral notebook in your other hand to land blow after painful blow on his body.

“YOU. STUPID. FUCKING. INGRATE –” Each word that left your mouth was emphasized with another hit from your notebook “– I. HATE. YOU. YOU. RUINED. MY. PAINTING. I. SPENT. SO. MUCH. TIME. ON. IT. AND. NOW. I. CAN’T. GO. HOME. FOR. BREAK. BECAUSE. OF. YOUR. STUPID. SELF!”

Felix was confident you had more to say, but you were pulled off him by your friend – he’s pretty sure it’s Mitchell – by the waist with you kicking and screaming out profanities to him as your friend called out your name to try to calm you down.

He wondered what it said about him if he told anyone how much you looked like an angry cat. His parents would send him to a shrink if he told them how adorable he found you right now.

If you were this wild while fighting, he could only imagine how riled up you would get in bed.

Fuck, you might have just unlocked a new kink in him.

Catching his breath as he watched your friend drag you away into the distance, he heard a slow clap to his left.

Farleigh was leaning on the corner – his smug expression making it clear that he had seen the whole thing – as he looked at his cousin with a bemused expression before walking toward him and giving a sympathetic pat on his back.

“Well,” he started to break the tension, “at least you know her name.”

“Yeah,” Felix agreed, “I know her name.”

And he knew that you smelled more like the paints on your brushes than the books you carried with subtle notes of gardenias.

Tagging: @aemondsbabe, @ethereal-athalia, @aphroditesmoon, @barbiedragon, @valeskafics, @lexyysworld, @punkiwiki, @saltburnedme, @arcielee

Let me know if you want to be tagged for future Saltburn fics!

[najia-cooks]

[ID: A greyish brown stew presented alongside flatbread, red pepper paste, green peppers, and carrot sticks. End ID]

سماقية / Summagiyya (Gazan stew with chard, chickpea, sumac, and 'lamb')

Summagiyya (سُمَّاقِيَّة; also translitered "sumagiyya", "sumaghiyyeh" or "sumaqiyya") is one of the signature dishes of the Gaza strip, in particular Gaza City. It consists of lamb, chard, and chickpeas in a sumac-infused broth; savor and zest is added by a dagga of dill seeds, garlic, and peppers, and nutty depth by a generous drizzle of red tahina. The resulting stew is thick, earthy, and slodgily grey (due to the green chard and red sumac)—it also has the characteristic sourness of much Gazan cuisine.

Summagiyya is most often prepared during holidays, especially Eid al-Fitr; it's an excellent make-ahead dish for these occasions, since it's even better once its flavors have had time to meld and mellow overnight. It is served cold alongside fresh vegetables, and eaten by using flatbread to scoop up each bite. This recipe provides a spiced seitan recipe to replace the lamb, but you may also use any lamb or beef substitute of your choice.

Today, summagiyya is often prepared with Israeli white tahina, as decades of punitive import laws, taxes, and restrictions have enforced Palestine's status as a consumer, rather than an producer, of food products. Israeli tariffs on, and confiscations of, Palestinian goods have forced those tahina factories that survived to import sesame seeds rather than using locally grown crops, even as they export the best of their product to Israel. The dubbing of foods such as tahina and hummus as culturally "Israeli" cuisine works to hide this exploitative relationship, and cement an Israeli national identity through the subsuming and erasure of Palestinian existence. It is for this reason that Emad Moussa writes that Palestinian cuisine has a role in "protecting against a people's very extinction."

Medical Aid for Palestinians (MAP) has put out an urgent call for donations to provide medical supplies to Palestinian hospitals when supply lines reopen. Also contact your representatives in the USA, UK, and Canada.

Ingredients:

For the soup:

500g (2 large bunches) chard (شلق), diced

80g Levantine sumac berries (Rhus coriaria)

1/2 cup soaked and boiled chickpeas, mostly cooked (40g dry / scant 1/4 cup)

1/4 cup red tahina

1/2 cup (60g) all-purpose flour

1 large yellow onion

1/4 cup olive oil

1 tsp kosher salt

2 cardamom pods (optional)

2 allspice berries (optional)

More olive oil, to fry

Sumac berries can be found in the spice section of a halal grocery store. If you're unable to locate whole berries, pre-ground will do.

For the dagga:

1 1/2 Tbsp dill seeds

5 cloves garlic

1/2 green cubanelle pepper

2-3 dried red chilis (optional)

1/2 tsp black pepper

1/4 tsp cumin

Dill seeds may be found at a halal, south Asian, or speciality European grocery store. They are commonly used in Indian food and as a pickling spice. At a south Asian grocery store they may be labelled soyo, suva, shepu, or savaa.

For the lamb:

1 cup (120g) vital wheat gluten, aka gluten flour

1/2 Tbsp ground sumac

1/2 tsp ground caraway

1 tsp onion powder

1 tsp Palestinian 7-spice

1/2 tsp garlic powder

1/2 tsp sea salt

1/2 tsp ground black pepper

1/2 tsp ground cumin

1/2 tsp ground aniseed

1/2 tsp turnermic

1 tbsp olive oil

1/2 tsp soy sauce

1 tsp miso paste

2 cloves garlic, grated

2 tsp pomegranate molasses

1 Tbsp white or red tahina

About 1/2 cup vegetarian 'beef' stock from concentrate, or vegetable stock

Pomegranate molasses is simply pomegranate juice that has been reduced to a thick consistency. It may be found in the sauces section of a halal grocery store.

Instructions:

For the soup:

1. Soak dried chickpeas in cool water overnight, or in just-boiled water for an hour. Drain and re-cover with water, and boil for 30-45 minutes, until almost fully cooked. Drain and set aside.

2. Simmer sumac seeds in enough water to cover by a couple inches for about an hour, until the water is dark red. Blend the seeds and water together, then strain the mixture through a cheesecloth.

If you're using ground sumac, skip the blending step. Use a cheesecloth or very fine metal sieve (such as one intended for brewing tea) to remove the ground spice from the water.

3. Whisk the flour into the sumac-infused water.

For the lamb:

1. Combine all dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl. Add wet ingredients other than stock and stir briefly. Add enough stock to produce a soft, smooth dough.

2. Knead by hand on a clean surface, or put in a stand mixer with paddle attachment on medium-low, for about 5 minutes. You should see stringy strands begin to form in the dough.

3. Allow to rest, covered, for 5-10 minutes to encourage gluten formation. Knead for another 3 minutes. Do not over-knead.

4. Tear the dough into bite-sized pieces.

Stringy seitan being pulled apart into pieces.

You may also shape the dough into a slab and cube it with a sharp knife—the lamb or beef used in summagiyya is usually cubed—but I prefer the texture of torn seitan to sliced.

5. Steam the seitan pieces for 10 minutes in a bamboo steamer or using a metal steamer basket. Place the bamboo steamer in the bottom of a wok and cover its base by about 1/2" (1 cm), then raise the heat to boil the water; lower the heat to keep the water at a simmer. If using a steamer basket, place it over the opening of a pot containing a couple inches of water and bring it to a simmer. Start the timer when the water begins simmering.

6. Heat olive oil on medium-high and sear the steamed seitan pieces, turning as necessary, until deeply browned on all sides. Set aside.

Fried seitan pieces.

You can save a step here by searing the raw seitan, then returning it to the pot after you've fried the onions to simmer it rather than steaming. I found that this produced a mushier texture.

For the dagga (دقة):

1. Grind cumin and black pepper thoroughly in a mortar and pestle, then add dried red pepper and dill seed and crush coarsely. Add green sweet pepper and garlic and pound until a coarse mixture forms.

Dill seeds, green sweet pepper, garlic, and dried red chili on a cutting board, alongside dagga in a large granite mortar.

You may also use a spice mill or food processor.

To assemble:

1. Chop the onion. Wash the chard and slice it thinly in one direction; turn it ninety degrees and slice thinly again.

Diced chard, fried seitan, dagga, and sumac-infused water with flour.

2. In a large pot, heat a couple tablespoons of olive oil on medium. Fry chopped onion, cardamom pods, and allspice berries for a minute until fragrant. Add half of the dagga and fry until fragrant.

3. Add chard and fry, mixing often, until wilted.

Wilted chard in a wok.

4. Add sumac mixture, chickpeas, and water to cover. Bring to a boil, then lower heat to a simmer. If you didn't steam your seitan earlier, add it now.

5. Continue to stir and simmer until the stew is thick, homogenous, and greyish-brown, about 15 minutes.

Simmered stew.

6. Add the remainder of the garlic mixture, the red tahina, a pinch of ground cumin, the 1/4 cup olive oil, and salt to taste. Return the steamed and seared seitan to the pot and mix.

Serve cool with flatbread, sweet green peppers, bitter green and black olives, carrots, leafy greens, and/or pickles.

[starryeyeesworld]

Veggies mealspø moodboard 🥦✨️

(As per the results from the poll I made 💚 I'm not sure this turned out the way I wanted it but it's cute so here you go)

Recipes

1) Just having plain uncooked veggies as snack is so nice (especially crunchy vegetables). Even if you add a simple dip it doesn't add too many c@ls!

Recipe for tztziki

You add in a bowl low fat greek yoghurt, grated cucumber, diced dill, diced garlic, a bit of olive oil and salt and you mix it (you can add mint too)

(A recipe for hummus is a bit harder but if you want it dm me and I'll try my best to explain)

2) Cucumbers or tomatoes on a rice cake with a little bit of light cream cheese 😋

3) vegetable soup

Veggie soup is actually pretty easy to make. Just cut veggies of your choice (carrots, onions, broccoli, celery, green beans). Lightly soute the veggies in a little bit of oil (its good to add them one by one starting from the one that needs to cook for longer to othe once that need less cooking). Then add some veggie broth (if possible low sodium one) and boil until ready.

4) Salad

Literally so easy but delicious and so filling. I usually just put a little bit of olive oil, salt, and lemon juice and it's soo good. Leafy greens, tomato, cucumber, and raw onion 😋 (you can add a few cubes of low fat feta cheese as well)

5) boiled or souted veggies (Brocoli, carrots) on top of rice is so nice as well, and so quick to prepare and easy to meal prep!

I hope this is somewhat helpful to at least one person~ 💚

I'm not sure how this post turned out but I tried my best~

If something in my explanation is unclear, you could always dm me or ask in the comments!!

[lotstradamus]

do you have some favourite go-to recipes? i would love any of your recommendations!! xx

we eat the same few things on rotation in our house, as I do all the cooking, and I like a) one-pot meals, and b) pasta, preferably. most of these are fairly low effort but you get a lot of bang for your buck flavour-wise, and they're endlessly customisable!

also, listen, I don't do measurements. follow your heart and taste as you go.

the tiktok viral baked feta pasta from like 4 years ago ingredients: plum or cherry tomatoes, a block of feta (or boursin if you're feeling flush), garlic, pasta optional extras: spinach, cannellini beans, chili crisp recipe: whack your tomatoes, sliced garlic, and olive oil in a big dish. nestle your feta in there. I like to add a tin of drained cannellini beans at this point to bulk it out/cut down on the pasta/make the texture confusing, but you don't have to. stick it in the oven at like 180-200C for half an hour ish. after half an hour boil your pasta. retrieve your oven dish, stir everything up to desired consistency (I'm a chunk girl). you can add spinach while you do this for extra greenery, or a massive spoonful of chili crisp for heat and crunch, but it's good on its own. add the pasta and some pasta water if you need. voila. you simply cannot go wrong.

gochujang and hummus pasta ingredients: gochujang (this keeps forever in the fridge so it's a good kitchen investment), a tub of hummus, garlic, white onion, parm optional extras: parsley recipe: chop onion and garlic, sling them in a pan with butter and a splash of EVOO. when the onion is sufficiently sweaty and nice, add a dollop of gochujang (the bigger the dollop the spicier the end result) and stir it all in, followed by the whole tub of hummus. boil the pasta. add the cooked pasta to the pan, along with some pasta water, a shit load of grated parm, and garnish with parsley. my friend sent me a vegan version of this recipe about a year ago and I've made the non-vegan version roughly once a week since. it is so fucking delicious. butter bean thing ingredients: butter beans, garlic, red onion, tomato paste, cream/double cream/greek yog, lemon, sourdough/nice crusty bread optional extras: parsley recipe: throw chopped garlic and onion in a pan with butter and EVOO and really let them sweat it out. add tinned butter beans WITH THE JUICE. yes, I know. add in a few good squirty piles of tomato paste and stir, then let it all heat through. at this point start toasting your crusty bread of choice because I ALWAYS forget until the end and then I'm rushed. I recommend splurging for the good bread, slathered with melty butter. add whatever creamy thing you have to hand (the og recipe I saw said double cream, but I usually have greek yoghurt in and that does the job) to the beans, along with some lemon juice, garnish with parsley if you like and serve. use the bread as a giant spoon. you are welcome.

sausage soup/stew? casserole?? ingredients: celery, white onion, carrot, sausage/s, cherry tomatoes, tinned tomatoes, chicken broth, parm optional extras: creamy thing of your choice, spinach, orzo recipe: dice the celery, carrot and onion (mirepoix!), and throw it in a big big big pot with some EVOO. now: I get a pack of nice sausages and either mash or chop them depending on how much energy I have, but if you live somewhere with a butcher or whatever you can save your mashing arm and just get ground sausage. throw in the ground, mashed, or chopped sausage and cook for a bit. follow with a tin of chopped tomatoes and chicken broth. I usually put in about a litre. chop the cherry toms and toss them in. follow with a load of grated parm. if you have any parm rinds, throw em in and leave it to bubble away. this doesn't sound like much but it is so good. the longer you leave it the more flavourful it will be! towards the end I like to add in whatever creamy thing is in the fridge (double cream, greek yog, milk), along with lots of chopped spinach and a cup of orzo to really bulk it up. we can happily live on this for DAYS, especially if we have leftover fancy crusty bread from the gochujang pasta. oh and remember to take out the parm rind.

thai chicken curryish ingredients: chicken (thigh/breast), garlic, ginger, yellow peppers, spring onion, cashew nuts, rice, coconut milk, chicken broth optional extras: sriracha, coriander recipe: I love this one cos it is SO quick and SOOOO easy. cut chicken into chunks and brown it in the pot. whip it back out and throw in the chopped garlic and ginger (I have a tube of ginger paste in the fridge cos WHO has the time?) with a big glug of EVOO, then a cup of rice. jasmine works, but I've also used risotto rice. toss in the chopped peppers, spring onion and cashew nuts (if I have the energy I'll chop the nuts, but you can put em in as-is), then add coconut milk (a tin's amount, be that an actual tin or some of the melted stuff that costs 1/4 of the price - thanks Asian supermarket!) and chicken broth. put the browned chicken back in, give it all a stir, cover it, and stick it in the oven for like 25ish mins. here’s the NYT recipe if you need liquid measurements/an actionable recipe that isn’t me riffing. (as always, 12ft.io/ in front of the address to bypass the paywall.) serve it with sriracha squirted all over it (HIGHLY RECOMMEND) and coriander if you like it.

delicious little rice waffle ingredients: leftover jasmine rice, chili crisp, an egg, kewpie mayonnaise, sesame oil, spring onion, A WAFFLE MAKER optional extras: furikake recipe: full disclosure, you need a little waffle maker for this. mix the rice with chili crisp, a little sesame oil, and egg yolk. dollop it into the waffle maker and cook. garnish with kewpie mayo, sliced spring onion and some furikake if you have it, or just toasted sesame seeds if you have those, or neither! delicious little spicy umami snack, my beloved.

tuna melt of dreams ingredients: you know what's in a tuna melt recipe: swap the butter on the outside of the bread for kewpie mayonnaise and thank me later.

ADDENDUM: this goes without saying for me but sadly I know it does not for everybody: SEASON YOUR FOOD WITH SALT. IT WON'T MAKE YOUR FOOD SALTY IT WILL MAKE IT DELICIOUS. COOK YOUR PASTA IN SALT. WHEN IN DOUBT, ADD SOME SALT. THANK YOU.

[evansboyfriend]

blonde or brown?

i woke up from my ill-advised late afternoon nap to see the discord girlies were talking about buck's hair colour and insisting it's brown. so i had to set the record straight

first things first: to judge the true colour of your hair, it needs to be dry and free from product (unless it dries with your hair like certain oils and serums, but let's not get into that right now) and you need to look at it under a light - natural light preferably, but artificial will do trick. and obviously, it needs to be virgin hair that's not been dyed.

(yes, some charts go up to 11 and 12, but let's stay away from bleach-blonde shades for the purposes of this post, yes?)

so i'm trying to find pictures of oliver stark in a setting with good lighting to match his level with the chart above

not sure what year this is from, google credits "2019 Arnold Jerocki" (it does look like s2-s3 buck?)

but this one's definitely recent (7x04 which was filmed in 2024!)

and the most recent BTS of oliver from that video abc posted on instagram (i took a screenshot from this gifset by @rylivers)

so

first photo (from 2019) looks like a level 8: blonde

second photo i would say is level 7: medium blonde. (at most it's level 6: dark blonde)

third photoset: this one i'm including to show the difference where the sun is hitting the hair vs when it's not. overall it looks like his current hair is at the 6-7 level.

moving on...

"maybe buck had blonde hair in s1-2 but then it got darker so he's brunet now" is that it? or...

is it possible that oliver has been dyeing his hair for some time to hide greys? they're visible in this (zoomed in) pic (from his instagram)

i cant find any other photo where you can see the greys, so i'm inclined to believe the hair is being dyed to cover it. and not sure if this is a personal choice or something the hair&makeup department are instructed to do to keep him looking young (because god forbid a 32 year old has greys, i guess?! welcome to TV land). also, i'm not a professional colourist, but they may have gone a level or two darker to cover the greys.

in conclusion,

oliver's - and therefore buck's - natural hair would be classed as blond. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

PS. before anyone @'s me: yeah, yeah, ginger undertones, i hear you. here, i'm mentioning it as acknowledgment. i have nothing else to say on that because it's related to tint, not level. cheers.

[bornagainmurdock]

ice cream // matt murdock

A new ice cream shop had popped up just outside of Matt's apartment. It was one of those shops with a rotating menu, and a dozen of the weirdest ice creams the shop employees could fathom.

It had been over two weeks since you and Matt had gone on a proper date, something that you promised to do once a week as a vow to make time for one another. It was your turn to plan, so you scheduled the day and time making sure Matt was availible, but not the place. This is where the new ice cream shop could come in handy.

"Can you read the menu to me again? I can't decide between a few of them." Matt was facing you, feeling you scan the menu over and over.

You had walked Matt here after he got off from work and decompressed for a bit. You didn't tell him where you were going until you stepped in the front door of the shop and he heard the silly pop music blasting on the speakers.

"Yah I can! Okay, vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, you know the regulars. Then for ice cream, there's an olive oil avocado ice cream, mango passion fruit, marshmellow and liquid smoke, blueberry banana, and red hots and sriracha. Then for the sorbets there is raspberry cotton candy, blackberry kale, juniper mint, and mint lemonade." Each one felt like a tongue twister.

"I feel more confused. Are there two you're deciding between?" Matt was smiling, knowing this was the key to helping you decide your own choice.

"I have to know what the olive oil and red hots ones tastes like. How do those sound?" You said, leaning on Matt.

"Sounds great." He said before approaching the counter to order. He got you both one scoop in fear both would be too much if you got more.

Matt paid and you grabbed the bowls and spoons, leading him to a table to sit.

"First bites!" You said grabbing a small spoonful, Matt doing the same, to 'cheers' one another. "Ooo, Matty what do you think? I really like the olive oil one actually. Here have a bite."

You grabbed another spoonful and passed it to his lips.

"I think you're right, the olive oil is oddly really good. I didn't expect to like the red hot one this must either. Here."

He passed a bite to you as well, waiting for your mouth to find his spoon.

"Oh damn! I don't know how they made both of these weird flavors so good but we're coming back here regularly now."

"I concur." Matt said, giggling.

[lanasfavorite-daughter]

•°•Hot Girl Tips•°•

Hydrogen peroxide removes period stains

Rubbing alcohol and/or hand sanitizer removes nail polish

The amount of water you need to drink= your weight÷2, then that number÷8 so for example 100÷2=50÷8=6.25 so if you weigh 100 pounds you would need at least six 8oz glasses of water per day

Sugar wax>>> here's a recipe: 1 cup of white sugar, 1/4 cup of water, 1/4 cup of lemon juice (lime works too) combine the ingredients in a saucepan and let them boil until golden brown. The easiest way to test the wax is to have a small bowl of ice water and drop a little bit of the wax into it. When the wax is ready, you'll be able to roll it into a soft ball and it will keep its shape. When this consistency is reached, put it in a glass jar (make sure the jar isn't cold otherwise it will crack) and let it cool off for at least an hour. Once cool, apply it in the opposite direction of hair growth and wax awayyyy

Diy cuticle oil: olive oil and vitamin E oil. You could add a drop or two of essential oil if you want. The amount of oil you need depends on your container so for mine it was a tablespoon of olive oil and 1 teaspoon of vitamin E.

Diy dry shampoo: 3 parts cornstarch and 1 part baking soda.

Healthy drink to ease bloating and get in your vitamins and minerals: 1/2 cucumber, a few sticks of celery, kale or another dark green of your choice, lemon juice, turmeric (a little goes a long way) and ginger. Fresh is best but any ginger you have will work. Fill the blender to the max line with water, and blend until liquid. You can strain it if you want, but you don't have to. It doesn't taste great, but in the long run it is worth ittt

Smelling good is such a wonderful thing for so many reasons. First, pick a scent. Or at the very least a top 3 like I have: vanilla, Dior Blooming Bouquet, and Sol De Janeiro '68. I also use the classic scent from Soap and Glory (rose and bergamot). The first and most important thing is to find a good deodorant. Which one works for you depends on your body chemistry, but dove is always a safe bet :). Next, find a good shower routine. Having all of your shower products smell similar will keep the scent lasting longer. And, of course, shower at least every other day. Washing your hair is different bc your hair washing routine depends on your hair type. And of course you must find a body lotion that matches your other shower products.

Last and final tip for today: keep your nails and hands healthy and pretty by moisturizing your hands with hand cream. I like this one by Burts bees, this one from Eucerin, and this one from Dior (pricey I know but it's w o r t h itt).

That's it! Tysm

[thechadmaryy]

Senshi voice: First cut up 3 medium potatoes. You want very thin slices, so cut them a couple times in multiple directions. Rinse the cut potatoes, and cover them in 2 tablespoons of white vinegar. Mix together while dusting with your seasonings of choice. I used onion powder, carne asada, and elote seasoning. Cut half of a stick of butter in half, and toss both cubes onto the potatoes as they begin to cook on medium-high heat, starting the stove once the potatoes are already in the pan. Stir frequently, and add in a tablespoon of olive oil when the melted butter is as brown as the skin of a russet potato. Once you can sink your teeth into the thickest piece of potato without feeling any grit, throw in half a cup of cashews and continue to stir frequently. You're going to notice some burning on the side of your pan, so as you cook, periodically add a tablespoon of vinegar to the sides of the pan, up to three times to deglaze. Once your potatoes start to become soft, throw in a can of rinsed black beans. Pout in half of a cup of milk. Cook until the beans are easily mushed, adding more of your seasoning, salt, and another dash of vinegar if the dish isn't tangy. You can balance most meals by getting a proper ratio of salt, fat, and acid, so think about how the vinegar, seasoning, and butter or oil can be added if your dish's flavor skews too much in one direction. This is a good dish to feed the young'ns, but isn't particularly high in many vitamins and minerals. It's also high in fat and carbohydrates relative to protein, so consider serving it with something to make up for that, like chicken or available vegetables, or even a yogurt and fruit bowl after dinner. As for dungeoneering, it doesn't keep very well due to the milk and butter. For a less perishable alteration, try to bake the meal instead of frying it, and use only a tablespoon of oil or butter. Also make sure to add more salt and vinegar, so that it keeps longer, but it will be too strong if eaten alone.

[princess-of-thebes-1995]

Yandere Hannibal Lecter x Female Reader

Chapter Three: Pathetic Attempts

A frown graced on the handsome face of your ex Professor Hannibal Lecter. The thermometer said you still had a burning fever.

Lecter made you drink ice lemonade and cold soda.

He had no choice. Picking you up, bridal style, he walked up the stairs and to the fancy bathtub which was connected to his room.

Lecter already prepared the bath with cold water and scented oils. Gulping in nervousness, he set you down slowly on the surface of the water.

Your eyes opened and you squirmed at the low temperature of the water.

Firmly holding and looking at you. "Don't resist."

You were too scared to disobey the older man so you nervously sat down on the chilly tub and took a long breath.

That is where you realized. You were naked! You covered your breasts and blushed. Out of the corner of his eye, Lecter wanted to laugh but held a straight face. You were so cute when embarrassed.

Before he kidnapped you, he set up cameras in your bathroom and saw you bathe and change before many times. 

So, he wasn't new to you.

But, that didn't mean he was bored of you. He loved seeing you exposed. It was even better now since it was in love in person and he could see you up close. Your natural perky tits made him hot and horny.

Lecter felt his boner rise. He knew it was wrong and not appropriate now to take you. But, he was willing to wait. He could easily rape you and force you. But, he doesn't want you. He loves you. Lecter wanted you to submit yourself.

"We need to get your temperature down."

You didn't say a word and let your ex teacher get a bar of soap and rub you. 

After your bath, Lecter dressed you up himself. He dressed you in a weird attire. A long skirt made of cotton with ruffled edges. A green olive short sleeve t-shirt with striped socks.

You looked like a Mori Kei.

He had an odd taste in women you thought.

Luckily, you didn't return to the basement. He carried you to the dining table and sat you on the chair. The table spread looked professional. You saw Caviar, smoked salmon, a big bowl of salad, and wine.

But sadly, Lecter sat next to you instead of across in the head chair. "I decided to give you alcohol to ease your headache. Don't make me regret it. Behave." Lecter gave you a warning look.

Gulping, you said yes. 

Smiling in approval, Lecter loaded your plate. 

"Here you go, Darling." He stabbed a piece of salmon and held it to your plump red lips.

Fearfully, you took a bite. You loved it. You tasted lemon, paprika and other spices you never knew.

It was better than Red Lobster.

"Wow. This is delicious. You cooked this?" You peeked at him in curiosity.

Lecter was surprised at how well mannered you were. But, he didn't show it. He expected you to act bratty and give him attitude and cause another fight.

The look you gave him was so sweet and innocent. He wanted to coo and stroke your face.

Smiling, he nodded. "I am talented at cooking. Mostly meat. I don't cook desserts or bake much."

The whole dinner, you felt better after each bite. The meal was hearty. The medicine, bath, fresh and natural food healed you.

Now, you were good as new again. Hannibal noticed too. He felt relaxed knowing you will not die of illness. 

Once again, he carried you to the basement. This time, he tucked you in without the chain. You looked up at him. 

"Don't try anything stupid." He seemed to have read your mind. He leaned over to you and kissed you on your forehead. "Good night, sweet heart."

You blinked. "Good night." You whispered.

Lecter hid his glee. You were slowly accepting him. Soon, you will be all over him and be an official couple.

He knew the police were after you. But, since you are an adult, he can persuade you to say you ran away and the charges by your father will be dropped.

Life is finally going back to normal for Lecter. Normal as in going his way. 

[ianarovoices]

Two employees work together to cover some living meat with batter…

I write full stories sometimes, isn't that crazy? AND I narrate them in my sweet voice too!

Click play above for me to read it to you, or read it for yourself below.

Mind the tags! This is NOT soft vore like my usual content!

Full written story under the cut...

“Oh!”

The meat giggles, letting out a small laugh as the batter begins to cover its body. Lottie pours steadily, getting the batter all over. She always starts by covering the midsection of the meat, then going lower, and finally back up and even higher to the face, sealing the meat’s eyes shut with a mix of uncooked dough and olive oil. Something about not being able to see usually makes ‘em a bit more scared of what’s about to happen. So, by now, she’s done this long enough to know to save that for last.

“She’s pretty happy about this,” says the new guy, looking over all confused as he continues to rotate the skewer. His motions have slowed a bit, too.

“They always are,” is her only reply. She narrows her eyes. “Also, ‘it’, not ‘she’.”

Before he can protest, she barrels on. “Now, make sure you’re rotating that skewer nice and steady. Otherwise, the batter won’t go  on evenly.”

“Ack, sorry!” He speeds up, and now his rotations are even once again.

Lottie smiles. “Great, thank you…uh…” Her brows furrow in confusion as she begins to cover the meat’s legs. “What was your name again?”

“It’s—”

“Actually nah, don’t tell me.” She laughs. “If you’re still here in a week, then I’ll be sure to get your name then.”

He opens his mouth to counter this, but then, wisely, decides to say nothing.

“Good choice,” she mutters under her breath, before beginning to cover the top of the meat with batter. As expected, when she pours batter and a bit of extra oil over the meat’s closed eyes, it begins to squirm just a bit. “It’ll be a little wriggly as we finish up here,” Lottie explains to the new guy, quickly pouring the last of the batter, “but it’s all covered now.

“And the finishing touch…” She grins, reaching onto the nearby counter for an apple, placing it daintily it in the meat’s mouth. “There we go…!” she proclaims triumphantly, dousing the apple with oil and a sprinkle of spices. “Put it in the frier, and it’ll be ready in, at most, half an hour.”

She turns to the new guy. “You’ll have to keep an eye on it, ok?” She told him this during the new hire initiation, but it really bears repeating. “You never really know how much body fat is on meat like this, so it’s really important to watch while it cooks, see how close it is to being done.

He nods. “Yep, got it,” he says. Though she definitely saw how his eyes glazed over as she repeated the instructions…

But she doesn’t acknowledge it. Lottie only watches silently as he lifts the skewer up, carrying the meat to the frier. Hopefully he really does “got it”. If he doesn’t, well…!

She licks her lips. Punishing the new hires is always a fun time.~

[siena-sevenwits]

A Nice Meal For When You Can Chop But Can't Think

If you can chop vegetables right now but don't have brains for a lot of measuring and planning, here's an easy and absolutely delicious stir-up. It's the best when I'm tired, and it's so savoury and umami.

Get yourself carrots, celery, a bell pepper, onion, mushrooms, and tomatoes. Chop up as much as you want, following your heart. Fry in a bit of olive oil, high heat at first, then turning it down when you think it might be a good idea to do so.

(Putting the onions, celery, and carrots in first and chopping up the rest while they get a headstart seems to go well, but you do you. Do what your brainless head can handle.)

Finally, crush and chop some garlic and add in. Put in herbs of your choice and some soy sauce. I also like chopping up fresh green onions. But use what you have.

BUT IF YOU WANT IT TO BE AMAZING -

Put in the garlic and herbs, but instead of the soy sauce, chop some bacon and splash some red wine. It's beautiful, and homey, and though it's not a ratatouille it will make you feel like this guy:

[ask-the-little-italian]

My thoughts on some of the nations ^_^

Spain: Smells like tomatoes and olive oil 24/7, I remember the pope almost having a heart attack with big brother Spain's outfit choices

Prussia: Holy Rome's big brother so that makes him my big brother too. Although he and Mr. Austria don't get along, and I heard he has an eye for miss Hungary. . .

France: Won't give me back my paintings, though I do like his own art. . And he looks like he'd be a sculpture model for an artist

My parents ＼⁠(⁠^⁠o⁠^⁠)⁠／

Austria: Mr. Austria is so bossy, I don't like having to wake up at 6 am to sweep the floors. He has good piano skills, though I want to learn to actually play and not just dust his piano. .

Hungary: Miss Hungary is so strong, like Grandpa Rome! If we're being honest, she's more of the husband in the relationship than Mr. Austria. And she's given me so much dresses. . . I wonder if the other countries still think I'm a girl

[elinaline]

boy listen to me here is what you're gonna do. You're gonna take a stainless steel pan. You're gonna pour a generous amount of olive oil in it. You're gonna slice thinly some garlic or whichever allium is your favorite and put it in there. You're gonna add some chili flake, some Espelette if you're gourmet, some paprika. Then you're going to go and cut yourself a generous slice of good bread. Bread that has a crunchy crust and that smells delicious. While your allium and herbs are lightly frying in your olive oil. When it smells good you're gonna dump your bread slices in there too, until it's soaked up all the oil and it's gotten a beautiful golden brown color on the pan side. Then you're going to plate it and put cheese of your choice on it while it's still warm, like slices of mozzarella or shredded comté. You hear me boy ? You want it greasy and crunchy and smelling delicious and flavorful. Then hear me out that's the most important part. You're gonna take a huge bite out of it and enjoy the half melted cheese with fresh olive and herbs and allium taste. Do it boy. Do it now.

[cherrirui-official]

Friendlocke Violet Gijinkas (Part 2/7)

PART 2 BAYBEE WAHOOO!! Three more gijinka designs comin right up!

I plan on posting them in order by groups of three, so there’s gonna be seven parts in total, all of which I’ll be linking here when done vvv

(Part One) (Part Three) (Part Four) (Part Five) (Part Six) (Part Seven)

!! These will contain personal headcanons I have for the cast, little fun facts, and also spoilers for Friendlocke Violet (for both the edited vids and the streams) This also contains a small amount of blood on one of the images!!

@saltydkart-reblogs

And that’s pretty much it, designs under the cut!

JOE:

The reason Joe dislikes most bird pokemon such as fletchling is because they're always stealing and pecking at the olives he... or well more specifically his company grows.

Speaking of which, they own a large plot of land which is used specifically to grow olive trees, which of course are used to make the olive oil he sells. What? Did you think that the olives come from Joe themselves? Of course not silly, welcome to capitalism.

That being said, Joe DOES know how to garden. When they first started their olive oil company they had to grow their own olive trees. Nowadays, in their spare time, they'll sometimes be found tending to the olive trees in their company's garden.

His crown is personally tailored for Joe and Joe ONLY. Crafted with the shiniest gold and the richest olives, all fit for a king! Somehow it never falls of his head. (Fun fact: the points are made to look like olive oil bottles)

Joe needs glasses but usually wears contacts when in public. Not that they look bad with glasses, it's just a personal choice.

Joe LOVES being involved in... well, anything! As long as it's not weird or sexual or illegal (that last one counts UNLESS it involves scamming others into buying his oil products), he is more than happy to invite himself into whatever is going on around him. What are you going to do? Stop him? Oh please!

HANNAH Ü:

At the start of her career, she would spend her days doing her own one-man (or.. well... woman) shows at subway stations, telling stories and entertaining other pokemon and people alike while they waited for the next train to arrive.

Her hat and cape are made entirely of salt! She is able to transform her cape and hat into different shapes and usually used this ability of hers to make stuff such as accessories, hats, and props that fit the role she's donning at the time.

Hannah LOVES collecting stickers and often wears them proudly on her body (in her poke form ofc ofc). However, she usually has to get someone else to stick them onto her bc of her lack of actual hands.

Some of her improv roles are inspired by the people she meets while others are inspired by pieces of media she's interested in at the moment.

Will ABSOLUTELY learn a new language if she needs to for a role. Duolingo speedrun world record

MYKYIE:

As stated previously, Mykyie used to be a circus performer before he quit to pursue his dreams. His most popular act involved him spinning plates on a stick while standing on a ball.

^^^ Because of this, he also has really, REALLY good balance.

Mykyie always keeps his Miku glowsticks on him, even when not attending any of her concerts.

"Anger Point" is basically an uncontrollable form of last resort whenever Mykyie is close to death but can still fight, it usually leads to him attacking whoever or whatever caused him great harm (In the instance of Lark, it was when he crit Mykyie and the ladder's health was extremely low.)

The Miku tattoo on Mykyie's arm was designed by Mykyie himself! However, it was drawn on him by an anonymous underground artist who went by many names to hide his true identity. The name that the artist went by at the time Mykyie got his tattoo was "Cl@ir33"

The cuffs and cape that he wears are... well, WERE, red. An unknown force seems to be slowly turning them into a shade of blue.

And that's all the HCs for now! Next Gijinka batch will consist of GrAce, Braidy, and Christene's

Also here's the posterless version of Joe's Gijinka bio before I go