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#but what is the joy in bread when no one eats it?
arteastica · 2 days
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early in the morning, especially when it rains, and a little before noon. (28)
erwin x fem!reader
chapters: (1) | (2) | (3) | (4) | (5) | (6) | (7) | (8) | (9) | (10) | (11) | (12) | (13) | (14) | (15) | (16) | (17) | (18) | (19) | (20) | (21) | (22) | (23) | (24) | (25) | (26) | (27)
summary: I basically took Isayama’s work, forced it into a romance story, and made Erwin the love interest. Commander meets cadet and they fall in love (not instantly though)
notes: very berry canonverse (but some events were modified to fit my narrative), wasn’t intended to be this long, but it all is in the details right?
content warnings: smut where it fits (or where I make it fit. Also, reader is NOT underage, so likewise, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, please.) slow burn (I really mean it. I’m not olympic diving into any form of smut for the first chapters.) no angst. I dislike angst. I would never. I could never. (Although angst can be somewhat subjective so take it with a grain of salt?)
wc: 4.7k
Romance authors often portray dancing with one’s beloved as an endless joy, something that could easily last well beyond nightfall. Yet your throbbing feet, bound and constrained by the white straps of your low-heeled shoes, silently resented them for such a lie. That’s why, when lunch was served, you eagerly welcomed the opportunity to sit down for a moment or two and catch your breath before inevitably dragging him back to the dance floor. After all, when else would you have the chance to slow dance against his chest, your chin resting cozily on his shoulder, and his arm wrapped protectively around your waist?
When you savored the first mouthful of peppercorn stuffing you realized that the Koch’s definition of good food was remarkably similar to yours. Everything, from the velvety gravy soup, the endless procession of assorted biscuits, the indulgent servings of steamed pudding, and the generous dollops of raspberry jam you coronated each of them with, prompted contented hums from your lips whenever you took a bite.
“I don’t recall ever seeing you this happy during a meal, not back at the base at least,” he noted from the seat next to yours, a playful smile on his lips and a forkful of roast venison in his hand.
“Well, that’s because you’ve never actually seen me during a meal. Have you, Commander Smith?” you responded casually, eyes completely focused on the extra dollop of jam you were serving, while your mind wandered to all the times you urged him to put his pen down and join you and the others in the dinner hall, even if just for a piece of bread. “Maybe if you graced us with your presence at dinner from time to time, you would see that I enjoy the Survey Corps’ food just as much. But you insist on eating alone in your office so...” you shrugged nonchalantly before bringing a spoon loaded with pudding to your lips.
“Have I upset you, my lady?” he asked with a smile that denoted he wasn’t the least bit concerned, and then, lifting a napkin, proceeded to wipe red jam off the corner of your lips.
And what an absurd question it was. No one with that shade of blue in their eyes and that disarming smile on their lips could ever upset anyone. There was no possible way, especially not when his face was this close to yours; his caring gesture, as sweet as it was unexpected, completely dazzling you, disorienting your senses until you found yourself nodding dazedly, your own eyes hopelessly lost in his.
“How very rude of me then,” he concluded, softly brushing the cloth against your skin, and you honestly couldn’t tell which was softer: the silk or the back of his fingers.
“Mother!” you exclaimed abruptly, springing up from your chair the moment you discovered her poised frame standing beside you. “We w- I mean I was- how do you do, Mother?”
“Darling,” she sent an acknowledging nod your way. Her usual composure, evident in both her assured demeanor and controlled voice, masked any hint of what she thought or felt, and at the same time, sent your heart into a flurry. Her gaze flickered to the Commander, who rose with practiced ease, a stark contrast to your own fumbling attempt from a few seconds ago.
“Madam,” the Commander offered your mother a warm smile along with a welcoming hand, a silent invitation you desperately hoped she wouldn’t refuse.
“Commander Smith,” she replied after a stretch of silence, which you wished had been shorter, placing her hand in his with ladylike charm.
Although your heart still pounded and raced inside, a flicker of relief found its way within when you saw the genuine smile blooming on your mother’s face as the Commander helped her into the vacant seat beside him.
“Pleasure to finally meet you,” she declared in that regal tone she reserved for social occasions, and it dawned on you: how long it had been since you last heard her speak that way. At home, her voice was always so mellow, less measured, especially around you and your father. And a sting of longing shot through you, a sudden wish for more of those casual evenings shared around the dinner table. “I’ve heard a lot about you, Commander Smith,” she added.
“Not from the press, I expect,” he said, earning a hearty chuckle from your mother. And you lowered your head, trying to resist the childlike smile shyly tugging at your lips as you watched the scene unfold.
“Rest assured, Commander Smith. Despite the occasional critique about the Survey Corp’s overbaked tomato pie, my daughter’s letters are otherwise filled with glowing reports about her days under your leadership.”
“So, Mother! Where’s Father?” you blurted out abruptly as soon as the Commander turned to look at you, a questioning eyebrow raised above a widely amused smirk that spelled ‘I knew you didn’t like our food!’ on his lips. “I was hoping he could meet Commander Smith today.”
“Your father? I was under the impression that he was right behind me,” she sighed in disappointment, glancing around in an attempt to find him among the partygoers. “Guess I shouldn’t have assumed. Maybe one of his… secret society buddies snatched him, or maybe the government finally got him,” she spoke with a touch of nonchalance that made you huff, shaking your head in playful disapproval of your parents’ bickering as you exchanged a smile with the Commander, who seemed downright entertained by your mother’s presence.
“If those bureaucratic buffoons you call ‘our government’ were to find us, color me surprised,” a masculine voice emerged from behind, and you didn’t need to turn in order to know who it belonged to. “Let's just say, Hansel's neck would be on the chopping block way before mine. We can worry about this head above my shoulders after they scrape his off the floor,” with that, your father materialized beside you, snatching a piece of bread from your plate and biting the best part off.
“Father,” you rose to your feet in greeting, gesturing towards the Commander with your hand, “This is Commander Erwin Smith.”
“You bet he is!” he yelled enthusiastically, the bread he had previously shoved into his mouth now getting in the way of his words, so he tried to wash it all down with an indulgent sip of his apple toddy. “What a momentous occasion! Today will go down in history as the day we finally crossed paths, my Commander,” he declared, a wide grin splitting his face.
My Commander? Since when? You thought, a silent snort almost escaping your lips. You wouldn't dare say it aloud though, not wanting to disrupt the moment or make the Commander uncomfortable. You knew time had softened your father's stance on the Survey Corps, especially towards their leader, but it was just too comical: to think this was the same man who, not too many seasons back, used to rant every week about the government wasting their funds on the Scouts.
Regardless, you were glad he had come to see him in a new light. Because Erwin Smith, his people, and the sacrifices they constantly made deserved nothing less than the utmost respect.
“Well met, my lord,” the Commander replied with a cordial smile. Standing right by his side, you blushed at the height difference between you two. There were moments when you felt genuinely small next to him, and this was one of them, but it always brought you a strange sense of security. And suddenly, you found yourself longing to experience that comforting feeling again, to be held in his strong embrace once again today, like the first time, that late summer afternoon in the forest of Giants Trees… To feel even smaller and overpowered by him, his solid muscles, his manly scent... Yes, that would be the perfect ending to a truly fantastic day.
“I have heard a great deal about you from your lady daughter,” he added, his eyes crinkling at the corners with genuine warmth. “She even mentioned your... unique ability to interpret nature's signs.”
“Is that right?” your father turned to you, pride shining in his round eyes. “Do you know what wisdom Augusta’s azaleas are revealing today?”
“Unfortunately, my lord, I wouldn’t be able to interpret such… botanical pronouncements,” the Commander replied with a hint of amusement in his voice. You weren’t surprised by his skepticism. By now, you had made peace with the fact that a man of science like him would, most likely, always remain in disbelief, no matter how many times nature proved you or your father’s predictions right.
A hearty laugh erupted from your father. "Ah, but perhaps they whisper of blossoming relationships today! Maybe even lifelong bonds taking root, huh? Wouldn’t you want to know, my Commander?" he winked at you, causing you to immediately duck your head in an attempt to hide the kaleidoscope of reds your face had become.
The things he says! Since when did he even-
You took a deep breath, exasperation and affection wrestling within your chest. Classic Father, you thought, always saying what’s on his mind, even if his comments leave everyone a little flustered. You mentally made a note to apologize to the Commander for not warning him about this side of your fa-
“Lifelong bonds. An interesting interpretation, sir,” you looked up, his blue eyes choosing to share a moment with yours even though his words were aimed at your father. “They are a treasure worth cherishing, indeed,” he said, warmth blooming in your chest the longer his gaze lingered on you. And… was that longing in his eyes?
Was he thinking about those days too?
We used to spend hours collecting wildflowers by the stream near our cabin, drinking fresh lemonade in the summer, making love with the bedroom door ajar and the rainiest of mornings ahead of us…You reminded him in silence, surprised by the sudden urge to share with him the memories of your future together. And you swore you saw a ghost of a smile touch his lips before he chose to replace it with words.
“Perhaps some things are best discovered through experience, rather than foretold.”
His words hung in the air, heavy with unspoken meaning, tightening your throat with bittersweet nostalgia, and blurring your vision with vivid pictures of memories you were yet to create. Blinking back potential tears, you looked away, a blush creeping up your neck as you realized it was probably your turn to respond. So, taking a deep breath, you hid your longing with a smile.
"Perhaps they are, Commander Smith," you whispered, your voice barely audible amidst the backdrop of laughter surrounding you.
“Are you enjoying the reception, sir?” The Commander asked, and you knew him well enough to recognize this as his way of diverting attention from you, giving you space to steady yourself.
“Greatly,” your father replied, taking a hearty gulp of his drink to freshen up his throat. “And now that they've started serving apple toddies, this whole thing’s gotten a lot better! Ha ha! Although, to tell you the truth, the food can’t hold a candle to my wife’s cooking,” he added, trying to appear unassuming as he swirled the amber liquid thoughtfully, and you could vividly picture the discreet eye-roll your mother had answered him with. “Her green tomato pie is absolutely heavenly… Tell you what, Commander?!” he suddenly looked up, a mischievous glint appearing in his face, and while you didn’t know exactly what idea had crossed his mind, you certainly recognized the sparkle it had ignited in his eyes. “How about I show you my sincere appreciation with a proper dinner? Consider it a thank you for looking after our precious daughter.”
Your heart skipped a beat, hammering completely off rhythm against your ribs, the butterflies in your stomach swirling uncontrollably, creating a wave of nervous excitement that destructively washed over you. Surely, he couldn't be suggesting...
“I’m sure you’re a busy man, but I also know you are a highly intelligent one, which makes me think you have already assessed the situation, and identified this as probably the only opportunity you’ll have to enjoy my wife’s phenomenal cooking. In the nearby future, at least,” your father declared, leaning forward, his proposal making your stomach clench tighter.
Your gaze flickered to the Commander. He was about to respond to your father, but paused to steal a glance at you, a silent question exchanged between your eyes, unspoken… yes, but you believed you understood.
"Father, that's not necessary! Commander Smith is much too busy—" you blurted out, the memory of the Commander’s dismissal of Angelika Wald’s invitation still fresh in your mind. And you weren’t brave enough to risk facing the same rejection. “He has a long journey back to the base and… needs to leave shortly after the reception.”
“Is that so?” your father asked crestfallen, his shoulders slumping slightly as he turned to the Commander, and you had to admit he wasn’t the only one feeling dejected over the situation. Even though it may seem you were a little too eager to discourage the dinner, in truth, you were just doing your job, making it easier for the Commander to decline unnecessary appointments.
“My duties require a swift return to the base indeed,” he interjected, his words awakening a dormant discomfort in your chest, a faint ache you felt guilty for even having. Of course, he had responsibilities waiting, a mountain of paperwork and a whole base relying on him, to be more precise. Not only that, but he had already generously given you Sunday free, insisting you spent the entire weekend with your family. What else could you ask of him? Nothing. Doing so would be selfish, an indulgence you couldn’t justify.
“But perhaps…” he added unexpectedly, leaving you momentarily breathless, “Perhaps I could manage to find a way to fulfill both my obligations and experience your wife’s legendary cooking?”
Your chest rose and fell in rapid motions, trying to keep up with the beating of your heart, which had been hammering a frantic rhythm against your ribs just moments ago, and now soared with a lightness you had only felt when you were together with him… secluded in your imaginary cabin in the woods.
“Only if it wouldn’t be an inconvenience for her, of course,” the Commander clarified, gesturing towards your mother. “I wouldn't want to impose on your hospitality, sir, madam."
A radiant smile bloomed on your face, threatening to split your cheeks in two, as the weight of your earlier anxieties now seemed to melt away slowly, getting gradually replaced by a giddy anticipation that bubbled up exactly like the fizzy contents of the bottle you knew your father would pop open for dinner tonight. And you couldn't help but steal a glance back at the Commander, the warm smile he gave you in return held a knowing glint, a silent confirmation of your suspicions: He knew exactly how happy he was making you. And suddenly, although still a little guilty, you felt the uncontrollable need to hold his face in both hands and kiss him. Yet the image of what your mother would do following such events, quickly destroyed that notion.
“Nonsense. Allow us to treat you to the relaxed evening a hardworking gentleman like you deserves every now and then. Right, pumpkin?” your father said, turning to your mother for confirmation.
“Consider yourself most welcome this evening, Commander Smith,” she replied promptly, a subtle smile gracing her lips, and an inviting warmth unfolding in her voice, both very reminiscent of home. And you hoped the Commander could feel it too, you hoped he could understand: Just how welcome he was.
“Lovely! We shall expect you at the entrance within the hour, my Commander,” your father concluded, his voice filled with genuine enthusiasm. “Until then, please enjoy the remainder of the festivities.”
With that, he walked away with your mother for a final indulgence in refined mingling. As you watched their backs blend into the crowd, a soft smile played on your lips, cherishing the heartfelt kindness they had enveloped the Commander with. Maybe he needed it, maybe not, but you definitely wanted him to have it.
“So…” he leaned in to whisper in your ear once your parents were out of sight, a playful smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “We overbake our pies…”
“I never said that,” you countered with a hint of innocence, meeting his gaze with the unwavering confidence typical of someone who has no secrets to hide. Although a mischievous grin betrayed your amusement. “I called it ‘enthusiastic baking.’ Mother may have taken some creative liberties with her interpretation,” you added, wrapping several biscuits in a cloth napkin for the carriage ride home.
-
“Surely, my Commander, the situation is as clear as day," your father's booming voice resonated from the tearoom at the other end of the hallway. Even if by the time it reached the kitchen, it had softened to a murmur, neither you nor your mother needed to understand the exact words in order to know what he was talking about. The sheer excitement in his tone was a dead giveaway. "The true power lies with a hidden hand, content to manipulate a puppet king while they themselves remain hidden in the shadows. Their motives you ask? One can only speculate.”
The conversation, which at this point risked becoming your father’s monologue, sharpened as you neared the end of the hallway, the crinkling of porcelain against your fingertips accompanying the sound of your heels against the floorboards.
“However, unlike that old gossip Hansel," your father chuckled, a hint of disagreement lacing his tone, "I believe the answer lies in preservation."
“If the public, or some foreign power were to set their sights on this so-called king…” your father continued, his voice dropping to a dramatic whisper.
“The true royal family, whoever they may be, could remain untouched, veiled in secrecy and free to continue their reign… from the shadows,” the Commander interjected, and you arrived just in time to see a flicker of genuine curiosity cross his face. “I see your point, sir, a most intriguing notion indeed. This 'so-called king' would serve as a convenient buffer, deflecting any public discontent or potential threats aimed at the true power behind the throne.”
The Commander, you knew, had a liking for devouring dusty tomes on royal history. Did he, perhaps, find amusement in the conspiratorial air of the conversation? Or was there a spark of something deeper behind his words, a thirst for uncovering the truth about the hidden hand your father, and his own late father perhaps, believed controlled the Walls?
“Precisely, Erwin. I may call you by your given name, right?” Your father checked again, his question painting your cheeks warm shades of red. At some point between Lord Koch’s front door and your own, the Commander had been promoted from ‘my Commander’ to just ‘Erwin’, as if sharing a carriage ride automatically granted your father the right to address him by his first name.
As you placed the silver tray on the small table in front of them, you stole a glance at the Commander, curious to see his reaction, which came in the form of a smile, quietly playing at the corner of his lips as he inclined his head slightly, a silent acknowledgment of your father's request.
“It’s a solid theory, wouldn’t you say?” the mischievous glint in your father's eyes hinted at a newfound understanding between them, perhaps forged over their shared interest in royal intrigue rather than whatever gratitude your father claimed he held towards the Commander for saving your life in the Forest of Giant Trees. “Now, here’s where Hansel and I disagree,” he continued, leaning forward in his chair with a conspiratorial air. “He thinks it's all about keeping information locked away, some dark secret they desperately want hidden,” he paused, clearly for effect, his gaze flickering around the room as if checking for eavesdroppers.
“A dark secret, sir?”
Your father nodded, leaning in even closer, his voice now a low rumble. “Hansel believes it’s about manipulating the very fabric of history itself. Imagine," he said, his eyes widening with a dark intensity, "rewriting the past to suit their needs, erasing any trace of their true origins or some terrible deed they committed."
He leaned back again, a satisfied grin spreading across his face. “Think about it. Controlling the past is the ultimate power, wouldn't you agree, Erwin? By messing with the records, they control what everyone knows, they keep people blind to the truth, forever dancing to their tune. Thank you, buttercup,” your father said when you added two cubes of sugar to his tea. You mockingly mouthed a silent ‘buttercup’ at the Commander across the table, who tried to hide an amused chuckle behind a raised teacup.
Despite his apparent amusement, however, you recognized the struggle flickering behind his eyes. Concern, perhaps. After all, royal calumny was supposed to have claimed the lives of many, including his own father. Or was it an even heavier burden? A reminder of all the unanswered questions he had voluntarily inherited from him, those haunting mysteries he had vowed to unravel on his behalf.
“Aren’t my daughter’s pastries fantastic?” your father boomed, switching the mood with a hearty laugh. “I think the Survey Corps kitchen could’ve used her talents more than your squad, wouldn't you agree, my Commander?” he joked, a proud smile splitting his face as he dunked the corner of a freshly-baked biscuit in his tea, “no dangerous expeditions for her, just pastries and biscuits for everyone at the headquarters. A win-win situation for each one of your soldiers, wouldn’t you say?”
The Commander dipped his head slightly, a barely perceptible smile gracing his lips for a fleeting moment before it vanished. He took a measured sip of his tea, his eyes locking with yours across the table before he murmured, in a voice so low it brushed only your ears, “Everyone except for one.”
A faint smile, almost imperceptible, tugged at the corner of your lips. Two. You answered in your head, a conversation flickering between the two of you without a single word spoken.
It was a secret message only he could decipher, similarly to how the hint of affection now hidden in his gaze was something only you could see. This was your secret language, born from shared peril on the field, one you had perfected through stolen glances, clandestine touches, and secretive moments like this.
“Goodness! I should invite Erwin more often!” your father jumped excitedly, his eyes widening at the sight of the overflowing platter your mother brought in. “I'd ask what the occasion is for all this hospitality, but it’s not every Saturday we have the Survey Corps commander over for dinner, is it?”
You chuckled as you carefully arranged the small pies your mother had brought on individual saucers, each one holding their very own miniature piece of sunshine: the vibrant yellow slice of tomato you had placed on top.
"Don't forget your vegetables, everyone," you teased, placing a dainty silver fork beside each pie.
Though they weren't exactly an everyday treat, tomato pies were a familiar comfort you enjoyed quite often. They were simple, nourishing, not particularly difficult to make, and your mother could practically whip them up in her sleep. Today, however, you understood your father’s surprise. His favorite treat was still familiar in taste, yet transformed in appearance, which you had taken special care with this afternoon, an unusual twist meant to be a delightful surprise for the Commander.
"These look fantastic, Madam," he remarked, taking the plate your mother was offering.
"All credit goes to her," she replied, her hand gesturing your way.
You met his gaze in the middle of the tearoom, another silent exchange passing between you as your lips offered him a small, furtive smile in return.
"A delectable surprise, indeed," the Commander said, a smile crinkling the corners of his eyes before they returned to the pastry, his gaze leaving a lingering warmth on your skin as some sort of ‘thank you’ note, perhaps. And then, when he took a bite of the buttery, brandy-infused crust, and the taste made those same lines beside his eyes deepen, a quiet yearning started to bloom within your chest.
Here, in your parent’s tearoom, bathed in the gentle afternoon sunlight and the comforting scent of baking, he seemed a world away from the horrors he faced daily. This was the kind of life he deserved, wasn't it? Quiet, comfortable, a far cry from battles with flesh-eating giants and the mangled pile of bodies they left behind. An afternoon tea with a nice conversation, and a plate of perfectly golden, tomato-topped pies – these were the simple pleasures he rarely, if ever, experienced.
As you watched him savor the pie in quiet appreciation, a sting of possessiveness, sharp and unexpected, twisted in your gut, as you found yourself desperately wishing that you could be the one to create these peaceful moments for him, not just this once, but for a lifetime.
"Sir, Madam," he began suddenly, bringing you back from the sea of thought you drifted to ever so often, "your daughter has a real talent for making the simple appear..." He paused, letting his deep, husky voice please not only your ears, but a secret, sensitive path down your body—a path that, though hidden beneath your dress at the moment, he happened to know very well "...utterly delightful."
The steam escaping from the teapot wasn’t a match for the eager summer now burning between your legs; his lips, as well as the smirk tugging at them, acting as a delicious reminder, both tempting and frustrating, of a desire you couldn't indulge, not while your parents were present at least.
"Thank you, Commander," You answered, your eyes still indulging in the sweet curve of his bottom lip, “but it's truly not difficult when the produce is this beautiful," you said, gesturing towards the vibrant yellow decoration atop the pie. And it was true. The Lemon Blush were a gentle variety. Sweet, sunshine-colored things, their bottoms blushed in lovely sunset pink. “Truly a pleasure to work with," you finished, your smiling lips tainted with a bit of mischief that betrayed you weren’t referring to the fruit exclusively.
A soft chuckle escaped his in response. Like honey on a summer afternoon, you loved the way it lingered in the air: the sound of his laughter, a sweet reminder that beautiful things still existed, a melody you always replayed in your head, long after it was gone.
Still wearing the same smile on your lips, you settled beside your mother, whose vigilant eyes you suddenly became very aware of, and when you turned to face her, you were not met with her characteristic warmth, but with the unreadable mask she now wore over her features. Your entire face started to mirror the blush of the tomatoes themselves upon realizing she had been watching you intently, it was unclear how long, but it was certainly long enough to make your joyful demeanor falter, your smile vanishing as quickly as it had appeared.
Luckily for you though, your father, always blissfully immune to any type of awkward tension, unknowingly came to your aid with a hearty chuckle. "Don't let her fool you, Erwin. Most nights, it's a way simpler fare in this household."
You flashed him a playful glare, his intervention momentarily making you forget about the weight settling within you.
“Seems ages since my darling daughter graced us with her culinary flair. Last winter, wasn’t it? Can you believe it? Ha! How long must a poor old man wait for his sweet buttercup to spoil him again!” your father continued, a touch of mock-hurt in his voice, and your eyes involuntarily rolled at his words.
“Admittedly, it was a special occasion back then too,” he conceded, his voice adopting that pretentious tone he reserved for embellishing stories, for making them grander than reality. The playful glint in his eyes gave away the exaggerated version of whatever tale he was about to tell, even though his lips were yet to utter a single word. “Hansel’s nephew, a fine young lord, came to formally request my daughter’s hand in marriage,” he finished with a conceited smile, his mouth blissfully stuffed with cake and a large crumb clinging to his beard, sweetly oblivious to the way his words had dragged your heart to the very pits of your stomach.
-
buy me a ko-fi☕️? ^^
taglist: @mysticalnightbeliever @aliasrising @elnyrae @mchlist @apts2000 @angelaevangelion @depitaangeline @ynackerman9499 @afatalheat @pumpkin-toffee @velouria17 @gassytritis @goddessinsweats @nube55 @jeanboyjean @crazychaoticizzy @braunsbabe @erwinawesomeness @lucifers-nipple-piercing @karmabyfernando @thicc101q @shittyprofilebutfuckit @dilfenthusiast-union
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lostlegendaerie · 4 months
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Sunday blues under the cut
I'm going through my Google docs and my favorite (recs) AO3 bookmarks and like. there's something about the nostalgia here that's making me really sad for some reason and maybe it's because I've been so much less engaged with fandom stuff since I left Twitter.
Like I still read constantly and comment when I can, but maybe it's because of the culture that tends to softly discourage reblogs with comments (as opposed to Twitters endless streams of little public discussions, at least back in like 2019-2021) that I feel extremely disconnected.
I've got my little pockets of two or three friends here and there but a group? A fandom? A place where I felt like part of a community of likeminded people?
I don't know. I think I'm just back on that same old "I want to write something that matters to to someone" train and the only thing I've written with that level of plot and teeth is the fucking Genshin fic and I'm just. I wish I didn't care so much about making friends! I wish I didn't have to fight so hard to feel like I belonged! But Katsucon put into sharp relief that I don't have nearly the amount of IRL support that I need to be okay. I'm the mom friend to 80% of the people I know, and the other 3 individuals cannot be expected to keep helping me out of every crisis I have.
I don't know what happened to me in the past few years. I know some things have gotten better. But I miss so, so much just having a group of people to get EXCITED about creative projects with - or even just being able to hang out in person and not worry about how many annoying stupid things I've done in the past hour. God. GOD.
I know that I'm still talented. There's still something worth keeping in this body. But I feel like I've lost my ability to showcase it or share it in a way that isn't just Laurel (whom I love) doggedly trying to keep my sense of worth above water.
The only thing I feel like people like me for is my credit card. And it's something. It helps the people I love. But. God, I wish I could be something else.
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yume-fanfare · 1 year
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the sandwich post just has me wondering what kind of bread u guys eat
#i have bread opinions#because see. um.#here the word 'sandwich' is only used to describe the ones that r made with sliced bread#like → 🥪 this one i guess?#the ones made with . more baguette-like bread are called 'bocadillos' n they're like. idk the Good and filling ones#the ones in pokemon scarlet and violet are Bocadillos#like that game mechanic is so real its existence fills me with joy#so like that kind of bread is usually good by itself it's not dry even if you don't add oil or butter or anything to it#unless it's like. whole wheat bread. that one is often dry there are few that aren't#but then again im not exactly talking about baguette bread .#at least the one that's sold as specifically baguette here and the french one that i remember is. a bit too thin to add filing to it?#and here it goes stale within like a DAY#of course bread is best eaten fresh but it's nicer if it lasts just a little bit longer.....#i get that lasting longer is kinda the appeal of sandwich bread#and also the fact that it's pre-sliced but it's not the kind you eat when you want Good bread#(i live in humidity land)#anyways. where was i going with this.#ah right yeah the bread here is usually at least a little wider than traditional french baguettes (?)#but in the end the technique and outcome of the crust and such depends on the bakery and#yeah i don't know what else i wanted to say mitsuru moment over#i love bread#mar's midnight rambles#additional disclaimer i actually still don't know how to make sandwiches in pokemon violet
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evilminji · 1 month
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You knooooowwww... >.>
The only difference, technically, between a school in the Zone? And on Earth? Is the American government won't recognize your Zone diploma...
Not accredited. But like..... I'm JUST SAYING? If you didn't try to pass your school off as some Big Ivy League type? Pulled the "oh yeah, you'd never have heard of it, it's local." And the COMPUTERS say it's legit?
How many people will dig deeper?
If you legitimately have the knowledge, you legitimately have the knowledge. Not YOUR fault you left out the whole "extra-dimensional" part. It makes folk nervous! And nervous folks get stabby.
So like? If you were ALREADY planning to "Move" as you euphemistically put it? Talked it over with your VERY concerned folks and friends? Who do NOT like the look of the steady but concerning rise of Anti-Ghost Powers That Be? Who finally put their foot down and reminded you that you are a TEENAGER and it's NOT your responsibility to fix the world?
Well...
Fuck those guys, I guess. You'll miss the old house, but Team "Taking our ball and going literally anywhere else" makes some good points. Why ARE you putting up with this?
And honestly, you've never SEEN your dad have so much fun. Him and the Reality Realtor just sorta... Vibe. Himbo to Himbo communications. Smatters of advanced physics. Fudge. It's great.
They move the portal. Collapse the old one in a way that makes it impossible to recover or recreate. You... kinda don't want to ask. They had that "mad scientist glint" in their eyes.
And while everyone's checking out brochures to different realities? You? Head off to the nearest College. It's the Zone, so technically you could go to any of endless billions. But you'd like your education some time this century.
Cue! Danny Fenton! Entering?
Academia's wet dream. A sprawling CITY of a college. Where the classes are on EVERYTHING and the price is FREE. People have Obsessions okay?? They NEED to teach. Debate and discuss! Study! Right papers and read them! It's been going on a while! And what happens when you find a subject that's NOT covered?
YOU COVER IT!
It's like if New York was a College. Good fucking luck find the dorms. Sleep on the floor like the rest of us, you casual.
Danny was Not Prepared ™.
He loves it though.
Classes on aeronautics next making the perfect sandwich, shoved next to historical basketry, stacked above alien slam poetry. But only on Tuesdays! Ever shifting. Breaking his Fenton Born Adhd in to a fine PASTE to be smeared upon bread. Happy mental stimulation chemicals go Brrrrrrrr
If it wasn't wildly inappropriate, he would LICK IT to claim it as his then wrap around it and gaurd like a territorial cat. He thought he HATED school! Turns out he just hated high-school. College though? College, or at least ZONE College, is fuckin AWESOME.
He's sit in SO MANY random classes just cause.
Picked up and dropped them at a whim. When they no longer sparked joy. He's been a flighty bitch and for once? No one CARES. No one says "you HAVE to commit and stick with this FOREVER once you choose this" and? It just? It's so FREEING! He's learned so MUCH!
He's probably gonna come back!
Which? Is how a deeply, DEEPLY weird aerospace engineer from supposedly bumfuck NOWHERE, end up working at Wayne Industries. He's.... a lil crazy behind the eyes. Ha ha... CONCERNING ™!
Dude sleeps on the lab floor. Has weirdly spotty knowledge. Can be an unprecedented genius one second and not know who the current president is the next. Doesn't know what DAY it is. Forgets to eat. Tried to make a fusion reactor out of the break room toaster before Sandra from accounting distracted him with pictures of her cat.
It's like he wanders through life blissfully unaware that he is both terrifying and about three seconds from killing them all. Then FUCKING TRIPS because he forgot to tie his shoelaces again.
Who hired this man?
WHY!?
I mean, we KNOW why. Probably to put him on a watch list. But? He's like a terrifying murder puppy! Built like a tank! That's stoned out of its mind half the time. And have you HEARD his college stories? That CAN'T be legal. Was this guy raised in a cult!? Aaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!????
@hdgnj @legitimatesatanspawn @babbling-babull @dcxdpdabbles @hypewinter
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southislandwren · 2 years
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uhh so basically i love my club i love my friends. the darkness has been staved off for another day
#we had SO much fun and i did a great job with the social media so i feel really good rn :)#im full of good food and i had a blast bonding with some freshmen and one of my already good friends#diary post#also talked someone out of suicide on yik yak like 5 minutes ago so like.... lol#idk how successful i was but i at least got him to postpone until monday#told him to dm me if he needed to talk. i can ESA for this dude bc i know exactly what hes going through#he used the same language i was using march 2021. like i can relive those emotions in an instant#like youre so right god IS telling me to come home. and wouldnt it feel soooo good to just go home#but also. how will you watch the sunrises and see the snow glittering in the sunlight. how will you eat good food#how will you feel the warmth from tea spreading through your body. how will you pet a soft kitty and feel it purr against your hand.#how will you feel pride at accomplishing something and feel the joy of sunlight against your skin.#god is calling us home yeah. that comes with the brain chemistry. but you have to say NO i want to stay out and play a little longer#sam went home early but i still have things i want to do and when im ready to go home he will be waiting for me#for now though. i will think about my family waiting for me and i will say sorry. but i'm going to play until i'm good and tired.#lol that was not where this post was originally going but like. shit happens i guess lmao#idk man i'm still in a good mood! might slam out the rest of this essay than go to bed#im like 80% finished. maybe 85% idk. but i'm getting close <3#then tomorrow i have my management paper and do the dishes and do laundry and cook pasta for mon and tues#probably clean my house#and ALSO have to make 2 loaves of banana bread for club meeting tomorrow#banana bread is my specialty i can make a mean loaf. so for our 'substitution' activitiy im making 1 loaf with eggs#and 1 loaf with banana instead of egg. ive done it before and it comes out pretty well#and someone else is making brownies and one of my dear friends is making a savory thing too#then the club activities are the food. opening a gift box from a different schools corresponding club. and that might be it but i forget#ANYWAY okay im going to finish off this post. i got things to do
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sageyxbabey · 13 days
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Hospital Food | COD x Reader
MDNI
Summary: Your ex-husband (the biological father of your daughter) shows up when said daughter is admitted to hospital. Your current partner (and your daughter) put him in his place.
aka: stupid man gets verbally wrecked by a 17-year-old girl and a SAS soldier. Inspired by the time my stepdad and i roasted my bio dad.
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For @the-californicationist 's Nameless Challenge! This means you have to guess which of the delicious war criminals I'm writing about below. (This has inspired a series, so you'll find out who I was thinking of when the second one comes out. ;) )
WC: ~700 words (oops, forgive me cali)
Pairing: f!reader x tf141 member (but who? 👀)
Your ex-husband stood at the foot of his biological daughter’s hospital bed, watching her tap salt out of the little sachet onto a piece of buttered bread. His face was full of condescension, and you knew yours was full of barely contained disgust as you stared at him. God damn the child support agreement that required you to tell him when she was admitted to a hospital. At least you had otherwise full custody of her, you’re sure your ex would’ve been murdered by now if you’d been forced to see him semi-regularly – either by you or your wonderful (deadly, military-trained) partner who hated the man in front of you almost as much as you did.
God, you wish he was here right now. Unfortunately, he was wonderful enough to have gone down to the cafeteria in search of lunch for the both of you – and something sweet to sneak back in for your little girl. He spoiled her rotten, and it made you love him more every time he did. 
“That’s a lot of salt,” your ex rumbled. If looks could kill, the stare your 17-year-old daughter levelled him with would’ve evaporated him where he stood.
“Yes. It is,” she spoke. 
Tap tap tap, she resumed shaking the sachet.
“They put salt in bread when they make it. White bread is about 3% salt,” he said. As if there was some important point your daughter was missing.
“I know. I’ve made bread before.”
Tap tap tap.
It was taking every fibre of your being not to laugh with sheer joy and vindication as your daughter, the blood of your ex-husband, so casually eviscerated him in the middle of this tiny white room.
“Which is to say, you don’t need to be adding salt to it.” You didn’t think the man could sound any whinier. You were about to step in, but your daughter let out a deep sigh beyond her years (definitely picked up from the soldier who shared your home) and threw the empty salt packet onto the bed tray.
“Tell me, why shouldn’t I eat that much salt?” Her arms crossed in front of her, your ex-husband looked to you for help. He would get none.
“Because… it makes your body retain fluid and raises blood pressure–”
“Correct. I am in this hospital because I have low blood pressure caused by a low volume of fluid in my blood. They give me the salt packet on purpose. I am prescribed literal salt tablets,” she shook the bottle in the man’s face, “because I need to raise my blood pressure up to normal levels.”
Silence. Blinking.
“So I am going to eat this bread because it is what the doctor ordered.” Her head snapped to you, with a chaotic glint in her eye only teenage girls could possess. The next words out of her mouth would stay with you until your dying breath;
“Hey, Mum. When’s Dad coming back?”
You could not fight the grin that spread across your face, the elation jumping in your stomach. A quick glance at your ex-husband’s sour face made it clear that your daughter’s point had struck true – You are not welcome here. I do not need you. I have a real father where you failed.
You opened your mouth to reply, “He’s–”
“Right here, love!” The warm, gravelly voice of your partner filled the room, your daughter’s eyes lighting up with his presence. He stopped to press a tender kiss against your cheek, passing you a toasted sandwich, before he made his way to stand over the shoulder of your precious daughter.
“And I got you something special,” he whispered playfully, “Don’t tell the nurse.” He pulled a poppy seed muffin out of the bag he was holding and placed it on the bed tray in front of her. 
“Sorry mate, who are you?” Your partner turned and cocked his head at your ex. 
Your man knew exactly who the snivelling creature across from him was. Your boyfriend was just deciding to be a little shit, and it was one of the sexiest things you’d ever seen him do. 
“Dad, this is Marcus. You know, the man who got Mum pregnant with me?” Your daughter’s voice was poorly disguised venom. 
“Oh, right! Of course. I suppose I should thank you for your part in creating my wonderful daughter.” He stretched a hand out to your ex-husband who, for once in his life, made the smart choice to shake it and give some poor excuse for why he was needed elsewhere.
As soon as he was out the door, you had your arms around your lover, pressing endless kisses to his cheek as your daughter laughed. 
“Did you hear what I said, Dad?” 
Your partner leaned down to hug the girl – his girl – tightly. He grinned.
“Every fucking word.”
----------
I LOVE MY STEPDAD SO MUCH HE'S MY REAL DAD and my mother and he are truly couple goals. I was on the phone with him the other day when I asked if he remembered this happening. he let out the most fatherly cackle of pure, shit-stirring joy I've ever heard. It was magnificent.
forgot the TAGLIST: @frogtowne @teenagellamaangel @universitypenguin
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wndasdoll · 2 months
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࿔‧ ֶָ֢˚˖𐦍˖˚ֶָ֢ ‧࿔
living a farmer's life with wanda
𐙚 wanda would start off every morning by brushing your hair. then you'd go off and feed your little bunnies.
𐙚 you were so adorable, the best part of wanda's morning was seeing how much joy your little pets brought to you.
𐙚 another thing which brought wanda joy was going flower picking with you. she'd dress the two of you in sundresses, braid your hair and put bows in them. god you looked so cute like that.
𐙚 the way your eyes would perk up when she found your favorite blue flower. or how'd you close your eyes, bring the flowers to your nose and just take in it's scent.
𐙚 one particular morning, wanda woke you up with blueberry pancakes, which was also your favorite. you woke up to her mixing the pancake batter.
𐙚 you were so darn sleepy, practically balling your fists towards your eyes. "ah. ah. ah." wanda shook her head, putting the bowl with mix down. she gently grabbed your hands and hummed softly.
𐙚 you took this as a sign to koala bear wrap yourself over her. she let out a quiet chuckle and brought her lips towards your forehead.
𐙚 which is what led you to your current situation. wanda had gone to the market and your tummy started to growl. wanda left you a note while you were asleep, saying she'd headed to the market because you were out of bread.
𐙚 you were not at all a good chef like wanda was. covered in flour from when the bag exploded on you and not knowing wanda's recipe, you were doomed from the start.
𐙚 the door knob rattled. oh no, wanda was home. she couldn't see you like this, you ran to your shared bedroom.
𐙚 'babydoll?" wanda spoke, her eyes scanning the room for you. she left the grocerys down by the door and her eyes met the mess you left in the kitchen. ah, now she sees what happened.
𐙚 she follows your flour footprints which led to the bedroom. "hey bunny, i'm back. are you hungry? did mommy forget to make you food before she left?" wanda tried to coax you out of the room.
𐙚 you sighed, opening the door. "oh baby... want mama to help you get cleaned up then fix you a bite to eat? does that sound good, my sweet girl?" wanda cooed, bringing a thumb up to your cheek. It swiped the layer of flour left on your cheek.
wanda's masterlist
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ladyelissarose · 1 year
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Can you do like Hobie smut, your writing is GOOD.
Let it be a jealousy kinda thing I haven't seen much of Hobie being jealous
‘I’ll Show You Jealous’
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Hobie Brown aka Spider-Punk x female spider-woman reader. (he calls her ‘webs’)
Trope; best friends to lovers
Warnings; 18+ Smut! NSFW. Jealous sex, it starts quite rough then ends soft. Hobie being Hobie- but jealous ;) slight fingering.. mostly smut y’all .
Summary: Being best friends shouldn’t have any feelings in between right? Especially jealousy when Hobie thinks your hanging around too close to a certain Spider-Man? What does it take for him to come to terms on how he ‘really’ feels?
Authors note; My favorite anon!! I’m sorry it took me a few days to get this out, but I’m glad to say it’s all yours now! I hope you like it, I’ve never written for Hobie before!! Enjoy love!!🫶🏼🌻
“You see? That’s why I think you’re one of the funniest! You’re hilarious and you get my humor!”
An effortless chuckle left your lips as your hand slipped off of Ben Riley’s back, where it had been first when you patted it.
You two had just come back from a short mission, which was as per usual… putting an anomaly where it belonged, and making sure canon took place as it should. Hobie stood in the distance watching you both communicate so freely and happily, like if you had been best friends, like you were with Hobie. I mean, that’s all you too should of been.. best friends.
But in the pit of his stomach and behind his tough and sarcastic behavior about not liking commitment, all he wanted to do was commit his life to you, and make you more than his ‘best friend’. The only thing was.. he didn’t know how to tell or show you. So painfully he witnessed you give away your laughter and touch to someone else, if not others that weren’t him. So to avoid staring at this heartbreak, he went back to his universe.
Soon you had let Ben go and looked for the one that made you smile the biggest, warm your heart, and give you a certainty of safety and care no matter what crazy shit you two did. But, he was no where to be seen. A frown made it to your lips after you had checked everywhere, you even went up to Miguel’s lair to check if Hobie wasn’t lurking around and stealing his lunch- and yet, he wasn’t there. You sat for a minute and thought that maybe he went home, but… he always waited for you to come back from a mission, so you could eat together and go on a short ‘joy swinging’ across the universes.
Hoping you’d find him at his universe, you clicked on your gizmo and went to his place, falling in love with the aesthetic of it all as you arrived, and it reminding you of every detail about Hobie too. You swung around his home- he wasn’t there. At his favorite hideout clubhouse- he wasn’t there. Even stopped by the stand where he usually took a sweet bread or two without being seen- he wasn’t in sight. Finally stopping to take a break, you thought for a few seconds before it clicked for you.
“What the hell… where could you- oh! I know.”
What concerned you though about the place where he could possibly be, was the fact that you told each other that you’d go there if something was wrong or ‘a talk’ needed to happen, meaning it was very serious.
Upon arriving to the tallest skyscraper in your universe, you let out a sigh of relief as you found him there, playing a soft tune on his guitar.
You walked slowly towards him, knowing he’d feel your presence, as his spider senses would tell him immediately. You slid off your mask as you called out,
“Hobie?-“
Hobie’s shoulders tensed as he muttered immediately,
“Jus’ leave me be… please?”
Worry but you as you heard him, his slightly broken voice,
He’s never told you to leave him alone, instead the opposite, always subtly begging you to be around his presence, whether it was him lurking around with your favorite snack, or playing your favorite songs on his guitar. Hobie was smart, he found out ways to keep you around that didn’t include him actually telling or asking you to be… and so far it has worked like magic.
It was your smile that had him loosening up, the little squeals you let out when Mayday was being extra adorable, puppy eyes at the sight of kittens or his favorite of all time, your mere presence that gave him motive to fall for you.
With you he felt free and safe, he knew he’d give up an entire universe if that meant he could be with you. But lately as you’ve been given more privileges, you’ve been a little too absent for his liking, and he didn’t appreciate how you were hanging around Miguel and Ben Riley more than him.
Trust was something you too have built quite strongly sense the start of your friendship, and he should’ve confided in that trust and believe that you haven’t ghosted him for someone else… yet here he was… sadly plucking on his guitar strings to your favorite tune- ‘Vigilante Shit’… thinking that maybe you have.. but here you are. Speaking out to him as if you were desperate for him.
“Hobie please, I can help-“
“How’d you know I’d be here?”
With a scoff you recalled your guys’ words,
“We said we’d come here for something important.. and today I couldn’t find you anywhere.. so I thought this would be the place.. and here you are. So, what’s wrong Hobie?”
He then stood up and mumbled to himself,
“It’s nothing, I shouldn’t of come.”
Your spider senses heard him clearly tho, so before he was about to walk off you genuinely said,
“Hobie.. you know I’m here for you. Regardless of what it is.”
Hobie turned to you and walked close, watching how you didn’t walk back but stayed in place as his sassed,
“Are you sure? Didn’t think you’d be after being with everyone else all the time.”
You sensed his words, and could feel the weight of jealousy in them, it only caused you to realize that he felt just as protective of you, as you did for him… but you hid your jealousy better. So you took the chance to tease him,
“Are you jealous Hobie Brown-“
Rolling his eyes and crossing his arms he pouted defensively,
“No. Absolutely not-“
You tried to tease him more as you pushed the guitar on his shoulder,
“Then what’s wrong? Looks like you are jealous-“
He sent a playful snap at you so you wouldn’t touch his treasure as he did his best to reassure,
“Tis’ nothin’ webs… I promise.”
His closed off attitude told you it was more than nothing, and you wouldn’t have it.. not his half or full lies about what’s going on. Hobie was about to walk away past you, but you grabbed his arm and insisted,
“Hobie! If you don’t do or say something about what’s going on with you I will explo- MMPH!!”
His warm hands got a hold of your face, pressing a harsh kiss to your lips. Eyes going wide open at the shock his actions caused you, but you couldn’t pull yourself away.
Not when you could see the way he had his shut with force, and the how his long lashes that you were always jealous of brush over his cheeks… you couldn’t deny how much you loved every detail about him. Your heart fluttered at the feeling of the cool of his nose ring press up against your nose, and his soft breathing hitting you, his lip ring marking a place on your lip as he gave you a bruising kiss.
You didn’t realize how long it took you admiring what you’ve always loved about him before you reciprocated the kiss, brining him closer to you by the collar of his jacket. But he slightly pushed you away, and before you could interpret something wrong, he muttered against your lips,
“you think I’m jealous webs?”
With a short chuckle you replied with sass,
“I think you’re very jealous Hobie.”
He smirked and webbed you your hands in an instant, your eyes found his with matching glares, filled with desire. He then put you to lay on the edge of the building, your head leaning off as he growled,
“I’ll show you jealous.”
With expert hands he was able to find your hidden zipper and slide down your pants along with your panties, enough to free your cunt for him to touch. Your hands as they were webbed up, hung off the edge, dangling down, stretching you a bit. Hobie pulled you close to him by gripping your thighs tightly, then he tore the web off your wrists with the pick for his guitar.
You were just about to reach for him, but he pushed you back once again, and laying his pick between your teeth as he ordered,
“Love, you keep that there safe for me.. and these hands.. hold onto the edge… don’t touch me until I tell you.. understood?”
You nodded once, taking all his commands in, wanting to meet them all, but Hobie hovered his face over yours and asked calmly,
“Words love.. do you feel ok and safe?”
You knew if you had a problem with something he’d adjust the universe to your liking, but right now you felt good and desperation. So you worded with the pick in between,
“I feel goo’.. I just wan’ you… I nee’ you.”
Pressing a hard kiss to your lips, feeling his favorite metal pick touch him, it stirred him on to take you now. His fingers found your cunt and stuck two in, going knuckle deep as your were soaking and taking him smoothly. With pride he watched your face contort in pleasure, the most beautiful moans leaving your lips because of him.
Your chest heaved for air as he pumped harder and faster, wanting you to come apart by his hands. The beauty of the city lights below you couldn’t compare to you, you were far too bright and gorgeous, so many things at once you were and yet, you were the most fit and complete person he had ever seen.
Your walls squeezed around his fingers, informing him you were near as your moans turned into cries as well. He teased you a bit as he slowed the pace, hearing you cry for ‘him’ had him groan and feeling his pants tighten more.
“H-Hobie! Ah please! Please-“
“What do you want love-“
“More! More please..”
Your eyes teared up as you cried for him, wanting to feel more of him as he had spurred on your high then took it away. He sucked on his fingers, letting out a moan,
“Sweet as always love.. never doubted you..”
Hobie then kissed your face, letting you taste yourself on him as he took the pick from your lips and he unbuckled his pants, sliding them down as he worded to you,
“C’mere love.”
Latching onto him as your arms wrapped around him, he pulled you up into his lap, sitting where you were at the edge, while looking up to you as your face was almost right at his. You both were breathing hard as you ran your hands through his hair and rested the other on his neck, Hobie’s hands exploring your back and thighs while kissing your neck. It was an all new sensation you both felt, not wanting to end it and growing addicted by the second. Hobie’s cock rested between your thighs, hitting his stomach and leaking precum, it had you reaching for it and playing with the red tip. He pulled you in for a kiss as you began to take him into your hands. His hips bucked up as your hands slid up and down his large length, spreading his cum and rubbing the tip with your thumb. He was getting to his high not so slowly, your hands bringing him on faster than he thought, so he abruptly stopped you with a pleading voice,
“Please love, need to feel you.. ready?”
You were already lifting your hips over his tip as you responded,
“I’m so ready.”
It wasn’t long before you slid down on him, your soaked walls taking him in right away. Once he bottomed out you both knew deep down, that you wouldn’t last long.
He was so deep, his tip touching your cervix, Hobie picked you up as he gripped your thighs tightly, then he slid you back down, groaning into your lips at the pleasure he instantly felt. Hobie didn’t care and wasn’t afraid of the position he was in, as he sat at the edge of the skyscraper, with you in his lap taking all of him. He confided in his strength to withhold you, and make you feel good more than anything. You than began to bounce on his cock, letting out whimper’s and mewls when you slid back down, feeling the stretch overtake you. Hobie helped you speed up as he took control and moved his hips to meet you at every thrust. Warmth began to seep into your core again, but burning more this time. You pulled Hobie closer to you as you begged,
“I need you more- please!”
“I know my love.. me too.”
Hobie needed the same, and fully take control, so he changed positions and laid you on your back, wrapping your legs around his waist. You held onto his hands as they were above your head, and took a deep breath as you prepared for what came. With locked gazes, Hobie pulled back and thrusted into you right away, loving how you responded to him so well by clenching around him and moaning his name. Little by little he picked up his speed, knowing you both needed your much needed release, warmth engulfing you both as well as a passion for more.
Hobie railed into you now as he asked in between pants,
“Who do you belong to love?”
Breathing out a moan when he hit a particular spot, you cried out,
“Y-You! You Hobie!!”
Letting go of your hand to hold your hips down with extra force, Hobie punctuated each word with a harsh thrust,
“You. Sure. Love?”
Hitting your cervix every time had your toes curling and backs arching to him while you whimpered,
“Yes!! I’m yours Hobie Brown!!”
You could feel him throb inside of your walls, as you clenched around him, nearing your release. Hobie could feel the release nearing too, your warm walls taking him in and milking his precum into you. Now all he desired in that moment was for you to let go for him, and only him. Increasing his speed and piercing his grip into you, Hobie demanded with a sweet but firm tone,
“Beg for me love.. t-tell me who it is that is making you co-come.”
Doing his best to hold on a bit longer, Hobie awaited your answer, pleading from his heart that it’d be soon as he wished to claim you already and paint your walls with him. You clawed his back and pulled him closer, kissing his earlobe you then panted and moaned into his ear,
“Only you can Hobie.. please- ahh! Make me come- please please Hobie!”
His jealousy for you along with a new unlocked sensation… possessiveness, had him wanting to here you beg more.
“Beg me to make you come-“
He then lowered his hand to your clit, and began to rub tight circles around your bud, urging you to cry out in a desperate tone, tears evident that you were desperate.
“-AHH!! Oh Hobie! Please- please baby make me cum! Only y-you can!! So p-please!!”
Letting out a deep breath Hobie moaned into your hair,
“Come my love, come wi’ me.”
Feeling him pulsate along with his sharp thrusts, had you coming undone under his arms, coating his cock with your juices. Hobie brought you in for a deep kiss when he came, swallowing yours and his moans as he then slowly rode out both of your highs, wanting it to last a little longer. He was the opposite from how he started, which was rough… but now he gave gentle strokes, only pulling away when you told him it was too sensitive now. You were both out of breath and pulling away at once to catch some air, your chests touching from how close you were but also how much air you were taking in. Hobie gave your forehead a short but meaningful kiss before pulling away, but instead you pulled him in for a hug, hiding your face in his neck as you reassured him,
“I’ll only and always be yours Hobie Brown.. I promise.”
Hobie squeezed you tight and was grateful for your embrace, and he ran his fingers through your hair, as he returned the promise,
“I’ll be yours too love.. forever.”
Your eyes twinkled, as he confessed,
“I’m sorry I never made it clear webs.. but I do love you… very much so.”
With a soft peck you replied,
“I love you too… I always have Hobie.”
In a silence you too held each other, satisfied with your actions, more in love and thriving for more days like this to come.
Maybe this love making session was unexpected and out of the blue for the both of you, but it felt so right, and so good. A little breeze of wind then brushed by, causing you to shiver a bit in Hobie’s arms, a second didn’t go by when he suggested,
“Let’s get us home yeah? Don’ want ya to get cold lovie…”
Carefully he helped you put back on your suit, being extra touchy but extremely gentle as he zipped you up (but he didn’t do this before taking a look at your- his cunt now dripping from his cum.
Soon you too helped Hobie with his pants, and getting his guitar safely back into his hold. Both slipping on your masks, you were ready to swing home, but your legs were a little to wobbly for your liking. Hobie caught the slight stumble before holding you up and telling you,
“I’ll carry you home.. on my back lovie.”
With you tightly secured around him, he took off and swung towards home, going through the city so you could have the last look of the city night lights… as he knew it was one of your favorite parts of being Spider-Woman. Efficiently he swung by a stand full of flowers, plucking one off and easily giving it to you, a smile made it to your face as the rose was given to you with a brush of his hands touching yours. You blushed hard like if it was the first time he touched you, and hadn’t just made love to you on the tallest building of your city.
You never felt fear as you embraced him with the rose in your hand tightly. You trusted Hobie’s skills as you had seen them be incredibly strong and capable of much, while swinging he’d collect something he’d like and hand it to you.. so far you have 3 different flowers and a lollipop. Hobie had sticky fingers.. but you didn’t mind it, he wasn’t selfish with his findings.
It didn’t take long when you finally arrived at your balcony, he made sure your feet were flat on the ground before letting you go. Walking into your dark home didn’t feel lonely and filled with void like before, now you held Hobie’s hand tight as you led him to your room, wordlessly telling him you really wanted him to stay the night, if not forever. You both jumped into the shower wanting it to be quick, your night having been long and you both were craving to lay down in one another’s arms. Hobie’s hands never left your body as he helped you scrub down, he never looked at you like you’re a piece of meat.. but as if you were such a treasure to behold. It didn’t matter about your battle scars or the shape of you, he was now addicted and more in love. You treated Hobie the same way, wanting to show him that you indeed wanted him and him only, asking him questions about how he does his hair and wanting to memorize his steps to keep his styled hair in tact (as you loved how his hair looked) Drying off in fluffy towels, and sharing the air-blow dryer, you too were soon ready for bed. Hobie lifted you up from the thighs and carried you in, laying you down gently and pecking your lips all so romantically, before plopping himself on top of you. A breathy groan left your lips as he cuddled into your stomach, acting innocent and slightly ignoring how he had dropped onto you. He made sure he was in a good spot, not wanting his hair to be in your face, but close enough where you can rub his head. Soft kisses were given on your tummy as he worded again and again, softly yet possessively,
“You’re mine.. all mine. This body, your heart… you. Right baby?”
You could never say no.
“Yes baby.. all yours.. all of me.”
He smiled to himself as he lastly cooed,
“I love you..”
His chest warmed up as he heard your reply,
“I love you more..”
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alientee · 3 months
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Alastor x Jessica Rabbit reader part 3
I lied there will be a fourth part 🤣 sorry I’ve been gone for so long. By the way this amazing art was drawn by @klaudia96art it’s based on this story I just had to have me and my demon drawn lol
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Alastor and you made it back to the hotel without any more problems, you both headed towards the kitchen the kitchen. “Alright darling I’ll get the ingredients out, I can’t wait to taste your cooking once more.” You set your gift down on the table pulling your hair back. “Well considering I’ve spent so much time with your mom I bet it’ll taste just as good as hers.”
You start to wash your hands and hear something crash to the ground. As you turn around Alastor is looking at you with a thin smile his eyes as wide as they can get. “H-how is my ma….I’m sure she has her doubts that id ever show up in heaven seeing as it’s been so long” You walk towards him bringing your hand up to caress his face. He leans into your touch his eyes looking more gentle than crazed as usual. When it came to his mother Alastor wanted nothing more than to make sure she was happy, her opinion is what mattered most in the world. "She always say’s she just hopes your alright and happy wherever you are. And that she misses you.”
Alastor rest his head into your neck, inhaling your scent. It had been so long since he’s been able to hold you, to feel content again. Usually he hates being touched by others, it feels like a disgusting burn he can’t get rid of. He was never a fan of touch unless he initiated it, unless it was from his mother and you were soon added to the equation. A thought hit him and once again he was tense pulling back looking at you frantically like an actual deer caught in headlights.
“Please don’t tell her why I’m down here. It would break her heart, and I can’t stand the thought of knowing I disappointed her.” You could feel his fingers tighten on your shoulder, any harder and he would break skin. As you tried to calm him down you realized just how much your husband was still there. Yes he was a killer and a cannibal who had no problem taking in the joy in the suffering of others. But he was still a mamas boy through and through.
“Alastor I have to tell your mom I saw you she misses you so much. She just wants to know you’re doing ok. But I won’t tell her…. Why you’re down here, it’s not my story to tell anyway.” He paused for a moment sighing “I suppose that’s good enough for me….. should we start cooking?”
“Oh no mister I’m cooking. Your gonna sit down and relax” you push alastor to the table pulling out a chair for him “But dear-“ “No buts! It’s been so long since I cooked for you. I missed spoiling my husband hehe.” Alastor could only sigh and lean both arms on the table his hand resting in his hands looking at you with that large goofy smile. “If you insist sugar”
As you began to cook more of the residents started to show up much to alastor an annoyance. Angel was the first one to walk through. “Wow toots you got it smelling great in here! Watcha cooking?” You giggled, you were kinda embaressed to say you went overboard with the cooking. “Well I made jambalaya, shrimp and grits, fried chicken, corn bread and a peach cobbler. Husk almost spits out his drink at the spread your making.
“I know I went to overboard, it’s just been so long since I’ve cooked for alastor I wanted to make all his favorites minus the cobbler. Feel free to join us I know we won’t eat it all.” You hear alastor muttering under his breath that the others could leave. You went back to cooking as the rest of the residents filled in but you stare at Charlie when she entered with a man who looked just like her. When both your eyes lock he looks at Charlie happily. “Charlie is this the angel you were telling me about?”
You leave the stove and walk towards him “hello I’m ____,It’s nice to meet you.” Lucifer pulls your hand up to his lips kissing it. “Charmed, it’s a pleasure to meet you” the room is filled with a sound of large static making everyone cringe. Lucifer is the only one who looks bored, rolling his eyes. “Problem bell hop?” Alastor is by your side in an instant.
“Keep your mouth away from my wife” Lucifer looks at you and alastor back and forth until his eyes land on Charlie. “So you weren’t kidding, he’s actually married….. to them…..and you agreed to marry him willingly not by force?” He looks back at you and seeing you nod in confirmation is all he needs for him to put a deadpan look on his face. “…….But you’re way out of his league like waaaaaay out of his league. Plus I don’t think Bell hop boy here knows how to…..satisfy needs that’s arnt cananalistic?” “I beg your pardon? Why the fuck does everyone keep bringing that up?”
You shake your head as you hear angel dust laughing in the back ground. Saying how he had said the same thing earlier, in between laughs. “Yes so I’ve been told, and I think he’s in my league just fine, I can’t wait to show y’all the pictures after dinner, alastor was so handsome hehe.” Alastor looks caught off guard for a second before grabbing your shoulder. “Now dear I’m sure no one wants to see that-“
“He’s lying”
“We all want to see it”
“My rival in hissss youth? Excellent ammunition for later batlesssss”
Alastor just looks more annoyed but seeing your big doe eyes looking at him reminding him so much of why he couldn’t resist your wims when you were both alive. “Very well but you will only see the pictures of my choosing and there will be no more than 3” Everyone groaned but accepted it knowing alastor shouldn’t be pushed over the edge. “Foods ready! I hope y’all like it” Everyone starts to make a plate except for alastor, you make him two plates with all the food you made on them except for the dessert.
While you serve him his plate kissing his cheek everyone can’t seem to stop staring,even nifty. Seeing the very independent radio demon getting served with a goofy smile on his face was so domestic and strange. But what no one else expected was for you to make a plate for Lucifer. He started thanking you profusely looking really shy about it. Everyone else was trying to scoot away from alastor who was starting to let his shadow tendrils rise. “Thank you! So much but I’m… you didn’t have too. Not that I’m not grateful! It’s very sweet of you”
“It’s my pleasure you are the king after all.” “Oh NO no no no no no. Please treat me like any other guest. I hate all the kingly stuff haha. How bout I make you a plate full of pancakes tomorrow?” You shrug stating you’re only here for today but you appreciated the offer.” Cherri bomb looked at you giving you a crooked smile. “So tell us about you and smiley, any good stories?” You tried to think of the least embarrassing but most entertaining memory you can think of.
“Well now that I know Al’s past this story makes much more sense now. Me and him went camping with some of my friends. Mind you I’ve known these people for over 10 years. One of my friends got really drunk and ended up falling off a cliff but he swear he was pushed, but none of us believed him because he was waisted. Then a bear ended up chasing him because he had leftover food in his pocket. He just had terrible luck the whole trip and guess who was near him that whole time.”
Everyone turned to look at alastor who continues to eat with a thin smile. “What? He talked over everyone, made crude jokes to my wife, and thought he could play jokes on ME of all people. The trip was more enjoyable with him unconscious. He should consider himself lucky he’s not dead, had he not been my wife’s good friend he wouldn’t have left the camp grounds.”
“I still can’t believe all of that really was you” You made your way back to the sink to clean the dishes, you could hear all the complements on your food and while you thanked them you could feel something pulling at your side. It’s nifty, and it looks like she’s trying to reach for your face. “A mess! Don’t worry I’ll get it miss.” You didn’t know what on earth she was taking about untill you felt someone come behind you and a wet sensation on your cheek.
It didn’t dawn on you what happened until you saw Alastor behind you. You blush in embarrassment realizing that he licked your cheek. “You had a little sauce on your face dear, now come sit and eat” you were about to comment until angel muttered. “I can’t believe I got that” you turned to see him holding his phone up, he must’ve wanted to take pictures of you and alastor. Speaking of alastor you don’t think you could move fast enough to stop him from pouncing at angel dust.
Speaking of alastor you don’t think you could move fast enough to stop him from pouncing at angel dust. “Alastor No!” Lucky enough Lucifer had been enough to restrain him. But if looks could kill both Lucifer and Angel would be dead by now. Seeing as the “big dick in charge” had a hold on Alastor, Angel Dust decided to get one final jab in. “Can you tell us a story now of why Ole freak face is sad in the sack?”
Too bad for him Lucifer’s grip couldn’t hold shadows though.
This was not proof read much~
@fairyv-ice @sirens-and-moonflowers @cannibalcoyote @jyoongim @thereeallink @sakuraluna2468 @fandomfan-102 @crystal-freak24
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holymusicalmothman · 9 months
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Eat at Baratie! - OPLA!Sanji x Fem!Reader
Might do a part two, there might be more of this that comes to mind!
Inspo is from @madmadamemimble who said : "Sanji recognizes reader as a former patron of the baratie a few years back. Why does he remember them? They dined and dashed. On his watch. Zeff. Was. Furious. He still begrudges them for the lengthy month of chore duty he got stuck with as a result. But how could he ever stay mad at someone so beautiful, kind and charming."
Warnings: none? mentions of a dine and dash in the past. Don't do that to your waiters guys :)
Word Count: 1k
Main Masterlist
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You felt yourself tense when your little brother led you all through the fog and towards the Baratie. Normally you didn’t return to places that you had left on a rather…unhappy note. But you also knew that you didn’t stand a chance against Luffy’s appetite. 
But maybe the waiter from before wasn’t working there anymore? And the Head Chef and Owner, who you knew to be Red Leg Zeff, had never seen your face. So you knew there was a slight chance you’d make it through this. After all, you didn’t even have a reservation.
You weren’t proud of your prior actions, but back then the simple dine and dash had just been a moment in the wind. You definitely hadn’t planned on returning. 
And you definitely weren’t telling your brother. 
Growing up two years Luffy’s elder, you made it your own personal mission to look out for him. Especially after Shanks had left. You had taken his departure personally, the pirate genuinely being your father. Luffy had never quite told you how that moment had affected him, it was the one of the few things he had never opened up to you about. But you had seen how much he treasured his hat. He called you his sister though. And you called him your brother. 
You and Nami stood more towards the back of the group as Luffy and Usopp attempted to get a table. 
“You’re tense.” She pointed out. 
Being the only two girls aboard the Going Merry, you liked to think you and Nami were friends. 
You lowered your voice. “Don’t tell my brother, but I might have dined and dashed here a few years back.”
Her eyebrows shot up. “You?”
You nodded. “Took a few months a few years back to see what I could. I felt restless back home, and Luffy wasn’t quite ready to head for the Grand Line. I wound up here, hungry and broke. I feel bad for the waiter, if I’m honest. He was…charming, and easy on the eyes.”
Nami smirked, a quick laugh passing through her nose. “Well then, maybe he’s still working here.” She walked over to the host and pulled some Berry from her pouch. “Excuse those two, they’re idiots.”
“Nami!” You were floored. Had she not been listening when you said you had dined and dashed?
“Relax, you said it yourself, it’s been years.” 
You groaned as you followed the group to the table, seating yourself between Nami and Zoro, trying to vanish into the booth. 
“Are you okay?” Luffy asked, not quite sure what to make of your antics but concerned none the less. 
You kicked Nami in the shin under the table as she opened her mouth.
“I’m fine. Just tired.” You told your brother, reluctantly sitting up. 
There was a shout a ways away, toward the entrance to the kitchens. You couldn’t quite tell what was happening from your angle, but you recognized the accented voice that followed. 
“No cause for alarm folks, return to your meals.”
Your gaze fused itself to the tablecloth. 
A basket of bread was set on the table. 
“Hi, welcome to our shitty restraunt where the only thing worse than the ambiance is our food. My name is Sanji, what can I get for you?”
You frowned, looking up. 
It was the same man from the last time you were here, but the charm was…missing. Odd. 
Luffy had dug into the bread with joy. “One of everything please!” 
Sanji glanced at your brother. “Anything to drink? Perhaps one of our signature cocktails to help you choke down your meal?”
Your eyebrows shot up. 
“Wow. Giving us the hard sell.” Nani’s voice was sarcastic and rather deadpan. 
It was like a switch had been flipped. Sanjis eyes flickered from Nami to you and seemed to linger. 
“Apologies, madames, I didn’t see you there. Would you care for an aperitif to start? We have several rare Micqueot vintages in stock. Or perhaps a glass of Umeshu? You know, something sweet for someone sweet.”
The wink that followed was obviously directed at you and you felt your cheeks warm despite the situation. You returned your gaze to the table.
“Something wrong with your eye?” Nami questioned. 
Sanji merely smiled. “Just blinded by beauty.”
You heard Nami order the both of you plain waters and the receding footsteps of your waiter. 
As soon as he was out of earshot, the boys started giggling at the obvious flip to his personality. You rolled your eyes and nudged Zoro to let you out of the booth. 
“I’mma get some air.” You muttered lamely. 
The open air bar was cooler than the dining room, you noticed as you leaned against the railing. 
“You caused me quite the bit of trouble the last time you were here. I trust you don’t plan on pulling such a stunt again?”
The blond was at your side, resting his forearms on the railing, a lit cigarett dangling from his fingertips. 
“I have berry.” 
He raised a brow, taking a drag. “And you didn’t before I take it.”
You shook your head. “Not at the time. I’m sorry about that by the way. I didn’t mean to get you into any trouble with Zeff.”
“It wasn’t too bad,” he smiled, grey blue eyes meeting yours. “Just a month’s worth of extra kitchen chores. Honestly, Zeff could have done much worse. I think, that as long as it doesn’t happen again, we’ll be alright.”
“We?”
“I trust you’ll be docked while your ship receives repairs, and I’d love a chance to get to know a lady as charming as yourself.”
You laughed. Something about him was enthralling. You couldn’t tell if it was the charm, the accent, the smile, the way his hair fell in his face, or even just the way he looked. Something about him reeled you in like a fish on a line. 
“Maybe a drink after my shift?” He asked, hopefully.
“I’d like that, Sanji.” You said with a smile. 
“Ah, and the beautiful lady blesses me with a drink. I should get back to work, I’ll see you later then?”
“Yeah, I should be getting back to my brother.”
“Until later, then.”
You smiled as he walked away, back into the dining room. Maybe coming back to the Baratie was a good idea after all.
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explosionkatsu · 1 year
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“Age doesn't matter” 2
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Dad!Bakugou x F!Babysitter!Teacher!Reader
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It was now 6 am in the morning and usually, at this hour, Katsuki would be carrying his snoozing son in his arms while he got his things to drop him off to his parents and left for work. But today is different.
“I’m dropping you off at school tomorrow,” Katsuki said turning his back to his son and proceeding with cooking.
“Really!?” His son excitedly said, eyes gleaming with joy. “My classmates get to see you!”
“Yeah, yeah. Make sure you got the things you needed for school so there won't be a problem tomorrow morning.” Katsuki said.
Once he was done cooking, he took two small bowls from the kitchen cabinet and a pair of chopsticks before placing them all down on the dining table. He then moved back to the kitchen and grab the dish he made and place it on the table as well. “Oi. Time to eat.” He called out. But as soon as he went to check the living room, he saw no one.
“Tch.” He tched. “Kazui!! Get down here and eat!”
“Yes! I’m coming, i’m coming!” His son yelled and arrived, running downstairs from his room. “I was just packing the stuff I need as you said!”
“Don’t run down the stairs, brat!” Katsuki crossed his arms as he watched his son make himself comfortable. Hearing a small sorry from him made Katsuki ruffle his child’s hair before sitting down beside him.
Katsuki was taking his time preparing their breakfast. A simple egg and fried rice in the morning would be healthy enough for both of them. Once breakfast is done, he searches for his son’s school lunch bag before grabbing the bento box from its drying shelf. Settling the bento box on the kitchen counter, he made his way to his fridge where he grab three pieces of strawberries and sliced them into bite sizes, two pieces of bread pudding, and an orange juice box. He brought out the sausages he prepared earlier from the microwave to keep them hot and place all his son’s lunch in his bento box and put it inside the bag along with the chopsticks.
Katsuki was used to this manner by now, especially since he is convinced that him, preparing his son’s lunch would be so much better rather than his mother who he was a hundred percent convinced that Mitsuki would give Kazui sweets that were unhealthy. The only difference today is he’ll be dropping him off at school.
Thanks to Kirishima taking an early shift, he manages to fit this into his schedule.
Once everything was completed, Katsuki made his way to his son’s room. Knocking oh so quietly before inviting himself in.
“Oi. It's time to wake up.” Katsuki said as he stood by the bed. Although, seeing his son didn't move an inch made him raise his voice a bit. “Brat. Time to go to school.” His second attempt at waking him up seems to work when he saw him shift under his blanket before slowly sitting up, hair disheveled.
“Papa..” Kazuo mumbled rubbing his eyes.
Katsuki's gaze softened. Boy, he was glad that his son looks exactly like him. The only difference he can see was Kazui’s hair looking a bit smooth due to his ex-wife's straight ones unlike his spiky ones, and no permanent scowl.
“Come on. Breakfast’s ready.” Katsuki said. He saw his son raise his arms asking to be lifted up which Katsuki did without breaking a sweat. “And there I thought you were a big boy now,” he mumbled. He exited the room and went down to the kitchen where he seated his son on his chair.
An hour and a half passed and both father and son were now ready to leave. Kazui has his backpack on and Katsuki was now wearing his work clothes. He got everything ready before they both depart their home and directed straight to their garage where his auto was waiting.
While Katsuki was arranging his son’s car seat, he felt Kazui tug his pants from outside the car. “What is it?” He asked while concentrating on what he was doing.
“Why aren't you in your hero costume?” Kazui asked a bit sad that his classmate won't be able to witness his dad wearing his hero suit.
“My suit remains inside my office where I change. Plus wearing my suit while dropping you off at school would be risky. I don't want any villain striking your school just because they saw me drop you off.” Katsuki said. “Get in.” He added and secure the belt around Kazui who was now seated and closed the car door once the belt was secured. He then gets into the driver’s seat and fastened his seatbelt before he starts the engine and drove off.
The drive was peaceful and quiet. Katsuki is focusing on the road while his son watches everything pass by. Although, this quietness of his son sometimes makes him wonder where he got it from. Not from him, nor his mother that's for sure.
His train of thought was cut off when the school was within his eyesight. Katsuki slightly stepped on the gas and reached the front of the school where he saw a lot of kids being dropped off by their parents. Once he saw where he could park, he turned off the engine. But as soon as he exited his car, people around him started looking.
"Oh, my god. It's Dynamight."
"Mommy look! A hero!"
"Dynamight is here!"
Katsuki tched at this, especially when he saw they started coming closer. But he paid them no mind and went to the back passenger seat where Kazui was waiting for him.
Katsuki open the car door, unfastened his seatbelt, and then helped him get off the car. When Kazui was off, Katsuki slam the car door shut. It was loud enough to let the people around him hear.
"Didn't know there would be a lot of people around here at this hour. Should've fucking gotten my disguise." Katsuki mumble.
"Papa, language." His son scowled at him grabbing his papa's hand.
"Shut it," Katsuki answered and grasp his hand as they both crossed the road.
Once they get to the other side, Katsuki saw a woman that seems to be younger than him exit the building. Her (Hair Length) (Hair color) hair swayed with the wind as she greeted every parent with a smile.
"Look, papa! It's Ms. Y/n!"
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javierpena-inatacvest · 9 months
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Chapter 12- I Love You. I Know.
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Summary: As the end of October approaches, you and Javi learn more about celebrating Halloween and Dia De Los Muertos together. After a sleepless night, and a Halloween party at the Murphy's, Javi begins to open up to you about his past.
Word Count: 15.6K (I'm sweating)
Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (don't be silly, wrap your willy), oral (m receiving), vaginal fingering, creampie, praise kink, semi-public sex (Oh the poor Murphy's...), PTSD/Anxiety around grief, loss and Javi's past, some angst/tension, mentions of drinking/being drunk (Steve is getting PLASTERED), mentions of food/eating, SO MANY STAR WARS REFERENCES, literally this chapter made me sob while I was writing it, editing it, and re-reading it, I am SO sorry
A/N: You guys. Holy shit. This chapter really had me in my feels. This chapter was def a labor of love, but I'm really happy with how it turned out!! Thank you for as always for all you kind words, you truly, truly, TRULY have no idea how much your support means to me 😭💖 Also please don't kill me after you finish reading this chapter I PROMISE *things* are happening so soon I can literally taste it, but I needed for this chapter to happen first, and you would be silly to think that *things* didn't get its own whole ass chapter and I am just as excited as you AH
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The excitement of October’s conclusion was in the air, and the joys of getting to celebrate what you hoped would be the first of many holidays with Javi was at the forefront of your mind. While the end of summer meant school was here and your carefree days were gone until next June, October meant it was time for one of your favorite holidays- Halloween. It was one of your most cherished things to celebrate as a kid, and even still as an adult. The memories of jumping into leaf piles off your swingset with your brothers, dressing up in goofy, homemade costumes to trick-or-treat (because your mom was not about to buy 4 new sets of costumes every single year), carving pumpkins, and stealing as many of your brother’s Kit Kat bars as you could without getting caught, filled your heart with a warmth and joy that you couldn’t quite describe. While the 80 degree temperatures and lack of bright reds and yellows painted across the leaves falling from their trees was much different from the Chicago Octobers you were accustomed to, it hadn’t stopped you from heading full steam into Halloween. 
“So do you have any thoughts on what we should be for Steve and Connie’s? I have no problem going out to buy stuff for costumes, but I can already hear my mom yelling at me for wasting my money on cheaply made clothes I’m gonna wear for 5 hours when I have something perfectly good in my closet.” You rolled your eyes as you shuffled through the hangers, Javi sitting on the edge of your bed folding the laundry you were working on putting away. 
The two of you had gladly accepted the invitation from Steve and Connie to spend the weekend with them in San Antonio, as the Murphy’s planned to host a Halloween party at their house for their friends and co-workers, giving you and Javi a chance to have a fun weekend out of town together. 
“Hmmmm?” He asked, looking up at you as you grabbed a few shirts, examining them for costume potential. “We’re dressing up for this thing?” 
“Yeah, that’s like, the whole point of Halloween, dummy.” You giggled, throwing a few options on the floor before making your way over to your pants. “Didn’t you dress up as a kid for Halloween?” 
Unlike yourself, Javi had spent his whole life celebrating Día de los Muertos, Halloween having nowhere near as much relevance to him as it did to you, spending the end of October and first days of November gathering with his family to spend the day making Pan de Muerto (Day of the Dead sweet bread),  watching the parades on the streets of Downtown Laredo before visiting the cemetery where his grandparents were buried, decorating their graves in cempasúchil (marigold flowers), candles and photographs with his primos (cousins). Since his mom had passed, Javi hadn’t been home to celebrate with his family, and had almost forgone the tradition completely during his time in Colombia, the pain and loss of his mother and the solemn sadness of celebrating alone leading him to try his best to forget about the holiday all together. 
“Uh, no, not, not really. Didn’t really do Halloween, isn’t really as much of a thing down here. My family always celebrated Día de Los Muertos instead.” He replied, almost embarrassed by his answer, not wanting to damper your excitement as you dug through your closet for costumes. 
Your heart sank to your stomach, feeling awful that you hadn’t even taken into consideration that Javi's traditions around this time of year were completely different from what you were used to. The two of you had never really talked about how you wanted to celebrate future holidays, and always had wanted to make sure that the important parts of your lives were celebrated equally. Javi hadn’t said anything after you had spent the past few days putting up Halloween decorations around your apartment, and now you felt like an idiot assuming he had spent his whole life celebrating just like you. 
“Oh… Shit. Javi, I’m so sorry, if you don’t wanna do costumes, we don’t have to, you just hadn’t said anything about Día de Los Muertos so I just assumed that-” 
“Baby, it’s okay.” He pushed himself up off the bed, the width of his broad palms wrapping around your hips, trying to ease the guilt he could tell was rapidly consuming you. “You’re right, I never told you about it. It’s been a long time since I’ve done anything to celebrate it, and I haven’t been home for it since I’ve gotten back from Colombia. I just- I don’t really know how to feel about it, I guess. The last time I did anything for it was before my mom died. I was never able to bring myself to do anything about it while I was gone, and I guess now I just feel really shitty that was the way I decided to handle it.” It broke your heart to see the pain in his eyes, pulling yourself closer to him as you wrapped your arms around his stomach, leaning your head against his chest. It was then, the realization had hit you too- This would be your first year of holidays without Patrick. You didn’t know as much as you would have liked to about Día de Los Muertos, but you did know that it was to celebrate the lives of loved ones you’d lost, a feeling that you and Javi were both all too familiar with. 
“Listen…” You raised your head, looking up at him, arms still intertwined around his waist. “I don’t- I don’t wanna make you do anything that you’re uncomfortable with. I guess this is the first time we’ve ever really talked about this kind of stuff. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, Jav, and that means celebrating the things that are special to both of us. The things that are important to you are important to me too. I want our lives for us, for our future family, to be filled with all the things we care the most about, whether that means keeping old traditions or making our own new ones. It would mean a lot to me to get to celebrate Día de los Muertos with you, and if it’s okay, I would love to sprinkle in some Halloween too, because I’m fucking dying to carve a pumpkin.” 
You smiled up at him as his hand slid under your jaw, his thumb tracing across your cheek as he tried his best to hold back the tears welling in his eyes. It took everything in him to not ruin his plans, wanting to run into the bedroom, grab the ring out of his sock drawer and propose to you that very instant. Even after all this time, Javi still couldn't believe that he was the person you wanted to share the rest of your life with. That you wanted to intertwine your past, present, and future with his, to have a life, a family, together that the two of you could cherish forever. Never in a million years had he assumed he’d be anywhere close to where he was today, holding the world’s most beautiful, perfect woman in his arms, as she told him how she wanted nothing more than to build a family and spend the rest of her days with him. 
“Osita… I fucking love you so much, you know that?” He leaned in, his lips meeting yours in a soft and deep kiss, your heart racing as he pulled you in tighter. 
“Yeah, I mean, I guess, just a little bit…” You giggled, poking fun at him, considering not a day had passed since the first night he had said it that Javi hadn’t told you just how much he loved you. 
“Shut up, you dork.” He chuckled, making you squeal as he picked you up, playfully shaking you in his grasp before setting you back down. “I’d love nothing more, Hermosa. I don’t know how the fuck you’re supposed to carve a pumpkin or what the hell you have planned for these costumes, but I’m all in. I want it all with you, Osita. Thank you.” 
“Of course. For as much or as little as you want to do for Día de los Muertos, I’m all in too. I’m gonna be honest, I love Hallowen. Not as much as Christmas, but it’s a close second. It means you’re gonna have to trust me with a giant ass knife and cover yourself in pumpkin guts, though.”
“My trust is quickly starting to fade. Seriously though, what the hell are we supposed to dress up as?” He raised an eyebrow at you, nodding over to the pile of clothes you had pulled from your closet, now piled on the floor. 
“Don’t worry, I’ve got some ideas.” 
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  The weeks leading up to the holidays had made for fun at home date nights, the both of you genuinely looking forward to learning about the traditions you had both held so dear to your hearts. Almost every night after work, you had done something to celebrate the events leading up to the day. You had shown Javi a few of your favorite Halloween movies, including It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, Beetlejuice, and Ghostbusters, very adamantly insisting to him that those movies were about as scary as you were going to get, blaming your brothers for scarring you after forcing you to watch The Exorcist at the ripe age of 7 years old. In addition to the movies, you had told him about other funny Trick-Or-Treating stories from your childhood, Javi’s favorite being how your brothers, (being the ruthless idiots they were) paid one of their friends in all of their halloween candy to jump out of a bush dressed as a terrifying old lady to scare the absolute shit out of you, and making you quite literally pee your pants. In return Javi shared his favorite memories of cooking in the kitchen with his mom as she made Pan de Muertos for his family, the two of you even attempting to make it one of the nights after work, milling about the kitchen together as Javi told you about his family you had yet to meet, or had passed away long before you. 
After a lengthy hunt, you were able to find pumpkins, bringing them to Chucho’s house to carve them since you had nowhere to put them inside your apartment. You offered him the rest of your Pan de Muertos in exchange for a place to work on your pumpkins, and while he gladly accepted the bread, the three of you knew Chucho was always happy to have you and Javi over, regardless. 
“So tell me, mija,” Chucho spoke in between mouthfuls of sweet bread, rocking back and forth in his chair, “is there a meaning behind carving the pumpkins, or is it just for fun?” 
“Just for fun! Okay, it looks like we’re ready, you want me to show you how to do it, or just let you go for it?” You smiled at Javi, the two of you sitting cross legged on Chucho’s porch, pumpkins open in front of you. 
“You just scoop them out, right?” Javi questioned, looking into the pumpkin with an unsure grimace. “It seems like there's a lot in here, Osita. I have to get all of it out?” 
“Yeah, or else you can’t see the design when you carve it. C’mon you big baby, just stick your hand in there and pull the guts out!” You laughed, digging your hand into your pumpkin, scooping out hearty globs of pumpkin guts, slopping them into the bucket Chucho had set out for you. Reluctantly, Javi joined, you and Chucho both absolutely dying at Javi’s face as his hand met the squishy fibers inside his pumpkin. 
“Jesus, that feels fucking gross!” He laughed, shaking his head as he threw some of the seeds and strings into the trash next to him. 
“You need me to do it for you?” You giggled, flicking a pumpkin seed at him as he winced with the second handful he pulled out. 
“No, cabrón (asshole), I can do it.” Javi grumbled as he rolled his eyes at you, the both of you scooping hearty handfuls of goop. 
“You hear that, Chucho? Calling me an asshole because he’s too scared to pull out pumpkin guts.” You looked back at his dad, giving him a playful grin, his smile already wide from the enjoyment of watching the two of you. With your back turned to Javi, you hadn’t noticed the small handful of seeds he had collected in his hand, lining up his arm to aim right at the back of your head. “I can’t believe that- HEY!” You whipped your neck around, running your hand over the back of your neck, picking seeds and strings out of your hair, seeing Javi snicker to himself as your jaw dropped open in shock. “Did you seriously just throw pumpkin guts at me?!” 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, must have been a ghost.” He shrugged, smirking to himself before digging his hand back into his pumpkin. 
“You see this?!” You looked back at Chucho, pointing your finger at Javi, pretending to be stern, although your laughter quickly escaped. “Absolutely ridiculous, I swear.” 
“Javier, that is no way to treat your future esposa! (Wife) No quiero mis nietos ser cubierto en calabaza! Me encantáran en cualquier caso, pero todavía! (I don’t want my future grandchildren covered in pumpkin! I will love them either way, but still!)” Chucho scolded with a smirk, you and Javi silently smiling to each other at the thought of one day doing this with your own children. Javi had tried to stop fighting off his dad’s comments about grandkids a while ago- Chucho knew just as well as the two of you that he would have his grandchildren soon enough. 
“Ella lo pído… (She asked for it…)” Javi muttered under his breath, shooting his gaze up at you as he felt cold goop hit the side of his cheek, wiping the pumpkin you had just thrown at him off with the back of his hand, watching you smirk silently to yourself as you continued to scoop out your pumpkin.
“Ahora… Estamos a mano. (And now… We’re even.)” 
The 3 of you chatted on the porch, the sky now painted a dark black, filled with twinkling constellations above as you finished carving your pumpkins. Yours, a cute ghost with a little smiley face, and Javi’s, what he had tried to convince you and Chucho was also a ghost, even though it looked more like he had just carved a squiggly hole in the middle of his. It took a little prodding and convincing, but as you all talked about how the Peña family had spent many a Día de los Muertos, you and Chucho were able to get Javi to agree to go visit his mom’s gravesite on the Sunday after you got back from Steve and Connie’s party. Chucho had even promised to keep his tias, tios, and primos (aunts, uncles, and cousins) completely out of the picture this year, wanting to give Javi all the time and space he needed to go see his mom for the first time since her funeral. He was reluctant at first, riddled with the guilt of leaving her unvisited all these years, but as he felt the gentle squeeze of your hand, your silent reassurance was all he needed to know that you would be by his side, every step of the way. As you said your goodbyes, Chucho hugged you just a little extra tighter than normal, as if to thank you for everything you had done for his son, and just how thankful he was to have you in his life, too. 
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Even though the Murphy’s had very graciously offered to let you and Javi stay on Friday night as well as Saturday, both Steve and Connie very much understood when you had told them on the phone that the only thing that you wanted to do after coming home from the chaos of managing an elementary school Halloween party was take a very, very long nap. You and Javi had spent the night ordering pizza and watching Young Frankenstein, only lasting about 20 minutes into the movie before you were dead asleep, snoring against Javi’s chest, still dressed in If You Give A Mouse A Cookie costume from earlier today. Carrying you to bed and undressing you from your mouse ears and oversized overalls, Javi curled into bed next to you, pulling your body against his as he stared at the ceiling. Despite how hard he tried to fall asleep, he laid there, wide awake as ever, as his head raced with the tornado of thoughts brewing inside his brain. 
Javier Peña had never really considered himself to be an anxious person. For most of his life, he couldn’t be. For the sake of his job, the sake of his family after his Mom passed, Javi had survived the only way he had known how- Block it out, and ignore it. And so far, that strategy had seemed to bode for him pretty darn well. But that was before he had anyone who depended on him, cared about him, anyone who made his life worth living for. That was before he had met you. Now, Javi found himself at the crossroads of a moment he had been waiting for since the moment he had first laid eyes on you. Something that brought him absolute joy and sheer terror at the same time- Javier Peña was going to propose to you, and he was an anxious fucking mess. 
If that in itself wasn’t enough, things at the Laredo County Sheriff's Department had been an absolute shit show. Mexico was the only thing on anyone’s radar, making for long days and high tension at the office, trying to do anything to slow the spread of the cartel’s influence across the border. Day after day, report after report, it felt like the department was drowning in the endless shitty news of new death tolls, record breaking trafficking stats, and lack of control as cocaine moved across the Rio Grande at a groundbreaking pace. Even though he found himself even further removed from Mexico than he ever was in Colombia, he couldn’t help but feel that painful, searing wrench in his gut when he sat down to really think about it. 
You. 
Spending your lives together.
Having a family.
Protecting his wife and kids. 
The things he would do to keep you safe.
The terrible things he had done he had justified were keeping other people safe. 
The imagines of the things he wish he could unsee.
The pain and hurt he wished he could take back. 
The fear of what he was capable of doing. 
So with a knot in his chest from work, a ring hidden away in his sock drawer, and the beginnings of a plan to ask the woman he loved more than life itself to marry him, Javi coped with the weight of his stress the only way he knew how. He couldn’t fucking sleep. 
The thoughts played in his mind on repeat, torturing him with every loop around his brain. He tried his best to close his eyes, to empty his head for a moment of peace, but no matter how much he wished he could have willed himself to sleep, it was no use. By the time the alarm clock on his nightstand read 2:05 AM, Javi had completely given up on the idea of rest for the night, quietly making his way out of bed to go wander around the living room. It wasn’t long before you too were also awake, rolling over in your sleep to find Javi’s space in the bed cold and empty. Rubbing your eyes and propping yourself up against your pillow, you scanned around the darkness of your room as you came to, realizing that Javi was nowhere to be found.  Draping one of the blankets from your bed over you, you crept into the hallway, greeted by the soft light of one of the living room lamps painting shadows against the wall. 
“Javi, are you up?” Your voice still soft and sleepy, rubbing your hand along your face, squinting from the sudden brightness that lit up the room. 
“Osita, baby, did I wake you up? I'm so sorry. Go back to bed, okay?” Javi shot up from the couch, setting down whatever book he had been half focused on reading as he watched your bed headed figure meander into the living room. 
“No, it’s okay.” You grumbled, holding out your blanket covered arms for Javi to melt his body into yours, wrapping you in a tight hug. You pressed your head into the bare skin of his chest, snaking your hands around his waist as he planted his lips against the the top of your head, burying his nose in your tangled hair. “Baby, what’s going on? Why can’t you sleep? I’m worried about you, Jav.” 
“I’m… Yeah, I’m okay, Hermosa. Just a lot on my mind.” He sighed, his exhale still buried in your hair as he savored the smell of you, still lingering even in your sleepy state. 
His pause alone was enough to know okay wasn’t the word that you would use to describe Javi right now. His words were burdened and fatigued, making it clear that whatever was on his mind was weighing on him more heavily than he wanted to admit. 
“Are you sure? Javi, if you wanna talk about anything, you know I’m always here, right?” 
You wanted so desperately to pry. Everything in you had a feeling that whatever was keeping him up were entangled in the parts of his dark parts past, the last secrets holding up the final wall between the two of you. You knew from your brothers how hard it was to talk about the pain and suffering they had witnessed, and begging them to talk about it before they were ready only seemed to make it worse. Hell, after Patrick died, it felt like you didn’t sleep for weeks, and it had taken you months to open up about it. You knew Javi hurt, and as much as you wanted to, digging deeper into the things that plagued him in his restless nights wasn’t what he needed right now. Right now, he just needed someone to be there for him. 
“Is there anything I can do, Javi? I just wanna help.” The breath of your sympathetic whispers were hot against Javi’s skin, squeezing your arms to pull him as close to you as he could. He paused for a moment, letting out another deep breath as cradled the back of your head with his palm, running his hands through your hair. 
“Will- Will you stay up with me? Just a little bit longer?” His voice trembled as you turned your head to lock your eyes with his, the gentle nod of your head bringing him a moment of relief. 
“Of course, baby. Of course I’ll stay up with you. Do you wanna turn on the TV or put on a movie? Sometimes that helps me sleep.” You stretched your arms over your head, scrunching your face as you yawned before tugging your blanket tighter around your body. 
“Believe me, Hermosa, I know it does.” He let out a soft chuckle as he pressed a soft kiss against your forehead. 
“Oh shit, yeah that is true. I don’t even think I made it halfway through Young Frankenstein tonight, which is a crime. It’s such a good movie. I don’t even remember getting into bed.” You yawned again, this time taking one of your blanket covered fists to try and rub the sleep out of your eyes, forcing yourself to stay awake. 
“Well, if you give a mouse pizza and a movie after a long day at school, then she’ll probably need her boyfriend to carry her to bed because she’s so tired.” Now awake enough, Javi’s cute jab at your costume for school made you let out a little giggle, giving him a little shove with your blanket wrapped body. “Why don’t we turn the rest of it on, so you can finish watching?” 
“I don’t wanna fall asleep on you, Javi.” You grumbled, pouting up at him, considering he had just asked you to stay awake with him. 
“It’s okay. As long as I have you by me, I’ll be alright, I promise.” Reluctantly, you nodded in agreement, plopping yourself on the couch as Javi turned on the TV, rewinding the VHS tape to the point where you had fallen asleep earlier before joining you, draping his arm around your shoulder as you tucked in your knees and scooted closer to him. You sat for a few minutes in silence, letting the sounds of the movie fill the background. As you turned your head to look up at Javi, you could tell that even though his eyes were pointed at the screen, there was no way he was really watching the movie. Reaching up your hand, you ran your fingers across the length of his strong jaw, his stubble scratching against your palm, forcing him to look back at you. Your eyes met his, the sweet, chocolate brown looking back at you, with a confusing mix of exhaustion, guilt, want and helplessness. You brought your face closer to his, your lips now only inches apart as your whispers danced against his mouth, desperate to find something to ease his pain. 
“What do you need, Javi? Whatever you need, I’ll give it to you.” 
His tongue swept against his bottom lip, taking one last shaky breath before his words left his body with his exhale. 
“You. I need you.” 
His hands found their way to the bare skin of your thighs, his fingertips barely brushing against your flesh as he traced his way up to your torso, toying with the hem of one of his shirts that always looked so much better on you than him. Pressing his palm against the soft curves of your stomach, he tugged at the waistband of your sleep shorts, causing you to shift your body so he could slide them down your legs. Reaching over towards his lap, you grasped at his boxers, feeling him already half hard under the fabric as you rubbed your hand against him. Javi held your hips, slowly guiding you to straddle him as you kicked your shorts off your feet, leaving them in a pile on the ground. Slowly, you began to grind deeper into his lap, the feeling of him now fully hard beneath you. Gently prompting you to raise your arms over your head, Javi lifted your shirt, leaving you bare as he dropped it next to your shorts. 
“Is this okay?” Javi rasped, pressing languid kisses against your neck and collarbone as you ran your hands against the width of his broad shoulders. 
“Of course, baby.” Your reply low and horse as you began to drag the fabric of his boxers lower and lower, finally letting his cock spring free as his waistband pushed past. You brought your palm to your mouth, licking a long, wet strip across it before wrapping it around his length, thumbing over the precum already leaking from his tip. Javi tilted his head against the back of the couch as you twisted your wrist, stroking his cock, letting out a hushed moan before sitting back up to watch you. 
“You’re fucking perfect, Osita. I don’t deserve you.” He dug his fingertips into the soft flesh of your ass, his sweet, brown eyes locked on yours as you pressed against him, nibbling at his ear. 
“You deserve everything, Javi. I could give you everything in the world and it still wouldn’t be enough.” Javi grasped at your face, cupping your cheeks as he pressed his lips against yours in a deep, intense kiss, his voice shaky and lustful as his mouth parted with yours before he spoke. 
“I don’t need anything besides you, Osita. Eres mi todo. Estás todo lo que necesito. (You are my everything. You’re all I’ll ever need.) He shuttered, letting out a low groan as you continued to rub your hand along his length, Javi now reaching down to trace lazy circles around your clit before dipping his fingers inside your wet heat. His fullness made you whimper, wrapping tighter around his cock as you stroked him, now bucking your hips against his hand as his fingers curled, bumping against the spongy spot that made you lose control. “Does that feel good, sweet girl? Fuck, you’re so wet. 
“Mhmmmmm.” You gasped, rapidly nodding your head as his digits pulsed inside you, your cunt already drenched, desperate to feel the fullness of his dick, despite the thickness of his fingers. Carefully, you lifted your hips, moving yourself closer to him as you ran your fingers through the soft ends of his sleepy curls. Sitting up on your knees, Javi removed his hand as he watched you hover over him, his palms roaming to your hips as you guided his tip through your folds, collecting your arousal before lining him up with your entrance. His jaw went slack as you lowered down on to him, taking your time as you savored the stretch of every sweet inch until you had bottomed out at his base. 
“Fuckkk, baby.” He mewled, gently guiding his hands against your hips as you dragged yourself up along his length before headfully sinking back down, the tip of his cock bumping against your cervix with each movement. Javi nipped at your neck, trailing hot, wet kisses down your collarbone before stopping at your breasts, flicking this tongue along each of your pebbled nipples as you pushed deeper into his lap, whimpering at his touch. “My sweet girl, always taking me so well, like you were fucking made for me, baby. God, you’re so fucking gorgeous.” Javi pulled you in tighter, caging his chest against yours as his arms wrapped around the small of your back as he rested his face in the crook of your neck. “Fuck, I love you so much, Osita.” His words were desperate and needy against your bare skin, digging your fingers into his dark curls as you swirled your hips around his cock. 
“I love you too, Javi. More than anything.” You moaned as felt Javi shift his weight, thrusting upwards as he buried himself deep inside you. His fullness had you digging your nails into the nape of his neck, your body melting into his with each push and pull against each other. You could feel the all too familiar tingle creeping up your legs and through the base of your spine as Javi’s hand found its way to circle around your clit, already throbbing as the curled hair around his base brushed against your sensitive nerves. The lewd noises of your moans and tangled bodies drowned out the sounds of the TV behind you, practically hearing how wet you were as Javi cock slipped in and out of your heat, his pace pounding as he punched into you. You could feel your walls beginning to tighten around him, arousal pooling in your belly, Javi knowing you were close as you whimpered into the crook of his neck. “Fuck baby, don’t stop- ahhhh- please don’t stop, I’m so close.” 
“I know, baby, I know. Let go for me, Osita. Wanna feel you soak my lap before I fuck you full of me. Cum for me baby, it’s okay, I’ve got you.” Javi’s fingers rubbed faster along your clit as you rolled your hips, sinking yourself deeper onto his cock with each thrust, your vision going white as you could feel yourself come undone. 
“Javi, Javi- fuck- Javi, Jav-ahhhhhh.” You could feel yourself gush around him, crying out his name as you reached your high, your legs shaking and fingers digging into his skin, pleasure flowing through your veins. 
“That’s it, Hermosa. Fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum too, fuck myself so deep inside you. My perfect girl. Mierda- Quiero que seas mío para siempre, mi amor. Solo tú, por siempre y para siempre. (Shit- I want you to be mine forever, my love. Only you, forever and always). Fuck me, I- fuckkkk.” Javi hissed as he buried himself deep in your hilt, spilling every drop of his spend against your walls. You could feel the mixture of the both of you dripping down your thighs, soaking Javi’s lap as you slumped into his body, your heart racing as the damp curls of his hair pressed against your shoulder. You both sat there for a moment, letting your chests rise and fall together in sync as you came to. “Fuck me, Osita. I could stay like this forever, baby.”
“You and me both. Although, I feel like that would make things awfully inconvenient for the both of us.” Your soft, sleepy giggles making Javi smile as he ran his fingers though the twisted ends of your hair. Carefully, you lifted yourself up, hissing at the loss of Javi inside you. 
“Thank you, Osita.” Javi whispered, tenderly circling his thumb along your jaw as you curled up next to him. 
“For what?” 
“Just- fuck, you’re so good to me. I don’t know what I’d do without you. So, I just- thank you. Thank you for being everything I need.” Planting a gentle kiss on your forehead, Javi pulled you tighter, holding you in his arms as you leaned against him. 
“I’ll always be here for you, Javi. I promise.” 
You hoped he knew. That he knew your words were true. That when the time came for him to open up to you, letting you into the painful past that loomed above him, that you wouldn’t run. You would be right by his side, just as you were right now. 
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“Well good morning, Sleeping Beauty.” Javi chuckled as you twisted in the passenger seat, stretching your arms over your head, scrunching your face, letting out a lengthy yawn. 
“Fuck, how long was I asleep for? How much longer do we have left? Sorry, I wasn’t planning on sleeping that long, I just wanted to take a nap for a little while we drove.” You ran your hands over your face, looking out at the bright Texas sun shining over the neat suburban neighborhood you now found yourself driving through. Javi reached over across the center console, rubbing his hand along your thigh as he chuckled to himself. 
“Baby, I knew from the moment you fell asleep you were gonna be out for the rest of the drive, it’s okay. I was just worried I was gonna have to wake you up in the Murphy’s driveway.” You grumbled as you looked over at Javi, giving him a playful swat against his arm, shaking your head, now emerging from your post nap fog. 
“Well if we weren't up fucking at 2:30 in the morning, perhaps I wouldn’t be so tired, hmmmm?” 
Javi rolled his eyes as you poked fun at how the both of you had found yourselves last night, trying to ease Javi’s sleeplessness. While your solution had worked enough to ease him back to bed, it had now left you wide awake, wondering what had been going through Javi’s head, torturing him enough to keep him up. It had also meant that the two of you had slept in much longer than you intended, leaving later than planned for Steve and Connie’s. The two of you had quickly packed your things and hit the road, stopping to grab lunch on the way before you found yourself dead asleep next to Javi for the last hour and a half of your journey to San Antonio. With only a few minutes now left in your drive, you peered out the window, admiring the houses that lined the quiet streets of the Murphy’s neighborhood. 
“This is a cute subdivision.” You smiled over at Javi, admiring the houses, charming and inviting as they were freshly decorated from Halloween. 
“Yeah, it is pretty nice.” He grinned back, wrapping his palm around your thigh, giving your leg a little squeeze. He took a deep breath, his voice now shifting in tone, becoming more shaky and nervous. “Would you uh- would you, um, wanna live in a neighborhood like this?” 
“Maybe. I don’t know, the houses are all really close together. I spent so much of my life in the city, and even at my house growing up, everything always felt so cramped. After coming here, especially after seeing your ranch, I don’t know, I would love to be somewhere with more space. But that’s a big ask, so, maybe one day if it works out, I guess.” You reached over, rubbing your hand along Javi’s arm, your soft smile meeting his tender gaze as he smirked, nodding to himself. 
“Yeah, one day.” 
Taking a last turn down one of the neighborhood streets, the two of you pulled up to the quaint two story home belonging to the Murphy’s. Turning off the ignition, Javi paused for a moment, grinning to himself as he ran the hand resting on your leg up to your face, cupping your check as his eyes roamed the length of your body, taking every inch of you in as his sweet brown eyes consumed you. “I love you, Osita.”  
“I love you too, Jav.” Both of your heads tilted, your lips gently pressing against one anothers as you traced your hand through Javi’s dark curls, pulling him closer into you. You could feel his smile against your mouth as his tongue barely swiped against your bottom lip, the two of you so lost in the moment, you hadn’t even seen Steve make his way out of the house to greet you, let alone the fact that he was now standing at the driver’s side door, hands on his hips as he watched your impromptu makeout session in Javi’s truck. 
“You two lovebirds want help bringin’ your bags in, or do I need to give you a minute?” Steve chuckled to himself as you and Javi shot up, hearts racing and faces going white hearing his distinct drawl and rapid tapping at the driver’s side window. Taking a deep breath to compose himself, Javi placed one more soft kiss on your forehead before promptly turning around to flip off Steve and opening the driver’s side door. “You two are worse than a pair of horny teenagers, I swear.” You could hear Steve still snickering to himself as you exited out your side of the car, making your way over to find Javi and Steve in a tight hug, lovingly patting each other on the back. 
“Fuck off, Murph.” Javi shook his head against Steve’s embrace, pulling away to grab your two bags from the backseat. 
“Listen, I’m not the one makin’ out in my driveway.” Steve shrugged as you sheepishly emerged from your side of the truck, smiling at you as grimaced at him. 
“He started it…” You glanced over at Javi, you and Steve now both giggling as he pulled you in for a hug. 
“Of course he did, wouldn’t put anything past this old bastard. How ya doin’ sweetheart? Good to see the both of you, we’re really glad you guys could make it. 
“She’s doing great after the hour and a half nap she took on the way here.” Javi interjected, slamming the truck door behind him, slinging both of your bags over his shoulder. 
“Whatever, you meanie. In my defense, I was not planning to sleep that long, and I think Halloween exhaustion got the best of me.” You shot Javi a quick wink, trying to bite down on your lip before turning back to face Steve. 
“Listen, I don’t blame ya. I’m fuckin’ exhausted after trick-or-treating with 3 kids, let alone tryin’ to keep ‘em wrangled at school all day. I love those girls, but I don’t think I could've gotten them in my parents car fast enough when they came to pick ‘em up this morning. Here, come on in, I won’t make you stand out in the driveway all day, unless you need to make out more.” 
As you stepped into the Murphy home, you were greeted by an abundance of Halloween streamers and banners hanging in the living room and up the stairwell to the second floor, along with a few Barbie dolls and accessories scattered across the entryway, nearly stepping on one as you came through the door. You could smell the sweet scent of something baking in the kitchen as Connie came rushing through the hallway, arms outstretched to greet you and Javi. “Oh it’s so good to see you two, thank you so much for coming!” Connie squeezed you and Javi in a tight hug before she backed away, kicking one of the toys on the floor across the room. “Sorry about the Barbies, I told the girls to clean up before they left for their grandparents this morning but I think all 3 of them are still running on a sugar high from last night and that obviously didn’t happen.” 
“Thank you so much for having us! Don’t worry about it at all, I totally understand! Javi was just telling me on the way over how much he was hoping the girls had Barbies he could play with anyways!” The 3 of you laughed as Javi rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest as you gave him a smirk and a little nudge. 
“Fuck, I forgot how funny she was Jav.” Steve snickered to himself, picking up one of the Barbies and tossing it across the room into one of the toy baskets along the wall. “Seriously though, we are really glad you guys could make it. Your birthday party was fun as hell, old man. Glad to be close enough to actually see each other and do stuff like this again.” 
Before Javi would respond, you all jumped, startled by the sound of the kitchen timer beeping rapidly from the other room. “Oh crap, sorry, I gotta grab the cupcakes out of the oven!” Connie grimaced apologetically, making her way back to the kitchen. 
“Do you need any help?” You asked, excited to spend more time with Connie. 
“Oh my gosh actually if you could help with frosting the cupcakes that would be amazing. I made these yesterday for Olivia and Abby’s class parties, and I had no idea it was gonna take so long and was worried I wasn’t going to have enough time for all of them before the party! Thank you!” 
“Of course!” You replied, grinning at her before following her lead to the kitchen, giving a little wave as you disappeared around the hall, looking back at Steve and Javi. “Have fun, you two.” 
Steve paused for a moment until the both of you were out of sight, waiting to forcefully slap his hand against Javi’s chest, making him groan from the unexpected pain. 
“What the fuck was that for, you jackass?” Javi winced, glaring at Steve. 
“Where the fuck’s the ring, man?! Steve hissed through gritted teeth, looking back at Javi in disappointment. “I thought you were gonna fuckin’ do it after you got back from Chicago and met her family?! I thought everything was all good with- oh shit, did something happen with the ho-” 
“Shhhhhh! You fuckin’ idiot, please, talk louder, I don’t think the people at the end of the street could hear you.” Javi looked around the corner, clenching his jaw, praying that you hadn’t heard anything from the kitchen. 
“I’m not that fuckin’ loud… Shit, what the fuck happened then?” Steve grumbled, looking over at Javi with concern. 
“Can we maybe talk about proposal plans somewhere that’s not right by the woman I’m trying to propose to?” Running his thumb over his balled fists, Javi’s eyes darted back and forth, staying on the lookout for your return. 
“Fine, fine, fine. I’ll show you where the guest room is and then you can tell me.” Steve motioned up the stairs, Javi trailing behind with both your bags draped around his shoulders
“Was I really that fuckin’ loud?” 
“…Have you heard yourself talk?” 
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“So how’s everything been going at work? There definitely was a full moon sometime in the past week because things were crazy at the hospital, I’m sure they had to be equally as bad at an elementary school.” You and Connie giggled as you squeezed a dollop of orange frosting onto one of the cupcakes before taking one of the little bags to pipe on eyes and a mouth to make it look like a pumpkin. 
“Oh my god, I think it must have been on Wednesday, I had a boy cut another girl’s hair with scissors and then had to call another parent because her daughter bit another kid at recess pretending to play werewolves. I felt really bad we didn’t come last night, I was exhausted after our Halloween party, I fell asleep on poor Javi at like, 8 o’clock.” 
Although you found yourself laughing with Connie again, you couldn’t help but shake the uncomfortable feeling you had in your gut as you thought about after you had woken up in the middle of the night to find Javi wide awake and distressed. You carefully set down your spatula, taking a deep breath before glancing over at Connie, still frosting next to you. “Hey, uh, Connie? Can, um- Can I ask you something?” Connie immediately sensed the shift in your tone, putting down her cupcake. 
“Of course, honey. What’s going on?” 
“Did um, did- Did Steve ever- ever talk to you? About all the stuff that happened in Colombia? I mean like, I know you were there, but I don’t know. Sorry, I don’t know what I’m trying to ask, this is probably way too personal, I-” You could feel yourself shrinking, retracting in embarrassment at your overly intrusive question, unable to finish your thought before Connie cut you off, placing her hand on your shoulder. 
“Oh, honey…” Her eyes were filled with sympathy as they looked back at yours, letting out a sigh before she responded. “Did something happen?” You began to nod your head no, even though you could feel the words yes burning in your throat. You took another shaky breath, trying to hold back the tears now welling in your eyes as you spoke. 
“No I mean- well, yeah, I guess. Last night, I woke up and Javi wasn’t in bed. He was out in the living room and I could tell that something was bothering him. I don’t know- maybe it was nothing. I just- when my brothers came back from active duty, there were a lot of things that kind of just went unspoken. I knew it was hard for them to talk about. Charlie handled it okay, but my brother Patrick never wanted to talk to anyone about what happened, and it just- I don’t know Connie, I don’t think Javi would ever do anything stupid like he did, but- fuck- it scares me sometimes. I know Javi’s done things that he’s probably not proud of, and I get it’s part of the nature of what his job was. I don’t care. I really don’t. People do shitty things when they’re put in shitty situations. But he never talks about it. Ever. Does… Does he not trust me? I care about him so much, Con. More than anything. I get so worried about him.” 
Your tears were now streaming down your cheeks, leaving your face wet as you wiped the back of your hand across your skin to try and do some form of damage control before Connie embraced you, pulling you in for a hug, tightly wrapping her arms around you. “Oh sweetheart. Of course he trusts you. When Steve came back, he was a mess. I don’t think it really all hit him until he was finally home. I guess you’re right, it was different because I was there, but even then, there were things that happened that I didn’t know about. After begging and begging him, I finally got him to go to see someone and it really helped, but even now, there’s times where it still creeps up on him. Honey, Javi loves you so much. I didn’t think I’d ever live to see the day he was in love as he is with you. If he’s anything like Steve, he just doesn't wanna hurt you.” 
You sniffled, taking a step back to wipe your nose with your sleeve, your lip trembling as you tried to keep from crying harder than you already were. “But that’s what hurts, Connie. It hurts me to think he has to keep this from me, like I’m gonna think less of him for what he’s been through.” 
“I know. Have you talked to him about it?” Connie’s voice was gentle and sweet, rubbing her hand along your arm as she listened to what you needed to get off your chest. 
“No… I guess I should have. I never wanted to pry. I know it’s hard to talk about, I just- I wanna be there for him Connie. I don’t want him to have to do it all on his own.” You shifted your gaze to the ground, guilt washing over you. After Patrick, you couldn’t live with the idea of letting Javi try to suffer through his past alone. You loved him more than anything- and even the slightest thought of going through anything similar to what had happened to Patrick again with Javi was almost paralyzing. 
“I think the best thing you can do is to go talk to him.” Looking back up, you saw Connie smiling at you, trying to convince you that everything would be okay, even if it felt like it wasn’t. “Why don’t you go find him? Party’s starting soon anyways, you can go change into your costumes and come down wherever you’re ready. I’ll be just fine with the cupcakes, tell Steve can put himself to work frosting.” The both of you grinned as you tried to wipe your tears, nodding slowly in agreement. 
“Thanks, Connie.” You whispered into her shoulder as you pulled her in for a hug before heading up the stairs to find where Javi and Steve had gone. It didn’t take you long to find the pair, hearing their voices carry through the hallway from the slightly cracked door of the guest bedroom. You were about to knock and interrupt their conversation, stopping yourself with your fist barely touching the door as you tried to make out what they were talking about. 
“The offer was in fucking cash, too. I was trying to make it easier so I could speed up the process, but it’s been taking them so goddamn long to close on everything so I can finally go sign the fucking paperwork.” 
“That fuckin’ blows, Jav. I’m sorry. It’s not like she knows any better, though. It’ll still be a huge fuckin’ surprise, I’ll tell you that much.” 
“I know. It’s been killing me to wait this long. I just want it to be perfect, Steve. She deserves everything. Honestly, I’m kinda glad it bought me some more time. I need to find a way to get her to see it before everything’s official in case she fucking hates it.” 
“Javi. She’s not gonna hate it. Fuck it, tell her Connie and I are lookin’ for somethin’ and we wanted you two to go see it for us. I don’t know, maybe that’s too obvious. Speakin’ of which, I should probably go check to see if she needs anything before this party, I’m already in the fuckin’ dog house for forgettin’ to bring the girl’s trick-or-treatin’ bags to school, I don’t need to be in trouble for anything else.” 
What the hell were they talking about? What was Javi signing? Why was it taking so long? What the hell did it have to do with you? Wait… holy fuck. No way… Was he- 
Before you could finish your thought, you suddenly realized Steve was making his way towards the door. You quickly rapped your fist against the wood, trying to play off the fact you had been eavesdropping and make it look like you had just unassumingly made your way upstairs, not overhearing the conversation the two were just having. 
Knock, knock. 
“Hey, it’s me! Uh, Steve, Con wants to know if you can help her with the cupcakes really quick.” You pushed open the door, trying your best to smile at the suspicious pair as Steve shook his head, looking back at Javi. 
“It’s always fuckin’ somethin’. I don’t even know what I did wrong this time, I swear.” Steve held up his hands defensively, sliding his way past you in the doorway before heading downstairs, leaving you standing there awkwardly, unsure how to feel after your conversation with Connie and the one you had just overheard. 
“Hey, Osita. How’s everything goin’ down there? Sorry, we were just about to come down and- Hey, baby, you okay?” Javi stood up, concern spreading across his face from the strange scrunch in your brow as you stared at the floor. 
“Ummmm…” You froze for a moment, unsure of what to do. On the one hand, your conversation with Connie had you ready to confront Javi, to finally work up the courage to ask him about the past life he had tried his best to keep from you. But as you glanced over at him, seeing his sweet brown eyes and stupidly handsome face, remembering the discussion you had just overheard through the doorway, the other hand meant you weren’t at risk of ruining your night that the two of you had been so looking forward to, and right now, the other hand was going to have to be the one you needed to play. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good, I just- I was gonna ask you something but forgot what I was gonna say. I’m sure I’ll remember it eventually.” You smiled at Javi, neither of you completely convinced by your response. “But um, Connie said that people are gonna start getting here soon, so we can change into our costumes if you want.” A smirk slowly stretched across your cheeks as you nodded over to the black duffle bags laying on the bed. 
Javi’s grin matched yours quickly, grabbing your hips and pulling you closer against him as you giggled. “You sure we’re not gonna be the only ones dressed up?” 
“Well considering it’s a Halloween party and I literally just talked to Connie about what she and Steve are wearing downstairs, I’m gonna give it a pretty confident yes. Worst case, it just looks like you’re wearing a white shirt and vest, Mr. Solo. You stuck up, half-witted, scruffy looking nerf herder.” You raised your eyebrows, playfully poking at his chest. Javi paused, shaking his head at your quote, firing one right back at you as he bit down on his lip. 
“You just like me because I’m a scoundrel. There aren’t enough scoundrels in your life.” 
“I happen to like nice men.” 
“I am a nice man.”  
Javi cupped your face, pulling you in for a long, heavy kiss before backing away to unpack your bags, shooting you a quick wink as you rolled your eyes. Jesus, he even found a way to make Star Wars sexy. Just when you thought you couldn’t be anymore in love, Javier Peña never failed to find a way to make you realize you’d never stop falling for him. 
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After putting in what felt like the 74th bobby pin into your hair after getting the last braid wrapped over your head, you gave yourself a once over in the mirror, pleasantly surprised by how well your costume had turned out. While Javi was disappointed you were adamant you were not going as Princess Leia from Return of the Jedi and showing up in front of a group of strangers at Steve and Connie’s party in her slave costume, you and Javi both agreed that Hoth Princess Leia was definitely the next best look. Staring at you with his puppy dog eyes, Javi had been adamant about waiting with you as you finished getting ready, leaning his hip against the bathroom counter, arms crossed over his chest as he watched you finish the last of your hair and makeup. 
“Okay, I think that should stay. All those years of braiding my hair for under my hockey helmet are finally coming in handy for something.” You snickered, pushing the final clip into your hair to hold it into place, giving yourself a once over in the mirror. As you looked yourself down, Javi’s eyes wandered up and down your body just as fast, practically undressing you as fast as you had put your costume on. 
“Goddamn, Osita… Fuck, you’re so hot.” 
“Me? Jesus Christ, Javi. You put Harrison Ford to shame with how fucking good you look. I like Han Solo better with a mustache anyways.” You licked your tongue against your bottom lip, running your hands along the muscles of his arms, straining against the tight henley shirt he was wearing under his vest. You were no better than Javi, practically having to force yourself to not look in his general direction while you were getting ready to prevent yourself from pouncing on him. But given the lack of chatter downstairs, and the impressive speed at which the two of you had gotten ready, you really couldn’t help yourself. Slowly, you let your hands begin to slip down his arms and across his chest, palming at the denim of his black jeans as he let out a deep groan. 
“Hermosa…” He hissed against your neck as you grasped at the bulge now growing under his pants, your other hand now making its way down to undo his belt, the clinking of the metal drowned out by Javi’s heavy panting. You began lowering your body, sliding Javi’s pants and boxers down his thighs as his cock sprang free, his tip already red and leaking with precum. You rested on your knees, face to face with his length as you wrapped your hand around him, slowly stroking him a few times. 
“This okay, Captain Solo?” You batted your lashes at him, giving him a wink before letting your spit dribble onto his cock, taking his tip into your mouth and swirling your tongue around it. Curling your fingers around his base, you began to twist your wrist, hollowing out your cheeks as you took him deeper into your mouth. 
“Oh, fuck me. Holy shit, Osita.” He moaned, tilting his head back, letting his jaw go slack as your head bobbed back and forth. He gently rested his hand along the side of your face, helping to guide you along his length as you took him deeper and deeper down your throat. “Jesus Christ, baby. Fuck, that feels so good. You look so hot, god fuckin’ dammit.” Javi’s words were labored and shaky as you started to increase your pace, wrapping your free hand around the back of his bare thigh, digging your fingertips into his leg. Feeling the pressure beginning to build in his stomach, Javi began rocking his hips, his jaw completely slack as he looked down at the sight of how well you took him in your mouth, saliva dribbling down your chin as sucked along his cock, hard and heavy on your tongue. “Fuck, Osita. I’m not gonna last much longer. Can I cum like this, baby? Fill up that- fuck- fill up that pretty little mouth of yours?”” 
You glanced up at him, nodding, your lips still wrapped around his dick, the motions of your head and wrist now becoming faster and sloppier as you watched Javi’s brow scrunch and jaw clench, a sign you knew all too well that he was moments away from coming undone. 
“Such a good fucking girl, taking me so well. Fuck, baby- shit- se sientes tan bien, estoy tan cercaaahhhhhh-” (you feel so good, I’m so closeeeee-). The hot ropes of his spend coated the back of your throat, the salty, tangy mix filling your mouth as Javi whined, giving his hips one last push as kept your lips wrapped around him, making sure that you had milked him of every last drop before releasing. Letting your spit and his release fall from the corners of your lips, you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, smirking up at Javi’s blissed out expression. “Jesus Christ, Osita. You’re too fucking good at that. Holy shit. Lemme take care of-“ 
You held up your hand to stop him as you stood up, your gesture cutting off the rest of his sentence as you helped to pull up his jeans and boxers still resting along his thighs. “I’m allowed to give my hot ass boyfriend blowjobs without anything in return. C’mon, we better get downstairs before Steve walks in on us again.” You pressed up on your tiptoes, planting a quick kiss on Javi’s lips as he reached down to buckle his belt before the two of you tried your best to fix yourself up in the mirror to avoid the inevitable shit Steve was about to give the both of you. Giving Javi a quick nod in the mirror before turning off the light and heading out the door, he gave your ass a playful smack, making you squeal in surprise, making you turn on your heels. Resting his hand on his hip, he beamed at you, biting down on his lip. 
“Fuck, I love you.” 
“I know.” 
The Murphy’s living room had begun to pool with guests as you made your way down the stairs, looking for Steve and Connie amongst the crowd. You and Javi both grabbed a beer from the cooler at the bottom of the stairwell, quickly turning around as you heard Steve’s familiar twang approaching behind you. 
“Well I’ll be damned. You got this motherfucker in a costume? He must really love you.” Steve chuckled, shaking Javi by the shoulders. “And Star Wars too?! You asshole, how many times did I try to tell you they were good fuckin’ movies?! You shoulda dressed him up like Jabba the Hut.” You and Steve cackled as Javi rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, and what the fuck are you supposed to be? A sad pirate?” Javi jabbed, poking fun at Steve’s poorly put together costume. 
“Listen, Olivia and Abby both wanted to be the Little Mermaid, so we had two Ariel’s, Con was Ursula, Madison was the yellow fish and I didn’t wanna be that annoying ass crab, so pirate it was, asshole.” Steve retorted, punching at Javi’s arm, the two of them laughing at each other like little boys. “Alright, go enjoy yourselves lovebirds, I’ll see ya in a little bit. And Javi?”
“Yeah Murph?” 
“You really gotta start checkin’ your pants, buddy.” 
Javi’s cheeks turned red, his eyes darting down to his zipper, still all the way undone from your activities upstairs, the both of you grimacing at each other, sheepishly avoiding eye contact with Steve as he disappeared into the crowd. 
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It really wasn’t a surprise to Javi how many friends the Murphy’s had already managed to make in their time since moving to San Antonio. Their house was quickly crowded with all sorts of people- Steve and Connie’s co-workers, neighbors, parents of friends Olivia and Abby had made at school, regardless of where the party goers were from, everyone had collectively agreed to make adult Halloween just as fun as any kids. You and Javi were having a great time catching up with Steve and Connie, as well as meeting some of their other close friends, one of Connie’s neighbors being an elementary school teacher, giving you two plenty to commiserate about from the hellish week it had been. It didn’t take long for the party to move outside, Steve drunkenly deciding that he needed to make a bonfire, despite adamant argument that with the amount of alcohol Steve had in his system, he was going to spontaneously combust if he got close enough to a flame. Javi, sober enough to still help his friend make rational decisions, was glad that Steve was happy to let him build the bonfire. 
“The force is strong with you, Han Solo.” You giggled, Javi wrapping his arm around your shoulder, pressing a soft kiss into your forehead as the two of you stared into the flickering orange glow of the fire pit. 
“Not strong enough to extinguish Steve if he got close enough to it. Hey, I got shit all over my hands, I’m gonna go to the bathroom and wash ‘em off. You need anything while I’m inside, Princess?” You smiled as you nudged Javi at the nickname he had been adamant about using since you had put on your costume. 
“I’m good, thank you. I’m gonna go wait over on the swingset so I don’t completely reek of bonfire later.” Javi nodded as he slid his hand down your back, giving your ass a quick squeeze before making his way through the crowd, heading towards the house. Surprised no one else had capitalized on the chance to sit down, you wandered over to the wooden playset at the corner of the Murphy’s backyard, taking a seat on one of the plastic swings, kicking your feet against the grass below. 
“Hey, there she is! How goes it, Leia?” Taking a few long strides through the yard, Steve was now quickly making his way over to you, stumbling over his own feet as he somehow managed to sit himself down on the swing next to you. You tried your best not to laugh at Steve’s drunken state, but his current antics weren’t making it very easy on you. 
“I could ask the same to you. You doin’ okay there, pirate?” 
“Fuck sweetheart, I’m doin’ fuckin’ great. Where’s the asshole?” 
“Inside, I’m sure he’ll be back out soon.” You snickered at Steve watching the beer dribble down his chin from the overly confident swig he had taken. 
“Good, I don’t need ‘em right now. You were the one I was lookin’ for.” Steve pointed in your general direction, but clearly wasn’t aware enough to hit his target head on. 
“Me?” You laughed, pointing back to yourself. 
“Yes, you. You talk to him yet?”
“About?” You paused, wondering if Steve had any inkling of the conversation you were planning to have earlier, or if he was drunkenly deciding you and Javi needed to discuss something else. 
“You know about what. I talked to Connie earlier. I figured I owed it to you to come talk to you about it, too.” 
Your heart began to race, that uncomfortable feeling once again beginning to churn in your stomach as you thought about the things you and Connie had discussed earlier. “Steve, you don’t owe me anything, I-” 
“No, I do. Hold on a second.” Steve turned away, letting out a hearty burp, pouding on his chest before facing back towards you. “Sorry, I’ve been holdin’ that in for like 10 minutes, I needed to let it out. Anyways… What was I sayin’? Oh shit, yeah, the grumpy bastard. Listen, sweetheart. I know it’s gonna fuckin’ suck,  but you gotta be the one to bring it up and talk to him about it. If I know anything about that motherfucker, it’s that he will bottle things up for way too fuckin’ long until someone gets it out of him. He’s a good guy. He says he’s not, but he is. Saved my ass more times than I can count. That job made us do some fucked up shit neither of us are fuckin’ proud of. But that doesn’t mean he gets to keep it from you. I swear to God, that asshole is so fuckin’ in love with you, it makes me sick. You make him so happy. He just doesn’t wanna fuck up the best thing that’s ever happened to him.” 
You weren’t sure if it was the right thing to do, but in that moment, all you could manage was to reach over to the swing next to you, pulling Steve in for a hug as you tried to keep your tears from staining his shirt. “Thanks, Steve.” You whispered, leaning back into your seat, using your sleeve to wipe the wetness from your cheeks. 
“I know you love him too. You deserve to know. Don’t let him be a stubborn jackass to you, okay? I’m bein’ serious. I should be the one thankin’ you though, honey. In all the years I’ve known him, I never thought I’d see ‘em this happy. I promise I won’t get this drunk at your wedding.” Steve winked, straining to push himself up out of the swing, somehow managing to catch his balance as he stumbled into the grass. 
“You do make a very inspirational drunk, Steve.” You laughed to yourself, looking up at him with a genuine smile. “Thank you.” 
“You’re welcome. Alright, enough sap, I’m gonna go get another fuckin’ beer, I’ll see ya around okay?” 
“Okay, maybe a water would be good for you, too.” 
“Water’s for pussies.” 
“Water’s good for people who don’t want raging hangovers tomorrow.” 
“Pirates are always drunk, so I’ll be fuckin’ fine.” 
“Whatever you say, Steve.” 
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It didn’t take long for Javi to return, easily spotting his tall, broad body making his way through the crowd, beaming at you as he walked over to the swings. You tried your best to smile back at him with the uneasy pounding in your chest quickly building, feeling your heartbeat in your throat. “Hey, Hermosa. Sorry it took so long, I ended up stopping to get another drink on the-“ 
“Do- Javi, do you trust me?” 
Your words were quiet and blunt as they rolled off your tongue, your eyes peeled on your feet kicking through the grass beneath you. 
Javi’s brow immediately scrunched in confusion, completely off put by your question and demeanor. “Do I- Baby, what are you talking about? Of course I trust you? What’s going on?” Setting down his drink, he began making his way next to you in frantic, worried strides. 
“Then why won’t you talk to me about it?” Your eyes darted from the ground up to his, his sweet brown eyes swirling with confusion at the firm tone of your voice and desperation growing across your face. 
“Talk to you about what? Hermosa, what’s going on? Is everything ok-” 
“Why won’t you talk to me about Colombia?” 
 Javi took a step back. He wasn’t sure if it was out of defense, or absolute shock from the words that had just fallen out of your mouth. He stared at you for a moment, his jaw locking as you could see how hard he swallowed, trying to bide his time as he calculated his response. 
“Osita… It’s not that simple.” 
“That’s not an answer.” 
“I don’t understand why we’re talking about this. Baby, if this is because of last night, you don’t need to worry about me, can we please just drop it?” The two of you faced each other in an unspoken standoff, Javi’s hands now resting on his hips as you crossed your arms over your chest. You had tried so hard to be patient, but in the moment, it was like all of your frustration was beginning to boil over. 
“That’s exactly why we’re talking about this, Javi. Because I fucking worry about you. All the time. I’ve tried so hard to be patient. I’ve never, ever tried to get you to talk about it because I know it’s fucking hard. But last night, you’re up at 2 A.M, wandering around the apartment, and I’m begging you to tell me what’s wrong and you won’t fucking do it. I’m not an idiot, Javi. I can’t live in this weird in between space in your life where you pretend your past doesn’t exist when I know it still fucking haunts you. Why won’t you just talk to me about it?” 
Javi could feel his heart pounding in his chest, his palms sweating as they clenched in tight fists at his sides. He tried so desperately to find an answer, something, anything he could tell you to try and justify his choices. The choices he had kept from you. The choices he couldn’t forgive himself for. “Because, I- fuck- because, goddamnit, I just- I was a terrible fucking person, okay? The things I did, they were-” 
“What? Fucked up? Painful? Shitty? Of course they fucking were, Javi. You were literally in Colombia chasing down Pablo Fucking Escobar. What did you think I thought you were doing down there? Filing away paperwork? You don’t think I know that you did things you regret? That you’ve hurt people? Made choices that hurt innocent people who didn’t deserve it? I know Javi, I fucking know. I watched my brothers come back from the same goddamn thing. I tried so hard to give them space, to let them come to terms with the fucked up things they did on their own, and you know what fucking happened? One of them’s fucking dead because of it. I can’t let it happen again. I don’t care about what you did. It doesn’t make you a bad person. But you can’t try and hide it from me and pretend like it doesn’t exist. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. But I can’t if you don’t trust me. Please trust me. Please. I love you so much, Javi. I can’t lose you.” 
Javi stood in silence, as the both of you fought the tears streaming down your cheeks. He wasn’t sure if he had just been hit in the gut with a giant sucker punch, or if the weight of the world had just been lifted off his shoulders. He truly didn’t know how to feel. He wasn’t even sure if he had heard you correctly. Did you really just tell him that you knew about the fucked up, terrible things he had done and that you didn’t care? That you still fucking loved him? All you wanted was for him to trust that you wanted to be there for him? He could feel his hands trembling and lip quivering as he tried to find the words to speak.
 “Osita… I- fuck, baby. Osita, I’m so sorry. I trust you with my fucking life. You- You don’t deserve to have to deal with with all the fucked up things I’ve done. I don’t wanna scare you away, baby. You’re the best thing that’s ever fucking happened to me and I was so terrified if you found out about the terrible person I used to be, you’d leave. It’s not fair to you, I can’t expect you to carry the weight of all the fucking things I’ve done, too. I’m so sorry.” Quietly, Javi sat down next to you on the empty swing, burying his hands in his face. Gently, you reached over, pulling his hands away, forcing him to look at you. 
“Whatever you tell me isn’t gonna scare me away. I promise. The only thing that’s gonna scare me is when you try to pretend you’re okay when you’re not. Javi… Javi, I just- I just wanna be there for you. I don’t want you to have to do it alone. I’d do anything for you. I trust you more than anyone. You’re my best friend. I just- fuck- I just want you to trust that I’ll always be there for you to. I promise.” 
And just like that, the last brick holding up the wall between you and Javier Peña collapsed. There was nothing left to run from. Nothing left to hide. After he returned home, he was a changed man. He had hated the person he had become. Maybe there was a part of him that didn’t want to be loved, because he didn’t believe that he deserved to be. But then, there was you. 
You. 
You had taken everything he had known and changed his life for the better. You had become his better half, the person he loved more than anyone in the world. You had proved he was worthy of more than just existing- you had proved to Javi that he was worth the love and happiness you had promised him from the moment you had come into his life and made it worth living for. 
“You promise?” 
“I promise. Always.” 
The way Javi grabbed you and wrapped you in his arms, grasping at the back of your shirt as he pulled you in tighter, feeling the hot breath of his silent sobs against your shoulder told you everything you needed to know. You didn’t know much, but if there was one thing you did know, it was that you loved Javier Peña more than life itself. As quickly as it had felt like your life had fallen apart, he had come into it and picked up the broken pieces to put it back together. And on an October night in San Antonio, sitting on an old wooden swing set in the Murphy’s backyard, you hoped that Javi knew that you would always be there to pick up the shattered parts of his past, too. 
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You weren’t sure how many hours had passed as you sat hand in hand in the swings with Javi as you listened to anything and everything he had to say. Long after the backyard was empty, and the bonfire had faded to embers and ashes, and the only one left awake besides the two of you was Connie, trying to drag Steve back inside from the plastic lawn chair he had passed out on, you finally made your way up to bed for the best sleep the two of you had in a very, very long time. Your goodbyes to the Murphy’s had been short and sweet- Connie exhausted from the late night, and Steve barley coherent from how hungover he was, you were still both so thankful the two of you had made the journey out to see them, and the both of you, just as grateful for the sweet and supportive life long friends you knew the Murphy’s would become. Most of your drive back to Laredo was spent in a comfortable silence, the golden sunrise spilling through the windows of Javi’s truck as you cruised down the highway, Javi’s hand never leaving yours, your fingers intertwined together as his thumb gently rubbed against your soft skin and your head rested against his broad shoulder. 
“How are you feeling about seeing your mom today?” You asked, lightly squeezing his arm as you smiled up at him, now exiting off the freeway quickly approaching the cemetery where you planned to meet Chucho to celebrate Día De Los Muertos, trying your best to comfort Javi as he prepared to see his mom’s gravesite for the first time since her funeral almost a decade ago. Javi let out a quiet sigh, his grip tightening just a little tighter around your hand as he looked over at you, a surprisingly calm look flooding his face. 
“I’m actually doing okay. Better than I would have thought. I think I was always so worried that she wouldn’t be proud of me and the man I’d become after she was gone. I um- I finally think that she’d be proud of me now.” He glanced over at you, his smile soft and tender as he soaked in the reason for his pride sitting right beside him. 
You noticed Chucho’s truck as you pulled up to park along the edge of the small cemetery, Chucho excitedly waving you down as you both hopped out of the car. Walking around to Javi, you were quick to grab his hand, giving him a reassuring grip as the two of you made your way through the gravestones along the thin cobblestone path towards Chucho, already arranging the items he had collected for Lucia’s ofrenda. 
“Hola, niños.” Chucho grinned, wrapping his arms around the both of you. “I’m so glad you’re here.” 
“Thanks for letting me be a part of today, Chucho. I know… Well, I just- I’m really honored to- just, thank you.” Chucho wasted no time pulling you into your own hug, his rough and worn hands holding you by the shoulders as he looked at you with misty eyes. 
“Mija, I should be thanking you. If it wasn’t for you, I don’t know if we would all be here today. Lucia’s last wish to me was that I would promise to make sure Javier was happy. Now hija, I think my sweet Lucia can rest a little easier knowing someone else has already fulfilled my promise for me.” As the two of you spoke, you hadn’t noticed as Javi had quietly stepped over to his mother’s gravestone, crouching next to it, his fingers delicately tracing along the engraved letters of her name, his other hand holding one of the marigold flowers Chucho had brought with him. The two of you watched quietly as Javi sat next to his mom, gently placing the flower on the shiny stone as he spoke. 
“Hola, mamá. Te extrañé. Siento haber tarado tanto.” (Hi mom. I missed you. I’m sorry I took so long). Javi’s voice trembled as he took a deep breath in, slowly exhaling as his hand rested on the stone, warm from the sun, shining brightly in the blue November sky. “Que estaba asustada de de verte porque estaba orgullosala de la persona en la que me había convertido. Que no quería decepcionarte. Tenía miedo mucho, mamá. Me sentí como si todo se derrumbase. solo quería olvidar. Pero entonces…” (I was scared to see you because I wasn’t proud of the person I’d become. I didn’t want to disappoint you. I was so scared, mom. I felt like I let everyone down. I just wanted to forget. But then…).  Javi turned his head, seeing you and Chucho, arm in arm, a smile growing across his face as looked back at the two people in life he loved the most. He took an extra moment to stare at you and the soft grin spread between your cheeks, basking in the comfort and warmth of the woman who had forever changed his life for the better. “Pero entonces, mamá, La conocí. Que es perfecta. Nunca supe que podías amar tanto a alguien. Ella es lo mejor que me ha pasado. La habrías amado.ella es una maestra, tambien.  A veces me pregunto qué ve en mí. No sé qué hice para merecerse. voy a pedirle que se case conmigo.Cuidaré bien de ella. Ella se merece todo lo que le pueda dar y más. Espero que estés orgulloso de mí, mamá. te echo mucho, Pero le juro a usted, al fin soy feliz. Te amo, mamá.”  (But then, mom, I met her. She is perfect. I never knew you could love someone so much. She is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You would have loved her. She’s a teacher too. Sometimes, I wonder what she sees in me. I don’t know what I did to deserve her. I’m gonna ask her to marry me. I’m gonna take such good care of her. She deserves everything I can give her and more. I hope you’re proud of me, mamá. I miss you so much, but I promise you, I’m finally happy. I love you, mom.) 
With a gentle nudge from Chucho, you softly stepped behind Javi, gently placing your hands on his shoulders before he rose up and you wrapped your arms around his waist, resting your head against his chest as he wiped away the tears welling behind his eyes. Staring down at Lucia’s gravestone, Javi ran his hand through your hair, carefully planting a kiss against your head and burying his nose in the soft waves of your hair. 
“I wish I would have had the chance to have met you, Mrs. Peña. I would have had someone else to commensurate with over all of the crazy teaching stories I’m sure the both of us have. Maria, Estelle and Linda all miss you a lot too, but I’m sure they haven’t changed a bit. Thanks for raising such a good son. I don’t know what I would do without him. I know he says that he doesn’t know what he did to deserve me, but I really think it should be the other way around. I promise I’ll look out for him.” You tried your best to smile through your soft sobs, looking up at Javi, tears streaming down his wet cheeks. It wasn’t long before Chucho had snuck up behind you, patting each of you on the back before smiling down at Lucia, too. 
“Estos dos están tan enamorados, Lucia. Tal vez más que tú y yo. Ella es una buena chica. Estoy muy contenta de que ella sea parte de nuestra familia. Finalmente tendremos a nuestros nietos, también.”  (These two are so in love, Lucia. Maybe even more than you and I. She is a great girl. I am so happy she is a part of our family. We are finally going to get our grandchildren, too). Chucho winked, nudging Javi in the side, forcing him to laugh through his tears, shaking his head at his dad’s comment. “Now, no more tears, you two. This is a happy day. Your mamá is smiling down on you, and I can almost hear here scolding me to keep you from crying anymore. C’mon, let’s decorate and eat, I even brought pozole.” 
The three of you spent the next hour decorating Lucia’s grave with bright orange and gold cempazuchitl (marigold flowers) and little Calaveras (sugar skulls) painted in bold colors and refined details, sharing and laughing about Javi’s favorite memories of his mother while snacking on the Pozole Chucho had brought to share. For the first time in a long time, Javi no longer felt guilt and grief when he thought about his mom- her memory filled him with love and joy. He wasn’t the same bitter, broken man he was when he had said his final goodbyes to his mother all those years ago. While he wished he could change the past, the reality of the present, and his future finally brought him peace, knowing he could be proud of the man he had become, thanks to you. 
As Javi helped Chucho to clean up the extra flowers and decorations he had brought, you couldn’t help yourself from reaching at the wrinkled photo you had shoved in your pocket as you had packed up to leave from the Murphy’s this morning. You carefully took it out, holding it gently in your hands as you tried to uncrinkle the edges. “You ready, Hermosa?” Javi called out, now a few steps ahead of you, making his way back towards the truck. “Hermosa?” He asked again, thinking perhaps you hadn’t heard him the first time. When he was greeted by silence again, he looked back to see you staring at the crumpled photo in your hands. 
“I um- I know that he isn’t buried here, and uh, if you don’t want me to, it’s okay- but um- is it, is it alright if I leave a couple flowers for Patrick?” You sniffed, a tear dropping down on the photo of the two of you, Patrick holding you in a headlock as you laughed with a wide, toothy grin, drowning in one of his old Blackhawks jerseys that you were so excited to wear because it belonged to him. 
“Of course, Osita. Of course it is.” Javi smiled at you softly, turning back around with the tub of leftover decorations, making his way towards you. Quietly, you walked back over to Lucia’s gravestone, carefully setting down the picture of you and Patrick next to it, putting a few marigolds over top of it so it stayed pinned in place from the warm breeze. 
“I miss you, asshole. You deserved so much better. I hope you don’t still think that I hate you. I mean, I do, but you know what I mean. Honestly, you were lucky you didn’t have to live through the Blackhawks losing in the playoffs this year, that fucking sucked. Mom and Dad and Charlie and David all miss you too. I finally went back home to see them. It still wasn’t the same without you there, but I know you don’t hurt anymore. I hope that you don’t hurt anymore. I love you, Patrick. Crack open a cold one up there for me, okay?” Trying your best to not to uncontrollably sob, you sniffled, wiping the tears running down your face as you leaned your head against Javi’s chest. He ran his hand along your back as he held you tighter, letting you take a moment to get everything out before you took a deep breath, nodding your head as if to signify to Javi and yourself that you were okay. 
“You okay, Osita? We can take all the time you need, baby.” Javi whispered, pressing a gentle kiss into your shoulder. 
“No, I’m okay. I just- I wanted to do something for him, too. Thanks, Javi. I love you.” 
“I know.” 
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After several more long hugs goodbye with Chucho, you and Javi began your journey back home, marveling at the beautiful sunset, painting the sky with bright pinks and oranges and the warmth and comfort of Lucia and Patrick’s presence. You were so lost in thought staring out at the fading sky, you hadn’t even noticed that Javi had detoured from your usual route home until he had said something to you. “You okay if we make a quick pit stop on the way home, Osita?” You nodded, smiling at the golden glow covering his face. It wasn’t long until you were veering off the main road, Javi turning to make his way down a tree lined gravel pathway with a “For Sale” sign posted in front of it. 
“For sale?” You questioned, looking over at Javi before peering out your window to watch the trees lining the path pass by you as the gravel crunched under the truck’s tires.
“Yeah, uh- I was talking with Steve at the party yesterday and he- uh, one of his buddies said he was looking to get out of the city- wanted a plot of land to build on. Said he had heard good things about Laredo but didn’t have time to go check things out for himself, so I told him I would go take a look around and let Steve know what I thought.” Javi replied, trying his best to sound nonchalant as you shrugged before looking back out the window. As you reached the end of the path, the trees opened to reveal a beautiful, lush green field, the sun setting perfectly along the rolling hills of the horizon in front of you. Turning off the ignition, Javi gestured for the both of you to get out of the truck so you could go take a look around. 
“Jav… This is beautiful.” You marveld, grinning as you took in the beauty of the open space drenched in golden sunset. 
“You like it?” Javi grinned, laughing as you spun around, the gentle breeze blowing your hair in and out of your face. 
“Oh my God, yeah. Tell Steve’s friend to get on this place ASAP before I scrounge up every penny I have and sell one of my kidneys on the black market to buy it from him. There doesn’t even need to be a house, I’ll just lay in the empty field, perfectly content.” You giggled, letting out a happy sigh as you grabbed Javi’s hand, leaning your head against his arm as you admired the sun slipping away below the horizon. 
“I’ll take that as a yes then. He said he’s wanting to build a house here, do you think- do you think that he would think it’s got enough space? It’s not too far from everything? I know it’s a little farther from downtown and a longer drive to work- if uh, if he works by where we do, you don’t think that’d be a problem? For him?” Javi squeezed back, trying his best not to stumble over his words. 
“Are you kidding me? It’s literally perfect out here, Javi. Could you imagine getting to see this every night? He better put some big windows on this house so he can get all of the sunlight, oh my god, it would be so pretty. It’s not even that far from everything, and the view makes the extra drive time worth every minute. I know it’s probably a far way off, and we haven’t really talked about it, but I would love to live at a place like this someday.” 
Javi smiled to himself, looking down at you as you rested against him, soaking in every ounce of you as he shifted his arm to wrap around your waist, gently rubbing his thumb along the soft hem of your shirt before letting out a content sigh. 
“Yeah. Me too.”
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| Your Salaryman Husband | (Vol 5)
Vol 1 Vol 2 Vol 3 Vol 4 (Not Required) Vol 6 Vol 7 Vol 8 Vol 9
Salaryman!Kento x Housewife!Reader
Visiting Nanami at work...
Word Count: 1.5k
CW: SFW, domestic fluff, fem!Reader, slightly slightly suggestive, office things
A/n: The pacing is a bit off in this, I'll do Gojo in the next volume (which will hopefully be better).
Within your last three months of marriage, it had become even more clear to you just how organized your husband Nanami was. 
The talented Jujutsu Sorcerer, and current salaryman, was always on time to wake up, go to work, and come home, never varying more than a couple of minutes. It was easy to plan things that way, knowing exactly when to greet him and have dinner ready. 
He kept to the usual schedule, drinking his morning coffee on the living room table while looking over some documents on his computer. It was a simple part of his routine, and while rather mundane, it somehow produced some much needed peace before heading to work. 
He had gotten used to the banging of pots and pans, and the subtle hums that came out of your mouth as you cooked, having finished making breakfast and packing his lunch box for the day. You carefully balanced his plate and the basket of bread in your arms, safely setting them on the table next to his coffee cup, and made the second trip to grab your own, while he packed up his things. 
Sitting down, you couldn’t help but smile watching Nanami eat the food you made. He had a long day of work to go, various meetings to attend and many papers to read. To give him the gift of a good breakfast every morning was one of the greatest joys you had, knowing that he would need it in the hours to come, along with his lunch of course. 
There wasn’t much left for Nanami to do that morning. His clothes had been picked out by you and placed neatly in a pile, his breakfast was made, also by you, and his briefcase and shoes were set by the door for when he left. Despite your husband’s usual organized manner, he seemed to have forgotten one important thing as he stepped out the door, another boring work day ahead of him. 
You had already moved on to get the morning chores done, scrubbing down the bathroom tiles and sink, and throwing the dirty clothes into the laundry. You watched out the window while wiping the dishes with soapy water, taking a deep sigh of relief knowing you were almost done. The sky was blue and the sun was shining brightly throughout the house, and while the weather was lovely, rain hadn’t fallen on your plants in quite a while. So you took a watering can and went outside, tending to the fruits and vegetables and harvesting the ripe ones. 
Time really does fly when you’re having fun, which you were, seeing the variety of colors fill the basket, a testament of your hard work and care. When you got back into the house, fully prepared to relax on the couch and read, you noticed something peculiar on the kitchen counter.
A lunch box. It was none other than your husband, Kento Nanami’s, lunch box.
The clock read 11:12, meaning less than an hour until his lunch break. Of course this was not a regular occurrence, so the thoughts that went through your head were a bit past rational. “What if he doesn’t have money with him… or doesn’t have time to go to a store?” you mumbled to yourself, pacing around the kitchen. 
There was only one thing to do, in your mind. You could just bring the lunchbox to Nanami, right? So you quickly grabbed a bag and placed the box into it, as well as your wallet, and got out the door. It was about a 20 minute walk to the station at your speed, and a 15 minute ride to get to his building. 
Stepping out of the station, you gazed widely at the imposing building that Nanami worked in. Though you had seen it before, then it wasn’t surrounded by large crowds of people walking around the city.
You dashed inside the building, the lobby filled with salarymen grabbing coffee from the shop on the first floor. To that you had to facepalm, seeing the menu had sandwiches and other savory items. Of course he would have the opportunity to get lunch, all the other workers did it.
Turning back was an option, in your dress and flats you looked quite out of place, but it was 11:55, and Nanami would be on break in 5 minutes. It would be a waste of money to buy a sandwich, when you had an even better lunchbox waiting for him. 
When the clock struck 12:00, you started to find your way throughout the massive building, to the secretary’s desk. Nanami and the rest of his department would be on break, so you could visit him in his office. 
The secretary buzzed you up to his floor, and you wandered around past the mass of people heading to the elevator. Peaking around each doorway you looked for Nanami’s blonde hair and dark gray suit, having not seem him leave. The striking figure of your husband was hard to miss. 
Nanami sat hunched over in his chair, rummaging through his things in search of something. He was the only one who hadn’t left the room yet, letting out a grunt when his hands came up empty. You silently walked over to him, happy that you were able to find him so quickly. 
“Kento, darling,” you stated meekly, smiling to greet Nanami. He looked over his shoulder in surprise, you had never been to his office before. “Y/n, what are you doing here?”  He inquired, eyeing you. It couldn’t have been easy, figuring out where everything was and making the journey here. 
He smoothed his hand over his neck, leaning to the side. “I appear to have forgotten my lunch, could that be it?” he asked, not waiting for your response. You nodded, reaching into your bag to hand him the box. “Right on time, thank you, my love,” he reciprocated your smile, the shyness knocked off your face. “While you’re always welcome to come visit me, you really don’t have to come all this way for something like this…” he started clearing the papers off his desk. “I didn’t realize you had a cafe downstairs,” you laughed, “and that the streets here are so busy during the day.” 
“Their sandwiches are fine, but I’d still rather have this - it certainly has more nutritional value,” Nanami relaxed, setting his lunchbox on the desk. “I don’t know what slipped my mind, I’m sorry you had to come deliver this, Y/n,” he stood up, adjusting his tie with his hand. 
“I should probably be getting back now, Kento,” you frowned, not having much of any reason to stay. Your own lunch was at home, and the train would only get busier. Nanami gently gripped your shoulder, leading you to sit down in the chair in front of his desk.
“It tends to settle down a little while people are eating, why don’t you stay a bit longer? Only a few minutes - I enjoy your company, afterall,” he smirked as you took in the office around you. “The view is beautiful,” you looked out the window, your hand mindlessly fiddling with your other one as you avoided his gaze, towering over you until he sat down. It was the same sky and weather that was at home, but you were with him, and that made it so much better.  
“Though it makes getting around a bit longer, this office has the best view, and is quite secluded,” he picked up his fork and took a bite of food. “For the many meetings with clients I have, it works out well as a background, and for soundproofing,” you nodded, listening intently. “My other coworkers are on this floor, and the one below it,” he mentioned, eating more. You continued your conversation a short while longer. 
“It’s already 12:20, I’ll let you leave now,” he stared at his watch, slightly annoyed that the second hand kept ticking. You stood up, feeling the lack of weight on your shoulder as your bag was nearly empty. A reminder of your purpose for being in the office in the first place.
“Do other wives visit often?” you asked, curious, as Nanami joined you. “A few, but mostly at the end of the day,” he took your hand, as the two of you walked out into the rest of the floor. “Most of my coworkers are single,” he sighed, as you looked a bit surprised. 
“Maybe I should start forgetting my lunch more often,” Nanami met your flustered gaze, you didn’t want to say goodbye and wait for hours for him to come home. “You could see more of the work we do here,” he smiled, pulling you into a hug, “and all those dull trainees could see what a beautiful wife I have,” you blushed red. 
“Goodbye, Kento, I love you,” you started walking out the building, cheeks flushed and a smile not leaving your face. “Stay safe, Y/n, I love you too,” he replied, watching you leave. “Only a few more hours…” he mumbled in his head, “a few more hours…”
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suuuupernovaaa · 1 year
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kxuke
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kxuke [ˈk’u.kɛ] adj. safe
Anonymous Request: What about Avatar reader x Neteyam with the "I won't say I'm in love" trope. The reader was part of Quaritch's team, but she got captured by the Sullys. She was under Neteyam's supervision, and they both fell in love slowly. However, they don't want to admit their feelings. Reader ends up betraying Quaritch's and fighting alongside the Sullys.
This would probably do better as a multi-chaptered story, so you may see it expanded as such in the future.
5.3k words
For two months, they've carried me from place to place, kept me in the dark, barely spoken to me. When I wake up, I'm back on base, but I have no information to give my team.
I can't see outside. I can't hear anything but what sounds like leaves blowing in the wind and birds chirping, even though I know it's not what I'd think of as birds.
Every morning, it's the same thing. The oldest Sully brings me something to eat, asks me if I have anything to tell him, and I say no. I ask if he has anything to tell me, and he says no.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
I'm tired, I'm sore, and I smell terrible. I'm under 24/7 surveillance by one of the Sullys, and I'm pretty sure that soon, they're going to give up and kill me. After all, I'm the enemy, part of Quartich's elite squad, and there's nothing I have to offer them.
I know what they know: Quartich is hunting the Sullys, and he won't stop until he kills them all, even the children.
The solitude is wearing me down, and my team is growing tired of my uselessness. I don't know why they keep putting me back under every morning - but they do, hoping I'll have something useful for them. I never do.
It's another morning - can't say whether it's sunny, or cloudy, or rainy - and Neteyam arrives as he always does, but he's a little early, and I'm ashamed that he finds me crying.
I begged my team not to put me back here, not to let me spend another day in dark isolation, but they don't want the avatar - a hefty investment - to go to waste. If she doesn't wake up, the Sullys will definitely kill her.
Neteyam clears his throat, and sets the usual meal of fruit and bread in front of me.
"Thanks," I say.
He nods. He doesn't ask if I have anything to tell him, so I don't either. Then, he leaves. Wonderful. The only social interaction I ever get, and it's gone.
I spend the day as I always do - pacing, doing jumping jacks, stretches, and staring at the dark ceiling, wondering who's standing just outside, keeping watch.
As the sun begins to go down, I feel relief. Soon, I can close my eyes, fall asleep, and return to freedom. Though, it's starting to feel less like freedom.
I took this job because I didn't have anything else in my life, and I've always been a good soldier - but it's not like I really believe in Quartich. Sometimes, I've wondered if what we're doing here is even right.
Is the human race so important that we need to displace these people to continue? What good have we done, that we deserve that?
Unexpectedly, the flap to the tent, or pod, I'm in, opens up, and Neteyam steps through.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, standing up.
He holds a thick cloth out to me. "Over your eyes," he says.
My heart rate quickens. This is it. They're finally going to kill my avatar. I've heard it's unpleasant, dying in your avatar, and it isn't like you get to go back to your human body after. It's the end for both of you.
I have to admit, I'm also a little relieved as I take the cloth from him. The last two months have been exhausting, and psychologically damaging, and made me question every single choice I've made in my life.
I can't keep doing this, and I can't escape... so maybe death is the only way out.
After I tie the cloth securely over my eyes, Neteyam checks thoroughly.
"I can't see," I say, as if he would trust me.
He grabs my arm, and pulls. "Come."
This is it.
--
My feet touch sand, and then water, and I want to scream with joy. It's dark out, not that I could see anything anyway, and quiet. I don't hear anyone else around us.
"Water," I whisper. Neteyam keeps pulling me. Is he going to drown me in it? Could he maybe just let me... clean up a little, before he kills me? I don't want to die this dirty.
Neteyam grabs my hand, and places something in it. A small, wet sack.
"To clean," he says, and I hear a pistol cock. "Don't go far, and don't make noise."
Holy shit, he is going to let me clean up. Sure, he's going to hold a gun and watch me wash my naked body, but I'll take it. Without any hesitation or shame, I pull off the dirty tank top and shorts I've been wearing, and go deeper into the water. I scrub every inch of myself, even under the mask, and scrub my hair until my scalp burns. This is definitely an ocean, the salty water burns my eyes and my dry lips, but I don't care at all. It still feels so amazing.
"Oh, my god," I moan when I come up for air. "Thank you."
Neteyam says nothing, just grunts, and grabs my arm. "Come, we must go back."
I'm definitely naked, but Neteyam pulls me away anyway and honestly, the thought of putting those disgusting clothes back on makes me want to die, so I leave them in the ocean. I would rather be naked and clean.
Neteyam takes me back to my prison, and pulls the cloth from my eyes.
We stare at each other for a long moment. "Why?" I ask.
He shrugs, turns, and leaves. I see laying on the floor, some clothes - if you can call them that. The top is essentially a tube top, easy enough to put on, but the bottoms take me a little while longer to figure out, especially with the tail. But they're clean, and so am I, and I cry again.
--
That isn't the last kindness that Neteyam does for me. Late at night, when everyone else is asleep, he often returns, bringing me new clothes, food, even letting me wash once in a while.
After a couple weeks of this, I work up the courage to ask him why.
"You haven't told them where we are, or they would have come. And they keep sending you back. You must be... lonely."
I bite my lip. "I can't tell them. I don't know. They keep sending me back because, because I don't know, and they say, if I don't wake up here, you'll kill... her." I gesture to my avatar body, who is me, but not me. "Why haven't you killed me?"
"Mom and dad can't agree," Neteyam shrugs. "What's your name?"
It takes me aback that I've never told him that, and that he's never asked before. "Y/N," I reply.
"Why do you do what you... do? Why follow him?"
I look down. "Earth is bad, Neteyam. You have parents who care about you, right?"
He nods.
I shrug. "I never had that. I never had anyone. I just had the marines. And I was good at it, so they sent me here. I just... didn't have anywhere else to go."
Without another word, Neteyam leaves again.
I haven't told my team about any of this. I don't think I'm going to.
--
Neteyam keeps asking me questions, every day, about my home on earth, what happened to my family, what being a marine is like... and I ask him questions, too, about growing up on Pandora, about his family, but I'm careful not to ask anything about where we are. All I know is, we're by the ocean. That wouldn't be very helpful information, anyway.
I look forward to seeing Neteyam every day, more than I've ever looked forward to anything in my life. Just sitting and talking with him brings me more happiness than anything else I can remember, and it's equal parts upsetting and confusing.
I'm not sure where I stand, or where we go from here. I'm just a Sky Person, and an evil one... I couldn't possibly be someone Neteyam would want to be friends with, and I definitely couldn't earn the trust of his family, so what will become of me?
Will they still kill me?
Eventually, Neteyam isn't alone when he comes one afternoon. I expected this eventually, but I didn't expect it would be Neytiri, his mother.
It's our first time coming face to face, and in the dim light of my prison, she's terrifying - her wide, glowing eyes, staring down at me; she looks like an angel of death, beautiful and terrifying.
I want to shrink, and avoid eye contact, but my training won't allow it. I stand, shoulders back, returning her gaze.
"Almost four months, we've kept you alive," she says, standing tall and strong before me. "And now I know my idiot son has let you out. You could have told them where we are. Why haven't you?"
"I wear a blindfold," I reply, and glance over her shoulder at Neteyam. The air is tense, and he stares at his mother nervously.
"Bah, I'm not stupid. Tell me why you haven't told them."
She's right. What I've felt and heard outside these walls, it could give my team vital information - but I haven't even let them know I've set foot outside.
I glance at Neteyam again, and this time, she follows my gaze.
"It's my son. You care for him?" She wrinkles her nose, disgusted at the thought.
"No, I - I just... don't want to help them, I guess."
She looks me, head to toe, one more time, and then they both leave.
--
Something has to change. I feel I've lost control of my life, and I want just a little bit back.That evening, when I wake up on base, I give a disappointing report to my team, and then make my plans to leave.
There are countless outposts on Pandora where I could access a link remotely - a few that base can't track, because they're so remote that they had to be fully self-sufficient. All I need to do is pack a bag, and I can be on my way, but it will have to be on foot. Human foot.
Any vehicle that I can steal, they can track. And the forest is easy to navigate in my avatar body, but my human body is small and slow - not to mention, I'll be a target for every predator out there.
Still, I'd rather die in this human form than continue on the way I have. So, I pack my bag, and head out. No one really cares what I do at night anyway, as long as I link back up in the morning for another useless day of gathering zero intel.
--
It takes two days, which is much longer than I thought it would, and I just barely scrape through the jungle before finding one of the scientist's outposts.
There is a chance they'll find me here, but they'll have to search a long time to do it - and the team of avatars would have to fly back, and abandon their physical search for the Sullys, to do it. It doesn't seem like they'd make me a priority.
It's mid-morning when I arrive, dirty and hungry, and as much as I want to link to my avatar - who hopefully hasn't been sunk to the bottom of the ocean yet - I need to clean up, and eat.
As soon as I'm done, I put myself under, and pray it works.
It's moments before I wake up, and I'm disoriented when I do. I usually wake up in the dark, but this time, it's blindingly bright out. I'm not lying down in my lonely hut, instead, I'm speeding through the air, the wind whipping at my back, and Neteyam at my front.
My eyes take a long time to adjust, and my lungs take even longer to get in a good breath of air. I'm on Neteyam's Ikran, tied to him, face to face.
"What the hell!" I scream, and without thinking, wrap my arms around his waist. I'm not a pilot, so not really one for flying. In fact, heights really aren't my thing at all. I cling to him, taking in the scenery around me through wide, terrified eyes.
We're above the ocean, with nothing in sight as far as I can see, which only adds to my fear.
"You're alive," Neteyam responds, having to shout for me to hear him. "I wasn't sure if they'd killed you or not."
"I'll explain when we land," I yell in response, and he nods.
It's very strange, being this close to Neteyam. He's grabbed my arm, even pulled me along by my hand before, but now, I'm straddling him, sitting in his lap, a tight rope around my torso, holding me to him - well, it's purpose was obviously to hold my limp avatar to him, but I'm glad to have the security, nonetheless.
He stares ahead, focused on where we're going, and it allows me a little bit of time to think. Not about our situation, or the plan either of us has... but about him.
I can't deny the joy I feel at being here with Neteyam, and I'm not sure if I'm just glad to have woken up anywhere but my dark, lonesome hut, or if it's something more.
Abandoning my life back on Earth to come to Pandora pretty much guaranteed I would never enjoy a romantic relationship again. I'd never been interested in marines, ironically enough. And scientists certainly weren't interested in me. And that was kind of... it, here.
Except, Neteyam. A man my age. A man who has been taking care of the enemy, showing me mercy, visiting me every day, asking me questions about myself and listening carefully to the responses.
It's such a complex, confusing situation, and there was no way to know if it was just being the baseline of Na'vi decency, or if it was something more for him.
It's a long ride, and I have hours to think about all of it, and how hungry I am.
When we finally land, Neteyam hands me a bag full of dried fruits and meat. I take it gratefully, and ask him what's going on.
"When you didn't wake up, there was a lot of debate about what to do with your body. My mother wanted to throw you to the ocean, my father was starting to agree with her and I... didn't think it was right. So I offered to move you, to wait and see if you woke up, and to leave you far from where my family is if you didn't."
I chew on the tough, dried meat. "Oh. Why?"
Neteyam looks away, removing his poncho, and tucking it into his bag. "I do not want you to die."
I nod. "Oh."
"You tell me this - what do you stand for?"
That's not something I've ever been asked. The answer would have been easy four months ago. I was a marine, I had an assignment, and I was serving my country.
But now I know, I never believed in that. It was just something to make me finally feel like I belonged, but it wasn't something I truly wanted to belong to.
"Neteyam, I really don't know. I don't want to help the Sky People, and I won't do anything to harm your family, but... it leaves me, sort of in-between. Do you understand?"
He nods.
"And I, well, I do care about you. You don't have any reason to be this nice to me, to treat me this good. Why do you do that?"
He furrows his brow, looking as confused as I feel.
"I don't know," he replies.
I don't, either.
--
We set up a camp nearby, Neteyam hangs a hammock in a tree while I stand by uselessly, trying to watch and learn. He hunts after that, and insists I join, but as quiet as I try to be, I'm still too loud.
So, Neteyam finds a new purpose - teach me to hunt. And to fish. And to be like his people.
It's fucking hard. I always thought I was strong, fast and capable, but I'm nothing compared to Neteyam. I lag behind, I'm clumsy and slow, and it takes me forever to learn simple concepts.
Neteyam is endlessly patient with me, in a way I don't deserve, and as the days drag on, we both smile a lot more. We even find ourselves laughing, on occasion.
Neteyam likes to tease me about my lack of coordination, but it's easy to see that he likes teaching me, otherwise he wouldn't take such care to explain things the way he does.
These weeks in the jungle with him, they're the best of my life.
When I wake up in my human body at night, I can't deny how disappointed I am. It's messing with my head, how the tall, blue version of myself is starting to feel like the real me, and this small human feels like the imposter.
Eventually, I'm able to open up to Neteyam about this.
"My father, he asked Eywa to... to transfer him, into his avatar. He had the whole clan to help him, though."
"Why did she do it?"
"He was meant to be one of The People."
I consider that for a while.
--
It's been a couple weeks, just Neteyam and myself here, and I can't deny how I'm feeling any longer.
It makes no sense, for me to be in love with him, but I undeniably am. It's really stupid actually, to fall in love with someone under my circumstances, but I've always thought love was kind of stupid anyway.
So I make a request.
"Do you think... Eywa would let me stay, in this body?"
"Do you want to be one of The People?"
I bite my lip and think. "I want to belong to something bigger than myself, and I want it to be something... selfless. Something that doesn't demand I be something I'm not. And I want, to stay with you."
The corners of his mouth pull up into a smile. "I think she would let you. I think it's dangerous to try, without the clan, but if you want to..." I see the wheels in his head spinning. "We will need your human body, and we will need the tree of souls. At night."
We form a plan.
--
Neteyam carries my avatar in his arms, and I trail behind, very slowly, in my human body. It took us three days to travel back to the outpost where I was staying, and two more days to travel, the three of us, to the tree of souls.
We had to wait then, just outside, until it was deserted.
"You need to be sure," Neteyam says, towering over me as we wait in the wings. "If you are not sure, it will not work." He reaches out and puts a giant hand on my small shoulder. I wonder what he thinks of my dark skin, my curly hair, my frame and build... but I guess it won't matter much longer.
"I'm sure. And listen, I might die down there, right?"
He takes in a deep breath. "Maybe."
I nod. "Great. Well, listen, I might as well just say it then. I'm mostly doing this because Earth sucks, humans suck, and I don't want any part of it anymore. But I'm also doing it because, I think, I might be in love with you a little bit. So, I don't want to die without having said it. And I don't want you to say anything back. You can tell me how you feel, one way or another, if I wake up. Otherwise, say it over my grave."
I can tell Neteyam is trying not to roll his eyes - something he does often in my presence - so he just nods, and squeezes my shoulder.
When the coast is clear, we approach together, and Neteyam walks me through it. I watch him lay down my avatar body, and I lay similarly to her, our heads near each other.
I should be nervous, but I mostly feel calm.
Didn't I want to die just a month or two ago? And now here I am, with a second chance at life.
Neteyam begins to pray over me, and it sounds a little clumsy, but he's got the spirit. I close my eyes, and feel featherlight touches all over my body... and I drift off.
--
She closes her eyes, and Neteyam's heart squeezes in his chest.
He knows this is stupid. He's no Tsahik, and they need the full power of the clan to make this transfer... but that's not possible, and he doesn't see any other way to keep Y/N for himself.
He knows it's selfish, but he also knows that his mother allowed him to fly off with this woman, and that has to mean something.
Eywa will see how strong she is, how determined she is, and how much she deserves a true home. Every time Neteyam thinks about the stories she told him of her childhood, the neglect and the abuse, he has to fight back equal parts rage and incredible sadness.
He thinks of those months, locked in her mauri pod, barely any sunlight or interaction, and wonders how she survived - but now he knows, she survived worse than that at the hands of people who were meant to love and protect her.
Y/N seemed so strong at first, and she is, but he can truly See her now. Part of her is still that child, seeking love and confidence in another person, and he wants nothing more than to give it to her - his family's opinion on it be damned.
He prays hard, begging Eywa to give Y/N this one good thing in her life, finally, and waits for her to open her eyes.
--
It feels as if I drift off into a dream, into a very deep sleep, and when I open my eyes, I feel well-rested - I can't remember the last time I felt well-rested.
It isn't until I see Neteyam hovering over me that I realize what's happened. I tear my eyes from his to look down at myself - and see blue.
It fucking worked. It shouldn't have! We had everything against us - except Eywa, who granted our prayers.
Neteyam lifts me up slowly by my shoulders. It doesn't feel like when I link with this body from the lab; something about this feels different. I never felt fully settled in this body until now.
I turned to look at her - myself - and wonder if I should mourn. I think of all the mistreatment I accepted in that body, all the times I let myself be hurt and abused, and swear to myself that I will not let that happen in this new life I've been given.
"We need to bury her," I say.
Neteyam nods, and wordlessly lifts her up into his arms. I watch as he leans down, removing her mask, and placing a kiss on each of her dimpled cheeks.
"She is beautiful," he says, and my heart wells up into my throat, tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.
She is beautiful, and she deserves to rest now. It doesn't take long to find her a quiet resting place, and I shed a few tears for her as we cover her up.
"Goodbye," I whisper, wiping the dirt from my hands, and Neteyam joins me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.
"Eywa has given you a new life. What will you do with it?"
I set my jaw and furrow my brow. "I will fight with you, and your family."
--
We make a long, hard journey back across the sea to Neteyam's family and the Metkayina. For the first time, with my own eyes, I see the place I was held captive.
It's beautiful, with white sand beaches and blue green water. It's hard to imagine how depressing and desolate this place seemed to me not that long ago.
We are accosted on the beach as soon as we arrive, and through the large gathering crowd, Neteyam's parents and siblings rush to us.
"What is she doing here?" Neytiri hisses, grabbing her son's arm. He pulls back from her, and reaches out for my hand, pulling me to his side as dozens of pairs of eyes watch.
"There is much to discuss. Y/N is not a threat to us. You must listen to me."
Neytiri hisses at me, and I stand silent and expressionless. Jake looks on, his expression somewhere between anger and confusion. He turns to another man, tall and imposing, covered in tattoos - it's very easy to tell he's in charge.
"We'll handle this," he tells the man, who nods, and Neteyam and I are pulled through the crowd and off the beach, to a set of mauri pods. I've never seen them before, but Neteyam described them to me while we were away. Without the door covered, they're light, airy, and beautiful.
We enter one of the largest ones, and Neteyam's parents turn to us. "Explain."
Neteyam takes a deep breath and does his best to tell them everything, starting with all I learned in the month we were away together, the way I dedicated myself to learning our ways - just like Jake did, when he first met Neytiri.
The comparison is clever, I have to give him that.
I don't know how I feel about what he says next, as he describes my life on earth to his parents. Neteyam is the only person I've ever shared that with, and it hurts to hear him discuss it so freely, but I understand why he's doing it. If they're going to spare my life, they might need to feel a little sympathy.
"Y/N deserves to be one of The People. She could have given us away and instead, she chose to abandon her people, and risk her life in asking Eywa to allow her to stay in this form. And Eywa has granted that request. I buried her human body myself."
For the first time, neither of Neteyam's parents have anything to say. Everyone stares at each other for a long, tense moment.
"I would never do anything to hurt your family," I say finally, stepping out from behind Neteyam. "I can't do anything but promise you that, on my life." I raise my hand to my chest, pressing it to my heart.
"You have passed through the eye, and return?" Neytiri asks.
Neteyam and I both nod.
"You swear this is true, son?" Jake asks solemnly. "You did this yourself? Just the two of you?"
"Impossible," Neytiri adds.
I shrug.
"Impossible, but we did it. Eywa willed it Herself. Y/N deserves to be one of The People."
"Lo'ak," Jake calls, and from just outside the mauri, Neteyam's brother enters. It's the first time I've laid eyes on him, though Neteyam has spoken of him often. Neteyam is all Neytiri, but Lo'ak is practically a carbon copy of his father.
"Take Y/N outside, we need to talk," Jake says, and I look to Neteyam with wide eyes.
He reaches out, taking my face into his hand, running his thumb over my cheek. "It'll be okay," he says, and I nod.
As I leave, I can't help but think, for the thousandth time, that I confessed my love for him, and he hasn't said a word about it since.
--
Lo'ak is clearly unsure what to do with me as we leave, so I recommend sitting on the beach. I haven't enjoyed the beach without a blindfold, and it seems like a relaxing thing to do.
Lo'ak agrees, and leads me through a mess of mauri pods down to the water. I plop myself down, digging my toes into the wet sand, and sigh.
"It's nice to meet you, Lo'ak," I say, trying not to sound too formal, as he sits beside me.
"You too. I knew my brother was sneaking you out, but he never let me join."
It's such a younger brother thing to say, and I have to smile. "He was really nice to me, and he didn't have to be."
"We were all surprised, when we found out. Neteyam always does whatever mom and dad say. He's like, the perfect son."
My smile grows wider. "I think he probably still is."
Lo'ak rolls his eyes, and then I see how alike he and his older brother look.
"Probably. If I'd done this, I'd be skinned alive right now."
For the first time that day, I allow myself to truly laugh.
--
Neteyam joins us on the beach what feels like hours later, and Lo'ak beasts a hasty retreat after clapping his brother on the back.
I grasp the hand that Neteyam extends to me, and stand to look at him, brushing the sand off my thighs.
"Well?" I demand.
"That was rough. They're pretty mad about what we did but, they admitted they didn't really have much of a reason to be, besides me risking myself by going back to the Tree of Souls. They can't argue with Eywa, really. She wouldn't have done this for us if it didn't benefit the balance of life. You're meant to be one of us. My mom isn't happy about it, and my dad doesn't really get it but... you're not going to get any trouble from them. It doesn't mean they like you, especially my mom, but, she'll come around eventually."
I had been holding tension in every single muscle in my body, and at this news, everything relaxes all at once.
It feels as if a war is over. I get to stay in this body, and I get to stay with Neteyam. A wave of euphoria washes over me, and I close my eyes tightly, trying to keep the tears away.
"That's good news," I whisper.
"They especially couldn't argue when I, um, told them that I'm in love with you, and intend to make you my mate."
Mate.
That means wife, to him. And they don't have divorce here on Pandora.
My eyes open in a flash. "You do?"
"If you'll have me," he says, with a shrug and a very small smile. He seems more nervous now than he did earlier, facing his warrior-goddess mother.
In my entire life, I have never known stability. I have never been truly loved, cared for, or had anyone that I could trust. No one has ever tried to put in the effort to gain my trust, and certainly not my love.
Neteyam and I met as guard and prisoner. I was a threat to his family, and to his entire way of life, and still he went out of his way to take care of me. He risked everything for me.
No one has ever shown me that level of commitment - except the marine corps, who wanted my life in return.
Neteyam wants nothing in return. Neteyam loves me, and I know he will take care of me every day for the rest of our lives.
So the commitment isn't scary. It's welcome. It's a relief. It's a warm hug after coming in from the cold. It's everything I have ever needed and didn't think I'd ever be fortunate enough to receive.
The tears are falling freely now, and Neteyam reaches up to try and wipe them away, but they won't stop.
"I love you, Neteyam Sully. I never want to be away from you, not a single day, for the rest of my life." I can barely get the words out through sobs.
He reaches out, pulling me into his arms, hugging me so tightly it almost hurts.
"I will take care of you," he whispers in my ear, "the way you deserve. I promise you this."
With no doubts, I believe him. I will do whatever it takes to keep my mate safe, and I know he will too.
Tag List: @nhloversblog @itsemy01 @eringaitskill
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huboi · 4 months
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☆ - GUINEA PIG HYBRID READER FT MULTIPLE JJK MEN !
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╰┈➤ includes; gn! hybrid reader, mainly focused on reader squeaking and the guys falling heads over heels all over again, mentions of eating food
╰┈➤ a/n; this fic is heavily inspired by @appleblueberry-pie s’ post on Guinea pig hybrid reader with jjk men, tysm for letting me use this for a fic 🧡
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SATORU GOJO
when satoru first met you, he was instantly in love
you’re guessing that it’s mainly due to your unusual features such as small ears and a tiny barely noticeable tail
he hasn’t seen many hybrids in the sorcerer world, other than panda
one thing that gave him a huge fright was when you first squealed out of nowhere when he brought home some sweet treats
he was very concerned that you were in pain or injured in some way, only to be relieved once told you involuntarily tend to squeal when you get excited
after this experience he tries his best to excite you when possible, since he can’t get enough of your squeaks
always refrains from just squishing your cheeks together in response
man wants to keep you in his pocket
GETO SUGURU
enjoys hearing your squeals
he becomes extra soft when he hears them
one second he’s tearing down another pathetic useless monkey
and the next he’s practically cooing as you squeal in happiness once he comes back from his cult to visit you
you also tend to purr like a cat, especially when he sits you on his lap
his heart fucking melts
loves giving your ears little scritches since it makes you practically vibrate on top of him whilst putting like a lil’ kitty
if you’re unable to speak whilst squealing then he doesn’t mind, he actually finds it enduring how you can’t talk when squealing in joy
yes his daughters also love you so much, they both think you’re the cutest thing they’ve ever seen
NANAMI KENTO
man damn near shat himself the first time you started squeaking
it was when he came home from the usual sorcerer work, and he had a fresh loaf of bread to share with you
you just couldn’t hold back your excitement
you were so embarrassed afterwards, hiding your face behind your hands as nanami looked at you with concern
stuttering, you explained to him that you tend to squeak uncontrollably when you get excited
nanami finds it relaxing when you perch yourself on his lap and start purring in content
he low-key finds it very therapeutic and it helps him destress after a hard day at work
he finds it very cute and unique how you make certain noises when feeling different emotions, gives you more character in his book
won’t admit it but he always finds himself with a little smile plastered on his face when around you
TOJI FUSHIGURO
he’s such a meany about your squeaks :(
always teases you whenever you make animal noises
“aww, you happy to see me sweet thing? why didn’t you just say so?” he’ll coo whilst squishing your cheeks together before giving you a small yet sloppy kiss onto both cheeks
your squeaks scare him at times, but you won’t hear that from him
sometimes he’ll just be chilling then all of a sudden loud ass squeals echo throughout the house and he nearly has a heart attack
actually enjoys hearing you purring, especially sat on his lap
9 times out of 10 pretty much forces you on his lap or chest when you start purring
he actually seems to become less stiff and more calm when you purr on him
sometimes forgets you’re a hybrid and so gets a small surprise when he spots your lil ears on top of your head
CHOSO KAMO
has never in his 150 years of life seen a hybrid at all
very curious of your existence
will ask lots of questions even when you get into a relationship, he’s just a really curious fella what can he say?
he asks them so that he understands you better
when you first squeaked was when he gave you a small kiss on the lips, he was worried he did something wrong
only to be proven wrong when you snuggle up against the crook of his neck, arms wrapped around his body whilst your squeaks slowly but surely turn into content purrs
he melts into your embrace, he’s never felt this content in life other than when he’s with his brothers
your squeaks give him serotonin, he can’t live without your squeaks
enjoys how when he makes spaghetti that you start squeaking even before the foods ready, he concludes that you simply enjoy food so much
SUKUNA RYOMEN
claims that your presence annoys him to no end, especially your squeaks and purrs
then when you stop making those noises around him he feels…. sad?
not even an hour later and he’s telling you that he actually doesn’t mind your noises, low key is fond of them, but he won’t straight up admit he likes them, he’s too far up his own ass to admit when he likes something
he has probably seen hybrids at some point during his thousand plus years of existence, but even he’s aware of how rare hybrids are in the jujutsu world
your happy squeaks make him feel things he’s never felt before
the same goes for your purring
if he’s been gone for a long amount of time, you’ll rush up to him and embrace his muscular body as tight as possible whilst you purr which causes your body to vibrate against his
he finds it weird how your body vibrates when you purr
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© content belongs to @huboi on tumblr, DO NOT REPOST ON ANY SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS WHATSOEVER
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2-dsimp · 2 months
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——|———-|———|———
Yandere hitman squad
Introducing the Enforcer
——|———-|———|———
Yandere Enforcer that is the right hand man of the boss and bears a striking resemblance to a lion that is benevolent but also ferocious. He is the second tallest compared to the torturer standing at 6’ 5 having a lean muscled build littered with battle scars.
Yandere Enforcer Who is a rowdy impulsive individual that’s a bit rough on the edges with his intimidating looks and scruffy voice but in reality is just a giant ball of fluffy joy that can never sit still and always has to be on the move with his mind racing over peculiar tasks such as chatting up with random strangers, attending multiple activities, and picking up the Boss’s slack.
Yandere Enforcer That can’t get you out his mind from the current incident being replayed in his mind repeatedly, remembering you, as the cute firecracker who maced him in the dark alleyways when he was just tryna return your wallet that had fallen out from your pocket when you were leaving from the club after you were ditched by your friends who went to go hop another bar.
Yandere Enforcer who’s surprised at the attempted assault which fails because you were to short to aim it at him correctly and only messed up his pants leg but nonetheless laughs heartily at the misunderstanding and at the lil firecracker who’s embarrassed at their actions and blurts out many apologies and words of gratitude for his act of kindness.
Yandere Enforcer who finds your timid nature to be endearing and adorable enough for him to want to devour you. As he watched you struggle to formulate words in order to formally invite him to your apartment so you can offer him some bakery goods from the bakery shop that you owned as an apology gift.
Yandere Enforcer who’s fiery eyes lit up in childish excitement at the prospect of getting bakery sweets and breads, and at the fact that you owned a bakery to which he immediately asked you if he can drop by sometimes and when he received permission he gave you a big bear hug lifting you up into the air as if you weighed like a piece of paper. And that’s how you got him hooked.
Yandere Enforcer who gets very passionate when it comes to timid darling as they say a way to man’s heart is through his stomach and because you kept on indulging him in his gluttonous habits he’s now grown a taste for you and is just completely obsessed with his sweet baker. And since the Torturer is also an excellent baker one day he’d love to see the both of y’all collab and make some delicious food for him to eat.
Yandere Enforcer Who will always try to be around you wether it’ll be coincidentally bumping into you on the streets are just calling you frequently to see if you wanna go on adventures with him and will go to any lengths just to make you smile. He’ll be your best friend and lover making sure to always think about you and what you’re doing and how he can rock your world 24/7.
Yandere Enforcer Who unlike some of the others is not as prone to using violence as a means to keep his competitors at bay. Since his physical build and high levels of confidence he displays speaks for himself, I mean who’d wanna try a man who’s built like Tarzan and has the confidence of Gaston? But when it comes down to an unavoidable situation he will “accidentally” critically harm his rivals and turn them into a cripple for the rest of their lives. It was very unfortunate that your “friends” had gotten into an “fatal car accident” a few days later…
Yandere Enforcer that will be your exclusive guard dog being your best friend while also you shielding away from the world that dares to harm you, his little firecracker.
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