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redgillan · 4 years

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Under Pastel Skies - 11

Sugar daddy!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Modern!AU Bucky doesn’t need anyone, especially not a sugar baby. He isn’t that desperate… but she smiles so sweetly and she’s endearingly awkward, and he’s so lonely. She’s an artist, a painter, the type of person who always puts others before herself. Throwing caution to the wind Bucky offers her a place to live, a place where she can finally paint whatever her heart desires. He doesn’t need much in return; a friend, a muse.

Word Count: 6,696

Warnings: Unprotected Sex (non explicit)

A/N: And finally... Just a word before, and it’s important, I wanted to put the explicit between two ‘*’ but I settled for one at the end because explicit means different things to different people. So whenever it starts to get too steamy for you, skip to the *. Thank you for reading, I appreciate your support!

Wannabe sugar daddies, don’t interact with this post.

Bucky moved behind the kitchen counter when he heard the door close. You and your guests were in the hallway where you took their coats and asked them to remove their shoes. He took a deep breath to calm himself. He had to stay calm, you depended on him tonight.

“It smells nice in here. What did y-”

Bucky straightened himself up and tried to keep a casual, friendly smile on his face as he came face-to-face with Okoye. He had seen enough pictures of your siblings to recognize them.

She looked surprised to find someone else there. He raised his hand and waved, and she frowned at him in confusion. The rest of the guests stopped short when they saw him waving like a dork. You pushed through them and came to his side.

“Guys, this is my friend, Bucky,” you said. “He’s the one who invited you.”

“Thanks for the invite. I hope you like wine,” Scott said, extending his hand as he walked over to Bucky.

“I sure do.”

Then he shook Wanda and Okoye’s hands, telling them how good it was to finally meet them. Your sisters introduced him to their partners, W’Kabi and Edwin who preferred to be called ‘Viz’.

You led them to the living room while Bucky prepared the drinks. W’Kabi decided to stay behind and help Bucky carry the drinks to the living room. He praised Bucky for having such a nice home.

The conversation seemed to flow easily between your siblings, though as Bucky arrived with your drink, he couldn’t help but notice that you were not participating. You took the glass from his hand, smiled then went back to staring at the coffee table. He sat next to you and rubbed soothing strokes on your arm before he reached for his drink.

Okoye was telling everyone that she had decided to return to New York after King T’Chaka’s passing. His son carried the mantle of the Black Panther, surrounding himself with his father’s Dora Milaje, but Okoye wanted to live closer to her own family.

She was a Dora Milaje, loyal to her king, but she was also a sister, loyal to her family. She felt like there were no good choices, and it ate away at her until her king found a solution to her problem. His little sister, Shuri, was starting her own business in the United States and needed her own bodyguards. Okoye accepted and W’Kabi followed her.

Scott didn’t share much. He showed everyone pictures of his little girl, Cassie, and said he was now working at Baskin-Robbins.

Wanda was evasive about her life and whereabouts. She told everyone that she’d been backpacking across Europe and met Viz, a wealthy businessman, on a beautiful sunny day in Berlin. They’d been attached at the hip ever since.

“And of course, you’re all invited to the wedding,” Wanda said while Okoye admired the ring. “It’s going to be a small wedding. I just need my family.”

“Excuse-me,” you said, standing up abruptly. “I think something’s burning.”

Bucky watched you disappear into the kitchen. He glanced at the group again, no one was paying attention so he followed you into the kitchen.

He found you leaning back against the counter, your arms crossed over your chest, staring into nothing. He walked over to you and pulled you into a one-armed hug that you accepted with a pleased sigh.

“I don’t think I can do this,” you said, your voice muffled against his shirt.

“Is it a code ‘flamingo’?”

“No,” you chuckled, pulling away. You took a deep breath and leaned back against the counter again. “It’s just...”

You huffed, unable to find the words and grabbed him by the waist, seeking his warmth again. Bucky let out a surprised laugh as you squeezed him tightly. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and pressed you against his chest.

“I know it’s hard,” he said, kissing the crown of your head. “It’ll be over soon, angel.”

Bucky rocked you side to side in a slow, soothing rhythm until you were practically melting against him. He felt you take a deep breath, your nose buried in his chest. He didn’t want the moment to end, but you’d been gone for several minutes now, and the others would barge in the kitchen soon.

He pressed a long kiss to your forehead and gently pushed you away, his arm falling to your waist. You smoothed out the wrinkles you had made in his shirt without looking him in the eye.

He could tell you were thinking about something but before he could ask what was on your mind, you kissed the slight cleft in his chin and quickly moved away from him.

He smiled to himself, his heart beating a little faster.

You were transferring the dinner rolls from the pan to the basket when Scott poked his head into the kitchen. Bucky was still smiling to himself like a lovesick idiot.

“Everything okay?” Scott asked, taking a step closer to you. You turned to him and nodded. “It’s kinda weird, isn’t it?”

“What?”

“Seeing each other again after all this time.” He leaned his forearm on the counter next to you and smelled the bread. “Baby Wanda’s getting married. Did you know they flew me first class? And the hotel is incredible. I feel like a prince.”

“Viz seems very nice.”

“I can’t believe Wanda backpacked through Europe,” Scott scoffed. “She hates camping.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Bucky watched as Scott leaned closer and whispered in your ear. “Listen, I wanted to thank you for everything you did for me and for Cassie-” Bucky quietly left the two of you alone. It was a private conversation and he didn’t want to impose himself.

He finished setting the table, and soon everyone joined in. Bucky was sitting with his back to the kitchen, W’Kabi sitting next to him. You took a seat across from him, Wanda sitting next to you. Okoye sat next to Wanda, facing Scott, and Viz took a seat at the end of the table.

The food was good, and everyone complimented Bucky on his cooking skills. He said that you had helped him a lot, but you refused to take credit for chopping up a bunch of vegetables. You gushed about his cooking skills and his delicious recipes. It made them salivate just thinking about it.

“And your house is amazing,” Scott said with a dreamy look on his face. “A place like that...” he sighed, “that must have cost you an arm and a leg.” The whole room fell silent, and something that sounded like a foot hitting a shin made the table jump. “Ouch, why did yo- oh.”

Okoye was looking at him with the widest pair of eyes Bucky had ever seen. She looked furious and exasperated at the same time. The others stared at their plates as the uncomfortable silence grew.

Bucky glanced at you, not surprised to find you smirking. You knew he lived for moments like these, and you knew he already had the perfect comeback. As he watched you bit your lip, trying to contain a little giggle, he couldn’t help but love you even more.

“It was the original price but I’m a good negotiator,” Bucky said. “Only cost me an arm.”

W’Kabi was the first to laugh at his joke, then the whole table broke into fits of laughter. Scott looked equally amused and relieved.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t-”

“No problem,” Bucky cut him off.

“Can’t take you anywhere,” Okoye said with a smile and a shake of her head. She turned to Bucky as everyone calmed down. “So, Bucky, strange name, uh? What do you do for a living?”

“My name is James, Bucky’s just a nickname.” He wiped his mouth and set the napkin down. “I’m a writer.”

“A pretty good one, judging by your apartment.”

“I’m all right.” He shrugged. “Literally.” Scott snickered at the joke.

“He’s too modest,” you said. “His books are best sellers. They’re autobiographical, he’s very sincere and honest and funny. He has a way of making you laugh about things that are pretty awful.”

“Yeah, we saw that,” Wanda said with a grin. “Are you working on anything at the moment?”

Bucky shifted a little in his seat. “Yeah, it’s uh,” he cleared his throat. “It’s a very important one. I don’t really want to talk about it. Don’t wanna jinx it.”

He wasn’t going to tell your family that he was writing a book about how he fell in love with you. That’d be pretty awkward.

“I understand,” Okoye nodded, then looked at you. “You’ve been really quiet tonight.” You shrugged. “I thought you were still living with Natasha. Do you still work at the hotel? Where is it again? Chelsea? That’s one hell of a commute from Brooklyn.”

“I wasn’t exactly living with Natasha,” you said. “I was crashing on her sofa. And no, I quit six months ago. I’m a full time artist now.”

“That’s great,” Scott said, raising his glass toward you in a silent toast. “How’s that working out for you?”

“Not too bad. Bucky’s friend is a professional photographer. He helped me set up my website. The pictures he took are amazing. I sold a few pieces online but I’m struggling to find gallery representation.”

“Hey, as long as it pays the bills.”

“I don’t really have to worry about bills these days.”

“What do you mean?”

The room got quiet again, and Bucky could feel the tension in the air, buzzing like static electricity. All eyes were suddenly on you, waiting for an explanation. Bucky knew you were not going to lie to them. He locked eyes with you, and braced himself for impact.

You set your fork down and folded your hands in your lap.

“Well, Bucky and I have an arrangement.”

“I don’t like where this is going,” Scott cut you off.

“I’m not going to beat around the bush and I’m not going to use pretty words to make it sounds more appealing,” you continued as if you hadn’t heard him. “He’s my sugar daddy.”

“You’re joking. Please, tell me you’re joking.”

“Nope,” you replied smugly, popping the ‘p’.

A chorus of voices rose in protest. Okoye and Scott were shouting while the others kept glancing around wondering what had just happened. Wanda was strangely quiet next to you.

“Oh, shut up!” you shouted. “You left me alone. All of you. We were all grieving our brother but it doesn’t give you the right to fuck off when things get tough. Do you know how fucking terrifying it was when mom started to lose her memories? Or when the police drove her home at three in the morning after one of her spells? No, you don’t know because you weren’t there.”

Bucky had never seen you so upset before, and he didn’t quite know what to do but he felt like you needed to get it off your chest.

“I didn’t have friends or boyfriends. I went to class, then got home, hoping mom hadn’t set the house on fire. I took the first decent job I could find because she needed a new home and professional help. Without Natasha I would have been homeless.” You turned to Bucky. “I’m so sorry, I’ve ruined dinner. You’ve worked so hard.”

“It’s okay,” he replied immediately. “I’m with you.”

“God, you’re so nice,” you sighed, then turned to your siblings. “See? That’s the kind of person he is. I was lonely and lost, and I found him and he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. He’s kind and sweet, he’s selfless and generous, and you have no right to criticize our relationship.”

Bucky stared at you, his mouth hanging open a little. Slowly he shook himself out of his trance and reached for your hand on the table. He had no idea you thought so highly of him.

“We needed each other,” you continued. “And I don’t care what you think.”

Dinner was officially ruined but Bucky didn’t care. He smiled at you, soft and reassuring, and let go of your hand when you smiled back. He was proud of you for speaking up, for standing up for yourself.

Bucky noticed Wanda and Viz exchanging looks.

“Okay so, since we’re sharing truth bombs,” Wanda said, shifting a bit in her seat. “I wasn’t really traveling through Europe. I went to Sokovia and after that, everything’s kind of a blur. I did things I’m not proud of. I wanted to forget,” she paused and sighed, “everything. I hit rock bottom, pretty hard, and checked myself into a psychiatric hospital. That’s where I met Viz. He helped me send you those postcards. I screwed up, real bad, but I couldn’t tell you guys the truth. I’m not really proud of myself.”

“I got fired from Baskin-Robbins for yelling at a costumer.”

“Okay!” Okoye exclaimed in her big sister voice. “Enough truth bombs.” She pointed at you. “I’m sorry you had to do this alone, it wasn’t right but we’re here now and we won’t let you down. As for the sugar daddy thing... well you’re a grown woman, you can do whatever you want. Bucky seems like a nice guy.” She turned to Wanda. “We are all dealing with our pain in our own way. I’m not judging you. We’re here for you, Wanda.”

“I know,” Wanda said, sniffing.

“And Scott, stop yelling at people.”

“Yeah, good idea.”

Bucky turned to W’Kabi and Viz who looked proud of their girls, albeit a little uncomfortable with the whole situation. Someone started chuckling, he couldn’t tell who it was, but suddenly the whole table broke into a fit of laughter.

“How about some dessert,” he said. “Then you guys can fill me in on some childhood secrets.”

As he walked away from the table, he heard you warn your siblings to keep their mouths shut. They laughed in response, which made Bucky smile. Surely it’d take more than one outburst at a family dinner to fix your broken bond but it was a good start.

During dessert, he learned that everyone called you ‘Splotchy’ because you painted on the living room walls as a child. He learned that you always wanted to play board games with Okoye. Your favourite one was Mystery Date.

“She had a crush on Tyler, the beach date.”

“No, that’s not true, don’t listen to them.”

When they finally left, you spent a few extra moments hugging everyone. Promises were made, and Bucky couldn’t help but smile as he watched you wave goodbye to your siblings.

It was just the two of you again, and the mountain of dirty dishes and silverware. He told you not to worry about the dishes, but you knew if he went to bed he wouldn't be able to sleep, not when the kitchen was such a mess so you cleaned together.

He loved these moments with you. There was something very peaceful about the night; the dark skies, the soft lights, the quiet apartment, knowing people all around town where getting ready for bed. It used to make him feel tiny and isolated but now, with you, the night didn’t seem so frightening anymore.

A few weeks went by, and things were changing a bit. You spent your Saturday mornings with your sisters, bonding, and facetimed with Scott at least once a week.

Bucky also noticed a subtle change in Sam’s behaviour. He seemed happier and he wondered if his friend had already forgotten Natasha.

It was almost June, and the building’s swimming pool reopened as the weather got warmer. Despite living there for several years, he had never gone near that swimming pool until you dragged him out one scorching afternoon.

The rooftop was surprisingly calm, apart for the group of children playing in the pool. There were people sunbathing around the pool, enjoying a good book, socializing. You dropped your bag on the floor and laid out your towel on the reclining chair.

Bucky had never seen you in a bathing suit before and it caught him completely off guard, but what made him literally growl was seeing the little pendant of your necklace rest against your skin. He didn’t know why but it awoke something in him.

You both slathered on sunscreen before you went for a swim. Bucky recognized a few neighbours, and while they all knew he only had one arm, they had never seen him shirtless before. Bucky didn’t mind their inquisitiveness, as long as you were beside him.

“Do you think the kids peed in the water?” you asked as you rested against the edge of the pool.

“Probably,” Bucky cringed. “When I was a kid, my mom told me that there were chemicals that turned the water a different color when someone pees.”

“Ew,” you laughed.

After a while, he lay out in the sun, enjoying the feel of the sun on his skin. He could still hear you playing water polo with the kids when a shadow passed over him. With a frown, he pushed his sunglasses up onto his forehead.

“It’s nice to see you, James,” his neighbour beamed, taking a seat on your unoccupied chair. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you out here.”

“Hi.” He wasn’t surprised when his voice came out hoarse since he had been on the verge of falling asleep. With the grace of a walrus, he propped himself into a sitting position. “Yes, well, swimming pools are more fun when you’re not alone.”

His neighbour turned to look at you. “Congratulations, by the way. I didn’t know you were seeing someone. Must have been serious if you two moved in together. How long has it been since she moved in? Six months?”

“Seven.”

He knew he should have corrected her, you weren’t his girlfriend, but it felt good. It was just a harmless little lie.

“Does she make you happy?”

“I’m the happiest man on earth,” he replied with a bright smile, then slid his sunglasses back on his face.

His neighbour chuckled quietly. “I can see that!”

When you returned to your seat, his neighbour was gone. You hummed to yourself as you settled into your seat, big droplets of water running down your body. Bucky tilted his head down and peered at you over the top of his sunglasses.

“Where did you get that popsicle?”

“Jealous?” You licked your treat without looking at him. “The kids’ mom gave me one as a thank you for looking after her kids.”

“That looks good.”

“So good.”

“Mind sharing it with me?”

You pursed your lips thoughtfully, then held out your popsicle. As Bucky leaned closer, you pulled it away and jumped to your feet. The look he gave you was one of pure betrayal.

“Oh, angel, you should have never done that.”

He grinned to himself when he saw a shiver run through you. When he stood up, you took a step back. He strutted toward you, his grin predatory. The floor was slippery so you couldn’t go very far.

“Are you ready to share now?”

“No!”

The popsicle melted down your hand, creating a mess. You turned your arm and licked the drops of popsicle juice from the inside of your wrist. It distracted you long enough for Bucky to wrap his arm around your waist, pulling you against him. You squealed and grabbed him around the neck to keep from falling while also trying not to smush the popsicle against his chest.

You waved the treat in front of his face and he tried to bite off the tip of your popsicle. It made you laugh, your body sagging against him. His face was close to yours. He was so close he could smell the artificial orange scent of your popsicle.

Your laughter died down and your breath caught in your throat when you saw the way he was looking at you. Without thinking, he went for it. He felt your fingers flex against his skin, urging him closer.

His lips were barely a breath away from yours when one of the kids repeatedly slapped your thigh, obviously oblivious to what the two grownups were about to do.

“Come back! We haven’t finished the game,” the kid whined. “Come on!”

Reluctantly, you let go of Bucky and took a step back. Your exhale came out shaky, and in your almost-kiss-induced trance you handed him the popsicle without saying anything before you followed the kid.

You turned back to look at him, one hand sprawled across your stomach, the other across your chest. He knew you were feeling it too: the butterflies, the racing heartbeat, that pleasant heat going through your body.

The difference between like and love.

A week later, he came home to an empty apartment. He climbed the stairs to your studio but you weren’t there. Instead, he found a canvas stretched out smooth and tight on the floor, and several bowls of paint arranged in a semi-circle around it.

He knew you were home, you wouldn’t leave without your phone or bag. Out of curiosity, he went up on the roof and let out a relieved breath when he found you.

You were sitting on the edge of the rooftop with your knees up to your chin and your arms wrapped loosely around your shins. You looked so beautiful in the golden hue of the setting sun.

He stood there, watching you as if he was looking at a painting in a museum. Entranced. You hadn’t noticed him yet, and a quick glance around the roof told him you were alone.

Slowly, he made his way to you and took in your appearance: a short sleeve white shirt and a pair of denim overalls. The shirt was surprisingly spotless but the overalls were covered in dried paint splatters of different colours.

“I looked everywhere for you,” he spoke softly, trying not to disturb you.

“Did you?”

You straightened up a little but kept your eyes trained on the horizon. Bucky sat close to your feet and let his hand slip under the hem of your jeans to close around your ankle. A sigh slipped past your lips, and he let his fingertips linger for a moment on your smooth skin.

He knew you had a meeting today, and judging by the resigned look on your face, it didn’t go well.

“What’s on your mind, angel?” he said, caressing the top of your foot.

“I was thinking about the night we met. God, I was so nervous,” you said, laughing softly. “I told you that agreeing to meet you was like choosing between a pack of wolves and jumping off a cliff.”

“I remember,” he chuckled.

“I never told you how glad I am that I jumped off that cliff,” you said. “I’d never jumped head first into something, not knowing what was going to happen. Now I think I’m addicted to it. Before I met you, I was living for others. Everything single decision was thoroughly analysed. There was no mystery, fun, or impulsiveness. I put my entire life on hold, and now I see that I can’t do that anymore.”

“What are you going to do?”

You paused, searching for the right words. “I don’t know if I want to turn my passion into a career. Painting is my safe-place, and right now it’s giving me so much anxiety. I haven’t had the inspiration to paint in weeks.” You looked at him and pressed your lips together tightly. “And, if I don’t want to become a full time artist, then I guess our deal is off.”

Bucky stared at you, mouth agape. He really hadn’t seen it coming.

“Please, don’t be angry,” you pleaded. “I don’t want to stop seeing you. When he didn’t answer, you leaned forward and touched his face.

“I could never be angry with you, angel,” he said, kissing the inside of your palm. “I understand, and I’ll help you however I can.”

“I’m not sure yet. I’m still thinking about it.” You looked away from him and stared at the sky. “Do you know that feeling when you stand in a high place and you think about jumping? You don’t want to jump and you don’t do it, but there’s that urge.”

“I think I do.”

“It’s called ‘call of the void’. People say that it’s an affirmation of our will to live. That knowing we’re going to die one day makes us appreciate life even more.” You looked at him. “I want to jump but I can’t. I’m scared.” You lowered your voice. “I don’t want to ruin what we have.”

“You’re scaring me a little. You can’t talk about jumping when we’re sitting on the edge of the roof.”

You chuckled under your breath. “It’s a metaphor.”

“Let’s go home. We’ll make dinner together, put on some music and pretend we’re in a movie.” He got to his feet and held out his hand to you. “Please.”

You took his hand and let him lead you to the staircase.

Once you were inside the apartment, he removed his shoes and you removed yours. Silence settled between the two of you as you entered the kitchen. Bucky moved behind the counter while you stood close to the dining table.

When he chanced a glance at you, he saw you staring into nothing while you played with the charm on your necklace, rolling it back and forth on its chain. You often did that when you were daydreaming.

Bucky walked over to you and placed his hand on top of yours, halting your movements. You let go of the pendant and held his hand instead. He ran his thumb soothingly over your fingers.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” he spoke softly.

“If I say it, it’s going to change everything.”

He pressed your joined hands against his chest, over his heart. “No, it’ll make it real.”

He let go of your hand and cupped the side of your face. You leaned closer until you were only inches apart. His thumb traced your cheekbone, then moved to trace the outline of your bottom lip.

He let you come to him, let you take that first step, and when your lips brushed against his, he closed his eyes and sighed. He kissed your parted lips; once, twice, three times, tiny little kisses against your trembling lips.

His kiss grew bolder, turning into something so intimate, so passionate and intense that tears gathered in his eyes. He pressed his mouth more firmly against yours, his large hand still cupping the side of your face. His bad shoulder jutted forward as if his missing arm wanted to touch you.

He let out a groan, frustrated that he only had one hand to finally explore your skin. Sensing his inner turmoil, you held onto his bad shoulder and pulled him against you.

His tongue swept into your mouth, moving in a slow and deliberate rhythm. A growl escaped him and he deepened the kiss, tasting, sliding, retreating and entering again. He poured everything he had into the kiss.

“Bucky,” you moaned after your broke the kiss, breathless.

Hearing his name fall from your lips, your voice hoarse with desire, sparked something inside him. He swiped his thumb over your bottom lip, feeling the softness and collecting the moisture that had gathered there.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said, looking positively entranced. “My pretty angel.”

You pulled him in for another kiss and wrapped your arms around his neck, your slightly cold hands felt amazing against his heated skin. He pressed himself against you, letting you feel the rise and fall of his chest, the desperation in the jerky thrust of his hips.

He needed more but he wasn’t going to force you into anything. He was more than happy to stand here and kiss you for hours. He cupped the back of your neck and rubbed the sensitive skin behind your ear with his thumb.

“I’m yours,” he spoke against your lips, his eyes screwed shut.

You pulled back to look him in the eye, searching his face. He opened his eyes and you saw nothing but honesty in the depth of his eyes.

You untangled yourself from him and took his hand. Slowly, you took a step back, then another, his hand still in yours. His eyebrows lifted slightly when you bit your bottom lip and gave him a coy look.

He nearly growled again, the wolf inside him eager to touch you, feel you, claim you. He stood taller, his chest puffed out and breathing fast.

You led him up the stairs to the second floor and turned on the light in the corridor. You slowly made your way down the corridor with him behind you.

But instead of turning left towards his bedroom, you turned right into your studio, and it changed everything. Your studio was your sanctuary, your safe place, and knowing that you were about to bare your soul and body to him tamed his inner wolf.

You hesitated at the threshold of the room and glanced over your shoulder to look at him. Bucky squeezed your hand to encourage you.

“I bought some body paint on my way home,” you said, letting go of his hand to step into the room. “I wanted to try something different, something more personal. I wanted to use my body to express my emotions, to create something raw and messy. My interpretation of somatic art therapy.”

You moved around the darkened room; bent down to adjust the canvas on the floor and made sure the bowls of paint were still full.

“I sat there and thought of my mom and Pietro,” you continued, barefoot on the canvas. “I only feel sadness and anger, and I don’t want to create something that makes me feel sad. And I realized the only thing that keeps me inspired is hope.”

Turning to face him, you held your hand out, palm up, and his eyes widened at your silent request. Without thinking twice, he joined you on the canvas. It was both soft and scratchy under his feet.

Bucky watched as you unbuckled the right strap of your overalls and slipped the second strap off your shoulder. You tugged your jeans down your legs and tossed them aside, leaving you in your underwear and white shirt.

Swallowing thickly, Bucky let his eyes travel up and down your body. He had seen you in your bathing suit before but this was different. Then he reached behind his neck and pulled his shirt over his head, baring his strong chest, hard abdomen and marred skin.

The room was dark; the pastel sky, visible from your studio thanks to the floor-to-ceiling windows in the living room, didn’t provide much light. The light was still on in the corridor, casting a faint golden glow over the room.

You took a step forward to examine his scars more carefully and Bucky took that opportunity to kiss you again, slowly, intimately. He peppered kisses along your jaw and down your neck, then went down on his knees in front of you and continued his journey down your body, pressing soft kisses to your stomach.

He accidentally knocked over two bowls of paint; the dark colours spilled out onto the canvas, chasing each other. His kisses made you light up with desire, your moans music to his ears as your hands came down on the back of his head.

When it all became too much, you gently pushed him into a lying position and helped him out of his jeans. His belt buckle made a faint clink when you pulled it open, and Bucky swore out loud when you planted a wet open-mouthed kiss right below his navel.

In the back of his mind, he knew he wasn’t going to survive the night. He let his head fall back against the canvas and closed his eyes shut. Your talented mouth sent sharp jolts of pleasure through him, making it difficult to breathe.

He could feel the paint stick to his back, creating the shape of his upper body on the canvas. It was strangely exciting.

He moaned, arching his back, and slammed his fist down on the canvas. His fist landed in one of the bowls of paint. It splashed paint everywhere. He looked down at you and saw tiny flecks of paint splayed like freckles on one side of your face.

It made you both giggle. As he pushed himself up into a sitting position, Bucky left a print of his forearm on the canvas. You climbed into his lap, straddling him, then removed your shirt and bra. You wrapped your legs around him, one hand on his upper arm, the other hugging his neck.

Bucky was sitting on the canvas with his legs outstretched and slightly bent at the knees. He held you against his chest, rocking back and forth, his arm around the small of your back. You sighed together, sharing the same breath.

“You have the prettiest nose.” You let your index finger run down the length of his nose, your finger wet with paint. “So pretty.”

Laughing softly, he brushed his nose against yours and kissed you. He changed the angle of his thrusts, catching you by surprise.

“Does that feel good, angel?” he asked, lightly biting your jaw. You answered with a short cry. “Look at me.” You slowly opened your eyes, your movements faltered a little. “You’re so beautiful like this. You drive me crazy, y’know that?”

“Bucky,” you cried out.

He felt you shiver when he moved his hand from your back to your face. He cupped the side of your face and you immediately pressed yourself closer to him, craving the warmth of his touch.

He stopped your movements and looked you in the eye. “I’d do anything for you. Anything. You’re my one and only.”

He laid you down as gently and safely as he could, and once you were lying flat on your back, he sprawled between your thighs. He supported his weight on his forearm, careful not to crush you. Your hands slid up his sides, and as your thumb traced over his ribcage, a violent shiver went through his body.

He had never seen anything more beautiful than watching you come apart; your eyebrows furrowed, your lips parted in a silent ‘o’, the way your body shook in little spams. Absolutely stunning.

Exhausted, he collapsed on top of you and hid his face in the crook of your neck. You wrapped your arms around him and slowly caressed his back.

After he kissed his way down the side of your neck, he straightened himself up into a kneeling position and looked down at you. Your naked body was on display, covered in paint and glistening under the moonlight. He wished he could take a picture, immortalize this memory.

He helped you up, and after another passionate kiss he led you to his bathroom, the two of you leaving colourful footprints all over the clean floor.

The bathroom's bright fluorescent light was harsh and unforgiving as you looked at each other in the mirror. Yet you were both glowing, streaks and dots of paint covering your bodies. Bucky turned on the water and waited for it to get hot.

He wrapped his arm around you from behind and rested his chin on your shoulder. “We look like we blew up a rainbow,” he said, smiling wide when it made you chuckle.

In the shower, you took turns washing each other, laughing and kissing until the water turned cold. You pushed his hair out of his eyes and smiled sweetly at him.

“We’re going to catch a cold if we stay here.”

“Mhh,” he replied, kissing your temple. “You’re right. There are clean towels on the shelf. Go, I’ll be right behind you, I still need to take care of my scar.”

“Can I help you?”

Asking for help wasn’t something he was comfortable with, especially after years of being babied by his ex-girlfriend, friends and family. After his accident, he couldn’t do anything on his own. He had to rely on others and it made him feel like a burden, like he was incapable of taking care of himself.

He knew it was all in his head but he couldn’t help it.

“It’s not exactly sexy,” he said.

“I don’t care. I want to help. Tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”

Patiently he guided you step by step through the process of cleaning his stump. You inspected his skin thoroughly, looking for irritation or any signs of infection, then washed it with a mild soap.

He had to admit that watching the woman he loved take such good care of his scar made his stomach fill with butterflies. You looked so focused, so attentive, that he could help but smile and try to kiss you.

“Bucky,” you complained, turning your head away, avoiding his kiss. “This is serious business, stop fooling around.”

He almost said it. I love you. But something was holding him back. He didn’t know what would happen next and it scared him. He didn’t want this to be a one-time thing, but he also realized that things were moving too fast.

“Okay, now you’re shivering,” he said, holding you close, trying to share his body heat with you. “Let’s get out of here.”

He wrapped you in a fluffy bathrobe and patted you dry. Then you carefully dried his scar and applied corticosteroid cream to his shoulder, massaging it gently into his skin. He slipped on his robe and you loosely tied the belt at his waist.

“We should talk about what just happened,” you said, playing with the belt. “What does it mean? What are we going to do? Can we-mph”

He cut you off with a kiss, long and hard and filled with passion. You smiled against his lips and finally pulled away.

“Is that how you’re going to shut me up from now on?” you asked with a grin.

“We’ll talk,” he said, pressing his forehead against yours. “But not tonight.”

“When then?”

“Tomorrow, I promise.”

You looked down at your hands on his belt and nodded. He tilted your head up and lowered his mouth to yours.

“Don’t avoid me tomorrow. Please.”

Your words felt like a knife in his heart, and it left him momentarily speechless. He took one of your hands and pressed it against his heart. “No matter what we decide to do, you’re my angel and I’m yours.”

You shared a long, silent hug before you both decided to call it a night. Once he saw the footprints in the corridor, Bucky felt the urge to clean them. He tried to resist but he knew if he didn't clean he wouldn't be able to sleep.

You understood –you always understood. That’s why he felt so comfortable with you.

Once it was clean, he joined you in the kitchen and made you breakfast for dinner, opening the cupboard and pulling out a couple boxes of cereal you didn’t even know he had.

He told you that he was keeping them for a special occasion. He remembered you telling him that it was your favourite meal as a kid, watching TV with your siblings every Sunday night, eating cereals.

“I can’t believe you remembered that,” you said, tears in your eyes.

The two of you sat on your bed, sharing random thoughts and spoonfuls of cereal. You giggled as milk dribbled down his chin and stained his robe. You wiped at the spot on his chin with your thumb and gave him a chaste kiss.

Your lips tasted sweet. Bucky pulled you in for another kiss, discarding the dirty dishes on your bedside table. You helped each other undress, then slid under the covers where you laid your head on Bucky’s chest.

“Bucky,” your voice cut through the quiet. “Do you mind-”

“Don’t worry, my angel, I’ll wait until you fall asleep.”

“Thank you.”

Part 12

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #marvel #marvel fanfiction #marvel imagines #bucky barnes imagines #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel imagine #bucky barnes imagine #redgillan #redgillanwrites

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rpgmgames · 4 years

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March’s Featured Game: acai cOrner

DEVELOPER(S): moca & Mitty ENGINE: RPG Maker 2003 GENRE: RPG, Adventure, Surreal SUMMARY: acai cOrner is about Mizuki, someone who has fallen into the sewers and who happens to find their favorite electric guitar! Upon obtaining the guitar, Mizuki turns into a magical girl who must defend herself against spooky sewer creatures using the guitar's magical powers.

Download the game here! Our Interview With The Dev Team Below The Cut!

Introduce yourself! *moca: Hi, I'm moca, a Starbucks barista aspiring to be a writer and game developer. I have been making RPG Maker games for about six years now, with my first two projects being a Pokémon fan-game and a Corpse Party fan-game. Those two happen to be my two favorite franchises as well! I have also created the RPG Maker game MOMOKA (IGMC 2018). I have founded a group called 'Team Shibu!' dedicated to making horror games! Our current project is a RPG Maker survival horror game named 'Katharsis'.

*Mitty: Hey there, I'm Mitty! I've been working with Moca on several games for a while now, helping with mostly graphics! Please support him, as he is very kind and hardworking!! I'm also the main developer of a game called "Marinette", so I hope you'll check that one out too, when the demo is released!

What is your project about? What inspired you to create this game initially? *moca: acai cOrner is an experimental spooky RPG Maker game that only uses 4 colors! You are a magical girl with a just-as-magical electric guitar that you use to fend off spooky sewer slimes and other weird enemies you find in the surreal sewer system. It's half exploration and half RPG battles. What inspired me to create acai cOrner initially was to actually get myself back into the groove of making games again. I had just recently came back from a hiatus and found myself having trouble getting back into the development of 'Katharsis'. That's when I decided to make a short, experimental game to get the juices flowing.

How long did you work on your project? *moca: acai cOrner was finished in just about under a month!

Did any other games or media influence aspects of your project? *moca: I had always wanted to make a Yume Nikki-like game and thought this was the perfect opportunity to try. So for the more surreal parts of acai cOrner, I took inspiration from Yume Nikki and a Homestuck random planet generator. Gameplay wise though, I took inspiration from a RPG Maker game called Ghost Suburb 0! I really loved how unique it was, especially with the timer and no dialogue aspect. I knew I wanted to do something with a timer, so I tried a rogue-like approach with the gameplay.

Have you come across any challenges during development? How have you overcome or worked around them? *moca: If you played any of my previous projects, you know that acai cOrner is vastly different than anything that I have ever done. I'm so used to using words to describe the violence in my games, so when it came to making the story, I had a lot of trouble. It wasn't until I looked deeper into why people like these types of games that I had realized that people like to interpret the story on their own, guided by exploration, to enjoy these games. After that, I let loose a bit and made something more open-ended. Another challenge was the difficulty. I was the only one playtesting the game, and since I knew the game front and back, and had no trouble getting the ending. That's why when I sent out demos to friends, I was really discouraged to hear that the experience was mostly frustrating and rage quitting-inducing haha. I worked closely with their feedback and made changes accordingly to make the experience less frustrating but still difficult. *Mitty: I think I was going through a weird artblock during the development of the game, so for some of the illustrations and backdrops for each area's fights, Moca sketched out the basic idea of what it could look like, and I just put my spin on it! It made the work much easier and faster!

Did any aspects of your project change over time? How does your current project differ from your initial concept? *moca: Well, the game was meant to be short so there wasn't room for any big changes. Sure there are a couple gameplay changes and enemy tweaks, but not anything mindblowing. I added in the idea of making four surreal worlds kinda last minute, if that counts, haha.

What was your team like at the beginning? How did people join the team? If you don’t have a team, do you wish you had one or do you prefer working alone? *moca: In the beginning, it was just me! I didn't think I was gonna need any outside help since this was supposed to be a relatively easy project to release, but the further in development I got, the more I realized the game needed pizazz. The four color limitation wasn't enough for my lack of graphical talent. That's when I contacted Mitty about helping with the games battle backdrops and sprite animations! She is also a member of Team Shibu!, but we have collabed together even before that. Her art really made the project shine and I enjoy working with them on games! *Mitty: Moca contacted me, and I wanted to help! We are working together on another game called Katharsis, so we are quite familiar with each other. I like working with other people, especially if I'm not in the lead, it releases a bit of the pressure I feel sometimes ahaha

What is the best part of developing a game? *moca: To me, it's seeing everything come together and just... working exactly the way you envisioned it. As a game developer, you section the game off into parts to make development much more organized and faster but seeing it all come together in the end. Pure bliss *chefs kiss*. *Mitty: I like a bit of everything, but currently I've been enjoying animating and spritework, as well as map assets' designs a little more than usual!

Do you find yourself playing other RPG Maker games to see what you can do with the engine, or do you prefer to do your own thing? *moca: Mm... not really! I have an idea of what the engine can do, so when I do go out of my way to player other RPG Maker games, it's usually for writing inspiration rather than gameplay inspiration. Ghost Suburb 0 is something that I accidentally stumbled upon and immediately fell in love with it the minute I played it haha. (Fun fact: the developer of Ghost Suburb 0 is apart of Team Shibu! and is in charge of monster design!)

Which character in your game do you relate to the most and why? (Alternatively: Who is your favorite character and why?) *moca: There is a rat in the game that is internally called 'Ratthew' who leads you into a funky room. I relate them the most. *Mitty: I relate to the land sharks the most on a spiritual level. They are pretty much confused beans, and that's very relatable.

Looking back now, is there anything that regret/wish you had done differently? *moca: I wish I added more random spooky events and trap rooms. But the game was also supposed to be short and I knew that if I kept adding more and more things, development was never gonna end haha.

Do you plan to explore the game’s universe and characters further in subsequent projects, or leave it as-is? *moca: Well, by the time this interview comes out, there should be a new update for the game. The update should include 100% custom music by a talented composer, and a nerf in difficulty. As for sequels, who knows! The next time you see acai cOrner may be in 3D.

What do you most look forward to upon finishing the game? *moca: Definitely the fan reaction! The satisfaction of seeing your work being noticed by people and actually enjoying makes me happy. It's also the relief of just... finishing something! *Mitty: For this particular project I was obviously looking forward to seeing what people said about the little animations and such ahaha! I also was curious about the reaction to the timed difficulty mechanic, I had never seen anything like that before Moca presented it to me, so I had no idea on what people's feedback would be.

Is there something you’re afraid of concerning the development or the release of your game? *moca: How people will handle the difficulty. The game isn't supposed to be completed on your first playthrough, but in 2-3 playthroughs. There are rooms and places that are meant to waste your time that you should ideally skip the more you play. By later playthroughs, you should be shaving time and be better. I understand that it's not handled as best I could, but I think the experience should still be challenging and hopefully fun! *Mitty: I was a little conflicted on the timed mechanic, I loved it because it's pretty original and helps set an interesting athmosphere of worry and unease, and also seems to tell a bit of the vague story; and at the same time I don't like it much because I prefer more story-driven games and the vagueness mixed with the mechanic feels different from what I'm used to playing! I think it's more of a personal taste kind of thing, it was an experimental jam game, after all!

Do you have any advice for upcoming devs? *moca: Take it easy! Take short breaks throughout development. And most importantly, have fun. If it's a hobby and it's making you overly stressed, just take a step back!

Question from last month's featured dev @ressurflection: What would you say is the weakest part of your game development? *moca: Procrastination. I'm so bad at sticking to my own schedule, it's something that I try to keep in check when working with a team especially.

We mods would like to thank moca & Mitty for agreeing to our interview! We believe that featuring the developer and their creative process is just as important as featuring the final product. Hopefully this Q&A segment has been an entertaining and insightful experience for everyone involved!

Remember to check out acai cOrner if you haven’t already! See you next month!

- Mods Gold & Platinum

#rpg maker #acai corner #acai corner game #rpg maker games #pixel games #indie games #gotm #game of the month #march #march 2020 #2020 #moca #mitty #interview #needles

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simplicityts · 3 years

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100 Baby Challenge Guide | Part I: Overview & Matriarch

Objective

The objective of the 100 Baby Challenge is to give birth to 100 children in as few generations as possible, and successfully raise them to Young Adulthood.

Rules

No cheats or mods, except for ‘bb.moveobjects on’ and ‘reset sim’.

No help from nannies, baby daddies, or free services. Daycare is allowed only when leaving your lot to woo another donor.

You can’t use the same donor twice.

You can’t change pre-existing lot traits or lot traits that you choose, so choose wisely.

A child must reach Young Adulthood to count toward the 100 -- therefore they can’t die or be taken away by social services.

Your matriarch can’t get married until she becomes an elder, and must move out of the household after she is married.

You can’t have a career that takes you out of the household. Example: rabbit-hole jobs.

Only Young Adults can be moved out of the household.

You can’t influence your child’s gender or traits. You must use the randomizer for traits. You can't eat carrots or strawberries. You must avoid Pop and alternative music.

You can only age up:

-> Babies on their actual birthday;

-> Toddlers once they reach level 3 in all skills, or on their birthday, and;

-> When Children and Teens get an A in school.

TIP: Toddlers who reach level 3 or higher in their skills will have a head start in their skills when they age up to children, so don’t just let them languish until their birthdays. (I will go into more detail about this in Part 3: Babies and Toddlers.)

Step 1: Create your Matriarch

According to the official challenge rules by Snarky Witch, your Matriarch can be male (as long as he can become pregnant) or female, but I’m going to use female pronouns for simplicity sake. You can make her look and sound however you want, but she must be a Young Adult.

Choose her traits and aspirations wisely!

1. Aspirations

I highly recommend either the ‘Freelance Botanist’ or ‘Painter Exraordinaire’ aspiration to begin with. I’ve done both, but I personally prefer the former rather than the latter, because you only have to tend to your plants once a day and are therefore not tied to an easel. The problems I encountered with painting are that it takes awhile to finish one painting, and my matriarch would have to start and stop every time she went into labor or had to do anything else (like eat or take care of kids). You can still paint until your plants start generating simoleons (§), but the lot I chose comes with blooming herbs, so I don’t have to wait.

TIP: However, I also recommend switching back and forth between aspirations, because meeting aspiration milestones will give you satisfaction points which you can spend on helpful reward traits (see the Reward Traits section below). In addition to the ‘Freelance Botanist’ (if you choose to garden at all) and the ‘Painter Extraordinaire’ aspirations, you’ll want to complete the following ones as well:

-> Fabulously Wealthy:

You’ll earn 5% interest on your household funds every week. More § for doing nothing? Yes, please!

-> Nerd Brain:

Instantly fix or upgrade any object. Super useful when stuff breaks, and trust me, they will. Completing knowledge based aspirations such as this one will also give you the Quick Learner bonus trait, which will help you learn skills faster.

-> Big Happy Family:

You’ll boost your children’s skill gains whenever you’re nearby, which means they’ll age up faster, and the faster you can age them out, the faster you can make more kids and finish the challenge.

-> Mansion Baron:

Get 10% back on any build mode purchases added to your household funds once a week. You’re going to be buying stuff to furnish your house, so you might as well get some of your § back, no?

-> Serial Romantic:

You might find this handy for the Alluring bonus trait, because it makes you more successful at romantic interactions.

You can still do career based aspirations like Master Chef without actually joining the career. You just won’t be able to complete them once you get to the career based goals. For Master Chef, you can go up to Milestone III. That’s 1,425 satisfaction points right there! Just be sure to switch to this aspiration before you cook anything, and you’ll easily blow through these goals and milestones (same with the other ones).

TIP: I’ll leave you with this last note: don’t bother with children’s aspirations, EXCEPT for your successor! Completing children’s aspirations just wastes time getting them out of the house, but completing these for your successor is beneficial because it means they can buy bonus traits sooner.

2a. Traits

Check out Carl’s Guide to The Sims 4 Traits if you need help narrowing down your traits, but I highly recommend the following:

-> Creative: your sim will become inspired more often, in turn increasing the quality and value of their paintings (higher quality = more §). Choose this one only if you plan on painting being your primary source of income. Otherwise choose something like Cheerful, which will make your sim happier in general, or any of the other traits instead. For instance, I’ve chosen ‘Loves Outdoors’ for my gardeners.

-> Romantic: your sims will be flirty more often, and will gain romantic relationships faster than other sims. This will help you woo and bed donors faster.

-> Family-Oriented: your sim will gain happiness from being around family, which will honestly be most of the time.

2b. Reward Traits

Reward traits can be bought with satisfaction points from the Rewards store. To get to the Rewards Store, press G and then click on the present.

IMPORTANT! Save your matriarch’s satisfaction points for traits; don’t waste them on potions. However, exchange your Young Adults’ satisfaction points for the ‘Moodlet Solver’ or the ‘Re-Traiting’ reward potion, and then transfer them to your matriarch’s inventory before you move the kid out of your household.

The Moodlet Solver potions will come in handy whenever your sims are mourning the death of someone they know, because it removes all negative moodlets. Don’t mistake this for the Happy potion, which is only a temporary fix.

The Re-Traiting potion, however, is best used on your next matriarch only. The rules of the challenge dictate that you have to randomize all of your children’s traits, so you will inevitably end up with a successor that has unfavorable traits. This potion will allow you to change their traits to more suitable ones. However, focus on stocking up on the Moodlet Solver potions first, and only purchase this one if and when you need it.

I’ve separated the Reward Traits I recommend into 3 categories: general, painters, and gardeners. They’re then ordered from most to least important in each of their categories. If you’re matriarch is a gardener or painter, I recommend buying Never Weary first, then skip to your specific categories, and finally work your way down the rest of the general list. However, anything after Great Kisser really isn’t necessary.

In general...

-> Never Weary (10,000): never have to sleep again! Trust me you’ll want to buy this first, because you’ll get more done if you’re not wasting 6+ hours sleeping.

-> Night Owl (1,000): gain skills 25% faster between 8PM and 3AM. You’re not sleeping any way, so this is great!

-> Frugal (2,000): reduces bills by 25%. Who doesn’t like saving money?

-> Beguiling (2,500): this is my favorite way to woo donors, because it makes it so easy.

-> Great Kisser (3,000): this one increases your Charisma skill every time you kiss, and charismatic sims are more successful at wooing donors.

-> Fertile (3,000): increases your chances of twins and triplets. I don’t recommend this early on. You definitely want to get comfortable with this challenge, and in a groove, before you start popping out multiples.

-> Forever Fresh (8,000): never need to shower or bathe again! Honestly, after the Toddler stage, showering is faster than bathing and isn’t really that much of an inconvenience.

-> Forever Full (10,000): never need to eat again. I like to make my Matriarch and Teens watch the cooking channel while they eat, because it raises their cooking skill, and satisfies their hunger and fun needs at the same time. Therefore this reward, like the previous one, is a very low priority.

For Painters...

-> Marketable (1,500): increases the value of paintings by 10% to triple the usual value. Choose this one, and the next one, if painting is your primary source of income. Otherwise, skip to Night Owl.

-> Creative Visionary (2,000): 20% higher chance of painting Masterpieces, which are worth A LOT of §.

For Gardeners...

-> Morning Sim (1,000): gain skills 25% faster between 5AM and 12PM. This one is great if gardening is your primary source of income, because your plants will need to be tended to and harvested at around 7AM.

For more information on reward traits, check out Carl’s guide here.

Step 2: Choose How to Make Money

I’m not going to spend much time on this, except to clarify which sources of income/careers are allowed. Only Careers that allow you to choose to ‘Work from Home’ are allowed as long as you always choose that option. I’ll try to list all of them, but I’ve only actually tried the Freelancer and Gardener careers with this challenge.

Work from home careers are as follows:

-> Freelancer (Basegame): including Digital Artist, Programmer, Writer, Fashion Photographer (Moschino Stuff), and Crafter Branch (Eco Lifestyle). I don’t recommend this career, because I found it difficult to manage a work-life balance.

-> Critic (City Living): Art or Food Critic.

-> Style Influencer (Basegame): Trendsetter or Stylist.

-> Gardener (Seasons): I prefer Botanist over Floral Designer, because I have no interest in creating flower arrangements. This is also the career I choose, because my Matriarch’s are usually gardeners.

-> Civil Designer (Eco-Lifestyle): Civil Planner or Green Technician.

-> Military (Strangerville): Covert Operator or Officer.

-> Social Media (City Living): Public Relations or Internet Personality.

Keep in mind that you DON’T have to do any of these careers, but make sure they compliment your Matriarch’s traits if you do. I’d even recommend avoiding these altogether if you’re starting this challenge for the first time.

I choose to pursue the Gardener career, because I get bored with just gardening on its own. This also gives me an additional source of income on top of my side hustles (i.e. gardening, selling collectables, etc..)

Other sources of income include:

-> Painting

-> Gardening

-> Fishing

-> Digging for collectables

-> Selling honey (beekeeping in Seasons)

There’s probably more, but I only have experience with Basegame and Seasons, because, up until recently, those were the only ones I owned.

If you have Seasons installed...

I recommend you get at least one Money Tree, but you don’t have to spend 5,000 points in the rewards store to get a seed. You can easily get a fully grown tree from the Gallery if you have the § , and don’t consider this cheating. Perfect trees are available, but I prefer to download the '3 x Money Fruit Tree’ from SimBuilder20 instead. As I’ve said before, I prefer to make § gardening, so starting with a lower level tree helps me build up my matriarch’s gardening skill and complete the ‘Freelance Botanist’ aspiration quicker.

TIP: You don’t have to keep spending points or simoleons to get more money trees.

Here’s how to get 5 more Money Trees for FREE: go into build mode and put your money tree into your household inventory when it bears fruit. When you do this, the fruit (i.e. seeds) will be separated from the tree. You can then take them out of the inventory and plant them (and your first tree) somewhere on your lot.

Conclusion

Please do a Google search for more information on anything mentioned in this guide. Carl’s Sims 4 guides are a great resource, but so is Youtube, etc..

If you have any additional tips regarding the topics covered in this post, please include them as a note on this thread. Otherwise, stay tuned for Part II: Your Lot wherein we will discuss things like: choosing which lot to purchase, applying lot traits, and saving money in build/buy mode.

#thesims4 #the sims 4 #ts4 #ts4 challenge #100 baby challenge #challenge #100 Baby Challenge Guide

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xmalereader · 4 years

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Javier Pena X Son! Reader

ONE | | TWO | | THREE | | FINAL

|| Masterlist ||

Summary: Javier has been keeping his son a secret from everyone, but what happens when he comes to stay with him for a week?

Warnings: Protective Javier, Slight angst, family drama, Steve is done. Mitch being the perfect boyfriend.

Javier has been giving y/n the silent treatment as he broods around the apartment, reminding himself that his own son’s boyfriend was staying in Colombia and close to their apartment where he would come and go whenever he wants, of course Javier Didn’t approve of this and would always give Mitch one of his death glares. Warning him to never show up at his apartment ever again.

Steve had made sure to stay out of it, not wanting to be a part of the family drama. Every night he would hear the Pena’s arguing with each other, shouting in Spanish and throwing each other insults but who could blame him? The walls were thin and everything could be heard, so most nights, Murphy would barely get any sleep.

It’s been like this for days now; reaching y/n’s last day of his vacation.

He’s had the worst week, he expected things to go well and to be able to spend time with his father but of course the two could only argue with each other and will soon leave. He didn’t have the time to bond with him so he was back to square one, waiting for his father to return home either dead or alive.

As he folds up his clothes and packs them away he can’t help but sigh, he leaves tomorrow morning which means that he won’t be seeing javi until later tonight.

He wasn’t really in the mood to talk to anyone. He just wanted to go back to Texas and enjoy his grandfathers stories; listening to his voice as he told him stories about his childhood and how much of a trouble maker his father was at his age.

Y/n stops packing as he continues to think. He just noticed that he doesn’t even know that much about Javier. His own father raised him and taught him important things at a young age but once he was sent off to Colombia, he never really saw him again. Spending the rest of his childhood with his grandfather instead.

Why should Javier even care about him? They’ve done nothing but fight all week, it’s not his fault that he came from a cheap whore that his father decides to fuck, only to get a son to raise later on once his mother died from a late night accident.

He was stuck with Javier for the rest of his life but he was happy that he had a father figure for a short period of time until he decide to pick work over family. That’s just who he was; he never cared.

Y/n bites his lip and finished his packing, zipping up his bags and tossing them inside his closet, prepared for him tomorrow.

He makes his way towards the kitchen to get some food. He was starving and wasn’t in the mood to go out and get food, so he finds whatever he can that’s in the fridge; heats it up and sits on the dinning table all alone.

Before he could eat he hears the sound of the front door unlocking, causing him to stand in alert and pull out his pocket knife. He watches the door being pushed open as Mitch steps inside.

“Mitch? What are you doing here, shouldn’t you be at the embassy with my dad?” He asks and puts away his pocket knife to help Mitch inside. He chuckles a little and closes the door behind him, “told him that I would be getting ‘us’ food so I took the advantage to come see you.” He leans down to kiss him softly and smile.

Y/n smiles between the kiss and sighs. “You know he’s going to find out and when he does he’s going to kill you.” He shoves him back and heads back to the dining table to start eating his food.

Mitch follows behind and sits across from him. “So, I’m guessing that you’re all ready to head back home.” He raises a brow at him. The question catches y/n off guard as he pokes his food around and sighs out. “Yeah.”

“Does Javi know?”

“That I’m leaving?”

Mitch nods.

“I doubt it.” Y/n responds back and pushes his plate away, losing his appetite pretty quickly. “He’s busy at work that he probably forgot that I was here—but that’s okay, I’m heading back home tomorrow so I’ll be back in my room, alone...with grandpa...” he sighs out without realizing it.

Mitch could hear the sad tone in his voice, he’s been dating y/n for awhile now to know how upset he really is. He knows that he doesn’t want to go home yet and would rather stay here with his own father and bond with him. Make up the time that they missed together.

He reaches out to take y/n’s hand into his. “Talk to him.”

“What?”

“You obviously need to talk to him.”

Y/n frowns and pulls his hand away, picking up his untouched food and heading to the kitchen. Mitch sighs and follows him. “Y/n you have to talk to him.”

“Even if I talk to him he won’t listen to me, we’ve been arguing all week and I don’t want to end the last day with my own father saying that he ‘doesn’t need me anymore’ and that I should just ‘go back home to Texas’.” He exclaims, throwing away the food and washing the plates.

Mitch leans over to turn off the running water, getting y/n’s attention once again. “Then I’ll make him listen, y/n it’s your last day here and if he doesn’t know how you really feel than maybe he won’t be a real father to you.” He knows that it sounds harsh but he’s telling the truth. “I know you care about him, that you actually see him as a father figure but if you two don’t talk properly—without fights, than maybe he can show you who he really is, deep down he could be a good guy.”

Y/n scoffs and looks away. “What makes you think he’s a good guy? He’s done nothing good.” He mumbled out.

“Nothing good? Y/n that guy raised you and gave you a home. A family! He didn’t take you in because he felt pity towards you, no. He took you in because you are his son, his blood.” Mitch began to explain. “He was their when you first crawled, walked, talked. The first time you went to school, the first time he taught you how to ride a bike, the time he actually taught you how to shoot a gun.” He continues on. “He was their when you graduate school, he watched you grow up—“

“Yeah and then he left, never coming back. When I needed him the most he wasn’t there.” Y/n cuts in, Shoving past him as he heads towards his room, slamming the door shut as Mitch is left standing in the kitchen. He rubs his eyes and sighs before leaving the apartment and heading back to the embassy.

“—you done with that?” Asked steve as he watched Javier type away in his type writer, a cigarette in mouth as he grumbled back in response. “Don’t rush me.” He finally says as he finishes typing and pulls out the paper, putting it between some files and arranging the stack.

The two agents were working late, typing up each report and not having much information about Escobar since that bastard decided to go into hiding for a short while.

As Javier puts out his cigar he leans over to grab his cup of coffee.

Hearing the doors slam open the two agents look up to see Mitch entering the room. “Took you long enough, rapp.” Said Steve as he grins at him.

Mitch ignores steve and turns to Javier, glaring at him as he approached the older agent. He slams his hand down on his desk, getting into his personal space as he says. “Do you know what day it is?”

Javier raises a brow, clearly not afraid of this kid. “Yes.” He answers back.

“Yeah? Because it doesn’t look like you know to me.” Mitch hissed out as he leans forward. “Today is y/n’s last day here, your son, and my boyfriends last day here.”

Javier glared at the word ‘boyfriend’ still not approving their relationship.

“—he’s been nothing but upset since you two have been fighting nonstop for this whole week!” He slams his fist on the desk again but louder.

“Whoa easy—“ Steve tries to cut in.

“Do you even know how excited y/n was before he arrived?” Mitch questions as Javier grinds his teeth. “He was finally going to see his father again after not seeing him for months, he thought that you two would be catching up on each other’s lives, only to have all of those hopes of his come crashing down and now he’s upset. He blames himself for making you upset so now he has to return back home all alone. He’s been planning this for weeks, he always came to me wondering if his father still cared about him and do you want to know what I told him? I said that you were his father, the man who raised him and gave him a childhood.”

The room goes silent.

The tension was so heavy that not even Steve could try and do something to lighten up the mood.

Javiers glare lightens a little, staring at Mitch as he takes in everything. He can’t believe that y/n was planning this trip for weeks only to come and go with nothing but failure and he made him feel this way, he made his own son feel upset. He only wanted to protect him, keep him away from Colombia since he was afraid of losing him. Afraid that one night he’ll never return from shopping, only to find out that escobars men took him away to either kill him or torture him in ways that he doesn’t want to ever know.

As Mitch moves away from the desk he hears Javier take on a deep breath as he eyes Mitch. “Where is he?”

“Still at the apartment.”

Javier nods and stands up, grabbing his jacket and gun. “Finish those reports for me, rapp.” He orders as Mitch gives him a small grin. “Yes, sir.” He watches Javier leave. Heading back home to confront y/n.

Once Javier makes it back home he noticed the lights to his apartment window are turned off meaning that y/n was either sleeping or had gone out. He hopes that y/n was still inside and not roaming around the dangerous streets.

He rushes up the stairs, skipping steps to get to his apartment faster.

Upon reaching the door he takes out his keys to unlock door. He could hear faint music inside as he prys the door open only to be stopped by the chain that was locked above the door causing him to groan deeply.

Javier looks inside between the large gap to see y/n lying on the floor with a vinyl record playing some Colombian music.

“Y/n.” He calls out getting the others attention as the teenagers body turns to face the door, he was obviously crying since his eyes were red and he had a wine bottle right next to him. Y/n was underaged but this wasn’t America so he didn’t care about anything right now.

“What do you want?” He croaks out as he turns back to face the record player that played his music.

“I just want to talk.” Said Javier as he leaves the door open, sitting down against the door as he looks through the gap to see a clear view of y/n lying on the floor with a depressing aura around him.

“Bullshit.” He grumbled out as he reaches out to raise the volume higher, ignoring javiers protests as he concentrates on the music.

Javier curses under his breath as he stands up and closes the door, thinking of an idea as he smirks. He makes his way upstairs to Steve’s apartment door, knocking softly as he waits for Connie to answer.

It doesn’t take long for Connie to answe the door. “Javi? What are you doing here, should’t you be at the embassy with Steve?”

“Yeah I had some things to do here—I was wondering if I could borrow your porch.”

Connie raises a brow. “My porch?”

Javier nods.

Connie narrows her eyes at him before giving in and allowing him inside. “Don’t wake up the baby.” She warns which causes Javier to shiver in fear. “I’ll try.” He says back nervously as he heads towards the balcony, sliding the door open as he steps outside.

He looks below him to see his own porch as he smirks and climbs over, he makes sure that he’s quiet as he lands on his own balcony and checks to see if the door is unlocked. Finding out that it is he slides it open and steps inside.

“Stop being depressed like me.” He says.

Frightening y/n as the teenager squeaks In surprise, causing him to knock Over the record as the music suddenly stops.

Javier was standing over y/n as the teenager stayed lying on the floor, glaring up at his one and only parent. “Go away.”

“I’ve been gone for months, I’m not leaving this time.”

Y/n swallows back his sarcasm as he eyes Javier, looking into his eyes as he reads him. His own eyes soften as Javier bends down and nudges his arm, “scoot over.” He hears him say as y/n moves his arm onto his chest.

Javier groans as he lies down on his back, next to y/n as the two stare at the ceiling.

It’s silent for a few minutes until Javier decides to break the silence. “You know I missed you right?”

“That’s a little hard to believe, knowing that you’ve been gone for months and haven’t come back.” The teenager whispers out as he twiddles with his thumbs.

“Yeah? You know what was hard for me to believe?”

“What?”

“That you had a boyfriend for almost a year and I had to meet him by pointing a guy to his head, only to find out that maybe he’s not so bad.”

Y/n turns to glance at him and chuckles softly. “Yeah that sounds hard to believe.” This earns him a small laugh from javi.

The two go quiet again.

“I don’t want you to think that I don’t care about you—“ said Javier. “Hell kid I love you so much that I raised you on my own, your mother passed away at a young age and I was left alone to take care of you.”

“That’s not true, grandpa was there to help.”

“Okay what is this? Favoritism?” Javier sits up to glare down at his own kid, he sounded offended that his own kid would like his grandfather more than his father.

Y/n laughs with a small smile and shakes his head. “I’m just saying that grandpa had more expierence with children, meaning that he helped you with raising me, so half of the credit goes to grandpa.”

Javier groans with a roll of his eyes before lying back down. “Anyways, like I was saying—“ he adjusts his position and sighs. “Mitch told me everything, how you were excited to come to Colombia.”

“He wasn’t lying.” Y/n licks his lips and glanced over at the wine bottle. “Mitch knows me to well, I mean he works for the CIA so he’s very observant when it comes towards small things.”

“Yeah Tell me about it, because of him we were able to catch some of Escobars men.” Y/n gives him a faint smile. “So, you saying that you like Mitch?”

Javier goes silent before answering. “Maybe.”

“So that’s a yes?”

“I said maybe.”

Y/n laughs and shakes his head.

Javier laughs with him.

The two have missed this, being father and son. Being able to laugh together and joke around.

Y/n has missed his fathers confort, he remembers being younger and crawling into his fathers bed after a nightmare. Wanting to feel safe and at peace, he remembers the first time he cooked a perfect meal for the two, making him the cook in the small family that they were. He had so many happy memories, why has that suddenly changed?

“Hey dad?”

“Si, hijo?”

Y/n bites his lip. “When you come back home I want you back in once piece and when you return I’ll make you your favorite dish and make sure that grandpa doesn’t eat it all.”

This catches Javi off guard, he expected the other to pour out his own feelings but he knows that y/n isn’t the kind of person to talk about his feelings. He only allows that around certain people that he trusted.

Javier slowly smiles and nods. “Te lo prometo.” He says, promising to come back home.

“Gate A45 will be boarding people now—“

Y/n was standing by his gate, holding his bags as he faces his father, Steve, and Mitch.

“Take care of yourself.” Javier whispers as he pulls him into a hug. Y/n smiles and holds him tight before pulling away.

Steve smiled at the younger Pena. “Take care of yourself, kid.” Y/n smiles back. “You should be taking care of my dad, make sure he doesn’t knock up anyone else while I’m gone.”

“Ey—“

This earns a laugh from Steve. “I can’t keep any promises.”

“Eh, worth a try.” Y/n shrugs as he shakes Steve’s hand.

Once he’s done saying goodbye to the adults he turns to face Mitch. Smiling he approached his boyfriend and hugs him, burying his face into his neck as Mitch sighs against him. “Have a safe flight back and make sure you call me once you land.” He whispers.

Y/n nods and pulls away. “I will and please take care of my dad and make sure that he doesn’t try to kill himself while I’m back home. I don’t want to get a phone call from any of you guys telling me that he’s in the hospital for shooting hismelf.”

“That was one time!” He hears Javier say.

Y/n rolls his eyes. “I promise.” Mitch says as he leans down to kiss him deeply.

“Ey, Ey, enfrente de mi, no.”

Javier pulls y/n away from Mitch as he groans. “Dad.” He whines out.

“Not when I’m here.” He reminds him.

“So once he moves out you’ll be okay with us doing more than just kissing?” Said Mitch.

Javier points a finger at Mitch, giving him a warning. “Listen kid I’ve been patient with you for only a few hours but now you are getting on my nerves.”

Mitch smirks at Javier as y/n sighs. “Please don’t kill each other.”

“I’ll make sure they don’t.” Said Steve.

“Thanks Steve.”

“Last minute call for our flight to Houston, Texas—“

“I should really get going.” Y/n grips his bag close and steps back, waving goodbye to the three as he heads towards his gate. Showing his passport and ticket before giving his small family one last wave.

Javier waves back with a small smile, sighing as watches them close the door.

“Wow, I’ve never seen you this depressed.” Javier hears Steve say, patting him on the shoulder. “Hey once your kid is an adult you’ll know what I’m feeling.” He shot back. Steve shrugs and chuckles, “come on you two it’s time to head back. Y/n left me in charge in making sure that you two don’t kill each other.”

“Hear that grandpa? Your stuck with me for the next couple of days.” Said Mitch as he winks at him and walks further ahead.

Steve and Javier froze in spot as Steve narrows his eyes at Mitch. “Can I kill him?” Javier asks.

“Give him a 10 second head start, then I’ll allow you to kill him.”

Javier grins at his partner and looks up ahead to see Mitch walking further away from them before his ten seconds were up.

#javier pena x son reader #javier x male reader #javier pena #mitch rapp x male reader #mitch rapp #dylan o brien x male reader #pedro pascal x male reader #pedro pascal #dylan o brien

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fvaleraye · 3 years

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Just a Day

Hi hello hey :>

I decided to write something involving Alex today, bc I don’t write about my AFW OCs nearly as much as I should... they’re v good ;w; It’s not much? Just a short little peek into the life of Alex, and his daily happenings. He’s doing his best

As always, AFW is @artnerd1123‘s story, and y’all should check it out, it’s super good and she just wrote a new chapter today :>

The sun rose lazily over the horizon, bathing the trees and buildings in its bright orange glow. The day was starting, people were getting out of bed, getting ready for the day. Many were still in bed, though. Not everyone had a profession with a schedule. And not everyone wanted to get an early start to the day either. One sorcerer was still sound asleep in his apartment, for the time being. But not his familiar.

Lucy, the little ball of energy and sunshine that she was, almost always got an early start to her day. Mostly it was idle tidying up while waiting for her originator to wake up. Nothing major, unless there were things from the previous day that she decided to wait until the morning to actually do. But mostly it was just walking around with a duster a bit too big for her, getting all the dust out of the way. Sometimes she would pick up and reorganize books that her originator left lying around. Alex insisted she didn't have to, but the little familiar wanted to... she wanted to be helpful, and it gave her something to occupy herself with. Once the sun started to peek more over the land, Lucy slid back into the bedroom, where the blue-haired sorcerer still laid sound asleep. Her first instinct, as always, was to just hop up onto the bed and nudge him a bit. That didn't do much. Usually the cold of her face pressing against his side would wake him up, but either he was very asleep, or he was getting used to it. Her second course of action was to just open the curtains, letting the sunlight pour into the previously dim room. The sorcerer let out a tired groan, before shoving a pillow over his head. She hopped back up onto the bed, and gave him a little smile. "Rise and shiiiine, sleepyheeeaaaad!" She said, pressing her face against him again.

"... what time is it...?" Alex mumbled, peeking out from under the pillow.

"Time to get up!"

He just gave a sigh, shoving the pillow off his face. He slowly sat up, his cyan hair a complete mess, bags under his eyes, and just looking like he wanted to go back to bed. This was about how he felt every morning. He pressed his hands against his eyes, rubbing them for a moment, and pushing his bangs out of his face. He gave Lucy a quick little pet on the head, and pushed himself out of bed with a groan. He grabbed his glasses from the nightstand as he stood up. Had to get ready for the day at some point.

He grabbed some clothes from the dresser- nothing fancy, just a shirt, some pants, and his binder, he wasn't going anywhere today- and tiredly shambled over to the bathroom. The first thing he did was toss his new clothes aside for the moment, turn on the sink, and just splash a bit of water in his face to try and wake himself up a bit. After a moment, he looked into the mirror, took a deep breath, and sighed. Now that he was a bit more awake, he went about fairly mundane early morning things. Brushing his teeth, getting his binder on, brushing his hair, changing clothes, nothing unusual. After a bit, he opened up a cabinet on the wall, and grabbed a bottle. It was full of a clear-ish liquid, and had a white label. It looked to be some sort of medicinal potion. He opened it up, poured it into a little cup, and downed quickly, cringing and making a face as it went down. Medicine never tasted great. But it was good for him... half the reason he was able to get out of bed, honestly. He stepped out, and walked down the hallway, this time with a bit more energy. Not a lot more, but he was waking up. That was something. He wandered around to the kitchen, and opened up some cabinets... ... they were quite bare, actually. ... guess I am gonna have to go somewhere today...

"Hey Lucy?" He called into the hallway, prompting the little familiar to peek around the corner. "I'm gonna head to the market, pick some stuff up really quick, you wanna come?"

"Sure!!!" She replied, practically bouncing over to his side. He gave a little chuckle at her enthusiasm.

He took a moment to just get a pair of shoes on, and grabbed his cloak from the cloak hanger. Once it was on his shoulders, the little one climbed right up and nestled into his hood. He let out a small sigh, grabbed his little bag of coins, and stepped out of the apartment. The walk out of the building was uneventful, as would the rest of the trip, hopefully. He waved at a few people who greeted him, but mostly just kept to himself. It was still... a pretty new town. He hadn't been here long. Merchant town, though, so you could find almost anything you wanted. As long as you waited long enough for a merchant selling what you wanted to stroll into town. Thankfully all the pair wanted today was food. That wasn't exactly a rarity. The streets were mostly empty today, it was a weekend morning, so the only people up at this hour were merchants either setting up or taking down stalls in the market, or their customers. The market itself was not very quiet, but it was still less of a crowd this early. That was nice. As long as I don't get called "ma'am", this'll be a pretty okay day... He tried his best to keep all his time at the stalls as brief as he could. Just picking up some groceries... meat, vegetables, baking supplies, some fruit juice he could freeze into little flavored cubes for Lucy. The usual stuff. Everyone was always cordial, some more convincingly than others. By the time he was done, he had two bags slinged over his shoulders, and his coinpurse was noticeably lighter. More people were starting to come out into the streets, which just made him want to get home faster. He really, really wasn't in the mood to deal with a crowd today. But, of course, he couldn't go back home without at least taking a peek at the questboard. It was like any other questboard: just a big wooden board where people put things for questors to do. Requests to find things, investigate certain areas, help take things from point A to point B... more of the same. No new dungeons today. Dungeons were slow recently. Kind of disappointing. But it was fine. He wasn't looking for more things to do today.

The walk back home was mercifully just as uneventful as the walk out. Lucy hopped out of Alex's cloak as he set it back onto the hanger, and the two got all the groceries out of the bags to put them up. It took a few minutes, of course, but they were done in no time. Now they could eat breakfast. After spending a minute or so looking at the food and trying to figure out what to eat, he eventually settled on some bacon. The little one wanted a sundae, which he decided to oblige before starting on his own food. She was sitting on the couch, enjoying her food, while he was getting a few bacon strips prepared. He honestly wasn't that hungry... but breakfast was important. He couldn't skip it. Just a little food would do. Once they looked nice and done, he got himself a plate, and sat down at the table. He just sort of prodded at it with a fork until his appetite decided to exist. Normally he was a big eater... but it was one of those slow days. Sometimes it was like that, and there wasn't exactly a reason for it. And that was okay. Once he was done, he stared at his empty plate, trying to figure out where to go from here. He didn't have any plans... besides sitting at home and possibly taking a nap.

... maybe I could write that guy I met at the library. He thought to himself, glancing at the hallway.

Yeah.

That was something he could do.

Lucy was still enjoying her sundae, so he had some time to kill. He stepped back into his room, still bright with the sun, but less so now that the sun was beginning to rise and not sit directly in front of the window. He pulled up a chair and sat down at his desk. It was a bit messy, covered in papers and maps and his own notes. He had been trying to reason out how exactly dungeons work and the ways to get them to pop up. He hadn't quite figured it out. Magic was a fickle and mysterious thing. Maybe there was a book about it. He brushed aside some of the clutter and pulled out an empty piece of paper. A brief blue fog washed over the inkwell across the desk as it slid over to his hand, the quill alongside it. He dipped into the ink a few times and tapped his chin as he thought about what to write.

Dear Journal

I hope you're doing alright. I just wanted to write really quickly, I didn't have much happening today. I just finished reading that adventure book series you recommended, great stuff. I feel like it kinda fell off near the end, though. I think the writer might have just been trying to extend the story more than they should have. I think it would have been better if it ended on the third book, would have been more satisfying. Overall though, it was okay. I hope you like the dragon facts book I recommended. I know a lot of it is probably common knowledge by now, but it's still fascinating. By the way, I was hoping you could maybe find me a book on the intricacies of dungeons and what their patterns are, if any? You don't have to, of course, but I'm trying to make notes and a book like that would make my life a lot easier. If it doesn't exist, or just isn't there, that's fine. I just don't know when the next time I'll be able to stop by the library is, so I wanted to ask. I promise I'll repay the favor if you pull that off.

Signed, Alex.

"... that'll work." He mumbled, setting the quill aside. He folded up the paper, tied it up, and whispered a few words to it. A moment later, it disappeared in a little puff of blue fog, hopefully to its destination. He pushed himself away from the desk, and started to stand up. He wasn't sure what else he was going to do today... Maybe he could just hang out and talk with Lucy for a bit. That sounded nice.

#Valerie Writes #AFW #Alex #Lucy #i am happy with how this turned out...#even if it's short...#short but sweet... wholesome #i hope y'all like it!#and; as with the last thing i wrote; belle proofread it for me and helped edit #bc they're super good and helpful like that #ty again for that; sib...

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unabashedhottubearthquake-blog1 · 3 years

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Thesis Writing Made Easy - Creating an Outline For Your Thesis

Thesis writing is very different from other types of writing. This is because when you write a thesis proposal, you are required to write an introduction, a thesis statement and three additional papers. The introduction is the most important part because it draws the attention of the readers to your thesis topic and more importantly, it sets the stage for what the rest of your research will be all about. The introduction should be comprehensive and should answer all the questions that the reader has before he/she reads any further. If you fail in this, there will be no enjoyment Reading Your Thesis Proposal.

The next part in thesis writing is the thesis statement. This is also the most important section of the thesis. It is not as difficult as you think since there are certain rules and procedures that you have to follow. However, there are still some things that you should remember in writing a thesis statement. For instance, you must make sure that the thesis statement adheres to the given rules of grammar.

After the introduction is done, it is time to write the thesis. This is probably the hardest part in thesis writing, since it entails a lot of planning and lengthy research. Nevertheless, it is also one of the most satisfying parts. In writing a thesis, you must know how to formulate a reasonable proposal. You can either get started with your research right away or you can start drafting a proposal after getting all the necessary information and data.

Many people prefer to get started with their thesis writing while they are still in the process of completing their research papers. But if you want to be able to finish the whole project on time, you need to take extra time to write your thesis statement. In order to make it easier for you, there are two ways to do this: either you have it written down or you copy the entire thing from scratch. While it is true that thesis statements take more time to write compared to research papers, it is a worthy task that deserves your full attention.

In order to make your thesis writing faster and simpler, here's a tip: make sure that you have a good grasp of Russian. Whether you are writing a review on or researching about the history of Russian words, you must make sure that you understand every single word. And if you are unsure about a word, ask someone who speaks both languages to correct you. This way, you won't be confused and you will get your research papers written in no time.

Once you are done with the writing part, it is now time for you to write your introduction. In fact, many students skip this step, thinking that the introduction is just a formality and it doesn't really matter what they write about. However, the introduction is perhaps the most important part of any thesis proposal. It is your chance to let the readers know about your topic and what makes you different from other writers. So make sure that your introduction gives them a brief summary of your paper and maybe some insights on how they can help your topic.

After the introduction, you can move onto the next section - the conclusion. The conclusion is also known as the bibliography, and it lists all the resources and references that you used in your research paper. If you used special software to create your data or if you wrote an essay or a study based on previous researches, you should put these sources in the bibliography section.

The last section to your outline is your discussion of your thesis proposal. This part might take a bit longer than the other sections, so make sure you put plenty of time into it. Basically, you should go over your idea and explain why it is worth studying. Adding examples of related cases is a good way to illustrate how your research works in reality, and adding graphs and diagrams is another great way to show the accuracy of your hypothesis.

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turning-dreams-into-chaos · 5 years

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I’m Out

*Not My Gif*

Post Date: 7-29-19

Paring: Peter Parker x Reader

Word Count: 2.8K

A/N: so I’ve hit major writers block in a few of y’alls requests so stay with me as I write things I want to for a little while. 😂 love you all!

-Ria

~Master List~

~Prompt List~

“Ok, next question. If you could work with only one Avenger for the rest of your life who would it be?” Peter asked as you dangled your legs off the building next to him fully dressed in both of your suits. You sat there pretending to ponder his question as his spider-eyes widened, disbelieving the fact you actually had to think of the answer. You turned to look at him, letting out a laugh before shaking your head.

“I’m kidding! Obviously it’s Tony. He’s the only one who doesn’t treat me like a kid on the field.” You mumbled, grinning like, well a kid, as Peter nodded his head. He understood, you had been an official member of the avengers since you learnt how to control your powers. You could read or manipulate minds when you touch someone, it’s hard to control and most definitely when your emotions are on high but you have been training with Wanda to keep it together. It also worked both ways, if you couldn’t keep it together when you were touching someone then they get in your mind and mess it up. Memories, thoughts, feelings, if you could see it in their minds then they could see it in yours. Wanda had been an excellent teacher but you she didn’t quite understand, it was way to difficult to control all the time. Peter understood, he knew how to calm you down when you were worked up and knew not to touch you in those moments. He was your best friend and he was the one person you trusted the most. He loved that fact, always priding himself when you let yourself loose around him, holding onto his arms or wrapping yours around his neck while you stood behind him, you were containing your powers but those were the moments he kept his feelings in the back of his mind, knowing that if you faltered for a second and read his mind you would discover his secret. Not the fact that he was Spider-Man, you already knew that. This secret was one that no one knew.

Peter Parker was in love with you.

It was moments like this he loved the most, when Peter finished patrol and you made your way to his apartment after a mission or something, both of you dressed in your suits as you talked the night away. The night sky was calming against your chatters, a nice presence embracing you both as you turn to look at Peter at the same time he looked at you. It wasn’t weird to look at Peter like this, his spider mask covering his face and your black latex mask clinging onto yours, covering around your eyes then down to your cheeks, throughly hiding your identity. You wanted a normal life, go to school with Peter, have an alias on missions, you didn’t want the public to know who you were. Tony understood completely, the only people knowing your identity were the team and important people like Fury.

“You know, I wish we could do this more often.” You whispered as your eyes casted off into the distance. Peter didn’t say anything, only nodding his head as he smiled at you. Your hand came up to move your mask a little, hating how it felt on your face. Tony said he would make you a new one but for now you had to wear this one which was not the best.

“Why don’t you just take it off? I mean, I don’t think anyone’s going to see you up here and it’s too dark to actually see.” You thought about Peter’s suggestion while you tapped your fingers against the cool concrete below you. No one would see you and the night time would help hide you, sounded like wishful thinking. You took off the mask, not catching the way Peter’s face softened and smile grew at your face finally coming out because his suit hid his expressions.

“Ugh, finally! I feel like I can move my face!” You cheered as you both fell into a fit of laughter. You stopped first, secretly admiring the boy even through his suit. See the thing is, Peter Parker might be in love with you, but you were absolutely in love with him. No doubt about it. Your eyes widened, shaking out the thoughts before clapping your hands together. “Ok! Next Question!”

The rest of the night went just like that until you headed home, and by morning you wanted nothing more than to stay cuddled in your blankets but you need to get to school. You were ready in under an hour, slinging your bag over your shoulder as you jumped into the car with Happy at the wheel. Like every morning, he drove you to Peter’s where you would then walk to school with him. You didn’t mind the walk, how could you ever mind spending more time with Peter. You climbed up the steps to his apartment before you opened the door without knocking. No one really minded, you were practically family at this point and they didn’t care if you just entered.

“Y/N? Is that you?” Peter called from somewhere in the house, most likely the bathroom. You giggled as you threw your bag down on the couch.

“No, it’s a murderer!” You yelled back before checking your watch. You still had 20 minutes before you had to leave Peter’s. You heard his laugh from the bathroom as the water started running, meaning he was just getting into the shower.

“Ok! You can kill me when I get out of the shower! May made muffins!” You smiled as you skipped to the kitchen counter grabbing a blueberry one and eating it faster than you thought possible.

“I’m watching TV!” Peter yelled back an ok as you flopped onto the couch, throwing your feet up before grabbing the remote. The news started playing right away as you shrugged, biting into another muffin.

“This just in, we have news relating to the famous Y/H/N’s identity.” The news caster began as you chocked out your muffin, turning in your seat to see the pictures on the screen. One was you and Peter last night sitting on the rooftop both hidden behind masks as you smiled at each other. But the one that got your attention most was the one on the right, a picture taken right after you took your mask off, revealing your face to the world. Your heart dropped and you felt like you weren’t breathing. Peter felt like something was wrong, he wasn’t sure what but he quickly shut off the water and wrapped himself in a towel. He pulled back the bathroom door to see you staring at the TV screen he couldn’t see from that angle. You looked like you were breaking down but you weren’t doing anything. Peter took caution, slowly walking up next to you before turning to look at the TV.

Peter didn’t say anything, he didn’t know what how to make this better.

“I’m out. P-Pete,” Your words came out in a jumble as you finally felt like you could breath again, but this time your breathing way to fast. Your eyes flashed between the screen and Peter’s as you kept trying to talk. “I’m out. I-I-I can’t be... Peter... They have pictures... I’m out, I’m out, I’m out. I’m out.” Peter couldn’t think either, he truly didn’t know what to do and you were freaking out. You had started to pace back and forth and without even thinking Peter grabbed both of your arms as your eyes settled on his. If steam could come out of your ears it would.

“Y/N, it’ll be ok-“

“Don’t touch me!” You yelled as you accidentally let him in. Peter saw your mind. You tried not to think about him but it didn’t work. He couldn’t let go, to enticed by what he was seeing as you tried to think about anything but him. It didn’t work, images of Peter coming through more and more. Times when you and him were studying in his place or the tower and you threw snacks at each other, watching movies when you fell asleep in his arms, and when Your arms were wrapped around his neck as you both flew throughout the city. Your eyes were shut as Peter finally pulled apart from you. He didn’t know what to think. He felt like it was all his fault. He told you to take off the mask, he convinced you that no one was around to watch, he told you that no one could see you, and he was the one that went into your mind. He believed it was his fault.

“How can we fix this? We’ll talk to Mr. Stark! Or- Or-“

“Pete.”

“-We could talk to Fury.-“

“Pete.”

“Mr. Stark can go on the news, take it all back.”

“Peter!” You whispered, grabbing his face in your hands. You had a grasp on your powers again and even if you didn’t you couldn’t care anymore, he already saw your mind. “I’m out. My identity’s out. There’s no taking it back. These pictures they can’t take it back. I’m nothing now! I’m ruined.” Your breath hitched as your head fell onto Peter’s chest. He was fast to wrap his arms around you, leaning his head down onto yours as he thought about what to you. You were right, there was nothing to do. “I gotta go.” You whispered as you pushed away from Peter and grabbed your bag.

“Where are you going? We have school.”

“Yeah and Pete I don’t feel like being questioned from all our friends about my powers or my position on the team. That’s why I wanted a normal life, I didn’t want... I didn’t want this.” You left his apartment making your way back to the tower and texting Happy to pick you up along the way. Your hoodie was pulled tight over your head, something you never had to do when you weren’t Y/H/N, something you never wanted to do. Happy pulled up next to you as you got in without saying anything. He knew of course. He saw the news as soon as he got out of the car from dropping you off. He didn’t saw anything either, looking at your red eyes from where you held back tears and knowing that nothing could make this better for you.

You were out of the car before he could even stop it, dashing up towards your room. Everyone was in the living room watching the news over and over again as Nat yelled at Tony who yelled the exact same thing she said over the phone. No one noticed you as you flew on by, everyone to preoccupied with everything going on. You hit your bed with so much force you thought you were going to break it as you wept. You didn’t know how long you were crying for but at some point you just became numb, tears stopping as you sat up, leaning your back against the headrest and pulling your knees up. Time seemed to slow as you looked at yourself in the mirror. You knew it was stupid to cry over this but you needed to. All you wanted was to just be normal and you found out you had powers it was ripped out from under you until Tony told you you could keep your powers a secret, only to have some kid with a camera to ruin your life.

When your window opened up with a squeak your head shot up only to see Peter climbing through in his suit.

“Peter! My window is not a fucking door!” You laughed and wiped away the last of your tears. Peter ripped his mask off and you realized he had been crying too, you made him cry and it hurt even more. “I’ll be ok Pete. There’s no need to cry over it.” You assured him as he took a seat next to you in your bed. When he shook his head you got confused. He grabbed your hand, bringing it into his lap as you sat in silence. You wanted to ask what was bothering him but you didn’t want to intrude. It turns out being able to enter someone’s mind has taught you a thing or two about asking about feelings.

“I’m sorry. It was my fault. All of it.” He whispered as you began to rub the back of his hand. Peter felt the warmth coming from your touch, he loved the feeling so much. His eyes gazed up to your profile, seeing the puffiness from your most recent cry as well as the streaks following them. “Read my mind.”

You whipped your head to him. No one ever asked you to read their minds besides Wanda who only did it to teach you. This was all new. He was welcoming it?

“Pete-“

“Just do it.” You nodded your head, relaxing as you looked into his bloodshot eyes. He cried more than you thought he did. The first thing you saw in his mind was his living room, you staring at the TV screen. You wanted to let go of his hand, let the memory fade away but you didn’t, instead letting it go on.

“I’m nothing now! I’m ruined.” The memory you shouted as you felt Peter’s heart break. It pained him, your words pained him more than you thought it would. The memory was gone as another appeared. It was last night after you took your mask off and Peter was watching you. You felt his emotions again, happiness was the main one but you couldn’t figure out. The next memory came, it was when you were studying and you had gotten a question wrong and couldn’t figure it out. Peter was quick to help you, moving his body right next to you as he looked over your shoulder. When you finally figured it out you turned to peer over your shoulder, face inches apart from Peter’s as you met his eyes. You felt Peter’s heart race, that same feeling coming back. The memories changed again. It was you standing next to Tony, wearing a tank top and shorts. You were yawning, having just woke up as Tony wanted to introduce you to Peter.

“This is Y/N. She can read your mind. Don’t let her touch you or it can be dangerous.” Tony joked with a way more serious face than necessary. You turned up to glare at him before facing Peter again.

“He’s lying. Well kind of. I can read minds when I want to but I’m not dangerous.” You said nudging Tony when you crossed your arms. He let out a laugh as Peter relaxed. You gave him a smile as the feeling coursed through him again.

All the memories you’ve seen with you and him, so many emotions. Happy, sad, anger, stress, all the basics and then that one feeling that occurred in every single memory.

It made sense now. You knew that feeling. It was the same feeling you had whenever you were with him. Love.

You let go of Peter’s hand, seeing fresh tears falling from his eyes and you sure you were doing the same.

“You’re not nothing. You’re never nothing.” He whispered as he began to lean into you. You closed the distance as your lips met and your hand came up to hold his cheek. It made sense, it made complete sense as you pulled apart and saw the love in his eyes that matched yours.

“I’ve spent my entire life, pretending to be someone I’m not. But when i’m with you, I just get to be me. I get to be human.” You whispered as you bit your lip. Peter put his head against yours and your breathing was the only thing in the room. You didn’t go into his mind, you didn’t need to, you knew what was in there and he already saw yours, he knew how you felt. But just in case. “I love you.”

Peter’s smile could light up the room, he let out a tiny laugh as he pecked your lips again. “I know.”

“You dork! Did you just quote Star Wars?” You asked pulling away. He started to blush a little as you found yourself giggling. “You know what, this was a mistake.”

Peter grabbed your hand as you got off the bed, trying to hide the smirk on your face but failing. “Oh this wasn’t a mistake. I know you love me. And you know you love me.” Now you let him pull you back to the bed, wrapping an arm around you. “Will get through this Y/N. I promise.”

You nodded your head as you shifted to look up at him. You smirked as you leaned into his kiss. “I know.”

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morallygreyprompts · 5 years

Note

[Villain] ends up with a child in their care much to their dismay. And due to being raised in an environment where parental warmth and care was lacking, they at first kind of ignore the child. However, after awhile they begin to find themselves caring for the child more than they expected? And it turns out the child was also brought up in an environment similar to them? \(✧ヮ✧)/🎊 I’m going to take this opportunity to say congrats on 5K! 🎊\(✧ヮ✧)/

This idea is too precious to convey over a few snippets but I hope I did okay. Thank you for your wait and thank you very much! I’d loved to have written more for this but alas my eyes are STILL hurting like crazy. You can always ask for a continuation and that’ll get you some good fluff.

This starts straight up with a murder, so skip the first section if you’re wanting to avoid blood and bodies and all that fun stuff- I’m a crime writer at heart, don’t judge me.

Villain’s henchmen wrestled Civilian to the ground in front of the Villain. “You betrayed my trust and stole from me. You killed my men and very nearly had my whole operations uncovered,” Villain seethed. “All for what?” “Profit,” Civilian seethed, “You’re scum, [Villain], you’re draining this city and it’s high time someone stopped you!”

Villain produced a gun and pressed it against their forehead, watching Civilian gulp. “We’re just the same. I’ve stopped you, but me? I invite anyone to try.”

The shot rang out and Civilian fell back, dead, their blood and fragments of their head splattering onto the back wall. The Henchmen let them drop and blood pooled on the floor. Villain cleared their throat and looked away from the mess. “Search the place, see if there’s anything valuable we can take with us.”

Villain waited by the door, glancing at the dead body in the room, checking they were in fact dead. This justice had come years too late for Villain’s liking, especially with all the unspeakable crimes Civilian had committed. They had deserved far worse than a gunshot. Villain wasn’t able to dwell on it.

“Boss?!”

Villain sighed and approached the henchman who stuck their head out one of the doors. They entered their room wordlessly but paused upon seeing two bright eyes hiding under the bed.

“A kid? Damn it!” Villain hissed. “Come out of there.”

The child obeyed faster than Villain expected. They rushed out from their hiding place and stood in front of Villain, their head down and ringing out their hands. “Good,” Villain frowned. “Now I suppose I’m going to have to take you with me… hmph, go and pack your rucksack over there with your favourite toys. [Henchman], help them out- and don’t let them leave this room.”

They didn’t like how they were behaving, how easily they had taken to strangers and how they did everything they were told without hesitation. No, Villain didn’t like it. It reminded them too much of themselves, doing everything they could to avoid the belt- Villain shook themselves out of it. That wasn’t important, but the child’s obedience meant it was going to be far easier to get them out of their home without seeing their parent dead in the next room. Villain didn’t know what they were going to do with them after that.

Packing didn’t take long, considering how sparsely furnished the room was. Henchman carried the rucksack, while Villain took the duvet off the bed and approached the child. “Shh, keep quiet for me.”

The child stepped back in fear but didn’t seem to dare speak. “Don’t be frightened,” Villain added. They wrapped the kid up tight, ignoring them as they tried to squirm out of Villain’s grip. “Hey!“

Wrapped and secure, Villain carefully carried them out of the house and to the waiting car. Henchmen were filling the boot full of valuables. Villain glanced to the tiny rucksack in one of the Henchmen’s hands and back to the valuables. “Someone had their priorities right,” they muttered.

Now safe from the grizzly scene, Villain moved the blanket away and sat down in the front. With no car seat, there was no choice but for Villain to keep them on their lap, and put the duvet over them to keep them warm.

“You’re not a monster, are you, sir/miss?”

“Yes,” Villain answered without thinking. The child cowered in their arms, so Villain corrected themselves. “But only to nasty, naughty boys and girls. I’m taking you to my house to look after you for a few days. Sit quietly now, go to sleep, it’s late.”

That eased their fears a little, and by the time the Henchmen finished up, the child had fallen asleep in their arms. They had a cute little face, but Villain’s arms were starting to ache already. They grumbled to themselves as their men piled back into the car. “Let’s go. When we get back, [Henchman], I want you to find them a bed and something to eat if they need it. I need some time alone to fix this little… setback.”

____________

The days turned into weeks. Villain didn’t know who to give the kid to, and Villain feared the orphanages would ask too many questions. But the child behaved and did as they were told, so keeping them wasn’t too much of an issue, as long as they were careful about what the kid could see.

As they slept that night, they felt someone touch their arm. They jolted awake, and jumped a second time seeing the kid stood next to them with a tear-washed face. “What is it, kid? Go back to bed, draw or something. I stole you some more toys, what more do you want?”

“I had a nightmare,” they said quietly.

Villain let out an irritated sigh and wiped their face. “Come on,” they grumbled. “Back to bed.”

Villain guided them back to their room and tucked them in half-heartedly. “I’ll leave your lamp on, alright? Now go to sleep.” They tried to walk away but the child gripped their sleeve.

“Please don’t go. I. I’m scared.”

Something so simple took Villain aback. Until now the child had barely asked for comfort, only a companion to play with. The fear in their eyes reflected Villain hadn’t expected to see; themselves. That same independence, same perfect behaviour. It had been clear at home they hadn’t been given five-star parenting. It tugged at a heartstring Villain had long since thought snapped.

“Go to sleep,” Villain said gently, hesitantly stroking their hair. “Tomorrow, I’ll take you to the park, change things up for you.”

The light that shone in the child’s face didn’t just tug at their heartstring, it yanked it cleanout. “The park! Really?” They clapped and giggled with excitement, kicking their legs under the blanket. They grinned so much their face must have ached. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“Alright, calm down. What you’ve never been to the park before?”

“Nope! Oooooh, I’m so excited!”

While usually such a fuss would have only wound Villain up and made them want to tell them to be quiet, they couldn’t. They smiled. Damnit, this kid was just far too excited. They remembered being this excited for school trips to something as simple as the library. Considering Villain had made them technically an orphan, they decided they may as well make the kid’s life a little happier.

“Alright, alright! Jeez, go to sleep now. I’ll buy you an ice cream too, but you need to settle down now. For the last time, go to sleep.”

The child shuffled down in the blanket and scrunched their eyes shut, barely able to contain themselves. At least the excitement seemed to have made them forget about their bad dream. Villain left the lamp on just in case and left the room to make arrangements for the next day.

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thememoriesofaqueen · 4 years

Text

The Things We Do - Part 9

Masterlist (x)

A/N: Finally, the Kalijah-Reunion is happening. I hope you enjoy it! Thanks to all the messages and anons who gave me a lot of inspiration. ♥ I’m also kinda nervous about this chapter so please be nice to me. English is not my first language → I do not own anything of the TVD - Universe and I’m not affiliated or associated with the writers etc. this is only a headcanon.

Pairing: Kalijah ( Katherine / Elijah )

Setting: post TVD 4x23, no cured Katherine.

TW: -

Word Count: 9.106

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`·.¸¸.·´´¯`··._.· At the same time `·.¸¸.·´´¯`··._.·

It was early in the morning when he got up, just like every day. He stayed up way too long, got up too early and therefore didn’t exactly get the right amount of sleep. Even if he did get some sleep, his sleep mostly wasn't really restful, often being unable to shake the images of Katerina off. He still managed to keep going, as sleep wouldn’t find him – fortunately, a vampire doesn’t need as much sleep as a mortal, anyway.

He didn’t really like to make use of the heavy curtains, so he usually finds his way to his bathroom when the first early sun rays lighten up his room, in winter even before that. He showered and shaved, doing the same procedur and morning routine as every day. When he returned from his bathroom with only a towel covering his body, he made his way to his wardrobe, which contained various suits and - how was it called these days? - accessories. He is certain that his wardrobe has a large dimension for a man’s standard, but he didn’t mind it and ignored his sister’s jokes about it as well. A man should always be properly dressed, therefore he had to have a selection of what he is going to wear. He picked a dark blue suit, a white shirt and fitting cufflinks before he started to dress himself. When he was finished, he picked a matching tie and belt, closed his jacket and neatly folded a handkerchief, which he put into his jacket. He checked on his appearance and styled his hair until he was content with his look. It may appear as vain, but he attached importance to his appearance.

Once he was fully dressed, he opened the double wing door and stepped outside, enjoying the warm sun rays on his skin. His balcony gave him a beautiful view over the French Quarter. He could watch the sun rise and appreciated the quiet enviroment. New Orleans is always loud, full of music and artists.

But right now, everything is quiet and still asleep. Even Niklaus. Only the birds are singing. Those peaceful moments are rare, so he always chooses to enjoy them. He went back inside but left the double wing door open, intending to let some fresh air in. He left his room quickly in order to get himself a blood bag, only to return a few seconds later. Despite being a vampire, he had an aversion of biting someone. It isn’t uncivilized and he isn’t a barbarian. Moreover he didn't like being strained with blood nor the sound of screaming people. He opened the blood bag carefully and poured its content in a glass before going to his desk and sitting down. Having seated himself, he grabbed one of his books he liked to read in the morning and sipped on his glass, drinking a bit of blood every now and then.

Usually, reading something is a good way to take his mind somewhere else, away from his sorrows, away from New Orleans and away from her. His dreams about her haven’t faded away and even tonight she had been present in his dreams like a ghost whose only purpose is to haunt him. Consequently, reading isn’t only a good way to start the day, it also helps to stop thinking about those dreams.

He had just finished the third chapter when the buzzing of his phone disturbed the silence. The display of his phone lightened up for a moment, but he ignored it. It was probably just a message from one of his observers, telling him if everything had been okay. It’s always necessary to know about what is going on in the city in order to maintain control. However, he wasn’t in the mood to be disturbed so early in the morning. He wanted to enjoy the peace for another ten minutes before he’ll throw himself into work again. That’s why he finished his glass of blood and started the next chapter.

Unfortunately, the book wasn’t able to capture his attention anymore, something has changed, he couldn’t focus anymore. Something gave him a weird feeling, making him nervous. His heart fluttered and with a quiet sound, he closed his book shut and stood up, wandering around. Out of sudden, he felt restless, strained. Something wasn’t right, something was out of place. But what was it?

He went to his balcony and watched the streets, but everything was normal, the first humans began to roam the streets and filled it with life again. He sighed and closed the double wing door. What was it what made him feel so nervous? It certainly hadn’t happened before. If he hadn't known better, he would describe the feeling like an invisible visitor who is watching him in his room. But that couldn't be. The compound is protected. He stopped and used his supernatural hearing to check the compound. However, everything was normal. Everyone was still asleep, he could hear the even breaths. That knowledge calmed him a little bit, knowing that his family is safe. Nevertheless his internal nervousness didn’t fade away. It’s like he is expecting something to happen, like he subconsciously prepares for something. His gaze roamed through his room before it landed on his phone. There has been a message a few minutes ago. Although a simple message shouldn’t fill him with unease, right?

He frowned and approached his desk whereupon his phone laid. The first thing he does after he waking up, even before going to the bathroom, is checking his phone (and secretly hoping there is a certain message waiting for him). There hadn’t been a single message or notification this morning, so he just assumed that the incoming message was the one of one of his observers. But what if it hadn’t been like that? What if…?

His fingertips thumped onto the mahogany surface of his desk, being unsure of what to do, didn't want to make a fool out of himself. Then, however, he slowly reached out for his phone and unlocked it. He tensed when he saw he got a message coming from an unknown number and held his breath when he opened it, a part of him wondering what has gotten into him. His heart was beating faster than normal and his eyes widened when he read the message. And he re-read it again and again.

‘It took some time but I’m ready now. Meet me in in three weeks at 8pm at the place you’ve shown me and where the past and present have collided.’

He opened his mouth in shock and sat down, his gaze still lingering at the message.

“Kat-” he mumbled but didn’t dare to speak out her name.

Even if everyone is supposed to be asleep, he didn’t dare to speak out her name, even though he so desperately wanted to. Katerina. For four years and three months he hadn’t heard a single thing about and from her. He had accepted her wish and let her be, hoping that one day she would forgive him.

Sure, the message did nowhere mention her name. Nevertheless he was certain that it was her. Not only because she likes to leave cryptic messages, but also because he knew exactly what place she was referring to. It can only be her.

His Katerina.

He couldn’t help but starting to picture her. Her warm brown eyes, her beautiful laugh, her rich brown curls. For the first time in years when he was thinking of her, he wasn’t haunted by the hatred and disappointment she held for him or by the pain he had caused her. No, all he could imagine was her being happy to see him or rather, her wanting to see him. He didn’t know for sure if she is going to forgive him, if she is going to give him another chance. Given by the location she had chosen, however, he was certain she wouldn’t try to stake him. Although he had to be careful to not turn too hopeful. After all, Katerina always managed to surprise him.

His fingertips caressed the touchscreen and for one moment he was tempted to just call her. Finally having the chance to hear her voice again. She wouldn’t like it – if she had had a desire to talk to him, she would have called. He has to be patient. What are another three weeks? Three weeks are nothing compared to his lifespan, compared to how long he has already waited for her.

He re-read the message again before finally putting his phone away. The initial nervousness has turned into some other kind of feeling. Anticipation, longing and happiness. It is childish to describe it as having these famous butterflies in his stomach, but the sensation of meeting her again, of her actually wanting to see him was overwhelming. He found himself smiling, feeling much lighter. It was like one of those heavy things which used to burden him has vanished.

He stood up and placed the book he wanted to read back into his bookshelf. His concentration is gone and it would have been a shame to just skip-read a good book. Instead, he grabbed another book and opened it on a certain page. That’s where he had kept the only picture he has in possession of them. Safe and unseen for others, only for him to know. His smile grew brighter when he looked at it, at them. Soon enough she will grace his presence again and this time he won’t make a mistake. He won’t hold back how much she means to him, how much he loves her if she let’s him show his affection. He will not lose her again. If she is willing to give him another chance, he will try everything to make her happy.

He carefully closed the book with the picture inside of it, placed it back and starting to hum a little melody. His gaze wandered to the piano in his room, the one he intented to keep safe from Niklaus’s rage because the piano down the hall tends to get destroyed. He wanted to play it, wanted to fill the compound with music. However, he hesitated. Being very well aware of the fact that his sudden high mood would raise suspection, he figured it is the best if he expresses his good mood in a not so obvious way. He reminded himself that he needed to be careful.

Just as he had that thought, he heard steps, soft voices from below. How much time has passed? With a look on his watch he saw that it was already 7am. By now, he should be downstairs, helping his sister with Hope’s breakfast. A heavy sign escaped his lips as he tried to hide his feelings and returning to a calm, controlled appereance. Even though Rebekah knows about his relationship with Katerina and his longing regarding her, it’s better to not let anyone know. His sister would never tell anyone about it, especially not Niklaus, but it’s better to not let anyone have a bargaining chip over him. Things can get heated in this house and sometimes it is possible that things are said out of anger. He wouldn’t want to risk it.

Putting on a straight face, he left his room and went downstairs.

„Good morning Elijah“ Rebekah greeted him and let her brother kiss her cheek shorly before he placed a kiss on Hope’s forehead.

„Good morning sister.“

She watched him leaning on the door frame after he had greeted them. She didn’t mind his presence and continued to watch Hope eating her breakfast. It’s unbelievable how time flies. Elijah watched for a while, placing his hands in his pockets.

„Do you know where Niklaus is?“ he asked, causing Rebekah to lift her gaze.

„He talked about getting some paint and brushes. Apparently he wants to show Hope how to draw.“ she shrugged,

„But don’t ask me where he went to. Why?“

Nik seemed to be in a fantastic mood, so it’s better to let him do whatever he wanted to do. In addition, she thinks it’s actually cute that Nik wanted to bond with his daughter over a peaceful thing. He had changed ever since Hope was born, even though that doesn’t mean he will not loose his temper if he sees so fit.

„Where were you anyway? Don’t tell me you overslept.“

The thought was rather amusing, given the fact that Elijah is as punctual as a clock. When Hope has finished her breakfast, she took the plate and the child’s cutlery and put it in the sink. One of the maids will clean it.

„I received a call coming from my company in NYC. They required my presence for a few days in three weeks.“ he answered calmly.

A lie, but it was necessary. He needed an excuse to go away for a few day without anyone doubting his agenda.

„Your company. Yeah, I remember. What is your company doing again?“ she asked incidentally, ripping of a grape and placing it in her mouth.

„They are involved in health system, working closely together with hospitals and-“

„Didn’t know you have an interest in health care. That’s odd for a vampire.“ but who knows, perhaps her brother has a hidden talent?

Doctor Mikaelson had a nice ring. Not that she couldn’t understand it, given she had worked as a nurse during World War I.

„Contrary to popular belief, I don’t invest all of my money into my suits.“ a little smile played along his lips.

He values human life and didn’t mind giving money to hospitals and other charitys. Perhaps it’s questionable for a vampire to do such thing, but he never intended to be a monster. In addition, he had enough money, why not spend it on something good?

„Ah, really? I think your wardrobe is more expensive than mine“ she looked up and down her brother and shook her head, not understanding why a suit can cost so much.

Okay, the same can said about handbags.

„Anyway, can you have an eye on Hope?“ she asked, because she had to take care of a few things and now Elijah was there, he can make sure their niece is safe and sound. Not going to imagine what would happen if Hope gets hurt or something else.

„I’d love to“ he smiled at his sister and watched her heading upstairs, before he took a few steps towards his niece.

„What would you like to do, Hope? Shall I search for your pencils?“

He never thought he find himself on the floor some day, ruining his suit with felt pens. Or rather, let Hope ruin it. Nevertheless it happened already more than once and he didn’t mind it. He'd gladly sacrifice a few dress slacks or shirts. Hope is a gift for this family and he will be forever thankful for the effect she had on him, on Niklaus and on the family.

However, Hope seemed to have something else in mind.

„Can you play something?“ she asked and smiled at him.

„Of course, darling niece.“

He helped her get down of her chair before he sat down on the piano which was standing in the entrance hall – the one which had to be replaced every now and then because it got damaged. His fingertips caressed the smooth surface of the piano keys and he couldn't help but smile because just a few moments ago, all he wanted was to fill the house with music and now he actually had the possibility to do that without anyone doubting his intention behind it.

He began playing shortly after, choosing to play Shastakovitch Waltz No. 2 but in a light, more alive version - a happy one. His finger flew over the keyes, letting the melody flow through the room. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to get carried away for a bit. Only for a few seconds of course, because he couldn't allow himself getting too distracted. Instead, he watched Hope; because he didn't had to watch the keys or sheets of music. He had the notes memorized. When he finished, he was having a huge smile on his lips.

A smile Hope noticed.

„Are you happy?“ she asked softly, because it's actually rare to see her uncle looking like he’s happy and loosended.

„Yes, I am“

▬▬

`·.¸¸.·´´¯`··._.· Three Weeks later `·.¸¸.·´´¯`··._.·

There is only a slight breeze, playing with her curls as she was standing on top of a terrace, her hands gripping the railing tightly. She wondered if it has been a good idea. Right now, she doubted it. Yes, she had been excited to see him again. But back then, there was literally an ocean between them and she hadn't been sure if he has even gotten her message. She still didn't know if he had gotten her message and if he even wanted to see her, but she was on the rendezvous point. Waiting. Trying to enjoy the sight over New York City. Although that's almost impossible because she is so nervous. Like mentioned before, there's a difference between having an ocean between them or meeting him in person in less than ten minutes.

Four years have passed, four years since she has last seen him and has basically told him to leave her alone. Four years can be long, even for a vampire - it's possible that he had moved on. It's possible that he has devoted himself completely to his family by now - without even having the possibility nor time for meeting her. She didn't know what she should expect, if she should be glad if he won't show up. It would probably save her future problems. Nevertheless she hoped he would want to see her. She had to ease her mind or she will continue to get bothered by illusions of him. She wanted to be free and missing him is not a sign of freedom.

Her grip around the railing steadied even more as she closed her eyes and tried to take a deep breath. Since when is Katherine Pierce nervous when she is going to meet a man? The only difference is that he isn't just any man, he is Elijah. Elijah whose fault it was in the first place that she decided to leave the continent and come back four years later - which actually didn't make it any better. The only thought which actually was able to calm her was that she is the one who is in control.

They'll be meeting on her terms and she wasn't dependent on him. Interestingly, it is the other way round this time. She only needed to talk to him and then decide if she can turn the odd feeling of missing him into something else. Elijah, however, is hoping for her forgiveness. No matter how much time has passed and if he still cared about her or not, if he wanted someone's forgiveness he'll try to do his best to get it. She knew he liked to burden himself with things and won't stop until he'll think he redeemed himself. After all, that's the only reason why he continues to stay at Klaus' side.

Five minutes. Time seemed to flow. Her heartbeat increased. She didn't like the feeling deep down which was trying to fight it's way to the surface. She was nervous and excited, there was no way in denying that. However, there is also a part in her which hopes for and seeks his presence. A part of her which wanted to be close to him, wanted to smell him, touch him. A part of her which wanted to claim him as hers. Because deep down, she still loves him. No matter how much she's trying to fight that feeling or telling herself he didn't deserve any of her feelings.

▬▬

Elijah has had enough time to organize things - one of the many things he had always admired was Katerina's farsightedness. It would have been difficult if she had asked him to meet her in a day, but she gave him three weeks, enough time to plan his little trip to New York City under the cover of having to attend a business meeting with one of his companys. He had tried his best to cover up his brightened mood in the past three weeks, in which he was successful in doing so. Only his niece seemed to see past the fascade he was putting up, but quite fortunately she didn't sell him out.

He had left New Orleans one day before the meeting and drove straight to NYC. He could have chosen a flight, but he decided it was the best if he could concentrate on something else, if he hasn’t too much time to think. He still didn't know why she wished to meet him, she was barely a person who reached out to someone. Naturally, he hoped the best. He also hoped he hasn't misinterpreted the message - he had been haunted by her for the past years which had lead into seeing things which aren't really there. Or rather, it lead into seeing Katerina even though there was no chance she'll be wandering through the streets of New Orleans. He was afraid that his mind had played a terrible trick with him, but the message was still there the day after having received it and the day after and so on.

Despite having had the pleasure of having a restful sleep in the last three weeks, he couldn't sleep at all the night before meeting her. His mind wandered off a thousand times, thinking of all the possible scenarios. He had made terrible mistakes in the past, especially if it came to Katerina. Perhaps this is going to be the last chance to make things right. He mentally prepared speeches and apologies until he finally had fallen asleep.

The next day has been stressful, mentally exhausting. She wanted to meet him at 8pm and he had to kill time until the evening. Unfortunately, killing time seemed to be impossible. He couldn't concentrate on a book, he couldn't talk to his siblings, he didn't dare to get lost into another activity, fearing he might forget time. Usually he had a lot of work to do, it's rare for him to actually have the luxory to have free-time. And yet he wished he could drown himself in work, because it would stop him from counting down the hours until he'll see her again.

A part of him was scared she might have reconsidered her choice in wanting to meet with him. A part of him already regretted his decision of not replying to her message. Not that he hadn't wanted to. However, that's the way how they had dealt with it in past. silent assent. He didn't know how often he had smoothened his suit or played with his cuff links the hour before he finally decided to leave his hotel room in order to get to the location. It's a blessing that he always invested in quality, otherwise he would have probably torn out his cuff links by now.

Usually, he likes to arrive a tad tardy, making sure the attention is on him. What did Rebekah called it? A dramatic entrance? Nevertheless he wanted to make sure he won't let Katerina wait. Furthermore, he didn't want to have to wait any longer either. He wanted, no, he needed to see her. When he arrived at the building on whose roof terrace she is going to wait for him, he'll took a moment for himself. It didn't happen often that he feels something like excitement, yet that is exactly what he felt in that moment. He - a man of one thousand years - felt excited because he is going to meet with a girl. And moreover, he wasn't only filled with excitement, but also with a tad of fear, because he did not know what will expect him.

He let his hand glide across his tie, smoothing it before he easily entered the building and then the elevator which will bring him to the penthouse. While the elevator set itself in motion, Elijah looked at the mirrored walls and watched himself. He looked calm and he was very glad that he had mastered the art of suppressing his emotions to the surrounding. Otherwise the entire world could see how nervous he actually was.

The elevator moved too slow and yet too fast at the same time. Nevertheless he didn’t hesitate to leave the elevator once it has reached it’s destination. Again, he quickly and easily entered the access to the penthouse, albeit it wasn’t that difficult as the door was not locked. There was a part of him wondering why that is - that part, however, was not big enough to distract him from what is going to come. He only assumed that Katerina had already arrived, given the fact he literally had free access. He quickly crossed the luxurious apartment, his eyes set on the open french doors. Light white curtains danced in the slight breeze and the starting setting sun set everything in a golden color. He hesitated for a moment and took in a deep breath.

That’s the border that separates him from meeting her, seeing her again. Although he wasn’t able to see her yet because of the large size of the terrace, he could feel her presence. She’s here, waiting. For him. He glanced at his watch, he’s right on time. Another deep breath, smoothing his tie again and then he crossed the doorstep and entered the roof terrace.

Colorful wildflowers bent a little with the wind, the roses which covered the steel pavillion in the middle of the terrace bloomed. Everything was quiet with the expection of the soft sound of a wind chime. He followed one of the pathes between the flower beds, being instinctively drawn to a certain spot in the corner of the terrace where one has a beautiful overview over the city. Not long until he finally saw her. Katerina. He blinked, making sure his eyes really saw the truth, making sure she is not something his mind had made up to fool him. No, this was reality.

The breeze played with her long dark curls and even though he only saw her backside, she was exactly as he remembered her. Her style hadn't changed, wearing high heels and without a doubt expensive, form fitting clothes. Elijah was certain she knew he had arrived, yet she didn't turn around so he decided to stop a few feet behind her, his gaze laying on her exquisite frame in a gentleman like manner. He couldn't help but smile, his eyes lighted up, even though he tried to appear calm, collected even. He yearned to address her, letting his tongue curl around her beautiful name. Katerina.

He hesitated, however, remembering her anger the last time he had called her Katerina. She forbade him to do so and even though he refuses to call her Katherine, he will not provoke her. Nevertheless he didn't like the thought of addressing her by the anglo version she had chosen as a name. He simply refuses to do so.

Now he had to be careful, almost sensitive with his following words. He had to wait and see in what mood she was, had to figure out the reason for their meeting. He remembered her message, her words. ‘It took some time but I’m ready now.' She had never said anything about being ready to forgive him, even though he hoped that this was the reason why she wanted to see him. On the other hand it was within the realm of possibility that she is just ready to throw him over the railing. He'd deserve it, but he prefers the first option.

"It's an interesting place you have chosen for a meeting."

▬▬

Hyper sensitive hearing had noticed him before he even had set a foot into the apartment. She had heard the elevator moving, had heard the soft 'bing' when the elevator had stopped and opened its doors. Katherine hadn't moved, half expecting him to vamp speed towards her, being almost certain he'd know exactly where she could be to found. Nevertheless he didn’t do it, even though that'd be typcially Elijah. He took a liking into appearing unexpected and out of nowhere. But this time he took his time. Her entire senses were fixed on him, she could hear every one of his slow steps. The closer he got, the more her heart seemed to be jumping out of her chest. He was really there, he really came! Damn it, she thought she was more prepared.

She heard him halting, now almost feeling his presence even though she was certain he was still out of reach. Katherine took a deep breath upon hearing his words, clearly noticing that he remembers everything which had happened here. He could not have forgotten about the history of this place, what it had meant for them, otherwise he wouldn't be here. After all, she hadn't texted him an address or the name of this place. No, it had been up to him to remember what she had meant, to remember their past. And he did - she took that as a good sign. It actually made her smile a bit - what a good thing he couldn't see it.

However, it didn't help with her nervousness. She took another deep breath, closing her eyes shut for a second before she slowly turned around and finally faced him. Of course he was wearing a suit, she would expect nothing less - she'd probably be alarmed if he wore something else. The darkblue color suited him, but it's no secret he had an impeccable taste.

"Elijah" she greeted him calmly, trying to not show any emotion.

She had noticed he hadn't addressed her yet, something which didn't happen often. She knew he liked her name - Katerina not Katherine - and he preferred to address someone with their name. This time, however, he chose not do but she knew it had a reason. Elijah never did anything without having a reason. She took a step forward, away from the railing in order to give herself more room. Even though she still made sure there was enough space between them.

"It really is an interesting place with a lot of history, don't you agree?"

She asked him with the slight tilt of her head, watching him attentively while she waited for a reaction.

▬▬

He will probably never be not amazed by her uncompareable beauty and for a moment, he was truly immobilized. It seemed like time stood still the moment she decided to turn around. He felt himself reminded of the first time he had the pleasure to lay his gaze on her beautiful face in 1492. Nothing has changed, her enchanting beauty is still the same, causing him to stop breathing for a moment. The corner of his mouth lifted up into a smile, even though he didn’t intend to. Once more he realized the effect she had on him, once more he realized how lucky he had been to be with her and how foolishly he had thrown it away.

There was nothing hateful in her features, nothing scared or fearful when she finally turned around. His gaze immediately landed on her face, looking into her deep brown eyes. If there had been any form of negative feelings towards him, her eyes would have shown them. Katerina is in some aspects like him, she’s careful with her feelings. But unlike him she didn’t hesitate to show feelings if she saw so fit. She might fool others with words or even actions, but her eyes mostly held the truth. Some things can not be faked and the warmth in her eyes is one of those things.

It relieved him to some part, knowing that she didn't seem to intend to throw him down the building, that his nightmares didn't seem to come true. He remembered those dreams all to well, her ice cold stare, her words - everything this dream vision of her had said was true, nevertheless it hadn't been pleasant.

"How could I ever forget about the days we have spent here?" he questioned softly, now not caring about the tiny smile on his lips.

"It was just a surprise you picked out this place out of all possibilities."

Yes, he still hoped there was a meaning behind her choice. He paused for a moment, his gaze never breaking the eye contact, taking in everything of her.

"You look gorgeous." he didn't try to compliment her, even though she'd deserve all the compliments in the world.

His words were a mere statement because she absolutely did look fabulous, healthy. Her skin seemed to glow even more and that's not because of the setting sun. Her hair looked so soft he wanted to touch it, play with one of her thick curls. He was tempted to just reach out for her, pull her close and wrap his arms around her - even if it was for just one last time. Words can not explain how dearly he had missed her, how he had yearned to be reunited with her. Of course he didn't do it, it would earn him a -deserved- slap and moreover he would never disrespect a woman.

▬▬

She ignored his compliment, being well aware that he meant what he had said. He isn't one to compliment women just like that. But just because she was ignoring it, didn't mean she won't appreciate it. It actually helped her to relax a little bit and her nervousness faded away. Katherine Pierce is back!

"I have to admit I wasn't certain you would remember it. It's indisputable a beautiful place, so peaceful and unexpected in a city like New York. But people tend to forget things which are connected to something they consider as foolish, if they believe the person with whom those memories are connected to has deceived them."

A swipe? Perhaps. She paused because she knew too well that he felt like a fool for loving her, that he thought she had played him. He hadn't believed her, no matter if he had been afraid of the feelings he had for her or not.

Her words probably made it clear she is still hurt, but there is a different meaning behind them as well. She wanted to forgive him, but she didn't want to show weakness. She doesn't know what had happened in the last four years since the last time she had seen him, if he had forgotten about her and just came here out of conscientiousness, if he had found someone new. She wanted to make sure he deserved her forgiveness. His reaction to her statement would tell her.

Elijah tore his gaze away and focused his vision on a few tiny red flowers which are gently swaying in the breezes. His siblings often called him foolish, sometimes even pathetic for having hope, for never giving up, for unconditionally caring about the people he holds dear.

And yet that was exactly what he had not done with her. He gave her up, pushed her away, even made her fear him again. He had hurt her. He only saw the worst in her, the woman who would do anything to get what she wants, who manipulates, uses and deceives. There had been a timespan where he had fallen for the lies, the ones which had been told him and the ones he had told himself. Like a coward he had not faced the feelings he had for her after he finally had realized that she indeed loved him. He had chosen the easiest way for him, believing it would be better for Katerina but in reality he just had been afraid, had not considered what his actions would do to her. How can he call himself a man if that's how he deals with problems and difficulties?

He was in fact a foolish man for so many reasons, especially when it came to her. His wrongdoings exceed the fair value of all the good things which he could offer and he once again asked himself, why she had chosen him in the first place. He had failed her multiple times, treated her like an enemy. He was part of the reason why Katerina had been destroyed, why she lived in current fear of a gruesome death. He had broken his promises of wanting to have a future with her, his promise to protect her, never let his family harm her ever again. He failed her in everything.

So yes, calling him foolish, even pathetic is justified. He deserved it and once again he wondered why she wanted to see him when he saw his actions as unforgiveable. Of course he still had hope even though he saw no reason why Katerina should forgive him. A hopeful fool is what Niklaus often called him. And perhaps his brother has been right this time.

"I could never forget it, neither the good nor the bad things." he admitted, making it clear he will never forget anything which had something to do with her.

On the contrary, he clung to those memories. His finger caressed the red blossoms and a deep sigh escaped his lips.

"I fear calling me foolish is only justified and well deserved." he raised his vision, his gaze landing on her face. "I am deeply sorry for everything which has happened. It was not your fault but mine."

His mouth opened again but closed a few moments later when no sound left. He wanted to tell her what a stupid fool he had been, wanted to tell her how much he had missed her, how sorry he was. But he couldn’t. It felt like he had lost the ability to speak.

He shook his head, now letting his vision roam over the roof terrace and the beautiful garden. He wanted to, needed to apologize, but he couldn't do it properly if he didn't know how to address her. His gaze returned to Katerina once again.

"May I ask for permission to address you by your given name?"

He asked formally, making it clear he respected her wish to not call her Katerina again. He hadn't had forgotten any of her words, no matter how much time has passed.

His words calmed her down, let her worries fade. Apparently he hadn't forgotten about her. There's no need to mistrust his words, Elijah is not a liar when it came to something like this. Nevertheless she expected more, anything. But nothing left his mouth and that seemed to surprise him as well. When he asked for her permission to call her Katerina, Katherine raised an eyebrow, always amazed by his choice of words. Civility suits him, she would expect nothing less, even though it came as a surprise he actually remembered her forbiddance to call her Katerina again. A proof he really meant what he said.

Given him the permission to call her Katerina again wasn't difficult, she had already made up her mind. Truth is, she missed him calling her by her birth name. She liked the way he says it, liked the way he put so much warmth and love in it. Nevertheless she took her time, not allowing him immediately to call her Katerina. Yes, she had already decided that she wants him to call her Katerina again, but he didn't have to know this. She didn't want to look desperate or look like she has waited for him to say it again. He had to earn that privilege and he did so by accepting her wishes of letting her go and not calling her that name again.

"I am not used to be given a choice. Usually you call me the way you want it." she stated, watching him attentively.

His gaze laid on her, waiting for her to answer his question. She could tell he was interested in getting a honest permission.

"I allow you to call me by my birth name, in private." it was barely there, but she noticed the tiny, relieved smile on Elijah's lips.

Elijah took it as a good sign Katerina gave her permission. It didn't only relieved him, it also allowed him to apologize properly. An apology can’t be taken as serious if it's not addressed directly to the receiver.

"Katerina"

His tongue curled around her name and he enjoyed the feeling of her name on his tongue. His eyes are on her, looking into her chocolate brown hues.

"Katerina, I fear apologizes won't make up for the pain I have caused."

He had at least ten speeches prepared but now that he needed them, not one of them seems to be fitting. He thinks of himself to be good with words, yet nothing can express his sorrow, his deep regret. Moreover, his thoughts seemed to be swept away. Everything he had prepared was gone, was lost the longer he looked into her eyes.

Suddenly he had the feeling it is probably the best thing which could have happen to him. He would be free to express his true feelings, let his intuition and instincts speak.

"Nontheless I do want to apologize.” at first, he started hesitantly

“I apologize for abandoning you when you needed me, I apologize for betraying you and breaking my word I gave you. I apologize for putting you through so much pain. I apologize for my childish behavior, for not taking the time to hear your side. I apologize for my foolish assumptions, I apologize for not being honest with you. I apologize for my weakness and my blindness, for my ignorance."

He apologized loudly and clearly, making it clear he meant every syllable, every letter. Every words came from the depth of his heart and presented the truth. But he wasn't done yet, his misdeeds are far worse, more wide-ranging.

"I am terrible sorry for the role I had in your story. The regret I hold for the dark doings which were commited against you by my brother will never go away. I apologize for not being able to stop him, I apologize for all the years you had to live in terror. I apologize for my inactivity, for not finding a better way to protect you, to save you. I apologize for my blind loyalty and obedience. I apologize for my silence, I should have never allowed it."

He had never apologized for these things before, at least not that directly. Of course he had been sorry for all the things which have happened to her, for all the things he and Niklaus had done to her. However, they had both kept quiet about this the last time they were together, an extensively apology never seemed to fit. The relationship between them had developed slowly, it had started as a buisness-case and a win-win-situation for both and had developed into genuine feelings.

But it was long overdue. He owed her an apology - more than one apology. And for once, the calm, stoic Elijah was gone, has vanished, that version was replaced by a compassionate one. Emotions are gathering in him, letting his hands shake in the progress. All the guilt, all his wrongdoings, all the love he holds for her is overpowering him. Tears gather in his eyes and he had to clear his throat before he was able to continue.

A thousand years of never putting himself first, of dedicating every second to his family; a thousand years of hardly letting emotions in, of hardly letting anyone in. Fivehundred years of wondering what it would be like to be given the chance of finding happiness with Katerina, fivehundred years of having the knowledge there had been someone who made him feel, care enough. A short time of actual happiness and love. And then he lightly threw everything away because of his mistaken assumptions, because of his own fear. For four years and three months he had to live with his guilt, with this terrible mistake and the realization that she had indeed truly loved him. Four years and three months with having to endure the longing, the pain which came close to torture because of the increased senses of a vampire, which only made it worse because he was more than just an ordinary vampire. It finally takes its toll.

"I do not deserve your forgiveness, I am beyond far from deserving any part of you." his voice wasn't as loud and clear as it had been before, in fact his voice is shaky.

"My decisions are not always comprehensible and sometimes I choose the wrong path. I have chosen the wrong path with you. I should have never let you go. I- I love you, Katerina." he didn't break the eye contact, instead he got lost in her deep-brown eyes.

The last time he had admitted his love for her, the last time he said those three words to her was when they had been here, in this penthouse before their ways had separated and Katerina went to search for the cure.

"You made me feel, believe in love again. With you I felt so... alive, I could be myself. You made me so vulnerable, you opened my heart and got inside me...you messed me up. But I wouldn't want to give up that feeling you gave me for anything in the world, I- I don't want to lose you again."

A small tear found its way down his cheek, but he couldn't care less. What kind of man can really call himself a man if he is afraid of showing emotions? He is very well aware of the fact he gave her all the power over him right now, a power with the possibility to hurt him like nothing else by admitting his feelings to her. He swallowed, his gaze still focused on her face, on the warm expression.

"Katerina, I am not worth your forgiveness or love, nontheless I am a selfish man and I hope I will gain it back eventually if you see so fit."

And with those words, he slowly reached out his hand for her, hoping she will take it, give him another chance to make things right.

▬▬

Katherine is shocked by his words, her mouth opened and closed, searching for words. Her heart skipped a beat, even more than just one. Yes, she had a reason when she asked him to meet her, but she hadn't expected this. Elijah admitting a mistake is rare, but Elijah apologizing, showing what he feels deep inside under his calm and controlled exterior is almost impossible.

And it touched her. Touched her deep in her soul. Elijah’s love is a pure one, a genuine one. For a vampire, every emotion is heightened, for an Original it must be almost overwhelming. And yet he decided to confess his love, confess his feelings as well as confess his sins. She knows about the impact, can understand what he must feel like.

"Elijah..." she whispered, tilting her head while never letting him out of her sight.

She had never seen him this vulnerable and he had never been that open before. Her heart ached as she recalled every one of his words.

No one has ever apologized to her before. No one had cared before. Everyone seems to believe she deserved everything which had happened to her, everyone seemed to believe she doesn't care about anyone but herself, that she's not capable of feelings, of love. But Elijah did. He believed she deserved an apology.

They didn’t start this century on the best terms, she wouldn’t forget the fact he had compelled her to stay in a tomb and threatened her to hand her over to Klaus. Today she knows he didn’t intended to hand her over to Klaus, he did it because he wanted to punish her for running. Not because she wanted to escape Klaus, no, Elijah did it because he was hurt. He was hurt she hadn’t had faith in him and his efforts to find a way to save her.

But despite their differences he agreed to help her. He chose to listen to her when she asked for his help. She can remember too well how scared she was to make that step. But if one wanted to make a deal with the Mikaelsons, it is the safest option to make a deal with Elijah. They had worked together and eventually developed feelings, which came surprisingly. After all the years she had feared him and Klaus, she had forgotten that she had once thought of Elijah as a very charming, obliging and attentive man. She had liked to be around him and yes, she had developed a soft spot for him back then. What she hadn’t known was the fact Elijah had fallen in love with her as well - it came unexpected because he had made it clear that he didn’t believe in love, so she had interpreted his attention as an act of kindness. He had said it himself that he took pity on her looking lonely in the castle.

She stepped closer, resisting the urge to caress his cheek. The absolute broken look on his face, his obvious pain triggered something in her, it saddened her. There had been a time where she would have gloated about it out of hurt feelings, but all it caused now was pain.

Katherine didn’t know what to say, he had already said more than she had expected, more than she had ever dreamed off. He had admitted his feelings, had declared his love for her.

And it meant something. Actually, it meant a lot to her. He gave her a second chance when no one else had. He didn’t saw her as the selfish, manipulative and ice-cold bitch everyone else sees in her, he saw her as a person, someone worth loving. Elijah believed in her, cared for her and revived something she thought of having lost a long time ago: being able to put faith and trust into a person. She has never, not at any point, faked her feelings for him.

That they even came this far is almost impossible. For her, it’s not easy to forgive the things he has done and there was a time when she had been so angry at his recent actions that she wanted to see the world burn. But there is a reason why she chose to message him, why she wanted to see him. The reason why she messaged him is because she has made up her mind. It took a lot of time, but she found herself being able to forgive him.

She would say she has had a diversified and fun life in the past four years but eventually it didn’t fill the hole anymore. When Elijah left, he left a hole in her heart. She had done everything to ignore it, because she didn’t want him in her life anymore. She burnt everything she had of him, left the country and the continent, started a new life, tried new things and enjoyed herself. But eventually all those things couldn’t conceal the fact that she still loves him. She loved him and she hates it because it’s so pathetic. She would love to admit this to him, would love to confess her feelings but at the same time she just couldn’t do it. Not yet. Not after everything which has happened. She needed time, had to see what the future holds for them. If he finally chooses her or -at least- find a good solution for the situation.

Perhaps it’s stupid, but prevention is better than cure. Nevertheless she’ll hold his words in her heart, in her memory. It’s incredibly to know he still choose her, that he hadn’t replaced her like some others would have done. It touched her heart and it touched her soul.

Finally, she raised her hand and took his, his touch sending warm chills all over her body because it felt so good. Even more so, she longed for his touch, wanted to be in his arms. However, now was not the right time, she needed more security to truly enjoy it.

"You might not deserve my forgiveness now, but this time it is me who gives you another chance, the opportunity to re-earn my trust."

Her voice is soft, a whisper. She didn’t had to say he was forgiven, he’ll know. And he’ll also know her forgiveness doesn’t mean she’ll forget. No, she will never forget what happened. But her forgiveness meant something else: A chance to start new. A chance to prove himself. A chance for happiness.

Elijah smiled at her words, the words which managed to ease his mind, his heart. A second chance, that’s all he had hoped for.

His thumb softly and carefully caressed the back of her hand, making sure she wants his touch.

“I promise you, Katerina, I’ll prove my worth. As long as you want to have me, I will never leave you again.” he is serious with his words.

He will never leave her again. She is the woman who makes him happy, the woman he loves. And perhaps - for the first time - he needs to be a selfish man in order to protect the things which are important to him, and only to him. He knew that loving someone gives them the power to destroy you and trusting them not do. He also knew that Katerina already held that much power over him. It is worth the risk.

The smile on Katerina’s lips filled him with happiness and he slowly lifted their hands up to his lips in order to press a soft kiss on the back of her hand just at the moment when the sun kissed the horizon goodbye and delicate fairy lights which covered the pavilion and the entire railing, as well as the ones which covered a part of the giant roof terrace, began to glow.

His eyes never left hers, entirely fascinated by the different shades of brown, as he spoke the following words.

“I love you, Katerina. Always and Forever.”

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A/N: This was chapter 9! I hope you’ve enjoyed it. I hope you liked the Reunion. The next Chapter will be about Elijah trying to prove himself. It will also have more information about the setting aka the penthouse with the giant roof terrace (did anyone recognize it?). I think the next Chapter will be a cute one. What would you like him to do? I already have a few things in my mind but I’m still curious about your thoughts.

I’m also curious about something else: Do you listen to the piano pieces Elijah plays on Youtube etc. or does it not matter to you if it is a certain piece?

If you like it, hit the ♥ - or come into my askbox, I’d love to hear your opinion. Your messages are also the thing which keeps me going.

#Kalijah #katherine x elijah #tvd fanfiction #Katherine Pierce #Elijah Mikaelson #TVD #The Vampire Diaries #Fanfiction #ff #tvd fic #fanfic #katherine #elijah #the things we do #Part 9

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achieveyourtarget-blog · 4 years

Text

How to Make It As a Fitness Model!

People that follow my stuff know I generally write about nutrition, supplements, training, and other topics that are more science based than subjective topics, such as what is covered in this article. I decided to shuck my science geek persona, and write on a topic I know will be helpful to thousands of would be and want to be fitness models.

As well a known "hard core" science based no BS writer, why I am writing what some will perceive as a "fluff" article? Over the years I have gotten hundreds, perhaps thousands, of gals that ask me via email, letters, or in person "how do I become a fitness model Will? You have been in the business a long time, surly you of all people should know." I get this from newbies and I get this from women that have been at it a while but have been unable to "break in" effectively.

The fact is, I have been in the fitness, health, and bodybuilding biz a long time, and though I am known as a science and nutrition based "guru" type, I have trained many a fitness athlete, and judged fitness and figure/bikini shows for the NPC, Fitness America, Fitness USA, and other federations as well as given marketing and business advice to all sorts of athletes, including fitness models. So, it's not as far fetched as it might seem that I am going to use this space to cover a non scientific topic, which is, how one goes about being a fitness model.

This article will be useful to both experienced and novice types looking to "break in" to the biz. If you are already a professional and successful fitness model, I am sure you may still glean some useful information from this article.

First the bad news, there is no one way to become a successful fitness model. There is no single path or magic secret. There are however some key things a person can do to greatly improve their chances of "making it" in the fitness biz as a model, and perhaps using that success as a launching pad to greater things, such as movies, TV, etc.

Several of the top fitness models (Trish Stratus and Vicki Pratt come to mind but there are many others) have gone onto careers in entertainment of all kinds. Bottom line, though there is no magic secret to being successful as a fitness model, this article will be about as close to a blueprint for success as you will find.

"Do I need to compete?"

This is a question I get asked all the time and it's not an easy one to answer. In fact, the answer is (drum roll) yes and no. The person has to deicide why they are competing in the first place to answer that question. For example, do you need to compete if your goal is to be a successful fitness model?

The answer is no. Many of today's well-known fitness models have never competed, or they competed in a few small shows and it was clearly not part of their success as fitness models. However, competing does have its potential uses.

One of them is exposure. At the upper level shows, there will often be editors, publishers, photographers, supplement company owners, and other business people. So, competing can improve your exposure. Also, competing can make sense if you are trying to build a business that is related to your competing or will benefit from you winning a show.

For example, say you have a private training gym you are trying to build. Sure, having the title of say Ms Fitness America, or winning the NPC Nationals and being an IFBB pro, will help your reputation and the notoriety of your business. There are many scenarios were it would help to have won a show for a business or other endeavors.

On the other hand, it must be realized that winning a show does not in any way guarantee success in the business end (and it really is a business) of being a fitness model. The phone wont ring off the hook with big offers for contracts. Also, it's very important to realize that it's common that the 4th or 6th or 8th place finisher in a fitness or figure show will get more press than the winner. Why? Though the winner might have what it took to win that show, it's often other gals the editor, publishers, supplement companies etc, feel is more marketable.

I have seen it many times where the winner was shocked to find she didn't get nearly the attention she expected and other girls who placed lower have gotten attention in the form of photos shoots, magazine coverage, etc. Something to keep in mind when you ask yourself the important question "do I need to compete and if so, why am I competing?" Answer that question, and you will know the answer to the heading of this section. Winning a title of some sort can be a stepping stone, but it is not in itself any guarantee of success in the fitness industry. It's like a college degree; it's what you do with it.

Now. If you compete for the fun of it, then by all means go for it, but the above is focusing on competing as it relates to the business aspect of being a fitness model.

Right body, wrong federation?

Ok, so after reading the above you have decided you are going to compete, or will compete again. If you don't plan to compete, you can skip this section. The biggest mistake I see here is so many gals have the right body for the wrong federation. Each federation has its own judging criteria and a competitor will do poorly simply because they didn't bother to research which show would be best suited for them.

I will give you a perfect real world example of this. Recently I judged a show whose criteria for the figure round was the women should be more on the curvy softer side with some tone, vs. being more muscular and athletic with less bodyfat that other federations might allow. At this show one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen came out. She was very proportional, great muscle tone, lean, and athletically shaped with narrow hips and waist and wider shoulders. How did she do at this show? She didn't even place in the top ten!

Why? Because she was not what we were instructed to look for and didn't fit the criteria. After the show I informed her that she looked great, but this may not the federation for her. I told her she had much more of an NPC type body, where a little more muscle, athletic build, and less bodyfat is rewarded.

The following week I was judging an NPC fitness, figure, and bodybuilding show and there she was. How did she do? She won the entire show with all judges voting her number one unanimously.

Conversely, if your body type tends to be more rounded and toned, but with a little more bodyfat, wider (but not fat!) hips, you may be better off competing in say the Fitness America Pageants. If you are going to compete:

(1) find out exactly what the judging criteria is for that federation and

(2) go see those shows as a spectator for several different federations and see which one your physique, style, etc will fit into best.

(3) You have to decide if you truly have the athletic abilities to compete in a fitness competition (which requires a routine) or a figure/bikini competition.

I often see women who would do well in a figure show but really don't have the athletic abilities do the routines required to be competitive with other athletes in the show. Some shows will allow you to do both competitions and some wont.

Networking 101: dos and don'ts...

In so many respects, this is the area that will make or break you in any business, and yet, people in the fitness industry do an amazingly poor job at it. If you don't network and market yourself properly, you can pretty much forget about having any real success as a fitness model, or a success in virtually any business. For the sake of space, we will stick to fitness.

When I first started out, I was a self marketing machine. I could be found at every show I thought might be an opportunity, walking the isles of trade shows, bodybuilding, shows, fitness show, and others. I gave out a zillion cards and I took a million home with me, and followed up on each and every one. I went to as many industry related meetings, outings, parties, etc. as I could get into. I now have the reputation and experience in the industry that I don't have to go to such a show unless I feel like it, or have meetings, but they were quite helpful in the beginning.

I am always amazed at the number of fitness models who contact me who have never even been to the Arnold Classic Fitness Weekend, or the Mr. Olympia, or the trade shows like the NNFA Expo West and others. If you want to make it in the fitness business you sure as hell had better treat it like a business.

I have seen many a pretty girl who wants to be a fitness model who thinks if they stand there looking pretty long enough, someone is going to offer to put their face on the cover of a magazine. News flash, there are millions of beautiful women out there and to be noticed, you have to hussle to get that business like everyone else by networking your butt off, or having a good agent (if you can afford such a thing) who is doing it for you.

Pick a few major industry shows to attend (some of which were mentioned above) and go to them every year. Have a plan of attack of exactly how you plan to market yourself and network. Many fitness models, bodybuilders, etc see a show as one big party. If that's you, then have fun at the party, but don't think you are really marketing yourself as a serous business person or athlete.

Another thing that always amazes me is the number of fitness models who either have no business cards, or have some cards they printed up on their bubble jet printer at home! They ask me to help them or what ever and I say "give me your card" and they look at me like "I am so pretty I should not need a card you fool." This attitude turns off editors, photographers, writers, and industry people faster then if they found out you were really a transvestite. Don't do it. For every pretty girl out there who thinks the world owes them a favor, there are 100 who are ready to act like professionals.

Ever wonder why some fitness model you know is doing better than you are even though you know you are prettier than her? That may be why...never ever go to a show to network without good cards, bios, and professionally done head and body shots you can give to said editors, publishers, photographers, industry types, etc. Don't stand around looking pretty assuming they will find you, find them first and introduce yourself. And of course it should go without saying you should be in good condition and have something of a tan to look your best.

You want to go to the shows and party? Fine, but do it in private after the work is done and don't make a fool out of yourself at some industry sponsored get together. Hell, I was virtually poured into a cab at last years Arnold Classic after going to a sushi place with some well know industry types and companies owners (you know who you are!) but at least no one saw me! We had our own little private get together after the show to let loose.

Let me give you one final real world example of how NOT to market yourself. Last year I was on retainer as a consultant to a mid sized supplement company. The owner of the company asked me if I knew a couple of fitness model types that could work his booth for a trade show. In fact, he requested "unknowns, some new faces people had not seen yet but had real potential to grow with the company." I went and found him two such gals I thought fit the bill.

He offered to pay their flights, room, and food plus a thousand dollars each for the days work. The two girls were told to be at the booth 9am sharp. The night before at the hotel, I saw the two girls getting in a cab at 11pm or so dressed to kill, clearly on their way out to party. The next day they showed up at the booth an hour and a half late and hung over! What was the result of this? (1) it embarrassed me to no end as I had recommended them to the company owner (2) they would never get work from that company again (3) they would never get any work from me again and (4) they would not get a reference from either of us for other jobs.

I see this type of thing all the time in the fitness biz, and it's not limited to fitness models. Amazingly, a few weeks after the show they emailed me and the company owner wanting to know when their next job would be! Amazing...

Who loves you baby?

If there is one universal truth, it's that the camera either loves you or it does not. Any professional photographers will tell you this. For some unknown reason, some people are very photogenic and some are not. Truth be known, there are some well known fitness models (who shall remain nameless as they would probably smack me the next time they saw me) who are not all that attractive in person. It's just that the camera loves them and they are very photogenic, but not terribly pretty in person.

Conversely, I have seen the reverse many times; a girl who is much better looking in person than in photographs. Such is the fate of the person who wants to be a model of any kind, including a fitness model. If you find you are not very photogenic, keep working with different photographers until you find one that really captures you well and pay that photographer handsomely!

Now, to be bluntly honest, there are also some want to be fitness models who are not "unphotogenic", they're just "fugly"! There are some people out there who have no business trying to be fitness models. It does not make them bad people, it just means they need to snap out of their delusions and find a profession they are better suited for, like radio personality....

"How do I get in the magazines?"

This section sort of incorporates everything I have covered above, and adds in a few additional strategies. For example, as I mentioned before, competing in fitness shows and or figure/bikini shows can increase your exposure, thus getting the attention of some magazine publisher or photographer. Networking correctly at the various trade shows may also have the same effect, and of course having a good portfolio done by a photographer that really captures your look, a good web site, etc., will all increase your potential for getting into the magazines, or getting ad work, and so on.

However, all of these strategies are still somewhat passive versus active in my opinion. It's still the fitness model waiting to be "discovered." As far as I am concerned, waiting is for bus stops and pregnancy tests. Success waits for no man...or woman as the case me be. So, after all the above advice is taken into consideration as having an added effect to getting you magazine coverage, what else can be done?

For one thing, you should read and be familiar with all the magazines you want to be in so you know who is who and what the style of the different magazines are. I can tell you right now, if say the Editor-in-Chief of a good sized fitness or bodybuilding publications and says "hi, I am the Bob Smith what's your name?" and the fitness model has no idea who Bob Smith is, Bob will not take kindly to that. Why should he? You should know who the major players are in the publications you want to be seen in. He is doing you the favor, not the other way around. You should know who the major players are and actively seek them out, don't wait for them to "discover" you.

If you look at the masthead inside any magazine, it will tell you who the publisher is, who the Editor-in-Chief is and so forth. The mailing address for that magazine, and often the web site and email, can also be found. What is to stop you from looking up those names and mailing them your pictures and resume directly? Nothing, that's what. If you see a photo spread you think is really well done, what is to stop you from finding out who the photographer is and contacting them directly and sending them your pics? Nothing, that's what.

My point being, you want a get a break in the business, make the break, don't sit there thinking it's looking for you, because it's not. Be proactive, not reactive! Luck is the residue of design. Be successful by design. As my older brother used to say to me as a kid when I told him I was too scared to ask out a pretty girl "what's the worst that can happen Will? All she can say is no." That's the worst that can happen to you also.

Beware of web idiots, schlubs, morons, perverts, scum bags, and sleazoids!

This part is sort of self-explanatory but worth mentioning. As with all industries that deal in entertainment based media (e.g., television, theater, modeling, etc.), the fitness industry attracts its far share of web idiots, schlubs, morons, perverts, scum bags, and sleazoids, to name just a few.

There is also the class of person known as the schmoe, but we will leave that for another place and time. Point is you want to meet the right people while not getting involved with that group of worthless types who will only drag you down, delay you, or just flat out screw you up and over.

For example, a guy comes up and says he wants to "shoot you" for the magazines, but what do you really know of this guy? He has a camera and some business cards, so that makes him a photographer right? Wrong! If someone want to shoot you and they are not a well-known name (and you should know who the well known photographers are because you researched that already!), find out who they are. Do they have references you can call? Girls you can contact he has shot before and were happy with the work? What magazines has he published in? Does he do it professionally or as a hobby? That type of thing.

Another thing I see is the big web scam. I'm amazed how many girls get scammed by these web idiots. Lesson here is you get what you pay for, so when some person wants to build you a web site for free, you are getting what you pay for. Yes, there is good money to be made on the 'net, and the net can be great for marketing yourself and making contacts, but most of it's a scam.

You are better off paying a good web designer and web master who has experience with other fitness model types and has references you can talk to. I can't tell you the number of girls who have been screwed over by some internet thing that went to hell, like the "fan" who volunteers to build a free web site and either runs off with any money made from the site or puts their picks on porn sites and any number of other things that made them regret like hell ever agreeing to the site in the first place.

Clearly, I can't go down the list of all the possible pitfalls of the web idiots, schlubs, morons, perverts, scum bags, and sleazoids out there to be found in the entertainment business, but you get the idea. Be careful!

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elareine · 5 years

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In the shallows

Chapter: 2/6 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings for this chapter: Some swearing, mentions of racism (no slurs), guns and addiction Relationships: Dick Grayson/Jason Todd Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Celebrity, NO CAPES, Identity Porn, Romantic Comedy, Drama & Romance, Texting, Online Dating AO3: /18803473

Chapter One

Why is LA traffic so terrible.

R_n_R: You get used to it.

It’s like there’s a thousand damned souls on the freeway each morning and we just haven’t noticed we died yet.

R_n_R: Jesus, did you skip your coffee or something?

…Maybe.

Big day today. Wish me luck!

Two weeks into the pre-filming stage, Jason and Dick finally got together to work on the music.

“So. This is when they first become a couple, right?”

Dick frowned. “I don’t know if that’s accurate. They don’t kiss until after that scene, and they don’t talk about it until much, much later.”

Jason honest to God was rolling his eyes at him. “You honestly think they need to kiss to be together? They’ve both made the decision to do this, right?”

Dick barely managed not to yell at him. “I don’t think it was that conscious for Vano, but continue.”

“Thank you.” The sarcasm was grinding. “So I got the bridge and all that, but we need to figure out the chorus part. It’ll be you alone at first and then together. Like this…”

Jason started playing.

Listening to him, Dick felt all his annoyance fade. Say whatever you wanted about Jason - the man knew how to write songs. Hearing him sing live was different from streaming him on Spotify, too. It felt a bit surreal to be in a room with this… this genius.

“For arrangements, I was thinking just the acoustic guitar at first, then later the piano and more strings. Drums for the finale.”

“Yeah, it’s good.” That was admittedly a bit of an understatement.

Jason didn’t look fazed by Dick’s apparent lack of enthusiasm. “Here are the lyrics. Let’s try it together, yeah?”

After a deep breath on Dick’s side, they did. It was fine until they came to the chorus Jason had talked about. It had sounded great when Jason had done it alone, but with Dick…

There were a lot of long notes and Christina-Aguilera-style ’ah-ah-ah’s. It was just a lot. Dick barely got through it.

Jason didn’t look impressed, either. “Okay, again. Just the second part. This time, remember to breathe and get loud. Put some power into it.”

Dick glared. Way to be encouraging, asshat. “Okay, bring it.”

Infuriatingly, Jason just grinned as he started playing again. At least Dick was annoyed enough to forget about worrying. It probably improved his performance.

Still, he felt kind of stupid, singing his heart out as if he was at carpool karaoke.

“Better. Again. Stop feeling self-conscious.”

“Oh, thank you, that helps.”

“You’re an actor, right?” Jason barked. “So act. This isn’t your song, it’s Vano’s.”

Right. Vano, who loved Mateo and wanted to share this moment with him. Who found a voice in this scene.

“I’m off the deep end, watch as I dive in // I’ll never meet the ground // Crash through the surface // Where they can’t hurt us // We’re far from the shallow now…”

Dick’s heart beat faster when they finally came to a finish. Yeah, okay. That had been much better.

Jason looked approving, too. Despite every bad thought Dick had about him, that did feel good. “Fucking great.”

Before Dick could, you know, bask in the compliment or anything, he added: “Though you were off-key. This is G major, not minor. Again.”

It was going to be a long day.

Do you sing, too? Or just play the guitar?

R_n_R: Hey, there’s no ‘just’ about it! Guitar is difficult!

R_n_R: I sing too, though, yeah. Why?

I don’t know how people do it.

R_n_R: Talent and work. The usual combination.

No, I don’t mean that.

Don’t you feel exposed?

R_n_R: Pretty sure there is an exhibitionist joke in here somewhere

R_n_R: No, but seriously, aren’t you an actor? What’s different about singing? Just that it’s less your thing?

That too. I’m vain, in case you didn’t notice. I’m not me on stage or in front of the camera though, am I?

R_n_R: Interesting. I never looked at acting that way.

R_n_R: With singing it’s… I mean, I’m a songwriter because I think there has to be truth in the music. Even if it’s just a fun song about sex.

R_n_R: People notice when you’re just putting it on. Might be enough for a hit or two with the right manager, but you’re not going to last.

R_n_R: Look at Adele. Are her songs revolutionary? No. Are they continually evolving masterpieces of songwriting? No. But it’s not just her voice. She’s got that magic. You believe every emotion she sings about. It’s never too much.

R_n_R: Not saying there isn’t a skill to it. Obviously there is.

That’s what I’m worried about. Lessons can only teach you so much.

R_n_R: This for a recording?

Yeah. Sorry, can’t tell more.

R_n_R: It’s all good, I know how it is.

R_n_R: Who cares if you get it right the first time then? You’re not playing live. Auto-tune and techs will fix what you can’t. If the songs are good (I’m assuming you didn’t write them) and you’re decent technically, just focus on being honest. Or honest in your role.

R_n_R: I have no idea how that part works, obviously.

Haha, thanks. That’s actually reassuring, tbh.

And no, I don’t write the songs. Wouldn’t even know where to start. How do you do it?

R_n_R: Depends. Sometimes it’s a motif (melody snippet) I can’t get out of my head, sometimes a feeling or a song lyric. Then I just sit down and try it out until I got a solid idea, and then write it down. And then it changes again when I’m playing it with other musicians. How do you approach a performance?

I usually get a script, right? So it’s not making it up in my head so much as trying to understand what the writers and the director envision and then turn that into a fully formed character with mannerisms and a distinct voice and all that. I used to fill out reference sheets with character building questions, but these days, it comes naturally.

But honestly, movies are broken down into small scenes that you repeat over and over and over again, so it’s more important to stay in that moment. You need to be able to fix it on a character timeline, sure, but ideally, you stay in the feeling and give the director something slightly different each time to work with.

Why, got a big acting job lined up?

R_n_R: Luckily, it’s not much of a requirement in music videos, but I’ll take any help I can get ;)

R_n_R: But seriously, enough shop talk. Wanna watch another episode?

Even as filming started in earnest, relations between Jason and Dick didn’t exactly improve. They didn’t argue all the time, but Dick was always relieved when someone else joined them for lunch. One Tuesday, it was one of the main sound technicians. Dick barely knew him, but Jason seemed to, as they immediately started a good-natured argument over West Coast vs East Coast venues.

Honestly, it was pretty funny. Despite himself, Dick laughed when Jason described New York clubs as “full of wannabe writers and singers”, but still better than “the wannabe-celebrities in LA”.

Kyle looked at him. “You’re both from New York, right?”

Jason snorted. “You say that as if it means we should know each other, Kyle. Are you still on about that East Coast Elite conspiracy shit? ‘Cause let me tell you, we ain’t it.”

Always escalating the situation, that man.

“I was born there, yeah,” Dick acknowledged to diffuse the situation, “but my parents were circus folk, so…”

Kyle looked taken aback. Dick was used to that, so he just added: “We never stayed anywhere long. I consider our circus my home town.”

“Huh. Well, I’m from a small town in South Carolina.

“I’ve seen your so-called ‘town’, Kyle.” Jason actually made the air quotes with his fingers. “It’s about as Guns, Jesus and Country Music as you can get.”

“And yet you played our local theater.”

“Dude, in the beginning I would’ve played a McDonald if they’d paid us in veggie burgers.”

Kyle slapped his back, laughing. “That’s my Jason.”

Jason flinched visibly. Then he tried to laugh it off immediately, but Kyle looked at him with concern. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, just took a tumble a couple of days ago. Just a pulled muscle.” He grinned. “Don’t go thinking your weak-ass slap did that, dude.”

Despite himself, Dick cringed. He’d been injured for most of the filming of ‘Step Up 6 - Heatin’ Up The South’ and it had been a pretty shitty experience. ‘A star is born’ wasn’t nearly as physical, but thinking of all the lifting Jason had had to do over and over again this morning, he offered: “Would you like some painkillers? Pretty sure I got some in my trailer.”

“No.” Jason’s answer was more brusque than the offer demanded. Even Jason himself seemed to realise that because he added: “Thank you. I took something earlier, don’t want to mix.”

Yeah, when exactly? They’d been stuck together for the entire day. Dick would’ve noticed. Still, he mentally shrugged it off. If Jason wanted to be in pain, he could be, for all Dick cared.

Tell me about yourself.

R_n_R: Uh.

Not, like, identifying information. What do you like, besides music and movies with plenty of explosions?

R_n_R: This isn’t going to be much of a surprise, but travelling. It’s one of the best things about being on tour.

Do you have time to really see a place?

R_n_R: I try to take it these days if scheduling allows.

R_n_R: My band’s, I mean. It loses us some money, but I think we all benefit if it’s not just one anonymous stadium after the other.

God, yes, I hate that about press tours. At least with filming on location, you get to see the area. What’s your favorite place to visit?

R_n_R: Yeah, with promotions I never know where I am, either. Favorite place…

R_n_R: Man, that’s difficult.

R_n_R: What’s yours?

Just so you know, I can tell you’re stalling. Tokyo blows me away every single time. I got to see a lot of Japan, actually, and it was so beautiful.

R_n_R: I went on this Japanese game show once, it was fun. Just doing physical games against a boyband that’s super famous there. Not much talking needed, which was good because I always feel terrible I don’t speak more than a few phrases of the language.

Well, you’re just traveling through, right? At least you tried.

C’mon, answer my question.

R_n_R: I kind of fell in love with Berlin.

R_n_R: Not the prettiest city by any means, but there’s just so much on offer and no one looks at you twice no matter what you do or look like.

Sounds like New York.

R_n_R: Kind of, yeah. They have a similar vibe, but obviously, Berlin is more European. Also amazing bookshops. I stumbled upon one that’s sci-fi and fantasy only.

Wouldn’t the books be in German?

R_n_R: Nah, there were plenty of English ones (and other languages). It’s a very international city. The seller told me many people like to read books in their original language, if possible, and most of them speak English in some capacity.

So you like reading then?

R_n_R: Yeah.

R_n_R: Confession: I spent most of the day just there. There was a market hall with food stands right next to it and two more bookshops, one specialising in mysteries, and yeah. I got stuck.

Sounds amazing.

Though I gotta admit, I prefer audiobooks these days. Just more convenient to listen to while I’m doing something else.

R_n_R: See, I can’t do that, I need to sink into it.

I’m just bad at sitting still.

R_n_R: Not judging! I think it’s cool there are so many ways to get to experience a story these days.

R_n_R: Listened to anything good lately?

Dick tried to be a giving actor, really. Until today, Jason had been a receptive partner. Today, though, he was going through the motions woodenly, not picking up on any cues, really. It negatively influenced Dick’s own acting, and Dick could feel himself tensing up, knew he was slipping from the character.

Two hours and countless takes into the scene and Dick snapped.

“What the fuck are you doing,” he asked even before Kate called ‘cut’.

Jason glared at him. “My job.”

“No, you’re fucking not!”

“Both of you, shut up.” Kate wasn’t happy. “We’ll take twenty. Get over whatever crawled up your asses and come back ready to work.”

Jason nodded and wordlessly stalked off. Dick forced a smile on to his face: “Sorry, Kate.”

She rolled her eyes and waved him off.

Whatever, this wasn’t his fault, Dick thought as he walked over to his trailer. Jason was just impossible today. Fuming, he took out his phone, ready to complain to Rock_n_Rumble, when he saw that there was a text waiting for him.

R_n_R: Not feeling so great today.

Immediately, Dick shoved Jason the back of his mind. That asshole wasn’t that important.

:( What’s happening?

R_n_R: Just ran into an asshole racist this morning.

?? Are you okay??? What happened??

R_n_R: Said he was a fan, but, you know, clearly didn’t get the memo that I’m not available for his white supremacy bullshit.

Dick knew that feeling all too well. His blue eyes made it easy for people to forget he was Romani. These days he tried to talk about it as often as he could in interviews and stuff, but… people saw what they wanted to see.

R_n_R: Nothing unusual - you know how it is right now - but he was carrying a gun and I wasn’t. Didn’t pull it, but.

That sounds terrifying R

R_n_R: Kinda was. I dunno, I’m just still feeling slightly off-kilter right now and I can’t concentrate at work.

That’s understandable. Can you take a break?

R_n_R: Am on one right now.

Me too. Won’t be long tho - anything I can do?

R_n_R: Tell me not to do what I used to.

Dick’s mind started racing with the possibilities, but all he typed was: Whatever it is, don’t. Those assholes aren’t worth it.

R_n_R: Thank you.

R_n_R: Okay, time to pull myself together. No use taking it out on the wrong people. I can go punch something later.

Look, there’s literally no way you’re being as much of an asshole as my co-worker today, so.

R_n_R: Pretty sure there’s every way, but I’ll do better now.

As if on cue, there was a knock on Dick’s door. “Mr Grayson? Filming will resume in five.”

“Thank you, I’ll be right there!”

Gotta go. Take care, ok? <3

R_n_R: You too. Punch your co-worker for me.

When he returned to set, Dick wasn’t in any mind to deal with Jason’s shit, but the other man seemed to have pulled himself together. He didn’t talk at all beyond the necessary between takes, which usually would have annoyed Dick to no end but honestly worked out better than what happened before.

Turned out they didn’t need many takes after that.

Maybe it had just been Jason being scared of being vulnerable? Dick knew some of these tough guy types were.

Still. He would have expected the guy to be enough of a professional to not let it bleed into their work and fuck it up for everyone else.

When he fell onto his couch that evening with a sigh of relief, Dick’s phone chimed with a new message.

R_n_R: Sorry to have put that on you.

R_n_R: I did mention I was an addict before, right?

In passing.

Dick was about to add more, to tell him it was okay, that they didn’t need to talk about it today, but R_n_R kept texting as if he hadn’t seen Dick’s ‘typing’ status.

R_n_R: I don’t know what it’s like for actors but honestly, once you’re on tour and even halfway famous, drugs are fucking everywhere. It’s not an excuse - I grew up with that shit, I know better. Got put on some opiates for an injury and never got off.

R_n_R: So I needed pills to push me up.

R_n_R: And alcohol for my nerves, which weren’t doing so great with all the other stuff I was taking. Weird, right?

Dick’s hands were shaking. Now more than ever, he wished he could at least hear R_n_R’s voice on the phone to soothe him; or better yet, be face to face with him. Hold him through what was clearly a painful thing to tell.

R, it’s fine. You don’t need to tell me.

R_n_R: No, you should know what it means. You know, if we ever meet. I’m always going to be an addict, just hopefully a clean one.

R_n_R: My mom died of an overdose. I’m not going to be her.

Promise?

R_n_R: I promise.

R_n_R: And you never need to worry about setting me off, okay? Like. Even if you decide I’m an asshole and not worth it tomorrow, my stuff isn’t on you.

Dick hadn’t even realised he had tears in his eyes until one dropped down on the screen. Still, he was smiling, too.

Thank you. For that promise and for telling me.

I don’t think you’re an asshole at all. Kind of the opposite tbh.

#in the shallows #elareine writes #jaydick #jason todd #dick grayson #fanfic

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tratordhaman · 2 years

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ackbang · 6 years

Text

The Basement

@valisi-clark, @minxiebutt, and i were all really excited for katsucon and wanted to do a writing exercise that helped to challenge us and really reveal not only our writing style but also our storytelling. we thought it would be interesting to see how we would all interpret the same prompt. we then included some of the other eruris to partake in this challenge as well.

we used an ask that has been sitting in my inbox for a month by @nemiir. i love this question, but was really stuck on how to answer it.

we decided on the following prompt and restrictions: a one room scene describing how erwin reacted to learning the information in the basement. canon needs to remain intact up until the “give up your dream” scene, but how erwin survives is up to the writer (and does not necessarily need to be mentioned).

below the cut, you will enjoy the writing from @ackbang, @valisi-clark, @ladymacbethsspot, @minxiebutt, @flecksofpoppy, and @the-memoirs-of-a. also, not seen here, but the very energetic support of @momtaku!

@ackbang

He doesn’t know when Eren’s dream became his.

Eyes scarred from flesh that evaporated faster than ice, he sees it. The dream. Air and freedom and wishing to fly. To fight. To survive. It’s his dream, isn’t it?

His dream.

Their dream.

He looks at Levi and he can't catch his eyes. They flee from him like he's a beast. A monster. A titan.

It's a dream.

Was it his?

Had it always been his?

Levi looks at him with a sadness and a disgust and he isn't sure if this is what he wanted at all. That somehow these answers that sat in their hands in a book that was nothing but a book was all but unsatisfying in his gut. He still feels hungry for the truth. He’s so hungry. So hot.

Was it a dream? Was he a dream? Was this a dream?

Where was Eren?

A man and his family and his country. It was a story he'd seen here in his land but it was different. Was it different? Was he different?

“We'll see.” He had said. At the time he trusted himself to know what to do in this moment, but these thoughts. They were foggy. And his desires. They were different.

He looks at Levi and Levi doesn't look at him. He broke the door under his foot and he nearly tore the desk apart and he refuses to look.

He's hungry for his look.

It will help. He will help him. Like he did just hours ago to give up on a dream to only find that it hadn't ended. That he needed to pick it back up and fight a country and men he’s never seen. Men. Not Titans.

The truth was a lot but it felt lofty. The truth was a lot but it meant nothing. He was hungry and hot and needed more. And he looks at Levi to see Levi had been looking at him the whole time and he knows...

He knows his dream will end when men can dream no more.

@valisi-clark

Levi watched Erwin step through the broken door. He waited. Erwin glanced around the room, key in hand. Hange pushed past Levi to step into the basement. She began inspecting the room while Erwin tried the key on a desk drawer.

Finally, Levi stepped into the room and leaned against the wall next to the door. Levi heard the key turn in the lock. Erwin opened the desk drawer. Hange slowly backed away from one of the bookcases and turned to Erwin.

Levi watched Erwin lay three books on top of the desk. Erwin opened the top volume. Levi watched his eyes pass across the page. Then, Erwin lifted a small portrait.

“This is it,” Erwin said. He lifted his head and looked at Hange. “Do you see anything in this room that you think will be helpful to you?” She shook her head.

“I’m going to take everybody home,” she said. Erwin nodded. He held out a small portrait.

“Take this to Eren,” he said. Hange took it, flipped the portrait over and read the text on the back. She nodded and left the room without looking at Levi.

Erwin flipped a page in the top volume, and Levi watched his eyes move.

“Do you have to read it here?” Levi asked. Erwin looked at him.

“There may be information about this room and its contents.” Levi looked at the dust on the shelves. He adjusted his footing. “It’s not necessary for you to stay.” Levi felt the heat creeping up his spine. “I want to read this to make sure we aren’t leaving evidence behind.”

“I want you to be grateful that you’re going home.”

Levi's eyes darted away from the dust and to Erwin's eyes. Erwin looked down at his book. “You got what you wanted.” Erwin nodded. He lifted his only hand and traced some words on the page with his thumb.

Levi rolled his eyes and stepped away from the wall. Erwin closed the book while Levi moved to the desk. Levi picked up the volumes and settled them under his right arm. Erwin stared at the desk.

“Let’s go,” Levi said.

“Levi,” Erwin said. “Are you sure you can’t see them?” Levi clenched his teeth. But when Erwin looked at him, he swallowed. He imagined all of the soldiers who they lost two hours ago. But he couldn’t see their faces anymore. He could only see bodies.

“I see them,” Levi said. “I know all their faces.” Erwin ran his hand over his eyes. “If these books have the truth that you need,” Erwin looked at him, “Then you can tell them that they’re finished.”

Erwin's facial expression was blank. But he stood from the desk chair and turned towards the door.

“If I had died on the field,” Erwin said, ”Would you have come here?” Levi considered dropping the booked and leaving.

“Yeah,” he said, leading the way to the door.

@ladymacbethsspot

A creak, strain bending the beams, bending the gaze of hungry eyes, trained on a single door. The final obstacle. The prize, the goal, and the end. The end.

With one last gasp of resistance timbers groan and give. Snapping, sharp, splinters flying under his boot. Yielding, finally under the pressure.

A crack, and a collective breath, held for years, exhaled. All at once they are in the basement. The truth within their grasp. And, after a flurry of confusion, the ache of each moment ticked away uselessly away in ignorance, it’s located.

Levi finds it, he always does. A drawer, hidden cleverly, not clever enough to escape sharp grey eyes.

Laid on the table are the meager objects. So many years, contained here. A picture. Three volumes. Never were such ordinary, such unassuming objects so coveted.

Hanji has laid them out, but holds back.

“Commander?” They look to Erwin. All eyes trained, even so close to the finish. Erwin nods to Eren, hold out a hand indicating the desk.

“Your key brought us here, Erwin. It’s only right that you show us what is inside. It is, after all, your inheritance.”

Eren nods, swallowing. Now is not the time for hesitation. Not the time to think, but the time to do. And Eren does--reading the inscription on the photo in a voice that falls like stones dropped on the placid surface of a lake at morning.

A ripple. Growing, spreading. As the volumes open. As words pour forth. Hanji’s eyes shine and widen--bright with the fevers of discovery. And Erwin waits. As the pages turn. Levi shifts, his attention trained on the room, reading it as thoroughly as Eren reads his father’s legacy. And Erwin waits. As a cover closes, the tale finishes. And Erwin’s wait is over.

It is done. He was right. A truth, long sought, always suspected--they are not alone. And more, so much more.

It was supposed to an end. Erwin blinks, for once at a loss for words. What can one say, after all, when the weight of hundreds of lives crash down, at once, on their shoulders. Men, women, who brought them there. Their legacy. Their blood. Their lives.

Their lives.

The silence stretches. It grows heavy, solidifies, a weight on them all. Felt by more than Erwin.

The silence is broken. Erwin turns from them. He walks to the door, and exits the room. The door swings behind him, caught before it slams shut, pale fingers wrapped around its edge.

Erwin stands, rooted. Halfway up the stairs. Unable to continue. Levi passes next to him, to stand in front. One stair above. Eye to eye.

There are no words. There is no need. They have communicated, for years already, through looks and the silent language of their bodies. And in this way they speak. Erwin’s mouth opens. And closes. His throat is dry, tight.

Their lives. So many. For...?

“Was it worth it, Levi?” Erwin asks, his voice the creak of a rusty hinge.

“I--don’t know.” Levi answers.

“I thought it would be the end.”

Levi’s eyes say his answer. The answer Erwin already knows.

It is the end. And it is not.

There is no end.

@flecksofpoppy

If there’s one thing Levi has ever been unsure about where Erwin's concerned, it might be the basement.

First off, Levi considers his hometown--or lack thereof--to be a basement of types. He understand secrets, hidden dangers in the dark; and he wonders if Erwin is truly looking for salvation, the truth, or simply peace now.

A dead man has a certain wounded spent look about him--speaks in a tongue that is slow and dolorous--and when Levi witnesses Erwin as a man on the proverbial gallows for the second time.

Their situation is hopeless--a final true dead end in a series of movements already made of dead ends--all the skipping stones and hard places Erwin has managed to tread for so many years has finally run out.

Levi has wondered about the basement and Erwin’s obsession with it, but more important is Erwin himself--Levi has always considered himself more selfish than Erwin.

Levi decides in this walled desperate world all men seemingly dead walking that he wants to go to the basement too--that anything so close to the Underground must be hell, but since Levi has been following Erwin into hell again and again even after seeing the sky, he decides to do it again.

He promises Erwin will choose when he dies.

At the end, in torrents of blood and nothing surprising, unexpectedly, Levi learns how Erwin dreams--unconscious and nearly bleeding out on a roof--that he would be a student to the end, hand raised and voice young asking the same questions on the verge of death he did as a child.

Levi pushes the syringe plunger.

They wait for hours, a situation so tense no one says anything as the few left regroup--stony silence from the cadets, a quietude death brings--until Erwin wakes up.

When they finally reach the door, Erwin leaning on Levi’s shoulder without comment or complaint, his hand shakes with the key.

Levi ignores the shakiness in his own heart--abandons faith, trust, loyalty--and focuses only on Erwin’s weight, the sound of his labored breathing--alive.

“Fuck locks,” he says, and kicks in the door unceremoniously.

Erwin laughs hollowly into the dark, leans on Levi, says, “Thank you, Levi.”

@minxiebutt

“How is it?”

Erwin makes another circle, the slow clicking of boot heels all too loud, too selfish, too unworthy. By the door, Levi waits, head down. Hanji escorts a grieving boy away. Too selfish, Erwin knows, though whose greed, he can’t assign anymore. They’re both too something and it shouldn’t matter with the truth there and this should be a great burden lifted but Eren’s pained wailing is an echoing albatross that bares the weight of Erwin's new right hand.

How is it?

It is everything but Erwin feels nothing--nothing but a raging roar under his skin, in his brain, a spine alive again with the electricity of youth.

It is everything and Erwin remembers a gravestone somewhere in Sina that has seen better days but mosses and hides weeds and assures him that he did not dream or scheme or create theories on his own, alone.

It is everything, though Erwin can find nothing passed the breath of relief, a sigh, half-contented and half-guilty, because he rode toward death but steadfast hands snatched him back and it is selfish.

It is everything, so Erwin stops on floorboards thrice paced and opens the memory-dusty drawer in his mind to cradle with careful fingers something that means more to him than his own life.

It is validation and everything and a traded weight. The truth did not relieve him of his sins--his debt is not a forgiven thing to move past. Hands, phantom and vengent, hover over his neck, all the more greedy for his blood.

“It is enough,” Erwin decides.

“That’s all?”

Erwin nods without looking back. The stare burns his nape but it pierces the hands ready to steal him from oblivion so he is grateful.

“There is the potential for freedom, more than we’ve ever known.”

“But?” and Levi sounds so closed off that he may as well remain silent, mute, deaf.

“There is a potential for danger,” Erwin tells him. “Until we can conclude threats further away from the walls, our guaranteed safety relies on maintaining the statues quo.”

Levi scoffs and Erwin turns on his heel, sharp. Ready to cut, to bite and burn, this feverish demonic desire.

“That’s not enough,” Levi spits. He’s deathly still, his body exhausted by adrenaline.

“Is it not?”

Levi meets Erwin's gaze. A decisive, “No.”

“I have been too selfish,” Erwin decides. “To release this information before we are certain that exploration beyond our island--”

“No,” Levi interrupts and the certainty is a tsunami of self-doubt that crashes but it crashes on ankles of a fifty-metre without drowning the beast.

“No,” Erwin parrots. He spins, unanchored and untethered and unsure.

“No,” Levi says. He looks away. “Don’t shy back now, Commander.”

@the-memoirs-of-a

“Medicine…….the books are all related to medicine” Hange says.

Levi holds up vials. “Medicine” There’s something in his voice Erwin can’t quite place. His heartbeat finally settles unlike the dust kicked up from their search. He’s amazed the place remained intact after the fall as his eyes scan the room. Finally…….but. Erwin catches Levi’s side glance. “Your intuition isn't wrong. It's here.”

Erwin tries to replay the past hours in his head. It’s a blur, the charge, the bombardment of rocks, his world spinning, followed by the darkness. Then heat, and the sky. He’s on a roof, not a field. But there was a cost, a childhood friend, and it gnaws at the back of his mind. They will understand…….in the time. The weight of that key wasn't Eren’s alone these past months. A key that surprisingly wasn't for a door. Levi must have noticed a twitch of a brow and kicked it in patience long gone.

Father he thinks to himself but doesn't get a chance to complete that thought. Mikasa finds the keyhole hidden in the desk. The click resonants in the stale musk room and a drawer resists at first. “Empty” Eren cries.

“Look again” Levi replies. A hidden panel. “Erwin” Levi calls and it dawns on him he hasn't even left the entryway.

Levi and Hange part as Erwin spies three leather bound books. Journals. “Mint oils” Hange says.

“And charcoal.” Confusion flashes across Eren’s face.

“Preservation” Hange replies. Erwin’s hand twitches but they were not left for him.

“What did my father want me to see?”

Eren and Mikasa share a glance before the cover is flipped. A finger brushes his and it’s enough to give him the strength to hold back and wait. The confusion is evident across all faces. “A painted portrait?”

“No” Hange confirms and Erwin cuts in.

“It’s too detailed.”

The inscription on the back reads: This is not a painting. This was created using reflection of light on a special paper. It is called a photograph. I come from outside the wall were life is harmonious for humanity. In reality humans are not extinct at all!

…………………

It’s hard to swallow. A victory short lived. They have the proof. His mind goes in a million directions. They are human…... They are us….. An island……..There are nine of them, they have four…...Enough to even the playing field?.....The true enemy? Marley? ………..145 kings? Fritz, Reiss, Zeke Jeager, royal blood?, the beast titan?, they have the advantage, Hange has their work cut off for them. Too many variables, scenarios, possibilities and it’s so overwhelming.

“Erwin”. He’s pulled from his thoughts. “Secure the journals.” Hange nods and escorts Eren and Mikasa out.

“Was it worth it?” Levi asks softly. Erwin closes his eyes and sighs through his nose. Levi breaks the silence with a Tch. “How more shitty can this get?”

“You have a plan?”

But nothing could prepare Erwin for this.

Monsters, no devils of the world Erwin thinks. “In time” he replies. The answer is sufficient for the moment, but it shows in the way Levi leaves the room. Just a little bit longer Levi. A promise he hopes to keep.

#eruri #erwin smith #levi ackerman #snk #aot #katsu gifts #because this is a gift to us tbh #this was so fun and awesome #thank you for participating #i hope you all enjoy these different interpretations!

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serpent-jugheadjones · 6 years

Text

The Partner Revealed - Part 7

Pairing: Jughead Jones x Reader

Description: Revelations on Jason’s case burn through.

Warnings: None I can think of. But I suck at warnings...

Word count: 3281

A/N: Wow, it’s been more than a month since the last part was released and this one is more on the short side. Dog Days final part coming soon :)

Y/N’s point of view

Y/N wakes up in fright, heart pounding off her chest, barely breathing. The loud noises that interrupted her slumber are coming from downstairs. She gets up as quickly and silently as possible and grabs the baseball bat her uncle gave her when she turned 14, which has been neglected to the corner of the room ever since. Gathering all her courage, the girl walks down the stairs slowly, avoiding the creaking steps she learned to skip when sneaking out at night, hoping it’s not Jason’s killer, for a 16-year-old with a bat she doesn't even know how to use won’t stand a chance against someone with a gun that has already killed a teenager.

At the bottom of the stairs someone is coming up with boxes covering their face. She gets scared and swings, missing whoever is there by a hair. “Wow. Sweetie, it’s me.” Her father’s familiar voice calms her. He drops his box at the step and takes the baseball bat from her as she still looks distressed. It takes her a few seconds to process she’s safe, but as soon as she does, her arms are around her father. “No love for moma?” Y/N sees her mother, of whom she’s the spitting image, standing by the open front door. She runs down to hug the woman just as tight as she did her dad. “You guys didn't tell me you were coming.”, she says, happy to see them instead of a killer. “We wanted to surprise you.” “That you sure did.” They all laugh, as that wasn't exactly the welcome they were expecting. “Do you need help unpacking?” Y/N notices the mess everywhere. “No, you go get ready for school. We’ll deal with all this”, her mother instructs, pointing at everything around the living-room with a ‘why did we brought so much stuff’ look.

Y/N gets back to her room without any guilt for not helping them. She’s used to them coming back home with extra luggage. The girl did try to help once, but they just ended up making a bigger mess. It’s a lot earlier than she planned on waking up, so she takes that time to finish her articles for the Blue and Gold. Time flies by and she only notices when her belly roars in hunger. The girl quickly changes out of her pijamas into high waisted jeans and a loose tank top. Reaching the kitchen, she finds suitcases and boxes full of stuff they brought from the trip piled everywhere, making it impossible to eat, let alone cook there. “I’m going to Pop’s for breakfast.”, she shouts grabbing a jacket from the coat hanger. “Wait! We didn't even have time to catch up.” Her mom comes out from behind a pile of boxes. “We’ll do that at dinner, when I come back to this house the way it was before you arrived, young lady.”, Y/N says playfully. “Oh. Bring your boyfriend for dinner.”, Y/F/N requests. “He’s not my boyfriend.” She blushes. “Of course not, you just spend a lot of time with him, talking about him, thinking about him...”, Y/M/N teases. “Ok, I got it. See ya later.” Y/N blows them a kiss and heads out.

The girl is glad to be reminded of Jughead. She texts him on her way to the diner.

From: Y/N

Wanna have breakfast at Pop’s? My treat.

From: Jughead

Would love to, but I’m heading to Betty’s for breakfast. I’m gonna distract her mom while she tries to find out where Polly was taken to.

Y/N doesn't reply, perplexed to why she wasn't included in their plan. She’s not mad at Jug, but rather disappointed in Betty. After the memorial, she was sure they were on the same page. Clearly not. Nonetheless, she’s not gonna let that stop her from getting the best milkshakes in town before class.

Jughead’s point of view

The chair in the Blue and Gold office is way more comfortable than his mattress on the floor. Nevertheless, whenever Jughead tries to sleep there, he ends up staying up late, writing. Tonight is one of those nights. Without any major development on the Jason Blossom case, the novelist doesn't really have much to add to the story but editing is just as important. Jug can’t move past the paragraph about the first time he met Y/N by the edge of Sweet Water River just after the body was removed. It’s the way she’s written in, skeptical and cold, that got him stuck, realizing he doesn't relate to that at all. Even so, at the same time, it’s how he felt back then. Since he promised she’d be the first to read his finished work, the writer can’t imagine letting her read those as his first words about her.

After much editing, he’s finally happy with the end result of Y/N’s introduction to the story. The clock on his screen shows it just turned 6 am. He could try and get some sleep, but the boy remembers the long overdue paper he has to deliver and not a single sentence written yet. School work isn't really his forte. Forty-five minutes go by and Jug’s staring at his laptop screen, motionless, not even all the cold coffee left in his thermos flask would be enough to keep him awake, so he decides to take a power nap before leaving for Betty’s. Jughead just slouches back on the chair and crosses his feet over the table. Leaving the office would mean 15 minutes wasted wondering the school halls till his ‘room’ and he can’t afford to lose a single one. He’s woken up by a text from Y/N, inviting him to eat at Pop’s, rather than his alarm clock.

Of course he would 100 times prefer to have breakfast with Y/N at the Chock’lit Shoppe than with Betty and her mom, but the fate of their investigation could rest with whatever information they can get out of Polly, and for that they need to know where she is. That’s something they can only get from Alice and everything is set for today. Jughead just hopes the Y/H/C girl understands that. He can’t help thinking if she had texted a little earlier he would most definitely have had two breakfasts.

A couple of waffles in, some OJ and both silent and vocal insults from Alice, Betty gives him the sign to get her mom out of the room, which is as easy as asking for the bathroom. When he returns, the blonde is already waiting for him by the front door with an accomplished look. Jughead thanks Alice for the ‘hospitality’ before they leave hurriedly. He can’t wait to share this with Y/N.

Y/N’s point of view

Y/N uses her free period to drop her finished articles at the Blue and Gold not expecting to run into Betty and Jughead in there. “It's a Home for troubled youths.Where disenfranchised teens will learn such virtues as discipline and respect, enjoying lives of quiet reflection and servitude.”, Jug quotes. “Poor Polly.“, Bets says. “So you found out?”, Y/N asks, reveling her presence in the room. She can see the blonde dig her nails in her palms and go from a hateful to calm face within seconds. “Y/N/N! So glad you could join us. Juggie was very helpful in us finding out where Polly is.”, Betty says on fake-nice tone, stroking Jug’s arm, making him cringe and Y/N’s face grow red. “Where is that?”, the Y/H/C girl inquires, trying to not sound weird out by the whole ordeal. “The Sisters of Quiet Mercy. Sounds creepy, I know.”, the raven-haired boy replies. “When are we going?”, Y/N asks enthusiastically, as this would be their first group operation. “I think it’s best if just me and Juggie go. Too many people can call attention.”, the vixen replies coarsely. “I disagree.” Jughead stands up and walks away from Betty. “The more the merrier. If things go south we can create a diversion, plus Y/N can drive us there.” There’s no valid argument Betty could use to explain why she doesn't want Y/N with them. The Y/E/C eyes meet Jug’s blueish ones in gratitude for standing up for her.

The bell for lunch rings and they leave the office to the courtyard. They find the table where Archie is sitting next to Valerie, with a melancholic expression. Betty walks a little faster than them and sits in the corner of the bench, forcing Jug to sit in the middle and Y/N next to him in the other corner. “I think we should do it after school.”, Bets suggests, probably because she knows Y/N has an extra class today. “Sure, that works for me.”, the Y/H/C girl agrees and takes a sip from her soda. Playing Betty’s game isn't really something she wants to do, but she’s not just about to leave Jug alone with her again. “What are you guys talking about? Anything I can help with?”, Archie inquiries, begging to be a part of it, same way Y/N has to fight for her spot in. “What we're attempting is a stealth operation, Archie. If we go in there with the entire Scooby Gang, forget it, we're compromised.”, Jug explains, eating the last of his tortilla chips. The ginger boy looks even more miserable at that, but at soon as Veronica arrives, his gloominess changes, since she offers to play with him at the Variety Show. Y/N understands Jughead’s gestures of asking for her bag of potato chips and gives it to him with a smile, only to watch Betty making fists with her hands once again.

Now that her parents are home, Y/N can’t just skip class so she heads into her classroom acting sick. Lucky for her she’s very convincing and the teacher let’s her out without any problems. She meets Jug and Betty by the front gate so they can walk together to her house where she’ll get her mom’s car to drive them to the Sisters of Quiet Mercy building. The girl asks them to wait on the corner while she gets the car. Y/N’s not in the mood to explain to her parents what they are doing. Not too long goes by and they hear the loud roar of the Impala. “I call shotgun.” Jughead says opening the door so that Betty can seat in the back.

Jughead’s point of view

They arrive at the reception. The place looks more like a prison than a home. Betty hands the nun her ID and she’s allowed in, but Jughead and Y/N have to stay back. “What do you think she’s gonna find?”, the girl asks as they sit on a bench in the lobby. “The truth. Whatever that is.”, he answers. Soon after, they are asked to wait in a room. The doctor insists on them moving, not taking into consideration their attempts to prove they’re fine where they are. “Are we being committed now?” Y/N tries to open the window, to no success. “No. But that may have been a better outcome.” Jug makes her turn around to see Alice Cooper by the door with a furious look.

They are being escorted out by doctors. Before they reach the door, Polly comes out from a corner. She loses control and start screaming at her mom for not telling her what happened to Jason. Y/N tries to block one of the doctors from holding Betty, so the blonde can hug her sister. “Don’t touch her.” Jughead throws himself in front of the Y/H/C girl as the doctor was just about to pin her on the wall. They all watch as the pregnant mourning girl is dragged out. Jug is met with a different, darker view of what he thought was a perfect family.

At the parking lot, Alice instructs Betty to wait in the car and she walks away with both a grateful and apologetic look. Thanks to them, she got to see her sister, although because of that her mother is just about to lecture them. “I didn't expect this of you, Y/N.” The girl can’t meet Mrs. Cooper’s eyes. “She was doing...”, the boy starts. “Jug...” She nods her head from side to side interrupting him. “That’s right, Jughead. Y/N doesn't need you to defend her. She knows she’s wrong.”, Alice spits with her eyes still watery. “No. Betty has a right to know what’s going on with her sister. And THIS... exiling your own daughter because she’s pregnant. I didn't expect THAT from you.” Y/N opens the car door and gets in without looking back at Alice. Jughead follows her actions and they drive away.

“Where should I drop you off?”, she asks. Jughead is silent for a while, figuring out the best way out of this. “How about we just go to Pop’s?”, he suggests, defensively. “Sure. After this, all I need is a double chocolate shake with waffles.” Y/N changes their route to the Chock’lit Shoppe. “Waffles? For dinner?” The raven-haired boy laughs. “Don’t judge me, Mr. Coffee-before-bed-ops-I-have-insomnia.”, the girl teases and they both laugh. Y/N keeping her eyes off the road a little longer than she should’ve. Juggie is sure he caught her glimpsing at his lips but this isn't the right time for it so he just focuses on their order. He’s temped on the waffles as well, but the usual burger wins every time.

Of course he stole a few bites from Y/N’s delicious sweet treat, making the girl fake-mad and him fake-innocent. However, a sweet grin vanishes from his face as fast as it appeared since she offered to drive him home once again. “I think I’m just gonna stay here, enjoy the free coffee refills and write a bit.” Jug hates not being able to tell her why he’s not going home. Luckily she doesn't look suspicious to his reasons for staying. “How about tomorrow we have actual food for dinner? My place?”, Y/N asks confidently. “Sounds good.” The boy loves Pop’s, but the thought of real food makes his stomach fluster. The girl slides off the booth and walks out of the diner, leaving Jug wishing there was a white chocolate and ginger milkshake so he could still smell her.

Y/N’s point of view

Light tapping on Y/N’s bedroom window startles her. “Jug?” She surprises herself as this is the second time she calls him by his nickname. The boy is on a ladder the girl wasn't even aware they owned. “Hey there, Juliet.”, he proclaims, getting in. “You do know we have a front door?”, Y/N asks rhetorically. “There was an unfamiliar car in your driveway.”, he states, looking around the posters on her walls and some of the books on her shelves before turning to face her. “So you decided to climb up?” She waves her hands in confusion. “Could've been the killer. I may as well have saved your life.” Her heart beats faster as he walks closer and closer. “Also...” Jughead breaths in, his eyes switching from her lips to her Y/E/C orbs. He guides his hands to each side of her cheeks. Without hesitation Jug leans in, meeting their lips in a sweet, passionate kiss. Y/N is dazed by his actions and takes a few seconds to kiss back. But their moment is interrupted by her father knocking on the door. “Dinner is almost ready. When is your friend coming?”, he shouts through the hallway. “Soon.”, Y/N replies with a wide smile, looking up at that amazing boy in front of her, who just gave this fortunate overjoyed pleased teen her first kiss.

They walk down the stairs to the kitchen. “Where did Jughead come from?”, her mother asks, suspiciously. “You know Nightcrawler, right? Ta-da!”, Y/N points at the boy, implying he teleported. “Are you hiding a tail under that flannel?”, her father jokes. “No, I've got my holographic clock on.” Jughead shows his wrist, with a bracelet rather a clock, but the reference to X-Men: Evolution still stands. Y/N’s sporting an amazed look at his knowledge on the series. “Ok, Kurt. you can sit here.” Y/F/N point at the seat next to his daughters usual place and winks at the girl. Laughter and conversation fill the room. Y/M/N shares stories about their travel, Y/F/N talks about some of his less bloody cases, and Jughead gives them movies suggestions. Y/N is loving every second of it. However, as soon as they finish the main course, Jug’s phone buzzes. He shows Y/N the text.

From: Betty

Meet me at route 40 by the Maple Syrup sign.

Both teens look at each other, knowing they have to go, because it could be about the case they are desperate to solve. “Mom, we’re gonna skip desert, we have to go meet some friends.”, Y/N tells them, seeing the disappointed look in Jug’s face. “That’s ok, honey. Call us if you’re gonna be later than really late.”, her mother says. “Thank you for dinner Mr. and Mrs. Y/L/N. It was delicious.”, Jughead says. “Oh, please. Calls us Y/M/N and Y/F/N and you’re very welcome.”, her father replies, taking out their plates.

Y/N parks the Impala when she spots Betty by the roadside under the pouring rain. She doesn't look happy, and not about being soaking wet, but at the sight of an accompanied Jughead. “How...” The blonde doesn't even have time to finish when Jug cuts her off. “I was having dinner at Y/N’s when I got your text. It, seemed odd you didn't send her one.”, he speaks firmly, making sure this doesn't go any further. “So, why are we here?”, Y/N asks, looking around. “Polly told me about a getaway car Jason had ready for them. I wonder if it’s still here.”, Betty says, handing each a flashlight and directing them towards the sign. Even with the little visibility they have it’s not hard to find the vehicle, covered with tarpaulin and leafs as it has been there for a while now.

They remove the protective layers and open the trunk, revealing suitcases and Jason’s varsity jacket. “What are those?”, Betty asks, pointing at something in plastic wrap. “Drugs...” Jughead picks one up. “JUG!”, Y/N shouts, making him drop the evidence. “Fingerprints...”, she explains, rubbing everything they touched with the sleeve of her sweater. “This is all evidence, we need to talk to Sheriff Keller and get Polly.”, the blonde girl states. “This whole car is a crime scene.” Jughead takes a few pictures with his phone before they leave to warn the Sheriff about it.

Sadly, by the time Sheriff Keller arrives at the site, the car is in flames, and Polly isn't at The Sisters of Quiet Mercy anymore.

#Sorry this took so long #And is so short #Jughead Jones #Jughead Jones x Reader #Jughead x Reader #Forsythe Pendleton Jones III #Riverdale #Riverdale Imagine #riverdale imagines #jughead jones imagine #Jughead Jones III #Juggie Jones #Jughead imagines #Jughead Jones imagines #imagine #fanfic

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theresultinghealthandexercisebe · 4 years

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How to Make It As a Fitness Model!

So You Wanna Be a Fitness Model?

"Do I need to compete?"

Now. If you compete for the fun of it, then by all means go for it, but the above is focusing on competing as it relates to the business aspect of being a fitness model.

Right body, wrong federation?

The following week I was judging an NPC fitness, figure, and bodybuilding show and there she was. How did she do? She won the entire show with all judges voting her number one unanimously.

(1) find out exactly what the judging criteria is for that federation and

(2) go see those shows as a spectator for several different federations and see which one your physique, style, etc will fit into best.

(3) You have to decide if you truly have the athletic abilities to compete in a fitness competition (which requires a routine) or a figure/bikini competition.

Networking 101: dos and don'ts...

Who loves you baby?

"How do I get in the magazines?"

Beware of web idiots, schlubs, morons, perverts, scum bags, and sleazoids!

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