#but yeah...i need to exercise some self-care and this show needs to take a hint

[burned-lariat]

Yeah, after seeing everyone's reactions and posts, I think I'm gonna join y'all in a hiatus.

...Kind of.

Truth be told, yesterday was it for me. I'm angry at everything I'm seeing and I'm so fucking done with this show's bullshit agenda and lack of care, among other things. The head writers lack creativity (at a minimum) and Korte has way too much power and influence while Frank does nothing about it. It's enraging and I need a stopgap before it kills me.

With that said, I will still be posting fic updates and continuing my GH writings. I hope everyone who is reading them continues to read them - your support is everything. I want to continue what I'm doing with HTKHWD and SCR, for one. I also want to follow through on some other plans I have:

A Nina/Willow fix-it fic

A YA fic with the inclusion of SORASed Emma Drake & Alec Barrett

A Sprina fic (still figuring out the overall theme/plot)

Assorted one-shots

Potential sequel fics to some works (we'll see - eyeing HTKHWD and maybe TTFE)

I also want to try and get a start on some more original works and get back to writing poetry (I have "published" some if anyone's interested). So overall, I'm still writing, but in terms of watching the show every day...not so much.

Next week seems like a near-complete skip, but the week of the 10th sounds better, so I plan to watch for the characters and spoilers that don't sound like it'll spike my blood pressure. It'll be intermittent watching, in a way.

Anons - please continue sending asks. Don't think that because I'm on a "sabbatical" that I still can't reply or anything. My inbox is still open, and I always enjoy hearing from you. Whatever you want to say about the show or characters or writing, I'm all ears.

Let's see how this goes, shall we? 😬

[reg-arcturus-black]

Oooh the Stormy Saturdays one was so sweet—could you do a Remus x Plus sized reader too? I don’t have any real plot preferences, so do with it what you want hahahah

Hi! Thank you so much! ❤ The story line - at least for me lol - turned out to be better than what I expected. Hope you like it! 🌸💕

The One (Remus Lupin x Plus Sized Reader)

1.1k words

Mostly fluff.

Requests now open.

Masterlist

TW: Eating disorder

Your mouth tasted weird and your body felt weak. Not again. You groaned inwardly. You turned to your side and felt someone rubbing their thumb over the back of your hand.

Remus. You would have recognized his touch anywhere. But you didn't want him there. Didn't want him to see you like this. As if you weren't embarrassed already.

He brushed his lips to your knuckle and you blushed, hint of a smile on your face. "Morning, Sunshine," he said.

"You shouldn't be here," you said, not opening your eyes. "I am sure you must have better things to do than to sit with me."

He sighed and took your hand into his, intertwining your fingers. "You know there is no where else I'd rather be, my sweet."

You sighed, opening your eyes and found his hazel eyes looking at you full of love. His face broke out into a grin and you couldn't help but return it.

Things with Remus had been kind of... sudden. Well, at least the pining - as your friends called it - had been. You would steal glances from across the table, your cheeks turning red whenever your eyes made contact. Those glances turned into staring and you knew you were done for. Once, he had caught you staring and offered you a smile. You swore you had fainted mentally. He smiled at you in the hallways, in the library, during classes, in the common room and you always smiled back.

You even made small talk every once in a while. That could have been more if you wouldn't have been such a fumbling mess. The way his eyes turned lighter in the sunlight, the way his sandy brown hair stuck to his forehead due to sweat... Merlin! You were absolutely smitten.

It was after class one day when you saw him being pushed by his friends in your direction and you smiled and walked up to him. "Everything alright?" You had chuckled.

"Uh, yeah," he had said, glaring at his friends behind his shoulder. "I - I was wondering if you... you can say no, but um, I was wondering if you wanted to go to Hogsmeade with me..."

Your brain had stopped working at his words and before you knew it, you had said no and ran away without seeing his reaction. When you paused to breathe, you realized what you had done. You didn't know if you wanted to cry or laugh. You wanted to go back and apologize but you weren't sure if he would agree now. He had no reason to, anyway.

Why would he go out with someone like you? Someone who ate too much and it showed. He would leave you soon because of it. And you'd understand. He was absolutely gorgeous. But you had been waiting for this for a long time. So you had walked back upto him and apologised. That way, you would get to be with him for at least some time. You waited for him to get tired and leave. He didn't.

You had soon realized that there was so much more to him than beauty and wit. You knew how kind and caring he was but there were moments where it seemed like he hated himself. That is how you had discovered his secret. You always doubted but you wanted him to tell you at his own time. He told you one night how he thought he didn't deserve you and while trying to convince you so, he had blurted out he was a werewolf and how his scars were no ordinary accidents. You had pulled him into you, holding him as he cried. You had kissed each of his scars and then his lips, telling him you loved him. You were inseparable ever since. You had decided that you needed to be beautiful for him. He deserved better and you would be that for him.

You started exercising, taking the longer ways to classes, eating healthier and stopped junk, oily food. But before you even realized, you had stopped eating. It began gradually when you took less than required food at dinner, then lunch and then you stopped those meals. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day and so you ate some of that, but it would be barely more than a morsel.

Whenever Remus would notice, you would say that you had eaten before and weren't hungry. He would seem unconvinced and tried to make you eat, but after a while, you would throw up. Every part of your body screamed for more, but you didn't give in. The only time you ever ate was on your dates with him, until that stopped, too.

You were weak with hunger. Extreme workout on almost no food was not a good thing. You had become cranky and irritable. So one day in the middle of the lesson, you fainted. And woke up in the hospital wing, with Remus' hand in yours.

"What's going on, sweetheart?" He asked.

"I was a bit unwell, that's all," you lied easily.

"Poppy told me it was because of weakness. You were not eating properly." He sighed.

Damn it. There was no point in hiding it now. "I just wanted to make myself better for you," you said softly.

He raised his brows.

"You are this absolute gorgeous person and I didn't want you looking bad because of me. So I was trying to get thinner." There. You had said it.

He was quiet for a while. "I - I cannot believe you think you are anything but perfect. I mean, look at me. I am - "

"But you're so amazing, Remus," you interrupted. "I have seen us together. I don't look good next to you. I -I just wanted to remove that disproportion," you voice broke.

He sighed deeply and cupped your face. "There is no disproprtion, y/n. I promise you. I have spent every single night thinking about how I got so lucky. You are so perfect thinking about it makes my heart physically hurt. Please don't do this to yourself. It has made you sick. I cannot see you like this."

You closed your eyes and leaned into his warm touch, a small tear rolling down. "I - don't know, Remus... but I know I love you," you said as he rubbed your cheek with his thumb.

"I love you so much, y/n." He breathed.

It took some time, but with his help, you started having your meals again. Your energy was back and so was your bubbly self.

It was in those moments you knew, that Remus was the one for you.

[mageglory]

So I have recently seen Dragon Age: Redemption with the amazing @dalishious and boy if it wasn't an experience. But while we were laughing and commenting the decision to make a rewrite of the serie came up and I offered myself for the job as a fun writing exercise to start my blog. So here we go. This is made with the assumption that we are in the middle of Dragon Age 2 Act 1, because that's what I understood?

Dragon Age: Redemption (Of A Plot)

-The movie still starts as it does in canon, with Tallis doing a voiceover while looking dramatic, because that's the type of things Tallis does.

-The first difference is when Sarebaas (the villain) walks in to interrogate a prisoner elf. Instead of doing weird unknow magic, Sarebaas cut the elf palm and uses his blood to compel the elder elf to talk. So we estabilish a familiar narrative element since the start and don't have to suffer bad visual effects because blood magic is incospicuos

-Tallis still gets told by the qunari that she is Tallis again and there is a mission for her ecc, but the qunari also add that they intend to destroy the Sarebaas once reunited because he got corrupted by staying away from the Qun. They have no idea of Sarebaas plans, they just want to follow the Qun and would kill him even if he was loyal. (As seen in DA2)

-Tallis meets Cairn (the Templar) while handling the racist asshole with the necklace of elven ears and Cairn does his "leave him be he is my prisoner in the name of the Chantry". Cairn doesn't show any concern that the guy Tallis is handling has literal *elven ears* as a necklace, only that it's only his right to apprehend him and for separate reasons.

-Tallis mocks him for being a good church little soldier, that's fine. But she doesn't tell him she's qunari (why the fuck my Hawke wasnt informed but this bitchy Templar yes Tallis) and doesn't propose to work together at all. Cairn treathens Tallis, saying that Knight-Commander Meredith told him to recover the "escaped apostate" immediately and he has the authority to arrest her if she doesn't collaborate. He's the one who wants to "work together" but at HIS terms.

-Tallis quickly makes some cool rougue move and ends up with her daggers at Cairn troath, before telling him to say to Meredith hello and knocking him down. Then, with the informations she got from Necklace Racist GuyTM she leaves for the Dalish Camp. Since this is Kirkwall and there shouldn't be more than one dalish clan for area, the clan we meet is actually Clan Sabrae.

-While she is with the dalish, Tallis hears some yelling and sees Cairn somehow found her. She asks him how and he says that before being a templar he was helping his father, who used to hunt for their village, so he knows how to follow tracks and followed her here. She compliments him for being "not totally usless" and decides to tell the dalish to let him in saying her "he is with me, we are all elves so I garantee for him" bit.

-No they are not going to have a romance.

-Clan Sabrae is NOT IMPRESSED and tells her that while they accept any elf as part of the people, Tabris is a guest and qunari and doesn't has the trust of the clan. Surely not enough to guarantee for a Templar. In the end they let Cairn in (because plot) but they tell him he will be guarded by their ex First, who's visiting, and will have to leave his weapons to them.

-Being an usless Templar, Cairn is all like "how dare you I work with the authority of the chantry, savages" until a dalish snaps at him that their patience is growing thin and he can enter weaponless or not enter at all. Cairn makes A Face and accepte, saying that he has to complete his mission and his superiors made clear the importance of the task (yes Meredith yelled at him. *world smallest violin plays*)

-The Keeper is busy doing... Something. Maybe she's talking to Audacity and it's an hint to the events of DA2, but they as said before they can talk to their ex First and also the actual First.

-Merrill cameo! :D But what the hell is she doing here? Well Merrill, because she is good like that, cares for her clan even if she's not part of it anymore and came to help when she heard what was going on. Hawke and co are busy on adventuring atm, so it's just her tiny badass self.

-Merrill obviously infodumps them about the mask of Fen'Harel, because Merrill is a badass. Instead of saying that they don't know what it does she says the Mask has many powers and it was always treated carefully because you do not call the Dread Wolf without risks. She says usually the Mask was used to amplify the power of a mage wearing it in moment when there was great need of consulting the Fare.

-Cairn probably says some shit about the mask having to be destroyed or demons but let's just assume that's 90% of his dialogue and ignore him. Maybe Merrill gives him a verbal burn, she's good at that.

-There is still a missing mage from the clan, the elf who was interrogated by Sarebaas at the start and he was Keeper Marethari's *brother*, but was took away from the Templars. (Or hell even just a respected magical elder, as you want)

-They also talk to the new First of the Clan after Merrill left, and it's our boy Josmael *immediate applaues*. Josmael says all he says in canon and how Sarebaas kidnapped his beloved while stealing the mask the clan. He teams up with Cairn and Tallis to rescue her. We also discover that he's one of the few people in the clan who stil likes Merrill and since she left and he was made the new First he has been anxious about having to fill her hyper-competent shoes.

-Yeah that was just me using the movie to give Merrill a friend in her people so what.

-Merrill says she has to return to the city but tells Josmael to keep her updated and he thanks her for caring.

-Cairn and Tallis say to Josmael that he cant come cuz they can't babysit him to which he answers with gentle determination that he doesn't need any babysitting and shows him magic.

-Cairn can't work with apostates blablabla.

-Tallis calls out Cairn for his anti-magic sentiment and says her "people" don't judge magic (which is bullshit but from her pov is the truth). Then she stabs Josmael to make him heal himself and prove himself to them.

-I take a pause because the water in the bath is getting cold and this post is getting too long, so i'll post this rewrite in parts.

[moonlit-han]

part i: he came in through the bathroom window

genre: college au, neighbor au, fluff, humor pairing: femme reader x 3racha in poly relationship part word count: 5k part warnings: suggestive, alcohol consumption, explicit language request: yes and no~ a/n: this is in no way represents stray kids or bang chan, seo changbin, and han jisung, as it is a work of fiction. and to my readers: this is the first part in a series that’s rather dear to my heart, and while i’m not sure how long it’ll end up being at the moment, i hope you enjoy it!

✧ masterlist & tag list info in bio ✧

↠↞

Just before your final year of college, you moved into a new apartment—well, your part of a shared house that had been made into several apartments. There was another one on the ground floor with yours, and then two upstairs. It was clean, with lovely light and a surprisingly nice kitchen. Your bedroom was nicely proportioned, too, with amazing closet space. The bathroom adjoined your neighbor’s, and there was even a little door that connected the two, for some reason. You quickly found that you had to leave the window open, even just a crack, to air out the room—an old house meant no ventilation fan. Occasionally, the proximity to your neighbor made it a little weird when you ended up taking a shower at the same time because he sang in the shower. On more than one occasion, you had to stop yourself from joining in.

You later found out that said neighbor was a music student at the same university as you, and you were sure you would have never met him if he hadn’t been your neighbor. He didn’t hang out with the same people as you, didn’t have any of the same classes, seemed to spend all his time shut up in his apartment occasionally strumming on a guitar, and was just generally an introvert. He did seem to have two best friends whose laughter you heard through the walls on a regular basis.

On the second day you lived there, a Friday, he knocked on your door, a mango in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other. 

“Hi, I’m Jisung,” he chirped. “I live next door. I brought you a house-warming gift—sorry it isn’t fancier. Hope you like it!” Jisung thrust the wine and mango into your surprised hands and then darted away to the other side of the house before you could even invite him in. You just stood there for a solid two minutes, staring into nothing with the mango and bottle of wine.

Wow, he was hot. Shit.

For the rest of the day, you went about your business, unpacking and arranging your things. The bottle of wine drew your eye but you resisted temptation, knowing that you wouldn’t get anything done if you opened it in the mid-afternoon. Occasionally, you heard music or slightly worrying thumps from Jisung’s apartment. But, you’d only just moved in and didn’t know him well enough to feel comfortable going to check on him. Surely he was fine, right?

Around 6 pm, you gave in and got the bottle of wine. Rummaging in one of the boxes still lounging on the kitchen floor, you found a wine glass, and miraculously, the bottle opener, too. As you poured out the liquid, it smelled fruity and a little sweeter than you normally liked wine, but it was a gift and you’d been working all day. You couldn’t pass up free alcohol. And perhaps because you’d been moving in all day, the wine tasted delicious and you soon poured yourself another glass. Thinking there had to be a reason for Jisung including a mango, of all things, with the wine, you sliced it and ate a few pieces in between sips of wine. The combination was perfect, and you wondered how Jisung had discovered such a lovely pairing.

As you settled in for evening, your thoughts strayed to your new neighbor. He seemed nice enough, albeit a bit shy, and was thoughtful enough to bring a housewarming present. That had to count for something. But what you couldn’t get out of your head was just him—the way his eyes sparkled with mischief, the way his hair swooped around his face. And with the hoodie that practically swallowed him whole, Jisung was absolutely the cutest, most handsome guy you’d ever seen. 

Pausing the show you were watching on your computer, you had to take a few deep breaths to calm your racing heart. You’d only just met the man, and you hadn’t even said anything! How could you be falling for him already? Heck! Giving up completely, you decided to go to bed . . . on the sofa you were currently occupying because you hadn’t set up your bed yet.

 ↠↞

Three months later, you were successfully moved in and your classes were in full-swing. You’d seen Jisung a few times as you came and went from your apartment, but you hadn’t really talked much. You were okay with that, though—classes were busy and it wasn’t as if there was some mystical Book of Rules for New Neighbors that you had to read and follow directions from. When you did talk, though, he was perfectly nice, making sure to ask how you were doing and actually listening to what you had to say—a rare quality, you’d found. He always gave you a toothy grin that seemed to light up his whole body, too.

Your door knocker barely ever got used, which was why when very loud knocking echoed through your apartment on Saturday, you were sure the apocalypse was coming. Cautiously, thinking of all the bad things that could happen if the person on the other side of the door meant you harm, you opened your front door. Revealed on the threshold was Jisung, along with two other young men who could only be the best friends you heard so often. 

“Hey, Y/N,” Jisung said, moving slightly to the side so you could see his companions. “So, I figured I’d introduce you to my friends, since they’re around a lot. Also, I usually ask one or both of them watch the apartment when I’m gone sometimes.”

“Oh. Okay,” was all you could manage while being stared at by three highly attractive young men.

“Can we . . . come in?” Jisung asked hesitantly.

“Um, yeah sure,” you said, blinking, and moved out of the way.

So that was how you ended up with Jisung and his two best friends lounging on the couch in your apartment. They seemed perfectly at home, not noticing or simply not caring about the mess of books and mugs on your coffee table, nor the—

Oh shit, the laundry. 

Your laundry—underpants, bras, and all—was hanging on a drying rack in the corner of your living room under the window. You scurried over to the rack and quickly threw a towel, which had been catching any rain that happened to fall on your windowsill, over the clothes. Turning round, you found the guys looking at you. You smiled nervously, knowing you were blushing.

Jisung put his head in his hands. You felt like doing the same thing just then.

“So, let me guess,” said the one sitting on Jisung’s left, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. “You’re name’s Reina, right? Since you’re lovely as a queen?”

You burst out laughing. You couldn’t believe someone had actually just used such a ridiculous pick-up line on you. “Sorry to disappoint,” you said, still giggling. “My name’s Y/N.”

“Oh well,” Chan said in mock-sadness, “that’s a pretty name, too. Just about as pretty as you!”

“Chan, fucking hell, man,” Jisung groaned. “Can you not flirt with every single person I introduce you to?”

“Sorry, ’Sung.” He still winked at you, though.

“Yeah. Okay.” Jisung addressed you again. “So this,” he pointed at the one he’d called ‘Chan,’ “is Chan. And the other dork who insists on being friends with me is Changbin. They’re also studying music composition and production.”

“Nice to meet you. And honestly,” you added conspiratorially, “I don’t understand why you’d want to be around Jisung either. Did you know he sings in the shower?”

Now it was Chan and Changbin’s turn to burst out laughing, falling onto the sofa’s arms.

“Jisung, your neighbor’s cool!” Changbin chuckled once he got himself under control. “Why didn’t you introduce us sooner?"

Jisung blushed faintly and grumbled something about not getting the chance. He’s really cute when he blushes, you thought.

“But yeah, we’re the bane of the Music Department’s existence,” Changbin said cheerfully. His voice was slightly husky, but somehow melodious, too.

“Just call us 3racha—because we’re spicy like Sriracha sauce!”

“Chan!” Jisung hissed, shoving his friend but he couldn’t wipe the grin off Chan’s face. Even though he seemed determined to be the cheesiest person ever, you noticed that Chan had extremely cute dimples and kind eyes.

“Wow, you three really are something,” you observed, with only a hint of sarcasm tinging your voice. “Jisung, did you really just come over and insist on coming into my apartment just to introduce your friends? Or, did you need something?” It came out slightly harsher than you’d meant it, but still. He’d practically barged in!

“Um, yeah, pretty much,” Jisung said. “Like I said, I wanted you to at least know who the people coming and going were.”

“And if you ever need anything,” Changbin added, “we’ve got you.”

“Thanks?” you said, not quite sure how they’d be able to help you, since you’d a) only just met them, and b) didn’t have any way to contact them. Although, Changbin did have a quiet confidence about him that was actually quite reassuring.

Jisung sighed, a little fidgety. “Well, I think we’ve trespassed on your time long enough. Let me know if the music’s too loud, okay?”

All four of you stood at the same time, Changbin leading the way to the door. “See you later, Y/N,” he said. “It was lovely to finally meet the person we’ve been hearing so much about.” And then he winked, too. 

What was with these guys and winking? you groused to yourself, trying to keep ahold of your expression. Wait, he didn’t mean… oh fucking hell. Judging by Changbin’s smirk that’s exactly what he’d meant. Why did the walls have to be so thin? Why!

Clearly exercising all the self-control he had, Chan just waved and said “Bye” on the way out. Jisung stopped as he was halfway out your door.

“Sorry this was unexpected, Y/N. I just thought you’d like to get to know them.” Jisung smiled a little sadly, and with that, carefully shut your door after himself.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you’d been holding just as a small scuffle broke out on your front step. You could almost hear Jisung berating his friends for something. Running a hand through your hair and massaging a temple in the process, you walked back over to sit on the couch. As you continued massaging your head, your eyes were caught by a folded piece of paper on the coffee table. 

Strange, you thought, I don’t remember ever having that pattern of note paper. You picked it up and opened it to see. . . 

Wow, the audacity.

One of the guys had left all three of their numbers for you on that slip of paper. Chan’s even had a heart next to his. They really had some nerve. Then again, you weren’t exactly complaining that three hot guys had just left you their numbers. You never knew when that could come in handy.

↠↞

You were finally snuggled in bed when you heard a crash. You went stiff for a moment, thinking through the various things that could have made that sound in your apartment. The sound seemed to have come from the bathroom. Okay. So, it might have been the mirror or a glass you forgot to move off the edge of the sink. It didn’t have to be the window. Besides, there hadn’t been any other noises after the first.

Reluctantly, you got out of bed and trudged to the bathroom to see what had happened. The shelf you’d put up two days ago lay on the floor surrounded by the shards of a vase you’d placed on said shelf just earlier that evening. 

“Damn it,” you muttered, bending to pick up the shelf and the larger pieces of glass. The weight of the vase must have been too much for the shelf, even though you’d properly attached it to the wall. You methodically cleaned up the glass and reattached the shelf to the wall, not putting anything on it this time in hopes that it wouldn’t fall again.

When you woke up, the shelf was still up and you felt rather smug for putting it back up properly. And when you got home, the shelf was still up, too.

That night, you took a lovely bath—taking care to crack the window to let out the steam—twisted your hair up into a comfortable top-knot, and then laid down on your bed with just yourself for company. You sighed gratefully. It had been a long week and you desperately needed some rest.

But, before you could even settle into the softness of your mattress, you heard the distinctive sound of shattering glass. From inside your apartment.

Fuck, not again.

You slipped out of bed, throwing on your sleep shorts and a loose tank top before padding out of your bedroom. Walking as silently as you could, by putting your the balls of your feet on the ground before your heels, you made your way to the bathroom.

You heard a thump just as you put your hand on the doorknob. If that shelf had fallen again…

It was not the shelf.

None other than Han Jisung was sprawled on your bathroom floor, arms and legs going everywhere, and a look of distinct puzzlement on his face. He shook his head, clearly having banged it on the floor. There were bits of broken glass scattered all around him, and you could see a light dusting of it in his hair.

“What the fuck?” you shrieked, backing up to just outside the door.

Jisung looked up at you and grimaced. “Hi?”

“What the hell are you doing in my bathroom? How are you in my bathroom? You had better have a damn good explanation, Han Jisung.” You couldn’t believe it. You’d thought Jisung was nice, that he was normal. But this? Sneaking into your bathroom at 12:30 am? That was just too much. Only a creep would do that.

Jisung scrambled onto his knees, his back to the wall. Under the window. The window that had just been broken. “I can explain!” he said, hands going up in front of him as his shoulders shrugged, as if expecting a blow. 

“You’d better talk fast,” you said, your voice dangerously low. 

“So, like a dumbass, I forgot my key.” He gulped, then took a breath. “And the guy who lived here before you used to let me come through here when I forgot my key because there’s the connecting door.”

You glanced at said door, which you’d assumed was sealed permanently. Apparently not. You glared at Jisung, who continued.

“Um, I thought I’d just climb in and go through the door. I didn’t mean to break the glass, I promise! My foot just got stuck and so I kind of tripped through the window, if that makes sense? I’m so sorry, Y/N! I thought I’d told you about the whole window thing!” Jisung’s face was screwed up like he might cry, his whole body tense as he made himself as small as he could.

You almost felt sorry for him. Almost. But, you didn’t say anything, waiting for Jisung to provide more of an explanation.

“I— My front windows don’t open and the back and side ones open onto the hill, so there’s nowhere I can use to climb into my own apartment. That’s the only reason this has happened. Really, I’m sorry!”

“So,” you said, hands on your hips, “you’re telling me that you used to climb through this window whenever you forgot your keys.” Jisung nodded. “Did you ever think of making of copy of the key and hiding it under a rock or something?” You were in utter disbelief—how hadn’t he done that? Or given Chan and Changbin keys? You mentally rolled your eyes.

“Shit,” Jisung lamented. “No, I hadn’t thought of that. Like I said, he just let me come in this way and it seemed to work fine. Plus, I don’t think the landlord would like us making copies of the keys, right?”

“Jisung, right now that’s the least of your worries. Please remember that you’re sitting on my bathroom floor. At 12:45 am. I was in bed!” You sighed loudly. Jisung just looked so dejected, you couldn’t stay angry at him for long. “For fucks sake, come here,” you said, reaching out a hand.

He took it, careful not to step on any broken glass from the window, and let you pull him up. His hands were calloused from playing the guitar. And suddenly, Jisung was very close to you. Very close. You could see how long his eyelashes were and the place where he must bite his lip when he’s nervous—you could smell his shampoo. You were also all too aware of just how thin your tank top was, and, it would seem, so was Jisung. You crossed your arms, hoping he’d just think you were cold from the breeze coming in the open window.

“I’ll contact the landlord tomorrow and say I was playing baseball or something and accidentally hit a ball through the window,” he said quickly, stepping back and trying not to look any lower than your face.

“Okay,” you replied, heartbeat faster than you’d care to admit. “Thanks. Now please get out of my bathroom, Jisung. I really do want to go to bed.”

“Yeah, sorry. Really, Y/N. I’m so sorry about this. I’ll— I’ll go get some cardboard and tape to cover the window. I’m sorry!” Jisung seemed like he would start rambling wildly any moment now.

“Just go back to your apartment. I’ll take care of the window, okay?” you tried to be as firm as you could, but Jisung could do sad puppy eyes better than anyone you’d ever met. Dear god, this boy… You gave in. After all, it would be one less thing for you to do. “Fine, Jisung. You can patch the window. Do it quickly, since I want to go to bed.”

With a soft, apologetic smile, Jisung went to the half-door next to your bathroom cabinet. After a moment of him fiddling with the latch, the door swung inward to reveal a small space through which he could crawl. Sighing, Jisung bent down and looked up at you. It did not escape your notice that this was the second time that night that you’d seen Jisung on his knees. 

“Again, I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I’ll be right back to fix the window—just go back to bed.”

Before you could respond, Jisung was crawling forward into the slightly dingy area between your apartments.

↠↞

Jisung did, indeed, take care of the window getting fixed. When you went out to check how it looked, you noticed a conveniently placed log that would make it much easier to, say, climb through the window above. You estimated the height from the ground to the windowsill, and realized that Jisung would have had to jump and then pull himself up just with the strength in his arms in order to get through the window. Yes, the wood shingle siding provided fairly good footholds, but not that much. Damn, you thought appreciatively, he’s strong. You were suddenly glad for the chill in the air to cool your now too-warm face.

You found yourself thinking about Jisung at the most inconvenient times, such as in your lecture classes, and quickly realized that, even though you didn’t know him as well as you’d like, you had a crush on your neighbor. Strangely, you still hadn’t run into each other on campus, but you’d seen Chan and Changbin—in the distance and too far away to talk to. You weren’t sure what to make of the fact that you were into Jisung, but your daydreams had certainly become much more vivid.

That one night was just the first time of many that Han Jisung crawled through your window in the middle of the night. By the sixth time it happened, you decided to talk to Jisung.

You heard the familiar rattle of the window and immediately raced into the bathroom in time to help Jisung down. It was a bit sad to see him on the floor after he accidentally caught a piece of clothing, his backpack, or, one memorable time, an earring, on the window. You held out a hand to him, and he took it, hopping into the room like a lady exiting a carriage.

Holding Jisung’s hand was surprisingly nice. His grip was firm and comforting, as if he were transferring his warmth and affection—

Wait, affection? Huh . . .

You quickly dropped Jisung’s hand, but not after checking that his feet were planted on the ground.

“Jisung, why don’t you come into the living room, okay?” you said, hoping you didn’t sound nervous.

“Oh. Sure!” Jisung was clearly baffled, since you’d never done anything like this. Remembering to shut the window behind himself, he followed you into your apartment. By now, he should have been almost used to seeing you in your pajamas, but he wasn’t. Your tank tops left nothing to the imagination, which was maddening for him.

You pointed Jisung to the couch, and he took a seat, sitting with his back ramrod straight and an expectant look in his eyes. You couldn’t help but smile a little as you curled up on the other end of the couch. Jisung, who took this as encouragement, smiled back. 

“Jisung, I’ve noticed that you’ve come through this way once a week for over a month,” you said. “There’s no way you’ve actually lost your key every single fucking week. So, why have you been coming through into my apartment every week?”

You knew it sounded a little silly, but he had been appearing between 9:30 pm and 1:30 am every Friday. 

“Um, yeah. I may or may not be really bad at keeping my keys on me. Also . . .” Jisung’s voice trailed off so quietly that you couldn’t hear him properly.

“What did you say?” you asked.

“I’m really bad at keeping my keys on me?”

“No, the other part,” you said slowly.

“Damn, I was hoping you wouldn’t hear that,” Jisung grumbled.

“Jisung, what the hell?”

“I wanted to see you,” Jisung said and ran a hand through his hair, embarrassed.

You were stunned. It almost made sense—Jisung was clearly an introvert and seemed to be one of those people who would rather do something outrageous than actually have to talk to someone, much less someone they had a crush on. Neither of you had exactly made many other attempts to see or talk to each other, besides random meetings at the mailbox and leaving your apartments at the same time. Although, he had asked you to bring him soup when he got a cold in September, and you’d happily taken him some. Amazingly, the fact that he’d been all but sneaking into your apartment for the last six weeks didn’t bother you as much as you thought it would. That, you realized upon later reflection, probably had something to do with your crush on him.

“You . . . wanted to see me?” you asked, voice soft. You barely noticed as you uncurled your legs and shifted closer to Jisung. Your hands rested on the upholstery beside you. 

“Yeah.” Jisung had moved closer, too, and now you were sitting side-by-side, facing each other.

“But why?”

“Because,” Jisung said as he reached out and linked his pinky finger with yours. You nearly jumped, the contact seeming like a spark leaping from him to you. “Well, you’re beautiful and kind, and I’d like to get to know you better. And whenever I hear you laugh at whatever silly thing you’re reading or watching, I end up giggling because it’s the best sound I’ve ever heard. Did I mention you’re beautiful?”

You were silent for a minute, staring into space level with Jisung’s elbow; he shifted nervously but you didn’t let go of his hand. Your mind raced nearly as fast as your heartbeat.

“Kiss me, then,” you said, and Jisung’s eyes went wide. “Kiss me, Jisung.”

Jisung hesitantly placed his hand on your waist as you gently cupped his cheek—you could feel his pulse jumping in his neck. His touch was light as a feather and you could feel his hand shaking, even as he drew you closer. He leaned forward at the same time as you did, too, and a dull ache spread through your forehead where it had hit Jisung’s.

You crinkled your nose, leaning your head against the couch, and rubbed your brow.

“Oh my god, Y/N, are you okay?” Jisung said, not even thinking as he ran his hand over what was now a slightly red spot of your forehead.

You giggled and said, “I’m fine. Are you okay, though?”

“I’ve had worse,” Jisung chuckled. He also leaned against the couch, resting his arm on its back as, throwing all caution to the winds, he traced the arch of your cheekbone with a fingertip. “Here,” he said as he leaned toward you again and placed a kiss on your forehead. 

“Aw, you’re too sweet,” you said. Jisung was directly in front of you and you thought, Well, since he’s already this close. So, you leaned in and placed kiss after kiss down his jaw. Still hesitant, Jisung turned his head slightly and brushed his lips against yours. It was only for a second, but you immediately caught his lips with yours, wanting more. As you took the lead, Jisung relaxed into the kiss. His lips were warm as you renewed the kiss over and over. 

You took a breath, smiling and moving your free hand to Jisung’s hair—It really was as soft as you’d always expected. He hummed contentedly, leaning his head back slightly into your hand.

“I’ve been waiting to do that for so long,” Jisung breathed, letting out what might have been a laugh or a sigh. 

“Me, too,” you said, still carding your fingers through his hair.

“And now you’re too far away,” Jisung pouted, and slanted his lips to yours again. Continuing to twine your fingers around his hair, you let your other hand run over Jisung’s arms and chest, then down to wrap around his waist. As you did, Jisung held your hip and pulled you closer so you were nearly sitting in his lap. Not that you minded. You transferred a hand to his shoulder so you wouldn’t topple over. Jisung swiped his tongue along your bottom lip and you gladly opened to him. He tasted of the vanilla chapstick he clearly used, and as you explored each other’s mouths, you slipped your hand under the hem of his shirt. 

The feeling of your hand on his skin nearly made Jisung faint from surprise and he gasped against your lips before kissing you even more enthusiastically. After long moments of wonton kissing, your arm ached a little from resting on the back of the couch and, reluctantly, you broke the kiss. Jisung’s lips were very red and swollen.

“Are you okay?” Jisung asked, worried as he pulled back, just in case. You didn’t let go of him, though.

“Can we change positions a little, Ji?” The nickname had just slipped out and you didn’t realize you’d call him that until you saw his expression.

“Of course.” Jisung paused, not exactly sure what to do next. “Um, what do you want to do?”

“Well,” you pretended to think for a moment, “we could lay down a bit?”

Jisung blushed a little at the implication that hung in those words. “That’s,” he began and cleared his throat. “That’s just fine with me.” 

Taking a deep breath, Jisung slouched back onto the arm of the couch, bringing you with him. You had to do some scooting yourself, and soon found yourself straddling his legs. Jisung reached up and pulled you down to him, running his hands up and down your back as he did so. You rested your forearms on the couch behind Jisung and brought your lips back to his, leaving little kisses around his lips before fully kissing him again. Kissing him was like finding a lucky penny: unexpectedly sweet and such a simple yet exciting thing that you couldn’t help but want to leap with joy. All of a sudden, a giggle burbled up out of you and you hid your face in the crook of Jisung’s neck. 

“What?” Jisung asked.

“Nothing,” you mumbled.

“No, really. What is it?” Jisung was quite curious now.

You lifted your head, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. “I kind of want to see you shirtless now,” you admitted and immediately burrowed your head in his shoulder again.

Jisung laughed, really laughed, as he said, “Yeah? Well, I can’t take my shirt off with you on top of me.”

Still quite embarrassed that he’d even considered what you’d said, you sat up and Jisung lifted the hem of his t-shirt. You couldn’t help yourself once his shirt was off: you whistled, murmuring, “Holy shit.” While you’d guessed that Jisung had nice muscles, you weren’t expecting him to have abs for days and killer arms, not to mention perfectly proportioned pecs.

Jisung smiled, a little embarrassed. “Um, like what you see?”

“Oh, you have no idea,” you said, and trailed a finger down his chest. Jisung let out a shaky breath and you felt a hard pressure underneath your bum. Your pajama pants felt quite thin at the moment. Swooping down, you captured his lips again and continued to run your hands over every inch of him you could reach. Jisung moaned every time your hands returned to his chest, and he slipped a hand down to your bum to hold your hips to his. Your kisses were soon so heated they were almost desperate, your hands ranging over each other’s bodies as the warmth inside grew.

“Jisung,” you said, breathing hard. You sat up, realizing, belatedly, that your top was dangerously low now. “If we don’t stop now—”

“I don’t want to stop,” he whispered. “But if you do, we will. It’s okay, I promise.”

Jisung was so gentle and careful, you could almost cry. “Oh, Ji,” you murmured, and kissed him again, lingering at his bottom lip before pulling back. “I don’t want to stop either.”

Jisung craned his neck to kiss just below your ear. “Then we won’t.” As you continued kissing, any hopes of going back to sleep disappeared like mist in early morning sun. But you didn't want to go to bed, not when Jisung’s hands were slipping under your tank top.

[oh-boy-me]

Could I get a headcanon of the demon boys' reaction to MC who is surprisingly string for their size or build?

I’m going back to some older asks--sorry it took so long to get to this!

Lucifer

“Humans are weak,” he thought.  “MC needs my help to survive,” he thought.  Haha bitch no they don’t.

The first time Lucifer sees MC lift something they really don’t look like they should have been able to carry, he’s about to rush over to take it from them.  But, seeing them not struggle at all, he’s so shocked that he ends up cemented in place.  He was gaping a little bit, but good luck getting him to admit that part.

He’s never going to truly get used to it, but he does appreciate the extra pair of hands around the house.  However, MC has to be really careful about what they take up.  Helping Lucifer move some heavy boxes because there’s a lot of them and it’ll save time?  Sure thing.  Helping Lucifer move a heavy box because it looked heavy?  His pride won’t let them get away with that.

On the bright side, Mammon’s suddenly pulling his weight around the house.  Lucifer can’t complain about that.

Mammon

Ok so what you do is set up an arm-wrestling stand and make mad bank and then

Mammon is in quite the pickle, because he keeps trying to show off to seem cool in front of his favorite human, but every time he offers to carry something they say they can do it and then actually can do it????  How is he supposed to look cool when they’re cooler?!

Maybe he’s being self-conscious, maybe it’s just an easy out, but he starts blaming MC’s strength for things that don’t make any sense.  “If it weren’t for MC and their dumb muscles, I wouldn’t have forgotten to buy eggs!”  Mammon, what are you talking about?

It’s not a problem, because literally everyone calls him out on how that’s bullshit and doesn’t make sense.

His quest to look cool in front of them never truly ends, so he’ll fight heavy lifting out of their arms and take care of it instead, under the guise of “you’ll hurt yourself” and “I’ve gotta protect my human.”

Leviathan

MC is lucky that Levi is technically still stronger than them, because that envious streak isn’t one that they’d want to have to deal with.

And since Levi is technically still stronger than them, we instead get the whiny, petty “why can they do that and I can’t?”  Maybe it’s because you haven’t exercised in 500 years, Leviathan.

He’ll beg them to share their secrets with him.  They’re human, right?!  It has to be easier than whatever it is that Beel does!  He wants to be stronger too, like the hero in I Want to Ask My Childhood Friend Out, but She Said She Would Only Date Me if I Won a Triathlon and I’ve Never Run a Day in My Life Because I Have Wings.

It’s definitely not because he wants to spend more time with them and hog their time and maybe see them in their element.  Nope.  No way.

Kind of wants to be carried by them, just once.

Satan

Little known fact about Satan: jars have a vendetta against him.  Or, at least that’s what he says.  In truth only about one in every ten jars he tries to open give him trouble, but when everything pisses you off that adds up to every single jar personally being out to get him.

And let me tell you, it doesn’t really make him feel better when sweet, unassuming MC is able to force it open when he wasn’t.

Oh but he’s not angry at them!  He’s just VERY angry at the jars.  Ok, well.  He’s a little angry at MC for one-upping him, but he controls himself because strong or not, MC is still human and he could snap them like a twig if he isn’t careful.

Moving forward, he appreciates that he can ask MC for help with lifting and the like instead of Mammon or Levi or, ex-father-but-not-really forbid, Lucifer.  But he’s not going to be direct about it.  He kind of just pointedly complains about it until MC gets the hint.

Low-key he also wants to see MC beat someone up (preferably not him).

Asmodeus

To say that Asmodeus finds that attractive would be an understatement.  Ooh, there’s just something about someone who could bench press you that’s so thrilling.

And to say that Asmo will walk anywhere ever again is a foolish assumption.  Have fun carrying him, MC.  He’s not very heavy, luckily, but he’s basically dead weight in their arms with how he drapes himself.  And knowing that MC can support his weight, he will jump into their arms without warning.  Or on their back.  Anywhere, really.

He’s also never lifting a finger again, so have fun with that as well, MC.

If anyone threatens him or gives him attitude, he’ll threaten them in return, saying that he has a really strong human.  And then he’ll actually call MC to try to get them to put Asmo’s money where his mouth is.  Please don’t humor him here, MC.

It all seems rather selfish, but Asmo really adores MC and their strength, and he makes sure he drowns them in compliments whenever he’s being a spoiled princess.

Beelzebub

Beel is as strong as he is because of exercise and dedication.  He breaks the assumption that he’s by default the second weakest of his brothers, so the fact that MC is also stronger than they look doesn’t surprise him all that much compared to the others.

(I feel like that’s a common thing with Beel--I guess he’s just good at accepting whatever new nonsense life throws at him lolol)

More importantly, though: does MC have a workout routine?  Because if they’re doing something to hide all that muscle in that body, Beel wants in on that secret.  Also he wants a workout buddy.

Can and will drag MC to the grocery store because that’s more bags of food to carry.

He can lift MC easily, but he’s excitedly looking forward to the day that MC can lift him.

Belphegor

The best word that Belphie can think of for this is “convenient.”  Because he’s light for his size, and MC could probably carry him as well.  And that means that finally--FINALLY--he has one more person he’s comfortable letting carry him to a better napping spot.  When Beel isn’t home it’s really tough for him, y’know?  Under the table isn’t fun, but no way in hell was he gonna let Levi pick him up.

Like Lucifer he’s a little bit like “what?  I thought humans were all baby.”  And yet he kind of thinks it’s cute?  MC is so… human.  But they can give a good fight.  Like a small bear.

He will bribe and dare MC to get into trouble with him.  “Hey MC, don’t you think that whole marble statue would look better in the middle of Lucifer’s study?  Right on his desk.  Or even better, let’s block the door.  Yeah, the feng shui of the room is all messed up and I think a giant statue in the way would really help.”

They’re both going to get in so much trouble but seeing Lucifer’s face is enough of a reward.

Masterlist

[h3l10tr0p3]

BNHA OVA: Make it! Do or Die Survival Training!

SPOILERS

So, the Class A students are training for their provisional exams and have to operate in an underground mall rescue mission which caved in due to an electric fire. Midoriya, Bakugou, Todoroki, Uraraka, Asui (I mean, Tsuyu), Kirishima, Kaminari, Yaoyaorozu, Iida and Tokoyami embark down the site when a secondary disaster seperates them.

The OVA most probably takes place between Deku's visit to Hatsume Mei's Studio and the second scene at Gym Gamma where Deku kicks away a boulder dislodged by Katsuki's AP Shot in his recently updated gear (which he wore in the OVA too). In the OVA, Deku's kicks are also shown to be choppy and he doesnt have precise control over it as he kept falling off the ice-raft when he kicked holes through the ceilings of B6 - B3.

This OVA was filled with student interactions and shippy goodness.

We had IidaMomo, IzuOcha, OchaTsuyu, BakuKami, BakuTodo KiriKami and even a Todoroki × Tokoyami (Todoyami? Tokoroki?) even a rare TodoKami moment! (Todoroki calls Kaminari by his first name, Denki!!)

But at the end of the day, the bkdk feels hit it home.

That's it. THAT'S THE OVA.

What blows my mind is that when the Next big three were at level B6, using the geyser to get up to ground level- Studio BONES could have easily made them shoot up to surface without stopping on B3 and injuring Kacchan.

But they did.

This whole OVA basically revolves around injuring Kacchan and the "Be my cane' dialogue and you caNnoT convince me otherwise.

Now to some it may seem out of character/chronologically dubious for Kacchan to relent to easily to Deku in this OVA considering that this took place before Deku v Kacchan 2, and the OVA clearly states that Aizawa was training the children for the oncoming Provisinal Liscence exams. It was only after Kacchan failed the Provisional exams did DvK2 happen.

But there is a very thin vein of appropriation which makes Kacchan's reaction to accepting Deku's help justified with the time line and it all comes down to Kamino.

Hailed as a championing Kiribaku moment, what is often overlooked in this arc is how Izuku gave up his chance to reach out to Katsuki because he was afraid if it were him, Katsuki would not accept his hand. His anguish is easily overshadowed by the success of the rescue stunt.

Look at Deku in the second gif closely.

In the very last frame, his eyes are shadowed, like he is physically holding in the hurt at seeing how easily Kirishima can reach out to Kacchan again and again in a way Deku is not allowed to.

And it is my belief that Katsuki saw that look.

So, Kamino Arc comes and goes. Students are gearing up for Provisional Exams as shown in the OVA and near the end, there comes a time where Katsuki, injured, clearly needs assistance and this is what Deku says.

"I want to save you too"

Kacchan's response to this is clearly unprecendented, and let's face it soft. Him getting a character development like this before DvK2 when he should be steeping in self-loathing for ending All Might and already suspecting that Deku has AM's power, sounnds a bit far-fetched but consider, obliquely, for one moment that Katsuki knows what Deku feels like.

If Katsuki knows Deku wanted to save him badly back at Kamino, that changes things. It probably hints that Katsuki is aware that Deku relinquished the role of taking his hand to Kirishima fearing he wouldn't take Deku's. Katsuki understands that Deku was deeply hurt by this. So when Deku says "I want to save you too" it's like a callback to Kamino and what he means is -

I want to save you like Kirishima is allowed to do.

Katsuki's "I refuse" and consequent (meme-worthy) "Be my cane" dialogues have a lot more weight than comic relief in that context. He is acknowledging Izuku's help not only as a stepping stone, but also accepting it in a non-personal nature- it's like it is an integral part of his growth that he accepts the only way he knows how to-i.e. on his terms.

But the very act of accepting at this stage of their relationship speaks VOLUMES of how Katsuki percieves Izuku and cares for him beyond his brittle and bruised ego. Because despite the misconception Katsuki holds that Izuku is always looking down on him (right uptil the big fight in DvK2 I might add), Katsuki understands and acknowledges Izuku's hurt at not being the one able to save him. Most importantly,

He sees the anxiety Deku suffers from the mere thought of having lost him again.

By the way, the last time Deku looked even remotely concerned about Kacchan's well-being with such open anxiety on his face looked pretty much like this-

(Yeah...it did not go well)

Add that to the fact that Kacchan probably knows that Deku pushed Kirishima to save him when he blamed himself most (despite having nearly broken his whole fucking skeleton in the process) for not being able to rescue him at the Summer Camp itself.

Kacchan clearly understands the lengths Deku is prepared to go, and will go through again to see him safe and secure. Regardless of what kind of hit his ego takes from Kamino (which is compounded by his failure at the Provisional Exams), being saved by Deku in the wake of these realizations clearly surpasses the need to cling to his own pride in the OVA

And that Alone is a testament to the fact how Katsuki's character has been slowly and surely maturing even before DvK2 which makes him such a well-developed character. He is not completely without empathy Pre-DvK2.

He shows it, but sparingly. He convinces himself that he is saving people like Kirishima, Kaminari, Todoroki and Deku in the OVA because he doesnt 'want to owe it to anybody', but he has already started to internalize this attitude of 'Save to Win' this early in the series.

And the biggest proof in the OVA, of how Katsuki has taken the Kamino experience to heart is when Katsuki persists on the mission to save the dummy despite a secondary disaster complicating their exercise. In a way, It is a catharsis. It is Katsuki's re-enactment of Kamino from Deku's perspective, even if it is to save just one lifeless dummy from debris. He is not going to slack off.

(Funny how, here too, the one needing to be saved was ultimately saved by Kirishima)

He has already started to show (and accept) his dedication to saving as well as winning well before AM gives him the "Save to Win. Win to Save" talk, which cements the vector of his future development in the series.

All things considered, is this OVA a valuable addition to the main story of bnha?

Well, depends on the viewer. It has lots of cool highlight on character dynamics, character focus and fleshes out how the next Big Three seamlessly coordinate with each other. (Also shipping material) However in my humble opinion it seems to make the transition of Kacchan's char development easier for the anime-onlys or the anime-and-movie-onlys, so that the Class Exercise arc doesnt seem like a drastic change in his motivations.

(As if we need any more convincing how in-character it is for Bakugou to want to Save as much as he wants to Win)

[kinglazrus]

Love Me, Don’t Hug Me

Phic phight 2020

Submitted by @sailor-toni: Danny hates being touched. Paulina loves to show her affections. How will the two of them make this relationship work.

Summary: When it comes to Danny Fenton, Paulina is sure about three things: he's almost always injured, he's pretty damn mysterious for a loser, and he has this annoying habit of getting stuck in Paulina's mind. Oh, and she just might, maybe, possibly have a crush on him.

Edit: I’ve been informed this phic is too powerful for tumblr and keeps crashing the app. Here are the links to [FFN] and [AO3]

Word count: 23499

Paulina was used to boys she barely knew coming up to her and asking her out. At first, she enjoyed the attention. Constantly being told how pretty she was, getting gifts, and trinkets, and praises showered upon her. Everyone said she must have liked it, so she did.

Sometimes, it really was nice, when the boys were sincere. She teased them, and smiled at them, and led them along like lost puppies. They made her feel good.

The other boys didn't. Every day, the came to her. At lunch, at the mall, on her way home from school. They pulled her out of conversations, took her away from her friends, distracted her from whatever she actually cared about. She got everything from arrogant smirks to smarmy grins, masks of undeserved bravado. She didn't give them an inch, saying no every time.

But they were persistent. They pestered and prodded, pestering her with pick-up lines and pet names, as if all they had to do was say pretty one more time and she would finally change her mind. She still said no, and their sweet words would turn bitter.

"Fine, bitch," they would hiss, their adoring gazes turning to seething glares.

Paulina saw no difference between either stare. Whether it was full of love or hate, any unwanted gaze made her skin crawl. She knew, unabashedly, that she was pretty. Being pretty made her feel good. But their stares made her feel ugly.

Most boys gave up after the second no. Most.

Paulina stared resolutely ahead as the senior leaned against the table, chin in his hand, giving her a flirtatious grin. Usually, only boys in her grade or the next grade up asked her out. Having a senior's attention made her feel strange. Flattered, but also uncomfortable. The fact that he wouldn't take the hint set her on edge.

"Come on, babe, just give me a chance," he said, sliding onto the bench next to her.

Paulina shuffled down, closer to Star.

"Just say yes to the guy and he'll leave." Dash didn't even look up. He and Kwan were too busy flicking a piece of pizza crust back and forth, trying to break through each other's defence.

Contrary to Dash, Kwan's eyes lifted every few seconds in a nervous glance before dipping back down. Every time he looked up, Paulina thought he was going to say something. Every time he didn't, she felt like crying, or hitting him. She wasn't sure which.

"I'm sorry, I don't like older guys," Paulina said. She refused to let her voice shake, and hated that she needed to steady it at all. This should have been no different from any other boy she had to brush off this year, but he just wouldn't give up.

"Oh, yeah? You don't really know until you try."

Dash's words echoed in Paulina's head. Maybe he was right. If she said yes, the senior would go away. How bad could one date be? He was eighteen. He should know how to treat a girl. He was practically an adult, which meant he must be right. Right?

The senior's hand slid off the table, inching toward Paulina's thigh.

Before he could touch her, Star slipped an arm around Paulina's waist and pulled her back. Leaning too far over, the senior fell forward with a yelp, palm smacking against the floor as he tried to catch himself. A scruffy shoe immediately came down on his fingers.

Paulina blinked at the familiar red sneaker. Looking up, she found Fenton, scrawny, limp Fenton, standing on the senior's hand with a pissed off expression that looked so foreign on his face, but somehow fit it so well.

"Hey, that's not cool. She said no," Danny said. The senior jerked, trying to pull his hand out from under Danny's foot, but Danny didn't budge.

"What the hell. Get off me, man," the senior said. "This ain't your problem."

"You're making it my problem," Danny said. At the same time, Paulina shouted, "It is his problem!"

Both boys glanced at her, equally confused. Danny looked bewildered, like he hadn't expected to be addressed at all. The senior's eyes jumped between Paulina and Danny, uncertainty and then understanding filling his gaze.

"I can't go out with you because I have a date with Danny." Paulina grabbed Danny's hand and yanked him close, dragging him off the senior's hand. Danny stiffened, but Paulina ignored it in favour of making sweet eyes at him. "Isn't that right?"

"Uh... yes?" Danny said. Paulina nodded at him. "Yeah! Yeah. It's not cool to steal someone else's girl." He grimaced at his own words, shooting Paulina an apologetic glance.

She shrugged. She didn't like it when guys talked about girls like they owned them, but she would forgive Danny for this one slight.

"Okay, geez. You didn't have to make such a big deal about it." The senior stood, rubbing his sore fingers, and left without much fuss after that. Although he did shoot Paulina one last predatory look.

Paulina did her best to brush it off. The thought of his eyes on her made her feel gross. As soon as she got home, she was going to take a long shower. Remembering she still had Danny's wrist in her hand, she let go, wincing at the fading imprints her fingers left behind. She hadn't realized she grabbed him that hard.

"Sit down, Fenton," Star said.

Danny started. That startled look, like he didn't expect anyone to talk to him, crossed his face again. "What?"

"Sit. Down." Taking her arm from Paulina's waist, Star lightly smacked Danny's back and motioned to the now empty space on the bench.

Paulina frowned at Star, raising her eyebrows in a silent question. Star ignored her, giving Danny another insistent slap. He glanced over his shoulder, back toward his friends, shrugged helplessly, and sat down.

"Why am I still here?" he asked.

"Because that creep didn't leave the cafeteria." Star jerked her chin towards the senior, who was taking his seat a few tables down from them. "If you leave, he might figure out Paulie was lying, and come back. This is a one-time deal, got it?"

Danny nodded. "Got it."

"You okay, Paulie?"

Self-conscious, Paulina wrapped her arms around her exposed midriff. After a moment, she nodded, squeezing Star's hand. "Yeah, I'm okay. It's not like it's a first time that's happened." She waved dismissively.

"Paulina..." Kwan wrung his hands, worrying his lip. "I'm sorry. That guy, Keith, he's a friend of my brother's. And I've known him since I was little, you know? He's not a bad guy. But I should have said something."

Paulina's anger toward him waned. "Yeah, I get it. It's still not okay, though."

Dash scoffed and leaned forward. "You guys are being stupid. You should have just said yes. Probably broke his heart or something."

Danny sneered, rising to meet Dash in the middle of the table. "You know that from experience?"

"Shut up, Fenton."

"Exactly how many times did you ask my sister out even though she kept saying no?" Danny started counting off on his fingers. "Let's see, the football game, homecoming, the winter formal, yesterday."

Dash grabbed Danny's shirt and got up in his face. "What do you care, dweeb?"

"I care because you're creeping on my sister." Danny's hand hovered over Dash's wrist.

"Let it go, Dash," Paulina snapped, smacking the boys' hands. "You look like idiots."

Dash glared at her, but listened, dropping Danny's collar and sitting back with a huff. In an instant, Danny seemed to lose whatever boldness made him stand up to Dash, and he laughed nervously. Fixing his collar, he leaned back.

Paulina gave him an appraising look. They had gone to school together for years, but he never stood out to her. When they hit high school, he gave her the same heart-eyed stare all the boys did, like she was a pretty thing to be won. She intended to write him off after that. She never meant to pay attention to him, for any reason. But when he asked her to homecoming, and she saw how jealous that made Sam, Paulina couldn’t resist.

She was so tired of Sam being such a hypocrite, acting like she was so good all the time, as if she never did anything wrong. In Paulina's opinion, Sam needed to get over herself. And she deserved every bit of riling up Paulina could give her.

Homecoming night itself didn't have a strong place in Paulina's mind, most of it passing in a hazy blur. Still, something happened that night, something that changed Danny. He stopped looking at her like a trophy. He didn't stop staring at her completely, but there a new layer to his gaze after that. A sort of understanding, like he was the first person—outside Paulina's friends—to realize there was more to her than a pretty face.

He should have faded to the back of her mind. Don’t get Paulina wrong, he maybe have been better than the creeps that dogged after her, but he was still a loser. And yet, in spite of herself, she sometimes found herself staring back when Danny wasn't looking, although she never understood why.

"You know, you're alright, Fenton," Paulina said, surprising herself with her sincerity.

Danny gaped at her, mouth dropping open, eyes widening. The innocent surprise was kind of cute.

"Thanks, I guess?" he said.

"You're welcome." Paulina turned to her lunch, cafeteria pizza that had long since gone cold, and ate in peace.

—

Paulina was sore all over. Cheerleading practice had ended an hour ago, but every Tuesday she stayed on the field a little longer and got some extra exercise. Doing lunges, push-ups, and laps around the field, she liked to keep her arms and legs strong. Cheerleading required a lot of strength and control, and she had to stay in shape.

Some weeks, Star joined her, but that day she had to go home right after practice, leaving Paulina on her own. She may have gone overboard, hanging around almost half an hour longer than usual. It was easy to get lost in thought while she exercised.

Gathering her backpack from the bleachers, she wondered if she should change before going home. She definitely needed a shower. But, checking the time on her phone, she knew the gym, and therefore the changerooms, would be locked up by now. Resigned to walking home in her uniform, she headed toward the front of the school.

Just as she reached the sidewalk, the front doors burst open. Danny came trudging out, backpack dangling in his hand, sweater tied around his waist.

Paulina watched him. Two hours was a long time to hang around after school. He must have had double detention, a punishment often reserved for students who skipped class. Paulina hesitated for a moment before jogging over.

"Danny!" she called, waving.

Danny spun toward her. He made that adorable startled face again, this time with a soft blush creeping across his cheeks as he noticed her skirt and crop top. His eyes snapped up to her face and stayed there.

"Hey, Paulina. What's up?" He lifted a hand to scratch his chin, drawing Paulina's attention to a dark bruise blooming across his jaw. It hadn't been there yesterday at lunch, or even that morning when she saw him in English. Three thin scratches stretched over the bruise, cutting across his chin. She wondered what caused them.

Danny's nail caught on one of the scabs and he winced, quickly lowering his hand, tucking it into his pocket. He always seemed to be injured in some little way. A bruise here, a scratch there. Paulina remembered him limping down the hall on more than one occasion. An uncomfortable curiosity settled in her gut, a sort of sick fascination. She wanted to know what was hurting him so much.

"Uh, Paulina?" Danny reached out.

Paulina, startled, jerked away. Her cheeks burned as she realized she had been gawking at him. She quickly asked, "Are you doing anything right now?"

"No," he answered slowly, giving her a wary look. "Why?"

"I owe you a burger, for yesterday. I never actually thanked you for helping me."

"You want to thank me?" Danny frowned.

Paulina pursed her lips in annoyance. Was it really so hard to believe? Sure, she wasn't always the nicest to him, but she didn't actively antagonize him either.

Danny squinted at her, leaning forward. "Is that you, Kitty?"

Paulina bristled. "What did you just call me!"

"Sorry!" Danny scrambled back, hands raised in defence. "I didn't mean– I wasn't– there's just this ghost that likes to mess with me, okay? And she may have... overshadowed you... once..."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"It doesn't matter. Burgers?"

Paulina thought it did matter, very much, but she was willing to put it aside for now. Giving Danny a stern look, letting him know she wouldn't soon forget what he had said, she waved for him to come along and headed toward the Nasty Burger.

Silence followed them. Danny trailed a couple paces behind her, head down, so quiet that she had to glance back every few steps to make sure he was still following. The air between them felt fragile, as if whatever peace they had attained in this moment would shatter under the weight of a whisper.

Paulina, used to Star's constant chatter, detested the feeling. The next time she glanced over her shoulder, she fixed Danny with an exasperated stare. "You know, you don't have to walk behind me." She slowed her pace.

Danny's cheeks flushed again. Scurrying forward, he fell into step beside her, lengthening his stride to match Paulina's longer gait. He opened his mouth a few times, but ultimately didn't say anything, resigning himself to staring at the sidewalk.

It was obvious neither of them enjoyed the lack of conversation, feeling too awkward without it, but neither one was willing to say the first word. Paulina found a stubborn urge rising within her. If they were going to play this game, then she was determined to win. They sent each other calculating glances, measuring each other up. Paulina searched for a sign of the boy that had come to her rescue yesterday. A confident twist in his lips, a glint in his eye, anything hidden behind the nervous façade. She found nothing.

A skittering noise interrupted her thoughts. Looking down, she saw a pebble leaping down the sidewalk ahead of them. It rolled to a stop in the middle of Danny's path. When they neared it, he kicked it, sending it jumping forward again. On the third kick, it hit a crack in the sidewalk and skipped across the concrete, stopping in front of Paulina.

Before she could think about it, she hopped forward and knocked the pebble back toward Danny. He looked up, surprised, and smiled at her. Tentative, he kicked the pebble back.

Paulina didn't mind the silence so much after that. Their little game persisted—both games—all the way to the Nasty Burger as they passed the pebble back and forth, neither one uttering a word. Paulina found herself grinning as Danny booted the pebble, forcing her to sprint after it or else let it tumble off the edge of the sidewalk.

Catching it just in time, she kicked it as hard as she could. The pebble careened off the sidewalk, pinged off the metal pole of the Nasty Burger sign, and disappeared into the unkempt grass.

"Oh," Danny said, sounding as disappointed as Paulina felt.

"Yeah." Paulina searched the grass for a moment, desperately hoping to find the pebble. For a moment, she had been filled with a childish sort of joy, the same delight she felt as a little girl playing in mud puddles with her cousins. Nowadays, she preferred to stay clean and pretty, but there was something intoxicating about the untamed glee one could only get from simple games, like punting a pebble down a sidewalk.

Thinking of games, Paulina quickly backtracked. "I win." She turned a victorious grin toward Danny.

"What? No! You lost the rock. That means you lose," Danny said.

"I got the best kick; I think that means I win. But I wasn't talking about that. You spoke first."

Danny stared at her, eyes narrowing, then blowing wide as he realized what she meant. "No fair! I didn't realize that was a game, that means you can't win," he insisted.

"Oh, sure you didn't." Paulina tossed her hair over her shoulder and airily said, "You're just a sore loser." She sauntered toward Nasty Burger's front doors.

"No way. I'm actually very good at losing, you've seen me in gym class," Danny said. He jogged ahead, overtaking her, and held the door open. "Besides, I think losing the rock makes you the loser."

"Best kick!" Paulina sing-songed, ignoring Danny's excuses. He grumbled all the way up to the counter, but didn't try to defend himself again.

Ignoring the leer of the acne-riddled teen behind the counter, who had asked Paulina out on no less than four separate occasions, she nudged Danny's arm. "What do you want? I'm paying."

"You really don't need to," Danny said, already reaching for his wallet.

Paulina rounded on Danny. "Listen, Fenton. I don't like owing people. You helped me out, now let me say thanks."

Danny peered down at his wallet, eyeing the crumpled three dollars stuffed inside, and sighed. "Okay, fine. I'll just have a Meaty Melt and a Coke."

As Paulina went up to order, Danny hovered at her shoulder. She didn't pay much attention to him, too focused on ignoring the cashier's stares, but halfway through the exchange she caught Danny glaring over her shoulder. The cashier wilted and kept his eyes down after that.

"I hope you're not expecting another burger for that," Paulina said while they searched for a table.

Danny, balancing their tray on one hand, holding his soda in the other, blinked at her. "What? Why would I?"

"Huh." Paulina squinted at him. "You really don't expect anything, do you?"

"No? I actually didn't think you'd notice." His hand holding the soda jerked upward, his drink splashing against the lid.

Paulina burst out laughing as Danny flinched in surprise. "Did you­– did you forget you were holding that?" she asked between giggles. Recognizing Danny's nervous habit, she assumed he had been going to rub his neck. He settled for taking a long sip of his soda instead, his face as red as his shoes.

They chose a table with a view of the road, better shaded than the booths overlooking the parking lot, which were bathed in sunlight. Danny set the tray down in front of Paulina, taking his burger for himself, leaving her sliders and fries.

Neither of them said anything for a few minutes as they started eating, things quickly turning awkward again. It was as if they suddenly remembered who they were and who they were with. Paulina and Danny, popular and loser. Their kind didn't interact much unless rude words were involved. Which was, frankly, stupid. Paulina frowned at that enlightening thought.

Determined not to let the silence persist, Paulina paused after finished her first slider and asked, "What class did you skip today?"

"What makes you think I skipped?" Danny asked.

"Double detention."

"Falluca gives double detention for anything."

"Falluca had a sub today." Paulina's lips curled into a devious grin. "I guess that tells me what class you skipped."

Danny's cheeks coloured. He seriously needed to stop doing that; it was too cute when he blushed.

"I can't believe you skipped science to get in a fight," she said casually. Picking at her fries, she carefully watched Danny's reaction. His shoulders tensed and his soda cup crinkled in his hand. He wouldn't meet her gaze, instead ducking his head and self-consciously rubbing his chin against his shoulder, as if he could wipe away the bruise.

He laughed. "Pretty bad luck, right?"

"Bad luck that you've gotten in at least one fight every week since the start of the year?" Paulina's eyebrow arched.

"What makes you say that?"

"Please, I'm not blind." I also watch you as much as you watch me, she added silently. Paulina hesitated, wondering if she should push on. That same sickly fascination from before reared its head and she couldn't help but ask, "Who hurt you?"

Danny stiffened. He met Paulina's stare, eyes wide, and stuttered, "I'm not­– not one's... Look, it isn't–" He broke off and practically lunged for his soda. Staring out the window, he took a long drink, cheeks caving in, until nothing but air came up his straw. His eyes darted about, thoughts flickering across his face faster than Paulina could interpret them. He kept sucking up air until his face turned red and he let the straw go with a gasp.

Watching him crush the cup, Paulina thought he looked seconds away from bolting. She could feel his leg bouncing under the table. Taking pity on him, she reached out and grabbed his hand. Danny flinched back violently, slamming back against his seat, cradling the hand she touched against his chest. Their eyes met and, for a long, uncomfortable moment, they stared at each other in shock.

"Thanks for the burger," Danny said.

Paulina, too stunned to stop him, could only gape as Danny slid out of his seat, slapped his three dollars down on the table—which barely covered half his food—and bolted.

—

The next day at school, Paulina shoved Danny's three dollars into his locker door, tucking it behind his cheap lock. She hopped the bills didn't fall out before Danny found them. Or, worse, she hoped no one else saw the money and stole it. The easy solution would be to give him the money directly, but she thought that was a bad idea.

Paulina felt guilty. It was such a strange and foreign emotion, oozing through her. She didn't like it. Never before had she felt guilty for something, at least not this kind of guilt. Feeling bad for stealing her cousin's favourite doll when they were eight years old wasn't the same thing. She only felt bad then because she got caught.

Now, though, she wished she could pluck her words from Danny's memory. The stricken look he had given her after she touched his hand seized her heart. He looked at her like she had betrayed his trust, which was ridiculous because she was Paulina and he was Danny. There wasn't any trust between them to break. Besides, wouldn't anyone have done what Paulina did? It was only natural to ask after things you were curious about.

Except, of course, when those things pertained to someone you know being hurt by someone they knew on a daily basis. Paulina had done a lot of thinking over the last twelve hours and came to that conclusion. If Danny just liked getting in fights, surely more people would know about it? Some girls were into that kind of tough delinquent type. Contrary to Danny's sweeter nature, he did fit the mold quite well in certain ways. Messy hair, sharp eyes, always sporting a bruise and rough knuckles.

Paulina faltered, pressing her hand against Danny's locker door. Rough knuckles? They did look kind of bloody sometimes. Self-defence, maybe. Unless Paulina's original assumption was right and he did get in fights, and just didn't tell people about them.

The mental image of Danny being in some secret fight club made Paulina giggle. Danny was just a wisp. A gentle breeze could knock him over. Then again, the senior hadn't been able to make Danny budge. And when he stared Dash down, telling him off for hitting on his sister, he hadn't been fazed.

Paulina's amused smile fell into a frown. Apparently, Danny was a bigger mystery than she had first thought.

Someone tapped Paulina's shoulder. "Hey. You better not be messing with Danny's locker."

Scowling, she turned to glare at Sam Manson. "Excuse me?"

"Don't play dumb, although I know you love to. What are you doing to Danny's locker?" Sam asked.

"You should work on being less hostile, maybe more people will ask you out that way," Paulina said, enjoying the way Sam bristled. Using her long nails, Paulina pinched the edges of the bills she had stuffed into the door and pulled them out. "Here." She held them out to Sam. "I was giving Danny his money back. It fell out of his wallet at the Nasty Burger last night."

Sam didn't move.

"Oh, just take them already." Paulina grabbed Sam's hand, shoving the bills into her palm.

"You were with Danny last night?" Sam asked. Her tone, wary and belligerent all at once, gave Paulina pause.

"You didn't know," she said with dawning realization. Her smile returned, this time with a devilish twist, elated at this golden opportunity. "Danny and I went on a date yesterday."

Sam narrowed her eyes, fist curling around Danny's money. Paulina could hear her gritting her teeth. "You really expect me to believe that?"

"You think I care? Just don't forget to give him his money." Paulina left Sam with a teasing wave, savouring the enraged expression she got in response.

—

Danny knew all of Sam's tells when it came to anger. She stomped and shouted when she was frustrated. Ranted when she was fuelled by righteous indignation. Got in your face when irrationally pissed off. But when she was mad, truly, rightfully mad about something beyond her control, she turned cold.

As soon as Lancer gave the word that today's history class would be a work period, Sam rose from her desk, near the front of the room thanks to alphabetical order, and strode toward Danny and Tucker seated at the back. Her expression was subdued. Danny and Tucker shared a worried glance as she approached.

"Uh, what's up?" Danny asked when she stopped by their desks. He flinched away when Sam shoved something in his face. Staring cross-eyed at her fist, he frown at the dollar bills she held.

"Paulina said you dropped these last night," Sam said.

Danny's frown twitched. "She did?" Danny plucked the bills out of Sam's hand. "But I didn't drop them. I was paying her back."

Smoothing the bills out on the corner of his desk, he inspected them, searching for any telltale sign they were his three dollars. After staring at the money for a fully ten seconds he realized how ridiculous that was. They were just dollar bills. Unless he somehow had the serial numbers for his money memorized, there was no way he could tell them apart. A second after that, he realized how even more ridiculous it was for him to check in the first place. It didn't matter if they were the same bills, what mattered was that Paulina had evidently decided to give them back.

"Anything you want to tell us about last night?" Sam said, leaning back against Tucker's desk and crossing her arms.

Danny tucked the money into his pocket before answering. "Not really? Paulina thanked me for helping her out at lunch. Sorry again that I kind of ditched you guys."

"Nah, man, you're good. You were being all heroic." Tucker's grin carried a knowing glint that Danny didn't think belonged there, because whatever Tucker thought he knew, he was definitely wrong. "I bet you could get a date out of that."

"No," Danny said.

"Yes," Sam hissed.

"What?"

"You were on a date with Paulina last night."

"You went on a date with Paulina?" Tucker's shout drew their classmates' eyes.

Stretching over the aisle, Danny slapped his hands against Tucker's mouth. "Dude, chill! I didn't go on a date with Paulina."

"That's not what she said," Sam interrupted. She pulled Danny and Tucker apart, and glared at their nearby classmates, who were still staring. "Don't you all have better stuff to do?"

"Excellent statement, Ms. Manson," Lancer droned from the front of the room. Sitting behind his desk, he gave Sam a stern look over the top of his book. "I'm sure I told all of you to use this time and work on your social movement essays. That includes you, Ms. Manson."

"Sorry, Mr. Lancer," Sam said, barely sounding sorry at all. She pointed at Danny, silently letting him know they would continue this conversation later, and returned to her seat to do her work. Around them, their classmates did the same. At least, they pretended to. Danny could hear them whispering.

"Okay, but really. Did you go on a date with Paulina? A real one? No ghosts?" Tucker asked.

Danny dropped his forehead to his desk with a thunk, wrapping his arms over his head, and groaned. "It wasn't a date."

—

Five hours later and three classrooms over, Paulina turned to Dash and said, "Yeah, it was totally a date." The art teacher shot her a dirty look for talking, but didn't make a move to stop her. Paulina rolled her eyes and tapped her pencil against her sketchbook.

"I bet he got Manson to do some voodoo shit with you to make it happen," Dash said. He hadn't even opened his sketchbook yet. Instead of starting their newest project, he was more determined to bug Paulina about the rumors he heard over lunch hour.

Apparently, Manson couldn't keep her mouth shut and had spilled the lie Paulina fed her. The rumour didn't bother her so much. Paulina was used to people whispering things about her; that happened when you were popular. She was content to brush it all off, until Dash started getting on her case.

"No voodoo. I asked him out," she said. Her plan, once she first heard the rumour, was to ignore it until it went away. Eventually people would come to their senses and realized there was no way someone as pretty and popular as her would ever go out with Danny, no matter how cute he was. Once they did, they would move on to other more interesting bits of gossip.

But then Dash opened his stupid mouth. "A loser like Fenton?" he had said. "Knew it was a lie the moment I heard it. You're one of us. We wouldn't let you go out with him. You wouldn’t let us down like that."

Who was Dash to say who Paulina could and couldn't date? That venomous jab, and every arrogant, poison word he'd spoken since made Paulina seethe. Dash wasn't better than her. He would hit on anything that moved. He hit on her sometimes, and he definitely wasn't one of the sweet, endearing boys Paulina liked to string along.

As soon as she heard those haughty, conceited words spilling out of Dash's mouth, Paulina was determined to let Dash down so far that he'd be six feet underground. Screw Dash Baxter, and screw anyone who tried to tell Paulina what she could and couldn't do.

Dash wrinkled his nose. "Ew. Why would you go out with him again?"

"Maybe I enjoyed myself at the dance, you don't know," Paulina said flippantly. Granted, not even she knew if she enjoyed herself, but chances were Dash wouldn't know either.

"Dance? What? I'm not talking about the dance."

Paulina only gave herself a second to be confused. She blinked at Dash, furrowing her brow, then shook her head and started inspecting her fingernails, the perfect image of disinterest. "Whatever. I'm done with this conversation."

She turned back to her drawing. So far, all she had was a vague skeleton of a figure, featureless and unidentifiable, but she knew exactly who it was. It annoyed her how much Danny lingered in her thoughts when she didn't want him to.

Thinking about Danny dragged Dash's offhand comment back to the forefront of her mind. She had no evidence, but she couldn't shake the idea that what he said was related to that Kitty ghost, something Paulina had completely forgot to ask Danny about last night.

She tried to push that aside for now and focus on her art, but her hand shook too much. She flipped to a fresh page and pressed her pencil down, hard, drawing a thick dark line. Over and over she wounded the page with ugly black scars until she finally managed to draw one without trembling. Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes.

Danny owed her an explanation.

—

As soon as the bell rang, Paulina was out of her seat. She walked briskly, hurrying down the hall, stuffing her sketchbook into her backpack along the way. Danny's locker was her destination, in the hopes that she could catch him before he left school. She didn't know if he was one of those students who kept everything in his backpack or routinely stopped between classes to switch out his books. She hoped he was the former.

He wasn't there when she arrived, so she leaned against the locker next to his, arms crossed. If he didn't show up, it wouldn't matter that much. They had English first period tomorrow, and she could always talk to him then, but she preferred to have this conversation sooner rather than later.

Five minutes passed, long enough for the first round of buses to leave the school, and Danny didn't show up. Paulina felt jilted, which wasn't fair to Danny, because he didn't know she wanted to talk to him, but that didn't stop her from feeling it. Getting stood up sucked, whether it was intentional or not.

Paulina closed her eyes and grumbled under her breath. It looked like the conversation would have to wait until tomorrow. She pushed off Danny's locker, turning in the direction of her own, and opened her eyes. Danny stood right behind her. Paulina shrieked. She leapt back, heart racing, and glared at him. "Who does that?!"

"Uh, sorry." Danny scratched the back of his neck. "I was looking for you, but I thought you left already since you weren't by your locker."

Paulina huffed. "Well, it's about time you got here. Next time, don't make me wait so long?"

"Next time?" Danny shook his head. "Whatever, that's, I'll worry about that later. Listen–"

Paulina raised a hand to cut him off. "No, you listen. I don't wait around for people, okay?"

"Paulina–"

"I could have left whenever I wanted."

"If you just–"

"But I'm not letting you off that easy because–"

"We need to talk," they said at the same time. They stilled, staring at each other. Slowly, Danny's face turned red, but it wasn't the innocent blush Paulina found so endearing. His cheeks puffed and mirth danced in his eyes. He slapped a hand over his mouth, muffled giggles slipping between his fingers.

"Stop laughing," Paulina said.

Danny shook his head.

"It's not funny!" Paulina stomped her foot.

Danny lost it. Peals of laughter echoed down the slowly emptying hall. The sound was pure and unrestrained, a sweet laugh. Paulina refused to let herself be dragged into it, but she couldn't help the smile that came to her face.

"I mean, okay. It wasn't that funny. But you throwing a tantrum? That's hilarious," Danny said.

"I did not!" Paulina gasped, offended

"Sorry for laughing," Danny said, but he was still grinning. "But you're a lot nicer to be around when you're like that."

"When I'm throwing a tantrum? Which I wasn't."

"No, when you act your age," he explained.

Paulina thought that was rich coming from someone who liked to play juvenile pranks. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Danny sighed, shaking his head as if it was such a damn shame Paulina wouldn't stoop to his level of childish antics. "Paulina, we're fourteen. You shouldn't be acting like you're already in college or something. Being in high school doesn't mean being grown up. I know you probably think it's stupid, but once you get older, and you actually have to deal with... with all kinds of stuff. Bad stuff. You'll wish you hadn't grown up so fast."

Paulina didn't like the way Danny's voice grew quite. His eyes were distant, looking through her like she was nothing but a pane of glass, seeing something that was far beyond her comprehension. Her gaze fell to his chin and the ugly bruise painting his skin. Unable to help herself, she reached out, brushing her fingers along the thin scratches, wondering if they would scar.

Danny's hand shot up, catching her wrist in a crushing grip. Light returned to his eyes as he broke out of his reverie. A flicker of emotion, too fast for Paulina to decipher, flashed across his face when he saw his hand closed around her wrist. He hastily let her go, shuffling back a few steps, and averted his eyes.

"Sorry. I don't like being touched like that. Unexpectedly, I mean. Or at all, really." Danny rubbed his cheek. To Paulina, it looked like he was wiping away the feel of her hand on his skin. He continued, "We really do need to talk."

Remembering why she went looking for Danny in the first place, Paulina nodded. "Yeah, we do. You need to tell me about Kitty."

"Whoa, wait. First, you need to tell me why everyone thinks we went on a date," Danny said.

"No way, I asked first."

"Okay, fair. But I bet you want your answer a lot more than I want mine." Danny's cheerful tone had returned, an impish grin replacing his disappointed frown.

Paulina's eyebrow twitched. How could someone turn from jubilant to pensive to infuriatingly annoying in such a short span of time? It looked exhausting. Simply being around him was exhausting. Paulina's face was warm and her heart hadn't stopped pounding. She felt like she had just finished her post-cheerleading exercises.

No, that couldn't be right. Paulina felt refreshed and energized after working out. She liked that feeling. She didn't like this. Right?

"Does this mean I win?" Danny's words ragged her out of her thoughts.

"No! You don't get your answer until I get mine!" They were at a stalemate, but Paulina had complete confidence in her stubborn nature. She always got what she wanted. Danny, grin set, eyebrow arched, looked ready to fight her on this. Until he shivered. His hand flew to his mouth and his eyes widened.

"Okay, fine, but not here. I'll text you where to meet me," he said.

"Why not here?" Paulina glanced over her shoulder down the hall. It was empty now. She had probably missed her bus, but her house was only a forty minute walk away. More importantly, it meant they were alone. "You don't even have my nu–"

Paulina cut off mid-sentence when she looked forward again. Danny was already gone.

—

Danny's stitches itched. Flexing his fingers, he resisted the urge to scratch his arm. It was just a small cut on the inside of his elbow. Jazz fixed him up in six stitches. In a few days, she would take them out, leaving his arm good as new. Or almost as good. Too bad for Danny, accelerated healing did not equal regeneration and he would probably have a scar.

Damn Box Ghost. That fact hurt Danny more than the injury did, even if his stitches pulled and stung every time he bent his arm. He had no idea how the Box Ghost managed to get his grubby little hands on a box cutter, but it was a hell of a lot more effective than cardboard. Hopefully, Boxy wouldn't go bragging to every ghost in the Zone about his "victory" over Danny. Danny could heal his body a lot faster than he could heal his pride.

His phone, resting on the café table, buzzed. Checking the notification, he saw it was just a reminder about the health quiz tomorrow. Which he had completely forgotten about.

"Damn it." Danny dropped his head onto the table, making the cups and plate shake. The iced coffee he had bought for Paulina sloshed over the rim of the glass, splashing onto the table. It wasn't so iced now, more watered down. Paulina was supposed to meet him twenty minutes ago.

Lifting his head, he sipped despondently at his milkshake, gnawing on the straw. Maybe this was a bad idea. Paulina didn't need to know about Kitty, and she definitely didn't need to waste her time hanging around Danny.

He touched his cheek, thinking about how soft Paulina's fingers had been on his bruise. The unwanted touch had his skin crawling at the time. Even now, just the thought of it made him uncomfortable, but that wasn't Paulina's fault. When nearly everyone who touched you ended up hurting you, you started to hate physical contact all together. Even Sam and Tucker, who Danny trusted and loved, could set him on edge if he didn't see the contact coming.

A sharp knock on the window beside him drew his attention. His straw fell out of his mouth when he saw Paulina. She had braided her hair loosely over her shoulder and donned an unbuttoned shirt over her crop top. Instead of her regular flats, she wore scuffed sneakers. The most striking difference, however, was her lack of makeup. Even in gym class, when everyone was sweating from exertion, he had never seen Paulina in anything but pristine makeup.

She had freckles. Not the modest smattering across her nose and cheeks like Danny had, but all over. A galaxy of dots painting constellations across her face. She had a mole, too. A small brown spot on her lip. Danny hadn't realized you could have moles on your lips. If it weren't so dark, he might have thought it was another freckle.

Paulina waved. Danny waved back. His eyes trailed after her as she entered the café, the bell over the door jingling quietly. She took her seat across from him, sinking into the plush chair, the exact reason why Danny had chosen this cafe.

"Is this for me?" Paulina asked, pointing to the iced coffee.

Danny stopped staring at her long enough to nod. "And this." He pushed the small dessert plate in the middle of the table toward her. An apple fritter dusted in powdered sugar sat on it. The few crumbs scattered beside it were the only sign of the second fritter, which Danny had consumed in a nervous fit once Paulina was five minutes late.

"What for?" she asked.

"Paying you back for the burger." Danny grinned. "You can't give this back to me. And if you don't eat it, then I guess it's just wasted."

Paulina's eyes narrowed. "Not bad, Fenton. Not bad." She took a bite of the fritter and surveyed the café.

It was an out of the way place, tucked behind a bookshop, and had to be entered around the back. Danny first found the place last month when he saved the owners, a retired couple, from one of Technus' schemes. It was small, cozy, had big armchairs and soft lighting, and served the best pastries in Amity Park.

"It took my dad a while to find this place, even with the address," Paulina said.

"Oh, your dad?" Danny remembered her dad. Big, burly, intimidating. He wasn't as tall as Danny's dad but, with arms as thick as his, was nothing to scoff at. Danny glanced around, half-expecting the man to leap out from one of the tables.

"He went to the bookstore," Paulina said.

"Good to know. Hey, I hope you don't mind me asking, but why the change in appearance?" He gestured vaguely toward his face.

Paulina finished her fritter, dusting the sugar off her fingers, and played with her braid. "You think I wear makeup all the time?"

"No, but I've just never seen you without it."

"So what?"

"So, you, uh, I've just never seen you without any." Danny stared down at his milkshake, feeling his cheeks heat up. "I like your freckles."

Paulina didn't answer. Worried he'd made her mad, he glanced up. Danny's eyes widened when he found her blushing. Paulina got a lot of compliments from a lot of boys and she always reacted with a coy smile, unless the guy was bothering her. He'd never seen her blush.

"Just tell me about Kitty," she said, clutching her iced coffee.

Danny decided to just get it over with. "She overshadowed you during spring break, but I didn't know she was overshadowing you and I thought she was just you, and so did everyone else, and we kind of dated for a few weeks, until I realized you weren't yourself and I stopped Kitty and you didn't remember anything the next day, but you seemed fine and you went on without saying anything, so I didn't mention it."

He sucked in a deep, wheezing breath and downed the rest of his milkshake in one gulp, licking whipped cream off his upper lip after he set the glass down.

Paulina stared at him, frozen.

"Ah, wait, did I say I stopped her? I meant Danny Phantom did. Yeah. The ghost boy. Not me," Danny said.

Paulina still didn't respond. She looked... Danny didn't know how she looked. Confused? Upset? Mad? She didn't say anything, didn't even blink. The seconds dragged on and Danny's worry grew.

"Paulina?" She didn't answer. Danny grabbed his hair. "I can't believe I broke Paulina Sanchez."

Paulina started. "You didn't break me!" She reached out, poised to slap his hands, but stopped at the last second. Her hand hovered for a moment, then went back to holding her drink. "We dated—for a couple weeks—and I have no memory of it."

"It was almost three weeks, actually," Danny said.

"That's not helping!"

"Right! Sorry!"

Paulina hunched over, curling an arm over her head, her eyes wide. Her parted lips moved slightly. Danny wondered if she was mouthing along with the thoughts running through her head. If so, it was oddly cute. If not... still cute.

"I think," she said after a long silence. "I think I sort of remember. Those weeks didn't disappear, but I can barely remember anything with you from them."

"Ghosts can do that when they overshadow you for a long time. Usually, the memories will just be gone, or sort of hazy. But if they stay in one person long enough, they can manipulate what you remember," Danny explained. Kitty had assured him Paulina would only lose her memories of Danny. It was oddly considerate of her, but he chose not to question it.

"You didn't tell me."

Deciding honesty was best, Danny nodded. "No, I didn't."

"What is wrong with you!" Paulina slammed her hands on the table, rattling the dishes.

Danny recoiled. "I didn't think–"

"No, you didn't! A ghost... a ghost possessed me. For three weeks. You were the only one who knew, and you didn't tell me?" Tears glistened in Paulina's eyes. Her lips curled. The soft, sweet blush from before was long gone, replaced by a face red with anger.

"They call it overshadowing," Danny corrected. He didn't know what else to say.

"I don't care what it's called! She violated me, and you didn't think I had a right to know? She could have done anything to me!" Paulina hugged herself, going pale. Shaking her head, she stood up. "I can't be around you right now."

Danny reached out, but there was nothing he could do to stop her as she stormed out of the café. He sank low in his seat, but it was nowhere near as low as he felt.

"You really screwed up, Fenton," Danny whispered.

—

Paulina avoided Danny for the rest of the week. The rumour about her and Danny dating died out without too much fuss. Dash texted Paulina a smug grin and a self-satisfied "Knew you wouldn't do it!" and everything went back to the way it was supposed to be. She hung out with her friends, went to cheerleading practice, did her homework. On the weekend, she and Star went to an old film screening at the theatre.

This was her life, as it had always been, back to normal. So why did it feel like she was missing something?

Paulina went for a walk in the park, just before sunset. Tomorrow was Monday. It had been a lot easier to ignore Danny over the weekend, when they weren't forced into the same room for classes. But it still felt hard.

She picked her way across the wet grass, drops of water clinging to her sneakers. It had stopped raining over an our ago, but the grey sky and chill air remained. Finding a bench by the duck pond, she sat down, crossing her legs on the damp wood. Her dad didn't like her being out alone so close to dark, but she needed to think somewhere no one would disturb her.

Paulina had never had a crush before. In middle school, whenever any of the other girls asked if she had one, she always pointed to whichever boy showed the least interest in her, even though she felt nothing special around them. But Danny made her feel giddy. He pulled out a childish side of her that she hadn’t realized she missed. She wanted to spend time with him, play more immature  games with him, hold his hand. If that wasn't a crush, she didn't know what was.

But he had to go and ruin it by keeping something so personal from her.

"Boys are stupid," Paulina declared to the open air.

A sudden chill came over her and an echoing voice spoke. "Do dead boys count? Because I like to think I'm pretty smart."

Paulina managed not to shout in surprise, but she did flinch as Danny Phantom appeared in front of her.

"Sorry, didn't mean to startle you," he said. He floated on his stomach, chin propped on his hand, hovering a respectful distance away. "I saw you sitting alone and thought I'd let you know it's almost night. Ghosts get more active right around now. It'd be safer for you to head home."

Paulina pursed her lips. Danny had said Phantom helped free her from Kitty's clutches. "Why didn't you tell me I had been possessed?"

"It's called overshadowing, actually," Phantom said.

"Ugh, you Dannys are all alike." Standing up, she marched away.

Phantom rushed to catch up with her, flying around to block her path. "Hey, no, wait. I'm sorry. Let me fly you home."

Paulina lifted her chin and looked away. "No, thank you." She walked around him and started for the park entrance.

"Okay, that's fair. But at least let me fly with you? It really is dangerous."

Paulina stopped. Glancing back at Phantom, she gave him a critical look. Something about the way he said that was familiar, but she couldn't figure out what.

"Please?" he said.

"Fine." She kept walking, watching Phantom out of the corner of her eye. He floated a couple feet away, knees bent as if he was kneeling, and easily keeping pace. It was bizarre to watch, like a poorly edited video where a frozen character got dragged across the screen in lieu of actual movement.

"I'm sorry," Phantom said.

Paulina's eyes jumped forward, her shoulders stiffening as she tried to act casual. "For what?"

"The Kitty thing. Fenton's sorry, too. He talked to me about it."

"Did he now?"

"Yeah. It was... it was my idea not to tell you. Getting overshadowed isn't fun. And you were right, it is a violation. It's taking over someone's body. Taking control of them. It's not right. I only do it if I absolutely have to."

"But you still do it."

"Yeah..." Phantom at least had the mind to look ashamed of that fact. When they reached the street, he drifted closer. Paulina considered stepping away, putting that distance between them again, but he looked sincere, and she wanted to hear what he had to say. She nodded, motioning for him to continue.

"I just thought you would be happier not knowing. Kitty didn't do anything bad with you. Actually, she kind of had your personality down. No one else noticed there was something wrong."

That didn't make Paulina feel better.

"It was a dumb decision, and both Fenton and I were idiots for going along with it." Phantom's grin turned wry. "I guess you were right. Boys are stupid."

Paulina huffed, standing a little straighter. "Of course I was."

"Fenton wants to talk to you."

"Then he can tell me that himself." Paulina paused. "Wait." Reaching out, she touched Phantom's shoulder to stop him.

Phantom swerved away from her hand, turning upside-down to get out of reach. His eyes widened, a green blush rising in his cheeks. "Um. Instincts. From fighting and stuff. Sorry."

"It's fine," she said, taking her hand back. "Be honest with me. Did Danny put you up to this?"

"Uh..." Phantom laughed weakly. "Which one's better?"

Paulina didn't bother answering that question.

"He asked me to talk to you, yeah." Phantom rubbed the back of his neck. "He wanted to give you your space, and he thought you might appreciate me talking to you more. You know, because of your crush."

"What makes you think I have a crush on you?"

Phantom drifted in front of her, legs and arms crossed, hair hanging down. "You don't?"

Paulina could see why Phantom, or anyone, would think that. She had never bothered hiding her infatuation before. But, long ago, she realized that what she felt was admiration, not love.

"You're cute, for a dead boy," she said.

"I'm gonna be honest; I can't decide if I should be offended or not," Phantom said. His grin was strikingly familiar.

Paulina stared at him, contemplative, and smirked when Phantom rubbed the back of his neck. "It it's any consolation, I just realized you remind me a lot of the boy I like."

Phantom finally flipped back around, feet touching the ground, and leaned forward. "Really?"

"Yeah. Who knows, if you were still alive, you might have had a chance."

Phantom laughed. The echo in his voice made it deeper than Danny's, but it had the same charm. It was the kind of laugh that warmed the air and begged anyone within earshot to join in. Paulina indulged herself with a few soft giggles.

"Thanks for breaking my heart," Phantom said.

"Any time."

—

Monday morning, Danny arrived at school twenty minutes earlier than usual, which meant there were only ten minutes before the bell. He planted himself by the door and waited there, lurking in the shadow of the entryway.

"You look like a creep," Tucker said. He had his nose to his phone and hadn't looked up the whole time Danny had been there.

"Shut up, you don't know that," Danny said.

"No." Sam, seated on the cement wall, leaned forward and flicked Danny's bangs. "But I do. Stop being so edgy."

"I'm not being edgy! I'm waiting for a girl!"

"Okay, Mr. Brooding."

"I'm not," Danny said, brooding.

Paulina hadn't arrived at school yet. As soon as Danny got there, he flew all throughout the halls, invisible, searching for her. Anxious he might miss her, he refused to move from his spot by the door until either the bell rang, or Paulina showed up, whichever came first. He really hoped Paulina came first. If the bell rang before she arrived, if he missed his chance to talk to her now, all his confidence would wither away.

"You're being ridiculous," Sam said.

"You don't know what I'm thinking," Danny said.

"Your face is so easy to read."

"Why do you care, anyway?" Danny spun around and glared at her. "You hate Paulina, right? You looked pretty damn mad at me when you only thought we went out."

"Danny–"

"I don't want to hear it, Sam. Just go inside. I can wait on my own." Turning his back on her, he crossed his arms and went back to watching the sidewalk.

Sam clenched her jaw. "Fine," she ground out, hopping off the wall. Shoving past Danny, she headed inside.

"Dude. That was kind of harsh," Tucker said.

Danny pressed his lips together, refusing to budge. Sam didn't have any business getting annoyed at him for liking a Paulina. He could like whoever he wanted. If Sam didn't agree, that was her problem.

"Good luck, man. I hope it goes well." Tucker clapped Danny on the shoulder, exaggerating the gesture so there was lots of warning before he made contact.

"Thanks," Danny muttered. Once Tucker disappeared through the doors, Danny moved to the top step, sitting down with his arms draped over his knees. None of his peers spared him a single glance as they headed inside. For once, it was oddly calming, settling his nerves. No one would be around to see him make a fool of himself in front of the prettiest girl in school. Again.

Hopefully, this time, his pants will at least stay on.

Two minutes before the bell, Paulina finally appeared. A navy car pulled up to the curb outside the school, Paulina climbing out of the passenger door with her pink backpack over her shoulders. Danny stood and waved as the car pulled away, catching her eye. Paulina's steps faltered, and she didn't smile or wave back, but she kept walking forward, only stopping once she was on the step below him.

"I'm sorry," Danny said.

"I know." Paulina shuffled her feet, grip tightening around the straps of her backpack. "Phantom talked to me."

Danny bit his lip, trying to fight back the heat rising in his cheeks as he remembered yesterday's conversation. Learning that Paulina liked him was the last thing he expected to get out of that talk. At least he believed she liked him. Maybe he misunderstood. In fact, he probably did. Why would Paulina like him of all people? Fenton had nothing on Phantom. That was his main goal in human form, to differentiate himself from his ghost half as much as possible.

Oh, god, this was a horrible idea. He should just go inside and forget about his crush.

"The bell is gonna go in, like, less than a minute. Is there a reason you're making me stand out here?" Paulina asked. Thankfully, she sounded more amused than annoyed, but she had a point. Danny didn’t want to be late on the first day he got to school on time in months.

"Will you go out with me?" he asked. "Or at least on a date. I mean, everybody already thought we dated, so I might as well get one date out of it."

A second later, he realized how bad that sounded and rushed to correct himself. "I mean! That's not why I want to go out with you! I was trying to be funny. Sorry, that was stupid. I really like you, Paulina. You're pretty, and you're a lot smarter than people think, and I really like being around you."

He couldn't bear to look up, choosing instead to stare down at his sneakers while wringing his hands. Paulina's smaller, smoother hand edged into his vision. She didn't touch him—something he was thankful for—but flicked her finger up, silently asking him to raise his head. He did.

Paulina smiled, bittersweet, and said, "No."

Danny's heart cracked.

"I like you, Danny, but I don't really know you. It's not bad, it just means I'm not ready to date you right now," Paulina said.

"That hasn't stopped you from going out with guys before." Danny regretted the words as soon as they were out of his mouth.

Paulina's eyes widened, her lips falling open. She ground her teeth, face screwing up as she leaned away from him. For a moment, he thought she was going to hit him, but she did something much worse than that. Paulina burst into tears.

"I take it back. I hate you, Danny!" she shouted, shoving him aside. Danny stumbled into the concrete rail as she stormed past him. It was just like last time, but so much worse. Why did he keep screwing things up?

Danny shook his head, pushing off the wall. This time, he wouldn’t just let her go.

"Paulina, wait!" Lurching forward, he grabbed her wrist just as she opened the door, pulling her back before she could go through. The sharp call of the warning bell rang out, but it was soon silenced as the door swung shut, leaving Danny and Paulina in silence.

"I'm sorry. That was stupid. I don't know why I said it," Danny said. He squeezed her hand. "Please don't go."

Paulina's gaze dipped to their clasped hands. Could she see the growing panic in Danny's eyes? Already, a crawling sensation was spreading up his hand. He wanted to let go. He needed to let go. But he refused to do it until he knew Paulina would hear him out.

"Why should I listen to you?" she asked.

"Because I'm an idiot. I really don't know why I said that. Well, maybe I do." Danny let her hand go. When she didn't immediately leave, he kept going. " It just... it took a lot of guts for me to ask you out, and of course that doesn’t mean you have to say yes. But you said it yourself; you like me too. Isn't the whole point of dating to get to know the person?"

"How many dates do you think I've been on?"

"Uh..." Thrown by the questioned, Danny floundered, trying to come up with a number. "At least ten."

Paulina's eyes narrowed. "Let me guess, one for homecoming, the others for when I was possessed? Or overshadowed, whatever it's called."

"Yeah."

"Well, that's nine more dates then I ever remember being on." Paulina crossed her arms, glaring down at Danny. Now that they were on even footing, she was taller than him by an inch. "It looks like you don't know me that well either. You judged me because of how much I'm flirted with. I don't want to date someone who would do something like that without hearing my side of things first. No matter how much I like them."

Ashamed, Danny lowered his head. Paulina was right. He took what he saw and made a snap judgement about her without even asking her about it. He thought he was better than that, better than those guys who trailed after her. But he wasn't. He was just bad in a different way.

"You're right," he said quietly, hugging himself. "I'm sorry. That wasn't fair. Do you at least... could we hang out as friends, then?"

Finally, she graced him with a genuine smile.

—

Danny slunk into history class three minutes after the bell, shooting Lancer a weak grin. All he got was a head shake and a resigned smile in return, which meant Lancer was in a good mood that day. Taking his seat, Danny stuffed his backpack under his seat and settled in as Lancer started talking about the essays they drafted last week.

"So," Tucker whispered. "How'd it go?"

Danny sank down in his seat, leaning toward Tucker without looking too obvious, and whispered back, "It went okay, I think. I kind of made her cry, but then I made it better?"

"Dude. That's not how to ask out a girl."

"Shut up, I know! She didn’t say yes, anyway."

"Oh. Bummer."

Lancer started down the aisles, handing everyone's essay drafts back, which they had submitted for editing. Danny and Tucker fell silent as he passed by. Lancer handed Danny his essay while smiling approvingly. Danny's eyes widened. He glanced down at his paper, excitement filling him, and had to hold back a cry of victory when he saw his tentative grade. A solid B! If he played this right, he could get his first A in months. Today may have had a rocky start, but it was turning out pretty good.

Lancer finished handing out the essays and went to stand at the front of the classroom. He clapped his hands together. "Please get together into groups for peer editing. Your final drafts are due in three days, so use your time wisely."

Desks screeched as everyone started moving, shoving their seats together to sit by their friends. Tucker, without getting out of his desk, shuffled toward Danny, turning so they were perpendicular. Sam, coming up from the front of the classroom, took the newly vacated desk in front of Danny and turned it around to face his. Slapping her essay down on the table, she dropped into the seat, crossing her arms and legs, and glared at Danny. He glared right back.

"We're gonna hang out as friends first," Danny said to Tucker.

Tucker grinned. "Less of a bummer."

"Not worried I'll get mad if you talk about her in front of me?" Sam asked, her voice cold.

"You can do whatever you want, Sam," Danny said.

Sam's eyes hardened. "Stop being so difficult, Danny! I'm just trying to keep you from getting hurt. You've seen how Paulina is. She likes to toy with people, then toss them away. I told you what she said at homecoming. She was just using you to get back at me."

"Oh, come on, grow up. This isn’t about you. This has nothing to do with you. I like her, she likes me. Just let me be happy, will you?" Danny raised his hand, rising out of his seat. "Mr. Lancer, I'm going to the bathroom."

Without waiting for an answer, he left the room. Ducking into the closest bathroom, he transformed and shot out of the school. There had to be a ghost wreaking havoc somewhere for him to vent his frustration on. Maybe, if he was lucky, he could get the Box Ghost back for injuring him last week. Just as Danny thought, the cut ended up scarring. Thankfully, the one on his face hadn't, healing with barely a trace a few days after he got it.

Danny circled the school thinking. Immediately rushing out of the room had been a little hasty, but he wanted one moment where Sam didn't rag on him for liking Paulina. If Sam was going to act like that any time he mentioned Paulina, he couldn't be around her right now.

The ridiculousness of the situation made him laugh bitterly. He never thought he would fight with Sam about a girl.

—

Sam and Tucker sat in strained silence after Danny left. Tucker, rightfully assuming Danny wouldn't come back any time soon, grabbed Danny's essay and backpack, pulling them over to his desk.

"So..." Tucker said.

Sam snatched up her own essay, busying herself by flipping through it. "I don't want to hear it."

"Are you jealous?"

"Did you not hear anything I said?" Sam asked without looking up.

Tucker rested his chin on his hand, staring at Sam. All three of them had known each other for a long time, although Tucker and Danny had been friends longer. Over the years, they'd had their spats, but that was usually just Tucker and Sam, who had a lot of conflicting opinions. Even then, they limited themselves to heated but still friendly debates. They had never really been mad at each other.

Tucker didn't think their friendship would end over something like this, but he also didn't like that they were fighting. He wanted to supported Danny, and he wanted to understand Sam, too.

"Yeah, I heard you," Tucker nodded, "and I don't actually think you're jealous."

Sam finally put her essay down. "Then why even ask?"

"To see your reaction." Tucker met Sam's glare with a bright smile. "I think whatever your problem is with Paulina, it's got nothing to do with Danny. And it's got nothing to do with principles. You're not the kind of person who would hate other girls just because they like to feel pretty. Especially not with how much you care about your own appearance."

Sam huffed but didn't argue.

"I also think that you and Paulina should work things out. Not for Danny, but for yourself."

Sam pressed her lips together in a firm line, eying Tucker blankly. After a brief pause, she shook her head and sighed. "It truly is a sad day when you're the most mature out of the three of us."

"Wow, rude."

"I'm not making any promises. I've got a right to be mad at Paulina for what she's done. But... I'll think about it. For me, not anybody else."

"That's all I ask. Now give me your essay, we're supposed to be doing group work. Danny can suffer for skipping class when he didn't need to. I'll look at his tonight."

Sam rolled her eyes. Passing her essay over, she grabbed Tucker's, then snatched Danny's off Tucker's desk. "Please. If you touch his essay, I bet his grade will go down."

"I take back all of the advice I just gave you. You don't deserve it. Give it back," Tucker said, holding his hand out and beckoning.

"Too late, I've been thoroughly advised."

"Rude."

—

Paulina prided herself in have a clean record. She got good grades, participated in school activities, and, for the most part, respected the teachers that actually deserved it. But she still ended up in detention with Wednesday afternoon. Paulina found herself alone with Danny in the library after school. Technically, there was a teacher watching over them, but Tetslaff had disappeared into the librarian's office some time ago and hadn't re-emerged. She was certainly the best teacher to get for detention.

Paulina used the chair beside her as a footrest and had her sketchbook balanced on her knees while she worked on her art project. Danny, sitting across from her, hunched over an essay. He sported a black eye and a cut lip, his hair more mussed than usual. The hoodie he wore was too long for him, but still slim.

"Is that your sister's sweater?" Paulina asked. The burgundy fabric paired with teal hoodie strings looked like something Jazz would wear.

Danny's cheeks coloured and he looked up. "Yeah. I borrowed it from her locker this morning."

Paulina giggled.

"Hey, does this count as us hanging out?" he asked, gesturing to the library at large. "I mean, it's detention, but..."

"I don't see why not."

"Cool." Danny lowered his voice, leaned forward, and gruffly asked. "What are you in for?"

"Indecent exposure. My shoulders are criminally offensive." Paulina tugged on the collar of her gym shirt, showing the spaghetti straps of her tank top underneath. "Did you get caught fighting behind the school or something?"

Danny laughed, throwing his head back. "Haven't you heard? I'm a truant, a nonattender. Ishiyama actually used those words."

"Everybody already knows that."

"First of all, ouch. Second of all, yeah. But I skipped English on Monday and I was late for school yesterday and today. Ishiyama's finally threatening me with suspension," Danny said. Essay forgotten, he folded his arms on the table and rested his cheek on the crook of his elbow. "Jazz convinced her not to go through with it, though. Something about how making me miss school won't fix my problem with missing school."

Paulina snorted. Danny burst out laughing, making her squawk with embarrassment. She clapped a hand over her mouth. "You didn't hear that!"

Danny smirked at her. "Pretty sure I did."

"No you didn't!"

"Nah, I think I did. Don't worry, it's cute."

"I swear, if you tell anyone that I snort laughed, I am going to end you, Fenton."

"You wouldn't dare. You like me too much."

"No talking!" Tetslaff's shout cut off their banter. She leaned out of the librarian's office, shooting them a stern glare, and made a zipping motion over her lips. She pointed at her eyes, pointed at them, then disappeared back through the door.

Paulina and Danny glanced at each other. The moment their eyes met, they broke down into muffled laughter, pressing their faces into their arms to try and stay quiet.

"What do you think she's doing in there?" Danny whispered.

"Push-ups. Or squats," Paulina said. "I've seen her doing them in her own office during gym class."

"I think she's got thicker arms than my dad. I'm honestly impressed. Good for her."

The sincerity in Danny's tone made Pauline smile. She always admired strong women. Even if she didn't like Tetslaff sometimes, it was hard not to be impressed by her physique. Buff and burly wasn't Paulina's thing, but anyone who could pull it off had her respect.

They spend the next few minutes working diligently on their homework. Paulina was nearly done with her sketch. If she finished today, she could submit it to her teacher for critique tomorrow. Hopefully getting feedback wouldn't take too long. She wanted to star painting it right away, already deciding to use watercolours.

Tapping her chin with her pencil, she looked away from her sketchbook and watched Danny. His black eye looked like it hurt. Red around his eye, fading to a dark, almost black purple. It was swollen, but not shut. Just enough that it looked like he was squinting.

Paulina hummed. She had a hard time picturing Danny completely free of injuries. Going back to her sketch, she made a slight adjustment.

"What are you drawing?" Danny asked. He pulled himself halfway onto the table, trying to see the sketchbook.

"Hey, no peeking before it's done!" Paulina said, holding the book to her chest.

"So you were gonna show me?"

Paulina bit her lip. "Maybe."

"Can I see it now?"

She glanced down at her sketch, then up at Danny, and down again. After a few seconds of internal debating—which was more for show than anything—she dropped her sketchbook on the table and pushed it across. Danny grabbed it and eagerly took in the drawing. Paulina wanted to hide her face as his eyes widened and his mouth fell open.

The project was to draw the future. Paulina knew Dash was going for some sci-fi world with tall, gleaming buildings and flying cars. Star chose an apocalyptic wasteland. Kwan, ever the optimist, wanted to draw a full, green world. They were great ideas, but the project had no set restrictions, so Paulina went a different route.

She drew Danny. At least, how she pictured Danny after high school, after college, when he was grown up. In space, wearing a sleek astronaut suit. She gave him a stronger chin and jawline, to age him, but kept the wondrous grin that radiated innocent delight.

Danny stared at the sketch for a long time, his smile stretching into the same grin, before passing it back. "It's really good."

Paulina, too embarrassed, to speak, nodded in thanks. She hoped he didn't notice the black eye she had added to the drawing moments prior. Eager to move the conversation along, she asked, "What are you working on?"

"History essay. It's due tomorrow, but Lancer let us hand in drafts first, so I'm just editing it now." Danny lifted his essay, showing off the red pen marks all over the page.

"Huh. He's been doing that a lot more," Paulina said. She couldn't pinpoint when it started, but Lancer let students submit drafts in almost all his courses now.

"Yeah. Would have been nice if he did that from the start, but I got lucky. I was really close to failing history before he started doing this. It's pretty great."

"You know what really helps you pass your classes? Stop skipping them and actually do your homework," Paulina deadpanned. She could never hand in an unfinished assignment, much less skip class. How Danny did it without breaking down in a nervous fit, she had no idea.

Danny offered her a strained smile. "Ha, if only." He held her gaze for a few seconds before letting his eyes fall. Ducking his head, he folded his hands over his face. He probably meant to appear occupied with his essay, but his shaky breaths ruined the façade.

Paulina frowned. Stretching across the table, she tapped his hand, a light touch to grab his attention. Danny raised his head slightly and peered at her from behind his intertwined fingers. It was hard to meet his eyes. Something pitiful lurked in his gaze, a shadow of resignation dragging him down. It startled Paulina with its frailty.

A week ago, she never would have imagined finding such a self-deprecating glint in Danny's eyes. Despite how much she watched him, she really didn't know a lot about him, not until he sent that senior, Keith, running. But even after that, she couldn't picture it. She had seen Danny angry, embarrassed, happy, nervous. Not once had it crossed her mind that Danny could be brought so low by such powerful self-doubt.

Even now, seeing it for herself, it felt so off. Like it didn't belong in his eyes, because it didn't. Danny was supposed to be the nervous, smiling boy kicking rocks down the sidewalk.

"Danny... why do you skip school so much?" she asked.

He tensed, nails digging into the back of his hands, and glanced away.

"Is it related to you getting hurt all the time?" Paulina wanted to reach out and touch his cheek, just below the bruise, but held herself back. She didn't want to make Danny uncomfortable.

"Maybe," he whispered. Leaning back, he pulled the hood of Jazz's sweater up, tugging on the strings. As the they tightened, the hood's opening cinched together, squishing Danny's hair flat. "It's not that I don't want to tell you," he continued. "It's just... personal. And I can guarantee it's not anything you think it is."

"Can you?"

"Pinky swear." Danny stretched out, extending his pinky toward her.

Paulina wasn't satisfied, but she'd take. "Pinky swear." Meeting Danny in the middle of the table, she hooked her pinky around his and they shook on it.

—

You | yesterday 4:04 pm hey

Delete This Number | yesterday 6:22 pm ... you still have my number?

You | yesterday 6:22 pm i've been meaning to delete it it took you two hours to say that

Delete This Number | yesterday 6:26 pm Sure. You've been meaning to for almost two years. And some of us aren't attached to our phones.

You | yesterday 6:27 pm that's hilarious coming from you

Delete This Number | yesterday 6:31 pm It's Thursday. Cheerleading practice, duh.

You | yesterday 6:31 pm because i'm gonna remember that

Delete This Number | yesterday 6:31 pm Whatever. What do you want?

You | yesterday 6:57 pm we need to talk

Delete This Number | yesterday 6:58 pm Now who's taking forever?

You | yesterday 6:58 pm shut up i've got better stuff to do but constantly being mad at you is exhausting

Delete This Number | yesterday 6:58 pm Oh, no. Poor you.

You | yesterday 6:59 pm you know what this was a stupid idea whatever i don't care

Delete This Number | yesterday 7:09 pm I'll meet you before school tomorrow.

Sam scowled at her messages, wondering if this really was a good idea. She had spent the rest of Wednesday and most of Thursday considering Tucker's words. In all that time, she couldn't think of a solid argument against his advice. She hated it. But she wasn't stubborn enough to ignore it regardless, so as soon as she got home on Thursday, she gave in and messaged Paulina.

Sam wanted to work it out through text, so they wouldn't have to talk in person. Of course Paulina, being Paulina, had to make it an awkward, horrible, definitely-going-to-go-wrong face-to-face conversation.

"'Before school.' When before school? You couldn't say a damn time?" Sam muttered. She wasn't stupid enough to think the conversation would be short and sweet, but pacing in front of the school a full hour before the first bell made her feel like an idiot. It wouldn't surprise her if Paulina didn't even show. She should have just stayed home.

"This is stupid," she said.

"And yet you're still here."

Sam—who was not startled, merely mildly surprised—whirled around, instinctively raising her arms in defence.

Paulina gave Sam's bony fists an unimpressed stare. "Oh, please."

"I could take you."

"You're not worth the time." Paulina made a show of checking her nails, humming in disinterest. "If all you wanted was to threaten me, then I'll be going now." She turned toward the school, walking up the sidewalk.

Sam squeezed her eyes shut, clenching her fists. Before she could lose her nerve, she shouted, "Why did you stand me up?"

The sound of Paulina's footsteps stopped. Opening one eye to peek out, Sam saw Paulina frozen a few steps away from her. She was curled inward, fingers clenched around the fabric of her skirt. She took a deep breath, shoulders rising. As she let it out, she straightened up, raising her head and pushing her shoulders back, hands relaxing at her sides. By the time Paulina turned around to face Sam, she was perfectly composed.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Paulina said.

Sam gritted her teeth. Taking a step forward, she jabbed at Paulina. "You. Stood. Me. Up. In middle school."

"Sorry, not ringing any bells," Paulina said flippantly.

"The summer Danny and Tucker went to that stupid boys camp." Sam made a dismissive gesture.

"Nope."

"Damn it, Paulina! I'm trying to have a real conversation with you here! I'm tired. I'm tired of hating you. And I am so, so tired of being heartbroken when I don't even like you anymore!" Sam scrubbed her eyes. Stupid body crying without her permission. The last thing she wanted to do in front of Paulina now was cry. "I don't even know why I'm trying."

"Why are you always like this?" Paulina shouted. Her voice was thick and watery. Looking up, Sam saw she was crying, too. Fat tears rolled down her cheeks, smudging her makeup. "Why couldn't you just pretend it never happened?"

"Because I liked you!"

Paulina marched forward and grabbed Sam's wrist. "You want me to say it? Fine! I tricked you. I mislead you. I got pretty and loved and suddenly I was obligated to love everybody back. But you were supposed to be different!"

Sam ripped her hand out of Paulina's grip. "I was different!"

"Why? Because you were a girl? Newsflash, you weren't the only girl who liked me."

"Oh, poor miss popular. Thirteen years old and already boys and girls were throwing themselves at your feet. What a sad, woeful existence for you, huh?"

Paulina screamed wordlessly. Her hands shook. She turned, stomping up the path, then pivoted and came right back. "You know that's not what it was like. I told you. I told you so much."

"You told me you liked me!"

"And I lied!" Paulina bellowed.

They stood almost nose to nose, shoulders heaving, red-faced as they panted. Sam was suddenly very annoyed that Paulina had screamed first. Right now, screaming was all she wanted to do, but doing it second felt cheap.

"You, Paulina Sanchez, are a bitch," Sam spat.

"And you're pathetic."

Sam's gaze jumped all over Paulina's face, taking in her streaked mascara, her blush that was thoroughly ruined, her smudged eyeshadow. Sam probably didn't look much different, in that moment.

"I liked you. I really liked you. And you made me think you liked me, too." Sam's voice fell, going quiet at the end. She couldn't stand seeing Paulina's face. Paulina wasn't allowed to look heartbroken, not after what she did.

"That whole summer, you made me feel special." Sam struggled to keep her voice steady. "And it's so stupid, right? We were thirteen. We're barely older than that now. All of this will probably seem so stupid when we're older. Hell, it already does, considering the kind of stuff I've been through. But that doesn't stop it from hurting."

"You never told Danny or Tucker." The fight had gone out of Paulina's voice.

"No, I didn't. I didn't want to be another Sanchez reject." Sam spat the words bitterly. "But it didn't matter if they knew or not. You and I, we knew." She hugged herself. Being exposed like this was her worst nightmare. She wanted to go back to being the strong, loud, and proud Manson girl she always was. Not this heartbroken shell of someone she used to be. "Do you remember what we were supposed to do?"

Paulina worried her lip and said nothing.

"The beach. I liked it best at night, when the sand was cold and the ocean was back, and you told me you wanted to see it. I had to beg my mom to let me go out on my own so late. I waited for you for three hours." It had been the coldest, loneliest three hours in Sam's life at that point. By now, that top spot belonged to the hours waiting for Danny as he fought Pariah Dark. It made being stood up seem so trivial, but that didn't make it hurt any less.

Sam squeezed her phone. "Do you remember what your text said?"

Paulina's gaze dropped to the sidewalk. That was all the answer Sam needed.

"You said you were tired." Sam laughed. It sounded bitter and fragile, even to her ears. "You said you were tired of me following you around everywhere, and you said you didn't have time for a friend like me."

"Oh."

"Which brings me back to my original question. Why did you do it?"

Shame poured from Paulina, but it didn't fill Sam with the righteous vindication she always thought it would. It just made her sad. They could have been friends. If Paulina had just been honest with her from the start, Sam would have understood. Instead, they wasted two years hating each other, leaving their old wounds to fester and spoil, letting foolish mistakes ruin what could have been a great bond.

"I don't know," Paulina said.

"That's not a real answer."

"Like hell it isn't! I don't know, okay? I don't know why I did it. I wasn't sure how I felt about boys, I didn't even know I was allowed to like girls, and it was just too much. You were too much." Paulina toyed with her fingers, intertwining them and twisting them, an unusual display of nerves. "You were so certain about yourself, and I wasn't certain about anything. I just couldn't handle it, and the only solution I saw was to pretend it all never happened and move on."

"I want to call you a coward," Sam said. Paulina didn't protest, which was telling enough. It would be easy. Four simple words: you are a coward. But she couldn't do it. "You were a kid. And I was a kid. And we're still kids. I can't... I can't be mad at you for that. It still hurts, but I get it."

"You sound a lot like Danny, you know."

"Really?" Sam tipped her chin up. "How so?"

"He said something like that. Well, not really. But he said I was acting too grown up when I shouldn't be." Paulina wiped her face with the heel of her palm. It did nothing to improve her appearance, only smudging her makeup more.

"It's so annoying when he's right, isn't it?" Sam smiled.

Paulina smiled back. She laughed and nodded, the last few tears falling from her eyes. Hearing her laugh, Sam felt a weight lift off her. A great aching burden she had been carrying for two years suddenly disappeared, beaten back by that simple sound. She didn't like Paulina anymore, not like that, but Sam had always missed her.

She checked the time on her phone. "The first bus should get here in a couple minutes. Come on, you're a mess, and I've got some face wipes in my locker."

"Not like you look any better," Paulina pointed out.

"Maybe not. But I feel better," Sam said.

"Yeah. So do I."

They walked up the sidewalk, a yawning space between them, but it would close in time. Sam could feel it.

—

Paulina had only been to the Manson household a handful of times during the summer she and Sam almost dated. It was just as grand as she remembered. The Mansons were rich and extravagant and they liked to show it. Sam's understated style made it so easy to forget she came from money. Lots and lots of money.

"And she has a bowling alley!" Tucker said. For the past ten minutes, he had been regaling Paulina with the wonders of the house.

They sat in the plush armchairs of the Manson's basement theatre, the blank TV ahead of them. Sam and Danny were upstairs waiting for the pizza to arrive, leaving them alone. Paulina wasn't sure how she felt about that. Out of the trio of close-knit friends, Tucker was the only one she had never spent any one-on-one time with. He reminded her of Dash in too many ways, hitting on any girl within his sight.

Really, it was only the one similarity, but for Paulina, it was bad enough that she didn't like Tucker all that much. At least he had the brains to stop pursuing a girl the moment she said no. And, it seemed, he no longer had any interest in her.

"I wouldn't be surprised if there were a few secret passages in this place. It's just that big," Tucker said.

"There are," Paulina said.

"Really?" Tucker leapt up, bracing himself on the armrest, bouncing on his knees as he grinned at her. "Wait." His smile fell and his eyes narrowed. "How would you know?"

"Sam and I had a forbidden romance in middle school that ended up breaking her heart and ruining our potential friendship forever," Paulina said.

Tucker's eyes widened. He burst out laughing. "That's a good one!"

"Isn't it?" Paulina smiled.

"But really. You guys are square or whatever?" Tucker asked. "I was really surprised when Sam suggested we all hang out."

Paulina's first instinct was to snap that it wasn't any of his business. She resisted the urge, just barely, and instead said, "We're getting there."

It was shockingly easy to stop hating Sam, although maybe that shouldn't have been surprising. The only reason she hated Sam in the first place was because Sam hated her. And Sam didn't hate her anymore, never had. It was the strangest, most liberating feeling. She couldn't believe it had been that easy. Sort of easy. The crying hadn't been fun.

"Cool." Tucker's expression turned serious "Danny's my best friend, you know. He really likes you. If you do something that hurts him, and I mean really hurts him, I can mess you up."

"You have a D in gym class."

"But I've got an A in hacking."

"That's not a class."

"Stop ruining my threat! I'm trying to be intimidating, damn it!"

"I know, and I don't want to hurt Danny. But you should remember that sometimes people can hurt each other without meaning to. The only thing you can do then is make up or move on," Paulina said.

Tucker groaned. "Ugh, you're too mature, stop it."

Perhaps Tucker wasn't as bad as Paulina thought he was.

Loud, clunking steps echoed down the stairs. Sam emerged through the door, her heavy boots pounding on the carpet, holding four plates and four cups. Danny trailed after her, carrying three pizzas boxes in one hand and two large bottles of soda under his other arm.

"Pizza!" Danny announced, hoisting the boxes over his head.

"Do you need help with that?" Paulina asked, eyeing how he balanced the pizzas on the tips of his fingers.

"Nah, I'm good," he said. He set down the pizzas and soda on a nearby table without any hassle. "So, scale of ten, how intimidating was Tucker?"

Paulina glanced at Tucker, who was making an aggressive silencing motion toward Danny. "Oh my god. You totally told them both to go upstairs so you could give me the best friend talk, didn't you?"

"Dude! How could you betray me like that?" Tucker said.

Danny's grin held no remorse. "First, I opened my mouth. And then I said words. Scale of ten?"

"If ten's the best?" Paulina hummed as she thought about her answer. "I'm gonna say three."

"Oh, come on, it was a five at least," Tucker said.

"Hey, I gave you an extra two for the hacking thing. That's at least a valid threat."

"It was gonna be one?"

Paulina ignored Tucker's lamenting wail. Getting up, she joined Danny at the table, helping him set out the pizza boxes, flipping up the lid of each one. Meat lovers, ham and pineapple, and a veggie pizza with no cheese.

"What's with this one?" Paulina asked, pointing to the last pizza.

"It's vegan," Danny explained. "For Sam. Every Saturday we order our favourite pizzas and watch bad movies."

"And who's favourite is the pineapple?"

"I think you know."

"Gross."

"It's an underrated topping! Try it, maybe you'll like it." Danny grabbed a slice and held it out.

"Ew, no thank you," Paulina said.

"Come on." Danny leaned forward, slowly bringing the slice closer to her face.

Paulina laughed, shaking her head. "No, Danny, stop!"

"Hey, lovebirds!" Sam shouted.

"We're not– oh wait. Ha. Wrong person" Danny grinned sheepishly while everyone chuckled at his expense. "Yeah, Sam?"

"Help me with the chairs?"

"Sure." Danny stuffed the pizza slice in his mouth, leaving half of it dangling out as he jogged over to the chairs.

Hovering by the tables, she marvelled at Danny, wondering why on Earth she liked him in the first place. The pizza slices in his mouth slapped against his chin, grease dripping down the crust as he bounced around Sam and Tucker. It wasn't the most attractive image, but Paulina smiled at it anyway.

Danny, making slow progress, bumped the armchairs along with his hip, putting in the absolute minimal amount of effort.

"Danny, can you hurry up?" Sam huffed, hand on her hip.

Danny flopped onto the chair he had been pushing, legs draped over the armrest. "How about no?"

Sam reached out, fingers poised to flick Danny in the forehead. But, to Paulina's surprise, all she did was flick Danny's fringe. Danny responded by swatting in the general vicinity of her hand, missing by miles.

Paulina cocked her head and watched closer.

Tucker leaned over the back of the armchair, feet in the air, balancing on his gut. He wiggled his fingers over Danny, the universal threat for an impending tickle, but in the end, he just plucked at Danny's shirt in a mildly annoying manner.

"Okay, okay, I'll do it!" Danny rolled off the armchair, landing on his hands with his face inches from the floor. He popped right back to his feet and started pushing the chair again, this time with exaggerated effort. He huffed and puffed, and made his arms tremble as his feet slipped on the carpet.

Sam and Tucker stood back and rolled their eyes.

"Wouldn't it go faster if we all helped?" Paulina asked.

Danny didn't respond, too busy pushing the second armchair closer to the first one, but Sam and Tucker shared a look. A thousand words passed between them in that second, at least that's what it looked like to Paulina. Their mouth's twitched, shoulders lifted, eyebrows quirked. Small, silent gestures that meant to little to Paulina but so much to them.

"The armchairs have built in speakers and a bunch of other stuff. It makes them really heavy," Tucker explained.

"Isn't that more of a reason for us to help?" Paulina asked.

"Uh..."

"Danny's really particular about where we put the chairs. He likes the setup to be just right. Right, Tuck?" Sam said, turning a sickly sweet smile on him.

Tucker nodded vigorously. "Yeah! Yeah. Danny knows exactly where to put the chairs for optimal viewing."

Paulina didn't believe it for a second, but she let it drop anyway. Once Danny finished with the chairs, he dragged a couch that had been leaning against the back wall forward. He lined it up beside the chairs then jumped over the back, landing in the middle. Finally, he finished devouring the pizza slice he held in his mouth. Quite a few of the pineapples had fallen off by that point, littering the floor.

Danny bounced in his seat. "Okay, let's go!"

"Pizza and soda," Sam said as she walked toward Paulina.

Danny scrambled up from the couch and bounded over. "Right."

Everyone grabbed their pizza—Paulina took a slice of each—and their soda and got settled in. Sam and Tucker took the armchairs while Danny and Paulina sat on the couch, close but not quite touching.

"Okay, let's go," Danny said with a grin.

"Yeah, let's go," Tucker echoed.

"This is gonna be so bad."

"So bad."

"I can't believe they made a live-action adaptation for Doomed."

"I'm going to die."

"Come on, Sam, press play!"

"Yeah, Sam. Come on!"

"Maybe if you shut up, I will!" Sam pounced on Tucker, lunging across the space between the two chairs, and shoved him over. Snatching up a pillow from the floor, she tossed it back over her shoulder, hitting Danny in the face. Paulina ducked as the pillow hit him and flipped away, soaring over her head and landing with a soft whump.

Sam was already back in her seat and reaching for the remote by the time Paulina rose up. Paulina scrutinized the small gap between the couch and Sam's armchair, and the more sizeable distance between Sam and Tucker's chairs.

"Huh," she said.

"What?" Danny asked, glancing her way.

"Nothing, it's just..." Paulina trailed off, gaze drifting to the pillow on the floor. "It's nothing. I hope this movie is as bad as you say it is."

Danny beamed. "I hope it's worse."

The opening credits hadn't even finished before Tucker went to grab more pizza. On his way back, he snuck up on Sam, slapping his hands over her eyes. She squawked and smacked his chest in response. The next time Tucker got up, to refill his soda minutes after he'd refilled his plate, he snuck up on Danny. Although Paulina could hardly call it sneaking.

"Danny," Tucker whispered ominously from behind them. He struck the couch right beside Danny's ear, although Danny didn't even flinch, and draped himself over the back.

"Hey, hey, hey. Danny. Hey, Danny," Tucker said.

Danny rolled his eyes and looked over.

Tucker brought his arm around, swinging it wide and slow, and poked Danny in the cheek. "Boop." He grinned like an idiot. Heaving himself off the couch, he quickly scampered back to his seat and went back to watching the movie.

Paulina, on the other hand, watched Danny. He rubbed his cheek where Tucker had touched him, a soft smile on his face. Her eyes dipped to the space between them on the couch, mere centimeters. When his bumped his knee against hers, her eyes snapped back up to his face.

"You sure it's nothing?" Danny asked.

Paulina blanked. It took her a moment to remember what he was referring to, but when she did, she smiled reassuringly. "Yeah, it really is."

Danny shrugged. "Okay." He turned his attention back to the movie.

Paulina tried to do the same, but for the first half, she found herself observing Danny and his friends more. Sam and Tucker were playful and physical with each other, hitting shoulders, poking and prodding, invading each other's personal space at every whim. How they interacted with Danny was completely different. There was hardly any contact, at least not skin to skin. They would throw pillows at him, ruffle his hair, and pluck at his clothes, but not much beyond that.

If they did touch him, they telegraphed their movements to be as visible as possible, as if they were warning him. Paulina, a physically affectionate person herself, silently took note of all this as the evening wore on.

—

Sunday afternoon, the sun beat down from a cloudy sky, a cool breeze raising goosebumps along Paulina's arms. It was her favourite kind of day, when the clouds were light and wispy, casting meagre shadows that made the heat bearable. She loved to paint in her backyard on days like this. She loved it even more when her friends joined her.

"So, are you dating him or not?" Kwan asked.

Sprawled out on his stomach, he picked a dandelion from the pile before him, weaving it into the crown he was making.

Paulina took a moment to finish her brush stroke, adding the famed Fenton Works insignia to the front of Danny's spacesuit in her drawing. "Not yet," she answered.

"Oh, okay."

Star, laying down beside Kwan, rolled onto her back and rested her head on Paulina's thigh. "I can't believe Tucker got to do the best friend speech first. He stole my thunder."

"Trust me, he didn't steal anyone's thunder," Paulina said.

Dash yawned. "I just don't get why you're wasting your time with him." He flicked through the book he was supposed to be reading for English, scanning the page but hardly taking in a single word.

Paulina dropped her watercolour brush into her jar of water and glared at Dash. "Because I like him. He's nice, and funny, and cute. And you need to stop being such an ass to him all the time."

"What? I'm not an ass!" Dash dropped his book. It landed facedown, pages folding against the grass.

Star made a disgruntled noise in the back of her throat. Reaching out, she grabbed the book and smoothed the pages out. "You're totally an ass."

"Am not!"

"When was the last time you went a day without punching someone?"

"Shut up, that doesn't make me an ass!"

"It does," Star and Paulina chorused.

Dash grumbled under his breath. "Whatever. I don't care. You're the one who's wasting your time."

Paulina paused, giving Dash a considering look. They had been friends for a long time, just as long as Danny, Sam, and Tucker had been. Hanging out with Danny and his friends yesterday, Paulina realized something. Her friendship with Dash was severely lacking. Nowadays, they bickered more than they got along. Suddenly, Paulina understood the frustration Sam showed during their argument. She, too, was tired. Tired of Dash being, well, Dash.

"Maybe I am," she said. Kwan and Star gave her matching looks of surprise. "But if I'm wasting my time with anyone, it's you, Dash."

"Hey, whoa, wait. What?" Dash's eyes widened. "What are you talking about?"

Paulina put her painting aside, gently setting it down on the wooden deck behind her, next to her watercolour set. "I think it's really obvious what I'm talking about." She crossed her legs, resting her hands on her knees. "You're mean, Dash."

Dash sputtered. "So what? So are you."

"Yeah, you're right. But I don't want to be anymore."

"So you'd rather be a loser instead of popular?"

"Oh, come on. Are you really this dense, Dash?" Star interjected. She sat up, scooting closer to Paulina. "You think people like you? Sure, you're good at football, and so is Kwan. And Paulina and I are pretty. But no one actually likes us, because all we do is hurt the people who don't like us."

"I'm not ready for this kind of introspection," Kwan whispered.

Dash's face scrunched in confusion. "That doesn't even make sense. If we hurt the people who don't like us, then everyone has to like us. Or else we'll hurt them."

"Kwan," Paulina said.

"Please don't," he said.

"Do you really enjoy bullying people?"

Kwan pursed his lips. He focused on his dandelion crown, touching up a few flowers. Everyone watched him expectantly. After nearly a minute, he caved. "Okay fine, I don't."

Dash had the gall to look shocked, gaping at Kwan in disbelief.

"You're my best friend, Dash, and I didn't want you to stop being my best friend. I didn't want you to be mean either. It's not fun. I mean, sometimes I can get caught up in it, and it sort of feels like fun in the moment, but afterward I just feel awful." Kwan pushed himself up, toying with the crown in his lap. "I wanted to tell you. But I thought you might make fun of me."

"Kwan, I wouldn't–"

"You kicked me out when Paulina dated Danny before."

Dash fell silent.

And Paulina... she hadn't known that. She tried to think back to that week, but the only thing that came to mind were vague recollections of her classes. That memory must have been tied up in her time with Danny, and Kitty removed it. Paulina felt sick.

"That wasn't­– I didn't–" Dash floundered. He couldn't defend himself. Nothing he could say to that would turn him into the good guy. "You can't talk to me like I'm the only one who's ever hurt someone! You're not better than me."

"No, we're not," Star said. "But I think..." She looked to Paulina, then Kwan, who both nodded. "We want to be. And we'll leave you behind if we have to."

Paulina would never be more grateful for Star's bluntness. Her bubbly personality and cheerful voice made her hard to argue against. If Paulina had said those things, Dash would rail and brawl against her, but as it stood, he could only stare at Star, at a loss for words.

Star grabbed Kwan's dandelion crown from his hands and stood. She dropped the crown on Kwan's head, breaking him out of his daze. Blinking, he looked up at her, and rose to join her. As they headed inside, Paulina quickly packed up her watercolours, washing her brush and slipping it back into its plastic sleeve, screwing the cap on her jar of water. Careful not to touch the wet painting, she picked up her notebook.

"It's your choice, Dash." She went inside without looking back.

—

Despite everything Danny had been through since becoming a halfa, the strangest week of his life by far was the week Dash did not touch him. No slaps on the back of the head. No body slams in the middle of the hallway. No punches, no kicks, no being stuffed into the closest open locker. Monday to Friday, Dash didn't even look at Danny. It was incredibly disorienting.

"Maybe he's sick," Danny said at lunch.

"No. He doesn't style his hair when he's sick, because it takes too much effort," Star said.

That was another thing that made this week strange. Paulina, Kwan, and Star had joined Danny and his friends for lunch every day. Up until that point, Danny and Paulina hadn't hung out much at school, and they definitely hadn't hung out with all their friends together.

"How do you even know that?" Tucker asked.

Star grinned. "I know everything."

"Dash also complains nonstop about his hair not looking good because he's too tired to style it when he's sick," Kwan said.

"You're no fun, Kwan."

"I try."

"Try harder," Sam said.

Danny grinned at the banter. Of course he did, he loved banter. But more than that, he liked seeing everyone get along. Thinking it made him feel like a grade-schooler who wanted everyone to be friends, but no one could fault him for that. He did want it. At least, he wanted his and Paulina's friends to be friends, and there was nothing wrong with that. Star and Kwan were pretty cool when they weren't being mean.

A heavy finger prodded Danny's shoulder. He arched away from the touch, grimacing, and twisted to face the source. Dash stood behind him, shuffling from foot to foot, hand outstretched.

Danny waited for the impending beating, because surely that's why Dash was there, but nothing happened. After a long, uncomfortable moment, he hesitantly said, "Hi?"

"Hey," Dash's eyes jumped from person to person as he took in everyone seated at the table. Nervously licking his lips, he glanced away, then back at Danny. "I'm not gonna wail on your or anything anymore. Don't expect me to say sorry, though."

"Um." Danny sent Paulina a questioning stare. She looked right back, smiling innocently. Which meant this whole apology-not-apology reeked of her meddling. Not that Danny was going to complain. "Okay. Fine."

"Good." Dash shuffled his feet again. "Can I..." he trailed off.

On the other side of the table, Star and Kwan scooted apart, making room for him. Dash's shoulders slumped in relief. He hurried around the table, taking the open seat across from Danny. The next minute was spent in silence. Awkward, delicate silence.

Kwan nudged Dash, who quietly hissed "What?" under his breath. Kwan jerked his chin toward Danny. Dash shook his head. Star jabbed him in the side and pointed to Paulina, then Danny. It took all of Danny's will not to laugh at Dash's expense.

"Fine." Dash groaned. "Fenton."

"Yes, Dash?" Danny smiled pleasantly.

"You guys should. Come to the game. Tonight. Or whatever," Dash said haltingly.

Danny choked back a laugh.

"Hey, I'm trying to be sincere here!"

"I know. I know, sorry, it's just." He slapped a hand over his mouth, unable to contain his giggles. "I can't believe you're shy."

"Shut up!"

—

Paulina had gone to plenty of football games. She had to, being a cheerleader and all. All night, she and the other girls stood on the sidelines, cheering the boys on, pumping up the crowd. She loved it. However, tonight was the first time she would rather be up in the stands. With Star cheerleading next to her, and Kwan and Dash out on the field, she never had any friends looking down on the game. They were all right in the action with her. But this time, Danny and his friends were here.

They had never bothered to come to games before. She understood that it didn't interest them that much, but now that they were here, she wanted to be with them. She wanted to make sure they enjoyed it as much as she always did.

Excitement fizzled through the air. Classmates and family buzzing with energy, ready to show their spirit. Drinking it all in was one of the best feelings in the world. She wanted Danny to feel the same spark.

Paulina stood on her toes, peering into the stands, trying to find Danny. There were a lot of people at the game tonight, but he said he'd be easy to find. Once, twice, three times she scanned the seats and couldn't find him.

"He's here," Star said, placing a reassuring hand on Paulina's shoulder.

"I don't see him."

Star leaned around Paulina. Her face lit up. "I do," she said. Pushing Paulina's shoulder, she turned her around.

Danny, Tucker, and Sam stood in the shadows just beyond the floodlights. Tucker had an arm around Danny's shoulder. It was the most physical contact Paulina had seen between them over these past few weeks. Sam stood opposite the boys, gesturing wildly, face red. Her hair was falling out of her ponytail, dirt smudged her cheeks, and there was a tear in her sweater.

"Damn, she looks mad," Star said.

"Yeah." Paulina frowned.

Danny threw his arm out, pointing in the general direction of the cheerleaders. Despite being so far away, she could hear his raised voice. It wasn't clear enough to make out the words, but it was loud. The argument came to an end when Sam shook her head, jabbed Danny's shoulder hard enough to make him stumble, and stomped toward the bleachers.

On her way up the steps, Sam looked down and caught Paulina's eye. Paulina didn't bother hiding that she'd been watching. To her surprise, Sam didn't turn her anger toward Paulina. She just sighed and rolled her eyes, shrugging her shoulder in a what can you do gesture.

Paulina raised an eyebrow, tilting her head toward the boys, who still stood in the shadows.

Sam mouthed, "Being idiots."

Paulina couldn't help but laugh. She waved Sam on, turning her focus back to Danny and Tucker. In the time she looked away, Tucker had taken his arm from Danny's shoulder and stepped back. He said a few quiet words, grinned, then followed Sam.

Danny searched the throng of cheerleaders, easily spotting Paulina, and started over.

Paulina's smile quickly fell when she noticed him favouring his right leg. She ran toward him, meeting him halfway. "Danny, what happened?"

"Ah, it's nothing, really," he said, rubbing his leg. "Got caught in a ghost attack on the way here. Sorry we're late."

"Danny, that's not nothing! That could be serious. You're limping."

"Jammed my leg on something. It hurts now, but it'll be fine later."

"You needed Tucker to help you with a jammed leg?" Paulina asked.

"Uh. Yes?"

"Honestly." Paulina shook her head. "I'm glad you're here. But if you do anything stupid, or if I find out you're more hurt than you say you are, I'm gonna drag you back home myself, got it?"

Danny saluted her. "Got it! Have fun cheering. Good luck." Leaning forward, he kissed her on the cheek before she could react. He scampered up the bleachers, crowing with delight. "See you at half-time!"

Paulina touched her cheek, watching him.

"Do you think he knows he just stole your first kiss?" Star asked.

"It was just a cheek kiss, it doesn't count," Paulina said.

"Spoken like someone who hasn't had her first kiss." Star patted her shoulder and walked away.

Paulina trailed after her, calling out protests as they made their way onto the field for their opening cheer. It didn't count. Not as a whole kiss, at least. Half of one. A third. One quarter!

—

As the whistle went for half-time, Paulina hopped to her feet, waving her pom-poms in the air, screaming and cheering. Casper High was winning, eighteen to six. The team was having a good game so far. She high-fived the players as they came off the field, telling each of them "Great work!" When Kwan and Dash approached, she jumped up to give each of them a hug.

Paulina peered over her shoulder, surveying the bleachers. Danny had been sitting near the top of the bleachers last she saw, but he wasn't there now. "You guys are doing great," she said to Kwan and Dash. Turning back, she found them looking at her in amusement. "What?"

"Hurry up and find your boyfriend," Dash said.

"We're not dating yet. I was very particular about that," Paulina said. "But yes. I will go find him." Her friends giggled. She flipped them off as she walked away, skipping toward the bleacher steps. Chances were, Danny had gone to the bathroom and would be right back. She could stand out of the way until then. She only had to wait a minute before a hand closed around her wrist.

"Danny, did you–" Before she could finish turning, she was yanked back. She cried out. A hand slapped over her mouth, silencing her. Something cold touched her neck, sending shivers up her spine. She struggled and kicked as she was pulled behind the bleachers.

"Hey, stop. Don't scream, okay? I just want to talk. Okay? That's it. Just a talk." Paulina recognized the voice. The hands touching her disappeared and she was shoved forward into the chain-link fence. She spun around, pressing her back against the fence, fingers curling around the metal, and stared at Keith. He held a beer bottle loosely in one hand. His face was flushed, eyes glazed, and he swayed in place.

"I've just got one question. Just one, that's it. That's all I want." He took a step forward and stumbled. Paulina flinched away from him as he careened into the fence. "Hold on, wait. Don't go. 'M sorry."

Grabbing Paulina's shoulder, he pulled her back, bracing his other arm above her head so he had her caged in.

"You said... you said you were goin' out with that scrawny kid, right? Short guy, messy hair." He stuck his hand out, trying to mime Danny's height. He went half a foot too short. "That little dude. Little guy. Tiny guy. Kinda freakishly strong though."

"What about him?" Paulina asked.

"I heard some funny things. Very funny. Very... interesting. I heard you're not dating him."

"Don't believe everything you hear." She pushed off the fence, determined to slip around him, but Keith grabbed her shoulder and shoved her back again.

"See, but the thing is, I didn't just hear it from anybody. I heard it from you. Just now."

Paulina swallowed nervously but refused to be cowed. "So what?"

"I'm just kinda heartbroken, you know? I can't believe you'd lie to me. I think you owe me a chance, don't you?" He hunched over her, rank breath warming her face. Paulina tried to turn away from him, but he grabbed her chin and forced her head up. "Just one," he whispered.

A cry of rage snatched Keith's attention away from Paulina. A small body slammed into him, ripping him away. Wind whipped past Paulina's face, throwing hair in her eyes. She scrambled to brush it aside, staring wide-eyed at Danny crouching over Keith.

"Get the hell away from her you fucking creep!" He grabbed Keith's collar, lifting him, and slammed him down into the ground.

Keith coughed and groaned. "Dude, what the hell. It was a damn kiss."

Danny was nearly half Keith's size, and he was definitely half his weight. He had thin arms, messy clothes, bags under his eyes, and youthful fat in his cheeks. But he loomed over Keith, fists curled in Keith's shirt, feet planted on either side of his waist. Danny snarled, animalistic. A strange inhuman rumbling filled the air, one Paulina didn't hear so much as she felt it in her bones. It filled her head and pressed against her skull.

Fear struck Paulina's heart. Not fear of Danny, but fear for Keith and what Danny was going to do to him. A rather vocal part of her cried out that Keith deserved it, and he absolutely would. But Danny didn't deserve whatever hell there would be to pay once all was said and done.

"Danny, let's just go," Paulina pleaded. The rumbling stopped. It made her head feel empty and disoriented, as if the whole world had suddenly gone quiet, even though she could still hear. the revelry beyond the bleachers.

Danny turned his head, inspecting her over his shoulder. "Are you okay?" Opening his fists, he dropped Keith back to the ground, abandoning him in favour of Paulina. "He didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No." Paulina shook her head. "I'm fine." Mostly. A little shaken up. She just wanted to get out of there.

Behind them, Keith groaned. "What the hell." He rolled onto his stomach and pushed himself onto his hands and knees. Head lolling, he searched the ground, locating his beer bottle, which had gone flying from his hand when Danny tackled him. It was smashed, shards of glass littering the grass, beer turning the dirt to mud. "Hey, you." Keith's voice was oddly calm, but his eyes were still dazed, a jarring combination. His gaze settled on Danny. "I'm gonna kill you."

"Run!" Danny shouted. He grabbed Paulina's hand and charged forward. Keith's arm shot out into their path. With the narrow space between the fence and bleachers, there was no way they could dodge around him without ducking into the maze of beams supporting the benches overhead. But Danny didn't stop. And Paulina didn't try to stop him. She trusted him.

"Close your eyes!" Danny called.

She did. A cool sensation washed over her, just for a moment. Unlike the cold beer bottle against her neck, which unsettled her, this feeling calmed her. Liked the chilled arms of a gentle ghost were wrapped around her. It was gone all to soon, accompanied by Danny's shout that she could open her eyes. When she did, they were clear of the bleachers and heading straight for the school.

Eyes widening in surprise, she glanced over her shoulder. Keith was behind them, swerving across the grass as he gave chase. His steps were uneven, but they were also much longer, and he was quickly gaining on them.

Turning back around, she noticed Danny was taking them toward the front doors.

"No, they're locked!" Paulina shouted, tugging Danny back. He faltered, and she took the lead instead, pulling him along the side of the building. "The gym doors!"

Danny squeezed her hand to show he heard.

"Get back here!" Keith bellowed, right behind them now. Reaching out, he grabbed Paulina's long hair.

She screamed in surprise and pain as her head snapped back and she was yanked to a stop.

"Shit, sorry," Keith mumbled. Before he could say anything else, Danny leapt at him, fist cocked, and punched him in the face. Keith went down hard, crying out and clutching his nose.

Danny shook out his fist, rubbing Keith's blood on his blue shorts, and took Paulina's hand again, helping her to her feet. They charged at the gym doors, throwing them open.

"Girls' locker room," Paulina whispered as loudly as she dared. She didn't think Keith would give chase any time soon, but she didn't want to risk it.

"But that's, that's the girl's locker room!" Danny protested.

"And I'm a girl and I'm saying it's fine!" Paulina shoved him toward the entrance, pushing him down the narrow hall until the changeroom opened up on their right. They finally stopped, panting and leaning against each other.

Paulina panted, clutching a stitch in her side. She ran often, but fleeing from a drunk, rabid senior wasn't quite the same as jogging around the football field for a light warmup. Beside her, Danny grimaced and kneaded his right thigh with his knuckles. Paulina opened her mouth to ask about it, then stopped when she realized something important. With Danny's shoulder pressed against hers, this was the most they had ever touched. She tensed, but said nothing, not wanting to break the moment.

To her disappointment, Danny broke it for her. He stepped away, putting some distance between them, and sat down on the closest bench, fingers digging into his thigh as he gripped it tight.

"Let me just check if we're alone," Paulina said.

Danny nodded.

She walked deeper into the room, peering down the rows. A few lockers were open, and some of her fellow cheerleaders' things littered the benches, but there were no girls inside. Stopping at the last row, by her own locker, she softly called out, "It's clear."

"'Kay. Give me a second."

Paulina raised her eyes brows but didn't question it. Danny wasn't as active as her, so he probably had a worse cramp. Although, now that Paulina thought about it, he hadn't seemed too winded. Rather, he had focused more on his leg. Now worried, she started forward, but Danny chose that moment to come around the corner.

He looked bad. Face pale, a sheen of sweat on his forehead, eyes turned down. He braced himself against the side of the lockers and hobbled forward, his limp far more pronounced than before.

Red spots stood out starkly against the pale colour of his shorts. Paulina thought it was Keith's blood for a moment, until she noticed the red streak on his other leg, in line with Danny's knuckles. That was Keith's blood. The rest wasn't. Paulina's breath caught in her throat.

Danny's head jerked up. He froze when he saw her staring. "Oh. You aren't. Sitting down."

"No, I'm not."

"Huh." Danny stood up straighter and took a step forward. The moment he put too much weight on his injured leg, he crumpled to the floor, hunching over.

"Danny!" Paulina darted forward, reaching out to him.

Danny's hand shot out, stopping her. "Don't touch me!" His fingers twitched. Grabbing his hand, he rubbed his palm and looked away. "Sorry. That was rude. It's just... it was too much. Give me a moment."

Lifting himself off the floor, he folded his good leg underneath him and stretched the other out. He gritted his teeth in pain.

Paulina hovered. She wanted to help, but anything she could think of meant touching him. With her limited options, she decided to give Danny his requested moment, sitting down opposite him. Extending her own legs, she bumped her shoes against his, touching without touching.

Danny shot her a weak, thankful grin and tapped her back.

Guilt curled in her gut. She should have sent him home the second she learned he was injured. No doubt that's what Sam was trying to do at the start of the game. But Sam let Danny stay, and she wasn't the kind of person to back down when it really mattered. Tucker hadn't looked worried, either. Did Danny hide how injured he was from them? It seemed to unlike him.

Her thoughts must have been written across her face, because Danny cracked a grin and said, "Note to self: don't run when you have a bad leg."

"Note to self: don't let Danny be an idiot and abstain from medical assistance," Paulina countered.

"Touché. Would you believe me if I said I really am fine? Or I will be. I would have been if it weren't for all the running. Give me a week and I'll be right back to normal."

"Danny, there's blood on your clothes. Not only do I not believe you, but I should probably be calling an ambulance or something." But she didn't reach for her phone. She didn't move to get up. Despite her words, she did believe him. It made no sense. But for the past three weeks, she had seen Danny sporting fresh bruises and cuts that all disappeared in days. For the past year, she had seen him beaten down and battered, and he always bounced back.

"I can't stop you. Literally." Danny tapped his finger against his injured leg. "But I hope you'll trust me."

Paulina rolled her eyes. Crawling forward, she moved to sit beside him, careful to keep some space between them. "Don't be stupid, of course I trust you. I probably shouldn't, but I do."

"It's my wonderful charm. You just can't help it."

"I highly doubt that's it."

"Okay, ouch. That hurts so much worse than my leg."

Paulina flicked Danny's hair. "You're tougher than that." Bringing one leg up, she rested her chin on her knee and grinned. "That was some tackle. It's going to be much harder to convince me you don't waste your time fighting behind the school."

"Well–" Danny scratched his cheek nervously "–not behind the school."

Paulina's eyebrows shot up. "What?"

"You know that secret I wasn't telling you? I kind of fight ghosts," Danny said. He curled his fingers in his pant legs, knuckles going white. "So, yeah. That's what it is."

Paulina had to wait for her brain to catch up to her ears. Danny fought ghosts. Danny fought ghosts. Danny fought. "You really are a Fenton."

"Huh?" Danny reared away, giving her the most comical look, lips pursed, eyebrows furrowed, nose scrunched.

She laughed, throwing her head back. Remembering a second later they were trying to be quiet, she pressed her mouth against her knee, cheeks puffing out. It took a minute to gather herself together, getting enough breath so she could speak without bursting into a fresh round of giggles. "You wouldn't be much of a Fenton if you didn't fight ghosts. I bet your parents are proud."

"Yeah, about that. They don't know, so you can't tell them."

"You haven't told them?"

"Have you seen my parents? They can be a bit overbearing." Paulina opened her mouth to retort, but Danny raised a finger, silencing her. He continued, "Trust me. I know you've seen them around town and everything—they're kind of hard to miss—but you haven't seen how they are when you're really face-to-face."

"I don't know if I like the sound of that," Paulina said.

"They're not bad. And they mean well. But they're really into the whole 'family ghost hunting' thing. I bet they have a matching jumpsuit stored away for me somewhere." Danny's voice strained at the end. A nervous laugh followed the statement, and Paulina was struck with the realization that Danny was a terrible liar. She was about to call him on it when Danny kept going.

"There's a little more to it. Not the parent thing, the fighting ghosts. I don't think I'm ready to tell you that yet, but I didn't want to lie, either. I hope that's okay." Danny ran a hand through his hair, looking up at Paulina with worried eyes.

"Of course it's fine," Paulina said.

He must have been more anxious than Paulina thought, because the moment she spoke, he slumped, relief washing over him. The crease in his brow smoothed out and the slight frown on his lips disappeared.

"You don't have any equipment," Paulina said, switching topics. "How do you fight?"

The grin Danny gave her was the smuggest thing she had ever seen. "I fistfight them."

Paulina gaped. "You do not!"

"I do! I swear! What, you don't think these fists–" he raised his hands into a boxing pose and jabbed the air "–could take out a full-grown ghost?"

"I don't think they could take out a butterfly."

"What about a butterfly ghost?"

"Now that's just sad."

Danny sniggered. Pain still lingered in his eyes, giving them a glassy sheen, but the colour had returned to his cheeks. His smile was wide and infectious.

Paulina knew there was a secret hidden behind that grin, but she didn't mind as much anymore. The meagre time they had spent together over the last three weeks was hardly enough to know each other deeply. But, sitting there together, long after half-time had ended, Paulina decided she didn't need to know every little thing about him.

She knew she liked him, and he liked her. That was enough for now.

—

Danny's weekend plans were simple. Wake up in bed. Stay there. Running from Keith on Friday had torn the hasty stitches Sam patched his thigh with after Skulker's attack. He knew going to the game when he needed to rest was a dumb idea, but he wanted to see Paulina cheer. Besides, none of them could have predicted Keith cornering Paulina behind the bleachers. Danny had completely forgotten about the guy after their first encounter. He wouldn't forget him again any time soon.

Thinking about last night had him gritting his teeth. Finding Paulina had been pure luck. His ghost sense had gone off before the end of the second quarter and he had to check for threats. Thankfully, it was just a couple mindless animal ghosts, but finding them took so long that the quarter was over by the time he got back. He saw Paulina and Keith when he was flying back to Sam and Tucker.

Danny rubbed his thigh. Skulker managed to cut him deep. The wound throbbed and ached, and he itched to scratch at his bandages. It would be a good few days before he could walk without a limp.

Not for the first time, Danny's stomach rumbled. He only woke up a few hours ago and hadn't bothered to go down for breakfast, or lunch. Yesterday, Jazz had been home to bring him snacks throughout the day, but today she was out with friends. It was a tossup between filling his stomach or resting his leg, and he chose to rest.

Until his phone went off with a text notification.

Stretching out of bed, Danny reached for his phone, quickly unlocking it and checking his messages. He had one from Paulina.

Parrot Potassium | today 2:33 pm If you're okay, meet me at NB at four. Let me know!

"That's just not fair," Danny muttered. He and Paulina had plans Monday after school, but he could hardly pass up the opportunity to spend more time with her. Sitting up slowly, he grimaced at the twinge in his leg. It was bearable but still unpleasant. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stood up. Slowly, he took a few steps across his room. His leg trembled if he put too much weight on it, but short, quick steps were okay.

Turning back to his phone, he sent Paulina a quick message.

You | today 2:35 pm I'll see you there

—

When Danny arrived at the Nasty Burger, he found Paulina waiting for him with their food already in front of her. She had claimed the same booth they sat in during their first visit. The food was the same, too. He slid onto the bench opposite her, tapping his foot against hers under the table.

She tapped back.

"Look what I found outside." Danny dug into his pocket and pulled out a pebble, dropping it onto the table.

Paulina snorted. "I'm pretty sure that's just a random rock."

"Nah, it's clearly ours. Look, it has my eyes." Danny flicked the pebble toward her.

Paulina scrambled to catch it but missed. It tumbled over the edge of the table and landed in her lap. "I wasn't ready," she protested, tossing the pebble back to Danny.

He caught it against his chest. "Sounds like someone's a sore loser."

"I can't believe you'd say that to a girl."

"I'm an equal opportunity taunter." Danny returned the pebble to his and grabbed his soda, taking a drink. "So, what's the occasion?"

"Occasion?"

"Yeah. We were gonna see each other tomorrow anyway."

Paulina pouted. "I needed a reason?"

"Ah, no, I mean. You– um... you're joking, aren't you?" Danny wilted as Paulina's pout morphed into a satisfied smirk.

"Only by half. I actually didn't think you'd come. How's your leg?"

"A lot better today."

Drumming her fingers on the table, Paulina raised an eyebrow. "Liar." She stole Danny's soda out of his hand and sipped it. "Next time, don't strain yourself for me. And I mean it. That doesn't just mean if you're injured, either. If you're tired, if you have homework, if you're just having a bad day." She folded her hands, brushing her thumb over her knuckles.

Danny curled his fingers, digging his nails into his palms. He knew exactly what she was thinking about. It was so frustrating, hating being touched. His family was rather physical with their affection and he used to be the same, but ever since the accident, ever since he started fighting, he just couldn't stand it. One year was all it took to break the boy who loved to hug his friends and family. He had a feeling it would take much longer to fix.

"Hey," Paulina said softly.

Danny blinked, snapping out of his thoughts, and met her eyes.

"You know it's okay, right?"

"It's stupid," Danny said.

"No, it's not."

"You don't even know why I'm like this.

"Do I have to?"

Danny opened his mouth, then closed it. He thought about their interacts over the past week, ever since movie night at Sam's house. As Danny's hate for contact grew, Sam and Tucker's behaviour around him changed. Both were slow processes that happened at the same time. Sam and Tucker learned about his aversion to touch at the same pace as him. They had time to adjust to it. Paulina didn't. But she had made accommodations for him anyway. Just like that, without knowing the reason, without asking for it, she changed. For him.

Under the table, Paulina knocked her foot against his. "Okay?"

"Yeah." Danny smiled.

"Good. Because there are no pity parties allowed at the Nasty Burger. This is a horrible place to have a part of any kind. Have you seen how greasy everything is?" Paulina took her phone from her pocket and started swiping through it. "And I wanted to show you this. You can see the real thing on Monday, because I have to hand it in, but I couldn't wait."

She slid her phone across the table.

Danny picked it up, taking in the picture on the screen. It was her painting of him, completed. "Hey, you changed it." He couldn't remember exactly what the original sketch looked like, but he was certain he wasn't fighting anyone in the first one. In the drawing, he held his fists up, ready to punch or defend. Across from him floated a strange green creature with too many limbs to be human.

"I had to redo it all yesterday, since I had already started painting it. But I really wanted to add that in," Paulina said.

"Am I fighting a ghost or an alien?"

"An alien ghost."

"Cool." Danny took in the rest of the painting. The watercolours were beautiful, galaxies swirling behind him and the ghost alien. Much to his amusement, Paulina had added Jazz's hoodie over his spacesuit.

"I didn't know sweaters were suitable for the vacuum of space," he said.

"It's the fashion of the future. Burgundy is very in, especially in space," Paulina explain.

Danny's grin stretched wider.

The spacesuit itself resembled a Fenton jumpsuit, at least what little he could see of it did, and his helmet was sleek, with a wide visor. Danny thought he could stare at it forever. Paulina, however, had other plans, and soon snatched her phone back.

Danny made a noise of disappointment, reaching out after her.

"I'll text you the picture," she said.

"Good." Danny paused. "You know, you could have done that from the beginning."

"Maybe, but I wanted to see your face when you saw it." Paulina, eyes on her phone, missed Danny's brilliant smile. He was okay with that, taking a moment to watch her. She didn't have much makeup on today, her freckles on full display. She had forgone her usual purple eyeshadow and move lipstick for more natural tones.

Danny didn't know much about makeup, but he thought Paulina looked beautiful no matter what. In his pocket, his phone buzzed.

"Sent!" Paulina said. She looked up and caught him staring. "What? What is it?"

Danny gave her a lopsided grin. "You're pretty."

Paulina turned crimson. "Shut up, I know."

"Good."

"Eat your burger! It's gonna go cold. And don't even think about paying my back this time."

Danny took a massive bite out of the burger, so big his cheeks puffed out as he chewed, and gave Paulina a tight-lipped smile. After swallowing, he asked, "What if I want to pay you back?"

"You can't." Paulina shook her head. "That's not how dates work."

Danny, on his way in for his second bite, froze. He stared at Paulina, who took another long swig of his soda and smiled back. A glob of sauce fell out of the bottom of his burger and landed on his jeans.

"Damn it." Danny hissed, putting his burger aside, and grabbed a napkin, patting at the stain. As he dabbed, he looked back up. "If this is a date," he smiled widely when he said date, "then shouldn't the guy be paying?"

"We can take turns." Paulina passed Danny her own napkins.

He took them, mumbling a quick thanks, and finished wiping up the stain. Crumpling the napkins, he put them aside and turned all his focus on Paulina. "What about the... thing. You know, the secret I'm still hiding?"

"You don't have to tell me, not if you don't want to. Not right now. You were right before. We're not grown up. Maybe we'll keep dating all through high school. Maybe we'll break up in a month. We don't know." Paulina's words didn't fill Danny with confidence, but he didn't interrupt. "We're barely high schoolers and we like each other. That means we're allowed to have fun. It also means we don't have to tell each other absolutely everything."

"I want to," Danny said in a rush. "I really want to." He meant it. Paulina knowing his secret wouldn't be bad. It would probably be great, actually. But not now."

"Not yet," Paulina said, finishing Danny's thought for him.

He nodded.

Swinging her legs onto her bench, Paulina twisted to lean her back against the window. She rested her elbow on the table, chin balanced on her knuckles, and met his stare. For the first time, Paulina really did look her age, wrapped in a comfortable sweater, smiling like nothing else mattered but right now. Danny wanted to stay in that moment forever.

"We're kids," Paulina said. "We've got all the time in the world."

[spacebatisluvd]

LUVD

Summary: Adora can read the First Ones’ language. Hordak cannot. (Entrapta has some explaining to do.)

CW: This is fluff with hurt/comfort elements, featuring Hordak’s self-esteem issues, panic attacks, and rage.

A/N: Probably the last drabble I can manage before the final season drops. See you guys on the other side. (Again, I’m sorry for the readmore. I tried. The mobile app is garbage, but I wrote the drabble on my phone, so what are you gonna do?)

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[[MORE]]

The alliance had, reluctantly, asked Hordak to come to Bright Moon. An issue had arisen amongst the clones that had decided to settle there—and wasn’t that a wonder? they had decided—and apparently, neither the Queen nor her princesses were able to resolve it, and Swift Wind had, somehow, made the matter worse. Hordak had been somewhat reluctant, as he and Entrapta were in the middle of a time-sensitive experiment, but he had an obligation to go. He was the clones’ ‘cultural ambassador’—or some such nonsense; he hadn’t paid much attention to the title itself—and fulfilling that role was part of his reparations to Etheria. It was hard to go alone, but Entrapta didn’t really need him for the experiment, and she promised to record the whole thing for him to review when he returned.

So he went. While he worked with the clones—who had begun to collectively call themselves ‘Kin’ rather than ‘Horde’—he stayed in Bright Moon’s castle. The Queen insisted it was to honor his status. Hordak was fairly sure it was so they could keep a close eye on him. He was also fairly sure that’s why they had invited the She-Ra—or, rather, her avatar—as well.

He didn’t mind working with Adora. She was intelligent and efficient—and if a small part of him was proud of her conditioning, he certainly wasn’t going to mention that to anyone—but he really didn’t enjoy the way she looked at him at times. Or, rather, the way she looked at the crystal that powered his armor. He often caught her staring at it, and his hand frequently lifted to cover it on its own, before he was conscious of the action. He then felt obliged to clear his throat and do something else with his hand because this was ridiculous and he was making it worse.

He didn’t even know why she was staring, until he was nearly done with his work with the Kin. She was pretending to be busy, while in reality, she was minding him, and Hordak was actually busy, looking over the contested village plans. He sighed, crossing something out and re-writing it elsewhere. “So, how’s it going?” she asked.

He snorted in disgust. “While I am glad that my kindred are starting to form their own personalities and are becoming comfortable seeking out the things they want for themselves, I am afraid they are also going to have to come to understand that the nature of compromise means that they can’t all get what they want all the time. This should not have been as complicated as they made it out to be.”

She laughed a little, the sound shy and unsure. He ignored it; he hadn’t been joking, and he didn’t understand why she thought that was funny. “Yeah. I guess so.” She rocked on her toes a little, and suddenly, she was sidling over, invading his space. He straightened, perturbed by her proximity. She was looking at his crystal again. He clenched his hand to keep from covering it protectively. “How about you? You and Entrapta are...getting pretty close? Right?”

He narrowed his eyes. “I fail to see why that is any of your business. Move—you’re in my light.”

“Oh, sorry.” She stepped aside, though not very far. He gave her another suspicious glare before returning to the plans. “Uh, did Entrapta tell you I could read the First Ones’ language?”

He sighed. He did not engage in ‘small talk’. He didn’t see the point of it, but Entrapta had asked him to be nice, so he would answer the avatar’s vapid questions. “No, she did not. I do not believe she thought it would be relevant.” He said the last word very pointedly, hoping she might take the hint.

She did not. “Oh. Well. I can.” She looked at him very deliberately as she said it. His ears twitched before he returned his attention to the plans.

“How nice for you,” he said, taking care to keep his tone neutral and polite.

“Ugh! Hordak, I can read what your crystal says, okay?!”

Unable to stop himself, he cupped his hand over it. “I have no idea what you mean—it doesn’t say anything.”

Her eyes went wide and her cheeks flushed a deep scarlet. “Oh. She didn’t...tell you...?” She swallowed. “Never mind! My mistake—you’re right, it doesn’t say anything!”

He caught her arm as she tried to leave. “What does it say?” he demanded, looming over her.

“Well. Um. It’s not really a word? It’s letters that sound like a word.” His ears flattened.

“What. Does. It. Say?”

She swallowed. “L-U-V-D.” He narrowed his eyes. “Loved—it says ‘loved’. She really never told you?”

It felt like he couldn’t breathe.

“Hordak?”

He pushed her away, hearing the pounding of his hearts echo in his ears. “You’re mistaken.”

“Uh? No? I’m really not. Look, it’s a She-Ra thing; I can—“

“I don’t care!” he snarled, the writing stylus snapping between his fingers. “You are mistaken! It is either an unfortunate acronym or merely a coincidence. Regardless, it doesn’t mean ‘loved’—it doesn’t mean anything!” He straightened, trying to steady his breathing. “And I expect you to keep your ridiculous suspicions to yourself. Do you realize how badly you could damage Entrapta’s reputation by implying—?” He exhaled hard and leveled a hard look at her. “She does not need you wrecking everything she has built.”

The avatar stared back at him with wide eyes. “Have you talked to Entrapta about this?” she asked after a moment.

“There is nothing to talk about.”

“Hordak—“

With a snarl, he dodged her outstretched hand and stormed off. “We’re done.”

“Hordak, wait! Can we just—“

“I said we’re done!”

He returned to the castle, too frazzled to continue his work. He paced in his assigned room, hissing at Imp when he gave a curious chirp. Imp left with an abundance of angry chattering as he sought out more pleasant company. Hordak couldn’t blame him—he knew he wasn’t at his best when he was like this. He’d been working on controlling his temper, but the urge to start breaking things was strong.

He shut his eyes, trying to breathe through the rage. How dare she? How dare she?! Did she realize what such rumors would do to Entrapta? To Dryl? They weren’t some isolated nation—they were at best a city-state and heavily reliant on their trade agreements with their neighbors. Neighbors he had attacked and conquered!

Was this their revenge, then? To use Hordak to ruin Entrapta’s reputation, to destroy her small country’s economy? To play with his emotions, taunting him with—?

One of his vambraces started to spark, shocking him. He ripped it off with a roar and tossed it across the room, his breathing rapid and ragged.

Just then, his communicator started beeping. Entrapta. Something like relief wrapped him. Of course! He should have contacted her immediately! He turned on the monitor, barely waiting for her features to resolve when he said, “Good; we have something to discuss.”

“Oh. Yeah. Adora called me and—“

“I think we can get ahead of the rumors if we—“

“—said she told you about—“

“—form a plan. We’ll need to re-affirm your trade agreements—“

“Wait. Trade agreements?”

He nodded, glad she was listening. He started to pace as he laid out his plan. “Yes! You need to ratify your agreements, strengthen the bonds with your closest allies.” He beat one fist against his unarmored palm. “We have some inventions that might be useful to the others as well, things that other kingdoms can use. If we produce blueprints, show them how to—“

“Hordak.”

“—make them, we can endear ourselves to some of the kingdoms that—“

“Hordak.”

“—would be particularly upset by these rumors.” He hesitated. “You ought to...start seeing suitors.” It felt like his chest was being compressed. “That would certainly quell any rumors of—“

“Hordak.”

“—of impropriety.”

“Hordak!”

He looked at the monitor. “What?”

“Will you take a breath?” He blinked. “Just. A deep breath. Like this—“ She inhaled. Through pursed lips, as if trying to keep the air in, she said, “And hold it.”

Not sure why she’d ask this of him but trusting her nonetheless, he filled his lungs and held his breath. Entrapta nodded. “Good. That’s good. Now exhale real slow—like this.” She demonstrated, and he mimicked her.

“What was the purpose of that?”

“To calm you down. You were panicking.”

“I do not panic!”

“Why don’t you take another deeeep breath?”

“I DO NOT NEED TO BREATHE!” She raised a brow, and his words caught up to him. “Perhaps, you aren’t...incorrect.”

“You think?” He shot her a look, but let her walk him through some more breathing exercises. Finally, it felt like the band of steel wrapping his chest had loosened. Smiling fondly, Entrapta said, “Okay. Why don’t we try this again? Adora called me. She said she told you what the crystal says.”

“Yes. I’m concerned. Our...working relationship is bound to spark rumors, regardless of whether or not the She-Ra’s keeps her suspicions to herself. It’s something we should have considered before, as it will likely have broader effects on your kingdom.”

She started to play with her hair. “O-oh. So. You...don’t...? You don’t mind that it says ‘LUVD’? You aren’t...? Confused? Or...?”

He waved that off. “Entrapta, I know it doesn’t mean anything. It’s not as if you wrote it—“

“I did.”

“You?”

“Wrote it.”

“Oh. Well. I’m sure you didn’t mean—“

“I did.”

He blinked. It felt like he was drifting. Like his body was no longer tethered by gravity. “‘Loved’? You meant? That?”

She nodded, then smiled weakly. “Um. Yeah.”

“Oh.” He sat heavily on the bed. “I.” He touched the crystal.

“I didn’t really mean for you to find out. Definitely not like this. I figured that maybe if....” She lowered her welding mask.

“If?”

“I would have told you. If I thought you returned my feelings.” Her hair rubbed at her upper arm.

“I—“ His tongue felt thick. Cumbersome. His breathing was shallow and too fast. “What if. I did?”

She lifted her mask, eyeing him. “Is this just a thought experiment? Or...?”

He swallowed. “I have. Reason to be invested in your answer. What if I returned your feelings?” He couldn’t believe what he was saying, couldn’t believe he was allowing himself to entertain the idea that Entrapta.

Loved.

Him.

“Well.” She rolled the word around, tasting it. Her mouth quirked in a small smile. “We’d probably need to implement some of your ideas to keep our trade agreements in place. And.” She held onto her hair, combing one lock with her fingers. “Maybe go on a date?”

He just stared at the screen. Stunned. He swallowed, ears lowered. “I think I will ask if they can manage the rest without me. I would like to return home and continue this conversation in person.” He looked down. “I believe I will also offer an apology to the She-Ra.”

“Yeah. I think I might owe her a thank you.”

Entrapta smiled at him, and he nodded his agreement, rendered mute by the weight of his feelings.

His fingers traced over the crystal af his throat.

LUVD.

He was.

Loved.

(And he loved in return.)

[karasuno-chaos]

Quarantine Haircuts with Noya, Kuroo, and Bokuto

I gave my sister a haircut during quarantine a few days ago (salons are still closed where I live) and it got me thinking about how some of my favorite volleyball boys would handle a similar scenario.  Likes/reblogs are appreciated! -Giz

Noya

He’s only surviving this quarantine because of you, okay?  Our boy does not do well being stuck inside all day.  He has too much energy and loves to experience things!

There are only so many things to experience in self-quarantine.

But you’ve done your best to help him by coming up with cute little in-home date ideas and couples exercises and everyday things to keep both of you sane.

One of those things is trying to stick to a morning routine.

Noya’s an early riser, so he’ll go through his whole morning routine and be halfway through making breakfast by the time you roll out of bed.

“Good morning sunshine.”

You blink at him, looking a bit confused even though he’s greeted you like this every morning since you moved in together.

“Babe, I think you’re shrinking.”

He looks so scared for a second.

“Your hair,” you explain.  “It’s drooping.”

His hair has grown so long that the gel can’t hold it up anymore.

At first he’s a bit pouty but then you’re both laughing because he looks kind of like a troll doll.

But neither of you particularly like troll dolls so that evening after his shower he asks you to trim his hair.

“Are you sure?  You don’t want to grow it out and wear it in a man bun like Asahi?”

“Nah, that sounds like too much of a hassle.”

(Because gelling it every morning isn’t a hassle??  Though you’re always a little amazed at how quickly he does his hair.  (You timed him once.  It took less than a minute.))

Not gonna lie, you’re a bit nervous.

“What if I cut it too short?”

“It’ll just grow out in a few weeks.”

“You love your hair, though.  I don’t want to cut it and then have you hate it.”

“Guess what, babe?  I love you more than I love my hair.  Whatever you do will be fine with me.”

Well.  When he trusts you so fully like that, how can you say no?

Noya is totally unphased when you start snipping and little bits of hair fall to the floor.

He’s chatting about funny stories he’s heard or random facts he’s remembered or the memes he and Tanaka have swapped recently.

Pretty soon you’re both laughing and you have to stop your scissors.

“Babe, I can’t cut straight when I’m laughing so much!  And I need you to sit still or I’ll mess up.”

He does his very best after that to sit still for you but you can feel the energy emanating from him waiting to be let out.

You do your best to go quickly so he can go back to his usual bouncy self, but it still takes you awhile because you’re being careful.

You love how fluffy his hair is!  Especially right after the shower.  You could just stand and run your hands through it forever, but you won’t because Noya probably can’t sit still that long.

You walk around him doing one last inspection, looking for any chunks you missed.

You can feel his eyes following you.  He’s hyper-focused like you’re a volleyball he’s preparing to bump.

When you finally declare that you’re done, he leaps off the chair to run to the closest mirror.

You’re silently freaking out while he runs his hands through his hair and checks out your work.

“Babe, it looks so good!”

He’s so happy!!

“I should let you cut my hair all the time!”

His excitement makes you so proud and warm and soft.

If it’s always going to make him this happy then of course you’ll cut his hair next time, too.

Kuroo

You’re on the couch binging a TV show together which is how you’ve spent most of your quarantine.

Kuroo’s only half paying attention scrolling through his Twitter feed with his head in your lap.

You’re playing absentmindedly with his hair.

“Tetsurou, you’re getting kind of shaggy.”

He grunts in acknowledgment like he’s only half listening, but after a moment he puts down his phone and shifts onto his back so he’s looking up at you.

“Do you like it?” he asks with a smirk before trying to blow his overgrown fringe out of his face (what a dork!)

“I love you,” you chuckle.  “Do you like it?”

“It doesn’t help the bedhead, so I don’t really care either way.”

“Have you ever tried growing it out?  The weight might help flatten it.”

“I did one summer but it looked awful.  Kenma refused to be seen with me until I cut it.”

You laugh together, though your interest is piqued.  Later you’ll hunt around for pictures of long-haired Kuroo to tease him.

“I’m not the only one whose hair is longer,” he says, reaching up to run some of your hair between his fingers.

“True, but I can actually style my hair somewhat.”

“Lucky duck.”

“If it’s bugging you, I can give you a trim.”

“Hm, I don’t know if I trust you near my head with scissors.”

“Suit yourself,” you say, ruffling his hair so his fringe is back in his face.

You suspect it’s just a matter of time until he can’t handle it…

Sure enough, a few days later he comes to you grouchy.

“Were you serious when you offered to cut my hair?”

“Of course.”

You drape an old sheet around his shoulders and sit him down on a stool.

His bedhead is both a blessing and a curse.

If you cut unevenly, it wouldn’t be very noticeable, but you know Kuroo wrestles with his hair enough already.  You want to do a good job for him.

You just can’t figure out where to start.

“Everything good?” he asks, looking at you over his shoulder.

You’re making him nervous just standing there.

“Yeah.  Face forward and don’t move.”  You push him gently so you’re faced with the back of his head again.

With a deep breath, you get to work.

You make a few tentative snips and pause, running his hair between your fingers and tilting your head as you try to visualize what you’re working towards.

“If you don’t want to do it, you don’t have to.”

“Hey.”  You tilt his head back so you can meet his eyes, raising one of your eyebrows.  “You don’t trust me?”

“No, I do.”

“Then shut up and let the master work.”  You kiss him on the forehead before he drops his chin with a chuckle.

You run your hand through his hair again, feeling how unusually long it is.

Wait a minute.

You can feel how long it’s gotten!

Suddenly you’re snipping away with confidence.

You play with Kuroo’s hair so much that your fingers have memorized how it should feel.

You do his fringe last, coming around to face him.

“You’d better close your eyes or you’ll get hair in them.”

“Seems worth the risk when my hairdresser’s so hot.”

“You won’t be complimenting me if I’ve butchered your hair.”

“You love me too much to do that.”

“Do I love you more than I love making fun of you, though?”

“Okay, you’re done.”

He throws the sheet off, sending bits of hair flying, and runs to the bathroom to make sure you haven’t intentionally embarrassed him.

“Tetsu!” you laugh, following him.  You lean in the doorway and watch as he inspects your work in the mirror.

“So?  What’s the verdict?”

He primps in front of the mirror a bit longer before turning to you with his crooked grin.

“Like I said, my hairdresser’s super hot.  And she does good work.”

“I’m glad I meet with your approval,” you grin, wrapping your arms around him and giving him a kiss.

“Now go clean up the mess you made in our kitchen.”

Bokuto

Ok so quarantine has been kind of hard for Bo.

He’s missing the gym and volleyball and getting out of the house and his teammates.

Extra time with you is a huge positive and you do your best to help him navigate the craziness but he’s just a tiny step away from emo mode at any moment.

So you’re not too surprised when you find him one morning in the bathroom staring at himself in the mirror near tears.

“Hey hun, is something wrong?”

“My hair,” he whimpers.

“What’s up?”

“It won’t do the thing right.”

So you step over and squirt some gel onto your palms and get to work, but no matter what you do, it’s not turning out how it usually does.

“I think it’s too long,” you finally declare, letting your hands and his hair drop.

He looks so dejected.

“So I have to go through the rest of quarantine like this?”

“Well the salons aren’t allowed to open yet.”

“It’s not right.  I can’t be the best ace without my super awesome hair.”

“You’re the best ace no matter what,” you promise, wrapping your arms around him and kissing his cheek.  “But if you want, I’ll try and cut your hair for you.”

“Really?”  There’s a hint of hope in his voice.

“I need you to wash the gel out first, but I’ll give it a shot.”

Fifteen minutes later you’re running your hand through his damp hair figuring out where to begin.

You need to take about an inch and a half off, so you start at the bottom and work your way up in layers.

You have a vague idea of what you’re doing, having accompanied him to the salon a few times previously and watched his usual hairdresser work.

As long as it turns out close to what it normally is, Bo will be happy.  He’s not one to get picky with the details.

You can feel him relax as you work.  He loves the feeling of your hands in his hair.

You run your hands through his hair a little more than necessary, massaging his scalp lightly and feeling him lean into it.

Eventually he starts humming, a sure sign that he’s content.  It makes you smile.

He’s so content, in fact, that when you work your way around to the front to check the evenness of the cut, he wraps his arms around your waist and nuzzles your stomach.

“I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too,” you chuckle, patting his back fondly.  (He’s just a big softie!!)  “But I need you to let go so I can finish up.  I’m almost done.”

He sits back and lets you keep going, but his eyes follow your every move.  He’s smiling lightly the whole time.  You make him so happy!!

You set the scissors down and hold up his hair in some semblance of his flamboyant updo to check the length one last time.

“Okay Kou, I think that’s good.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yup.”

He waits for you to brush the bits of hair from his shoulders before he runs to the bathroom.

You’re sweeping up the bits on the floor when you hear a jubilant “Hey hey hey!” from the other room.  You know he’s pleased with your work, and it makes you smile.

A few minutes later, he struts into the room, his hair gelled in its usual dramatic style.  He sweeps you into his arms and gives you a big kiss.

“What do you think?” he asks with a grin.

“I think it looks good.  What do you think?”

“I think I’ve never looked better!  Thanks babe.”

“Anything for you, hun.”

[vindicatedvirgil]

what are you, a middle school librarian?

me: actually studying to be a librarian roman: accuses janus of being a middle school librarian me: i can fix this just gimme a blank document and some lofi and a cup of warm tea and a few hours

anyways in a discord server i’m in we were coming up with kahoot questions and i see the words middle school librarian and janus and i thought: i could make a fic out of this.

...so here ya go. a roceit fic. uber romantic. enjoy. also a very small mention of intrulogical (so small that you might miss it tbh). 

TW: mentions of chronic illness (i think that’s it)

[masterlist]

---

Being a middle school librarian was, frankly, exhausting. Janus shooed the final kid out the door and locked it behind them, wanting to slump against the door and shut off all of the lights so that his migraine had a chance of escaping. Except he had to meet with the English faculty soon. He swore there wasn’t enough tea in the world for dealing with Roman Prince, the cockiest of the bunch.

It wasn’t that Roman was a bad teacher. Janus actually held him in the highest regards in that manner; he was excellent at promoting diverse, new materials and he kept his students engaged through acting exercises and relevant references. No, it was just that Roman was insufferably handsome and was absolutely aware of it. And Roman knew that Janus felt this way and preyed upon the librarian every single time they were in the same room.

The other faculty were none the wiser as Roman slid his hand along Janus’ bicep, the cardigan doing nothing to hide the grip of the English teacher. Janus wanted to smack him or kiss him (or maybe both), but instead he opted to sit at the head of the table, chin in his hand as he eyed the packet of materials he wanted to share with the faculty about new books and research strategies.

As far as meetings go, it was a short one, and the other teachers filed out quickly as it was, indeed, a Friday afternoon and they likely all had better things to do. Janus packed up his things quickly, ready to go home and make a fresh pot of tea and curl up with the mystery he had started at lunch time, his cat at his feet. When he looked up from one of his many book bags, Roman prince was leaning over the counter, a smirk on his face.

“Mr. Prince, if you don’t mind, I need to get going now,” he said, trying not to seem too frazzled about the fact that they were alone together in an empty library. Roman pursed his lips in thought and reached his hand out to take one of Janus’, before pressing his lips to the knuckles.

“Would you like to go to dinner with me tonight, Janus?” His voice was smooth and it reverberated throughout Janus’ whole body, and he tried to not appear flustered or blush at the interaction but it had been so long since anyone had openly flirted with the librarian that he was definitely aching for attention. “No strings. I just want to get to know you a bit better. Outside of the library and school, that is.”

“Roman,” Janus tried to keep the tone of his voice level as he pulled his hand away from Roman’s lips, instantly missing the feeling of having them on his skin. “You know the rules as well as I do, that the faculty of this school are not meant to have… extraneous relationships.”

“Relationships, no. But a friendship, yes. That is not frowned upon,” Roman said thoughtfully, as though he had refreshed his memory by reading the employee handbook earlier that day (he definitely had). “Unless you’re concerned that we wouldn't be able to remain just friends.”

Janus stammered over his thoughts. “I- No, that’s…” he trailed off, then finally nodded in agreement. “Alright, Roman. One dinner. And then I’ll decide if we can be friends.”

-

Janus was thankful that Roman didn’t choose some fancy, expensive restaurant for their night out. Not that two men who worked for a middle school could afford it anyways, but he didn’t think that his yellow cardigan, black button-up, and black slacks would cut it in a fancy setting. Except Roman… Janus’ eyes swept over the man. The teacher somehow always looked elegant, even in white jeans and a red shirt. Maybe it was the way that his curly hair swept over his forehead or the thin veneer of makeup that was always perfectly present on his face, but… Roman was always extra. And it was aggravating.

The librarian leaned his hand on his chin once he had settled into the booth. The diner was near the school and was a favorite stop of many students and faculty, and given that it was a Friday evening, it was rather busy. Several students that Janus recognized stared at the pair when they walked in, and Roman waved them off fancifully (leaving Janus to wonder if Roman ever did anything without that hint of theatricality). 

An awkward silence had settled over the pair as they pored over their menus. Janus ran a hand through his hair almost fitfully before deciding it would be in his way and he threw it into a messy bun off the back of his head. When he glanced up, Roman’s eyes were fixed upon his hair, his face, and Janus wanted to run. He was always self-conscious working around kids who were brutally honest; but he could accept their blatancy when they pointed out the scars on the left side of his body. Adults were more sneaky about their glances, and he could always tell that they were feeling sympathy for him.

“Please do not stare at me,” Janus mumbled, meeting Roman’s eyes. The teacher stammered, looking back down at his menu, but not before Janus noticed a faint blush covering his counterpart’s cheeks. 

“Sorry, I just… you put your hair up in that bun so effortlessly and it turned out beautiful,” Roman explained, and now Janus was the one who had to hide his blush. He said nothing though, and soon the waiter came over to take their drink orders.

“Can I get a cup of coffee, please? Bring over some milk and sugar with it, please,” Roman said, flashing a dazzling smile at them. “And a glass of water, if you don’t mind.” The waiter nodded at this, then looked over at Janus, who was thrown off by how polite Roman was to them.

“Uh, just water with lemon, please. Thank you,” Janus said, and the waiter walked off, leaving the two in quiet again. Janus glanced up at Roman, though, then decided to start up a conversation. “What did you do before you were an English teacher?”

“Well…” Roman set down his menu, resting his chin on his hand. “I went to school for theater, and did a lot of community theater while working in diners and at coffee shops. It was great, but… I couldn’t bear the hours of those jobs anymore. So… I went back to school to become a teacher. And during the summer I run a theater camp. Sometimes I’ll still do community shows.” Janus nodded at this, pursing his lips in thought. 

“I was a theater major for my undergraduate,” he said, and Roman raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Yeah, I know. Surprising, right?” He sighed, “I was really focused on musical theory and directing. And then… I realized it wouldn’t be enough to support me. So I started working in a local library to help pay the bills, and from there I decided to go on to get a degree in library science so I could become a librarian. I shadowed a librarian at a middle school in my old town for a bit and decided that was my path forward,” he explained, and Roman nodded. “I miss theater, though. I miss the nerves before a show and the costumes. I miss a lot of it.”

“You could help out with theater camp next summer,” Roman suggested. Janus wanted to shake his head but he nodded instead, smiling faintly. It wasn’t a commitment, anyways. It was just a nod. “I wanted to be on Broadway someday, you know? See my name in the lights. Instead, I just see my name under students’ names on their properly formatted papers.”

“It’s not too late for you,” Janus’ words fell out before he could stop them, and he resisted the urge to reach out and take Roman’s hand in comfort. “What’s stopping you from flying off to New York right this second?”

“I…” Roman started, but faded away as the waiter brought back their drinks. The waiter asked for their meal orders. “Can I get the chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes and green beans? Thanks.” Janus watched as Roman’s demeanor shifted from open and kind to more closed off, and tried to fight off the frown that he knew was trying to press through to his lips.

“I’ll have the soup and salad combo, with the broccoli cheddar soup and a cobb salad. Thank you,” he said, and the pair handed their menus off, then sat in silence once again. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that.”

“I was about to leave for New York, once,” Roman said quietly, and Janus watched him intently. “I had a flight booked and a place to stay. But then… my brother got sick. He needed someone to take care of him so I… dropped everything. Picked up a second job so he didn’t need to work and I resigned myself to community theater.” Roman sighed, carding a hand through his curls. “He got better, thankfully, and now he’s married to this astronomer and they’re about to adopt a kid, and I’m so happy for him, but…”

“But you skipped out on your dreams for him,” Janus finished the sentence, knowing that Roman couldn’t, and the teacher nodded. “You deserve to have your dreams come true, Roman. I see you with those kids, you instill hope and passion in them. More than anyone else, you deserve to see your name in the lights.”

“Yeah, maybe,” Roman said thoughtfully, glancing out the window at the setting sun. “But I don’t know if that’s my dream anymore. I think… I would rather see one of those kids’ names up there and know that I’m the one that pushed them to reach for the sky.”

“That’s… incredibly selfless of you, Roman,” Janus said, and he was surprised at the truth of that sentence. Roman was a selfless man, risking his potential career as a Broadway star to take care of his brother, giving his all to make sure his students understand and are successful. It startled Janus, the depth that was behind Roman’s brown eyes, and he felt bad for resigning the man to his appearances.

The rest of the evening passed without much excitement, and as Janus drove away from the diner and towards his small apartment filled with books and cat hair and tea, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he would be unable to simply maintain a friendship with Roman Prince.

-

“So I was thinking brunch,” Roman had stepped into the library soon after the final child had left for the day, startling Janus out of his alphabetization of books to reshelve. He glanced up at the teacher, a bewildered look probably masking his joy at seeing Roman.

“What?” He asked incredulously, not understanding what the other was getting at.

“For our next friendship outing. I know this great place that serves delicious crepes and they have a plethora of tea options, you’d love it,” Roman was babbling and Janus couldn’t help but stare at his glossed lips. He shook his head, trying to regain his sense of reality.

“Uh, Roman, I don’t know…” It wasn’t that Janus didn’t want to spend more time with Roman. He did. Desperately. It was all he could think about at night, in the shower, on his drive to work. Roman filled his every available moment of peace and it was too much because Janus couldn’t bear to just be friends with him.

“Not a fan of crepes? They have other stuff, too,” Roman started, not realizing what Janus was unsure of. “Or we could go to see a movie—”

“It’s not that. I just…” Janus took a deep breath, lifting his eyes to meet Roman’s. “I don’t know if I can be friends with you, Roman.” He watched as the teacher visibly deflated, as if all of the oxygen from his lungs had been forced out by that one sentence. “I like you a lot. Too much, I think. And I don’t think I could bear to just be coworkers and friends. I’d always… want more.”

“Oh,” Roman didn’t look up from staring at his hands. He appeared physically upset, and Janus just wanted to get up and hug him and comfort him but… it would be too much and not enough all at once. “You’re right. I just… you’re the first person I’ve known in a long time that I’ve connected with on a level this magnitude and… it sucks that we can’t explore that more.”

Janus glanced at the sentence he had just written down on a sticky note in front of him as he was going through his emails. A job opening at the public library. It paid better, had better benefits, and he was considering it greatly. He brushed his fingers against the bright yellow paper and then smiled, looking up at Roman.

“We may not be coworkers for much longer, though,” he said, watching as Roman’s eyes snapped up again to meet his. “There’s a job opening at the public library and I’ve been thinking about applying for it.”

“You should,” Roman breathed out, and Janus worried that he had instilled hope in the other; what if he didn’t get the job, and they would remain coworkers and remain unable to move forward from this? It was worth a shot, though, if they wanted to see what happiness could lay ahead of them. 

-

Janus was pacing in front of the checkout counter. The last kid had left for the day and tomorrow was the last day before summer vacation. It had been a few weeks since his interview, and he just heard back.

Roman came in, his messenger bag in tow. The two had been avoiding each other in person so as to not risk anything but were texting constantly, and Janus had messaged him to come into the library after he had finished in his classroom for the day. Janus wanted to fling himself into Roman’s arms but he held himself back, instead waiting to watch as he sat on top of one of the tables.

“What’s up, Janus?” He asked calmly, though Janus noticed the twitch in the teacher’s fingers as he sat there. “Did you hear back from the job?”

“Uh, yeah, I did,” he responded, not meeting Roman’s eyes. “They offered me the job.” 

And then it was as if the world froze in time, Roman’s face was lit up with joy and admiration as he scooped Janus up into a warm hug, their embrace filling almost every need they’d both had for the past few weeks. 

“I need to put in my notice, but… after that, um, do you want to go on a date with me, Roman?” Janus asked, stepping back because the touch was too much and if they stood that close any longer he’d be unable to resist the urge to connect their lips. And not that he didn’t think the middle school library wasn’t romantic, but… he wanted their first kiss to be more special than this. Roman nodded emphatically, then left as quickly as he came, allowing Janus to finish packing his bag for the day.

-

One week later, the pair sat on Janus’ couch after he made Roman dinner, their heads leaning against each other as a movie played on the television. But neither of them were paying it any attention, instead their eyes were locked on the way their fingers were intertwined between their laps, on the slow breathing of the other.

“Janus, I’d really love to kiss you, now,” Roman said quietly, and Janus hesitated. He had wished they had done something more romantic for their first date and now his cat was twining itself between their legs but Roman’s hand was at the base of his neck and then lips were on his and it was magical and wonderful and worth the wait. They’d have the chance for a million more romantic kisses and brunches and outings, and in that moment, Janus knew that this was something that would span his entire lifetime.

[imnotrevealingmyname]

Hey can you expand on this a bit? I'm interested...

Sure! Look, I'm gonna say this outright. I don't like Ross at all. Not that Rachel herself was all that great, but honestly? Ross is REEEEAAALLY overrated, imo.

He goes and makes a pros and cons list (Chandler's idea, no doubt, but Ross MADE the list) and

1. The "just a waitress" comment shows how he perceives other so-called "lesser" professions, how he feels about people who make less money than him. This is ultimately not a superiority complex but an inferiority complex because he's obviously gonna be inherently insecure when someone earns more than he does, which is made clear when he's jealous of his fellow paleontologist girlfriend's (I don't remember her name) ex boyfriends. I know, both of her ex boyfriends had gotten Nobel prizes, but the fact that he thinks that he is LESS OF A MAN THAN THEM JUST BECAUSE HE DOESN'T shows that he feels that accomplishment (slash productivity) is a direct and accurate measure of a person's worth.

2. Suppose we excuse the fact that he made the list. Everyone needs to know the pros and cons before getting into a relationship, I agree. But the cons section has more points than the pros section. This brings up the question, why does he like Rachel in the first place? That's right, she's pretty. She was a HIGH SCHOOL CRUSH, and he FELL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE AND GOT MARRIED AFTER THAT. Rachel had always been nothing but a passing fancy, a goddamn obsession. (I'll expound on this point in a while.) So he's obnoxiously superficial and cares only about beauty.

3. Later when Rachel finds out, he tells her that there's nothing she could ever do that would make him not want to be with her. MAKE UP YOUR FUCKING MIND, DUDE. Why did he make the list then???? Wasn't the whole point of the list to figure out whether he wanted to be with her or not???????? Which shows that he's extremely inconsistent and doesn't know what he wants.

That's my analysis of him based on the list. Now coming to other characteristics.

1. He treats Rachel like a possession and expects her to speak to no guy besides him and his friends. He expects her to give up her social life for him. Incredibly sexist and self absorbed part 1.

2. He thinks Rachel is overreacting when she's jealous of his past girlfriends, but deems it perfectly fine to constantly nag her about Paulo, or whatever the heck his name was. Incredibly sexist and self absorbed part 2.

3. Rachel suggested they take a break, NOT BREAK UP. There's a DIFFERENCE. EVERYONE needs space. Even more so in a relationship. Otherwise there would be no point in relationships, would there???? If a single fight ended the relationship???????? Ross completely misunderstood what she'd said and proceeded to fuck another girl whom he barely knew. (Superficial part 2.) If you go have sex with some random chick the moment your s/o is mad at you, YOU'RE NOT MATURE ENOUGH TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP. PERIOD.

4. That brings up WHY Rachel had gotten mad in the first place. Rachel had work on their anniversary. I KNOW, she could've taken a night off. But it was CLEARLY important, like she said several times. My dad spent SEVERAL of my mum's birthdays, my birthdays, and their anniversaries in a completely different continent because he HAD TO, for work. That doesn't mean he never takes out time for us. We've always found other ways to celebrate. Sometimes timings don't match. There's absolutely no need to be a jerk about it, is there? Now, Ross' nagging wasn't what made her mad. He CAME TO HER WORKPLACE AND EMBARRASSED HER IN FRONT OF HER COLLEAGUES, DELIBERATELY REFUSING TO TAKE THE HINT. I mean, what the fuck?!?! You can't just exercise authority over every fucking thing she does! She's an independent woman, she decides how she wants to spend her time! Yes, EVEN on your anniversary! Sexist and self absorbed part 3.

5. He's SOOOOOOOOO sexist. Oh my god. So much so that I'm making another separate point for that, just to emphasize it.

6. Everything just has to be about him, otherwise he's gonna lose his mind. He can't bear it when Joey falls in love with her, even though it's been YEARS. Literal years! And he feels she still belongs to him! She NEVER belonged to him, she's a fucking human being, man!?!? Toxic and goes out of his way to be possessive part 1.

JOEY WAS SOO MUCH BETTER FOR RACHEL. Never once will you hear me say that Rachel is a wonderful person. She's petty and spoiled, but at least she's GROWN throughout the course of the show. Ross hasn't grown. He still clings to his narrow-minded, narcissistic tendencies, something nobody except Susan seems to notice. No character development AT ALL.

So yeah. I don't like Ross. At all. Rachel should never have given up the chance to do MUCH better for a person like him. She shouldn't have given it up for ANYBODY. It's her life. She knows how toxic her relationship with Ross is. And she sacrificed a huge leap in her career for him. Would Ross have done the same? I think we know the answer.

Now, coming to real life. NEVER, EVER, EVER EVER EVER, SACRIFICE A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY FOR ANYONE. NOBODY IN THE WORLD IS WORTH THE CHANCE, BELIEVE ME. You'll regret it for the rest of your life, and that in itself can make you bitter and destroy the relationship you gave up so much for. What was it all for, then??

Compromises are part and parcel of relationships. Not sacrifices.

[televisionrulesthenation]

S1E2 - “My Blonde-Haired Brunette”

Original air date: October 10, 1961

Episode recap

Laura tries to wake Rob up at 9 o’clock in the morning on his day off. She’s been up since 7 and wants to have breakfast together. He insists on sleeping until 11.

Rob comes to the kitchen at 11 (dressed ridiculously) and Laura is upset. Rob teases, calling her his old lady and plucking a grey hair from her head and she gets more upset. Incredibly, she cooks him breakfast anyway.

The next day Laura confides in her friend, Millie, telling her she’s worried about Rob not caring about their relationship anymore. Millie tells her to bleach her hair to spice things up.

At the office Rob talks to Sally and Buddy about not understanding why Laura is upset. Sally tells him he needs to tell Laura he loves her and pay attention to her. He calls home and tells Laura he loves her and he’s taking her out to dinner tonight.

Meanwhile she has bleached her hair blond and looks ridiculous. She asks him on the phone if he’d like her bleached blond and he says no. She freaks out and begs Millie to help her change it back to brown.

Rob comes home to find Laura and Mille only halfway done changing her hair back to brunette. Laura breaks down and Rob comforts her and they make up.

Everything is about me

We recently took the 5 Love Languages self-assessment and her top 2 were my bottom 2. And my top 2 were her bottom 2.

Words of affirmation are a mismatch for us. Like Rob, I could do better there. And it wouldn’t that big of a stretch for me because I would actually mean the words of affirmation, I just don’t think to say them.

The biggest difference though is gift giving. It’s by far the most important thing for her, and by far the least important thing for me.

When we talked about it, I struggled not to sound like a terrible person. She was being empathetic, saying she has to understand that receiving gifts isn’t important to me. But I was like, I like getting gifts just fine, I don’t like the process of getting other people gifts. The taking note of subtle hints, the planning, the shopping, etc. So my preference not to give gifts drives my lack of joy in receiving gifts, not the other way around.

Then she asked me if I like receiving gifts, how come my Father’s Day present remains in its original packaging on the floor in our closet? So who knows, either way, it’s a mismatch.

This one seems hard to solve because solving it means one of us doing something they don’t like. Not sure how to meet in the middle.

Episode observations

Life before cell phones

Cell phones wouldn’t have fundamentally altered the plot here. Obviously, Rob and Laura’s phone conversation would have probably been texts rather than on those retro phones with cords. But the plot holds.

Clothes and fashion

Rob’s clothes when he comes down for breakfast look ridiculous. Black and white don’t do it justice, but it’s almost like a modern day homeless person. A sweater with holes and stains over a polo shirt I think with odd pants, maybe corduroys. (His hair is perfectly styled though.)

But I guess this was life before active wear. What else are you going to wear around the house on your day off? Well, in the final scene, he’s in the living room, reading the paper, wearing a cardigan over pressed collared shirt tucked into fitted slacks. So that’s the answer if you care about your appearance. Again no active wear.

I’ve long thought the advent of comfortable clothes has to have at least some small part in the obesity epidemic. I am typing this in a T-shirt and pajama pants. If I wore what Rob was wearing in the final scene around the house at all times, I am sure I’d be a few pounds lighter.

Pop culture references

Laura is going for the Marilyn Monroe or Brigette Bardo look when bleaching her hair, but is said to look more like Harpo Marx. I had never heard of Brigette Bardo before, then I Googled her and feel like maybe I have or at least should have. I have definitely heard of Harpo Marx, then I Googled him and realized I had never seen a picture of him before.

Vocabulary lesson

“Is this a rip?” asks the pharmacist irritatedly to Millie on the phone when presented with “a hair emergency.” In context I get that rip meant joke. And you can see that in the third definition in Wikipedia. 10 years ago I worked with a guy 20 years older than me and he was constantly saying he “didn’t give a rip” about something or another. I feel like this is might be a related usage.

Checking in with my mom

Laura and Millie were spending time together “addressing envelopes.” My mom says it could have been for some PTA or charity project. But more than likely it was writing out the return for bills or something mundane. Not only was there no online bill pay back then, bills didn’t even come pre-addressed. So it was a chore just preparing your mail.

She said she never saw her mom take a break during the day. She was always cooking, cleaning, sewing or doing laundry. They didn’t even have a washer or dryer.

I know this is cliche, but I don’t understand how we feel so busy nowadays.

Best joke/funniest moment

Laura, laying it on thick, prodding and guilting Rob to wake up, says, “would you rather just lie there?”

You think the guilt trip is finally working. But then Rob responds, “yeah I would.”

Other assorted thoughts on life in the 1960s

They sleep in separate twin beds. I understand this was just some public decency sign of the times in regards to what you could show on television. Still weird though.

Rob does jumping jacks when he wakes up. I also understand exercise and fitness didn’t really take off until the ‘80s, not sure what the jumping jacks were all about.

Laura’s hair, half blond and half brunette when Rob happens upon her mid-fix, is punk rock. It was played for laughs. But honestly it would be less weird to see someone walk around with that hair in 2021 than it would from them to have the actual 1961 Laura Petrie cut.

You could call the pharmacy and have them deliver. Last episode featured a home doctor visit. It is my understand this was during the milkman delivery era of life too. Is everything old new again? Maybe Amazon and Uber Eats is just a return the ideas from the mid-twentieth century.

Final thoughts

This episode wasn’t that funny. And Rob was kind of a dick. And Laura was kind of whiny. We’ll see where this goes.

[stitch1830]

ATLA Q&A

So I got tagged by @mycomfortblanket​ and @dannyurl​ but it wouldn’t let me reblog on the thread so I made a new one lol. Never really thought about these questions til now, so good exercise!

1. What is your favorite character?

Toph Beifong. Need I say more?

2. What is your comfort character?

Hmmm, does Appa count? If yes, then Appa. He’s a good, chill pal. I’d snuggle with him.

3. Which element would you bend if you could?

Probably earthbending. I like the fighting style of firebenders a bit more, but I think that the element of earth has more opportunities and possibilities to adapt the martial art and then also bending the different compositions of earth lol. Plus metalbending is a dope technique and I would love to be able to do that as well.

4. What’s your favorite nation?

Probably Earth Kingdom. Idk, maybe because it’s the biggest nation, so there are lots of different cities to travel to. I can’t really explain why it’s my favorite lol.

5. What makes you love ATLA the most?

Probably just the established world. If I ever try to make up my own stories, creating the setting and space the story takes place in is always the hardest for me. So the fact that there are multiple nations, maps, cities, and cultures associated with the story, and those background details are fleshed out is pretty impressive. And even as a kid I noticed that.

COULD GET YOU ATTACKED QUESTIONS

1. Who is your least favorite character in the gaang?

I think as a kid, I didn’t care for Sokka or Aang. Sokka seemed useless to the team to me as a kid and then all of a sudden he was an expert strategist in my head. And Aang bothered me because he was a bald kid with tattoos lol. Weird for my 10-year-old brain to wrap around at the time. I love both of them now, obviously, and see my flawed thought process as a kid lol. Otherwise, I never cared for Mai or Ty Lee.

2. What character do you think is severely underrated?

Mmmm, idk. No one from the Gaang seems underrated, nor do the main villains. I’ll find realms of the fandom that tend to overrate characters, so I feel like a lot of them get the love and appreciation they need. Even Cabbage Man has support. Like, okay.

Maybe Freedom Fighters? Like, all of the minor ones. They kind of come and go as they please, and they probably need more backstory than they actually get.

3. What’s your least favorite nation?

Again, as a kid I never liked that all the Air nation people were bald and had tattoos. Not the smartest logic on my end lol. But idk, I still prefer the other nations now.

4. What is your controversial ATLA opinion?

I actually struggle to watch the show now as an adult and after reading some fantastic posts on Tumblr about the show’s flaws. Obviously I shouldn’t judge the show based on bad writing near the end or series finale relationships, but I can barely watch it now without seeing the hints of romantic relationships and cringe or just... knowing that the outcome of the show isn’t what I particularly want to see. It’s easier for me to just stay in fanfiction and read about fan theories and then come up with my own outcomes. 

The show used to satisfy me, but now? Not so much. I like, only watch season 2 now if I want to watch it at all, mainly for Toph and because there aren’t as many obviously displays of Aang crushing on Katara.

SHIPPING QUESTIONS

1. What’s your favorite ship and why?

Canon ships only.

JK. Taang. Taang for days. As a couple, I see them having a lighthearted relationship where they know how to balance each other. They are powerful and strong and independent on their own and certainly don’t need to be in a relationship, but they would choose to be together because they add value to their lives and want to be together. They’ve got that classic ‘opposites attract’ dynamic that isn’t like “I can’t live without you” feeling, but more like “You help me be better” feel. 

Before finding Taang, I never really shipped Toph with anyone, and didn’t even know she had canon kids until like... the pandemic started lol. I just thought she’d be a badass and wreak havoc on the world and be responsible for only herself. And if I did ship her with a character, it was usually Sokka bc of the angst and canon compliance it provided. But after reading a few Taang fics, there was actually potential for her to be in a longstanding and committed relationship with someone that made sense to me. It was cool to find a ship that opened my eyes to that, because otherwise, I would’ve never assumed or thought she’d ever marry or have kids or anything. 

Tokka is a close second because it got me into reading fanfiction, but idk Taang is just feels so right to me lol.

2. What’s your least favorite ship?

After reading lots of metas, I don’t like Mai/Zuko and Aang/Katara. They just rub me the wrong way now.

3. Do you sometimes self-insert?

As far as inserting myself into a romantic relationship with ATLA characters... No. Not my cup of tea.

I do sometimes create OCs that are just like... best friends with the Gaang and went through their own shit during the war. But they don’t resemble me at all. If anything, they mirror the personality of the character they’re close with, simply because I think friendships where characters have very similar personalities would be interesting. We see a lot of opposite duos, romantic and platonic, and I certainly do the same thing in my life (I have lots of friends where I am not like them at all, but we’re really close). But to see relationships where they act very similar... Interesting dynamic. They probably butt heads a lot and fight a lot, but also really understand what the other needs for help, and... yeah. Those friendships seem unappreciated to me. So I like to make those up lol.

4. What ship would you make canon if you were the creator?

I wouldn’t make ATLA about romantic relationships. If anything, I would emphasize the family aspect of the team, then let fans and audiences decide who works best with who ~after~ the show ends lol. I tend to like endings with open interpretation, and also, just based on my personal life/preference, I think it’s sometimes weird when really really close friends get together in relationships afterwards. Like, I’ll think of those friends as my family, and dating ‘practically family’ is sometimes weird imo lol. Of course, I know why those relationships tend to happen, mostly because those characters are the only ones that can relate to the war trauma they all went through, so I get that and love that aspect of it. 

I would certainly lean in the direction of the Big Three: Zutara, Sukka, and Taang, just by pointing out their dynamic, having them confide in one another, or something of the sort. But no one would like, get together at the end.

My thoughts on ATLA, and I’m going to tag anyone that wants to do this! I’m looking at you. ;)

[winryofresembool]

Things We Lost in the Fire, ch 22

aka Caleo uni au

Fic summary: Calypso starts studying at a new university, but to her annoyance her new flatmate is a loud mouthed mechanic who also likes to sneak his dog in whenever. But as she learns to know him better, she realizes they might have more in common than what she first thought. Eventually, even the darkest secrets come out…

Chapter summary: Leo Valdez can be sweet when he wants to.

A/N:  Sorry for the long break! The holidays were a rather busy time for me so it did good to take some time off from writing. But now I'm back for my weekly updates (at least I hope I am)! And not just with any chapter but a long-ish chapter full of Caleo fluff :) I really hope you guys enjoy! Please let me know what you think because I 100% mean it when I say I love reading your comments!!

Words: 3200+ 

Genre: romance & hurt/comfort

Warnings: none

previous chapter / AO3

…

Once Calypso had made up with Leo and Annabeth, she had new issues to deal with. When she paid her rent for the month, she noticed that she only had enough money for one more month’s rent, not even including the other living costs such as food, other daily necessities and school supplies. She had pushed back the job hunting earlier partially because the friendship issues had made her feel too low to care about that kind of thing, partially because she had no idea what she could do, only having a high school level education and no special skills. She had only ever worked at her father’s company and that was not something she wanted to advertise in her applications. But now she was in a situation that unless she wanted to return to the very place she wanted to stay away from, she had to come up with something.

Annabeth and Piper had seen some of the clothes and other items she had sewed and made with her own hands and encouraged her to sell them but Calypso herself wasn’t entirely convinced they were good enough to be sold. She was also a decent enough artist but with a class full of artists just as good (some even better) than her, what would make her stand out in the public? Her people skills weren’t amazing either so she doubted that she would make a good retail worker. But she knew she would probably have to come out of her comfort zone in this case, so if anyone was willing to hire her, she’d accept it.

She was startled when she suddenly heard a familiar voice from the other room: “Sunshine, I’mma head out to buy some groceries and stuff for a new project. You need anything?”

In some other situation, Calypso would have been thankful for the offer, but she was still feeling like a nervous wreck because of her earlier discovery. That’s why the words escaped her before she could stop herself: “Huh? No, I don’t think so? And I can still buy my own groceries, thank you very much.”

“Sorry, I just thought I’d ask… I didn’t mean to…” Leo seemed a bit baffled by her outburst. He was already about to head out when Calypso came out of her room and stopped him.

“No, I’m sorry.” She sighed, looking regretful. “I was just on the edge because I just noticed my financial situation isn’t exactly the best… But that is something I need to figure out on my own, I don’t want charity.”

“Well, I wasn’t gonna buy you a car or anything,” Leo tried to crack a joke. “Just thought that if you’re running out of milk or something, I could have saved you the trouble… Since I’m going there anyway…”

“Oh… no, I don’t think I need anything,” she said, this time a lot softer. “But thank you for asking.”

“No prob, Sunshine,” Leo replied, looking relieved now that he knew she wasn’t actually angry at him. “But hey, if you do need help with, like, searching for a job, or something, I’m your man.”

Calypso tried to keep her face neutral even though she had a feeling her cheeks were probably red. “I’ll… keep that in my mind.”

“Well, see you soon,” Leo said after the two just kept staring at each other for a while. He seemed to be sizing her, possibly still a bit thrown off by her weird reaction before he put his coat on (Calypso noticed it was the same shade of red as a lot of his shirts seemed to be. And it was also rather snugly fit, definitely not a bad sight, she thought before she had time to stop herself) and took his bags, leaving her alone.

“See you,” she said quietly when the door was already closed.

Once sure that Leo was far enough and not coming back, Calypso leaned her back against the wall of her room, sliding down into a sitting position on the floor. Throwing her head back, she groaned at herself. She had thought that the small falling out they had had because of the Percy incident might have affected her feelings towards Leo, but it seemed to become clearer and clearer every day that wasn’t the case. Even if she had admitted to Hazel and Annabeth that those feelings were not quite flatmate like, it was a whole different thing to really come to terms with that fact. She was falling quite hard.

The more she thought about it, the more she freaked out. Her relationships before one faithful day during her teenage years had failed badly (and that was over 5 years ago anyway) and the online dating she had done afterwards… Well, now that Calypso thought about it, only the conversation with Percy had seemed to be going somewhere. All the people she had cared about had left her and never come back. That, along with the fact that she had spent a lot of time alone in the past, had left her scared of relationships and ruined her self esteem, making her think that she simply wasn’t good enough. If Leo left too… she wasn’t sure how she’d handle that. Not to even mention, her dad was still probably looking for her and getting Leo mixed into that would be very dangerous for him. No matter what Annabeth said about wanting to help.

Biting her lip, she decided there was only one option. No matter what she felt, she should try to treat Leo just like any of her friends and conceal her true feelings. Having Leo in her life just as a flatmate was way better than not having him in it at all. When she remembered her friends’ hints that perhaps Leo himself wasn’t as indifferent to her as he probably should be, she suddenly felt like crying. In different circumstances… maybe they could be happy together, go on dates, hold hands… Now she would inevitably have to let him go when someone else would realize that Leo was a great person worth dating.

Calypso didn’t know how long she had been sitting there, and she also hadn’t noticed that there were tears running down her cheeks. She didn’t snap out of her daze until she heard the front door clunking again, this time indicating that Leo had already returned.

“Please just ignore me…” Calypso ranted in her head, but no luck. She heard steps from outside her room, stopping right in front of it. Swiping her wet cheeks quickly into her hands, she stood up from the floor just in time for Leo to knock on her door. Calypso didn’t really want to open it when she was in that emotional state but she knew that not answering would raise even more questions. Her messy looks she could always try to shrug off as a ‘bad day’, she decided.

“Yeah?” she asked weakly, opening the door to reveal her flatmate with that stupid trademark grin of his on his face. He seemed pretty happy about something he had or was about to do. The late autumn wind had made his curly hair even messier than usual and his cheeks were red from the cold weather and the exercise but his eyes were sparkling excitedly, like he couldn’t wait to show her something. He started: “I went to the hardware store and…” He quickly stopped when he noticed Calypso’s expression and puffy eyes. His happiness immediately melted away. “Hey, what’s wrong? Have you been crying?”

“It’s been a rough day,” Calypso sighed, looking down. “Don’t worry, I was just being overwhelmed by the loads of uni work before the exam season. And like I told you before, I need a job… But… it’s nothing I can’t handle.”

“Alright, if you’re sure…” Leo narrowed his eyes slightly, probably sensing that she wasn’t telling him the entire truth. “But yeah, I was gonna give you something. Hope it cheers you up a bit. He handed her a tiny packet of what seemed like flower seeds but before Calypso had time to read the text on it, he started explaining.

“So, I was gonna tell you that I went to the hardware store to buy me some supplies, and you know how they sell all kinds of seeds there as well? Well, I just happened to notice these while waiting for my turn to pay for my stuff and I just randomly decided to buy them.”

“But… why?” Calypso asked, finally looking at Leo directly.

“Um…” He started rubbing the back of his neck. “Remember when Festus jumped on your desk and broke it? There was a plant on it too… and I never replaced it. When I saw those,” he nodded towards the packet Calypso was holding, “I remembered that the plant looked like that… At least I think it did… I’m no good with that kind of stuff… But I know you care about your plants… so I thought it’d be only fair if I got you those. I know it’s not gonna be the exact same one you had, but…”

Leo didn’t manage to finish his sentence because Calypso couldn’t contain her feelings anymore. She closed the space between them and hugged him even tighter than the time they had had a game night with Jason and Piper. No one had gotten anything for her in years, and even if the seed bags didn’t cost much, it was the thought that mattered way more to her. She had never expected him to remember such a detail from several months ago when they hadn’t even been friends, but apparently he did.

“Uh, Cal, some air would be nice,” Leo said jokingly when it started seeming she didn’t even want to let him go. He didn’t attempt to break the hug, though, instead gently stroking her back. “Wow, Sunshine,” he said in an attempt to lighten the mood, “You’d think I bought you a house based on your reaction.”

Calypso raised her head from his shoulder, giving him a half hearted glare as she broke the hug.

“I’m not allowed to be thankful for a gift? You don’t know… You don’t understand…”

“Understand what?” Leo raised his eyebrows.

Calypso took a deep breath before answering. “I haven’t gotten gifts from anyone since I turned 16. And even then it was just… uh, never mind. The point is that I’m not used to such nice gestures… And I didn’t think you’d remember… It was my favorite plant. So excuse me if I’m feeling a bit emotional because your gift was more thoughtful than you probably realized.”

“OK, sorry,” Leo apologized quickly. “If you’re not used to nice gestures, I’m not used to displays of affection so I got a bit surprised, that’s all… Well, either way, I’m glad I got you something you care about.”

Calypso’s expression softened again. “Yeah. Thank you. I’m sure they will look pretty.”

Suddenly Calypso realized she was feeling a little dizzy, not sure if from the crying or from the smell of the mechanic oil she had just smelled on Leo’s shirt as she had hugged him. Sitting down on her bed, she leaned her face into her hands.

“Um, are you really OK?” Leo asked. “I know it’s not any of my business, but… if I can help you somehow, let me know.”

After a while, Calypso looked up from her hands, having half expected Leo to leave already. “If you happen to know anyone who’d be willing to hire an inexperienced, uneducated young woman, sure, be my guest,” she muttered.

“Hey.” Leo sat down next to Calypso on her bed, nudging her arm slightly. “Where’s the Calypso who has told me to fight my fear? I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who’d be willing to hire you if they knew how talented you are.”

“Wait… what?” Calypso wasn’t sure if she had heard right. Even if they had been friendly towards each other for a while now, she didn’t remember Leo complimenting her like that before. “Why would you say that?”

“Because it’s true!” Leo exclaimed, his eyes gleaming fiercely the same way Calypso had seen a couple of times earlier. “You are a talented person and even I can see that. You can draw and paint – I bet you’d do way better blueprints for machines than I do. To be honest, I’d probably hire you to do that if I could. You create a lot of things with your own hands – like that one dress you wore the other day, right? Like, OK, I wear overalls all the time so you can take my opinion with a grain of salt, but I thought it looked neat.”

“But…”

“But there are other things as well,” Leo continued persistently. “You know a lot and you’re always working on something – if not something university related, you take care of your plants or bake or something like that – and I think under that hard cover of yours you’re actually a super caring person. I dunno, those are things that at least I value. But maybe I’m the weird one here.” He rolled his eyes as if everything he had just said had been very obvious.

“Leo…” Calypso just stared at him with wide eyes, not finding the right words. She hadn’t been emotionally prepared for Leo showering her with compliments. If her cheeks had felt warm earlier, they were definitely burning now, and her eyes felt weird too… like she was going to cry again. “I…”

“Shhh. Crying doesn’t suit you, Sunshine. Luckily Uncle Leo is good at bad jokes that make the ladies laugh. How about this: What do you give to a sick lemon? Or… why didn't the astronaut come home to his wife?”

“Leonidas,” Calypso repeated but this time she did it with an annoyed groan. That was apparently what Leo had wished, though, because he grinned at her in return.

“Alright, I won’t finish that one!” he raised his hands up. “But it did work because there’s still some spice left in you. That’s what I wanted to see.”

“You’re the only person I know who can literally go from 100 to 0 when trying to cheer someone up,” Calypso said, but her mouth twitched. “But thanks. As much as I hate to admit it, I think it might have worked. For your information,” she added unexpectedly, “you give lemon aid to a sick lemon and the astronaut needed his space.”

“I think my job here is done,” Leo said approvingly, taking one step closer to her. Calypso had seen his brown eyes sparkling when he was happy and burning when he was mad but now she thought they seemed soft and warm, unlike she had seen before. And her heart skipped a beat when she registered that the reason for the warmth might have been… she herself. He looked at her right in the eyes and brushed a lock of her hair behind her ear before his fingers moved to her face. He brushed some of the wetness off with his thumb and for one, short second Calypso thought that he also wanted to do something else… touch her jaw, her lips… But that moment ended fast when he cleared his throat and pulled his hand away. One, tiny part of Calypso’s brain yelled: “no!” while the rational part tried to be relieved.

“Um… You had something there…” Leo tried to brush his previous actions off. “Anyway. Like I said I have no doubt someone wouldn’t hire you. But now that I think of it, I remember hearing from my moms that one of their friends is looking for a holiday helper at her flower shop that is quite near Waystation. The holidays are always a busy time there and the owner’s daughter, who has usually been the one helping, has moved away, so they could really use an extra hand.”

“A flower shop?” Calypso asked, hope starting to flicker in her eyes. “Do you think they may have a lot of applicants?”

“Who knows.” Leo shrugged. “I think it might be a pretty popular place… but you can’t win if you don’t try, huh?”

“Yeah. You’re right,” Calypso agreed. “Do you know how I can contact the place?”

“Hold on for a moment. I can call Emmie and ask,” Leo said and left Calypso alone in her room, baffled by what had just happened but also a bit hopeful. Maybe at least something would turn out right even if her social life would probably continue to be a mess.

A few minutes later Leo returned with a piece of paper in his hands and a satisfied expression on his face. It told Calypso that he had managed to get the number.

“Here you go, Sunshine! Hope you’ll still remember me and how I helped you when you become rich and famous.” He winked.

“I know I’ve told you this before but you really are a weirdo,” Calypso shot back but took the piece of paper gratefully. She excused herself to make a phone call and managed to get a hold of the owner of the flower shop who suggested a meeting for the next day. After finishing the phone call, Calypso searched for Leo who had withdrawn into the living room to watch a movie.

“So… I’m going to have an interview with the owner tomorrow,” she told him. “Keep your thumbs up that it will go fine. I’m kind of nervous, to be honest.”

“I’d keep even my big toes up if needed but I think you’re gonna do great,” Leo noted. “For reals. Have some faith.”

“Easier said than done,” Calypso sighed. “You probably understand.”

“I… yeah,” Leo admitted, thinking about one moment only about a week earlier when he had felt like nothing would work out. “But for what it’s worth, there are people who do support you.”

“You too?” Calypso asked carefully even though she was a bit scared of his answer.

“Yeah, me included.” Leo nodded.

“Listen, Leo… Thanks… for everything you’ve done for me today. Not just the seeds and the phone number, the emotional support too. It really helped.”

She surprised even herself by leaning closer to Leo and giving him a quick peck on his cheek. He went completely speechless and just rubbed the spot on his cheek Calypso had kissed absentmindedly as Calypso waited for him to say something.

“Uhh… you… you’re welcome?” he finally stuttered when Calypso had already started thinking she had crossed some line with the cheek kiss and they were back on square one.

“I should probably go back to do some research…” she said. “I’ve had a hard time focusing on anything lately but I’m feeling better now so hopefully I will manage to make some progress with some assignments. Have fun with your movie!” She attempted to sound cheerful even though the two sides of her brain were having an intense battle in that moment. One said: ‘why don’t you just stay with him? The assignment can wait!” while the other side wanted to run from that situation before Calypso did something she would regret.

“Alright… Thanks. And good luck with that!” Leo said. Calypso was convinced that she just imagined it but to her he had seemed just a bit disappointed that she hadn’t joined him. When she was back in her room, she exhaled sharply. So much for that ‘being just friends’. She would really have to start working harder on that before someone got hurt.

[dhufflebee]

damned thoughts, damning decisions  (a Glee fanfiction)

One-shot Fandom: Glee Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Jesse St. James; Rachel Berry   Additional Tags: Missing Scene; Confrontations; trying to make sense of Jesse's face-heel turn in "Funk"; Slight blackmail; Shelby is terrible (sorry)

Also read on:  AO3  |  ff.net Summary: Jesse is summoned by Shelby and given an ultimatum. A change (a betrayal?) of that kind needs some sort of reason, though, even for a mess of a teenager like he is.

I know it’s been years, but I’m still pissed at the bad writing re: Jesse at the end of season 1. He did have his dickish moments throughout the episodes, sure, but such an abrupt change in behavior makes no sense – there was no context or explanation at all, and we deserved more, as did the characters. I don’t think the events in Funk were part of the plan from the start (because nothing that happens or is said beforehand supports it), and I’m convinced that it was a later development, and an unwelcome one at that.

Hence, this bridge-the-gap scene that’s been on my mind since the first time I watched the show. I’ve read some great fics about this plot point over the years; I guess it was time to write mine. it’s not elaborate nor particularly insightful – mostly Jesse being a conflicted teenager under pressure and (sadly) an all-around mess. I just wish they’d put something in the show so the whole situation would feel less out of the blue.

Lastly, sorry to Shelby fans, but I kind of hate her. Also, peer pressure is a bitch (and I’m sure it played a huge part in the whole debacle, even if I just hint at it in this fic).

“So, what happened to ‘I regret never getting to hold her’ and all that?” Jesse asked with a hard voice, and dropped his school bag unceremoniously on the ground. He was tired after the drive from Lima to Akron on a school-day afternoon, and annoyed about being rudely summoned like some sort of minion. (He guessed he was a bit angry at himself as well, because it was not like he’d protested all that much.) Mostly, though, he was pissed at Shelby for the way she’d treated Rachel, his anger fueled by the fresh memory of his girlfriend tearfully recounting how she’d been rejected by her mother. Again.

“I beg your pardon?” Shelby retorted, arching an eyebrow, a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

“That whole convoluted plan just so you could finally meet Rachel, and then that’s how you treat her?” Jesse tried to keep his voice steady, but the situation and Shelby’s blasé attitude were making his blood boil.

“Who do you think you are, our family counselor?” Shelby sneered, and Jesse barely suppressed the urge to up and leave right then and there. “What I decide to do with my life is none of your business.”

“It kinda is, though,” Jesse spat, bitterly. “Since, you know, Rachel is my girlfriend, and you are the one who forced me to take part in this charade!”

Shelby stared at him for a moment, then chuckled. “I seem to recall you being ok with it, mister ‘it’s going to be a good acting exercise’.”

“Well, I recall telling you I wasn’t all that comfortable with it anymore, and you ignoring me and even doubling down on it.”

“You seemed awfully comfortable with your spot amongst New Directions, though. And yet, you still went on spring break with Vocal Adrenaline,” Shelby mused, smirking unkindly.

Jesse inhaled sharply, clenched his fists and looked at his feet, the shame that had been in the back of his mind for the past months flaring up. “That’s not fair,” he whispered. “It was just Andy and a couple of others—they’re my friends…”

“Anyway,” Shelby interjected, matter-of-factly. “I don’t care about your holidays, and I don’t have any more time to waste. I told you to come here to say this—you’re coming back to Carmel by the end of the week.”

Jesse’s head shot up, and he stared at Shelby in utter bewilderment. “What? No!”

“Oh, I’m sorry—was there anything in our arrangement that made you believe I’d let you spend the rest of the year in that mediocre school?” she asked, sarcasm dripping from very word.

“But I thought—” Jesse frowned, and shook his head; he didn’t know how to finish the sentence (really, what had he been thinking?).

“You clearly didn’t,” Shelby said, raising her eyebrows. “I want you back in this auditorium by Friday. And I won’t be accepting excuses.”

“But I can’t!” Jesse pleaded. “What about Rachel?”

“Oh, Rachel understands that I’m not in the right headspace to be her mom at the moment,” Shelby answered, waiving her hand nonchalantly. “She was very sympathetic.”

Jesse’s anger came back in full force, burning at the pit of his stomach. “It was all a front, just so you know. She didn’t want you to feel like she was a burden, but honest to God, in hindsight she should have raged at you for being a —”

“Don’t you dare,” Shelby hissed, shutting him up. “You have no say in the matter.”

“I do, too! I’m owed the right to speak my mind,” Jesse exclaimed. “And whatever the circumstances, Rachel is still my girlfriend.”

“Yeah well, that has to end.”

Jesse deflated. “What?”

“I’m sure you realize that, if you come back to Vocal Adrenaline, you can’t keep dating the lead of New Directions,” Shelby said, with the tone one would reserve for an eight-year-old.

“But I don’t want to,” Jesse answered, his voice no more than a whisper.

“What was that?”

“I said, I don’t want to,” he repeated, standing a bit straighter.

“It was not a suggestion, Jesse.”

“I already told you, though! I like Rachel, for real. I know this all started as a ruse, but now I think I might even be—” Jesse couldn’t bring himself to finish his own thought. He was scared as hell to admit it to himself, let alone to Shelby.

“Well, it doesn’t seem like it’s ever stopped you before,” Shelby shrugged. “I gather your reputation as a callous, careless heartbreaker has to come from somewhere.”

Jesse didn’t know how to answer, because it was all true. And it stung like a bitch, especially because with Rachel everything had been different, was different, and he didn’t want to be that person anymore. He was starting to be ashamed of his old self—it was a weird sensation, but one he didn’t want to forego, and surely not in the way Shelby was ordering him to.

“Listen, I really don’t care about your imminent break-up with Rachel,” Shelby stated. “Just do it. And then come back here, ready to work.”

“And what if I don’t?”

“Then I’ll have to call the UCLA Admissions Office and have them revoke your scholarship,” she answered pointedly. “You know I have pull. Good luck asking your father for the money.”

Jesse was dumbfounded. No way in hell his father was going to give him a penny, let alone pay for his entire tuition. He wanted to say something, but the anger and dread he was feeling seemed to be an insurmountable obstacle for his voice.

This is practically blackmail, Jesse thought, annoyed. However, a part of his brain was more worried about disappointing yet another important adult in his life than about anything else. He hated Shelby for manipulating him and Rachel and the whole situation, but he was determined to not be looked at as ‘a failed project’ by anyone else. His family was already enough.

Lost in his thoughts, Jesse was beginning to hate himself as well, because he was actually considering going along with Shelby’s request. He couldn’t ask his family for money, and he couldn’t imagine not going to UCLA after boasting so much about it. In all honesty, he also couldn’t bear the thought of not winning his last national title as a senior; and God knows New Directions were not even close to being victory material, even with him as a member. Besides, no one liked him there or ever listened to him, even though they could really use his advice.

The thought of helming a great number and raising another national trophy was more and more appealing with every passing minute—and with that the certainty of actually being worth all the fuss, regardless of what his father always told him, and the confirmation his self-confidence (arrogance?) was not misplaced. The voice in his head (a voice that sounded painfully like Rachel’s) kept telling him he was reverting to his old dickish ways, but… well, he’d been suppressing that particular thought for a very long time.

After a while, Jesse lifted his head, his eyes meeting Shelby’s. He clenched his jaw, then nodded stiffly.

Shelby relaxed, and started gathering her things. “Good boy. Now, I want this break up with Rachel and with New Directions to be grand—there has to be no doubt that you have closed that door. Squash their morale, too, for good measure.” She shouldered her bag and started walking towards the exit. Then she turned around and added, almost as an afterthought: “I put Giselle in charge of the whole thing, by the way. Apparently, she already has some brilliant ideas or whatever. I don’t care what you do, just do it well. See you on Friday,” she said, before disappearing out the door.

Jesse sighed, and picked up his bag from the floor. Anger was still simmering somewhere in his guts, but it was being silenced by a wave of uneasiness and by a dull and persistent heartache. He grabbed his phone to check his notifications, and saw that Giselle had already written him a string of messages. He read them, purposefully ignoring the texts he’d received from Rachel in the meantime.

Jesse St. James, as I live and breathe. Ms Corcoran told me you’re coming back and let me tell you, fi.na.lly.  

Anyway, I’ve already started planning a couple of fun things to remind those losers who the superior show choir is

Tomorrow be here sharp and ready cause we start rehearsing

Also there’s gonna be something special just for your girlfriend – we’re not comfortable with you simply breaking up with her. It has to be hard and memorable,, you’ve already played mole before and we’re not willing to risk it

Stay tuned for that (and remember it’s a deal breaker if you want us to back you up as lead ever again)

Jesse groaned, already dreading whatever the hell was coming. He tried to suppress the shame he felt by imagining himself holding a fourth national trophy (which was easy) and trying not to think about Rachel (which was very, very hard).

He spent the drive home furiously wiping the tears off his cheeks.

[hopelessromanticspoonie]

Helping Hands - Chapter 5

Series Masterlist here

Chapter Summary: Training with Nat doesn’t go as planned, and Fury’s plan is put to the test.

Chapter Warnings: Mentions of previous abuse and neglect, minor panic attack

A/N: The gif will make sense. :)

“Okay, stand with your feet about shoulder-width apart, and turn a bit to the side. Yeah, that’s it. Keep your thumbs on the outside of your fists. Now, use the momentum of turning your torso to put some weight behind your fist, and punch through the bag.”

The bandages wrapped over Haley’s knuckles and wrists were uncomfortable with the sweat that slicked over her skin. She couldn’t remember ever exercising, ever having a cause to break a sweat or work so hard in her life. Sure, Steve and Sam were sparring on the other side of the gym, the sounds of their blows deafening, acting as if this was just another day at the office. And for them, it was. But, to someone unused to the strain, it proved a monumental effort to fight the fatigue trembling in her limbs as she delivered punch after punch to the heavy bag that Nat supported from behind.

Haley had healed completely from her adopted wound in the span of several days - not too terribly long considering Loki had stopped her from taking the entirety of Nat’s injury. Natasha, on the other hand, was still taking it easy. Which, for an Avenger, apparently meant settling for running several miles on a treadmill and lifting her body weight in dumbells instead of kicking ass with Clint.

“You can’t walk around in tape all day every day, so it’ll hurt more, when - if, it happens.”

And that little slip-up made Haley’s entire body seize, her throbbing hands spread out against the woven fabric of the bag to tether her to reality. When. When she was going to have to face Mr. Shaw again. That’s what she was preparing for, beating up a bag of sand with arms as thick and tough as overcooked spaghetti.

“Ah shit, Hales, I’m sorry.”

Small fingers clutched hers after she dropped to her knees on the cushioned, sticky mat beneath her. She stared at them, one set littered with callouses and scars, the other flushed, but baby soft and lined with blue-green veins beneath almost translucent skin. Panic constricted around her chest so that it felt like her rapidly drumming heart would burst through her ribcage and tear her struggling lungs into ribbons with the fragments left behind.

“He’s on a mission.”

“If we don’t call him he’s gonna be pissed. You wanna deal with that?”

Cool glass pressed against her ear.

“Are you alright?”

The rough timbre of Loki’s voice didn’t sound quite right through the small speaker of the phone. She drew in a shaky breath. “I’m okay.”

An obnoxious tone sounded through the phone, and she tilted her head away from it with a grimace, closing her eyes. Everything was fine. She was in Stark Tower. She was surrounded by friends who would protect her. Mr. Shaw couldn’t reach her here.

“Darling.”

The hands holding hers retreated, replaced in an instant by a warmer, larger pair not a moment later. Deft fingers worked at unraveling the bandages protecting her knuckles. Her eyes opened to see Loki kneeling in front of her, still dressed in his leather armor.

All she could think to mumble out was, “How’d you get here so fast.”

Loki tossed the wrappings away, lifting her chin up with two fingers to thoroughly examine the distraught expression on her face. “Magic.”

The fear slowly seeped out of her at his attentions but she still couldn’t catch her breath or calm her speeding heart. Strangely, she couldn’t help but long to rub away the lines that crinkled between his brows. “You were on a mission. You’ll get in trouble.”

“You needed me.” He stood up and helped her to her feet with his hold on her hands. He didn’t let them go after she was standing, maintaining his firm grip as he led her out of the room. “You need a sports beverage and a snack. It wouldn’t do for you to overwork yourself before this evening.”

~

Had she overworked herself, or was she destined to feel this terrible regardless of her disastrous session with Nat?

Even with the soothing feeling of makeup smoothing over her skin and a brush running through her hair (there wasn’t much else to do with what little length she had), she couldn’t ignore the anxiety that weighed heavy in the pit of her stomach. It rolled through her and threatened to force itself around the lump in her throat. But practice made perfect, and she’d had years of hiding many a negative emotion and sensation.

“If you don’t stop sucking your bottom lip into your mouth, I’m gonna make you look like a clown.” Nat bopped her cheek lightly with the fluffy end of a makeup brush.

“Sorry.”

A brush painted over her lips in long, soft strokes. “We’ll all keep an eye on you. Fury has backup waiting on the floors just above and below. Even Loki is going to be there. You won’t be alone.”

All those words were meant to reassure her. But when she opened her eyes after shimmying into the dress Wanda had loaned her, she felt anything but confident in how the evening was going to go.

“I’m going to stick out like a sore thumb.”

The crimson dress molded to her skin, dipping down in the back to show a considerable amount of her spine. Lace encased her arms to her wrists and all she wanted to do was tug the sleeves down so she could grasp the material in her palms. She’d never shown so much skin. Did anyone really need to see the lower halves of her thighs? That was hardly her most pressing concern, however, when she factored in her inability to walk in the black heels Nat had helped her wobble into. She felt like a toddler, desperately attempting to balance with each step.

“That’s the point. Come on, the faster we get you out there the faster this is all done with.”

It took every ounce of courage that she had within her to step into the spacious ballroom several floors down from their living quarters. The lights, scattered around the room in glowing columns and hanging from the ceiling in interesting modern fixtures, were just warm enough to contrast the black marble floor and dark walls. The music from the DJ vibrated through her bones to ratchet up her heartbeat until it matched the thudding bass. More people than she had ever seen in her life milled about, either dancing or talking or some combination of the two.

Tony had told her to make sure to be seen by as many people as possible. What did that entail? How was she supposed to act natural, while still making sure she was noticed, when she didn’t even know what ‘natural’ was? She’d never been to a party before!

“Perhaps you should first procure a drink?”

She stopped staring at a stunning woman in a dress that looked to be made out starlight, glancing quickly over at the owner of the naggingly familiar voice. It had sounded just enough like Loki to pique her interest, although there was a softness to the baritone that didn’t quite fit. Nor did the owner of the lovely accented suggestion. The man peering at her through brown, thin-rimmed glasses shot her a mischievous grin. He had auburn hair that curled at the nape of his neck, and a neatly trimmed beard and mustache that covered the rosy skin of his jaw.

But the eyes. Even though they were a twinkling light blue, she’d recognize that playful and earnest expression anywhere.

“Loki?”

He closed the remaining distance between them, steering her toward one of the many bars set up around the edges of the room with a gentle hand on her exposed middle back. It was as if all she could focus on was his touch pouring heat through her skin to flow through her like molten sunlight. Even walking was a bit easier with him brushing against her side, as if he lent her a bit of his strength and surety while guiding her along.

“I desired to be close to you for the evening, and my standard appearance tends to draw more attention than would suit the delicacy of the mission,” he explained quietly, his head ducked down low so his words were delivered just above her ear.

Ignoring the flush that spread up her neck at his admission - he just wanted to protect her - she settled her trembling hands on the gleaming dark wood of the bar. She took the short, wide-mouthed glass that he’d ordered, crinkling her nose at the slightly bitter condensation that tickled against her lips. “What is this?”

“Sparkling water. It will appear as if you are imbibing, but you will maintain a level head.” He angled his head toward the dance floor. “I will be close behind.”

At his clear suggestion that she continue on with the plan, she started moving about the room, cracking a smile that didn’t reach her eyes whenever she made eye contact with someone. The bitter drink bubbled unhappily in her stomach, and she couldn’t stop herself from fiddling with the orange slice perched on the rim. It was expected for the Avengers to attend the party, so she was safe in acknowledging them whenever they’d cross paths. A friendly nod from Bucky, a squeeze of her hand from Natasha, a quick hug around her shoulders from Tony and a smile from Pepper, they all helped to tamp down the edge of her nerves.

She caught the barest hint of Loki’s voice, sweetened with his disguise, at random intervals. Pleasant laughter and an airy chuckle would meet her ears over the sounds of the party, reassuring her that he was keeping his promise of remaining closeby. How she longed to change her appearance as he could, melt into the skin of another, to avoid it all and enjoy the evening. Perhaps learn how to dance…

“Your drink seems to be empty, sweetheart. Care for another?”

She snapped out of her self-pitying reverie, sighing heavily at the waiter who offered her a flute of sparkling golden liquid. She suspected it to be alcohol, but maybe a sip wouldn’t hurt to calm her down?

“Thanks.”

The crystal was refreshingly cool grasped in her hands. She sank against the wall behind her, lifting it to her rouge-painted lips to take a drink, when it was ripped from her grip.

“Don’t drink that,” Loki urged her, shielding her from view of the room with his body placed squarely in front of her. He cut his eyes at the drink between them, turning it in his grasp and sniffing the contents.

Tony, with Pepper right behind him, quickly skirted through the unaware guests, coming up to Loki’s other side with alert, tight eyes and hands flexing in front of him. “What’d he look like?”

“White button-up shirt, but it wasn’t pressed like your staff. Fair skin, brown hair and eyes, with scuffed black trainers and a skinny black tie. Not a bow tie.” Loki handed the glass off to Stark, searching Haley’s face with jaw set.

“Fury’s on it. Good catch there, Reindeer Games. Hales, you okay?”

Why would Loki keep her from trying the drink? What could’ve been in there? Poison? Drugs? Mr. Shaw didn’t like to discuss business in front of her, but she knew that Hydra had created some awful weapons that could be easily hidden in a bit of liquid. 

Oh.

They’d found her. Was he here? Here to drag her back to another dank room, living out her days in endless agony and darkness, taking his injuries so he could commit more atrocities in the world? Her eyes skittered over the guests frantically even as the room seemed to fold in around her. Her quick breaths did nothing to take in any oxygen into her constricted lungs and she gasped, curling in over her arms wrapped around her stomach. She couldn’t go back there. She couldn’t.

The striped blue fabric of Loki’s suit was the last thing she saw before he straightened her up with steady hands on her shoulders, tugging her into him until her face was pressed into his neck, instructing her to close her eyes.

Coldness, sharper than anything she’d ever felt before, rushed over her for a split second before the sounds of the party instantly stopped. The resulting silence was so jarring that she backed away from Loki, expecting to hit the wall of the ballroom; instead, her knees touched the lip of her favorite couch in the recreation area. She sank down onto it, focusing on slowing her breathing and her heart rate as she stared up at the bespeckled version of her closest friend.

“How can I assist you?” he asked, kneeling down in front of her, his hands hovering in the space between him and her knees.

Only when the worried scrunch of his brows blurred did she realize that tears were pricking at the corners of her eyes. She clenched them tight, refusing to give in to her panic, waving her hands in his general direction. “Can you just, be you, again? It’s too weird. I need you.”

More silence beyond her ragged breaths. And then gloriously soft fabric slipped over one arm, around her back, and then over the other. Her hoodie. She opened her eyes to watch Loki adjusting the cuffs around her wrists, tugging them down until her fingers could close over the edges,  before sitting on the couch next to her. He looked like himself again, handsome and dark with piercing green eyes that searched her face with so much concern she thought her heard might split in two.

“I could fetch a bit of water, or chocolate. Would you prefer to get out of that dress and into something more comfortable? I promise that you are safe-”

His mouth hung open, all speech ceasing when she reached out to take his hand into her lap, lacing their fingers together. She needed the physical reminder of his presence. The warmth of his grasp and the gentle rub of his thumb over the thin skin on the back of her hand - initiated after a few moments further of him staring - did more to calm her than anything else.

“Can we just sit like this for a minute?” She hated how she sounded, weak and shaky to match the knocking of her knees, but it couldn’t be helped. 

Too close. They had gotten too close and he wasn’t close enough.

He shifted and let out a deep breath. Their sides pressed together from thigh to shoulder. His other hand rested over theirs and squeezed tenderly. “Anything you wish.”

~

Series taglist: @kneel-before-queen-loki @alexakeyloveloki @from-hel-i-with-love @cleocc @cateyes315 @coldbookworm @rjohnson1280 @bambi-butt @skiddleskaddle @lokis-high-priestess @myraiswack @ilovetardis @midgardian-mistress @lisaspageofstuff @kathrynwynterbourne @bluestaratsunrise

Little Bit o’ Loki taglist: @myownviperroom @grahoundart @darealbellabelleoftheball @boubouinscarlet @iamverity @rt8815 @lots-of-loki @otakumultimuse-hiddlewhore @ms-cellanies @rosierossette​ @thathedonistgirl​ @lokixme​

Whole Shebang taglist: @just-the-hiddles​ @yespolkadotkitty​ @nonsensicalobsessions​ @vodka-and-some-sass​ @he-is-chaotic-she-is-psychotic​ @myoxisbroken​ @brokenthelovely​ @myworddump @polireader​ @wiczer​ @littleredstarfish​ @the-broken-angel-13​ @arch-venus25​ @xxloki81xx​ @jessiejunebug​ @tinchentitri​ @sllooney​ @devilbat​ @vikkleinpaul​ @bouquet-o-undercaffeinated-roses​ @angelus80 @wolfsmom1 @kthemarsian​ @toozmanykids​ @claritastantrum @princerowanwhitethorngalathynius​ @sabine-leo​ @lovesmesomehiddles​ @peterman-spideyparker​ @wegingerangelica​ @bluefrenchfries604​ @catsladen @snoopy3000​ @silverswordthekilljoy​ @villainousshakespeare​