#can you believe i am both unable to stop giffing them AND to color this dark-ass scene

[thjslove]

I was waiting out there for hours!

[fallin-4-ya]

when i think of you

when i think of you

fred weasley x reader

summary: as time passes y/n and fred find themselves completely in love with each other, but there just never seems to be a moment where they both have the courage to do so.

warnings: none! (gif is not mine, credit to owner!)

Out of all the people to love in the world I had to choose you.

Y/n loved Fred Weasley more than she cared to admit. She could not explain why or how, but rather all the wonderful and tragic things she felt around him. There was just something about the way he could always make her smile or how he had always known her better than she had known herself. It had been that way since childhood, so y/n tucked away her feelings in a small box in her heart in the hopes that no one would ever find them.

It wasn’t until their sixth year in which she found a crack in that box. After all of those years keeping the lid tightly on, the constant pains in her chest began becoming unbearable. Her, Fred and the rest of the Gryffindors were sat in study hall, fooling around when Fred turned to his brother Ron and hushed, ‘Watch this.’ He threw something towards Angelina Johnson’s direction, capturing her attention. Y/n turned to the scene happening besides her just in time to see Fred ask the beautiful girl in front of him to go to the Yule Ball together.

Y/n felt the color drain from her face. Of course, she had wanted Fred to ask her to the Yule Ball, and she and always known in the back of her mind that he wasn’t going to, but that didn’t stop it from hurting any less.

She got up from the table, leaving the Great Hall; she was desperate to leave and didn't want to look upset in front of her friends. She didn't need to draw attention towards her already complicated feelings. There was no doubt that she was happy for Angelina, she was a wonderful person and fierce friend whom she adored. And considering the fact that Angelina had always talked about Fred, and how handsome she thought he was. It was just so difficult seeing the person who she loved, in the company of someone else. Y/n felt stupid, believing that she could even have a chance with the Fred Weasley. He only saw her as a friend, a sister even. She knew his schemes, she knew that the possibility of him settling for a single girl was slim, but still she couldn’t help from hoping.

Later that evening in the common room she was joined by Hermione, one of her closest friends. Y/n tried her best to convince herself that no man was worth being upset for, but she found nothing but endless excuses for Fred. Hermione sighed sitting beside her, rubbing small circles onto her back.

‘I’m sorry, y/n.’ the younger Gryffindor exhaled. Y/n had never told Hermione her feelings for the eldest Weasley Twin, but somehow, she just knew. Perhaps it had something to do with her own unrequited love for Ron. ‘He’s so stupid. One day he’ll realize you’ve been the one for him all along.’

‘Thanks, Hermione,’ Y/n sighed. ‘I just wish he could see me now.’

Just then a pile of Gryffindors crowded into the common room, laughing about something and causing a commotion. Fred’s eyes immediately went to y/n’s, walking towards her. ‘What’s wrong, y/n?’ He asked.

‘Nothing, Freddie.’ She responded getting up, making her way up to her dorm.

‘Well, somethings clearly wrong, you hardly get like this.’ Fred said. Like this, she huffed to herself, angry that Fred knew her so well. Y/n shook her head.

‘Nothing’s wrong, Fred, so just drop it.’ She snapped at him, frustrated that the very person who made her upset was the one trying to comfort her.

‘Alright.’ Responded Fred, walking back to where his friends sat around the fire. The weeks leading up to the Yule Ball passed quickly; and y/n found herself a date, a very handsome Ravenclaw from her year.

Y/n put on her silky gown and gathered her hair into an angelic updo. For once she felt like the most beautiful woman in the world. She shyly made her way to the staircase leading down to the Great Hall, and took a deep breath before she descended into the corridor, dress falling graciously behind her. Y/n felt a pair of brown eyes fall on her. Fred. He was entranced by her being. He had always noticed her beauty, there was no doubt about that, but it was amplified to an extreme tonight. For the first time Fred could see the whole of her face, soft and smooth with rosy cheeks. Her eyes were lit and her lips looked luscious as ever.

Fred felt shell shocked because was this really one of his best friends standing in front of him, but before he got to question anymore, a boy with neat robes and a tie that matched her dress took her arm and they proceeded into the hall as one. Y/n was having the time of her life, no she wasn’t with Fred, but she made fun with what she was given. She dancing with her friends and chatted amongst her fellow students, forgetting about her broken heart.

On the dance floor with her friends, y/n felt a presence come close to her. She turned to see Fred, who took her hand and spun her around. She fell into him laughing when suddenly she caught herself, ‘Where’s Angie?’ She asked.

‘She went to go get some drinks with her friends, so I thought I come spend some tie with my favorite gal.’ he gave her a lopsided grin.

‘Ha-ha, very funny, Fred.’ She rolled her eyes, smirking sarcastic.

‘I wasn’t trying to be funny.’ Fred responded, taking her hand and look at her with pleading eyes. Y/n took a step back from Fred, walking off the dance floor saying something about needed air.

She left the ballroom, tears clouded her vision as she walked out to the courtyard. She only stopped when she heard the sound of footsteps on the pavement following her. Y/n breathed heavy and turned to see the man she had been running from, swallowing her next tear and forming her fists into balls at her side she hissed,

‘What do you want, Fred.’

‘What do I want? To not make you upset, y/n, that what I want.’ Fred raised his tone, ‘Now are you going to tell me what’s going on or am I just going to have to sit here and guess, like I have been for the past few weeks?’

‘You really are daft, aren’t you, Fred.’ She rolled her eyes, ‘You are so incredibly oblivious aren’t you, so up your own arse that you can’t even see what’s right in front of you!’

Fred took a step back, a puzzled look took over, ‘Y/n, what are you even going on about.’

‘Just never mind, Fred. Let’s just forget about it and move on.’ y/n hushed.

‘No! No, not again! You’re always doing this, maybe if you just tried to explain we can work this out.’ Fred pleaded.

Shaking her head, y/n began walking away; but before she could walk out of the courtyard Fred grabbed her hand. ‘Please,’ he started.

‘You really want to know what the problem is, Fred?’ y/n shook, ‘The problem is that whenever I think about you I get so- I get so angry because out of all the people to love in this world I had to choose you.’

Fred let go of her wrist, taken aback by the words the woman in front of him just spoke. She continued, ‘If I was your favorite girl why didn’t you ask me to the ball? Why am I constantly coming in second place for your heart? What is there, Fred, what can I change to have you notice me? I’m so tired of being heartbroken. I cannot do it anymore. There is so much weight in your words that I simply cannot unravel.’

He looked at her, perhaps for a sign that she was joking or for her to take it back because if Fred was being honest with himself, he wasn’t ready for this. Fred, the guy who had all the confidence in the world was suddenly speechless. ‘I-‘ Fred tried to get out.

y/n held her fingers up to his lips, stopping him from saying anymore. ‘Its okay, Freddie. I know you don’t feel the same way. If I’m being completely honest with myself I don’t even know what I’m feeling anymore, so let’s just forget about it, alright.’

Fred nodded his head, unable to find the words to say how he felt. His mind paced with thoughts that he was unable to bring to life. Rather than dotting on these thoughts, Fred headed back into the ballroom with y/n as if nothing at all had happened.

They went to sleep and awoke the next morning with no remembrance of the night before. The next morning y/n got up and ruffled his hair as he had always done and he greeted her by sticking out his tongue, which had always been his normal response.

The mornings followed mornings and weeks turned to months, a year had passes and the graduated Hogwarts together. They grew up besides one another, just the way they had always thought. Fred and George opened their joke shop, while y/n began her work in the Ministry, just as she’d hoped. Their twenties came fast, childhood was a distant thing of the past.

Y/n had lost her friends somewhere after the opening of the joke shop and her becoming busy at the Ministry. But Fred could never stop thinking of her. The words she spoke. They way she felt. The way he felt. He had finally understood Y/n’s heartbreak and he yearned for her. Fred had always loved her, but he told himself not to because he was stupid and scared. And now he only had himself to blame.

It was three years before they were finally reunited in person, at Bill and Fleur’s wedding. Y/n was nervous to say the least, having no idea what would come up. Yet, the day still arrived at promptly and as quickly as ever. Arriving at the Burrow she was welcomed as warmly as ever. Embraced by Molly and Ginny, she was asked no less than a hundred questions about her life. They chatted for what seemed like hours about her new job, new boyfriends, new adventures and everything in between.

But it wasn’t until Fred Weasley walked down the stairs when she felt that anxious energy arrive back up to the surface. At the sight of him, y/n suddenly forgot how to breathe and how to speak, she stood a bit awkwardly and waved at the man who stood in front of her, handsome as ever.

‘Hey, Freddie.’ She smiled sweetly at him, despite her anxiousness.

‘Y/n!’ Fred ran to her, embracing her in a giant hug. ‘How are you, my love?’

‘Better than you, I bet. Huh, Freddie.’ She laughed at him. And it was if no time at all had passed between the two. They staid joint at the hip the entire night; partying, dancing, talking and enjoying each other’s company. They were on the dance floor, later in the evening; mostly talking about Fred’s horrific dates that he endured and his failed attempts to swoon girls coming into the shop. He turned to you with a light air in his voice.

‘What about you, y/n? Anyone been striking your fancy?’ Fred chuckled.

‘Well, I been going on a few dates with this one guy. He’s pretty sweet, we always seem to have a good time together.’ y/n smiled back. ‘Who knows what’s going to happen? Life is so unpredictable.’

‘Do you love him?’ Fred spat out suddenly.

Y/n took aback by the comment, ‘What?’

‘Do you love him?’ Fred repeated slower and steadier.

Y/n let go of Fred’s hands, taking a step back from him. ‘Fred, I don’t know what you’re getting at.’

Fred looked at her in much seriousness, ‘You know what I’m getting at.’

‘No,’ y/n shook her head stepping farther back from him. ‘No, Fred.’ She turned on her heals and gathered herself out of the tent, walking briskly away from Fred and the festivities. Tears welled up in her eyes and she was unable to hold herself together.

‘Y/n, wait!’ Fred shouted, running after her. Y/n turned to face him, and he couldn’t tell if those were tears of sadness or anger in her eyes. ‘You need to let me tell you, before it’s too late.’

‘No, Fred. You have no right.’ y/n exhaled. ‘You have no right to do this to me now. I have been second to every girl my whole life and I refuse to be the person you settle for, just because I’m the only one left.’

‘Just listen, please.’ Fred fumed, anger building up. ‘You need to listen to me, because I don’t know if I can ever bring myself to say it again.’

‘Fred, stop.’

‘What?’

‘Fred, you’re being mean, stop it.’ y/n said, a silent tear falling. ‘You can’t, not when- not when I’ve been in love with you the whole of my life.’

She briskly turned and began walking back to the party; but Fred caught her wrist and turned her towards her. He took her in. The way her hair still fell perfectly, even after dancing the night away. They way her mascara still sat perfectly among her eyelashes, despite the tars that fell. The way her breathing slowed when he took her hand. She looked as perfect as she did the night at the Yule Ball all of those years ago, except now she had no where to run, no way to silence Fred’s heart.

‘No, I won’t let you leave me like this again. I won’t let you leave me without allowing me a word in. Not again, not ever.’ Fred said, desperation in his voice. ‘I love you. I love you so much it hurts.’

He gazed into her beaded eyes, ‘Do you know how frustrating it is to look at everyone you have ever been with, wishing it was someone else?’ Fred continued, ‘I have loved you for so long I can’t pin point a moment or a day or a time, when I realized I had fallen for you. I loved you all those years ago when you confessed to me in the courtyard. I tried to tell you how I felt, but I just couldn’t. And I wish that I could go back in time and listened to myself, that way maybe I could have avoided heartbreak all together. I wanted to ask you, more than anything. But I was scared and to far up my own arse that I couldn’t realize what was right in front of me. If I could change things I would, I just hope it’s not too late. I’m sorry.’

‘Fred I-‘

‘You don’t have to say anything.’

Y/n looked down, unsure of how to process the information that had just presented itself. Her eyes lifted to meet his, a small tear falling down her cheek as she searched his gaze. ‘You mean it?’ she asked slowly.

‘Y/n, I have never been more sure of anything in my entire life. I love you, and if you will take me even though its late, I’ll be yours forever.’ Fred responded, with a reassurance in his voice. He wiped the tear from her face, cheeks growing rosy.

‘Oh, Freddie.’ y/n whispered, ‘Of course, I’ll be yours.’

He leaned in softly to her, pressing his lips gently against hers. They melted into one another as their lips danced against each other. The entire world could have ended at that moment, but none of that would have mattered to them. They were with each other, finally, after all the passed time. Fred was sure that he loved her more than he would love anything. More than jokes, more than his siblings, more than pranks, more than laughs. As long as he had her, the world was going to be alright.

(a/n: thank you all so much for reading!!! i appreciate you so much! sending love and positive vibes! xo- mari)

[banditthewriter]

Chains of Fate - Geralt of Rivia

Summary: When trying to defeat a monster, Geralt gets linked to the reader by a physical chain wrapped around their wrists. It’s going to be an adventure to find someone that can undo the curse and release them both. But when it comes time to break the curse, will they want to be free of each other?

I’ve included Yennefer as a character in this but there’s no Yennefer hate at all!

Warnings: Violence? But I mean, it’s The Witcher, what did you expect?

Tags are at the bottom. Let me know if you would like to be added to one of my tag lists!

*gif not mine*

Enjoy!

*****

The cave was nestled into the side of the mountain, surrounded by boulders and trees that masked the opening unless you knew it was there. The man slipped through the opening with a practiced ease and went over to an altar he had built years before. The silken cloth that draped onto the floor didn’t show a bit of wear even though it had been there since the day he found the cave.

Magic had a way of preserving what was there. 

He placed his palms onto the floor and bent down until his forehead was pressed to the dirty floor of the cave. He whispered a few words in Elder and then sat up, his eyes wide as he stared at the altar before him. Magic had built in the cave for the last few years and it was finally ready. He spoke the words he had practiced every day since he had realized what he was capable of. 

A golden, shimmering chain appeared in his hands. He continued the words, speaking the magic into the air and into the chain he had weaved. Every ounce of his magic poured into the chain. It left him weak and feeble, but if he was successful, it would be worth it.

The last word in the air, the man looked at the chain which was now whole before him. Twenty eight links made up the length of the chain. He hefted the thing in his hands and admired the weight of it.

It was perfect. Now he just needed to find the person who could handle the chain. And he already had a person in mind.

He just needed to get down from the mountain first.

------

Geralt stared across the half collapsed building and swore again. Blood had dripped into his eyes but he refused to give up. The monster was one floor up and he would cut it down if it killed him.

It had terrorized this land long enough.

A scream echoed from the next floor and it lit a fire under Geralt’s ass. He hadn’t been aware that there was anyone else in the building, but apparently there was. It put a new urgency on his plan to kill the monster. He hefted both of his blades, one steel and one silver, and ran towards the stone steps that led to the second floor.

The stairway opened up into a large room that spanned the length of the building. Or at least the part that was still standing. The monster had found a corner to retreat to, but there seemed to be a huddled mass there as well. The mass still moved, so Geralt decided they must still be alive, whoever they were. He didn’t waste time with pleasantries or to check if the person had been hurt. That could be handled after the monster was killed.

He moved with the creature, back and forth until he was able to get his sword into the heart of it. As the thing screamed, Geralt saw something dart around behind him. He swung around and raised his silver sword so that it was pointed at the throat of the thing that approached him.

Not a thing. It was a woman. She wore a dress that was dirty and torn at the hem, her eyes filled with terror, but it wasn’t directed at him. She watched the creature writhe on the ground before it finally stilled. 

And before their eyes, the creature turned into the form of a man. Naked as a newborn, the man laid with his unseeing eyes open and Geralt’s steel sword through his chest. 

Dead.

------

You wanted to scream again, but you felt as if your throat was raw. On the floor was Abalon, the man who had imprisoned you. He was dead, or very nearly so. His creature had crashed upstairs in such a rush that you had screamed out in terror, always unsure what would happen if the creature could not be contained. 

But you needn’t worry this night. Behind him had been someone else. You barely recognized the emblem that hung from a chain around his neck, but it was familiar enough for you to believe he was a Witcher. It explained the swords, explained why he had chased the creature into the abandoned fort building.

Only monster hunters ever dared to come after the creature. And only a master monster hunter of Witcher kind would have been able to kill the creature.

Abalon. It wasn’t just the creature that was dead, but Abalon. You had been tied to the man for too long but sometimes you forgot that he was a man. Most of your days were spent with the creature.

“Are you hurt?”

The tone, impatient and low, told you that the question had been asked before. You had been unable to tear your stare away from the body on the floor but with the voice cutting through the silence, you forced yourself to look away. It made your eyes land on the man in front of you.

A Witcher. You’d never met one. As far as you were aware, most of them were gone. This one didn’t seem old, although the color of his hair might tell another story. An impatient look in his yellow eyes matched his tone.

“No,” you finally forced out once you realized he was still waiting for an answer from you.

You weren’t hurt. The creature scared you, often came close, but you were protected.

That thought made you gasp. You looked down at your hand and found that the cuff of the chain was still there. You followed the length of chain, counting each of the twenty eight links, but it wasn’t tied to the sword that had been struck into the stone floor. You lifted the chain in amazement.

“I’m free?”

Could it be? You were finally free, finally…

The Witcher reached out, obviously unsure why you were chained to nothing. The moment his fingers came in contact with the chain, you felt it tug you forward. The force of the magic sent you almost barreling into the man, the chain clattering to the ground. 

“What the fuck?”

You thought his incredulity came from the sudden force of you bumping into him. When you turned to apologize, you caught sight of the real cause.

The other end of the chain which had been attached to a sword for as long as you had been imprisoned was now attached to the Witcher’s wrist. It had an identical cuff to the one you wore, only larger to encompass the larger wrist. 

“No,” you breathed as you tried to step away. The chain only let you get a few feet before it was pulled taut. “No, please no, not again.”

You turned to the body of Abalon, obviously dead with as much blood had drained onto the stone beneath him. You nearly dragged the Witcher behind you as you marched to the body. There you kicked at his body with all of the fury that had built in your chest over the last year.

“Release me you monster, release me. Let me go!”

Contrary to your words, arms wrapped around you and pulled you away from the body. You were set down on the ground and spun around until you met the eyes of the man who had almost saved you.

“Explain this. Now.”

The gruff voice sent a thread of fear through you. When he released you, you stepped back as far as the chain would allow.

It wasn’t enough room if anyone asked you.

“Abalon is—was a mage. He’d been cursed to spend most of his life as the creature that you slayed, wreaking havoc and terror on any person or creature that he came across. He found a way to bewitch a special chain that tied him to a human which in turn is all that kept him human when he was in the creature’s form.”

You pointed to the sword that had been your tether for a year.

“That was his sword. The chain tied me to the sword in an effort to tie our lives together. It must not have worked because he is dead but I am not.”

You wanted to laugh. He had failed in so many ways and now he wasn’t even here for you to rub it in. He had died and taken away that little joy you could have had. Instead you were faced with the fact that the chain which had kept you there now tied you to the Witcher.

“When I touched it, it latched to me,” he said as he lifted his wrist. 

You watched him inspect the chains, most likely looking for a weakness. It was futile, but you didn’t bother telling him. But when you saw him heft the silver sword he had pointed at you, you shook your head.

“It won’t break the chain,” you said as you held out a hand to stop him. “It would most likely break the sword before it would break the chain.”

He wasn’t the first person to find you. Every time someone found you and tried to save you, either the creature or Abalon in his human form would appear and kill them. Then they would pull out the sword and move you to a new location.

“I refuse to believe that this cannot be undone,” he said as he dropped the chain. “A mage created this chain, then a mage can undo it. And I happen to know a very powerful magic user who can help.”

“Where are they?”

He seemed to do a mental calculation in his head.

“At least three weeks by horseback. We’ll have to move fast.”

That drew you up short. When you didn’t move to follow him, you were dragged a few feet. He noticed your reluctance and turned to face you.

“Unless you have a better idea?”

You didn’t. And you didn’t have anyone here. You weren’t even sure where here was. But the thought of disappearing into the great wide continent with a man—a Witcher—that you didn’t know was more daunting than being kidnapped by a cursed mage.

“My name is Geralt of Rivia,” he offered in a voice that was softer than you could have imagined from a voice so gravely. “You’ll be safe with me. I just want to free us both of this chain.”

Freedom. It had been a long time since you had allowed yourself to dream of freedom. Perhaps the Witcher could help. If anyone could, it would be him, would it not?

“I am Y/N.”

He repeated your name and then bowed his head to you.

“We should go. I left my horse at the tavern and I need to make sure no one has stolen her.”

He stepped on the chest of Abalon and pulled his second sword free. When he turned to put them away, it caused the chain to yank you to the side. 

“That will take some time to get used to,” he said apologetically.

He wasn’t the only one that felt that way. You gathered up the small belongings you had. The longer you stared at the sword, the more it felt like it was staring back at you. Geralt put his hand on the hilt and looked at you.

“Do you want to take it with you?”

“No,” you replied in a soft voice, “no, it should stay with him. It was the belonging that tied me to him. I do not want any connection to him or this place.”

He gave an understanding nod and then gestured for you to head to the stairs first. 

It would be hard to adjust for you. You’d gone from being alone unless the creature was with you and now you were tethered to a man. 

Fate sure had a strange plan for you.

------

The mare’s name was Roach. You had questioned the odd choice, but he hadn’t given any reply. In fact you learned that he didn’t speak much, even when spoken to. You did catch him talking to the horse a few times, but he very rarely spoke to you unless it was absolutely necessary.

Two days after you had left the village Abalon had brought you to, you found yourself praying to be released from the chain sooner than later. If you had to ride for three weeks with a man who thought a grunt was the height of conversation, you would go insane. 

The third night of camping under the stars, you decided to take a page from his book.

“Hello darling Roach,” you said as you rubbed her nose and then her neck. “My father owned a few horses but I was never allowed near them. Horses were for men to deal with and the house was for a woman. The one time he caught me at the stable, he took a switch to me for disobedience. Of course I just made sure not to get caught after that.”

“What are you doing?”

You looked over your shoulder to where Geralt was preparing a trap to catch dinner. Your arm was stretched behind you to give him room to do what he needed, but it meant you were twisted uncomfortably to accommodate him. As always.

“You have shown no interest in speaking to me so I am making do. Since I have been locked away and unable to speak to anyone, I suppose you could say I need a little social interaction. And you’re about as social as a rock stuck in the river.”

The man stared at you for a long moment before he gave a nod.

“I’m not used to traveling with someone.”

You sighed and moved away from Roach. It was only a few feet to where he sat so you lowered yourself onto a stump near him.

“I know that this is an inconvenience for you Geralt, but I can promise it isn’t a field of lilies for me. I have been held prisoner at the whim of a madman who shared his personality with a creature that struck fear in the hearts of knights and villagers alike. I’m just asking for a little conversation. So that I’m not stuck with my thoughts forever more.”

Something of your spiel must have gotten through to him because he gave another nod, this one more purposeful. 

“I shall make an effort. Since you have suffered enough. I cannot promise to be the best conversationalist.”

You smiled but hid it by turning your face into your shoulder away from him.

“I would not count you amongst the bards and storytellers.”

He groaned as he finished up the trap.

“Don’t mention bards. There’s one I am currently avoiding and I believe he might appear as if called if you speak of them.”

This time you didn’t hide your smile, but only because he had to lead you away so that he could place the trap.

------

A noise startled you awake, but you couldn’t place the source. After a moment in which you tried to fall back to sleep, you heard it again.

Howling.

“Wolves,” Geralt said from beside you where he had set up for the night. “They are moving closer.”

He crouched up and moved to the fire which he immediately doused. Then he went over to Roach, his arm stretched out towards you so that you weren’t pulled behind him.

At least he remembered the chain this time.

“If they attack, I will have to fight them off,” he said as he drew his sword. Then he drew his second one and held it out to you. “Can you wield this?”

“I’m just as likely to stab you as I am to stab a wolf,” you protested even as you took it from him.

He gave you a look and then tilted his head.

“Try not to stab me if possible.”

He guided you back over to your original position after he led Roach closer to the two of you as well. You told yourself that you would be safe as long as you stuck close to Roach. He hadn’t let anything happen to her during their travels together.

“Fuck,” he whispered a while later. “They are headed this way.”

You hadn’t heard any more howls, but a Witcher’s sight and hearing was more advanced than a human’s. He shifted his weight and swung his sword. 

He was going to have to literally fight with one arm behind his back. Fear and anticipation clawed their way up your spine as you waited with bated breath.

The first wolf lunged into the clearing and went straight for Geralt. He swung his sword and caught it in the face. You turned your head so as not to see the creature die. 

Next it was two wolves. One launched closer to you and Roach while the other went for Geralt. You raised your sword but felt yourself tugged closer to Geralt as he swung out at his wolf.

There was no way to defend from both sides. If you didn’t act, Roach would be attacked. You raised the sword above your head and tossed it with a yell.

The sword embedded itself into the wolf and it fell motionless on the floor of the forest. You turned away just in time to see Geralt’s surprised face, his wolf dead as well.

“I might have acted before I thought it through,” you said belatedly.

“It worked,” he said with a shrug. He edged you closer to Roach, his sword still up. “The others have run off at least. Maybe your war cry scared them off.”

You huffed out a laugh, but it was humorless. No, you were too busy trying to still your shaking hands.

“Come here.”

Geralt led you back to the tree that he had been leaned against before. He propped you up against it before he reached over to the pack where he kept a flask. He passed it to you with a pointed look when you tried to turn it down.

“It’s adrenaline. It’ll pass and you’ll have a hell of a crash.”

Wasn’t that something to look forward to. You rubbed your hands on the skirt of your dress, your eyes unable to leave the wolf that you had killed.

“Those unaccustomed to danger and violence often have a hard time–”

“Need I remind you that I was the prisoner of a murderous creature? I’ve seen enough violence and death, been in danger often enough. This is just the first time it has been at my own hands.”

There was a long beat of silence. Of course the Witcher wouldn’t understand what you were feeling. It was his job to kill, what he was trained for. You on the other hand? You had been raised to take care of a farm and a household. You’d killed mice or pests that would come into the house or be in the garden, but never something like this.

“You protected yourself. That is not something to feel shame for.”

His hand came out and covered yours. You stared at the bruised knuckles of his large hands. He was trying to comfort you and while your mind still reeled, you decided to let him.

“Technically I think I was protecting Roach,” you said with a grin as you looked over at the horse who snorted in thanks.

“Then you have my gratitude. I wouldn’t want to have to find a new Roach during this adventure of ours.”

That made you turn around in surprise.

“A new Roach?”

He shrugged as he moved to lean against the tree with you. There was barely a foot of space between the two of you and his hand still covered yours on your lap.

“I name all of my horses Roach.”

You were very glad you hadn’t known that before the wolves had attacked.

------

The room was tiny, but it was a bed rather than a bedroll on the forest floor. You had sighed happily when you’d seen the room, but then the reminder of the chain on your wrist came as he moved to put his pack down and your arm was tugged.

You would both have to sleep on the bed. Together. You hadn’t slept in the bed with a man before. The suitors you’d had before you were kidnapped had all been kind but chivalrous. And terrified of your father.

Geralt paused in the room and looked at you. You thought perhaps he had just realized the same thing you had, but it appeared that he had already taken that into consideration. He just hadn’t considered your reaction.

“I can sleep on the floor,” he said with a tilt to his head as if he was trying to figure out how to work it. “I’ll just have my arm on the bed.”

He had already given you his bedroll during the trek. You didn’t want to make him suffer more.

“No, we can share the bed. I just… was wondering how we will have any privacy to… bathe.”

It was a lie, but as you said it, that worry became more pressing than the bed. You had a layer of dirt and grime so thick on your skin that you were probably unrecognizable even to your own eyes. Geralt didn’t look much better.

“I can hang the blanket. It won’t be much, but it’ll provide some privacy.”

It would have to do. 

After he found a way to hang the blanket from the ceiling, he helped you fill the basin with the hot water. Then he stepped on the other side of the blanket to give you your privacy.

You had a lot of practice changing with the chain so you could slide the sleeve of your dress through the cuff. As you took off the rest of your outfit, you wondered if Geralt would have a hard time undressing.

That was a dangerous path for your thoughts. You could admit that your travel companion was a handsome man. More than that, he was… appealing. The strength in him was evident not just in his muscles but in the way he spoke and carried himself. He was certain and sure of himself. He was worldly and experienced.

You had lived on the farm most of your life. When Abalon had come to you, you’d almost been inclined to take his offer of running away with him. He was a mysterious man, old enough to be your father but not hideous. Instead you picked the farm and the life you had once regretted. 

He took you that night. You weren’t sure how he did it, but he stole you away in the middle of the night. After a life on the farm, you spent a year chained and in squalor.

Now you were in a wash basin in a seedy inn with a Witcher on the other side of your chain. A very manly Witcher with eyes that were intense and yet kind, a mouth that could smile and snarl. He was the duality of man, sword in hand to defend and attack at the same time.

You felt safe with him. 

After your bath, you quickly dried off. Then you grabbed your clothes and changed into the cleaner of your dresses. It fit you better than the first dress had. You hated that you wondered what Geralt would think of you in it, but you couldn’t help yourself.

Would he find you appealing? Would he be taken by the way the color complimented your skin and hair? Or the way the blouse was a little lower than the other had been? Would he long to touch you and feel your skin?

You felt foolish just for thinking it.

Dry and clothed, you stepped around the blanket. Geralt cleared his throat and looked away from his sword which had been in his lap. He gave you a nod and then set about preparing his bath. After your water was gotten rid of and new hot water replaced it, it was your turn to sit and wait while he bathed.

You listened to him struggle, the chain tugging on your hand as he fought with his armor. You winced at a particularly hard tug before you cleared your throat.

“Can I help?”

There was silence before he begrudgingly pulled back the blanket. You gave him a soft smile before you went to work on the armor. It took some maneuvering with chain, but you finally got it off by untying one of the supports. Without thinking, you went to work on removing his shirt as well.

He had frozen at first and then helped you remove the article of clothing. Once more you were able to get it off through the cuff, barely since his wrist was larger, but the cuff had magically fit his wrist the same as it had fit yours. Once the shirt was off, you turned to say something but your voice caught in your throat.

There was a lot of chest on display in front of you. A wide chest covered in hair and scars. Your eyes traveled downwards to trace the line of hair and—

“I’ll just…” He pulled the blanket back between the two of you and you slumped into the chair.

You’d just ogled the poor man. And if you had any pretense about his feelings towards you, that cleared it up. He hadn’t seemed interested in the least. You were just an inconvenience, something tied to him that he wanted rid of.

You were a wart to be lanced off at the earliest convenience.

As he rose from the basin, you realized that you could almost clearly make out his form through the blanket. The candles and fire on the other side made a silhouette. It gave you more than enough of a view of his body that you immediately felt heat fill your cheeks and your stomach. You turned your head but that gave you a view of the bed that the two of you would share shortly. Instead you turned to stare at the floor.

Had he been able to see you through the blanket? But of course even if he had been able to, he wouldn’t have wanted to look. His reaction when you had been looking at him told you that well enough.

He got out of the water and dried off with a towel. You raised your arm to give him some more slack on the chain as he got dressed. You knew when he got to his shirt once more because he fumbled with it a bit.

“You have to feed it slowly through the cuff,” you explained.

“I tried,” he gritted back.

After the respectful rejection from before, you didn’t want to offer your help, but the other option was that he just didn’t wear a shirt for the next week and a half. While the thought wasn’t too distasteful to imagine, you knew that it wasn’t possible.

“Here, let me,” you said as you stood up.

The blanket pulled back and a shirt was handed over. You focused on what you were doing instead of the slightly damp chest in front of you. You wouldn’t mortify him or humiliate yourself further by staring again. You finished the task and stepped back so that he could pull the shirt on the rest of the way. He left it untucked. Then he set about emptying the tub once more.

Afterwards all that was left was to go to sleep. You went about getting the bed ready in an effort to ignore the tension in the room. Once there was nothing left to do besides get in bed, you blew out the candle on your side and curled up as best you could. 

Geralt got into his side after blowing out his own candle. He settled in on his side facing you but made sure there was enough room between the two of you so that you weren’t touching. 

Your eyes were closed so you barely lifted them. It meant that you could peer through your eyelashes at the man in the bed with you.

His free arm was tucked under his head. His other arm was on his side, the chain stretched between the two of you. His eyes were closed, his mouth lax. His hair was wet and hung over his forehead.

You longed to reach out and push the hair off of his forehead, but you kept your hands to yourself. You knew that his yellow eyes would pierce into your soul if his eyes opened and you were too tired to hide all of your secrets.

Instead you closed your eyes fully and let yourself fall asleep.

------

“Not much further,” Geralt promised as he helped you onto Roach in front of him. “Another few days.”

You nodded but didn’t say anything. As you drew closer to your destination, you found yourself dreading what help his mage friend could provide. If they could sever the chain that tied you to Geralt, then you would likely never see the Witcher again. 

He had mentioned that he would help you get home, but after that? He would disappear. You would be a strange hazy time in his long memory, but for you he would be a massive hole you would never be able to fill.

Sometime between him pointing his sword to your throat and waking up with him a mere few inches from your face in the bed of that inn, you had fallen in love. It was a strange feeling, but you knew that that’s what it was. A love that would never be replaced, never be forgotten. 

You were already coming up with excuses to give to your parents on why you would never marry. Not one of them included the fact that no one would be able to compete with the Witcher who had stolen your heart.

Damn the chain on your wrist. You had hated it with a passion in your year with Abalon, but this was somehow worse. You’d take a million years with that creature if it meant your heart wouldn’t be broken.

“Get down!”

You were pulled off of Roach and slammed into the ground, rocks and twigs pressed into your back with Geralt above you. There was a loud scream nearby and the whizzing of arrows overhead.

“Bandits!”

Roach had run ahead, to safety hopefully, but Geralt had had the mind to grab a sword before he pulled you from the horse. You stood with him and kept close, as he had told you to do if something like this happened. He kept you at his back as the bandits came crashing out of the trees.

His sword clashed with theirs and you danced to stay behind him but out of reach of the other weapons. If the bandits were surprised to see a Witcher with a woman chained to him, they didn’t show it. Instead they hacked as if they were desperate to kill him. Which was probably because he had already slaughtered two of their men.

You stepped over a severed arm in your struggle to stay behind him. The thought to bend down and pick up the sword came to you, but you didn’t get the chance to try it. There was a sudden piercing pain in your shoulder that shocked a yell from you.

Geralt spun and saw what had caused the yell before you did. There was a short arrow sticking out from your shoulder. When you looked back up, you caught the surprised look of the man with the crossbow as his head flew from his shoulders.

Two more bandits were cut down in the blink of an eye. Then hands were on your face and probing gently at your shoulder.

“Can you hear me?”

“I was shot in the shoulder, not the ear,” you said back with a wince as he tugged on the bolt.

“I’ll have to cut it out.”

You felt a little dizzy at the thought. He put two fingers to his lips and whistled loud before he started to guide you in the direction Roach had run off. 

“Don’t we need to, I don’t know, pilfer their bodies?”

He gave you a look before he turned to face where Roach had appeared in the trees.

“Let’s get that out of your shoulder before we rob the dead.”

------

You held Geralt’s flask cradled in your arm like a baby. He had cut the bolt from your arm and wrapped it. Then he had handed you his flask to help with the pain. The potion he had given you to aid in the healing had tasted burnt, but you had to admit that your arm didn’t hurt as much as it should have.

Or maybe that was the flask.

You were in front of him on the horse once more. His arms around you for support, you felt like you could drift off to sleep. The rocking of the horse’s movements were more relaxing than you could remember them being. And the heat of him behind you made you even more sleepy.

“We’ll stop here for the night,” he said as the horse stopped near a large mound of earth that sprung up from the ground like it was made for people to sleep next to.

Maybe it was.

He got off of Roach first. You watched as he tied off the reins to a tree before he reached up and grabbed your hips. He tugged you over and you swung your leg over to help him. With your injured arm and his flask, you couldn’t brace yourself on his shoulders the way you usually did. It meant that he had full control of you. He set you down on your feet, but not before you basically slid down the front of his body. 

Chest to chest, you peered up at him from under your lashes. The alcohol and adrenaline from the fight fought in your mind to distract you, but you refused to look away from his eyes. They seemed to glow in the dim light of the forest.

With the courage of the drink, you leaned up on your tiptoes and pressed your mouth to his. It was a quick, chaste press of lips. You meant it to be a thank you for saving you, but you knew that there was another reason for you to do it.

You wanted to feel it for just one moment. To feel his lips against yours and to pretend that he meant for it to happen. 

You pulled back and gave him a shaky grin. Suddenly more sober than you had been, you turned away from him and started to walk as far away as the chain would allow you. You didn’t even get that far before you were spun back around to him.

His mouth came down on yours a lot less gently. Before you could react, he pulled back and stared at you in surprise. As if he wasn’t the one that had kissed you that time.

“That was… an accident,” you stated more than asked, giving him a way out. 

“Yes,” he agreed, his eyes never leaving yours.

“A bad idea,” you said with a nod of your head as if that settled that.

“Yes,” he agreed again.

Your chest felt like it couldn’t expand enough for your lungs. Your breath raced in you as you stared up at him.

“Do you… regret it?”

You waited for him to say yes for the third time.

“No,” he said simply before he wrapped a hand around the back of your neck and pulled you in for another kiss. 

This one was more than the others had been. This time both of you moved together, his lips moving against yours deliciously. When his tongue slid against yours, you couldn’t help but moan. 

You believed wholeheartedly that he would have laid you down in the dirt and had you right then and there if you hadn’t gasped in pain when you tried to raise your arm. Instead he pulled away and immediately went about checking the wound on your shoulder. 

“I’ll get a fire started,” he said as he stepped back from you. 

His eyes stayed on your face until you nodded. He couldn’t go far but it put a few feet of space between the two of you.

Not for the first time, you wished the chain was longer. This time it was for a different reason. You needed space to clear your head. He had said he didn’t regret that kiss, had initiated another one, but could that mean more? Or was it simply that the two of you had traveled together for almost three weeks and he wanted that release?

You closed your eyes for a long moment, but you couldn’t dwell in your thoughts. Geralt was nearby, but he acted as if the kiss hadn’t happened. You took a page from his book once more and followed suit.

At least you would have that memory to get you through life when he was gone from you forever.

------

The village reminded you of the one Geralt had found you in. There wasn’t a collapsed fort, but there were a lot of buildings that were vacant. He directed Roach through the streets until he came across a building that looked like it was for an apothecary. 

“Here we are,” he said as he got off the horse. 

Like the dozens of times before, he helped you off Roach with his hands on your hips. And like every time since the kiss, you found yourself unable to breathe as your eyes caught his. He gave a quick nod and then ushered you around Roach who he tied to a post before he led you into the storefront.

It was empty of patrons at least. You followed him towards the back where you could smell burning herbs and incense. He pulled back a beaded curtain and was about to usher you in when he froze.

“Yen,” he breathed out quietly. 

You didn’t need to be a mind reader to know what that meant. Whoever this Yen was, he hadn’t expected her to be here. And there was something between the two of them.

Two women came into view and you realized why he had never been interested in you. Whichever one was Yen, it didn’t matter. They were both beauties. One had black hair and the most vivid purple eyes. The other had curly brown hair and a smile that put you at ease even though your heart was thundering in your chest.

“What brings Geralt of Rivia to my corner of the world?” The one with the smile seemed to ignore the tension in the room as she looked at Geralt and then to you. “And why do you have this poor girl chained to your wrist?”

He cleared his throat and stepped into the room. You wished to stay on the other side of the beaded curtain, but you followed him into the room. It was obvious now that Yen was the black haired beauty who was staring at Geralt as if she hadn’t seen him in years. And Geralt was having trouble not looking at her.

“A curse. The chain was cursed and held her prisoner by a mage. When I tried to remove it, it transferred to me. We need help removing the curse so that we can be free.”

Free of each other. It’s what you wanted as well, especially right then. You could hear your heart breaking into a million pieces the longer you stood in the presence of the lovers.

“Let me see,” Yen said as she stepped up with the other woman at her side. 

They both reached out for the chain at the same time. The other woman was closer to you so she gave you another smile before she inspected the chain. Your eyes strayed over to where Yen was inspecting the chain close to Geralt’s wrist, but she didn’t touch him.

“I’m Triss Marigold, by the way,” the woman said as she continued to get a feel for the curse on the chain. “Geralt has been remiss in introducing us.”

You cleared your throat as you looked down at the chain yourself.

“Y/N Y/L/N from Lanton. I was held prisoner for a year by a mage of the name Abalon as he was possessed by a fearsome creature and needed a human to help him return to his human side. I believe the spell did not work the way he intended.”

He had continued to turn into the creature and you hadn’t died when he had. 

“It’s complicated spellwork,” Yen said as she felt over the chain links and then inspected the cuff around Geralt’s wrist. “I’m Yennefer of Vengerberg. Triss and I are both skilled with magic, but it might take a while for us to figure out how to break this curse.”

So you would be forced to deal with Geralt and Yen in the same room for longer. You gave a tight smile and then looked away once more. Your eyes met Triss’s and you could only hope that she didn’t see the pain and longing in your eyes.

“Let’s get these two something to eat before we start to try to unravel the spellwork. They both look exhausted. You can tell us more of your adventure as we eat.”

You would rather not, but you refused to be so rude as to say that. Instead you let them guide you and Geralt into a room that looked like some cross between a workplace and a kitchen.

“I didn’t realize you were only there for a year,” Geralt said lowly as the two women spoke in hushed whispers about the chain.

You were surprised by that. Surely you had mentioned it? But perhaps you had not.

“He kidnapped me from my family’s farm a little over a year before you arrived. I suppose it’s possible I did not mention it.”

He opened his mouth to say something else but Triss interrupted to put food down in front of you both.

“We have a plan to undo the curse. We’ll get some food in you both and then we’ll start.”

She busied herself in the other half of the room, gathering herbs and vials of things you couldn’t begin to name. While she did that, you caught sight of Yen sitting down beside Geralt. Their words were whispered between the two of them and you did your best to distance yourself so as to give them privacy.

When Triss put a drink down in front of you, you caught the sympathetic look on her face. She had noticed your broken heart but was at least kind enough not to mention it in front of them.

You could be thankful for that at least.

------

Twenty eight links separated you and Geralt. Triss and Yen moved around the two of you, incense burning in the corners of the room as they muttered words in Elder that you didn’t understand. Both of them had energy burning around them as they made opposing circles, intersecting in front and behind you and Geralt.

For his part, Geralt looked uneasy with the magic being performed. He also did not like having them at his back, but it couldn’t be helped. 

The chain felt heavy between the two of you, but it might have just been your imagination. The longer you stood there though, the heavier it felt. You shifted your weight to accommodate, but it felt like it would drag you through the floor.

“I feel it too,” he mumbled as you gripped your wrist with your free hand to try to hold it up. “The magic is making the chains too heavy. I don’t think it’s working.”

You opened your mouth to agree, but you couldn’t stand any longer. You tumbled onto your knees and let your arm rest on the floor, the weight finally released. Geralt knelt down beside you, his own arm limp at his side. 

“Stop,” he shouted over the din in the room, like rushing air around you both, “it’s not working. Something is wrong!”

“The links are bound to you both,” Triss shouted back as she moved her hands, magic pouring over her and into the air. 

Bound to you? It made no sense. You looked down at the chains and then over at Geralt. He was staring at you as well. Wind was whipping around the two of you so quickly that his hair was flying in front of his face. You wanted to say something, but you didn’t have the words. Instead you reached out with your unchained hand, palm up.

His unchained hand wrapped around yours. The moment the contact was made, a bright light burst from between the two of you. Once the light receded, you noticed that the wind had stopped as well.

Your other arm felt lighter. You looked down and noticed that there wasn’t a chain around your wrist anymore. It had been there for over a year, but it was gone. You were free.

Finally free.

“It worked,” you breathed as you looked up and met Geralt’s eyes.

He looked at you in surprise. He mouthed something but you didn’t catch it before you were being pulled up off the floor. Triss looked exhausted but also happy as she wrapped her arms around you.

“I’m so glad that it worked,” she said as she held you.

You looked over her shoulder and saw that Yen held a hand out to Geralt to help him up. She said something to him which earned a nod, a very serious look on his face. When he turned to look at you, you made sure that you were focused on Triss and not the two of them.

“We should celebrate. Drinks at the tavern?”

It was agreed on by everyone. Tiredly you followed them out of the store and down the street to a tavern. Drinks were purchased for the four of you. Geralt seemed to stay close to you, out of habit from the chain you figured. Him and Yen were talking about someone named Jaskier and a misadventure they had shared. Triss laughed as she listened, although it was also obvious that she had heard the story before.

After a little while of happy conversation, you excused yourself for a moment. Outside you quickly made your way up the street and back to the apothecary store. Out front you rubbed Roach’s nose as you grabbed the few belongings Geralt had tied to the saddle.

Then you set off to find someone that was heading out of town. You struck gold with a man who was delivering vegetables out of the village. 

“I need to get to Lanton. I don’t expect you to take me that far, I’ll take a ride as far as you’ll take me.”

He looked you over, but it wasn’t in a lascivious way. Instead it felt more like a grandfatherly concern.

“I can’t take you to Lanton, but I can take you to Vonson’s Landing. Should be someone who can get you home from there,” he said expectantly.

Vonson’s Landing wasn’t far from your home at all. If it was morning when you got there, you might could even walk home. 

“I don’t have anything to pay you with,” you explained as he held his hand out to you.

“I don’t want your money child, give me your hand,” he said with a laugh.

You offered him your hand and let him pull you onto the wagon. He smiled and patted your leg as you got comfortable on the bench beside him.

“Here we go,” he said as he cracked the reins to get the horses to move.

You looked over your shoulder to say goodbye to Roach, but you caught a flash of white hair. He wasn’t looking at you so you let yourself have one last look. His hair still looked a little windswept, but it worked for him. You weren’t sure there was a look that was bad on him.

As the wagon started to pull around the bend where your view would be obscured, you could have sworn that he turned and looked right at you.

And then you were gone.

------

There was a scar on your wrist. You’d noticed it halfway to Vonson’s Landing, a strip of skin that was a different shade and texture that circled your entire wrist. It must have been from the cuff. You’d worn it for over a year so it made sense that it left a mark.

When you made it to Lanton, you were surprised to see that it hadn’t changed one bit. Your family’s farm was on the outskirts, so you didn’t have to go far before you were on familiar land. And as you approached the house, you felt a familiar curl of anxiety in your chest.

It had been a year. Did your parents look for you or did they assume you had run away? Were you missed? Would they be happy to see you?

The door opened and your mother came out to beat a rug. She stopped as she spotted someone in the yard. And then, as she recognized you, she dropped the rug and came running. Tears streamed down her face as she wrapped you up in her arms, thanking the sky above that you had come home to her.

Even your father was happy to see you when he came up from the farm. He had fallen to his knees and wrapped his arms around you and your mother, held you both close.

You were home. And your life wouldn’t be the same, but it would be yours. Things with Abalon were in the past. Things with Geralt were in the past.

You were free.

------

“You rode for three weeks chained to a… a Witcher?” 

Your mother sounded like you had just told her you had become an elephant tamer in the year you were gone. Your parents had taken the story of your imprisonment as well as they could, but it seemed they were far less accepting of your time with Geralt.

The humor wasn’t lost on you.

“He was a good man,” you promised as you went to work on the vegetables on the table. “He protected me. He… he was chivalrous and gentle. I don’t understand why so many people are wary of Witchers, but he was more kind than most people are.”

You tried not to think about the kiss that never should have happened. You tried not to think about the silhouette of his nude body coming out of the bath. 

You tried not to think about that last glimpse of him as you left.

“Then I will be grateful to him for taking care of my girl,” she said as she covered your hand. “As long as you are safe and happy, that is all that matters to me.”

You were safe. Your father had reinforced the windows even though you explained that Abalon was dead.

Happy was another thing entirely. You were glad to be home, to not be chained to that sword anymore. But every time you thought about that chain, you thought about Geralt. The small smile when you said something amusing. The way he was always so careful with you. His hands on your face when you were hit with the crossbow bolt. How gentle he was when he had to cut it from your shoulder.

“Y/N?”

You heard your father’s voice from outside. The first call was inquisitive, the second demanding. You and your mother headed out into the yard.

A horse and rider were coming up the way. At first you weren’t sure why your father had called for you, but then you recognized the rider.

You should have recognized him immediately, but you had convinced yourself that it wasn’t possible. There was no way that it was Geralt of Rivia riding up the same path you had walked every day of your life. 

That white hair could belong to… well, not anyone, but other people. But there was no mistaking his build. And no mistaking Roach.

“Oh,” you breathed, your hand coming to wrap around your wrist as you looked away from Geralt and at your concerned parents. “Perhaps he just wanted to make sure I made it home safely?”

Your parents stayed flocked to you as Geralt finally approached close enough to dismount. He gave Roach a friendly pat before he turned to face the three of you. He didn’t wear his armor or his swords, but they were visible on the horse.

And there was no mistaking the strength and capability in that man. Even without his Witcher emblem hung around his neck, you felt like anyone would know there was more to him.

“Geralt,” you greeted, unsure what else to do.

“Y/N.”

Had he always said your name like that? In a husky voice that sounded more like a sigh than anything else. You cleared your throat and looked over at your parents. If they noticed anything was amiss, they didn’t show it.

“Mother, father, this is Geralt. Geralt, these are my parents, Va–”

“I’m not here for them. I came here for you.”

You swallowed the rest of your introductions. You watched your father move to stand beside you, his way of protecting you. But your mother simply raised a hand to cover her mouth as she watched it all unfold.

“To see if I made it home safely?”

It was a last ditch effort, the only other reason you could think that he would have come all this way. And it had only been a few days so he must have headed this way not long after you had left. 

Why had he come?

He took a step forward and looked between your parents. When they didn’t move, he looked at you. Slowly he raised the hand that had been chained to you, palm up. He didn’t beckon you forward, didn’t reach out to grab you. He simply held his hand palm up and waited.

Without hesitation, you stepped around your father and went to stand in front of Geralt. Your hand moved to press gently against his. There was no burst of light as there had been the last time you touched him, but it felt the same. The breath was knocked from your lungs and you felt like the scenery was brighter.

“The links were bound to us,” he said in a low voice that echoed into your chest. “I was meant to follow that monster to you, to touch the chain and be bound to you. It was written into the fates and we stepped into the parts we were meant to play.”

You looked down at your clasped hands. The ring around your wrist matched perfectly with the ring that was around Geralt’s. He had only been in the cuff for a few weeks. It wasn’t possible that the scar had come from being there over time.

“I never put much faith in destiny or fate, but there are some things you cannot deny. I cannot deny that I felt drawn to you the moment I saw you in that room. I cannot deny that I felt protective of you. I cannot deny that I wanted you that night I saw you undress for a bath. I cannot deny that I was scared when you were hurt. I cannot deny that I wanted to kiss you, wanted more. And I cannot deny that it felt like my soul had been ripped from me when I saw you on that wagon leaving me.”

The million pieces that your heart had shattered into had come back together so brilliantly that you were sure all of the continent could see how radiant it was. Your hand in Geralt’s, you felt like everything had fallen into place in a way you never expected. You never expected to fall in love with a Witcher. You never expected him to fall for you as well.

“Geralt,” you whispered as you stepped closer to him, tears in your eyes as you beamed up at him, “the only destiny I believe in is the one that brought me to you.”

His smile was there and gone in a second. No, not gone, just pressed against your lips so that you couldn’t see it anymore. He tasted like golden sunshine and you just wanted to drink him in. You wanted to climb into his arms and never leave, if it was possible. 

A throat cleared behind you and both of you separated and turned to face your parents. Your mother was smiling behind her hand and your father looked reluctantly pleased. 

“I suppose we can count ourselves fortunate to have a Witcher in the family,” your father said with a shake of his head as if he couldn’t believe the words coming from his lips.

Geralt stiffened at your side. You were worried until you met his eyes and saw nothing but happiness there. Happiness and love. 

You pressed another kiss to his lips and then leaned your forehead against his cheek.

“You’re bound to me. And I to you,” you whispered as you held on to him tighter.

“Always,” he replied as he pressed a kiss to your forehead.

X

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[cinebration]

Cordial (Napoleon Solo x Reader) [Part 8]

The meeting with the clients.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Epilogue

Tagged: @ly–canthrope​, @maan24​, @eefjedegraaf​, @omgkatinka​, @illbegoinhome, @tiffanypooh

Warnings: none

Gif Source: dianahprince

Though his face remained calm and impassive, Solo couldn’t stop the mass of emotions roiling within himself. He hadn’t even grimaced as he had pulled on the brown suit, hadn’t even noticed its low-quality texture and not-quite-tailored fit. Preoccupied with the morning’s revelation, he donned the clothes methodically and stepped out into the hallway.

You stood waiting by the elevator, your profile striking even at a distance. Solo couldn’t bring himself to notice it with any sort of pleasure or displeasure. He found himself staring instead, trying to decipher you.

Feeling his gaze, you turned and smiled, the curve of your lips bordering on downright wicked. Something stirred within Solo, but it quickly lost momentum in the face of his overwhelming disbelief and confusion.

The elevator doors slid open, revealing an empty car. Solo followed you inside and pressed the button for the lobby.

The moment the doors slid shut, he turned to you, unable to keep the question from slipping past his lips. “Were any of my other sales fakes?”

Somehow your smile widened. Stepping in front of him, you looked up into his chiseled face. Silence stretched between you as you forced him to stare down at you. The difference in height did little to make him feel taller than you.

Your fingers curling around his tie, you answered, “Yes.”

“Which ones?”

You slowly shifted the tie in your hands, loosening the knot to straighten it.

Solo tried to ignore your ministrations as your fingers danced over the thin fabric of his shirt, feeling the hard muscles beneath it.

“Only three or four of them,” you said, fiddling with the knot further.

“Which is it? Three or four?”

“Six.”

He clenched his jaw. “Which ones?”

“Does it matter? If you had them and the originals in front of you, you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. I’m no van Meegeren.”

Solo seized your hands, stilling them. Leaning down, his breath tickling your lips, he said, an edge to his voice, “I don’t believe you.”

You stared back defiantly. “Yes you do. What’s more…you’re afraid.”

With sudden speed, you yanked the tie’s knot back into place, pressing it hard into his throat. Eyes widening, Solo immediately took a step back, shoving your hands away.

Laughing lightly, you turned to the elevator doors as the car coasted to a stop. “That’s okay. You should be afraid of me. A little, at least.”

The doors slid open, and you sauntered out, leaving him in the car gaping after you. Solo loosened the tie and slowly readjusted it, his thoughts pointed: If she can trick me, what else can she do?

~~

The maître d’ seated you and Solo at a table in a corner, a window to your right. Solo sat across from you, forced either to look at you or the window. He chose the latter, watching the passersby stroll down the street in airy clothing to mitigate the summer heat. His trained eye scanned them for familiar faces, odd looks, and loitering.

All looked normal.

The front desk at the hotel had relayed a message from the buyers: Breakfast instead of lunch.

You had smiled, muttering, “Classic. But at least our breakfast issue is resolved.”

Solo hadn’t cared.

A tall waiter approached the table, bending slightly at the waist in greeting. He remained there, however, mitigating the effect of his height so as to avoid intimidation.

You asked for some water and told him to wait until the other party arrived. Nodding, the waiter excused himself, returning quickly with the glass and disappearing just as quick.

“Six of them?” Solo asked.

You sighed quietly. “Yes. Please tell me you can put that aside during the meeting. You know the importance of a good first impression.”

“Don’t tell me what I know.”

You arched an eyebrow. “Do you want me to keep telling you what you don’t know?”

Clenching his jaw again, Solo glanced back out the window and readjusted his tie again. Though it sat firmly where it belonged, he could still feel the pressure of the too-tight cinching you had done in the elevator. Skin itching beneath his collar, he struggled to shake off his irritation and whatever other pesky emotion he didn’t dare acknowledge that was trying to strangle him.

In the corner of his eye, you straightened suddenly, a congenial smile spreading across your face. Solo turned in his seat to see a couple approaching the table, all fake smiles themselves. Rising to his feet, Solo slid out the chair next to him and offered a smile of his own, his face losing all trace of his frustration, replaced instead with his characteristic charm.

The couple stopped before the table. The man, a dirty blonde with a soft chin, glanced at you. “Ms. Rosales?”

Solo and you exchanged a surreptitious glance. The man’s accent was unquestionably American. Solo glanced at the woman on his arm. Her hair matched his in color, though her blue eyes weren’t quite as dull as his, and a smattering of freckles crossed over the bridge of her nose and down both sides. Solo shifted his smile to his more charming one, his eyes twinkling with mischief.

“Yes,” you answered, your own voice lightly accented with a Hispanic inflection. Even to Solo’s trained ear, it remained vague.

“Wonderful to make your acquaintance,” the man said. “I’m Henry Williamson, and this is my wife, Virginia.”

“Pleased to meet you,” she said, her voice also American.

“Please, take a seat,” Solo said. He held out the chair for Virginia. This had been part of your plan. By having Solo take the initiative, it would force the client to sit beside Rather than across from you, allowing for a quieter conversation as well as preventing him from reading your face properly.

Virginia’s smile softening, she took the proffered seat, Solo taking his place beside her. His smile tightening, Henry sat in the remaining chair and plucked the cloth napkin off his plate, unfolding it with crisp motions.

“You’ll forgive me,” you said, “but I wasn’t expecting Americans.”

Henry chuckled. “Don’t you know? We’re everywhere.”

Virginia laughed. “Henry says you could throw a rock and hit an American.” She glanced aside at Solo. “There’s three of us here at the table, even!”

Solo felt his lips peel back into a wide grin. The woman’s smile was infectious, her laughter light and airy. He found himself arrested by the freckles on her face.

“Given the nature of this transaction,” you continued, “I wonder whether you are spies.”

Henry laughed again, but this time with considerable less mirth. “I would say an American and an Hispanic together could be spies.”

Solo waited for the man’s attention to return to his napkin before shooting you a warning glance. You returned it with a flat look and waved over the waiter. The tall man returned to the table, bowed at the waist, and took down everyone’s orders.

The food arrived promptly. As everyone dug in, small talk, primarily carried by Virginia and Solo, filled the silence.

It wasn’t until the main entree had nearly been finished that you turned to Henry and said, “Shall we talk business?”

“Shouldn’t I be talking to you?” Henry asked, addressing Solo.

“I may be a businessman,” Solo answered suavely, “but this is Sofía’s domain. I’m merely here to facilitate, if necessary.”

Henry frowned, his gaze sliding to his wife before turning back to you. “I am authorized to make a purchase of—”

“Excuse me. You are authorized?” You straightened in your seat. “I take it, then, that you are an intermediary?”

Henry’s frown deepened. “Yes, of course.”

“I was under the impression we were meeting with the buyers.”

“No. Our client doesn’t—”

“This won’t do.” Wiping your lips with a napkin, lipstick smearing, you rose from the table.

Solo immediately stood, following your lead.

“Please inform your client that I will only do business with him directly,” you said crisply.

“I’m sorry, ma’am, but this is how—”

“Notify him that there are other bids already in play. If he wishes to do business, he must appear in person.” You smiled thinly. “Have a nice day.”

You strode for the front doors of the restaurant. Solo blinked and glanced down at Virginia and her husband.

“Apologies,” he said graciously. Retrieving his wallet from his pocket, he placed enough money down to cover the meal and held up a few extra francs. “I recommend the soufflé.”

Grabbing Virginia’s delicate hand, he met her eyes as he pressed his lips to the back of it. “You may reach me at Le Meurice.”

Solo caught up to you on the sidewalk outside. “That was your plan?”

“An improvisation,” you admitted, “but it will work.”

“Sure it will.”

You shot him a look and hailed down a taxi.

Solo caught himself staring at your mouth, the lipstick smeared across it from your hasty wiping. It looked rather alluring to see you disheveled.

He shook the thought from his head.

[kyber-kisses]

Through A Mothers Eyes (Part 3)

Dean Winchester x Reader

Wanna start from the beginning? Here is the masterlist!

Warnings: crack, cursing, idiots to lovers trope (that good shit)

Summary: When Mary meets Deans closest and best friend, she cant help but see the chemistry between them. . .but she might be the only one as well.

A/n: Its back! It took me awhile to motivate myself to write the next chapter, but I did it! I hope you enjoy and feedback is greatly appreciated! (gif made by rainbow-motors)

If Mary thought living in a bunker with her two sons and you was chaotic. . . She was definitely not prepared at all for what game night meant. Not. One. Bit.

It was like a fucking war zone.

Halfway through Jenga she almost expected you and Dean to slap on some war paint, she had never seen such competitive people before in her life.

And then you brought out Uno.

“Fuckin demolish him Cas!” You yelled, hands planted firmly on the table as you watched the angel and hunter slap down colored cards furiously. You, Sam, and Mary had all lost already, resulting in you being Cas’s new hype man.

“Y/N, you’re supposed to be on my side!”

“There are no sides in Uno, Dean!”

“Then why the hell are you cheering on Cas?!” Dean slapped down another card. The two were almost running out of cards to play that it hit the point where Sam had to start shuffling the played cards so they could continue. “As your best friend let me just say; I find that insulting.”

“False. Cas is actually my best friend.” You responded bluntly, raising your hand to connect it with the angels in a loud high five.

Dean paused to narrow his eyes in your direction. “. . . Anyways, as your best friend- I’m telling you, you can’t pick sides.”

“Oh and where pray tell did you get that idea from?”

“The best friend rule book.”

You laughed. “Oh yeah, let’s whip that one out and crack it open, I’d love to read it!” You paused, turning to his mother with a soft smile. “I’m so sorry you have to witness this. He’s just a pain in my ass.”

Resting her chin in her hand, Mary returned the smile, still mildly amused at what was playing out in front of her. “I can tell. But I’m pretty sure he’s a pain in everyone’s butt.”

Deans mouth popped open in shock as his lips momentarily failed at trying to form words. “Now you’re taking her side too?!”

“I mean-“ you paused, flicking your hair over your shoulder. “I am fucking amazing. Plus, your mom just knows who the cooler person is out of the two of us-“

“Oh you little-“ dean growled, rolling up his sleeves after slapping his cards down on the table.

“Is this really necessary?” Cas muttered, eyes still on his cards and clearly trying to plan his next move.

“Oh you fuckin know it.”

“Maybe your mom should just adopt me. I could replace you! I am way more fun!” You laughed, backing up as Dean slowly rose from his seat. “Plus, you’re moms way more cool than you.” You joked, eyes lighting up when you looked at Dean and saw him moving towards you. You maneuvered around the table, the two of you moving back and forth as you tried to dodge Dean, trying to keep the table between you.

“You’re such an asshole!”

“You know it baby.” Shooting him a wink you ducked behind Sam's large frame, using him as a shield.

“Oh no- don’t go bringing me into this.” Sam tried, shaking his head as you gripped his shoulders.

“Just hold him off for me will ya?”

“And what do I get in return?”

“. . . the next time its your turn for a supply run, ill do it.”

A pause. “Deal.”

“Sam!”

The younger Winchester shrugged as he held out his arms, stopping Dean from reaching you. “What? Y/Ns more negotiable that you are.”

You let out a cackle before standing on your top toes to press a firm kiss to Sams cheek. “Thanks Samantha!”

You took off down the hallway before Dean could even attempt to move Sam. The younger Winchester continuing to block his brother as he tried to move past him. After a moment Dean gave up, falling back into his seat. “Alright, fine. I admit defeat. . .you can put your arms down..”

“If I do are you gonna go kill her?”

“. . . Maybe.”

“Dean!” Mary hissed, shaking her head at her sons antics.

“What? She’s a pain in the ass!”

Mary only shook her head again. That was until Cas spoke up again. “Am I supposed to say Uno?”

*. *. *. *. *. *.

The rest of the night became much calmer after that, you and Dean were back to your usual shenanigans and held up in the Dean cave watching some old western, Sam had headed off to bed because apparently you and Dean “drain his energy” Or whatever. Cas was for some reason still up cataloging some of the bunkers lore. As for mother Winchester, she found herself seated at the kitchen table, reading a book you had lent her a little over a week ago.

Mary almost didn’t see you walk in at first, with most of the lights still off it was like darkened hallway spit you out. Hands in the pockets of your sweatpants you quietly trudged into the room, pausing at the sight of Mary.

“You liking the book?”

Mary looked up, a small smile gracing her lips at the sight of you. “Yes I am, thank you for lending it to me.”

“No problem. Honestly it was just sitting on my desk collecting dust. I read it and never picked it up again” You admitted with a shrug. Walking past her, you filled your empty glass at the sink before moving back and lowering yourself into the seat across from her. “I’m sorry about earlier. Deans and Is energy can be a little overwhelming at times.”

“You don’t need to apologize. If anything I should be thanking you.” She closed her book, folding her arms over the surface of the table.

“What for?”

Mary let out a sigh. “Even if I haven’t been back for very long, it’s easy to see the effect you have on Dean. He’s happier when you're around, you get him to laugh more than anyone else here.”

“I think you're just seeing his slow decent into insanity.” You chuckled, looking down at your folded hands. “I’m told I have that effect on people.”

“Oh I don’t think that’s true.”

You opened your mouth to answer but stopped when you looked past Mary, eyebrow instantly raising. “What?”

Mary turned in her seat, her eyes finding her oldest son standing in the darkened doorway, your blue blanket wrapped around him. Dean narrowed his eyes at you. “You left me.”

“. . . I’m sorry?”

He stepped down into the kitchen, eyes still glazed over with a slight sleepiness. “It was rude.”

“You were asleep! I didn’t want to wake you up!” You threw your hands in the air, unable to believe the man sinking down into the vacant seat next to you. He yawned, his head falling against your shoulder as he closed his eyes.

“But by your didn’t have to leave me by myself. I woke up and you were gone.”

You rolled your eyes, hand coming up to pat the side of his head. “You poor baby, whatever shall you do now?”

“Mmm haven’t gotten that far yet.”

“Did you really just come in here to fall asleep on me again? Just go to bed Dean.”

“Don’t wanna.” He sighed, wrapping your blanket tighter around him.

“I swear you like a five year old.”

“I am not.”

“You totally are.” You paused. “But seriously Dean, go to bed. I ain’t dragging you down the hallway to your room when you fall asleep on me again.” You gave him another pat before standing up put your now empty glass in the sink, having practically chugged it moments before.

Groaning once more, Dean slowly blinked his eyes open and turned his attention to his mother. “What are you still doing up? I thought you went to bed.”

“Couldn’t sleep, thought I’d stay up and read instead. Y/N lent me a book to read.”

Turning his head to look between you and his mom he shook it in disbelief. “God, I live with a bunch of nerds.”

“Dean you can’t say anything about that. You're like the biggest nerd out of all of us.”

“. . . Shut up. Plus, you're no better. If anything I'm this way because of you.”

“Sure, Jan. You keep telling yourself that.”

Dean paused when he looked back over to his mom, seeing a soft smile on her features. “What?”

“Just the two of you-“

“What about the two of us?” He questioned, sliding the blanket off of his shoulders as he stood up before folding it and handing it back to its rightful owner.

“I just- I think you two would make a cute couple.”

There was a pause as the two of you looked at each other.

“Me? . . .And her?” Dean threw a thumb over his shoulder in your direction.

“Me and Dean?”

Another pause. And then a light laugh was bubbling up from both of your throats- before quickly turning into full bellied laughter. Dean had his hands planted on his knees and your head was thrown back as you grabbed at you gut. The two of you quickly dissolving into fits of hysteria. It went on for a good minute before starting to fizzle out.

Ahaha! Whew-“ Dean chuckled, wiping the tears from his eyes as he stood up properly again. “That- that was good.”

“Oh god-“ you bent over, hands still on your sides. “My gut hurts- I haven’t laughed like that in awhile.” You panted.

“Yeah, thank you for that mom.” Dean patted his mother’s shoulder as he passed. “That just made my entire day.”

Once you had mostly regained your composure, you took a deep breath. “Okay, well as much fun as that was- I’m gonna go to bed. Goodnight Mary, Dean.” Giving gone last nod you stepped into the hallway along with Dean, the two of you connecting your palms in a loud high five before walking off in separate directions.

Meanwhile Mary sat silently at the table, the only thing running through her mind being what the fuck just happened?

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[writerfangirlbooks]

Memories

Castiel x Reader

Prompt: Castiel takes care of you, both fallen angels, after you were cursed and lost your memory.

Word Count: approximately 2150

Credit to gif owner!

"I need you to wake up, Y/N, please." A deep and masculine voice spoke above you.

The world shifted from darkness and opened to blinding lights for a few seconds and repeated for a few times before you were able to focus your view on a person above you. You felt yourself analyzing without thinking about it, sensing the worry from the being next to you. Familiarity filled the room as you worked to sit up, but unable to place a name on... well, anything.

"Wh-" You were unable to finish an out-loud thought.

Your throat felt funny. Scratchy? Maybe that was the correct terminology. You focused on what appeared to be a man next to you. The first thing you took notice of was the color blue. It was the brightness in his wide eyes. Blue. You got flashes and were able to name the views to specific words. Ocean. Sky. Some types of garments called jeans.

"How do you feel?" The voice asked confirming it was the man in the room.

Yes, it was a room you were in. What type of building were you in? You wondered. Descriptions floated across your brain: house, mansion, apartment, store, and many more.

"I feel... dizzy," you decided.

Dizzy was accurate. The earth seemed to be moving around you and when the man's hand moved towards you, there were a few hands shadowing it. You flinched when his warm hand touched your forehead. The last person that touched you had not been so gentle, this you were positive of. His eyebrows creased together. You understood this meant he was concerned.

"I am unable to heal you. I am incredibly sorry, Y/N," the man said, pulling his hand away.

"Y/N?" You questioned.

Talking made it difficult to swallow and your eyes welled with tears. Why on earth would you be crying? You felt no pain. In fact, you felt very little. The man's mouth parted slightly, indicating surprise or shock. He placed a hand in yours and you instinctively intertwined fingers. You gasped, embarrassed, and undid the last action, but left your palms touching. With his left hand, the man reached over to a table beside the bed you were lying in and handed you an uncapped bottle filled with water.

"That is your name. I'm afraid this means you are telling me you no longer know who you are." He paused before quietly asking, "Do you remember who I am?"

You shook your head. His eyes fell downcast. You began to sip the water before the majority of the bottle was gone. You took a ragged breath afterward, already feeling some strength returning. Yawning, you felt able to sit upwards. You held the man's hand tightly for support as you did this. He watched as you did this, seeming to be momentarily at a loss for words.

You stretched forward and set the bottle in its previous spot. Looking around the room, the walls were a calm gray. The closed-door was wooden. There was nothing personal that you noticed. It was simply a bed, the chair the man was sitting in, the bedside table, a closet door, and a door to the hallway. You swallowed a few more times for practice until you felt comfortable to use your voice again.

"I can tell that you are very familiar to me. I feel like I should be able to trust you. I can remember a few events. I have no recollection of who you are. I don't even know my own name," you told him.

The last statement brought the tears back to your eyes. This time it was not because of the physical pain from your body but an emotional sorrow. You didn't understand why that was happening. One thing was clear to you and that was an immense sadness that you could not claim to know who you were or how you knew this person. You felt empty. The understanding of concepts large and small made perfect sense. You were able to picture yourself on a beach, relaxing, but were unable to make out anyone that was next to you. You could smell your favorite coffee and put a name to it. Objects and events were becoming clearer yet names and people remained unknown.

"I-I'm sorry. That must be very difficult to experience. My name is Castiel and yours is Y/N. I would like to assist you with rediscovering yourself. I understand it's only been a few minutes, but have your conditions changed?" He asked.

"I do feel better, physically, at least. Not as weak. Or dizzy," you added.

Castiel nodded and appeared to be pondering a new idea. You mouthed your own name a few times to get used to it. Nothing clicked. You did the same with Castiel. Shaping the word on your lips seemed easier than your own, almost more comfortable. You were positive you had said it a lot. You decided to push your luck and attempt standing. Using his hand for extra strength, you tossed your legs over the side of the bed and wobbly stood up. Castiel stood up with you, moving his other hand to your back for steadiness.

You took a few breaths and blinked back a few more tears, working to control the shaking your body was tempted to let control you. Refusing to let that happen, you pushed your feet forward and moved a few paces. Castiel let you go.

"I can do this," you muttered.

You walked over to the door and successfully made it back. Only somewhat satisfied, you sat back down on the bed. Castiel asked for permission before sitting down on the bed next to you. He pushed the chair away. Wordlessly, you held out your hand and he took it with a kind smile.

"You did great," he assured you. "This will be strange to hear so I ask you to remain calm. Before I propose my idea, I think it is imperative that you know not just who we are, but what we are."

You could not figure out how to process that sentence because of how strange it was.

"That was very vague and I do not understand. I believe I should trust you, so please do not disappoint me. I am as calm as can be given the circumstance," you told him.

Castiel nodded again. He anxiously ran his tongue over his lips. His blue eyes flickered to the right before going back to you. This made you want to reach over to cease his worries, but the unknown was strong enough to convince you his hand in yours was enough for the time being.

"You and I are angels of the Lord. We have been good friends for a very long time, centuries in fact. Not too long ago, there was a Fall, and we became human. During that time, I experienced real love for the first time, and I believe you did too. I became involved in working with some humans that hunted monsters, and you joined me occasionally. About a week ago, there was a messy case that involved a clan of witches... I wasn't fast enough to get to you. You were cursed and rendered unconscious. Our grace, that we possessed as angels, is only available in fragments now, so I hoped I would be able to reinstate your health, but it appears that is not the case. I cannot imagine how much this is to take in, so before you say anything, I am going to offer an idea. Two, actually. I would like to jog your memory using the places we have visited. This can be done broken into increments where I can access your brain, something I have gained access to do recently, and show it to you here. Or we could actually go visit them, which would take quite a bit more time. As angels, we had the ability to simply think of where we wanted to go, and within one blink, we were there. That was one of the many things we no longer can do. I know that this is quite a lot to process, so I understand if you won't have a decision right away."

Castiel spoke to you, slow and sincerely. He believed each and every word he said, which made you want to do the same. What he was asking of you had to be absolutely insane. Go through your brain and access memories you don't remember experiencing or traveling with someone you don't remember knowing, or apparently loving, and reliving these adventures? They were both very exciting and intriguing options while being wild and surprising options.

You waited a few minutes in silence. Castiel's hand remained firmly in yours, patiently waiting. It was shocking how at ease you felt at making this decision quickly. It was simple. After another deep breath, you were able to communicate your answer.

"When do we leave?"

-

After more rest, hydration, and a shower, you felt rejuvenated and prepared to discover who you were. As disappointing as it was that you weren't getting memories back quickly, you felt reassured knowing you weren't going through this alone.

Your first stop was to tell the hunters what the plan was. Well, Castiel was, anyways. He informed them he would be gone for a while and did not know yet when he would return. Castiel admitted to you that he was new to driving and sheepishly said he was not the best. You assured him that was okay with you and that it was probably for the best you did not drive. He smiled at that.

Soon the pair of you had traveled all over, mostly by driving. You experienced trains, planes, and rollercoasters. Your favorite form of transportation was the simplest. It was the two of you walking together.

You were camping nearby a lake and had just bought a new swimsuit. You were surprised by your comfort of the body. Castiel often reminded you that the bodies you inhabited were vessels, not your true form. At some point, they became one and the same when you fell from Heaven. Castiel was in a white shirt and dark swim shorts and some silly looking sandals. At your last stop, the two of you bought a camera, insisting on a way to store the new memories. Although it had only been around a month, nothing new had appeared yet. Sure, certain smells and places reminded you of something from before your curse, but nothing substantial.

"Y/N, do you want to stay on the stand or go in the water?" Castiel asked.

His sunglasses were propped on the top of his head. Rather than using them, Castiel squinted around. You were surprised by how tan his skin had become. Yours had not changed much. You pretended to blame it on still figuring out life once more.

When you stopped staring at the light water with strong waves and turned to Castiel, your brain stopped seeing the man in front of you and saw images from a long time ago. You could tell it was Castiel, though he appeared much different. The two of you were hardworking friends, no longer surrounded by water, but something softer, that you couldn't feel. Clouds... the two of you were in Heaven.

"Castiel..." Your voice trailed off, trying to focus on the present and hold onto the past.

You watched as he moved towards you and gently placed his hands on your shoulders. For a few stressful seconds, you were unable to speak or move. Being an entity in your mind and a weak human was not a good crossover. When one of his hands fell down your arm and stopped at your elbow, you let out a breath of air and stared into the bluest eyes imaginable. There was a time, that you were certain was no more than a couple of years ago, that was the first time a tingle ran up your spine when Castiel touched your arm. You saw him in a nice outfit with combed hair. He was much shyer then but had grown enough courage to finally kiss you. The ghost of his lips on yours remained as you focused back on reality. As profound as these memories were, it was the feelings they brought that was more powerful. This was convincing enough to have your touch his cheek before kissing him slowly.

When the two of you parted, you saw the question forming and shook your head. You had burst of energy from the excitement of having memories once again. You smiled brightly with the first real hope.

"I looked at you and I saw us in Heaven, before the Fall. Then you touched my arm and I was brought forward in so many years to, to our first kiss," you said, somewhat exhilarated.

Castiel returned your smile with a tint of pink in his cheeks. He excitedly hugged you. "That's fantastic. What do you want to do?"

"Let's go into the water. It was only two, but it was still something. We've got a lot more to explore!"

[margoshansons]

Desperate Measures: 2/?

Part Two: Bellamy Blake x Reader

Summary: Unable to sleep, Miller and Y/N celebrate her birthday with some contraband moonshine, Clarke and Finn come back bearing bad news, and things come to a head between Y/N and Bellamy as they search for Jasper.

Warnings: swearing, violence, mild angst, 

Notes: Thank you for all the love! Also, goddamn that gif is beautiful. Based on 1x02 “Earth Skills”

She didn’t sleep at all that night. Instead, Miller snuck her into Monty’s tent, the kid who left with Jasper, he explained. 

“This kid makes the best moonshine I’ve ever tasted.” He explained, scratching at the patchy facial hair that had started to grow in. 

Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at the petty thief. Monty wasn’t even here, probably out trying to get his poor friend laid, but Miller still felt the need to sneak into his tent as if he would get punished for it.

“Isn’t this the Monty you had a crush on in fifth grade?” She asked, coughing down what Miller had now dubbed ‘birthday juice’. 

“Yeah, so?”

Y/N shrugged before taking another gulp, regretting it as the sun began to peek through the opening in the tent. “Ugh, we should get ready before Bellamy starts clanging the pots to get us to work.” She rolled her eyes at the thought of the older leader, annoyance erupting in her stomach as she recalled the events of last night. She pushed herself off the leafy ground, wiping the dirt off her hands as she stood.

“You know he’s not that bad once you get to know him” Miller offered, stuffing the canteen back under Monty’s bed while Y/N shrugged on her jacket. “I knew him a bit before I got arrested, he’s actually a pretty awesome guy.”

She smirked, resisting the urge to roll her eyes, “This is why I love you, Miller.”

“Because I can get you free alcohol and sneak you into places you’re not supposed to?” His eyebrow twitched upward as he smiled. Y/N holstered her makeshift knife in the band of her jeans, patting Miller’s shoulder. “Because you see the best in people, even little shits like Bellamy.”

As the two exited the tent to catch the first earthen sunrise in over ninety-seven years, Miller would not stop trying to defend the older kid. “I just don’t know why you won’t give him a chance. I think you guys would actually have a lot in common if you just talked to him.”

Y/N spun around, trying not to offend one of her best friends, “Look, Nate, I love you but Bellamy insulted my own family and personal life last night, not to mention him and Murphy don’t even care about the progress of this camp. He and I will never get along, now drop it.”

Miller nodded, the two teens watching the black sky fade into soft colors beyond their imagination. Pink, orange, and yellow stretched across the sky until they all mixed together to create the crystalline blue they had dreamed so long about seeing. 

“Now that you’re eighteen, what are you gonna do?” Nate asked, spreading himself out on the grass to watch the sky morph. Y/N joined him, her ponytail pressing against her skull as she thought it over.

“I don’t know.” She confessed, weight lifting off her shoulders as she played with the silver band around her other wrist, “Sinclair had promised me an apprenticeship back on Mecha, guess that’s off the table.”

A chuckle lifted both of them from their tired night. 

Y/N smiled, contemplating the possibilities. “I guess...I’m a free woman. I can do anything. I can do anyone.” She chuckled at her wordplay, Miller suddenly growing silent. She recognized that behavior. He was trying to find the right words to say something.

“What is it?”

“Your dad” Miller asked gingerly. “Do you think he would’ve floated you?”

She inhaled sharply, her mind racing at a thousand miles a minute as she tried to come up with a probable answer. Her gut told her no. Even if they didn’t share blood, she had to believe a part of him hurt when she had been taken away. But then she remembered the cold gaze in his eyes when he had wrapped the handcuffs around her wrists and, like most situations, her head won out. 

“Probably.” She breathed, the words tasting sour in her mouth. “I was a liability, someone who knew the two biggest secrets aboard the Ark. What better way to shut me up then to float me like my mother?”

Silence filled the space between them.

She continued her argument, more to convince herself than the thief beside her.

“Logically it makes sense, and Kane has always been motivated by logic.”

Miller sat up, turning on his side to face her, a regretful look passing through his eyes, “I’m sorry Y/N, I didn’t mean to bring it up. I guess, I just hoped--”

“I know what you meant Miller.” Y/N mirrored his position, placing a hand on his arm, letting him know his mistake was forgiven. “But that man is not my father. Of course, my real dad wasn’t much better.” 

The two friends shared another laugh until a scream ruined the moment between them. They launched to their feet, sprinting back to the clearing just in time to see Wells tackle Murphy to the ground. 

Emotions disappeared behind a steel wall as Y/N approached the two, ready to separate them again. 

“Hey! That’s enough,” She called, struggling against the raw strength of the boys. “HEY! I said that’s enough!”

She ripped the darker-skinned boy off the other delinquent, ready to defend Wells against another tirade of Murphy’s. “What happened?” Wells breathed heavily, a shaky finger pointing at the paler boy. “He was holding Roma over the fire, I tried to stop it and he attacked me.”

A sneer crossed Murphy’s face as he shuffled forward, launching toward Wells. Y/N reached underneath her shirt grasping the makeshift knife and brandishing it as Bellamy pushed Murphy back. 

“Murphy enough!” Bellamy stopped the delinquent, throwing a look of contempt her way. Her chest heaved up and down in an attempt to calm the anger rising in her throat.

“Crazy bitch” she heard Murphy whisper under his breath as Bellamy talked him down. 

She refused to put down the knife. 

Her hand was extended before her, guarding Wells in case Murphy tried to take him down again, which, from the hateful glare in his eyes, he was definitely thinking about. 

“What the hell is going on?” Clarke asked, mouth wide open. Y/N took a mental note of the campers who had returned. 

Four. One missing. 

No food.

Octavia was limping. 

“Murphy attacked Wells” Y/N responded, shoving her knife back into her jeans, trying to figure out what they had seen out there. “Are you okay?” She asked the group of returning prisoners, the group doubling over and panting from the run back. Finn’s eyes held a seriousness she hadn’t seen since he had been arrested. He shook his head.

“What happened to your wristband?” Clarke asked, rushing over to Wells and grasped his wrist. His empty wrist.

Wells shot a dirty look at Bellamy, Y/N followed suit. 

“Ask him”

Clarke strode over, anger increasing with each step as her brow furrowed, jaw clenching. “How many?” Bellamy was silent, cut off by Murphy’s proud: “Twenty-four and counting.” The freshly pummeled delinquent sent a glare toward Y/N as he said that, smiling at their growing statistics. She resisted the urge to tackle him then and there. One, because he had more strength than her, and because Miller’s words from yesterday rang in her head. 

He wasn’t worth it. 

“You idiots!” Clarke spat, “Life support on the Ark is failing!”

The kids began to murmur again as they realized that what Y/N had been saying last night was actually true and they were fighting a losing battle. Hushed tones began to wonder about the possibility of survival.

“Where’s the kid with the goggles?” Wells asked, suddenly realizing the low amount of returning campers. 

“We were attacked, and Jasper was taken.” 

Y/N’s chest constricted, breathing accelerating. Her body grew still, all of her fear carefully hidden behind the mask of stone she wore on her face. Down here fear is death.

“Attacked?” She asked, confusion crossing her face while she crept forward to join the exhausted group.

“Turns out when the last man from the Earth died on the Ark, he wasn’t the last grounder” Finn spoke ominously, shifting his gaze toward Clarke, apprehension on both of their faces.

“That means we can survive” Y/N spoke up, trying to remain optimistic, “Radiation won’t kill us.”

“But the grounders will” Clarke finished, eyes flickering toward her wrist, relieved to see Y/N still had her wristband on, retreating further into the camp as Bellamy knelt next to Octavia. 

Panicked whispers began to grow around the camp, spreading like a wildfire at the thought of other humans attacking one of their own. 

She flipped her attention away from the dissipating crowd back to the sibling duo. Something tugged on her heartstrings, almost as if the helpless look on Bellamy’s face was asking for someone else to step in. 

What little medical experience she had she learned from her mother and helping Clarke study for the doctoral exams. So it wasn’t much, but she knew how to wrap a wound and that was enough for now.

Y/N moved forward, palms open in an olive branch as she asked to inspect the wound. 

“Why?” Bellamy asked, guard up, “So you can make another sarcastic remark about us?” “Bell…” Octavia spoke softly, her nod enough consent to inspect the bleeding gash in her leg. 

“The good news is that it looks okay.” Y/N responded, cleaning the wound as best she could and retying the bandage, “The bad news is that I am not a qualified professional so take that with a grain of salt.” 

Octavia burst into giggles at the joke, Y/N’s chuckles mixing with the younger girls laughter. 

All Bellamy could do was stare. 

“We’re headed to find Jasper.” Clarke appeared from nowhere, toting Finn and Wells behind her. “We could really use you out there Y/N.”

“Try and stop me.” The engineer smiled, patting the knife on her side, her mind drifting to the scientific journal buried in her pocket, each page containing endless useful information about their unknown home.

Octavia struggled to stand up, “I’m coming too.”

“Forget it” Bellamy ordered, pushing her back down “You’re staying here.”

Octavia looked like she was about to protest until Clarke stepped in. “He’s right, your leg will just slow us down anyway.”

Y/N faced the reckless teen. “I’ll try and find something to use on your leg when I get back.”

Octavia shot a grateful look at the engineer, grasping tightly to the log she was sitting on. 

“I’m here for you” Clarke turned her attention to Bellamy, catching everyone in the vicinity by surprise. “I hear you have a gun.”

Bellamy lifted up his shirt, exposing the pistol stuck into the band of his jeans. Y/N scoffed internally, of course, he would have a gun. Of all the kids in the camp, he was the one with the firearm?

They must really be screwed.

“Good” Clarke began to move out, “Follow me.”

“Why would I do that?”

Clarke’s face pulled back in surprise, “because you want them to follow you, and right now they’re thinking only one of us is scared.”

Bellamy paused for a full beat before grabbing Murphy and following the group out of camp. Y/N rolled her eyes internally as the attacker joined their party, the group heading out into the same woods that had swallowed up Jasper not too long ago. 

“Let’s split up” Finn suggested, sending an incredibly unsubtle look toward Clarke. 

Wells gulped, stepping forward protectively, “I’ll go with Clarke.”

“No!” Clarke jumped in, a resentful look on her face, “Stay with Y/N.” The blonde shifted her gaze before following after the spacewalker. 

“Clarke wait!” She ran after the blonde, grasping her hand incredulously. “You’re just going to leave me with him?”

“You know the most about this place” She rationalized, gaze flickering to her pocket, “someone has to take care of those three” She flicked her gaze back at the trio, “Besides you get along better with him than I do.”

“You know that’s not true.”

Clarke smiled, tearing her hand out of Y/N’s grip. “You’ll be fine, now go.”

She nodded, swallowing the irritation into her stomach as she trudged through the greenery, unable to enjoy the beauty of the planet surrounding her due to the arguing behind her. She could feel eyes watching her every move, although she wasn’t quite sure if it was Bellamy or Murphy. 

The annoyance continued to build and twist until Bellamy spoke for the first time since leaving Camp.

“Must suck to be in love with someone who doesn’t know you exist.” He taunted Wells. 

“Shut up Bellamy.” The teen responded.

“I’m just saying” Bellamy continued, “with Finn around it’s like she doesn’t even see you.”

Y/N rolled her eyes, irritation pooling at the stupidity of the argument, “Can you guys finish your pissing contest later? I’m trying to concentrate.”

She pushed forward, her movements halting as Bellamy grasped her bicep, keeping her in place as his hand trailed down her forearm, landing on the steel wristband surrounding her hand. 

“Take this off and I’ll consider doing whatever you say.”

A laugh escaped her mouth involuntarily, catching the leader off guard. She ripped her wrist out of his enormous palm, tilting her chin upward to meet him in the eye. “You want the Ark to think I’m dead? Kill me first.”

“Believe me, it’s not for a lack of trying” Murphy interjected, crossing his arms, a sneer growing on his face as he recalled the events of the morning.

“You know what Blake?” Y/N had reached her breaking point, annoyance bubbling over until she couldn’t handle it anymore. “You can play leader all you want, but don’t pretend it’s for anything other than your own selfish motives.” The words flowed from her brain straight to her mouth, filter forgotten. “You can pretend it’s for your sister, or for some higher purpose but I know the truth. You’re just a scared kid afraid of getting in trouble because he did something the adults wouldn’t pardon him for.”

His jaw clenched at the accusation. 

She had found his weak spot.

Y/N smiled dangerously.

“So go ahead, play leader, hide behind your sister, hell, you can even pretend to see through me, it doesn’t change the fact that I. See. Through. You.”

Her thin finger poked his chest, emphasizing her point further. The guard grabbed the limb in his hand, eyes flickering from Y/N’s face to the bracelet.

Tense silence stood between the two, broken only by Clarke’s voice calling them forward, claiming to have discovered new tracks. 

“Jasper!” Clarke called, running toward the low moaning, Y/N following soon after. The tracks exited into a clearing, a bare tree standing in the middle, Jasper’s limp body tied against the bark.

“Jasper hang on!” Y/N called, searching the ground for a safe way to the tree, ignoring Clarke’s stride forward. “Clarke wait--”

The ground collapsed beneath her, spikes awaiting the kids beneath the trap, Bellamy’s arm the only thing keeping Clarke tethered to the world above. Finn and Wells hurried to pull the two delinquents up, Bellamy still entranced by the trap before him.

“They knew we were coming” Y/n murmured, “That’s why they kept him alive.”

Finn and Murphy moved forward, as the three remaining teens brandished what weapons they held, ready to fight off whatever grounders awaited them. Instead, they were greeted with a low growl and shivering grass.

“Bellamy,” Y/N warned, eyes never leaving the green stalks, “Now would be a good time to take out that gun.”

He nodded, hand moving to the hem of his shirt, ready to fire at whatever awaited in the grass. It only took a second for the panther to lock eyes on one of them. 

“Bellamy,” She warned, pulse quickening, “Now.”

The older boy nodded, hand grasping for the hilt, only to meet empty air. 

Gunshots rang out from Wells’ hand, forcing the panther back into the grass, Y/N’s eyes scanning the edges near her and Bellamy, watching for the slightest quiver.

Instead, she caught the slightest glimpse of black, the flickering of a tail slowing right near Bellamy. 

“Bellamy watch out!” Her heart took over her head, and she jumped in front of the taller kid, pushing him behind her as she braced herself for impact, a gunshot silencing the panther once and for all.

Her breathing grew ragged, eyes locked firmly on the dead animal at her feet, refusing to register any words other than Bellamy’s simple, “Now she sees you.”

His face dropped, mouth hanging open in an ‘o’ as his eyes threatened to bug out of his head. It was the perfect mirror image of Clarke’s, unable to believe someone he hated had risked their life to save his. Unable to believe someone thought he was worth saving.

But Y/N never saw his face.

***

Try as he might, Bellamy could not tear his gaze from Y/N. 

She sat with Clarke and Finn, refusing to take off her bracelet, sharing with the two other delinquents. 

The three people who kept challenging his position in the camp.

The three people he needed to deal with quickly. 

And yet...

He wanted to thank her. To go over and offer his piece of the panther as a peace offering for saving his life. To start a truce. 

She was smart. She was the top engineer back on the Ark. She could offer a lot. 

But she was right.

She saw right through him, and he couldn’t have that.

Ooooh, what’s this? A medium burn again? Perhaps, or perhaps I’m fooling you all, who knows?

Please comment, like, and reblog!

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[ladyfogg]

Cold is the Night - 13/20

Cold is the Night - 13/20

Fic Summary: You and Pat have known each other for years but this summer, everything will change. As the two of you start to grow close, your matching tempers threaten the foundation of your rocky friendship and prevent both of you from realizing your true feelings. Cold is the Night Masterpost. 

Fic Song: Cold is the Night by The Oh Hellos. Fic playlist can be found here. 

Pairing: Pat Murray/Female Reader

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: Language, Slow Burn, Eventual Smut, Multiple Chapters

Gif by @mazzelloh

The next morning, Pat awoke to softness and sunlight. At first, he thought everything had been a dream. A wonderfully erotic dream. 

When he opened his eyes, he expected to be home in his own bed. But when he saw the familiar colors of your bedroom and felt your soft breath tickling his chest as you slept, he realized it had all been real. 

Only slightly hungover, he squinted at the clock on the nightstand. It was barely seven. You were warm and naked, tucked against his chest. Pat had never slept overnight with a girl before and now that he had, he wanted to do it every night. 

But only with you.

Pat admired your sleeping face, unable to believe his luck. You not only had forgiven him but agreed to be his girlfriend. On top of that, he got to make you come. 

He'll never forget how fucking stunning you looked, moaning and rocking against him as he ate you out. He swore he could still taste you on his lips and if it wasn't so early, he'd slip under the blankets and give you a pleasurable wakeup call.

Grinning like an idiot, he buried his face back into your hair again. The action stirred you awake. 

“Ugh, what time is it?” you asked sleepily. 

“Early,” Pat replied. “Go back to sleep.”

“M’kay.”

You passed back out. Pat smiled and followed soon after. 

When he awoke again sometime later, the sun was brighter and he was alone in bed. With a sleepy groan, he pushed himself up to sit. Aside from being thirsty, he actually didn’t feel too bad. The AC helped keep the room at a reasonable temperature, though he shuddered as he pulled the comforter up over his nakedness. He was just about to call out for you when the door to the bathroom opened and you shuffled out, hair a mess and still completely nude.

You had been naked last night of course, but in the weak lamplight he had only seen you shrouded in shadow. Now you stood before him in the sunlight, more stunning than he ever could have imagined. The realization that you let him touch you was almost too much to comprehend. 

“I think you gave me a hickey,” you said as you tried to look at your neck in the mirror above your dresser. 

Pat barely heard you, distracted by your ass that he definitely hadn't had a chance to see. 

You caught sight of him staring and smirked. “What?”

“Fuck, you’re beautiful,” he blurted out, unable to stop gawking. 

You blushed and slowly spun around to face him. He was so distracted, he didn’t notice you grab the end of the comforter. “You’re not so bad yourself, Murray.” You pulled back the sheet, leaving Pat fully exposed as well. “Baseball is really good for you.”

He tried not to be self-conscious, especially when his morning wood clearly became interested in the new development. The hungry look in your eye definitely gave him a shot of self-confidence. 

Your eyes grew hooded and you bit your lip as you knelt on the bed. As you crawled up his body, leaning in for a kiss, Pat stopped you.

“Hold that thought.” He wiggled out from under you and made for the bathroom. As badly as he wanted to kiss you, his mouth felt horrible and he wanted to rinse it out first. 

You flopped onto the bed with a stretch. “Hurry back.”

In the bathroom, Pat washed up, studying his reflection in the mirror. There was a very dark mark on his neck to match the one you had and he couldn’t help but grin as he touched it. He remembered how eager and determined you were to get him off, your hand pumping him with practiced determination. 

It wasn't just the hickey Pat noticed. He looked happier. Noticeably happier. There was a change in his stance and he felt confidence he hadn't experienced before. 

When he returned to the bedroom, you were exactly where he had left you: lying on your side in an obviously staged pose. It didn't make it any less sexy. With a smirk, you beckoned him forward. 

Pat practically jumped onto the bed, sending you into a fit of laughter. When he kissed you, it felt like the world righted itself. You melted underneath him, hands running up his arms. He became acutely aware that not a shred of clothing separated you and it would only take shifting his hips slightly for his cock to slide between your legs.

But before he could ask, Pat’s phone started to ring. He swore. 

“Hang on.” Leaning over the bed, he felt around for his pants until he found them. You made it difficult for him to take out his phone, as you started placing kisses up his bare back. When he saw who was calling, and the time, he swore again. “Oh, fucking hell!”

“What’s the matter?”

“I’m supposed to help my uncle move today. I have like, five missed calls from my dad.” His peaceful bubble shattered into a million pieces. 

“Ditch him.” You pressed against his back, kissing his neck. 

Pat leaned into the touch with a moan. “Fuck do I want to,” he said. “But he’s paying me. And I want to save up to get my own place.”

With a sigh, you wrapped your arms around him in a hug. “Okaaay. I guess you can leave.”

Pat turned and cupped your cheek, giving you another kiss. “Trust me. I’d rather stay here with you.” With a grimace, he hoisted himself to his feet. 

You watched him dress, pulling up the blanket to cover yourself. “I’m working the next couple of nights straight through. I don’t know when I’ll be free again.”

Pat stepped into his jeans, pulling them up over his hips. “I can come by and hang out like I did before. Unless you think your boss may still be pissed.”

You wrinkled your nose. “Better not risk it. He’s been in a shitty mood lately. Do you work tomorrow? Maybe we can go out to breakfast.”

Slipping his shirt on, Pat said, “Yeah, I work the next three days.”

“This is bullshit,” you declared. “I want to spend time with my boyfriend. But nooooo, we both have to work. Fucking Capitalism!”

Pat grinned, sitting on the edge of the bed as he buttoned his shirt. “I like hearing you call me your boyfriend.”

Smirking, you sat up again, leaning in close enough to place a soft kiss on his cheek. “My boyfriend,” you whispered into his ear. Your tongue teasing dipped in and Pat shuddered. 

“Ugh, don’t do that. I have to leave.”

“You sure?” Your teeth tugged on his earlobe. Even though he was already dressed, you reached down to lay your hand on his thigh. “It’ll be more fun if you stay.”

“No, I’m not sure, but I should probably go,” he said, gently removing your hand. “Just one more thing before I do.” He took the edge of the blanket and peeled it back enough to look at your naked body again. “Nice.”

With a laugh, you shoved him. “Go on, Murray. Go be a big man and move stuff.”

He swooped down to give you a deep kiss, relishing the feeling before he had to regrettably pull away. “We’ve got another game this weekend. It would mean a lot to me if you were there.”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

As much as he didn’t want to, Pat was forced to leave the comfort of your bed to go meet up with his dad. After he retrieved his car from Vinnie’s house, he sped home. He found his father standing on the front stoop, phone in hand as he no doubt tried to call Pat for the tenth time. 

“There you are!” he exclaimed as his son got out of the car. “I was worried sick!”

“I’m fine. I’m here now. Let’s go.”

“No, no, you don’t get to do that,” Brian declared. “You don’t get to be gone all night then show up late like nothing happened.”

“Dad, I’m a fucking adult, I can do whatever I want!”

“You’re an adult who made a commitment. At the very least you should have called.”

The last thing Pat wanted to do was get into a fight with his dad. Last night had been the best night of his life and he didn’t want his good mood ruined. Unfortunately, it looked like it was already heading that way. 

“Alright, fine, I’m sorry. Happy?”

Brian clenched his jaw. Clearly, Pat’s apology didn’t help. “We’re late. We’ll discuss this later.”

“Oh joy.”

The rest of the day was incredibly tense between the father and son. They barely spoke to each other unless they absolutely had to. Pat’s uncle didn’t seem to mind their tardiness since apparently he hadn’t even finished packing. What was supposed to be a quick job, turned into six hours of grueling work. By the time they climbed back into his dad’s truck to head home, they were both sore and seething. 

Pat knew their argument was far from over. As soon as he got into the house he tried to make a beeline for his room.

"I don't think so," Brian said, blocking his path. "We need to have a serious discussion, Patrick."

"I already said sorry for being late."

"This isn't just about being late. It's about being responsible."

"I am responsible. I have a job, I go to school, I pay for my car...I'm not a child. Stop talking down to me!"

"I'm not talking down to you, I'm worried about you. It's like you have no direction in your life."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"You go to work and to class, but you never talk about what you're going to do with your life."

Pat clenched his fists, beyond angry and insulted. "I'm in my twenties, Dad, what the fuck do you expect? Not everyone knows what they want to do. And besides, I have baseball. I work my ass off for the team and you know how much I love the game."

"I do and I support you. I just think you need to find a fall-back."

His words were like a slap in the face and Pat's shoulders slumped in defeat. It was like all the air had been knocked from his lungs. He felt sick to his stomach.

"You don't think I'm good enough to have a career in baseball…"

"That's not what I said!"

"Bullshit! That's exactly what you said!"

"I only meant that chances of being drafted are slim and I would feel better if you had something more tangible to fall back on."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. While they had never been very close, baseball was the one interest they had in common. It was how they bonded, and hearing his dad suggest he give up on his dream was too much for Pat to handle.

"You know, it's hard enough hearing from the guys that they don't think I'm good enough. Never expected to hear it from my own dad."

Pat pushed past him and headed for his room, ignoring his father's calls to come back. He slammed the door behind him and sat on his bed. Briefly, he thought of barricading himself there for the rest of the night. But the walls started to close in on him and he knew he couldn't stay. 

Pat went to his closet. From deep in the back he pulled out a duffle bag and shoved a bunch of clothes into it. He also took the ribbon off his dresser and put that in too.

Once he had what he needed, he slung the strap of the bag over his shoulder, tucked his laptop under his arm, and left his room. His dad was in the hall but Pat stepped around him, heading for the front door.

"Pat, Pat! Where are you going?"

"Away from here."

"Don't. Come on, let's talk this out."

"Fuck you."

Brian followed him all the way outside but Pat was determined to leave. He ignored his dad's pleas and climbed into his car. 

"Patrick, don't do this."

Looking at his dad right in the eye, he started the car and peeled out of the driveway, tires squealing.

Before Pat knew it, he found himself outside your house. You weren’t due back from work for several hours, but he didn’t know where else to go. Angry and tired, he sat on the front steps to wait. 

His phone buzzed and he was sure it was his dad, but it was a text from you. 

On my break. Missing you already.

Pat typed so fast he almost dropped the phone. Big fight with my dad. Left home.

Your response was quick. Where are you? 

Outside your house.

I'll be there in ten minutes.

Pat considered telling you not to worry about him but he needed to see you. He was a mess of emotions, stuck between angry, sad, and deflated. He thought he was doing fucking okay but apparently it wasn't good enough. 

Why did he have to have a plan? Why couldn't he just live his fucking life the way he wanted? 

Headlights roused him out of his daze and Pat looked up, not noticing how much time had passed. He was relieved to see your car pull into the driveway. You slammed the brakes on a little too hard as you parked and got out.

“Pat, what happened?” you asked as you crossed the lawn to get to him. He noticed you wore his hoodie and seeing you in his clothes made him realize he was exactly where he should be. 

Pat didn’t answer. Instead, he rose to his feet and met you halfway, pulling you into a big hug. You hugged him back without hesitation and it broke him. For the first time in years, he cried. He tried not to, didn't want to shed tears over some stupid fight between him and his dad. But he couldn't help it. 

You didn’t ask him any more questions. All you did was rub his back, whispering words of comfort. 

“It’s alright. I’ve got you. I've got you," you said in a soothing voice. "Come on, let’s go inside.”

Numb, Pat allowed you to lead him into the house. 

[whatcouldgowrong-ohthat]

Hurts to be Human Chapter 3

Hey guys!! I have internet!! It’s a miracle!! But because I don’t have it long, I am not having this edited. Just going for it and hoping for the best. o.o But here is chapter 3 of Hurts to be Human!! Thank you for being patient!!!

Warnings: I mean, I don’t really think there are any? I think it’s all good this time around!! 

Please don’t post this anywhere without my permission o.o

No gif because I suck..I’m sorry :(

Chapter Three — Walk Me Home

“Life isn’t picking and choosing where you left off and where you can begin again, Bucky.”

Bucky shifted his gaze from the ground to the man sitting across from him. He was older, fought in Vietnam. He was someone he could relate to. A vet with a rough past, someone who did things they weren’t exactly proud of. It was why Sam recommended him. Hell, it was why he worked as his therapist. And seeing him, the man reminded Bucky of when he and Steve had seen Snow White. He was shorter, on the rounder side with constantly flushed cheeks, a big nose, and glasses.

Thus the nickname “Doc” was born.

It helped that he was also a doctor, but the nickname definitely had nothing to do with that and had everything to do with the Disney classic.

“I know, I know,” Bucky agreed, unclasping his hands and leaning back on the couch. He slouched, still not as short as Doc was in his chair. No, still the man managed to be shorter than him. It was incredible really. Bucky couldn’t help, but wonder — how short was the guy’s torso? It was a thought that crossed his mind at least once every session.

“Bucky, are you listening?” Bucky jerked, blinking when he realized he’d zoned out. It happened only when Doc tried telling him something he didn’t like. They both knew it and Doc wasn’t fond of it. “You do know that you pay me for my honesty and help, right?”

Bucky chuckled, smiling as he ran a hand through his short hair. Still, he wasn’t used to the length. He was used to the mane he had for sixty years. Give or take a few. It was a shield, a barrier to protect him from the outside world. Doc and him had several sessions over cutting it and how that would open Bucky up, provide him with a new level of vulnerability. And now that vulnerability meant a different sort of relationship with Y/N.

Y.N. That damn woman. She had been at the compound for two weeks, constantly working on damage control with the media while Sharon took on the government. They finally took the time to explain to Sam and Bucky what was going on and he didn’t like it. He didn’t like that she had to clean up his mess. She was back. Shouldn’t he be taking the time to learn about the woman she had become? Especially after their last conversation? It seemed playing pretend provided new opportunities to frustrate Bucky. He wanted to go back, not to the way they left things, but back to when things were good. 

And Doc was reminding him that that was not a good idea.

“Believe me, it’s hard to forget,” he snarked back, earning an amused chuckle from the old man. Old man. Bucky chuckled to himself. He was still older than Doc, but he looked far from it. “And I do understand, but…”

“You miss her.”

Bucky frowned, looking away. He wasn’t ready to admit that — not aloud, not to anyone else. If he did, that meant there was a whole new level of admitting, of facing the thing he had walked away from.

“It’s okay to miss her. She was your closest friend after Steve left. And when she did —“

“Thin ice, Doc.”

He quieted and Bucky managed to breath a sigh of relief, his shoulders relaxing in the slightest sort of way. The phrase was a warning, something they had come up with when Doc pried too fast. At first it was something used every week. The initial wall Bucky had, required Doc earning his trust, earning his thoughts and concerns so that they could make progress. He hadn’t actually used the phrase in almost a year. Then again, they hadn’t talked about Y/N in almost a year. 

Drumming his pen on his fingers, Doc tried to tread carefully on the sensitive topic. Silence fell between them in those moments. What about Y/N was safe to discuss and yet would bring about an opportunity for Bucky to open up more? Finally, Doc asked, “You said she has a pet now? Was that something she was initially against?”

Bucky nodded. “H.D. I…when we were together, I always talked about getting a pet. Something to take care of.”

“And something that could also take care of you.” Doc smiled knowingly as Bucky looked up.  Clearly the super soldier hadn’t expected that to be so blatantly clear. “Pets have a way of bringing out a person’s softer side. They’re good for us. It’s why we train them to be service animals. It’s no surprise to hear that was something you were considering.”

Bucky was bitter as he muttered, “She was so against it.”

“Why?”

Frustrated. “Hell if I know. She told me it was because they’re too needy.”

“You sound like you don’t believe that.” 

He sighed, running his hands through his hair. The feeling was a distraction from the topic at hand. At one point in his life, he rarely touched his hair. When he became the Winter Soldier, it was simply to get it out of his sight when lining up a target. Once he reunited with Steve, it became a nervous habit, something he used to bring him back to his reality. The habit, something Y/N often teased him about, was something he still couldn’t break. It was comforting in an odd sort of way. 

“Bucky?”

He looked up, blinking before he finally answered, “No, of course I don’t. This is the same girl that would run up to dogs in the park. She’d beg the owners to let her pet them, Doc. At shelters, she would have as many cats as possible just curled up on her as if she were wearing a ‘welcome home’ sign. Hell, Finding Nemo was one of her favorite movies and she bought a mug with that dog from Up on it. Someone like that doesn’t think pets are too needy.”

“No?”

Bucky hesitated, knowing why Doc was questioning him. He wanted Bucky to think past the rashness of his initial thoughts and assumptions. Though his process was always quick and calculating, it was more often right when he was the Winter Soldier. Now? He was just Bucky.

Even so, he felt he was right. He knew he was right.

“No. Y/N wasn’t avoiding the idea of a pet because they’re needy. It…” He hesitated as the realization finally sunk in, heavy like a hunk of lead on his heart. “She felt broken. Feeling like that, knowing you’re broken, you don’t feel like you deserve to have anything good in your life. Not even something as small as a pet because they…well, they need you, they rely on you.”

“Some people seem to believe they might not be fully capable of taking care of a pet to the extent the animal deserves.”

“Fuck, I’m an ass,” Bucky groaned, running a hand over his face.

Doc laughed, shaking his head. “Far from it, Bucky. You’re human and you’re one of those in the world that has been put through a great deal.”

“But shouldn’t I have realized or noticed? Something?” Doc didn’t say anything, only looking at him. It was frustrating to say the least. “Come on, Doc.”

Doc adjusted his glasses and wrote something down before explaining, “I don’t think so. While we haven’t talked much about Y/N in the past, what you have told me has provided me enough clarity on the subject. The two of you were working through a great deal and relying on each other in a way that eventually became unhealthy. It lacked stability, communication, and openness. Instead, the two of you became lost in yourselves and your own trauma. With that in mind, it’s only understandable that you’d grow oblivious in each other’s needs while sorting through your own.”

Bucky stared at the ground, unable to let go of the guilt that twisted in his gut. They were supposed to be a team and yet he had grown completely oblivious to her and her needs. She had felt broken, shattered, and he never even realized.

—

Bucky’s session had ended not long after his realization. It seemed he always had the best timing when it came to his time with Doc. A miraculous breakthrough followed by the last five minutes and Doc doing his best to work with the time he had. Stepping outside, he quickly took a step back when he saw the downpour that greeted him. 

He truly did have the best timing, didn’t he?

Staring up at the darkened sky, Bucky huffed a frustrated sigh and watched as the cold air tinted his breath. Adjusting his leather jacket, he allowed the rough material to protect him from the chill. Then came tugging at his gloves, keeping his metal arm hidden from onlookers. Always careful, always checking. It was part of his routine. 

As he searched for what he hoped would be a much needed pause in the weather, he noticed the art gallery across the street. It was something new and edgy that Shuri had told him to look into. Apparently it was one of her favorite places to visit when she stopped by. He never did look into it, of course. The only art he really looked at was Steve’s and that stopped a long time ago. No, now he looked not because of the art, but because of who was finishing with a purchase just inside. He smiled, leaning against the brick wall as he watched her. This wasn’t weird, right? Watching her? As a curious and concerned friend?

No, certainly not weird at all.

Today she had worn one of those slouchy beanies he’d often seen this time of year. It was a maroon sort of color, the shade complimenting her skin as if it was made for her. She turned and stepped outside and his eyebrows shot up. Over the leggings and boots, over the t-shirt, barely peeking through, was the leather jacket he’d given her all those years ago. 

It could be a new one.

He brushed aside the voice in his head, searching for the key to knowing whether his hopes were true. She turned, facing his direction, and immediately he couldn’t stop himself from smiling. There, on the corner of the collar, was a red star that matched the one from his old arm. She’d insisted on getting it to symbolize that she wasn’t scared of that part of his past. Everyone teased her about it, but she never seemed to care.

And she kept it.

That had to mean something, right?

“Y/N!” 

She looked at him, that familiar surprise flashing across her features for only a brief moment before she smiled. They had been making progress in their friendship, but it never seemed to go farther than morning coffee or running into each other in the hall. They were friendly, but he wouldn’t exactly call them friends. Now? He had a chance to spend time with her. He had a chance to actually be her friend.

Glancing from one side of the street to the other, he quickly jogged across and joined her side. He noticed the canvas tucked under her arm, neatly packaged away so as to protect it from the weather. A part of him wanted to ask, but he knew better. Y/N was still painfully private, still guarded. He had to show her that she could trust him again.

“What are you doing here?” She was curious, brow furrowed and a breathy laugh escaping her. The last person either of them expected to run into was obviously the person standing before them. 

Bucky gestured to the building he had just left, shrugging. “Therapy. What about you? Since when are you an art fanatic?” He grinned, unable to help himself as he gestured to the rather large piece she held close to her side.

She glanced down at the package, her ears turning a light pink. Looking at him, a sheepish smile and small shrug were her only form of explanation before she finally elaborated. “I was sick of looking at blank walls. Tony didn’t exactly pick the prettiest shade of white to paint the whole damn place. I swear, I was starting to feel like I was in some sort of mental ward.”

He nodded. “Fair enough.” 

Joining her side, the two started walking down the street. Neither seemed to be entirely sure where they were headed or aware of the fact that the rain was giving its best attempts at soaking them to the bone. Instead, they simply enjoyed each other’s presence, as if it were a gift. 

“I can carry that for you,” he offered, finally breaking the silence that had seemingly settled between them. He’d noticed her shift the awkward thing a few times, trying to find a way to carry it. It seemed there was no way.

“Nah, don’t worry about it. It’s not heavy. Just awkward, you know?”

“I figured, but I really don’t mind helping. That’s what friends are for, right?”

Y/N rolled her eyes and begrudgingly let him take the canvas. He tucked it under his metal arm, his free hand brushing against hers as it dropped back to his side. Every instinct in him wanted to reach out, to touch her. Even when they were friends, she always let him touch her. It was his way of staying grounded when he first went through losing Steve. He had relied on it, rarely ever letting her stray far because he craved the physical contact. The feeling, that connection, was what bonded them for so long.

But that was then and this is now.

Now, that urge didn’t feel quite the same. He wanted to touch her, but it wasn’t so desperate. There wasn’t a need or desperation to touch her, to drink her in as if she was the very water he needed to live. Instead, the feeling was subtle, reminding him of the small breeze that would come in when summer transitioned to fall. It was cool, calming — something to be appreciated. When did that feeling change? When did that carnal, overwhelming craving shift into something far sweeter?

“Bucky?”

He looked up, surprised to see Y/N waving a hand in his face. She laughed at the doe-eyed look of bewilderment that came with those bright blue eyes and parted lips. He looked like a child hearing their mother call their name for the fifth time, middle name and all creating that look of a deer caught in the headlights. 

“You alright?”

Clearing his throat, Bucky nodded and the two kept walking. “Yeah, just —“

“Thinking? Was it about your session?”

No. “Yeah.” Really, is lying the best way to get their friendship going? He hesitated. “No,” he corrected.

“So which is it?”

Bucky laughed at the way she raised her eyebrow, knowing if she drew it up any further it would get lost in her hairline. “No, I wasn’t thinking about my session.”

“Then…penny for your thoughts?”

He looked away from her, shrugging. How could he voice how he was feeling? The thoughts in his head? How could he tell her that a part of him missed what they were, but understood her wishes?

Just tell her, Buck. You won’t get very far with someone like Y/N if you aren’t honest. The familiar sound of Sam’s voice reminded him that the birdbrain was basically the angel on his shoulder. He might drive Bucky crazy, but his intentions were true and good, always looking out for Bucky’s best interests. 

You lost her once. Tell her that bullshit in your head and she won’t be sticking around much longer. There it was. The Winter Soldier, a reminder of what he had been. Working with Doc had muddled that voice for the most part, but he and Doc both knew they could never fully rid him of the devil in his head.

It seemed he was always fighting, always trying to figure who was best to listen to. Why couldn’t he ever listen to himself? 

His silence left an impression that perhaps Y/N had overstepped. She ducked her head, rubbing the back of her head as she told him, “You don’t have to share. Sorry for —“

“No!” His panicked voice came out a little higher, a little squeakier, and left a bright pink hue on his cheeks. She looked up, biting her lip to keep herself from laughing. “I — You don’t have to apologize, Y/N.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.” He nudged her gently and was happy to see her shoulders relax. She even knocked into him playfully, something he hadn’t expected. That was a good sign, right? He bit the inside of his cheek before finally telling her, “I was thinking about how much I missed this.”

Confusion. That was the look that greeted him.

Genius. Fuck that birdbrain. Fuck the fact that he could hear the damn guy in his head all the time.

 “Missed what?”

Bucky gestured between them as he elaborated. “This. Us. I missed having my best friend around. I mean, the ‘why’ you’re here sucks, that’s for sure, but I’m really glad you’re back. Does that make sense?”

She smiled. It was brilliant and as bright as the one she offered to everyone else. Slowly, she was letting him back in. Slowly, but just as surely as he was letting her. They needed baby steps and time. Moments like this would certainly help. “I am too. Don’t tell Fury I said this, but I’m glad he found me.”

“Knowing Fury, I think it’s safe to say it was never a matter of finding. He always knew where you were.”

She snorted and he grinned. Y/N never let herself laugh so openly. Not before. Not with him. “Fair enough. You’re probably right.”

“Probably?”

“Okay, you’re completely and utterly right. Is that what you want to hear?”

Bucky laughed, his grin spreading from ear to ear. “Was that so hard?”

Y/N rolled her eyes, shoving her shivering hands in her pockets. It was the only thing keeping her from holding his hand, borrowing his warmth. She didn’t want to repeat history. In fact, she refused to. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them. “You’re utterly ridiculous.”

“Maybe, but then again, you’re the one letting me walk you home.”

She gaped at him. “We live in the same compound, Barnes!”

—

The sound of the door opening and closing caught the attention of one SHIELD agent and one superhero, pulling their focus from the news on the television. The squelch of a pair of shoes and soft thud of a pair of heels signaled exactly who had come back. When did they even run into each other?

Sam exhaled sharply through his nose, earning a look from Sharon. He didn’t seem to notice, instead watching through the doorway as Bucky and Y/N passed through the kitchen. They were laughing and smiling, a level of ease around one another that hadn’t been there before. Neither stopped to check if anyone was home, instead continuing on their way to the dorms. It was then he noticed a particular detail that left him more than a little curious. Both were utterly drenched. “Did they walk the whole way?” he asked, looking back at Sharon. When he noticed her look, he raised his hands in defense. “What, what’d I do?”

“You’re worried.”

“Wouldn’t you be?”

“Oh, I am. I’m just curious what it is you’re worried about.”

Sam frowned, looking away. The arm that was propped on the couch held the weight of his cheek as he tried to find a way to explain this. He didn’t want to come off like an ass after all. “He’s doing good, Sharon. He’s better than he was the last time she was here.”

“She’s better too.”

“I know! And I’m happy for both of them.”

“But?”

Sam’s brow furrowed as he rubbed his forehead. “I’m concerned that they’ll take steps back.”

“What, now that they’re around each other again?”

“It happened before. They were doing good, going strong, then everything got worse.”

“They’ve grown a lot since then,” Sharon reminded him. She shifted, turning her body to face him as she tucked a leg into her chest. “Fury debated bringing her in for a long time because he knew they were doing so good. He doesn’t want anyone backtracking. Especially not Y/N. She means as much to him as Nat did.”

“I know, I know.”

“You’re going soft for Barnes,” she teased, grinning and earning a glare from her teammate.

“I am not.”

“Are too.”

“Am not, Carter.”

“Prove it, Wilson.”

Sam groaned, throwing his head back and staring at the ceiling. The woman was utterly infuriating and usually right. He knew he’d developed a friendship with Bucky after Steve left. And after Y/N left, that friendship grew stronger. He helped Bucky with a lot of his PTSD, brought him to VA meetings, and helped him find a therapist. Everything he could possibly do to help Bucky in the right direction, he was there for. The last thing he wanted was to see his friend spiral again. To lose all that progress over one girl? It didn’t make sense to him. “I can’t.”

“I know.”

“Your smugness is not appreciated.”

“Look,” Sharon told him, earning his attention and pulling it away from the bland ceiling. “They don’t need each other anymore, Sam. Both of them have grown on their own. They aren’t the same people they were and maybe…maybe they just want each other now.”

“They were wrong for each other then. Why not now?”

“The right person at the wrong time is still the wrong person, Sam. Maybe that’s all it was. The wrong time.”

Sam huffed, shaking his head. “I don’t like when you’re right.”

“But I’m always right.” He smacked her with a pillow, earning a squeal and laugh from her. She grabbed the popcorn bowl from the table, tossing it in his lap. “For that, you get to grab the popcorn while I pick a movie!”

He groaned, loud enough for anyone in the compound to hear his clear irritation. “Oh, come on!”

[all-of-the-imagines-for-eve]

Forget About It ~ Sweet Pea (Part 3)

A/n: Let me know what you guys think of this! I may be getting back into the swing of things and pick up old series and finish things up or continue stuff again. I’m open for ideas or suggestions, new requests or next parts, or just a general "Please". Give me things to write lol. Not my gif!

Word Count: 4617

MASTERLIST

You, are a shining example of why I don't sleep at all. Too many sheep on the brain to make sense of the late night call, talkin' in circles and chasing the tail of a love drunk distant memory. Am I sure that she's the one?

When the word went out that Riverdale had to be well behaved for 48 short hours, I was sure we would make it. Then Jughead came to me with a huge dilemma and ruined that surety and hope.

"Come on, Y/n," he groaned. "There are very few people I can trust right now."

My eyes landed him in a dark glare. "Jones, 48 hours. We've been given 48 hours. That's it!"

Jughead ran a hand through his hair in agitation. "My dad might not have 48 hours!"

I shook my head. "Jug, are you sure you're seeing this right? Your dad is a big boy who can take care of himself and he would be SO mad at you for dealing drugs to get him out. What if she's lying? What if-"

Jughead had never looked so angry in the time that I had known him. And I'd known him for a very long time. "Forget it," he spat, turning his back on me. "I'll just call Archie. I was thinking of calling him anyway." He looked at me for a few second before spitting, "I should have know." My eyebrows came together and he took a step toward me, making me jump as he poked me aggressively in the chest with his finger. "You. You walk around here like you know what it's like to be us. Like you know what it's like to be a Serpent or even a South Sider. You live with us and dress like us and even act like us but when it comes down to it, you're not. You've CHOSEN this life. You have a father and a brother waiting for you on the North Side. A brother I'm running to help for despite how much more I trust you. You were supposed to have my back Andrews... but I guess-" He cut off and my heart throbbed.

My face hardened as I refused to cry in front of him. "Say it," I snarled. He looked at me, suddenly unsure and regretful. But I was mad too now. "Say it!"

Our eyes locked and we both mirrored the others' anger. "You're a North Sider. Stop acting like you're not."

My breaths got caught in my throat and I swallowed. "I guess Tall Boy was right," I mumbled darkly. "I'm not one of you guys. I never was and I never will be. I've known from the start. I'm just glad I didn't get the tattoo before I realized it for real." I moved away from him, grabbing my jacket off the counter - a regular jean jacket that had no emblem or insignia on it - and left the trailer, allowing him to have it to himself again. It obviously wasn't somewhere I was welcome anymore.

I walked for half an hour before I realized I had no idea where I was going. I couldn't go back to the North Side. Every weekend I went to visit my dad, I felt more and more foreign. My neighbors have started to turn their noses up at me and my so called brother won't even look at me anymore. My dad was as gentle and loving as always, saying he misses me and my presence in the house. My dad was the only North Sider I found any reason to be there for and sometimes I wish he would just move over here with me. I wish we could be South Siders and be together and stop all of... this.

But no. He would get along here just as much as Archie would, if for different reasons. He was too warm and caring and gentle and calm. Too soft. He was a North Sider.

I found myself in the middle of the road in some distant corner of the South Side, by myself. In the most danger. What was I? A person who was neither North nor South Side. A person who's father was lenient and willing and patient but who wouldn't wait forever. Maybe he secretly liked me out of the house. I was loud and hot headed and rebellious and got into arguments with Archie constantly. He had enough problems with one kid, but two?

Sinking into a crouch, I took a deep inhale in and tried to think, hands raising to cover my face. I froze, trying to make sense of what was happening; what I was feeling and thinking. Why was it on the one time we had a chance to be free of the Black Hood, FP was suddenly in dire need of assistance? What was the point of giving us 48 hours if he believed we were all sinners? To prove a point? To give himself rationalization? To recharge himself with reason by proving to himself once again why we deserved the punishments he found fitting for us? Was he just tired and wanted to see if we would let him stop? Give up?

Was he human and tired and remorseful? Or was he vengeful and smug, driving us to our limit to prove a point and make us see how right he was? If he was playing mind games, it was working. Or maybe I was just thinking too much.

"Hey there Little Lady."

Shit. I forced myself to my feet, looking toward the voice who was approaching me. I relaxed instantly when I recognized the Serpent jacket and the ratty hair. "Tall Boy," I greeted, smiling softly. "What are you... doing?" My light hearted questioned turned dark when I noticed the other Serpents with him, all thick and built. All angry, their faces twisted and bitter. I could't even dream of taking on ONE of these guys. A half of one. But all of them? I counted. Seven in total, including Tall Boy,  circling me like vultures going after dying prey. Like lions staring down their next meal.

Tall Boy tilted his head. "You know, me and my boys have been thinking. We don't want you around here. But you're stubborn on not leaving, and now you have these boys so attached and wrapped around your finger that the only way to get rid of you..." He cracked his knuckles by putting his fist in his other hand and squeezing. I swallowed.

He stepped forward and I went into fight mode, unable to run. "Speaking of said boys who are attached to me, you don't think Jughead and Sweet Pea will be on your ass like white on rice if it gets out that you hurt me?"

Tall Boy smirked. "You may stand up tall to a Serpent and not be scared, but you forget Serpent law. We can't hurt one of our own." I swallowed as he approached me but solidified my body, staring him down. "You're not gonna beg?" He asked mockingly.

My glare hardened. "I don't beg. If you're going to kill me, you're going to look in my eyes when you do it. You're going to see the light leave and the life drain away and you're going to know that you and six big boys found pleasure and power in ripping apart a fifteen year old girl while calling themselves men. You don't scare me, Tall Boy, because I know that even though I'm not stronger than you, I AM better than you. No matter what colors or symbols we wear or what side of Riverdale we come from. Not because I'm North Side," I added as he opened his mouth with confidence that made me seethe. "But because I wouldn't raise a hand to hurt a South Sider- even if I could take you on. Not even to save my life." Tall Boy, obviously shocked by my strength and unspoken accusation, paused. I saw his weak moment and stepped forward until we were maybe an inch apart. I had to look up at him but he had been stopped dead in his tracks. “Look in my eyes while you kill me, Coward,” I growled.

When I saw him refuse to move, I turned away from him. “Don’t turn your back to an enemy,” he grumbled.

I smiled, not turning back. “YOU decide if we’re enemies, Tall Boy. You don’t scare me. Do you have the guts to kill me? Are you such a coward you can’t even look me in the eyes when you do it? Do I have to be disarmed AND smaller than you AND have my back turned? And do you really need ALL THESE GUYS to help you do it?” I met each and every pair of eyes that belonged to my would-be attackers as I spoke and one by one, they all looked away. I laughed when I finished speaking. “If I didn’t know better I’d say you were scared of me.” I turned to face him now.

But, classic Andrews, I’d said the wrong thing. We locked eyes and he suddenly charged me, fingers wrapping around my throat. I felt my air pipe squeeze shut and I choked as I tried to get to air, my eyes watering and widening as I curled my fingers into claws, digging against Tall Boy’s hands to get to air. My feet swung and I finally landed a kick in his groin, but it wasn’t enough. The world was already full of black spots and he only grunted and squeezed me tighter. My eyes leveled on Tall Boy’s, who’s eyes were on me even as his lips quivered. I saw the hurt and the pain in his eyes and despite being in my last moments, I went limp and accepted my death. I saw a little boy fighting some pain he wouldn’t let go of, and I wasn’t afraid of him.

Death might not be so bad. I wouldn’t have to deal with the Black Hood anymore. I wouldn’t have to pick a side. Archie would have an actual reason to hate the Serpents. Oh poor Sweet Pea. Jughead and I’s last words had been hateful and malicious. I wondered if he would regret them. If Archie and my father would appreciate each other more. If... If...

My brain went fuzzy and I struggled to keep my eyes open as the world began to loose color, falling into different shades of gray as it fell away into nothing...

And then I really was falling. Air rushed back into my lungs just to have my body slam into the ground and have it knocked out of me again. I lay there, blinking slowly and mostly paralyzed as my brain screamed of nothing but air. My ears were ringing as I allowed my eyes to finally close. The world was still colored in gray and my body felt so heavy. My ears were more throbbing than ringing now and I could hear voices, but they were too far away to make out. Warm and distant and welcoming, like sunlight at the end of a cold, dark tunnel. Not yet reaching me but tantalizing in his promise If I would just... keep... going...

“Y/n! Keep breathing.” I was on my back, a pressure against my chest. Then a warmth on my mouth and air was surging into my lungs again. I hadn’t realized I still wasn’t breathing. “Come on, Y/n. Come on!”

“Oh my god...”

Suddenly something in my body clicked and I curled away from the person trying to revive me, turning on my stomach. Now I was breathing on my own. Sort of. I was gasping, curling in on myself with my face in the ground. It turned bad when all I was inhaling was dirt and ended up coughing with a raw throat that seared and burned in protest.

When it all finally faded and I rasped breath after breath, my body relaxed only to be scooped up again. Someone was crying. My hand rose to find them through touch as my vision found color and shape again. Hair. I was touching hair, soft and messy. A little dirty too, like the dirt that was now in my lungs. I rested my weak hand against the back of the person’s neck. “Sweet...” I rasped. I winced as the pain returned.

“It’s me. I’m right here.” He was holding me. I curled into him, taking comfort from his familiar warmth and smell and touch. His voice was wet and thick with emotion and it made me want to comfort him. He had to smile again. He wasn’t allowed to be sad. This world could taste my knuckles if it thought otherwise.

I smiled. “Guess I need to learn to fight,” I whispered, wincing again.

Sweet Pea laughed but it sounded broken up and messy, like maybe he was half crying too. “You’re insane.”

A new voice joined the conversation. “Let’s get her home, Sweet Pea. She needs water.” He must have agreed because he was suddenly scooping me up, holding me in his arms as he walked. “We’ll be right behind you.”

“Okay. I’m going to take her to my place.”

“Where else would you take her? I said home, right?”

There was a pause and then we were walking. He was walking, holding me. “Hold on, Princess,” he whispered. His lips pressed against my forehead and I relaxed, closing my eyes and allowing myself to just be still and quiet and listen to his heartbeat. “We’ll be home soon.”

-

When the pain and dreariness and headache went away, the world’s color and clarity came back but all I could feel was a strong need for alcohol. “Please,” I groaned as I looked at Sweet Pea.

“Your throat is all kinds of messed up, trust me, you want soda.” It wasn’t like I was an alcoholic, but I had drunk it once and the light easy going feeling was what I was craving right now. I glared at him and he glared right back. “I’ll get you alcohol when you let me go beat the shit out of Tall Boy.”

Immediately we switched placed. “Sweets, no.” He rose his eyebrows and I sighed. “Look, he didn’t kill me-“

“He tried to!” Toni accused from the entrance into the kitchen. Sweet Pea motioned to her, silently using her word as an enunciation to his own points.

I sighed. “Serpent law says you can’t hurt one of your own.”

“Well he broke the law first,” Fangs snapped. “Once you break Serpent law you’re not a Serpent anymore. That’s why we don’t break the laws.”

My eyes lowered to my hands. “But he didn’t break Serpent law.” My three friends looked at me, about to be offended before they saw the hurt on my face and realized this wasn’t about me rejecting them but about me feeling rejected by them. The air in the room changed to one of defense but I spoke before they could. “Cause I’m not a Serpent. I’m not. And even if I put on the jacket and get the tattoo and do the dance, I won’t be a Serpent. No one will look at me or treat me like a Serpent- I will ALWAYS be a North Sider.” Jughead's words came back to me. Even he thought so, deep down.

Sweet Pea sat next to me, taking my hands in his and drawing our eyes to meet. Mine were watery and he kissed my knuckles. “Y/n... What we saw today. You standing up to Tall Boy with the courage of a man three times your size. It was amazing. The way you stood up to him and called him on his bullshit. You’ve shown the heart of a Serpent. And when you stood against your brother when the chance came. When you turned to trust us that first night without reason or logic, refusing to go back home because you were horrified of what he’d done. When you spoke against him for us later, standing up for us and choosing up. You showed the loyalty of a Serpent. You look and sound and act like a Serpent and you’re... you’ve got family in the Serpents already. Toni.” She smiled at me as I looked over at her. “Fangs too.” He poked his head up as he paced behind Toni, in the next room. He nodded at me as we made eye contact. When I looked back at Sweet Pea, his smile softened. “Me.” I swallowed, finding myself blushing. “And Jones too.” My eyes fell again and he sighed. “Despite what he said, he sees you as family. That’s why he trusts you. Came to you and asked you for help. He didn’t come to any of us. He went to you and then he went to your dick of a brother.” That made me chuckle. “Unlike you. When Jughead screamed at you, you could have run home. But you didn’t. Because your home is here. When you brought other people to Tall Boy's attwntion, you could have threatened Archie, or your dad. Or the entire North Side- all which would have happened. He would have started a war with the North Side. Killing one of the few people they knew and at all trusted, who was also pro-South Side? They would have eaten that UP and we would have been totally screwed. It was perfect reasoning and even Tall Boy would have had to acknowledge it. But that’s not what you thought of in that moment. You thought of Jughead. You thought of me.” He went quiet and my eyes watered again. This time the tears fell and he pulled me into a hug. “You’re a Serpent, Y/n. You just need the jacket.”

I smiled. “I would like that. Yeah.”

He leaned away, suddenly a new light in his eyes and a smile on his face. “Wait really? You want to make it official?” Fangs pushed past Toni and they both entered the room more, equally as excited.

I laughed, a weight lifted off my chest finally. “Yeah. I want to make it official.”

Sweet Pea looked about ready to kiss me and I felt my heart explode in my chest as he leaned forward. But Toni got overexcited and rushed over to us, Fangs shooting into action as he followed right behind her. She tackled me in a behind hug, both of us breaking into loud laughter. “OH MY GOSH YES! We finally get to be real sisters.”

Fangs placed his hand on my head, ruffling my hair a bit since I was out of reach to hug. “It’s gonna be good to add you to the family.” After a second he added, “Don’t worry Sweet Pea she won’t be your sister. That would be weird.” He and Toni cracked up even harder as Sweet Pea and I both exploded with blushes, eyes wide and gazes avoiding each other’s.

This was going to be fun.

-

“Are you sure about this?” Toni asked, her face worried. My eyes peeled away from the pole and I smiled, nodding. She pulled me into a hug. “You’re going to be great. And Sweet Pea and Fangs are in the crowd ready to beat the hell out of any pervs. More than I had.”

My heart grew heavy. “I hate this,” I whispered.

She leaned away, sighed. “Me too. One day we’ll get it changed. But, for now, if you want to be a Serpent...”

“I do the dance,” I finished, nodding. “Okay.” She pat me on the back and I took a breath, entering the stage. The music started and silence hit the crowd. Everyone knew my dance was tonight. Every single Serpent knew about what the bruises on my neck meant and how far I had come. Not a single Serpent didn’t know every detail of the story of me versus Archie and me versus Tall Boy. From what I heard, everyone was keen to the idea of me joining the group. But that was just from what I’d heard from people who were very willing and capable of hiding any negative talk.

I felt eyes on me and turned to look at Sweet Pea, finding him past the lights and in the crowd of people. Everyone else was faceless as I focused on him, taking a breath. He wasn’t looking at me and I was half grateful for him being a gentleman and half irritated because I wanted to see him. I wanted to see his reaction as much as I wanted his reassuring smile.

The moment passed and I grabbed the pole, beginning to move. This wasn’t the time to hold back. At first I tried to pretend no one was there but that didn’t work. I could smell them and hear them shuffling around - I KNEW they were there. It was when the chorus of Nick Jonas’ “Right Now” hit the chorus that I let go of my fear. In my mind I mad these people as threatening as Tall Boy and as arrogant as my brother. The two moments that I had claimed confidence I honed again. I managed a smirk, feeling the music and moving my body to it. It was so much easier than I thought it would be once I just stopped caring.

Right now, you know I want your body, so I won’t kiss nobody until you come back home.

And I swear, the next time that I hold you, I won’t let you go nowhere, you’ll never be alone.

I’ll never let you go.

Towards the end of the song is when Sweet Pea’s self control broke. He looked over and our eyes locked and I smirked wider, putting on a bit of a show at this point. I dropped my butt so I was sort of crouched down but lower, grabbing the pole and pulling myself up the pole again. My head tilted back, hair dangling. When I looked over, Sweet Pea swallowed, wide eyes ripping away from me as his face light up red.

I tried not to feel good about myself.

The song ended and I ran a hand through my hair, bending down to scoop up my shirt and skirt where I’d throw them when I’d stripped them off earlier. Then I made my way delicately off the stage. The second I was off the stage, the lights off and the music gone, I froze, eyes wide.

What had I just done?

Toni looked as shocked as I felt. “Holy crap girl, you have MOVES!” I blushed, raising my hand to rub the back of my neck. She nudged me and we both laughed.

I wrapped my arms around myself, suddenly very self conscious in just my underwear. It was a relief when I felt a jacket go around my shoulders. “Here.” I looked over to see Sweet Pea. He’d given his Serpents jacket to me. I hadn’t worn it since that first night. This time it felt just as comfortable, but it also felt fitting. I couldn’t believe that... that I...

“Does this mean I’m... I’m official?”

“You just need the accessories,” Toni joked, wiggling her eyebrows.

I felt eyes on me and pulled the jacket tighter around me. Sweet Pea felt my discomfort and stepped up next to me, putting his arm around my shoulders. “Let’s get you home,” he declared. “We’ll worry about the rest tomorrow, yeah?” I nodded and Fangs and Toni waved to me as we left, Sweet Pea doing his best to block my body from everyone else. Once outside I paused to pull on my shirt and skirt again and he looked away as I took the few seconds. Once I was done he gave his jacket back to me and I grinned, thanking him. He smiled, nodding. We then moved to his bike, me clambering on the back after he started it.

My arms went around his waist and I pressed my cheek against his back. He breathed purposefully, relaxing more the further we got away from the Wyrm. When we got to his trailer, he lead me inside with a hand on my back. I got excited think things might finally change between us. Maybe he’d kiss me. Or... Or maybe he’d...

Despite where my brain was going, he immediately moved to the couch after giving me a kiss on the cheek. “Goodnight. You did well tonight.”

I stood there, frowning. After a second, he looked over at me, confused as to why I was there. “That’s it?” I asked. He stood to his full height, his hands moving to his waist. He looked like a mom scolding her child, eyebrow raised and head tilted.

He smiled a bit, letting me know he knew exactly what I was thinking. He moved to me slowly and I backed up against the wall but he just kept coming until our lips were millimeters apart, our breath mixing in the air. “Is this what you want?” Suddenly my heart was racing and I swallowed. I shuddered as his traced down my arm. He leaned away, chuckling. “Didn’t think so.”

I glared. “I just thought-“

He shot me a look. “That we were going to have sex? I have self control, Y/n, and you are not ready. I’m not ready for that, with you. We’re not there yet.”

I opened my lips to argue. “I-“ But then I stopped. “Yet?” He suddenly wouldn’t look at me. I chuckled, moving to his side. “I just want to kiss you, honestly. I was hoping I could at least do that.”

He met my eyes and suddenly pulled me close, his arms wrapping around my waist. I grinned, my hands moving to the back of his neck. “Do you know how badly I’ve wanted to kiss you?” My breath caught. His forehead rested on mine, my eyes fluttering shut when he leaned forward. I tilted my head back so that our noses brushed, lips ghosting. “I’ve wanted to kiss you so badly,” he mumbled and we were so close I could feel the movement.

I swallowed. “Then kiss me.” Every word was felt, our lips touching just enough. Then he closed the gap - as small as it was - and we were kissing. He pulled me tighter against him and I inhaled sharply through my nose, my hands slipping into his hair, tugging. He stepped forward, a little clumsy. He found the wall and pressed me against it. It felt so good to have him so close. We got lost in each other. We parted a second to catch our breaths just to dive right back into the kiss. We kissed again and again until the room seemed to grow much hotter than it had been. His hand moved to my waist, finger tips slipping under my shirt. I gasped.

He pulled away fully, blinking his eyes. “Sorry,” he grunted.

“It- it’s- you’re fine,” I stumbled to reassure.

He looked at me, chuckling as he shook his head. “No it’s not. I said we’re not ready because we’re not. You’re just...” He reached up, the side of his fingers tapping my chin. “So hard to resist.” I blushed and he kissed me again, this time short and sweet. He went to move away. “Goodnight Y/n.”

I caught his wrist. “Sleep with me.” He glared and I shook my head. “No I mean, JUST sleep.” I laughed and he relaxed, actually smiling. He sighed, pausing to think. I moved toward the bedroom, tugging him after me.

He laughed. “Okay, okay. The couch was giving me neck cramps anyway.”

That night I fell asleep wrapped in his arms, his kiss still warm in memory on my lips. So we failed the 48 hour dare and the Black Hood was waiting for us tomorrow. Tonight? Tonight I slept with not a single worry, warm and in the arms of the boy I was falling for. The boy that was falling for me. Everything else could wait for tomorrow.

-

Forever Tag: @bitchyseawitch @chipster-21 @alexa-playafricabytoto

Story Tag List: @reblogserpent

[randomscenariosandwritings]

The Stars and the Sand

~The Stars and the Sand~Nct!Soulmate Au Part 2

Parts out --> Part 1//Part 1.5//Thanksgiving Special//Part 2 (Congratulations you are here!!)//Part 2.5// Part 3 No links for now cause I'm lazy...

A/N Yes you read that right, finally a real part 2 instead of just little extras and bonuses. Fair warning this might be awful I have no real idea and I’m once again too lazy to properly edit this or edit it at all so there’s probably a ton of errors and it probably sucks but here it is anyway cause if I don’t post it now I might not ever! Either way, I hope you enjoy this part 2! One more thing before I actually get into it I’m a jerk who totally lied to you! I promised you’d find out his name in part 2, but I decided it would be better if you didn’t learn his name until they met, also because I just really love seeing all your guesses and letting you get involved in this...if you’re really pissed and you message me in private I might share the answer with you, but I’d really like to continue to keep it a secret because it’ll work better this way. So you’ll for sure find out in the next part cause that one will be the last part unless you guys want some extreme drama and angst type stuff to go down...let me know if you do and I’ll make it happen, if not next part will be the last one. Also feel free to just comment and talk to me I love hearing from you even if you don’t like something I did in the story feedback is appreciated and it’s nice just to know that people are reading this and have things to say, that being said if you’re just gonna cuss me out and complain and say you hate it without saying why please just don't share I'm not gonna take unjustified hate it's rude and cruel, if you have justification let me know and we can have a civil discussion but please don't just scream at me and not tell me why I suck.

Description: He was the sun and she was the moon and they were soulmates. Which was both a blessing and a curse. She needed his light and warmth and he needed her to reflect it back to him, but they were ever so distant, both unable to truly reach each other. He reached out for her every way he could, but only in his darkest moments could she ever be found.

Genre: Same as the last few parts angst and fluff, lots of fluff this time around some really crappy angst near the end I don’t know this whole post is probably crap but oh well

Warnings: Cursing, panic attack, mentions of suicide, alcohol, abandonment that’s it I think...

Word count: 4161 words

(Not my gif once again, what a surprise, but it’s super cute so major props to the creator all credit to them and their amazing art) Also bold is written, italicized are thought/dreamt

She stood at the foot of a wide staircase looking up. She wore a delicate ballgown and silver heels, diamonds dripped off of her from her ears, her neck, her wrists, and fingers. She was looking up, looking up at him, the shadowy figure at the top of the stairs, a silhouette, her view blinded by the lights shining brightly behind him from the very lively ballroom full of people, an audience he was disappointing by disappearing to chase her down. The lights framed him like a golden halo, a sign that he was from the heavens and her from the Earth below. She couldn't see his eyes, but she knew they were locked with her own and were transfixed on her whether that was out of shock and wonder or disgust or hurt and betrayal she knew not, all she knew was he was frozen at the top of the stairs looking down and she was stuck at the bottom looking up. Ultimately it was her who broke from this spell that kept them stuck in place and she turned and ran towards the woods, but as she left him behind she heard his voice echo in her head "I'll find you again, my dear cinnamon, I will. I swear it to you on all the stars and every piece of sand." It was the last thing she heard before morning brought her back to her senses, and the first thing that day that tipped her off to the fact that she may be falling for the boy she swore she’d never love.

It was still early in the morning when she rose from her bed and began the trek downstairs to make breakfast for herself, Taeyong, and their Aunt. Jinki and Soonkyu were never home these days and so she had simply stopped making them breakfast. She trudged down the stairs all the while cursing the game of checkers that had spelled her doom and forced this early morning on her when she lost to Taeyong yet again. She was beginning to think she was just bad at games... Either way there she was standing in the kitchen over a frying pan when the first message of the day from her soulmate appeared on her skin, "Hello, cinnamon!! I hope you have a great day, cause I know I will (how can I not when you're my soulmate), if your day starts going bad remember there are more reasons to smile than pieces of sand in the world, and though most of them revolve around you there are other reasons made just to see your beautiful smile, love you!!" She smiled fondly at the sweet and loving words written on her skin in red ink. 

She was still smiling and humming lightly to herself when Taeyong emerged from his room and entered the kitchen. "I've never seen you this happy to make breakfast, so imposter answer me this, who are you and what have you done with my baby sister?" Taeyong asked as he sat down on one of the stools behind the counter. 

"What's wrong with being happy, Tae?" She questioned giving him a quizzical look when he didn't respond she explained slightly, "There's just a lot of reasons to smile, more in fact than pieces of sand on Earth," She said but he was still very confused, so he stared at her like she'd lost her mind until she began to dish up the food and he became too distracted to care. Then she went to go wake her aunt and it was on their return to the kitchen that her aunt told her something that had her reeling and confused the rest of the day.

He woke up after a very restful sleep and for once truly enjoyed, truly loved the sun, it's greeting, and its companionship. Sure, he had always preferred sunny weather, but he'd never truly loved the sun with complete sincerity until today. So, it was the sun and his new found appreciation for it, no, his newfound understanding that inspired him to do what he did that day, though it had truly begun with sand and the color red. He'd woken up to soft fingers of light on his cheek and light dancing across the now smudged drawings from the day before, flowers and stars, the moon and the sea fuzzy and hazy from both his sleepy eyes and time, wear and tear applied to even the most beautiful things. The light had illuminated these beautiful scenes that screamed to the world no matter how broken we both are no matter how distant we are still beautiful, the world is still beautiful and we are inseparable in ways that not even the sun and the moon could understand. He and the sun had truly become one that morning when he woke up and once again saw the world as beautiful when he woke up and smiled at the pot of flowers on his windowsill and at the trees outside and the birds amongst its leaves singing loudly. Most of all though, it was because he loved the moon, he shined for her and told her she was beautiful, he illuminated her and taught her to shine, to love her own skin, she had grown up knowing and believing she was beautiful because he told her she was with the drawings he covered her with. He reminded her of the beauty and that was the suns role. It may be warm, it may be destructive, but it was also a light giver, a life giver, an illuminator, a seer of beauty, an appreciator of art, a witness to the extravagance and brilliance of life, and a general life enthusiast who gave his everything to everything he did. Today he would share that light and he would show her even more beautiful things and then he would tell her what was most beautiful. 

That morning after telling her there were many reasons to smile, he began to tell her what they were and just like his mornings his list began with morning coffee the soothing warm liquid that woke him up and gave him energy, a life giver of its own sort, perhaps just a simple falsehood, but that didn't make it's presence in his life any less sweet and good. He found the next items on his list when his neighbor's little sister showed up at his door with her hair pulled up an apron on and flour on her face.

"Write your mom a note, you're coming over for breakfast," She said quickly shoving him towards the kitchen to write said note.

"Nuh-uh, I am making my mom some breakfast and then I'll join you," He replied and she sighed before waving her arm at him and letting him begin.

While he cooked she wrote a note to his mom and once both were complete they left together and walked over to her house. There he found a pile of chocolate chip pancakes waiting for him and the two siblings. Several bowls of toppings were scattered on the counter as well, none of them healthy other than the bananas and strawberries but that was to be expected from the two siblings, one a college student and the other a high school senior just about to graduate and join the two boys in university. Taeil did usually remain on the healthier side but they had a cheat day once a week where his little sister was entirely in charge of deciding what they ate and when, it was his way of making sure her voice was always heard, and today was very clearly that day.  

After eating and laughing over stacks of chocolate chip pancakes with some of his favorite people in the world, he was very aware of what the next two things he'd write to her would be. It was very obviously chocolate chip pancakes and friends who are like family or family that are your friends. A little while later these same siblings gave him the next thing he'd write to her too.

She knew she was in trouble as soon as the fourth thing appeared on her arm, yes everything else he'd written had been cute and sweet and lovely and made her smile, but this fourth thing only made it more obvious to her that he was meant for her and she knew there was no way she would be able to avoid falling in love with him, not when he gave her more reasons to smile than there were stars in the sky. 

She had burst out laughing when the fourth thing had appeared on her skin in orange ink and promptly squealed about it only moments later, though it wasn't really anything to squeal over it was weird and funny and charming and darling and adorable and oh god how she loved it, oh how it made her smile. This, of course, gained Taeyong's attention especially since he was seated on the floor in front of her position on the couch and she was very loud...and also nearly kicked him in the head. "What did he say now?" Taeyong asked pushing her into a sitting position and joining her on the couch. She didn't answer just smiled. So, he took her arm and searched for new writing and found it there on her wrist in orange. "You're going to think this is really dumb, but my neighbors have a pair of salt and pepper shakers that are shaped like dinosaurs and I thought it was really funny..." Taeyong read aloud before fixing his sister with a look of annoyance, it was one of those done parent looks that each of them saw many parents and older siblings give out, not that their own mother had ever given it to either of them nor had either of their siblings, Jinki had been too depressed after his soulmate's tragic end and Soonkyu hadn't been home since she left on her honeymoon and she'd always been so kind and loving and supportive until then. She'd been 100% smiles until she was abandoned at a train station. The first time they ever heard her cry was over the phone when she told them what had happened. "Only you would find that so adorable, I'm serious you're meant to be," Taeyong said reigning in his thoughts before they went too far down the rabbit hole. This was one wonderland he didn't want to experience. 

His little sister just stuck out her tongue and then shoved him off the couch. No other response other than those two actions to his words. He sighed as soon as he hit the ground and then decided to be a little drama queen, at least that's what his baby sister would have said if you asked her to explain what happened next. 

"How dare you?!" He called out in quite the dramatic fashion, flinging his arms around and throwing one over his eyes before continuing, "I trusted you, I loved you," He exclaimed slightly being very over dramatic about his slight fall to the ground. "I can't believe it, my own sister...my killer..." He mused before feigning a dramatic death scene. She laughed softly at her older brother and he shot up into a sitting position. "Don't laugh this is a serious moment, I've just died! What kind of sister are you?" He questioned acting all hurt and then promptly returning to his "dead" position. She stifled back the laugh that was rising in her throat and decided to join his antics. 

"Oh no! Taeyong! What have I done! I never meant to kill you!" She said throwing an arm over her eyes in a dramatic fashion and pausing on the couch for a moment before coming to kneel beside him, who was now the one trying to hide his laughter. "Can you forgive me?" She pleaded in a very obviously fake and overdramatic voice. Then a moment of silence before they both burst out laughing loudly. They were consumed by the best kind of laughter, the uncontrollable, unceasing, and extremely loud laughter that shook you and made you cry and caused your side to ache and that only subsided after a soft fade to silence as you wiped your eyes and clutched your side. "I love my brother," she thought softly to herself, but her soulmate heard her and smiled gently at her kind words and the way she said them and that was how he found the fifth item for his list, a family that loves you. It wasn't long before that too was written on her skin in green ink. She smiled at that one too, especially the little pink heart drawn next to it. 

It was in that moment that she remembered the words of her aunt, the words that had never truly left her today, they'd been lingering all day and leaving her with only questions and no answers. 

"Love him while you can," Her aunt had told her when she'd woken her up and her aunt had seen the words on her skin in various colors, only two at the time, but enough for her aunt to feel the need to tell her this. The words had surprised her especially coming from the aunt who had cursed love and soulmates for as long as she'd known her, the aunt who fell into drunken stupors every night and woke with hangovers every morning. She'd wanted to ask how her aunt could say that when every other moment she preached against love and it's poisonous claws, but they had made it downstairs too fast and there was no chance.

After these five things alone she knew she did love him, but even then she was still terrified, because her aunts comment had not told her that the love would last nor that it would be good just that she should love him, and she still saw her aunt pick up the bottle later that day when she and Taeyong had plopped down in front of the tv to watch a drama they were both highly invested in. Still heard the muttered curses against love and the man who had left her. So she was left to wonder why should she love if one day she too would be cursed to wander halls like a ghost and know a life of liquor and anger and nothing more? What was the point of love if all it did was hurt? 

Yet, she couldn't help but love the boy who wrote things like, I saw a squirrel today it stared at me for like ten seconds, so basically I won a staring contest with a squirrel, my neighbor's sister is belting out Fantastic Baby really loud and headbanging and it's highly amusing, there are really pretty flowers in my neighbors' yard and my yard too by the way, or there was a really cute puppy on a walk today and I think puppies existing at all is a reason to smile, we don't deserve dogs. She loved the boy who found all the possible reasons to smile in all the littlest things. 

She fell asleep reading all the reasons to smile and he fell asleep with a silver pen in hand ready to write yet another reason to smile. Neither of them expected to be waking up a few hours later in such complete panic and terror.

She was on the floor sobbing and shaking and in the middle of a panic attack when she heard his voice in her head singing to her softly and saw more writing appearing on her arms, writing she couldn't read through the tears and the shaking and the fear. 

He woke up to curse words, a panicked voice, and jumbled thoughts streaming through his head erratically in her voice, once lyrical and beautiful now panicked, strung out, and thin. He felt her panic in his mind and for a moment almost began to panic himself before realizing that wouldn't help her. So he sang her a song, the very song her favorite quote and drawing were inspired by (It's Miracle, specifically the NCT Dream cover if you're curious, it might also contain a hint as to who her soulmate is ;) ). He wrote words to her carefully and calmly and prayed she would be able to read them all the while still singing to her. "I love you," He wrote "You're beautiful," "Look at the moon, find it and know I'm looking at it too and I'm here," "The moon knows you well, I tell the moon all about you at night, it'll watch over you tonight since I can't," "Believe me if I were with you I'd hold you in my arms and make you hot cocoa and make sure you felt safe and loved," He wrote so many different things trying to get her to see them, trying to calm her with soothing words of love and when his song finished he sang another and another until her jumbled thoughts latched onto the words and started thinking them back to him, she was beginning to calm and as she calmed so did he. 

"Did you mean everything you wrote?" She asked when her thoughts were finally her own again and not that panicked mess of pain and hopelessness and she had read everything he'd written on their shared skin. 

"I did," He responded gently and began to draw a little flower on his skin. "I do love you and even though I haven't seen you I know you're beautiful, I stare at the moon all the time and I tell the moon about you every night except for tonight cause I was too busy writing to you, I sure would've done anything to help you if I were there," He concluded and only silence greeted him for a minute.

"I'm sorry about that, I must have woken you up," She said after a moment and he sighed softly.

"You don't have to apologize, you don't choose when you have a panic attack," He replied shaking his head and continuing to draw flowers and hearts on his skin. "If you don't mind me asking, was there a cause or did it just happen?" 

"They're usually unexpected, just kind of come whenever, but this time it was a nightmare, I was falling," She replied too shaken to bother lying, plus she just needed to talk to someone and there was no way she'd be bothering Taeyong when she'd heard him crying to himself earlier and she knew he needed sleep. They could comfort each other in the morning but for now, she needed someone to talk, to listen, to be present.

"Do you fear falling?" He questioned, trying to better understand his soulmate, the female voice in his head, the soft handwriting he'd seen only a few times.

“No, it just brings back a time when I watched someone I cared about fall from a very high height," She replied softly careful about what she said not yet wanting to tell him everything, but if he asked she'd share.

"How often do you have them?" He asked swaying the topics, he'd felt her apprehension, her desire not to tell him, but her willingness to tell him if he asked, he wouldn't ask if only to give her what she truly wanted.

"Pretty often, often enough that we moved all the way out here so I could actually attend university, frequent enough that I can't stay in a dorm," She answered pretending it didn't bother her, but he saw right through it and knew she wanted desperately to just lead a normal life, she wanted to not fear having a soulmate, she wanted to love and be loved without fear, she wanted to trust people, live in dorms, and not have panic attacks but something long ago had changed everything for her. He wanted to know what it was but if she wasn't ready he wouldn't push it. "It's gotten better though, I used to not be able to sleep at all, then I could sleep only a little, then they were everyday, now they're frequent but not nearly that often," She explained trying to comfort him before letting out a sigh and deciding it was time he knew. "It's why I wanted to ignore you," She said softly.

"Because you have panic attacks?" He questioned seeking clarification for her words. 

"No, because of the event that caused the panic attacks," She responded and then sucked in a shaky breath, "I watched my mother swan dive off a roof because my father, her soulmate had left her, my family is cursed when it comes to soulmates," She concluded and he nodded silently in understanding, it only made him love her more, no that was a lie, it only made him realize how much he loved her when his heart broke at her tender, vulnerable, and entirely true words.

"I can stop if you want, if I make it worse, if I'm hurting you I can stop," He said softly after a moments pause, he would rather never write to her again, rather ignore her than hurt her any more than he might have already. 

"Please don't stop," She replied softly, "I m getting better because of you, it's nice to have someone to talk to all the time, someone who cares, it's nice to be loved by more than just my brother and a few friends," She continued knowing that as much as her aunt said she loved her she didn't, you can't love someone if you spend 95% of your time incapable of comprehensible thoughts, and as much as her eldest siblings would tell her they loved her when they were still around you don't just abandon people you love as they had, you don't leave and never come back and you certainly don't ingrain fear into every fiber of their being just because life has hurt you. Taeyong, Chenle, Renjun, and Jeno were the only ones who loved her so totally beside her unknown soulmate. He heard these thoughts too and nearly screamed when he heard Chenle's name run through his head, she was that close and yet she was so far away.

"Cinnamon," He began slowly bringing her attention back to his familiar voice. "I wish I could send you a bouquet of flowers, my neighbor has a whole section of books in his library about the language of flowers so I'd get him to help me, but if I remember right I already know what flowers I'd put in it, I'd put bluebells, dahlias, forget-me-nots, and peach blossoms into a bouquet and give it to you if only I could find you," He told her, what he didn't tell her was what it was he thought those flowers meant, he also didn't tell her that Chenle's soulmate was his neighbor's sister, the very one that had made him come over for pancakes dusted in flour and messy with the efforts of cooking. He didn't tell her that even if he hadn't met her he saw her in the stars in the sky every time he looked out his window at night, didn't tell her that he loved her with more love than the vast expanse of the universe, didn't tell her that if they got a second together for every grain of sand in the world or every star in the entire unending galaxies and universes that still wouldn't be enough time. He didn't tell her that he'd never leave her, because he knew she wouldn't believe him and it would just hurt her if she thought he was making a false promise just to make her feel better. So he stuck with just wishing he could buy her a bouquet and she heard none of these other secrets. Knew none of the promises he'd made to both of them in his heart. 

"I'd buy you coffee," She replied after a moment of silence between them, "there's a cafe near my house, I'd take you there and buy you a cup of coffee," She continued and the weight of what she'd just said made him weightless. That was the night he learned that the best conversations were held under the stars after a day of counting grains of sand. Nothing had ever mattered to him more than the simple words I'd buy you coffee in that specific moment. In any other moment those words would have had very little significance, but at this moment, in her voice in his head, in this way they meant everything. Context truly was everything and that night everything changed and nothing could ever be the same. Nothing could ever go back to the way it had been there would be no hope of her ever being able to ignore him ever again. Their worlds had shifted, the tides had shifted, and that single moment was the beginning and end of everything they'd ever known.

(Not my gif again, still not a surprise, credit it to whoever made this gem)

A/N hope you liked it, you probably didn’t but yay to anyone who did! Like and comment and tell me what you thought, honestly just talk to me, it doesn’t even have to be about the story, I just like hearing from all of you!

~Bonus for whoever made it here (Not any story just an extra little tidbit because I’m extra)~

Meaning of flowers (cause I'm extra af and put way too much thought into this story that like 5 people will probably enjoy): blue bells= humility, and constancy, depict devotion towards loved one; I will be constant; also, everlasting love, dahlias= positive changes, commitment, honesty, everlasting commitment; forever thine, forget-me-nots= true love, remembrance, fidelity, long-lasting connection, peach blossoms= this heart is thine; I am your captive; I am yours

[cuddlycap]

Snow (Loki x Reader)

A/N: This is the first of what will probably be a little winter collection, so stay tuned for more or request one of your own! (gif not mine)

Warnings: none really

Words: 1,633

Your eyes flickered back and forth between the wide widows on the walls of the Avenger’s facility and the ground to make sure you didn’t stumble over your snow boots as you ran for the door. In reality, your mobility was limited due to all the layers you were wearing.

This day was a long time coming, a day you had been waiting for ever since the leaves began changing color. When you saw the first few snowflakes beginning to fall from your window, you dropped everything, fearful you would miss it.

Loki was in the front room, licking a finger to turn the page in the book he was reading from his favorite chair, only to pause and raise an eyebrow as you waddled by, furious determination on your face. He only grew more bewildered as you wandered by, his presence going unnoticed due to your focus, until he spoke up.

“Is that really necessary?” You barely stopped.

“Oh yeah.” Tony spoke up from somewhere behind you; he had been following you down the hallway laughing to himself so you were sure he had been recording you to laugh about later. “The last time she was out in the snow, she caught pneumonia so bad Thor had to take her to Asgard because we were convinced she was going to keel over. Don’t you remember?”

“Yes, indeed.” Loki murmured, his eyebrows furrowed. You ignored them both, throwing the door open and passing Steve on your way, who sighed but stepped aside.

“Y/N, do you really think—”

“Yes.” You cut him off. “Please, Steve. Christmas and the winter is the one time of year that my soul comes alive, let me have this.” He gave in with a light smile, watching as you took your first step in the delicate blanket of white that was beginning to develop. You let out a giddy squeak as the white sparkles began tickling your face.

After a moment, you heard the door open and close again behind you. Standing a bit away from you was a lithe figure that you knew immediately to be Loki from the way his arms were crossed behind his back.

“Perhaps someone at such mercy of the cold shouldn’t be in it.” He spoke up, to which you scoffed.

“Well, we often love things that aren’t really the best for us, don’t we.” You shot back dryly, turning back away from his thoughtful gaze. It wasn’t until he reached your side that you realized he hadn’t gone away.

“I don’t really believe that to be so.”

“I’m not really in the debate kinda mood…” You teased him, only halfway joking as you turned your face upwards the watch the snow. “But I’m just saying, I probably like caffeine more than I should.” He chuckled a bit beside you.

“I can’t relate.”

“Yes, I know. Which is why I always take Thor with me on coffee runs.”

“I meant, the things I enjoy bring me pleasure and relief, therefore they can’t be all that bad.”

“Like what?”

“Literature, for instance. The stars at night. Watching Thor make a fool of himself.” You chuckled now, turning to look at him, feeling your heart jolt to find him smiling at you.

Loki’s presence always befuddled you. He was almost in an odd spot, where he was almost beginning to be trusted by every member of the team, enough so that he was able to go about the facility as he pleased and occasionally had pleasant moments with almost everyone. Mainly being, you.

The two of you almost fed off of the other’s quips, or energy while borrowing the same room. His attitude towards humans at first was of course unimpressed, and that included you, but one day he just started acting nicer. Decent, like asking how you were, what you were reading, what your thoughts were—and always with genuine interest most people didn’t have. Somehow, out of all your friends, he was the one that listened the most. It always seemed to be next to you where he felt most comfortable, or where he wanted to be. But maybe that was just you.

“Why are you so fascinated with the snow anyways?” He asked, lifting his hand and watched as a flake instantly dissolved.

“A lot of people here don’t really get it. I grew up where it was much warmer. I didn’t see snow for the first time until I was 18. Everyone here just kinda gets annoyed by it, but…I still get a little excited when I wake up in December and remember I actually get to enjoy a white Christmas, like the songs always talked about.” And like always, Loki was listening intently to your every word, his eyes flickering with heavy thoughtfulness. “What?”

“It always just seems to be the little things with Midgardians. That is such an…insignificant but intense love for something so trite.” You rolled your eyes.

“Sorry, I suppose it isn’t world domination.” This banter wasn’t anything new, but you were surprised when his expression fell a bit, and no quip came back.

“You know, sometimes, when you truly enjoy something, you merely have no choice but to admire it from afar.”

“And why would I do that when I can enjoy it up close and personal?” He blinked, his eyebrows furrowing as though he were stumped. You wondered why it felt as though you were speaking of different things.

“So being out here really means that much to you, that you’re willing to nearly die from it?” You giggled a little.

“Okay, I didn’t almost die, it wasn’t that bad.” His incredulous face stopped you. “Fine, maybe it was, I can’t remember. But yes. It is. Maybe that’s too sentimental for you to understand.” He merely looked up to the sky, watching the snowflakes with almost an entirely new expression.

“Perhaps.”

You didn’t get sick. There was now a running bet with the other Avengers about how many days it would take until you were. Loki was the only one who didn’t partake in it. Instead, he was out there in it, by your side. You didn’t ask why—you never made anyone feel as though their presence was ever an issue, and you wouldn’t do it to Loki either.

You would explain snow angels (“So, you roll around in the snow?”), fantasize about making a huge igloo, and throw snowballs. All the while, Loki was very attentive, as well as flabbergasted, and almost unimpressed. So much so that you wondered why he continued to come out with you every day.

“We’ll need sticks for arms. A carrot for the nose, of course. And your scarf.” The snowman the two of you were working on was nearly done, and you extended your hand expectantly. He scoffed at you.

“You can’t be serious.”

“Does it look like I’m joking? He’s going to look very dashing.” His eyes glinted a bit as a slow building smile danced on his lips.

“Does that mean you think I’m very dashing in this scarf?” If the way his smile had turned into a smirk didn’t make you so nervous, you would’ve laughed, but all you could do was swallow.

“I—uh…” you were suddenly very shy, and unable to string together a sentence. His eyes softened as he stepped closer towards you, flickering in between the both of yours with the sincere attentiveness he always gave you. “…Do you want the truth?”

“Always.” His murmur was solemn, his breath hit your face.

“I always thought scarves looked tacky.” His face fell abruptly, and he chuckled, making you laugh nervously. “…Until I saw you in one. But besides that, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you look anything other than dashing.”

It was as if your bluntness had caught him off guard—you yourself didn’t know what you were saying anymore and thankfully, your cheeks didn’t give yourself away since they were no doubt already rosy from the cold. Finally, the most tender smile graced his features and his delicate fingers cradled your face as though he was holding both something precious and a weapon all at once.

“Perhaps you are right after-all, Y/N.” Your name rolling of his tongue sounded like a poem on its own. “I am tired of admiring from afar.” Before you knew what he was doing, he leaned in and placed a sweet kiss on your lips that held you in place. After a moment, you kissed him back, smiling into the kiss and using his scarf to pull him even closer to you. Your smile grew wider as you slipped the scarf from his neck completely.

“I’m still going to need this.” You whispered against his lips, pecking him once more before taking the scarf and arranging it on the snowman. Loki chuckled, amusement twinkling in his eyes, and…adoration. It looked to be adoration, if you had to guess.

Thor was wearing a broad beam as you both entered inside where it appeared he was waiting expectantly, clasping two steaming mugs of hot chocolate. You took yours in delight at the sight of extra whipped cream, and Loki reluctantly took his, nearly spilling it on himself as Thor clapped him on the back.

“I hope when the snow melts away and the earth blooms, Loki will sit you down in a meadow and tell you about his adoration for flowers.” You smiled at Loki who was only staring with narrowed eyes at his brother. Thor put his other hand on your back a bit more gently, giving you a warm smile. “Or at least, this partnership doesn’t fade with the season. I’m rooting for it.”

“Well, fear not brother. One reason in the intimate company of our lovely Y/N wouldn’t be enough for me.” 

[still-with-hearts-beating]

if you ask, [yes] i’ll answer (jane/kurt + tasha + patterson fanfic + #bspromptchallenge)

project: @blindspothiatusproject 30 day gif/fanfic prompt challenge

day 19. men vs women/ men/women

A/N: at first this prompt was completely impossible for me. And then I loved it. Had so much fun writing this one.

 if you ask, [yes] i’ll answer

 “Remind me again why I let you two in here?” Kurt asked, rubbing the spot at the bridge of his nose where he could feel a headache brewing.

 “Because you love us,” Tasha said as she reached for the bottle of bourbon in the middle of the table. “And because we brought bourbon,” she added as she topped off all of their glasses.

It had been twenty minutes since she and Patterson had arrived unannounced at Kurt’s door and pushed their way in, sitting down at the table outside on his balcony where they waited until Kurt joined them with three glasses.

 And they had been peppering him with questions about Jane ever since.

 “Why won’t you just tell us things?” Patterson whined as she took a sip of her drink.

 “Why do you guys care so much?” he retorted, raising his eyebrows. “It’s none of your business.”

 “First of all, you made it our business two months ago when you declared your undying love for her on open comms,” Tasha said with a smirk as Kurt rolled his eyes. “And second of all, we care because we love you,” she paused, considering her next thought. “Also, because we need to look out for Jane.”

 Kurt frowned at that as he took a sip of his own drink.

 “What do you mean, look out for Jane? Look out for her from what? From me?” he asked in disbelief.

 Tasha and Patterson exchanged glances before Patterson leaned back in her seat while Tasha leaned forward.

 “In case you’ve forgotten, you have a history of being a pretty shitty boyfriend,” Tasha said, holding back her laughter as Kurt’s face turned into a combination of annoyed, irritated and offended.

 “Excuse me, I am a great boyfriend,” he insisted, waiting for one of them to chime in with approval but he was met with silence. “I am!” he insisted and they each had to stifle their giggles.

 “I think you should tell us all about what a great boyfriend you are to Jane in order to convince us,” Tasha said as she leaned back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest. “And then we can verify everything with her when she gets home from her art class.”

 Kurt raised an eyebrow at her as he looked between the two of them. He knew he shouldn’t care what they thought. There was only one person whose evaluation of his boyfriend skills he really cared about and she was not currently sitting at that table with them.

 But part of him liked that they were looking out for Jane. They were protective of her. And even though he felt fairly confident that she did not need protecting from him, he was glad to see his friends embrace her like this.

 “You have until I finish this drink to ask what you want,” he said, already shaking his head regretfully as they practically leaped out of their seats, clapping gleefully.

 “Oh my god, yay!” Patterson exclaimed, banging her hands excitedly on the table. “OK but you have to drink that normally. Slow sips. No throwing it back,” she insisted, shaking her finger at him.

 “Fine, fine, fine,” he said, waving his hand at her. “Get on with your questions.”

 “Me first, me first,” Tasha insisted, sitting forward, resting her elbows on the table. “So...,” she started, gently rapping her nails against her cheek. “Are you using protection?”

 Kurt nearly choked on his drink, coughing as he slammed the glass down on the table.

 “I’m sorry, what?! That’s what you want to know?” he asked between coughs, his eyes watering as he tried to clear his throat.

 “Well, normally I’d give you the benefit of the doubt but, as evidenced by the little surprise Weller on her way in Colorado, I can’t be sure. And I’m guessing that Sheppard probably didn’t give Jane ‘the talk’ while brainwashing her to be a terrorist so who even knows what you two are doing. Well, I think I can guess what you’re doing but how are you doing it is another question... there could be another little Weller on the way for all we know! Really, you and I should have had this discussion a while back. Maybe I should have one with Jane too...”

 “Can’t you make her stop?” Weller pleaded as he looked over at Patterson, who currently was slumped over on the table with her face buried in her arms.

 “It’s like a runaway train,” she mumbled without lifting her head.

 “I am not answering that,” Kurt said, looking back at Tasha. “Ask something else.”

 “Really, this is a pretty important topic,” she pressed on, biting back a grin at the look on Kurt’s face.

 “Natasha...” he said slowly, lowering his gaze at her. The warning tone in his voice and use of her full name were enough to tell her to move on.

 “Fine, fine...your turn,” she mumbled, elbowing Patterson who slowly lifted her head up from her arms.

 “Gee, thanks...got him nice and relaxed now,” she said sarcastically and Kurt chuckled, taking another sip of his drink as he waited for her to continue. She was quiet at first, swirling her own drink in her hand before looking up at him.

 “Are you guys moving to Colorado?” she asked quietly and Kurt paused, setting his drink down on the table. “Oh my god, you are...” she whispered when he didn’t answer right away.

 Kurt shook his head and raised his hands reassuringly.

 “We’re just talking about it,” he said. “We haven’t decided anything.”

 “But you’re thinking about it,” Tasha said and Kurt nodded. “What about Jane, what does she think about it?”

 “It’s her idea,” he said, smiling as he thought about their many conversations about it. She was emphatic about him being a father to his daughter the way he wanted to be. And insisted she would go wherever he wanted to. “But really, we haven’t decided anything,” he said again, trying to reassure them.

 Tasha and Patterson both nodded and the three of them were quiet as they swirled their glasses and gazed out at the skyline. Kurt cleared his throat and they turned back towards him.

 “Alright, we’ve gone from condoms to Colorado,” he said with a grin and they laughed. “You guys have got to have some better questions for me.”

 “I thought you hated this and wanted us to quit it,” Tasha said, returning his grin as she took a sip of her drink.

 “Have to prove myself as a worthy boyfriend,” he said with a shrug as he took a sip of his own drink. “Alright, I’ve got one more sip here, you guys get one more question.”

 They looked between each other and then back at him.

 “Tell us your favorite moment with Jane so far,” Tasha said with a smile. “And don’t keep it PG on our account,” she added with a wink.

 Kurt laughed and shook his head, leaning back in his chair as he looked over beside him at the spot beside their table.

 “It was here,” he said softly. “We had dinner out here and then afterwards, we just started dancing. We didn’t even have any music, I think I hummed something in her ear,” he said with a sheepish smile. He looked up and saw them staring back at him, waiting for him to continue.

 “Anyways, we were dancing and then it started raining. And I mean, pouring. But neither of us made a move to go anywhere. She just pulled me closer and kissed me and we just kept dancing,” he said with a laugh, shaking his head at the memory. “And it was just the best feeling of being here with her, nowhere else we had to be except with each other.”

 He looked back up at the two of them who were both shaking their heads at him.

 “What?” he said, raising his eyebrow at them. “Not spicy enough for you?”

 Tasha laughed and shook her head, looking over at Patterson who returned her smile.

 “You’ve got it bad,” she said with a smirk. “Real bad.”

 Kurt laughed and shrugged his shoulders, unable to contain his own smile.

 “Yeah, I mean...at this rate, we’re not far away from you going out and buying a ring to put on her finger,” Patterson added with a laugh.

 Kurt brought his glass up to his lips and raised his eyebrows, taking the last sip of his drink. He was silent as he put his glass down on the table, keeping his eyes on it as he rolled it around in his hand.

 They were quiet as they observed his silence, the realization slowly sinking in as they sat up in their seats.

 “You didn’t...” Patterson gasped, slapping her hands on the table. “Oh my god, you bought a ring?!” she shrieked.

 “Uh uh....” he said disapprovingly, lifting his head and shaking his finger at them. “You had your questions,” he added teasingly. “Time’s up.”

 “No... no, no, no...” Tasha said in disbelief, shaking her head as she said it. “This changes everything. My questions would be totally different if I had known you bought a ring. Like color...cut...clarity...”

 “Well,” Kurt said with a shrug, “you used up your questions on condoms so too bad for you.”

 Tasha groaned and slumped forward, burying her head in her arms on the table. “I hate you,” she mumbled and both Kurt and Patterson laughed.

 “Hey there,” they heard from the door and they turned to see Jane leaning against it, grinning at them. “I didn’t know you two were coming over,” she said as she walked over to stand behind Kurt, placing her hands on his shoulders. He reached up and covered her hands with his.

 “Uninvited guests,” he murmured with a grin, winking at them. “Come on, let’s get you a glass so you can join us,” he said as he stood and hooked his arm around her waist. “And some food. If I know you, you didn’t eat before your class,” he said, leaning in to press a kiss to the side of her head as they walked inside.

 Tasha and Patterson watched them go before turning to each other and Tasha shook her head as she reached to refill her glass.

 “I can’t believe he bought a ring,” she whispered. Patterson chuckled but didn’t respond right away, her eyes slowly moving towards the interior of the apartment where Jane and Kurt stood in the kitchen.

 “I can,” she said softly after a minute. “Look at them.”

 Tasha followed her gaze and couldn’t help but smile at what she saw.

 Kurt had his arm wrapped around Jane’s waist, holding her close as he held her hand in his other hand against his chest. He had his head dipped down so his lips were next to Jane’s ear and she grinned as she leaned closer to him as he swayed them side to side.

 They were dancing.

 “I don’t think we have to worry about Jane,” Patterson said, tilting her head towards Tasha with a smile. “Or Kurt. They both seem like they’re right where they belong.”

 Tasha returned her friend’s smile and lifted her glass towards her, holding it out as Patterson picked hers up.

 “I’ll cheers to that.”

[lookoolah]

208 with whatever ship you want 💕

thanks francy ily!!

208. At what point did you think that was a good idea?

Simon wascovered in dirt, his jeans were ripped, he had at least 3 scratches on his face– at least only one of them was bleeding – and he was sitting on the ground inthe pouring rain, watching Jace walk out of his car a few feet away that he gota couple of months ago due to his newfound obsession with cars that startedafter randomly volunteering to go to a car museum with Luke and Clary. Hisfacial expression immediately changed from annoyed to horrified as he ran up towhere Simon was sitting on the sidewalk.

 -      Ohmy god, what happened? Was there an attack? Are you still getting hunted forbeing a daylighter? Are there demons around? Was it some dumbass shadowhunterbecause I swear to god if it was, I’m not even going to bother telling Alec,I’m just going to go beat his ass myself, who the fuck gave him the right to-

-      Nothinglike that happened, dude, chill, I’m safe! – Simon interrupted him, a warmfeeling forming in his chest at the realization that Jace was worried about him.

-      Oh.– He made a pause, trying his best to go back to the annoyed uncaringexpression that he constantly tries to remain when Simon is around, despite howa giggle or two always does slip whenever Simon makes a joke that is just toonerdy or dumb and then he always turns to Jace, never missing the chance togive him a wink and finger guns and always getting an attempt to suppress asmile and an eyeroll back.

-      Whathappened then? – Jace kneeled down helping Simon up. – Can you walk?

-      Ithink so. – Simon said and after making a step he completely regretted thatsentence, feeling the shooting pain in his knee. – Oh fuck nope, never mind. Sorry,I didn’t have anyone else to call because Clary and Izzy weren’t answering andMagnus and Alec are somewhere in the Caribbean right now and I honestly didn’thave anyone else’s number. Maybe just call me an uber and I’ll just get to theJade Wolf myself, I’ll pay you back as soon as possible, I promise, I justdon’t have any money on me right now, but I have a piggy bank that I’ve had forthe past few years, I’m sure there are enough quarters there to make around 10bucks, I mean I’ve had it for quite a while, I put all my change that I gotfrom the tips since I started working as a waiter senior year of high school,that didn’t quite turn out so well though-

-      Ohby the angel, do you ever stop talking? – Jace said, as he easily picked Simonoff the ground bridal style and started walking to his car.

-      W-whatare you doing? – Simon asked, trying not to think about how he’s literallygetting carried bridal style by motherfucking Captain America.

-      I’lldrive you to the Institute, you can take a shower, clean up, I think we havesome blood there left over from some mission that we had been working on withRaphael’s clan. – Jace said as he helped Simon into the front seat and evenbuckled his seatbelt for him, even though Simon had only hurt his knee and wasperfectly capable of doing that himself, but he didn’t complain, feeling Jace’sscent surround him. He smelled of… honeydew? Out of all things that Simonexpected Jace “The Big Strong Shadowhunter” to smell like, honeydew was definitely not one of them.

-      Areyou sure? It’s alright, I can just take a nap at the storage place and I havesome blood in the mini fridge there and then I’ll go to Magnus’s when Alec andhe come back and I’ll take a shower there, you don’t have to do all this-

-      Simon,it’s fine. – Jace said as he buckled his own seatbelt and then after a secondof hesitation, he turned to Simon and gave him a soft look. – I want to.

Simon felt likehis heart just grew some wings and flew far away to fucking Alaska. He gaveJace a small smile and whispered, “Thank you.”

For a second he thought he caught Jace blushing, but the moment was gone as he turnedhis head and started the car. He cleared his throat and after a brief moment ofsilence asked:

-       So,what happened to you?

Simon sighedaudibly, embarrassment causing him to hide his face in his palms and he let outa small laugh, shocked by how idiotic what he did was.

 -      You’regonna call me dumb.

-      Youbet your ass I am. – Jace chuckled, turning the wheel and almost bumping into atree. – It took him around 4 times to pass the permit test and he still didn’thave his license so Simon didn’t understand why is he driving a brand newNissan instead of taking driving lessons or something, but it was Jace and Jacewould never admit that he wasn’t good at something, especially if it was somemundane thing that Clary and Simon both knew how to do better than him.

Simon shook hishead, turning to look out of the window.

-      Therewas a banana peel on the ground and I wanted to see if it’s actually possibleto slip on it like they do in the movies because it always looks so fake! And Imean, it probably is because they definitely don’t have those actors actuallyfall into a giant puddle of dirt like I did, but yeah basically, it’s possible.– Simon said, rubbing one of the scratches on his forehead.

-      Youknow what isn’t possible though? To be this big of a fucking idiot, Simon!

-      Itdidn’t seem so idiotic at the time, okay? It was an experiment! For science.

-      Atwhat point did you think that was a good idea?

-      Ididn’t, I was just willing to risk my body and my health for science! Like atrue scientist would. You’re just too shallow to understand it. – Simon said,holding back a laugh. He felt like if he could stand up right now he woulddefinitely stomp his foot a couple of times.

-      You’reright, I’m definitely too shallow to understand the deep thought process thattakes place in your brilliant head before you do these… scientifically geniusthings.

-      Exactly,I’m out here risking my life and my body for the bettering of the human raceand you, Jace Lightwood, won’t even thank me? How disrespectful. How!Dis-res-pect-ful! You know what, pull over, I’ll get out of the car right now!I don’t need you and your uneducated comments to my hypotheses! – Simon wasyelling now, enjoying himself way too much.

 He didn’t expectfor Jace to be extra enough to actually pull over, but he did.

-      Howdare you call my comments uneducated! I believed in you, I supported you, I wasrooting for you! We were all rooting for you! – Jace was yelling in Simon’sface, shaking his hands all over the car and Simon couldn’t help but startlaughing hysterically.

-      Areyou quoting Tyra Banks? – Simon said, wiping his tears, unable to stoplaughing.

Jacewas laughing too now, loud and beautiful, his eyes crinkling and his smile wideand carefree. His laugh sounded more beautiful than any song Simon could evereven dream of writing, his laugh brought so many butterflies to Simon’sstomach, he felt like they were gonna start coming out of his ass, his laughwas something Simon never imagined it to me, so colorful and so calming, so Jace.

-      Idon’t know, I just saw a gif on twitter, the tweet was something like when thewoman who threads your eyebrows makes them too thin or some shit, I don’t know.– Jace said, his smile still wide.

Simon shook hishead, looking at Jace fondly. God, one day he was going to make that boy hisand it was going to be the best day of his undead life.

Jace gave himanother blinding smile and pulled back onto the road, almost turning the wheelthe wrong way and riding onto the sidewalk. Simon was starting to think that hemight get to the institute with more injuries than he originally had but hedidn’t say anything, knowing damn well that Jace would just go on a 40 minuterant about how he’s not some kind of  amundane and that he excels at everything he does and that he already has hispermit and that’s surely good enough and then maybe also talk about how he onlyfailed those first 3 times because he wanted to see what it’s like to fail atsomething in life, he wanted to see what it’s like to be a normal human beingand so on and so on and so on and Simon, frankly, didn’t mind listening to therant, he was just a little worried that he’ll roll his eyes so hard that theymight get stuck. Jace was honest to god one of the most annoying people thatSimon had ever met and somehow that was his favorite thing about him.

They sat therein a few moments of silence, both of them continuing to smile to themselves,randomly looking over at each other and looking away immediately as the otherone looked at them. Jace shook his head and looked down at his hands as theystopped at a red light:

-      You’rean idiot. – He said, somehow that sounding more loving than any compliment evercould.

Simonstared at him for a bit, realizing that he is absolutely gone for this boy. Forthis cocky, annoying, loving, kind, beautiful boy.

-      Yeah,but you still like me.

Jacelooked over at him a little stunned and stared at him for a good 10 secondsbefore his lips stretched out into a dopey smile and he turned back to theroad, as the red light turned green again. He pressed gas a little too hard andalmost hit the car in front of them:

-      Yeah,I do.

[you-did-well-my-love]

Drama Review: Introverted Boss

I don’t think I have ever been so satisfied with the ending of the drama.

Rating: 4.5/5 I was going to rate it a four, but that last episode was absolutely amazing.

OST: Most of the ost is pretty typical but like I have had B1A4 Sandeul’s song on repeat since it ended like shit it’s so good. 

Genre: Romantic Comedy, Business

Synopsis: Eun Hwan-Ki is the CEO of a public relations company, but he is extremely shy. Due to his personality, even his employees do not know him well. Chae Ro-Woon begins work at Eun Hwan-Ki’s company. She is very energetic and receives recognition for her work, but her only interest is in CEO Eun Hwan-Ki. She plans to reveal who Eun Hwan-Ki really is. (source: asianwiki)

Trigger Warning: This drama deals heavily with mental health. The opening scene is a woman committing suicide. (I was honestly surprised at how graphic it was. Obviously it’s nowhere near 13 Reasons Why, but they showed more than I’ve ever seen in a drama outside of Let’s Fight Ghost which was about dead people.) The main lead has social anxiety. A character has depression. Visual self harm. etc.

Thoughts/Review: (no spoilers)

It’s been so long since this drama ended so this review is going to be scattered, but my GOD did I love this drama.

I wasn’t even going to watch this drama. I had it on my list, but the initial response to it was so negative, I took it off. But then I saw this one gifset of the male lead stroking the girl’s face while lying in a bed and I felt so much tension just from those gifs, I was immediately taken.

And honestly, Hwarang was so dry I was like dying of thirst and when I saw that gifset just drenched in chemistry I was sold.

I could see where the negative reviews came from. The editing was very jumpy - jumping back and forth to the various different things going on but, like, I couldn’t tell what was going on.

The transitions were really weird. The writers were awkward with introducing the characters. And then the drama started out with a woman jumping off of a building, and it takes you forever to find out who she was. JUST FYI that scene took place three years before the rest of the drama. They should have put “Three Years Later” at the bottom of the screen, no clue why they didn’t.

They could have used a bit more depth in setting up the characters. Whereas most dramas take two to three episodes to set up the plot, this drama just dived right in. Pretty much “everything” was set up in episode one. And I say that in quotation marks because of the episode 5 situation (explained below).

BUT once everything started to make sense, I was really intrigued. They had a really good story, it was just a rocky start. Get past the rocky start!

Much of the controversy was surrounding the female lead Park Hye Soo’s acting. I can’t argue with it. She wasn’t awful, but it seemed like it was her first lead role. She seemed like the type that can act well in minor roles, but something felt off with her line delivery... it felt almost forced. I think part of it was the weird script, because it got better after episode 4. Obviously it didn’t bother me enough to stop watching the drama, I stopped noticing it much the later I got into the drama. I guess the experience did well for her.

For those of you who don’t know or don’t remember when the news broke, the drama skipped a week to rewrite the script. This happened after episode 4. If you are watching and you’re not really feeling it, my advice is to wait and watch episodes 5 and 6 because that’s where a lot of things are fixed, everything gets explained, and the plot picks up.

NOTE: From what I gathered when watching, the writers changed the central conflict. There are a few continuity errors, but it’s understandable considering they film these dramas while they’re airing.

It was really quirky. The bright colors, the tone, the dialogue. It reminded me a bit of the extra-ness of jdramas. It had that lighthearted, fun feeling like Sassy Go Go, Surplus Princess, Marriage Not Dating (from what I’ve heard), Cinderella and Four Knights, Shopping King Louis, etc.

However, the deeper you get into the show, the more things appear to be not what they seem. So while “everything” is explained in episode 5, aside from the personal conflicts and episodic conflicts, there was this mystery brewing. A sort of underlying sketchyness that kept growing until the end.

I absolutely adored this drama. From the comedy (which was golden btw) to the use of irony to the characters to the romance. It is up on my list of top dramas for 2017.

The comedy: there was a lot of witty dialogue and utilization of each of the characters’ little quirks. The actors did amazing, a lot of it was expressions and motions tied in with dialogue that wouldn’t have been nearly as entertaining if the actors delivered it badly.

Yeon Woo Jin did such an amazing job as Eun Hwan Gi. He made this character come to life in such a raw and realistic way, I am truly impressed. I’m looking forward to seeing him in his next drama. I, someone with a social anxiety disorder, relate to Eun Hwan Gi so much it’s frightening. But that’s what made me love the drama even more. It made me feel a deeper connection to any kdrama character I have ever felt, and his thought process was so much like mine (always overthinking things) it made me root for him that much more. 

I felt so much for him seeing him make the efforts because I know from personal experience how hard it was for him. He was unable to do the mean thing despite it being the right thing because it was mean. He was so not the typical male kdrama lead, and he broke a lot of gender stereotypes. Plus he was freaking adorable. He had all these charms; his drunk habit for one lol, + he was caring, he watched over everyone, and when he did succeed in conquering his fear step by step as a viewer it fills you with so much warmth.

He’s just such a wonderful person and it brings you unbelievable joy as a viewer to see the rest of the characters slowly realize this too.

ALSO HE WAS LIKE HEALER’S BONG SOO ALIAS EXCEPT IN REAL PERSON FORM AND I LOVED IT.

And then when we finally got to see his frustration. Social anxiety is not this cute introvert nerd, it’s a pain in the ass and I am so glad/proud/thankful that the writers showed this side of it.

I want to take a second to mention the symbolism. I adored the symbolism behind his hood and what it meant for him to take it off/put it on. It was just one more key to understanding the character + it made you feel all the things when he was comfortable enough to take it off.

Chae Ro Woon... It was hard to judge her change because it was so sudden, but I thought her change was for the better. Yet there were still some things that annoyed me. A lot of time the writers used her inappropriate(?) behavior to move the plot along, but there were still instances I thought she was way over the line. However in my opinion, a lot of the hate towards her was out of line because her main goal was revenge and it seemed like people kept forgetting that. Especially later on, I thought Chae Ro Woon was just absolutely amazing. She was so understanding of Hwan Gi, even though it took her some time (which is realistic), and she was accepting of him. She didn’t push him too hard to change, she gave him space, and did what she could to make him comfortable. I loved it.

I was also a little disappointed with what the writers did with Hyo Sung’s character, specifically the way she treated Hwan Gi, but I’m going to attribute that to the story change and that if the writers could they would go back and take out that one scene from episode 2(?) to make her character understandable.

I’m not going to mention how I feel about Kang Woo Il, or Eun Yi Soo for that matter, because everything surrounding them is a spoiler. They’re complicated, especially Yi Soo. While I may not have been fond of them, I understood them. Especially Yi Soo. Which is what I believe is the most important when it comes to a character.

I LOVED YOO HEE. I don’t know if either of you have seen the Taiwanese drama Refresh Man, but it was another office romance and there was this older woman who saw the main character’s feelings for the girl and tried to set them up. I loved it. And the same thing pretty much happened here. It was hilarious.

Yeon Jung, usually I hate characters like her, but she was so amazing. She was annoying as a love interest but necessary as a friend, and I am actually glad a character like her was in the drama.

The romance. The sexual tension between Eun Hwan Gi and Chae Ro Woon was tangible. I loved how he slowly opened up to her, and it was symbolic in his hood and the way his voice became louder the more comfortable he became. Spoiler: they kiss a shit ton of times. I loved every second. 

The drama did a lot of things I didn’t expect. There were really straightforward conversations (the how-far-have-you-gone one), admissions of wrongful actions, actual apologies from multiple characters (all the characters that needed to imo) that I didn’t expect to happen, girls telling people off and breaking every drama stereotype.

A little thing I really liked was how, you know when dramas are like “we’ve wrapped up the plot but still have two episodes” so they create a conflict which is usually super random and off topic? This one tied back to the original roots of the plot and it fit so well with the theme of the whole drama. There was a huge presence of family in the drama, both Ro Woon’s and Hwan Gi’s, and I was very appreciative of how they wrapped up.

And, hun, while I stumbled over the time jump in the last episode, that ending was FANTASTIC. I don’t need to say anything else. Just that it was so damn satisfying.

Someone get me an Eun Hwan Gi please and thank you.

~~~

Finished 3/14/17