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#but there is nothing bad about the other way to be clear
taskforce420 · 11 hours
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leaked. simon 'ghost' riley
it was obvious something had happened, the way people stared at you as you walked past them, they watched as your hips moved, and chest bounced. however- you couldn't understand why everyone had taken some kind of liking to your figure randomly. there was no need for them to, you wore the same kind of clothes everyday around the base.
it wasn't until your captain jogged over to you and pulled you into his office, along with your fellow team mates, that you finally realised something bad had happened. it was obvious that your captain, price, felt a little uncomfortable in explaining the situation. he stumbled over his words a little, he cleared his throat far to much and for gods sake- why does he keep pacing?!
"for christ sake cap, what's goin' on?" you finally spoke up, looking at him and everyone else in the room with a frown. price, and the others looked down as you spoke, apart from one. ghost.
"the fella you, stupidly, got yourself associated with- has leaked somethin' of yours" ghost spoke with his awfully dull tone. you could have sworn you felt you heart and soul leave your body, my eyes stayed glued to his.
"what.." you finally muttered out, in complete and utter disbelief. the man you once trusted with those kind of photos had completely disregarded your wishes of deleting those images you had sent him a while ago.
"he hasn't sent them to anyone, but he's been showing them to people." ghost continued on, crossing his arms across his chest and looking down at you. he was...disappointed in you, thought you were better then to send those kind of photos to someone; but we all know he didn't understand why you did what you did, he doesn't understand why anyone does it to be honest.
you were stunned, how the hell were you supposed to get out of this? sure you could talk to that foolish man you once liked, but that probably wouldn't end very well, you couldn't delete it off his phone..
"what am i supposed to do?" you finally spoke up, your voice a little shaky and desperate. it was embarrassing to admit but you sent those photos because he asked you to and you thought, you liked him; but little did you know you was using him as a distraction. trying to keep you feelings hidden for someone else.
it sounds bad, but he was using you just as much as you were using him. he only cared about one thing, nudes, and he was willing to do whatever he could to get them off you and if that meant filling your head with sweet nothings then that's exactly what he'd do.
price looked up as you spoke, he heard the pain in your voice and god it was horrible. he knew about the issues of men leaking photos around the base, it happened more often then he'd like to admit, but seeing you in this mess; a sweet, caring lady with the desire to do good and treat those around her with nothing but respect, pissed him off.
it pissed everyone off, soap, gaz, but one in particular was ghost.
you couldn't tell, but his eyes were squinted, his teeth clenched, his breathing heavy, and his hand squeezing his own bicep out of anger. sure, it was annoyed at you, but he was far more angry at the man who threw your trust out of the window and purposefully showed you off. how could he?!
"i'll talk to em'" ghost finally spoke up, you and the others looked at him, dumbfounded.
"si, you don't have to do that. i-i'll handle it on my own, after all its m-" he cut you off, you were right. it was your own fault, but he knew how you felt and he was not about to let you deal with it on your own.
"don't be daft, i'll sort it" and he was gone. straight out the door of caps office. the door slammed behind him and you bit your cheek nervously.
"well, thats tha' sorted" soap said, and god was he right.
it was only the next day, and people stopped staring. their eyes no longer followed you or your chest as you walked, no, instead they stared at the ground or simply refused to look your way. it was hard not to smile to yourself. oh, simon. the man you are.
it was now even more harder to mask your feelings for him, he helped you, without a second thought.
where you walked into his office to ask him about it, he immediately looked up at you, his hands stopped typing away at the computer. you let out a small hi, as you closed the door to his office and made your way to the desk.
he replied with a small nod of his head and a quick, you okay?. "im okay, thank you for talking to him" tilting your head a little with a small smile.
he took notice of you small gesture and smirked under his mask, so pretty.. he leaned back into the chair. "'course love".
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paper-mario-wiki · 1 day
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"no art is good bc it's a misconfiguration of the natural world to suit man's vanity" Is an extremely misanthropic take on art. Is humanity not part of "the natural world"? Can one not make pigments from flowers or minerals? You say that the universe would never align so that a piece of art is made without human intervention, but the universe did align so that it could be made, you just assume humans aren't part of it. I understand that this is some faux-deep shit I'm on, but I love art and while I think good is kind of useless adjective when talking about art in general, to compare the concept of art to a tumor is a pretty bad faith take. Sorry if that was like, ironic or something and I just sent a rant into your inbox for nothing.
your faux-deep shit could never reach the faux-depths of my even shallower faux-deepness.
i think the main problem when establishing this argument in the first place was saying "all art is bad" because someone asked me if i liked any bad art, and i answered using "bad" as a shorthand for "not good". if i had known i'd be getting into this pedantic of an argument about it i definitely would have changed my wording, because things that are "not good" are not inherently "bad", which seems to be where the majority of the misunderstandings of my stance come from.
i'd ask you this: what could be considered "good" outside of something that affects humanity in some capacity? to be clear, you're absolutely right, humans ARE natural, humans ARE part of the world. but the idea of something being "good" didn't exist until humans came up with it.
100,000,000,000,000,000 light years away, two planets crash into each other, each with their own forms of biological life so different from earth's that we would find it difficult to even classify it as life if we were given the chance to observe it, but that doesn't matter because we would have never been given the opportunity to reach those planets anyway under any circumstances. is this a good thing? is it a bad thing? i don't think it's either, it's just something that happened.
because "good" and "bad" are code words used to reflect the societal values of the person using them, they cannot exist in a vacuum.
so if that's the case, and "good" and "bad" only exist to us, what does it mean to us?
well, something "good" is something with objective benefit or subjective enjoyment-- but subjective enjoyment of something can also contradict the nature of its objectivity. soup can be considered "good" because it sustains us and is therefore beneficial. soup can be considered to "taste good" because someone might enjoy the flavor. but "torture" can only be seen as "enjoyable", but it benefits nobody-- even if the person doing it enjoys it. that's just them subjectively enjoying it.
conversely, something can be objectively good but still subjectively unenjoyable, like having a soup that's healthy in a way you think tastes bad! you'd still benefit from it, even if you didn't enjoy the experience. but regardless of whether or not you enjoyed it, what has the greatest bearing on something being considered "good" is its objectivity, as it's something fewer people can debate.
now, all of that being considered, what can "art" do that is objectively good, without it serving some secondary purpose? something that is objectively good can be artistically created, like a children's hospital designed by a genius architect-- but its goodness in that case would be derived from its benefit, with the subjectivity of it being something that only enhances its good.
a piece of fabric, stretched across a wooden frame and painted using colorful oils, creates no benefit objectively, it exists solely in the world of subjectivity. how can something be "good" if the only thing it does is hold the potential (not the guarantee) for a person to look at it, and enjoy looking at it?
more importantly though, is that bad? it's not.
but it is superfluous.
^ please forgive me for typing all of this. im so sorry. it's just so easy to be pedantic. i promise im not a stick in the mud and i love art, i just also happen to be someone who is personally deeply concerned with rhetorically whittling communication down to the bare knob of its meaning (XRA style).
because it is something i find subjectively enjoyable.
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farmhandler · 1 day
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for those of you who do follow me on tumblr, you get a sneak peek... because I love you... (continued after ch9)
“Hey,” Scott said, catching Logan’s attention as he started moving away towards the stairs. Logan had agreed to stick to one of the empty conference rooms upstairs for a while to avoid startling any of the kids.
“Ugh, this guy again,” Wade muttered.
“What is it?” Logan said.
“I wanted to say I’m sorry,” Scott said. He sounded sheepish, of all things. “About you two, I didn’t—I’m not—what I said back there isn’t how I am. It wasn’t what I meant. This whole thing—”
“Scott,” Logan said, cutting him off. He raised a hand. “It’s…you were an asshole about a lot of it, but I get it. This whole situation is fucking weird for me, too. A lot has changed. I’m not exactly the same guy I was when I knew you—the other me knew you. I’d probably be worse than you are in your position.”
“Should I be offended by that?” Wade said.
Scott seemed relieved, shoulders slumping. “Good. You guys are—I mean if you’re happy, that’s—that’s good. Deadpool has caused a lot of damage, and I mean a lot—"
“Feeling slightly offended now!”
“—but clearly there’s something there most of us haven’t seen. Colossus has been pushing to include him more often. And he did complete that mission for us. So maybe there’s some hope we'll make an X-Man out of him yet.”
“X-Person,” Wade corrected primly. “X-Them, if you will.”
Scott’s head turned briefly towards Wade, nodded, then back to Logan. “I’ll see you soon. It’s…it’s good to see you, Logan.” Emotion crept into his voice. “I mean it.”
“You too, Scott.” Logan said. Understatement of the year. “I’ll see you.”
They moved upstairs to the empty conference room. Logan had suggested Wade could leave if he wanted, but Wade shot it down.
“And miss the big family reunion? Hell no!”
“I don’t think you’re gonna get to be there,” Logan admitted. “Pretty sure it’s just going to be me, at least for now. This whole thing is…fuckin’ unreal. Surreal.”
“Lame,” Wade drawled. “I did all the fucking work. I should get to be there. So unfair. What am I supposed to do while you’re gone? I want to be where the action is.”
“Yeah, well, nothing’s going to be fun about this. Probably just a lot of talking and shit. I really fucking hate this part.”
“Are you hungry?” Wade asked out of nowhere. “Because I’m starving. They said they have lunch, right?”
Logan blinked. “Yeah. Yeah, I can get you some food. There’s a chef on duty every school day. Colossus said there’d be food.”
After checking the coast was clear, they went back downstairs. Logan felt absolutely ridiculous in his yellow suit, but standing next to Wade in his red, it wasn’t so bad. They made it to the kitchen and Logan stole a few sandwiches, handing one off to Wade.
It felt so…normal. Logan hated that he couldn’t relax, that he still felt on edge, but tried to focus on Wade.
Like he could tell Logan needed the distraction, he started talking about one of the times he’d visited the mansion and destroyed something while he devoured his sandwich. Several somethings, in fact—“Just a few statues of old white dudes”—and Logan watched him, eyes lingering on the way Wade’s mouth moved with the mask rolled up. He loved that mouth. Loved Wade, even when he was doing all the shit he wasn’t supposed to do. Even terrorizing the X-Men. He fucking loved him.
“And then even though I said ‘no touching’," Wade said, pulling his mask back down, "Colossus grabs me by the throat, which is one of my biggest turn-ons, and then he—”
“Hey,” Logan said, stopping Wade in the empty hallway. He kept his ears open, but everyone was in their classrooms. “I’m gonna kiss you.”
“I’m sorry, I misheard. I thought I heard you say you were going to kiss me.”
Logan reached over and undid the back of Wade’s mask. Wade’s hands clamped over his, but Logan only rolled it up again so his mouth was exposed. He backed Wade up against the wall and kissed him.
“Well, well, well,” Wade said when he pulled away. “I never took you for a sexual deviant. In public? My oh my, Mr. Wolverine. Kiss me again and make it sloppy.”
“It’s just a kiss,” Logan said, chuckling. The chuckle turned into a laugh. He kissed him once, then twice. The third time Logan shoved his tongue in Wade’s mouth, over his teeth, tasting him, and slid his hands around the back of Wade’s neck. He felt Wade’s moan reverberate in his mouth.
That was when Wade stopped him. “Don’t look to your right,” he whispered loudly.
God damn it. Logan tapped his fist on the wall next to Wade’s head.
“And you’re just now telling me.”
“I assumed you could smell them and didn’t care, peanut,” Wade said. As Logan moved, he quickly rolled his mask back down over his face. “You should see their faces.”
“I literally do not understand this,” Scott said beside them. “Not the you and Deadpool thing—I mean I don’t understand that either—but…you’re sure you’re the same Logan? You have never smiled like that.”
“Not for you,” Logan said, turning around fully. “Word to the fucking wise for everyone here. I will not put up with the shit I heard earlier from Scott or anyone else. If I hear one word said about Wade that isn’t directly regarding his behavior, we will have a fucking problem. Are we clear?”
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days-until-burnout · 3 days
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For whenever you're feeling better and refreshed and not burnt out!!! :
Scott x Impulse, romantic pairing, first kisses and/or cuddling perhaps?
(also!! Thank you for doing all of these stories, they're incredible!!!)
thank you for reading! and sorry i couldnt make them justice. _____
📧 Day 73 -
Characters - Impulse/Scott Words - 702 Time - 25 mins Content - Band AU
In between blinks and flashes of light, from one thundering moment to the bustling next, the show is over. The crowd is cleared out and they are ushered to the back, alcohol wipes for their faces and water bottles for their dry mouths. Everything happens quickly, at least their side happens quickly as they are in the car then their hotel room in a single breath.
(Well, more than that, but it feels the same.)
"Ough, I hate morning flights," Scott gripes from the en-suite. His voice is louder than his phone taps, which brings an amused smile to Impulse's lips. "Absolutely ridiculous. I'm going to have no time to get ready."
Impulse chuckles, sends the last few texts before pocketing his phone. "I mean, you don't have to get dressed up and all facied out."
Scott gasps, offended. "Public appearances, Impy, public appearances."
Impulse says nothing else, instead, he shoves the still warm towel on his face, rubbing a little hard to get all the glitter from his face. It had been at Gem's insistence, for their initial gigs, and now it became a stapple. Hate is a too strong word, and dislike is hardly comparable.
There is a quiet sigh as Scott saunters out of the en-suite, robe tight on his body, damp hairs shaken from his forehead, skin clear. Impulse gives him a look, and Scott can only dramatically fall on the bed.
Scott does not sleep, however, but he lays on his side, arm perched and apple of his cheek on the heel of his palm. "Well then, we have yet to discuss sleeping arrangements. How will we do this? I don't want to—"
"We'll share, that's what we agreed on. Did you forget?"
One thing, a very good thing about Scott's pale skin, is that Scott blushes easily. Noticeably. Not like those subtle blushes when he is teasing someone or playing a part, but a deep blush when he is taken by surprised. Like now, rendering him speechless as Impulse looks at him over his shoulder.
"Plus, the couch is too small for either of us. Gem, maybe, but she's got her room."
It happens between heartbeats, Impulse wipes the sides of his face, his hairline, then tosses the towel among the dirty pile. Nonchalantly, he makes his way to the lightswitch and turns it off, using his phone's light to guide him to the bed.
Every step, Scott follows, mouth agape and utter… blankness in his eyes. Unlike other times, Scott takes longer to recover and retort. Impulse will like to think it has something to do with tiredness, though he knows it has everything to do with the headlines from ealier that morning.
'Impulse isn't bad on the eyes,' Scott had said with that flirty tone of his, the smoothness and confidence that everyone knows and expects. It had been on defence of yet another rumor, something stupid Impulse did not even bother remembering. He had missed the interview, having been in another by himself at the same time because of some miscommunication. But he had seen the clip, and he had seen Scott stumble when Gem mentioned the possibility that Scott might like him more than just eye-candy.
Impulse is not one to rush to conclusions, but facts are facts, and his phone is telling him that is nearly midnight, so they should both sleep. He slides under the covers, leaning over to press a brief kiss in a still frozen Scott, something small under his temple, beside his eye. Not quite where he had planned, but the little light made it hard to aim.
"G'night, Scott. And by the way, I think you're good on my eyes, great even."
It takes a while longer, that edge where Impulse can only respond with a hum to Scott's voice, his eyes refuse to open and his pillow too comfortable. Despite that, his brain is barely awake enough to feel him, finally moving. Settling behind.
Nothing grand, nothing loud or flashy, just arms around his back, a burning face pressing on the back of his neck.
Impulse drifts off not long after, and he likes to image the whispered confession is not something he dreamt.
_____
sigh. brain will brain brain one of these days</3
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tennessoui · 7 months
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i don’t like hunger games au at all, and i avoid reading not completed fics generally but can i say. Can i say that your hunger games fic is the only think i’ve been capable of thinking for the last days and it’ s only the first chapter? the snippet of the dinner scene —"will you love me if i come back a monster?" / "i will always love you anakin"— made me lose my breathe jesus christ. this fic is everything i ever asked — unhinged lovers for each other, anakin being that younger version of vader who bite onto obiwan and never will let him go, obiwan too addicted to loving and be loved by anakin to standing the thought of losing him, codependency relationship based on needs and possessiveness and crazy addiction they will die if it’s not for this love? the "marriage vows who sealed the death of twenty three kids" line ? i can’t breathe you’re a genius
ahh thank you for giving my hunger games au a chance even though it is both a hunger games au and a wip!! i think having a lot written on tumblr really helps because it gives such a good outline of what the fic will become and what the story will be for both characters - putting it on ao3 is really just fleshing it out and making it sing as a written work
i think what i always struggle with when it comes to aus of other media is the instinct i have to make them 1:1 aus, which is what i call aus where i'm subbing my ship in for the characters of the media, i.e. putting anakin in for katniss and obi-wan in for peeta and pressing play.
at that point im like. why not just read the book if that's what i want to see, so that's something i like about this hunger games au because i'm just using the setting & the premise - anakin isn't meant to be a sub-in for katniss as the tribute and obi-wan isn't meant to be a sub in for peeta as the love interest or haymitch as the mentor and so i find writing it so much easier - i feel less constrained than i would if i was trying to make anakin feel like anakin skywalker from star wars, and also my own character for this fic and also katniss from this different media altogether
and yeah it's fun to make them fucked up and crazy about each other in new and different ways and so im so glad the first chapter has been posted and i can work on the second one now because damn that reaping is gonna be so fun
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toddtakefive · 4 months
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thinking about todd and his resolve toward… not quite isolation, but being alone in a room full of people again. he goes along to the study room to sit on his own and do his homework, he sits at the poets table and follows along with what’s being said while keeping quiet, he goes to the meetings at all but doesn’t necessarily contribute (in fact, if you watch him when cameron is telling the story ‘from camp in sixth grade’, you can see that he recognizes it before any of the other poets but doesn’t voice it until they all have). he’s not alone, necessarily, if you want to get technical about it, he’s just lonely, and he’s generally okay with that. he doesn’t have friends and that’s fine, he doesn’t participate in class and that’s fine, he doesn’t have a relationship with his family and that’s fine—he could live without any real connection and he’d have been, more or less, fine.
the thing about when he says “i can take care of myself just fine!” is that he isn’t really wrong, you can infer that he’s been doing it his entire life anyway, it’s that ‘taking care of yourself’ isn’t the same thing as really living or being happy. todd’s an introvert, certainly, and even as he gets closer to the group he defaults to sitting quietly in the background, but he’s also denying himself community out of fear not introversion. todd isn’t friendless because he’s an introvert, although that definitely plays a part, he’s friendless because he pushes anyone that might want his company away. if anyone has every wanted for his attention in the first place. (neil’s unwavering interest in him is unique (even when it comes to the rest of the poets, who are fine with todd coming along and joining the group, but aren’t really hellbent on him being there in the beginning) and his refusal to accept it is a direct result of being so lonely growing up.)
there’s obviously something to be said about the implications of his parents neglect, and the more than likely fact that he grew up friendless, and how those both play a part in in him being so skilled at dodging social interaction/being so avoidant of it, but by the time we see him in the movie he’s all but accepted his fate as being alone his entire life. he’s already accepted being the family disappointment, and he’s already accepted he’ll never amount to anything, and he obviously doesn’t like it, but he’d have managed living with that knowledge without the confirmation that it was all wrong. would he have been miserable? almost certainly. but he’d have managed. he’d done it for that long already, anyhow.
#and like obviously it’s BAD in the long run and his isolation IS only making his life worse but… genuinely he’d have been alright#all things considered#it’s super interesting to me how it’s neil who starts the domino effect of todd’s life becoming Less Shit#both by beliving in him and putting faith in him that he’s never seen before and refusing to let him hide away#but it isn’t a savior moment on neil’s part#and i find it so odd when people frame it as one#todd is like… actively irritated at him in that scene 😭#neil is right that todd needs to get out of his shell and put himself out there and Believe in himself#but todd can’t accept it yet because he can’t see what neil sees in him yet and doesn’t believe it exists at all#and it frustrates him because unlike everyone else neil REFUSES to give up on him#and as far as todds concerned it’ll be for nothing#as far as todd’s concerned ​neil isn’t a savior or a hero in that scene he’s an annoyance#a necessary one in the grand scheme of things but an annoyance all the same#i think people forget that just because todd DOES want to break out of his shell (‘don’t you think you could be?’ / ‘no! i… i don’t know!’ +#‘come on you heard keating don’t you want to *do* something about it?’ / ‘*yes* but…’) doesn’t mean he knows how or believes he actually CAN#todds autonomy can be taken away from him a lot (ironic) and he can be twisted into someone with no opinions or thoughts or whims +#outside of neil but that isn’t really the case#and a part of that blame lands on the movie because todd doesn’t get explored a lot but there’s still evidence of him being his own person#he’s not a yesman and he tells neil when his ideas are stupid (keeping the audition from his father) or he just doesn’t personally agree +#(the entire ‘no’ scene) and he functions perfectly well when neil isn’t around and while they aren’t focuses +#there are short scenes where todds alone or scenes that start eith them apart that make it clear they aren’t attatched to each other +#in the way people can often write them to be (that is in the trenches if the other is missing)#this post and all these tags are my long winded way of saying FUCK the codependent anderperry thing some people subscribe to it makes me#mad#neil’s goal is to help todd grow into himself and become his own person and find his identity more than anything#and todd doesn’t need neil to hold his hand to do literally anything and everything he’s a normal guy with anxiety#come on guys#dps#dead poets society#todd anderson
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zeb-z · 10 months
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Bad has so many reasons to be cautious, even paranoid, as anyone else on the island. From Federation nonsense to Dapper being kidnapped to the whole purgatory nonsense to whatever fuckass suit of armor “old friend” was setting up cameras in his house. But it compounds on his regular overly aware paranoid self to this state of hyper-paranoia. And as a demon who can and usually will lie, cheat, steal, and use sneaky underhanded tactics, he expects the craziest extent because he thinks of it, realizes it’s possible, and would use it himself. We saw this very obviously in purgatory - when he thought greens desperate last ditch effort to balance the scale was a super planned out tactic to tip the scale, so he did it first, all the hardcore base hunting, the spawn killing, there’s a reason every other tactic he used usually followed a main channel qsmp post with updated rules - all usually things he was surprised no one else thought of. But then this also piles onto the fact that he has to have things go his way, all the time, and that he’s argumentative as all get out, which led to the debate between him and Bagi yknow. Especially because he’s not just doing it for the sake of being right, he doesn’t think he’s paranoid, but that he’s exercising the right amount of caution.
So like. Listen dude. Yeah he’s got reasons to be paranoid. But his thought process around building vaults for separate cookie caches like they locked up the risus pills, only to scrap it because it’s not perfectly impenetrable, is extreme. His character has hardly been a leading example in someone who has reasonable reactions to things. And even when there isn’t his own children’s livelihoods potentially on the line, he has a need for control, and the most control he has is if he keeps the cookies in his inventory at all times. If he makes himself the sole point in which the others can get ones in a case of emergency, then he can control the variables. The problem is he’s unreliable about himself when he’s at his most rational and healthiest, and he’s far worse with the current memory and health issues he’s been mostly unaware of.
I dunno it’s like. There is never going to be a purely impenetrable base. And it’s not just a case of “Bagi just hasn’t lived through __ yet!”. Bad’s own logic about keeping the cookies on him at all times is flawed under his own logic, because Bagi is right - if someone has enough drive to break into separate secured cookie caches purely for the downfall of eggs, they more than certainly have enough drive to find a way to kill Bad and just take them from his inventory, or to just kill the eggs themselves. All it truly does is give Bad a sense of control, and soothe his paranoia.
#everyone let’s remember rurus’ tweet about bad NOT being in the blunt rotation. he would try to pluck cameras out of your eyes. and he will#make it seem like it’s the most reasonable thing to do in that moment#now this is more me complaining about shit I’ve been seeing on Twitter in the tags <3 love and peace but I’ve got beef#side note - to say the people who are commenting on qBad’s paranoia or this and that are all newcomers who just ‘weren’t there to experienc#-the dark times’ or ‘weren’t there for the egg deaths/nightmares’ like you are not immune to the way bbh can make something seem so#reasonable#he’s got his own reasons to be paranoid. and most everyone agreed that the base idea of a ‘cookie jar’ would need rethinking with security#but to say qBagi (or Jorge’s/other viewers) is shortsighted or naive. when qBad is THE definition of paranoia. of overreacting. like#qBad’s reaction extends from a mixture of care hyper paranoia and trauma response (which is half that hyper paranoia)#and he will pick and pick and pick until there’s nothing left to pick at#sometimes this is helpful. a lot of the time it’s not#and on the flip side it’s like y’all bad cares about the eggs to a ridiculous degree don’t be silly here okay. he does this because he care#even without a memory in his brain he calls them ‘little one’ and is gentle like. he cares#but at the same time this doesn’t always justify his nonsense. his thought processes. he’s Uber hyper paranoid and not easy to reason with#he’s selfish he can and will jump to extremes he’s overly controlling. and he’s the worlds most unreliable narrator#I’ve been saying this I’ll keep saying this he’s an unreliable narrator! this doesn’t make everything he says or thinks bullshit but you#cannot take what he says to himself how he justifies his actions etc etc in private at face value. unless he is making it EXPLICITLY CLEAR#he’s talking from a meta perspective as the creator of his character#you have to take his perspective with a grain of salt. because he will ‘I’m just a little guy and the world is out to get me’ his way outta#everything#there is a difference between reasonable caution from learned past experiences and overly anxious paranoid responses#idk I’m running out of steam sorry this is like a second post with the tags#and again I say this as a huge qBbh enjoyer lmao#mcyt#qsmp#q!bbh#q!bagi#z speaks
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desperatecheesecubes · 3 months
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Listen, i don’t think Clark is Kons dad nor do I want him to be but I’m still delighted every time he acts paternally towards him
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tapewormsoda · 4 months
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breakups are so fucking weird. three years and just like that it's gone. huh
#helix.txt#gross i ended up spilling my guts in tags. look at them fucking writhing on the floor all bloody#dont rb please#vent#to quote fall out boy i knew it was over i just didn't know the date#yeah that's it. fall out boy can fix this.#i will feel better if i go listen to bang the doldrums#and infinity on high in general#and folie a deux. folie a fucking deux how i love that album#my chem will make me better. gerard way save me#god what a weird feeling. you used to know me better than any other person but then you moved hundreds of miles away and it worked#for a while. then two years later you said it wasnt working and that this was best for both of us. guess i never got the memo for that one#hope we treat other people better because i wasn't as kind as i should have been towards the end and you were never as thoughtful or con-#-siderate as i needed towards the end. we grew apart because you're bad at keeping contact over messaging#and in some ways the cracks in the foundation that grew from that were my fault too i guess. our conversations always felt one sided#maybe i was smothering you#you could never seem to keep more than a passing recollection of the things i liked or even pay much attention to them#but i wasn't great about that either#we just became different people. you weren't what i wanted or needed and you couldn't do long distance. whatever#i know it was the right thing i just wish it hadn't made me feel so damn awful#will we still talk after this? who knows. we didn't end on bad terms but things are definitely weird#and considering your track record with people you can only talk to online i'm not optimistic#you tried to break things off initially by saying you'd said you would improve in the past with nothing to show for it#something i didn't disagree with but i said it didn't bother me much. and it didn't#but it's complicated now. i did deserve better. but you made it clear i'm not getting it from you#you weren't as present or thoughtful as i needed#i wasn't there in person the way you needed and certainly not as considerate as i should have been. and for that second part i'm truly sorr#anyways. sorry. i'd been thinking about it for a long time anyway. i didn't want to admit it because i didn't like to think#about what it might bring. maybe i should have been braver#right. that's enough
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gen-is-gone · 8 months
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I can't go five minutes in DW fandom without people being just atrociously mean about things that I love with the blissful unawareness of majority mainstream opinion holders that the people they're being mean about are like. In the space with them. And this in a space full of ardent fans of arguably some of the most esoteric obscure side stuff that everyone else disdains or doesn't even know. And I'm having fun for the most part but also like. It's just exhausting, constantly goddamn exhausting.
#this is about moffat and eleven#in case that wasn't clear#megan whines into the empty abyss of cyberspace#i'm not gonna say that Lawrence Miles in particular doesn't have every reason to hate Moffat#or that as an EDA fan first and foremost I don't also side eye the fuck out of a lot of his early arc plots#but Moffat wrote *characters* in a way that no one before or since does#everyone droning on about rtd found family has nothing on 11 and 12 era character relationships#also yeah it is genuinely annoying and upsetting that people are STILL going on and on and on and on about ~bad vibes~ ~misogyny~ whatever#like that's just your opinion man#and I think certain fans would genuinely be shocked to actually acknowledge that some people just straight up disagree with them#and straight up have a different experience with that era of the show#and don't share the opinions that got so saturated with so little pushback that the arguments are by now parodies of themselves#like do you hate eleven's era because you formed that opinion yourself or do you hate eleven's run because hbomb made a video?#do you feel the way you feel because you came to that opinion or because others in fandom 'warned' you about moffat before you started?#also like ngl it just straight up hurts my feelings#it's mean! it's just really mean and I'm tired of getting my feelings hurt in situations that are meant to be fun!#I lived through this ten years ago when I'd watch Dr Who and then get on the internet to talk about it#and every post would be just endless bad faith nitpicking and tearing the episode apart#anyway gonna watch power of the daleks now and remind myself not to engage w nuwho fandom
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piplupod · 2 months
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#i just wish someone would look at me and Know that im not doing well fjfkdl#struggling so hard to stop myself from taking self destructive action against myself bc boy howdy i just want to fuck myself up#and then maybe someone would look at me and go ''hey u dont look like ur doing so well - do u need anything?''#but thats never worked in the past and theres that whole thing of ''if u want help u need to ask for it''#unfortunately. asking doesnt seem to work very often. i seem to have to Show people somehow that im not okay. like prove it to them#both medical ppl and my family fjfkdl#so here i am again trying to stop myself from [redacted] bc I shouldnt have to prove to anyone that im not okay#honest to god idk who to even talk to about anything. like the workers at the centre are not counselors/therapists#and i dont have another counseling appt for three ish weeks so uhhh#but im kind of like... i need smth idk. i feel like im on the verge of some kind of really bad breakdown#i cannot keep going on the way i currently am - that much is clear.#but idk what can change really. other than getting the girl to give me space fjfkdl#but the bugs and the abuse and the exhaustion and the food will all continue to exist just the same#nothing can be done about any of that! RIP!#i think honestly i just want a good long hug fjdkdl im just so scared and tired fjfkdl and tired of being scared tbqh#oh well !!! i cannot want for what i cannot have! wants don't exist unless i can fulfill it myself easily! otherwise theyre not allowed!!!#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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exopelagic · 3 months
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this election feels so hollow even though it’s likely ostensibly gonna be a good outcome. labour really just sucks fucking ass rn huh
#if the tories lose bad enough to make lib dems the opposition though… a guy can hope#I think it’s the fact that this is the first general election I can vote in that’s making me lose my mind a little here#I have done basically nothing but read today. I DO know a whole bunch more abt voting systems and the nightmare the tories have been now tho#I’m just kinda like. okay so what happens next? bc labour WILL do some decent shit but they also. fucking suck.#planning to look into the local green party once I’m back at uni bc I could actually do stuff there#I think I’m just dealing with a little bit of whiplash going from doing a biology degree where Everything is about climate change#like unambiguously it gets brought up in every topic (I DO focus on ecology and agricultural stuff and not like genetics but still)#clear consensus from literally everyone you talk to that shit has to happen right the fuck now.#it’s not even like I’m unaware of the state of policy rn I KNOW it’s a nightmare to do anything but we at least TALK about it#and then this election where it’s barely a footnote. biggest thing is the sewage dumping everyone’s talking about and yeah fucking finally#but is that all you’ve got?? the labour manifesto is bleak. it has a section and the stuff they’re proposing isn’t bad but it’s so little#and yeah no they’ve changed the official line on the manifesto to ‘make Britain a clean energy superpower’#I SWEAR it was different a few days ago#maybe I’m being pessimistic bc their plans for clean energy if they actually do them could be huge especially if they manage it by 2030.#it’s just that I know what the targets are and they’re already pulling back on shit like EVs bc of the shift right and I am So Tired#two party politics is a curse. as much as reform is an actual nightmare them getting a decent vote share might actually be the thing that#gets people talking abt proportional representation again bc they are nothing if not good at being loud#did you know we had a fucking referendum in 2011 bc what the fuck. and it went SO BADLY even though people generally supported it#god idk I think I’m once again being naively optimistic about people and election coverage has been very good at knocking me down a bit#people generally are good. I have to believe this. but man the british public is making that really fucking hard#genuinely I think a good chunk of that is down to first past the post driving politics to be divisive and aggressive#like is it the only problem? fuck no. but it’s definitely poisoning the way this shit goes bc when all the parties do is jab at each other#what are we actually doing here#idk I’m gonna stop now but this is taking up a ridiculous amount of bandwidth rn I can’t wait for it to be over#already dreading what the next election could look like in 4 years if starmer continues to suck ass bc I don’t trust him to not like at all#luke.txt#I said i was done but I just looked at the lib dem manifesto and oh my god it’s actually pretty good on this? holy fucking shit
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solipseismic · 9 months
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how is it that we get a roommate to replace the former roommate whom we had beef with for screaming at their video games and the new roommate does the same exact thing but with a different emotion. like didn't we get you to avoid this exact scenario
#granted there were a lot of other worse and different reasons why we kicked alyx out#however;#and granted we did say at the beginning of this thing that new roommate is a twitch streamer and games a lot so this may be an issue#HOWEVER.#4 days out of the week i have to text this fuckass to keep it down bc i hear them shrieking clear across the house at 1am after they? idk?#get shot by a 13 yr old in fortnite?#get good i guess!#genuine rage over this due to i can hear them yelling right now (it is 1130 pm)#and it isnt even a good game. and? you aren't even good at it.#idk. skill issue on both counts! i dont have a bad time in game bc im good at it. and even when i do i am not making noises#especially not noises that can be heard across a hallway and two (2) doors#like the most insignificant of insignificant petty grievances but perhaps the one i am most frustrated by#somehow#'ahhh i play fortnite ahhh i'm having such a time playing fornite' i have nothing but contempt for you.#in the most asshole way possible. after having played a few games. telling ppl u play fortnite is embarrassing.#no matter how u do. u win? congratulations! you just wiped a bunch of 13 yr olds#u lose? congratulations! u just got wiped by a bunch of 13 yr olds and some fuckass who drops $50 weekly to get some fuckass shiny gun#or whatever.#ANYWAYS ...#everyone avert ur eyes im tired and pissed about a variety of things.#croidhe#AND they don't clean up after themselves EITHER. granted not to the extent alyx didn't#and at least they're not a complete asshole. but. did we NOT get you to avoid. this EXACT scenario.
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leonardalphachurch · 2 years
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ε-gamma is so funny. gary is all like, oh i’m going to be gay and evil and torture the alpha again and try to take over the galaxy and fall in love with a man with a mustache and ε-gamma is literally like bro i am just s i am just sitting here
#rvb#this is my ‘gary and alpha were genuinely friends’ propaganda train. epsilon remembered him fondly.#‘what about all the murder’ ‘uhhhhhh it’s okay this one didn’t do that’#the way that ε-sigma is just this nebulous evil thing is also fascinating#like i know it’s bc. elijah wood expensive. but. in canon#he doesn’t talk! and if i will remind that is What Sigma Did. he talked.#but Sigma is not how epsilon remembers sigma. Sigma is not who epsilon introjects.#epsilon introjects The Meta.#obviously nothing like the actual meta. just this terrifying growling concept that epsilon can only understand as ‘the bad man’#i don’t think epsilon could let himself think of what the meta’s actual goals were. could let himself understand that HE is#essentially what the meta wanted to be. he IS the complete meta. in some ways#we KNOW miles understands what the meta actually was. price says it clear as day. the meta wanted to be human.#yet epsilon still presents it to carolina as a bid for power#because i don’t think it’s the meta’s goals epsilon is afraid of. i think it’s its methods#i think it’s epsilon knowing so deeply inside of him. that he could’ve walked that path. to get to her.#everyone seems to know what’s best for texas right? sigma seemed to know what was best for the other ai#and maybe he was right yknow? maybe he was right. isn’t epsilon so much happier now that he remembered the fragments?#was sigma wrong for wanting to gather everyone again? was epsilon wrong for wanting to see her again? were they wrong?#who has to die to prove they weren’t wrong??#oops i. wrote a sad novel in the tags of silly post.
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isekyaaa · 1 year
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Sometimes I think that people make up a male and female character having a "sibling relationship" because deep down they have something against het ships. Like a male and female character can simply exist as friends, but because people really cannot comprehend the fact that friends exist, they immediately tag friends of the same gender as gay and male/female friends being siblings. It's this odd level of insecurity and forcing romance into everything that I just do not understand.
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wavesoutbeingtossed · 4 months
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#warning: rant about parent ahead#I’m so so so so so empathetic to mental health struggles#like exceedingly so#but it’s just so exhausting being on the receiving end of someone’s self-loathing#and to be clear I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT ANYONE HERE#you are all my phone besties and I have so much empathy for your struggles and know that i love you all#and wish i could say the right thing to support you all always and you are always welcome to share whatever is going on#and to quote the bard herself i wish i could take the bombs in your head and disarm them#but when my mother gets into these moods she just seems to use it as a way to get a rise out of us#she’s pulling the ‘well maybe you don’t want to do x with me because it’s not fun because I’m a terrible person and you’re scared of me#and i ruin everything so maybe you would just rather i do everything alone’#and i don’t doubt she feels horrible and i know she has intrusive thoughts etc#but that is so manipulative!!!! she then puts the onus on us to reassure her that she is not!!!! But that is not what she wants!!!!#which we then do profusely and remind her that we do love her and we do do things together and whatever the fuck is the problem of the day#but of course she won’t hear it#so yes it makes us scared of her because we are always worried we’re going to say the wrong thing in a given moment!!!!#i just shut the fuck up at all times now#but my dad tries to use reason with her and of course it just ends in her lashing out and projecting all this shit on him#’oh you maybe you actually hate me maybe you want to leave me’ etc#THEY’VE BEEN MARRIED DECADES HE’S THE MOST LOYAL AND KINDEST PERSON IN THE WORLD HE NEVER ONCE HAS#i honestly don’t know how he lets this roll off his back because i am so fed up with it#It’s just so so so so hard because one minute she’s ‘herself’ and the other she’s this inferno#and we just have to ride whatever wave she’s on and it sucks all the air out of the room#it’s like the one and only time i tried to very gently bring up that something she said was hurtful *after she’d brought it up herself*#she went on a ‘oh I’m a terrible person/terrible parent’ rant and it then turned into me reassuring her that she isn’t#i was just trying to show her how the language/behaviour she uses was hurtful to me#so anyway that was lesson learned that even if she invites it i will never speak of it and luckily she hasn’t since and that was years ago#But it’s just… i know bad thoughts can’t be helped and again i feel so much pain on her behalf for what she struggles with#and i wish i could help but there’s absolutely nothing i can do#AND SHE’S GONE OFF ALL HER MEDS SO THE ONE SOURCE SHE DID HAVE ISN’T THERE ANYMORE EITHER
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